#everyone; oh yeah it's the president's wife

[chuchuscoolhat]

Where's my beautiful dilf husband-?

Normally, meetings with the director were scheduled in advance or at the very least, scheduled a couple of hours earlier depending on the urgency of the matter being handled; after all the detective agency was in charge of cases of exceptional nature, oftentimes involving powers that went beyond casual disturbances, cases too difficult for the police to take control over; yet everyone knew of an untold yet not secret exception to the case; as the visits of the mentioned exceptional case were rather frequent albeit short lasting.

It only had been told once, yet everyone was quick to understand (past their own understandably surprised expressions) one thing...

He's gotten up from his seat already as soon as he was able to capture the scent of a particular familiar fragrance in the air, yet she didn't need to know of this, for he knew that Amrita seemed fond of surprising him. ❝ You should have stayed at home today, it is a cold day to be outside. ❞ He speaks with his usual calm tone of voice yet there is a tenderness in his mannerisms which is not shared with anyone else as he places his haori around her shoulders. A cordial bow and a small kiss over her forehead serve as his greeting as well as a way to test her temperature, wary of the season of colds that have been spreading around lately. ❝ Tea or coffee? ❞

[lqveharrington]

Winter Gala | C.S.

summary: Coriolanus’ first winter gala as Panem’s President and your first winter gala as First Lady.

pairing: young, president!coriolanus snow x fem, first lady!reader

includes: literally just fluff and kissing. (and some hints to reader being pregnant.)

a/n: some winter love for my favorite (aka coryo bb)

“Don’t you look gorgeous, my First Lady.” Coriolanus wraps his arms around your waist as you clip your earrings on, smiling at him through the mirror.

“You look pretty handsome yourself, Mr. President.” You turn in his arms and lace your own behind his neck, eyes flickering around his face. “First winter gala as the President, Coryo. That’s exciting.”

He lowers his arms down to your hips, placing a chaste kiss to your lips. “Let’s give them a night to remember.”

You let one hand drift to his lips, wiping some of the lipstick off. “Perfect.”

Truly, everything in the Snow Manor was perfect. The help decorated the walls and halls with the lights you deemed the best, and the cooks made the most delicious foods for those to come eat. There were christmas trees present in almost every room, with waiters holding champagne glasses on silver platers. Coriolanus and yourself made sure everything was perfect for the first winter gala as President of Panem.

All of those who held status in the Capitol were invited, along with the past district mentors whom you both attended classes with. There was press inside and unwanted paparazzi outside, immediately becoming the talk of those who arrived to the manor.

As the Snow manor filled with distinguished guests, you were hooked around Coriolanus’ arm like a beautiful trophy, conversing with only those you wanted to.

“It’s wonderful to see you again, Livia.” You give her your best smile, removing yourself from your husband to give her a brief hug. “I’m sure Festus has been a pain, as usual.”

“Don’t say that.” She quietly laughed, giving her own husband a glance before looking at the manor in awe and grabbing two champagne glasses of a server’s plate. “Here.”

“Oh no, thank you.” You decline politely, folding your hands together.

“Suit yourself.” She placed one back onto another plater. “The place looks wonderful. The lighting is everything.”

“Thank you. I do love a—“

“Excuse me, ladies, but could I borrow my wife for a bit? It’s time for my speech.” Coriolanus cut in, sneaking an arm around your waist.

Livia nodded, gesturing toward you. “Of course.”

You give her one last smile before following Coriolanus. Sure, you wanted to converse with old classmates, but as the most popular couple in Panem, you had other duties to tend to.

“See Tigris yet?” You murmur in his direction as you ascend the stairs, Coriolanus’ hand placed on the small of your back.

He shook his head, “She didn’t show. She called and said she was busy with work.”

“That’s too bad. I was hoping to speak to her about an important matter.” You frown and mumble the last bit, your ringed hand lightly moving to your stomach. “Anyway, you must mention how you were delighted to see everyone come here today.”

“Of course, I will. You think I don’t remember that, beautiful?” He kissed your cheek as you reached the balcony looking over the foyer. “Ready?”

“Always.” You lace hands with him.

Coriolanus instructed someone to shut the main lights off and flash the spot light on you both, earning awed noises from the crowd below.

“Thank you all for coming to our first winter gala!” Coriolanus started and got applause from those in the audience.

He went on to thanking everyone who came and spoke about his time as President, calling out those who helped him win the election.

“And of course, I would not have done this all with my lovely wife. Give it up for her, yeah?” He spoke, your name flawlessly living his lips. You flush from the praise but wave to the people below, squeezing Coriolanus’ hand.

“Want to say anything?” He murmured as the applause quieted. You shook your head, resting your hand on your stomach again.

Coriolanus kissed your cheek once more before wrapping up his speech, raising his glass as a final gesture. Everyone else followed suit, your own glass of water being lifted.

“Wonderful speech, my love.” You show your pearly whites as he whisked you away to a hallway.

“That’s because you wrote it, darling.” He met your lips, feeling your grin widen in the kiss.

You let one hand rest on his chest while the other comes around to his neck, Coriolanus’ hands firm on your waist.

“I love you.” You mumble in between kisses, holding your urge to not slide your fingers through his slicked back hair.

He squeezes your waist, pulling you impossibly closer. “I love you more.”

read more about coriolanus here !!

©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms

[mashkaroom]

Hehe I'm glad people are liking this. Here is the chart for the pattern in case anyone wants to recreate it! If you want to skip the making-a-sweater part, you could just stitch this onto an existing sweater.

You could also go to the trouble of making a full sweater using basically any pattern. I made this one in as basic a way as possible. It's knitted bottom up in 2 rectangular panels (no increases or decreases) and i googled how to shape a neckline and followed the advice of the first video. Once all the pieces were sewn together, i picked up the neckline stitches and knit the collar in the round. If i was doing it again, i would make the actual neckline hole much narrower and also make sure to bind off as loosely as possible, bc thats the least stretchy part. I started the sleeves from the bottom up as well and increased every 3rd row. To be honest, i wasn't exactly scientific in my approach -- the front panel ended up a few inches shorter than the back. One sleeve is somehow substantially wider than the other, despite the fact that they have the same number of starting stitches. But none of that affected wearability or aesthetic! All this to say, don't be daunted by sweater knitting if you're not the most precise knitter -- it's a remarkably forgiving garment (more forgiving than a hat, for example).

Thank you everyone for your kind words :)), and I'd be happy to answer questions if anyone has them, though i make no promises for helpful advice

Hey guys wanna see something sooo cool and hot

My first sweater done!!!!

For those who don't recognize it, it's the Boston MBTA map :) started over a year ago, so it doesn't have the union square extension lol. I used duplicate stitching for the pattern.

[maturemenoftvandfilms]

Mr. Walz

Featuring Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz

Back in the late ‘90s, Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz, and now Vice President Kamala Harris’ running mate, was a high school teacher and football coach in rural Minnesota. I attended Mankato West from 2000-2004, having Walz for 11th grade history. Being gay at the time, I initially expected to hate Walz, because he was a football coach and a hunter. But he was accepting and really friendly with me; with everyone really. He’s genuinely the goofy teacher that was in the hallway greeting every kid every morning, giving high fives and fist bumps. He and his wife, also a teacher at the school, provided vital support during my formative years. And to be honest, I thought he was cute.

He was in his late 30s and about 21 years my senior at that time, about my height, which is just shy of five foot-nine. He was chiselled like most middle-aged men with a gut. He dressed conservatively, usually a short sleeve solid colored shirt with a tee shirt under it and trousers which seemed to be a few sizes too small. I couldn’t help but find myself staring at his tightly held manhood, which showed a clear outline of his thick cock. That bulge had me daydreaming during our meets and school outings. I would jerk-off with this image in my mind every night.

After graduation, I didn’t see my ex-teacher again until I attended a campaign dinner in Falcon Heights, Minnesota. He instantly recognized me, smiling broadly and gave me a big hug. We’re talking 20-something years ago, and to have your 10th-grade geography teacher remember you after all of that time, it means something. I couldn’t call him Gov. Walz, because he will forever be Mr. Walz.

We talked a bit then, and a couple times throughout the evening. He asked me about what I was up to, if I was dating, the usual chit chat. I was so giddy to see Mr. Walz that I confessed that I had a crush on him in high school. I told him I thought about him every night when I jack off. How I use a big carrot up my ass, and pretend it was his dick. And I told him I knew he would never like me, that way, but I had to tell him.

Surprisingly, he suggested I should come over to his hotel, later, placing his hotel room card on the edge of the sink right next to me.

"Wait here, I'll have an agent escort you to my room in an hour." He said before leaving. I looked around to see if anyone had noticed, but no one had, so I quickly grabbed the key.

Sure enough, an hour later, a secret service agent escorted me to his hotel. The journey upstairs was unbearable. Reporters to dodge, people for the agent to nod away. By the time I got to Mr. Walz’s room, I was afraid he’d think I wasn’t’ interested, but when I entered the room, he was ready and waiting. The lights were dim, Mr. Walz was in a hotel bathrobe, and he’d ordered porn on the television.

"Is this what you really want?" I asked.

"More then anything." He replied.

I made the first move, leaning in to kiss him and as soon as our lips met, his arms went around me. Quickly, he started unbuttoning my shirt, unzipping my pants, and basically tearing my clothes off as he moved his tongue around inside my mouth. His hand was on my hard dick, feeling and testing the size.

"Oh, yeah." He moaned, as he ran his hand down my tender, sensitive cock before squatting.

With his mouth at my crotch, he ran his tongue up all seven inches, before gently pushing me towards the bed. On the bed, our bodies melded into one. His hard dick was teasing mine, as once again, our tongues found the other's mouth. Hands everywhere, as we hugged and rocked each other. Kissing my way down his chest, I left a trail of saliva all the way to his cock. Taking him in my mouth, I began to suck while I swirled my tongue around his boner before he started thrusting into my throat, making me gag. I guess he got pretty turned on by what I was doing to him as he turned me around and put us into 69 position.

As Mr. Walz took my dick in his mouth, I took his dick in mine. I worked on it with such skill that he began moaning deep inside his throat as he sucked my dick. And he could really suck; he knew how to please a man. I began to feel him starting to breathe rapidly and shake. I knew he was going to explode soon. I was getting close as well.

Wanting Mr. Walz to fuck me, I quickly seperated, and rolled off the bed leaving him laying there completely naked with a huge hard-on. Hurrying to my pants, I pulled a tube of lubrication out of his pocket before I bounded back to the bed. After telling him I wanted him to fuck me, I tensely watched as Mr. Walz applied the lubricate to his cock, knowing the pain I was about to feel. I couldn’t help but thinking back to my high school years when I first saw him. I had always wanted Mr. Walz to fuck me since then. Now was the time.

“You got a nice tight asshole.” Mr. Walz told me as he rubbed some of the KY onto my asshole.

He lifted my legs and stared me straight in the eyes as he guided the head of his cock to my ass. As soon as his dick made contact, he immediately thrust all 8 inches into me. I gasped loudly, so loudly in fact that I’m sure the people in the next room heard.

“I’m going to really open up your asshole.” Mr. Walz called out with a wicked smile on his face as he slowly started fucking me.

Noticing each time the fat head of his cock passed my hard prostate, pre-cum would squirt from the tip of my dick. He reached down and scooped it up with his finger, brought it to his mouth and licked it clean.

"Oh, man, that's good." He said, as he scooped up more, but I pulled his finger to his mouth, and sucked it in.

We smiled at each other before he leaned forward and kissed me deep, our tongues caressed each other, sharing my pre-cum. Then as we kissed he sent his cock plunging deeper into me. I arched my back as I was forced to take more cock deeper into my ass than ever before.

“Yes, fuck me, Mr. Walz.” I found myself saying when he broke our embrace, “Give it to me, Mr. Walz. Make me yours!”

And he did just that. Mr. Walz started fucking me hard and fast. I took each of the strokes of his his old manhood willingly. I wanted to give him total pleasure and I could tell from the far away look in his eye that the old man was as lost in me as I was in him. I knew he was getting close, and I didn’t want to stop him, so I didn’t say a word about pulling out. Having only had sex with his wife for all those years, he didn’t think of it either. Soon he was filling my ass with ropes of cum, and I felt it filling me up.

