#everyone boo this drawing right now

[injuritwirls]

Wow… what… cute … little guys… this is so… awesome sauce🦝. (I’m concealing my burning hatred for this stupid drawing that i spent too long on and just got really lazy on bc i didn’t likeit so dont pay close attention pls PLEASEPLSPPSLS especially dont Look at the clothes i shaded them Last and i was eepy AND NOW YOUR LOOKING AT THEM ARENT YOU I SEE YOU LOOK AWAY RIGHR NOW OR ELSE) also guys?? Ipad kid morty cannon?? He’s so me I’m also curly hair with crusty ipad

ANNYYWWAAYY FOR THE NEXT WEEK IM GONNA BE WORKING ON THE 3 REQUESTS I GOT SO EXPECT A BUNCH OF ART HOPEFULLY <3<3 yes i know i said I’d do 2 but… I’m a people pleaser AND THE AUDIENCE MUST BE HEARD!!!

[carolperkinsexgirlfriend]

can you see the stars in your dreams (and do they have a lot to say about me) - Part 11

Or: a secret Admirer AU

PART 1 || PART 2 || PART 3 || PART 4 || PART 5 || PART 6 || PART 7 || PART 8 || PART 9 || PART 10

Steve waits until everyone’s gone home to open the letter. Chrissy had ribbed him over not sharing but, no matter how supportive she is, she just doesn’t get it—she can’t. No matter what she’s shared, her and Jeff are clearly dating. And even if they hadn’t been, Jeff likes girls. The worst thing that would’ve happened is him turning her down.

With Eddie? The worst thing that could happen is total annihilation.

And Steve’s never been good at holding himself back. He cares fast, and he cares hard, and he can never quite stop, no matter what changes, or how much distance he puts between himself and the other person. Look at Nancy, and Tommy, and Carol, and his parents, and every single relationship he’s had where he’s all in, and the other person never meets him. He doesn’t even need halfway, hell, he’d take a quarter.

But even that’s never how it works out. If there’s one thing he’s learned, it’s that Steve Harrington is too much, always.

So, if his fingers shake as he opens the letter, who can blame him?

But, inside is everything he could have ever asked for—Because you’re it, baby. He caresses the words, fingers trembling, heart shuddering in his chest to a beat that sounds a lot like, “maybe, maybe, maybe.”

He knows it’s stupid. This letter isn’t for Steve, not really. It’s Chrissy’s face Eddie pictured when he wrote it, Chrissy’s lips he imagined kissing, Chrissy’s hand he imagined holding. But, it’s hard to remember, when there’s such longing on the page in front of him.

He doesn’t know what to say, thoughts running too fast to pick them out and write them down. He tries, pen stuttering over the page in half-formed sentences, until he’s left with:

  Eddie —

  You don’t want to know what I

  Someone has loved you. I love

  I’ll take anything you

  Fuck

Hee crumples the letter up into a ball, and tosses it across the room toward the trash bin. He shoots, he misses, he lays down with all the lights still on.

Steve stares down at Eddie’s letter, helpless in the face of the bubbling hope, unwilling to squash it. He folds the letter back up and puts it under his pillow, hoping for dreams, just like Eddie had said.

He doesn’t.

Steve’s tired the next morning, zoning out during class, and shuffling through the halls like a zombie. Chrissy keeps sending him worried looks, and even Robin asks if he’s okay in Mrs. Click’s class, which she was right, they do share.

Steve tells her he’s just tired, and she drops it, but there’s a sad, knowing smile on her face.

It happens at lunch. Eddie jumps up on his lunch table, boots thudding loudly against its metal surface, drawing all eyes in the room toward him. Everyone looks away, familiar with his tabletop rants by now, but Steve can’t look away.

Eddie’s magnetic when he’s like this, a black hole swirling everything up in its path. Steve doesn’t want to miss a thing, barely blinks as Eddie begins the familiar walk across the Hellfire table.

“Forced conformity, folks—it’s what’s killing the kids!” he cries, clapping fast to punctuate the sentence. Across Steve’s own table, Tommy boos, gaining momentum when the people around him laugh and join in. “Oh, don’t act so high and mighty, Hagan, you’re the worst of all.”

He’s grinning, but it’s not the dimpled one. He’s just baring his teeth, a predator scenting blood. “You’re all so focused on shooting balls in laundry baskets, like that’s all there is, but guess what? You’re going to be a washed-up has-been before you’re even out of this school.”

He takes a few steps forward, eyes straying from Tommy farther up the table, making it clear he’s talking to all of them. “You don’t realize that daddy’s money’s gonna dry up, and you’ll be left with a wife and three kids you don’t even like, reliving the old glory days like they were even worth remembering.”

“Come say that to my face, Munson!” Tommy cries, standing up from the table as the rest of them egg him on.

Eddie makes a little rock and roll symbol and smirks, like that’s exactly what he wanted Tommy to say. “And you know what? That’s all you’ll deserve for the shit you’ve pulled. A sad lonely life with your sad flaccid dick.”

And suddenly, he’s looking right at Steve, gaze piercing straight through Steve and into his soft, squishy underbelly. There’s blood in the water, and by Eddie’s laugh, he can taste it. “You’ve earned it,” he says, not even blinking, his eyes so intense Steve can’t breath with it. “After all, once a jock, always a jock.”

Chrissy links their fingers and squeezes his hand beneath the table. Steve blinks, spell broken as he squeezes her back in thanks. He looks down at his remaining chicken nuggets, appetite gone.

“You okay?” Chrissy asks, barely audible with all the continued heckling.

Steve glances up just in time to watch Eddie jump down from the table and plop his ass down like none of it happened at all. He’s laughing as Jeff and Gareth pat his back, but he looks deflated, like the whole spectacle took everything out of him.

“I will be,” Steve replies, pushing his lunch tray away.

If nothing else, he has something to write now.

*** 

Eddie can’t get the look on Harrington’s face out of his mind. He’d been at the top of his game, riling the jocks up enough that Hagan had jumped up like a jack-in-the-box. But, then he’d looked at Harrington, and it’d all gone wrong.

The guy was drooping into himself, mouth down-turned, eyes like a kicked puppy. Eddie stuttered, got caught up in him, something unnameable stuck in his throat. Eddies doesn’t even know what he’d said after that, couldn’t hear himself think much less speak, until Harrington finally looked down at the tabletop and their eye contact broke. 

Now he’s stumbling over his words, trying not to even look Harrington’s way as he finishes off his speech. It lacks the usual oomph, but Eddie doesn’t care; he just wants the whole thing to end.

Eddie stumbles down into his chair, shuddering through his smile as Gareth and Doug elbow him in the side, ribbing him good-naturedly. He chokes out a laugh, and doesn’t look at the jock’s table for the rest of lunch.

The next time he sees Harrington, there’s another complication to contend with in the form of Robin Buckley, best known for her proficiency on the trumpet and quirky outfits. And now? She’s best known for attaching herself like a barnacle to Harrington’s side.

Except, if she was a barnacle, Harrington might at least try to shake her off. But, no. He just smiles at her, and whispers with her, as she inserts herself between Chrissy and Harrington like she belongs there.

Chrissy, for her part, seems to like the girl as well.

Eddie doesn’t get it, can’t comprehend what the hell’s happening, and it makes something squirmy and viscous sink into his stomach every time Buckley inserts herself between the pair, every time they smile at her.

But, they still stop to talk to him in between classes, so Eddie tries to drop it.

“It just doesn’t make sense!” Eddie cries, phone clutched to his ear, not even letting Gareth get a word out before he’s continuing the conversation Jeff had rudely interrupted by showing up to lunch. “What the hell is Harrington’s deal?”

“Dude, you’re like, obsessed,” Gareth replies, clearly talking around a mouthful of whatever after-school snack he’d chosen this time.

“Is he trying to date every girl in school at the same time?” he whines, yanking on his hair hard enough that his scalp tingles.

“You’re just jealous,” he replies, and that same squirmy feeling makes Eddie wriggle his whole body, like there’s a chill in the air.

Is the heater on the fritz again?

“Of who?” Eddie screeches before quieting down, peeking into the living room to make sure Uncle Wayne hasn’t stirred. He hasn’t, but Eddie still keeps his voice lowered as he continues hissing into the receiver. “Of Harrington? Don’t be absurd.”

Gareth laughs, “I don’t know, man, but this whole thing is just getting weird.”

“I know, right? What are they up to?” Eddie asks, ignoring Gareth’s muttered “not what I meant,” like he hadn’t said anything at all.

He never figures it out because Buckley never comes around—not to band practice, or Hellfire, or any of the other times Chrissy and Eddie (and Harrington) are in the same place. Eddie should be relieved. He’s not.

Everything is spiraling out of his control.

But, the letters keep coming, and Eddie keeps devouring them

  Eddie —

  I really liked your tabletop speech this week, even though you made fun of the jocks. Some of them definitely deserve it. Do you hate all of them, or just the bullies?

  You laughed, but it wasn’t your real laugh like when Mr. Danver accidentally said ‘orgasm’ instead of ‘organism’. I love your laugh, I thought about it all day. Kind of like when your favorite song gets stuck in your head.

  I know I’ve said it before, but I do really like you. But, if you knew me, I don’t think you’d like me. It’s okay, though. I’m stupid like that—always putting my whole heart into people who don’t feel the same.

  I’m sorry, this is probably not the letter you hoped to get. I’ll be better next time, promise.

  Yours,

  Your Secret Admirer

  P.S. Put your response in the World Atlas, the long one that they have to put sideways on the bookshelf (because no matter where you are, I’ll always think of you).

They all make something flutter within him like his lungs are growing wings and flapping themselves out of his body entirely. Even as it leaves him breathless and aching, he wants more of it, longs for it.

It’s just—she sounds so sad, lately, like she’s losing hope in this at all.

All Eddie wants to do is reassure her. So, he keeps writing back, pulling his heart off his sleeve and flinging it down on the page for Chrissy to read, hoping he’ll somehow see those same feelings reflected in her eyes.

He never does.

So, he pokes; he wheedles; he pines for a girl on a page that never quite stands before him. And he pours it all onto the page.

  Secret Admirer,

  I don’t think it’s all jocks—you’re too nice for that. But even you have to admit that a lot of the jocks are only doing it to be at the top of the food chain. Guys like Carver and Harrington Hagaon? They don’t even care about sports, they just want peons to fawn over them. But, there’s people like you, too, so maybe more of them are better than I expect.

  I can’t imagine knowing who you are and not liking you. You’re the nicest girl I know. You don’t have to tell me who you are, but if you do? I promise, it’ll all be okay.

  Yours, always,

  Eddie

  P.S. You don’t have to “be better,” baby. I just want you to be you. That will always be enough for a guy like me.

It’s not enough—something is breaking open in him that words on the page can’t quite mend.

“I’m going to ask her out,” Eddie says once Harrington and Chrissy have left the latest Hellfire session, still inexplicably coming despite never playing.

Jeff chokes on his sip of soda, coughing harshly enough that some of it comes out of his mouth and splatters onto the table.

“Gross, dude,” Doug says, but still pats his back like he’s burping a baby.

“Are you serious?” Gareth asks, tone disbelieving.

Eddie makes crazy eyes at him, trying to psychically beam all his thoughts into Gareth’s head like, yes I’m serious, and, you know about the notes, why are you looking at me like that, and, what the hell else am I supposed to do to crack this mystery wide open?

“That is such a bad idea,” Jeff cuts in once he’s got his coughing under wraps.

Eddie whips towards him, scowling at his best friend as he replies, “you’re just jealous.”

Jeff sighs, heaves himself out of his chair, says a quick, “whatever, dude,” and walks out of the room without a backward glance.

“Aren’t you his ride?” Doug asks.

Eddie flaps his hand in dismissal and replies, “forget about him,” despite his gut sinking down into his boots at Jeff’s words.

“Well, how are you going to do it?” Gareth asks, the only one of his friends to seem even remotely excited.

Eddie keeps flapping his hand and replies, “never you mind.”

That even gets Gareth to scoff, knowing Eddie well enough to know that means he’s got nothing.

But there’s a thought niggling away at his brain: why not finish this thing the same way it had begun?

On his way out the door, he drops his latest letter to Chrissy into the trash bin and doesn’t look back. He’s got a new letter to write.

*** 

“You know this is juvenile, right?” Jeff asks.

Chrissy pulls the world atlas off the shelf with a roll of her eyes.

Her and Steve had fought about him picking up the letters alone, and Chrissy had won the way she always does when it comes to matters of his safety. He’s sulking in the parking lot now, waiting for her to retrieve it for him.

But, there’s no letter behind the cover. She flips through the whole book, then shakes it, pages flapping wildly, to see if anything falls out. Nothing does. No note, at least not yet.

Steve will be disappointed.

“They’re boys, of course it’s juvenile,” Chrissy says, turning away from the shelf to make pointed eye contact.

If boys are stupid, Jeff is the stupidest of them all. She thinks she can see a tinge of red to his dark cheeks that makes her smile. Chrissy turns away to pick up her book bag where she’d left it on the closet table.

“There’s no letter?” Jeff asks, sounding surprised.

Chrissy sighs, responding, “not yet. I’ll have to check back tomorrow.”

Steve will be crushed. He’s been weird about the letters since he’d begun writing the first drafts alone. Even with the minor polishing Chrissy puts on them after, they’re Steve’s words and feelings, no matter what Eddie thinks. And it shows in the way he takes them home and pours over them for days before slinking back to her with the original letter and his response, cheeks rosy as she fixes his spelling errors.

“Eddie’s planning on asking you out, you know,” Jeff says.

There’s a clatter behind one of the shelves, but Chrissy barely notices. “He said that?” she asks, turning sharply toward him, hand still clutching her book bag. 

Jeff nods, lips pursed. God, what are they going to do? This whole thing has spiraled so far out of either of their control. Chrissy had known when she offered that there was a chance Eddie would catch on—that he’d see her leaving a note, or catch her picking one up.

Better her than Steve, she’d thought then. No matter the awkward situation she’s found herself in, she still thinks that, even more so now. Better her than Steve. Steve, who’s proven himself kinder than she ever imagined, who would be run out of town, her ex-boyfriend at the head of the mob.

Chrissy can hear someone shuffling out of sight, feet shuffling on carpet far too close for comfort, so she steps closer to Jeff and lowers her voice. 

“Do you know when?” Chrissy asks, anxiety leaching into her. She needs to talk to Steve. Flirting with Eddie is one thing, but going on a date with him? Going out with him? That’s a whole other monster.

And then, of course, there’s Jeff.

“No, he hasn’t told me anything,” he replies, something small and hurt in his voice.

Chrissy’s never had a best friend, but Steve’s given her a little taste of it, and she’d be hurt if he didn’t tell her something like this.

“He’s probably embarrassed,” Chrissy says, aching to reach out and touch, but they’re in public, and Jason could be lurking behind any corner; the last thing she wants is to put a target on another person she cares about’s back. “You’re still his best friend.”

“Yeah, maybe,” he sighs, but when she bumps their shoulders together gently, his lips quirk up.

He smiles over at her, bumping their shoulders together himself as he asks, “drive me home?” as if it isn’t a foregone conclusion. “And stay for dinner?”

That gives her pause. She can feel her cheeks flushing. Despite taking the next step in their relationship, Jeff’s never invited her in, not where his parents and brother are. They haven’t even really discussed what they are, not with this whole secret admirer thing hanging over their heads like the Sword of Damocles.

But she wants to. She wants to hold his hand in the halls, go to his house for study dates and dinner, kiss him somewhere where they don’t have to be furtive.

It’s all stolen moments with Jeff, kisses and conversations made in haste when all she wants to do is linger. So, she says, “yes, please,” and bounces out into the parking lot.

Steve isn’t there, and neither is his car.

“Maybe he went home?” Jeff asks, but he looks just as unsure as she feels.

“We’ll call him when we get to your house,” she asserts. She’s relieved when all he does is nod and follow her to her car. 

She’s got a best friend to find.

*** 

Robin knows something’s gone wrong as soon as she sees that dangerous gleam in Carver’s eyes. She knows whatever it is, it’s about to go catastrophically wrong when she follows his line of sight to where Eddie stands chatting away with one of his friends.

Still, she stands frozen, watching in breathless horror as Eddie waves goodbye to his friend, that familiar happy grin on his face as he slides into the driver’s seat of his van. Heavy music blares from the rolled-down window as his van sputters to noisy life.

When she turns back to get her eyes on Carver, he’s gone. She spots him only as Eddie peels out of the parking lot, Carver’s douchey car hot on his heels.

Robin turns and runs back into the school. She’d spotted another douchey car still loitering in the parking lot; Steve’s in here somewhere.

She checks the library first, knows from previous confessions that it’s where he and Chrissy work on most of the secret admirer notes. It’s deserted aside from a scattering of freshmen in one corner, and Nancy Wheeler arguing with the librarian about a text the library doesn’t seem to have.

She finds herself in the gym next, unsure if any sports are currently in season, but nice guy or not, Steve’s got jock sensibilities. He likes the gym. There’s a singular kid shooting baskets, but based on the rack of balls off to the side, there might have been more.

She goes to the boy’s locker room without thinking, pushing the swinging door open with sweaty palms and shaking arms.

Inside, she finds boys, all blessedly dressed.

“Ohhh!” they call juvenilely as she stands there, shocked as four pairs of eyes lock on her.

“Girl in the locker room!” someone calls; she’s pretty sure that’s Tommy Hagan’s smug voice, but she barely notices, too caught up in trying to find her boy in the mess of bodies.

“Steve,” Robin strangles out.

Her skin feels tacky with panic sweat, and in the past five minutes of searching, she’s run her fingers through her own hair enough times to leave it sticking on end. She’s sure she looks more like a troll doll than an enticing member of the opposite sex.

“He already left,” a guy she doesn’t recognize responds, eying her up and down. “But I’d be more than happy to help you out.”

As if his meaning wasn’t already clear, he bites his lip and swipes his lip like he’s wiping up drool as all the other boys start “ooooh”ing in unison again. Is that something they’re taught in elementary, or something?

She doesn’t wait for them to continue, just turns and runs out of the locker room, panic nipping at her heels.

She runs back out to the parking lot, out of places to check and desperate to not miss Steve leaving.

That’s where she finds him, leaning casually against his car like Eddie’s life isn’t at stake.

She runs so fast, limbs uncoordinated and breaths coming rapid, that she doesn’t stop in time and hit’s Steve straight in the chest. 

She bounces off, almost falling to the pavement until he grabs her shoulders and steadies her. Steve’s hands feel big on her shoulders, the pressure of his palms pushing her soul back into her body as she takes big, deep gulps.

“What’s wrong, Bobby?” he asks, already looking at her like she’s a wet puppy he’s ready to scoop into his arms and dry off with the shirt on his own back.

There’s too many witnesses, and too many damning words to be said, so all she whispers is, “you need to go, Steve.”

He wrinkles his nose, but something of the gravity of her words must sink in because he leans in without hesitation and meets her pitch as he asks, “where?”

