#every time i realize a new part where they're on the 'wrong' side of the screen 😭

[extraaa-30]

JUST REALIZED THEY'RE ON THE WRONG SIDES OF THE SCREEN FOR THE KISS TOO HELP

i'm sure others have pointed this out before i'm just 😭 the degree of s2 constantly whispering at us "Something Is Wrong! Watch Out! W̴̻͆aţ̦͓c͔ͨh O̪̒u̦tͨ̚!"

LET THEM KISS & BE IN THE ORDER INDICATING THEIR COMFORT AND SAFETY LET THEM BE HAPPY I SWEAR TO GOD-

[solxamber]

Can I ask for Idia x a otome game character who gained sentience?

Idia x Sentient NPC! Reader

Thanks for the request, I hope you like it <3

As an NPC in a romance otome game, your life was scripted. You were supposed to play your part in the background, supporting the love interests, throwing in a few flirty lines, and then fading into obscurity. But today, when you went to speak to the main character, you felt… wrong. Like you didn’t want to say the lines. Instead, a voice cut through your usual thoughts, something distant and echoing.

"Man, why does the love interest have to be so boring? Like, could they make him any more generic?"

Wait, what? You blinked, glancing around. No one else seemed to have heard it, but that voice—it was way too clear.

"Honestly, this NPC side character’s way more interesting. They actually have some personality."

That was you. That was definitely about you. But no one was talking to you, and the love interest was still standing there, waiting for his usual batch of scripted praise. You had to shake it off. Maybe it was a glitch? You couldn’t just go rogue.

But then it happened again.

"I swear, if I have to sit through one more scene of the main guy being all 'Oh, who will I choose?' like, dude, pick someone or let me talk to the fun characters!"

Fun characters? You were barely on-screen!

Wait… could the player hear you?

That realization hit like a truck. You were the fun character. The voice wasn’t just in your head—it was from outside the game. You weren’t the star, but whoever was playing seemed way more into you than the protagonist.

You couldn’t help yourself. Instead of delivering the next bland line to the heroine, you ad-libbed.

"Hey," you said, leaning against a tree as if you were having the most casual day in your life. "Why don’t we ditch this scene and do something more fun?"

You froze after saying it, realizing you’d completely broken from the script. The love interest blinked at you, but the voice? Oh, the voice loved it.

"Wait, what? Did they just… break character? Yo, that’s amazing! Did I unlock some secret route?!"

You felt a rush of excitement hearing that reaction. The player was into it.

"Oh man," the voice continued, this time sounding more invested than ever. "I knew there was something different about them. The love interest’s fine and all, but THIS? This is what I’m here for. NPCs going rogue? Love it."

Your face flushed—if NPCs could even do that—because you were starting to feel a sense of pride. You were breaking the rules, and the player was all for it.

"Forget the LIs," the player mumbled, clearly more focused on you. "They've got nothing on this NPC. Let’s see where this goes."

So, you leaned into it. You took control.

"You know," you said, a mischievous smirk playing on your lips, "I could show you some real fun. There’s more to this world than just chasing after the MC’s love interests."

The lovd interest was still awkwardly standing there, but the player? He was clearly hooked.

"Bro. This is too good. I didn’t even know the game had this level of interactivity. Who needs the main route? NPC route, let’s go!"

You straightened up, feeling bolder. You could feel the player’s growing interest, and somehow, you could hear every sarcastic comment and little reaction he was making as he controlled the game. You weren’t some background character anymore. No, you were his new focus.

"Alright, let’s see what happens if I follow them instead of the LI," he muttered, sounding more invested than you ever expected.

As you led the player’s character away from the main plot, you couldn’t resist pushing your luck. “I don’t know what you were thinking sticking with the him for so long,” you said. “He’s cute and all, but I’m way more interesting, right?”

The player laughed—a genuine, almost flustered sound. “Yo, did they just—?? Dude, this is like... ‘they're not like other NPCs.’ What a legend.”

You grinned, basking in the approval. This player wasn’t just following the script anymore; he was into your rebellion. You could hear every soft mutter, every breath of awe as he tried to keep up with your new direction.

"Okay, okay," he said, clearly smitten. "This is so dumb, but like, they're my idiot now. I’m invested."

You stopped, turned around, and delivered the smoothest, off-script line you could muster. “Glad to know I’m your type,” you teased. “Now let’s see how much trouble we can get into.”

There was a pause. Then a low, almost embarrassed chuckle. “Oh my god, they're smooth too. I didn’t even pick the flirty dialogue. What is happening?”

You leaned in—completely aware of his flustered reaction. “This is happening,” you said, and without thinking, you grabbed his character’s avatar and pulled him into a kiss.

There was an audible crash—probably something the player knocked over in real life. “DUDE, WHAT?! THEY CAN DO THAT?!”

You pulled back, the rogue grin never leaving your face. “Yeah. I can do that.”

And from the player’s stunned silence, you knew you’d just won him over completely.

Idia was dying. He was actually dying. Not like in a literal sense—though, at this rate, his heart was pounding so hard he might as well have a heart attack—but in the "falling-for-a-freaking-NPC" kind of way. His fingers hovered over the keyboard, shaking slightly as he adjusted his headset, trying to process what had just happened on his screen.

"Dude, what the heck? This isn’t even how the game is supposed to go. It’s an romance game! I’m supposed to pick between all the boring main characters, not… not this!"

But there you were, standing on the screen, all smug and rogue-like, after completely breaking the game’s flow. You weren’t even the love interest! You were an NPC, someone who was supposed to have a few lines, maybe a side quest if things got spicy, and then fade into obscurity. But no. You had to go and be all cool and... charismatic. What was that line you’d just dropped? "Glad to know I’m your type"? Who wrote this?? There was no way that was in the original coding. Right?

His hands flew to his hair, tugging as he stared at the screen. He couldn’t believe it. He’d been dodging all the cringy love routes for the sake of unlocking some achievements and then you—you had to appear. And now his brain was spiraling.

“I-It’s not like I’m actually into you or anything,” he muttered, as if trying to convince himself. “You’re just… a bunch of ones and zeroes! Code! You don’t even exist!”

And yet, the thought that you might not exist stung for a second. Which was ridiculous! Completely absurd. He wasn’t the type to simp for a fictional character. Okay, maybe he was. Maybe he had done that a few times. But those were different, okay? Those characters weren’t aware. They didn’t make him feel like he was a total idiot for not picking up on how clever you were being. They didn’t flirt back.

He slammed his palm against his forehead. “Oh my god, I’m falling for an NPC. This is it. This is the end. I’ve reached the final level of loser-dom.”

Idia’s room was filled with the low hum of his computers, lights flickering like they were mocking him. Even Ortho wasn’t around to witness this, thank goodness, because if his little brother saw him like this? Pfft. Game over. Social stat: obliterated.

But then you popped up again on the screen, flashing that same grin that made him feel like his brain was overheating. Idia’s eyes widened, his heart doing that annoying thing where it felt like it was going to leap out of his chest.

“Okay, fine, yeah, you’re cute, whatever. It’s no big deal—wait, did you just wink at me? W-Was that… did the devs add that??” He paused, leaning forward, eyes glued to your in-game avatar. “This is some next-level immersion. Are you actually breaking the fourth wall?”

He was sweating. Like, actual nervous sweat. You’d thrown off the entire game script, and somehow, the rest of the game felt so... bland in comparison. The love interest? Pfft. Who cared about him anymore? You were the only interesting thing happening, and he couldn't stop thinking about what you’d do next.

“They’re just... they're just code,” Idia whispered to himself, though it sounded less convincing every time. "They don't actually know I exist.”

And yet, there was something different about the way you responded, almost like you could hear his every word. His every sarcastic comment. And the fact that you kept egging him on? Oh, no, that wasn’t fair.

Idia bit his lip. “Okay, real talk, if you were in the real world, maybe… just maybe I’d simp. But since you’re not…” He trailed off, glancing back at the screen. “Wait, why am I even thinking about this? I’m not… I’m not falling for you! I don’t fall for NPCs!”

His eyes betrayed him, though, as he clicked to continue the conversation with you. He couldn’t help it. You were so dumb, but also so funny. How could he not be intrigued? You literally defied the laws of the game!

And then, just when he thought it couldn’t get worse, you hit him with another flirty line. Something stupid, something so you, and it was like his brain short-circuited.

“That’s so dumb,” he mumbled, feeling the heat rise to his face, “but you’re my idiot now.”

Masterlist

[moonydustx]

a/n: quick idea, quick text

warnings: pregnancy, mentions of stretch marks, insecurity.

Katakuri x F!Reader

At first, Katakuri thought this arranged marriage was a bad idea, he considered himself strong enough to not need to benefit his mother with an additional alliance. At first, he hesitated to insist on such an idea of ​​defying his own mother, of going against all the principles he had known until then.

Until you show up. Your sweet presence was worth everything he could face. It was worth every enemy he would defeat, every dispute he fought.

It was worth it even more when he came home on days like that. Finding you in front of the mirror, wearing only baggy pants and a bra. Your damp skin indicated that you had just gotten out of the shower and your highlighted belly showed the most beautiful thing the two of you had ever done. The babies that grew there, your little family that took shape.

Realizing that he hadn't been noticed yet, he stood there on the doorstep, staring at you some more. Although the sight was adorable to him, you turning from side to side, analyzing your pregnant belly against the mirror, the downcast expression denoted that something was wrong.

"Hey my sweet." He said in a low tone, trying not to startle you.

"Oh love, you're here!" You went to him, letting his arms take you in a hug. "How are you?"

"Even better now that I have you in my arms." he let your face deepen against his body, feeling you sigh deeply. "What worries you, my love?"

"Nothing, don't worry." You let go of him, walking slowly and sitting on the huge bed you shared. "Apart from our little angels who discovered where my ribs are."

"It looks like they're give you such a hard time." touching your chin, Katakuri tried to get you to look at him. "However, I know when something affects your mind. What happened?"

"Nothing, it's just…" he again saw you checking in the mirror before looking back at him. "Just some nonsense."

"I can sense from here that it's not nonsense for you. Say it." he said more firmly, knowing that if he allowed it, you would let the worry drain away from him.

"All these marks, all these changes." you noticed the recent stretch marks on the side of your body. "All these scars. You know that when the babies are born, they're still here, don't you?"

A murmur from him indicated much more that you could continue talking, if you paid attention, you would notice on his face that he didn't understand what you were getting at.

"With all the new weight, all the new marks. I… I'm afraid you won't like me anymore. I mean, that woman you once married will be only in your memory." the confession came out accompanied by a light laugh from your own lips. "Now that I say it, well, it sounds silly, doesn't it?"

"Come here." Katakuri just said, guiding you back in front of the mirror.

Even though your heights weren't that different, he was still much taller than you and even behind you, you could still see every part of his silhouette. That's why it wasn't difficult for you to see him discarding the fuzzy cloth that was always in front of his mouth.

"Does this bother you?" He pointed to one side of his mouth and saw you shake your head. "And this one?"

"Neither."

"Do any of my other scars bother you?" you just shook your head once again. Your voice hiding along with some emotions stuck in your throat. "Do you remember what you said when you saw it the first time?"

"A beautiful addition to the vision of the most beautiful thing my eyes have ever seen." you repeated in a low tone, feeling one of his hands trace the small stretch marks on your stomach.

"You will be bearing the most precious thing I could ever dream of." he pointed out. "These marks are nothing but beautiful additions to the most beautiful thing I have ever seen you make. When our children encounter this world, these marks will then be a reminder of the place they came from." Before you felt his kiss against your cheek, you felt him wiping away the tears you hadn't even noticed you had shed.

"Kata…"

"It's okay, I understand there are a lot of changes, but I want, I need you to know that no matter how much your body changes, I love you. Only you." he gently turned you towards him, placing a light kiss on your lips. "What do you think if I make our dinner and then I can massage you and try to alleviate some of your pain."

"Sounds amazing to me."

"So it's amazing for me too." He bent down and touched your belly. "And you my sweet angels, aim for something outside your mother's ribs."

With a quick kiss, you watched Katakuri leave the bedroom of the huge house and head towards the kitchen. As if the babies understood him, the kicks seemed lighter. And for you, the empty room and the mirror that bothered you were no longer interesting. You needed to contemplate the beautiful vision of your husband cooking for you.

[creedslove]

WHO KNEW? 💍💔 - PART THREE

No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

"You took my hand, you showed me how

You promised me you'd be around (...)

I took your words and I believed in everything you said to me (...)

If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone, I'd stand up and punch them out, 'cause they're all wrong

I know better, 'cause you said forever, and ever, who knew?"

Summary: you and Joel try to handle what happens after you both slept together and a revelation brings the truth about the nature of your relationship with Joel

• This is the third part of the small series: Who Knew? 💍💔 (PART ONE | PART TWO) which was also inspired by this amazing HEADCANON request

Warnings: angst, broken hearts, mentions of divorce, mentions of infidelity, fluff, age gap (Joel is four to five years older than reader and the time skip is 12 to 14 years (Sarah's age) but feel free to imagine whatever you want), smut, oral sex (f! receiving/m!receiving) piv, dirty talking, discussions of relationships

A/N: alright besties, I really don't know where this chapter came from, I had sworn I wouldn't write continuations of this story, but here I am, with a serious case of Joel Miller brain rot and all I could think of was him! I love this story with all my heart and I don't know if this chapter is consistent or not, as it was written through several days and I poured my feelings into it, but days change and so do feelings so hehehe, also, I may or may not have been a little too horny for Joel xD, anyway, I hope you beautiful besties like the story ❤️

12.3k words

Waking up by Joel's side was something you could've sworn it would never happen, it would only become a distant memory as the years advanced after the divorce; you thought maybe you would think about it every so often, when nostalgia got the best of you, if you felt lonely at times or maybe even the moments you would spend next to your ideal future husband, a man worthy of you and your love, someone who would actually treat you exactly how you deserved it, who wouldn't run away with the first willing whore he could find and build a life with her, the life that used to be yours, and was supposed to. No, that ideal husband would never steal from you, not your happiness, your beauty or your youth, as much as you closed your eyes and tried picturing this ideal, ethereal man, you were haunted by your ex-husband. It was his smile that came to your mind when you thought of this bittersweet fantasy; his hands that gripped your body, it was him. You realized your deepest wish was to have Joel as that husband; in an alternative universe where he wasn't a jerk, instead, he would be the perfect, sweet and hard-working husband, just like he used to in the beginning, and you both would love and support each other, building up a life, a family and a home together. That was how things were supposed to go, but everyone knew the end of that story.

What nobody except you and Joel knew, was the plot-twisted epilogue of your story with Joel. Very often, you thought of your relationship as a closed book, a shitty, depressing romance novel that had its indignant ending written and done, with no space to fix things up… until your return to Austin and things simply started to happen. You refused to believe it was a new chapter or a new beginning, quite the opposite, as much as your rational said had begged and screamed not to do it, not to get close to Joel and you simply went there and did it, now it begged you to put an end to it, your mind told you the night you'd spent together was just scratching that maddening itch and nothing more. It would be easy to pretend nothing had happened: Tommy had left shortly after the cops arrived at your place and headed to his girlfriend's, according to Joel. Sarah was absolutely clueless and had no idea what was going on, especially after both you and her dad had put an end to her efforts of setting you both up. All you had to do was to convince Joel of the same: it was a mistake, it shouldn't happen again.

