#excuse me while i cry scream and everything in between

[hereforthehitsbaby]

Heyoooo, i just read your say it louder and im in love with that so much like holy, so i was wondering if you could make something kinda similar or something? like maybe logans chasing reader because she stole his cigars and they have a cute moment or something along those lines, maybe end a bit with or with smut? thanks so much babes!

Mine Now | DOFP!Logan Howlett x F!Reader

Warnings: Primal!Logan, Scent Tracking, Shotgunning His Cigar, Marking, Implied Smut, Reader is a Mutant who has invisibility, Enemies to Lovers because I’m a sucker for pain, Takes place at the very end of DOPF when Logan comes back to the future, Pain Kink, Breathing Play, Choking, Claws come out – I repeat the claws come out,

Rating: R – No Minors

Word Count: 4.5K

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for your request! This was a blast to write and honestly? It gave me a good excuse to write for DOFP!Logan! I adore you! 😊 Also completely unrelated side note….you did say you wanted smut, right??? Because I may, or may not, have spaced you said cutesy and went right to horny.

To be tagged in any future work of mine, please fill this out.

“Hank, have you seen her?” Logan asks, his voice layered with annoyance. You couldn’t help but silently snicker as you watched his brow crease, his nose twitch with frustration, his finger rapping at his side impatiently. The way his jaw ticked as Hank narrowed his own eyes at him made it impossible to hold your laughter, even when you were currently pressed up against the wall – a clear view of the situation going down. You pulled your lip between your teeth as you homed in on Logan’s features, eyes glimmering with rage. It was such a beautiful sight to see, one you have been dreaming of for months. Though you’d never openly admit it, everyone knew, all except him. You had to make the chase worth his while.

Logan Howlett is a force to be reckoned with, everyone told you that. When Charles and Eric first recruited you to teach with them in New York – you thought it was a joke, a cruel one at that. Living paycheck to paycheck in a hole in the wall Hell’s Kitchen apartment, dealing with constantly screaming and fighting from your neighbors, it wasn’t where you wanted to be. You were a survivor, you could adapt to anything, but after what you had experienced, you needed a fresh start. Working at a local diner, making shit for tips wasn’t ideal, but it was enough to help you save to leave. Where would you go prior to this? You had no idea, but someplace that experiences winter – you always loved the snow. But alas, that dreary November day a few years ago changed everything; It changed you. Meeting Logan on your first day told you everything you needed to know about him – he refuses to get close to anyone, you wanted to break that.

It's been three years since you first met Logan, two since you found yourself thinking he was cute, a year since you felt yourself falling for him, and six months since you started the cat and mouse chase. At first with how standoffish Logan was to you, you started to resent him. A year it took before that all fell to the wayside; Your feelings had shifted when you found him outside one night, crying as he smoked his cigar. Of course, your mutation left you able to turn invisible, able to watch him, without him knowing you were there. Through the heavy rain your smell was masked, he couldn’t tell you were there. But it made you feel closer to him; He wasn’t some robot who didn’t have emotions. He felt them too strong, which is why when he started to slip back into his mind, he pulled away. Being over 200 years old meant he saw some shit, lost people he loved, it took a toll on him after a while. That day forward you stopped keeping your distance, but instead made the effort to be near him, to show him you weren’t going anywhere.

Slowly you noticed how Logan started to open up to you, telling you stories of when he was young, his first mission with the X-Men. You got to learn a lot about The Wolverine, and come to find out he wasn’t a hard ass – he was sincere, doting, downright admirable. What he dealt with in his years fucked him up horribly to where he didn’t trust people easily – but it didn’t make him less. He always pushed forward and strove for success, to survive. He wouldn’t classify himself as a hero, but he was to you, and he deserved to know. Logan found himself trusting you easily after a year, his lonely nights stuck in his own head turned into game nights with you, strolls through the garden, getting a drink at the bar downtown. He could still be himself, but not have to carry the baggage by himself all the time. Falling hopelessly in love with him was inevitable, but also impossible. Nothing more could happen between the two of you and you knew that – but there was still a flicker of hope in your mind that wouldn’t quiet down. Especially with how flirty Logan had become with you.

 Usually, he was like this with Jean and Storm, taking it up a notch with them so he could have the last retort. To say he wasn’t a ladies’ man was a lie, he could pull anyone he wanted to. To Logan it was a game, seeing how flustered he could make him teammates – and he loved to win. With you it was different – it wasn’t low growls and light touching on your arms, no, it was more. At first to started off to be resting his chin on your shoulder, letting his breath stroke the column of your neck. Slowly it moved out to touches; Holding your waist from behind, rubbing his large hands over your lower stomach, slipping his hands under your shirt to caress your hip. Over the last few weeks though, he upgraded to holding your face, running his calloused thumb across your bottom lip, stealing forehead and cheek kisses before heading out. Rogue and Kitty that you two were dating, even Bobby got in on it – but when you stated you weren’t everyone looked at you like you had six heads.

“No Logan, I have not.” Hank let his eyes pan to where you were hiding as Logan turned away for a moment, giving you a small wink as he played along. After all, this was his idea – well, his and Xavier’s. You had overheard a conversation about how Logan’s cigar smell had been wafting into their classroom’s lately – distracting everyone as Logan taught. Charles had the bright idea for you to nab them and hold them hostage, until Logan learned his lesson. You on the other hand, were far too gone to do that. Instead you decided to take the cigars, but make a game out of it. Little post it notes with clues on where you were hiding, you stored them all over his bedroom and classroom, thanks to Scott. Ever since Jean told you just how primal Logan could get, how good of a tracker he was, you wanted to test it out for yourself. What better way than take the one thing he cannot live without? “What happened this time?”

Logan huffed as he ran both of his hands down his face, coming dangerously close to propping his hip against your body. You had to shuffle slightly as he leaned into the wall, letting his head bounce off the wood a few good times. “Little shit stole my box of cigars.” He looked exhausted, frustrated, and downright sexy. Seeing how lost and irritable he was without them made you smirk, causing you to bite your lip harder to suppress a whimper. You noticed how Logan’s ear perked up as you gulped, his head turning softly. Hank noticed this almost immediately and replied with a whooping laugh.  “Ha!” You sighed inaudibly as you silently thanked Hank, knowing he used his booming voice to mask your sounds. Holding one of his hands up to Logan, he snickered as he cleared his throat. “I’m sorry that was cruel of me. What I meant to say is, that’s funny.” Hank let out a small chortle at Logan’s distain, being met with a flash of a middle finger, and claw too.  “Thanks, asshole,” Logan huffed as he pushed himself off of the wall, running his hand through his hair.

You watched him intently, thanking whoever was listening for making you have the power of invisibility. Being able to listen to everything going down, while Logan has no idea you’re here, made you feel powerful. You heard talks about how your power could be useful, but ultimately not threatening; Now, you’d beg to differ. Though you grew tiresome of the chase, being a fly on the wall versus a real player. It was fun the first two hours this started, but encroaching on hour six – the school clearing out and the sun almost set on the horizon, you grew slightly bored. “Have you tried the library? She likes to hide there.” Hank let out without hesitancy, making your eyes grow wide. It was like an aha moment for you, choosing the most likely place for last. Earlier it was too crowded, people would know you were there the second Logan came looking for you. But now with the young mutants either outside or in the city due to the upcoming weekend, you knew it would be vacant.

“I know her all too well, Hank. That’s the first place I looked.” Hearing Logan say that made your heart flutter, made you feel special that he knew you so well. A strong sigh left your lips as Hank coughed, dreamily staring at Logan as you started to walk backwards. Losing your invisibility for a moment, you stood a few feet behind Logan, walking towards the grand staircase that took you to the library. Waving at Hank, you motioned for it as you smirked, causing Hank to laugh. “You sure?” He asked, nodding behind Logan. As you stood closer to the staircase, you noticed how Logan was sniffing the air – his body growing tense as he spun around. It’s when he laid his eyes upon you that you knew he was fed up. It wasn’t the primal growl and heavy breathing that got to you, but the way his hazel eyes went from green to black in a split section, his chest heaving as he stared at you. “Oh shit,” was all you managed to let out as you turned invisible again, running up the stairs.

Everything was a blur to you, running as fast as your body could take you. Three flights to get where you needed to go seemed like forever, when you were being chased by The Wolverine. He had super human speed, a great nose for sniffing things out, he was at the advantage whilst you were at a disadvantage. Even with scent masking, now that you started to sweat it would make you more obvious, especially when the library was empty. Huffing and puffing as you managed two steps at a time, you refused to look back. But you could hear the stomps of Logan’s boots, clearly taking three steps to match you. Silently you prayed to whoever was listening, to get you to the library safe and sound before Logan got you. The last thing you wanted was for him to pin you to the stairs so everyone could see, that was too on the nose.

Reaching the top step of the library, you managed to sway your way through the wooden chairs and tables, giggling to yourself as you were halfway across the room. Due to the grand nature of the library, especially being two floors, it gave you so many good hiding spots. A circular room to see everything, yet hide in plain sight. As you made it over to the spiral staircase for the second level, you had noticed Logan standing at the entrance of the library, huffing and puffing. It made you snort, seeing how riled up he was. You had to admit, it was sexy to see how pissed off he was, causing a fresh wave of your arousal to coat your panties. Logan seemed to have taken note as he sniffed the air, his eyes cutting across the room straight to yours. “Come on out princess,” he growled, flexing his hands at his side. Slowly you crept up the metal staircase for the second level, taking one step at a time to not elicit any sounds. You let your breathing relax, slowing your heart rate as you kept calm, not needing to give yourself away. But Logan could sense you, eyeing the staircase with every move you made. “I got you now.”

A devilish grin fought to claim his mouth as he pounced over the tables, running on all fours as he landed right at the bottom of the staircase. You managed to get all the way up and around, leaving to the right. Multiple aisles of books covered upstairs, as well as the walls, each window let in the dusk light – showing dust particles roaming the air. Your tell-tale shimmer of invisibility was caught in the light a few times, but Logan was too lost to notice. Finding your perfect hiding spot away from prying eyes, you slotted yourself against the endcap of Psychology of Mutants, knowing no one reads these. You could feel the stagnant beating of your heart at times, wondering if it was due to fear or the thrill of the chase. Maybe it was the aspect of it being bittersweet as well; A years long chase with Logan finally reaching its peak. You knew there would never be going back from this, and that was okay. Stealing his cigars wasn’t the endgame, it was only the beginning.

“You can’t hide forever you know,” Logan snarled as he reached the top of the landing, huffing as he eyed every shelf. You could see him, nor did you want to, hoping to God he chose to head left instead of right. Alas you were sorely mistaken as his heavy steps started to echo right, causing you to curse under your breath. SNIKT, you heard the metallic sound echoing through the room, but also your mind, causing you to whimper. Logan had unsheathed his claws, holding them out. The idea of him using the claws on you, pinning you down with them, holding them against your neck made your body run hot, your arousal heightening as the thoughts ran rampant through your mind. “I will catch you.” It was not a threat but a fact, Logan was not kidding anymore. The animal inside of him was taking over, leaving the Logan you knew behind. This was all caused because you pushed him to the point of no return, and you fucking loved it. The reverberation of his claws against the wooden shelves made you shudder, knowing how close he was getting now.

Biting down hard on your lip, you placed your hand over your mouth, trying to regain control of your breathing. Being right across from the last window on the right didn’t do you any good, especially with the beam of light falling through. If you moved even a millimeter, you were going to be made. It’s then when you opened your eyes to pan to your left that you saw his shadow encroaching on you, his stance wide as his claws were pointed at the ground. Each gruff huff he let out made your eyes roll back, finding it harder and harder to keep yourself hidden. You couldn’t look away from him either, you needed to watch him; How the sweat beaded at his hairline, how his little tufts of hair were wild from pulling at them, how his snarl got more animalistic the longer he tried to look for you. “Where did you go?” You couldn’t describe how Logan sounded in that moment; Primal and animalistic do not even begin to crest.

You focused too much on his tone, completely forgetting your watchful eye on him. When you glanced back after trying to calm yourself, you noticed the 6’2 Wolverine was no longer walking his way towards the aisles but vanished into thin air. Not knowing where he was, made your heart rate skyrocket – panic ensuing all over your body. Goosebumps arose across your skin as you pondered where he could be, afraid to move in case he was lurking close to you. Maybe he went off to the left instead, leaving you by yourself to escape. It would make sense, considering how you heard the creaking of the floorboards on the opposite side now. Letting out a concealed breath, you slowly moved away from the end cap of the shelf, leaving your back exposed. You knew it was a mistake when the hot, stifling air of the closed space became ice cold, a shiver falling down your spine. The sun shifted away in that moment, blanketing the area in darkness, complete with only a sliver of light, not even to cast shadows. The second your back was exposed; All hell broke loose.

Two strong hands grabbed hold of your hips, pulling you back into a solid form. The yelp you let out was loud enough to echo, but not loud enough to raise suspicion. The strain on your powers had gotten to be too much, slowly slipping back into being visible. You huffed out as your back connected with his chest, your hands finding purchase on his muscular forearms. “There you are little mouse.” He snickered in your ear, pressing his nose to the pulse point of your neck. Logan deeply inhaled at the vein, his teeth barring to nip at your exposed shoulder. It felt good to have his mouth on you, to have him seemingly obsessed with your scent. After all, it is what gave you away. Whimpering out, you dug your nails into Logan’s arm, feeling the reverberation of his snarl through your body. You couldn’t speak, you couldn’t move – you were a lost cause. “What’s the matter, cat got your tongue?”

Logan was mocking you at this point, purposely being a little shit to mimic how you have been with him. When it came to his cigars, he wasn’t fucking around. But when he knew it was you who took them, well he wasn’t going to let you live this down. Logan moved from behind you, but kept his hands grasping your flesh. Moving to the side, he pressed your back against the end cap again, bringing you back to your original position. His right hand remained on your hip as his left grasped your neck, pressing against your pulse point, feeling the thrum of blood on your veins. The edges of your vision began to go fuzzy due to the restricted blood flow, but you didn’t care. Logan was putting you right in your place, and you were obeying so well for him. “I believe you have something of mine,” he murmured; His prominent nose pressing harshly against your cheek. The warmth of his breath on your skin, mixed with the cold drag of his claws against your skin made you shiver, loving how it felt too much. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You laughed out, clearly laced with thrill.

Logan didn’t take too kindly to you playing dumb, the tick in his jaw spoke measures. His grip on your neck was heavier than before, using his full weight to restrict your blood flow quicker, your vision developing black dots. “Oh, you don’t?” The challenged in his voice said all you needed to know – he was fucking desperate. There was no hiding it now, he needed you – not his cigars, but you. Gulping down against his large hand, you felt the press of his claws against the back of your neck, pushing through the wood of the bookshelf to lock you in place. He would never intentionally draw blood, or hurt you, but he knew this was your deepest fantasy, all thanks to Jean relaying it. His lips were inches from your ear as he chuckled darkly, groaning out against the flesh. “Do I need to jog your memory?” You shouldn’t have been as turned on by that as you were. Your knees buckled slightly as you almost fell, your eyes rolling back into your head.

Logan took advantage of your eyes being closed to pull his hand away from your hip. The loss of touch made you whine, but quickly you were quieted by his roughened tugs. Grabbing at the edge of your tank top, Logan ran his claws through the fabric to create slits, ripping them open just as easily. Looking down at your jeans, he could see the bulge in your pocket – where you had hidden a few of his cigars. A huff of relief fell from his parted lips as she cut your pocket open, letting them fall right into his hand. He mimicked your hiding and shoved them into his own pocket, moving on to the next. The cool breeze against your exposed skin made you quickly heat up; Logan using his claws on you made you lose your fucking mind. He repeated his efforts with your other side, making matching holes in his jeans and shirt, not caring anymore.

It was as the last few cigars rolled out of your pocket that Logan pulled back, his heavy body heat no longer suffocating you. The contact was missed, causing you to pout slightly. “Boo hoo hoo,” Logan mocked as he watched you, walking backwards to push his back against the window. The sill right below it was begging him to sit, so he took advantage of it. Reaching into his left pocket, Logan pulled out his Zippo lighter – flicking it against his pants to ignite the flame. It was intoxicating watching him, how effortlessly fluid his motions were. Biting your cheek, you watched him intently, his eyes never leaving yours. He pulled out the precut cigar from his pocket and pushed it between his lips, favoring his left side for it to rest between his teeth. Lighting the end until the cherry burned bright, he took a few quick puffs, blowing the smoke out in a cloud around him.

Your eyes could not pull away from him even if you tried, it was nearly impossible. The way he moved was like silk through the wind, so effortless and elegant; He knew he was hot like this. Taking another quick drag, Logan let the smoke fall from his lips as he tucked the cigar back in between his teeth, putting away his lighter. Reaching forward with his claws still extended, he hooked two of the blades into the belt loop of your jeans, tugging you forward. There was about a person’s space between the bookshelf and the window, making it easy for him to grab at you. Of course, your body obeyed his silent command, tripping slightly as you tried to regain your footing. Placing both of your hands on his thick, warm thighs, you licked your lips. The smoke being released from both the cigar and his mouth captured your attention, making it difficult to focus on what he was saying. The way his motions flowed were so smooth, it was impossible to say anything else to him.

Taking a rather large drag of his cigar, he puffed his cheeks out a bit to hold it all in. It took you by surprise, why he was holding it all in his mouth. Retracting his claws on his right hand, Logan grabbed at your jaw like a man possessed, pushing his meaty fingertips into your flesh. The slight ache of his possessiveness made your mouth part, a pained look on your face that you were lost in. Logan got close to you, his lips only mere inches away from your mouth as you whimpered. With your lips parted, Logan mimicked your motions as he breathed out. The soft, heady tendrils of smoke wafted from his mouth into yours, causing you to let them stir. Tobacco mixed with the sweetness of the wrap caused your eyes to dilate, boring into Logan with pure unadulterated lust. There was no mistaking it as he shotgunned his cigar with you, his smirk prevalent. “That’s my good girl.” He crooned, taking in your big eyes, the heat of your skin – basking in your glory.

You blew the smoke right back at Logan while he chuckled, licking his lips to wet them as he took another puff. There was something so intoxicating about how you reacted, it was like watching a painting come to life. From the first day he met you, he knew you were something else – he had to challenge you. Almost four years later and you’re still trying to get with him, he admired it. Finally, the silent love he had for you could be shown, but he wasn’t going to make it easy for you. You made him work to catch you, now you had to work to get what you wanted. “Get on your knees.” The command fell off of Logan’s lips so naturally you almost didn’t catch it at first. Your eyes glossy as you watched him, your brain not keeping up. Narrowing his eyes at you, he cocked his brow as he laid the cigar to the side, watching to see your reaction. “I’m sorry?” You questioned without realizing, your face slack with lust.

Reaching forward towards you, Logan grabbed your neck once more, this time yanking you so close to his face that you felt his breath waft over your features. “Get. On. Your. Fucking. Knees.” There was no hesitation in Logan’s voice as he stated his command, letting his face go rigid to show he was getting pissed off. “Don’t make me repeat myself.” You wanted to, every fiber of your being wanted to disobey him, make him angry so he was rough with you – at the same time you didn’t want to make him mad, not yet anyway. Nodding to him against his hand, you slipped down to your knees easily with a moan, pressing out your wet bottom lip as you gazed up at him.

Logan rolled his eyes as he grabbed the cigar again, pressing it against your lips. It’s when you take a drag of it that he pulls out, putting it in his own mouth once more. With his hand now free from holding his cigar, he quickly flicked open his belt buckle, undoing the top button on his jeans as you took the silent command to pull his zipper down. His erection was stiff against his jeans and left nothing to the imagination. He was big, he was hot, and he was fucking turned on. Watching you with a lustful glow in his eyes, Logan groaned as he watched you, never letting you have the last word: “You may have started the game princess, but I am going to finish it.”

----

Tagging: @livelaughl0ve3 @mehjustalasshere @allen-444 @begaytotallygay @tezooks @hughj1d @mami-veracruz @salemslostwitch @karencaribou @princesstarble @dirtylittlefairytales @hbwrelic @mosscrissfemmefatale @pinkanonwriting @craziersarah98 @actuallybridgetjones @silversprings-mp3 @lokidovahkiin

[foldingfittedsheets]

I worked retail for a long time and people really do treat you like shit sometimes. But between selling sex toys, mattresses, and jewelry I can say definitively I got treated worst selling mattresses.

All three of my jobs were in sales but selling sex toys we were allowed to put people in their place, and in jewelry people didn’t want to misbehave in a fancy setting. But people at the mattress store had no problem yelling at me, hitting on me, or insulting me to my face.

For a while I was managing my own store for the company. I ran a small location and had struggling employees placed with me for rehabilitation. If their numbers improved they could go back to bigger stores. If not, they got fired.

So this meant I was the manager of problem employees. At one point both of my people had a foot out the door. The company was going downhill and changed computer systems and they were fed up. Consequently, they made a ton of mistakes, because they just didn’t care about the job or learning the new systems.

I strolled into work on what was essentially my Monday to a shit show. Deliveries scheduled without product, wrong things on orders, poor expectations of the process, you name it. I spent the entire morning getting yelled at for mistakes that weren’t mine.

The final straw came when a man called furious that his moms bed for her nursing home had a delivery window he couldn’t accommodate. This wasn’t a huge disaster since we still had time to deliver it before she moved. I ran him through the options and he just kept screaming at me. Not for a solution but because I was there and he was frustrated.

My heart filled with malice and a cold fury. A calculating part of my brain had a realization in that moment that I could stay a punching bag or I could strike back.

I quavered my voice delicately, taking in a shaky, warbling breath like I was trying not to cry. “Sir,” I quivered through fake tears, “I don’t know what you want from me! I told you what I can do, I didn’t make this mistake I’m just trying to fix it!” My voice broke pitifully on the last syllables, sounding in all ways like a sweet innocent person being yelled at who’s just trying her best, really!

It was like I’d doused him with cold water. My emotional act was the realization that he was screaming at someone who was just doing their damn job, and he was being an asshole. He hastily made an excuse and hung up.

I had a third employee covering with me from another store that day who heard everything. When I hung up, I looked over to see them watching me with an awed expression. “Did… did you just pretend to cry?”

“I absolutely fucking did,” I said with feeling, “and I’d do it a thousand more times. If that’s what it takes for someone to realize they’re behaving like a fucking prick, they deserve it.” The employee looked at me like I was their hero.

The man called back, apologizing profusely, having magically arranged his schedule to accommodate delivery. He came in later that week with an apology Starbucks gift card. I was gracious in my acceptance.

I pulled it a few more times before leaving the company. I felt no shame in the ruse. If someone behaves so poorly that it’s plausible their behavior would drive someone to tears they deserve to feel absolutely wretched about it.