Robin steps even closer, damn-near standing on Steve’s toes as she begins her stilted explanation.

“Jason Carver followed Eddie’s van in his car,” Robin starts, words blurring into each other in her haste to get them out. “I don’t know what he’s planning, but—“

She doesn’t get to finish; Steve bolts to the driver's side door and flings himself into his car without sparing her a second thought.  She can’t blame him.

Robin only hopes he makes it in time.

PART 12

[the-brucest-fan]

That's when he realized. King Boo only wanted him, and he wouldn't stop until he got the green-clad plumber. Luigi was afraid, he didn't know what would happen once he went through the portal, what he could find there, but if that was the only chance to keep Mario and everyone else safe, he was willing to take it.

“Mario! You have to let me go!”

“WHAT?!”, Mario said in astonishment.

“I know what to do, you gotta trust me”, Luigi said, determination filling his eyes.

“I do trust you! But I don't trust him”, Mario replied, his eyes briefly pointing to the vortex where the royal Boo had entered.

“It is me who he wants. If I don't do this, he'll destroy everything!”, replied the green-clad plumber.

Mario stared at his little brother, hesitant. Luigi's eyes said it all: he was willing to jump into the portal and there was no way he would change his mind.

Well, neither do Mario.

“I know, but I... I don't wanna lose you again”, Mario's eyes were filled with fear. The fear he didn't feel during his time being trapped in a painting, he was feeling it now. He had been separated from Luigi again for what he felt was an eternity, and now he was about to play a stunt that could possibly cost him his life, and Mario just couldn't bear losing his brother. Luigi's life was literally on his hand. “I'm sorry”, he said firmly, “but I'm not gonna let you go.”

Luigi felt Mario's grip tighten around his wrist. If there was something Mario was really good at, was being stubborn. The younger plumber knew words would never convince Mario to let him go, so without him noticing, Luigi slowly detached the flashlight from the Poltergust...

“I know.”

He pressed the button and the Strobulb did his job: the sudden flash stunned Mario right away, instinctively using his left hand to cover his eyes.

“NO!”, he screamed when he realized what he had done. Horrorized, with tears in his eyes and with DK holding him into place so he wouldn't go after him, Mario saw his brother being sucked by the portal.

“I'm sorryyyyyy!”, cried Luigi.

“LUIGIIIIIIIIII!!”

And with that, the green-clad plumber disappeared along with the portal.

This is the first Luigi I draw in months and I just had to draw him in an angsty scenario, haha 😅

It's actually from and idea that popped in my head about a potential Luigi's Mansion movie, and of course our beloved green bean had to sacrifice himself to save everyone (but don't worry, we all know he wins at the end 😉)

[heartfullofleeches]

Yan arena beasts/fighters + handler reader. Reader is an average human working at a zoo/shelters abducted and thrown into a life of caring for a galactic tyrant's playthings due to their experience with animals. Not an idea choice for the job, but with everyone who's had the job before being maimed, killed, or worse they were running out of options. Reader does the best with what they're given. They find solitude with the other captives to an extent and some of the more feral creatures remind them of stray cats and dogs they knew back home. They treat those who allow as those same poor creatures out of habit and to cope with their new life. Others are so aggressive they have to be blindfold and sedated to even get close. Reader still tries to comfort them despite the many scratches and bites they receive

A little mix up happens where a warrior meant to fight the big bad of the area had already been slain by the beast. With no alternative, reader gets sent out instead as sacrifice to appease the blood hungry masses. They cower in the corner as the beast's mask is removed, praying their battered body at least gets shipped home so they have a proper burial and their family has some clue to what happened to them. They cast their small dagger away still unable to defend themselves against what they only see as a frightened animal protecting its own skin. The beast lifts them off the ground like a ragdoll holding them high for the crowd to see as its fangs draw from its scarred lips - breaking the band around its wrist that would seal reader's victory.

The beast ties the rope around reader's neck as the announcer declares them victor by default. The crowd boos, but as the beast snaps the neck of one of the guards and throws the limb body into the arena their demands are met. Reader quakes from the sheer disbelief of the whole ordeal, and still being trapped in the beast's arms as it coos. It takes over a dozen guards to get them to separate the two. They try again with another beast reader has care for and the same thing happens. Watching the live footage closely it's clear to experts the skilled fighters allow themselves to get injured to be coddled and tended to by reader. When rations are given they try to feed reader a share of their meals. The number of casualties skyrocket when reader's taken away or new caretakers are introduced. The beasts demand their head pats and ear scratches for their winnings and they want it from one source alone.

-

The emperor is quite amused by this revelation. It perfectly masks his paranoia in the case of his pets rising against him for whatever reason and choosing the earthling as their new overlord which few have spoken of in whispers. He's torn between killing them to null his fears and befriending them to puppeteer his pets craftfully from the shadows. He decides on the latter since getting rid of them would only anger his pets. That and it would be so easy to trick the human with his charms. Few can resist the words and body of a king, after all.

"Y/n, darling, it's so good to see you! So glad you could make it. How have things been, hm?"

"I'd like to go home, please."

"Hahaha! Oh, you're so cute with your little jokes! You may enjoy your meal in due time, but I have a favor to ask of you from a friend to a king. In the case of I don't know - my pets slaughtering my entire legion and storming my castle walls to behead me and crown you ruler - would you pretty please ask them to - not do that?"

"That....sounds like it would be out of my hands."

"Right. Changing subject, you are aware I have been topless this whole conversation and my bed is right behind me. Why haven't you attempted to have your way with me by now? Not saying you could - but you can always try."

The emperor upgrades their room to one right next to his, but they hardly sleep there favoring their time caring for the others and because they'd rather stay there than see him in a state of undress on their mattress. The emperor mimics the cooing that gets wounded beasts extra smothering from their handler, but reader mostly ignores him. He grows jealous seeing them fast asleep in a cell kept warm by the body heat of the battle scarred creatures around them. He's been scarred by attempted assassinations in the past - why doesn't he get cuddles too? Combats this jealously by making a royal decree that reader has to sit with him during every battle and on his lap if they wish to stay out of his sight afterwards. Requests for reader's fredom and hand in marriage and when a champion is chosen are banned almost immediately.

[pucksandpower]

Hi hi. How your taking care of yourself. I just want to ask on the grid kids series is it possible that we can see an interaction between baby Vettel and Carlos. Where Seb and his wife went to today's race (Singapore GP) to support their grid kids and after Carlos wins, baby Vettel calls Carlos smooth operator. You don't have to write it if u don't want to but I love your content ❤️

Grid Kids: Mooth Opawata

Sebastian Vettel x wife!Reader x platonic!drivers

Summary: the Mooth Opawata gains a new fan after his win and the grid kids are reminded that their sister will always be their biggest supporter

Series Masterlist

Carlos, drenched in champagne and glowing with the thrill of victory, scoops your daughter up into his arms as he steps down from the podium. The little girl giggles, her tiny hands reaching for the sparkling trophy he’s holding.

“Look at you! Celebrating with the winner,” Carlos chuckles, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead.

Sebastian laughs, “Well, looks like you’ve got yourself a new little fan.”

“I think she just likes the shiny trophy,” you tease.

Carlos pretends to think it over, “Hmm, maybe, but I think it’s my charming personality. Or maybe it’s the hair.”

Your daughter claps her hands, “Shiny! Mooth Opawata!” She points at Carlos, trying her best to mimic the song Lando constantly plays for her.

Carlos’ eyes widen in amusement, a big grin spreading across his face. “Did she just ...”

Lando, joining the group with his own second place trophy, can’t contain his smile. “I might have played the song for her a few times ... or maybe a few dozen.”

Sebastian shakes his head with a laugh at the antics of your grid kid, “No wonder she’s been trying to sing it all week.”

Carlos tickles her sides, making her giggle uncontrollably. “So I’m the Mooth Opawata now?”

She nods vigorously, tiny fists clenching the fabric of his race suit. “Mooth Opawata!” She declares again, much to the amusement of everyone around.

“I think,” Charles chimes in with a boop to her nose, “that someone is trying to steal your nickname, Carlos.”

Carlos squishes your daughter’s chubby cheeks, drawing another laugh from her, “There’s plenty of room for two Smooth Operators in the paddock when the second one is so cute.”

You heart melts watching them interact. “She’s just staking her claim ahead of time. Future Ferrari driver right here.”

Carlos winks, “With her genes? I have no doubt. But for now, she’s my lucky charm.” He gently sets her down, watching as she toddles over to Lando and grabs his hand.

Lando bends down, “Did you have fun watching the race, kiddo?”

She nods enthusiastically, pointing back at Carlos, “Mooth Opawata win!”

Sebastian chuckles as the rest of the grid kids quickly make their way over to take turns holding their sister, “You guys are going to spoil her.”

“She might as well get used to all the attention,” Carlos shrugs with a mischievous smile. “I have a feeling she’ll be up here in red one day too.”

***

As the group approaches Lance’s hotel room later that night, Lando knocks softly. “Mate, you in there? We brought a cheering squad.”

The door slowly creaks open to reveal a forlorn-looking Lance, sporting a slight bruise on his cheek. “Hey, guys.”

Your daughter breaks free from Sebastian’s hold and toddles straight to Lance, tugging on his hoodie. “Up! Up!” She demands.

Lance can’t help but laugh as he picks her up, her innocent joy slightly lifting his spirits. “Hi there, little one.”

She pats his cheek gently. “Boo-boo?” She asks with a concerned frown.

Lance smiles sadly, “Yeah, a bit of a boo-boo.”

She plants a tiny kiss on his cheek. “Better?”

Lance’s eyes soften, “Much better, thank you.”

Charles nudges Lance lightly. “See? Who needs physiotherapy when you’ve got magic little sister kisses?”

Lance laughs, “True that.”

Lance, now slightly more animated, takes a second glance at Charles, noting the distant expression he was trying to hide. “Hey, Leclerc, that face isn’t fooling any of us. Don’t bottle it up.”

Charles sighs, leaning against the wall. “It’s just … it was a frustrating race.”

Your daughter, sensing another brother in distress, makes her way over to him, her little arms reaching up. “Hug?”

Charles can’t resist her charm. He bends down, allowing her to wrap her little arms around his neck. “You think that’ll make the sad race go away?” He teases.

She nods seriously, pulling back slightly and placing her hands on either side of his face. “Smile, Char-Char.”

The mood lightens further when George joins you, although the disappointment in his eyes from how his race ended is still evident.

Mick steps forward, placing a mini helmet in your daughter’s hands. “Alright, remember our plan?”

She nods vigorously, clumsily walking over to George and offering him the helmet. “For you!”

George’s smile turns real as he recognizes the mini version of his own racing helmet. “For me? That’s so sweet of you!” He looks up at Mick, “Did you put her up to this?”

Mick grins, “Might’ve given her a tiny nudge.”

Sebastian joins in, “You know, George, there’s always another race. And you’ve got all of us cheering for you. And she,” he points to your daughter, “is your biggest fan yet.”

“I wuv you all!” She exclaims, spreading her tiny arms wide. The room instantly melts, each driver touched by the pure sentiment.

You wrap an arm around both Lance and George, motioning for Charles to join the hug with a nod of your head, which quickly leads to all of the grid kids huddling around you. “Bad days happen. But family’s here to make sure they don’t last.”

Lando chimes in, “And to ensure you have plenty of snacks. Chocolate, anyone?”

Max raises an eyebrow, “You brought chocolate?”

Lando winks, “I always come prepared.”

Your daughter claps her hands in excitement. “Choco!”

[bloodycyrano]

I'm bored, here's team tadpole at the beach.

Karlach: splashing her feet in the water and looking at all the critters in the tide pools. She's probably making the most dope sandcastle you will ever see, with Clive as the ruler.

Shadowheart: Shadowheart doesn't tan. Shadowheart burns. She burns *bad*. Shadowheart is sitting under a very large umbrella, gossiping to Astarion, and religiously re-applying sunscreen every thirty minutes.

Halsin: Halsin is a bear. He's just a fluffy bear, relaxing in the sand. Perhaps he splashes about in the water a bit. Maybe he takes a moment in biped-form to whittle a duck. But he spends 99.9% of the time as a bear.- He also accidentally sat on Karlach's sandcastle, and spent the rest of the evening helping her to rebuild it even better.

Gale: Gale is trying to take a break from being camp dad, and failing miserably. He's constantly trying to remind everyone to hydrate and take some time in the shade so they don't get sun-sick, all while trying to relax and enjoy the beach himself. He ends up falling asleep in the sun, rolling over, and sunburning the left half of his body.

Wyll: Perhaps the only one who's managed to actually relax, Wyll has tried a bit of everything. Laying out in the sun, having a snack, drinking a bit of wine, and admiring the waves. Wyll, upon noticing that Karlachs sand castle got ruined, also decided to help rebuild it.

Tav/durge: Does not like the sun, was forced to come out. They're extremely overstimulated right now and have spent most of the time either in the water or digging a massive hole in the sand. Durge specifically has been making a lot of weird jokes about drowning people.

Astarion: Was the one who sent Tav/durge to dig a hole to blow off steam. Astarion has been pulling some small pranks and gossiping with Shadowheart. Most notably, the group very quickly learned not to ask Astarion to help apply sunscreen to their backs, because it resulted in bad words and drawings sunburning into their skin.

Jaheira: Has been enjoying the sun, she's had a glass of wine, and is currently trying to keep an eye on durge to make sure they don't ACTUALLY drown someone. Minsc has been keeping her company, somewhat.

Minsc: Got into a fistfight with a shark, had character development, and then tried to hunt down and apologize to the shark. Spent the rest of the night feeding Boo little treats from the snack table.

Minthara: Can't fucking see in this bright ass weather. This has made her exceptionally grumpy.

Lae'zel: Lae'zel sees absolutely no point in this little excursion. She spent about a fucking hour sharpening her sword, most of the time has been spent shadow-boxing and training. She thought training in the heat of the sun would help boost her discipline and physical tolerance, but then she got sick. It took 4 people to convince her to try and cool off in the water.

[goldennikko]

I LUVIE YOU — huh yunjin

summary : you're a reveluv, but you love the leader of red velvet a little too much, making someone jealous.

pairing : yunjin x 6th member!reader

tags : idol!au ; reader is '01 liner ; jealous!yunjin ; reveluv!reader ; i'm too sleepy to put proper tags, but dw there's nothing too much in this one. it's just too long T~T

requested: ✔

word count : 5.2k

yunjin knew you were a big fan of red velvet, especially one particular member who everyone refers to as a goddess due to her mind-blowing, out-of-this-world visuals. since pre-debut days, the american has found it amusing to watch you freak out over the one and only bae joohyun whenever you see her on your phone during training. after debuting, your members had grown accustomed to sudden bursts of energy being released following a tiring practice session because you were always bound to listen to red velvet after every tiring session, the soothing voice of red velvet's leader filling your ears.

yunjin has always been a witness to your fangirl-like behavior and found it very amusing to watch.

that is, until yunjin developed the same feelings for the bae joohyun that you did, and the american found herself unable to laugh at your usually amusing antics. well, she tried not to, but she couldn't because you were too cute in her eyes.

yunjin fiddled with her chopsticks as she stared at you from the kitchen with such intensity that sakura, who was busy eating, couldn't help but notice. the japanese frowned at the glare on yunjin's face and followed her line of sight, eventually finding you shaking your poor leader on the couch in the living room. the bad boy music video you were previously watching was now abandoned as you went to bug your leader instead after chaewon made an unintentional statement that she quickly regretted.

"you've met irene sunbaenim?!" you shrieked, betrayal swimming in your shining orbs.

chaewon basically gave up right there, letting you shake her like a doll while silently looking for help from sakura and yunjin.

"correction, y/n-ie. it was chaeyeon, not me." chaewon grumbled.

despite yunjin's best efforts, sakura could hear her annoyed groan, and she cast another glance at the american, whose glare had been replaced with adoration as they watched your shoulders sag in defeat and collapse next to chaewon. yunjin returned her attention to the food, looking away from your defeated form, while sakura decided to assist chaewon.

"and that was during iz*one." sakura added.

"not even kkura unnie met irene sunbaenim." chaewon said, trying to make you feel better, but added more salt to sakura's wound.

the japanese's brow twitched in annoyance, despite her smile, prompting chaewon to apologize before turning to tame your hair. you simply huffed at them and crossed your arms, not looking away from the television.

"unfair."

yunjin snorted, causing sakura to return her gaze, but the american did not meet her unnie's waiting gaze. meanwhile, chaewon handed you your phone, which you used to take a picture of joohyun's overflowing visuals during bad boy era.

"another story? really?" chaewon mumbled from next to you, her eyes twinkling with delight as she watched you press on a bunch of hearts. the sight was not unfamiliar to her, but it still made her laugh because of your unending love for joohyun.

"shush, unnie."

yunjin's phone lit up next to her, drawing both sakura and her attention to it. yunjin didn't bother hiding the notification, which came from you, because she caught sakura's questioning yet teasing look. the american attempted to push down the blush that threatened to spread across her cheeks, but failed, so she hid her face behind her phone instead.

however, the american merely grumbled when joohyun's face greeted her once more, casting you a glance as you let out a high-pitched scream when the same woman who has plagued your mind since pre-debut days appeared on the screen. this time, you were watching peek-a-boo.

"what's the matter?"

yunjin showed her the screen, and sakura laughed at the army of pink hearts before looking at yunjin, who was glaring at her food. the older of the two shook her head at the obvious jealousy, but said nothing as she pieced everything together. while sakura was aware of the glares sent your way by yunjin, she never understood why. now, she did.

"since when?" sakura queried.

yunjin glanced at her, but shrugged. "i don't know what you're talking about, unnie."

sakura smirked. "sure, yunjin. sure."

yunjin ignored her as her gaze returned to you, her heart racing as she wondered if you could get any cuter than you are right now. one thing about yunjin was that she couldn't take her eyes off of you. it was a running joke in the fandom that yunjin was always staring at you with big heart eyes.

similar to what she was doing right now.

after being asked by the fans watching the live, you eagerly danced to zimzalabim, the reveluv within you sparking happily, and eunchae cheered you on. yunjin sat next to the maknae and was silent for once as she watched you with a small smile.

"wah. you were amazing, unnie!" eunchae grinned at you while giving you a big thumbs up.

you exaggerated a bow, which made yunjin laugh. "thank you, thank you, thank you!"

the american motioned for you to come over to where they were sitting. "come on over here, silly."

you smirked at your fellow '01 liner, but complied. you crossed your arms as you faced her, causing the other girl to raise her brows with a smile, while eunchae silently smiled because she already knew what was going to happen, scanning the comments, which were full of fans teasing yunjin's lovestruck gaze.

"are you calling my dance silly, yunjin-ssi?"

yunjin rolled her eyes. "i'm calling you silly, y/n-ssi."

you shook your head. "no, no. calling me silly means calling the dance silly, too. therefore, the reveluv in me is very disappointed and offended, yunjin-ssi."

eunchae cackled while yunjin looked at the phone for help, which the maknae noticed and immediately read the comments in response to yunjin's silent call for help.

