#everyone thinks Mia & Al are twins

[puppetmaster13u]

So I am rotating the batfamily, but not like, civilian or vigilante. I am slowly rotating them all having a Malone-sona of sorts that is their in to organized crime.

Like you can't tell me people wouldn't start noticing this family that the bats, the literal cryptids and monsters of Gotham, don't even touch and lets continue to operate despite taking the older crime families apart.

And to Gotham that screams power.

Alfred = Albert “Old Al” Malone I wanna say that he doesn't go out as 'Old Al' often, but gives off Godfather sort of vibes. Usually sitting there with an old cane (that definitely has a sword, they're all dramatic like that lol) half in the dark with a cup of tea or other drink. He gets to stretch his acting skills and honestly the kids definitely had a say in the persona. Old Al is something they all made together and they have fun implying so much fun shit.

Kate = Mary “Madam” Malone She definitely gives off 'snap your spine over her knee if not for the fact it would get your blood all over her clothes' vibes. Stylized nails, hair up in fishtail braids or ponytails or whatever, looks like she could tear out ones throat and they'd thank her. It's a running gag that she's in finances, even if no one in the underbelly believes it.

Bruce = “Matches” Malone I mean, it's classic Matches (though most probably assume that Matches isn't his real name) who seems rather chill until someone breaks the rules. Gives off vibes that he doesn't usually get his own hands dirty but will do so to make a point, and enjoy doing it. He sometimes uses Matches to check in on places he can't as a shadowy cryptid, and it's not like the lower income areas would fully trust Brucie Wayne.

Barbara = Madison “Maddie” Malone Now let's be honest, Barbara enjoys messing with people, she enjoys knowing every little thing as Oracle, and she definitely does that as Maddie. The thing is, no one knows how she learns about things, other criminals search for a traitor, for a leak, for anything, and get nothing. Which is utterly terrifying. Because there has to be some sort of information network, there has to be. And somehow they're so good that they're indistinguishable to any others.

Dick = Micheal “Mikey” Malone Honestly Dick uses this chance to get into a bunch of fights just for fun. Flirts a bit more freely but doesn't really have an interest in actually getting with someone. Just has funs and is known for throwing his own parties that usually end in free-for-all brawls. He absolutely loves being able to have parties that are the opposite of galas he's usually dragged into.

Cass = Molly Malone She's quiet and graceful, but she takes it to unnerving levels as Molly. Looks slim but carries guns on her at all time to better differentiate between Cassandra Wayne, Black Bat, and Molly Malone. Everyone knows if you need a weapon, guns, meelee, whatever, she's the one you go to. Gotham help you if you cross her though.

Jason = Peter “Petey” Malone Where Molly Malone goes, everyone knows Petey will be there as well. Jason absolutely adores the time he gets to do so, it's his turn to be silent and dramatic. Everyone can recognize the jagged scar over his neck, they can recognize it from corpses the Bats have gotten their talons on. Honestly he's delighted in being able to be Cass' enforcer of sorts and just have a good fight. Even if he complains about how making his Malone mute makes it where he can't quote Shakespeare like he wants to.

Steph = “Mia” Malone Ah yes, the explosive Malone. The one who has more arson charges than Firefly. Or at least she would if she was caught, but the entire Underbelly knows it was her. Steph is living her best life being able to pull all sorts of pranks and crazy shit and takes several ideas from Harley. Honestly she probably smells like gasoline or smoke all the time, and definitely put glitter in her hair. Maybe even has red hair as a Malone as well.

Tim = Alvin “Al” Malone He still goes by Alvin Draper too, which results in half the underbelly thinking that Draper is his middle name. Honestly he's having the best time, everyone knows to come to him for forgeries and less than legal identities, which he loves to create. I mean just look at how many new identities he creates for himself alone. He enjoys this type of thing, and hey, it's so easy to keep track of whose identity is fake when you're the one who made them. Plus it also lets him do good for those on the run for good reasons, a way to make sure people are safe.

Duke = Dennis “Denny” Malone Everyone knows Denny was adopted, but y'know what, I bet they don't care. And you know Duke is utterly insane, like jump off a bridge to escape the cops and create the We are Robin gang insane. And he gets to play that up as Denny. He will put forth the most batshit ideas and actually pull them off. I bet he uses his future-sight to cheat at different games and pool tables and all sorts of things, but no one can ever prove it. Because there is no proof, and the other people playing just has to deal with it.

Damian = “Mini M” Malone The little baby of the family, who everyone knows the older Malones absolutely dote over. This is his chance to act like an actual child, just with a hint of art theft. Hey, it wasn't like they got it legally either, so it's free game, especially if they weren't taking proper care of the art or a pet. He's just pleased to get to have even more pets, and that Goliath his demon dragon-bat gets to go on walkies.

Jarro = Jadan “Lil J” Malone Now Jarro is delighted to have a third mech, and is even more delighted for people to believe Damian (or technically M jr) and him are twins. Gives off someone is going to die- of fun with Mini M, and honestly enjoys being able to use his natural telepathy to be a small horror movie child that knows too much. Like will stare up at someone with wide eyes covered in blood and the others in Gotham's underbelly still aren't sure if the blood was his or someone elses. (it was neither)

================================================

Honestly I might write a oneshot or something for the Cryptid Batfam focusing on just them as the Malones family.

[the-witching-ash]

🌟 + Hayden

1) Lactose Intolerant, also allergic to leather

2) Part of the reason he’s in all the activities he’s in his is to see if something sticks out for him to possibly turn into a career.

3) Halloween is his absolute favorite holiday, Al always lets him be in charge of decorating the house.

4) It’s not a secret Hayden and Sugar aren’t twins, that they have different mother’s she’s actually a few months older, but everyone still thinks their twins if they don’t specify otherwise.

5) Bisexual

6) Doesn’t like any type of Coffee & has tried it multiple ways.

7) Isn’t a big theater kid, but does know all of Wicked and Mamma Mia’s lyrics by heart

8) Beiste makes him Titan’s captain in later years

9) Quits New Directions in season 3 out of solidarity with Sugar, but doesn’t join the Trubletones either because he thinks they should remain a girl group. Rejoins when the girls do/in We Are Young.

10) Al let him choose between Dalton and Mickenly, he choose mickenly because it had more activities available. (He’s sometimes not sure why he thought it was a good decision at the time.)

[alkaysani-archived]

The Old Guard Fanfic Master List

*updated* 15 Oct 2020

MAIN SERIES

AS OUR LOVE SHAPES OUR UNIVERSE  (Nicky x Joe - Princess Diaries AU)

to love is to sacrifice, to sacrifice is to love 

“Prince Yusuf Al-Kaysani,” Charlotte says, and she’s sighing dreamily again and Yusuf definitely has that effect on people. “That young man gets my vote,” Joseph says from behind him. “He goes by Joe sometimes, so he’s definitely of good stock,” he says, and Nicky snorts. “A brilliant one, amazing artist, charismatic. He’s dedicated himself as the right-hand and advisor to his queen mother, and has fully supported his younger sister taking the throne instead of him. He’s friends with Nicolo,” he says, and Nicky blinks, shrugging a little, and his heart starts to go wild in his chest in a way he doesn’t want to understand. “We spent two years of secondary together,” he whispers, glancing at Mia. “Uh…just before they passed, he had to move back home, and I…” he trails off, sighing. --- or the Princess Diaries II AU where Prince Nicolo will do anything for Genovia. And if that means introducing his cousin Princess Mia to Prince Yusuf Al-Kaysani to be her future king, then his heart just has to deal with it. He just wished that it didn’t hurt so much.

i will hold your heart together in mine 

“You love me now, right?” “Forever more, my darling,” Joe chokes out, and it takes on a whole new meaning that makes his own ache. “Then my heart will heal,” Nicolo says, and his voice is firm, and fierce, under the exhaustion. “The symptoms will fade, in time. They will,” he adds, his voice muffled against his shoulder. He pulls away and looks up at Joe with wide, glassy eyes. “The universe won’t be so cruel to me to take me away now, when I am finally happy, right?” he says, and Joe burst into tears then, shaking his head, grabbing Nicolo’s face and kissing him, deeply. No. No. He won’t think of it. He won’t think of losing Nicolo. Not again. Not like this. *** or where Prince Yusuf learns the physical extents of Nicolo’s heartbreak, months after they were meant to be fine. But regardless of how much it ails him, his beloved Nicolo continues to have faith that he will be alright. So he must brave through his fears and his worries, as they grow, and build a life and a family, together. Even if it breaks their hearts again. And again. And again.

black cats and lopsided hearts (Joe x Nicky) - 30 Oct 2020

“Permission to keep killing your fiancé with cuteness due to Halloween costumes, please?” Mia asks, and she’s giving Nicolo those eyes again, and this time, Nicolo bites his lip, glancing at Joe. “It might be fun, beloved. It’ll only be for a night,” he reasons, and Nicolo sighs then, nodding his head. “For you, heart.” *** or The Old Guard Princess Diaries AU – Halloween Special where Mia convinces Nicolo and Yusuf to let her dress up one and a half-year old twins Elio and Ayla for this very American holiday.

ONE-SHOTS & STAND-ALONES

JOE x NICKY

not that i need reminding 

“You look in love.” Joe blinks, looking up at the voice. There’s a woman, a little younger than Nile, or maybe just her age, sitting beside him on the bench now. She’s smiling at him, and he gives her what he hopes is an equal one, before nodding softly, gently tapping his pencil on his sketchbook. He knows the answer, of course he does. Yes. He is in love. Truly, madly, deeply, or however they say it. He knows all of this already. But he’s willing to play. “And how does that look?” --- or joe gets a vibe check from the universe.

to know those among us 

“Mommy, angel! Angel, mommy!” Nicky blinks, putting down the produce he had in his hand. He zeros in on the voice and a little boy staring up at him, jaw dropped and staring, his eyes wide and curious. Then he looks up to find a woman, blushing red, looking absolutely mortified. Even with her darker tone, the flush is clear, making her glow. She looks ready to run, so Nicky just gives her a smile, and then crouches in front of the child, before looking around, humming curiously. “Where, little one?” he asks, putting his hands over his eyes as he continues his search. “Where is the angel?” he asks, and the little boy giggles. It’s a beautiful sound amongst the low bustle of the early farmer’s market. --- or nicky gets mistaken for an angel by a child, so he tells them about real ones

in parts, i fall, i love

Joe needs to finish this portfolio if he wants something to propose to the showcase. And he does. He really does. But someone just sat at his table because the coffee shop is so busy, and their profile is gorgeous, and yep, he’s definitely trashed the outline again because this man is definitely going to be a part of it. “Is there something on my face?” he hears, and Joe pauses. Shit. Joe breathes out so heavily that his glasses fog up, and he looks up to find the man giving him a hint of a smile, tilting his head slightly to the side. “You’re staring,” the man states and honestly, yeah, Joe is. “I’m not.” Idiot. --- or joe is an artist, and he falls in love. and nicky is along for the ride.

with your hands, your whispers 

Come on love, that’s it.” “I can’t, Yusuf, please.” He’s gasping, breathless. His Yusuf always leaves him so breathless. It’s too much. And of course, Yusuf knows that it’s too much. He knows exactly what Nicky needs, and what makes him overflow, and it seems like his adoring heart wants him to spill over, again and again in every sense of the word. *** or a take on what nicolo and yusuf were doing before booker and andy got to the hotel in marrakesh

let’s right, these wrongs, together (see accompanying edit here)

If he concentrates hard enough, he can still smell Yusuf on the scarf, and it brings immediate tears to his eyes. Because it’s only been nearly a year, and he’s yearned for the man for longer, way before they got together. And even with all the odds, with all the numbers combined, Nicky doesn’t believe that there’ll be enough time that can pass to heal the pain that’s clawing on his chest at that moment. That has been since Yusuf said it was over.   Nile’s legs move from his lap, and suddenly there are arms around him, pulling him close and Nicky closes his eyes, pressing his face on Nile’s neck. “You’re allowed to hurt as long as you have to, Nicky,” Nile says to him, and it’s so, so kind. “You can tell me as much or as little as you can. I didn’t mean to push.” Nicky sniffles. “I still love him,” he croaks out, like it needed to be heard, like his desperation is a call out for his heart. His heart that let him go, that told him that it’s over. *** or the one where Nicky is housemates with Nile after Yusuf breaks up with him. And when he finally opens up about it, Nicky realizes that his current predicament was brought on by misunderstandings and good intentions with ill results. But it’s too late. It’s been nearly a year; it doesn’t matter now. Right? Not if your housemate is Nile Freeman.

hand-shaped bruise (see accompanying edit here)

Prince Nicolò spends most of his days alone. He lives with no one, after all, ever since his parents died. Ever since he was killed by Sr. Merrick and Lady Kozak, his screams ringing out throughout the night until his final breath, only to show up the next day at the farmer’s market. *** or my halloween take on our beloved characters.

BOOKER x COPLEY

when time dictates love 

"So not ugly,” Sebastien says, and Aidan looks at Mr. Copley, who just shrugs, smiling. “He is insufferable. Does he know this?” he says, and the man just smiles, both of them ignoring how Sebastien says ‘hey!’. “He does,” Mr. Copley whispers, and he says, and Sebastien’s fingers intertwine with his atop his knee, and Aidan looks away. “But you like him anyway,” he says instead. Mr. Copley chuckles, and he leans to press a kiss on Sebastien’s forehead, who’s no longer laughing. “Yes, but I like him anyway.” --- or a home-care worker witnesses Booker and Copley’s last year together, as time catches up on them

MULTIPLE RELATIONSHIPS

there is no timeline when it comes to this (Booker x Copley; Joe x Nicky - also featuring Joe & Booker bffs and Nicky really giving a damn about Booker)

“I’m happy for you, Yusuf,” Booker says, because he means it despite the ache, and Joe smiles, nodding, and he’s smiling in a way that makes his heart hurt even more. “We love you, Booker,” Joe says because he’s just that person, before driving off as Booker makes his way up to his apartment, steps feeling like lead. He makes the point to check the mail, and he’s not even sure why. He’s never checked mail before, Joe usually did. Booker pauses then, looking at the different ads he pulled out of the box after twisting the key. So many changes already. When he finally gets to his unit, he finds someone standing at the door. They turn when he pauses, and greets him with a smile. “Hello Booker,” James Copley says, giving him a two-finger salute. “You haven’t aged a day.” *** or where Booker’s best friend Yusuf moves out to be with his Nicolo, and he makes the choice to live alone for the first time in years. Booker tells himself he’ll be fine, tells everyone that he’ll be fine, even though the weight in his chest tells him otherwise. but he really has no choice. this is his life now. then James Copley comes home.

OTHER SHIPS & FRIENDSHIPS & NO SHIPS

little things, for the heart (Nile and Joe)

“Are you…baking bread?” Joe looks up at her then, and Nile snorts, walking over to the counter and reaching up to tug on the man’s stray curls, dark tight ringlets dusted with white flour. “Maybe,” Joe says, in a sing-song tone. *** or Nile takes a lesson she learned from her mother and applies it to her new life.

