#eyeball dad reaching through the screen like

[crescentmoonrider]

..... feeling a little called out here, ngl

[cherrycocaineee]

18. Sodapop - A Love All Too Real

*Warning - Smut; spanking, biting, dirty talk, hair pulling, car sex*

“My baby did so well.”

“Cum one more time for me, I know you’ve got it in you.”

“I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.”

*Sodapop’s p.o.v*

   Mickey Mouse was playing loudly throughout the living room, trying to muffle the sounds of the rain beating against the roof. It worked a little, distracting all of us from the brewing storm outside. Two-Bit was sitting next between Steve and I, completely mesmerized by his favorite showing playing on the screen. It wasn’t getting late but most of us were ready to pass out in the spots we sat in; me including, my heavy eyelids sinking each time I blinked. However, we were shaken away when there was a rapid banging noise on the door. I pushed myself up off the cushion and peered towards the closed door like all the others, wondering who could possibly be standing outside in this weather. The knocking came again, except this time with a voice behind it.

  “Seriously guys! Who else would be knocking at your damn door right now?!”

  It was Anni.

   Ponyboy hopped off the floor, leaving Johnny sitting there alone, and opened the front door quickly. Anni was standing there, her hand over her left eye, soaking wet from the rain fall. She glared at him.

  “Took you long enough,” she grumbled.

 “Sorry Anni,” he said, “we expected you to be at home.”

  “I was at home. I got kicked out.”

  When she stepped into the house, the multiple bruises on her skin, fresh blood was collected on her skin and clothes, and when she removed her hand from her eye you could see how bad it really was. Her eye was black and purple, and I could see that some of the blood vessels in her eye were popped due to the red color collecting in her eye.

  “Holy shit,” Two-Bit muttered, his eyes staying off the television now.

 No one cared about Mickey Mouse playing anymore, or how tired they were. We only cared about Anni.

She placed her bag down by the door as she passed Ponyboy, who was still in shock that he couldn’t even move to close the door. Steve did it for him, not wanting rain to get inside the house or on him.

  “Anni,” Darry said, standing in front of her, “this is the third time this week.”

  She looked at all of us before turning back to Darry, the unfazed look on her face never wavering, as she shrugged.

  “So?” She muttered.

 “So,” he continued, “you can’t keep livin’ like this.”

  Anni waved her hand in front of her, rather annoyed that she had to hear this again. Anytime she came over covered in bruises, Darry or one of us would tell her she couldn’t live with her dad again. It was always met with the same unfazed look on her face along with a light shrug of the shoulders. Anni crossed her arm over her chest; I noticed that she didn’t even wince. She was so use to the constant abuse and beatings that they didn’t even hurt her physically anymore.

   “Why not?” She asked, tilting her head to the side.

 “Anni, you do realize that your eyeball is red right? Like the blood vessels in your eye have busted?” Dally inquired, taking a long drag from his cigarette.

 “Well yeah, I’m going to clean myself up and wait for it to heal like always.”

   “But what we’re sayin’,” I said, standing from my spot, “you don’t deserve to be beaten every time you go home. You deserved to be cared for and go to sleep safely.”

  Once more, I noticed that the unfazed look in her eyes never wavered. She was so numbed to the abuse it didn’t seem wrong anymore. Instead, she turned away from all of us, facing the open bathroom ready to head inside so she could avoid the problem.

  “Doesn’t matter to me. Lots of things shouldn’t happen but they do. People take what they want from me whenever they please; the want sex, they don’t have to ask they just take, if every night someone wants to beat the hell out of me so that they feel better then so be it. I’m nothing more than a toy; a disposable piece of shit that people tend to keep around until they’re done using me.”

  With those final words, she walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. My heart broke into hundreds of pieces after hearing her say those words. Anni wasn’t a bad person, she just never knew what it felt like to be loved and cherished. All I wanted to do was love and cherish her. To lay beside her at night and hold her. To pepper her face with dozens of kisses while caressing her small form. To just show her what it felt to be cared about instead of used. But she was so brainwashed into thinking she didn’t matter, that she was nothing more than a throwaway doll, that she couldn’t see it.

  Ponyboy wrapped his arms around him.

 “We can’t keep lettin’ her live there, Darry,” he said.

 “I know that, Pony, but unless she wants to leave there isn’t anythin’ we can do,” Darry said, “I’m goin’ to go make her somethin’ to eat.”

  That was a normal routine when Anni came over all beaten up. She normally wouldn’t have eaten for two days before the beating. I had asked her why she didn’t eat two days in advance and she told me that it helped her not throw up when her dad kicked her in the stomach. Once more breaking my heart as I heard her tell me that she could anticipate when the beating was coming and how to make it hurt less.

 I followed Darry into the kitchen, Steve and Ponyboy trailing behind me. He was already getting all of the sandwich stuff out, dinner having been served a while ago and with all of us here, there were no leftovers. I grabbed the mustard off the table and watched Pony take out some bread before spreading the yellow condiment on her sandwich. We worked in silence, not sure what we could say to one another. Darry was right; unless Anni wanted to leave her parents, to have a better life, there wasn’t much we could do.

   As soon as we finished making her sandwich, and Steve added half a pickle to the plate, Anni came walking in while drying her hair with the towel. She was wrapped in nothing but a towel. In the kitchen light I could see her bruises more prominent.

  “Soda, can I borrow some clothes?” She inquired.

 “Sure thing, doll,” I said, rinsing my hands off and following her to my room.

   I opened the drawer and took out a pair of gray sweatpants and a black wife beater that revealed a lot on the side. It was something I wore around the house when it was hot.

  “You know, Pony has clothes that might fit you better,” I joked.

 “Yeah, probably,” she laughed, “but they aren’t as comfortable as yours.”

  I handed the clothes to her, looking at her beaten up face. I frowned.

 “Does it hurt?” I whispered.

 “No more than it normally does,” she shrugged, “can you close the door on your way out? Please, and thank you.”

  Nodding my head, I left the room and closed the door behind me. Anni came out five minutes after wearing the sweats and wife beater I’d given her. It was much bigger on her than I’d expected, revealing all of her sides and if she moved her arms a certain way you could see the side of her breast. She wasn’t wearing a bra, not that she needed one because her breasts were small and perky.

  A lump formed in my throat as I watched her. I had to force myself to look away. She plopped down on the recliner, throwing her legs over the arm of the chair as Darry walked in with her sandwich. He handed it to her and smiled.

 “Eat up, kid,” he said.

 “Thank you,” she said, smiling back.

Soon the rain went away; Darry had gone to sleep an hour ago, having to get up for work in the morning. Pony had fallen asleep on the floor beside Johnny, Dally left with Two-Bit to a party that was close by, and Steve was sprawled out beside me completely knocked out. His mouth was partially opened which made me laugh a little.

  Anni was still awake. She walked over to me, her arms folded over her chest.

  “Want to come outside with me?” She asked, “I need to smoke.”

 “Sure, come on,” I said, standing up carefully not to wake Steve or the others.

  I closed the door behind us and she shivered. The rain had made the air incredibly cold, and she was hardly wearing anything. Her pale skin glowed in the darkness, and in the small, illuminating porch light, I noticed that her nipples were erected.

 “Come on,” I said, leading her to Darry’s truck.

  We climbed into the backseat. I reached to the front and grabbed the spare keys underneath the visors. I turned the truck on and let the heater kick in so we could warm up. Anni was digging through her bag, removing a lighter and a container out. I watched her open the container and take out a joint. Anni didn’t smoke cigarettes, couldn’t stand the taste, but she did smoke weed and I was pretty sure it was because it numbed her from everything. I watched her light her joint and hit it, a cloud of smoke releasing from her perfect, soft, pink lips. The smell of weed collecting in the car and I knew I was going to have to air it out before we went in. Darry had the nose of a hound.

  She looked over at me and held out the joint, “want some?”

  “No thanks, doll,” I smiled.

  Shrugging her shoulders, she continued to smoke the joint. Her unwounded eye turned hazy and became a bit red. With each puff, she was getting higher and higher; this obviously not being the first time she smoked tonight. She slouched down in her seat, the shirt riding up a little bit. I guess I’d been staring too long because she faced me and raised her eyebrow.

  “Why do you keep staring at me like that?” She questioned.

 “Just takin’ in all of your wounds,” I whispered, half lying.

  She let her eyes land on the bruises decorating her arm before dropping it and taking another hit of her joint.

  “You know, I’m use to it but they still hurt like hell.”

  “You shouldn’t be use to it,” I muttered, “I hate seein’ you like this, Anni.”

  Anni put out her smoke, putting it back in her purse and folding her arms, “why?”

  “Because I care about you. Every time I see you all bruised up like this, it pisses me off. I swear if I ever see your dad-”

  “You’ll do nothing.”

  Our eyes met; hers cold, and distant, mine shocked, and sad.

  “If you do something it’ll only make it worse. I’ll just get beaten ten times worse than the last. He’ll do everything in his power to prove he’s got total control over me, and he’s right.”

  I reached over and touched her shoulder. She flinched a bit but I didn’t pull away; her skin was cool to the touch, the heater barely keeping her warm. Anni sighed.

 “It’s just how it is, Soda. Leave it be.”

  “How can I do that?” I asked, “you don’t deserve it.”

 “Because I’m not important, Soda!” She snapped, “if I left today, all of you would stop thinking about me! If I died tomorrow, you’d forget me as soon as you saw the next girl walk by! I’m replaceable! A nobody! Unloved!”

 “You aren’t unloved!” I yelled back, “and maybe to your shitty dad you're replaceable, but to me you’re irreplaceable! You’re so fucked up in the head, you don’t even know what love is because they’ve got you all messed up.”

  “So?! What do you want me to do about it!”

 “Let me show you what it’s like to be loved, Anni.”

  She started nibbling on her lip as I got closer to her. She didn’t move away from me though, as I leaned in closer and closer. The air between us almost felt thin, I could hardly breathe. I could see her chest moving up and down fast. Was she nervous? Scared? I couldn’t tell. My forehead pressed against hers.

  “I’ll stop if you want,” I whispered, “I’d never do somethin’ to you that you aren’t comfortable with.”

  It took her a moment to answer and when she was capable of doing so, it came out as more of a hushed whisper.

 “I’m fine,” her voice croaked, “you can continue.”

She was definitely nervous. My words, along with my actions, had her flustered and confused.

Nodding my head, I pressed my lips against hers. Her lips were just as soft as I’d imagined them to be. When I pulled away, it was only for a second, going back into and kissing her deeply once again, this time more passionately. I softly pushed her back, keeping my lips on hers, and crawled between her legs. Her hands reached up and wrapped around my neck, her fingers tangling themselves into my hair. A soft groan left my lips as I felt her fingers tug gently.

   I pulled away from her, a small amount of saliva pulling from our lips. Her eyes were hazy with lust and confusion.

  “I’ve got you, doll,” I whispered, “I promise.”

  She nodded her head. Leaning back down, I attached my lips to her neck and started leaving wet, open mouthed kisses along the nape. Softly sucking and nibbling on her flesh, I felt my cock harden at the sound of her breathy moans. A sound that I wanted to be familiar with forever. I bit down on her neck and she gasped, jolting forward, her chest pressing against mine. Her nipples were still hard. I swirled my tongue around the spot I bit down on before biting down on a different spot, repeating the process.

  “Soda,” she whimpered.

  It was the first time I’ve heard her sound so vulnerable.

  “That’s a good girl,” I praised, returning my attention to her face.

  The black eye didn’t bother me, neither did the blood in her eye. She was as beautiful as she always was.

  I grabbed the rim of my shirt and pulled it off, revealing my tanned chest. Her eyes lingered a little lower, her teeth biting her bottom lip while she scanned over my body. I chuckled then reached for her shirt. She lifted her arms letting me pull the shirt over her head, revealing her exposed, bruised flesh. I groaned at the mere sight of her breasts. They were perfect; like beautiful clouds. I barely licked one of the hardened nipples and her back arched, eyes rolling to the back of her head. I captured her lips with mine once again, this time kissing her hungrily.

  I pulled her off the seat and into my lap, breathing heavily as I started kissing down her neck again, tracing the purple hickeys I had left. My hands fumbled with my zipper first, my cock aching to be released from their restraints. Not bothering to lift her off of me, I lifted myself off the seat a bit and pulled my jeans down. Anni wrapped her arms around me, tugging my hair a bit as she kissed me hard. I grabbed the sweats she was wearing and dragged them down, my hands grazing her bare skin causing her to shiver. I loved watching her shiver after I touched her. It didn’t happen often with Anni, she hardly ever reacted to anyone touching her, so to see, to feel, her shake from my touch sent a rush of pride through me.

  Anni lifted herself off of my lap as I pulled her sweats all the way off. She was completely naked in front of me now.

  “God damnit, Anni,” I groaned, “so fucking beautiful.”

 A soft laugh left her lips as she watched me pull my boxers down finally releasing my growing member. There was no need to wait any longer, no need for foreplay, no need for me to poke and prod to make sure she was okay. We were both ready as if we'd been waiting for years. I lined myself up with her and pushed her down onto me, groaning at the feeling of her tight walls gripping me. Anni buried her head into my shoulder and moaned softly at the feeling of me filling her up. Only a second passed before I started thrusting my hips back and forth, our skin slapping against each other’s. Small pants were leaving her mouth as she gripped my shoulders tightly, keeping herself upright despite being drilled into. Even though I wasn’t going too fast right now, the position allowed me to bury myself deep into her sweet little cunt.

   “Holy fuck,” I moaned, “that’s it baby.”

  My pace quickened as she started bouncing herself up and down; the truck started to rock a bit at the movement happening inside but we didn’t care. Anni’s moans became more erotic and lewd; she sounded almost angelic and I loved that I was the one making her feel this way. Her head fell back as she continued to ride my cock, meeting each thrust coming from me. I moved my left hand up to the back of her head and pulled her hair a little, just enough to get her to face me. I didn’t want to hurt her. She moaned at the feeling of me pulling her hair.

  “Fuck, Anni, you sound so beautiful,” I groaned, pulling her closer by her hair so that our foreheads could meet, “such a beautiful girl for me, huh?”

  She could only nod, her body shivering.

  “Soda, I’m close,” she whimpered out.

  “Let it go, baby,” I moaned, “I’ve got you.”

 Those words with the quickening pace of our thrust sent Anni into euphoria. She screamed out, her legs violently shaking as she came all over my cock. I held her in place; one hand gripping her side while the other stayed tangled in her hair. I removed my hand from her back and smacked her perfectly, plump, sweaty ass. She yelped, rocking her hips into mine causing me to groan. Giving her ass a few more smacks, enough to pleasure her, I turned us over so that I was on top of her. My eyes danced across her sweaty body. I started pouring kisses onto her face and mumbling soft “I love you’s” as I continued to thrust into her faster.

  “Soda,” she moaned, “I can’t.”

  “Shh,” I whispered, holding back a string of curse words, feeling her walls tighten around me, “you can do it baby. Come on.”

   I slammed into her repeatedly; removing my cock all the way at the tip and then slamming back into her. Her eyes rolled back as her hips arched. I could feel myself getting closer to my climax as I watched her, feeling her dripping cunt swallow me over and over again.

  “Cum one more time for me,” I cooed, “I know you’ve got it in you.”

 Anni couldn’t form any more words, all she could do was nod her head and let me coax her with my sweet words. Soon her body spasmed again and her legs shook harshly. Her screams rippled through the air, but I didn’t bother covering her mouth to hide them. I didn’t care if people heard and I didn’t care if that caused people to come over to see what was happening; all I wanted was to be focused on Anni.

  “Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum,” I croaked.

  My thrust becoming sloppier, I watched her body go limp as pools of sweat collected on her chest. I thrusted into her three more times before spilling my cum into her fleshy, pink walls. Coating every inch.

  “Fuck!” I yelled, “oh my God, fuck!”

  I stopped moving, unable to ride out my high for too long. Anni was panting hard. I pulled myself out of her and brought her to my chest. Rubbing soft circles onto her bruised back as she gasped for air.

  “I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.”

   When Anni finally did catch her breath, she rested her head against my bare, sweaty chest. A tired smile appeared on my face as I watched her look up at me.

  “My baby did so well,” I praised again.

  We stared into each other’s eyes for what felt like a lifetime. Her glistening skin glowed in the moonlight, the cool air chapping her dry lips making her lick them repeatedly, her breast heaving up and down as she took in large amounts of air. Her black hair was not sweaty and clinging to her beautiful face. I reached my hand down and stroked the bruise on her cheek.

  “I love you, Anni,” I whispered, “so fuckin’ much. You’ll never be replaceable to me. I only want you.”

  Anni chuckled and closed her eyes, she was definitely sleepy.

  “I’ll hold you to that, Soda. If you love me, maybe I can let myself love you too. It may take a while but I’ll do it for you.”

  Grabbing the blanket that Darry normally kept inside his truck, I draped it over us and sighed. She buried her head into my chest and let her heavy eyes close. The sound of my heart lulling her to sleep.

  “No matter how long it takes,” I said, “I’ll wait for you. I’ll help you love again because you deserve it. That and the world.”

   The sudden realization of Darry coming out in the morning to see us asleep, naked in his car with the lingering smell of sex, hit me. A low chuckle escaped from my lips. I knew I was gonna hear it in the morning, but right now, I didn’t care. It felt like it was just Anni and I, all alone. That’s what I wanted.

[r0und3bitch]

Twin Flames ❤️‍🔥: Part 3 - Chains Around My Demons

Series Masterlist

Part 3 Soundtrack

Warnings: swearing, excessive drug use, overdose, mentions of death. 

Word Count: 8.4k

Notes: Fair warning, parts of this are heavy. ❤️❤️‍🩹💔I promise the end is nothing but fluff though! Buckle up besties, Part 4 is going to be NUTS. Honestly the story really goes balls wild after this so prepare yourselves in general! Please let me know what you think, love you all so very very much! 

“Well look who finally decided to show up!”

All of the boys turn towards where Topper is yelling, seeing Noah speeding hazardously, weaving the golf cart through the other people out on the course, earning a few shouts and yells in the process.  

Rafe just chuckles as he pauses from teeing up as if he has all the time in the world… like there aren't at least three other groups behind them, patiently waiting…

“My bad, boys…” Noah’s flying out of the cart now, pushing his dark locks out of his face as he almost sprints over. “Thought tee time was at noon, not eleven!”

His face was stained pink, sweat beading down his forehead already in the morning heat as the sun started to peek through the clouds.

“Eli’s been swinging for ya… your loss bro!” Kelce laughs as Noah groans.

“Late Night?” Topper asks him with a wink.

“Ugh… not in the way you think.”

Rafe casually strolls away from swinging to join the conversation. Behind them, the group waiting grows irritated.

“The Hargroves - (registering Toppers confused face) - the people my Dad had in town this weekend. (Topper nods) They’re old family friends. Fucking relentless, dude… they have a son around our age who’s a total fucking twat. Had to listen to him talk about his time at Harvard all fucking night. Jesus Christ…. Thought my sister was going to gouge his eyeballs out all through dinner. They flew out this morning, thank god.”

“So your sister —”

“Yo!” A loud yell comes from the group behind them. “You gonna fucking golf or just sit around like a bunch of chicks talking –”

Rafe swings the golf club out of his hand so fast that it hits the ground with a grotesque thud.

“THE FUCK did you just say!?” He’s already taken a few large strides but is shocked to see Noah’s a few steps ahead of him, his face now beat red as he flies off the rails, ready to go to bat for Rafe in an instant.

“You got a fucking problem, asshole?” Noah’s voice is a growl as his fists ball into the guy's shirt before Rafe can reach him, roughly shoving him back as the guy's friends circle around.

“Yeah, I do, actually!” He looks hesitant though as he clocks Noah towering just slightly over his height.

“You sure about that mother fucker?” Noah’s nose to nose with the guy now as one of his friends attempts to pull him back as he clocks Rafe.

“Yo, dude, stop, do you know who’s son that is?” His friend hisses into his ear, trying to pull him back as he whispers something inaudible.

The guy's face goes slack as Noah laughs rudely. Rafes just behind him, ready to follow on his move.

“No, no. We’re good….”

“That’s what I fucking thought, Bitch.” Rafe hisses as he taps Noah’s arm.

Rafe is no stranger to Noah’s temper, having been in too many fights with him already since their new formed friendship. He knows him well enough now to know that once Noah reaches a certain level, there’s a point of no return.

Noah shoves the guy backward again, ramming him into his friend and he laughs again.

“We good, fellas?” You hear Kelce warn from behind.

“Yeah…” Noah grins and turns back to his friends like he’s having the time of his life. “We’re good…”

Rafe and Noah stride back over to their hole when he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket, face heating up when he registers not only your name on his screen but the picture too. The picture he’d drunkenly changed your contact ID photo to the other day…

He brings the phone up to his ear.

“Hello?”

“Ugh, dude, common!” Topper groans when he sees Rafe answer the phone. “You’ve been up to swing now –”

“Hey…” He can almost hear you smile through the phone.

“Hey! What’s up, Y/N/N?” He asks patiently as his friends have no choice but to stand around and wait. Rafe sees Noah move to grab his club. (“Snooze ya lose, Cameron. Suck it!”)

“Uh, nothing, what’re you up to?”

“Oh, ya know,  just kicking your brother's ass at golf while he tries to just kick everyone else’s ass in general!” Rafe’s keeping it playful even though he’s the one that just instigated the fight.

“Sounds about right… guess that’s why I heard him just fly out of here a bit ago!”

“Yeah, being fashionably late must be a shared Y/L/N trait…”

“Ouch…!”

“Rafe, common, Bro!” Topper yells behind him, the irritation in his friend's voice clear.

“Uh, I can let you go though. I didn’t know you were golfing, it’s –”

“No, uh. What’s up, Y/N/N?” He asks again and there’s a pause on your end.

“Nothing, I was, uh…. Actually, I was going to see if you wanted to grab lunch with me...” Your voice comes out softly; the uncertainty behind it catching Rafe by surprise.

“But like I said, don’t worry about it, I didn’t realize you were golfing or I wouldn’t have –”

“I’ll pick you up in thirty minutes.”

“No, Rafe, really, it’s –”

But Rafe isn’t taking no for an answer. He’s already clocking exactly how many minutes he has to shower back at Tanneyhill, calculating the drive time too so that he can be within your presence within the allotted time.

“I’ll be outside your house in thirty minutes, Y/N.”

“Rafe –”

His final words are reserved for just you, careful to not let his friends, or your brother, hear them.

“See you soon, pretty girl.”

He hangs up the phone, biting back the eye roll he wants to give himself at his own actions.

What the actual fuck is he doing right now? He has not a single fucking clue.

Rafe is already compiling his stuff together when he registers Noah’s all too knowing cocky grin.

“Tell my sister I said hi….”

Topper looks between Rafe and Noah, almost yelling when he finally registers who he was talking to on the phone and why he’s leaving.

“Dude, you’re fucking kidding me right!? You’re actually leaving? We are only on the fourth hole!”

“Noah can fill in for me.”

“Woooohoooo” Kelce lowly whistles. “I truly never thought I’d see the day…”

Rafe rolls his eyes.

“That a girl finally fucking got to Rafe mother fucking Cameron…”

“Has hell froze over?” Eli laughs as he swats Kelce’s arm.

“What happened to bros before hoes?!” Topper drunkenly yells at his friend.

Noah’s cackles as he chugs his beer. “Well he’s landed the queen of all hoes with my sister!”

Topper turns wildly at Noah, questioning him, making him throw his hands up in the air defensively.

“Respectfully! Fuck; she’s my god damn sister, I can say that about her…”

Rafe just shakes his head, surprisingly unbothered by Noah’s comment.

“I’m out, boys!”

“Yeah… out of your damn mind…” he hears Topper groan as Rafe walks away from his friends in haste, eager to reach his truck, each step he takes bringing him closer to you.

       He pulls into your driveway exactly twenty eight minutes later. You’re already sitting out front when he pulls up, his heart fluttering at the fact that you were waiting for him.

His whole demeanor shifts when he takes you in. Each time Rafe sees you, it’s like he’s seeing a new version of you, your wardrobe and fashion choices always fully pulling him in, demanding his complete and undivided attention as they gave subtle clues about the woman they adorned.

Your usual attire is traded today for a pair of cutoff jean shorts and oversized band t-shirt, the look creating a soft glow around you as you hop into his truck, the sun circling your figure like an actual halo.

Shit I should’ve opened her door for her… wait what?!

“Right on time…” you smile as you pull the seat belt over your figure.

Instinctively, he reaches his arm across the back of your seat, unable to look away from you, registering a certain softness to you in this moment that makes him want to pull you closer.

He smiles back as he reaches his hand over to slowly stroke your cheek once with his index finger, shocking both of you before retreating it back to rest on your seat.

“What sounds good for lunch?”

“Mmmmmm…” You purse your lips together thoughtfully as your face scrunches together, taking only a moment or two before confidently replying. “Pizza.”

He can’t help but grin back at you and your complete decisiveness. It’s one of the things that Rafes learning he loves most about you: Your unwavering ability to know exactly what you want.

“I know just the place…here.” He hands you his phone as you hesitantly take it. “Put on some music.”

Your heart swells as you quickly punch in some words and hit play.

He tries to contain himself when he hears the song, unable to help himself as he bites down on his lip.

He knew you’d play Drake….

It’s a short drive to the pizza place.

Only when you hop out of his truck does he register the sneakers you’re wearing…totally offsetting the otherwise laid back outfit he’d scanned earlier.

He’d heard Kelce go on and on about the extremely limited edition release and how astronomically expensive they were, wishing more than anything he could see Kelce’s facial reaction to seeing you wear them.

It’s so uncanningly you, the subtle yet not so subtle “fuck you, I can have whatever I want” flashiness of it all, that Rafe can’t help but scan over your body once again, shamelessly admiring what he’s noticed earlier, only now having a new found appreciation for truly how great the shoes looked with the rest of your outfit.

When you enter, he doesn’t wait for a hostess and instead leads you over to the perfect table as if he owns the place.

It’s a fun place right on the beach that has music posters plastered all over it, seeming like the kind of place college kids would hang out at. There’s a few arcade games and pinball machines along the walls too that look like they’ve seen better days.

“This is definitely the best pizza place on the island…” you smile up at him as a middle aged waitress appears.

“Rafe Cameron!”

“Hi, Helena.” Rafes smile for the woman is warmer than you’d imagine.

“Your usual?” She asks, no pen and paper in sight.

“Yes, please. Oh, and two sides of ranch.”

She eyes him strangely at the request and he just winks at her before looking over to you.

“Anything to drink, sweetheart?” Helena asks you sweetly.

“Uh, I’ll take a Corona, please.”  

“Make that two…” Rafe adds as Helena nods and walks away. Of course Rafe doesn’t need a fake ID here…

You can’t help but look into his face for a moment. He catches you doing so, sneaking a glance into your eyes a few times but silently stares down at the table while he feels your eyes openly roam his face.

You’re lost in thought on how Rafe fits into a place like this, somewhere that seems to go against the grain of everything he represents. On how the waitress knew his order when you hear his soft voice.

“Hey…” you feel his fingers slide over the soft under skin on your forearm that’s sitting on the table. “Y/N/N…”

His voice is smooth as sunshine as it pulls you out of your thoughts as the world around you comes back into focus, your vision set on Rafes near perfect face.

His eyes, so blue it sends a chill down your spine. His lips, ever so slightly parted, the bottom one slightly puffed out, making you think about how soft it would be between yours, how sweet he would taste…

He smiles knowingly, on to the fact that you’re in a complete daze, your eyes unabashedly raking in his whole face as he happily lets you, enjoying the way your features are so focused on him.

He sees the exact moment you come back to your senses, a quick jolt running through your face, as he sees you shake your head and cough.

Fuck, how long have I been staring at him like that?!

Based on the way his eyes are set on you, you’re assuming way longer than you’d hoped.

“What’re you thinking about…” he asks softly.

How every single part of your stupidly perfectly sculpted face is making it so hard to concentrate. How good it would feel to run my hands through your hair, to rest them on either side of your face as your lips finally touched mine - OH MY GOD, STOP!

You suck in a deep breath to try and shake the thoughts away, no easy feat when you realize his fingers are still neatly resting on your arm on the table.

There's about a million things running through your mind but land on what’s directly in front of you.

“So, you’re like a regular here, huh?”

He laughs but there’s something reserved about the smile he gives you.

“Yeah I guess you could say that… I’ve been coming here for as long as I can remember…”

“Kind of surprising…” you say as you glance around at the various posters, all crooked and hanging on by a thread, the interior of the building having lived through a lot of memories. “Doesn’t really strike me as your kind of place.”  

More out of habit than anything, Rafe begins to fidget with the bracelet on your wrist as he smiles up at you, surprised by how ready he’s able to release the words.

“My mom loved this place. Used to bring us here a lot when we were little…”

Your lips part as you stare blankly into his face that’s so intensely set on yours, unsure of what to say. For not having a mother of your own, you’d think you’d be way less awkward in situations like this, but nonetheless, his words leave you stunned, not even remotely sure what your next words should be.

“I still bring Wheezie here a bit… mainly take out though. Like I said, best pizza on the island…” he smiles down at you again.

“That’s uh, that’s really sweet of you.”

Rafe’s face falters for a moment.

“I’m sure she appreciates that more than you know…”

He laughs easily. “I’m sure she’s appreciative in her own Wheezie way. She’s tough to gauge –”

“No I meant…” you cough, glancing away from Rafe’s gaze. “I meant, I’m sure your mom appreciates that… if you said she loved this place…”

Time stops for a moment as you watch Rafe’s eyes melt into a look you hadn’t seen before, your own words now leaving him stunned. No one ever really talked about his mother, let alone still referred to her as a once living and breathing person.

You offer him an encouraging smile, seeing the way your words are affecting him. Rafe never talks about his mother to anyone so he’s surprised when he feels his mouth moving on its own accord again.

“I hope she does…in some ways I think it’s harder on Wheezie when I bring her here. She was too young. It’s hard to miss someone you never really knew…”

Rafes feels too safe in the moment to register his choice of words until it’s too late. The second they leave his mouth, he looks at you in panic. You register the moment his eyes go wide, wanting to punch himself in the face, as he now grows worried.

Little information has been shared with him but he knows your mother died shortly after having you and Noah.

What the fuck. Why would you say that to her?!

“I didn’t mean that –”

He looks terrified as you quickly reach for his arm now, gripping it tightly.

“Rafe, it’s okay. For real. You’re right.” He regrets ever opening his mouth when he has to hear you say the next words, no matter how truthful they are for you. “It is really hard to miss someone you never knew…”

His heart drops to his feet.

At that moment Helena comes back with the beers, setting one in front of each of you before delivering the most delicious looking pizza you’d ever seen in front of you.

Rafe watches as your eyes go wide, taking in the sight, smiling like an idiot at the action.

“Holy shit…” you’re practically drooling as you take in the toppings.

“So your usual is…”

“Double pepperoni with Jalapenos on half. Wheezie can’t handle any spicy food at all. I order it more out of habit than anything, even if she’s not eating it…”

For some reason knowing this little unnecessary tidbit of information makes your chest feel warm, heat rising in your face thinking about the obvious care Rafe puts into his relationship with Wheezie, someone you’re growing to care about yourself.

As you stare at the pizza slice Rafe is grabbing, and setting on your plate, a memory floats to the surface.

“Hey, do you remember a week or two ago at Kelce’s when we were talking about best drunk foods –”

Rafe steps in to finish your sentence.

“And you gave a fifteen minute speech about the significant difference between regular ass pepperoni and the beloved “grease cups” as you called them that curl up….”

