#every time i hear the alex jones bit

[summertimesadnessirl]

Lestat is the frog they put chemicals in the water to make gay.

Lestat first victim of biphobia

[12-seconds-to-live]

(Un)Lost: The art of war

Pairing: F12022/3!Grid! x Fem!Driver!Oc

Warnings: DNF’s, angst, a little bit of love, episodes of anxiety, Seb’s retirement, harsh words.

DRIVE TO SURVIVE SEASON 5 - EP. 1  THE NEW ERA

“It’s freezing in here” I said while I was puting my cap in my head, my Williams cap, ready to sit in the famous black chair of Netflix. “Thank you Netflix for make this possible, Bahrain is being cooking itself now” The producer chuckle.

“So, we’re going to let you introduce you and then make you a few questions. Everything clear?”

“Sure” I look for a better position in the chair and look to the camera “My name is Charlotte Robyn-Jones and I’m engineer strategist for Williams Racing Formula One Team” I said with a smile on my face. I saw the people in the back laugh and I copy the action

“You can’t lie to Netflix, kid”

“I think I just did ... Anyway, 1, 2, 3, Monday to Friday, My name is Charlotte Robyn-Jones, I’m 23 and I’m a race driver for Williams Racing Formula One Team” I tilt my head to one side and laugh “Cool”

“So cool. What’s for you to be at the top of the game right now?, obviously avoiding the question that you must  be bored about” 

“Being a woman is fantastic, except for that thing every month but I can’t complain. I have to say that it’s not easy. You can dream of some things happening but all the same time, If you really wanted, the answer is get up and look for your better options to make things happen.” I gassped and look down and to the camera. “I remenber when I told my dad that I wanted to give it a try in karting and I wasn’t even 6, he looked at me like  I was some sort of silly muppet but then he make me promise that I will do great in school and then he will help me with the racing carreer I wanted. The rest is history”

A series of videos of her carreer show up, from her beginning in karts, F4, F3 and her successfull 2021 in F2 finishing as champion, smiling faces all around and obviously a very proud Charlotte.

“You just mention your dad. What about other members in your family? Friends or even a boyfriend?” I look at the producer with a side smile

“You guys are really something else, right?” they laugh “I’m single ready to mingle. I don’t talk to much about my family, I like to be private about that. I almost dropped all this. My family is my priority and two years ago I lost my mom due cancer so...”

“I’m sorry we don’t...”

“No, it’s okay” I smiled to the camera “She’s not here but I still talk about her like she’s just in the back of the house screaming to the dog for being so silly, she’s still here and I know she’s proud” 

“Sure she is. Just to finish ... Any expectations for your team. Everybody wanted to see you in a bigger team like Mercedes or Ferrari, did you hear any rumors about that?”

“Well, certanly I did hear, but the thing is, mmm, I always believe that If you wanna prove yourself is better to start from the very bottom, understand the little things and then you’ll find success, almost glory. Being in this sport is so tricky, like, one day you won in Monaco and the next day you’re out of the points or feeling that all your pasion is going out to your body” I see everybody’s faces like I was saying something fascinating “This is sport is like war, you better watch out your back ‘cause even your own team could kill you.”

“So, this is your year to discover yourself?”

“Yes, my bingo card this year will imply me being playing the art of war that is F1″

“Okay Charlotte, this is all for today. We’ll see you along the year”

“Thanks and don’t spill my secrets. Snitches end up in ditches, they say” 

I go out of the room straight to the Williams garage. Sure thing is that this year is going to be wild, after what happened last year between Red Bull and Mercedes, man, I really don’t want to be any member of those teams.

“Hello Ms. Jones, everything all right with Netflix?” My PR, Ava asked. She was in Alex side of the garage talking to other people

“Yeah, they’re like school girls” She laugh

“Yeah, sometimes. Today is media day so since you’re ready with your Williams merch, we can start signing some caps and cards and then continue with your schedule. Or do you want to start with press?”

“Up to you really, better doing the easiest first then I’ll face the sharks” We walk to a conference room when I found Alex with his girlfriend and his PR. Last year I met the girl in a tournament in the UK and we have been really close since then.

“Oh hello you, my girl and my boy rocking together this year” Lily said and hug me, while Alex put a false angry face

“Nice to see you Lily and yes, we’re going to rock or better than that” I said she smack Alex shoulder

“See, I tould you she has spirit!”

“I know, I think that everybody saw that video of her running along the track after her win in last year championship”

That video.

Well, you don’t win F2 championship many times in your life, right?

“I don’t know what are you talking about”

“Everybody know you do”

“Shh” I sit next to the pile of merch with my face on it. It’s 9:45 so I have time ‘till lunch and more interviews.

INTERVIEW ROOM @14:20

W/ Lando Norris, Carlos Sainz, Lewis Hamilton and Sebastian Vettel

“Don’t be nervous, ok? I’m not gonna tell what to answer, you’re smart so answer like a pro”

“Like a pro? So I can say <<inchident>> or even ask about the interviewers plans for the summer?” I showed Ava a side smiled

“Please don’t and you’re going to be in between, your name is on the sofa” I enter the room and saw the amount of people organized in the back of the room with notepads, cameras and tricky looks.

“So, welcome everybody to the second session here in Bahrain, we are here with Lando Norris from McLaren, Carlos Sainz from Ferrari, Charlotte Jones from Williams, Lewis Hamilton from Mercedes and Sebastian Vettel from Aston Martin. Welcome to the drivers, we’re going to have a round of questions for this sesion, if that’s ok” I look at the others who nod.

“Hello, this question is for Charlotte” Great. “We want to hear your first impresions of your new team, if you have the chance to meet the other drivers and expectations for your rookie season”

I tried to smiled but I suddenly felt like I wanna dissapear and the lights we’re too bright so I put on my glasses and I hear Lewis laugh and how he copy my action and take the microphone “It’s sunny outside so there’s no need to put the  light to bright, thanks guys” And squeezed my hand.

“Yeah, lights, mmm, almost everybody saw me in the car last year when I met the team and my teammate. Everything has been great so far, mmm I spent half of the holidays with the Sainz family, there been close to my mom’s family so, yeah, Carlos and his trainer just help me to get in better shape for this rodeo, something that I’m grateful for” I fist bump with Carlos and laugh “And expectations, well, I prefer to see how it goes after the race, I sent my ideas and questions the past month so I know now that the car is fast and let’s see If we can put Williams on the top again”

Sebastian took the microphone and look at me “Do you know about engineering?”

“Yeah, I finished my degree in mechanical engineering last month, obviously online, so...”

“That’s impresive, kid” answer Sebastian

“Am I the only one scared now?” Ask Lando to everybody. Everybody laugh at that. The interview session went smoothly and not many questions were to me, since Lewis was in the room, the events of november where reminded. Questions about strategies and upgrades for Ferrari and Aston Martin and the chances of McLaren of getting a podium this year. After that, the session ended, Carlos stopped me.

“Welcome officially, girasol” He hug me in the process and we heard a cough

“Are you good, man?” 

“Since my friend here it’s so disrespectfull, nice to meet you, yo soy Lago” 

“Nunca le enseñaste bien español” I said laughing to the spaniard

“Ciertamente él fue un terrible alumno”

“Please don’t. Back to a common language” I smiled to him and oh boy! such beautiful eyes

“Charlotte, rookie, friend of this guy, fan of dogs, chocolate cake and be on my xbox the whole day” I shake his hand and he gasp

“Marry me”

“In a few years, maybe” I look to Carlos who look at me with wide eyes

“I don’t want him on family holidays, ten moths are too much now” As we were walking through the paddock, a few photographers and fans aproach us. Since Carlando were more famous that I am, so I go straight to my motorhome to lay down for a bit.

What a day.

A few headers on instagram and twitter about the conference

2022 ROOKIE READY TO DRIVE AND BEING A THREAT

CHARLOTTE ROBYN-JONES, NEW SENSATION IN THE PADDOCK

IS THIS THE YEAR OF WILLIAMS?

Mind clear and then start proving myself.

I’m a girl, yes, but right now I feel that I have a chance to be like them, it’s ny time.

A champion, one ready to fight.

I finished my day with more media duties, to 6 pm I was going to wait for Carlos who offer a ride to the hotel. While I was waiting in the parking lot, the papaya pair waved at me.

“Hiya, you must me Charlotte. I’m Daniel, the one with good looks in the team” He said with a smile.

“Nice to meet you Daniel, how you guys doin’?”

“All good, we’re heading to the hotel, ready to kick asses tomorrow?” I saw how Lando seems certanly interested in the question

“I’m feeling normal, but yeah, let’s see tomorrow. My driver arrived so... see ya” I waved at them when Carlos opened his car. Daniel and Lando saw the couple leaving the parking lot when the australian looks at the youngest

“Say it”

“What?” 

“Why do you look so shock around her? I mean, even Max who lives in a rock knew about her”

“I’ve been friends of Carlos and I never see her around, it’s weird”

“Ooow, the kid is jealous of the newie” Daniel started laughing and going to his car

“Man stop... I’m not jealous and also I’m a man!”

BAHREIN CIRCUIT @13:45 - FP1 & FP2

“Radio check, please” my race engineer said. Williams had the chance to start fourth in the two practices after Alfa Romeo, Ferrari, Red Bull and Alpine.

“ And I thought my heart was detached, from all the sunlight of our past, but she's so sweet, she's so pretty, does she mean you forgot about me? Yeah, yes, I’m going to send you my playlist for the race, what dou you think?” 

“We’ll  evaluate that after practice”

“It’s not a no, I wil take it”

“Ok Charlotte, 30 seconds to start heating the tyres and whenever you ready, your flying lap”

“Copy”

“Now, we’ll have Williams coming out the pits to start practice, first our rookie Charlotte, fresh out the oven as F2 champion. She’s heating the tyres and has 15 minutes to do a few laps and see how that car goes”

On the broadcast, the faces of the team principals were on screen, with their expectations on the girl and see how she start.

“Ok Charlotte, you can start in the next lap with Leclerc and Ocon in front of you” I pressed the copy bottom. Here I go.

One thing about me it’s that I brake late but my left foot likes to keep itself on the throttle. A girl have to give it all, right?

“I feel like I’m watching the Mercedes W11 all over again. Wow! I can see a future world champion, multiple times If she wanted too”

“That car is fast” said Christian Horner looking to Max’s engineer “What the hell?” 

“Definitely it is” 

“Toto, even when she brake the car doesn’t go below 170 km/h. what?” Lewis and Bono stand beside the team principal of Mercedes.

“I think that your eight championship have to wait a bit, I can’t believe my eyes”

“That girl is the real Toretto, don´t you think?” asked Yuki to the french man

“I wanna throw myself down a hill to be honest” 

“What the f***?, which car is that?, I almost get dizzy” asked Charles over the radio

“That was a Williams, the rookie, she’s 3 seconds faster than you”

“This is going to be a long season. F***”

“Well done Charlotte. With his pace you can certanly win every race this season”

“Haha, good job to everybody from those in the factory to the ones in the garage. What about Alex?”

“As good as you, the difference is 0.337″

“That’s good”

“Yes, we’ll wait for you in the garage”

As I parked, I could heard the applauses from my team and the people around the garage. 

And yes.

A very long season ahead.

--

intro

That was fun. 

For those who doesn’t speak spanish, here the translation:

Girasol: sunflower.

Nunca le enseñaste bien español: you never taught him Spanish well.

Ciertamente él fue un terrible alumno: He certainly was a terrible student.

Hope you liked it :)

[christinescupofcoffee]

dead man walking

chapter seventeen: walking in l.a.

Krista fetched up a sigh. It had been a whole month since Alex had left for California and she hadn’t heard a word back from him as of yet. She hoped that he had kept his promise and would seek out a phone just to call her. Perhaps he forgot, or there was no phone out there. But then again, he had stayed with his parents for a little while: surely, they had one with them. 

In the meantime, Mrs. Jones visited the house every now and again to check on her while she was by herself and growing a baby inside of her. She was starting to show as well, having gone from a small bump on her waist to a fuller one. And at that point, she could have the ultrasound rested on her for a better look. The doctor was confident that it was a girl, but she made no promises. 

But Mrs. Jones showed her delight regardless of uncertainty. Even from behind those blinded eyes, Krista could make out the joy within them. 

“That’s wonderful, Miss Belladonna! I have faith that she’ll be everything that you need right now.” 

But then again, Krista had her fears, especially since she was alone now, and the money she had saved from her stints on the runway were beginning to dwindle down. She thought of calling up Alex but she had not remembered if he had given her his phone number or not. She missed hearing his big voice and she missed his friendly presence. He was a fella, a boy at heart, and a young man who tried his best: she had to go easy on him during this time.  

Mrs. Jones leaned back in the chair and brought her cane closer to her, but she never said anything further. 

Krista lowered her gaze to her chest: with the morning sickness having gone, she now dealt with the pain of swollen breasts and soreness in her lower back; every now and again, she raised her arm over the crown of her head to ease the feeling her back. It was only going to get harder with time, especially since it was the beginning of January and the start of the brand-new year. The help of a blind woman could only do so much for her as well. 

The phone rang and she hurried into the kitchen: the little strip on the back showed her an unfamiliar number, but she picked it up anyway. 

“Hello?” 

“Krista?” She recognized his big voice, even if he kept it down low. 

“Alex! Oh my god, I feel like I haven’t heard your voice in a million years. How are you?” 

“Oh, man. First off, forgive me for not calling you sooner. I landed in San Francisco, and I went to my parents’ house just to see them, right? Well, before I could get to the phone to call you, my mom pulls me aside and she sits me down and gives me breakfast. They were both worried sick about me because I had gone to New York and didn’t really tell them why, either. I explained it to them and then I just kinda inadvertently—forgot. I got distracted and then at that point, I went to bed for a few hours and then first thing in the morning, I had to leave for the train ride down to L.A. Because of the fog out here, there was a bit of a delay and so I got there at exactly five minutes before the session started.” 

“Oh, wow.” 

“Yeah. I was freaking out, too, but they were all cool and their manager Frank assured me that everything was alright. We got started, spent all day long jamming—those guys rock, Krista! You wouldn’t think a little alt rock band from Jersey would have such a strong and hard groove, but they do! I treated them to a couple of solos, and they were like, ‘yeah, that’s awesome, dude!’” 

“And?” she asked him with both hands pressed to the phone. “What’s the news?” 

“Well, I didn’t get the part,” Alex continued with a sigh. 

“Aw, that’s too bad. I was really hoping you would.” 

“I was, too! Especially since Testament are—not in a good place right now. Afterwards, Frank and I were talking, and he said Louie—Louie Clemente, left about a month after I did. Almost like clockwork, he saw me leave and then he just boogied.” 

“Really?” 

“Yeah. Apparently, he and Chuck were butting heads with each other a lot when I wasn’t looking, so he just needed to find that opening and that extra bit of confidence. That's all speculation, I don’t know the full story but that’s what happened. The label’s thinking of dropping them, too, unless they can follow up nicely to the last album with me,  The Ritual .” 

“I hope they can reconcile because... you know.” 

“Oh, absolutely. Lou doesn’t really have—any issue like that. But it’s still possible. Whatever got Joey could very easily get him, or even me for that matter. I just gotta do what I can with what I’ve got.” 

She pursed her lips at the sound of that. She didn’t want to think of Alex going the same way as Joey did, but the possibility hung over her head, nonetheless. He then cleared his throat. 

“So, what’s going on with you?” he asked her in a gentle voice. “How are you feeling?” 

“I’m doing okay,” she assured him, “I’m getting a little bigger with every week. I'm starting to feel more sore than usual.” The smell of turpentine caressed her nose right then, but then it disappeared as quickly as it came to her. “I also got an ultrasound the other day. Doctor thinks it might be a—” She cleared her throat. “—a little girl.” 

“A girl?” Alex asked her, stunned. “You’re having a girl?” 

“According to her, yes,” she said with a little smile on her face. “But it’s a relatively new technology so—no promises, but still. Joey and I might be having a daughter.” 

“Well, that’s great, Krista! I hope I'm not doing anything this summer because I really want to be there for you.” 

“That is so sweet of you, Alex.” 

“Doing what I can,” he said: there was a loud crash behind him, such that it took her aback. 

“Is everything okay?” she asked him, concerned. 

“Yeah. I’m in a coffee shop in Paramount, literally around the corner from the park and the freeway so I might have a cup and then I’ll take a walk in a little bit. I've just been hanging out here in California, in the Bay Area and I’m back in L.A. now. Frank got me another lead to a new-ish band nearby here—well, they’re not very new, they’ve been around since the late Seventies, but they’re definitely new to me.” 

“Oh?” She raised her eyebrows at that. 

“Yeah, they’re called—Savatage, I think is what he said? Sounds like ‘sabotage’ but it’s not. So, the very second that I get off the phone with you here, I’m going to give them a little ring. Based out of Florida and they came out here for a bit more exposure. He told me they're a little more along the lines of harder rock and so they’re looking for a guitar player like me.” 

“I hope you get it, Alex, that would be incredible.” 

“Krista?” Mrs. Jones called from the front room. 

“I’ll be there in a minute!” she called back. 

“Who’s that?” Alex asked her. 

“That’s Mrs. Virginia Jones,” she replied. 

“Ah, the infamous Mrs. Jones,” he proclaimed. “I have to see her.” 

“Yeah, she wants to meet you. She won’t be able see you but she’ll know that it’s you, though.” She caught a whiff of turpentine once again, and then it went away again. For a second, she swore that the whole thing came from the cocktail of her imagination and hormones, but then she caught Mrs. Jones muttering about it to herself.  

“When do you plan on coming back to New York?” she asked him. “Besides, this summer, of course.” 

“Whenever I can. Hopefully before then. Krista, I will hitchhike back if I have to.” 

She giggled at that and then Mrs. Jones muttered something else again. 

“Anyways, I have to go,” she told him. 

“Yeah, I do, too. There's now a line behind me and I gotta get a hold of Savatage.” 

“Okay. And, Alex?” 

“Yeah?” 

She nibbled on her bottom lip. “I love you.” 

Silence except for the soft chatter behind him. “Well, I—I love you, too,” he said in a low voice. 

“I’ll talk to you soon,” she told him, and they hung up at the same time. Krista then returned to the front room to find Mrs. Jones with a repulsed expression on her face, complete with a wrinkle to her nose. 

“Do you smell that?” she asked her in one fell swoop. 

“I do, yeah. Where is that coming from?” 

“I wish I knew. It's rather strong this time, too. I'm catching like little whiffs of it every now and again.” 

“Who called, by the way?” 

“That boy Alex,” Krista replied. 

“Ah, dearest Alex! How is he doing?” 

“He’s—doing as best as he absolutely can at the moment.” 

“Fantastic! I hope you and I get to experience him together in the future.” 

“Well, I smell it especially in the kitchen.” 

“Is there anything underneath the kitchen? I can’t remember.” 

“The water heater is right underneath the sink and the dishwasher. Right beneath where you’re sitting at is the furnace. The rest of it is the basement.” 

“Where’s the door to the basement?” 

“Well, there’s two doors. There's the one right across the hall from the guest room and there’s one out in the garage.” 

Mrs. Jones rose to her feet and, with the tip of the cane out before her, she walked towards Krista with a look of determination on her face. The blackened lenses of her glasses gleamed under the daylight which filtered through the windows. Krista stepped out of the way for her, and she tapped the cane against the rim of the doorway. 

“Which way?” she asked aloud. 

“Right.” 

Another tap on the floor and Mrs. Jones turned to the right. She pressed her hand to the door panel for the knob: when she touched it, she turned it and let the door swing open. Krista lingered right behind her, and the foul smell of turpentine flooded out into the hallway: just like the bottle of it back at the gallery in England. 

“Jesus,” Krista muttered, and she brought a hand to her nose. 

“Oh, yeah, that’s rank,” Mrs. Jones noted with a shake of her head. “Stay back. You're pregnant, I don’t want you getting exposed to this.” 

“Mrs. Jones, you can’t see, though,” she pointed out. 

“I know, it’s just—a matter of finding out where that smell was coming from.” 

“Right, right.” Mrs. Jones then reached out for the door, but she swatted through air instead. She reached out with her cane, and she tapped on the knob. 

“Want me to get that?” Krista offered. 

“Oh, no, no. I got it.” 

Using nothing more than the tip of her cane, Mrs. Jones pulled the door closer to her: right before it closed, she gripped onto the knob and pulled the rest of the way. 

“Like somebody spilled a whole bottle of it on the floor down there,” she remarked. She then turned away from the door. “You wouldn’t happen to have some of it here in this house, would you?” 

“No way,” Krista remarked. “I did what I could to keep things like that out of here just because of what Joey was into and also—it's not the best thing in the world for you, either.” 

“Noxious, ghastly solvent used to thin out paint and polish wood. Very poisonous, too—especially for someone of your stature, Krista.” She knitted her eyebrows together and then tapped on the floor before her again. 

“What’re you thinking?” Krista asked him. 

“I’m thinking—this is merely a thought, as well, but—” She stopped. Krista raised her eyebrows and leaned her head closer to her. 

“But?” 

“I reckon someone is trying to kill you, Krista,” Mrs. Jones said in a soft voice. “Between losing Joey and now this here in your own home right before you raise a child. Someone is trying to wipe you off the face of the earth, if not get you out of this house. I don’t know if that’s reaching or not, but it feels rather likely, though, given turpentine is such a vile substance.” 

“Does make one paranoid, too,” she noted with a glimpse off to the side. 

“It definitely does. But I will ask Peter if he can go down there soon enough and find the true source of it, since the both of us are no condition for such matters.” 

Krista clasped a hand to her chest. “Oh, god, thank you, Mrs. Jones.” 

“This is as much my house as it is yours,” she promised her, “and therefore I have to watch over it as much as you possibly can as well.” 

Meanwhile, out in California, Alex hung up the receiver of the pay phone, which in turn gave him back a couple of nickels as spare change. After the deal with the Spin Doctors fell through, he had to make the most with what he had for this possible new gig with Savatage and anything else he could find for himself. He turned away from there and back to the counter on the other side of the room so the other three people behind him could have their chance at it. He took his spot there and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee and a muffin.  

He peered out the window out to the street outside. In the faint reflection, against the silhouettes of the buildings across the street, he made out the prominent, aquiline shape of his nose as well as his deep-set blue eyes which gazed back at him. A little Jewish boy in a rugged little neighborhood in southern Los Angeles, and all the while he thought about the gallery in England and also everything that Josh had told him and Krista. 

Indeed, when the waitress returned to him with the cup of coffee, he took a glimpse behind him to the few patrons in there. He very easily blended in with everyone else, especially when he ran another coat of black dye over his streak while up at his parents’ house, and yet that feeling over his head that the yarmulke and the medallion in his jacket pocket would bring attention to himself. He wasn’t so much worried about someone recognizing him given Testament and every other metal band in existence had found themselves in a strange spot at the moment with the rise of the alternative movement, but rather he had wondered into a different territory other than his own for a mere cup of coffee. 

It was almost in the vein of what happened to Peter over in Europe, but in the other direction, though. The one white boy to be found in a mostly Hispanic neighborhood, and one that had fallen on hard times in recent years. Near there was Downey, Compton, Lynwood, and Long Beach. 

He could always fetch a taxi over to Highland Park and Hollywood, but he decided not to, given everything over there was expensive. 

And thus, he sat there by himself. Granted, he showed the woman with black hair tied up in a disheveled bun upon her head and some rather prominent eye make-up right next to him a friendly little smile, but she wilted back at the mere sight of him and his blue eyes. At one point, he took out his medallion and put it around his neck, and he showed her the Star of David. She nodded her head at him and said something to him in Spanish. He shrugged his shoulders given he only knew a few stray words here and there, even with as much time as he spent around Chuck and Eric, two men who were half Mexican. 

“Eh— eres muy guapo, ” she said to him. He brought his hands to his chest as if giving a prayer and he bowed his head and showed her a friendly smile. 

“Uh,  gracias ,” he replied, and the waitress returned to him with his double chocolate muffin straight out of the oven and right on a plate. 

“Thank you!” he told her. 

“ ¿Te gustaría dormir conmigo? ” the woman asked him. 

“Come again?” Alex hesitated for a second, complete with a bit of the muffin top in his fingers. The waitress gestured for him to closer to her, even as he tucked it into his mouth. 

“She just asked you to sleep with her,” she whispered, and he almost choked on the bite of muffin at that. 

“ No cobro mucho ,” the woman continued, “ te ves un poco solo .” 

“She doesn’t charge much,” said the waitress. “She also says you look lonely.” He swallowed then he brought the plate closer to him. 

“Can I get this to-go please?” he asked her as his face bloomed with warmth. He didn’t want to tell the hooker that he had very little money on him but at the same time he couldn’t do that to himself. But lucky for him, another man waltzed up next to her and she turned her attention to him. The waitress was also kind enough to pour his coffee into a paper cup for him: once he had paid up, he ducked out of there and back to the street. 

The marine layer from that morning had burned off and the sun shone down on the street before him: he set his cup of coffee upon the post next to the door so he could put his wallet back in his jacket and then his sunglasses onto his face, all with one hand. 

Right across the street, he spotted a man with jet black hair, and for a second, he believed it to be Peter. He kept his eye on him long enough to realize he wasn’t nearly as tall as him. But at the same time, he wondered what was going on to warrant a visit from Peter in a gritty, working neighborhood in the southern Los Angeles area. The man peered up the street at the intersection and then he crossed. Alex held still with his sunglasses on to stay out of sight, as if he was merely minding his own business and enjoying his muffin. With every bite, he watched the man reach the corner up the sidewalk from him. He watched him duck behind the corner and that was his chance to follow him. 

Alex swallowed down the rest of the muffin stump and then picked up his cup of coffee and padded down the sidewalk, past all the nondescript buildings to that crosswalk in question. Around the corner stood a long low brick wall which held back a series of oleander bushes. Those little pink and white flowers already began to bud despite the thick of wintertime at the moment. He gazed on up the street where the man had walked to a black car. 

Alex recognized the driver with his sandy hair: right next to him was a woman with black sunglasses on. 

“I don’t believe this,” he muttered to himself, and he moved in closer to the wall for a better look back there down the street. The man turned to the side a bit, so Alex made sight of the first sprigs of a goatee on his face, and he nodded his head at the sight of him. The woman rolled down the window so they could talk to each other there on the street. 

If only he could hear what they were saying. He peered behind him to find if anyone was coming up behind him: after that round of blackjack with Peter, no way he would risk any of it. He then returned to the car up the street. 

George the Irishman said something that warranted a laugh from both Johnny and the woman. The next car at the stoplight rolled away and thus Alex could hear just a small sliver of what they were saying to each other. 

“It’s like—burning metal, isn’t it?” Johnny asked right then. 

“Yeah, it’s nahsty,” said George. “We might ‘ave t’ keep th’ area ventilated before we go any fuhther with any of ‘t.” 

“What about Krista and that kid—what was his name again?” Johnny asked again. 

“Uh, Alex, I think? What aboht them?” 

“What we do about them? We should make them a part of this whole thing?” 

“Nonsense. He's too smart, he’ll figure oht what we’re doin’ an’ she’s got er baby on the way from her dead huhsband.” 

“Oh, yeah, that’s right! But do you think we should do something about them, though? I mean, her house is worth a lot of money, at least that’s what I've heard anyways.” 

“Where’d you hear that?” the woman asked; it was hard to differentiate an Australian accent from a New Zealander one, especially with the noise on the street and especially with a siren off in the distance, but Alex closed his eyes to better focus on it. 

“Well, we got it from you, didn’t we?” Johnny asked her. 

“No,” said the woman and she shook her head. As far as Alex knew, she was completely blind, but he still stayed tucked around that corner lest one of them recognize him. 

“House is worth a loht of money an’ I think dose guys from Anthrax might need ‘t soon,” George replied. 

“They’re all gonna need it soon, George,” Johnny pointed out. “I think we’re just getting lucky, like we’re at the right place at the right time, even with our being involved in the metal world and whatnot. We have to think about this whole thing quick, too.” 

“Why is that?” asked the woman. 

“Well, I worry about—” Johnny gestured back a bit and Alex ducked back in the case of one of them seeing him. He closed his eyes and pursed his lips, and he braced himself. 

“Let’s goh for th’ green,” George said over the noise on the street. 

“Let’s go for the green,” Johnny declared. Alex peeked around the corner at Johnny as he took a step away from the car. 

“I’ll call you guys when I get back to Hollywood,” he told them. 

And Alex realized he had no choice but to follow him as he took another sip from his coffee. 

[ferdifz]

US senate UFO hearings, July 2023

The US Senate UAP/UFO hearings featuring 'whistleblower' David Gursh-whatsisname this morning kinda made me wanna paint my own original digital drawing, commenting how the hearings themselves hurt my brain cells.

…But unfortunately I have shirts to design for friends (read: more important things to do) so I'm settling for some quick n' dirty meme image macros.

To quote one of the replies under one of the article shares on Twitter/Threads/Mastodon:

I'm surprised the Flat-Earth Hearing didn't immediately follow this one.

———

I mean like, if you've got new concrete evidence and some actually valid new avenues of investigation then sure, present them and please make your case.

But if you're just going to rehash decades old theories and claim 2nd-hand witness from unwilling sources then the burden of proof is on you. (And the burden of proof, as far as I'm concerned in this particular moment in time, has not been satisfied.)

———

An explainer roundup-article I personally trust from The Guardian:

Grusch has not seen the alien craft himself, but said in an interview with the Debrief that his claims are based on “extensive interviews with high-level intelligence officials”.

———

Instead of "chaos grifters" I had thought of instead labeling that second one "cryptofascists". But I didn't go that route because I'm thinking the crypto/blockchain/NFT/generative art crowd would take away the wrong message, and it would lead to unnecessary & distracting debate.

When I say "cryptofascists" I'm thinking of all the cryptically dogpiling culture-war grifters like Milos Yiannopoulos, Alex Jones, Steve Bannon, whomever Q really was, all the trolls at 4chan/b/ and 4chan/pol, and all those who spout cryptic messages for the purpose of gaslighting society into believing that everything is meaningless and there is no truth. Cryptofascism is a societally toxic international ideology and I firmly stand against it.

Cryptofascism includes those who peddle flat-earth, climate change denial, anti-vaxx, protocols of the elders of zion and all such similar brain-melting conspiracy theories for the purposes of sowing chaos or just for t3h lulz.

Many of them, if not all of them, driven by personal vendetta for a world that they feel have "wronged" them or "cheated" them.

Their fuel is attention & "engagement", many of them grifting from supplement-pill hustles and oils and such to swindle billions of dollars from the depressed and lonely. I curse every keyboard & screen these cryptofasicsts touch.

[/rant]

Sorry for that firebrand just now I got myself a bit too worked up thinking about all this. 🙏🙏🙏

[letsbenditlikebennett]

TIMING: Some time after Alex got ouched by that hunter and before Rhett kidnapped Ariadne in his van. (Rude of him tbh :/ ) PARTIES: @ariadnewhitlock & @letsbenditlikebennett SUMMARY: Ariadne comes over to the cabin with snacks and to keep Alex company. They watch Daisy Jones & the Six. CONTENT: Just a sweet lil thread.

In hindsight, it seemed painfully obvious that Alex wouldn’t get a normal birthday party like every other young twenty-something who didn’t moonlight as a lupine monster three nights a month. If anything, the birthday plans only made it more difficult in the aftermath of her run-in with the hunter. There wasn’t really a super chill way to say ‘hey, sorry! I have to cancel that party because I was attacked by a hunter and have to recover’ to all her friends. At least the ones in the know could get a partial version of the truth, but for the others the vague excuse of a medical emergency had to do. Even then, it may not have been a good enough excuse. At least not for someone as sweet as Ariadne who thought she deserved some company and snacks in the wake of her medical emergency. What had she even told Ariadne? Power tool accident? Maybe it’d be best to just not mention even if the limp in her step made the fact there was an ordeal fairly obvious. 

It wasn’t like she could just yell out when she heard Ariadne’s footsteps approaching like she had with Cass. The whole super-hearing thing would be creepy without that context… or a dead giveaway. So Alex waited patiently for the knock on her door before moving away from her spot on the couch to open it. “Hey,” she greeted with a smile that she hoped didn’t look as pained as her body felt. 

“Welcome to la maison de Bennett,” she joked, “It’s small, but we’ve got a smart TV and a Hulu/Disney Plus bundle subscription. Come in, make yourself comfortable. Can I get you anything to drink? Once I sit back down on the couch, I’ll be pretty stationary for a while.” 

—

She was thoroughly done with her friends getting kidnapped or injured. Or having medical emergencies, which was what had happened to Alex. Ariadne didn’t know enough about medical things to help her in any real way, and so offering to be company and give snacks was the best she could manage.

Thankfully, Alex was more than accepting of what Ariadne’d had to offer, and so there was at least that worry off her chest (though admittedly, she felt selfish for even somewhat having had anxiety about anything when her friend had just had some sort of real actual emergency).

“Hey.” She offered her friend a gentle smile.

“It’s your home, I don’t care about the size.” Ariadne offered, “all I mean is, I’m here for you, not your stuff. I can get myself stuff to drink, if you want. But if you have a soda, I’ll take that. Or go get that for myself. Can I get you anything?”

—

“Of course you don’t,” Alex laughed as if it should have been obvious because shouldn’t it have been? Ariadne was never judgmental and was continually kind to everyone she met. It was something she admired about her friend even if she wished Aria stuck up for herself a little bit more. The block button was a friend, too, and she’d remind Aria of that if anyone dared to give her a hard time. “Not sure why I gave you of all people the disclaimer. We have our only judge people for being mean thing which I think is a good motto.” 

Given she wasn’t speaking to Andy and she was doing her damnedest to push Kaden away, the werewolf found she was particularly lonely whenever Cass wasn’t there. Alex found it a bit easier to relax into her spot on the couch knowing that Ariadne was there and she’d have some reprieve from her own thoughts which had grown far too loud for her liking. 

“We have plenty of soda in the fridge,” Alex exclaimed, “There’s Coke, root beer, creme soda, Dr. Pepper, Sprite, sparkling water, Baja Blast… you can grab whatever. I’ll take a Coke if you don’t mind grabbing me one while you’re in there.” 

