#everything in me was just sadness…my tears hurt and I just couldn’t continue reading

[this-blog-needs-a-new-name]

I don’t know nor wanna know how this fits into the wedding AU but if you are one that loves your heart to be broken, stepped on and literally tear apart… this one’s for you 💀

[temporarily-your-saint]

Dull Blades

benjicot blackwood & targaryen oc

UPDATED! First chunk of this just? Disappeared??? So, edited it to include the missing first part!

warnings: angst?? no warnings, really? fluff & drabble for now & soft ben ~

I got this idea for a drabble from S2 of GOT when Catelyn Stark finds her son in disarray after hearing of his father. After watching the last couple episodes of HOTD (and reading Fire and Blood recently), it’s hard not to think about all of the heartbreak between the two sides. This little drabble follows an OC I’m creating, Rhaenala, having a moment to really feel and let out her frustration and sadness. She wanders off to the woods on her own once settling into the Riverlands only to then be discovered by a certain Blackwood. Also, I know, I know, okay! I know our boy didn’t turn out to be our boy, BUT LET ME COPE, OKAY. : ‘ )

Also, part 1??? Thinking about making a second part to this…

—

Swing after swing the blade got duller and even more damaged. The log had had it. She couldn’t help it though. Everything was falling apart as she knew it. Her house, her family, everything. It wasn’t fair. None of it was fair.

Her breath heaved as she swung her sword. In the distance, she could hear footsteps brushing along the grass and leather moving against each other as a voice called out.

She wiped her eyes, removing all evidence of frustrated tears.

“Hey!” She heard the voice as it got closer. It was a husky voice, perhaps a young lad.

“Hey! Princess!” Lilac eyes snapped up to meet the unknown voice. Her chest rose up and down quickly as she leaned over to rest. Who was this? This lanky, dark-haired man? Rhaelana was stunned by his boldness yet captivated.

Piercing familiar eyes met hers. “We need that sword, Princess. We need every sword necessary to end every life that defends the usurper. And…” he trailed off, his eyes scanning the blade in her hands. “You’re letting that one go to waste,” he finished his sentence softly as he slowly approached closer.

Blackwood. Benjicot Blackwood.

She remembered now. Head of House Blackwood. How could she be so dense?

The princess was sent by her mother to aid their allies with the battle against the Lannister army. Benjicot had sent ravens to the queen not long before asking for aid, so Rhaelana was drafted with Valax, her grown dragon with black onyx scales. The two were a formidable pair and more than capable of assisting their Riverland allies.

Her mouth parted with a bewildered cackle, laughing uncontrollably out loud. She couldn’t help it. This truly was a sightly scene for the young lord to find his princess, wasn’t it?

She sheathed the sword as she stood upright. “My apologies, my lord. I shall be more mindful,” her voice quivered on the last word, almost making her lose her composure. He could see that, of course. It wasn’t difficult to see that she was hurting, being torn apart in every direction. Most of all, she was grieving. Grieving for those that were already lost. Grieving for those that would welcome death soon enough. And what better way to let go than by hitting something? Oh, Benjicot knew that feeling all too well.

“Princess?” He continued to walk towards her, stepping slowly only inches apart now as they stood in front of each other.

“I should be going now. There’s people expecting me and—“ But as she began to step past him, an arm reached out, hand wrapping itself around her wrist.

“I wept,” he began to speak, answering the puzzled look on the princess’s face. “The first time I lay eyes on all the bodies. It was my first time on a battlefield and afterward I felt nothing but sorrow.” His words hung heavy in the air. “War is war, princess. And with family? I dare not imagine. But you have us. You have me,” he spoke softly while searching her eyes.

The young lord realized he still held her wrist and released her, snapping the princess harshly back into reality as he let her go.

“Benjicot Blackwood,” she spoke his name sternly. The young man straightened up, gaze never faltering hers.

“Thank you. I hope to see you at the meeting,” a hopeful gleam shined in her eyes as she spoke. Her body then glided past him, her shoulder brushing his arm as she passed.

The current state of her family was doomed. But her mother’s rightful place on the throne didn’t have to be. No, she was going to fight. She was going to fight with any and every weapon possible, dull or not.

A smile danced at the corner of the young lord’s lips as she passed by. His head bowed for a moment as he responded, “Of course, princess.”

Her figure walked away from him, towards the direction of camp. If there was one thing for certain, Ben knew they’d succeed with the princess at their aid. He recognized the look in her eyes all too well. The princess was proving to be all the more captivating than he could have hoped.

[yanderenightmare]

can we have more yan DEKU who terrorises his exgirlfriend? like, he sends her creepy letters and gifts, without mentioning it's him of course, scaring her straight back into his arms??

Deku - Midoriya Izuku

TW: yandere, hints of dubcon/noncon, size difference, stalker, mental abuse

Green Paisley

You’d felt watched lately, and things were rarely where you remembered putting them. But thinking it was all in your head, you’d ignored it until you received the first gifts and saw the pictures. Eyes peeled while reading the letter with a shaky hand covering your mouth, you dropped everything on the steps to your apartment when quickly reaching for your phone.

I wasn’t going to write you any letters. I was happy just watching because I knew you were already spoken for. But I’ve noticed that the green-haired guy hasn’t come over lately, and I feel so sad knowing you’re home all alone…

You contact the police, but all they tell you is to invest in a new alarm system. After a little crying at the station, they show you enough sympathy to post a squad car in your neighborhood – but all in all, you’d say they didn’t seem very convinced.

That green-haired guy is a fucking moron. If you were mine, I would never let you go. I would take care of you, much better than he ever could. I would give you only the prettiest gifts and call you only the sweetest names. I’d treat you how someone like you deserves to be treated. Keep you safe and sound and happy to be mine…

You read the stalker’s letter again while browsing ways to upgrade your security – your thumb in your mouth, nail bending where you chewed on it – eyes panning over the photos that came in the box. Taken through the window – some innocent enough, candid pictures of you cooking in the kitchen or watching a movie on the couch. 

Others were not so innocent.

Your nail broke between your teeth as you looked at the revealing pics of you in your bedroom – wearing nothing but flimsy underwear. 

You looked back to the screen and continued scrolling through deals – but more than that, you were trying to distract yourself from what you really wanted to do…

Izuku had always been a source of comfort when it came to safety, and you know he’d come if you called, but since you broke up with him only a couple of months ago it seemed too selfish to ask. Besides, the reasons you broke things off were all because of his derogatory tendencies, and to beg him over because of something like this would only prove his point.

You couldn’t call him over. He’d see it as a win, and you’d decided you wouldn’t lose to his patronizing ways any longer. You needed to do this on your own – without his help.

You had to wait through the weekend until Monday to call a guy. A new box came both days, each one more terrifying than the last. But after installing a new alarm system you felt a little safer.

But the next box stripped that safety away.

I know I must be creeping you out. After all, you have no idea who I am, whereas I know you so intimately. But you shouldn’t feel scared. I would never hurt you. My gift to you today is proof of that.

P.S. Security systems aren’t enough to keep me away from you. 

Beneath the letters were more pictures of you – this time sleeping – inside the house. 

You fell apart – caving in, calling Izuku in tears, begging him to come over in a hurry. “Izu- please, please, please come home-”

He’s sitting on your couch only a curt fifteen minutes later, a tight arm around your midriff, holding you close for comfort while you sobbed against his chest – a furl deepened his brows while reading, holding your stalker’s letters in the other hand with green eyes narrowing for every sentence he finished.

I dream of making you mine. As I watch you sleep, I wonder what you dream of. You look so lonely lying there. Maybe if I keep you company, you’ll start dreaming of me too.

“How many of these have you received?” He questioned when done, looking around at the gift wrap on the floor, green-paisley-patterned, and the several boxes filled with crepe and untouched pieces of what looked like different arrangements of lingerie, candy, and sex toys.

“Four, I think…” You muffled against his tear-soaked shirt, clinging to him with your legs tucked onto his lap.

“Four? Why didn’t you call me sooner?” He echoed, looking down at you with heavy curls shadowing his eyes.

You looked up at him through the blur, lip sucked between your teeth before answering. “I- I went to the police-”

“The police? You went to the police instead of calling me?” He cut you off harshly, making you flinch.

“I-I-” You stuttered, crying, and he shook from his misplaced anger and took your face in his palms.

“Shh-sh- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you.” He apologized with a kiss on your forehead before pulling you close to his chest again. “It’s just… this is exactly what I warned you about. You should have called me sooner.”

“I’m sorry.” You whimper, calming down to the warm strokes his large hand smoothed across your back.

“Shh- it's okay… I’m here now… and I'm not gonna let any sicko touch you. I promise.” He soothed – his voice a calm and strong anchor for you to grip onto. “Come, I’ll help you pack a bag. You’ll sleep at my place tonight.”

“Okay…” You sniffle. “Thank you.”

He drove with only one hand on the steering wheel, the other on your lap, holding your hand – your bag by your feet – and you’re reminded of the first days you started dating. Sleepovers and overnight bags – his hand between your thighs on the drive.

His new place is bigger than the last – like something out of a magazine. Modern and simplistic – a little too clean, maybe, but very stylish. 

You knew he’d been climbing the ranks a couple of spots a week since you broke up with him, but you hadn’t known the new paychecks could afford something like this. It made you feel a little guilty thinking about it, then a little embarrassed, causing you to flush – standing there in guest slippers, bag in hand – your presence sticking out like a sore thumb.

“You hungry?” He asked, shaking you out of your meekness, where you looked up with a small nod and a slight hum.

He smiled, turning to the kitchen. You were so cute.

At dinner, it almost feels like old times. Izuku plays with your legs under the table even though you give him a look. He gets you to giggle after a while, surrendering to his hopeless flirting. You help him carry the dishes after you’ve finished – and even though he has a washer now, you slip right into that old routine and start filling the sink with warm water and soap. And then you stand there, the two of you – shoulder to elbow, and your chest flutters, wondering if he was always that tall.

You blushed and ducked your head, not wanting him to see you getting so flustered. You pretended to be throwing some scraps in the trash and that's when your eyes caught hold of it.

Green paisley.

You’re stunned for a moment. Still crouched down, your head hovering over the trash – face blank, body still.

“You weren’t meant to see that.” Came a voice.

Izuku stood next to you. Washcloth in hand, dripping soapsuds on the floor.

You’re breath shivers in your throat, and you drop to the ground with a gulp, looking up at him – now with building fear accenting your still shocked expression.

You blink a couple of times, trying to make sense of it but getting nowhere. “W-why?” Left you then, along with sudden tears that started slipping down your cheeks.

And it really was the only question you had. Why would he do this? Why would he torment you like that? Why would he-

“’Cause you left… And I needed a way to get you back.”

You cringed. Feeling sick – almost sick enough to turn around and throw up the entire dinner in the trashcan, all over that stupid green paisley print. But you didn’t. “You’re pathetic.” – is what you said instead.

You got up from the floor. Upset tears still rolled down your face, but you were mostly just pissed – kicking off your guest slippers, you sat down atop the shoe bench and started doing your laces.

“I’m leaving. Don’t call me. If I ever see you near my place, I’m calling the cops.” You uttered, grabbing your bag before yanking the door handle.

It didn’t budge – some strange new type of locking mechanism, which really made no sense to have on the inside.

“I’m going home, Izuku. Unlock the door.” You huffed, turning around to look at him sourly, only he’d approached you all too silently – making you gasp to see him standing right behind you.

“You’re not going anywhere…”

You’re taken to the bed, kicking and screaming – then pinned by hands thrice the size of your own beneath the big-boned body they belonged to. And now you’re really feeling scared.

Before, it had been such a distant threat – something you could pretend wasn’t there for most of the day and otherwise deal with by the soothing presence of a weapon in your house or a quick phone call to the police. But now – there was no comfort to be found anywhere.

“Shh, baby~ don’t fuss. It’s better this way.” He tried soothing, holding your fighting wrists tightly above your head in one fist. The other kept your lips shut, muffling all screams. Barring your thrashing legs beneath his own. “You need me- you couldn’t even last a single week without calling me.” He justified, hunched over you with his mouth only an inch above the knuckles draping your mouth. “But that’s alright, I don’t mind it. I always planned on taking care of you.” He cooed, rubbing his nose sweetly against yours despite you trying to shake away from it. 

You felt something rub against your thigh, and you knew all too well what it was. Fat tears streamed down your cheeks, facing the next events.

But Izuku shared none of your discomforts, rocking the bump against you with a moan slipping into his rant. “You like the new place I got, don’t you? You can stay in all day- I’d give you all you’d ever need or want- you’d be so comfortable you wouldn’t ever even want to leave-”

He sounded just like the letters.

And where it had ached you to know that he’d been the one to write them all… now it terrified you to understand how he’d meant every last word of it, too.

[yeonzzzn]

for astra: park sunghoon

part two of for astra | spotify playlist

pairing: sunghoon x afab!reader word count: 2.4k

synopsis: sunghoon finds himself waking up and repeating the same day over and over again until he finally breaks the cycle and finds himself on a space station called ‘astra 1’. he soon learns he is one of the few who are still alive and that they aren’t alone…

genre: space!au, survival!au, neurologist!sunghoon, neurologist!reader, strangers to lovers, angst, smut.

warnings: swearing, blood, m*rder, guns go pew pew, other life forms, some science talk, unprotected sex, biting, hair pulling, sunghoon fucks reader against the wall, adding more as the story progresses, MINORS DNI!!! (these tags will be on every part even if they do not consist of said tag)

intro | part one | part two

this is part TWO for the series, please read the INTRO and part ONE before this part!!💜

Sunghoon opened his eyes. The first thing he saw was his reflection with the infinite space staring back at him through the windows. Everything felt fuzzy as his eyes and brain adjusted. He blinked a few times and tried to move, eyes whipping down to his wrists and seeing them bound to the chair he was locked in. 

He tried to kick his legs, finding they too, were bound to this chair. 

Sunghoon’s heart raced as he thrashed around in the chair, trying hard to break free. His eyes wander around the…lab? He was in a lab. Neuromods sat on the counter to his left along with testing beakers of what looked like the Typhon’s blood. X-rays hung above the counter that he could only assume were his. He continued to thrash around in the chair, taking notice he had IVs also hooked in his right arm at the crease of his elbow and the sound of a machine buzzing as his left arm was squeezed, assuming for taking his blood pressure. 

“What the fuck…” he whispers, continuing to try and pull his arms free. 

“I wouldn’t continue that if I were you,” the voice startled him, his head whipping to his right and seeing another male, their back facing him and typing away at the computer in front of him, “You need to keep that IV in.” 

