#father daughter duo about to kick your ass!

[atropabellatrix]

What if, right after the events of Bayonetta Origins: Cereza and The Lost Demon, Little Cerezita stumbled on her father, Balder? And what if they teamed up to go rescue Rosa?

[wwestrang-fan]

Wanting the enemy

Drew McIntyre x oc reader

warning : a bit of age gap, reader feeling insecure, feeling of loneliness.

Summary: After a few months in NXT, August finally made her debut on Raw alongside her dad's return to WWE. Things were going pretty well for her until Drew McIntyre started causing trouble for both her and her dad.

In the locker room, August tugged on the last strap of her ring gear, letting out a relieved sigh as the tight fabric finally came off. She was still riding the adrenaline high from her match. Just as she was grabbing her clothes, Rhea strutted in, confidence radiating from her. "Hey, August!" she called, casually leaning against the wall. "You wanna hang out with me and Damian for a bit?"

Augustpaused, the offer hanging in the air. "Yeah, thanks, but I think I'm just gonna chill here for a while," she replied, her heart not quite in it.

Rhea shrugged with a playful smirk. "Suit yourself. Don’t be a stranger!” With that, she walked back out.

As August stepped into the hallway, she caught sight of Drew leaning against the wall. He had that signature brooding look on his face, arms crossed, staring straight at her. A knot formed in her stomach. Ever since her debut and her dad’s big comeback, the buzz surrounding them had become deafening. Most of the fans were hyped about the father-daughter duo, but Drew? He wasn’t part of that fan club. Not even close.

He’d been relentless in tossing insults and attacks her dad’s way, even interrupting her promos and her match to get his digs in, which usually only left August feeling more frustrated. And now, here he was, looking like he was about to say something just as sarcastic and annoying.

August rolled her eyes, as she stepped through the backstage area. She pulled out her phone, fingers quickly tapping to summon an Uber. Just as she was about to hit “request,” she felt a presence beside her.

Drew walked up, a smirk dancing on his lips. “What are you doing,” he said, his Scottish accent drawing out the words playfully.

She shot him a glare. “Not your business, Drew,” she replied curtly, returning her attention to her phone. The app was glitching, and her irritation rose with every second of waiting.

He leaned in closer, eyes narrowing as he noticed her struggle. “You’re really having trouble getting an Uber, aren’t you? Why don’t you just ride with me? It’ll save you the hassle.”

August scoffed, crossing her arms defensively. “Yeah, right. I trust you about as much as I trust a sandwich left out for days.”

Drew chuckled, unfazed by her sarcasm. “Come on, I’m not that bad. Besides, you can’t stand there all day, can you?

She hesitated, weighing her options. The thought of enduring more tech issues didn’t sound appealing, and the idea of a few moments of silence in his car seemed oddly tempting.

“Fine,” she finally relented, rolling her eyes. “But if this goes south, I’m kicking your ass.”

"Drew grinned, motioning for her to follow him.

As they walked side by side, August couldn’t help but feel the awkward tension shifting. She may not like him much, but maybe a ride wouldn’t be the worst compromise.

As the cab pulled up to the hotel, Drew turned to August with a triumphant grin. “See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

August rolled her eyes, pushing the door open to step out onto the curb. “You say that like a car ride with you was a picnic in the park.” She stepped out onto the pavement, smoothing down her outfit as she took in the bustling scene around them.

Drew chuckled, stepping out behind her and adjusting his jacket. “Hey, at least I didn’t start any fights or make snarky comments. Progress, right?”

She shot him a sideways glance, the corners of her mouth pulling into a reluctant smile. “I guess. Just don’t let it go to your head,” she replied, leading the way toward the hotel entrance.

They walked through the revolving door, entering the bright lobby.

Drew casually, cross his arms. “You know, you could lighten up a bit. I’m just trying to be nice here.”

August glanced back at him, raising an eyebrow. “You being nice is like a lion not Huntington—totally out of character.”

Drew laughed, following her toward the elevator. “Touché. But you know, life’s too short to be that serious all the time.”

She pressed the button for their floor, the elevator doors sliding shut behind them. “And you think I should take life advice from you?” she shot back, a teasing lilt to her voice.

“Why not? I’m practically a philosopher when I want to be.” He leaned against the wall, that infuriating charm of his shining through.

August rolled her eyes again but couldn’t suppress a smile. Maybe being around him wouldn't’t be utterly miserable after all.

As August stepped into the hallway, the lights overhead cast a warm glow on the polished floors. She glanced down the corridor, noting the room numbers as they approached hers. “Well, this is my stop,” she said, stopping in front of her door, a hint of hesitation in her tone.

Drew lingered a few steps behind, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then? We’ve got that media session early, right?” He leaned casually against the wall, an easy smile lingering on his lips.

“Yeah, bright and early,” she replied, her voice teasing. “Don’t be late, or I might just let the cat out of the bag about your ‘philosopher’ skills.”

Drew chuckled, flashing her a playful wink. “I look forward to it. And hey, if I can survive this ride with you, I can handle anything.”

August sighed, shaking her head but unable to hide the smile that tugged at her lips. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

“Impossible is my middle name,” he shot back, straightening up suddenly. “But we should do this more often.”

She turned to face him fully, crossing her arms. “Don’t push your luck, Drew.

“Night, August.” He grinned, turning to leave.

“Goodnight,” she replied, opening her door. As she stepped inside her room, she glanced back one last time, catching him turn down the hall.

He turned to wave, and she waved back, the moment surprisingly light and enjoyable. Closing the door, she let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

[filipinosamflynn]

It took me a few months, but I finally finished Iron Gold! Let me burn the kitchen down as I cook!

Note: I'm not the American education system, so I consider a 6/10 a good score. 6/10 to me means it's good but I don't think I want to read it again until years in the future.

Total Score: 8/10 - hard to read at the beginning, but phenomenonal second half. The multiple perspectives are fun, but kind of jarring to get into, some of the perspective shifts can get enfuriating by creating cliff hangers. That's obviously the intention, but come on, nobody's favorite part about a show are its cliffhangers.

Below is my tier list of all the characters:

Spoilers, unstructured thoughts, word vomit, and objectively incorrect opinions ahead. This review is based on my experience reading the book, the quality of it is obviously amazing.

Characters: 9.5/10 - Everybody is still amazing, and almost all of the new characters are so fun and well characterized! I would have given this 10/10 if not for Harmony not showing up at all in this book. I think the last time she was physically present is in Golden Son, then she is mentioned to have started the Red Hand in Morning Star but she does not show up, then when the Red Hand DOES show up in Iron Gold, she somehow still isn't there. HUH???? WASN'T THAT LYRIA'S WHOLE THING BEFORE THE TELEMANUS ADVENTURES AND THE FUNNY KIDNAPPING???? But ignoring that red bitch (and dano too, fuck that guy), Lyria is a surprising stand out to me, I love her so much and that's what surprises me. Literally all she does is be a victim, and honestly I'm here for it. It's so easy to root for an underdog character, and that's the reason why I wanted to read Red Rising in the first place, to watch an underdog character fight through their circumstances. Also, FUCKING HELL WHY DOES HER STORY END LIKE THAT???? SHE'S FUCKING INNOCENT GIVE MY GIRL A FUCKING BREAK 😭😭😭😭

Ephraim took like 70% of the book for me to like, but once the perspectives crossed over, we saw more development from him outside of his drug addiction, and him being ✨️GAY✨️ without it being the sole focus of his story being extremely awesome. Gay media doesn't get me, sometimes I just wanna see a dude who happens to be gay fuck shit up. He just needed to be more than just "the gruff mercenary", and him struggling to kill Lyria made me finally like him. I do wish we had moments of him being likable earlier, I mean I get we needed to establish him being grumpy, but I really wish we had scenes of Ephraim and Volga being friends earlier in the book. I was expecting them to be this fuck ass father daughter duo when I first started reading, but I guess not. I do love their bond a lot though, and him going through hell and back for Pax & Electra was everything I needed out of this character. Also as a side tangent, the Cyra being a spy plot just happens then goes nowhere? I mean, HUH????? I was so confused, I looked her up online, and nobody talks about Cyra. She just... exists to die and be a useless plot reveal? Unless I'm missing something, she feels like one of the most useless deaths in the series. Oh well, back to Ephraim. Yeah, I liked him a whole lot more after I realized he's into Japanese army men and footjobs.

Here's an obvious one: Darrow becomes slightly unlikable! Yeah, I didn't expect it, I still love him, but sometimes while reading this dude do war shit and ignore his wife makes me want to football kick him into a therapy chair. And then he teams up with Apollonius and, it's so fucking obvious him and Tharsus are gonna betray Darrow and curb stomp his ass. Darrow, you bitch ass motherfucker, just be with your god damn son you son of a bitch. 💀 His ending though, man you can really FEEL his absolute despair. It's not an exciting despair like at the ending of Golden Son, it's a slow, harsh, burning one you have to sit with. "It was all useless" is SUCH an awesome trope, I simply adore it. Poor Sevro.

Now onto our pathetic bitch boy of the hour: Lysander. I've known about his reputation amongst fans since I started the series, and I've been so excited to see this little shit fuck shit up and...! He's so pathetic. I'm a little disappointed by how pathetic he is compared to my expectations of him being this evil little shit. However, he turned out to be my favorite perspective. Just watching this little man who I know becomes horrible just grovel in himself, slowly rising to power, then avoiding almost every single action of good he can take is awesome. My enjoyment is also added by all of the Raas being so fun, especially Dido. This bitch... serve cunt and be evil is her motto and I love it 💅✨️

Perspectives Ranked: Lysander is my favorite perspective, him rising to power in the Rim from nothing is just satisfying, and excites me for what hell is to come in Dark Ages. I love a good villain.

Lyria is my second favorite, I just love underdogs, what can I say?

Third favorite is Ephraim. I didn't like him nor get what his deal was at the first half. I didn't know where his story would go, and I didn't give a shit about whatever the Duke of Hands wanted. Only when we got development did he become a very fun character.

Fourth favorite is Darrow. His perspective isn't bad, but it was just kind of disheartening to see my boy do all this shit and accidentally make the wrong decisions. Of course, his perspective is far from bad, it was just hard to root for him.

Personal Enjoyment: 7/10 - This was a hard book to get through in the beginning. They have to re-establish the world and you're forced to try and get through 4 different characters' perspectives. Establishing the new world, the characters, and their reason for being important is rather slow for a series with such a breakneck pace, so it was annoying to get through to be honest. Not to mention that the perspective shifts can be rough or annoying in that "TV Show cliffhanger" style. Another personal thing, because of all the re-establishing and the perspective shifting, I forgot a lot of plot points and motivations. I didn't know why Ephraim was speaking with the Duke of Hands nor what his purpose or deal was for quite a while, like I didn't know what Holiday had to do with Ephraim until the 2nd half when they said Trigg was Ephraim's fiance. I didn't even know Ephraim was going to steal until he kidnapped Pax & Electra. The story is great, but this is the first time I've read a book with multiple story lines in different perspectives, and added onto the complex web of connections and all sorts of other story bullshit, it's easy to see why I got lost and had to drop the book for a few months. However once I finally got used to everything in the 2nd half, it was an EXTREMELY fun read that made up for the hard to understand and read through first half. This is feels like a book I only appreciate on the prospect of a re-read where I know what happens since the blind read was, uh, annoying.

Plot: 8/10 - As I said, the beginning was kind of annoying to get through and I can't for the life of me remember anything that happened to Ephraim at the start, and 25% of Darrow's & Lysander's plotline. It's just a me thing. The story as a whole is extremely fun, all the twists and events are a blast to read (except for Ephraim's moping at the start of the book, if he even moped because as I said before, I can't remember shit about Ephraim from part 1 except that he has a fancy gun and the Duke of Hands wanted to cut off his hand if he didn't do the thing). Lyria's story was the most engaging for me from start to finish, so that's a plus. Really, my opinion on this book is kind of being carried by the 2nd half, which sucks because this is still a really great book! I just had a hard time following it. But the plot was great, and (obviously) the action scenes are a highlight. The Cassius kills a bunch of dudes and says his honor remains scene is badass as all hell, Lyria's desperate escape from the Red Hand + its aftermath is so visceral and everything I love about the series, Ephraim saving the kids is the best scene in the book in my opinion, and the realization of "it was all for nothing" upon the Ash Lord's reveal was just UGH 😭 I LOVE THAT SHIT!

My Expectations Heading Into Dark Ages:

• Cassius isn't dead, it's too obvious. Not only did we pull that shit off with Dancer and Uncle Narol, but we didn't see a body, and his death just felt weirdly unsatisfying for a series like Red Rising. Cassius didn't even get to talk to Pytha or his frot buddy Darrow once, so yeah, not dead.

• Victra is going to be this fuck ass antihero doing the wrong things for the right reason of finding her daughter. I can feel her getting a character arc in Dark Ages.

• Mustang's perspective is coming up in Dark Ages and OOOOOHHHHHHH IM SO FUCKING EXCITED TO READ THROUGH THEM, Mustang has remained strong of my favorite character in the series. Sevro is a very close 2nd favorite, but Mustang is the Beyonce of Red Rising.

• I know Darrow gets absolutely FUCKED in Dark Ages. Good. Let me whump.

• I have no clue what will happen with Lyria & Ephraim, but hopefully they don't die! I think Lyria doesn't get a perspective in Dark Ages so *i am scared*.

• Lysander will be so fucking fun to read through now that he's no longer just a pathetic hacky sack getting kicked around. I wanna finally despise and hate this little shit for fun, he looks like he's gonna have the same fuck ass stage presence as the Jackal. Just a feeling on the vibes Lysander will hold.

• I know Dark Ages will destroy me, so I already have Lightbringer ready as my detox, and a box of tissues bought for when I start.

• Harmony BETTER show up. She has literally done nothing since Golden Son (yeah she technically started Red Hand in Morning Star but RH literally did nothing there, and Harmony herself hasn't shown up for 2 straight books).

[pico-digital-studios]

Into, Across and Beyond! Cast: ChaosIIUniverse Sonic and Sonia

Replaces: Peter B. Parker / Webb-verse Spidey (CU!Sonic) and Mayday Parker (CU!Sonia) Created by: ToonsiteComics

"Here's the one you've been waiting for!" - CU!Sonic

"The name is Sonia Rose, and I'm here to kick your asses straight to jail!" - CU!Sonia

A Sonic in the Blur Gang who's actually started a family? Who'd have thought it?

ChaosIIUniverse Sonic is the lead hero of his dimension, and after marrying his Amy Rose, they had a daughter together, affectionately named Sonia Rose, who takes after both her father and mother.

However, due to some unknown circumstances, Amy passed away, leaving Sonic a single father as he raised Sonia on his own. He taught her about swimming (which involved giving her LOTS of floaties), was there for her when choosing the right preschool (taking offense to any that didn't have chilli dogs on the lunch menu), comforting her when she had been bullied in school, scolding her when she accidentally breaks some stuff, and even teaching her stuff like how to tie her shoelaces.

This checking, of course, goes both ways, with Sonia herself keeping tabs on her dad to ensure he's not trying to get another spouse without her permission, even confiscating a chilli dog when he's caught texting Elise. Seems like that controlling side of Amy rubbed off on her daughter.

When some thieves started wreaking havoc around Sonic's home city, however, he had to be away from home a lot more, which inspired Sonia to try and help to make her dad proud. For instance, she showed up and intruded on a bank robbery, somehow stealing the robbers' weapons AND their bomb when their guards were dropped. Granted, she didn't know how to disarm the bomb afterwards, but Sonic arrived in good time to send it straight to the nearest desert.

Unfortunately, the thieves escaped with the cash, and Sonic felt upset with his daughter for jeopardising that mission and getting herself into danger. Once he realised her motivations for doing so, however, he calmed down and felt sorry himself for his upset, considering she's one of the few reasons why he's still going, especially after the loss of his wife. The two hugged it out and made up, with Sonic promising to spend more time with her if she doesn't try to save the day alone again.