Your mouth fully falls open and Rafe feels entirely too proud to be able to shock you like that.

“Yeah, I remember…” He grins at you as he slides the plate and sides of ranch over to you as you stare hungrily at the curled up pepperoni topping the pizza.

You grab the bigger slice of the two and bring it to your mouth, taking an entirely too big bite as you reach for a napkin.

“Holy fuck…” It arguably might be one of the best pizzas you’ve ever had.

“I know…”

Rafe has never, by any means of the words, been someone who holds real conversation. Sure, he bullshits around with the guys, he can work a room when in business meetings with his father and had absolutely no problems charming the hell out of any girl he wanted with his words. He’s beginning to realize that it’s completely different when it comes to you, though.

He doesn’t ever find silence between the two of you uncomfortable but instead finds himself wanting to fill it with words. Questions he’s mulled over, thoughts that have protruded his brain since the last time he saw you, memories he wants to tell you about.

It’s an unfamiliar feeling… to be so genuinely interested in something the way he had become taken over you. He’d often find himself wondering what you were up to throughout the day and had become less hesitant to pick up the phone when those feelings started to consume him.

He took a half of a second to pick one of the many thoughts swirling around in his brain as you two began to eat.

“So I hear you had a thrilling weekend… Harvard grad was it?”

You rolled your eyes heavily and swallowed the bite of pizza.

“Oh my god… that fucking twat!” You shook your head, “Did Noah tell you –”

Rafe listened intently as you launched into a story of your animated weekend with the Hargroves, fully giving the backstory of your family's long and entwined history. How your father and Mr. Hargrove had grown up together, eventually making a name for themselves within their wealthy rooted families around the same time frame. Their son, Nate, was the epitome of pretentiousness. You’d been forced to spend far too much time with the arrogant boy in your past, listening to him drone on and on about all the amazing things he was going to accomplish and all of the great things his relatives had achieved to lead him to this moment.

Rafe listened intently as you went on, asking all the questions that came to his mind in the process. It was a new feeling when you felt an unfamiliar blush creep up onto your cheeks the more you talked to him. You were by no means shy, especially not with Rafe at this point. You’d found it extremely easy to be in his presence, to talk freely with him. Yet, with each simple question he would ask, you’d feel the pink stain on your cheeks burn a little brighter.

After your third piece of pizza, you had to accept defeat.

“That was…. I think you’re right, best pizza on the island by far.” Yow throw your napkin over your plate.

“Glad you liked it.”

“Hey Rafe…” his eyes immediately lift when he hears the way you’re saying his name. “You know you really didn’t need to leave golfing with your friends though, right?”

He laughs but regrets it when your face remains the same, set in a serious way with your eyebrow furrowed.

“Y/N, it’s really not that big of a deal. I golf with them all the time. It was just us dicking around on the course. And Noah squaring up with some dude - kind of my fault though –”

“Sounds about right…” you look up at Rafe and your eyes are twinkling mischievously, making him inhale deep.

“You didn’t have to leave your friends to come see me, though.”

His easy response seems like the most obvious answer.

“I’d rather be with you, anyway.”

Totally not recognizing the significance until the words leave his mouth…. the embarrassment, the tension he expected to feel after never comes…

For as much as Rafe is fully aware he can fly off the handles at any moment, he’s truly shocking himself by how grounded he’s stayed this entire time. He’s finding it hard to have his usual fight or flight response when this seems so wholeheartedly right.

You can feel the energy coming off of Rafe and it’s shocking you. Whereas he seems entirely too calm and collected, his words have hit you like a bus, all but too aware that your raw emotions are written all over your face. Including your now beat red blush that’s sure to stain your face for eternity at this point.

Rafe watches as your lips fully part and then snap closed again, enjoying watching the heat creep into your face as he resists the urge to say something stupid.

As much as his response has thwarted you, you take this as your in to address what you really wanted to talk to him about. To talk to him about what had been eating away at you all weekend. What had consumed your thoughts throughout all of the dinners and meetings you’d had to endure the past few days with the Hargroves and their pretentious son.

“There is, um….” Your gaze shifted between the table and his eyes again. “There is something I kept thinking about over the weekend though…”

He nods for you to continue.

“The other night…”

His mind travels back in time to you cradled against him, the feeling of your soft breath against his neck as you fell asleep in his arms.

“What about it?” He hopes his tone is encouraging and not accusing.

Please don’t say you regret it. Please don’t pull away.

“I… um…” When he sees you puff your cheeks out and shakily release the breath, he can tell how nervous you are.

“Y/N….”

“Well first off I wanted to say thank you…”

He winces slightly but hopes you don’t notice too much.

Thank you?

“Y/N… you really don’t need to thank me for that…”

“Rafe…” he notices the way you'd said his name in the same tone and wondered if you’d noticed too or just did it out of habit.

“You literally found me passed out and incoherent in your bed from taking too many drugs…I think on some level a thank you is in order here.”  

“It’s me, Y/N, you don’t need to be embarrassed –”

He goes to argue back but stops at how soft your voice comes out now, telling him you’re really trying to get something off your chest.

“Rafe…”

You’re trying so hard to make sense of the thoughts you’re trying to say.

“That’s not it…”

Fuck it, tell him. Be honest. Well…. somewhat honest.

“I’m not… I’m not embarrassed about that…”

He wants so badly to question what the fuck that is but you continue talking.

When he hears the deep breath you suck in he knows you’re gearing up to release it all, ready to hear the thoughts that have clearly tormented your brain all weekend.

“Listen, I don’t usually take shit like that…..”

Unsure what to say now that you’ve started speaking, knowing it sounds like you’re excusing your shitty behavior “yeah, I only take the GOOD drugs” realizing how fucking stupid you’d  sound.

Somehow, some way though, he gets it, understanding where you’re going.  

“Sometimes… it all just becomes too much though….” He finishes the thought for you.

“I don’t want to be that kind of person to you, though….”

He shakes his head, not sure if he hears you clearly.

“What do you mean, Y/N/N?” He asks softly.

“The kind of person who’s too fucked up to talk. Who you need to take care of…. Like that.”

Rafe doesn’t miss your clarification at the end, mulling it over in his brain on what exactly you mean by that.

“Y/N….” He’s trying so hard to carefully explain the thoughts aloud that are swarming around in his brain.

“You can be any version of yourself you need to be in front of me, okay? The good, the bad, the ugly. You’re not getting any judgment…. Certainly not from me of all people.” He scoffs.

Rafe feels a sense of pride in the way he was able to, for once in his whole entire life, care for something the way he was able to care for you the other night. He’s unwilling to let that pride go, needing you to know he’ll gladly do it again, over and over if you’d needed him to.

He knows that pain too well to let you suffer alone through it.

You still seem unsure, brows furrowed together, as you look down at the glass in front of you.

“Last summer…”

Holy shit why are you telling her this?

Ignoring the insecure voice in his head, he continues.

“Well… shit got out of hand.”

Your bright eyes were fully on him now, hanging at his every word.

“Listen, I’m not going to sit here and preach to you because…. I get it. I think you’ve been on this island long enough to know the effect it can have…” his eyes are cast downward for only a moment before rising back to you again, intent on ensuring you knew you weren’t alone in this. Even if that meant facing every fear he’s ever had by telling you this. He’d barely even spoken about it since it happened, unsure where to even begin…

“I was… gone. Beyond gone.” He laughed at the memory but there was no humor behind it.

“The partying. The drugs…. I let it consume me… until I was past the point of recognizing myself.”

You wanted to reach out and grab him, or to push that fucking piece of hair back and comfort him but you didn’t move a muscle, keeping your arms folded in front of you, almost protectively, as you’d done since he started talking.

“It wasn’t just me getting into fights anymore. It wasn’t just fun…. It was…” he took a deep breath to try and land on the right word. “It got really fucking ugly. I was in some pretty bad situations…”

“There was one night…. In August.”  

You froze, the sickening feeling rising up within you, realizing where this was going. The guilt was almost too much to bear. But not because you shared in a similar pain… but because you already knew the secret he was about to share with you.

“I was doing anything I could get my hands on at that point. The coke was just the tip of the iceberg….. the booze, the pills, the….”

He takes a deep breath to calm himself, still unbelieving he was saying this to you, literally spilling his darkest secrets in the middle of a pizza shop on a Monday afternoon.  

“Logan was throwing a huge party for one of the girls' birthdays. It was wild. Like…. One of those types of parties that’s so balls to the wall crazy that it only happens once in a blue moon. We’d been drinking all day, completely hammered. I truly can’t remember which I’d done more of, Tequila shots or lines of coke but they both kept coming. The guy I was getting my shit from at the time… real piece of fucking trash from the Cut.”  

Rafe sucks at his teeth menacingly as he remembers Barry’s smug face that night when Rafe had gone to re-up before the party.

“I had just re-upped before but hadn’t done any of the new shit that night, had too much left over from before. We were all fucking coked out of our minds before I even opened that bag.”

His voice grows shaky and he fidgets with the ring on his finger now.

“I had already fucking fought Eli that night…” your eyes grow wide, Eli being one of the most relaxed, easy going people you’d ever met.

“I know…” he falters at your expression. “I was a fucking asshole.” He laughs. “I’m still a fucking asshole –”

“Rafe –”  you jump in to defend him, finally uncrossing your arms as he raises his hand gently.

“Wait, let me finish.”  

He sees that stubborn look in your eye and thinks you’re going to fight back for a second but instead you just give a little shake of your head to encourage him on.  

“Eli’s face had a huge bloody gash on it. My dad was already bailing me out left and right…. No one wanted to be within ten feet of me. I wouldn’t have wanted to be around me.”

The urge to reach out to him or defend him again pulses through you, even if what he’s saying are facts. He’s been so patient with you that you tighten your arms harshly around you as you bite back your tongue.

“Like I said, we were already coked out of our minds but I wasn’t taking no for an answer. I opened the other bag and when no one wanted to keep going I-I lost it.”

“Topper tried to calm me down but it was no use, all I could see was red. I pushed him into the coffee table so hard, the glass shattered…. It took a whole group of guys to get me off him…. My best friend.”

The guilt threatens to consume him, risking a look into your eyes. He’d expected to see them wide, maybe surprised or scared at what he’s telling you. Instead, when he looks up into them, he feels that feeling again like warm liquid courage is being pumped into him, encouraging him to keep going, creating a safe space for him to do so even if you’re internally dying hearing it.

“I’d never seen Kelce so mad. Hit me square in the jaw himself. I deserved it though…. Threw my ass in the car and screamed at me all the way to Tanneyhill…”

While he took a pause, you’d known he wasn’t done with his story yet… he hadn’t reached the detail you were already privy to and as you sensed it coming you prayed you’d be able to keep your cool demeanor to not give away your own secrets…

“We almost crashed the car on the way… I was out of control. We’d both been drinking…it was bad…. When we finally pulled up, I ran straight into my bathroom and locked myself in. I’d felt that fucking bag in my pocket the whole way and even though the pills I’d taken hours previously were already kicking my ass…. It didn’t matter.”  

You can do this, Rafe. Keep going. Tell her.

He’d never said these exact details of what happened next aloud to anyone, had hardly let his brain even remotely touch those memories, far too painful to bear.

“I heard Kelce banging on the door but all I had tunnel vision on was the bag I’d dumped onto the counter. The second I did it…..”

Fuck…your stomach clenches trying to block your mind from touching any memories of your own birthday this past year as Rafe reveals it all, hoping you’ll be strong enough to make it through this conversation without losing it.

You’d already all but lost it the first time you had heard it…..

“I was three lines in by the time I knew something wasn’t right… my vision blurred. And the next few minutes… well, I think they’re probably the worst moments of my life…”

“I don’t know what happened first… collapsing… vomiting… the bleeding…”

Breathe, Y/N, breathe.

But you can’t. It’s like all the breath is being sucked from your lungs. It’s like you’re being transported back in time, back to Miami, back to that night, back to your birthday….back to hell.

“It’s all a blur….When I stopped responding…Kelce busted down the bathroom door and found me…. Like that on the floor.”

Rafe spares you the details he’d only heard and remembered in pieces. The convulsing, the vomit he was covered in, the blood seeping from his nose, the gash on his head as he made his way to the floor….

“Topper had blown over to the house, ready to fucking end me for fighting him… he walked into all… he was the one to call 911”

Tell him. Say something. Fucking TELL HIM.

And while there were a thousand words you could say that would only bring your shared connection even further, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it, couldn’t bring yourself to admit you’d let it go this far. Not at all willing to cross that bridge yet as to the situations that led you to this current moment.

“The guy I was getting my shit from - Barry, had cut the coke with something intentionally… in retaliation for some deal gone south that I had caused…” his mind only allowing him to touch the thought for a split second. “Had everyone else listened to me and actually started doing lines with me like I’d begged…”

Your stomach turns and you threaten to spill your pizza back up across the table as your mind pieces it together. Rafe has been so strong for you though that you choke it down as hard as you can, no matter the costs. He deserves you to be strong for him, too.

“We’d probably not be having this conversation right now…”

You want to say something so badly but it’s like you’ve forgotten every word in the English language. Spanish too, not that it’d help you in this moment.

“The point I’m trying to make…I’m not that guy anymore. Or at least I try really fucking hard not be like that….”

He looks at you dead in the eye, knowing on some level you need to hear the next words from him so badly.

“But, I’m also not going to sit here and pretend I’m some kind of saint. I’m not… fucking far from it. None of that shit ever really fully stopped…”

His eyes are so gentle as he continues, almost begging you to understand you’re not alone in this.

“I’m still me. The part of me that’s always going to be that way. And you’re you… and that’s more than enough…”

For a moment there’s nothing but silence as the two of you look at each other.

Rafe sees the tears pool in your eyes but you will them not to spill over, refusing to blink or you’ll be done for.

“Y/N…”

That’s all it takes. His voice saying your name. You have absolutely no idea what the hell you’re doing but your body is moving with gravity, it’s pull set on Rafe as he feels you fall into his lap. A few people look around at you two with scrutinizing faces but you both could care less and as you wrap your arms around him.

You wouldn’t let this boy spill his heart out to you without making him know it was all worth it. Without comforting him. Without telling him too, it’s going to be okay. Right?

Before you can however, he’s already whispering into your ear.

“Promise me one thing, though? For real?”

“Hmm?” Afraid he’ll all but hear the tears that are coming dangerously close to spilling over as he presses you closer to him, the feeling incomparable to anything you’ve ever felt.

“You’ll call me next time you feel like that? Like you promised when you left the other day…”

That’s when you feel the first tear fall down your cheek.

“I did…” you choke out.

“What…?”

“I called you today…” and as you guiltily bury your head into his shoulder he feels the tears silently soak through his shirt, slowly realizing what you’re saying.

You called him. You called him on the golf course. You called because…

“Y/N…” his voice is thick with emotion as he makes an attempt to look at you, but you’re unwilling to pry yourself out of the safety of the crook of his neck.

“I’m sorry –” the words barely come out.

“Don’t.” His voice is gentle but definitive. Only now realizing in this exact moment that you trust him. He told you to call… and you did.

“I’ve got you, Y/N/N…”

He continues to hold you while you cry into his shoulder in the middle of a pizza shop on a Monday afternoon….

……

      The 4th of July was no small event on Figure Eight. It was one of the biggest of the year, just behind Midsummers, an event that sounded as ridiculous as the name.

Every year, Kildare Island hosted a two day carnival leading up to the holiday, ending in a massive firework display for the entire community.

In a town like this, everyone was only talking about the next best thing. Naturally, the only thing anyone had been discussing for several weeks was the carnival and the slew of bullshit that came with it.

The carnival was quite literally picture perfect. A Ferris Wheel, cotton candy, games. All the bells and whistles had been pulled out of the event.

When you all meet up at the carnival, you couldn’t help but b-line to Rafe. Thankfully, he’s next to Sarah so you’re hoping it doesn’t look too obvious. At this point though, you’re not really sure you care what it looks like if you’re being honest.

Sarah pulls you in for her typical, squeezing you to the point of pain hugs that you’ve grown so used to, as she demands you all go on the Ferris Wheel, right now, as the sun is setting in the most perfect way.

You’re thankful you’d remembered to bring your camera as you pulled it out of your bag, capturing some moments of all of you paused at the top of the wheel, the sunset no doubt casting the most gorgeous glow over all of you.  

When you get off, Rafe insists on buying you the cotton candy that’s twirled bigger than your entire head, holding it for you while you take bites out of it when the sugary pieces keep getting caught in your hair.

Sarah narrows her eyes at her brother, him catching her gaze for only a second but still reading the “what the fuck” look she's sending him.

Rafe doesn’t give a shit though. He’s enjoying spoiling you too much to really give a shit about anything if he’s being honest.

Kelce insists they go on a few rides but they only make it through two after Topper starts to look cautiously more green.

You, however, feel like you’re in a dream.

The sounds - the bangs and whistles of the carnival games, the screams of the riders, the faint sound of live music playing in the distance, Rafes voice telling you to hand him the cotton candy stick…

The smells - of freshly popped popcorn, of all the sweet treats wafting through the air, the scent of Rafes aftershave, the scent of him in general, as he moves closer to you, planting an arm around on your waist as he moves to help you safely off the ride…

The sights - the vibrant colors, the moving carnival rides holding passengers moving through the summer night air, the image of Rafe scooting closer to you while at the top of the Ferris Wheel, wrapping a single arm around your neck, using the other to swiftly turn your camera around, taking a selfie of you two as he pulls you closer to him…

Noah goes up to one of the booths for only a moment before coming back with several flasks of booze. Of course…

“Are you guys ready to go sit down for the fireworks?” He asks as he passes the flasks out.

“You guys go ahead… I need to pee.”

“We can wait,” Rafe speaks up.

“We only have a few minutes” Sarah whines, and we have a huge group -”

“Dont worry about it, I’ll only be a second. Go! Find us a spot. I’ll find you in a few minutes.”

You sprint to the bathroom, having drank one too many White Claws already. When you enter the fireworks display area, you realize you’d fully underestimated how big of a crowd there would be. There’s hundreds upon hundreds of people in front of you, panic starting to rise as you realize there’s only moments until it starts. You take several large steps through the crowd, craning your neck to find your friends as several people grow irritated. After a few moments you hear someone yell your name.

Turning, you see Sarah frantically waving.

THANK GOD.

You do your best to weave through the crowd but it’s no use, you’re basically stepping on people as you finally reach them, only to realize there's literally nowhere for you to go.

“Where am I supposed to – ?” The show starts as you hear people get visibly annoyed around you, panic building in you once again.

“C’mere, Y/N/N.”

You gasp lightly as you feel strong hands guide you down to the ground as his now familiar scent gives you butterflies. Every single inch of your body lights up at his touch as Rafe sets you down into his lap, arms wrapping securely around you, the swiftness of it all making you dizzy. You grab at his biceps to sturdy yourself and don’t miss how hard they feel as they grip around you, releasing a deep breath and let yourself melt into him, head lobing lazily back into his shoulder.

Your body feels so good in his lap and while he’s positive you feel it too, he’s him and he needs to hear it. He leans down and whispers into your ear so only you can hear.

“S’this okay?”

You look up at him,eyes wide, as the first firework goes off, lighting your face a brilliant shade of pink before fading to purple. On instinct, you reach up to quickly cup his cheek (his heart squeezes at the touch) as you nod your head up and down to signal “yes” to him over the loud explosions. You can’t help but tangle your arms within his to pull him closer around you, the action both putting him at ease and sending shockwaves to his heart.

Neither of you notice the “HOLY SHIT” look Kelce is currently throwing Topper, watching it all unfold before them. Rafe could give a fuck that everyone he knows his hurdled around him, missing some glares being thrown in your direction. The two of you however might as well be in your own world.

Your head stays leaned back on Rafes shoulder while you gaze up at the sky, closing your eyes for only a second to bask in how fucking amazing this feels to be this close to him, to feel the buzz of his body vibrate against yours, holding each other close as the fireworks go off.

Loud booms fill the air as vibrant colors erupt over the night sky, making Rafe fall in love with you in technicolor, swearing over and over that each new shade illuminated your beautiful face better than the last.

You take an opportunity of momentary darkness from the absence of fireworks to turn your face inward toward Rafe to plant a clear, deep kiss of your lips to the taught tender skin on his neck.

You don’t miss the gasp it elicits or the way his arms tense briefly around you, quickly pulling your lips back before anyone can see but not moving away any further as another firework rips through the darkness.

Staying half nuzzled into the crook of his neck, you press your nose into a new found sweet spot as he feels you trail it up as your lips nearly meet his ear, the action mixed with your warm breath so close on his skin giving him goosebumps all over his whole body.

“You feel so good, Rafe Cameron…”

Your voice is like velvet as he lets your words crash over him. He feels you relax back into him as he glances down to look you in the eye, searching heavily only to be met with that sweet genuine smile. The one that’s conveying all the words needed between you two of you including the ones he needs to hear most.

Your one smile says it all but he decides to twist your entire world and actually speak the words into existence.

“Let me make you feel even better, Y/N…”

No words. No air. No sense. Seconds pass by. Or is it minutes? Everything and nothing is happening at the same time as your brain turns to actual mush at his words. The smile tugging on his lips and his eyes so intently set on you are not helping in the slightest. Rafe can tell by your expression that he’s left you dumbfounded.

Parts of the reality start fading back to him. The fireworks going off, the hundreds of people surrounding the two of you, your brother Noah’s annoying smirking face (that just so fucking clearly says “I TOLD YOU SO, IDIOT” with one look) directly in his line of vision as he takes a quick glance around him.

Several sets of eyes are on the two of you still, somehow meeting Emma’s blazing gaze through it all but he doesn’t bother holding it, not even for a fraction of a second. Instead noticing Kelce and Topper staring at him like he’s out of his mind…

He shifts his gaze back up to the sky, only now realizing the buzz that the two of you had created amongst those around you. He hadn’t noticed in the slightest before that moment, his entire world captivated by the girl now sitting in his lap, giving little else the ability to share her within his brain.  

      On the drive home that night, alone in his truck, Rafe plays your words over and over again on a constant loop in his head.

“You feel so good, Rafe Cameron…”

Rafe Cameron.

Rafe Cameron. Rafe Cameron. Rafe Cameron.

Your voice saying his name over and over again. The same voice that he’d heard over and over and over again since your first encounter… the first time he’d heard you say it.

“Rafe Cameron.”

Those words had been seared into his brain… they had been on a constant loop in his head ever since. He’d heard it so much that he was willing to admit he started to feel like he was becoming borderline crazy.

He’d hear it throughout the day, at the most random times, living rent free in his brain, even while he was golfing, even in his dreams….

On one particular occasion…fuck…When your voice had become way too much to bear…  jacking off in the bathroom of the club picturing those same exact words coming out of your mouth in an entirely different context. The memory still far too embarrassingly painful to relive, too proud to replay it, even in his own head.

Rafe drives on auto pilot the rest for the way back to Tanneyhill. As he pulls up in the driveway, he gets a sense of deja vu as another memory floats back to him. A memory of getting picked up in this very same driveway only a few months ago…

April:

Noah had just pulled up in the Range Rover at Tanneyhill. Rafe, Topper and Kelce made their way to the car but as Rafe approached the passenger seat, his heart nearly stopped as he registered the voice that was coming from the car speaker.

Your voice.

Noah waved to the guys as he continued the conversation with his sister.

“I don’t even –”

“Noah, come the fuck on, I never ask you for any favors like this… please.”

Noah was ready to give up the moment you said please but surprisingly you kept going. He’s already pulling out of the driveway as the guys look between him and the voice coming out of the speaker, deducting that it had to be Noah’s infamous sister.

“It’ll take you literally ten minutes to drive to the office. Zach was supposed to send me the file before he left but he fucking –”

“Y/N, relax, I’m already on my way…” he laughs.

“Ugh” you groan, expelling a breath. “THANK YOU! You’re a lifesaver. Call me when you have it, I need to –”

“Waittttttt up!” Noah threatens. “What’re you doing, tonight?”

Your breezy laugh fills the car as you register people talking (Topper and Kelce in the backseat, giggling like crazy.)

“Don't worry about it! Call me when you’re there, thanks Noah.”

The call ends as Kelce whistles from the backseat and then makes a whip sound.

“Bro, your sister…”

“Wait…” Topper questions when he sees you all driving towards downtown, where your fathers offices are. “We are already running late to this —”

“Dude, it’s ten minutes, chill… Emma will be ready and waiting for your ass when you get there…” Rafe laughs, as Noah eyes him from the driver's seat.

Topper gags as Kelce pipes up again. “Still though, sisters got ya a bit whipped, huh?”

Noah flips him off, thinking about your imminent presence on this island and the knowing effect it will soon enough have…

“Oh, don’t worry…. she will have all of you wrapped around her finger in no time.”

Rafes' heart sped up for only a second as he gazed out the window towards the night sky. He wasn’t exactly sure how to convey to Noah at that moment that she already did…

She’s had Rafe wrapped around her little finger since the very first night….

.....

Taglist: @lurkymurker @mackenzielovee @mor-bs @totallynotkaibiased @aaleksmorozova @onlygetaway @itsalexwin @tsnelf7 @starkeybae

[sgtjbbhasmyheart]

Drunk Texting Is(n’t) Bad for Your Health- Chapter Two

Series Summary: Talk about your unconventional meet-cute! Bucky receives a text by mistake requesting he prove he's not Reader's sister. The easy dialogue between Reader and Bucky sparks a natural friendship, but could it lead to more? Bucky still deems himself unworthy of any form of affection or love. Reader is hellbent to prove him wrong. With the help of some (meddling) friends along the way, Bucky may get his happily-ever-after after all.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word count: 2921

Warnings: bad language words, blink and you’ll miss the angst, just some fluff

A/N: divider credit- @firefly-graphics

DO NOT copy or replicate without my permission

You awoke with a start, feeling as if you were late for work or something important and forgot to set your alarm. Your heart beat an erratic tattoo against your ribcage. Scrambling for your cell phone, you blindly reached across the side table near your bed in a panic. Unplugging the phone, you brought the device an ungodly closeness to your face. It was only 6:17. On Saturday.

Your pulse throbbed behind your eyeballs, and a strange stickiness coated the inside of your mouth. Did you drink that much last night?

How could you not? Timmons was a fair boss, and you enjoyed your job, but that dude loved the sound of his own voice.

The quarterly business dinners were mandatory for all employees, even for the P.A.s. Typically, they weren’t so bad, but last night, Timmons felt the need to toot his own horn for landing a massive contract with Stark Industries slash The Avengers. He went on and on about how great it was for the firm.

He was like a giant kid in a candy store with his ramblings. ‘We will be promoting the face of The Avengers and everything that goes with it,’ he spouted off like the firm was god’s gift to public relations.

You groaned at the reminder of last night’s presentation. The contract wasn’t even in effect yet, and you were sick of the Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. Timmons could be a real buzz kill.

Rolling to your back, you brought your phone up to tap the screen to read the emails you received overnight. On display was a text from 11:04 by someone named James. It read: “Goodnight, (Y/N).”

Your mind went back to last night again, trying to recall who this James was. He must be significant if you plugged his contact information into your phone already. Had you met someone last night?

Drawing a blank, you clicked on the text bubble to pull up the thread. Briefly scanning through the numerous texts, everything came rushing back. In an attempt to text your sister, Robyn, you mistakenly texted this mysterious, James.

You felt like an utter buffoon when you learned he wasn’t Robyn. You always did have a way with the cute boys. Probably why you were single. You groaned out loud as you read on.

You im safely inside my apartment. Pretty sure no one followed me home

James Did you triple check the lock on the front door?

You yes dad yeesh

James There are a lot of bad people out there. Just want to make sure you’re safe.

You sounds like you watch the news too much but its sweet of u to care

James I know from experience.

You r u the bad guy or have u been the one mugged?

James Let’s just say I have friends that have dealt with the bad things of the world.

You right i almost forgot ur a military-trained assassin athlete mchottie

James Did you ever send your sister a text?

You shit thanks for reminding me i have such a crazy story to tell her

James Only good things, I hope.

You oh yeah all the good things an enigmatic yet handsome stranger cares more about my safety than any of my ex-boyfriends ever did.

James My ma raised me right.

You id say

James_ I hate to cut this short, but I think you need your rest. Especially if you’re meeting your sister tomorrow._

You i dont want to agree but ur probably right

You whats ur name btw?

James My name? Why? Do you plan to continue texting me after tonight?

You duh ur fun to talk to

James Oh.

You or not its cool if u dont want to

James It’s James.

You nice to meet u james im (y/n)

James Nice to meet you as well.

You my sister just texted me back and were still meeting at 9 i should go 

You goodnite james

James Goodnight, (Y/N).

Oh. My. God. Had you seriously drunk-flirted with a stranger and offered to keep texting him? You had no shame with a few drinks in you.

You brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of your nose and sighed loudly.

What did you know of this James? He had a New York area phone number. Check. He could have been a real dick about your mistake but wasn’t. Understanding. Check. He worried about you getting home safely in your inebriated state. Caring. Check. Not too forthcoming with the nine to five. Secretive. Check. His mouth looked so soft and plush, and his eyes were made to drown in. Gorgeous. Check.

A heat simmered beneath your skin as you recounted the shortlist you’d made. Were you lusting over someone you’d exchanged less than forty texts with? Had you somehow woken back up in high school?

Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you stared at the screen displaying the message thread. Were you really considering this? You nodded your head to answer your own question. Where was the harm in a little shameless flirting? If worse came to worst, you could always block him.

With your mind made up, you began typing into your phone, constructing an apology.

You Good morning! First off, I want to apologize for the way I behaved over text last night.

You Though, I do like to imbibe in the occasional drink or two, I am, by no means, a lush.

You Please take everything I said with a grain of salt. Apparently, I get loose-lipped and cheeky with free wine. 😐

You Again, I’m sorry and understand if you wanted to cease our correspondence for my behavior.

You blew out a breath and tossed your phone aside. It was up to fate now and a stranger named James.

You laid in your bed for several minutes staring at the ceiling, contemplating between whether to send a ‘haha just kidding’ text and what the weather would be like, so you could forego shaving your legs in the shower today.

Your phone chimed during the pondering of hair removal, indicating a new text. You knew it was James proclaiming you a freak and to forget his number, but secretly, you hoped it was Robyn canceling today.

Seizing the phone from your mattress top, your heart’s beat increased with each second you went without looking at the screen. Finding the courage, you flipped the device over to read the message.

James Quite the formal apology, Ms. Professor.

You smiled at the text. It didn’t tell you to pound sand or eat shit. No, it was teasing and in jest. You sighed in relief.

You Cease our correspondence too much?

James No, no it was perfect if this was 1863, and you were breaking up with me via telegraph.

You Stop!

James Exactly! ‘Never speak to me again!’ Stop. ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’ Stop.

A belly laugh disrupted the tranquil air of your bedroom. You quickly thumbed out a reply once you caught your breath.

You You’re incorrigible.

James I’m glad to see you are using proper capitalization and punctuation this morning.

You Ha!

You When you are buzzed and/or tipsy, capitals and periods be damned. Like you’re so perfect when you’re drunk.

James We all have our flaws.

Was he implying he was a sloppy texter when drunk, too? You shrugged it off as him being cryptic again.

You What are you doing up so early on a Saturday? I didn’t wake you, did I?

You were suddenly stricken with guilt. You should have waited for a more reasonable hour to send out rapid-fire apology texts. Not at 6:36 in the morning. You didn’t want last night’s behavior hanging over you, though. Better to clear the air now than later. You could always ask for forgiveness again if you had disturbed his sleep.

James I had just gotten back from my run when I saw your texts. I have training this morning.