That voice…

It couldn’t be…

The male turned around, leaning against the desk and crossing his arms over his chest, that ring placed directly on his middle finger. 

Sunghoon was staring back at himself. 

“What the fuck!!!” he yelled, trying to force his wrists from the restraints, them digging into his skin and a mixture of red and black blood dripping from the top of his wrist. 

“I’m going to need you to calm down,” The other Sunghoon said with an eye roll, “You and I are the same person, there’s no need to be acting a fool.” 

Is this how it felt to be employed by him? 

“I died!” Sunghoon snapped, shaking his head, “Where the fuck am I?! Who the fuck are you?!” 

The male sighed, looking down at the floor. A white ball floated up to Sunghoon just then, tilted to its side. He couldn’t explain it, but he felt the sadness radiating off this small little ball. 

“Nov!” he cried, pulling once again at his restraints, “Get me out of here!” 

The ball turned and looked at the other him, another sigh leaving his lips. 

“That’s not November,” The male said, tucking his bottom lip between his teeth. 

Sunghoon glanced back and forth between himself(?) and the bot. He felt betrayed. 

“Been a while, hasn’t it?” the bot spoke. Sunghoon’s eyes widened.

“He-Heeseung?” his voice was barely above a whisper, tears swelling his eyes. 

Heeseung floated closer to him, “Everything is okay,” he said, a hint of hurt behind his voice, “We’ll explain everything.” 

“You’re dead,” Sunghoon shook his head, “I saw the videos! I saw how that phantom took over your body! I saw it in the trauma center!” 

“Just…” his best friend backed away, tilting himself to the side, “Just let us explain.” 

Sunghoon looked back at himself, “Fucking explain what the fuck is going on!!” 

The other male sighed again, giving a painful expression, “What you just experienced was a mixture of my past memories and a simulation.” 

Sunghoon furrowed his brows, “That’s not possible,” he shook his head, “That’s not possible!!” 

The other male tilted his head, “So were the neuromods,” his eyes glanced at the few sitting on the counter, “And we made it happen. You saw it firsthand in the simulation.” 

Sunghoon looked down at the floor, squeezing his hands into fists, “How are the two of us?” 

Heeseung sighs, “The same way I am in this bot, psyche transfer.” 

So his best friend was still dead. His mind was just backed up into a fucking neuromod and shoved into a fucking ball. Sunghoon could feel his heart ripping. 

But does that mean…?

Sunghoon quickly shot his head back up and looked at the man standing at his side, seeing the same pained expression looking back at him, “I’m a copy, aren’t I?” 

The real him nodded, “You are part of my psyche that I transferred into a phantom. Our psyche is so strong, you took over the phantom’s body,” The real him walked across the lab, fidgeting with the neuromods, “She was one hell of a neurologist, wasn’t she? Couldn’t have made any of this possible without her.” 

You. The way other Sunghoon spoke…you were truly gone. 

Sunghoon watched as the real him went back to the computer, typing a few things in, then turned back around to face him. Sunghoon studied his own features, seeing the real him hadn’t slept for who knew how long. 

Sunghoon looked back to the floor, “Why did you do this? How do I even look human?” 

Heeseung moved closer to him, “Since your psyche was so strong and took over the phantom, your body morphed into a human state, completely taking over in every aspect.” 

It made sense. Sunghoon always knew he was strong-willed, and he guessed this body was living proof of that. 

“Why are you doing this, Sunghoon?” he asked the real him, glaring up at him, “Why did you put me through hell?!” 

The real him swallowed, eyes swelling and clearly looked like he was fighting against his own demons deep within, “To save her.” 

He didn’t even need to ask who he meant. He shared a heart and mind with the man across from him anyway, “How?” it was all Sunghoon could ask.

“These simulations,” the male said, running his hand through his hair, “Of making you relive our memories in hopes of finding a way to save her. To gather more pieces of her psyche through us.” he pointed his finger between the copy and real him, “If I can gather enough of her psyche, I can upload it into a neuromod and bring her back.” 

Sunghoon scoffed, “Simulations. Plural. Mean’s you’ve put me through this multiple times?” 

The other Sunghoon nodded, “And each time you reach the end, I am a step closer to bringing her back.” 

Sunghoon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Couldn’t comprehend what he was even being told. He’s a phantom? He’s relived watching you die over and over again? It’s no different than what those damned scientists put him through. 

He looked over at Heeseung then back at his real self, “Heeseung is dead, how did you get his psyche?” 

“He…he killed the phantom that took over me,” Heeseung quickly said, “And stripped out the neuromods I planted into myself.” Sunghoon didn’t need to hear the rest to understand what the real him did next. Probably separated the phantom and Heeseung’s psyches and then uploaded them into the bot. 

“One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do…killing my best friend to free him from that creature.” the male mumbled, looking off into the infinite space, “The hardest thing for sure, is the fact I couldn’t save YN. I wasn’t strong enough to pull her back into the station.” 

He had a realization then, “After that panel closed you escaped to the shuttle bay, like she told us to.” 

He nodded, “Ran as quickly as I could. November followed behind me and reminded me about the ship that had a lab, which is where we are now. I knew then what I had to do.” 

And the rest is history, I guess. 

The real Sunghoon glanced back at him, releasing a sigh, “Heeseung, prepare for the next run.” 

The next run? 

Sunghoon shook his head, “What do you mean, the next run?!” 

“I will continue to put you through the simulations until I’ve gathered enough of her,” he turned back around and typed at the keyboard, “I will bring her back.” 

Sunghoon started thrashing around again in the chair trying to get free. He couldn’t do this. Not again. He knew exactly what had to be done for the simulation to even work. He can’t do it. Refused. 

Heeseung hovered over Sunghoon, a small mechanical arm extending out of his body that came to three prongs at the end. 

No. No. No. No. 

He closed his eyes and slammed his head into the headrest, squeezing them so tight and rocking his head side to side, “No!!”

“Sunghoon,” Heeseung said, “Look at me, please.” 

He didn’t understand why, but hearing his best friend's voice…he slowly reopened his eyes. He didn’t see Heeseung, but saw multiple paper butterflies hanging from the ceiling, “Butterflies…” 

The other male looked up as well, a weak smile curled at his lips, “YN loved them,” he let out a small laugh, “She used to make these paper ones and left them all over Astra 1 for me, Jake, and Hee to find. It was a silly game of hers and I’d give anything to play it again.” He then turned and looked at him, “That’s why every time you saw a butterfly in the simulation you’d black out. It was our psyche fighting back the trauma of losing her.” 

It made sense, all of it did. Seeing the inkblot butterflies, seeing your face for the first time…Sunghoon’s eyes teared up as he looked at each butterfly. Small pieces of you are still kept alive through them. 

The real Sunghoon clenched his fists at his side, “I miss her, so fucking much,” his voice cracked with pain, and his body started to shake, “I can’t…I can’t live without her,” he smiled weakly again, rubbing the back of his hands against his eyes, “I remember meeting her like it was yesterday. We hired her based on her background. It was so impressive,” he crossed his arms over his chest, staring at the floor, “Hired her immediately. It wasn’t even a question. I didn’t fully meet her until Astra 1 was put into space. Heeseung promoted her to being the head neurologist beside him and me, of course, to help run the neuromod division and transferring of the psyche. Jake was also so impressive, it was a no-brainer why YN and him were best friends, both were so smart.” he smiled again, “Jake was obsessed with slasher films. Even created a ghost face mask out of printer paper and stole a couple of black table clothes to make a ghost face suit. The man was a nerd, but I loved him too, nevertheless.” He took a deep breath in, “YN and I always just passed each other in the hallways and barely said a word to each other when I would visit their division to check up on the neuromod progression. Always made small smiles and stole glances at each other. The attraction was there and only a matter of time before something really sparked between us both.” 

Sunghoon could feel his heart really starting to break now, hearing the way his other self spoke about you and how shakey his voice was…

“I knew I loved her the minute I saw her really smile for the first time. It was the same day she and Jake perfected the neuromods, or well, proved that it could be done. They just had a first successful trial run. And good god the way she smiled…She owned my heart then and there. Heeseung had to convince me for days to ask her out, and when I did…I couldn’t let her go after that. She became my reason for everything,” Real Sunghoon changed his facial expression to soft and sad, to hard and eager, “So I will do whatever it takes to bring her back. I don’t care how many simulations you’ll need to go through. I will continue to wipe your memory of it and shove you back in over and over again.” 

Tears now filled and fell down his face, shaking his head back and forth and started fidgeting again in the chair, pulling and licking his legs to break the restraints, “No!” he shouted, “I can’t do it!! I can’t watch her die again!” The tears flooded out now, his vision going blurry, “I promised!” he screamed, “I told her I wouldn’t forget her ever again! I told her I wouldn’t forget! I promised!” 

The real Sunghoon knelt down in front of him, cupping the sides of his face between his hands, “Shhhh,” he whispered, his own eyes filling with tears, “This needs to happen, so she can live again.” 

Sunghoon shook his head the best he could between the hands, “I love her…I can’t do it again…not again.” 

The real him gave him a sad look and then said, “Heeseung, hand me the serum so I can inject him with some and knock his ass out.” Sunghoon shook his head, seeing out of the corner of his eye, another small arm extending out of the other side of Heeseung’s bot body and reaching on the counter to grab a syringe and hand it to the real him, “I truly am sorry,” he cleared his throat and stuck the needle into the IV connected to his arm, “But I will save YN. She will be with me again.” 

Sunghoon felt himself relax, his vision slowly starting to blur. He studied his face, seeing there was no way of talking himself out of this decision. That the real him has completely lost himself, all in the name of love. All for you. 

He blinked a couple of times, trying to fight back the drowsiness but knowing he was going to fail anyway. The last thing he saw was the real Sunghoon walking away, and looking at his reflection in the window, seeing dark purple eyes staring right back at him. 

Heeseung hovered back over him, the three prongs leveling to his right eye. His vision completely blurred, and his hearing faded in and out, he heard Sunghoon say, “Reupload project Astra.” 

Then everything went dark. 

[ 𝙻𝙾𝙰𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶… ]

[ … ]

[ … ]

[ … ]

[ 𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙿𝙰𝚂𝚂𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙳 ]

[ ****** ] 

[ … ]

[ 𝚆𝙴𝙻𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙱𝙰𝙲𝙺, 𝚂𝚄𝙽𝙶𝙷𝙾𝙾𝙽 ]

[ 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙳𝙾? ]

[ 𝘾𝙊𝙈𝙈𝙀𝙉𝘾𝙀 𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙅𝙀𝘾𝙏 𝘼𝙎𝙏𝙍𝘼 ]

[ 𝙻𝙾𝙰𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶… ]

[ … ]

[ … ]

[ 𝖴𝖯𝖫𝖮𝖠𝖣 𝖯𝖱𝖮𝖩𝖤𝖢𝖳 𝖠𝖲𝖳𝖱𝖠? ]

[ 𝙔𝙀𝙎 ]

[ //𝖴𝖯𝖫𝖮𝖠𝖣𝖨𝖭𝖦… ]

[ 𝖴𝖯𝖫𝖮𝖠𝖣𝖤𝖣 ] 

[ 𝖯𝖱𝖤𝖲𝖲 𝖤𝖭𝖳𝖤𝖱 𝖳𝖮 𝖲𝖳𝖠𝖱𝖳 ]

[ 𝙀𝙉𝙏𝙀𝙍 ]

Sunghoon’s eyes fluttered open, wandering them to the glass sliding door leading out to his balcony. The morning sun shone brightly into his studio apartment. With a sigh, he pulled himself out of bed, dragging his feet across the floor towards the bathroom. Stretching out his arms and letting a small yawn leave his lips. 

He really didn’t want to go to work today.

—

thank you so much for everyone who has followed along with this series!! even tho it was short, I enjoyed every moment writing this and I hope everyone enjoyed reading it as well. thank you again for everyone’s undying support of my works!! much love!!!

intro | part one | part two

— perm. tlist: @alvojake @ikeuverse @woniebae @shawnyle @jwnghyuns

@in-somnias-world @zyvlxqht @aaa-sia @wonniethepoo @addictedtohobi

@eneiyri @skzenhalove @fakeuwus @cherry-park @vousty

@ladyartemesia @criminalyun @cmoundiamante @enhaverse713586 @wondipity

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@vveebee @teddybeartaetae @kookify @abysofsteel @aileeeeeeeeeeeee

@hee-lvrr @1309zip @moon0fthenight

[spid3namy]

— COMFORT

pairing : e!42 miles x mixed!female reader

summary : miles had a bad day so you comfort him in the best ways you know how

contains : angst , fluff , cussing , head kisses

word count : 867

notes : i was just like bored and just thinking cus ya know, why not? i thought of this and felt like it was good so then this was made 😍 

Miles wasn’t one to make a big deal out of something that was so small.

He wasn’t one to talk about his feelings. And he definitely is not the type to cry in front of anyone. So why did he break so easily around you? Why was it that every time you asked him something, he would tell you? Maybe it was because he knew how worried you got. 

Either way, he hated the power you held over him. He hated how easy it was for you to see past his tough exterior. 

He was so hard to read in the eyes of everyone else. But not you. You always knew how to tell if he was upset over something. It made him feel weak. He was your boyfriend, he was so supposed to be strong for you. Yet, he was weak and he knew you knew it. It sucked.

~

“Hey, boo. Snap out of it”

Your fingers snapping in front of his face is what caused Miles to pull himself out of his thoughts. He blinked and looked over at you, a faint smile on his face as he looked at you. He didn’t know what happened. All he knew is that he was apparently crying. 

“What’s wrong, Miles?”

Miles shook his head and wiped at his eyes, feeling that crushing feeling in his chest again. This happened a lot. That vulnerable feeling caused this weird crushing feeling to fill up his chest. 

He hated it.

You give him a look. One he knew very well. Miles merely shrugged and moved his attention away from you. Miles stared at everything but you. He knew you were gonna get the truth eventually. You always did.

“Miles, love.. Look at me”

You gently grab his chin and turn his head towards you, pretty much forcing him to look at you. Miles looked at you with sad eyes, there was clearly something wrong.

“Bad day?”

Miles merely nodded and averted his eyes away from yours. You hum and soon let go of his chin before you move closer to him on the couch, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. 

“That’s okay..”

Miles allowed his shoulders to slump and his eyes to stay away from you. He was less tense than earlier. That was a good sign at least. He still wasn’t talking though but you already knew he just needed some time before he spoke to you. 

“It hurts, ma..”

Miles’ voice is low and soft, the sound causing your heart to ache. You nod your head and hum lightly, your fingers playing with the ends of his braids gently. You two sit in silence for what seems like forever. And it did feel like forever. 

“You put too much pressure on yourself, boo.”

Miles shook his head at your words and let out a sigh, his eyes staring down at his hands. And before he knew it, his eyes were welling up with tears and he was crying. Why was he crying? He had no idea. All he knew was that the tears were running down his face and he couldn’t stop them.

You pulled him closer and allowed your arms to wrap around his frame, rubbing his back gently as he sobbed onto your shoulder. You didn’t care how wet your shirt was getting or all the snot that was definitely gonna be on your shirt, you were too focused on him. And how much you wanted Miles to be okay. 

“I ... I fuckin’ hate how you make me feel, ma.”

“How do I make you feel?”

“You make me feel so fuckin’ weak all the damn time.”

You merely hum in response, not even fazed by his words. It wasn’t like you really could change that. It was just impossible for you to change how he felt so you would just have to deal with it. Not that you really thought it was a bad thing. 

Miles continued to cry on your shoulder, his arms wrapped around your waist and holding you tightly. It was almost like he was scared that you were gonna disappear if he let go of you. And he didn’t want that to happen. 

“Shh.. it’s okay, my love. You’re okay..”

Miles broke at the sound of your voice, a choked out sob coming from him and his gripping tightening on your slightly. He could feel his body shake when you pressed a kiss onto his forehead. 

He didn’t understand why he was crying so hard but he did know that he was happy that you were allowing him to cry on your shoulder like this. His tears and snot were soaking your shirt but you didn’t seem to care, something he found very sweet. 

He knew being vulnerable with you wasn’t really a bad thing. He hated being weak in front of you though. Hated how it made him feel. Hated how he thought that you would hate him when you see him being vulnerable. 

But now, in this moment, he didn’t care. He felt safe enough with you to cry all his stress out in front of you and he was thankful that you made him feel so damn safe.

[pyrodolls]

clean (sub zero, scorpion x reader)

warnings: self harm, slight angst to comfort

pairings: bi-han and kuai liang x gn reader (separate)

a/n: this is a bit self indulgent, i am now 10 months clean as of today. i usually don’t write kuai liang, but i thought he’d be one of the most comforting characters to have by your side. i hope this can provide some comfort to those struggling.

(please read the warning before you continue.)

bi-han walked into your bedroom and saw you looking down at your old wounds. they looked to be self-inflicted, as they were all faded straight lines covering your arms.

bi-han is no stranger to scars. as the grandmaster of the lin kuei, he has grown used to the injuries he gains in kombat.

but he was not aware you had scars of your own. especially self-inflicted ones.

“beloved?”

you quickly hid your arms as soon as you heard your boyfriend’s voice.

“good evening, bi-han. how are you?” you asked, pretending he saw nothing.

he went up to you and gently grabbed your arm, taking a closer look at your scars.

“what is this…?” he asked. he already knew the answer, but he hoped he was wrong.

you went quiet. there was an uncomfortable silence between you two, as the only sounds you could hear were his deep breaths and the wind blowing outside.

“a few months ago…” you took a deep breath, preparing for the worst. “i… wasn’t doing very well. so i resorted to the only thing i thought i deserved. i felt like such an idiot at the time. i was making so many mistakes, so i just decided to give myself a… punishment. i haven’t done it since, i swear-”

your boyfriend interrupted you by pulling you in for a hug. he knew you were most likely better now. but would hate for you to think he doesn’t care about your feelings.

“if you ever feel that way again, please let me know.” bi-han whispered, holding you tight. he never cared about someone like this before. and now that he’s had a taste of what it’s like to love, he doesn’t wish to part from it.

he has also never been in your shoes, so he wants to comfort you as best as he can. but he doesn’t exactly know how to comfort someone, so he hopes he can hold you in his arms and it’ll be enough.

you are enough. he just wants you to know that. even if he has to remind you over and over. even if he ever loses his temper and you get into a fight. he would still love you. he always will. bi-han cherishes you as one of the only people that truly make him happy, so he hopes what happened to you in the past won’t have to happen again.

-

kuai liang felt sick when he saw your scars. he hoped they were old. but whether they were old or new, he should let you know that if something was going on, he would be there for you.

he wanted to tell you that immediately.

“my love..?” kuai liang called out, trying to hold back tears. he tried not to cry, knowing this was about you, not him. but he couldn’t help but feel a wave of sadness wash over him at the thought of you hurting yourself. he cared about you so much, his biggest fear was losing you.

“yes? is there something wrong?” you asked.

upon seeing you, kuai liang immediately embraced you as if he hadn’t seen you in years.

“do you understand how much i love you? i will always be here for you. at your happiest and lowest. no matter what, i will always help you when there is something wrong. even if i cannot solve the problem, you know i will do whatever i can.” he whispered, as he looked you in your eyes, the ones that he loved very dearly.

“what is this about?” you asked nervously.

“i saw your injuries…” kuai liang mumbled.

his gaze fell down to your arms. there were so many scars littered across your skin. they were faded, but that doesn’t mean they were never there.

“i just…” kuai liang sighed. “…wanted to let you know that i am always here for you, if you ever feel that way again. i am so sorry that your emotions drove you to the point of self-harm. i am not judging, but i do not it to happen again. i’ll do everything i can to prevent it.”

you were better. you had no desire to harm yourself again. sometimes the thought pops into your head every now and then, but you refuse. even though you were better, you still appreciated kuai liang’s support and determination to prevent it from ever happening again.

“it’s been 10 months.” you mumbled, sitting down against the wall.

kuai liang gave you a ‘hm?’ sound, as he sat down next to you.

“today marks 10 months since i last did it. i’m 10 months clean, kuai liang.” you explained.

“i’m proud of you. let’s make sure that number doesn’t go down, okay?” he encouraged, patting your back as a sign of support.

“yeah.. i try. i always try.” you admitted, leaning your head on his shoulder.

“i know, my love. i know.” kuai liang smiled, giving you a kiss on the forehead. he truly was proud of you. you were so strong, and he admired your honesty throughout the conversation. he understood that your past was difficult, but he believed that someone’s past does not define who they are.

even though you have been through tragedy, your existence is not a tragedy.

kuai liang accepts you wholeheartedly, and he’ll always be there to support you.

[weirdsht]

Die With A Smile - Cale/Reader

a/n: yes it's from the new lady gaga and bruno mars song. I noticed how reader always seems to be on the dying side in my fics so...

oh and I cried to the point of dehydration when I wrote this lol

tags: reader gender not specified, angst, tragedy, injuries, possibility of death, open ending

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are currently closed but my ask are still open (read pinned)

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Cale Henituse is such a selfish person. 

He continues to make unreasonable demands even when in this crucial moment.

Can’t he see the tears streaming down your face? Can’t he feel the sadness and grief overtaking your entire being?

Can’t he tell that his the reason why you’re in this state?

He probably could. His Cale Henituse after all, the ever so intelligent commander. The young master that can ensure everyone’s survival even in the direst situations.

Everyone but his.

And that’s why his so so selfish.

“Are you really telling me what to do after you’re gone?”

You cried as you felt his weak hand caress your cheeks. His hands are soft, pampered. Unlike his hands when he was Kim Rok Soo; rough and calloused. Not that it mattered much.

As long as it was him, the man you loved, it didn’t matter what his hand felt on your skin.

Cale Henituse chuckled lightly as if nothing was wrong. As if it was just a normal day in the underground villa where the two of you are lazing around.

It made you wish that Raon was here to smack some sense into him.

But alas he wasn’t. In fact, no one was around. It was just the two of you. No Raon, no Choi Han, no Eruhaben, no Rosalyn.

No way out of this damned cave.

“Stop laughing! I’m not joking!”

You couldn’t help but shout at him. You’re hands working hard to wipe every blood that comes out of his mouth, his eyes, his ears, his… 

His…

You can’t tell where the blood is coming from anymore. 

His blood-soaked hand continued to caress your cheek. Blood smearing everywhere, but you didn’t care. You can’t when you can feel his hand growing colder with each stroke.

Your lover was so selfish.

Oh so so so selfish.

“We’re both injured you dipshit.”

“You have a higher chance of survival than me. I made sure of it.”

Despite everything, he still thought of you. Yet he failed to think of what you would be if he were gone. Never considered how grey your world would become without his unprompted snarky remarks.

“Is this your payback for me dying back on Earth?”

You laid down beside him. The ground was hard as you already sacrificed every piece of clothing you both had to make Cale comfortable. Everything was quiet and peaceful. If it weren’t for the fact that both of you were injured you would have relished in it.

“Maybe… perhaps I wanted you to know how I felt that day– Agh! Fuck it hurts!”

Cale tried to joke but was cut off because his entire body shook with pain once more.

Trying to ease his pain, you held his hand. Squeezing it as you felt your own injuries hurt and throb. Both of you found solace in each other in this dark cave.

“How are your injuries? Especially the one on your side?”

The redhead inquired as he felt your hold tightened. He was probably in so much more pain than you are. But still… still, he insists on prioritizing you.

“Better than your plate could ever be.”

You omitted the part where your side is still profusely bleeding. He didn’t need another stressor when he was already one foot on death’s door.

Turning over to your side hurt, especially since you’re now crushing your wound. But you did it, just so you could stare at his face for probably the last time in this life.

“I know that it’s bleeding. I’m not dumb, lie on your back.”

Silence lingered in the cave as you said nothing. It was enough to tell Cale that you’re not gonna follow.

For what felt like hours, the two of you simply held each other’s hand. Racing to see who will give in the their injuries first.

Cale rested his forehead on yours. It felt magnetic, or maybe that was just the sticky blood. You aren’t so sure, but it felt comforting.

That was until he opened his mouth once more.

“Hey what if I pass over my ancient powers—”

“Don't you fucking dare.”

Both of you could barely speak, yet here you are still arguing.

It reminded you of all the times the two of you bickered over the smallest things.

Then it reminded you of how this was probably the last time you would be able to do so.

Cale seems to have a similar line of thoughts as he shuts up once more. A faint smile was visible on his face, probably remembering the times you spent together.

You squeezed his arm as black spots began dancing around your vision. They looked tempting, they looked like they could relieve the pain you were feeling.

But you resisted, if Cale was fighting then you’re fighting too.

“Hey…”

Cale Henituse started again after a few minutes.

“I don’t like this pain anymore…”

“You never liked pain…”

The love of your life chuckled because it was true. His chuckle was weak, almost lifeless. You tried to laugh too but couldn’t for you know the implication of those words.

Cale Henituse is reaching his limits.

And honestly, you were reaching yours too.

But you didn’t like that. You want for the both of you to live, to get out of this hellish place together.

“...I don’t like this pain anymore too.”

“See… I told you haha…”

You had no choice but to admit it. You don’t know what will happen after this. Cale said he ensured for you to have a higher chance of survival but it’s been hours. It’s a miracle none of you have dropped dead yet.

Removing your forehead from Cale’s you lifted yourself a little. It was so that you could kiss him.

Again, for possibly the last time in this lifetime.

You used the strength you didn’t have to land that one last kiss. Both of you are weak, but passion dominates the kiss. As if each of you were trying to put in the last of your vitality in this kiss. Trying to give it to the other person so they can live longer.

“I love you.”

“You’re my everything.”

Cale and you simultaneously muttered as the kiss broke. You laid back down once more to try and ease the pain that flared up over your little stunt.

Everything hurts, there’s a puddle of blood underneath the two of you, Cale was slowly losing consciousness.

But the two of you had smiles on your faces.

Because the two of you got to experience your last moments in each other's arms.

That was better than dying alone in this cold and dark cave that held you hostage.

However, tears fell from your eyes as you witnessed Cale desperately blinking to stay awake. It was finally sinking in that at least one of you might die here.

Both of you might die here.

There were still so many things the two of you didn’t do. Both of you had promised to take the children on another shopping spree next week. You promised Lock and the other wolf children that you would teach them some martial arts you learned back on Earth. Cale promised Choi Han that they would replenish the flowers in the cemetery in Harris Village.

Though that last one might turn into Choi Han having to lower flowers for both of you.

“My love… my dearest…”

You were so weak that you couldn’t continue your words. But Cale didn’t need words for he could understand you from your breath alone, and you from his.

“Don’t… cry…”

How dare he have the nerve to say that when there are tears streaming down his face too?

Cale used the very last of his strength to bring your joined hands towards his lips. It was his last act of comfort. His last act of love.

“I love… y ou… I’ll… al way s  will…”

With that Cale Henituse’s eyes closed. His hand still holding onto yours. Still pressed against his almost blue lips.

“I… I lo ve… you too…”

Then you followed suit.

As you closed your eyes you think you could hear desperate screams break the silence in the cave. Desperate and anxious screams that oddly sounded like Eruhaben. Then mixed in it are tensed orders from someone who sounded similar to Alberu.

But you didn’t have any strength left to check if you were hallucinating. So you closed you eyes and gave into the abyss waiting to comfortably embrace you.

“...CALE!”

You shouted the moment you woke up. You think you sat up but you weren’t sure. Too disoriented from your injuries and painkillers. 

You think you could feel hands trying to make you lie back down again but you weren’t sure. Even if you were, you didn’t care.

Ignoring the hands trying to subdue you, you tried to feel around for Cale. There were bandages covering your eyes, you realise just now. It seemed like you’re lying down on a bed as it felt soft.

But those weren’t the things you were looking for.

“Cale!? Where’s Cale!?”

You shouted, despair and anguish evident in your voice. There’s a bunch of textures you can feel. Lots of scents you could smell. Tons of voices you could hear.

However, none of them were Cale’s.

Not a single one of them felt like your lover’s.

[mythicalninjas]

Hello! So... I was wondering if you could make a bayverse with the turtles (separate of course) in which the reader (she) has powers like Eleven, but she never told them because she was ashamed of what her past was like. Something with a lot of angst, something like that! I'm also from Brazil, but I was embarrassed to send the message in Portuguese, haha...

Brasileiros dominam absolutamente TUDO hahahaha Seja bem-vinda! E sinta-se a vontade para falar em português ;)

💫*English ZOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM* ☀️

Hope you enjoy it 😊

Rate/Warnings: angst and a bit of fluff?

Leonardo

Leonardo had always prided himself on being able to read people. As the leader, it was his job to sense when something was wrong, when someone was hiding something. But with you, he had missed the signs, and now the revelation hung in the air like a storm about to break.

You stood before him, trembling, your eyes wide with fear—not of him, but of yourself. You had just stopped an entire car mid-air, saving him from being crushed under its weight. The sheer force of your power had left the ground cracked and the air vibrating with energy.

Leo’s swords hung loosely at his sides as he stared at you in shock, his mind racing to process what had just happened. He should have been grateful—you had saved him—but all he could think about was the secret you had kept.