Which brings us to the point of More than One Universe, when the duo are the second ones brought in when OMT!Tails ran off alone. When they found him, he's the second one to chime in about his loss, assuring the kid he wasn't alone in losing someone close to him.

With CU!Sonia still wanting to learn how to be a hero without getting herself in danger, Nitro offered to share his knowledge with her in a special training course, whilst CU!Sonic actively got involved in curing the rogue villains.

“I can relate to what [Nitro] just said. I lost Amy a while back when we had Sonia as a daughter. She was my Mina… It took me a while to move on from then and cope as a single father. Ever since, I kept trying to be the carefree hero she saw me as, but it became tough as time went on. Sonia was all I had left to call family. You shouldn’t have to experience that same darkness.”

During that time, he was even there for Errorverse Sonic, who was also carrying the burden of almost losing everyone he loved to Toxinfect, an event that scarred that version of the Blue Blur for life. The poor guy wasn't afraid to sob in CU!Sonic's arms after venting about it.

After all of that, CU!Sonic and CU!Sonia became the ninth and tenth official members of the Blur Gang, with Sonia tagging along with her father to ensure he's safe, and vice versa.

A temporary point in the Quill Society had them goofing around with Lost Memory Sonic a bit. As you can tell, the hedgehog is not that amused at the father and daughter's silly antics, but still tolerates it.

[straightbaittournament]

only the option with the LEAST votes will be eliminated. propaganda under the cut (and more always welcome!):

chrissie cunningham and eddie munson:

Had the CUTEST SCENE IN THE ENTIRE SHOW where they flirted and he tried to sell her drugs but then SHE GOT MURDERED and it was tragic

ava silva and michael salvius:

They have some amusingly straightbaity scenes where Michael initially appears to be interested in Ava (meeting her in a bar, asking questions about her, pursuing her to get her to do things with him and inviting her to kick ass with him) but almost all of these scenes are explicitly for plot reasons or end up displaying the closeness of Ava and Beatrice (and Beatrice’s jealousy over Ava seemingly being interested in a man) instead. Michael and Ava develop a strong close relationship that feels more sibling-esque by the end of season 2 and also Michael straight up dies at the end of season 2 as well.

nina zenik and matthias helvar:

[MAJOR SPOILER] If they were truly straight Matthias wouldn’t have died (submitter also stated that nina is revealed to be bi/pan)

oscar francois de jarjayes and andre grenadier:

Oscar was afab but her father gave her a boy's name and raised her as a boy (by 18th century standards) because sexism and he had 5 daughters and decided she was going to be a son because they were a noble family and he wanted a son to become a high ranking military official because they're rich so they can just do that. Oscar joins the army and becomes Marie-Antoinette's personal guard. Her and childhood best friend Andre are very close through out the series (he supports her throughout the many scandals that she has to deal with because she works for the royal family) and at the end of the series it is revealed that they are in love, but they are both killed in the war before they can actually get together. The dying before they can be together might fall into the buried straights category but they relationship also has really queer energy because throughout the series it becomes apparent that Oscar usually Does Not Vibe with only the gender she assigned at birth. She sometimes refers to herself as a woman, sometimes refers to herself as a man, but her attitude is usually basically 'I'm a man, I'm a woman, I'm both, I'm neither, stop asking'. So I think they should count as straightbait because we find out that Oscar is nonbinary and Andre loves her no matter what her gender is (and then they die before they can get together).

jason grace and piper mclean:

So. Hera/Juno put a bunch of fake memories in Piper’s head of a months long relationship with Jason. However plot and stuff happens and they end up dating for real. Except no they didn’t. In the next series Apollo goes to them to ask for help and finds out they’ve broken up. Then there was a death prophecy that for once was actually fulfilled (RIP Jason). Finally at the end of ToA Piper was seen kissing a girl and your choice how to interpret that. Got together because a goddess shipped them. Broke up because they realised they were gay.

abbie mills and ichabod crane:

They both start out as main characters, working together since ep. 1. Next three seasons follow the regular m/f protagonist duo pattern: they need each other's help, there's chemistry going on, there are heartwrenching scenes and dramatic sacrifices, they learn they can only truly rely on each other - so the next step is to let them be together, right? Wrong. The next step is to let lt. Mills make a final sacrifice, which on top of killing the pairing insults her as a character - suddenly from the POV protagonist she started as she's demoted to secondary character who always was just there to be the main guy's support. There are some feelings acknowledged, but no confessions or promises exchanged during the final fleeting reunion. Three-seasons-worth of build-up and then she dies.

valkyrie and thor:

Like a lot of ships with a white man and a woman of color, their chemistry and history get shunted to the side by racist writers and fans who refuse to acknowledge them as anything other than friends.

buffy summers and spike:

Buffy's a vampire slayer and Spike's a vampire. Enemies to Lovers. Absolutely not intended by creators, creators treated it like a joke at first, then some of the writers/producers actively hated it even throughout their canon relationship, they don't technically get together in the end, also he dies (kind of. he's brought back in another show. and the comics. it's complicated). Very queercoded relationship despite being m/f - desire, euphoria, shame, slowburn, keeping it a secret, doesn't think anyone else will understand or accept them, wanting to change for the better.

peggy carter and daniel sousa:

She’s the best secret agent, he’s a hot as hell disabled war vet They get together, but also don’t because apparently Steve Rogers is a homewrecker Peggy moved on after losing Steve, got together with the amazing Daniel Sousa, and then got broken up because the Russos didn’t want Steve to be seen as being gay for Bucky

entrapta and hordak:

Heavily heavily heavily hinted/slow burn

good luck everybody! now go vote!

[beautifuljellyfishnightmare]

“Tonto’s Giant Nuts!” #CountryMusic #Concert #Comedy #Podcast #Life #Lov...

Tonight on "3 Chords & The Truth!"  “Tonto’s Giant Nuts!” #Podcast #Concert #CountryMusic #Comedy #Life #Love #SelfImprovement  #Health etc. etc. etc.  

     Take it easy, relax, chill, chuckle & enjoy yourself while you watch & listen to #Singer-Songwriter & Citizen Behavioral Scientists Joe Griffin (THE FATHER ) & Molly Griffin (THE DAUGHTER Artist & Songwriter) AKA together they are the the “Singing D.Js” duo & core of the “Griffinheart Family Rhythm Band”  

     Here they present the heaviest #Podcast #Radio & #TV Show on the Planet “3 Chords & The Truth!” Music & “The Meaning Of Life!” & no longer, “Secret To Happiness!” Health & Longevity  FROM SCIENCE!!!

     In a laid-back, downhome, grass roots Honky Tonk style & ambience they present an Acoustic Concert featuring the best covers of popular #ClassicCountry & #Americana Popular Music Songs! Along with these classics they occasionally throw in one of their originals destined for commercial release on radio etc. 

     Interwoven in a blue collar sometimes hilarious banter & style they discuss all manner of subjects on Human Behavior!  Showing the applications in your and everyone's life of Joe’s groundbreaking Discoveries in Behavioral Science including the awesome cutting edge Law Of Nature & Natural Law Of Science “The Evolution In Man & Human Brain Function” and derived from that, the “Evolution Connection!”  which is the most advanced CBT REFRAME Psychotherapy, Life Management Skills Tool, Therapy and System in existence anywhere!  

     This Podcast, Radio & TV Show, Internet Series and YouTube Channel is about Music, Love, Life, Relationships and the latest Gossip, Trends & News!  As well as Health, Self Improvement, Self Love, Mental Health, Parenting, Politics, Money, Business, Purpose, Meaning, Order, Security, Meaning Of Life, Secret To Happiness, Spirituality, Religion  &  Mother Nature  Etc. Etc. Etc. 

     This show is about the Science of the Evolution in us, & how to use it and why it is in Harmony and Synergistic with both Nature, God and Spirituality! 

   In this Episode “Tonto’s Giant Nuts!”  We continue the discussion regarding Amber’s early trauma of EMOTIONAL DEPRIVATION and the resultant Mental illness and Disorders that are being oh so exemplified by her lies and false accusations regarding Johnny and their relationship in the trial!  This is the worst thing that can happen for Females as their long history of Crying Wolf gives them the reputation to the legal system that screws the girls that are telling the TRUTH!  This is where the focus should be on the roots ie “Ladies let’s stop shooting ourselves in the feet!!!”  

     It is often discussed  how understanding the Science or Truth behind the common Purpose & Meaning of life for humans which is to Evolve, your self, your brain & ultimately your DNA as in Family, Tribe  &  Species along with “The Secret To Happiness” & Health which is to cooperate with Nature & your Brain’s Purpose To EVOLVE does not make life less romantic but in fact enhances the romance of life!  

     Things like young lovers, families, babies etc. take on an even more romantic flavour when you become aware that it is all perfect Evolution & exactly what we should be doing!!!  

     Also discussed is the common sense that if Evolution is in all living things, that would include humans & where else would that intent & purpose be except in our brain function!  

     Joe suggests “It’s kind of obvious in a way & someone was bound to find it sooner or later & it just so happened that someone was me!”  Which is lucky for the health & mental health of all of us, better sooner than later!!!  Now we know that shitty brain chemistry represented by varying levels of anxiety, depression & apathy & all the physical ailments & dis-eases that are spinoffs of those are just Mother Natures way of motivating you ie. giving you a kick in the ass for not cooperating with your brain’s intent & obsession to Evolve via 1. Survival 2. Procreation & 3. Evolving which are the key & major components of the essential Evolution Process in humans!!!   

     We now have the Science as in The Truth on ”The Meaning Of Life & “Secret To Happiness” for humans on earth enroute to higher climes!!!  

          Now kick back and enjoy an illuminating & transformational experience as you time travel on our old limo ride to the cornfield...

3 Chords & The Truth! “Music & The Meaning Of Life!” - The Evolution Connection -  Griffinheart Patreon

[mischiefxmuses]

Billy Loomis Intro

Was that [THOMAS DOHERTY]? Oh no no, that was just [BILLY LOOMIS], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [SCREAM]. They are [EIGHTEEN] years old, use [HE/HIM], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here

three years 

what is your character's job**

Film Student

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

After his death 

has any magic affected your character

Not really

and any other information you might find useful for us and the other members to know!!

Billy was always seen as the golden boy. He got top grades, incredibly smart and often quiet. He game from a rich family, father and mother. He loved his parents a lot but always spent more time with his mother. She was around more. She took care of him and raised him. But there was always an expectation of him to be perfect and following in his father’s footsteps. His father did not enjoy the fact that Billy wanted to go to film school and make movies. When he was younger he had a lot of unchecked rage and aggression. His parents just brushing over it instead of actually helping him. 

Billy spent a lot of time around Stu and his family. Stu becoming like a brother to him. Stu’s family becoming like his own. 

Then the affair between his father and sidney’s mother happened and Billy’s mother left. Billy felt lost, without her. He had no relationship with his father except disappointment and judgement. He went deeper inside himself and just found comfort in his rage. He just saw anger. He blamed it all on Sidney’s mother. So that meant that all of his unchecked rage and aggression became what we see in Scream. 

Before the events of Scream, Billy was with Christina, Sam’s mother. He planned on leaving Woodsboro with Christina after he was done with Sidney. He knew she was pregnant, she told him. He did want to leave and be a father. Be a family and do better than his father did with him. But he was killed. 

Sidney meant nothing to him. She was his revenge. Their relationship to him was completely fake. A means to an end. He loved Christina. She was the one he wanted to be with. 

In Washington: 

Billy arrived unaware and had a relationship with Omega. He really liked them a lot. But then his memories came back and Tatum had to open her big mouth and tell Omega. So they broke up. At the beginning Billy did want to try again for Omega and his daughter Sam. To leave his violent tendencies behind and be kind. Be a new person. However, with everyone reminding him of who he was and what he did, not letting him forget it he decided ‘fuck it’ and he has embraced his ghostface persona once more. 

He is living with his new friend Tyler. A hyde. The two of them constantly prank each other. He knows Tyler as the hyde could kick his ass but Billy also trusts him not to. Also with Stu around the duo is back together. Billy is no longer trying to ‘fit in’. 

His one rule: Sam is off limits. He still cares about his daughter and will do anything to protect her. 

He also found a sort of a protege in Josh Washington. 

[starbuckie]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭

challenge: missy’s 2.5k challenge by @saiyanprincessswanie​

prompt: firefighter au

pairing: firefighter!steve rogers x reader

words:  2.6k words

warnings: swearing, steve being an absolute klutz, steve unknowingly being a slut, reader is tired and frustrated, fluff, meet-ugly, bucky being frustrated with steve, autumn vibes that make you wanna go apple picking

summary: a yawning florist finds herself running into a sweet as sugar, but clumsy firefighter at the autumn harvest market on an early, early wednesday morning.

a/n: i’m so sorry that this is so late, missy, but happy happy 2.5k!! i was so happy to kick off october with this piece because if there’s anything i love, it’s blushing firefighter!steve :) i hope you all enjoy this and if you do, make sure to rablog and comment <3

Steve grunted when he and Bucky rounded the corner of Mr. DeNunzio’s law firm. Tents and beeping trucks were set up across the usually empty plaza, with people unloading goods and crates onto rickety plastic tables. It was new. Steve didn’t like it. 

“What are people just standin’ around over here for?” Steve questioned his best friend. He took a sip out of coffee-filled Hydro Flask, decorated with small stickers Bucky's daughter had given him over the five small years she’d been alive. They were childish things, little sparkly butterflies and vampires and one that even said ‘World’s Best Uncle’, but he proved that sticker right and wore it on his bottle with pride. 

Bucky shrugged, taking a bite from the unhealthily buttered up piece of toast in his hand. “Dunno, man, might be the farmer’s market.” The brunette caught the sulking man out of the corner of his eye and rolled his eyes. “You gotta be kiddin’ me, quit acting like a baby, Rogers. We’ll have plenty of time to get your walk of peace before we have to head in. I didn’t leave the house out three forty-five in the mornin’ for nothing.”

“Right,” he mumbled absentmindedly. It was true, the duo had no business being out at four thirty in morning when they were called for a new twenty-four hour shift at six, but they liked to roam around Brooklyn early in the day. Late September rolled brisk autumn mornings into play in New York, leaves on the trees turning lovely shades of orange and bakeries blending together his favorite aroma into all of their buttery treats- pumpkin. 

And normally he liked being up early too. He enjoyed silence. He (occasionally) enjoyed his best friend’s presence. So it may have been childish, but Steve was quite upset that the 54th Annual Brooklyn Autumn Harvest Festival was loudly interrupting his morning walk. 

They crossed down the center of the street to the walkway of the plaza, taking in the scenery around them. Bucky chewed annoyingly with his mouth open and crushed crunchy, brown leaves under his boots. The night sky still shone through the tall brick buildings and brownstones and trees. 

“Can’t believe you’re up for a promotion to lieutenant, Stevie,” He grinned. “You’re goin’ to the higher ups.”

The blonde scratched the back of his neck bashfully. “Yeah, I guess. Wouldn’t get your hopes up.”

“Hey, don’t say that,” he slapped his friend’s back with a wide open palm, making him wince despite being taller and bigger. “You’re a good man and an even better one for the job. Chief Dubirk knows that.”

“And Chief Dubirk also has his asshole kid running for the position too.” Steve shook with anger. Nothing pissed him off more than Liam Dubirk and his snotty, spoiled, cheating ass. He was a few years younger than Steve himself, but he’d risen through the academy and system quickly and was his greatest competition for lieutenant. Of course, he’d gotten through the ranks quickly through cheating and lying, but his father didn’t know about any of that. And Steve wanted to turn him in. For copping the answers before their exams or for using his father’s money to make deals with other officers for a good word, but the blond wasn’t a snitch. If he couldn’t be Liam Dubirk he was going to be a better man than him. 