You Oh, right. For your hush-hush, super top secret mission/quidditch game.

You You ever gonna tell me what you really do?

James_ Maybe. Someday._

How far away was someday? Was he planning to text you until you both died or until he got bored? How did texting relationships even work?

You Or is it one of those situations where if you told me you’d have to kill me?

James 😈

You There you go again--being all mysterious.

James Keep ‘em guessing and coming back for more.

You Has that strategy worked well for you in the past?

James Got you to text me again this morning, didn’t it?

You scoffed at what he had suggested. He was correct, but your stubborn streak would deny everything.

You The only reason I texted you this morning was to apologize for acting like a drunken fool last night.

And to squash the curiosity burning in your veins. But he didn’t need to know that.

James Oh.

The reply caused you to furrow your brow and your stomach to drop. You regretted not adding more levity to your last text. Of course, it wasn’t the only reason you were drawn to him.

You I appreciate that the selfie you sent wasn’t a dick pic. And you genuinely seemed to care about me getting home safely. Thank you.

You And maybe- a teeny, tiny bit- is honestly interested in getting to know you better.

You waited on pins and needles for his text, watching the pulsing ellipsis on your screen. Was he just humoring you?

James Hook. Line. Sinker.

Reading his response generated a flush from your jaw to your hairline. You growled in embarrassment. You fell for the oldest trick in the book. He baited you for a compassionate answer, and you delivered beautifully. Hook, line, and sinker, indeed.

You You’re an ass. I take everything back.

James Don’t be mad. I wasn’t sure how it was going to go, but you played into my trap wonderfully.

James If it makes you feel any better, all kidding aside, I want to get to know you better too.

James I fell asleep with a smile on my face last night and woke up with one this morning.

James Because of you, (Y/N).

A flutter broke apart in your chest. You hadn’t time-traveled back to high school; no, this was junior high territory.

You You’re lucky you’re so damn charming, James.

James Doll, you have no idea.

The subway ride into Manhattan usually gave you the chance to get a little reading in since it took nearly fifty minutes from Queens. Not today, though. You spent the entirety of the train ride texting back and forth with James. It was mundane stuff, but you were getting a grasp of who James was as a person.

You Favorite color?

James Black. You?

You Blue.

You Favorite ice cream flavor?

James Chocolate. Yours?

You Ben & Jerry’s Cherry Garcia.

James I didn’t realize we were getting specific.

You We weren’t, but that’s my favorite.

You Favorite movie?

James I like the classics- The Wizard of Oz, It’s A Wonderful Life, Frankenstein.

You I have too many to list, so don’t ask.

You Okay. Lightning round because I’m almost to my stop.

James Where are you going again?

You paused your reply for a brief second, wondering if you should divulge your destination. You’d known James less than twenty-four hours; although, it felt like weeks after this morning. Where was the harm in telling him where you were meeting your sister? There were nearly nine million people in this city. There was no way you’d ever bump into each other.

You A bakery in the Upper East Side called Two Little Red Hens. Ever been?

James Don’t think I have.

You Well, since you like chocolate, they have a fantastic cake called Brooklyn Blackout. Super rich but delicious.

James Sounds right up my alley.

You Cats or dogs?

James I’m gone too much, so cats.

The answer piqued your interest. Maybe he was an athlete. Wouldn’t it be practice and not training, though? Or he’s FBI or CIA.

You Socks on or off for sleeping?

James Off.

You Silver or gold?

James Silver.

You Morning, noon, or night?

James Night.

You How do you take your coffee?

James Room for sugar and creamer.

You Boxers or briefs?

James Boxer briefs.

You laughed out loud, looking around the subway car to see if anyone was paying attention to you. Per usual, they weren’t.

You Touché.

As soon as the train stopped, you gathered your purse close to your body and made for the exit. You followed the crowd of fellow passengers through the turnstile and ascended the stairs onto street level.

The morning sunlight caressed your skin like a warm blanket. The humidity wasn’t too bad, yet, but the threat of afternoon thunderstorms still hung in the air.

Even with the reasonably early hour, the sidewalk was stuffed with people, carrying to-go coffee cups or shopping bags. You fought for your little spot of real estate on the grimy concrete.

Stopping at a red traffic light, waiting to cross, you typed out another question for James.

You Pineapple on pizza--yay or nay?

The light changed as you finished, and the throng of pedestrians around you guided you across the street. You spotted Robyn outside the bakery as your phone dinged with a new text alert.

“Wow, I’m surprised you made it on time,” Robyn said as you hugged hello.

You looked at the clock on your phone. 8:58. “You and me both, sister.” Glancing back at your phone’s screen, you giggled.

James What kind of monster puts pineapple on their pizza??

“What’s so funny?” Robyn asked as you accompanied her through the bakery’s door.

With a grin on your face, you punched out a quick reply:

You Well, it was nice knowing you, James. It was a swell friendship while it lasted--a whole 11 ½ hours.

Robyn elbowed you softly in the ribs with a look on her face, seeking an explanation.

“Ow,” you grunted. “What?”

“You tell me. I half expected a zombie to walk through the doors today after your text last night. Not Suzie Sunshine.”

You both edged closer to the counter as the line in front of you dwindled.

James Say it ain’t so, doll! Pineapple on pizza? Really??

You let out a low chortle as you skimmed the text. You glimpsed up at Robyn as you shuffled forward in line again. “Believe me, I’m pretty hungover,” you replied, shoving your phone in your back pocket. “It’s a funny story. I’ll tell you everything when we sit.”

Robyn stared at you warily, still trying to figure out what had come over you. “Okay,” she conceded, stepping to the register to order.

With each of you supplied with an iced coffee and a peach ginger scone, you found an empty table by a window along 2nd Avenue and proceeded to tell Robyn about James.

When you stopped to catch your breath, remembering the whirlwind the last twelve hours had been, you peered at your sister for her reaction.

She stared at you like you’d grown a second head. She shook her head in disbelief. “(Y/N), what where you thinking?”

Your brow pinched in confusion. Was she actually scolding you? You crossed your arms over your chest. “I was thinking about how my big sister is always telling me to meet new people and how it’s time I thought about settling down.”

“Not like this it’s not,” she hissed. “This is how your body parts end up in someone’s freezer!”

You choked on the piece of scone you shoved in your mouth before she started ridiculing you. After coughing to clear your airway and taking a sip of your iced coffee, you leered at Robyn. “Oh, my god! Dramatic much? Have you been binge-watching Dateline again? Jesus Christ, Robyn, he’s harmless,” you countered.

“You think you’ll be so careful, but you’ll let one little detail slip, and he’ll find you,” Robyn said before taking a pull from her coffee.

“You mean, like, how I was meeting you at Two Little Red Hens at nine o’clock?”

Robyn’s mouth popped open in an O. “What the hell, (Y/N)?” she stage-whispered. “Are you trying to get yourself kidnapped and sold into sex trafficking?”

“Please,” you drew out in one long syllable. “He doesn’t know what I look like. How would he snatch me?”

“He could look you up on Facebook.”

“Without a last name?” You shook your head, no.

“What about a reverse search on your number?” Robyn asked, pushing the plate holding her scone away. “That’s a thing.”

“Perhaps, but it seems like a lot of effort for a mistake I made. It wasn’t like he was seeking me or anyone else out.”

Robyn huffed out a breath and folded her arms in exasperation. Always the protective big sister. You could tell you were breaking her down, though.

“C’ mon, Robbie. It’s all in innocent fun. I’m not saying I’m hoping he’ll turn out to be Mr. Right, but the banter is fun,” you remarked. “James is charming and witty and nice to talk to.”

Robyn shook her head once more, frowning. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”

You reached across the table for her hand and squeezed gently. “Me too.” You smiled slyly, remembering last night’s dinner and Timmons gushing about The Avengers. “If not, I know how to get ahold of a couple of centenarians who know chivalry isn’t dead.”

Chapter One | Chapter Three

Tag List:

@hommoturttle @courtneychicken @vidzbyemz @vicmc624 @shawnie--jo @redbarn1995 @learisa @austynparksandpizza @ddowii

Send an ask to be added to the list!

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Alternate Future chapter 26: Everything’s Fine (originally posted on September 20, 2021)

AN: Welcome back to the jungle readers. When last we left Steven, his mind was going further down the toilet after shattering Jasper and the voice in his head continues trying to take control, which led to him lashing out against White Diamond & Spinel. Can he possibly keep his personal Nega-Scott under control while trying to tell the Gems that everything is totally okay? All this and more in this gripping chapter of Alternate Future!

Synopsis: Despite Steven constantly saying otherwise, everything isn't fine.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven, Topiary Stevens, Cactus Stevens

Estelle as Garnet

Micheala Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl, Yellow Pearl, Blue Pearl

Grace Rolek as Connie

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Ron Perlman as Steven's Inner Voice

Shelby Rabara as Peridot, Squaridot

Jennifer Paz as Lapis, Laz, Zuli

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Kimberly Brooks as Cherry Quartz

Michelle Maryk as Larimar

Ian Jones-Quartey as Snowflake Obsidian, Bixbite

Tara Platt as Heaven and Earth Cubic Zirconias

Martha Higerada as Topaz

Auli'I Cravalho as Orange Spodumene

Aparna Nancherla as Nephrite

Kimiko Glenn as Blue Chalcedony

Phillipa Soo as Chrysocolla

Anika Noni Rose as Watermelon Tourmaline

Tara Strong as Grossular Diopside

Aimee Carrero as Moonstone

Jinkx Monsoon as Emerald

Kari Wahlgren as Pyrope

Melissa Fahn as Demantoid

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball

Larissa Gallagher as Bluebird Azurite

Susan Egan as Rose Quartz

--

As soon as Steven returned to his earthly home via Warp Pad and checked up on the bathroom, he returned to his room to flop down on his bed. Steven thought the Diamonds would be of help to him, but instead, they didn't understand what he was going through, and his evil voice kept making things worse for him.

"Why did you make me do that?" Steven lugubriously asked his inner self. "Why did you make me nearly kill White Diamond, and punch Spinel?"

"They hurt you, so I thought it was about time you gave them their just desserts." The evil voice within Steven answered. "Yet the real you insisted that everything was fine. That's your biggest problem, you're way too forgiving of others no matter how much they want you dead."

"No, I know when others don't deserve to be accepted." Steven argued. "Like Black Rutile for example. If she's going to be proud of how irredeemable she is, I'll just let her do her thing."

"Ah yes, do her thing." The negative side of Steven mused. "Like threaten your life and make repeated attempts on your psyche. Yeah, if you could change that pervert, then maybe you can change the sociopath too."

Suddenly, Steven's phone began to ring. "One second Negative Me, I have to take this." Steven said while picking it up and hearing a relieving familiar voice on the other end. "Hey Connie, what's up?"

"Steven!" Connie cried in delight. "Good, you finally picked up. I can't believe we haven't talked to each other since the hospital visit, how are you?"

"I'm great!" Steven fibbed while gazing at how he was still pink. "Never been better!"

"Really?" Connie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Are you sure you haven't had any more swelling or turning pink problems?"

"Uh, nope?" Steven replied. "Okay, maybe, but how are you doing? How's prepping for college going?"

"It's going fine Steven." Connie answered nervously. "But what you mean when you said maybe?"

"Look, there's nothing to worry about." Steven kept on lying. "Everything's fine."

"I doubt it." Steven's dark side interrupted.

"Look, I'll call you later," Steven said. "I don't wanna wake up the Gems."

"But they don't even sleep!" Connie exclaimed before Steven quickly hung up and gazed at his hands before the TV turned on.

"-it's because I'M A UNIVERSE!" Steven began seeing visions of the past on the TV, starting with his argument with Greg before it went to static. Then it began showing Steven holding the shattered remains of Jasper's gem in his hand. More static, followed by the near-death of White Diamond, then Steven punching Spinel for singing to him. Just as Steven got up to try and turn the TV off, he got one last devastating surprise.

"Steven, we can't both exist." Rose Quartz announced to Steven in the video she made before giving birth to him, the very sight of her warm face making him twitch angrily where he stood. "I'm going to become half of you. And I need you to know that every moment you love being yourself, that's me, loving you and loving being you."

"No, I never loved myself," Steven growled furiously. "I've always hated being you. Everything I've suffered, and everything you ever put everyone through," He balled up his fist and pointed it straight at the TV screen. "IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

Before Rose could finish, Steven broke the screen with a single punch and prematurely ended the video. However, Steven then let out a gasp as he gazed into his reflection on the shattered remains of the screen, noticing that his irises were now diamond-shaped and realizing what he had become.

"No! No, no, no, no!" Steven trembled and dropped to the ground in horror. "Th-this can't be happening, I didn't think about shattering White, I didn't shatter Jasper, punch Spinel, or nearly kill Dad!" His panicking soon turned to mad chuckling as Steven tried to cheer himself up. "I'm Steven Universe!" Steven then turned to Vidalia's painting of him and Garnet. "I'm fine, I'm fine!" he loudly repeated to himself, causing the glass of his bedroom door to break. "I'm totally fine!"

"Steven, is that you?!" The loudness of Steven's fibbing caused Pearl to cry out as she, Amethyst, and Garnet raced upstairs to Steven's room and gasped at his current appearance.

"What happened?" Amethyst asked Steven. "When did you get so big?"

"Is everything alright?" Pearl added just as nervously.

"I'm fine." Steven smiled and waved at the Gems. "Going to the Diamonds was just a waste of time since they had no idea what I was going through. I thought I needed to figure myself out, but I already know who I am! I'm Steven Universe; and I help, not hurt!"

"Yeah, then I suppose you tried to help the TV there?" Amethyst said while pointing a thumb at the damaged TV. "Seriously, we have got to upgrade someday. But seriously dude, what's going on? You look way different!"

"Pfft, I'm still your lovable old Steven!" Steven denied in response.

"Steven, we're worried," Garnet stated, taking off her glasses to emphasize how concerned she was for her ward. "You haven't been acting like your usual self lately, and we think you should get some rest before this gets dangerous."

"I'm okay, really!" Steven continued lying to the Gems, who glanced concernedly at each other before turning back to him.

"We'll take your word for it." Garnet said resignedly.

"You know, everything's gone downhill ever since I quit Little Homeschool!" Steven declared cheerfully. "I should head on over and see if I can make myself useful there! See you guys later!"

With that, Steven used his newfound super speed to race out of the house to Little Homeworld. To the Gems, it was like he was gone in an instant.

"I get that Steven wants us to know he's fine, but that was a little unsettling." Pearl stated fearfully. "We should just follow him to Little Homeworld so we can keep an eye on him."

"Agreed." Garnet nodded while putting her glasses back on.

"Yeah, that boy ain't right!" Amethyst declared before the trio left Steven's bedroom. But what they or even Steven didn't know was that a black-colored drone was watching them carefully.

--

"Excellent, he's just about at his breaking point." Black Rutile declared triumphantly while examining the footage her drone has gathered with White Topaz by her side. "Oh, I haven't felt this much of a rush since the Strawberry Battlefields!"

"But will Steven get any better?" White Topaz asked nervously, inciting her master to give her a furious glare.

"No, that's my intention!" Black Rutile stated. "I broke him, I broke his spirit! If I physically harmed him, the damage would just go away. But mental torture, the wounds shall only grow and fester! I have officially broken Steven Universe, and all that's left is for everyone to reject that monster."

"Oh master, we're back from training." Bluebird Azurite declared as she flew back to the Rutile's cavern hideaway.

"Oh hey guys, how you getting along?" White Topaz asked the fusion cheerfully.

"We're getting along splendidly thanks to Steven's advice." Bluebird answered before un-fusing into Aquamarine and Eyeball.

"Now we're even stronger than ever!" Aquamarine exclaimed joyfully.

"Look what we can do now!" Eyeball added before pulling out her chisel and shaking it to turn the blade into a beam of fire while Aquamarine launched bubbles from her wings.

"Ah, so glad you two are reaching your full potential, potential that Steven has suppressed for too long." Black Rutile smiled warmly at the tiny twosome. "But know this, you may be afraid of what could be to come, but remember that fear is but the precursor to valor! And to strive and triumph in the face of fear is what it means to be a warrior. Don't think, become."

"I fail to see how that could inspire us, but okay." Aquamarine muttered before peeking behind Black Rutile to see the drone footage. "Now what's all this?"

"It's video evidence that I've driven Steven to madness." Black Rutile answered with a proud grin before gesturing to each screen. "Here, we see Steven going ballistic on a human television when his mother appeared on the monitor." She said pointing to the first one. "On this one, the accursed Crystal Gems show concern for him for once, but he denies that anything is wrong with him." Then Black Rutile moved on to the third one. "And finally, Steven is just gone like a light."

"How can he do that?" White Topaz asked as she looked at the third viewscreen.

"Research shows that this comes from his Diamond heritage interfering with his human biology." Black Rutile analyzed the footage. "I should know, I was often tasked with watching over Pink Diamond whenever her usual caretakers were unavailable. And let me just say, it was unbelievably hectic."

"Yeah, like remember our attempted occupation of Zembilla?" White Topaz added. "Pink really grew attached to those little orange natives and didn't want them all dead."

"Don't remind me to the point of making me have a flashback." Black Rutile groaned while stroking her temples. "This shall be our time to rise up. We shall strike the first moment we get when Steven is at his lowest, so I suggest you better prepare." The Rutile then turned to her Topaz muscle. "Topaz, I need you to preside over Aquamarine and Ruby's training for the time being."

"Oh, of course, I'll do as you say!" White Topaz frantically declared. "That's me, White Topaz, always at your service!"

"Just…..go." Black Rutile's eye began to twitch at White Topaz's brownnosing. As soon as her three subordinates left, the mastermind turned back to her screens and paused the first one at Steven punching the TV screen. "Soon, my boy. Your god complex will finally crumble, just like your so-called happily ever after."

--

"Ah Little Homeworld, long time no see!" Steven declared happily as he reached Little Homeworld and landed on the Warp Pad. "Time to find someone who needs my help."

As Steven ran around the village in search of people to help, Gems and humans were taken a little aback by his new appearance and tried to stay away from him, though Steven didn't know why.

"Look, we're just saying Emerald, there are more ways reptiles are connected to birds than you think." Demantoid argued with Emerald as the two played chess together.

"Name one!" Emerald declared while moving her rook to knock out Demantoid's pawn. "Are there any lizards that have feathers, hm?!"

"Hey, guys, any arguments that need settling?" Steven butted into the green Gems' debate with a wide smile, taking the two by surprise. "Something about birds?"

"What is wrong with you?!" Emerald exclaimed. "This is why Black Rutile hates you, you think everything has to revolve around you and how you think you can fix everything! But even so, you look creepily happier than usual. Something is definitely up."

"Oh, everything's fine." Steven declared, his eye twitching ever so slightly at Emerald's accusation. "I think I'll just let you guys get back to your conversation." And so, Steven set off for someone else to try and help, leaving the green ex-subordinates of Black Rutile aghast before they decided to change the topic while getting back to their game.

"So, I've heard rumors that Steven is suffering from some problems lately." Demantoid said as her rook moved to take out the opposing knight. "Something about post-traumatic stress disorder?"

"Are you sure?" Emerald replied. "Because I've read about the symptoms, and something tells me he might have a borderline personality disorder."

"Maybe somewhere in the middle?" Demantoid deduced.

--

"Now the key to giving a plant proper sunlight is finding a spot that's just right." Peridot exposited to her class of Pyrope, Orange Spodumene, Blue Chalcedony, Cherry Quartz, and Squaridot while pointing to a chrysanthemum. "And it also varies on what kind of plant you're growing."

"I see." Squaridot muttered in awe.

Just then, Steven barged into the greenhouse and grinned at Peridot's class. "Hi Peridot, do any of you need some help?"

"No, I do believe we're perfectly fine." Pyrope answered dryly.

"So what brings you back here?" Peridot asked. "Didn't you leave a few months back?"

"Just your friendly neighborhood Crystal Gem just here to help!" Steven declared. "And I think your students have a few struggling saplings here. Let me give you a hand." Chuckling at his pun, Steven licked his hands and reached out to Pyrope's pot before Peridot stopped him.

"Not so fast!" Peridot scolded Steven. "Amethyst told me you're on a No Plant Friends policy after what happened with the Cactus Stevens."

"We're right here you know." A Cactus Steven said while helping a nearby Sapphire.

"Besides, I don't want your germs all over my prized flower!" Pyrope added, protectively hiding her pot from Steven.

"Oh come on you guys, I just want to give them a little nudge!" Steven laughed. To further prove his point, a leaf fell off Blue Chalcedony's plant.

"That has been bothering me lately." Blue Chalcedony stated, holding her pot out to Steven. "Go ahead, just a smidge though."

"I got a bad feeling about this." Cherry Quartz said warily.

"Oh don't worry, I got this!" Steven said as he licked his finger and tapped on the spot where the leaf fell off.

Moments later, the greenhouse began literally bursting with plant life, and not in a good way. Living topiaries in the shape of Steven broke through the greenhouse walls chanting "Steven's here to help!" while Peridot's class ran away screaming.

"Nice going Chal, now look what's happened!" Pyrope yelled at Blue Chalcedony.

"Hey, lay off her Pyrope!" Orange Spodumene exclaimed. "But still, something is not right with Steven!"

On the topic of Steven, he followed the class out of the greenhouse and seemed oblivious to the damage he had caused. "Look at that, life! It's everywhere, it always finds a way!"

"Much like how you find a way to drive people away." Steven's evil voice muttered sardonically, but Steven paid it no mind as he continued his search for people to help.

--

"Now, tell me how that makes you feel." Garnet said to a human couple she was giving counseling to when she heard Peridot scream, causing the humans to stand up as they gasped. "See you next week."

As soon as the couple ran away in fright, three Topiary Stevens surrounded Garnet, still chanting "Steven's here to help!" while the real Steven ran into the fusion.

"Oh Garnet, I see you're making some new friends!" Steven exclaimed joyfully, continuing to be unaware of his surroundings. "Then I guess this was a net win. Welp, gotta run and find someone else to help! It's what I do!"

"Then help me stop them!" Garnet yelled while the Topiary Stevens repeated "Steven's here to help!", which began to get on her nerves. "The others have to know about this."

--

"Being a lifeguard was far easier than I thought." Laz declared while relaxing in a lifeguard chair above the Gems in the now completed swimming pool. "Just gotta sit around and wait for something to happen. Besides, Gems can't drown anyways!"

"Yeah, but they still need to learn some basic rules." Lapis said to her old friend turned enemy turned friend again before blowing her whistle. "Hey, no running so fast! You might slip and fall!"

"Sorry, Lapis." Teal Zircon apologized before diving in and landing on top of Watermelon Tourmaline. "This is living, eh Melon?"

"You said it, Teal." Watermelon Tourmaline said as she floated around the pool with the Zircon relaxing on her stomach. "Ain't nothing could go wrong today."

Just then, Steven came a-knocking as he opened the gate to the pool to check out what was going on. "Hey Lapises, how's everything going?" he asked. "Anyone need any saving right now?"

"Actually, I think we're running a pretty tight ship as is," Lapis answered Steven while Zuli emerged from the pool after a swim. "Right guys?"

"Yeah, we don't need any extra help right now." Zuli stated. "But if you want, we could hold tryouts sometime."

"Oh no need, I'll just do it myself." Steven beamed before he began looking out for someone who might need his assistance when he spotted Teal Zircon resting on Watermelon Tourmaline's stomach. "Hey TZ, you could slip and fall!"

"What?" Teal asked before Steven grabbed her by the hand. "I'm doing pretty fine over here." Suddenly, as Steven tried to pull the Zircon from the pool, he accidentally pulled a little too hard and threw her up in the air. "OKAY, NOW I'M NOT DOING FINE!" TZ screamed as she flew away from the pool. "WITNESS ME!"

Teal Zircon didn't stay in the air for long, and soon dropped from the sky into another part of Little Homeworld. "I'm okay!"

"What's the big idea, Steven?" Watermelon Tourmaline asked. "We were all having fun before you came in and threw Teal Zircon to who knows where!"

"I'm sure TZ's fine, she said so herself." Steven laughed. "Well, gotta run! Have a nice day everybody!"

As soon as Steven ran off, more Topiary Stevens came bursting through the chain-link fence as they wrestled with the Cactus Stevens, prompting the other Gems present to slowly back away.

"Can this day get any weirder?" Laz scoffed. "I was trying to relax here!"

"Hey, did anyone else notice that Steven was all pink and such?" Lapis asked her fellow water-manipulating lifeguards.

"Yeah, it's kinda freaking me out." Zuli replied. "And are we sure he's totally fine?"

"I'm asking that question too." Lapis pondered while Peridot came charging through the broken fence to break up the battle of the plant Stevens.

--

When Steven left the pool, the first thing he saw was Bismuth's forge. "That's right, it must be shop o'clock!" he declared while skidding to a stop. "Bismuth's shop class, that is. Time to get my shop on."

"You good bud, you talking to yourself or something?" Amethyst, dressed in a coach uniform, asked Steven as he entered the forge.

"Now, the detailing requires a light touch." Bismuth explained to Blue Pearl, Bixbite & Snowflake Obsidian while standing between Pearl wearing a smithing apron and Yellow Pearl in a suit of armor. "Pay attention now everybody, cause this is critical to getting it right."

"Uh, hey howdy hey!" Steven greeted the shop class while leaning against the entrance.

"Oh, hey Steven!" Bixbite cheerfully greeted Steven.

"Did you get taller?" Blue Pearl asked with a tilt of her head and a finger to her lips.

"Whoa-ho-ho, lookin' good Steven!" Bismuth complimented Steven's change in appearance.

"I don't think that look is a positive change for him." Pearl whispered to Bismuth. "We think something might be wrong with him."

"Fancy seeing you drop by." Yellow Pearl grinned, unaware of what the teachers were conversing about. "How do you like my armor?"

"You look great Yellow Pearl!" Steven answered. "So Bismuth, in need of a teaching assistant?"

"Actually, Pearl's my TA today," Bismuth replied with a hand on Pearl's shoulder before presenting Yellow Pearl's armor-clad arm. "but I could use a wedding expert for my wedding armor demonstration. How 'bout it?"

"Of course, I'll help!" Steven declared. "That's what I love doing, just helping everyone!"

"Okay, let's get some materials warmed up for you." Bismuth then walked over to a pot of coals that she plucked a cooling steel bar from and flattened one end of it on the anvil with her hammer hand. "I think that's good enough." She stated. "Hey Steven, mind helping me with a pauldron or two?"

"I got this." Steven cheered as he walked over to the anvil and prepared to punch the metal.

"Hold up there boulder-brain." Bismuth stopped Steven before he could punch. "It's just some detail work, no need for a big mallet when you could use a little hammer." She handed a tiny hammer to Steven. "Plus, you could burn yourself that way."

"Oh, whoopsy-daisy, thanks Bismuth." Steven exclaimed and lightly tapped on the metal with the hammer. Instead of the detail work he thought he could do, Steven instead cracked the anvil into pieces with a single tap.

"Someone's stronger than we thought." Snowflake laughed nervously while Pearl & Bismuth gazed at the broken anvil.

"Look at that, now you have two anvils!" Steven laughed while Bismuth mourned the destruction of her anvil.

"NOOOOO!" Bismuth dropped to her knees in despair. "My anvil! My beautiful anvil!"

"Oh, grow up will you?" Steven's inner voice grumbled. "It's an anvil, you can make another."

"Seems like my work here is done." The real Steven laughed as he prepared to leave. "Well, toodles!"

"You see what I mean, Steven's not himself lately." Pearl said as she comforted Bismuth. "First he nearly got Greg killed, then Jasper started calling him her Diamond, and now this."

"Can I be the first to say that he needs help?" Yellow Pearl asked sardonically as more Topiary Stevens continued their rampage outside the forge.

--

As Steven exited the forge, he ran towards a baseball game that Amethyst was holding. Nephrite was on the Warp Pad throwing a ball to Doc, Amethyst stood by with Onion next to her, Topaz stood with a pair of humans on the bases, Larimar was in the outfield, and Chrysocolla, Grossular Diopside & Moonstone were waiting to play.

As soon as Amethyst noticed Steven, she blew her whistle and turned to talk to him. "Hey dude," she greeted him. "What's up?"

"I was just wondering if you needed any more players." Steven offered. "I'm ready to have a ball!"

"I think we could squeeze you in, we do need a new outfielder," Amethyst concluded and pointed to Larimar. "Oy, Larimar! Hit the showers, Steven's taking your place!"

"Good luck there Steven." Larimar said while she got up and left while Steven took her place on the playing field.

"Yeah, good hustle there Lil Larimar." Steven complimented the ice Gem. "I'm honored to be joining such a great game, I mean, everyone here has been outstanding!"

"You just got here, how do you know that?" Nephrite raised her brow.

"That's just me, I know what everyone is doing and feel the need to help all the time!" Steven declared, creeping everyone out.

"Enough chit-chat, batter up!" Amethyst cried out, cuing Onion to pick up a bat and walk up to home base, ready to play. Nephrite threw the ball towards the silent boy and he hit it with the bat, although unfortunately, it was heading straight for a nearby house.

"Oh no, in danger again?!" the Heaven Cubic Zirconia complained as the ball sailed towards the window of her and Earth Cubic Zirconia's house while they were having tea.

"I swear, is it because we're small?" Earth Cubic Zirconia wondered. Thankfully, Steven caught the ball just in time, much to their relief.

"I did it." Steven declared and the other players cheered.

"Three cheers for Steven!" Topaz declared.

"That's our boy." Chrysocolla smiled.

"I did it, and I didn't ruin anything!" Steven boomed happily. "YEAH!" However, the complete opposite of what he just said quickly happened. His excited yell caused a windstorm powerful enough to knock people off their feet, break glass everywhere, and cause the Zirconias' house to fall apart.

"Whoa, take it easy Steven!" Moonstone cried as she held onto a bench while the windstorm continued.

"Someone help me!" Grossular Diopside yelled while she got blown away with Larimar. Thankfully, the windstorm died down after a few seconds but still left a ton of destruction in its wake, and all eyes were on Steven.

"Oops, sorry everyone." Steven blushed at the chaos he caused. "T-t-that was an accident. But what are accidents and mistakes but opportunities to learn and improve, right?" He looked down at the Zirconias, who weren't very happy about the destruction of their home.

"It was a mistake for us to be put in danger again, especially because of you!" Earth yelled accusingly.

"Earthy, shush!" Heaven shushed her partner.

"I mean, we all make mistakes, and as long as we keep improving, everything will be fine!" Steven declared while picking up a log. "Alright, let's get to it!"

"It was a mistake for you to come here in this state." The voice in Steven's head declared. "Black Rutile and I were right, you will drive everyone away."

"Listen, I am done with you for today." Steven's own thoughts argued with the voice. "Just pipe down and don't ever think about feeding me bad thoughts ever again, got it?"

"How about never?" the voice said smarmily while the Topiary Stevens got to work on helping Steven by picking up Onion, Larimar, and Grossular Diopside.

"WE'RE HELPING!" one of the Plant Stevens yelled.

--

High above the destroyed makeshift baseball field, Black Rutile's satellite continued watching everything and sending footage back to its creator, who was all too happy to see what her hard work has amounted to.

"This is just priceless!" Black Rutile laughed joyously. "First, he makes plants come to life and fight those cactus beasts, then he throws that annoying Zircon into the air, broke an anvil, and caused a scene during one of those human games. I'm sure he's going to make such a scene about all these little accidents."

"All the more tools to humiliate the boy." Aquamarine added just as sneakily. "Soon, he will have nothing but himself and his thoughts controlling him."

"Unless his friends were to come out and tell him everything will be alright." White Topaz objected. "I'm just saying, those Gems will stick by his side through thick and thin."

"Hey, no more objections!" Eyeball yelled while pulling out her flame knife. "Want me to test this on you?!"

While Eyeball began chasing White Topaz around the woods with her knife, Black Rutile just groaned and turned back to her screens. "Tell me Aquamarine, why do all great geniuses surround themselves with idiots?"

"Your guess is as good as mine my Rutile." Aquamarine shook her head while watching the screens focused on the beach house with bated breath.

--

As soon as Steven was done helping fix what he had broke, he returned to the beach house with a dourer expression than the big smile he kept wearing throughout the day. On the other side of the room, Connie was in the living room while Greg and the Gems sat down on the couch.

"Steven!" Connie cried. "I was right all along, you're still swelling! I tried calling you all day, but I kept getting this weird meme." She held up her phone, which now depicted Steven bouncing up and down while chanting "Steven's here to help!" just like the Topiary Stevens. "Please, what is going on? We're all worried for you."

"Go on boy, play dumb." Steven's inner voice commanded.

"I sometimes broadcast my subconscious these days." Steven answered. "It's really no big deal."

"NOT THAT DUMB!" the voice groaned in irritation.

"I can tell something is bothering you." Connie continued. "There are even times where the meme sometimes turns into this."

"Steven's here to help, Steven's here to help!" Steven kept chanting on Connie's phone before it began to glitch. "Steven help, help Steven!"

"Ah, I don't know what you're talking about!" Steven declared, his stress continuing to unnerve others. "Besides, you all saw I was doing just fine this morning. I'm fine, awesome even!"

"Steven, if being as helpful as you always are, even if it's a bit obnoxious & creepy, is what you want, we'll support you 100%." Greg comforted. "But if you're not really happy, if something's wrong-"

"He's onto us!" the voice exclaimed. "Should've gone a little further with the crash, I say."

"Nothing's wrong!" Steven rebuked his father's worries. "Besides, you all don't have to worry."

"We ARE worried!" Connie replied worryingly. "Besides, Pink Diamond's Pearl told the Gems over the communicator in your greenhouse that you punched Spinel while you were at Homeworld."

"Listen, you can tell us anything." Greg added.

"Look at these worms, ganging up on us." The inner voice kept snarling. "Run, run while you still can! No one may help us now! Except, of course, for a certain Rutile."

"It's not that easy." Steven muttered as he hung his head in shame. "You know what? I don't want to deal with all this." However, when Steven tried to leave, Garnet blocked his way to the Warp Pad while the rest kept him from leaving through the door. "Seriously guys, I don't want to deal with this!"

"No, we don't wanna deal with all this." Amethyst put her foot down at Steven's behavior.

"Please, you have to stop running." Garnet begged in addition when suddenly, Steven's body began to swell yet again and his face stretched out.

"Maybe we should get you back to my mom at the hospital." Connie suggested.

"HOSPITAL?!" Amethyst shrieked.

"Is that what you were doing while we were at the trial?!" Pearl yelled.

"You mean you didn't tell them?!" Connie cried out in shock, while Steven's body kept on distorting and his breath quickened.

"It wasn't that important, just my first ever doctor's visit." Steven smiled awkwardly. "You're making a big deal out of nothing! Sure, I messed up the house and broke a few things, but what teenager hasn't?"

"You spent years forcing secrets out of the Gems, and now you're the one keeping secrets?" Steven's darker half growled at his other half's hypocrisy. "You truly have become your mother."

"And sure, Dad and I had a little fight, but it was practically a rite of passage!" Steven continued fibbing and shrugged.

Connie and the Gems turned their gaze to Greg, who just scratched his head and let out a nervous laugh.

"I mean, wouldn't it be weird if we didn't?!" Steven kept on ranting. "And sure, I've had Black Rutile feed me some not so nice thoughts while you were at Los Diego that took the form of an inner voice that forced me to punch Spinel, or try and shatter White Diamond, but it's not like I actually went through with it! I did really shatter Jasper after all!"

"WHAT?!" Amethyst screamed at the thought of Steven, this sweet young man who would rather hang out with a fly than hurt it, doing such a thing, especially to a Gem he had tried many times to help see the light.

Although barely anyone could hear, Jasper let out a light moan from the bathroom.

"You're-you're joking right?!" Connie gasped with Greg while Garnet's jaw dropped and Pearl's eyes widened.

"Oh don't worry, I fixed Jasper! I can fix anything!" Steven's temper began to reach its boiling point. "I can just keep fixing and fixing things forever, and you'll never have to worry about anything ever again!"

"Except worrying about how you're deliberately pushing people away while begging them to stay." Steven's inner voice concluded while metaphorically looking around at the shocked reactions of Steven's human & Gem loved ones. "Just look at them all, how do you think they'd ever forgive you for such a horrendous act?"

"Steven." Garnet tried to lend an assuring hand on the boy's shoulder, but she was quickly shoved away.

"How messed up is that?!" Steven gasped as he felt something change in his body. His teeth began getting sharper, his skin became pinker & leatherier, his hands slowly turned into claws, and his pupils started turning pink. "That I've gotten away with all this for so long, forcing my views down the throats of others, tearing apart Gem society to the point where they'll eventually be invaded, actually murdering someone! Black Rutile was right, I am just an awful person! A sociopath even!"

No one could comprehend what Steven was thinking right now. Greg began to tear up at all these horrible things Steven was saying about himself, Connie gripped the father's arm tightly, and Pearl & Amethyst began fearfully hugging Garnet, whose face was completely frozen in horror.

"You think I'm so great, I'm so mature, that I always know what to do, BUT I'M NOT!" Steven began roaring in a more beastly tone. "I haven't learned a thing from my problems, and I never will! They all kept making me worse, YOU all keep making me worse! Are you even sure any of you ever loved or cared about me?! If it weren't for Pink Diamond ruining everything for everyone, I could've been just a normal kid!"

"That's right, just let everything out." The inner voice purred comfortingly. "Me on the other hand, I think I shall take my leave and prepare something more normal for you." With that, the inner voice seemingly vanished from Steven's mind.

"You all think of me as a perfect angel who's too pure for this world, but I'm not a little kid anymore!" Steven boomed before he dropped to the ground with his head between his hands. "I'm just like my mom. A fraud." He began to tremble where he crouched as something began bubbling on his back. "I'm a monster!"

Suddenly, a massive pillar of light pink scales erupted from Steven's back like a volcano as everyone reacted quickly. Garnet stuck her arms out to protect Amethyst & Pearl and Connie jumped back, but Greg was just plain terrified.

--

"I'm a monster!" Steven's final words before his transformation were rewound by Black Rutile as she eagerly replayed the phrase again and again on more of her satellite footage. "I'm a monster! I'm a monster! I'm a monster!"

With an evil grin, Black Rutile paused the video and shut off her screens. "And I have finally won!" she declared triumphantly and let out a booming evil laugh that echoed throughout the cave and scared off the nearby animals. Aquamarine & Eyeball grinned in delight, while White Topaz turned away from her cohorts in shame of what she had participated in. As quickly as Black Rutile finished her victorious cackle, she had another wonderful, awful idea in mind. "Now, onto Phase 2."

--

….holy shit. Uh, see you all for I am My Monster, I guess. And by the way, I did repurpose Steven accidentally playing Rose's message for the Rose trio in Rose Buds for the opening.

[batarella]

I Don’t Hate You - Part 3 (Jason Todd x Reader)

OKAY LEMME TELL YOU ALL I’VE NEVER POSTED ANYTHING THIS LONG. AND I’VE NEVER SMILED SO MUCH WHILE WRITING A SINGLE FIC IN MY LIFE. IT’S 2K WORDS LONGER THAN THE COMMANDER FINALE. TALK ABOUT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.

REMEMBER WHY JADE WEST WAS SO ICONIC IN VICTORIOUS? READ ON!

WORDS: A WHOPPING 7404 WORDS FOR A SINGLE PART OF A SERIES WARNINGS: NEVER HAD THIS MUCH FLUFF IN MY LIFE

Masterlist

I DON’T HATE YOU - MASTERLIST

-----

Hands flat on Ms. Peterson’s desk, you flashed the brightest fake smile you could. She looked up from her computer, probably the fifth round of solitaire for the day, and cocked up an eyebrow. She did not at all look amused at you storming in.

But you’ve been in the library for twenty minutes and this woman has not given you anything to do to keep you in here.

“Listen, Ms. Peterson. As much as we just love hanging out in this outdated hellhole, I’d rather we go home than just sit here and do nothing for the next hour and a half.”

Her shaky hands didn’t flinch. And she turned her attention back at her screen.

“I’m told to keep you in here for another eight weeks. I’ve had this job for fifty years and I’m not about to lose it to two whiny brats.”

“She’s the only whiny brat here, Ms. P.” Jason rested his elbows on the desk and leaned over beside you. “If you let us out, it’ll be our little secret. C’mon.”

Obviously, that sort of trick works for Jason more times than it would for any ordinary person. But Ms. Peterson was not the one to charm with. And she had the same, dead look in her eye when she turned her head at the young man.

“Sit. Down.”

“What the hell are we supposed to do?”

“I don’t care. Just get your asses on those chairs and sit. Oh look! A person in need of service. There’s your job. Go do it.”

Only one guy was standing behind you. You snarled at him, eyes narrowed. You were almost growling beneath your breath which made him visibly stand back. Jason looked at him over his shoulder with less fear factor but with the same annoyance.

The sight of you both made him almost piss his pants.

“Uhm,” he gulped. “Can you please show me where sci fi books are at?”

You cocked up an eyebrow, glancing at your nails before nudging Jason with your shoulder. He grunted at you, giving you that same ‘I really fucking hate you’ look on his face he’s practically embedded onto his own skin by now. You shrugged, looking back at your nails. Then Jason stood straight and held the guy by the shoulder.

“Go through that aisle. Third shelf from the right.”

“He asked you to go with him, Todd.”

His glare on you was really starting to show. “He can find it himself.”

The poor guy gulped and viciously nodded to agree with Jason. He walked away, making sure not to catch your eye. You lifted your elbows from the librarian’s desk and spared the old lady another snarky look, to which she didn’t even bother to notice. Both of you sitting back on the empty table, Jason placed his arm crossed over the other on the surface and leaned his head over to at least try having a nap. His hair was all sprawled out. You, on the other hand, leaned back, head hanging on your neck, and closing your eyes hoping time would fly by faster that way.

It didn’t.

Two weeks. It had been two fucking weeks. And yet, you were far from being halfway through this macabre series of events. Why couldn’t you have just punched that Maxwell kid in the face? Or threatened to murder him in his sleep? Anything else would have been better. Anything that would’ve landed you in an entirely different situation than to be stuck here with an old woman stricter than a Belle Reeves prison guard.

You could either look at the windows out the library, find a book and actually read one of them (though if they had any more of Poe’s you’d likely get your hands on them).

Or just stare at the eye candy in front of you.

Your smirk was less obvious when you glanced over the veins on his large, muscled arms, folded on top of the other with his skin stretched. His thick, black hair that was long enough to cover most of his forehead, now sticking onto his arm. His neck that was long and thick, his thin shirt and how even more lean muscles would pop out when he’d unintentionally flex. You often caught sight of his stomach when he’d reach over a shelf that was at the top most level, and the ‘V’ shape on his skin was more than eminent enough for you to picture. He wasn’t absolutely huge, especially since he was just 17. But he was definitely fit.

You wouldn’t mind looking at that for a while. Not until he starts talking, anyway. For long minutes, that was what you did, then you got bored.

The tip of your boots kicked his shin under the table. He jumped up, startled, almost growling at you with dark bags under his eyes.

“The fuck do you want now?”

“Someone’s a bit angsty today,” your evil little smirk ticked off another of his nerves. You could tell. He let out a large sigh, started leaning back against the back of his chair, then spread out his arms behind his head to stretch.

Ooooooh shit. There is was. The veins.

“I didn’t sleep last night.” Jason finished stretching and went back to lean against the table. “You done gawking?”

“Cute.” You scrunched up your face to mock him. “I’m bored.”

“And what am I supposed to do with that?”

“Help me sneak out of here.”

“Two weeks here. You think I haven’t tried sneaking out once or twice? That woman’s got the eye of a fucking hawk.”

“Is there any other way out of here?”

“I doubt it.”

Your groan was indefinitely long, stretching the back of your neck when you opted to reach for your phone.

“I’m at three percent.”

Jason took out his own phone. “Mine’s at five.”

“That blackout from last night reach your monster mansion, too?”

He snarled at you and rolled his eyes. “Bruce has generators to power up the whole place when we need it.”

“Then why are you at five percent?”

“Because I’ve been tinkering on this sorry little fucker the last thirty minutes.” He held it up with just his fingers. It had a cracked screen. It looked too old to even be used. “Battery drains faster than my patience.”

“Can’t your new rich dad buy you another one?”

“He did. I don’t wanna use it. Just doesn’t feel like mine.”

“Ah. You're one of those guys. ‘My parents are rich, not me’ kind of dudes. You’re all the same kinds of annoying.”

“I don’t act all high and mighty, for your information.”

“I’m just saying,” you raised your arms up. “If I were you’d I’d at least enjoy his wealth. It’s stupid if you don’t take advantage of things you clearly already have.””

He silently shook his head and looked to the side like you wouldn’t understand even if you tried. Scoffing, you turned away, and you caught the eye of Maxwell, who had a sling on his arm still.

“Holy fuck,” you reached for your bag. “I can't believe I fucking forgot.”

“What?”

Pouring out the contents, you mumbled. “Help me with this thing and I swear I owe you a huge favor.”

“I think watching you wallow in your pain would be more worth my time.”

“That sounds more like my line. You’re taking after me. Good. And I’d say likewise if I wasn’t so desperate, Todd.” You started pouring out pieces of paper, a bottle of glue, and a pair of the largest scissors Jason’s ever seen.

“Is that-“

“The scissors that sent that guy to therapy?” You pointed at Maxwell. “Yes. Yes they are.”

“Jesus.” He took it from your hands. “No fucking wonder.”

“Stop ogling and help me.”

“What the fuck are you supposed to do?”

“Remember the project that kid spilled his coffee on? This is it. I finished it that day and now I have to do it all over again. They gave me another two weeks to do it and I completely forgot about it until now. I’m supposed to make a stained-glass kind of picture. But with cutting pieces of colored paper.”

Jason took the paper you had on the table.

“These are all white, black, gray, and one sheet that’s dark red.”

You shrugged. “I like working with those colors. Now help me. I wanna do this.” You pulled out your phone and showed him a saved photo of one you’d like to copy. He almost jumped out of his seat when you suddenly showed him a picture of a deranged clown with a big red nose, a smile much larger than half his face, and eyes dark and dwelling enough to give him nightmares.

“I wanna know what type of dark shit you’re on.”

“It’s just a clown.”

“I am not helping you on your little art project.”

“Please.” Your hands were down, your eyes widened but not the threatening kind. And your voice, it was definitely the softest he’s ever heard it. Twitching an eyebrow like he was watching your every move, Jason didn’t flinch.

He looked at the clock. Then back at you with his eyeballs rolled all the way around.

“You’re lucky I literally have nothing better to do.”

You propped your shoulders up and gave him a black piece of paper and a pair of scissors. “Great. Cut these into the shapes I drew here.”

A disgruntled groan and a sharp snatch from your hands, Jason looked just as cranky as you usually were. It was amusing. He glared at you and you just smiled back. “Thanks, Jay.”

“Shut up and get to work.”

Your eyes lingered a bit longer on him, even when he’d started to fiddle with your too-large scissors, and you rolled your eyes with a bit of a smile.

“What’s making you so grumpy today?”

He didn’t bother looking up at you. His brows were all scrunched up as he cut the black piece of paper.

“I told you. I didn’t get to sleep last night. I was… out. Why are you grumpy all the time?”

You squinted your eyes at him then went to work. Carefully, he went through the first paper and gave you the shapes you wanted. You set aside your own batch and you took out the larger, white paper on which you’d glue it all on.

“Okay. Give me the shapes.”

You took out the glue and started pouring it on the paper.

“You’re doing it all wrong.”

“I know what I’m doing.”

“You clearly don’t.” He snatched it from you and started wiping the glue off with his finger, spreading it around. “I can't believe I’m fucking doing this.”

“And what are you doing exactly?” you snarled.

“Pouring the glue in will make it all sticky. You should’ve traced over the outer lines so it wouldn’t crumple.”

“I know that.” You took the glue away from him again, then placed the shape onto the paper. “One down.”

“Fucking kill me now.”

“Keep cutting. I’ll handle the glue.”

“Do it right, then.”

You stuck your tongue out at him. He started again with your scissors and went back to snipping off the pieces of paper. Gluing the shapes one by one, you started taking out a red marker and traced the outlines to mimic the flow of blood.

Jason stared at it, then at you, eyes wide with disbelief, then went back to his scissors.

“Excuse me,” a girl went up to you. A freshman, you could tell. “That lady told me you could show me to the young adult section?”

“No. Go away.”

You kept with your glue, not even looking at the girl who just stared at you awkwardly. Jason pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a deep, long sigh. “Go down that aisle. Fifth shelf. Down the very end.”

“Uh. Thanks.” She walked over to where Jason was pointing at. You still didn’t look up from your work. And instead, watched on as Jason continued with cutting the shapes. “You need to chill.”

“Finish those up. That’s the last one.”

Jason rolled his eyes even more, angrily cutting through the pieces of red paper the size of the clown’s big red nose. He dropped the scissors onto the table and just continued to watch you gluing the pieces together with way too much glue.

He gave you no warning before grabbing the glue bottle from you and the shapes, stretching his arm out so you can't reach them.

“TODD.”

“YOU’RE RUINING THE WHOLE THING.”

“NO, I’M NOT.” You cursed with his name and stood up from your chair, reaching out with your arms all the way to him while he desperately wiped off the excess glue for your sake. “GIVE THAT BACK.”

“SIT DOWN.” He cried back at you.

You heard the shrillest shush Ms. Peterson has ever made, before you went back to fumbling with Jason. Your table was at the far end, and she was no longer at your line of sight. He held your wrist, wiping off the rest of the glue, then finally handed the bottle back to you. Putting the shapes onto the paper, you groaned when you slumped back on the chair.

“It looks horrible,” he tried to stifle a laugh.

“Fuck you.”

“At least you’re almost done, right?”

“You put the glue on the shapes then, genius. I’ll paste them on.”

Grumbling with his deep voice, he took the glue bottle and swiped the shapes back over to him. Using thin, barely visible lines, he was so stingy with the glue you wanted to tear your hair out.

“That won't even stick to a fly trap.”

“You want your work to look all crumpled? Go ahead.”

“Just put a bit more.”

“I have the fucking glue bottle,” his eyebrows were raised. “You sit there and wait for me, then you stick them yourself. Start with this.”

He slammed a shape onto the table and you took it, careful not to hit your fingers with the glue. Biting into your gums, you wondered how you’ll be able to handle yet another eight weeks with his kid.

Your bickering didn’t even stop there. It went on, and Jason had to cut even more shapes to make up for some that were far too small. He was practically yelling at this point, and you weren’t about to get yelled at and not respond.

“YOU’RE THE ONE WHO CUT THEM, DINGUS.”

“HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THE RIGHT FUCKING SIZE.”

“I GAVE YOU THE PATTERN. YOU ONLY HAD TO FOLLOW IT.”

“WELL I WOULD HAVE IF YOUR SCISSORS WEREN’T SO DAMN BIG.”

“THEY’RE THE BEST PAIR IN EXISTENCE. YOU JUST CAN'T HANDLE IT.”

“I THINK I CAN HANDLE A PAIR OF SCISSORS.”

“THEN WHY CAN'T YOU CUT BETTER THAN A FUCKING SEVEN-YEAR-OLD.”

“’CUZ THEY DON’T HAVE A FUCKING PARROT SCREAMING AT THEM EVERY FIVE GODDAMN MINUTES.”

The silent yelling didn’t stop. At the end, your voices were too loud that Ms. Peterson would’ve eventually shushed you for the last time and probably throw her slipper at you. Thankfully, she’d gone out to the bathroom and you were left alone.

Everyone else had left. It was almost 5 pm, and you refused to go if your project still wasn’t finished.

“This. Is. The worst day. Of my entire life. And I used to live in the streets.”

“You're not going anywhere. Stay.”

A deep, agonizingly painful groan. He slumped onto the table and buried his face into his arms. “Why can't you just kill me?”

Another set of long minutes, with your attention directly at the glue and scraping off the excess to make it look presentable. It didn’t actually look that bad. The second set of cut shapes were just the right size. Jason didn’t bother looking up. He might have even fallen asleep with you being silent for the longest time since you got there.

No one was left in the library, and it was just starting to get dark.

“Aaaaand THERE.” You placed the finished project onto the table and clapped your hands together in a grinning happiness. Jason, on the other hand, looked as good as dead.

“You may go.”

“You owe me fucking big time, kid.”

You smirked at him when he violently pushed his chair back, grabbed his backpack and went out for the door. You took your time, especially since going home late didn’t seem like such a drag anymore when Dad moved back in. You carefully slipped your collage into your folder and slung your bag over your shoulder.

Jason was still standing in front of the door, hand frozen on the handle you pushed him away and turned it, only for your hand to come at an abrupt stop and the sound of gears halting its turn.

“Where the fuck is Mother Goose?”

“The bathroom-“

But she wasn’t at the bathroom. Unless Ms. Peterson took her large purse and computer along with her to the toilet, she probably wasn’t in there.

“Are we-“

“There has to be a key here.” Jason rummaged through the librarian’s desk. Every drawer he could forcefully pull out, he did.

You pulled out your phone, which was a dead 0%, the image of a drained-out battery staring back at you, and that’s when you started to feel the panic slowly rise. You rushed to the library’s telephone, but you couldn’t even hear a dial tone. The phone was off. Jason’s phone was probably just as dead.

You rushed to the lights to turn them on, but nothing happened.

Fuck. Another blackout. FUCK.

“No key,” he rested his hands on the table. “Shit. FUCK.”

You only stared at each other, feeling that panic start to settle in when you realized you were out of options.

“M-Maybe. Your dad will come pick us up?”

Jason shook his head. “The last time I ran away for the night, he said he wasn’t gonna go around Gotham to pick me up anymore.” He looked at you. “Your parents?”

“Said the exact same thing.”

Your back hit the wall, and you slid down with your head up in the ceiling. Both silent. None of you even said it out loud.

Jason looked like he wanted to scream.

-----

You laid on your back, flat against the table, with just your arm over your eyes to shield it from the light posts outside the window on the driveway. You tried to drown out Jason’s fiddling with his lock pick and the door handle. Two hours had passed, and you’d barely gone by the evening.

“That’s not gonna work.”

“You have a better option, Lydia Deetz?”

You clenched your jaw and sneered. “You’ve been at it for an hour.”

“I’m almost through this.” He kept with his pick, a hairpin he found on the ground which he spent another hour looking for. “Juuuust- THERE!”

You shot up from the table, feet landing enthusiastically onto the floor and you sprinted to Jason’s back. “Here’s to freedom.”

Too eagerly, he turned the handle and pulled the door with a victorious grin.

Only for his hand to jolt at another abrupt stop. The door wouldn’t budge, only peering open through an inch. The grin on his face was immediately lost, and he almost feel out of his feet when you violently pushed him away, pulling on the door yourself and failing.

You could see the deadbolt, but something outside was holding the double doors from opening, no matter which one you pulled on.

“That batshit crazy old witch,” you growled. “Fucking chain locked the door.”

A loud, frustrated groan from Jason as he threw the hairpin to the ground like he would’ve a knife. “WHO CHAIN LOCKS A LIBRARY?”’

You walked away from the door, going back to the tables so you could bend over and stuff your face into your hands. Jason was even more of a mess.

Your dad started his first big fight with mom since he moved back in last night, just when you thought they’d finalized the divorce, he squirms back in. And your room was never far enough to drown out their screams.

That night you wished you were somewhere else. And you ended up somewhere even worse.

Jason was sitting on the floor, back flat against the wall, and his eyes were shut close while you laid back down on top of the table.

“I’m hungry.”

“The fuck you want me to do about that?” Jason kept his eyes shut.

“You got any food?”

“No.”

“Don’t you have something in your bag?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“You think you can stab me with those scissors? ‘Cuz I feel like choking on my own blood right now.”

You rolled over so you were laying on your stomach. Craning your head up to look at Jason, your chin resting on your fingers, you grinned. “I’d rather not spend the night being stuck with your rotting flesh. I’ll kill you in the morning.”

Jason screamed into his hands. “We are not gonna be stuck here until fucking morning.”

“Either you die tonight still in denial or we actually try to survive. Now do you have anything in your bag or what?”

He didn’t give in to picking out his bag without leaving you a dark glare. The sky was completely dark by now. And the only light source you had were three lamp posts outside the window. The power was still off, which meant it was going to be this dark the whole fucking night.

“Would you look at that?” He took out a small protein bar from his smaller pocket. “Forgot that was there.”

You jumped off the table again. “Great. I’m starving.”

You walked too fast to Jason, who immediately stood up and hold you by the shoulder, raising his hand away from your reach. “Ey. Mine. From my bag, remember?��

“I don’t have anything in mine!” you reached and tried to push him, but had no luck against his strength. “Come on!”

“I have way more body mass than you. I need this.”

You pursed your lips, glowering at him even when you knew he still wouldn’t budge. He kept pushing your shoulder from him until you backed away reluctantly.

“WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT?”

You whined and grunted with your back hitting the wall. Jason stepped away facing you and opened the protein bar, took a large bite that left it with almost a third of the whole thing left.

“You know. That thing with the scissors stuck into your neck doesn’t seem like a bad idea anymore.” You grumbled.

Chewing profusely at the bar, he folded his one arm over his chest and smirked while watching you silently grovel in annoyance. You leaned on your side and made sure he wouldn’t hear your stomach starting to growl.

“Fine,” he groaned. “Here.”

A little over a quarter of the protein bar left. Jason handed it over to you and you gritted your teeth.

“There’s barely anything left, you bile-headed twat.”

“You want me to finish it?”

Snatching the bar away from him, you cursed under your breath right before you gobbled up what was left of the snack. It did little to nothing to make you feel less hungry, but at least you weren’t going to die.

“You're welcome.”

You threw the wrapper onto the floor and went back to sitting on the table. “Got anymore bright ideas?”

“Maybe if you’d help, I’d actually be able to tolerate you.”

Jason walked over to the classics shelf, pulled out a book and did the same as you. He swung his legs over on top of the table across you, bringing his knees up so he could rest his elbows on them. He then opened his book.

“You're reading,” you bit your gums. “You’re actually reading at a time like this.”

“What else are we supposed to do in a fucking library?”

Your hands met the surface of the table behind you and you threw your head back. “We have at least until the power comes back on. GOD, this place in insufferable.”

“Never mind the helping. You shutting up would be enough not to drive me insane.”

“And you're less of an ass when you're not a grouch, dickhead.”

“I’m ignoring you now.”

The vein on your forehead started to throb. You weren’t tired yet, and you wouldn’t be able to sleep at this hour even if you tried. You rolled around the table, desperate for any position that wouldn’t drive your limbs numb.

You jolted when you heard Jason curse.

“This fucking lamp post’s too dim. Can't even see shit.”

He set the book aside, laid down on his back and watched the ceiling with you.

“How did we even get locked up?”

“Maybe if you didn’t keep me captive with that stupid clown project for three hours we wouldn’t be in the mess.”

“So it’s my fault now? You're the one who fell asleep!”

“How could you have possibly missed the time? You know the library closes at five!”

“I didn’t fucking know that! I leave before that old witch does every time!”

“Just-.” Jason shut his eyes. “Can we stop screaming for ONE SECOND? Especially since we’re gonna stuck here the whole night?!”

The mocking noise you made was almost inhuman. Jason didn’t bother snarling back.

You saw a car pass by, the headlights shining through the window for the shortest moment. You kneeled on the table and waved your arms around.

“HEY. GET US OUT OF HERE!”

The car kept moving, and the headlights passed through the whole of the window until it left. You slumped back to lay down and groaned. “Fuck everything.”

You grabbed your bag, rummaging through everything inside just to find anything to do or anything that could possibly help you. Nothing. Not even a fan to cool you off when you started to feel the temperature rise.

“Did you call the number I gave you?”

You licked your teeth. “I used the piece of paper you gave me as a bookmark.”

Jason lifted his arm off his head. “No shame in asking for help.”

“I told you, I’m not being fucking abused.” You started picking on the leather of your boots, tracing along the creases of where your toes folded. “I don’t know what the hell made you think I was.”

“It doesn’t have to be actual physical abuse,” he sat up on his elbows.

“You really wanna make us feel uncomfortable? Why do you come to school with bruises all the time?”

“It’s not what you think.”

“Then what is it?”

He cleared his throat. “I’m not gonna fucking tell you, Y/LN.”

“Fine. Then let’s not talk about this.”

You had that usual condescending tone, but you didn’t sound like you were on the verge of lashing out. You sounded like you were pleading, even. Jason bit his lower lip. “Okay. What do you wanna talk about? It’s too early to sleep.”

You brought your knees up to sit cross legged and you leaned in on your elbows.

“Wanna play a game?”

Jason drummed his fingers on the table and sighed. “What?”

You scooched closer to him and swung your legs over the edge of the table. He did the same and faced you. “Give me your hand.”

“What?”

“Just give me your hand, Todd. Don’t be a pussy.”

“Don’t fucking call me that.”

“Then give me your hand.”

Jason snorted, leaning his elbow over his lap and giving his other hand over to you. You took it, smiling at him, then gripping firmly onto his wrist. “Make a fist.”

He fisted his hand and you could see a few veins pop out on his arm. You started rubbing the outside of his fingers. His eyes scrunched up, watching you. “Open your hand.”

He opened it, then you lightly slapped it with your own palm. “Fist,” you said again. He breathed and pulled it again to a fist. You repeated your first action with a growing smirk. “If I come out of this with one hand left-“

“Shut up. Open again.”

He opened his palm. And with a single finger, you tapped onto the center of his hand, then released your grip on his wrist.

Jason widened his eyes, amused. “It tingles.”

“I know right.” You folded your arms.

“Where’d you learn to do that?”

“That’s a secret.”

He then reached out his other hand to you. “Do it again.”

You laughed and snorted before grabbing his wrist, rubbed his fingers the same way you did the first time. Jason leaned over closer to look at your movements, and his nose was all scrunched up like it would when he was focused on a book. The corner of your mouth lifted, then you tapped his hand with your finger and let go.

“What sorcery is this?”

You shrugged, leaning back and folding your arms. “You have any tricks of your own?”

“Yes I do,” he said, swinging his legs over the edge of the table. “Hold out your hand.”

You did so without hesitation. Jason held your fist, then looked straight at you. “Pick a finger and don’t tell me what it is.”

“Okay?” Your ring finger. Easy enough.

“Look straight into my eyes. Don’t look down.”

You rolled your eyes slightly to the side, licking the inside of your teeth, then did as told.

He was looking straight at you, not even trying to blink. A smirk formed on his lips, and his eyes had that same flick of a glare, but there was a little shine on them from the dim lamp post. You shook your head while still maintaining eye contact and felt his other hand start toying with your fingers.

“It’s your ring finger.”

“Huh,” you shuffled closer to him. “Do it again. I wanna watch your hands.”

“No. You have to look straight at my eyes.”

“Fine. Just do it again. I’ll pay more attention.”

The corners of his eyes crinkled, and you both tried your best to hold back emerging bursts of laughter while he continued to toy with your fingers and trying not to blink.

“You're not choosing a finger.” He said.

“Not true. You just suck.”

It was true. You forgot to choose a finger. The middle finger this time. You shifted your focus, but the way he’d try to hold back a laugh made you choke. “Stop laughing.”

“I’m not.” He so was. You felt him touch your fingers, moving around them one by one. “You’re trying to look for movements.”

“Nope. It’s the middle finger.” He kept at it. Over and over, with you refusing to admit he read your mind.

His hands started feeling warmer each time. You didn’t know you noticed.

-----

A bustling, screeching noise of a cart being hauled around the room for the past ten minutes. You’ve been here for five hours. You were tired, starving, and sweating. You covered most of your face and ears with your hands, but the cart’s noises just kept going.

You shot up from the table. “DUDE. STOP.”

You normally had more insults to scream at him, but at that point of the night, you were all out.

Jason kept going and ignored you. Starting from one end of the library, he pushed the handles of the empty cart, accelerating it with his feet. When he gained the momentum, he placed his feet on the metal and rode it across the room. “Real mature.”

“Don’t be an old hag.”

He accelerated again from the opposite end, then climbed on. Jason went faster this time and just narrowly missed a shelf.

“There’s another cart right there if you have the balls to join me.”

You placed your weight on your arm, watching Jason sprint from one end of the room to the next. With a loud grunt, knowing you wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway, you jumped off the table.

You emptied the cart from the remaining books and pushed it to Jason’s side, who waited for you just by the shelves. “Jump when it speeds up.”

“I know what to do.”

He laughed. “Race you to the other side.”

You gripped on the handle firmly, watching the end of the room, the one lined with heavy bookshelves, and readied yourself. “GO.”

You sprinted the two carts and grabbed on with your life as you sped down the large enough room, feeling the air slightly cooler when it was rushing past your skin and hair. You laughed playfully, stopping just before you hit the shelf. “I win.”

“Are you kidding me? I was waiting for you.”

“One more lap.”

“You’re on.”

Again, you sped past the room. You held onto one side of the handle too hard and accidentally hit Jason’s cart, both of you almost tumbling to the ground. “I call foul!”

“It was an accident!” you laughed, then took the cart again to finish the lap. He caught up with you and you no longer stopped in between, continuously sprinting and jumping onto the metal all across the room. You rode past the shelves, the narrow aisles, narrowly missing the books. You almost hit the tables with the carts and you definitely hit the wall too hard when you stopped too late. Jason was trailing right beside you, then he went about his own route.

That’s when he purposefully hit the front your cart with your own, throwing you off on the ground. “FUCK”

He laughed too hard. “Come on. I have another game.”

Holding his hand out to you, you grabbed on and he pulled you up to your feet. You stood close to him, both of you still laughing. And you were staring too long at his face being close to yours. You pulled away from his lingering grip, looking at the ground.

Setting his own cart aside, he pulled on yours, settling it between the aisle of the shelves. It went straight through the longest path down the room, and you’d have to be lucky to miss the shelves. “Hop on.”

“Todd, if you throw me out the window-“

“Come on. Don’t be a pussy.”

You felt the rush, and you liked how free you felt rushing through the air. You climbed into the cart, grabbing hold of the edges and focused on the end of the room.

Jason leaned in to your ear. “Don’t scream.”

“JASON.”

He was incredibly strong, pushing you in the cart like you weighed nothing and sped through the room faster than he previously had. The cart was growling and was so ready to break apart, but you never felt that kind of thrill since you last rode a coaster. You definitely screamed, a high-pitched shriek you know Jason must never mention to anyone, ever. But you were also laughing your stomach out when Jason turned you around, sped to the other end again. And this time, his feet jumping onto the cart.

You threw your head back, laughing, then you caught a glimpse of his face flashing the brightest smile you’ve ever seen on him.

Your laughter came to an abrupt stop when he stopped the cart too late and crashed against the shelf. You both stood still, watching it toppling like an unsteady jenga tower.

Holding your breath, you heard books fall to the floor, then the shaking mellowed down and you released your breaths when it finally stopped. Turning to Jason and falling into the cart laughing, you clutched at your stomach. “JESUS CHRIST.”

“Not funny!” he cried out, but even he was stifling a laugh. He walked over to the front and placed the books into the cart with you. Some fell on your lap, and you took the books from him and placed them to your side.

“At least we have something to do now.”

“Yeah. Especially since you put these books in the wrong shelf. These belong over there.” He pointed to a shelf nearby.

“Let’s fix it then,” you said, still not moving from the cart. He placed all the books from the floor onto you and moved the cart to the corner.

“You’re heavy.”

“Shut up. From now on, we shelf books this way.” You took a book from your lap and gave it to him, who placed the book in its right place.

“Top shelf,” you smirked.

“I know where to put them.” He took it from your hand and shoved it in place. You didn’t have many books to begin with, but even after that, he continued to push the cart, with you still hitching a ride, and you walked around the library to just look at all the books.

“Everything’s in the right section.”

“Because of me. You made a shit ton of mistakes.”

You threw your head back, looking at him. And from that angle you could see his glare turn into a smile. You leaned against the back of the cart, your head lightly touching his arm.

When you’ve managed to tour the whole library, you sat up.

“You're turn. Get in here.”

Jason wanted to laugh at that. “You’d never be able to lift me.”

“Watch me try.”

You hopped off the cart, pushing him aside from the handle. He shook his head, but eventually climbed on like you had. He was bigger than you, so he looked a lot more uncomfortable with his knees folded way up and his arms barely fitting inside the cart.

He was really heavy. But you managed. Pushing the cart slowly at first, Jason leaned in to the left side to steer you off. “Jason!”

“I see stray books. Go over there.”

You pushed the cart with whatever might you had. When you reached the desk, Jason took the books you previously set aside and placed them on his lap. “Braille,” he said. “These go all the way to the back.”

“I can handle this. I’m a big girl.”

You pushed the cart, eventually gaining speed, but it wasn’t nearly as fast as when he’d pushed you around. You reached the far back, with two sharp turns that nearly killed your back, then stopped with a loud breath.

“You're right. We should do this more often.”

You were panting by that time, and Jason handed you the books to place on the shelf. “Chop chop.”

-----

Two fucking am. The power was still out. Jason was definitely going to call the electricity company when you both get out of here. You were sat cross legged on one side of the long, narrow table, fiddling with your sleeves since you couldn’t sleep. He was laying on the same table but facing the opposite way, closing his eyes and feeling the beginnings of light slumber. His back was going to kill him eventually, but when the rush from that cart fiasco died down, he was so awfully tired.

Jason laid his head on his arm, closing his eyes as tightly as he could.

Then a warm, soothing melody started to buzz through his ears, a tune he’s never quite heard of before. His eyelids suddenly grew softer, feeling the humming song vibrate through him.

Where was it coming from?

He slowly opened his eyes, trying to find the source. Jason craned his head up to you, with your back turned to him, and realized you were the one humming.

You turned to him, and he went back to closing his eyes, pretending to sleep. “Jason?” you lightly asked, not enough to wake him if he was actually asleep. You turned your back around and crouched over to relax.

He wasn’t sleeping anymore, but he kept closing his eyes. A little while later, with you thinking he wasn’t conscious, he heard you actually start to sing.

 You got a fast car

I want a ticket to anywhere

Maybe we make a deal

Maybe together we can get somewhere

Anyplace is better

Starting from zero got nothing to lose

Maybe we'll make something

Me, myself I got nothing to prove

 Then you paused. Your voice was so soft and light, he never would’ve have heard it if there was anyone else in the room or if he wasn’t awake. You never would’ve sung if you knew he was, though.

You had the most beautiful voice he’s ever heard in his life.

 You got a fast car

I got a plan to get us out of here

I been working at the convenience store

Managed to save just a little bit of money

Won't have to drive too far

Just 'cross the border and into the city

You and I can both get jobs

And finally see what it means to be living

 Your voice was low, a beautiful, vibrating low. An alto. And there was that deep, breathy growl when you reached the lower notes with ease. A light vibrato at the end of the vowels, and there was that drowsy, slow feel to it that just made it seem like you didn’t make that much effort at all. At some points, you whispered the words, like your everyday screaming never affected your vocal chords at all.

There was a tug at his chest, his face started to burn up. He was wide awake by now, and there was that thudding within him that was too hard to ignore. And it worsened each time you breathed out the end of the verses.

You managed to finish the song, and by then, he was a mess.

You didn’t sing anything more, no matter how much he wished you would. He ended up fighting his tiredness, just in case he’d miss another song.

But right before he drifted to sleep, he realized he’d been smiling his cheeks off.

-----

Twelve hours.

You were stuck in the library.

For twelve fucking hours.

Both of you shot up from the table the moment you heard the chains outside the door clink to the ground. You and Jason raced out the door, and before the security guard could totally open it, you violently pushed it aside and raced out into the wide-open space of the driveway outside the gates. The poor guard looked puzzlingly at you. But since he was too old to care or even ask about what happened, he shrugged it off.

The cool air felt heavenly against your skin, and the bright sun, smiling back at you against your face. You spread your arms out and took in the breeze as much as you could. Jason was fanning himself with the collar of his shirt, raising his arms up the same way you were. “AHHHHH.” He screamed. And you did the same. The frustration went out the window as fast as you’d ran.

“FUCKING FINALLY.”

“THAT IS NEVER HAPPENING AGAIN.”

“NEVER.”

You faced the sky, still taking the deep, fresh intakes of air. Jason placed his hands on his hips and ruffled his sweat covered hair.

“Don’t tell anyone about this.”

“Agreed,” you said. “Not even Ms. Peterson.”

“Not a single soul.”

You both faced each other, raising your brows, no longer from a glare or out of annoyance. Your body felt light. Your chest felt lighter. You were smiling.

“I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Kudos to us for surviving.”

A high five. And you both laughed, still feeling that flush of relief flow throughout your limbs. No one was in school yet. It was Saturday, though. No one but a few of the faculty members were going to show up.

But the sky looked pink, mixed with a bright yellowish orange. The driveway never looked so clean, and the breeze was so wonderfully cold, with the autumn leaves still floating on the grass and the roads, you just felt happy. Your lingering gaze on Jason helped with that bright smile.

As if twelve hours in the library was nothing. As if it wasn’t torture at all.

As if it was, in fact, the most fun you’ve had in a single night in a long, long time.

“Walk safe.”

“Bye, Todd.”

Walking towards opposite ends of the sidewalk, hands on your sides and not in your pockets like you usually would. You couldn’t stop grinning.

Sparing one last glance behind you, seeing him get on his motorcycle, you turned to the corner of the street.

-----

I DON’T HATE YOU - MASTERLIST

-------

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH PLS TELL ME YOU ENJOYED THAT CUZ I CERTAINLY DID

THE SINGING SCENE IS REALLY INSPIRED BY LIZ GILLIES (REMEMBER THE READER IS BASED ON JADE WEST) SO THE FAST CAR SINGING SCENE WAS ACTUALLY INSPIRED BY THIS VIDEO

Taglist: everyartistwas-firstanamateur  @sarcasmismyfirstlove @damned-queen-of-gotham @idkmanicantenglish @wunderstell @birdy-bat-riya @get-loki@everyday-imfangirling @comic-nerd-dc @multifandoms916 @icequeen208@offendedfishnoises @egdolan @xemiefx @arkhamtoddler @elsenthal@mythicbitchx @supremehaunter @ burning-alive  @lucy-roo  roseangel013bf @ loxbbg  reclusive-chicken-nugget http-cherries shadowsndaisies 

[daddystevee]

you really love her, don’t you?

(steve harrington x fem!reader)

A/N: good lord i feel like i’ve forgotten how to write. Its been way to fucking long. Sorry its basically all dialogue. haha so basically instead of Robin and Steve getting stuck with the Russians, its fem!reader and Steve. Robin, Erica and Dustin go out for help.

Warnings: a few curse words, mention of blood and vomit?

Summary: After being friends for years, reader has always thought that both she and Steve always had some sort of chemistry. But after the first few weeks of summer and working with Robin, she starts to think otherwise. Before the big battle with the mind flayer, reader and Steve let out their true feelings

Work count: 1.6k

•

Steve started off as kind of an acquaintance to you. The two of you would see each other in the hallways at school, and even sat next to each other to talk sometimes in some of your classes. But the day you ended up on the wrong road at the wrong time you got sucked into a scary situation, and it kind of forced the two of you to become friends, and over time best friends.

Throughout the years of fighting with the upside down you had grown to love your best friend. Steve has started to show some interest in you a few months before the two of you graduated. Both you and Steve would go hang out alone, whenever you could, but never really called them dates or anything. He would always act super flirty when he was around you, but you never brought it up to him, hoping he would make the first move.

It all carried on until the two of you scored a summer job at the new Starcourt mall, slinging ice cream at Scoops Ahoy, and he seemed to find some interest in your new coworker, Robin Buckley. You and Steve would still hang out, but when you did he would always ask if Robin could come along. While you didn’t mind Robin coming and hanging out, you wished it could still be just the two of you.

As the summer progressed, both you and Robin cracked a secret Russian code and ended up getting trapped in an underground base for more than 24 hours. You heard Steve get punched too many times, and in the end of it all, both you and Steve got injected with some sort of truth serum.

•

You follow closely behind Dustin going to the front row of the movie theatre, and being told to sit. Both you and Steve do as you’re told.

“Whatever you do, don’t go anywhere.” Dustin says in a very serious tone.

“Fine, dad.” Steve says back sassily, turning to look at you causing the two of you to burst out in laughter.

“We mean it, Harrington.” Robin says in such a way that it makes your giggles die down.

“This movie is pretty boring.” you lean over to whisper to Steve. You tear your eyes away from the screen to look at him as he continuously shoves the popcorn that he had mysteriously picked up, into his mouth.

“You know what’s not boring?” he asks with his mouth still full of popcorn, “Water.”

“I saw a water fountain on the way in here wanna go check it out?” you ask while wiggling your eyebrows at him.

Steve leaned forward to look over to the two smaller children talking to Robin, thinking really hard about what you had just asked.

“But Dustin said to not move.”

“Steve, when have we ever listened to Dustin.”

He leaned back and made eye contact with you and shrugged, throwing the bag of popcorn onto the ground and grabbing your hand, pulling you up and out of the theatre.

•

The two of you stumbled down the hallway and to the fountain, as soon as Steve saw it he ran to it like it was an old friend that he hadn’t seen in years. He instantly stuck his face into the water and drank like it was the last thing he’d ever do.

“That’s amazing”

“Slow down, bucko. Maybe take her on a date first.” you say before grabbing Steves shoulders pushing him out of the way, “It’s my turn, you’ve had enough.”

As you’re drinking the mediocre fountain water, you see out of the corner of your eye, Steve wobble over to the middle of the floor and look up to the ceiling.

“Hey, Y/N.” he says, causing you to lift your head looking in the direction that your name was coming from. “You gotta check this out.”

You take your last sip of water before walking over to the boy and looked up to the ceiling as he was, noticing that the roof was very pretty but starting to spin a little too fast for your liking.

•

After rushing to the bathroom to puke up all that was in your stomach, you and Steve sit on the yellow, white and black checkered floor in silence.

“Hey, the ceiling finally stopped spinning.” you said opening your eyes for the first time since laying down to cool yourself off on the floor.

“Holy shit, you’re right. You think we puked it all up?” he asks

“I think so? Ask me something.”

“Um, when was the last time you peed your pants?”

“Today. When the Russian doctor pulled out that bone saw.”

“Oh, my god.” He let out with a loud chuckle causing you to start laughing.

“It was just a tiny bit!” you say before sitting up against the wall of the stall so you could hear Steve a little bit better.

“Okay, okay my turn.”

“Alright, uh.” you start thinking. Of all of the things you could ask him, one thing comes to mind. “Have you ever been in love?”

“Yup, Nancy Wheeler. But you know how that went.”

“Do you ever feel like you’re still in love with her?”

“No, but I think it’s because I found someone who’s a little better for me.” he admits

You sigh as he continues putting your head on your crossed arms that are on your knees knowing where this is going.

“It’s crazy. You know how ever since Dustin’s gotten home from camp he’s been telling me that I’ve got to find my Suzie. I think I was just scared of Tommy making fun of me or something.”

Robin

“Or that I wouldn’t be prom king or whatever. It was so stupid because the girl I should’ve been hanging out with has been sitting in front of me, the whole time. Cuz first of all, she’s hilarious. She’s so funny.”

Robin

“And, I think she’s so pretty, beautiful even. I’ve never seen anyone as gorgeous as her. She’s smart, way smarter than me. She even helped crack a secret Russian code. She’s honestly unlike anyone I’ve ever met. You know?”

Robin

With your head still low, you felt tears creep their way into your eyes, stinging a little at the corner. You knew you shouldn’t have asked this question, you knew where this would lead. Not thinking about how badly it would actually hurt.

“Y/N?” you heard followed by a little knocking on the stall in front of you, causing you to lift your head a little and look in that direction. “Y/N, did you just OD in there? “

You sniffled a little wiping the tears that had fallen onto your cheeks on the back of your hand, “No, I’m fine. I’m still alive.” you say followed by a deep breath.

Suddenly you see a pair of feet slide under the divider, followed by the rest of Steve.

“So what do you think?” he asks you with a hint of hopefulness in his eyes.

You take another small breath before looking up at the bruised boy in front of you. “About?”

“This girl?”

“She sounds amazing, and perfect for you.” you say knowing he’s talking about Robin.

“Yeah? You really think?” he asks excitedly.

“I mean yeah, it sounds like you really love her, don’t you?”

“I really do.” he responds looking into your eyes while reaching for your hand. You pull your hand away from him kind of quickly with tears forming in your eyes, causing his brows to furrow in confusion.

“What- what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

“It’s nothing, nothing. I’m really happy for you, I think you and Robin are great for each other.” you say looking down into your lap.

“Wh- Robin? I wasn’t talking about Robin. I- I was talking about you.”

“You what?”

“I love you, you dingus.” he says as a small smile falls onto his lips. Steve switches sides, moving to sit much closer to you. You place your hand on his face, rubbing your thumb across his un-bruised cheek.

“I love you too, Steve.” You weren’t sure who leaned in first, but the kiss was short and sweet and it wasn’t like you had imagined. But given the circumstances, a dirty bathroom floor was not the place to have a long and passionate kiss.

“You know, that wasn’t anything like I had imagined it.” you say looking at Steve.

“I know, kissing on the bathroom floor covered in blood and vomit wasn’t exactly part of the plan for me either.” he says in response causing you to burst into a fit of giggles slowly turning into laughter. You were pretty sure you both still had some drugs in your system, but you felt better knowing that Steve felt the same way you felt about him.

While still laughing, you lean into kiss him another time but mid kiss Robin busts through the door with Erica and Dustin following close behind. You and Steve turn to look at your friends and Robin has a smirk on her lips as if she’s about to say something, but is instantly cut off by Erica.

“It’s about damn time, nerds. You two have been eyeballing each other since, the beginning of the summer.” she says with her arms crossed, rolling her eyes, and for some reason this caused the two of you to laugh even more. Sure it wasn’t perfect, but you now had a new sense of strength to make it through this, knowing that you had Steve by you and would be there for you on the other side of it all.

[aricazorel]

12 from the fluffy prompts for f!shenko please!

Thank you so much for the ask!

“This reminded me of you.” from this list

Rebecca Shepard x Kaidan Alenko; ME3, Citadel DLC; 1548 words

Spending the first few days of mandatory shore leave chasing your own clone and recovering your stolen ship was not how Rebecca Shepard had envisioned the time off. She hadn’t expected Anderson to give her his apartment either, but she wouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Instead she decided to spend the time as ordered: off duty while she caught up with friends, took it easy, and spent quality time with Kaidan. Granted her shore leaves had always been hit or miss on whether other people enjoyed them with her but Kaidan was different. She knew him. Really knew him and thought she might be able to find things they both enjoyed doing.

That’s why she stopped into a random store in one of the lower wards market districts. It screamed Kaidan Alenko. The ward itself was home to a mixture of races and was a prime area for tourists to frequent. And that was what she was at the moment. Not the Commander, not the Savior of the Citadel, not the galaxy’s beacon of hope against the impossible. Just a tourist looking for a gift for her nerdy boyfriend and did that shop fit the bill. Thankful she actually listened to his random facts at all hours of the day and night, she was sure to find something he liked.

The whole concept of the store was based on interesting and unique things from Earth’s past. As one of the newer species on the galactic scene, humanity was still a curiosity to some. The oddities of Earth’s pop culture from past centuries permeated the shelves, racks, and display spaces in the specialty shop.

Shepard roamed the aisles looking for a specific pop culture icon from the late 20th-early 21st centuries. Surely they had something related to his nerdy obsession. After all he had been through and all he did for her, he deserved something familiar, something comforting, something distinctly Kaidan.

Finally at the very back of the store, she found it. All sorts of items: tee shirts, hats, figures, plushies, OSDs with movies and TV series, models, and much more. But one thing in particular caught her attention. A box containing what looked to be a collection of several items. Ones she knew Kaidan would love.

Her target acquired, the Commander- turned- tourist quickly paid for it and made her way back to the apartment. If she were lucky, Kaidan would still be out with Cortez, Vega, and Joker at the arcade. She could wrap it and surprise him.

Hopefully…

~~~~~

“Hey, Becca! I’m back,” Kaidan’s voice called from the living room.

“I’m in here,” she shouted from the bar area. The large box sat on the coffee table in front of her as The Battlespace played on the large vid screen but muted.

The Major rounded the wall partition as he commented, “Joker still wants to have that party. Tried all evening to get Steve, Vega, and me to convince you to agree to it.”

“I told him I’d think about it,” Rebecca groaned from the couch.

“Yeah, well you know Joker. He gets an idea and won’t let go until he gets his way,” Alenko replied as he came to stand by the couch, the artificial fire crackling behind him.

“Yeah. I know but all I want to do right now is spend time with you,” she said tossing her red hair over her shoulder. “Alone.”

“I’m all yours tonight, Becca,” he assured her as his whiskey-colored eyes flickered to the coffee table. “I promise.”

Shepard grinned. “Something catch your eye, Major?”

“You always have my eye, Shep,” he said with a lop-sided grin.

“You’ve gotten better with your flirting,” she noted as he approached the table.

“Who said I was flirting? I thought I was simply stating a fact,” Alenko commented, winking at her.

“Kaidan,” the Commander murmured as she felt herself blush lightly.

“It’s true,” the L2 biotic said as he pointed to the box. “But what it that?”

“It’s a box.”

“Becca.”

“It’s a wrapped box.”

“Shepard.”

“It’s a wrapped box with something allegedly inside it.”

“Rebecca Jane Shepard!”

The Commander laughed as she held up her hands as if in surrender. “Okay! Okay! No reason to sound like my dad.”

Kaidan made a face. “Don’t ever say that again. That’s just…weird.”

Rebecca laughed again as she motioned towards the box. “It’s for you.”

“Me?” the Major asked in surprise. “From who?”

She frowned as she replied indignantly, “Me, Alenko. Unless you have other women gifting you things behind my back.”

“Hell, no,” the second human Specter exclaimed as he reached for the box.

“No guys either?” she teased as he sat down on the couch beside her.

With the box in his lap, he gave her an incredulous look. “Sweetheart, while I do like both men and women, I only love you.”

Shepard was left speechless by his honesty as he quickly kissed her cheek. He gave her a grin and began to unwrap the box. Her once emotionally reserved Lt. was not so any longer, and it suited him. It suited him very well.

“You didn’t have to get me anything.”

“You always say that, and you know I’m gonna do it anyway.”

“Yeah, well I still think you don’t have to…”

The Commander grinned as he went silent. His fingers traced over the edges of the box as his eyes flickered from one image to another on the side facing him. She leaned forward to look at him better. His expression was one of surprise and something she couldn’t place.

“I found it at an Earth novelty shop in one of the wards,” she said softly.

Kaidan nodded as she continued to look over the box.

“This,” Rebecca said motioning to the focus of his attention, “reminded me of you.”

“I had some like these when I was a kid,” Kaidan murmured as he opened the box. “My mom found them somewhere. Used to put them together to distract me from my biotics when I got frustrated with them.”

Shepard smiled as he pulled out several smaller boxes, each of a different model kit. She watched as his smile widened as he told her the name of each ship the model was supposed to build. A look of fondness for a childhood memory on his handsome features the entire time.

“This one’s an X-wing—Red 5. Luke’s ship…This is the Millennium Falcon—a YT-1300…Ummm, this is a TIE Fighter and a…TIE Advanced—Vader’s I think…A Star Destroyer—Venator class used during the Clone Wars and a…Oh wow! It’s the Ebon Hawk!”

Shepard recognized all the ships except the last one from binge watching the Star Wars movies and series with him in the hospital. “Come again?”

He turned to her excitedly. “It’s the ship from a couple of Star Wars video games. I had an emulator for them growing up. I might still have it…”

“So it’s a good thing?”

He nodded with a broad grin. “It was a fun couple of games. I can show them to you some time but…”

“But what?”

“Well, my mom used to say the pilot of the ship sounded a little like me,” he said rubbing the back of his neck, clearly a little embarrassed. “It might be weird.”

She looked at him thoughtfully. “Maybe it’s just one more thing that can remind me of you. You are weird in a special kind of way.”

Kaidan gazed at her happily. “This mean a lot to me, Becca. Just like you do. Thank you.”

“I’m glad,” she said looping an arm though his.

He went back to inspecting the model kits as she laid her head against his shoulder.

“You know,” she began, “when you get those put together I think there might be enough room to display them in the case in the loft.”

He turned to her. “You’d put my model kits from Star Wars with your models of real ships?”

“Yeah, why not?”

“Umm, because they’re not—”

“Not what, Kaidan?” she asked. “They are important to you and you are important to me.”

He looked at her with cynically. “While that does sound sweet and sincere, is that really the only reason?”

“Well, of course it is,” she replied. Shepard paused and winced. “Welllll, that and I think most of them look badass…except for the TIE. It looks like a messed-up eyeball.”

Alenko laughed. “Oddly enough that was a nickname the Rebels and New Republic pilots gave them. The TIE/LN starfighter and the TIE/D Defender specifically. I—”

“Alright, my handsome nerd, I get you are excited and I’m glad you like them, but I thought we were spending the night together. Alone. Do I need to be jealous of the model kits?”

“No, Becca. I’m all yours,” he said setting them aside as he leaned over. Kissing her, he suggested, “We could watch the movies though.”

“Hmmmm,” she said. “We could as long as it isn’t too distracting.”

“If you want my full attention all you ever have to do it ask.”

“I know. And I love you. You and all of your nerdiness too.”

“Oh good. I was worried…”

“Kaidan.”

“I love you too.”

She smiled. Rebecca would always love him. Everything about him. Everything.  

[chiseler]

Tales of the Unexpected:  SANTA CLAUS

Most of my life I’d been haunted by an image—five seconds from a film I could not name: Santa, in someone’s living room on Christmas Eve, fires a toy cannon at a demon’s ass. That’s all, but it stuck with me for decades. The only thing I was sure about was that it came from a film my father had taken me to see when I was four or five. There was snow in the theater parking lot.

It clearly wasn’t a typical holiday film, so as the years progressed I decided it must have been Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (co-starring Jamie Farr and Pia Zadora as martians), but I was mistaken. There are no demons in that movie. I asked my dad, but he had no idea what the hell I was talking about. Then, as the universe would have it, when I was well into middle age the film was placed in my hands by someone  who had no idea I’d spent much of my life looking for it. Seeing the film in its entirety for the first time in 40 years, I finally understood why things might have turned out the way they did.

When the conversation rolls around to bad Christmas movies, there’s of course a broad spectrum from which to choose. Given that nearly every Christmas movie ever made is insufferable to some degree, it’s generally easier, I’ve found,  to break things down into categories that stretch from the simply godawful (Jingle All the Way) to the agonizingly painful (A Very Brady Christmas or that Marlo Thomas remake of It’s a Wonderful Life) to the merely baffling (An Ewoks Christmas). Of course there are some people who think they can bring the conversation to an abrupt end by pulling out Santa Claus Conquers the Martians as the last word on holiday cinema. There’s simply nothing more to say.

Oh, but that’s far too simple. There’s another level out there. Something that reaches far beyond banal categorizations like “good” and “bad” and even “weird,” deep into the almost unfathomable territory of “brain damaging” and “utterly terrifying,” and a number of adjectives that have yet to be discovered. Films that cannot and should not be called “bad” no matter how easy it would make thinking for the smug hipsters in the Mystery Science Theater crowd. These are films that come from another plane, another universe, another way of thinking, and for that they remain fascinating, and cannot be so easily dismissed.

In the 1950s and ‘60s, K. Gordon Murray was an American film producer and distributor who made a decent living for himself by picking up the rights to foreign genre pictures (mostly from Mexico), dubbing them into English, and renting them to U.S. theaters. English-speaking audiences can thank Murray for The Brainiac and Robot vs.The Aztec Mummy.

In 1956 he bought the rights to a children’s holiday picture directed by René Cardona, a man better known for horror and exploitation pictures like Survive! and Night of the Bloody Apes. Instead of widespread distribution, Murray limited the film to short (two or three day) runs around the holidays, when the film would only be shown as a children’s matinee. In retrospect I have to wonder if he limited viewings that way because he knew what kind of effect the film would have on people.

Santa Claus sounds about as innocuous as they come. Who would even pay attention to a title like that?  It’s only when you note the shrill, almost frantic tone of some of the taglines attached to the film that you begin to get some sense that there’s something else going on here—that this isn’t another Rankin/Bass production:

Bursting upon our BIG SCREEN in all the colors of the rainbow… a prize-winning blue ribbon treat for old and young alike! Here’s something for the whole family to see together!

Another tagline makes it sound even more ominous:

See All the Weird and Wonderful Characters of Make-Believe! The Fantastic Crystal Work-Room of the Happy Elves! The Fabulous Realm of the Candy-Stick Palaces!

Those families who weren’t scared away by those dire warnings were never the same again.

René Cardona

In  Cardona’s vision, Santa (José Elías Moreno)  lives in a cloud kingdom in space, positioned in a stationary orbit above the North Pole. Instead of elves, Santa has collected groups of children from all corners of the world—North and South America, Europe, Asia, Africa. It’s unclear who these children belong to or if they’re in space willingly, but they open the film with a long recital of traditional songs from each nation.

Ten minutes later we cut to Hell. Although this happens in most Christmas movies, few do it so literally. There amid the flames, Satan informs a minor and bumbling demon named Pitch (José Luis Aguirre ‘Trotsky’) that he is to turn all of the children on Earth evil in order to anger “that old goat Santa Claus” and show the people of the world “who their true master is.”

We are then introduced to three storylines: a lonely rich boy whose parents neglect him, a poor girl whose single mother can barely support them both, and three young thugs. Behind each story, we hear Santa’s echoed laughter. Santa laughs through the entire film, often at scenes of misery and despair. It’s unclear why.

Finally and centrally, we see the core of Santa’s orbiting kingdom—an observatory equipped with a collection of surveillance devices that would put the NSA to shame. As the narrator (Murray himself) describes it:

This is Santa’s Magic Observatory. What wonderful instruments! The Ear Scope! The Teletalker, that knows everything! The Cosmic Telescope! The Master Eye! Nothing that happens on Earth is unknown to Santa Claus!

He’s not kidding, either. Santa can see anyone he chooses merely by thinking of them, listen to what they’re saying, even watch their dreams, and these are powers he abuses freely.

There is no reason to attempt to describe the plot any further. It’s not an issue. Visually, however, the film is a thing of deranged  wonder, reminiscent of Japanese films that would be made ten or fifteen years later. It’s a world of remarkable and sometimes frightening imagination. The telescope features a large, roving eyeball instead of a lens. Santa’s sleigh is actually a giant wind-up toy, the living reindeer replaced with carousel reindeer made of white plastic. The color palate throughout the film (if you can find a decent print) is intense. And the film’s multiple dream sequences are, well, pretty jaw-dropping.

It’s also a remarkably subversive film—which intertwined both with the visuals as well as the director’s background, may be no surprise at all. Along with the kidnapped children he’s using as slave labor, the cannon he fires at the demon’s ass, and  Santa’s often inappropriate laughter, which snakes throughout much of the soundtrack, there’s Merlin, another of Santa’s employees. Merlin runs a drug lab, and on Christmas Eve has just developed a “magic powder” that will “give people a sound sleep and fill them with wonderful thoughts and good intentions.”

Santa is perfectly willing to deliver babies to children who request little brothers or sisters, and one good little boy is set to receive “an atomic lab and a machine gun.” And then of course there’s the role of the demons here, in a world in which Santa and his toys have replaced Christianity.

It’s a film that’s often mocked by fools for its cheap sets and bad acting, without pausing to think about what’s really going on here—the kind of twisted, alien imagination at work, or the ideas that Cardona is sneaking in under their smug noses. It’s a deeply strange and disturbing work, a visionary work on a minuscule budget, and one that says more about the holidays than we may care to think about.

Maybe that’s why my dad has blocked it out of his memory, and why I spent a lifetime trying to track it down.

by Jim Knipfel

[fanfoolishness]

trimmings (SUF)

Greg Universe, post-Bluebird.  Who is he now?  Angst, Greg/Rose, and a little father-son bonding. 1568 words.

***

He’d been fifteen years old when he’d last gotten a haircut.  Younger than Steven was now.  The thought struck him as almost funny as he stood in Steven’s bathroom, his scalp aching, his eyes puffy, his head feeling strangely light.  Greg ran a hand through his shorn hair and winced, long strands coming away between his fingertips.

The van revved, a harsh sound all the louder for coming from inside the living room. He’d have to thank the Gems once they managed to get it back outside the house, but for now he grimaced, shoulders jerking.  He tried not to think about Bluebird dangling him twenty feet above the ground, but it was hard not to when his scalp still throbbed.  

And when he looked in the mirror.

“You can do this, Universe,” he muttered.  He’d barely been able to look at himself after Steven had told him to go inside -- he’d called him Father, what the hell was up with that?  Still, Steven had had a point.  All Greg had been able to do was listen to his kid and hide in the bathroom, crying from the unexpected shock of the fight and the horrible sight of his long hair held in his arms.  

But the adrenaline was over now.  He’d seen Bluebird fly off into the distance, and he’d let his hair go into the sea, and he’d leaned on his son in a way he never had before.  Now all that was left was the clean-up.

“Come on guys, help me get this up onto the warp --” Greg heard Steven through the bathroom door.  

“I’m trying,” Amethyst grumbled.  There was a horrible skurr noise. He hoped the van would survive their attempts to move it.

Greg thought briefly of going out to see what they were doing, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to help.  Sometimes he felt so human around them.  

He still wasn’t sure how Bluebird had gotten the van inside in the first place, anyway.  All he remembered were the van doors flying open and a nasty little hand grabbing his leg.  He bent down stiffly and lifted up his pants leg, unsurprised to see a ring of bruise marks around his ankle.  He straightened back up, resolving not to tell Steven about it.

Greg shook his head.  Don’t think about it.  It’s over now.  They weren’t here for you anyway.  A flash of anger flared and faded, thinking of how they’d tried to use him to get to Steven.  Yet he was the one with his hair poofing around his ears, long ragged strands wisping out at random places, the unevenness almost as painful as the loss itself.

“What a mess,” he murmured.  He let out a long, shaky breath, then suddenly remembered.  Hadn’t he gotten Steven one of those beard grooming kits for his birthday?  Just in case?  He rummaged in the cabinet drawer, coming away successful with a sleek wooden kit.  He opened it and removed the scissors, which were comically small for trimming a head partially full of hair, but they would do.  At least he didn’t have to go around looking like he’d chopped his hair off with a knife, even if it was the truth.

He flinched with each snick of the scissor, but it got a little easier as he went.  Hair littered the sink, brown with streaks of gray.  He tried not to wonder if it could grow back. He already knew the answer.  There was a reason rockers in their fifties started cutting their hair.  

He tried to smile.  It hurt his face.

“If you could only see me now, Rose,” he muttered.  He ran his fingers through his somewhat salvaged hair, his hands unused to how the strands ended so abruptly.  His fingers twitched as he slowly lowered his hands to his sides.

Rose would have laughed, if she’d seen him looking this ridiculous.  Oh Greg, what happened to your hair?  You reformed!  I love it!  And somehow he’d wind up laughing too, the pain in his scalp fading, the fear and anger receding into the background, because how could he think about that when Rose was laughing so brightly --

She would laugh, wouldn’t she?

Greg went still.  He thought she would.  She’d laughed at so many things, those dark eyes warm and delighted, her beautiful laugh ringing around him like home, like family.  But now, he wasn’t so sure.

What if he had it wrong?  

What if she didn’t laugh at all?  What if she cried, knowing he’d been in danger?  What if she’d been angry, furious like her Diamond sisters?  What if he didn’t know her well enough now to even guess?  He didn’t know, and he fought back a sudden rising panic, ragged in his chest.

He’d become a different man these past seventeen years, fatherhood and grief and a comet fading all bearing down on him.  Would she even recognize him?  Mr. Universe was a ghost, his rocker hair floating in the ocean, and Greg was a paunchy middle-aged man who let his son fight his battles for him.  Rose had loved the idea of change.  But he’d changed now into someone she didn’t know, down to the terrible short hair, and he wondered if he had finally forgotten who she was -- if he’d lost this, too --

For the second time that day, Greg slid to the floor, buried his face in his hands and cried.

***

There was a knock at the door some time later, a neat little pattern.  Steven, Greg thought blearily.  He always used to amuse himself by coming up with clever rhythms when he knocked on the van, and Greg used to do the same on the screen door.  He hadn’t heard one of those knocks in a long time, though.  Something else he’d almost forgotten.

“Dad?”  His voice was hesitant, low through the door.  “Are you okay?  Should I come in?”

“You can come in, Schtu-ball,” said Greg thickly, scrubbing at his face with one hand, trying to dry his cheeks.  

Steven opened the bathroom door, still in his jacket and pajamas, now stained with grease from the van.  He closed the door carefully behind him.  Greg saw the way he looked at the sink, still full of hair, and the scissors, sitting forgotten on the basin’s edge.  Steven swallowed and sat down beside him.

“How are you doing, Dad?” Steven asked quietly.  

Greg straightened up, leaning against the wall.  His shoulder brushed against Steven’s.  “I’ve had better days.  Worse ones, too.  I’ll be all right.”

“Are you sure?  I heard you, through the door -- Were you hurt?”  Greg studied his son’s face, concerned.  When had Steven started getting shadows under his eyes like that?  Maybe it was just that he’d been woken up so early with all the commotion.

Greg stifled a rueful chuckle.  “Nothing that needs healing powers,” he assured Steven.  He’d be fine in a few days.  “Just… just old stuff.”  He almost said thinking about your mom but stopped himself, remembering the way Steven had stared down Eyeball and Aquamarine, the anger in the set of his jaw.  

He settled on a different truth, an easier one.  “I guess you hold onto something for long enough, it starts meaning an awful lot.  That’s all.”  

Steven was silent for a moment.  “Yeah,” he said slowly.  “I think I know what you mean.”  He rested his head on Greg’s shoulder, and Greg tilted his head until he felt Steven’s hair, thick and soft against his cheek.  They sat there like that for several minutes, staring at nothing in particular.  It was strange to not feel the weight of Steven’s head gently tugging his hair; strange, but still good.

Steven sighed, shifting.  “You hungry?”

“Sure.  Got something in mind?”

He lifted his head from Greg’s shoulder.  “Let’s get some breakfast.  Maybe that brunch place over by the U-Stor?  We haven’t been there in years.  Come on, I’ll drive.”

“Van still out of commission, huh?” Greg asked.

“They managed to warp it over to Little Homeschool, but it’s, uh… wounded,” said Steven, cracking a small smile.  “Pearl says she and Peridot can have it up and running later today.  Maybe by the time we’re done with breakfast.”

“Sounds like a plan,” said Greg.  “Help your old man up, would you?”

Steven scrambled to his feet quickly, then pulled Greg up as if he weighed nothing at all. Maybe to Steven he didn’t, he realized, remembering how easily Steven had caught him.  

“Let me just get changed,” said Steven, opening the door.  He glanced back at Greg, his expression somewhere between a smile and sadness.  “Hey, Dad?”

“Yeah, Steven?”

“You know, I think you can pull off the new look,” he said.  This time, the smile nearly reached his eyes.

Greg chuckled.  “Thanks, kiddo.”  

Steven nodded.  “Back in a minute.”

Greg watched him go.  He turned to leave the bathroom, but remembered the sink.  As he brushed the hair into the wastebasket and blew a few loose strands from the scissors, he caught sight of himself in the mirror.  He tilted his head back and forth at a few angles.  It wasn’t so bad, he supposed.  

He wasn’t sure what Rose would make of it.  He still wasn’t sure what he thought about it.  

But Steven didn’t mind being seen in public with him like this, and that, that he could live with.

[endexe]

                   “Thank you, but nah. They gotta have someone to blame, I guess."

The line will always wander across Zero’s mind the moment they first step into Quinn’s town. Calm words given after a laughter was made, sharper than snapping bones, louder than phantoms’ wails. He then offered Zero a small smile, yet full of assurance it was, when they asked him if they could kill harm those who had labelled him as a serial killer, though his eyes said otherwise. [ QUINN DAVIES, THE SOLE KILLER SURVIVOR ( ? ) OF THE SIX. ] Though Zero didn’t say any more on the matter and pulled Quinn through the distraction, the disappointment was clear through their grim expression, their mismatched eyes full of raging, dying stars.

Zero stops by a candy store to admire the treats displayed behind the front windows. They plan to purchase them for themself and Quinn, though pause when they hear several cackles nearby. Out of curiosity, they follow after the sounds to see what was entertaining and found themself walking through the alley. They make a turn and gasp at the large, bolded texts on a brick wall before them.

         QUINN DAVIES IS A KILLER WHO NEEDS TO BE KILLED

The words were printed in dark red, done without any care to them, and noticing the small splatters around them, Zero wonders if it was blood that was used instead of paint... Blood. They glance over to find a few teenagers laughing at the corner, their limbs covered with the red, red, red. One of four, supposedly the leader with black hair and brown eyes, him being the most insensitive to the others ( Four is his name now ), mentions about how he plans to commit a crime, that he will make sure Quinn will be the main suspect of it.

Zero’s eyes glow as they realize something.

“...You,” they snarl, approaching closer to the group, their glitches hissing and snapping at the reality.

“YO- YOU - YOU BLOODY. FUCKED UP. P̵I̵G̴S̴.”

Zero remembers. Quinn’s day of graduation. Once he took the diploma while everyone was out with their own already, and a small celebration was done with icecreams and milkshakes, Zero was with Quinn and his father as they returned home. He opened the front door and Zero saw red. Saw Quinn covered in blood—pig’s blood. His father rushed over and tried comfort him as he remained still, his eyes widen and diploma dropped to the blood stained floor. Zero didn’t know what happened from there when they exited their home to find out who was responsible for it. Their powers couldn’t work so they spent the rest of the evening alone with just their human abilities searching for answers. 

In the end, Zero only learnt that the incident was recorded and already uploaded across the social medias.

“And who the Hell are YOU?!”

Zero’s attention snaps back to the present to find the blonde haired kid ( Three ) taking a threatening step forward.

“I recognize him,” comments the other ( Two ) with the brown hair. “He’s with Quinn and his pussy of a dad. He was in the video as well.”

“Shit, I didn’t even notice him!” says the last kid ( One ). “Wait, Quinn has another dad?! Didn’t he have a mom?”

“He did until she abandoned him because she couldn’t bear the fact her own child is a mass murderer,” sneers Two. “Anyways, I’m not surprised his dad would fuck with guys too. Quinn gives me that f—” Zero T E A R S his jaw off from him, watches with a blank stare as blood explodes and coats on them and their surrounding. Two gags and gurgles as he collapses to the surface and tries to breathe for life, his hands trying to cover their jawless face, though can only bear so much of his blood before his body stills.

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT, SHAWN! WHAT THE - WHAT THE FUCK!?” screams Three, taking his gun out to shoot at Zero. The bullets enter through their stomach and as the aches tear across them, they fall to their knees. In the corner of their eyes, they watch One and Four leave the area before they realize Three have the gun against their forehead.

Zero takes his hand and bites his wrist hard enough to take a chunk of raw meat from him. Three screams as he pulls the trigger, another bullet hitting to the sky. Violent rings echo at the back of their mind and they freeze for a brief moment before they shove more of his hand into his mouth, constantly chewing through the flesh. Three tries to take the gun with his free hand, though Zero grabs his other wrist and SNAPS it.

“FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!” He drops his gun and finally steps away from them, wailing from the agony. Before he can look up from his damaged hands, he falls to the ground with a bullet through the eyeball before the gun is shoved through the other socket.

“DO YOU THINK MARK GOT HIM!?” shouts One as he and Four finds the exit entrance of the alley.

“I DON’T FUCKING KNOW, JUST RUN!” responds Four, pushing him on the back.

One trips his feet over and falls, crying out from their knees and arms got scrapped against the concrete surface. He watches One’s form disappearing as he takes a turn. “FUCK, LUKE!” he loudly hisses, trying to pull himself up. “LU-” Two knifes pierce his mouth and his eyes roll back, dead.

Four reaches to the exit, he tries to call out for help from the people passing by. Hearing no one, his blood runs cold realizing they are frozen, stuck in time. He tries to make a run, though only to find Zero standing before him, giggling madly with two knifes held out, his right weapon holding the head of One. There is nothing human about them while they are coated in red, red, red, though the worst thing about them? They’re wearing a human face.

Four’s face.

Luke gags and covers his mouth. He runs to the opposite direction, though nearly bumps into Zero. He trips and falls on his back, whimpering and wheezing. “WHA - WHAT - WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?” he yells, his hands shoved into the pockets before he throws whatever he have at Zero. Wallet, drugs, everything. Yet nothing seems to attract Zero as they stomp on his crotch and rest their entire weight there. Luke wails and tries to push them off of him, though Zero stops him by throwing One’s head on him. Luke screams, pushing it away and violently shakes his head before he constantly begs to Zero to let him be alive.

Zero’s head perks up at the pleas. “You - you want to - YOU want to be ALIVE?” they innocently ask, quirking an eyebrow at him. “Well, I - i - IIIIII want you and your boys to leave - to leave Quinn Davies, my best fucking friend, al- alo- ALONE.”

“Thank you, but nah. They gotta have someone to blame, I guess," said Quinn to Zero a while after one of the teenagers— Luke pushed him down and insulted him right before Zero’s eyes. It was the first time they witnessed something like this to Quinn and before they could do anything, Quinn stormed off, leaving them behind and Luke walking away, laughing, laughing, laugh—

Zero grabs Luke’s neck, keeps him there as he squirms, his nails digging through their bleeding arms, before his body begins to twi- twi- twitch. “Here’s the deal: I’ll keep - I’ll keep you alive. I’ll resurrect your friends too. ONLY as long as - as looongggg as you all can do T-H-A-T for me, okay?” He clenches his skin tighter and watches the purple forming beneath their fingertips. Luke tries to nod, though seeing the desperation in his eyes, Zero laughs and lets go of him with enough force for his head to hit the ground, knocking him out. “Okay,” says Zero, falling to the surface on their back, their blood still gushing from their stomach wounds.”Okay,” they whisper and weakly snap their fingers.

Darkness falls.

"Four teenagers are taken to the hospital with severe injuries. One of them have a dislocated jaw, another have missing eyes, and the third have a missing tongue with a deep cut around the neck. The fourth, while only having bruises on the neck, keeps rambling on about this entity who had a face like his and lashes out at anyone who tries to come close to him. No one seems to know what happened to them or even who they are. Police had tried contacting their families and close associates with their given phone numbers, though none of them recalls being associated with them. The police are still investigating the case. If you know who any of these teenagers are, please contact at—”

"Zero?”

Zero’s gaze slowly rises, though doesn’t meet the other’s, their attention everywhere and nowhere at once. “Yes?”

“Do you know who they are?”

They glance over to the television, staring at the pixelated images of the four teenagers on the screen. “I - I do not”, they blankly respond, staring down at their alphabet cereals and starts playing with them again. They can sense the suspicion, though they don’t know why. Can’t remember if there’s any reason for there to be suspicion.

“Do you?” Zero asks quietly after a heavy period of silence, almost if they’re afraid of the answer.

“No, I can’t remember them,” replies Quinn.

[angstyaches]

The Demon You Know

CW: repressed childhood memories, childhood trauma, drowning, detachment, child with depression (?), anxiety, nausea, pain, angst.

It gets a little abstract because my brain’s been in a funny place lately. Hopefully it makes sense, but if it’s not clear, pleeease tell me. 

Swallow the World: The Ouija Board Pt.11

The headache came on so suddenly that he knew it must have been Rin arriving at the house, Ouija board in tow. Charlie grunted and hoisted himself up from the sofa, wincing and holding one hand to his temple, one to his stomach, willing it to stay settled through the pain. His dad had made pancakes for dinner before he and Charlie’s mum had taken off again for the new house, and he had no desire to see them again, splattered across the coffee table.

Days had passed since Charlie had seen Shayne, and he honestly wasn’t sure that he wanted to anymore. Ingrid and Trevor had returned for a few days, and had seemed determined to keep him occupied with movies and drives and takeaway food. Charlie couldn’t tell if they had sensed he was upset about something, or if they were buttering him up for more bad news. He’d accepted their attention with as much gratitude and as many smiles as he could muster, which was plenty. He was used to making himself appear happy, because it made them happy. And in turn, he felt a little less guilty for being a weight on their marriage, their lives, their plans. He also knew that, soon enough, he’d be as distant from both of them as Jonathan already was from their dad.

Charlie went to open the front door, wondering why he’d heard Rin’s car’s engine stop a few minutes ago, with no sign of her coming to the door.

Rin looked up as she walked from her car to the doorway. Her hair was in two buns, her neck wrapped in a thick scarf. The package under her arm made Charlie want to recoil from the doorway, but he held his ground, trying not to let his panic show on his face as his gaze fell upon a second figure, who was a few steps behind Rin.

He somehow looked worse than the last time Charlie had seen him, and this did nothing to help the sense of dread piling itself onto Charlie’s headache.

“Hi,” Charlie said to Rin, reaching out an arm for a hug as she approached, holding the package out to the side so it wouldn’t touch him. He squeezed his eyes shut, digging his head, maybe a little too harshly, against her shoulder.

“You alright, Charlie Bear?” she whispered.

“Mmhmm, I’m fine, Rin, I just…” He trailed off, words disappearing and leaving only a sour taste on his tongue.

Rin nodded in understanding and tickled at his back.

“How are – how are you?” he asked as he pulled back, standing out of the way so she could come into the hallway.

“Oh, you know,” she sighed. She glanced down at the package under her arm, pulling it out and holding it flat across both her hands. “At least things never stay boring around here for too long, right?”

Charlie hummed in agreement and gestured for her to go through to the front room, where he’d set the coffee table up in the centre of the floor with sofa cushions on either side. She half-smiled at him before carrying the board to the table.

He glanced back towards the driveway. Shayne was hesitating by the steps, like he still hadn’t decided if he was going to come in or not. He looked down and kicked lightly at the gravel with the toe of his boot.

“Waiting for me to –?” Charlie pressed a hand to his head as a spike of pain rippled above his left eye. Well, I’m sorry, but what do you expect? “Waiting for me to invite you over the threshold?”

“I – I was in the forest, and I heard Rin’s car,” Shayne mumbled as he walked past Charlie. “An invite might have been nice –”

“Yeah, except you don’t look at your phone, and you’ve forbidden any of us from coming to your house.”

Shayne scoffed and sat himself next to Rin, eyes glazing over slightly as he watched her starting to set up the board. 

“Come on, Charlie Bear,” Rin called out. “Let’s get started.”

 ___

h-e-l-e-a-v-e-s

Charlie met Rin’s gaze across the table, and she met his. This was the first thing they’d managed to wrangle out of the board since they’d started.

“Was that you?” Rin whispered as the planchet stopped moving beneath their respective fingertips.

“N-no,” Charlie said, cold fear traveling through his bones. He - he certainly hadn’t felt himself directing the little token over those letters. He was still reeling with relief that, after the first three letters, it hadn’t gone on to simply spell the word “hell” as he’d feared for a moment.

“Shayne?” Rin asked.

Shayne gave her a dull look. “Why would I bother?”

Ignoring the remark, Rin looked at Charlie again. “’He leaves’. Does – does it mean you, Charlie? The demon doesn’t want you living here, in this house?”

Charlie slowly shook his head. That didn’t make any sense, did it? Charlie Two had seemingly been with him for a long time, before his parents had bought the Mulberry house.

“It means me.”

Nausea tugged at Charlie’s gut as one finger left the planchet. Shayne let out a huff before getting to his feet.

“Wait, I don’t even know if you can –” Rin drew a deep breath and sighed at having someone leave the board unexpectedly. “Are you sure that’s what it means?”

“Of course.” Shayne winced slightly, his hand almost reaching for his stomach before he stopped it. “Why walk yourself into the shark’s jaw, right?”

“Come on, babe,” Rin chided softly, “don’t take it like that.”

“Like what, Rin? Like I’m a big, black hole that people and demons alike cower away from?”

“Shayne, hang on.” Charlie’s voice was low from the quivering sadness in his chest. He desperately wanted to abandon the Ouija board and go to Shayne, but something in his bones was keeping him from moving. “This whole week, I – I want to just forget about it, okay? Everything you said, and – and what happened with us, I’m – I’m sorry.”

“That’s the problem, Charlie.” Shayne paused and turned in the doorway to the front hall. His hand went towards his stomach again, and he didn’t stop it this time. “Half of you is terrified of me, and the other half is just fucking sorry for me.”

The threat of bursting into tears was too overwhelming by now, and the pain in Charlie’s skull was almost blinding. He was impressed that he’d managed to stay sitting upright this long. He looked down at his lap, coloured spots dancing in his vision. “Alright, then. Go.”

Shayne muttered something that was halfway between a “yeah” and an “mmhmm”. Charlie couldn’t help the sinking feeling in his chest as he heard him leave through the front door.

“Hey,” Rin whispered, squeezing his arm with her free hand. “This is working, Charlie, aren’t you excited?”

“I love him, Rin.”

Her hand dropped away. “I know, Charlie Bear,” she sighed.

Swallowing thickly, Charlie lowered his head and let out a choked sob. It was as though the words had been living in his chest for quite some time, and now that they were out, he was left a little hollow.

“Let’s just get through this. We can chat after, okay? Charlie”

The next time Charlie attempted to blink or lift his head, his muscles resisted him. He wanted to say something, anything, but his lips were - they were so cold, and his lungs couldn’t draw enough air -

“Charlie?” Rin gave Charlie’s arm a shake. 

“The b-b-beach,” Charlie whispered, through it felt like his lips were hanging too far from his mouth, unable to form the words correctly. “Are we at the beach again?”

“The beach?” Rin repeated. “What are you talking about, Charlie Bear? You’re in the Mulberry house with me. Rin.”

Charlie finally completed a single blink, and tears fell from his eyelashes. He couldn’t stop the trembling that travelled down his arms and into his fingertips. He felt like he was about to fall through the floor, only being anchored in place by the finger he had on the planchet. It felt as though he would disappear if he let go.

“M-M-Mum,” he sobbed out suddenly, pain shooting from his head all the way to his heart. “Where’d you – where did everyone go?”

“Charlie, listen to me,” Rin sputtered. “You’re here with me. With Rin?”

Charlie One had known hearts could break. He’d known they could be stolen. Hell, he’d had those things happen to him, so he knew what they should have felt like. But he’d never imagined hearts could be chopped in half and separated like slabs of meat on a butcher’s table.

“Th-th-they don’t w-w-want me,” Charlie stammered. “They never wanted me.”

The pain was physically agonising, yet his body felt too numb to react to it.

“Where did you go?” he mumbled, searching for something inside himself that he couldn’t quite visualise. “Do you not want me anymore either?”

The last thing he heard was Rin’s horrified scream as his eyeballs rolled back in his head, his body swaying in its last seconds of remaining upright, before he collapsed against the floor.

___

Charlie ran barefoot across the sand, leaving tiny footprints behind in the sunshine. The tuneless squawking of seagulls and the rushing of the waves overwhelmed his senses. He didn’t understand it. His cousins loved the beach, and they’d all been giggling and splashing one another in the water, but not Charlie. Charlie didn’t like it. Charlie wanted his mummy. He was breathing calmly because he knew he’d find her. He just needed to find the bright blue screen that they’d set up around their towels and the portable barbeque. It was all here somewhere, a little, temporary oasis of domesticity in the chaos of screaming children and screaming birds.

Finally, there it was. All of the noise and the brightness seemed softer, easier to cope with, once a hug from his mummy was within his sights. He slowed his pace as he got closer, finally able to hear her voice as she chatted happily with her sisters.

“– didn’t want to at the time,” she was saying to his auntie, “but it was my decision to make, Tina. Charlie might be an accident, but ending a baby’s life was just not something I was prepared to do. You have to understand that? I’d never have been able to live with myself, and every day since, I’ve made that same decision over and over again...”

Charlie felt like the sand was going to swallow his feet. He started running again, thinking if he kept moving, it couldn’t take him. He’d just keep moving, never sticking, never ever thinking...

___

Charlie One gasped and blinked, the image of that white face in the dark cave replaced by the same white face in the front room of the Mulberry house. It leaned across the Ouija board, a long, dark digit resting on the planchet. The demon peered down at him as he lay motionless on the floor, deaf and numb to Rin’s desperate attempts to rouse him.

You’re here, he thought.

“Always,” Charlie Two said, and Charlie One detected a smile lingering beyond the unmoving jaw of their skull.

 ___

Charlie ran barefoot across the jagged rocks, not really thinking about where he was going but knowing he didn’t want to turn around. It was like something dark and sticky was chasing him and somehow he knew it wouldn’t follow him into the caverns.

It grew so dark so quickly that he began to slow down, no longer able to see which rocks he needed to step over. When he fell, he didn’t see how far he dropped, or how many sharp rocks he landed on; he just knew that it hurt, and he was gasping too much to cry out for help. Who would even find him in here, anyway? Who would even care, who would want him enough to come and help him?

The ground cut his feet. He knocked his head against rocks jutting out from the cave walls, because he couldn’t see them. Eventually, he turned his head and could no longer see anything but a sliver of sea, a sliver of sky. The cries of the birds and the drone of human activity didn’t reach this place. It was as if he didn’t exist in the same world he’d been in just minutes before.

“Are you okay?”

Fingers reached out in the dark and scared the boy so much that he began to run again. The creature to whom the fingers belonged should have known better, would have if they had been thinking clearer. For they knew of the small plunge pool just ahead, and the small child did not.

Charlie screamed as the ground - painful as it was to run on barefoot - dropped away, and water swallowed him up. He gulped, and he screamed, and he gulped, and it felt as though he’d be screaming and gulping endlessly for the rest of his life, without relief, without end, because who, who would come to save him?

“Stop crying. I’m here now.”

Charlie didn’t know where the air had suddenly come from, but he gasped it gratefully into his lungs, small hands clutching at the thing that anchored him to the rocks, to the world, to himself. He didn’t know where the words floated up from, but he gained control of his wet coughing long enough to ask; “Will you s-stay with me, please?”

The demon embraced the child, too weak to deny such a simple request, so simply asked. “Always.”

[harryskalechips]

Harry Styles and the Reader blurb where Harry creates his Facebook account just for the reader so it's easier to communicate and stuff?

Here it is! enjoy *insert double chin smiley face*

word count 1007

~

“So, You’re leaving tomorrow?”  Y/N pouts as she cuddles with Harry a bit longer. They weren’t dating nor were they best friends but just two people who met each other through a friend. Maybe, something was blooming between them but it was too early to say anything. 

“Yeah.” Harry rests his head against hers as they both watch him scroll through his Instagram. He loves to ghost everyone but little did they know, he was on the app all the time.

“Are we still going to talk to each other or… I just know it’s difficult to communicate long distance.”

“Of course we are. Do you have skype?”

“Yeah.”

“We can use that.”

“How about Facebook?” She sits up a bit and suggests the platform. Thinking about it now, it seemed pretty useful since it was used to post pictures, messages, and video calls. 

“I had to delete my old one when I became famous.” He smirks a bit as she laughs and shakes her head. 

“Why won’t you make one. A private one. You can even use a fake name.” 

“Facebook? Really?” He takes a look at the app on the app store.

“Mhm, my parents use it all the time when my dad was working in Norway.” She looks at his screen too. “Shit, it’s already 9 PM. You gotta go and pack!” He notices the time too so he finally gets off her couch so he can get ready to leave. 

“You’re right ugh. Okay, I’ll make an account and add you. Just your name right?” She nods as she walks him to her front door.

“I’m gonna miss you H. Have fun on tour!” Harry wanted to kiss her so badly and let her know he would miss her more but he stopped himself. It would be a bad idea to confess his feelings now since he’d be gone for 9 months. 

“I promise, I’ll get you tickets for one of my shows.”

“Just make sure you get me them for the one in Paris!” She leans in to give a big hug. 

“Bye, Y/N.”

“Bye!” 

~

Harry was now in his hotel room in Madrid, Spain. It was his third show on tour and although he hasn’t spoken to Y/N in a couple of days, late at night he saw plenty of her. A little secret of his was his guilty pleasure of stalking her Facebook. Pictures from decades ago of her smiling with her friends. Memories and little updates on her timeline made him smile. Was he already this whipped? 

He was laying on his bed on his tummy, just scrolling through her feed when a notification popped up. Y/N L/N is calling.

His eyes freaked since he hasn’t called her on the app before. Making his way to the mirror, he fixed his hair and laid on the bed casually so he could answer Y/N.

“Hey!” Y/N smiles as she observes Harry’s face through her screen. “I saw you online and I kinda missed you so.”

“It’s alright I missed you too. Sorry I haven’t reached out to you in a couple days. I’ve been busy” He lied a bit. Yes, he was busy but most of all, he was shy to text her and call her. 

“It’s okay, how was the show, John Doe.” She jokes and calls him by his fake name.

“It’s good, thank you very much for asking. How’s LA?”

“It’s been lonely without you.” She frowns as she looks out her window. “I think I need to make new friends. I didn’t realize I’ve only been spending time with you these past months.” 

“You regret it?” He teases her as he’s in awe of how pretty she looks. 

“Of course not! You played me all your unreleased songs, how could I!” Harry laughs as he rests his head on the headboard just looking at her. “You alright H?”

“Mhm. Just miss you.” Her face drops a bit. Harry didn’t know that she had a big crush on him too. She just felt a bit sadder than before when she realized he’s going to be all over the place for the next few months. 

“Do you like Facebook? Some nights, I fall down a rabbit hole of just watching videos.”

“I’m enjoying the app a lot.” He smirks as he remembers just stalking her profile not long ago.

“I feel kind of honoured I’m your only friend on the platform.”

“You should be. I won’t be video calling anyone on this account ever.”

“You made the account just for me!” She pretends to be in shock but of course, she knew. She just wanted to flirt with him a bit, she missed his presence. 

“Yeah.” He looks away a bit, “Cause I’m too whipped.”

“What did you say, you spoke a little bit too quiet at the end.” His eyes widened.

“No nothing!” 

“You know we can make these video calls more interesting.”

“How so?”

“We could play games!” “What?” He laughs at her suggestion. “I didn’t even know about Facebook. I thought I was on Friendster.”

“Stop switching the topic. You don’t wanna play games with me?” She pouts as Harry just shakes his head. 

“No, of course, I do!” He watches her pout in amusement. “Okay darling, continue on.” 

“Let me google some first.” He rolls his eyes.

“The originality. I thought you had games made up already!” He smiles as he watches her face flush. 

“No…. Okay here let me read some out.”

“Go for it.”

“20 questions, would you rather, truth or dare.” She shrugs, “These are so basic.”

“What about truth or strip?” Harry jokes but he knew full well he would participate in the game. Y/N’s eyeballs flew out her eyes. 

“Oh okay.”

“What!”

“I’m down for the game. Why Harry? You all talk no bite?” Now it’s her turn to smirk.

“Okay fine let's play.” 

Let’s just say that the video call created a new pathway for them.

[sweetiepie08]

Rebel Z (Chapter 4)

Invader Zim fanfic

While analyzing Zim’s PAK for weaknesses, Tak discovers strange coding that sends her on a search for answers. The clues lead her to uncover a conspiracy that governs all of Irken society. When the truth sends her on the run, she has no choice but to return to the one place the Tallest would never willingly go: Urth.

Meanwhile, Dib has noticed odd changes in Zim’s behavior. Has the invader simply grown bored of his mission over the last few years, or is there something more interesting going on?

People who asked to be tagged: @incorrect-invader-zim , @messinwitheddie, @reblogstupids, @cate-r-gunn, @agentpinerulesall​

If anyone else would like to be added to the tag list feel free to message me. Also, if you’re on the tag list and you changed your name, please just let me know.

Chapter 1. Chapter 2. Chapter 3. Chapter 4. Chapter 5. Chapter 6. Chapter 7. Chapter 8.  Chapter 9. Chapter 10. 

[-]

Dib felt the familiar burning sensation in his eyes as he stared at his monitors. Zim had been relatively quiet for quite some time now, three years to be exact. He didn’t disappear completely, like he had right before the Florpus Hole incident. Dib still caught him moving about his house, talking to strange aliens on his tele-communication device, and building dangerous-looking machinery. Despite Zim’s clear activity, outright plans to take over the Earth seemed to cease. Or at least Zim stopped gloating about them. Dib noticed these changes and decided they were concerning enough to require constant surveillance, but stable enough that he could step away from his screens every now and then.

As his eyes drifted across the screens, they landed on a haphazard stack of college brochures resting on his desk. Top universities from all over the world have been sending him these since preschool. He suspected college recruiters everywhere put his name on their lists the second they heard the world-renowned Professor Membrane had an offspring. They badgered him and Gaz for as long back as he could remember. They typically threw at least one ivy-league brochure in the trash every week. Although now, he had to start keeping them. Those recruiters must have started salivating as soon as his SAT scores were in. Every school wanted to be able to say they educated the children of Professor Membrane.

At least he didn’t have to deal with all the college recruitment events he knew were going on over at the High Skool. He and Gaz left mainstream education behind years ago after convincing their dad to let them homeschool. It wasn’t that hard. All they had to do was sit their dad down and show him their curriculums. His only condition was that they keep their grades up and take the most advanced programs available. It turned out to be a mutually beneficial arrangement. Dib & Gaz were learning the advanced science their father wanted them to, and they never had to set foot in the Skool again. This arrangement ended early for Dib, as he completed his senior year before his former classmates reached midterms. Of course, this only made the college recruiters even more ravenous.

Well, they were going to have to wait. High school may be over for him, but now he was taking a gap year. He told his father he wanted the time to figure out which branch of science he wanted to study. This was only half-true. Really, he just needed to figure out what to do with his life, period.

His child-hood dream of being a paranormal investigator grew less and less appealing as he saw what the field had become. The Swollen Eyeball network had gone down hill since Agent Darkbootie went off the grid to live amongst the sasquatch. Standards dropped to the Marianas Trench. Now, they let in riff-raff like flat-earthers and hollow-mooners. Uncovering the truth didn’t seem important to them anymore. It was all about who could come up with the most convoluted conspiracy, regardless of evidence or even common sense. Dib wanted to uncover the mysteries of the universe, to expand the knowledge of the human race. Knowledge didn’t seem to factor in at all anymore, not so long as the theory was sexy.

As for Dib’s work on Zim, he had to admit, it’d become mundane sometimes. He could only watch Zim binge-watch tv so many times before accepting there was nothing more to it. Hell, sometimes Dib would find himself watching whatever was on the tv more than he watched Zim. He’d sometimes go days without any notable movement. A few weeks ago, however, remarkable activity breathed new life into Dib’s efforts.

Currently, Zim’s ship sat haphazardly parked, or rather crashed, on the front lawn. Dib stared at it, waiting for Zim to notice the state of his space craft.

“Still monitoring Zim?” He heard Gaz say from the door.

“Always,” Dib replied, eyes still glued to the screen.

Gaz rolled her eyes and walked into his room. “You sure you need to? He’s been pretty quiet lately.”

“He knows I’m watching.”

“Okay, TJ Eckleburg,” Gaz said, leaning on his desk and popping open a soda.      

“huh?”

“Read a book.”

“Whatever,” he groaned, his eyes flickering from one monitor to another. “The point is, quietness means nothing. Remember the time he disappeared but it turned out he was just hiding in the toilet?”

“You mean the time you let him hijack Membrane Labs, kidnap dad, and almost send the planet through a florpus hole?” She took a long sip of her soda. “Yeah, I remember.”

“And what about the time he left for weeks, then just showed up one day and broke my camera?”

“Oh yeah, that. I wouldn’t call breaking your camera ultimate evil, though, especially if you were shoving it in his face. You never did find out where he went, did you?”

“No, but there’s definitely something going on now,” Dib said as he opened his laptop. “I was going over the surveillance footage from last night and look.”

He brought up a clip he saved from the footage. It showed Tak parking a boxy, gray ship in Zim’s back yard and sneaking into his base. After a few minutes, the rooftop hanger opened. She flew Zim’s ship out, dumped it on the front lawn, and parked her own ship back in the hanger.

“Is that Tak?” Gaz asked, watching the clip.

“Yeah, I saw her on the cameras a few weeks ago. She broke into Zim’s base and left after about an hour, but this time she hasn’t come out.”

“So why aren’t you going over to investigate?” Gaz asked, returning to her casual lean.

“I can’t just rush in without a plan on something this huge!” he retorted. “I have to figure out what they’re doing first.”

Gaz shrugged. “Maybe she killed him and took over his base.”

“It’s not that easy,” Dib explained. “Zim’s computers are programed to only respond to him.”

“I used it once. The Tak hotdog thing, remember?”

“That was different. Zim let us in semi-willingly. Unless Tak found a way to override the security features…”

“Maybe she’s using Zim’s corpse as a meat-puppet to control the computer.”

Dib cringed. “Uh, gross.” Even he wasn’t sure he could stomach that idea. He returned to his monitors and saw a shadow move in Zim’s living room. “Wait! I just saw something!”

They both leaned into the screen as Dib zoomed in the camera on the window. Through it, they could see Zim’s robot servant sitting on the couch, eating snacks.

“That’s just Zim’s dumb robot watching tv,” Gaz said.

Dib threw his hands up. “Oh come on!” The robot again?! He’d watched this thing gobble down nachos on this couch a million times. Why did everything look so normal over there? “There has to be something going on. Is Tak hiding? Did Zim capture her? Are they planning something together? I have to know!”

“My best guess?”

“You’ve got a theory?” Dib asked, eagerly swiveling his chair around to face her. “Let’s hear it!”

“Tak’s playing the trombone and Zim’s slamming the oven door.” Gaz smirked, looking annoyingly proud of herself.

Dib’s face fell into a scowl. “Thanks Gaz, very insightful.” He sharply turned his chair back toward the monitors.

“You’re going to be up here obsessing all day, aren’t you?” she asked.

“Probably.”

“Fine.” Gaz downed the rest of her drink, tossed the can in the trash, and started toward the door. “I was thinking about watching that new Skinwalker Ranch documentary tonight, but I guess you’ll be busy.”

She walked out, leaving Dib alone with his screens. He scanned the feed in front of him, all inactive save for Zim’s snacking robot. He had been wanting to check out that documentary, but keeping an eye on Zim was more important, especially after this recent development. His eyes landed on the robot again, who was now sloppily sucking down a giant slushee. Dib sighed and checked the rest of his cameras.

Still nothing.

[-]

Zim emerged from his labs after another night of testing and research. His latest project was going well so far, despite the recent interference. No doubt, his leaders would be pleased. He went to the kitchen for a well-deserved soda and, whistling, headed to the living room to check on Gir.

As he sipped, he noticed something large and purple out the window. When he went to look, he nearly spit out his drink. His voot sat crashed in the front yard for all the Urth to see.

“Gir!” he shouted, jumping around to face his robot. “What is my ship doing out there?!”

“I dunno,” Gir said, munching away on his snacks.

“Well, if you didn’t do it, who did?”

“Uh, Zim,” the computer interrupted. “It was probably the intruder.”

“What intruder?!” Zim demanded, stomping into the middle of the room. “Why didn’t you alert me?”

“Uh, I did.”

The show Gir was watching snapped off the tv and the screen now showed security footage from the previous evening. Zim and Gir sat on the couch with a bowl of snacks.

“Sir, I have detected a-”

“Not now, computer,” TV Zim said, “Jessica is about to reveal the murderer.”

“But this really is urgent.”

“Of course!” TV Zim shouted, leaning off the couch. “It was the bus driver, seeking revenge for his fallen offspring!”

“Zim, there is an intruder in the-”

TV Zim jumped to his feet. “What? No!”

“Exactly!”

“It’s not the bus driver after all!” TV Zim declared. “I knew it!”

“No you didn’t,” TV Gir chimed in.

“There’s too much time left in the episode. Jessica still has 15 minutes to find the killer. Now, which of these smelly bus-humans is the real culprit?”

“Ugh, fine, whatever.”

The security feed cut out and Gir’s show came back on the tv. Zim growled and pressed his palms into his forehead. Curse that Jessica Fletcher and her engaging small-town mysteries! If that show hadn’t been canceled Urth decades ago, he would have ensured that was the last murder she ever wrote.

“Computer! Is the intruder still in the base?”

“Yes.”

“Locate them.”

After a few seconds of processing sounds, Computer answered. “Irken biosignature located in the storage room.”

Irken, he was pretty sure he knew what that meant. Zim stormed over to the trashcan/elevator. “Computer, take me to the storage room. I’ll show Tak how to sneak into my base.”

“You’re going to show her how to sneak into your base?”

“Or how not to sneak… Or what happens when you sneak… or… Ugh you know what I meant!” Zim jumped into the elevator. “Just take me there!”

[-]

Finding Tak wasn’t as hard as he expected. As soon as he made it down to the storage room, Zim was greeted by the sound of something metal clanging to the floor. From there, all he had to do was follow the trail of crushed cans. At the end, he found Tak sitting on the floor, surrounded by discarded cans and bottles. She barely took notice of him as she downed another drink.

“You!” He shouted, pointing an accusing finger at her. “You have some nerve coming back here after… whatever it is you did! I spent days running diagnostics, trying to figure out what it is you tampered with.”

“Eh, who cares what I did?” Tak slurred, tearing her mouth away from the bottle. “I’m back on Urth. Life is empty and destiny is a cruel joke.”

“What are you going on about? And what is all this?” he said, trudging through her mess. His foot kicked a glass bottle which was larger than the rest. Picking it up, he recognized the fancy Irken label. “This is my gingzor!” he gasped. “I’ve been saving this!”

“You can get more,” Tak said with a burp. “Did you know you can get this stuff on Urth without showing identification? Idiots.”

“Have you been in my storage room, drowning yourself in gingzor all night?”

“Yup, why not? As good a way to waste my meaningless life as any.” She looked down the neck of the bottle in her hand. “Empty, sad,” she pouted as she tossed it over her shoulder.

“What are you talking about?”

“Just my recent discovery that my entire life is a lie,” she sighed. “Hey, wanna watch me laser-shot this whole six pack?”

Tak held up a pack of green cans by their plastic connector. She shot a hole in the bottom of one with a laser pistol, then started chugging the drink out from the bottom.

Zim curled a finger around his chin as he pondered the sight before him. This was very unlike Tak. He’d had enough encounters with her to know what to expect. Proud declarations of her superiority, vows for bloody vengeance, maybe a bit of maniacal cackling… that was Tak. She even had all night to attempt to kill him and, instead, spent it swimming in a pool of gingzor and self-pity. This…this was not Tak. He wondered what could possibly bring her to such a lowly state. Then it hit him.

“Ah, I see what’s happened,” he declared. “You finally realized you were never meant to be an invader and that knowledge has sent you down a spiraling pit of despair. Go on, let it out. Zim can offer his pity.”

Tak’s eyes narrowed. She plucked a can off of the pack, shook it up, and sprayed it in Zim’s face. Zim let out a yelp as he was doused in the drink.

“You know, Zim, I didn’t know you were so sentimental.”

“Sentimental?” he grumbled, rubbing the gingzor out of his eyes

“I found your secret stash.” Tak smirked as she pulled out a box labeled ZIM’S PRIVATE STUFF (GIR DON’T TOUCH).  She reached into the box and took out a CD case titled Best of Queen. “Looks like someone’s a fan of Urth royalty,” she said as she tossed it in the air.

Zim scrambled to catch it before it smashed on the ground. “That is a music group, not royalty and-”

“Oh what’s this?” she asked, pulling out his sleeved blanket. “Some sort of backward robe?” She threw that on Zim’s head, then held up his fuzzy boots. “And what are these?”

Zim snatched the blanket off and dropped it on the ground. “It gets very cold on Urth and-”

“Guess I can expect softness from someone who kept their cadet badge.” Tak held up the pink, metal circle with the Irken insignia emblazed on it. His heart beat just a second faster.

“Enough!” he shouted, swiping the badge out of her hands. “You have no business going through my stuff!”

Tak made a dismissive sound and waved her arm. “Pfft, I’ve already seen the inside of your brain. What’s the harm in looking through a few boxes?”

“Eh? My brain? Wha?” His hands flew to his back as he realized what she just admitted. “My PAK! You tampered with my PAK!”

“For the last time, I didn’t tamper, I ANALYZED!” she screamed in his face.

“Uh… this was the first time I mentioned it… Wait! It doesn’t matter! You committed a capital offence!”

“No, tampering is a capitol offence. Analyzing isn’t technically against the law.” She let out a bitter chuckle. “Although, it probably should be if they didn’t want me to see what I saw.”

“Eh? What?”

“I know something you don’t know…” she sing-songed.

“What? What is it?” He demanded, grabbing her by the shirt. “Tell me!”

“Guess who’s defective…” she sing-songed again in that annoying, giddy tone. “You! And me! And Skoodge! And a whole bunch of other people probably! And it doesn't matter at all!” She laughed. “Nothing matters! Nothing is real!” She laughed harder and threw her arm around Zim’s shoulders. “I don't even want to kill you anymore because it be so pointless. Why put in the effort? We're just walking talking food for a giant, horrible, tentacle-y, blob-monster-god-thing”

“What blob-monster-god-thing?” He inquired, pealing Tak’s arm off of himself with a sneer.  

“You know it as the control brains.” She smirked. There was something bitter and smug in it.

“Control brains?” He gasped. “You're speaking treason.”

“Eah-yup!” she declared, popping open another drink.

He desperately rubbed his temples as this new information buzzed around in his brain. She couldn’t be serious. She couldn’t be. “This is a trick,” he accused, eyes darting around, looking for hidden cameras. “You're trying to get me to say something treasonous so you can record it and show it to the Tallest.”

“Nope, no trick,” she said. Her voice was unsettlingly casual. “I went all the way to Refierencee to find out Irk is nothing but the plaything of a life sucking horror blob. Don't believe me? Here.” She tapped a spot on her PAK and a cable flew into her hands. “Plug me in and check my memory drive. See if I'm lying.”

She waggled the cable at him, daring him to take it. There had to be a reason she was doing all this. She must have some sort of ulterior motive. Why else would she make up such an outlandish lie? Unless, it wasn’t a lie...

“Fine,” he said, snatching the cable, “but I warn you, I've upgraded my computer security. So if you try to infect my base with a virus, it won't work.”

Tak shrugged and went back to her drink.

Something was wrong here, very wrong. Whether it was the truth or just a nefarious plot, there was only one way to get to the bottom of it.

[-]

Tak sat on a box, her PAK plugged into the computer while Zim reviewed her memory drive on his computer screen. He played the Refirencee memories again. Was this the 3rd or 4th time? He couldn't remember. He scanned each frame with a sharp eye. There had to be something else here, some sort of tell that this was a trick, just another one of Tak’s schemes. There was no way this could be true.

“Watch as many times as you want,” Tak said, opening yet another can. “It's not gonna change.”

“You tampered with your memory drive,” Zim said matter-of-fact. Even if he hadn’t found an inconsistency yet, that had to be the case. It was the only explanation. Well, not the only one…

“Nope,” she answered. The assurance in her voice was grating. “Have your computer check. I dare you.”

Zim glanced up. “Computer…”

“No signs of tampering detected.”

“You see…” She was so smug. He hated it.

“Then this Krislotch person is a liar.”

“And has an amazing amount of free time on his hands,” Tak retorted.

“There must be something else!” Zim slammed his hands on the control panel. “Some other explanation! If it is true that means-”

“That our people are slaves and our entire society is a lie? Why do you think I keep drinking?” She asked, knocking her drink back.

“Enough sass, you talking bottle of gingzor!” He shouted, whirling his chair around to face her. He jumped to his feet and put an accusing finger in her face. “You expect me to believe this? That the Control Brains are actually-”

“A giant parasite feeding off the life force of our entire race? Yes! Exactly! What aren't you getting?” She jumped to her feet as well and advanced toward him, crushing a can in her hands. “It's got its tentacles in everything. It controls every aspect of our lives and it'll continue to grow bigger and bigger until that's all there is. Irk doesn't exist, Zim!” She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in. “In our lifetime it never has! There is only it and everyone: the invaders, the foot soldiers, the janitors, the food service drones, even the tallest! We're all just slaves to the glory of the parasite.”

Tak broke out in a wild cackle as tears began leaking from her eyes. Her fingers slipped from Zim’s clothes and she doubled over, hysterical laughter echoing around the room. Zim could only watch and puzzle over her conduct. This behavior was unbecoming of a proper Irken, especially not an elite as Tak fancied herself. Maniacal laughter was fine, sure, but this? Would she degrade herself so much for an act? He thought not.

“What now?”

“It's just so funny,” she said, wiping a tear from her eye. “I mean, we work all our lives to serve the empire. You and I even remained loyal in exile. And when I learned about this thing, how our people were in danger, my first thought was ‘I have to stop this thing.’ And now,” she let out a burst of cackling, “I'm an enemy of the state! And I have to hide in your base of all places and the first person I can tell about any of this is you.” Her laughter began again in full and it sent her to the floor. “You see how that's funny?”

“Uh, no.”

“Oh.” She calmed down enough to take a few deep breaths. “Am I laughing or crying?”

“Uh, laughing I think?”

“Good, good, 'cause this really is funny,” she said, reaching over and grabbing another can. “Like a great, big joke. My life, my existence… it's all a big, cosmic… what's that human phrase? Fuck you!” Her arms opened to the ceiling. “It's a big, cosmic fuck you!”

Zim watched her, laying on the floor, her pained laughter filling the room. The site was beyond pathetic, but he could feel no victory in it. He couldn't feel anything at all. If this was true, Tak was right… about everything. And in the face of this revelation, he did the only thing he could do. He sat down on the floor, grabbed a can of gingzor from the pack, and poured the contents into his mouth.

[kyndaris]

Suddenly Thirteen

When I was younger, one of my favourite films starred Jennifer Garner acting like a teenager who was pretending to be thirty. In high school, all I wanted to do was grow out of the phase of terrible acne and finally be able to get my driver’s licence. I had a thousand dreams. Each one more fantastic than the next. One day I would want to be an actuary, a researcher or an astronaut.

Fast forward a decade and a half, and I was still single, stuck in a job that I hate with a passion with no long-term career prospects as well as up to my eyeballs in debt. When had my life gone off the rails? Where had all the hopes and dreams flitted away to?

I glanced at the time down in the bottom right of the screen. It was two in the morning on a worknight and the only thing I could bring myself to do was scroll through Facebook, bitter and miserable. A glass of shiraz rested on my bedside table. It probably wasn’t a good idea but I needed some comfort after my explosive break-up with the man I had been dating for the last three months.

So, of course it seemed the perfect time to trawl through all the positivity that I could never have. A photo of a mouth-watering dinner from an acquaintance in the grade below me. Another Dungeons and Dragons post from old primary school friends that I had drifted away from over the years because life had felt it necessary to get in the way.

I was full of regrets and I had just barely hit thirty. A deadlier combination I knew not as I morosely pondered what could have been.

It was roughly two thirty in the morning before I closed my laptop and settled into bed. I knew it was a bad idea. Going to bed drunk and at so late an hour. Work would be hell when I woke up. The hangover would only serve to dampen whatever enthusiasm I had that it was a Friday. Maybe, though, I would be able to get away with calling in sick.

There was always a first time for everything.

My eyes had barely closed when my alarm sounded – loud and incessant – in my ear. Telling me that I needed to get out of bed if I wanted to arrive at work on time. Groggily, I reached for my phone on my bedside table, hoping to hit snooze. It wasn’t there. Frowning, I sat up and looked around my room.

Was it me or did it seem smaller? And had my bed been moved to the side?

Before I could make sense of what was happening, my door slammed open. Standing in the frame was a man that I had not seen for many years.

“Come on, Sharon, let’s get a decent breakfast in you. Don’t want to be late and starving for your first day at high school.”

This couldn’t be. I had to still be dreaming. Or perhaps my drink had been spiked. I pinched myself. Hard.

Pain lanced up my arm and I knew that this was no fever dream. Oh God. What was happening?

Sensing something was wrong, dad approached me. “What’s wrong, sweetie?”

“This isn’t right,” I blurted. “Am I still dreaming?”

Dad frowned at my response and crouched down next to me. “I know high school can be frightening. You’re going somewhere new. But it’s also exciting. Think of all the friends you’ll make and the things you’ll learn! Now, I’ll see to the waffles. Don’t want them to burn. Come out when you’ve changed, all right, sweetie?”

I sat in silence for several minutes, trying to wrap my head around everything. Dad was here. And alive. A sharp stab of longing pierced my chest. Even if I was still asleep and dreaming, I didn’t want to waste the opportunity of seeing him again.

Hastily, I climbed out of bed and padded over to the wardrobe. My old uniform sat neatly folded on the dresser. Within a minute, I had zipped up the skirt and buttoned up the crisp white shirt.

It was time to brush my teeth, wash my face and go down for breakfast.

Catching my reflection in the bathroom mirror, it took a few heartbeats for me to understand that I had been blasted back to when I was thirteen. No longer was my hair platinum blonde. Instead, it was the original muddy brown of my youth. My teeth were in disarray and my face was covered in freckles.

I shuddered at the thought of going through puberty again.

This wasn’t a dream. It was a nightmare.

Dad called my name again as I was just finishing up my ablutions. After taking one last look at my younger self in the mirror, I dashed down the stairs.

“Well, isn’t someone a little more chipper now?”

I didn’t say a word as I plonked down at the breakfast table. Dad was true to his word. Waffles, drizzled in maple syrup, sat before me. All of it seemed so surreal. I grabbed up fork and knife and began to eat in earnest, savouring each bite, even as I told myself that none of this was real. It couldn’t be.

Within minutes, I was finished. By 7.30, my bag was packed and I was in the car, waiting to be driven to the nearest bus stop.

A part of me was nervous as we drove down the familiar streets of my childhood. It had been years since I moved and I had never looked back. Yet, sitting in the car with my dad, I was reminded of all the wonderful moments I had shared.

Before I knew it, we arrived at the station. Dad came with me, looking as proud as ever, as we both waited for the bus. There were other children as well. Many that I recognised. To my right was Blake Johnson, short and skinny. In a few years, he would go through a growth spurt that would have him towering over even the teachers.

Seated on the bench, with her mum, was Floris Yu. She had on a thick pair of glasses and she had her hair tied up in twin pigtails. It was hard to believe that by the time we were all in university, she would have slept with half the boys in the grade.

It was nearly eight when the school bus finally pulled up.

“God, sometimes I wonder where the years went. You’re a big girl now, Sharon. Have a good day at school. Mum will be here to pick you up. But you’ll have to tell me everything that happens on your first day, all right?” Dad said as I was just about to board, tears in his eyes.

I hugged him tight, relishing his warmth. “Be careful on the roads, dad.”

“I will, sweetie. Now, go on.”

Taking an empty seat near the back of the bus, I pressed myself up against the window and waved desperately at him. Dad smiled and waved back. As the bus began to move and turn around the corner, dad stood there, as if imprinting this moment in his memory.

--

The first day passed by in a blur. I met my teachers as well as my future friends. Despite the fact that Olivia was now back to her awkward twelve-year old self, we clicked just as easily as the first time. Danielle was as chatty as I remembered her. Oliver, on the other hand, seemed lost and a little preoccupied. I wasn’t sure what was bothering him. Had never really paid it much attention because by the time we became fast friends in Year 9, he had got over that bump in his life.

Mum greeted me when I got off the bus. Before I could do or say anything, she grabbed hold of my schoolbag and slung it over one shoulder. “So, how was your first day? Make a lot of new friends?”

Smiling, I answered her. We talked until we reached the car and then we talked even as mum drove us back home.

I was still regaling mum with tales of my adventures as we walked through the front door and the phone in the kitchen rang. Mum went to pick it up. Her face went through an entire gamut of emotions. A feeling of dread welled up through me. Oh God, how could I have forgotten?

Gingerly, mum placed the phone back down. As if frightened it was going to turn around and bite her. She looked at me, eyes wide and her face as pale as death.

“What’s wrong?” I asked even as I cursed myself for being a fool. Caught up in living the fantasy that I found myself in, I had wiped away all traces of Patrick and his failing health.

“We need to go to the hospital.”

Without even changing out of my uniform, I clambered into the driver’s seat, adjusting it for my considerably shorter legs. Mum stared at me, lost for words when I asked for the keys. How could she just stand there when Patrick was on life support and awaiting the final decision to euthanise him?

“Come on. We need to go, mum. Now. I’m the better driver. Just throw on Google Maps on your phone and direct me.”

“Sharon, you’re thirteen. And what’s Google Maps?”

Cursing under my breath, I realised my error. It was supposed to be a dream, but it was damn near too realistic for my liking. “Forget it mum. I’m sorry,” I said as I climbed into the passenger’s seat. “Let’s just get going. Patrick needs us.”

Mum nodded mutely and got in the car. She turned on the ignition and effortlessly put the car into gear. I knew she had questions. But she had the wisdom to set them aside and concentrate on more immediate needs.

Within ten minutes, we turned into the driveway of the veterinary hospital. I hopped out of the car as soon as we came to a stop, unbuckling the seatbelt and flinging open the door. Mum shouted after me but I ignored her as I raced to the open doors where dad was standing.

“How’s Patrick doing?” I asked.

Dad shook his head. “He’s having trouble breathing. Doc says he’s on his last legs. We’d better hurry in.”

I pushed past him. My feet took me down the familiar corridors until I reached the operating room. Looking through the circular window, I spotted Leanne. She was easily recognisable. Despite the gown she wore, I could identify her blonde streaks that had been tied into a neat bun.

Lying still on the table was Patrick. He was my first dog. A golden retriever that had been my protector and friend for as long as I could remember.

Was he already gone? But then, his chest rose. Within seconds I was by his side, holding his face in my hands. Perhaps he sensed me there for his tongue came out to give me an affectionate lick.

“You’re going to be fine, Patrick.” I didn’t know if I was saying this to him or merely to console myself after witnessing the same event twice. It wasn’t fair.

A hand came to rest on my shoulder. It gave me a comforting squeeze. “I’m so sorry, Sharon.” Dad. It had to be.

I gently patted Patrick’s muzzle and gave him one last forlorn look before I sought the shelter of dad’s embrace.

“Why did it have to be him?” I said into his chest as we were gently ushered out. A part of me resented the fact that I couldn’t be there when Patrick took his last breath. Only Leanne bearing witness to his last moments. But she was the vet. And it was her job to see it through.

--

We arrived home, sad and despondent. The last few hours had stained the days in hues of grey. Dinner was a quiet affair. I went to bed early, unable to shake off the loss I felt, though I should have remembered it all having experienced it before. Somewhere over the years, the pain had healed. Now, the wound had torn open again.

If mum had allowed me, I would have preferred going to sleep with a glass of rum. Unfortunately, my mum had always been a stickler for rules and in this dream of mine, I was underage.

Oblivion was difficult to find. After tossing for what felt like hours, I fell into a fitful slumber – unsure of what the next day would bring and hoping that I would wake up in my proper time, where things made sense and the pain that felt so raw now was only a distant memory.

But when I blearily opened my eyes, I found myself again in my old childhood bedroom. Instead of tastefully selected paintings, there were a myriad of posters. Most of them featuring Disney Princesses. A part of me wanted to scream. The more adult part felt deflated – resigned to the fact that I was trapped in the wrong time period and forced to relive my teenage years.

I wasn’t sure why that was the case. More than likely, it was some cosmic joke.

Dad came in with a tray topped up with breakfast around seven. “I know yesterday was difficult, Sharon. It was hard for me as well. Patrick was with us for so long. But you need to eat. And when you’re finished, let’s have a talk. I can call up the school. Get you the rest of the week off.”

His offer was tempting. And in my previous past, I had taken him up on the offer. But this was supposed to be a dream. Or, at least, I believed it was. Curiosity got the better of me. I wanted to see where such a choice would lead me as I already knew the alternative: bound to the bed for six days and moping around the house. It had meant playing catch-up when everyone else had picked the friendships that would last for more than a decade.

It was with great effort that I pulled myself from the warmth and comfort of my covers and slipped once again into my school uniform. Though I had experienced the death of Patrick before, the pain of his loss was still as visceral as ever.

Dad understood that when I gave him my bravest smile and said, “I can do this. Patrick wouldn’t have wanted me to be crying my eyes out all day anyways. Just because I’m at school doesn’t mean I won’t miss him.”

“That’s the spirit.”

It was a near thing, but I managed to scoff down breakfast, get dressed, pack my bag and arrive at the station just as the school bus trundled up. I got on, determined to have a good day at school. Even though I might have appeared as if I was just thirteen, I knew that in my head I was a grown woman that had already gone through a whole host of experiences.

With time, I knew, that the pain of losing Patrick all over again would dull. It was simply a matter of putting on a strong façade for the rest of the day.

The second day of school went by as quickly as the first. Before I knew it, the final bell had rung and I was on the bus back home. For a short while, as I was relearning the names of my teachers, I could forget that I was trapped in a different time and that my loyal dog that I had known all my life had passed away the day before.

Never before had I thought high school as a place to forget my woes. My memories of the teenage years had been filled with confusion and angst and worries about the changes my body was going through. Coupled with the pressure to perform and the mountain of homework that I always left to the last minute, it seemed like a miracle when I finally graduated.

Yet, here I was, putting aside the grief and pain as I socialised with the teenager versions of some of my oldest friends. It was striking how far we had come. From precocious students who dreamed of the world to weary adults, caught in the grind of the corporate machine even as we hid our misery by posting edited photos on Instagram and Facebook.

When I walked home from the bus stop later in the afternoon, I felt better than I would have thought given the recent death of Patrick. Rather than desiring to curl up into a foetal ball, I was filled with the determination to change my future.

It was to these thoughts that I fell asleep, after having completed my homework. For close to an hour, I had tried to figure out the maths equations that had never had any bearing in my position as a slave to capitalism.

--

Rays of sunlight peeked through my window when I jolted out of bed. I glanced towards the alarm clock, hoping to glean the time, but it was missing. Instead, an iPhone sat in its place and it was ringing shrilly. I picked it up. The time read 7:30AM.

Still muddled by sleep, I had just shimmied out of my pyjamas when I realised that things were not quite right. Back in high school, I didn’t have a smart phone. It would still be another year or so before Steve Jobs would announce his creation to the world at the Macworld convention. And it wasn’t until my first year at university that I had acquired my first Samsung S2. Purchased, of course, with my own money earned from a part-time job.

Nor had dad come in to check if something was wrong.

Looking at my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I confirmed my suspicions. Thirty-year old Sharon stared back at me. Hair, dyed blonde at the tips with dark roots threatening to undo all my good work. I was back in my time. The strange dream that had held me hostage had ended.

A part of me felt bereft. The halcyon days of my youth were gone. A second time.

I let out a frustrated breath and checked the time and date on my smart phone again. Now was not the time of reminiscing over what could have been. I had an hour to shower, get dressed and head to work. Another day in the cubicle, earning the money I needed to survive in a cold and unfeeling world.

God. I needed a coffee. And I needed it yesterday.

--

The day passed as slowly as a snail. By eleven, I was jittery, wishing for the day to end. My earlier musings of what to have to lunch replaced by the monotonous repetition of office busywork. Jenny, one of my work colleagues, seemed to sense my mercurial mood.

“What’s up, Sharon? You don’t seem to be blazing through your cases as quickly as you usually do after your banana bread and skim latte combo.”

“Just got a lot of things on my mind, Jenny.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” I said as I opened up another spreadsheet that reduced a person’s life into a series of indecipherable numbers.

She took the hint and kept quiet until lunch time finally rolled around. And before she could invite me out for a walk and offer to shout me some sushi from the restaurant down the street, I was already out of my seat, headed for the elevators. Luck smiled upon me and I managed to get into one of the death traps on my lonesome. But despite the myriad of choices for lunch along the street where my work was situated, I didn’t feel hungry. Instead, I simply let my feet lead me through the labyrinth of streets in the bustling central business district of the city – searching for something I could not quite name.

I returned, five minutes after the prescribed end of lunch. Jenny looked up from her desk, eyebrows arched into a question that I purposely ignored.

As soon as the time on the bottom right of the computer screen hit 5PM, my bag was packed and I was in the first available lift.

Within thirty minutes, I walked through my front door. The keys went to their usual tray, my bag landed precariously on the dining room table and I plonked myself on the sofa. Hunger had my stomach growling but I could not bring myself to start preparing dinner. Exhaustion tugged at every limb, despite the fact that I had done little in physical exertion. It was easier to just let the lid of my eyes close and allow my mind to drift.

When next I woke, morning light was shining through the blinds. Groaning, I sat up and stretched – trying to rid myself of the kinks. Having missed lunch and dinner the day before, I was starving. Still half-asleep, I went to my bag to fetch my phone and take a gander at the time.

But no matter my efforts, the screen remained black. Shit. After what felt like ten minutes, I managed to find my charger. At the very least, today was a Saturday and I had no plans beyond a property inspection. If I was lucky, I could squeeze in some time to finish the detailing on my next costume for the convention next month.

The day went quickly, even though I lounged around the apartment for most of the day. A quick jaunt onto Facebook only helped further my apathy as I scrolled through posts filled with fun and laughter. In my head, I knew that many of the pictures I saw were curated. Did I not do the same when I tried out a new café? The image of who I was on the internet was never quite the perfect representation of who I was in reality.

By 8 in the evening, I was ready to slink back into bed. Just as I was about to shut my laptop, Facebook Messenger popped up with an alert. Curiosity won out and I clicked it open without first glancing at the name.

Hey! How’s it going? I know it’s been a few years, but damn, how’s life treating you?

My gaze drifted to the profile picture in the upper left corner and the name emblazoned in bold white letters. Simon Lau. After we had gone to different universities, studying distinctly different degrees – he had studied medicine, whereas I had wasted most of my loan on a diploma in business – it came as a bit of a shock.

Hi Simon. Life’s been good for the most part. What about you? From the pictures and posts I’ve seen it seems as if you’ve been keeping busy.

Yeah. It’s been hectic. Finally managed to get tenure at my local hospital. Being a doctor isn’t easy. The hours are long and the pay is pretty lousy.

Well, I do believe congratulations are in order. Becoming a doctor is no small feat.

What about you?

I stared at the words, wondering how much of my life to reveal. When I compared myself to the achievements of many of my other friends, it felt like I had done little. An anime and boardgame fanatic with a flair for the dramatic.

I’ve hardly achieved anything of note.

That can’t be true. The Sharon I knew in school was a powerhouse. Sure, you might not have gotten the best grades, but I’m sure that you would have achieved anything you set your mind to. In fact, I’m kind of envious of the cosplay photos you’ve been putting up.

A smile broke across my lips. I had missed the conversations I used to have with Simon. We had met in fifth grade, as part of a gifted and talented initiative held by our school. From the moment he had shyly introduced himself one recess early in Term 2, we became inseparable as we poured over our love for Neopets and Little Figher 2.

Somehow, we chatted until midnight as we reminisced over the old days. Before I logged off for some much-needed rest, we exchanged mobile numbers and set up a meeting point for the convention that would be in town for the long weekend.

I fell asleep, grinning from ear to ear.

Within moments, I was rudely awoken by my alarm clock. With a groan, I sat up in bed and reached one hand to shut it down. As I yawned and blearily looked around my room, I was shocked to find myself once again in my old childhood home. I was back in the past again, reliving my time during high school.

--

For months, I lived two lives. One in the past, and one in my current time. Just like the first time I had ventured into my high school days, I was able to change small elements and make better decisions. When Floris came to me, dishevelled and shaking from an encounter she did not want to talk about, I was able to offer her a shoulder to cry on rather than be consumed by my own selfish problems.

It made me understand her a little more and see why her path so swiftly diverged from mine back in Year 8. In my present, there were also slight differences. As if somehow my actions were like the beating of a butterfly’s wings. Or perhaps I was simply seeing through different eyes. After all, having the ability to go back in time and make changes for the better seemed farfetched and I still wasn’t entirely convinced that I was having incredibly lucid dreams.

But what mattered during the second chance I was given were the moments I spent with dad, as well as being able to see my classmates in a different light.

All of that changed, however, as I was wrapping up work and my phone buzzed. I was back in the present again, after enjoying two weeks of school holidays where I had messaged Simon almost every single day. Frowning, I glanced down at the caller id that was flashing on my screen. It read ‘Beau.’ For a moment, I was confused. Only a few days ago, I had been scrolling through Tindr as the sole occupant of my apartment. My rooms had been a mess. Every spare surface covered in various pieces of fabric in a desperate bid to complete my costume before the upcoming event.

After all, I was going as my favourite character from a popular video game franchise.

Curiosity won the best of me. I accepted the call and was surprised by the voice I heard on the other end.

“Good evening, milady. Did you have a good day in the office?” asked Simon Lau. “I’ll be home around six and can come over to help for the last stretch. That okay with you?”

I was at a loss for words. Was Simon my boyfriend? It didn’t seem quite real. Yet, as I searched through my memories, new ones overlaid the old. After dancing around each other all throughout high school, we officially entered into a relationship during first year of uni. And though we had the occasional fight here and there, there had only been one instance when I had seriously considered of breaking up with him.

Simon was my second half. He knew me inside and out. Just as I did him.

“—Earth to Sharon. Are you still there?”

A smile slowly curled the tips of my lips upward. “Sorry. Just remembering how lucky I’ve been to have you by my side.”

“Of course. I wake up every day grateful I can see a handsome doctor with impeccable musculature in the mirror each day.”

“Narcissist.”

He chuckled. “Hey, you’re the one that brought it up in the first place.”

“I only said that I love having you by my side. Looking back, it almost seems predetermined,” I said. A giddy moment passed before a faint memory flitted across my mind that left me feeling hollowed out. “Sometimes I wonder what might have happened if things had gone differently. The thought chills me to the core.”

“There’s nothing to fear, Sharon. I’ll be back over before you know it. Just wrapping up the last of my shift,” said Simon, seemingly to sense my doubts and wanting to allay them. He was wasted as a doctor in the local hospital. But it was his passion to help and render assistance to those that needed it the most. And who was I to stand in the way of his desire when it was the thing that drew me to him? “Can you hold on until then?”

“Yes. I’ll see you soon.”

“Love you.”

With that, I ended the call – my heart lightened. God. What was wrong with me? Wondering what life would have been like if Simon wasn’t with me? The mere idea was inconceivable.

I stared at my phone, and the nickname I had given Simon, for several minutes before I pocketed it away. Dinner. And then, when he came, I could resume the work on our cosplay outfits for the event the week after next.

--

The dreams continued, though they mostly played out like memories of a time that sat parallel to what I knew to be true. Yet, they seemed so real. Back in my high school days, I lived a different life to the one I knew. Simon, for one, despite my best efforts, seemed to drift away from me. We had different circles of friends and pursued individual interests. The childhood connection we had was not strong enough to keep us linked.

Each morning I would wake up, covered in sweat, and glance to the spot next to mine in bed. On the days he stayed over, he was a warm presence by my side and my fears were allayed. For the nights that he had a particularly late shift, I had to wrangle my anxiety into submission with relief only brought upon by hearing Simon’s voice.

It was a dangerous line I walked.

And it felt like I was losing my mind. The mismatch of memories weighed heavily on my mind as I went through the motions of work and putting the finishing touches to both my and Simon’s costumes for the convention that was the coming weekend. After all, we were going as a pair from an animated show, though I had the feeling I had initially wanted it to be from my favourite video game.

Alas, the work would have been too great. At least for Simon’s outfit, as I had no access to a furnace if I wanted to ensure complete and utter accuracy. Foam was great and all, but nothing could beat a proper metal chain.

We finished the costumes just a day shy of the big event. To my great joy, as we tried them on, to learn that they fitted as well as a glove – although mine was a little tight around the chest. Simon, on the other land, looked impeccable. Once he had the wig on, he would be nigh on indistinguishable from the character he was cosplaying as.

I, on the other hand, was a little too short to be a perfect representation of my character. It didn’t matter though. What was important was that we were matched in perfect synchronicity and that others knew that we were together.

“Looking good. I could almost mistake you for an elf,” said Simon.

“The ears will go on tomorrow. I don’t want to risk damaging them.” Slowly and carefully, I tugged off my boots. “What about you? Ready for the big day?”

“You know it,” he said with a grin. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need the bathroom. And while these trousers are sublime, it’s going to take me a while to wiggle out of them.”

As soon as he disappeared down the hallway, the phone that he left on the coffee table lit up. I knew it was rude to take a look. Yet I feared that Simon would be called away for another shift at the hospital. So, risking a glance towards the bathroom, I picked up his phone and read the text message.

The words within immediately pierced my heart, shattering it into a thousand pieces. I tried my hardest to rationalise it all away. Surely, it was a joke. Or perhaps it had been sent to the wrong person.

But a second look only confirmed my worst fears. Why, on God’s green Earth, did it have to be Amy Fletcher?

Looking through the memories that weren’t my own, I knew she had been Simon’s girlfriend ever since Year 12 prom. During first year of university, they had broken up over something that most would have considered silly or stupid. At least, that was the rumour I’d heard on the grapevine as I focused on my own achievements. They had got back together in third year and everywhere they went, people said that they were inseparable. The perfect couple.

Yet, in my timeline, none of that happened. Simon was my boyfriend. Had been since high school. So, why the Hell was he receiving texts from Amy? And ones that seemed to border on what decent people might label licentious?

“What is this?” I demanded when Simon came back from his trip to the bathroom.

He looked at me, confused. “My phone?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, Simon,” I snapped at him, fuelled by righteous anger. “Why is Amy fucking Fletcher sending you texts?”

“We bumped into each other last Friday. One thing led to another and we had coffee. Then, I don’t know, we exchanged numbers,” said Simon, his tone defensive. “Nothing came of it. It was just an innocent and casual catch-up.”

I didn’t believe him. How could I? The evidence was right there. In my hand. “Then why is she asking for pics, Simon?”

He stepped up to face me, his face red as a tomato. Before I could react, he snatched his phone from my grasp and looked at the screen. A minute passed. Maybe two. All I heard in the deafening silence was the sound of my heart beating an erratic tattoo.

Then finally a giggle. A bit of a chuckle and before I knew it, Simon had thrown his head back as he laughed and laughed and laughed.

To say that I was shocked would have been an understatement. Here I was, with evidence of his infidelity, and all Simon did was find amusement at my own expense. It was enough for me to see red. Desperately, I tried to swipe his phone back. But he was taller. His arms much longer.

He dangled his phone just out of reach, as if it was all a game. Each time I jumped Simon would duck under my grasp. And when I shouted obscenities, he ignored them with an easy smile.

It was only when I had tears trailing down my cheeks, threatening to walk out and throw the costumes I had laboured over for countless hours into the nearest dumpster, that he finally stopped. The expression on his face now serious and concerned. “Oh, come on Sharon. Can’t you see? She was asking for our cosplay photos. Just innocent and harmless fun. Stop acting like a baby. You’re better than this.”

“Why? Amy has never cared for the ‘geeky’ stuff. In ninth grade, she said anime was for little kids or people that hadn’t grown up.”

“Give her a bit of credit, Sharon. Not everyone has to be into pop culture. Sure, they can watch a couple of shows on Netflix, but you shouldn’t deride them for liking things like The Christmas Prince instead of Die Hard.”

I knew he was right. It was Simon, after all. But I didn’t like it. I fell into a sullen silence. Intractable to any of his overtures for peace.

“Goddammit, Sharon. Don’t just shut me out,” he said as he changed into his shorts and a ratty old t-shirt he used as bedwear. I was already under the covers, after having spent a good forty minutes in the shower. He tried to cuddle, but I was having none of it. With a sigh, Simon turned away. I knew I was being spiteful, but I couldn’t help it. The rage was still there and it would not be appeased.

It was as if it had taken on a life of its own. One that screamed vengeance at the wrong that Amy fucking Fletcher had done to me by texting my boyfriend.

Even when the lights turned off, I lay in bed, brain in overdrive as I pondered my next steps. Amy Fletcher would not get away with this.

--

The next day dawned. Though I had not slept, I was still buzzing with nervous energy. Jittery, almost, in anticipation of what was to come. Simon kept mostly busy with convention preparations, pausing every so often to look at his phone.  He didn’t notice. Not when he saw the texts Amy sent his way. I wanted to wipe that giddy-looking smile off his face. How could he do this to me? I was his girlfriend. Not Amy.

Even as I seethed, I was reassured by the plan that had come to me overnight. The old memories – of another time – had provided the answer I sought: Amy Fletcher’s address. It wasn’t far. It was only a ten to twenty-minute drive away. Given the traffic, it was plenty of time to get there, do what I needed and return before we set out to the convention.

Just to ease the burgeoning anxiety within me, in case things should go horribly wrong, I had slipped out of bed at three and Googled the address in my head. The Street View of the house matched several photos on her Instagram and Facebook. If I was wrong, I would simply play it off as mistaken identity.

I couldn’t say it was a good plan. But it was the only one that I could come up with that would satisfy the raging beast inside me.

“Where are you going?” Simon asked when I headed to the door at a few minutes past seven.

“Hardware store,” I replied. “Picking up a few more things that I forgot. It’s for the costume.” And then, I made the error that would cost me nearly everything. “You know, glue gun refills. Just in case something falls off.”

Perhaps if I had stayed longer, I would have seen the consternation on Simon’s face. Focused solely on the goal that I had set for myself, I hurried to the car. In my bag, I had my phone, keys, wallet and a sharp knife that I filched from the kitchen.

Traffic was light and I arrived at Amy Fletcher’s house with time to spare. For several long minutes, I sat in the car. My mind was a cacophony of noise. A part of me wanted to abandon the crazy idea that had seized me. The other, louder part, wanted to push on. It was unable to rest easy knowing that there was a threat to the perfect image of Simon and I.

When my hands had steadied, I opened the car door and walked to the white front door on stiff legs. Just to the side, hidden in a small alcove, was the doorbell. I pressed it.

Every second that slipped by felt like an hour. Until the door opened and standing before me was Amy Fletcher, her long brown hair, with blond highlights, was tussled and she was dressed in pyjamas covered in cartoon rabbits.

“Hi. You’re Sharon, right? Simon talked a lot about you when we caught up the other day. He said that you were going to a convention today. What brings you here?”

“Well, I heard you lived close by and I was in the neighbourhood,” I said, ducking underneath her arm as I forced my way inside. “This place is lovely. Did it cost a lot? God, I’m kind of envious, y’know. Simon and I, well, we haven’t been able to afford a house yet.”

“Hold on. Stop.” Amy Fletcher called out after me as I took a look at her two-bedroom house, situated in a quiet and idyllic suburb. “You can’t just come barging in. I know that we used to go to high school together, but it’s still very early in the morning.”

She caught up with me as I arrived in the kitchen, puffing a little. Her hand landed on my shoulder: a warning and a threat. It was enough.

I whirled around, one hand digging deep in my purse until my fingers had curled around the handle of my sharpest kitchen knife, and then I plunged the blade into her chest. Thirty fucking times.

Her screams were delicious as blood spurted. The beast, lurking with me, was appeased at the sight. As Amy Fletcher lay on the ground, her heart pumping out the last few litres of blood, a feral grin stretched across my face. I had done it. Simon was mine.

As I headed to the sink to wash up, I heard the first faint sirens. I dismissed it at first, until my phone rang.

Beau.

I picked up. What else could I do? Simon was my one and only. I didn’t know who had ratted me out, but I knew that I had to tell Simon. He would understand. He would be there for me.

“What have you done, Sharon?” were his first words to me. “I called the cops as soon as I noticed the missing knife. Tell me you haven’t done anything to harm Amy.”

Red. All I saw was red at his words.

“I’ve removed her from the equation,” I said with murderous glee, hoping to wound him with my words. How dare he accuse me when I was trying to salvage our relationship? If I hadn’t acted, Amy Fletcher would have inserted herself into our everyday and ruined our lives. “Don’t you understand, Simon? She was a fucking homewrecker. I did you a favour. I did the fucking world a favour.”

“You’re mad.”

Me? Mad? Simon thought I was crazy?

I laughed at the insinuation. Simon knew nothing of my madness. Of what I would do just to keep the world mine. The lengths I would go…

But as I looked at the dead body before me, the reality of my situation came crashing down on me. I know I shouldn’t have found it funny, but I could not stop. One I had started, all I could see was my future slipping away because of the mess I made. Tears pricked at the corner of my eyes. Why had I let all my fears and anxieties take control? Amy Fletcher, despite all her faults, did not deserve what I did to her.

The police found me in the kitchen, murder weapon in my right hand and my phone in the left.

As they dragged me out, handcuffed, I continued to laugh. Even as the world faded to laugh, all I could hear were my high-pitched cackles of depravity…

--

With a groan, I woke up, and blearily blinked at my surroundings. It took me a moment to recognise that I was still seated at the kitchen table, my face pressed against the keys of my laptop. Beside me, was an empty glass of red wine. As for the bottle itself, it had rolled to a stop on the counter-top and seemed ready to plunge over the side. Luckily, I had corked it or else I would be cleaning up the stains for a few weekends.

Shit. Stiffly, I got out of my seat to rescue the still half-full bottle. As I picked it up, I managed to catch a glimpse of the label.

Devil’s Touch: Let your inner desires come alive

I scoffed. Yeah right. More like my bloody nightmares. Running a hand over my face, I wondered if anything had been real or if it had just been an overactive imagination fuelled by the alcohol I had ingested. Probably the latter, I decided as I placed the bottle into the fridge.

Glancing quickly at the time, 3:50AM, I packed up my laptop and headed to my bedroom.

Just as I was about to grab another two or three hours of oblivion, I was startled back into full awareness when I heard a sharp rap on my apartment door. There was no mistaking the sound, however hard I wanted to try. I looked at my phone. It had ticked to 4 in the morning.

Grousing, I slipped into my robe and padded on sock-covered feet to see who had come calling in the early hours of the morning. Whoever it was, they had better have a good explanation for disturbing the rest of my pitiful night, I thought, as I opened the door.

[rancoeur-the-unfortunate]

Pills (Chapter 25)

Skoodge looked down at the Doctor's hand, was this the route he wanted to take? On one hand, the Doctor had all the power he could easily tell the Tallests that he was off his medication and there would be nothing Skoodge could do about it. On the other, joining him meant siding with the Irken who caused this nightmare. The rebellion, Irk, Zim all things Skoodge believed he would be betraying if he shook the Doctor's hand right now.

Zim... the same Zim who was currently out of his mind right now and probably doesn't even remember their time together.

Skoodge looked back up to the Doctor's face.

"Before I decide anything, I want to know. What do you plan to do with Zim?"

"Well, the original plan was to change Zim's drug formula and make it so that instead of being an insane megalomaniac, he would become my head general, Zim can be made into a very powerful weapon if controlled by the right hands." The Doctor explained.

He paused and gazed into Skoodge's hurt filled eyes.

"But since that would most likely make me lose the support I need in this matter, obviously I need to change said plan." The Doctor sighed and pulled his hand away for a second to pull up his goggles onto his forehead, revealing his now blue again eyes. As Skoodge looked into those eyes he couldn't help but feel uneasy by the tired yet sincere look in them.

"My quarrel was never with the Irken race, Skoodge. It was the Control Brains who I wanted to destroy. They made me, I wouldn't be alive right now if it wasn't for them and I can never forgive them for that. Considering all I've done, I've been nothing but a stain on Irken society. All I ask is your help in their destruction and I swear no living Irken will ever have to see my face again. I'm sure you and Zim will gladly fix Irk and make it better than it ever was before." The Doctor reached his hand out once more to Skoodge.

Skoodge once again looked back down at that hand. As he weighed his options he noticed the Doctor's arm began shaking, he could see the lump beginning to swell within his forearm. He gripped his shaking limb and fell to his knees in pain. He hissed and a look of panic filled his eyes. Slowly, Skoodge could see it as the pain-filled those orbs so did something else. The Doctor's eyes were slowly turning into a shade of lime green.

The Doctor's groan in pain snapped Skoodge out of his stupor and he dashed to the table to grab some syringes. He knelt beside the Doctor and forced the bigger Irken to lean on him as he got to work on siphoning out the green liquid.

The Doctor winced at each injection and tried looking away but eventually found himself gripping Skoodge's arm for comfort. After five injections the swelling had finally gone down. The Doctor gently squeezed Skoodge's arm.

"That'll do Skoodge."

The short Irken nodded and helped the Doctor to his feet as said Irken pocketed the syringes.

"So... do we have a deal?" The Doctor spoke between pants.

Skoodge sighed but nodded.

"Yeah. we have a deal."

"You know Dib, I won't lie when we started this, I was a little more than skeptical about this trip," Zim spoke as the two were making their way back into their neighborhood. They were still holding hands amazingly enough.

"Heh, same here. I was almost certain you'd try to kill me in my sleep." Dib smirked as they started down Zim's street. The plan was to drop Zim off at his house and Dib would walk back to his place after. He'd probably have to set up more cameras in this area (more than he already had) just to be sure the Swollen Eyeball wasn't still poking around.

"Foolish human, Zim would never kill you in your sleep. Zim would kill you while you were awake, that way I could watch the life bleed from your eyes!" Zim smiled with a look of pride.

Dib sighed and shook his head but a small smile remained on his tired face. Same old, same old.

"Well if I wanted to kill you, I'd make it on an operating table. Cutting you open and exploring your insides." The two went silent for a bit with Dib holding his head up and Zim giving the human a worried glance before the two broke out into laughter.

That laughter and mirth remained until they met the front door of Zim's house, where they both turned to face each other.

"So uh, we're here."

"Um yes, yes we are." Zim averted his gaze for a moment before turning to look at Dib once more. From the flower crown that sat on his head to dirty worn shoes. With a quick breath, Zim snapped his finger and pointed downwards. Dib tilted his head in confusion before taking the kneeling position in front of Zim once more. Before he could ask what this was for Zim grabbed both sides of the boy's head, pushed their foreheads together, and gently yet quickly ran his antennae through Dib's hair and along his sythe. He soon pulled back and ran inside his house before slamming the door behind him. Leaving a blushing and confused Dib in his wake.

It took the human a few minutes to gather enough of his thoughts to stand up and smile slightly to himself and turn around and head home. He had next to no idea what had just happened but it felt amazing for some reason and he just could stop smiling.

As soon as Zim slammed the door he slid down it almost in awe of his actions. But before he could think about it he was immediately tackled by his robot subordinate.

"MASTER IS HOME! MASTER IS HOME!" GIR screamed with sheer delight as he held Zim's waist in an almost death grip. "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN 34 GAZZILION YEARS!" The robot then started crying and rubbing it's 'face' into Zim's tunic.

Zim groaned and wriggled a bit trying to get out of the tiny robot's grasp.

"Yes yes GIR, I'm home now let go of me." The Irken sighed in annoyance.

"Not until you hug me back!" GIR squealed from his spot in Zim's lap.

Normally Zim would tell the robot no and would just use his pak legs to escape. But Zim felt generous so he gave the robot a light-hearted pat on the head. Gir smiled and ran off screaming as he went down the trash can "MASTER HOME! MASTER HOME! MAster ho-" his voice disappearing as he went further in the lab.

Zim couldn't help but smile as the little robot ran off to let everyone else know of his arrival. He sat down on the couch, exhausted both physically and emotionally.

Agent Callus knelt back down behind one of Zim's neighbors' bushes. He made sure to snap as many photos as possible of Zim and Dib's interaction. Eseaspically with strange antenna thing. Was Dib bonded with this alien? This was the last thing he expected from the guy. Then again those moments Agent Callus had managed to capture did seem pretty intimate.

The brunette then focused his attention back to Dib, normally he'd stay at Zim's house but something told him he'd get more information at Dib's house. So he followed the other while remaining at a distance. For someone who is well known as paranoid and on edge, Dib seemed pretty distracted at the moment.

Once at Dib's house Callus hid behind another bush across the street and pulled his tablet from his bag. He spent a good amount of his savings on the bugs he placed throughout the bottom floor of the Membrane house. Courtesy of Professor Membrane letting him in to talk when he asked where he was. While the professor was in the kitchen preparing tea the teen had managed to place a bug under the coffee table and when they sat at the kitchen table to chat, he placed a bug under the said table too.

Callus turned on his tablet, plugged in his headphones, and listened in. Hoping he could get something to help further prove Zim to be an alien.

Once Dib was inside his home the first thing he did was drop his heavy backpack with a sigh of relief before glancing about the room. Dad, of course, was nowhere to be seen and Gaz was sitting on the couch playing her Game Slave 2. The boy smiled a bit and went to the fridge to grab a juice box and sat on the side of the couch opposite his sister.

"Dad at work?" He asked while grabbing the remote to turn on the TV.

"Yeah." Came the short response.

The two were quiet for a moment as the theme for Mysterious Mysteries started to play. Yes, despite the age Dib still watched the show. Call it a nostalgia thing.

Surprisingly, it was Gaz to break the silence.

"How was your trip?" She asked, her eyes never leaving her game.

"Oh um, it was... interesting to say the least."

"You spent the week with your worst enemy Dib, of course, it would be interesting. Anything else?"

"Well, I fell into a river and almost died via a waterfall."

His sister chuckled.

"What about you? How'd you spend your week without your annoying brother to bother you? Bet you didn't look up from that screen once." Dib teased.

"Actually I spent the majority of it at your boyfriend's house," Gaz smirked as Dib's face went red with blush.

"Zim isn't my boyfriend Gaz!"

"I never said it was Zim's house." Gaz's evil smirk never faded.

Dib shook his head and waved her off. "Whatever, what were you doing at Zim's house anyways."

"Well as I said before. Zim's moose thing made come over and said you guys were in trouble and it needed my help. At first, I was gonna say know but the Moose offered to buy me one of the alien game machines and I swear to god Dib if you dismantle it just to look at the 'alien parts' I'll kill you." She tilted the game his way to show him that it wasn't, in fact, her Game Slave but something else entirely. The colors were different as well as the symbols on the buttons, the graphics on the screen were upgraded too.

"Wait so what did Minimoose need you to do?"

"Help build upgrades for the house as well as keep intruders out. I got Keef in a cage in one of the sub-labs."

Dib smirked for a second at the thought of Keef having to deal with his sister. But that smirk quickly went away.

"Wait, upgrades?"

Gaz cocked a brow at his late of regard for Keef but brushed it off.

"Yeah, the moose wanted the house's defenses to be stronger. Zim's Tallest are still after him you know."

Dib sighed as he slouched against the couch.

"I know, not to mention the Swollen Eyeball might try to kidnap Zim as well."

"You know, you never told me why you were doing all of this."

"Huh?" Dib turned to look back at his sister, who in turn actually PAUSED her game to look him in the eye.

"Why are you doing this? Why are you going through all this trouble to protect Zim? Hell, a week ago you would have been pretty set on letting the Swollen Eye thing take Zim in a heartbeat, but now? It's like your whole deal has changed. What happened over there?"

Dib looked away at his feet for a moment, unsure how to answer his sister's question.

"...If I'm being honest Gaz, I honestly don't know. It's like these past few months I did nothing but try to get everyone to focus on Zim enough to notice the alien beneath that crappy human disguise. But when people started to finally pay attention long enough all I could feel was anger and... GAH I don't know. Ever since we were in elementary Skool, Zim was MY alien and just the thought of others trying to catch him, I don't know it just pissed me off. So I tried to get everyone to leave Zim be and for the most part, I was right. I checked the Skool's forum and pretty much everyone has forgotten about Zim's 'drug addiction' but the Swollen Eyeball I know won't let up that quickly. I'll have to find a way to convince them Zim is normal."

"Why don't you go back to trying to convince them he's an alien that seemed to do the trick."

"Haha very funny," Dib replied sarcastically.

Gaz smiled for a bit before unpausing her game and turning her attention back to it while Dib went back to watching Mysterious Mysteries and to fell back into a comfortable silence.

Callus smirked a made sure to record all that was said on his tablet.

Withholding information about an alien from the Swollen Eyeball.

Befriending said alien.

Mentioning the Swollen Eyeball to a nonmember of the group!

Dib could get kicked out of the Swollen Eyeball for good if Callus released this recording. Even though that wasn't Callus' end intention it would definitely be a bonus. Callus smirked and begun to pack up belongings and made his trek home.

(Hello everyone, I'd like to take the time to thank all of you for reading this story and having the patience to wait for each chapter to come out. As some of you know I live in Florida and live under constant quarantine and where I live I can't go to certain places without a mask on, as well as, leave my home after curfew. It sucks and I hate it. But that's the way it is now and we have to adapt to the new changes. At least until this whole Corona thing goes away. I hope all of you stay safe and healthy. Remember to stay inside unless you absolutely have to and wash your hands to help stop the spread of Covid-19.)