After we got off and caught our breath, he looked at me and we both started laughing and telling each other how glad we were that we'd just met up today.

[asbestos4president]

Hamuel Burger and the American Dream episode 4 trancript

Episode title: Indeterminance Night and the Mercurial Vision (audiobook part one)

Patty: How about this?

Indie: So you're wearing a minecraft hoodie. Puke green cargo shorts. A tamagotchi necklace permanently stuck on the death screen. And on your head is a baseball cap with the text "the only thing I love more than chess is being an aunt". 

Patty: It's funny cause I'm not an aunt! 

Indie: I love it, I really do, but I'm just worried the Australian Prime Minister will see your outfit and not be able to avoid falling in love at first sight. That's how the Trojan war started! Another Trojan War would ruin my vacation!

Patty: You don't have to worry about that. I would never let a horse inside my home. In fact, I'm very afraid of horses. They have this permanently disappointed expression that always reminds me of my mother. Have you ever noticed that?

Indie: Fair. You know we didn't have to go to a thrift store to get you clothes, right? You are currently one of the richest women in America.

Patty: Which is exactly why we had to go to that thrift store! Look at all the bargains I got. Here's a mug that says "I Heart Root Canals!" Here's Glee: The Board Game! Here's a sock I lost back in 2014! I needed to buy all of this for my emotional wellbeing.

Wait, you're not mad, right? I know you weren't exactly your husband's biggest fan, but I get it if you don't want me spending his money on- have I shown you this one? It's a toaster that prints Hello Kitty on your breakfast! Yeah. Sorry. I'll ask if they have a return policy.

Indie: Actually, I think we can salvage this. Just put one of my blazers on over your hoodie and we can call it business casual. If anyone asks what business you're trying to be casual about, run.

Patty: Not the blazer! I don't want to look like Hillary Clinton.

Indie: Oh, honey. Hillary Clinton wouldn't be caught dead in those shoes. Now get out of here! Scram! Pokemon Go to the golf course! I love you.

Patty: What?

Indie: What? That was an exceedingly normal thing for the first lady to say to her wife. In fact, it would be highly suspicious if you didn't say it back.

Patty: Oh. Um. I love you too!

Indie: Oh, you love me? Embarrassing. I'm going to hold a press conference to tell everyone, and they're all going to point and laugh. 

Patty: Ugh. 

Ah, wait. Just one thing before I go. So I had this stack of letters… I usually keep them with me, but I can't find them. I'm really worried they were in that bag we threw out. If you have time to look through our stuff to see if they're there, that would be nice. They're really important to me.

Indie: Okay, love you, bye!

Patty: Nice try. If you find those letters, maybe I'll say it back!

[door closing]

(quieter, to herself)

Oh my god. Was that smooth? That felt smooth. Haha! I am a romance wizard!

Judith the Butler: Is Mrs. The President ready for her private jet to the golf course?

Patty: Ah! Judith! You scared me. Have you been here the whole time?

Judith (over creepy sfx): I have been here since before the world began and I shall remain here long after it ends, sweeping up the ashes in preparation for the next species of sentient life to find themselves in need of a butler. I see all and I know all, but what I see is none of my concern and what I know is none of yours. Does Mrs. The President have any further questions?

Patty: Many!

Judith the Butler: Good. Allow me to escort you to your ride. 

[scene change signified by music change to Mysterious Jazz]

Indie: Indeterminance Night and the Mercurial Vision, book the first. Based on a true story. Dedicated to Dr. Medulla O'Blongata, who said my work was derivative. Look at me now, bitch! Please call me if you read this. I miss us. 

Chapter the first.

Sitting alone on her bed, Space Baroness Indeterminance Night found herself conveniently reflecting on the events that had brought her up to this point. She had been but the Baron's lowly wife before a dashing assassin burst into their bedchambers and vanquished him with a laser sword. 

"Oh my," Indeterminance said, for she was wearing only her bedtime spacesuit, which was lacy and diaphanous but in a sort of futuristic way.

That was when the assassin had removed their helmet to reveal a torrent of violet hair. The most beautiful woman Indeterminance had ever seen was standing in her bedroom, and she made a mental note to introduce her to a better brand of conditioner. 

"My lady," said the assassin, dropping to one knee and taking Indeterminance's hand in her own. Indeterminance couldn't help but notice her sultry Space Australian accent. "My lady, I have come to save you from this wretched fate, for tales of your intellect and beauty have spread throughout the galaxy, and I knew I could not rest until I had you for my own."

"Aha!" Said Indeterminance. "Wait until the groupchat hears about this! They all said I needed to lower my standards because I would never find a hot butch space knight. Fools, the lot of them, and lacking in whimsy, too!"

"I must leave you now," said the assassin, her wide brown orbs clouded by sorrow, "for I have to fight off the guards. Would you do me the great favour of disposing of the body?."

"Anything!" gasped Indeterminance. "But what is your name, beautiful stranger? Will I ever see you again?"

"My name is Petroleum Hotdog. I have hidden seven letters around the space palace. If you collect them all, you shall find within the secret code by which to summon me. Until then, farewell, my love!"

"Like Slenderman!"

"This story is set on planet Mercury. I don't know who that is."

Then Petroleum vanished in a gust of violet petals, and Indeterminance was left holding only her right glove, still warm. She shook her head, dispelling any thoughts that might distract her from her mission, and slung the baron's corpse over her shoulder. Her biceps were large and hauntingly beautiful. She scuttled through the space palace, careful not to knock over any of the baron's space vases in which he kept clippings of rare space plants like dandelions and spinach. Under the sounds of fighting outside, she was able to make her way to the doors of the kitchen. They were wooden, a reminder of the planet humans had fled from long ago, and though Indeterminance had never seen a tree in person, the sight of them filled her with nostalgia. She pushed the doors gently, and-

Judith: Mrs. First Lady. What are you doing in the hotel kitchen, if I may ask?

Indie: Uhm.

(back into reading mode)

The space butler! There was no way she could tell them her secret plan to put the Baron's corpse in a blender and feed him to her pet asteroid, Cousin Rockmorton. They would never understand!

Judith: A blender, you say.

Indie: No! I just got lost looking for the hotel pool. Can you point me to it? And let the staff know that the first lady is in there and wishes to remain undisturbed.

Judith: Of course, ma'am.

Indie: Phew!

(back to reading mode)

Her plan having worked effortlessly, Indeterminance set forth for the space palace gardens, which were mostly full of rocks. Space fact: space has a lot of rocks in it. At the centre of the garden was a crater filled with clear blue water, a man made pool heated and dyed to mimic a geothermal spring. She dipped a finger in and tasted it. Chlorine and food colouring. This pool was the crown jewel of the garden, for though it was neither large nor deep, being able to afford decorative water on Mercury was a powerful status symbol. She positioned the baron's body at its side, ready to push him in. Surely he had just been staring at his reflection in the water when he lost his balance and fell.

Judith: I've brought refreshments for you and your companion, ma'am. I do hope I'm not intruding.

Indie: Gah! 

[splash]

My… Companion?

Judith: Yes, your gentleman friend. I can't quite make out his face under the… Is his skin rotting?

Indie: None of my friends are gentlemen, Judith! You know very well that I only associate with harlots and scoundrels. This is just my inflatable liferaft, and it has a skin condition that it's extremely sensitive about.

Judith: My apologies. I shall sit here and perform lifeguard duty as per section 46 of the Good Butler's Guide to Butlering Goodly, Swimsuit Edition. Look, it even has a centrefold containing a diagram of the proper technique by which to build a construction code appropriate sandcastle. In full colour! How very salacious.

Indie: You know, Judith, I suddenly feel rather too cold to swim. I may retire indoors. Is there a fireplace in this hotel at all? Do you think it may need topping up? I have acquired a rare and beautiful piece of kindling that looks like a dead man and smells like a dead man, but has been certified by several coroners to be a log. No need to look too closely.

Judith: There is a fireplace in the dining room, ma'am, however-

Indie: Say no more! I'm off!

(back to reading mode)

So there she was, Space Baroness Indeterminance Night, stalking through the palace like the mighty tigers of yore. Rather than an antelope, her prey was that most elusive beast: the fireplace! 

Writing fact: there are no tigers in space, but I couldn't think of another simile. 

Space fact: Well, actually, space is famously very large, so there could totally be space tigers out there somewhere, chilling. You're just not cool enough to be invited to their parties. 

Indie fact: Now I'm thinking about all the space tiger parties I haven't been invited to, and it's making me sad.

(out of reading mode)

Oh, there's the fireplace! 

(into reading mode)

She approached it trepidatiously, for it could attack at any moment, but all it did was hum quietly and loop the same gif of the platonic ideal of a fire. Gently, as she was a little sorry despite herself, Indeterminance placed the body down and turned her face away. However, instead of the scent of burning flesh reaching her nose, there was only 

(out of reading mode)

- is that seaweed?

Judith: 'tis merely my cologne, ma'am. It's supposed to be elegant and sensual, yet dangerous and masculine.

Indie: You smell like a dead jellyfish.

Judith: Elegant and sensual, yet dangerous and masculine. I came to inform you that this fireplace is electric, so you may have to find some other method by which to dispose of your government certified log. 

Indie: God. Alright. Well, I suddenly feel the need to perform a governmental inspection of the hotel garbage shoot in accordance with current health and safety standards. You know, making sure it's in good enough working order to transport large, cadaverous, formerly presidential items, just as a random example.

Judith (over creepy sfx): You needn't worry. I already tested the strength of the rubbish shoot this morning by tossing down the head chef of this hotel after he tried to serve you eggs that were one degree too cold. He's still in one piece, but so are airpods after you accidentally run them through the washing machine. 

Indie: I see. Are we paying you for these inspections, Judith?

Judith: Oh, no, I do it for the love of our glorious nation.

Indie: Alright, I'll hide this corpse the old fashioned way- with a shovel and a dream. You must have a shovel and a dream in you somewhere, Judith. Please?

Judith: I own no shovel, and I haven't had a dream in years. What's this about a corpse?

Indie: It was here that Indeterminance was confronted with a choice that would change her life forever. Could she trust the butler with the knowledge of her crime? Between her saintly dead mother, her neglectful father and her two horrible step sisters, Rutabaga and Trout, the only one left to raise her had been the butler. They had brushed her hair, tied her laces, soothed her when she cried… If she could not trust this one person, she could trust nobody at all. And yet, still she hesitated.

Judith: You hired me two weeks ago, ma'am. You're paying me ten dollars an hour.

Indie: Fine. Whatever. Just go ahead and ruin my narrative suspense, why don't you. Here's the deal: the president is dead. I replaced him with a purple-haired bisexual woman who wears sandals with socks and is overly passionate about moving horses around in some ancient boardgame. I feel pretty good about this decision. Now, are you going to help me hide his body, or am I going to have to hide yours as well?

Judith: Oh, the president? I've been trying to kill that fucker for years. Pass him over.

[thump]

Thank you. I shall wrap him up and dispose of him discreetly. Like a tampon!

Indie: It's that easy?

Judith: You're rich, you can kill whoever you want. Would you like a lemonade? 

Indie: But Indeterminance had no time to partake in the sweet juice of the lemon, for one more mystery remained to be solved: where were the seven secret love letters of Petroleum Hotdog? She checked the kitchens, the bathrooms, the dining hall, the study, the jewel-counting room, the observatory, the… Aha!

[phone dialling sounds / ringing]

Patty: Hi, you've reached the voicemail of Patricia Bur-

Asbestos: Whatcha doin'?

Patty: Recording my voicemail. It's kinda like when the library's closed so you have to stick your books in the return slot outside, but the slot is a recording of me saying "please leave a message after the beep". Say hi to whoever's listening to this!

Asbestos: No. I don't trust them. What are your intentions with my earth hostage, stranger? State them immediately or I shall blow up your mobile communication device with my mind! Also, please call back and explain to me what a library is. I've been pretending to know so that Patty thinks I'm smart, but based on the metaphor she just laid out, my prior hypothesis that it was some kind of dairy product or perhaps a fancy dog breed has become somewhat challenged. Love and kisses, Asbestos Sputnik Le Guin. 

Patty: What? You didn't tell me you had a cool middle name! Mine is Tomato. Anyway. Please leave a message after the beep. Bessy, do you want to…?