He took a sip of his coffee, and now it was tainted with the bitterness of the thought of Liam. “I don’t even know why he’s up for the job, Buck, I’d rather run against you. You’re so much better than Liam.”

His older friend looked over at him with a grimace. “Thanks, Stevie, doesn’t mean much in comparison to that rat, but I appreciate the sentiment.” He clapped his friend on the back. “You know I can’t run for it though. Becca needs me at this age so I’m not gonna be doin’ anything until she's in high school at least.”

“You’re a good father, Buck,” the brunet thanked him. “You’re a much better one than Liam could ever be.”

He groaned. “Jesus Christ, Steve, I know you don’t like him but he doesn’t have to be brought up in every conversation-”

“You’re the only person I can talk to about this, man!” Steve argued. “I mean Sam listens too but he got sick of it ages ago, and Nat won’t even talk to me…”

He droned on and on about Dubirk, arms flailing about as he complained. All up until the hand holding his bottle hit something that wasn’t air. Something solid. 

Bucky watched as a woman fell over with a crate of large sunflowers in her arms. It was in slow motion, her losing balance as Steve’s bottle hit her in the face, then brown, steaming liquid poured down her shirt. But he couldn’t do anything to stop how she crumpled to the concrete ground as Steve’s eyes widened in realization.

“Shit!” A pained groan reached Steve’s ears as he stopped his sentence. Though it was his duty to protect the city (from fires, but also just in general), he couldn’t find it in himself to turn, standing frozen to the ground with his hand now empty a Hydro Flask of coffee. 

Bucky, ever more aware than his best friend, gasped and immediately knelt down to the fallen woman. “Jesus fucking Christ, you can’t stay out of trouble a single time we’re out, Rogers. Last time it was the bar fight today you're killin’ innocent civilians, maybe you shouldn’t be lieutenant with this type of shit on your file.”

“You’re real funny, Buck,” Steve grunted from where he stood. Despite finding a retort to his friend’s jab, he was still rigid as when the Hydro Flask slipped from his fingers. “You ever thought of bein’ a comedian?”

“A few times,” the brunet’s hands went to the woman’s forehead, where a welt was beginning to form at her hairline. “Get down here and help her, Steve, I ain’t cleaning up your messes no more.”

The dramatic James Barnes stood up gracefully and clutched his coffee cup, making sure to show Steve how to hold it so it wouldn’t hit others. “Pardon me, miss,” Steve whacked his friend’s back as he passed by him, “can you say somethin’ for me? Anything’s fine, I just wanna know that you’re alive.”

The woman lay unmoving on the cold concrete, leaves lying around her body like a halo of pretty orange. 

“Shit,” Bucky murmured. He fished his phone out of his pocket, fumbling around with the home button until it unlocked after a few difficult tries. “Goddamn iPhones, still can’t figure out how they fuckin’ work…”

A hand landed on Steve’s tennis shoe and he jumped at the contact. The woman was now moving, a somewhat dazed frown on her face. “Christ, that hurt like a fuckin’ truck,” she groaned. Her arm laid over her eyes to block out the warm light of the streetlamps. “Last thing I needed today.”

Slowly, she eased herself up onto her elbows, an audible crack emerging from her hurt body as she arched her back. “That’s quite the arm you got there, mister,” the woman glanced up, squinting at him but her eyes widened when she saw his biceps. “Or arms, I should say, really.”

The blonde blushed a deep red and attempted to disappear from the world in his leather jacket. His best friend, on the other hand, slapped him in the chest, motioning for him to help the poor, coffee-stained woman up. With some sort of mixture of a squawk and a squeak he knelt down, offering a shaky hand. “Oh my God, I am so, so sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going- you came out of nowhere!” The woman fixed him with a raised brow and he realized his mistake. “N-not that it was your fault! At all, it was all me.” His eyes glanced down to the stain on her blouse and he winced. “Ma’am, I can buy you another shirt- wait no, take mine-”

Without another thought in his naive, little brain, he threw off his leather chestnut jacket and crossed his arms to grab the ends of his plain white tee. He lifted it over his head and the woman couldn’t help but stare in awe as his muscles stretched against his taut skin. She was pissed that he’d spilled coffee all over her blouse on such a stressful morning, but God, if he wasn’t hot.

Bucky, watching the whole scene in front of him, rubbed his eyes tiredly and strolled away from where his best friend was making a stuttering mess of himself. Neither of them were that good around pretty girls, but the difference between the two was that he had a pretty girl at home and Steve was spilling coffee and gaping at one like a fish. “Fuckin’ idiot,” he muttered.

The woman chuckled and brought herself off the ground by herself. Her blouse wasn’t horribly stained- no one could see through the solid black material, but the liquid was cooling in the fabric and it made for an uncomfortable feeling. Steve’s face was still as red as the fire truck he drove around in as he held out his shirt to her. Goosebumps were starting to spread across his bare skin in the light of the fading moon. 

She groaned as she reached forward to grab his shirt. “Thanks,” she began unbuttoning her blouse with no shame and Steve, ever the gentleman, averted his gaze from her chest while she changed, still a bit fazed by the quick series of unfortunate events that he had caused. As she pulled the cotton tee on, a scent of pine came over her like a blanket, and she felt smothering by its woodsy smell. 

“Are you okay?” Steve still looked up to the boring sky, with no stars in sight right next to the city. 

The woman grinned, not that he could see, and tapped his forearm. “I’m decent, you can look now.”

“Oh, thank God, there’s nothin’ going on up there now,” he breathed out. He bent down to grab his leather jacket and pull it over his cold shoulders. For the first time in the five long hours minutes, he felt like he could breathe, coated in the safety of his leather jacket. It also, surprisingly, was the first time he actually made eye contact with the woman he knocked over.

The very pretty woman he knocked over.

The shirt was a bit long on her, dropping down to her knees over the two-toned jeans she wore. It was… certainly a look. Her hair was a bit ruffled from falling over and there was an out of place look on her face but she still stood tall and confident as she stared up at him with an annoyed look on her face.

“Oh, uh, hey,” Steve’s face was burning as he choked out a few words that weren’t you're hot.

She eyed him suspiciously and glanced down to the stained blouse in her hand. “You hit me with your water bottle.”

He looked down and whispered. “It was actually full of coffee.”

“Don’t worry, charmer, I got that,” she waved the bundle of coffee-stained shirt at him and Steve swore he was going to melt into the ground from the embarrassment he was feeling.

“Uh- yeah. Of course.” He should’ve just shut his mouth then. Or run away after he hit her. Either would’ve been better than mortifying himself in front of the pretty girl. “‘M sorry again.”

“‘S okay, my ex got me that blouse, I’ve been meaning to get rid of it,” she joked. She caught the glimmer of a laugh in his eye even though he was still beet-red. “I’m Y/N.”

“Steve,” he finally didn’t mess up his words and instead, stuck out a hand to her. As she shook it she noticed how nicely hers fit in his large, warm palm. She wouldn’t mind feeling it again. “Is it too rude to ask you what you do ‘round here this early in the morning?”

She smirked a little and glanced back at the crate of sunflowers she had dropped minutes before. “I’m a florist. This is our first year at the Brooklyn Autumn Harvest so I got here extra early to make sure everything went well.”

“And then I ran into you,” he continued. She nodded a bit and grinned wider. “‘M sorry again, I’m really a mess.”

“Yeah, you are,” she laughed, “Steve.”

His name sounded so pretty rolling off her tongue. He rather liked it. 

Steve wanted to respond, to ask more about the intriguing woman he’d knocked over but from twenty-five feet behind him, Bucky grunted. He was so entranced by Y/N that he completely forgot that his best friend was there. Consequently, he’d also forgotten that he had to get into the station as well. 

“Rogers,” he grunted, “get her number and get a move on. You wanna make a good impression on Dubirk, no?”

Y/N tapped his arm. “Dubirk is that no good son of a bitch you were complaining about right?”

“Not exactly, I was complainin’ about his son.” Steve paid no mind to the wheeze that escaped his friend behind him as he returned his attention to her. “But you heard that?” 

“Think we all did,” she gestured towards the other workers setting up their stalls. None of them looked over, but he could tell that they were paying attention. He liked to think he had a super-sense in that way. “He sounds like a real knuckle-head.”

Steve chuckled. “He is.”

“Well,” she slipped a pen from the pocket of her baggy jeans and scurried to the crate to grab her notepad. Blue eyes watched intently as she scribbled some numbers and words down onto the paper. “I wouldn’t want you to lose such a high position to a knuckle-head, Lieutenant.” Oh, that really did something to him. “Just give me a call.”

She slipped the paper between his fingers and closed his fist around it. The blond stood dumbfounded at his hand, and glanced up to meet her eyes once more. The pretty florist who he’d nearly given a concussion to. Yet he still couldn’t form words as she left him with a wink and Bucky came to pat him on the back.  

“You ready to go, Stevie?” The duo watched the woman walk away, not knowing she was wearing a smile that stretched on for miles. “You can call her later but she’s never gonna go out with you if you don’t get lieutenant.”

“Shut up,” the blond exited his lovesick trance with a faint grin. He shoved the note into his back pocket, making a mental note to stick it in his locker at the station. As he watched the bottoms of her jeans get stuck under her sneakers he ran a hand through his cropped hair, letting out a low whistle. “I’ve got her number,” he grinned. And nothing mattered more than that.

A year later would find Lieutenant Steve Rogers and his girlfriend talking about their first encounter at their first anniversary. They would regale a chilly September morning and a coffee stained shirt as a brunette man hit his best friend’s shoulder as he commented on what an idiot he was that day. Y/N would sit in Steve’s lap, one of her arms wrapping around his neck so that her fingers could skim the skin of his exposed collarbone as she pressed a deliriously happy grin to the side of his throat. “You’re still a mess, baby.”

And his face would turn beet-red, just like the first time he saw her. 

[not-so-mundane-after-all]

garchel implications aside ( i am sobbing, i am screaming, i am scared ), what are your thoughts on season 4 from what we've seen / know so far???

it looks like we're getting gar, rachel, & dickkory stories ( which. thank GOD ) so what do you think / want to happen?

also the mother mayhem clip kinda reminded me of your purifaction series ngl

I didn't get to fangirl and analyze right after because it was late and I had to get up early for work but you're giving me a perfect opportunity to gather all my thoughts together in one place, thank you.

I am choosing to IGNORE any implications of this shot whatsoever until we get a concrete confirmation (and we better not). I hate the dread this one damn picture caused all over the fandom and overshadowed the hype BUT I'm choosing to remain reasonable and not assume the worst. This picks up literally right after S3 so Rachel has been back for what, 2 days? She's allowed to catch up and cuddle with all her family members, something tells me she will be glued to Dick and Kory as much as she is to Gar here. It doesn't need to mean absolutely anything deeper than that.

And if it does, if they are really going to screw us over like that... Well, we have to prepare. Because I am NOT abandoning my babies, I will keep watching the show even if they are going to shove this thing down my throat. I love this family too much to leave it.

UPDATE:

Teagan confirmed this is platonic. We're safe.

Some things we found out before the panel actually made me really excited. First Brenton confirmed some season 1 villains are coming back + at the panel Greg added to this that death isn't an issue in this case, so I'm hoping for Adamson or Angela and The Nuclear Family.

Then Joseph Morgan said this

And it's REALLY INTERESTING how he only mentions Dick and Rachel specifically. This is giving me hope for some good moments with my father-daughter duo! My mind was overflowing with theories throughout the weekend and if it goes how I'm thinking it might go, it's going to be absolutely GLORIOUS.

(I wish they didn't waste half the panel on talking about Lex and actually discussed Brother Blood instead but it is what it is)

Everything Ryan said about Gar's trauma coming back and how it's a good thing for the character makes me so happy. It's about time this is addressed. It's Ryan's and Gar's time to shine!!!! Also THE SUIT. I am in love with that suit!!!!!

And DICKKORY! Brenton, our King, our Captain, finally pulled through. I love watching that clip, he's blushing like crazy hahahaha. "You're on HBO MAX now" "We're allowed to do some things, yeah" I love that man. It's going to be hot as hell in there!!!!

Now, that fight with Mother Mayhem. She kicks their asses, leaves them licking their wounds - they said that, we've seen that. And as badass as it is to see the team finally together like this, the whole thing seemed pretty... stupid.

Because are they seriously taking turns going at her while there rest just stands and watch? Dick really thought it's a good idea to charge at the woman only with his escrima sticks after two (TWO!) of the most powerful team members got knocked out in seconds? Are they all really that stunned by the fact a magic wielder is attacking them?

So these are my thoughts on what we've seen and learned. I will be watching the panel again after work and maybe come to some other conclusions.

As for what I want to happen?

I hope they won't waste too much time on Lex. We don't need another Crane situation.

I want a lot more family moments, that tight knit vibe. What we got is a pretty good start.

Obviously the most important thing to me here is my father-daughter duo, so I'm gonna say this: I'm expecting some protectiveness right away because for god's sake Rachel passed out after that attack - I better see a concerned father in action.

Also this makes me wonder if this the reason for the whole white hair/no gemstone thing:

Mother Mayhem sucked in everything Rachel gave her in that clip, drained her basically. Will this be the after effect? Ever since I saw those pics I thought something big and painful is going to happen and it will be sudden, but maybe the change is gradual? Her her starts fading, gem either falls out or melts into the skin - and they rush back to Star Labs to get help. We'll see.

Then there's Joseph Morgan saying his "sweet and innocent" Sebastian is on first name basis with Dick and Rachel specifically which makes me think - Dick is going to trust that man with Rachel's wellbeing and he will DEEPLY regret it later.

[bukojuiice]

the way of the househusband — levi ackerman

ೃ pairing: (husband! levi ackerman x  ceo wifey! reader)

ೃ  There is the “ideal” nuclear family. The one composed of a working husband with a well-paying 9 to 5 job, loving housewife who cooks and cleans, and adoring children who do well in school. However, that idealization is looong gone. What about you and your family? You are the CEO of a Tech Start-up Company who ain’t no trophy wife, Your husband hails from the last line of Ackermans and who temporarily resigns from being a vice executive of your company (just because he doesn’t want to work with young, feeling philanthropist, and genius GenZers) to become a hands-on househusband, and then there’s your little daughter who has the most inquisitive mind and adventurous heart who idolizes her doting father in every shape, way, and form. A month’s absence in your home (due to a business trip) could lead to many many things. But, your husband randomly publishing a self-help book on parenting and being a househusband is not one of those things. 

ೃ genre and warnings: modern au, domestic fluff, baby au, husband au, 

ೃ  my nav  →  my aot masterlist

ೃ 4k words

ೃ Will be referring to hanji as “aunkling” (a cute nickname that some kiddos use to refer to their non-binary relatives <3) because there are no official non-binary terms for aunt and uncle! + your daughter with levi is named amelia and she is just the most precious cinnamon roll

It’s done. 

The Business Trip is finally over.

A long and painful month of no hugs and playdates with your little princess, Amelia and no time to be pampered with love and affection from your husband, Levi was finally over!

Sometimes, you wonder how you were even able to survive these long-ass trips and conferences. Sure, these month-long trips only happened once a year, but the thought of Amelia getting older and having to miss a day of seeing her grow up and discover the world, really hurt you as all mothers would. Video Calls were enough to satisfy you and give you happy hormones even for just a short while, but still- the longer you’re not with them, the more the yearning lengthens until you’re just riddled with endless thoughts of wanting to get home as soon as possible.

First, let’s set things straight: You are the CEO of a Tech Start-up company who was born into a middle-class family and rose her way up to success. It’s as cliche as it gets but hey! Living a life as if you were in a romantic comedy was the best compliment you’ve ever gotten. 

