#everything was bigger & I remember there was I think parties? & AU versions of my family some supernatural | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

byeoltoyuki · 6 years ago

Text

Only you ⇾ knj

⇨ Since I’ve lost everything I’m reposting…

↳Pairing : You x Namjoon

Genre : Fluff / Gang au

Words: +11k

Warnings: Some violence

Summary : In which you and Namjoon are kind of a gangster version of Romeo and Juliet.

August 2019.

It was barely seven in the morning when the first ray of sunshine brushed your face, gently at first, and more intensely later as you refused to move and close the window blinds so you could sleep longer. For once, you had no work waiting for you, no appointment, no lying clients, no judges to convince of someone's innocence, nobody screaming at you or whatsoever. And yet, you cracked one eye open when you realized something was missing.

Or more exactly someone.

Your face still pressed on your pillow, you patted the spot beside you but it was empty just like you expected it to be. You groaned at first, now fully awake, you turned in the bed to face the spot that Namjoon had previously occupied. But his spot was not completely empty which made you actually smile. There was a plate with food, fresh fruits, a glass of orange juice and a still hot coffee seeing how some steam escaped from the mug. So you didn't leave me like that huh. Something else grabbed your attention; a photo polaroid stood against the glass of your juice and a crumbled piece of paper just beside it.

You stretched fully in your bed, arms above your head, yawning, before finally changing your position in the bed. You grabbed the polaroid and could not help but chuckle. It was a picture of you, sleeping like a baby. You took the note that came along with it.

"You look terribly adorable when you sleep, you know that?

Now we're even.

I have an early meeting. Have a good day!

See you later"

You smiled fondly at his note. It was always like this. Whenever Namjoon had to leave before you wake up, he would leave something behind just to make things easier for both of you. And whenever you had to leave, you would leave different kind of photos behind -whenever it was picture of him sleeping, or you. It was your thing and if at first Namjoon found it odd he came to absolutely adore it.

You slid from the bed and grabbed the first piece of clothes that you could reach which happened to be Namjoon's white shirt that last night you almost ripped from him. You grabbed the mug of coffee and left his room -trying not to stumble with all the clothes on the floor. You chuckled at the sight and took a sip of your coffee. Bitter just like you loved it.

It had been months since the last time you felt so relaxed, so fresh, so rested, your heart light and ready for whatever life was about to throw your way.

Just like many times before, the view from Namjoon's flat always took your breath away, especially when you managed to get up on time to see the sun rise. You admired the rays slowly recovering the whole city, reflecting on some buildings, shining brightly. You drank your coffee in silence, captivated and enjoying the peaceful atmosphere.

Everything seemed to be so perfect. And in a way it was. If you ignored the fact that you were not supposed to be together.

The first time you had set your eyes on Namjoon, you were both in high school. Young, fresh, quite naive, unaware of the rivalry between your fathers, and rather stupid whenever it came to life, on other aspect -such as studies, you were both on the top. However, instead of hating each other like your surroundings expected, you became close. You never truly understood why people had to fight, violence was never your cup of tea -even today you would still rather use your words and brain instead of weapons. Namjoon seemed to be thinking the same thing and for this reason you just clicked.

While your fathers fought, you enjoyed your youth, studying, partying, meeting people and that was how by miracle both you and Namjoon stayed friend through the whole high school and even college. Of course there were times when you had to pretend to hate each other for the sake of both your families -it was annoying but you were selfless and despite your fondness for each other, your families stayed a priority. Until sadly the end of the college, after graduation you both had to part and go your way. You knew it would happen but maybe you hoped for a miracle.

And it happened.

One year ago.

June 2018

It had been four years since you graduated from college. Fours years since you had last seen Namjoon -you could not say heard because you sure as hell had heard a lot about him, his brain and his strategy to conquer new territories. And he had been driving your father mad ever since he ascended in ranks. It was nice knowing that he was still alive and was doing well for himself but you could not help but be bitter about how you parted, forgetting all about your years of friendship. And because of what exactly?

A stupid rivalry between two families. Two businesses. Two gangs.

Namjoon's family, the Kim's had ruled the North of Seoul for now more than ten years while your father had all the South under control. Both of them, instead of being partners had nothing more to do than fight. It was childish and so many suffered but nobody seemed ready to put a stop to it.

Until that night at Taehyung's party.

Taehyung was another of your close friend from college -probably the only one you actually kept from college and probably because he was part of the same world as you. He swore allegiance to no one except himself which was considered arrogant and full of himself but Taehyung knew his worth. He was the best hitman in Seoul, if not in whole Korea and only a foolish man would try to go against him.

But to you, he was just Kim Taehyung, the cute boy that had a rather weird sense of humor but that you happened to like anyway -you would still roll your eyes at his jokes before laughing. Whenever he was back in town, he would always host a party, more like parties, smaller one reserved to his closest friend and bigger one for the rest.

"Glad you came, Y/N." Taehyung hugged you tightly, lifting you a little from the ground just to show you how happy he was.

"As if I could miss it." You laughed, letting him do whatever he wanted -you got used to his touchy side with years. "But hey, can you drop me back on the floor? I can barely breath."

"Oops. Sorry." He smiled sheepishly at you, looking childish and absolutely adorable. No wonder people got easily deceived by his looks. One moment he could kill you in cold blood and the other he was five again.

"Namjoon is here." Taehyung suddenly said, his face turning back to serious -what a whiplash again.

"Is he now?" You quirked your brow

"I just - I don't know how you guys feel about each other so I'd rather warn you about his presence."

You believed Taehyung was scared of what could happen if both you and Namjoon meet suddenly. He knew about your past but things had changed and he wanted to make sure you would not start a fight. Not like you were the kind to pick a fight.

"You worry too much." You nudged him playfully with your hips before giving him a reassuring smile. "I'm not my father, Tae. And I believe Namjoon is reasonable too."

"He changed."

"We'll be fine."

When in fact you had no idea. Taehyung was right, Namjoon had probably changed, whenever it was because years had passed or because his life style eventually changed him.

But you still hoped.

"I'm going to grab a drink." You hugged him one last time, "I'm happy to see you back in town. Don't leave again for so long, ok?" You quickly added before going to the improvised bar in the middle of the room.

Taehyung's apartment was slowly getting crowded -not like you minded, you had managed to grab a beer at the bar before it got full of people that you were not really ready to talk to. Among the dozens of faces you managed to recognize some; Jimin and Hoseok were of course at the party, you did not remember them missing any of Taehyung's party. They waved at you, smiling and you raised your beer in return before someone else grabbed your attention. Someone you had not seen in ages.

Kim Namjoon looked just as handsome as in your memory or maybe he looked even better. His face had matured. He had dyed his hair into ashy blond that suited him a little too well for your liking. His dimples were just as visible as he laughed along with another guy. He wore some black jeans with a white shirt -the first three buttons undone giving you a rather delicious sight of what was hidden behind the shirt. You had to take a sip of your beer to get rid of some unwelcome thoughts.

But all the staring did not go unnoticed. Despite the interesting talk with one of his business partner to be, Namjoon felt a burning gaze on him. For a moment -while pretending to listen, he tore his eyes from the man before him, looking around to find the culprit. And he did find you easily since you refused to let go. Suddenly, whatever the guy beside him said fell on deaf ears. His eyes saw you and only you. The loud chattering turned into a mere buzz in the background.

Namjoon recognized you instantly. You were different. You felt different. And yet, at the same time you were just the same as four years ago. The friend he had to part away despite the strong bond, despite the fondness and the love.

You stared at each other, almost forgetting how to breath. But then, Namjoon spanned of his trance, he excused himself from his 'friend' and without breaking the eye contact with you, he approached you.

"Y/N?"

"Hi there." You never thought Namjoon would make you nervous one day but he did. Your voice was suddenly too low, too weak for your liking and you were sure it did not go unnoticed by Namjoon too.

"I can't believe it's you." He smiled so brightly causing your heart to miss a beat.

Was he always so attractive? You cursed your own weakness and tried your best to contain your nervousness. You're not a teenager anymore Y/N! Get a damn grip on yourself.

"I mean. I was aware that you and Taehyung were still friends. He talks about you from time to time." Namjoon admitted. "Can I sit with you?"

"Since when do you need a permission?" You joked and patted the empty place beside you. "I'm surprised he tells you things about me. Should I worry?"

Namjoon actually laughed at that. Knowing Taehyung, you had all the reasons in the world to wonder what kind of stories he shared with him. "Don't worry. He just mentioned seeing you, probably to piss me off a little."

You frowned upon his admission. "Why would you get annoyed?"

"Because he kept bragging about how it was fun partying with you. I guess I got kind of jealous of him. I missed you. A lot."

You were completely taken off guard. The Namjoon you remembered was never that straightforward, he was quite the opposite and a little shy about his feelings. The blush rose to your cheeks as his words completely hit you. Despite your sudden awkwardness, you gathered the courage to raise your face and look at him straight into the eyes.

"I missed you too." You admitted it out loud.

"Good." He bumped his glass of whiskey against your beer and wore a proud smile on his face.

"You know. My dad gets annoyed quite often because of you." Namjoon said

"How come? I've met your dad only twice." You were genuinely surprised.

"Yes but you had ruined many of his plans. I guess law degree can be useful in our business after all."

"And you're the one talking! Heard your strategies are unbeatable."

He scrunched his nose and took another sip of whiskey. "I try."

"I know what you did." You looked at him as you said that. "Your father is reckless and don't show mercy. You, however, all your strategies meant to succeed without casualties. I applaud you for that."

Namjoon chuckled, defeated. "You know me too well."

"What did you become, Joonie?" You asked, your mind was now more at ease as you got more comfortable with him. You even leaned closer, your arm brushed his and you looked at him fondly. "Except working for your dad."

"Actually, I'm going to take his position very soon." This time, it was Namjoon's voice that got a little low and a tiny bit threatening.

"You don't seem very pleased."

"I don't know. I knew it would happen but I'm not sure this is the life I want for myself."

You knew how he felt, you understood his reasons because it echoed your own. You wrapped your arm around his and rested your head against his shoulder. "I know how you feel. I wished we had a choice."

Namjoon sighed and emptied his glass in one go. "Sucks to be us." And then he quickly added. "So. Let's say we play it risky. Let's say we want to keep our friendship despite our families."

"Can we?" You cut him before he could finish. "Because I honestly don't want us to part again."

Namjoon inhaled before his face broke into a huge smile. "Then you have no objection for a lunch together tomorrow?"

It was a bad idea. A terrible, horrific idea.

You still said yes.

****

To say that you dreaded the lunch with Namjoon would be the understatement of the century. On one hand you had absolutely no reason to fear, you knew Namjoon and he was still the same guy you had befriended years ago. On the other hand, you could not ignore your father's harsh words about Namjoon's family. It was ridiculous how they hated each other when instead they should have been partners.

But the lunch with Namjoon turned out to be beyond perfect. Before him you had met many other interesting men but Namjoon was something else. He was everything you had ever wished in a man. He had a great sense of humor, cute with his dimples -and you kind of wanted to poke them every time he smiled. Namjoon was clever, you have known it for years but it felt different now. He could talk about so many different things without sounding boring and he was, of course, a source of knowledge that you particularly liked.

Out of all the places Namjoon could have brought you for a kind of lunch date, he chose to go back to where everything started: the small restaurant that you used to go when you were still students. The restaurant had a small terrace that was in a rather cute garden. You were surprised to see that this place still existed and looked even better than in your memories.

"I have to admit, you chose well." You commented as you sat down in front of him

"I felt like it would be nice to meet in a familiar environment. Do you remember how much time we spent there?" Namjoon grinned widely

"I remember spending all my allowance, yeah." You chuckled at the memory. "Dad would always refuse to give me more money so you ended up paying for me half of the time."

"I did, didn't I?"

"You were a bad influence! Not only did I spend all my money on this restaurant, but I spent just as much for your damn parties!"

"Hey!" Namjoon protested. "You loved those parties! Whenever it was at our places or in clubs, you would never miss it. You were such a wild little girl."

You actually shrugged at the way he said 'little girl' but you pretended his words did not affect you, instead, you rolled your eyes at him. "And you were a nerd by day and a fuckboy by night! No wonder you got along with Tae so much."

"Should I remind you that he's your friend too?"

"And I adore him. But it doesn't mean I won't state the obvious!"

Namjoon laughed, defeated and probably because he felt the same way.

"But not as much as I adored you." You whispered the last part

*****

⎪Joonie

[5:30pm]

You're having a meeting with Park Jihoon, don't you?

⎪You

[5:32pm]

Ok. Do I want to know how you know that ??

⎪Joonie

[5:33pm]

This asshole wants to rise within our family and he thinks that if he has your dad's head it will help.

⎪You

[5:34pm]

Are you kidding me

⎪Joonie

[5:35pm]

Which is ridiculous if you want my opinion. My dad kinda has fun provoking yours

⎪You

[5:36pm]

I noticed. Mine seems to like it too. Are they teenagers srsly.

⎪Joonie

[5:37pm]

I know right ?? Anyway. Back to the track. You need to cancel their meeting.

⎪You

[5:38pm]

How ??? I can't just go and tell my dad 'hey dad? Namjoon , you know your nemesis's son told me that Jihoon wants your head'.

⎪Joonie

[5:39pm]

Distract him?

⎪You

[5:40pm]

HOW. He never listens to me either!

⎪Joonie

[5:41pm]

Idk?

You were highly irritated and desperate. It was really nice of Namjoon to warn you beforehand but you had absolutely no idea how to distract your father from his business which sometimes seemed more important than you You curled your fists on your laps and thought hard. There was two hours left. Less than two hours to find a solution.

The solution came to you twenty minutes later by the name of Kim Seokjin, your stupidly handsome fiance.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:01pm]

Hey, I was about to ask a girl out, you won't kind, will ya?

⎪You

[6:02pm]

In a matter of fact, I do.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:05pm]

Now that's new? I thought we agreed of not falling in love with each other?

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:06pm]

I can't blame you though. I wouldn't have been able to resist my charms either.

⎪You

[6:08pm]

For fuck's sake.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:09pm]

No really. I mean, have you seen that face?

⎪You

[6:10pm]

I'm going to punch you to the moon and we'll see if you're still so 'handsome'.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:15pm]

Festy. Maybe I should forget about that girl after all.

You face palmed in despair, your head was throbbing. Another time you would have laughed and played along, you usually did but tonight you had better to do.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:18pm]

What's wrong?

Finally.

⎪You

[6:20pm]

Ok. So my dad and I are supposed to meet with Park Jihoon.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:22pm]

He's a total douchebag tho.

⎪You

[6:24pm]

I'm aware, thanks. And let's say I heard that he was planning to ambush us.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:26pm]

Now that won't surprise me.

⎪You

[6:28pm]

I need to convince my dad to cancel this stupid meeting. And I can't tell him how i know it.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:29pm]

And can I know ?

⎪You

[6:30pm]

No.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:31pm]

Fine. So what exactly do you want me to do?

⎪You

[6:33pm]

My dad values the relationship with your family. Can't you do something about it?

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:34pm]

Eh….

⎪You

[6:35pm]

Please…

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:37pm]

Fine. Can't let my future wife to die, can I now?

⎪You

[6:40pm]

Love you.

⎪Jinnie-boo

[6:50pm]

You better.

Except you did not expect Jin inviting both you and your father to fly to their private island. You actually had no idea -and by how your father reacted you believed he had no clue either, that they owned one. He was surprised by the invitation, especially such a sudden invitation but then Jin stepped in. "It's my fault. I was supposed to tell you earlier but I was gotten carried away. I'm sorry." He sounded so ridiculously genuine that your father believed and forgave him immediately and decided that visiting the so mysterious island was far more interesting than whatever Park Jihoon had to tell them.

How damn true.

*****

Maybe you should have thought twice before accepting to go to a rather shady club with your friends. Especially when those called friends did not hesitate to ditch you for guys. Well, not like you were surprised, after all going to a club was mainly about hooking up, except for you -you actually enjoyed drinking rather than hooking up. So maybe leaving by yourself was not your wisest choice either.

It was a rather fresh night. You pulled at your red leather jacket, trying to cover your neck as much as you could but the wind still managed to get through. But the wind and the cold ended up being the least of your problems.

You had walked for only twenty minutes when you first heard steps behind you. In other times, it would have not worried you. Except it was past midnight and the streets were empty. Instead of walking faster, you slowed down, listening to the steps, only to realize that it was not one man that was following you but at least five. By now, you had no doubt that those were not some creeps but rather enemies that knew who you were.

You halted in your track and with a long and tired sigh you faced them. "Hi guys. May I help you?"

It took them off guard -none of them expected you to face them. But you did. They glanced at each other and you took their moment of distraction to pull your gun out of your back, pointing at one of them. You could not win against all of them but at least you could disturb them and maybe find a way to get away.

"Do you really think you can win against us?" One of the man asked, his gun pointed at you

"Probably not. But at least I can kill one or two of you." You shrugged. "So. What do you guys actually want?" Your statement shut them completely up. Maybe some were confused with your recklessness, maybe some thought you were crazy or maybe some just did not know how to deal with you.

"Correct me if I'm wrong. But they were ordered to capture you and bring you to our headquarters." You almost yelped in surprise by how close, deep and extremely dangerous the voice sounded from behind you. Your whole body froze but your heart kept beating frantically in your chest as it recognized Namjoon's voice.

What were you supposed to do?

Your breath hitched in your throat as your thoughts were running wild in your head. Namjoon's presence should have been comforting but it was not. Yes, he was your friend but this situation was too delicate, too problematic. He could not possibly save you without alerting his father about his friendship -if not betrayal. There was no way out of it.

"Boss." The same guy that had his gun pointed at you said.

"Where's your van?" Namjoon spoke before they could ask him anything about his sudden appearance

You had to admit that you were impressed with Namjoon; without even seeing him, you imagined easily how he looked; stern, annoyed and his voice sent chills down your spine.

So we can't stay friends after all.

"One block from here." The second man answered and pointed the right direction.

"Good." Namjoon's voice sounded even closer than before. The next thing you knew, he had his hand wrapped tightly around your throat, your back pressed against his toned chest. In any other circumstances you would have enjoyed it. But not this time. Especially not when his grip tightened; you grabbed his hand, trying to make him stop.

But he did not.

He hovered over you, his warm breath tickling your ear. But what happened next was beyond your comprehension.

"I'll take down the two on the left. Go for the one in the middle." Namjoon whispered, his free hand slid slowly down your back.

You wanted so badly to turn around and ask him what the hell he was doing but he never let you the chance. Not when his grip around your throat suddenly got lighter. He was about to give you the signal and despite being disoriented and a tiny bit scared, you were more than ready to shoot some of those idiots.

"Now!" Namjoon ordered and you shoot without having a second thoughts. And so did Namjoon.

They did not see it coming. Before they could even think about pulling the trigger, they were almost all dead, except one last man standing behind the corpses, looking absolutely lost and terrified. You almost felt bad for the lonely man, all of his 'friends' were dead and you doubted he would live past tonight.

"Wha-why?" He stuttered, eyes wide, voice shaky, he took a step back while Namjoon walked past you, one hand tucked inside his pocket while the other one still held the gun.

"Nothing personal."

"Please. Don't kill me." He begged, dropping on his knees, begging for mercy.

"I'm sorry. I can't." And with that he shoot the man.

For a moment you both stayed silent. Namjoon probably thinking about his next moves while you tried to fully grab hold of what happened before your eyes. Namjoon had killed his own men in order to save you, to preserve both of your reputation. It was a mess and nothing good could come out.

"Namjoon." You finally dared to call for him, making him turn around to look at you. You felt bad for what he had to do but to your biggest surprise Namjoon did not look guilty or remorseful for that matter. "Why?"

"Why?" Namjoon repeated before ruffling his hair and laughing -a laugh that sent another wave of shivers down your spine. "Do you really need to ask?"

"Those were your men." You knew you were not supposed to feel bad about them, after all it was you or them but killing was not something you enjoyed and so far you managed to avoid blood on your hands. But a little bird told you it was about to change.

"And you're important to me."

Your heart melted at his confession and it took you all effort in the world to resist the urge to run straight into his arms. Kim Namjoon was a dangerous man. Not because he was the future leader of a very notorious gang but because he was slowly winning your heart.

"But-"

"I don't want to talk about it, Y/N. Let me bring you home before I have to kill someone else to keep you safe."

In another situation maybe you would have protest but right at that moment you only wanted to get in the safety of your home, far from this mess. You only nodded your head and followed him in silence till his car.

"What about their van?" You remembered and glanced back

"I'll deal with it later."

By 'later' he meant calling for the them -you saw him typing the special number, the organization that even you were scared off because they knew to wipe any trace of someone's existence in exchange for money.

Truly, you have underestimated Namjoon and his implication in the underground business.

*****

You have not seen or heard about Namjoon for an entire week after the incident. Maybe he was avoiding you, maybe you were -you definitely were. The incident had changed many things for you and you could only guess that Namjoon felt the same way.

You were both careless and naive to believe that your friendship could last, that you could even have something more, something deeper. But after that night you had to do a reality check. Kim Namjoon could not be you friend. Not now, not ever.

It saddened you, you could not deny the growing feelings, the butterflies in your stomach whenever he smiled at you or how you shivered to his every touch.

"Y/N, are you even listening?" Your colleague, John called for you, his brows furrowed in annoyance. "You've been spacing out for the past ten minutes."

"I- Sorry."

"Listen, I don't care that you're having trouble in paradise but I need you to concentrate on this trial! Your father pays rather well and I don't want to fail because of you."

You rolled your eyes at him, beyond upset at his lack of sympathy, the only thing that mattered to him was money and his reputation of course. You flicked his forehead and clicked your tongue in annoyance. "Stop being a douche. You'll win this stupid trial whenever I'm here or not. You prepared the defense by yourself."

You took the folder from his hands and walked away without looking back. Your mind was somewhere else -no, you wanted to be somewhere else. But sometimes you had to do things that were needed to do and not what you wanted to.

On your way to the trial, you checked the additional information that John had gathered on your father's behalf, information that made you frown even more when you realized your client had messed with the Kim's. Once again it was a war between your two families. John noticed it too from what he had written down. However, you were impressed by how organized he was. He had imagined so many different scenarios, ready to defend your client at all the cost, ready to even blame the victim itself. You cringed and closed the folder, your hand lingered on the cover. One day you would stop caring, but for now you felt like selling your soul to the devil all over again.

Your phone buzzed in your pocket and you considered ignoring it -after all the trial was about to start but then it kept buzzing. One message after another. It was suspicious and almost annoying.

⎪Tae

[10:05am]

Hey babe.

⎪Tae

[10:06am]

I usually don't go against my own rule but I kinda like you so…

⎪Tae

[10:07am]

Maybe you can consider leaving the trial?

You frowned at his words. How was Taehyung aware of the trial? And why would he care?

⎪You

[10:09am]

Why?

⎪Tae

[10:12am]

Pumpkin, have you already forgotten what I do for a living?

⎪You

[10:15am]

No, i didn't. But what does it have to do - You were hired to kill someone in there?!

⎪Tae

[10:15am]

Yeah.

⎪You

[10:16am]

Who?

⎪Tae

[10:19am]

Your client and the lawyers.

You needed no more to guess the lawyers were you and John and you were in deep trouble.

⎪You

[10:21am]

When?

⎪Tae

[10:23am]

20min

⎪You

[10:24am]

Are you fucking kidding me?!

⎪Tae

[10:25am]

Get out. Now.

You should have been grateful for his warning, Taehyung had just proved you how much he valued your friendship by breaking his own rules. But could you really leave? John, despite being an ass was highly appreciated by your father and you could not deny that he was skillful in his field. And then there was your client, your father's business partner and a friend of his. You hated him. He was trash who treated women like toys and he messed with wrong people. Just like this damn case. He just couldn't keep his dick inside his pants, could he? Now the Kims want his head.

Your phone buzzed one more time, you glanced at the ID, Taehyung, and the preview of the message was enough. "Get out."

But you did not. You put your phone back in your bag, you pressed the folder tighter against your chest -hoping deep inside that nothing bad would occur.

It did in the form of Kim Taehyung.

You crossed the empty hall but before you could join the right floor, someone grabbed your wrist tightly, yanking you inside a dark room while another hand clasped against your mouth preventing you from screaming. You fought back, trying to nudge the assailant but his grip only tightened leaving you with no choice but to hire hard his hand on your mouth.

"Bloody fucking hell, YN! It hurts!" Taehyung helped but despite the pain he did not let go of your wrist.

You stopped abruptly fighting, your body relaxing instantly but not for long. You kicked him right in the shin -just because he had scared you, and turned around to look angrily at him.

"What do you think you're doing?!"

"Making sure my friend doesn't get killed in the crossfire."

"Tae-"

"No. Listen. I usually don't give a damn about my targets, you know that. But you're my friend." Taehyung cut you, his voice deep and sharp and somehow threatening -he would not accept any defiance

"I can't." You sincerely answered

"This man is a piece of shit.'

"And I know it. But you're not a saint either. I'm horrible too. He's my dad friend. And then there's John. He's good at his work, can't let him die either." You tried to explain but Taehyung did not really listen; he checked his watch before clicking his tongue in annoyance

"Listen. I really don't care about that."

"For fuck's sake!"

"Namjoon warned me you would be the second lawyer." Taehyung admitted in hope it would make you react. "So please, do us a favor."

"What will you do if I say no?"

"You won't like it."

You felt torn between your duty, your feelings and what you actually wanted to do. You were touched that Namjoon, despite the situation you were both in, tried to protect you. Your heart swelled with pride and pure fondness.

"Make it work." Taehyung handed you a piece of paper with an address. "You know what to do."

And Taehyung left alone, without a word, leaving to your thoughts and to take the right decision -maybe he already knew the result. You clenched your fingers around the paper, closing your eyes for a moment, considering your options.

Make it work. Taehyung's words echoed in your mind, on repeat. It should not surprise you that he would push you into something he knew would be absolutely unreasonable, dangerous but yet it was just so tempting, alluring. And for once in your life you decided to follow your desires and not what people expected from you.

You came out of the empty room. There was probably five minutes left before chaos erupt in this place and you wanted to be gone by then. You threw the folder you have been carrying around in the closest bin and you left. Without thinking about the consequences. Without looking back. Without caring.

*****

Despite your initial courage and will to see Namjoon, you faltered once you found yourself at his doorstep, paralyzed, anxious and your heart pounding hard against your chest. It was ridiculous to feel suddenly so shy, nervous and a little bit overwhelmed, especially after everything he had done for you. You knew how you felt about him, you could not lie to yourself and pretend those feelings did not exist, because they did and they were more than strong. But could you really face him?

If you were not so lost in your own world, you would have noticed an amused Namjoon standing just few steps from you, watching you struggling with what to do. He rushed back home as soon as he got the message from Taehyung. A simple ‘she’s on her way’ that drove him absolutely mad. He was relieved that she obeyed for once –but he had no doubt Taehyung had a hard time convincing her.

With a fond smile on his face he approached you, expecting you to hear his steps. You did not. He leaned closer and stopped just when his mouth was above your ear and then you felt it: a warm breath and a presence all too familiar.

“Why are you hesitating, sweet thing?” He whispered, his arm circled around your waist to steady you as his voice made you jump out of your skin. He chuckled and turned you around in his arms. "Hi."

"Hi." You muttered, swearing at how weak your voice sounded but you blamed Namjoon for having such a strong effect on you.

Quickly you took a step back, putting some space between your bodies just so you could gather your thoughts. Namjoon smiled knowingly, his eyes shining brightly -he was making fun of your awkwardness that was so out of character.

"Why are you so tensed? It's just me."

"Yeah but the you today betrayed his family for me. Again." You snapped back too fast -sometimes you should watch your mouth , too harshly but you had no other choice but take responsibility for your words.

Namjoon's face darkened, his lips turned into a thin line before he walked past you and entered the code to his flat. "Come in. Let's talk."

It had been months since you started hanging up in secrete together and yet it was your first time at his place. It was huge -just like you expected it to be. He lived in a penthouse with a ridiculously huge windows and with a perfect view of the city. It had some eerie yet chic vibes. Most of the furniture were either white or grey with the exception of some wooden table and shelves that contained some of his -weird- figurines collection. It was a nice place and you could only imagine how bright and beautiful the view was every morning when the sun was slowly rising. It was not hard for you to imagine the scene, you admiring the city with a hot cup of coffee, wearing Namjoon's shirt, the first ray of sunshines brushing your face. Definitely something you wished could happen.

"Nice place." You commented, your eyes still wandering all around the place before falling on his face. You should have not looked at him. It was a very, very bad idea. He had a scowl on his face and yet his eyes were darker, deeper; he looked intimidating and it made you weak, your knees ready to give in.

"What are we going to do?" You decided to initiate the talk since he seemed too busy staring, analyzing you. "Stop staring."

"Does it bother you?"`

"What? The staring or the mess we're in?"

"From where I'm sitting the situation isn't that bad."

"Are you kidding me? Namjoon, you killed for me." You could not believe how easily he brushed the subject, so indifferent and cold when you both knew it was wrong.

"Don't give me that look." Namjoon took a step forward, his hands tucked in his pockets, he looked just too good, too distracting and you could not stop your brain from wandering in a place it should not -especially when you were supposed to have a serious talk.

"What look?" You took two steps back, unconsciously you bit your lips.

"That look." And his eyes fell on your lips that had been tempting him for months now. He took another step toward you and then another, un your hips hit the back of the coach, trapping you between him and the couch.

"Namjoon." You protested and put your hand on his chest. Trying to push him away seemed to be the right thing to do but despite the strength you put in, he did not budge. He leaned, instead, closer, too close for your sanity. "Can we talk?"

And then he smirked and pulled away. "That's the plan. What did you think I was about to do?"

This little shit.

"I don't know. Bang me on this couch?" You ran your lousy mouth before you could even think to a proper answer. By the time the words had left your mouth, you knew there was no going back.

But to your huge surprise, Namjoon burst into a loud laughter, applauding your honesty -or stupidity. You punched his arm playfully to make him stop laughing before slumping into the couch.

"Fine. Fine." He raised his hands in defense and sat on the chair in front of you. "Now. Where were we?"

You almost snapped back a 'about banging' but you bit on your tongue just on time. "What are we doing, Joonie?"

"The real question should be, what do we want to do?"

"You know it doesn't work like that."

"And so?"

You had to admit that Namjoon did not cease to amaze you. He was a clever man, maybe even too clever, so how come he was not thinking with his brain and instead let his feelings, his heart rule him over?

"Our families are enemies."

"I'm aware of that. But, we're not our parents."

"Namjoon."

"Y/N."

Why are you so damn irritating?! And unreasonable! Was what you wanted to scream at him, instead you crossed your arms against your chest and arched a brow at him.

"I'm doing it my way. I want you. I want to be with you and I sincerely don't care of what others can think."

"Outrageous. Really." You commented sounding indifferent when in fact your body temperature suddenly got higher at his confession.

"They don't need to know, Y/N. But I really don't want us to part again."

"It's a terrible idea."

"From time to time, I don't mind being unreasonable."

"I guess I can only say yes since I have always been the unreasonable one."

One year later and you were still together.

August 2019.

This charity gala was probably the biggest joke ever and you could not believe you accepted coming. Yes, the gala gathered the wealthiest people from Seoul, they needed their money to help orphans. And from outside you knew it was a noble cause. Just not tonight. Not when half of the people were corrupted. It had gathered the worst human beings and you knew that both your family and Namjoon's were part of it. Who in the world thought it was alright to invite bosses of two gang that were so deeply involved with guns traffic, prostitution and many other domain that were highly inappropriate? You wanted to have a nice talk with this person, just to set their mind straight. But a little bird told you that people behind it were not all good as well.

Knowing all too well the risks, you came prepared for many situations; agents positioned at different strategic spot of the room, ready to fight back if needed but you were convinced the Kim's had prepared just as much.

But tonight you decided not to care. To hell the corrupted. To hell this whole family business. You came here to enjoy the show, spend some quality time with friends -you were more than delighted to know that Taehyung would not miss the party and it of course showed again how this gala made no sense.

And you had a date. Not a real one since you were highly committed to Namjoon but who said you could not spice up things and irritate your man a little bit by making him jealous?

You arrived at the gala, your arm linked with Jin's, just like a real gentleman he lead the way to the main room where was all the fun.

"Why did you ask me to be your date again?" Jin leaned a little closer to whisper his question ad you walked through the door.

"Why not?" But lying to Jin was a bad idea, especially because he knew you oh too well. And he knew exactly when you had something on mind. Something that would lead to a future disaster.

"Y/N. Should I be worried?"

"I don't think so." You squeezed his arm and winked. "If it can make you feel better, I'm the one risking something there. Not you."

He frowned at you, a tiny bit unconvinced but he let it slid anyway. He always did. You kissed his cheek, forgetting for a moment that you were in the middle of a crowd that adored gossip. You heard almost instantly loud gasps and whispers.

"They're lovely." A woman whispered to her friend and you could not help but grin.

"You're not helping yourself." Jin commented and fastened his pace. In a blink of an eye you were in the main room, a glass of champaign in your hand while Jin observed your face, looking for answers that you did not want to give so easily.

"Spill it." He demanded

"Why would I have something to spill?" You feigned innocent till the end even if you knew exactly what he wanted to know.

Jin was, despite what people believed, a very clever and cunning man. He knew exactly how to deceive someone and they would not even notice it. He manipulated his own family at ease, for them only realize it when it was too late. It was amusing, really. You knew he would become a great, dangerous and famous leader one day. Your father knew all those qualities too and of course he wanted nothing more than to see the two of you married, forming this way an important alliance. Too bad Jin and you had better ideas.

"So?" Jin insisted but then he smirked when he spotted Namjoon and his father. "Oh it's going to be so interesting."

"Hm?" Jin grabbed gently your shoulder and made you turn around, pointing a finger a small group of people talking vividly. "Do you think they will behave?"

Jin was highly amused, his voice was laced with mischief and you knew he was up to no good. But you did not give in, after all Jin was not aware of your relationship with Namjoon either, so you shrugged as if it was not a big deal and not your business -and you have decided not to care for at least one night, instead you took another sip of your champaign and turned around to look at Jin.

"You're no fun." Jin complained, whined you would even add.

"I'm not a sadist like you are."

"Oh but I am not. I just enjoy a nice show." And he drank innocently his whiskey, he ignored the roll of you eyes but welcomed your light nudge in the stomach.

"Jin!" Your father's loud voice suddenly startled both of you. Faster than you could tell, your father was all into both of your personal space, patting eagerly Jin's back and smiley way too widely for you liking. "It's so nice to see you with Y/N. She seems to forget that she has a fiance and spend all her time working." And he gave you the stink-eye -that you took pleasure to ignore.

"Oh but she texts me all the time!" Jin defended you without hesitation, his words pouring out of his mouth so naturally. He placed his hand in the middle of your back, the game was on and he played it perfectly. "You'd be surprised by how cheesy she can get."

Oh how much you wanted to wipe the smirk from his face but you played along and leaned even further against him, smiling at him.

"Does she?" He looked at you, suspicious -not like you could blame him, but he ended up smiling to your surprise. "Just like your mother."

Fortunately for both of you, he did not keep you company any longer, having way too many people to greet, to plot.

"You know," Jin started "I do believe your father knows about our little game and he scares the shit out of me pretending he doesn't." He looked at you more seriously this time.

"Of course he knows. He knows I wasn't thrilled with the idea of marrying someone he chose for me. No matter how much I like you."

"Then who would you want to marry?"

You did not realize, at least not instantly, that your eyes fell on Namjoon. Jin arched a brow at you and quickly glanced behind him, the result surprised him.

"Kim Namjoon? Really?" This time, it was his turn to nudge you playfully, wiggling his brows suggestively at you as if he knew something he was not supposed to know. Which was probably true.

"I'm just surprised to see him here." You lied and tore your eyes from him. And what a hard thing to do. Namjoon looked terribly handsome in the black suit and with his shirt lightly unbuttoned. You just wanted to grab his hand and pull him away from the crowd, from those fake people and have fun. But of course, you could not do it without causing a ruckus -nobody was ready for that.

"Bullshit." Jin cut your trail of thoughts, his voice sounded too low and threatening for your liking. His eyes got darker too and you could not remember when was the last time you felt actually intimidated by this man. Jin would not tolerate any of your lies and you did not want to lose such a precious ally either.

"When did it start?" He asked

"One year ago." You admitted

"Holy shit." He gasped, having a 360 degrees change in his behavior. Jin was another weird fellow. "I expected you to say something like 'he's a quick fuck" but one year?!"

You nudged him right into the stomach as he was being too loud and was attracting unnecessary attention on both of you.

"Your dad will have a fit once he finds out." Jin grinned widely, the idea of your father losing his mind delighted him.

What a weirdo.

"But I have to admit that I didn't expect you to be dating Namjoon."

"We've been friends since high school." You shrugged, brushing it as if it was not a big deal.

"Oh so you decided to bring me just so you could spite him?"

You refused to answer but Jin already had his reply as you huffed loudly and looked the other way.

"Fine." Jin leaned closer, his warm breath tickling your exposed neck. "You're lucky I love provoking people and I'd love to see him reacting to our display of affection, honey." He let his fingers ran up and down your arm, slowly and softly, making you shiver. You leant against his shoulder and smiled as you took a sip of your champaign.

"Just so you know, I had to cancel a rather hot date just to come with you - which I don't regret." Jin circled your waist with his arm and turned you around so you would face him and at the same time have a clear view on Namjoon.

And oh the view was worth it.

You did not realize till now that Namjoon had, too, noticed you but his eyes were dark and screamed danger as he drank his whiskey without tearing his eyes of you. You shuddered in excitement and gleed, it was just too amusing and too tempting -and a tiny bit dangerous but it was worth the risk.

"Is he watching?" Jin asked

"He is."

"On a scale of one to ten, how bothered is he?"

"He looks composed but I'm pretty sure he's dying to yank me out of your arms."

"Should I spice things up for you?" Jin wiggled his brows playfully and you knew exactly what he meant without him saying the words.

It was tempting, really, but you decided to spare your boyfriend.

"No, it's fine." You smiled at him. "Can you cover up for me?"

"Sure. Now you leave me alone. Aren't you lovely?" He snickered, but smacked your butt playfully, pushing you away from him. "Go."

And you did.

You glanced one last time at Namjoon, winking at him, knowing beforehand that he was about to leave the party.

And he did. You barely managed to reach your car that he grabbed your wrist and crashed your body hard against his. One hand tangled in your hair while the other moved from your wrist to your jaw, his thumb gently rubbing it. His face was so close, his warm breath caressing your face.

"Now, that wasn't very nice of you." He commented, his eyes burning with lust

"Hm, what are you talking about, babe?" You feigned innocent -to what he answered by tugging at your hair a little harder but it did not hurt. If not the opposite.

"You're playing a rather dangerous game." His thumb moved slowly from your jaw to your lips, pressing his thumb softly at your lower lips and you parted them without hesitation. "What a pretty mouth."

You inhaled sharply, lost in his touches, lost in his eyes. You bit at his thumb playfully making him wince but then he trapped your face between his warm hands, he leaned closer but hovered just above your lips, breathing each other's air.

"You're driving me crazy, I hope you know that." And then, without a moment of hesitation he captured your lips in at first what seemed to be a gentle kiss which quickly turned into a rough one with biting and bruising and lost moans. You wrapped your arms tightly around his neck, lifting yourself higher, deepening the kiss.

"My place?" You suggested between two breathless kisses.

*****

Having a brunch with your dad should not be something surprising or scary. Except it was. The only time he asked you to have lunch or diner with him ended up in pure frustration and annoyance; he never truly cared about you or what you wanted. At least it was how you have felt for all these years. You would always end up talking about work, about ongoing trials and his new projects and risks. You hated how he used your brain for his dirty business. But once you were born In this environment there was no way out. It was something both you and Namjoon understood all too well. It was one of the reasons that made your relationship so complicated.

But this brunch was different.

For instance, instead of having it at his place, he took you out to a nice restaurant, on a terrace among happy families. It weirded you out while your dad looked completely relaxed and happy. You were bewildered by his behavior, his looks too. He wore a simple white shirt with short sleeves and simple black trousers. He looked too normal, too simple and you forgot for a moment he was the leader of one of the most notorious gang in Seoul.

"Stop looking so tense." He said while cutting his food. "I'm not here to talk about work."

"Really?" You could not stop the sarcasm dripping from your voice

"I deserved that one." He admitted and you chocked on your juice, completely taken off guard with his words.

Who was this man and what had he done to your father?

He chuckled at your reaction but did not comment it, instead, he drank his coffee while observing your face. "I heard you broke off the engagement with Jin."

You froze right on the spot. Nobody, except Jin and you, were aware. It was something you had decided without telling anyone. You could try to save yourself -you knew after all how much he wanted you and Jin to be together, but he would know the truth anyway.

"How-"

"How do I know?" He beat you at it. "Why are you surprised? I know many things."

He did not sound angry to your biggest surprise, or disappointed which without a doubt was a tiny bit confusing. Either your dad had something on mind, or he really respected your choice. Which you highly doubted. But still, it would have been nice.

"And no, it's not a trick."

"Are you reading my mind?" You asked, upset.

He burst into laughter, eyes wrinkling as he did so.

"Why are we having this talk?" You could not help but ask

"Why? Can't I have a nice brunch with my daughter?" He put his hand on his chest being dramatic and reminding you of your mother. She was the one who saw problems everywhere and took everything to heart.

"From where I'm sitting, you have something to ask me again." You explained and observed his reaction. You wished he was genuine about this whole father and daughter thing.

"Fine. I do have something to ask." He finally admitted with a long and tired sigh.

"I knew it!" You exclaimed almost proud of yourself

"But it's not what you think." He was completely unfazed. "How's Namjoon?"

You froze for the second time in a lapse of five minutes. Your heart clenched hard in your chest as you feared the meaning behind his words. You looked at him, trying to keep your face straight but you were too shocked to think properly.

"Namjoon?" You repeated. "I don't know?"

"Really?" His smile threw you off guard. He took a sip of his coffee and looked at you, amused, and looking way too happy. "I must say, I didn't see it coming. I refused to even believe when I heard of it."

''I bet you did' you wanted to say but for now you kept your mouth shut, biting your tongue hard, trying not to show any sign of your nervousness so he could not use it against you.

"But then I saw you at the gala." He stared at you waiting for any kind of reaction -that you refused to show on purpose. "You two are good at hiding and pretending but I've been doing it for years."

"I really don't know what you're talking about."

"Did you know that one of the man Namjoon killed for you actually had a wife and a five years old son?" Your father said as if it was nothing and he started cutting his food again.

He won. He fucking won once again. You gasped in shock, your heart beating frantically inside your chest at his words.

"What?"

"I'm pretty sure Namjoon knows it too." Your father added. "But. He had one more reason to kill him since he was a snitch. But still."

"Dad. How about you stop playing games?" You asked tiredly and you rubbed your temples in hope to soothe the start of an unwelcome headache. "What do you want?"

"I want you to know that my quarrel with his father has nothing to do with you. Namjoon is a very interesting and clever man, I'm not stupid. Yes, it upsets me to see my only daughter to fall for my enemy's son but what can I do? I can't lock you, you're too clever for that."

You actually were at a loss of words. For the first time since forever your father seemed so genuine and so concerned about you, it almost freaked you out.

"Let me meet Namjoon. I want to have a proper talk with him. If you want to date him, fine. But we need to discuss your safety."

You were left completely dumbfounded.

What a rollercoaster.

****

⎪You

[4:00pm]

So. I had a brunch with my dad.

⎪Joonie

[4:10pm]

???

⎪You

[4:12pm]

I actually have no fucking clew what to think.

⎪Joonie

[4:14pm]

You must be really confused if you're cursing.

⎪You

[4:15pm]

Ha! Wait to see what I have in store for you. You won't be laughing mister!

⎪Joonie

[4:16pm]

I'm shaking, o mistress.

⎪You

[4:18pm]

Fuck you.

⎪Joonie

[4:20pm]

Now? I'm about to meet with my dad.

⎪You

[4:22pm]

Kim Namjoon. You better get your ass ready because my dad wants to me you.

⎪Joonie

[4:25pm]

As in for business?

⎪You

[4:26pm]

As in 'how the hell did you seduce my daughter'.

⎪Joonie

[4:28pm]

Wait.

⎪Joonie

[4:29pm]

Are we talking about your dad? As in your father? As in the man that wants to destroy my family?

⎪You

[4:31pm]

Now you sound too dramatic. I wouldn't say 'destroy'.

⎪You

[4:32pm]

Though he might want to kick your ass.

⎪Joonie

[4:34pm]

Babe!!

⎪You

[4:35pm]

Sorry. He knows about us. Ever since the gala.

⎪Joonie

[4:37pm]

That was three months ago???? Why did he wait?

⎪You

[4:39pm]

No idea.

⎪Joonie

[4:44pm]

Is it a trap?

⎪You

[4:47pm]

Honestly? I don't know.

⎪Joonie

[4:50pm]

I'm going to die.

****

Namjoon was nervous.

So were you.

You had to admit that ever since your dad asked to meet Namjoon, you expected it to be some kind of plot to get his revenge on Namjoon's father. So when your father suggested to meet in a rather small but cozy Japanese restaurant, you coughed awkwardly ready to ask him 'are you sick?'.

"Are you really not scheming some evil plan?" You had asked your dad the day before the meeting.

He had only rolled his eyes before patting gently your cheeks. "I'm not that evil when it comes to my daughter. You have nothing to worry about."

It should have comforted you, but what were the odds that someone like your father would accept his only daughter dating his enemy's son? You were suspicious and anxious and Namjoon felt it the moment he came out of his car and joined you before the restaurant.

"Nervous?" He asked as he went straight for your hand, intertwining your hands together, he brought them closer to his lips and planted a soft kiss on your knuckles before gently rubbing it with his thumb. "I am too. But I believe we did nothing wrong. Maybe we can open their eyes."

"Does your father know about this meeting?"

"He does." And after giving it a thought, he added, "He didn't seem surprised either."

"Did we miss something out? Isn't it weird? I mean, Taehyung probably knew about us since he helped us to get together. Jin figured it out at the gala. But they have never seen us together, have they?"

You frowned at your own words, slowly realizing that them being so chill about the situation felt wrong. Namjoon, however, only shrugged, ready for anything that their parents were about to throw their way.

"Let's find out. " Namjoon gave you a comforting squeeze before pulling you inside the restaurant.

Whatever laid before you, you would face it together.

But maybe you were not fully prepared for what was waiting for you.

The restaurant was absolutely empty. No clients, no waiters, no host. It was just empty and cold. You glanced at each other, equally taken aback, but then your eyes widened in shock at the sight of two men chatting at a table in the middle of the room.

"That's-" You started completely flabbergasted

"Our dads." Namjoon finished it for you and somehow in the middle let go of your hand as he got closer to them. "Dad?"

"Oh you're there!" Namjoon's father's face broke in a huge smile. The same lovely smile and the same dimples than Namjoon's. "And YN, long time no see."

Lost of words, you simply nodded your head. Your eyes darted back and forth between your father who had a rather amused glimpse in his eyes -he tricked you somehow, and Namjoon's father who looked positively proud too.

"Why do I feel like we've been tricked?" Namjoon ruffled his hair, groaning softly. On one hand, he felt relieved to see that it was not a deadly trap and that his own father agreed to meet. On the other hand, he had been played and despite his brain he did not see it coming which lightly hurt his ego.

"Come on. Have a seat, both of you." Your father pointed at the two empty spots in front of them.

"I wonder why they look so tensed." Namjoon's father commented, openly mocking you but with good intention -you hoped so at least.

"How?" Namjoon asked as he sat in front of his father

"Why is this place empty and yet there are seats for more?" You added quickly. Yes, the place was empty but there were two more chairs at your table and two more plates. Your father -and probably Namjoon's too, never left anything without a good reason.

"Because you were taught well. You're on time while those-" Your father started explaining, sounding just a tiny bit irritated.

"Waaa, why is it empty?" An awfully familiar and loud voice made you tense in your seat.

Namjoon snapped his head to the side, and so did you, so fast that you heard a cracking sound. Taehyung and Jin stood at the entrance, just as stunned as you, gawking at you two and at your parents. Your eyes darted back and forth between the two men, mouthing a 'what the hell are you doing here?' But they only shrugged.

"Sorry. This boy," Jin said as he pointed at Taehyung. "Had a hard time waking up."

"Excuse you but I just came back-" Taehyung tried to defend himself but a groan from your parents made him shut his mouth and roll his eyes in annoyance. "Fine. Whatever."

"Are you going to tell us now why are we all here?" You asked, eying suspiciously your parents while Taehyung and Jin took their respective seats beside you and Namjoon.

"Well." Namjoon's father started. "At first, it was obviously to talk about you two. But then, we realized that there are more important things to discuss."

You arched a brow at him, even more curious. Judging by how amical they both were, it appeared now clear to you that you had missed something important while trying to hide your secret.

"You see, Y/N. When your father called me and asked if I was aware of your relationship, I almost hung up on him. But then, I remembered spotting you at the court the other day with a rather familiar item on you." Mr. Kim explained. "Can you guess what it was?"

Namjoon groaned loudly and face palmed age his own mistake. To what his dad only chuckled.

"It's fine, son." He quickly added. "I bet your mom knows about it too since Y/N has the ring now."

Oh.

"When I realized what was going on, I decided to ignore our differences and meet." He finished

"Wait. Why did you wait?" You asked, confused as to why they decided to keep their mouths shut and just wait. It did not make any sense considering how they always fought.

"Why those two are here?" Namjoon suddenly wondered out loud.

"They helped you, didn't they?"

Taehyung shifted nervously in his chair while Jin refiled his glass with wine, completely unbothered by the accusation.

"Well. Now that the cats are out of the bag, I can finally get back to dating. Thanks god." Jin raised his glass for a toast and without waiting for any comments took a sip. "Good choice."

"You are all spoiled children." Your father said. "Taehyung, you broke your rules for your friend. You, Namjoon went against your duty as the future chief and you, my daughter, you sacrificed your own people to for the sake of your relationship."

"Are we getting scold?" Taehyung suddenly asked both you and Namjoon, leaning closer to you. "Because I feel like I'm sixteen again and it's kinda annoying?"

"Tae. Behave, please." You elbowed him right into his ribs making wince and get away as far as possible from you.

"Jeez." He pouted

"You're the next generation of leaders that's why we're here." Your father cut to the fight

"What?" You were surprised by his statement because you never considered yourself as the next generation, mainly because you never wanted to be a leader.

"I'm going to step down and I know you don't want to take over me. That's why I wanted you to marry Jin." He glanced at Jin before looking back at Namjoon. "But it seems like I might need to change my plans."

You felt how Namjoon suddenly tensed beside you. From outside he looked impassive, calm but from inside he was dead nervous. You grabbed gently his hand under the table and gave it a comforting squeeze.

"What do you want us to do?" Namjoon dared to ask

"Oh I want nothing from you, son. I'm not the leader anymore." Mr. Kim's answer took all of you off guard -in the exception of your father who of course already knew all of that.

"What?"

"And since I'm not the leader anymore. Do what you want. Marry her, stop this conflict. It's your call."

You had a hard time to believe what you had heard. Not only was your father stepping down from his position but so was Namjoon's. It confused you to no end.

"We're entrusting our business to you. Show us what you can do. All of you."

****

December 2019.

It was past one in the morning when both you and Namjoon got back from another family dinner that, you had to admit, had changed dramatically. No longer those meetings were boring or a source of stress to you. No, it was filled with laughs and smiles and for a moment you forgot all about who you were. You loved those changes and no matter how hard the way to this outcome was, you had no regrets. Not when you were back to Namjoon's flat. Back to the place that was now your home too. Back to the place with the most beautiful view in the world. Back to Namjoon's side.

"Hey." Namjoon whispered right into your ears as he wrapped his warm arms around your shoulders, pressing you against him, as you both stood by the window in the living room, admiring the view as the first snow finally started falling down.

"Hey you." You whispered back and lowered your head a little so you could plant a soft kiss on his hand.

"Did I tell you today that I love you?"

"Maybe. But I won't mind hear it again."

"Good. Because I love you."

"I love you too."

#bts scenario #namjoon #bts #bts fanfic #namjoon x reader #namjoon fanfic #namjoon fluff #rap monster #jin #only you

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the-benevolent-beast · 5 years ago

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December 5th, 4:48 pm

"William!" a sweet voice rang out into the spacious foyer and further as one of the large front doors shut and locked; Jade shook out her whole body free of the snow that clung to her fur, as it had just freshly snowed that late morning, before she started padding her way further into her old original family-name home.

The home itself was fairly large and had been constantly added onto as the Korlov's generations lived on and more members were born; which meant it was fairly spacious and... quite lonely. So many more rooms were added as Korlov's were born due to one of the odd traditions the family seemed to do- sealing a room when the resident of said room passed away; to preserve the room out of respect. Every time a member passed, a room was sealed; every time a member was born, either a room was put together for the new addition to the family or a whole new floor was built depending on the space needed. Now, on the outside of the large building it looked well put together and intentionally kept consistent, though the interior had its flares and uniqueness here and there. But again, point is; it was large, and it was lonely. With her brothers living at the new (and smaller) Korlov Estate all the way in Oregon of the US, Jade decided about a month and a half ago that she'd take up residence in the old Estate that had essentially been abandoned, though not on purpose. A month and a half ago, Jade decided to come back to her first home, and a week or so ago.. someone joined her. She had caught up to him before he had walked himself into something he would have never escaped, and she had offered him a place to stay when he admitted he had no where to go after a big argument and eye opener with his previous... 'Guardian'. So, its not as lonely anymore, thats for sure!

Light clacking of hind claws on old hardwood sounded as Jade looked around, though there seemed to be a slight quickness to her step, as if she was excited about something and wanted to find her new housemate as fast as possible. She held a large messenger type bag and brought it forward as she started to fish through it as she walked, pausing after a moment as she dug deeper into it; from an outside p.o.v, it definitely seemed bigger on the inside of the bag than it did on the outside. "Will?" she tried again, an ear flicking. "Yeah?" a curious voice rang from a floor up, along with some footsteps, at the beginning of the stairs in the cross-room; the cross-room being the room that held the stairway to the second floor and was the large room between the foyer and the spacious livingroom. Will made his way down and leaned on the railing by the landing for a moment to look down at the benevolent beast he had somehow made friends with, though he was beyond grateful he had, if anything. He was surprised really when she had offered him a place to stay, no strings attached... but oh goodness was he grateful, and honestly.. really happy she of all people had offered.

"There you are!" Jade purred, a smile on her lips as she turned to his direction, "I wanted to.. um, talk to you about something!" "What kind of something...?" He responded cautiously as he moved onto descending the stairs to join her, looking on as she finally brought out something from her bag, smiling shyly and handing it to him. It was... a Christmas themed flyer? Or at least, thats what he thought it was, as the wording was in russian but the picture depicted a decorated tree and a decorated and lit up square of some town or city who knows how far away.

"I visited the nearest town, though.. its really not near- but still! And they've decorated awfully early-" "Early? But its early December, dont people normally start decorating for Christmas around this time or sooner?" "Will- you gotta remember,, you're in Russia now, they celebrate a bit differently and at a tad later time.." "They? I thought you said you were russian?" "I am- but I say they because our fam-.. because my brothers and parents celebrated it the more American way; since we were so secluded here and since we moved out to the US to a similar-ish area before everything.. went bad- its not like anyone could stop us from celebrating the way we wanted." "Oh... okay- well, what did you want to talk about? Whats this flyer gotta do with it?" He seemed confused, rubbing his neck as he looked down at the flyer in his hand again. Jade seemed to get shy, rubbing her cheek and her tail curling, "Well.." ”?” Will watched her, raising a brow. "..I kinda wanted to do.. a Christmas party? or something?" Her ears folded back slowly as she waited for his response. Will looked to her blankly for a moment, thinking- the idea seemed to make her happy, but.. a party? "..but like, who would we even invite? You're scared of revealing to your brothers and I want Him to stay as far away from me as possible.." He grew serious for a split second at the end there before shaking his head slightly, pursing his lips, "So, it'd just be us- a two-man party.." he shrugged slightly, smiling shyly as the idea grew on him, "I wouldn't mind that, honestly..?" Jade tilted her head slightly as she thought for a moment, "Well.." Will frowned just a smidge.

"...I was thinking.. there's Ella?" Oh, Ella- the poor girl cursed with passed down lycanthropy that LJ had held captive and tortured whenever he felt; "I found out she's with RLJ now.. has been for a bit actually- and where Ella is, Thomas is- or uh, the large Crow that would hang out on the bigtop's pole tip.." William watched Jade quietly as she rambled, the thought of it not just being the two of them both making him feel a tad odd- mainly about having others around- and it also made him feel weirdly... cheated? And the presence of someone who resembles LJ made him unsure, and it showed on his face. Jade frowned slightly at the sight of Will not looking as sold on the get-together idea as she had hoped... "..I mean, I wanted to run it by you first instead of just.. doing it.." That snapped Will back to full attention, making him raise a brow again; "Why?" "..I mean you're my housemate now; you have as much say in the things we do here as much as I do... I didnt just wanna go ahead with something- like a party for example- without asking you... ya know?" she grew sheepish, rubbing her cheek and tilting her head down slightly. Will's cheeks flushed just barely, making him look elsewhere- it must have been the combination of her including him on big decisions, including and thinking of him at all, and or calling him her housemate.. He sighed, then smiled- so what if others joined them? Though he was unsure about RLJ still, he smiled with a shy edge; "Well, in that case.." "..You'd be alright with it? It'd be alot of work.." Jade seemed nervous, not wanting to make him feel overwhelmed with all the things they’d have to do. Will chuckled, "Whats first on the list?" The pale beast smiled and stood straight, the fluffy fur of her chest puffing out slightly as she purred deeply, "Really? You'd wanna?" "Sure! Whats the harm in a bit of.. uh,, sharing Christmas festivities..?" He shrugged slightly, sounding unsure of his wording, but seeming up to it holiday challenge nonetheless. She looked so happy about it, he just couldn't help but give in...

"..Even if we invite RLJ?" "..Y-yeah, sure," "..He's not Jack- I mean, he is- but like,, he's not..? He's not the Jack you just left, if anything he's leagues better-" "Yeah, I know..." he muttered, sighing curtly through his nose, "Its fine, I promise.." He attempted a genuine smile to make her feel better, though he looked a bit tired at the mention of either clown.

"So.." he tried to change the subject, looking around and then back to a hopeful looking Jade, "Whats first?" Jade bit her lip before her ears perked up and towards him, "Making some invites...?" "You mean, one invite? since they'd all be in one place, right?" "Yeah! yeah.." she purred quietly, tail curling and her hands moving to hold themselves as Will lifted his free hand and gently pet between her ears; which granted some soft but slightly louder purrs from the beast in front of him, her ears folding back. They both seemed to relax...

There's alot of work to do... @askoldlaughingjack Note: This is a slightly different AU / Universe Jade and Will Ellzilla’s Universe Will and Jade to be specific, not my usual version of the two Usual Jade and Will, and the rest of the party of this blog, are currently suspended during this event!

#non ask #Christmas Event; Part 1 #Idk if all of these will just be written #or if some will have drawings #but yes.... c h r i s t m a s e v e n t

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mingyaus · 6 years ago

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last min bf ch. 1

series ch 1 > ch 2 > ch 3 | last min bf series masterlist

summary the world’s bigger now. humanity has gone beyond earth and inhabited many other planets. earth has basically become this uninhabitable, over-studied wasteland, yet some people still have a dangerous curiosity for their home planet, including you and min yoongi.

paring reader x myg

genre humor, barely angst, reader insert, sci-fi!au

warnings drinking, partying, and almost some drug use

word count 4.2k

You’re not supposed to care so much about anything, about any of this, yet you still find yourself in a corner away from your dancing friends wallowing in a shallow tide of thought. There are just a lot of things going through your mind right now, like how you forgot to grab a change of clothes for tonight, about how you just ate too much and are probably going to have to take a dump in the bathroom, about how the rest of your life is quickly approaching, about how the end of a chapter in your life is coming to a close. You all have just graduated high school. High school. You can’t believe they still call it that after Earth’s first major power shift, which is when the United States was joined by a few other countries that joined the rank of “superpower—

Thoughts concerning your Earth History class shuffle around in your brain for a while. Eventually Min Yoongi slips into your mind. Well, actually he slips into the high school graduation party (this is the version without any parentals, all the official grad parties occurred days ago), a few hours late (approximately two hours after the 7 pm start of the party), but everyone knows parties at spoiled-rich-boy-party-host-prodigy-with-never-present-parents (literally the only reason people are friends with him) Jackson Wang’s house never really end until 24 hours after the start, so a few hours doesn’t make a huge difference.

Sitting at the end of the main hallway above the ground floor of the Wang’s many floored home offers many advantages. There’s a large window where you can see everything going on in the front yard, anyone who tries to enter the home cannot go in without your eyes scanning them. The main advantage is that you get to witness the not-surprisingly late entry of Min Yoongi, and for another, it allows you to keep an eye on your friends while avoiding any damaging activities. Your friends aren’t really doing anything damaging actually, no one has touched the alcohol or drugs subtly scattered about the house yet. They’re just talking about things you don’t want to think about right now—some other planet politics and music—and you have too much weighing on your mind to contribute or ask probing questions to entertain them.

Min Yoongi pops back outside again and makes a sprint past the portable space ships and other modes of transportation littering the Wang yard and the street across from the lawn. There actually aren’t that many houses in this neighborhood, so nothing blocks your view as you watch Min Yoongi sprint another block down to a nearby park and a wired fence where a space ship is parked. He pulls a handle and brings out his keys pulling just to see that it has already been locked. When he sprints back to the Wang’s front yard he looks upset, like he went all the way out there to make sure the door was locked when it already was. You didn’t see the purpose of locking the ship because the neighborhood is the among the nicest in this planet, maybe even this universe. Definitely in this country, but no one measures things by country anymore because space is just too big now to allow separate masses of land or archaic legal borders to make much of a difference. Even cultures do not create much tension, at least different cultures within one planet. Interplanetary relationships can cause the worst kind of trouble.

He disappears inside the home, and for a while you watch the stairs secretly hoping he would join you at this little look out spot. But why would he though? You two never talk. The only times he “would join you” were at podiums always receiving awards together. You are—or now were because you two just graduated—among the top 5% of students at your school. High achievers, top performers. You’re both in that group of kids who always win at everything. It feels good to be at the top, but still lonely. Your friends are a diverse bunch, mostly in grades. Kim Namjoon, the other 5%-er in your friend group is probably your most distant friend, always studying instead of hanging out, and you’re mostly just friends because your other friends are friends with both of you.

Mutual friends bring people together, and that’s what Yoongi is doing here. You feel an urge to go downstairs and find him, like this is your chance to finally get to know this person you’ve always wanted to get to know.

“Hey! Y/n, wanna play a game?” Kim Yerim yells at you from inside the bedroom where your friends have been spending their time at the party. “Stop being emo, and join the group! That or I’ll make you cry your eyes out then send you home after parading you around the living room!”

You sigh, still lost in thought about possibilities and anxieties for the future, not quite ready to let go of high school even though it’s already let go of you. Yeri gets out of the bedroom, and drags you in. A deck of Cards Against Humanity sits in the middle of a circle formed by your closest friends, and a few acquaintances. A few rounds pass, the game goes quickly due to some people’s lucky hands (you’re probably only saying that just because you suck at this game). Suddenly Yeri calls for a bathroom break, and she’s taking too long, so you leave to go find her. The second floor is quiet except for all the commotion coming from your room, and the bathroom is empty, so you go down the stairs to find your petite friend. When you find her, she’s chatting up a familiar figure: Min Yoongi.

“Oh, hey, Y/n! I was getting a drink, then ran into Yoongi, my friend.” She pats him on the chest, leaning oddly close to someone you’d describe as her acquaintance—they’re not that close, really they should not be talking to each other considering the fact that Yoongi is in Jeon Jungkook’s inner circle. It seems like Yeri’s already had a few drinks during her extended bathroom break. Yeri’s tipsy, and you know it. In her right mind, she would never even approach anyone with at least five degrees of separation from Jungkook. In some ways Jungkook and Yeri’s messy relationship could be blamed for why you and Yoongi are so distant.

You’ve always admired Yoongi for his brains. There were a few classes you shared, but your classes were always too big for you two even participate in group discussions with each other. Every so often, you two met at the podium receiving awards for academic feats. This is how you first took notice of him. There wasn’t a specific award giving function in which you remember becoming truly aware of who Min Yoongi is. You just became conscious of his presence. Sometimes you would even have the honor of standing next to him, parts of you brushing against his arms.

Man, Min Yoongi is such a fine guy.

You always wished you had gotten to know him better during high school. Your mind was just too occupied on other guys (a failed homecoming date, and a decent prom friend date) and school to get around to him. There was also the great divider between both of your friend groups. And that has to do with a former couple consisting of Jeon Jungkook and (as she likes to be called) Vampire Princess Yeri, Future Queen of Huth (a made up planet, she pretends to be from). The two were an inseparable pair during junior year. Though everything began and ended very quickly by the end of eleventh grade. A messy break-up having to do with abortion, broken CDs, and hair ties is what it took to break the two apart. Ever since even their friend groups have felt the angry tension that still lies between Jungkook and Yeri.

And that tension is what’s making this round of truth or dare so competitive. Somehow (truth be told, it’s the alcohol and nostalgia) Yeri and Jungkook have been pulled together in the Wang family’s second floor guestroom. In an effort to keep things civil both of their friend groups decided to join in on this reunion, and Min Yoongi is the genius who suggested the game of truth or dare. This game, which could risk bringing out old memories, could also quickly divert attention from one dramatic event to another. And with the ten or so people already playing lowers the odds of Yeri and Jungkook coming in direct contact with each other. Also, you could be imagining this, but Yoongi appears to be sitting the closest to the bottle you have all decided will determine the next victim in the game. Maybe it’s so he can quickly move the bottle in case it could cause Jungkook and Yeri to interact. You’re theorizing now, and decide to set those thoughts aside in order to better enjoy the game. All in all, you admire Yoongi’s quick thinking and continue to admire him, especially after you dare him to do twenty push ups, and he does thirty with the petite Yeri sitting on his back.

“Wow, man of the hour Min Yoongi seems to have been chosen by the bottle once again!” Jeon Jungkook shouts. Everyone’s relieved because Jungkook is seated right next to Yoongi, and the bottle was about to land on the younger man, but thank, God, it didn’t.

“Truth or dare?” Yeri asks. She’s smiling. It’s her turn to dish out the truth or dare, and she was almost faced with the pressure of talking to her ex. They haven’t talked in so long, and everything was such a mess. She should be shaken, but you quickly notice that your theory was right. The reason she’s smiling is because of the genius Min Yoongi, who was able to pull a sleight of the hand trick and force the bottle to move just a little towards him.

“Truth, sure.” He smiles back at her.

“Earth. What are your honest opinions about it?” You gulp, Yoongi gulps. Everyone is a bit shaken that she would ask such a question. Earth, everyone here’s home planet (“home” used lightly, no one was actually born there), has been hot in the news. The topic is essentially like what abortion was in 2018. Right now, Earth is essentially humanity’s dying grandmother. Ever since wildfires, and other climate change events have taken over the planet, scientists decided one of the major priorities is relocating humanity. This was also controversial. There are essentially two sides to this argument. One thought that the priority should be preserving Earth and protecting it. The other believed in getting out of Earth as soon as possible. Obviously the side that had more money on its side won, and that the was latter side. Businesses found a money making opportunity in spreading humanity throughout the universe. New land to buy, new industries to come, etc. So humanity survived through spreading itself throughout the universe and adapting to new places. In the present, no one lives on Earth. People who were there either were killed by the climate or moved out. The first people to move off Earth were the richest, those who could afford to escape Earth’s capitalism to the new capitalistic worlds beyond Earth. The final generations were among the lucky middle class, including your family, and many others who live on the planet that you reside. Fourth generation non-Earth born families like the Wangs are rare here, but they are the highest of society. Most people who live on this planet are children or grandchildren of Earth-born people. The preservation of Earth is still a controversial subject. Currently, the planet is in a state of environmental turmoil. It’s uninhabitable, and people are barred from going to it. Many people are against spending any new money made in space on Earth, including many people in this room.

“Uh,” Yoongi gulps. He’s an honest man, doesn’t want to lie. That and mostly because he’s had a few drinks and that makes him too honest, a fool. “I’d love to visit it. I think it’s a beautiful planet, and we should take care of it. Hm, like I’ve actually been thinking of sneaking over and visiting it. I have an extra long summer this year, why not?”

“What?!” The first shout comes from Kim Seokjin, another member of high society. His family made much money off of leaving Earth, so it makes sense as to why he wouldn’t care so much about the mother planet. “You have no idea what you’re talking about. There’s no reason to keep that garbage planet around anymore—”

And he’s cut off from all the other screams erupting and attacking Min Yoongi. The circle is closing around him, and the only thing preventing people from touching the man is Jeon Jungkook. The muscle pig fends off anyone that physically tries to attack Yoongi.

You decide that this shouting fest is a signal for you to leave the room. Yeri’s sitting next to you, and she’s not into all this vocal and almost physical violence, so she takes your hand and gets up so you two can get out. You guide her to the little nook you were sitting in before. You two are still close enough to hear the screaming, but it’s quiet enough for you two to talk.

“Well, that was wild.” Yeri says. “I thought Jungkook and I in the same room would cause conflict, but apparently Min Yoongi’s words are ten times as powerful.”

“Yeah,” You take a breath. Yoongi and Jungkook are slipping out of the room in front of you two, running downstairs or somewhere to somehow escape the mob that’s following them. You quickly turn around afraid they’ll read your thoughts. Your voice drops to a whisper, afraid the mob will hear you. “You know, I actually agree with Yoongi. I think Earth is great, and would wanna visit it. Like we wouldn’t have to worry about oxygen shortages or any oxygen-related problems for once.”

“Hm,” Yeri nods, taking in what you just admitted. You trust the girl enough with this somewhat secret opinion of yours. “I actually agree with you on some level, though I would never want to visit it myself. I just don’t think we should toss it to the side. Too much history. It feels wrong.”

“Yeah! You get me.” You squeeze her hand, you’re still clasping, a little tighter glad you’re not alone in your thoughts.

A few minutes after you and Yeri witness Yoongi’s escape, Jeon Jungkook comes rushing up the stairs. Alcohol heavy in his breath, he kneels down in front of you two and takes Yeri’s hand in his. Looking at her directly in the eye, he mutters, “We need to talk.”

She simply nods as he stands up and leads her into the now empty bedroom where the turmoil began, and some may begin again. You, worried about another messy fight starting, rush into the room, panic building in your stomach. “Hey, I don’t think you guys should be talking alone.”

“Psh, shhh, shh, Y/N. You know how calm alcohol makes me, same with Jungkookie. This is probably the most peaceful we’ll ever be with each other, don’t worry.” The words spill out of her mouth quickly, and her eyes stay trained on Jungkook’s as they sit down on the floor next to each other, their strangely positioned bodies facing you and still holding hands. They look dumb, but you’re still worried about them.

“Nah, Y/N, don’t be a worry wart. I just want to get some closure before we leave for university, it’s been such a mess, and I just want to get some last words in before we both never see each other again. You know how it’s like nowadays.” Jungkook says in a rushed manner. He’s right though. People stay in school longer, getting post-graduate degrees right after their undergraduate degrees in order to get halfway decent jobs. Science is most popular occupation, so after getting PhDs or whatever, people go on immersing themselves in long-term studies for the rest of their lives. You know that Yeri is going after this common career path, so you can understand why Jungkook would want some literal final words with Yeri.

“Okay, before I leave. How’s Yoongi?”

Jungkook finally takes his eyes off Yeri to respond to you, “Hiding out. He’s planning on leaving in a few minutes.”

“Thanks, bye. Don’t fight.” So you slip out, but kept the door open just in case the former couple begins causing some trouble.

You are once again stationed at your little window spot, looking out into all the vehicles parked. Yoongi’s shiny, silver spaceship catches your eye once again. After hearing his honesty about Earth, you suddenly feel more drawn to him. The urge to converse with him about his thoughts on Earth is so strong. You two have something significant in common. This attraction mixed with the strange feeling of listening to Jungkook and Yeri’s whispers of final goodbyes (as well as the few drinks Yeri peer pressured you into drinking earlier) is what motivates you to go outside and stand right next to Yoongi’s spaceship waiting for him to arrive.

In a few minutes, just like Jungkook said, Yoongi gets outside to his ship. He looks like a classic emo boy, with his hands in his pockets and hood up covering most of his face, most likely to mask his identity from the mob that he miraculously escaped from.

“Hey!” You wave at him. You’re smiling, looking more friendly than anyone else he’s seen at the party all day. He’s still worried about the mob, so looks around to make sure no one followed him out and you aren’t baiting him into some trap. “I swear, I come in peace.” You flash him a peace sign, and that makes his lips curve into a little smile.

“Okay, but step behind the ship with me. I don’t want to be caught next to her—”He points at his ship—“and get her hurt by the mob.”

“Uh, alright.” You trust him enough that he won’t harm you, so you get behind the ship with him, hidden from anyone exiting the Wang household. You two are quiet, staring out at the fenced in open field Yoongi parked in front of. “Hey, uh, I thought that it’s pretty cool that you want to go to Earth.”

The quiet boy, turns his head, finally looking at your face. “Really?”

“Yeah, I’d like to visit it too. It’s a thing I’ve been thinking about for a while.”

“Psh, no way.” He rolls his eyes in disbelief.

“I actually really love planets and space. I think all the planets should be respected and taken care of.”

“There are planets everywhere. With ‘scientist’ being the most popular career today, a lot of people like planets and space. What makes you special?”

“Okay, I did not expect to be attacked with such a specific question. I would have thought someone just mobbed by a bunch of Earth-haters would be more peaceful.”

“Fine, okay. I’ll chill. Sorry, I get like weirdly honest and attacky when I’m drunk.”

“It’s alright.” A silence envelopes your conversation again. “Do you like seriously, really want to go to Earth?”

“Mhm.” Yoongi nods, turning his head to look at you again wondering about the thoughts going through your mind.

It’s probably the exhilaration of finally getting to talk to this guy you’ve never really been able to talk to before that gives you the courage to suggest this dumb, fun idea. “I feel the same way. Well, I think we should go. Together.”

“Now?”

“Uh, I mean, shouldn’t we plan it or something?”

“I’m a really good pilot, and I keep a go-bag in my ship for emergencies. I actually have this whole plan made and prepared for going to Earth. I just never had enough courage to act on it. Though knowing someone else is into going to Earth, I’m really down now.”

“Wow, I didn’t think me wanting to go to Earth would motivate you that much.”

“You’re that cool, Y/N.” Now, you’re blushing a little and turn away humbled by his compliment. You never really go out that much, so actually going to Earth is really wild for you, but your adrenaline is running so hard that you actually agree to this foolish plan.

“Sure.” You nod, still avoiding his gaze. “I just need to pick up some things from my house.”

“Won’t your parents be weird about you coming home and then disappearing for an extended period of time?”

“Psh, no they’re off on a business trip. What about your parents?”

“I have no idea why, but they’re cool with this Earth trip, as long as I let them know.”

“What? Are they insane? This is illegal and dangerous.”

“They’re that cool too.” He giggles, thinking his repeated statement is somehow clever. Then he unlocks his ship. “Get in.”

“Alright.” You climb in and watch as he almost trips getting inside.

“Wait, are you still drunk?”

“Mhm.” He nods, putting his keys in the ignition.

“Uh no, no. No drunk piloting.”

“Okay, then you pilot.” He takes out the keys and hands them to you, almost getting out of his seat.

“I’ve never piloted before, and I’m a little drunk too.” You hand the keys back to him. He looks at you, a little shocked expression on his face.

“You took AP Mechanics, but you’ve never flown a spaceship before?”

“No,” A little smirk crawls onto your face remembering that one time during a quiz when Yoongi got called out for not knowing what a car was. “But at least I know what a car is.”

“Okay, okay.” His cheeks are red, you’re not sure if it’s the alcohol or him being embarrassed. You didn’t bother looking at his face for so long earlier, too shy after your proposal. “Lemme sober up, then we’ll go.”

It’s like two hours later, and your third time using your portable breathalyzer on Yoongi, and he’s still drunk. For most of the time, silence fills the ship. Yoongi lets out an aggressive exhale of frustration, then starts digging into his pocket for something. A few seconds later, a joint and a lighter appear in his hand.

“You want a hit?” He asks you more casually than he should be asking. Yoongi’s calm tone makes it sound like you smoke weed with Yoongi frequently, which you don’t.

“What the fuck, Yoongi? This planet is so strict on drugs, how did you even get that?”

“Shh, don’t worry about it. Also please stop attacking me with your words. I’m about to pilot us to Earth, I’m a lil’ stressed. I don’t need your bitchy voice stressing me out more.”

“Okay, fine. But you know this is an oxygen rich environment, so you shouldn’t have any open flames. Also, YOU’RE TRYING TO GET SOBER. Please don’t get high in the process of so-called sobering up, you idiot.”

He rolls his eyes, and puts the joint and lighter in the console between you two. “Noted for the next time I want to smoke in an oxygen pod.”

“How about we talk to pass the time?”

“Genius idea. What do you want to talk about?”

“What do you want to do? After this, after high school.”

“Study to be a nuke engineer. Blow things up, boom boom. I love the idea of destroying villages.”

You look at him, with a confused expression unsure if he’s being serious or sarcastic. “Really?”

He looks at you too, shrugging his shoulders. “I guess. I mean, like seriously I want to be a nuclear engineer, but I’m just all morally conflicted about it for the reasons I listed before. A lot nuclear engineers end up working in the war industry, and I don’t know if I want to deal with all the morality in that without being willing to put myself on the line or experiencing these things face first. I’d want to experience the war first.”

“Have you ever considered joining the military?”

“I’ve always wanted to be a nuclear engineer, but only recently I’ve been thinking about the military. I actually have an intent to register, like one of those physical contract things. Probably going to be shipped off to some basic training by the end of this summer.”

“Wow, that’s wild.” It really is. There’s a high likelihood of him dying while in the military, considering all the interplanetary wars going on right now, but there are also many benefits for joining—discounts on anything you can think of, free education, free healthcare that actually works.

“I’ll be studying while serving, then I’ll probably leave and do something with my degree. I don’t really want to die.”

“Good idea.”

“Yeah,” He chuckles, thinking about his fragile morality. “Speaking of good ideas, what good ideas do you have for your future?”

“Well, I’m going off to another planet for immersive university studies. Obviously, like everyone everywhere I’m going to be a scientist. Though, I’m lucky enough to have already scored a spot in a study, which I’ll probably end up dedicating my life to.”

“Not nearly as wild as my plans, but safe.”

“Yeah, but I really want to get out more, but I’m already kind of locked in to my future.”

“Well, good thing we’re going to Earth then.”

author’s note The chapters are relatively short, but I’m splitting them because each chapter has a corresponding song. Lmbf was inspired by “Youth” by Troye Sivan, “Secret” by WJSN, and “Run” by BTS. Parts of each song have inspired parts of each chapter, but each song has its own dedicated chapter. “Youth” is this chapter’s main song.

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yeomangamer · 7 years ago

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After My Father’s Funeral Chapter 6

Summary: Funerals can be stressful, but so can weddings–especially with a family as effed up as theirs. Unfortunately for Leia, she has both to attend in one go. So much for repression. Modern AU

Pairings: Leia/Han, Mara/Luke, Jyn/Cassian, Leia&Han&Luke&Mara&Cassian&Jyn, Uncle Owen/Aunt Beru

Chapter summary: Mara and Luke had not been looking forwards to their party, and if Leia could've predicted the future, she wouldn't have either.

A/N: This chapter contains explicit/mature content under the cut, after the line break. Ya’ll been warned. Thanks to my friend @padmenaberrje for being my beta and a great friend. Please check out the Ao3 and FFN versions for full author’s notes

It was a week to the wedding. Everyone Leia had ever known from college and high school was at Mara and Luke's residence. She hadn't attended a ton of parties in college, but this was already bigger and wilder than she'd ever seen. But that wasn't difficult. The wildest party she'd been to was in law school: a guy passed out and people had drawn on his face, some girl had cheated at that party, breaking up a 5 year relationship. There had maybe been 20-25 people in total attendance.

Mara and Luke were not stripper people, and had opted to have a combined bachelor/ette party. Neither of them seemed too excited to potentially be embarrassed in front of their peers, but did it after so many people asked what they were doing. Leia was under the impression that because of their squeamishness, people were going to act that much raunchier. Guests had brought obscene posters and games on top of gag gifts. Leia was waiting for the stripper to come in uninvited, and decided she would leave at that point.

Two of her three vacation weeks had passed her by, and she was dreading the last one. Had things gone according to plan-had Skywalker not ruined everything once again-her plane would have landed that morning. Maybe she would've been excited to be here instead of being in a funk after spending the day staring at the wall in Luke's old bedroom, browsing Twitter in between existential crises.

She was already a little tipsy and planning on at least getting mildly drunk. Jyn and Cassian were nowhere to be seen and Mara and Luke were opening the gag gifts in the living room. That left Leia on the stairs, not really in the living room, nor out. Most people left her alone, but Han Solo wasn't most people.

"This seat taken?" He asked as he sat down on the step below her. He was wearing a blue button-up plaid shirt with short sleeves over a white t-shirt and jeans. He looked good in a rugged sort of way. As he always did.

"Now it is," she said, looking up at him.

He took a look at her, assessing her current state. "You drunk, sweetheart?"

"Not yet." She smiled at him, a wide smile. Her usual inhibitions weren't working, but she didn't feel out of control...yet. "Say, what's with the nicknames, cowboy?"

He laughed. "Easier than remembering real names."

Her face fell. "You don't know my name?" She was more than a little hurt by his comment, joking or not.

"Of course I do. Lily was it? Or Lorelei." She got up to move, but was stopped by his hand on her wrist. "I'm joking, Leia. I know your name."

She sat back down. "Not funny."

"Man, don't tell me you're a mean drunk."

"Of course I'm a mean drunk. I get drunk and I mean it." He laughed pretty hard at that one.

They watched the party unfold, people laughed and drank. Music was playing and it was generally a great vibe.

"Did you help plan tonight?" she asked him, and he shook his head.

"Nah, this has to be the easiest best man gig in the history of weddings. Luke is so low maintenance, its almost infuriating." He settled onto the step. "I only had to write a speech and buy a vest."

"And show up." He pointed at her and nodded.

"I won't forget that, I promise you. Write a speech, buy a vest, and show up. Two down, one to go." They toasted to that and drank. The scene in front of them continued to unfold.

"How did you get into the racing scene?" Leia asked after Mara threw the edible underwear she'd received from a guest at their face.

Han chuckled at Mara and bit his lip in thought. "I'd picked up odd jobs in and after high school, a lot of mechanic work. I honestly can't remember not wanting to be a driver, but...it took a while before I finally got behind a wheel. And even when I did, it was rough. And it wasn't always legal. I lost a lot of races, a lot of money, and nearly hung up my career at the ripe age of 25."

Leia raised her eyebrows. "Really. What changed your mind?"

Han smirked. "Kessel Run. That win launched my career. All of a sudden I was turning away sponsorships 'stead of begging for them. I was able to get the Millenium Falcon, the first real racing car I'd ever owned. No longer had to borrow from Lando or some other racer, I had my own car. I had my own life." He was in his own world then, looking out at the party, but lost in his own memory. "Even if things crash and burn, literally or figuratively, I had that moment, you know? That moment of doing exactly what I wanted to do."

"That's inspiring." Leia nodded. "I'm afraid my own career isn't nearly as satisfying as that."

He laughed, and she smiled. "You'll get there, sweetheart. We've both still got a lotta livin' to do." They sat in silence for a moment, drinking. "So what made you want to be a lawyer?" He asked as Luke puffed up an inflatable penis.

Leia laughed at the scene in front of her. "Sorta like you, I think I always wanted to be a lawyer. But it wasn't until the Ruling that I understood exactly."

"The case you and you brother were in." Han clarified.

"Yeah, Luke told you about it, right?" Leia took another sip of her drink. Who'd've thought alcohol was the answer to not thinking about painful memories.

"I'd heard about it. It was all over the news when it happened. Luke's told me some details, but-"

Leia huffed, feeling in a very overshare-y mood. "Well, what do you know, what do you wanna know?"

Han seemed surprised she wanted to talk about it, but continued. "I know your father wanted custody, and you and Luke were reunited, but not much else."

She gathered her words carefully, even in her slightly drunk state. "We weren't just reunited, our entire world view was shattered." Leia took another drink. "We both knew that mom—our biological mother—died due to complications with childbirth, and that dad wasn't around."

"But neglected to tell you who he was?" Han was sitting a step lower, leaning next to her onto the step she was sitting.

She nodded. "What he was and about each other."

Han looked thoughtful. "Wait, you didn't even know about-? You thought you were an only child-"

"Until my 16th birthday, yeah. That's when they told us."

Han was shocked, and Leia couldn't blame him. No one seemed to want to remember that detail, that they had both been lied to by the people they trusted the most.

"Why didn't they tell you?"

"'It was simpler that way.'" Leia quoted her own father, Bail, on that one. "They claimed they were going to tell us when we turned 18, but…"

Han scoffed. "Was that what they told you to make you feel better?"

She nodded and fingered the sleeve of her jacket, neither of them spoke. "Imagine receiving news like that. If you absolutely have to, you would hope that your parents would sit you down nice and calmly, and tell you the whole story when you're ready to handle it. Definitely not when you receive a subpoena for your DNA."

Han's jaw dropped. "A subpoena? How did they let it get that far before telling you?"

"The record for Luke and mine's adoption was supposed to be sealed until we turned 18. I don't know how Skywalker found where we were, but the court needed to prove paternity in order to even consider opening the file. They—my parents and the Lars'—had argued that since there was no father listed on our birth certificates, there was no grounds to examine the file. The judge disagreed, he wanted to be thorough." Her eyes itched and she scratched them, her fingers coming up wet. She was crying. "We lived in the same town, Han. Opposite sides of a picket fence. I could've walked by him on the street, and I probably would've made fun of his clothing to my friends. My parents, I loved them so much. I could care less about paternity, the Organas were my parents. But they didn't tell me I had a brother, a twin! We shared a womb and they separated us. I love Luke so much, he's everything to me." She was on the verge of blubbering now, the tears streaming down her face.

Han sat up a step and wrapped an arm around her, handing her a napkin. She blew her nose. Damn, she'd thought this trauma had been long-since buried.

"He ruined my life, Han. First driving my mother away so she died alone, then being such a fuck up, that Luke and I had to be separated, then dragging us through the courts for what reason? The judge ruled against him, but allowed visitation. Luke even lived with him for like 6 months. Then, as if all this wasn't enough, he caused the death of my parents." She blew her nose again, and wiped her eyes on her sleeves. She tried to compose herself, failing miserably. The words kept pouring out of her. "And don't give me that 'He changed, he wrote a book.' It doesn't matter. If he hadn't been such a- such a fucking bastard, we could've been a family, we could've been happy."

Up until this point Han had been silent, only keeping his arm around her. Everyone had crowded around Luke and Mara with their backs to Leia and Han. No one had seen her break down but him. He pulled her into his chest for a tender embrace, he rubbed her back as she sobbed into his chest. After a minute or so, she was finally able to compose herself (as well as she could) and pulled away, reaching for the drink she'd sat down.

"I think you've had enough." Han took the cup from her, setting it down by the stairs.

She wiped her eyes on her sleeve and blew her nose on the almost disintegrated napkin. "Sorry to ruin your night with my problems, again." The shame was hitting her hard. This was why she didn't overshare. This is why she didn't go to parties and drink. This was why she never went back home.

"Do you always apologize after admitting your problems?" He took his arm out from around her.

"What else are you supposed to say after baring your soul to someone?" She'd felt she'd offended him somehow when he moved away from her. In that moment, she only wanted comfort.

Han stood up and she immediately felt the lack of his warmth next to her. She looked up, certain her makeup—which she had put on painstakingly in Luke's old bathroom—was a mess. "I'm not sure. Wanna take a ride?"

She blinked at him. "In the Falcon?"

He nodded. "I told you, I owe you. You're leaving in a week, right?" He stretched out his hand to her.

She nodded and took his hand. He pulled her up and they slipped out the front door.

You need more scoundrels in your life, he had said. Right before he'd kissed her. He had taken her for a drive along the backroads of Naboo county, almost driving an hour until they didn't see any sign of civilization. Leia felt as though they had landed on a different planet, there was so much wild around her. He had zipped and zoomed, before they finally settled within spitting distance of the the suburbs. That was when she told him he was a pretty good driver.

"For a scoundrel," she qualified. She'd sobered up some, but her stupor had turned to a more pleasant buzz. The drive had been more exciting than she had thought it would be.

He'd leaned over to her seat and stared directly into her eyes, that smirk of his as prominent as ever. Her skin had never felt hotter. "You need more scoundrels in your life." Then he'd kissed her, deeply, passionately.

His tongue slipped between her lips and she ran her hands through his hair. His hands pulled her jacket off, feeling the bare skin of her arms and shoulders, slipping around her waist to pull her as tight as the confines of the car would allow. At this point, she was seriously thinking about the logistics of the front seat, the back seat…the ground outside even, when they broke apart. His eyes looked as bright and wild as she felt, and she was wondering if he meant multiple contexts of this "ride." But he turned to start the car and sped off before she could think too hard about that.

His house was small, big enough for two people maybe, with a three-car garage. She could see the lights from the city in the distance, but not too close to be intrusive. She felt as though she were in a dream. He led her inside. She barely got a look at his home—which screamed "bachelor" to her—before he was leading her to his bedroom. He kicked Chewie off the bed, and put him outside.

She sat on his bed, looking over her shoulder at him, having already taken off her jacket. The door shut with a click and she felt the tension in the room change. This was happening. He sauntered over to her slowly, taking off his plaid shirt and letting it fall to the floor. He kneeled down in front of her, parting her legs to sit between them, nose to nose with her. His breath was hot on her face as he leaned in to kiss her cheek, her jaw, and finally her lips. Her heart pounded in her chest as she pulled on his t-shirt to pull it off. They parted to let the garment pass, and Han moved to her neck, kissing down and over her collar bone. She took in a small breath as she felt his fingers creep up her legs under her floral dress to pull down her panties. Up until then his touches had been chaste. He moved back up to kiss her mouth as he rubbed the outline of her labia and moved deeper with each stroke slowly. Too slowly.

"Force, Han, are you going to keep being a tease or are you going to-" She demanded, hornier than ever. But before she could finish he dipped his head down, in between her legs. She gasped and moaned as he licked and sucked his way around her clit before tongue-fucking her. She barely registered that she was pulling on his hair extremely hard as she approached her orgasm. He introduced his fingers back into the equation, leaving her a wet mess. "R- right there, y- oh!" She came without making much of a sound as she fell back onto the bed. She felt him wipe his mouth on the hem of her dress, his breathing heavy.

"How's that for teasing, sweetheart?" She could hear his indignant smirk in his voice.

She sat back up, pulling her dress over her head and dropping it next to him. "I swear to the force, Han. If you don't put your dick inside me, what was the point of all of this?"

He stood, undoing his belt, and letting his pants fall. "So much for being coy, princess." He moved forwards to kiss her, laying her back against the bed.

He seemed content to rub against her for a while, and Leia was not. She shoved at his shoulder and he broke apart, taking a big breath in.

"You wanna- (huff) stop?" he asked. "I can t-" She pushed him over and onto his back, throwing her leg over him and straddling his middle. He settled his hands on her hips. His eyes were wide as she placed open mouthed kisses onto his collar-bone. She discarded their remaining clothing, and he'd pulled out a condom. She rolled it over, and settled herself overtop of him. She was still very slick from his meal earlier, and she slid him inside with ease. They both took a breath, eyes locked onto each other.

"Satisfied?" he asked.

She made no reply, only rolled her hips, eliciting a moan from both of them. She did it again, and again, finding a rhythm. He held onto her hips like he was holding onto a lifeline, bucking up into her. She stopped moving her own hips, preferring his movements to her own. She threw her head back, moaning and palming her breasts.

"Force, Leia, fuck." He pushed her back onto her side and she moved onto her back. He wasted no time settling back on top and inside her, she wrapped her legs around his waist. He buried his face in her neck, suckling on her earlobe as he found his same rhythm again. She hissed and moaned as he found that spot inside her, hitting it again and again. His hips were stuttering now, but had more force behind them and she cried out each time his hips met her's.

"R- right- there- right!" She squeaked and felt the sensation wash over her once again. His movements stopped with a single, powerful thrust shortly after and he heaved one last cry into her hair.

Hours—days it felt like—later, Leia was lying awake in the darkness of his bedroom. His arm was slung across her bare stomach, and he was sleeping soundly. He snored, she'd discovered, but that wasn't what kept her awake.

This was wrong, so wrong. How hard had she worked to get herself out of Naboo? Only to end up back in. Force, she'd told him about her father. She'd cried on him about her father. How pathetic was she?

A scratching at the door finally made her get out of bed. She passed over his t-shirts for the jacket she'd worn at the party, pressing it to her chest so that the important parts were covered—at least from the front. She opened the door and let Chewie in, delighting in the serenity of Han's backyard illuminated by the waxing moon. It looked as though he hadn't mowed it since the start of summer. There were old pieces of junk sitting in the tall grass, but there were also terra-cotta pots making up a small garden.

She closed the door and sighed, looking back to the bed to see that Chewie had taken the spot she had previously occupied. She took this as her sign to leave, and started pulling together her outfit from the party. It wasn't easy hunting around in the dark, but she'd eventually recovered all but her bra. She faintly remembered being on top of him in nothing but her underwear, and he'd made some snarky comment about whether he should leave his socks on if she was going to wear her bra. In hindsight, it was definitely a line to get her to strip, but it had felt good in the moment to fling the garment across the room. Force, how much of what he'd said had been lines? "You need more scoundrels in your life", "don't go retreating into your shell when it took so much to get you out of it", "I have better things to do." Well, now, he would have time to do anything, except her.

She abandoned the bra as a lost cause, let him proclaim her as a conquest if he chose. She looked back over at him on the bed one last time and wondered if he'd mistake Chewie for her in a morning haze. Her phone buzzed as she walked out the door to her Uber. It was Jyn: "Where r u?"

She texted back: "Sorry, Han took me for a drive in the Falcon, I'm on my way home."

"Party is still happening (confetti emoji)."

She got into the backseat. "I drank too much (sick face emoji), I'm going to bed. See you later though."

"Text me when you get home."

She did.

#sw #star wars #star wars: original triology #star wars modern au #star wars au #han #lei #han solo #leia organa #leia skywalker #han x leia #han/leia #fic #my fic #kisstheprincessofpurewhite #after my father's funeral #after my fathers funeral #after my father's funeral chapter 6

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mayorgalvan · 8 years ago

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The Rothschild Zionist Banksters... Why They Love Making War! Search

4:49 / 43:33The Rothschild Zionist Banksters... Why They Love Making War! AshwaqSubscribe827Add to Share More45,820 views958 40ShareEmbedEmail Start at: Published on Jun 12, 2015The Rothschild Zionist Banksters... Why They Love Making War! All credit for this video must go to Zane Henry and Michael Rivero. I only re-uploaded it to help get the word out about the people killing all of us for money. The Bankers! . Written and spoken by Michael Rivero. The written version is here: http://whatreallyhappened.com/WRHARTI... Original Video: All Wars Are Bankers' Wars http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hfEBu... Video by Zane Henry. This video is in the public domain. The producers have waived their copyright to this video. Listen to a post production conversation between the producers by clicking on this mp3: https://soundcloud.com/eonitao-state/... You are welcome to make copies and to distribute this video freely. A free downloader is available here: http://www.dvdvideosoft.com/products/... You might need this CD burner application (because the above application might be a little buggy) http://www.2download.co/cdburnerxp.ht... If you have a PC you can use the above link (download the software first) to download it and burn it to a DVD and it is easy to do it. It is for your friends that don't have a computer and may have a DVD player instead or to give out to the public as a form of activism. If you have a Mac you need a Mac compatible YouTube downloader and you will have to use iMovie or somtn to do it. If you have any trouble you may write to me or search YouTube for tech answers. If you would rather have someone do it for you go here for DVDs (really affordable): http://www.dollardvdprojectliberty.comCategoryLicenseCreated usingSource videosEducationStandard YouTube LicenseYouTube Video EditorView attributionsSHOW LESSCOMMENTS • 324 Add a public comment...Top comments Master of Zero10 months agoWhy are these Rothschild rats even aloud to live ??Reply 66 View all 50 replies ST I1 day agoSeriously this is tin-foil hat stuff. The Rothschilds financed the battle of Waterloo. That was not a banker's war that was a war of domination in which our side (British/US/Aus/NZ/British Canada) was victorious. I find it really sad that this sort of stuff gets traction. If people learnt History in schools it just would not happen. The bigger story is why do people not learn history in schools .Reply Gina Brosman1 year agoThe Blood Sucking ROTHSCHIDS have stolen trillions from America!!!!Reply 40 View all 36 replies Arthur Fiorillo5 days agoDead flies make a perfumer's oil stink, so a little foolishness is weightier than wisdom and honor. 2A wise man's heart directs him toward the right, but the foolish man's heart directs him toward the left. 3Even when the fool walks along the road, his sense is lacking and he demonstrates to everyone that he is a fool.…we know how you walk down the street FOOL!Reply 1 jdareyah1 month agoOne of the first places the Zionist Rothschilds had their Central Bank was in Germany. Matter of Fact Rothschild is a German name meaning Red Shield which they adopted. With that said, anyone who thinks Hitler was at odds against the Jewish bankers/People is completely clueless of history. It was Jews who put Hitler in Power, it was jews who financed Hitler and Hitler worked for Jews. Also NAZi is short for AshkeNAZI and also National Zionism....The Jews were the NAZIS'. Let go a little deeper, The USA after WW2 under code name Project paperclip brought NAZI scientists to the USA to perform experiments, and so forth in which we get NASA. But here is the $6 million question. Why would Jews who run our govt (USA) bring NAZI (Their supposed enemy) to the land they control as a ally? Unless they wasn't enemies at all and were the same people.....Jews are NAZI, NAZi are Jews. Lastly, Hitler was raised by Jews (adopted) look it up. He was their puppet just like Trump, Obama, Clintons, Bush and all other so called world leadersRead moreReply 27 View all 27 replies wuteva341 year agoWar = PROFIT Reply 20 Andre EWERT1 month agoBankers Motto: we don't make Wars, we fund them...lolReply 19 View all 5 replies Stan Dalby1 week agoAndre EWERT Macmillan, New York, p. 326 * When people of this class are stricken by guilt feelings while plotting world wars and economic depressions which will bring misery, suffering and death to millions of the world’s inhabitants, they sometimes have qualms. These qualms are jeered at by their peers as "a failure of nerve". After a bout with their psychiatrists, they return to their work with renewed gusto, with no further digressions of pity for "the little people" who are to be their victims. Carroll Quigley : Tragedy & Hope The Ultimate Bankster Quote – from a former Governor of the Bank of England (1920 – 1944) Posted on April 4, 2011 | 32 Comments “Capital must protect itself in every possible way, both by combination and legislation. Debts must be collected, mortgages foreclosed as rapidly as possible. “When, through process of law, the common people lose their homes, they will become more docile and more easily governed through the strong arm of the government applied by a central power of wealth under leading financiers. “These truths are well known among our principal men, who are now engaged in forming an imperialism to govern the world. By dividing the voter through the political party system, we can get them to expend their energies in fighting for questions of no importance. “It is thus, by discrete action, we can secure for ourselves that which has been so well planned and so successfully accomplished.”Read moreReply C Brown5 days agoI remember that one! As; It's not what your country can do for you; It's what you can do for your country! Trump's doing, exactly that ~ for his country!Reply 1 istt4 months agoThis video nicely ties everything together.Reply 18 Garrielee Peck11 months agodisgusting look at are countries now these fucking family's I hope one day the people will wake up and say enough is enough of all this they should be all in bloody prison these couple family's are destroying billions of people livesReply 16 View all 8 replies s galax1 week agoGarrielee Peck entire human history are manipulated by this rots leeches unless people start realising this they are gonna get washed into drains.....Reply 2 Kami Khan1 month agoExcellent Very informative video.Reply 9 David Adams1 week agoKami Khan does anyone have a good answer to these bankster s I do .it's called order1776.Reply 3 Rubin Schmidt4 days agoDavid Adams... Another "Declaration" ???Reply Mr4thetruth9 months ago (edited)Watched this video several times, each time it gets better.Reply 9 Rebecca Sanchez1 month agoMr4thetruth That is just what I am doing. History explained beautifully.Reply 8 apokalypse 20162 weeks agoits a great video , giving phantastic informations ....Reply 2 Jack Rizzo1 week agoI can't believe I found this video by accident. I have believed every word of this for years after doing my own research. I can't really add anything to this as it is perfect. You can indeed research everything in this video on your own and find the truth in every bit of it because I have over the last 10 years. When I saw Assad had banned the dollar in Syria in 2013 because his own currency was hyper inflating I knew instantly we would be accusing him of being a tyrant and going into Syria to kill him. Im sorry guys but the truth is the US has not been the good guys for a long time. Our military works for the banking cartel and they invade sovereign nations and kill leaders and install their own puppet governments under false claims and propaganda. Its disgusting.Read moreReply 5 donald clark2 weeks agoJared Kushner is a AshkeNAZI jew Rothschilds zionistReply 5 View all 3 replies donald clark2 days agoYes and they are many of them too.Reply qB Hawk1 month agoOnly 25 people has watched this? Must be common knowledge - it just was not taught this way in our school system. Everyone is hypnotized at birth, to not know who they are.Where did we come from and why are we here. It's like the blind came here to lead the blind when the answer is always in the mirror. History has repeated its message to capitalist ... A word that has hidden meanings. That is as above is below KARMAReply 5 Pure Water2 weeks agoAlternative Media is a treasure !!! I used to live, unconsciously, in a ring of lies.Reply 4 Richard Barton2 days agoyou have no idea how deep the rabbit hole truly goes...you can start learning right here: www.annavonreitz.comReply SkylineToTheSeaAndMe1 month ago (edited)The "money junkies" obviously aren't money junkies for the sake of money. They are money junkies to wield power and control over nations, governments, and people (politicians mainly). This is has it has always been. Money buys power and control. Their goal is that of the Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion: An entire planet governed by Jewish Zionist hegemony (Monarchs) as they believe their destiny "granted by God" entails. "Zionist Plans for World Domination": Baruch Levy, Letter to Karl Marx, La Revue de Paris, p. 54, June 1, 1928 Address of the Jew Laventria Beria, The Communist Textbook on Psychopolitics, page 8: “Use the courts, use the judges, use the constitution of the country, use its medical societies and its laws to further our ends. Do not stint in your labor in this direction. And when you have succeeded you will discover that you can now effect your own legislation at will and you can, by careful organization, by constant campaigns about the terrors of society, by pretense as to your effectiveness, make the capitalist himself, by his own appropriation, finance a large portion of the quiet Communist conquest of that nation.” “The Jewish people as a whole will be its own Messiah. It will attain world dominion by the dissolution of other races, by the abolition of frontiers, the annihilation of monarchy, and by the establishment of a world republic in which the Jews will everywhere exercise the privilege of citizenship. In this new world order the Children of Israel will furnish all the leaders without encountering opposition. The Governments of the different peoples forming the world republic will fall without difficulty into the hands of the Jews. It will then be possible for the Jewish rulers to abolish private property, and everywhere to make use of the resources of the state. Thus will the promise of the Talmud be fulfilled, in which is said that when the Messianic time is come the Jews will have all the property of the whole world in their hands.”Read moreReply 4 View all 5 replies John Pallyswine2 days agoRivero = a Spanish Catholic descent whose ancestors INVADED, EXTERMINATED, RAPED , DISPLACED and murdered innocent natives of the AMERICAS. The muSSlim loves to invade and killReply John Pallyswine2 days agoI LOVE ZIONISM. The only good muSSlim is a dead muSSlim Rivero = a Spanish Catholic descent whose ancestors INVADED, EXTERMINATED, RAPED , DISPLACED and murdered innocent natives of the AMERICAS. The muSSlim loves to invade and killReply Ashwaq1 year agoReply 4 View all 4 replies apokalypse 20162 weeks agowir deutschen patrioten werden uns in zukunft im amerikan. netz austauschen müssen , wenn das mit dem größenwahnsinnigen maasloch so weiter geht .... brd = ddr2 ... brd = stasi-diktatur .... kennst du die berühmte und schockierende rede von rabinovich ???.... google : REDE -- RABBI -- RABINOVICH -- 1952 .... bitte abspeichern und verbreiten !!!! .... hier noch ein paar video-tips auf youtube : HEIL MERKEL !!!! ...... MONIKA SCHAEFER -- HOLOCAUST .... DER HOLOKLAUS ..... VICTOR THORN -- HOLOCAUST .... URSULA HAVERBECK -- INTERVIEW PANORAMA .... DAVID COLE -- AUSCHWITZ ..... ERNST ZÜNDEL -- DAVID COLE ....Read moreReply 1 Andrew_koala2 weeks ago+Bubba Rogowski There is no apostrophe in Videos ( placing an apostrophe makes it VIDEO IS) Do you even know what an apostrophe is used for ? And Yes I already know about the videos you mentioned. And read more books to improve your English. And it wasn't the LAST war year 1945. Neither was it the LAST. Last means LAST - meaning no more to come -- That is what LAST means. Look up in the dictionary the meaning of the word PREVIOUS ...Read moreReply Lupita Cadena2 weeks agoThe Jews, the Rothschild's have been the cancer of humanity for many centuries. The Jews are known to be greedy, liars, murderers, road robbers, impersonators, thieves, diabolical manipulators, mind controllers who have position themselves in the highest echelons of the US society to suck the wealth of the whole nation and make us go and fight wars for their Zionist dream of Greater Israel, the New World Order and the conquest of the whole world.Reply 3 Larisa Vetrova2 weeks agoA remarkable video and most convincing - Yes, it sounds like there are only two classes of citizens: the Rulers-Murderers & the Slaves. Pityful and Yes Hitler did an astounding job for Germany between 1933 and 1938 when the US had been for a decade enslaved by a botched "New Deal" orchestrated by FDR and Wall StreetReply 3 mr halvi2 weeks agoAmerica has never been great the only thing that comes out of Jewmerica is Lust Greed and war and everybody's a fucking hero. can't wait for Hollywood to fall into the sea. and if you think Trump is going to save you, dream the impossible dream. and Clinton that fucking old cunt should be shot. the Globalists have everyone in their sites and the destruction of America is happening from within and in order for the NWO to happen America has to be destroyed and this is happening right NOW. But don't give up hope there's a PILL for everything that's wrong with America, I couldn't begin to imagine what would be happening in the country if there was no internet or iPhone (poof) no more service and what about the Pharmacy if they all of a sudden didn't have pills for the 92% of Americans on some kind of pill. They have been making movies about this for some time now. and the latest was WWz. The Jews have almost succeeded in total control just ask brother Nathanel the convert I mean the paid actor. When everyone wakes up it will be too late. Trump is receiving bad intel big mistake # bombing. war is eminent. Trump cannot stop what is about to happen but he will be blamed for it.Read moreReply 3 View all 6 replies mr halvi1 week agoThe federal reserve is the main part of the swamp, they should be charged with crimes against humanity.Reply 1 mr halvi1 week agoPersonally . I don't think The Trumpster can drain the swamp. it's to big and dirty on both sides, the only way is to pull an Adolf. Rumor has it Trump ran to position himself and his family for what's to come. does anybody really believe the elite will allow Trump to change their lifestyle , they'll play him like a deck of cards and force him to war just like in 1939.Reply Cheyenne Sellers5 days agoSo in a nutshell, the Jew Banksters will start a war if a country does not accept a Rothschild owned private Central Bank to lend money with interest to the country's government. This is what is happening in Syria today. Assad did not want a private Central Bank in his country, but relented to try to keep the peace. Didn't work out for Assad because the Jew Banksters were not happy - now they want two very profitable pipelines run through Syria. Also, North Korea doesn't want a Rothschild Central Bank and neither does Iran. The Jew Bankers are chomping at the bit to start a war with these two countries in the near future. If North Korea and Iran fall to the Jew Banksters, the financial arm of the New World Order will be complete.Read moreReply 2 Susan Miller2 days agoCheyenne Sellers also, the US dollar is only as valuable as the petrodollar system is on any given day - a system which helps line the vaults of these central banks... Qaddafi wanted to dump the petrodollar before he was overthrown.Reply Douglas Kay2 weeks agoMost of us have known this for years but pointing out facts to the majority is a waste of time.Reply 2 Show moreAutoplay Up nextBanksters - William Black tells the real truthMyfisto Pheles182,854 views8:06TRUMP IS THE SWAMP: Trump's Jewish Elite MAFIA and The 5 Dancing Israelis (2017)TruthMediaRevolution338,210 views24:04JFK Jr Unbelievable Cover-Up DocumentaryWorld Documentaries Channel1,046,240 views1:43:56Goy Guide To World History Part 1 - 7Veritas Vincit Omnia61,288 views2:47:08The men who crashed the worldFauzInfoVids3,407,873 views42:31A 6000 Year History Of The Jew World Order

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lecrit · 8 years ago

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malec fic rec

For the anon who was asking the other day, here we go!

As always, leave kudos and comments. Tell those wonderful people exactly how wonderful they are. They make our days with their talent, let’s give back a little ;).

You can find them all and my past fic recs on my fic rec page.

Personal favorites are marked with a ♥

BANIVERSE @baniverse

Hues ♥

Alec volunteers at an art organization known as Nephilart as a body artist. Magnus is his body model, and something special grows between them.

CLOCKWORKSWAN @clockworkswans

Hurting and Healing ♥

"Magnus freezes. It’s then that he realises. He should’ve seen it before. He’s fairly certain he’s crushing on his best friend. His neighbour. The one boy who grew alongside him." Childhood sweethearts AU where Alec and Magnus grow up next door to each other. Over the years, they transition from playmates to best friends to something more. But as usual, the path to happiness is always complicated. Oneshot.

CRAZYELLEPHANT @crazyellephantrambles

Wild Life ♥

Alec Lightwood likes to go on road trips. He doesn't pick up hitchhikers. But the one time he does, it's Magnus. He's in for an adventure or maybe even fall in love.

DORKBERTO @dorkberto

Bibliophile ♥

Despite what his sister thinks about his non-existent love life, Alec is not in danger of an oncoming descent into recluse crazy cat owner. For one; Church would eat his competitors for Alec’s undivided attention and two; Alec’s a little hung up over Magnus Bane.

EVERYDAYFANDOM @everydayfandom

And Then I Met You ♥

Sometimes someone comes along and throws you of your life path. And sometimes that's not such a bad thing.

FIREBLAZIE @fireblazie

oh lover, hold on (WIP)

The mask and goggles clatter to the ground. Isabelle makes a choked noise, and Jace whispers, paper-thin, “Alec?”

Magnus stops breathing as Alec’s gaze—cold, dead, and empty—comes to rest impassively on them.

“Who the hell is Alec?”

(Loosely based on Captain America: The Winter Soldier.)

HEARTSDESIRE456 @jchelseaw

A Fighting Chance ♥

When Magnus Bane bought the space for his dance studio, Pandemonium, he had no idea that the wall between it and the MMA Training Gym next door was so thin. Neither did he realize that a dispute over the loud music would lead to him becoming involved in the world of MMA and, more importantly, guide him to the man who would end up changing his life.

The Max Two ‘Verse series ♥

Alternate canon telling of Magnus and Alec’s story. Set in the TV 'verse but without any of the main story of the books or TV show. There is no Valentine Circle Uprising Thing going on. It’s pretty much just an alternative version of how Alec and Magnus and their child(ren) become the Lightwood-Bane family.

KETZ @sweetillusionketz

I Want to Root your System ♥

Magnus Bane has made a name for himself in the fashion industry after raising high against all odds and becoming the Editor in Chief of the world's most celebrated fashion magazine, Pandemonium. He's powerful, influential, and most of all, he's a genius.

Just not when it comes to technology. In fact, Magnus hates it with a passion.

So one can imagine his distaste when, after a huge thunderstorm, Pandemonium's office lost every in a short circuit and he was forced to buy thousands worth of new fancy products from Light Inc., the world's most renowned technology company.

Good thing all that high-tech crap comes with instructions in the form of Alec Lightwood.

Olympic Gods ♥

The Olympic Games were more than the biggest sports competition of the world. It was the time for gods to be born, for the mighty to raise and triumph over fabulous feats. Athletes from all over the globe challenged the human body and competed to be consecrated the very best.

It is a time of high expectations and even higher levels of emotions. A time for greatness, for glory.

But can it also be a time for love?

The Red Button ♥

After one black out too many, Ragnor and Catarina had enough of Magnus trying to drink himself to an early grave. It was time for an intervention and they had the perfect place in mind: The Institute, the best rehabilitation installation in the New York state.

Only Magnus wasn't exactly asked for his opinion on the matter. And if there is something Magnus doesn't like, is to be forced into something.

Maybe the Head of the Institute, Alec Lightwood, is enough of an argument to chance his mind?

This is a Bad Idea ♥

Alec Lightwood had a good life in Columbus, Ohio. He was growing strong as a lawyer in his mother’s law firm and achieving his dream-career step by step. He had a good life, comfortable and steady, if not a little boring.

So, when headhunter Magnus Bane offered him an interview at the prestigious IDRIS LLP in New York, Alec decided that it couldn’t hurt to take a look. After all, one didn’t turn down IDRIS LLP off the hat, even if they weren’t really interested.

Little did he know that New York offered much more than a job in a bigger company. The city was fast, insanely alive, but most of all, it had Magnus. And Magnus changed everything.

MAGICANDARCHERY @magicandarchery

Home For Christmas

It’s Christmas Eve and Alec is just trying to get home to his family to celebrate Christmas when he suddenly finds himself stranded in the airport, frantically searching for any other way to get home.

With the help of a kind military serviceman named Luke, can Alec make it home in time for Christmas?

Drive: Chasing Stars ♥

“A road trip?” Alec repeats instead, doing his best to hide the intrigued note in his voice at the description of the car as he sits in his chair, thumb running along the side of his middle finger. “Sounds fun.”

“I was hoping you’d say that,” Magnus’ voice holds a lighter tone than before. It’s subtle, but it’s there, and Alec knits his brow together. “The Pacific Coast Highway is beautiful this time of year.”

MALECISEVERYTHING @m-aleciseverything

Fools Rush In (WIP) ♥

Alec, Jace, and Simon go to Vegas for Jace's bachelor party and things get a little bit ridiculous.

Alec wakes up the next morning and...wait a minute, who's that in his bed?

MASTER OF UNLOCKING @withbrokenbones

Once Upon A Time In Brooklyn ♥

Once upon a time, in a faraway land called Brooklyn, an older-than-he-seemed Warlock lived in a fashionable loft apartment…

Magnus Bane angers the wrong warlock and ends up with more than he bargained for. Not only is he cursed to live out fairytales that risk his life in increasingly creative ways, he also has to find his One True Love within the year or face dire consequences.

An AU set in the canon universe.

OH_LA_FRAISE @ohlafraise

find a love to call your own

Alec couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so natural talking to someone—usually, he stuttered and had to scramble for things to say. With Magnus, it felt like they would never run out of things to talk about. The only hiccup was when the topic of careers came up; when Alec explained in detail how he worked as an editor, Magnus simply said he worked in fashion and demurred quickly. Alec didn’t push; he could imagine "I was a reality TV star" was a topic you would want to avoid on a first date.

AKA irreverent Christmas fluff in which Magnus Bane is a name everyone recognizes except Alec.

you're the light that i won't let go

There were three unspoken rules to the Manhattan Institute of Higher Learning, New York’s premier private K-12 school:

1) Respect that the space under the football bleachers was for sex, and only for sex. 2) Don’t eat the cafeteria meatloaf. 3) Never mention Mr. Bane to Mr. Lightwood or vice versa, unless you wanted the whole class to get extra homework.

OHPRONGS @lightwoodlesbians

it's close to midnight, and something evil's lurking in the dark

or, the ’i sneaked into this huge house party for some free alcohol but you asked me how i knew the host and the first excuse i could think of was that i'm dating their sibling, so i basically just lied to you about going out with you’ au

OTPPUREFUCKINGMAGIC @otppurefuckingmagic

Home

magnus disappears on a thursday. there’s too much alec remembers about that day.

STARWITNESS42 @baneismyexistence

Holding the Stick ♥

Alec Lightwood has dreamed of hoisting Lord Stanley since he was eight. It's in his blood. He's spent the last five years trying to make that dream a reality, only managing to fall short each time.

Until a scandal leads to a multi-team trade that sends Magnus Bane his way. One of the top performing wingers in the league. An up and coming star.

And the most handsome man Alec has ever met.

He's doomed.

#malec fic rec #fic rec #malec fic #malec fanfic #malec fanfiction #READ THEM ALL AND SEND THEM THE LOVE THEY DESERVE

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georgiabread · 8 years ago

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falling for you ; phan | chapter thirty two

Full summary ; Dan Howell is dead. Well, sort of. He’s a guardian angel, forced to protect only one human, and that human is Cat. But when he accompanies Cat to school, he can’t help but be intrigued by the broken boy with the black hair who sits by the window in class and disappears at lunch times. Dan realises this boy needs more protection than Cat will ever need, so he takes on human form to save him. But soon he finds himself falling in love, which is something he definitely can’t do. Dan Howell is an angel, and he’s falling for Phil.

Tags ; highschool!phan, teenage!phan, plantboy!phil, spaceboy!dan, angel!dan, phan, phan au, phan fluff, phan angst, chaptered

TWs ; bullying, violence, mentions of self-harm, mentions of death/suicide, depression, panic attacks, physical and verbal abuse, homophobia, foul language and supernatural themes.

previous chapter

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"This separation, time and space between us for some revelation you didn't care to discuss. I'd rather be black and blue than accept that you withdrew—"

phil ;

To: dan tha man 🔥

it's been 3 days and you still haven't answered my calls [delivered - 12.11.16]

To: dan tha man 🔥

do you really expect us to stop talking? [delivered - 13.11.16]

To: dan tha man 🔥

cause i really don't want us to stop [delivered - 13.11.16]

To: dan tha man 🔥

we can't keep going like this. what if i go to uni and you still haven't decided to fucking text me back? [delivered - 14.11.16]

To: dan tha man 🔥

i'm sorry for yelling at you and bringing up bad memories, i'm so sorry. but i'm not apologising for getting assaulted if you're still salty about that cause i never WANTED it to happen [delivered - 14.11.16]

To: dan tha man 🔥

i hope you know i bloody love you (a LOT) and i don't want us to end like this [delivered - 14.11.16]

To: dan tha man 🔥

look we're both idiots but you're turning into the bigger one. please call or text me back, i love you bear [delivered - 15.11.16]

If a colour could describe Phil's emotions in this moment, he would choose grey. Grey like flimsy clouds on an overcast day, suspended in the sky as if by tattered threads. Grey like his mother's eyes on the days they seemed to hang from her eye sockets, emotionless and dead. Grey like his bedroom wall, which was blue in actuality, but had turned dreary and dull in the low afternoon light.

Phil's eyelids blinked softly at the bare wall, head pushed into a pillow and legs folded up near his chest. He should've felt warm – a wooly jumper encased his torso, two black socks covered his feet and the house's heater had been switched on to combat winter. But instead his bones sat frigid under his skin and he felt colder than what any icy weather could make him feel.

He'd lost the ability to cry two days ago. Either he'd simply run out of tears, or the coldness had frozen them behind his eyes. His phone was clutched tightly in one palm, dead. Phil hadn't bothered to plug in the charger when it fell flat an hour ago. What was the point? He would only use it for one reason now, but that was a lost cause. It always had been.

If he was really honest, Phil didn't blame Dan for not contacting him. The night at the party had been the knife in their relationship, and the way Phil saw it, he was the one to blame. He had his mouth all over someone else, he shouldn't have shouted at Dan on the street, he was too clingy, too annoying, he wasn't enough. Dan was right to avoid him.

Phil's eyes fluttered shut and a memory flashed behind his eyelids. The day he had first taken Dan to his hideaway in the forest – a small smile crept onto his face when he remembered the wand fight, laughing until their sides hurt. But then he recalled something Dan had said, a promise Phil had been so daft to believe.

"My sorry ass is going to stick with you until you can tell me honestly that you are okay."

Typical of Dan, he knew. But Phil wasn't okay. And Dan hadn't stuck with him. Phil drew a deep breath which came out shaky, and he turned to press his face into his pillow. You idiot, you fucking idiot, he swore at himself. Dan was never going to stay with you.

Why had he let himself believe for one second that he was worth being loved?

His messages and calls to Dan had been pointless. Phil knew by now he would never get a reply. He didn't deserve one, not after all he'd done to ruin their relationship. He deserved nothing, not even his friends and family.

For years, Phil had seen himself as a dead weight. Unnecessary, disposable, a burden that would gladly be thrown away. For years it seemed as though everyone wanted to abandon him. But now one thing had changed – he wanted to get rid of himself.

It seemed all too easy. Now that Dan was gone, what else was he living for?

Phil huffed and flopped onto his back, roughly dragging his hands over his face. He barely noticed the hole in his stomach, left empty with no proper food for two days. The bedroom was dark, the blinds drawn, coaxing shadows out of their corners. He usually loved his room to be clean and clear of any mess, but dirty clothes were strewn across the carpet, his bed was unmade and half of his belongings had probably gone missing by now. It wasn't like Phil to throw himself into such a mess, but maybe if he hadn't allowed himself to get attached he'd never be in it in the first place.

Thoughts and discussions about the future had been abandoned. Pitying messages from friends had been ignored. "Moving on" was a phrase Phil found very difficult to even think about. Because despite everything, his optimistic side managed to grasp that sliver of hope that maybe things would work out in the end.

Phil missed Dan. That was why he tried so hard to believe in a happy ending. Phil missed Dan so dreadfully it seemed impossible to do anything else. He missed the feeling of Dan's warm fingers entwined with his own or threading gently through his hair; he missed the way Dan's caramel eyes would shine when he grinned and gave that obnoxiously loud laugh of his; he missed how easy it was to make him blush, and the way he'd find any excuse for them to touch – whether it be legs squished together, a hand on his arm or resting his head upon his shoulder. Phil missed simply having Dan around, as his presence was enough to make him feel at ease. He missed having someone to confide in, someone to lean on, someone whose hugs were really all Phil needed to feel better. He missed –

A soft knock on the bedroom door tore him from his thoughts. Phil blinked and reluctantly pushed himself up on the bed, running his fingers through his fringe to neaten it. "Um...who is it?" he asked, wincing when his voice came out cracked and croaky.

"Daisy," a small voice replied. "Can I come in?"

Phil relaxed a bit and allowed his sister to enter. He watched the door slowly swing open to reveal a pair of wide blue eyes and fingers picking timidly at the hem of a top. Daisy took one look at Phil before hurrying over and clambering up into his lap. Phil frowned sadly, helping her up and hugging two arms around her small waist. "What's up, Daze?" he asked, leaning round to look at her.

The child sighed and rested her cheek against Phil's chest. "When is Dan gonna visit again?"

Phil bit down on his bottom lip, heart breaking at the sadness in her tone. It looked like she missed him as well. "Daisy..." he started helplessly. "I don't...m-maybe someday."

"What even happened to him? Did you guys break up?"

Phil hadn't really told Daisy anything about their split or break or whatever it was. He hesitated in replying, furiously blinking back tears he didn't know he still had. To have someone else even mention it made it all seem much more real. "Well, it's a little hard to explain," he said quietly.

Curling her fists around his jumper, Daisy let out a small whine and squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't want you guys to break up," she whimpered.

"Oh Daisy, no, we're not – we're not breaking up," Phil rushed to comfort her, holding her tighter. "It's okay, everything's going to be fine. Dan and I are okay. Please don't be upset." He ran his hands up and down her arms to calm her down, wishing he could swipe away her unhappiness as well.

"I want Dan to come back so – so he can play dolls with me again," she murmured, pouting. "He was really good at making funny voices."

Phil couldn't help but chuckle quietly, remembering the few times when Dan had come over and Daisy had begged for them to play with her. It wasn't as bad as it sounded. They always had a fun time creating some absurd narrative with Daisy's dolls – and Dan's silly voices always made Daisy laugh. Phil often gave him fond looks in those moments, seeing how good Dan was with kids. "His voice for Mr Hubert was the best, don't you think?" he said, thinking of Daisy's stuffed duck.

"Yeah, that was really funny," Daisy giggled. "What about–?"

Their conversation was interrupted by a second knock on the door. Phil straightened up and hastily wiped his eyes just before Mrs Lester stepped into the room. She took one look at the pair cuddling on Phil's bed, and her face fell. "There you two are," she said softly, moving closer. "How are you feeling, Phil?"

Phil shrugged. "I haven't improved," he mumbled.

"Oh, honey." His mother brushed her fingers over his fringe and cupped his cheek, staring down at him sadly while Phil refused to meet her eyes. She hesitated, opening her mouth to speak but apparently thinking better of it. Then she said, "You know, it's not good for your health to be holed up in your room all day. At least come into the lounge, have a snack?"

Phil felt his stomach clench at the words. "I-I'm not hungry."

"You're never hungry, Phil," his mum sighed, and straightened up. Phil flinched at her sudden patronizing tone. "Please get out of your bedroom. I can't stand seeing you like this. Daisy, you too, come and eat something."

Phil let his sister slide off his lap, staring down numbly at the dusty carpet. Through his peripherals, he watched his mother follow Daisy out of the room, not moving himself. He wished all these emotions would just dispel from his mind and heart, that someone would take them all away. Ironic how Dan would usually be that someone, when he'd also caused them in the first place. No, not him. It was you, he told himself bitterly.

He ended up trailing behind his mum down the hall, thudding down the staircase and coming to a halt in the kitchen doorway. His eyes scanned over the fruit bowl bearing apples, bananas and grapes of assorted colours; a bread loaf wrapped in plastic sitting on the bench; and the array of foods sitting snug in the fridge when Mrs Lester opened it. After two days of eating nothing substantial, the endless food churned his stomach like butter. Before his mother could say anything, he left, slumping into a seat at the dining table. Daisy soon joined him.

Moments later there came the sound of keys rattling against the metal handle of the front door. Phil's heart jumped in fear when the door swung open and crashed shut, and heavy footsteps bored holes in the floorboards. He knew exactly who it was.

Stephen passed the open dining room and went straight into the lounge; this time he reeked of rage rather than alcohol.

"You're home early from work," Mrs Lester called out, stepping out of the kitchen.

Phil chanced a glance over his shoulder, watching as his stepdad collapsed into an armchair and ran a hand through his thinning hair.

"Got fired," Stephen snapped in reply.

Mrs Lester stilled, as did Phil and Daisy. The mood in the house was tense, as if it could be sliced in half with a knife. Stephen let out a low sigh.

"Well...you'll have to start looking for–" Mrs Lester began slowly, but was cut short by her husband.

"You think I don't fucking know that?" Stephen barked, shoving off the chair. "You know, why don't you get a job, Annabel? I'm the only one fucking doing things around here–"

"I do have a job, Stephen," Phil's mum replied calmly.

"And that one pays terrifically, doesn't it? Maybe if you and everyone else under this roof worked a little harder we might have a better roof." Stephen rounded the chair and strode towards Mrs Lester. Phil held his breath as his stepdad backed his mother against the wall and glared daggers at her.

"St-Stephen, please, you were just fired. How about–?"

Stephen jabbed a finger into Mrs Lester's chest. "Don't fucking remind me. You listen. I'm sick of being treated like the villain here. Who's the one paying for the food and electricity that comes into the house? Who's supporting this shitty family? Who's – who's paying their fucking education!"

Phil blanched as Stephen turned and thrust his finger at him and Daisy, glowering down at them. And then suddenly the man's mood shifted as his eyes focused upon Phil, and a smirk twisted his rough features. "Well. I see the faggot has rejoined the family," he said viciously. "Are you finished being depressed, you useless idiot?"

"Don't talk to him like that, Stephen," Mrs Lester growled, but it was of no help. Stephen's words were already drilling holes in Phil's heart, swirling like storm clouds in his brain.

Phil's eyes dropped to the floor as he mulled over the words. Finished being depressed. Shut up, shut up, it doesn't work like that.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you, Phil," Stephen said in a suddenly calm tone. He crossed into the dining room and came to stop behind Phil's chair.

Phil swallowed heavily and lifted his eyes to meet his stepfather's. Immediately Stephen threw out his hand and seized Phil by the chin with calloused fingers, yanking his gaze upwards. Terror stirred in the pit of Phil's stomach.

"What's up with you anyway?" Stephen snarled. "Can't you be grateful for everything you already have? There's nothing to be sad about, you piece of shit. You've got a privileged life with food and water – appreciate it."

The urge to correct him became stuck in Phil's throat, but Mrs Lester stepped forward. "Stephen, don't do this. Please just–"

"Depression isn't that bad, faggot. Get over it," Stephen continued. "But I've heard of a cure. You know, killing yourself."

"Stephen!" Mrs Lester shouted as Phil sunk back into his seat, tears springing up unanticipated.

"Annabel, please, I'm just kidding. Calm down," Stephen cried, whirling around to face his wife.

The rest of their argument drained away as Phil focused on the table centrepiece, a vase of wilted roses. The roses Dan had gifted him for formal. The outside petals were browning and shriveled; a few littered the surface of the table, nothing but shrunken curls of burgundy by now. Phil sniffed, staring sadly at the drooping stems and withered leaves until his vision blurred. That phrase repeated over and over in his mind. Kill yourself kill yourself kill yourself.

Would he even have the courage to do so?

Stephen was right, in a way, Phil realized. Suicide wasn't necessarily a cure for depression, but it did end it. Phil had no idea what would come after death, but surely it would be better than the life he lived now?

He watched the dead roses tremble when Stephen took a heavy step. It seemed cruel to let them remain on the dining table, when they had grown limp and faded. They were decaying within the glass vase, and weren't doing anyone any good. They ought to be thrown out. Phil dragged his hands over his eyes, wiping away any moisture, before reaching forward and wrapping his fingers around the stems. Then he stood, shoving back his chair. Daisy had disappeared and the shouting spat from his parents' mouths were muffled as Phil made his way numbly towards the front door. The green waste bin was outside somewhere – the roses were better off in there, he thought. That way no one would be disgusted when they looked upon them.

Before he reached the front door, however, he slipped into the first floor bathroom and glanced down at the cupboards below the basin. His heart gained speed, skipping beats as it thumped wildly against his chest. Phil crouched and pulled open the doors, eyes scanning desperately over the forest of various soaps and medication. There had to be something...

Phil zeroed in on a small bottle of Advil, pressed against the left wall. He hesitated, chewing on his bottom lip as he stared at the blue label. Just in case, he told himself, grabbing the bottle and stuffing it into his jean pocket. Just in case.

No one noticed when he walked out, shutting the door softly on his way out. Phil passed the waste bin and dumped the roses inside, shivering as a spiteful breeze buffeted his jumper. He paused, releasing a small sigh and glancing around the empty street. He never wanted to go back inside.

"But I've heard of a cure. You know, killing yourself."

Where would he go? Somewhere no one would find him. Phil frowned before remembering his hideaway again. It was perfect. The only other person who knew about it was Dan, and Dan obviously wasn't going to visit any time soon. Phil sniffled and shoved his hands in his pockets, taking off down the path.

The street was deathly silent, save for a single car that sped past. But Phil's heart thudded so fast he swore it bounced off the buildings and echoed in his ears. Would he ever come back? Was there a need?

Maybe he would, but instead of returning himself someone might be carrying his limp, lifeless body. No, he thought suddenly. You're better than that. Don't think about it don't think about it.

But it was hard when the bottle of Advil sat in his pocket like a dismal weight.

It didn't take very long to make it into town. From there it was only another five minutes to reach the school. What day was it again? Phil went to dig out his phone, but found his back pocket empty. Shit. He'd left it at home with no charge. He had the feeling it was a Saturday anyway, meaning the school would be hopefully completely empty.

No one spared him a second glance as Phil weaved through passers-by, although he knew he looked like a train wreck. He glanced in the reflective windows of a store, and sure enough there hung the black bags, sunken cheeks and unchanging frown. Not to mention the shadowy shades of his clothes. Phil almost couldn't recognize himself.

"Depression isn't that bad, fag. Get over it."

He needed to get to his hideaway. It was one of the few places where he felt calm. Then he could rest and think and – and...Phil shook his head and kept walking, running his fingers through his fringe. Stress clawed at his insides like a rabid animal, creeping up his throat, making his fingers twitch. His lungs felt constricted – someone had wrapped rope around them and pulled hard. All Phil could think about was what Stephen had said, what Dan had said, what everyone had done to him. All he could see were the black spots dropping like paint splatters in the corners of his vision, all he could feel was the Advil in his pocket.

His stomach thundered and suddenly his knees felt weak. He wanted to pass out. He should've eaten something.

Phil rounded a corner, using the wall of a building to keep himself upright. He trailed his fingers along the brickwork, walking past the local newsagent. Two people were having a conversation under the awning; Phil hurried past them, eyes cast to the concrete. But for a moment they flitted up, catching on a name that was all too familiar. Dan Howell.

Phil's eyebrows creased as he studied the first newspaper in its pile on a rack. His eyes scanned the headline, and suddenly he wanted to throw up despite the emptiness in his stomach.

INVESTIGATIONS INTO DAN HOWELL'S DEATH REOPENED

His legs buckled. Phil grasped the newspaper rack desperately and reached for the first paper. His hands quivered, his heart was skipping beats every second, he couldn't distinguish any of the thoughts in his mind.

It didn't make sense, it didn't make sense. How could Dan be dead?

Phil read the first paragraph on the front page, eyes slowly starting to blur, merging the words together.

Dan Howell, aged 18, was found crushed to death by his car in a ditch off Durham Way several months ago. After originally being labelled as a fatal accident, police have now discovered new evidence suggesting possible suicide. At this point things are still uncertain. "All I want is closure," his mother stated recently. "I want to be able to move on from this." There is little reason yet known as to why Howell would commit suicide, however...

Phil slammed the newspaper face-down in the rack, blinking back tears. He sucked in a shaky breath. Crushed to death by his car...But – Phil had seen him a few days ago. No, he'd spoken to him, laughed with him, loved him for months. It was impossible for him to be dead. This had to be someone else, it couldn't be anything but a big coincidence. There was no way Dan had died, not when Phil had kissed him and held his hand and taken him to formal. Not when he'd seen him grin, listened to his breathing.

Phil couldn't understand. He shoved away from the rack and stumbled down the sidewalk. He couldn't breathe. The rope had tightened around his lungs. Feet carrying him somewhere he didn't know, men and women passing him by without so much as a glance, wind pushing back his hair and chilling the tears on his cheeks.

He couldn't think. He didn't want to think anymore. All he wanted silence, relief, an ending to this confusing story of his. He remembered the Advil in his pocket. Would 10 be enough? Was it painful? He didn't care. He had to reach his hideout.

But then someone came into view up ahead – no, a group of people – and Phil's world seemed to collapse.

It was Finn, surrounded by his friends. Before Phil could even register them properly the boy's eyes had landed upon him and the group was moving towards him. Menacing smiles twisted their faces and Phil couldn't move. No, not now, why now?

He tried to run, but it was too late. Alfie and Joe had vice-like grips on his arms and they were dragging him forward into a thin alleyway between two buildings. Finn and the rest of them followed. Phil struggled against their hold, trying to regain control over his broken breaths. No, no, no, they couldn't be here, this couldn't still be happening...

The two boys shoved him violently against the cold ground and pain bored into his back like daggers, making Phil cry out. He tried to push himself up with trembling hands but someone pushed him down again.

"There, we found him," a voice snapped. "Go on then, Finn. Show us you aren't a dirty faggot like this one."

Reluctantly Phil raised his head and his eyes met Finn's as the boy loomed above him, casting a shadow over him. For a split second remorse seemed to flash across Finn's eyes but suddenly it was gone. All that remained was cold, hard malevolence and Phil couldn't register a thought before a boot buried deep into his ribs and pain blossomed fresh and sharp.

And if anyone heard his cries, they didn't come to his aid.

#highschool!phan #teenage!phan #plantboy!phil #spaceboy!dan #angel!dan #phan au #phan fluff #phan angst #chaptered #dan and phil

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