OTHER SERIES

THE NILE FREEMAN COLLECTION (Written for Nile Freeman Week 2020)

nile + love or where Nile meets another queen 

nile + sadness or where Nile keeps it real with Booker

nile + alone time or where Nile gets of ice cream and thinks of dying

nile + comfort or where Nile makes Joe feel better, the best way she knows how

MY LOVE, WE STILL HAVE MUCH TO LEARN (Post-Canon Take)

do not let me awake alone (Nicky x Joe)

After Booker’s betrayal, Joe is angry and Nicky suffers through the fallout. And for the the first time in a long time, Nicky understands what it's like to be alone in his grief.And something inside him breaks.

my love for him kills any anger (Nicky x Joe; Joe & Andy)

A month later, Andy finds out that Nicky is talking to Booker.But it doesn’t mean that Joe forgives him. Far from it. They've been through so much for him to just let it go.

a blessing from above (Nile & Nicky; Nile & Joe; Nicky x Joe) 

Nile gets used to a few things, three months into her new life. But the one thing that wracks her brain the most is how they deal with loss and suffering.Thankfully, she has a lifetime to figure it out. Because they’re family, and she wants to help them. At least, start them on the right path. They are grown people, after all. Because her Mama raised her right.

[afaimsarrowverse]

Arrowverse-Spin-Offs, we would like to see:

„Arrow“ and „Black Lightning“ are done, „Supergirl“ is in its last season and „The Flash“ and „Legends of Tomorrow“ will probably be over rather sooner than later. So it’s time to look at some potential Spin-Off-Ideas and the reasons why we won’t see any of those happening. But hey, I have been wrong before. The last time I did such a list, I wrote that Warner would never allow a „Superman“-Show to happen, because of them wanting him exclusive for the movies, even though at this point the Powers that Be were already working on getting „Superman & Lois“ on the way (because they have been working on that since around „Elseworlds), so maybe in two years one of those shows on this list will actually air at The CW:

Atoms: Since Ray has left „Legends“ I have been missing him, and since Crisis was the last we ever saw of Ryan Choi, yes, I still want „Atoms“, starring both Ray Palmer and Ryan Choi and their respectice wives, sciencing their way out of every problem and superheroing a little bit at the side. Yes, Fairy Godmother Nora would be a challenge to put into that concept, but if someone really wanted to find a way to integrate that storyline in the show, they could and if not, they could just do away with her powers off-screen. To bad Brandon Routh and Berlanti Productions did not part under the best terms and that the reason they got rid of him in the first place was that they couldn’t afford him any longer, so this one is not likely to ever happen. Also, I am not sure too many people are actually interested in a whole show about the Atom. Even if there a two of them.

Canaries: With „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ not picked up, they could return to this fan-favored concept: A solo show for Laurel and Dinah. Ditch the Future Crap or wrap it up in the Pilot, let them live in the present again and be a crime fighting double act. Or just set in the future, if you must, and let Dinah keep her club and just say good bye to the Queen-Kids. But since both actresses waited for a year to star in a show, that was not happening and said no to jobs because of that and the plotthreats of the „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ Backdoor-Pilot are still up in the air, it is very unlikely that we will get to see this one.

ThunderGrace: They should have aimed for that show instead of „Painkiller“, they might have had better chances to get picked up with it. Anyways, giving Anissa and her new wife Grace their own show, set in a different city of course, would go great with certain protions of the „Black Lightning“-Audience and might even attract new viewers. Having Jennifer and TC guest star regulary would also be great. Sadly this won’t happen of course, „Black Lightning“ already was very much Anissa’s story, giving her her own show would be like continuing „Black Lightning“ just without Jefferson, so it would basically be the same and therefore The CW would not go for it. Also, as long as „Batwoman“ is around, they would not do a second show with a lesbian Superhero Lead, who fights streetlevel, and since Season 2 also not one about a lesbian Superhero Lead, who is black on the top of that. So sadly, not happening.

Guardian and the Sentinel: „Supergirl“ is not getting a Spin-Off, but if we could choose, only Jessica Queller would go for the „Midvale“-One. Having Alex Danvers and Kelly Olsen als crime fighting partners in every sense on our screens would be great. Yes, the title might need some working on, but the concept would be great. They would probably operate outside of National City, there might even be a way to get the military angle in somehow. However as with „TunderGrace“, thanks to „Batwoman“ this one will never get made, because neither Alex nor Kelly have superpowers. Too bad.

Daughters of the Demon: I am very aware that I am the only one, who wants this Spin-Off. But I still want it. A show build around Thea Queen and the Al Ghul-Sisters (and Roy Harper of course) and their dealings with the League of Assassins in all forms and shapes. Katrina Law is of course not available right now, but the main reason we will never see a show around Thea, Nyssa, and Talia is that no one except me is really interested in it.

Dreamer (and Brainiac-5): This one has probably the best chance of ever happening from everything on this list, but given that it wasn‘t done anywhere outside this year’s Pride-Special, means that there probably are no actual plans for it. Anyways, a show about Dreamer with Brainy at her side, probably set in a new city rather than National City, would be great. Nia is still very new to the superhero-game, just finding her feet, and her romance with Brainy can go to many more places. But after the backlash in regards to „Batwoman“, The CW is probably hesitant to dare making a show about a transhero starring an actual transwoman. Nia might rather get moved to „Legends“ or „Superman & Lois“ or get to guest star on „The Flash“ next season than get her own show.

Next Gen: Mia Queen did not get her own show, when she was teamed up with the Canaries. However if you were to team her up with the Tonado-Twins and a Super-Spawn (not the Kent Twins though), she and Dig’s kids might just get another chance for their own show with William as their tech support. However the death of „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ makes that very unlikely, addionally we don’t know what will happen to Nora and Bart on „The Flash“ yet or where they will go with Kara or Clark for that matter in the future. And show set in the future would also cement that future, which would limit all the other shows somehow in storytelling terms, which might have been one of the reasons „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ was not picked up, so don’t hold you breath for that one.

Hall of Justice: Crisis established the League, but in a few months, only Sara, Barry and Clark will be left. But Nate is probably not the only one who applied for a seat. This one would of course have to take place between seasons or star everyone expect the heroes, who currently still have a show. I did name it „Hall of Justice“ on purpose, because there are many reasons, why this would never happen with the other name, but to be blunt, it would probably never happen under any name. However, this would be a good way to actually end the Arrowverse. To do a mini-series, where the League assembles after the last or most of the old shows are done. This could be one last Crossover with the potential of Follow Up- Features, if someone would ever want to make more of it.

An Anthology-Show:

 Originally „Legends of Tomorrow“ was supposed to be an Anthology-Show, and while the decision to make an acutal show instead was the right one back then, the Arrowverse has grown since then, and the idea to do an Anthology-Show to keep it alive is actually a No-Brainer. Instead of whole Seasons, it would be better to go for Two-Parters, Three-Parters, Four Parters and even One Offs though, in order to get more stuff done in the span of a season. The main reason this will not happen is money of course - without standing sets this one would be hard to pull off, but I think it is necessary at this point. And they could even do only two arcs per season or  only a hand full of episodes. This is where they could wrap up the open stortythreads from the failed Backdoor-Pilots – „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ and „Painkiller“ –and also where they could test out new Spin-Off Ideas, they could do my entire list here, plus more, like Slade and his sons, a story about the Hawk s, one about Kate Kane, or even Brandon Routh’s version of Superman etc. They could even go back and do in-between episodes about forgotten and dropped storylines, to which they never got around, like Roy’s death and resurrection or Rip’s founding of the Time Bureau. Additionally this is where they could do the Annual Crossover, they would not need to sacrifice episodes of the other shows, but instead air the Crossover as the Mid-Season Replacement in its own show, followed by some other storylines. But like I said, money is not on the side of this one.

 Bonus: Show that will air on HBOmax instead and therefore can’t happen for the Arrowverse:

John Diggle, Space Cop:

 This would be the Arrowverse Version of „Green Lantern“ and with a „Green Lantern“ Show heading to HBOmax it will of course never happen.

Hellblazer:

 Not too long ago this was my top-bet for a new Arrowverse-Spin-Off, given that Matt Ryan’s „Constantine“ left a lot of unresolved storylines behind, but now that a new version of „Constantine“ with a younger John Constantine as the Main Protagonist in it, is heading to HBOmax, Matt Ryan’s version of the character may even be scrapped from the Arrowverse for good in the soon future. Let’s hope there is room for both versions of the character, but a Spin-Off for the Arrowverse is very much not happening any more.

Booster Gold (and Blue Beetle):

 Wait, you might say, since when is Booster Gold getting his own series on HBOmax? Well, he was at least planned to get one. Alongside „Green Lantern“ another show was announced back then, remember?„Strange Adventures“  was supposed to feature Booster Gold. And while it has become kind of quite around this project, it was not officially scrapped. Given that it is very unlikely that we will ever get to see an Arrowverse-Version of Booster Gold instead, much less in his own show, and with „Blue Beetle“ getting his own show on HBOmax as well, Ted Kord will probably also never pop up in the Arrowverse, and Michael and Ted will never team up alonside the Legends. Too bad.

[yikesharringrove]

imagine

if billy and steve

did high school theater 👁👄👁

this is seriously something I think about ALL THE TIME. I’m such a theater kid these two in theater is what I think about at night to go to sleep i’m not kidding

Billy as Roger in Rent also Steve as Mark (my Jewish Steve headcanon returns yeah boi)

Steve as Riff in West Side Story (although Billy would make a good Riff too. And Steve could probably do Tony well too. idk) Okay I want Steve as Riff for Cool and the Jet Song but Billy as Riff for Dear Officer Krupke I can’t tell you why I can just tell you I’m right

Billy as Billy Flynn and Steve as Amos Hart in Chicago (try NOT to get sad thinking abt Steve doing Mr. Cellophane are you serious??? That boy lashed out so hard to NOT feel invisible oh god I’m getting emo)

I lose my shit over the idea of nb Steve discovering Hedwig and the Angry Inch (that show made me Realize Some Things) but also imagine Billy as Hedwig and Steve as Tommy Gnosis and Robin as Yitzhak (Jewish Robin, anyone?)

I started a musical theater club at my university with some friends and I have been pushing really hard to do Heathers bc I would LOVE to have lesbian Veronica and J.D. but also consider: Steve as Veronica, Billy as J.D. (solely for Dead Girl Walking 🤤), Steve as Heather Chandler bc Candy Store is iconic and he would live his best life getting to be a mythic bitch like Heather C., and Billy and Steve as Ram and Kurt bc that idea made me laugh

Steve as Harry, Billy as Bill in Mamma Mia just to be cursed

Billy as Link and Steve as Corny Collins in Hairspray

Steve as Seymor, Billy as Dr. Orin Scrivello DDS in Little Shop of Horrors (Billy would get his life with the Dentist! song but lowkey I think he’d hate playing the role and having to Be Like That to Audrey)

Billy as Emcee and Steve as Cliff in Cabaret

Billy as Sweeney Todd and Steve as Pirelli in Sweeney Todd (although I could see this in reverse too) I could also see Steve as Anthony and now I’m thinking abt Robin as Mrs. Lovett and Dustin as Tobias for the Nothin’s Gonna Harm You song and I’m getting emo over it

Steve as Mike and Billy as Al? Or maybe Zach in A Chorus Line. idk I actually really like this show and want Steve as Mike real bad

Steve as Jamie in Everyone’s Talking About Jamie which I have a really good boot for if anyone wants it that show makes me emo it’s so good That show would be so emotional for Steve with all the dad stuff I’m 🥺

Steve as Danny, Billy as Kenickie (which is the superior men’s role tbh) in Grease

Steve as Jack in Into the Woods OR, galaxy brain, Billy as Cinderella’s prince, Steve as Rapunzel’s prince can u IMAGINE those two doing Agony and then Billy fucking the baker’s wife I’m gonna cry

lmao b Billy as Stacee Jaxx in Rock of Ages i’m gonna cry

and for a Rocky Horror Picture Show shadow cast, I want Steve as Frank, Billy as Rocky, but for a production of The Rocky Horror Show I want the roles reversed (remember that picture of Joe Keery with like, blond hair. I think abt that every goddamn day) Steve would also be cute as Brad and Billy can and would go ham as Riff-Raff

and if you wanna have a good time, picture Billy as Satan in The Devil’s Carnival. You’re welcome. (Also Steve as The Twin)

Steve as Charlie Price in Kinky Boots

And they fuck at EVERY cast party but you didn’t hear it from me

[takaraphoenix]

This might be an stupid question... but what is the difference between reader-insert and self-insert? PD: I love your fics!

Oh, it’s not a stupid question at all! If you’re not overly familiar with something, especially things that seem rather similar, it’s hard to keep apart.

Now, I’d like to preface this by saying I am not an expert on it, but these are my observations from years of being in fandom and how I differentiate between them.

I’m better at explaining things with examples so let me give you one for each, a quick fake summary for an example story!

Reader-insert: “You have started your training under Nyssa al Ghul, but the two of you are getting closer and closer. You can feel the tension between you two.”

Self-insert: “Takara Smoak was the secret twin-sister of Mia, who was raised by Tatsuo, and is suddenly thrown into the Crisis when the Monitor time-travelled her and her siblings back. Not only does the fate of the multiverse now hinge on her, she also finds herself in a love-triangle between Nyssa al Ghul and Kate Kane!”

Now, this will make explaining the differences easier, but firstly let me say that, in general you can say that reader-insert is broader.

RI usually features the main character as “You” or “Y/N” for “Your Name”, because naming the character makes it more narrow, while this allows a broader variety of readers to project into it. Some authors also write them in a genderneutral way, others are specifically for female readers or male readers.

SI on the other hand… very often feature… unusual names - things like Starlight Potter-Black or such. Unlike the RI character who is very broad and usually doesn’t get too much background, SI is very narrowed-down. You often find them in long-lost twin-sisters of the actual protagonist.

RI are often direct romances, you set the goal right away. SI very often feature love-triangles, though some also take the straight route of say Harry Potter’s twin-sister who is Draco Malfoy’s soulmate.

SI also very often come as overpowered. If you’ve heard the term Mary-Sue, that’s where that comes from. There is a thin line between writing a fully fleshed out strong female character and making them ridiculously Very Super Special and overpowered. (Though not every self-insert character is automatically a Mary-Sue either; she is just a great example of a self-insert character.)

A published example would be Clary Fray from The Mortal Instruments. The overweight redheaded author wrote about this idealized, beautiful and desired redheaded girl who is pulled into a supernatural love-triangle and is way overpowered (and yes, way overpowered because she and Jace have been exposed to the exact same experiment yet Jace came out “physically stronger than others” while Clary got a whole load of super-special shiny abilities that no one else has, on top of the never-actually-explained “we can pull objects out of paintings!” that she apparently got from her mother). (She also checks the box of super special heritage by being the villain’s hidden daughter who only at Hot Age is revealed to even exist, believed to be the male lead’s sister for a hot minute.)

Another example would be Bella Swan from Twilight, who is an “unasuming” brunette but actually apparently hot enough to make all the boys fall for her and then she gets pulled into a spernatural love-triangle.

Both are excellent examples of “look at the author”, because their characters’ physical description matches an idealized version of the author. The brunette author will not write about a blonde, the white author most definitely won’t write about a woman of color. And they are usually described as characters who live a “wallflower existence”, which then gets contradicted by the fact that at least two insanely sexy boys fall for her.

That’s it, that’s the difference. Self-insert are an insertion of the author’s self, the author very specifically projects themselves into this character - or at least an idealized version of themself. The story unfolding is a very narrowly tailored wish-fulfillment entirely serving the author, since it’s their wish-fulfillment.

Reader-insert can overlap there, since the author in the act of writing, and later the act of rereading, is of course also the reader, but these wish-fulfillment fantasies are of a broader variety, made to suit more people, made to suit more readers. From what I’m seeing when browsing AO3, I feel like nowadays the trend is shifting more to reader-insert than self-insert due to the large mockery those receive.