Asbestos: Beeeeeeeeeeeee-

(prolonged coughing fit)

-eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! And don't call this number again, you hear me? Bad things will happen if you do! Real bad th-

[recording ends]

Indie: Hello my normal wife. I'm choosing to ignore whatever that was in favour of informing you that I have found your missing correspondence, and that it was in your other jacket. You know, the one that's exactly the same as your regular jacket except in a slightly greyer shade of green. Don't worry, I haven't read your letters! I am a woman of great honour and standing. Sometimes great sitting. I'm multifaceted that way.

[end voicemail]

[Indie hangs up, then picks up the phone again]

[phone ringing]

Operator: You have two new messages.

[beep]

Indie: Hello again, my single-apparition comet. Because I value transparency in our relationship (which we founded entirely on lies) I'm just calling to let you know that I opened one of the letters. I only did it in the interest of national security, and freedom, and because I really wanted to know what was inside. I haven't read it! But I will. I definitely will. Yours truly, love and light, her first ladyfulness Independence Liberty Day.

[beep]

Indie: Hi Patty! I didn't know you had a little brother. He appears to be in severe mental distress. How cute! Listen, there was a letter in there that you must have forgotten to send. So, because I felt a little guilty about reading it, I posted it for you! No need to pay me back for the stamp. XOXO, Indie.

P.S: Okay, if anyone is tapping this phone call, stop it now. I need to talk to my wife ALONE.

Okay, so you want to hear the real gossip? I heard that Independence Day is voiced by Jenny Wang, Patty is voiced by Monkozia, and Judith the Butler is voiced by N.V. May. Asbestos Le Guin is apparently voiced by Bulk, which is wild. I also heard that Spikes edited this episode! Really scandalous stuff. It could ruin their whole careers if it got out that they were such sick freaks! That's why I'm only telling you, and nobody else. K, love you, bye! 

[kitkat-the-muffin]

For a while I rationalized the existence of the Homestuck Epilogues just cause I like Davekat and I just wanted to accept them being canon even if it also meant accepting tons and tons of character assassination and a terrible storyline

But honestly it’s time I take off the shipping goggles and acknowledge that all of the Epilogues is a mess, including my favorite ship content. They, like everyone else, are out of character and are making decisions that they’d never do

Roxy, who once threw a whole funeral for a cat, would never show disrespect at the death of one of her best friends

Jade would never prioritize invading other peoples relationships when she could be enjoying the company of her family and friends

John would never sit back and accept his fate, whether it be straight up dying or living a life of mundanity, if it meant he’d be miserable with it

Jake would never let people use him for their own gain (again), Dirk would never manipulate people (not after his character arc geez guys), Rose would never give up the chance to fix a problem herself, Kanaya would never leave her wife to suffer alone, Jane would never become the next Condesce, etc, etc.

And despite my rationalization of the Davekat scene through my shipping goggles, I have to admit that Dave would never jump headfirst into both a crush and relationship, especially when you account for his trauma. At the very least, he wouldn’t confess to having a crush without blabbering on about his anxieties first, likely coming out in the middle of a rant on accident (don’t deny it, you know he would) in the same way he accidentally calls Jane “John’s hot grandma.” He’d probably say something like “I’m going through a bisexual crisis, a bi-sis if you will- oh yeah I’m bi by the way, hahah bi-by like bye-bye which is what I should be doing before I embarrass myself further ok bye”

I can see him saying all that ^ more than I can see him downing a ton of alcohol and kissing his crush as if he was in some sort of romcom. Homestuck’s always been really good at deviating from tropes and making the characters feel more like real people, and real people don’t succumb to romcom scenarios. Karkat would smack the romcom out of Dave long before ever succumbing to his own romantic fantasies (It’s like, say you always wanted to be a fairy princess but once you actually turn into one you’re like “uhhh what this is so unrealistic and kind of uncomfortable...” Idk bad example). The point is that no one actually wants to be in a romcom, they just want some of those romantic events like singing songs and having deep emotional conversations, but not suddenly kissing each other after screaming at the fourth wall that’s for sure

Karkat is knowledgable enough in romcoms to know when he’s in one, and you know as hell he won’t give into a cheap narrative like that. Karkat’s never been one to let fate strangle him into submission, he wouldn’t have survived to 6 sweeps on Alternia if he had. Also, he has no interest in politics, not after the whole Gamzee thing anyway, and while I do think Karkat cares a lot for Dave and would want to make him happy, he surely wouldn’t do so by running for President. Karkat’s the kind of person who shows affection with little actions, like drawing with chalk or listening to music. You know, quality time

And I think it’s time that I woke up from my own romcom fantasy and realized that while I want these characters to have a happy ending, this just isn’t them in the first place

I’d like to hear some thoughts from non-davekat shippers on the subject. Nothing anti-davekat I mean, more like some opinions from people who are davekat-indifferent. How did this character development affect readers without red-tinted shipping goggles?

[chronicallylatetotheparty]

Perfect Paradise

(art commissioned from @hekuuu )

"Don't be bemused, it's just the news!

After twenty years of marriage power couple Adrien and Marinette Dupain-Cheng have divorced! Following on the heels of Felix Graham de Vanily's shocking confession has everyone wondering: Is this what drove a wedge between the happiest couple in Paris?"

Ch.1 Tearing at the Seams

Juleka stared at the TV as Nadja's words sank in. That... couldn't be right. Could it?

"... M. And Mme. Dupain-Cheng have three children..."

Oh god, the kids! Juleka felt the unpleasant memory of Jagged's absence when she was growing up sting like a wasp. Sharp and unexpected. Like it always did.

Rose burst in, phone open to the same story playing on the TV. Nadja was one of the few news anchors she trusted not to spread misinformation about their most famous friends.

Still her eyes held disbelief as she looked to her wife. "Juleka? Did you...?"

Juleka shook her head. "He didn't tell me anything." From the way Nadja was saying that they were already divorced Adrien didn't tell anyone.

Pulling out her own phone Juleka called the man whose face was plastered all over the news. Adrien would hate that.

"Hey, it's Adrien! You caught me catnapping but leave a message and I'll get back to you!"

"Adrien! We just saw the news! ...God, I don't know what to say. You didn't-" Juleka took a breath as she cut herself off. Adrien had enough to deal with without her adding to it. "If you need any help. With the kids or whatever just call me. Okay? You're still a member of Kitty Section."

Juleka shot Rose a questioning look who nodded vigorously. "You're still our bandmate even if it's been a while. Okay? We're here for you."

Having said what she needed to Juleka hung up. Hoping her words would remind Adrien that he had people who cared about him. It may be a few years since they were in the same support group but Juleka still remembered him. Just like Adrien still remembered her.

Rose was typing furiously. Probably to Marinette. Adrien may not mind being called but it made Marinette's anxiety spike. And she was busy running Dupain-Cheng Fashions.

"Rose, sweetheart, keep it short." Juleka reminded her as she reached for Rose to sit beside her on the couch.

Her wife's fingers pausing with an "-Oh-" as she sat down hard. "I don't think it's sunk in yet."

"Yeah..." Juleka still remembered how Rose looked the first time she walked on stage wearing a Marinette original. Marinette and Adrien letting Rose hold Louis in her arms as their friends looked on. Adrien's lovesick look that never faded since they were teenagers.

"It doesn't seem real..."

-------------------------------------

"Madame Mayor, what's your response to the people that say Chat Noir shouldn't have-"

"I'm sorry it wasn't me," Mylène interrupted, turning to the next reporter. "Yes?"

"Madame Mayor, the people of Paris want to know if the extradition of Felix Graham de Vanily, also known as Argos, is still a priority?"

"Yes! I've spoken with the President and he assures me that we will continue pressuring the UK government to honor our treaties."

"What about accusations of leniency to one Adrien Agreste?" Asked a reporter from one of those papers that might as well have been a tabloid.

Mylène's eye twitched. "Dupain-Cheng," she corrected.

"Isn't M. Agreste the leading contributor to your campaign?" he continued. "Some people have suggested-"

"If these 'people' have any evidence that Adrien Dupain-Cheng collaborated with Monarch I encourage them to come forward. Otherwise I suggest you refrain from spreading rumors and slander. Thank you, that'll be all."

Mylène was followed by a chorus of "Madame Mayor! Madame Mayor!" as she stepped away from the podium.

Once out of sight she collapsed into a chair. Humming Smelly Wolf to herself to settle the hammering in her chest.

"Water?"

She looked up from the offered water bottle to see her longtime boyfriend smiling gently at her. "Yes, please." Mylène returned the smile as Ivan picked her up before setting her back down in his lap.

One of the few advantages to being a short adult.

"I'm glad you took the time to come," Mylène said as she leaned her head onto his chest.

Ivan shrugged. "Kitty Section is taking a break after the last tour and I know how much you hate these things."

Smiling against his shirt Mylène traced his band's logo. "Have I said I love you today?"

"Love you too," Ivan beamed.

"Ahem."

Reluctantly Mylène turned to her aide. Ignoring the slight reproach in his expression at the Mayor of Paris sitting on her boyfriend's lap. At least it was an improvement from him blushing and avoiding eye contact... She thinks. "Yes, what is it?"

"We might have to go with a different dress for the fundraiser. Depending on how... volatile the situation is with M. Adrien."

Mylène blinked. The dress Marinette donated so she wouldn't stand out among Adrien's snobby rich acquaintances? "Huh?"

Her aide handed her his tablet and Mylène read the headline. "Well... shit."

-------------------------------------

"Max! Oh, Max! Wherefore art thou Max?"

"Ha, ha, Kim. Very funny."

"He lives!" Kim raised his arms as Max came back into view of his webcam.

Alix snorting and Ondine shaking her head fondly in their respective tabs onscreen.

"We were just ironing out the kinks to the new software!" Markov explained as he floated next to Max.

"Hey, Markov."

"Hi, Markov!"

"S'up!"

"Hello, Alix, Kim and Ondine." Markov smiled with his eyes. "It's nice to see you again. Congratulations on your new job Kim!"

"I still say leaving him in charge of kids is a bad idea," Alix piped up.

"Uh-huh. Remind me who out of the both of us has gotten arrested the most?" Kim smirked.

"ACAB!" Alix snapped. Blushing from the fact that she'd been caught more often than Kim rather than anything else.

"ACAB," they chorused. Alix had taken to tagging protest art in very public places after joining Mylène and Ivan's activism. Well, on a more permanent basis than the rest of them.

"Besides," Ondine chimed in, "Kim cares about the sport. He's not gonna let them do anything reckless." She narrowed her eyes. "Right?"

Kim put on his most innocent expression, which wasn't very innocent at all. "Me? Encourage recklessness? I would never!"

Alix snorted.

"Statistically speaking there's an eighty percent chance of Kim encouraging reckless behavior in those he interacts with," Max said.

"Ha!" Alix smirked.

"But, of course, the data is skewed on account of Alix being the main data point."

Kim guffawed while Ondine covered her mouth in a vain attempt to stifle her laughter.

"You're all terrible," Alix announced.

Whatever comeback Kim was going to retort with was interrupted by his phone chiming. "Oh shit."

"What?"

"What is it?"

"Adrien and Marinette are getting divorced."

Alix blinked as her own phone chimed. Sure enough Kim was right.

"Max, you look a little off," Ondine stated.

"Yeah, dude. Aren't you the one always saying that marriage has a fifty percent divorce rate?"

"Certainly reminded me when I got married," Ondine nodded.

"Twice!" Kim elaborated.

"Yes, thank you Kim."

"Well... Yes." Max admitted. "But I always thought those two would beat the odds."

"We all did," Alix nodded. "But life throws you curve balls. Believe me, I didn't expect to spend my last year of collège time traveling."

"Lucky!"

"Kim, she had to repeat a grade."

"Oh yeah."

As his friends went back to bantering amongst themselves Markov started running calculations in his head...

-------------------------------------

"You hear the news?" Marc asked.

"Yeah." Nathaniel continued sketching the next page of their comic. "Hand me that would you?"

Marc gave a chuckle as they handed Nath the ruler. "Chloe's ranting about how she 'always knew this would happen' on Twitter."

"You should really block her," Nathaniel pointed out, still not looking up.

