#expired fandom moment

[vvriskerrs]

DUDE R THERE ANY PEOPLE THAT REMEMBER TALES FROM THE FOUNDATION OR DETECTIVE VOID. . . MY ASS IS SOOO LATE 2 THOSE CUZ NOW IM OBSESSED WITH DR BUCK N BRAN PLEEEASE DO ANY OF U REMEMBER THEM🙏🙏

please come back my beautiful wife i need u

[aphel1on]

not sure how to phrase this but something i have been ruminating on recently is that xue yang is strangely fragile. obviously he is also incredibly resilient. he survived, and continues to survive, impossible things. he has a million barriers between himself and the world, but none of this actually matters when it comes to what he feels. everything is personal to him. everything pierces straight through all that armor and goes right to his battered heart, the heart that no one else believes he has. that even he is not fully cognizant of. the world strikes and strikes and strikes and so he strikes and strikes and strikes back, even (especially) when the wound is something other people would not think worthy of retribution.

xue yang would never realize this- would be outraged at the concept of it- but the way everything, everything is something to rally a defense against is in itself a form of fragility. he does not know how to let go of things, or let them pass him by. passivity is death. so he is ruthlessly cruel and violent. he projects himself as a lunatic untouchable by anything you might possibly do to him, and on some level he even believes this. but in actuality he is one raw emotional wound. he never learned to separate himself from his emotions, much less process them. the volatility is not so much insanity as it is the constant lashing out of an animal in a trap, and the trap is the world, and the trap is himself, and he is never going to get out. and like so much else, this pain is just part of the background radiation of his life. it hardly registers. to be able to register the hurt, you would have to be able to register a time in which you were not hurt.

i feel like it is a fragility that could blossom into such tenderness, given exactly the right set of circumstances. how at the very first touch of softness in his life he fell into a domesticity from which he never recovered. how much was there, still, to be salvaged from the cruelty. on some level i am always thinking about the little apple bunnies. about the meal for daozhang and the straw in a-qing's bed.

it was too little, too late. it shattered like glass when the world intruded back in. but the tenderness was there. no one, least of all xue yang, knows what might have happened had it been unearthed in him any sooner.

[pomefioredove]

tbh i wanna hear you out on why you like cateryuu (as a non cater fan)

hehe. personal bias aside I think cater is a very underappreciated character and is more complex and interesting than the fandom gives him credit for

much like rook, his thing is that he never lets anyone get close to him. his bubbly, energetic, almost flirtatious personality is a lie. a persona he puts on to protect himself. cater has a lot of issues with self-esteem, and he seems to constantly need validation and attention from strangers (whether that be his magicam followers or his classmates). heavily implied to be very depressed

there's a vignette, I believe it's his labwear, where he's trying to imbue a little of his personality into this plant (it has a name but I'm blanking I'm so tired), and no matter how many times he tries to make it cute or cool or whatever, it just ends up kinda. sad?

he has a poor family life, it seems, and they moved around a lot when he was young so he never really kept any friends, and he has major rejection sensitivity, and he kinda hates himself, and he's very depressed, so he lies and manipulates and puts on a persona to keep people away from the real him

the reason I find this really interesting with yuu specifically is because their friendship has an expiration date. yuu is going to go home (or that's what they (and crowley) say). yuu is going to leave him, just like everyone else

you would think that cater, professional self-hater, terrified of rejection, never makes friends to keep them, wouldn't even bother with yuu. but he does

I think there's definitely something to be said about the understanding they share. cater has never really felt stable in anything, not with himself, not with his family, not with his friends, and yuu is in a similar place. they have no home here, no future, their friends are only temporary until they go back. they struggle with feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy. these are all things that cater can relate to, that make him care about yuu in a way that he knows he shouldn't, because he can't get attached to things, he doesn't get attached to things, especially when that thing is a person who's destined to leave him

but he does, anyway

it's very angsty

from this post, which includes information on yuu:

there are a lot of intimate, quiet moments here that you wouldn't really associate with cater. and that's what makes them so significant to me. he's not putting on a persona for yuu, he's not manipulating them, he's not looking for validation or attention, he's being a genuinely loving friend

he seems to care for them, way more than he lets on

they just have an angsty doomed lovers dynamic that I really like. "don't make me fall in love with you" type thing. cater is an interesting character.jpg

[nyxelestia]

Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion in Fandom Community Spaces

One of my fandom servers recently imploded. I didn’t just want to post my immediate reactions and spend the next 3-5 business years litigating my feelings, so I took a few months to deconstruct what happened. Now I’m reconstructing everything into a case study on white supremacy culture in progressive spaces.

Below the poll, I’ve spelled out 17 traits of white supremacy culture, as they appear in progressive spaces, organized into four categories. I relied predominantly on the works of Tema Okun and Robin DiAngelo, whose works and websites expand upon everything I talk about.

I don’t want anyone to beat each other (or themselves) up if they’ve noticed these traits. Just fix it.

My goals with this guide:

Fans can put names to their observations.

Mods/Leaders of fandom spaces ask themselves, “how many of these have I done?”

Everyone gets an idea for what can be done about these traits.

Each listed trait has:

Definition of the trait

Common or fandom-specific examples

Suggestions to begin fixing it

Additional Commentary specific to this particular server incident

That makes this post very long, but it should be easy to skip over sections.

(If you are thinking of sending someone this post because they expressed a lot of these traits, first take a moment and identify how many of these traits you have practiced.

If someone sent you this post as an accusation, show them the above paragraph and ask what traits they recognize in their own behavior. If they say "none," ignore that person. I have will not facilitate the use of anti-racism as a smokescreen for bullying.)

I wasn't able to put this poll at the bottom of the post. I encourage you to wait until you get to the end and then answer the poll.

Because Tumblr polls expire in a week, I also encourage you to answer the same poll here on StrawPoll.

White Supremacy Culture Traits

Context (Basic Outline of What Happened)

In late Oct. 2023, someone on this server made an insensitive joke regarding Native American spirituality. They were quickly corrected by another member, and a third, indigenous member defended the gravity of their culture.

In DMs, a server mod (without the knowledge of the rest of the mod team) rebuked that indigenous server member for mini-modding, but claimed they would also moderate the person who made the joke in the first place; that person who made the joke was this mod’s friend.

This Inciting Incident Mod never did moderate their friend. When this came to light for the rest of the mod team in early Dec. 2023, the Inciting Incident Mod left before they could be ‘fired.’ Meanwhile, the Server Owner tried to cover up the preceding mess when announcing this mod’s departure.

The Indigenous Server Member used @everyone to explain to the server what had happened, dropped screenshots, and left the server.

When the community at large, including other mods, demanded more accountability and action from the mod team and the admins, the Server Owner doubled down on their defensiveness and denials for the next month.

Behind the scenes/in mod chats, the rest of the mods tried to advocate for the same things that the community was demanding. Most of their suggestions were shot down and input disregarded (primarily by the Server Owner).

Ultimately, all the mods were “let go” (fired), leaving only two admins. The second Admin largely followed the lead of the Server Owner, who was the one posting most of the announcements and engaging in the discourse.

The Admins unilaterally froze the server mid-conversations in late Jan. 2024.

They deleted the server on March 4th, 2024.

I. White Fragility

White fragility is the various phenomena by which white fans’ distress at discussions of racism take precedence over the actual occurrences of racism. This is not a conscious tactic, but the result of the layers of insulation from irl racism that white people are conditioned with, combined with white culture and experience being so pervasive as to become invisible.

1: Right To Comfort

Believing that white fans’ requirement for comfort in fandom spaces is more important than the on-going discomfort fans of color experience in the same spaces.

Examples:

Prioritizing the emotional and psychological comfort of some fans over the on-going experiences of other fans.

Scapegoating those who named the racism in the community and accusing them of ‘rocking the boat.’

These might sound familiar:

"This is just supposed to be a fun hobby."

"Can we get back to the good vibes?"

"Why can't we all just get along?"

“Hobbies/Fun shouldn’t be this much work.”

Treating any and all discussion of racism as acts of antagonism.

Fixes:

Learn to sit with discomfort before responding or (re)acting, especially if faced with an accusation. It’s an opportunity for growth, not an opening for attack.

Avoid taking criticisms personally, and avoid treating feedback as accusations. Yes, some accusations and call-outs are personal, but most are not. Even the ones that are personal need not be treated as final value judgments nor the end of the world.

Additional Commentary:

The white fan who’d made the insensitive joke in the first place did not lash out at being corrected. The discomfort was predominantly from some white mods who interpreted all mentions of racism as a conflict.

This trait is frequently found the trait called ‘Urgency.’

2: Defensiveness

Reacting to criticisms as if they were personal attacks, prioritizing comfort over growth, and using hurt feelings to derail discussions.

As author @xiranjayzhao put it in their video discussing a similar incident in the publishing industry, “If you are more concerned at being called racist than racism itself, that is an active hindrance to dismantling racism.”

Examples:

Treating criticism as threatening, inappropriate, or rude.

Focusing on making sure one’s own feelings or the feelings of community leaders are not getting hurt. This process often takes up more time and energy than addressing the actual problems do.

Spend energy defending against charges of racism instead of examining how racism might actually be happening.

White fans targeted by other oppressions (I.e. sexism, homophobia, etc.) express resentment because they feel that the naming of racism is erasing their experiences of marginalization from their other identities. This is especially prevalent in fandom as our communities are dominated by women and queer people.

Fixes:

Identify and understand the link between defensiveness and fear. When you recognize your own defensiveness, ask yourself what you are defending, and what you feel that you are defending against.

Develop culture of naming defensiveness when it arises.

Be honest with yourself and with the community about the power dynamics in the situation and respond thoughtfully. The person with greater power has the greater responsibility to name and move through their own defensiveness.

This is most important for small, online community leaders (I.e. Discord server mods). However little power we feel like we have, we still have more power than all the other members.

Additional Commentary:

Defensiveness was ultimately the biggest problem in this particular server’s implosion, and continues to be the most prevalent problem I observe in many other communities. The majority of the problems in these communities came not from actual acts of racism or patterns of insensitivity, but a few white fans’ defensiveness when these were named.

3: Fear of Open Conflict

When discomfort with talking about racism begets outright avoidance. This becomes “toxic positivity,” creating a pattern of suppressing any and all disagreements with a fixation on “keeping the peace.”

Examples:

Ignoring or deflecting conflict, no matter how minor.

Emphasis on tone, performing friendliness, and on everyone ‘calming down’ once even a hint of conflict arises.

Scapegoating people who bring up racism or equating criticisms with ‘rudeness.’

Fixes:

Role play, discuss, or plan for ways to handle conflict before it happens.

Don't require hard issues to be raised in `acceptable' ways.

Once a conflict is resolved, revisit it and see how it might have been handled differently.

Additional Commentary:

This particular server’s admin team was understandably hypersensitive to conflict; the server had been previously wracked by fandom dramas unrelated to racism. However, this sympathetic feeling metastasized into an unsympathetic habit of total conflict suppression. Had that Inciting Incident Mod not reacted to that faint hint of friction, or had the admins later been willing to name and acknowledge mistakes from the moderation team as an unintended instance of racism, almost none of this final drama would have happened.

4: Denial

Insistence that racism is an individual problem that requires intent; refusal to see or acknowledge systemic problems brought to one’s attention.