I don’t know, I think that everybody should write, and read, what they want. If you want to project yourself into Persephone Andromeda Jackson-Potter, long-lost half sister to both Harry and Percy, who is stuck in a love-triangle between Jason Grace and Draco Malfoy? Why not? Go wild. And if you’re the kind of person who thinks that’s childish or ridiculous, then… just… scroll past them and ignore them. It’s stupid making fun of them, I bet nearly everyone had their self-insert characters at one point during their life, because it’s fun.

Self-insert characters don’t have to be about romance. That time you thought up your own Power Ranger or Sailor Senshi or Avenger persona, just to be a part of your favorite team and play-pretend to interact with your favorite characters. That’s the same thing. You’re writing an idealized, powered version of yourself into the existing story, even if it’s just in your head.

(One of mine was Takara Tsukino, daughter of my OTP Seiya/Usagi and Sailor Sun from the future. I was 10 and living my best life. ;D)

[purplesurveys]

584

When was the last time you read a book? A month ago maybe? I had to borrow a book from the library because I had to report one chapter from it for class. I would have loved to read the whole book but I had so little time I could only afford to read the sole chapter assigned to me. What was the last flavor of tea you drank? Lemonade iced tea. If you're a youtuber, what was the last tag video you filmed? I am not, but thanks for not assuming completely lol. Are you subscribed to a lot of channels on youtube? Ugh, yeah. I really should clean up my subscription feed as there are so many of them I never watch anymore. Do you enjoy graphic design? No. I respect people who are great at it, but it’s just not for me.

What's a trend from high school that you miss? YouTubers, definitely. I was in high school when creators like Grace Helbig, Joe Sugg, Zoella, Jim Chapman, Caspar Lee, Hannah Hart, Marcus Butler, Tanya Burr, Smosh, etc. peaked and it was just a whole lot of fun for the longest time. There was something to look forward to every week, people to laugh with every week. I found friends who shared the same love for this kind of content and it felt great overall. Most of these names I mentioned can barely break 100K views nowadays and it’s just a completely different landscape – a little sad, really. What color are your snow boots? I don’t have any, because I don’t need them. Has it snowed yet this year where you live? Nope. What month is it right now? It is currently November. Do you like the season your birthday is in, or would you change it? I like it in general because it gives me a valid reason to celebrate by going to the beach :D Do you make lists of baby names that you like? I do keep a list on my Notes app, lol. What color were the last pair of leggings you wore? Black. I don’t think I have leggings in another color. Do you eat breakfast every day? No, I usually skip it because I’m always running late for school. But when my dad is home, he always makes me breakfast to bring to school.

What is something you hate about your hair? No matter what I do to help it, it has always been frizzy and dry. What was the last thing you had to eat? We had family-style Chinese for lunch, so we had several dishes – yang chao, sweet and sour pork, two kinds of squid dishes, and seafood chami. Do you wish you had a better phone? I’m happy and sooooo in love with my iPhone 8 but of course I find myself pining for an iPhone 11 Pro Max when I see someone with one haha. Will you be making a Christmas wish list video for youtube? No, I don’t make my own videos. If you're a youtuber, what is your channel name? I’m not a YouTuber but I do hold an account – it’s just my irl name. ...and how many subscribers do you have? 0. Would you ever want to do youtube as a career? I’ve thought about doing vlogs for fun but I just never got around to it because I know no one will watch my videos. What was the first thing that you wanted to be when you grew up? Astronaut, I think. I’m not sure if astronaut or firefighter came first. What is annoying you right now? I forgot to submit an online homework for one of my classes which was ridiculously out of character for me to do. I don’t think I’ve failed to submit anything since sixth grade. I felt so bad that I sent a personal message to my prof apologizing because that literally never happens to me. Do you have a headache? Not right now, thank goodness. What color is the rim of your whiteboard? I don’t own one. Are you an alien? (lol I am!) Uh, no? Do you think your parents' childhood photos look vintage? Sure. Unicorn emoji or heart eyes emoji? Heart eyes. I don’t think I’ve ever used the unicorn emoji. Do you find texting fun? It’s not fun, I guess I’d call it convenient. How old were you when you got your license? I was 18 when I got validated for a license, but due to an incompetent government, I was only given my actual driver’s license card this year – I’m 21. Do you miss someone? Sure. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be? I wish I didn’t fucking forget the online submission I mentioned a few questions ago.

Do you block a lot of people on facebook? Not on Facebook, but yes on Twitter. What are your top five picks of baby names for girls? Olivia, Charlotte, Mia, Emilia...and I have an aunt who has a daughter named Elliott and I think that’s a pretty rad name. ...for boys? Jacob, Liam, Luis, Miguel, Noah. What do you think would be good names for twins? I’ve never thought about that, actually. Do you have any friends who have had twins? Nope, but I know sets of twins. If yes, what are the twins' names? Do you have a twin? I do not. If you had a twin sister, what would she be named? I have no idea. Have you ever let someone walk on you and then later regretted it? Just once. Do you have any past mistakes you've made that haunt you every day? LOL MY ONLINE HOMEWORK ^^^ Are you bothered by something someone said to you years ago? A bunch of stuff my mother told me when I was young and still incapable of processing verbal abuse properly. Who is the last friend that you lost? Kyelle and Al. Bye fuckers Do you have anyone who loves and supports you? Yes. ...if not, do you want that? I think everyone wants a little bit of that.

[yourmajestythequeenn]

Confessions Chapter 4

This is a long one: 2k+ 

Warnings: Swearing, torture 

Pairings: Scorpius x Rose, Albus x OC 

Confessions Masterlist

Em’s Masterlist

Chapter 4 ~ There’s Always a Cost

"Rose," Al reads off the slip of paper, grinning deviously.

Fucking Hell…

Anger pulses through my veins.

"Liar," I snarl at him, rising out of my seat. I stalk towards him, snatching the bit of paper from his rough hands, I read in neat letters Rose Weasley.

Shit, I was hoping he was just trying to piss me off.

"Well," I snap crisply. "I’m not going."

I feel a strange tingling sensation creep down my spine. I expect the feeling to pass, but it doesn’t. Weird…

"You have to," Al calmly states, as if he thinks he can control me.

Then suddenly, the sensation spreads down my arms and legs, I can feel it in my fingertips and my toes. With every breath…every heartbeat, the tingling grows stronger, becoming more intense, slowly changing from mere tingling to extreme discomfort.

This must be a leftover sensation from the extreme torture Al put me through at practice today.

"I absolutely do not!" I feebly sit on the couch next to Dominique, but instead of feeling better I feel worse.

Something strange going on…something magical?

"Yes, you do," he insists, his eyebrow slightly raised as if he expects something to happen.

The discomfort pulses through my arms, legs, and torso. A knot grows in my stomach getting bigger, like a puddle of water slowly flooding my body with its presence.

"NO!" I stand, my anger overcoming my weakness. "I most certainly do not! I don’t want a part in your insane plan Al!" The discomfort morphs into pain, rapidly taking over my body. I draw in a long shaky breath.

"Rose…are you okay?" Dom has sensed something's off. She places her hand on my shoulder.

The realization hits me like a ton of spell books. His devious smile and raised eyebrows…Al’s behind it…whatever ‘it’ is.

"Al…" I manage to squeak out. I double over, crumpling to my knees, my arms cradle my stomach my head wedged between my knees.

"What the hell did you do Potter?!" Dom screams, most likely at Al. I shut my eyes trying to block out the world. The pain. Everything.

The pain is extreme, taking over my entire body. My lungs burn with every ragged breath I take, my muscles shake as though every one of them has been stuck into an electrical socket.

"Albus Severus Potter!" screams Dom.

"I…uhhh…sorry?" Al stutters out "I didn’t mean…it wasn’t supposed to-"

"Well whatever you did fix it!"

"I can’t."

"Al what have you done?" A new feminine voice comes in, whom I can only assume is Roxy.

"ROSE!" Assuming he’s finally grasped the seriousness of his idiocy, he grabs me, pulling me close to his warm, strong body. "Rosie, you must go along with my plan. Then it will go away, all the pain, gone. You must believe that you will go." He speaks forcefully, his breath warm on my ear.

Through the blinding pain my brain only processes the words, "go along with my plan," and "pain gone."

I will do anything to make the crippling pain stop.

I want to go to the Slytherin practice…Wow did I just think that?

I want…I want to win…

And to win I have to go…

I force my tense muscles to relax, the pain slipping further away with every thought.

"Rosie…please…" Al’s voice echoes through my scrambled thoughts.

Wanting the pain to go away is one thing; wanting to go to a Slytherin practice is on the opposite side of the universe kind of thing.

But I tried…

I really really did…

As if a giant black hole opened up in my chest, the crippling sensation slowly pulled back from my limbs and my head, leaving my limbs numb and my heart racing, I relax into Al’s arms.

"Al…" Dom’s voice interrupts the silence. "Is it the goblet…the goblet?"

I couldn't hear him answer.

"Albus! How could you be so fucking stupid! She could have died!" Dom’s panicked voice shrieks. "What were you bloody thinking you fucking prick?"

"Do-" Al’s voice is interrupted by more of Dom’s ranting.

"You are the most insensitive arse I have ever met!"

My body feels raw and exhausted. I’m positioned on Al’s lap. My eyes are still squeezed shut…each breath wracking my burning lungs.

"Did you have any idea-" Dom's voice is now interrupted by Al's anger filled one.

"No! I had no idea! You know the story just as much as I do… it must have been the wrong one. Why would you think I would do something like that? She’s my best friend!"

At this point my brain has started to function somewhat normally, but I have no idea what my cousins are talking about. My eyes flutter open…

At my stirring the room once again goes silent.

"Rosie?" Al asks tentatively.

"Yeah… " I croak out of my raw throat.

It seems as if everyone in the room has let out a sigh of relief.

"Rosie," Dom drops to her knees, embracing me as if she hasn’t seen me in years.

As I struggle to sit up, shapes and colors blur together. My stomach churns and my ears feel as though they were filled with cotton balls.

This simple movement is too much for me. I drop my head back in Al’s lap. Darkness encroaches on my vision. Once again, I’m pulled out of the real world, this time into a sea of darkness.

Blurred images swim before my vision as my eyes adjust to the weak morning light. Above me the crest of Gryffndor hangs, the magically animated lion silently roars, shaking his mane and batting the air.

Slowly I turn onto my stomach, immediately realizing that this isn’t my bed. The sheets have golden snitches zipping around the bedclothes at…where the hell am I?

"So, the dead finally awakens." I recognize Al’s voice immediately.

"Where am I?" I groggily question, rubbing my eyes.

"My bed."

"What!" I push myself up, looking at my surroundings…dirty clothes everywhere, unmade beds, and posters of Quidditch teams and half naked witches cover the walls. This is definitely not my dorm.

"Yeah, after you passed out we brought you to the Hospital Wing, we all had to tell McGonagall and Poppy what happened." my eyes grew wide with the fear of everyone knowing about the embarrassing torture I had endured. "Poppy gave you a potion and there was nothing else we could do so I took you up here." He grins at my uncomfortable situation.

"Why did I- ohh…" My last conscious memories flood my brain. Al’s to blame for everything.

"Bastard," I snarl at him, flipping back the covers.

"Rose I-"

"Shut up! Everything that’s happened is your fault!"

"Rose I’m so-"

"Don’t you sorry me, you two-faced nob-headed wanger! I can’t bloody believe you, do you have any bloody idea what I went through? You fucking tosspot! Your mum will hear about this! Mark my words, Albus Potter!” I scream at him, tossing back the covers, kneeling on the bed to get eye to eye with him.

His face is fills with fear at the mention of his mother, but it is all too quickly replaced by anger.

"Rose you have no right, no right, to bring my mother into this!"

"Oh really, I almost died! You are so fucking irresponsible!”

“It was a fucking accident Rose!”

"You git!"

"Nonce!"

"Fucking tosser!"

"Bloody wench!"

"Wanger!"

"Slag!"

"Prick!"

"Minger!"

"Arsehole!"

"What in Merlin’s pants is going on in here?" Shouts a voice from the door.

I look up and see Arthur Birchgrove in all his perfect glory staring over his half-moon glasses.

"Piss off Arthur!" I hiss.

"I was only down in the common room reading this book called The Controdictory-"

"No one cares Birchgrove." Al speaks up.

"Well the Gryffindor handbook states that there shall be no females in the male dormitories," I step forward, but Arthur holds up his hand. "And there shall be no profanities spoken about or to anyone in this house," his gaze is locked on me, as I sit on Al’s rumpled bedclothes.

"Arthur…" Al mumbles obviously annoyed.

"This is your last warning, if I catch you here again. You will be reported," he raises a bushy eyebrow and disappears.

I start to turn back to Al, but another figure fills the doorway. I whip back around to see James, his slim frame leaning against the door.

"Can I help you?" I huff.

"Just heard some yelling and thought I would investigate," he smirks the trademark Potter smirk, "Turns out its just you two, what’s wrong, Red?" he rolls my stupid nickname over his tongue, drawing out the e sound.

"Why don’t you ask your brother," I gesture to Al. James snickers, pushing his wavy black hair out of his eyes.

"James Sirius Potter! What is so funny?" I demand, my lips pressed together menacingly.

"Nothing…Hermione," he drops his eyes to avoid my gaze…well more like death glare. James thinks when I get angry I start to act like my mother, but I am nothing like my mother. Even though we’re blood related, I take after my Weasley side not the nerdy Granger one.

"First off, I think Al owes me an explanation on why I almost died last night." I turn from one brother to the other, crossing my arms over my chest and waiting for an answer.

"Yes…I do," Al says slowly as if he’s making sure to choose his words wisely.

"So, get on with it," I snap impatiently.

"That goblet I picked names from last night is no ordinary goblet…" I wait patiently sitting cross legged on his bed, forcing my face to remain as emotionless as possible. As his tale ends, I am bursting with fury, I cannot even look at that dumbarse anymore. I spring off Al’s bed, and rush out of the room, nearly knocking James to the ground in the process.

I walk into my dorm fuming with anger,

My dorm mates look up from their various morning rituals in worry.

Our dorm consists of; Dom, Juliet Woods -whose brother is our chaser, and who Al set on fire last year by accident- Lucy Weasley, Lavinia Scamander -she’s the Scamander twins’ sister- then there’s Roxy…she is a seventh year, but the girls in her dorm are hags so she unofficially bunks with us. But at the moment Roxy is MIA…probably off snogging some bloke.

"Where were you last night Rosie?" pipes Juliet, she is a ball of energy that never runs out, ever.

"Oh she wa-" starts Dom, looking up from blowing her freshly painted nails dry.

"I fell asleep in the common room, then Al took me up to his room" I interrupt Dom, not wanting the whole school to know that I was tortured by a magic goblet that Godric Gryffindor created. I give Dom my 'shut up now' face; she returns her 'okay, okay sorry' expression.

"You slept in Al’s BED," Lavinia squeals excitedly, thankfully too preoccupied to notice my and Dom’s silent conversing.

"Uhh…yeah," I force my voice to be even, "I really didn’t have a choice."

I sift through my trunk pulling on the first t-shirt and sweatpants I find. Hey, it’s a Saturday.

"He is soooooo cute," Lavinia comments spritzing her face with rose water.

"Al Potter" sighs Juliet dreamily, she’s had a terrible crush on Al since first year. But for appearances she acts as if she cannot stand him, I really don’t understand women in love.

"Ewww," cringes Lucy. "You do realize we’re related to him." She plops down on her bed with a pile of books in her hands. I am not sure how she got into Gryffindor with her enormous brains.

"So, what exactly are we doing today?" I question my friends. It was a weekend after all, no classes.