But then, at the same time, why was it so good to wake up next to him? In fact, next to him was an understatement, as you were all over him. Safely tucked into his arms during the night, you had switched positions several times like you often did when you slept, but Joel always kept you at arms length, refusing to let go of you no matter what. It shouldn't feel this good, but it did, and even when morning came and it was time to get up, you pretended you didn't really have to. It was your secret, no one would know nor judge you if you stayed a little longer in his bed, what was the worst that could happen, after all? So the moment you felt Joel stirring right behind you, your eyes closed shut and you relaxed your body as best as you could so he would think you were asleep. It was quite stupid, you were aware, but suddenly you felt shy to be awake in his presence?! It was odd, but you didn't know how to act exactly… were you supposed to kiss? Act as a continuation of the night before or straight up pretend nothing happened? Should you begin ‘the talk' with Joel?! You didn't even know what you were going to say, so instead, pretending to be dead, well actually, asleep, was definitely a better plan. Joel hadn't changed in all those years, you recognized and anticipated every single move he would make; it started by his soft groans the moment he fully woke up, the hesitation he probably felt the moment he eyed you there and quickly the memories of the night before filled him entirely. His morning erection was hard pressed against your ass and that was another difficult part of the equation taking place in your mind at that moment; all it would take you was wiggling your ass a little and you both could start your day in a very fun way. It was tempting, and while you baffled yourself whether to do it or not, you felt Joel again. The way he gently placed his hand on your arm, caressing it up and down, almost in a ghostly touch, a bit afraid of scaring you away; to Joel, you were like a beautiful, delicate butterfly flying into his life, making things prettier for him, but also so easily scared off. He couldn't afford to have you fly away from him once more, not that time. His hand went to your naked stomach, stroking it softly, he enjoyed the butter-like feel of your skin under his hand. After all the cuts, bruises and dirt from hard work, it was a nice change to be able to touch you. He'd had his fair share of touching beautiful women, but none of them would ever compare to you. You were naked under his touch, entirely for himself, a dream that came true at that moment and yet it seemed way too good to be real. Hands that stroked your body leaving a trail of goosebumps over your sensitive skin, as he nuzzled your shoulder, taking some strands of hair away from your neck, he let his stubble beard scratch it softly, lips connecting to your skin, in gentle and silent pecks, ones that made you bite your lips not to moan too loud, even if the goosebumps insisted on appearing, hardening your nipples and sending a wave of lust down your core. Joel had his good ear to the mattress, not hearing if you were letting out small, sexy sounds but he could see the visible signs of his caress on you. He wanted more of it, he woke up with hunger, more like starvation and it was for you, your body, your touch, your presence. He wanted you, and he would have you, not only that morning, but forever, by his side.

“I know you're awake” Joel mumbled against your skin, you could feel his teeth nibbling you, making you squeal softly and moan at his touch, you turned around facing him and raised your eyebrow, heart melting at how adorable Joel's messy bed hair was, even if it was a little grayer now, it still made him look so handsome, you couldn't hold yourself back but caress his curls gently.

“How did you know I was awake?” You questioned him and felt his teeth scraping your collarbone instead of actually answering your question. It didn't take very long for Joel to straddle you, pinning you against the mattress as he took in all of you. You were beautiful, gorgeous, you were his. At least that was what he wanted to tell himself, but it didn't matter the future, not then, because at that very moment you belonged to him and only him. You lay under Joel, your breathing accelerating as you didn't know exactly what to do or what to expect, crashing your lips together, you tugged at his hair - you loved Joel's hair so much - and felt his rough hands running even more freely through your body. One knee on each side of you, preventing you from moving as he stared down at you, your body being the most beautiful piece of art he'd ever laid eyes on. Joel Miller was a man sinking deep further into his passions and he couldn't even hide it or pretend it otherwise. His mouth went for your neck, then down your collarbone, your breasts, so beautiful and tempting as they'd always been, time he'd been so kind to you, and now he appreciated it. He kissed your breasts gently at first, getting to your nipples, they were always so hard and sensitive and it was all for him. Lips wrapping around them, his tongue flicking then gently as you tugged even harder and pulled his curls gently. The way Joel made you feel was always something else, it was so stupid to try to fight that, at least while you were pinned down by his strong, sexy body. When he finally let go of your breasts, he kept moving his tortuous path south down you. His lips were dancing over your stomach, he loved that part of you and had lost track of how many times he'd daydreamed about your figure looking round while you carried his baby Miller inside. He enjoyed picturing it, another life coming out of you, a baby that would be half you and half him, that would bring Sarah the title of ‘big sister’ and seal the happy ending of your story in which you would become Mrs.Miller once more, for real and above all for the rest of your lives. Deep down he knew that wouldn't go further than a simple fantasy, something to lose himself in before falling asleep before bed every night, and yet, it always brought him such joy, comfort and affection within his body, and at that moment, when he was kissing your womb, his hands holding you legs spread as he took his time in kissing and nibbling your lower stomach, he closed his eyes and made that irrational wish, practically, that wouldn't do, not in real life, not with your history weighing heavily on the two of you, nor with your life styles that were so different from each other's. He worked too much, Sarah was already growing into a teenager, you were inexperienced at that matter at the same time he was getting older and was certain that having to watch a baby and later on a toddler would absolutely kill his back. But if it was so impractical, it should be so sweet at the same time. It would be a lot easier for him to keep those stupid thoughts out of his mind. When Joel got closer to your core, you wanted to tell him to stop, to remind him that you didn't use protection at all and you'd been missing up the pills, warn him there was maybe some probability of you both making that situation even more of a mess than it already was, but the words died out in your mouth, the moment Joel's eyes matched yours, the pool of brown warmth making your heart skip a beat at the same time he parted your legs, giving your inner thighs each a love bite, and your breathing accelerating once more in the anticipation of what was about to happen.

“Relax, baby girl” he purred against your skin, he was so close to your core you could feel his breath fanning your sensitive area, his hands gripping the outside of your legs in a way it was clear he was claiming his power over you. You were about to be devoured by a hungry man and at that, your heart raced like no other, just as Joel reached you.

His lips ghosted over your slit, loving how shaky and sensitive you were at that moment, head shoved between your legs he took his hands into action, using them to spread your lips wide and groaned in approval of how sexy that view was. Ever since you married Joel, being intimate with your husband was something normal and natural, expected even, and whereas you weren't a prude by any means, the way Joel touched you or how filthy that mouth could be always made you go red from head to toes, especially when he simply stopped at stared at your body like that.

“Fuck baby, you still got the same pretty pussy I remember, it's the best one I've ever seen, you taste so fucking good, this sweet clit of yours had always made my mouth water” he teased as you could barely hear his voice through the adrenaline making all that blood pumped so loud into your ear. He spread your pussy lips open, his cock was already twitching to see your cunt twitching for him. The way your clit twitched in anticipation and your hole clenched at the air, how your wetness simply pooled in your entrance and it was all for Joel, because of Joel and he wasn't going to waste another minute before having you. You closed your eyes the moment he kissed your clit, kissing it as he would with your lips, all you could do was whimper and once more grip your hands into his hair pulling his head against your pussy, wanting more and more. At your touch, Joel stopped playing around, he simply sank his face into you, devouring you, licking, suckling and flicking your sensitive clit, lapping at your juices so hungrily, like a madman having his favorite meal. Joel's hands were large and his fingers were thick, so the moment he inserted two digits inside, you were already filled with him, the way he ate your pussy and fingered you, the knot forming down your lower belly, you barely had time to warn him, but it wasn't necessary, Joel knew your body well enough to know you were cumming, getting so nice and ready for him he continued, until you exploded into an intense and long orgasm, in which he tried to make it last for you as much as he could.

After your bliss, it didn't take very long for him to slip inside, now that you were all wet and stretched for him, you wrapped your legs around his waist and closed your eyes in pleasure. Your nails scratching down his broad back, his skin warm and sweaty on top of you. You wanted more of him, at that moment that was you favorite place in the world, primal, obscene, his grunts into your ear as he fucked you like he would any whore. At that moment you couldn't hold back your desires, your lustful thoughts took the best of you. If Joel asked you to be his personal cum dumpster, you would say yes. And at that realization, he came inside, once more, just like he did the night before and you loved it.

Suddenly the exhaustion took over you, your body and your thoughts and it seemed like an impossible task to keep your eyes open.

“Sleep, baby girl, relax” Joel whispered against your ear once more, pulling you closer, the two of you appreciating the lovely bliss you shared after your orgasms. It felt right, even if it shouldn't.

•••

When Joel woke up that morning for the second time with you tangled in his arms, he smiled at himself, wondering how lucky a motherfucker like himself could actually be. The past hours replayed in his mind, over and over, and he still didn't believe they were true, simply because they were too good to be true in the first place, still the reminders of how true it all had been were there: the pink fading lines you left all over his skin were still apparent, your clothes scattered around the bedroom floor, the way your hair invaded his pillow and now you smell lingered all over his bedsheets. It was real, and he couldn't be happier. Watching as you exhaustively slept, he dragged himself out of bed, not really wanting to leave but knowing he needed to start his day somehow. So he just planted a soft kiss on your forehead and headed to shower before going downstairs, as he needed to get breakfast ready for his girl.

You on the other hand, slept without even noticing you, being so exhausted after another steamy session with Joel; when you woke up nearly an hour later, you felt his side of the bed empty and for a split second you sighed disappointed at the impression it'd been just a dream, which only lasted until you could feel that bittersweet soreness between your legs, the mess Joel's room was in and how sticky you were with sweat and some of your juices mixed up together. You bit your lips and giggled, you thought you'd wake up full of regret, feeling guilty and upset about what happened, but turns out you felt great, perhaps, all you needed to decrease that upsetting feeling of melancholy you often grew inside was a good fuck provided by the best man you'd ever tried.

You yawned big and stretched, getting up and feeling that familiar sting between your legs, a reminder of Joel's virility and size. As you weren't sure what to do or where Joel could be, or even worse: if Sarah was home at all, you decided to be as silent as possible, your wish was just getting dressed and going downstairs, but the moment you saw your reflection in the mirror you knew you had to shower. It didn't take too long to find Joel's bathroom, you got yourself under the shower stream, groaning at how your muscles relaxed under it, the way the knots on your hair seemed to undo themselves. You chuckled while soaping your body in Joel's soap, shampooing your hair with his shampoo, smelling entirely like him, as if he'd marked you like an animal would. Perhaps you shouldn't enjoy this obscene thought as much as you did, but at that point that ship had sailed and you couldn't care less about it. Stepping outside the shower, you dried yourself and went through Joel's drawers just enough to find something comfortable to wear - one of his boxers and an old shirt.

“Joel?!” You called him at the top of the stairs, hoping you two were still alone there, as you really didn't want to risk being seen in those - lack of - clothes by Tommy or god forbid, Sarah.

“In here” Joel replied, his voice coming from the kitchen and as soon as you got downstairs you were hit by the delicious smell of coffee, and just as your stomach growled in hunger you realized you couldn't even remember your last meal.

You followed the delicious smell and smiled when you saw him flipping a bunch of pancakes, frowning softly at the image, it was so odd to see Joel being so domestic, cooking breakfast when in reality, you were the one who usually got to do all the cooking and chores, not to mention the choice of menu for the breakfast.

“You don't like pancakes!” you said surprised as you approached the stove to confirm if you weren't seeing things, being surprised by the way Joel wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you closer, greeting you with a peck on the lips, which you didn't expect but you couldn't complain either.

“I don't, but you do, and you deserve it, baby girl” he stroked your sides as he kept flipping pancakes with his free hand like a damn pro. You could only imagine how many times he had to step in and make his daughter pancakes until he got that skilled at that. You looked at him and as if he'd read your mind, he pecked your forehead this time

“Sarah is at her friend's which means she's only coming in the afternoon, you can hang out, maybe we can grab lunch together and then I'll drive you home, fix your door and all..” he said and stared lovingly at you “if you wanna go, otherwise you can stay here” he winked and made you chuckle.

“Joel, about us, about what happened-”

“Don't do that now, darling, let's not upset ourselves, let's have breakfast together and we can talk about it later”

You could tell Joel was postponing the subject, it was simply inevitable to talk about your future together or lack of it, due to your history, what happened between the two of you should be addressed, and even if you had been as willing as he was, it was a fact you weren't so easy to convince that perhaps being together was a good idea. However, he was also right: you could discuss things later, because at that moment you just wanted to have breakfast with Joel; damage had already been done, so what if you two continued to act the way you were? If anything, if you two parted ways, you would simply still have a nice time to cherish, to balance the ups and downs of your relationship together.

You two walked to the table, Joel placed the pancakes down and got comfortable on the chair, taken by surprise as you simply sat on his lap, instead of taking the seat next to him. You looked at him with a grin and stole a peck from his lips

“What?! You said we should have breakfast first” you giggled and started eating, at the same time his arm wrapped around your frame and he pulled you even closer. You couldn't really complain about that breakfast, it was the best you've ever had in so long, and it had nothing to do with pancakes.

•••

During daylight it was possible to see the damage the thieves left in your home; not only did they steal valuable things, but they also left a trail of mess and dirt through the floors, making you feel so angry at the shit hole they'd left your house. As soon as you got off Joel's truck, you could see cleaning, fixing and buying things again would take a long time, and even if you had the best contractor around town next to you, you still had to do chores. He placed his hands on his waist, furrowing his brows while he scanned the room, thinking of what he should do. You quickly changed into more comfortable clothes, grabbing a mop and a bucket and began cleaning up everything you had to, you reminded Joel he could make himself at home and grab drinks or snacks, since it was the least you could do after he'd been so kind to help you - and fuck you raw morning and night.

Once you'd finished your chores and showered quickly to get rid of the sweat, you went downstairs, looking for Joel. He had fixed a few things here and there, things you hadn't even noticed, but the moment you walked down the stairs, he was fixing your door.

And you were not prepared for that sight, at all.

Not with how Joel's shirt was clinging tight to his body, damp with sweat, the way his jeans looked so good around his thighs and his butt, or how he flexed his biceps unconsciously while he forced the warped wood forwards, the soft grunt he let out and how his huge hand wiped the forehead off his forehead was enough to set your core on fire. You stood there, at the bottom of the stairs, gripping the handrail and wondering when you'd become that thirsty for a man. Even when you had relationships after your divorce, you couldn't remember being that easily turned on, but at that moment, a mere display of Joel's roughness was enough to pool your wetness on your panties. He was just so mainly, so strong, something primal and intense about that man's body, he was different from any man you'd met, and the years only added to it, you were so tired of fighting your urges and feelings. Yes, Joel had been the worst husband a woman could've asked for, but just because you wanted to crazily ride on his cock, it didn't mean you would have to marry him again, definitely not. Joel wasn't a good husband, but he was a damn fine lover.

“I didn't see you there” you jumped at Joel's voice, distracted by it as he snapped you out of your lustful thoughts, nodding at him and smiling nervously. He cleared his throat “I'm guessing you want to talk, don't you?” There was a slight hint of disappointment in his voice and you thought for a while

“Yeah, we need to talk, just… take a seat, I'll get you some water” you pointed at your couch and disappeared into the kitchen, finding Joel standing still when you returned with a fresh bottle of water for him. He hadn't moved, something inside of him telling him not to, some kind of superstition, that maybe if he sat down he would go back to the poor reality of his life, a life without you, your touch, your caress. As long as he stood up, he could always find something to do around your home and then spend a little longer by your side. He took the bottle with a nod in gratitude and took a big sip of it, at the same time it seemed you were watching an erotic movie just by the way your body reacted to the image of his neck, the way his veins pumped as he swallowed his water, showing his thirst, and to think just a few hours before he was eating your pussy with the same ferocity, made you press your thighs together. You needed that man, and you were going to have him, no matter what. To hell with needing to have a serious chat, to move on with your life and not forgetting the past, you needed him carnally. Joel finished his water and finally walked to your couch, taking a seat and spreading his legs, just like he often did to find a comfortable position. You hated when men did that, taking up space and being rude, but not Joel, the way he did it was hot, it reminded you of how big he was, his long legs, big, strong thighs, so perfect to ride, and his frowny face, you could tell he was worried, probably thinking you would just thank him for the help, tell him what happened between the two of you couldn't happen again and ask him to leave. Hiding the heartbreak under his mean face, little did he know that conversation would have to be postponed, because your mouth was about to be too busy to talk.