Examples:

A pattern of downplaying or denying what POC are saying about their experiences.

Insisting intent is more important than impact.

Insisting that if someone did not mean to be racist, then the harms they perpetuated cannot have been serious.

Insisting that a person or group can free from racialized conditioning, leading to statements like "I don't see color," “I don’t care what anyone’s race is,” “we can’t even tell race on the Internet,” and "we're all the same."

Fixes:

Learn to acknowledge any fear that naming racism brings up; the feeling is not wrong or right.­ Move through the feeling and address what has been raised.

Assume that any naming of racism is on target. Instead of asking, “is it racism,” ask, “how is it racism?”

Learn not to take accusations of racism or white supremacy culture as personal attacks or criticisms.

Get into the habit of saying, “tell me more,” instead of jumping to denial and counter arguments.

II. Exceptionalism

AKA “the Illusion of Control.” The belief, conscious or subconscious, that one knows the right way to do things and is uniquely qualified implement it. This might literally mean one’s self, or just people similar to one’s self.

5: Paternalism

The belief that one can dictate what is ‘best’ for everyone or make decisions on others’ behalf without their input.

Examples:

Deeming it unnecessary to understand the viewpoints and experiences of people for whom one is making decisions.

Labeling people for whom one is making decisions as unqualified.

Majority of community members get marginalized from decision-making processes. Either there is no mechanism for community input, or community input is disregarded by those in power.

Frequently, these decisions also have the most outsized impact on those with the least power, e.x. members who don’t have personal friendships with mods.

Fixes:

Realize that everyone has a worldview, including you. No one’s experiences or education (or lack thereof) disqualifies them from having agency in your community.

Always include those most affected by community decisions in the brainstorming and decision-making processes.

Build in an understanding that every approach yields unintended consequences; even the most strategically made decisions will have unanticipated consequences.

Additional Commentary:

The Server Owner consistently made unilateral decisions on other people’s behalf. They also required members to be 21+ in this server, despite the show it was for only being 18+

In the interest of living up to my own standards, I must acknowledge that I was also being paternalistic.

When I first joined the server, I questioned that age requirement. The Server Owner claimed that they felt uncomfortable talking about mature topics around 18-20 year olds…and “joked” that they viewed 18-20 year olds like children. Their defensiveness reminded me of elementary school children insisting kids in the grade immediately below them are babies. On the spot, I thought the Server Owner must be in their early 20s at the oldest. With zero evidence but a lot of confirmation bias, this feeling cemented into an assumption due to some of their moderation choices (e.x. pinning messages by their whims, thus confusing newcomers). I even wondered if they grew up in a cult environment due to unusual gaps in their knowledge (e.x. being surprised that it didn’t snow in most of Thailand). I thought I could and should, over time, convince them of 'better' ways to moderate, and attributed my disagreements with some of their moderation choices to their youth.

Then the Server Owner mentioned having been to uni nearly 20 years ago, making them almost double the age I’d assumed they were.

Looking back, this was an act of paternalism on my part that spanned over a year and a half. I’m not proud of this, and I would like to think I would still come to be ashamed of this even if the Server Owner actually had been as young as I thought they were. Regardless of their actual age, this was an incredibly paternalistic viewpoint for me to have about any adult.

6: Power Hoarding

People scrabbling to hold onto whatever little power they have; resisting anything which makes them feel threatened in their position of leadership or influence.

Examples:

Feeling threatened when someone suggests changes in how things should be done in the community.

Suggestions for change often get taken as an indicator of poor leadership.

People with power insisting they do not feel threatened or defensive in the face of suggestions for change.

Assuming that anyone wanting a change are ill-informed or malicious.

“Blaming the messenger,” such as focusing on the person advocating for change rather than the substance of what change they are trying to make.

Fixes:

Leaders should expect challenges and change and learn to see this a sign that someone cares about the community enough to want to stay and reform it. Because our spaces are predominantly for hobbies, people have less need to stay, even if they have a strong desire to. If someone truly thought we were hopeless leaders, they would not be advocating for change; they would just leave.

Adopt a “tell me more” approach when someone suggests a change or challenges an existing structure * even if the thing they are trying to change is something you care deeply about preserving.

Make friends with your ego. Everyone has one. You’ll do better in the long run when you know what will automatically kick up your defensiveness; don’t try to pretend nothing will.

Additional Commentary:

The admins caused many of their own problems by consistently disregarding others’ input; they not only ignored the criticisms of the community, they ‘fired’ the entire rest of the mod team for giving suggestions that the admins did not want to hear.

7: Individualism

Believing that one can be immune from social conditioning and systemic biases, or that individual actions are sufficient to change a community.

Examples:

Believing that one can be “isolated” from the conditioning of the culture they were raised in.

Not seeing the ways dominant identities * in gender, class, sexuality, religion, able-bodiedness, age, etc. * are informed by belonging to a group that shapes cultural norms and behavior.

This one is also hard for people in fandom to recognize. Many of us are marginalized in one aspect of our identity, and marginalization in one area can make it incredibly difficult to recognize or acknowledge privilege in another.

Accusing people advocating for change of “not being team players,” because one does not recognize the large groups on whose behalf they are advocating for.

Focusing on whether or not an individual “is racist,” while ignoring systemic racism in the community’s culture or leadership.

Fixes:

Get into the habit of acknowledging both your marginalizations and your privileges. For example, I am a queer woman of color, which are three traits of marginalization. I was also raised middle-class, I have a college degree, and I am cis; three traits of privilege. All these traits inform my experiences and world view and make me subjective in different ways.

Learn how our dominant identities and how our membership in dominant identity groups informs us both overtly and covertly (while realizing too that these identities do not have to define us).

Realize we all have internalized conditioning, including racist conditioning. Commitment to anti-racism is not about being ‘good’ or ‘bad;’ it’s a commit to challenge one’s own conditioning and subconscious biases on an on-going basis.

Focus on collective accountability as much as individual accountability.

Because many people, especially on social media, use ‘accountability’ as a euphemism for ‘punishment,’ I want to be clear that this does not mean collective punishment. It means recognizing that people react to their peers (dis)approval on even the smallest scale, that people want to fit in, and that people often fear standing out. We are often not making individual decisions so much as “going with their gut” or “going with the flow.” When that’s the case, that means we need to re-condition what our gut tells us and change where that flow is going * both of which are community actions, not individual ones.

Additional Commentary:

In the Individualism page on her website, Tema Okun shared a personal story about how her upbringing had blinded her to the very real risks her POC colleagues faced even while working with well-intentioned white leaders. This story resonated with me and my experience in this fandom server.

The white admins either did not understand (or did not care) what it would cost a POC like me to try to help them. I was attempting to mediate rather than prosecute, and speaking gently as I did - which I was only doing to try to balance the need for change against the admins’ need for white comfort. Multiple people blocked me during this time period, and most did not see what came after. I try not to assume I’m more important or relevant than I am, but I and many others noticed the drastic change in the admins’ behavior once my rhetoric shifted from ‘benefit of the doubt’ to ‘naming mistakes and suggesting changes.’ I was trying to help the admins, but it came out to nothing and I still ended up paying a price and losing friends.

8: I'm The Only One

The assumption that one knows best; therefore, they have the unique right and responsibility to take unilateral action.

Examples:

Believing that the only way to get something done right is to do it one’s self. (Related to ‘One Right Way.’)

Believing that only one person is entitled or qualified to determine the right way and take action, typically in isolation from the people who will be impacted by our decisions.

Often goes hand-in-hand with micro-management (or in the case of online communities, micro-moderation).

Attempting to downplay or cover-up flaws or mistakes in leadership, fearing that the community cannot survive people discovering leadership isn’t perfect.

Fixes:

Hold ourselves and each other accountable for mistakes without assuming that we need to be perfect to lead.

Focus on collaborative and collective strategies for responding to mistakes, including accountability but also growth and inner development.

Leaders should make an effort to take in input from as many sources as possible, including the people saying things they do not like, do not want to hear or are challenging their leadership.

Especially the individuals who hold the most power, such as server admins and owners (who have more power than other mods). The higher up in this hierarchy that we are, the more likely that anyone who truly thinks we’re hopeless would simply opt to leave…which means the higher up in the hierarchy we are, the more likely that anyone who is challenging us still expects both themselves and us to stay where we are. Their challenges are not a threat, but an opportunity for growth.

Additional Commentary:

Those last two bullet points under Examples and Instances are what kicked off the entire server-ending drama in the first place. Even though the Inciting Incident Mod made a truly disappointing mistake, I don’t actually see them as having made the biggest misstep in this mess. This mod micro-managed someone and abused their power to shield a friend, but had the admins been willing to acknowledge those mistakes directly, most of the ensuing drama would not have happened.

When I asked the Server Owner to let someone else take over the server instead of closing it off completely, they claimed all the people I suggested were not equipped to handle the server. The only person they were willing to let take over the server was someone who had uncritically supported them during all the discourse. (Though I later found out that this entire discussion was never in good faith to begin with; explanation in the Final Feelings section below.)

9: Entitlement.

Assuming a right to something without any consideration for the possibility that one may not have the right. This assumption frequently is unidirectional and/or implicitly only functions as long as most other people do not have a similar right.

This trait was not core to either Tema Okun’s work on white supremacy culture nor Robin DiAngelo’s work on white fragility. However, it is an underlying component of racism (who is entitled to what), white supremacy culture (entitlement to other people’s works), and white fragility (entitlement to comfort).

Examples:

Assuming that one does not need to ask (or wait for an answer) to use someone else’s work for one’s own purposes. (Related to the trait ‘Urgency.’)

Believing that people’s boundaries regarding their work or creations do not matter. I hope I don’t need to spell out why this problem gets so in fanfic-based fandom spaces. That can of worms would need its own post and I’m already exhausted from this post.

Related to Right to Comfort: believing one is entitled to a peaceful community, even when it comes at the expense of everyone else’s sense of safety and belonging.

Fixes:

Assume one does not have permission until and unless told you do.

Graciousness if someone does not want you to use their works.

Their reasons may have nothing to do with you, so also learn not take someone else’s refusal personally.

When you do assume a right, take a moment to imagine it’s reversal (I.e. everyone else having the same rights to your work or output). How comfortable are you with this prospect of everyone ‘borrowing’ from you that which you are currently trying to borrow from someone else?

Additional Commentary:

I detailed my direct experience with the admins' entitlement down below under the trait titled ‘Urgency.’

This trend continued with their behaviors towards what server content they did and didn’t delete prior to deleting the whole server. When fans who left or were banned insisted all their own messages in the server be deleted, they were refused on the basis of ‘preserving’ the server. Yet the admins had no problems deleting every channel that had even a shred of discourse in it. They later deleted a few other channels on the grounds of people’s personal information potentially being in those channels and putting members at risk…except that if there was any such information, it had always been present in this channels; why did it suddenly matter now? I concede that they eventually deleted the individual members’ messages per their requests, and that the fear-mongering about private information came from another member altogether. However, between nebulous accusations that an admin had been party to a past doxxing of this member in the first place and the on-going problem of the admins behaving with false urgency (another trait below), I’m having a very hard time being sympathetic about this or giving them any more benefit of the doubt. Their selection of which channels to delete look less like protecting server members and more like a failed attempted to protect their own reputations.