Along with that, as far as rich families in rom-coms and coming of age movies go, are they all dysfunctional in reality? Not really. Or at least you and Levi promised each other not to end up like that. The Rich Girl meets Poor Boy (with a tragic backstory) cliche however? Yea, that’s a pretty accurate way to describe your love story. Meeting the love of your life in a Coffee Shop is actually pretty common and happens to a lot of people apparently. When Erwin Smith, Levi’s best friend (who is too smart and self-aware to fit the role of a rom-com sidekick by the way) approaches your table to ask if he and Levi could sit with you. (Because of all the days the cafe would be packed, it would be that day.) You said yes of course, and Erwin began oversharing details about the raven-haired man and you were all too invested in learning more about him anyway. Levi grew up in the orphanage after his mother had died and his father was the biggest asshole on the planet for never showing his face, he had to fend for himself after he outgrew the foster system. Starting out as an espionage in an illegal underground gambling empire to a bookkeeper at the Smiths’ bookshop. (Although this is a story for another day)  

Internally swooning over his pretty eyes and resting bitch face...it didn’t take long until the two of you fell in love and... the rest was history!

You come home to your lavish yet homey apartment in 21 West End Avenue Manhattan to be surprised by your father-daughter duo absolutely knocked out on the couch. Amelia was snuggled up to her father, her feet on his lap and a sleeping position you could not possibly comprehend, a Disney movie playing in the background, and both of them were wearing matching Minion onesies whilst yours was folded neatly on the coffee table just waiting to be worn by you when you got home. 

It was a rare sight to see and you can’t help but just stare lovingly at the wonderful scene before you. Not only was it rare to see Amelia asleep before seeing you (or in the case of your business trips, during your daily video calls with them) but it was also rare to see your husband sleeping so soundly and his insomnia not kicking in. 

Amelia hears your footsteps, her eyes are still shut as she tries to predict what you will do next. She finally assesses when she will make her move and surprise you when you place another fleece blanket on top of them and plant a kiss on both of their temples. your daughter’s eyes suddenly flutter open. Her eyes beaming and glowing off the same light that twinkled in her father’s as she jumps off the couch, making sure not to wake up Levi.

“MOMMY!” She screams in the most quiet volume her cute voice could muster. She runs up to you and envelops you in a tight hug, jumping up and down as she does so. “I missed you Mommy! I missed you soooo much! How was sandbox in K-korea!? Was there a lot of sand!? Did you have a lot of pwaymates there!?”

You giggle at your daughter’s enthusiasm, combing your fingers through her hair. “Lili, Sandbox is like the Silicon Valley of Korea. It isn’t necessarily a sandbox like in a playground, baby.”

“OOOH! JUST LIKE SIWICON VAWWEY!” She chirps, tightening her hug and reaching for your hand and squeezing it. “AH WAIT!” She gently pushes you away and makes a beeline to her room. “ME AND DADDY HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU! BUT CLOSE YOUR EYES FIRST OWKAAY?!” She calls out from her room and you shout back a “yes!” to her in between your giggles, unable to contain the sudden rush of serotonin your daughter had given you from her simple yet adorable antics.

Another trope that you can debunk is that rich moms can be a hands-on parent too! After your maternity leave ended and when Amelia had finally reached her toddler years, you absolutely made sure that you were going to take care of her every second, minute, hour and day of your life. As soon as she turned two, she became the inquisitive, smart and ever so curious little girl you and Levi had always hoped for. She had your (h/c) hair and Levi’s icy yet warm and loving milky grey eyes. If the color of Levi’s reminded you of dark and stormy clouds, Amelia’s was gleaming. Like that of the clouds after a terrible storm. She was an absolute blessing and although you weren’t a perfect mother, (spoiling her more than you should) Levi was an amazing father. Growing up without parents was tough for him and he was going to make sure that Amelia is going to have an amazing childhood and be surrounded by the love of two parents that he never had and never got to experience. 

You always and will forever have trust in Levi. There has never been a day where you doubted him. Despite the impressions and assumptions that people have of him. How he was cold, scary, and even calculating. But, you are always quick to shut down those rumors. They don’t know the Levi Ackerman behind the cold and mighty front he shows. He is a man who has gone through so much and yet has so much love and care to give. How he notices and remembers the littlest details, how he never takes anything for granted and how he loves and cherishes everything so wholeheartedly.

When Amelia turned six, you sadly had to go back to work formally. Right timing too because your genius (with very himbo tendencies) younger cousin, Eren, was about to be part of your start-up company and he had a lot of amazing plans that had to come into fruition. Even bringing in a group of his own friends (who all graduated in MIT by the way!) who are willing to contribute so many amazing ideas and hackathons that were just waiting to happen.

The entrance of these youthful and hopeful genius entrepreneurs also brought about the temporary exit of your very own husband from your very own company. Apparently, working with newly graduated Gen Zers (as a millennial) was too much for him. They were nice and they were going to be a very integral part of the company. But, the boomer inside Levi can’t just can’t keep up with this sudden surge of energy and youthfulness within the higher-ups. It was also a great opportunity for him to take care of Amelia even more. So, you didn’t stop him from doing so! 

It’s been a year since he temporarily resigned and became an official-unofficial househusband. Or as your best friend Hanji likes to put it, You are the Girl Boss and he is the Male Wife. Amelia is now 7 years old and she’s currently taking Ballet classes (Levi picks her up during the weekdays, and the both of you pick her up on the weekends) and has developed a hyperfixation over Sanrio Characters and the Disney movie, Frozen. She was growing up to be a wonderful girl and you just can’t wait to hear what she and Levi had done during your absence.

She skips her way back to you, a book tightly clutched in her hands. “SURPRISE!” Amelia gingerly places a book on your hand. You open your eyes and tilt your head in question at the piece of literature she had just given you as you read the title aloud.  “The Way of the House Husband… written by Levi Ackerman.” Your eyes shift to a little circle on the lower side of the cover,  “The husband of (Y/N) Ackerman, the CEO of Survey Corp Tech…!?” 

“Daddy and I made a book while you were away!” She claps her hands together and grabs the book back from you, turning it to the first page. “See there’s even a dedication! To (Y/N) and Amelia! The two brightest stars in my galaxy!”

“Oh that’s too cheesy. No way would your dad write something like this out of the blue, Lili.” You scoff, shaking your head in disbelief. Your daughter looks at you with downcast eyes while you were still trying to process that your husband literally just wrote a whole-ass book while you were away. “Who helped publish this so quickly, Amelia?”

“Uncle Erwin of course!” She’s frowning for one second and now she’s beaming at you again. “Please please read it mommy! Me and daddy worked really really hard on it!” She taps the hardbound cover of the book in rhythms. “This is the Amelia Edition! Daddy said he cut out some stuff so that it would be okay for me to read and for me to give to you once you get home! It’s my come back home gift for you mommy!” She moves the book to your lap and hops up next to you on the loveseat that you were sitting on. Before you know it, Amelia is resting her head on your shoulder and coaxing you to start reading to her like it was a bedtime story. 

You clear your throat and hold her by the waist so that she can feel more secure in her seat. “Okay… okay… let’s begin shall we? In a kingdom far far away…”

“That’s not how the book is like mommy! Read it properly like the way daddy did!”

“I was just joking, honey. Let’s get started. Rule #1 of the House Husband is…”

Rule #1: Fathers, be good to your children. You are the weight of their world.

“One thing I learned as soon as I was at home practically 24/7 is that your child will be more cautious and weary of you. They will observe you because they look up to you. They will watch your every move, follow you around, and will imitate whatever you say and whatever they hear from you. Talk to them, teach them things they need to know, support them in their hobbies, interests, and even if you have to be the extra princess in her tea party, do it.  The thing is, you will leave an eternal mark on the hearts of your children.”

Amelia got even more closer to Levi when he was finally stationed at home. Always grinning from ear to ear and boasting to her classmates how cool her dad was whenever he would pick her up from school. She was proud to tell them Levi’s heritage even if Amelia never got to meet her Grandma Ackerman and Grandpa Ackerman. When Levi would take her out for errands, may they be groceries, cleaning the house, baking, cooking, laundry, or just going on his morning jog, Amelia would be there to accompany him. In fact, she’s gone shopping with Levi so many times that she has memorized the brand names of cleaning detergent and bleach before she could even memorize the multiplication table.

 She’s even caught up with her father’s cynical sense of humor. And because of that, Levi had to tone down on his sardonic jokes around the little girl. Levi wasn’t necessarily physically affectionate but he does soften around Amelia as the little girl never fails to supply him with endless hugs and kisses on the cheek. She may be both a Mommy’s and Daddy’s girl, but the way she looks up to Levi is the kind of father-daughter bond that you hardly see in real life. She aspires to be like him. Even if there were times where she would be scolded by you both, (most especially Levi) she never took that against you.  She sees all the good and positive sides of your husband that others outside of your circle fail to see.

Rule #2: Let your children know that they have other “guardian angels” who they can rely on aside from their parents.

“My daughter has both my wife and I’s best friends to learn from or to look up to. Her kooky aunkling and her blunt uncle have become one of the most precious people in her life. Even the young ins working at Survey Corp Tech have become older siblings to her and get along with her so well. Remember that there will always be close relatives or friends who can and will help them when they lose their way. Let them spread sunshine and love to others.”

Whether it’s a regular trip to Coney Island or your monthly trips to Disneyland, Hanji or Erwin would totally tag along. Amelia absolutely loves and vibes with Hanji’s quirkiness so well. They would wear matching Mickey Mouse ears, ride the kiddie roller coaster that Amelia wanted to ride on a million times per visit, buy her all the ice cream and treats she wants (despite Levi’s warnings and the reprimanding that Hanji has to suffer from the both of you right after.) They just want Amelia to experience all the fun, the joy, and innocence of living in the moment. As a kid, it’s better if she sees how precious life is, how she should cherish it and that she doesn’t have to grow up so fast just yet. 

Erwin on the other hand, brought out Amelia’s intellectual side more. As soon as a new and critically acclaimed children’s book hit the shelves, you bet Amelia has a copy right away. Whenever Levi would take her to Erwin’s bookstore, she wanders around like it’s this huge mysterious archive that can only be accessed by her. The Adults section is forbidden, so were the cheap romance novels in the back, and the books written by youtubers. God forbid she read those. When her Uncle Erwin got her into reading Roald Dahl’s children’s books, you had to watch Amelia run around the penthouse with a little red ribbon tied on top of her hair, wanting to be referred to as Matilda, along with you and Levi having to pretend that she had telekinetic powers for 6 months straight. It was her cutest phase yet and you just know there were many more to come. 

There were also Eren and his friends who loved Amelia dearly whenever she came over to visit. Your little cousin refused to be called Uncle Eren and instead wanted to be called big bro, and in which Amelia happily complied. Whenever it was Amelia’s weekly “Visit Mommy at Work” day, she had her own room in your office where Eren and your other young associates would babysit her. In fact, they would actually take turns in babysitting at your condo whenever you and Levi went out for date night. Amelia was introduced to playing video games like Animal Crossing and Pokemon solely because of them (more specifically because of big bro Jean, big sis Sasha, and big bro connie.) They even ended up influencing her to watch anime when her big brother “Minmin” and big sis “Mimi” accidentally left the TV on and Amelia literally binge-watched half of the existing Studio Ghibli movies to this date. 

Rule #3: Your children will think that you are Superman or Iron Man. Make sure to act like them and never let them down by ruining their innocence and imagination.”

(A little note was attached to this page: Please don’t let Amelia read this. Read her a fairy tale instead while skimming through this.)

“It all started when my daughter found an entire encyclopedia on ancient and legendary family clans around the world. The Ackerman clan was on the very first page after the intro and she read through all 50 pages of it. The look of awe on her face when she read that her dad’s ancestors exhibit physical abilities much higher than the average human. In a 7 year old’s mind and vocabulary, that automatically translates to a superhero akin to that of Superman. 

Ever since then, My daughter has forced me to become more creative with doing very mundane tasks and chores. I pretend to have superpowers. Such as teleporting around the house whilst cleaning. I tell her to close her eyes or else my teleportation powers won’t work. Then when I cook in the kitchen and she watches me intently, I tell her that the salt and pepper have magical properties that only I can touch and hold because to her, at that moment, I was “Doctor Stwange.”

and one time, when I picked her up from school, she was babbling on about how she told her friends and playmates that she had two superhero parents she was very proud of. Then one of the other kids asked if I was a strong soldier who killed huge humanoid monsters using sharp blades. To which I replied that could have possibly happened in a different universe. Her hearty laughs and giggles whenever she sees me using my superpowers makes me anxious over the fact I have to tell her someday that my powers never existed.”

Whilst you were on your monthly trip, you and Levi would have private video calls whenever Amelia was finally put to bed. There, he told you about what happened in Amelia’s ballet classes that week and how the single mothers were more persistent than usual.

They could clearly see that Levi was not interested but apparently the fact that your husband waving his ring finger every single time someone approached him wasn’t obvious enough, apparently the fact that he was married made the risk even more worth it to these prying moms who had nothing better to do. It wasn’t until Amelia had enough and respectfully called them out by saying that his dad was married and he was never going to be interested in Karens (a slang word that she learned from Eren and friends) Since then, the invasion of parent to parent boundaries had finally stopped. Levi was very relieved and at ease whilst telling you the story yet you were laughing your heart out at the ingenious remarks of your very own daughter on top of the irresistible charm and looks of your own husband that made single mothers be damned. 

Rule #4: The most important rule of all: Love your spouse as you want your children to be loved in the future.

“Since my wife is on a business trip right now as I type this and she may or may not know that I had written this book for her to read when she comes home, my daughter came up to me a few days ago and told me how she missed her mom so much. The video calls we had every night were not enough to satisfy her for the remaining days her mother would be gone. She then proceeds to tell me that she loves the way I love (Y/N). My daughter loved how patient I was and how I supported her through every endeavor that her mother had ever thought up with that brilliant mind of hers. She mentioned how I was there for her through every success and failure, through hardships, difficulties and misunderstandings. My daughter was happy because I stuck with her mother through everything. All the pain, suffering, conflicts that we both experienced individually and as husband and wife. Little ears and little eyes are watching and observing the actions and sweet gestures of their parents. Make sure to remember that.”

“What is gravy (grief) if not love persevewing?” (persevering) My daughter had even recounted a quote from the Disney Marvel show, WandaVision just to prove a point to me. That was when I realized something and decided to list down a few things: 

1. The best lovers are the best of friends.

Levi’s relationship with you was rocky at first simply because the two of you didn’t have a lot in common. Your personalities clashed and the two of you could barely make things work in the beginning. He was always well-dressed, on time, and was very prim and proper. However, Levi was cold, strict, and unapproachable. You on the other-hand were quite the opposite. You used to arrive late, didn’t care too much about your style as long as you wore the appropriate outfit, but you were carefree, laidback and friendly. Having to set aside your differences was a process that required sacrifice, time, and effort. It took long and a lot of petty arguments before the two of you fully understood each other, accepted each other's faults and quirks, and became even closer. Both as friends and lovers. You and Levi treat each other not as just the “person I love and I’m married to for the rest of my life”, but also as a best friend for life. Soulmates

2. Their dreams are just as important as yours.

Levi’s dream was to open up a tea shop and start a family with you. That was all he ever wanted. The blissful simplicity of his in comparison to your techy and out of this world ambitions, goes to show how much they weigh as aspirations and wants in life. You have to value your significant other’s dreams and ambitions just as much as you highly value yours. No matter how hard or how simple they are, the both of you can achieve it with the help of each other. The only thing left in your agenda was to open up his long-awaited Tea Shop. You were about to surprise him with the plans of opening one up on the day of his birthday, and you just can’t wait for that day to finally come.