"I have to do a spa day," Dom says, she begins spackling her face with a thick orange mask and her feet are already soaking in her bewitched foot spa.

"Research," mumbles Lucy under her mountain of books.

"I’m not really sure, probably going down to breakfast then to the library," says Juliet shrugging her shoulders.

"What for? Looks like Lucy already cleaned it out," Dom giggles from under her paste face.

I hear Lucy grunt in retaliation from her bed.

"Lorcan and Lysander are forcing me to go bloody Nargal hunting with them," groans Lavinia miserably. As much as she loves her brothers, they defiantly inherited their mother’s quirks.

I have four choices:

Spa day with Dom, not on your life. I’d probably end up looking like a deranged poodle.

Nargal hunting… this shouldn’t even be on my sane list of options.

Homework…not on a weekend, no thank you.

Leaving breakfast with Juliet.

"I’ll go with you down to breakfast Jules," I confirm, she squeals with excitement and rushes out the door ahead of me, bounding down the stars two at a time,

I had just piled my plate with food, grinning at the feast that awaits me. I pick up my fork, about to dig in when I feel a tap on my shoulder.

Who dared to interrupt my breakfast?

Albus Potter, that’s who.

"What?" I snap at him, impatient to get back to my highly anticipated meal.

"You are coming with me!" Al says a bit too brightly.

"Not on your life Potter" I hiss angrily.

Al looks around to make sure no one is in earshot, then leans close to my ear. "You really have no choice. Unless you want to relive last night, we need to plan for the plan."

"But I’m starving, I’m mad at you, and its Saturday, Slytherin practice isn’t utill Monday," I point out.

"Too bad, we need to get started." Al grabs my hand, pulling me off the bench, leaving my breakfast and Juliet behind.

Sorry about the length, I didn’t want to break it up. 

Thank you again for reading. Please let me know if you like how the series is progressing, a note, comment, or reblog. 

Cannot wait to post the next chapter, 

Em

[ayankun]

GOTHAM

insanely rambley HUGE spoiler-ridden seasons 1-4 thoughts under cut

FIRST OFF LET ME TELL YOU I GOT CHILLS

Secondly, let’s think back to how I felt about season one.  A little loose in the narrative, not so much weaving threads as having threads, ones that you keep expecting to pull tight but more often than not just get dropped for other, shinier threads.  All leading to a surprisingly effective character-driven season finale that hopes to prove to you that a few meandering plot points can still add to a sum greater than the parts.

(Oswald goes from umbrella boy to King of Gotham, Bruce Wayne starts at the site of his parents’ murder and ends up taking his first steps into the Batcave, Jim enters as this black-and-white idealist and winds learning from a mob boss that even good men sometimes get their hands dirty to get the job done.  A socially awkward unrecognized genius has a psychic break, leading ultimately to the fall of Edward Nygma and the rise of the Riddler.)

Season two is a blur.  A period of transition from Jim “Good Cop” Gordon Fistfighting Corruption into... Gotham City: Arkham Asylum’s Backyard.  Think how much season one was about only Fish Mooney vs Falcone vs the GCPD and Cobblepot doublecrossing everyone he meets, and how much seasons two and three and four were about the Riddler and Valeska and Tetch and Ra’s al Ghul (and Valeska).  We have the bring-everyone-back-to-life at Indian Hill period to thank for the sudden left turn into the Strange.

WHICH IS NOT A COMPLAINT.

There are so many types of Batman stories, and there’s a time and a place for both Joe Chill and Killer Croc.  Gotham started in one and always knew it was headed for the other.

And B.D. Wong as Strange is a DELIGHT and I really appreciated his dynamic with Miss Peabody.  Speaking of, the bomb defusing scene was a real gem omg lololol give the woman some damn water already.

At the same time, the Fish storyline was like WHOA what EVEN is haPPENINg at any given moment.  And it ultimately didn’t amount to much?  There’s so much waffling between the surviving gang camps where everyone’s either got a kill-on-sight order or a owed-life-debt to each other and the pendulum swings back and forth so quickly it’s not really worth holding onto how anyone feels about anyone else.  That dead/MIA character will come back or the rivalry will be revived or the long-held grudge will be recalled if and when that plot point is going to be drafted, but other than that everyone’s friends and that’s ok.

And like.  Ivy??? Ivy Pepper???????  Why is that ride so wild???  There is no cause and effect, only next next next.  It’s insane.  Maybe watching this all at once rather than over the course of four years lends a different perspective, but holy cow.  Such a ballsy way to do whatever with a character you never had a plan for.

Which brings us to Barbara Kean?!  Season one she was there because they knew she was a Mythos Character but then they were like, wait, whateven is she for though?  Which is a fair question, since having her be the Little Lady Trophy Fiance meant she was a boring and needless character wasting space, not standing on her own and hardly informing Jim’s character either.  So what to do, what to do.  How about we kidnap her, put her through some insanely cruel physical and psychological abuse, make her a psycho-revenge-bride, put her in a coma, have her come back as a 100% Arkham Villain, give her a hench(wo)man, have the henchman KILL HER, have Ra’s al Ghul waltz up out of literally nowhere and say “lol, borrow this arcane mojo for a minute, I’ll want it back later or will I” and now she’s a kingpin of Gotham’s underworld with her own mini League of Assassin?!!!!!!!   !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Like.  Even if they never had a plan going into it, I’m pretty okay with most of what they came up with.  Better than the lil wifey hanging out at home and having one passing remark about curating a gallery that we never saw and was never mentioned again.

Better off a once-crazy, once-dead mafiosa than the less inspired handling of Miss Kringle.  I won’t even get into that trainwreck I-only-exist-to-validate-manpain-of-my-murderer wait I said I wasn’t going to get into it.

So Nygma!  Like I said when I got started with the show, the season one Edward Nygma was crafted as this painfully unsympathetic offbeat loser and I think they fully succeeded with that characterization.  The emergence of the Riddler persona was a welcome change, an upgrade, a spit-shine into something clean cut and confident and stylish.  But I like that, compared to the Penguin, the posterchild for evil-psychotic-villain!Protaganist, for example, they held on to a lot of Nygma’s unlikeablilty in that he’s still an ass, even more of an insufferable egoist, and SO CRAZY he can’t even read himself (which was a big thing about the character before he split in half, so in itself that’s pretty great).

I don’t know.  Maybe you like him and I’m supposed to like him.  I think he’s exactly what he ought to be, and while I'd never want to see him marched off a peer with a bullet in his back, I’m more than happy to see his fellow villain-Protagonists knock him around once in a while.  Penguin and Mooney and now Lee (?!) and Zsasz even are the kind of villan!Protagonist you really root for.  But if it’s any one of them vs. the Riddler, they’re definitely not going to lose.  Nygma’s like in his own category of villain!Protagonist Antagonist.

Of course, the post-Arkham-proto-Riddler who was running Oswald’s mayoral campaign, now HOT DAMN that was a storyline I could get behind.  I almost actually believed they were going to do something great in the Nygmobblepot arena and that was a magical moment.  I think the resulting blood feud, as painful of a 360 as they come, was a sounder storytelling decision and more in line with the show’s Schroedinger’s Frenemies mentality.

And his season four storyline with the Ed Nygma persona challenging the Riddler was a nice full circle.  Sort of closing the gap between this raging banana nutball and the razor-sharp criminal mastermind he could be if tried.  Not SUPER THRILLED with his creeping on Lee but, with all due respect, that’s par for the character so again I say I don’t think I’m meant to like him??

I just spent half this rant on the Riddler so I guess they’re doing something right.

Ok so Cameron Monaghan’s VALESKA TWINS.  Let’s get right into it, shall we.

Holy smokes they did everything right on this one.  Loved the Primal Fear treatment of his introduction, and the way this random circus kid just so happens to start displaying jokey traits that astute viewers will start to suspect that this could be the big bad we’ve all been waiting for --

and then they kill him.

WOW

I was so ready for this kid to grow up to be the Joker, and they rip that dream away and replace it with an idea that anyone can grow up to be the Joker, and damn if that isn’t the nicest treatment of the character’s fractured and obfuscated origin story.  But.  THEN!

THEY BRING HIM BACK and it’s everything you wanted him to be.  He’s just so good.  There’s just the right amount of (IMO, anyway) Hamill-homage in what is otherwise a fully imagined Character who is instantly recognizable as one of many iterations but at the same time outclasses them all.  The high-level narrative and dialogue stuff, the stuff they create for him to do, I mean, is all great.  And then Monaghan brings this manic A++ game to the table and blows it out of the water.  Best Joker performance?  Arguably so, especially when you consider

JEREMIAH VELASKA because this kid can’t stop having stellar Joker performances.  He’s like, two and a half, three of the best Joker performances on the books.  Jeremiah’s distinct visual style, the characterization, AGAIN with the obfuscated we-are-legion origin story hocow.  NO COMPLAINTS HERE.

Anyway so if that’s what we get in return for sending Fish Mooney through a narrative meat grinder, then I guess it’s an even trade.

Pengiun.  What to say about Penguin.  I loved what they gave him in season two, a ton of character stuff because his plot stuff of rags to riches had played itself out.  I felt real bad for his mom, but I really liked that he went and made himself mayor, and even while his story arcs tend to go riches to rags and back again, it’s never not a pleasure watching him claw his way up to where he thinks he ought to be.

For the most part they do a good job stringing together these different Protagonist story-groups, keeping in mind that most of these groups serve mainly as antagonists amongst themselves (when they’re not being buddy-buddy to serve some winding end).  So when you get the villain!Antagonists you can really tell the difference.  I got a little yawny while we were setting up Fries, and by the time we finally locked Tetch up for good I was very grateful.  These will never be main characters and the show knows it and wants you to know it, too.  So while they’re the main on-screen villain, it can get a little stale because the same effort isn’t being put into their lasting appeal.

Um.  Jim Gordon.  Another thing I liked about season four was a strong return to GCPD bidniss.  Season two there was a lot of GCPD, but with Captain Barnes and the strike force and Galavan, so it was a completely different narrative animal than what Gordon was throwing down with in season one.  Then Gordon goes to prison and after that he doesn’t go back to GCPD until well into season three, and by then the story’s about Mario and Tetch and Lee and omg I forgot about Valerie Vale until this very moment whoops.

As was hinted in the season one finale, Jim Gordon went on a very twisty path through the mud before he figured himself out again.  Killing Galavan was like WHAT JIMBOY and that wasn’t even the worst of it.  What I liked most about his stint as a PI was the character’s eventual acceptance that the law isn’t the be all and end all of righteousness, and that there are other means available when enforcing peace and justice.  Not necessarily by killing every evil mayor you come across with your own two hands, but the eye-opening to the virtues of vigilantism is super important when you realize he’s going to be Batman’s main ally down the line and this time in his life is going to be what ultimately allows the future police commissioner to legitimize this kind of shadowy ninja behavior.

Anyway, in season four, Jim kind of comes back to roost at the GCPD, and finally ousting Bullock as Captain was rough but obviously warranted, and with only one season left that was a good time to do it.  Harper was a nice addition and I’d like to see more of her as a standalone character.  (Similarly, Fox has fit in nicely with the cops, but I’m not overly hankering to see more of his day to day antics.) 

What was my real point?  I really liked the Gordon vs the GCPD dynamics of season one, and while obviously that’s not a story you can tell forever, it did inform the sense that the police force is a living entity that can serve you very well if it trusts you, but before that can happen you really have to jump on its back and break its will LOL.

Also, remember Renee Montoya and Harvey Dent?  Yeah, I don’t either.

SO BRUCE WAYNE, MY FRIENDS.

Gotham is my very most favorite Bruce Wayne story, and much as Batman: TAS is my forever-reference for most Batmany things, Gotham is going to be my heart-canon for Bruce Wayne origins.

It’s one thing to say, “ok so this rich kid watches his parents get murdered in an alley, and from this moment on he vows to do something about it and makes himself a master detective/martial artist who puts on a mask and a cape and runs around at night smashing thugs’ heads in for justice” like it’s a foregone conclusion, a straight-forward A-to-B process, and a wholly other thing to show us, step by step, how he learns to become the thing we all know he’s going to become.

In season one he was this quiet, morose but driven child who didn’t know what to do with this crisis he’d been handed.  He’s a kid who sits in a pool with his whole clothes on, trying to hold his breath for as long as possible because he has no idea how else to become better prepared for handling his issues.  But he has Selina and he has Alfred and he has Fox and he has Jim Gordon, and he will have the Court of Owls and the Valeskas and Ra’s al Ghul who will all play a part in handing him pieces of himself until he has a full set.

He started with this strong sense of right and wrong, a deeply seated desire to put his talents and his money to some sort of use, an earnest diligence towards bettering himself in all ways, and little by little he gets shown just how much of a fragile and defenseless baby he is.  That time Alfred accidentally-on-purpose clobbered him in the eye -- that was the moment Bruce found out they’d all been pulling their punches with him and that he still had so so so far to go.

Of course, at the particular moment, he was going through a well-earned rebel without a cause phase (which will do him well when he calls on those behaviors for the benefit of a wider audience), so I don’t think that realization hit him at the time.  BUT I NOTICED.  Sure he’s got a bulletproof suit and he can look Jim Gordon straight in the eye now and he can fling himself off rooftops like a champ (and when Alfred gave him the keys to the Batmobile I cried a little), but he’s no Batman.  Not yet.  Not quite yet.

But you can see without a shadow of a doubt that he’s gonna be!  Instead of this “Bruce Wayne woke up as Batman” story, we get a look at all the day by day choices and experiences that inform, shape, and depend on Bruce Wayne’s core identity and the way that they will collectively create Batman.

Now, David Mazouz may not have the character acting chops of a Pinkett-Smith or a Taylor or a Monaghan, and he may not be as comfortable living in a everyday character like Pertwee and Logue do so effortlessly, but there’s a steeliness a Bruce Wayne should have, a hauntedness, an idealistness, that Mazouz emotes in spades.  Sometimes his Bruce Wayne does a stunt or pulls a pose that Mazouz KNOWS is Batman territory, and while his awareness of “I’m doing a cool thing look at me doing it” is a little distracting--it’s also SUPER EFFECTIVE and I fall for it hook, line, and sinker.

I’ve always been one of those fans who’s way more interested in the lives and characters of the secret identities (compared to the heroics of the super identities) so hot diggity dog is this the show for me.  All Bruce Wayne all the time.  When we he does put on the mask, it’s all the more powerful for knowing who exactly is wearing it and what’s driving him to do these borderline insane things.

Not 100% sold on Ra’s’ “I saw this in a dream” strong-arm prophecy, feeling like it steps on four years of Bruce Wayne’s self-determination.  Not 100% on how they introduced him and his aims and his baffling reincarnation(s).  But I am 100% on the pronunciation of “Ra’s” because I’m aware that Kevin Conroy et al figured it out somewhere between TAS and Arkham Asylum, but it’s something that they never quite got in Arrow.  (Oliver consistently uses “raysh” but everyone else is a grab bag between that and “rawz”.)

For that matter, David Mazouz consistently pronounces Ra’s with two syllables, so there’s also that.  Wait, hold on.  In Gotham they also draw a hard line between Ra’s al Ghul, the man, and “the demon’s head,” some sort of mystical power of time travel and flashlightiness.  Give one point to Arrow for not being that bizarre.

Long story short, the shot at the finale where Gordon’s waiting on the GCPD rooftop with the spot light and Bruce Wayne stalks up behind him was BEAUTIFUL.  (They also did the thing some episodes earlier where Bruce peaces out on Gordon when Gordon’s mid-sentence with his back turned and I laughed a lot)

Looking forward to their take on No Man’s Land.  Here’s a short story for you at the end of this long story:

One time I was reading No Man’s Land volume by volume from the library.  It was tough because I checked the first time and they had the full set, but then you never knew that the next one was going to be available when you went in for it.