III. Binary Thinking

This is not just a futile attempt to simplify reality, but an entitlement to a simplified reality and a habit of attempting to force others into one’s own dualistic constructions.

10: Either/Or

Polarization of issues and assumptions, categorical thinking, and viewing everything through this binary lens.

Examples:

Positioning or presenting options or issues as either/or -- good/bad, right/wrong, with us/against us, pro/anti, good/evil, safe/dangerous, etc.

Related to Perfectionism: a suggested solution must be either perfect or it’s useless.

Tendency to escalate instead of de-escalating, especially in a context where de-escalating is viewed as dismissing a problem.

Generalizing individual experiences or statements to the collective, or attempting to dismiss a claim because it is coming from an individual; either “everyone” is saying something or “no one” is saying it.

Fixes:

Cultivate a habit or community culture of looking for multiple ‘takes,’ viewpoints, and conclusions.

Break the habit of trying to sort people and ideas into two or a few categories.

Practice taking situations with seemingly only two possibilities and identifying points between them or alternative options altogether.

Be willing to set a future date or deadline for continuing a disagreement in order to de-escalate emotions in the moment. We have more options than either fixing everything in the moment or ignoring problems forever.

Additional Commentary:

When asked for transparency, this server’s Admins acted as if mistakes had to be either ignored or turned into a big production. This left no room to acknowledge a mistake, learn, and move on, since that was neither ignoring the mistake nor treating it with sufficient drama.

11: Perfectionism

Belief that there is a single right way to accomplish something. Belief that individuals must implement only correct, successful actions (and that missteps and mistakes represent fundamental character flaws).

Examples:

Mistakes are seen as personal, i.e. they reflect badly on the person making them.

Making a mistake is confused with being a mistake; doing wrong is confused with being wrong.

Believing a problem can be permanently resolved with the correct or ‘perfect’ course of action.

Fixes:

Develop a community where the expectation is that everyone will make mistakes, but those mistakes are opportunities for learning, not value judgments.

Accept that, when faced with a systemic or deeply entrenched issues, community leaders will need time to address the problems.

They will probably need to try multiple ideas, some of which might not work. That’s okay; it does not have to be a failure if you learn from it and try again.

Additional Commentary:

In the case of this server’s implosion, perfectionism appeared with the Admins’ fixation on looking for a solution that would ‘put the matter to rest.’ They ignored or actively derided suggestions that did not ‘solve’ the problem in its entirety.

12: One Right Way

The belief that there is a particular correct or ideal way of doing this (and that fault lies with others for not following this particular correct way).

Examples:

Assuming that once people are introduced to the right way, they will ‘see the light’ and adopt it.

Believing that when one’s way is not working, the fault lies with everyone else for not ‘converting,’ not the method itself.

Related to perfectionism: believing there is a singular or permanent solution to on-going, systemic problems.

Believing only certain people are qualified to address or resolve problems. This is especially prevalent among people whose post-secondary education was mostly institutional (i.e. college).

Fixes:

Create a culture of support that recognizes how mistakes sometimes lead to positive results.

Challenge notions of what constitutes the "right way" and what defines a "mistake."

Catch our internalized assumptions about being ‘qualified’ to fix a problem on our own or take on a large responsibility.

Additional Commentary:

Once again, in the interests of living up to my own standards, that means admitting when I’m doing or did the very habits I’m castigating. While my intent was not to behave as if I thought there was One Right Way, I recognize that my actions had the same impact as if I did believe in One Right Way. I presented a solution (collection of rules, guides, and channels) from a server I owned in another fandom entirely, and implied that there was only one right way to ‘fix’ the server.

That said, their conduct in utilizing this also reflected Entitlement and Urgency (which is where I elaborated).

13: (Belief in) Objectivity

The belief that there is some neutral, unbiased experience or viewpoint a person can have.

Because patriarchy so often uses claims of emotionality to dismiss women, many women become oversensitive to claims of subjectivity or identity-based bias. This can make recognizing the invalidity of objectivity difficult in communities whose leadership is dominated by women, especially white women (as white men tend to be most likely to rely on accusations of excess emotion in the first place).

Examples:

Fixation on prioritizing facts over feelings, or thinking feelings can be disregarded and ignored.

Requiring people to think in a linear fashion or otherwise expecting others to perform only the type of logic validated by those in power.

Those in power get to be scared, hurt, or angry and still viewed as rational/logical, while marginalized people who are visibly scared, hurt, or angry are deemed irrational/illogical.

Refusal to acknowledge when a certain line of logic is covering an emotional bias, perspective, or agenda.

Fixes:

Own up to one’s subjectivity; instead of assuming that one can have some arch-neutral worldview, be clear about your background, experiences, and potential biases (whether you believe you actually have these biases or not).

Recognize your own worldview will be as subjective as everybody else’s. If your view of society is also part of the dominant view of society (e.x. if you are white and/or cis and/or male and/or…), this means you were probably conditioned to believe certain assumptions are objective when they are actually subjective.

There is no way to be human without being biased by one’s identity and experience; some identities are just so privileged or normalized by institutions that they are the “invisible” default or norm.

Get into the habit of trying to determine what a situation you are in looks like from the outside, what information others do and do not have, or getting diverse perspectives on various situations.

By “get into the habit,” I mean we should practice doing this even in situations without confrontation, crisis, or argument. Analyze successful incidents and events this way to get the practice for handling unsuccessful incidents and crises.

Utilize ‘I’ statements and make sure not to assume that your personal experience is the same as everyone else’s experiences.

Community leaders have to take extra special care with what we say about our communities and how we present our assumptions and experiences. When we claim a community is trustworthy or safe, we just make it even less trustworthy or safe for anyone feels otherwise, because this disconnect between our experiences (that we generalize) and theirs (that we individualize) creates a barrier against further feedback.

Additional Commentary:

This was also related to at least one admin struggling to disconnect their own experiences with everyone else’s experiences. To the admin, because so much of their own time was consumed by this discourse, they spoke and behaved as if this were consuming the entire server. They did not realize that most of the members of the server had nothing to do with this discourse, and many did not even know it was happening…until the admin started repeatedly utilizing @everyone. This implies the admin viewed their own experience as “objective” and thus projected their own experience onto everybody else.

VI. Validation Seeking

I called this collection of traits ‘validation seeking’ because they all trace back to appeals to external authorities or claims of external pressures.

14: Progress = More

Assuming solutions always require “more” of something; never considering that existing resources could be sufficient or that “less” might be a solution.

Examples:

Assuming the goal is always to grow membership, rather than maintaining an enjoyable community

Assuming that “more” will fix a problem (e.x. more moderators will fix a moderation problem)

Disregarding the costs of growth (such as how increased number of channels can make a community overwhelming to newcomers)

Valuing people who have achieved a certain milestone or objective metric of progress more than those who have not (e.x. valuing older members over younger ones, valuing college-educated members over those without college education, etc.)

Fixes:

Try to make sustainable decisions, with an aim not for endless growth but maintaining the actual goal of the community.

When pursuing “more” of something to solve a problem, first evaluate what you actually need and determine why the existing number of resources is no longer sufficient when it previously had been.

For example, are you actually pursuing more moderators because there is an increase in activity and the existing moderation team feels burnt out and falling behind? Or are you just assuming that you need more moderators regardless of activity levels?

15: Quantity Over Quality

Believing that only things that can be numerically measured have value (and that things which cannot be measured have little to no value).

Examples:

Fixation on things like number of members in a community (quantity) over the members’ relationships and experiences in said community (quality)

Treating quantified milestones as a goal in their own right, rather than means to an end or a guideline (e.x. acquiring a certain number of moderators or maintaining a certain number of channels in a server)

Discomfort with emotions and feelings (as they cannot be measured objectively)

Fixes:

Determine traits and practices important to your community which cannot be easily quantatively (safety, respect, mutualism, etc.) and think of ways to evaluate them (for example: open-ended questions in a survey instead of relying exclusively on numerical ratings or menu options)

Focus less on output goals and more on process goals, such as how many new ideas were considered or how many people felt fully heard in a meeting. Even if, in the short run, this feels like leading to a bunch of unproductive meetings, in the long run this creates a more robust decision-making process.

Treat ‘accountability’ not as a euphemism for punishment (which social media tends to do), but as an opening for receiving support.

Additional Commentary:

The admins fixated on obtaining more moderators, but the reality is that the problems facing the community did not need more moderators, but rather a shift in culture altogether - a thing which could have easily been engendered by the admins on their own, even without additional moderators.

16: Worshiping the Written Word

Fixation on knowledge provided by institutions over people’s lived experiences and on-going, dynamic realities.

This one is hard to recognize in virtual communities because most or all of our interactions are “written” in chats and social media.

Examples:

Attempting to use dictionary definitions of words as arguments in and of themselves or treating them as the end of an argument.

Refusing to acknowledge that the way people use a word in daily living may not match up to the institutional definition.

Using errors in spelling, grammar, or language to justify dismissing someone’s arguments.

Over-valuing people who can write well (or just write a lot), and undervaluing the contributions from people who rely on other media formats or informal documentation.

Fixes:

Treat encyclopedia articles and dictionary definitions as a conversation starter, not an argument ender, e.x. “This is my understanding of that word; what’s yours?” or “In what ways does this ‘official’ definition fall short?”

Focus less on using resources (articles, videos, guides, etc.) as an appeal to authority in an argument, and more as a starting point from which you develop your own community guidelines.

Additional Commentary:

I had an out-sized impact on discourse simply because I could write a lot in one go. Some of that was me anonymously relaying other people’s words on their behalf and some was original on my part; most of what I said simply reiterated what others had already conveyed. However, as I did so in a pseudo-academic manner, my word was given more weight.

Sharing of resources like educational articles or videos were treated as the end of a discussion, rather than the start of one.

17: Urgency

Applying extremely short deadlines to action, giving no time for rest or consideration. Utilizing the overarching urgency of racism as an excuse for short-sighted, short-term actions.

Examples:

Related to Quality Over Quantity: prioritizes measurable actions over impact.

Fixation on appearing to address racism moreso than actually doing it.

Uses expediency to justify poor-decision making processes or lack of consideration (related to Entitlement, Power Hoarding, and Conflict Aversion).

Often relies on perpetuating the idea that racism can be “solved” (which in turn implies that future accusations of racism cannot be made, nor community problems discussed).

Creating a culture of anxiety as people believe they must act immediately or they will never get to act at all.

Related to Right to Comfort: rushing decision-making in order to rush towards an idealized state of no further conflict.

Fixes:

When the feeling of urgency arises, slow down and encourage people pause, restate the goal, and dive deeper into alternatives.

Avoid making decisions under extreme pressure.

Work to distinguish what is actual pressure and what is pressure that you or others are creating.

Establish plans ahead of time for how decisions will be made during times of urgency, and how crises can be handled in the short-term while leaders evaluate ideas for long-term change.

This is related to Conflict Avoidance. When community leaders are uncomfortable with conflict, this also means not wanting to think about potential conflicts, and thus having no plans when conflict arises anyway. Becoming comfortable with conflict also allows planning for conflict management.