"True," Marc admitted without giving any indication that they would. "So... You don't have anything to say?"

Nathaniel sighed as he straightened up. "I mean, shit, Marc. We don't know anything about what happened. We haven't talked to either of them in over a year. I just... Don't give me that look."

"What look?" Marc asked innocently while giving Nath the Look™.

Nathaniel grumbled as he pulled out his phone.

Marc beaming at him.

-------------------------------------

"One ticket for Paris, please."

"Sure thing! Is that one way?"

"Yes, please."

"... Y'know. You look an awful lot like one of Kitty Section's guitarists."

Luka smiled. "I get that a lot."

-------------------------------------

Kagami downed her glass of Romanee-Conti wine like a shot and then poured herself another.

The news playing in 4K on her Samsung QLED flat screen.

Turning on one of the stools of her personal bar to look at the TV. A picture of Adrien's smiling face staring back at her.

She raised her glass. "To proving me wrong."

-------------------------------------

Nino stared at his phone for a moment before sighing and rising to his feet. "So it's over."

Alya narrowed her eyes as she quickly left money on the table for their coffees. "That broke way too fast. Someone blabbed."

"It was bound to happen sooner or later, dude."

"Preferably later."

Nino nodded. "Yeah. You know where she'll be?"

"The studio, drowning herself in work like always. You?"

"Home," Nino stated simply as their paths split. "He always goes home..."

[milesobrein]

A Love Story (Trump Brackets Part 2)

So I was watching Trump Brackets! They are absolutely great by the way, if you guys haven’t heard about them. Basically all the people watching young Turks vote weekly on the worst things Trump has said, and they get discussed in a short YouTube video. One of the winners of Week 2 was Trump declaring his love for the communist dictator Kim Jong Un, and I felt the had to do a comic about it. If you guys watch these videos, they give a lot more insight about why Trump can’t be president and after watching it, I’m like wow, how is this guy allowed to run?? He’s a rapist, he’s been impeached twice, has bragged about raping people, put his dead wife’s grave in one of his golf courses for a TAX BENEFIT, says he’ll go against the entire constitution, is willing to have people who speak out against him/ his political opponents be locked up, wanted to have the police shoot protestors coming before his speech, only to use tear gas because they told him he couldn’t do that. He of course wants to greatly diminish the rights of Queer Trans people, further stop people from getting abortions, oh yeah, and he’s locking people up in cages at the border, who are coming to the us from war torn countries, conflicts that the US more often than not *caused*. And Trump has been speaking of having police forces be constant presence, who will come and lock people up I belive who have legally immigrated as well as far as I understand. The man is just disgusting. I cannot belive he’s not being locked in a prison cell *right* now. The man who told everyone to drink bleach in the Covid pandemic and brags about sexual assault. I highly recommend checking out Trump Brackets (also known as What’s the Worst Thing Donald Trump has Done?) and spreading the word anyway you can, wether that’s voting, reblogging this post, or telling your friends and neighbors just a handful of these reasons. Again, it’s not too late, and watching this show will give you instant, easy to digest insights on why this man cannot be our president. If anyone still wants, for every person who posts in the comments they will vote for Kamala, or says they donated to her campaign, I will do an art commission. In solidarity, we can be the rebel alliance we see on TV too! 🔥

here’s a link to Part 2 of What’s the Worst Thing Donald Trump has Done, and if you watch all the episodes, you all can see where I got my facts from, and just how terrible this man is! Spread the word if u can!! I would want this Tumblr to just be about fandoms if I could, but I’m so scared for my our future, that I feel like a bad person if I don’t say/ do something. Thank yall again for your support. And we *do* have power. 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🖖🌟🔥

If you would like another video rec I felt really helped me, here’s a link to a previous post that really helped me understand the situation better. (https://www.tumblr.com/milesobrein/765435705855033344/hey-guys-pls-watch-this?source=share)

🔥

[redraven393]

catching up with Philza QSMP Vod. where:

the federation had ruined an old man's front lawn

Rycharlison is adrugdealer

forever took an opportunity and "marries" Philza

immediately met with his wife

the federation send an anarchist an invitation to become a president

Tallulah will rather eat a lime than an avocado or potato

Philza guess Ramon's password

Tallulah's father may or may not be real

Hide and seek in an awesome map Holly shit

the 4th wall has been broken so many times in Philza's Minecraft stream that the admins just let it be broken.

both dad and son thought that the other hid in the same place

the Brazilian are here! :D

there are so many screaming

Tallulah finds him yayyyy

hello Rycharlison

aww there gonna play music

PIG STEPPPP

HESNAMEISPHILZAMINECRAFTANDHEISQUITE OLD-

"my son is DEAD" omg Max

PHILZA OMG u didn't need to describe it

PAYthe SERVER Quackity

Pac and Mike are so cool

BIG LOVE TO MIKE AND PAC

omg Philza is spreading the 4th wall break

the file is so big omg, paper ASMR

"Are you gonna be a president" Sir he is an Anarchist

Max the sound system-the microphone

awww Supportive Philza, opp

Bye MAX

aww the Kids are playing the Guitar

it's nice when the cc are doing lore the admins are still acting like kids

AWWW TALLULAH TEACHING RICHA A SONG THAT WILL TEACH HER

Tallulah BIRTHDAY OMG

yey go stuff that girl with candy

Chayanne is really making plenty of use of his interest in cooking

THE BEES

CATERING LETS GOOO

omg Richa thinks that Will is like Hatsune Miku

Bye guys

is sweet to know that Philza is telling about Will to everyone

OMG Philza the Brazillian magnet

the eggs hear Will's songs too

oh? what do you have Richa

is that a llama

ohhh

omg

Forever is so obsessed with this friend of his omg

HYDRATE BEFORE DIEDRATE

wait the Brazilians are all gone

oh shit

oh no this is like that time with the trio

PARANOIA

Trauma Phil

a Square??

GATINHO and GUAPITO is here

the old man witnesses a shameless PDA

Tallulah is dancing in the background

opp Tallulah not here

the fish is drowning

hey Cellbit

Yay invitations for everyone!!!!

omg

no one believes Wilbur exists

Cellbit nooo

OMG

Chayanne is cooking for the WEDDING

LETS GOOOOO

LET HIM COOK

Cellbit nooo

Cellbit supports Creative Freedom

omg Phil's right Quackity will pull that type of stunt

Cellbit nooo

Richa has never taken a bath wtf???

oh shit he running

yeah show him your dad's picture

omg photoshopped

Forever and Roier is here!!!

omg Forever is gaslighting Holly shit

A Mouth!?

Chayanne is busy planning the catering

Professional Cheft Chayanne LETS GOOOOO

past life Philza omg

Philza is not having it

yeah Richa hit him in the head

your PLAN?????

oh well fair enough

Gaslight vs Guilt trip

omg that is a whole ass restaurant menu

BAGHEERA

yey french

tour pog???

oh shit a BAND??

the band is playing at the WEDDING???

they are so cuteeeeeee

nice home, it sweet that everyone try to make space for the kids in their home

why Cellbit is keeps killing other player

omg Baghera sound so scared that Phill would steal from her the poor lady

nice Megalovania mix it takes me back to 2018

the girls are so talented on music omg

hehe secret

holly shit a bucket full of honey

scary noises

THANKYOU BAHERAA

ohh candy apple

Chayanne professional chef bag

Tallulah is the best

Bagheraa nooo

oh thank god she believe Will is real

Will would have to socialize so much after he came back.

WhOOO THE KIDS FIRST PERFORMANCE

ROCK EGGS

Tallulah is following her old man foot step

bye Bagheraa

oh no the flowers

the Federation building is heighten Phil's property value

ohhh the kids are visiting the build

don't stand on the grass kids

walk on grass anyway

wtf????

what is that???

it is a pretty building

what is going on with the train station??? it was fixed

so they can leave now??

it looks brand new?

fancy train, but bumbpy ride

wat?

AWWW the RACON

aw god no VENUSSS

another venus gone

its okay Tallulah

that is so fuk

oh dragon magic

lol the flies is sitting the trains

lol Chayanne try to catch the bees but got stung

aww Tallulah babby dont be sad

eyy the bois are here

glad they could make Tallulah cheer up

looks like the happy couple happy with the menu

bye boisss

Max is going to get food lmao

it's nice to live near everything but it could also could be dangerous

Tallulah's and will's house really feels like a nice little fantasy corner

yay the kids are now able to get out

sleepy timesss

ohh an album

EGGJOY or RADIO EGG

lol the Wedding photo

Great Album Tallulah

Dragon Story POG

is it Mumza????

you guys will absolutely outlive me

CRY

oh is the Admins asking advice for the Dragon designs???/

if the kids get their wings i hope they also give the bird designed CC wings too

Tallulah pls he's an old man you can't make him run so much

Whooo birthdayyyy

AWWW thank you Tallulah

why is Foolish drowning?

oh god

lol Foolish

omg they were trying to give richa a bath

77777

yeah secur the party old man

kinda sadge

BYE PHIILLL

[fdrsamericanflagduckfloaty]

Drop the Miku Binder TJ rant bestie

okay so like

i was just thinking about it, and, like, i think it's fucking nuts but also really weird how the hamilton fandom (which i'm in but i swear i'm not an uwu lams turtles shipper please) somehow took this CRUSTY, TERF-BANGED, UGLY, OLD, REDHEADED, RAPIST ASS MOTHERFUCKER,

and turned his ugly ass into this.

like damn what the hell- what- how???? okay like yeah, they're using daveed diggs as a base for this bullshit, which, okay, fine, but YOU DID NOT NEED TO ADD THE INFO. The idea itself is funny but also a bit weird, however im 99% sure Diggs himself wore that shirt. However, all of the extra info??? come on. Where'd the fandom get this istg y'all-

Also, also, they did something similar by making John Laurens (gay blonde dumbass) into an UWU turtles boy. ....why. Bi trash coffee gremlin tumblr over-worked sleep-deprived alexander hamilton. like yeah relatable but. why. small bean big sweater uwu innocent boy blushy short james madison. ...why. bro was stubborn and would pick a fight and was the 'fuck you' type of shy.

I just find it wild the fandom made this and it is the entirety of the fandom into one. There's the good sides, there's the bad, and there's this. Which encompasses the ENTIRE. FUCKING. FANDOM.

The fandom has its headcanons, it has its perks, but then you reach the side where everyone is just a wild fucking original character. They don't model the historical figures anymore- they're just OCs with the name 'Philip Hamilton' or 'John Laurens' or god forbid our third U.S president 'Thomas Jefferson' slapped onto it.

I'm also so confused as to how this is what the fandom is known for. We have some good fics, we have hella good art, we have a M U S I C A L , and then the first thought people have of the Ham fandom is Miku Binder Third President Founding Fucker Slaveowner Thomas Jefferson.

I also find it kind of offensive (almost put insluting oh my ufckjg-) that they made a founder become this but like he'd probably be really pissed so please keep fucking up his memory lmao he deserves it

But like... also why. What made them think of this.

Like yeah I write 20k word TR smut but you don't see me drawing it.

You don't see me making him an UWU e-boy.

...Eh I probably would for shits and giggles tbh

But like this is founding father Thomas Jefferson. Third Pres. Second VP. First Sec. of State. And he is a furry, ex-cocaine addict. Also btw do they mean John Laurens or John Adams as the former drug dealer part because neither are better but it'd really help

Also bro literally raped his 14 year old slave and had like 6 kids with her. He had her room DIRECTLY NEXT TO HIS. He RAPED HIS DEAD WIFE'S HALF-SISTER. AND HE'S A SAD UWU MAN WHO DID NOTHING WRONG?

Let's not forget this same person made a post saying Lizzie (the Queen) would be reincarnated as a horse when she died. I'm serious. Deadass.

However, it's also funny as fuck because this entire thing is a tarnish to Jefferson and I fucking HATE that bastard so like good job lol

At the same time though it's still super weird??? But insane??? Because how did this become one of the Tumblr exclusives??? like it's Tumblr history at this point. Twitter history. You cannot express any like for the Hamilton musical before you get the 'have you seen miku binder thomas jefferson' and it's like 'well shit'.

But also remember: THIS IS NOT AN OC TO FUCK AROUND WITH. Hamilton the Musical specifically gave you and presented you the founder. Thomas Jefferson. Played by Daveed Diggs. Just because it is played by a POC, but also modernized, and vastly different from the actual founder and President, does not mean that at its core it is NOT STILL THE SAME PERSON.

If you name it Thomas Jefferson, if you use the presentation of him given by Daveed Diggs, you are still using that white fucking slave-owning racist motherfucker, and that's the point of it all.

I find it stupid but funny but also insane, and I wouldn't care, unless I KNEW IT WAS SERIOUS. The artist made it seriously. They made John Laurens. They made Philip Hamilton. They did this seriously.

but like also look at this lmao

This meme of Thomas Jefferson in a Hatsune Miku binder really got trending on Twitter at one point

It's an infamous, hellish, classic meme of both Tumblr and the Hamilton fandom, and it deserves what attention it's got, but Jesus please never unironically make shit like this again, Hamilfans, we're stained by this we don't need another😭🔫

EDIT:

i have more

So like, I just remembered: it kinda romanticizes these guys??? The musical??? so like don't get me wrong i love the music but... it puts them into this light. This pink light. It paints Hamilton as an abolitionist who was outspoken about it. When, in reality, dude traded and sold slaves for his in-laws + wasn't all that outspoken about it + was against immigrants or migrants, WHEN DUDE WAS FROM THE ISLANDS. HE HAD SCOTTISH BLOOD. AND HE'S AGAINST IT? Hypocrisy at its finest.

Washington also owned slaves and ran his own plantation too, so he's not off the hook. Madison, the 'uwu small bean' of the fandom, also owned slaves and ran a plantation. So the main people of this entire fiasco are slave-owners. Perfect. But also I've heard Ron Chernow's book on Hamilton, the entire start of the musical, is a bit biased to Ham himself, so...

You could be saying 'but FDRsduckfloaty, Sally is mentioned!' yes. But however, not enough. Not more. It's not even implied more than potentially ONCE what he did, and I'm not sure it ever was! Cabinet battle 3 states it flat-out but it was cut. For your info, Ben Franklin and John Adams are the only two you can really like in the slavery aspect. Ben bought them but let them go for their freedom, and John detested slavery and was against it. Never owned one.

Jefferson did add a slavery clause to the declaration but it was discarded, and he didn't fight half as much as he could have. Maybe he did and since it was the 1700s he didn't have a lot of support, but surely he could've done something like, I don't know, call it out after his terms? Once you're done gaining your second term and out of office, they can't do shit to it or your presidency, since it's over.

So the musical itself has its own problem and the fandom is even worse. It blatantly disregards that a LOT. A hella lot of the amrev fandom + a small part of the ham fandom has called TJeffs out for it but I mean can we please not make shit like Miku Binder Jefferson and act like he wasn't an actual child rapist???

This video does pretty well at it. I will admit the tagline 'America then, told by America now' almost sends shivers down my spine for what it really means. But then again I find men not knowing they'd make it down into the history books for starting the world's global power and the world's economic powerhouse pretty interesting. Doing something big and knowing it's historical, but not that it's going to form a very, VERY large country, where you'll be honored down the road and called a Founding Father of an entire nation? Signing papers and not knowing they're the founding stones of a country and still looked up to today? Intriguing.

But like still fuck Thomas Jefferson lmao

there's a lot more videos on it that dig deep, but the point is, that Hamilton is a good musical with good songs but it's also very... complex, and a bit problematic, Thomas Jefferson is a little bitch, and you should stan 1776 before you ever stan Hamilton. 1776 does not do this. It is much more realistic. 1776 has Benjamin Franklin and that's an immediate win. Be more like a 1776, be less like a Hamilton.

[catindabag]

TBOSAS on Crack short take (39)

Vipsania: I��m bored.

Urban: Me too.

Livia: I told you losers that we should go shoe shopping instead.

Felix: For the last time, Cardew, we can’t go out and do fun stuff while in detention.

Livia: Detention?! I’m in detention?! Since when-

Coryo: Since yesterday, dummy.

Festus: Liv, you do remember that we almost destroyed the school kitchen yesterday, right?

Livia: Nope. Never. I don’t know anything about that incident-

Coryo: You were literally the one who left the stove on fire while the rest of us were trying to stop Palmyra from cooking.

Livia: Oh, shut up, orphan! I wasn’t even talking to you.

Coryo: Well, whatever, banker. Your scary mama can’t save your sorry ass this time.

Livia: Ha! At least I have a mom to spoil me rotten, Snow.

Coryo: You think you’re better than me because of your stupid money?!

Livia: Of course I’m better-

Coryo: Your mom can’t even defeat my super gorgeous dad in a stupid pageant beauty contest back in their University days!

Lysistrata: Yeah! Crassus Snow even won it seven times in a row!

Livia: How did you even know that?!

Coryo: ‘Cuz I still have my dad’s pageant crowns and sashes!

Felix: And I have the pictures to prove them!

Lysistrata: My mom was a runner up.

Coryo: Oh, and my dad even won the women’s category-

Livia: Ugh! Fine! Your drop dead gorgeous father may have been the most beautiful creature in Panem-

Coryo: Of course he is!

Livia: But he still dated Drunk Dean Casca Highbottom and that scheming Strabo Plinth from District 2!

Sejanus: The ever gorgeous Crassus Xanthos Snow once dated my evil old man?!

Livia: Yup! My mama even told me that Crassus almost married into the Plinth family for money-

Coryo: Shut up, Cardew!

Livia: You started it!

Florus: *raises hand* Why don’t we just play a game instead!

Androcles: A game?

Palmyra: Sure! I wanna play a game.

Apollo: Me too!

Diana: Can we play battleships?

Everyone: No!

Diana: Why?🥺

Apollo: Sis, do you even remember that other infamous flooding incident that occurred last semester?

Diana: Is it that time where we had to call the ambulance because Gaius and Florus broke both of their legs from jumping ship?

Florus: Actual ships.

Gaius: With actual missiles.

Apollo: Yes, that.

Diana: Nope. I don’t remember.

Iphigenia: Can’t we just play the “Would You Rather” game?

Lysistrata: Ok. Yo, Coryo, would you rather marry Casca Highbottom for fame or marry Strabo Plinth for money?

Coryo: Easy. Strabo Plinth. No questions asked-

Sejanus: What about me, my love?!

Coryo: Sej, Babe, you were not even an option.

Sejanus: But you’re still going to marry me, right?🥺

Coryo: For the last time, Sejanus Plinth, you’re the only rich idiot that I’m willing to marry and have children with.

Sejanus: Oh, thank Panem! That’s good to hear, my love! So would you rather kiss me now or later?😘

Coryo: That’s not how you play this game, Babe!

Sejanus: But I want a kiss-

Coryo: Felix, I give the stage to you.

Felix: Ok. Dennis, would you rather date one of my wealthy but shady cousins or marry someone from the outer Districts?

Dennis: Which District?

Felix: 10?

Dennis: A strong wife from District 10 it is.

Juno: My turn! Hilarius, would you rather disown your creepy father and become homeless or give him Coryo and Felix in order to inherit the rest of the Heavensbee wealth?

Hilarius: What the heck, Juno! What kind of cruel options are those?!

Juno: Just answer my freaking question, Hilari!

Hilarius: Fine! The second one!

Coryo: What the heck, you traitor!

Felix: Seriously, Hilari?! You’re willing to sacrifice me and Coryo for money?!

Hilarius: Never! I would never ever do that to you, Class Pres!

Livia: Well, good luck being poor and homeless, Hilari.

Arachne: May the odds be forever in your favor, Heavensbee.

Domitia: My turn! Arachne, would you rather burn all of your inheritance for the “Sandwich Queen” title or watch Festus Creed become the official “Sandwich Queen of Panem” for the presidency?

Arachne: Well, if I do become the President of Panem, then I would have the power to get rid of Festus-

Festus: Hey!😠

Arachne: But burning my inheritance for the title is also doable.

Domitia: How?

Arachne: ‘Cuz I’ll just steal my older brother’s money.

Festus: Oh, this heartless witch-

Clemensia: My turn! Persephone, would you rather eat Palmyra’s infamous deadly apple pies for eternal fame or volunteer as a Tribute for the Hunger Games?

Persephone: The second option.

Clemensia: Really? You would rather become a Tribute just to avoid eating one deadly pie?

Persephone: Yeah, sure. Why not. I literally have better odds of winning and surviving the Hunger Games than eating one of Monty’s rebel-killer sweets.

Everyone: True.😞

Io: My turn! Urban, would you rather fail our calculus class in order to gain political power and influence or replace Dr. Gaul as the Head Game Maker for political power and influence?

Urban: Those options are actually difficult to answer, Jasper.

Io: Just take your pick!

Urban: Fine! I do love calculus more than anything in this world. So-

Io: Head Gamemaker Urban Canville it is?

Urban: Yeah.

Apollo: My turn! Andie, would you rather steal Dr. Gaul’s monster bunny for illegal money or marry into the very corrupt and chaotic Ravinstill family?

Androcles: Both.

Everyone: Really?!

Androcles: Yeah. Im willing to steal Dr. Gaul’s evil bunny and marry Ravinstill at the same time.

Felix: Which Ravinstill are we talking about?

Androcles: Oh, you tell me, Class Pres.😏

Diana: My turn! Sejanus, would you rather challenge Coryo’s evil grandmother to an epic drinking contest just to win Coryo’s hand in marriage or push Highbottom-

Sejanus: Push Highbottom!

Diana: I’m not even done yet!

Sejanus: No need to worry, Ring. I’m willing to push Highbottom for Coryo.😀

Diana: Let me finish-

Sejanus: No! Pushing Highbottom is the only right answer!

Casca: *walks in* Pushing who?

Coryo: No one, Sir. Sejanus is just shouting at the sky again.

Casca: Oh, ok.

Diana: Well, bye-

Casca: By the way, who told you to play the “Would You Rather” game without my consent, Crassus Snow?

Coryo: It’s Coriolan-

Casca: Crassus Xanthos Snow! My love, how dare you play these silly games without me?!😭🔪

Felix: *sighs* Dean Highbottom’s drunk again.

Sejanus: So can I push him now?😀

Coryo: Sure. Go ahead. I might even kiss you.

Sejanus: Can you kiss me now?

Coryo: No.

[angelsdevils]

Baji Keisuke

Title: Baby Project Fluff A/N: This was so random, and I needed to get it out. No idea if there will be a part 2 or not. But this was exactly what the doctor ordered.

Word Count: 3K

Tag List: @shelly-ya @y00nse0 @thisbiccbicc @haitani-bruv @galactict3a @katariinasworld

You and Baji stared at each other then at the doll baby in your arms. Your school was going a new route with teaching sex education and how to care for a baby. You and Baji were paired up, such an unlikely couple since you both were complete opposites. He got held back a year, a delinquent or at least that’s what the rumors said. You were an honor student, class president, and a volunteer. 

“This… is a thing? In America?” He asked, and you nodded your head. 

“Yeah.”

“So… now that you guys have your babies and your significant others. Remember, you both have to take care of it. The baby requires love from both parents, and I will know if you neglect the child. Class dismissed.” 

Everyone filed out of the classroom, except you and Baji.

“We should name it…” you said.

“How about Flying Hawk?” 

“Absolutely not, what kind of name is that?” You scolded and he shrugged.

You thought for a moment, before smiling.

“Since it’s a girl, how about we choose (female name)?” 

“Sure…” Baji took the baby from you but the baby started to cry and scream. The sudden crying had him almost dropping the baby but you caught it.

“Idiot, you almost dropped her.” You scolded and bounced her gently, and her cries started to stop.

“The crying shocked me, I didn’t mean to.” 

You sighed softly before looking at Baji.

“You never held a baby have you?” 

“No…” 

“Come on, luckily I have. I can teach you, what are you doing after school?” 

“Nothing besides going to my friend’s brother’s shop.”

“Okay, well I guess I am tagging along.”

“Okay,” Baji said with a smile and he grabbed your backpack while you carried the baby. The baby started to cry again and you stopped before reaching into the diaper bag and grabbed a fake bottle. You held it to the doll baby’s lips and it stopped crying.

“You are really good at this.”

“I have a baby sister, she is a year old now. I had a lot of practice.” He nodded and watched you before looking ahead, this whole concept was weird since he didn’t see himself ever having kids or a family.”

The walk to the shop was short, and he held the door over.”

“Hey Baji- who is that?” A guy with blonde hair asked, he stared at you and you realized that the rumors about Baji were probably true. You stepped behind him still carrying the baby. 

“Oh this is (L/N), she is my wife for a -”

Suddenly the baby started to cry really loudly, catching everyone’s attention.

“She has a kid?” You started to bounce the doll while patting it’s back.

“Our kid…” 

It was dead silent, before everyone yelled, you suddenly realized what they were thinking and you turned ten shades red. The baby started to cry harder and you started to pace back and forth.

“You guys are making it cry by being loud…” Baji scolded and you were relieved he picked up on the distressed doll’s wails. 

“You got some girl knocked up?” A tall guy came over who was wiping his hands with a towel and pinched Baji’s ear hard.

“At least he is helping her take care of it.” 

“What are you talking about?! OWE LET GO!” Baji yelled, trying to get out of Shinichiro’s hold. 

“Shhhh…” You shot him a glare and he covered his mouth, and you started to sing a small lullaby under your breath. Baji swapped at Shinichiro before rushing to you and using his index finger to rub the stomach. The baby eventually stopped crying and fell asleep and you sighed.

“Be quiet, the baby is sleeping,” Baji said quietly.

“I repeat, you knocked some girl up? You haven’t even graduated.”

“What are you talking about?” Baji once again asked.

You leaned close to his ear, and whispered.

“They think you got me pregnant, they think the baby is real…” You said it really quiet, so the recording in the baby wouldn’t pick up on it.

“Oh… uh, I will be back, gotta explain before Shinichiro unalives me…” 

You nodded and stood awkwardly in the doorway while he pushed his friend and the guy you came to realize was Shinichiro away from the baby.

“It’s a project, it’s a baby doll that has all the qualities of a real baby…” 

“Oh… so not a real baby?” Mikey asked and he shook his head.

“No… god what do you take me for?” He huffed and Shinichiro had his hand placed on his chest. 

“You should have given us more context, you are a troublemaker, so I didn’t know what to think,” Shinichiro said.

Baji huffed before going by your side before looking at Mikey.

“Anyway, she will be with me a lot for the next few weeks. So, don’t weird her out.”

“You are the one to weird her out,” Draken said.

“Not true,”

“Or get her into trouble,” Mitsuya said next. 

You tensed up at the thought of getting into trouble and he quickly looked at you.

“Don’t listen to them, I won’t do anything to cause you to get into trouble or fail the test. My word.” 

“I hope not…” You mumbled and he flashed you a smile, before removing his bulky glasses and looking at his friends. You blinked realizing you never saw him without them, but you didn’t stare too long as you felt a wetness on your hand. 

“I need a changing table,” you said.

“Why?” 

“The baby peed.” 

Baji made a face, and the others started to snicker.Shinichiro motioned you to a clean table in the back.

“You can change the baby back here, it’s clean.”

“Thank you, Baji-kun, get in here.”

“But, it’s a girl.”

“She is your daughter, you are gonna need to learn how to change her.”

“But-”

“Baji Keisuke…”

“Okay, okay…”

Baji went to the room while everyone was laughing at him. 

“Well wouldn’t they make a cute couple? She already has the reins on him, like a true wife,” Wakasa said. 

“This is gonna be an interesting few weeks,” Shinichiro said. 

You taught Baji how to change the diaper, and with many protests, he finally got it right. You then taught him how to properly hold the baby. He looked down at the doll and even though it was fake he felt a small sense of pride while holding the baby. 

You noticed a faint smile on his face, and you couldn’t help but smile as well. Many people had bad impressions of him, but after seeing the way he was gentle with a baby doll, you had to shut those previous thoughts down. 

“Are you two done?” 

“Shh… they are having a moment…”

You and Baji looked at the small audience, which happened to be his friends peering behind the door. You both looked at each other again and you went to take the baby from him but he moved it out of your way.

“No…” 

“Wha~”

“Baji we have a meeting… let’s go, she can hang out with Emma and Hinata,” MIkey said.

“Okay, let’s go.” 

“Give me the baby back,”

“No…” 

“But-”

“So, Baji, how do you plan to ride your motorcycle with a baby in your hand?” Draken asked

“Uhm, I'm not. I am just gonna carry her. Walking to the shrine with my wife.” 

You smacked him upside his head, and he whined. 

“Ow, what was that for?”

“Don’t say it like that!”

“Shh… gonna make the baby cry…” Baji was now scolding you. 

Your mouth dropped open, and a lot more laughs could be heard. You wanted to say something, but nothing came out. Your cheeks blazed red, and embarrassment sunk in.

The other’s shrugged and walked out.

“We will see you there, nice meeting you (Y/N) even though Baji forgot to introduce us to you.” 

“Uh… nice meeting you too,” you mumbled.

They left, and Baji grabbed your hand pulling you out of the shop. You looked behind you confused, and Shinichiro winked at you with a grin. You turned back around to look at Baji and he had a grin on his face.

“What’s with the grin?”

“Nothing, you don’t mind going to the meeting right? Also, who is the baby going home with?” 

“I don’t mind, but is it… like a gang?” You asked hesitantly. He stopped walking and looked over at you, and nodded his head.

“Yes, I am part of a gang, and it is a gang meeting. But don’t worry you won’t get into any type of trouble… crap, I need to change too. To my home first.”

“I don’t know if I should go…”

“It’s fine, I promise.” 

“Okay, and we can take turns with the baby… spending the night,” you whispered. 

“Sweet okay,” you both walked up his stairs and he walked into his apartment with the baby still.

“Welcome home Kei, oh? What’s this?” A beautiful older lady came out of the kitchen to see you behind Baji, and Baji was holding a baby doll.

“We are doing a school project of taking care of a baby, she is my wife…” 

“I-Idiot, don’t say it like that. I told you already,” you looked away and she chuckled.

“Well, we are married. We are not doing that family that is split and one person taking care of a baby. I watched mom do it alone, no way am I doing it alone and neither are you. So suck it up, you are my wife…” 

For the umpteenth time that day he said something that shocked you. His mom was giggling non stop, actually quite proud of her son.

“Mom, meet your granddaughter, her name is (daughter’s name).” He handed it to his mom and she gently held the baby doll as if it was real. 

“I will be back, gotta change.” He rushed to his room, and you stood there by yourself.

“Don’t mind him, I am surprised though with how serious he is about this project,” his mom said. 

“What do you mean?” You tilted your head, and she smiled.

“The only thing he really takes seriously is fighting and hanging out with friends. He finally started working in school.”

“Well if it makes you feel better he already introduced me to his friends as his wife. So…” You said and she chuckled.

“I see, be careful, he may end up getting attached to you.” She winked as she started to rock the baby when it started to cry, and it stopped almost immediately. You blinked tilting your head to the side, before she continued to talk. 

“Your name is (L/N) (Y/N) right?” She asked and you blinked.

“Uh, yes ma’am, how did you know?”

“Kei had this look on his face when he came in, he always talks about you. So when he walked in and I saw you behind him and the look on his face. I knew it was you instantly.”

“W-Wait, what does he say about me?”

“Okay, I am done…” Baji came out in his gang uniform, and his mom handed you the baby back, but he quickly took the baby back.

“I wanna carry the baby,” he said with a grin. 

“Uhm, it’s my turn to carry the baby plus you have that meeting.” 

“It’s fine, I got it. Let’s go, before I am late.” 

You both left and his mom waved before grinning and going back into the kitchen. You looked back at Keisuke and he was looking at the doll baby with a wide smile.

“You okay Baji-kun?”

“Of course, why do you ask?” He turned to look at you, and you noticed his little fang poking out. He was actually more adorable than you imagined with the way he acted. You looked away shaking your head.

“No reason…”

He blinked confused before shrugging his shoulders.

“So what were you and mom talking about?” 

The conversation went back to what she said and your face had heated up.

“Nothing much, just the assignment.”

“Oh good, I was worried she said something embarrassing.”

She did, what could you have possibly said to her about me?

That is what you wanted to ask him, but chose to keep quiet. It was a quiet walk to the Shrine, and when you both arrived you were about to take the baby but Baji moved it away from you.

“Baji give me the baby…”

“No, I said I got it.”

“You are not taking the baby to a gang meeting…”

“It’s fine.”

“No…”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“What are you two arguing about?” a girl with blonde hair walked up and Baji waved.

“Hey Emma, (L/N) trying to take the baby from me.”

“Well, give it to her.”

“No,”

“Baji, even if it’s an assignment you can’t take a baby to a gang meeting,” the guy you come to know as Mitsuya said.

“I am taking it with me. Blah. Blah. Blah. Meeting is starting.”

He walked away carrying the baby and you face palmed.

“My name is Emma, this is Hinata,” Emma said.

“Hi, I am (L/N) (Y/N)...”

“So, your school is doing the baby assignment?” Hinata asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, I never talked to Baji before today either. I am surprised,” you admitted.

“That’s fair, let's go sit down and talk,” Emma said. 

You smiled and followed her and you guys were laughing and talking the entire time. Suddenly, the baby started to cry and you sighed softly.

“Shut the baby up!” 

“SHUT UP WHO SAID THAT!”

The baby continued to wail loudly, and Mikey looked at you pleadingly because the meeting wasn’t even over yet. You walked up the stairs to Baji and everyone watched. He held the baby away from you. 

“Give me the baby.”

“No.”

“The baby is crying.”

“I can deal with it.”

You exhaled slowly, and Draken came to your rescue.

“Uh, sometimes the babies just want their mother… so maybe it will stop crying if you hand it to her…”

“But…” 

“Just give me the baby, Mikey is trying to hold a meeting.”

“Fine…” He huffed, and he gave you the baby in which it stopped crying. You gave Mikey an apologetic smile before walking down the stairs and the baby started to cry again. You froze, before giving it the bottle, which the baby did not want. You checked the diaper and it was dry. You pat it’s back no luck, rocking it and nothing. Baji came close to you, and it stopped crying. 

There was some laughing that could be heard, and you realized the baby wanted you both together.

“That is one advanced baby…” someone muttered and you sighed softly. 

“Okay, Baji (L/N) sit there…” Mikey said and you both nodded. It was embarrassing being in front of god knows how many guys but you had no choice. It didn’t seem to bother Baji any with the tons of stares, he was busy looking between you and the baby. The baby because he began to wonder what it would be like to have his own little munchkin, and then you wondered what it would be like if you were the mother of the said munchkin. He zoned out the rest of the meeting, just admiring you and the doll. 

Everyone stared at Baji, instantly recognizing the look on his face.

So that’s who he is in love with, makes sense.

They all thought in unison.

Mikey ended the meeting and you stood up, walking down the stairs with Baji, he looked dejected when he tried to take the baby.

“Stop that…” You said and he huffed. 

“Fine, but I get the first night with the baby.” 

You raised an eyebrow and grinned slightly.

“Alright, then I get tomorrow.” 

“Wait, you two won’t be staying together?” Mikey asked and you blinked.

“Why would we? We live in separate houses.” 

Draken spoke up next, knowing what Mikey was doing. 

“Baji, didn’t you say she was your wifey? Husbands and wives don’t live in separate houses.”

“Yeah, I agree.” Mitsuya piped in.

Baji had a hand on his chin and was about to talk, but you shut it down really fast.

“No way my parents would allow us to have sleepovers. He is a boy, I am a girl. Both teenagers, no way. My parents wouldn’t allow it,” you said. 

“Let me talk to them, and my mom! It could work, they have a point.” 

“Baji, no.” 

You smacked him on his head, and he puffed his cheeks. You rolled your eyes huffing slightly, and started to walk away to go home, but Baji ran up to you.

“Let me walk you home… It's dangerous at night.” 

“Fine…” 

He grabbed your bag, and the diaper bag before walking away. 

“(L/N)?”

“Yes?”

“Random question, but what is your dream? Do you want a family?” Baji asked.

“Huh, that is random… but I guess so. One day, a husband, maybe 2 kids, that’s it. And a cute little house.” 

Baji nodded his head with a grin, he was determined now. 

“Why do you ask?”

“No reason, this project just spiked the question. I heard some of the class don’t want families.” 

