#except for the last line but I had to

[gece-misin-nesin]

From my family line...

Dabi | Todoroki Touya

BNHA/Family Line - Conan Gray

[psychomusic]

so. I've been reading some posts on the jedi order tag AND i won't talk about my opinion on "are jedi good or bad discourse" BUT i wanna point out some lore to everyone who's complaining about the jedi taking kids into their order: (in the EU) it wasn't always like this.

if you take swtor era (more than 3000 years before the prequels) there were many jedi who joined at an older age. like, for example there was a guy who broke his engagement to become one. most jedi remember their families because they were old enough when they decided to go.

THEN in darth bane's book trilogy (circa 1000 yesrs before the prequels) there is a passage where two sith lords are talking about taking bane, already an adult, to study at korriban. one doubted him because he was too old, ans the other told him he sounded like a jedi, and that ONE DAY jedi will have to accept only kids into their ranks if they really want to find "pure" people that can learn their lessons quicker.

one day!! so it wasn't always like that!! the ongoing wars with the sith, who corrupted and killed many of them, had pressured them into taking always younger people into their ranks.

also, consider a thing that this video explains super well: training to become a jedi is not like exercising, because there is a transformative lesson at the end of the training that changes everything. you can't just do as much as you can, but not finish.

the transformative lesson, as the video explains, is that through the force, everything is the same - from rocks and ships to life and death. at the end of the training you have to understand this fundamental truth.

yoda says "you have to unlearn what you have learned". during times where they were constantly killed off or corrupted by the dark side (and if you haven't learned this lesson you are more susceptible to this corrupting), younger people were taken in to actually finish their training (a training that was ultimately about being a good person AND that you could leave at any point if you weren't sold on that, too)

(remember that for the sith failure = death. like. that was the alternative for force sensitive kids. it's not like sith had any moral problem with taking kids away without consent. sith don't have moral problems: they believe that them being stronger in the force means they can do whatever they want as long as their strong enough to go and do it. there are MANY passages in many different star wars stories, even in different mediums, that say this out loud)

AND (this is more of a critical thought than just stating the lore) the fact that they started doing it out of necessity doesn't mean it's 100% good BUT you know. the whole set up of the prequels is that we're starting off the story in a period of crisis and decadence all around. most of the systems of the times were about to fall. OF COURSE they had problems. if they didn't, we wouldn't have the story to begin with.

that doesn't automatically mean jedi = bad and sith are better, tho. you wouldn't take the last, chaotic and decadent period to jugde something, would you? it's like deciding that the athenian democracy sucked because people at the times of Demosthenes failed at recognizing the new schemes in which the world was evolving into, and still believed that their city would be important as it had been in the previous century. They just didn't fucking expect the Macedons would conquer half the world known and more, and have the subsequent political power. Still, their experiences in the 5th century with democracy were very good, even better than ours on many fronts, if you contextualize a little. the jedi had flaws, and most importantly, they didn't fucking know the future and everything that ever happened, ever, so they made mistakes. that doesn't automatically make the system ill, or bad, or not-working. systems can have setbacks when the world changes. (just like athenian democracy had one when they lost the empire that was funding the democracy. they even had a tyranny for a while and then fixed the problems. that doesn't diminish retrospectively their democracy)

[danielnelsen]

well that's just a lie

[halffizzbin]

I've been watching old Project Runway episodes and my take is: whatever they were paying the fat models to participate in the "real woman" challenges just so the contestants could throw dramatic fits over how much they despise fat bodies? It was not enough.

[ty-bayonet-betteridge]

3l!grian is frequently depicted as a tragic figure and sometimes i wonder if we even watched the same series

[luckykero]

follow up to the last one

[thebirdandhersong]

alas babes I literally cannot defend this man's name anymore except in the name of ignorance which. you can only claim ignorance for so long

[flovverworks]

gah.....manga akira...i miss u..............

[shima-draws]

Me, sketching out charm designs: Fun!! Ehe! So fun!!

Me, lining charm designs: Why did god put me on this earth. Why was I put here only to suffer. Such a cruel fate has befallen me

Me, coloring and shading charm designs: Fun!! Ehe! So fun!!!

[theygender]

Apparently my job incorrectly changed my state on my W4 without my knowledge or consent last year and now I owe a LOT of money in unpaid state taxes since they weren't withholding them from my paycheck like they were supposed to 😭

[pussymasterdooku]

another day another medical malpractice…the allie experience!

[faithfromanewperspective]

see the thing about the way people are freaking out about a certain celebrity actually having boundaries and acting as if it’s part of the job to just. not—all that tells me is you don’t want celebs to be human and god forbid they’re like. disabled or neurodivergent or something because there’s no way people are going to agree that yes they need accommodations that’s a pretty bare minimum thing to have so they can keep doing their job. no the fact is there’s people out there who don’t care if our performers die as long as they can exploit them and too many fans, who don’t even get a cent out of it, are not only encouraging that behaviour but acting that we are, too, entitled to what our faves should not ever have to give. and the fact is you don’t need to know the personal reasons behind their boundaries. you will get more from your faves if the collective fandom treats them with respect that’s an obvious fact and yet. people still don’t let that change their behaviour

[avirael]

Lifeline

From one second to the next everything had faded to darkness with a blinding flash of light. The manic laughter piercing all of his thoughts and his own desperate and panicked screams. The destruction around them and his friends strained faces. Even all his pain and fears. From one moment to the other it was all gone. All that was left was dead silence and a bottomless darkness, into which he sank deeper and deeper. A sea of nothingness that swallowed him.

It was impossible to tell how long he had drifted through this darkness, not thinking and not knowing whether he was still alive or already dead - not caring even - , when a sound reached him. A faint voice, far… far away.

"Please wake up…"

"I can’t loose you too…"

It sounded so familiar. He was certain he knew it but names and faces had turned to such a faded unknowable thing in this blackness. He wasn’t even sure he remembered who he was himself or how he got here. But then there was this sad, familiar voice and he just knew he could trust it. Like his personal lifeline, his beacon of light, it lead his mind out of the darkness, that threatened to drown him.

***

As his eyes slowly fluttered open, his eyelids still feeling so horribly heavy, it was early morning. The sun shone through the window at the other side of the room and it was almost to bright to bear. His whole body felt stiff and sour as if he had been turned stone and was only slowly regaining his ability to move. His mind, as if clouded with fog, tried to make sense of where he was and how he got here.

Carefully he looked around. He remembered this place. It meant a lot to him but it still felt like a name he couldn’t quite remember although it was on the tip of his tongue. Then his eyes fell on a redhaired Miqo’te, asleep at his bedside, face half buried in his arms resting on the edge of the bed. A’viloh.

No!

All at once everything was there again. The fog blown away, unveiling all the horror that had led him here. He started to shake and squeezed his eyes shut. Panicked he tried to guard his thoughts, his feelings as good as he could, but then he realised that he was alone. Not the Miqo’te at his bedside, not in this room. Alone in his head, in his own body. Just himself. The intruder that had tortured him all this time was gone.

He let out a shaky deep breath and returned his gaze to the person sleeping by his side once again. He was alright. He hoped they all were. How had they managed to free him from this presence that had locked him up inside the deepest corner of his own mind? Not unconscious, no. Screaming and struggling, awake enough so he could feel the monster rummaging through every single one of his thoughts and memories, mocking him at every given opportunity. Mostly conscious as well as seeing and hearing but unable to speak up or stop himself. A fate he wouldn’t even wish on his worst enemies. The memory alone made him shiver again.

A’viloh, he realised it had been his voice he had heard, lost in the darkness. How long had the Miqo’te spent here talking to him? And why would he do something like this after all the trouble he had caused? He looked so peaceful like this. A far cry from the last time he remembered seeing his face, bruised and almost defeated. Back then he had feared the shadow controlling him would make his threats true and claw out all of his friends hearts or slowly choke them with his own hands. All he could think back then had been Please, not him too…

But A’viloh was alright. Thank the Twelve. Slowly he raised one of his arms and carefully brushed a strand of long red hair out of his sleeping face. But his shaky hand didn’t yet move as precisely as it used to and so the Miqo’te noticed the slight touch.

His face twitched and slowly he opened his eyes. All of a sudden that peaceful expression was gone. Replaced by an unmistakable deep sadness. Why did he look so sad? Without thinking he raised his hand again and gently caressed the Miqo’te’s cheek. But A’viloh flinched from the unexpected touch and hastily looked up. Accompanied by a sharp inhale of breath his slitted pupils dilated as his eyes fixed on the other one‘s face and his mind visibly raced to make sense of what he saw.

"Thancred…?", he whispered almost inaudibly with confusion written all over his face. There was an uncertainty to his voice Thancred couldn’t assess yet.

"Please don’t tell me you expected someone else…", he joked and tried to sit up. It was a mean joke, even to his own ears. But joking was his natural reaction when he didn’t know what else to say or when he was too scared to speak aloud how he truly felt.

A’viloh gasped. It was not quite a laugh but his mouth twitched into a bright smile for a second. "Thancred!", he repeated slightly louder as his eyes filled with tears. "You're awake!" Quickly he jumped up and threw his arms around the hyurs neck. His chair flew to the floor with a loud clattering sound that echoed back from the stone walls of the room. Thancred could feel the Miqo’te tremble and also the tears on his cheek as it brushed his own skin for a moment. "I thought I lost you..."

Suddenly A‘viloh gasped again and jumped back just as fast as he had thrown himself at him mere seconds before. He looked surprised by his own words, maybe he hadn’t meant to say that out loud. His face turned red and embarrassed he looked away. "I’m sorry…"

Oh no!, Thancred thought. Not him! That’s a horrible idea.

During his training he had learned to read people as if they were books. Just that books always had seemed boring to him in comparison. It was a useful skill for a spy to be able to see through his opponents, to be able to tell when they were lying or hiding something. But if A’viloh was trying to hide anything he didn’t do it very well…

It was a horrible decision to fall in love with Thancred Waters. A fact the Hyur suddenly got painfully aware of. People occasionally did that. Sometimes he wanted them to, if it was for a job and for example there was an information he needed. Sometimes it just happened without him planning to. On rare occasions he even felt bad about it, because all of them so far had ended up sad and disappointed. Because in the end he never had returned their feelings.

For some reason it bothered him that easily flustered, involuntarily funny, kind-hearted A’viloh might share this fate. He didn’t deserve that. The Miqo’te had helped save him, when it would have been easier to just kill him for sure. He had already endured enough because of Thancred’s mistakes, since people around him had the tendency to get hurt. But most importantly he considered him a friend.

For a short moment, back before the Ascian had hijacked his body, the idea had seemed interesting to Thancred. The Miqo’te’s shy and easily embarrassed nature had undeniably seemed cute to him, a strange contrast to the strength he possessed but didn’t seem aware of, and in a moment of selfishness Thancred had found himself offering an invitation with questionable intentions. But fate had different plans. It wouldn’t have been fair. Because he certainly would have ended up breaking the poor guys heart. Somehow that idea scared him.

Speechlessly Thancred stared at him, trying to find the right words. To convince him not to make such a grave mistake. And equally speechless A’viloh avoided his gaze. He already had said too much.

For a moment no one dared to speak.

Then another familiar voice sounded from the hallway.

"A’vi? Is everything alright? I heard a noise that sounded like something had --", Rael appeared in the doorframe and instantly fell silent as they saw Thancred sitting upright and awake in his bed. For a split second the Viera’s eyes wandered to dumbstruck A’viloh before returning to him, a polite smile forming on their face, which the hyur easily recognised as nothing more than that, a studied politeness.

"Thancred. You’re awake.", they observed calmly. "How are you feeling?"

Before he could answer, the Miqo’te regained his voice. "I’m sorry…", A’viloh repeated and then wordlessly left the room in bit too much of a hurry to not look strange.

For a second they both stared after him. Then Rael sighed and shook their head. "I will get Y’shtola or Urianger if that’s alright with you…"

"Of course.", Thancred nodded and Rael left as quickly as they had appeared.

The room felt very silent and empty all of the sudden. It would take a while to get used to being alone with his thoughts again. But as he sat there wondering how to fix this situation with A’viloh he could vividly imagine that spiteful, mocking voice again.

Good job, lover boy. Look at what you’ve done…

[blessedmoonsoul]

kimmel's ugly ass crying just annoyed the hell out of me libs are so fucking irritating

[merlinmerlot]

I could play one of the most beautiful well crafted video games on the planet and it will never be as appealing to me as one that kind of sucks shit but has soooo much potential

[wander-wren]

HOLY SHIT I ALMOST FORGOT

it is the first day of november and so, today, someone will die.

even under the brightest sun, the frigid autumn sea is all the colors of the night: dark blue and black and brown. i watch the ever-changing patterns in the sand as its pummeled by countless hooves.

they run the horses on the beach, a pale road between the black water and the chalk cliffs. it is never safe, but it is never so dangerous as today, race day.

this time of year, i live and breathe the beach. my cheeks feel raw with the wind throwing sand against them, my thighs sting from the friction of the saddle, and my arms ache from holding up two thousand pounds of horse. i have forgotten what it is like to be warm and what a full night’s sleep feels like and what my name sounds like spoken instead of shouted across yards of sand.

i am so, so alive.

as i head down the cliffs with my father, a race official stops us. he says, “sean kendrick, you are ten years old. you haven’t discovered it yet, but there are more interesting ways to die than on this beach.”

my father takes the official’s upper arm as if the man were a restless horse. they have a brief exchange about age restrictions during the race. my father wins.

on the way down to the water, we are jostled and pushed by men and by horses. a gray uisce stallion rears up, its rider jerked at the end of a lead. i slide beneath it and find myself facing the sea, surrounded on all sides by the capaill uisce—the water horses.

they are every color of the pebbles on the beach—blue, black, red, gold, gray, brown. riders hang bridles with ribbons and flowers to lessen the danger of the dark november sea, but i wouldn’t trust a handful of petals to save my life. last year, a horse trailing red tassels and daises tore a man’s arm half from his body.

they are beautiful and deadly, loving us and hating us.

[…]

i don’t often think of my father strung out amongst the frothing surf. instead, i think of him as he was before the race: afraid.

i won’t make the same mistake.