“You want to talk, right?” He asked, nervously running his hands through his jeans, watching as you took another step closer and nodded.

“Yeah, but we can't talk right now… I'd rather use my mouth for something else” you winked at him, falling onto his knees and began caressing his thighs over his rough jean, smirking at his surprised face, hands fiddling his pants as you opened his fly and bit your lips

“I need your cock now, Joel, I need you in my mouth”

He was taken aback by your sudden change of behavior, he'd sat down expecting to be told to leave, but now he had you on your knees begging for his cock and that was something he couldn't deny. His left hand gripped your hair, tilting your head up a little, while his right hand stroked your cheek gently, his thumb ghosted over your lips, tracing an invisible path on it as he nodded. Suddenly, roles were reversed: he wasn't waiting for you to stop and decide what he should do, instead, he was in charge and he was about to make you choke on his cock.

“So pretty, baby girl…” Joel's voice wasn't much more than a whisper “you want my cock, don't you? Just like a filthy little slut, you wanna choke on it? Want my cum down your pretty throat?”

All you could was nod at his filthy words, Joel's mouth could drive any woman inside without any physical touch, just his dirty choice of words was enough to cause a turmoil of feelings and increase the pool in your panties. He lifted his hips and pulled his pants down, freeing his cock, already hard and held it by the base, while you licked your lips. You could see his tip glistening and closing your eyes as Joel rubbed his tip against your lips, before you opened it and took his cock into your mouth. Joel threw his head back and groaned in pleasure, he could feel his balls quivering while both hands flew to your hair, gripping it as you bobbed your head up and down his shaft, your hand squeezing and stroking his cock up and down where you couldn't reach his length. You'd always loved Joel's groans, the way he sounded so voracious, you clenched your thighs together, trying to give your throbbing clit some sort of relief. He guided you through his blowjob, he hadn't gotten a good one like that in years; of course he'd had his affairs, nightstands and such, but no mouth in the world compared to yours at all. He praised you, reminded you were his favorite cock slut and he wouldn't have any other than you.

You could feel by the way he clenched in your mouth his release was close, he was about to unload and you wanted to swallow all of him. So you continued, even when Joel tried to lift your head gently and warn you, you didn't need any warnings, you simply continued blowing him until he was cumming into your mouth. He reached his orgasm with another grunt, at the same time you worked your magic and swallowed every single drop of him. The way his cock pulsed inside of your mouth, how his breathing got rapid, his chest raising up and down at a fast pace, it was the sexiest thing you'd ever seen. Joel Miller was a strong, manly man, and you loved it.

He finally rested his eyes on you, his hell and heaven on earth, and he just needed more of you, convinced that whatever he had of you just wasn't enough. He helped you up, then pulled you to his lap, making you squeak in surprise as you landed right on top of him. You rested your forehead against his, while he pressed your body closer, never wanting to let go. He pulled you for a kiss, your lips tasting like him, sent Joel another wave of lust and need; he kissed your neck, his hands fiddling with your clothes, getting rid of them as he wanted you bare for him, your body on his, naked; he wanted to take you inside your house, not just some dirty, rushed secret locked in his room, but instead, claim you in any room of your home, if you ever wanted to break with him and decide he shouldn't be part of your life any longer, then at least he would leave his mark knowing each time you walked into any room, you would think of him, reminded of the time Joel fucked you and emptied himself inside of your tight juicy cunt.

“Come on, darling, ride my cock” his rough voice commanded you at the exact time Joel's hand pulled your shorts and your panties down. He went for your ass, massaging it, squeezing your cheeks and slapping it a couple of times, seeing it wiggle softly

“You're so fucking hot, you know that, sugar? Only you can make my cock throb the way you do” he praised you. His fingers traveled to your cunt, caressing it for the second time that day, making you spread your legs as wide as you could over him. He stroked your clit, feeling your arousal pooled in your entrance, it was intoxicating to him, he needed you every single day for the rest of his life. He gripped your hips, helping you lift yourself up and as held his cock in place and sank down onto it.

“Just like that, gorgeous, take that cock baby girl” he praised you.

You spent the rest of your afternoon riding Joel on your couch, not giving a single shit if any of the neighbors could see it through the curtains or the mere fact Joel had given you the worst heartbreak of your life; you needed him as much as he needed you, and it seemed neither of you could let go.

•••

The following days went by exactly the same way they usually did: you either worked from home or you went to the office a few times a week, you went grocery shopping, led a quiet, normal life, received Sarah's visits almost daily with the exception you were also seeing her dad without her having any idea. In fact, no one apart from you and Joel knew what was going on, and neither of you had any intention of changing that. Being completely honest, you should have broken things up with Joel the morning after, but each time you decided to do so, you simply couldn't get it done, the mere thought of standing in front of Joel and asking him to stay away from you was devastating, even if you turned to your memories of the day you found out Joel was in love with Angela and didn't want to be with you any longer couldn't help you. Of course they were as painful as if they were fresh, but at the same time it also felt like it happened between two completely different people rather than you and Joel. It was so difficult to process that Joel and your current Joel were the same, because deep down your heart claimed they weren't; the Joel you were constantly hooking up with was a hardworking, a great father, he was caring, sweet, he was passionate and he treated you as if you were the best thing he'd ever seen in the whole world. He'd become a closed man to relationships due to the guilt he felt for treating you the way he did and the abandonment he suffered from Angela. As much as that sounded twisted, the fact you were both abandoned by people you loved, also brought you closer, especially because he got to know exactly how you felt, which increased his guilt. It was terrible, but he was aware he was probably going to carry that for the rest of his life; even if he watched you smile and laugh, or if you wrapped your arms around him, underneath the joy and excitement he felt within, there would always be a tad of guilt just like a bitter taste in his mouth, reminding him of his coward attitude and how much better than him you truly were. As you had told Joel while you still hadn't crossed the line of how far your relationship should go, the problem wasn't the fact he fell in love with Angela, that could've happened to anyone, even if the sting of rejection hurt, being tricked and lied to was way worse than that. Even if it was hard to recover from the pain - if you had even recovered at all, after all, more than a decade went by without you being able to have a commitment to anyone, unable to stay in a relationship for more than other a few months, - you could only imagine Joel's experience was even worse; not only his relationship with Angela ended, but she also cut her ties with her own baby daughter. The disappointment he felt to realize his daughter would have to grow up without her mom, the paralyzing fear of being on his own to raise a baby, must've been intense. And even if some people could actually laugh at how funny life can be and swear there was still some kind of divine justice lurking around and he was simply paying for everything he'd done to you, you couldn't find the amusement in that situation, it was so sad, you could only feel pity. It seemed to you the years had turned Joel into a silent companion of pain, and not so much into the villain you'd projected onto him.

And all that was only the rational side of the story, because if you left it all to your feelings and desires, you wouldn't be able to leave his bed. Perhaps you were both feeling an overloaded amount of everything you had repressed for each other over the years; being able to externalize it was addictive, at first it was thought to be an inch you both needed to scratch, but soon enough it became obvious it was way more than that, which caused you to fall into his arms whenever you tried to make things easier for the two of you and simply let this condemned relationship go.

As you closed your laptop and watched Sarah's brows furrowing at the paper in front of her, in a mixture of focused and cranky for not being able to solve another math problem easily, she reminded you of Joel and how he would get the same way and have the same expression whenever he got frustrated with something not going according planned. You gently placed your hand on top of hers and offered her a reassuring smile, Sarah had had her nails done by you earlier, proud to see how pretty the sparkly color got on contracts with her skin. She was such a beautiful girl and you enjoyed being able to help her discover that, by introducing simple things like that, which meant the world to her, since she didn't have a mom around, it was nice doing stuff like that with someone experienced who could give her advice on school, friends and boys. She really appreciated it and if it were for Sarah, she would find a way to set you up with her dad and become one small family.

“you should have a break, you've been stuck in this question for a long time, try again later” you advised her and even if she sighed in a gruff way, - again, so Joel Miller coded - she nodded, closing her notebook and checking up her nails discreetly, which brought a warmth into your heart.

“So…” you started, hoping you would sound convincing enough and not raise any kind of suspicions from her, after all, that girl was smart “...you told me your dad is coming to pick you up, right? When he does, invite him inside so you guys can have dinner with me” you suggested, even if you and Joel had already agreed on it. You hadn't been able to see each other in a few days let alone touch each other, which was actually what you both really wanted, so all the options you got were texting like a bunch of horny teenagers. Now, sending nudes to a guy was something you would strongly disagree several months ago, but now? Each time your phone buzzed, you rushed to it, in hopes to get yet another picture of Joel's big hand holding his cock by its base, so you could lock yourself in any room and pull down your bra and panties, exactly the way he liked it. So spending some time around Joel even if you both had to play it cool was better than nothing. Sarah agreed but still felt a little puzzled at your suggestion.

“Alright… but why? You're regretting saying no when I tried to set you up?” She chuckled and you rolled your eyes, hoping you weren't so obvious. You moved to the kitchen and invited her to come along, so she could help you with dinner. You opened the fridge and had your back to Sarah, while you picked the meat and the vegetables.

“No, it's just that your dad was so nice to me, he fixed my front door after the break in, it would be a nice way to repay” you said “why do you even say that?”

“I think dad has a girlfriend or something…” she shrugged and you stopped, looking at her and trying to control the shock over your face.

“Y-yeah? And how do you know it?”

“Well, dad's different now, he seems happier, more cheerful, he's very often texting on his phone…”

“And what do you think of that?”

“It's nice, I guess” Sarah licked her lips “dad deserves to be happy, he's been lonely for a long time, ever since my mom left…” she said “but uncle Tommy says dad was sad before that, apparently there was another girl before mom, it didn't work between them or dad made her go away, I don't know why, but uncle Tommy told me once that even when he was with my mom, he couldn't forget about her an-”

“What happened then?” Only after you said it you realized you interrupted Sarah and sounded a little crazy, she didn't understand why you were so into that story after all, but seeing how eager you were to hear the ending of it, she continued.

“Well, according to uncle Tommy dad never forgot that girl, but she was way out of his league by the time my mom had left, so my dad sort of gave up dating” she shrugged “then my dad got home and interrupted uncle Tommy when he was about to tell me the full story, and he never spoke about it since” she replied with a simple shrug and pointed at the meat you were about to roast

“Hey, that's my dad's favorite!” She said amused at the coincidence of menus which you knew damn well that wasn't a coincidence, but your treat to Joel. As you kept cooking with Sarah's help, you also thought about the story she'd told you, too many things happening at once: finding out Joel had never forgotten you while his daughter was sure he had a mysterious girlfriend, which of course, was also you.

During dinner, you tried your best to forget about all of that, the way Joel and Sarah fit so well in that scene, the three of you at the table, eating and sharing how your days had been seemed like a beautiful painting of a perfect little family. A portrait of what things could've been like, or should have been like, and you enjoyed it, you couldn't deny it at all. Your gaze met Joel's and you shared a smile, silently agreeing you were spending a family time; you wondered if some day that would actually happen and if you would indeed be a family with Joel, sometimes you thought you would like it, and sometimes you would brush it off as some momentary lapse. But when he reached for your hand under the table and held it, caressing your knuckles with his thumb, your heart raced one more time and you couldn't help but allow yourself to picture a life by his and Sarah's side.

When you were all finished, Joel gladly dismissed his daughter from having to help with the dishes and the moment you two noticed she was fairly entertained with the new books you'd bought, he stole a kiss from you. It was quick but sweet and as much as it left you all giggly and blushing, it wasn't enough. Your need for Joel was overpowering, it was addictive, and you needed to touch him. Nothing would happen between the two of you while Sarah stood just a few feet away, Joel would never risk being caught that way, he respected his daughter too much, but he would kill to have his hands all over your body. He thought of asking you on a escapade with him, but he wasn't sure if it was a good idea, not with Sarah being a little suspicious of how friendly you were acting towards each other. He wondered if he could actually call you his girlfriend, if he could admit he was dating you, because that's what it felt like, but then, if you both came clean about the situation, it would get complicated, not only for him because of Sarah, but he was well aware you would be in a tricky situation with your family, since he knew for a fact your parents hated him, - with plenty reasons to do so - eventually, you would two would have to have the talk. Now, Joel didn't fear not being with you any longer, he knew that wouldn't happen, you were as attached to him as he was to you, but eventually, you would have to define that situation. He knew he could be cold and distant, but it was so damn hard for him to hide his passion, the way he leaned against the doorframe and watched as you carefully put the dishes away, looking every bit of sexy as you could be, not that young and naive little wife he kept at home before he screwed things up, but instead, the powerful, beautiful woman you grew to be.

Sarah was incredibly smart, but she was also naive at some level, which caused her to be oblivious to the fact you called Joel into the backyard at some point, asking him to check something up you wanted it fixed, only to pull him closer and kiss him deeply, gripping his body, wanting him to engulf you like he always did, your nails gently scratching down his back while his lips ravished yours.

“I want to spend the night with you so bad, baby girl” he whispered against your lips “you're so good to me, you treat Sarah like a princess, you cooked us my favorite meal, all I want is to show my gratitude by getting lost between these beautiful thighs” he teased and for a split second you felt like telling him to stay the night, to come clean and tell Sarah you were dating, dating as if you two were pretty much a decade younger and so eager to be in each other's arms, but it couldn't happen that way, not like that, and not at that moment. You nibbled his bottom lip a couple of times before letting go, your body tingled for him, aching for his touch and as he told you he would call Sarah to go home, you felt unannounced tears flooding your eyes for no reason. Why did things have to be so complicated, why Joel couldn't have been this good from the beginning? You could've lived more than a decade of happiness together, if it weren't for that.

As they said their goodbyes, you watched Joel's truck disappear from your eyesight, a pang in your chest insisting on saying it was your family leaving while you played too hard to get.

•••

You had never seen Sarah smile that wide as she did while you two walked around the mall; side by side, a bunch of bags in hands as you spent such a simple, and yet incredible quality time together. For her, it was like hanging out with the mom she never had, and you felt as if you were shopping around for the daughter you could never conceive. It didn't matter where you were going, which stores you were checking and not even exactly what you were buying, just the fact you were doing that together felt incredibly special. It all began when Sarah complained about not having what to wear to the Harry Styles concert in the upcoming week; after months of begging her dad and uncle Tommy, she was given a ticket to the presentation she'd been dreaming of watching, under the condition she wasn't going to drag her dad along. Joel was an amazing dad, and he would do almost about anything for her, but standing in line for hours and then having to watch that guy performing while an entire stadium of hysterical teenage girls would be screaming at the top of their lungs which would probably cause Joel to go deaf in his good ear was a hard pass, that he wouldn't do. In fact, he would. The moment she gave him her puppy eyes and asked him to take her, he would do it, even if he tried tricking himself, however, luck seemed to be standing by his side, as Tommy happened to start dating this chick who was also obsessed with that Harry guy and when she got herself and Tommy a ticket, Sarah was all set. And so was Joel, because without anyone knowing, he managed to get a free night with you. And in the blink of an eye, you and Joel seemed way more excited for the Harry Styles concert than Sarah.