Additional Commentary:

When I showed the admins my fandom wank resolving set-up from another server (as mentioned in my additional commentary on One Right Way), they asked me if they could just use it as it was. However, they were too impatient to actually wait for an answer and used it, anyway, before I could respond. It was very clear that my answer never actually mattered to them. Had they waited, I would have explained how this exact set-up was not a good fit for this community and its current problems; I was sharing it assuming they would use it as a source of inspiration to brainstorm their own ideas for their own server. In addition, while I did not mind sharing, these were not my sole creation, but the product of a team of mods in my other server. Even if it had been a good fit, I would have checked with other mods whose labor had gone into this set-up to see if they were also alright with its wholesale reuse.

My experience is only one example. Ultimately, the admins kept fumbling, and increasingly claimed it was all due to the pressure and demands from the community that they ‘handle it’ - refusing to acknowledge that community members weren’t asking for an immediate solution to every problem. This urgency was self-inflicted. The server admins disregarded all their remaining mods’ suggestions that would have given them more time to address these problems carefully. Server-wide slow-downs, channel trimming, temporary server freeze, etc. - the admins had multiple ideas given to them, but shot them all down. The admins’ goal was not to address the problems, but to suppress discussions of racism as fast as possible because they were uncomfortable with admitting its existence in the first place (see Right to Comfort at the top).

Final Feelings

What Took Me So Long To Say Anything?

I didn’t want to risk the admins prematurely deleting the server out of spite. They were already unilaterally and suddenly taking away a community space from hundreds of fans entirely for their own benefit. I could not count on them being above robbing people the final opportunity to recover the last shreds of their materials and memories from the server.

I also, quite frankly, just had a lot going on in my offline life.

I continued to take my time even after they deleted the server because I was hurt and furious. I needed time to turn what was originally a soliloquy of my sorrows into an educational guide.

This was exacerbated by finding out that the admins faked the ‘death’ of the server:

As you can imagine, I was furious - and to be honest, I still am. That anger was precisely why I made myself slow down. I did not want to burn down the fandom for the sake of keeping only myself warm.

Complicated Feelings

I feel hurt and betrayed by the Admins and disappointed in the Inciting Incident Mod…but one thing I will say for them is that they expressed interest in learning the language and culture of the country that our fandom’s show came from.

They showed far more interest than that aforementioned Indigenous Server Member ever did.

I don’t begrudge this indigenous fan for defending their cultural tradition, nor their anger over how it was handled. I also acknowledge that in fandom and irl, Asian diaspora often end up partaking in white supremacy culture and entitlements. However, I do find this fan's umbrage at the initial ignorance to be tremendously hypocritical given this fan’s approach to Asian cultures, traditions, and histories. Their fanfics, server interactions, and other fanworks in this Asian media fandom demonstrated incredible disregard about Asian cultures - one which this fan never showed any interest in undoing or challenging.

I doubt it was a coincidence that this fan blocked me on Discord right around the time I started talking about the westernization of eastern characters and settings. Even if it was, that doesn’t lessen the pervasive apathy towards Asian culture in their fandom activities.

I routinely see fans call for the decolonization fandom when it comes to BIPOC people settings, only for these same fans to turn around and perpetuate the colonization of fandom when it comes to Asian people and settings.

This does not mean western fans shouldn’t participate in an eastern fandom! This participation is the best way to learn about a new culture. Mistakes and missteps are parts of the learning process, both at the individual level and at the collective level.

This is also not to pass a judgment on that specific fan or their creative works. That would be hypocritical of me in turn, given I’ve enjoyed some of those stories and fanworks, anyway.

I am bringing this up to demonstrate why solidarity is difficult for fans of color.

As an Asian diaspora fan in particular, I hate feeling like my choices are “BIPOC fans with ignorance and apathy that they don’t want to unpack” and “white fans with supremacy culture that they don’t want to unpack.” Either way, I’m going to have to put up with a ton of entitlement (never mind the rampant fetishization of Asians from all sides, which is its own can of worms I can’t even open right now).

And if I try to speak up about any of this, I will get blocked or I will be accused of being an anti-fandom killjoy.

Again.

Final Thoughts

People change for the better, and communities change for the better.

I know fandom can change because I’ve seen how it’s already changed. Fans take social justice issues and racial justice issues far more seriously than they did 20, 10, or even 5 years ago, and that’s just my own living memory of fandom.

We should always take a moment to recognize and celebrate how much better we are today than we were in the metaphorical yesterday.

But being better than yesterday does not mean being good enough for tomorrow.

And we still have a long way to go.

-

Thank you for reading this monstrously long post all the way to the end. Please remember to answer the poll at the top. Please reblog, and I encourage you to add your own experiences when you do.

[searchingforgravity]

Graceland Experience - PART 7

Fandom: Elvis/Elvis (2022)

Prompt: You have a conversation with Elvis which leads to something he doesn't expect.

TW: kissing, vomiting

Word Count: 1999

A/N: Ah the cliffhanger, there will be more in the next one though! It will be out soon!

You take a deep breath as you prepare to knock on his door. You waited until Sonny had to leave to go on an errand so you could talk to him alone. You raise your hand in a fist reaching to knock.

You can't do it.

Turning to go back to your room, the door to his bedroom opens. You spin back around and he stands there with his arms crossed, his eyebrow raised in inquiry.

"You need somethin' honey? Why are you lingering?"

"Um yes, I do."

There is a long beat as you just stand there looking at him. You feel completely paralyzed. Leaning against his door frame, he takes in your state, sensing your anxiety.

"Is something the matter?"

You swallow.

"Yes."

The palm of his hand travels to his face as he rubs his cheek. He hums, and you see a quick flicker of fear cross his face before he masks it. Another moment goes by as you two look at each other. He clears his throat.

"Well, I can't help you if you don't say anything, can I?" he sighs, feigning irritation but his voice is strained.

Tense.

You release a breath. It's now or never.

"You have my things," you try to say firmly, but it comes out in a whisper.

His face drains of color.

"Ah," he mutters softly.

It seems like he's been waiting for you to confront him about this.

"Yes, I do."

Oh God. Your stomach sinks and it takes all your strength to stay upright. You become light-headed as you try to swallow, but you can't.

"Come here, honey. Sit down," he sighs as he opens his door motioning over to a pair of chairs in the corner of his room.

You enter his room as he shuts the door.

"Elvis, I-what did you find?" your voice is panicked, but that is the last thing on your mind at the moment.

"Honey, just sit down and-" he starts but you cut him off.

"Elvis, if anyone else knows I-oh God, what's going to happen? What did you see?"

You can't catch your breath.

"(Y/N)! I'm not gonna say it again. Sit. Down."

Your eyes snap up to his at his insistence. You mutter out an 'okay' and you sit down.

"Good. Good," he sighs, his hand threading through his hair. "Now, I'm gonna need you to tell me I'm not crazy."

---

He lays it out in front of you, and you have to will yourself not to puke.

It's everything.

Your wallet, ID (with the year you were born and expiration date), even your cell phone. You are at a complete loss for words as you look up at him. His eyes connect with yours.

"Honey, I'm gonna need to to tell me I'm not crazy in about 2 seconds, because I'm this close to losin' my Goddamn mind," he breathes, fear in his voice.

"I don't know what to say."

It's a lame response, but it's the truth.

"What to say? What the hell is all this?!"

"Well...what does it look like?"

He steps back as he turns away from you, a laugh escaping him in disbelief as his hand comes to cover his mouth.

"No. That isn't possible," he mutters.

"Why do you think I freaked out when I woke up here! I didn't think it was either. I-."

You don't know what else to say. You look at Elvis and he looks unwell. He's as white as a ghost. He looks like he's going to- oh God. Running to the bathroom and grabbing his trash can as you hear him groan, sitting on one of the chairs. You get to him just in time as he hurls into the trash can, grasping onto your shoulder to keep from falling over. You have to steady yourself to keep from stumbling over.

"I was really hoping you would say it was a joke," he gasps after spitting in the trash.

You chuckle at the irony of the situation, deja vu hitting you hard as you were in this position not too long ago.

"I wish it was," you say sincerely.

He groans as you imagine his stomach turning.

"Honey, I'm sorry. I'm gonna need you to leave my room. I can't-" he starts, pausing, thinking.

"I'll talk to you later, I just can't do this right now."

Your heart sinks, although it frightened you to learn that he knew your secret, it is relieving to be able to share it with someone.

"Okay," you mutter, placing the can down in front of him.

He grabs your hand before you can get up from kneeling on the floor. A shock wave runs throughout your body as you look up at him.

"I'm really sorry honey, I just need to rest. I feel like- God I feel crazy," he apologizes, tears forming in the corners of his eyes.

You bring your free hand to hold his in both of yours, massaging his knuckles in small circles.

"I know, I'm sorry too, the feeling will pass. I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

You release his hand and walk to the door, opening it gently before closing it behind you. When you approach your room, you close it before going to your own chair, letting your face fall in your hands.

---

"Jer, can you pass over the salt," Elvis mumbles, avoiding eye contact with you as you look across the table at him.

It is tearing you up inside. It's been two days since you spoke to him in his room and he has been ignoring you ever since. He won't even look at you.

"Yeah, here you go, E," Jerry responds as he hands it over.

You pick at your food, you haven't had much of an appetite lately. Elvis has told everyone that he was feeling a little under the weather after you two spoke, and has barely left his room.

"Hey, (Y/N), I got you something while I was out and about yesterday, for your books," Sonny says, having learned your name when you told him and Jerry you remembered it.

You figured they couldn't do much with just a first name. Your attention is pulled away from Elvis' sullen face.

This grabs Elvis' attention too.

"Uh, it's not much but, well here ya go," he fumbles, holding out an intricate bookmark, with a beautiful swirling design of gold.

It's very nice. You take it from his hand.

"Thank you Sonny, this is very nice. I love it," you say, turning it over to see the same design on the back.

It's heavy, a metal bookmark, so it doesn't fade. You look up at him and his cheeks are rosy, a bashful grin on his face.

Oh. Oh.

"Well, I saw it and thought of ya. Thought you might like it," he muses before quickly going back to his meal.

Your cheeks flush as you tuck the bookmark under your leg. Does Sonny...like you?

You hear Elvis clear his throat and look up. Your eyes finally connect with his after two excruciating days of him acting like you don't exist. And his gaze is piercing through you. He looks pissed. He then glances over to Sonny who is smiling like he just won a million dollars. Suddenly, his chair scrapes against the floor. Everyone else turns their attention to him.

"I'm not feeling’ so well anymore. I'm goin' to my room," he mumbles, not breaking eye contact with you until he turns to trudge up the stairs.

"What crawled up his ass?," Sonny mumbles, as he looks back down to his breakfast.

You hum in acknowledgement as you wonder the same thing.

---

You sit up in bed pulling the covers over you in your room looking towards your closed door. It's about 10:30 P.M. and Elvis stayed in his room ever since breakfast. He didn't even come down for dinner. You want to knock on his door and speak with him, finally talk to him after two days of radio silence, but you feel like he wouldn't want that. You relax back into the chair as you open up Sound of Thunder again. You've read pretty far into the book and are getting into the part where the main character, Eckles, is learning the importance of the butterfly effect by his travel guide, Travis.

“All right,” Travis continued, “say we accidentally kill one mouse here. That means all the future families of this one particular mouse are destroyed, right?” “Right.” “And all the families of the families of the families of that one mouse! With a stamp of your foot, you annihilate first one, then a dozen, then a thousand, a million, a billion possible mice!”

