#everyone needs reassurance sometimes

[hella1975]

hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x

[roblogging]

I'd love to hear your headcanons about Peter, specifically his friendships with the other 3 marauders on like an individual basis?

hi hello :3 pete is my guy fr (ask game)

okay so the marauder he's closest to? remus (i've been having a lot of thoughts about romantic moontail today but that's another post i fear). remus is the one he can be quiet with, he can just sit back with, they understand each other. remus helps pete out with school work and lets pete help him with herbology even if he doesn't need it, pete is a shorts and shirt guy through and through but he starts taking remus' cardigans and remus is 100% okay with this. it's just,,, comfortable. they can get into debates, they can be quiet and chill together, pete is the one collecting remus' classwork after moons and it's after the prank where they realllyyyyy become friends yk? that solidifies it for them

sirius and peter !? underrated friendship. i dislike the sirius hates peter trope. sirius goes to pete vefore a quidditch match and asks for the rundown on stats, what he thinks is their best plan of action etc etc. peter buys sirius fun laces for his docs, sirius introduces peter to new music. sirius doesn't "show off" as much with pete and he does with james and yk what? sirius is the only one who can hold his ground with peter at chess. they have a very practiced??? is that the word??? friendship. very strategic and teamly, until they aren't and all that quidditch, prank, and chess strategy comes in handy at The End.

james and pete,,, a bit dicier. unrequited prongstail is canon to me (and yk what i love requited too) but pete and james' friendship gets a lot more disjointed as the years go on and peter starts to realise how he feels. james doesn't notice, remus does though. pete and james were joined at the hip as kids and did everything together and then,,, well it's the same. just plagued by the fact peter knows that this is all it will be. it's a lovely, familiar friendship but it hurts that that's all it is

overarching hc: pete's love language is food but not in the way everyone always makes it. it's pete sending effie a letter in first year asking for her to send over some of her recipes for him to sneak into the kitchens and make for james (he's been feeling homesick and peter wants to help out). he uses his herbology knowledge for remus. remus hates potions, hates the taste, hates the necessity, hates the fact he has to chug them down so often so pete uses his herbology knowledge to infuse chocolate!! he finds what works best and he makes them something thats still so remus, but helps him out at the same time. and for sirius? pete teaches sirius that family meals are so different to what he knows. he puts his elbows on the table and invites sirius to do the same, he introduces sirius to finger foods and made him his first sandwich, he is adamant that the marauders sit and eat together for at least one meal a day and they fill with it with laughter and jokes and crumb-dusted fingertips that are nothing like grimmauld place. pete's mum always makes the best food and pete strives to share that comfort with the boys and being them into his lil family.

[ahollowgrave]

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thank you to everyone who left a nice comment or DM'd me or whatever yesterday I didn't reply because I get very embarrassed when people show me compassion when I very clearly need it. But I read each one and saved them for next time and I am blowing you kisses and avoiding eye contact, you understand. depression is a known liar and you can't trust her. she is very convincing, however, and so when it gets to you please know I am there holding your hand.

[khaire-traveler]

People will come and go in life, and although it can be painful initially, it's usually for the best. That's a bit of a cliché thing to say, I suppose, but truly, we are just not meant to click or grow with everyone we meet.

Sometimes we outgrow people and realize that we are on completely different levels of maturity. Sometimes people are revealed to be different than we originally thought, and we realize that they aren't the type of person we want to keep around anymore. Sometimes we simply drift apart and realize that it's time to let go of a connection that is no longer there. Sometimes we have a dramatic falling out and realize that we can't stay in such stressful situations. Sometimes people don't click with us anymore, and we realize that we've become very different people with very different interests, thoughts, and opinions. Sometimes we don't even know we've lost a connection and realize that it happened after the fact, and we wait for answers from these people that will never come.

Whatever the reason, you will be ok without these people, in the end.

You will lead a happy and fulfilling life without them. You will form strong and mutual relationships without them. You will accomplish things that you never thought possible without them. You will move on and walk into a better, brighter future without them.

The only person you need in order to be happy is yourself.

[halfbit]

i want to wait till i finish up all of the first three comms and post them together so full pictures will have to wait but! i am very proud of these wings so sharing a little peekaboo :>

^ mr-orion's ray

also i thought this character suited a rougher feel so i'm going wild with the manual hatching for the hair

this one isnt a comm its a sketch of solei </3 i like the hair but i want to redo the face so its Very cropped but yeah. im trying to draw my characters with the same energy i give comms more so that i have nicer art to show of them thats not just sketches but it is HARD when you arent in the habit of it

ive also got some more monster practice sketches and doodles to share but ill confine those to their own post later aaa

[avinox]

Thinking about the comment one of the members of my college friend group said a few years ago about how I'm always trying to explain and get to the root of things, and I immediately tried to discern why I do that because I never noticed, and she said "See?"

It kinda felt shameful to me, to be exposed like that. Idk I still feel bad when I remember cause it's like she noticed my patterns and I'm weird and if she noticed then so did everyone else.

[batterys-oc-blog]

the current situation looks pretty stressful. sorry that it all got outta hand. i know you didn’t mean to stir anything up. it’ll die down eventually. i just wanted to say i hope it doesn’t get to you or anything. you seem like a cool person. i hope you have a nice day

this is so nice??? who are you????

[thnksfrthmmrs]

[luminyan]

I refuse to put this in the tags of someone else's post but that post about feeling bad over everything felt like the fkin. "im in this picture and i dont like it"

fighting every day to try and get over a lot of weird inherent guilt and discomfort i feel over Literally Everything. Like. I don't need to!! I don't think I should feel discomfort or shame for Speaking but hooooly shit any time I wanna talk (esp in group settings) I immediately feel like I'm gonna talk over someone or that its not worth it to talk. Or like I'm challenging someone or being contrarian. It drives me sort of crazy

idk why i have social anxiety but Only When Talking Online . i dont have these issues NEARLY as bad when talking to people irl i dont GET IT

i dont wanna be anxious abt talking to my friends man ;;

[gemkun]

hi good morning @defiedlife sent me a thread about veritas ratio being the last of his kind ( similar to aventurine ) and now i will just go insane actually

[puppetlooselystrung]

its so crazy how someone will go "hey its pretty weird to say you hate kids with your whole chest. you should respect them because theyre young and dont know better most of the time unlike you who have had the years of experience to figure things out unlike them" and a flock of people will bend over backwards to go "no its okay and understandable if you dont like or hate kids for xyz" "actually i hate kids why do you hate me you catholic" " i understand why people hate kids but you should still respect them" "oh actually because of you im disrespecting children out of spite now you catholic sounding fuckwad" as a response.

[vriendenboekjes]

AITAs that are like "aita because im mad at somebody" are so irrelevant. no i dont think youre the asshole for having an emotion. it's what you do with it that determines if YTA

[lightxsheep71]

man. if nothing else, freaks like this make me beyond grateful to have irl friends that i regularly hang out with. i think if i was doomed to spend the rest of my days only talking to people who learned all their social skills from tumblr i would actually go insane

[sn0wwangeel]

all this repeated trauma over the years has caused me to become a shell of myself. i don’t know how to comfort people anymore. i don’t know how to talk anymore. i can’t form a coherent sentence without crying. i feel so bad cause all i can say is “real” or “i hear that” and i so badly wish i had the words but i don’t, and i don’t have the energy anymore either to say more than one word. i’m so fucking worn out but i care so much i care so much i promise i care so fucking much please

[palebluelight]

never realised this before but wowwwwww am i bad at expressing myself

[loverboybrightsideghost]

is it just me or is going to music school like [unlearns technique] [relearns technique] [unlearns technique] [relearns technique] [unlearns technique] [relearns technique][unlearns technique] [relearns technique][unlearns technique] [re-