#except when i wanted to go read fanfics i learnt that there was way more ffvii than i thought

[thisfairytalegonebad]

there is just something about having a job that makes your brain not want to think about fictional little guys anymore, but apparently it can come back after a while!

i've actually been more consistent about doing art than about writing (i still don't do it very frequently though. i usually try to draw something every couple months). to be fair, there is a lot of art that never sees the light of day because i'm not happy with how it's going. and i'm still a lot better at editing existing images than i am at making something from scratch

actually like two weeks ago i found the folder of art of the ffxv boys i drew on that camping trip three years ago, and while i think that they look a bit wonky, i'm still kinda proud of them

i saw that you left a comment! i'll have to remember to reply to it!

one of these days i'll have to play ffvii (probably the original because of hardware limitations). i hear that it's good, but more importantly i need to finally learn what the deal with that cloud guy is

Absolutely horrible, hate it! Not only does having a job take away way too much of your free time, it also makes you stop thinking about your blorbos.... how many more sacrifices do we have to make?! It's great when it comes back though, god knows working life is much, much nicer when you can rotate some blorbos to pass the time.

Oh man, that's so cool, good for you on actually actively doing something to improve your art, that's amazing and I'm really proud of you <3 And I still think of those ffxv artpieces very fondly, they were lovely and I appreciated you sharing them with me so much!

Tbh I wasn't a huge fan of the original ffvii, but that was mostly due to gameplay reasons, I just couldn't get into the combat system and the character models were... well, it's a game from 1997 and it shows. The story was pretty neat, though I'm definitely looking forward to playing the story again in the form of the remake with a combat system that actually lets me run around (although they changed some stuff in the story and are probably gonna change quite some more things in the next two remake installments). But yeah, Cloud, Cloud is lovely, he's a very messed up emo boy, not at all the type of boy I go for most of the time but by god, I adore him. He's very cute. And very fucked up, needs a hug very badly. I mainly got into the whole thing because I played remake and was like "well now I really wanna read some fanfics where he fuckin suffers" because that's how we do things round here

[lovelaurs]

hi!! i really like your writing:) you followed me last night and i was So Confused because i don’t post i just repost with stupid tags HAHA if you can and your requests are open (i checked like 29 times and read the rules and im still scared im gonna mess this up and i missed something), can you write a suggestive mcd garroth and laurance little drabble? if you want a direction to go in, i really like fanfics where they fight and it turns into a suggestive bit ^_^ thanks so much aahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!

TRAINING TOGETHER

featuring : mcd garroth & laurance x gn reader synopsis : after deciding to train to be a guard, you seek the help of none other then a knight from phoenix drop. yet, after a tough training session, things begin to get a bit out of hand... tags : mature, romance, friends to lovers, sword-fighting, training, kissing, making out, suggestive word count : 2.5k | around 1.2k per character! a/n : woohoo, my first request done! this was really fun to write, so i hope you enjoy!! these two were so silly to write, i just love them so much!

MASTERLIST

GARROTH

As someone who has always dreamt of being a guard, you didn’t exactly have the schedule of one.

After sleeping in for what seemed later than normal, your eyes quickly shot open as you remembered what today was.

Shit.

Your weekly training with Garroth was this morning.

As you quickly shot up from your bed, you ran around your house putting on the first pieces of clothing you could find.

After slipping over a plain tunic along with some boots, you swung open your door, slamming it behind you as you sprinted towards the training grounds.

As you passed through the town, many of the other villagers looked at you with amusement as you exhausted yourself on the way there. They had gotten used to watching you run late to almost everything.

Ever since you were younger, you had always aimed to be a guard.

Except, with the village guards being scarce and always so busy, you were never able to train. This was the very reason that got you rejected from the training program in O’khasis.

Of course, since things have been more and more easier under Lord Aphmau’s rule, the guards have increased, and with that, so has their availability.

After seeking out a guard to help train you, the Head Guard, Garroth, gladly accepted. Even though he himself learnt his sword-fighting in O’khasis, he always mentioned that it wasn’t required to make a good guard, and that all that mattered was the strength in one’s loyalty.

Since you met him from when he arrived, he always showed himself to be loyal.

Ever since then, your hopes have been raised.

It has been weeks since you began training with him, your sword-fighting skills increasing almost tenfold since the first day.

And yet one thing has never changed.

Your tardiness.

As arrived at the training grounds, you keeled over, hands on your knees as you breathed deeply. A disapproving Garroth watched from afar, smiling at the scene.

“Yet again you're late.” He noted, leaning against the guard tower.

“Yeah,” You panted. “No shit.” 

He frowned at your response. “Watch your tone, we’re supposed to be prepping you to be a guard, remember? Guards do not speak that way.” As you finally caught your breath, you stood up straight, nodding. “Right… I’m sorry.” “Great.” Garroth pushed himself off the bricks, reaching for his sword. “Now, are you ready to begin our training that was supposed to start at sunrise?” He teased.

“Haha, very funny.” You sighed at the remark, reaching for the hilt of your sword… before finding it not there.

You frantically patted yourself down, quickly realizing that you had forgotten your sword at home.

“You know, I was waiting for you to notice.” Garroth chuckled. He motioned his head towards the guard tower. “Go grab an extra sword from the armory.” You groaned as you made your way over there, picking up a random sword. 

As you made your way back over to the training grounds, you noticed Garroth watched you with a smirk.

All you wanted was to wipe that stupid look off his face.

As you took your position, readying your sword in front of you, you let your eyes focus on the trained knight before you.

This man had been trained amongst would be Jury Of Nine members, so of course he’d be tough to beat.

It wasn’t until he counted down that you brought yourself back to the present, focusing.

As the word “go” left his mouth, he rushed towards you, unrelenting on his force.

His first contact with your sword was strong, catching you off guard. You held your stance, pushing against his blade, causing him to jump back to regain his own footing.

“Nice defense, your hold is getting stronger.” He smirked, slowly circling you like a shark staring down its prey.

As it seemed he was going to keep taunting you, never truly moving towards you, you decided to take the opportunity to take the lead.

You rushed towards him, putting all your strength into the swing of your sword as it collided with his.

He held his stance, before you both pulled back, colliding your swords once more.

It wasn’t until you shared several more blows that you started to feel sweat pooling on your forehead. This singular match has gone on longer than your usual time, so it wasn’t surprising that your muscles started to ache in response.

Out of nowhere, Garroth swung his sword with all his might, causing your own blade to go flying off towards the bushes behind you.

As you fell to the ground, the blonde stood above you, holding his sword towards your throat.

“You need to work on your grip.” He heaved, before sheathing his sword, offering his hand out to you with a smile.

That’s when you thought of something devious.

You swept your leg under his, causing him to fall on top of you with an “Oof!”.

“And you should work on your stance.” You giggled. 

Garroth adjusted himself, his hands caging you in on both sides of your shoulders. As he took notice of your current position, he paused, just looking at you in the eyes.

You couldn’t help notice just how beautiful his cerulean eyes were. You were so lost within the blue that you didn’t notice how his pupils dilated, his position above you growing stiff.

It was then that his eyes wandered down to your lips, almost watching them impatiently.

With that, you practically couldn’t stop yourself from looping your arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

As the two of you sat in silence, it wasn’t long before Garroth spoke.

“Can… Can I kiss you?”

A sense of wonder filled his eyes as he watched your expression switch into one of joy.

You smiled, slightly tilting your head. “Yes.” When he kissed you, it felt like all pieces of a puzzle were finally connected. With his lips locked against yours, you savored the feeling as much as possible.

He pulled back for a breath for only about five seconds before diving back to kiss you once again.

His lips hurriedly pressed against yours as if the two of you were running out of time and his goal was to taste your lips on a dying breath.

As if a knee-jerk reaction, you slowly moved your hands from around his neck to his hips, pulling his lower half closer. Garroth couldn’t help but groan at the friction.

His face was flushed, tinted pink all the way to the tips of his ears.

As you lay beneath the blushing blonde, it wasn’t long before your perfect moment was interrupted.

“Sir Garroth! Come quick! Kiki’s animals got loose and-”

The two of you whipped your heads around to see a dirtied Dante, covered in hoove marks and mud, looking at you both all flustered.

He quickly brought his hand to his face, covering his eyes. “Oh my- uh, nevermind! I’m sorry to interrupt-” He stuttered as he began to quickly rush away.

Garroth stumbled off of you, rolling over in the grass before stumbling as he went to chase after Dante “W-Wait! It’s not what it looks like!”

You couldn’t help but giggle at the guard’s reaction to being caught, catching his attention.

He turned around, puffing his cheeks. “Don’t think you’re getting away from this!” He yelled, before giving you a soft smirk. “I’ll swing by your house later this evening to continue where we left off, okay?”

And with that, he ran after the younger blue-haired knight.

Now it was your turn to flush, as your mind conjured up several images within your mind that left not much to the imagination.

And you just couldn’t wait.

LAURANCE

Who in Irene’s name suggests training in the middle of the woods?

As you made your way through the shrubbery, pushing aside all sorts of branches and leaves, you kept asking yourself if you were going the right way.

When you left the gates of Phoenix Drop earlier in the day, you felt something in your stomach twist. Perhaps it was a bad omen as to your situation now?

The training area Laurance had told you to meet at was somewhat northwest of the wall, in a clearing in which you could see the ocean.

As if such directions would be easy to follow within an overgrown forest such as this!

He had originally suggested it in an empty area so the two of you “could have no distractions”, which in hindsight, you seriously should have doubted more. That charmer of a man always had ulterior motives.

The brunette himself had gone ahead of you earlier in the day, saying he’d set up the area with equipment and some rations. 

Why the hell did you let him go ahead of you?!

As you continued to stumble over tree roots and unforeseen rocks, your eyes eventually caught sight of the ocean.

You had to be close!

You continued to trudge forward, your new boots practically covered in dirt. As you made your way into the clearing, you saw Laurance polishing his sword, his hair tied up into a small ponytail.

While you approached him, you stepped on a twig, alerting him of your presence.

“Took you long enough.” He smirked, raising his head to look at you. “For a minute I was beginning to think you stood me up.”

You scoffed, taking off your satchel and placing it next to what seemed to be the bag of rations he had brought. “Maybe I would have gotten here sooner if someone had at least made it more obvious where this “secret” area was.” 

“You do know what the word secret means, do you not?” He chuckled. “And besides, I’m sort of glad you had to stumble through the woods by yourself. I mean, just look at the state you’re in right now!” He held back a laugh, covering his mouth with his hand as he pointed at you.

You quickly looked around your clothes, seeing countless spots of dirt littered across it, before patting your head to find leaves scattered amongst your hair. You picked out as many twigs from your hair as you could before finally dusting yourself off.

You swung your head back towards his direction with a pout. “I can’t stand you.”

He smiled at the comment, before standing up with his sword in hand, throwing away the cloth he used to polish the blade beforehand.

“So, are you ready to face the all mighty, powerful Laurance?” You guffawed at the comment. “My, it seems you're even more full of yourself than usual.” You unsheathed your own blade in response.

As the two of you began to circle the area, an unspoken commencement of the training between you two, you kept distance from the brunette as you surveyed his moves.

You kept watching his stance, waiting for an opening, until out of chance his foot slipped up just slightly.

Perfect.

You lept towards him, raising your blade above your head before bringing it down with such might that even he was surprised. 

He blocked it easily, sure, but his stance was still unstable. Your first move had caused him to move his feet to re-adjust himself.

A great play indeed.

Your eyes watched as he let his feet move back.

He must have sensed your motives, as his eyes followed yours to his feet. Of course, being the trained guard he was, he wasn’t about to just let you defeat him so easily from a minor slip-up.

The Shadow Knight decided to turn the tables on you, swooping beneath your own feet, causing you to slam into the ground.

He followed you soon after, pushing his sword against yours whilst on top of you. Your eyes trailed over his body, trying to find a weak spot to escape your soon defeat.

Soon, your eyes landed on the side of his lower abdomen, and your foot instinctively kicked him, causing him to fall off to the side.

You took the chance and jumped onto him, your knee pinning down the arm in which he held his sword, with your own blade aimed at his neck.

As you straddled his waist, pinning him down by your blade, you couldn’t help but breath heavily.

“I won.” You smiled, watching as his light blue eyes never left your own. “I won!” You repeated, only this time cheering.

He smirked as you took pride in your victory. “Really? Because right now it really feels like I won.” His eyes wandered, looking you up and down.

You couldn’t help but slightly flush, realizing the position the two of you were in. “You know I can slit your throat if I wanted to, right?” “And yet you don’t seem to be doing it.” He smiled smugly. “Seems to me that you might care for little ol’ Laurance.”

You rolled your eyes as you sheathed your sword back within your scabbard. “In your dreams.” You responded, before turning to get off of the knight.

That was when he grabbed your hand, pulling you flush against him, before he rolled you both over; switching your positions.

As he towered over you on the ground, he brought his hand to your cheek, cupping it gently, before whispering your name.

Your face flushed, the color change obvious enough for Laurance to notice with a smirk. He began to lean down, closing in the proximity between the two of you.

Before simply plucking a stray leaf from your hair.

“You missed a spot.” This. Asshole.

The look of disappointment seemed to have shown as your face, as his smug grin grew even wider. “Hm? What’s wrong? You look a bit frustrated.” He teased, basking in the fruits of his actions.

You puffed your cheeks, sighing. “You know, if you’re thinking about doing something, just go ahead and do it instead of humiliating me.”

A confused look spread across his face before he smiled again, leaning closer to you. “So you do want me.”

“Shut up and kiss me already.”

It took only a moment for that to process in his brain before he swooped in and planted his lips upon yours.

Your heart fluttered as you felt Laurance battle to take the lead. His lips almost fight against yours as if you were dueling once more.

At some point, you decided to just let him win, seeing as you beat him in your duel.

That’s when he turned you over, both of you laying on your sides as his hands flew to grip your hips. The action caused you to let out a gasp on Laurance's lips, which he took as an opportunity to let his tongue explore. His knee popped up in response, placing itself between your thighs.

You felt like you were going to die. From the way he kissed you, to the grip he had on your hips, and the friction he was causing between your legs? Oh my Irene, it was incredible.

As he pulled back to take a breath, you suddenly realized the two of you were outside… anyone could see you.

But your worries were quickly assuaged as you realized… This place was secret after all.

@lovelaurs, 2024. do not repost this work in any way!

[saemi-the-dreamer]

For the ask meme, Emma /Knightley from Jane Austen's Emma or you'd rather/ if you haven't read Emma, Elinor/Edward from Sense and Sensibility) and Damon Gant/Manfred von Karma from Ace Attorney?

Thanks for asking! 💕

Emma /Knightley

Ship It? Yes!

What made you ship it?

I admit that I wasn't especially rooting/shipping them while I read the book the first time, even if I didn't hate it! I was re-reading it after watching the 1996 series (that and the 1996 TV movie are the only adaptations I've watched entirely) and the ship seemed more natural years later. It's been a while, so I'm sorry for not being able to go into too much detail. Still, something I really love about how these two are portrayed is how the two can be honest and call each other out when needed (thinking about the "Badly done, Emma!" scene) without having the other overreacting or turning into a huge, unnecessary drama, on the contrary, they stop and think about their own behaviour. It's so important, especially in Emma, the heroine gets a pass for a good half of the story, nobody except Knightley argues with her, so for all this time she doesn't take him as seriously as she should, and is even smug when she sees that Harriet followed her advice whereas Robert didn't listen to Knightley's (which wasn't even the point of Knightley's frustration btw).

I guess that I like the dynamic where an overconfident character gets paired up with another who doesn't hesitate to call them on their bullshit, and who is their equal? xD Plus, I recall that Knightley's confession was very poignant... I need to re-read it!!

What are your favourite things about the ship?

Since Emma is not my favourite Jane Austen story, and I only learnt to really appreciate it later and I require re-read it, I can't say for sure. I'd say that I really like how the two have known each other forever - literally, Knightley held Emma in his arms when she was a baby! Talk about a "slow burn"! It's interesting to imagine how the two went through so many stages of life together, saw each other grow and mature, how the way they looked at one another shifted, and how their feelings changed and they could hardly help it. There's something quite natural in this that I like.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

The age gap isn't that bad, especially in context! Or more unpopular I guess: the story didn't need to be "modernised" for today's audience (looking at the 2020 adaptation). For fuck's sake, can't people just accept that things were different back then?! And still be able to say "I'm letting it slide because of context, it's fictional and it works here (❤️) but I wouldn't accept it in real life.". I don't like that they made Knightley younger, and changed the dynamic with Emma that much (from what I've seen), it was unnecessary and just to cater to some holier-than-thous. They could have kept an older Knightley and added some scenes to show his softer, more vulnerable side.

---------------------------------------------------

Gant/Manfred

Ship It? Yes!

What made you ship it?

The fandom made me! 😂

After finishing the first Ace Attorney (the version with "Rise from the Ashes" of course) I went and browsed the internet to find some art and fanfics, and then I discovered the Kink Meme. It's there that I've stumbled upon the pairing. There was also some pretty fanart of them, younger, investigating together. I started to really like the idea of them being both old colleagues (and lovers, having a torrid affair in Gant's office 🤣).

What are your favourite things about the ship?

The potential for two dynamics:

A) an "evil" power couple, with the two just being unapologetic, ambitious, ruthless men. And these two keep bickering like an old couple, and it's a mess of arguments and make-up sex, the two manically laughing as they tempered evidence, etc. (okay, I know I'm going overbroad here, I'm kidding! xD )

B) "We're both disillusioned by a corrupted system, at first we really wanted to make it honestly, then we started getting our hands dirty and now we can't go back or stop. We're colleagues, partners in crime, weird friends... sometimes lovers. We're both messed up, but we don't care anymore, as long as we achieve our goals and have each other."

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Since I mostly low-key ship them and haven't found that many stories about them, I don't think I have one? Otherwise, it's more an unpopular opinion about each one of them, not the pairing?

I'd say that I don't believe either of them ever sexually harassed or "seduced" Miles......................... 😒

[wickedlyqueer]

3 and 8 for the fic ask (and 19, if you have stuff you wanna share 👀)

Okay, it's way past my bedtime and I'll hate myself in the morning for staying up this late when i need to go to work, but fuck it. i want to answer this!

3. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

Oooh that's a rough one. If it's like your favorite fic storywise, it has to be Wiretapped Life. I went all out for that fic, and I'm still so, so proud of it.

If it means like a fic that I enjoyed writing the most, it's probably a one-shot where I just sit down and write it like a maniac within like two to three days. It's just so nice to be in a flow like that. Of all of those, the Victorian AU (rotting corpses lay to rest (where flowers ought to bloom)) had the best writing flow of them all. and it shows, because it's proportionally more bookmarked than my other fics.

8. What project(s) are you currently working on?

OKAY. So!! There's one fic I've been calling the "Shimmer AU" and I've been working on it for three years. The reason nobody (except my beta) has read any of it is because I decided very early on I'd complete it in one go and do a "weekly release".

I have since learnt, this method does not work for me (!!), but i still want this to have a weekly release. I'm nearly done with it and I'm aiming for it to be completed around August.

So, what's it about? Well, for one it has its own magic system. And this is the synopsis that's been on my page for a while: Glinda is a graduate of the All Girls’ Academy for Magic and Sorcery, Fae is a homebrewing witch. Their magic could not be more different, and their pull to one another not more enticing.

Then there's another multichapter fic I recently brew up and is now simmering in my brain. That is to say, it's very early stages and I'm still drafting, but the very basic outline is there. I'm incredibly excited to start working on it after I finished writing the Shimmer AU. All I will say for now... it's a multiverse fic and its gonna be juicy 👀

19. Give us a small teaser from one of your WIPs.

I have shared a few snippets of the Shimmer AU here and there over the years I believe, but I don't think I've ever mentioned this fic actually starts with Glinda/Milla so, here you go:

“That’s the thing though,” Milla said as she grabbed some plates out of the cupperboard. “Any of those girls would have treated you like a princess. While I don’t.” She chuckled. “Are you about to set me up with one of your lesbian friends?” “No, because you’d run away screaming from the others. You’ve been treated like a princess your whole life, and you fucking hate it.” “Hm.” “You need someone who doesn’t give in easily, who doesn’t mind speaking against your wishes. Pushes back a little,” Milla plucked a slice of carrot from the pan, popped it into her mouth and gave Glinda a grin, “and that someone is me.”

Ask me a fanfic question

[fezwearingjellybananas]

Get to know the writer 2 13 19 27 75 💞

2. Do you plan each chapter ahead or write as you go?

I try and have a general plan of where things are going, but I don't necessarily plan individual chapters, I just put in breaks sometimes if it feels like a good moment (which is why Sweet Defiance is over 25k all in one chapter, I just kept writing and didn't really stop and think I need a break at any point, and I didn't realise how long it was until it was done. The Night Shift is also over 25k all in one chapter, and that's mostly because I didn't pick a point to break it up while I was writing and partly because I did actually consider splitting it into chapters when I looked at the word count part way through and during editing, probably three chapters, but the chapter titles that made sense from where I probably would have split it for the first two were Overground and Underground and then I couldn't think of a third title because I just kept getting the Wombles stuck in my head instead, so I scraped the chapters).

The exception for planning individual chapters was the Milk and Sugar 'verse, but that's because I used the episodes from canon as a lay-out for the chapters, and I planned all the fics out as I was going, though some still changed at the last minute because I had a different idea that fit what I had already written more.

13. What’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

Use said. It's definitely something I've been trying to add more and more- when I first started writing fic I was still using the way we learnt in school where you only need the dialogue tags at the start and you just alternate paragraphs and you should be able to make it clear who is speaking from that, but throwing in extra saids every so often makes it much clearer, so it's something I have been consciously working on trying to do more for a while.

19. What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

Alternate Universe- Canon Divergent. It's the one I find most fun to play around with, how will changing this part of the story here ripple out to change the rest of it

27. What is your most and least favorite part of writing?

I enjoy writing, that's why I do it, so it's actually hard to pick a favourite and I tend to have a different answer every time I get asked, but when you first get an idea and sit down to write and know this one's going to be fun, that's pretty good.

I guess least favourite, maybe editing when there's a lot of it? I use the read aloud function to edit, because I've found before I've clicked the wrong correction on spell check and not noticed until someone else has told me before, and it's a lot easier to hear when words are wrong than it is to see. And because I like to be able to jump back and forth as I write a little, I will write the whole thing then post it, so my last big fic, Gone in a Flash, is 78k and 29 chapters, which I ended up splitting so I would edit one chapter fully, then post it the following day (reading the whole thing again when I copied it into the AO3 text box), and after posting I would go and listen to and fully edit the next chapter. Which did work as a system, and I don't mind editing, I think it's just I had been working on it for a year, I was excited to finally share it, and there was this part still to do even though it felt finished, and because there was a lot of doing that there were a few parts it felt repetitive.

75. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it? 

Sticking with Gone in a Flash, it had a few sticky moments, but I think when I got to Chapter 13/14, it felt like I was writing myself into a corner, there was only one option for where the characters could go from here but it wouldn't go their way, so I rewrote a few parts from Chapter 12 onwards a few times and it still kept circling back to this is where the plot wants them to be.

Luckily time travelling is a common thing in any Flash media and it was already part of the fic, so shifting the end of Chapter 14 to have some time travel meant they still ended up at that point, but there was a way to take it forwards from there (by going backwards again)

Thank you!

[Writing Asks]

[pebblysand]

okay so i just saw this on my dash and as someone who's been writing in fandom for over 15 years, including two long works which were posted over long periods of time (18 months for the first one, 3 years and counting for the second), i actually have a lot to say about this.

now, the first thing i want to say, anon, is: god, i feel you, it's So Hard. you see all of these little voices in your comment section, boosting you and cheerleading your story, and then they drop out. the first chapter goes by and you're like: okay, maybe they haven't had time, then another one, then another one. and, you assume automatically that you are the one doing something wrong. that this story mustn't be interesting enough to hold people's interest - it's easy to spiral.

now, i have good news and bad news: this is both true, and not. this is true in the way that if you think about it in very basic terms, this person/these people have dropped out your story. so, yeah, in a way, it probably wasn't worth their time anymore.

but what you need to know is that this is actually very rarely, if ever, about you or your story. the truth is that: growth in content creation on the internet is not linear. especially with long-works that you post over multiple months and years. with these, you're actually subject to tidal waves of people going in, and leaving all of the time. youtuber lucy moon recently made a tiktok about this where she explained that it was the 3rd time in her 6/7 year career that she hit a 100k on instagram. because, as she puts it: "you hit it, then people get tired of your face, they unfollow you, new people come in, etc."

now, the thing is, when you're a youtuber with hundreds of thousands of subs, you might not notice it day-to-day, but when you're a fanfic writer with a certain number of comments per chapter from people who's pseuds you've learnt to recognise, it is so easy to notice when someone drops off, which obviously makes it also easier to question yourself. additionally, people typically find fics in doves. you'll get recced by one big account for example, or mentioned in a big discord, and suddenly, all these news followers will appear. so, unfortunately, a lot of the time, a lot of these people will drop off around the same time (for reasons cited below), which will feel like it's a mass phenomenon. but again, it's probably not about your fic.

being very candid here for a minute, i went through this myself a few months/weeks ago. i posted chapter 16 of my fic last spring, which did really well, then 17 over the summer, which did a bit worse but still good enough, then 18 in october (which OMG was a chapter i cared so much about) and which did terribly, and then suddenly, all of my engagement (and more) came back for 19 in november. and trust me, when i was in that low tide after publishing chapter 18, i agonised over what i did wrong. are my chapters too long? did the quality of my writing go down? was the plot hard to follow?

now, of course, these are all possibilities, i'm not going to lie to you. but most likely, people dropping off is a combination of these factors:

seasonal factors: my real job is one where the beginning of the year (january to march) is very busy, but the end of the year is not. so, i post a lot more at the end of the year. except, i've noticed... that's not the case for most people. most industries are actually busier at the end of the year and as a result, because obviously fic is a hobby, people have less time to spend on it between october and december. so, over that period, you might either 1) get a lot less engagement altogether or 2) have that engagement be delayed. i'll typically see a surge at the weekends, or during the holidays themselves, when people are off work and catching up on fanfic when they have more time. again, don't panic, this might just be seasonal.

the lull of the last handful of chapters: now, even for people who read WIPs, when you reach the last third of your chapters, a lot of people will think that: well, i'll just wait until everything is published to read. is it hard? yes. does it suck? yes. but that's just the way some people think. so, if you see your engagement drop in the last third of your story, know that this might be the reason.

people outgrowing fandom: honestly, the truth is that a lot of these people might have dropped out of fandom altogether. people drop out of fandom All The Time. for reasons that have nothing to do with your particular story. they just - have a life. jobs, parents, whatever. fanfic and fandom always takes the first hit, it's always the first thing that has to go when people get busy. and, we've all seen how doves of people joined/rejoined fandom during the pandemic, then slowly filed out as "real life" took over again. this is a hobby. people drop out all the time and it has nothing to do with you.

people outgrowing your story: now, if they are still in fandom but have dropped out of your story particularly, keep in mind that this is not necessarily negative. they might just have gotten all they needed for their own lives and minds, from your story. you satisfied them with ten chapters, and that's just it. they don't need to read more. there's no ill feelings about it, they just don't need the coping mechanism anymore, and that's alright. additionally, if you're posting for years, like me, people might just - be in a different stage of their lives. it's like: you know all those times when you've looked at your WIP and thought 'god, i'd rather be writing something else'? think of your readers as the same. sometimes, they're just not in the right mindset. sometimes, their interests shift. you, as the writer, can't indulge in that too much, because you need to finish (at least if you're as stubborn as me) but as a reader... it's so easy to drop something you're not in the mood for. they might come back at a later date. they might never come back at all. and again, because people join in doves, they usually drop out also in doves, because people evolve over a period of a year, two years, and might all reach a new life stage coincidentally at the same time.

but the thing that you really need to remember from that quote at the beginning is that last part: new people come in. because sure, some people do get "tired of your face" momentarily but that doesn't mean (and shouldn't be) your fic's death sentence. in my experience, that is very hard to see when you're at low tide (especially if it's your first low tide), but actually, just because some people drop out, doesn't mean that new people won't come in at a later date. to tell you the truth, i've now been writing my WIP for over three years and bar from one or two people, no one who is currently in my comment section was there from the start. people who were crucial to me developing some stuff in the fic have just dropped off the face of fandom altogether. there are a couple of people i talk to almost daily on discord who've dropped out of my WIP and i'm dying to ask them why, because it does kind of hurt, and i have turned it in my head over and over again, wondering where my writing stopped being enjoyable for them but to tell you the truth - that needs to remain their problem, not mine.

you can't be badgering people to read your fic. people only have limited leisure time in this world, and you don't own it. i know it can feel like you do sometimes, especially when you have a fic that grabs people and takes them into your world and you want to never let them go, but sometimes, you have to. and, you do just have to learn to deal with it.

one of the challenges of writing long fics is also learning to stay motivated, to surf that tidal wave, and accept that people just come and go, and take them as they are. i'm not going to tell you to write your story "for you" because i always think that's terrible advice and we don't write in a vacuum, but i do think you need to find something that keeps you going. for me, knowing about those waves and being able to talk myself out of it when my brain spirals really helps. and, maybe, talk about it with your fandom friends.

What's your advice if you're serially writing/posting a fic, and people who used to comment stop commenting, and also bookmarks decrease? I know no one is supposed to be doing it for the reception, but the reception is engaging/inspiring/motivating, and how do you help keep yourself on track/ true to your own story even if it seems to be veering out of popularity? obv the point is to stay true to your own vision, but sometimes it's hard not to get side tracked/influenced by others reactions. TY!

I had a situation similar to this once. In my case, I'd gone on hiatus for over a year and never stopped thinking about the fic, and I finally decided to just finish it.

I wrote and posted 6 chapters over 2 days and just posted as I went so that I could reach the end before anything could stop me. I got to the point where I just had to finish the story, and so I made sure I got it done before looking at the reaction to it.

You have no way of knowing whether the dip in response is because of the direction you took your story or your readers being made up largely of a group who are busier at this time of year. Trying to interpret that kind of thing is about as easy as looking into a crystal ball and reliably predicting the future.

If you love your story and you have an end point you're aiming for, focus on that. Stop posting it, if you want. That often makes it easier. Then you can just focus on your own vision and your own desired ending and it will be easier to stop second guessing and thinking about pleasing an audience who you don't know (and don't really know what they want).

Fic authors? How do you manage to move forward when you're in a situation like this? Have you got some ideas? And if you don't have any or if you're a reader, feel free to cheer anon on in the notes.

[tealeavesandthorns]

Shipping Q's -

what’s the best thing about shipping for you? 6. do you have any ship bias with your muse? 7. what do you think about OC x canon ships? would you play any?15. what’s your OTP when it comes to your muse? 20. is there a ship you wanted to play, but couldn’t yet? 23. have you ever been pushed to ship something? 27. did you ever play a wedding? 33. what’s the first ship you played? 38. how easily does your muse get crushes? 39. does your muse have a celebrity crush?

SHIPPING QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN - SFW EDITION!

what’s the best thing about shipping for you?

It's strange really, you'd think it would be the romance, hell you'd think I'd love romance novels and such but actually adventure is where my heart lies and movies it's always been about fantasy adventure. What I love about shipping though is the journey. I love the different ways people fall in love with each other and I've rped quite a lot of them. I love going into interactions adamant about not shipping and then it just happens naturally. I think all the ships I've loved the most though have been the unexpected ones, ones I never could have seen coming in a million years. I just love writing people falling in love, I don't know why. I suppose it's an adventure of it's own in a way. Also at heart I'm a real big believer in the love conquers all thing.

6. do you have any ship bias with your muse?

TBH, I think with Maria it's absolutely one thing I've learnt not to have. She has certain tastes, and things she generally doesn't find attractive - like she'd never fall in love with anyone younger than her. But some of the ships she's had in the past have honestly just surprised me so much that I gave up any kind of bias pretty quickly I would say. I also feel with shipping it very much comes down to chemistry so there's no character (that fit her criteria) that I could see myself being like ABSOLUTELY NOT about. That being said Maria is definitely a lot more attracted to more dominant/domineering male characters. If they have the energy that they could take charge she'll be doing the 0.0 eyes.

7. what do you think about OC x canon ships? would you play any?

I play an OC so it would be pretty strange of me not to play them! I adore OC x Canon ships though and I've always written/read fanfic of them.

15. what’s your OTP when it comes to your muse?

God I have several. Multiship means they all have their own verses and such so it makes the OTP thing a bit less complicated. That being said here are some of my favourite ships pre 2017, that I wrote for Maria (half of these blogs are deleted/inactive now - with the exception of admiralchristopherpike). Maria x Pike (AOS) - Maria x Spock (AOS) - Maria x Bones (AOS) - Maria x Scotty (AOS) - Maria x Jim Gordon (Nolan) - Maria x Alfred (Gotham) - Maria x Andy Bernard (The Office) - Maria x Sherlock (BBC) - Maria x Bruce Banner (MCU) - There was also a gorgeous OC called Sam and that was an adorable ship but I forget the full name!

20. is there a ship you wanted to play, but couldn’t yet?

I've written a lot of fanfic in my days and generally speaking, I've tended towards pairing Maria with obscure characters or characters who rarely seemed to get RP'd so I often just write the fanfic. There are ships that I ponder on, that seem like they could be fun for Maria but honestly in the end it all comes down to chemistry and portrayal.

23. have you ever been pushed to ship something?

Yes, twice - once on Maria the first time, I was so new to rping too I just sort of pushed past my own discomfort. Then once on Tauriel which I gave a hard pass too and was stalked b/c of it. I may have had it on male muses once or twice but I don't really remember.

27. did you ever play a wedding?

Yes a few times actually! Pike and Maria, pretty sure Bruce and Maria were married, pretty sure Andy and Maria were definitely married. Then Briar and Scotty got married which was adorable, we turned that into like an event for our little rp circle.

33. what’s the first ship you played?

The timelines getting a bit jumbled in my head and I know that before this there were a few because I think I was part of a OUAT rp group but the first real one I think was Maria x Bruce Banner.

38. how easily does your muse get crushes?

Stupidly easily, if something even resembles a meet cute she's probably crushing. If someone just says something that catches her attention the right way and makes her look at them in a certain light, she'll catch a crush.

39. does your muse have a celebrity crush?

Alan Grant from Jurassic Park - the movie - so I suppose Sam Neill. Also though Jim Dale from the Carry On Films, Harrison Ford, Cary Grant, Gene Kelly, Sean Connery (The Rock/Entrapment/LoXG) and of course Colin Firth!

[panic-in-the-multiverse]

Jack Russell adopting a child

Pairings: Jack Russell x gn!child!reader

Imagine: Jack Russell finds a child and he decides to take care of the child

Warnings: mention of child abandonment, mention of injuries and blood, mention of werewolf and full moons, Jack Russell fluff, I think that’s it

A/N okay I love Jack, I do, and I saw like no fanfics of him so I’m here to do that, there will be more coming soon

Secondly I recently learned that Jack is actually a dad in the comics, I think when I read up on it he had a foster child (correct me if I’m wrong), anyway as I haven’t read any comics with Jack I just wanted to make it clear that this is based on the movie Werewolf by Night by Marvel

Okay so he found you in the woods when you were around two-three, no parents or even an animal was nearby, only him and you

He could smell your sent clearly, you were not a threat in any way

Being the kind man that he is he picked you up and brought you to his camp, where Ted resided as well, and he was very curious as to who you were, but so was Jack

Having forgotten earlier he checked if you had any kind of note with you but nothing existed except for a stuffed animal that you held in a tight grip

It seemed like your parents had abandoned you

that’s were it began

He thought that he’d only take care of you until he found a better place, bc he didn’t want to hurt you on full moons and he didn’t think it was safe to be near him, not for a child that is

but he never gave you away

the first words you said to him was something of the style of “Wolfee” or “puppy” maybe even “pup”, it had been the day after a full moon and you accidentally saw him transform as you had wandered out of the hideout he had placed you in for protection

The werewolf hadn’t hurt you in any way because Jack had lived with you for a while before the full moon and so had taken in your sent, and recognized it.

Jack would probably get a tad bit annoyed if you called him “puppy” because he isn’t a child but he lets you call him that nonetheless because it seems to make you happy, as every other nickname you have for him does too.

His nickname for you would probably be sunshine, or something like that because your the brightest thing in his life

It didn’t take too long for him to realize that you’d stolen his heart

Nor did it take long for him to give you your own comfy blanket and a stuffed animal (which is probably a wolf) to cuddle with

On Halloween you’d insist to go around as a werewolf or a wolf because you want to be like your dad, if you didn’t get to do that you wouldn’t dress up as anything at all

A lot of cuddles, like a lot

Matching sunflower mugs

Let’s not forget you gave him a “world’s best dad mug” or rather you didn’t buy one you took an old one that you had, and wrote with a marker on it, but Jack loves it anyway

He’d probably be protective because you don’t ever know what hunters would do to get to him

When it comes to protecting you he’d do anything

I imagine you’d get hurt a lot, having a lot of energy as a child and being out in the woods a lot, can lead to for example a lot of times tripping up and accidentally scraping your knee. But you have an awesome dad that patches you up

He and Ted would try to get you out of any trouble you ever got in, ultimately ending in Ted getting in trouble, leading to you and Jack having to save him, which leads to you and Ted saving Jack, it just goes around like that, obviously it doesn’t happen all the time, but it happens

You might of stolen his heart but he does know when to say no to you, especially when you want to do something dangerous

You tend to do the most adorable things and he can’t stop smiling when you do them

Did I mention cuddles

Plus saw a guitar at the end of the movie, at Ted’s and Jack’s camp so, I’m going to guess that he or Ted plays, and if he does he’d definitely teach you

With that you would also show him when you learnt something, making him proud of you for learning

Oh and Ted would definitely give you flowers

Idk what more, he’d be over the moon (pun not intended) the first time you called him dad

Just a cute little family of three

(Might add more later)

[myafterlifeisbetterthenyours]

I'm reading too many fanfics and today I want something more cute than romantic, so I would like Stella with an S/o to be her personal butler who took care of her during her childhood and adolescence (bonus if S/o used to sing to Stella when she was a kid) . obviously the S / o must have a great preparation to be worthy of taking care of the daughter of the parents who were certainly one of the causes of Stella to be like this

Stella's personal Servant and S/O

You had spent years in preparation for when you would meet your mistress.

It was a common practice amongst the nobility.

You take a child from a lower house, train and raising them to become the personal servant to a child from a higher noble family.

You were of lower stock, your family heavily reliant on Stella's family, and being the youngest of your line, you found yourself chosen to be her servant.

Although the agreement basically surrendered one of there own to a life of servitude, it also brought prestige to there household, while also placing one of there own at the right hand of the next head of a powerful household.

Despite your years of training, you were still increadibly nervous upon meeting her, terrified you'd do something wrong and screw it up.

But much to your surprise, she wasn't some terrifying ice queen who could vapourise you with a glare.

She was just a girl. A young, normal looking noble girl. Seemingly not much older than you.

Your meeting was somewhat awkward, you being unsure how you should interact with her outside of the cold formalities you were taught.

Your relationship was an unusual one.

As while, yes you were her servant, you were also expected to be her closest allie and truest friend.

You were expected to take on every burden she had, to carry and guard them to the death.

A concept that hadn't fully registered in your young mind yet, but despite your age, you quickly acclimated to your new responsibilities.

You had, of course, been give training for your new duty, but much of it was learnt in the field.

You found yourself working into a schedule; wake up before her, get clean, have breakfast before waking her up at 7:30 sharp.

From there you would help her dress, something you were quite flustered about the first time around. Then you accompanied her to breakfast, then to her first lesson of the day.

You were often dismissed during her lessons, returning to her room to tidy up, or have her clothes cleaned.

It took time but eventually you were just as capable at cleaning and serving as any veteran servant of the household.

Now, initially Stella was quite... cold towards you. Treating you not much better than any other servant of the home.

But she did eventually warm to you, starting the night you heard her having a nightmare.

Much to her annoyance you had been moved into the room besides her, giving her 24 hour access to you, and you to her.

So you were easily capable of hearing her toss and turn in bed, her whimpers getting louder and louder. Until she awoke, with a scream.

You instantly shot into action, sliding into her room and pulled her into your embrace.

Holding her to your chest, you did your best to sooth her. Barely being a boy yourself you were quite inexperience with such things.

So you did the only thing you could, you sang to her.

You sung her the song your wet nurse used to sing you when you had a bad dream. Holding her for what felt like hours, gently singing to her until she fell back to sleep.

The next morning she insisted you call her Stella, unlike before when she demand the customary 'Lady' or 'Mistress'.

Not long after that she began addressing you by name. The two of you seeming to enter a level of mutual respect.

Similar events would happen several more times during your youth, each time you sang her the same song, holding her close and soothing her.

You brought up the nightmares to her parents, the two seemingly didn't care. Her parents just coldlt telling you 'They were something she needed to get over herself.'

And her parents weren't the warmest family, both her parents seemed obsessed with there appearances, placing politics over the well bing of there own daughter.

So you made her well-being your top priority, always asking if she was OK or if she wanted to talk.

In preparation for you new duties you had already received extensive training in everything from cleaning to first aid.

But as the the two of you grew, you began getting lessons in far more hands on fields.

As you were expected to be her faithful guardian. You were trained in various forms of combat, with everything from knives, to assault rifles.

Followed by several specialised first aid courses, each one dedicated to a different field of medicine.

You excelled through each course, taking the role as both servant and protector as your own.

Despite being younger then your charge, your mentality quickly matured beyond your years, willing and prepared to fight to the death for your charge.

You fully embraced you postion, putting aside everything you were and giving yourself to your new role, absolutely.

As the two of you grew older, you also grew closer and closer. And due to your special status as her personal servant, having less limitations put on you then a regular servant of the house, you could act as more of a friend to the girl. Acting as a trusted confidant for the girls troubles.

As you matured your skills, both physically and mentally, you learned to better dedicat your new skills to what would most efficiently aid your liege.

While you excelled in your training dedicating your self to the task before you, the main problem you faced was, Stella.

It may seem petty, but Stella being of a higher and more powerful cast meant she grew to tower over you by at least a foot.

Something she was sure to rub in your face.

And it may not seem like that big of a deal, but protecting someone much taller then you, was a constant struggle. As they were far more visible then yourself and could be targeted from angles you weren't able to see.

But you did your absolute best, going above and beyond as her steadfast companion, hapily waiting on her hand a foot.

It seemed like a blink if an eye and the beautiful young lady you once served had grown into a beautiful young woman.

And much to your shame, over the years spent together, you had developed a deep affection for her, an affection that went far beyond friendship.

Of course you would never publicly admit such a thing, your years of training alloweing you to keep such your feelings suppressed. Only allowing your affection to show through in what would be expected of a typical platonic relationship.

When Stella came to the age of 17, her parents decided to send her to an academy famous for its education of young noble women.

The problem was, it was an all girls academy. And you being her private servant, and right hand, the two of you could not be sepperated for such a long period of time.

It took a fair bit of political manoeuvring and more then a few favours to get you in, but by the end of it, you found yourself enrolled right besides her.

You were to attend every class as well as share quarters with Stella. You were not to leave her side unless absolutely necessary.

You were far from the only servant to accompany there mistress.

You found a variety of them, from Imps to hellhounds. You even saw a few succubus amongst them.

But the thing that really stood out, was that you were the only male, even amongst the staff.

Initially life at the academy went fantastic.

Stella, with her confident nature and families status thrived at the academy, easily rising the social ranks, making friends and allies.

The whole thing bringing a great sense of warmth to your black heart.

You stood back and proudly watched as she excelled amongst her peers, only having to step in to aid her in her day to day.

But unfortunately, problems did arise. And much to your shame, they were spawned from you.

Now, you had already received a fair amount of attention from the Student; Stares, love letters, lustful gazes. But you were there for Stella, the affects of there attention quickly dissipated as you focused on Stella.

Now you being a fairly attractive young man, in exceptional shape from years of work and being the only male in a school of a few hundred young hormonal women.

But initially, being Stella's servant stopped anyone from pursuing you, as relations with someone below them was punished severely by both the school and there families.

Unfortunately the question of who you were was quickly raised, Stella without much concern or thought, told them all about your special status as both a noble and a servant.

And that's were the problems really began.

You see, sleeping with another family's servant, was an excellent way to get yourself disowned by your family.

But a fling with a servant, whom was also a fellow noble... that could be tolerated.

You were greatly surprised to find just how tolerant the school was of such behaviour.

It would seem that despite there rather strict policy on student/Staff relations, that being pubished severely.

But the school was unwilling to take serious action against noble children for have relations amongst themselves.

It seemed they allowed the students to let out there rebellious phase in small ways, perhaps a method to help make them into proper nobles.

Needless to say, you had never been so happy you were Stella's servant.

You'd heard how some of them talked about you, and if Stella wasn't your mistress, your quite certain you'd be used as a tool for political gain, regardless how you felt about it.

Ironically, you found Stella becoming far more possessive of you, especially whenever someone began to show interest in you.

Now she had always been possessive of you to a degree, snapping at anyone who dared to treat you poorly or acted like you were supposed to serve them, something that happened quite often amongst nobility.

You liked to think it was her way of marking her territory, all the while showing you that she had your back. And with all the attention you were getting, it only made sense for her to be a bit more possessive.

Adding to your growing shame, seeing Stella becoming such a strong, confident woman had only strengthened your feelings for her.

In your mind, you had kept your feeling for Stella perfectly hidden. Only allowing your affection to show, through your friendly and platonic behaviour.

Apparently you were wrong.

Parties were surprisingly common on the school grounds, with a major party seemingly occurring at least once a month.

Stella being ever the socialite, was of course invited. The young lady flirtaciously telling you were invited as well. Following her to the party, you found a small herd of teens sipping wine from plastic cups, talking amongst themselves.

Playing nobility.

It was fun for the most part.

Everyone was dancing and drinking. And much to your surprise Stella was quite lax when it came to alcohol, drinking more than her fair share.

A little tipsy, she found you, demanding you dance with her.

Now you, on the other hand, did not party. You did not drink, you did not fraternise and you most certainly didn't dance.

You were her guardian, you were supposed to watch over her, not get drunk with her in some random dormroom.

But Stella ordered you, not having the will to refuse her, you complied.

You danced and drank and partied. And for the first time in your life, you let yourself he a teenager.

And you enjoyed it. You enjoyed being with Stella.

The mood quickly soured when, as Stella left to get a drink, some random girl grabbed you by the collar and rather aggressively tried to kiss you.

You were able to hold her back of course, even inebriated you were still strong enough to hold back a drunk teenage girl.

You were freaking out, unable to think of what to do, only for Stella to appear and violently rip her off you, beating the crap out of the her right there infront of all the other party goers.

She screamed at the girl, telling her to never touch what belonged to her again. Before without saying a word, grabbing your hand and dragging you out of the party.

She dragged you into a nearby allyway, ranting and raving about how dare someone touch you, you belonged to her and she was sick of having to remind people.

Her words becoming progressively more possessive, you just half drunkenly stumbling your much taller mistress.

Raising the question of her increasingly possessive language, you saw her entire body shift.

Walking up to you, she pressed her body up against yours, effortlessly pinning you to the wall.

It was pointless to struggle, as even with all your training she was still stronger.

With eyes you had never seen before, she stared into your own and asked if you liked her.

You were both shocked and terrified, you were so sure you had been careful.

You sputtered something out, trying to hide your feelings before she cut you off with a passionate kiss.

She held you close as she told you all about how she knew you liked her, about how she knew you always held yourself back.

But she understood why.

You were left stunned when she told you the reason she knew why, was because she'd been doing the same. She confessed she had fallen for you, but like you, she had kept her feeling secret because such a relationshi wouldn't be "proper"!

But she didn't care anymore.

She was sick of keeping her feelings for you a secret, sick of watching other women get to speak and act freely while she was forced to hold her tongue.

She wanted you and she was going to have you, no matter what anyone thought.

She dragged you back to your dormroom, although it was more like a small apartment before dragging you to her bed.

Sitting above you she asked if you wanted this, unable to think of the right words you just gave her another passionate kiss.

The two of you spent the night together.

Your relationship was kept a secret for the rest of her time in the academy. The two of you agreeing it would be best and with Your position already giving you the best possible excuse to be close together.

Once you both graduated, Stella's parents tried to have an arranged marriage set up for her, hoping to achieve greater prestige for the family.

But much to your surprise, she blatantly refused.

Instead she using her new-found political connections and usurped her parents, taking the family name and the role of head of household as her own.

Her first act, openly declaring your relationship.

You were deeply relieved the outcry was very minimal, contained to only a few already outspoke critics that apposing her anyways.

And so you stood by her ever since. As bother her loyal protector and faithful lover.

Hey hey, this one was a challenge, but I still enjoyed it. If any of you have a request or want to submit a prompt, go right ahead. Check out my master list for what I won't write and go for it. Thank you all for reading.

[everlasting-elegy]

Heya! I've been having another Solomon brainrot after Our Destiny was released and I saw your post so I wanted to share some (probably cliché) thoughts too. I hope you don't mind! ^^

Ok first off— KAWATA-SAN'S VOICE IS AMAZING AND ADDICTING AS ALWAYS

I definitely had high hopes for his character song especially with his catchy, educational fish songs and his cover of Sinful Indulgence but it still surpassed my expectations—

The harmonization is so mesmerizing and the humming and ad-libbing at the end? *chef's kiss*

Some lyric videos have now been posted too and the lyrics are so sweet! (Here are some by Akuma Ai and kreanime just in case)

Now about Solomon himself

**some S3 (Lessons 41-60) spoilers ahead, sorry**

A lot of people see Solomon as a shady character but personally, I think he's really sweet. Sure, there are times when he deceives you for the sake of teaching you as well but he's seen a lot in his time.

With the MC's total faith in others being their greatest virtue and weakness, I think he also wanted to teach them not to trust people too easily, let alone demons. In the 3rd part of his birthday card (Seek a Melody), he mentioned that being in a pact with a demon doesn't make them your friend and each party has its own separate interests. But also thanks to the MC, he eventually started seeing them as good friends and the MC taught him some things about demons that he hadn't known despite having lived for so long.

Solomon didn't really have any close friends except for Asmo and eventually, Simeon, Luke and the MC.

Maybe I've been influenced by a few posts and fanfics here and there but I think he was a bit insecure about having a relationship with the MC especially since they're usually around the demon brothers and they barely get to spend any time together (until S3) and he'd accept the fact that his feelings may be unrequited.

After being alone for so long, he has someone to value again, to love again and this time, he has a chance to deepen their connection which is why he won't ever let them go.

(Anyway yeah sorry for the long ramble and feel free to ignore this. Please have mercy, I am but a lowly Solomon simp— /hj)

I’m so glad to see I’m not the only one being converted because of Our Destiny and of course I don’t mind!! I especially asked for some Solomon thoughts so these thoughts are very welcome~

My day’s been made a little brighter knowing that Solomon’s VA makes educational fish videos I can’t stop giggling its so cute skdkskd. I didn’t know he covered Sinful Indulgence though!! Kawata’s voice is honestly perfect for Solomon, it’s smooth and calming yet slightly airy with mischievousness~

I am FULLY with the “Solomon’s just some dude” agenda lmao. Yeah this man is a powerful sorcerer on the prowl for pacts but honestly if I was him I would be too skdjskd (also he has 70? or so pacts and for someone alive for presumably thousands of years thats a pretty low rate). He likely learnt the hard way of the contractual relationship of a pact, poor man ends up keeping a lot of beings at arms length. But for you, the one he’s ironically learnt so much from, he’ll teach you all he knows in return

PLEASE after the first time I came across the “Solomon concerned that MC would never love him back because he’s just a human and there’s literally all powerful demons down bad for them” I read nothing but Solomon fics for the next week. Unrequited love that is actually returned is just SO JUICY I’ve been itching to write a fic on it skdjskdjs. I guess some could argue that its not logical given Solomon could be just as powerful - if not more - than quite a few demons but in turn I’d argue that insecurities are usually not - if not ever - rational. It has been centuries, likely millenia, since Solomon has felt this way for someone, he can’t bear the thought of giving it up. Even if you don’t feel the same, he’ll be by your side, doing all he can to keep you safe and to see you smile at him

(Please do not fear about being a “lowly Solomon simp”, at this rate I’m going to be joining you in the depths skdjskd)

[myrandomfandomramblings]

The Beach - a The Rookie/Chenford Fanfic

“7-Adam-11, show us responding,” Jackson said over the radio as Lucy leaned back against her headrest defeatedly.

“I didn’t think I’d ever say this but I really don’t want to go to the beach.” “Like ever again,” she added even as she took the first turn towards their destination. 

LA was 4 days into a record heat wave and over that time Lucy had learnt a few important things 1) Unsurprisingly, extreme heat causes everyone to flock to the ocean. 2) It also makes people extremely irritable. 3) Lots of irritable people packed together in large groups leads to chaos and 4) wool uniforms are not ideal attire for patrolling beaches in temperatures around 100. 

So after 4 days she was over it. She had spent Monday with Jackson getting sworn at, honked at and nearly run over as they directed traffic at the busiest beaches in the city. She spent Tuesday with Tim breaking up beach brawls, confiscating contributing alcohol and watching bikini clad woman flirt with Tim. At least 8 different woman had asked him to rub sunscreen on them or suggested he take off his shirt to cool down. She had rolled her eyes so much she had given herself a headache. Although it may have been the sun. Yesterday, her and Nolan and responded to a report of a missing child who was feared drowned or kidnapped but turned out had followed the music of an ice cream truck four blocks and was found, about 30 minutes after the officers arrived, happily eating a fudgiscle. However, they were kept at the beach for the remainder of their shift by various citizens with complaints ranging from seagulls, wasps and possible sharks to thieves, streakers and possible melanoma. 

Now her and Jackson were headed back to a beach where the adjacent shrubbery was currently being consumed by a blazing bush fire, which was in all likelihood human caused and spreading fast. Therefore all hands were on deck as the LAPD worked with the LAFD to keep civilians safe, extinguish the fire and investigate its cause.

The rest of her shift passed in a blur as they interviewed witnesses, cordoned off the area, issued evacuation orders, ensured those who needed it got medical attention, joined a production line passing large buckets of water from the ocean to where the fire was burning and debriefed with their team which included Nolan and Tim, and Lopez and Harper. Luckily in the end, the fire was successfully extinguished, those living nearby were safe and happily back in their homes and the perpetrator, a cigarette butt flicker, was caught. But not until nearly 11pm by which time the entire team was exhausted, scorching and covered in soot and ash. With their job done the team of 6 headed away from the scene back along the beach to where they had parked their shops. They were right on the sand where they left them to create a barrier preventing people from wandering toward the fire and the beach around them was abandoned. Likely due to a combination of the late hour, the fire itself and the fact that the stretch of beach they were on was only accessible by walking about a mile from one of the main beaches on either side or by scrambling down the steep cliff behind them.

“Anybody want a cold one,” Nolan asked when they reached the vehicles, “well a hot one I guess” he amended as he pulled out a six pack he had confiscated earlier in the day from the trunk of his shop. Everybody made a face at the offer of hot beer but since the only light around came from the shops headlights shining in the opposite direction Nolan didn’t see them.

“Screw it, I’ll take one,” Angela said.

“Wesley and Patrice took the baby to meet the extended Evers clan so I have nowhere to be and now that I’m no longer breastfeeding I can have whatever I want. Even if that’s gross beer that’s been sitting in a hot car all day,” she explained.

“If we dig a hole near the water line it will fill with cold seawater and we can make a makeshift beer fridge,” Jackson suggested but Angela had already opened her can and was sipping away.

“I’ll help dig the hole,” Nyla offered. “I’d rather hangout here then go back to the station to do paperwork and Lila’s with her dad so I also have no where I have to be.”

“I’ll call Grey and tell him we’re clocking out and will do the paperwork in the morning,” Tim offered.

“Your staying?” Lucy asked a little too excitedly, “what about Kojo?” she quickly added.

“Tamara called several hours ago and offered to give him dinner, take him for a walk and put him to bed.”“She saw the fire on the news and rightly assumed we’d have our hands full,” he finished.

30 minutes later they all sat in the sand around their makeshift beer fridge. Shoes, socks and button up shirts discarded and pants pulled up to their knees. 3 flashlights were in the middle of the group, pointing skyward, their handles buried in the sand. They laughed as they went around and told stories.

“How is it still this hot?” Lucy asked a while later.  It was after midnight and the temperature had yet to even consider dropping below 90. 

She pulled her white t-shirt away from her skin fanning, herself. 

“I’m going swimming,” she declared ready to stand up.

“Your going swimming? Right Now? In that?” Tim asked gesturing to her cotton tee and woolen pants.

Lucy shook her head. “I was just going to go in my underwear but now that I think about it I don’t really want to have to drive back to the station in soaking wet underwear.”

Tim nodded as if this is what he expected but Lucy didn’t see him and continued.

“I guess I’ll just skinny dip,” she concluded.

Tim managed to both spit out and choke on the sip of beer he had just taken.

Everybody else’s faces were turned towards Tim and wearing amused expressions but they were saved his annoyance due to the limited light and the fact that his attention was still fully on Lucy.

“What?” She asked Tim, “It’s not a big deal. It’s dark. Plus everybody here has already seen me naked.” 

“Well except you,” she added, which earned another spit take from Tim.

Lucy rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile. She loved seeing Tim flustered, especially when it was her doing.

“What?” He finally managed to ask in a strained voice after a few harsh coughs to clear his throat.

“Everybody here’s seen Lucy naked but you,” Lopez offered, “although that was bound to change sometime soon,” she added.

Lucy and Tim both turned to look at her wide eyed. Nolan and Nyla were both hiding smirks and Jackson wore an expression of mainly panic as he spoke.

“She’s drunk. She has no idea what she’s saying,” Jackson offered before turning to look daggers at Angela and whisper something in her ear.

Lucy thought she heard the words bet, interference and disqualified but she couldn’t be sure.

When he finished Angela addressed them again. “Sorry, apparently my tolerance took a nose dive since pre-pregnancy. I didn’t mean anything by that I got you mixed up with Smitty and what’s her face,” she finished waving her hand disparagingly.

“Hmm,” Lucy said clearly not buying her lame excuse but Tim still had his mind on other things.

“Why has everybody else here seen you naked?” he asked, his tone almost suspicious.

Lucy laughed. “Are you jealous?”

He fixed her with his best TO look. “No.”

Lucy suppressed the urge to roll her eyes yet again and answered.

“Communal showers at work,” she began gesturing to Nyla and Angela. “Best friends and roommates” she added pointing to Jackson. “Life gets crazy. Sometimes closing doors or throwing on clothes just isn’t a priority,” she explained seeing Tim’s confused expression. “Also we had to help each other into and out of the bath after we were injured.” She didn’t have to specify her kidnapping or the beating Jackson took to take down Doug Stanton. This group knew. “It’s kind of ironic that when everything hurts all you want is a warm bath but when everything hurts it’s nearly impossible to get yourself into and out of a bathtub,” she finishes. “Oh and Nolan and I used to date.” She says it as almost an afterthought, super casual. But all the former TOs still look at her with shock.

“You and Nolan?” Nyla asks with a laugh. “Really?” “No offense,” she adds addressing Nolan.

“Ah, none taken?” Nolan replies, clearly confused by her reaction.

“When?” Lopez asks looking between the two P2s.

“For a couple months while we were in the academy. We called it off shortly after we started at Mid-Wilshire,” Nolan supplied.

“Wow, I just can’t picture it,” Angela continued shaking her head.

“Why would you want to picture it?” Tim spat. Then seemed to catch himself and schooled his scowl back into a blank expression.

“Why’d you call it off, anyway?” Angela asked. Half actually curious. Half just trying to do her friend a solid and take the attention off him.

“Bishop warned me that dating a fellow cop would brand me and could ruin my career,” Lucy answered and thought she saw Tim flinch. It was impossible to tell for sure with just the flashlights, nevertheless she added, “Somethings matter more-“ she was staring right at Tim now “-are worth the gossip, the assumptions, the risk.” As she said it she saw his expression change but she couldn’t read it. “But our relationship wasn’t one of those things. We’re better as friends, anyway,” she finished addressing the whole group but looking at Nolan specifically for confirmation.

“Agreed,” Nolan nodded holding up his beer.

“To friends,” Jackson said clicking his to Nolan’s.

“To friends,” everybody joined in clinking their cans together.

“So who’s coming skinny dipping with me?” Lucy asked as she started to make her way back to the vehicles where she could leave her clothes in a place where they’d stay sand free.

“I will,” said Angela, “pregnancy and caring for a baby really makes modesty go out the window. The two beers I’ve had don’t hurt either.” She began to follow Lucy to the cars.

“I’m in,” Jackson offered, “with you two practically glowing in the dark nobody will even notice me.” He teased as he got up to join them, earning a playful shove from Lucy.

“Nobody’s here to see anything anyway.” She retorted.

“Go ahead. I might join you later.” Nolan said and Nyla and Tim nodded in agreement.

10 minutes later. Lucy, Angela and Jackson’s clothes were inside Jackson and Lucy’s shop and they were out in the ocean. It dropped off quickly so they weren’t that far away from the beach even though the water came to just below Lucy’s shoulders. After four days of blazing heat and the fire on top today, the cool water felt like heaven to her. She dipped and dove through the water, relishing the cool and wiped at her face and hands to remove the soot that had coated them earlier. Beside her Angela was trying to show Jackson what her son does when they put him in the water. This led to reminiscing about childhood summers spent at the beach or in backyard and community pools. And before they knew it they were playing old games from those days. John and Nyla had joined them by this time. Claiming some combination of escaping the heat, joining the fun and more beer as the motivation. They were currently having breath holding contests.

“I win!” Jackson exclaimed as he came up for air to find everyone else already up.

“You cheated,” Lucy argued, “I saw you come up while I was still under. I had my eyes open.”

“I did not. Plus it’s pitch black under there you couldn’t possibly have seen anything.”

“Did Jackson come up?” Lucy yelled at Tim who was still sitting on the shore.

“I don’t know. I wasn’t watching,” he replied casually with a slight shrug.

“Yes you were,” Angela argued, “you haven’t taken your eyes off Lucy since she got in here,” then realizing what she said she quickly ducked back under the water. 

Everybody still above the surface froze.

Then after a beat. “So did he come up or not. I need to know if I won,” Nyla asked, all business.

“He floated to the surface but didn’t lift his head up. He won,” Tim offered defeatedly.

“Told you!” Jackson bragged.

“Rematch. 3,2,1 go,” shouted Nyla as everybody ducked back under the water. Lucy a split second behind everybody else as her attention was still on Tim. 

She came up about 30 seconds later just as a wave was passing by her and managed to swallow a good serving of water. She coughed and sputtered but before she knew it Jackson and Nolan were beside her and she was assuring them she was Ok just needed a bit of time to catch her breath. As she swam towards the shore to rest in the shallows she noticed Tim was just sitting back down and his pants were wet to just above the knee. But she didn’t let herself focus on it.

She swam to just in front of where he sat laying on her stomach on the ocean floor, head just above the water.

“You OK?” He asked shifting his eyes to her for the first time since she swam up.

“Ya fine, just swallowed a little water,” she assured him.

“Looks like you guys are having fun out there,” he nodded indicating the group still farther out.

“Ya the water feels amazing. You can’t honestly tell me that you aren’t hot.” She had meant it literally. He was sitting in above 90 degree weather with wool pants on. But then she realized he had taken off his white shirt and his muscled chest and stomach were currently on full display and the word took on an entirely different meaning. She was thankful for the darkness as it hid her blush but even that couldn’t hide the fact that she was definitely staring. 

“The ladies on the beach the other day will be so disappointed they’re missing this,” she teased gesturing to his bare upper half, hoping to give a probable explanation for the staring.

He gave a short laugh. “Not as disappointed as the meat bags who were wolf whistling at you will be that they’re missing that.” As he gestured at her he finally let himself actually take her in. Her hair was still up in its low work bun leaving her entire back exposed. The upper half of which was completely taken up by a tattoo, he had never seen before, although the light was too limited for him to make out the design. The rest of her body was hidden in shadows except her face which was now free of soot and make-up making her look young and vulnerable. Freckles brought out by the last few days of blazing sun were speckled across the bridge of her nose. Her mouth was twisted in thought and her eyes sparkled in the light of the flashlights. She really was beautiful.

While those thoughts flew through Tim’s mind Lucy was thinking about his comment about the wolf whistlers. That had happened at the very start of their shift and lasted no more than two seconds. Lucy wasn’t even sure they had been whistling at her and she had completely forgotten about it until Tim brought it up just now. Funny that he would remember. 

 They were both pulled out of their thoughts by a sudden commotion further out in the water:

“DID YOU NOT THERE IS NO PIE!”

“DO NOT THERE IS NO DIE!”

“DO OR DO NOT THERE IS NO TRY!”

Were being yelled over each other.

“What are they doing?” Tim asked looking at the group out in the water.

They were in a circle. Jackson had just given Nolan a high five then they were under again.

“I think they are playing the guess what I said under the water game,” Lucy chuckled.

Tim was about to reply but he was cut off by “How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood” being shouted in unison followed by bickering about who said it first.

“I’m going back out to join them. You going to come?” Lucy asked turning her attention from the group back to Tim.

“I don’t need to be a part of that.”

“Come on Tim. You’re hot and dirty.” She still meant it literally. Really. He was covered in soot. Stupid double entendres.

He raised is eyebrows.

“Just get in the water,” Lucy said splashing water at him to vent her frustration with how flustered she was getting.

He wiped the water from his face and a small smile appeared at the corner of his mouth. “Fine.”

Lucy beamed back at him as he stood up and walked back to the shop to discard his remaining clothes then turned her attention back to her friends.

“It’s not Angeles Direct, you’ve already guessed that three times,” Nyla was saying to Jackson

“That’s what it sounds like,” he argued “and it’s definitely closer to that than ‘embroidery period.’”

“That was my first guess. I heard wrong,” Nyla shot back.

“Oh ya cuz ‘and was dressed’ and ‘indoors divest’ were so much closer.”

Any further argument was cut-off by Nolan. “I’ve got it: Angela’s the best,” he said confidently.

“Yes and yes,” Angela confirmed.

“Your turn Nyla.” 

There was a brief silence as they all went back under the water followed by a flurry of screamed “this is stupid.”

“Happy now?” Came a quieter voice beside her and Lucy nearly jumped out of the water. She had been so wrapped up watching her friends she hadn’t even noticed that Tim had made his way back down the beach and was now sitting beside her in the water.

She smiled and nodded. “Aren’t you?”

He gave a non-committal shrug. “We’ll see after I get roped into whatever’s going on out there,” he offered but there was no bite to it. He was even smiling, although mostly with his eyes, as he looked at their friends.

“Well let’s go find out,” Lucy replied as she led the way into the deeper water.

As they approached the group they watched them go up and down and listened to their guesses.

“And further than game”

“Comforters at game”

“Temperatures endgame”

“Stanford is endgame”

“Checkers is a game.” “At least that’s a real sentence”

“Bradford has game?” “That can’t be right he most definitely doesn’t”

Then just as Tim and Lucy joined the group “Chenford is endgame!” Shouted by Angela who upon realizing Tim and Lucy had joined them turned to Jackson.

“This ones not on me it was your sentence.”

Jackson stood stunned for a second looking desperately between Tim, Lucy and Angela then swiftly closed his eyes and yelled “MARCO.”

There was a brief silence then Nolan yelled “POLO” and everyone was swimming away from Jackson at top speed. Everyone except Tim who was giving Lucy a look that said. “See what you got me into? I told you so.” 

But she was busy swimming off with the others, grateful for the distraction. So he rolled his eyes and joined the game. The water did feel amazing although he wasn’t about to admit that to her.

Calls of MARCO POLO and laughter filled the air as everybody took their turn being it: Jackson tagged Nolan who tagged Lucy who tagged Nyla who tagged Jackson who tagged Tim who tagged Nolan who tagged Angela who tagged Jackson who tagged Tim who tagged Lucy. Well he meant to tag Lucy. He reached his arm out and jumped towards her “POLO” but she was closer than he thought and instead of the tips of his finger tagging her shoulder he jumped right into her. He hit her hard and she responded to being knocked off her feet and down into the water instinctively by reaching for the nearest thing to prevent drowning, which happened to be him. So when he opened his eyes her arms were around his neck and her legs around his hips and her face was only about an inch from his own as she coughed up water for the second time that day.

“Are you ok?” He asked moving a piece of hair that had fallen into her face behind her ear.

She nodded but continued to cough as he absentmindedly stroked her back.

 “You caught me by surprise,” she breathed “I didn’t know we were playing full contact Marco Polo.”

He let out a relieved laugh, “I’m sorry.”

“A real Tim Bradford apology I never thought I’d see it in person,” Lucy teased earning an eye roll from Tim. This close Lucy could see all the different shades of blue in his eyes even in the dark. 

“It was an accident.”

“So it wasn’t some sort of Tim Test to see how I would handle a fight in the water?”

“No. You got your last Tim test a year ago when you stopped being my rookie.”

“I can’t believe it’s been a year already,” she said. “Then again we’ve been through enough for an entire career,” she added as her hand reflexively moved from his neck where it was playing with his hair to the tattoo on her her ribs.

That’s when it dawned on her just how close her and Tim were, pressed together without a shred of clothing between them. She had felt so comfortable and content she hadn’t realized the gravity of the situation and what it could lead to. She was about to put some space between them when his hand covered hers over the tattoo marking her supposed day of death. The day he saved her from being buried alive. Although he would say it marked the first day of the rest of her life. The day she saved herself. 

And the desire to move away died in an instant. 

“I kept it,” she said quietly, “because of what you said.” “Because it’s a reminder that I’m a survivor. And that my team will always have my back.”

Tim was looking at her with an expression more open than she’d ever seen. “I have one of those,” he replied softly lifting her hand up and moving it to rest on his lower left abdomen. She was confused at first but as she felt the skin beneath her finger tips she realized it was scarred. The scar from when he was shot on her second day and she pulled him out of the line of gunfire.

She smiled and looked directly into his eyes. 

“It’s a good thing we have each other in our lives,”

“Sure is,”

She was just about to lean in and close the distance between them when a voice interrupted.

“Hey you two. Keep it PG or get a room. This is a family outing.” It was Nyla.

Lucy laughed as she untangled her self from Tim and in that moment she realized two things. 1) this was most definitely her family and 2) she would very happily come back to the beach. Maybe next time she’d just bring Tim, maybe even as her boyfriend.

[midethefangirl]

Captain America: Civil War - My Thoughts

I know this is like 5 years late but for this, I’d like to resurrect a barely dead discourse that succeeded in not just dividing the Avengers but also dividing the fandom. Before we start, content warning for spoilers and let’s dive into this mess.

So, basically, the entire conflict of civil war stemmed from General Thaddeus Ross (who is a hypocritical dick, btw) coming to lecture the Avengers on being destructive despite conducting destructive experiments (ahem, the Abomination and the Hulk) but I digress. Then, Ross presents the Sokovian Accords which is really lengthy and we see Steve reading like a few chapters(?). Now, let us note that the Accords were presented to the Avengers after a mission-gone-wrong killed about 11 people in Lagos (lay-gos, not lah-gos that pronunciation gave me headaches as a Nigerian).

So, the Sokovian Accords were written by 117 countries and vetted by the UN asking for the Avengers to be under oversight (which SHIELD would have done if HYDRA hadn’t infiltrated it in the first place but it is what it is). Somehow, Steve made it about “our right to choose” (how?! Cause I’m not understanding) and decided to not sign*.

*he later got back to sign, then backed out when he learnt that Tony had placed Wanda under house arrest (even though it was for her protection. I do believe Tony should have fully informed Wanda about keeping her in the Avengers’ Tower)

My issues with the plot of Civil War are:

1. The Sokovian Accords were not read out loud or placed on some kind of PowerPoint slide for the audience to understand why Team Cap is against the Accords. No, the fandom wiki is not a source because that one is from Agents of SHIELD and not a lot of MCU fans are familiar with that show (yours sincerely included). Assuming the contents were read out loud or discussed by the Avengers, I’d have understood why Team Cap refused to sign the accords but since none of that was given, I’d remain Team Iron Man for this one.

2. The Sokovian Accords is not the American Constitution. Then again, the MCU fandom tends to be American-centric and most Americans seem to have this belief that the world revolves around them (and it manifests itself in Civil War discourse).

3. Contrary to popular opinion, the Sokovian Accords were about 117 (mostly third-world) countries asserting their sovereignty and boundaries, not taking away rights from the Avengers. If we go by what the MCU wiki claims about the accords, yes, some parts are absurd (like asking for blood samples and using trackers, why are those necessary?). However, when 117 countries state that they want you to respect their boundaries, I think it is best to comply. Unfortunately, respecting boundaries is one thing the USA has a problem complying with and guess who happens to represent America?

4. The Accords affected only their hero lives, not their lives as a civilian. I doubt the UN would limit the Avengers’ movements as civilians

5. Let us not forget how Steve and Clint protect Wanda from accountability and responsibility. Wanda in the MCU is like y/n in many fanfics where everyone (except for the “big bad villain” who in this case is Tony and 117 countries) seems to love her and want to protect her from facing the consequences of her actions. Anyone *ahem Tony* who has a bit of problem with her is suddenly the enemy. Not to mention how Wanda seems to have a knack for causing destruction in African countries (Johannesburg, Lagos, Wakanda)

6. And fandom behaviour from the Team Cap stans

7. Also, why is Civil War not an Avengers part 3? It’s better than making it a Captain America trilogy and then trying to frame Steve as being right.

8. I do believe that the accords were sped up which left little time for the Avengers to discuss and compromise on certain issues. If they were given more time to discuss, compromise and negotiate, I think the movie would have ended better than it had.

9. In addition, I also agree with Team Cap stans on how the UN arbitrarily deciding to shoot Bucky on sight is a human right violation.

10. “The safest hands are our own” why does this sound like a white saviour talk point from Steve? The accords is about 117 countries wanting you to respect their boundaries and the best you can come up with to refute that is saying something a white saviour would say?

11. “Even if the whole world is telling you to move...” just shut the fuck up, this is no way comparable to 117 countries trying to assert their sovereignty.

12. Look if I have to choose between surrendering a few rights as a hero and just dismissing that of civilians as potential damage, I’d go with the former because the people whom I’m suppose to protect come first. For me to dismiss their deaths as “we can’t save em all” is just not it.

13. “She’s just a kid”, a few years later and I still hate that term. One, it’s infantilizing an adult white woman (something white men have historically done and we all know how that went) . Two, while Tony was obviously wrong for not informing Wanda about her house arrest, he was right to keep her in the Tower when they were people who would harm her with every chance they could find. **

** after watching WandaVision, some people might find every reason to want to harm her.

14. Let us also discuss the motivation of those in Team Iron Man vs Team Cap

Team Iron Man

Tony: feels guilty for the events of Age of Ultron, believes that he’s stepped out of line and the Avengers need oversight.

Natasha: believes that the Avengers should listen to the public and the UN after all, if they had one hand on the wheel, they can still steer.

Vision: believes that the Avengers as a whole bring challenge which brings conflict and then catastrophe.

Rhodey: a soldier; believes in following orders especially when it is from the UN and 117 countries.

T’Challa: dude is just there to kill Bucky. I’m sure if Bucky was on team Ironman, my guy would have joined team cap, lmao 😂.

Spider-Man: not really there for a reason except to bring in Steve to Ross. I do agree that Tony shouldn’t have dragged him to the fight without Peter making an informed decision.

Team Cap

Steve: didn’t want to sign because it takes away his “right to choose”. Idk what that means or how it is relevant to the Sokovian Accords but okay. However, I understand his mistrust considering a few movies ago, we found out HYDRA had infiltrated SHIELD and as much as I believe governments are corrupt and the UN is shit, you cannot just enter a country anyhow without warning ahead of time.

Bucky: was his motivation given? I mean, I believe he joined Steve’s side to stop Zeno from unleashing the other winter soldiers. Not that that’s a bad reason, it isn’t.

Sam: again, I don’t think the movie gave us a reason for him being against the Accords. Did he also believe it was taking away his “right to choose”?

Wanda: undecided as of moment of discussion. Joined team cap because Tony placed her on house arrest. While I agree that Tony should have informed her that he was putting her under house arrest and stated the reasons why, I believe it was for good reasons especially when some people might decide to carry out witch hunts (you get it, witch hunts? 😅)

Clint: only joined because Wanda was placed under house arrest. We aren’t given any reason why he would oppose the Accords.

Scott: fan boy of Captain America, need I say more?

15. Also, to Team Cap stans blaming Tony Stark for Team Cap being imprisoned, grow the fuck up. The people in Team Cap are all adults who made their own decisions yet Tony is to blame for them breaking the law (because they did break the law), wtf.

16. “Are you capable of letting go of your ego for one damn second?” Like Steve’s ego didn’t play a part in all this too, lmao.

17. Okay, the final battle was intense and while I believe Bucky was also a victim, I can understand why Tony lashed out at him. The one to blame here is Steve because even if he had no clue Bucky was responsible for the Starks’ death, he still lied to Tony by not telling him who was responsible. It is more appalling to learn that Steve, in an attempt to “protect Tony and Bucky”, was actually covering for HYDRA!

Also, the way Steve stood emotionless while Tony watched a footage of his parents being killed. Yet, he could shield Wanda from watching the news because of how it affected her, okay.

“I can do this all day”, fuck you, Steve

18. Clint exploding at Tony is so fucking hilarious. Tony is right, Clint has a family yet he decided to fight in a war that didn’t concern him. Also, his comments about breaking backs is so tone deaf after Rhodey just broke his back!

19. If Sam was Captain America, I think Civil War wouldn’t have happened at all, from the dialogue in the Raft.

20. Overall, this movie is a fucking mess and I hate it for dividing both the Avengers and MCU fans.

Before I close with this, I want to add that I am not anti-Steve but Civil War really made me hate him. I get, Steve is supposed to be a Boy Scout and shit like that, but he’s a Gary Stu in the MCU, let’s be honest about it. Civil War should have been an Avengers movie, rather than a part of the Captain America trilogy. The Avengers should have been given more time than three days to discuss the Accords and make necessary amendments; after all that went down in Lagos, Wanda should have been made to sit out missions and maybe we could have had someone like Doctor Strange help in training her; Crossbones would have made a great villain but it is what it is; Peter’s introduction to the MCU could have been as him actually interning for the Stark Industries and forming a kind of acquaintance with Tony Stark before Tony finds out that he’s Spider-Man; Steve should have told Tony about HYDRA‘s hands in his parents’ deaths. Anyway, I’ll go read Civil War fix-it fanfics and fanfics where the Avengers are more like family. Fuck Civil War and I’m outta here.

Edit: okay this was a thought I had when I was trying to sleep but it was too good to ignore. Rhodey has a point about Steve arrogance (if that’s the correct term) in saying “the safest hands are our own” and here’s why:

Like he stated “this is not the World Security Council...neither is this SHIELD nor HYDRA” (paraphrased). This is the UN as well as 117 countries. Look, I am as anti-government as one can go and I don’t believe that the UN are reliable (plus, if we really want to go by the AoS version of the Accords, the Accords are flawed and they need amendments), however, given the US records on disrespecting boundaries in many third world countries, I can understand why 117 countries are wary about a bunch of superpowered Americans entering their country.

To us, the Avengers are saving the world. To these 117 countries and the people who have families who were killed in the crossfire (Zemo is a good example), the Avengers are a bunch of nuisances who leave destruction wherever they tread.

I am still neutral on the whole Accords as I don’t know exactly what it entails but for Steve to go “we are surrendering our rights to choose” (again, how is the Accords threatening the Avengers’ right to choose?) when asked to be under oversight is tone deaf.

[silvia7272]

Miraculess Ladybug Salt AU: You Always Liked To Play With Fire ~ The Meeting

I have no idea how long I want this to be, but I doubt it will be too long, so maaaaybe 15 chapters? But I’m super glad that this has gotten more attention than I thought it would have.

Might need to point out that I only said there weren’t any Miraculous here, but heroes still exist, but they all hide their identities (from the public because I think it’s stupid for random civilians to know your identity) if they chose to or they only tell families.

This fanfic and its ideas were all made before season 4 came out, so if something doesn’t add up please don’t worry. That information wasn’t available then, and unless it fits into my story or I like it, I won’t include it in my story. Also, that new Miraculous wiki can get lost, I’m not putting any of that new information in here if they couldn’t even put it in the show.

Word Count: 7661

Tags: @vixen-uchiha​, if you wish to be tagged all you must do is say. Also, if you change your name please tell me, I don’t want to leave you out since you’ve asked to be tagged. I’m very sorry if I’ve missed anyone.

Well, I hope you’ll enjoy it.

Summary:

(Fire doesn't exactly have anything to do with this story I just really liked the title)

Note: This book contains OOC scenes of Miraculous Ladybug as well as a ton of salt, so if you don't like that stuff you may scroll past and have a nice day.

In a world with no Miraculous, no Hawkmoth and no Ladybug, how does our little heroine do?

Well, it usually would be hanging out with her friends, as any other teenager would do...

But, of course, this wasn't normal.

This was reality. It was cold, hard, and definitely not welcome.

So, when this girl wishes to have some kind of adventure in her boring, mundane life...

How long does it take for her to regret it?

Trigger Warning (If you believe there is absolutely anything in my works that can be classed as triggering please tell me and I will include it after the summery. All off my works are made with a keep reading so you should be able to see if there's anything in the warning before hand.)

Mentions of guns, poison and stitching flesh.

***

Beep… Beep…

Alarms were annoying. Why had someone decided to invent a device that makes you feel guilty for sleeping in? Why not just be a gentle reminder in the form of a lullaby? Or a small caress of a hand brushing some hair, as you simply start to close your eyes, drifting of-

“Marinette you’ll be late for school again!”

She groaned.

So that was why.

Getting dressed she sighed knowing what the day would hold. Glares, being alone, eat, hopefully become nothing but invisible and make sure to go unnoticed before rushing back home.

For the past three years, this is what would happen to her. This same boring, frighteningly normal routine.

And she hated it.

Not just for being alone, or all of the sadness she felt grow each day to a meter she wasn’t sure what level she was on now but whatever. It wasn’t going down any time soon.

No, what she hated the most…

Was the boredom.

Yes, her creativity streak could not be higher, she had been going through her sketchbooks so much she had to work longer hours at her bakery to afford them all, but her love for fashion just wasn’t the same, she didn’t feel any joy producing her work anymore. There wasn’t anyone new to show it with.

She was just alone in her room, mountains of book piles covering every surface.

But she was bored in general. She wouldn’t be able to place the feeling, or even be able to describe what it was. But for whatever reason, she craved for adventure, I mean sure she was safe here, and she didn’t want to worry her Parents with this silly idea of hers. But she just wanted a tiny little taste of some venture.

So why couldn’t she?

“Did you hear?” Marinette heard the whispers, walking up to her classroom door she could hear what they were talking about, over the years she had become silent, become part of the crowd, it was so much easier to eavesdrop, although it was a bad habit of hers, she couldn’t help it.

For example, she heard about Adrien’s relationships.

Now don’t start getting worried, she was 100% over the boy. She would under no circumstances ever fall for someone like him, or even make such a god-like illusion of someone ever again.

But she heard how, the first day Lila came, and their kiss they shared. He really had meant to pull away.

Because he was starting to see Kagami.

But, his feelings became conflicted.

And he didn’t want to hurt Kagami, so he simply never told her.

But then he never told Lila to stop with all of her advances, and Alya had tried numerous times to set them up.

Again, Adrien never said for them to stop, instead went along with it. He never told them he was with Kagami, and Marinette couldn’t help but feel so sorry for the girl.

She learnt from hearing Adrien’s conversation he was her first friend, and she wanted to keep hold of that fact.

Just like her.

Except, the bluenette was able to escape that motion before she was sucked in too far.

She would’ve warned Kagami, don’t get her wrong. But Marinette wouldn’t lie. She was intimidated by the girl.

Every time she saw her, she would glare all the time. It just reminded her of everyone else, and she couldn’t go through with it.

Pathetic she thought bitterly.

But still. If she had confessed to Adrien, and then Lila came. Would he have told her about that kiss?

.

Well, er- Besides that, she had a knack for hearing other things too, for example, footsteps, she was able to tell who’s were who’s just by the sound. Some were light like Rose’s and Juleka’s. Some were heavy like Ivan’s and Mr Damocles. Some were sneaky like Chloé’s and Lila’s.

And she had to learn to avoid interactions with anyone she knew would make a fuss.

It became easy after a while.

Opening the door, she quickly scanned the class, they were all there, usual spots an all.

Around Lila’s desk.

Oh well.

It would be less likely they would notice her.

She was, fortunately, able to get to her seat without any interruptions.

“A hero is coming to Paris, to help all of the Parisians out. Isn’t that amazing?”

“Really, that’s so cool. I wonder what they’ll be like?”

“Oh, I sure hope he’s strong. Hey, do you think it’ll be Eostrix Or Sparrow?”

“And why exactly do you think it’ll be Eostrix? What about Medusa. Or-” Alya gasps, excitement seeping out of her.

“What if it’s Nebula?!”

“Nu-uh, it’s definitely Eostrix”

“No way Nebula all the way”

“Eostrix”

“Nebula”

“Eostrix!”

“Nebula!”

“EOSTRIX!”

“NEBULA!”

“BATMAN!!” The once quiet Rose belted out, before covering her hands in astonishment.

“Sorry I wanted to join in.” She gave a sheepish smile as Juleka pattered her head.

Marinette breathed a sigh of relief, they would always get loud but today must’ve been special.

She looked out the window. A superhero Ey? Coming to Paris? How exciting. She knew she would never get the chance to meet them in person, what with her not so chaotic schedule. But she would love nothing more than to thank them for all they had done, for even volunteering to come here and help.

If she was brave enough, she would love to bake something for them, as a token of appreciation for their work. Maybe even make an outfit inspired by them-

Wait- that wouldn’t be considered creepy, right?

She tried to work on that, with her attachment issues. But she was trying, with no friends at least, she wasn’t sure if it had worked. No one could see her progress without any other remarks.

“You shouldn’t work yourself up so much, besides there’s going to be an announcement in 2 hours, we’ll just see it at break.” Alix laid back in her seat, Marinette couldn’t tell if she had finally realised the truth but was just drowning it out or just grew bored.

But she hadn’t made any type of engagement with her.

Oh well, I guess she was done with hoping.

But it wouldn’t matter, Mlle Bustier came in clapping her hands to gain the classes attention.

“Now now, please return to your seats, I have a very special announcement to say” Please don’t let it be another pop quiz. It was bad enough when someone would glance her way in general. Not when her test score would be one of the highest.

“As you know, this small, lovely class has been so pleasant these past few years. Our own tight little nest, and I couldn’t be prouder of… All of you” Marinette saw the little glance she made, whatever she thought. It was all lies anyway.

“But, we will have to make another new addition to this class” A laugh was heard.

“Well, I for one hope they’ll be better than the last bunch… Except for you Adrikins” The others glared at her as Adrien looked away, not wanting to get involved.

If there was one thing Marinette could commend Chloé for, it was the fact she saw through Lila’s lies with ease. Having Sabrina by her side did make it easier, but she saw through none the less.

She didn’t care that everyone else believed her little tales, Chloé thought it was funny, and loved the idea of their reactions when they would inevitably freak out and cry.

She just had to be patient.

Plus, there was no way she would feel pity for Marinette. In this world, its use or be used. And like hell she’ll be used. She just had to see for herself.

“Chloé please, that’s no way to make a first impression. Ahem, excuse me, you may come in now!”

“Ok~,” A singsong voice said.

If Marinette had been paying attention, she would’ve noticed the newcomer walk in. She wore a long-sleeved unbuttoned cardigan with a t-shirt underneath and a knee-high length skirt. A scarf was tied around her neck, matching her attire and small petite shoes.

She would’ve noticed the pretty little bows in her hair. The pigtailed braids, all going down to her waist, showing off how long it still was even tied up. Little earrings so small worn, a detail many wouldn’t have noticed.

She would’ve noticed the little introduction she did to the whole class, and how it seems she brightened up the whole room. Or the smile she sent their way, not for one but for all. And how a blond boy blushed from it.

But more importantly, she would’ve noticed, or at least heard her name being called out multiple times.

“Marinette, please pay attention for once, I swear your behaviour has gotten worse” She wanted to shrink, now she made a fool out of herself in front of the new girl.

“I’m very sorry about that, that was very rude of her, I do hope you’ll forgive the situation, the only available seat is at the back” Great, now she will hate her.

“That’s alright, I love sitting at the back, that way, I can see everyone and know they’re ok” Hearts stopped, and smiles grew, she really was just a sweet little child.

The bluenette, however, was dreading it. Now there would be another to hate her. And she seemed so innocent. It was only a matter of time before she would be corrupted as well.

Oh, the horror, she really didn’t deserve it, but Lila would have her way, she always di-

“You’re Marinette, right?” She jumped, forgetting she had just been in her own little world again, staring off into space. She really needed to stop that.

“Err y-yeah, and you are?” She cursed herself for not paying attention, now she may just think she was an ignorant stupid-

“My name is Rosaniline Keyne-Hill, but everyone calls me Rosann, it’s a pleasure to meet you Mari” She giggled as Marinette stared back.

Mari? No one had called her that before. But she liked it.

“Yeah, same”

And it felt like something else.

Maybe… Hope?

…

She shouldn’t be so optimistic.

***

Trying to eat in peace was a nightmare. There weren’t many places where she could go to without being in trouble. The library prohibited any foods due to not wanting any books to be damaged, you weren’t allowed to eat in a classroom without a teacher present, and considering all of the teachers chose to eat in the staff room she wouldn’t be able to sneak into any room. The art club, again didn’t want to damage any works, not after Chloé “accidentally” spilt her drink all over Nathaniel’s sketchbook four years ago. He refused to go to school for a week. And the roof was out of the question, too unsafe and a risk if anything were to happen.

But Marinette, since it’s lunch, couldn’t you go eat at home? Why yes, she could, at least two times a week she would just go back and stay at home to eat, but she felt as if she couldn’t always retreat home just for convenience, besides, Mlle Bustier would sometimes tell her to eat in the cafeteria with the others instead of hiding herself away. If she tried going to her Parents when told to stay, she’d be given warnings that soon turned to detentions.

Even if at times she wished to just sneak away, she couldn’t, she didn’t want her Parents to be called in and get wind of any other situations.

Marinette sighed as she played with her food, boredom crept on her face before she tuned into that hero announcement appearing on Face To Face.

Despite everyone trying to shove it down the school’s throat, she was ever so slightly curious about it. She may not have been able to voice her opinions to anyone in particular but she just wants to see who this mystery hero was.

Her pink earbuds at the ready and plugged in, she waited until Nadja Chamack’s report would come in, eerily, the whole cafeteria was quiet, the suspense was enough to put anyone silent.

Then, the logo came on, the sound resonated throughout the room since it was on the TV but Marinette stuck to her phone, she didn’t want anyone catching her watching it.

“Don’t be bemused, it’s just the news. Now a new rumour has been circulating throughout Paris about a new superhero appearing to protect the civilians. I’m sure you’re all dying to know just how true it is. Well, I can assure you that only the best reporter in Paris would only speak of the truth, considering I have the key to answer all your questions.” Lights appeared behind her, all moving in different directions before centring on a doorway in the centre of the stage.

“I’m confident you’re very excited to find out who our mysterious hero is, so without further ado, let’s see who it is.” People began to hold their breaths, the excitement of who this bigshot would be, Nebula, Eostrix, or someone even bigger, they didn’t know, but you could hear a pin drop in that cafeteria with how silent it was.

From behind the curtain, there were ruffles, smoke emerged to give off a more dramatic flair as the crowds became excited.

.

.

*A turquoise and light emerald outfit came into view. Baggy clothing on her arms and legs appeared along with white high boots. Her main outfit seemed to reside a sweetheart neckline dress with a mini skirt, although Marinette noticed it gave the girl some mobility to move around instead of being restricting. She also noticed the slight cold colours centring around her skirt, since she always had a keen eye on different types of design patterns. Light blue overlayers obscured most of the skirts view with golden rims on the bottom.

She had a light blue neck jewel, although she couldn’t see much off it, she’d have to admit. Her mask was a gradient of turquoise to match her dress, her hair was tied up in two twin buns, two red hairpins also there she noticed, but the rest left down, Marinette had to wonder how long it would’ve been all down.

There were a lot of things Marinette noticed, however, one thing everyone could agree on…

Was that they had no idea who she was.

“Salutations everyone, why it’s a pleasure to be here.” Marinette had to admit, she looked… Kinda young to be a superhero. And maybe, just maybe, not what she’d envisioned when she’d heard about a hero coming to Paris. Why, she was making an assumption, and she should really know better than to do that since, y’know, but you couldn’t blame her right?

“WHAT? WHO THE HELL IS THAT?” She heard over the other side of the dining room. Of course, it was Alya, she never could control her voice volume. But she couldn’t tell if the ombre girl was upset over it not being Nebula or supposedly getting hyped up for a hero none of them had ever heard off.

Looking back at the screen, she could tell the news reporters seemed a bit taken back as well, Nadja never was good at concealing her emotions, even on air, maybe they had been promised someone else instead?

“O-Oh, I see. Well, I-’ Her recovery was the same, Nadja always fretted she had to rely on the people up in management to give her a line if she couldn’t think off one herself, she wasn’t very good at improv either.

The heroine smiled before walking down to sit beside Nadja.

“I understand the scepticism, my appearance deters most, but that is just a ploy, however, I’m here to make a promise to all off Paris. My name is Soliane Rin and I’m here to risk my life for everyone in Paris, with or without my mask on. All I ask is to be given a chance.” She bowed to the camera, to all off Paris, and Marinette was able to see her smile, her truthful words as the whole dining room stayed silent at her speech.

Marinette seemed to feel…

Hope?

“Ah- no it wasn’t that, it’s just we were given information you were appointed by both Eostrix and Nebula? How? I mean, how did you meet them, or more importantly how did you get to have this opportunity?” She smiled as Nadja had time to recover from her obvious disappointment.

“Oh that, well I had worked with them on a few cases in New York. I had trained for a few years to be just like that until I was finally able to convince them to train me fully. And well I guess they believed I was ready to protect this jurisdiction by myself over time.” Nadja nodded along, seemingly more at ease as the time passed by, more questions being asked and answered before everyone had noticed how much time had passed.

A beep emitted from the girl’s necklace, in turn making her stand up and bowing or at least curtsying once more.

“I’m sorry for the early interruption, but I must be going now, I have some business to attend too” She threw a peace sign as a puff of smoke surrounded her. When it had passed so had she disappeared. As the crew tried to cover from most of their unscripted events. Nadja headed to commercials.

The long-awaited announcement was over, what would the audience’s reactions be like?

“Really? We get a new hero like her? I’ve never even heard of Soliane Rin. Ugh, we might as well have gotten someone like Doorman” Kim flung his arms up into the air before sitting back into his chair.

Not good apparently.

“I know right, and to think I was excited for this” Alya dramatically fell back into her seat. And she was so looking forward to this news as well.

Marinette would admit to feeling more guilt, she may have… Possibly thought the same, but even still, we’re judging a book by its cover, surely, they all should’ve waited until maybe after she had proved herself.

Wait- making her have to prove herself was too judgemental still, she didn’t mean for it to sound that bad, she just- she was just wrestling with the thoughts in her mind.

Not noticing the annoyed looks from the class, the tiniest blush from a blond, or the tiny smirk residing from a brunette.

With a plan in action, she set to work ravelling a new story that was sure to captivate her ‘friends’. With a tremble of the lip and bowing her head, she waited until at least one person would notice her sudden change of expression.

Luckily, her plan went just as she thought.

“Lila? Are you ok, what’s wrong?” Rose, a sweet and naïve girl mind you, immediately took the bait.

And with that, the others finally took notice of her, a new record she thought, after so long she was used to this routine.

She knew how to work them.

“Oh- it’s nothing important, I’m sure you wouldn’t want to spoil the mood.”

Hook

“Hey c’mon girl, you can tell us. What’s on your mind?” Alya pats her shoulder to comfort the smaller girl.

Line

“Are you sure?” Lila asked again timidly, the other girl nodded, in fact, everyone did, and gave encouraging words to her, they couldn’t see the smirk inside her mind.

And sinker.

She fiddled with a piece off her skirt, a habit she formed when noticing they were always a lot more concerned when she fidgeted, it was a clever trick really. Being able to get anyone wrapped around her finger was a power she loved.

“Well, I just think it’s a bit sad really.”

“What was?” Someone asked, at times she didn’t really care who it was that responded, she just knew what the next response would be, she could always make them say what she wanted without them ever knowing…

Oh, she loved this life.

“It was meant to be a surprise.” She rambled on, waiting for someone to stop her, they had to.

“Lila, what are you talking about?” See, she knew how to play this game a thousand times over.

“Well… I wasn’t really meant to tell anyone. But since all of you are my friends, and I know I could trust you with this, so I guess it's fine to say.”

Everyone around the table leaned in, intrigued by what she had to say. Lila took a deep breath in, bracing herself for the aftereffect of her words she knew would come.

“I knew it would happen, that no one would like her, but I had hoped and prayed that you all would, I guess I should’ve asked for someone higher up” It took a few seconds for those words to tick in the aspiring journalists head, but when they were finally processed, she nearly erupted. It was better to make them think of what she said instead of just outright saying it, decent off her to help their brains.

“Wait- you- you were the one to suggest a hero to come to Paris!? OMG girl that is fantastic” Lila gave a small smile as everyone then shouted the usual praise at her, she nodded along before turning her head down.

“But- you all weren’t happy” They all felt guilty at that, maybe that was why Lila had been quiet the entire time while the news was on. She must’ve been checking for their expressions and yet they hurt her feelings instead.

“Sorry- we must’ve just presumed it was gonna be Eostrix or Nebula, that morning probably messed with our responses” Alya laughed as she draped an arm around Lila.

But the ‘lie’ wouldn’t end there.

“I see, I just thought she would’ve wanted more recognition while being here” Out of nowhere she started crying more, everyone tried to comfort her, but it was no use.

“She’s just such a nice person, and so kind. When I last met her, she was still in training and I promised I would promote her as much as I could” She sniffed as Rose handed her a tissue which she greedily took a hold of.

Before they could exclaim their surprise she immediately jumped right back into her story.

“I knew I should’ve tried harder; I should’ve gotten Nebula or Eostrix. I’m sorry I ruined everyone’s day. I- I should’ve left my big mouth shut. I’m sorry guys” Their guilt immediately intensified.

Lila had done all of that for them, and they had quite easily tossed it aside without realising, how could they? And to one-off their best friends? Despicable, absolutely despicable.

Wait, why did that sound vaguely familiar?

Oh well, Lila was more important.

“Lila no” Alya cooed in a soft voice, feeling mostly responsible, hyping everyone else up and being one of the first ones to dismiss the new hero entirely. She tries to comfort Lila was the least she could do.

“It’s not your fault Lila” Her plan came together.

“Of course, not. We shouldn’t have judged her so quickly” Just like all the others.

“We’re sorry, so sorry Lila.” And she knew how to do it so efficiently.

“We shouldn’t have judged so quickly” Lila’s smirk in her mind grew in size, they were so wrapped around her finger.

As Alya was happily explaining that she would be in fact honoured to create a blog about this new hero- she had forgotten her name, and would quite happily like to interview Lila as well to be able to learn anything else about the hero, a lone figure grew upset.

Lila had just created another lie, she was used to that, but for it to be about the new hero, couldn’t Lila tell just how dangerous that could be? I mean sure, it would be great to actually be able to meet a hero, let alone be friends with one. But to publicly announce that? Was she crazy? Did she want a massive target on her back?

She could only hope no one would buy into that blog, as mean as it was, but she didn’t want them to get physically hurt.

She could only hope that the new hero wouldn’t care about fake news or blatant lies.

She truly could only hope.

.

As shoes tapped against the floor along the dining room, a new figure turned her head.

She had been walking around her new school, looking around for entrances, exits and just in general any hidden secrets. She had previously asked for a school plan from a teacher, but had been informed that her students would be more than happy to help her instead, and she needn’t need some piece of paper. But that didn’t suit her, so when she wasn’t looking, she may have just acquired one anyway. She was quiet so she wouldn’t have been caught.

Now she was walking through the dining hall, she had wanted to take in the cafeteria, just in case there were any rooms she had missed, until she heard footsteps approaching her.

“Hey Rosaniline, come join us, we haven’t seen you all lunch.” She knew she’d have to concede, having analysed each person in her class, she knew, Alya, would not take no as an answer.

So, she flashed her innocent smile and nodded along, it may prove useful to study them further.

Her arm was grabbed before they walked over to a table full of people, so different from the other tables.

“So, newbie where were you? You totally missed the special hero announcement.” Alix asked her, the others looked over to see her answer, if Rosaniline hadn’t been used to having a crowd around her she believed she would’ve been nervous as hell.

“I had taken the liberty off looking around the school, I’m afraid I can get pretty lost in large places, I only wished to remember the layout beforehand.” She placed her hands together with a bright smile appearing. It was half a lie; she couldn’t exactly state her true reason, now could she?

The ombre haired girl pulled a large smile onto her face. She was just like Adrien, new, polite and a literal ball of sunshine, she thought before sneakily looking over at the blond-haired person who hadn’t said much, most probably due to his shy nature due to his upbringing.

She latched onto Adrien’s arm before practically flinging him towards Rosaniline.

She literally took falling for someone to a whole new level.

“Well looks like the two of you would get along swimmingly” Her new ship was bound to sail, she could see it now, their immediate attraction for each other, the dates and interactions they’ll have before proclaiming their love in the rain, a sentimental scene in which she’ll be gladly recording while hiding behind a tree.

I mean who wouldn’t just map out her new friends love life in a matter of minutes of knowing each other?

But… It may just become a crash course instead. They rubbed their heads simultaneously due to bumping into each other. However, one was ever so slightly overjoyed with being in such close proximity to her while the other would think that prank wasn’t funny in the least.

Before any of the duo could express their annoyance/apologise and maybe a get together sometime, someone of course just had to interrupt the moment.

“Oh, Rosaniline we need to apologise to you” Rosann had expected the apology to come from Alya but it appeared that girl didn’t know that she had done something wrong.

“We’re so sorry that you have to sit next to her” That caught Rosann’s attention, what did they mean by that? They must’ve noticed her confused face as the explained further.

“Oh, you poor thing, you really don’t know do you?” Well, no. That is what she wanted to say, she was new, of course she wouldn’t know, hell she hadn’t even been able to see the whole layout as she had planned to. She was sure there was a hidden basement somewhere, she just needed to locate it.

“That girl, the one you have to sit next to in class. The one with dark blue hair?” They all tried to provide as many details as they could without trying to make it too obvious, but Rosann was able to make out who exactly they were talking about.

She took a sneaky glance towards the person the group had started to talk about. She heard a few words of bullying, mean, lies and stalker before zoning it out, she needed to concentrate.

The girl, in a pink jacket and a grey skirt. Sitting alone on a table that seemed to be mocking her by how big it was. All of the tables were big, possibly to do with teachers wanting students to sit with their friends.

But she wasn’t with anyone, she just absentmindedly played with her food as nothing interesting happened.

Rosann stared, that girl, she hadn’t seen her smile once, or even display any kind of positive emotion. She was just lonely; couldn’t they see that?

That girl needed to be saved!

***

Midnight.

Or at least close to that time she thought.

She didn’t know, she had spent many a night out on her balcony just sketching in her book. One would think it would’ve been too cold but the bluenette didn’t mind, she had been used to it, the wind wasn’t particularly chilly out here, even if it was late September. This was part of her routine anyway. Staying up late was just something she was used to, her sleeping schedule was the worse. But she produced so many fantastic ideas when she was awake at night, it was a sacrifice she was willing to take.

With her earbuds plugged in, she was jolted out of her streak when she heard a different notification pop up, pulling out her phone she looked at what could’ve possibly caused it.

[BREAKING NEWS: New Hero Prevents Bank Robbery On First Day.]

Marinette smiled at that. Her first achievement, in Paris of course, she knew she had done a lot before, she had checked a few articles before, although she did have to rely on google translate on a few instances, but this hadn’t been the only thing she had prevented. There had been house fires to museum robberies to even outright terrorist attacks, and yet she was able to stop them all, she did have some help but from what Marinette could make out the other heroes got there after taking most of the civilians out of the buildings, and from what she could tell, she could’ve easily handled everything herself.

She could see Soliane didn’t need to prove herself to others if she was just given a chance for everyone to see what she could do.

To not be judged based on baseless accusations tossed her way. For people to look through and see the truth!

.

.

She didn’t know who that had been aimed at, but she knew she just wanted to get back to her sketching.

But… She couldn’t.

Not now.

Not when she heard a noise behind where she had been sitting!

She quickly dropped her belongings as she jumped up from her chair.

-

Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, but she knew she had heard something, it wasn’t just her hearing she knows that.

She knew something had happened; something was there. When she stayed put, trying to concentrate more- she heard slight breathing, slow and- hurting!?

She didn’t know who it was, she didn’t know their intentions or they alliance, but, if something was hurt, she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she didn’t check it out.

So, she quietly approached the wall, having to stand on the bricks on the side of the wall since she wasn’t tall enough before pushing herself up.

!!!

‘That’s-!’

Even in the night she could see a prominent colour.

Turquoise!

“It- no it can’t be! Soliane Rin!” She whispered more to herself, but even still she couldn’t comprehend how this could have happened.

Noises of pain interrupt her train of thought. She- she was hurt!

Her mind had taken action, and immediately propelled her forward, she couldn’t leave someone out here in the middle of the night hurting, even if she was a hero, she was still human!

She ran towards her, instantly trying to ask if she was ok? Where was she hurt and if she can respond?

But nothing came, no answer, nada. She had to check if she was alright.

She came closer, forgetting about maybe not accidentally startling the young hero.

Her hand was caught midway to the hero, she gasped, her reflexes were still there. Her head was nonetheless limp and her left hand resting on her abdomen.

“W- who ar-” She grunted in pain again. Marinette shot forward to grab her before she could fall back.

“Hey, m-my name is Marinette Dupain-Cheng, you’re on my roof right now. Please let me help you” Through her strength, she opened one eye to look at her. And through her eyes, she could only see one thing.

Sincerity.

“Right- leg… anti” Her breathing grew slower, as if she were falling unconscious, Marinette had no idea if it would’ve been eternal.

But Marinette was able to determine what she had meant. Looking her over, she looked at her leg, her baggy clothes were slightly torn but that didn’t matter now, slipping her hand inside, she hoped Soliane wouldn’t mind her hand being cold, she tried searching for it, for her antidote.

Her fingertips tried reaching out until she felt smooth glass. Wrapping her fingers around and pulling it out she pulled it up for further inspection.

The writing around the glass wasn’t in French unlucky for her, however, there were pictures, she had to quickly conclude this would’ve been used for situations just like this.

The picture appeared to show that it should be drunken not spread on the wound, so she quickly unscrewed the cap. Looking back at the hero she could tell she had indeed turned paler, she wasn’t faring so well, she knew she needed to do it quick.

Tilting her head back so she could pour it down her throat, she could only pray that she wasn’t too late.

.

.

One minute.

.

.

Two minutes!

Why wasn’t anything happening!?

Marinette had to take a deep breath, maybe it would need some time to take an effect.

In the meantime, maybe she could look her over to see if there were any other injuries. And then maybe go downstairs to collect some supplies. Living as a baker meant she knew her way around burns, scars and scratches, so they were always prepared with a medical box in the kitchen.

Looking at her over appeared to be the right choice in action. Her lower abdomen had been hit, Marinette reasoned with herself that must have been why she had yet taken her handoff.

But as Marinette covered her own mouth with her hand, she was a gasped at how much blood there was.

Now what? She couldn’t tell her Parents, she loved them, she really did, but she knew how loud her Dad would get whenever he got happy, angry, or frightened, she knew it wouldn’t be a smart choice, especially with how jumpy the hero was. Not like she couldn’t blame her.

Then that would mean calling an ambulance might be out of the equation as well, plus the Soliane Rin may not want the publicity of her going to the hospital after only one day of patrolling. She knew if she had gotten cold feet or even hurt like this on her first day heroing they’d be a high chance of her giving up.

Well… She was a seamstress.

She had been doing it for a very long time, so she knew the ins and outs of sewing.

But still… It could be extremely risky, and she’d need to get consent first… But if she didn’t wake up… And she knew how open wounds could be, how dangerous it could be if they didn’t get any treatment, and how much trouble she’d be in if she accidentally killed the hero when trying to help her.

.

Well…

She had dreamed of some adventure in her life…

And she got her wish.

***

Stitch… Stitch…

Flick-

“Ahh!-”

“So-sorry”

Her prayers off Soliane Rin waking up were answered, after she had collected a few blankets, medical supplies, and a needle & thread, she had come back up.

Only to find Soliane on her balcony, if it wasn’t for her shock, she knew she would’ve screamed out zombie.

How she had the strength to get there she would never know, but she had to guess, heroes have all sorts of endurance.

She quickly sped to catch her. She did reprehend her of course; it was in her caring nature, so she just had to.

But… The way she weakly smiled at her, she couldn’t help feeling guilty, she probably was in so much pain and here she was berating her for- for what exactly.

This was why they had all left her. She was too quick to jump the gun, to jump to conclusions, too fast to even see from anyone else’s perspective.

Which is why she was a perfect target.

She lowered her onto her bed, careful not to hurt her anymore. Setting her down so she would’ve been comfortable, lots of pillows to help as well, she was glad she brought so many in her childhood. Or whenever her Nonna would come, she’d always get a new toy from her travels.

And that was when she set to work, conversing with her about what she may have to do, and as hesitant as Soliane was, she also knew there was no choice.

“Fine, I’ll trust you Marinette” Those words felt like a gift, in any other situation she would have been jumping for joy, getting acknowledged by a hero? That was amazing.

But- she really couldn’t celebrate, the look in Soliane Rin’s eyes, the were… Fearful. She knew she wasn’t trusted, yet. But she would prove it.

Snip, snip.

The room was silent, no words had been muttered or mentioned, Marinette was concentrating on her stitching, just hoping she wouldn’t hurt her anymore. She must have regretted her decision now, of course, she had, anyone with the right of mind would’ve. No wait- she didn’t mean it like that! She just meant-

“It’s not your fault. I- shouldn’t have let my guard down” It became silent again, and this time Marinette had a lot more to think about. There had been one thing that was stuck on her mind and couldn’t leave her mind.

“H-How did it happen?” She saw Soliane grab a nearby pillow even tighter than she had.

She knew she should’ve kept her mouth shut! It wasn’t her place to ask anyway.

Before she could utter any type of apology, she was stopped when she heard her start to speak.

“It was right after one-off my patrol routes. I was surveying the city, just in case, I needed to report anything else. I guess- due to this being my first time alone, as well as having previously prevented some other crimes, I would have to say I wasn’t in the same mindset.” Marinette stayed quiet so she could continue without pressure, she knew from personal experience how frustrating it could be to start talking and get interrupted by someone else, it was always a pet peeve of hers, making her not wanting to finish her story out of pettiness.

“So… When I was too busy with moving around on my wire. I was shot!” Marinette jolted away, she knew something drastic had to have happened, and she had tried to brace herself. But she couldn’t, it sounded so surreal.

“I was careless, it was such a stupid mistake, no novice would’ve been hurt like me” Marinette jumped again, she was so serious, and so… Angry with herself. But, she had just saved a bank from robbers, of course, she could’ve been tired, she was human after all.

“And due to my shock, I wasn’t able to pinpoint who it had been. A poisoned bullet had just barely scared me, and I was still affected by it… Sir would be so disappointed in me.”

The last stitch had been completed. She was done, now she just had to bandage it. She noticed Soliane seemed physically more relaxed.

“I should be going now, I’ve troubled you too much” She was trying to get up, but even the bluenette knew she would still be in pain for a while, just until she would get herself checked out, probably as her civilian self.

“No, you’re still hurt. If you move too early the stitches might come undone” She laid a gentle hand on her, just enough to draw attention to herself.

“But I must, I need to report back, besides, don’t you need to go to sleep?” Yeah but- the words paused in her throat, why could she say anything?

“You’ve already helped me so much, surely you’d prefer me to leave, it would be unbefitting for a hero to be seen so helpless for so long?” She saw it, her face, it was just like her a complete replica, always so helpful, to never think about yourself even when it could be life or death.

…Ok maybe that last part was a bit extreme.

“Hey, don’t try to suggest that, I could never think that! You still need help, just because you’re a hero doesn’t mean you can’t rely on anyone else.”

…Maybe it was her stubborn side, or even her Mother’s. But she couldn’t even think of the hero going out in that condition.

Grabbing her hand, she was adamant about letting Soliane Rin stay. So, she just told her.

Told her that she can’t just go out in that condition.

Told her that she needed to get better, because if she was still hurt, how could she save other people. And how she also needs to look after herself.

Told her that… She shouldn’t have so many expectations of her, because it won’t do her any good, mentality wise… And if the expectations become broken, she’d be unrightfully angry at herself.

Told her that- oh god she was arguing with a hero in her bedroom and she wasn’t saying anything.

She wasn’t saying anything! She’s just standing there looking at her. Never had Marinette wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out?

“I-I’m sorry, I should have never shouted like that, you were just doing your job and here I come saying you need to stop- wait not to stop I meant maybe slow down, although if you wanted to carry on then that’s fine by me. What am I saying you don’t need my permission; you don’t need anyone's! Do you-?” Her hands had been waving in front of her frantically. She just couldn’t imagine all of this would’ve been happening to her, her emotions were spreading out of control. She really needed to compose herself.

-

Wait, why did she grab her hand?

“I -ahem- it's fine, I’m incredibly humbled by your generosity. You have a big heart, not many have such kindness like you” She brought her hand closer to her mouth, and the blue-haired girls’ heart was pounding more and more.

“I shall stay” She pressed the hand to her mouth, a small feeling off lips against her skin sent shivers down her back while she held her gaze.

“So long as mi Belle stays with me” It took her a moment to compose herself. It took another to realise to she was talking about her… It to yet another to compose herself from that.

“Sou yure- I mean you show- ah, I’m mean. Yes.” Marinette felt as if she couldn’t say no, and yet, she didn’t feel uncomfortable, she felt accommodated. She believed if she had said no, she wouldn’t have felt pressured by the hero to stay.

And she smiled at that.

They both had.

So sincere.

***

The morning had come.

And not a moment too soon.

Light poured through her drawn curtains, and her first reaction was to grab the closest thing to plummet it towards the sun.

Not like that would’ve done anything mind you. It would’ve just been to make her point.

Rising up and stretching her arms, she headed down her steps, it had been a weekend, after all, she was allowed a lie in occasionally.

Although, she felt oddly a lot more refreshed than she had remembered, what had change-

Soliane Rin!?

Her head zoomed around the room, where- where was she?

No one was in the room besides her.

So- was it just a dream? Did she really see just imagine it all?

But she couldn’t have, wouldn’t that have just been too cruel, even for her?

Did the gods really hate her as well?

Wait-

That piece of paper wasn’t there before?

Stepping over to her desk, she gently picks it up, almost afraid she’d rip it up.

As her eyes traced over the first words, her mind relaxed.

‘Dear mi Belle, apologise for “dropping in unannounced” and to cause you such trouble. Don’t worry, I’ll be fine thanks to you, I’ll promise to be more careful next time, sincerely your local hero, Soliane Rin…’

Her heart fluttered in gratitude; those events were real. She really did meet her.

As her hands curled around the letter, she smiled. A true sincere smile.

Because after so long, she felt…

Hope.

***

*I absolutely suck at describing clothes, which is why I much prefer to draw instead, I literally have no idea what some clothes types are called so I always end up having to ask my Mum and even then, she doesn’t know half the time so I may end up not describing much clothing in the future so sorry.

Well, I hope you liked it, I do believe these chapters are gonna end up getting longer and longer. I know a few of them are but hopefully, you won’t mind that. It will just make my progress slow but hey I was always slow so it shouldn’t matter too much right? Anyway, well Marinette has met the hero and classmate, she’s definitely different to my other version. But I do hope you like both versions.

Oh, and I may need help with Jess/Jace. I know that she’s Native American, but I’m unsure if there’s any type of detail I must include for them, for example, I’m aware that they don’t cut their hair for symbolic reasons? I’m not even wholeheartedly sure about that. So, I would like to ask if there’s any information that I’m forgetting/missing and I would love to be informed, aka if I need to include a tribe, any type of clothing that would be appropriate to wear or activities they do. Sorry if it seems stupid, I just want to be informed and try my best to make an accurate representation. You can ask me questions, but I will apologise if I don’t understand them in advance. (Just so you know, I’m changing everyone’s design but I’m definitely changing her earrings, I just keep having images of someone pulling them out ugh, hence why I’ll never draw large earrings that people could grab)

Also, if you’re confused about anything feel free to ask any questions.

Cya next time.

Note: Please tell me if I should add anything else to the card, there will be one of these cards for all 15 chapters, however, because I have uni work all updates will be slower because I really need to focus on the uni stuff, then I might be able to upload quicker. They also may change in the future because I can never stop adding stuff.

[firstknightss]

GWAINCELOT ESSAY THREE???

[commentary voice] ah yes and this gwaincelot essay.... which turned into a fic was inspired by @nextstopparis and @little-ligi

GWAINE TEACHING LANCELOT HOW TO READ. and thats how they actually CONFESS.

imagine gwaine seeing lancelot trip up reading leon’s plan for the day, seeing him trying to understand it. and gwaines, hes a little in love. Hes. Hes a little hit with feelings for this Noble (tm) knight. So OF COURSE he CANT EMOTION and he tries to show his affection for lancelot without yknow being in ‘loVE’

he comes over with his swishy hair and bantery tone like “oooOhHh LANCELOT! Lancey! Hey! Hello! Can’t read leon’s goddamn awful handwriting huh?”

And Lancelots embarrassed and flushes red and gwaine thinks hes Fucked Up (and he really doesn’t want to fuck this up, this is the first time he’s actually felt emotions this deep for someone) and tries to fix it panickedly, like the Anxiety Clown He Is.

He keeps on saying sorry and apologising, and Lancelot, the EVER CALM KNIGHT GUY, goes “it’s fine, it’s okay. It’s nothing to do with you...” and then he hesitates. He HESITATES. “....it’s just that...” and then he BITES HIS LIP and gwaine thinks he might just faint there and then, “...i cant read.”

and now it hits him, gwaine, gwaine, who thought literacy was something trash and something he didn’t really need, realises how important it is. and so, yknow because hes kind of wrapped in those Emotions (tm), he pulls lancelot’s sleeve after practice, when they’re alone in the changing room. (and if lancelot wasn’t so tired and miserable, he would have easily seen gwaine BLUSH)

And he, shyly asks if lancelot wouldnt mind being tutored by him.

Now Lancelot is OVERJOYED, and he’s borderline CRYING because lancelot, poor old village boy lancelot who’d been kicked out of the knights of camelot, and had to become a MERCENARY and fight for masters who didn’t care for him, has NEVER HAD someone literally CARE about him so much. (Apart from Merlin. He loves merlin <3)

so now imagine lancelot waking up an hour early the next morning, and showing up into gwaine’s room. He knows gwaine literally doesnt sleep with a lock, so he just barges in, and starts shaking gwaine.

Now GWAINE sleeps like a Log (had so much shit going on irl, time to sleep it away) and when he opens his bleary eyes, seeing lancelot in one of his stupid v neck shirts over him, hes like “....h...helo??”

and lancelot’s all like. “We- werent YOU gonna give me reading lessons.” And gwaine nods, yawning (and in that moment lancelot thinks gwaine looks unimaginably cute, so cute that he wants to literally ruffle gwaine’s hair and run his hands through how silky and brown it is.)

THEN gwaine pulls on the dont care-ish mask, and makes his arms into a pillow under his head, as he leans against the wall behind his bed, in some kind of somewhat???flirty??? manner??? [i dont...i dont know what hes trying to do. On the other hand! Not does Lancelot :) ]

Lancelot, does not realise this is gwaine’s poor attempt at flirting - since he’s seen gwaine ACTUALLY flirting and this is like. Nothing. And its also poorly executed. Which is NOTHING like gwaine.

So he pulls gwaine’s arm, and half hauls him out of bed.

As gwaine’s head crashes into lancelot’s stomach, he can smell lancelot’s clothes. They smell of flowers, and cotton and everything so natural and gwaine, who literally smells of wine, and wood and Tavern. (And aftershave, or the 500AD equivalent)

[see here, see im trying to bring themes of dionysis okay. OkayyyyyyyyY. yours truly likes looking at greek mythology. And both these two complete dionysis]

Gwaine, in his sleepy stupor, nestles his head on Lancelot’s hip, who gives a sigh and stands there. One hand clutching gwaine’s, leaving the other free.....

....to rake through his soft, flowy brown hair. And twirl his fingers through its waves, and Gwaine cuddles in further.

And since Lancelot left the door open, Leon (the other bitch who wakes up at 4am to do idk nothing) sees them two...like that, illuminated by the SUNLIGHT behind them, and smiles a little.

And then he trips over the stairs, the moment is lost.

Gwaine and Lancelot pull away at the same time, and gwaine’s face turns back to “ha ha im a Jerk (tm)” and if he wasnt too busy trying to hide how flustered he was, he’d see Lancelot looking at him the way he used to look at GWEN.

They both blink and look at each other, understandingly, neither of them to speak of this again.

And then Gwaine drags himself out of bed, and Lancelot raises his eyebrows as he watches him (totally not checking him out) haul out a book from his cupboard.

Gwaine’s too sleepy for this, he keeps yawning and rubbing his eyes (looking like a cat, Lancelot notes) and Lancelot takes a deep breath, his eyes understanding.

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“Lancelot, I love..” he bites his tongue, cursing his half asleep mind “..doing this, and love hanging out with you...I just cant stay up this early.”

Reading lessons, from now on, are at 1:30am-whenever Gwaine and Lancelot stop rambling about Odysseus and Circe and Telemachus

[i dont know any other ancient books apart from like. Ancient greek/Roman ones. So i guess. Its not historically accurate,,,,BUUIT this is a fanfic for a pair who had like no scenes together SO i think i can take some ✨creative liberties✨]

Lancelot has heard of the journey of Aneas from travelling bards, singing songs in his native old english. Gwaine’s eyes are quick at latin, and he learnt the flaws of Romulus and Remus in his pure latin. Gwaine’s a good teacher, and lancelot is a quick study, and it’s not long before they’re arguing over which Goddess caused the most harm in the Illiad.

Gwaine’s never met someone who he could reveal that he loved reading to, he loved doing.

Lancelot’s never met someone who he could tell he couldn’t read, and ask if they could teach him, love learning.

They make it work.

The other knights notice, of course they notice. Percival notices how Lancelot stumbles into the Gwaine’s room at night, bright eyed. Elyan notices Lancelot and Gwaine’s voices from Gwaine’s room opposite him; sometimes slow, Gwaine speaking slowly and Lancelot following; sometimes heated and passionate.

(They’re arguing. They’re arguing about how to pronounce Minerva)

Merlin finds the two, in the early hours of the morning - when the birds are figuring what song they sing today - on Gwaine’s bed.

Gwaine leaned against the bedframe, his trousered legs splayed over the sheets. Loosely braided, long brown hair fell over his closed eyelids, his mouth in a small smile.

And Merlin follows his arm draped over Lancelot, snuggled beside him, his head on his broad shoulder, every breath of wind pushing against curly black hair, making it almost /bounce/. His eyes are covered by the other man’s hair, and he looks...content. More content than Merlin has ever seen him.

He slips out as quietly as he came in, and smirks, hes gotta tell arthur they finally got their shit together oh GOD

Its no surprise to anyone but them, when Arthur pulls Lancelot out of training, and into his chambers.

“I’m glad you’ve found someone Lancelot.” He starts, his face geniune, his voice giving away hints of relief. (He thought he was never going to see his knight smile again after all the ordeals that had happened to him)

“Oh...” Lancelot’s heart sinks, “...how did you find out, Sire?”

Arthur blinks, taking in the change of mood in Lancelot, maybe it wasn’t anything important, maybe they were trying to keep it casual, hell they didnt want the king knowing.

“I- uh, I just noticed...” Goddamnit Merlin, and Goddamn his need to tell him everything he saw. (Merlin had advised him not to do this, as they sat on his bed after a long night. This was really his fault.)

Lancelot pales, and he places his hands down on the table beside him, palms slapping stone as he did so.

“Well, I guess I should tell you the whole truth then,” his voice is quiet, and Arthur steps closer, “Sire I am not of Noble birth, and was born in a village - as you know.”

Arthur nods, his arms crossed, but his Kingly Bravado fell away at the sight of his knight, and one of his closest friends, being this vulnerable.

“Yes I know, but what does this ha-“

“And we children in the village we-“ he falters, “-we were never taught to read.”

“Yes, no I understand, I-“ he pauses, Lancelot’s words hitting him a bit too late, this was about literacy?

This, this whole conversation was about literacy?

Not being gay?

Merlin was going to have a field day

“Sire?”

“I understand Lancelot, and is this why you feel a little out of place with the other knights?” He carries it on, with a smile, he has a few questions to ask merlin.

“Yes, and that’s why I asked Gwaine to tutor me from time to time, although, the sessions carry through late into the night, which may have been affecting my performance at practice. I’ll have you know that this is a temporary th-“

“It’s fine Lancelot,” Arthur places a hand on his shoulder, “You are still exceptional at practice,”

“Thank you Sire,” Lancelot twinkles.

✨

“Theyre, theyre not together?” Merlin cant stop laughing, tears streaming down his face, “theyre not TOGETHER?? oh my God arthur what did you DO”

They sit together on Arthur’s bed, drinking wine from stemless cups together, with Arthur recounting the events of the day; red faced.

“I mean, it was your idea Merlin.”

“I just saw them, and I assumed...I didnt...I didnt think youd ASK them.”

“What do you think I’d do then?? Let them be on their merry way.”

“Yes!”

✨

“Do you like me?” Gwaine asks, unexpectedly, one night, the moon vibrant against the loud sea.

“You’re...tolerable...” Lancelot says, a smile tugging at his lips, as the silver moonlight falls against his hair, a halo around him.

✨

The knights give them the look every morning, as the two of them stumbled out of the same room, more frequently than ever.

Sometimes Lancelot would throw on Gwaine’s shirt, when he’d crumpled his own beyond repair. Sometimes Gwaine would put some of Lancelot’s hair oil on, when his hair was frizzy.

They gave each other knowing looks when Gwaine and Lancelot started whispering and giggling like a bunch of schoolgirls.

✨

And then Stupid gwaine had to go get fucking stabbed, and their delicate dance was like trying to waltz through a minefield.

Lancelot clutches onto Gwaine’s arm as Merlin feels his forehead with shaking hands.

“He’s burning up.”

“Infection...?” Lancelot sounds broken, and nods, fumbling with his pack to find some bandages.

It was just a simple quest; a save the day, get the girl, do various harmless shenanigans type of quest.

He’d half expected Gwaine to get the girl, and he cant help but give out a half choked laugh. Gwaine had no idea what hit him when she turned out to be the evil one all along.

He tries to forget that Gwaine showed no interest in her, he tries to forget that Gwaine’s been less frequent at the Tavern, he tries to forget that he hasn’t seen Gwaine with anyone since months now.

Gwaine, his beautiful Gwaine was lying on his lap, hot red blood rushing from his side, staining his polished chainmail with dark, sticky blood.

He’s been out for nearly an hour now, and Lancelot remembers carrying him, through the entire forest, forgetting his sword and his helmet and just grabbing Gwaine and getting the shit out of there.

Gwaine’s lack of self preservation was really rubbing off on Lancelot nowadays.

Merlin watches as Lancelot holds back tears, his own eyes stinging. Gwaine can’t die like this, he can’t die like this....

“hælan beorn adl”

Merlin’s eyes flashed gold, and Lancelot could feel warmth coming back into the fingers he was grabbing.

He was coming back.

And then the weight of everything hits him.

He was in Fucking Love.

✨

“Hey.” Gwaine’s voice is rough from disuse, but Lancelot nearly sobs when he hears the voice.

“Don’t fucking do that to me again, amor meus.” He puts his head down on Gwaine’s chest; finding the hammering of his heart calming.

He shimmies onto Merlin’s bed, which Gwaine had been lying in for the past few days.

“Did you mean, ami meus?” Gwaine sounds tired, too tired to be awake.

“Huh? Did i say something else?” Lancelot decides to play dumb, a sparkle in his eyes,

“I thought I heard amor meus,” Gwaine pushes his nose into Lancelot’s hair, taking in the wonderful smell of coconut.

“Well then, at least your hearing’s okay, amor meus.”

Gwaine gulped, and was sure Lancelot could hear his loud swallow.

“Lancelot, I hope this isnt a big joke with me teachin you latin and all,” Gwaine’s voice is a little wobbly from the slee deprivation and the magic and the pain numbers, “because I’ll have you know that I really love you, and I cant go on like this any longer,”

“Its okay Gwaine, I learnt latin from the man I love, of course it’s not a joke.”

“The man you love? Who’s tha-“

Realisation hits him like a brick.

Oh.

Oh.

“Me?” His voice cracks, and Lancelot looks up, a smirk on his face.

“Of course dumbass.”

“Like I’m meant to know that,” Gwaine tries to keep his dont care-ish aura, but they both know he’s too exhausted to keep that up.

“mmm?”

Gwaine kisses him on the nose, and he wraps himself around him.

And thats how Merlin finds them later that day, eyes blinking as he stood there.

✨

“I’m glad you’ve found someone, Lancelot.” Arthur coughs.

“Is that what that whole talk was about???”

“Answer the question.” His words sound harsh, but he’s barely hiding a smile.

“I’m glad too, I’m Glad I found Gwaine too.” Lancelot blushes, turning to gwaine.

“Why are you asking anyway, Princess?”

“Oh just, making sure this time.”

[erekiosuncreativeideas]

The Part-Time Puppeteer - Chapter 05

<= Chapter 4

Summary : Lukas gets a once in a lifetime chance. Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/23828971/chapters/77002538

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I'M SO SORRY FOR THE HUGE HIATUS PEOPLE, AAAAAH ANYWAY, NEW CHAPTER, I HOPE YOU'LL LIKE IT (and yeah, I'm getting back to work on this fanfic full time now, expect updates from time to time).

You'll notice my writing style has improved since then, so don't be too surprised.

Happy reading ! Thank you for waiting all this time, it really means a lot!

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Chapter 5 - Wait. What?

It would be an understatement to say that the young man was confused to no end. He wasn’t just unsettled by the whole thing– he was absolutely bewildered. Him, taking the role of an actor? And, more than that, taking MJ’s role out of everyone’s ? Man, this couldn’t be real, this just couldn’t be. Yet… Here he was, in front of everyone, holding a script with shaking hands, and his heart pounding like crazy in his chest. Fuck, fuck, fuck, there was no way he was going to do that, no fucking way–

-“I, uh… I don’t think it’s a very good idea…” he mumbled, his eyes looking away while a deep blush crept its way onto his cheeks. He wasn’t an actor, he had no experience in this, oh, why, why did he laugh so loud?

His weak statement and his trembling stance made the Conductor scoff, and a mocking smile appeared on his lips for the first time since the latter had entered the room. The man lied back against his chair and gave his colleague a playful yet strong nudge:

-“Would you look at that,” cackled the old man with his Scottish accent: “Someone’s having stage fright!”

The other man rubbed at the place the Conductor had touched him, not really liking sudden touches coming from the other apparently:

-“Yes, darling, I’ve noticed,” he replied with an unimpressed expression. Grooves’s eyes then fell on the young stagehand again and he tried to reassure him with a warm smile. Unsurprisingly, this didn’t help in the slightest.

-“Is this your first acting experience?” the man asked the student, putting his chin into the palm of his hand.

-“… Yeah,” Lukas answered trustfully. As much as he hated MJ’s guts, it was still undeniable that the latter knew how to play a role perfectly. Whether it was from the gestures, the stance, the tone of his voice, or his confidence in front of a camera… It was all so different with Lukas. He gulped down and tried to voice his concerns once more: “I really think that you shouldn’t-”

However, he was soon cut short by the Conductor’s voice. The movie maker had picked up his cone and had shouted a loud “action!” inside, showing his impatience and making Lukas pale instantly at the same time. Oh shit, shit, wait, no– He didn’t want to do this, this was way out of his comfort zone…! And he could hear people giggling at him in the distance, among the stagehands watching him fiddling with the script! Oh this was so humiliating, so humiliating, he couldn’t do this…!

-“Just read the bad guy’s line,” Grooves’s suave voice interrupted his thoughts, most likely in an attempt to calm him down, though it wasn’t helping: “We know you haven’t learnt them like the young lady here, so don’t worry about stammering,” Next to him, the little girl was staring at him with a mix of compassion and second-hand embarrassment. This experience kinda reminded him of the school projects he had had to do in the past, and still did as of today… But like, a hardcore version of them, for a topic he had no prior knowledge in. Oh, sure, if this had been a law-related project, he wouldn’t be so terrified right now. But it wasn’t. In any case, his eyes fell on the papers he was holding and he tried taking a deep breath, gulping down his saliva again with a lot of troubles.

He wasn’t going to get out of this until he actually tried it, was he? God, what did he get himself into…

-“Y-you… You reached my h-home, little one,” he read, his voice shaking. Right before he could start the next line, a loud “cut!” interrupted him: the Conductor. Lukas’s face paled up once again. Oh fuck, he had just said a single sentence and it was already that bad, he knew he wasn’t an actor, he knew he was terrible at playing a role, he had never done that before!

With trembling lips, he glanced to the directors with fear. Would they fire him? No, how could they? This wasn’t even the main purpose of his job! His job was to lift things and repair broken stuff! Not this!

A moment of silent passed in which the student couldn’t move, completely paralyzed. What were they going to tell him? Would they make fun of him? Was everyone going to? While the stagehands looked amused, it wasn’t really the case for the directors, which did nothing to help Lukas to feel better at all. And when he thought they were about to tell him to drop the script and go back to what he could do, he was taken aback when he heard a “EVERYONE, OUT” from the Conductor. The student couldn’t help but be startled by the other’s volume. Wait, what-

He looked around, confused. As he saw the stagehands leaving the room, he started to walk away- but Grooves stopped him in his momentum:

-“Not you, darling, you stay here,” instructed the eccentric man, a smirk visible on his lips. Oh fuck, what, what was going on…?

Soon enough, everyone left the room… Except for the directors, the kid, her dad, and him. Oh shit, it was one thing to read a script in public, but now, it felt even more… Official!

-“B-but, I’m not…” he tried to interject, but wasn’t allowed to continue:

-“If being watched is making you scared, then there you go,” shrugged the Conductor, as if he hadn’t yelled a minute ago: “Problem solved,” he then pointed to the papers in Lukas’ hands and gave him an look that clearly meant ‘hurry up’: “Now, eyes on the script and read.”

The young man still tried to protest, but the old producer shouted yet another “action!”, making him jump out of surprise and nervousness. He really… Didn’t have any choice, apparently. Closing his eyes for a moment, he took a deep breath. After all, he couldn’t get fired for this, right? And there were considerably less people watching him… Surely this wouldn’t be worse than before! And, hell, even if he did fail, then who cared? No one (or almost no one) was watching him now, and there weren’t going to be consequences for it anyway.

So why the hell not, after all? He still found it stupid how his laughter had caught the men’s attention, but yeah: he didn’t have anything to lose. So, after another deep breath… The stagehand straightened up and tried to appear more confident.

Ha. What a joke.

-“You reached my home, little one,” he repeated his first line, trying to sound as creepy as that fucking puppet MJ had been holding earlier: “F-fear not, my dear, for I will not hurt you. I don’t- I do not harm my friends,” he stammered, wondering how he had managed to go that far. Well, at least, he wasn’t being interrupted this time… So this was good, he supposed?

-“Who are you?” the little girl replied, going back in character so fast that Lukas wouldn’t even believe she was acting. Damn, she was good. Way better than him, without a doubt. She had tilted her head to the side, a fake confused expression painted on her face as she approached him curiously. Yeah, she looked way more experienced than he was. But the directors still remained silent, watching them with great interest.

Yeah, no, this was definitely not intimidating Lukas. Ha.

-“I am the M-Moonjumper,” he replied, forcing an awkward smile on his lips, still attempting to appear scary. Well, he probably looked more ridiculous than anything, really, but he was trying: “I am the guardian of the Hori- Horizon, but also its prisoner for eternity. I… I have seen the birth of the universe and its end I will witness.”

-“The Horizon?” repeated the little girl, faking looking around: “Is that where we are?” she then frowned, as if she had just realized something terrible: “Wait… Does that mean I’m trapped here too?”

Oh cool, the character he was playing at was a kidnapper, fucking great. He tried not to let this thought appear on his features and continued his part of the text. Okay, so his character was a bad guy, right? Maybe… Maybe he had to sound more like one rather than just reading the lines out loud like he had done so far. He threw an anxious glance to the directors, wondering if this was a good idea- but, hell, why the fuck not? If he was forced to do this thing, then he might as well give his all! Even if just to piss MJ off, even if the latter couldn’t see him– although, this wasn’t such a bad thing, considering their skill gap. He didn’t want to be laughed at.

But this wasn’t the time for this kind of thoughts. Now was time for either impressing people… Or just utterly ridiculing himself.

Lukas approached the child with a threatening pose, looming over her and using his free hand as a claw floating above her. He did his best to keep a somewhat “sadistic” expression and continued his line, this time with more motivation and more confidence.

-“Oh, do not worry, little one… I know what it’s like to be all alone, left to rot in this place for centuries, with no one to talk to. Rest assured, you won’t suffer the same fate as I did,” he paused, leaning forward, his smile widening dangerously, and a dark chuckle leaving his mouth: “I will be there with you forever, my child. You will never, ever, be alone again…”

The girl gave him an incredulous look, and he couldn’t tell if it was faked or genuine. However, this was soon replaced by the expected fearful expression. Yeah, he would be scared if he were in that kid’s shoes…

-“You can’t trap me here!” she retorted, stepping back. The child seemed to grab an invisible object and using it to keep him at a safe distance- a weapon probably. Kinda looked like a sword, from the way she was holding it. The student followed the script and approached her again. Had he not been so insecure about his laughter, he would have probably improvised one, but, yeah, no. This was not happening.

In any case, Lukas’ “sadistic” expression disappeared as the little girl charged at him, and it was his turn to step back. Sure, it was in the script, but it was one thing to read it. It was another to actually experience it, even if it was all fake.

Breaking character seemed to be enough for the directors to put an end to the audition. The new “cut!” that echoed in the room reminded him of the current situation and an uncontrollable blush rose to his cheeks- oh fuck, he had been really carried away, what the hell… He and the little girl turned to the producers, both looking rather nervous, though for completely different reasons. Well, while he hoped this child would get the role, he wasn’t so uncertain about his own fate in that regard. Even if MJ’s personality was absolutely terrible, it was clear that the other was more experienced and more famous than he was. It would be a real mistake to keep him, a stagehand, over a skilled actor– and, anyway, why was he even thinking about that possibility? There was no way this was going to happen!

He waited with the little girl, and the two directors started to whisper with one another, giving them sideways glances that made him even more insecure. Wait, why would there be anything to discuss? He would go back to being a stagehand and the kid was going to get the role! And, if she wasn’t, then… Then he wouldn’t understand. She had everything a young actor could offer: talent, spontaneity, expressiveness…

Eventually, after what seemed to be an eternity, the two directors turned back to them. Grooves was smiling warmly to the kid and proudly announced, all while clasping his hands:

-“Good job, darling,” he praised her, a sincere impressed look in his eyes: “You got the role.”

As soon as she heard these words, the child’s lips turned into a bright smile. Pure joy could be seen on her face as she started to jump around and giggle, celebrating the announcement with great excitement. She dashed to her father and hugged him tightly, squealing with delight against him. At the sight, Lukas couldn’t help but smile, touched by the little girl’s happiness. Oh, he was glad for her, and even more so to know he had been able to help her get the job. Even if he was going to get laughed at for his poor performance, it still had some use in the end.

-“Hey, you,” his attention was caught back by the Conductor and his eyes went back to them. Oh. Right.

-“Uh, do I… Do you want me to go tell the others they can come back?” he suggested, his previous confidence flying through the window, miles and miles away. He couldn’t help but look away, not managing to keep eye contact. God, this was so stressful… His mess of a mind was silenced as he saw Grooves nudging his counterpart, a smug smile on his lips.

-“I’ll let you do the honors,” he chuckled with his deep voice, and Lukas tilted his head to the side, getting more and more confused by the whole situation. Wait, what…? No, no, no, wait…

The Conductor moved away from the other, as if disgusted by the sudden and unwanted contact- they really were alike on a lot of points, it was kind of funny to watch, though Lukas’ mind was not focused on this at the moment.

-“Fine, DJ Peckneck,” groaned the other, rubbing the place where Grooves had touched him like he was trying to get some dirt off him. His head turned back to the student and he stood up, visibly wanting to get this over with:

-“You get the role,” he merely told him, barely paying attention to him anymore: “Learn your text by tomorrow,” and just like that, the man walked with a fast pace to the door, opening it and calling everyone back inside with his loud and authoritative voice.

In the meantime, Lukas was just… Frozen, unable to process what he had just been told.

Wait.

What?

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Ahahaha, Lukas gets so fucking confused in this fanfic, this is so funny to write.

=> Chapter 06

[dhwty-writes]

Toss a Coin to your Lover

I finally cracked. After months of reading (who are we kidding, inhaling) Geraskier fanfic, I finally wrote an one-shot. What inspired me to do it was this extremely heartwrenching post by @clown-of-rivia, who kindly gave me permission to write this. And write I did! I typed half of this at 2 AM on my phone because I couldn’t sleep until the words were own and the other half in the last 3 hours. It was a lot of fun, honestly!

Best you read the post mentioned above first to know the context but basically what happened is that Geralt and Jaskier slept together and Geralt (like the absolute idiot he is) put some money on the nightstand the next morning and left (because he couldn’t imagine himself worthy of love that is not bought). Here’s what happens after. It’s angst but with a happy ending, don’t worry. Enjoy!

Read on AO3

Jaskier stared at the coins on the nightstand for a very long, probably an embarrassing long time. Alright, definitely an embarrassing long time. But in his defence, the sun had barely risen and he'd frankly had the best sex of his life - and that ought to say something - so he thought he ought to be forgiven.

He'd be very glad to say that, when reality had finally caught up to him, the first thing he'd felt was rage. Alas, that was not the case. Because despite what other people thought, despite his infamous reputation as an exceptional (and intermittent) lover, despite everything, he actually cared about sex. His flings were seldom only a fancy to sate his needs; he was genuinely, truly, deeply in love with his usual bedfellows.

And Geralt? Geralt wasn't his usual bedfellow. He wasn't anything like his usual bedfellows. Jaskier fell for people easily and had been even more prone to do so in his youth. He had been in love with Geralt from the first moment he saw him. And over the years the feelings hadn't subsided in the slightest.

He was not ashamed to say that at this point he loved Geralt with all his being. Melitele's tits, he'd spent the last two decades traipsing after the damned witcher, composing ballad after ballad to his glory and beauty and virtue and finally - finally! - he'd thought Geralt had understood.

And then-

This.

Disbelievingly he stared at the money on the bedside table.

So, naturally, Jaskier felt hurt. He wanted to curl up and cry for days as he'd done after his first heartbreak, a lovely stable hand his father had sent away after catching them in the hay.

But then- resignation. Because he'd always known. 'Death and destiny. Heroics and heartbreak.' In some way he'd even been prepared for it, as much as one can prepare for such an eventuality. But not like this. This wasn't fair, this wasn't how it had been supposed to go, his heart not only broken but shattered into a million pieces, like the beautiful painted glass vase he had broken all those years ago in the Countess de Stael's manse. Beautiful even in shambles, yet dangerous to everyone who dared touch the shards.

He exhaled forcefully, clinging to the feeling of glass cuts on his hands, clinging to the pain, the sting, the bite. Finally, the rage kicked in. That was better than heartbreak, that was something he could use as a weapon, wielding words as lethal as any sword, as sweet as honey and as beautiful as a field of poisonous buttercups.

He stuffed the coins into his purse and got up to get dressed, seething and too furious to even attempt buttoning up his doublet. It wasn't as if Geralt hadn't seen that before. He had and he had loved it and then he had thrown coins onto Jaskier's nightstand and left. The audacity!

And the audacity to just leave! Jaskier was of half a mind to not go after Geralt after all because wasn't that a pitiful sight? The great poet Jaskier in the role of the scorned lover, running after his witcher with desperate need? But then again, he was just too angry and he needed to have words with Geralt. Oh, and what words they were about to have!

'Errands to run,’ Geralt had said and Jaskier scoffed in disbelief. Because now, apparently, the witcher had gone craven, Roach and her master long gone when he peered into the stable. 'Good,' he thought, 'so he's afraid.' And he ought to be, really. Jaskier wasn't about to just stand idly by and let the love of his life leave - he had been much too persistent over the last two and a half decades for that.

So, he tightened the straps of his lute case and his bag and set out to do what he did best: Not composing or singing or giving exceptional blowjobs (although he certainly excelled at all of those tasks), no, no, no; what Jaskier did best was tracking a certain whitehaired witcher of his, no matter how little he wanted to be found.

A few pointed questions and sweet words later, he was on his way, huffing and puffing while running to match the speed of a horse and trying to compensate the head start Geralt and Roach had gotten – and praying, Melitele, please, that they hadn't galloped away because then would take days to catch up to them – yes, he spoke from experience, one of his not so fond memories from the beginning of their friendship when Geralt had still thought he could shake the bard. He had learned better quickly, though now it seemed he had forgotten the lessons learned half a lifetime ago.

Luckily, though, he hadn’t galloped away, as Jaskier caught up to him half a day's march later while he was watering Roach by a creek. Good. That was good. That meant that his white wolf wasn't completely averse to being found. Still, the sight of the peaceful tranquillity - as if nothing had happened - only fuelled his rage.

'How dare he?', he thought. 'How dare he be calm when I am furious, how dare he find peace while I am aching, how dare he hurt me and not hurt in turn?'

Oh, but that wouldn't last for long. No, Jaskier would see to that.

"Geralt!" he called even though he knew that the witcher had to be long aware of his presence. Still, he hadn't deemed it necessary to acknowledge him, not turning, not even raising his head. The nerve of this! "What errands lead you to the middle of nowhere?"

The witcher flinched and looked up, his brows furrowed. It was a look Jaskier had long learnt to identify with pain. 'Good,' he thought, although he felt a little guilty, 'he shall hurt, too. Just like I do.'

"No answer?" he asked flippantly. "Fine. Then I'll do the talking. As always. You better sit down, witcher, because we will be here for a while. And you will listen." Geralt didn't move. Fine for him.

"What the actual fuck," he began his tirade, "we're you thinking, you cursed witcher?" He flinched but Jaskier didn't care. He was bitter and battered and broken-hearted and it was Geralt’s fault!

"What do you take me for?" He shouted and dug for the coins in his purse. "Some common whore? Some- some common travelling bard who will just as easily fall into bed for some coin as fall into song?" He probably shouldn't care that much but even if he was now famous enough to normally elude such propositions- as well as the need to accept them - it still rubbed him the wrong way decades later.   

"For years I've kept you company, for years I've sung your praises. 'Toss a coin to your witcher', indeed. Here!" One by one he hurled them in Geralt's general direction. "Have some coins! Have plenty of them because trust me, I’m not wanting for money! I’m not wanting for anything, to be precise! I could easily retire to Oxenfurt to teach or to basically any court on the Continent to make a home. Easily, do you hear me? I do not need your pity! I do not need you to pay me!"  

He had run out of Geralt's coins to throw and while he could certainly bombard him with his own money, he was actually quite protective of his earnings. So, he reverted back to verbal assault: "Is that what that was to you last night? Another night of paid company you like to indulge that you could just leave behind come morning? What were you even thinking? That you could finally shake me of after years of travelling with you?"

He gasped as a terrible thought came to his mind. "Is that what it is? You try to insult me so that I finally stop following you? Because then you have succeeded, Geralt. This insult is-"

"Jaskier," Geralt said, the first time he spoke since his arrival. It sounded weak. Broken. Pleading.

"No!" he answered. "No, I'm not finished with you, yet! You humiliate me, Geralt. For years I've endorsed your terrible bedside manner but this is a step too far. Really, I'm at a loss for words! I woke up with a wonderful afterglow to see you leaving and was worried for you. Turns out I shouldn't have been because apparently this night has no impact whatsoever on you. You're as calm as- as- I don't even know! See what you do to me? I'm a poet! A minstrel! A pretty little wordsmith, yet you make my words fail me. My weapons, my craft, my only asset, my-"

"Jaskier, please," Geralt interrupted him and to his shame tears rose to Jaskier’s eyes, "I didn't want to hurt you!"

"Then why did you do it?" he yelled, choking on the tears. "Because guess what, Geralt, I'm hurt! I'm really fucking hurt!"

"I'm sorry. Last night was a mistake."

"Oh, great," he scoffed. "First you add injury to insult. But sure, why not add insult again?"

"I shouldn't have made you do this."

"Made me?" he howled. "You didn't make me do anything! Fuck, I kissed you because Melitele's tits, I've been in love with you for so long and I just couldn't take it anymore!" His voice broke on the last syllables and he pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, trying to quell the tears. "Shit-!" he croaked weakly. He hadn't meant for it to go this way, he was angry and he wanted him to feel the fury, not to crack down before him, show him his weakness, show him just how helpless he made him feel and-

He gulped down air, in a hope to stifle the violent sobs that shook his body. Oh, how he ached to curl up in a lover's embrace, to be held and comforted and yet Geralt was the one to reduce him to the blubbering mess. It was fucked up. It was so fucked up. Fucked up to run after him, fucked up to yell at him, all so very fucked up.

Still, he calmed down. Slowly. But still, he did.

When he was only sniffling a bit, he lowered his hands and found Geralt staring at him, unmoving, unblinking. Then he said: "No you're not."

"What do you mean, I'm not?"

"You're not in love with me. You can't be."

He scoffed. "Do you now claim to know my heart better than I do? Do you think I cannot judge whom I love? Do you think me an imbecile, Geralt? Incapable? Weak? Whatever it is, tell me! Better tell me now!"

"I think you are insane," he growled and Jaskier gasped, "to think yourself in love with a witcher."

"What, you absolute idiot, do you think have I been doing the last twenty-odd years? It hasn't been a deterrent all that time, so why should it be now?"

"Because you can't love me, Jaskier," he roared, the first time he had actually raised his voice at him since the djinn. "Because I am a witcher and can't love you back and demanding your affection would not be fair!"

"Denying it is equally unfair!"

Geralt growled and turned away, obviously displeased by something though Jaskier couldn't tell what it was.

He was still angry and he wanted to continue yelling, yell how Geralt paying him wasn't fair, how Geralt leaving him wasn't fair, how- But somewhere in his rage-clouded mind a voice of reason spoke up, granting surprising clarity for just a moment.

He clung to that clear thought as if for dear life, letting the fury dissipate until he was thinking again, and not just feeling and hurting. "Geralt," he said cautiously now, "why did you pay me?"

The witcher scoffed and ducked his head. "I had to pay you something, didn't I?" he mumbled almost too quietly for Jaskier to hear. "I mean, you were expecting something. No-one would bed a witcher without- without recompensation."

Jaskier stared at him abhorred. "Why on earth would you think that?" he asked with disgust dripping into his voice.

"Because it's always been like this!" he answered exasperated. "Women love me only for the money and even then, they cannot look at me while taking me to bed. Yen could, but-" He winced. "The djinn- And you, Jaskier. You don't have anything like that. But I had to give you something. I could never ask a sacrifice like that of something without-" Jaskier watched with astonishment as the witcher's voice broke. "What else do I have to offer you?"

"What- what else would do you have to offer me?" Jaskier gasped and spluttered trying - and failing - to find any words.

He just grunted and took Roach by the reins as if he was about to walk away - again.

"No!" He stepped in and ripped the reins out of his hands. "No, you do not get to flee! You stay and listen to what I have to say." He just stared, watching the bard as he started pacing. "What do you have to offer me, Geralt?" He asked bristled. "Why, what indeed? It isn't as if you have made me famous, ensuring my wealth and livelihood. It isn't as if you've saved my life countless of times, putting yourself in harm’s way right from the very beginning when you didn't even know - or like - me. It isn't as if you listen to my endless ramblings, as if you replace my lute strings when I need to, as if you lend me your coat when I'm freezing or carry my bag when I'm tired. It isn't as if you've nursed me back to health after illness and injury alike. It isn't as if you've rendered me completely speechless last night. No, none of that has ever happened."

He ducked his head. "That's nothing."

"That's everything."

His head snapped up. "Well, I'm still a witcher!" he shouted but Jaskier didn't flinch nor waver.

"And when have I ever cared about that?" he shouted back. "My love for your mind and soul and heart has been free for as long as I know you. Why would you think that my love for your body wouldn't be?"

"You mean it," Geralt said his voice full of surprise.

"Of course, I do, you big dumb oaf! That's what I've been trying to tell you for the past half hour. What else am I supposed to do to convince you that you are worthy of love and softness and care? What else am I supposed to do to show you that I've been giving you all of this for half of my life without asking anything in return? I never needed to ask! I've been paid in turn thousandfold. Not in money, Geralt, in actions big and small. I thought-" He choked on his tears, "I thought I've been paid in love, too."

"Witchers can't love. Witchers can't feel at all."

"Stop telling yourself that lie. I've known you for twenty years, Geralt. When you're happy you smile, when you think I'm funny you huff a laugh, when you're angry you shout, when you're sad you shut me out and when you're hurt you lick your wounds. You hide it, of course, but you haven't been able to hide it from me for a long time. And I know you love people. You love your brothers and Vesemir and you love Yennefer in some way and Ciri, too. And I think you love me, too. Don't hide your love, witcher. Not from me. Never from me. You're just scared. A coward. Scared to get hurt and scared to hurt me."

"I'm not craven," he growled.

"No?" Jaskier crossed his arms. "Prove it."

Geralt looked at him quizzically. Jaskier raised an eyebrow. A challenge. An invitation. A plea. And just like that, Jaskier could see the witcher break. It was plain as day, the little crack in the facade, the little gleam in the eyes and then, suddenly, he was being kissed.

There was a desperate sob caught in Geralt's throat when they kissed, the anguish and agony overwhelming Jaskier and making him stumble a few paces back. Geralt kissed as if he'd never kissed before, frantic and fierce and forlorn, as if he feared that Jaskier would pull away, as if he waited for eventual rejection, revulsion, rebuke.

And that broke Jaskier's heart again, maybe even more so than the coin. No, Geralt could have paid him all the coin in the world and it wouldn't have hurt half as much as the onslaught of- of- decades of loneliness and loathing and longing that choked him.

He was still angry - he was sure that he would continue being angry and hurt for quite some time - but that didn't matter right now. Right now, all that mattered what that he loved Geralt. And his beloved witcher, his dear white wolf, his revered companion, friend, lover was hurting, too. Because he hadn't been able to even imagine being worthy of the affection Jaskier gave him so readily, so freely, so effortlessly. Oh, and how much affection he had to give!

He raised his hands gently to cup his cheeks, wiping the tears away with both his thumbs and leaned into the kiss. The desperation faded away, as did the agony, to be replaced with tenderness and love. He reached for Geralt's hands to place them on his hips, whispering quietly between kisses: "It's okay, it's alright. Hold me, embrace me, I've got you." He placed a tender hand on Geralt's chest, manoeuvring them until they reached some rocks beside the creek to sit down on. He cradled his witcher into his lap, carding his fingers through his hair and kissed him, wishing that he never had to stop, hoping to pour all the unsaid words, all the undelivered confessions, all the unsung ballads (that he definitely did not have ready, no) into the slow movements of their lips.

When Geralt pulled away and leaned their foreheads against each other he was almost disappointed. "I'm sorry," he said, "I'm sorry, Jaskier, I'm so sorry, I never meant- I never meant for any of this, I never meant to hurt you, to insult you, to- I just don't- I don't know how to- I want to make this good, make this good for you, and-"

"Shhhh," he made soothingly. "I know. I know, my love, my witcher, my dear heart. And I forgive you. You know I always do."

"I don't deserve-"

He pressed a finger to his lips. "No," he declared. "None of this nonsense anymore. I've yelled my throat sore trying to convince you otherwise. What else am I supposed to do to prove it?"

"Kiss me again," he begged, "A thousand times. Maybe I'll start to believe it then."

To his own surprise, Jaskier laughed. "That, my dear, I can do." He pecked him on the lips. "One," he said. "Nine-hundred-and-ninety-nine to go."

To his even bigger astonishment Geralt of Rivia, the witcher, the white wolf, smiled. Widely. "Hmm," he made. "I think I like that. Do it again?"

He did. "Two."

That earned him a quiet chuckle and a quivering sigh. "I love you," Geralt whispered. "I really do."

Jaskier smiled, too. "I know. I love you, too."

He buried his face in the crook of his neck and Jaskier's breath hitched. "I'm not good at showing it yet," Geralt said and Jaskier had to keep himself from squirming at the tickling sensation. "I'm shit at showing it. I can't promise you that I won't hurt you again. I've never done something like this before. But I will try. For you. Anything for you."

"Oh, my love," he sighed, his heart beating quicker. "And what a wonderful adventure that will be. A tale of love and woe, of-"

"-death and destiny?" Geralt interrupted him and looked at him, a sly smile on his lips. "Heroics and heartbreak?"

Jaskier gasped. "You remember!"

"Of course, I do. I never forget anything important." He opened his mouth to protest and Geralt quickly spoke: "Do you think it is a story worthy of a ballad?"

His expression went soft and his heart warmed. "No, Geralt," he said and kissed him again. "This is the stuff of an epos. In a thousand years they will still tell legends of our love. There will be novels and plays and songs, and- oh Geralt, I love you, so much it hurts."

The witcher pulled him close. “I love you, too. I love you even if I don’t show it. I love your singing, your dramatics, your fancies. I love that your hair is soft and that your body is unscarred and that your hands are always gentle. I love that you never smell of fear. And I still can’t believe any of this.”

Jaskier smiled and kissed him again. “Three,” he announced.

“Do it again?”

He laughed. “Always.” And so, he did. A thousand kisses and a thousand more. To make his witcher believe. To make his witcher stay. To love his witcher.

Because he always had. Jaskier, Julian Alfred Pankratz, Viscount of Lettenhove, strolling minstrel, master poet, bard loved Geralt of Rivia, the Witcher, the White Wolf, the Butcher of Blaviken since the moment he had first laid eyes on him. And now he got to show it to. Now he received love in turn. And in the end, that was all that mattered.