"Why didn’t you tell me?" His voice was barely above a whisper, but the hurt was clear. You could see it in the way his shoulders tensed, the way his usually calm demeanor seemed to crack under the weight of the revelation.

“I didn’t want you to know,” you said, your voice thick with emotion. “I didn’t want anyone to know.”

"But why?" His brows furrowed, his tone edged with confusion and hurt. "You could’ve trusted me. You should’ve trusted me."

You shook your head, wrapping your arms around yourself, feeling small and vulnerable under his gaze. "It’s not that simple, Leo. You don’t understand. What I’ve done… what I’ve been through… it’s not something I wanted to share with anyone."

His gaze softened as he stepped closer, his hand reaching out to touch your arm, but you flinched away. The movement stung, and you saw the brief flicker of pain in his eyes.

"I’ve been ashamed of it my whole life," you continued, your voice breaking. "The things I had to do with these powers… they weren’t good. I didn’t want you to see that part of me. I didn’t want you to look at me the way you’re looking at me right now."

Leo’s face fell, and his hand dropped to his side. "I’m not judging you. I just… I don’t understand why you felt like you had to go through it alone."

"Because I am alone!" you snapped, the words spilling out before you could stop them. "No one understands what it’s like to have this… this thing inside of you. To have people hurt you because of it. To hurt others because you had no choice. I didn’t want you to hate me."

Leonardo’s eyes softened with sadness, his heart breaking at the sight of you so raw, so vulnerable. "I could never hate you," he whispered, his voice filled with sincerity. "But I need you to trust me."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you stared at him, the weight of your secret finally lifting but leaving behind the heavy scars of your past. Could he really understand? Could he still look at you the same way after everything?

"I don’t know if I can," you whispered, the pain in your voice echoing through the room.

Raphael

Raph had always prided himself on being the strong one—the protector. But seeing you like this, standing before him with your hands still trembling from the power you had unleashed, he didn’t know how to feel. His chest heaved as he tried to calm the storm of emotions that raged inside him: anger, confusion, fear.

"You wanna tell me what the hell just happened back there?" His voice was low, dangerously controlled, but you could hear the underlying hurt beneath it. He wasn’t just angry—he was scared.

You didn’t answer at first, your gaze fixed on the floor. You couldn’t bear to look at him, not after what you had done. The way you had thrown the enemy across the alley with nothing but a flick of your wrist, the way the air around you had crackled with energy. It wasn’t something you could explain easily. It wasn’t something you wanted to explain at all.

"Look at me," Raph growled, stepping closer, his hand gripping your arm, but not too hard. His touch was firm, but there was a softness there, an unspoken plea for you to say something, anything.

When you finally looked up, the pain in your eyes hit him like a punch to the gut. "I didn’t want you to know," you said, your voice barely audible over the pounding of his heart.

"Why not?" His tone softened, though frustration still laced his words. "You think I wouldn’t get it? You think I’d just… walk away?"

You shook your head, pulling away from him. "You don’t understand, Raph. I’ve hurt people with this… I’ve done things I’m not proud of. I didn’t want you to see that side of me."

Raph’s jaw tightened, his fists clenching at his sides. "I’ve hurt people too, you know," he said, his voice rough. "You think I’m proud of every fight I’ve been in? You think I haven’t done things I regret?"

"But this is different," you whispered, tears brimming in your eyes. "I’ve killed people, Raph. Not because I wanted to, but because I didn’t have a choice. And now that you know… you’ll look at me differently. You’ll see me for what I am."

His heart ached at the sound of your words. Raph had never been good with emotions, especially not the kind that made him feel helpless. But seeing you like this, broken and ashamed, stirred something deep inside him.

"I ain’t gonna walk away from you," he said after a long pause, his voice raw with emotion. "But you gotta stop pushing me away. We’re in this together, whether you like it or not."

You stared at him, unsure if you could believe him. "How can you say that? After everything I’ve done… after everything I’ve kept from you?"

Raph stepped closer, his large hands cupping your face gently, forcing you to meet his gaze. "Because I don’t care about your past. I care about you. And if that means dealin’ with some crazy-ass powers, then so be it."

For the first time in a long time, you felt a flicker of hope. Maybe… just maybe… you didn’t have to carry this burden alone.

Donatello

Donnie always prided himself on understanding things—on finding solutions to every problem. But this? This was something he hadn’t seen coming.

He stared at the destruction you had caused, the debris still settling around you. His heart pounded in his chest, the reality of what had just happened sinking in. You had powers—powers that you had kept hidden from him. The thought stung more than he cared to admit.

You stood in the middle of the chaos, your arms wrapped tightly around yourself as if trying to shrink into nothing. The guilt weighed heavily on your shoulders, and you couldn’t bring yourself to meet his eyes.

"Why didn’t you tell me?" Donnie’s voice cracked, a rare vulnerability slipping through. You’d never heard him sound like this—so lost, so betrayed.

"I was scared," you whispered, your voice barely audible.

"Scared of what? Of me?" His brow furrowed, hurt flashing in his eyes as he took a tentative step closer. "You know I would’ve helped you."

"It’s not that simple, Donnie," you replied, finally looking up at him. "You don’t know what it’s like. The things I’ve done… the things they made me do…"

Donnie’s heart clenched at your words, his mind racing to piece together what you weren’t saying. "What did they make you do?" he asked softly, though he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"I hurt people," you admitted, tears welling in your eyes. "I didn’t have a choice. They used me like some kind of weapon, and I couldn’t stop it. I didn’t want you to know… because I didn’t want you to look at me the way you’re looking at me right now."

Donnie’s breath hitched. "I’m not… I’m not judging you," he said, though the pain in his voice was evident. "But why didn’t you trust me? Why didn’t you let me in?"

"Because I couldn’t," you said, your voice trembling. "Because I didn’t want to lose you."

Donnie stood there, frozen, torn between wanting to comfort you and not knowing how to process everything you had just revealed. He had always been the one with the answers, but this time, he felt completely lost.

"I’m sorry," you whispered, your voice barely audible.

He stepped forward, gently pulling you into his arms, holding you close as you finally let the tears fall. "We’ll figure it out," he murmured, though his own doubts lingered. "We’ll figure this out together."

Michelangelo

Mikey wasn’t one for serious moments—he preferred to keep things light, to laugh and joke his way through life. But now, standing in front of you, his usually cheerful expression was gone, replaced by confusion and sadness.

You had just revealed your secret, your powers flaring up in a moment of desperation during a fight. The enemies were long gone, but the aftermath of what had happened lingered, heavy between you and Mikey.

"You have powers?" he asked, his voice quieter than you had ever heard it. The usual playful spark in his eyes was gone, replaced by confusion and a hint of sadness. “How come you never told me?”

You swallowed hard, feeling the weight of his words sink into your chest. You hadn’t expected it to come out like this—not in the middle of a fight, not with you accidentally throwing a man across the alley with nothing but a flick of your hand. You hadn’t wanted him to find out this way.

"I was scared," you admitted, your voice barely a whisper. "I didn’t want you to know because I didn’t want to lose you, Mikey."

He blinked, his brow furrowing in confusion. "Lose me? Dude, how could you ever lose me? We’re like... we’re tight, right? You coulda told me."

You let out a shaky breath, unable to meet his gaze. "It’s not that simple, Mikey. You don’t know what it’s like... to have something inside of you that you can’t control. Something that makes people look at you differently. I didn’t want you to look at me like... like a freak."

The word hit hard. Michelangelo flinched at the sound of it, as if the very idea of you thinking of yourself that way was too much for him to bear.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up," he said, stepping closer, his hands reaching out but stopping short of touching you. “Freak? Are you kiddin’ me right now? I’m the one that’s green and has a shell, remember?” He flashed a weak smile, but you could see the hurt behind it. "If anyone’s got the right to feel like a freak, it’s me, but you? You’re amazing. You saved us back there."

You shook your head, your chest tightening with guilt. "No, Mikey, you don’t get it. I didn’t always use these powers to help people. I’ve hurt people with them. I’ve done things I can’t take back. And if you knew... if you knew everything..." Your voice broke, and you had to stop, afraid you’d fall apart if you continued.

Mikey’s expression softened, and without hesitation, he took the final step closer, pulling you into a gentle hug. His arms wrapped around you protectively, as if he could shield you from all the pain of your past. "Hey, it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere. Whatever you did, whatever happened, that’s not who you are now."

You let out a shaky breath, leaning into his embrace, feeling the warmth and comfort he radiated. But the shame still lingered, heavy and suffocating. "You don’t understand, Mikey. I can’t control it. Sometimes... I feel like it controls me. What if I hurt you?"

Mikey pulled back just enough to look at you, his hands resting on your shoulders. "You won’t. I trust you. And whatever happened before, it’s in the past. What matters is who you are now. And I know the real you wouldn’t hurt me or anyone you care about."

The sincerity in his voice, the unwavering belief in you, made your heart ache. You wanted to believe him, to believe that you weren’t the monster you feared you might be. But the memories of your past, of the things you had been forced to do, haunted you.

"I don’t know how to control it," you whispered, your voice breaking. "I don’t know how to stop it."

Mikey smiled softly, brushing a tear away from your cheek with his thumb. "Then we’ll figure it out together. You’re not alone in this, okay? You’ve got me. You’ve got all of us." His voice was steady, full of warmth and reassurance, like he truly believed in every word he said.

For the first time in a long time, you felt a flicker of hope. Maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to carry this burden alone anymore. Maybe with Mikey by your side, you could learn to control the power inside you instead of letting it control you.

“Promise?” you asked, your voice small, but the hope growing in your chest.

Mikey grinned, his usual bright energy slowly returning. "Promise. We got this, dude. You and me? We’re unstoppable."

And for the first time, you believed him.

*****

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[onlymingyus]

I Hate to Admit

• pairing; lee jihoon x f reader • genre; angst • warnings; alludes to cheating in the past, arguments, tension -- no happy ending • w/c; 770 and some change  • i hate to admit - bang chan • don't listen in secret masterlist • a/n; this song is one of my favorite songs. it hits me right in the feels every single time. i was in a sad place when i wrote this, so i am sorry for that. thank you to @onlyhuis for betaing. i also hope you all don't mind a bonus posting 💕

before continuing remember reblogs are incredibly important and please read how to support me here

He took the same path every day, rarely looking up, but your voice caused Jihoon’s heart to clench and his eyes to lift today. You were talking on your phone, a pretty smile on your face. Ending your phone call, you slide the phone back into your pocket only to stop when you find the man looking at you. 

He missed you so much. He wanted to tell you that. You instantly put a smile on his face that he couldn’t hide. You made his heart beat faster, and his palms sweat. He felt warm around you as if you were the sun. 

“Jihoon…hi.” 

Your voice was quiet and timid, but that was to be expected after the fight and his avoiding your calls and texts. He didn’t want to read another text about how sorry you were when he knew it wasn’t real. 

“Hey.” 

Jihoon clears his throat, lifting his hand to run his fingers through his long hair. He knew he needed to get a haircut, but with everything going on…it had become the least of his worries. His eyes move over your face as he takes a step forward, his hands sliding into his hoodie to hind how nervous he actually was about seeing you now. 

“You look…really good, Jihoon. I–did you get any of my calls?” 

You watch as the man in front of you nods to answer your question. It made his answer sting that much more. You knew you didn’t deserve him to answer the calls or to even call you back, but it would have made things feel better. Easier? 

“I see–” 

“You look pretty, Y/N. Uh…” 

Jihoon’s words cut you off causing you to furrow your brows. He felt confused and in pain looking at you. He loved you so much and yet just looking at you hurt. He wanted to give you a second chance more than anything, but he had spent his time trying to forget. You watch Jihoon’s mouth start to open only for it to close again. 

He wanted to say something more, but you could see him processing it in front of you. In his mind, Jihoon was considering if you’d go out to coffee with him, and talk through everything that had happened. If maybe that could get you and him back to where you had been before it had all gone to shit so quickly. But as soon as the words started to form on his lips, Jihoon pushed them away knowing it was a bad idea. He hated to admit to himself that there was no saving this. 

“I hope you have a good day. I should get going. I gotta get to work.” 

Jihoon doesn’t wait for you to argue. He can see the hurt in your eyes, the way you want to try to change the past and present. He wanted to change it too, but he had spent too many nights already trying to do that. Walking past you, Jihoon doesn’t look back and you blink the tears from your lashes knowing it was what you deserved. 

With his studio door shut behind him firmly, Jihoon lets out his uneven breaths as his own tears threaten his eyes. He hated knowing that he had probably made you cry. That was one thing he had promised you while you were dating that he’d try not to do and yet he had lied. He had lied because you had lied. 

Sliding down in his chair, Jihoon blows out a deep breath before closing his eyes trying to push you from his head but instead, he can only remember more. He pictures your hand in his, your body against his, your lips meshing with his own. Fingers clench at the arms of his chair and Jihoon remembers asking you “Why, him? Why, Seokmin?” 

He remembers your eyes full of tears as you tried to think of how to lie your way out of it only to break down into apologies because you had been the one to cheat. You had cheated on him with one of his best friends. You had said you loved him and it had been a lie. 

Lifting his hand, Jihoon groans in annoyance pushing tears from his cheeks as he mutters to himself that he has to stop this. He had cried over you too many times. Every time a text came to his phone with another apology. Every time you had called him trying to tell him how much you loved him, Jihoon had cried because he loved you. 

“I gotta forget her. She's changed, just gotta let go.” 

© onlymingyus - all rights reserved. Reposting/modifying of any fic, or pieces of original writings posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations not allowed.

[filmbyjy]

COLLIE DUTY

SYNOPSIS > being the new CEO to the ‘Sim Corp’ was hard and stressful. jake didn’t have much time to spend with layla and so he decides to get a dogsitter, you. though, you were originally already his secretary. how will dog sitting bring you two closer?

ALTERNATE ENDING – yes, and?

— continuation from chapter 34 (please read if you haven’t)

you had walked out of the passenger side of the car and faced the view. you breathed in and out. jay didn’t say much, he just kept quiet and watched the view too.

“do you like jake a lot?” jay suddenly asks.

did you like jake? sure, he was everything you ever dreamt of the perfect and ideal type of boyfriend but he came with many flaws. which was normal. however, after breaking your trust and heart twice, you can’t help but feel lost…confused even.

“I don’t know.” you quietly whispered. the softness of your tone went with the beautiful scenery in front of you.

“you don’t know?” jay says in slight confusion.

“I know what my heart wants but…I can’t bring myself to physically accept him after he hurt me twice.” you explained. jay hums in acknowledgment. he understood where you were coming from and quite honestly, if he was in your position…he wouldn’t even forgive jake.

“so what are you going to do about it?”

“let him go.”

jay hums once more, “whatever you desire. you know what’s best for yourself and I’ll go along with it.”

“I don’t know what’s best for myself, honestly. I feel like I should just give up.”

“well, if your heart is telling you do so then you should. you’re someone who needs to be treated right,” jay says.

you looked up at him. “really? because I don’t feel like it. everyone that I fall in love with always leaves me in the end.”

jay shrugs, “they’re too blind to realise they’ve lost someone amazing.”

you snickered, “is this how you deal with all the ladies coming after you?”

“I don’t have anyone who likes me. My love life is kinda sad, honestly. The girl I like doesn’t like me back and all the dates I’ve gone to all just want me for my wealth and to get into my pants.” jay sighs.

“I’m so sorry.”

“it’s alright.”

“what about the girl who doesn’t like you back?”

“I would sacrifice her happiness over mine.” jay simply says as he directly looks into your eyes.

“shouldn’t you have some self-respect for yourself?”

“for her, I don’t. I want what’s best for her…even if she doesn’t like me.” jay smiles.

“whoever this girl is…she’s really unlucky. she should realise you’re the real deal.”

“yeah, she should…but I’m fine with it. As long as she’s happy with her decision.”

5 YEARS LATER…

as you looked down at your phone in the cafe that you had set up…you realise that there was something more to life. chasing after a guy who you thought was the one for you. clearly, that didn’t work out.

since, you had left Sim Corp. your life was…a little different but quite the same. you were your own little boss as you managed the cafe. when you first left Sim Corp. tons of the friends you made were reluctant to see you go. however, they understood where you came from. no one wanted to stay to face the love that wasn’t theirs.

scrolling through your gallery, you clicked on one photo. you would’ve deleted it but it would hurt you too much if you went with it. so here you were, staring at it. nearly bringing tears to your eyes. it was a photo of jake and layla. you were pathetic for still somehow having feelings for him after all these years. however, your heart just couldn’t give up on him.

everyday, you tried to live your best life. moving on and even trying to go out on dates to forget the pain that you withheld. however, it was no surprised that at the end of the date, your heart yearned for your true love. which is why…despite having a chance to possibly date jay or any other guy, you didn’t. for jay, he knows you can’t forget about jake. you thought you were stupid for still being stuck on him.

jay denies it. it just shows how much you really liked jake and quite honestly, he said if he was jake. he would be flattered. but alas, you had drifted apart from jake. never contacting him again after you left the company.

you could hear the bell to your little cafe door ringing, indicating someone had walked in.

“welcome to Lily Cafe-” the words that were supposed to continue after quickly died the moment you had laid eyes on the person who walked on.

Sim Jaeyun

he still looked as handsome as 5 years ago. you looked away and just went to the counter to attend to him as he still was a valued customer. jake stood in front of you (at the cashier) in awe. you still looked beautiful as ever. there was barely any changes to you and yet somehow, he felt like you were different.

“what would you like to have, sir.” jake swore his heart stopped. he missed your sweet voice.

“umm, it’s my first time here so what are the specials. umm any recommendations?”

“I believe the best recommendation I can give you is a simple vanilla latte and also along with the red velvet cake.”

“then can I have a cold vanilla latte and one red velvet cake?” you nodded and ringed up his order. your employees helping out to make the drink and also packing the cake into a box.

“would you like 1 fork to share with your significant other?”

“I don’t have a significant other.” he says. the air felt still, a clear tension between you two that causes your staff to start gossiping and moving over to the staff room.

“oh.”

“I divorced her a year later into our contractual marriage.” jake explains.

you didn’t know why it made you at ease and why he needed to tell you this. it was none of your business.

“alright, then I’ll just put one fork for you-” you reached to placed the fork into the bag.

“layla misses you.” jake says. you freeze. ah layla, the ever so cute puppy. she’s definitely not a puppy anymore, she would probably be an adult now. a grown dog. “I miss you.”

“there is no point of saying that. we never started anything and you got married to your childhood sweetheart.” you bitterly say.

“I already said I divorced her and I only loved you truly.”

“jake, let’s not talk about this when people are here.”

“then.” he grabs your hand (whilst also grabbing his drink and cake) “let’s go somewhere private.”

“w-what?” and so jake drags you somewhere secluded but still somewhere in public considering he didn’t want to look like some serial killer. despite him holding a cup of latte and a box of red velvet cake.

“let’s clear the air now. I love you.” jake doesn’t waste a single second.

“you can’t just say that after 5 years of me not seeing you.” you say.

“I can and I will. I love you and I want to be by your side till the very end. I never liked her, I was forced to get married because of my fucking dad. He’s the worst.”

“you don’t have to explain. there is no point.”

“what do you mean there is no point?! (name), i fucking love you. I got divorce from her because I didn’t love her, I love you and only you.”

“stop talking nonsense. you should go back.”

“there is no going back, you’re my home and my safety. I can’t leave you anymore.”

“jake.”

“please.” jake begs. it looked too pitiful. his eyes filled with tears just brimming and ready to fall. “I can’t lose you again…” his voice was shaky, this was the first time you saw jake being vulnerable.

did you want to possibly get hurt again?

yes

you were dumb enough to continue to love him.

“sim jaeyun, you asshole.” you had whacked his chest and cried in his arms. “why do you have to be so mean to me.” you sobbed out.

murmurs and apologies were just simply said to each other. once again, sim jaeyun never fails to appear into your life again. he was a virus…

a good virus.

EPILOGUE (that you guys never got)

— takes place 4 years later

MASTERLIST

a/n: finally ‘Collie Duty’ has legit and officially ended🥹 I am currently planning for ‘MineStream’ right now so look out for that whenever I upload the masterlist for it!!

taglist[closed]: @svarcq @wooonkies @ajayke-reads @peachysunooooo @xiaoderrrr @viagumi @lunakua @bubblytaetae @aureliaxuuu @nikiluvr16 @sngvhs @watermelon-sugars-things @bldelaine @enhaz1 @yeoungie @heart4hees @mimimovv @enczen @enhastolemyheart @woon2u @kyanmeai @4townn @skzenhalove @s00buwu @ce1ight @markleepooh @sparklingsjy @rizzshimura @bluxjun @beomgyusonlywife @jyndre @blamemef0rit @fanfangying1304 @kwiwin @heart4hees @luxurystark-jackson @yunjardi @ioszzn @mrowwww @bluriki @25dejulho @neoculturewhat @wtfhyuck @dianzed @143lele @ajybeo @teddywonss @nyfwyeonjun @alwayswook @shinrjj @manooffline @heavenhannie @bmnyy17 @jayujus

(bolded can’t be tagged)

[lovelyflora21]

Strangers

Summary: She was still herself, he was still him. In the same place. Yet, isn't it strange how people can change?

Pairing: Leon S Kennedy x Fem!Reader

Tags: Angst, hurt, no happy endings (?) 

A/n: A rather lengthy continuation to my previous fic, inspired by Celeste - Strange. Would recommend listening to the song whilst reading this to really get the feel of it ;)

Wc: 1,8k

P.s. Let me know if anyone wants to be added to the tag list! <3

Tag list: @lysa1201 @lysol1201

I tried for you. 

What Leon said that night, the way he looked at her with complete utter disdain; mixed with a cacophony of heavy breathing and slurred speech of spiteful, venomous words spewed her way–safe to say, it was enough to turn that tiny little voice inside her head louder. Ten times louder than the conscience, the soft spot she’s always held for him. 

That maybe everything she did for him was, in fact, all in vain. That it was a complete waste. She was wasting her precious, precious time and energy; her life, on a drunkard. An asshole of an alcoholic, once applauded for his bravery and prowess as an agent–akin to that of America’s very own zombie-killing, man-made Superman. 

God, mama was right! I should’ve dumped him. What was I thinking?!

Were what had crossed her mind as she skipped down the stairs of his apartment’s fifth floor’s stairwell. She clung onto her bag and pride, more on her pride (what was left of it anyways) than her bag really, as she rummaged through the tote bag for her car keys. She had tears welling up in her eyes, her throat burning and constricting in a measly effort of holding herself together. From sobbing her poor heart out. From breaking down on the stairs and pitying herself.

Tried to see through all the smoke and dirt. It wouldn't move.

Everything else was a blur then. The drive back home. The whole thought process on deciding to finally and completely vanishing from his life. All that in a span of minutes. Most would criticize her for being too overboard with her impulsivity, for making a big deal out of nothing! 

Oh spare me the theatrics! She could still hear Leon’s voice; nagging in the back of her mind, it would have been his reaction, if he had known of what she was about to do to him or saw an ounce more of her true reaction in response to his cruelty. 

But as she drove through the traffic and streets of DC’s avenues, her heavy-with-tears eyes dropped to see his name popping up on her phone; his number texting and calling her numerous times–his picture flashing, showing off his stupid fucking cocky grin–it silenced the other voices that were doubting her decision. And suddenly what she was about to do was justified and she saw nothing wrong with it. 

So when it turned red, she reached for her phone; looked at his number and picture one last time before she blocked it–blocked him, and shoved the phone back inside the bag. 

The first night, she couldn’t cry at all. She tossed and turned in bed then eventually fell asleep. But the next few days? Oh they were torture. Hardly sleeping, hardly eating; the blunt of the impact finally hitting her head on. Her feelings, emotions and sound mind were colliding against one another. Everything was everywhere all at once. Anger, disappointment, hurt, sadness, grief and shame. Surging all at once then fading away just as quick into numbness and denial. Then she’d crash out again, and again, and again. Rinse and repeat. 

So she did what Leon S Kennedy would’ve done. Drown herself in work, overtime after overtime. Back to back meetings, projects, RnDs. Anything to get her mind off of him and that night. One thing for sure though, she was done. 

Days turned into weeks, weeks into months. Before she knew it, she earned herself a promotion, alongside an offer to relocate somewhere else; she was given the liberty to pick the spot. To pick which branch of her office she would be relocating to. 

Without doubt and further, deeper questioning; she said yes. Again, some would have considered her impulsivity a major flaw but to be fair, this was the opportunity she had been looking for. Especially after that night and after Leon. 

Albeit the suffering and grief it brought upon her; that night brought her an epiphany. A revelation, that her whole life had revolved around him and him alone. She was never the center of her own universe, no–it had been Leon. 

It was a mistake. 

So now, with Leon gone and out of the picture; she had nothing to revolve around. There was nothing left for her here anyways…

She was never one for spirituality but it got her thinking– that the opportunity presented itself just in time. It was perfectly aligned with her, as if the universe had given her its blessings to move forward. Even without him.

As if it was a way for the universe to tell her.

He’s very dreamy, but he is not the sun. You are.

So when it was all said and done, when everything’s packed into the back of a moving truck and she’d bid farewell to friends and colleagues; she moved. Out of DC and to Francisco. 

And things were okay again. Late nights weren’t so heavy and she wasn’t so burdened with all-consuming thoughts of him. Mornings came by easier for her. She began liking the way coffee smelt, the way the flowers bloomed and the plants flourish, she began liking the taste of sourdough bread with runny eggs on top.

Casual dates were a thing for her now. Enjoying herself and her time as an individual rather than a thing attached to him. 

And before she knew it, a year had passed. 

Life was great. She was flourishing, bright and blooming. 

The sun was high above, her locks cascaded like waters down her neck. She wore a white dress, the patterns were small flowers in the color of muted salem. She had the day off, needed to pick up on groceries and flowers for her vase in the living room and kitchen island. She’d grown to fall for flowers ever since she’d moved to Francisco. 

As she was looking at the arrangement of fruits set before her, smiling at the older lady; she couldn’t help but to notice a man staring at her then approaching her. 

Hey there.

So when her eyes found him, clad in blue instead of black; they widened for a second. Taking in the phantom of what once was the man she’d loved and devoted herself to. 

They stood there, just…staring…

Then there was silence. 

Say, isn't it strange? I am still me You are still you.

—

So they sat there, across one another. This was their second meeting. In a cafe, her favorite. She’d suggested the place. They opted for the outdoor seating instead, feeling as though the walls around them were too overwhelming for her. Too suffocating, especially when she would be near him. 

Her white shirt was slightly crumpled, tucked inside her blue denim jeans that clung to her perfectly. Her bag was set by her ankle, under the table.

She crossed one leg over the other, her eyes never leaving Leon’s. Who had his own ocean blue eyes on her.

Leon had begged her for this chance. Said he wanted to talk to her, needed to talk to her. And she gave him the same grace she would’ve wanted people to give him. Less of a second chance and more towards the urge for a proper closure, really. 

Leon Scott Kennedy was never one to be curious. He’d learnt from his line of work that curiosity can and will kill the cat. And yet when it came to her, he was as curious as ever. So many things he wanted to say, to ask, to question, to find out, to know and last but never should be the least; to understand. Why did she disappear on him like that? Where has she been?Why San Francisco? How did she end up here? Is she with someone else? Is that why she was here now? Was she now a happily-married woman living the white picket fence dream?

But only one thing came out of his now slightly chapped-lips and dry mouth.

I am so sorry. 

Back to our roots What did we lose? What did we lose?

He began, stammering as he leant forward across the table that barred him from feeling her warmth. From feeling her kindness, her love, her tenderness and the familiarity of her.

It’s in the past.

Her voice was…soft. But it lacked the love and gentleness she once held for him. Her eyes were distant…as if staring at a far away dream instead of him.

I shouldn’t have said what I said, I was an alcoholic and an asshole and I didn’t deserve you.

You really didn’t. 

Then there was silence again. Leon’s breath caught as he heard her utter those simple words with such indifference it sent shivers down his spine. 

There was no malice, no anger, no bitterness lacing her words yet all the same it wounded him so. In ways he never thought nor imagined possible. 

Isn’t it strange? How people can change. 

Give me one more chance, let me make things right. 

His pleading was met with silence. Then there was a soft tapping noise against the table, Leon’s blue orbs flitted to her manicured nails for a second before coming back to her face. They were painted beige.

If I could, I’d pull your strings for one more dance.

I…I’ve changed. I’m not drinking anymore and I’ve been going to therapy and I’m not missing out on them anymore. I swear.

It was pitiful how he dragged on and on about how he was a changed man. But seeing she was not budging at all, made Leon’s stomach twist and turn. 

I can’t.

Tell me what I need to do to make this work, to make things right.

She simply shook her head, a defeated and reserved smile graced her lips. God, those same lips Leon had missed so much. How he wished he hadn’t taken her for granted. 

It’s for the best.

And with that, she gathered her bag and herself. She mustered up enough courage and willpower to heave herself up to her feet. Even outside with the wind breezing past them and the world still revolving around them, she felt just as suffocated and as still as ever. She refused to look him in the eyes, refused to study the way his face fell and his eyes glazed with tears. 

I look at you, with nothing to say.

Leaning down for one last kiss, she placed a chaste and small peck on his cheek. Feeling the stubble caress her skin and mouth. She dared not bid him farewell, nor did he. Neither lovers dared to lift their faces to meet one another’s gaze, afraid it might shatter whatever defense they had left.

Isn’t it strange? How people can change From strangers to friends Friends into lovers

So she walked away, never looking back. 

And strangers again.

[orikiys]

✿ ✿ 〞pretty little seedlings

✰ pairings: bf!seungmin x fem!reader

✰ genre: romance, angst, hurt comfort, fluff

✰ warnings: mentions of reader have a really stressful day, crying, comforting

✰ word count: 800 + words

the room was dark and dreary, with heavy, thick curtains that blocked out any sign of light. the air was thick and stale, as if the sun had never shone through that room for years. the walls were a depressing shade of grey, which only added to the gloomy atmosphere.

the bed was situated at the centre of the room, with a large, heavy canopy that blocked out any natural light. the bedsheets were a depressing shade of dull yellow, the only source of light in the room was a dim, flickering lamp that was barely enough to illuminate the darkness. underneath those bedsheets was you, huddled up and wrapped like a burrito.

the tears threaten to spill out of your eyes and it’s pretty evident with the eye bags underneath your eyes that your sleep schedule was not relatively good these past few days.

stressful would be an understatement. you felt the burden of everything on your shoulders. the worst part? you don’t know where to start from. you don’t know what to do. it’s that time when things couldn’t have been any more worse and all you want to do is to stay in your bed all day long. your phone is on silent ever since you read the mails for submissions of your work when at this point all you’re doing is cramming.

how you wish you could call seungmin and ask him to come, but you can’t. he probably won’t be free. so you rather chose to cry about it on your own.

hugging seungmin’s plushie tighter you bury your face further into the pillows and let out a muffled sob. your body shakes as the sobs get stronger and you have to hold back a shriek when you feel a cold hand rubbing your back. you can’t see the look on his face but you feel him pull you to him as he hides your face in his neck, allowing you to further cry. but with him. not alone.

your arms instantly engulf around his torso as the sobs increase. your throat probably hurts from all those hours of crying but you need to get it all out at once. his soft breathing distracts you as he holds you tighter. his fingers comb through your dishevelled hair and you feel the sobs slowing down their rate.

upon noticing this, he pulls back a bit and cups your face. his eyes staring straight into yours and his expression rather gloomy, just like you. he hates it when you cry. he hates it when you don’t give yourself enough credit. he hates it so much especially when he isn’t there to comfort you and calm you down.

his fingers caress your cheek before he mutters softly, “i don’t know what happened that made you this sad but i want you to know that i’m here. always. whenever you need me and even if you don’t, i’ll be there for you when you need me sweetheart.”

it’s the way he wipes your tears with his thumb before taking your hands in his and pressing his lips to your knuckles. he does that twice before he leans your head on his shoulder. the soft humming and his affectionate behaviour never failed to make your heart warm.

“did you know that in the world of plants, the sprouting seed is a symbol of hope, growth, and transformation?” seungmin begins making you look up at him expectantly. “it starts with a tiny speck of life that has the potential to blossom into so much more. when the roots have grown, the sprout breaks through the surface of the soil, reaching out for the light. as the sprout continues to grow, the small root system expands and branches out, reaching deeper into the ground to absorb nutrients from the soil. the leaves unfurl, expanding and absorbing sunlight, while the stem rises up, reaching for the sky. each day brings new changes and developments as the plant grows taller, stronger, and more beautiful. just like you, my sweet. each day is going to be different. some days might be ew like today and some might make you smile so hard that your cheeks will hurt,” you let out a choked giggle at his words and wipe your tears.

seungmin chuckles at that and lets you take your time. he physically and mentally supports you by staying by your side. there’s no words exchanged just a comfortable moment of silence before you find yourself smiling between sobs.

“you’re going to make me cry too,” he mumbles and looks up at the ceiling to prevent the tears from dripping. you hit his chest softly and hug him again.

for the rest of the night all you hear is the sweet mumbles of compliments in your ears and the soft touches of affections is your comfort place. it reminds you of the sound of rain, like sitting in front of a fireplace and he is everything you ever wanted. everything you ever loved. everything.

[hotchreids-girl]

Would you kiss me [S.R]

Summary : A heated hurtful argument moment with Spencer Reid turns into being in the interrogation room alone with him .

Paring: Spencer Reid ! Fem!BAU!reader

Genre: angst/hurt/comfort

Content warning: heated hurtful argument both never been kissed before.

Word count 1K

Author notes this is part of the Teddy-ber event by @angellsell So I’m very nervous and scared to enter this event but I like a challenge and I love Spencer Reid I hope you love this and it lives up to your expectations but if you can see how nervous i am eek I did my best to proof read this was fun I’m just nervous since I’m newbie at fan fiction

I’ve always wanted to be the one in the integration room with Spencer Reid .

The song while writing this

You had been a part of the BAU for a few years now, and that is how long you've known Dr. Spencer Reid—the brilliant genius with striking brown eyes, tall and slightly awkward in his own charming way. His mind worked at lightning speed, unfurling the intricacies of human behavior in a way that left you in awe. He was handsome in a way he was completely unaware of, which only added to his appeal. You admired him, not just for his intellect but for his kindness, humor, and the way he made you feel understood.

But then there was the incident that changed everything. You were deep in the middle of a case where the tension was palpable, and emotions ran high. In the heat of the moment, something in the air snapped. You found yourself embroiled in a heated argument with Spencer—his voice elevated as he expressed his frustration. “you’re not thinking this through! You’re putting everyone at risk!” His words felt like a stab to your heart, especially when he addressed you by your full name.

“Why can’t you just trust me?” you yelled back, your voice shaky with anger and hurt. It was the first time you had seen this side of Reid, and it made your stomach twist painfully. After a few more back-and-forth exchanges, you rushed away from him, needing space to gather your thoughts. The only place you could think of was the interrogation room—a place that usually breathed tension, but right now felt like the only sanctuary.

As you stepped inside and closed the door, reality struck. Tears started to roll down your cheeks, a mix of frustration and a feeling of deep sadness that you couldn’t quite articulate. You sank into one of the chairs, burying your face in your hands. It felt like a lifetime before you heard the soft knock on the door.

Hey can I come in please? It was Spencer’s voice. Panic flooded your veins. No you thought to yourself How did he find you? —You weren’t ready to see him , “You took a deep breath, trying to gather yourself, but your heart was racing. When he opened the door, his eyes widened at the sight of your tears. Without hesitating, he stepped into the room and came closer to you.

“Hey,” he said softly, his voice laced with concern. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to—” He hesitated as he reached out, gently wiping away the tears that continued to fall. His touch was electric, sending a shiver down your spine. You pulled away, desperation clawing at your insides as you tried to cool your swirling emotions.

“Spencer,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “Just give me a moment.” You sat back in the chair, heart racing, trying to find the words to fix the pieces of this fragile moment. Silence settled between you, heavy and loaded.

“Say something, please,” Spencer urged after a moment, his eyes searching yours. You looked up at him, and for the first time, you could see how vulnerable he was, an echo of the frustration that had just transpired.

“I…I never thought you would go off like that on me,” you finally managed to say, your voice trembling slightly. There was a hurt behind your words that whispered of something deeper than mere disagreement.

“I know. Me neither,” Spencer replied, his brow furrowed with regret. “I just—”

“Spence,” you interrupted, wanting to steer the conversation toward lighter waters, “can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” he replied, shifting in his seat, his posture indicating a mix of curiosity and nervous energy.

You bit your lower lip, suddenly unsure about this question, feeling the complexity of the moment weigh on your heart. “What do you think of me?”

He shifted again, clearly searching for the right words. “Well, you’re brilliant and kind and… and you care deeply about people. Honestly, I admire you more than you know,” he admitted, a soft blush creeping onto his cheeks.

Your heart swelled at his words, but an unexpected question bubbled to the surface. “Spencer, have you ever been kissed before?”

His eyes widened in surprise. “Um, no,” he said, almost sheepishly. “Have you?”

“No,” you replied, your voice barely a whisper as your heart raced in anticipation of where this conversation might lead.

He looked at you, uncertainty mixing with something else—maybe curiosity or a powerful yearning.

“So… could you, I mean, would you kiss me?” The words tumbled out of your mouth before you could stop them, vulnerability and hope dripping from your voice.

Spencer’s gaze held yours, and for a long moment, the world around you faded away. “ are you serious?”

You nodded, heart pounding. The space between you felt electric, every unsaid word crackling in the air. “I think… I think I want to.”

The moment seemed to stretch on forever as his expression shifted, something akin to disbelief mingling with a spark of excitement shining in his eyes. “I want to too,” he breathed.

Tentatively, he leaned closer, the air thick with anticipation and all the tension that had built up between you two. Your instincts kicked in, and you closed the gap, your lips meeting softly in a hesitant kiss. It felt like time stood still, a mixture of everything you both had kept bottled inside. His lips were warm against yours, exploring gently yet passionately, as if both of you were discovering something new and exhilarating.

When you finally pulled away, both of you were breathless, eyes locked.

“ Wow Spencer says I never thought it could feel this incredible your heart racing at his words .

With your fingers tanged up , moving in slow motion, you lean in on his chest putting your head on his chest Spence I’m not sure what this means if it even means anything but can we just stay here a moment longer please? Yes he said softly.

[hopelessromantic5]

Arthur is found by a little old witch in the woods, and is cared for.

But the witch realizes that her magic is no good on him.

She hovered her hands over Arthur’s body, with her eyes closed. Arthur could see the light cascading out her fingertips but he could not feel anything.

“Ah.” She said, smiling at him sweetly. “You are protected by one very great indeed, young warrior. My magic cannot even help you, let alone could it hurt you.” She giggled, as if this was something funny.

Arthur, high on pain and unable to move at all without searing hot flashes of it, was a tad put out.

“Is there something wrong with me?”

She shook her head.

“The opposite. The magic that protects you is more powerful than any I’ve felt, in all my years. And there were a lot of years, believe me. The person watching out for you, Arthur Pendragon, must care for you a great deal. Especially in knowing how you feel about the subject of sorcery.” She rattled these things off as if it were idle chitchat, as she went about the room collecting herbs and creams and throwing them into the pot in her hands.

Arthur was extremely confused. About everything that was said, but definitely one thing.

“You know who I am?”

“Of course. I wouldn’t invite anyone into my home without knowing who they were.”

“You helped me anyway? Knowing my father executes magic users?”

Arthur could not find it in himself to be afraid, he knew he was in no danger, and she’d just said she couldn’t hurt him or heal him with magic. So that’s good at least. She could’ve left him for dead, another reason to be thankful.

He had no intention of mentioning any of this healing excursion to his father.

“You would not turn me in. I know you have a true and noble heart. You are the Once and Future King.” She smiled over her shoulder at him and continued on her way.

Arthur played back the entirety of what she’d mentioned previously and his brows furrowed even more, if possible, giving him a slight headache.

He didn’t mean to appear rude but the question just came tumbling out of him.

“Someone powerful is stopping you from using magic on me? With magic?”

She turned back to her work station, which faced Arthur’s bed, and nodded again.

“Your guardian angel.” She smiled again, very sweet but also secretive. A smile of knowing things that Arthur had yet to even begin to comprehend.

Arthur was struck back to his fathers voice saying that same phrase. And all the numerous times he’d come away from a battle he thought lost, with nothing but a few scratches.

Someone was saving him.

Time and time again. Someone was always there.

But who?

The woman’s head snapped up from her working hands as if reading his thoughts. But still no malice was found in her eyes, only concern.

“Heed my words.” She began. Nothing good ever started with that. “They are not your foe. They have been there time and time again, you know it. In your heart of hearts. A moment will come when you must make a choice. If you turn this into a war, as your father did, everything you hold dear will be lost. Your kingdom, your happiness, the color of the world through your eyes. You will see nothing but grey ash.” A tear slid down her cheek and Arthur could feel them welling in his eyes, though he didn’t know why.

“But,” she smiled wetly. “If you choose to trust your heart, and open it to them willingly, you will prosper. Even in death, you will not truly die, as so many men do. You will be the Once and Future King, and your soul will live forever.” Arthur blinked, and he felt the wetness because he knew he was crying. But he didn’t feel sad, he felt ecstatic. Like it was bursting out of him, but he couldn’t move. Because everything was still broken and sliced open, making him vulnerable to everything. Even the feelings in the air, which Arthur usually held a dutiful immunity to.

“Who?” He managed to croak out, when he regained his princely manner.

“I will not tell you, Arthur. And you would be wise not to go looking. The answer to your question will come in its own time. For now, keep learning.” And then she winked, like Arthur was supposed to know what that meant. And how was he supposed to just keep going with the knowledge that someone close to him, or someone who thinks highly of him, has protected him even in knowing they could be caught at any second, knowing they would die. All to save Arthur.

At the thought, he wondered why his life was worth so much. Yes, knights uphold their honor and would fight and die for Arthur or Uther. But Arthur didn’t meet many sorcerers with loyalty of that kind.

Or maybe he didn’t really meet any sorcerers. Unless they were heading to the pyre and looking down their last minutes.

Of course, the sorcerers he’d come in contact with didn’t fancy a chat, because Uther never offered it. There was never a question. Magic equals death. It didn’t matter if it was healing, or helping a dying crop, or growing a shade tree for the children.

In the low light of the old woman’s tent, everything made perfect sense.

But it didn’t.

Because, not very many people knew that Arthur didn’t always agree with his father on these matters, Uther would never allow that to be made too public.

Maybe guards had heard something and whispered their secrets to handsy maids, or stable boys. Whatever the preference.

It would be entirely possible for the staff of the castle to know things that they shouldn’t.

So that narrows it down to about…three hundred people give or take.

Lovely.

Arthur took a deep breath and heard the old woman’s words in his head.

So he stopped thinking of it, stopped trying to find an answer and just waited for it to come to him. Or for death. Whichever came first.

The next day, as he woke, he almost startled realizing he wasn’t in his bed, and wouldn’t see Merlin first thing, but then didn’t because it hurt too much.

“Do not fret. It is almost time for you to go, Arthur Pendragon.”

“What do you mean?”

Then he heard it. A faint voice. Like music to his ears.

Yelling his name.

Oh thank heavens.

Merlin found him.

He always found him.

A pang of…something hit his heart before he could stop it and it upset him deeply.

But then the smile returned, because he was about to go home.

The woman came and helped him up, dressed his various wounds with her mysterious poultice once more, and then turned to look him straight in his ocean blue orbs. Right into the very depths of him. Hers were almost clear, like the sky.

“I know you have love for your father, but he lives in fear every day of his life. All of his decisions are made out of that fear. You cannot be the King your people need you to be if you follow in his footsteps. Choose love instead. Always. Even when it’s most difficult.”

She walked him out of the canvas tent and into the cool winds of spring morning.

“I wish you the best of luck, my King.” She bowed her head. The first sign of respect for any title, she had ever shown him. He almost blushed because of it. And he felt proud. To have someone like her rooting for him.

He would think about that old woman and what she told him, for years to come.

“Arthur?” The voice was getting closer. Then a lanky body burst through the line of trees and found him standing there, strapped together with bandages.

Arthur turned back to introduce the woman to Merlin, but she was gone.

And so was her tent.

It had all vanished.

For a moment he thought he was insane. But looked down at the helpful linens that were holding ointments on his carved skin, and knew that he hadn’t made it up.

“Arthur!” Merlin ran straight for him, but stopped a few feet off, clearly seeing he was hurt.

“Thank God you’re alive. I mean I knew you were, I knew you wouldn’t leave without sending me to the stocks one last time for good measure.” Arthur was smiling, he could feel it. He’d missed his friend. More than he should’ve.

He wished he could hug him, but as previously stated, he could barely move.

“I could go for a hug,” he admitted. “But I can’t really move anything without…ya know, pain.” He was still a little woozy and wanted to just get on with the journey.

“Guess I’ll have to help you on your way then.” Merlin sighed, but smiled anyway and looped Arthur’s good arm around his shoulders.

Then they walked.

And walked and walked and walked.

And neither of them said anything.

Arthur was lost in his own thoughts about destiny and the people that would one day rely on him for protection and peace.

Merlin had issues of his own he was meddling through, Arthur assumed.

And when the limping boy realized they’d been walking all day in complete silence, and hadn’t stopped once.

He finally voiced a question.

“Were you wounded?”

“What?” Merlin asked quietly.

“In the battle. Trying to get away, were you wounded?” Arthur’s eyes scanned his body and did not see any marks on his pale skin.

“No, I got away unscathed. Can’t say the same for you though.” He looked down, assessing Arthur’s own wounds.

“Did someone help you?”

“Yes.” He answered shortly. “An old woman. She was very kind.”

“She looks like she knew what she was doing. So I’m glad.” Merlin didn’t ask any more questions, Arthur was grateful.

“How did you find me?”

Merlin looked sheepish for a moment, but schooled it, and managed to get the redness out of his neck before it spread to his face.

He shrugged.

“I’m not really sure. I just had a feeling. Like I said, I knew you weren’t dead. So I just, kind of, followed my gut. And it led me to you standing in a field all by yourself.” He chuckled, as if the scene were funny.

“Hmm.” He said. Then looked around, and noticed there was water running somewhere.

“There’s a stream nearby, and it’s getting dark. We’ll stop and finish the journey tomorrow.”

“Alright. I’ll gather wood for a fire.” Merlin led him to a log and leaned him up against it for support.

Arthur could only watch as Merlin went about gathering dry wood where he could find it.

In the process of that, Arthur fell fast asleep.

In the darkness, Merlin crawled to Arthur and began to heal all his many wounds. Black smoke rising from them as they closed and left nothing but a scar.

Arthur would think the old woman’s poultice worked well. And they would be able to get home that much quicker.

Before Arthur opened his eyes the next morning, he knew something was different.

He tested his leg and it moved without delay or surging pain. His arms in the same strong condition.

His eyes flung open, and he ripped the bandages off to reveal closed skin.

Arthur might be a bit dull sometimes but he knows fairly well that nothing of any mortal nature could heal him so quickly.

But the old woman. She’d said no one could touch him with magic. Helpful or otherwise.

So what had done this?

His eyes glanced his surrounding and found only one clue.

A body curled in on itself with dark curls springing out.

Merlin.

But it couldn’t be. Merlin might not be as much an idiot as Arthur usually claimed. But he was no sorcerer.

Was he?

The pieces started clicking together. Merlin was always the one to conveniently drag him to safety.

He’s always the one there when unexpected victories are won.

Merlin.

Of course.

Something in Arthur must’ve known. Because he was not surprised even for a second. It almost seemed right in his mind. Merlin. Magic. Of course.

But that means Merlin’s been the one risking his life every single day, just to do what? Muddle about and polish armor? Muck out the horses?

If Merlin was as powerful as the old woman said, why did he stay? And why didn’t he trust Arthur with his secret?

Merlin started to rouse.

Arthur had to make a decision.

Confront him or act oblivious?

[worseforwords]

Barcelona Breathlessness (Ona Batlle x Reader)

Here it is: the fourth and final part of this series. I strongly recommend you read the other parts first. You can find them here: Part 1: Manchester Meet-cute, Part 2: Manchester Memories, Part 3: Barcelona Beginnings.

“Hi, come in.” You said softly, the expression on Ona’s face sending shivers down your spine as you stepped aside to let her into your new home. “Want something to drink? Coffee, tea, water?” “Just a water, please.” She said as she stiffly sat herself down on your couch. You poured two glasses of water and joined her on the couch, leaving some space between the two of you so you could turn and look at her. Ona however, kept her gaze straight ahead, fidgeting with something she was holding. When you looked down at her hands to see what it was, you felt your stomach drop: it was the little lion necklace. “I wanted to give this back.” She said numbly when she noticed you staring at her hands. “Oh.” Was all you could manage to get out as you felt your heart shatter. You sat there in silence for a bit, both avoiding eye contact. You knew she was with someone else, which kind of hurt, but this felt like an unnecessary added punch to the stomach whilst you were already down.

“Why did you keep it all this time?” You finally managed to get out. “It was a nice reminder to make the most out of everything and not to worry too much about the future. You know, Hakuna Matata.” She finally looked at you when she said those last words, only to quickly look away again when she continued. “But now, when I look at it, all I do is worry, so you can have it back.” She handed you the piece of jewellery. For a second there, you thought you caught some resentment in her voice. Your heart sunk to the floor at her harsh words as you tried to fight the tears from flooding your eyes. Once again you attempted to push down everything you felt, sending you into a numb state of coldness. When you didn’t move to take the necklace from her, Ona put it down on your coffee table. Even though very few words were exchanged, the actions spoke loud enough and it had become clear as day to you that she didn’t want anything to do with you anymore. “So did you come over just to give me that?” You asked heartlessly, pointing at the necklace on the coffee table. She looked up at you in disbelieve. “How do you do that?” She asked in a defeated tone. “Do what?” “How do you just turn everything off and become completely cold? At first I thought you might have changed, but I refuse to believe this is what you have become.” You thought about her confrontational question for a bit before saying: “I am just trying to protect myself.” “Protect yourself from what?” She asked, bewildered. “From you, Ona.” You said quietly as you deliberately kept your gaze away from her. 

When no sound came from the other side of the couch for the next minute or so, you couldn’t help but to turn back around and check on Ona. You were met with the heartbreaking sight of Ona with her face buried into her hands and you noticed some tears escaping. You couldn’t maintain your numbness, as the sight immediately tore down all the walls you had just built up. “I’m sorry.” You said, as a single tear now also fled your eye, whilst you tried to find the right words to say. “Look,” you started. “back in Manchester, we had a magical time and I fell for you and your beautiful hazel eyes way faster than I have ever fallen for anyone.” She finally removed her hands to look up at you with said hazel eyes and you swallowed before you continued. “It was short and sweet, so, so very sweet, but also very short. It was sad when it ended, but we always knew that was going to happen. I always have cherished the memories we made and I never regretted it for a single second, but when I got back to my normal life I moved on, I truly did.” She looked up at the ceiling as you saw tears filling her eyes again, so you quickly carried on. “But then I saw you again earlier this week and it was like the old butterflies I had for you instantly woke up from their 4 year coma.” Her gaze went right back to your eyes, as if she was verifying that you were being genuine. “So, I don’t think I can be just friends with you, Ona. I tried to be platonic but it just came out as cold and heartless.” Ona remained quiet, now staring at her shoes. 

“Can you please say something?” You pleaded. You knew she was probably just gathering her thoughts before speaking, but the silence was killing you as seconds felt like hours after everything you just confessed. You were focussing on keeping your breathing in tact, when Ona suddenly rose up from the couch. Thinking she was going to leave, you also got up to try and stop her. “Ona, please don’t - I - I take it al b-” You were stopped in your blurting when you noticed she wasn’t leaving, instead taking two steps towards you. She was now only a few inches away from you, and whispered “Don’t.” whilst softly grabbing your chin in between her thumb and index finger. You slightly opened your mouth, but no words came out as your heart started racing due to the close proximity you were in, desperately awaiting her next move. She used her thumb to pull your face down, which could only be a sign that the smaller girl wanted to have your lips at an approachable hight. Your breath hitched as she slowly moved closer to you, almost closing the gap between you when you gathered all your courage to abruptly move away from her. “Not like this.” You said as she send you a puzzled look. “Not like what?” She asked. “Not when you’re with someone else.” You said, standing your ground. “When I’m WHAT?” She said stumped. “Don’t act all innocent now, I know you’re with someone, I saw the photos.” You said, to which Ona’s eyes widened instantly. “I can’t believe it. That’s what this was about? Oh my god Y/N why didn’t you just ask me about it?” She exclaimed, now pacing the room. “I guess I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” You said softly. “Well you need to stop doing that, it’s clearly not working!” She shouted. “Clearly.” You mumbled. “Y/N,” she stopped her pacing to turn back to you and firmly grab your face with both hands, as you were obviously still clueless as to what she was trying to say, “we broke up almost two months ago!” 

Time stood still for a second as all you wanted to do was smack yourself in the face with the most solid object you could find. This was all your fault. Once again you had managed to ruin something that could’ve been great thanks to your lack of communication. Ona was right, if only you had listened to Amy and just asked her about it. Your mind went back to the present as you realised you must have been staring into space all flustered with wide eyes for at least a minute, looking like some kind of maniac. You noticed Ona staring at you frantically, awaiting your respons. You cleared your throat. “I-” You started. “I really don’t know what to say. I’m sorry?” “Was that a question?” She scoffed. “No, no, I’m sorry. I really am. You’re right, I should’ve asked instead of making assumptions. I’m sorry for ruining everything.” You breathed out, and her frantic expression started to soften ever so slightly. “Did I though? Ruin it, I mean?” You asked carefully to which a soft expression with a hint of compassion appeared on Ona’s face as she contemplated how to answer your question. 

Before she could answer however, you walked over to the coffee table to grab the little lion necklace. “May I?” You asked, slowly moving it up to her neck. She nodded, and you softly held the little lion onto her collarbone, moving one hand to the back of her neck to close the golden chain. You struggled with the clasp for a second, making her giggle slightly. When you finally succeeded, you left your hand where it had been, now softly caressing the back of her neck. You leaned down slowly, to place a delicate kiss on the little lion rested on her chest. When you noticed Ona closing her eyes, you moved your mouth to her ear. “Hakuna Matata.” You whispered, before gently kissing her cheek. Her breath hitched at your subtle touches, and you placed another kiss on her cheek, to then slowly move down her jaw. The kisses were brief and so very soft, but you could still taste the saltiness from the previously shed tears on her skin. You continued until no part of her face was left untouched by you lips, except from her mouth. The latter you bypassed because you didn’t want to move there without her reciprocation.

When you eventually moved away, Ona slowly opened her eyes, glancing into yours longingly straight away. You both simultaneously let out a deep breath, trying to calm yourselves down a bit, before Ona pulled you into a tight hug. “You didn’t.” She whispered, finally answering the question you asked earlier. A soft smile appeared on your face as you pulled away from the embrace to look at her again. Your eyes started watering once more, but this time with tears of relief.

“So, erm, what now?” You asked, to which the both of you started giggling. The laughter felt great, finally enabling you to release some of the tension built up in your body. “I have a day off tomorrow, want to go do something fun?” She asked. “Yes, it’s a date!” You answered, making the both of you chuckle again at the reference, before her face returned to a more serious expression. “Let’s take things slow this time, actually built something, okay?” Ona said wisely, to which you nodded in agreement. “Shit,” Ona’s expression suddenly changed as she glimpsed at the clock, “I have to go, training.” She hurried herself out the door, but not before hugging you one last time, squeezing tightly. “See you tomorrow, Y/N.” You closed the door when she was out of view and immediately plopped down on the couch, letting out a big sigh. The rest of the day went by quickly, and by the time you were in bed, you still had a big, fat grin on your face you could not get rid off even if you wanted to. 

For your distinctly labeled date, you decided to have a nice beach day. Once again, you nervously shot up straight upon hearing the doorbell. This time however, it was a good kind of nervous, the excited kind. You quickly grabbed your bag and ran towards the front door. “Hi!” You definitely preferred this cute smile on the girl standing in front of you over yesterdays expression. “Hi, Ona.” You smiled back broadly as you both got in her car to drive to the beach. 

The weather was perfect, which was of course to be expected on a Barcelona beach day: blue skies and sunshine. Ona had taken you to a beach a bit further away from the city, so it was rather quiet. You both put your towels down on the sand, and you rummaged in your bag to find some sunscreen. You applied some of it on your face and arms, and then took of your shirt to rub some on your belly and chest, thereby exposing the bikini top that you already had on underneath it. You looked to you side to see Ona had stopped doing whatever she was doing before, and she was clearly eying you up, before quickly looking at the sky when she noticed you had caught her. “Something wrong?” You giggled. “Wha- I wasn’t-” her face started heating up. “I think those cheeks could use some sunscreen too.” You interrupted her nervous rambling, handing her the bottle, which she then snatched out of your hands. She took off her shirt as well and you swallowed hard. It was now your turn to try to hide the flustered expression on your face as your eyes scanned her abs that had only grown more toned in the past 4 years, her soft skin that you had gotten only a small taste of yesterday and her strong arms that could easily pick you up, or pin you down, or so many other things. “Can I help you with your back?” Ona asked, waking you from your daydream, only just before you started drooling. “Yes, please.” You quickly turned to lie down on your stomach, not missing the smirk on her face in the process. 

She started off softly, dainty little strokes of cold lotion, sending shivers down your spine. She took her time, gently caressing every inch of your back until the friction and the sun started warming you up. She slowly added more force to her movements, firmly pushing her thumb into all of your back muscles, massaging you into a state of pure bliss. You soon woke up from this state however, upon realising how your muscles must feel like tiny pockets of mashed potatoes to her and her athletic body, so you quickly turned around. “My turn!” You yelled as you basically launched her off of you, rolling her onto her stomach, making her gasp and then giggle at the sudden movements. You took a moment to admire her figure, before tracing her tattoos with some sunscreen on your fingertips. Some you recognised, others were new. You felt Ona tense up slightly when you moved towards her left shoulder. You stopped moving your hands when you saw why. “How long have you had this?” You asked softly. “About 4 years.” She mumbled, looking as far away from you as possible. You moved your hands to her arms and leaned down to place a gentle kiss on the tattoo on top of her shoulder. “Hakuna Matata” it read. 

When you were both fully covered in sunscreen, you decided to take a dip in the Mediterranean Sea. Ona of course, being a both an athlete and a Catalonian, swam like a mermaid whilst you tried to keep up with her, splashing around like a dog. You laughed as Ona attempted to impress you with an underwater handstand and summersault, and she laughed when you desperately held onto her as the waves almost carried you away. You swam around and played with a beach ball for a bit, until both of you got tired, well, you were pretty sure she just pretended to be tired to make you feel better, as she carried you out of the water and all the way back with her strong arms.

She laid you back down on your towel before plopping down next to you. You lay on your stomach, head resting on your arms and you glanced at the Catalonian girl you never wanted to stop staring at whilst the sun heated up your body. As your skin absorbed the warmth, you felt your body relax and your brain becoming foggy. You closed your eyes and the world faded away for what felt like a second, before the smell of Mediterranean herbs woke you up. You opened your eyes to find an empty towel next to you and you slowly lifted your head. “Hi there, sleepyhead” A soft voice called out from behind you. You turn around to discover you had been out for a while, because Ona had prepared you a whole picnic in the mean time. She had brought some home cooked meals, like a Spanish omelet, some bread and dips, and even some wine. “Hi,” You spoke softly, “what’s all this?” “Well, dormilona, you don’t go out with a Spaniard without them bringing lots and lots of food.” You looked at her with the tenderest of smiles, while you sat yourself up straight. “Ona,” you said wholeheartedly, “this is adorable. Thank you so, so much.” 

When you had both thoroughly filled up on the delicious food and wine, you sat back in silence for a bit, as dusk began to fall, before Ona got up and held her hand out to help you up as well. She dragged you along for a bit, eventually ending up at the far end of a pier. There you stood, amid the quietly rippling sea, with a dazzling view of the setting sun, and an even better view of the girl still holding onto your hand. “Wow.” Was all you could say, breathing in deeply to inhale the smells of the salty sea whilst taking it all in. “I feel like I’m dreaming.” “You’re not.” Ona replied as she put her other hand on your cheek, turning you to fully face her. You softly settled your free hand on her waist as you locked eyes and you slowly leaned in. She tilted her face up slightly, thereby making her lips accessible to yours. You closed your eyes and your heart started racing as you savoured the drumroll right before closing the final bit of space left between you, landing into a gentle kiss. At first you both remained still, carrying each other’s lips like you would in a tight embrace. You both woke up from the initial tranquility when you let go of Ona’s hand to move your now free hand up to the side of her neck, tracing her jaw with your thumb. Both your lips engaged in a delicate dance of lustful lips, noses inhaling the same fragment of air left between the two you. Hands were now clutching onto jaws, necks, hair and waists desperately, not wanting this moment to ever end. When you did eventually pull apart, the sun had almost fully set. “Wow.” Ona broke the silence. “Wow indeed.”

You packed up your towels and belongings and drove home in a comfortable silence, as you were both still speechless from the kiss. When you arrived at your doorstep, you fell into a tight embrace, with neither of you wanting to let go. You hesitated for a bit, knowing very well what you had agreed upon yesterday, before asking: “Do you want to come in?” “Yeah.” She answered, and you held the door open for her. No time was wasted on movies or drinks this time, as she immediately lifted you up by your hips to push you up against the wall once the door was closed.

You woke up early to a beam of light shining into your eyes and the feeling of warm skin underneath your face, slowly moving up and down. Once you came to your senses, you realised you must’ve been too distracted the night before to close the curtains in your bedroom, to which you giggled softly. Your brief and minor movement apparently caused Ona to wake up as well, as you heard a soft groan beneath you. “Good morning, guapa.” You said, looking up at her as her eyes slowly opened up, frowning at the light. “Bon dia,” she replied, smiling, “let me make us some breakfast.” “But we're at my place, I should make breakfast.” You replied. “Please, I’ll figure it out. After all, I have a feeling I might become a regular here.” She smirked, as she got up from your bed to quickly put on some clothes, leaving no room for you to argue.

Whilst you remained in your bed, you could hear Ona rummaging through your cabinets, expertly preparing something that would undoubtedly turn out delicious, whilst speaking to someone on the phone. At first you mostly heard laughter, but it soon became more quiet and Ona suddenly sounded rather anxious and frustrated. You swiftly put on your sweatpants and a jumper and you went downstairs to see what was going on. “Sí, lo sé, pero-” She stopped talking when she noticed you walking into the kitchen. “Tengo que ir, chao.” She said to the person at the other end of the line before hanging up. “That sounded serious, what was it about?” You asked carefully. “Nothing, it was just one of my teammates. Don’t worry about it.” She said, deliberately keeping her eyes on the breakfast she was making. “Ona, that just makes me more worried. You can tell me what’s going on, you know.” You grabbed her cheek, moving her face so she had to look at you. “Okay.” She started as she grabbed your wrist, nervously dragging you towards the couch to sit you both down.

“Here’s the thing. She mentioned something to me, and now I am worried about us. My schedule is very busy, and I have very few weekends off. Not to mention being away a lot for national camps and stuff. It is why I dated a teammate for so long, it’s why so many of us do. It’s not easy to have a girlfriend who is a footballer, and I don’t know if I can give you what you need, or better, what you deserve.” She rambled anxiously. “Girlfriend?” Was all you could answer, widening your eyes in expectation. “Y/N. You’re focussing on the wrong thing.” Ona grumbled. “You want me to be your girlfriend?” You asked with a small smile on your face, still not wanting to let her slip of the tongue go. “Well yes, but-” “Okay, my turn.” You interrupted. “I know what I am getting myself into. I know you’re busy, I know football is the most important thing to you right now and I would never ask you to change that. But I want this Ona. I want to be a part of your life, even if I am just a small part. I want to try. Please let me try?” You asked, looking at her with your very best puppy dog eyes. “Yeah, okay.” She smiled. “And you won’t just be a small part, I promise.” She added, to which you both smiled softly.

“Soooo,” You started. “girlfriend, huh?” You giggled. “Well I wasn’t planning on asking you this way, or this soon, but I guess there is no way out of it now.” She chuckled. “Y/N,” she started, grabbing both of your hands, facing you and directly looking into your eyes, “will you be my girlfriend?” The smiles on both your faces grew wider by the second. “Yes, of course I will Ona.” You said as you leaned in for a soft but passionate kiss, before pulling her in for a tight hug. You both chuckled. “So much for taking things slow.”

[pink-sparkly-witch]

The One That Got Away - Chapter Eleven

Warnings: angst, language, fluff.

Word Count: 1.6k

Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x Female Reader

A/N: I didn’t have a beta for this, so all mistakes are mine.

You can catch up here!

 My Masterlist AO3    Ko-Fi

“Are you only here until your father goes, or are you back for good?” Dean asked, and Y/N bit her lip and furrowed her brow.

“It depends,” she finally responded.

“On what?”

“If you and I can be okay,” Y/N said, deciding complete honesty was the best way to handle this, and lifted her eyes to meet his. “I’m not expecting things to go back to how they were, De. Too much time has passed for that, but I’d like us to try to be friends again. But I also need to be completely honest and tell you I never got over you.”

“Y/N…”

“Please, just listen,” she begged, “you read my letter, and you know I had some unhealthy coping methods. I’ve only had one serious relationship since I left, which ended when I turned down his proposal three years ago. He told me that he loved me, but I was emotionally unavailable, and he couldn’t stay with someone who couldn’t love him the way he loved them,” Y/N explained.

“When I finally started dating again after that, I always sabotaged it before it could get serious. That was when I knew I would never let anyone in the way I did you, and I’d never get over you. I understand this is a lot, and I get that you might not feel the same, but if you want to try and be us again, awesome. If you want to try and be friends again, great,” she paused and took a deep breath, licked her lips before speaking again. “But if you don’t want me here… if me being here hurts you, and we can’t fix things between us, I can’t stay because I can’t be this close to you and not be part of your life. It’ll kill me.”

There it was. Everything Y/N needed him to know before they made any decisions on their future. This was where her heart lay, shield and armour down, vulnerability showing as she laid her cards on the table and bared her soul to him.

Now it was his turn.

“Y/N, I…” Dean began, grabbing her hands and smiling softly as her watery eyes found his. “I never stopped loving you. I tried to move on, but I couldn’t. None of them would be you. Not even close. Every day since you left, I have regretted not asking you to stay or coming with you. Even now, having read your letter and knowing it was the best thing for us, I still regret it. I hate that making that decision meant I couldn’t comfort you after the nightmares or stop you from drinking away your pain. The sex thing? Well, I’m just pissed that I missed out on what sounds like it could’ve been some kinky shit!” Dean joked, chuckling as Y/N threw her head back with laughter.

“But,” he continued, “seeing you now, your smile reaching your eyes, the constant pain and sadness in them gone, and the confidence you’ve gained. It makes me realise that as much as I will always hate myself for letting you leave… letting you go… it was the right thing to do because you and I wouldn’t be where we are. You…”

Dean swallowed hard, hating even the thought of what could’ve been. “You would be living your life completely in my shadow, or I would be in prison, and you probably wouldn’t be here at all,” Dean said, wiping away the tears falling down his cheeks.

“I know, Dean,” Y/N smiled sadly. “It broke my heart, and I won’t pretend otherwise, but it was the right thing for us to do. Please forgive yourself for that. I do. We needed to grow on our own. I had to learn to protect myself and not rely on you to fight my battles. I had to learn to take care of myself for once, to put myself first and fix myself. I might have taken the wrong path once or twice, but I righted myself and am incredibly proud of who I’ve become.”

“Seeing you at the hospital and tonight, I love who you’ve become, and I can’t wait to get to know her better. I would be honoured if, once I’m fully healed, you’ll let me take you out to dinner so I can continue to get to know you again,” Dean smiled, anxiously awaiting her response.

“I’d like that,” Y/N smiled bashfully.

“Just so we’re clear, I mean as a date,” Dean grinned.

“A date?” she questioned, “Dean, are you sure?”

“Yeah, I am, Princess. I meant it when I said I never stopped loving you. You’re still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and I wanna get to know you again. Try us again. So… what d’ya say? A fresh start?” Dean grinned at her bashful giggle before she lowered her eyes and looked at him through her lashes. His breath caught in his throat as he was taken back to their teenage years when she looked at him like that often.

“A fresh start would be perfect,” Y/N smiled as Dean’s face broke into a joyous grin.

“But,” she continued, and Dean’s smile faded slightly. “I think this has probably been enough excitement for you on your first night out of the hospital, so I’m gonna go home and let you rest,” Y/N smiled softly.

“Come on, sweetheart! I just got you back,” Dean protested, and she chuckled.

“Dean, you look like you’re gonna fall asleep in your seat!” Y/N reached her hand out to cup his cheek and smiled fondly as he leaned into her touch and closed his eyes.

“You’ve got my number now. You can call or text me anytime. I’m heading into four night shifts, so please don’t think I’m ignoring you if I don’t reply right away.”

Dean nodded in appreciation that she’d thought to tell him that. If he had texted or called her and she didn’t answer, he would overthink everything and convince himself that she’d changed her mind about starting over.

“Alright, you win,” he pulled back reluctantly. “I’ll call you in a few days, and maybe we can arrange that date?” Dean smirked, and she giggled.

“I thought we were waiting for you to be fully healed?” Y/N teased.

“Oh, trust me, sweetheart, I will be,” Dean replied.

“Still cocky, I see,” Y/N smirked and leaned forward, kissing Dean's cheek. Standing from the chair, she put her jacket on and slung her purse over her shoulder. 

“No, don’t get up,” she protested as he moved to stand. “I can see myself out.”

“You will not. I’m walking you out,” Dean grunted as he stood, the pain in his chest throbbing after sitting idle for so long. One glance at Y/N had him roll his eyes at the ‘I told you so’ look on her face.

“Look, I was gonna have to get up anyway to lock the door behind you and go to bed. I might as well do it now and make sure you get to your car okay at the same time.” Dean opened the door for her and leaned against it.

“I suppose I can’t argue with that, can I?” Y/N chuckled.

“Nope,” Dean said, popping the p.

“Goodnight, Captain Winchester.”

“Goodnight, Nurse Singer.”

The next few weeks passed in the blink of an eye. To everyone’s surprise, Dean had done what the doctor told him and taken it easy until Dr Clark cleared him to return to work. Bobby had put him on light duties on his first shift back, which he’d hated at first, but about sixteen hours into a twenty-four-hour shift, he was grateful that he had it that little bit easier after being out of the game for four weeks.

Y/N had adjusted to life back in Lawrence well. She was in a good routine with work and had stopped taking as many overtime shifts as she had when she first came back. She filled her days off, reconnecting with family and friends and making plans with the new friends she’d made since her return.

They’d kept in regular contact, texting and calling every day. She’d been to his place a few more times in the past few weeks, always, she insisted, to help him around the house or to make sure he ate a decent home-cooked meal. Dean didn’t complain because he got to spend all this extra time with her.

Y/N’s impromptu visits were filled with remembering the old days and catching up with everything that had been and gone since they’d last seen each other. Their disastrous dating lives had them in tears of laughter, and the stories of her time before therapy had them in tears of despair.

They knew these conversations needed to be had, and if Y/N was honest, she’d much rather they have them before they tried their fresh start. If they waited until they were officially dating before having the difficult conversations and Dean changed his mind about wanting a second chance, wanting her, she knew she wouldn’t survive his rejection.

After several heart-to-heart conversations and everything Y/N had gone through in her first few years in Chicago aired to Dean, the relief she felt that he still wanted to go on a date with her took her by surprise. It made her realise just how much he, and this second chance, truly meant to her.

It was overwhelming because her entire future depended on things working out between them. Y/N meant what she said, if Dean didn’t want her, she couldn’t stay in Lawrence, not even as his friend, because it would kill her. There would always be doors open for her in Chicago, and she knew that, but she was done running.

Next Chapter >>

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