"they're saying you're on your own, unnie—"

you grinned happily. "HAH! see? they're on my side!"

yunjin was dumbfounded, sending everyone a look of betrayal. "but her argument didn't even make sense!"

"doesn't matter, yunjin-ssi. now, you shall apologize." 

you jokingly raised your chin at the american, and she mumbled under her breath as she glared at you, but eventually relented. she knew she couldn't win this playful banter because her heart was already pounding in her chest and her mind, which was supposed to think logically, screamed at her to apologize. her very being and existence were vulnerable in the face of your adorable face.

if sakura or kazuha were present, the only other two members who were aware of yunjin's feelings, she would be teased nonstop. it won't be long before the eunchae and chaewon figure it out. 

well, actually, the way eunchae was looking at her right now, yunjin knew the maknae was already aware, but she needed confirmation. eunchae would most likely get one after the live ended.

however, as long as it was you, yunjin didn't mind if her pride suffered.

"fine. i'm sorry, y/n-ie."

you returned your attention to eunchae after you smiled and leaned against the american's body, which yunjin took pride in. the maknae began babbling about something, which yunjin tried to listen to but was distracted by your grip on her. the american grabbed your waist as she leaned in closer to the phone to scan the comments to distract herself, knowing that eunchae was well taken care of by her fellow '01 liner.

her face fell when a comment about a certain idol that you essentially worshipped appeared, which eunchae caught as she squinted her eyes to read the comment before it vanished. yunjin noticed the mischief in the maknae's eyes as she managed to draw your attention to said remark.

"unnie, there's a comment about irene sunbaenim."

"where?!"

at that, you jumped away from yunjin, causing the girl to squint her eyes in disbelief. 

at this point, it was unavoidable for you not to mention joohyun in a solo, unit, or group appearance. you mentioned the woman you adored every time, and it was no different this time, and yunjin had to listen to it all over again, all because of the evil maknae, who planned to torture her.

yunjin glared at eunchae from behind you, and the maknae simply grinned widely in response before they both turned to you because you had begun your detailed explanation of why you adored red velvet's leader.

"alright. first of all, have you seen her?! irene sunbaenim is so gorgeous like—" 

you panicked suddenly when you saw joohyun's face in your mind and waved your arms in the air, almost hitting yunjin. fortunately, she noticed it at the last second and was able to avoid it. as eunchae laughed, the girl glared at the side of your head in distaste, but you didn't notice her.

yunjin resisted the urge to roll her eyes, but she tuned out your irritating rant and tried to distract herself by scanning the comments, which were unfortunately filled with your beloved idol's name, causing her to look away in defeat.

"and her voice! i don't know. it's small, but soothing and really good to listen to?" you hummed thoughtfully.

"that's true, unnie." eunchae butted in, causing you to nod.

"also! she's so caring towards her members and really kind! she's also a good cook, according to what i've heard! not to mention, really generous..." you trailed off, recalling how she gifted her staff some really expensive things, but you shook your head to snap out of your lovestruck trance and resumed your rant.

"i don't know. she's just so… perfect!"

that was your conclusion before you changed the subject due to a fan's mention of food. eunchae joined in, but yunjin remained silent as her mind raced.

when you returned to the dorm, you went straight to your room, while yunjin stayed in the living room with chaewon. while sakura was still out on a schedule, eunchae joined you to get her daily dose of cuddles.

the only other two members awake were enveloped in silence, and chaewon found yunjin's behavior odd, frequently looking up from her phone to check on the emerican, who stared blankly at the wall. the leader, though concerned, waited for yunjin to open up, but after a solid 15 minutes, her concern about the american's unusual behavior only grew.

"yunjin—"

"unnie."

chaewon blinked at her dull voice and almost jumped out of her seat when yunjin turned her head to her leader. chaewon raised her eyebrows, urging yunjin to tell her what was bothering her, which yunjin did.

"am i gorgeous?"

despite being perplexed, chaewon responded to the question. she noticed no signs of insecurity in her eyes, which was a relief. besides, if yunjin was truly insecure, she would be in bed with you right now, not chaewon. however, she still found the american in front of her odd.

"yes, you are, jen."

"is my voice soothing and really good to listen to?" yunjin threw her another question, causing the frown on chaewon's forehead to deepen. yunjin either noticed but ignored or didn't notice chaewon's weirded out expression.

"you're a vocalist for a reason, yunjin." chaewon replied.

yunjin blinked. "am i caring and kind?"

it was chaewon's turn to blink as she wondered just where the hell these questions were coming from, but she decided to join in whatever games yunjin was playing, if indeed this was one.

"yes."

"am i a good cook?"

chaewon sighed, her patience dwindling, as she ran her hand down her face. yunjin, on the other hand, remained unaffected and waited for her leader's response, which chaewon begrudgingly provided after seeing the blank yet awaiting gaze.

"jesus christ, yunjin. yes, you are a good cook. y/n-ie has mentioned numerous times."

a flash of emotion flashed across the american's eyes, causing chaewon to raise a brow, but yunjin didn't give her a chance to respond as she turned around to retire to her room, but not before thanking her leader.

chaewon frowned as yunjin walked upstairs before eunchae appeared with a sleepy grin and sakura made her presence known by placing a hand on chaewon's shoulder.

"what the hell was that?" chaewon asked, perplexed.

sakura chuckled. "chaewon-ah, a certain someone likes a certain someone in this dorm."

chaewon blinked. "eh? yunjin likes someone?" 

sakura gave the younger girl a look, waiting for it to click, which didn't take too long. 

oh. 

chaewon sighed in disbelief as realization dawned on her face. meanwhile, eunchae greeted sakura with a hug while mumbling into the coat sakura forgot to take off after hearing yunjin's strange questions as soon as she entered the dorm.

"yunjin unnie was blushing."

chaewon snickered and rose to assist sakura with her coat, as eunchae refused to let go of the newly arrived japanese girl. "after i told her about y/n?"

eunchae nodded in response, not bothering to mention the words' familiarity. but sakura already knew because she had been watching the live stream, and chaewon was bound to find out soon enough, given that she had been on her phone earlier. she'd later discover your and joohyun's names, along with eunchae and yunjin, were trending.

"how come we never knew?" chaewon queried thoughtfully.

sakura shrugged. "exactly my question."

eunchae rubbed her eyes. "i think kazuha unnie knows."

chaewon and sakura shared an amused look. "of course zuha would."

yes, kazuha knew. even before yunjin told her about her conflicting emotions��conflicting because yunjin didn't even want them in the first place, but she couldn't do anything about it if her heart was fiercely beating for a certain girl in the group.

the poor ballerina, on the other hand, was unfortunately very much aware of what others couldn't see due to her observant nature, but she didn't mind. only that it irritates her to no end to watch some people dance around their obvious feelings, at least to kazuha, rather than acting on them.

but now, kazuha is watching you bounce all over the place due to your excitement. the group would be attending a variety show, and your beloved idol would be there as one of the emcees. your nervousness and exhilaration initially clashed within you, but the latter eventually won. therefore, your members and staff had an excessively happy puppy.

you were not informed that you would be attending this show because they knew you would be overjoyed for days and they wouldn't be able to handle you. yunjin, in particular, who grumbled when told a few days earlier by chaewon and was pouting in the corner at the moment, her eyes following your every move with an irritated scowl.

"I'M MEETING IRENE SUNBAENIM!"

yunjin's glaring eyes were caught by kazuha, but the latter averted her gaze with a click of her tongue before returning to watching you. however, the ballerina could see the affection buried behind the very thin line of displeasure in her eyes, causing her to chuckle, but she stopped when you halted in front of her.

"i'm so excited, zuha-yah." you bounced in front of her.

kazuha smiled and reached for your hand to ground you. "please calm down, unnie."

"i can't!" you whined, pouting.

chaewon came over and attempted to pat your head, but she couldn't reach your height, so she patted your cheek instead.

"you'll get tired if you keep bouncing around, so please sit with yunjin for a while."

yunjin snapped out of her glaring at the mention of her name and panicked internally as she saw you walking up. she yelped, barely catching you as you dramatically fell on her, but she sighed as you nestled up against her embrace.

"you scared me, dumbass."

you chuckled. "sorry. chaewon unnie told me to relax with you."

yunjin scoffed, but tightened her grip around your waist. "relaxing with me doesn't mean falling on me, y/n."

you, on the other hand, did not respond to her. yunjin took a brief glance but ended up staring when she discovered your eyelids had fallen shut.

sakura, who was still sat in front of the mirror, noticed you finally relaxing with the resident american. she smiled at the thought that yunjin was the only one who could ground you. you were always so quick to surrender to yunjin's familiar warmth and soothing embrace, and yunjin was always ready to offer it to you when you needed it.

"they're so cute, unnie!" eunchae squealed, but tried to keep it down as she approached sakura, and the older of the two agreed.

"when is yunjin unnie going to confess though?" kazuha stressed from nearby.

"speaking of." chaewon piped up. "since when, zuha?"

kazuha shrugged. "since forever, unnie! it's actually stressing me out."

the others laughed, and kazuha sighed before joining them. it was peaceful for a while before the group was summoned to the set and you were back on bouncing, but this time in anxiety.

"y/n, please settle down." chaewon sighed.

"i can't stop it!" you whisper-yelled.

kazuha shot yunjin a look, but the american was already approaching you. while you were jumping, a hand grabbed your waist and pulled you into the familiar warmth of yunjin's body. you stumbled, but her other hand darted out to hold your elbow steady.

"calm down please."

you gave her a timid smile, and she rolled her eyes tenderly, squeezing you in assurance. she couldn't feel anything other than admiration right now as she clutched you closely. you enjoyed yunjin's presence while remaining silent, and yunjin did the same before the peace was disrupted once more.

when the chatters were heard, everyone turned, and your eyes widened, meeting the bae joohyun's gentle eyes. you bowed profusely, and she returned it with a wide smile.

although joohyun's bow was meant for everyone, her gaze lingered a little too long on you, which yunjin noticed. her grasp on your waist tightened and she drew you closer, but you were too preoccupied with seeing your beloved idol walk away.

"holy shit, jen."

yunjin resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "yeah, yeah. i know, y/n."

soon enough, the show began, and you spent nearly half of it looking at the woman. you were relieved that you didn't have to speak as much, but whenever you did, chaewon would nudge you out of your daydream and sakura would help you with your words because you seemed to have forgotten how to speak. throughout the ordeal, eunchae was just silently chuckling. 

meanwhile, yunjin was next to you, watching you stare and stumble over your words, sadness in the pit of her stomach physically hidden by a trained grin. kazuha, on the other hand, noticed and patted her on the back.

joohyun didn't take long to notice your dazed stare. she was speaking as scripted, but suddenly laughed, flustered, when she caught your starstruck expression, confusing everyone. you blinked and pointed at yourself, your gaze briefly meeting yunjin's.

"i'm sorry. y/n-ssi, you just look so adorable."

you flushed as crimson as a tomato at the compliment and bowed excessively, words of gratitude stumbling out of your mouth in a hurry. your members teased you as yunjin laughed genuinely this time because she agrees with her senior, heart flipping at the sight of your red face.

"i'm sorry. it's just… i'm a really big fan, sunbaenim." you admitted shyly.

joohyun gave you a wide smile. "seulgi and wendy told me, and i've also seen clips of your… admiration."

you shrieked and used yunjin as your human shield to hide your embarrassment. despite the displeasure she was feeling, yunjin held you while the others laughed before you were pulled out of protection by chaewon.

"and thank you so much for loving me." joohyun said, causing you to bow. 

you were at a loss for words, but the next thing she said prompted you to shut down and flee to hide from everyone.

"but i can say i'm a fan, too, y/n-ssi. your voice is really good to listen to and you're perfect."

you hid among the members of the group's management staff, and yunjin was ready to retrieve you when joohyun beat her to it. with a small frown that she quickly hid, yunjin watched silently as joohyun coaxed you out of hiding.

"i'm sorry, come on. don't hide."

yunjin looked at your joined hands as you practically melted with the senior next to you and in your presence. when the displeasure growing in her chest became too great for her to bear, the american had to look away, but she peered at your flustered state when joohyun successfully drew you back next to her.

the show went on without a hitch except for you being teased for having such admiration for the woman while yunjin remained unusually silent, joining in here and there when she felt like it or when you clutched to her arm.

and yunjin couldn't enjoy your touch as much as she wanted to because your eyes were on someone else. if she wanted your attention, she needed it all. she didn't like sharing. but then again, you weren't hers to share with anyone in the first place.

the show came to a conclusion, and you were swept away by the one and only joohyun. it was obvious that the woman had developed feelings for you, but everyone knew, including yourself, it was joohyun's motherly instincts kicking in.

everyone knew, but yunjin.

yunjin felt she couldn't endure the anguish at the sigh of you being held by another and turned on her heels to flee after seeing how caring and loving joohyun was to you. she attempted to be covert and quick, but as soon as she tried to blend into the crowd, a pair of eyes were trained on the back of her head like a target.

yunjin was soon back at the dorm. she laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. her thoughts was blank, but she was aching all over and wasn't sure if it was because of you or just tiredness. however, she didn't bother figuring it out because your interactions with your favorite idol played out in her head like a romance movie.

yunjin couldn't get it out of her head, no matter how hard she tried.

fortunately, although being out of it at the time, yunjin was able to process the knock on her door. she got to her feet and opened the door, her eyes widening when she saw your hesitant form. her eyes swept over your body, finding you adorable in the pajamas she had bought you at random, and she smiled weakly.

"y/n? it's late."

you shuffled around, refusing to meet her eyes. "i know. i'm sorry, were you already sleeping?"

yunjin shook her head and stepped aside to let you in. "no, no. i couldn't sleep."

you gave her a short smile, and yunjin almost fell over simply to see it again, but she kept her composure as she followed you to her bed. after noticing your hesitation, the american took a seat and motioned for you to do the same.

"is everything okay? did you get a nightmare?" yunjin fussed over you, brows furrowed in worry.

you shook your head. "no, no. i'm fine. i just… wanted to check on you."

yunjin's heart wrenched as you looked up at her, your hesitation spinning in your orbs. the american sighed and reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear before caressing your chin to make you hold her stare, which you had avoided since entering her room.

"i appreciate, but why?" yunjin asked.

you fiddled with your thumbs. "i saw you leaving earlier and you were ignoring me."

yunjin quickly shook her head. she wasn't ignoring you, and she didn't mean to. she just avoided interactions with you in order to process the concept of you and joohyun, but she kept an eye on you throughout the craziness of eventually finishing the day.

"i was not ignoring you, but i'm sorry if it felt like that." yunjin murmured softly, leaning down to meet your gaze. "i was just tired."

but you shook your head. "i know you, jen, we've been friends for so long. what's wrong?"

yunjin frowned, ignoring the painful tug on her heart at the term you used, which was true. the american considered the pros and cons of giving you the truth against fabricating a lie, but the way you were looking at her right now with such vulnerability and worry broke yunjin's resolve.

"i…" yunjin trailed off before sighing. "i've always been content to admire you silently."

yunjin smiled as she opened her mouth to spill her inevitable confession after a quick prayer for her soul and you to take it kindly, ignoring the large part of her wishing that you'd accept her confession.

"i've memorized every single habit you've established over the years, no matter how long ago you developed them or how recently it came up. i have liked every single one of your antics, and no matter how ridiculous they were, i always thought you were so adorable." 

yunjin smiled softly, and you returned it shyly, a scarlet hue flashing over your nose, but then her grin faded slightly. you pricked up, worried, and wanted to reach out to perhaps console her, but you hesitated. you weren't sure if she wanted your comfort, so you opted to listen. yunjin, on the other hand, saw the nearly imperceptible movement of your hand and couldn't help the quick smile.

yunjin sighed. "y/n, i swear i tried. i was perfectly satisfied with just admiring you silently. i tried to ignore the negative side of my feelings—the annoyance, the sadness, the displeasure. everything."

"but i can't pretend you don't effect me anymore, and believe me when i say i don't mind, but it just hurts."

yunjin observed calmly as the gears in your brain turned to quickly absorb her words, but you frowned in uncertainty. yunjin knew you understood; you weren't that stupid. she also knew you needed more assurance and simple words since you were concerned you were reading too much into her little statement.

so yunjin gave you a teary grin because she knew her next words would define your relationship.

"i like you, y/n. more than a friend should."

you hung your head, teeth biting into your bottom lip, as the words smacked you in the face. yunjin stared at the top of your head, willing herself to be prepared for your rejection, but every fiber of her being knew she wouldn't take it well. 

when you raised your head again, her breath caught in her throat as she saw your sweet smile and loving eyes, hope flooding her chest.

"i knew."

it was yunjin's turn to be astounded. her eyes widened as she leaned forward, encouraging you to repeat it and making you laugh.

"you weren't subtle, but i didn't allow it get to my head just in case i was reading too much into your intentions." you grinned happily.

"but you weren't." yunjin mumbled.

you nodded. "turns out i wasn't."

"so?"

you laughed again, and yunjin took satisfaction in it as she saw you toss your head back. but when you leaned into her face with a smirk, the softness in your gaze was swiftly replaced by mischief. yunjin's heart skipped a beat as she tried, but eventually failed, not to gaze down at your lips.

"yunjin?"

she glanced up at you. "yeah?"

"were you jealous of irene unnie?"

yunjin's brow twitched at the title you were now permitted to use for your adored idol, and she tried to control herself, although she had no reason to do so this time. so she rolled her eyes so hard that you were scared they'd get trapped in the back, but you laughed in delight.

"i was not." yunjin denied, looking away.

you poked her nose. "looking away is a sign of lying, did you know that?"

yunjin huffed, but complied. she returned your gaze and her breath hitched once more as your palm reached up to caress her jaw. when you leaned in closer, she swallowed nervously, your warm breath hitting her cold lips. yunjin wanted to close the unpleasant gap between you, but decided to give you complete control.

and yunjin couldn't have been more grateful when you captured her lips.

sparks flew, butterflies swarmed, and every cliche she could think of occurred at the same time. yunjin's eyes fell shut as she tilted her head and reached for your neck to lock you in place.

at the same time, seconds felt both too long and too short. yunjin couldn't determine which of the two, but her attention was quickly drawn to the way you rested your brow against hers and inhaled lightly to catch your breath, which yunjin had taken from you.

"took you long enough." you chuckled. "i like you, too."

yunjin smiled. relief washed over her as her heart flipped a few times and she sought for your hand, the other still resting on your neck, refusing to let you go this time.

"you never dropped hints." yunjin panted.

you shook your head with a small huff. "neither did you, jen, but i just thought you were too perfect to even notice me."

"more perfect than irene sunbaenim?" yunjin joked, not wasting the opportuniy given to her. you gave her a look, almost as if judging the american, causing her to grin. "but i notice you, i do see you."

yunjin brought your hand to her lips and a faint smile appeared on her face, prompting you to return it, albeit sheepishly, as she pressed a kiss to your knuckles.

"and i like you so much, y/n."

you laughed at her goofy antics and squeezed her hand, a blush covering your cheeks that yunjin thought was adorable on you.

"i like you, too, so much, yunjin."

she hummed. "what about irene sunbaenim?"

you chuckled and pulled away to flick her forehead, causing her to yelp in pain.

"what the hell?!"

"joohyun unnie knew about you." you said, causing your girlfriend to frown in confusion. "i told her because unnie noticed the way you were glaring at her."

yunjin flushed. her jealousy was evident to the naked sight. to make matters worse, it was joohyun who noticed. the one she allegedly despised saw the look. you laughed at her, and she flashed you a short frown before sighing.

"i need to apologize and clarify some things."

you nodded in agreement. "you do, baby. you do."

yunjin's heart skipped a beat when she looked at you. you returned it until you felt embarrassed, bending in to avoid her sight. before leaping from the bed, you laid a delicate kiss on her lips. yunjin pouted and reached out to you as you approached the door.

"where are you going, my love? you can just sleep with me."

you smiled, red in the face. "i know, but i'm going to the kitchen; kkura unnie is cooking, and i believe everyone has arrived."

you opened the door and gave her one more look before disappearing down the dimly lighted corridor.

"i luvie you, jennifer huh."

yunjin, who was normally annoyed by your reveluv side because you idolized a particular leader, rolled her eyes fondly as she rose to her feet. before leaving her room to follow you, she picked up her phone and smiled at the lockscreen of your face that you had set a few weeks previously.

"i luvie you, too, l/n y/n."

nikko note: I'M SO SORRY IF THE REQS ARE SLOW, YOU GUYS. I'M LEGIT DROWNING IN MY SCHOOL SHIT, SO I'M VV SORRY. I HOPE THIS IS GOOD ENOUGH, I'M SOOO SORRY FOR MAKING YOU WAIT HUHU I HOPE THIS MAKES UP FOR THE SLOW UPDATES AJDJJWJS anyways, i hope you liked this one! let me know if this was okay? and so sorry for mistakes, i'm legit sleepy. thank you, have a great one!

[loveinhawkins]

Steve gets the idea from Dustin and Robin, in a roundabout way: Robin insists on buying a camping stove from The War Zone, which Dustin pounces upon with glee as soon as he notices it.

“Oh, we’re cooking with gas now,” he says, which is the worst pun Steve has heard thus far.

Eddie snorts, almost but not quite hidden underneath the sound of the engine. Steve smiles.

“Y’know there’s a stove right here?” he asks in benign exasperation, gestures behind him to the little kitchen area of the RV.

“Steve,” Robin says, “that’s not as fun.”

“Yeah, come on, Steve! It’ll be like at Camp Know Where—”

“Know Nothing,” Steve mutters automatically.

“—we oft dined al fresco.”

“Oft,” Eddie parrots, and Steve can faintly feel the movement of him laughing, from where he’s pressed up against the back of the driver’s seat. “Al fresco. Henderson, what lab did they make you in?”

“Eddie, either shut up or back me up, I wanna get a culturally enriching experience outta this.”

“Oh, excuse me, didn’t realise this was a field trip.”

“You’re excused.”

“Okay,” Steve cuts in, “have fun playing at camping, Henderson, but don’t come crying to me if you, like, blow yourself up.”

Robin chuckles. “Such a happy camper.”

“Boo,” Steve says flatly.

He parks the RV a little bit away from a store just off the main road—heads in alone as it’ll draw less attention. Out loud, he says it’s so he can focus without hearing whining pleas to buy junk food, whether Dustin-approved or not, but he already knows he’ll cater to each and every one of the group’s demands.

Eddie, surprisingly, doesn’t put in a request, says he’s happy to just go along with whatever everyone else wants—a far cry from when Nancy had relayed, with more amusement than frustration, “He said he wants a six-pack.”

Steve figures that the whole being wanted for murder thing would kill anyone’s appetite, but it still makes his stomach sink, that the most substantial meal Eddie’s gotten a chance to eat has been lukewarm Spaghettios.

They set up ‘camp’ in a field, and Robin’s the first to rush outside, shortly followed by Dustin, both intent on using the stove she’s bought.

Steve leaves them all to it, kind of enjoys the temporary peace of just messing about in the RV on his own—it gives him enough time to find where some crockery is kept, anyway.

He’s heating up chicken noodle soup on the stove when Eddie comes back in and tells him, “They got it working, no explosions yet.”

“Oh, miracles can happen. Good timing, by the way.” Steve switches the burner off, pours the soup into a bowl and sets it down on the table—where he’s already laid out a spoon. “Yours is ready.”

At first he doesn’t think the silence is all that unusual. He’s not really looking either, focusing on rinsing out the pan he’d used. But when he does glance up, it’s to see Eddie just standing there, looking at the bowl of soup and blinking rapidly.

It’s almost like… almost like he’s—

“Woah, hey,” Steve says, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing!” Eddie says, even though he’s still quite clearly tearing up. “Absolutely nothing. Jesus Christ.” He groans, presses a couple of fingers to the inner corner of his eyes. “This is fucking mortifying, just pretend you didn’t—ugh.”

In barely a blink, he shuts himself away in the bathroom.

Steve opens his mouth. Closes it. Tries again. “Hate soup that much, huh?”

A watery laugh from behind the door. “No.”

There’s a silence. Steve dries the pan and puts it away before calling, “It’s gonna get cold!”

It won’t for a while yet; he can still see tendrils of steam rising from the bowl.

There’s a long, drawn out sigh, and then Eddie opens the door, sidles in to take a seat at the table.

For a moment, Steve thinks he isn’t going to acknowledge it, which is fine. But as Eddie picks up the spoon he says, head down, “It’s just. That was, uh. Really—really nice.”

Steve’s concern abates a little; he can’t help giving a slight smirk. “Would it help if I was mean instead?”

Eddie laughs again, no tears in it this time. He shrugs with a grin. “Do whatever you want, man.”

He’s eating slowly, his spoon dragging through the soup. His eyes seem distant.

“It’s just… I miss—” His voice threatens to break, but doesn’t quite get there. “I miss… home.”

Before Steve can think of a reasonable reply, Eddie scoffs, rolling his eyes. He drops the spoon with a clatter. “God, that sounds so—”

“It doesn’t,” Steve interrupts.

“Yeah, sure.” Eddie picks up the spoon again, keeps scraping it against the bottom of the bowl.

“Dude, what did I tell you? You’ve gotta give yourself a break.”

Steve pauses, stuck on what to say next.

He can’t even relate, honestly. Home has long become something he couldn’t… Something he couldn’t really miss, exactly.

It’s ever-changing: the luxury of eating a late breakfast in History; the crunch of leaves underfoot as he walked the railroad tracks with Dustin; the chill of the freezer in Scoops Ahoy, Robin’s snorting laugh bouncing off the walls.

Now it’s his car radio playing as he gives rides on busy school mornings. A high school basketball game. A goddamn video store.

“I think you have this thing,” Steve says slowly.

“A promising start,” Eddie says, lips twitching.

He’s finished the soup. The sight spurs Steve on.

“I think you have this thing,” he repeats, more confidently, “where you think that, like, we’re seasoned monster-killers, and you’re—”

“Uh, speaking objectively, Harrington, that’s kinda what you are.”

“My point is,” Steve says, “that you don’t need to—shit, I don’t know, man. Just. You don’t need to apologise or whatever. You’re doing fine.”

Eddie blinks. He’s cupping the empty bowl with his hands, breathing a little deeper, like the residual warmth is calming.

And that Steve can relate to: in the days after Starcourt, when Robin pretty much dragged him to her house, empty thanks to her folks visiting extended family. They both pretended that they just wanted to stay up late because they could, because they were just teenagers enjoying the summer, and Robin had made shitty hot chocolate from a powder, heating up milk on the stove; when Steve complained that he could hardly enjoy it through a busted lip, she’d said, still jittery, “I just thought—it’s just nice to hold, y’know?”

She was right.

One of Eddie’s fingers starts tapping against the bowl, the underside of his ring making a series of restless clinks. Steve wants to still his hand, gently press it further into the warmth. Settle him.

Eddie stands up with the bowl.

“I can—”

“Nah, I’ve got it,” Eddie says, already at the sink. He turns on the faucet, smiles. “Thanks, by the way.”

It’s so simple, so domestic, and all of a sudden, Steve’s struck with a thought: oh, I want this.

“No problem. I’ll get you something better, after… um, everything.”

Eddie chuckles. “Oh, Jesus, I think I actually would kill for some fries.”

Steve clicks his fingers. “So we’ll make it happen.”

“We?”

“Yeah, I hate to break it to you, man, but as soon as they hear about free fries—” Steve jerks his head towards the chatter outside, “—they’re gonna demand to come with, they’re like piranhas.”

He expects Eddie to play up the joke, to groan and complain.

But while he does laugh, Eddie just sighs before saying in earnest, “That sounds fucking fantastic.”

And his eyes are warm and fond, like maybe he’s found another home in all of them, too.

[queer-ragnelle]

Understand is is a very weird question to get out the blue so no offence taken if this gets left in the inbox, but I was wondering how (if at all) to integrate transgender knights into arthurian retellings/adaptations ect while trying to keep it vaguely true to the medievalisms of the whole thing? I know its easy and liberating to just go 'fuck it everything queer' and its a totally valid way to go about it, but (as a trans person) I like having a narrative examine queerphobia and other structual issues with the setting - gives the whole thing a bit of meat (in my personal tastes). That being said, it feels like its a nightmare to try and have a transmasc knight stay stealth in this place! Everyone feels like theyre getting stipped and tended to after breaking a rib in a joust or merlin shows up and is a dick about pronouns and outs you to get you married to a Roman king. Stuff like that - things that feel a little easier to dodge when its a civillian character, not an ruling class.

Is this a 'kill the cop in your brain' kinda deal? As a queer storyteller yourself do you have any tips or strategies or tools you use to crowbar this kinda stuff a little easier together? Or do you know any stories/retellings/academic texts ect that cover these kinda things (even if its in a 'for the love of god, don't do that' way). Love the work you do for this fandom a lot, regardless of your answer! Hope you have a good day.

Hello anon! This is a great question.

Now let me preface this by saying I’m not transgender and I’m not a medievalist. There are plenty of trans medievalists on tumblr, but I’m not one of ‘em. So my answer is coming from a queer but cis author and enthusiast perspective. I'm going to provide lots of links to read things as well so everyone can draw their own conclusions from the material.

I think a large part of this does come down to “kill the cop in your head.” But at the same time, I’ve been exactly where you are wondering, “How can I make this story feel authentic to its era without torturing the trans characters?” Because you’re right, there’s a lot of nudity and close proximity interaction between knights in the medieval stories and Merlin is totally the type to be a dick about pronouns. I've also searched and struggled to find a medieval-set story that manages to incorporate queerness in a period-appropriate way (so far as we can guess) while balancing the narrative as to not tip into something deeply unpleasant for the target audience to read. (See: the series by Lavinia Collins, which has great queer rep, yay! But tons of horrors previously unseen and still unnecessary, boo!) So where does that leave us?

Well first I’m going to give you an example of how not to handle transness in an Arthurian story....

The book Once & Future and its sequel Sword in the Stars by Amy Rose Capetta and Cory McCarthy went with the phenomenon you already described as, “fuck it, everything queer.” It doesn't take place in the past, but does use the medieval stories as more than reference, it's not as divergent as something like Port Eternity by C. J. Cherryh, the reincarnated characters do interact with the past directly at times, so I'm using it as an example.

Anyway most characters are either gay (umbrella term) or trans. Except the way trans characters are treated sucks majorly (in my opinion). I completely lost faith in book 1 after the introduction of Lamorak, a gender fluid knight who uses they/them pronouns. Merlin misgenders them and gets corrected by Kay, to which Merlin does this whole self flagellation routine about. Lamorak is also disabled, missing their left hand. (Why isn't it Bedwyr? Anyway not the point...) Lamorak gets no dialogue here whatsoever, all agency is completely stripped from them regarding their disability and their gender identity. Double whammy.

This is worsened when Percival gets introduced, as Merlin then makes a point of asking for pronoun clarification in the most obnoxious way possible. To which Percival takes no offense at the weird slight against his sibling and tells Merlin his pronouns.

But what about the sequel? Surely these two queer authors improved with time.....

Is this a joke? Is this the best way they could indicate the inclusive realm of Avalon? Why not just describe the women as they are, all shapes and sizes, and let the reader figure it out? The authorial intent would be so obvious by this point. Instead they say it… like that. Gag.

It only gets worse when Mordred is born. Then they're weird about a literal infant.

What in the bio essentialism? If the characters have been living in a future that’s broken out of the gender binary, the baby’s genitals should be irrelevant. Gwen’s literally saying Mordred is going to fulfill the evil prophecy because he was born with a penis. Even if this is intended to be a teaching moment, I hate how it’s handled. These quotes are in order of appearance in the books, so after the subtextual implications of all that came before, this last part really doesn’t sit right with me. Sorry I find these books completely abhorrent. They've won awards, they’re beloved by many. Maybe it's me. But no thanks.

Honestly, so long as you're not blatantly offensive with your handling of such things, I think you'll be fine. It's important to remember that even if one is part of a demographic they're depicting, it's always a good idea to hire sensitivity readers and take that feedback seriously. Not everyone will love your work, there will be advice you don't utilize, with time you'll be able to weed out the bad faith feedback, (the "all depiction is glorification" crowd) and ignore it. But it's so important to open oneself up to constructive criticism so you can learn and your work can develop into the best possible version of itself.

Now let's get to some ways you can go about researching a way to do this that fits in your story. It’s important to remember that throughout human history, many people lived stealth their whole lives and we don’t know about them for that reason, not because no transgender folks ever lived authentically and happily in medieval times. So it’s never impossible to incorporate a trans character into a story who experiences no direct violence, even if the world they live in isn’t presented as a queer utopia. The other thing is that public opinion regarding queerness, cross dressing, etc have varied a lot over the centuries and were vastly different depending on location. Not every “woman” found in armor would have been treated as poorly as Joan of Arc. So there’s lots of wiggle room for interpretation when you go about writing these narratives. The majority of my examples deal with the ruling class so they address the concerns you mentioned with added scrutiny a noble would face if they were to experiment with gender presentation compared to a commoner. I’ll be spoiling the plots of everything on the list to make clear why I’m suggesting them.

My initial advice would be to read medieval literature with queer themes followed by essays on the subject. The best examples I know of are:

Yde et Olive

Transmasc knight (good ending). 12th century French romance. Yde’s mother Clarisse died giving birth to her & later when Yde reaches maturity, her father makes advances, so she disguises herself as a man & flees. Yde becomes a successful knight & is married to the king’s only daughter, Olive. When it comes time to consummate the marriage, Yde must confess the truth of his identity to Olive, who vows to keep it secret. This is overheard by the king who then attempts to uncover Yde’s identity but is stopped by an angel who chastises the king for harassing such a good vassal. Then Yde is transformed into a man, the king dies, & Yde is able to have a child with Olive. They name him Croissant as if it couldn’t get any more French than it already was. Anyway the story alternates pronouns for Yde given the situation which is pretty neat & in the end he gets to live his best life! Yay!

Le Roman de Silence

Transmasc knight (bad ending). A 13th century French romance about a baby girl named Silence. Silence is raised as a boy because King Eban won’t allow women to inherit property. Like many medieval romances, the hero's adventure is often punctuated with personified emotions (Dame Fortune, Lady Love, etc) but Silence is tormented by Nature & Nurture as he comes into adulthood. He becomes a knight & eventually takes on an "impossible" quest, to capture Merlin, which supposedly can only be done by a woman. Content warning for the ending, it does not go well for Silence. Merlin reveals his backstory, & he’s forced to take a feminized version of his name, live as a woman, & marry the king to keep his lands.

Wigalois by Wirnt von Grafenberg

A 13th century German romance that follows Gawain’s son, Wigalois [Gingalain], but this ain’t about him. There’s a character Marine who fights as a knight. She’s consistently referred to with she/her pronouns, but she’s renowned for her knightly virtues & fights alongside the men in the war. She’s treated very well narratively & dies in battle after apprehending a high-value hostage. Everyone mourns her & there’s a big funeral held in her honor. So even if Marine never presented herself as a man the way Yde or Silence do, she provides an example of a female thriving in a male role. Food for thought.

Parzival by Wolfram von Eschenbach

Another German banger from the 13th century. This one’s about a cis male knight but Parzival has transmasc vibes. Trust me. Here’s my favorite article about it called The Clothes Make The Man - Parzival Dressed & Undressed by Michael D. Amey that really illustrates what I mean.

After that, you can check out these retellings:

The Story of Silence by Alex Myers

I bought this but haven't read it yet. It’s a retelling about the aforementioned Le Roman de Silence. This book uses neutral they/them pronouns to refer to Silence, which I can say from experience sometimes causes confusion with readers, so it's good to study how this author did it & determine if that method feels right for you. (If you ever decide to do something like that with a character.)

Spear by Nicola Griffith + Spear's Author's Note

I enjoyed this one, beautiful prose. It didn’t feel like the most comprehensive Grail Quest retelling, but Peretur can be interpreted as a butch lesbian or transmasc, it’s ambiguous. She only uses masculine pronouns when stealth, otherwise using she/her, but it has a happy ending! It’s firmly set in the era & felt authentic on that front while letting the queer characters relax. Peretur isn’t alone. (A/G/L enjoyers keep winning + sapphic lady of the lake ftw + the other hotties Peretur pulled.) Definitely worth checking out.

The Bright Sword by Lev Grossman

This book just came out in 2024. Including it here is already a spoiler given the topic but I’m going to spoil fully from this point on so ignore this if that’s a problem. This is the best example I can give for your reading/writing tastes based on the ask; Dinadan is a trans man. His transness isn’t revealed in the main character Collum’s pov, but in Dinadan’s backstory pov, opening in his childhood. He & his twin brother were sent to different schools but young Dinadan would leave the girl’s school to practice knightly skills with the fay, which retroactively explains why he has a fairy sword that Collum was admiring. In exchange for this training, the fay ask that Dinadan slay Merlin. Which he agrees to while never believing he actually can, but the wrath of the fay in the afterlife is worth his ability to live as a knight. I love how it was all handled firstly because Dinadan has a fighting style that works for his smaller frame & because every knight has a different fighting style (Dagonet’s is “If it sucks hit da bricks.”) Dinadan doesn’t stick out like a sore thumb yet his physicality is accounted for. Secondly Dinadan explains the lengths he goes to in order to stay stealth from obvious ones like binding his breasts to pretending to shave his face every couple days & wearing a packer. Later on, Dinadan’s secrets are revealed when he goes swimming in the ocean with Palomides (who evidentially already knew) & Collum joins them. Collum had no idea, which I think brings up an interesting point about all of this which also reminds me of Gawain not recognizing that Beaumains was Gareth—the power of expectation. Just as Gawain expected to find a kitchen boy & would have no reason to assume his brother (who hit puberty since they last saw each other) would be stealth in the kitchens so therefore didn’t recognize him, Collum expects to find men as knights of the Round Table, so when Sir Dinadan is introduced, & Collum had heard of him before, Dinadan’s stature & high voice don’t register to Collum as anything but traits that this guy Dinadan happens to have. Learning Dinadan’s secret in the presence of another knight who already knows & is chill about it also encourages Collum to be accepting too. So giving Dinadan at least one ally in his corner throughout the story went a long way. In the end Merlin, who can only be killed by a man (which is why Nimue had to settle for sealing him away) is stabbed by Dinadan. So it’s like a reverse Silence/Éowyn situation that Dinadan’s gender is affirmed in his ability to kill Merlin. This book also includes the part from Le Morte d’Arthur where Dinadan’s forced to wear a dress, which in this context is very transphobic, but that’s the point. It’s made better when Dinadan gets to go insano style on Merlin so he gets payback. Just a heads up about that.

Some fantasy/scifi that’s not Arthurian but may help, as Arthuriana is largely fantasy to begin with, this may help you determine where on the spectrum your taste/writing falls regarding the bending of reality/history to fit your narrative.

Orlando: A Biography by Virginia Woolf

1928 novel about a character named Orlando living during the reign of Elizabeth I. Orlando is born male, then at some point in his early adulthood, falls into a deep sleep from which he awakens the exact same person, now metamorphosed to be female. Orlando, for her part, adopts this new role immediately & keeps on moving. She lives for 300 years as such & has many adventures, including an instance where she then presents as a man to elude marriage. Transitioned so she could cross dress in the other direction. She would’ve done numbers on tumblr. Ultimately, Orlando does marry… a gnc sea captain! The success of their marriage is attributed to their similarities in gender non-conformity. Even though this book only remains in the late medieval era for the opening, I think it’s a poignant example of a transgender individual living their life in their time & still getting to enjoy themselves without excessive suffering that may provide lots of inspiration.

The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K Le Guin

1970 Hugo & Nebula award winning novel. A fascinating examination of gender from the point of view of a cis man named Genly Ai having to reconcile his interpretation of the gender binary when confronted with a society who operates outside that. His travels with ambisexual Estravan challenges what Ai understands about the universe. His ignorance forms the backbone of the narrative as he grows close to a person from this other society. Even if it’s not a medieval setting, it may help you develop a narrative voice regarding this subject you’re able to bring to your work. Also it’s just really good.

The Privilege of the Sword by Ellen Kushner

2007 Locus award winner, Nebula & Gaylactic Spectrum nominee. High fantasy medieval setting. Katherine is a country girl brought to the big city Riverside by her uncle the Duke where she’s offered the opportunity to train as swordsman (ie cross dress) instead of political marriage. She’s unsure of the reasoning behind her uncle’s motivations for doing this, but goes along with it & kicks ass. A preview is available on Google books (linked).

The Realm of the Elderlings by Robin Hobb

This is my favorite series ever. It spans 16 books published between 1995-2017. The fandom on tumblr & ao3 is hugely active. (Avoid tags to dodge major spoilers or check it out for amazing art & many quotes!) The series has many gnc characters in a fantasy medieval setting. First & foremost, The Fool, who’s in all the books & whose gender ambiguity is mentioned book 1, to which he says, “None of your business.” The character ever. Without getting too specific, there are several trans characters including gender fluid characters who will alternate between masc/fem presentation & pronouns. This is my favorite example of gender fluid characters in any fantasy I’ve read, especially since there are several & each feels unique. In The Liveship Traders trilogy, Amber coaches another woman how to hide her period while pretending to be a ship’s boy by using a sock, so if anyone finds the blood on it, she can say she cut her foot. Little things like that really deepened the realism in an otherwise fantastical story for me, because addressing those details answers questions my overly analytical mind would ask & wonder about if unacknowledged.

Lastly I'd like to suggest the article Armour of an Alienating Identity by Jeffrey Jerome Cohen. While it doesn't mention Parzival (the text), it does mention Perceval (the character), as well as Gareth Beaumains, Lancelot, Gawain, Yvain, and even Arthur himself. It goes on to reference endless examples to support its thesis including Greek heroes such as Achilles and Odysseus with references to many different medieval stories from Old English Beowulf to the Irish Ulster cycle to the works of Geoffrey Chaucer. Most (if not all) of the texts mentioned in this essay can be found on my blog for cross reference if you desire, although the article already contains many quotes.

Okay I think that’s all I got. I’ve given you a ton to think about and read. Ultimately I don’t think there’s a clean cut answer for this. Nuance, you know? Having hired an editor and many sensitivity readers myself, it really is just a professional a vibe check sometimes. You write what you want to the best of your ability, then other people weigh in, and you keep tweaking it until it’s as good as you can possibly make it. During development, and even in its final form, there will be people who don’t enjoy your story and that’s fine. It isn’t for everyone, it’s for you and your audience. No single experience in this life is the same so each fictional depiction emulating life will also be unique, there’s no “right” answer on how to write this or anything else, only the way you want to.

Hopefully now you have some tools to help you learn how best to express your vision. I know they gave me a lot of insight and ideas I lacked before when writing trans characters in my books. Thank you for trusting me with this question and good luck with your project! Take care! :^)

[clockwayswrites]

You all don't see this. Nope. Didn't write it.

WC: 1284, Masterpost CW: visit to a leath kink shop, mentions of sex work

Paulina held up her hand, looking at her freshly painted nails. “You, Nickie, are a goddess and an artist.”

“I know,” Nickie said smugly.

“Like, seriously, you could make bank,” Paulina said. She pulled out her cellphone to snap a photo. The crystals in the center of the flowers that frame the sugar skull flashed beautifully.

Nickie gave a little shrug. The muscle tank she worn slipped off her tan shoulder, revealing more of the over the top, bright red bra. “Considering it for after. Right now sex pays well, I got the body for it—”

“Hell yeah you do,” Paulina agreed.

“—and it let’s me look after my girls. But I might be putting money aside for a shop front, yeah.”

“When you open I will let anyone I know in the area to come to you,” Paulina said. “And come myself if I’m still haunting Metropolis. Got to visit my boo Danny.”

“Someone has to come keep him in line.”

“Hey!” Danny protested from where he was carefully painting Han’s nails a blinding magenta. He did just fine with himself these days.

“He’s mixed up with a bad crowed,” Nickie continued, completely ignoring Danny, “just like Han here.”

“I don’t even know why I’m here,” Han protested meekly.

Paulina flipped her hair. “Who do you think helped him get his bad crowd? Danny can’t dress himself worth shit.”

“I know,” Nickie said with a sigh. “I remember what he was wearing when he moved in.”

“Again- hey!”

“Don’t pretend like you don’t love your new gets.”

“That is true, I look amazing,” Danny said. He struck a pose as best as he could while sitting at a coffee table with nail polish in hand. He felt his bootleg Red Hood crop top ride up with the act, exposing a sliver of skin between it and his black joggers. “But I hate you for getting me hooked on lululemon, it’s stupidly pricey.”

“Good thing you have two sugar daddies then, ain’t it honey,” Nickie pointed out.

“Blessed life,” Danny said, finishing off the magenta polish with a flourish. He capped it before he started with the other hand to carefully remove the tape. His tongue peeked out of the corner of his mouth as he focused.

“You should get them something nice.”

Danny snorted. “What, with their own money?”

“Sure,” Nickie said, starting to clean up. “Doesn’t matter who’s dough bought it if it’s good fun for everyone.”

Danny paused in his work of revealing the highlighter yellow polish under the tape to look over to Nickie. “What? I don’t— ooh.”

Paulina just laughed at him, of course. Even Han chuckled which was frankly a little insulting.

Danny cleared his throat. “I, um, do you think they’d… like that?”

“Honey, I’ve seen how they are with you. Doesn’t have to be nothing cray either. You can start simple, just a little accessory.”

“Huh.”

“I, uh,” Han said, nervously, drawing everyone’s attention. “I know a place?”

At least Danny was able to follow how they ended up standing in a leather centric kink shop, even if it felt like a bizarre turn for his life to take. He looked at the harness wearing mannequin he was standing in front of and tilted his head.

“Who has the patience to get into that?”

“Well,” drawled the shopkeep who had appeared next to Danny so suddenly he was half tempted to think the other was a ghost, “for some people, getting their partner into the harness is half of the fun. The obedience, the touches, the control… the denial.”

Danny swallowed heavily. Huh.

“Hello my darling, bring in some friends?” the shopkeep asked and swanned over to kiss a blushing Han.

“I’m not sure what they are,” Han said with a weary sigh. They let the other pick up their hand and examine their bright nails. “But Danny here was thinking of picking up something on the… introductory side to treat his boyfriends with.”

“Oh well we can certainly help with that. I’m Liam, Han’s boyfriend,” the shopkeep said, holding out his hand.

Danny shook the hand. “Danny, like Han said.”

“He’s dating the Boss and the Boss’ boy,” Han explained.

“They’re his sugar daddies,” Paulina pipped in.

“And damn adorable,” Nickie said.

Danny released Liam’s hand to bury his face in his hands. “I hate you all.”

“No you don’t,” Paulina said. “Now, what do you have in mind for the blushing boy, Liam?”

“Well that’s something for him and I to talk about,” Liam said. He put an arm around Danny’s shoulder (though was really barely touching him) and guided him away. Over his shoulder he called, “Show them around, Han!”

When they had space and a tall display between them and the other’s, Liam stopped. “Now, best way for me to get you something good is for you to be honest with me. I promise, nothing you say to me is going to be something I haven’t heard before. I’m not going to judge you. You and your boys ever done anything like this before?”

Danny shook his head.

“So you’ve had sex but it’s been mostly vanilla?”

“Yep,” Danny said, the word coming out as a strangled squeak. He cleared his throat. “I mean, Red Hood keeps his helmet on so that’s not really… usual. We haven’t done much, in any combo.”

“But you like this idea?” Liam asked, motioning around them, “Or did they just bully you into coming? Because if that’s the case I can find you something cheap to buy you won’t feel bad about throwing away or you can come back and return it in a few days provided you keep it in it’s packaging.”

“I, um,” Danny picked at the edge of his hoodie as he glanced around the store from under his bangs. What Liam had said about the harness came back to mind. “Sometimes, like, not in bed, Jason will tell me to ‘stay’. And, um…”

“That does things for you.”

Danny nodded, feeling mortified.

“Not that odd at all. Now, there are a few ways we could go,” Liam said and started walking again. “Handcuffs and restraints are one way. Or rope, it’s an art form so one of your boys would have to be interested in learning, but it can be something special. Or, I think maybe for you… this is where we should start.”

They had stopped in front of a display of collars and leashes. There were more types than Danny could have ever dreampt up. There was leather of all colors and patterns. There were plain black and brown collars and bright colors with poppy cutouts and rich jewel tones with detailed filigree and earth tones with geometrics. They were lined with suede and velvet and fur. Danny itched to reach out and touch them.

“Yes, I do think we’re in the right area. Go ahead, you can touch. If nothing here works for you, you could always custom order something instead.”

Danny reached out and ran his fingers over one of the collars, thinking. If this was Red Hood, Danny would have to go custom order red and black. But really this was for Jason. Danny lingered on one that was lined in turquoise suede. The leather was a bold rust and turquoise patina on a delicate, detailed circle and diamond pattern. Brass circles studded across the pattern.

“You know, I think we have a leash that will match that one beautifully. Should we ring you up?”

-

When Jason walked in a few days later to find Danny sitting on his kitchen counter, swamped in one of Jason’s large shirts, and wearing the collar he nearly swallowed his tongue.

---

AN: So this is a thing that I've now written! Loved the response to the tease I post last night~ Danny has gotten ideas and Jason is gobsmacked. Don't worry, I'm sure he bought something for 'Red Hood' too. ^_~ (Collar 100% inspired by one of Big Cat Den Crafts)

I no longer tag people, but you can subscribe to the mastpost.

[thepromptswhisperer]

Meet Cute/Ugly Spring/Summer

A writes a message/draws something into the pollen on - what they assume is - their friend’s car when B appears and asks why they are touching their car.

A makes their garden presentable and runs into B over and over again in the same store. Seems like they too are picking out new plants/seeds. 

A watches a (soccer/baseball/etc.) game, loudly encouraging their team while bashing the rivals. The stranger standing/sitting next to them turns out to be related to the one person they criticized/booed/etc. the most. 

A ends up on a carnival ride with B, having been too preoccupied with their thoughts to notice that they’ve been mindlessly following a random stranger.

Allergy season causes A to tear up in public. A worried stranger approaches them and offers a tissue/their handkerchief.

Too caught up in a game with friends and focused on the ball/frisbee/etc., A walks right into someone’s laid-out picnic/falls over someone relaxing in the sun. 

In the festival haze, A mistakes a stranger’s tent for their own. 

A takes pity on B who is burying their friend’s lower half in the sand and offers a helping hand/to show them the right technique/to loan them a bucket.

Upon their return for the season, A, the undisputed Surf Champion in the area, discovers that someone new is now drawing everyone’s admiration. 

The new neighbor overhauls their garden and one of the chopped down trees falls onto A’s flower bed/vegetable patch.

A stranger becomes A’s ‘savior’ when they lure away the ducks that previously cornered them. Apparently, they were hoping to be fed. 

A stumbles upon that annoying cyclist that overtook them a while back after incessantly ringing their bell. Now, it seems they need help as they hurt themselves/have a flat tire/etc. 

A returns and climbs back into the hammock they previously shared with their friend. Only, it’s a stranger lying there, looking back at them. 

A gives up their spot in front of the stage by allowing B, who is shorter than them, to stand in front of them. 

When an insect nears them, A jumps up in a panic and hurries away. B, who sat separately but nearby, does too and flees in the same direction as A.

A plucks a beautiful flower from a garden, realizing too late that the homeowner saw them.

More:

➔ Meet Cute/Ugly Fall/Winter

[travelling-wanderer]

・﹒・ i hate you

Summary: It's been a while since you joined the digital circus landscape and had made friends with everyone despite the situation of never returning home. However, you could never get along with Jax, he was an asshole. He always annoyed you and pissed you off. Yet, why can't you get him out of your head?

Warnings: None

Pairing: Jax x GN!reader

Notes: Hi I'm back...ish

In the world stored on a computer that you now permanently resided in, it was hard to find a private place to just relax. Sure, it was pretty big, but get bored enough and needing a break from everyone, you're bound searching for a place to find some peace and quiet. That's what you did and you found a neat little alcove far away from the main stage in the tent and as the digital days went by, you found solace in it. It was your little hideaway from it all and for you to just be yourself. Sure, you had your bedroom, but anyone can just bother you, and not to mention- Jax has keys to everyone's rooms.

Jax. You hated that rabbit. He always went out of his way to piss everyone off and annoy them just for his entertainment. Especially you- he picked on you so much it got on your nerves, you needed space. So here you were, sitting and messing around with a bouncy ball, throwing it on the wall and catching it. He especially got on your nerves today as he thought it would be a good prank to scare you by coming up from behind and screaming "Boo!" while you were talking with Pomni.

Sighing, you caught the ball and stared at it, thinking about your new life here again. You often did here, but also made sure to not think about it too much, as you still valued your life. You don't even know how time was passing outside of here, was it a week? Two? Three months? Years? Caine does have a day and night cycle to at least keep some sense of time for you guys, but it wasn't enough to not make some go crazy.

Your mind kept drifting back to Jax though, no matter how hard you try to not think of him, he kept popping up in your mind unwillingly. You hate him, that's that, so why did he continually keep showing up in your mind? The things you kept thinking about him had slowly started to drift from hatred to having this strange...warm feeling in your chest. Your thoughts started to spiral as you realized you actually missed when he wasn't around. Why was that? He had nothing positive or say or do, yet you felt a strange sort of longing for him despite the last you saw of him was him trying to scare you. There was a draw that you had towards him, not understanding why, you dare say you almost...enjoyed his asshole self.

"Day dreaming now?" You didn't realize how much your head was in the clouds when the voice startled you, causing you to jump and swivel your head around to face the rabbit you were just thinking of. Shit. How did he find this place? How did he find you? Jax had a smug smirk on his face as he walked closer, watching you with his black eyes. Trying to act cool, you rolled your eyes and took in a huge breath, turning back around to mindlessly throw the ball. In all reality, your heart was still beating incredibly fast. Why now?

"Oh come on, the silent treatment? Really? This is where you go to hide away from everyone?" His monotone voice made you sigh, he was really insisting on pissing you off extra hard today. Taking a deep breath, you turned your head to see Jax walking and standing right next to you. You really didn't want to deal with him right now. Growling, you throw the ball at him, hitting him in the shoulder, causing him to yell out.

"Hey! That was rude ya know?” You could tell he was genuinely getting annoyed with you, which peaked your interest greatly. He was always an asshole and abrasive, sure, but rarely he actually got annoyed with anyone back.

"Oh THAT was rude? As if you don't tick me off at any given chance and this is the result of it" You scoffed and shuffled yourself so you faced the colorful wall of soft blocks, wishing he would just leave. Why didn't he leave?

"Oh please, don't even start. You talk about me all the time, don't think I don't know" You freeze, his words hitting you like a wave of ice cold water. How does he know? Sure, you rant to Ragatha and Pomni and Gangle but, they wouldn't tell him. Would they? No, they wouldn't. Taking a deep breath in, you stayed silent as you exhaled, thinking of how to respond without making a fool of yourself.

"Well, it's nothing pleasent, but you would know that since you seem to know everything. It's not my fault I can't get you out of my head" Shit. Why did you say that? Your heart started to beat faster as you watch him smile and chuckle, you're doomed.

"You think about me all the time, eh? For some reason I don't think its just about how much you hate me, am I right?" He leaned closer to your face, causing you gulp and shuffle backwards, but he kept the closeness and only followed you.

"N-no! It's just about how much I hate you, of course! Everyone hates you!" You really were trying to save this, but the wall hit your back and he closed in, placing both hands next to your head as he stared at you with his dumbass smug smirk.

"Oh really? Why are you nervous then? If you hate me so much, you would push me away right now. Go on, do it" For some reason, you just couldn't bring yourself to do that, the seconds ticked on as he waited patiently, chuckling when he realized you weren't going to storm off in a rage.

"Oh I freaking knew it. You have a crush on me! Hah! You disguise your stupid little feelings for me as hatred, oh that's hilarious" You began to grew frustrated again, this time you were also extremely flustered and in no way put together. He just had to be an asshole for anything, didn't he?

"Fine, I do have a crush on you, ok? But if you're going to act like that then I will" You did it. You accepted that you liked him. He was totally right, you were disguising your feelings for him with hatred. But his attitude made you push him away, causing him to slightly stumble as you pick up your bouncy ball and start to leave your now comprised space before you felt his large hand wrap around your smaller one. Turning your head, you saw as his face was full of panic.

"Wait! Don't go. I'm-I'm sorry, ok?" He sounded strained as he apologized, obviously not used to it. Looking at him, you felt conflicted because what if he just continues to act like a dick?