So I get out of the car one day and look there’s a quarter on the ground.  Neat.  It’s mine now!

Going into the library, there was a cart of used books for sale by the door.  25 cents each.  Hell, I’ve got a quarter now, let’s see what they got.

What they got is the No Man’s Land novelization.  For 25 cents, or, in my case, free.

So I read that instead, and turned out I liked it way better than the source comics.  I have a hard time reading comics?  I tend to not look at the pictures, and certain art styles aren’t my jam.  Also when it comes to narrative capabilities, there are different tools and effects inherent to each form, and I appreciated the literary treatment and the internal voice it brought to the table that the comics couldn’t.

Also the author said in the note that his method was to sit down and jam out minimum 2000 words a day and that’s still a feat I admire.

Anyway, that’s my long winded take on Gotham.  Not perfection, but certainly a respectable and authoritative representation of a subject matter we all know and love.  I give it my second favorite Batman portrayal (behind Kevin Conroy and above Adam West) and my absolute favorite live-action Bruce Wayne, hands down.

[markwatkinsconsumerguide]

Consumer Guide / No.100 /  Singer Nina Clarke with Mark Watkins.

MW : Planet Of Women - what happened next?

NC : Well, as you know, there was a point where Planet of Women were really set to take off; we had a major publishing deal with Sony, signed by the same person, Charlie Pinder, who signed The Darkness, we played the Download festival twice to rave reviews, we were being regularly featured in Kerrang, were the first band to sing live on 6 Music (for Bruce Dickinson’s rock show) and were on tour with Thunder and then The Quireboys.

I think one of the main things that happened was that “Classic Rock” didn’t take off again the way the industry at one point expected. We were billing ourselves as a classic rock ‘Aerosmith meets The Supremes’ band, so I think the industry became nervous of pushing us.

In all honesty, it just kind of fizzled out. The big opportunities stopped coming, there were some we didn’t want to take (we were asked to be the featured band on T4 Sunday each week for example – it was something half of the band wanted to do and half didn’t so it was a difficult one, but I am glad we didn’t do it. It would definitely have made good watching for TV I am sure (!). Overall, I am not really interested in a reality TV car crash version of what we were; I want to be able to hold my head up high in public for one thing!

Probably, the final nail in the coffin was me becoming pregnant with my little girl, Isabella. I moved back to Solihull to be nearer my parents and then, despite intending to carry on, I think we all knew that the moment had passed.

I still keep in touch with everyone from the band (and I am now married to the drummer, Martin – which is funny because we weren’t all that close when I was in the band; we got to know each other many years later). Jolene lives not too far from me in The Midlands with her family and Jade and I chat regularly on social media. Pete, the guitarist, comes over every now and then and Jason the bass player’s wife, Trudi, who is a phenomenal band live photographer, has taken photos for me several times (one of her photos of my wedding is on my wall in my lounge!).

I have been very active musically since Planet Of Women (other than under lockdown!). I have travelled the world singing with my Abba Tribute Band, 21st Century Abba, and The Tarantinos (places including Mauritius, India, Libya), have albums of library music published (songs used for Heart FM, Friends on Comedy Central, Coventry University) and done a lot of session work too (including duetting a few times with Jamie Oliver, the celebrity chef).

Jade still performs mainly within London collaborating with fantastic musicians and still sounding great. I had the real pleasure of singing backing vocals for her at a jazz festival in Corsica twice, which was wonderful and just like old times (Pete and Martin were also there). Jade still has her phenomenal voice; she has such a unique style. She has been entertaining us all with live performances from home under lockdown. I owe Jade a lot; she taught me how to (as Wayne’s World fans would say) ‘wail’! I honestly wouldn’t be where I am today without learning from her.

Pete still writes songs constantly and his library music is used all over the world. We have collaborated on many songs together (as has Jade and Pete). Pete is a brilliant songwriter – he taught me a lot about how to create a good song and whilst I now mainly collaborate with other people, I always love working with Pete.

Jolene is the social media queen; she honestly should write a book from her blogs – they always make me laugh. She is the one pushing us to do a one-off Planet Of Women reunion gig for old times sake, which would be great fun.

Jason, the bass player, is an avid music fan and he and Trudi travel the UK and Europe to attend festivals and watch bands. Jason has recently picked up his bass again and started playing live, which is great to see.

Russ was the original drummer and he now is the drummer for Uriah Heap, touring the world.

Magic (Martin) the later drummer got the best deal of course, because he married me (ha ha ha... he will kill me if he reads this!). Martin has toured with Bewitched, The Bay City Rollers, Jo Harman and also tours with me with The Tarantinos and 21st Century Abba. He is also a lecturer at BIMM Institute Birmingham and does a lot of session work in our studio at home too. He is endorsed by so many brands (Sonor, Paiste for example) and is such a talented, versatile drummer.

MW : Tell me about backing Graham Bonnet...

NC : Ah, he was such a lovely man, he really was. Very humble and kind. I was very nervous to meet him because he was a real rock legend. Even though Rainbow were big before my time, I grew up listening to an Ultimate Rock Songs album which I played to death, and ‘Since You’ve Been Gone’ was one of my all-time favourite songs. 

Graham was so friendly when we met him; he really put us at ease and was fun to hang around with after the show too. I still have the caricature picture he signed for me saying I did a great job. I can’t tell you how amazing it felt to be singing backing vocals for him – something I will never forget!

MW : Do you have any favourite songs of Graham's?

NC : It has to be ‘Since You’ve Been Gone’ from 1979 – it’s an all-time classic! I really enjoyed ‘Night Games’ too; a song originally from 1981 that I hadn’t known until working with Graham.

MW : Tell me about your ABBA covers band...

NC : I have always been a huge Abba fan, in fact I think I may have been named after the 1970s Abba song ‘Nina, Pretty Ballerina’ (I always remember my uncle singing it to me). My nan had the Super Trouper album (released in 1980) and I used to play it every time I went to her house. I felt a connection to Agnetha on account of us both having naturally long blonde hair and I idolised the band.

Once I moved back to Solihull, to have my babies, I still wanted to be involved with live music and also needed Part Time work. I saw an advert for an Abba tribute band in The Stage and auditioned. I was very proud to get the part! 

Since then, I have switched Abba bands a few times. My Abba tribute band now, 21st Century Abba, was only set up last year by myself and Marcus, who was the Bjorn with me in a past Abba tribute band. In our previous Abba tribute bands we won the UK’s No.1 Abba tribute band at the National Tribute Awards by the Agents Association GB every year from 2013-2018. 

The only thing was that the keys weren’t live and the harmonies were on track, which always made us feel like a second rate band. So we set up on our own with a live keys player and myself and Indrija, who plays Frida, sing all the harmonies as Abba sang them, and it feels like we have raised our game. It's great fun – we travel all over the world (I have been to India, Mauritius, Libya to name but a few places).

I honestly feel so lucky to be doing this as a job.

MW : What covers are most requested by your ABBA fans?

NC : ‘Dancing Queen’ is the main song that people request - I don’t think we would be forgiven if we didn’t play that song in our set! Although perhaps that is because we pretend to finish the show and then it’s our big encore, so people start cheering for it when we go off stage. 

Honestly, it is so hard because there were just so many huge Abba hits and it really is impossible to fit them all into every show! We do try to ensure for a private booking that we play that person’s favourite song though.

MW : List in order of preference your Top 5 Tarantino films, and say something about your No.1 choice…

NC :

5 Inglourious B*stards (2009)

4 Jackie Brown (1997)

3 Reservoir Dogs (1992)

2 Kill Bill, Volumes 1 & 2 (2003 & 2004) 

1 Pulp Fiction (1994)

Wow, this is a difficult question!  I love them all! 

Pulp Fiction has been my all-time favourite since university – I had posters of John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson on the wall. It is such a clever film – the chronology of it is all over the place but it all ties together at the end – brilliant. I just fell in love with the way Tarantino, unlike any other film, adds detailed chat that is not necessary to the story of the film – the fact that assassins could be casually discussing cheeseburgers on the job is both hilarious and disturbing.

MW : Do you sing in the shower?! What songs?!

NC : Of course! The acoustics are fab!! I have always sung ‘Andante, Andante’, the Abba song from the Super Trouper album (it's actually a Frida song so shh!). It was always one of my favourite songs off the album and nobody had ever heard of it until Mamma Mia 2 came along recently. I was so happy that finally other people were also raving about the song!

I also sing ‘Crazy’ by Patsy Cline – a huge 1960s country hit. it was one of the first songs I had to learn in a function band I was in when I first moved to London.

MW : What was the last good book you read (or are reading)?

NC : I am a sucker for a good psychological thriller. Currently reading ‘Sleep’ by C.L. Taylor which I can’t put down (I am a bit of a bookworm!). Only a few weeks ago I read ‘1984′ by George Orwell; I knew so much about it, even watched the film, but hadn’t actually ever read it. Absolutely brilliant – so many films and books today have been influenced by George Orwell; fantastic!

MW : Any celebrities you keep in touch with, or are on your radar?

NC : Martin (my husband) was drumming for Bewitched for a while, and one of the twins, Keavy, came to our wedding. Dennis Stratton (of Iron Maiden) was also at our wedding as a joint Best Man too (along with Knuckles from The Tarantinos). It's funny because I don’t see them as celebrities; they are genuinely nice people and we consider them friends.

A few years ago, I was presenting The Black Country Rock Show for Guitarist TV and had the pleasure of interviewing people like Tony Clarkin (Magnum – see You Tube for the outtakes of our interview – we couldn’t stop laughing!), Brian Tatler (Diamond Head) and Al Atkins (Judas Priest). It was great fun and as part of that, I sang on an album, soon to be released. I sang lead on my version of ‘Still Got The Blues’ by Gary Moore, with Dennis Stratton on guitar, Harry from Thunder on drums, Nick from Magnum on Bass and Mike De Jaeger, my co-presenter on the show also on guitar. It was recorded at Mad Hat Studios in The Midlands and was great fun.

Luke from Thunder - at first I kept in contact with and he offered to write together on some songs, but, and I really regret this now, this offer came just as I had had my first child and I never did anything about it!

There was also talk of Planet Of Women doing backing vocals for The Quireboys again at their big shows in September 2020, although due to Covid 19, it looks like this now won’t happen, which is a real shame.

MW : What about meeting Jamie Oliver?

NC : The Jamie Oliver thing started when I met a music producer, Leigh Haggerwood, when I was performing a pub gig in London years ago. He said he liked my voice and then called me out of the blue to ask if I could do a piece of session work for him which I then found out was a duet with Jamie Oliver to be performed when he was the featured chef at The Good Food Show at the NEC (you had to pay extra for his show, which was in a separate auditorium, and he cooked to the song). Jamie was a drummer before he became a famous chef (funnily enough the bass player in The Tarantinos, Andy Tolman, was the bass player in their band) and so he wanted to incorporate music into his show.

The first song was a cover of Nelly’s ‘Hot In Here’ and was called ‘Cold Out There’. My main line was ‘I just love this soup, it really makes me hoooorrrrrnyyyyy’!! The following year I was asked to sing the duet again, and this time the song was about fish stew, and the main line was ‘I Wanna Fish Stew’. Yes, it was intended to be rude! The funniest thing was Leigh and Jamie sniggering like school kids while writing lines and then asking me to sing them. Jamie did a spoof You Tube video using the song (look it up!) and then for his 40th birthday the staff of all his restaurants lined the streets of London cheering him, and there was a gospel choir singing a gospel version of our song!

Around that time, I went to several of Jamie’s parties, both at his home and in local pubs. I went to a barbecue at his country home when they had only just bought it (which was filmed for The Naked Chef). I really got on well with his wife, Jules – she was so friendly and down to earth. And Jamie was just one of the lads – really good fun. I sang at Jules’ 30th birthday party too which was great fun.

I do have signed recipe books by Jamie, and I genuinely do love his recipes – they are perfect for me – really lovely food but not too posh or fiddly that you end up either failing or feeling hungry after! 

He really is a very talented chef and a really good guy.

MW : How good are you at Maths?

NC : Ha Ha! This may sound strange, given I am a singer, but I actually have a 1st class Mathematics and Business Studies degree from Warwick University, and I am also a qualified chartered Accountant! 

I was always very studious at school and even though I loved singing, I was too shy to really push myself. It was only when I went to university, joined a gospel choir (which I ended up running in my third year) and then set up a band that I started to really enjoy performing live. My first band, The Sally Gardens, were terrible when we first started out! We were all new to performing and our songs were very average. However, three years later (and a few changes of members) and I think we were really putting out some great songs. I was performing more and more solos with the gospel choir and I realised that I wanted to carry on singing even when I moved into the “Real World”.

I took an Auditing (Accounting) job in London mainly so I could be in the centre of London, and try to get into the music scene. I had all sorts of adventures before hooking up with Jade in Planet of Women.

After moving back to Solihull, I started working for Hilton Hotels in Finance (I am the main finance person for several hotels). People find it really strange that I have two very different, equally important jobs, but I think it is the perfect mix. I get the perfect balance between brain work and creativity, and I genuinely get to earn money from my two passions!

MW : What are you most looking forward to doing once ALL the Coronavirus restrictions are lifted?

NC : Of course, it has to be performing. We were lucky enough to do a theatre show on 14th March 2020, just before lockdown, but this now seems a lifetime ago! All of our festivals have been pushed back to next year and hopefully our dates abroad will get rebooked next year too. The very sad thing is that some of the venues that we were really enjoying working with have unfortunately had to close, which is really upsetting. I do hope that the government urgently helps venues so that they aren’t forced to close. I miss my Abba and Tarantino's families!

I will miss all the time I have had writing songs and doing session work though – it has been great to get really creative with writing. I have albums published with Justin Bryant through BMG (Teen Pop Sensation Deep East Music) and , as I touched on earlier, our songs were used to advertise Friends (yes, the comedy series with Rachel, Ross and Joey), Heart FM and Coventry University to name but a few, plus I am signed to Long Lunch Music in a collaboration called Sequoia (with Chris Garfield from Jimmy James and the Vagabonds and Marcus Tate from 21st Century Abba). 

We recently filmed a video (‘Where’s This Thing Going’ Sequoia – on You Tube) for one of our songs. The video was filmed under lockdown, which was great fun (although it's always embarrassing watching yourself on screen!).

MW : What have you learned most about yourself during lockdown?

NC : Hmm... at first I learned that I don’t have to rush around; that there is so much to enjoy right in front of my nose…the garden, my neighbours, chilling with my children (Izzy and Jack) and my husband. However, I must say, after three months, I started to get a bit stir-crazy….I do think I am built to work…if you know the famous poem, I am a Saturday’s child so I work hard for a living!

MW : Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?

NC : Ooh... great question! I would still love to be performing live (when it's good there is nothing like it) and travelling the world (never gets boring). I would also like to be writing more with my fabulous co-writers. The joy of getting the quarterly email from PRS (Performing Rights Society) to see where your songs have been used just never gets old.

MW : How can we keep in touch?

NC : I keep Facebook and Instagram private, but you can always reach me via my band websites :

www.21stcenturyabba.co.uk 

www.thetarantinos.com 

www.sessionvocals.co.uk

or the Facebook / Instagram sites :

https://www.facebook.com/21stcenturyabba/

https://www.facebook.com/TheTarantinoscom/

https://www.instagram.com/21stcenturyabba/

https://www.instagram.com/thetarantinosofficial/

(c) Mark Watkins / July 2020

[famouspeoplefromminneapolisyfiq7]

15 Terms Everyone in the Annual Events in Minneapolis Industry Should Know

Minneapolis Minnesota

Exterior destinations in Minnesota include Minnehaha Falls, a lovely

green area situated in the heart of Minneapolis. The falls are just one of

the main Minnesota destinations when seeing the Twin Cities. The

stretching home affords site visitors exceptional hill cycling tests,

hiking tracks, barbecue locations as well as several other activities.

Concerning Minneapolis

Exposed brick, hardwood floorings, gas fireplace, 3 panel doors, all-natural

woodwork, wonderful cooking area granite counter tops and stainless steel

home appliances, in an open layout with a facility island, upper level washing,

a brand-new high effectiveness heating system simply installed.

Famous Individuals From Minneapolis

Every huge city needs a place where residents and also visitors can unwind

and relax away from the stressful pace of the city. Lake Calhoun in

Minneapolis is just the area to go when you desire to settle back. Rent

paddle boats, swim, canoe, fish or simply sit by the coasts and also take pleasure in some

terrific people-watching!

The residence itself has actually been carefully looked after by the existing ownersand

boasts a practical flooring strategy with bunches of all-natural light, huge open

concept cooking area with stainless steel devices, breakfast buffet, & & a. terrific room with a wood-burning fireplace.

Lakes and reservoirs: Birch Pond (A), Powderhorn Lake (B), Lake Nokomis.

( C), Mother Lake (D), Lake of the Isles (E), Lake Hiawatha (F), Lake.

Harriet (G), Diamond Lake (H). Display/hide their locations on the map.

If you reside in Downtown, navigating in wintertime is never ever a trouble.

thanks to the skyway system. Connecting on the second floorings of all.

major downtown office as well as apartment, the skyway system is an.

cutting-edge hallway network allowing you to stroll for miles without ever before.

going outside.

Minneapolis, Mn.

The arts scene in Minneapolis is excellent as well as wide-ranging. One of the.

city's specialties is that it has more cinema seats per head than.

any type of city beyond New York, and the executing arts community in.

particular is as energetic as well as diverse as they come. Famous venues like.

the Guthrie Theater and also the First Opportunity Bar are just the pointer of.

the iceberg when it concerns live music, and the city's enormous network.

of museums (including landmarks like the Walker Art Center and also.

Minneapolis Institute of Art) is among the most effective in the USA.

This Minnesota attractions among the most fun leading educational.

centers to check out in the state. With displays such as The Globe of.

Sharks in 3D, as well as many multimedias displays covering subjects like biology.

as well as anthropology, the Scientific research Museum of Minnesota is an interesting location.

to check out.

Tourist attractions: Bill & & Bonnie Daniels Firefighters Hall & & Museum

.( 664 22nd Avenue Northeast) (1 ), Golden Wings Museum (8891 Flight Terminal Road.

Northeast Collection 6C) (2 ), Minneapolis Institute of Arts (Museums; 2400.

3rd Opportunity South) (3 ), Holy Land Exhibit (Museums; 434 Ridgewood Opportunity).

( 4 ), Hennepin History Museum (2303 third Avenue South) (5 ), Facility for.

Early Knowing & & Living of the Sciences (Galleries; 4139 Minister Method.

North) (6 ), Aminah Hair Sytlist (Museums; 7500 69th Method North) (7 ),.

Fridley Historic Society Gallery (611 Mississippi Street Northeast).

( 8 ), American Wings Air Museum (2141 Rhode Island Opportunity) (9 ).

Display/hide their approximate locations on the map.

Points To Do In Minneapolis.

Look into the Budweiser Roofing Deck before heading pull back to the.

playing field. The tour will certainly take you via the background of the Twins.

team, highlighting past as well as existing gamers, outstanding displays of.

baseball memorabilia, and also special ecological functions of the having fun.

area.

The exhibition intends to establish vital thinking skills through forensic.

investigation, scientific questions, and also modern technology, by offering a.

multi-sensory experience where visitors can look into the globe of.

crime scene examination.

St Paul Minnesota.

Complementing the home-away-from-home environment is a menu loaded with.

sublime mixtures from mouthwatering lamb scottadito to pillowy.

pan-fried gnocchi smothered in crumbly Parmigiano Reggiano. Open till 1.

a.m. on weekends, the place is always packed as well as getting a table is not.

easy, but absolutely worth the delay.

Minneapolis Minnesota.

Pop, rock and also indie songs acts execute, however it is not only arising.

artists as also bands with huge followings will play two evenings at.

First Avenue versus than one evening at a bigger place. Significant skills that.

have graced the stage consist of the Indigo Girls, Tina Turner, The Black.

Eyed Peas, Economical Method, Phish, and a lot more. A photograph with the wall of.

stars in the background is a must-do souvenir of Minneapolis.  

. Youngsters and also kids-at-heart will enjoy discovering these top 10 kid-approved.

stops in the Twin Cities. From epic dinosaurs and also indoor.

water parks to roller coasters and four-story interior backyard, there's.

no scarcity of family members fun.

Featuring an universal collection of over 80,000 items, extending.

5,000 years of globe background, the MIA is home to among the finest.

considerable art collections in the country, containing exceptional.

exhibits and collections of art from Africa, Oceania and the.

Americas, as well as a substantial collection of Oriental art as well as sculpture.

Romantic weekend trips near me, spring break, positions to live: Orange.

Area Beaches, New Zealand Beaches, Fairbanks, Aberdeen, Providence,.

Lake George, Leesburg, Niagara Falls, Richmond, Virginia Buying, Ann.

Arbor, Sausalito, Morrison, Puerto Rico Beaches, Athens GA, Portugal.

Coastlines, Zagreb Hotels.

23 Ideal Things To Do In Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Located on the west financial institution of the Mississippi River, beside Gold Medal.

Park and also the Mill City Gallery in midtown Minneapolis, the Guthrie.

Theater has won many awards for its design by Jean Nouvel as well as.

draws in visitors from around the globe to appreciate its architecture.

The theater houses three theaters with a signature ‘‘ thrust' phase, and a.

78-foot cantilevered bridge called the "Endless Bridge.".

Background Of Minneapolis.

The piano on the luggage case degree in Terminal 1 is not just for program.

Anyone is invited to play it; you might even be amused by a.

expert musician or talented child while awaiting your luggage.

Would like to know the very best areas in Minnesota? Exactly how around tips on just how to make.

one of the most of your time in a specific city? Our Minnesota experts can.

address your inquiries, provide guidance, or intend the ideal Minnesota journey.

for you. Free of charge.

MSP has a main 1.4-mile strolling path in Terminal 1, sponsored by.

the American Heart Organization. It's a healthy and balanced way to pass the time on a.

layover or to walk off some of that exquisite airport fare.

Things To Do In Minneapolis.

Everything regarding Manny's is impressive, from large pieces of.

meat offered with a collection of sides, to must-try decadent treats.

The restaurant flaunts a 300-bottle a glass of wine checklist, in addition to considerable.

reserve listing. If you are looking for one-of-a-kind day evening suggestions in.

Minneapolis, this restaurant is an excellent option.

10 Reasons To Discover Msp Flight Terminal.

The Walker relaxes opposite the Minneapolis Sculpture Garden, a sculpture.

park on the north side of the Walker School as well as is cooperation between.

the Walker and also the Minneapolis Park and Recreation Board. Housed in an.

architecturally magnificent building, the gallery is a must-visit.

Minneapolis' origins were as a mill community, first handling lumber, and.

then coming to be the biggest flour-producing city in the nation in the late.

19th as well as very early 20th centuries. Today the flour mills stand still, have.

been torn down, or converted to posh lofts, yet you can see a glance of.

that time at the Mill City Gallery on the bank of the Mississippi in.

downtown Minneapolis.

Two aviation-inspired play areas (one in each terminal) will certainly maintain the.

kids inhabited while you await your trip, as will certainly the.

tasty treats at Rocky Mountain Chocolate Manufacturing Facility. There's also.

private as well as luxurious nursing spaces for families taking a trip with children or.

mommies who need a silent area to pump, situated in both terminals.

The house for the Minnesota Twins is   at Target Area in the western side.

of downtown Minneapolis. The stadium is an al fresco ball park   as well as. received appreciation from ballplayers and also spectators for the seating, views,.

ambience, and giving ins alternatives. Going to a game is an ideal method.

to spend a balmy summer season night in the city prior to getting a beverage or.

bite after the ninth inning in neighboring midtown Minneapolis.

Romantic resorts, pet dog pleasant cabin, store inn, B&B, hostel, images,.

maps, discount rates, meeting, pairs retreat, tourist: Points to do in.

Miami, Miami with Kids, Best coastlines in Miami, Places to Go To in Miami.

on a Day, Miami fish and shellfish, Miami resorts, Finest time to go to Miami,.

Angling in Miami, Free Things to Do in Miami, Miami Nightclubs, Points.

to Do in Minneapolis, Free Things to Do in Minneapolis.

When you have registered, you obtain a vital or passcode, which you then.

insert right into the needed slot at one of the many bike stations across.

the city, obtain the thumbs-up as well as take your bike. You will certainly be provided a.

specific amount of time to utilize the bike, according to your pass or.

subscription, after which time the bike requires to be returned to any.

station. When the bike is locked into the station, your key or pass is.

gotten rid of, as well as you are good to go. Rapid, simple as well as cost effective, it's the.

perfect method to discover the city at your very own pace.

Weekend getaways, top 10 points to do, places to go to near me: South.

Padre Island, Lexington,, Erwin, Floyd, Essex, Biloxi, Erie,.

Dining establishments in Lancaster, Restaurants in Lake Tahoe, Empire, Eastham,.

Escanaba.

Rest in before your return flight and remain on-site at.

the   InterContinental Hotel. The 12-story hotel includes a day spa, 2.

signature restaurants, a penthouse mixed drink bar and a state-of-the-art.

gym.

Things To Do In Minneapolis.

112 Eatery is a well-known downtown restaurant that provides a laid-back.

atmosphere, superior service, and also amazing cuisine. Award-winning cook.

Isaac Becker has produced this comfy spot where the wood floors as well as.

subjected block wall surfaces appear like a comfy apartment or condo rather than a.

narrow restaurant, making it the perfect go-to place for a decadent supper.

or late-night bite.

Found within the Mall of America, the Nickelodeon World is the.

globes biggest interior theme park.   The grounds have greater than 50.

rides, suitable for young and also older kids—— from knotting coasters, like.

Shredder's Mutant Masher,   to even more smooth standards, like an antique steed.

slide carousel.  

. Pop right into locally established Aveda to example some items, get a pre-flight.

adjustment at The Chiroport, or relax and delight in a premium footwear shine.

You can even obtain a full mani/pedi, hair styling and face treatments at.

XpresSpa; no consultation essential.

Dating back to the 1870s, the mill complex is detailed on the National.

Register of Historic Places and becomes part of the St. Anthony Falls.

Historical District, playing an important role in the conservation as well as.

education of the state's heritage.

Diving certified scuba divers can endure the waters and dive with sharks, while.

other site visitors can join feeding times with stingrays,.

seahorses, and rainbow coral reef fish. The aquarium uses an array of fun.

sea-based tasks as well as adventures for all, including stamp terminals.

with dive publications for children, behind-the-scenes scenic tours and also over night.

stays.

Enchanting areas near me this weekend, all inclusive, real-time songs, unique.

buying in town, night life for vacationers: Whistler, Shanghai, South.

America Cruises, New Zealand Cruises, Ireland Cruises, Winnipeg,.

Beijing, Paris hotels, charming Niagara Falls, Things to Do in Ghent,.

Brussels, Nepal, Finest European vacation, Arizona Day Trips, Cincinnati,.

Best place to remain in Grand Teton, Adelaide.

Famous People From Minneapolis.

Established in 1963, the Guthrie Theater is a center for movie theater.

performance, production, education and learning and also specialist training with the.

goal of revealing and also attaching target markets to classic literary works as well as brand-new.

jobs from diverse societies around the globe.

10 Reasons To Explore Msp Flight Terminal.

Minnesota's prospering regional food scene greets site visitors as quickly as they.

touch down at MSP, where a lot of Minneapolis-St. Paul's best cooks and.

restaurateurs have actually opened up store. Please your internal foodie with.

alternatives like coal-fired pizza at Outcast, fresh sushi at PinKU,.

regional craft beer from Stone Arc or a Tattersall craft alcoholic drink from the.

Cocktail Area at 18th &   & Central.

Hing on the banks of the historic Mississippi Riverfront as well as constructed.

into the damages of what was as soon as the globe's largest flour mill, known as.

the Washburn "" A"" Mill, Mill City Museum is a small, intimate museum that.

presents birth and also development of Minneapolis and the subsequent history of.

the expanding city with the flour sector as well as the river.

For foodies (and those with food allergies) Bryant Lake Bowl uses.

in your area sourced grub as well as a gluten-free food selection. Searching for a task.

prior to playing a video game? The affixed cinema to Bryant Lake also hosts.

everything from plays, regional musicians, as well as also a weekly church service.

Minneapolis-st. Paul Location.

First Method is a veritable icon of Minneapolis. Once the midtown.

Minneapolis Greyhound bus depot, the structure was redesigned in 1970 right into.

a real-time songs place by tearing everything out, adding a phase, an audio.

system, and painting the entire place black. The location has genuine.

music cred— — Royal prince executed below in the early days of his occupation.

Things To Do In Minneapolis.

The Double Cities' reputation as a hub for arts is mirrored throughout.

MSP. Numerous mosaics decorate both routs, the flight terminal organizes an.

yearly staff member art show and competition, and a trio of Snoopy statuaries makes.

for a fun scavenger search.

Sitting as well as enjoying an elegant mixed drink is great—— learning just how to make that.

expensive mixed drink at home is also better. The specialists behind the bar at the.

Norseman Distillery disclose their tricks of the profession throughout classes at.

their Mixed drink Laboratory each month. The sessions come with hands-on.

guidelines, recipe cards, as well as 3 tastings.

The aquarium flaunts a 1,500 gallon Pacific Northwest Rockpool where.

site visitors can discover unusual sea animals such as cucumbers as well as sea.

polyps by touch, in addition to a 300-foot glass underwater tunnel for.

memorable sights of sharks.

Minneapolis Minnesota.

Initially run by General Mills, the mill blew up and also caught fire.

a number of times during its functioning life. When abandoned, an almost.

tragic fire ruined a lot of the mill. The Minnesota Historical.

Facility finally took cost of the remains, which were maintained and also a.

museum was developed inside the ruins. The gallery is one of the ideal areas.

to explore the history of Minneapolis.

Yearly Occasions In Minneapolis.

From hip children to rich specialists, the trendy stores in Uptown.

Minneapolis hosts the facilities they such as to constant. Stylish bars,.

restaurants, ​​ and also stylish shops are collected around the intersection of.

Hennepin Method and Lake Road, the heart of Uptown Minneapolis. If.

people-watching is the goal, order a seat at one of the local coffee.

shops and also appreciate the parade of fashionistas passing by. The location is a.

number of blocks from Lake Calhoun, where the gorgeous people go to.

sunbathe in the summer season, as well as run or rollerblade around the lake.

Destinations & & Tasks.

Weekend journeys, what is a fantastic day journey destination: Things to Do in.

Mauritius, Ukraine, Hong Kong, Myrtle Beach Day Trips, NY with Kids,.

Nevada with Kids, Oklahoma with Children, Day Trips from Omaha, Marquett,.

Greenbelt, Grantsville, Malvern, Hot Springs, Middletown.

Famous People From Minneapolis.

The Minneapolis Institute of Arts is the major art gallery in.

Minneapolis, with pieces covering numerous centuries from throughout the.

globe. Functions from classical times via modern-day art fill this vast area,.

where it's very easy to get lost for an entire day. The gallery has a variety.

of special programs, ranging from drawing courses for youngsters to a.

weekly alcoholic drink and art night each Thursday.

St Paul Minnesota.

Izzy's Gelato is an ice lotion establishment, with stores in Minneapolis.

and St. Paul. Possessed and taken care of by Lara and Jeff Sommers, what began as.

a tiny kitchen area offering hand-made gelatos has expanded into the city's.

favorite ice cream place.

10 Reasons To Discover Msp Flight Terminal.

"" New trendy stuff to do in Minneapolis, Minnesota"" Back to Top or Romantic.

Getaways, Wedding celebration Suggestions near to me this

[sciatu]

La teoria della relatività e i Siciliani. 

Perché mi chiedi di fare una cosa domani? o di prendere una decisione “adesso” aspettandoti una risposta “ora”? Le tue richieste non sono sicilianamente relativistiche! Prendi i miei colleghi stranieri che mi mostrano le loro agende dove minuto per minuto è tutto programmato per interi mesi, mentre nella mia magra agenda c'è solo qualche nota fra qualche mese per ricordarmi un improbabile impegno già sfumato.  Il punto è che noi siciliani abbiamo una teoria della relatività tutta nostra. Addirittura nella nostra lingua esistono solo due tempi principali: il passato remoto e il presente. Il futuro è espresso al presente aggiungendo quando l'azione si fa. Cosi per dire “partirò” diciamo “domani parto”. Se qualcuno ci chiede di fare qualcosa, rispondiamo “ora, ora” come per dire che stiamo valutando la cosa seriamente e che prima o dopo la faremo, senza definire il tempo quando sarà svolta perché per noi siciliani il futuro, inteso come l’istante, del giorno o del mese che viene dopo di adesso, non esiste mentre il passato è qualcosa di ormai lontano e remoto anche se l'azione è stata fatta due secondi fa. Siamo prigionieri di un eterno presente, di un adesso che guarda all'indietro ma mai al futuro. Se ci pensi però tutto questo segue fedelmente la teoria della relatività di Einstein; infatti secondo la relatività se di due fratelli gemelli uno partisse per le stelle e l'altro lo aspettasse sulla terra, quest'ultimo invecchierebbe più velocemente del fratello astronauta, così quando si ritroveranno uno avrà qualche anno in più di quando è partito mentre l’altro sarà vecchissimo. Ognuno di loro due ha avuto un suo “Domani”: per uno è arrivato, mentre per l’altro deve ancora arrivare, quindi solo il presente è immutabile, il resto è relativo, dipende da come lo affronti. Ne consegue che alla fine la propria vita è determinata dal proprio presente, che ognuno ha un proprio tempo e che quindi ognuno segue solo il suo tempo e invecchia o resta giovane indipendentemente dagli anni che passano. Al giorno d'oggi invece siamo tutti schiavi di un Tempo globale padrone di tutto e di tutti, che con scadenze, budget e rate, non è mai abbastanza. Un Tempo impietoso che riveste di ansia il “domani” e di angoscia il presente, mentre in realtà il presente è qualcosa di immutabilmente sereno. In conclusione seguite tutti il vostro tempo e del domani futtitibinni perché tanto non esiste. Lo dice la teoria siciliana della relatività!

Why do you ask me to do something tomorrow? Or make a decision “today” waiting for an answer “now”? Your requests are not in line with the Sicilian relativistic theory! For example, take my fellow foreign colleagues: they show me their agendas where minute after minute everything is planned for months, while in my lean agenda there is only a few notes in a few months to remind me of an unlikely commitment already deleted. The point is that we Sicilians have our own theory of relativity. Even in our own language there are only two main times: the remote past and the present. The future is expressed by the present by adding when the action is done. So to say “I’ll leave” we say “tomorrow I leave”. If someone asks us to do something, we answer “now, now” as if to say that we are seriously considering it and that before or after we will do it, without defining the time when it will be done, because for us Sicilians the future, understood as the instant ,  or the day or the month that comes after now, does not exist ! While the past is something far away and remote even if the action was done two seconds ago. We are captives of an eternal present, we can look to the remote past but never to the future. However, if you think about it, everything follows faithfully the theory of Einstein’s relativity; In fact, according to the relativity, considering two twin brothers one staring for the stars and the other waiting on the earth, the latter would grow older than the astronaut brother, so when they meet together again, one will have a few years longer than when he left, the other will be very old. Each one of them had one of his “Tomorrows”: for one came, while for the other he must still arrive, so only the present is immutable, the rest is relative, depends on how you faces it. From this consideration, it follows that at the end, our life is determined by our own present, that each has its own time and that therefore each one follows only his time and grow old or young regardless of the years that pass. Nowadays, however, we are all slaves of a Global Time, master of everything and everyone, which with deadlines, budgets and rates, is never enough. A pitiful time with anxiety on the “tomorrow” and anxiety about the present, while in reality the present is something immutably serene. In conclusion, follow all your time and about tomorrow fuck it, because it does not exist. This is according the Sicilian theory of relativity!

[random-meee]

Camping

A/N: I apologize for the crappyness but I just came from Hong Kong to Brasil so a 49 hour travel from door to door. I chickened out of the one I intended to do and I mentioned before, I will try to put up a birthday special for our dear Simon Snow but I have a lot of family to see so the updates might slow down. Either way,enjoy!

Baz Daphene had invited Simon and I to go camping along with my siblings and father, I was hesitant to agree at first as I didn’t know how Simon would react but once I talked to him he was all for it saying he had never been camping and it’d be a great idea to get to know my family more. So Simon and I went camping along with my family.

Mordelia and (Baz’s other sibling names) seem to be quiet fond of Simon, hanging of his wings and tugging his tail as we hiked up to the camping site. He looked like he was having just as much fun as they were he was laughing and smiling, I couldn’t help but admire him, trees creating shadows in his face as the sun shine through to his skin and his eyes were so vibrant. I was brought out of my thoughts by my father “Basilton, are you sure it’s…wise to bring along Simon Snow? Especially with those wings he has” I sighed my father still chooses to ignore the fact that I’m queer therefore he’s always complaining about Snow, as if he were a friend he’d prefer I stayed away from “Father we’ve already discussed this, Simon’s wings and tail  have been charmed so normals won’t see them.” I call him Simon in front of my father just to piss him off really, but I wasn’t lying Bunce had found a spell that makes normals simply overlook his wings only seeing him as a boy while mages see the truth. Once we arrived at the site, Snow seemed out of breath and the little ones were laughing as for them who do this on eve a month, it was. nothing more then a walk on the park. “Baz… What do we do now?” I suppressed a laugh at his state.

Simon I’m not fucking fit, I never really was. Sure I could swing a sword for hours and run like hell is I needed to in a fight, but that was it all the things that would make me ‘fit’ was just adrenaline and the need to stay alive. Therefore I was heaving an panting by the time we got to the site, the little kids laughed and when I asked Baz what to do next I could see he was trying not to laugh as well before he answered “We build the tents of course” as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I mean maybe it was for someone who has been camping before and knows what the fuck they’re doing. Either way Baz chose a spot for his and mine tent and threw me a bag in which I guessed contained the tent. I got it out of the bag and looked at the complicated pieces, how the fuck is this suppose to end up somewhat like a living space? This time I really did hear Baz laugh and I would’ve glared if his laugh wasn’t so adorable and if his father wasn’t watching of course. He walked over to me hugging me from behind, as he laughs in my ear I couldn’t help but smile. Baz loves doing gay stuff in front of his father which usually means the whole family as well but I don’t mind, the little kids giggle while Daphene pretends to be busy his father glares. “Simon, go get the sleeping mats and other things to set up inside while I put the tent up” I didn’t have to be told twice I got our bags which we had left near the circle of rocks which I was told was for the campfire. Baz had chosen a clearing al little further from the others more into the trees, I guessed it was because it’d be easier for him to hunt or he just wanted to be further away. By the time I dropped the bags the tent was up and Baz was already helping me take in the stuff. It was a three or four person tent so we not only had space for ourselves but my wings would t need to be as cramped up. At night we had a campfire, Baz was hunting so I was left alone with his family meaning I busied myself entirely with the kids trying to avoid his fathers glare at all costs. Baz arrived just in time for marshmallows. “Who wants to hear a scary story?” He asked taking his seat next to me, the kids raised their hands faster than lightening all screaming 'I do’ over and over as if it’d make a difference “long ago in these exact woods lived an old lady along with her two grandchildren. Mia and Lilly, identical twins loved to help their grandma get her food -” Baz was interrupted by one of his sibling (I think his name was jack) “Boring!” I wasn’t surprised when Baz sneered and with a stern voice replied “wait.” Before continuing with the story “they would go out into the woods looking for campers anyone really, they would go up to these people put on pouty faces and ask 'Please help us we’re hungry and need to eat’ now who would decline food to two lost and starving 8 year olds so when they said their yeses the two would show their true selves. Long silver claws, and scaly green skin with long pearly white fangs ready to attack, they would then jump ripping the poor people to shreds. They’d take the shreds to their sweet grandma who’s probably already boiling the water as we speak” there was a silence before Baz made a loud hissing noise while baring his fangs. Me, the kids and Daphene all jumped while his father merely flinched, I slapped Baz on the arm as he laughed at our reactions. I helped clear up and said good night to everyone before reassigning to my tent. I tried and I tried to sleep but I just couldn’t, there was something wrong, after an hour I figured it out. It was to quiet, I was raised in the city where it was never really quite and even at Watford I could still here the merewolves and naiads, after another bit of thought I got up and went to Baz’s tent “hey, hey Baz. Are you awake?” I whisper asked “what is it Snow?” He groaned sitting up, his hair was messy and his eyes only half open “I-I can’t sleep” I mumbled, he sighed “Snow the horror story was fake there’s nothing to wo-” “No, no, no. It’s not that… it’s just…it-it’s too quiet” he gave me a confused and I was about to just give up when he called me back “Simon. Come here, you can sleep here for tonight tomorrow we can figure something out” I nodded crawling in beside him and snuggling up to him, he put his chin in my hair and wrapped his arms around me, “thank you” I whispered before falling asleep to the familiar sound of Baz breathing and the comfort of his arms.

[aromatickindling-blog]

Hmm, I’ll sort this out into the Stardew Valley Farmer as villager prompt with visuals and less words one day...

Green

Appearance:

    Green's an average sized young woman with minty hair tied up into a messy ponytail, part of her side swept bangs awning her sharp aquamarine eyes. If you're observant, you can see slight bags under eyes, covered with foundation powder to avoid questions from people. Her wardrobe's quite functional, filled with different boots for all occasions, thick working gloves, shade hats, winter fur caps, and cargo pants in different neutral colors, working well with her cotton button jackets. Her favorite happens to be the dark green formal jacket with a popped collar. The equipment she carries on her hip belt is well-taken care of, polished to the nines before being covered in all sorts of filth. She does have a strong liking for long scarves, goggles, and small, subtle hair pins, though.

    For some reason, her freckles tend to appear in curves and triangles; she has one that looks similar to Orion's Belt that she brings up as a conversation piece if she has to do small talk. Of course, she does take pains to cover up the scars she's gotten from her spelunking adventures in the mines and the Skull Dungeon. A Serpent pack left a particularly nasty one stretching down her left calf to her ankle. She prays to Yoba no one notices.

Summary:

    An ambivert erring on the side of introverted behavior, Green's the one of the twin grandchildren of Stardew Valley's previous farmer, come to take over Smaug farm. Thanks to years of neglect and her grandfather's 'brilliant' idea of staking land in a wilderness full of monsters, she's got her work cut out for her. Worse yet, with the Gotoran-Ferngill Republic conflict in full swing, she's especially reluctant to open up to anyone in the Valley. However, with the Adventurer's Guild and the Museum in town, she'll be able to settle in. Yet if anyone bothers getting to know her well enough, they might detect a hint of loneliness in her eyes.

At her Grandfather's grave, Green has planted an orange tree and told him:

    "If I can't see myself becoming part of the community here, Grandpa, I'll at least keep my part of the deal. I'll make sure the farm is up and running smoothly by the end of the second year. If the war continues...if Sage isn't back home here at that time, and I'm still unable to find someone I can trust here...I'll come after him. I'm sorry Grandpa, but I hope you can understand me on this. Mayor Lewis can take over the farm; it'll be a great source of revenue for Pelican Town...they'll need it more than I do. But thank you...for giving me an out from my former job. It was suffocating."

...For some reason, every Friday and Sunday Green never fails to greet the traveling cart merchant. Apparently, the two exchange letters; strangely, the writing doesn't match the merchant's personal chicken-scratch. After the bus has been repaired, you might even catch a glimpse of her with a strange bodyguard speaking about a "Mr. Qi." Who is this Mr. Qi, anyway?

Love: coffee, hazelnuts, goat cheese, poppy, fairy rose, dinosaur egg, all fossils and bone artifacts, duck feather, thunder egg, all soups, bone flute, mead

Likes: all flowers, all fruit, dried starfish, ornamental fan, ancient sword, fiddlehead fern, all dwarf scrolls, iron bar, copper bar, maple bar, lava eel, void salmon, honey, garlic, hot pepper, cloth, arrowhead, wine

 Dislikes: truffles, truffle oil (don't ask), super cucumber (once again, don't ask), beer, pale ale, morel mushroom (she's reminded of that one frog with all the holes in its back. And bot flies, the spawn of the underworld)

Hated: wicked statue, skull brazier, elvish jewelry, prehistoric hand axe, golden mask, Robin's axe

Personality:

    Green's the quiet observer of the twins, almost akin to a shade behind her brother's bombastic front. She's not the type to normally initiate conversation either, so only when she is required to, when she wants to give advice, or when she needs information will she, reluctantly, start one with a person. She's very polite about it too. But, you may have found her committing a social faux pas during the first year when she climbed on everyone's houses for a bird feather or little critter. Mayor Lewis chewed her out harshly for it. From then on out, it was only natural cliffs, rock faces, and trees she would climb onto, if not her own farm buildings.

    She is often found doing work on the farm, at the museum with Gunther, or training with Marlon at the Adventurer's Guild during the day, almost always with a cup of coffee and the occasional maple bar. Once Smaug farm is up and running, she does build a small training arena in front of the greenhouse. Don't ask why. When evening arrives, she disappears into the mountains and doesn't return home until 1:00 am in the morning. Some days may involve her leaving for Calico Desert early in the morning until 1:00 am. Shane often swears he would see blood leaking out of her when she was returning home at night. No one believes him thanks to how well Green dresses her wounds. This can only last so long with how she's burning the candle on both ends. On the weekends, no one is capable of tracking her down while she's out on her foraging hikes, much to her relief. Even better is during those evenings when everyone is at Gus's Saloon, when she can sneak into the Community Center to repair it with the Junimos before going home to refine sketches, put away gathered inventory, and generally wind down for the night with a tune from her harp, a nice hot soak, and a quick gaming session. Only on Sundays does she dare oversleep to offset the lack of it during the weekdays.

      Once more comfortable with people, she becomes more straightforward with her answers, although any questions regarding her family or her spelunking episodes are deflected or redirected to another topic. Outgoing villagers are more likely to get to this point. Snarky jokes will be made about the topic at hand, light teasing may occur if she is addressed directly, and, if it pops into her head, a few puns. Don't ask about her hikes or finds, she will become quite detailed with the scientific basis for everything she came across.