[jyoongim]

This is more of an idea (feel free to not respond btw)

But what if married reader gets knocked up with Alastors fawn and the husband divorced her once he realizes the baby isn’t his? You can bet your ass that the deer daddy is already trying to ensnare the reader in his grasp lol

Hehehe i have never written a Part 2 so fast !

Part 1

————————————————————————

“Oh my Satan dear! Look at you! Ya look like you’re bout to pop!” Rosie exclaimed when you walked in her shop.

’Pop’ was an understatement.

You were very near the end of your pregnancy and it had not been kind to you.

You never told your husband about the incident with Alastor.

Would he had even believed you?

Alastor was A LOT of things, but the two of you were friends…your husband would think call you insane….

Your eyes widened seeing the very cause of your discomfort.

Alastor.

You wanted to dash out the door, run back home and hide.

The red Overlord turned around, hearing Rosie’s voice, you froze seeing his eyes look you over, you instinctively placed a hand over your stomach when his lips stretched into a smile.

You heard Rosie excuse herself to go get some appetizers but you were too focused to acknowledge her.

You were alone.

With him.

You took a shaky breath as memories from several months ago flashed across your mind, but you shook your head lightly to discard those thoughts.

”My my look at you” he purred approaching until he towered over you, beaming like a Cheshire cat “You really do make a fine mother” his large hand caressed the swell of your belly, smile softening when he felt movement.

”j-just leave me be please” you whispered, wincing when he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest.

Alastor chuckled ”leave you be? Oh ma cherie no can do!” 

He bent his head, his lips grazing the shell of your ear, voice dropping to a whisper “especially since you’re about to give birth to my baby?”

You pushed him away, putting distance between the two of you. Your face was flushed, eyes narrowed “I am NOT having your baby! I am having my husband’s baby!” You defended.

But there was a sliver of doubt you always felt when it came to the little soul nestled within you.

Alastor’s smile never wavered “Hmm you sure? Because i remember vividly filling your cunt with my seed until it dripped down your legs” 

You froze.

”You took me so well I was positive you would be pregnant”

He took small steps towards you

”Did you tell your husband?” 

Your snarl fell at his words and he knew he had you.

”T-there’s n-nothing to tell” you said turning around, ready to leave. 

You didnt have to take this.

He hummed coming up behind you. “Nothing to tell?” He chuckled darkly as his lanky arms wrapped around you, cradling your swollen belly. He leaned his head on top of yours.

”Oooh darlin I’m hurt! You didnt tell your loving husband how you milked my cock? How I tasted the cunt that belonged to him? How I claimed you for myself? That I sent you home filled with my cum?”

You were shaking.

”How unfaithful you were? Could the poor man tell another man’s cum was inside you while he fucked you?”

He kissed your neck

”I can’t wait to meet our little fawn”

Your baby kicked causing him to smile.

————————————————————————-

Pain.

Thats all you felt as you tried to breath through your contraction.

”You got this honey! You’re doing great” your husband soothed as you wailed.

”One more push maam the baby’s almost here” the nurse reassured you.

Almost? It felt like you been pushing forever

”I cant” you panted.

Everything burned.

Your husband dabbed at your sweaty forehead, pressing a kiss to it “You got this baby. C’mon just one more push and then it’ll all be over”

Your eyes clenched and with a scream you pushed.

”Aaahh!”

Relief and then the shrill cry of a baby.

The nurses cooed “Ooh a healthy boy!”

she cleaned up the baby and you sighed as you slumped against the bed.

Finally.

”Ok mama” you felt a small weight on your chest.

Soft noises had you look down and you felt your heart break and bloom.

Red tufts of hair curled on the babe’s head and he looked at you with big red eyes.

He looked like you; round cheeks and a cute nose.

He looked nothing like your husband.

And every bit like…

”what the fuck” you heard your husband say. You turned to him, eyes wide.

He was staring at the baby.

”I-Its n-not what you think dear j-just let me-”

”You fucked Alastor” he was frowning, standing up from the bed.

You shook your head, tears swelling

”N-no that’s…I didnt i swear”

”I am looking at his exact copy. The damn brat looks nothing like me!”

You couldnt move “Honey p-please”

The man backed away. He was angry.

The baby began to cry, you tried to rock the poor soul, but your attention was on your husband

”Honey-”

”I should have known” he hissed lowly, pacing.

”I should have known by the way he acted. How you flirted with each other! The fucking radio demon!? Tsk!”

He turned to look at you.

”I dont want some bitch who takes me for a fool. Hope it was worth it you fucking slut” he turned to walk out.

tears ran down your face, your heart was racing “W-What? Honey no it wasn’t like that..it-it was never-”

”I want a divorce. You are dead to me”

and like that he was gone.

You sat there stunned.

Your husband just…left.

He left you and he didn’t even let you explain, tell him how or why all this was happening.

The baby cooed and you looked down at him.

You wanted to be angry, you had every right to be, but looking at this sweet soul…he didnt deserve your anger.

You were a mother now. You would do your best to love your child.

Even if you had to do it alone.

————————————————————————————-

“What a fine mother you make indeed my dear”

He smiled watching the little fawn latch to your chest and stare back at him with vermillion eyes.

You hissed at him, earning a quirked brow “haven’t you done enough?”

Soft static buzzed through the air as the Overlord approached you. You took a step back, as he extended a hand to the babe and rubbed his chubby cheek.

Alastor ignored your question ”How are you feeling love?” He asked as the baby nuzzled into your neck.

How were you feeling?

You were divorced, a single mother, and living with Rosie.

Shunned.

All because of him.

”Like hell but I know you’re not here to ask about my well being”

Alastor ignored your jab.

”I do care for you darlin and its only right that I provide for you and our fawn”

You went to growl, threaten him to die, but your baby reached out to the red demon.

Alastor’s face light up and he grabbed the fawn, cooing and tickling the baby.

Your son squealed and giggled, trying to grab at his claws.

”Let’s make a deal dearest”

You straightened at his words. A deal with Alastor was dangerous.

But you were at rock bottom.

”What kind of deal?” You asked cautiously.

”Marry me. Marry me and you’ll have nothing to be worried about. You’ll be protected, cared for, and have anything you desire.”

The baby was gumming at his collar.

”Be mine”

You bit your lip. What did you have to loose?

You sighed, taking your son.

You looked at the tall demon, green magic swirling around him.

”Do we have a deal?” he extend his hand.

You looked at your baby and then back at Alastor.

”I hate you” you said taking his hand,

You winced as your hand burned and watched a gold ring appear on your finger.

Radio static buzzed and then a soft humming. Alastor purred, smiling, fixing his jacket.

“Oh my dear” His arm looped around your waist, bringing you close to him as he chuckled “Such a good girl”

“Now! I think I have the perfect place for us to raise our fawn”

—————————————————————————————

“Uggghh Al you got a little something…” Charlie said nervously as she watch Alastor sip his coffee.

The little red fawn was hanging on his antlers, happily gnawing at the appendages. Alastor looked up, smiling “Oh he’s fine”

”Alastor have you seen…” your voice floated into his ears as you entered the lobby, stopping when you saw your son among his father’s antlers.

Alastor let out a grunt as the baby pulled at his ears “Hes right here dear”

Your baby babbled as you approached, squealing when you plucked him from his father.

You scowled the Overlord, placing the baby on your hip.

”How many times have I told you not to just let him hang-”

”da-”

You froze.

“Da…da” your son babbled, squirming in your arms.

Charlie cooed and Alastor smirked as the fawn’s eyes welled with tears as he reached for his father. Alastor walked towards you, scooping the baby from you.

You pouted as the baby happily chirped, nuzzling in his father’s neck.

Alastor sneaked a soft kiss to your lips 

“See he’s fine”

You sighed, rolling your eyes, arms crossing.

”Oh smile my dear. Maybe the next one will say mama first” he laughed, eyes settling on your round belly.

”After all you’re a great mother”

[iid-smile]

#02 for ୨ৎ ⸝⸝ @whispytrees ⋆

hi! thank you for your order! i see you got yourself 5, 10 and 21, a little bit of everything. also you love what i write omg???? got me squealing, giggling, kicking my feet just a bit... (i screamed) you're so sweet <3 no pun intended here hehe. dazai we shall! went with headcanons since you didn't specify, i hope that's okay!

#5 🍰 | having kids together

dazai is either a suspiciously good girl dad, or the type to scare his kid whenever he can

would use the time between pregnancy or adoption process as an "excuse" to get off work, except he's actually doing a lot to make sure the little girl has the best environment to grow up with

wants to give her the childhood he never got, so he'll say yes to everything she wants unless it'll get her harmed or in danger

has no filter around your daughter, so please beware and stay close at all times!! he can and will go into deep depth about... multiple not-so-safe-for-kids topics and cause her to cry, so make sure you're ready to give her a big hug

anyways! he loves dancing with her more than anything. will buy his daughter all sorts of cute dresses no matter the age (big skirts are the best!) may even get her into dance classes; most likely ballet or ballroom. it's always cute to catch them in the act

sasses his teenage daughter back. NOTHING is getting past him. he takes treat people how you want to be treated seriously in this household

#10 🍓 | cuddling during the morning / night

morning

quite often, dazai is too lazy to get up (especially if it's for work) if you have to get up too, then you're not. keeping you in bed is most effective when he's the big spoon, because he holds you tight and squishes his cheek against your nap

tickles you because he knows his fingers get really cold sometimes. actually, he's just a really cold guy in general, it's weird.

mumbles about random things as if he's drunk. it's just him ranting about how much he love you and how much his life has changed for the better since he met you.

sleepy dazai is just clingy overall. every single one of his body parts has to be touching yours

night

you have to hold hands! it's a requirement. facing each other, spooning, on top of each other, upside down or whatever, his hand is always linked with yours

if you're already asleep, he'd quietly yap about how his day went, making sure to whisper so you wouldn't wake up.

eventually goes quiet, and just stares at you. every single detail on your face. he's not picky about looks, but you're the most attractive person he's ever seen

gently nudges your head towards his chest and tucks it under his chin, falling asleep while smiling. his biggest fear is not sleeping by your side after all.

#21 🍦 | where they like to kiss you

we all know dazai loves hands.

the back of your hand and knuckles are obvious ones, but he kisses your fingertips and wrists a lot too. fingertips are his favourite! he does this thing where he'll kiss your middle and index finger, and pulls your hand over to place them on his heart.

lips, but it's not really a kiss. it's just pressing your lips together, no smooches </3 he mostly does this to tease you, because you can always feel the small smirk he has.

shoulders too because why not? shoulder blade is where he loves to kiss you. no particular reason, it's just a nice spot for when he's behind you.

your neck would be another spot where he loves to tease, and he does the same thing where he just presses his lips against it, not kissing. sometimes just ghosts his lips over your skin to feel you shiver.

event masterlist

[heartsforvin]

Hi!! id love a hurt/comfort type fic. maybe reader hears Vin saying reader is too clingy or sees him flirting with someone else and they have a huge fight but make up at the end (i hope this makes sense lmao) <3

TOO CLINGY

thank you for the request !! i hope you enjoy <33

pairing: vinnie hacker x fem!reader

warnings: hurt/comfort, cussing, arguments, use of pet names, lmk if i forgot anything !!

summary: you overhear vinnie tell one of his friends that you’re too clingy, which results in an argument between the two of you

the night was going just fine until you overheard your boyfriend say something that completely ruined your mood.

you and vinnie were out at one of your guys’ friends house for a little get together. it’d been a bit since everyone got to hang out, so you decided to all get together again.

you were standing off to the side, chatting with one of your friends while vinnie was not too far from you, talking to his.

you don’t know how this subject came up, seeing as you could only hear parts of the conversation over the music.

when you did though, your whole body shut down and you just felt like crying.

“yeah lately she’s just been extra fuckin’ clingy, i don’t know what it’s about but it’s getting old real fuckin’ fast.”

anxiety ran through you faster than ever, and all you wanted to do was go in your room and hide from absolutely everyone and everything.

the only reason you’d been so clingy lately was because vinnie’s been in paris for a few days, not being able to see him.

so yeah, you’d say you have a pretty good reason.

pushing past people in the crowded house, you make your way to the bathroom, shutting the door and locking it before going over to the sink.

you grip it harshly as you try to hold yourself together.

splashing water on your face you hear a knock come from the door behind you.

“occupied!” you shout, hoping whoever on the other side can hear through the loud noise.

when another knock came soon after you groaned and shouted again, only to be followed by an all too familiar voice calling out your name.

“let me in, sweetheart.” his voice, although a shout, sent instant serotonin through you.

you open the door just enough for vinnie to see your eyes, head barely peaking out.

“see, ‘m fine.” you say as if you didn’t just almost cry over his words.

vinnie though, knows you better than that. “let me in, please.” he says, just enough for you to hear.

opening the door wider, vinnie steps inside and shuts it behind him. you go to sit on the closed toilet seat while vinnie leans against the door.

“what’s wrong?” he asks, breaking the silence between the two of you.

sighing, your head is in your hands as you squeeze your eyes shut, trying not to let a tear slip.

you feel a hand on your knee and that’s when you move your hands from your face and see vinnie is now eye level with you.

“i heard you,” you say, making vinnie’s brows furrow. “heard what you were saying to adam and jett.”

vinnie sighed when he finally realized what you were talking about. he thought he was far enough out of earshot for you to hear.

“baby i— no, don’t try and excuse this, vinnie!” you shout at him.

vinnie stands and backs up, giving you space even though it’s a small space.

“i’m not gonna fuckin’ give you an excuse!” he shouts back. “maybe it’s true! maybe you have been a bit to clingy lately!”

you just sit there, taking his words in as he shouts at you. hearing it a second time is just as bad as the first.

he hasn’t been too busy lately up until he went to paris, so the two of you did spend a lot of time before then.

still didn’t excuse the fact that words hurt. clingy or not, you just loved spending time with vinnie.

“i haven’t seen you in days vinnie!” its just a screaming match at this point, hoping no one can hear your words to each other.

vinnie sighs as he rubs his hands over his face, listening to you speak. “you’ve been in europe for days, vin! sorry i’ve just wanted to spend time with my boyfriend.”

vinnie rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “you won’t leave me alone for five fucking minutes!”

his voice gets more stern which only spurs on tears faster. you want to let them spill, to let every tear that you have out, but you won’t.

he was right, you have been kind of up his ass lately, not letting him be. that’s only because he’s spent all his needed time in europe, now it was your time with him.

“all i want is five minutes to myself,” he sighs. “even when i stream, you’re standing right there, breathing over me.” he tells you.

your eyes become watery and suddenly you can’t hold them in anymore and you just let the tears fall.

with your head in your hands again, you silently cry as your body shakes, vinnie watching this all unfold.

“i’m sorry i just miss you!” you scream at him through your cries, voice straining as you do. “all it ever is, is work, work, work. i just want five minutes with you!”

vinnie gets down to your level again and places his hands on yours. he hears you, truly does, but you need to to understand one thing.

“this is my job, baby. you know this,” he says. “you think i like working, going out of the country this much?”

he does, don’t get him wrong, but he also loves to be home with you.

however, when you’re always up on him when he does come back from a five to seven day trip, that’s when he get irritated.

you shake your head at his question, he wipes your tears with the pads of his thumbs, making you smile.

you kiss his hand when he moves them to your cheeks. “there’s that pretty smile.” he says.

“i’m sorry for yelling, i just get so frustrated sometimes,” vinnie sighs. “i love you, you know that.”

you smile weakly at him. “i’m sorry too. i just miss you so much when you’re not with me, and when you finally are, i just like to be with you every second.”

vinnie caresses your cheek and smiles at you. “i know, sweetheart. you know i love our time together, but some things you do have to let me do on my own.” he chuckles.

you reciprocate with another smile, but finally leaning in to give him a proper kiss. tears are still on your cheeks, so he wipes them away as the two of you share this cute moment.

“are we good now?” he asks, pulling you up off the toilet seat.

you hug him tightly, nuzzling into his chest as his arms wrap around your waist.

“we’re good.” you smile up at him.

he kisses you once more before opening the bathroom door and the two of you join the others again.

hi hi !! thank yo for the request again !! i hope you loved it !!

tags: @cosmicanakin , @anqeliclust , @sturnioloshacker , @khackerr , @bernelflo , @louloulemons-blog , @leqonsluv3r , @kriissy4gov , @kayleighh , @slvthrs , @0strawberrysorbet0 , @defnotayonna , @supabhad , @hallecarey1 , @thesebitcheslovesosadotcom , @khxna , @skye-44 , @jpg3 , @eddieslut69 , @miilzzy ,

[wordsarelife]

—last kiss

pairing: theo nott x fem!reader

summary: theo and you spend time at the most beautiful place on earth and it belongs just to the both of you

note: this is my entry for the jinxed july challenge of @finalgirllx and @thatdammchickennugget

warnings: mentions of death

"last one there owes the other a secret"

blades of grass whip against your legs. wind floods your hair and the sun kisses your skin. you're probably hardly as fast as him, but you still don't stop sprinting.

"come on!" he calls loudly, his voice flying over the field and even though you know you're already running as fast as possible, you feel yourself speeding up. 

"i'm not as fast" you scream, while laughing.

"excuses" theo replies. 

your breath is heavy and you're sure your lungs will combust any second now, but before that can happen, he stops, turning his body to look at you. 

theo's face is so beautiful that you might just start crying. his eyes are blue, resembling the darkest spot in the ocean and his lips are curved upwards as he smiles at you. his hair looks soft and warm, enlightened by the sun. 

you stop in front of him, catching your breath. 

he bends down to pick a flower, pushing it behind your ear. "you look so pretty" he says. 

you say nothing. you just smile, wondering how he can say something like that when he himself looks like a greek god. 

"come on" theo says once again, outstretching his hand and taking yours. he walks you through the flower field, further and further than from where you came. 

"where are we going?" you ask, your voice just above a whisper. it's so quiet, you don't even have to speak louder for him to understand.

"a special place" theo answers and you roll your eyes behind his back. "a surprise i set up"

"you're so secretive" you laugh, slapping his arm. 

"and you're impatient."

you shake your head, what he can't see of course, but still. 

there's a bit of space in the middle of the big field, a tree hanging over the field and making space from the flowers around it. there's a blanket waiting and a basket. 

the place is absolutely beautiful just in itself, but theo made a point to decorate the tree and the blanket.

"it's gorgeous" you gush, taking his face in your hands and littering it with kisses. 

he laughs.

the wind pushes hair into your face, as you kneel down to sit on the blanket. you can't even see over the flowers around you. hiding the both of you away from the world, as you sit underneath a tree in the middle of a field of beautiful flowers. 

"how come this is still so..?"

"beautiful and untouched?" theo suggests, looking around. "it belongs to my family, otherwise i'm sure there would be a supermarket or something"

you smile. "why did you never bring me here before?"

he shrugs. "i brought you here now" 

you nod and laugh. "yeah, alright"

theo opens the basket, pushing a display of various different fruits in your direction. you smile at his dedication and take a few strawberries. 

"so?" he raises his brows and smiles at you. "i'm waiting"

the strawberries color your tongue red and leave a hint of sweetness on your lips. you smile conspiratorial. "i'm not telling you"

"well, you have to, those are the rules" 

"it's unfair" you argue playfully. "you're much faster than me and i didn't even know where we were going, so you would've won anyway"

he doesn't give in. "rules are rules, baby" he shrugs and you roll your eyes. he throws a blueberry at you, which bounces from your forehead and falls onto the blanket between you. you pick it up and plop it into your mouth, coloring your tongue purple.

"go on, love" he encourages when you're still not saying anything. 

"fine" you sigh. "i want it to be you"

"want me to be what?" he wonders, there's no hint of a joke in his voice, it's just a question. 

"i want you to be everything. my yesterday, my tomorrow. i want you to be forever, i want us to be forever" 

"we will" theo assures, kissing your temple softly, not able to hide the big goofy smile on his face. 

"you're so annoying" you giggle when he starts littering your face with kisses. 

"you don't think i'm annoying" he argues, while he starts tickling you. "you think i'm everything"

"damn right i do" you smile, as he holds in his movement "what about you?"

"me?" he repeats. "i don't have to tell you one, remember? last one there owes the other a secret. i was very clearly not last."

you roll your eyes, but accept his explanation. 

theo opens his mouth and you flick blueberries inside, coloring his tongue purple. there's a hint of sweetness on both of your mouths when you finish the strawberries and kiss his lips, tasting it. everything tastes better on his lips. even sadness. 

he holds you close to him, softly deepening the kiss and pushing his tongue into your mouth. your hands are moving in his hair and he draws patterns on the skin of your hips. 

you walk the way back. hand in hand, while you finish the rest of the blueberries. 

"they are my favourites" theo informs you.

"now you did tell me a secret" you say matter of factly. 

"that's not a secret" he insists. "but i think that depends how you define one. you seem to have a pretty low requirement"

"well, any new information you tell me is practically a secret, considering i know so much about you already" you shrug "and you had all these years to tell me" 

"you know me best" he smiles and you feel proudness bubble in your chest. "i would share secrets with you any day"

the field is just as beautiful in the winter, when you come visit it in thick clothes and blue lips. the wind has settled down and you get warm while running through the snow. 

this time you're ahead of him by a lot, which has to be on purpose. 

you reach the tree first, slapping a gloved hand against it. "ha!" you laugh, when he finally falls against the tree, next to your hand. 

"now, let's hear it, lover-boy" you raise a brow, waiting for him to catch his breath. you're almost a bit worried when it takes him longer than expected, but he speaks before you can question him about it.  

"i'm crazy about you" theo says, finally and you giggle. "and you make me feel special, no one can do that apart from you" 

you smile at him and hope that he can feel all the love and adoration you put into it. "i'm even crazier about you" you plaster a warm kiss onto his cold cheek. "and you are special, you don't need someone to make you feel like you are" 

"i'm gonna beat you the next time" he laughs, breathing in cold air and coughing it out again. 

whispered words and sunny days make the snow disappear. you sit in the tree, with theo underneath. both of you are quietly reading, only connected through the same words on either paper. 

"it's your turn" theo says as he turns his head upwards. 

you're not convinced. you didn't run here, so there's not really a winner. "unfair" you say in a sing-song and you can practically feel him roll his eyes.

"go on, love" theo says. "it was my turn the last time, remember?"

"okay, sure, mister always right" you give in, eager to return to your book as soon as possible. "you look hot today" you giggle as soon as the words have left your lips. theo looks up at you with big eyes of surprise and you laugh even louder. 

"that doesn't count" he protests. 

"not secret enough for you?" 

"it's not a secret, if anything it's just a fact" he jokes, but can't help and starts laughing at the pretended seriousness in his voice. 

"well, that's the only secret you're getting today, my love"

"whatever" 

the heat pools over both of your bodies, so you're again deciding not to run, when you come back in the summer.

still, you make a point of throwing your hand against the tree first, catching the short second of annoyance flashing over his face, as he did not think of doing that. 