"Look, I don't know what your deal is, but-"

"But, my deal is that...I like you too, ok? I act rude because I don't know how to fricking show affection, got it?" You narrowed your eyes at him, wondering if he was being genuine as it was incredibly hard to know with him. Maybe you should give him a chance...maybe. Maybe you should.

"Ok, fine. Got it. So uh- what do we do now?" He lets go of your wrist and you rub it, he wasn't gripping hard but it was still fairly firm, and look at him. I mean, where DO you know now? After all that?

"Well, we could ya know...do a little making-" You slapped him playfully before smiling and chuckling, shaking your head now relieved that the tension was gone. It honestly felt freeing to finally admit that you liked him now that it was all over, you were just in very heavy denial about it.

"Yeah, we aren't there just yet, Rabbit"

[bbina]

picture perfect confessions ── p. wonbin

synopsis: in which after a painful series of unfortunate events, wonbin decides the right time to confess is when you are caught off guard genre: fluff, fluff and FLUFF warnings: wonbin being a pussy its almost intolerable, anton being a little shit, literally based off riize-wonderland word count: 5.2k... i did not expect this at all notes: i literally got carried away what the fuck

the long awaited trip to an amusement park planned by seunghan has commenced. the gang is all here to celebrate a long exhausting week of work and the such

"i haven't been in an amusement park for so long!" seunghan cheers as you all enter the gates of everland. twirling around to show his excitement

you laugh at his enthusiasm as sohee joins him and spins around

"hush children, let's calm ourselves" eunseok walks over to the youngsters in attempt to calm their excitement to which of course they boo and call him an old man for his lack of enthusiasm (earning a small smack from the older male in retaliation)

"soo.." you start, catching everyone's attention. "what's the plan?"

everyone gathers in a circle to discuss what everyone wants to ride first, taking all suggestions into consideration. seunghan, being the head planner of it all, firsts suggests that everyone goes to T-express which was a big rollercoaster as a little wakeup call for everyone

sungchan then suggests you guys should play carnival games first to "check gambling off the list first" so you guys could properly get rid off the feeling to waste some extra cash

but shotaro claims that carnival games should be played in between rides to keep the adrenaline going

you were just laughing along when you noticed wonbin a little quiet than usual. he usually was a big talker but for once, he was quiet. maybe a little too quiet for your liking

"you okay there, bin?" you ask, walking over to him to put your hand on his seemingly tensed shoulders.

wonbin freezes for a second before relaxing. he smiles sheepishly as he waves you off

"yeah. it's just its been a long time since i visited here" he says, a bread smile on his face as he attempts to hide his nervousness from hearing all the suggestions from the group

"well is there anything you want to do first?" you gestured to the the guys who were busy trying to one-up each other on what to do first

wonbin simply shakes his head no and keeps to himself

'weird' you thought to yourself but you simply brush it away. he was probably a little tired from the long subway ride which was totally normal

you go back to the circle who looked like they were drawing lots as a fair way of deciding.

"what are we deciding on?" you seamlessly jump into their conversation. seunghan wraps an arm around your shoulder and suddenly yells that you were gonna be the tie breaker between T-EXPRESS and DOUBLE ROCK SPIN

wonbin could feel his eyes pop out of their sockets hearing the two extreme ride suggestions but he wasn't just gonna admit that out loud. he was a pussy but he's not just gonna show that to everyone (mostly to you because the guys know damn well what a scaredy-cat he was)

"oh shit that's a tough decision" you can feel the adrenaline rush through your veins. the six guys look at you with excitement in their eyes. you can tell they were excited as you were

"T-EXPRESS all the way baby!" you cheer, jumping with your hands up in the air. everyone also cheers with your decision. "then we should do DOUBLE ROCK right after!" you continue, furthering the excitement of everyone. everyone minus wonbin who just felt like his soul is leaving his body

how was he gonna get out of this now?

you all rush to the line of T-EXPRESS but thanks to anton little treat of treating everyone to express passes, you lot were the first people in line.

as the rest of the guys were lining up, eager to get stamped on to get onto the ride, you see wonbin who seems to be kicking rocks by your peripheral vision

"binnie, you're not going?" you ask, voice laced with concern. again, he sheepishly shakes his head no

"i'm feeling a little nauseous from the subway ride from earlier. you guys can go ahead while i wait here" he says, straight up lying through his teeth.

you frown at this, expecting everyone to be hyped to ride the rollercoaster.

eunseok senses the weird atmosphere and reads wonbin like an open book. he laughs to himself seeing wonbin plead with his eyes to save his ass for now

"he probably slept for an hour again, y/n. don't worry he'll ride with us as soon as he gets over his motion sickness" eunseok asserts the situation. winking at wonbin who sighs in relief. he was gonna thank eunseok after the ride ends

wonbin does the same bread smile he did earlier and mumbles a little "sorry y/n"

you pout but let it go regardless. "okay, i understand. but could you hold my stuff for me please?" you say, giving him your purse. "i have some anti-nausea meds in my little emergency pouch inside. you can have some" you instruct wonbin who just nods and scurries you away since it was your turn to get stamped

"enjoy" you hear him say making you smile. you give him a thumbs up as you catch up with the rest of the group, leaving wonbin behind

"where's wonbin hyung?" you hear sohee ask, looking for wonbin among the sea of people. you sigh and explain that he feels a nauseous and opted to sit this ride out

at the mention of his "nausea" anton's ears perk up and giggles.

"ah wonbin's just sca–" anton gets interrupted by shotaro by clearing his throat. a little signal that you were in ear shot. he wasn't just gonna let bro be done dirty

you look at the two of them all confused. wonbin was what?

"y/n sit by me!" sohee exclaims, already claiming a seat at the cart he chose which was in the middle. to which you happily oblige. the seating arrangement was seunghan and sungchan, followed by you and sohee then shotaro and anton and finally eunseok who got to seat with a random stranger

and the ride starts briefly after

wonbin on the other hand, was waiting by the exit. your purse hanging off his shoulder as he watches the rollercoaster start to move up.

he grimaces at the thought of being on there in the first place but that thought is quickly overthrown by the thought of sitting next to you

how he wishes he wasn't such a scaredy-cat that he gets to experience something like this with you. not that he'd ever admit that though. he'd rather live through hell than to admit to his little crush he has on you (that of which the group knows about and teases him non stop)

but wonbin being wonbin, he takes the liberty of fishing your phone out of your purse and takes some aesthetic shots of the tall rollercoaster and the pretty sky blue sky. not forgetting to snap a couple of selfies of himself of course

he starts to hear the people on the ride screaming happily of joy as the rollercoaster goes on about its obstacles. he shudders at the mere thought of just being there.

after what seems like forever, the ride ends and the seven of you all walk out all jumbled up from the wind blowing everything out.

"holy fucking shit, holy fucking shit" shotaro chants, jumping up and down like a child

"you should've seen the look on eunseok's face. he was still like a stone" you double over laughing. remembering the look on eunseok's face just all straight and nonchalant

wonbin smiles at the sight of you enjoying yourself. his worries all washed away just by seeing you smile and happy

that is until, you announce that it was time to go to DOUBLE ROCK

wonbin has like 5 minutes to rack up another excuse on why he can't ride that. he was so engrossed with the thought of coming up with a plausible excuse that he didn't even hear you calling his name

"wonbin" you called, shaking his shoulder as he just stares at the ground with a blank face.

he instantly snaps back to reality a little "huh?" coming out of his lips

the rest of the guys all laugh seeing this interaction. how can he be so obvious and how can you be so oblivious

"i said sit next to me on DOUBLE ROCK" you beamed, linking your elbows together as you all walk to the next ride

wonbin can only gulp and pray to all the gods that are watching over him that he can find a way to excuse himself out of this little entanglement

by the time you get to DOUBLE ROCK, the operating manager announces that they need 7 people left before the ride starts

hearing this, wonbin can smile in complete bliss that he found a way to opt himself out of a ride.. again

"you guys can go on without me" he says abruptly, catching you by surprise.

"again? but you didn't ride with us on the first ride" you tried to reason, all you wanted to do today was enjoy the time with all your closest friends but how could you enjoy if one is left behind?

before wonbin could reply, the operating manager makes his final call for 7 people or else he was gonna find other people who are willing to fill those spots in

"i swear it's okay. i'm fine with being out here again. i'll make it up to you guys. scouts honor" wonbin reasons, looking at your face for a reaction.

the rest of the group all look at the wonbin skeptically as you begin to frown and huff

you simply sigh and leave wonbin behind as you tell the operation manager yourself that the 7 of you will take the seats. leaving wonbin behind all dumbfounded with your cold reaction

"oof that's gotta sting" sohee blurts out with you out of earshot earning a little smack again but this time by sungchan.

"sohee!" he scolds as he looks at wonbin with a worried expression.

all wonbin can do is just stand there all wide eyed with what just happened.

"how do i know if i just ruined my chances" wonbin says feeling dejected, totally not expecting that from you

shotaro, being the eldest and being the closest with wonbin daps him up and encourages him that he still hasn't technically ruined his chances with you

"i'm saying this now for good measure but you haven't ruined anything yet but if y/n is literally giving you the opportunity of your lifetime to be with her.. take it" shotaro advices, rubbing wonbin's back in attempt to cheer him up

wonbin can only wince at his advice and ushers him to get onto the ride since you guys were all waiting for him. he catches anton mouthing "man up" before the operators buckle everyone onto the ride

wonbin finds himself again alone by the exit waiting for everyone to finish. he's lowkey beating himself up for being such a pussy.

"god why am i so stupid" he cringes as the memory of you literally going past him like he was just a spectacle of dust replays in his head like a broken record

at the same time, he looks up to see where you guys were at and the ride was literally going in circles. just watching the machine go around and around is making his insides hurl

all he wants is to not embarrass himself in front of you

wonbin hears the machine go quiet indicating the ride was over and watches the crowd make their way to the exit. he waits patiently for the rest of you guys to come out

without another word, you silently grab onto the strap of your bag and sling it off his shoulder and carrying it yourself. walking ahead of the group to find the nearest food stall, completely ignoring wonbin

seunghan and sohee can only make "oooh" sounds as they watch wonbin walk miserably beside them

"couple fight.." anton comments, making eunseok and shotaro laugh.

"shut it" wonbin hisses, eyes following your frame. you had a straight face on which was a solid indicator (at least to wonbin) that you weren't in the mood to talk

seunghan then slips his arm over wonbin's shoulder, giving him a little side hug as his way of being encouraging to his friend. "it's not the end of the world yet, hyung" he says

"with the way you're saying, it probably is!" wonbin sasses, side-eyeing seunghan who just laughs loudly

"did she say anything though?" wonbin hushes, his mood turning a whole 180

sungchan who was listening the entire time butts in the conversation. "nothing. just grumbling on why you're such a killjoy" he jokes, making wonbin even feel worse than he already was

"am not!" wonbin tries to defend himself but he just looks like a sore loser. in retrospect, he kinda was a killjoy and he hated how he just ruined your good mood

after riding two extreme adrenaline filled rides, everyone was obviously hungry for some snacking. you all find yourselves in front of a food stall that sells corn dogs and churros.

you're sat next to eunseok and anton with wonbin in front of you who looks like a puppy who just got kicked. everyone eating silently with the occasional "can you pass me some ketchup?"

wonbin simply munches on his hotdog as he waits for you to talk to him. he honestly looks so miserable that it's killing everyone

anton who finds all of this hilarious has a little idea in mind.

"y/n, do you wanna share this churro with me? i'm kinda full" anton offers oh so innocently, handing you his barely eaten churro.

wonbin raises his eyebrow at this. what the fuck was anton doing

he doesn't miss the mischievous glint in anton's eyes as he smirks in front of wonbin

like a pawn being drawn in. you of course cheerily say yes and take the said churro from anton.

"thanks tony. you're so sweet!" you chirp, happily munching on the churro.

wonbin just felt like he got shot. how dare anton do this to him. how dare anton tease him like that.

"jesus christ.." eunseok mutters, face palming at the whole ordeal

something in wonbin just snapped. he wasn't gonna take this shit much longer (he can't take this shit anymore)

"who wants another corndog? on me" wonbin proposes, in attempt to win you over anton and his half eaten churro.

and like a pack of wild hyenas who just preyed on some innocent animal, the group all raises their hands. all except you

"me wonbin hyung!"

"two corndogs and a churro please hyung"

"me! i'll accompany you"

"was waiting for someone to buy another one finally"

the group all talk over themselves but wonbin is fixated on you and your request (if you even had any)

hearing no response from you, wonbin decides to call your name

"what about you y/n? want anything?" he asks, hopeful you'll talk to him

but to his dismay, you simply shake your head no and motioned to churro anton gave you in hand.

wonbin just felt the remaining pride he had in himself dissolve into thin air. he just wants to air everyone in the area out to get himself out of this painfully awkward situation

"oh.. uh... okay..!" wonbin stammers, getting up from the bench and going to the stall to order the food his friends all asked to get. the worker eyes him weirdly as he shakily hands in his card to pay for the food. this day cannot get any worse than this

after he pays, he calls out for someone to get the food back to the table. sohee, sungchan and shotaro offer to help while the rest stay at the table with you

"what's up with him today?" you ask outloud, not caring who hears your question.

seunghan and anton could only laugh at your question. you make a confused sound at their reaction. what was so funny?

"just wonbin being wonbin" eunseok remarks

"that doesn't answer my question" you retaliate. not liking the feeling of the uncertainty of eunseok's answer

"i'll answer that! wonbin hyung–"

before anton can even finish, wonbin slams the tray of food at the table, startling you and anton in the process

"we're back! here's the food. enjoy." wonbin sounds like he was gritting his teeth as he glares at anton who was obviously enjoying every single moment

not up for this weird shit much longer, you shrug and drop the subject as you wait for the boys to finish up eating

after having a hearty meal, you all walk around the amusement park to let the food digest as you decide which ride to go to next.

you all pass by some little carnival games and decide to splurge a little. even having a competition on who could get you a stuffed animal from the prizes

but of course being the little losers (your losers at that) that they were. they didn't win you any big flashy prizes. it was wonbin who won you a little keychain as one of the consolation prizes

"here" wonbin says, attaching the keychain he won with his hard work on your bag. he smiles as the keychain makes a little bell sound as it jingles around.

still feeling a little upset at him for being such a killjoy and sitting out on two rides, you only give him a half-assed smile. "thanks"

you don't miss the frown that flashed on his face for a second before he walks over to sungchan to argue about something.

now you were beginning to feel a little bad for your attitude. he did say he was feeling nauseous earlier but in your defense, you just wanted to spend the day with him by your side

you were about to apologize til shotaro says he sees a haunted house up ahead and he wanted to go which excites the group as they were feeling a little bored and wanted to go on another ride

wonbin gulps and feels a little lightheaded when he stares at the haunted house ride right in front of him. now that you were all rested and ready to go on another ride, he can no longer excuse reason out on why he can't go in since all you had to do was walk through the maze

sungchan being the matchmaker he was, proposes an idea that everyone takes turns in pairs to go insde so you guys wouldn't cause much ruckus as you were fairly a large group. he quickly groups people into two. shotaro and eunseok being the eldest, him and seunghan, and of course the youngest consisting of sohee and anton

which leaves you and wonbin left to be the pair

"dude you're a genius!" seunghan pats his back, sensing the little plan sungchan had in mind

you reluctantly go up to wonbin, already expecting that he was gonna tell you that he wanted to sit this one out.

"gonna sit this one out too?" you raise a brow at wonbin, ready to hear his excuse for this one. you watch him open his mouth and you were ready to hear the words "you guys can go" but instead you were met with,

"nope. i'm joining you guys this one" wonbin declares, putting on a brave a face hearing gasps from everyone, but you. he instantly feels a little better seeing how your face lights up

"finally! i was literally gonna call you a killjoy this time if you were gonna sit this one out" you gushed, feeling excited that wonbin was finally gonna join in the fun.

with the way you said that to wonbin, he feels like he got punched in the gut but quickly dismisses the feeling. he looks around to see the knowing grins and smirks from his friends

he turns to sungchan and mouths, "i owe you big time" to which of course sungchan gives him a thumbs up. sungchan can be nice sometimes and those times are now

you guys draw lots again to see who goes first and goes last and of course you and wonbin had to go last. not that you minded, its the thought of finally enjoying a ride with wonbin that counts.

the youngests go first and you can hear anton's screams of despair inside, causing all of you who were outside to crack up. after the youngests go, it was sungchan and seunghan then followed by shotaro and eunseok and finally it was you guys' turn

"you ready?" you ask wonbin behind you who was as pale as a ghost.

"y-yeah. ready as i'll ever be" he breathes out, his heart beating faster than ever.

the guys all wish you a good luck with a little comments on how the ride is oh so scary that wonbin might carry you outside (they mean the other way around)

and thus you two enter the horror house.

not even fully inside the house, wonbin starts screaming as some air blows on his face.

"wonbin!" you laughed, totally not expecting this from him and his cool guy image he always had.

"what? oh the scream? i was just scaring the ghosts away" he says shamelessly, attempting to cover up the fact that he was 100% scared shitless right now

you guys carry on further and further into the house. you try to block out wonbin's little outbursts sometimes when the people working inside were scaring you guys

when you reached the hallway where it leads to the makeshift morgue, a scary thing pop outs and literally scares wonbin. so much that in reflex, he reaches out for you and hugs you tightly

by then you feel him shaking. you look up at him to see his eyes closed tight. you almost wanted to laugh but with the way he was quite literally trembling, you can't help but feel worried for him.

"it's okay bin. it's not real" you try to reassure him but he can only whimper in response

you took it upon yourself to guide the two of you out of this horror house.

luckily for you guys the morgue seems to be the last obstacle left inside the ride so you wrap your arms around wonbin as you guide him to the end of the line.

the boys outside were busy chitchatting on the state of wonbin inside knowing damn well what was bound to happen

"do you think he's okay in there?" sohee ponders outloud, imagining the different outcomes.

"ehh so and so" anton comments, giggling to himself

"how much are we betting that y/n is the one wearing the pants and holding him" seunghan proposes to the group, stifling in his laughter

"double it and give it to the next person" shotaro adds, making the group laugh

"i think he can manage" sungchan adds, "his pride is literally on the line"

"guys they're done" eunseok says, seeing you waving your hand with wonbin in your arms

what finally feels like forever, you find yourself out of the horror house with wonbin still holding onto you for dear life.

"bin, we're out. you can open your eyes now" you say softly as you pat his head. wonbin takes a peak and lo and behold. you two were out of that hell hole! barely even noticing your arms wrapped around him

"wonbin hyung.. i thought you were better than this" was the first thing he hears and of course it had to be from anton. wonbin fully opens his eyes and starts to register everything

you were holding him

you had your arms wrapped around him.

you, y/n, his crush, is holding him, park wonbin.

wonbin short circuits as he jumps from your touch. "woah! careful there" you say, catching his arm as he steadies himself. he can't believe that you caught him lacking. the mere fact that you had to hold him til you were out of the house sends him over the edge. he just wants a hole to swallow him whole

you watch as wonbin turn red. you could only laugh to yourself while thinking how cute he was. you never wanted to take care of him more than now

without another word (aside from the boys' teasing wonbin for being such a pussy) you all were on your way to the gift shop as the day is about to end

everyone was busy looking at all the souvenirs they wanted to buy. you were by the stuffed animals section when you feel someone next to you.

it was wonbin

you smile at him as you continue to touch the toys in front of you.

"ooh this one is so soft and cute" you comment, hugging a big black cat plush. you take a good at it before showing it to wonbin.

"it kinda looks like you" you giggle, eyeing both wonbin and the cat plush. wonbin takes a quick look at the plush and copies the face making you laugh

"do you want it? i can buy it for you" wonbin says, checking the price tag by its tail. his eyes widened at the price which was ₩20,000. seeing his reaction you shake your head no

"no, it's probably a little expensive and i can order one online" you say, putting the plush back to the shelf you got it from

wonbin mentally facepalms with the way he reacted. he shakes his head and gives himself a pep talk about money will always go back but shit like this doesn't

"no it's fine ! if you want it i can buy it for you" he reasons, grabbing the plush again to show it to you. even making it dance

you honestly didn't want wonbin spending a lot on you and you hate the feeling of owing someone something but the plush was too cute and who knows when you'll be back here in everland with wonbin again?

"i'll let you buy me that if you let me buy you something too!" you propose to which wonbin agrees with.

you two wander around the gift shop til he decides what he he wanted to get. in the end he wanted to match headbands with you. wonbin chose a bunny headband and with that you two go to the counter and pay

the rest of the guys sees this and whistles at your matching headbands and the big plush wonbin was carrying.

"hey why are you two the only ones matching?" sungchan asks, knowing damn well why you two were matching.

"bunny headbands are taken go look for something else" wonbin counters making you laugh.

"dude chill" seunghan has his hands up in defense making the rest of the group laugh.

"yeah. that's what i thought" wonbin sasses, nudging your shoulders and grins at you

the guys carry on and buys their own headbands before heading out of the giftshop

"wait can we go to that photobooth?" you suggest, seeing a big 'life4cuts' sign. the guys chorus "of course!" before you guys rush over to the empty photobooth (after paying of course)

you guys take lots of pictures before printing them out. it was 4 pics in one and you thought it was the cutest thing ever.

the group was about to move on to the last agendas inside the park before wonbin pulls you aside.

"do you.. perhaps... wanna take another photobooth picture again.. but just the two of us....?" wonbin asks, hesitating a bit as he thinks of 299792 ways this could go. you could reject him, you could call the guys again, you could–

"i would love to" you smile, feeling a little blush creeping up your cheeks.

"i'm gonna go to the bathroom for a bit. you guys can go ahead!" you yell over to the boys who had no idea you and wonbin weren't walking behind them

with that out of the way, you and wonbin sneakily go back to life4cuts to take your pictures

"so how do you want our pics to go?" you ask as you input your money while deciding on what frame you should use

"we can do a normal pic then we can do whatever for the rest?" wonbin notes, mentally preparing himself for what he was gonna do. he was gonna confess his feelings to you

you hum in response, liking the idea. you opted for the default white film strip option so you could place it on the back of your phone case.

while waiting for the machine to process your money, wonbin speaks up

"i'm sorry for being such a pussy today" wonbin apologizes. "i know i ruined your mood earlier and i feel really bad i'm just scared of the rides and i didn't want you to see that so i'm sorry"

you turn around to see him pouting. how can you ever be mad at him?

"i realized that along the way and i'm sorry too.. for ignoring you earlier. i should've known better." you also apologize which causes wonbin to panic

if anything it was him who feels the need to say sorry. he can never be upset at you too

"then we're both sorry then" he jokes, "turn that frown upside down" he says with his infamous satoori accent and pokes your cheeks making you smile and blush

"you're so cheesy, wonbin" you laugh, hiding your blush from him

wonbin suddenly feels like its hot as fuck at the moment. especially with the close proximity. this feels intimate, maybe too intimate.

the machine dings and a timer pop up at the screen meaning the photos were about to be taken.

"it's starting!" you say all excitedly as you lean closer to wonbin to take the first picture.

"say cheese!"

the camera flashes and captures the first photo. looking good so far. now it was time to take a wacky picture.

you both watch the machine in front of you for the timer to pop up but it seemed like it was lagging. wonbin takes this as an opportunity to finally confess

"i have something to tell you"

you hum, waiting for what he was gonna say

you look up at him since he suddenly turned quiet. you see him looking down at you with the softest gaze you've ever seen.

"i like you"

and you hear the camera click. that was the second picture.

"i've been waiting for you to say that" you breathed as you jump to hug him. just in time for the third picture to be taken.

"what?" wonbin says in complete utter shock. you like him too?

"yes wonbin. i like you too" you professed, pulling back a bit to look at his shocked face.

wonbin hears the timer ticking and asks, "can i kiss you?"

you smile widely and nod your head yes, without wasting another second wonbin crashes his lips against yours just as the camera flashes. taking the fourth and final picture.

he pulls away just in time for the photos to print out. both faces beet red and breathing heavily. too stunned to say anything

let's just say you two walk out of that photobooth with hands intertwined with a matching photostrip at the back of your phones.

bonus:

"what's taking them this damn long" eunseok taps his foot impatiently. they were just outside the carousel ride, waiting for the two of you to come back from the bathroom

"did wonbin hyung take a post fear clarity shit" anton wonders, earning a hefty laugh from sohee who found the way he said 'shit' so hilarious

"maybe they got lost– oh my god ARE THEY HOLDING HANDS?!" seunghan spots you and wonbin walking towards them hand in hand with the biggest smiles on your faces

you skip towards the 6 guys waiting with wonbin behind you.

"sorry we took a while. we got lost along the way" you try to lie but the smile on your face says it all. they also don't miss the little photo strip on the back of wonbin's case

"i'm taking this as a sign that wonbin finally manned up" shotaro teases seeing that you two were now holding hands

"it was picture perfect!" you expressed, showing off your phone case that had the pictures of you and wonbin. the boys all gasp and made gagging sounds when they see the picture of you and wonbin kissing.

"i'm expecting a big meal after this" sungchan rubs his tummy to which wonbin rolls his eyes and mutters a string of "yeah yeah i know now all of you shut up!"

"we didn't even say anything!"

[apollyonsdarksecrets]

Knight in Cowboy boots

Joel Miller x Fem!reader

Summary: emotions and buried feelings are reviled when Joel protects you from a drunk ex boyfriend

Warnings: SMUT (Minors DNI 18+ ONLY), Friends to lovers, pre-outbreak, alcohol, fighting, swearing, blood, fingering, p in v (unprotected), cream pie, pet names, maybe one Y/n I tried not to use any because I know some people don’t like it.

Word count: It’s long boo, lmao.

A/N: Y’all tumblr has some kind of hold on me because I read one Pedro Pascal fic and now I want him to pin me to the bed and have me call him daddy 😭 #hornyonmain if you like this check out my other stories for more spicy fun 🥰

Joel Miller Master List

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“I don’t know Sally, I just… how did I not see it? Everything was great, at least I truly thought it was…” You sigh, slumping back further into your friends couch, swirling the wine in your glass.

“I knew there was something wrong with him! He always seemed so sleazy.” Sally scoffs, crossing a long leg over the other, shaking her dirty blond hair.

“Your husband is the one that set me up with Michael.” You retort, propping your chin on your hand with a sigh, you stare out the window, the party in the house was at its peak, people from around the neighborhood mingling, laughing, and sharing a good time as you and your life long best friend discuss your most recent disaster at dating.

“I never said he was a smart man.” You snort, shaking your head when movement outside catches your attention. Your eyes widen slightly, spine straightening as you catch sight of your older neighbor walking towards the house. His hands are shoved into his pockets, head tilted down slightly as he walks. He only peaks up when he reaches the walk way, face illuminated in the moonlight.

Joel Miller. The man you’ve not so secretly pinned for since moving to this neighborhood two years ago.

Your head whips around to Sally, “You didn’t tell me Joel was coming!” You gape at your friend who just shrugs a thin shoulder, taking a sip of her drink with a mischievous smirk tugging at her lips.

“I didn’t?”

Of course Joel would be invited, he’s known Sally and Tim since they moved here and had become fast friends with the couple. You begin to fidget with your outfit, regretting wearing something so basic as you tug your top down slightly, displaying more of your assets. Sally snorts beside you. “To much?”

Before she can answer her husbands loud laugh fills the air followed by the clinking of beer bottles and other guests raised voices in greetings. You turn just as the two men walk through the living room’s archway and smile brightly when Joel’s chocolate eyes land on yours. “Hey there.”

“Hey there yourself, haven’t seen you around in a hot minute darlin’.” His draw makes something inside you tick, cheeks tinting pink as the two men sit in the arm chairs opposite of you and Sally.

“You know me, hard work no play.” Joel laughs at that, tilting his beer to his lips and you force your gaze to your glass, trying and failing to not look like you were checking him out as he stretches his long denim clad legs out in front of him.

“How’s Sarah?” Sally asks, giving you time to collect yourself, the sight of the man almost always turning you into a fumbling school girl.

“She’s good, over at a friends house right now.”

“Oh so it’s just you tonight?”

“Just me.” Joel doesn’t look to Sally when he answers, eyes trained on your flushed face drinking you in.

You all spend the next hour talking about work, life, family, all the minor things in between. It’s great, you’ve missed your friends, work prioritizing most of your free time more often than not, that you never have time for simple things like this.

“I’m going to pour myself another glass, does anyone need anything?” You ask as you stand, a simultaneous no resonates from the group, Joel smiling at you with a tilt to his head that makes your knees weak.

You find the kitchen deserted, everyone either out back enjoying the table top fire or have already left for the evening. You’re humming a tune to yourself, picking through the numerous bottles for something that looks good when an arm snakes around your waist.

Nearly jumping out of your skin you push the offending appendage away and spin around, coming face to face with your now ex-boyfriend Michael.

He definitely wasn’t invited.

“What the hell are you doing here?” You hiss, stepping away only to collide with the counter top.

Michael laughs like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. His normally styled blond hair is tussled, blue eyes glazed over as he leers down at you. “Um, partying?” HIs words are slurred and he stinks of alcohol, your nose scrunching at the pungent smell.

“This isn’t that kind of party, and I don’t believe anyone invited you.” You glare up at him, nearly a foot of distance makes him taller and easier for him to crowed into your space when he takes a wobbly step closer.

“A party is always an invite. You know that sugartits.” The nickname makes you cringe, the feeling of being trapped between a drunk and a hard spot making you antsy. You and Michael dated for just under a year, everything was fine, fun, romantic even until his secret habit of getting too drunk and sticking his dick into anything with a nice set of tits came to light.

“You’re drunk, how the hell did you even get here? No no i don’t want to know, just get away from me and go home.” You move to push past him, anger and resentment bubbling in your guts, but the man in front of you has another idea.

“Who the fuck do you think you are talking to me like that?” Michael grabs your wrist, twisting until you yelp in pain. “You’d think after being with me for so long, you’d learn a little bit of respect, woman.” He shoves you into the counter, your side hitting the granite so hard you lose your breath. “Do I need to teach you a lesson?”

Fear takes root deep in your chest, freezing you to the spot as Michael's hand raises above his head, ready to strike you when a booming voice fills your ears, stopping him in his tracks.

"HEY!"

Michael's head whirls around, his grip lessoning, to find Joel and Tim standing in the doorway, Sally peeking from behind their shoulders.

“Back off man, we are having a private conversation.” Michael spits, teetering on his feet. Everything is tense and silent for a second, Joel’s eyes lock with yours, fear so clearly written across your face, and that’s all he needs.

The older man storms forward, arm back, and swings for Michael’s face, a direct hit that sends your ex stumbling backwards, freeing you as he covers his bleeding nose. You run to Sally’s open arms, and Joel doesn’t stop swinging, barely giving Michale time to react before he’s on the floor.

You’re crying, yelling for Joel to stop as Tim and another man rush forward, struggling to separate the two as a crowd forms at the patio door. By the time Joel is hauled away, the man lays limp on the ground, groaning unintelligibly. Joel's face is red, chest heaving, staring at Michael below him, shaking off the two men holding him.

“I see you around her again and it will be the last fucking thing you do.” Joel’s voice is haunting, sending shivers down your spine.

You push away from Sally, grabbing onto Joel's shirt with shaky fingers. He turns to you, the look of hatred melting into concern. "Are you okay?"

"Am- Am I okay?" You ask incredulously, eyebrows pinched.

“I think y’all should go, I’ll get him out of here just…” Tim is rightfully upset, hands in his hair as he stares down at his friend, blood splattered across the white tile of the kitchen, and the rest of the guests are visibly tense.

“I’m sorry Tim… it had to be done.”

Tim sighs, nodding but says nothing more. Joel nods back, flexing his hand by his side, before taking your arm turning you towards the door.

“Come on, I’ll walk you home.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Is… Is your hand okay?” It’s the third time you’ve asked since getting to your house, this time peeking around the bathroom door with a cup of coffee for him. Joel insisted on cleaning himself up instead of your request to take him to the ER, when you saw how bloody and bruised his knuckles were.

“I’m sure darlin’. Don’t fret over me.” He holds up his hand, still bruising but no longer bleeding, wagging his fingers, showing you he’s alright, before wrapping some gauze and tape around it. You lean into the door frame, staring at the steam drifting up in front of you.

“I… I can’t thank you enough for what you did, Joel… I don’t know how I can repay you.” You feel meek and miserable for what happened, that anyone would get into a fight over you. You keep thinking about how you should of prevented it, instead of letting it go that far. “I’m so sorry it got to that point, I should have done something.”

Joel leans in beside you, brushing his fingers against your shoulder, gaining your attention. You glance up, caught off guard by how close he suddenly is, eyes warm and inviting like the heat radiating off of his body, this close you can see the gray streaks starting to pepper his hair and the lines of crow's feet by his eyes. “Don’t talk like you caused any of this. I’d do it again if it meant keeping you safe.”

Your heart flutters, a small smile twitching your lips as you dip your head again. “What a knight in shinning cowboy boots you are.” Teasingly, you poke his chest, unable to bring yourself to meet his gaze. Joel just smiles, taking the cup from your hands and turning to set it on the bathroom counter.

“I thought knights usually get a kiss for saving the damsel in distress.” His hand cups your cheek fully, tilting your head back up until you're forced to meet his eyes, his words sinking into your body, popping off your nerves like fire, setting you ablaze.

“That only happens in fairytales.” You breathe, relaxing into the stroke of his thumb along the apple of your cheek, watching his eyes dance back and forth between your own. Joel leans farther in, noses a hair width apart.

"How’s this for a fairytale?" His whispers all since of thought lost as he press forward, brushing your lips against his in the most tentative kiss that you barely registers it. You smile though inviting and wanting, and his hand slips to the back of your head drawing you deep.

Your eyelids droop, hands coming to rest on his chest, leaning in closer as heat coils low in your stomach, arousal swimming through your blood making you groggy and tipsy. His lips mold to your own perfectly, maybe a little chapped, the stubble of his beard bristling at your skin causing you to whimper. Joel pulls you further into the bathroom, leaning back into the counter bodies flushed as your hands slip to his neck, holding yourself to him.

In this moment it’s just you and him, the party is forgotten, the fight, the fear, the fucking blister on your ankle from walking two blocks in heels, is all forgotten. Joel doesn’t even care when he grips your waist with his injured hand, the gauze pulling tight across the cuts, scratching his palm, irritating and relentless but far out of his mind.

The kiss slowly turns more desperate, your fingers tangling into the hairs at the back of his head, his hips pressing against your own, and when he pulls away for air you’re kissing his jaw, his cheek, his neck, having waited two years you weren’t passing up the opportunity now.

Joel groans softly, eyes pinched, need shooting through his body with every open mouth kiss you place. He wraps his fingers in your hair, tugging your head back gently earning a whimper of disappointment. You look up at him, eyes glazed over, arousal humming through your body so fiercely you think you might cry.

“Let me take you to bed, I ain’t waited this long to fuck you in a bathroom.” Your breath catches on a moan, a glimmer of defiance shooting through you as you eye him up and down. You can never make it easy for yourself.

“The bathroom is where most house hold accident happen.” You snip back, beaming as he rolls his eyes, the corner of his mouth lifting in a suppressed smile.

“Why did I punch a guy for you again?” Your bark of laughter sends him over and he’s walking you out of the bathroom into the hall. “Bedroom.” You point over his shoulder and he’s lifting you off of your feet, wrapping your legs around his middle.

“B-because you were protecting my dignity?” You giggle, grabbing his face and peppering kisses across his lips and cheeks. You don’t think you’ve ever seen Joel smile this much, your heart feeling like it might burst just from the sight.

“Dignity… right.” He stops at the foot of your bed with a cheeky look that makes you raise an eyebrow.

“What are you thinking?”

His response is hoisting you higher before dropping you, unceremoniously onto the bed with a loud screech. “Joel!” You’re laughing, trying to scold him and failing miserably.

Joel climbs onto the bed above you, fitting himself between your legs and caging you, forearms resting on the mattress by your head. Your laughter sticks in your throat, heart rate picking up as the reality of situation settles over the two of you. “I can always take you to dinner first.” He jokes, hoping secretly that isn’t what you’d want.

“If you make me wait one more day Joel Miller I swear I will have a conniption.” You mock threaten wagging a finger in his face. He smiles, taking your hand and kissing your wrist gently.

“I’ll give you what you want baby.” His teeth nip your skin, staling your breath making your thighs squeeze his. “Yeah, I’ll give you what you want.” He breaths against your skin, goosebumps lifting the hairs on your arms.

You whimper slightly, breathy and thin, hooded eyes watching as he kisses up your arm and to your neck, forcing your head back so he has more room. He bites gently at your sweet spot, gauging how you react, which movement, kiss, or bite draws the most noise from your lips.

“Joel… mmmm…” Your hands slip under his shirt nails leaving a trail of red up his back that has his hips bucking slightly, groaning into your ear.

“Gonna be the death of me pretty girl, ya know that?” He asks, voice laced with arousal, leaning back to look at you under thick lashes as he bucks his hips against yours.

All you can do it whimper in response, bringing your lips to his and kissing him messily, all teeth, and spit like you both are horny teenagers all over again. Joel’s tongue slips into your mouth, taking dominance over your own and it makes you let out a noise that will be seared into Joel’s brain for the rest of his life.

He breaks away suddenly, ripping his shirt over his head and you’re following suit, shimming out of the tight material letting it fall to the floor as your hands find the expanse of his chest. He has defined muscles, years of manual labor under his skin that makes your mouth water, his body just a little softer with age but an underlying strength you’ve already witnessed twice tonight. The man is gorgeous.

“Need you Joel… please I need you.” You beg, trailing your hands down to his jeans tugging at the rough material, earning a chuckle.

“We’ve got all night, darlin. No need to rush.” He scolds mockingly, his own fingers working at the button of your skirt, yanking it over your ass and down your legs. He stops to take you in, hands pressing your hips down, thumbs brushing over the elastic of your simple black cotton panties. “Fuck… you’re beautiful.”

And you’re spinning in drunken bliss from those two words, Joel Miller thinks you are beautiful.

“Up.” He commands and who are you to say no? Your panties join the pile, bra following shortly after, until you are laid out, bare and vulnerable before him.

And Joel takes his time, thorough with his exploration, caressing your body with burning hands. His palms cup your breasts, tweaking your nipple gently, watching your reaction for what feels the best before moving on. Hands smooth down the valley of your soft stomach, kneading your flesh, making you shiver and squirm.

“Don’t go running away from me now.” He whispers, cupping your ass and dragging you closer, legs spread wide over his hips. You keen, the apex of your desire pulsing from being manhandled to where he wants you, and Joel notices with a dark smirk.

His hands slip down the inside of your thighs and you hold your breath, desperate to feel him touch you where you want him the most. And when he does, callused thumb swiping through your soaked lips, your back bows, eyes closing as a near pornographic moan flys from your mouth.

“J-Joel…” you gasp, his thumb circling your clit before dipping back down pressing into your opening. “Ah… please… please…” Bucking your hips you search for more friction, whining into the air head pressing into the mattress.

“Such manners.” You whimper louder as the muscles in your stomach tighten, catching your lip between your teeth. “Does that mean you’re gonna be a good girl for me? Do as I say?”

“Yes… yes, I’ll be good, Joel.” You whine, warm embarrassment filling your belly, hands curling into the blankets below you. Joel smiles watching your hips twitch as he swipes his thumb back up circling your clit again before sinking a thick finger into your heat, your slick walls clamping around him. The moan you let out goes straight to his cock, making it twitch and push against the confines of his jeans.

“Yeah… I know you will be.” He whispers, adding another finger, pumping into you slowly, curling his fingers searching for that mark that will have you melting underneath him. “So tight baby, have to stretch you out if you wanna take my cock.” He presses his hand down on your stomach, trapping you as his thumb rubs circles into your clit, his fingers working faster and you mewl and cry his name, punctuated with a few ‘yess’ and ‘please’

Joel hits a spot deep inside your gummy walls that’s leaving you breathless, pussy starting to spasm as he draws you towards your orgasm faster than you’ve ever experienced before. He keeps that same pace, flexing his fingers, hurtling you towards the peak of your orgasm.

“Don’t stop! Please don’t stop!” You beg, eyes shut tight, knuckles white, body flushing with white heat, making your jaw go slack, thighs shaking uncontrollably as you teeter on the edge.

He leans over you, warm breath against your lips, thumb working your clit harder. “Cum for me darlin, soak my fingers. Take what you want.”

And your body obeys, the band snapping in your stomach making you cry his name. He keeps his steady pace, marveling at the pink straining your checks and chest, the clench of your cunt around his fingers, and the way you say his name like a prayer. Joel is completely wrapped.

“Good girl, that’s right baby.” He whispers, coaxing you through your orgasm only relenting when you whimper wiggling your hips to try and get away. He brings his fingers to his lips, sucking your release from his skin with a groan. “You taste so much better than I ever imagined.”

You’re only able to whine a soft response, languid and docile below him. It’s only when you hear his zipper do you open your eyes. “There she is.” He’s kicking off his pants and boxers, your eyes drop to his cock stiff and angry red, your mouth flooding with spit, lifting your head to take in the view before you. He’s big, big and thick with a bed of black hair at the base, a bead of precum already leaking out of his tip and you’re stomach tightens in delight.

“You’re handsome.” Your voice is hoarse laced with ecstasy and foreign to your own ears.

His eyes widen slightly before he smiles, tan skin blushing. You reach for him then, hands slipping behind his neck and dragging him down into a deep kiss, stealing his breath and groaning at the taste of him and yourself mixed together.

Joel’s arm slips under your shoulders, his bandages hand cradling the back your head as his hips rut into your own. You gasp against his lips, the tip of his cock nudging your sensitive clit, your warm release coating him making him groan. “D’ya… do I need to grab somethin’?” He mutters, pressing his forehead to yours.

“I-if you wanna, I’m … I’m on the pill though and I’m clean.”

“Fucking Christ.”

Joel angles his hips, the head of his cock slipping to your entrance and nudging forward. You lift your legs, wrapping them around his hips, nails digging into his shoulders as he pushes forward, sinking into you with one slow thrust that has you breathless and reeling at the feeling of being so stretched, so fucking full.

“O-oh God Joel.” You breath, clinging to him. Joel groans, pulling out slowly before thrusting back in, the friction and pull overwhelming and yet not enough. “Please… Please Joel.” You’re begging, you want to wake up tomorrow and know exactly who made you feel so good with each step and wince.

Joel just groans, picking up on the rut of your hips and presses down closer, his weight welcoming and restricting all at one. “Hold on to me.” With that he sets a deep, hard rhythm, the head of his cock bruising your cervix with the snap of his hips against your thighs. Your bed creaking with the force he uses to drive himself into you with, your name spilling from his lips.

“Fuck… So good baby, feel so good around my cock.” Joel moans, burying his face in the junction of your neck. He bites at your shoulder, marking the skin making you whine into the air, your breath being punched from your lungs. You can already feel your next orgasm building up inside you, muscles clamping down on his cock making him groan and stutter in his pace.

“So-so good, d-don’t want you to stop.” You’ve been broken down to a pleading mess, your slick coating not only his cock but dripping down onto his balls, and pooling on to the sheets below you. Your nails are biting his skin, leaving crescent idents on his neck and shoulders that he will proudly wear when they bruise over. “M… I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum!”

“I’ve got you, I’ve got you pretty girl.” He grunts into your ear, his hands moving down between your bodies to find your clit, pressing tight circles into the bundle of nerves that has you withering below him, heels digging into his ass. Your lips are in that perfect O shape, eyebrows pinched and breathy moans filling your room. Joel sits back, slipping his arm to your lower back and holding you tight as he pounds into you, your hands gripping his arms for any form of leverage.

You scream his name, the sound bouncing off the walls as your orgasm rips through you, seizing ahold of your muscles and washing over your brain making you go blank and stiff in Joel’s hold. your pussy squeezing and milking his cock just right pulling his own orgasm from him with a low growl. He stills, hips twitching as he spills inside you, milky release filling you, warming you and spilling around his cock mixing with your own release.

“Fuck… shit…” Joel’s panting, eyes closed and head tilted back. “Oh baby… you’re gonna fuckin kill me.”

You pant out a small giggle, coming down from your high, thighs still twitching lightly as your brain slowly comes back to you. Joel pulls out gently, a small his through his teeth as he falls onto the bed beside you trying to catch his breath. Cracking open your eyes you stair at your ceiling for a moment, you reach across your sheets, fingers brushing against his.

Joel laces his fingers through yours, bringing the back of your hand to his lips, kissing gently. “That… that was…”

“Amazing.” You chuckle, curling into his side content and tired, body relaxing into his as sleep clouds your mind. Joel hums in agreement, the steadiness of your breathing lulling him to into his own dreamless sleep.

The end

[b1ackoutartist]

Wrapped

The soft lullaby hummed through the small apartment, a gentle tune breaking the silence of the night. Natasha Romanoff, once a feared and respected CEO, was now frequently found dozing off on the nursery floor, fingers entwined with those of her baby son, Alex.

The dining room was exquisitely decorated. Soft chandeliers, glinting silverware, and crisp tablecloths laid the foundation for a perfect family dinner. But there was an unmistakable tension in the air, more palpable than the rich aroma of food that wafted through the room.

Y/N gently cradled baby Alex, who cooed and drooled, blissfully unaware of the strained dynamics around the table. On one side was Melina, her icy gaze focused primarily on Y/N, occasionally darting to the baby. Opposite her sat Alexei, a silent observer, while Yelena played peek-a-boo with baby Alex, trying to lighten the mood.

Y/N attempted small talk. "Melina, this roast looks delicious."

Ignoring the compliment, Melina quipped, "Isn't it a bit too early for Alex to be teething, dear?"

Y/N's face flushed. "Every baby is different. The pediatrician said it's normal."

"It's just that when Natasha was a baby," Melina began, her voice dripping with passive aggression, "she followed every milestone to the letter. And Yelena, too."

Yelena rolled her eyes, shooting Y/N a sympathetic look. "Mama, can we not do this tonight?"

But Melina continued, "Natasha has a lot on her plate as a CEO, and I don’t think she needs more stress. Perhaps if you focused more on understanding the baby and less on whatever you've been doing..."

Y/N’s grip tightened around Alex. "I'm doing my best, Melina."

Natasha clenched her fist. "Mother, enough!"

Alexei tried to lighten the atmosphere, sharing an old anecdote from Natasha’s childhood. But Melina’s criticisms, veiled under the guise of 'advice', continued. They stung Y/N, the insecurities she tried so hard to bury resurfacing with each jab.

Y/N tried to focus on Alex, feeding and playing with him, but her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.

Yelena slid closer to Y/N. "Ignore her," she whispered. "You're doing great. And Nat thinks so too."

Just then, Alex wailed, startling everyone. Y/N tried to soothe him, but Melina's sharp voice cut through, "Do you even know how to hold him right?"

That was the last straw for Natasha. Standing up, she addressed her mother coldly, "Can I talk to you? Outside."

The room was silent as the two women left. Alexei sighed heavily, turning his attention to his food, while Yelena tried to comfort the shaken Y/N.

Outside, Natasha and Melina stood facing each other, the night air charged with tension.

"I won’t let you belittle Y/N any longer," Natasha started, her voice stern and unwavering.

"She's not right for you," Melina retorted, "She's keeping you from your responsibilities. She doesn’t even know how to raise Alex properly."

"You don't get to decide that. She’s an amazing mother, and I love her," Natasha countered, "If you can't respect that, then you won’t see Alex or me again."

Melina's eyes widened in disbelief. "You'd choose her over your own family?"

"I am choosing my family. Y/N and Alex are my family. And if you can’t accept that, then you’re pushing us away, not the other way around."

The weight of Natasha’s words hung heavy in the air. Melina looked away, struggling to find words.

The weight of Natasha’s words hung heavy in the air. Melina looked away, struggling to find words. The two women stood in silence, the cool night breeze whipping around them, carrying with it an air of finality.

After a few minutes, Natasha turned on her heels and walked back inside. The atmosphere in the dining room was thick, and everyone turned their attention to her as she entered. Without saying a word, she took baby Alex from Y/N's arms. "Get your things," she instructed gently but firmly, "We're leaving."

Y/N nodded, her eyes misting over with tears, yet she felt a strange sense of relief. She stood up, her movement drawing Yelena's attention. The younger woman approached her, whispering, "I'll come by tomorrow, okay? Just take care of yourself and Alex."

As Y/N moved to gather their things, Alexei tried to mediate. He stood, approaching his red-headed daughter. "Natasha, stay. Let's talk this out."

Natasha looked at him, her green eyes icy and resolute. "I appreciate it, but there’s nothing more to say. I won't let anyone disrespect my family."

The old bear of a man looked saddened. "Just remember this is your home. Always."

Natasha offered him a weak smile, appreciating his sentiment but knowing that tonight, leaving was the right choice. She adjusted baby Alex in her arms, feeling his little heartbeat against her. The weight of her son was grounding, a constant reminder of what mattered most.

With Y/N by her side, and their belongings in hand, they made their way to the door. The house that was once filled with laughter and joy seemed cold and unwelcoming. But as the door closed behind them, they knew they were stepping into a new chapter, one where they could create a loving environment for Alex and themselves.

Yelena and Alexei watched them go, a mix of sadness and understanding in their eyes. Melina, still outside, heard the car start and drive off. She leaned against the wall, a wave of regret washing over her. The realization that she might have lost her daughter and grandson because of her stubbornness weighed heavy on her heart.

[baronessblixen]

Fictober Day 23: Blizzard of Emotions

Prompt: "We can fix this, I know we can"

Based on this ask by @randomfoggytiger: Mulder and Scully are forced to check into a motel during a snowstorm. Memories, tension, and misunderstandings await. Rating: R, wc: 1,427.

Tagging @today-in-fic @xffictober24

What causes them to get trapped in freezing cold temperatures for the second time in less than a year? The snow surprised everyone. A once in a lifetime blizzard. Unforeseen circumstances. By now, Scully has heard it all. She's hugging herself so tightly that her hands nearly touch behind her back.

In truth, the motel they found while fleeing from the snowstorm is cozy and warm. There’s a fire roaring at the other end of the lobby, but Scully can’t get warm.

Her body remembers the snow; the endless white cold. She glances at Mulder, wondering if he has similar thoughts. She could ask him, but then she’d have to talk to him, and right now, they aren’t talking.

How that happened, she isn’t sure. All she knows is that it has to do with the only other refugee from the weather who also didn’t get a room in the motel.

Benjamin.

He's a bit older than them, with a distinguished look—like an older cousin of AD Skinner, but with hair. Lots of it. Chestnut brown, and when he walked in, he shook his head like a dog, making Scully smile. He’d smiled back and introduced himself.

He was on his way back from a conference about cardiovascular health. That was the first time Mulder raised his eyebrow. During the whole conversation, he’d been quiet. He sat there, watching the other man, but keeping his thoughts to himself. A very un-Mulder-like move.

Scully, however, reveled in the conversation. Dr. Benjamin Cartwright was a delight. They talked as if they’d known each other for five years and not five minutes.

She asked him if he needed to make any calls home, let his wife know that he was detained. The second Benjamin said that he wasn’t married and that no one was waiting for him, Mulder had cleared his throat.

“Are you all right?” Scully asked him, worry seeping into her voice.

A snippy ‘fine’ had followed and then he’d started pacing like a caged lion. Scully had tried to ignore him. Had tried not to watch as he played peek-a-boo with a small child that was clinging to their exhausted mother. It wasn’t Benjamin’s fault. None of it.

“Mulder, can you please sit down? You’re making me dizzy.” She’d cut into Benjamin’s tale of his latest surgery and both men fell quiet. Mulder glared at her, standing frozen in place. Benjamin, who didn’t know her as well, swallowed hard.

“Fine.” This time through gritted teeth. He did sit down, his back to her and Benjamin, his eyes facing the wall. She briefly closed her eyes and sighed.

“I’m sorry, Benjamin,” a huff from Mulder followed, “please continue.”

And that’s what he did – what he’s still doing. Scully listens to him and has one eye on the snow falling outside the window. The cold crawls into her bones and she shivers. Benjamin is undeterred; he doesn’t know her long enough to notice that anything is wrong. Scully bites her lip, convinced it’s raw and chafed.

After Antarctica, her nightmares had been a flurry of white. Not once did she dream about being kidnapped, or being stuck in a block of ice. It was always the snow. Trying to run in it and her feet barely moving. In her nightmares, she cried out for Mulder, unable to reach him. The snow always swallowed him before she could grasp his hand.

“I’ve been talking so much about me,” Benjamin says, a soft drawl in his voice. “Why don’t you tell me about yourself and your work, Dana?”

“Dana,” Mulder – still staring at the naked, white wall – mumbles.

“Well,” she starts, drawing the word out while looking at Mulder. He, too, turns to her, but for once, she can’t read his expression. Long seconds follow. He gets up and she feels as if she’s just failed a test she’s studied hard for. She watches him leave the lobby, wondering where he’s going.

“Our job,” she tries again, her heart not in it. Her mind is on Mulder, needing to know what’s bothering him. “Would you please excuse me for a moment?” she says, not waiting for a reply before heading in the direction Mulder disappeared.

The motel is bigger than she imagined. She was right behind Mulder and now he’s disappeared. He wouldn’t be crazy enough to step out into the blizzard, would he? She shivers again. As a child, she used to love snow. Now, the mere thought of it makes her sick.

Scully is about to give up her Mulder search and return to the lobby. Her teeth are chattering and she wishes she had warmer clothes on her. She hears a sound that makes her stop. There’s a clang and muttering that sounds suspiciously like Mulder.

“Mulder?” she asks, rounding a corner. There he is. He’s banging his fist against an old, rusty vending machine. “What are you doing?”

“Where’s your new friend?” he replies in place of an answer.

“Presumably where I left him.” She crosses her arms in front of her chest. “You were rude.”

“Well, I don’t like him.”

“Mulder, you don’t even know him.”

“Neither do you. I know the type and that’s enough.”

“Are you-,” but she trails off and finishes her sentence with a laugh. Mulder turns around to her.

“Am I what?”

“Jealous,” she says.

“Of a guy with several doctorates and perfect hair? Why would I be? Scully, am I cursed? The vending machine ate my money. It’s like when we- well, it happened before. Only then it was… there’s no bomb here, I checked. Still, that thing ate my money.”

“What did you want?” she asks gently. He’s quit for a long time, staring at the measly variety behind the glass.

“Wasn’t even for me,” he mumbles.

“What?”

He presses his finger against the glass.

“A cup of ramen?” He nods.

“I saw you shiver and I thought… I was looking for the kitchen and wanted to ask them for hot chocolate and somehow I got stuck here.” Warmth spreads through her and for the first time in a while, she doesn’t feel cold at all.

“I thought I’d at least get you hot ramen. Just something to warm you up.” He’s avoiding her eyes, but she wants to look him in the eyes, so she touches his chin.

“Thank you, Mulder.”

“It’s the snow, isn’t it? It makes you think about it. I feel the same.” They haven’t talked about Antarctica. Mulder has made the odd joke here and there, but other than that, they’ve tiptoed around it. She could have died.

They almost died together, right there in the snow. To this day, her memory is hazy on how they even made it out of there. Then there’s everything that happened before the snow. The hallway. The bee. The almost kiss.

Mulder bangs his fist against the vending machine one more time. Something inside shifts and they both listen to the telltale sound of something making its way through the workings of the machine. It lands with a soft thud and they exchange a look.

“That did not sound like a cup of ramen,” Mulder says and reaches into the opening. “It’s-”

“A Snickers,” Scully says with a chuckle.

“Maybe we can melt it over the fire and turn it into hot chocolate.”

“That’s the most disgusting thing I can imagine.” But at least Mulder is grinning at her.

“So, um, what if I did feel the way you thought I felt about Dr. Benjamin?” he asks, unwrapping the candy bar. He breaks it into two pieces and hands Scully the bigger one.

“I’d say it’s cute and that you have nothing to worry about because while I thought he was nice enough, I’m here with you sharing a Snickers.”

“I’m going to get you something hot, Scully. I promise.” She laughs softly.

“I remember what you said about the best way to regenerate body heat.” He stares at her open-mouthed, a piece of chocolate falling onto his sweater. “Too bad we don’t have sleeping bags.”

“We can fix this,” Mulder says quickly, “I know we can.”

“Maybe next time.” She can’t believe she’s winking at him, but his expression is worth it.

“You want the ramen, don’t you? To warm you up.”

“Or any kind of soup.”

“Come on,” he says, taking her hand into his. “There’s got to be a kitchen here somewhere. We’ll just flash our badges and get you some soup.” Their hands find each other and interlock as they walk together.