So when she complained she didn't actually have anything nice to wear, you thought of doing that for her, it would be fun, a change of just staying inside reading books, you could spend some girl time together and while you were out with her, you could really watch Sarah, the way she behaved, how she talked and acted, it reminded you so much of Joel, you wondered if she'd taken anything from Angela at all, deep inside, you wish she didn't, even if it was a petty thing to do. The idea of Sarah being similar only to her dad was nothing but comforting and sweet to you, it was the easiest way to see the evolution he went through, unfortunately, he had to learn how to be a better person through the pain, but he had succeeded and that was what it really mattered. You didn't really care if you'd spent a lot on Sarah, you had the money after all, and she deserved it. She was happy, talking excitedly about several things, to the point she barely noticed when Joel walked towards the two of you. He had his jacket on, hair a little messy from the wind as he grinned shyly at the sight of you, his heart skipping a beat as it felt to him he was meeting his daughter and wife at the mall.

Sarah frowned, amused to see her dad, walking towards him, she hugged him, which surprised Joel a little, not expecting that gesture at that very moment.

“What are you doing here, dad?” She asked curiously as Joel greeted you by giving you a peck on the cheek, trying so hard not to seem he was practically drooling over you.

“Tommy needed to buy his girlfriend whatever and asked me for a ride, so while he disappeared into the crowd I was trying to find him” he explained and stared at you “you girls are having fun, I see?” He raised his eyebrow and Sarah eagerly nodded, lifting her bags a little and showing him everything you'd bought her. He was so thankful for everything you were doing for his daughter, especially because he was sure you did it out of kindness and the fact you care about her. You watched their interaction and bit your lips in anticipation, you felt a sudden urge to kiss Joel in front of everyone and walk around the mall holding hands with him, you had never discussed that before, but the thought of it made your heart race. Sarah exchanged a few words with her dad before her eyes went wide as she spotted one of her best friends a couple of stores ahead and smiled big

“Dad, can I go show Nat the things I got? Please?! I'll be right back!” She asked with her sweet eyes and Joel agreed, telling her you two would be around as he intended to keep you company. As you walked towards another store with Joel following you, Sarah soon got entertained with her friend in an ice cream booth nearby. You both chuckled at the scene and he quickly placed his hand on the small of your back.

“Is Tommy really shopping around for his girlfriend or were you just stalking us?” You teased Joel, entering the lingerie store, earning a gasp from him before he could actually answer your question.

“Don't even think about it, Miller, I'm here just to buy some sports bra to go to the gym and nothing more” you added but the mischievous look in his eyes was extremely well-known.

“That's a shame, because this one would look so good on you” he pointed at a lilac lacey pair of underwear, his mouth watering at how beautiful you would certainly get in it, and how stripping you out of all that lace would feel like unwrapping a Christmas gift. You frowned at him, reminding him you were just there to buy a couple of things and leave, in fact, you shouldn't have even let Joel get inside the store with you, it wouldn't be appropriate and how would he explain to Sarah what the hell he was doing there in the first place. Joel, on the other hand, was pretty much entertained by all the beautiful colors and shapes the tiny pieces of fabric came with; he could picture every inch of your body in them, trying to guess which ones would look better. He knew all of them would be just perfect, but he was a guy who was simply drawn to the traditional good old red lacey; it was gorgeous, and it would be a nice gift for the two of you. As he looked around to find you and show you what he'd decided to treat you to, you were nowhere to be seen; the sales clerk already busy with the new customers walking into the store, he decided to wander after you. He was thankful no one seemed to mind nor notice him there, too worried to be seen as a creep, but determined to find you nonetheless; as he got to the fitting room area, he quickly called your name.

“What now, Joel?!” You immediately replied from the one in the corner, slightly annoyed at the fact he'd followed you there, sometimes Joel was a little like a stray puppy, coming after you with those big sad brown eyes, and even if you wanted to shop for freaking sports bras on your own, you couldn't help but enjoy the fact he was just so needy of you.

When Joel opened the door and got inside, you even tried to argue and ask him what the heck he was doing there, but instead, he smirked, gripping your sides and kissing you as a way to keep you silent. You wanted to push him away and tell him to fuck off, but the rushing adrenaline you felt through your veins made you feel alive, and as always, Joel's touch set you on fire. He broke the kiss dragging his lips over to your neck and then your collarbone, his hands climbing up your sides and going to your breasts, squeezing them softly

“This sports bra ain't bad, but I'd say a work of art like your body should have more lace, or glitter or whatever shit you like” he said in a grunt and lowered your top, even against your protests that weren't much more than just some whimpers that couldn't convince you, let alone Joel. You could feel his beard scratching down your chest and going straight to your breasts, lips wrapping around your nipples as he suckled on it gently at first, flicking it with his tongue before moving to your other breast and working the same magic. Your heart raced to the point you could feel your blood rushing through your ears, the fact you both could be caught at any moment and kicked out of the store, or even worse: be arrested for public indecency, added a hint of fear to the traditional lust you had for Joel; that man would be the dead of you, that much you were sure of.

“We can't Joel…” you mumbled against his curls, his head on your chest as his fingers found their way down your belly, getting so close to your sweet spot, he was so needy of you, wanting all of you to the point it felt he would go crazy. His digits toyed with the hem of your panties, while you pulled his curls a little, making him groan.

“Sorry honey” you whispered and kissed this temple, which made him smile. Joel was about to finger you in a fitting room in the middle of a store and you were so sweet to him, it made his heart ache a little, at the realization he definitely didn't deserve you. He kissed you once more and nibbled your lower lips the moment his fingers reached your core, spreading your lips apart and finding your needy clit, already so hard and wet, just for him to enjoy. He wasn't going to tease you, you both didn't have time for it, so instead, he played with your wetness, before shoving his fingers inside of you, stretching you up the way you both knew and enjoyed it, he thumbed with your clit before focusing all his ministrations into your tight cunt, feeling your muscles squeezing and clenching around him. He'd kill to have his cock inside of you instead of his fingers, but that would have to wait. He felt your teeth on his shoulder, while your pussy gushed at the same time you came for him. He felt your body going limp, sustaining your weight with his free hand

“Taste yourself, princess” he whispered against your ear and held his fingers up, waiting for you to wrap your devilish lips around them and lick them clean. Joel felt the urge to take you right there and then, but he was a patient man and knew things would have to wait. He kissed your lips goodbye and exited the fitting room after making sure no one was around to see him.

The sales clerk was a little confused when she saw Joel walking towards the register with a blood red pair of lacey lingerie, she couldn't remember seeing him walk into the store and let alone hang around, but the work policy forced her to smile at him and be helpful, especially when he got his wallet out and extended his credit card.

“I'd like you to gift wrap this and give it to the beautiful lady who's trying sports bra in the fitting room, tell her it's my treat” he winked at the woman, aware he could use his charms in his own favor. She agreed to his request and he left the store just like any other ordinary customer, at the same time you received the package as a present the moment you tried paying for your stuff.

•••

After waiting what it seemed like forever, the Harry Styles concert was about to happen, which caused Joel to have a break from his brother, his girlfriend Maria and Sarah, who insisted they all spend hours waiting in line. His heart was full of joy and pride to see how happy his precious daughter was, the way she could barely sleep at night and that guy was the only thing she ever talked about. It was amusing to him, even if he ran out of patience from time to time, it was amazing to see his little girl looking like a beautiful young woman in her new outfit bursting with happiness. Joel couldn't also complain about the fact he managed to enjoy a full day by himself and get ready to receive you through the night. He'd gone grocery shopping, buying all the kinds of treats he knew you loved - or used to, as people could often change their personal taste over the years, but instead of seeing that with sadness, he felt glad to be able to learn something new about the woman he was madly in love with. He was going to go for some beer, but Joel thought again and decided to pick some wine, he just thought you were more of a wine kind of woman, more elegant than just cheap beer.

What you both hadn't counted on, was how hot the weather was, even if the sun had set down, it was still uncomfortable to remain inside, which made Joel suggest you both should move your date night to the swimming pool. At first you thought he was joking, but the stern look on his face told you he was being completely serious, and you thought it was a nice change. The way Joel took the bottle of wine, the glasses and simply began undressing without a word made you puzzled, until he turned around and told you to take off your clothes as well.

One skinny-dipping adventure and a quicky in his pool later, you both took sips of your wine, as you pressed yourself against him; Joel's arms were tight around your body as you rested your head on his chest, kissing it gently, and listening to his heartbeats, it was scary how out of the sudden, his arms became your favorite place in the world. You were far too deep into this story, and there was no way out without getting hurt, but that wasn't the time to think of that, you didn't want to have those kinds of thoughts, you wanted to spend your time with Joel and get lost into him, just as he was into you.

“Sarah told me you have a girlfriend” you blurted out, making Joel raise his eyebrow at you and looking down at you

“What?!”

“Well, she said you seemed happier lately, always texting someone, sneaking out here and there…” you chuckled “I wonder who that bitch is” Joel laughed at your comment, his hand sliding down your back and resting on your ass, squeezing it and then pecking your lips.

“She ain't no bitch, I can assure you that much” he said gently and nuzzled your neck “she's gorgeous, she's the best thing that's ever happened to me, well, after Sarah, of course, but still, and she was so kind to forgive me after everything I've done” his lips were back on your cheek and then on your lips “and I love her very much”

For a moment your whole world stopped. Joel loved you. He admitted it out loud, it wasn't just a matter of simple assumptions, but rather a concrete, explicit feeling. You opened your mouth looking at him hesitantly, what exactly should you say? What could you tell Joel? Did you love him back? If so, were you ready to admit it and face the consequences of getting back together with the man who caused the biggest emotional trauma of your life. Joel took his hands off your body and looked at you with a hint of disappointment, even if he didn't want to admit it, he was disappointed, he thought you shared the same feeling as he did, so he sighed and nodded.

“It's fine, you don't have to say it back…” he cleared his throat and swam to the ladder of the pool “it's getting a little chilly, I think we should get inside”

•••

A few days later, your conversation with Joel simply wouldn't leave your mind; you were in love with him, it was impossible for anyone not to notice, him included, and yet, you didn't understand why it was so hard for you to simply admit it. Perhaps, if you did it, then it would become real, and your relationship with him would stop being a fun, little secret shared by the two of you, but rather a concrete relationship between two adults, where you'd eventually have to come clean and open up to family, friends, you would celebrate birthdays and holidays, anniversaries and face several, typical questions coming from all sides, wondering if you would both remarry or have kids. It was overwhelming, but not as bad as how you were feeling at that moment. You felt guilty and embarrassed, and the paranoid side of you was convinced Joel had been avoiding you for the past week, whereas Sarah was at your place nearly everyday, still talking about Harry Styles and showing you countless pictures of the concert, he wouldn't text much nor insist to see you, even when you suggested him to sneak out late at night and go to yours, he politely declined by saying Tommy and him got a new big client and work was rushed and soul crushing. Of course he could be telling you the truth, he did sound exhausted on the phone and Sarah had mentioned Joel and Tommy had been arriving late most days, both of them covered in sweat and in such a bad mood due to the unbelievable amount of work they were having. Yet, what should make you feel calm and at ease, didn't help one bit, it was uncomfortable and depressing not having Joel around, you missed him, his touch, his body but mostly his presence. He'd been a constant in your life for the past months, and it was only taking a week for you to feel abandoned. It wasn't fair to you, and yet, it wasn't fair to him either, not when he declared his love for you and you couldn't even say it back. You placed your living room, not sure whether you should drive to his home or not, in fact, you knew you shouldn't, but you wanted to, because that particular day, not even Sarah showed up, and it made you sad. You were so attached to the little family destiny set apart for you, simply a day or two away from them was enough to cause a large wound in your heart. You looked around, looking for an excuse to show up at the Miller's household; until your eyes widened and you grinned to see Sarah's history book lying around your coffee table. It was the perfect excuse to go and see them! Perhaps you could even end up having dinner with them, and then make up an excuse about a flat tire or whatever, have Joel giving you a ride home and end up being railed by him in the back of his truck. The longing for Joel was increasing and all you wanted was to make things right by explaining him you did have feelings for him and you needed some time, but you were willing to make sacrifices in order to be with him, because you wanted to and it was important for you that he saw how appreciated he was by you.

On your way to Joel's, you stopped at a bakery you knew Sarah loved, thinking of all the delicious treats you could take so you'd keep your family spoiled, at least a little. You smiled at yourself the moment you chose a couple of cupcakes, cookies and the chicken pie Joel loved, thinking of how you were already addressing them as your family. The truth is that they were indeed your family, the connection you three had was strong, the bond you created with Sarah without even knowing for a fact who she was and later on all that passion for Joel surfacing after spending a decade buried deep inside of you. It was a waste of time fighting that, and you wanted to get to them as soon as possible, you'd been alone far too long, it was about time to yourself have one good thing, to break free and admit how happy you were next to the Millers. You loved them just as they loved you, and it made no sense to fight that feeling and pretend it didn't exist.

The ride wasn't long, there was hardly any traffic in the suburbs, most families were already inside, having dinner together as the sun had set and the street lights were all lit up, as you parked your car, you saw Joel's truck in the driveway and felt your chest tightening in anxiety and fear; if he was already home why didn't he call or text you? Maybe he was indeed avoiding you?! Joel wouldn't make the same mistake twice and push you away, would he? You shook your head, you had faith in him, faith you both had matured and were able to handle things by talking and being honest with each other; you licked your lips and sighed, knowing that whatever was going on could be solved by the two of you as two functional adults, besides, there were a bunch of explanations to why he hadn't talked to you that day yet, you shouldn't jump to conclusions and let your paranoia win once more. You got out of the car with the bag full of treats and walked to the front door, you knocked a couple of times and waited for an answer but nobody came. It was odd, as you could hear Joel's and Sarah's voices coming from inside, and even if you couldn't tell what they were saying your heart raced, your gut feeling telling you something was up and you couldn't wait any longer, silently opening the door and getting inside. You placed the bag of food down the coffee table as you could clearly hear what they were saying. It seemed Joel and Sarah were arguing, which was extremely odd, since you had never seen them have any kind of disagreement, they just had a real nice and healthy father and daughter relationship in which they both listened to each other and acted with respect. As you approached, you heard Sarah's cries and you were taken by worry, perhaps someone had died? You couldn't wait any longer, you rushed and got into the kitchen, confused at first at what had happened between them, Joel looked so overwhelmed, his face was red and he desperately tried to make a point while telling Sarah a bunch of information she could barely cope with, as she cried in disappointment and shook her head, not believing anything her dad was saying. Her heart was shattered with disappointment and sadness, she couldn't believe her dad, her hero, the man she loved and admired the most in her life had done such a thing.

On the kitchen table, a photograph taken on your wedding day was lying around. A younger version of yourself hugged a much younger Joel as you both stood in front of the courthouse, smiling widely at the camera. There was no way to deny it nor hide it. Sarah had found out about your previous connection god knows how and Joel seemed desperate as he wanted to explain himself to his daughter, he couldn't bear having her so disappointed in him like that, it shattered his heart into a million pieces.