“Ah, I see. And you?” 

“I do, I want to be a father that's there for his kids unlike my dad who left my mom behind. I want to prove I can be a better man than him.” 

“That’s actually admirable, Baji-kun.” 

You both fell silent again, until you got to your house and he took the baby from you. 

“I still-”

“No…” 

“Fine, see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah~ good night Baji-kun, get home safe. Don’t let anything happen to the baby.”

“You can trust me, I promise.” 

“You remember how to make the bottle? Change the diaper?” 

“Yes, yes… I remember plus my mom will be with me. I can ask her for help. Don’t worry.” 

“Okay…” You were hesitant, before giving Baji your phone number.

“Text me if something happens.”

“I feel how confident you are for me, thanks,” he mumbled. He took the paper and placed the number in his phone before leaving.

© [@angelsdevils] all rights reserved. None of my posts or stories should be changed, reposted, etc. I do not own the character or the fanart, but I own the plots of these stories. All fanart goes to their appropriate owners.

[aeoki]

Seven Bridges - Love and Peace?: Chapter 1

Location: Yumenosaki Student Council Room Characters: Ritsu, Mao & Hitsugi

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ< At that time. Yumenosaki Academy, Student Council Room. >

Ritsu: An idol training school of long-standing tradition and achievements to its name: Yumenosaki Academy…

I am the one with the most authority here – the student council president, Ritsu Sakuma.

Today, I have extremely unfortunate news for you all.

Mao: Hey, what’re you doing, Ritsu? Where did you come from? Don’t just sit in the student council president's chair just because you want to.

Ritsu: What’s Maa-kun’s is mine and what’s mine is Maa-kun’s. We’re a couple who shares things between us and love one another.

Mao: I don’t understand. Anyway, if a new student walks in, they’re going to get the wrong idea, so can you not?

Ritsu: It’s not the wrong idea! We’re in love with each other…!

Mao: That’s not what I’m talking about. Don’t call yourself the student council president – they’ll think they hopped into the wrong timeline or something.

Ritsu: What’s a timeline? Can you not use those nerdy manga words?

Mao: I’m not a manga nerd! I just like manga as much as everyone else!

Ritsu: That’s what they all say.

Hitsugi: Hello~? Hello, hello~? Excuse me for interrupting!

Mao: Oh? I see you’re here, Anzu – Sorry for asking you to come all the way here.

Ritsu: Anzu…? It’s been a while since I last saw you but it feels like you’ve changed?

Hitsugi: ……? ……?

Really? I can’t tell!

Ritsu: No, I’m not talking about you.

Mao: Yeah. He’s not Anzu, but uhh, he’s someone from the “producer course” that’s been with Anzu a lot recently. I dunno the details though.

Err, you’re Kurone, right?

Hitsugi: Yes! I’m Hitsugi Kurone, a second-year student in the “producer course”!

I wanted to fulfil my heart’s desire and get Anzu-senpai to pay attention to me and she told me, “You can come if you’d like” so…

I followed with my heart racing! I’m so happy!

Ritsu: …………

Mao: Hm? What’re you doing, Ritsu? Why’re you crawling under the desk…?

Ritsu: I don’t know who this kid is, but I don’t want to get involved with someone other than Anzu from the “producer course”.

Mao: ……?

Hitsugi: Woah! That’s useful knowledge! It’s proper manners to talk under the desk in the student council room, huh! Like this? Is this what I should do?

Ritsu: Can you stay away from me?

Look, Maa-kun gets jealous whenever he sees me chatting with someone else, you know…? ♪

Hitsugi: Whaa~! That’s so passionate! Looks like those rumours were true!

Ritsu: What rumours? Is someone gossiping about our relationship? Tell me the details.

Hitsugi: You told me to stay away so it’ll be hard to have a conversation!

Ritsu: I didn’t tell you not to talk to me.

Mao: ……? I don’t really get it, but oh well. The sun will set if I keep complaining about how strange they’re acting. That’s the first lesson I’ve learnt after becoming the new student council president of Yumenosaki.

Anyway, don’t be shy and come in, Anzu.

I’ll say this over and over again, but I’m really sorry – I called you over despite knowing you were busy.

It’s also pretty complicated to talk about it on “Hallhands”. I prefer talking in person when it comes to things like this.

…Up until last year, if I had something I needed to talk to you about, I could’ve just gone over to the classroom next door.

But it’s a new year and our positions have changed too – It feels like there’s a weird bit of space between us.

“Sorry”, you say? No, there’s no need for you to apologise at all~

Haha. Looks like that part of you hasn’t changed. I’m kinda relieved…♪

Hitsugi: Affair! It’s an affair, Ricchan-san! Your wife is batting his eyelashes at another woman!

Ritsu: What’re you doing? You’re my wife! Don’t you have any sense of ethics!?

Mao: The onlookers sure are noisy… Sorry, things are kinda uneasy, Anzu.

Sit over there. I’ve got something important I need to tell you.

Hitsugi: Is he gonna propose? Is he gonna propose?

Ritsu: Guh, and to think Anzu would beat me to the punch… I was careless because I was satisfied with what I had – Ricchan will reflect on this.

Hitsugi: You haven’t lost yet! You can totally make a comeback! Don’t give up, Ricchan-san!

Ritsu: You’re right! I won’t give up – I’ll muster the courage to confess…!

Mao: Guys, if you really don’t have anything better to do, could you guys just go home…?

Well, I guess I don’t mind. Being surrounded by chaos and noise is what Yumenosaki is all about.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ← Previous Chapter ᠂ ⚘ ˚⊹˚ ⚘ ᠂  Next Chapter →

[rodanhoax]

Scarlet: I got a latte order for Jaune?

Jaune: That's me. Thank you.

Scarlet: Wait... Jaune, is that you?!

Jaune: Excuse me?

Scarlet: Remember me?

Scarlet: Spanish class?

Jaune: I-I'm sorry...

Scarlet: C'mon. Shade Academy, we sat right next to each other.

Jaune: I'm still drawing a blank here.

Scarlet: We even played Lacrosse together.

Jaune: I know nothing about Lacrosse.

Scarlet: We were great buddies!

Jaune: Look, I'm sorry. I'm running kinda late here.

Scarlet: You were like the most popular kid in school.

Jaune: I... I was?

Scarlet: Yeah, you were class president! Everyone loved you. All the girls had a secret crush on you.

Jaune: T-they did?

Scarlet: Yeah, so did I.

Jaune: ... What?

Scarlet: When I finally came out to everyone, you were the only one that supported me. You gave me the courage to finally open up to my parents and allow them to love me for who I really am.

Scarlet: And you didn't just help me, you've done great things for all of Vacuo. You redirected the lives of troubled kids by showing them that gang violence isn't the way.

Jaune: I... I did?

Scarlet: You were an inspiration to us all.

Jaune: *Scratches head in disbelief*

Scarlet: It's probably hard for you to remember. Doctors weren't sure if you'd ever get your memory back from that incident.

Jaune: Wait... What incident?

Scarlet: When you saved those orphans from a burning church, a chunk of debris fell on your head. You were in a coma for 9 months.

Jaune: I-I was?

Scarlet: It was the bravest thing I ever saw.

Jaune: O-oh, well... Thank you.

Scarlet: *Places hand upon Jaune cheek* I understand you can't remember right now... But I'll never forget the last words you said to me before you ran into that building.

Jaune: What did I say?

Scarlet: You said "Puedo perder mi vida, pero la esperanza…"

(Translation: I may lose my life, but hope...)

Scarlet + Jaune: "La esperanza es lo último que perderé."

(Translation: Hope is the last thing I'll lose)

Jaune: Y'know... I-I think I'm starting to remember now!

Scarlet: Well, it's good to have you back, Jaune.

Jaune: Well, it's good to be back.

Scarlet: *Hands him his latte, but stops as he see's the name written on it* Wait... It's Jaune with an AU?

Jaune: Yeah?

Scarlet: Oh, I think I mistaken you for someone else. My bad. Here's your latte, have a nice day. *Gives him his drink before immediately going back to work*

Jaune: B-but wait-

Scarlet: I got an order for Flynt?

Scarlet: Flynt? I-Is that you?!

Flynt: Do I know you?

Scarlet: You saved my wife from a grizzly bear attack!

[sinclxirx]

New Opportunities

Characters: Sonya Ryan, John Clark, Domingo Chavez, Gerry Hendley, Aurelia Arnot, Dr. Harishva „Harry“ Pandey, Eliza "Ash" Cohen, Jordan Trace, mention of Jack Ryan Sr., Jack Ryan Jr., Dominic Caruso and Bartosz "Barry" Jankowski aka Midas

Warnings: mention of death by fire, anxiety, mention of torture, scars

AN: biggest thank you to @scentedcandleibex 💜 I couldn't have done it without you

picture credit to the rightful owners

Sonya wasn‘t expecting much this Sunday morning as she walked through the empty corridors of her workplace. The Campus, was an “off the books” intelligence organization and private military company that was established by her father, Jack Ryan Sr., back in 2001 when he was the president of The United States.

As Sonya walked into the office, she realized that this Sunday morning, the office was pretty full, as everyone had the weekend off, due to their last mission in South Korea. Sonya and her twin brother, Jack Ryan, decided to stay up that night and work on some stuff that had been overdue. That morning, they both realized they needed some papers that were in the office. Sonya decides that she will be the one to get the papers, and get some breakfast for her and her brother, Jack, while she is out. Sonya was more than happy to get some fresh waffles from one of her favorite bakeries, along with getting some good tea.

Sonya now sees a random man and woman standing and hanging out in front of her boss’ office. The woman looked to be in her early thirties and had long red hair and sunglasses. The man had short hair and glasses that looked to be out of some sort of Steampunk book or movie. And he was HOT. Sonya could feel herself growing uncomfortable at these thoughts. It was at this moment that Sonya realized that she never put any make-up on today, the scars and runes on her face being more noticeable (though even with make-up, Sonya’s scars and rune would be noticeable given how deep they are), Sonya cursed to herself at her sudden realization. Sonya’s scars were daily reminders of how she was not able to save her late husband from his terrible and tragic fate. Sonya walks to her computer, nodding to the man and woman, greeting the two. The man and woman looked unfazed at Sonya’s appearance, the two nodding back.

While looking for the documents that Sonya and her brother needed, she could sense the red haired woman studying her. Despite the red-haired woman’s shades, her gaze was intense. “Can I help you with something, ma’am?” Sonya questions. The shaded red-haired woman tilts her head to the side. “Yeah… sure.” The woman then takes a short breath. “You’re Sonya Ryan, right?” The man’s head turns towards the red-haired woman, a mix of shock and confusion written on his face. “Oh no…” Sonya mumbles to herself, surprised that anyone in the office this Sunday morning actually knew her name. The red-haired woman nodded to the man that was standing beside her, and knocked on the door that they were standing in front of, opening it. Sonya could hear their voices fading as the man and woman entered the room. After a few moments, Sonya leaves the room.

As Sonya continued to look for the files that her and her twin needed, Jon Clark stepped into the room. The female Ryan twin looking at him confused. John Clark had told her that he was going to take the weekend off and do something with his wife since he doesn’t get to spend too much time with her anymore. He was so serious about spending time with his wife, but yet he was there at the office.

“Hey, John, is everything alright? Why are you here?” Sonya’s voice was full of concern as the questions left her lips. “I could ask you the same question! It’s a Sunday, but yet you’re here at the office.” John questions back towards Sonya. Sonya scratches her head. “Umm… yeah… so…” Sonya stammers. “Me and Jack are trying to fish up some things…” This causes Clark to sigh loudly and shake his head. “Sonya, please, it’s Sunday, I told you and your brother to take a break.” The older man speaks as he walks towards her. “And now here you are, at your desk, searching for some folders.” Clark’s words cause Sonya to think for a moment. Maybe she did need a break. Especially after all of the long missions that she’s been on over a short period of time. The first mission was in China, the next mission was in South America, the last one being in Serbia. This life wasn’t easy and was far from being safe. One of her teammates had gotten shot during the mission in South America and almost died in the middle of the jungle. Sonya thought about everything for a moment, when she remembered about the two strangers whom she had seen in front of her boss’ office. “Those people over there, who are they?” Sonya asks cautiously. “They’re with Rainbow.” Clark answers. “With Rainbow? But, I thought…” Before Sonya can finish her sentence, John Clark stops her. “Yeah, Rainbow is back.” Sonya sensed that John had wanted to tell her more, but something stopped him from doing so. Something was definitely going on, and Sonya didn’t know if it was a good or bad sign. Two operators being here at the office, that was something big. John Clark was the leader and founder of Rainbow for years, maybe they wanted him back?

Fuck!

“You are not leaving us!” Clark looked at her, stunned. Before John could find the right words to finish his sentence, another surprise came out of the room. Domingo Chavez, John Clark’s son-in-law and another former member of Rainbow. He was one of the leaders of the two teams that Rainbow had at the time. “Come on Sonya, we need to talk.” Clark says, a trace of uncertainty in his voice. This was odd for Clark as he usually hid his feelings pretty well adapting into a situation. “About what?” “Just come into the office.”

In her boss’ office were three people with two empty chairs beside them, most likely for Clark and Chavez. Her boss, Gerry Hendley, sat behind his desk, Aurelia Arnot sitting in front of him. The Ryan twin knew the older woman because of her father. When Sonya’s father was still president, she had met several hundreds of politicians, among them being Aurelia Arnot. Behind Arnot was a man, a man that was younger than her. In the man’s lap was a notepad, where Sonya could see that he had already taken some notes on it. Clark then brought in a chair for Sonya into the room, the young woman sat down and thanked Clark.

“Hello, Miss Ryan. Long time no see.” Arnot greeted as Sonya sat next to her.

Sonya sat in the chair beside Arnot, Clark and Chavez sitting behind the two women. Arnot took the lead and spoke again. “I heard about your husband, and I’m deeply sorry. I heard a lot of good things about him” Sonya took a deep breath at the woman’s words. She could feel Clark shift behind her.

“Thank you. He was a good man…” The widow murmured about her husband. Her husband’s death that fell in the hands of this cult, was the most traumatizing thing she had to endure. Sometimes Sonya could still hear his screams. Sometimes she could still smell the odor of his burning flesh. Sonya then noticed the unknown man in the room jotting something down on his notepad.

“Has Mr. Clark already told you about this?”

“That leads me to my question, what on Earth is going on here?”

“It’s about Rainbow.” Clark states.

“I don’t understand. Clark nor Chavez are leaving for Rainbow, so what is this meeting about?”

“I’ll make my explanation of this situation short. I am the current leader of Rainbow, Rainbow starting up again in 2015 after a few attacks around the globe. As of now, we have different teams in different countries. Countries like Germany, Russia, England, and America with the FBI.” After the older woman’s statement, the room became tense.

“And right now, I’m currently looking for more people with different abilities and gadgets to join our team, and Clark gave me a few candidates.” “So, this is about Midas?” A former member of Delta Force. He was the leader of his own team, but later retired and joined Campus. He is the living definition of badass but he didn’t have any gadgets. Sonya didn’t get an answer to her question, so she brought up more candidates.

“Caruso?” Her cousin. “Jack?” Sonya asked, but she still didn’t receive an answer. Midas was a perfect candidate for this role. Even Caruso was perfect, with him being an FBI agent with several years of experience. Jack was an analyst and an operating officer. He was trained by a former Rainbow operator several years back. He was also a big part of the Campus.

There was a pause in the room. The Ryan twin could feel the tension rising. She could feel that Clark and Chavez were growing uncomfortable behind her. That was when she realized it. The instinct she got from her time as an FBI agent kicked in. Sonya’s mood changed rapidly.

No… goddamn it Clark!

Sonya turns around in her chair, eyes filled with hate and anger. “Fuck you, Clark!” were the first words she spat out. Not Midas or even Clark would be joining Rainbow. She, Sonya Ryan, was on the list and was the one selected. She was so angry with him, even though he was her mentor and good friend, right now she just saw him as a huge idiot.

“No!” Sonya screamed, filling like he was screaming at the world. “I’m not going to join Rainbow.” Sonya states, turning around in her chair.

“Sonya, please-” Clark started, but Sonya was fast to shut him up.

Aurelia looked at her, her face showing no surprise. She expected this answer. “Sonya, please, I selected you because of your gadgets and abilities. You’re perfect for this position.”

“No, I’m not!” Sonya could see through her teary eyes, the man taking more notes on this notepad.

Her gadgets being perfect for Rainbow? Her abilities? Now that was the funniest thing that Sonya had ever heard. A gadget whose only purpose was to block an open door with electricity. Nothing too special really, especially nothing special for Rainbow. No purpose for this elite organization.

Sonya could feel panic rising in her chest. The same feeling she had when her and her late husband realized he was going to die. That he would die a painful death. That she could do nothing to save him. That she would see his flesh melting in front of her. Sonya could feel her ears starting to ring and a nauseous feeling in her stomach. To Sonya, this situation felt unfair. Midas, a former Delta Force, would be much better for this position. Hell, even her own twin brother would’ve been a much better choice than her.

“I’m sorry, Miss Arnot…” Sonya began with teary eyes. “I-I’m not perfect for this job. I’m still not mentally suitable for this sort of job. Thank you for the kind offer, but I have to decline.” Sonya then stood up, just wanting to run away from this situation. Right now, she wanted nothing more than to just go home, take a shower and sleep. “We can help you with anything you need. Teeth, scars, mental stability, we have trained professionals ready to help.” Miss Arnot then reaches into her pocket and pulls out a business card. “Feel free to call me anytime.”

The only thing Sonya could do was nod. Sonya took the card the Arnot gave to her, and said her goodbyes before leaving the room. The two Rainbow operators were still waiting in the same spot as before Sonya’s meeting. Without any hesitation, Sonya took all of her stuff from her office and left the building.

Tag list: @unpetitoiseau @poisonedtruth @infinitewhore @scentedcandleibex

[dialovers-translations]

Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN ー Ruki Maniac [07]

CHAPTER MASTERLIST

ー The scene starts in the study room of the Sakamaki castle

*Flip* 

Ruki: ( ...Trismégiste... )

Monologue

I wonder just how much time has passed,

since I retreated to the study room,

and began to dig through the various books.

After reading through book after book from the human world,

I finally stumbled upon the following information. 

In a distant past, in Eastern Europe,

there was a certain man,

who was rumored to be a Devil. 

The name of this man who brought a whole Kingdom to its fall from the shadows,

was Trismégiste.

Exactly, this man called Trismégiste,

did in fact exist at some point. 

Furthermore, the era in which they say he most likely lived,

overlaps with the time period in which I was still a human. 

In other words,

this might very well be the same individual,

whomst my Father referred to as ‘Trismégiste’.

Ruki: ( ...I suppose this is all the information I’ll get from here. )

( This is all based on claims of a mentally unstable nobleman’s wife, so its accuracy is doubtable at best. I probably shouldn’t pay too much mind to it, however... )

( ...What if - just maybe - this ‘Trismégiste’ mentioned here was actually Karlheinz-sama...? )

( If he lived in the city of my childhood under the name of ‘Trismégiste’ just like he later infiltrated Japan as Sakamaki Tougo... )

 ー Ruki recalls his Father’s words

Ruki’s Father: That guy...He appeared out of nowhere a couple of days ago and has already become one of the president’s favorites...!

He whispered a couple of sweet words into the president’s ear and had me removed by the president himself! How am I supposed to stay positive under these circumstances!? 

ー The flashback ends

Ruki: ( If he was the one who laid the foundation for the revolution by manipulating the President behind everyone’s back... )

( Then the person responsible for ruining the government, driving my Father into a corner as well as my very own death would beーー )

...No. 

Trismégiste...is not Karlheinz-sama. There is just no way...

*Knock knock* 

Yui: Ruki-kun?

Ruki: ...Yui, is that you? What’s the matter?

Yui: Sorry for bothering you. There’s a visitor for you. Could you come to the entrance hall? 

Ruki: A visitor for me? ...Okay, I’ll be right there. 

...

( ...I’ll forget about what I read here. )

It is not history nor someone else’s statements which I trust.

No matter what, I shall only have faith in you. ...Karlheinz-sama. 

ー The scene shifts to the entrance hall

Yui: Sorry for interrupting you while you were reading.

Ruki: Don’t mention it. I was just about to call it a day anyway.

So, where is this visitor you spoke of?

Yui: They’re outside. They wouldn’t come in unless I got your permission first.

Ruki: ...?

ー Ruki steps outside

Kou: Ah, there they are!

Ruki: Kou...! ...Yuma.

Yuma: ...Yo.

Ruki: What brings you two here...? And where’s Azusa?

Kou: Azusa-kun is house sitting. We would have loved to come with the whole group, but we can’t leave Eden behind empty now.

Yuma: That’s why I told ya I’d be fine by myself. I can’t believe ya just had to tag along as well.

Kou: Oh come on, don’t be like that? I came along because I figured you wouldn’t be honest about how you feel otherwise. 

Yuma: Maybe you should mind your own business!

Kou: Yeah, yeah! Just forget about me right now. Come on, Yuma-kun. You’ve got something you want to say to Ruki-kun, don’t you?

Ruki: What is it? 

Yuma: ...Sorry for what I did the other day.

Ruki: ...

Yui: ( Ruki-kun’s not saying anything... )

Selection

→ Aren’t you happy? 

Yui: Aren’t you happy, Ruki-kun?

Ruki: ...Haah.

→ Ruki-kun, you too... (❦)

Yui: Ruki-kun, you too...Right? 

Ruki: ...I know.

Ruki: I’m sorry as well. I realize now that I should have kept my calm and tried to talk it out with you.

Yuma: No, look, that’s not the issue...

Kou: Yuma-kun, you have to be clear about what you mean.

Yuma: ...I know. Listen, Ruki. Is it our fault that ya turned out this way?

Ruki: What do you mean?

Yuma: Whether or not ya had to give up on livin’ yer life as ya wish, ‘cause ya had to look after us. 

If that’s the case, then you’ve done enough. I know that ya think we can’t handle ourselves, but we’ll start workin’ hard toーー

Ruki: Ridiculous...What makes you think it’s your fault?

It’s my own fault that I turned out like that. Because no matter how much time passes, I can’t seem to part with my past...I’m to blame. 

Yui: ( Ruki-kun... )

Kou: That’s not a bad thing. I don’t think you can help feeling that way. We were in fact human at one point after all.

Ruki: ...Exactly. 

However, we are Vampires right now. ...We should forget about our past as humans. 

Yui: ( ...Ruki-kun? )

Ruki: Point being, it isn’t you guys’ fault. I can say that with confidence.

Kou: ...I see.

Well then, we’re good again now, right? There’s actually something we’d like to ask you now that we’re on friendly terms again.

Ruki: Ask me?

Kou: Yup! Listen, I’m really craving your vongole bianco.

Ruki: ...And here I was worried what you’d ask.

Kou: I mean, I haven’t eaten it in forever! I’m suffering from a severe case of vongole-deprivation!

Yui: ...Fufu. Ruki-kun, I’m kind of in the mood for that as well.

Ruki: You too...?

Yuma: If you’re gonna make some, I’d like to order an extra-large servin’.

Ruki: ...Good grief. You’re all so selfish. I suppose I’ll have no other choice then. 

Kou: Hooray!

Yui: Let’s head inside then? I’ve already talked to Shuu-san so it’s fine.

Yuma: Yeah. We’ll make ourselves at home then.

ー Kou and Yuma head inside

Ruki: Seems like you’re well prepared.

Yui: I figured this would happen sooner or later. I had faith that you guys would make it up to each other.

Ruki: Heh...I didn’t think you’d get one step ahead of me like that. But still, thanks.

...Sorry for always needing you to look out for me.

Yui: No, don’t mention it. Why don’t we go inside as well?

Ruki: Yeah.

Monologue

I turn around to head back inside the castle. 

Both Ruki-kun and myself,

were holding each other’s hand.

I am sure that it is not thanks to me,

that it seems as if he finally eased up a little.

Kou-kun, Yuma-kun and Azusa-kun. 

I am truly glad those three are there for him. 

Once again, I can feel just how strong their bond (絆) is. 

The dinner we enjoyed together that night,

turned out more delicious and fun (楽しい) than any other did before.

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー