#everyone say thank you jane austen

[hycinthrt]

i love how a big part of elizabeth bennet’s character is that she is obviously very smart, she is very observant, but she can easily be led astray by her preconceived notions, by things that she already has convinced herself of believing. and this is most obvious by her not seeing mr. darcy’s proposal coming at all, because girl that man was openly flirting with her. i don’t think this is shown a lot in the movie or the tv series, but he keeps teasing her, answering her witty remarks with a smile, the whole “i am not afraid of you” thing. like, charlotte saw it coming, colonel fitzwilliam definitely saw it coming, the gardiners knew as soon as they saw them together later in the book, mr darcy was not as subtle as he thought he was being

seriously, god bless you jane austen for giving us this romance of two fucking idiots constantly misunderstanding each other’s actions and intentions. god bless you for giving us mr “aha so like what do you think of your friend’s marriage? you wouldn’t mind living away from your family when you marry right? oh, no reason, no reason, just a random thought. and what do you think of rosings, you know if hypothetically you were ever a guest there, no, no reason hehe”, and miss “i wonder why i keep coming across mr darcy during my walks, i even made sure to tell him that this is where i usually take my walks so he can avoid me but we are still??? running into each other???? and he keeps asking me all these strange questions too, what a weirdo”

just, two idiots that were made for each other

[firthbetterorfirthworse]

Another beautifully set up mirror shot

Gorgeous framing. Yes please.

And then we have poor Darcy, gathering all of his courage but not really allowing himself to hope

But soon they are haaaaaappy

Look at theeeeeemmmmmmmm

He wants her so bad. In an alternate timeline, we get an incredible scene where he expresses himself as sensibly and as warmly as a man violently in love can be supposed to do, if you know what I mean

Anyway I'm pretty sure I hid my feelings well and you can't tell, but I like this adaptation

[incognita-soul]

I've spent all afternoon thinking about the line from Wentworth's letter "you sink your voice, but I can distinguish the tones of that voice when they would be lost on others" and about how that really is the most important part of the letter. Yes "you pierce my soul" and "I have loved none but you" and "I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago" are all more swoon-worthy. But the whole point of Persuasion is how Anne suffers because none of her friends or family acknowledge her needs or anything she says. She is made small by everyone around her. She is persuadable because she has been stripped of her agency; not by the circumstances of her life, but because the people in her life have talked over and down to her so much that she has stopped resisting. She knows that she won't be heard, so she just stops speaking. But then Wentworth hears her voice! He hears her, sees her, and he loves her for who she is, not what he wants her to be. I think Jane Austen knew exactly what she was doing by including that line. It's so subtle in such a purposeful way.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk

[canon-in-too-deep]

50 Free Typesets

New achievement unlocked! I now have 50 public domain books/typesets available for FREE in my library! 🥳 Above is a collage of all 50 title pages.

What does this mean? It means that these classic books have been typeset (typographic, book design, layout work done), and are ready as pdfs that can be used to read, print out, book bind, or burn at your pleasure! (Just keep it to personal use only!)

The full list (with page sizes now noted) of all 50 books available can be found here on my tumblrary directory/masterlist (which will update as I add more), and below the break of this post!

Please please feel free to request access to my library (aka, yee good ol' googly drive). I usually respond within 24 hours, and they are indeed free! Just leave credit if you use, and consider liking/reblogging!

Also, if you find any errors in the files, let me know! I made these in Affinity, not with an AI program, and typos are natural spawns XD

From Frankenstein to Pride and Prejudice, to Sherlock Holmes to a dude that wakes up as a bug, I've been honored to be able to typeset these books and share them with all of you.

A part of me wants to ramble on about the behind the scenes and my continuing personal journey of amateur typesetting...but I think the most important thing I can say is simply thank you! to everyone that's stopped by! So thank you all! (And should I try for 100? 🤔 Hmmm...)

Warning! Wall of text below the break!

All 50 typesets available (some have alternate versions in library):

Persuasion by Jane Austen (Letter Folio)

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson (Letter Quarto)

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley (Letter Folio)

The Merry Adventures of Robinhood by Howard Pyle (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

Peter Pan by J. M. Barrie (Letter Folio)

Dracula by Bram Stoker (Letter Folio)

The Call of Cthulhu by H. P. Lovecraft (Letter Quarto)

The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde (Letter Folio)

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

The Invisible Man by H. G. Wells (Letter Folio)

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (Letter Folio)

The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare (Letter Folio)

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde (Letter Folio)

The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

The Odyssey by Homer (Letter Folio)

Tales of Space and Time by H. G. Wells (Letter Folio)

The House of Mirth by Edith Wharton (Letter Folio)

A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

The Book of Dragons by E. Nesbit (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

Much Ado About Nothing by William Shakespeare (Letter Folio)

Twenty Thousand Leagues under the Sea by Jules Verne (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky (Letter Folio)

Around the World in Eighty Days by Jules Verne (Letter Folio)

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

Leave it to Psmith by P. G. Wodehouse (Letter Folio)

Lord Peter views the body by Dorothy L. Sayers (Letter Folio)

The Room in the Tower by E. F. Benson (Letter Folio)

Right Ho, Jeeves by P. G. Wodehouse (Letter Folio)

The Time Machine by H. G. Wells (Letter Folio)

Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka (Letter Quarto)

Poirot Investigates by Agatha Christie (Letter Folio)

Grimms' Fairy Tales by Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm (Letter Folio)

The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux (Letter Folio)

Andersen's Fairy Tales by Hans Christian Andersen (Letter Folio)

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving (Letter Quarto)

Shakespeare's Sonnets by William Shakespeare (Letter Folio)

The Raven by Edgar Allan Poe (Illustrated) (Letter Octavo)

Anne of Green Gables by L. M. Montgomery (Letter Folio)

A Journey to the Centre of the Earth by Jules Verne (Letter Folio)

Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen (Letter Folio)

Notre-Dame de Paris by Victor Hugo (Letter Folio)

Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë (Letter Folio)

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum (Letter Folio)

The Blue Fairy Book (Font Sampler Edition) edited by Andrew Lang (Letter Folio)

A Princess of Mars by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Letter Folio)

Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott (Illustrated) (Letter Folio)

The Mysterious Affair at Styles by Agatha Christie (Letter Folio)

Emma by Jane Austen (Letter Folio)

Paradise Lost by John Milton (Letter Folio)

[atrologynuances]

Astrology observations pt2 || Planets in their detriment

NOTE: the interpretation of these are solely on the planets. harmonious/inharmonious aspects can change the translation of these planets.

these are based on personal observations as well as acquired knowledge from books, websites, and other observation posts.

𓋼𓍊 Aries/Scorpio Venus- may struggle maintaining a harmonious relationship which can lead to them changing their relationships quite often. aries venuses might posses an either fiery or more grounded energy thanks to the cardinal energy. scorpios on the other hand might be emotionally reserved, and only truly love very few people around them if any, the rest they keep around depending on what they can access from them (very manipulative). Given their possible relationship insecurities these two venus signs will seek for someone going at the same pace and someone with the same mindset, which realistically is hard to find. when they do think they’ve found it, they might later find out they were in fact wrong. When they do get in a relationship they might become possessive as a result of possible insecurities.

𓋼𓍊 Taurus/Libra Mars- these natives might need extreme motivation to get things going, like a 9-5 they don’t like, but the security and responsibility of it keeps them on their toes. these mars signs could also lack sense of security in their actions, which could leave them wondering whether they were right or wrong and as a result they might not fight for themselves as hard as they should. it is important for them to have a big support system that reassures and validates their actions when conflicts arise.

𓋼𓍊 Gemini/Virgo Jupiter- these natives have a hard time seeing beyond logic explanation, they could experience something and until they don’t find logic behind it they won’t be satisfied. get fixated on many things but never seems to finish or find a final answer to any of them. is not that they’re unable to finish them, they’re just no longer interested to. closed minded towards otherworldly subjects, or tries very hard to understand it.

𓋼𓍊 Cancer/Leo Saturn- these natives lack discipline but want it. they might vent to you that they do not like their current monetary situation and are looking to make some changes in that aspect of their life, but the next day you see them spending all their money on clothes. they know this is wrong but will still do it. they may be prone to control people and situations because they think they know what’s best for everyone. however, they do not like people telling them what to do lol. they might be prone to burnouts easily and immune system problems.

𓋼𓍊 Sagittarius/Pisces Mercury- struggles to find something that feels “right” for them, when they do find it they mostly have to work harder than everybody else to catch up. problems with communication; either started talking late or have problems expressing themselves as they get older. prone to saying things that don’t make sense upfront which will make them have to explain themselves often. this might create insecurities that will lead them to express themselves less. this is the reason why I think so many great writers have these placements, they can just erase and reword their writing without being judged for it.

- fyodor dostoevsky, jane austen, james joyce, victor hugo, emily dickinson

𓋼𓍊 Capricorn Moon- find it difficult to be vulnerable, this translates to needing or wanting material security to make sure they won’t need anyone. do not like to rely on anyone for emotional/financial support even if they really need it. despite all this, they are very emotional. the difference between them and their sister sign cancer is that they are not expressive with their emotions or act on them. something I have noticed is that they are not as workaholics as people might expect them to be, however when they work, they splurge on the money they make or might be stingy with it, as either one of these actions brings security to them. most of the times they don’t feel loved by either one of their parents even if they��ve both always been present in their lives.

𓋼𓍊 Aquarius Sun- natives are hard to describe for me because I have not met many of them, I feel like most hideaway at home lol. one thing i’ve noticed is that they cry a lot and are unapologetic about it. these people shine bright like their sister sign leo, the difference is they don’t want to so they avoid situations where they have to or when they are put in these situations they have to make sure their presentation is flawless. however in day to day life they do not really care how they’re perceived. they’re the ones that go to school in pijama pants. they also oftentimes seek some form of validation with other people, which is why they change partners often. very physically beautiful, but doesn’t seem to know or act on it.

Thank you so much for reading, I hope y’all have a wonderful day.

guide

[armageddidnt]

Welcome to My Collection of Random Thoughts during my nth* rewatch of Good Omens Season 2

*only amazon prime knows the exact number at this point but I’m fairly certain it’s in the double digits

Episode 1: Gabriel’s fly lurking in the box when Aziraphale first takes it inside 👀

Crowley’s promise of “two minutes” basically means that he’s been homeless and living in his car for the past 4 years strictly so that he can be within 2 driving minutes of Aziraphale at all times in case his angel needs him I’m not crying you are

So here I think the key word is “fragile,” Crowley knows they are ostensibly safe from their respective sides but that could change at any moment so he’s basically spent the last 4 years in anxiety-ridden terror hovering as close to Aziraphale as he can to try and protect him from heaven, hell, and anyone else that would want to bring him harm after all that business they pulled in season 1 with stopping Armageddon

Episode 2: I just happened to pause the episode while Aziraphale is lying to the angels about his miracle and LOL Michael really outdid himself here (Sheen, not the Archangel)

Gabriel trying to swat flies and almost smashing the repository of every single one of his memories

I’m cAckling

So if Good Omens exists in Good Omens, does that mean Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett exist in Good Omens?? Do you think they based their Aziraphale and Crowley characters on Aziraphale and Crowley??

Episode 3: So I’m trying to find any hints or foreshadowing of the Gabriel Beelzebub thing bc tbh I did kind of feel like it came out of nowhere which is really the only issue I have with them. I found this one scene where Beelzebub almost ?? seems to be concerned about Gabriel ?? But it’s blink and you miss it and there could be lots of other reasons why Beelzebub doesn’t want to fail in locating Gabriel (pressure from/leverage over heaven, etc) so idk

More Foreshadowing Fly content 🪰

Episode 4: So here we’ve seen that Shax can just appear inside the Bentley bc she did it earlier to talk to Crowley. Shax only pretended to be a hitchhiker so she could be invited in because Azirpahale was driving so technically she needed permission to cross the threshold of an angel 👀

This scene will never not destroy me the 1941 flashback is the absolute sOFTEST thing ever to happen on this show

We really need more context here I need to see the Crowley-Furfur Monkey Rides

Episode 5: ahahaha thank you google translate for absolutely destroying my sanity this evening

POP goes the Ziraphale

Okay I know you can’t hear it in the gif but just before Nina takes Maggie’s hand, there’s a very quiet miracle noise, like Azirpahale literally MADE Nina dance with Maggie, he said I’m writing a Mina Jane-Austen-Ball-AU and my otp will KISS godDAMMIT

Azirpahale seems lowkey kind of manic this whole scene tho, he’s controlling literally everyone to force Nina and Maggie together and whenever Crowley says anything that pokes holes in Aziraphale’s Magical Jane Austen Ball Fairytale, Aziraphale just straight up denies it. He wants Nina and Maggie to dance and he wants him and Crowley to dance and he refuses to acknowledge anything beyond that.

Is this just Shax insulting Crowley for how much of a nuisance he’s been or a reference to his former status as an angel ???

They’re both completely dismissive of each other when they’re trying to say something important and that’s the main issue they’ve been having this entire season tbh

Episode 6: I think it’s funny that Crowley describes the angels as bees here because in the book, Neil/Terry describe humans the same way. Guess we have more in common than we thought huh?

So the metatron was the one who originally decided Gabriel would be memory wiped and not sent to hell, and he was also the one that decided not to sound an alarm about Gabriel for some reason and said ‘just go find him yourself’ instead. The metatron has definitely got his own agenda and you can bet he doesn’t want Aziraphale up there in heaven because he’s a “leader” and he’s “honest” like that’s exactly what Gabriel was and look where it got him 👀

There’s just something I can’t quite put my finger on about the metatron bringing Aziraphale a coffee from “give me coffee or give me death” and then asking Aziraphale if he’s going to take the coffee he’s giving him…

I have not seen a single person talk about this since s2 came out but Nina literally calls Maggie “angel” because that’s the term of endearment they hear Crowley using for Aziraphale !!!! I’m still going fERAL over this and I can’t believe no one else is eitHER

Something about this part of The Final Fifteen compared to this scene from the first episode is so representative of the entire season. Azirpahale keeps saying “my way or get out” and Crowley finally hits a wall and can follow Aziraphale no further. So he does just that. He goes.

I’m sure a lot of us by now have seen this post that brings up how Aziraphale literally pushes the remains of Crowley into his mouth and swallows and it’s the only thing I see when I watch this now

We still don’t know for certain if Crowley queued up this song to play on their way to the Ritz or if the Bentley started playing it all on its own and it’s driving me insane

Basically how I am doing after my Truly-Alarming-Number-th watch of this traumatizing episode/season. WELP hope you enjoyed this garbage dump of my thoughts and feelings time to go cry for a bit again BYE

[magewritesstories]

​🇾​​🇴​​🇺​​🇷​ ​🇮​​🇳​​🇸​​🇹​​🇦​​🇬​​🇷​​🇦​​🇲​ ​🇮​​🇫​ ​🇾​​🇴​​🇺​ ​🇼​​🇪​​🇷​​🇪​ ​🇮​​🇳​ ​🇬​​🇮​​🇱​​🇲​​🇴​​🇷​​🇪​ ​🇬​​🇮​​🇷​​🇱​​🇸​

Liked by paris.geller and 147 others

im.not.yn. @paris.geller is my new favourite study buddy (sorry @rory.gilmore.official)

View all comments

→ rory.gilmore.official never took you for the fredo corleone type      → im.not.yn. sorry babes, but you talk too much sometimes

→ paris.geller. thank you, you’re my favourite too     → jessnotfound she said favourite studdy buddy, im her favourite person

Liked by whoislorelai and 97 others

im.not.yn one party with @pretty.girl.madeline and @dumbblondelouise is enough to last me a year

View all comments

→ LukeDanes is this why you were wearing sunglasses inside yesterday?      → im.not.yn mayyybbee....

→ whoislorelai aah reminds me of the good old days      → jessnotfound you mean the mesozoic era?      → rory.gilmore.official you might wanna run away again @jessnotfound, my mom’s looking for you      → xo.lane everyone let’s collectively pray for @jessnotfound

Liked by jessnotfound and 137 others

im.not.yn my three favourite things rainy days, jane austen and coffee

View all comments

→ jessnotfound but hemingway is so much better     → paris.geller hemingway has nothing on jane     → rory.gilmore.official you did not just say that     → whoislorelai i have no idea who’s correct but i enjoy watching jess get attacked so... jane > hemingway

→ LukeDanes how did you not spill that coffee?      → im.not.yn its a secret i’ll never tell

Liked by LukeDanes and 204 others

im.not.yn taking pictures of jess when he’s not looking is my favourite way to pass time

View all comments

→ xo.lane must be nice having a boyfriend....      → im.not.yn hehe it is

→ rory.gilmore.official i ship it     → whoislorelai im your co-captain @LukeDanes can build the ship     → LukeDanes what???

→ dumbblondelouise you two are cute, couldnt be me tho      → pretty.girl.madeline sameee

Liked by paris.geller and 162 others

im.not.yn midterms at chilton suck

View all comments

→ paris.geller they’re not that bad, you just have to plan correctly      → im.not.yn they suck when you have zero motivation (like moi)

→ whoislorelai they also suck for parents, rory hasnt slept all week and she wont let me sleep either, you have to sleep its what keeps you pretty      → rory.gilmore.official who cares if im pretty if i fail my finals???      → xo.lane do you really wanna know the answer to that question @rory.gilmore.official?

Liked by jessnotfound and 196 others

im.not.yn its my fav time of the year again

View all comments

→ LukeDanes everything’s snowed in though???      → jessnotfound perfect excuse to not socialize

→ xo.lane i hate it i have to dress like joey in that one episode of friends      → im.not.yn oooohhh i remember that one

→ paris.geller i hope you arent taking the holidays as an excuse to slack off      → im.not.yn who me? slack off? never.

[sunflowersteves]

when you're gone || j.m.

pairing || joel miller x f!reader

summary || Jackson, Wyoming was supposed to be a calm and quiet town. Joel wasn't so sure when he wakes up alone after another unbearable nightmare.

author's note || without @themarcusmoreno, this fic would not have been made so I thank ash a thousand times for enabling me into writing soft joel comfort with some filth!! and tbh, i think i have an addition to soft!joel so i hope you all enjoy (especially after that episode). also yes, i may have gotten the title from the cranberries song!!

warnings || nightmares, ptsd, apocalypse ptsd, pure disgusting fluff, hurt/comfort, joel needs a break so i'm giving him one, soft!joel, SMUT, oral sex, blowjob, praise kink, [18+ only!!]

masterlist

In Wyoming, it was a quiet and peaceful night. The crickets chirped, and the cold icy wind blew against the logged cabins. Everyone in Jackson was under the cloudy haze of a tranquil slumber, and so were the trees as they gently swayed underneath the stars. 

In a quaint cabin, Joel was mumbling in his sleep. A dark shadow cast over him from the troubles of his active mind. His eyebrows furrowed in despair, and his cheeks were hot from the pain that shot through his chest. He could picture her. He could picture you. He could picture Ellie. A sharp cry and scream thwarted against his eardrums, and he panicked. 

His eyes snapped open in an instant, and his chest heaved at the alarm that spread across his chest and down to the pits of his stomach. He looked around the room—his eyes frantic. An old chair, a bookshelf, and a pile of clothes. 

A nightmare. Just a nightmare. 

He turned to look over at the silhouette of your form under the covers, but his heart froze once more as you weren’t even there. 

You were gone. 

It struck deep inside him—empty and sullen—as the questions started to roll over one another. Where are you? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Are you alive?

He didn’t waste any time by putting some pants over his boxers or taking his flannel. He just needed to run. The strong pads of his feet hit the floorboards, and he sauntered down the stairs. He had to find you. 

He needed to find you. 

The pure, hard feeling of desperation rose in his throat. His hands were shaking by his sides as he whipped around the archway that leads into the living room. His eyes scanned every crevice of the room—starting from the tall bookshelves and guitar stand that sat in the back corner. Then, he saw it. He saw the movement of a hand flipping over a page in a book. 

You.

He let out a big puff of air, the relief washing him over like a cold splash of water to his face. You were safe. You were okay. He could feel the panic rush out of his chest, and pure adoration sunk in between his heart and his lungs. Just you.

He watched, quietly, at the soft rise and fall of your chest. The hand that wasn’t holding the book in your lap was tapping gently on the edge of the sofa.

A lukewarm cup of tea, the one you most likely forgot from the riveting pages, sat on the coffee table in front of you. Your eyes rapidly scanned each individual page, and your lips pursed into a small smile. 

He could tell you were reading a Jane Austen novel. You always had the same expression when you were reading Pride & Prejudice, Emma, or Persuasion. Your left brow would always twitch when you got to a familiar scene that you had read a million times before. 

He suddenly could feel the warm breath of a calm mind take over his body. He felt like he could relax now. You’re here. You’re safe. You’re alive. 

As if you feel his soft stare, your eyes turn to his—your smile even larger than before. “Aren’t you supposed to be in bed, handsome?”

He doesn’t say anything. His mouth doesn’t even form a smile. He wasn’t sure he could. While his body relished in the feeling of relief, the whiplash of feelings that swirled around in his head was starting to get to him. 

“Joel?”

Your eyes turned cloudy with concern, and now his heart sank just a little. He didn’t want to make you feel worried. The last thing he wanted to do was open a deep wound in your chest like the one that settled in his. 

He quietly sat down next to you, arms pulling in your shoulders, so your back lay rested against his chest. You sat the book down on the coffee table right before making home into his arms.

He breathed in deep, familiar senses of your own musk and the spices you had been picking earlier that day. Rosemary, bay leaves, and parsley were your favorite plants in the garden that Ellie had asked you to build. 

You sat there for just a moment, knowing that he needed to take his time. Joel was never a man of words. He was silent and calculating, watching everyone and anything around him.

You were one of his soft spots over the years—you and Ellie—but his hardened heart still prevented him from allowing his deepest affections to shine through. So, when his thoughts came barrelling down on top of him, he needed the time to articulate them. You would always patiently wait for him, each and every time. 

“Had another nightmare.” He paused, noticing the small intake of your breath. He could tell that you felt bad for waking up in the middle of the night and not being there for him. “Woke up alone.” 

He chose his words carefully. He didn’t want to say, “woke up, and you weren’t there.” In truth, you weren’t, but he knew you had insomnia. He knew that he wasn’t the only one suffering under this roof from the dangerous, violent, and pure aching pain that the world had caused. 

“Joel—Baby—” God, you were too good for him. You were a badass throughout all of the years of fighting and violence, yet your heart shined brighter than ever, just for him and Ellie. 

He whispered just under his breath, “I had the same nightmare. I know you’re there. I know Ellie’s there. I know Sarah’s there—” He shakes his head. “—But I can never find you. Any of you.”

He can picture the frown that forms on your pretty, plump lips. It wasn’t your fault. You know that. You couldn’t have known, but the burning guilt in your chest wants to say otherwise. Your hand grabs onto his own, which is splayed across your abdomen, and you squeeze—making sure that he knew you were here. 

“I’ll never go anywhere, Joel. Not without you.”

A deep, crackling affection sprouted in his chest at your affirmation. He could almost smile—bright and pearly white. His worn heart thumped loudly against his chest, surely pumping loudly against your shoulder blade. 

“I know, darlin’. My brain is just funny sometimes.” His lips crack just a little at the snort he was able to pull from your nose. 

“Hell of a way to put it, Miller.”

After a couple of beats of silence, you bite your lip—contemplating whether you should act on what your brain was currently concocting. You knew that Joel wouldn’t be able to sleep for the rest of the night, and by default, you wouldn’t, either.

You could tell he was still lost in the faraway lands of his mind. His eyes were glossy and dazed. You knew he was, in no doubt, trying to unsee the darkest parts of his nightmares.

You decide to say fuck it, and you attempt to untangle Joel’s arms from yours. You hear a disapproving grunt from the man behind you, followed by another confused sound when you started to leave the couch.

“Darlin’, where are you—” His question dies on his tongue, though, all while you sink down onto your knees. His eyes are blown wide—dark pupils dilating under the soft glow of the eucalyptus candle you started to burn earlier. 

You give your best innocent smile. By the way his lips open just a smidge, you knew your idea was a good one. “Wanna take care of you, Joel.”

You bite your lip, sinking your teeth into the plump skin, and he curses under his breath. “Will you let me take care of you, handsome?” Your palms flatten across his splayed-out thighs, and you rub back and forth. He could feel his boxers become tighter as you wait for his answer. “Hmm?”

His body involuntarily leans back so he could sink further and further into the couch. His body acts, once again, before his mind can even comprehend the pure lust and desire he has for you. His hips jump forward to allow your soft hands to shuffle his boxers down and pool around his legs. 

Finally, he says, “please.”

You didn’t need to be told twice.

You grab a hold of his half-hard member, and he groans at the sight of you practically drooling for his cock. Your eyes are glistening with such lust, and he sees that speckled look of love that fills them.

His own eyes are dark and heavy-lidded as you press a couple of sweet kisses on his inner thigh—causing him to jerk. You pump his cock a few times, jaw slacking at the pre-cum that is already dribbling against his tip.

“Darlin’.” He gasps.

He watches as you wrap your soft lips around his head. He can feel his cock twitch and become harder—pleasure throbbing against his bulging veins. “F-Fuck, just like that. Yes.”

You flatten your tongue along his ruddy tip and then swirl in between his crying slit. “Fuckin’ mouth on you, I—” He lets out small puffs of air, teeth biting his lower lip in pleasurable agony. If it weren't for his fat cock in your mouth, you definitely would have smiled at the praise. He moans, almost as if he could feel it. 

"Joel—baby—so needy."

Joel was pretty sure he could die happy, right with your lips on his cock because when you rasp that out, there was a bead of your saliva and his pre-cum connected to your lips.

His knees twitch in between you, not being able to help it. He drags his hand to the nape of your neck and squeezes the base of it. “Takin’ care of me so fuckin’ well. My pretty girl—suckin’ my cock.” His words slur together with each syllable of his honeyed Texas accent.

The soft cries and whimpers that leave his mouth are really addicting—your hand squeezes against the base of his thigh from wanting more. 

"You taste so good, Joel. 'm—I love you. I love your cock."

You bop your head even lower—esophagus spasming at the pure thickness of Joel. No matter how many times your sweet cunt or stretched mouth took him, you were never used to his swollen size. 

You hum against him as you feel the sticky substance of pre-cum leak from his tip and onto your tongue—salty and earthy. His hips sputter slightly upward, lips cursing up a storm. “Oh-fuck-fuck. C-Can’t–ugh–can’t take much longer, sweet girl.” 

His body almost shutters from the drool he feels slowly drip down to his balls. Your mouth is warm and balmy, slick tongue working excellently against his hardened shaft. He gasps out your name, mixed in with one of his pet names for you. 

He lets himself become lost between the soft pillows of you and your expert tongue that brings him to the brink of pleasure. He lets the stiff trauma that makes his shoulders and muscle tense slowly wash off of him. “Love when you suck my cock, yeah, f-fuck—my pretty girl takin’ care of my fuckin’ cock.”

His mouth hangs open as you hollow your cheeks and suck on his ruddy tip before shoving your throat back down to the base of his cock. He wasn’t sure how he was sane at this moment—watching the saliva drop from his cock down to his balls—as he was throbbing with pleasure. 

His head drops back onto the couch, and he moans and whimpers out your name. It stays on his tongue—repeating over and over as if it was the only thing that ever mattered in the world. He feels his tummy squeeze, thighs tensing and pulsating as he feels that familiar coil tighten. “Oh, baby—darlin’—my girl—”

You suck in, swirling your tongue just over his slit once more, and he gruffs out a gasp. "Fuck, I love you, I love you, I love you—" Thick beads of cum spew to the back of your throat—causing you to gag. His cum rolls over as his cock twitches and spurts in your mouth. 

You swallow every drop that Joel gives you—gulping it down on his shaft. He was already sensitive, cock already softening, but the whimper that left his mouth seemed one of ecstasy.

You relent, though. Your jaw was a little sore, and you had a feeling Joel was going to want to return the favor. You unhinge your mouth from him with a small ‘pop’ and pat his knee in affection. 

“Feel better, handsome?”

“Loads.” He snorts. “Literally.”

You roll your eyes, getting up from the floor and taking your usual seat on his thighs. “Hilarious, Miller. Real funny.” You were happy, though. You were able to give him the distraction he deserves.

His smile never settles as he pulls you into him. A weight had lifted onto his chest at the true realization that you’re here.

You’re with him.

You’ve alive.

You’re here. 

Joel knew that the nightmare would haunt him for a long time, but for now, you are all he needs.

[jotun-philosopher]

Discworld/Good Omens parallels ramble

Exactly what it says on the tin! These are some fun little Discworld/Good Omens parallels that my brain picked up on at various times (usually 3 a.m. or thereabouts... Thanks, mum, for the persistent insomnia...)

Mild-to-moderate spoilers for Wyrd Sisters, Lords And Ladies, Men At Arms and Carpe Jugulum below the cut.

In A Life With Footnotes, the official biography of Terry Pratchett, Rob Wilkins mentions that when he was in school, a young Pterry wrote for English class a story (sadly lost to the mists of time) about orcs attacking a vicarage in full Jane-Austen-spoof fashion. Now, given how the Whickber Street Shopkeepers' Ball turned out, it seems reasonable to assume one of two things: a) this story was not a factor under consideration when writing S2 and the parallel is an ineffably delightful coincidence (a bit unlikely) b) this story *was* an inspiring factor in the writing of S2, and the nod to Pterry happened to work really well with the plot (seems a bit more likely). Either way, the parallel is there and giving me all of the warm fuzzies <3

There's an idea in Discworld, forming a significant part of the moral backbone of the series, that's very succinctly summed up by Granny Weatherwax in Carpe Jugulum: "[S]in [...] is when you treat people like things. Including yourself." This is absolutely at the core of what's wrong with Heaven and Hell and God and Satan in Good Omens; the leadership and culture of both organisations/cults treat everyone -- angels, demons and humans alike -- as disposable things to be used and toyed with and discarded or destroyed if they start having the temerity to be imperfect or form opinions or thoughts of their own.

There're two characters in Discworld who parallel Aziraphale surprisingly strongly: Magrat Garlick (of the Lancre witches) and Captain Carrot Ironfoundersson of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch. -*Magrat is viewed as a bit of a soft, soppy 'wet hen' by the other witches, but she is still a witch, with all that that implies. She also has at least one scene in every book in which she appears where she does something extremely badass and witchy; for example, turning an ancient wooden door back into a tree, or (very pertinently to GO) delivering a literally iron-clad punch to the face of a villain who's mentally torturing her with her own insecurities. Likewise, Aziraphale seems to mostly be viewed as a bit dull and wimpy by the other angels we see (though Magrat still has the genuine respect of her witchy peers) but he is still an angel -- a Principality -- with all the powers, steadfast guardianship and bloody-minded stubbornness of that rank. The Metatrash might not be vulnerable to iron in the same way as Discworld elves, but you can bet that his attempt to break Aziraphale and bring him into line is going to backfire just as spectacularly! *For the parallel between Aziraphale and Captain (well, Corporal, at this point in the Discworld timeline) Carrot, the novel I have in mind is Men At Arms. At one point, Vimes is being held at crossbow-point by a villain, and has a bout of internal monologuing about how, if someone has you at their mercy, you'd better hope they're evil, because that way they'll take time to gloat and mock you so you'll have an opportunity to think of a way out; a good man will kill you with barely a word. Carrot does exactly that at the climax of the plot, putting his sword through the villain and the stone pillar behind said villain without saying a thing. Now, Aziraphale might not quite have Carrot's 'incorruptible pure pureness' tendencies, but he is -- for all his flaws -- a good person. If he knows that something needs to be done to prevent an evil outcome, he will DO it without hesitation. He knows how to use a sword, too, and if That Frickin' Elevator Smile Of Tranquil Fury is any indication, the Metatrash is in far deeper doodoo than he realises! Related to the above, The Smile also reminds me of the old adage, "beware the fury of a patient man." (Well, man-shaped being in this case...) Very appropriate for our careful, thoughtful angel -- it would not surprise me (much) if Metatron were to depart the plot of S3 with a flaming sword pinning him to one of Heaven's columns (probably won't happen, but I can dream, eh?)

Hope you enjoyed reading all that :D

[abbysdruidess]

˜”°•.˜”°• headcanons about you and abby's wedding - modern au •°”˜.•°”˜

wc: 1.1k

warnings: wedding w modern au(obvs), crying, tooth rotting fluff, allusions to sex, no use of y/n

a/n: lmk what you guys think of this one and whether you'd like more of reader and Abby in this universe! don't hesitate to send any requests<33

this is sort of on theme with a previous fic where abby proposes to you, this one can be read as a standalone though:))

❦ after the proposal, you guys hurrying too much to get the wedding off the road and on the rails- you're still extremely proud and giddy to call each other your fianceé, and you've sent about 100 pictures of your wedding ring to everyone.

❦ it isn't until one night where you're having dinner over at jerry's that he brings up the wedding preparations and you're like oh shit, you two kinda need to haul ass and start sending invites.

❦ you decided on a small affair, only your immediate families and close friends over. I imagine that in the insistence of your future brother in law Lev you sent out RSVP invitations that were ocean themed with cute little sharkies on the front that say in a vast ocean of people we found each other(💀). A lot of people found them pretty funny though, and Lev was pretty excited about them.

❦ on par with the beach theme of your engagement, you decided to have the wedding on a beautiful beach resort in the beginning of June-not too hot, not too cold;)-with the ceremony and the reception on the shore.

❦ of course, you couldn't leave out the bachelorette party! You and Abby travel to Vegas with your respective friend groups for a weekend of clubbing and partying in general. And lets be fr, someone from either of two groups ends up getting lost and you have to recover him Hangover style. Thank God you didn't arrange for it the day before the wedding.

❦ the days before the upcoming event are mostly a blur, both of you making last minute arrangements about the food, the flowers, the music. Your gown with the final adjustments is delivered and you have to hide it in a fridge box in the basement so Abby won't take a peek.

❦ "But baaabe, I just wanna see what it looks like! You know this stuff about bad luck isn't actually legit." "I know, but it will be more exciting to see the final look at the wedding. I promise you."

❦ finally the big day is here! And let me just say, as a very emotionally constipated person, you'd probably be a little teary eyed all day long. When you put on your gown and look at yourself in the mirror and realise that holy shit, I'm about to marry the love of my life, my Abigail, she wants to spend the rest of her life with me. And this just hits you all at once and a few tears run down your chin.

❦ if you have any wedding traditions from your culture that you'd like to honour, Abby would be 100% down for it. It makes her feel closer to you, and part of the new family she's going to be in. She also really likes listening to its origins and what it's supposed to represent. In my country, we do this thing where the wedding squad writes all their names down in the couples' shoes and by the end of the night whoever's name is the most smudged is the one who's going to get married first. Let's be real, if they did this, it'd probably Manny whose name had almost disappeared and he'd freak the fuck out.

❦ once you're ready to walk down the aisle, and you glance at Abby you let out a small ᵍᵃˢᵖ at the sight, with Abby dressed to the nines and a glowing expression on her beautiful face. Her mouth also formed a little O at the sight of you, ready to become her wife, looking so so happy and a slightly teary eyed.

❦ during the actual ceremony, you two keep stealing glances at each other, smiling kinda goofily like :]. You two are goobers fr.

❦ for the vows, I think the game establishes that Abby is a big bookworm, so she chooses something perhaps from Emily Bronte or Jane Austen. Of course this isn't the entirety of what she wrote, she just finds it more accurate to express her love for you through someone's else perfectly adept words.

❦ once the reception kicks in, you're carefully wiping tears from your eyes so you don't smudge your makeup, and take some photos with the wedding party on the beach. You're accepting everyone's congratulations for your newlywed status, and settling down to prepare for your first dance.

❦ you had decided on dancing to Por Una Gabeza, and had actually rehearsed the slow tango a couple times so your movements are synchronised. By the end of the dance, you're in each other's arms, cheek to cheek simply enjoying the moment.

❦ by the time you've finished you meal, the party is in full swing, and you join in for a few dances until you decide on a cake break and allow Yara to be Abby's dancing partner. By the way, your wedding cake? Exquisite, chocolate ice cream with strawberry.

❦ I also imagine you guys doing the whole tossing the bouquet thing and -surprise surprise!-it ends up on Manny's lap on accident. He almost leaves.

❦ by the night, you're both clinging to each other, ready to resume your lives as Mrs and Mrs, and also ready to break into the bridal bed. Seriously, you can feel Abby's fingers feeling up your thigh and she's been whispering the things she wants to do to you all night. By 2 in the morning you're home, very much exhausted by the preparations and the emotional high, but also very ready to let Abby peak what's under your bridal gown.

❦ for wedding gifts to each other? She hands you two tickets for some exotic island you guys always talked about going, and make it your honeymoon. You get her an antique vinyl record player, because she had always been going about getting something to listen music to while cooking. Needless to say you both love each other's gifts:D

❦ a week or so after the ceremony you receive the photographs, and Abby makes it her duty to hand them on every corner of the house. Seriously, at some point, you could see a photo of you two in your field of vision pretty much about everywhere.

❦ her favourite one remains in her desk, one where you two are about to leave, sweaty and drunk, the camera capturing your musky faces as you sit on her lap clinging for dear life. It's so sweet and endearing, and it reminds her why she married you in the first place.

[smittywing]

Psst saw your bid for prompts 👀 perhaps something dealing with the aftermath of a bad injury? Or in another direction - the start of a epic prank war that will only end in tears (and maybe making out) who said that

Jaytim, or any pairing, or no pairing! Up to you! 🥰

Oooh, before we found fandom on the internet, my sister and I used to write fic with each other. One of our favorite things to do was put someone in a coma so their love interest could sit next to them and confess their feelings. I'm not saying I've gotten over this, but let's see if I can mix it up a bit.

Tim heard voices and felt pain - more pain than he'd ever experienced before. Not dead! he thought, thoroughly surprised, and passed right back out without opening his eyes.

He lost track of the number of times he came back to semi-consciousness and gave up. It was more than twice. Possibly a lot more than twice.

Eventually, he only heard one voice and the pain, which was still very present, was fuzzy around the edges and he dared to open his eyes.

Jason sat in a chair next to the bed, elbows braced on his knees as he read aloud from a paperback.

"Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant. You along have brought me to Bath. For you alone, I think and plan. Have you not seen this? Can you fail to have understood my wishes?"

Tim tried to say Jason's name but it came out more as a cough. Jason looked up immediately and closed the book.

"Look who finally decided to join the party," he said but the tone lacked his usual bluster and came out almost...soft. "How do you feel?" He offered Tim a plastic tumbler filled with cool water. Tim sipped from the straw and then did it again because it felt good.

"Are you reading Pride and Prejudice at my sickbed?" he croaked because he would bet money he'd seen Jane Austen's name on the cover.

"Persuasion," Jason said. "Everyone's read Pride and Prejudice. More people need to read Persuasion."

"Mm." Tim nodded because sure, that made it less weird. "How - long have I been out?"

Jason glanced at the watch on his wrist. "Almost three days," he said. "We were - uh. I mean. I. I was worried about you."

"Oh," Tim said, a wash of fatigue pulling at him. "That's... weirdly nice. Really nice," he corrected, realizing he was being rude. "Thank you?"

"You're...welcome?"

Jason stared at Tim, his eyes green-blue and wide.

Tim was missing something. He was gonna get it. He was. Just maybe not this go round. He tilted his head back against the pillow and yeah, he was going to go back to sleep. He'd figure out why Jason was acting weird later.

[calummss]

I’ll Call You Mine | Nell Jackson

masterlist

summary: finding a suitor was hard when everyone in london wanted your sister and not you; at least until nell jackson arrived

pairing: lesbian! nell jackson x lesbian bridgerton! reader

words: 1.6k

a/n: basically a nell jackson bridgerton au hehe

Life as a Bridgerton was not always as easy as the people of the ton thought. Yes, you were a respected family and influential but it came with a price. You loved your sister dearly but having to compete with her when you knew she would always be ahead of you was not a comfortable situation to be in. People looked at Daphne first. Greeted her first. And now that Lady Whistledown declared her the diamond of the first water it had you feeling down. Daphne was beautiful and gentle and deserved nothing more than to be called the diamond of the season. But it was only further proof of her excellence, something you were not in possession of.

Callers came early in the morning and left early in the afternoon. All for Daphne, not a single one for you.

The next day it was the same, only quieter. A few callers came for Daphne, gifting her flowers and jewels. You sat on the sofa reading Jane Austen’s new novel when the staff announced there was another caller.

“Miss Jackson is here for Y/n.” He announced and seconds after a brown haired lady entered the room with the most unusual style of clothes. She wore a billowy white shirt, dark trousers and a matching waistcoat and jacket. A woman in men’s clothing. Yet she looked marvellous.

“Miss Jackson,” your mother stepped towards her with a concealed confused expression. “It is calling hour.”

“I am aware, Lady Bridgerton.” She said, “I’m here to call on Miss Y/n Bridgerton.”

She turned her head to meet your figure hiding in the far back of the room. You smiled at her as you took her in. She was beautiful. The type of beauty you would see beyond your day, wondering whether or not you would see them again. She had light brown hair, contrasting her skin that bore freckles across the apples of her cheeks and nose. Her smile was white and welcoming.

She came over to where you were now standing. “Miss Nell Jackson. I hope you don’t mind me saying that you are the most ethereal woman I have ever met.”

You felt the apples of your cheeks turn warm, thanking her and offering her the seat next to yours. “Normally calling hours are for men interested in the ton’s ladies,” you smiled.

“I am very well aware of the rules, Miss Y/n. I hope you are not bothered by my presence. I assure you if you feel uncomfortable I can leave—“

“Would you like to get acquainted with the garden?” You cut her off, deep down knowing that even if it was unusual for a woman to call upon another, you didn’t want her to leave.

“I would be delighted to.” She smiled in agreement.

You guided her towards the hallways where you briefly met your mother’s confused stare with the shrug of your shoulder. It was different but you liked it.

In the garden you sat on the swings your father built before he died. You had asked her if she wanted to sit down on the bench but she insisted that the swings were just fine.

“Excuse me for being so direct, Miss Jackson, but I do not know you nor do I believe we have ever seen each other…how is it you know me?”

“I must admit I’ve admired you from afar the last few weeks and was unsure whether to visit you during calling hours. I hope you do not feel awkward about all this”

“I do not.” You smiled at her. “I am rather enjoying myself.”

Nell smiled softly, the sunlight reflecting in her eyes as you caught yourself staring at her lips. Gently pressing against each other as her feet pushed her back and forth.

“I suppose you are looking for a wife this season?”

“Indeed I am.”

“What do you look for?”

“If I may be so direct but I think I already found what I’ve been looking for.”

You raised your eyebrows ever so slightly, taken aback by her choice of words. You admitted that you were glad to know of her intentions. It had only been thirty minutes but they showed you her true kind hearted nature. You were immediately smitten with her.

“Is that so?”

“Yes.”

“Well then I hope we meet each other at the Fraser’s ball in the upcoming days. I hope you will write down your name on my card?”

“I will find you before the night ends.” She reached out to place a kiss on your hand.

You cleared your throat, “Shall we ehm go back, it is most inappropriate to spend more than thirty minutes alone.”

“Of course, Miss Y/n.”

Back at the house you said your goodbyes and joined your mamma back in the drawing room, picking up the book Colin had gifted you from his travels.

“You cannot see her again.” Your mamma came through the door as soon as you heard the front door close. “People will talk of this if they find out.” She braced herself against the sofa.

“Why?”

“Because a woman called on you, Y/n!” She raised her voice but you could tell she didn’t mean to. “It is not done.”

“But I like her,”

“It doesn’t matter.” She breathed out heavily. “What if Lady Whistledown were to know of this. The entirety of the ton would know by tomorrow morning.”

Just as she finished her sentence Eloise and Penelope joined the room. Penelope greeted you with a smile.

“Well I like her, Mama.” You stood up and walked towards the end of the room to start reading.

“What happened?” Eloise asked.

“A Miss Nell Jackson called on your sister today.”

“A woman?”

Your mamma nodded.

“How exhilarating.”

“We will not speak of this again.”

A few days later the newest edition of Lady Whistledown appeared on your front door.

Dearest gentle readers,

prepare your smelling salts and hold on to your bonnets, for a revelation that will set the ton abuzz. In a society where the heart's true desires are often overshadowed by rigid expectations and whispered disapproval, it is high time we lift the veil on a most beautiful truth: love, in all its splendid forms, deserves celebration.

This author has observed, with no small amount of admiration, the tender affections shared between individuals of the same sex. These connections, whether whispered in secret gardens or displayed with courage at the grandest of balls, are as genuine and profound as any other. They speak to the very essence of what it means to be human: the desire to love and be loved without constraint or fear.

So, let us cast aside the shackles of convention and prejudice. Let us embrace a society where love, whether between gentlemen, ladies, or any soul in between, is met with the same respect and honour we afford all tender unions. For is it not love, dear readers, that makes the world a more delightful place? The heart knows no bounds, and neither should our acceptance of its many splendid forms.

We are all the creations of God and if he disapproved of equal live then why create it at all?

Yours Truly, Lady Whistledown

Even weeks after Lady Whistdown’s controversial edition the ton was still abuzz. Whilst very few disagreed, the majority had agreed with what was written. Multiple people since then had come forward about their true loves. It made you think of Nell. The last time you saw her was at the ball. She danced with you despite everyone’s eyes on you and all their mouths whispering of the scene in front of them

By the time the ton had settled it was inevitable to try and make society disapprove of the past events that by the time Lord and Lady Smythe-Smith held their annual ball, multiple same sex couples attended.

You were upset that you hadn’t seen Nell for quite some time. Ever since Whistledown she had disappeared. She wasn’t seen at any balls or in society as a whole. Tonight's ball had you wearing a pink gown with the most beautiful necklace that had been left for you by an anonymous person. Standing by the lemonade table you silently sulked next to your mamma as you watched the others dance. You were about to lean your head on your mamma’s shoulder when suddenly a familiar face showed up in front of you.

“Lady Bridgerton, Miss Bridgerton, you must excuse my absence as I was unsure of what to do with the scandal that was the past weeks.” She admitted. “May I,” she turned her head to face you, “have your next dance?”

You looked at your mamma who slowly smiled and nodded, approving of your union.

“Yes I would like that very much.”

“I hope you don’t mind me writing my name down for all three dances?”

You let out a small laugh, “Not at all,”

“Beautiful necklace.”

“Someone sent it to me.”

“Do you know who it was?”

“Of course I know it was you, Nellie Jackson.” You whispered into her ear as you watched her smile, talking your arms and guiding you towards the dance floor.

[igotanidea]

Logical choice: Dick x reader part 1

summary: apparently he was in love with two girls and had to chose. Too bad his way of making a decision was worse than bad.

massive thanks to Laura @gone-batty-fics for proofreading this <3 <3 I'm terrible with punctuation xD

***

Being in love with a taken guy is like….

No, wait, scratch that.

There are no words to describe that.

How can you possibly find anything to use while saying how you feel when your brain goes short-circuits when you think about the guy you like with another girl and your heart is aching every time you see those two together?

How can you possibly explain the constant urge to cry and scream and lie down and die and throw up and sleep the pain away, all at the same time?

How many synonyms are there for the word hopeless?

Bet you were broken-hearted at least once in your life.

Y/N Y/L/N cursed the moment she met Dick Grayson, with his pretty smile, all his charm and his the golden retriever energy. All that niceness, chattiness, and everything he was and everything he wasn’t, got her mind spinning and falling faster then she could have imagined.

And she had no idea what to do about it.

Especially given the fact he quickly became one of her closest friends, which was shocking even to herself.

Y/N was usually the person to keep her walls up (hurt one too many times), act rather cold and distant, not getting involved with feelings (she was not very good with that and her poor boy experience made her cautious). But hey, the heart wants what it wants and Dick Grayson had a way of getting her to open up, laugh, and just be her unfiltered self. He didn't seem to mind her innate sarcasm and twisted sense of humor. Maybe, since he didn't hate her genuine self, she could make it work?

here was some undeniable connection between them.  Maybe even something more than friendship, but for some reason none of them were able to speak their minds, instead circling around the subject, unable to meet in the middle.

Truly tragic how two souls yearning for one another could not connect just because the owners of those bodies were too shy and stubborn to say three words: I like you.

Even more tragic given the fact that Dick’s family were quick to notice something simmering under the surface, but decided to stay back since apparently it was none of their business.

Until.

***

“You do realize he’s in love with you?”

“What are you talking about?” Y/N frowned at Jason’s words. “Who are you talking about?”

This took her by surprise. Jason Todd wasn’t usually the person to go around gossiping and well, to be honest talking at all. He was the brooding type sitting in the corner, watching everyone with a murderous gaze trying to cover up for the fact how much he needed love and attention, instead using sarcasm to hide his vulnerability and sensitivity. Maybe, throwing a cutting, teasing comment from time to time, but this? This was completely not his style. And it made Y/N a bit uncomfortable.

“Cause I can’t watch you pining like this.” Jason scoffed, “It’s pathetic, you know” he almost rolled his eyes at the girl.

“You are pathetic, Todd.”She retorted, but couldn’t help the blush creeping on her cheeks and the sudden rise in her heartbeat. “What’s your business with gossiping? We’re not friends.”

“I know we’re not,.” Jason shrugged, “but apparently I’m the only one with the balls big enough to - ”

“Don’t flatter yourself,.” She cut him off with a smirk raising a gaze from her book,

“Is that what I get for helping you make your crazy little fantasy come true?”

“What fantasy,” she cried out in desperate confusion “Stop speaking in riddles!”

“You want to be with Dick. Whenever he's around, your eyes and body language practically scream it," he said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“You’re reading way too much Jane Austen,.” she muttered, “And what’s with the silent creeping on me!?”

“I’m trying to help you out here!”

“No, you’re mocking me!”

“Y/N!” Jason cried out in frustration, not sure how to put his point forward without Y/N accusing him of being mean. He was not good with words, despite all his literature knowledge.

"What?!"

Y/N was fully aware that she was acting erratically, but the realization that being 'more than friends' with Dick was even a possibility? All of her logical thinking was suddenly on a very long foreign holiday.

“He fucking loves you!”

“And how the fuck do you know that?!”

“You’re unbelievable!”

“I’m just being cautious! I don’t need a broken heart!”

Jason exhaled deeply. Apparently he had to be the reasonable one here. He had known a lot about being insecure.

“Come on, Y/N… I’m not lying. Really. Why would I?”

“Do you really want me to answer that question,?” she asked, her eyebrows raised sceptically..

“Look…..”

“No you look, Jason…..” she raised her gaze at him, exposing all her vulnerability “I’m scared, ok?”

“I know. Trust me, I’ve been there. Still am…..”

“Why does it sound like you’re trying to use me as a guinea pig?”

“Huh?” her words got him confused

“You want to test whether it’s worth taking a risk, don’t you? Whether confessing is something that can actually end up in a good way?”

“Maybe a little.” Jason smirked

“Now that’s more like you.”

“Does it convince you though?”

She took a second to consider. Did it? Were Jason’s words enough to make her act on her feelings? To go to Dick and tell him how she feels? To create an opportunity to have a relationship? To be … happy in love, without all this worry.

“Yes…..” she whispered. 

“Yes?” Jason mocked clearly egging her on. 

“Fucking yes," she cried out, feeling a sudden surge of power and omnipotence.

“He’s in the batcave.”

She moved towards the door, ready to go and finish it all once and for all, to clear the messed up situation she found herself in. But before she rushed to the love of her life there was one more thing she had to do.

“Thanks, Todd. You’re not as bad as you try to look.”

“Keep that detail to yourself, will ya Y/N?” Jason said as he winked at her, being content she actually decided to listen to his advice and not see him as a villain.

***

“Dick…..?”

Poor Y/N had to fight the urge to burst into the cave reaching the speed limit of Flash. It was like all those years of holding back her true feeling finally made her crumble and the façade broke down and she needed to tell him now, now, NOW!!

“Y/N?” he sent her his signature smile, turning up from behind the computer and taking a few steps towards her. It was truly touching how he always stood up whenever she was in the room, like a scene from a freaking regency era London. “everything good?” the man added seeing her reddened cheeks and shining eyes. “you look sick……” he involuntarily put his palm to the woman’s forehead checking her temperature.

Sick in love….. she thought to herself, but obviously couldn’t use that particular wording.

“I’m good….I’m good….” She shook her head “I just have to tell you something …… something important and ……”

“Hey Y/N…..” another voice chimed into the talk, causing Y/N to crash with reality.

“Babs…..?”

It didn’t have to mean anything, right? The fact that Dick and Babs were all alone in the batcave? Surely they just talked about some Batman stuff Y/N was not let into?

She was not let in.

And that was emphatic enough, almost as if she wasn’t a part of the team.

Y/N blinked a couple times realizing she was so focused on Dick’s face, eyes and just generally on him, that ironically she didn’t notice his slightly messed up hair and blushing cheeks alongside with his disheveled shirt.

Oh…..

Her gaze involuntarily traveled to the other woman, eyes widening at the way her shirt were open, her bra revealed and the love bite on her neck visible.

Oh, shit…..

Fucking Todd…..

“What is it Y/N?” Dick asked fixing his hair, his blue piercing, concerned eyes focused on her. “Hey? Y/N? come back to earth…..” he put a hand on her shoulder gently trying to bring her back.

“What….?” Her mind was racing, her hands were trembling, her legs was close to giving up on her. She could barely register what was happening when Dick grabbed her hand and forced her to sit on the chair scared she might faint.

“Y/n……?”

His voice reached her as if through a fog.

“She looks so pale…..”Babs was equally concerned now, and her tone finally made Y/N snap back to reality.

“And she’s back….” Grayson crouched next to her chair, smiling at her softly “you got us worried, it was like your soul left your body for a moment.”

Well, not so far from the truth, was it……?

“Sorry….”she muttered, averting her gaze from Dick’s, but he was not going to take the bullshit, grabbing her chin gently and forcing her eyes on him.

“You wanted to tell me something?”

“Yes…. No…. I mean……”

“Y/N……?”

“So you two are a couple now?” she blurted the first thing that came to her mind, even though saying those words out loud made her sick to the stomach.

“Yeah…..” Dick blushed a little looking at Barbara, who had a similar expression on her face. “Life’s funny, right? Old friend who’s been around all the time, never really seen like a love interest and yet……” he smiled even more, interlacing his fingers with Bab’s.

It was supposed to be me!! Her inner voice cried out desperately bringing not only the sickness to the stomach but also a terrible headache.

“I’m so happy for you two…..” Y/N forced a smile. Fucking hypocrite.

“Thanks…..” the other woman beamed “I know how important you are to Dick so I was worried about your reaction of us getting together”

“Worried?” Y/N laughed only to cover for the scowl forming in the back of her throat “oh, you silly one…. You two match each other perfectly! I mean, Nightwing and Batgirl, it couldn’t get any better than this, right? Besides you …..we… know each other for so long…..it was bound to happen.”

I have to get out… I have to get out of here now!

“It really means a lot Y/N….. I’ve been wondering whether…..” Dick added and for a single second there was something inexplicable in his eyes, but he blinked and it was gone immediately. “nevermind…..”

Yeah, right, nevermind…..

***

It’s been two weeks of torture

Two weeks of bitterness.

Complete disaster.

Y/N was depressed, Dick was torn, Babs was confused and the atmosphere was far from friendly, since everyone could feel the tension and members of batfamily were trying their best to not takes sides, which was probably the greatest challenge.

But as the situation progressed, the one with the least experience in human relationships just had to break the peace. Forced, but peace nonetheless.

It was typical Friday afternoon and they were just hanging around, released from patrol, ready to have a movie night in the manor. Dick, Babs, Jason, Tim, Damian, Steph, Cass and Y/N, who were currently fighting with her own head and mind producing every excuse possible for a rain check on the marathon.

“why don’t you just tell him?”

“Hello to you too, Damian.”

“don’t change the subject Y/L/N.”

“Tell what to who?” she mocked almost rolling her eyes

“Don’t play dumb. It doesn’t work well for you.” Damian said with his usual flat tone.

“That does sound awfully like an indirect compliment…..”

“Just tell Grayson you like him.”

“You what?” oh, shit, the person in question was now standing in the door of the room, his eyes wide in shock, his whole posture screaming the feeling of betrayal.

“Dick….I…..”

“Shit, Y/n!”

“Stop yelling at me!”

“You’re the one yelling!”

“Do you want me to record your voice right now!?”

“You’re in love with me?!”

“How is that bad?!”

“Cause I’m with Barbara now!”

“Yeah, no shit!”

They were getting nowhere with this discussion and to tell the truth, neither of them probably wanted to. It was just dumping everything that’s been eating away at their livers. Suddenly Dick and Y/N found themselves in an unknown territory, their feelings completely exposed, unsure how to proceed without getting hurt and/or damaging one another.

Well there was not a good way out and at the moment screaming was something that at least helped them getting all that pain, fear and hurt out in the open.

“You can’t do that Y/N!”

“Maybe if you had the guts to tell me how you felt first it wouldn’t come to this!” she spat at him

“How I felt….?” Dick stuttered, clearly taken aback “what do you mean?”

“nothing….” She muttered, calming down in an instant. He was not supposed to know that she knew.

“Y/N!”

“fuck you!”

Whoops. Shit. Too much.

She was acting crazy, yes, but come on, cut her some slack, she was broken-hearted and a person with a damaged heart never acts sane.

“If that’s what you truly want then ok, fuck me….. you’re just making it so easy to make a choice here, Y/N!”

“You said it yourself, you are with Babs now!”

“It doesn’t change how I feel about you!”

“You what….?”

“You think I can just turn it off or something!?”

“Dick….”

“No….. no you’re right… I’m with Babs…..”

God damn it! It was like walking in circles. Two adults behaving in a worse way than kids in the kindergarten and no one could possibly stop the incoming storm.

***

And now she was in love with a taken guy.

A taken guy who could have been hers if only she was slightly faster to confess.

Apparently timing is everything and instead of being happy in love she was now forced to grit her teeth whenever dick and Babs were around together.

Which was pretty much all the time.

Well, they were pretty much together all the time before, but not like together together.

Maybe Y/N should have known…..

It was highly unlikely that a vigilante would keep his relationship with a civilian and much more probable that he would end up with another self-appointed crime fighter.

And Dick seemed happy so what was she supposed to do apart from dwelling in poorly hidden misery and listening to sad love songs while facing the ceiling with one single question in her mind.

What if…..?

***

The second dick saw Y/N in the cave a week ago, noticed her sad, confused and a bit lost expression he knew. Y/N loved him the same way he loved her.

But he was with Babs now. He felt for the Batgirl and was not going to leave. That would be a shitty thing to do, right? To leave a girl just because he what? Got bored? Changed his mind or went through a change of heart?

On the other hand, however, how shitty it was to do this to Y/N? He’s been in love with her for so long, always keeping his mouth shut about it, hoping she would somehow figure it out. And now, that she was finally ready to make it a reality, he was with another girl.

Get yourself together, Dick. You can’t just back out on Barbara. You’re with her now. You love her.

But Y/N…..

His first true love.. from a very young age, even before he knew what love was. All those years of waiting only to give up on the final stretch.

And the vulnerability he saw in her whole posture every time she was around. Those pretty doe eyes that never looked at him ever since the scene at the batcave.

They were still friends, sort of, at least, because to tell the whole truth, the situation between them was more than awkward.

And he was very well aware he would have to choose between two girls, because being stuck in a situation like this, with all the knowledge he had, was way too much for him.

Too bad he chose a very devious way to make a decision.

***

"What is it?" Y/N asked upon seeing a single piece of paper in Tim's hands.

"Nothing!"

"Oh, come on, let me see...."

"Trust me on this, you don't want to." Tim shook his head passing the object to Dick, who quickly tossed it to Jason, who was standing the furthest from Y/n.

"All right, fine" Y/N shrugged "I won’t be playing your silly games here...." before any of the boys realized what was happening she snuck past Jason and ripped the paper from him, her eyes immediately focusing on the printed text.

"What.....?" she stuttered, running her eyes on the words yet unable to make any sense of them "Dick?" her hurt expression killed him at the spot.

"It was Jason's idea!" the man cried out as if that could serve as an excuse.

"Yeah, here's the part I was hoping would not come out." Jason muttered

"Y/N." the girl started reading out loud "cons. Tend to live in her own world. Keep her walls up. Stubborn as hell..... Wow.....Just.... just wow." A single gasp was enough of an indication of her emotional state.

“there are also plus points……..?” he almost cringed once those words left his mouth.

“How could you Dick….?”

"Y/n...." Dick took a step forward, realizing that Jason and Tim have already fled the room leaving him to deal with Y/N and her obvious pain alone. Cowards.

"On the other side " she instantly moved back, out of his reach "Barbara. Pluses and weaknesses..... You were comparing us like this? THAT was your way to decide......? By using what? Fucking logic? By trying to decide which one of us is more useful or something……? " her voice broke and she was unable to finish the sentence, while tears started brimming in her eyes.  

That was like a whole new level of betrayal. Like her heart was ripped out and tossed into the gutter.

"Y/n... please, it's not what it looks like...."

"It's exactly what it is. To put it simply, you just treated me like a goat for sale……”

"Please, let me explain.... Please, I'm begging you...."

“Just leave me alone!” she cried out running out to hide in the manor library, possibly the only place that could have given her some sort of comfort and shelter.

"Good luck with making it right, Dickhead...." Jason reappeared just in time to see Y/N rush past the hallway.

"Shut up!" Dick ran his hands through his hair in utter desperation, barely restraining from tearing them all out. It would be so much easier to blame it all on his brother and his stupid idea but deep inside Dick knew it was on him. He never should have listened to the bad advice in the first place.

Of course he was going to choose Y/N.

And there was never any reason to make some stupid list. How could there be when there has always been just one option to begin with?

And now, as much as he wanted Y/N, not Barbara, she was not going to forgive him for not letting his heart decide, but focusing on what seemed more comfortable.

How fucking selfish was that?

[agir1ukn0w]

my fellow kanthony shippers, I have returned to the kanthony fandom in order to address a rumor of a most disturbing nature that has reached me: that some of you (not all of you ofc) have apparently been very rude, bordering on nasty and downright vulgar, towards not only polin shippers but also to the actual real-life human beings who portray Colin and Penelope, openly criticizing their looks and their bodies online in full view of everyone where these two actors will most definitely see such hurtful things. I know this to be a scandalous falsehood (again, of the majority of the kanthony fandom), though not wishing to suppose it true I came here to make my sentiments known and to let those of you who are guilty of this know that if Jane Austen HERSELF could see what you do and what you say, she would call you obstinate, insipid, AND ill-bred (in that order) and then she would walk away and never speak to you again, if she could in fact speak to you, that is.

I know for a fact that the larger kanthony fandom is a beautiful place filled with beautiful people, and we need to be better representing ourselves as such when the new season comes out. I think that most of us can accept the fact that it’s Polin’s time to shine now (whether you like them or not), and to ship and let ship. That is all, thank you for reading.

[azrielgreen]

I wanted to write this before I read today’s surprise (🥹) chapter of SS to say… 

I’ve spent the last couple years knee DEEP in interdisciplinary trauma theory, with a focus on literature (suffice it to say, ya girls read a looooot of trauma depictions) and I just wanted to let you know- your depictions of trauma hit such a sweet spot for me both academically and personally. 

I’ve read and lectured on multi-award winning novels that deal with trauma in such a careless way that I have lifelong vendetta’s against their crusty-ass authors and the lectures I gave were essentially a 45 minute roast. It’s a pretty open secret that people who’ve experienced trauma are drawn to study it/depict it/explore it through art so…also suffice it to say, I’ve got some personal dogs in this fight 🫡. 

You write undoubtedly graphic and challenging trauma but a big key difference is that, for me, there’s a palpable and rich seam of care that runs through all your work. There is a lack of authorial judgement meaning you can craft fully realised characters that, despite sometimes grotesque actions, never completely escape feelings of empathy or sympathy. 

Have I finished chapters and had to go outside and do a lap of my building to work off the feeling I might puke? For sure. Did I also feel that way the entire time I was falling in love with my partner because big feelings make me pukey? Also 100% accurate. Do I LOVE reading shit that makes me feel that way KNOWING there’s the Jane Austen safety-net of happy endings? Absofuckinglutelyyyyy 

I love that you write purely for an audience of one, I think that makes your work that bit more engrossing. It lacks that self-consciousness so much writing has where you can feeeeel the writer is always trying so hard to convince the reader it’s worth reading…you don’t need to convince YOURSELF so you save a lot of time and awkwardness and we all benefit besides. 

Basically, you’re a babe of the first water. I felt compelled to tell you all this because I think everyone could always do with hearing what a gift they are, especially when they share something so rare and special with strangers. 

Thank you xx 

Please everyone take a second thread this if you can because this is the encapsulation of why I share what I write. This means the fucking world to me. Today was so hard for me, I've been sick and couldn't write and had no sleep at all but this really truly made me feel warm inside. Thank you, darling. Thank you so much💜💜💜

[wexhappyxfew]

"Hello, love! Could you please write from seeking out physical affection”, specifically comparing hand sizes, holding their hands against each other's, and then just holding hands” Could you also add a kiss on the cheek? For Judy and Rosie.

Tarzan and Jane vibes!

P.S Resending this, because I forgot to say that it is for Judy and Rosie 😆

Love you ❤️

AH HELLO!!!!! thank you so so much for sending this in! both you and @archival-hogwash sent in Judy x Rosie for this AND the same prompt so i hope you *both* enjoy this one!!!! i certainly had a GREAT time writing this, as i haven't done judy x rosie in what feels like AGES!!!!! SO!!! this is probably one of my favorite things for judy and rosie because we really get into their connection on multiple levels, along with their emotions and a piece purely focused on them. i would say this is purely self-indulgent on my part haha! so, i truly hope you enjoy! <3 THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN BOTH OF YOU!! :D

know it's you

(a/n): to the judy x rosie girlies, your joy and support and love for this duo has truly transcended, and so this piece is for you! judy rybinski is an OC i hold incredibly near and dear to my heart and it seems she's made quite the impact as well. plus - her and rosie make my heart melt and there's a whole lot of that here. so please, truly, enjoy! :) definitely love the jane/tarzan vibes in the gifs too hehe - that's so them in ways!!! AND -- to the judy anons earlier talking and asking about judy's past, we see a bit of why that is important to her character right here! ps — there’s some intimacy here but nothing super intense past that! just incase there are some not interested parties!

The barracks were much emptier these days - it still housed the Silver Bullets group, but with them 40% down their normal crew, which was now dispersed halfway across continental Europe, with the other 60% obtaining various positions in the air and on base - quiet was the new normal.

It was an off day and Judy hadn't been one to complain - they'd been doing missions and training relentlessly for days and by this point, to say the exhaustion wasn't getting to her would be a whole other level of lying lunacy. She'd had dinner with the rest of the girls - Dougie joining in beside Carrie because ever since they'd seemed to silently make it official between them, they'd been attached at the hip when they didn't have to be apart.

By that point, everyone else had gone out to the flying club, but Judy wanted nothing more than to curl up in bed and read the rest of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen - she'd gotten close to the part with the love confession - she could feel it.

Freshly showered, hair nearly dry as it clung to her nightshirt and neck, she sat crossed-legged sideways on her bed, back leaned up against the wall of the barracks, listening to the silent hum of all the bugs outside, the crackle of voices somewhere in the distance and the hum of the lantern light turned on beside her.

If this was peace, she never wanted to let go of it.

It was almost a weird comfort that reminded her of training days - first getting the group of women together when Birdie had called on a crew. Meeting the girls, hanging out late into their off-day nights, talking, hearing peoples' stories and backgrounds and family history. By that point, Judy had taken to wearing her PT shorts to bed with one of the pale wool button-ups that Birdie had requested for the crew. Now, cuddled with her blanket, her button-up and her book, she was as happy as a damn lark. A gentle knock came from the door.

"You in there, Judy?" the voice called through. The corner of Judy's lip drew upwards.

"Who's asking?" She knew. She always did. She grinned wider.

"Who do you think?" the voice called back, a slight chuckle on their lips.

"I don't know…."Judy called back, "kinda hard to distinguish entirely with a wooden door breaking up the noise." She heard the laugh behind the door and couldn't help but take a split-second to brush her lose strands of hair behind her ears and rub a bit underneath her eyes, hoping the dark circles weren't as big as they had been earlier.

"Am I good to come in?"

"All clear." Judy called back. The door slowly pushed open and Judy couldn't help but feel her heart spin a bit out of control at the sight of Rosie Rosenthal stepping inside, crusher cap perched on his head, layered in his A2 and button-up, that look on his face that was a mixture of soft worry and concern all at once.

"Hi." Judy said, watching as he shut the barrack door behind him, waltzing over towards her with that silent look on his face and lips.

"Hey." he said back, pulling over one of the chairs from a table and placing it beside her cot and settling himself into the chair comfortably before leaning forward, "You doing okay? Didn't see you at the officers' club." She could feel the tension in her shoulders slowly unknotting at his worrying question, watching him peel off the A2 and crusher cap; it only took her a matter of seconds to slowly nod, a small smile on her face as she tilted her head.

"Yes," she said quietly, "just didn't feel up for being out tonight, I'll be honest. What about you though?" Rosie watched her as she let her eyes gently draw over his entire face, taking in each aspect of his eyes, his cheeks, his lips that made her feel all over the place on the inside. He grinned.

"Well, I'm glad you're here then," he said quietly with a nod, "sometimes you need a night away." She grinned. "I was at the officers' club. But, I don't know….didn't feel up for being out tonight. Wanted to come and see what you were up to." Judy let out a laugh and gently closed her book and leaned towards him over her crossed legs with a smile.

"Thanks for joining me then," Judy said, "can't promise to be as much entertainment as Dougie thinking he can dance, but….I can tell some pretty good campfire stories around the potbelly stove, I must admit." Rosie chuckled at her words, before looking up at her with a quiet look on his face, blue eyes watching her intently.

Rosie Rosenthal was like that though - he knew there was more behind it. He always did and with the way his mood had shifted, she knew in an instance that he'd been worrying for her longer than just the past hour when he came to see her. He could be in the flying club with the rest of the crews, drinking, having a grand old time, but instead he was here. With her.

"Just you here?" Rosie asked her, a slight tinge of concern in his voice and Judy nodded.

"It's okay," Judy said, looking down at her nails and picking at the edges of them with a shrug, "the other girls needed a night and I just wasn't feeling it. Didn't want them to miss out though. And sometimes just being here is what I need." Judy nodded towards the four usually empty and fresh-made cots. "Sometimes it's like they're here, ya know?"

They glanced towards the footlockers and cots across from Judy - mainly at the end of what was still Lieutenant Bradshaw's cot. Francis generally didn't allow anyone to touch it, open it, hardly even look at it. She always told people that they were coming back - if there was no word on any of the missing members of Silver Bullets or their bodies - they weren't dead. It'd be there until they got back. And Judy always believed Francis, she always did.

Judy couldn't help but feel her emotions wrangle with her heart as she stared at those four lone footlockers, untouched for months, cots forever-made on that last morning they'd been here.

The chair screeched slightly closer and she felt warmth overwhelm her hands, Rosie's large palms taking her small fists into his own hands, the nerves and tension immediately seeming to dissipate. Looking back towards him, she couldn't help but feel a small smile grow on her face, his face inches from her own.

"They're still out there," Rosie whispered quietly, his thumb running circles underneath the knuckles on her left hand, "I know that." Judy slowly nodded, knowing her words would fail her if she tried to talk. Rosie seemed to catch that in a matter of seconds and let out a deep breath.

"Tell me about what you were reading," he said quietly, nearly therapeutically, "that's a good one."

"You've read it?"

"I have." Rosie said, his voice a soothing sound to her ears, "When you have sisters, they convince you to read books like that." Judy gave him a look and he chuckled. "Didn't complain, I promise." Judy laughed lightly, eyes growing soft at his gaze on her as she smiled lazily.

"Mr. Darcy has just confessed his love for Elizabeth Bennet." Judy said quietly, retracting one of her hands to reach up and brush her fingers past some of his lose curls near his forehead, smiling slightly at the chill racing across his body underneath her touch, the way his eyes shut slightly and a small breath left his lips, "I would say it didn't entirely go as planned, but it has been one of my favorite things to read, I must say."

"You think it's a good book so far?" he asked her quietly, and she nodded, hand continuing to slowly careen back and forth over those few curls on his forehead.

"It blows some other books I've read out of the water." she said and she watched as he grinned, his eyes refusing to leave hers as he continued to watch her, the two of them falling into silence.

Watching each other in this quiet way was far more intimate than anything else she'd experienced in life and she hadn't experienced much. Her hand running through his hair, his hands holding her other, inches from each other's faces. Inches.

They each seemed to linger closer to one another, their eyes holding one another's gazes and she found herself welcoming his touch up onto her neck, the warmth making her whole body feel as if it were on fire.

It was always this.

Never touching this way, but still going to an extent before they'd back away. But now, they were alone and it was a warm, spring night and it was different; she wanted to feel something different than grief and loss.

Feeling his fingers grow up her neck towards her cheeks, her eyes shut at his touch; it was a little crazy to think about how close they were, his touch on her neck and face, breath fanning across her face. Maybe this crush wasn't as stupid as she had thought it to be. She was scared to open her eyes that had since closed and look at him, feeling his continual warm breath inches from her lips.

Kiss me, her voice seemed to whisper inside her head, please kiss me. His thumb brushed her warm cheek and she shivered a bit at the touch.

"You're shaking." Rosie whispered, and she shivered again, her heart racing inside her chest. She couldn't look at him. She couldn't do it.

"You make me nervous." she whispered back, her voice sounding light, almost like she was floating. Slowly, she opened her eyes - he was right there. He was so close, staring at her face like she was staring at something holy. His eyes were beautiful so close to her face, deep and caring and full. She had never been touched by someone like him, cared for, held and loved by.

"May I kiss you?" he whispered, his own voice sounding strained, "Please?"

"Please do." she whispered and it was in what felt like milliseconds where she was engulfed by him. His arms wrapped around her back, pulling her into him, his lips pressing earnestly against her own, her body snaking into his lap on the chair and her hands crawling into his hair and messing up those curls that were so perfectly done day in and day out.

Judy melted into him, his hands going up her back into her neckline, her body hot all over the place it felt as he tugged at her bottom lip, a small sigh escaping as she pressed her lips back to his.

It was such a quick-paced and desperate array of kisses - something she had never even experienced in her life. Rosie made a noise at the back of his throat, which made Judy pull back for a second, almost caught off guard - she'd never done this before, what was she even doing - were her hands in the right place? Could she even kiss well enough for it to be worth it? Did it mean anything? For him? For her? For them?

"Hey, you okay?" managed Rosie, trying to catch his breath, his lips a deep red - she realized she'd been sucking a bit on his bottom lip - his cheeks an equally similar color.

"Yeah, yeah," Judy said, her body clinging onto him with her arms and legs latched around his frame, "fine, this….wow."

Words, Judy, words.

It was so intimate to be so close to his face, almost like it was some secret thing no one had ever gotten the pleasure of doing before. She stared at him and watched as he licked his lips and glanced at her lips.

"Just…." Judy started as he watched her, his hands softly clinging to her back, his fingertips sending sparks along the fabric atop her skin, "I…..I've never been like this with someone."

"Like this?" Rosie whispered back, reaching up a hand to clutch at her cheek, brushing her flaming skin and smiling. Judy nodded.

"This….close." Judy whispered, "But for the first time in my life, I trust someone to be like this with." Rosie stared at her, a tender look on his face.

"I feel safe with you." Judy said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. Rosie continued to watch her and then smiled.

"Thank you." he whispered softly back, "I feel safe with you, too." Judy felt her heart skip a beat - multiple beats if anything - and smiled.

Within seconds of such a thing to say, Judy was kissing him, wrapping her body around him, pulling her hands up through his hair, every part of her body feeling her heart continuing to race faster and faster.

There was a deep-seeded need, but gentleness that came with his touch to her lips, the exhaustion of the day ever-present, but the want to feel showing in ways she couldn't quite understand as he deepened the kiss there in front of the fire. He slowly bit at her bottom lip as they parted, the two of them shaking, deep labored breaths escaping their lips as Judy slowly looked upwards towards Rosie, staring at his eyes in the quiet darkness that evaded nearly all the light. Judy's hands slowly moved down from his hair to his olive button-up, her fingertips dancing on the buttons.

"Do it." Rosie whispered, his breathing heavy, "It's yours." Just those words seemed to flip a switch in her head as she slowly, button by button undid both the shirt and him.

As she came to the bottom, his bare chest began to show and she slowly let her hands move towards his shoulders, peeling the fabric from his form, down his arms and to the ground. Her body was on fire, as she looked back up towards him, staring at her with those darkened blue eyes that made her go slightly insane. His hands lingered on her waist, hers on his now bare arms, their bated breath held for a moment as they watched one another.

Every movement made her want more, every look, every touch.

Everything made her live with want. Her hands slowly trailed down to his own hands, which felt like they were equally on fire, and she slowly guided them to the front of her wool button-up.

"Judy…." Rosie whispered. She slowly looked up and met his firm gaze and she sucked in a breath. It was so insanely attractive to her to know he was looking at her like this. She leaned slightly closer, still holding his hands to the buttons and watched his gaze.

"Will you help me?" she whispered.

"Yes." Rosie said, almost without any hesitation and immediately began unbuttoning her top, her heart pounding, the need growing.

As soon as the button on the bottom was undone, the top slid off her shoulders to expose her bare chest - and if she was honest, her rather sorry-excuse of a bra - his lips were pressing on her own and goosebumps danced over her skin at the slightly cool air and his touch. His lips were so gentle and soft, placed there on her own, a distant hunger behind each deepening of touch that made her crave more.

Taking in a shuddering breath, his lips moved to a tender spot on her neck and a small noise in the back of her throat escaped - it was almost so light-hearted as Rosie pulled back and softly tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and chuckled that soft, breathy laugh.

"You okay?" he whispered and she looked to him, a smile on her breathless face as she looked at him.

"Yeah," she whispered shakily, "yeah. Wow." Rosie smiled at her through the darkness before slowly leaning forward and bringing her into another kiss, him biting her lip, a groan from the back of his throat and a whimper from her own mouth.

The slight grind of his body against hers was making it much harder to just focus on him and his lips. He was kissing her neck again, his lips exploring the whole of her neck, arching down to her collarbone as her eyes shut and far too many pleasant thoughts entered her brain. She was unbecoming in front of him, as he clung to her in a God-like way.

Slowly, Rosie shifted, clutching her to him and moving her to the cot, the blanket soft on her back as he laid her there and then pressed down onto her, his larger form a comforting weight there on top of her.

God, if someone walked in now, what would she say?

But, it was Rosie.

With Rosie, she was safe.

Rosie sucked on her neck, before pulling back for a second, his entire body shuttering as he looked towards her and then smiled, hovering overtop of her and softly kissing her forehead.

"You're one of the most beautiful women I've ever met." he whispered softly, eyes honest, almost like he spoke and got choked up in the middle and recovered.

"Thank you." she whispered back, her own throat choking up as she stared at him, the light from the lantern tickling his features, making his face a honey gold.

No one ever had told her such things, touching her and holding her as gently as he had, caring for her like he did. Rosie smiled and then Judy followed, a giggle along with it. Then, they were kissing, their bodies pressed against each other again.

At some point, his lips were on her collarbone and her lips had traversed his face and neck and then they were curled into each other's bodies, as he traced her bare back with a warm finger and she stared at his soft, cuddly face that she planted a kiss to every so often.

Rosie Rosenthal was shy when he wanted to be, but he was nowhere shy about where he wanted to put his hands and mouth.

But in this moment, quiet and intimate, all she could do was watch him.

"I'll admit, I've never been like this with someone," she whispered quietly as his light finger touch sent chills down her spine, "I'm sorry if my kissing didn't offer much." Rosie watched her and then shook his head with a playful scoff, and continued tracing her back.

"Don't say that," Rosie whispered quietly and then brought his lips to her ear, "your lips were reverent."

Judy could feel her body get hot just at his words and slowly turned to look at him as they lied there under the blanket. Her heart pounded as her cheeks grew hot, staring at his devastatingly handsome face watch her right back, like he could see all of her - which in ways, he definitely could.

She leaned forward and captured his lips again in hers, hungrily deepening the kiss, both their lips red and swollen as she bit down tenderly and a groan filled his mouth. She was sinking underneath him as he deepened the kiss against her lips this time. His warm hands were dancing across her bare-skinned chest and eventually reached the waistline of her shorts.

And the second she felt a finger on her waistline, her entire body grew cold and froze. She stopped kissing him, her lips growing shut, her eyes blasted wide-open and her shoulders immediately tense. Rosie pulled back in an instant, his hands on her cheeks gently, his own eyes open above her, worry pooling in his blue eyes as he looked down.

"You okay, Judy?" he whispered quietly, slightly out of breath, "We can stop." Judy looked at him, her eyes suddenly filling with tears she hadn't quite expected.

She didn't want to cry, why was she crying. No, no, no.

"Oh, hey, hey, c'mere." Judy put a hand over her mouth, Rosie coming off the top of her, reaching over the edge of the bed to grab his collared button-up. As tears grew down her cheeks, Rosie gently guided her arms into the long sleeves of his button-up, pulling it overtop her bare shoulders, before slowly buttoning it up, button by button.

"C'mere, Judy." Rosie whispered quietly, positioning himself sitting up against the pillows on the cot, allowing her to curl into his body, head snuggled against his bare chest, comforted by his presence, the scent of his shirt that always smelled like that pleasant cologne he always wore, and the quietness of the world surrounding them, "You okay, Jude?"

Whenever he kept repeating her name, it always brought her back, it allowed her to ground herself and think and keep her mind clear. Because it usually meant he was trying to get through to her and calm her down. And it always worked.

Judy could feel his hand around her waist, his other hand gently brushing through her hair, over and over in the most soothing manner. A mixture of embarrassment and guilt hit her in that moment curled beside him.

Would he think that he'd done something wrong?

Would he not like her because she couldn't do it?

Whatever it really was?

Would he think she was too inexperienced and naive?

Would he-?

"I'm sorry," she whispered out against his chest, the tears continuing to well in her eyes as she let out a shaky breath, "I just….it's me."

"No, no, it's okay," Rosie whispered quietly above her, gently pressing a kiss to her head - she could hear the smile in his voice, "it's okay." Judy snuggled closer into him and let out another shaky sigh.

"I'm not ready," she whispered through tears, "to do that yet. I'm sorry."

"No, no," Rosie said quietly - quickly, "don't apologize. You don't have to apologize to me, okay? Or…better yet, at all. You're ready when you're ready and if it's not yet, that's okay." Judy slowly peaked up at him, red-rimmed eyes, her nose probably getting drippy, looking far less unpleasant than she had earlier.

"Are you sure?" she asked him quietly and he gave her the sweetest smile she'd ever seen.

"I am." he said quietly, reaching up to brush at some tears on her cheeks, "I just want to be with you, Judy, that's all. In anyway I can." Her heart released the tension it had held for a brief moment and she nodded, a small smile peaking out.

"There's that grin," he whispered, pressing another kiss to her forehead this time, "there it is." Judy smiled wider and couldn't help but press closer to him, trying to gain access to every part of him there, curled into him in anyway she could. In a quick second though - she came quickly to the realization of what had just occurred and looked up at him.

Kissing him, kissing Rosie Rosenthal, kissing him the way she had and him kissing her back with just as much desperation as she did to him.

"That was my first kiss." Judy whispered quietly, staring out in front of them, towards where the sun had finally set out that little window, "My first….anything like that."

Maybe Judy should've held off saying that because Rosie froze there beside her, the hand on her hair going still, the hand on her waist tightening. She slowly peaked up at him and saw him watching her, a mixture of worry and concern mixed in his eyes and maybe a slight bit of nervousness that wasn't there before? She sat up a bit, and reached forward with her free hand that wasn't tucked against her body and lightly brushed her fingers against his face, smiling automatically, his own grin growing on his face afterwards.

"I'm…quite honored to be your first, Judy." he said quietly, the nervousness in his voice probably one of the cutest things she'd heard in a while, "Firsts are always special, so…."

"You always make everything special for me, you know that?" she said quietly, tilting her head against him, "That was really special though. Truly." Rosie watched her with that soft grin and she couldn't help but lean forward and press a soft kiss to his lips, the quickness of the familiarity of his lips almost insane to her - that her body could so instantly store in her mind the touch and feel of his lips just like that, his presence, his touch, him. Pulling back slightly, she watched him.

"Even if my first didn't…..go all the way, I guess." she said.

A few years ago, she remembered when all the towns girls would talk about their firsts - she remembered some were even getting married or having their first born! And there'd been Judy, waiting and waiting. Feeling left behind, embarrassed, too quiet not to say anything, too much of an outlier to say that she felt she was behind in the first place.

In her mind, she knew she was being too hard on herself, but it was something about her past few years that did it to her. But Rosie was stopping that and telling her there was no rush - he just wanted to be there. With her. And that was more important than anything.

"It doesn't have to," Rosie said quietly, cupping her cheek and smiling tenderly, "it doesn't need to. It's whatever you want it to be. And to even just….know it's you…." Judy watched him, eyes darting back and forth between his eyes as her cheeks slowly heated, despite the realization she'd been heavily making out with him moments earlier. He'd probably always have that effect on her.

"Know it's me?" she whispered. Rosie smiled, lovingly running his hand back through her hair before coming to dote underneath her chin, raising it up gently and pressing a kiss to her lips.

"Yes." he said quietly.

"What does that mean?" He watched her and grinned again.

"Ask me again in a few months." he whispered back to her, pressing another kiss to her forehead, making her feel all warm and fuzzy. Slowly, he held up his hand and she reached out her own hand to press against his - she giggled.

"Your hand is so big, Rosie, God," she said with a laugh, hearing his chuckle from somewhere above her, "mine is so tiny."

"It's cute." he whispered quietly, clasping his fingers around her hand, holding it there against his chest.

Staring at their intertwined hands against his chest, an aggressive feeling for him suddenly took shape and she realized how quick it was that it was in fact the feeling of genuine love.

Affection.

Adoration.

Love. For someone like him. For every part of him in every way.

Judy looked up at him, meeting his gaze again there in the lantern light and couldn't help it as she leaned towards him and lovingly pressed a kiss to his lips that slowly got deepened and rather emotional and slow and infused with a tenderness that she'd never felt before. It was slow movements, their heads and lips moving in unison, breaking every so often for a collection of air, before connecting again, their noses brushing, bits of laughter escaping every so often. Judy couldn't help but laugh at how ticklish his mustache was against her upper lip. It was all so gentle and peaceful - she had never felt so at peace with someone like this.

"If one of the girls came in now…."Judy whispered, before breaking into a laugh, "I'd probably never live it down." Rosie let out a small chuckle and shook his head against her softly, before pressing another kiss to her lips.

"You're something else, Judy Rybinski," he said quietly, eyes meeting hers again and she couldn't help but swell with emotion, "ever since I met you. Something special."