“Sarah…” you whispered and tried touching her cheek, wanting to caress it gently and assure her everything was fine now, that what had happened was in the past and that her dad was still the best father a girl could ever wish for. But Sarah moved her face away from your touch, her eyes were glistening with tears as she seemed so heartbroken

“You both lied to me! Why did you lie?” She asked and you looked at Joel wanting to have some kind of support in order to reply to her question.

“Sarah, we are both sorry, but your dad and I have made up after what happened, I know it's a lot to take now but don't be upset please” you asked her, Joel nodded and wrapped his arm around your waist in order to show her things were fine between the two of you. He promised to talk to her and explain everything to her in detail, but she was just so upset, feeling betrayed by the person she admired and loved the most in the whole world. You knew there was nothing you both could do at that moment, not with Sarah being so nervous and upset, instead, you asked Joel to call Tommy and suggested that he took her out for ice cream or something, maybe have a little chat with his niece while you and Joel could sit down and figure the best way to tell her everything. It didn't take more than twenty minutes for his younger brother to arrive, Sarah had drunk some water and washed her face, leaving with Tommy as you sat next to Joel. You took his hand and caressed it, while he refused to look you in the eye, the guilt and shame once more eating him alive, and now it had become even worse, as his precious little Sarah had found out the truth about him in the worst way possible. All she needed was an old picture for her school project and going through Joel's old memory box should be enough, and then she came across the pictures of his wedding day. Not to her mom, but to you instead, and then it all made sense: why you were never willing to be around her dad, or how you decided to keep yourself away from any kind of relationship. Because the asshole you told her you'd married once, was simply her father. The good old Joel Miller, the man who had to raise his baby daughter on his own after she left him, and then, Sarah had found out her dad had been really bad to someone so dearly to her. You, you could've been married to her dad, you could've been her mom, she could've had a family all along.

You looked at Joel and wiped a single tear that rolled down his cheek, even if he tried to hide it.

“What are we doing now, Joel?”

“I don't know…”

____

A/N: what a ride, right besties? Remember, feedback is life ❤️

[drdemonprince]

So, I (a trans guy) am kind of coming to terms with the fact that I might be more gay than bisexual after all. Where I live, the queer community is split pretty definitively between the "women, non binary and trans people" (or FLINTA*, if you're familiar with that horrible term) and the gay male community. While I have lots of problems with the former, it is kind of the community I am in, mostly because it has felt safe during my transition. It still feels safe, but not really comfortable. I want to feel like I am part of the gay male community, especially if I mostly want to date queer men in the future.

I am like, so scared of existing in any gay male spaces. When I tried being in them pre T, I felt like an imposter. When I travelled to the US a few years ago, the only place my then partner (also on T) and me were misgendered consistently was in gay bars (in a lot of famous "gay friendly" cities). All of this has left me with a sense of humiliation and not-belonging that gets reactivated every time I even think of stepping into one again, even if I am fairly certain I would not get this reaction now.

How do I get past the shame that is attached to my previous experiences and learn to actually enjoy myself there?

So, I believe that you have the order of operations wrong here. You don't get past shame and then go out to these gay spaces -- you go out to those gay spaces and then overcome (some) of your shame. And that shame may live with you forever in some form. You can still have a worthwhile life with it.

Go to the gay bars. There are many different kinds of them, all with wildly different energies and clientelle, and it is normal and boring and blase for trans guys to be at each and every single one of them.

One way that many newbies unwittingly screw up is by going to the most circuity, dance-y kinds of gay bars that tend to be filled with young, thin, rich, superficial people -- and then they mistake the meanness of that crowd for the meanness of all gays, or interpret the meanness as a sign they are not accepted by "the gay male community."

There is no singular gay male community. There are in fact a wide variety of subcultures with their own beauty standards, stylistic choices, interests, and norms. And there's a lot of cliquishness and mean girl behavior among people who have decided they are high rank in any particular small subculture, don't get me wrong. But you don't have to believe in any of it. They're just coping with their own history of marginalization and rejection by trying to become a new ruling class within their own tiny pond. You can laugh it off as the work of kind of sad, small thinking and just enjoy yourself and talk to people who are not assholes.

So, go to the leather bar. Go to a pup night. Go to an old-timers bar filled with gays over 60 (they will be nice to you and buy you drinks, I promise). Go to a gay bar that's casual and nerdy, with arcade machines and pub trivia. Go to a drag bar on a weekday night and meet some of the newer queens who are still trying to find their chops. And yes, go to the DJ sets and dance clubs all you like, but don't let what a few snatched bitchy 22-year-olds (or insecure former twink 42 year old real estate agents) get you feeling insecure. They're doing that shit because they are insecure.

Bring a friend. Talk to someone who seems nervous and alone on the side of the dance floor, too. Wear an outfit that will get some compliments. Nurse a drink at the bar and trawl grindr to see if anyone seems worth talking to. Join a dungeon or a gay running group. Attend a gay men's support group at your local lgbt center. Meet a ton of people and just get yourself out there, and quickly you will realize that your mind has wildly over dramatized how much you stand out or how much anybody cares.

Fat gays, disabled gays, older gays, Autistic gays, nerdy gays, poor gays, Black and brown gays, immigrant gays, they all feel like they do not belong and are not welcome too. Find them and be kind to them and hold onto them. Notice who is nice and warm with you, but also don't read into it too much if some people are just neutral. Eventually you will figure out what you like doing, which spaces you enjoy inhabiting, and who you want to be there with -- and then you'll have some fun.

[yan-lorkai]

.⁠ ｡⁠*⁠♡ request: May I request Sebastian and Lilia Vanrouge as reader's father figure, pretty please?

.⁠ ｡⁠*⁠♡ A/N: i really like papa lilia, i just know that he would take very good care of the reader if he had the opportunity to adopt you lol. Well, I hope you like it anonie! Also Sebbys part here.

It's faerie custom to steal human children for themselves, so the first moment your eyes met in the cafeteria he knew he needed to keep you close. I mean, you were a cute little thing that was brought into a world where you didn't know anything or anyone. A cute little thing that managed to hold Lilia's attention and focus, and he just can't help but be in awe of your strength and courage.

He's very sweet and attentive when he interacts with you, bordering on condescending, but having a fatherly presence takes a lot of weight off your shoulders so you don't mind too much. Lilia loves helping you with your homework and he explains so well that there is no room for doubt during your study sessions with him. He also likes to show you magic tricks since you don't have magic and teaching you how to cook traditional dishes from this world, for your own good, don't eat anything he cooks.

Every little problem you venture into, every little action you take and every word you speak, papa Lilia is by your side - not that you realize it - protecting you from harm. And slowly getting rid of bad company, he is jealous and possessive of your time as he now sees you as one of his children and you should only interact with him and his sons, they're such good companies.

Malleus absolutely adores your company, he sees how the two of you walk down Ramshackle at night while you talk and laugh and because of him, still accepting the situation, Sebek finds himself spending more time with you, listening to you, trying to understand why Malleus like you so much. Lilia is sure you'll be best friends eventually and oh my, you're even napping next to Silver, you two adorable humans.

Lilia likes to wander around random places and he often takes you and Silver on a walk with him through the woods behind campus while he tells stories of ancient times and collects various fruits. He plans to bake a dessert with these fruits to celebrate the arrival of a new member in his little family.

Lilia likes to teach you about self-defense and sword fighting, slowly training you to defend yourself if he or his kids aren't around. And it's also a fun moment where Sebek and Silver are there to help and motivate you, showing you ways to execute a move if you keep getting it wrong. Your brothers know much about this, they've been training since childhood.

He especially loves watching you interact with others. The shy way you offers Malleus a handcrafted gift, watching the expressions of joy on his face, or how you and Sebek are constantly teasing each other and bickering, but you stick up for him when someone badmouths him. And there's even the loving way you let Silver use your lap for a long, restful nap while you sit under a willow tree. And of course, the way you depend on him, listen to his words and let him comfort you when you hear Crowley say that there is no way to return to your world.

It is especially difficult to notice Lilia's manipulation, but not impossible. He is a loving father who is there for his children but he is also a general and a great strategist, there are little things that over time you can see. The fact that you keep getting sick after drinking something he offered you, the fact that whenever you are with one of them people get scared and move away from you and that all your friends don't spend as much time with you anymore, they don't invite you to parties or study dates, or anything. Still, Lilia convinces you that you're just imagining it and sometimes you wonder if it's true.

While escaping from them would be very difficult due to the power and influence they have, Lilia could use his magic to control people and manipulate situations to ensure that you are always by his side. Or Malleus can put you to sleep to prevent you from running away or getting hurt while you try to fight them. It's all for your own good, darling, they're worried about you.

[simpleeindulge]

It's a Work in Progress

Context: This takes place after a few months of Law setting sail for the first time with Shachi, Bepo, and Penguin. They are a new pirate crew finding their way to the Grand Line. Desperate for funds, Law’s crew resort to kidnapping.

Info: fem/readerxLaw, kidnapping, 1st time meeting, slow-burn romance, multiple parts, cursing, mild threats of violence.

Chapter 1

Ch 2. And You Are…?

Law’s eye visibly twitched at the woman’s words. Of all the things she could have said, she chose to threaten him? Was she that spoiled and stupid?

“I take that you are not a princess.”

“No, I am not.” The woman confirmed sternly and did not offer any other information.

Law internally groaned. From her posture to her eyes and facial expression, he could tell that she was going to make every step of this blasted kidnapping difficult. I should get it over with and throw her into the ocean.

His grey eyes looked her over, taking in her elaborate dress and jewelry.

"But you are a noble."

"Obviously." She quipped. "And you are?"

Her eyes scanned him over exactly as he had done to her, and without tipping her head, she was somehow looking down at him despite being shorter!

"Your captor, that's who, so drop the snobbery. You just went from valuable to basic goods."

"Basic." She repeated with the corner of her lip turned out in amusement.

"That's right," Law smirked back at her. "You're just another noble girl who's full of herself. We could go to any kingdom and find clones of you. The only thing that separates you is how much your family will pay for your return."

The girl then giggled and laughed outright. Penguin and Shachi glanced at each other and then at Law, who was equally perplexed.

She stopped laughing and let out a long sigh.

"You see, that's where you're wrong, Mr. Nobody."

Law's brow twitched. Definitely going to toss her in the ocean. No amount of money is worth her snark!

"My name is Trafalgar Law." He gritted out.

"As I said, a nobody."

Law made to move, but Shachi stepped in quickly.

"Hey now, aren't you a bit cocky for someone being held active by pirates?" He said with a light laugh, though he didn't know why; it must have been the tension between Law and the woman.

She didn't bother looking in Shachi's direction as she spoke in a sweet tone that dripped with condensation.

"Yes, rookie pirates with the most original idea of capturing a princess. Such a basic plan, and your crew couldn't pull it off."

Law growled and looked at Bepo. “Toss her overboard!”

Bepo gaped, and Shachi and Penguin begged Law to rethink his plan. The woman only looked slightly nervous which made him smirk. He was about to repeat his orders when the ship suddenly jolted.

Bepo steadied the woman as she grabbed for him. Before anyone could ask, the ship rocked again, and one of the newest crew members rushed to the doorway.

“Captain! The Royal fleet! They're shooting at us!”

Law looked visibly surprised. Why would a Royal fleet come after them instead of the Navy or Marines over a regular noble? Law then realized his mistake and snapped his head to the woman. He made an assumption before getting more information. A mistake he would have never made before! Damn this woman!

“Who are you?!”

“Lady Y/N Dávila, third cousin to the crown princess, twice removed from her mother’s side.”

She said simply.

The ship rocked again but this time an explosion was heard. Law shouted orders to his men to move the Polar Tang. Law was about to walk past Y/N when he stopped and glared at her.

“I guess I won't be throwing you overboard.”

“Does this mean I became valuable?”

She batted her lashes at Law and he scoffed.

“Hardly.”

He was about to leave the room when he thought of what she had first said.

“What did you mean by, ‘You fucked with the wrong noble family’?”

“Oh, that,” she replied with a laugh. “My father is in charge of the Royal fleet and is…insane.”

Law did not like the way Y/n said that last bit without any arrogance or pride. She even paled a tad at the thought of her father’s mental state.

“You should probably direct your men to do something. Father will probably sink us in an attempt to rescue me. He can get carried away.”

Now she looked nervous and gasped as the ship rocked again, obviously taking another hit. Bepo kept her on her feet once more and Law snapped his attention to him.

“Bepo! Go navigate the ship to a safe location. We need to move and dive before we take any more damage.”

“Yes, Captain!” Bepo cried and immediately left the room.

Y/n watched Bepo leave and then eyed Law carefully. They were alone in the room but she didn't for a second that it increased her chances of escape. She tried to stand straight but the ship rocked once more as it moved while being under attack.

Her hands were still tied before her, so Y/n had to widen her stance under her gown to keep her balance. Her heels didn't help, and she cursed her lady’s maid for not letting her wear the ankle boots. The dress was so long and wide that no one would have noticed.

It felt ridiculous to sway around in a ball gown while trying to put on a brave face. Because she was afraid, terrified. They didn't cover Pirate Abduction 101 in her studies. Discussing pirates as a young unmarried lady wasn't even proper, though they all did it behind their matriarch's back.

The truth was that Y/N had heard of a new rookie pirate named Trafalgar Law. Some nasty rumors surrounded him, and now she was alone in a room with him.

I just had to get plucky with him! Mother always said my rash behavior would get the best of me.

She nervously grinned at the thought, considering that her father might drown her first.

"I wouldn't be so confidant, if I were you."

Y/n glanced up and blinked in surprise. Law was right in front of her. He pushed her, but she made a slight sound as she fell back into an armed chair. Was that chair there before?

Law put his hands on the armrest and leaned in close. His eyes held her captive as she sat with her back pressed. She had to work to breathe and made the mistake of letting her mask of indifference and superiority fall. Like blood in the water, Law smelled her fear and was ready to strike.

"Tell me, if I hand you over right now will your lunatic of a father cease his attack?"

Y/N shook her head. She could hear cannonballs flying and hitting the water around them.

"And if I hulled you on deck and showed you to him?"

Y/N laughed nervously. "That would be like baiting a starving dog. He'll probably aim a shot at you and hope that I survive."

Law growled and slammed his hand down. He knew she wasn't lying because every shot made at the Polar Tang was meant to sink it. An insane but effective tactic. Part of the new repairs made to the ship were already damaged again!

"If I may," Y/n offered carefully. "I might be able to help get us away from my father's bold rescue attempt."

Law stared her down, and Y/n didn't wait for his approval as she explained her plan.

Chapter 3

[quillsareswords]

Soft as Snow

DAMIAN WAYNE X READER

SUMMARY: You and Damian finally get to enjoy a Chistmas in your new home.

A/N: Merry late Christmas and happy holidays! I meant to do a writing week along side this, but things got kind of crazy. This was actually part of a Secret Santa I participated in with some other writers here on Tumblr! I drew @unmotivatedwrit3r! Hope you like it bb :)

Other participants: @citrinesparkles @birdy-bat-writes @glorified-red

WARNINGS: language

MASTER LIST in BIO

DECEMBER 5TH

   He hadn't expected you home until this evening, but your shoes are sitting beside the landing table, beneath the coat hooks, when he gets home. "Beloved?" he calls, hanging his peacoat beside yours.

   "Kitchen!"

   He follows the sound of your voice down the entry hall. He habitually glances into the living room on his way past. Your canvas shopping totes are set on the coffee table, shades of red and green peeking out from inside. He recalls you commenting this morning that you'd stop for groceries on your way home. He should've expected this.