"i'm ready, baby" you dance around him, as he puts down the picnic blanket, easily ignoring you. 

theo pats for you to join him and you sit down just as he throws his head into your lap. 

"today was a good day" he says and you nod, both of you deciding that it's secret enough.

"yes" you smile, as he closes his eyes tiredly. you kiss his forehead and push back his shortened hair, running your fingers through it as he easily slips into a soft sleep, both you and the sun caressing him. 

you don't come back in autumn or winter, not even in spring of the next year. it takes a whole year for you to return, when it is summer again and the heat almost burns off your skin. 

blades of grass whip against your legs. wind floods your hair and the sun kisses your skin. you're probably hardly as fast as him, but you still don't stop sprinting.

the wind moves the tree in front of you and also the flowers. it is soothing, considering the heat.

you reach the tree, slapping your hand against it, but not waiting for him to do the same, before you sink down in the grass. 

you keep silent, both of you just sitting, without anyone saying anything. 

you sigh, pushing a hand over the stone, trying to get rid of the dirt and leaves that fell from the tree. 

"fine" you finally say, laying down beside him and staring into the sky, that is almost invisible, because the tree is in the way. 

"but there's nothing new for me to tell you" you explain. "you can't be picky, you know? after all the time that passed before i came back" 

the silence is loud and harsh and you try to fill it, but end up helplessly sighing, before you find the words to continue. "i wish i could tell you something new" you mutter, a lump in your throat and a stone on your heart. a tear slips from your eye. your voice falls to a whisper. 

you don't have to speak louder than that for him to hear you. the field is quiet and so is the world around you now. 

"i still want it to be you" you can't help but cry "there's nothing i can do about it, my love" you shake your head "and i know that it's probably a shit secret, but i just want you to know the truth, my hurtful, heartbreaking, but honest truth" 

you push your hand against the stone once more, before standing up from your position next to him. 

you walk away from the tree, surrounded by a flower field. away from the most beautiful place on earth and away from theo. 

theo's tombstone rests under the tree for the rest of what you thought would be forever. the pages of the calender turning without him moving. you know it's the right place for him, because it is beautiful, no matter the season, just like theo was.

you'll come back for every season for the rest of your life, a hand on the locket with his photo and another filled with secrets. you'll have to tell a secret every time now, because theo stays under the tree and you will always be the last one there, no matter how fast you run. 

[shimylli]

So after some time to think about it, I will share my own though on Solavellan ending in Dragon Age The Veilguard, so SPOILER ahead.

ON ROOK AND SOLAS

First I would like to share a bit about them, because I really enjoyed their dynamics on the game.

« – Letting the veil collapse... – ... Is what you want. Making amend isn't about what you want. »

I wish so bad those words, and the whole cinematic would have been from my Inquisitor perspective. That she could be the one angry, and also saying the right word, she derseved it, after all this time.

But I am not angry at all, because like I said, I enjoy Rook and Solas relationship.

Solas treat Rook the way he would have never treated Lavellan. There is such a cruelty in trapping someone in an eternal and lonely prison, and Rook - specially if you play it as a supportive and forgiveful one - is one of the least to deserve it.

Rook see the manipulative, abusive and cruel side of the Trickser god. Solas never really let is guard down this time, He doesn't allow it considering how close he was to stop everything by the time of Inquisition.

Rook forgiving and believing in Solas, still, despite everything he has done to her, was also really impactful and satisfying. And for Solas, it was the first step through healing.

INQUISITOR INTERVENTION

As he still proceed on his plan, he hear the voice of the Inquisitor, and turn so fast.

It is so hearbeaking, and after all this time, he still calls her " Vhenan ".

And for her, he lets his guard down, again.

« – You think you've come too far to come back, but you're wrong. »

Lavellan plays a really mature and forgiving part, and I think it makes sense. In Inquisition, I played an angry Lavellan, the one who scream in elvish and then say " I would have had you trust me " while angrily entering his personal space. But it has been 10 years, and like us, she had time to think about it, to take distance and make peace about their relationship.

Solas is looking for every way to proove that he is undeserving of her forgiveness, give many excuses.

«– I forgive you ! »

I was so happy about the Voice Acting, when Lavellan assertively cut him and scream at him this sentence. She already failed 8 years ago to convince him to stay, and she will not let her second chance pass.

And then...

MYTHAL AND SOLAS

Ugh. Where to start.

I like what they did with Solas and Mythal relationship, seeing how abusive and manipulative Mythal was. In a way, it makes the time between Solas and Lavellan in Inquisition even softer, as she accepted him for the person he was and wanted to be. A person who gave advice and share his wisdom. An equal.

I also don't think that Mythal and Solas were romantically involved, and it would have been better to avoid the companions comment about it, making it moreconfusing. Actually, it would have been even better to not have the team reuniting to watch and comment the really personal memories of Solas like a TV Show.

Mythal is the third to offer forgiveness by sharing the weight of their mistakes, and even so I wish she would have been an optional intervention, I have to recognise that the scene is intense and painful - positevily - to watch.

This is the moment the Lost Elf theme start to play as the same time as the main DA TV theme with violin, they managed to make it even sader.

His body language. He is breaking, getting crushed by the weight from his pain. To see him, so vulnerable, so small, it was heartbreaking. And when Mythal release him, say the last word that finally free him, is like he can no longer stand, he fall crying.

Obviously, he was no longer bounded to Mythal since long, and every bad decision he took in the past were taken freely. Still, metaphorically, it was really symbolic. The guy has been suffering for thousand years.

SOLAS AND LAVELLAN

«– Banal Nadas Ar lath'ma Vhenan. »

And then Lavellan walks slowly towards him, and softly kneel to look him in the eyes. She is caring and supportive, and start saying reassuring words in elvhen. I feel like them speaking in elvhen makes so much sench, has it is kind of their tongue of truth and sincerity.

I love that Lavellan grew to be this person Solas could trust, and could be there for him, show compassion. She does not look submissive, but caring. She definitely is in control of the situation, and she chose to be here for him. Despite everything.

And again, the animation. The emotion in their looks. The tears in Solas' eyes.

The sadness of his gaze while he decide to take the hardest decision, and pay the consequences of his actions.

And while Rook and Morrigan look at him, proudly, there is this little frame.

Lavellan, smiling, lookind down. A bit of sadness in her eyes. I think it is the moment she realise that she have to take a decision. See him take his responsability, keeping him as dear memory, or leave everything to be by his side. And my head still remember what she said to him after the Well of Sorrow mission : " No matter what, you will be by my side. ".

I am not upsed by the ending. This is exactly what I had envision before the release of Veilguard.

Sure, Solas was the victime of Mythal abuse, but the pain and suffering he caused around him were all from decisions he took freely. He needed to make amend, and not a sacrificial reparation. The decision is even harder as it mirrors his fear that we know. Dying alone.

Every other ending is painful to watch when you remember that.

So for him to take his responsability, knowing that he would lead him to a life of solitude. Only, when he chose this path, with the end that awaits him, does it makes sens that the Inquisitor offer to follow him. The world is saved, she leave it in the good hands of people she trust, and she deserve to finally take a break.

And again, the game let you decide if you want to follow him, you can have a Lavellan who think that it was too much for her. But to me, it is the culminent point of their story taking a mythical level.

«– Ar ghilas vir banal. »

Solas speaking elvhen sounds so beautiful. Again, he rejects her, telling her that only terrible thing awaits her if she follow him. He wants to protect her, she doesn't have to face the same consequences as him, she has done nothing but trying to repare his mistakes. I think it shows that he still care, that he would not make her selfishly take the same burden as him.

I know, it is not a grand gesture, but the way he looks at her. I do believe she means everything to him.

And the kiss was so soft. I think us, solavellan fan are not use to it. And it bugged me also, as we had in the past more intimate scene. I think I would have prefere if he at least hugged her while kissing. Still, I think it goes well with the caring and softness of Lavellan, in this specific situation, who is in front of a bruised man.

I kind of count on the artist to make something more emotional.

So far, I enjoyed the ending, I just have a problem with the execution, and now that I am writting all of it, I realise that I even enjoyed the cinematic, I just think I was expecting more. A Trespasser level ending, that would feel more personal.

But I am also in peace with the ending, this is exactly what I wanted for them, and I am sure that they will make of this fade prison a special place for them to grow happy.

And again, thanks to the Solavellan fan to provide us with content that should be in the game. The way he looks at her :

I think this picture alone help me make peace with the end.

And I will just finish with my Lavellan and Rook smiling. I love them so much.

[pulluppuddles]

initiation

cw: manipulation, intoxication, gaslighting, omorashi, pet/puppy play,

at first, it seemed rly cool that the gorgeous sorority president on campus had invited u, a brand new freshman, to be her date to the greek life halloween party...u were anxious but oblivious as she introduced u to her sorority sisters while keeping a tight grip on ur waist, leading u around as she kept casually filling ur glass and encouraging u to drink...

it wasnt long before the alcohol caught up with ur bladder and ur brain...she was talking to the president of the frat club when it hit u...u needed to pee...now!

a small whimper escaped u as u clenched all the muscles in ur body and gradually, the urgency subsided... blushing, u try to duck out of her grip, sluring about needing the bathroom

she grips ur waist tighter and pulls u back, smirking..."excuse me, did u ask?"

u look up at her bewildered and suddenly, she pushes u against the wall, knee between ur legs, grinding against ur puppy parts

u cant help but let out a small moan as more partygoers turn to watch. she puts on a fake sympathy look and coos "aweee whats the matter pet? u know u've always had to ask before u leave my side, why would it be okay for u to disobey me now? did u think i wouldnt punish u here, in front of all of them?"

ur so drunk...so confused...is this true? u rly cant afford to think too hard about it rn as its taking everything u've got not to relieve urself and the constant rubbing of her knee on ur puppy parts isnt making it any easier

suddenly her knee is gone and u have to scramble to press ur legs together. she leads u outside where the party continues. there's a pool in the backyard and the sounds of the splashing r too much. u double over, holding ur crotch as everything in ur body screams for relief and u begin to leak.

suddenly u feel breath on ur ear and a soft growl tells u to piss urself. u want to resist but u cant help it, even as u hold urself, tendrils r snaking down ur legs. ur pissing ur pants in front of everyone. u start to cry as u continue to pee, everyone watching and smirking at u.

after what seems like forever, ur bladder is empty and she leads u back inside. everyone stares and smirks, hushed tones mentioning the sororitys new pet.

she leads u through the house to her bedroom, a metal cage with a big dog bed in it and warns u that this is ur bed and if u ruin it u wont get another.

she proceeds to strip u and clean u up, tsking at the slick in your underwear. "look how leaky u r pet" u blush as she lays u down on ur back in the cage and pulls on a pair of medical gloves

"now, be good or i will bind ur hands and feet. this is happening whether u fight it or not" u don't have a chance to wonder what that means before her hands wander down between ur legs and begin a thorough investigation of ur puppyparts

it isnt long before her soft touch has u foaming at the mouth, whining and pleading for more. she smirks and shuts the door of the cage...ur cage... "have sweet dreams pet" she purrs as she closes the door and returns to the party

[webslingingslasher]

i’m seated for some sneak peaks of things you have in the drafts hehe

here's a blurb for munch frat!peter:

'hand this card to the last person to eat pussy.'

tarrent has a gleam in his eye as he proudly pushes it into peter's chest. 'drink up, bro.'

you're not watching, the content of your cup is more interesting. but you're listening to see exactly how peter plays this one off because he hasn't even tried- let alone offered to go down on you.

peter hands the card back. 'nah, i don't do that.' he says it like it's a joke and his friends laugh with him, like he's too humble to accept the crown title of carpet muncher.

---

here's a blurb for hockey!peter fighting for his life over a jersey

'hey, can i have a kiss?' the audacity. you cross your arms again and look to the side, 'no.' peter frowns, you lean away when you feel his lips on your cheek.

'no? not even after i just won?'

'you didn't deserve it.' you grumble it from the side of your mouth, peter catches it and feels offended. 'don't get pouty and tell me i deserved to lose.'

you turn to him, your eyes screamed fire at him. 'don't humilate me and demand a kiss then.'

---

here's a blurb for cherry!peter who's doing the best he can to make cherry's sex dream come to life

'i've been so good, haven't i been so good for you?' peter can sense a little bit of a praise kink in you, it's fitting. 'you're always good for me. you're my good girl, aren't you?'

a whimper, it's so much better when it's real. 'i'm your good girl.' a harsh grind, you clutch peter's forearm while you throw your head back. 'yeah? that feels good?'

'call me your pretty baby.' peter doesn't know where the direction is coming from but he likes it. 'does my pretty baby feel good?' an audible moan, he's fucking perfect at this.

---

here's a blurb for bf!frat!peter with a girlfriend who should always come first

peter is totally saving you for last and you're about to go nuts on him. sure, there might be a line of people and sure, you might be the one in the least danger but you're owed some sort of urgency.

'hello?' you call it out, you sound impatient. 'spider-man?' you are impatient. you call for him again, he holds up a hand and you gasp. 'oh you little- spider-man, you better come help me right now or i swear to god i'll...' you have no real threat. 'just don't tempt me!'

peter doesn't come help you, he's still helping an older woman and you're about to throw yourself into a fire for some attention. 'excuse me? i'm looking for my boyfriend, have you seen him?'

---

here's a blurb from that blurb... you know... the one where peter has hooked up with trouble's friend?

if peter was a brat, he'd say that you're not supposed to be talking to him. instead, he extends his hand out and watches heavy footing beat up the staircase. the second his door slams, his best friend is asking what the fuck happened with his eyes.

'she's mad at me.' his door swings open, you shout down to him. 'i'm not mad! we're broken up!' another slam. ethan's expecting a lot more from peter than a shrug. 'no we're not.'

his door hits the wall, another scream, 'yes we are!' a third slam, this time, he's got two friends coming out of their rooms and glancing between his bedroom door and the lower level where peter had crossed arms.

'what's going-' peter flails his arms around, trying to stop the impending question and what he knows is all you need to give him a round two, but worse because now you're no longer in public.

a sheepish grin crosses over a brother's face when his door explodes open, peter thinks there might be a hole behind his door where the handle matches up perfectly.

---

here's a blurb where ethan walks in on sexy time :(

'liar! he saw me from behind!' you know he did, it was all on show. everything's ruined. peter's trying his best to be soothing. 'hey, even if he did, he won't say anything. it's ethan, you know ethan.'

you do. that's why it's so bad. the reminder makes you cry harder, peter connects the dots. 'oh jeez, trouble. here, come give me a hug.' it's a pathetic reach, you want nothing more than to be locked away in his hold, hidden and secret from the outside world.

'he-' you suck in air, curling in even closer to peter as if you weren't on his lap already. 'he saw me having sex.' you pull peter's arms tighter around you, it almost hurts it's so tight. it's what you need.

'i know, baby. i'm so sorry.' at least he's being honest.

'how much did he see?' peter doesn't know either, he was a little busy underneath you. he just knows the second he saw his door open, his instinct was to protect you.

'very little.' you feel kisses over your head, 'please stop crying.'

---

here's a blurb where nerdy!peter has no filter when he's drunk

'hi, honey.' you hold his arm tightly, 'don't lean over.' bending at the waist you reach for the keys, peter groans and shouts an exaggerated 'oh my god!'

you fly up, the metal tucked between your fingers. 'what?' you look around, peter's busy staring down your skirt while his teeth sink into his bottom lip. 'your ass is so nice.'

you suck in a deep breath and ignore the flush of warmth covering your chest. 'thank you, petey.' you ignore the slight shake in your hand when you shove the key in.

peter's door gets stuck a lot and you have to shove your shoulder into it a little. while you're doing your best to raid the door, a hand slides up the back of your thigh and gives you a tight squeeze. you jump and yelp, your hand reaching back to throw his off.

'peter!' he giggles and turns his head like you wouldn't be able to see him anymore. 'i just wanted to touch it a little.' peter's fingertips lightly drag up your thigh, you slap it away again. he giggles harder, the sound bubbles out of him.

'i'm trying to get us inside, leave my butt alone.' you have his promise, and you nudge the door a little, a sharp smack has you wipping around to face him. peter shoots his hands up, 'last one, i promise! that was the last one!'

[cheynovak]

Complicated

Characters: Soldier boy x Y/N Female character     

Summary: Y/N, a young personal assistant to Soldier Boy (Ben) and Crimson Countess, is caught in a whirlwind of events that shatter her sense of stability. After accidentally witnessing an intimate moment between Ben, Crimson, and another woman, she’s left shaken and unsure how to process it. The following day, Crimson casually invites her to join them, which only adds to Y/N's confusion.

Warnings: 18+ Threesome, cheating, smut

English is not my first language 

*This story is my own original story, please do not copy my work, reblog/comments/likes are appreciated* 

part 2/?

I drove back to my office, not knowing where else to go. My, our apartment was no longer a refuge—it was tainted, just like everything else. The small couch in my workspace was uncomfortable, but it was better than facing the wreckage of my life back home. I curled up on it, hugging a pillow, tears silently streaming down my face. I had never felt so alone.

Eventually, exhaustion took over, and I drifted in and out of a fitful sleep, crying even in my dreams. Every now and then, I'd wake up to the sound of my own quiet sobs, the weight of everything pressing down on me.

At some point in the night, I felt something, someone, touching my hair. I stirred, disoriented and groggy. For a split second, I thought maybe it was a dream, but then I saw him.

Kevin.

He was standing there, his hand gently stroking my hair as if he had every right to be there, as if nothing had happened. The sight of him sent a surge of anger and panic through me, and I bolted upright, screaming.

"Get out! Leave! Now!"

Kevin looked shocked, he tried to calm me down while I kept yelling, he was telling me all the things he thought I wanted to hear, pretending this was the first time he cheated but that was a lie, I knew it deep down.

Then I heard a deep, calm voice from behind me.

"Is there a problem here?"

I turned, and there he was, Soldier Boy. My screaming must have been so loud he heard it at the top floor where his penthouse was. Or he's just happened to walk by.

His imposing figure stood in the doorway, arms crossed, his expression hard. His eyes shifted between Kevin and me, quickly assessing the situation. He must've noticed my red, tear-streaked face because his gaze darkened, and I could see the tension ripple through him.

Kevin opened his mouth, likely to make some excuse or explanation, but Ben cut him off with a single, cold command.

"Leave."

The word hung in the air like a threat, and Kevin hesitated for only a second before backing down. He gave me one last guilty look before slipping out of the room. The door clicked shut behind him, leaving an eerie silence in its wake.

I was still sitting on the couch, my body tense, my mind reeling from everything that had just happened. Ben stayed standing for a moment, watching me. He wasn’t smiling, his usual cocky, teasing attitude gone. Instead, his expression was unreadable, almost concerned.

After a long pause, he walked over and sat down beside me on the couch. He didn’t say anything right away. The room was so quiet I could hear my own ragged breathing.

For the first time since everything had gone so wrong, I didn’t feel like I was drowning. His presence, solid and calm, was grounding me in a way I didn’t expect.

As I sat there, tears still rolling down my cheeks, Ben shifted slightly beside me. Before I could react, he pulled me into his arms. My body tensed at first, but then I melted into the warmth of his chest, my cheek pressing against the firm muscle beneath his shirt. The quiet hum of his heartbeat was the only thing I could focus on as the sobs came again, uncontrollable and raw.

I didn’t hold back this time. I blurred out everything, the pain, the humiliation, the betrayal. "He cheated on me," I choked out between sobs, "and I was so stupid… I really thought he loved me." My voice cracked on the last word, and fresh tears poured down.

Ben didn’t say a word. He didn’t offer any comforting reassurances or tell me everything would be okay. He just sat there, letting me cry, holding me like he had no idea what to do but felt obligated to be there.

His arms weren’t tight around me, just loosely draped as if he were holding something fragile he didn’t really want to break but didn’t quite know how to handle. It was awkward in a way, like he didn’t want to get too close, but he didn’t want to pull away either.

For some reason, that made it worse. I felt small in his arms, insignificant, like this whole emotional outburst was just another inconvenience for him. I shouldn’t have cared, but it made me feel even more broken. My chest ached, my throat raw from crying, and I didn’t know what to say, so I mumbled the only thing I could think of.

“I’m sorry…”

I pulled back just slightly, enough to look up at him, my face still wet with tears. His expression was unreadable, his eyes dark, intense, watching me with something I couldn’t quite place. Before I could process it, before I could even think, his hand gripped my chin firmly, and suddenly, his lips were on mine.

It wasn’t soft, or tender, it was forceful, rough, a kiss that left no room for doubt or hesitation. My body froze in shock, my mind going blank as I registered what was happening. This wasn’t what I needed. This wasn’t what I had asked for.

I almost leaned into it, almost let myself fall into the moment, but something inside me snapped back to reality. My hands instinctively pressed against his chest, pushing him away, breaking the kiss.

I pulled back, wide-eyed, breathless, and completely overwhelmed. I stared at him, my mind racing, trying to make sense of what had just happened. Ben’s gaze was still locked on me, his breathing steady, but there was a flicker of something unreadable in his eyes something dark and unrepentant.

I didn’t know what to say. My mind screamed at me to leave, to run, but I was frozen in place, caught between fear, confusion, and the weight of everything that had happened.

Without thinking twice, my anger toward Kevin surged like a wave, and before I could stop myself, I crashed my lips back against his. The heat between us ignited quickly, our tongues battling for control, the intensity of it all erasing any hesitation I had just moments ago. It wasn’t about passion, it was about drowning out the hurt, the betrayal.

For a minute or two, we were lost in that raw, reckless kiss.

Then Ben pulled back, a glint in his eyes as he grinned, still holding my hand. “Let’s get you some revenge,” he said, his voice low and filled with something dark.

My breath hitched as he tugged me to my feet, leading me toward the elevator. My mind spun, still trying to catch up with what was happening, but part of me—part of me wanted this, needed this.

The idea of payback, of forgetting Kevin, made me follow without question. A night with Soldier boy was something a lot of women would sell their soul for.

When the elevator doors opened into his penthouse, I was hit with a rush of nerves, a gnawing feeling deep in my gut. The space was grand, just as I’d expect from Soldier Boy, but what made my stomach drop was who was waiting for us.

Crimson Countess.

She stood by the window, dressed in something slinky and red, her lips curling into a wicked smile when she saw us enter. "Well, you brought company." The knowing look in her eyes made it clear she knew exactly what was happening, what Ben had brought me here for.

My heart raced as realization hit me like a brick. This wasn’t just about me and Ben. His intentions became clear.

“Oh no, I… I’ve never done anything like this,” I stammered, feeling completely out of my depth, my skin tingling with a mix of fear and something I didn’t want to admit.

Ben didn’t miss a beat. He sat on the bed, leaning back casually, watching me with that same confident, predatory gleam in his eyes. Crimson stepped up behind me, close enough that I could feel her breath on my neck.

“That’s okay,” Ben murmured, his voice low, coaxing. “She’ll teach you anything you want. We can take it slow.”

