#everytime I remember ‘just another sign’ my blood BOILS

[zeb-z]

Leo leaving more concrete, tons of it, all at the titan, outside of every building in Roier’s city, and Bad and Bagi check everywhere but the dragon. Jaiden knowing she’s been an odd egg out, and Roier falling apart at the loss of his sister, and Forever saying it’s “just another sign” finding her message, and Mouse going as far as to say Foolish doesn’t care Leo’s gone, and I cannot take it anymore I’m at my limit

[morayoflight]

JADE BUTLER SIGN ME UP-

Okay but listen. It’s only a matter of time before reader and Jade start pinning for one another. But how would Jade react to some rando trying to court reader during a fancy party? Like trying to ask them to dance when they’re clearly not comfortable?

Ofc feel free to ignore this but thank you for reading :))

Hi anon! Thank you for requesting this! Somehow, I ended up writing an entire fic instead of just headcanons. I hope that's okay TvT

Butler!Jade reacts to someone trying to court the reader

*Gender-neutral terms for reader are used

Synopsis: You attend an acquaintance's party with Jade and someone happens to have their eye on you

Word Count: 1437

----

Jade may be your butler, but he also performs a multitude of roles for you-- one of them is being your chaperone to parties such as this. 

If you were allowed to be honest, you weren't excited about this party at all. It was something you had to attend out of courtesy, trying to keep up the family image, yada yada. 

So, you chose to loiter in corners with Jade instead. 

Jade, with that ever so pleasant smile of his, follows you everywhere like a dog leashed to his master. He would, from time to time, lean down and whisper to you the names and titles of the other lords and ladies who wished to extend their greetings. 

You couldn't care less about those people, so you never remembered them. Jade knew this day would come, so he took it upon himself to memorize basic information on every single person you've met in the parties you've attended in the past. 

Honestly, where would you be without him? 

Jade practically knew everyone in the room, and that is why his vision dimmed when he spotted a certain lord walking towards your direction 

"Ah, a wonderful evening, (Name)! It is a fancy meeting you here," the man says, taking your hand to place a kiss on top of it. You were laughing albeit nervously, trying to be polite, but Jade caught the way your body tensed up a bit. 

Oh, how badly he wanted to drag you away from this situation. Alas, he was just a mere butler and could not risk tarnishing your honor all because of a servant's misconduct. He does value his reputation only for your sake. 

Instead, his smile grew wider when the lord sent a nonchalant nod of acknowledgement to his direction. It was the kind of close-eyed smile he did whenever he was cooking up sinister plans in his head. 

The lord in question was none other than a bothersome man who has been relentlessly pursuing you ever since that one party weeks ago. 

He has sent you many things. From flowers, to lengthy romantic letters and lavish gifts, Jade has seen them all and he could not be more than happy enough to throw them out for you everytime you exhaled a big sigh and asked for them to be removed.

"Have you been standing here like a wallflower all this time? Have some fun! Here, why don't we dance?" the lord offers a hand to you, clearly expecting that you would indulge his invitation. 

Instead, you stared at his open palm, and fiddled with your own hands. 

"L-look, my lord, I am terribly sorry but I don't think I can--" 

"Nonsense! It has been so long since I last gazed upon you. You will grant me the honor of spending a fraction of your night with you, yes?" He completely cut your words off, grabbing your hand and prepared to drag you off to the dance floor. Now this was exactly your problem with this suitor, he is most assertive and inconsiderate.

Your head immediately spun to Jade, eyes screaming for help. 

How. dare. he. 

This abominable swine. 

This display of utter disrespect to his master set Jade's blood at boiling point that with one swift movement, he came between you and this poor excuse of a gentleman. 

Jade's gentle hands are on your shoulders, his back facing the man as he blocks you from eyesight with his tall stature. Looking back at the young lord, Jade smiles again. 

"I apologize, my lord. My master has been feeling unwell." 

The man raises an eyebrow suspiciously as he tries to peer at you past your butler. 

"They seemed fine to-" 

"My goodness! (Name), you are looking a bit flushed. Here, let me check your temperature," Jade exclaims, his voice laced with worry and concern, and maybe a bit of exaggerated dramatization. But it was enough to baffle the man who staggered back in confusion. 

Jade removes a glove and places his bare hand on your forehead, giving him an excuse to lean down and come closer to your ear. He starts whispering abruptly. 

"Pretend to faint. Now, if you will excuse me," 

Before you could even ask him what was going on, Jade discreetly trips your leg with his foot and you find yourself falling to his arms. Remembering what he'd whispered, you close your eyes shut and pray that your acting was just as good as your butler's. 

"(Name)! A-are they alright?" The man frantically shuffles closer, but Jade heaves you into his arms and faces the other direction before the young lord could even touch you. 

"They will be fine, my lord. Perhaps the party’s atmosphere is starting to weigh down on them. I truly do apologize, but I need to take my master home. I worry for their health, you see" Jade sighed, his eyebrows creased with pretend concern as he cradles you closer to his chest. 

The man coughs and straightens his back. 

"O-of course! I value their health too. Yes, do see to it that they are returned home safely. Then, I shall head back.”

Oh, how unreliable, Jade thought. This young lord could only pretend to be dignified but can do no good for his master. He did not even ask to come and escort them out. If he was so worried, he would at least want to send off the person he is so romantically interested in?

As expected of a failed, incompetent gentleman. 

Men who are shaken by the slightest of troubles do not deserve a place in his master's life or heart. They would not be able to protect such a precious existence.

“Ah, before I forget…” Jade starts, halting the lord’s receding steps.

He meets the man’s eyes with a cold, unfeeling stare. Jade’s heterochromatic irises tore through the young lord’s gaze. A predator assessing its prey, preparing to lunge. It was enough to send shivers down the latter’s spine.  

“My master possesses a kind and fragile heart, and I often find this to be a weakness but–”

Jade pauses, feeling a slight pinch in the middle of his stomach just where your hand rested. How fond, he thought, sending you a second-long loving gaze before fixating an even more hostile glare at the young lord. His soul must certainly be terrified now.

“Allow me to say this in their stead. They would very much prefer it if you kept your distance from them. No, in fact, this is my suggestion: please refrain from contacting my master for the rest of your life, for your sake.”

Satisfied with himself, Jade smiles and politely bids the stunned, trembling lord a good night. 

Indeed, it was always fun disposing of hindrances for his master.

It was not only until the coast was clear, and you had been placed safely inside the carriage did you crack one eyelid open. 

Jade  claps his hands, his smile a pleasant one. 

"Splendid acting, my lady/lord." 

You rolled your eyes and shifted in your seat. 

"Please, I merely pretended to faint. It was you who did all the work, so thank you, Jade." 

"I am humbled by your words," Jade places a hand to his chest, bowing his head slightly. 

But still, so much for a party. You wanted to wait for dessert and it was the entire reason why you stuck around for so long. How disappointing. 

Jade, ever so attentive, sensed your low spirits and cleared his throat to get your attention. 

"For tonight's dessert after dinner, we will have (favorite dessert)." 

It was exactly the thing you have been waiting for at the party. You stared at him in surprise and started laughing. 

"Ah, really. What will I do without such a competent butler? This is why I like you, Jade!" 

Your butler smiled, not hiding how pleased he is by your sentiment. 

"I like you too." 

"What?" Your laughter died in a split-second and you stared at Jade with your eyes too wide and mouth agape.

Jade snickered. Mischief glimmered in his eyes at the sight of his lovely master looking like a deer caught in headlights. He does enjoy teasing you once in a while. 

He certainly wasn't taking advantage of the fact that you were so forgiving and lenient towards him. 

"For being an easily pleased and easily flustered master, that is. Fufu. I do enjoy simple people." 

Heat traveled up from your neck to your ears. Out of embarrassment or anger, you didn't know. But you swore you looked as red as a tomato right now. 

"Jade!" 

But maybe, just maybe, your loyal butler meant every single word after all.

[kurosara]

Hongjoong x Reader

I didn’t proofread this or anything. I just wrote some middle of the night comfort I needed. 

Angst, sad

I felt my spine unconsciously shiver as yet another cool breeze fluttered heavily past me. A quick glance at my phone told me it was nearing 3 in the morning. The dim light of the screen faded, as my eyes cast back to the bare sky. It was a new moon tonight, and there weren’t many stars out either. There wasn’t anything interesting in the chilly fall weather, unless you counted the never slowing raindrops falling down my cheeks.

Why was I even crying again?

I couldn’t remember. I’d been crying that long. It hadn’t felt like it, but I’ve been sitting on the balcony of my bedroom, suffering in the chilled air, for nearly 6 hours. How long could such an overwhelming feeling last?

An eternity…

A cynical voice taunted me further with evasive thoughts similar to this. It’s dark, and lonely. I’ve whispered curses and wishes to no one. I’ve replied to… no one. Because all I could wonder was if anyone was really listening. The neatly decorated interior, fit with (f/c) furniture and various art pieces and large photos of me and my boyfriend hanging on the wall, felt eerily cruel the moment I walked in. The fleeting thought of my boyfriend stuck for a moment, like the breath hitching in my throat as I visualized his soft smile, a bit of nervousness from smiling at me for the very first time. The happy thought turned sour, the smile fading into a blank stare.

“I’ll be home late…”

The image dissipated with his words. I could barely taste the remnants of the ramen bowl I’d forced down before coming out onto the balcony. The taste was bitter and dry as I forcefully swallowed the growing lump of anxiety. My fingernails, or rather the remaining nubs since I’d chewed off all my nails earlier, felt sticky as they scratched nervously at the cold concrete I was sitting on. I could only assume it was blood from the scraping contact. The balcony’s railing taunted me similar to bars of a jail cell. But at least in prison there are other people.

But here? In this dark and lonely space I created for myself? There is no one. I’ve self-isolated. And every attempt to escape has never been followed through. If I unlocked my phone you’d see the contact pulled up where I’ve nearly called him. And before that a lengthy text that boiled down to one thing; I need you. The text was never sent of course. However, even now as I describe these feelings and sensations, I don’t feel them. They aren’t processed in my mind or my physical body. I simply sat in the corner of the balcony, knees pulled to my chest, staring into pure dark, as my body and the world continued past my racing thoughts of how this is where I should be.

I deserved to be alone.

Keys jingled in the background and it was painfully obvious the individual tried being quiet, but it wouldn’t matter. He could’ve kicked the door in screaming, and I wouldn’t budge an inch.

Hongjoong removed his shoes and hung up his coat on the nearby rack. His bag made a soft sound as he tried to gently slide it onto the couch, hoping his partner was sleeping peacefully, and trying not to disturb that. As he typically did when he ended up home this late, he trekked to the kitchen for a bottle of water to carry to bed. As he exited the kitchen, a cold breeze caught his attention.

Where’s that coming from?

Just like Hongjoong. He knew how much I hated being the slightest bit cold, so the house was always a warm temperature. He narrowed his eyes slightly as he gazed around the empty living room, noticing the cracked balcony door. Cautiously, he approached the door, peering out just the slightest bit and hoping there was no intruder lurking around.

Though he’d really hoped for that to be the case right now versus the sight he was met with.

His eyes barely made out my trembling figure in the corner, huddled against the wall. Immediately Hongjoong turned on the outdoor light and rushed to my side, carefully kneeling beside me.

“Y-y/n?” The worry was so thick in his voice, yet sweet. Like honey.

There he was. My boyfriend. Acknowledging my presence as he always does, yet I hadn’t heard a word. There was no light, though he very clearly turned one on. For a moment Hongjoong panicked. His eyes worriedly scanned my body, searching for any signs of hurt or reason for my being like this. He saw the bloody fingers and the tears still flowing. He knew what was happening, for sadly he’d seen it too many times even before they were dating. At least more times than I’d like. By now though, Hongjoong knew almost how to help. He adjusted his position to sit in front of me, his knees pulled up like mine. He touched his knees to mine, gently pulling my hands from the concrete as he rubbed soothing circles with his thumbs.

I felt the tingling of sensation from the touch, still all I saw was a never ending tunnel of darkness. Hongjoong brought my knuckles to his lips, placing gentle kisses on them before resting them onto our knees. His thumbs didn’t stop caressing the top of my hands as he simply stared into my eyes and mustered the kindest smile he could as he looked at my broken state.

“I know you probably won’t process what I’m saying right now, and that’s alright. Just focus on my voice ok?” He took a shaky breath, feeling his own tears well up, “You’ve been having a hard time lately haven’t you? I know you’ve been eating well and everything because I’ve seen it, but that doesn’t mean you’re alright. And it’s ok to not be ok. It’s not your fault.”

There was a flicker of light, like a shooting star passing across my vision. I swallowed another lump, feeling a bit of warmth from the original tingling sensation.

Hongjoong squeezed my hands, trying to urge warmth into your shivering body. Just the thought of how long you could’ve been freezing made him sick to his stomach. Nonetheless he continued to talk as calmly as he could.

“Just remember that there is someone here for you. I know you don’t always believe that, but it’s true. I am here. Right here.” A single tear rolled down his cheek unwillingly. “I’ll help you pick up the pieces you feel are broken and hold them together for you. I’ll be here to hold you steady when you’re shaking and keep you warm when you’re cold. I’m sorry I was late this time. There’s no telling how long you’ve been here.” Another tear. “But I’m here now baby. I love you.” He squeezed my hands gently once more.

Like a thread, his words formed a silver lining in the dark tunnel. My vision corrupted from pure black, to blurry shapes and images. The feeling of being frozen to my core was slowly warming in the places where his body touched mine. And finally, his beautiful, kind smile. So bright, and such a contrast to the dark space I’d been suffering in. There was a soft ringing that slowly got louder, as I realized his lips were moving. Hongjoong was speaking, yet I could only hear the ringing. Hongjoong saw the way my eyes scanned his face just the smallest bit. His smile grew a bit.

“There you are. It’s ok. Take your time.” He leaned forward, never breaking eye contact as he kissed the back of my hands lovingly.

I squeezed his hands gently, the feeling, or void of feeling, was quickly fading, and in its place a crushing weight on my throat and lungs. My chest heaved at my increased breathing pace, worrying Hongjoong as he realized the anxiety was setting in more than the previous emptiness. Without releasing my hands, he scooted to sit beside me. He let go of one hand to wrap his arm around my shoulder, leaving a gentle kiss on my temple as he whispered sweet nothings.

His voice trickled in like a small river, every other word registering before his kindness fully processed. My beating heart didn’t slow, but it became easier to breathe as I buried my head in the crook of his neck silently. He pulled me closer with one arm, resting his forehead on my hair.

“Do you want to go inside and get under the blankets?” The first full sentence I’d registered in my mind.

I absentmindedly nodded, but before I could attempt to move, Hongjoong was picking me up bridal style, careful like I was an expensive glass or diamond jewelry. Once in our shared bedroom, he placed me on the bed before tossing back the covers and tucking them around me like a child. With a reassuring smile he left the room. Although I knew where he was going, I gripped the covers tightly anxiously waiting for his return.

In a matter of minutes Hongjoong returned with two cups of hot chocolate with small marshmallows, and a pack of hershey’s kisses tucked under his arm too. He set one cup down and offered me the other, which I had to fumble from under the covers to shakily take the cup. The warm liquid felt comforting, with just a splash of caramel the way I loved it. A soft melody played as Hongjoong connected to the bluetooth speaker on the dresser, playing soft instrumentals he had been working on the days prior. Hongjoong climbed into the bed, careful of me and my drink, and opened the chocolates, feeding me one as he grabbed his own drink.

He took the drink gently from me, and pulled a small first aid kit from his pocket, beginning to tend to my wounded fingers. He tried to be as gentle as possible, though I couldn’t stop the involuntary flinching everytime there was direct contact to the broken skin. He continued mumbling soft apologies and comforting words nonetheless. Once he finished wrapping my fingers, he continued with his early motion of serving me my drink and feeding me hershey kisses.

I’m not sure how long we sat like that. Hongjoong rested his head against the headboard, one hand gently playing with strands of my hair, while the other held my own hand. Originally, he had alternated between feeding me chocolates and bringing his now cold drink to his lips. The time on Hongjoong’s phone read 5:52 am. I had long since finished my drink and passed out with my head on his shoulder sometime after 4 I think. Hongjoong hummed softly to the still playing music, like a soothing lullaby. He wanted to make sure I was fully asleep before deciding to move.

Hongjoong gently laid me on the pillow, going to turn off the lamp he’d had on and turning the music down a little more, before crawling back into bed. He cuddled me from behind, his warm chest pressed against my back as he pulled me closer to him in a tight embrace.

“Goodnight my love. Have sweet dreams. When you wake, I’ll be here. I promise. I won’t let you be lonely in the dark if I can help it. I love you. So I hope you use that love as a light. It’s not too late. So don’t give up, ok? We can do this. I love you.”

With a simple kiss to my head, he nuzzled closer, leaving me with floating thoughts.

It’s not too late. I’m not alone.

[mybiasisexo]

Shift of Shame 🤫

anon ask: 51 and 66 with chanyeol please 🤭

a/n: my pcy thirst has been up the roof lately :/. hes my ultimate again like ugh, just look at him 🥺

DRABBLE GAME | MASTERLIST

gif owner

You have never been more uncomfortable at work.

Self-consciously, you readjust the wrinkled pleated dress suit you had also worn the previous day, checking the mess on top of your head through the reflection of your computer, since you didn’t have time to shower this morning.

Your appearance is garnering looks. You try your best to ignore the lingering glances and whispering going on in your department. They, no doubt, curious as to what led to your disheveled appearance. You are known as the stickler boss, always prim, proper, and most importantly, professional.

Today? Not so much.

After gaining enough courage, you power walk to the break room with shoulders at your ears, being met with emptiness. You let out a relieved sigh and go straight for the coffee machine. You had been kept up rather late the night before and needed the brown brew if you were to get anything done.

While your coffee is being made, two people waltz inside the small space and you curse silently. They freeze once they spot you, but quickly continue past, towards the fridge. The whole time you focus solely on your drink, refusing to acknowledge anyone today. Unfortunately, one of them decides to interact.

“You look…nice.” That voice alone is enough to make your blood boil. “Familiar though. I could’ve sworn I saw it yesterday. “

You grit your teeth before dramatically turning, meeting the eyes of a Park Chanyeol. He’s leaning against the counter opposite you with a smug smile that leaves your palms itching with the urge to strike. Beside him, his partner-in-crime, Byun Baekhyun, throws him a ‘are you insane’ look, which he definitely is, but unlike everyone else in your department, Chanyeol isn’t afraid of you, especially now.

“What’s the point of having eyes that big if you can’t even remember what you saw yesterday?” You snap, voice even and polite.

His smile grows. Crossing his firm arms over his chest, he sinks lower onto the counter, getting comfortable.

“Oh, trust me, I remember everything I saw yesterday, which leads me to ask….” He cocks his head to the side, narrowing eyes ablaze like red hot coal. “Did you enjoy yourself last night?”

“Chanyeol!” Baekhyun is quick to hiss before throwing you an apologetic bow on his friend’s behalf.

“What?” Chanyeol asks, not sparing his shorter colleague a glance, too focused on the way your features go slack, a dangerous sign of your growing irritation. He goads further, “everyone in the office is wondering. Did our uptight boss finally get laid?”

You chuckle darkly, this is exactly what you need—someone to put all of your frustration on.

The clicking of your heels echo in the silence of the room as you make your way towards the giant in the nice suit. Baekhyun, sensing nothing good can come from this situation, scrambles out, leaving the pair of you alone.

You both watch each other.

Finally, in a husky voice, you admit, “I enjoyed myself very much, thank you.”

Chanyeol leans his head lower, evening out your faces. “You’re welcome.”

The tension between you both is stretched so thin it snaps. Simultaneously, you both lurch forward, mouths crushing against each other from the momentum. He groans immediately, the noise reverberating through your frame as you knot your fingers into his perfectly styled hair and he wraps his arms fully around your waist, dragging you crushingly against his chest.

Time isn’t on your side, so you break the kiss quickly, breathing into each other’s mouths. He nuzzles your nose with his own before dragging it down the side of your face to the crook of your neck, leaving a lingering kiss.

“You smell like sex,” he says, voice a low growl.

“Well, someone didn’t wake me up early enough to get ready for work this morning, so of course I still smell like last night.”

He chuckles. “You looked so peaceful sleeping in my bed, how could I have disturbed you? You seem like you rarely have time to relax.”

“If we keep this up,” you start, running a hand down his clothes torso to the band of his pants, which seem a little tight for him at the moment. “I’ll have even less time to.”

He grins naughtily. “Or, I’ll wear you out so much you’ll sleep soundly everytime we’re together.”

“Maybe.” You relent, kissing him once more before you head back to your now cold coffee, pouring it into a Styrofoam cup.

“So, are you free tonight?” Your back faces Chanyeol, but you can hear the nervousness in his low pitch. You grin, satisfied.

“I am.” You turn back to him, sipping the bitter drink. “But this time we’ll go to my place. Tomorrow, you’ll have to do the shift of shame.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” is his reply as he steals another kiss from you, not being able to help himself.

[beans-tacos]

Party Time| Agent Torres Short Story

It was late in the afternoon. The sun was setting, the street lights began to shine through out Los Angeles.

Most of everyone were ready to go home and live their lives. Agent Torres was in his office writing down a few notes for a case him and his partner have been working on. It's never a pleasant thing to do, especially with his partner Agent Cooper. Torres and Cooper aren't exactly friends nor do they get along pretty well. Torres tries his best to be nice towards Cooper. But sometimes it doesn't work out. They've known each other for the longest time. Torres knows him better than anyone else, usually because Cooper somewhat opens up to him. He never really talks about his childhood. All he says was "His father was a dick." Torres didn't question him any further.

Torres had finished with the notes and basically organized his things. He heard footsteps coming closer to his office. He recognized those footsteps but he decided to just not acknowledge them.

"Ah! Torres there ya are!"

That voice..... It just made Torres cringe a bit.... He took a quick glance at his partner, Agent Cooper.

"Shouldn't you be heading home by now? It's already past 6...." Torres said as he rolled his eyes.

"Well I was heading out until I remembered to tell you something" Cooper said with a chuckle.

Torres decided to finally look at him. Cooper was an average height. His hair was weirdly parted to the side and his eyes always looked angry.

"What is it this time???." Torres signed.

"Well," He began "I was wondering if you wanted to come to a party down at Beverly Hills with me."

Torres' not the type of person who goes out and party. He gets really anxious whenever a place gets really crowded or really loud. So he just stays at home and does his own things.

"Alright fine.... I'll go for a little while" Torres said with a deep sigh.

Cooper looked at him with a smirk that most douchebags give.

"I'll pick you up at 7:30, you better be looking pretty," He said as he walked out of Torres' office.

Torres rolled his eyes. He grabbed his belongings and headed out through the glass doors.

It was pretty windy outside. Torres walked up his car. He owned a pretty good car. It was black and somewhat clean but it ran like a dream. He unlocked his car and headed inside. He sat there for a good 5 seconds. Torres turned on the engine and drove off.

~~~

He laid on his bed letting out a loud breath. Torres stared at his ceiling and started thinking if he actually wanted to go to the damn party. He searched in his closet, hoping to find a somewhat decent outfit to wear. He's never been the type of guy to impress anyone other than his boss. Once he finally found something to wear, he ironed his clothes and put them on. He sprayed some cologne and fixed his hair.

"Hope this looks fine at the party," he said to himself.

He sat at his couch and took a glance at his wrist watch. 6:57.... It read. Torres rested his head on his hand and decided to go on his social media.

"Eh.... Nothing new...." He said.

He heard a vehicle pull up near his house. Torres looked out his window and saw a familiar car. Cooper owned a really nice car. Everything seemed to be in place and the paint looked hella fresh.

"Agent Torres! Get your ass out here!" He yelled as he honked his car.

Torres let out a deep sigh. He grabbed his jacket and headed out. He walked up to his partner's car and stood there as Cooper rolled down the window. Cooper whistled at him as if Torres was some weird girl hooker off the streets.

"Wow Ryan!" He chuckled, "You really did it this time."

"Oh shut it! It's nothing special...." Torres said sounding very annoyed.

Cooper just chuckled and watched him get inside his ride. Torres put on his seatbelt and just looked out the window.

~~~

They pulled up near a very strange looking house. It was two stories and was in pretty good condition. Cooper stared at Torres for what felt like forever.

"Are you going to be okay Torres??" He asked trying not to sound sarcastic.

Torres rolled his eyes and stepped out of his partner's car. Cooper followed Torres to the house. Once they were inside of the house, Torres already started feeling anxious. There were a group of people dancing, another group drinking, a couple of people making out in a corner. People everywhere.....

"Hey Cooper!" A man shouted in the distance. "Nice to see you man, who's this lovely gentleman you got here??"

Cooper placed his armed around Torres and pulled him closer.

"This is my boyfriend, Ryan Torres..... We work for the FBI," Cooper said with a chuckle.

"We're not.... Dating at all.... He just gets really excited when we both do something that I clearly don't want to do....." Torres said making it obvious that he's annoyed.

"Chill out Torres, Just messin' with ya," Cooper said with a chuckle.

Torres walked away from the conversation and was heading out near the balcony until he heard a loud pop that almost sounded like a gun shot. Torres froze, he saw everything around him in slow motion. His heart began to pound really fast and he felt like he couldn't breathe. He heard muffled yelling coming from behind him.

Torres! Torres!

Cooper ran up to him and shook him trying to get him to react.

"Dude! Are you okay?? Your skin turned so pale," He said sounding worried.

Torres took a deep breath and started to feel like himself again.

"I'm fine Cooper.... I'm heading out," He said as he smacked Cooper's hands off him.

~~~

Torres stood at the balcony, watching the beautiful view of the city. He heard footsteps approaching him.

"Hey! Torres, Thought you might be a wee bit thirsty so I brought you a drink." Cooper said with a chuckle.

He decided not to respond nor look at his drunk partner. Everytime they would both go out to "celebrate" Cooper would go ahead and drink as much as he could until he passed out on the ground. He was a real party animal that everyone hated.

"What happened back there Torres? You just kinda.... Froze there for a second.... And you turned so pale....." Cooper said.

"I rather not speak of it Jordan...." He said sounding a bit harsh.

"Eh well... We're all friends here... You can tell me anything...." Cooper said while giggling.

"You're not my friend.... You'll never be my friend Jordan.... Simple as that." Torres said sounding angry.

Cooper stood there looking like a lost puppy.

"Ah c'mon Torres don't be like that.... It ain't my fault that you can't handle going to parties... You always... Chicken out," He said sounding frustrated.

"I have PTSD! Jordan.... Maybe if you weren't such a huge douchebag.... You would of understand....." Torres yelled.

It went silent for what felt like forever. Then Torres broke the silence.

"I'm going home.... You can stay here and do whatever the fuck you want...." He said.

"Look man I'm sorry I didn't mean t-"

"It don't matter Jordan... Just... Forget about it okay??" Torres cut him off.

Torres walked away from his drunk partner. He didn't look back at him. Cooper's hands turned into fists. He felt his blood boil through his veins. He slammed his fists against the railing multiple times.

"God dammit! You stupid son of a bitch!" He yelled. "You just had to screw everything up didn't ya!?"

He began to sob.

~~~

Torres sat in the back seat of the taxi in complete silence. He just couldn't stop thinking about his partner. He did say some pretty harsh things to Cooper. He just hopes that he knows that he didn't mean those things. Just the look Cooper got when Torres was having an anxiety attack. He was hella worried. Although he may seem like a cold hearted douchebag, he does care about him. He may not show it as much but deep down Torres knows that he does. A warm tear ran down Torres' face. He quickly wiped it away with his sleeve of his jacket.

Once he got home, he sat down at his couch and took out his phone. He was debating whether he should text Cooper to make sure he's okay or to just not do it..... Torres decided to just let it rest until they both figure out something.

He laid on his back and rested his arm against he eyes.

He waited for the next day to kick in.....

(Writer's notes: This may be horrible but I honestly don't care.... I never post anything about my ocs but I guess I write now?? These 2 ocs are super old, I made them back in like 2016 or 2017 I can't remember..... I rewrote them to be less fandom based Ocs)

[littlebitlizbit]

The Two Year Miracle

Tinker...  Where do I begin? With his spirit, his sass? His grumble meow, or his cooing purr? The crook at the top of his long broken tail, or his blown out oracle eye? There are so many feelings and emotions that his name brings up, and I hope that I have the words to get them out right...

So right, where do I begin? I guess at the beginning. 

About two and a half years ago my household lost one of our cats to old age. Our other cat, Rufus, was never a huge fan of his late sibling, but he was still used to anothers cat’s company. I wanted to bring him in a new friend, but knew that financially it would be a stretch. I have a rare genetic disorder that gets in the way of full time work, and vet bills, especially for older cats, tend to add up... but still, Ruffie needed a companion.        I started to look online at some of the various animal rescues around the lower mainland, and stumbled across Katie’s Place. It is a no kill cat rescue, that offers a unique option for those looking to adopt.      It’s called the Permanent Foster Program. This program exists to get the most in need cats into a household asap. It applies to the senior cat’s, in Kate’s Place care, that have non life threatening issues. The hardest part about adopting out older cats is people’s concerns over vet bills, and this is where Katie’s place differs from most shelters... They work with vets who continue to see the cats for the remainder of their lives, and Katie’s Place covers any fees or medication costs.           I started looking through their cats available for adoption gallery, and finding out which ones were available for the PM program. There were at least three that could have been a good fit, so a friend and I headed out on one of their open house days to meet the candidates.            I remember thinking how smart of a set up they had, to house the rescues in a comfortable way. You pass through a safety gate and into a comfortably lit portable, with rooms running down either side of the hall, each with an connected covered patio. Instantly we were greeted by the “hall cats.” We entered the first room, that comfortably housed about 6 rescues. One of the PF cats was sleeping in her bed, and she perked up as I put my arm near her bed. She was a beauty white fluffy girl, who was sweet, but wasn’t a fan of other cats, so not the best fit. As we popped in and out of the rooms, I had my eye out for one named Smigeon, a black fluffy guy who sounded chill on the website. He was in one of the rooms towards the back, on the porch, a volunteer informed me. On the way through to him, my eye was draw to this miserable looking cat, with very obvious sight issues. He was bald and covered in scabs, raising his paw cautiously in front of himself from on top of a cage within a cage. There was something about him... but not wanting to startle him, I let him be, and continued through the door to find Smigeon snoozing utop a cat tree. He instantly rolled over and gave me the sweetest look and started purring at my pets. I was sold, and went to tell the woman in charge that I would like to take him. As I was petting some cats nearby her and another volunteer, I overheard the volunteer tearfully say “I don’t want him to die in here.” I went over and asked what was up, and was told that Smigeon came in with another cat, but this other cat was super sick, and had a stomach tumour, and wasn’t expected to last more than two weeks. I called home and asked my partner if he trusted me, and he said yes. I told him we were getting two cats. Turns out the mostly blind scabby guy was Smigeon’s old house mate. I knew that I could give him so much love in the time he had left, and though it would hurt, resigned myself to this short term guy. I was told to really have a think about it overnight, and was there the moment they opened the next day with carriers ready to bring them home.        It was as if this scabby cat, this Tinker, knew we were coming for him. He was off of his smaller cage, and at the mouth of his big one with his paw outstretched towards me the moment I walked in. My friend helped cage up Smigeon while I got Tinker into his. Smige fell asleep in his cage on the way home, while Tinker, sat half in his cage, half on my lap, staring either at me or out the window. He could see a bit...but not much. 

And then the boys were home.

Smigeon pranced around the house like he was the happiest prince. He LOVED water, like would let the tap drip on his head he loved it so much (even tried to jump into the bath with me once.) Rufus was wary of Smigeon, there were a couple hisses, but for the most part didn’t seem to mind him.      Tinker was another story... the poor guy walked into walls and chairs, but could see at least a little bit and had great hearing. Rufus was mesmerized by him. Like he could tell that something was wrong with this guy, so wasn’t aggressive in the least bit. If Tinker hissed, Ruffie would just quietly sniff near him, and give him space.       That first night, all the cats were on the bed. Tinker couldn’t jump up on his own, so I made him a set of makeshift stairs, that he ended up being really good with. He then marched, with all the grumpy sass of an old man, onto my chest, and promptly curled himself around my neck, falling almost instantly and deeply asleep. I knew then and there that this cat had my heart, in a way that I’d never experienced before. 

Sure, I’ve had some great cats, amazing cats, sweet silly cats. One of my favourite cats growing up was exceptional, Taz. He was a rescue, a smushed faced himalayan persian, who would jump from the floor up to my stomach then from stomach to shoulder and perch there. He’d give me kisses and hugs, sat on my lap every meal and whenever I was on a couch. He slept at my feet and used to love to sit on my chest and just stare at me, purring. He was the cat that made me fall in love with grumpy old man cats... but he has long since passed and I didn’t think I’d ever get that lucky again. 

I was wrong. 

As the days went by, Tinker thrived. Him and Rufus seemed to be bonding exceptionally fast, and he would devour any food that was put in front of him. He loved fresh water, and would drink loudly while padding the floor, and then would put his paw right into his mug. Oh yes, he drank out of a Batman mug, he wouldn’t drink out of a bowl, but the mug was his jam.         Smigeon, our clean, other than being older, bill of health kitty, on the other hand, was not doing well. No matter what I’d put down for him food wise, he wouldn’t eat. Not even fresh cooked meat or bacon. I started to “baby bird” him and would fill a thick syringe up with moist food, and feed him that way. He ate a tiny bit of dry food one day, and he’d drink tons of water. After a week I brought him and Tinker in for a check up, since Tinker’s skin condition didn’t seem to be getting any better, and Smigeon was getting weaker. Turns out Tinker, and now my house, had ringworm. But poor Smidge, the vet wanted to keep overnight, to see if he’d improve after being on an IV. I was called the next day by the vet, Dr.Gold, who told me that they did some more tests on Smigeon, and it turned out that his entire body was riddled with tumours. He was weak and in pain and the vet said there was nothing they could do, and that we needed to let him go. I rushed out in time to hold him, give him lots of loves and pets, as he crossed the rainbow bridge in my arms. It was hard, and unexpected, but I’m thankful that he at least got to have a final couple of weeks in a loving home. 

           He and Smigeon did not come from a safe/loving home. Tinker had scarring that showed not only a once broken tail, but also ribs. Some of his teeth were broken, and he wasn’t born blind, but one of his eye was completely blown out. Both cats were surrendered after a raid, completely matted and dehydrated. It boils my blood to think that some people can be so cruel...             Back home, now Rufus had contracted ringworm, and both Tinker and him had to be quarantined in the spare room, while we disinfected the entire house. Tinker was on cold meds, as well as ringworm meds, and it took me a few times to figure out the best way to administer it. He would go full on feral if I tried to pinch his mouth open at all, but the liquid meds seemed to be the easiest, while I held him with my arms and legs. Both boys had to get bathed once every 2  to 3 days for about two months, and we had to completely disinfect their room a couple of times a day.                     During this time I would go, in my massive Batman onesie, and just lay down with them. Rufus was never big on pets and cuddles, but everytime Tinker would march straight up my chest, and lay claim to the real estate around my neck. My guess is that my breath on him from there was comforting, like he knew he was safe... The two boys became inseparable in that time, and Ruffie actually started to want tactile love. Rufus had never liked to sleep near any other cats, but the two of then now cuddled almost constantly. 

         Finally, after getting the final check/ok from the vets, the boys quarantine was over. (Funny side story, during that visit Tiker needed to have bloodwork done... I could hear him yowling down the hall, and when they brought him back in the vet tech was wearing a fully padded suit, and plastic neck and face guard. She basically threw him at me...poor feral guy, but was calm the second he was back in my arms) Tinker was the first out of the room, slowly but surely relishing in his new freedom. Rufus was a little more cautious upon exiting the room, but cautious is kind of his default. 

     Slowly but surely more of Tinker’s personality started to come out, as he blossomed. We’d now had him for about three months, and he was showing no signs of slowing down...in fact quite the opposite. After watching him one morning accurately swat at and chase a fly, I realized how good his hearing was. The pet store near me sold these crinkle balls, that made the slightest noise while being batted around. As soon as I dropped it for him, a new Tinker was unleashed. He chased and batted around that thing with the energy and accuracy of a kitten. I couldn’t believe it. Neither could the vet. On his next check up they were pleased at his weight gain, and the fact that his fur was starting to grow back in (the exact same shade as Rufus, who knew!?). His tumour wasn’t growing, but it also wasn’t shrinking, so he was put on some pain meds to make him a little more comfortable. He became even more active after that. It’s funny, he would sing, literally sing and coo to his crinkle ball wherever he would catch it and carry it around in his mouth all proud like. If he’d lose it under some furniture, we’d have to go on our hands and knees around the house to see what he lost it under, because he would cry if he couldn’t find it. Finally I bought him a pack of 12 online, so that if he lost it, we could just pop him out another. Well that didn’t work out.... turns out this one crinkle ball in particular was his baby, and no matter what, we couldn’t trick him into a different one.

As winter started to melt into spring, and we started to let Tinker out into the front yard. It’s completely fenced in, and I'd sit with him while he explored, sniffing everything he could, with a lust for life.           When I was home (Which was most of the time) he would be my constant shadow. I sew, as well as make jewelry, and whenever, wherever I had a project on the go, Tinker would be right there beside me. I ended up getting him these vintage stools covered in padded fabric, and he would snooze lazily on them beside me as I worked away, occasionally waking up for some fresh water and head pets. Him and Rufus were still super close, cuddling for hours every day, an absolute first for Ruffie. He adopted a small Batman stuffy of mine, and started cuddling with it daily. The days that I had to go to work, he would give me sass all morning (if I put on makeup that seemed to be the give away that I was going out) and then come trotting to the door, as fast as he could, upon arriving back home. He did this hilarious thing when he was upset with me for going out... he’d crawl onto the bed and start biting the blanket. The first time he did it I thought he was stuck or something, but then I tried to pull the blanket away, and he grumble meowed. He would do it anytime I had to go out of town (The longest I was ever away was three nights) and usually when I’d come home from work. It turned out to be like a game of tug of war for him. 

 Before I knew it, a whole year had gone by with this little miracle. I was falling more and more in love with him as time went on, all the while painfully aware that every moment with him was a gift. He started to get a bit more grumbly, and eventually started developing mouth ulcers, apparently something common in cats with stomach cancer. During a check up the vet said it might be time to let him go, but he was still super active. Still eating and drinking a ton, still purred when getting love, and still played actively with his crinkle ball. We decided to treat the ulcers as best we could, and upped his CBD dose. The vet said that if the ulcers didn’t shrink with this treatment, that it might be time to let him go. I knew his lust for life, but alo didn’t want him to suffer. I remember getting him home, and telling him that I would fight for his life as long as he did. I know that cats can’t understand our language, but I feel like some of them are really excellent at picking up intent. He would always look me square in the eye, with whatever vision he had left, and seemed to be intently listening. He would talk back often too, it was pretty incredible.              That week he upped his active factor... Played more than usual, wanted to go outside more, cuddled a ton, and was just an overall super happy to be alive cat. I sent the vet videos of him from that week, and she couldn’t believe it. She agreed that this was a cat who still had living to do, so ulcer meds got added to the pain med list, and he kept on going. 

I started working from home, and that really pleased Tinker, though he became even more bonded to me than I thought possible. It got to the point where I'd open the bathroom door, and there he’d be, sitting like a patient dog, waiting to crawl back into my lap. He took his meds like a champ, and just like that, we were passing the two year mark of bringing him home.

Things with him were mostly great, but he was starting to slow down little by little.

 He started to pee on the floor once in awhile, around the litter box, rather than in it. He prefered to do his business outside, but if someone wasn’t around to take him out, he would let his displeasure be known this way. He started coming and asking for his pain meds at the exact time he was supposed to get them, if not a little earlier. He was getting slower and slower, and I knew that the time was near. I started to build up this steel wall of protection around my heart, because everytime I thought of life without him, I’d feel this overwhelming sense of loss, and couldn’t stop from crying uncontrollably. We took things a day at a time, and things were mostly normal, other than him getting a little slower. A couple of days after my birthday he was playing with his crinkle ball. The next day he didn’t eat much, but still drank a ton and went outside. The next day he didn’t eat anything, but still drank and went outside, albeit slowly. Three days after playing with his crinkle ball he had trouble standing. I looked him in the eyes and could see that my little miracle, the grumpy old man of my life, the cat love of my life, was done. I called the vet, and found out that our favourite Doctor was just getting home from Japan that night. The receptionist booked him in to be put to sleep the next day and I hoped, selfishly, that our she could make it in.            I was with him 24/7 that final week, and spent the last 48 hours on the floor with him. The morning of his appointment i brought him onto my chest, one final time onto the bed. He fell fast asleep, and I got to just feel his warmth and breath for about 4 hours. Finally, but way too soon, it was time. My friend picked me up, and we drove him out, as we had for multiple check ups, him wrapped in a towel on my lap. The wall of protection around my heart was suffering terrible fissures, but I knew that I had to be strong for him. I did my best not to cry or allow my energy to get upset, so as not to upset him. Thankfully Dr.Gold, our favourite vet, was able to make it in. She set aside a room fo us for an hour, dimmed the lights, and had a beautiful hand knit blanket for him. Remembering what he was like that last time he got poked with a needle, I asked them if I could go in the back with him to have the IV put in, and they were kind enough to just do it all right in the room. He didn’t even squawk when they administered it, which just solidified for us how done he was. We were offered more time with him, but I knew he was done, and every moment with him now was a selfish one. He closed his eyes for pets, then looked at me one final time, as the rainbow bridge opened in front of him. 

Afterwards I felt strangely numb, but also calm. I did what I had set out to do, two years previous, and was given so much more than I ever could have hoped for. As I’m typing this I’m crying, and have had to take multiple breaks. Knowing that such a special relationship is over, in these forms, has been harder than I’d care to admit. Being prepared to lose him from the get go hasn’t made grieving any easier. Greif is such a funny thing, that comes for you when you’re least expecting it. I’m bursting into tears much more than I’m comfortable with, but I know things will get easier with time. I’ll never stop missing him, but will always be forever grateful for every single bonus day we had together. 

      Rufus is doing ok now, though he is grieving too. His tail had a droop to it, and was yeowling the nights away... So I did what I did the last time he lost a sibling... He now has a new PF brother, Clue. I may not have much money, or energy, but I saw first hand the difference love and affection can have on a life. Clue is an all black fluffy guy, just like Smigeon was, and has asthma. He’s drooly and sweet, and him and Rufus have already started sleeping on the couch together. There is no way that Tinker could ever be replaced. That’s a hole in my soul that I don’t think will ever fully heal...but knowing that I’m making a difference in another life helps.  There are so many animals in need of loving homes, and not enough homes to house them. If you can, please consider adopting from our local shelter or animal rescue. I get the impulse for wanting a certain breed, but going to a breeder or a pet store is unnecessary. Just as many pure breeds cycle through rescues as not, so if you’re patient you can become the furrever home to the pet of your dreams, for a fraction of the price, and every fee paid to a rescue ensures that they can continue to help more animals.

My time with Tinker taught me to really appreciate life, and see things to be thankful for with crystal like clarity. He’s taught me compassion and patience on a new level, and gave me a lifetime's worth of cat love memories. 

Think of all that your next rescue could teach you, and start looking. Nothing would make me happier than if this story can inspire you to open your heart, and home. It can be hard, it can be painful, but I promise you, it’s worth it.  Please consider donating to Katie’s Place if you have the means. Or your own local animal rescue. http://katiesplaceshelter.com/ Thank you.

Love always,

Elizabeth xoxo

[oddeyecadia]

what if it’s us? (ch. 4)

a/n: no one prolly cares abt this fic anymore but lol still gonna continue

also posted on ao3 | ch. 1 ch. 2 ch. 3

"I think Allura's my soulmate."

Just like that, everything stopped. Time, the beating of her heart, the universe itself. All the little scars and bruises on her body tingled in a strange, unpleasant way. He was the only one smiling now. The clear excitement on his face made her feel harder to breathe.

Of course.

Pidge gritted her teeth.

Of fucking course.

"I saw her left foot earlier. It was bandaged the same way as my left foot. Do you know when she got that?"

"Yeah, uh..." She had it even before you had yours, dumbass. "Just this morning, I think." Pidge internally slapped herself. She didn't want to lie, she really didn't. But she also didn't want to erase the pure joy he was clearly feeling.

Though, her decision was going to make a lot of mess was it? She took a deep breath and as she was about to change her mind, Lance's gaze fell to the floor with a look that took every breath of her away and spoke softly. "I finally found her."

Out of all of his smiles, the one he wore right then was probably the most beautiful. She could see the relief and love he was ready to give attached to it.

Something about the fact that someone else was the reason for this smile bothered her a lot. It could be just the guilt for lying, making him smile for the wrong person, that creeped up her back.

Yeah. She hoped it was just that.

"Your turn." Said Lance, interrupting her thoughts.

"Huh?"

"What were you gonna say earlier?"

"Oh. Just that I- I noticed how you and Allura have the same injury too."

There was no turning back.

___

"Stop glaring, Hunk." Pidge said quietly, feeling the intense look he was giving her.

Brown eyes kept staring at her as she continued to type on her laptop. She felt uneasy but not to the point where she couldn't focus on the email that she was writing to her professor. A letter to inform her about the extremely unfair division of tasks in her group and how her two group mates barely did anything for their project.

Somewhere in the library, she could hear Lance being absentmindedly loud again. That and Hunk's glare growing more intense was enough to make her take a deep breath and finally look at the guy across her.

"Look what you've done." He said.

"I didn't do anything."

"Exactly. You didn't do anything to stop him from thinking Allura was his soulmate! Look at him!" He whisper shouted, pointing at the main desk. There, was Allura, staring blankly at Lance who was leaning an elbow on the desk and smirking at her like an idiot.

Pidge rolled her eyes, trying her hardest to keep her blood boiling at the sight. "He looks happy."

"He looks stupid, Pidge. You know what he said to me that night? 'Would it be more romantic if I make her realize rather than just telling her?'" She fought a grin at Hunk's accurate impression of Lance's slightly high pitched voice. "And just a few weeks ago you were like 'Never. Let him find out on his own.' You two just love miscommunication and complicating things more huh?"

"It'd be more complicated if I told him while he was so stoked about the idea of another person being his soulmate. It would ruin his mood, make things awkward, and possibly ruin our friendship too." Besides, she didn't want to mess things up after they just had their deep conversation and learned to really open up to each other for the first time.

It had been a couple of days since that whole thing happened. Finals was next week, everyone had been pretty busy with their own thing. Allura had to take care of some important stuff these past couple of days that Pidge had to work at the library on her own again. Meaning, Lance didn't immediately got the chance to start his wooing.

"She's not here?" He asked the night after their "hangout friday"- as Hunk would call it.

"She has a checkup. Sorry,  loverboy ."

"Aww man." The boy looked down at his feet. "I must've hurt her real bad."

Pidge's frown deepened as she only hummed in response. It was too early for her to casually talk about soulmates after what just happened .

"Well, guess I'll just study then. Hey, Pidge."

She looked at him, he raised a brow. "You're taking care of yourself, right?"

Snorting, she couldn't fight a grin. Why was he like this? Could he stop being so nice for a second? "Yeah, don't worry. I remember your advice by heart."

Pidge cringed internally, remembering what she said.

"Fix this, Pidge."

"I will, Hunk. Just– let him have his fun for a little while." Ignoring the slight pain in her chest and Hunk's disappointed look, she finally finished the email and pressed send.

___

Shoe squeaks and loud pop music filled the gym.

The highest bleacher was cold against the palm of her hands. Pidge could see everything from up here. It was nice. Plus, she was far from everyone, far from the volleyball team playing and from the dance team which she found out was just like a bunch of Lance put in one group. Everyone was just as loud and boisterous.

"Why am I here again?"

Lance looked up at her from where he stood, one bleacher below, and flashed a smile. "Because Hunk isn't available and I'm used to having a friend watch me practice. You don't have a choice."

She let out a deep breath. At least Hunk wasn't available for real this time. Unlike the last time he left the two where he tried to play wingman.

"Ugh. Don't you have like a hobby that's a little more... quiet?"

"Oh come on, Pidge. Don't you think a bunch of college kids dancing and doing dangerous stunts is cool?"

Her attention was caught by a flyer being thrown in the air. The guy landed too quickly and it was obvious by the shocked look on their faces that his spotters weren't ready, they caught him immediately anyways.

"Fun." Her hands started sweating, seeing the team practice that same stunt again. "Is this a requirement? I mean does this boost up your grades in any way?"

"Not really. Clubs and stuff like this doesn't really add that much to my GPA." He said as he took out his water bottle.

"Why didn't you just take performing arts then?"

He took a sip. "I was going to. I wanted to study and make money out of dancing but... let's be honest, the money part would be kinda hard to achieve. So I went with my second favorite thing to do, taking care of people. I took nursing."

Pidge was about to ask another question when one of his teammates suddenly shouted. "Lance! You ready?"

"Yup! Just a sec!" Lance put down his bottle before giving her another proud smile. "Just enjoy the show, Katarina. We have like fifteen minutes left of practice. It'll be quick."

She watched as he carefully walked down the bleachers and towards his team. She bit her lip when her injured foot throbbed slightly as she saw Lance unintentionally take a hard step.

A member then approached him and said something she couldn't obviously hear.

Nodding his head, he smiled at said member before getting into position.

There was something off about that smile, though. How he went from being all jumpy to stiff right after said teammate talked to him was not a good sign too.

Pidge pushed her glasses up her nose.

The same pop music that was on repeat for minutes played again as the dance team started their routine. They did some incredible stunts and moves that could make anyone jump from their seat yet she couldn't take her eyes away from a single dancer.

Ocean waves.

That was the only thing she could think of as she watched him sway, turn, pop and glide. Lance danced so swiftly yet every move had a hint of snap. His hips didn't lie, his whole body moved so in sync with the beat.

He didn't look like he was having as much fun, though, and one time he looked as if he wasn't sure if he was in the right position which was concerning.

But still.

That was hot.

___

"I have eight papers due tomorrow and I haven't started any of them." Said Keith after taking a big gulp of milk straight from the carton as he sat by the kitchen counter.

He was lactose intolerant.

"And why's that?"

"I don't know, Shiro. Everytime I begin typing I just burst into tears."

Even through the phone, his brother's disappointed sigh was still upsetting to hear. "College's tough huh?"

Keith chuckled. "That's an understatement."

"I know but you have to be more responsible. Be more like Katie but without the overworking part." Keith frowned at the second statement, remembering all those nights he had to drag an exhausted Pidge to bed and how he hated seeing her all stressed up. He took another sip. "Speaking of, how is she? Her finals is coming up right? I hope she's not over studying again."

"Strangely but fortunately, no. She hasn't overworked herself in days."

"That's good. Matt's visiting you guys today so–"

Keith chocked on his milk before Shiro could even finish his sentence.

He totally forgot about that.

"You okay there?" Shiro asked. Keith could already see his brother's teasing smirk and it caused his ears to burn up.

"Yeah, just– Just remembered I'm lactose intolerant." He cleared his throat. "Anyway, yeah. Pidge mentioned that."

Meanwhile, Shiro couldn't help but chuckle at his little brother's clear nervousness. "Don't worry, you have my permission to say yes when he asks you out on a date. Again."

Keith went silent for a moment.

That was when Shiro spoke again, his voice softer and Keith could almost see him wearing his comforting smile. "It's okay, Keith."

Something in his chest loosened and he took a deep breath. Keith already knew what it meant for he had heard it from him a million times. It was the first time he heard Shiro say it like that, though. It felt and sounded like real reassurance this time, like not only the situation was okay, but also himself.

As if on cue, a couple of loud knocks were heard from Keith and Pidge's apartment door and he tensed up.

"Thanks, Shiro. I'll call you again later?"

"After you finish your papers first. Now go, entertain your guest."

Keith ignored Shiro's teasing tone, said goodbye and hanged up before walking towards the door.

He already had a guess of who the person on the other side was. And if he was right, said guest was a little bit early for his sister wasn't even home yet.

Here goes nothing. Keith finally opened the door and lo and behold, he was right. He hated that he was right.

Matthew Holt stood in front of him with a warm smile, the familiar scar still clear and present across the bridge of his nose. "Hey, Keith."

[dawnofaqua]

Green Looks Good On You

Danny posts a lot of nudes and Roy doesn’t like it.

A/N: This is a prompt that was sent to me by an anon. I worked on this for a while, and I kept postpone the day I would post it because something bothered me about it and thanks to Lemonade, I found out what it is: that I don’t enjoy writing about some topics unless I make clear that I don’t feel the same way as the characters.

So, I thought I should make a little disclaimer before this: first of all I don’t know Roy or Danny and this is purely fictional, of course, but the most important thing is another one. Jealousy can be cute to an extent, but once it becomes toxic - as in “I want my partner to stop doing x because I don’t like it” it’s not cute anymore. Being in love shouldn’t mean you want to tear your lover’s wings apart just because you’re scared or because you want them all for yourself. That’s not love, that’s obsession and it’s not healthy. Please, if you ever find yourself in a relationship or friendship that makes you think “I don’t want to do this because x would get mad” consider leaving that person. Now, onto the fiction!

Roy had always been used to sleeping for only a few hours per night: when he moved to New York, between his work as a seamstress and his shows in drag at night, he would be able to sleep only around four hours before the alarm was ready to get him out of bed early in the morning. Even now that he was more successful and he could relax whenever he wanted, there was this rush, this need of doing more and more, to fill every hour with something. It wasn’t weird that anyone would call him a workaholic, and he never really cared. Relaxing was good and everything, but after a few hours he’d feel anxious, thinking that he was wasting time. D.J., once, had joked that he needed a Momo in his life, and Roy had just rolled his eyes at the time, snapping back and telling him that he was even surprised the other one would know the book at all. He was confident, though, that he wasn’t losing time. It was actually well spent in his mind, after all, his fans were always happy with his work, why would he stop then?

The thought that maybe he needed to slow down at least for a few days arrived during his traveling for the premiere of Hurricane Bianca. He wasn’t on tour with his show in May and until the end of June he wouldn’t have to leave the US, and when people told him he was lucky to have almost two months of relax, he just laughed and pointed at everything he still had to do. There was DragCon, tough he would be there only for one day to sign his new book, Hurricane Bianca was gonna come out, and the whole Drag Tots had just been announced after he worked on it with a few of his friends. To think he would actually take two months to just recharge was funny, at least to him.

But then, when the various premieres of Hurricane Bianca had finished, Roy just needed to open Instagram to witness how much he needed some time off. He had been posting photos and answered few of his friends as well, but he didn’t pay too much attention at anything - except for the whole Acid Betty thing, since everyone texted him about it - while he was travelling.

Roy was greeted with a picture of Adore on tour. He knew she was in England, and she looked happy in the picture - she was surely having a shit ton of fun. He just needed to see her smile to feel suddenly empty.

They talked in the last few days, mostly because of the way Danny acted a few days before. Shane texted him about the whole situation, and after reading his tweets, Roy thought he could give him a hand to understand what he did that night, talking so loudly at 4 am, was wrong. It wasn’t really cute, mostly because Danny was stubborn and childish sometimes, and he didn’t want to understand what Roy was trying to tell him. They didn’t argue, at least not too much, and while Roy wasn’t sure the other one had understood what he was trying to make him understand, at least he gave him something to think about. They texted a few times, mostly to know how they were doing, but it surely wasn’t like talking face to face.

That’s what made him feel empty. They had spent so much time together at the start of the year, he was growing used to having Danny around him most of the time, and once he was back on tour through the States, it was difficult to realize he couldn’t simply get up, call Danny and tell him they could hang out that night. It was something he then got used to all over again as soon as the tour kept going, but it still bothered him.

Roy clicked on the username of his friend: he decided to go through his latest posts, just to see what he has been up to, maybe leave a few comments and let him know he was thinking about him.

Most of the pictures were from the tour, obviously. There were also a few pictures of places he had seen while travelling, some with his friends… and naked pictures.

Now, that wasn’t something new - Danny had always been open about his sexuality and he liked to post pictures like this one, but the thought didn’t make Roy feel any better. He usually ignored them, because everytime he could feel his stomach tighten in a strong grip that resembled jealousy too much for his taste; just thinking about it was scary. Danny was young, he liked to have fun and Roy didn’t want to ruin their beautiful friendship in any way. He couldn’t have feelings for Danny, no, it was out of discussion.

He had to repeat to himself those words while he decided to stop looking at the photos, especially after reading all the comments of people praising him for his appearance. He didn’t want to get upset about Danny simply being himself and living his life, especially since they were probably gonna see each other the next day - he was going back to Los Angeles and the other one was coming back from England - or even to the people that commented. It wasn’t their fault Roy was jealous, not even Danny’s, it was his own for letting himself feel anything remotely romantic towards his friend.

He put down the phone and called it a night. The flight was early in the morning the next day, and he had to rest at least a bit if he didn’t want to look like a mess - and lingering his thoughts more on the matter would’ve never let him close his eyes. He got under the blankets, took a deep breath and tried to fall asleep, praying that his own feelings would’ve let him rest for once.

Of course, Roy couldn’t sleep at all that night. He kept turning around, waiting for his eyes to finally get heavier and let him slowly lose consciousness, but he had never been lucky with that. His brain kept reminding him of all those pictures, Danny’s face in everyone of them with that little smirk of someone that knew how attractive they were, the comments of everyone complimenting him… it was almost painful, at some point.

In the end, Roy got up for his flight with zero sleep, got dressed up and took the plane and went home. He managed to sleep at least a bit during the flight, even if he kept waking up for a few minutes and then fall asleep again, but at least he wasn’t as exhausted as he was when he woke up that morning. He also managed to stop thinking about the pictures, and when he arrived home he was just happy to see his babies again.

“Hi baby, come here.”

He called Dede, that was still jumping in front of him even when he sat down and took Sammy on the couch with him. She was always a little more energetic than the other dog, but that day it was more than usual; Dede was jumping and barking like she did when someone was coming and she could hear them already, but Roy wasn’t expecting any visitors. He was actually thinking to go to sleep for a while, since that day he didn’t have any work to do, and wanted to try to rest for the next day.

His plans were cancelled as soon as Dede sprinted to the main door, just a few seconds before someone rang the bell. Roy sighed, then got up from the couch after stroking Sammy’s head one last time and yelled a “Coming!” loud enough for whoever was on the other side to hear him.

He knew Danny was gonna come back that day, but as soon as he saw his friend in front of him, that stupid grin printed on his face and his luggage behind him, Roy was surprised. After last night, he pushed any kind of thought about Danny deep down, where they were gonna be out of sight in his own brain, but as soon as he saw him they broke free and filled his mind. The photos, especially, were still there - and he could feel his blood boiling in his veins. For a few seconds he even considered slamming the door in front of Danny’s face, but as soon as he was able to find control again, Roy remembered that it wasn’t Danny’s fault that those pictures made him angry. He didn’t want to be harsh to him, so instead of slapping him, Roy managed to smile and even hug Danny, that let out a laugh while hugging him back.

“I’m back, bitch!”

He chirped in Roy’s ear, so loud he almost made him deaf. Roy chuckled, patting his back for a few seconds; he was still on the edge, but the more he could feel the warmth of Danny’s body against his, the more he was feeling comfortable. It was always a mystery to him how the younger one was able to calm him with just a smile or a hug.

“I can see that.”

The reply came out a little more harsh than intended, but thankfully Danny thought it was just one of his jokes and laughed again, breaking the hug. Roy held him for a few seconds more, until he had to do the same to not raise any question - even if it wasn’t what he wanted to do. After all, he missed Danny a lot in the last weeks, more than he felt comfortable admitting.

Roy glanced at the luggage behind Danny’s back and raised an eyebrow, giving a questioning look to the younger one.

“You came here straight from the airport?” When Danny nodded, Roy couldn’t help but sigh. “You live next door, you should’ve stopped there first!”

Danny didn’t look like he cared at all about what Roy was saying; he took the bag with him, entering the older man’s house and then said hi to the dogs with a high pitched voice. Roy just closed the door, and couldn’t help but chuckle a bit: Dede was trying to jump in Danny’s arms, but she was clearly too little to be able to, at least until Danny decided to get down to get her.

“I couldn’t! I wanted to see you and these babies… I missed you all so much.”

Danny mumbled, while he was busy covering Dede with kisses. He then did the same to Sammy, once they were all on the couch, and surprisingly enough he even gave Roy a quick kiss on the cheek. He had always been affectionate, but for Roy everytime he gave him that kind of attention, it was a beautiful surprise he didn’t think he deserved at all.

Of course, that was the only thing he needed to completely forget about those pictures. He smiled, simply happy to have his best friend back, even if he gave Danny a little punch on his arm.

“Ever heard of consent?”

“Come on, it was just a little kiss!”

Danny complained, making Roy laugh loudly - and he joined the laugh immediately afterwards. They spent some time like that, just talking: Danny was clearly not pissed at him after the whole 4am thing, he even told Roy he was right and that he was simply pissed in the heat of the moment, and then they talked about their travellings in the last weeks. Roy talked about the different premieres of Hurricane Bianca; they all went well, people seemed to like the movie just as much as the first one if not more and he was really proud of Matt and his crew’s work. He was hoping they would make another one, and maybe this time Adore could be in it. Danny was simply happy just thinking about the possibility of finally working on a movie together, after last year’s mess.

Then it was Danny’s turn. While Roy managed to witness how happy he looked on tour thanks to some of the photos, hearing from him directly that it was the time of his life and that he really enjoyed being able to interact with his fans and feel their love. Roy could listen to him talk all night, and even without saying anything at all, just like he was doing in that exact moment. His enthusiasm made Roy smile, and he caught himself almost stroking his head at some point, but then managed to stop before Danny could notice. He knew the younger one probably wouldn’t read too much into it, but after last night, Roy felt that if he tried anything remotely affectionate, he would give away what he was feeling. It was almost as if he feared Danny would be able to see through his chest and realize how his heart would beat faster everytime he was nearby.

Danny leaned on him, placing his head on Roy’s shoulder once he decided to stop talking. Maybe he was tired as well, after all he just came back from another country - and he was more than ready to let him sleep there, in his bed. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time; it was something they always did, now that they lived next to each other more than ever.

Instead, Danny looked up to him, his eyes twinkling like everytime he was ready to drag him out of the house, and then smiled.

“How about we go out and get something to drink? It’s been so long!”

Roy sighed; he knew Danny would ask him something like that, and while usually he was more than happy to go out with him as well, after the last couple of weeks he was just looking forward to a chill night on his couch, maybe with a glass of wine and a movie on.

“I think I’ll pass today. I didn’t get much sleep last night, I just really want to rest.”

Danny pouted, poking his arm for few seconds before he sighed as well. He was ready to hear the younger one complain, like he usually did when Roy declined his invitations, but instead he placed his head on his shoulder again for a few seconds before getting up. He didn’t look pissed off, he was smiling again.

“All right, but we’re still drinking and you can’t say no!”

He chirped then, and without waiting for Roy to answer him, Danny made his way to the kitchen. He knew where Roy had what he called “the good stuff”, and it didn’t take him too much to come back with bottles of different drinks and two glasses.

“You know, we shouldn’t mix those--”

“Oh shut up, I’m not a baby. I know what I’m doing.”

Roy let out a laugh, then decided to let Danny do whatever he wanted. After all, if he was sure they could get wasted without any problem, he had to know he was free the next day. While Danny was usually wild and ready to party everyday, he also loved his work as much as Roy did, so he probably wouldn’t drink too much if he knew he had to do something in the morning. It was always difficult for Roy to stop acting like his mother; he would always worry about Danny’s well being, even if now the other one was a little older and a little more mature, even if he never lost his childish vibe.

Roy didn’t want to sound too much like a party pooper, so he simply sighed and took the glass that Danny was giving him. After a while, they both had drunk a few glasses together, and they were definitely in a happier mood. They were still talking, but this time there were more giggles, and Roy didn’t feel the need to be less affectionate than usual. At some point, he even held Danny close, while the younger one was playing with the buttons on his shirt.

“You’re finally back at being yourself, bitch. I was worried.”

Danny said after a while, a softer smile on his face. Roy didn’t understand: he frowned, looking at the other one with a questioning look, hoping he would tell him more about it. Danny simply shrugged, while he kept unbuttoning and buttoning back the same button on Roy’s shirt. He didn’t pay too much attention to it.

“Well, when you opened the door you didn’t really look like you were happy to see me. I almost thought you were gonna close the door right on my nose.”

His voice was cheerful, as if he knew Roy would never do that… and that was what made it painful to Roy. He actually thought of doing so, to someone that actually didn’t do anything at all to him. He didn’t want Danny to know, though, so he laughed a bit, scratching him a little behind a ear like he was a kitten to cuddle.

“I was just caught off guard. As if I didn’t know that if I closed the door on you, you’d take it down with kicks.”

That was enough for Danny to laugh and punch him lightly on an arm, and then everything was fine again. They talked a little more, but soon the younger one was more interested in going through social media and pointing at things that made him laugh, so he could show them to Roy. It was okay, until he suddenly stopped and smirked at his phone. Of course, Roy caught his expression, and he had to ask what happened.

“I’ve been stalking this guy for months, he’s so hot - and he liked one of my pics. Well, I wouldn’t blame him, my ass looks fantastic in that one.”

Danny exclaimed with a laugh, but as soon as he brought his eyes on Roy’s again, he stopped.

Roy didn’t like being jealous. It was a stupid thing to do, especially when you’re jealous of someone much younger, prettier and especially someone that wasn’t yours to begin with. And yet here he was: it took him just one comment from Danny about one of his naked pictures for the jealousy to be back as if he didn’t spend an entire day trying to not think about it. It was boiling in his body, hotter than any drink he had ever had, and this time around he wasn’t able to control it.

“What’s going on? Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not. Can you put your phone away? I don’t want to talk to someone more interested on his phone.”

The answer came out meaner that he meant, but he couldn’t help it. He wanted Danny all to himself, at least for a few hours, and knowing that someone was not only looking at him naked but he would also probably get to see Danny in person like that, was enough for Roy to want to punch something or someone.

Danny was still clueless. He raised his head from Roy’s shoulder, confused, but at least he put his phone away.

“What did I do? It’s something I said, isn’t it?”

Roy shook his head. He was drunk, but not enough to just put all the blame on Danny… even if he seen him way more guilty than before. He thought that the younger one didn’t have any kind of respect for how Roy felt towards him, he would always sleep around and then brag about it later - he didn’t care if he never told Danny about it. It had to be obvious how much Roy liked Danny, at least in his mind. He would never take care of someone as much as he did with Danny, at the point where he would get up during the night just to pick him up when Danny called him, drunk and in need of a lift. There was nothing he wouldn’t do to help him.

“No. I just don’t want to think about another idiot looking at your ass and jacking off to it.”

He growled, raising a hand just to put some distance between Danny and himself. The more he thought about it, the more he didn’t like the idea, the more he got angry. That’s why Roy didn’t like to drink too little - he just got meaner than usual. He either didn’t drink or drank enough to pass out.

Danny looked at him with his big green eyes, surprised by his answer… and then smirked. He fucking smirked and Roy hated it so much he was ready to punch him right on the nose.

“What’s so funny about it?”

He said after a few seconds, with the same tone as before. Danny didn’t look scared, he actually looked pleased. He even tried to get closer to him, but Roy wasn’t having it, pushing him lightly on the chest so he wouldn’t get too close. Danny pouted, and the fact that he was taking so lightly something that made Roy so angry was even more upsetting to the older man.

“So, you’re angry because a guy is interested in me?”

The way his voice was purring was distracting, but Roy was still way too angry to care. He crossed his arms on his chest, letting out an annoyed snort, and he even looked away. He felt so stupid, as soon as Danny said those words - it sounded like Roy was a stupid child instead of a grown ass man.

Danny didn’t like the silence. He grabbed Roy by the chin, forcing him to look back at him. As soon as he did so, he was met with two green eyes that were clearly having way too much fun for his taste.

“So, am I right or not?”

“Yes. No. Fuck, I don’t know - I just don’t like it, okay? And I don’t want to hear about it. Actually, I don’t even wanna see your nudes on the internet for everyone to see, but it’s not like you’re gonna stop anytime soon, no?”

He blurted out everything in a matter of seconds, so fast he wasn’t even sure Danny would catch everything - and it wasn’t like he actually wanted him to know, it was just a way for Roy to be able to be honest with himself, and simply stop having that weight on his shoulders. He didn’t look at Danny, snorted again and stubbornly looked away again, acting as a fool the entire time. Surely, if they ever had that conversation, that wasn’t the way he wanted to handle it. It was too late now, he guessed. Now Danny was probably gonna be pissed: he could already picture him getting up, telling him he was too controlling and possessive and that it was freaking him out, and then their friendship was gonna be ruined forever. Good job Roy, he thought to himself. There was no one that could mess his own life as good as he did.

But when he felt a weight on his legs and he found Danny on his lap, his arms already around Roy’s neck, he suddenly found himself at a loss of words. He didn’t have the time to react or anything, though: Danny chuckled, and his eyes were full of pure lust - and Roy was way too weak to be able to push him away, especially after waiting years for being looked in that way from him.

“You’re so cute when you’re jealous.”

That was the last thing he heard before getting dragged in the most heated kiss he ever received. Danny’s mouth was over his, then his tongue made its way in Roy’s mouth and all he could do was shiver, hold Danny closer and kiss him back as hard as he could. Roy still couldn’t believe it was happening: he thought about kissing Danny way too many times, but it was never like this. This was wild, tongue and teeth and hands everywhere - this was just perfect. There was nothing in his mind but Danny, the way he whimpered against his mouth when Roy’s hands squeezed his ass, his hands in Roy’s hair. It was a moment completely out of time and space.

But when they stopped and Roy was able to look in Danny’s eyes again, he didn’t even let himself catch his breath; his brain was moving way too fast, realizing that maybe that wasn’t anything Danny wouldn’t do with anyone else, that maybe he was just horny after days without sex and so on.

“Okay, what was that for?”

He asked, his breath a little faster than before - but he tried to focus on what that actually meant more than the act itself. He didn’t want to gets his hopes up, not so soon at least.

Danny giggled, sliding a little lower so he could place his chin on Roy’s chest. He looked like the cat that finally got the canary.

“For being jealous, of course. I can’t believe it worked! I owe Shane twenty bucks now.”

He added, pouting a bit. At that point, Roy was just confused, but it took him very little to understand what happened. He frowned, glaring at Danny.

“Did you two bet about this? Seriously? I thought you were better than that.”

His annoyed voice was cut out by another kiss. This time it was way more gentle, a quick kiss that had only their lips involved and nothing more. Danny then shook his head, a softer smile just for Roy.

“No, not in that sense- I just.. well, this is embarrassing…”

He mumbled, but as soon as he saw Roy’s serious face and he understood the other one wasn’t gonna cut him some slack, he sighed and continued.

“I didn’t think you were interested in me. I talked to Shane about this, and he was sure you were, even if I didn’t believe him… so he challenged me. He said that if I kept posting nudes, you’d get jealous and snap back. I didn’t think it would actually happen, but here we are.”

Roy raised his eyebrows, at a loss of words. He was gonna kill Shane first of all, of course: that was surely a dumb idea. Why not talk about it instead of playing with his emotions? This wasn’t a movie, they were real people and Roy found the strategy to be childish.

At the same time, though, he was happy. He still didn’t want to think too much of it, mostly because Danny didn’t say anything about liking him in a romantic way - he was a free spirit, it was nothing new for him to sleep with his friends. Danny didn’t even shy away from telling Roy he found him attractive, but that never escalated until that moment… and Roy didn’t want to be just one of the many. He cared about Danny more than he cared about anyone else, and he hoped the younger one felt the same.

Danny was looking at him in complete silence. He was nervously biting his lips, and Roy almost made him stop with another kiss - but that wasn’t the moment.

“What do you mean by ‘interested in you’?”

“Are you really gonna make me say it out loud?”

Danny complained, with a deep sigh once Roy simply nodded in response. Maybe he was being way too cautious, but after way too many heartbreaks, he couldn’t simply jump in the void without knowing if someone was gonna catch him on the other side.

“I like you. I always have, but there was this aura coming from you that told me you didn’t want anyone that close to you. It was painful, watching you being beautiful and perfect and shit like that and not being able to be by your side but as your friend. But now… it’s different. Isn’t it? Please tell me that you kissed me back because you like me as well.”

His voice changed during the whole thing - he was begging him. Danny was begging him, to like him back, to not destroy his heart… and Roy still couldn’t believe it, but as soon as he saw his big eyes filled with fear, he couldn’t help but give him a soft smile.

“You fucking idiot. Why would you orchestrate something like this - posting nudes all the time just waiting for me to react - instead of talking to me directly? This is much better. And way more healthy.”

He added, caressing his cheek with a different feeling than usual. He was relieved, and it was finally starting to kick in that Danny actually liked him and for as long as Roy did. The only thing that was bothering him at that point was that they wasted a lot of time… but as soon as Danny’s face lit up, that wasn’t a problem anymore. There was nothing he cared about more than seeing that smile on his face, especially when he knew he was the one that made him that happy.

“Hold on, you’re not kidding right? You like me?”

“You fucking idiot, why would I joke about that?”

Danny laughed in response, a happy laugh that could be heard from miles away probably - and it was all for him, only for him. He gave him more kisses, way more enthusiastic than any of the ones they exchanged before, but soon they became heated, and Roy could feel Danny’s breath getting heavier against his lips. After all, they both waited for so long, it wasn’t a surprise that both of them needed definitely more than a few kisses to feel satisfied.

“I am so happy I could die, really, but right now I just need--”

“Bed. I know. I need it too.”

He whispered against his lips. Danny smirked, tightening the grasp of his legs around Roy’s hips while the older one, even if with some difficulties, managed to get up and lead him to the bedroom.

Roy wasn’t sure where they were gonna go from there, but one thing was for sure: he would make sure to make a fuss about every damn picture Danny posted of himself naked if it made him as hungry as he was that night.

___________________________

“So, no more nudes now?”

Danny asked him, his head resting on Roy’s chest. It was late, they didn’t know how much, but it didn’t matter in that moment. Roy stroked his hair, massaging his scalp until Danny sighed happily at the sensation, closing his eyes.

The older one raised an eyebrow; now that he was definitely more calm, holding the person that was now his partner, naked and warm, he was embarrassed with the way he behaved. He wasn’t a teenager, he was a grown man that knew what boundaries were - and he didn’t have any right to tell Danny what to do.

“That’s not up to me to decide. It’s your life, your body.”

Danny looked at him confused for a second. He held Roy’s hand, placing it on the older man’s stomach.

“But I thought-”

“What? That I wouldn’t let you keep posting pictures like those?”

Danny simply nodded, making Roy sigh. This is what he feared the most; he didn’t want to become the reason for Danny not to be himself. He already saw what that could do to any relationship: it would become toxic, and the last thing he wanted was to hurt Danny in any kind of way.

“That’s not my decision to make, sweetheart. Do you enjoy taking those pictures?”

Another nod. Roy took it as a sign he could continue.

“Then keep doing it. I trust you, I just want you to be happy - and if that makes you happy, keep doing it. I was way out of line today… and I wanted to apologize for that.”

Danny got up, still looking confused like a puppy. He would look cute if Roy wasn’t worried about how he came across a few hours before - so he sat down instead of lying on the bed, waiting for Danny to say something.

“So you’re not mad anymore for the pictures?”

“No, and I shouldn’t have been in the first place. We weren’t in a relationship, first of all - and yes, even if you tried to get my attention, it’s still not right for me to get so mad at you. I will do better from now on; we’re a team, I support you and you support me. There’s no place for toxic jealousy.”

Danny smiled, leaning on to kiss him tenderly. It had been a few hours since the first one, but Roy still didn't have enough of them. He kissed him back before he decided to hold him close, just as before.

“Alright. If you ever act like an asshole again, I will tell you.”

“Good. And if it ever happens again, you have the permission to make fun of me.”

The eyes of the younger one suddenly lit, and a smirk that Roy knew too well was suddenly making its way on his face. He answered rolling his eyes, even if then he couldn’t help but smile.

“And you won’t talk back?”

“I won’t talk back.”

“Wow. You will regret this.”

Danny said with a laugh, that made Roy laugh as well. He really doubted he would regret anything that was happening in that moment, especially once Danny decided they needed to sleep and dragged him back to lie on the bed. Roy was actually relieved they had that talk, and when he closed his eyes, he couldn’t think of anything but how much he was looking forward to the next day, and the next one and the next one again.

[warriorqueen1991]

Memoria (pt. Three)

Characters: Sam X Claire (OC) Warnings: angst, fluff, mentions of suicide, self harm, dark thoughts, sorry... Sam is not in a good head space right now :( Notes: Sorry for no cut, the option is unavailable on my phone :( -------------------------------------- Claire wasn't sure how long they had been sitting there. Sam’s breathing had long since calmed down but he remained motionless. She knew he needed to take his time but she couldn't fight the pain developing in her chest at his emotional state. Taking a deep breath she tilted her head down to his hunched over form. “Sam...are you ok?” she questioned softly, his head turning to her slightly so that his face rested on his arms placed firmly on his bent knees. Claire frowned at his wrecked appearance, his beautiful hazel eyes red and his face blotchy from crying. He looked ready to pass out from the exhaustion, his hair tossed and sticking up in different directions. She couldn't stop her eyes from misting over, “Sam, I am so sorry” taking a shaky breath she continued “ I shouldn't of pushed you...it was stupid...I...” “ss’ok” Sam mumbled his mouth still half covered by his sweater. Smiling weakly Claire leaned her head back against the wall her eyes drifting back to him in concern “is your head ok?” Sam grumbled something as he shrugged his shoulders. Claire furrowed her brow as she gently examined the back of his head gasping as her fingers ran through a patch of his sticky blood. “Jesus Sam, I've gotta get this cleaned up” she said getting to her feet quickly, her heels clicking on the floor as she swung his door open before disappearing down the hall. Sam watched her leave, waiting until his door slammed shut before taking a few deep breaths carefully extending his right leg out. His eyes snapped shut as let out a deep painful groan. The doctors had told him his leg injury would of been a relatively easy fix, but unfortunately his wound had been left unattended for too long. According to them it had been a fucking mess when they wheeled him in. He distinctly remembered the words “overflowing with infection” and “permanent damage” had been used. He guessed in the end he should just be happy to still have the damn thing. Growling as a loud bang jerked Sam out of his thoughts,he opened his eyes slightly before sliding them back shut as Claire burst back into his room holding a small white bag with a red Cross on it. Grunting quietly he began moving his ankles and toes around to get the blood circulating. Claire smiled when she saw Sam had moved from his previous spot, even if it was only his legs, it was still a good sign. Both of his long limbs were extended out in front of him as he opened his eyes to watch her make her way to his side of the bed. She couldn't help but let out a quiet giggle as he wiggled his toes, she watched her footing carefully since was practically tip-toeing around his legs to sit on its edge. The bed made a couple loud squeaks as she sat down, her fingers gripping the bag tightly as she took a deep breath. The sound of Sam shifting on the floor snapping her out of it while fiddling absentmindedly with the bag, Claire cleared her throat as she unzipped it's top, grabbing out a few items before placing it roughly by her side. Sam and Claire’s eyes finally met when she spoke, “It... uh would probably be easier to work up here” she said patting the spot next to her with a few solid taps. Sam nodded wincing slightly when he pushed his weight against the wall in attempt to gain some leverage, his leg refusing to cooperate causing him to let out a small pained sound before sliding back to the floor. Sighing he looked to her then back at his leg “uh...could you..” he held his hand out to her dropping his gaze. Claire stared at him for a brief second before gasping shaking her head at her rudeness “oh of course, god I'm so sorry” she got to her feet grasping his rough hand letting his long fingers wrap around her smooth skin “I wasn't thinking Sam, sorry” he grunted as he was pulled back to his feet, limping with a slight jerk as he shifted his weight to his good leg. “You know you apologize an awful lot? “ his voice was rough but she could tell he was poking fun at her. Claire smiled “sor..” Sam cocked his eyebrow as her hand came to her mouth a small laugh escaping her smooth lips. “I'll try to work on that” she couldn't help the slight blush that spread across her cheeks. Sam smirked settling down on the hard mattress turning his back to her as she moved in behind him. Claire sat up straighter, damn he was tall. She shifted slightly in attempt to reach his wound to no avail. “uh...Sam..” he jerked slightly as she gently placed her hands in his hair “can I..?” with a slight pull she ushered him to lean back. Sam let out an uncomfortable sigh but allowed her to work, his eyes falling shut as Claire dabbed the alcohol swab against his broken skin. He could handle the slight pain her attention to his wound brought. What bothered him was the fact he couldn't deny how much he was enjoying the feeling of her fingers running through his hair. Claire apologized quietly when she picked up on his subtle twitches and face ticks as she finished cleaning up the small cut on his head. “There ya go” she sighed, her nails scratching his scalp slightly as she ran her hand through his hair once more before giving his shoulder a gentle tap. Sam took a deep breath before sitting up straight turning his body so that he was sitting next to her. “You ok?” her voice was soft like she was afraid of spooking a,wild animal. Sam nodded wondering exactly how many times she was gonna ask that before answering “I'm fine”. Claire smiled “it's not too deep” she gestured toward his head “should be healed up in no time”. He nodded once again glancing over to her, his eyes heavy as he forced a small smile “thanks” Claire was cursing herself in her head, how could she of been so stupid? She shouldn't of pushed him. She could see him sinking further into himself and she had no idea how to drag him back out. Sam was just staring at the floor his eyes sliding shut from exhaustion. Claire wanted to let him rest but knew it was a bad idea due to his head wound even if it was superficial. “Sam, I know your episodes are getting worse, your repressed memories are surfacing”. Sam’s eyes parted slightly as she continued. “it's gonna be hard for you to catch yourself if you get triggered, but I need you to try something for me ok?” Sam looked at her nodding making her smile gently “anytime your breathing increases I need you to focus on an object in the room and concentrate on it. Then I need you to try and gain control back over your breathing by taking deep breaths ok” she placed her hand on her stomach “make sure they're deep belly breaths ok not just chest breaths, you know what I mean?”. Sam nodded once running his hand over his scruff “ok”. He was hurting, she could see it “Sam it's gonna be ok, I promise...if you can gain control over your episodes you're one step closer to understanding your memories”. He ran his long fingers through his disheveled hair before giving a short snort of disbelief “what's the point?” Claire eyed him her mouth opening to reply before he cut her off “there's no happy ending for me” Sam’s voice was soft but rumbled like thunder. Claire blinked in confusion “What do you mean?” he dropped his hand to his thigh letting loose a rough exhale as he ran his tongue along his bottom lip before looking at her. Her heart clenched at the sadness she saw in his eyes “it's never gonna be better” he paused gesturing to himself “i’m...never gonna be better. I've tried, I've tried begging for forgiveness to whoever would listen” his voice was breaking, his breath shaky but the pain she could tell wanted to run down his cheeks remained within his tough exterior. He shook his head frowning deeply before looking to the floor “I've even tried…” he rubbed his right arm shifting uncomfortably “ending it”. Claire’s eyes widened she knew he was depressed, that he wasn't dealing with his condition well, but she was never told about this. “Sam, I didn't know...I..” Sam held up his hand gesturing for her silence “don't!” she sighed looking at her hands before meeting his eyes when he spoke again “ it seems I'm destined to suffer, I've made peace with that...I deserve it”. Claire shook her head her hand bringing his attention down to there now intertwined fingers “stop saying that Sam, you don't know what you deserve. Memories are confusing and sometimes messy, but don't let them be damning”. Sam’s brow tensed his eyes remaining on their clasped hands “innocent men don't dream of slaughter doc”. Claire slid her right hand from his placing it gently on his scruffy cheek bringing his tauny gaze back to her “perspective in dreams change, for all we know you could've witnessed these atrocities and escaped it, that doesn't mean you were the cause”. Sam growled jerking his hands from her getting to his feet with a pained wince “No,” he was breathing heavy now his face burning with rage as his voice gained volume “everytime I close my eyes I see em, those people I killed” “Sam you don't..” without hesitation he grabbed the med kit from the bed slamming it against the wall sending the contents spilling out around them. Claire gasped jumping at his sudden outburst “I killed them!” he pressed his hand firmly on his chest “Me!!...every time I watch bullets rip through another human being it's me pulling that damn trigger”. Claire was shaking as she watched his rage boil over, she honestly didn't know what to expect. Sam was pacing like a caged animal limping heavily on his right leg “I just want it to stop” he growled he continued to pace back and forth when his gaze darted back to her he stopped his eyes taking in her posture. A haze of regret suddenly slid over his face. He wanted to apologize for his behavior but thought better of it. Perhaps scaring her off was the right thing to do, she didn't deserve this. To be dragged down into his darkness. Sam sighed running his hand through his hair grabbing the back of his head before kneeling painfully on the floor as he began picking up the medical supplies he had strewn about. His head was pounding, weather it was from his altercation with the wall or all the yelling he wasn't sure. But damn he felt like he just ran a marathon and got hit by a car at the finish line. Claire watched as he got to his knees fighting the urge to usher him back to his feet, the position had to be painful. “Sam” when he didn't acknowledge her she got down on the cold floor with him, grabbing the empty medkit. Sam sighed placing the few objects he had in his large hands into the bag reaching forward to grab a pair of scissors in front of Claire not realizing she too had reached for it. “Fuck!” Sam growled as their heads bumped together, wincing Claire rubbed her forehead as she plopped down on her backside. “Shit...sorry” Sam grumbled rubbing his head before offering her the scissors. Claire snorted a laugh covering up her mouth in embarrassment at the sound. “I'd apologize but I wouldn't want to over do it” she laughed taking the offered scissors and placing em in the bag. Sam watched her a moment, why was she not mad at him? This woman was something else, she had every reason to deem him violent and unstable. But instead she was patient and caring, he didn't deserve her. But...he didn't want to lose her either, for the first time since waking up Sam didn't feel alone. He promised to let her try didn't he? What the hell did he have to lose at this point? Sooner or later she would come to her sinces and flee the all consuming black hole he is, so why not enjoy it while it lasts.Sam felt a weight leave his chest at his decision. Claire would leave, that much was certain. Sam would then fall back into the awaiting abyss and finally end this hell. At least this way he could maybe have some good memories to dull the pain. Finally Sam had some control, he couldn't help but let a small smile pull at his lips as he looked into her green eyes “you've apologized enough dont’cha think?” Claire met his gaze not wanting to point out that he was genuinely smiling at her, but not wanting to miss it either. “So it's your turn then?” she asked sitting Indian style by his bed while he remained on his knees. He nodded wincing slightly as he shifted off his right knee, “sorry for throwing shit, and for uh...for scaring ya” his voice was deep and raspy “I feel like a damn fish outta water here” Claire nodded “you know feeling aggravated and lost is normal Sam, but I am trying to help you here, I can't do that if you continue to shut me out”. Sam dropped his barely there smile for a defeated sigh as he nodded “I know...and...I do appreciate it” he met her gaze once more “really” Claire continued to smile softly at him getting to her feet, grabbing the bag before offering him her hand. Sam gave another short smile before letting her assist him. Slowly they made their way to his door “are you gonna be ok Sam?” her voice was laced with worry as she turned to face him. He looked surprised at the question before nodding, Claire returned the nod gripping the handle of the door before turning back to him “I'm gonna try and see if they will let me take you outside for a couple sessions, maybe cheer ya up some”. Sam let his dimples show briefly as he ran his hand through his messy hair tugging on his earlobe gently “thank you” he sighed wrapping his arms around his torso “will I see you tomorrow then?” Claire shook her head “I actually have a mandatory meeting tomorrow” Sam frowned, he didn’t want to be alone again, two days with this woman and he already felt lost without her. Claire noticed his smile disappear “I'm sorry Sam, I'll come by afterwards I promise...if only to say hi to my friend” she winked patting him on the shoulder. Sam smiled but his mind was drifting, what the hell was he gonna do? Without Claire he would be left with his thoughts...and his demons. “I'll see you tomorrow Sam I promise” he watched as she shut the door behind him leaving him to his four walls once again. Slowly he limped to his bed stopping just short of his mattress when his eyes caught the glint of something by the leg of his bed. Bending over slightly he grabbed the object turning it over in his hand. He glared down at the stainless steel scalpel, his mind drifting to its dark corners before he quickly shoved it under his mattress. Sam closed his eyes taking deep controlled breaths opening them once again. Flipping off his lights he flopped down on his bed sighing heavily. Just one day, that's it. One day without her. --------------------------------------- THANK U SO MUCH FOR READING ♡♡♡♡ TAG LIST~ please let me know if u wanna be tagged :) @zoesmama2024 @fuck-yeah-lets-do-negan-ff @noodlecupcakes @dixonsbait @ashzombie13 @artemisxeros @chunex @magikat409 @memphisgirl1977 @jdmfanfiction @jdms-network @hereforthejeffrey

[kpoptart216]

My North Star (pt 10)

A/N: I really want this series to end soon. And so it shall. I’m thinking pt 12 will be the end. Look forward to it! Let me know if you want a part 11?? what do you y’all think of the series so far? I love hearing back from you guys, otherwise I don’t really have any motivation to write omg.

Genre: Angst, angst, some more angst. Oh I guess some fluff?

Pairing: Jin x Reader (ft. Hoseok)

Summary: You were in love with your best friend, the one constant in your life. But what happens when a new girls comes along? And a new guy tries to win your heart?

Previous parts: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Jin wouldn’t- couldn’t, leave you. As soon as the ambulance reached you, it felt like the medics were taking you away from him forever. He begged the medics to take him along with them in the ambulance and they let him sit alongside you.

He held your hand throughout the entire ride and kept saying how sorry he was. How he wanted to turn back time. How it should be him laying there instead of you. How much he loved you and how much he just wanted you to be ok.

When you finally reached the hospital after what seemed to be ages, the medics immediately pulled you out and wheeled you into the OR. The nurses had to pry Jin off of you, telling him over and over that he couldn’t go any further. His knees finally gave out and he slouched against the wall outside the OR, his sobs getting louder and louder.

After over an hour, he finally was starting to come back to his senses and was calling everyone he could think of. He called his family first and explained the situation through his crying. Though they were quite a bit aways, they promised to be there as soon as possible. Once he hung up, he knew he had to call Hoseok. He hesitated to call, not knowing what to tell your boyfriend. But he knew he had to, and forced himself to call him finally.

“H-Ho-Hoseok ah...” he began.

“Hey, Jin! Have you seen Y/N? She’s not answering her phone!” Hoseok answered back. Jin’s throat never felt more dry. 

“H-Hoseok ah. S-S-She...Y/N g-got in-into an a-accident” Jin said, sobbing again. All the guilt boiled over Jin again, knowing that this was all his fault.

“W-what?” Hoseok said after a few seconds. “It’s...It’s not bad right?” he continued. When Jin didn’t answer, Hoseok knew. “W-where are you right now?” he finally asked.

And before Jin knew it, Hoseok was running down the hallways of the hospital, frantically searching for you. Once Hoseok saw Jin slouched up on the wall, Hoseok’s eyes widened at the sight in front of him. Jin’s white shirt was stained with blood everywhere. Even his hands contained your dried blood. But what was worse was the way Jin looked. He looked lifeless, as if the blood on his shirt was his own. 

Hoseok carefully walked up to Jin. “Jin, what happened?” he asked, as tears formed in his eyes.

Jin couldn’t even look up, the guilt overwhelming every fiber of his body. “She...She got hit....hit by a car” Jin said finally. Hoseok flinched at his words. 

“How bad is it?” he asked. 

“I don’t know. She’s been in surgery for over 2 hours, and they haven’t said anything” Jin said. He wanted to rip the doors of the OR open and find the nearest surgeon and ask what was going on. But at the same time, he didn’t want to know, fearing the worst.

At that moment, Jin’s family also arrived. Jin was bombarded with questions, and he didn’t know how long he could keep answering the same questions. Each time he tried to answer, he imagined your lifeless body and it flinched everytime he thought back to that moment.

All of a sudden, the door to the OR opened. “Is the family of Y/N here?” he asked, almost too quietly. 

Everyone turned to the surgeon, not even realizing he had emerged from the room. “We’re her family” said Yuna. 

The doctor walked up to everyone as Jin finally stood up, eyes wide open. 

“Ah, you must be the young man who brought her in” he said. 

“ah..yes. H-How is s-she” Jin asks.

The next few seconds felt like an eternity. The doctor looked around the entire group, holding his silence.

“She lost a lot of blood and she quite a few broken bones. There were times when we thought we were going to lose her during the surgery...” the surgeon begins and Jin could feel what little blood he had in his face drain.

“...but she made it through.” the doctor continued. Jin stared at the surgeon, almost not believing his words.

“So..so she’s ok?” Hoseok asks finally.

What little smile the surgeon had faded as soon as the question was asked.

“She’s been stabalized for now. She took quite a bit of damage to her head. I’m afraid she’s fallen into a coma. I wish I could tell you when she would wake up, or if she will at all, but that’s not in my hands. We’ll transfer her to another room and you can visit her soon. I want you all to prepare your minds” he said, finally walking away.

Hours passed and the entire group sat in silence as they waited for you to be transferred, to another room. Eventually, you were, and Jin’s family were the first to go in and see you. They spent a few minutes inside, praying for your speedy recovery. Hoseok went in after, wanting to spend a few minutes alone. 

He held your hand as tears fell freely from his face. He wished for nothing more than for you to wake up and smile at him again. For you guys to spend your three month anniversary, and the many more to come. He wept quietly, as if the crying would disturb you. Eventually, he couldn’t face you any longer and he too left the room, going to fill out any paperwork that was left.

Jin stood outside your room, not being able to go inside. He couldn’t. He put his hand on the door handle, but couldn’t move it. He couldn’t see you through the small window in the door, and he knew he couldn’t go another minute without seeing you, though. He finally opened the door and walked in slowly.

The second he laid his eyes on you, he dropped to the floor in uncontrollable sobs. There you laid, on the bed. With various things hooked up to you as you breathe in and out slowly. When you should have been out having a good time, smiling that radiant smile of yours, here you were, in the hospital bed. It killed Jin to see you like this. He held your hand, finally clean from all the blood. He tried to make coherent words, but his sobbing didn’t help. He filled the room with his sorry’s and I love you’s, but he knew nothing would help in waking you up.

Eventually, Jin’s family had to literally drag him out of the room. It killed them to see him like this, but they knew the only thing to help him was you waking up.

3 MONTHS LATER

A lot had happened in the last three months. Jin went through a nasty breakup with Kim after finally facing her after he first left the hospital. She felt bad for her actions though as she never once thought that you would end up the way you did. Though she loved Jin, she knew she had no right in trying to fight for him.

Eventually, Jin also told Hoseok about what really went down that night. Hoseok was furious, to say the least. In the midst of Hoseok yelling at Jin, he accidently revealed how you had truly felt about Jin all these years. He hadn’t meant to, but the second the words passed through his lips, he felt a huge weight off of his shoulders.

“Now that you know how she felt, you two should sort whatever it is between you two whenever she wakes up. We all deserve that much, especially her.” Hoseok says. 

Hoseok tried to visit you every chance he got, hoping that you got better. The doctors were quite impressed with how quickly you were healing, but there was no difference when it came to you waking up. You still just laid there.

Jin on the other hand, visited you every day. Every day, he brought some of your favorite things in hopes that you would wake up. And if you woke up, you would wake up to something pleasant. But you showed no sign of waking up. He always held your hand, and brushed the hair off of your face. He would tell you how much he loved you and how much he wanted you to wake up. He kept telling you that once you woke up, there was no way in hell that he was ever letting you go again. Not ever again.

Eventually, a fourth month passes. Jin still visits you everyday, but one day he gets a call from work. “Jin, we’ve been lenient with you thus far, but if you don’t go on this business trip, I can’t guarantee your job.” his boss said, quickly getting to the point. Jin’s brother had to literally force him to leave, assuring him that he would notify him if anything were to change with you. 

The day before leaving on the trip, Jin walked in at night with a bouquet of your favorite flowers. He placed them in a small glass vase and put it on the small table beside you. He kissed your forehead lightly. Please wake up Y/N, I can’t live seeing you like this. 

He walked out of the room with heavy steps, not wanting to leave you for an entire two weeks. 

You had once found comfort in the darkness that soon enveloped you once you had been hit by that car, but that very darkness was now scaring you. You had thought that once you died, you would be reunited with your parents, but you were alone. You kept walking in the darkness with only your thoughts to accompany you. 

You remember everything vividly. You wanted to scream, but no sounds came out. You wanted to move, but your body failed to do so. So with no other choice, you sat in the darkness, all alone. 

Please don’t be so cruel to me, God.

After spending what seemed like a lifetime in that darkness, you one day felt different. You felt...ready. Your eyes fluttered open, only to be blinded with the sunlight coming in through the windows. You look to the other side, noticing that you were laying in an empty room.

 Am I dreaming? 

You just lay there, trying to understand what happened. The last thing you remember was laying in the street with someone holding you as they yelled your name. But the next second, here you were, laying on the bed. You look down to see the rest of your body and thankfully you still had all your limbs. You almost smiled, thinking about how dramatic you were being, as if you were in some movie. 

As you continue to look around the room, you hear the door open and turn your head in the direction. 

“Y/N! You’re awake! ” Hoseok almost yells as he runs to your side. He cupped your face and looked at you intently, not believing his eyes. 

“Hi” was all you could manage to say. You were happy to see him, and you were confused as per why he seemed as if you had suddenly grown a tail or something. “I’ll go get the doctors!” he said, running back out.

What’s happening?

You try and think back to what happened last night and immediately you’re filled with sadness. You remember all the harsh words exchanged and how you managed to end up in a crazy car accident. You pull your hands to your head as your head seems like it’s going to split from the pain. 

Tears form in your eyes, but you weren’t sure if it was because of the pain or from the memories. 

The doctor was pleasantly surprised when he found you awake. He talked about what to do from here on out, especially some physical therapy. For the most part, you were ok. He just wanted to run some tests and keep you for a few more days before you could be discharged.

Hoseok was by your side the entire time, making sure to understand each word that left the doctor’s mouth. As soon as the doctor left, he pulled out his phone. “I should probably tell Jin and his family that you’re awake. They have been waiting for months” he says.

“...Months? How long have I been out?” you ask, shocked.

“Y/N, sweetheart, you’ve been asleep for over four months now.” he says as he places his hand on top of your head. 

“oh. It all just feels like it happened in a day” you said. But then you took a moment to really look at yourself. You turned to the small body length mirror and were shocked by how much weight you had lost. How tired you looked. 

“Wow..” you say looking at the mirror. 

“You’re still beautiful” Hoseok says with a smile.

As you continue to look at the mirror, you realize that Hoseok was about to call Jin and that you were in no way or form ready to face him just yet. It might have been four months since the accident happened, but to you, it was only a matter of a few hours. You didn’t want to see Jin now or any time soon, not after what he said.

“Hoseok, don’t call Jin or his family. Please, I can’t see him just yet” you let out.

“But...Y/n he deserves to know that you’re awake. He feels terrible about everything. He’s been here more than I have” he said with a sad smile. 

“p-please” was all you could muster back. You were still very tired and you didn’t have it in you to sit there and argue with Hoseok.

“as you wish” he said, placing his phone down.

A/N: Okay, so I really hope to finish this by part 12. Hope y’all liked this part~ please let me know! do y’all want a part 11?? Can’t wait to finish this series off omg. sorry for all the mistakes, I don’t edit these omg i’m so lazy.

[pa-awesome]

Small Lies That Escalated Into “This Is My Life Now”

• I'm disabled. I use two crutches to walk. When I'm not actually hobbling along it's one of those disabilities that can be mistaken for just having a broken leg or something. People frequently ask me "What did I do to need those crutches?" When I started university I told a girl that I cage-wrestled a bear. She was drunk and thought it was hilarious. I thought it was clear that I was completely obviously joking. There is no sane way I could have been serious. About three hours later I'm at the student union. Gareth Gates is singing (that one off pop Idol) I'm trying to take a picture of him, and I hear two girls in front of me: "Do you know why he's got those?" "Yeah he got mauled by a bear or something" "Are you serious?" Several months later I have to go meet my partner for our placement study. I've never met her before in my life, but she knows me already as the guy who got attacked by a bear. At Christmas I head home, (only a couple of hours away) and meet up with some friends for drinks. "Turrabo, why the fuck are you telling everybody that you got mauled by a bear?"

• In college my roommate and I had a KFC taco bell right by our apartment. We would go once or twice a week. One time we ordered and the drive through guy said "hey bro, you're - i remember your car!" Since the name was the same as mine, I was like "hey man!" Apparently he thought we had both worked construction together - or he did with a guy who looked like me, drove the same car, and had the same name. Anyway, he ends up giving us our order to for free. From that day on, everytime we went to the taco bell - kfc, we got free food. He would even tell his coworkers to give us free food and would throw in comments like - "you remember steve, he was a real asshole". I would agree and then accept my food. My roommate also apparently started getting free food even when I wasn't there because he recognized him. Doppleganger me must of been a super nice guy, because I got a lot of love. I lived that wonderful lie for roughly 3-4 years to get the free gorditas and fried chicken. I even got a new friend on facebook. Worth it.

• I told people at my former (American) university that I was Canadian, to get them to stop talking to me about U.S. politics. I hate confrontation and didn't know how to just tell them that political discussion makes me uncomfortable. Now I live in Canada and attend a Canadian university. I'm working towards citizenship. Oops.

• I've been making EDM since I was 13, and in my senior year of High School I had the opportunity to play some of my music live with Ableton for my classmates at an event. But, because I couldn't explain what I was doing in the space provided on the sign-up sheet I just put down "DJ", thinking that nobody would be knowledgeable enough to know the difference. Apparently everybody liked it so much that the prom committee asked me to DJ prom, and like an idiot I said yes. I waited for my birthday, and made sure that nobody got me any gifts-just money, which I spent on software and a Mixtrack Pro. I learned how to DJ in three months, did prom, got payed 250$. I'm making decent money off of gigs now, and I do the prom every year.

• When I was little, my grandma would make me these horrible frozen chicken tenders filled with cheese. They were just god-awful. Because I am a good grandson, I told her that I loved them. From then on, every time that I visited her, she would cook me those abominations. Even when I was in graduate school, I would go visit her and for one meal, I would have to slide those gross things down my gullet. Every time I would say, "Thanks! I love them!" The things we do for love...

• I was having a rough time commuting too far for work for a few months. Decided to quit to find something closer to home, but told everyone I had been approved to work from home. When I went to give my two weeks, my manager asked, "I know the driving has been killing you, how would you feel about working from home?" Work laptop to my left and watching Great British Masterclass as I type, been working at home since then.

• My upstairs neighbor called me Mark in a conversation but since that is not my name, I didn't realize she was actually referring to me so I didn't correct her. The second time she called me Mark it was from a distance as she was leaving her apartment and I was getting in; I registered that she thought my name was Mark but I felt it would be weird to shout back that my name is not Mark. The third time she did this I had a bunch of friends over on the stoop outside the apartment and I didn't want to correct her in front of a group of kids (she's an older lady; we were in our early twenties) because I didn't want to embarrass her. All my friends looked confused that she was calling me Mark but after she went inside I explained to them I was too deep into it to correct her. They disagreed since she had only done it three times at that point. That was 7 years ago. I am Mark.

• Buddy of mine shared this one. He told his wife's parents he liked their Christmas ham at the first family function he was invited to. They took that as he loved ham in general. Ten years later it's the only food they have at any meal where it's him, wife and kids and the inlaws. They have dinner twice a month, it's always ham. They send him ham-centric gift baskets every year on his birthday at work. Every holiday it's ham, ham, ham, at every meal. They took a 3 hour detour last year to get a picture of some sign in Ham Lake MN or a postcard or something and thought he'd be so excited when they sent him the photo. It's like they only ever learned one fact about him and it was he likes ham. At this point I'm not sure they remembered his name and heartily pat him on the back referring to him a their ham-loving son in law because they're too embarrassed to ask ten years in and employ complex, Leslie-Nielsen-level schemes to get someone to steal his wallet or get someone to say his name that always fail. He hates ham, always has, its too salty and makes his hands swell up so much his wedding ring can't be removed. His wife now hates ham. He was just being polite. We're attending a christening of their kid next weekend and I'll get to meat the inlaws in question. I will be asking them if they love ham as much as he certainly does. I want to know if everyone in the family hates ham and they're all just smiling while dying on the inside at every meal, passing the ham with anger boiling like a pot of hot ham water just under surface. So yeah that's his life right now, forced to eat ham because he lied about liking ham and he's in too deep.

• People picked on my brother in high school for getting jumped by some wannabe “blood” thugs in the bathroom. Popular thugs, if you can believe it. It was relentless. His confidence and any friendships were crushed, cause, you know, people can’t be seen with the loser. One day I was confronted by said thugs, basically talking shit about my brother, and in my infinite wisdom, I said I could box so they better back off. Something to that affect. Looking back, I cringe, but you do what you have to. Needless to say, they did not back off. Somehow, I landed a punch on one of the kids that dislocated his jaw. Like, flapping around like a mouth piece hanging from a football helmet. I became the kid who could “box” but never wanted to fight, which I guess gave me credibility. I don’t really know. Everyone and their hyena came to me asking where they could learn said boxing skills, how I’d learned by 16, all that crap. I’d wanted to just come out and say I had been lucky, but I didn’t want anyone to give my brother shit again. So the lie stayed. Luckily, no one ever picked on my brother afterwards, and I did eventually learn some boxing fundamentals, but most because I felt like I was living a lie. Which I was. As a man, I have not had to keep up the facade.

• I moved to a new city, and got a new dentist. For some reason, the guy thinks I used to see him at his old practice in a town I've never lived in. I corrected him a couple times, but he just keeps bringing it up, so now I just kind of roll with it. He asks after my parents, which is easy enough...but we've had all kinds of conversations about local restaurants I've never been to and other random stuff like that.

• "Yea I'd say I'm pretty good with excel." No. No I wasn't. Annnnnnd now I'm an analyst at a fortune 400 company.

• My mother was a super control freak, so one of the ways I would avoid home was after school extracurriculars. I got the date wrong on a math team meeting, so I lied to my mom about it while actually attending the debate team intro meeting. I probably didn't need to lie, but it was always safer to not disrupt her precious schedule. Eventually, debate became a regular activity for me to avoid home. In 3 years, I was a state semifinalist and in college, I coached the high school national champions and turned that into a free ride for a masters degree.

• A new coworker of mine tried downplaying his bday and eventually after me hounding him about why he didn't like celebrating, he eventually told me in confidence that his best friend was killed on his birthday and he hates thinking about it. Fast forward 8 years -- this guy and I had become really good friends. Best friends. Lived together at one point. He was accepted into my friend group and I always made sure to downplay his bday (his is 4 days after another friend) so we just did a group thing and never made a big deal about it. Finally someone got brave enough and wanted to talk to him about it, and he laughed and had no recollection of telling me that and said he was probably just screwing with me. He always wondered why no one wished him happy bday.

• I moved to a new city when I was in 6th grade and on the same day I started two other boys started and they both knew how to skateboard, so I lied and said I did to. Then for months I lied about being able to skateboard to them and other kids at the school, and I never came clean because I didn't want anyone to call me a poser. So I bought skater boy clothes, and a skateboard and learned how to skateboard because I lied about knowing how to skateboard. Still skating since then. I'm 27 now.

• Once my boyfriends mom asked me if I liked their bathroom soap. It’s lavender, I don’t like lavender. But I decided to tell her “I love it, it smells so good!” Now I have an endless supply, she buys me some all the time. It’s too sweet to tell her the truth, so I just keep it to myself and use the mediocre-smelling soap. Oh well, this is how I live now

• My husband's best friend has a 6 year old daughter that I see often. When she was almost 3 she babbled something to me (I think it was "My friends here!") and my husband interpreted it as "My friend Steve!" and started calling me Steve in front of her. Now her whole family call me Steve when she's around, and she still believes that's my name. For clarity, I'm a female and my name isn't anything close to Steve.

• Back in High School, someone in my freshman English class thought he heard someone call me Louis, so he started calling me Louis. Not really a friend, just someone I spoke to on occasion. Now high school me thought he was just him trying to be funny, and didn't care to correct him and he continued to call me Louis and whenever I heard him call for me I responded. It wasn't until our last week of senior year that he stops me in his tracks and goes. "Someone told me your name isn't Louis. Is your name Louis?" "No." "I-I've been calling you Louis for 4 years! I thought that was your name!"

• "You're here for the copywriting position right?" "Yup!" I was the only one in the waiting area... thought I was there for a design/art direction role. Within 15 minutes of the interview they offered me $2K to move and $45K starting salary a week before graduation.

• My life, my dad's lie. He's a GP in the US and had an older Indian man as a patient. While they were chatting, at some point my dad mentioned that his sister loved elephants and had a collection of figurines. The patient went back to India to visit family, and he brought back a couple small carved elephants to my dad to give to me. He'd misunderstood/misremembered and thought it was his daughter who collected elephants. My dad thought it was a one time thing, thanked him, and said I'd love them. Turns out he went back to India every year. For ten years, I'd get a new elephant figurine whenever that patient had come back.

• Said I was a amateur boxer until a real fight popped off. guy was huge, I just put my hands up pretended I knew what I was doing, meanest face I could make. guy stood down, said "fuck that..you could tell he knows how to fight." I signed up to my nearest boxing gym the next day. I actually love it!

[littlebitlizbit]

Tinker... Where do I begin? With his spirit, his sass? His grumble meow, or his cooing purr? The crook at the top of his long broken tail, or his blown out oracle eye? There are so many feelings and emotions that his name brings up, and I hope that I have the words to get them out right...

So right, where do I begin? I guess at the beginning.

About two and a half years ago my household lost one of our cats to old age. Our other cat, Rufus, was never a huge fan of his late sibling, but he was still used to anothers cat’s company. I wanted to bring him in a new friend, but knew that financially it would be a stretch. I have a rare genetic disorder that gets in the way of full time work, and vet bills, especially for older cats, tend to add up... but still, Ruffie needed a companion.

I started to look online at some of the various animal rescues around the lower mainland, and stumbled across Katie’s Place. It is a no kill cat rescue, that offers a unique option for those looking to adopt.

It’s called the Permanent Foster Program. This program exists to get the most in need cats into a household asap. It applies to the senior cat’s, in Kate’s Place care, that have non life threatening issues. The hardest part about adopting out older cats is people’s concerns over vet bills, and this is where Katie’s place differs from most shelters... They work with vets who continue to see the cats for the remainder of their lives, and Katie’s Place covers any fees or medication costs.

I started looking through their cats available for adoption gallery, and finding out which ones were available for the PM program. There were at least three that could have been a good fit, so a friend and I headed out on one of their open house days to meet the candidates.

I remember thinking how smart of a set up they had, to house the rescues in a comfortable way. You pass through a safety gate and into a comfortably lit portable, with rooms running down either side of the hall, each with an connected covered patio. Instantly we were greeted by the “hall cats.” We entered the first room, that comfortably housed about 6 rescues. One of the PF cats was sleeping in her bed, and she perked up as I put my arm near her bed. She was a beauty white fluffy girl, who was sweet, but wasn’t a fan of other cats, so not the best fit. As we popped in and out of the rooms, I had my eye out for one named Smigeon, a black fluffy guy who sounded chill on the website. He was in one of the rooms towards the back, on the porch, a volunteer informed me. On the way through to him, my eye was draw to this miserable looking cat, with very obvious sight issues. He was bald and covered in scabs, raising his paw cautiously in front of himself from on top of a cage within a cage. There was something about him... but not wanting to startle him, I let him be, and continued through the door to find Smigeon snoozing utop a cat tree. He instantly rolled over and gave me the sweetest look and started purring at my pets. I was sold, and went to tell the woman in charge that I would like to take him. As I was petting some cats nearby her and another volunteer, I overheard the volunteer tearfully say “I don’t want him to die in here.” I went over and asked what was up, and was told that Smigeon came in with another cat, but this other cat was super sick, and had a stomach tumour, and wasn’t expected to last more than two weeks. I called home and asked my partner if he trusted me, and he said yes. I told him we were getting two cats. Turns out the mostly blind scabby guy was Smigeon’s old house mate. I knew that I could give him so much love in the time he had left, and though it would hurt, resigned myself to this short term guy. I was told to really have a think about it overnight, and was there the moment they opened the next day with carriers ready to bring them home.

It was as if this scabby cat, this Tinker, knew we were coming for him. He was off of his smaller cage, and at the mouth of his big one with his paw outstretched towards me the moment I walked in. My friend helped cage up Smigeon while I got Tinker into his. Smige fell asleep in his cage on the way home, while Tinker, sat half in his cage, half on my lap, staring either at me or out the window. He could see a bit...but not much.

And then the boys were home.

Smigeon pranced around the house like he was the happiest prince. He LOVED water, like would let the tap drip on his head he loved it so much (even tried to jump into the bath with me once.) Rufus was wary of Smigeon, there were a couple hisses, but for the most part didn’t seem to mind him.

Tinker was another story... the poor guy walked into walls and chairs, but could see at least a little bit and had great hearing. Rufus was mesmerized by him. Like he could tell that something was wrong with this guy, so wasn’t aggressive in the least bit. If Tinker hissed, Ruffie would just quietly sniff near him, and give him space.

That first night, all the cats were on the bed. Tinker couldn’t jump up on his own, so I made him a set of makeshift stairs, that he ended up being really good with. He then marched, with all the grumpy sass of an old man, onto my chest, and promptly curled himself around my neck, falling almost instantly and deeply asleep. I knew then and there that this cat had my heart, in a way that I’d never experienced before.

Sure, I’ve had some great cats, amazing cats, sweet silly cats. One of my favourite cats growing up was exceptional, Taz. He was a rescue, a smushed faced himalayan persian, who would jump from the floor up to my stomach then from stomach to shoulder and perch there. He’d give me kisses and hugs, sat on my lap every meal and whenever I was on a couch. He slept at my feet and used to love to sit on my chest and just stare at me, purring. He was the cat that made me fall in love with grumpy old man cats... but he has long since passed and I didn’t think I’d ever get that lucky again.

I was wrong.

As the days went by, Tinker thrived. Him and Rufus seemed to be bonding exceptionally fast, and he would devour any food that was put in front of him. He loved fresh water, and would drink loudly while padding the floor, and then would put his paw right into his mug. Oh yes, he drank out of a Batman mug, he wouldn’t drink out of a bowl, but the mug was his jam.

Smigeon, our clean, other than being older, bill of health kitty, on the other hand, was not doing well. No matter what I’d put down for him food wise, he wouldn’t eat. Not even fresh cooked meat or bacon. I started to “baby bird” him and would fill a thick syringe up with moist food, and feed him that way. He ate a tiny bit of dry food one day, and he’d drink tons of water. After a week I brought him and Tinker in for a check up, since Tinker’s skin condition didn’t seem to be getting any better, and Smigeon was getting weaker. Turns out Tinker, and now my house, had ringworm. But poor Smidge, the vet wanted to keep overnight, to see if he’d improve after being on an IV. I was called the next day by the vet, Dr.Gold, who told me that they did some more tests on Smigeon, and it turned out that his entire body was riddled with tumours. He was weak and in pain and the vet said there was nothing they could do, and that we needed to let him go. I rushed out in time to hold him, give him lots of loves and pets, as he crossed the rainbow bridge in my arms. It was hard, and unexpected, but I’m thankful that he at least got to have a final couple of weeks in a loving home.

He and Smigeon did not come from a safe/loving home. Tinker had scarring that showed not only a once broken tail, but also ribs. Some of his teeth were broken, and he wasn’t born blind, but one of his eye was completely blown out. Both cats were surrendered after a raid, completely matted and dehydrated. It boils my blood to think that some people can be so cruel...

Back home, now Rufus had contracted ringworm, and both Tinker and him had to be quarantined in the spare room, while we disinfected the entire house. Tinker was on cold meds, as well as ringworm meds, and it took me a few times to figure out the best way to administer it. He would go full on feral if I tried to pinch his mouth open at all, but the liquid meds seemed to be the easiest, while I held him with my arms and legs. Both boys had to get bathed once every 2 to 3 days for about two months, and we had to completely disinfect their room a couple of times a day.

During this time I would go, in my massive Batman onesie, and just lay down with them. Rufus was never big on pets and cuddles, but everytime Tinker would march straight up my chest, and lay claim to the real estate around my neck. My guess is that my breath on him from there was comforting, like he knew he was safe... The two boys became inseparable in that time, and Ruffie actually started to want tactile love. Rufus had never liked to sleep near any other cats, but the two of then now cuddled almost constantly.

Finally, after getting the final check/ok from the vets, the boys quarantine was over. (Funny side story, during that visit Tiker needed to have bloodwork done... I could hear him yowling down the hall, and when they brought him back in the vet tech was wearing a fully padded suit, and plastic neck and face guard. She basically threw him at me...poor feral guy, but was calm the second he was back in my arms) Tinker was the first out of the room, slowly but surely relishing in his new freedom. Rufus was a little more cautious upon exiting the room, but cautious is kind of his default.

Slowly but surely more of Tinker’s personality started to come out, as he blossomed. We’d now had him for about three months, and he was showing no signs of slowing down...in fact quite the opposite. After watching him one morning accurately swat at and chase a fly, I realized how good his hearing was. The pet store near me sold these crinkle balls, that made the slightest noise while being batted around. As soon as I dropped it for him, a new Tinker was unleashed. He chased and batted around that thing with the energy and accuracy of a kitten. I couldn’t believe it. Neither could the vet. On his next check up they were pleased at his weight gain, and the fact that his fur was starting to grow back in (the exact same shade as Rufus, who knew!?). His tumour wasn’t growing, but it also wasn’t shrinking, so he was put on some pain meds to make him a little more comfortable. He became even more active after that. It’s funny, he would sing, literally sing and coo to his crinkle ball wherever he would catch it and carry it around in his mouth all proud like. If he’d lose it under some furniture, we’d have to go on our hands and knees around the house to see what he lost it under, because he would cry if he couldn’t find it. Finally I bought him a pack of 12 online, so that if he lost it, we could just pop him out another. Well that didn’t work out.... turns out this one crinkle ball in particular was his baby, and no matter what, we couldn’t trick him into a different one.

As winter started to melt into spring, and we started to let Tinker out into the front yard. It’s completely fenced in, and I'd sit with him while he explored, sniffing everything he could, with a lust for life.

When I was home (Which was most of the time) he would be my constant shadow. I sew, as well as make jewelry, and whenever, wherever I had a project on the go, Tinker would be right there beside me. I ended up getting him these vintage stools covered in padded fabric, and he would snooze lazily on them beside me as I worked away, occasionally waking up for some fresh water and head pets. Him and Rufus were still super close, cuddling for hours every day, an absolute first for Ruffie. He adopted a small Batman stuffy of mine, and started cuddling with it daily. The days that I had to go to work, he would give me sass all morning (if I put on makeup that seemed to be the give away that I was going out) and then come trotting to the door, as fast as he could, upon arriving back home. He did this hilarious thing when he was upset with me for going out... he’d crawl onto the bed and start biting the blanket. The first time he did it I thought he was stuck or something, but then I tried to pull the blanket away, and he grumble meowed. He would do it anytime I had to go out of town (The longest I was ever away was three nights) and usually when I’d come home from work. It turned out to be like a game of tug of war for him.

Before I knew it, a whole year had gone by with this little miracle. I was falling more and more in love with him as time went on, all the while painfully aware that every moment with him was a gift. He started to get a bit more grumbly, and eventually started developing mouth ulcers, apparently something common in cats with stomach cancer. During a check up the vet said it might be time to let him go, but he was still super active. Still eating and drinking a ton, still purred when getting love, and still played actively with his crinkle ball. We decided to treat the ulcers as best we could, and upped his CBD dose. The vet said that if the ulcers didn’t shrink with this treatment, that it might be time to let him go. I knew his lust for life, but alo didn’t want him to suffer. I remember getting him home, and telling him that I would fight for his life as long as he did. I know that cats can’t understand our language, but I feel like some of them are really excellent at picking up intent. He would always look me square in the eye, with whatever vision he had left, and seemed to be intently listening. He would talk back often too, it was pretty incredible.

That week he upped his active factor... Played more than usual, wanted to go outside more, cuddled a ton, and was just an overall super happy to be alive cat. I sent the vet videos of him from that week, and she couldn’t believe it. She agreed that this was a cat who still had living to do, so ulcer meds got added to the pain med list, and he kept on going.

I started working from home, and that really pleased Tinker, though he became even more bonded to me than I thought possible. It got to the point where I'd open the bathroom door, and there he’d be, sitting like a patient dog, waiting to crawl back into my lap. He took his meds like a champ, and just like that, we were passing the two year mark of bringing him home.

Things with him were mostly great, but he was starting to slow down little by little.

He started to pee on the floor once in awhile, around the litter box, rather than in it. He prefered to do his business outside, but if someone wasn’t around to take him out, he would let his displeasure be known this way. He started coming and asking for his pain meds at the exact time he was supposed to get them, if not a little earlier. He was getting slower and slower, and I knew that the time was near. I started to build up this steel wall of protection around my heart, because everytime I thought of life without him, I’d feel this overwhelming sense of loss, and couldn’t stop from crying uncontrollably. We took things a day at a time, and things were mostly normal, other than him getting a little slower. A couple of days after my birthday he was playing with his crinkle ball. The next day he didn’t eat much, but still drank a ton and went outside. The next day he didn’t eat anything, but still drank and went outside, albeit slowly. Three days after playing with his crinkle ball he had trouble standing. I looked him in the eyes and could see that my little miracle, the grumpy old man of my life, the cat love of my life, was done. I called the vet, and found out that our favourite Doctor was just getting home from Japan that night. The receptionist booked him in to be put to sleep the next day and I hoped, selfishly, that our she could make it in.

I was with him 24/7 that final week, and spent the last 48 hours on the floor with him. The morning of his appointment i brought him onto my chest, one final time onto the bed. He fell fast asleep, and I got to just feel his warmth and breath for about 4 hours. Finally, but way too soon, it was time. My friend picked me up, and we drove him out, as we had for multiple check ups, him wrapped in a towel on my lap. The wall of protection around my heart was suffering terrible fissures, but I knew that I had to be strong for him. I did my best not to cry or allow my energy to get upset, so as not to upset him. Thankfully Dr.Gold, our favourite vet, was able to make it in. She set aside a room fo us for an hour, dimmed the lights, and had a beautiful hand knit blanket for him. Remembering what he was like that last time he got poked with a needle, I asked them if I could go in the back with him to have the IV put in, and they were kind enough to just do it all right in the room. He didn’t even squawk when they administered it, which just solidified for us how done he was. We were offered more time with him, but I knew he was done, and every moment with him now was a selfish one. He closed his eyes for pets, then looked at me one final time, as the rainbow bridge opened in front of him.

Afterwards I felt strangely numb, but also calm. I did what I had set out to do, two years previous, and was given so much more than I ever could have hoped for. As I’m typing this I’m crying, and have had to take multiple breaks. Knowing that such a special relationship is over, in these forms, has been harder than I’d care to admit. Being prepared to lose him from the get go hasn’t made grieving any easier. Greif is such a funny thing, that comes for you when you’re least expecting it. I’m bursting into tears much more than I’m comfortable with, but I know things will get easier with time. I’ll never stop missing him, but will always be forever grateful for every single bonus day we had together.

Rufus is doing ok now, though he is grieving too. His tail had a droop to it, and was yeowling the nights away... So I did what I did the last time he lost a sibling... He now has a new PF brother, Clue. I may not have much money, or energy, but I saw first hand the difference love and affection can have on a life. Clue is an all black fluffy guy, just like Smigeon was, and has asthma. He’s drooly and sweet, and him and Rufus have already started sleeping on the couch together. There is no way that Tinker could ever be replaced. That’s a hole in my soul that I don’t think will ever fully heal...but knowing that I’m making a difference in another life helps.

There are so many animals in need of loving homes, and not enough homes to house them. If you can, please consider adopting from our local shelter or animal rescue. I get the impulse for wanting a certain breed, but going to a breeder or a pet store is unnecessary. Just as many pure breeds cycle through rescues as not, so if you’re patient you can become the furrever home to the pet of your dreams, for a fraction of the price, and every fee paid to a rescue ensures that they can continue to help more animals.

My time with Tinker taught me to really appreciate life, and see things to be thankful for with crystal like clarity. He’s taught me compassion and patience on a new level, and gave me a lifetime's worth of cat love memories.

Think of all that your next rescue could teach you, and start looking. Nothing would make me happier than if this story can inspire you to open your heart, and home. It can be hard, it can be painful, but I promise you, it’s worth it.

Please consider donating to Katie’s Place if you have the means. Or your own local animal rescue.

http://katiesplaceshelter.com/

Thank you.

Love always,

Elizabeth xoxo