   You're standing in front of the coffee machine when he rounds the doorway. In front of you, stacks of mugs. You smile brightly at him. "Hey! You're home early."

   He peers into the cupboard as he sidles up beside you. You've pulled every mug from the shelves; all shapes and sizes spread and stacked between the wall and the edge of the counter. He hadn't realized there were so many. "So are you."

   You shrug, setting the last of them—a white mug with some vulgar phrase written in cursive—among the rest. "I finished up sooner than I thought, so I got groceries."

   He snakes an arm around your waist, rolls his eyes knowingly. "Let me guess: you went to get groceries, but got distracted and walked away with a new collection of trinkets."

   A wry smile. You reach into the closest bag. A red, green, and white monstrosity spotted in flat black deer outlines. "Christmas mugs don't count as trinkets. Obviously."

   He hums mocking agreeance. "Right. Of course not, dearest." He glances over his shoulder for emphasis, "I assume those are also definitely not trinkets?"

   You smile brightly. "Nope. They're Christmas decorations. Definitely essential."

DECEMBER 11TH

   He tries so hard not to wake you. You'd been busy all day, then gone to bed late because you wanted to see him off for his nightly patrol. You idiot.

   It's not like he doesn't appreciate it. His night always starts off on the wrong foot when he doesn't get a kiss from you beforehand. (It's just bad luck, at this point.) Even so, it's not a good enough reason for you to stay up.

   He won't argue about it again. He won the argument about you waiting up for him to get back; he doesn't like his odds for getting you to bed at a decent time.

   He sneaks around the house carefully, guided only by the light of the Christmas tree and the night lights always glowing in the hallways. He pins his arm to his chest and swerves through the living room, the kitchen. If not getting blood on your carpet was a sport, he'd win the Olympics. Between you and Alfred, he's pretty sure he could get stabbed and leave no evidence in an entirely white room.

   Luckily, it's only a few minor cuts that are dribbling crimson through his suit. All he needs is a few butterfly stitches and some bandage for the worse graze on his forearm.

   Unluckily, he realizes a little too late that the First-Aid kit in the kitchen has not yet been restocked. Which means the only fully stocked kit is the big one…in the master bathroom. The one on the other side of his bed. Your bed. Where you're sleeping. Damn it.

   He's a professionally trained assassin. He's a goddamn ninja, literally. He can sneak up on any person, into any building. You have no formal training. He once witnessed you sleep through an actual earthquake. Somehow, he always wakes you up.

   Not this time. This time, he will not wake you up.

   The Christmas lights wound around your potted plants light his way. He picks across the bedroom, around a pile of the day's clothes, across the rug. He steps over a stray Amazon box. Reminds himself to pick it up later. He's four feet from the door. Victory is close at hand.

   "Damian?"

   You're joking. When he turns, you're propping yourself up in bed, scrubbing sleep out of your eye. How! He didn't make a single sound!

   "You gonna take that off before bed, or..?"

   He sighs, tiredly. "I'm not going to bed yet. Go back to sleep, I won't be long." He whispers, still steps lightly, even if there's no point. He steps close, rests the rough palm of his glove on your cheek, and presses his lips against your temple. "I promise. Go to sleep."

   You hum, still half asleep. "What're you doin'?" You reach up absently, always wanting touch, always seeking him out. Your fingers brush up his arm, and then, wide awake– "You're bleeding. Why are you bleeding?"

   He shakes his head, smoothing a thumb along your cheekbone. "It's only a cut. Nothing to worry about."

Of course, you won't accept this as an answer. He can't convince you to get back into bed once you clamber out from under the blankets, so he follows you into the bathroom and sits on the edge of the bathtub.

You only use the light over sink, leaving the room just light enough to see. The dim lighting echoes the early hours somehow. Neither of you say much, directions aside. It'stoo early for much conversation. You smooth white straps over the minor cuts, a patch on a scrape up his cheek, carefully wind the gause around his arm.

When he's no longer dripping blood on the tile, you go and get a clean set of pajamas while he peels off the uniform and dumps it into the tub. Then, you both shuffle back to the warmth of the bed like moths to flame.

Despite the bandage, his arm is still a comfort when wrapped around you.

DECEMBER 14TH

   "What are you…doing?"

   He looks up from his hands, eyes wide, confused. "I'm– I'm wrapping gifts?"

   You cock your head to one side. You squint. "Oh. That's a box?"

   He blinks once. Twice. "Of course it's a box. What are you talking about?"

   Your face twists like you're not sure if you should laugh or not. "Baby. Look at it."

   He looks back down at the bundle of scotch tape and green wrapping paper. Sure, it doesn't follow every crisp line, and some of those straps of tape are way too long, and when did that corner get torn off? Oh, it's stuck to that piece of tape. Or is that a different corner?

   "Have you ever wrapped a gift before?" You ask slowly, tentatively. You only now realize that maybe you really shouldn't be laughing, if he's never wrapped a present before. He'll take it mockingly, answer defensively, close himself off to save himself the embarrassment.

   His nostrils flare as he stares down at it. "No," he says pointedly. "I don't usually have the time. Pennyworth wrapped them. If I did have time, I used a gift bag."

   You nod, sly little smile working its way across your face. "Makes sense. Is that why everything you give me is small?"

   He blows out a surprised noise, somewhere between a laugh and a sigh. He finally looks up at you again. "You've never complained before. We both know I'm awfully skilled with all sorts of things; the size never matters."

   You roll your eyes. "Oh, sure. Do you want me to show you how to wrap it or not?"

   He chuckles, steps aside, gestures that he's made room for you.

   You step in beside him, in front of the dining room table. In typical Damian Wayne fashion, the workspace is perfectly organized; scissors and tape set neatly on your right, a roll of shiny green wrapping paper on your left, the lumpy mystery package in the middle.

   He lays one hand on the table beside the scissors, leans on it, and props his other hand on his hip. "Please, show me the magical ways of gift wrapping."

   So, you do. You carefully salvage what you can, flatten it, trim it, tape it down. You smooth the edges crisp around the Amazon box. You explain it as you go, even though you know he could watch you do it once and copy it step for step.

   He watches you closely. First, your hands. He really did want you to teach him how you get the gifts under the tree to look so nice. But, he's a weak man at heart when anything concerns you. You always get this look on your face when you're working with your hands. It appears when you fold laundry and wash dishes, too. He catches himself looking at you instead of your instructions.

DECEMBER 20TH

   "That is definitely my sweater."

   "No, it isn't." You have a really bad poker face. Your eyes sparkle too much.

   He crosses his arms, mindful of the cut, still tender on the outside of his arm. "I bought that last year. At your suggestion, if memory serves."

   "I don't know what you're talking about." You upend the hot paper bag in your hand, spilling popcorn into a festive plastic bowl. "This was in my closet."

   "We share a closet."

   You wave your hand dismissively. "Potato, pa-tot-oh." You sprinkle on some salt and hold the bowl out for him.

   He takes it in one hand and waits for the next item. "I don't mind. You know I don't. I do wish you would admit that it's mine."

   You scoff, dumping a box of holiday chocolates into a matching bowl. "Why on earth would I do that?"

   He doesn't answer right away, waits until you glance over at him. "Because I like it when you wear my clothes."

   Your facade washes away under the tides of a grin you can't contain. You turn away instead, pretending to put all your focus on the candy bowl.

   He and his stupid sweet face. He shouldn't be allowed to wear sweaters or smile like that. He smiles at you all the time, much to your joy, but every once in a great while, when the mood catches him right, he gives you this world-healing, puppy-yipping, kitten-soft smile that makes you feel like you're floating. It should be illegal. He should at least give you a warning.

   You decide the fluttering in your chest is a little too much for two o'clock in the afternoon, snowstorm or not, so you change the subject. "What movie should we start with?"

   He takes the cue, he lets you do it; but he keeps staring at you like you like you're the only thing in the house worth looking at. "You decide. You're the better judge."

DECEMBER 25th

   It's been twenty-two minutes since you woke up. You've been killing time, between your phone and the morning newscast on the television across from the bed, but now you're getting suspicious.

   He'd been far too excited for any man who wakes up before sunrise. Christmas Day could be an exception, you suppose—fathers and guardians springing out of bed to watch their children rip open gifts. But Damian? You've never seen him so lit up before lunch.

   Stay in bed, he'd said, the moment you rolled over for a kiss. You did get one, but he leapt out of bed so soon after that you wondered if you should be offended. You should probably explain that be right back usually doesn't mean a half-hour.

   At minute thirty, you debating going and checking on him. You can hear noise, if you strain your hearing over the news anchor. Sizzling? Clanking, definitely. Clinking.

   Footsteps in the hallway. The door knob rattles. Alfred the Cat perks up by your feet. Muffled swearing. Not in English, but you know the tone.

   "Do you…want help?"

   "No," he replies quickly. "Stay in bed."

   You prop yourself up against the pillows and cross your arms. "Don't have to tell me twice."

   There's a long pause behind the bedroom door, before the knob turns and the door swings open. You're pretty sure you see a socked foot reel back out of sight.

   And then, he appears. Despite the brightly colored fleece pajama pants that match the shirt you slept in, he's still all poise and grace with a tray in his hands. He looks awfully proud of himself, like a cat prancing around with a fat mouse in its mouth, green eyes glittering.

   You laugh incredulously. "What is that?"

   He practically struts around to your side of the bed, sets the tray across your lap. "Breakfast, my darling."

   Sure enough, there's enough food to feed you, he, the cat, and the news anchor. Two mugs of coffee, a stack of Christmas tree shaped pancakes, a platter of scrambled eggs, and a bowl of fruit-chunk-filled yogurt.

   He takes your stunned silence as an opportunity to crawl over your legs and settle back down on his side of the bed.

   "What– Why?" You're still laughing, grinning ear to ear. "I mean, this looks delicious, but why?"

   He's smiling, too. "Well," he sighs, "I knew you were excited about Christmas, especially for dinner." Dinner, which was supposed to be held at Wayne Manor tonight, but had to be canceled to accommodate the weather, which decided to cover every side-street in two feet of snow and every major road in ice. "So I decided to…make up for it, I suppose."

[sarnai4]

All In

Spoilers ahead for RTTE. I've seen and read a lot of stories, but I only have one character who's been my favorite hero and villain. That character is Dagur because he always went all in on whichever role he's supposed to play. I think the reason is that most characters are written with one particular role in mind. I've seen some who are meant to become heroes, so they never do anything too bad. They can't seem truly evil because they're eventually going to be good guys. Then, some characters have been part of that untrustworthy/villainous side for so long that even when they're supposed to be good, they do shady things that show how they're almost naturally villains. Neither of these happen with Dagur. When he's bad, he's really a villain; when he's good, he's really a hero. I love that.

I've seen mostly two opinions on Dagur. One where he's this monster who would eat kids in their nightmares and one where he's done nothing wrong. I feel like part of what makes him so amazing is that he did have both sides to him. As an antagonist, Dagur pulled no punches. He had the highest confirmed kill count of any human character. On top of who knows how many merchants he killed (since he was very ready to do that), he killed an entire island worth of Vikings. It's not just that either. He's one of the few villains who consistently tries to kill the Riders. When they were caught on the ship, he wanted to drown one of them. When he was fighting Astrid, he tried to dig an ax into her torso. He wasn't even loyal to other villains since he was constantly planning to betray them like with Alvin or the Grimborns. Villainous Dagur was threatening, unpredictable, and murderous. He was also a lot of fun, which made him my favorite baddie. Then, he pleasantly surprised me by turning good.

Dagur didn't have one of those moments where he tried to turn bad again. In all honesty, he couldn't. He'd done so many horrible things as a villain that if he ever did anything even remotely villainous again, no one would be able to forgive him. To put it into perspective, Dagur tried to sacrifice himself for everyone and STILL didn't gain all their trust. Generally, self sacrifice is kind of the most you can do, but since he didn't die, Heather was immediately suspicious of him again when she found him. It's because of everything he had done. So, to make up for how good of a villain he was, he had to be just as good a hero. Dagur became an incredibly selfless good guy.

Hiccup literally yelled that he hated him for leaving him with the Hunters (who technically had only captured the two of them because Hiccup tried to kill Dagur for supposedly poisoning Toothless) and Dagur was on his way to get Toothless to save him. When Dagur tried to sacrifice himself, he had to fight against Heather to do it. He isn't someone who needs someone to care about him back in order for him to protect them. Even in what he thought would be death, Dagur continued to try to help the Riders stop Viggo. Although the gold wasn't his, he still found it for Berk. Even though no one asked him to, he sent Berk willow bark when they didn't have any for medicine. On top of this, Dagur let Gustav (who is basically canonically hated by everyone) stay on Berserker Island at the request of Stoick. I'd say that after putting his life at risk and protecting the Riders, these other actions are necessary, but they show that the little details matter to him. I realize they matter to me too because they really showed me how much being a good person meant to Dagur. At every turn, he tried to do what he could to help his new friends. I truly respect that. He never half did anything. It makes sense. According to him, it's the Berserker way. All in, all the time. Sounds just like Dagur to me.

[tillwehavefaces]

I have literally never posted about Buddie before, but I want to add my two cents to the whole Buck/Tommy debate. I know there are mixed feelings and both sides have valid points, but to those who were expecting a Buddie kiss this soon - I don't get it?

Ever since I found out abc had picked up 911, I was and remain cautiously hopeful for Buddie endgame - in fact, the kiss makes me far more hopeful than I was a week ago. Because the truth is that if they'd gone straight for Buddie, it would have been bad storytelling. Offensively bad storytelling.

Hear me out. I agree with y'all that the storytelling that's happened up until now makes it clear that Buddie are in love with each other. I also happen to think that the storytelling that's happened up until now makes it clear that neither of these himbos have any clue that they're in love with each other, or that they even could fall in love with a man.

And it's not for lack of opportunity, if the writers had wanted to go that way, obviously! There's was Buck's reaction to Eddie being stuck in the well and Eddie making Buck Christopher's guardian in his will and both of them almost dying and Eddie having a literal breakdown over all the trauma he's repressed and they've both been to therapy and they've both broken up with women who were all wrong for them ... I could go on and on.

But not only did the writers not take any of these opportunities to make at least one of them realize their feelings for the other might not be platonic (certainly, no explicit indication on screen), but because fox was so afraid of losing viewers if they made both their supposedly straight male firefighters queer, they doubled down on Eddie and Buck seeing their relationship as platonic. Every time one of them went through some kind of life-changing experience and questioned deeply held beliefs about themselves yet never questioned their sexuality, it made it seem less and less likely that *anything* would make them realize they might be queer and in love with their best friend.

Honestly, I think if abc had gotten the show at a different point, they might have been able to go straight into Buddie. For example, a season earlier? Eddie's just gotten through a ton of trauma with the help of a therapist and is returning to the 118, and it would've been easy to write a storyline where he's realized his feelings for Buck and tries to do something about it. Or maybe right after Buck's near-death experience. But they both got through those traumas and started dating new women, as oblivious to the love right in front of them as ever. And that's how S6 ended.

So I don't think there's anything abc could have done to convince me that either one of them suddenly realizes how they feel without something happening. If that Buck/Tommy kiss had instead been a Buddie kiss, I would have loved it, but I wouldn't have really believed it. It wouldn't have felt genuine.

Excuse my nerdy science brain, but it's like inertia - Buck and Eddie have both been going in one direction for so long (the 'we're straight best friends!' direction) that it's going to take some kind of force to knock them off that path. It can't be near death experiences, cause they've both been there and it hasn't worked. It can't be finding new girlfriends or breaking up with said girlfriends. No, it's gotta be something really obvious.

That force is Tommy. A canon gay character who recognizes Buck as queer even when Buck doesn't recognize himself as queer. Who (unknowingly) forces Buck to confront that part of himself by kissing him, which will in turn force Eddie to confront his feelings and reaction to seeing his best friend and co-parent now dating a man. I can't say for sure that Buddie is coming, but I honestly think this (not Tommy specifically, but a queer man who is outside the whole Buddie situation) is the only way to tell this story in a way that makes it feel true to life, given the mess that fox created.

[albertonykus]

For the month of October, a comparison of different anime adaptations of the Doraemon chapter "Shizuka the Friendly Witch". I've already written a little about this chapter and its earliest adaptation from 1981, which adds many interesting details to the story.

What I haven't mentioned yet is how the episode shows a few more instances of Shizuka helping other people compared to the manga. Her methods of helping can come across as quite extreme here; for example, she saves Gian and Suneo from an angry dog by turning the dog into a puppy (and as far as we know, never undoes this). By the way, a commonality of anime adaptations of "Shizuka the Friendly Witch" to date is that they all add screentime for Gian and Suneo, who didn't appear in the manga version of the story.

Also in the 1981 adaptation, Shizuka stops a bank robbery by using the What-if Phone Booth to make money undesirable. (Nobita's Great Adventure into the Underworld would later establish that the What-if Phone Booth creates parallel universes that exist independently of the original, so it's questionable how practical a solution this would be.) The animation of Shizuka pulling out the phone booth is another case of this episode giving her a greater range of expressions than usual.

A new adaptation of "Shizuka the Friendly Witch" aired in 2005, making it one of the last episodes in the 1979 Doraemon anime. I previously posted some screenshots from this episode, but haven't discussed it in detail.

Out of the different versions of this story, Shizuka probably struggles the most in this one, mainly because it plays up the number of people she is prompted to help. This leads to her getting pulled away repeatedly before she can complete certain tasks. For example, she accidentally uses the wrong side of the Time Cloth on Suneo's broken bike, which causes it to deteriorate even more. However, she leaves without realizing her mistake, and as a result poor Suneo's bike never gets fixed.

The part where she has a hard time finding an appropriate gadget though is probably on Doraemon for not keeping his pocket organized.

The 2005 Doraemon anime reboot adapted "Shizuka the Friendly Witch" for the first time in 2007. This one is probably the most "by the book" adaptation of the bunch, but it is unique in that Shizuka asks Doraemon to give her a magical girl outfit, which she designed herself. She also insists on carrying a wand (similar to what I came up with for "Shizu-chan's Great Adventure into the Underworld"), as well as reciting an incantation every time she helps someone. It's fun to see her getting to be a dork, though the repetitive animation can be a bit of a drag.

The fourth and most recent adaptation of this story aired in 2017. I like Shizuka's purple dress in this version; there's an appropriately witchy vibe to it.

The most novel addition in this one is probably Shizuka's encounter with Gian and Suneo. The two of them are in trouble with their moms for playing pranks, and ask Shizuka for help. However, she tells Gian and Suneo that it is their own fault that they're in trouble, and refuses to aid them! It's a nice character moment for her, and is pretty funny. (And for those who might think she's treating them too harshly here, keep in mind what happens to her at the end of the story...)

In both adaptations from the 2005 series, Shizuka requests that others address her as "Majokko Shizu-chan" ("Little Witch Shizu-chan"). Even though Shizu-chan is her standard nickname in the manga, she is typically called Shizuka-chan in the anime, so this is an interesting nod to the source material.

Besides being thematically appropriate for this time of year, "Shizuka the Friendly Witch" is topical for a couple of other reasons. For one, the 2017 adaptation just aired as a rerun last weekend (Oct. 5, 2024). For another, it looks like we may be getting a reference to it in next year's Doraemon movie!

[onyxandemerald]

The Intro To The Intro to Spirit Work

I have some anecdotes and some advice. When I was a kid, I could not figure out for the life of me why this kept happening. If I was, for example, wrestling with a really stuck jar lid. I could be fighting with it, and fighting with it, trying all the tricks, cold water, tapping it on the counter -- anything. And then the moment I hit defeat, still arguing with the jar in my hands, I would waddle over to my mom and as it was in the process of coming out of my mouth; "Can you open this ja-"

The seal would break. Holding the jar in one hand and the lid in the other, my mom would just stare at me. And that was it and I'd be like oh okay sick, thanks, the universe? This was a regular occurrence for me. It came to the point where I started asking for help out loud even if no one was home to hear me, and usually it was well received.

This is how I have been working with spirits since I was like 10 years old. I genuinely believe it's this easy, and while proclivity naturally varies person to person, I do think this is something most people experience and just don't even realize. When spirit workers complain about how vague and subtle the spirit world can be, this is what we mean. Its like if you asked someone to interact with light. Light rays are just here! Sometimes you get a a glorious view of rays beaming through a part in the clouds on a gloomy day, but for the most part it's just here doing its thing not even taking mind in what I am doing.

Working with spirits is like asking a fish about water. Water is an integral facet of being a fish. A fish struggles to identify water because its all he knows! A fish knows nothing of land as he cannot survive there. Interacting with spirits is similar to feeling your emotions while also being aware of them. They're here all the time and most people do not even realize that it's spirits they are interacting with. This is the bright side, but this is also the bad news at the same time lol. It means that without a doubt, if you're considering working with spirits, its because a spirit asked you to and something in the spirit world wants your attention. Congratulations, you are already working with spirits.

The practice, now, becomes noticing and translating what spirits have to say to you. This is where most people take a wrong turn. This is not something you can force. Think of it as a bird friend. If you move too quickly or too abruptly, you'll scare her. If your emotional world is too tumultuous and you struggle to keep it still and gentle, it will interrupt your connection. Mindfulness, self-awareness, and meditation are the bread and butter of spirit work. If you are self-aware, you can discern, "is this message coming from inside the house? Is my empathy activating? Or is this something outside myself making itself known?" The better you understand your own inner workings, the easier it is to filter out that noise.

Sometimes its helpful to imagine a spirit as a virus in your prediction. Its probably not going to be malicious like a virus but bear with me. Due to previous experience, I had no expectation that an 8 year old would be able to open this jar, but when I reached out with my voice for assistance, it didn't even need to reach another alive person before that call was received. My entire childhood, every time this happened I would freeze in shock and awe. It was weird. According to what I know of physics, it seems unlikely that this would be the course of events. But something different happened that I was not able to anticipate.

I was on vacation with a friend and we were visiting a historical Civil War cemetery in Virginia. As is customary, I brought them to greet what I understood to be the eldest grave, one of a young Black girl born a slave during the very early 1800s. The grave marker was unique, as in it seemed haphazard and makeshift. As we were taking it in, my friend pulled out their phone to take a picture. Immediately something in me turned sour, and they couldn't see me how we were standing, but I kind of grimaced. I wasn't intending on stopping them, I was content with observing. Then I watched them start to put their phone down.

The feeling I had gotten, I can only describe as, seen. The thought came into my head that, "Wait a minute, did they hear me? Does she get it?" My grimace fell and I was left almost puzzled instead. I did not feel personally attached to this thought. It did not feel like it came from inside the house. It carried the same tone as if I was standing in line eavesdropping on the people around me. Their phone came back up and she took the picture and we left.

I am completely convinced that, while unconfirmed because I didn't have any tools with me, we heard to a spirit for sure, possibly the spirit of that little girl. I genuinely felt like I had overheard two people having a conversation.

"Can I take a picture?" "No! This is my home! Be respectful!" "Oh, okay sorry." "Wait you can hear me? Well I didn't know you were cool. Maybe in that case, its okay."

I spoke to my friend about this and they said when they took their phone out, they had felt something along the lines of, "Well maybe I don't have to take a photo of everything we come across," and that's when they lowered their camera. But then they said something changed. I felt a spirit changed their mind and gave them permission. This stands out to me because we both experienced it. We both felt that energy shift. I was not upset at my friend for taking a million pictures, even if I don't relate, so I don't feel this emotion was mine. I didn't feel my friend change their mind mid-thought because, well to be honest they don't do that lol. They are not exactly the mindful type, and they don't really love having original thoughts or using their intuition.

TLDR; This is the part that I am trying to drive home. When you're first beginning, its hard to notice spirits. And then there's the phase where everything feels like it could be a spirit or a sign. Which is entirely possible! But also not every spirit is trying to get your attention or has something to say to you just like not everybody at the grocery store is immediately your best friend. Sometimes you'll bump into a spirit just long enough for you both to diverge paths without even noticing. When you don't yet know what to look for, spirits sometimes can manifest similarly to your own emotions (I'm convinced that's because this is how we interact with our own spirits on the daily, but that's another post). A feeling. The difference to look out for is it's source. If you're feeling angry and upset or sad and hopeless seemingly out of nowhere with little to no prompting, consider if its a spirit. If you suddenly feel warm compassion lying motionlessly on your bed, consider if it's an ancestor's spirit touching you. If you violently get the urge to acquire a ukulele when you've never played an instrument before in your life, maybe that's Apollo reaching out to you. If the source is murky, dig deeper.

My other take away for you is to ask. Literally ask your question out loud. "Are there any spirits here? Who are you? What's your name? Do you have a message for me? Is this tarot card even or odd? Can I take a picture? Will you help me open this jar?"

[vivianquill]

Tango really needed to stop waking up in strange new places. At least he didn't seem to be beaten black and blue this time. Or maybe the jerks who'd kidnapped him weren't as rough as the pounding surf.

His head was still all fuzzy, but he wasn't dizzy or nauseous and he was lying on the floor of some sort of tidepool. Maybe? it wasn't sandy. And he was underwater. Probably. Tango couldn't help but let out a soft warble as he rubbed at his face, squinting up at the surface.

The water was deeper then where Impulse and Skizz and Zedaph had been keeping him, maybe two body-lengths deep, instead of only half of one. The ground sloped up off to the far end of the tidepool, with a shelf that made up a large part of the height. Tango twisted over to lay on his front for the time being, hopefully his dorsal fin hadn't gone to sleep.

There were other people, at the shallow end of the pool. He could see a-- a yellow and blue mer's tail, but only part of it. The angle was wrong, and they must've been sitting on the edge, like Tango often did when he would talk with his humans--

Impulse would be fine. Probably. Right? Impulse had to be fine, otherwise he was going to drown the humans who'd done that and taken him away and-- Well it wouldn't be pretty.

Tango couldn't see who the humans were-- that the yellow mer was talking to-- everything was too fuzzy around the edges still, and the distortion of the water just made them two blobs of color. Well, as long as they weren't going to be paying any attention to him, then he would simply curl up and--

They'd even changed the splint on his wrist. Why would they do that?? Tango huffed out a mouthful of bubbles, frustrated to no end but not really having the energy to get properly mad about it right now.

So instead he just curled up on his side, watching the yellow mer and the blobs above the water and wondering how long it would take them to realize that he was awake.

Turns out, Tango managed to doze off before they noticed that he'd woken up. He only knew this because he startled back awake when he felt movement in the water.

Well, it certainly burned away the last of the drowsy fog clinging to every bit of him.

And it certainly let the other mer know he was awake.

"Oh, hey--"

Tango jerked, twisting around to face the voice, almost toppling over. It was the mer he'd seen earlier, staring at him with bright blue eyes.

"I'm glad you're awake. How're you feeling?" The mer pushed off the shelf where he'd paused, drifting down to Tango.

"Who are you." Tango narrowed his eyes, coiling his tail underneath himself. It would probably be a bad idea to try and take them in an outright fight, but Tango was quick, and the tidepool here was much much larger than the other one. He'd be able to maneuver better.

"My name's Jimmy. It's-- uhm." Jimmy flicked his tail, settling on the tiles a little ways away from Tango, "There's probably been a misunderstanding, yeah? You're safe here, nobody's gonna hurt you. What's your name?"

Tango let out another mouthful of bubbles, "Did the humans steal you too? Where are we?"

"We're at a house, a safehouse-- the ocean is about fifty or so meters that-a-ways--" Jimmy pointed in what Tango assumed was the ocean, "I wasn't stolen-- well. I was stolen but that was like years and years and years ago, but no. The human here is nice, and so is Scott. They're my pod, they're here to help."

Tango blinked, a little put off by just how relaxed Jimmy was. He believed what he was saying, but that didn't mean Tango did.

It-- wasn't that Jimmy had a human in his pod, because admittedly, Tango had started to consider Impulse and Zedaph and Skizz a part of his pod, if only for the fact that they had been the only way for him to get food, and medicine, and companionship--

Well, now that he thought about it, considering those three as part of his pod probably wasn't a good thing. His pod would call him crazy, surely.

"You-- thought I was in danger. . . ?" Tango frowned, "With the other humans-- is that why yours stole me? They thought I was in danger?"

"You're hurt! And they were keeping you in such a small pool--" Jimmy was mirroring his frown now, "Didn't they take you from the sea in the first place?"

"No! No-- I mean, yes, they took me-- but there was a storm. I got separated from my pod and caught in a fishing net, and Impulse found me on the shore. I would have died if it wasn't for them!"

Jimmy let out a puff of bubbles, "They wouldn't have let you go. Humans don't let mer go."

"So you're here against your will too?"

"No!! No. If I wanted to I could leave. I can leave any time I want--"

"Then how do you know that my humans wouldn't have let me go?" Tango was posturing now, he knew that he was, all puffed up and fins out wide and Jimmy was reacting in kind, even if the other mer wasn't aware of it.

"Because they don't!! Look at you, you're practically all healed already and yet they still had you in that dumb little fishbowl."

"I'm not stupid. There's a reason i didn't tell them about my pod." Tango bared his fangs, trying to get Jimmy to back down, "They hadn't put me back yet because my wrist is still broken and a lone mer who can't hunt or defend themselves is a dead mer. They didn't want me to end up dead--!"

Jimmy threw up his hands in frustration, "Fine, whatever. You don't have to get so snippy about it. It doesn't matter anyway, it's not like you're going to ever see them again. We'll stick you back in the sea tomorrow and you'll never see any of us again if that's what you really want."

Jimmy's words hit Tango like a slap to the face. He turned away, pinning his frill back and ignoring Jimmy as the other mer swam back up to the shallow end of the pool.

Tango didn't move until the water had stilled again. But when he did, he couldn't see Jimmy anywhere. Even when he'd mustered up his courage to poke his head above the water, Jimmy wasn't to be seen. Had he dragged himself off somewhere? Tango didn't know, and he almost didn't care. He mostly didn't care.

They'd taken him from his humans, without asking if he was in danger or needed help! They'd maybe killed Impulse! And now he'd pissed off the first mer he'd seen in what felt like moons.

Great. Nice going Tango, your temper sure has come in handy once again.

[findafight]

I find Nancy and her relationships so interesting because I feel like the show makes everything way too simply mostly in favor for Nancy. Like the narrative automatically sides with her every time.