I swallowed hard, my mind spinning. Everything about this felt wrong and right all at once, the pull of anger and the need to numb my pain warring inside me.

I had never been in a situation like this, never imagined myself here, but the bitterness I felt toward Kevin and the desire to hurt him the way he’d hurt me clouded my judgment.

Crimson’s soft voice whispered behind me. " This will be fun." Ben added “Don’t you want payback on, what’s-his-name?”

“Kevin,” I muttered, my voice shaky. My breath hitched as she lightly ran her fingers down my arm.

Ben smiled, his eyes gleaming as he leaned forward on the bed. “Right. And what better revenge than spending a night with not just one, but two superior beings?”

My pulse raced, my body caught between fear and something I didn’t want to admit. The temptation to get back at Kevin was so strong, the anger still boiling inside me. The words danced in my mind—payback, revenge, forgetting the pain—and I was so close to giving in.

Ben's eyes were locked on me, challenging me. Crimson’s hands lightly brushed my shoulders, her touch warm, inviting.

But was this really the kind of revenge I wanted?

--

The answer was yes.

I gave in to the pull of revenge, the need to drown out the hurt Kevin had caused me. Ben kept his word, taking it slow, easing me into a world I had never imagined I’d be part of. I had a little to drink first, and another, just enough to blur the sharp edges of my anxiety.

Crimson made the first move, her touch soft but confident. Ben just sat there, relaxed, watching me as I explored the sensation of another woman’s body for the first time.

Crimson was clear about what she liked, guiding me with a kind of experienced patience that made it easier for me to follow. I couldn’t say I truly enjoyed it, it was more surreal than anything. But my body responded, either to her touch or to the way Ben’s gaze burned into me as he watched, his eyes following every movement, every reaction I had, playing with himself while smoking a blunt.

I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol, or the way he looked at me, but after a while, I found myself giving in. When Crimson brought me to my first orgasm, my mind clouded with the strange mix of guilt and release. She smiled, satisfied with herself, and then leaned back, her voice sultry as she said, “I want to try something else, I'll be right back."

I was still lying on my back, catching my breath, my mind spinning in ways I couldn’t control. I looked up at Ben, feeling more exposed than ever under his intense stare.

Without hesitation, he grabbed me by the arm and pulled me up, straddling him in a swift motion that made my heart race. His hands slid over my naked form, fingers brushing my skin in a way that made me shiver despite myself.

"I thought you were a little nun," he teased, his voice low and teasing, his lips hovering near my ear. "A virgin waiting till her wedding night."

I bit my lip, my mind a mess of thoughts and emotions. The guilt, the anger, the desire to forget—it all mixed together until I couldn’t tell one feeling from another.

Ben's lips brushed my ear again, his voice even lower this time, dripping with confidence. "You need a man to really enjoy it, don’t you?"

I nodded quickly, too overwhelmed to speak. His grip tightened on my hips, and for a second, I felt like I was teetering on the edge of something dangerous, something I couldn’t come back from.

Ben’s hands gripped my hips firmly, guiding me with deliberate slowness until I felt him pressing against me. In his hand he didn't seemed all too big, but brushing against me made me beg to differ.

Just an inch, and I gasped, my head falling back as a rush of sensation overwhelmed me. He was big, too big. My body tensed, trying to adjust to the feeling, but even through the discomfort, there was something undeniably intoxicating about it.

I could feel his eyes on me, the heat of his gaze as he studied my every reaction. His hands never let go of my hips, controlling my movements as he slowly pushed deeper, inch by inch. I tried to stay focused, my breathing ragged as my body started to respond in ways I wasn’t expecting.

My face was close to his now, my hands resting on his broad neck near his hair for balance, finger tugging at his hair. I could hear his breathing, steady but deep, as he helped me move up and down, guiding me to take him deeper, bit by bit.

The sensation was overwhelming, my mind a blur of thoughts and sensations. I couldn’t think about anything else, not Kevin, not the mess my life had become, just the way my body was reacting, the way Ben’s hands felt on me, the way he filled me. It was too much, and not enough all at once.

As I moved on him, Ben’s voice was a low, sultry murmur, sending shivers down my spine. “That’s it, just like that,” he encouraged, his breath warm against my ear. “Feel how good this is? You’re doing amazing.”

He shifted slightly, guiding my hips. “You’re so tight… just let go and let me take you there.”

I could feel his hands tightening on my waist as he thrust deeper. “You like that, don’t you? You were made for me.” His eyes locked onto mine, filled with an intensity that made me blush.

Ben’s voice was low and commanding as he talked, guiding my movements with an intensity that made my heart race. I caught a glimpse of his eyes flicking to something behind me—probably Crimson returning—but his attention remained solely on me. He was in control, and I was swept along for the ride, unable to dictate the speed or the rhythm of his thrusts.

“Just focus on me. Let me show you how good it can feel.”

Each word dripped with a mix of dominance and allure, making it impossible for me to resist. “I want to see you fall apart, to feel every inch of me,” he growled, urging me on as I lost myself in the moment.

As pleasure built, he leaned closer, his lips brushing my ear. “You’re perfect like this. Just let it take over.” And when I finally reached that edge, he whispered, “That’s it… let go for me.”

With each deep thrust, I felt myself teetering on the edge, overwhelmed by the sensations coursing through me. I lost track of time as pleasure built, wave after wave crashing over me until I finally tipped over the edge, spiraling into a blissful release. It hit me again and again, each pulse sending me higher, until finally, I felt him reach his own climax, his breath ragged against my skin.

As the aftershocks settled, I glanced at Crimson. She wore a look that suggested she wasn’t entirely pleased, but in that moment, I didn’t care. I was too worn out, my body buzzing with the remnants of ecstasy.

Eventually, I found a comfortable position on Ben's left side, feeling the warmth of his body next to me. Crimson settled on his right, and the exhaustion washed over me, pulling me into a deep sleep. In that moment, I let go of everything—the hurt, the betrayal—and surrendered to the darkness.

--

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[faithandfairies]

You know, Rizzoli & Isles is interesting. There are moments where the characters are completely in denial about how they feel about each other. But then there are moments where they themselves are very self-aware and can't ignore their own feelings.

Another one of those moments is when Jane jumps off that bridge in 5x12. They frame it as Maura simply being afraid because she almost lost her best friend Jane. But then Maura herself shows awareness of believing it being more than that.

She's so overcome she almost starts crying when she hugs Jane after she is found and then walks off because she was scared she almost lost Jane.

Then Maura herself pretty much tells us she was struggling with her feelings towards Jane almost dying again in front of her eyes. And Maura being Maura she basically tells us in her Maura way that she was looking for a logical explanation for her feelings that wasn't her simply being in love with Jane while being in a relationship with a dude.

It's in everything in that conversation between Jane and Maura after Jane is found. It's in the way Maura looks at Jane, that same look she gave Jane on that bridge only now that they're alone she isn't trying to hide it at all. It's in what she says to Jane, it's in her mannerisms. Everything in that scene screams "I'm in love with you and I don't know what to do with myself because of it."

And then Jane tells her it's survivor guilt and that drives home what's been going through Maura's mind. Because then Maura puts distance between her and Jane, hell she puts a whole desk between her and Jane after she first says "Excuse me?" followed by "Why didn't I think of that?" in this thoughtful way that underlines that she was attributing her strong emotions to being in love with Jane. But now has a more logical explanation to grasp onto as well as being once again clear on the fact that she and Jane aren't on the same page.

And Jane was doing so well too, buying Maura her favorite super expensive perfume. I am convinced that if Jane had asked Maura out in that moment or had confessed romantic feelings for Maura and expressed an interest in pursuing a romantic relationship with her Maura would have either said "yes" or "I need to think about it because I'm in love with you and loving you means being accepting of the dangers that come with your job and I need time to accept that" or something.

This show, it's always Maura that's aware that she's in love with Jane and Jane being the one that's in denial.

But it's so interesting because Jane is not completely oblivious. She has extremely quick wit and is insanely observant. She is a detective and excellent at her job. She can draw correct conclusions with a single look in anyone's direction and even more so when it comes to people she knows and loves. Unless her own limiting beliefs and assumptions get in the way that is. There is a reason Jane bought Maura her favorite insanely expensive perfume to say sorry and not something else. She knows Maura is in love with her and she didn't need her mother to spell Maura's feelings about her out to her. She did need someone to back up the "Maura's feelings are just friendly" story she's been telling herself though and her mother did just that.

[punktactical]

ASSHOLE , eustass kid ★

★

summary ; a one-night stand with kid, more emotion spills out than it should.

warnings ; 18+ content , smut , mutual - masturbation , eating out , controlling behavior , cursing , light angst , kid is bad at feelings , he's also a lil asshole

a/n ; this was originally taken from my quotev one-shots , so if u recognize it , u know why lol ! woohoo my first post , i hope it does well *clasps my hands together obnoxiously*

★

★

eustass kid is an asshole for sure.

that much could be said as he spat on her, grabbing her hips harshly.

"d - don't be so hard! it hurts." she whines, tears pricking her eyes as she pushes at his chest. he smacks her hand away, sneering at her. "don't tell me what to fucking do." he lifts up her dress, revealing her white, puffy bloomers.

"ya dress like a lil' girl." he shimmies her bloomers down to her knees, the fabric resting down her legs. her pink panties peek through from under her skirt. he reaches a large hand out to rub her, but she stops him shyly. "you said you wanted me to . . ." she looks away, embarrassed. " suck you off . " he grins, his gums showing from behind his lips. "so? i changed my mind, not like you get to decide what i do."

his thumb grazes her clothed cunt, making her suck in a breath. he licks her through her panties, saliva mixing with her slick. "oh, oh, eustass!" she gasps, squeezing her thighs around his head. he growls, his tongue pushing and prodding at her entrance. "you still got yer panties on, y'know? ya really gonna cum when i'm eating you out from behind yer panties?" she blushes, holding a small hand up to her open mouth. she sounds like she's about to cry, with the way she hiccups every so often. "besides, i needa get ya ready for my cock, it's big, y'know?" he laughs at her horrified expression. he pulls her panties to the side, his tongue diving into her wet cunt. she screams in delight, her fingers winding themselves up in his hair.

what wonders a guy with a rude mouth could do.

"eustass, i think - i'm gonna - !" her breath catches in her throat, a sharp shriek ripping through the air, he doesn't stop licking up her juices.

"then do it." he spits out between his sucking.

she grinds her teeth, screaming from behind them as she feels the waves of pleasure come crashing down onto her. her hands pull at his hair, tugging it harshly. he hisses, lapping up her juices quickly. her body is sweaty, the remaining clothes she had on sticking to her body. everything was so hot now, too hot. "take yer clothes off, i'ma jack myself to ya now. so get comfortable."

eustass kid is an asshole for sure.

that much could be said as he forced her clothes off, stroking himself as she watches with a red face.

★

"what's yer name?"

"excuse me?"

they both laid in bed next to each other, still naked. they weren't touching though. his hands resting on his stomach while hers were holding her hips. "i never got yer name." she frowns. "does that really matter now? i'll be gone as soon as the sun rises." she closes her eyes, enjoying the plushness of the sheets beneath her. "no, but i just wanted to know, i guess." he turns his head the other way, hiding his embarrassed blush. god, why did he care anyways? she hums. "you're not the most kind man, are you?" he huffs. "what's the point of being nice? i'm a pirate." she looks at him with drowsy eyes. "i suppose so but." she reaches out a hand, the back of her fingers grazing his cheek.

"you're not being a complete asshole, just a little mean." she smiles, watching as he scowls, a visible blush on his cheeks.

"if yer gone as soon as the sun rises just like you say, then."

"i'd like to . ." he hesitates.

"i want to hold you." he gulps.

"only if you want to." he sighs.

it was almost a relief as soon as the words left his mouth. her smile widened. she shuffles over, her smaller body curling into his own. his hand hand rests on her hip, but it's cold, no affection radiating from it.

the cool metal reminds her that she is nothing but one night.

eustass kid was an asshole.

that much could be said as he woke up the next morning, the other side of his bed empty. he'll look around, confused, unsure as to what happened last night and if he'll ever remember. the only thing to remind him is a small, crumpled up letter with a name on it. he thinks about writing the name down.

he thinks about sailing the ocean, looking for the person that the name belongs to.

he thinks about fighting through thousands of marines, to get to that name.

he thinks . . .

he rips the paper up, the flakes falling to the floor. his hand continues to tear the paper up, his human hand. the only hand that has flesh. the only hand that has meaning.

as he said, he was just a pirate. what's the point?

eustass kid is and always will be an asshole.

not much can be said.

★

[vrystalius]

How would sanemi react to his hashira crush dying in the final battle against muzan? Like she dies in his arms (similar to obamitsu). They confess their feelings, his crush thanks him for everything and tells him not to blame himself and to live a happy life once she’s gone. Sorry im just in the mood for a lot of angst! 😅

Sanemi loosing his crush in the final fight

Dying in his arms, trying to confess your feelings before you’re gone forever.

Pairing: Sanemi x hashira!fem!reader

(Heavy spoilers for Infinity Castle Arc)

“I-I’m sorry, Nemi…” Sanemi couldn’t believe his eyes. You were laying in his arms, bleeding out slowly. That damn six eyed freak kept targeting you over him, stabbing and slashing you over and over. He didn’t dare to look down at how your blood was draining out of you. He just stared at your face, your beautiful face. His eyes were blurry and he couldn’t stop sobbing.

“I’m sorry… I’m such a burden, hah…” You were smiling weakly at him, blood dripping down from your lips. Sanemi was shaking his head and pulled you closer, gripping onto your clothes for dear life “N-No, no! Y-You never were a burden!! You never were a p-pain!! F-Fuck-“ Sanemi was sobbing loudly while his salty tears fell onto your face. He roughly cupped your cheeks, pulling you closer. “I-I love you! I-I LOVE YO-YOU!! P-PLEASE, DON’T FUCKING DIE BEFORE ME!!” He screamed at your face.

You cupped his cheeks and wiped his ever returning tears away, your foreheads touching “I love you too, Nemi… you’re.. the best.. in the whole world…” Sanemi let out a guttural scream, yelling at the infinite halls above him. “I’M BEGGING YOU, GOD! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!” You felt your life force slowly slip out of between your fingers. “It’s okay, Nemi… be happy for me, okay?… We should… get married in our next..life…” You whispered while weakly holding onto Sanemi’s uniform, leaning your head against his chest. He sobbed and looked back down at you. Sanemi was shaking his head rapidly. “I-I can’t. I-I c-can’t- n-not without…” He couldn’t finish his sentence as his eyes widened.

Sanemi watched your expression turn more peaceful snd restful. You looked like you were simply asleep, but he knew better. He started hyperventilating and screamed at the skies above, sobbing.

“GRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!”

💠

I may or may not have cried multiple times or the whole time while writing this. I love Genya so much and I based this fic on his death, so I had the manga beside on the page where he dies, sooo… I am not ready for this death :(.

But don’t apologise for requesting, angst is one my favs >:)

Anyways, make sure to EAT, SLEEP and DRINM enough!

Take care of yourselves <3

Now if you’d excuse me, I gotta finish crying in peace.

[rorywritesjunk]

No longer locked upon the land but free on the rolling waves

You and Buggy come face to face with himself from the past, and while you’re fully accepting that this is your husband as a child, Buggy doesn’t want to accept it.

Rating: PG-13ish, but just due to some swearing.

Warning: Upset kid, upset husband. Reader is way too nice, doesn’t necessarily take husband’s feelings into account as well.

A/N: A combined request. I did a few versions of this story before feeling like it hit the marks I was wanting to hit. Also, I’m just trying to vibe off what I’ve seen of Kid Buggy. I’m no expert. I’d protect that kid with my life. He’s so adorable. I also like the trope of “Meeting your self from another time” and “gets turned back into kid-self”. This is the former, and I know shit about time travel but I just kind of made something up.

This is the last chapter with the epilogue at the end. This has been a lot of fun to write and I've enjoyed it so much, thank you all for reading it and replying! I've loved responding to you all. So thank you thank you thank you. I liked how this chapter wrapped things up. Moments go a little quick but that was the intention. Nothing was to really be drawn out.

Title comes from “Sailing Song” by S.J. Tucker.

Chapter 1 + Chapter 2 + Chapter 3 + Chapter 4 + Chapter 5 + Chapter 6/Epilogue

TAGLIST: @lostfirefly @misadventures0fdes @sylum @valen-yamyam16 @dohkyu @fluffybunnyu @skyofsteel @lavalampskyy @gingernut1314 @ane5e @madam-o @the-angriest-angel

Chapter Six

Your husband decided to stay back on the ship while you and the kid went into the town. His excuse was he needed to get the crew ready or something, but you didn’t push him for a real reason. Part of you wanted him with you when you went into town because you didn’t know what to expect. Would some kind of portal open up and tear the kid away from you, kicking and screaming, or would it happen in an instant, like when he first appeared? You were going to cry either way, you just wish you had some kind of idea of what to expect. 

But you also didn't want Buggy coming because again, what if some portal opened up and tore your husband away from you as well as the kid? You didn't want him disappearing on you at all so you just gave him a kiss on the cheek before heading off the ship with the kid.

“I think that the table was over here.” Kid Buggy said as he held your hand, leading you down a street. You knew what he was looking for but you let him take charge, wondering if he knew here to look. The table wouldn’t be there anymore, it hadn’t been since you turned 14 and left to start your apprenticeship and your parents moved elsewhere. They still made jewelry and sold it, but in another town on another island. 

It was hard not to tell him everything, because even though Buggy said he doesn’t remember anything about this whole ordeal, what if this was different? What if something was triggered that changed the course of the kid’s life from this moment forward? You didn’t want to take the risk. You loved your life, your husband, and the life you two had together. Nothing could change that, so you never told Kid Buggy that he stole from your parents, or that he would become a Devil Fruit user at a young age (he never questioned Buggy’s head popping off his body during their first meeting), nor did Buggy ever tell him what happened between him and Shanks. 

“You think so?” You replied as you followed after, smiling down at him as he turned his head in every direction, a look of concentration on his cute face as he tried to remember where to go. He stopped a few times, looking around, wondering where to turn. You were patient, giving his hand a squeeze whenever he’d start walking again.

“I’d bring you back with me if I could, y’know.” Buggy said as he looked up at you. “Introduce you to everyone. They’d think you were great.” He then looked away, searching for the table of merchandise that no longer existed. “But I know you wouldn’t wanna come with…”

“If I could come back to my husband in the end, I would.” You assured him with a smile. “But you’ve seen how you are as an adult, you can’t survive ten minutes without me, so I have to stay back with him.” Truthfully, if you met the crew, you would have brought hell down upon them. While your husband would speak highly of being an apprentice under Gold Roger, you had other opinions, ones that you wouldn’t share because you didn’t want to upset Buggy. There was always something under the surface whenever you listened to your husband speak about it. The self-doubt, fear of failure, everything, and one time when he was drunk he cried about Shanks, often feeling lesser than his friend, but then the next morning as he sobered up he would curse the same man. 

“Yea?” He grinned. “Really? I think you’d like it. You could even meet Shanks, since you said you never got to meet him.”

“Maybe something will happen and I can someday, Buggy.” You steered him out of the main walkway, letting people pass as you knelt down in front of him. “I want you to know that I have loved spending time with you, sweetie. It’s been one of the best things ever.”

He blushed at that, avoiding your gaze as he looked away. “Are you saying goodbye to me?”

“No! Not yet, just…” You hesitated. He wasn’t used to this kind of attention, the praise, compliments, affection even. You wanted to give him as much as you gave your husband because you saw the way he would brighten up when you’d tell Adult Buggy how handsome he looked in his coat while you’d straighten his cravat, or when you’d let him know how much you loved him every night before going to bed. You meant every word you spoke to Buggy as an adult, and you wanted him to know the same as a kid. “I want you to know you’re a wonderful kid, Buggy.”

He was still red in the face but he allowed you to wrap your arms around him and pull him into a hug. He mumbled something in response and you didn’t quite hear it, because he suddenly pulled away from you, his eyes lighting up in excitement.

“I can hear Shanks!” He said as he looked over your shoulder. “I think he’s calling for me!”

You turned in the same direction but didn’t see or hear anything. What was going on? He grinned at you before he suddenly took off running in the direction he was looking. You got to your feet and started after him, but he was fast. He turned down an alleyway, calling for Shanks, and when you finally caught up to him your heart dropped. It was a dead end and he was nowhere in sight. 

So this is how it ended then.

~

You came back to the ship an hour later and went right to your room, ignoring the looks of the crew and even your husband. He noticed you were alone, so he told the first mate to keep an eye on things while he went after you. Buggy wasn't sure how upset you would be, because even after ten years of marriage he wasn't sure how to handle it.

He found you sitting on the bed, leaning back against the headboard with something in your hand. Buggy hung his coat and hat up before taking his boots off and climbing into bed next to you. You immediately leaned into him, curling up against his side as he put his arm around you.

“I'm going to miss seeing you as a kid.” You sniffled, looking at the once stolen pendant in your hand. “You were so sweet, Buggy.”

“I was a little shit.” He rolled his eyes, clearly having a different opinion on the whole matter. You looked up at him with watery eyes and he sighed. “Fine, yes, I was a sweet little shit.”

“I just wanted you to feel safe and loved, Buggy.” You wiped at the tears as they rolled down your cheeks. “And you're not going to remember any of it.  What was the point of any of this?”

He just shrugged, pulling you closer as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head. He wasn't really good at using words to comfort you. He was used to actions like giving you gifts or finding ways to make you laugh instead. He hated seeing you so upset, but he knew better than to tell you to suck it up and move on. The one time he said that to you ended up with you giving him the cold shoulder for a week and he couldn't deal with that again.

“I just wanted you to be okay, Buggy.” You mumbled as you tucked the pendant away in your pocket. “I hate you went through so much before we met.” You rubbed your eyes. “And…and you're not going to remember any of this.”

“Yea, well…” He hated saying sappy things, like something out of a silly romance novel. He sighed and gritted his teeth. “If I didn't become an apprentice and continue being a pirate, we wouldn't have met.” You glanced up at him and his cheeks started to turn red. “The kid will be fine, because he will meet some way too nice tailor, fall madly in love with her and be an idiot about it, and she will show him all the love he will ever need.” He huffed and pulled his arm away from you, crossing them over his chest as he looked away. He felt a little uncomfortable but he knew you needed to hear this. “And when they hug for the first time he'll remember a moment of feeling safe as a kid but he won't know why, and when they kiss for the first time it will make him realize how much he wants her in his life.” He took a deep breath and exhaled before scowling. “Okay? So… so the kid won't remember what you did for him but he'll have a sense of familiarity when he meets his future wife, because she treats him with kindness and never asks for anything in return, and he really doesn't deserve someone like her.”

When he was finished with his rant he looked down at you, only to be horrified when he saw new tears streaming down your cheeks. Oh shit. He didn't mean to make you cry.

“S-Sorry, I didn't mean to-” He was at a loss for words. “Why are you-”

“R-Really?” You whimpered. “You felt that way when we met?”

He turned even redder if possible, unsure if he should keep talking or not, but you were almost smiling now as the tears rolled down your cheeks so he sighed and nodded.

“Y-Yes.” He said, looking away from you once more. “I… I knew the moment you gave me a hug that you and I were meant to be, because I felt safe in your arms and… and you took good care of me even before we started our relationship.” He scratched his cheek, looking so very uncomfortable to be carrying on like this, but your crying was letting up and you were looking at him with such love in your eyes that he thought he was going to literally fall to pieces in front of you. “Fixing my coat, clothes, even my gloves. It… it was nice and you didn't have to do that because I wasn't the nicest person to you at times, y’know.”

“I fixed your gloves just to spend extra time talking to you.” You said, giggling as you wiped your eyes with the hem of your shirt. He looked at you in confusion. “I made it up that your gloves needed fixing. I just… wanted to spend time with you after fixing other things, and you didn't know what I was talking about so you let me.” You smiled brightly at him. “I lied because I liked you, Buggy.”

His jaw dropped, a look of betrayal on his face. “What?! You lied?!”

You laughed. “What? I liked seeing your hands without them, honey, because you always wore them. That was the first time I felt your hands without gloves on, you know.”

“I can’t believe you lied!” He wouldn’t drop that tiny detail. “After all this time you lied about my gloves needing to be fixed?”

You knew what he was doing, trying to distract you from being upset, and you appreciated it. It still hurt having the kid disappear so quickly out of your sight but it was a comfort to hear from your husband the little bits he could recall, even if it wasn’t exact moments of his time with you. You didn’t want him to be hurt, or go through the heartaches of growing up, but if it meant the two of you meeting and falling in love, then maybe you could accept that you couldn’t fix everything.

“I love you, Buggy.” You told him as you leaned over to kiss his cheek. He turned red and looked away again but he put his arm back around you, pulling you closer to him before he looked back at you. 

“Yea, yea.” He kissed you on the forehead and sighed. “I love you too.”

~*~*~

“Buggy! Where’ve ya been?” One of the older crewmen asked. Buggy didn’t turn around, instead looking at his now empty hands. Where did the pendant go? He just snatched it off that table and he had it in his hands just moments ago, but now it was missing. Did he somehow drop it? “It’s been twenty minutes, kid! Don’t take off like that!”

He glared up at the man. “Not my fault you can’t keep up with me!”

The man just laughed and patted him on the head; the kid immediately swatted at his hand, trying to get him to stop. He didn’t take off running, he had just been with the crew and then it seemed like everything went still for a moment. He didn’t want to say anything so he kept quiet, trailing after the adult as they went to join up with the others. 

“We weren’t too worried, y’know. Figured you’d turn up once you got hungry.” 

Buggy just nodded, glaring at the ground as he walked along. It’s not like he disappeared or anything. He was just out of sight for a few minutes. Shanks and him did it all the time. 

They were walking down the street that the vendor was on where he took the pendant from. Did they somehow get it back? He hesitated but risked taking a look as they walked by. The adults were talking to a customer, showing off pieces while a girl around Buggy’s age sat nearby, looking completely bored. When their eyes met she perked up a bit and gave him a big smile. Buggy made a face and looked away  but the adult he was with noticed the exchange and laughed.

“Flirtin’ with the local girls, Buggy?”

“Shut up!” He snapped. “Let’s get back to the ship!”

“Don’t you want to say bye to your girlfriend?” He teased as Buggy glared at him, his face red. He was about to say something else when something tugged on his sleeve. He spun around, ready to fight, but froze when he saw the girl standing there, holding a flower in her hand with a big smile on her face. 

“The red flower looks like your nose.” She told him as she took his hand and placed the flower in it. “I like it.”

Buggy didn’t say anything as his hand closed around the flower. He was frozen where he stood, not sure how to respond to that, but the moment didn’t last because she turned and went back to her parents, taking her seat near the table once more. He didn’t know what to say or do next, but the adult grabbed him by the back of his shirt and pulled him along, laughing and joking about young love and other stupid shit Buggy didn’t care about. He stuck the flower in his pocket and looked back at her once more, his face still as red as his nose. She was watching him leave and gave him a smile and wave as he left. 

Yea, okay, he decided she was kind of nice, but he wouldn’t see her again so there was no point in saying hi to her or asking her name.

 It was just a one time meeting by chance.

[strniohoeee]

Not Mine

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: A glimpse into the rise and downfall of Y/N’s relationship. Torn between wanting to move on with her life, but also wanting to relive the past. Constantly struggling, but will she figure it out in the end?🫂

Warnings⚠️: None really just get your tissue boxes ready😔. This one’s longggg too LOLLL

Song for the imagine: Strange- Celeste

Isn’t it strange

How people can change

From strangers to friends

Friends into lovers

And strangers again?

Day 374

Another day slipping from my fingers. My breathing shallow as my eyes blinked slowly. Staring out my bedroom window as the rain trickled down the glass offering me a reflection of who I hated.

I’d like to think I’m numb to the feeling at this point, but everytime I hear his name, or see his face my chest physically hurts. Some sick and twisted part of me indulged in this feeling. I wanted to feel pain. I thrived off of it. I mean it makes us stronger in the end doesn’t it?

200 days pondering. I’ve spent 200 days trying to scoop my life together. When you’re left with no true explanation your mind tends to go overboard. Filling the cracks with reasons and excuses that you were never given.

He wasn’t mine, and I was so blind to it. Trying to fix someone who so badly didn’t care. Too blind by infatuation to see how he truly felt.

Day 180

“I just don’t understand why” I stated staring down at my empty cup

“You can’t sit here and try to figure out someone who was never even open to you fully in the first place” my friend said to me

“I mean I know, but why give me this false hope. Make it seem like you saw a future with me. When he didn’t” I said swallowing thickly

“It’s been 6 days, do not beat yourself up over it okay? You’re killing yourself trying to rack your brain looking for the whys?” She said caressing my arm

“ I reached out to him yesterday” I said sniffling

“And?” She asked looking at me with a soft smile

“He said he couldn’t see me this weekend, but maybe another time” I replied breaking down

“Please don’t cry okay, you’re going to be okay” she said pulling me and hugging me

Day 374

I got up from my chair and walked out to my living room. I inhaled a shaky breath as I looked around the dimly lit room. My eyes landed on my coffee table. I trembled at the sight of the Polaroids of us littered along the mahogany wood, the vase he got me with nothing in it, and the books he purchased for me.

I started to breathe heavily and my hands began to shake.

“I HATE YOU” I screamed, shoving everything off the table with my fists. Breaking down as I heard the glass shatter and the books tumble down

“I hate your stupid fuck boy hair cut, I hate your cold blue eyes, I hate your stupid dry skin and your cracked lips, I hate your ugly smile….I HATE YOU” I screamed the last part as I banged my fists on the table

Dry heaving from the panic attack I was putting myself through.

Day 1

My eyes browsed the pastry display as I waited in line. These all looked so good, and it was hard to pick just one, but finally my eyes landed on the last heart shaped cookie on the rack

“Next!” I heard someone yell out, my eyes darting their way

“Good morning” I said offering a smile

“Good morning! What can I get for you today” the older woman said smiling at me

“May I have a small hot latte, and the heart shaped cookie right there” I said pointing over to the glass

“Sure thing honey” she said ringing me up

After paying she turned around and began to make my latte while I waited.

As I waited I felt a presence next to me, so I looked over locking eyes with a pair of blue ones. I offered him a smile and he returned the favor

“One latte and one heart cookie” the woman said handing me my stuff

“Thank you” I said grabbing my stuff and smiling at her

“Have a good day” she said

“You too” I replied and began to walk away, nodding my head at the guy who was next to me

I left the cafe and walked to the bookstore down the road. I was browsing around when I decided to walk into the horror aisle

I was looking at some books, mindlessly walking sideways when I bumped into someone.

“Oh sorry” I said looking up, and meeting those same blue eyes

“You’re good” he said smiling at me

“I was walking while looking at the books” I said looking over at the shelves

“You’re heart shaped cookie girl” he said pointing at me

“That would be me” I said laughing

“Those are my favorite, and you got the last one” he said fake pouting

“Would you like it?” I asked him offering him the bag

“Oh no no, thank you though” he said with his hand on his chest

“So you like horror too?” I asked him

“Uhhh no” he said laughing at bit

“Well then I think you’re in the wrong aisle” I said giggling

“I actually don’t read” he said putting his hands in his pockets

“Then why are you at a bookstore?” I asked tilting my head

“Well I like to look at the covers, I’m more of a visual type of guy” he replied

“Ahhh makes sense” I said nodding my head

“But uh don’t let me stop you from looking” he said stepping away from the shelf

I nodded at him and began to look at some books. My eyes landed on a Stephen King book, and I grabbed it immediately

“I’m going to have a seat at those tables and read this book a bit, you can join if you’d like” I said looking over at the boy

“I wouldn’t want to infiltrate” he said back

“Oh no never, join me” I stated smiling at him

We sat at the table, and I took the cookie out of the bag breaking it in half.

“Have half” I said looking up at him

“No don’t worry” he said nodding at me

“Please I insist” I said handing him the cookie

Finally he obliged and began to eat it. We sat chatting for a while about random stuff. When suddenly my phone rang, and I realized I was late to meeting up with my friend

“Oh my god I’m so sorry, but I’m actually supposed to be somewhere right now and I’m totally late” I said scooting back from the chair

“Oh no worries” he said standing up as well

“It was nice talking to you…” I said looking at him

“Matthew, but I go by Matt” he said sticking his hand out

“Well Matt it was nice talking to you, I’m Y/N” I said shaking his hand

“It was great talking to you too” he said smiling at me

“Here let me give you my number. I’d like to talk again” I said nervously

“Yeah sure” he said taking his phone out

After we exchanged numbers I went on with my day

Day 5

Matt and I had met for dinner to catch up. I was enjoying my time with him. He was truly a cool person to hang around, and I slowly felt myself looking for him in my day to day interactions.

“So Matt what brings you to LA” I said looking up at him

“Well I just moved here with my brothers. We’re from Boston and we came here for our jobs” he said

“Ohhh nice what do you do?” I asked taking a sip of my drink

“Well we’re social media influencers” he said laughing a bit

“Oh that’s nice” I said smiling at him

He had shown me their pages and what they do, and I found it fascinating. They were also pretty famous might I add. I felt special hanging out with him, not going to lie.

“Do you have a girlfriend?” I asked him

“No” he replied

“Is it hard because you go between LA and Boston?” I asked

“No I just prefer to be alone” he said chuckling

“Ahhh I see” I said nodding my head

“I just don’t believe in the whole love and soulmate stuff” he replied

“No? How come” I asked him

“I mean what even is love you know? People just throw that word around, and it just ends up hurting people. I like to keep my peace and I like to be single. Less problems” he said

“That’s true” I said nodding my head

“Do you have a boyfriend?” He asked

“Oh no, but I do believe in love and soulmates. I just haven’t found mine” I said laughing

Matt nodded his head and we continued to eat. The rest of the night was amazing, sharing our philosophies on different topics and truly enjoying each others companies

Day 30

Matt and I had been hanging out pretty much everyday, and I truly enjoyed it. Of course I had my own friends, but he was a breath of fresh air.

The only other issue was that I began to have feelings towards him. I tried not to because I know he didn’t believe in love or girlfriends. But he made it hard when he was exactly what I looked for in a man

“You know I enjoy this a lot” he said as we sat on a bench eating ice cream

“Yeah? Me too” I said looking over at him

“It’s nice to just get out with you and have a good time I like it” he said eating his ice cream

“I like it too” I replied

“And I like you too” he said shrugging his shoulders

“I like you too Matt” I replied looking over at him again

That night Matt had walked me home since I wasn’t too far from the ice cream shop.

“Well this is me” I said pointing to the building

“Thank you for coming out tonight” he said

“Thank you for inviting me I had a blast” I said

“Well I’ll let you go now” he said opening his arms for a hug

I hugged Matt and in that moment I felt like my dreams were slowly becoming a reality.

When we pulled away we stopped and stared at one for a moment. Our eyes searched for an answer when suddenly he leaned down and kissed me.

Our lips locked in such a beautiful kiss.

That night when we parted ways my heart thumped with adrenaline. My mind racing with all the possibilities of what we could be.

Day 50

“This view is amazing” Matt said looking at the city line beneath us

“Isn’t it? I come up here when I want to think and clear my mind, but it’s just so beautiful I had to bring you” I said

“There’s not many people here” he replied looking around

“Well yeah, it’s a secret spot” I said smiling at him

“You took me to your secret spot? Am I that special?” He asked

“I guess so” I said biting my bottom lip

He came up behind me wrapping his arms around my waist as he leaned his head on my shoulder. Swaying us side to side slowly.

“When I want to clear my mind I got to this small beach that not many people know about in Boston. It’s actually a place I discovered when my first girlfriend broke up with me. I was so hurt and angry that I just kept driving and landed there” he said looking at the skyline

“I’ve never told anyone that” he whispered

My heart fluttered at this. Being able to break down his walls to get him to tell me more about himself made me warm inside. I think I was changing him….

“I thought you didn’t believe in love?” I said in a whisper

“Well after her I don’t. She completely destroyed me, and I vouched to never give my heart to anyone again” he replied looking at me

“And what about me?” I said laughing

“You’re different” he said tapping my chin with his thumb

Day 63

Matt and I had just had sex for the first time. I mean it was amazing he was so careful with me like I was a dainty feather. He took his time, caressing my every inch, kissing all my insecurities away. He made me feel loved.

My mind moved as we laid in his bed, the sheets keeping us tangled together. The sunlight kissing his skin as he laid on my chest lightly snoring.

His right hand gently placed on my torso as my right hand raked through his hair. Massaging his scalp and occasionally running down his back as the goosebumps rose on his skin.

A smile growing on my face as Matt laid in my arms. My mind playing all our possibilities repeatedly. Matt made me the happiest girl in the world, and I didn’t even know if he realized how special this made me feel

Day 97

My mind began to race as insecurities began to cloud my mind. We’ve been seeing each other for well over two months now, and I wasn’t sure what we were?

I paced around my living room as Matt sat on the couch watching me.

“Y/N what’s wrong?” He asked me, causing me to stop in my tracks

“What….what are we?” I asked looking at him

“What do you mean?” He asked

“I mean us Matt. Were sleeping together, going on dates sending each other gifts, but you haven’t said I was your girlfriend” I replied

“I liked you Y/N a lot, and who cares about labels okay? I want to be with you and that’s all” he said

“I guess…I guess you’re right” I said nodding at him

Day 132

I slammed the door behind me as I stomped into my kitchen throwing my stuff down. I grabbed a bottle of water and began to drink it

“What's the issue now?” Matt asked throwing his hands up in defense

“The issue? Matt some girl was practically throwing herself on you, and you didn’t do a single thing, but when I tell her to back off I’m the problem” I said walking over to him

“Well I can handle my own. I told her I wasn’t interested, and the way you acted was embarrassing” he said

“Matt this happens all the time, and I’m sorry if I embarrassed you, but I’ve had enough of this shit happening” I said shoving past him

“It’s not that serious okay” he said

“You know what? It is serious Matthew. I don’t get this whole casual thing. I want to be your girlfriend. You don’t take me on dates, buy me flowers and have sex with me and say you want this to be casual and just a friends with benefit type of thing. FRIENDS DONT DO THIS” I said raising my voice

“I don’t know what you expect from me. I’ve made this clear from the beginning” he said sighing

“Get out….JUST GET THE FUCK OUT” I yelled opening the front door

Matt left and I slammed the door behind him. Falling down and breaking down on the ground. Why was he being so cruel to me? I didn't get it.

Day 135

I hadn’t spoken to Matt in 3 days, and it was truly bothering me. I prayed he would call or, or show up at my door, but I was disappointed when I got nothing.

I paced my living room anxious and biting my nails contemplating if I should head over to Matt’s house.

After some more bantering with myself I opened my front door to walk out, when I saw Matt getting ready to knock on my door.

“I…what are you doing here?” I asked him

“I came here to say sorry” he said his head hung low

“It’s okay Matt. I just need you to tell me that we aren’t just friends” I said as I moved out the way to let him walk in

He slowly began to walk in without saying a word when I stopped him

“Please” I said in a whisper

“I can’t give you that because it’s not the truth. I’ve made it clear from the beginning I don’t do love. I’m sorry if this isn’t what you want” he said looking at me

Like an idiot I ignored his statement and let him into my house. I swore up and down I could change his mind and make him see that we were meant to be together.

Day 171

Matt and I went bowling which was his favorite thing to do, but the whole time it was like his mind was elsewhere.

“I got a strike babyyyy” I said doing a dance that he loved seeing me do

“Nice” he said offering me a half smile

“What’s wrong?” I asked sitting down next to him

“Nothings wrong” he said looking over at me

“I can tell by your demeanor, are you okay?” I asked again reading his face for an answer

“I’m just tired is all” he said

“We can leave, we can get something to eat or head back to my house” I said smiling at him

“I think…I think I’m going to call it a night” he said standing up

“Oh okay” I said also standing up

We closed our lane and headed outside. He waited for a Uber while my house was two blocks down.

“I’ll uh I’ll see you in a few days” he said nodding at me

“Umm yeah sure” I said bluntly

He kissed me on the cheek as his Uber pulled up. He got in without saying anything else, and didnt even look at me as it drove away.

I walked back home that night confused, hurt and angry. Why was he being this way with me?

Day 174

Matt had asked me to meet him at the cafe we first met around 12. I had gotten there around 12:05, and met him at a table in the back

“Hi” I said sitting down

“Hi” he said staring at me

“Sooo what’s up” I said getting nervous

“I think we should part ways” he said swallowing thickly

“What?” I said as my brows furrowed

“I mean we’re just not meant to be. We fight all the time now and I find no joy in what we do” he said blinking

“I mean couples fight all the time right? This is normal we just have to learn to talk it out” I said reaching out to grab his hand

“The thing is I don’t like who I force myself to be around you. What we had was great, but I’m not ready for a relationship and I can’t give you what you want” he stated

“But…but we can work this out. We can find a middle ground” I said fighting for my life

“No Y/N….we’re over” he stated

I looked at him and blinked. When I saw how serious he was I got up from the table and walked away.

I looked back and prayed he’d be lookin for me, but he wasn’t. He didn’t even care to watch me walk out of his life.

That day ruined me

Day 200

I laid in bed most days tossing and turning as the memories of us played in my mind. Haunted by these memories I often forced myself to sleep, or to cry. My wales so loud I couldn’t even hear my own thoughts

Day 43

“So how’s it going with Matt?” My friend asked

“Oh it’s going amazing! I’m head over heels for this guy, and I think we’re going to end up together” I told her

“Tell me more about him” she said as her eyes lit up

“Oh god I love his hair, the wavy brown locks, and I love his blue eyes I swear I could see a glimpse of us in them, and I love his skin how soft it is and how his cheeks flush when I compliment him, I love his lips they’re so plump and moisturized all the time and I love his smile. His teeth are gorgeous and his smile lights up any room he walks into” I said smiling like an idiot

“Oh god… you really are in love with him” she said laughing

“I guess so” I said laughing with her

Day 205

It was a bit over a month now since I last spoke to Matt. I mean I used to see him everywhere and it’s just like he disappeared off the face of the earth.

My chest physically hurts every single day. I was so stupid to think I could change him. He made it clear from the beginning that he didn’t want a girlfriend.

How stupid and blind could I be to think he’d want me. I mean no one ever wants me in the end.

I killed myself for a guy who didn’t care.

Day 387

Here I was finally stepping out of the house after a week of trapping myself away. There was a crafting fair in my area, and I really needed to get out and walk and smell the fresh air.

I stopped at a few booths and purchased some things. Trying my hardest not to purchase things that reminded me of Matt.

After the last booth I decided to have a seat at a small table as I watched children play in the street. A smile creeped on my face as I watched them.

So pure and innocent, and life has yet to screw them over. On how I’d pay to go back in time and be a kid again. As I continued to watch them my thoughts were interrupted

“Y/N?” I heard to the left of me

My brows furrowed and I turned my head looking over. My breath hitching in my throat.

“Matt?” I said confused

“How have you been?” He asked smiling at me and taking a seat

“Oh I’ve been good” I said offering him a smile

“That’s great. I haven’t seen you in so long. You look good” he said

“Thank you, i know it’s been a long time” I said laughing a bit

“What are you up to these days?” He asked me

“Uhh you know just working, reading and writing” I said

“Did you ever finish that book you started writing? It was…it was really good” he said

“Oh man I forgot about that book….Im not even sure where it is” I said

“You should look for it, and finish it. I’d love to read it” he said smiling at me

“Maybe one day” I said nodding at him

“How have you been?” I asked him

“Me? Oh I’ve been good just working with my brothers still can you believe we’re at 5 million subscribers” he said smiling

“Congrats you guys deserve it” I said

“Thank you….wow this is just amazing seeing you again” he said looking at me with soft eyes

“Yeah it is” I said swallowing thickly

He went to speak when a girl appeared behind him

“Oh there you are Matt” she said walking over to him

“Oh hi” he said standing up

“Uhh Crystal this is Y/N, and Y/N this is Crystal my girlfriend” he said

“Nice to meet you” I said, shaking her hand. My stomach twisting into knots

“It’s so nice to finally meet you. Matt has told me so much about you. He says he’s learned a lot about life from you” she said

“That’s great to hear” I said glancing over at Matt

“Well um I don’t want to keep you, it was great seeing you” Matt said

“Ditto” I said

With that they gave me one last glance and walked away.

My mind wrapped around the word ‘girlfriend’……I wasn’t even sure how to feel truly.

Day 426

I had driven up to the hilltop I always went to when I needed to think. After splitting with Matt I refused to come up here. The memories paining me too much.

I was ready to start fresh, and let go of the past. I wanted to be released of Matt’s shackles, and I needed to start somewhere. So the hilltop was the first thing that came to mind.

I watched the busy street bustle beneath me as I let my mind race freely. Coming to the realization that love and soulmates were all bullshit.

Lies fed to us through books, music and movies. It’s a nice thought, but in the end it doesn’t really work out.

I couldn't be angry at anyone. I mean this is just the fact of life.

I let a smile creep on my face as I sniffled. Finding peace of mind was something I looked forward to and I had to take it day by day.

I let the wind rustle through my hair as I watched the trees sway and the golden sun kiss my skin. Life was beautiful and I was taking it for granted.

“Y/N” I suddenly heard from behind me

I quickly turned around and met eyes with Matt

“Matthew” I said giving him a weak smile

“Strange finding you here” he said walking over to me

“This is my secret place” I said batting my tears away

“I suppose that’s true” he replied laughing and sitting next to me

“Congrats on uhh the girlfriend” I said looking at the skyline

“Don’t say it unless you mean it” he said bumping his shoulder into mine

“Well then in that case my lips are sealed” I said

He let out a breath of air and looked at the skyline

“So uhh are you okay?” He asked after a moment of silence

“I will be” I said kicking the gravel around

“You know it sucks realizing everything you believe in is false” I said wiping my nose

“What do you mean?” He asked looking over at me

“You know soulmates and love and all that shit, you were right” I said looking over at him

“No” he said shaking his head

“Yes don’t look at me like that” I said rolling my eyes

“It was meant to be with Crystal and I. I mean if I never stopped her to tell her she dropped her bag…we wouldn’t be where we are now. And the whole time I would think you were right” he said

“No you didn’t” I said laughing

“Yes! Yes I did” he said laughing too

“It’s just….its just me you weren’t right about, and I’m sorry I couldn’t be the one for you” he said looking at me as he blinked a few tears away

I looked at him and let a few tears fall. Someone I thought was truly mine…but he was not mine. I was the person who paved the way for him to find who he truly needed in life

“You never wanted to be my boyfriend, but here you are” I said nodding my head

“I know, but it just happened” he said

“I don’t understand…I don’t understand how it just happened” I said shaking my head

“I just woke up one day and I knew….I knew that she was who I could spend the rest of my life with” he replied wiping his eye

“Knew what?” I said as my voice got shaky

“Knew what I was never sure of with you” he said looking at me

Those words pained me….they did, but I couldn’t be mad at him. I can not hate someone who doesn’t want me, it's not their fault.

Day 78

“Matt how do you know believe in love I don’t get it” I said laughing as I played with his hair

“It’s simple, I just don’t. What does it even mean? I say this all the time” he said laughing

“How do you know you’re not in love is the real question” I replied back

“Well how would I know?” He said running his hands up my thigh as he laid on my stomach

“I don’t know…..you just wake up one day and you just know” I replied back

To this he stood quiet, and it made me wonder if he was falling in love with me

Day 426

“Yeah” I said ina whisper

Matt pulled me in for a hug and rubbed my back. A hug I so badly needed and I gripped onto him letting a few more tears slip from my eyes. I thought what we had was real, and it wasn’t. And this would be the last time I would really feel Matt

He pulled away and looked into my eyes smiling at me

“I should go, but I’m really happy to see that you’re doing good�� he said standing up and walking away

“Matt” I called out and he turned around

“I really do hope that you’re happy” I said standing up

He looked at me for a few seconds licking his lips and flashing a toothy smile at me. Nodding his head and whispering a thank you.

He turned back around and walked away.

I sat back down on the bench running my hands through my hair as I let the tears fall.

This…this is where I would be leaving any memory and may hope of Matt. He would stay here on this hilltop overlooking LA.

Day 574

Dear Diary,

It’s been 400 days since I parted ways with Matt. It’s been over a year and I can finally say that I am happy and okay. The very last conversation with Matt was hard, but it was needed.

I needed him to let me go, so that I could let him go. He helped me understand it all, and for that I’m thankful. He cleared a path for me that would make it easier for me to go on with life.

Although I spent many nights praying that he and I were meant for each other deep down I’m glad that we weren’t. I’m glad he was in my life when he was because who knows who I would be right now. I’m forever grateful he was put into my life to show me the beauty and the pain of it all.

I still have love for Matt, but in a different way than most would think. He helped me find peace of mind, and although it was painful and agonizing torture I’m glad I went through it.

He showed me that there’s much more in life and even though he was not mine I could push forward with myself. He opened my eyes to a lot of things, and I’m grateful for it. He’s doing well with his girlfriend, and I couldn’t be more happy for him. I sometimes find myself wondering what that would be like if it was him and I, but I try not to think about it.

He’s helped me be a better me. I finished my book finally and had it published. It’s actually doing really well, and even showed his support. Saying even though he doesn’t read he finds himself going back to my pages and re reading them. He really is the best thing that has happened to me.

Even though he didn’t make it to the end of my story I’m still grateful he was a part of the chapters. And I will always be grateful to be a part of his story, watching from the sidelines as one of his cheerleaders.

He deserves it all!

So with that diary I am finally closing this chapter of my life, and beginning a new one. Manifesting the life that I have always wanted for myself and happy where I’m heading.

This is the last page of this diary, and it’s such a bittersweet ending to end this right here and wonder if it’ll continue on a new page in a fresh book…..I guess time will tell, and with that I’m off to new ventures!

Sincerely,

Y/N

I shut my book and closed my pen. Rolling my shoulders as I looked out the cafe window. Smiling at the young children playing in the streets….the beauty of life!

I finished my coffee and threw it in the trash. Stretching and cracking my neck as I gathered my journal and pen. I began to walk away

“Excuse me miss” I heard from behind me

“Uh yes” I said turning around

“You left your bag” he said walking over to me with it

“Oh shoot! My minds all over the place” I said shaking my head and grabbing my bag from him

“Oh man I get that!” He said laughing

“Well thank you….” I said waiting for his name

“Oh Samuel! But I go by Sam” he said sticking his hand out for me to shake

A chill ran up my spine….i've come full circle again

“Well thank you Sam, I’m Y/N” I said shaking his hand

“You’re welcome Y/N” he said smiling at me

“I’ll see you around” I said nodding at him

“Yeah I’ll see you around” he said moving his glasses up with his right hand

My eyes immediately darted to the book in his hand….

The same Stephen King book I picked up when I met Matt.

What a small world….

The End

Alright this one was LONGGGGG, but I loved writing it🥺, and I hope you guys enjoyed it. This will not be a series just a quick little imagine where the ending is up to the reader🤭. I love yall and I hope you enjoyed reading it🥹🖤🖤 Also this is based on 500 Days of Summer because that movie broke meeee😭

-J💅🏽

[ayayiiie]

Make me love you

Song playing: Taeyeon - Make me love you.

Pairing: fuck boy! Heeseung x good girl! Reader. (Feat Enha)

TW: cursing, mentions of sex, drugs, smoking, throwing up. (Y'all is Heeseung very a bad boy in this one? :3)

Genre: hints of angst, fluff

Words: ~ 13k

Trope:

Lee Heeseung wants you real bad. So what? He needs to prove how much he's worthy.

- « Don't you want to claim me as yours baby girl? »

- « You will only bring me problems Lee. »

- « You don't know til you try. Look at me, ready to give my entire self to you. »

« Then.. Take me far away. »

하나.

« Shadows come from the light in the darkness 

In times that are even lonelier »

He was foully beautiful, has a disgustingly pretty smile and a diabolically angel face. He was as hot as Sukuna Ryomen, smart like Chrollo Lucifer, toned like Eren Yeager and flirty (and annoying) as Usui Takumi.

Every one of his steps scream power and dominance, people in town were obliged to recognize his god-like features.

Lee Heeseung was a piece of wonder. He was the personification of the Great Chinese Wall. Well, for others it means he was one of the seven wonders, his friends being the others six. For you he was illigible, like a void devoid of colors, feelings, words. Looking at him was like walking on the Great Chinese Wall. Infinite stairs, a never ending pathway, long exhausting adventure where you can get lost easily.

You never knew how to understand Lee Heeseung.

And people were here, yelling at you for not being liquified by his unbelievable visuals.

You were not attracted to Lee Heeseung.

And people were here once again, crying about you not having a good eyesight because who in the world would tell a big NO NO to THE Lee Heeseung ?

Despite his apparence, one thing you knew for sure was that he was the synonym of troubles. And that compensated his visuals. Lee Heeseung was a big red flag.

Vandalizing walls, driving fast past three in the morning, drinking heavily almost every night, skipping class (even though he always passed his exams with flying colors which confused you), smoking, sniffing drugs you never heard the name before, fucking some random women of every age everywhere.

Yeah, for you he was the worst of the worst, and you sure would not (in this peaceful life of yours) like to have an affair or everything as minuscule as it is with him.

You knew that Lee Heeseung had no interests in you either and it was perfectly perfect for you.

둘.

« The hand that was carefully held out

I couldn’t hold it, I’ve only hesitated but »

« Hey, did you heard that? Lee Heeseung has won the cars’ racing yesterday!

- Listen Young-Hee, you do know I don't give a freak about him right? This man screams problems.

- But don't deny he's attractive! Plus Seo-Hyun had a one night stand with him last week, are you realizing? THE Park Seo-Hyun?

- Please why do you look so interested about that? What is incredible about this?

- Oh please Y/N, we ALL know that Seo-Hyun has a purity ring given by her dad! She promised chastety and here she was, fucking with Lee Heeseung!

- And so? It's something between her, her father and Heeseung, what do I have to do about that?

- YOU COULD BE NEXT IN LINE! »

The strawberry milk you were drinking went out of your mouth to someone's shirt. Eyes widening in both shock and embarrassment, you quickly excuse yourself, not even looking up to cross eyes with them and lend them a tissue while repeatedly apologizing.

« I'm sorry I'm sorry, I didn't attend to do that! »

The bell ringing was a lucky sign for you to sprint directly to your class. As you both pant from the little course, you suddenly hear a loud chuckle from Young-Hee.

« Girl that's what I call being "purged"! she said in between laughs.

- Shut up that was embarassing! And it's your fault! You did it on purpose right?!

- I will keep doing it to see those faces you make! She laughs loudly, people staring.

- Hee! » you yell, trying to grab her arm. But she was faster and quickly went to her seat.

Let's say you couldn't focus on the entire class. Your mind was busy spacing out and thinking about the conversation earlier. Of course you knew that Park Seo-Hyun was the famous virgin of the campus, because everyone knew that. And the fact she wore proudly her ring was her way of showing her engagement !

« You could be next in line! »

This sentence keeps repeating in your head like a malicious mentra and you can't help but to imagine Lee Heeseung devouring you with his eyes. As much as you hated to admit it, he was indeed handsome. But that was a facade to you. Because deep inside, you kept telling yourself that he was someone bad, manipulative and who had no interest in women's feelings. That's what you hate the most. Your dad always made sure to show his love to your mom, so it sure was a big shock when you learn that some men were beating and mistreating their girlfriends or wives. The perfect image of love just crumbled down and you couldn't help but to be on your guard ever since. Especially with people like Lee Heeseung. People categorized you as the « girl talking to only girls » because you always talk with girls only. Not that you despise men, you just don't feel like talking to them and you were perfectly fine with it. Even if some dare to approach you, you woulk kindly answer them and then dash as fast as possible, avoiding the interaction like plague.

Indeed, you did not hate men, you just never knew how to talk to them.

Beside your big brother of two years older your dad and to any men in your small family, talking to the opposite genre was a real challenge for you. Sweaty hands, swifty gazes, mumbling and rosy cheeks. You hated making a fool of yourself and indirectly, men were making you this way. You discovered later that you had heterosocial anxiety. « Good » you told yourself ironically while rolling your eyes, this means talking to men was making you nervous.

But like all stories, there was an exception, a boy in who you could talk to without stuttering and being insecure about your side profile, about the way you would smile, all the mimicks you had. He was your childhood neighbour, Kim Sunoo.

Maybe because he looked less scary and more welcoming, or the way he would smile and his eyes would form two little crescents. Maybe because he seemed more boyish ? Kim Sunoo was the only boy you could talk without being feared of being judged. For you, he will always be the little boy who shared strawberries his grandma prepared for after-school snack. He will always be your super adventures’ companion in your garden.

So it sure was painful when Kim Sunoo transferred from public school to private. Being children, you did not keep in touch and never saw each other ever since. But Sunoo gifted you with a braided bracelet. It was synonym of you guys’ friendship as he too, had one. His mother would show you pics of him, he would send her some after he finished his class, in secondary school. His peace sign beside his wink and little smile would bring a grin to your face too, somewhat relieved he was doing so well.

As you were thinking deeply of your childhood friend, a hand came crashing on your face.

« Young-Hee! I swear you're a dead woman!

- Listen, it's lunch and I'm hungry, stop thinking about Lee Heeseung and let's go to the cafet! she crosses her arms with a devilish smirk plastered on her face.

- I wasn't even thinking about him, cut the drama. »

The walk to the cafeteria was filled with laughters and a warm mood. Tray in hands, you were searching for a place to sit. It seems like today was filled with students as the only places you found were in the middle of two groups, hastily chatting. Not even two minutes after Young-Hee and you started eating, a breaking sound was heard on the other side of the cafet.

« LEE HEESEUNG YOU FUCKING SON OF A BITCH ! » was heard by a female voice.

There, was standing Park Seo-Hyun, infront of a sitting Lee Heeseung. It looked like she threw her glass at him within her tray of food. You see how unbothered he looked, even with food and water all over his clothes. Seo-Hyun scoffed at his lack of reaction and quickly walk out of the cafet, her two best friends following her. Shrugging, you turn back and start eating like nothing happened.

« Oh my god, what do you think did just happen?

- Well, this is what happens when you go inside Lee Heeseung’s circle. That’s why I don’t want anything with him, you said, unimpressed while digging in your tomatoes (I’m sorry for those who don’t like them 😭)

- But don’t you want to know? I loooove gossips hehe…

- If you want to investigate it’s without me you already know that, you say, unbothered.

- But please, she said, a tiny pout on her lips and giving her best doe eyes.

- I really hate you, you know? You sighed while shaking your head.

- Yey! I love you bestie! » She smiles happily then proceeds to swallow everything she had in her mouth.

For you, it was none other than some childish things, without harm. At least, that’s what you expected.

셋.

« My heart already trembles, I keep

getting scared

On this night when you secretly held out

your hand »

After disposing your tray in the conveyor belt, Young-Hee excitedly locked your cubital fossa together and has speed towards the almost empty hallways.

« Where are we going? You tell just loud enough for her to listen.

- In front of their class, Heeseung and Seo-Hyun are classmates, didn’t you know? She said making sure to be discreet and to look everywhere.

- I’m not such a big gossip girl like you Hee, you know that, you watched her getting agitated.

- It’s not some gossip, it’s general knowledge Y/N!

- As if, you couldn’t help but to roll your eyes.

- Let’s hide here! » Young-Hee said as she sweeps you both behind a big pillar glued to the classroom’s wall.

Peeking through the marble, you quietly observe your surroundings. Seo-Hyun was in the classroom with her friends, talking angrily about something you couldn’t hear.

« This situation kinda stress me Hee, you said playing with your bracelet. The tropes were so lose they could ripped anytime. It was a habit of you to fidget with it when you were nervous.

- Shh, I’m trying to decipher what they’re saying », she shushed you, looking attentively at the girls.

You couldn’t help but to roll your eyes a second time. Young-Hee was really persistent when she wanted to be but you couldn’t blame her, she lifted up your moral numerous times with this personality of hers.

« I fucking hate his guts! He promised me so many things but at the end what?! I gave my fucking virginity to an asshole like him?! Screams Seo-Hyun.

- He doesn’t deserve you Seo, trust us, said one of her friends.

- But Chae I gave him my v card, my dad’s gonna kill me if he learn that.

- You can just wear the ring again, he wouldn’t know.

- The whole school knows it! No way he will not be aware!

- Seo, calm down first. Instructed Chae-Won.

- I can’t-

- Y/N! Hide quick! » whispered-yelled Young-Hee.

Panicked, you rapidly hide behind the pillar, pressing your body as far as you could.

« What’s happening? » You whisper to your friend, completely lost.

Hee only gave you her big eyes as a response and gestured you that someone was coming. You didn’t think two times about it and just nodded.

« What are you gonna do Hee? She’s super mad at you and look at you, you’re covered in tomatoes’ sauce. You both hear a man voice talking.

- Huh? She took my hoodie when we did it last week, I just want to take it back, and I need to change clothes too. You could recognize Heeseung’s voice at the same time steps were coming your way.

- You’re unbelievable man! Exclaimed the other guy with him, chuckling in disbelief.

- I know, Heeseung only replied. You could practically hear and imagine his smirk as they open the door.

- What do you want bastard?! Screams Seo-Hyun.

- Wow, I didn’t came to be assaulted. I just want to take my hoodie back, I left it at yours last week.

- Already threw it in the trash can. She spat bitterly.

- Ouch, » murmured Young-Hee.

You looked at Young-Hee but didn’t expect her to make a silly face so you accidentally snort without realizing you both could be in big troubles if they happen to know you were here.

« Hey, did you heard that? Said the friend accompanying Heeseung.

- Hear what Jake? Questioned Heeseung.

- I heard some muffles over there, let me check. »

Panic immediately took possession of your body as you hurriedly run and turn in the near corridor.

« Hey! Wait! » You hear from the other side as you run endlessly trying to turn in the maximum corridors possible to left him.

Finally arriving at the back of your school, you both pant loudly, trying to catch your breath.

« That was freaking close! For once Mr Hwang’s running class weren’t useless! Pant Young-Hee between each inspirations taking.

- Listen carefully Hee, you stand fully up as your hands were resting on your knees to catch your breath, last time. I swear, last time forever.

- But they didn’t catch us, I’m sure he didn’t even see our faces! » She exclaimed feigning innocence.

You frown. If Jake was running behind you, he must have seen two figures at least. Plus, girls. You subconsciously touch your wrist to feel your bracelet when nothing brush your fingertips. Imagining the worst, you look down only to see it gone.

« Shit shit shit, don't tell me it fell off while we were running? You mumbled.

- What happened? asks Young-Hee, concerned.

- My bracelet fell off when we ran Hee, I need to search for it, it's a gift!

- Wow, it's okay, let's go back and see if it's there. »

You then walk the opposite way, following exactly each corridor you took. You were stressing, losing the only memory of your friend was the last thing you wanted to face right now. And as you kept approaching the classroom, your fear only increased.

« It's nowhere to be found Y/N... said your companion, empathic.

- Maybe it just fell right next to the pillar? I will take a look, you finally sighed, feeling hopeless.

- Okay, I'll search in this area over there, » she pointed the opposite direction with her finger.

As you were searching, you failed to notice a stare on you, silently watching every move you made.

You finally concluded after fifteen minutes that it was lost and you couldn't do anything about it. To feel guilty and sad were an understatement to what you were feeling right now. This bracelet was your anti-stress and now it was gone.

넷.

« Make me kiss you

 Ma-make me kiss you »

The end of the day came up rather quickly and you were now packing your things in your backpack. Young-Hee bided you goodbye earlier because she has tennis sessions so today you had to walk back home alone. It was actually great for you as you long for loneliness and peace sometimes. It eases your mind, not that being with Young-Hee create headaches but she was a little bit too loud sometimes.

As you exit the hallway of your university, someone secretly hold their phone up and snap a picture of you walking away. Shuffling it back in their pocket, they act like nothing happened and watch your back disappears.

« So you’re like that huh?! Taking pic of someone without their consent?! » Screams a girl.

You abruptly turn around to see the scrap. There you see again Seo-Hyun and Heeseung. Looks like she was yelling at him for something he did.

« Does it concern you? Just because we fucked doesn’t mean we’re dating idiot, » he spoke calmly, his chin lightly raised alongside a brow.

Reminding you of your « mission » with Young-Hee, you can’t help but to approach the scene quietly, making sure you’re discreet. As you hide behind a spot you continue to listen.

« Then you shouldn’t have promised me so many things that night! Was it nothing to you?! She angrily tells.

- And what are these things? Because I don’t remember any actually, he answers casually. He was used to it.

- You told me you will make me feel special, that I’m not like the others and that I’ll be the only one! At this point she was just stomping her foot on the ground brutally.

- Oh. Yeah it was in the heat of the moment. Never actually think this way. Plus I was drunk so I didn’t really paid attention to what I was saying, » he said once again as if it really didn’t bother him to see her on the verge of beating him up.

*clap*

Your eyes widened at the loud clap your heard and you were sure it came from her hand entering in collision with his cheek. « Must have hurt » you told yourself in your head.

« Fucking asshole, I’m gonna denounce you for what you’ve done and also for taking a pic of Y/N in secret! » she lastly said before storming away.

You slowly realized what she said and confusion took all over your mind.

« Wait, what? He took a secret pic of me? » You wondered in your mind.

- Stop hiding. I know you’re here, you hear a masculine voice calling, broking your self-thought bubble.

- Oh shit, you mumbled, it was over now, you were discovered, umh, hi haha, I was just about to go haha, you said, the uneasy feeling slowly climbing in your whole body as you step out of your hiding spot, walking awkwardly like a robot with a grimace.

- Really? You do know it’s not really polite to listen to others in secret yeah? »

Lee Heeseung grabs onto your shoulder, the scene particularly comic as he turns your around.

As you face him, your eyes immediately locked together and you can’t help but to feel intimidated by his gaze. It was teasing, almost mocking and shockingly traversing your entire core. You feel naked under him and once again you remind yourself why you hated talking to men this much. Instead of his uniform’s shirt he was wearing a plain oversized t-shirt of color white, he probably changed clothes after receiving the food on himself at the cafet. His black hair were swaying by the wind, softly falling on his mischievous eyes. God he was perfect.

« So? Kitten got your tongue angel? He tilted his head, waiting for an answer.

- Don’t… call me that, it sounds naughty coming from your mouth, you said looking finally down, not supporting his gaze.

- Oh really? That’s what y’all say, he chuckled slowly moving forward, but y’all love it in bed.

- And you talk about me listening to conversations in secret but you are not so good yourself, taking pic like a creep of someone without their consent, » you spat, your tone harsher than you intended too and your eyes piercing his when you lift your head. As much as you wanted to deny it, your cheeks were already red and your heartbeat as quick as the speed of light.

In response, he smirks, clearly pleased by what he’s seeing and hearing in front of him. You tried not to take in details his black hair perfectly styled as well as his perfect face and soft creamy skin. You then notice how bad Seo-Hyun had slapped him as a red mark was clearly visible on his left cheek.

« I don’t really like brats but with you I think I can make some efforts, he shrugged and came even more close, I don’t want to be harsh with you baby it would break my heart, he whispered, his hand coming up to brush against your chin.

- Who said you could touch me? Delete this pic as soon as possible and leave me alone, you’re carrying troubles, you sweep his hand away and step back.

- And what if I don’t? What are you gonna do? His cocky grin never leaving his face.

- I… I will report it to the police! You stumble over your words, quickly regretting the way you look so weak in front of him.

- Will you? When you know that my dad is a powerful CEO? In fact, the most powerful of the country? » He retorts, a feeling of satisfaction filling him up when your eyes widen up.

You sigh then frown at him and quickly dash away, not wanting to talk further. It was infuriating you that he was always winning. You hated him so much.

« We can find a way if you’re willing to be mine! 

- Never!! » you shout loud enough for him to hear you, only to hear a laugh as a response.

- How would you react if I tell you that you’re the reason I bring troubles Y/N? » Heeseung finally sighed watching your silhouette ventures between the buildings.

You let out a scream after making sure nobody was around you.

« This freaking Lee Heeseung!! You and your bad mouth will go down in hell I swear! You angrily said as you stomp your feet.

- Pff. »

You turn around as soon as you heard something. Scanning your surroundings you search the source of the noise.

« Is someone there? You ask, unsure and on your defensive.

- Not at all, act like I’m not here, answered a voice.

- Are they dumb or dumb? I just yelled my frustration and you’re telling me to continue embarrassing myself? You thought, low key judging them. Where are you? Show yourself. » (Frozen enwnkzjwnz)

After a few minutes, a boy finally step out and came infront of you. He was wearing a white t-shirt and by the look of the small pink stain on it you immediately remembered what happened this morning.

« Oh, you said taken aback.

- Like you said « Oh », he laughed, thank you for customizing my t-shirt, I didn’t know it was a tradition in your uni, he looked down at it, a small smile on his face.

- Huh… sorry… you didn’t had any clothes to change? You nervously ask.

- Oh no, I’m new here and I needed to get my dorm’s keys after school so nope.

- I’m sorry you had to walk like this the entire day. Uhm… » you said, hesitant.

In fact you were hesitating, one part of you wanted to go home, feeling the urge to burry yourself alive because a male was talking to you but yet another part was feeling too guilty to just go and you feel like you had to forgive for what you’ve done.

« Yes? He looked at you, a soft smile appearing on his face.

- Do you want to go to the cafe shop with me? We can go and drink some chocolate milk? I want to apologize properly.

- Uh, it will be coffee milk for me, he laughed, but yeah sure, » he smiles.

You couldn’t help the dumbfounded expression on your face as you heard his answer. « Mr is picky I see. » you thought to yourself. Well, you thought you said it in your head but his laugh caught you off guard, WAIT DID YOU JUST ASKED A BOY OUT ?

« I heard you, and I personally do not think that I’m picky, I just have my preferences, » he says proudly, mischievous eyes looking straight right through yours.

You just shake your head, already embarrassed about the fact he heard your thoughts.

As you both make your way to the cafe shop, you learn that his name is Sunghoon Park. He was currently an ice skater and was preparing for his national competition. As a big fan of Yuzuru Hanyu, you couldn’t help but to feel interested in his career’s story.

« So you learned ice skating when you were 10? That’s quite amazing. Do you have any friends? You ask without really knowing how you could talk to him this easily.

- Mh.. only one, her name is Eunseo, she is the only girl who dared to come to me when we were young, he shrugged looking unbothered.

- Oh, were you the only boy? You keep asking, trying to match his walking pace, your voice weakening as you saw the unbothered look on his face, were you boring? Did you forced him to go with you? And what if he didn’t wanted to?

- In my club yes, it was kinda lonely back then before I met Junhwan, he notices that you were having a hard time keeping up with him so he slowed down, quickly scanning your smaller figure with a glance.

- I see I see, you nod rapidly, your eyes that were on him now looking in front of you, throat suddenly dry as the conversation touched its end.

- And you? What’re you doing on a daily basis? He raised an eyebrow towards you.

- Me? Haha nothing as interesting as you, I’m a simple girl, you try to brush the subject away, surprised that he kept the conversation on going.

- Really? Aren’t you working at an animals center? He opens the door for you as you were now arrived.

- How… how do you know that? You enter, waving a hand to thank him.

- A friend of a friend, » he grins once more, passing before you towards the counter.

« What in the world..? » you thought again, gradually joining him as your mind overflowed with thoughts, finding him kinda creepy.

While you guys took commands, you quickly paid for both drinks before he could do anything, muttering a shy « it’s on me ». Unfortunately for you, you missed the way his eyes shone as his heart skipped a beat. You then found a table in a corner, near a window offering you the view of a busy crowd. The more you were thinking of the situation you were right now, the more you’re nervous. Endless fears and thoughts invading your head as you look around in an alarmed state, your knees automatically shaking under the table.

« You seem to have a lot of thoughts in your head. Every time you’re quiet, I’m quite sure you’re thinking of something, he softly puts his chin on his palm as his elbow is resting on the table, his attention entirely on you, making things even harder for you to support the awkward atmosphere you were feeling alone.

- Yes, I actually think a lot haha, not you? Your gaze darting away from his stare.

- Depends, he responds, eyes not blinking and continuing to stare right into your orbits.

- Number 38! You perked, reacting to your command’s number.

- Will be right back, » you stand up and walk rather awkwardly feeling his intense gaze on your back.

You went to grab your drink and thanked the woman. On your way back, you notice a frown adorning Sunghoon's soft features as he was staring at his phone. Not wanting to bother him, you sat down quietly, sipping on the sweetness awaited, immediately calming your stress. He quickly put his phone back into his pocket before looking at you, eyes softening upon seeing your content eyes. You were zoning out, so did not notice his eyes staring at you.

« It's unfair really, he managed to mumbled, a grin evident on his face as he finally looks away.

- What is unfair? You barely heard what he said but did anyways.

- It's unfair to look this cute actually, he whispers, still looking around the cafe shop.

- W-what did you say? I didn’t hear you, you purse your lips, blinking in confusion. To be honest you did heard him, you just wanted to be sure and not be delusional.

- Nothing, a simple note to myself, » he shrugs and then stand up when his order is being called.

You couldn't help but wonder to what he said earlier, what does he mean by "unfair"? Anyways, you checked the time on your phone to see that it was late (or that you wanted to escape from this situation?), and that you needed to revise for a test coming soon. Sunghoon was just arriving when you stand up. He gave you a confused look and you quickly told him the reason of your departure.

« Already leaving? We have just arrived? He asks, incredulous, standing still with his drink in hand. (Sunghoon be like : 🧍‍♂️)

- I know and I'm sorry for that! I'll see you around! You say, in a sort of a rush.

- Wait lemme at least walk you, he tries to slow you down, but you were faster and have already left the cafe shop. Aish... This girl... » he tilted his head, disappointed in himself or in you he didn't know, but he for sure wanted to spend a little bit more time with you.

After all, you caught his eyes and with it, his cold heart.

다섯.

« Make me touch you 

Ma-make me touch you »

The following week was packed.

You finally let out a sigh of relief, it was now the week-end, you will have the deserved time to breathe. You were now in your room, on your bed, laying on your chest. You had just finished your night routine and was on the verge of sleeping when you heard something hitting your window. Panicked, you quickly turn off your bedside lamp, telling who-the-hell they're that you're sleeping and above all, that you want to be alone. In fact, you were scared it was a stealer or a serial killer and hurriedly hide yourself under your blanket as if it will protect you from them. Even though you tried to sleep, your eyes tightly shut, the noise wouldn’t stop, it was quite the contrary. Taking your courage in both hands, you quietly stand up and gently push aside your curtains before looking for the culprit of your peacefulness. Being shocked was an understatement as you saw none other than Lee Heeseung standing behind your gates, getting ready to throw yet another rock on your window before you furiously open the latter.

« Lee Heeseung! What are you doing at this hour? I'm trying to sleep! You whisper-yelled, not wanting to wake up your parents.

- Come with me! He offers you a big smile, waving at you.

- Is he crazy or what? You murmured to yourself, not believing his words. What? Why? Are you going to give me some candies and then kidnap me? You say ironically, I don't know you! Go to your home! » You finally pronounce your last words before closing your window.

« I wouldn’t mind kidnapping you though, » he mumbles under his breath as he smiles, heart racing.

Not even two seconds after it was closed, you hear knocking sounds again. Taking a deep breath, you tried to calm yourself, you were not one to be very patient, plus the lack of sleep these days were really working you up. Lee Heeseung or not, you were strangers and he was invading your privacy at this point ! It has to cease before your parents found him out and call the police. As much as you didn’t liked him, it's not like you hated him too and you just wanted to avoid problems. God knows what could happen to you if this story disclose around, his fangirls would grab your hair, make a pretty haircut (note the sarcasm) and throw you in the nearest dump while his father would probably kick you out of the country with your parents. So you decided to slip on an oversized hoodie, stolen from your brother (working overseas), and to step down your stairs in the quietest way possible. You needed to be extra careful because your mother was a light sleeper so even the weenie mistake would wake her up and you would then be in big problems. Reaching the entrance, you open the door without a care about your looks, after all, it completely went out of your head.

« What's your problem? Why are you here? You hiss, now infront of the fuckboy of the campus.

- Woah ~ so sexy, he whistles at the sight of your disheveled hair, oversized hoodie, slippers and your annoying face.

- Just answer the damn question Lee, you switch your weight on one of your leg, the foot opposed stomping against the fresh grass of your garden. Your hands were on your hips as you were glaring at him.

- Just wanted to see you, that's all, he lifted his hands above his shoulders, acting as if he was surrending himself.

- And why so? I don't understand, we are not friends, not even acquaintances even more, we don't speak to each other at all. How did you even got my address?! And most importantly : What do you want from me? Your frown deepening, your arms cross on your chest.

- I'm racing tonight, I need to bring someone with me. I thought of-, he began but you quickly dismiss him.

- Rejected. Did you really think I was going to accept? In your dreams, you scoff, not believing him.

- Come on, it will be fun I promise you, » he extends his hand, as if waiting for you to grab it.

The truth is, you heard from some classmates that racing with Heeseung was amazing. He would have excellent driving skills and it would have been a shame to miss it. Closing the distance between you and him, you raise your hand, almost as if you were going to accept his proposition, only to clap his hand down. His eyes, that were hopeful of you possibly agreeing, lose their light, like a sad puppy not getting his treat.

« I will say it one last time Heeseung, you look straight into his eyes, rejected. » You gritted, emphasizing on your last word.

You then turn around, not letting him the time to reply back, and enter your home. Not even two minutes inside and you're glidding down the door, your hands pressed against your chest, a futile attempt to calm your messy heartbeat. This interaction with this man was in no point good for you and put you in one hell of a state you couldn't even imagine.

Why everything was suddenly happening to you? And most of all, why did it has to be LEE FREAKING HEESEUNG?

That night, you couldn't sleep.

여섯.

« Make me want you 

Ma-make me want you »

The next morning you felt especially groggy. You didn't had much sleep and it was also the first day of your period. « I hate this world » you mumbled to yourself, already feeling the cramps coming. As you peacefully went out of bed to ready yourself, a notification caught your attention.

« #Lee_Heeseungs_new_chick »

Seriously? Was he going to follow you everywhere you were going? Would you believe! Now he’s even invading your notifications… You feel like Lee Heeseung was stuck with you for whatever reason and it pissed you off. For wanting him away it looks like the opposite.

« Are you ready Y/N? Hurry or you will be late, informs your father, peeking through your door, ajar.

- Yes I'm coming right now, is mom already gone? You ask, standing up and taking your uniform hanging on your wardrobe.

- Yup, said she has to go early today, » you hear his faint voice as he was walking down the stairs, his voice resonating in the corridor.

It was unusual for you, your mom never had to go early to work. But you shrugged it off, everything happens for a reason. You quickly do your morning routine then finally went out of your house.

As you arrived at the university, you couldn't help but notice how stares were directed at you for a reason you ignore. Being self-counscious, you found a restroom and checked if you had anything on your face or your clothes, only to notice that everything was perfectly fine. What the hell was happening?

The only way to know was to ask Young-Hee as she always keep herself updated. And you didn't had to search for her for too long as you could pratically hear her yells from the other side of the hallway.

« Y/NNN! Oh my god why didn't you tell me? She grabs your hand and pulls you towards a quieter side of the hallway, where nobody could hear you both.

- About what? You ask, like a lost puppy.

- You and Lee Heeseung are dating !Congrats! She cheerfully says.

- Wait- what?! No way in this freaking world! I do not like him and you know it! You offer her your most disgusted-shocked face, making her laugh.

- But the whole campus is aware! She then take out her phone from her bag's pocket.

- And why am I not aware then? What's happening?

You noticed that everyone were looking at you with weird eyes, you panicked a little, looking repeatedly on both side of you.

- Look! » She shows you her screen.

You couldn't believe what you were seeing right now.

It was a picture of you and Heeseung last night. The picture showed the moment you just taped his hand down to refuse his proposition, but it gives the impression of you two holding hands. Who would take a picture of you and him this late at night? One of his fans? Or maybe he planned this all along? You were confused and soon a striking pain started to pounced in your head. Good, you were having a headache because of all the ruckus. Not to mention the pain of your cramps too, you knew how bad they were particularly during the first few days.

« Are you okay? Worriedly ask Young-Hee, seeing you squinting your eyes in pain.

- Having a headache and period cramps are the worst I swear, you mutter under your breath, taking a big inspiration only to wince when you feel the contractions.

- Today's really not your day ma girl, she shakes her head, going through her bag to find a potential pill that could helps you.

- Let's go in class, it's about to start, » you take her extended hand that was giving you the med and walk to class, steps galloping in fear of being late.

Mrs So was already in the classroom, spreading her books and belongings and not even after being seated, she began her lesson. You quickly ate the med while rummaging through your bag to pull out your belongings.

« Pssst Y/N, »

It was one of your classmate, in whom you never really spoke. The way her eyes glinted in curiosity was slowly freaking you out. You knew what she wanted to know.

« No, we aren't dating, don't misunderstand the pic, you respond drier than attended and not even sparring her a glance making it look even more rude.

- Okay okay sorry for wasting your time, you could hear the sarcastic tone with an eye roll, not that you really care. What a boring girl you are, why would he choose you instead of me? »

You silently sighed, it's not your fault if his flirty ass was in front of your house at 1 A.M. But maybe you shouldn't have approached him and just should've shut him down and go to sleep like nothing happened.

« Ladies at the right, stop talking, warns Mrs So.

- It's Y/N, she can't keep her mouth shut, she said, voice filled with sarcasm.

- Huh? Are you talking about you?

- Tch, what are you five?

- Yup five times smarter than you, you proudly smile, the whole class hyping you.

- YOU-

- Mrs Park, this is your last warning, stares Mrs So.

- I'll kill you Marilyn Monhoe, she lastly whisper.

- At least I'm hot, » you quietly say, hearing the snickers of some of your classmates.

Internally, you were screaming because how in hell someone spotted you with THE Lee Heeseung? This just made you exasperated and more determined to have less contact with him...

Days had passed and you were avoiding Lee Heeseung like plague. The latter did not understand your behavior as he was secretly longing for you.

Following you with his eyes each time you happened to walk by him. His friends, except one were looking at him with a grin, they knew oh how much Heeseung wanted to own you, well the reason was unknown to them, but the way he was devouring you with his eyes spoke enough for them to know you were his prey.

In fact, Lee Heeseung has been infatuated by you the day he saw you rejecting one guy. The latter was known for being a real playboy in disguise, playing the Prince Charming to get girls. We could say he and Heeseung were sworn enemies, competing over who could catch more girls. So when you turned the guy down, it only created a spark in Heeseung, the desire to win you invading his brain. If he could have you, he could brag about it to the loser who failed, gaining yet a tingle of pride. At first, winning you and throwing you like an old rag was all he could think of, yet what he didn't expected, was the fact you were *actually* attractive and interesting. He felt like you were an unpolished gem, a precious diamond that didn't showcase its spark yet. In his head he was the miner, you were the diamond, he had to polish you, to make you shine.

일곱.

« K-kiss you, t-touch you, w-want you »

« Make me love you »

Soon enough, seeing and thinking that Lee Heeseung's attention on you was finally finished, you lowered your guards and peacefully lived your life, knowing the only person you needed in your social circle was Young-Hee.

*Ding*

The sound of your phone makes you freak out as you take it out of your bag. Speaking of the devil, Hee has just send you a message, claiming she was feeling sick and won't be able to come in class.

« Is this for real? The exact moment I think about her, she's sick, this girl I swear, » you sigh.

Young-Hee was the type of girl who got rarely sick, so it feels empty to eat alone in a classroom. You thought that it could bring you peace and to be honest, you didn't want to be looked at for eating alone. So here you were, eating alone in a classroom, just minding your business.

« Oh, did I just caught a fish eating alone? » a voice resonated in your ears, breaking the pleasant silence you were in.

Immediately perking your head, your gaze falls upon the ice skater. His tall frame was leaning against the door, his arms crossed with one hand holding a drink.

His eyes had looked you from toes to head, analyzing every details and to be fair, made you slightly uncomfortable. His grin and teasing eyes just made you feel self conscious and you looked away, a slight blush creepig up your face.

« I didn't expect you to be here... What brings you here? you ask softly, resuming on eating your lunch.

- I saw you eating alone, so I thought I could keep you compagny, are you okay with this? » he says, already making his way to take the chair in front of you, pulling it so the back could rest against your desk. He finally plopped down on the chair, facing you directly, propping his forearm on the top of his chair.

- Well... looks like you already eased yourself here, beside, who am I to tell you no? You suck in a sigh, his intense gaze was just urging you to hide in a hole and to never get out of it.

- We didn't get to finish our conversation last time, so why not catching it up now? he asks, looking at the window, the sun rays shining on his handsome face, did he thought he was in a drama? Even the breeze was a paid actor as it made your hair and his leisurely dancing.

- Hum... I'm kinda an awkward girl, you may go on your way...you mutter, dumbfounded as to why someone like him would want to have a conversation with a girl like you, trying to escape guys like death.

- It's okay l'm awkward too, » he chuckles to himself, his head lowering slightly as he does.

Gosh he was beautiful, what did he ate to be this handsome?

« Sung- », a voice called but immediately stopped.

Lee Heeseung was there, and the scene before his eyes was like a bad dream. His close friend, Park Sunghoon is having a face to face conversation with the girl he's trying so hard to catch the attention. Heeseung wondered why it looks easy for his friend to talk to you, he did not understand at the moment why you weren't hostile towards him. If one day Heeseung was being told he got jealous over one of his friend, he would have just laughed it off, shaking his head while mumbling some incoherent things on how it is impossible for him to feel that way.

« What is it hyung? » asks Sunghoon, clearly aware of his senior's intentions with you.

« Well... I didn't expect you two to be together, his eyes were locked on your figure, long time no see Y/ N, » he smiles at you, closing the distance between you three. You couldn't be in a more embarassing situation. Firstly, the tension could be felt from miles, secondly, you never asked to be talked to, and finally, how can it be so hard to be alone these days?

Feeling uneasy, both by their intimidating gazes and their presence, you shakily release a sigh.

« I don't know what I did to you guys... what do you want from me? » you ask, on one hand, not wanting to know their answer, and on the other one, craving to know what their full intentions were.

« Didn't I told ya already? I want you to race with me, » he says nonchalently, shrugging his shoulders.

« And I was clear about it, I don't wanna do it, » you sigh, not really knowing how to formulate your words so he could give it up.

« Racing with Heeseung could be dangerous, that's why I'm never riding with him, » says softly Sunghoon, his expression betraying his voice. But it ceased when his attention finally focused itself on you, the older man glaring at him.

« Don't act like you are not riding like him, » your brows creased, not impressed.

« I don't do cars races, I swear on my lovely dog, » he lifted his hands up, claiming his innocence.

« I don't wanna drive with either of you two, you sigh, closing your eyes, what did I do for you two to want me to ride with you? There's plently of girls in the campus! »

At this point they didn't know if you were really clueless or if you were doing this on purpose. It was as clear as water that Lee Heeseung and Park Sunghoon were hitting on you. We couldn't really blame you: never got confessed, never got a boyfriend, never had male friends after Sunoo so yes, what is love anyways?

Heeseung thought for a while, trying to find a way to make you agree. When the idea comes to him, he smiles brightly and stand in front of you, looking down at you with a smirk.

« How about I buy you those pretty pencils from this one shop near the campus? I noticed that you have a lot of them, » he smiles, proud.

Touché, you felt blocked, because as much as you want to deny it, you always had a things for books and stationery stores. You took care of the esthetic of your belongings and it didn't go unoticed by Lee. Gritting your teeth, your head became fuzzy as well as your thoughts, the tentation was high but a side of you keep reminding you that he was Lee Heeseung, the campus' playboy. You failed to catch the smile of Sunghoon sightly faltering. Freak, Heeseung got a step ahead, and you, who were usually direct to reject him, was now hesitating.

The first time Park Sunghoon came visiting the new city he was gonna moved in, he didn't thought much of it. His introvert character made it hard for him to open up to people. Only on his friends he could lean on and they were everything he needed. Sunghoon didn't planned on falling in love. Indeed he was known for being quite the heartless and cold guy, ignoring confessions and not showing a bit of interest in the opposite gender. His sister and mom were enough for him, he didn't need other women in his life than his family. But fate worked against him when he saw a young girl from his age, crouching near a dog while patting it. His eyes traveled up to see the longstanding crusty letters that formed the two words « Animal center » written on an old building, dilapidated enough to imagine it was there for many years. The girl was standing just behind the opened gate, talking sweetly with the dog in front of her. She looked like she was the happiest on Earth, in her own bubble as her soft chuckles resonated in the silence of the street. Sunghoon was too stunned to speak a word, clearly dazed by the scenery painted in front of his eyes. The golden hour made it look even more beautiful than it was already, melting his icy heart the more he was watching you.

« HUM... Can I help you? » Sunghoon heard a voice calling out to him, stopping him from his dazy state and regaining consciousness. The sight of you was nowhere to be seen as an old granny, smiling softly at him, stood a few meters away from him, eventually blocking him from seeing you.

« Oh, hum, n-no... I was just passing by... » he answered, caught off guard and blushing from embarassment. He quickly bowed before hasting his steps out of sight. At this moment, he believed that he could never see you again.

So the day you splashed your milk onto his shirt, his anger immediately turned into surprise when he saw your face, the image of you patting the dog inked in his brain. He hadn't got the time to speak a word that you were already dashing out of his sight, handing him a tissue while looking down and walking past him.

« How long does a racing lasts? » You ask, reclaiming again Sunghoon's attention on you.

Watching as Heeseung heaved a sigh alongside a sly grin, his face showing nothing else but satisfaction and victory.

« It's tonight, midnight, I will pick you up at 11:30 PM » Heeseung smirks, eyeing you with fancy eyes.

« I didn't ask when it was, I asked about the duration, you sigh, besides I didn't even agreed, you stated and raised a brow at him.

- Yet. If you really wanted to refused you would have already told me no, he smiles, knowing he won, so tell me, are you coming or not? »

Gritting your teeth, you looked everywhere besides the two men in front of you, one eager to know your answer, certain you will say yes. The other, praying you will say no, his eyes not leaving yours.

« Y/N- », begins Sunghoon before getting cut of by Heeseung.

« Come on! First and last time I ask you to! »

« I really hate you... » you mutter enough for them both to hear.

« Shit… » thinks Sunghoon, completely devastated you agreed.

여덟.

« Every day, I enter into a different world

I was a butterfly, attracted to the temptation 

I’ve fallen into a sweet scent

How do I look ? »

Here you were, waiting for Lee Heeseung to come pick you up, your hands tightly grabbing the strap of your purse. Soon enough, you catch a glimpse of a car's headlights. Stopping just in front of you, the driver's door opened to reveal Heeseung. His hair was up, showing his forehead, wearing a dark blue baggy jeans, an oversize black t-shirt with a leather jacket. His looks were complimented by earrings and necklace. And on his face, a smirk was plastered. You could tell he loved what he was seeing.

« Here we go, Mrs Y/N, » he smiles, opening the passagenger's door for you, and you oblige, sitting inside his car. His car was impressive, a black Alfa Romeo Giulia quadrifoglio. « Perfect for his car's racings », you thought to yourself as your eyes wander on the illuminated dashboard. As much as your heart was beating loudly, a part of you was telling you that Lee Heeseung has made a special propose for you to drive with him made you feel unique, until the other part of your brain reminds you that the seat you're currently sitting on had tons of women on it. It gave you chills and a little frown make its place on your face as Heeseung finally eases himself beside you.

« Are you comfy? he asks before stopping himself when looking at your face, I feel like I just kidnapped you while you agreed to come with me. » He chuckles while you refused to look back at him, a small pout on your lips.

« Nothing, hurry so I can go home as fast as I can, » you mumble while looking at the window.

« Alright, received loud and clear. » He smiles before pressing his foot on the pedal, the car dashing at top speed.

You suppress a loud gasp when he does, firmly gripping anything you can grasp. Your heart that was already beating real fast feels like it could explose anytime. You could not even apprehend what was happening at the moment, the city flashing at an incredible speed, soon reaching the small-town.

You try not to pay too much attention on the way he has his left elbow on the ledge of the window, his fingers grazing his lips and the other hand, firmly seizing the steerwheel. Gosh why was he still attractive after all the troubles he did to you?

« Liking the view my lady? » he says, snapping you out of your trance.

« I would be pleased if I could get another one right now. » You answer without missing a beat.

All you recolted was his laugh filling the tensed silence.

« I can say you give your trust easily Y/N, he stated with a grin, you really do look like those children who are seen being proposed some candies by a total stranger, he looks at you for a few seconds before looking back at the road, fallen into the trap. »

«I-, » you tried to answer back but couldn't say anything as it was true.

The rest of the trip was spent in the silence as a soft music played in the background. You were feeling uncomfortable. Mainly because you were not expecting to spend a soiree with a man and mostly Lee Heeseung.

You finally arrived when you see an infinite amount of cars alongside cheerful people, suddenly feeling self-consicous about the situation you're in right now. You didn't think about the fact that Lee Heeseung was very well known in town and so, that everyone surely already knew it was him by the sight of his car. As Heeseung parked right in front of a crowd, he turns his head to look at you. « Just be natural pretty, you will mak’em all speechless » he whispers smoothly, you took a deep breathe, nodding quickly before going out of the vehicule.

« Yo man, came with your new chick? Whistle a man upon seeing you, his eyes roaming up and down your silhouette.

- Yup, m'racing with her tonight, » grins proudly Heeseung, glancing back at you with a glint in his eyes while you roll yours up.

You then noticed how people were staring at you, mixed reactions coming up as you try not to pay attention to it. However, in the corner of your eyes, you notice a familiar body. Park Sunghoon. He was standing alongside the rest of the band. His eyes were fixed on you, a frown visible on his features. This made you uncomfortable. To be honest, everything made you self-conscious and anxious. This wasn't something you were used to, all the ruckus, this seems like another world to you and the dryness in your throat wasn't helping.

« Everyone! I'm gonna list all the races of tonight! » announces a slender men wearing a pair of sunglasses even though it was pitch dark, his long hair hiden behind a red cap.

Soon, everyone turned their attention towards him, listening actively to what he was saying.

« And for the last race, we will have Lee Heeseung against a new opponent! Tonight signs his first participation! Please, welcome Park Sunghoon! » he screams happily as he gestures towards the said man, standing not so far away from you, screams soon invading your ears as your eyes were fixed on him.

You notice the way his face remains close, not a single emotion discernible except for determination. And as your eyes cross each other, a firm grip on your hip made you look up, a low angle-shot of Heeseung's side profile entering your vision.

« Stop staring at him and focus on me. He says lowly only for you to hear.

- And who are you to order me that? You answer him, an eyebrow arched, surprising yourself at the way you could respond with confidence.

- Consider tonight like a date. He grins, finally looking down at you, his eyes flickering between your lips and your eyes.

- ...Tch. » You sigh. You really felt into his trap.

When your turn finally came, your hurriedly walk to go to Heeseung's car, but not before a hand gripped your forearm, yanking you slowly back.

« Can we talk real fast before going? You recognize his voice, it's Sunghoon.

- Okay... but quick. You nod along before isolating yourself with him, Heeseung watching afar not really liking what he is seeing, but the crowd around him make it impossible for him to reach out to you.

- Fuck. » He curses under his breath, feeling his blood boiling in his veins.

Being now a few meters away from all these people, Sunghoon halt his steps and turns around, his eyes immediately falling on your delicate features.

« Listen-

- Sunghoon-, you both started at the same time. He quickly gestures you to keep going as you heave a sigh, why? Why are you participating in this race ? Weren't you the one saying it was dangerous? You frown, your arms crossing against your chest.

- I know, I'm sorry I just... I just.. I think I just can't trust Heeseung hyung with you. He spoke, his words faint as if he was searching for his words. Thanks for the darkness of the sky, you couldn't decipher his red cheeks and ears nor even the way his eyes were looking everywhere but you.

- And why so? » You tilt your head, ignoring the reason behind this reasoning.

Your eyes were fixed on his face as he looks right back at you, determination written on his face.

« Because I… »

You were now in Heeseung's car, your heart beating crazily against your ribcage.

« What happened with Sunghoon? the driver asks, tone colder than a few hours ago.

- Nothing concerning you, you answer slowly, the name of the other man making you anxious.

- Y/N, what did Sunghoon told you? » Heeseung repeats, his voice a bit menacing as he places his car on the left side of the track, a gorgeous woman standing at your right with two flags in her hands. Soon, another vehicule stops just beside you. Not wanting to face Heeseung, you look at the window only to meet Sunghoon's fierce gaze. Your cheeks reddening, you quickly look in front of you, breath stuck in your chest.

« Well, if I win, you better tell me, he scoffs, foot on the pedal, pressing it hardly, both cars' motors roaring up.

- No, you frown, your hands clasping against the belt.

- It wasn't a question, » he finally says as a loud sound comes from an air horn signalling the start of the race.

Your words got stuck in your throat as the car dash at an alluring speed, your hands quickly grabbing the door's handdle to keep yourself steady.

« Fuck you Lee Heeseung for pulling me in this shit, you curse, feeling like your heart could explode anytime.

- The pleasure is mine baby, he smirks, shooting a glance in the rearview mirror, seeing as Sunghoon was close behind you, I can't believe it's his first time, you don't drive like this on your first time, he chuckles lowly, accelerating.

- Well, don't blame me if I end up barfing in your car, you say, breathless as he took a sharp turn on the left, your head almost colliding harshly against the window.

- Mark your territory pretty, » he only chuckles loudly.

It was a close race, one you couldn't tell who will win. And to be honest, you were more on the verge of throwing up and dying than to take care on who was winning. The only thing you could do was to focus on your breathe, cursing here and there and wondering why on earth did you accept to accompagny him, for what? Some dumb stationnary things you could buy yourself?!

In no time, you heard another loud bang of air horn, concluding the end of the race. Your eyes previously closed, opened slowly to reveal the crowd cheering for you.

« Did you win? You ask, voice weak and wet.

- Yup, I won baby, » the playboy declares, quickly opening his door as people were cheering loudly for him.

He quickly blend into the crowd, happily celebrating his victory as you got out of the vehicule, running to a secret corner to throw up. Coughing, tears in your eyes, you felt a striking pain in your head.

« I hate this man so much... kof kof... » you blabber, wiping your mouth with the hem of your hoodie.

You hurriedly dash out of the car once the latter stops in front of your house. The ride back was silent as you had closed your eyes all along, not answering the winner even once.

« Hey, Heeseung spoke, after stepping out of his car too, hands in his pockets, he makes his way towards you, a grin evident adorning his face, care to explain what had happened between you and Sunghoon now that I won?

- No. And after this night, I think I hate you even more, you spat, tiredness written all over your face.

- All right all right, what did I even do this time? he smirks, coming closer to you, his scent invading your nostrils as the wind carries his perfume.

- I... I freaking threw-, » you said before feeling another wave of vomit climbing back up your esophagus, your hand clasping against your lips.

Seeing your state, Heeseung couldn’t help but laugh out loud, his bright smile making you blush.

« It’s alright, just throw up, » he snickers as you walk fast away from him, crouching down near the drain in front of your house. Soon enough, you throw up once more, feeling breathless and thirsty. You then feel two warm hands tying your hair up in a makeshift ponytail, then a delicate hand massaging the back of your neck.

« I’m sorry I had to put you through this, but I had to win, » he smiles, his eyes inked to the back of your head as you cough, a few tears escaping your eyes.

Lee Heeseung, apologizing? This does not goes together very well. But why does he sound so sincere? Did he really meant those words?

« And for what? What did you won? » You ask, spitting not so gracefully in the drain, feeling well aware of his eyes on you, at this point you couldn’t care because your head was throbbing so painfully that receiving a bullet in your skull was the only solution you could think of.

« I was wishing for a chance with you actually, he said unbothered while you choked on your own saliva.

- Are you kidding me? You say, your throat so dry you feel like all the water in your body left you when you threw up.

- Nope, I want you. » he said, crouching down next to you, his fingers cupping your jaw to make you look at him. His thumb coming up to wipe off the saliva at the corner of your lips, the movement making you dizzy.

In the breezy night, it felt like only you and Lee Heeseung remained on Earth as time seems to have stopped. His eyes were hypnotizing you, your breathing stopping as you contemplate each other. For a second, your mind sure felt bewitched by his pupils. You felt like you were drunk, was it the effect of your periods? The fatigue? The stress? Or was it simply because of him?

« Make me love you… you breathed out, quietly.

- Mh? He only hums, slowly approaching his face closer to yours.

- If you so want me… then try to make me love you… you whisper, your ears and cheeks turning crimson as your heartbeat pounded furiously.

- Are you allowing me to? Because once I start, there’s no turning back, and… I will not accept any complain coming from your pretty lips » he mutters, his eyes closing slowly.

On the contrary, your eyes opened wildly, is he really going to kiss you? Like, right now? Your thoughts invaded your brain and without thinking twice, you quickly pushed him away, both your hands on his toned chest before getting up and running towards your house.

« I threw up! You say embarrassed as you fidget with your purse while searching for your keys.

- Wouldn’t have bothered me… » he mumbles to himself as he chuckles, a smirk plastered on his face as he watches you, hands in his pockets.

아홉.

« Farther, a little bit farther, high in the sky

I’ve come a white star as I fly away

Never seen it before 

(Such warm eyes) »

You sigh in relief as you remember that it was Saturday.

« Finally alone! » You huffed softly, stretching out on your bed as birds are chirping.

Thanks to your great organisation, you already did all your homework too, so the weekend will be pretty chill. As you were humming contently, memories of what happened last night flew in your head and you quickly hide your tomato face in your cushions, screaming your frustration out.

« Are you okay girl? A deep voice asks.

- Huh? You’re back?! You instantly lift your head up to look up at your big bro, standing against the door of your room.

- Yup. Why did you screamed like a dead hen? Did you realized you’ll be single for the rest of your life? He grins mockingly.

- Shut up you cow! You spoke back, yeeting a pillow in his direction which he avoids easily.

- Breakfast’s ready, move yo ass down. » He smiles, satisfied before going down the stairs.

Fortunately for you, the breakfast went smoothly, catching up with your brother and spending time with your family is something you particularly enjoy.

« Someone threw up in the drain just in front of our house, if I catch them I’ll send them to Hades! Rumbles your dad as your face turn pale and you gulp down.

- If only you knew Dad… you thought to yourself, once again remembering Heeseung’s lips near yours.

- Hey, why are ya red like this? Smirks your brother, teasing you for the ninth time.

- Eggs are hot, you try to dissuade him, glaring.

- They’ve been on your plate for an hour what do you mean they’re hot? Liar. » He replies back, an eyebrow cocked, not believing you one bit.

You just snort and keep on eating, missing the way your brother’s stare remained on you for a bit longer than usual, examining your face.

**Buzz buzz**

The table trembles slightly as your phone vibrates. All eyes on you as you check your notifications. Some messages from an unknown number. Well…. Not so unknown if you’re being honest because you knew exactly who it was.

« Answer, grins your brother.

- No phone at the table. Strictly orders your mom.

- Mom, your daughter is probably seeing your future son-in-law, snickers your brother which earns a small kick from you under the table, ouch! Why so violent sis?

- The day my daughter will have a boyfriend will be the day your father will stops snoring, your mother chuckles as your phone keeps vibrating, Y/N answer the poor boy.

- …, you watch every member of your family before sighing, okay…, » you mumble, taking your phone and walking away.

You then isolated yourself in the kitchen, a groggy voice reaching your eardrums.

« Hey beautiful, he greets you, the raspy voice being a clue of his recent awakening.

- What? You answer drier than intended, making him chuckle.

- Do you feel better? He asks, his eyes closed as your voice soothe his heart.

- Yes… thank you… for holding up my hair…, you mumble shyly, suddenly embarrassed about the fact you actually threw up before a human other than your family.

- Are you free? I want to see you. His tone sounded so pleading, you thought for a second.

- …Let’s buy what you had promised me, you whisper softly, unconsciously smiling.

- All right, will be here in 20, » he says, making a kissing sound before hanging up.

Your cheeks flushed when you realized he sent you a flying kiss. Before quickly shaking your head and slapping your cheeks. « Get your shot together Y/N! » you think to yourself.

« It was cheesy sis, sneers your brother peeking through the door, I actually can’t believe my sister has a date like right now, by the way can you run some errands for me? I will send you by texts. Thank you! He quickly says before disappearing.

- This kid I swear, I wonder if I’m not the older sister sometimes. » You roll your eyes up before quickly preparing yourself.

« Is it a date? Is it not? » After all, Heeseung did promised to buy you some stationery items, right? So he was just fulfilling his promise, right? So why couldn’t you stop the speed of your heart nor the unstopping back and forth thoughts in your head? Twenty minutes flew by in an instant and you were nervously waiting for him in front of the gates.

A loud roaring takes your attention as you search for the familiar car of last night. Here you see Heeseung’s impressive car, stopping in front of you.

« Tut-tut-tut, before you go lemme do a small check, cut off your dad, surprisingly standing next to you, I gotta see who is taking my daughter away from me.

- Dad it’s not a date..! You mumble between gritted teeth as you watch anxiously the way Heeseung got out of his car to come to you.

- That’s what your mom told her dad on the first date with me, he scoffs before examining Heeseung from head to toe.

- Good morning, I’m Lee Heeseung, » the latter says, extending his hand after bowing politely to your dad.

Your dad only shakes the younger man’s hand, his grip strongly engulfing Heeseung’s one. He puts some more pressure on his grip before Heeseung tightens his too making your dad chuckles shortly.

« 11 PM, not one second more, » he just said before turning his heels away and going back home.

You scoff at what he said, rolling your eyes up.

« I‘ll be home earlier than that, » you shake your head in disbelief.

Lee Heeseung could only smile as he opens the door for you, before going to the driver seats and driving you two in direction of your favorite shop.

열.

« Deeply place me in your universe

(I’ll close my eyes) 

Take me far away

And make me love you »

8 PM, you couldn’t believe your eyes as you saw the time. Did you just spent a whole day with the man you thought hated from your deepest guts? The day flew by so quickly you did not even noticed it. And you hated to admit it but you had a great time with him. It almost felt too real to be true.

You were sitting on a bench, facing a lake as some shopping bags were at your feet, a respectable distance between you and Heeseung.

**Buzz buzz**

Your phone vibrates as you were staring at the female duck and her children swimming in the water.

« Ayo sis, I’m sending you what I need, just go to the 24/7 store! Thank you! » was the text your brother sent you before a list followed right after.

« - Cigarettes

- Lighter

- Candies

- Lube

- Condoms- »

You cough out loud, almost throwing out your phone in the lake as you saw the two last items he needed.

« Is everything okay? Heeseung asks with a small frown upon seeing you coughing badly.

- Y-yeah…yeah yeah… you chuckle it off, looking elsewhere but him.

- Do you want to go home? I will drive you-

- No actually I need to buy some stuff for my brother you can go ahead, I’ll go home alone, you smile sheepishly.

- Your dad’s gonna kill me if he ever learn I let you go home alone, Heeseung responds, and he was right, besides, I do want to drive you home, » he smiles softly, grazing his eyes over your features.

You could only sigh. Secretly noticing how the Lee Heeseung you knew in college wasn’t the same one standing in front of you.

« Well… why should I be shy since you saw me spitting out my intestines? You finally say before standing back up on your feet. Let’s go, » your turn to face him, his eyes staring up at you.

You didn’t noticed the awkward feeling right away but now it was eating you up as you were in the aisle presenting every brand of condoms that existed.

« Did I miss a hint from you? Smirks Heeseung, a box of condoms in his hand as he fixes the product.

- Stop it, I already want to bury myself alive right now, you whisper lowly, checking your surroundings like a psycho every two seconds, checking if someone is witnessing you.

- Should I help you out? These ones are great, he said, pointing a particular brand on a shelf.

- God, I didn’t have to know! You bite down on your lower lip, heat quickly spreading across your cheeks and your chest.

- And for the lube, take this one, » he says softly, ignoring your words, his body suddenly behind you as he reaches for a box of lube, the proximity making you breathless.

It seems like you stopped working as you couldn’t answer him nor move. So Heeseung took the matter in his hands and grabs the necessary items in one hand and your own hand in his other before leading you to the cashier. He then puts down the items that were quickly scanned by the young lady, eyeing you not so secretly.

« 28080.55₩, announces the lady.

- W-what?! Twenty thousand freaking won for some condoms and lube?! You thought to yourself before a little sound comes from the POS machine, indicating that the payment was done.

- Thank you! Have a great night! Bow the cashier before you couldn’t even process anything.

- Let’s go, » says Heeseung, grabbing the plastic bag and your hand, leading you outside.

You only snapped back to reality once the cold wind hit your face.

« Why did you paid for it?! And why did you choose the most expensive ones?! Twenty thousand won for condoms and lube were not worth it!

- If we want to do it correctly, the price is not important, he grins, tilting his head curiously.

- It’s not for me! You blush furiously, looking away and walking towards his car, let’s go home now.

- Should we eat a bit before I drive you home? He offers.

- …Then let me pay for it, you suggest after taking a few seconds to think.

- Alright princess, » he smiles as you both enter his car.

Like promised, Lee Heeseung let you pay for the dinner. You didn’t know if he was doing it on purpose or not, but his menu was cheaper than you, almost making you believe that he didn’t wanted you to pay a crazy amount.

« Are you sure this will be enough? You only took some fries and a soda… you mutter, looking down at his tray.

- Don’t worry, just eat, he shakes his head, plopping one fries in between in lips, slowly munching on it as he stares at the window.

- Here… you extend your untouched burger close to his mouth, your lips in a thin line. Hurry before I take it out. »

Heeseung looks at you with wide eyes before a warm smile spread onto his lips, holding onto the eye contact as he bites in the burger. His hand engulfs yours placed on the burger as he munches slowly. You then noticed how his fingers are long and slim, bigger than yours.

« Liking the view? His words seemed oddly familiar, reminding you of the scenes that happened earlier this weekend, finding it odd how everything changed in only a week.

- It’s not too bad, you answer boldly this time, keeping the eye contact.

- Want to see more? He grins.

- Nope, no more, don’t cross the line, you suddenly stopped him, his eyes going wide, a shocked expression before he burst out laughing, what? You ask, in disbelief.

- Nah you’re just cute, » he says, his chin on his palm, watching you endearingly as you eat your burger.

You stopped in front of your house’s gates, turning around.

« Thank you, I guess? » You say in a sigh.

Heeseung comes close to you, taking the bags from your hands and putting them down.

« I’ve never in my life waited this long, he mumbled, hands clasping around yours.

- For what? You ask a bit incredulous, palms sweating as the unusual feeling creeping in your chest comes again.

- After everything I’ve done to you, you’re still clueless of my intentions? I even said it to you multiple times already, he chuckles, incredulously.

- It doesn’t change the fact that you’re a playboy Heeseung…

- Do you want me to stop? He grins, a loving beam in his eyes.

- And what if you do? You answer back, looking up at him, getting lost in his eyes.

- Then I can have you for myself, he whispers, leaning dangerously close to you.

- I don’t know… you speak softly, voice fainter and fainter.

- If I give you something you longed for ever since, will you let me kiss you? He stares deeply in your eyes, searching for any hints of rejection, none besides hesitation.

- Depends… » you say, not really sure what he meant by that.

He fiddles with something in his pocket before a too familiar stringed bracelet comes into your field of view: the one your childhood’s friend gifted you, your anti stress.

« How…

- It fell when you were escaping Jake the other day, he gave me this and I knew it belonged to you when you came back searching for it, he whispers as he ties it back around your wrist.

- Thank you… for the day… for the bracelet, you trail off, not taking your eyes off from the simple but precious accessory on your wrist.

- It’s okay… he murmurs, his finger lifting your chin up, so is that a yes? You’re not going to reject me now, right? You didn’t threw up nor-

- Hurry up before I change my mind! You hiss, blushing and hitting his chest lightly.

- I love you. »

His words caught you off guard as his lips meet yours in a sweet kiss. Warmth spreading everywhere in your body as you felt butterflies in your stomach. Kissing Lee Heeseung was so easy, he made it so easy by taking the lead, kisses intoxicating your trail of thoughts.

His gentle bite on your bottom lip made you gasp, his wet muscle quickly claiming yours in a burning tango.

From his point of view, Heeseung sneakily slide his hands on your hips, grabbing them firmly as he practically presses his body to yours. His eyes half opened to see the way your eyes fluttered or the way your cheeks flushed. His heart couldn’t take any more of it, pounding in sync with yours.

« Gosh you make me go insane Y/N… he whispers against your lips, heavy breathing as you both seems in a trance, forehead finally joining.

- I hate you…you lie, looking away.

- You’re so sneaky Y/N, » he chuckles, ready to capture your lips for another kiss.

A loud gasp emitted from behind you as you quickly step away from Heeseung, turning around to see your brother.

« Sorry to interrupt but… Lil sis, do you have my condoms? »

« K-kiss you, t-touch you, w-want you »

« Make me love you »

END.

Your Highness!

We are delighted to see you here!

After a long break, our Queen had finally decided to wake up and had works her magic again!

She charged me to inform you about her ongoing activities! Lots of things are happening so we are hoping you will enjoy them!

Apologizing for taking so long to come back, we wish you a happy day.

- Butler of the castle.