3. You have to let them be free.

Levi absolutely knew what he was getting into when he met you. It was love at first sight when he met you, He drunkenly admitted that one time when he’s had too much champagne on your friday date night. He knew that you were an adventurer. A wandering soul who had a goal and a purpose set in stone. He always knew you were going to reach greater heights and he knew that you would never leave him behind and would always have him go on a ride. He’s always known about your capabilities and your potential and he didn’t want you to stray away from that. And, if the time were to come that you had to leave him behind to soar greater heights, he’d understand that. He’d always let you be free and make sure you don’t fly too close to the sun. That was just how selfless Levi is. The thing is, he knows you would do the same for him. It was a perfect balance. 

4. It is an honor to love and to be loved by them.

To be wrapped in the arms of someone who feels like home or has become the definition of home, To be stargazing with on a chilly summer night in where you talk about your future and your plans, To be sharing a cup of coffee or tea with in the morning and begrudgingly dancing with you against his will, To be watching your child playing in her room and do nothing but look adoringly at the most precious soul to have ever been produced by your encompassing love, and to be spending the rest of your life with someone who has done nothing but be with you through every pivotal moment in your life was such an honor. 

It is an honor to be loved by Levi, as he is honored to be loved by you. 

“...The end.” You close the book with a deep but contented sigh. Tears were welling up in your eyes and you’re trying your best not to break down in front of Amelia. 

“Mommy… are you crying?” She tilts her head in inquiry. “Is it because you’re tired from work?”

“No. baby. These are happy tears, Lili. Don’t worry.”

Before you could speak up once more, you notice Levi had slowly sprung up from the couch, and began to stretch his arms. His eyes widen when he sees you from the opposite couch. “(Y/N)... you were supposed to arrive at 6 AM right? Amelia and I were supposed to pick you-”

Amelia opens her mouth to speak as she jumps down from the couch and crawls up to sit next to Levi. “Daddy! I showed Mommy the book you wrote! She loved it! Right, Mommy?”

“You did?” Your husband perks up from his seat, clearing his throat. “T-that’s not the entire book yet by the way. We had to give back the original copies to Erwin for reprinting. The self-help book is currently rising up the charts to be a New York Times Best Seller.” 

Before Levi could properly react, you move to the free space on the couch next to him. Holding his hand and gazing into his forlorn yet loving eyes, you muttered. “Love, that’s amazing. I’m really really proud of you. Next time though, please do tell me that you’ve written a self-help book and dethroned all those mommy authors from the bestselling charts.” 

Levi stifles a laugh, stroking your thumb and bringing you and Amelia closer to him for warmth. “I will. I will.” 

Amelia looks up at the two of you, squeezing out of the sandwich, so that you and Levi can have your quality time with each other. “Goodnight Mom! Goodnight Dad!” She approaches the two of you so that she can be given her nightly kiss on the cheek as she retreats to her room. 

“What if I write a novel too?” You joke, snuggling up to Levi, your husband wrapping his arm around you. “The title could be… The way of the Wife boss?” 

“That could be a good sequel. A shared book universe. Then, Amelia could continue the collection when we’re old and sour as hell.” Levi mused.

“Pfft. I guess only time will tell. I love you Levi.”

“I love you too (Y/N).”

[forever-rogue]

Idk if you’re still taking Bucky requests, but I came across a quote and I feel in love with it because it just screamed Bucky to me. It read: “there is nothing as beautiful as seeing someone who has been unlucky, finally being loved so effortlessly by the right person” if this sparks anything in you, I would love to read it 💜

Pairing | Bucky x Fem!Reader

Word Count | 1.9k

Warnings | dad!Bucky, slight language, slight suggestive theme

Masterlists | Bucky, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Bucky bit back a yawn as he closed the car door and headed towards the front door. The smell of spring, the freshly mowed grass and blooming flowers overwhelmed his senses along with the warm summer sun hitting his skin. This was nice, he realized, the calculated simplicity and domestic nature of it all. He hiked his bag on his shoulder, the gold in his vibranium arm glinting brilliantly in the slowly dying light of the day. He didn’t bother to hide it anymore, somehow long past that part of his life. At one point he never thought he’d reach that point in his life and now he had the world in front of him. 

Walking up the stairs, he smiled to himself as he could already smell something delicious cooking through the open windows. In a vain attempt to keep the household from falling into complete and utter chaos, he slowly opened the door and tried to tip-toe inside. He managed to get about two feet inside and kick off his work boots before he heard an exciting squeal followed by a few loud woofs. 

The pitter-patter of two small feet and four paws quickly reached him as Falcon, the trusted family dog, and Emily, your oldest daughter, ran down the hall towards him. Any stress he had remaining quickly melted away at the sight of two of his favorite beings as they almost knocked him over in their rush. 

“Daddy!” an excited shout was followed by another bark. He bent down and scooped the small girl in his arms, the weight of the world off his shoulders as she wrapped her little arms around his neck, “hi daddy, you’re home!”

“Of course I am,” he propped her on his hip and studied her sweet little face. She took after him with his dark unruly hair and ocean eyes, but the rest he swore was all you, especially that sweet smile, “I’ll always come home to my sweetest girl. Did you have a good day, baby?”

“Yeah,” she nodded excitedly as he brushed her hair out of her face and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, “mama and I painted and then we planted some new flowers. She said she picked them out because they reminded her of you!”

“She did, did she?” he couldn’t stop the grin that spread from ear to ear as his heart fluttered in his chest. Even to this day you still managed to make him weak in the knees and set off butterflies in his belly. He held Emily tightly in his grip as he bent down to give Falcon a few pets, causing the dog to rub against his legs as he wagged his tail, “what would I do without my little hellraisers?”

“Mama says that’s a bad word!” Emily looked at him with wide eyes and he chuckled softly before holding a finger to his lips.

“It’s our little secret,” he whispered as she nodded, “do you know why this secret is okay?”

“Because it’s not gonna hurt anyone,” she asked as he nodded. She gave him a wide gap toothed grin as he set her back down, “will you play with me later, daddy? Falcon wants to have a tea party!”

“Of course,” he promised his daughter as she held tightly onto his hand, “now go and get cleaned up for dinner. It smells like it should all be done soon.”

“Okie dokie,” she dropped his hand and motioned for Falcon to follow her instead, practically bouncing up the stairs. 

Bucky sighed in content as he shook his head before slowly making his way into the kitchen where he was sure you were. He found at the island, brows furrowed in concentration as you chopped vegetables for the salad. Your baby boy was slung around your chest, and despite the commotion from Bucky’s entrance, he was fast asleep. A lump welled up in his throat as he watched the sight. It would be nothing special to most people, but to him it was everything.

You looked so beautiful, even in your sweatpants and t-shirt with your hair a chaotic bun as you hummed to the baby under your breath. You looked tired and he felt bad for a moment; leaving you with a toddler and a baby was a ton of work and he would have gladly stayed home with you and helped, but you were insistent that he work if he wanted. You’d never hold it against him, he knew that.

As soon as you sensed you his presence in the kitchen, you turned to him and gave him a soft smile, and his own features softened even more, “hello, my love. I’m so glad you’re so home!”

You set down the knife before slowly making your way over to him, careful not to disturb the baby as he immediately leaned down to kiss you. Your whole body was practically humming from his touch as you stole you a few more kisses, “rough day? You should have called me and I could have come home, honey baby.”

“It wasn’t bad actually,” you promised, watching with nothing but adoration in your eyes as he stroked Stevie’s chubby little cheek, “the chaos duo was on their best behavior today and the little one has been sleeping most of the day. I think he wore himself out from all his fussing last night.”

“Miracles do happen,” he laughed lightly as his hand went to your face and he gently stroked your cheek. You grinned at him, keening into his touch like a cat to the sun, “you are so beautiful.”

“Shut up,” you playfully pushed his chest before hiding your face behind your hands. Funny, how even after all this time he still managed to make you feel nervous and shy, “I’m in my ugliest mom clothes which I’m pretty sure these sweats have permanent puke stains, I haven’t showered today and I look like I haven’t slept in five years. Hardly beautiful.”

“You are the most gorgeous woman I have ever laid eyes on regardless of all of that,” he insisted softly, reaching for your hands and pulling them away from your face. Your whole body flushed with pleasant warmth as you looked into his eyes, “and I love you more than anything in this world.”

“You’re just saying that ‘cause I let you knock me up twice,” you joked as he playfully rolled his eyes, “god, Bucky, how do you still make me feel like this?”

“Like what?” he asked as he slowly moved to undo the sling from your chest and take the baby from you. Stevie made a few small sounds before cuddling up on Bucky’s chest. 

“Like I’m still falling in love with you every day,” you whispered as you leaned in and let him wrap arm around you as well. He kissed the top of your head before sighing in content, “I guess I am. We’re a little different every day - we’re definitely not the same fools from when we first met, huh?”

“I mean, we’re married and have kids, and the whole you know, typical suburban thing going on,” he teased, “so I’d say we’re pretty different. But you’re still my favorite pain in the ass.”

“James!” your eyes widened before the two of you broke into a fit of giggles, “I will get you back for that later!”

“Oh, I definitely count on it,” he promised, “now, go and take a few moments to yourself, shower or whatever, and I’ll finish dinner and get the kiddos and Falcon settled.”

“Whatever would I do without you, my love?”

“I think the better question is what would I do without you, honey baby?”

You blew him a little kiss as you all but ran towards the stairs in order to fit in a quick shower. Sometimes even ten minutes of peace and quiet would suffice. Bucky watched you go with a soft smile on his face, before turning his attention back to his softly cooing son, “your mama’s the best person in this entire world, I hope you always know that.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“What?” you could feel Bucky’s eyes on your back as you brushed your teeth in the bathroom en suite. He was sitting in bed, winding down with some television as he waited for you, “I can feel you checking out the goods, Barnes.”

“That’s because I am,” you could practically hear the cheeky smirk in his voice, “it’s not wrong to admire, is it?”

“You’re too much,” you dried your face off before making your way back over to him. He offered you a lazy smile as he pulled back your side of the blankets and made room for you. You were only wearing his shirt and a pair of old cotton panties but he was watching you like you were the best in this world. Because to him - you were. The end all and be all, “James? What’s wrong, honey?”

“Nothing,” he whispered as he immediately reached for you and gently pulled you into his lap. You made a small sound of surprise but easily gave into his touch, “nothing at all. I’m perfect.”

“Hmm,” you leaned in and pressed a light kiss to his plump lips, gently tugging on his dog tags, “me too. I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this, but I kind of like you a lot.”

“Is that why you married me? Had two kids with me? Got the dog?” he raised a brow as you carded a hand through his dark locks, scratching lightly at his scalp, “I bet it was all for the dog.”

“He didn’t hurt,” you joked, gently stroking his cheek, “but you aren’t so bad either. I love you, Bucky. So much. I hope you know. I hope you know you deserve this, everything we have - the whole world.”

“I…” he paused for a moment, suddenly feeling overwhelmed as you showed him so much tenderness and delicate love, “I love you too.”

“Hey,” you put your hand under your chin and turned his face up towards yours, “I mean it James Buchanan Barnes. You have been through so much, so much that other people forced on you, and you deserve happiness. You deserve all the happiness this world has to offer. I know you have some bad days, and I understand that, but I want you to know I will always be here for you and I will always love you. You are my best friend, my husband, the father of my children, you are my everything.”

“I don’t deserve you,” he took your hand in his and pressed a gentle kiss to your knuckles.

“Yes,” you insisted softly, “you do, James.”

“I-”

“How about for one moment you hush up,” you pushed him back against the headboard and pressed a few gentle, lazy kisses to his lips, “and just listen to me. And let me love you.”

“I love you, honey baby.”

“I love you too, James.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

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[ctntduoarchive]

Hope you don’t mind me ranting a bit about this but a hunger games au is actually super interesting and fitting for dsmp :D

Like cWilbur as Katniss for the most part, yknow with the whole bow and arrow (although he’s like average at it) and the thing about your younger sibling having blonde hair and sticking out because of the hope they give other people… and also volunteering for their place when their name is picked because you couldn’t bear at the thought of a world without them

Phil too, also a strong source of hope in his day and forever jaded from the trauma of being the district’s only successor- tried his best but never could have been the father Wilbur needed. But when Wilbur volunteers he immediately kicks into the mindset of the games, it’s the best thing he ever succeeds in.

He develops a full on scheme to give Wilbur the best chances he’s got for the games, by purposefully coming down with a nasty illness that’s highly contagious and violent (they wouldn’t get far if he faked it) and with his status, is able to choose who takes his place as Wilbur and nikis mentor (oh yeah and niki, the bakers daughter, gets choosen too) in the rearrangement and immediately chooses Techno, one of the spare mentors from the district that specializes in training peacekeepers and an old friend of Phil’s. And like that’s just the first part of the plan

The overall plan is to finally get a foot in the door to undermining the capital, something Phils been waiting for years and years and so had techno. And Phil has no doubt that Wilbur can light that spark in others. However the key factor is making sure Wilbur plays the game right in winning over the people’s favor, which is kinda the crux of the first part, as he’s up against difficult competitors like Quackity and Schlatt in higher up districts.

Meanwhile, Tommy convinces Phil to be in on the entire plan, And him and Ranboo are actively working out ways to add fuel to that spark Wilbur starts (tubbo’s actually in a different district and is called into the games too, cause I love him too much to not traumatise him and then have my hurt/comfort cabinet duo moments)

Sorry this is super long but it just got me excited thinking all the ways things could connect in the Au and I just had to share it akdkfk

yes!!! this would be super fun!!!

i also had this personal hunger games au where ctommy becomes a tribute BUT his best friend (ctubbo) is taken to the capitol . because they make a massive scene at the reaping and the capitol ALWAYS are in it for the dramatics

who he gets stuck with in the hunger games i am yet to think about! thinking about someone like cranboo, who he finds annoying at first but eventually they become friends!

and then ctubbo is placed right next to the leader (president, emperor, i forgot what they called it) cschlatt! he learns the ins and outs of the capitol, also becoming close with cschlatt's fiancé (for show) cquackity .

MEANWHILE . cwilbur is stuck in district 12 but is desperate to get them back! so his stupid ass thinks about how to get to the capitol and somehow discovers the underground network that's planning a revolution (the one that's introduced in book 2 i think it is!)

so then by the end cwilbur and whoever else is running the revolution break ctommy and subsequently cranboo out of the arena, THEN go to the capitol to break in .

the three of them and whoever i decide would be important from the revolution, sneak around the capitol looking for ctubbo. they spot him one day on the big screen next to cschlatt and cquackity.

once they finally locate him irl, he insists on bringing cquackity with him, much to cwilbur's distrustful ass' dismay .

he then breaks out into an argument with ctubbo (and learns he knows how to fend for himself now! he's had massive character development!) and they alert all the guards

SOMEHOW they manage to all get out . thats as far as i've gotten

[dreamwritesimagines]

“But the aftermath of the dispute? That you had not known about, until now.” yeah.....nope, that’s not common either you effin rabbits LMAO. i’m kidding, good on them but now TALK! “You were sleeping very heavily.” OH SHUT UP LAKSLKAS stop he’s so smug i hate him. NOT THE SCRATCH MARKS ALSKALKS. these Obsessed Harlots™️ oh my gosh they really did Get It On™️ last night huh jfc. they need a jug of holy water if i’m honest.  “I am very much pleased with myself,” of course you are. you’re not called Anthony Whore™️ Bridgerton for nothing lmao. “I won’t mind fights if they end the way they did last night.” further proves my precious statement akslaks he’s still so smug about it even paragraphs later lmao. but gosh, the latest Whistledown honestly just annoyed me but lol gossip is gossip and never had it ever been the truth.

“Until then there is something we must talk of, now that you mentioned implications.” THANK U. FINALLY. “There’s not a fight in the world that can make me stop loving you.” SEE WHAT I MEAN WHEN THEY WOULD JUST TALK. good things comes to those who Communicate™️ !!! and also, i’m actually so impressed with Anthony here alskaslk i mean it’s the bare minimum i know and i know he’s always been mature, he had to grow up early unfortunately. but he’s being so open and patient and reassuring and just very Adult™️ like he’s the one instigating that they should talk about it instead of sweeping it under the rug. and he doesn’t mind reminding Cherie that he loves her, and that night was just one mistake that will never happen again AND i’m sure he won’t hesitate to remind her over and over until it sticks.

“I will never break your heart again. No matter how many arguments or fights we have. Your heart is in good hands my love. I will make sure of that every day for the rest of my life.” MY HEAAAAAAART “I’m sorry.” i’m so fucking happy i actually could cry. THE BABIES ARE GROWING UP. MATURITY & CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT WE LOVE TO SEE IT <;3 “That will never happen to us. You will never even hear the word divorce from me.” awwww look at them <333 who knew all they needed was to let out that steam with some Good Angry Sex™️ so they can have that sweet sweet talk afterwards <3 alskalsk

“Do you need Lucie right now?” aaah Iona you precious bean. she deserves to have her moment with Lucie. they’re so cute <;3 “They both spent the night at the Trenlove household.” i am both worried and intrigued. “Seething in anger, and yet he remains quiet about it as if nothing happened.” i can’t explain it, but this really really sounds soooo much like Percy lmao. it’s Percycore™️ to act unbothered even if he’s not.

“Asked not to be disturbed, but that does not apply to us. Go ahead.” LMAO I LOVE THAT. i love Aunt Lavinia so much, she literally kicks ass and takes no shit and she lets her brother know that he might be a duke or whatever, but she’s still in charge. ALSO THE WAY CHERIE AND PERCY GREETED EACH OTHER WAS SO CUTE. i’m so happy that their father-daughter bond is growing strong <;3 “You’ve read Whistledown.” omg lol i keep forgetting that Percy is always ALWAYS in with the gossip too lmao. add secret gossiper in the Percycore™️ list

“Yesterday morning. When he came here for Elias.” AWWW PERCY AND ANTHONY BOND <3 i need more of this duo i swear they’d be so powerful together.

“That was the reason why she danced with me for the first time, she wanted to see what made me tick.” awww :// my Perssandra heart </3 they would’ve been so so good together. “She knew more about me than I care to admit by the time the dance was over.” or perhaps you immediately felt intrigued and Enamored™️ by her from the very start, prolly even safe that it made you open up without realizing maybeeee??? tbh i’d read a whole novel of Perssandra even if it ends in tragedy alkslkas

“Do you want to guess what he would do to the person he hates?” thank u Percy. always my voice of reason aslkaslakls. you and Elias are really helping my sanity here LMAO. “Perhaps you and Anthony should go back to Aubrey Hall, finish the season earlier.” but we want the juicy drama Percy! come on! imagine if Cherie told him that if they did do that, he’d have a grandchild before the season ends. he’d have a heart attack lakslaks

“But you’re not alone in this, do you hear me? Whatever we do, we do it as a family and we will make sure we’re unharmed in this.” *clears throat* we’re all in this together sorry sorry alskalska but he’s so right and he should say it. they’re such a powerful family if you really think about it. like their skills and knowledge just go together so well.

“But he didn’t force me to apply the parliament for divorce, did he? That was all my doing.” AW NO PERCY stop this is making me sad :(((( he’s still living with that guilt after all these years. and it hurts to think that he probably always will until the end of his days. bc he’s not really wrong either. it was the lack in trust he had with Cassie that broke her at the end of the day. sure, Frederick was Cassie’s childhood friend i think it was, of course it hurt that he’d started all those rumors. but i don’t think it would’ve compared to just how painful it was when Percy himself started believing it. “It was my actions that put your mother through hell at the end of the day.” see what i meaaan. ugh we love a man who takes responsibility of his own actions. “She didn’t blame you.” // “She should have.” STOP MY HEART UGH. but Cherie is so sweet about it tho. and she’s also right, Percy doesn’t need to be so hard on himself. he did try to make it right, he realized and learned from his mistakes. he’s still a good man and a good father. “My mother was very adamant in not giving the past enough power to drown you. I’m following that advice, so should you.” hear hear!!

“It almost sounded like a business deal.” well, it is, to be honest. especially to most. Cherie and Cece are one of the lucky ones bc of the love marriage and that they managed to have husbands who wouldn’t care about it. “I want whatever you’ll give me my love.” UGH THEY’RE SO CUTE.

“No one is to even enter the hallway, we must be alone.” OOH IT’S ABOUT TO GET JUICY. “My father lost all our money to Frederick.” Oh? “Fred*rick committed fraud.” OH?? “And both fraud and forgery are capital crimes.” YES GET HIS ASS IN FUCKING JAIL!!! i knew he was a silmey piece of shit. fucking hell he didn’t even have honest money??? “Elias doesn’t like it, and neither will you two but I think you should hear it nonetheless.” oh god....right, let’s hear this then. “and the best way to hurt you is through Anthony.” Cece....i’m with you and i’m still staying with u (barely) but i’m frickin worried. “He was saying how you had a temper like your mother, and how that would be an issue down the road.” the fucking gall of this man. and he claims he loves Cassie when he’s speaking ill of her when she’s already dead? jfc.

“If he believed you were on the verge of a divorce.” WAIT WHAT. “No. That’s not happening. We’re not even discussing that.” // “Exactly!” Thank you! I’m trying to—” i’m sorry but i’m with the boys here !!!! “But it would make Frederick suffer and die.” of course she’s up for it ugh. this is not going to end well. “it was the perfect plan.” NO IT’S NOT. it’s a plan, a decent one, no dangerous one. BUT IT’S NOT PERFECT. IT’S STILL BAD. “Just like what your mother would have wanted.” oof, i’m not too sure about that.

“Mother would never want you to go through that hell. You’re fooling yourself if you believe otherwise.” I AM WITH YOU ELIAS I AM SO SO WITH YOU. i sure as hell know that Cassie would never ever approve of this. like she’s spent all her life protecting Cherie, she took Cherie AWAY to France so she could preserve her innocence and keep her safe and so she didn’t have to deal with the scrutiny of the ton growing up and they’re going to do this?? which is the exact same thing Cassie worked so hard to prevent and shield Cherie from?? do we really think she would put revenge above the safety, security, mental and emotional health of her own daughter? 

“Great, then it’ll be my fault.” oh god, oh no. UGH HE’S SO PROTECTIVE IT HURTS. Anthony your hero complex is showing alkslask but he might be onto something here. on one hand, it will keep Cherie away from ruin. they never blame the man as heavily when it comes to infidelity unfortunately. but not quite thooooo bc that won’t erase the fact that the ton will still blame the woman in this. i mean hello, it’s the 18th century, misogyny at it’s peak. they will still gossip about her, say things like 'something must be wrong with her' etc. or ‘she’s not as strong as she is to hold down a rake’ yada yada and hello?? the in the first scene alone Cherie was the one who cared so much about the Whistledown paper and what the ton thinks, are we really sure she can brave this on without crumbling under the pressure??? i know she’s thick skinned, she’s been raised that way. and i know she can take this with her head high especially if she knows the full truth. but people still have limits and when they’re going to be the talk of the town day after day after day, negative comments after the other, saying bad things about your marriage, your husband, about you, someone’s going to break at some point. WHICH IS WHY I STILL DON’T THINK THIS IS A GOOD IDEA.

I HAVEN’T EVEN MENTIONED CHERIE’S INSECURITIES !!!! I mean they JUST talked about it at the start and ugh. I CAN POKE SO MANY HOLES INTO THIS PLANS. miscommunication? misunderstanding? insecurities??? what if the problem will stem from inside the house a.k.a. Cherie and Anthony having an actual quarrel??? what if Cherie starts thinking that Anthony is actually starting to regret the marriage for real??? and this is the perfect excuse for him to be a “rake” in the guise as a ruse???? i know she trusts him and everything but ugggh INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS CAN BE SO CRUEL. Cherie i am keeping a heavy eye on you here. You know this is part of the plan. i swear if you start not being able to separate fact from fiction, i swear if you start villainizing Anthony again I SWEAR.

“You’re the devil incarnated, that’s what you are. Every time I see you I have the urge to throw holy water at you.” ELIAS LMAAAAAOO I LOVE THIS LINE SO MUCH. “Yeah Cece, he needs to know because I need to stay alive for this plan to work.” THAT’S WHAT I WAS THINKING LMAO. do we really think Percy won’t run straight to Anthony with a fucking shotgun in hand when he finds out about him being unfaithful and doesn’t know it’s a ruse??? “No, Anthony makes a good point for once.” FOR ONCE. I CACKLED. he HAD to get that in there to balance out his compliment LMAO. he can’t show love to his boy unless it’s a bit backhanded. i love these two so much.

“Very well then. Let’s pretend to hate each other.” ugh, it’s fake enemies now huh. i can’t believe Elias is the only one who at least had a bit of braincell in this. the plan COULD work, but it also could go wrong on so many levels i caaan’t. but sigh, they’re going to pretend they don’t like each other behind close doors too for the staff. i wonder how that’s going to affect their nightly activities when they can’t even be a foot near each other with out jumping each other’s bones LMAO. maybe this is a good lesson for them, a moment of celibacy bc they’ve been going at it like rabbits. BUT AH. i want this plan to work so that Fuckwad™️ can finally die very unpeacefully, but i’m also so scared this would blow up in their facessss. but gosh, we’re almost near the end, bittersweet but i can’t wait!!!

– TM Anon™️

Omg darliiing hiiii! 😱😍❤ Oh I’m so exciteeeed! ❤

Loll Cherie probably feels like she unlocked a hidden aspect of fighting 😂 And they really did!😈

Holy water omg😂

Anthony Whore™ Bridgerton YOU ARE RIGHT AND YOU SHOULD SAY IT😂 I think he was smug for the whole day 😂

Exactlyyy! I think it changed a lot of things that Anthony wanted to talk to her that morning ❤ Like, he actually assured her that he would never cheat on her and that fights/arguments don’t mean a relationship is doomed, and she needed to hear that ❤

Character development is so much fuuun, I love it! ❤

Iona and Lucie miss each other a lot now that Cherie is living in Bridgerton house! ❤

Percycore™ I AM SCREAMING AT THIS YES! 😂 Percy would never let anyone see how he really feels about Frederick’s return💔

Aunt Lavinia and Cherie are so similar in that aspect! ❤ Like, I’m sure when Elias becomes the duke, Cherie will still not care about his title at all😂 She can come and go to his study as she wishes 😂

Percy and Cherie are on much better terms and they’re growing closer ❤

Percy and Anthony as a duo, that would be amazing! ❤ They’d make quite the team😂

Awww Percy was enamored by Cassie for sure, even when they first danced❤ He was head over heels by the time the dance was over ❤

tbh i’d read a whole novel of Perssandra even if it ends in tragedy alkslkas Honeeey, this is incredibly sweet of you to say! 😍❤

Lolll if Percy heard he’d have a grandchild…😂 He’d get so emotional! ❤

🎶We’re all in this together🎶

They do make a very powerful family❤ If only Cassie were there too, they’d be unstoppable❤

Oh yes, Percy will feel guilty about what happened until his last breath 💔 Cassie was the love of his life, and she actually loved him and trusted him only for him to believe Frederick and stab her in the back with that whole divorce thing💔 He will try his hardest to make everything perfect for Elias and Cherie but deep down, that guilt will never go away ❤

Yesss exactly! Like, normally Elias and Anthony were supposed to care about “having heirs” and all that but they’re both so in love with Cece and Cherie that they couldn’t care less about the gender of the baby, which was quite uncommon back in those days ❤

He deserves jail for all the pain he caused Cassie alone, and fraud and forgery were like, unforgivable crimes back in Georgian and Victorian era 😈 I feel like Frederick thinks he was the only one who could “handle” Cassie’s temper and they’d have a happier marriage than Cassie and Percy….he’s that delusional 😏

i sure as hell know that Cassie would never ever approve of this. like she’s spent all her life protecting Cherie, she took Cherie AWAY to France so she could preserve her innocence and keep her safe and so she didn’t have to deal with the scrutiny of the ton growing up and they’re going to do this?? which is the exact same thing Cassie worked so hard to prevent and shield Cherie from?? THIS! THIIIIS!

This is so so true! 😍❤  This whole plan goes against everything Cassie tried to keep her away from; Frederick, the ton’s relentless criticism and all those rumors 💔 And the difference is that, Cassie knew exactly what all that could do to a person, Cherie might think she knows but she has no idea yet 😏

Like, all those rumors surrounding her when she first arrived in London? They would be nothing compared to what’s about to happen 😈

Yessss! The way ton would talk about Anthony’s infidelity is sooo so different than the rumors that would happen if Cherie’s loyalty was in question 😱 No one would ever outcast Anthony from the ton, there wouldn’t be any backlash at all –it would be seen as something normal even, considering the era— there would even be people supporting it 💔

If Cherie did it, on the other hand? She could never go back from that, ever 💔

in the first scene alone Cherie was the one who cared so much about the Whistledown paper and what the ton thinks, are we really sure she can brave this on without crumbling under the pressure??? Oh this is a really good question😏

I mean they JUST talked about it at the start and ugh. I CAN POKE SO MANY HOLES INTO THIS PLANS. miscommunication? misunderstanding? insecurities??? what if the problem will stem from inside the house a.k.a. Cherie and Anthony having an actual quarrel??? what if Cherie starts thinking that Anthony is actually starting to regret the marriage for real???

I’m so glad you brought that up love! 😱 So for now, Cherie thinks she can totally handle it but it’s definitely not going to be as easy as she thinks, especially when the insecurities hit her ❤ Cassie wasn’t nearly as coddled or sheltered from bad things as her, and even she found it so difficult to handle it, so both Anthony and Cherie will have to be very careful with this, they’re playing with fire there❤

Loll Anthonias brotp is so fuuun!❤ If they didn’t let Percy know about the plan though, that would go really bad for Anthony for sure 😂

Fake dating is out, fake enemies is in 😂

Oh that’s going to affect their nightly activities, especially because they can’t be seen in the same room so they’ll have to sneak around and they can’t be heard having fun either 😏 

Last 3 chapters! It’ll be a rollercoaster, I hope you will like it! ❤

Darling, thank you so so much for this, you’re absolutely amazing! ❤❤ You’ve made my day with this, ILYSM! ❤❤❤

[insecurity-issues]

Could Have Been Me | Jason Todd

Pairing: Jason Todd X Singer!Fem!Reader

A/N: yeah okay i wrote this for my sis so👹

Warnings: Mentions of death and drugs, swearing, neglectful parents, mentions of verbal abuse

___________________________________

Y/N was part of the L/N family. Her parents forced her to take countless tutoring and singing lessons, but it was never good enough.

All Y/N ever wanted was to make her parent's happy, although it was rare. She was neglected, verbally abused. She thought nobody would ever love her.

That's until she met, Jason Todd.

The pair met when Y/N snuck out for the first time ever to have some freedom for once. She dressed in street clothes and walked into the darkly lit streets.

Everything was going fine, which was a surprise for a city like Gotham. Oh but Y/N spoke too soon. Not long after, she bumped into a drug dealer who seemed to be in a not-so-very-good-mood.

-Hey kid ! Watch where you're going !

He then started to chase Y/N. In a panic, she desperately ran as fast as she could. The man was gonna catch up to her before somebody pulled her into the corner of an alley.

-Follow me.

A teenage boy, about the same age as her, helped Y/N cross the rooftops as if it was a normal thing to do.

Then, he picked up a spare pipe line by the side of the roof and used it to spring himself to the next building.

She stared at him in awe,

-How do you expect me to do that ?!

-Do you trust me?

He stated with a smirk. He looked behind her and spotted the thug, he ushered her to hurry up and so she quickly and nervously copied his actions.

Once she landed, she laughed breathlessly along with the boy, and they both ran to what looked like a small run down and abandoned apartment, with patches in the roof and had stolen blankets and pillows all over the place.

-Whoops. Didn't have time to clean up.

He kicked one of the pillows nearby.

-You... Live here?

-Not everybody can afford a fancy ass house, princess.

He looked at her beside him, smirking.

-Oh geez, uh I am so sorry. I did not mean for it to sound that way.

-Eh, It's alright. Anyways, I'm Jason. Jason Todd.

He stuck out his hand for her to shake, in which she took it gladly.

-Y/N. Y/N L/N.

As time went on, they continued to meet and soon fell in love. Nobody knew about it, so it was like a secret relationship. Y/N knew well that her parent's would NEVER allow their child to date a 'street' boy.

[Time Skip]

-...Yeah I was thinking 'Blaze of glory' could be the next line y'know?

-Blaze of glory, huh?

You smirked, nudging his shoulder with yours.

-Oh shut up !

He laughed lightly.

-My mom... She- Well- I just hope she comes to her senses and regret marrying my dad.

Jason sighed, twirling his guitar pick in his hand.

-Jason...

-What? I mean, wouldn't YOU not wanna look back and be like 'It could have been me if I did this'?

-You are unbelievable, Jay.

-That better be meant in a good way, princess.

-Hm, we'll see about that.

You smirked, he chuckled. You were gonna kiss when suddenly your parents bursted into your room.

-WHAT IS GOING ON HERE ?!

-Get away from my daughter !

Your father pushed Jason off the bed and grabbed you close.

-Dad, Mom, please. He's a friend I met!

-A filthy street rat ? What's gotten into you Y/N ? This boy is probably teaching you how to steal things and- and... do drugs !

Your mom shrieked, pointing at Jason. He looked lost, not knowing what to do. You would help him up if your dad wasn't holding your wrist so tightly.

-Get out of my house before I call GCPD, boy.

Your dad said sternly. Jason hurriedly stood up and climbed back out the window, giving you a quick last look and an apologetic smile.

-He won't bother you now, Y/N. Now get back to work.

Your mother stated before the duo left the room. You picked up his guitar pick and sadly smiled, keeping it in your pocket.

-

It's been 2 years now, Y/N was in New York whilst Jason stayed in Gotham. They've kept contact through phone calls and planned to meet on the 3rd of May, since Y/N's first concert will be in Gotham.

-Hello ? Alfred ? Uh, the gala is near and so I was wondering if I could speak to Jason about it ?

-Miss Y/N... Have you not heard the news ?

Alfred said through the other line, worry and sadness laced in his tone.

-What news ?

-Master Jason... He died a week ago. The family is miserable.

-Wait.. What ?...

-I am sorry..

-No... No ! This isn't true !

You covered your mouth in an attempt to hide your wails, you could hear the butler sighing deeply.

-Sadly, it is. We'll see you at the gala Miss Y/N.

And just like that, the call ended. Y/N dropped to her knees and put her head in her hands.

-No... Oh God... NO ! Jason... Please...

You desperately sobbed even though it was getting hard to breathe. You stayed like that, crying, for hours. You couldn't believe it, it was hard to accept the fact that the love of your life had passed away. You grabbed the painted guitar pick laying on your side table and held it close to your chest.

-I'll never forget you, Jason.

[THE DAY BEFORE THE GALA]

-Hello ? Y/N ?

Bruce called Y/N in an attempt for her to answer.

-Yes ?

She weakly spoke, she hasn't taken care of herself ever since she heard the news about Jason.

-Okay, listen. I want you to stay calm while I say this, alright ?

-...Okay.

-So, Jason came back to life through the Lazarus pit of Ra's Al Ghul. Damian's grandfather. He was insane for a bit before we managed to change his perspective. Because of that, we changed the purpose of the gala to a celebration for Jason's resurrection. He doesn't know you're performing there, he thinks you already performed a few days ago. I need you to stay calm tomorrow and surprise him, is that okay with you ?

It felt like a bomb shell dropped on Y/N, she was quick to process this information and laughed in relief and happiness.

-Yes. Yes of course ! See you tomorrow, Mister Wayne ! Oh thank you so much !

She exclaimed in excitement, he chuckled. You both said your goodbye's and Y/N was her normal self again. She squealed and got ready to perform the next day.

-

-Now, for our performer of the night : Everyone, L/N Y/N !

Jason walked in to see all the commotion and snapped his head towards the host once he heard your name. Wasn't she supposed to be back in NYC ? He wondered.

-Alfred ? What's going on ?

-All will be revealed in time, Master Jason.

Alfred spoke with a knowing smirk before attending to the other guest's needs.

His brothers dragged him to the front where the Wayne Family stayed, they all looked at him expectantly while he stood there confused.

-Alright Gothamite's, Let's get it !

He heard your voice and turned his head to the stage once again, widening his eyes at the sight of you, you've grown so much. You looked stunning.

Don't wanna live

as an untold story

He looks to Dick who stood beside him, his brother grinning widely back. Dick nodded towards the stage and started clapping.

Rather go out in a

Blaze of glory

His eyes go to her, him chuckling breathlessly. You turned around and locked eyes with him, both of you giving a smile that spoke too many words.

-No fucking way.

He muttered under his breath, seeing you twirl his old guitar pick in your hand before using it to play your guitar.

I can't hear you,

I don't fear you now

He looks around and his eyes land on Bruce, his adoptive father giving him an encouraging smile. Jason watches you and you never break eyes contact with him, it's as if you two were the only people in the room.

You then symbolize bat ears on your head with your hands as you grin teasingly at him, at this point he knows this song was directed for him, and him only.

Wrapped in your regret

What a waste of blood and sweat, oh

I wanna taste love and pain

Wanna feel pride and shame

-She's... Wow.

He thought out loud as his brother's laughed at him, but Jason didn't notice. He was focused on you. He takes a minute to reminisce all of your moments together, from adolescence to adulthood, before...

Don't wanna waste my time

Don't wanna waste one line

He understood the lyrics and teared up at the thought of you writing for him. Tears drip down his features unknowingly and he still couldn't take his eyes off you.

I wanna live better days,

Never look back and say

"It could have been me"

You sing while he whispers it with you. He smiles up at you on stage.

-Fuck yeah I missed her !

He nudged Dick while smirking and turned back to enjoy the performance.

She sings the final note before bowing, everybody erupting into cheers and claps as she goes back stage.

-Go.

Dick whispered beside him and pushed him in the direction you were heading.

He snaps out of it and starts running back stage, finding you crying with staff surrounding you.

He shyly stepped forward and tapped your shoulder. You abruptly turned around in a panic and spotted him. You smiled and hugged him tightly, he took a few steps back from the impact.

After years of vigilante instincts, he has an urge to push you away. But he also has another side, the happy Jason that only you knew.

He hugged you back tightly and gave you a quick peck on the lips and forehead, lightly laughing before whispering into your ear.

-I'm back, doll.

[vneuns]

That’s what I said (Corpse x Reader)

Summary: It’s the first time since you’ve given birth to your daughter that you’ve left her alone with her father and when you get home it warms your heart to hear them in bed together having a “conversation”

A/n: Everyone seemed to love my first corpse with a kid fic so here we are. I’d love if you guys dropped a follow or a comment on what you think

Pairing: Corpse x Wife!Reader

Trigger warnings: postpartum depression? i don’t really know if that’s a tw but just in case

Word count: 0.4k

“We’ll be fine.” Corpse told you as he bounced the newborn that had just woken up from a nap who was rubbing her eyes and snuggling into his chest. You pouted looking between the identical daddy daughter duo. “Don’t make me go.” You scrunched your nose up faking a tantrum. 

After delivering your daughter she never left your side. For a whole week you didn’t shower not wanting to be apart from her, until your husband practically forced you into the bathroom. 

He understood where you were coming from. You were a new mom who spent 18 hours in delivery. It was normal. But he had also done his research and knew in exactly a week the post partum depression would kick in. 

Recently you had stopped eating at least 3 meals a day and you started getting out of bed around 2. 

“You haven’t seen any of your friends since you gave birth.” It hurt to admit how right he was. You avoided his gaze sighing. “You’ll be fine and so will we. Now go have fun while we watch peppa pig.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle before kissing the top of Y/d/ns’ head and then pressing a kiss to your husbands lips.

-

After unlocking the door to your apartment you were met with silence. An unsettling one at that. Corpse hadn’t told you he’d be going out. And it was only 7 they shouldn’t be sleeping. 

Being as that the two of you were trying to get her on a sleep schedule going to sleep so early wouldn’t help. 

You closed the door and locked it placing your bag on the hook before moving down the hall towards your room. Just as you were about to open the door your husbands voice carried out into the hallway. 

“You know you look just like your mother?” Y/d/n gurgled causing her dad to laugh. “Exactly like her. How am I suppose to say no to you if I can’t say no to her and you look just like her.” A smile crept it’s way onto your face as you pressed you ear to the door. 

“You’re going to be spoiled rotten and your mom’s gonna be on my ass about that, but who am I to say no to you?” 

The little girl on the opposite side of the door babbled something which seemed like the funniest thing to Corpse. “That’s what I said!”

[bbrandy2002]

Fool’s Rush In

Chapter 20

Book: TRR

Pairing: Liam x Riley

Warnings: Language and mentions of weird sexual stuff

**Thanks @burnsoslow​. for pre-reading and “The Army” girls for snippet reads.

-------------------

“An email from the Countess?” Ana questioned curiously, just before hitting the video attachment that came with it. Her plush lips soon curved into an enchanted grin when it became apparent who the subjects in the video were and precisely what they were doing together. “Looks like you’re about to get your hard-hitting royal news after all.”

Having finally retrieved his phone, Donnie situated himself upright in the bed and began playing the same email attachment as his lover. By the sounds of the grunts and groans coming from Ana’s phone, it was apparent to the ace-reporter what he was about to watch -- even if the occasional horse neighs were a little confusing. 

Within seconds of hitting play, the man’s jaw dropped wide open as he took in the content. 

“Holy shit, dude, Is that …?”

Ana's intrigued gaze tore from her phone screen and raised a brow at Donnie. “The King’s head guard dressed like a cowboy spanking Lucretia Nevrakis and licking another woman wearing a horse mask in a barn?” She shook her head. “Yes … and did you just call me ‘dude’?”

Ignoring her question, the couple resumed watching for a few more seconds, their facial expressions morphing from one of intrigue to utter disgust when finally Lucretia went full-frontal, nudity before the camera, then spreading wide for Bastien. “Oh, God! The hell?” Donnie grimaced as Ana slapped a hand over her mouth next to him and turned her head away. “I can’t watch this shit.” He lamented, quickly shutting his phone off.

After Ana followed suit and powered her cell off too, the pair sat in uncomfortable silence, simultaneously staring blankly at the same wall across from them, neither knowing what to say or think about what they had just watched together. Eventually, Ana lifted the satin sheet covering her waist up a little higher over her breast, a sense of sleaze and uncleanliness rooting itself and sprouting throughout her body. “I … I don’t know what part was worse: Mystery horsewoman with the guinea pig in Bastien or Lucretia’s wrinkled tramp-stamp with ‘Connie’ written inside what I can only assume is a dick.”

Donnie pinched the bridge of his nose. “Let’s be clear: there was no worse part. It was all worse! What the hell was that, anyway?”

The Trend editor just shook her head slowly with a glazed-over expression in her eyes; she finally spoke, “I … I think I’m going to go now.” 

“Ana! Don’t let this ruin our night.”

Her expression turned remorseful at his pleading; it had been a great night. “I’m sorry, Mr. Brine. I need to be alone.”

Neither one could look at the other. Ana slowly raised from the bed, gathering up her scattered clothes from the floor, tearing her bra from the doorknob, and then slipped on her heels. Why the Countess sent that video to them, she’d never know, but as she and Donnie exchanged a timid wave of goodbye, Ana left knowing she would never forgive Madeleine Amaranth for ruining the best night of sex she ever had.

This had to be some kind of bizarre and insane mistake.

And usually, Donnie Brine would call this “hard-hitting” new’s story into the station and scramble for the nearest camera to report on it. 

This was not something he would ever share with Cordonia, nor would the duo realize what they just watched was not the video the Countess intended to send them.

---------------------------------

A baby. My baby. I’m going to be a father. Those words were all Liam could think about as he rode through the glittery neon boulevards of Las Vegas toward the hospital. At that moment, the clear blue heavens above him could open wide and strike him down with a bolt of thunder, and he’d swear he wouldn’t have felt a thing. The King was riding a wave of euphoria unlike anything he’d ever experienced; Riley loved him and was carrying his baby. Nothing in all the world mattered anymore.

Before taking off, it was clear that Bastien likely escaped during the brother’s brawl in the front yard of Riley’s home and apparently took the keys to the Escalade they arrived in with him. The neighborly Burt, who moments prior had a shotgun aimed at the royal duo, reluctantly agreed to drive into the city to drop them off at the hospital on his way to pick up his daughter on the east side of town. He gruffly mentioned, "my girl never learned not to kick her customers in the frank 'n' beans and steal their shit," but neither of the brothers paid much attention.

Riding in the back of a truck while sitting on a spare tire through sunny downtown Vegas wasn’t the way Liam intended to get there, but he was dead set on finding his Pussycat by any means necessary. And, of course, Leo called shotgun but was nice enough to offer his little brother the opportunity to “ride bitch”.

Liam unequivocally declined.

During the bumpy 25-minute ride to Valley Hospital, Liam wondered how it was possible to get everything he ever wanted in such a brief span of time. Literally, his entire heart's desires were being gifted to him one by one; it was both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. All he ever wanted was to find happiness, a chance to love, and have a genuine family of his own -- Not an arrangement that would guarantee him a life of misery at worst or of mediocrity at best. When he stepped foot in Sin City several weeks ago, depressed and hopeless at the prospects of his impending marriage to Madeleine, never did he expect life and fate would throw him a twist in the tale. All it took was a weekend bachelor party, an awkwardly shy woman mistaking him for her Tinder date, and a ton of hard booze shared between them to change the entire trajectory of his life. 

Once the rusted-out truck came to a stop at the emergency entrance, Liam wasted no time climbing over the truck’s wooden rail sides and rushing through the revolving doors. Leo’s heavy footsteps could be heard racing behind him. 

Liam’s heart pounded as the seconds -- which seemed liked hours -- ticked by. Not since he was a young boy waiting on his mother to return from her trip in Auvernal had he been more excited to reunite with someone.

Escorted through the long, winding hallways by hospital security to the radiology department, Liam was led inside a room, where his breath instantly hitched at catching his first glimpse of Riley in two-and-a-half days.

Sitting at the foot of an exam table, dressed in a hospital gown, slender legs bare and swinging freely over the side, Riley’s head snapped up at the sound of the door opening. “Liam,” she whispered, relief dripping from her eyes before sliding off the table.

“Pussycat,” he breathed, unable to contain his emotions as she nearly sprinted the short distance between them and into his waiting arms. “I have missed you terribly, Love.”

Riley held onto him tightly, afraid to let go. “I’m so sorry, Liam. I’m so very sorry,” her strangled voice choked out. “I never should have listened to Madeleine.”

“Shhhh. You have nothing to be sorry about,” Liam assured, his hand threading and kneading through her bountiful hair comfortingly. “I watched the security footage, and I saw the way Madeleine confronted you. The way she grabbed you, the way she -- hurt you.” Liam’s face tightened before he kissed her head. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Riley answered meekly, “Because she threatened to release an old video of me being intimate during my first marriage. She told me if I didn’t leave, that video would get out and that it would look bad on you, and the council would likely strip you of your crown.” She squeezed him tighter. “I had to protect you.”