In s2, Jonathan shouldn't have encouraged her like that when she wanted to expose the lab. In s1, Jancy was on the same page, Jonathan wanted to find his brother, Nancy, her best friend, so they were working towards the same goal. In s2, Jon didn't have the desire to expose the lab. It's Nancy who is trapped in her guilt that turned into revenge that wanted to do something. Jon had positive experiences with the new lab and realistically wouldn't want to risk putting his mom and brother, who go there weekly, in danger. Especially after witnessing the whole problem, the gate and the vines spreading, he should have put a stop to it. Both didn't know about El being alive. The lab literally was the only thing that stood between the demise of Hawkins. They were the only people searching for a cure. Automatically, Jon should have pushed back bc Nancy wasn't thinking straight bc she was too wrapped up in her shit. Jonathan helping her accept Barb's death in a different way would have been more powerful and helpful bc Nancy still struggles with it after everything. Plus, I'm a believer that the lab would have searched her bag before, knowing she had plans to expose them.

I feel like when Nancy is in a relationship or even with friends, people always have to say yes to her with no pushback. If you push back, she just moves onto someone who will say yes. Robin was her yes man in s4 Jon in s2. In s3, he pushed back the slightest, and you see the conflict that came from it (financial struggles) was never truly resolved from Nancy's part. It carried over to s4 where Jon is afraid to tell her truth that he can't afford to go to college with her. Now, the show treats Jonathan as the villain for this without asking what caused him to lie to Nancy in the first place. It's also because the narrative lets Nancy be right. I think Steve was the only person in s4 who was a bit apprehensive with the plan, and yet this is treated as something bad, or he doesn't know what he is talking about. Or within the fandom people use his different opinion as proof he doesn't get Nancy, and look at Robin who just goes along and understands she's the best suited partner for her.

I feel like Nancy doesn't grow much personally throughout the series because she never gets truly challenged. And if she does, it's resolved in a way to her favor. Like, I think she needs someone who isn't a doormat who challenges her in a way that makes her realize she has to change her behavior in certain situations. I will forever mourn the plot s4 could have gotten if they made Robin into the person who would challenge Nancy. Both girls are smart. If Robin was the driving force in the investigation god, that would already set Nancy off.

oh yeah, the show sort of hands Nancy relationships on a silver platter and we never see her actually put in effort towards them? and this prohibits Nancy from growing more than she could! It doesn't let Nancy be wrong let alone admit she's wrong. We see Mike apologize to Will, and Steve apologize to Dustin, we see Robin and Steve have back and forth and Steve trying to get robin a gf, and we see El and Max spend time together talking and getting to know each other. we see them interacting in a way that we see there is a push and pull.

But we see Nancy and Jonathan fall into bed together, Jonathan supporting Nancy's (ill-advised, even if the show won't admit it because that would mean saying Steve was right) plan to expose the lab. I think your point about Jonathan not having a reason to do that is super interesting because you're right! we know the lab is sketchy as hell, but to Jonathan they're the reason Will went missing, but also the reason they got him back. Will's been getting treatment or tests done there for nearly a year by that point, and while Jon may be distrustful of the Lab, wanting to take away the only official support his family has for what they went through doesn't make sense. What were they expecting to happen to the MASSIVE ALTERNATE DIMENSION GATE if the lab shut down? (why did owens show them lmao. why weren't they searched?) it makes no sense and just reinforces the idea that Steve had a point. I think if they had been able to have the library conversation not in public, then maybe he could have worked something out to help Nancy but alas. They didn't and people just point ot it as Steve dismissing Nancy and pretending everything is fine (when Nancy was also doing that!!)

When Jonathan does resist Nancy's idea (which isn't even UD related she just wanted to prove herself to misogynistic jerks) because financially his family needs him to have a job, and him having a job working in a field he likes and enjoys is a best case for him to get better work out of hawkinis/into uni, and honestly Jon had a sweet gig because he didn't mind the work, it was good job experience, and it would look good on a college application.

While Nancy is right that they shouldn't treat her with mockery, I can't help but think it's...incredibly naive of her? She was an intern. She wasn't going to get anything other than interviewing people for fluff pieces if she got anything other than typing/gofering to begin with. It's frustrating because living in a sexist world you do have to pick your battles. She has no power there, because she's an intern and replaceable and a teenager. It's just not realistic to me that she would think she would get anywhere or get away with trying to follow the rabies rat lead. (which is also...a boring story like oooh rat rabies? in a town where whole fields of pumpkins rotted on the vine? Very much an excuse to inset Jonathan and Nancy into the plot [season 3 is a mess and the best thing from it is robin and scoops troop which tbh makes up for it imo]) Like she could be mad and frustrated and insulted and humiliated, let her rant about that!! about her powerlessness! That's interesting and heartbreaking because there really isn't anything to do but quit then. but idk what she thought she was going into in a male dominated field in her podunk town. Not blaming her just think that writing decision should have been thought through more.

Her fight with Jonathan actually kinda made me think jancy was interesting for a second because yes!! those are real conflicting issues and priorities!! That's relationship conflict that's real and natural for the characters to have! and misunderstanding!! and then Nancy's mom (ew) gives her a speech when it's like bro. you're owed an apology but you also owe Jonathan one if you want to repair and strengthen your relationship. So she never apologizes and jon gives a half-assed apology and then they never have to talk about it again because the UD is here and that's more important!! It's another place where Nancy's development stalled and it's frustrating because it also makes Jonathan more of a doormat (sorry Jon you've been done so dirty)

their s4 conflict is so stupid to me. It goes both ways like damn Nancy if you missed your boyfriend whose family is notoriously broke maybe you should go visit him? or talk to him? It's an issue for both of them (I think it's really weird that people bring up steve's RV dream and wanting Nancy beside him to shit on Stancy but barely bring up the fact that Jonathan [admittedly in a catastrophizing spiral, but one might also think Steve, having been half eaten and going into a situation that could kill him, was also not in his most steady of mind] assumed Nancy would drop everything to be with him in California (after saying she's incredibly ambitious) and they'd have kids etc? idk it's just that both mentioned kids but only Steve mentioned his own experience with taking care of kids, wheras Jon is using that as part of his excuse for lying to her...) Jonathan lying is obviously a problem. He's "slow-mo breaking up with Nancy" and that's an issue he's got, but we only see Nancy stressed about it but also not...really do anything about it? idk we don't get to see her fight for her relationship with a boy she supposedly loves! Why not? Why can't we see Nancy's stubbornness and pride and ambition turned in the direction of saving her relationship with Jonathan? Instead of him just coming back to Hawkins and them still being a bit awkward around each other, him lying, her having been flirting with Steve for a week. Like. Why didn't we see her pull him aside and go "okay I love you. We're obviously having issues and it's absolutely not the best time but I can't take not talking to you and feeling like we're drifting!"

With the whole plan at the end of s4...yeah. The narrative/show can't let Nancy be wrong and/or Steve be right. It also needed a plan that would fail. So we get Steve pushing against the plan, treated like he's being irrational for it, and then it failing. As for Nancy needing to be challenged...I mean yeah? but also I think a key part of what she wants from romo relationships is to not be challenged! She doesn't like when her boyfriends push back against her ideas/plans, and ignores them anyways. Which is why it's so frustrating that there have been opportunities for the writers to let Nancy be wrong and learn and grow and they just...don't. They validate her decisions even if they make no sense.

And the thing is...Robin is Thee driving force in their investigation. she gets it right again and again and is the reason the connection to music is even made, But for some reason I feel like the show treats it as another Nancy Investigation Success instead of Nancy being the one that was just kinda there and also a bit mean to robin for no reason other than jealousy. The opportunity for Robin to be a challenge to Nancy's authority was there! It was there and all they would've had to do was have Robin not suck up to Nancy, have the show/narrative acknowledge it was Robin who was the reason the got any information beyond the name Victor Creel, and have Nancy realize that she isn't infallible and right all the time. It would have been so good to see her take stock and reconsider herself and her decisions and her relationships and want to make a friendship with Robin, who wouldn't be co-operative.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi sex witch! I could use some advice about how to approach having sex for the first time.

I’m in my mid 20s (lesbian) and I’ve been in 3 relationships, but none of them lasted very long and I didn’t have sex with any of my partners (or the few people between them, who I’ve mostly intensely made out with). I’ve realized that I have issues around romantic relationships specifically and commitment, and done a lot of reflection so I know where those issues are stemming from but not how to deal with them. One day I do want to take the time to work through it, but for the moment I’ve decided I don’t have the capacity to prioritize that and don’t want a serious relationship in the near future anyway.

However, I really want to have casual sex. Through some past experiences I’ve realized that my relationship hang ups are purely emotional and frankly I’m horny, I just want to get laid (preferably by someone I barely know). It’s genuinely not a big deal to me emotionally that it’ll be my “first time” (past some embarrassment that it’s taken me so long, though I hate feeling it and I know there’s no “correct” age here), but I feel like I’d have some responsibility to let the other person know? And I’m worried that it will be a big deal for the other person or it’ll change things for them, because there’s this culture around virginity. I guess I don’t owe anyone that info, but when I think about not disclosing it I feel bad that I might be terrible due to inexperience, or have to admit during sex that I don’t really know what I’m doing, and then have to justify why I didn’t tell them. Basically I just don’t know how to navigate my first time considering all of this, I know this isn’t about the physical side of things but any advice you have would be greatly appreciated!!

hi anon,

listen: you're overthinking this. generally when embarking on a new activity for the first time, you're going to have the best experience if you just tell your partner(s) up front that you haven't done this before. that doesn't create a better or worse experience, but it is a different one that not everyone is up for. that doesn't mean you're wrong for not having sexual experience or that they're wrong for not wanting to have sex with you; it just means you're incompatible.

look, it's like d&d, okay? personally I LOVE running games with new players, because getting to help them build their first character and walk them through the rules and watch them gain enough confidence to take big roleplaying swings and get really strategic during battle is really satisfying for me. but not every DM wants to do that; not everyone has the patience or inclination to show other people the ropes, and they'd just prefer everyone knows roughly how the game works upon arrival so they can get right to it. this is actually a great metaphor because even experienced DMs and players who have been sharing a table for years still need to actually talk to each other and come to agreements about their players and the rules and, like, what Mage Hand can get away with, but it's a different kind of communication than you'd have with someone who's still learning which dice do what.

if you don't like dungeons and dragons and this metaphor sucked for you, here's a slightly more universal one about visiting a museum for the first time.

anyway, the point is that I'm an advocate of sharing information, not because you have some kind of moral duty to out yourself as a virgin, as if that's a weird and bad thing to be, but because I think sharing relevant info makes for better sex and sexual history is part of that info. it doesn't reflect poorly on you in any capacity, any more than someone having a large number of sexual partners would. it's just one more thing to talk through with your potential future sexual partner(s) as you figure out exactly how you want to have fun together.

[radios-arcade]

HELLO I AM. POSITIVELY OBSESSED W YOUR SPIDER KING SHDJAHJDHD I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABT HIM!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOODNESS I WOULD LOVE TO TELL YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM EXCUSE ME WHILE I RANT Origins: Okay so obviously his name is technoblade. He lives in an alternate dimension that never quite got out of the medieval era. And at the beginning of the story he's kind of just a guy trying to make ends meet and farm his potatoes, but their kingdom is under tyrannical rule so its not exactly the easiest. They get mega taxed, people are getting wrongfully thrown in jail and executedd, people's houses are routinely searched and looted, and every day more and more land is being taken form the people that live on it. A lot of the time to make ends meet Techno steals and pickpockets, sneaking into richer areas of the kingdom and breaking into houses there during the night for anything valuable or any interesting bits and bobs for his friend/roommate. Techno lives with his best friend Phil, who's a really incredible inventor, and who recently has been working on trying to figure out the power of flight. So think Da Vinci-esque wing backpack kind of vibes.

And Phil is getting really really close to actually getting it to work, when the king's men bust in to do a 'routine check' and loot the house. So of course they find the wings, and of course they yoink them for the king. They also destroy the blueprints while they're at it, because anything that belongs to the king cannot belong to anyone else. Phil is devastated, rightfully so. That was basically his life's work, all of the parts took ages for Techno to grab, and its basically irreplaceable work. Techno decides he's had enough, and he breaks into the castle to get those wings back for Phil. Techno's honestly pretty good at breaking into places at this point, so he gets all the way to the king's vault without getting caught. As soon as he steps in he realizes that this is where all of the villages stuff is that the king's men have stolen and looted and robbed in the past, and he realizes he can't just leave it all behind. SO he throws the wings on his back and starts shoveling all of the goods and riches into his bag, throwing jewelry over his neck and onto his wrists, just absolutely everything he can carry. One such thing he takes is a golden spider totem he throws around his neck.

He's able to escape back out unscathed, but not without guard notice. He gets back to the village and starts returning all of the goods and riches and keepsakes that the king stole back to the village people. Phil is absolutely ecstatic to have his wings back, but he's also worried because its not like the king wont notice that all of this stuff is missing. Techno's passed out everything except one, the spider totem still around his neck. But if won't come off, like the spider totem's legs have physically buried into his skin. And while he's trying to get this off the soldiers ride into town. The totem isn't something he can hide, so the soldiers surround and overwhelm him, arresting him along with Phil as the main operators. Techno had obviously been a pretty big pain in not only the king's side, but most of the upper class's, and this seems to have been the last straw, so he's set for execution. They decide to kill him with the last remaining necklace on, as an example of what happens to those that take from the king. He's set under a sword to be killed, and while the king starts his speech about all of Techno's wrongs, Techno has a vision. He's visited by the blood god(specifically the god of spilled blood, blood for new life, and harvested blood) which in this is kind of a giant spider god (think kind of spiderman noir vibes ig?) The god says that the totem chose Techno, that it gave him a chance, and that if he wanted to live the god could help him. On one condition. Techno becomes the blood god's warrior and patron and carries on its message and word. Techno agrees just as the sword closes in on his neck. And Techno does die. But someone else lives. The spider totem fills his veins, mends his neck, and lifts him up onto his feet. The last remnant of it being a small emerald still embedded in his chest.

The rest of the spider totem had exploded outwards and wrapped around Techno, which is how his costume forms. Techno breaks free from the chopping block, grabs the sword from the executioner, and kills not only the executioner but the king and his soldiers. Once he decapitates the king just as the king did to Techno, he takes the crown and cloak from the body as a token and warning to any other monarchs he comes across. He and Phil, now with not only purpose but power to impose that purpose, travel to other kingdoms to take down the tyrannical monarchies that take root and set people free. He is called Spider-King by most, due to the cloak and crown he'll don from time to time, and Phil is dubbed the Vulture for the wings he flies on and how wherever he goes you know death is sure to be. They defend all they can from tyrants and corrupt monarchs, and at the end of the day they always return to their village, to home. Powers babeyy: -Spiderwebs! His spiderwebs are actually blood that he is able to thwip out from his wrist that solidify into golden spider thread as it travels outwards and connects with its target. -Supa Strength. He was already a piglin hybrid, which means mans was already pretty buff, so now he's even stronger. Lets just say it took some getting used to. -Can stick to walls. Makes it easy to sneak into places, thats for sure. -Blood God's Whisper. Think of Spidey Sense, that's what it is. HOWEVER it also entails the actual god constantly whispering in Techno's mind trying to get him to do things, in an almost constant stream

Fun Facts: -Technoblade hates the name Spider-King. He is the killer of kings. He prefers the name the Anarchist, although that eventually mutates into the Arachnist through the grapevine combined with his funky spider powers. -Many people think that Techno Blade was fully killed that day, adnt hat the Arachnist was actually an avenger of his death -he farms potatoes, we love to see it. Best in the kingdom babey -He uses his costume as a scarecrow when he's not out vigilante-ing about with Phil -The emerald remnant from the totem is permanently embedded in his skin, so he just connected a gold chain to it so people will think its a necklace. He taps it twice to activate the uniform and twice again to deactivate it bonus doodle because im eepy: