#everyone else has left. it’s only me here now with the ghosts of what once was. but I will do my best to keep it neat and clean.

[the-golden-comet]

✨💋Friday Kiss Tag✨💋

✨🎉🎊 Iiiiiiiiiit’s FRIDAY 🎊🎉✨

You know what that means. Smoochin’ (or share) Time! 💋💖

Some extra kudos and love to the following individuals who tagged me this week:

@kaylinalexanderbooks for a heads up seven up tag, @illarian-rambling for an OC deep dive, both @justabigoldnerd and @pippinoftheshire for both WIP Wednesday and Playlist Shuffle tags, @gioiaalbanoart for an open Mixed Fried tag, @ominous-feychild for a silent Saturday tag, @the-inkwell-variable for a Proud Of and Last Line tag, @willtheweaver for a Proud Of Tag, @sableglass , @words-after-midnight , and @tragedycoded for a Pride of Line tag, @noblebs and @illarian-rambling for Find The Word tags, @drchenquill , @tragedycoded , @ceph-the-ghost-writer , @cowboybrunch , and @theink-stainedfolk for a Writing Share Tag! ANNNND the Friday Kiss Tags from @leahnardo-da-veggie and @illarian-rambling !!Wow!! That deserves another smoochin’ gif! Thank you all!!

For everyone else who has tagged me who I may have missed, thank you so much and I always appreciate your tags!! As I wrap up Draft 2 of YWIMC, I will be very busy getting technical editing done and preparing the story for launch, so in the meanwhile I may miss some tags. Please always feel free to tag me, even if I miss them! I love seeing what the community is doing, even if I’ve been a little quieter than usual 💫✨

Now, onto the tag! 💛

Here are the kiss rules 💋✨:

Rules: From your Story/WIP, share a kiss. It can be any kiss, from familial pecks on the cheek, forehead kisses, platonic smooches, to full-blown makeouts.

And if you don’t have a kiss, no worries! You can still participate by treating this post as a writing share! 💚

Rules: Share a snippet of your writing!

I will attempt to fit as many tags this week as possible in this post as I give you this heartbreaking excerpt from YWIMC:

For the music tag, take some Christina Perri’s “Jar of Hearts” to set the stage:

And now, without ANY dialogue, get ready for a gutwrenching scene where Ali and Noah are fighting. I’m putting it underneath the cut because there is a ⚠️ trigger warning for domestic violence. ⚠️ Use discretion.

✨👇Tag list for writing snippets below. DM me if you’d like to be added 👇✨

In one last act of desperation, Noah started to scream. He screamed in pain, anger, sorrow, stress. He screamed a guttural scream that instinctively made Ali flinch and his gut turn. The djinn slapped a hand to Noah’s mouth to muffle the agony as Cauldwell tried pulling his head away, only briefly stopping his distressed cries to jolt out of Ali’s attempt to silence him. And in another attempt to stop the visceral screams, the genie wrapped his arms tightly around his master, and held Noah’s head to the frantic pulse in Ali’s neck.

In his fight or flight, Noah beat closed fists on Ali’s shoulder blades. Frustration, desperation, culminating sorrow bubbled out of his chest as he wailed into Ali’s neck, and onto Ali’s back. Cauldwell’s attempts at kicking were stopped by the genie’s knees pinning his legs down, and in the heat of the struggle Noah’s lenses slid off his face and clattered on the floor….the left lens cracking and the right one remaining whole.

Ali grit his teeth and bore the strikes, yet refused to let go. He held the back of Noah’s head, the face to his nape, and weathered the flagellation. Weaker and weaker the strikes rained, but the tempest would not stop the flood from Noah’s olive eyes. Anger and frustration gave way to despair, until finally Cauldwell crumbled.

Furious, hot screams turned into icy cries and frigid tears. The furious fists flexed their fingers to tightly clench the back of Ali’s collar. Noah’s arms, once trying to push away, pulled around Ali’s neck to bring him closer. The anger stinging Ali’s corneas simmered away as his face softened, washing cold sadness over his somber face.

Ali and Noah naturally slid to sit on the cool vinyl floor as the genie kept his master locked to his chest. Resting at the foot of the couch, Ali let a silent prayer parse his lips, pressing the plump skin to the top of Noah’s head as his eyebrows furrowed in deep contemplation.

Tag List for writing tidbits (lmk if you want + or -)

@autism-purgatory , @talesofsorrowandofruin , @ragin-cajun-fangirl , @wyked-ao3 ,

@glasshouses-and-stones , @alinacapellabooks , @gioiaalbanoart , @tragedycoded , @deanwax ,

@dyrewrites , @honeybewrites , @drchenquill , @paeliae-occasionally , @lychhiker-writes ,

@thatuselesshuman , @kaylinalexanderbooks , @phynewrites , @zackprincebooks , @fantasy-things-and-such ,

@finickyfelix , @billybatsonmylove , @madi-konrad , @houseplantblank , @far-cry-from-finality ,

@froggy-pposto , @fractured-shield , @avaseofpeonies , @topazadine , @thecoolerlucky ,

@theaistired , @somethingclevermahogony , @noxxytocin , @the-inkwell-variable , @seastarblue ,

@leahnardo-da-veggie , @addicted2coke-theothercoke , @illarian-rambling , @mysticstarlightduck , @the-letterbox-archives ,

@ominous-feychild , @saturnine-saturneight , @words-after-midnight , @hemlocks-grove , @cowboybrunch ,

@yourpenpaldee , @moltenwrites , @pixies-love-envy , @davycoquette , @writeahurricane ,

@nczaversnick , @greenfinchwriter , @oliolioxenfreewrites , @lavender-gloom , @smellyrottentrees ,

@aintgonnatakethis , @thecomfywriter , @pluppsauthor , @michellekarnold , @flurrysahin ,

@authorcoledipalo , @jadeglas , @spookyceph , @astramachina , @48lexr ,

@inseasofgreen , @agirlandherquill , @saebasanart , @leatafandom , @justabigoldnerd ,

@pippinoftheshire , @just-emis-blog, @aalinaaaaa , @badscientist , @dearunreliablenarrator ,

@worlds-tallest-fairy , @rhikasa , @eccaiia , @theink-stainedfolk , @theverumproject ,

@theprissythumbelina , @riveriafalll , @revenancy , @inadequatecowboy , @amielbjacobs ,

@patternwelded-quill , @sugarchains , @garthcelyn , @prettytothink-so , @leahnardo-pa-potato ,

@winvyre , @speaknowbuckley , @lamuradex , @wintherlywords , @sharkblizzardblogs ,

@dragoninatrenchcoat , @darekasama , @recklessgirl56 , @kokoass , @ziote ,

@paletteofseaglass , @basketcase1880 , @sableglass , @halfbakedspuds , @notwritinganyflufftoday ,

@twopercentboy , @mxtansy , @menaceofmemory , @unfilteredmoonchild , @blerdsong ,

@iamwhimsy , @beansmakesthings , @birdycage , @tiagems , @narkaholic ,

@irolynn , @petitprincess1 , @macinchiz , @owlsandwich , @stephtuckerauthor,

@sarandipitywrites , @mauvecatfic , @finchwrites , @aurumni-writes , @uiraya ,

@justanotherchangeling , @ahopelessnecromantic , @ryns-ramblings , @oleanderbailey , @365runesofthesystem

[tamagotchikgs]

i smacked my stomach in frustration & it reverberated so loud my cats fucking SC ATT E R ED ,,,,,,,,,,,,, i am but a gong. , ,,

[revengeraven]

Thinking about it again. I was right. No one else cares but I was right. Everyone who was wrong owes me 20 bucks and a coffee.

[oceantornadoo]

IDK! HEAR ME OUT THO!!!

Simon, staging the break in and what not so he could push you back into his arms??? INSANE!

Delicious story. Thank you for the food! <3

so originally when i made that last fic (which unexpectedly blew up tysm everyone) i added in the creepy elements almost on accident?? but this and another reply has me thinking...

tw: slight humiliation (but you'll like it)=

simon riley wasn't a bad man. he also wasn't a bad husband. at least that's what he told himself.

when you had presented him with those divorce papers a bit ago (13 months and 4 days, but who was counting), he thought it was a bluff. a joke. he had gone too far in your last argument, and that was your reaction. when he told you he'd go to therapy, you stared at him with a look he'd only see on men in the battlefield. dead all the way through, a walking husk. so he signed them and went to therapy anyways.

the whole time, this whole 13-month break, where you had been 'building a new life' or whatever, he had been planning. internalizing the commentary his therapist would make, and then spitting it back out to you while you moved out of his place. every time you seemed to forget one extra box, and who's to say if he hid a couple in his room? he had a plan.

over time, simon really seemed to have learned so much from therapy. so much about communication. he had become open and welcoming, far from that man who would respond to your complaints with hard stares and a lack of words. so maybe you met for coffee a couple of times and that's how he knew about the cafe by your new place. maybe that's how he tailed you one night after a date, just to make sure this new guy didn't try anything (and not to figure out your unit number). whatever he did, he played a dangerous game by letting you have this illusion of freedom while balancing his presence in your life, just enough to make you want more. after weeks and week of stagnant progress, he needed one extra push. something small, not even a shove.

and if he happened to mention your unit number to a bunch of shady guys that hung out in the alley by your building? happened to brag about your pretty pussy and sweet-smelling panties? maybe mention your habit of not locking the window when you left for work? who's to say. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

and now here you were, back in his arms where you belonged. a little frightened but comforted in the knowledge that he could protect you. the ghost wasn't shed when he took his mask off, but you didn't need to know that.

--

your body was so used to being in simon's arms you didn't even realize you had been grinding on him for the past ten minutes. his boxers you wore were sticky with arousal as you grinded against his clothed cock in the dark. even in your dream, it was simon underneath you, no one else. "si." you panted, a near-whisper that only a military man could have heard. "dove?" he adjusted your sleeping positions, tossing the covers to give you more room to maneuver against him.

"i know i said that thing about the line not being crossed." he gave you a low chuckle. silly little girl. you had finally realized how much you needed him and he was going to milk you for all you were worth. "and?" you stopped. shit. he needed to seem more responsive. he moved you from his thigh to his boner using one arm, the other one snaking its way under your shirt to stroke your back. you moaned as he massaged the tension from the day's earlier events away, giving you sweet relief. the sweetness of the massage made a hard contrast to the friction in your core as he rubbed you against his hardened cock.

"spit it out, baby." he growled. "can you-fuck." his hand had moved to the back of your neck now, holding it in a tight grip. his hand was so large he could feel the pulse points on either side of your jaw, heart racing. finally. "can you get me off? just this once?" he snorted, moving you up and down against him faster, dragging your sensitive clit over and over. "what's the magic word?" he flipped you both around, pressing his body weight on top of you.

simon turned the light on, wanting to see how needy you were. you were panting, shirt sticky with sweat as your chest moved up and down with exertion. he hiked up your shirt and took off your boxers, exposing your sticky cunt to the cool air. he took a sniff of the fabric, noting your small gasp as if you didn't know how obsessed he was with you already. "magic word." your mouth dropped. guess you weren't getting off that easily. "please, simon." he clucked his tongue at that. "ghost?" he left out a short laugh, arms reaching out to tug his shirt off of you. your nipples were so hard, aching to be pinched and sucked just how you liked them. "not ghost." he reached over to his nightstand, pulling something out of the drawer. he fumbled with his hand for a second, then held yours up to the light as he slipped something on it.

"husband." the words left your mouth in a whoosh, eyes transfixed on your wedding ring that was on your hand. the one you had flung at him after he complained about the divorce papers, the one you said you'd rather die than wear again. and here it was, right back on your finger, sparkling in the lamplight.

simon captured your mouth in a rough kiss, entering you with his ring and middle finger at the same time. "so willing for your husband, hm? all puffy and wet. look at your cunt, darling." you both looked down at your pussy at the same time. it was squelching, your vibrator sessions not holding a candle to what your ex husband could do to you. you were almost embarrassed by how desperate your pussy looked, clit enlarged from its earlier friction. his fingers worked in and out of you, wedding ring covered in slick. you watched as he pressed his thumb to your clit in small circles, a tightening sensation in your lower belly rising to the surface. "simon, si-fuck" he gave your pussy a small slap, pulling his fingers out as you addressed him incorrectly. "husband, please." he entered you again roughly, drawing a low moan from you. he captured your nipple in his mouth, teething it just enough to make you hurt. punishment.

"please please please i'm right ther-" he pressed hard against your clit and sent you careening off the edge into your orgasm, back bowing off the bed. simon gave you small love bites as you recovered, hand still working your cunt to draw out your orgasm.

finally, he removed his fingers and drew back from you, forcing eye contact. he put both in his mouth, moaning at the taste of your arousal mixed with the metal from the wedding band. your jaw was still open, looking at him like you had never seen him before. like the sheep's skin had finally been removed, and now only the wolf remained.

"let's get you to bed, wife."

[kettlefire]

Booo-merang Trouble DP x DC Idea

Okay but leeching off the idea that Jason gives off an ecto-signature, and I probably saw a post about this somewhere. I just for the love of me can't find it. If anyone knows it, please link it so I can credit!:

Jason isn't even on patrol, he's visiting the manor. His chilling, eating away at lunch. He doesn't come to the manor often, but he always needs a dose of his crazy family every once in a while. There's no way he'd stay away from Alred's cookies for long.

Then boom, something shatters the window behind him. On instinct, Jason moves. Taking cover and trying to get a sight of the situation. Of the perceived attack. However, before Jason could do much a heavy object rams into his chest before landing on the ground before him. It doesn't really hurt, nothing compared to his prior injuries.

A boomerang. A glowing green and silver boomerang laid on the ground before him. Jason's a million and one ways confused as he stared at the device. His hands carefully picking it up, and looking over the softly beeping device.

Jason thinks maybe it's a bomb, but something in his gut says otherwise. He can think of a million different things it could be. Maybe one of the rogues got a hold of their DNA, and it tracked them. Maybe it's going to expel a gas any moment, an attack on the Waynes rather than their vigilante personas.

Except it's none of that. The beeping stops and suddenly a robotic voice sounds from the boomerang.

"Ghost located, prepare for your end ghoul."

Jason tenses once again at the clear threat in those words. His gaze scans around the kitchen, still crouched behind the kitchen counter. Except nothing happens.

Except for a voice ringing out from the boomerang once again. This time, this time it's not a robot. It's a clear record of a young woman speaking. Her voice filled with fear, concern, and urgency.

"Okay, this should work right? You know what, that doesn't matter. No one but you should have a signature. Beside's Tucker thinks he set this up to go to you only. So Danny, you should be hearing this..."

Jason only finds himself more confused. The urgency in this girl's voice was enough to keep his nerves on edge. It sounded important, but Jason had no clue who these people are. Who these names could be refering to.

"Danny... Things here aren't doing to good. Look, I know why you left. You have every reason to. What mom and dad did... It's unforgivable and I don't expect you to come back. But, thing is..."

There's a lull in the recording. The distant sound of soft chatting. If Jason strained his ears, he could somewhat pick of the sound of another woman and man.

"Everyone thinks Phantom is dead. Which I would think is a good thing, but it's not. Danny, the GIW is on a rampage now that you aren't here. Mom and dad are on their side..."

Jason made the conclusion that the speaker was this Danny's sister. The message was intended for him, yet it somehow landed in Jason's lap.

"They have everyone locked up in the school... Radars to see if anyone has a signature, and if they do... They separate them from everyone else."

Jason's brows furrowed, finally pulling himself to a stand. He placed the boomerang on the kitchen counter. Leaning forward as he took in the words.

"We don't know what they are doing. Sam, Tucker, and Valerie... We're all hiding. We'll have the highest signatures, and... Listen Danny..."

Jason had a growing pit in his gut. He knew something wasn't right. These people were in danger. It didn't matter he didn't know about what, or who the GIW was, but these people needed help.

"... We need you. We need Phantom, baby bro. I'm sorry, I know you're still recovering. We can handle things here, but please. Please tell me you're still alive, you're in Gotham right? Tell me you're safe, and you're healing and still kicking Danny."

Jason swallowed, placing his hands flat on the kitchen counter. He needed to get this down to the cave. Have the computer tracked where it came from. But Jason couldn't move, not at the sound of pure desperation in this woman's voice.

"I just need to know you at least made it out of this nightmare. I don't care how you do it, just please let me know things are okay... They have... They have Vlad, Danny. Things are complicated, and I hate to put this on you... But Amity needs Phantom..."

The recorded suddenly broke into static, but Jason thinks he got enough of what he needed. Amity. The place these people were was called Amity. It gave him a lead, something for them to work with.

"Da... We... Help... They..."

Jason could hear the woman's voice breaking through the static. He gripped the boomerang, turning on his heels and heading towards the cave.

"Sam... Mom... Tech... I..."

Every broken word only fueled Jason's own urgency. Jason felt a strange urge, a connection. Something that told him he had to help. They needed to help. The boomerang found him, and that had to mean something.

"... I love you, Danny..."

Those four words were the clearest compared to rhe rest of it. It made Jason's heart seize, and he took a breath. He was going to help.

It didn't matter if Jason didn't know these people. If they weren't from Gotham. This was important, and something told Jason he needed to find this Danny.

Danny would be the only one that would know that to do. If Jason manages to rewind the recording, he was certain Bruce would be equally on board.

That voice, the emotions that dripped from it. It gave the sense that this wasn't just life or death. This was a world ending problem.

And Jason would be damned if he ignored it.

[rinneverse]

cw just a crumb suggestive. minors do not interact. happy aventurine release day!! hope everyone who wants him gets him in their first 10 pull :>

aventurine likes to think his jealousy is subtle.

but really, after knowing him for so long, there are tiny slips in his facade, minuscule cracks in the mask that clue you into how he’s truly feeling.

they’re not easy to spot. his character is carefully crafted to be as flawless as possible; he’s a phenomenal actor and he doesn’t like to expose his true nature.

but you know him—you know him in ways no one else has seen before. you’ve seen him come unraveled, breathless and slick with sweat. you’ve seen him on his knees for you, eyes glimmering with want as he worships you. you’ve seen the way his nose scrunches slightly when he laughs, the way his eyebrows pinch together when he’s deep in thought, the way his left hand is always tucked behind his back during a gamble.

“you so were jealous,” you jab at your boyfriend, coy smile dancing on your lips as he scoffs and turns away.

“was not. i can only listen to that angel prattle on for so long, you know.”

“no need to deny it, vennie.”

the gambler turns your way. he gives you a brief once over before approaching you. he pushes into your space, forcing you to step back until your back hits the wall. he crowds you there, arm coming up to rest on the wall above your head. you’ve effectively been trapped.

"i'm not denying anythin' baby," aventurine huffs, bringing his face to yours. his warm breath ghosts against your lips. you find yourself wanting to tilt your head towards him, to brush your lips against his.

you resist yourself. you know exactly what he's gunning for here.

(you know you won't last very long. he'll always get what he wants in the end. you don't mind one bit.)

"i could literally see you glowering at him. you're not too subtle, you know?" at least not to you. not when you've come to know him in such intimate ways.

"i was bored—and hey, let's talk about the way he was lookin' at you. i didn't appreciate it one bit. that's what has me so worked up, since you're so convinced i'm jealous."

"he was just having a conversation with me??"

aventurine gives you an incredulous look, bringing his free hand up to squish your cheeks. you let out an indignant squeak.

"that's not how i saw it, sweetheart. c'mon, indulge me here. if i were him, i'd be lookin' at a pretty thing like you the way he was too. but doing that right in front of me? ugh," he sighs dramatically. "how're you gonna make it up to me? you were givin' all of your attention to him and i just don't think that's fair."

"when do you ever play fair?"

"i am right now, aren't i?"

you shoot him a look that screams absolutely not. but you sigh anyways, bringing your arms up to loop around his neck. the hand that holds your face loosens, then slowly trails down your body, coming to rest on your hip.

with a coy smile, you let your lips brush against his, feather-light and fleeting.

"fine, fine. i'll make it up to you. my eyes are only on you tonight, 'kay?"

aventurine smiles, dark and full of sinful promise.

"good. i think i'll take my time with you."

[heizlut]

Promises To Keep

⟡ cw: none

⟡ tags: fem!reader, zayne, angst⇢comfort⇢smut, vague allusions to chapter 4 so slight spoiler warning?

⟡ 4.9k words (officially my longest fic!)

⟡ co-written with da bf @knihil everyone say thank you knihil!🖤

⟡ nsfw under the cut

⟡ m!list here

Zayne stood at his office window, looking out into the night. He was haunted by the memory of your grandma telling him to take care of you always; that it would do both of you some good. He lets out a sigh and runs his fingers through his dark hair, feeling frustrated at himself. Zayne has known you since you were young and he always held you close in his heart.

He wanted to run to you and hold you in his arms. To comfort you and see you smile again, but after what happened, you had told him you needed time to yourself and left without another word.

The nights seemed even longer to you as you wrestled with your grieving; your cries and sobs accompanying your solitary mourning. Your tears spilt from your eyes, falling on your blanket like the rain against your bedroom window. Everything feels so cold…

It had been too long since you'd last seen Zayne. It wasn’t always easy to find time to spend together with both your busy schedules, but even more so now that you refused to leave your apartment. You're the one who asked for space, the one who walked away from his open arms. You thought space was what you needed, but now you feel far more hurt than before. You grieve and you hurt, knowing you pushed away the one person who always wanted the best for you.

A knock on your door startles you from your sorrowful stupor. You sniffle and wipe your tears with the sleeve of your sweatshirt as you get up and make your way to the door. The knock sounds again, “I know you’re in there. Please… Just open the door.” Your chest tightens when you hear Zayne’s voice. His typically unemotional tone sounds like a holy choir to you, answering your subconscious pleas for his presence.

You crack open the door and look up at him, his hazel eyes meeting yours immediately. There’s a flash of uncharacteristic worry in Zayne’s eyes as he sees your tear-stained cheeks and he sighs, “Can you let me in?” You frown but nod, opening the door a little more so that he could step inside. You shut the door once he's inside and sit on your couch, holding your knees to your chest.

Zayne sits down beside you, leaving a little space between the two of you. You eyes are cast down to the floor as you sit silently and he looks at you, "Have you been taking care of yourself?" The way you pull your knees closer to your chest is all the answer he needs. Zayne lets out a deep breath, "Have you at least eaten today?" Your eyes finally meet his and you simply shake your head. He purses his lips and stands up, "I'll make you something then."

Your gaze trails after him and he heads to your kitchen. Zayne frowns when he opens your fridge to find only a few breakfast ingredients and nothing else. He pulls out the eggs and sausage and silently begins to prepare you a meal.

Sizzles and pops from the breakfast cooking in the pan are the only sounds in the apartment. Zayne finally breaks the silence, adjusting the ingredients in the pan with a spatula, "I know things have been hard lately, but you need to take care of-"

He's caught off guard by the feeling of your arms wrapped around his torso and your body pressed against his from behind, "What're you doing?" You hold him tighter and press your cheek against his back before speaking softly, voice weak and shaky from all the crying you had done earlier, "Thank you..." Zayne's body relaxes and he carefully plates your meal, struggling only slightly as you wouldn't let him go.

A ghost of a smile plays on his lips when he speaks again, "Come on. Let me go... You need to eat." You frown and bury your face into his back. Zayne breathes out a small laugh as he turns in your arms, facing you now. You frown up at him and he can't help but think how cute you look. He smooths down your hair, "I'll stay the night and let you hold me as long as you want, but only if you eat first."

You reluctantly let go and he smiles softly down at you, "There you go." Zayne holds the plate of breakfast food out to you, "Go on and eat now. Doctors orders." Your emotional demeanor cracks just a little at his half-playful words and you take the plate from him, "Fine, I'll eat." You sit yourself down at your table and take a small bite of the sausage and eggs. Your eyes close as you take in the flavor. It wasn't anything special, but it was the first meal you had eaten in a couple days.

Zayne sits across from you, watching as you finished off the rest of the food rather quickly, "It seems that this was definitely necessary..." His eyes soften, "I'm glad I stopped by." One corner of your lips curls into a hint of a smile and you nod, "...Me too." You move to take your dish to the sink but Zayne stops you, his voice low and serious, "Let me take care of you." Your heart flutters and you can only gawk at him as he takes the plate from you and puts it in the sink.

Turning back to face you, Zayne gives you an expectant look, "Well? What would you like now?" You play with the sleeves of your sweatshirt and you look up at him, speaking softly, "Can we just lay down and... talk?" He studies you as you speak, watching the way your sleeves partially cover your hands as your fingers pick at the hems, "Yes. I promised I would stay here if you ate and you did." He would've stayed whether you ate the food or not. All he cared about was making you happy again…

Zayne follows you to your bedroom, taking in the clothes that are scattered across your floor and your bed half-made, "Maybe I should try to stay for the weekend and help you clean up..." Your cheeks flush in embarrassment and you look away from him. "Don't be embarrassed", Zayne's deep voice brings your attention back to him, "I'm here to help. I always have been." You huff, "Yeah, as my doctor.." He gives you a disappointed look and takes you hand in his, "It's more than that. Don't act as though that's all we are to each other."

You frown as you eyes meet his hazel ones and you mutter, "Sorry..." He sits on your bed and pulls you to him, "Come here." You sit down next to him and look down at your hand in his. With his free hand, Zayne redirects your gaze back to him with his fingers against your jaw, "Look at me." He searches your eyes when you finally listen, "You mean more to me than I can properly express..." Zayne reaches forward and runs his fingers through your hair, "I made a promise to someone and I intend to keep it."

You absentmindedly lick your lips as your eyes trail down to his lips. Zayne takes notices and leans his face a little closer to yours and speaks in a hushed voice, "May I?" Your shining lips part as you nod, allowing him to move forward. His lips meet yours in the most gentle kiss, lingering on yours for a moment before he moves back; his thumb rubbing across your cheek, "It pains me to know that you've been keeping yourself here, stuck in your own grief..." You lean into his touch and take a deep breath, "I just need time, Zayne..."

He presses a kiss to your forehead, "I know. But I won't allow you to do this on your own anymore." Your heart swells. Zayne isn't usually one to outwardly express his emotions, but things were different now. He just wanted you to be happy again. He pulls you in for a tight embrace; muscular arms keeping you pressed against him. You relax in his arms, your head nuzzled into the crook of his neck and you breathe in his scent.

Zayne smooths your hair down lovingly and kisses the top on your head, "How about I prepare a bath for you? I want you to be able to relax." You think for a moment then nod, "Okay... I think that would be nice..." You raise your head to look up at him, "Thank you.." He gives you a subtle smile and releases you from his embrace, "Of course."

The sound of running water is soothing as the tub fills up, steam billowing over the edge and swirling around the bathroom. Zayne rummages through your bathroom cabinets, in search of anything that could make the bath more soothing for you. Finding what he was looking for, he straightens up, holding a bag of lavender bath salts and a scented candle. The handle squeaks when he turns off the water and little droplets drip from the spout.

You walk in as Zayne is putting in a scoop of the bath salts and you watch the little crystal-like grains float to the bottom. He speaks without looking at you as he closes the bag and set it on the counter, "The bath salts will help your muscles relax and soothe any other aching you may be experiencing." One corner of your lips twitch in slight amusement with the way he could go from being a loving boyfriend to your primary care physician.

Zayne continues on as he lights the vanilla scented candle for you, the warm glow reflecting on his face, "The scent of vanilla will help relax your mind, as well as reduce your heart rate and blood pressure." He finally looks to you with a raised eyebrow when he hears the softest laughter come from you, "Did I say something to amuse you?" He can hardly act stern when he finally sees the small smile that plays on your lips; the corners of his turn upwards, "Nevermind. It's good to see you smile again..."

You shift your weight on your feet as you feel the butterflies in your stomach, trying to allow yourself to feel happy amidst everything that has happened. It felt wrong and your smile slips. Zayne takes notice and looks concerned as he approaches you. He softly grips your chin and tilts your head up to his, "You are allowed to feel happiness. Do not try to convince yourself otherwise." You release a breath as you take in his words, "You're right... I'm sorry." He purses his lips, "Don't apologize." Zayne releases his grip only to caress your cheek, "Come on. I don't want the water to cool."

You nod and reach for the hem of your sweatshirt and Zayne looks away, stepping around you to leave the bathroom and give you privacy, but you catch his wrist, "Stay." He searches your features as if he was making sure you really wanted that. You look sincere and you speak softly, "Now that you're here, I... Don't want to be left alone anymore." Zayne's relaxes and nods once, "Then I'll stay."

With his answer, you let go of his wrist and lift your sweatshirt over your head, letting it drop to the tiled floor beneath you. Your breasts lift and fall with your motion, and Zayne swallows hard. You turn around and bend over slightly as you slip your sleep shorts and panties down your legs. He reflexively averts his gaze even though he had seen you bare before, underneath him and sharing heavy breaths.

You step into the tub of steaming water, the tension visibly leaving your body as you settle in. Zayne finally steals a glance at you, hazel eyes wandering from your relaxed face to the way the water rippled around your breasts to the rhythm of your slow breathing. You crack open one eye and peek at him, chuckling softly to yourself when you catch where his gaze is. The soft sound of your laughter snaps him out of it and he looks away, clearing his throat, "I apologize. I shouldn't-"

You shush him, opening your eyes fully now, "Now you're the one apologizing. It's not necessary." He chews at the inside of his cheek and frowns, "I know, but... Still. You're still in the grieving process and here I am being... inappropriate." This pulls a full laugh from you and you sit up a little straighter; the warm water sloshing from the disturbance; breasts now resting on top of the water.

The sound of your laughter and the better view of your breasts sends tingles straight to his heart and down to the bulge he was beginning to sport under his slacks. Zayne huffs and pinches the bridge of his nose, "There you go laughing again when I'm trying to be serious..." Your laughter dies down and you smile softly, extending your hand towards him, "Come here..." He looks down at your hand and then back to your face as he ponders your request.

With a heavy sigh, he comes to you, kneeling down by the side of the tub, "What do you need?" You keep your hand open, palm facing upwards and give him a small pout. Zayne now knows exactly what you're asking for. He looks a bit annoyed, but truthfully he didn't mind doing this for you whenever you requested. He rests his jaw in your palm and his hazel eyes meet yours, "Are you happy now?"

You nod with a little smile as he gives a ghost of his own and leans back again, "I think you've been in there long enough. If you stay much longer, you'll dehydrate." Without waiting for a response from you, Zayne stands back up and grabs your towel from the hook and holds it open for you. You let out a breath as you carefully rise up, not wanting to slip. Zayne wraps the towel around your body and without warning, swoops you up bridal style, making you gasp, "Zayne!"

He looks down at you with a confused expression as if what he did was a perfectly normal thing to do, "What?" You pout as he holds you closer, taking you back to the bedroom, "A little warning would've been nice..." Zayne ignores your comment and lowers your legs first to let you stand on your own. You adjust the towel around your body, turning your back to him, and go to grab a fresh set of pajamas. Zayne watches you closely as you move; his cock stirring in his slacks once again.

As soon as your towel drops to the ground, he's fighting the urge to to take you where you stand. You slip on one of his oversized sweatshirts that you had stolen borrowed from him and then turn to face him. He puts on a disapproving face, even though on the inside Zayne felt his heart skip, "My sweatshirt... You do realize I have been looking everywhere for that one right?" You crack a sheepish grin, "Oops?" Zayne huffs out a breath, "It's fine." Then he mutters, "It looks better on you anyways..."

You smile a little at his comment and sit on the bed, "You know.. You still have some clothes here. If you're going to stay you should change too. I washed them for you." Zayne raises a brow at that, about to make a teasing remark about you being able to wash his clothes but not the ones scattered across your floor, but he holds his tongue. Now was not the right moment to make a comment about that now that he had you feeling a bit better.

Instead he nods and and turns to find his clothes folded neatly on top of your dresser. Grabbing a pair of sweats and a plain white t-shirt, he heads to your bathroom to change, "One moment." You watch as he closes the bathroom door behind him, still open just a crack. You can't help but peek at him as he undresses from his formal work attire, absentmindedly licking your lips as your eyes trail down his form.

He slips the clean, comfortable clothes on and comes back out to you, taking note of the slight blush of your cheeks, "Are you feeling sick?" Zayne presses the back of his hand against your forehead. You laugh softly and grab his wrist and press a kiss to his palm, "I'm not sick." The feeling of your kiss lingers on his palm once you release him, "That's good then..."

You lay back on the mattress and look up at the ceiling and then sigh, looking back to Zayne, "I thought you said you'd lay with me?" He gives a hint of a smile and lays down beside you, propping himself up with his hand as he faces you. You both stay silent for a moment, simply taking in each other's presence before Zayne is the first one to speak, "Tell me, what more can I do to make you feel better?"

You turn your body towards him, eyes trailing down from his eyes to his lips and lingering for a moment, “Just… hold me.” The slightest smile appears in his lips and he pulls you close. His hand rests on the back of your head as your face nuzzles into his chest.

Zayne presses three slow little kisses to the top of your head, breathing in your scent. “I’ve got you and I’m never going anywhere”, his voice comes out hushed with a hint of sentimentality that makes your heart swell in your chest.

You let out a small breath, pressing yourself impossibly closer against his body, wishing you could just melt into him. As his arms tighten around you, the realization that you're not the only one with an aching wish hits you.

Surprised, you unearth your face from his chest only to be met by the sensation of his lips upon yours. You detect the gentleness, the care and longing he feels for you through the kiss… And something more.

There's a hunger you can taste in his embrace, and it takes everything in you not to moan out in response. Zayne's cock twitches beneath his sweats and he lets a small groan escape from his lips against yours. The sound alone has arousal pooling between your legs and your tongue prods against his before finding a sensual rhythm.

His hands begin to wander down your body and rest on your ass as he gives it a gentle squeeze, grinding his clothed cock against you. Zayne pulls back just enough to speak huskily, "Tell me to stop and I will." All you can do is shake your head, not trusting your voice enough to form proper words in this moment.

Right now, all you wanted was to lose yourself in him, to forget everything you've been through up until this moment. All that mattered was you and Zayne and your burning need for him.

A small smirk plays on his lips and he adjusts his position, now with you underneath him. Your eyes lock onto his, your lips parted slightly in a breathless and wordless need. "You don't need to say anything, sweetheart...", Zayne starts, leaning down as he presses a soft kiss to your temple, "I told you I would take care of you and that's a promise I will always keep."

The cutest little whimper escapes your lips, making him let out a soft chuckle as his hands trail up under your sweatshirt, "It seems I have quite the effect on you..." Your back arches to met his touch and his thumbs brush over your hardened nipples. "That's it, sweetheart. Just relax and enjoy this."

You couldn't ignore the request, not that you wanted to anyways. Zayne's calloused hands felt electric against your heated skin, sending a pleasurable shiver up your spine and straight to your core. God, just this is enough to have your entrance clenching for him.

The process of grieving, cocooned in your solitude and away from Zayne almost made you forget how badly your body needed him. Almost. As if he can sense your burning need, one of his hands trails down your abdomen and rests on your thigh. His fingertips begin to lightly trace towards your soaking pussy, Zayne's off hand still molding around the swell of your breast, "Go on and spread your legs for me, love. Let me make you feel better..."

Your breath hitches and you obey his gentle command, spreading your legs apart and exposing your needy hole to him. Zayne's hot breath fans over your lips as a small smile plays on his, "Oh, so you can follow instructions..." You would've rolled your eyes as you usually would at a playful comment like that from him, but this wasn't under normal circumstances. You were way too needy for him right now and it was apparent in the soft little whine that comes out.

Zayne's fingers inch towards where you're aching for his touch and your hips instinctively raise up. Your eyes almost roll all the way back the second his thumb grazes against your clit and begins to move in slow circles, drawing out a moan from your lips.

Your exclamation of pleasure is swallowed by him as his lips seal around yours, Zayne's thumb now moving with far more vigor. Both of you are locked in a dance of sensuality, tasting each other's breaths and sounds as he unrelentingly draws out every drop of your want.

“You’re always so beautiful…”, Zayne breathes out, his thumb now slick from your arousal. You do your best to keep your eyes on his, but everything feels so hazy in the best of ways. All because of him, always because of him. Before you can even beg him for more, he nips lightly at your bottom lip and his voice comes out husky, “Please tell me I can take you right here, right now…”

He leans back just enough that his lips still graze yours as his hazel eyes search yours to make sure you’re still doing okay. He would do anything for you. He would even stop everything if you asked him to despite his hardened cock throbbing with need for you and you alone.

All you can manage is a small nod of your head and that’s all it takes for him to begin to tug down his sweats. But then he pauses, letting out a gruff sigh earning him a confused and dazed look from you. Seeing the look in your eyes, a soft hint of a smile plays on his lips, it's reassuring, “This isn’t about me right now, my love. This is about making you feel better and here I was about to be selfish.”

You paused for a moment and let out a huff of laughter, “You can be sel-“ Your words are interrupted by his quick readjustment of position and his mouth suddenly around your clit.

You suck in a sharp breath, your head tilts up against the plush pillow as your pretty lips part in pleasure. Zayne’s tongue flicks out as he begins to lap at your clit with gentle measure and just enough pressure to leave you whining for more friction.

Your hips buck slightly to meet his movements as his tongue slides between your folds and laps up your sweet arousal. If it was up to him, he would’ve stayed there all night, perfectly content to focus on your pleasure alone, but you wanted… no. You needed more. Your fingers slide into his soft dark hair, giving it a gentle tug to draw his attention to you.

Reluctantly, Zayne’s eyes meet yours once more, but not before giving your clit a little lick, “What is it, love?” You let out a breath that conveys your neediness more than any words ever could and Zayne knows you well enough to know exactly what you’re asking for.

Zayne gives a small smirk as he sits up, his eyes locked on yours, and tugs down his sweats, freeing his thick and throbbing length. Precum glistens on the tip and so much has gathered that it begins to drip down in a pearlescent strand that has you licking your lips.

Zayne’s large hand strokes his cock in a tantalizing motion that you can’t take your eyes off of. Slowly, he lowers himself once more and you spread your legs a little wider to accommodate his toned frame. His dripping tip rubs against your entrance, catching lightly on your clit which makes you draw in a breath.

“Tell me if it gets to be too much”, Zayne breathes out lowly before gently breaching your tight, slick walls. His nose scrunches up in pleasure as he lets out a groan. The feeling of being filled up by him feels heavenly and your mind immediately goes blank.

“Fuck, sweetheart… I swear you were made for me and me alone”, Zayne growls out softly. Once he’s fully inside, stretching you out so perfectly, he relaxes against you. His toned chest presses against your breasts and his nose nuzzles against yours, “You’re so perfect…” Everything about this moment is perfection. It’s something you didn’t even realize how much you missed in your time away from him until this very moment.

Zayne begins to move in a slow rhythm that has you feeling every inch of him, the tip of his leaking cock pressing into the deepest part of you and the thickness of his length that fills you in a way that makes you feel as though you’re finally complete.

Zayne presses little kisses against your lips as he makes love to you in the sweetest way. All he cares about is your comfort, pleasure, and happiness. He always has and always will be your sword and shield. In the days where you feel as if the world itself is hellbent on delivering a rain of sorrow upon your soul, Zayne will brave the downpour alongside you. In the coldest of nights, his embrace will continue to serve you as the warmest suit of armor. His love for you is ultimate. You are his reason.

Your voice breaks, the sound that leaps from your throat being an emotional mix of a sob and a moan. “Zayne, I-I need you.” You swear you can feel his cock throb against your upper walls in response to your declaration. Through all of your shared history, you can't recall a single time where you've produced such a raw profession of love. And, as your eyes flutter open to meet his, you know he understands the same.

“I’m here and I’m not going anywhere”, Zayne whispers against your lips, “Not now, not ever.” Before you can even form a response of your own, his lips seal around yours in the most tender of kisses. His hips follow suit, rolling and meeting your own with the most passionate and loving of movements. You moan into his mouth, breathing out into him as he breathes you in.

Your arms instinctively wrap around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer to you. His skin against yours, his cock drooling within your clenching walls, the taste of his moans upon your eternally wanting mouth… You feel yourself becoming one with Zayne. Your tight walls begin to squeeze around his cock, signaling how close you were to your end.

“Fuck…”, Zayne growls out in response to the feeling, thrusting a little harder as his cock throbs with the need to cum. But, again, this wasn’t about him. His priority is you.

Zayne reaches down and begins to thumb your clit in quick but measured circles, “Cum for me, my love. I need to feel you cum around my cock.” His breathing is labored as he desperately tries to hold back from filling you with his cum. He’s so desperate to bring you to your own orgasm before he allows himself to cum.

With a sweet cry from your swollen, kissed lips, you come undone around his thick length. Your walls pulsate around his cock, causing Zayne to bury his face into your neck with a groan. He can’t hold back any longer as his cock begins to throb wildly and thick ropes of cum spill inside of you. The feeling of his hot seed pooling inside of you, his breath pelting your sensitive neck…

You lose yourself to the torrent of pleasure that gushes from between your legs. “I love you…”, you breathe your need for him to life as you both simultaneously reach your peak. Zayne’s body relaxes on top of yours, his cock still nestled inside your soaked pussy.

You both lay there for a moment. Your hearts are both beating wildly, yet somehow still in sync. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, your nose, and then your lips before he speaks so softly and full of warmth, “I’ll always be here for you, my love.”

You feel your eyelids grow heavy, a grand warmth soothing every nerve in your body. Every ounce of love that Zayne houses within his heart has poured into you, and for the first time in your life, you accept it all without pretext. As your eyes close and before the soothing stillness of sleep takes you, a final sentence falls from his lips.

“I promise.”

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆ ˚❆.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆ ˚❆.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆ ˚❆.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆ ˚❆ .𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆

a/n: fun fact, i started this back in march and lost touch with it but HERE WE ARE!

[loveindefinitely]

༊*·˚ FOREVER WINTER (IF YOU GO) — task force 141 x reader

06 — PULL A TRIGGER, CLIMB A MOUNTAIN

featuring. simon 'ghost' riley + johnny 'soap' mactavish + kyle 'gaz' garrick + john 'bravo six' price + (non-endgame phillip graves)

warnings. nsfw, fem!reader, fmmmm, enemies to lovers, slow burn, polyamory, ghostsoap, pricegaz, alerudy, heavy angst, requited unrequited love, graphic violence

series masterlist. read on ao3. read on wattpad. fanfic playlist.

<- previous part | next part ->

Graves watches you, a sleazy smirk on his face as he sits in the helicopter, blood dripping from his forehead and empty rifle in hand.

With a wink, he chimes in through your channel, “See you when you’re useful again, baby.”

*

Three hours earlier.

*

“Change.”

Looking up, you give the hulking man the most annoyed expression you can muster, cocking your hip and folding your arms over your chest. He, in response, only raises a brow and folds his own arms, a clear mocking of your own stance.

Everyone else is already in the other room, checking over weaponry and making plans. They’re loud enough to be heard here, jovial laughter and quickly-spoken Spanish filtering in. A song plays, too, a nice kind of melody that you find yourself enjoying.

“I usually need a shot or two first,” you snark, making no move to take the folded clothes from the balaclava-clad man. “You buying?”

As he shoves the uniform into your chest, you shoot Ghost a nasty glare.

“We have stuff we need to do without you,” he quips, pushing against your shoulder hard enough to have you taking a step back. “That uniform’s too recognisable.”

“What, the American flag’s too much for you?” You lean in once more, shoving your own hand against his chest. He doesn’t budge. “I deserve to be involved, when I’m giving you intel. This whole exclusion bullshit reminds me of kindergarten.”

“Then change, and stop acting like you belong in one,” Ghost snaps, and with one final look your way, storms out of the main room, slamming the wooden sliding doors shut behind him as he does.

You’re alone, now. 

The room is vast, and at the small table still sits the laptop.

You’d… just. Done that. Threatened the very man who had taught you everything you know, the very man who had practically adopted you after your mother’s death. The very man of whom you’d just sentenced to death by your own hand. Your own lit match.

“Fuck,” you hiss, burying your face in your free hand.

This was the first time you’d had true solitude since. Well. It might’ve only been a day, but everything that’s happened has made it feel like years. Your throat itches from the knife wound, and you can feel your ribs’ bruising when you inhale.

“Fuck,” you curse once more, looking to the sliding doors.

After the call with Shepherd, the four men had been… well, they’d all had a very individualised response.

Soap had brought you in with an arm around your neck, ranting about how ‘badass’ you had been. Gaz had joined in, ruffling up your hair, placing a hand on your shoulder and asking if you were okay.

You’d said yes.

It had been a lie.

Ghost, without a word, had left to check over his magazines. Price had given you a firm nod and a pat on your back before, he too, left to the other room to sort things out.

“Lucky yer on our side, hen,” Soap had joked goodnaturedly. Gaz had rolled his eyes, saying, “You’re just happy your little Sweetheart can take you in a fight.”

Soap had immediately tackled him to the ground, and that was that.

Now, you stood, lone in the vast space of the room. It was still very early morning, the quiet sound of birds outside mixing with the rambunctiousness of the Los Vaqueros on the other side of the doors. Soft light filters in through the boarded up windows, casting over you in an odd haze.

Dropping the uniform onto the table, your brows furrow when you notice not only the 141’s standard uniform, but also a balaclava not unlike Ghost’s own.

The fabric is oddly soft as you run your hand over it, the paint cracking slightly against the nylon. Putting it aside for now, you then look over the uniform. A black long-sleeve compression shirt, baggy beige cargo pants. They’re definitely a bit too big for you, but admittedly, Ghost was right. It’d be too easy to spot you on the field if you were in Graves’ uniform.

Looking around the room, as if to cement the fact that you were alone, you quickly change, swapping out your bloody uniform for the new one.

It’s when you’re about to pull on the shirt that you look down, seeing the bruises lining your stomach. From the fight with Soap, or from one of your confrontations with the Shadows, you aren’t sure. Pressing softly against one, you can’t help a small grunt at the burst of pain.

You pull the compression shirt over your head, the fabric tight against your skin. How he’d had your size for the shirt and not the pants, you weren’t sure, but you weren’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Pulling over the new vest, you transfer all of your old items into it, finding this design much nicer. Not as constricting against your breasts, designed more unisex than Graves’ had been.

Grabbing the balaclava, your feet carry you to the sliding doors, and you open them with little struggle. 

You nearly stumble when you find all of the men within pulling on their own masks, stopping in your tracks at the sight. Ghost and Price’s backs are to you, and when you see Ghost pulling on one of the same masks, everything clicks.

He hadn’t wanted you to see his face – had used getting changed as a distraction.

And yet, here were the Los Vaqueros, some of which had never even spoken to Ghost, having the privilege. It shouldn’t make you angry, you shouldn’t care, but you can’t help the onslaught of rejection that floods your system.

When you step forward, into their line of sight, you straighten your spine and take out your gun from its holster, reloading it in precise movements, not looking down at it once. When the magazine clicks into place, you narrow your gaze on Ghost.

“Are we getting this done or having a fashion show?”

*

“That’s cold,” you murmur, eyes squeezed shut as war-torn fingers swipe grease paint around your eyes, careful in their placement. You sway when the vehicle drives over a pothole, but the fingers continue their ministrations without pause.

Price chuckles softly, wiping his thumb underneath your eye. “Used to do this for Ghost every other day,” he says under his breath, collecting more paint from the pot and continuing to spread it across the upper half of your face.

You’re in the back of a van with both Price and Gaz, Alejandro behind the wheel as you head back to his colonised base.

“You look like one of us now,” Gaz chimes, to your right. Watching you both carefully, his own paint already done, he leans back into his seat. “Uniform, mask… we’ve corrupted you, love.”

You roll your eyes beneath your eyelids. “Good luck with that.”

“Don’t test me,” he laughs, at the same time that Price pulls away once more, looking you over, before deciding that more paint will be needed.

“Feel like a kid at a fair,” you muse, earning a soft chuckle from Price. “Do I get glitter too?”

“Maybe if you’re a good girl,” Price jokes softly, and you let out a laugh of your own. Internally, you register your cheeks heating at the comment, a part of you yearning for such praise from the man. If it didn’t mess up your paint or cause the two to give you weird looks, you’d slap yourself.

“Can’t believe you’re Graves’ Colonel,” Gaz admonishes, and you barely restrain a huff of annoyance. He corrects himself. “Were. Man, he did not deserve you in his ranks. You probably would’ve done better as Commander than he ever could.”

You let your lips curve into a somewhat appreciative smile, eyes still shut as Price continues his studious work. “Believe it or not, we all loved him. Behind the scenes, he treated us pretty well. The guys, anyway.”

You can’t see it, but Gaz and Price share a knowing look, both of them raising their brows. Your eyes remain shut throughout their small, silent exchange.

“How so?” Price asks, gruff, and the tone encourages you to tell the truth.

“Well,” you swallow, unsure of how to approach the issue. You never have, never felt a reason to. “Just. Small things. Jokes, and stuff. I’m the only woman in the Company, actually–”

“What?” Gaz blurts out, not seeming able to stop himself. “You’re serious?”

You let out a somewhat self-deprecating chuckle. “...Yeah? That’s pretty normal in military jobs, y’know. Didn’t think it was that weird. At least I’m a Colonel.”

“You don’t think that’s… weird?” Price asks, and it’s only then that you realise he’s stopped painting your face. You blink open your eyes. “The only woman in his Company, and she’s his Colonel?”

Chewing on your inner cheek, you shake your head. “I was one of the very first to be hired by him. We… He was my partner. In nearly every sense of the word,” you admit, a small truth. “I mean. I don’t think that I loved him. Just. Never really had anyone else.”

“How old were you when you joined Shadow Co?” Gaz asks, slowly, carefully.

You mull it over, before supplying an easy answer. “Eighteen, or so. He was twenty-seven when he started, and –”

“That’s so fucked,” Gaz curses, burying his face in his hands. “Seriously. He’s a fucking asshole.”

You’re desperate for a change of topic, anything else but this. Not now, not when your wounds are too fresh, not when you’re about to come face to face with him again. With a deep breath, you divert the situation.

“Am I done?” You ask, looking to the window and trying to catch your reflection to no avail.

“...Yeah,” Price breathes, “You’re done.”

Easing back into your spot, you find your leg bouncing once more, the adrenaline of the upcoming mission keeping you antsy and energetic. You haven’t slept in over twenty-four hours, but you somehow find yourself more awake now than you had been hours ago.

Resting his hand on your knee, Gaz gives you a reassuring smile. “You ready?”

Letting out a low, unsure exhale, you find yourself nodding. “Yeah. I think so. I know what I’m going to say to him. I’m. He’ll come around.”

Gripping your mask in your hand, you move to pull it over your head, the fabric snugly fitting around your skin. It’s an odd sort of comfort, a way of protecting yourself from the emotional wreck that this mission will create. For the first time, you think that you can understand the attachment Ghost has to it.

“If we kill ‘im,” Price starts, but when you instantly flick your gaze to him, starts to backtrack, “If. If it comes down to it. You can’t hold it against us.”

You just check over your ammo, your cartridges, before simply replying.

“I’ll kill him myself.”

“We won’t make you do that,” Gaz says, adamant and firm as he leans in closer to you. “You don’t have to kill ‘im. I know most of us are wanting to do the honours, anyway.”

“I know Soap and Alejandro are just about begging to,” you acquiesce, but you find yourself focusing on the gun in your hands to reset your mindscape anyways. “But. It’s different. If he’s really done all of this… I want closure.”

“You’ll get your closure. Bloodshed or not,” Price pats your back, and you give him a small tilt of your lips, before realising that your mask covers the movement.

“You still good to split with Price and meet with the other team from the helo, hermana?” Alejandro calls from the front, turning slightly to look to you. You give him a thumbs up, and even with his mask on, you can tell he’s wearing a toothy smile.

“Your gun all good?” Gaz asks, jerking his head to the weapon. “Ammo in your pockets, cartridge full?”

Pulling your free hand into a gun gesture, you smile. 

“Pew.”

*

It’s with the weight of the world on your shoulders that you watch Price’s helicopter get shot.

“We’re hit! We’re hit!” Price calls through your shared radio channel, his voice frantic enough to have you skidding to a stop. Distantly, you think you can hear Ghost say something, but it’s quickly shadowed by Price’s, “Going down. We’re going down!”

You’re about a hundred feet away from where Rodolfo and Soap stand, the two also seeming to pause behind a warehouse of some sort.

When you see Soap move to push Rodolfo up the wall, you run as fast as your legs will take you to their position, calling out to them, “I’m coming with!”

“Thought you weren’t making it, cariño!” Rodolfo calls out as you fall alongside them, your heartbeat raging in your ears. 

“Can’t get rid of me that easy,” you jest, then pause when you see Ghost to your side. Jerking your head to the wall, you ask, “Need a personal invitation?”

“Price and the pilot need help. You three finish this,” he shakes his head, before turning and leaving for the crash site. Shrugging, you spin back to where Rodolfo’s extending his hand to help you up, which you accept, reaching the top of the wall and swinging your right thigh over it, straddling the brick.

Extending your arm down, you pull Rodolfo up, Soap taking his other hand in a firm grip. When Rodolfo swings around to sit between you both, he curses under his breath. 

“Look!” Soap hisses, and when you do as he says, your own stomach falls down to the dirt floor beneath you.

“That’s not ours,” Rodolfo murmurs, and you can barely find your voice.

“A tank,” you say, mindlessly, watching on as a fucking tank pulls into the training area of the compound. “Graves… he has a fucking tank?”

Neither of the two respond, both instead jumping off of the wall, falling into a crouch as they land. They both extend hands to you, more of a supporting gesture than anything, but you don’t take them as you too land on the other side of the brick, entering the training area.

“Ye ready for this?” Soap asks the two of you, a hint of mania creeping onto his blood-flecked face.

“Hell yeah,” Rodolfo breathes, before looking to you with a friendly smile. Ruffling your hair, a familiar gesture, now, he squeezes the nape of your neck. “If you come out of this alive, hermana, we could use you in the Los Vaqueros.”

You bark a laugh, stunned, almost, before shaking your head. “You should talk to your boss about recruiting people, first.”

Rodolfo shrugs. “Ale likes to make me happy.”

“Interviews can happen later, aye?” Soap chuckles, and the three of you look to the tank once more. “Bigger fish to catch, and allat.”

You go to say something else, when –

“Didn’t realise you boys were into kidnapping women now. That’s a bit sketchy, ain’t it?”

Graves. He’s – he’s got a radio, he’s talking, he’s here, he’s. He’s fucking with you, trying to play mind games, trying to break you all over –

“Can’t wait to bake this bastard,” Soap grunts, and you find your footing once more. Sure, you were ready for battle, but your entire reason for being here was to talk to him. Get him to realise his mistakes, come forward, go back to the man you knew.

Rodolfo and Soap are running somewhere, doing their part, and you –

“Is what they said true?” It’s the most important question you have right now. The answer you yearn for.

A moment passes.

“Where did you go, gorgeous? When’d they get ya? Did they blackmail you in Las Almas?” He diverts, and you tighten your grip on your gun, swallowing your litany of curses.

“Answer my questions, Commander. Is. What they said. True.”

“It doesn’t matter, baby. Remember where your loyalties lie,” Graves takes on a sweeter tone, a more… condescending one, you think. 

“Please,” you find yourself whispering, begging for him to just. Break this nightmare, rebel against it, be Phillip. “Please tell me this isn’t really you.”

“Oveja pequeña,” he coos, and you swear your spine erupts in hives, “I’m still your Phillip. You’re the one who’s changed – look at you, running off with the 141. I’m disappointed.”

You erupt, then, like a dormant volcano, finally gathering the final push to let lava reign free.

“I’m going to fucking kill you! You just killed fathers, tore apart families! I fucking hate you!” You yell into the radios, no tears falling, merely anger and vengeance clouding your vision.

“Don’t forget that you are under my orders. Whether you’re in my bed or not, you’re my Colonel,” he seethes back, and like a shot while you’re already down, you realise that this is a hopeless cause. You weren’t going to save Shepherd. You weren’t going to save Graves.

All you had left to save was yourself.

They’d lied to you, an indefinite amount of times, for how long, you weren’t sure. Your whole relationship – was that a lie, too? Was your entire life?

“I’m your second in command,” you finally admit out loud, hiding behind a crumbling wall as the tank shoots just a few feet away from you. “So when you get taken down, guess who comes out on top?”

“Listen to yourself!” He shouts, his voice cracking in his sudden anger, “Listen–”

“No, you listen!” You find yourself crying out, taking a few shots at the tank, allowing Soap and Rudy to do their part. “Listen to me, Phillip. You’re going to regret this – all of this. When were you going to tell me you were under Shepherd’s orders, huh? How long have you been fucking me over!”

“Whenever you first came around my cock is my guess, baby,” he responds, icy and cold.

His words only seem to further encourage you to breaking point, adding more and more fury to rush down your veins like its very own hit of morphine.

“Guess what, Commander?”

“Don’t bull–”

“That first time, and every time since?”

He doesn’t bother to interrupt you.

“I faked it.”

With that, you switch Channels to one shared with all of you.

You had heard everything you needed to, and along with it, realised something of vital importance. A small inconsistency that changed everything.

“Ghost team,” you say, neutral and unforgiving, “Graves isn’t in the tank.”

“What’re ye talking about?!” Soap calls through, exuding exhaustion, the sound of explosions crackling through behind his vocals. “He has to be–”

“He’s not,” you say, firm, absolute in your decision. “I don’t know where he is – but he’s not in there. Not his style, anyway – prefers to be in the spotlight.”

“What do we do then, hermana?” Rodolfo asks, sounds strained just as Soap had.

Your answer is easy. “You guys focus on the tank – I’m taking Graves down.”

With that, you run for the wall once more, and with nothing but your intuition, you know exactly where you’ll find your ex-Commander.

*

As per usual when it comes to your gut-feelings, you’re correct. 

It’s within the hanger on the compound that you find him getting into a helicopter – a wound on his forehead and tactical glasses on. Somehow, he’s already found himself injured – a small, selfish part of you satisfied with that information.

“Commander!” You yell as you break through the small window of the hangar, using the butt of your gun to do it. It’s as the door to the heli shuts that he notices you – and you switch back on to his radio.

“This is your last chance,” he grits out, his voice thin and furious. “Before this becomes more than a… domestic fight.”

You wince as the blades start turning, taking shelter behind one of the cargo boxes, wary of any bullets being shot your way. “The only domestic thing about us was your inclination for treating me like your little wife.”

“Always did think you’d look pretty barefoot and pregnant,” he muses, and oh, have you never wanted to kill a man more in your life.

“Aww,” you mock, as the blades’ whirring gets louder and shots echo around you finally, “See, I think you’d look pretty bleeding out at my feet.”

“You did look rather good at mine,” he retorts, and your emotions get the better of you as you peek, shooting three Shadows behind the heli with easy headshots. You’re barely there for two seconds before a burning pain echoes through the side of your shoulder, and you duck down once more.

“Couldn’t even get off,” you pant, relentless to the very end even as your breaths turn into heavy falls of your shoulders, “Was like fucking a Ken doll.”

“You’ve always been a petty bitch,” he snaps, and you smirk.

“I am a bitch, you’re right. And you know what bitches do when someone taunts them? They bite.”

You raise your gun, and for a scary, short second, you realise that blood is flowing in a stream that’s causing the sleeve of your black shirt to grow sticky and damp. Now isn’t the time to care, however, as you take aim at one of the windows of the heli.

Pulling the trigger, the bullet bursts through the window, glass shattering and falling to the ground. It’s as soon as it does, however, that it takes flight, boosting in its acceleration immediately.

Fully peeking, this time, you watch as the helicopter quickly takes off, and even if you had the capacity to shoot at it, it wouldn’t hit the intended target, not with your trembling hands.

Graves watches you, a sleazy smirk on his face as he sits in the helicopter, blood dripping from his forehead and empty rifle in hand.

With a wink, he chimes in through your channel, “See you when you’re useful again, baby.”

You get one final sentence in, before the radio cuts off. Even though you can’t see him from this distance, you’re sure you’re making eye contact as you deal your final blow.

“My callsign isn’t baby. It’s Sweetheart.”

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author's note. to everyone asking about the covid, its prettyyy bad haha. i can hardly leave my bed and need 3 blankets in the peak of summer!

at least that means i have downtime to write before my life gets VERY hectic. thank you all for your support again, the feedback and praise for the last chapter made me feel 10x better and i genuinely appreciate you all SO much. thank you thank you thank you!

[jirsungs]

ep 17: i missed you (too)

word count: 3.1k

You join Jisung in the kitchen and when he sees you arrive, he hops off the counter before he can look at your choice of outfit for the evening. 

But when he does, he wishes he could rewind the moment you walked in so he can pay more attention because holy fuck. Those words were the only coherent thing he could pull out of his brain, but he didn’t blame himself for the mental trouble, because seriously, holy fuck.

Lord, he wishes that no one else has seen you in this black strapless midi dress, which he’s 80% sure is from Kukombo, he remembered you and Ning raving about it a couple of weeks back. Your hair perfectly dolled up, just like the first time he saw you, with your pearl necklace layered by your Tiffany & Co. Infinity Pendant necklace sitting pretty on your collarbone.

He recalls you gushing about how much you love layering jewelry pieces together or how complete it makes you feel on the first night you hung out alone. He also remembers you telling him that the Tiffany & Co. necklace you’re wearing now was bought with Renjun’s card after you begged him on your birthday. 

“You look pretty.” Jisung blurts out before his brain can process that those words actually left his mouth.

His compliment makes you smile. “Thank you.”

Should I have said more? Was that not enough? She looks absolutely gorgeous, but if I say that, I might come off desperate and I am not desperate. Wait. Am I?

Pfft, no, of course not.

He shakes out of his mental dilemma when he hears you talk again, “You too—I mean, you look good.”

Despite you seeing him blush in front of you and mumble a “thank you”, his physical appearance did not match. An awkward guy dressed in his black graphic t-shirt and gray denim baggy jeans. To everyone else, he was seen as a stern, quiet dude who stayed close to his friends and played drums weekly, but to you? He was anything but stern or quiet.

“What’s with us always meeting in kitchens?” You try to joke, your horrible attempt to ease the weird tension in the air.

It was a pretty bad joke, if you could even call it one, but at least, you know that there will be someone who laughs at anything you say. And that’s Jisung. “Right? I guess it’s the place where we’re just destined to be together. We first met in Karina’s kitchen, then had our first interaction after Karina’s party in Johnny’s kitchen—”

“One horrible interaction.” You both wince at the immature memory. 

“Yep, it was pretty bad… But now, you’re here with me in Chenle’s kitchen after… ghosting me for two weeks.”

An awkward laugh escapes your mouth, not knowing what to say now that the air suddenly grew uncomfortable. Fortunately for you, Jisung doesn’t notice and is instead embarrassed by himself.

“Sorry, I said kitchen too many times. That was–it sounded weird.”

It’s been two weeks without him and yet somehow, he still holds the power of making it impossible for you to be mad at him. You hate that you always find his awkwardness endearing.

“You’re fine, Ji. In fact, it didn’t sound weird to me at all.” You reassuringly smile, nudging his side.

And that one overused nickname he's heard from multiple different people sounded the prettiest when it came from you. A light switched in him and the next thing you know, Jisung's ranting about Rockway's past gig to Jeno breaking their blender after attempting to make a blueberry banana smoothie for him before their workout at the gym.

Your friends come over once they spot you two in the kitchen corner together, cutting your conversation short. Suddenly, you’re in the arms of Ning and Haechan, engulfing you in a hug while Jisung is kept occupied in conversation with Renjun, Mark, and Jaemin. 

Soon after, your interactions die down with Ning and Haechan accompanying each other to go dance and the three guys who busied Jisung left due to Chenle pulling them away for a game of beer pong. 

Chenle was successful in dragging Jaemin and Renjun while Mark followed suit. But as Mark was about to leave, he stopped to offer Jisung a spot to join, which you encouraged, since Rockway usually boasts about how skilled he is at the game. But he turned down his friend’s offer with a shake of his head. 

You guess Jisung made a signal to the clueless guitarist because Mark says no more, glancing between you and him before letting out an “Ohhh…” He winks at the guy next to you, who you see grow more flustered by the minute, and exits out of the kitchen.

Jisung finally lets go of the breath you didn’t realize he was holding onto for so long and you’re left alone together once more.

The quiet gives Jisung the perfect opportunity to continue catching up with you. You’re not even thirty minutes into the conversation when it gets interrupted again, this time by Yeonjun and Jeno whining about their loss in beer pong. And after multiple pleas from them, they were finally able to pull the beloved drummer boy away from your side.

“I’ll be right back after this, I promise.” Jisung gives you one last pouty look before the guys tug him by the arms. 

“Yeah yeah, don’t get clingy, lover boy.” Yeonjun chirps out as he and Jeno drag him away, the latter following up with a, “We’ll take good care of him, Y/N!”

Your eyes follow the three guys, they join the crowded table that has multiple red solo cups set on either side, and you take notice of how Jisung radiates a whole new light when he’s surrounded by his bandmates, along with your friends. You adored that you all became such a tight-knit group so quickly. It’s nice. Well, sometimes. Haechan and Mark currently screaming over one another is one of the reasons why you say “sometimes.”

“You guys already have Yeonjun! Let us have Jisunggg!” Haechan whines. 

Mark lets out a humorless laugh, “What’re you talking about? Renjun clearly made y’all win last game!”

Your eyes shift over to Jisung, who’s covering his ears at the noise. It makes you laugh under your breath.

Luckily, the argument between Haechan and Mark didn’t last long because the next time you looked over, they were already concentrating on their game. Shotaro, a mutual friend of Rockway’s, was focusing his aim on the cup. 

While Jisung is playing beer pong with the others, you’re left alone, feeling peaceful as you watch the party around you. But to your dismay, your content mood turns sour when you see Jaeyun, your ex-situationship, walk over.

“Y/N alone at a party? That’s a new one.” He snickers, pouring himself a cup of the cheap beer.

You watch him take a sip and scowl. “What are you doing here?” 

“It’s an open-invite party, pretty face. You know I never skip out on these.”

“You’re not even friends with Chenle, or anyone here, for that matter.”

Jaeyun takes another sip of his drink, “Eh, so what? Again,” He lowers himself to directly meet your eyes, “It’s a free party.”

He disgusts you.

Once Jisung takes his turn throwing the small ping-pong ball towards the cup and it lands inside, as expected, his teammates Jeno, Mark, Yeonjun, and Wonbin cheer and hype the drummer up at his performance. 

As Jisung glances between the four guys surrounding him, he sees you accompanied by someone in the background. His friends don’t notice him moving to the back of them as their attention is set on Jeno already being pushed to the front for his turn.

His eyes widen when he realizes who's talking to you. Jaeyun. The one guy you told him about on your first hangout together when he was curious about your past. He’s glad you didn’t hide yourself away from him when he asked because now, he knows that the guy is nothing but a lovebombing asswipe. But what he isn’t so thrilled about is the fact that he shares a class with the guy, let alone the same major. 

You’re uneasy, he can tell. It’s painful to watch. And he’s sure your feeling gets worse once he sees you grow visibly stiff when a girl comes over and kisses Jaeyun on the cheek.

Insecure isn’t typically a word Jisung would use to describe himself. He sometimes becomes doubtful of himself, sure, but insecure isn’t a word that would be in his pile of descriptions. Plus, he knows he's on your mind every second of every day, and that was more than enough assurance for him. 

But Jaeyun intimidated the hell out of him, he knew this, despite being a few months older than him, Jaeyun was bulkier and he was aware that his looks could kill, he guessed that’s how he got you gripped on him at one point in your life. However, that still didn’t stop him from excusing himself from his friends, lying to them that he needed to go to the bathroom.

Surprisingly, his friends paid no attention to his departure with how engrossed they were in their game, making it easier for him to rush to the kitchen. 

You’re too busy tolerating Jaeyun and his next fling’s drained conversation they were having with you, to notice him walk in. That is until you feel a presence beside you and an arm wrapped around your waist, leading you to look up at the culprit and see Jisung. It was new seeing him touch you so comfortably like this, or be possessive either. You weren’t complaining though, it was definitely something you could get used to.

But the said man doesn’t have time to make eye contact with you because all he’s focused on is his main goal here, and that’s for Jaeyun to get out of your goddamn face.

“Sim, you’re not making her uncomfortable, are you?”

What is he doing? You think. Jaeyun letting out a low whistle and opening his obnoxious mouth again doesn’t allow you to dwell on it.

“Wow, Y/N, I didn’t think you were into,” He eyes Jisung up and down unimpressed, “lousy playing drummer boys all that much.”

Oh God.

You feel Jisung’s arm around you tense up, “What did you just say?”

Jaeyun only snickers. You watch Woona, his new fling who you, unfortunately, remember the name of cling onto him tighter. You roll your eyes at the action.

“I mean, as far as I remember, you were better than picking underground losers off the low-paying nightclubs his band plays at.”

You scoff. It was obvious he knew nothing about Jisung, Rockway, or any of their successes, “You’re full of shit, Jaeyun.”

Your ex-situationship couldn’t care less about what you said because once he sees Jisung’s fuming face slightly falter, he knows he got him. So he continues, “Jisung, I’m warning you now, man. You better find a better chick 'cause all you got right now is some bitch who’ll whore around for anyone with a dick attached—”

Everything happens in a blink of an eye. You seriously don’t know how.

One moment Jisung’s arm is wrapped around your body then the next, he and Jaeyun are on the kitchen floor while Jisung lunges at him right away, giving Jaeyun barely time to react before his fist crashes down on him. The connection to Jaeyun’s jaw creates a painful crunch that echoes across the room, resulting in some partygoers reacting to the scene.

Your expression never changes as you watch in disbelief at the whole thing, Woona instantly screaming and trying to push Jisung off. It doesn’t work though, she falls over when Jaeyun attempts to regain himself, bouncing back a punch that has Jisung’s head taking a hit to the side. But Jisung rapidly returns his attention. Regaining control of his fist, he delivers another vicious blow to Jaeyun’s face, then follows with another, and another, and by the next punch, he finds himself losing control.

The number of punches he’s thrown, Jisung stays unaware of it, and frankly, he doesn’t give a shit about it. He continues to stay unaware even when people’s arms are grasping him from behind to force him from the wounded Jaeyun.

“Jisung, what the fuck is wrong with you?” It isn’t until Haechan’s distressed voice snaps him out of his daze, that he finally notices Jaeyun being helped up by Yuta and Jungwoo.

He observes Jaeyun’s bleeding lip and bruised face and finds no remorse in his heart. Throwing punches at the guy isn’t the worst thing he could’ve done, he knew that Jaeyun knew he deserved it too.

Instead of answering Haechan and the others as their worries talk over one another, his breath remains raggedy when he takes a glance over at you, you didn’t move from the spot, your hand over your chest as you’re heaving, trying to recollect yourself from what just happened. His gaze is fixated on you while your eyes shift between Jaeyun and Woona, who’s giving you the worst side eye known to man. 

Jisung guesses he didn’t hit Jaeyun hard enough, because he dares to open his mouth again. His voice raspy and taunting, “Shit, you’re lucky your band came to the rescue ‘cause I would’ve ripped you apart.”

“You never shut your mouth, do y—” It was stupid, Jisung knew it was, but it still had him attempting to pounce forward in the grasp of his friends but they swiftly pulled him back, making loud protests.

With all the voices that rang throughout the room, Chenle’s was the only one that caught Jisung’s attention, seeing his best friend angry was a usual thing, just not like this, “Ji, if you don’t wanna calm yourself down, take this shit outside.”

“Fine.” The younger’s eyes soften as he looks between Haechan and Jaemin who are currently holding him, “Let go of me.”

Haechan arches his brow at him, unsure of whether to trust Jisung or if he'll start something when he’s freed, but the two exchange a look before letting him go.

And just like that, Jisung storms out of the kitchen, paying no mind to Jaeyun who tries to reach for him. He exits Chenle’s apartment, and you immediately follow after him. 

Your hurried steps make contact with the concrete sidewalk as you reach outside of the house, trying to walk faster to match his pace. The cold air quickly reaches your body, making you rub your arms in hopes of warming up. 

When you’re walking close behind him, you speak up, “Jisung, I can’t believe you just did that! That whole thing was unnecessary, I don’t even know why you decided to get yourself hurt over someone as stupid as Jaeyun!” Your words coming out as a scold.

His abrupt stop in his tread almost makes you bump into him, but he turns himself around and faces you. He lashes out. “Unnecessary? My ass, it was unnecessary! I couldn't stand hearing him talk about you like that, especially when he's the one who treated you like garbage.”

Confused at his sudden outburst, you lash back, “Jisung, why did you do that?”

Jisung releases a deep breath, “Y/N, I did it because…” He can’t dare to look at you, so he glances up at the night sky instead. "Geez..."

You grow angrier seeing his focus not on you, “What, Jisung? What?”

“Fuck, because I like you, you idiot! Can’t you see that?” Your eyes slightly widen and you swallow the next agitated remark resting on your tongue. With you now becoming quiet, he allows himself to slowly calm down, “Look… I know I'm not the best with words, we know that. But these whole two weeks of me waiting by the phone just for one single text from you confused the hell outta me. I mean, at one point, you're hating me, and then I'm hating you, to us being friends, now to whatever this is.” He motions his hands between the two of you in a stressed manner.

Still. You can’t believe your ears, so you dumbly ask, “You what?”

He’s calmed down by this point, looking like an ashamed puppy, “I like you, Y/N. I really really like you.”

“And what makes you think I didn't feel the same?” Now it's Jisung's turn to be confused, his lost eyes being nothing but cute to you. Even beaten up, he was adorable. You sigh, “I like you too, stupid.” 

“Oh, thank God.” 

In a flash, his head is tilted down to match your height, and he leans in, his hands reaching for your jaw. Then, his lips meet yours. His fingers keep their place on your jaw, gentle and scared to move down. Finally, he thinks. Expecting you to pull away, he’s surprised when you kiss him back, your hands gripped on his shirt, pulling him closer to you. Fireworks weren’t going off, but your heart sure felt like they were.

You never thought your first kiss with Jisung would be like this, desperate and full of want. But you don’t care, he longed for this, and so did you. 

He pulls away and rests his forehead on yours. He circles your waist with both arms, before he speaks, his breath still heavy, “I know that you told me you always wished for a fairytale kiss, but I couldn’t help it anymore. So, uh, I hope that kinda made up for it?”

He just kissed you and he’s awkward?

You affectionately smile, “It made up for it, Ji. Really.” You loop your arms around his neck. “Now is this a bad time to apologize for how stupid it was to ghost you or…?”   

He chuckles, “You’re cute.” You pout and mumble a “shut up” before he continues, “But yes, it is. I mean, I already forgave you the moment you came over. I’m kinda hurt you didn’t realize that.”

His fake frown leads you to remove one arm from his neck and smack his chest, “I can’t read between the lines!” 

“My bad, my bad. That was my fault for thinking so.”

You hmph, both of your arms taken off his neck for you to cross them instead, “Thank you.”

Jisung thinks your attitude is adorable, and he can’t even be mad at you. Especially with you finally in his arms again after yearning for you for three months, it made everything worth it.

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note: THEY FINALLY SAID IT YALLL 🙏 this chapter is cliché and cheesy af!!!! but did i still kick my feet proofreading it? of course, i did 🤭 also so sorry for such a late update ☹️, i got busy prioritizing other things! but i'm finally back!

🎫: @idkwhatursayinh @sunghoonsgfreal @multifandomania @nanaxwi @odxrilove @sourrpatched @hancafe @chaellaa @dojaejunging @jising-jisang-jisung @heheheeral @haechansbbg @renjunsversion @seunghancore @woshixinqgiu @jiiieun @pinknjm @mrshwang-park @neozon3nha @joyzluvr @aerivrs @nosungluv @haechology @beomgyusonlywife @injunnie-lemon @tommina @222low

[irisintheafterglow]

every love I've known in comparison is a failure

summary: the stars appear over baratie, creating the perfect atmosphere to embarrass your husband. (opla!zoro x you)

wc: 2k

cw/tags: established relationship, swearing, allusions to canon-typical blood and violence, drinking and alcohol, flashback to a very silly meet ugly lol

note: (part one is linked here!) HELLO ZORO NATION, here is the highly requested part 2 to "if he's a ghost then i can be a phantom." hope you like it, i definitely had fun writing it because he's just,,,, such a himbo man. @alphaash99 thank you for the inbox ask, sorry it took so long to answer!!

likes, reblogs, and replies are appreciated!

“I don’t know what else to tell you; that’s really all there is to it,” you laugh, taking another sip from your glass. “He brings me heads and I give him money.” 

“Brought you heads,” your husband corrects from your side, his arm draped securely over your shoulders. “Right now, I’m the one with a fire under my ass.” 

“Mhmm, but apparently I’m still giving you money,” you remind him, nodding toward the overflowing coin pouch of Berry at the center of the table. He shrugs a broad shoulder in defeat, unsuccessfully trying to hide his smile. 

“Okay, but you’re leaving out the part where you somehow fell in love with this…oaf.” Nami gestures vaguely at the crew’s swordsman and his jaw drops in indignation. Luffy and Usopp break into another fit of delirious giggling while Sanji leaves to fetch yet another bottle. Everyone present knew his ego was bruised from his failed attempts to charm you. “I think he has less romantic appeal than an overripe banana.”

“At this point, just say that I’m ugly,” he chuckles lightheartedly and she shakes her head in exasperation. “I’m obviously not that bad since this is who I married.” The two remaining boys at the table give polite applause, to which Zoro murmurs his melodramatic appreciation like he was accepting an award. You couldn’t remember the last time he was this relaxed while he was drinking. Most of the time, you had to steer him to whatever ship he was calling home for the night while simultaneously preventing him from stabbing anything that moved. 

“Yeah, keep telling yourself that,” Nami snorts and Zoro makes a mocking face that you raise your hand up to cover. “But, seriously. How’d he get you?” You pause, searching for words in your foggy mind and getting distracted by the speckling of midnight stars up above. Following the disastrous first meeting with the crew’s chef, their swordsman reluctantly introduced you to the rest of his new friends. You spent the remainder of the evening sipping a fruity drink with your legs crossed over your husband’s lap and regaling the table with embarrassing stories about their favorite stoic crewmate. 

“In all honesty, our first meeting was a fluke,” you admit after some time. Sanji returns with a new bottle and pours himself a hefty glass before sliding it to the center of the group, settling in to listen to your story. “I was there by mistake; he was there by mistake. I guess the two canceled out.” 

Years ago, when you were still confined to the walls of the Marine base, a series of unexpected changes in your itinerary allowed you an afternoon of freedom. You were visiting from your father’s countryside estate to once again ask if you could sail on one of his ships, only to receive the same dismissive answer as every request before. As if to rub more salt in the wound, he also notified you that Mihawk would be docking in two days time to continue your training. After jumping the gun a little too early and skipping the flattery dinner to get him drunk enough to grant your request, you were left with an extra day to wander the dry, lifeless walls of the installation. With a leg propped up on your father’s expensive leather chair and the other resting on the windowsill facing the ocean, you don’t bother turning when the door opens and the sound of boots echoes through the office. 

“Get out and I won’t tell the captain you came in here,” you say boredly, staring at the vast blue water that seemed to spell out freedom in the seafoam. The voice that replies is too disrespectful to ever come from the mouth of one of your father’s underlings. 

“I wasn’t aware the captain wore such promiscuous clothing.” You startle, swiveling abruptly to face the stranger that entered the room. He wasn’t a Marine at all, you quickly realized, not with that bright green hair and enough wrinkles in his clothes to look like your great grandfather’s forehead. But, what gave him away the most was his eyes. They weren’t like the eyes of other men you looked at, the ones who would cower or rake over you like you were some entree at a feast. No, this stranger looked at you curiously and with amusement that irked you. 

He looked at you like you were a new challenge. 

“Who are you?”

“Roronoa Zoro, the Pirate Hunter,” he replies and your eyes flick to his sharp jawline. If he weren’t in the room, you would have slapped yourself to regain your composure. “I have a bounty I’d like to turn in.” He tosses a burlap sack dripping with dark liquid onto your father’s equally expensive desk and you don’t even flinch. Your lack of a reaction seems to spur him further and he tilts his head to the side, studying you. 

“What’d my old man promise you?” 

“The captain is your father?” His eyes narrow on you and you glare, not backing down. 

“Answer my question first,” you fire back without hesitation. 

“Five hundred thousand Berry,” he answers and you nod, reaching over to one of the intricately carved drawers and pulling out a stack of bills and a dense pouch of coins. Rolling the bills into a wad and stuffing it into the coin purse, he catches it with ease when you toss it to him. “You’re not gonna verify if I’m giving you the right number?”

“That would imply that I care about how much you’re taking from my father,” you point out, “Which, I really don’t. I couldn’t care less, frankly, if you ransacked this entire office. Just don’t get caught or both our asses will have a fire under them.” He hums in assent and turns to leave, but as his hand hovers over the door handle, he hesitates and looks at you over his shoulder. 

“What are you doing here by yourself?”

“Trying to figure out how to sneak out of this fucking hellhole,” you mutter with obvious distaste. A thoughtful look crosses his features and he chucks you a crumpled cloak from a nearby dressing table. “What are you–”

“Put it on. Let’s get out of here,” he states and you hastily throw it over your clothes, slipping behind the swordsman while he guides you out of the base. He knows his way around the tunnels and, with the cloak obscuring your identity, successfully sneaks you out of the dusty beige walls of the base. The smell of garlic and fried food wafts into your nostrils and you drift toward it, feeling in your pocket for your own small coin pouch. Zoro falls into step next to you effortlessly and follows you to the enticing grill. “Someone’s hungry.”

“I’ve been eating nothing but government slop for the past twenty four hours. If I have to see another spoonful hit my plate, I’ll actually die,” you deadpan and the corner of his mouth turns up in amusement. Without bothering to count the amount, you drop a handful of coins into the vendor’s roughened palms and ask for enough food to feed you and the man next to you. She gladly obliges, stacking various grilled sticks of food onto a plate and thanking you profusely for your generosity. “We’re gonna eat and you’re going to explain to me why you snuck me out,” you command and you’re glad to sense him continue to stay by your side. 

During the few hours you spend with Zoro, you find yourself utterly enthralled by him and he is fascinated by you. You listen to his stories about hunts and his bounties and find yourself in awe of how non-arrogantly he speaks of his job. You’d sat down for numerous fancy dinners with egotistical Marines that wanted to sleep their way into good graces with your father, but eating with Zoro was nothing like that. He was an amazing listener and, when you thought he was just ignoring something you said, he ended up saying something just as thoughtful a few moments later. His visits became more frequent and you continued to find excuses to linger around the base in hopes that he would sneak you out again. Your father’s rage would end both of you if he ever found out, but the thrill of secrecy was your newest addiction. 

“He asked to marry me a few years after I helped him empty my dad’s wallet,” you recall, fondly remembering the disaster that was his proposal. “He had this whole shabang planned out with a sunset and fancy cheeses–”

“And then it fucking rained,” he grumbles before taking another sip. “Fucking storm rolled in and blew away the entire setup.” 

“That’s still romantic, though,” Luffy offers reassuringly. “Getting down on one knee in the rain.”

“It is,” you smirk, “if he didn’t drop the ring off the cliffside.” The crew erupts into shocked cackling, tears pricking the edges of their eyes. 

“You dropped the fucking ring?” 

“The wind was strong!” 

“Wait, so then how’d you get that one?” Usopp points at the green gem embedded in the simple gold band. It was strikingly similar to the one hanging from a chain around your husband’s neck, a decision made so he didn’t lose it while he was fighting. 

“He went out and bought one from the market the next day. It was, what, fifty Berry?”

“You bought them a cheap ass ring after you dropped the expensive one,” Nami echoes in disbelief. Zoro opens his mouth to argue but is cut off with even louder shrieks from the table. “How the hell did you pull them?”

“It’s something I ask myself every time I see this ring,” he concedes. “But one thing I do know is that they deserve more than I can ever give them.” The soft look on his face when he turns to you never fails to make your body feel like it’s floating. It’s only when Luffy slams his palms on the table decisively that you snap out of your lovesick trance.

“Alright, that settles it,” he states with finality. 

“Settles what?”

“You’re going to join our crew.” Usopp raises his glass like he’d seen the order coming from miles away. Sanji turns a slightly darker shade of pink but doesn’t protest. 

“I could use someone that isn’t oozing with testosterone on the ship,” Nami adds when you’re unable to respond immediately. You can feel Zoro’s body tense next to you and, when you place a comforting hand on his shoulder, it feels like pure stone. He knew firsthand that asking you to leave was a touchy subject, especially when it was hard for the child of a captain to disappear into the blue. If you were out there with him, he told you, he wouldn’t be able to assure your safety when he was on hunts. Though you both knew you could handle yourself just fine, it always seemed to be a matter of poor timing when it came to running away together. Poor timing, that is, until now. 

Zoro wasn’t alone now, and you don’t even hesitate. 

“Do I get to choose a cool signature weapon like everyone else?” The captain’s face breaks into a blinding grin and begins a long ramble of different weapons you could choose from. Your husband’s body hasn’t lost its stiffness and he lowers his voice to a tone that only you could hear. 

“Are you sure about this?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” His eyebrows furrow, unconvinced. “I said I’d do anything to be with you, didn’t I?”

“But piracy, love? You’re willing to go that far for me?”

“You know I’d go even farther if I needed to,” you murmur and that settles it. You catch an excited glint in Zoro’s eye and lean in closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder. “You’re not the only swordsman on the ship anymore, husband.”

“And I’ve finally gotten you out of that damned base, so I think it’s a good time to renew those vows.”

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[soapybutt17]

Labour pt.1

Summary:A mission has gone sideways, you find your husband compromised alongside Gaz and because of it you were tasked with handling most of the mess that came after. What you didn’t expect was to be chewed out and spat on by one Philip Grave. Character: John Price x F!Wife!Reader. Philipp Graves. Simon "Ghost" Riley, Johnny "Soap" MacTavish. OC Children (Joey, Katherine). Price's mother (Beatrice Price). Word Count: 2,160 Chapter Warnings: Misogynism. Sexism. Graves is being a complete peace of shit here. Angst. Reader is literally breaking down here. Only hurt no comfort until the second part. John is being a little bit of a POS here. Author's Note: Song Inspo is this

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part II

You tried you best, you truly did but it was not easy to keep a straight face as you were notified that both your husband and Gaz were compromised because of wrong intel. It was hard not to scream at Laswell because it was her intel that left your husband wounded and barely awake as the doctors were tending to his and Gaz’s wound. It was even harder to reassure both Ghost and Soap that everything would be alright even if it wouldn’t be.

“What the fuck happened?”

No, this was actually the hardest for you as you stared at the obnoxiously arrogant bastard of a man named Philip Graves. He was blaming everyone else but himself. His shadows all nodding along with his rant while you sat in the meeting room. You kept silent. You wanted to wait until he let out all of his steam before you began. But it doesn’t seem like he was stopping any time soon.

“We followed Laswell’s Intel. Someone might have caught wind of it and attacked first.” It was Ghost that decided to cut the ranting.

It’s been a long and far too tedious mission for everyone and it’s coming close to a year now since you and your husband have returned back home. Close to a year since you’ve actually seen your son and daughter and missing out on most of their milestones because of it. You were at your breaking point and men blaming you want not helping in the matter.

“Laswell’s intel was perfect it was the execution your team made that ruined the mission.”

You took a deep breath as the anger grew ten folds because of the man.

“Are you done?” You inquired knowing it was time to talk since the conversation was going nowhere.

As the man shuts up, surprised even with your calm tone even with the stress of the failed mission. You gave both Ghost and Soap a warning look. It was all they needed from you to know you could deal with this.

“The intel was perfect a day or two before we headed out for the mission. No one here would realize that their movement and plans would change.” You explained. “We will do our best to fix this.”

“I don’t fucking need you to do your best to fix this!” Graves spat slamming his hand on top of the table that separated the two of you. “I want you to fucking do your job! Or has motherhood and becoming Price’s wife turned you into an incompetent soldier?”

You blinked, genuinely taken aback by the man’s words. In the years since you and your husband had finally allowed everyone to know about your relationship and marriage, never once had anyone say something as malicious as the man did in front of you.

“I am the best soldier before I became a wife or a mother.” You spat raising from your chair to look at the man straight in his eyes. “Do not use my family for your sick plan to hurt me, Commander. You are not the one in control of this mission, you are merely a pawn that we will more than happily discard once the mission is over.”

“Then act like it.” He spat.

You cracked your neck counting to ten trying to calm the bubbling anger fighting to come out. You still had your resentment and apprehension for having Graves participate in the mission. More than just how he and Shepard has betrayed your team back in Las Almas, you never truly trusted a man that had openly admitted that a woman like you did not truly fit in the military. This moment has cemented it.

The meeting was eventually dismissed and you made a beeline towards your husband’s office—rather, your temporary office while you handle most of the paper works while he was unavailable. You had ensured that the door was locked before the first line of tears had fallen from your eyes.

It was frustrating, to have everything you had worked on since an early age and every single sacrificed you had to make for the family you had created with your husband to be wasted by such words. You were reduced to just being your husband’s wife and the mother of his children. You were not acknowledged as the Lieutenant that had spearheaded in Makarov’s capture all those years ago, not acknowledged as the best sniper in your generation, not acknowledged as the best medic of the team. You were nothing more than a woman that served her husband and children.

Your phone dinged and the sight of your mother-in-law sending you a video of your son taking his first step further broke you as you fell to your knees and wept. Everything was falling apart all at once and you didn’t know how to navigate everything on your plate without being questioned.

~

The moment John had opened his eyes, he was greeted by the sight of his beautiful wife sitting beside where he laid. You were buried deeply in what he assumed were the mission report.

The first thing he had noticed about you were your puffy eyes that weren’t just from the lack of sleep but for tears that he was uncertain what had caused it. Even in the pain that came from his wounded shoulder, his moved his arm gingerly and held onto your hand taking you by surprise.

“John!” You gasped placing the paper work you were signing on the opposite chair that was your impromptu table while you stayed with him. “How are you holding up?”

“Alive so that’s good news.” He tried to minimize what had happened. “How long was I out?”

“A week now.” You answered looking at the clock above the bed. “Do you want me to call the doctor?”

He shook his head, not wanting to deal with a doctor just yet. His time with his own wife was more important than having to deal with the coats.

“What happened while I was out?” He inquired knowing it was better to know what was wrong than having himself second guess and annoy you.

“Mission was completed with the few hiccups with what happened to you.” You began with a sigh. “Had to do the debriefing with Graves and Shepard while making sure to keep Soap and Ghost in a tight leash and stop them from lashing out.”

John tried to decipher the deeper meaning from your words. There was something more you weren’t telling him. It was always like this with you, you always try to minimize what hardship that rested on your shoulders even the lashing that was thrown at your direction at the expense of your own feelings.

“What happened?” He repeated hoping it was enough to have you telling him the truth.

“Nothing you needed to worry about, Captain.” You avoided but how you called him Captain when it was just the two of you.

John tried. He truly tried not to worry but even after he was discharged from the infirmary and he continued on with what you had left off from his paper works he noticed the distance that had wedged itself between the two of you.

No longer did you try to stay in his office longer than you usually did. You didn’t even try to approach him unless there was someone else present. Yes, he truly did try not to worry but it was hard when he knew something was certainly wrong.

“What happened during the debriefing?” John couldn’t help himself any longer and the first opportunity that he had caught sight of both Soap and Ghost without you present he took his chance.

He watched the shared look between the duo.

“Still hasn’t told you what happened?” Soap inquired.

“I wouldn’t ask if she had, would I?” John quipped right back.

“Just some misogynistic bullshit being spewed by Graves.” Ghost was quick to end the to and fro that was evidently happen when it comes to Soap.

“Thank you.” John nodded and a plan was already formed in his head for what needed to be done.

~

“My darlings.” You couldn’t help but almost be in tears at the sight of your children in the airport with your mother-in-law.

With the mission over and done with, you and your husband were finally allowed to be home for the next few months—more so with your husband still recovering from his injuries.

You had wrapped your three year old and nearly one year old into your arms peppering them with kisses as your husband greeted his mother. You took a good look at them, so pained by how grown they were in the seven months of not being able to see them.

“Mama!” Your son, Joey mumbled at you with his small hands gripping onto the collar of your shirt.

You heard your husband grunt, bemused by the fact that your son’s first word was you instead of him. Turning to your mother-in-law, Beatrice, you gave her a quick hug appreciating her help with keeping the fort up for you and your husband. You owed her a good vacation with your father-in-law.

“Hope John would be alright now that he’s back. You know how he is with injuries.”

You peered at your husband that was forced by the doctor to wear a sling for the next few weeks while his shoulder heals. You definitely know how much of a baby the man could be every single time he’s injured. He would do anything but rest and heal. You just hope your children could keep him busy for the mean time.

“I’ll deal with him, Mum.” You reassured her with a smile. “Now, what don’t we go and treat you and Dad to some boogie five star dinner like we promised?” You inquired earning a peck from your mother-in-law in the cheek.

Eventually after dinner with your family, you had drove your husband and children back to your home. John had been becoming moodier as the minute passed, with the pain finally kicking in. Now you had to deal with three children that were getting uncomfortable being confined in the care for more than an hour.

Your patience was already laying thin with your husband not helping with your children crying at the backseat. With your children both in the confinements of their car seats and not being able to move as much, they were no help to your growing fouler mood. Your husband was silent in all of this, living in his own world dealing with his own discomfort for having to deal with the bullet hole to his shoulders and his refusal to drink painkiller to deal with it.

“John, the kids. Please.” You finally spoke, hoping he could finally take the hint.

“What do you want me to do?” He snipped and your felt your blood boil and ready to snap and before you could even do, the sudden ring of his phone interrupted you.

He moved slightly from his seat beside you to pull his phone up and immediately answered a call from Laswell, disregarding your request to keep the kids quiet and talked to the woman with your children crying in the background.

Once again, you felt so alone in this situation. It felt so unfair. So fucking unfair to you having to deal with both children, hoping and praying that bribing them with ice cream or sweets would appease them both, but it only made things worse and John demanding you to shut them up was enough for you to stop the car in the middle of the road.

Without another word, you turned the car off, unbuckling your belt and leaving the car slamming the door shut finally silencing both your husband and children.

In the middle of the deserted road, with the cold breeze of the midnight skies you screamed at the top of your lungs. You punched the closes tree that you could see. Punched the fucking trunk over and over as everything you had bottled up has finally overflowed and you were genuinely worried if you were finally going through a psychotic breathe because of it.

In your screams and punch, you halted as the wetness finally fell against your cheeks. You were truly losing your sanity as you sobbed over and over again for everything you had to deal with in the base and mission. Graves’ words that were meant to belittle your incompetence as a soldier dug through your heart more than you had ever thought it would.

You were tired. Just so tired.

When you could barely feel the tears falling anymore, you let out one last pained scream before finally wiping your tears and making your way back into the car. The silence in the car was a relief as you turned the car back on and continued driving.

“Darling…”

“Don’t, John. Just fucking don���t.”

[linkemon]

You're in the wind, I'm in the water (Dan Heng x Reader)

Friendly reminder that English is not my first language. You can check my Masterlists both in English and Polish here. Consider supporting me on Ko-fi. You can also check out my commissions if you're interested.

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ᴅᴀɴ ꜰᴇɴɢ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀ, ᴅᴀɴ ʜᴇɴɢ ɪꜱ ᴡɪɴᴅ. ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴜꜱᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴡɪɴᴅ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇꜱ ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜᴇꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀᴋᴇ ꜱᴜʀꜰᴀᴄᴇ, ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ꜰᴏʀ ɪᴛꜱ ᴏᴡɴ ʀᴇꜰʟᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ. ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴅᴀɴ ʜᴇɴɢ ᴡʜᴏ ʀᴇᴀʟɪᴢᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴀʟᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜ ʜᴇ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴊᴇᴄᴛ ʜɪꜱ ᴘʀᴇᴠɪᴏᴜꜱ ɪɴᴄᴀʀɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ, ʜᴇ ʜᴀᴅ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴏɴ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪᴍ. ᴛʜᴀᴛ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴡᴀꜱ [ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ].

ᴀᴅᴅɪᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ɪɴꜰᴏʀᴍᴀᴛɪᴏɴ: 1. ᴏɴᴇꜱʜᴏᴛ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ ꜱᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ᴇᴠᴇɴᴛꜱ ɪɴ xɪᴀɴᴢʜᴏᴜ ʟᴜᴏꜰᴜ.

Dan Heng felt as if the last few days had passed like a kaleidoscope. A colourful mirage of emotions he didn't want to feel. Events that took all his strength out of him. Memories that weren't his and yet they haunted him like the ghosts of the elders in the Scalegorge Waterscape. 

Only now, sitting by one of the waterfalls, did he get the impression that he finally had a moment of peace, torn away by the clawed claws of an evil fate. The quiet sound of the water was nothing like the voices of the soldiers who had encountered the mara a few days ago. 

It took him a long time to realize a simple fact — he chose a place where HE would come. A typical source of water from which he could draw strength. He smiled bitterly and turned his back. There was no point in running away from here. Even if the beauty surrounding him suddenly turned ugly, leaving an unpleasant aftertaste. 

His stay in Xianzhou Luofu turned his life upside down. The past had long legs. He ran as hard as he could but in the end it was faster. It caught him in a place he didn't want to return to. He wished that the wind playing in the branches of the twisted trees would blow away all thoughts from his head. Especially the one he had doubts about. 

[Reader]. She flooded his mind like a wave. He rejected his past. He drew a line between himself and Dan Feng. The title of Imbibitor Lunae was no longer his. He was sure Bailu would do just fine. She kept Luofu safe. He left all the residents in good hands. He told everyone his name was Dan Heng. Many still saw him as a previous incarnation. And even though it hurt like old wounds, he rejected their opinions. The express crew were his family and they didn't care about the sins of who he once was. Only their opinion mattered. At least that's what he thought.

Jing Yuan, although he wasn't like Blade, stuck to his previous name quite stubbornly. At least he was aware that the general was doing it out of habit, not out of pure hatred. Something he couldn't say about the old Yingxing. [Reader] was neither of them. She called him Dan Heng from the very beginning. Sometimes he wondered if they met after all of this, if she would still hold on to it. If she hadn't stood next to Sushang that day and met him first as an archivist, would she still have had reservations? Although he wasn't Dan Feng in her mouth, he was Dan Feng in her eyes. He had seen it in every conversation they had ever had since the truth came out and she managed to recognize him. 

Her eyes traced the pointy ears and followed the emerald horns even when they weren't there. She involuntarily talked about the things that Dan Feng loved. She recalled the times when he was still next to her, becoming embarrassed rather quickly when she realized what she was doing. He would interrupt anyone else who was doing it. This double standard only existed with her and it was eating him from the inside. 

Dan Heng bit his lip. He was like a gust that sometimes met the water. He rushed over the surface and saw his reflection but he was not a lake. What a strange feeling it was to be and not be loved at the same time. [Reader] loved his reflection. He could show it for a short while for her but no matter what he did, he couldn't become water because he was wind. 

It wasn't that he wanted to become Dan Feng. He hated his previous incarnation. Who he was and what he did. His predecessor followed him step by step, reminding him of himself and not letting him be who he wanted. But why did [Reader] have to be in love with him? In that hidden part of himself that he never wanted to become. 

This love was like a sea current. The swift current seemed to carry him away without any hope. And maybe because it resembled water, he wondered if it was his feelings, or maybe the remnants of the attachment of a former self that he had tried so hard to let go of. After all, they had known each other for such a short time, and he, as he deeply wanted to believe, was not a man who would give his feelings to anyone he came across. On the other hand, March immediately noticed that he was in love and said it was obvious. So maybe it was him after all? 

Dan Heng from [Reader] didn't sound like Dan Feng. Even if it was hiding behind it. Maybe he could pretend to be like him? He turned back towards the waterfall and looked at his reflection. Ripples in the water obscured his vision.

He wouldn't. He didn't want to be him. Never. Even for her. 

So maybe she could pretend? After all, he looked similar and had a fraction of his former power... 

He shook his head. Not at this price. Neither of them would be happy. 

At least he had memories. Even if they weren't his. Glimmers of light amidst the dark void of forgotten days. Sometimes they came back involuntarily. He hated the echo of Dan Feng's laughter, even though he felt like the joy was his own, but he loved [Reader's] laughter. Her silhouette looming somewhere under his eyelids. The same one that came back to him when they sat on the stairs after sunset after a hard day's work. The warmth of her lips, once so close, now within reach but at the same time eons away. How easy it was to lose himself in this old reality that was not his own. In that which interspersed his nightmares with sweet peace.

But these were stories of bygone days from several hundred years ago and he had to constantly remind himself that they did not belong to him. 

The sound of familiar footsteps sounded on the path. The wind brought the sound of trampled leaves. He didn't need to turn around to know who was standing there. Of course she figured out where to look for him. This was the place HE would came to. 

— Dan Feng. 

This was the first time something like this had happened. Until now, she had always been careful not to use his pre-reincarnation name. 

Maybe it was the sight of him surrounded by a familiar waterfall. Or one of the memories gnawed by the teeth of time, which now came to life in her eyes. He couldn't find it among the dark depths of his memory. If it existed, it belonged only to her. It was probably even better that way. This made "Dan Heng, not Dan Feng " easier to leave his mouth.

He wasn't ready for the regret that appeared on [Reader's] face. Nor for a tear that gathered in the corner of the eye, only to quickly disappear under a hard-blinking eyelid in confusion. However, he did not expect the feelings that spread around his heart even more. Jealousy, sadness and nostalgia of days gone by. He never found out if they really belonged to him. They were floating somewhere on the transparent surface of water, touched by the gust of wind.

[mvrkieboo]

The Original Ending for Old Bloodhounds

lmao this is totally because of this ask right here.

so, lemme tell y'all how the original ending of old bloodhounds would've been like before i scraped it because it was too much even for me lmao

once yoonsu's had his fun of isolating her from the people she loves, he's going to kill her and commit suicide in an isolated spot, just to really drive the nail that she's always going to be alone with him, even when all that's left of them is their rotting corpse.

he kills her and kills himself, and y/n's friends and family are going to report her as a missing person because she's missing her classes and not seen anywhere else anymore. then, a few weeks* after, some poor hiker and his dog stumble upon y/n's and yoonsu's corpse. mind you, yoonsu executes this during the winter, so in that thick layer of snow, y/n's and yoonsu's bodies are perfectly preserved.

only then are they going to find out that junyoung wasn't junyoung, but actually cha yoonsu. especially because authorities in gangnam already uncovered the original junyoung's body. dna testing proved that the corpse beside y/n's was yoonsu. then as the authorities investigate this fucked up case, they'd find the messages y/n and yoonsu shared and the blackmail material yoonsu had over her. detective do kyungsoo who had helped you in gangnam gets involved in this case.

as detective do explains to y/n's loved ones what really happened to y/n, it would dawn on them that they had a hand in making y/n's worst nightmare come true—for the people she loved to abandon her once again when she needed them most.

jaehyun has a breakdown that would result in his debut as a soloist singer be put on hold. him and his dad were inconsolable, but he eventually realises he can't throw away his career as a singer because y/n had only ever hoped for him to become one and achieve his lifelong dream. didn't she die for this? the public notes that he's not as easygoing anymore, but rather closed off.

mark takes a break from studying, his world is put on hold now that he knows just how much y/n suffered up until her murder. jaehyun drags him in to get therapy, and mark only lets him because jae's his best friend. he always has y/n on his mind. once he actually graduates, all of the songs he helps produce and write with jae are about her. jae knows this. all of the sad songs jae created with mark couldn't be sang live he'd just choke up on those lyrics anyway

geonwoo and woojin were shut off from the world for a while. once they do get back on their feet and continue their work in helping loanshark victims evade their debt collectors, they'd always see her ghost in the backseat of their vehicles. they swore off in personally fostering any loanshark victims after y/n's death. they couldn't bear thinking that they could be replacing her with someone else.

yangyang, xiaojun, and aeri...yangyang—afraid of losing anyone else after just how brutally y/n was ripped away from his life—hired xiaojun and aeri into his start-up tech company. their ai assistant for their app is named after y/n, and even the model suspiciously resembles her. as if that's not enough, the three of them immortalise y/n by creating a foundation named after her that aims to help troubled teens all around the nation.

y/n's and junyoung's ashes are kept within the main jeong household, deciding that their resting space should be among y/n's family and kept together, and papa jeong keeps them both safe and clean daily. geonwoo and woojin comes and visits the jeong household when they can to visit y/n, yuno had left a framed childhood photo of him and y/n together near her ashes, mark always gifts her new phone charms when he can. yangyang, xiaojun, and aeri had gifted her a plush version of their app's ai assistant.

y/n's mom always visits the spot where y/n was murdered, leaving flowers there every month.

everyone eats ice cream during the first day of the fall season in y/n's memory.

they'll never stop mourning over her. each and every step of their life moving forward is haunted by how it could've been if she was still alive.

[geekforhorror]

Hi!! Could you write something where after Anakin turns to the dark side fem!reader (who he’s in a relationship with) goes with him. She doesn’t necessarily agree with it but doesn’t want to leave him so she follows him. She begins feeling depressed because Anakin stops paying attention to her and practically emotionally abandons her. They eventually get into a fight where she plans to leave him because nothing has changed but he promises ge will change back for her.

ghost of you

pairing: sith!anakin x fem!reader

warning(s): mental health issues, emotional abandonment, mention of dark side, fighting, sadness, kissing, and fluff at the end.

word count: 1.3k

a/n: did i base the title off the song “ghost of you”? yes i did.

He promised things would be different.

After Order 66, You and Anakin had fled to your hometown of Naboo where you guys would hide from the Republic and whatever was left of the almost extinct Jedi order. To say the thought of being discovered didn’t scare you would be a complete lie. You had gone with him for one sole reason— you didn’t want to leave him. He was the love of your life, the only person who understood you, and the only one who sacrificed everything to have a better life with you.

But recently, you had been plagued with uneasy feelings about the entire situation. See, you were never on board with abandoning everything and everyone in your old life, but once Anakin had carried out Order 66, he made it very clear that the two of you couldn’t remain on Coruscant when there was a warrant for his arrest. You could see the difference in his eyes when he first told you about what would happen if you stayed. Agreeingly, you went along with him and now you were stuck with the harsh reality of what he did. He had promised you that the two of you would rule the galaxy, but you didn’t want that. You didn’t want that at all. All you wanted was his love and nothing more, but he seemed to forget about your needs and wants.

He used to touch you whether it was hugging you or making love to you all hours of the night. Now he barely even kissed you. The romantic date nights had been replaced with him working on his plans for his new empire while shutting you out. He didn’t even ask how your day was anymore.

There was no denying your state of mind had been a sliver of what it used to be. You were once filled with joy, hope, and most importantly— love. But now you were filled with feelings of hopelessness. It was because of Anakin. He had been so focused on building his new empire that he had left you behind at home for hours before returning home late at night. Unbeknownst to him, you had spent those hours crying in despair. You wanted your old husband back. The one you fell in love with back on Coruscant.

Tonight had been like every other night. All alone in the living room with no one to talk to besides yourself. It was really depressing to say the least. This was what your life had come to. Despite not being the biggest fan about all this, the thought of him being gone for countless hours scared you to death. You still loved him after everything he did. You didn’t know how you could still be with him, but here you were.

All of a sudden, you heard the door open and you knew he was home. You looked over at your husband with sad eyes, only to see that he wasn’t doing the same. In that moment, you felt yourself reach rock bottom. You could take everything else, but this? This was a new low for you. It hurt you enough knowing he didn’t touch you or talk to you anymore, but not even being met with his eyes? That hurt you more than anything ever did. You don’t know if you were feeling anger or sadness in this moment. Maybe it was both, but it was enough for you to finally say something.

“Maker, Anakin! Just look at me!” you shout with a crack in your voice.

You almost miss the way he looked at you in disbelief, but not quite. It takes him a second to gather his thoughts and words, trying to figure out what the hell this was about. “What the hell?!” he replies, still taken aback by your harsh tone.

“Don’t play dumb with me, Anakin! You know damn well what this is about!” you reply, the anger overlapping any feelings of sadness you previously had.

“Do I?” he replies sarcastically.

“You better know, for your sake,” you say.

“How am I supposed to know?” he asks, sounding annoyed.

“That’s exactly my point, Anakin! You don’t know where I’m coming from because you never talk to me anymore! I’m your wife, for makers sake!” you say, tears now protruding from your swollen eyes.

“I do talk to you!” he counters.

“You’re so ignorant it hurts,” you say with a scoff.

“Oh really? Go on and tell me what I’m so ignorant about,” he says.

“You’re ignorant about the fact that you don’t talk to me, touch me, or even look at me anymore,” you say.

“That’s not true,” he says defensively.

“It isn’t, huh? Then tell me what I did in the past week,” you say. You can see him struggling to come up with a sufficient answer that’s also honest and true, but he has nothing.

“That’s what I thought,” you retort.

“Listen I’m sorry about that. I’ve just been busy,” he says.

“Busy?! That’s what you call busy? You haven’t given me one ounce of love since we came here!”

“You’re overthinking this, angel,” he says.

“Don’t ‘angel’ me. You gave me a half assed apology and you expect me to be ok with that? God damn it Anakin! I deserve better than this!” you say with tears starting to form from how angry you were.

“What are you saying?” he says with a bit of fear in his voice.

“We’re done,” you say harshly before you start to walk away from him. Anakin’s heart sank with sadness as reality came back to him. It had taken you threatening to leave him to finally come out of a trance. He couldn’t lose you. You were the only person in his life that mattered and it had been that way for a long time. Not even the emperor mattered that much. You were the only reason he stayed alive. You were too special.

Before you can get far, you feel your dress being dragged harshly. You looked behind you only to see Anakin on his knees, tugging at the skirt of your dress.

“Please, angel. Don’t leave me!” he said with a shaky voice.

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t,” you say with a scoff.

“I’ll kill the emperor!” he says abruptly which makes you stop in your tracks.

“I don’t believe you,” you counter.

“I would do anything for you, love. Just tell me what and I will!” he begs.

“I want you to turn back into the man I loved and married,” you say with a trembling voice. “You’re a sith lord, for makers sake! Has it ever occurred to you that I don’t want to live this life? I want my husband back,”

“I promise I will. Just give me one more chance, baby,” he asks of you.

You were conflicted. You hated the way this new man made you feel recently, but he was still your husband and you loved him. The new man had died when you broke through his barriers and spoke to him in a way neither of you knew was possible. All that mattered was that it worked. You wanted nothing more than to give him room to grow and learn from his many mistakes if he loved you so much. The only thing worse than being in this situation was living your life without him. The love of your life.

“Get up, Ani,” you say, now cupping his face. He does as you say and is finally back on your level. Once he is, you tenderly kiss him on his lips. It’s a rather foreign feeling after all of these months of being touch starved. The two of you find harmony in the kiss and you feel the galaxy become so little around you guys.

���Maker, I’m such a fool for you, Ani,” you mumble against his lips.

“So am I, darling,” he says back.

Things finally felt right.

[accio-victuuri]

Somebody Else’s Arms : Timeline + Analysis ✍🏻 and a tiny bit of clowning…

as what the title of this post says, let’s talk about this song and everything that goes with it. i didn’t expect him to actually do something like this but i’m not mad about it. there were already some rumors about it before the release, which personally didn’t come by my weibo feed so as soon as the poster teaser was out, everyone had their own thoughts:

1. It might be related to intercross, because of the water imagery and angsty title.

2. It’s a song he bought and at the time people were pointing to an existing track by cool heads prevail. and others were saying it may just be the same name.

3. some cpfs getting nervous cause it seems to be a breakup song, as if you all didn’t know he and xz love bittersweet songs!

4. connected to #2 cause a cpf station sister commented on this song before we knew anything like she had an idea that this will be performed all along.

AND NOW THAT THE WE HAVE LISTENED TO IT, it is a completely different one from the track people were referring to. oh well. rumors are rumors.

yibo-official first released the teaser for it at 16:00 which to me relates to the “fact” that 16 is bobo’s favorite number. also the play on words and how they associate with each other is so interesting SEA = somebody else’s arms then using that as an overall theme like deep in the sea. not to be that person — but it’s so xiao zhan.

then the hair reminded people of his style @ tencent starlight in 2019 with xz. but i have to say, when the douyin video was released, it made more sense because of the 80s vibe he ( along with other yh family stars ) was going for. the clothes and the hair definitely complete the look. i mean come on, he already had the vincent vega hair.

the similarity in the caption, once again! xzs 🤝 ybo

Now let’s move on the song itself ⬇️⬇️⬇️

i can only find information on this songwriter, so i guess it’s true that he bought it. the lyrics is actually giving ghost by justin bieber which is a personal fave. it’s like acknowledging you love someone but they are gone now. also it’s interesting that he chose an english song! i’m gonna be a totally delusional fan here and think that this is because he is becoming more and more popular with the international stage so he chose this to connect more.

the choreography is also by his fave Franklin Yu who also did the dance for Rules of My World and Burn It All Down. backed up by Made in V which is a usual group that collaborates with him and XZ. 💚❤️

i think we are all surprised cause it’s in ENGLISH. like i understand if the chorus is, but as a whole. wow.

You're still in my heart

But you're in somebody else arms

You are still in my mind

But you are in somebody else's life

A part of you got left inside my chest

I try and I try to forget

You are still in my heart

But you are in somebody else arms

Memories that we said we made

Memories I can't never let go

How do they torture me the same

Memories that we won't even know

Let me out

Na na na oh My love my love

Na na na oh Let me out

Na na na oh My love my love

A part of you got left inside my chest

I try and I try to forget

You are still in my heart

But you are in somebody else arms somebody else arms

the lyrics are so heartbreaking 💔 and as i said, something we know will appeal to yibo. and as an artist, or any kind of creative i feel like this kind of emotion connects well to the audience. it’s the perfect choice! but that doesn’t mean it don’t hurt!

i know there might be some part of the fandom who will look at this and be like — oh they broke up! “see how sad his face was performing?!” and well.. dude, he is performing this song and singing those lyrics.. what should he do? smile? lol. his dance is an interpretation of it, did you see that bit where he was alone and everyone had partners? In the meantime he was all alone and cradling no one 😭😭😭

it’s a performance. no matter how much we think everything has a personal connection.

anyway, it’s beautiful. his voice is amazing. i’m just imagining xz totally lovin this song and putting this on repeat! 🎧

and oh, the style of his clothes look like there are XX on it. hahahaha! a CPN fave!

DISCLAIMER: this is all the information available at the time of writing. I will post separate ones if ever new information comes out related to this song. 🎶

[sufferu]

So I have this one-shot I’m currently working on that isn’t quite done yet. Here’s a short scene.

Ficlet from One Good Deed A Day: As Graves Do

The Order of the Knights had not gotten off without scrutiny either. Although the pressure was mainly on the Candidates, the fact that some of the versions of the story being spread included their refusal to help was painting them as a bitter, vindictive group which would punish a youth for speaking out of turn by leaving him and his loved ones to die. It was remarkably similar to the situation that Julius had desperately attempted to steer everyone away from, but his efforts had seemingly been for naught.

Not that he really cared, right now. There was something more important at hand.

“I’m not sure you would have wanted me, of all people, to bring you flowers,” Julius admitted. “Our meeting with one another was far from pleasant, especially for you. I don’t even know what kind of flowers you like. …But I thought you might appreciate it if someone you met once were to visit you here, even if it were me.”

Natsuki Subaru didn’t have any family. His only known home had been at the Mather’s Estate, which was now in ruins, and nearly all of those who had known enough about him in life to properly grieve his passing were now dead. But the thought of leaving the boy’s grave unattended to made Julius’ heart ache, especially after he had tried so, so hard for the sake of everyone else.

He had been buried alongside all the other former residents of Irlam, right next to his Lady at the far side of the graveyard that had taken the place of the ghost town. It was beautiful, now, full of flowers and full of life. This was thanks to Reinhard — not just because it was the swing of his sword that had put it in motion, but because he now regularly tended to the garden that had sprung up in its wake. Nobody had fought Felt when she had angrily laid claim to the land left behind by the half-elf candidate and her self-proclaimed knight, mostly because any of the other three candidates trying to do anything of the sort would have seemed tactless (at the VERY best) within the context of the tale that had been spreading around the country.

“You’ll be happy to know that the Order has been going through a lot of trouble thanks to you,” he said wryly, gently and carefully setting the bouquet against the headstone. “Everyone’s taking their refusal to assist you in saving your village from the Witch Cult as a sign of personal grudges getting in the way. Somehow that tantrum of yours got turned around on US, because now we’re all being painted as the sort of weak-willed men who would use a boy throwing a tantrum as a reason to withhold from him our aid. Is this your way of getting back at me, I wonder…?”

Nobody could remember exactly what had happened when Subaru had come to the knights for help. But only one person had come to them seeking assistance against an upcoming Witch Cult attack in Irlam, and there was really only one person who that warning could have come from, so it wasn’t difficult to conclude what must have happened from there.

“I wish you had seen it fit to ask ME for help,” Julius lamented quietly. “You were asking everyone you could, right? If you had just come and asked me, maybe I could have…”

Anastasia had seen no reason to give her aid, with Subaru’s clumsy negotiation presenting her with a situation in which she would gain nothing and risk everything — on top of his testimony being unreliable, and his mannerisms being immature at best and somewhat crazed at worst. Julius would not have gone against her wishes. But if Subaru had just come to him FIRST…

“Well, there’s no point in dwelling on what could have been, is there?”

What could have been. What if one of the candidates Subaru had begged for help had agreed to lend their aid? What if the knights had listened when he came asking for them to save his loved ones? What if the White Whale hadn’t interrupted his scramble to find help among a band of traveling merchants, sending all of them scattering as it set its sights on Subaru and Subaru alone? What if the Beast of the End had seen it fit to spare the souls of Irlam Village from his vicious, agonized rampage following the death of Lady Emilia, deep in the woods?

Perhaps that last “what if” was the worst of them all.

“You were really close.” Julius’ voice cracked. “You almost saved them. Not— Not Emilia, maybe, but the people of the nearby village…if circumstances were different, they would all have lived.”

It wasn’t completely true, but there was an element of truth in what he said. Irlam village had not shown any evidence of Witch Cult activities, with the bodies of the cultists instead found clustered in the area immediately surrounding Subaru and Emilia’s dead figures. All evidence pointed to them having successfully evaded the upcoming attack that Subaru had predicted — likely due to Subaru’s own interference, which had led the cultists deep into the woods. But they hadn’t been able to avoid the frost: a frost which had not just killed the cultists, but also all the surrounding wildlife, all the people within the village, and — as an autopsy proved — even Subaru himself.

(The Witch Cult, the Royal Candidates, the Kingdom’s Knights, the White Whale, and his very own ally in the Beast of the End. How a singular person attempting to do the right thing could find themselves opposed by so many parties all at the same time would have been morbidly funny to think about, if the reminder of how Subaru’s story had ended wasn’t so sobering.)

Julius took a deep breath, steadying himself. “We believe you now,” he said. “It’s far too late for that and we all know it, but — we believe you. I do hope that there’s some consolation there.”

The grave said nothing, as graves do.