    Yoba help her if any of the single townsfolk become interested in her. Poor Green won't know what to do with herself, all her secrets might be spilled into the public square with that kind of relationship. What should she do now, how much of her activities should she cut back to spend time with them, what will they think of her once they find out what she's been trying to hide from the villagers, will their relatives approve of her, how long before they find out about her hiding her wounds from plain sight, do they like mint breath or coffee breath, are they allergic to poppies and fairy roses, will they mind her fossil collection, should she pick up cooking again, video game nights or movie nights, are they up for hiking, are they not okay with PDA, do they like cuddling, will they not mind her wrapping her arms around them as a greeting, do they like nuzzles, nape kisses, why her, and why are they even interested at all?! THESE ARE ALL IMPORTANT QUESTIONS...at least in her mind, they are. This is why she comes off as aloof, not only as a deterrent for anyone interested, but also as a result of her trying to strangle any feelings of affection that might develop for anyone else. Also, Yoba help the poor sap that does start to develop a crush on her; her lack of self-care and time during the weekdays is sure to wear on them.

    But, she is more than willing to make adjustments for them should they accept her, all of her. Green's probably going to ask them to come out to the beach at night near the solitary rock to spill her heritage as a half-Gotoran, half-Fergillan to them, mental escape routes calculating in her head but another part of her pleading this will be okay and she's just paranoid. From there, if accepted, she will tell about her brother and her parents, how Sage left for the army after a nasty spat with her regarding the Gotoran conflict, how her Gotoran Father died for helping the Ferngillan side, and how her Ferngillan Mother's MIA, probably in an underground resistance movement against the Gotoran government. She's only had her brother as a social crutch before he left, and it's the main reason why she bottled herself up. Why bother with people if all they're going to do is break your heart once you're close with them? But, she'll admit she was wrong, and then apologize for unloading all of this onto to them, and for not trusting them as much before. From there, she'll become more and more honest to them about her activities.

    The letters she was swapping with the merchant happened to be correspondences with her brother, usually curt and to the point. She makes it a priority to leave out any bitterness from his leaving her since he's in danger and needs all the help he can get. As for Mr. Qi...money is great and so is spelunking. That's all I'm going to say, other than it's a dangerous profession that has left her with a number of gashes...all of which she's refused to go to Harvey's for, much to her partner's dismay. As for the music drifting near the railroad tracks at night, it was her playing a couple tunes her father taught her on her mini-harp. She might even offer to serenade them from time to time.

    Despite her insecurities about herself, Green's quite the affectionate lover, offering sweet words in their ear, leaving small gifts for them after she visits their house, engaging in conversations more often with them, and giving out subtle public displays of affection, whether it be the joining of their hands, brushing their shoulders clean, a lingering look, or a soft caress on the back of their hand if they're slightly agitated. It's still quite confusing to her what to do and she'll hesitate early on about it, but she'll slowly ease into it...and wonder how the hell did this happen??? Then not care and nestle in close to them at night after pressing a kiss to their neck. Grandpa works wonders in keeping his grandchild in Stardew Valley. What a magnificent bastard he is.

Inventory:

·         Mini-harp

(You can hear the notes of a melody off near the mountaintops during the night, drifting down onto the railroad tracks...)

·         Obsidian knife

(A memento of her brother, before he left for Gotoro. Held closely to the hip, sometimes the chest whenever she thinks of him. It's as though the essence of the sea has imprinted onto this knife.)

·         Lava katana

(Can't go wrong with cauterizing deliberate wounds on monsters. Makes it less messy! Smells horrific...)

·         Herb satchel

(Most remedies have plant-based compounds to thank for their use. After trips to the mines or the Skull Dungeon, its strangely lighter. Smells strongly of mint.)

·         Pack

(Contains most essentials, from food to water to tools and, of course, a loaded first-aid kit. Got to be prepared for all sorts of insanity the spirits bring about when they're angry. For some reason, the pack smells of pine needles.)

·         Sketchbook

(Contains all sorts of colored sketches of landscapes, plants, monsters, rocks, animals, and even pressed flowers...wait...some of the villagers are sketched in here too? Has a light floral scent.)

[edge-hill-university]

Words As Weapons

Liverpool poet Malik Al Nasir is a revolutionary. And he wants us to join him.

We’re not necessarily talking about violent struggle, political upheaval, a world in crisis. Rather, we’re following the words of Malik’s spiritual guide and mentor, the late Gil Scott-Heron, who famously said that “the revolution will not be televised”.

Revolution will happen the moment you turn away from your tv, get off the sofa, and grab hold of your own destiny with both hands:

“The beginning of the revolution is when you change your mind,” says Malik. “If you're in a position when you can actually decide that a given thing, or way of being, or way of thinking, or way of behaving is just not acceptable to you, then you change it.”

As part of the University’s Black History Month programme, Malik has been discussing his own history as a black person growing up in Liverpool in the 1970s and 1980s, and the pivotal moments in his life that led him down the twin paths of performance poetry and civil rights, culminating in a performance, with his band the O.Gs, as part of a night of music and performance in tribute to the late poet, musician and civil rights activist Gil Scott-Heron.

His journey from Mark T Watson, born in Toxteth in 1969, to Malik Al Nasir, poet and performer, is best told by the man himself in his film Word Up From Ghetto to Mecca. But very briefly, Malik had a troubled childhood, spending much of it within a care system that didn’t really seem to care at all.  Having been excluded from school, from formal education, for a substantial period of his young life, he found multiple barriers to education: “I was semi-literate at 18 with no prospects.”

A revelatory backstage encounter with a touring Gil Scott-Heron in Liverpool’s Royal Court Theatre started the process of removing those barriers as his eyes were opened and he glimpsed his own potential. Gil’s kind words were backed up by kind actions, when Malik eventually joined Scott-Heron on the road as part of his crew.  This led him to Jalal Nuriddin of legendary artist-activists The Last Poets, who provided a critical commentary during the height of the civil rights era in the US, and is regularly referred to as the grandfather of rap.

These experiences were life-changing. They mentored him, educated him, nurtured his natural gift for language, encouraged him to articulate his thoughts, and to always be honest. They helped a “semi-literate” Malik find his way, and his own voice.

“Gil Scott-Heron and Jalal Nuriddin’s [poetry was] borne out of people trying to find a voice for the people who had no voice and were excluded from the mainstream media narrative, and that was the black people in the ghettos of America during the civil rights era, and that was part of the black arts movement. I met those guys and they mentored me, and through that process I was able to develop a skillset that enabled me to enter higher education.”

Education was the key, then, but Malik knew he had to help himself:

“I was motivated by the fact that once I’d acquired the skills to be able to enter academia I could elevate myself as an individual, against all the odds, because the people who were in the situation I was in, I think, were largely written off by society. I fought against that narrative, and I subverted that by devoting a lot of time to self-education, to just sit down, and - not even subject specific - literally reading and writing, initially doing creative writing, writing poetry, writing rhyme, writing songs, playing with words.”

Malik went to university, got a degree, got a Masters. But he didn’t study the English language. He was seeking knowledge, insight, not necessarily the rules of the game. Having the confidence to play with language is sometimes the result of not knowing the rules, and Malik cites the way children learn to speak as an example of how we use language effectively and creatively without possessing the grammatical nuts and bolts. Another example is grime music, he says. It “will always connect with people”, and when it is academically deconstructed “in years to come, I'm sure they'll find things in it, whether from a musical or linguistic standpoint that actually surprises them. Because something can be right but technically wrong.”

Malik’s approach to his art, as with all art forms, is ultimately about freedom to experiment and to push things forward. Not being told what you can do, just doing it, and letting everyone else catch up.  Rules are designed to constrain, but to ignore them, or even perhaps to not know they exist, is liberating, and has signalled great artistic leaps forward as far back as Shakespeare, and beyond: “It's in the breaking of those conventions that the magic happens,” he says.

His subversive approach produced his first book of poetry Ordinary Guy (as Mark T Watson, his name before he converted to Islam), and subsequent album Rhythms of the Diaspora Vol.s 1 & 2, which featured the poetry from Ordinary Guy delivered over a wall of percussive sound.

Malik’s inspiration for this radical sonic approach was once again his mentors, who would, back in the day, recite their poetry on basketball courts accompanied by a simple percussionist. He took a similar approach, but used the full array of percussive instruments – no stringed, brass or wind instruments. Only the human voice and natural effects – water flowing, wind blowing – were allowed. His production team were initially thrown by his approach “but the result was something that all who'd been involved felt proud of and inspired by. Because they were working with conventional wisdom they would never have ordinarily gone down that route because they were constrained by convention, I'm not.”

It’s a great message – and story - for all students of the creative arts who feel they have something to say but feel they don’t have the skills, or lack confidence, opportunity, or encouragement. Tear up the grammatical rulebook, says Malik, and just “write what’s in your heart… don't think about making it good.” Emotional honesty is the most important element, believes Malik, because “we have a natural ability to connect with sincerity. If you feel something, or think something, and you feel like you want to get it out there on paper, then just get it out while you're feeling it, and get it out as true to the feeling as possible, don't be constrained by the rules of language, just get it out how you feel it, in whatever dialect, meter, format, make it make sense.”

Although Malik’s poetic odyssey began with a few thoughts, jotted down as they came to him, the next step was the real leap of faith: performance. He was coaxed into the arena by another North West poet, Lemn Sissay, who was performing with Jalal Nuriddin. He asked to hear one of Malik’s poems, told him it was good, and invited him to perform at the open mic event which followed the show:

“I remember standing up there with my head bowed, and all these people staring at me, and I was really self-conscious, introducing myself saying 'I'm Malik Al Nasir, I'm not a poet, I'm just an ordinary guy who happened to write some poetry', and then I launched into my poem, and I got a standing ovation, and that changed everything for me, that was the point at which I realised that I could actually do this.”

And how. Malik now recites his work in front of audiences of all sizes, and doesn’t miss a beat when invited to perform in places like Cambridge University, delivering his passionate verse and heartfelt opinions on weighty issues such as immigration and citizenship to students and academics.

As an artist unafraid to subvert tradition and convention and mould words and ideas in his own style, Malik is in good company. Artist Jean-Michel Basquiat, rapper MIA, artist and film-maker Steve McQueen, poet and writer Toni Morrison, musician Afrika Bambaataa, and, of course, Jalal Nuriddin and Gil Scott-Heron, are just a handful of creative artists who have achieved success on their own terms, and Malik believes there’s no end to what “ordinary guys” and women can achieve, as long as your ideas remain true to yourself:

“If it comes out like something no-one's ever heard before all the better, because you might be the next big thing.”

“The revolution WILL put you in the driver's seat”, claimed Gil Scott-Heron. Is this the moment you too take control of your own destiny?

As part of Black History Month, on Saturday 4 November at the Arts Centre A Tribute to Gil Scott-Heron: The Revolution Will Be Live! will feature Malik & the O.Gs, alongside Kim Jordan, in tribute to his mentor Gil Scott-Heron’s musical, literary and activist legacy.

Edge Hill’s next Open Mic Night is Monday 6 November, 7.30 pm: put yourself in the driver’s seat.

[stateofthehearts]

i need to write down my feelings

today my erasmus semester in sweden ended. i arrived back home safely and without any complications, but i can feel that my heart is missing.

it’s still with my international friends in sweden. my beloved g-up people. we share so many great memories together and i will cherish them forever. 

axel banaxel - the craziest and nicest swede i met. no one could make me laugh like you did. i never saw you in a bad mood and in germany i would call you an “überlebenskünstler”. you have a huge heart.

gabriele - though we never talked too much, without you it wouldn’t have been the same. i forgive you the mess in the kitchen and hope you will be happy with your girlfriend forever.

paula - uffffff, paula. you are so similar to me that sometimes i wondered if we’re twins. i love your craziness and your energy, but also your kisses. i love you

patricia from andalusia - such a sweet, kind girl. i never heard a bad word coming out of your mouth and you should always, always smile. it’s beautiful

ola - the crazy polish one. you showed me to just be myself whenever, wherever. dancing with you and randomly screaming because we felt like it, made even the worst days enjoyable. never change.

ginevra - by far the cutest girls i’ve ever met. i don’t think you have a single bad cell in your body, because you’re always so cheerful and helpful.  you pyjama pants are the shit! and thanks to you i adopted “oh mother” to my vocabularly. i will visit your for sure!

idoia - crazy spanish girl. your dancing and laugh i will never forget. you can get grumpy but even then you’re incredibly cute and lovable. when i’m in spain you have to teach me how to pareo. don’t fall for the arschlöcher and scheiß-kerle.

tania - oh my tania. you presence always calms me down. you’re such a down to earth person, always smiling, always helpful, always amazing. 

dennis - danny t aus bremen. 31 jahre jung und lebt noch wie ein anfang 20er. der fucking traum. du warst immer so nett, manchmal creepy aber nie too much. 

danni -  papa grande! i miss your calmness and your amazing oneliners. sometimes you would hit the punchlines so hard and on point, oh madre mia. you’re a great guy and you know it! ;)

petr - loud. funny. lovable. you made me laugh every day and even when i pretended to be annoyed, i secretely loved it. (though i wish you wouldn’t slam me into the wall or throw me onto the ground) your broken german (schamgegend, materialfehler, da liegt der hund begraben etc.) is amazing and i admire you for your talkative ways. you just speak to everyone all the time and that’s exactly what we needed. you were the glue of our erasmus that kept us all together. lots of love.

anna banana - die 3-tage wach österreicherin. als ich dich zuerst kennen gelernt habe, dachte ich du bist einfach nur eine graue maus von vielen. aber je näher man dich kennenlernt, desto mehr zeigt sich deine tolle art. du bist immer ehrlich und man kann dir jeden gedanken im gesicht ablesen. :D du bist unglaublich aufgeblüht und hattest sehr viel spaß, glaub ich. und ich habe dich gebrochen! du hast geraucht!!!!! und getrunken!!!! hahaha

laura - die 2te österreicherin im bunde. du bist ein so angenehmer mensch und dir hätte ich von sekunde 1 an all meine geheimnisse anvertraut, weil du nie vorurteile gegenüber anderen hattest. dank dir wurde auch mein wortschatz erweitert! hoppla zitz! liebe

sonja - meine beste freundin in dieser zeit. wir kannten uns schon vorher und in deutschland haben wir schon ne menge spaß aber dieser wurde in schweden noch potenziert. sich mit jemandem das zimmer zu teilen wäre mit keinem so gut gegangen wie mit dir. ich müsste lügen, wenn du mich nicht mal aufgeregt hättest, aber das ist völlig normal und ich bin mir sicher, ich war auch nicht immer leicht. trotzdem haben wir jeden tag mindestens einen lachanfall gehabt. haben unzählige witze gemacht und auch mal unfassbar viel scheiße geredet. mit dir ist ein stück erasmus wieder mit nachhause gekommen und ich freue mich unglaublich mit dir immer wieder in erinnerungen zu schwelgen. nur du weißt nämlich was wir zusammen erlebt haben. ich liebe dich

irina - saying goodbye to you was one of the hardest things. you have the biggest heart of any person i’ve ever met and i know you would give anyone everything you had if they needed it. i think with you i definitely found a friend for live. x

there are so many more people who made my erasmus-semester unforgettable. this is just my g-up family. the people who were there for me at all times.we had so much fun in our corridor and i will never ever forget it. spending the months with you was the best time of my life and i will keep it in my heart forever. and ever. 

lots of love 

xx