Travis goes onto explain that just one simple action done in the past can alter the course of the world itself. You look back to your closed door. Could Elvis knowing about you change things? From him just knowing, would the course of history be affected? Your stomach starts to churn at the possibility. You hope not. You turn back to the book as your eyes start to get heavy.

---

You can't breathe. The hands around your neck are squeezing so tight you feel all the blood rush to your face. You try to yell out but you can't. You can't move. Elvis' eyes gleam as tears stream down his face, Salty droplets falling onto your own. You grab onto his hands, trying to will him to stop.

"Why are you back?! Why did you come back!" the shaky laboured breath calls from above you, but it sounds so far away.

Lurching up in bed, you scream. And scream. You clutch the sheets to your chest as labored breaths escape your lips. You are covered in sweat. Suddenly the door surges open. The light flicks on.

"What! What's goin' on?"

You expect to see Sonny on the other end of the door, but Elvis stands there, concern written all over his face. With the speed of which he arrives, it's as if he was already awake as he stands in just his pajama pants, no shirt.

You hide your face in the sheets.

"Stay away from me!"

It's the nightmare talking, you know, but your body is riddled with fear. You shake uncontrollably as sobs escape you.

"Hey," a gentle voice calls from beside you, a hand resting on your shoulder.

You shrink at the touch.

"Don't hurt me! I'll leave I promise, I just-"

"(Y/N) calm down, you're alright. I won't hurt you, baby. I won't hurt you," He whispers.

Then, hesitantly, he breathes, "Don't leave."

In the midst of your panic, your heart flutters.

You feel his hand thread through your hair as he pulls you into his arms, rocking back and forth.

"No one's gonna hurt you, sweet heart," he repeats, his lips coming to your forehead, lingering.

You cling to him as you try to calm your breathing. You then realize what position you're in. You are in his arms. His warm body encasing you.

"I'm sorry, I had a nightmare" you croak, starting to pull away from him.

The hand stroking your hair suddenly sinks deeper until it reaches your scalp. Before you know what's happening, you feel him draw your mouth to his, your lips connecting.

You're frozen. Your mind races. You feel him start to move his mouth on yours before realizing you aren't responding to the kiss.

He pulls away.

"Was that okay?" he whispers, in the softest, tenderest voice you've ever heard.

You don't respond, your mind is so jumbled, you don't know how to respond. You want to say yes, but your mind keeps going back to the book you fell asleep reading. the butterfly effect.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs, embarrassment in his voice as he moves to release you.

You grab his hand to keep him in place.

"I don't want you to leave."

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Tag List:

@horrorgirl4life @tantamount-treason @peaceloveelvis @sissylittlefeather @father-of-2cats @goldobsessionsworld @elvisalltheway101 @littlehoneyposts @atleastpleasetelephone @ccab @msamarican @presleyhearted

[dcafanzine]

☀️ Application Tips 🌙

Applying to a fanzine can be a pretty nerve-wracking experience, especially if this could potentially be your first zine! This set of tips has been made in the hopes of easing any potential anxiety and making the application process smoother for everyone!

Please read on to find out more and see some cute little puppets!

Read the FAQ and guidelines carefully

The FAQ and guidelines explain the theme of the zine as well as what we’re looking for when it comes to contributor applications. Reading these will help strengthen your application when you come to apply!

Make sure the zine schedule matches your availability

Please verify you’ll be able to keep up with the zine’s schedule if you’re selected to contribute a piece for the zine! For this zine, once selected, you’ll have about three months to complete your piece, with check-ins every month. Life happens, and unexpected things can make us all busy at the last moment (and our mods will try our very best to work with you to get things sorted!), but please be mindful when applying to check that your availability matches with the schedule.

Step one: Follow the guidelines carefully when submitting your application(s).

Please pay careful attention when reading and answering the application questions to ensure that your application follows the guidelines and answers everything as clearly as it can. Applications will stay open for a month - there’s no rush if you need time to complete your application in detail! If there is a maximum number of samples, a word count range, or a specific theme requested on the application form, please make sure your application adheres to these so we can properly evaluate your application. If you’re unsure about anything, please feel free to ask, as our mod team is only too happy to help!

Step two: Make sure we can see your samples.

Once contributor applications open, we’ll be asking to see existing samples of your work so we can see if you’re a good fit for the zine! Please be sure to link specific examples of your work that you think fit the zine’s theming as well as the style and quality level you’re hoping to meet when contributing to the zine. Bear in mind the mod team are likely going to be looking at a lot of entries, so if you link to a gallery that has a huge number of examples, we might not be able to give a fair amount of time looking at the pieces that best showcase your work! These don’t have to be posted publicly on social media, but please ensure we can see them for the duration of the application period (e.g., the links work, the links aren’t set to private or followers only, and the links don’t expire before the application period ends).

Step three: Make sure your application samples fit the theme of the zine.

In this case, we’re looking for examples of your work featuring the DCA. The zine will primarily focus on canon-adjacent depictions of the DCA, with some slots available for AU content made by the AU’s own creator or with express given permission from the creator of that AU. Your application should ideally provide one or more samples depicting the DCA, with at least one of those preferably depicting the DCA in a canon-adjacent form or setting.**Canon-adjacent here doesn’t mean the depiction has to be biblically accurate, just that the design should not differ so substantially from what would typically be recognised as the DCA to essentially be a separate character. This fandom is intensely creative and we love and applaud the originality of the many different variants of the DCA, but this zine aims to focus primarily on canon-adjacent depictions, with a limited number of slots for AU content as well. Having canon-adjacent depictions of the DCA will massively help round out your application for this zine!

Step four: This one’s for the merch artists - please don’t apply with the same samples you’d use for a page/spot artist application!

Including actual merch designs for your samples helps a lot, as prior experience making merch is a massive advantage for a merch artist application!

Bear in mind, you don’t strictly need to follow all of these steps to a tee when completing your application - the mod team will try to accommodate where we can. However, it will really help your application to take these things into consideration!

And most importantly …

Step five: If you get rejected this time, please don’t let it discourage you!

Zines often get a huge number of applications vs contributor spots, and a lot of tough decisions (often taking hours or even days) will likely have to be made between several really good applicants.

Being rejected from a zine in no way means you’re bad at what you do, or in any way less worthy or skilled than anyone else. You deserve to be here just as much as anyone else does, and there are people who adore what you do, so keep doing it! In some cases, certain applications might fit the theme of the zine better, particular applicants explained themselves more clearly in their application, or it was just all in all an extremely close call with one lucky winner. So please don’t ever let a rejection email discourage you from trying, and bear in mind rejection happens to the best of us at some point!

We appreciate every single application we get, so good luck out there!

[happy74827]

The Devil's Tango

{!!SPOILERS!! SEASON 4 EPISODES 1-6}

[Rhys Montrose x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: A certain professor is not very supportive of your relationship with the mayor-in-running.

WC: 2,741

Warnings: It's You... the show is warning enough.

The amount of people I see begging for an x reader of this man, and that no one had done it yet is actually hilarious. You would think after the first reveal, the whole fandom would jump at the sight of this man.

Though, realistically speaking, it's probably because he's one of those characters that are so hard to get right. Plus the fact that Part 2 didn't help in his favor at all.

I do plan to write more of him, so this is just a little tease if you will.

『••✎••』

“Hello, you.”

You jumped out of instinct, snapping your head towards the hoarse voice behind you. The chalk that you were currently using flew right out of your hand, soaring to hit the shadow that was now in front of you. Before it could hit your mystery stalker in the head, however, swift hands caught it just before impact.

“I… think you dropped this.” The sarcastic tone of an expired New Yorker made your fears fly away as your piece of chalk had. As you turned to meet the familiar brown eyes, you couldn’t help but give a slight smile.

“Oh, Jonathan,” You raised a hand to your chest, letting out chuckles in relief. “You scared me there, I wasn’t expecting anyone to visit at this hour.”

He stood in front of you blankly for a moment, as if someone had hit him with a “time freeze” superpower. You paid no mind to this of course, as it was a typical Jonathan Moore quirk. He clearly was very into his mind.

It almost reminded you of a certain… someone.

Jonathan snapped back to the present in no time with a soft, closed smile forming on his face. Within doing so, he handed you back your murderous chalk, before shoving his hands into the pockets of his trousers.

“Oh, no… no it’s totally my fault.” He apologized profusely, nudging his elbow towards the door. “The whole “not knocking” thing seems to be a nasty habit that only I can’t seem to get rid of.”

You nodded along to his apologies, despite already forgiving him the second you saw the familiar curls that fell down his forehead. It was pretty hard to hate the man that shared the same passion for poetry and was one of the professors that was teaching the same subject as you had.

“So, Jonathan,” you started, moving to lean your back against your desk. Your daily planner was down by your hips, along with the chalk. “What brings you to my classroom? Are you looking for some new recommendations?”

His face slightly faltered to the point where no normal, unobservant eye could witness it. The lip quiver, the slight wobbling of his left leg… they were all telltale signs of compressed emotions that an average joe wouldn’t think twice about — specifically, those who only knew the person on a surface level.

That wasn’t you, of course. You were observant to the point where it annoyed you. The constant paranoia that followed everyone’s movements practically ate you alive.

After a heap of silence, Jonathan sighed with his head facing downwards, his dark chocolate eyes refusing to look at you.

“It’s about Rhys Montrose.”

Your eyebrow raised in confusion at his words, your hands subconsciously resting on the desk, with your planner and chalk beside you. It was now you who had that blank daze.

“I…” You were absolutely speechless to the point where you could feel your jaw drop slightly. Jonathan knew Rhys? You’ve of course mentioned your relationship with Rhys to Jonathan himself, but you had no idea they had actually met. Honestly, you were still having a hard time believing that the nerd had met Lady Phoebe.

You straightened yourself, using your arms as leverage, as you looked at him with furrowed brows. “With how busy he constantly is now, I wasn’t even aware-“

“He’s not what you think he is.” Jonathan cut you off, his eyes shooting you to meet with yours. They were full of… worry?

“Jonathan, what are you—?“

His hands reached out to your shoulders, his body encasing you between himself and your desk. With every step he took closer to you, the more your eyes widened with confusion.

“You don’t know him, not like you think you do,” Jonathan whispered, “He’s a danger to society.”

You pulled his arms off of you, completely shocked by his tone. His phone buzzed as you looked at him bewildered, but he ignored his new text message. All he was focused on was you, just you.

“A danger to society? Jonathan, he’s just running for mayor.” You scoffed, turning back your attention to the chalkboard from before the librarian arrived. “You know, I didn’t take you for a man that’s into politics.”

“It’s not about fucking politics!” His hands slammed down on your desk. It caused you to jump, turning back towards the man only to find him mere inches from your face.

You tried to back away, but he pulled you right back in. “Jonathan—“

“You’re not listening!” His hands grabbed at your arms, his eyes darkened underneath the light you both stood under. “Rhys is a danger to society, he’s a danger to you.”

Jonathan continued to shake you and yell words into your ears, but everything around you went mute. The slightly muffled conversations from students down the hallways were silenced. You saw Jonathan’s lips moving, frantically, but you couldn’t hear. You didn’t want to hear.

“Jonathan, I think you need to leave.” You muttered to him coldly. It was a tone that would get anyone to stop and think, and he did just that. He paused, and it was then you gathered your strength and shoved him off of you for the final time. He stopped abruptly, his eyes questioning you.

He begged and pleaded with you to hear him out, but you refused. You refused to even glance in his direction. You were rarely an angry person, you usually kept it bottled up to come out in soft rants, but you were afraid if you said another word to Jonathan, you might just go ballistic to the point where you’d risk losing your valuable job, something you couldn’t afford to lose.

So, you told him to get out of your classroom once again and eventually he was forced to listen. He left when your familiar, upbeat students came pouring in one by one.

Despite the almost psychotic break dearest Jonathan had beforehand, class had gone rather smoothly for you. The students actually engaged with one another and focused completely on the short story at hand.

Not once had they gone off-topic. Then, of course, the devil shows up with a knock at your door, disrupting everything. It was one of the things you’ve hated the most, as you found it terribly rude, but your forgiving nature came into play when you realized it wasn’t the man you believed it to be. When you turned your head, it was Rhys who stood there with his hands crossed against his chest. He wore his signature suit and tie, which both complemented his figure and his eyes.

You gave him a slight smile in return, but the look he gave - the blue eyes devouring yours - had you following him outside the classroom rather immediately. You trusted your students enough to behave themselves.

Once outside the view of your students, Rhys gingerly wrapped his hand around your arm, guiding you to a secluded spot in the hallway that was sure not to draw attention. With Montrose's face being blasted everywhere as the mayor-in-running, it was hard finding privacy in public.

You were about to ask what it was that had him so upset to the point where he chased you down at work, but he beat you to it.

"Hello, darling," Rhys's voice sounded almost strained, tired even. It had been a while since you last saw him, not to mention that his friend Gemma had just recently become another victim of that so-called "Eat-The-Rich Killer," though Rhys had "admitted" that she wasn't his friend. If you recalled, he used the words, "Oh, piss off, you manky hypocrite" when he had last spoken with her. Still, the bags under his eyes suggested that he hadn't slept much the night before.

"Ah, nice to see you haven't changed your habits." Rhys covered his tiredness with a knowing smile as he gently leaned down to kiss the top of your head. "Maybe a psychology degree would be a better fit for you."

"Sorry," you apologized, looking slightly down. "It's just... not that I'm not glad to see that you're back, I really am, but are you okay? You look like you haven't slept for days, and you usually don't drop by the university unless there's a problem."

Rhys licked his lips, letting out a breathy laugh as he raised his hands to his hips. The tiredness in his eyes went away for a moment, resulting in him staring at you amusingly. A look that only took you a few seconds to realize you'd analyzed him once again.

You couldn't help but internally groan at yourself, but he only shot you another charming smile. It was one so enchanting that it made you swoon at the sight.

However, he eventually dropped that smile and sighed, caving into your concerns.

"I've had a long week," he confessed to you. "Oddly enough, I couldn't work my usual charm to get through to some... certain people, but I'm optimistic. Nothing a little persuasion won't fix."

"Me too, it's been a crazy morning." You agreed with a sigh. The incident with Jonathan within the previous hour was still fresh in your mind, haunting you to your core.

You never felt threatened by Jonathan, but as you recollected the scene, his body towering over yours with the desk blocking you from escaping. His arms held you, keeping you captive as he screamed about the man - the man who you loved with all your heart - wasn't the man you knew. That he was a façade, dishonest... an apparent danger to you.

Of course, you didn't believe Jonathan. You trusted Rhys with your life, but nothing about what Jonathan said sat right with you. He couldn't have known Rhys for more than six months, so why did he act as if he knew him better than you...

Rhys whispered your name, calling you back to face him. He was closer to you than he was before, with eyes that held his growing concern. As his hands gingerly reached out to caress your shoulders, you wanted to tease him about how he was now the observer, but you stayed quiet.

He didn't like that.

"Darling, what is it?" he pushed softly, his accent adding gentleness to his tone, "What happened?"

"It was… really odd," you muttered, your mind flicking back to your classroom, the way Jonathan's hands slammed down on the desk with sudden rage, how badly it made your heart skip a beat. "My coworker, Jonathan, he—"

Rhys cut you off. "You said, Jonathan?"

"Yes," you nodded.

"As in… Jonathan Moore?”

Huh, it seemed Jonathan wasn't lying to you about it after all. They really do know each other. The more you thought about it, however, made you wonder why Rhys never told you about him. He must have known you both worked in the same building.

You nodded to his question once again, lowering your eyes down toward the glassy floor beneath you. You didn't have to look at Rhys to know he was listening intently.

"Usually, Jonathan comes in to give or receive book recommendations, but today he was acting… really off," you glanced back up at him, as you began to quiver. "He was stating things about you, and shouting at me, and I… I don't know. It really threw me in for a loop."

Rhys' head snapped up at you like a lightning strike. His eyes no longer contained the concern he had held before. They darkened, as well as his voice.

"What did he say to you?"

"Something about how you were a danger to society, and apparently a danger to me," you shivered at the memory. "He shouted a lot of things really, but I canceled out the majority of them and threw him out, metaphorically of course."

Rhys mumbled under his breath. Unfortunately, it was something you couldn't quite pick up on. The only thing you could do was watch as he sucked on his tongue, making a face as though he was eating sour candy, before glancing up to meet your eyes again.

You stayed quiet, observing his newfound attitude. His jaw was clenched, with arms shifting towards the wall to encase you within them before letting his head fall and lean into you. He practically did what Jonathan did but with the wall instead of your desk, and despite the similarities, you weren't scared of Rhys. His eyes fluttered closed with his — now loosened tie — dangling out in front of you. His lips were only inches away from the base of your neck, and you couldn't help but take in his signature scent of grounded coffee grinds.

"Rhys," you whispered softly towards him, ruffling up his short hair slightly. He let out another sigh that unclenched his jaw and pushed himself closer to you. You couldn't help but notice how relieved he now seemed, letting out gentle, smooth huffs of air to take in the moment.

Unfortunately, as much as you'd like to stay like this — being you haven't had him for a week — you still had a class to teach. Regrettably, you forced yourself to peel away from his arms, whispering short apologies and promises to see him later.

You didn't look back as you retreated back to your classroom. Upon returning to your desk, you turned to see that every single one of your students either gave you a smirk or a knowing nod, and you couldn't help but threaten them with a pop quiz that you were positive they weren't prepared for. As expected, it shut them right the hell up.

Ah, the power of being a professor.

———

When Jonathan arrived home that night with his now empty red takeout bag, he couldn’t help but sense the feeling that he was being watched. His feeling turned out to be correct when he went to unlock the door of his apartment, only to find it already unlocked.

The professor froze momentarily, hesitating whether he should enter unarmed or retrieve a nearby weapon. But being in sight of absolutely nothing, he had no choice but to grudgingly step inside.

As expected, when closing the door behind him, the lights of his living room flickered on and within the light revealed the man he most desperately wanted to kill.

The unwelcome man sat on his chair like he owned the place. A martini resided in his hand as he gave a sarcastic smile. The yellow light mixed in with the fiery flames of the fireplace reflected the same unnerving expression.

“Hello, Professor Moore,” the man spoke with amusement as he turned to face the bearded killer. His accent had the falsified name rolled off in a tease.

The owner rolled his eyes as he dropped the bag he held down at his feet. His keys were put safely back into his pocket. He should’ve known this would happen.

“Despite how much I would love to carve out your marvelous attractive eyes,” the man stood up, swirling the drink in his hand as he approached the professor. “I have to admit, Joe, I underestimated your intelligence. I knew you were smart, since the very beginning mind you, but this was just… impressive.”

Joe ground his teeth. “What do you want with me, Rhys? Why are you even here?”

“Two things, really,” Rhys smacked his lips together, nodding his head as he looked down for dramatic effect. When he glanced back up at the professor, his amusing smile was gone. His hand stopped swirling the martini, keeping it eerily still, and his eyes darkened almost instantly.

“Remember what we talked about, Joe, with the replacement. I want it done within twenty-four hours. If not, as I said earlier, you’ll be going down for everything.”

Joe’s breath hitched as Rhys stalked closer to his body. The piercing blue eyes caused the professor to freeze in his thoughts, forcing him to watch for Rhys’ unpredictability.

“And if you ever come near my girl again,” his voice was ghostly, sending chills throughout Joe’s entire body. “I’ll be the one who throws your ass in the cage.”

As if he were a light switch, Rhys pulled his lips into a grin within seconds. In a calm manner, he forced his half-sipped martini into the professor’s hands before seeking himself out.

For the first time in a long time, Joe Goldberg felt uneasy.

*Rhys x reader being nonexistent on Tumblr*

Me:

[purpleqilinwrites]

first.

a/n: these days have been feeling yucky to me (unrelated to fandom), so i wrote a little nanami thing to cheer myself up.

fandom: jujutsu kaisen

character: nanami kento

genre: fluff

info: established relationship (nanami is your husband); reader is also a jujutsu tech alumnus

warnings: high school dumbassery

synopsis: allegedly, gojou was your first kiss. allegedly.

word count: 1.3k

Nanami Kento

"Can I help you?" you asked, your smile evident in your tone as you looked at Nanami from over the novel in your hands.

There was a certain sullenness that knitted his brows together, one you recognised as being a symptom of having a few too many necessary interactions with a certain white-haired sorcerer. Nanami slumped backwards into the armchair, running a hand down his face with a tired sigh. You chuckled lightly to yourself as you waited for him to speak, eyes fixed on the words on the page in front of you but not reading any of them.

"Gojou-san said something to me as I was leaving the school, and I'd like you to confirm or deny it," Nanami said, finally.

You let out a thoughtful hum, slotting an expired stamp card into your novel before closing it and leaving it on the coffee table. "And what did he say?" you asked, feeling the beginnings of a strain in your cheeks as your smile widened, anticipating.

Gojou did say the damnedest things sometimes.

Nanami groaned, his hand immediately going to his already loosened tie to tug it off his neck. The collar of his dress shirt fell open in the absence of the tie, and you allowed yourself to be distracted by his Adam's apple for a second before bringing your attention back to the increasingly interesting conversation you were having.

"Before I say anything else, I want you to know that I'm asking purely for curiosity's sake."

You nodded along, urging him to continue. He let out a long exhale as a means of pause, and you mirrored the break in his words to settle into a more comfortable position on the couch, still anticipating.

Nanami was uncharacteristically hesitant with his words, as though he was rephrasing himself several times before anything could leave his tongue. When your husband was like this, it brought to remembrance a younger version of him who tended to cut himself off in the middle of sentences because he wasn't satisfied with how his thoughts came out. He had always been more careful when he was speaking to you.

You mentally put aside a reminder to buy some kikufuku for the sole purpose of eating the whole box in front of Gojou and not sharing. If you felt particularly devious when the day came, you could always flick some of the rice flour left at the bottom of the box at him. Maybe leave a suspicious white handprint or two on his back for his students to pester him about.

"Of course," you said, still smiling, still waiting. "But please, just say what's on your mind. I don't think I can take much more of this mystery."

"Gojou-san seemed to be under the impression that he was your first kiss. He said—"

You couldn't contain the violent cackling that boiled over your lips, slapping your hands on your thighs and folding over in your seat. "I'm-I'm sorry! Hah! Please— Go on," you said, your words coming out in pieces as you tried to stop laughing long enough to hear Nanami out.

He sighed at the sight of you misty-eyed and happy, a fond smile pulling on his lips.

While you busied yourself with wiping your tears on the ends of your sleeves, Nanami stood and stepped around the coffee table to sit beside you. You moved to swing your legs over his lap when you felt the couch dip with the addition of his weight, scooting close enough to prop your cheek on his shoulder. His hand naturally came to rest on your hip, and he leaned in to press a few kisses into your hair.

"That's what you wanted to know?" you asked, eyes bright and still slightly out of breath.

Nanami regarded your face for a moment, silently admiring you. His other hand came to cup your jaw and you obliged him, your mouth pliant against the insistent press of his.

"Is it true?" came your husband's voice, his breath warm on your face. You shook your head, chasing his lips and relishing how they curved into a smile against yours.

"But I did kiss Gojou once," you said, breaking the string of saliva with your finger as you reclined into the backrest of the couch. The pleased expression on Nanami's face immediately soured terribly. He motioned for you to elaborate before placing a hand on your thigh, squeezing lightly.

"It was in the first year of high school, sometime at the beginning of the school year," you started, laughing when Nanami's eyebrows shot up. "My first kiss was actually Shouko. After, I kissed Getou and then Gojou. All on the same day."

The pinch of his lips told you that he was still processing this revelation, so you waited. It was a lot to process even for you, when you suddenly remembered it when the school year came to an end. Three people you kissed in one day, simply because Gojou hounded the rest of you to "live life a little".

You idly smoothed the palm of your hand over the muscular plane of Nanami's chest, feeling the steady rise and fall of it as he breathed.

"You kissed all of your classmates? And on the same day?" he asked, incredulous. You nodded to both questions, your smile turning sheepish. Nanami's hand on your thigh squeezed again, more firmly this time, as if there was some written confirmation in your skin about the time you kissed three other people who weren't him.

"Tell me how it happened."

You blinked.

"Are you disappointed?" you asked, already looping your arms around Nanami's torso and tucking your head under his chin, an offering. He dropped a kiss into your hair and let his lips linger there, a quiet reminder that you never needed to fear him harbouring such feelings against you.

If anything, he was disappointed in all three of your classmates for whatever transpired in those early months of your time in Jujutsu Tech. In Ieiri, Getou, and especially Gojou.

"No matter what, I love you, remember?" was the promise that he whispered into your hair, a reprise of the firm promise he gave you on your wedding day.

You giggled, repeating the words into his collarbone. It tickled him, both the feeling of your breath on his exposed skin and the assurance that you felt loved in his arms.

"Gojou started it," you said, and it made perfect sense. Nanami had suspected as much when he first heard the words from Gojou's lips. Of course, it was his upperclassman's fault. "He was convinced that having a 'kiss fest', as he called it, would be a good bonding experience for everyone. Like it was something normal to do in high school."

You left room for him to ask questions, knowing him and knowing that he'd definitely want to know more. Mentally, you replayed the whole 'kiss fest' and everything that led up to it, catching yourself by surprise with how crisp some of the details were in your mind's eye. It was a thing that you happened to participate in while you were in high school, completely uneventful and entirely disregarded.

After all, the best part of your high school years was meeting your husband. Everything else was just happenstance, smooth rocks that marked out the road that led to him.

"Did you enjoy it?" was the question that pulled you from your reminiscing.

You put your finger to your chin in thought. "Based on what? Like, taste or something?" you asked, drawing a blank when you pondered how best to answer the question posed to you. You knew when it came to him there was no wrong way to say things. It was more that you wanted to properly convey how little those three kisses meant to you.

It was Nanami's turn to laugh, the sound warm and inviting you to do the same. You brushed away the stray golden strands falling in his face, taking in the handsome image before you and committing it to memory.

[cursedcrazy-starkid]

Little detail in NPMD that’s living rent free in my mind (spoilers ahead!)

I know the fandom has been obsessing over figuring out the lyrics to everyone’s favorite chaotic™️ scene but I wanna acknowledge something in the choreography that caught my attention💃🏻

Okay so first off MASSIVE PROPS to Lauren for choreographing this so amazingly. If you pay close attention you’ll notice that each of the Lords in Black has their own cute little 8 count dance related to their character (some more clear than others).

Pokey💙

switching back and forth between his hand and the mask (I’m assuming representing him wanting to block out every voice that’s not his own).

Nibbly💗

need I explain???

Wiggly💚

I’m assuming the arm motions are supposed to represent his tentacles

Blinky💜

also self-explanatory

Tinky💛

… okay honestly this one tripped me up but it fits the vibe

Okay so this alone was a cool discovery, but THEN I noticed that the Lords in Black cycled through each other’s choreography throughout the scene. After a million watches that I absolutely don’t regret I’m pretty sure I figured out the pattern to be: Wiggly➡️Tinky➡️Nibbly➡️Blinky➡️Pokey🔁 in a looping order. There were a few discrepancies in this pattern (I think possibly either due to choreography mistakes or maybe it was just to make the choreography look more symmetrical?) but this was the order that most commonly persisted:

Anything in parenthesis is what I think they were supposed to do because it’s a simple switch that fits the pattern (Corey never did Tinky’s dance but did Nibbly’s for 2 cycles, Lauren had Nibbly and Tinky’s reversed).

Anyway this may already be a thing because I definitely need to get caught up on Hatchetfield lore but I’m wondering if there’s any significance to this order?

It almost matches the order that we were introduced to the Lords in Black in (Blinky being the one out of place):

Wiggly (Black Friday)

Blinky (Watcherworld. NMT Season 1, episode 1 part 2)

Tinky (Time Bastard. NMT Season 1, episode 2 part 2)

Nibbly (Honey Queen. NMT Season 2, episode 1)

Pokey (Yellow Jacket. NMT Season 2, episode 4).

It almost matches reverse order to when we were first introduced to all of the dolls in The Witch in the Web: Pokey➡️Blinky➡️Tinky➡️Nibbly➡️Wiggly. Nibbly and Tinky are reversed, which could maybe be connected to Lauren reversing their dances in the order but I feel like that’s too far of a reach:

It also almost matches the order that the names are read from in the black book (again reverse order and Nibbly and Tinky are switched):

^creds to whoever typed out the script cause my digital ticket expired by the time I realized I wanted to double check this

It makes sense that invoking the names ends with Wiggly since it’s been implied at multiple times that he is the most powerful and terrible of the Lords in Black but other than that I’m clueless.

One moment that perfectly matches the pattern in the dance if you reverse it is the one real picture we have of the dolls from Nick’s Twitter:

If you start with any of them and go backwards it matches the (most consistent) pattern from the dance perfectly: Nibbly⬅️Tinky⬅️Wiggly⬅️Pokey⬅️Blinky

There’s more stuff that shows up in the choreography throughout the dance that intrigued me but this post is already way too long and I’m guessing with my luck there’s probably 0 significance to the order that the dances were done in buuuut yeah I’m driving myself insane on this so if anyone has any insight let me know!

Nerdy prudes must die🤪

[margareth-lv]

A question about the “C/T at a table” pic you posted…

Not sure if you were here back when this happened in real-time, but do you (or anyone else) remember what that lady’s name was that took the pic of C & T at the restaurant table?

I remember she claimed she was a writer/journalist/marketing professional, and soon after the incident started replying to posts from her Tumblr account too (named something related to army wife life, I think). I also remember her son really went overboard rage-responding to IG(?) comments and calling everyone who thought it was a setup a, “crazy c*nt” (or something close to that), lol.

You can see her last name on the computer in the pic, Macnaughton. Was Christine the first name? That whole episode was bonkers (one of many stupid moments in this whole saga).

I want to see if she’s still around and if the NDA has expired yet. :)

————————————— Dearest Gentle Anon,

I have to say, you sent me the question in an oddly graphic form (how did you manage that?), but I'm more than happy to give you a detailed answer. I’ve been blogging on Tumblr since March 2021. Admittedly, my initial activity here could hardly be called ‘writing’, as it was mainly reblogging, but by the time I joined the fandom, everything was already 'done', except for the unexpected appearance of The Little Soul in August 2021. So the ‘Hare Picture’ that was shared in May 2019 was already on the table here before my arrival. It seems you know a lot more about this photo (and probably a lot more besides) than I do. And yes, the photo we're discussing can still be found on Instagram. The account belongs to Clare Macnaughton, a writer and blogger who goes by @mrsmacnaughty on the platform.

You’re right – you can see her name written in the bottom left corner of the photo on the computer monitor. I hadn't noticed that before, so thank you for pointing it out. So yes, this photo is still available on Instagram, unlike the other post, shared in January 2018 by MELISSA HOYER [Pop Culture. Commentator. Collaborator. Consultant. Talker. Travel. Lifestyle. News. Fashion] ⬇️⬇️⬇️

*** *** *** Isn't it odd that this 'engagement' post has disappeared? 🤔 So my conclusion is that... It's always been part of the unprofessional activities of STARZ's PR department that the Strong Women Actively Present on Instagram were included to create the Narrative. In particular, they were used to announce to the public the milestones in Caitríona Balfe's ‘love life’.

It all seems really genuine and from the heart.

[25 June, 2024]

[missionel]

a decent amount of people expressed interest in a tmbg discord server, so i made one! i don't really have any guidelines for people joining at the moment, since the people in this fandom seem pretty tame :]

so... come and Join Us :)

the invite expires in a week, so if you're seeing this after that feel free to ask for a new link

[ghostinspecter]

Since this is my hazbin blog I figured I should take a moment to promote the StaticMoth/Voxval server that was just created! 📺🦋

The server is 18+. No ship hate or harassment is allowed - you can check out our rules for more information. Come join the fun, share your art, writing, any creative wips or just hang out to talk about our favorite trashlords. It's a small server and we're only 5 people so far.

The invite link down below will expire after 7 days. If you find it to be expired you can dm me for another one!

This message has been sponsored by VOXTEK - Trust us with YOUR fandom experience ✨✨✨

[katy-133]

Whose Skeleton Is Who? (TF2 Comic #7 Preview)

Regarding the issue 7 preview for the Team Fortress 2 comic, I know I joked a while ago that we as a fandom are trying to figure out which skeleton is which merc like we're reading and analysing that one page from The Castle of Fear by Patrick Burston all over again, but I wanted to take a moment to actually go through each skeleton and tell you the observations I've made, since I've noticed others' interpretations have sometimes been different, which I think is very interesting as someone who likes to compare art interpretations for fun.

Team Fortress 2 pays attention to art principles like colour theory, strong silhouettes, and invoking art history, and that also includes the comics, not just the games, and invites you to draw parallels between things.

So without further ado...

Miss Pauling ^

The preview script we get to read notes that the first skeleton we see (before the wide shot) is Miss Pauling's skeleton, which is in a crawling pose. It's meant to parallel a pose she does with a group of other vultures in an earlier part of the comic:

(Image: Comic issue 6, The Naked and the Dead)

Script transcript of the image below:

PANEL 2 We pull back to reveal a SKELETON, half-baked from years of wind-blown sand. The skeleton looks like it was crawling AWAY from something. It lifts a single skeleton hand out to nothing. VULTURES lurk. Let's try as best we can to mirror the position of the body and vultures from the opening of Issue #6, so it's clear we're insinuating this is MISS PAULING.

(Image: Script preview by writer Jay Pinkerton)

Additionally, her skeleton has two vultures above it, squabbling at each other (I assume over who gets to eat the skeleton marrow), which parallels Redmond and Blutard (the owners of RED and BLU, respectively) fighting each other over land and Miss Pauling "playing both sides" by pretending to only work for one of them.

Scout ^

The skeleton is in a running pose, representing Scout being characterised as the faster runner. The skeleton also has a brown shoe, similar to a pair Scout wears in Expiration Date to impress Miss Pauling.

(Right image, above: TF2 Official Wiki, Argyle Ace)

Soldier ^

The skeleton has the right arm up, similar to Soldier's pose when he's carrying his rocket launcher.

(Right image, above: TF2 Official Wiki, Soldier)

Pyro ^

The skeleton with the missing hip bones (or are hidden in some way by the sand and tree branches). In anatomy, the hip bones are one of the easiest ways to identify the sex of an adult skeleton (owing to the width of the hips being different if there is a birth canal). Pyro is gender ambiguous. The legs are also crossed, which is seen as more feminine body language when a person is sitting. This matches Pyro's body language, since Pyro's canonically done foot popping (a term coined by The Princess Diaries) which is associated with women film stars during the Golden Age of Hollywood.

(Image: The Jungle Inferno Update, Day 3)

Demoman ^

The vulture is pecking out the left eye socket of the skeleton, which is the eye socket that Demoman got cursed upon by reading the Bombinomicon. This creates a kinda visual parallel to Prometheus from Greek myth being cursed to have a bird of prey (an eagle) feast upon him as punishment for giving the forbidden knowledge of fire to humanity.

(Image: Bombinomicon comic)

The left leg is also missing at the knee, or majorly separated from the rest of the body, and Demoman can have a peg leg on his left side in the game:

(Image, above: Weapon Demonstration: Bootlegger, video by OfficialTF2Wiki)

Heavy ^

The skeleton with the largest ribcage, fitting Heavy's body silhouette. The skeleton also dwarfs the skeleton to the right of it, which invokes Heavy's size compared to the other mercs (he's the tallest merc in a lineup).

Engineer ^

The shortest skeleton. Note that the forearms are either missing or hidden in the sand, which invokes the image of Engineer being an amputee (missing his right arm at the forearm) and being the shortest merc when they're all A-posing. The skeleton is also wearing boots, which Engineer wears.

(Image: Reddit post titled, anyone else surprised that Scout isn't the shortest Merc? by Ok-Mastodon2016)

Medic ^

The tall skeleton that has the vulture with its beak poised over the skeleton's heart. Medic surgically removed and replaced each of their hearts, which allows them to be Ubercharged.

(Image: Meet the Medic video by Valve)

Sniper ^

The skeleton with its back lifted up by a stone, creating a visual focus towards it. The vulture is standing over the skeleton, as if it had been pecking at the skeleton's back. This could parallel being backstabbed, and I'm deducing the skeleton as Sniper's because his class is designed to counter Spy, who is the class who does backstabs. This skeleton also has brown shoes, which could be Spy's, but could also be Sniper's if he wears shoes instead of (what I had assumed before were) boots. Another vulture watches over the scene, perched on a higher ledge of rock and focused on that skeleton. Similar to how Sniper likes to climb up trees and higher ground to have a vantage point to scope areas.

Spy ^

The skeleton with a hole through the skull. This looks like a bullet wound from a headshot by a Sniper (again, Sniper and Spy are counter classes to each other).

I know this scene could be a bait and switch and that these aren't the mercs. I actually assume that's what the context is--otherwise, it'd be a pretty upsetting comic! But I think it's neat that the writers and artists went out of their way to make each skeleton characterised like this. The attention to detail is amazing, even in just this one page preview!

[outrunningthedark]

It seems to me neither Tim nor the other writers know who Eddie is beyond the single dad with the dead wife and Buddie. I love Eddie, he's a fantastic character but it seems no one knows what to do with him because they built his whole identity around his marriage and his best friend and now they don't know how else to write him

Gonna cosign something I've seen @unfuckablebogtroll mention in recent days. As much as 911 fandom loves to talk about story lines that could happen in season 9, 10, and beyond, we're seeing what happens when networks allow prime time dramas to extend beyond an obvious expiration date just for the sake of claiming the #1 demo on a given night. We've gotten insight into Eddie's marriage and what brought him to LA as a single dad. We watched his (estranged) wife die literally right in front of him. We saw how he handled the initial grief and disbelief via the fighting arc. But we also saw him bounce back and end the season in a better place. Season four brought us Eddie finally attempting to date again. Eddie gets shot on the job. Eddie recovers (physically). Season five? Covered A LOT of ground. Eddie breaks up with Ana, gets held hostage (to add to the PTSD arc later), decides to quit the 118, starts a new job with dispatch, has his breakdown, finds himself on the road to recovery, and finally gets the all clear to go back to the firehouse. And don't forget season five was when Eddie started mending things with his father, too. Last year was not as Eddie-centric, but we still got a couple more scenes of Eddie in Dad Mode - without Buck's help - and a little background on his family (Isabel trying to speak to her husband after he passed through a "healer" and how it turned Eddie into a skeptic because of all the money she lost) before the (albeit rushed) dating arc that led to calling Marisol in the finale. And now it's season seven. Tim doesn't want Marisol to be endgame, but keeping Eddie single for the majority of the season wasn't gonna move anything along, so what's the quick fix? Reintroducing unresolved feelings about Shannon via Kim despite season six already moving past that (which is why having two show runners at two different times was never going to work as far as consistency is concerned). Which brings us to...this very moment. I would assume the Shannon plot isn't fully finished unless the hiatus is going to motivate everyone to skip right over the steps Eddie takes to adjust to his new lifestyle, but even so, when that part of his story is complete (again)? Where do they go from here? What's left? (They don't seem to know.)

[destiel-wings]

Did I miss Misha originally say Cas’s confession was platonic?

I don't think Misha ever said that. For as much as i know he was on the main team with Bobo Berens to actively fight to have the confession happen, so he definitely never thought it was platonic. He's always been quite vocal about how non platonic it was actually, like when in Italy the "I love you" was dubbed with the platonic version of it, "ti voglio bene" (instead of "ti amo", which is the romantic equivalent) he posted a video to criticize that embarrassing decision.

I think there's been a moment, right after the first spn conventions after the finale, when the first fan questions about the confession happened and extremely embarrassing replies were given by certain actors (I'm talking about the infamous reply that Jared gave to a fan asking about it), Misha got really upset (not at Jared, i mean, in general, because apparently even after the confession canonically happened IN THE SHOW, they still weren't allowed to talk about it, or about destiel as an actual thing), and so he may have been quite frustrated for a while, not expressing himself quite as strongly ad he did at first.

But I'm seeing the latest few cons that happened, mainly the latest two jibs, and all the amazing jenmish content we got in their panels together, and how slightly easier it's become for them to talk about it... i mean Jensen and Misha wrote a destiel song on the spot a week ago at the jib11, and Jensen said he would love to see the confession being adressed "maybe we will get to see that soon" and I'm being more hopeful.

And so Misha has been quite more at ease bringing it up again too, like this is another reply he gave last week at jib11:

The thing about destiel is, I think the people in power never wanted it to happen because they thought they would lose viewers and thus, money, tainting the franchise. I think most of the writers tried to slip it in anyway, through the subtext, and they were always allowed it to a certain extent because it worked, and it placed the show in a certain limbo where destiel was basically Schrodinger's cat. It was there and wasn't at the same time. The confession was fought for and i think the peole who cared about it did whatever they could, but still, they couldn't get a complete win since the ones in charge still refused to let Dean reciprocate. So that must've been extremely frustrating for Misha too, because he's one of the ones that really cared for it, and understood just how meaningful it was to many people, and the power it had, and it might have had if brough to completion.

I think Jensen went on board too, somewhere along the way, and he changed his mind for the better. Like, i still think that to him, Dean is probably straight, but he's been way more open recently (ever since the confession, and probably during season 15 too, since the moment he knew the story was going to lead there) and probably after seeing the impact it had, the fandom's reaction to it and the finale, he probably understood just how much it would mean to so many people. So even though he may definitely have a preference for Dean being straight IF THE NETWORK ALLOWED IT i really don't think he would be against a canonically bi Dean. Not anymore. I think he might actually go for it. For the fans.

And i think he's had talks with Misha about it.

But what i mostly mean when I say "it's become slightly easier for them to talk about it" is they have more room to do it, because either their NDAs are about to expire or Jensen buying the rights to the story gives him more power to disclose things and talk more freely. Please take all these words with a grain of salt because i don't work in the industry and these are just my personal speculations, but i think the main problem and cause of frustration with talking about destiel publicly for any of the actors has always been contractual. The show didn't officially take a position (denying Dean the reciprocation) and so all the public statements and opinions of the actors needed to contractually adhere to the "company line" (which i think may *only partially* explain Jared's infamous rant, as a horrendously clumsy attempt to avoid confirmation of destiel - note that I'm not justifying it).

Of course, the enraging thing is that while Dean's reciprocation is canonically up to discussion and subject to interpretation, Castiel's is not. So Misha has always been one of the few to be freer to talk about that specific moment, because Castiel's journey took a clearer stand.

But even that has been buried or blurred down to "interpretation" very often by others, taking another time a huge step back, to favor the colossal hiding of destiel and not risk a blatant confirmation from the show, officially, on both sides. So if Misha ever said anything about it being platonic (which i don't think he did), he was probably just ranting it out in extreme frustration or reciting it as a company line to survive from the snipers of the CW (just as the rest of the actors).

***

That's how i see it anyway. Sorry i went a little overboard with my reply, and brought up Jensen in the discourse too, but hopefully that answers it! :)

[corvidiss]

Greetings, Dirk Gently fandom; I bring you great news! A saviour has been born!

Introducing: a searchable DGHDA scene index!

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What is it?

It's a way to categorise and search for every single scene in the show.

You can sort by character, tone, season, activity level, etc, and the spreadsheet will automatically give you all the scenes that match your search with a link to their start and end times on YouTube!

Why?

The original intention of this was for fic writers – as the writing equivalent of a folder of reference images. But it has as many applications as you can think of for it!

How?

Four days of me hyperfocusing on spreadsheet formulae. Worth it.

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But!!! There's a Problem!

See, I've set the whole thing up, with formatting and formulae and so on – but, at present, there isn't actually anything in it.

There's something like 900 scenes in the whole show.

So: I'm asking for your help!

I've got a document linked below explaining everything involved, but in short: if we produce a community effort and divide the episodes between us, the whole thing will be filled out and functional much more quickly!

There's no pressure to do anything you don't feel up for, so don't feel like you have to input loads to take part! And if you don't take part at all for any reason, that's also completely fine. Your presence in the fandom is always enough <3

If you do feel up for anything, your help will be greatly appreciated!!

Interested? Read the document and get in touch!!

The Guide Document:

The Spreadsheet:

(The sheet is view-only at the moment for safety. Read the document and get in touch with me if you'd like to help out!)

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P.S. We've got an active DGHDA discord server if you'd like to hang out and discuss anything DGHDA related! The guys there have been vital to this spreadsheet's production so far, and are wonderful to be around; come join us if you want to! Here's the link - DM me somewhere if it's expired!