Liam looked down at his wife affectionately, placing both hands on the sides of her face, his thumbs wiping away the tears desperately clinging like morning dew to her eyes. “Sweetheart, look at me. The only thing you ever have to protect when it comes to me is my heart. I have guards -- although not the best -- to protect me physically. I have tradition and a birthright to protect my name and crown and a military to safeguard my country. But you, Riley ... you, have the power to destroy me. You’re the keeper of my heart. The one who makes it beat. Without your love to keep it going … well, let’s just say I  don’t ever want to know what that kind of pain would feel like.” They kissed once more as if it were their first and last one ever. 

Plucking out a blade of grass from his hair, Riley smiled brightly for the first time in days. “I’ll guard it with everything in me, Liam. I swear it.”

“You bet your sweet ass you will,” Liam smirked mischievously, grabbing a handful of her backside, causing her to belt out a laugh. “Besides, you took a drunken vow at the Graceland Wedding Chapel before Leo, Mongo, and Pinquee Kittee to love me tender, love me true; that’s about as sacred and binding of an oath as it gets.”

Riley chuckled. “I did. And we all know how those three are the greatest examples of loving and committed relationships.  Even if Mongo did try to steal you away from me.”

“Which worries me considering he’s apparently our ‘son.’” Liam said it tongue-in-cheek, but it instantly reminded him of the other reason he was in such a rush to get to his queen. The playfulness in his mannerisms tapered off, and he became more serious. Liam leaned down, pressing a kiss to her forehead before working his way lower to the tip of her nose, her lips, and further to Riley’s chin. Slowly sinking to his knees, sliding his hands down her body until he had a firm grip on her slender hips, Liam rested his own forehead on Riley’s lower tummy.

“It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

“What’s that?” Riley asked softly.

Liam placed a lingering kiss onto the thin covering over her flat tummy and glanced up into her gleaming eyes, both filled with ceaseless wonder and rapture. “How you can love someone so much that you’ve never met.”

Riley blinked away a tear, her tiny fingers tracing feather-like trails through his hair. “I know, and yet somehow I’ve been asking myself that question since I met you.”

Liam’s eyes crinkled with a tender smile. “Me too.”

--------------------------------- 

Pacing languidly up and down the hallway outside the room where Liam and Riley were reuniting, Leo let out an exasperated huff before halting his steps to take a quick gander through the long glass window of the door. Leo smiled at watching his brother and sister-in-law embrace and seemed thrilled to be with one another again. And the prospects of -- in his mind -- becoming an uncle “again” was cool and all, but he was bored as hell. Liam was adamant about the former prince staying put and giving him this time needed to speak with Riley in private. Usually, Leo would pay no attention to what Liam asked of him, but maybe, just maybe, it was time for him to get serious and act like the adult he was. Read the room. Respect boundaries. Know when to quit.

Or maybe not.

Stuffing his hands into his pockets, he headed back in the direction that he and Liam had been led from moments ago, looking for something to kill time.  Strolling leisurely past a set of double doors that displayed “Emergency” in big red letters next to them, a thought suddenly struck, and he took two gliding steps backward. Leo lifted a speculative brow; there was something in the inner machination of his chaotic brain that told him to follow his gut, head inside, and he wouldn’t be sorry. Never one to ignore an instinct or impulse, Leo punched the large metallic button on the wall, causing one of the automatic doors to swing open. 

After stepping inside, he meandered around for a minute, not exactly sure what he was looking for but hoping he might catch a glimpse of a hot nurse walking around without a top on who would want to do naughty things to him. Or perhaps, a naked lady doctor with a nice ass who would manhandle him out of the emergency department, but who he’d eventually win over with his impeccable good looks and god-like sex appeal. He could pretend to be her patient, and if he were lucky, she’d have a bad bedside manner.

Passing a row of draped exam rooms, Leo noticed one curtain pulled open and a young brunette, with part of her thong showing, crouched on the floor, peeking stealthily through the blue drapery that divided the area from the patient on the opposite side.

Curious now to what this woman was so interested in from the next exam room, Leo crossed his arm and stared downward at the floor, lightly whistling a tune, as two doctors walked past him. When they rounded a corner, Leo edged closer to the curtain to listen in.

“Mr. Walker, do you feel any pain when I do this?”

“Ow! What the fuck do you think?” 

At hearing Drake’s irascible voice, Leo’s ears instantly shot up. “No way,” Leo mumbled in astonishment to himself. “Walker is here?” The last he knew, Drake was supposed to have headed back to Cordonia the day before. He leaned in closer.

“You pinched my dick with a pair of damn tweezers. Yeah, you could say there’s a little pain there. Shit!”

Leo clamped a fist over his mouth to keep from busting out. Of all the places his naughty gut had ever led him to, knowing Drake was here and having transplanted dick problems may have been in his top 100 --Nothing would ever beat running with the bulls in Barcelona with Kanye and a very stoned Prince Charles. Leo smiled fondly at the memory before shaking his head and getting back to business.

“We’re just making sure you have feeling in your penis, Mr. Walker.”

“Then touch it with a fucking finger. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you people? You wanna take a jackhammer to my knees next and see if they feel pain too?”

“That won’t be necessary,” Leo overheard the doctor tell Drake. “I expect you’re going to be fine, Mr. Walker. I didn’t see any major discoloration aside from a deep bluish hue to your testicles --” Leo snorted out loudly, causing the doctor to turn his head briefly to the disruption outside the curtain, before clearing his throat and continuing, “A hearty ejaculation or two should clear that right up. When was the last time you --”

“I’ll take care of it,” Drake hastily interrupted in a peevish tone, not wanting the physician to finish the question.

“Very well then. You should be fine. I’ll have the nurse get your discharge papers together, and you can be on your way … And, sir ... try to avoid getting ninja smacked by hookers in the future.”

“I’ll see what I can do …. asshole.” Drake snarled under his breath.

Feeling spunky, an impish grin crossed Leo’s lips as he strolled away undetected from Drake’s doctor leaving his room. “The Drakesters not going anywhere just yet,” he snickered, heading toward a cart with blue scrubs that he passed earlier. “Paging Dr.Wolfshitz to trauma room one. Stat.”

--------------------

Still peeking inconspicuously into the next exam room, Alyssa’s gaze followed Drake’s doctor and a nurse as they exited to work on his discharge. She remained motionless and quiet, barely breathing, fearful she’d get caught. Why she hadn’t looked away yet was beyond her. What was only supposed to be a little looksie at the man, to quench her gnawing intrigue over what was below his belt, had now left her drawn to him.

And while Alyssa saw for herself that everything was normal down there, -- humungous, actually -- it was the sadness and hurt in his deep chocolate eyes that kept the perky, petite woman in spy mode. 

“You can stop hiding behind that curtain, Riley’s friend,” Drake grumbled.

“Eep!” Alyssa yelped at being caught and took a quick step back, nearly toppling clumsily over her feet. He couldn’t have been talking about her. He wasn’t even looking in her direction when he said it. She had been so careful to remain hidden. But who the hell else could he be talking to? Alyssa held her breath, hoping another one of Riley’s friends was hidden on the other side.

“I saw your little beady eyes watching me. Might as well come out from behind that curtain and laugh in my face … you wouldn’t be the first one.”

There were no doubts he was talking about her now. Frozen in panic and unable to move, Alyssa’s cheeks burned, and her heart raced at getting called out. She wondered why she couldn’t have just left well enough alone. If curiosity killed the cat, Alyssa just spent all nine of her lives.

“That’s how it's gonna be, huh?” Drake called out to her again in a snarky tone, yet Alyssa didn’t dare move. “That’s fine. I know I’m just a big joke to everyone now.” He lowered his voice just slightly in self-pity. “Maybe in some ways, I always have been.”

That stung. Alyssa couldn’t discern whether he was actually upset with her about snooping on him -- he probably was -- or as the nagging feeling in her gut was telling her: he just needed a friend. Taking in a deep breath, she skittishly slipped the curtain aside, avoiding eye contact and forcing only a diffident smile. “I’m … I’m sorry.”

He smiled back. “I’m not. I’m Drake.”

---------

With Riley discovering she was pregnant, the E.R. attending opted to forego continuing with the ordered x-rays, believing she had nothing more than a bruised tailbone from her fall, anyway. With the pain she experienced since the encounter with Madeleine, the doctor wanted her to have an ultrasound to ensure everything was fine with the baby and date the pregnancy.

Riley laid back on the exam table, feet planted and legs separated. A technician gingerly moved around an ultrasound probe under the sheet draped from her waist to her bent up knees. Riley and Liam vigilantly watched the screen, anxiously waiting for the black-and-white image to produce the first glimpse of their baby.

Flashing a timid smile, Riley glanced up at Liam, who was hovering over her with his eyes transfixed on the screen. Noticing her unsure look, he leaned down and whispered, “Everything okay, love?”

She shook her head almost imperceptibly and answered meagerly with all seriousness, “What if … what if our baby has a beard, Liam?”

The bewildered king puckered his forehead, unsure what to say. “Wh--why would the baby have a beard, pussycat?” He squeezed her hand reassuringly before she yanked it away and covered her eyes in embarrassment.

She sucked in an unsteady breath, impervious to the prodding continuing below. “Because my Aunt Clem’s firstborn came out with a tiny goatee like that munchkin from the Lollipop Guild,” she began to whimper in increasing frustration, plucking at the tip of her chin.

Liam’s eyes widened as he blew out a huff of air. “Then … I suppose … we’ll stick him in a carnival or something.” He chuckled despite himself. “Or get him one of those top hats and a cane.”

“It was a girrrrrrl,” Riley cried out, covering her face again. “My dad’s family is from Kentucky … there’s gotta be inbreeding somewhere in the past. Our baby will come out looking like a mini Chewbacca, and it’s all my fault. Oh god! What have I done to our child?” She sniffled through her rant, “If you want a divorce, I’ll understand.”

Normally able to keep a stoic demeanor in any kind of situation, Liam just couldn’t do it in this instance. He turned his face away to prevent his wife from seeing the giant smirk on his face and to take a moment to regain his composure from wanting to bust out at her theatrics. He didn’t know what the hell he married into or why this woman he loved so much all of a sudden had forgotten she was adopted. 

It would be an interesting nine months.

Riley frowned with a simper, “You can’t even look at me. I’ll have to raise this little hairball all by myself. They’ll have us in the ‘weird things’ section of the National Enquirer next to Drake.”

She was correct: he couldn’t look at her -- she was being completely ridiculous. Liam’s shoulders bounced against his stifled laughter. “Dear God, Riley. You’ve got to stop.”

“You’re laughing at me.”

Unaware of the pair of eyes at the foot of the exam table, glaring between the couple in absolute confusion, the technician performing the scan cleared her throat to break the tension. “I hate to interrupt … this.” She nodded between the two.”But, here’s your baby.” She tapped her fingertip on the screen to a small oblong shape on the monitor with a tiny white form in the center. Riley lowered her hands from her teary face and whipped her head around at the same time Liam did, both wholly captivated. “It’s too early to tell if there is a … goatee. But this little flicker right here --” She pointed out. “-- Is where the heart is beating.”

Feeling his wife’s hand grip his tighter, Liam stood motionless for a moment as he watched the tech pause the screen to get measurements before sucking in his lips and dropping his head onto Riley’s shoulder. “Did you see the heart beating, my love? That’s our baby. Our perfect baby.”

Blinking back a tear of joy, Riley turned her head toward her shoulder to meet Liam’s adoring eyes. “Thank you for not covering your lizard.”

-----------------------------

Blushing from head to toe in guilt and embarrassment, Alyssa took a step inside of Drake’s room, letting the curtain fall back behind her. Twirling a section of hair around her finger, she continued to apologize, feeling it was the right thing to do. “Again, I’m really sorry, Mr. Walker --”

“I told you my name is Drake. Mr. Walker was my father’s name. Please, just call me Drake,” he insisted in a softer tone that took the awkward-feeling Alyssa by surprise.

“Drake,” she repeated as she picked at the cuticle of her thumbnail, “I shouldn’t have been watching you, and I know I invaded your privacy. I swear, in spite of what this looks like, I’m not some creeper. I just thought … “ Alyssa looked away bashfully, twisting on her feet. “you’re really handsome.” It was true, even if she knew damn well that’s not why she peeked in at him.

Drake cocked a brow, calling her bluff. “Really?” he replied skeptically. ”That’s the only thing you were looking at?”

Dabbing at her increasingly perspiring forehead and feeling the blood drain into her feet, Alyssa declared, “I think I’m going to pass out now.”

Sensing she was serious, Drake quickly tapped the rolling chair next to his bed and insisted she sit down. Walking on wobbly legs, Alyssa finally plopped down on the chair and fanned her ashen face with one hand. Drake quickly twisted the cap off an unopened bottle of cold water one of the nurses had given him and offered it to Alyssa. She gratefully took it and guzzled a giant swig from the plastic container. Soon her breathing normalized, and the color in her face started to pinken again.

Drake stared at her in concern. “Do you want me to yell for the doctor?”

Alyssa shook her head insistently. “No. I’m better now. I just got a little anxious, is all, but I deserved it. I shouldn’t have looked at you.” She paused for a moment before offering a genuine smile. “By the way: I don’t think you’re a joke, and I would never laugh at you. I really do think you’re handsome.”

He could tell what she was saying to him was true, and for the first time in weeks, it felt nice to have someone to talk to who didn’t want to discuss a certain medical procedure he’d recently undergone. “I appreciate that … Alyssa, right?” She nodded her head. “You have beautiful eyes --”

“I hate to interrupt this party, -- ay,” A doctor in blue scrubs, a surgical cap, mask, and a horrible Canadian accent came strolling in gleefully, almost out of nowhere. “It’s time for your surgery, Mr. Walkersan -- ay.”

Drake shot straight up in his bed, glaring at the man. “What?” he screeched. “I’m getting discharged. That other doctor said I was fine.”

“Oh no, no, no -- ay. Doctor … Pepper … Stein, sent me down here to wheel you at once into surgery. Your test results showed a lot of icky stuff that needs to be taken care of at once lest you lose your manhood again. Ay.”

Narrowing his eyes, Drake shot back. “What bad stuff?”

“Uh, let me see here -- ay,” Leo began flipping through a makeshift chart he was holding in his hands and pretending to scan over a particular page. “Oy me. There seems to be … algae overgrowth in the upper ... sphincter of the … Dua Lipa -- ay. And thees muy crabs have set up a colony on the Los ballsackos.”

“The fuck are you talking about?” Drake asked incredulously while Alyssa patted his arm comfortingly. “What the hell is a Los ballsackos?”

“Es los ballsackos is los ballsackos.” Leo hastily scolded as he eyed Drake sternly. “We shan't have no time to waste. Das ist Viener schloggin … we remove the viewer and then the scloggin or there be little la cucarachas crawling everywhere -- la vie en rose, amigo.”

“No one’s removing my viener, or my scloggin!” Drake protested.

“Excuse me,” Alyssa rose to her feet, knowing there was something off with this sketchy acting doctor. “I speak fluent Spanish and French, and I can tell you, almost none of that made sense. Not to mention the fact that I believe part of that was German and ancient English. ¿De dónde sacaste tu título, doctor?”

Leo’s bright blue eyes dulled with uncertainty as Alyssa crossed her arms, awaiting a response. Scrambling for an answer and wishing he’d paid more attention during his language lessons, he ultimately replied with a shirk, “Eh … Despacito?”

“Despacito?” Alyssa challenged before glancing over at Drake, who was still glaring a hole into the perceived physician, then returning her gaze back to a cow-eyed Leo. “Who are you, really?”

"Who am I really?" Leo replied with a smug grin as he lowered the surgical mask that was hiding his face. "I'm Dr. Wolfschitz, baby."