She hated not being able to be a better host, but deep down, Alex knew that her friend didn’t mind grabbing her own drink or about hosting duties that the werewolf wasn’t able to perform. Aria was there just to be there. “I downloaded all of Daisy Jones and the Six off Amazon Prime,” she told her friend with a smile and patted the sea next to her on the couch, “Have you seen it? It’s totally fictional, but it’s like loosely based on the story of Fleetwood Mac so I thought you might enjoy it.” 

—

“I just – I don’t want you to think I’m going to go around judging you and stuff is all.” Not that Ariadne though Alex would automatically assume that, but it was better to just play it safe from the get-go, so as to limit the likelihood of things being misconstrued. Or maybe that was just the anxiety talking. That much of her anxiety had been around even before she died, so even if she wanted to blame it on becoming a monster, she couldn’t. “I think that’s a super duper good motto, yeah.”

She offered her friend a small shrug. “It’s nice to be here.” Which she’d probably already said and probably didn’t need repeating, but she wanted to highlight this. How good being around Alex felt.

“Dr. Pepper’s a win for me, always. Of course, I might put some ice in a glass if you’d like that? Make it… well, I don’t know if that counts as fancy, but you get what I mean. I hope.” Ariadne let out a halfway sort of a laugh, feeling awkward for a moment, if only because this was time for Alex, and not time for Ariadne to be taking up excessive space or making a total fool of herself.

“I actually have,” she buried her face in her hands for a moment, “but it’s super good and I’ve been meaning for a rewatch. Camila in it is so dreamy. I mean, to be fair, they all are, but…”

—

“I don't,” Alex assured. Surprisingly enough, she found that she meant it, too. Not once since she had met Ariadne had the werewolf ever felt judged and this moment was no different. Given, her friend didn't know everything there was to know about her and may have ran the other way if she knew she was a werewolf, but maybe she wouldn't. She seemed pretty big on the not judging people thing. ”It is,“ she smiled.

“I mean, she's a doctor,” Alex  joked, ”How could she not win? We love a well-educated... soft drink?“ She laughed a bit at how ridiculous her own joke was and gently smoothed over Puppyeye's fur as she stirred in her sleep. ”If you get out a couple of the wine glasses my cousin bought, I think it totally counts as fancy. I think there's actual glasses now, too... apparently everything isn't meant to be drank out of coffee mugs. Who knew?“

She knew, but they'd always been tight on money, so excess containers to hold their beverages seemed a little bit silly. Alex guessed that wasn't really the case anymore, but part of her still enjoyed her coffee mugs best. 

Alex kept her face from falling when Aria mentioned that she'd seen the show. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised since Aria had been the one to introduce her to Fleetwood Mac in the first place, but she found herself grinning when her friend seemed happy to rewatch. 

“A rewatch it is then,” she exclaimed, “With a super dreamy cast at that.” She nudged some blankets towards where Ariadne would be sitting and waiting for her friend to join in the spot beside her. “Did you read the book, too?” She knew the answer was probably yes, but it'd be nice to know how much the show followed the book. 

—

“Well, I’m glad you don’t.” She was, really. Exceptionally so, Ariadne found herself thinking. Alex was nice and cool and kind, and it was through pure luck that the two of them had met, and she was grateful for that, even if the fact that Alex wasn’t feeling well made her feel a bit (or more than a bit) down.

“Pretty impressive for a soft drink, yeah. I don’t know if any of the other ones have degrees, but I also don’t want to be rude and assume one way or the other.” Ariadne watched the dog twitch in her sleep. “Um – I – Puppyeye might be happier elsewhere? If – if that’s okay.” So that Ariadne didn’t ruin everything because of what she was, and because animals could tell that she was bad. “Coffee mugs are perfect, though, but fancy wine glasses sounds like a fun way to have soda, yeah!” She nodded, enthusiastically. “Also like, you can eat ice cream out of coffee mugs too, so they’re multi-use and get to have fun pictures on them, sometimes.”

Another nod. “Yes! It’ll be just as good as watching it for the first time, though. Because you’re totally right, the cast are all wildly dreamy. Do you have a favorite? Like, dreamiest one? I – only if you wanna share.” Ariadne wasn’t sure if that was too weird to ask, but she’d asked it already and so, she supposed, there was no real turning back now. “I did – well, I listened to it on audiobook, which was such a good way to read it.”

—

“I think it’s safe to say they’d throw doctor in the name if they were doctors,” Alex replied playfully, “That’d be a major marketing bag fumble if they weren’t throwing that in the name. So Dr. Pepper is clearly the genius of soft drinks. And delicious, which is the most important thing.” She heard a soft whimper in her head and saw Puppyeye twitching in her sleep. When Aria spoke, something clicked as she remembered her friend didn’t do too well around pets… and didn’t have a discernible heartbeat. “Oh, right,” she nodded and carefully lifted herself from the couch. 

“Here girl,” Alex lightly patted against her good leg for the puppy to follow to their room. Once the puppy was cozy in her bed, she shut the door quietly and made her way slowly back out to the living room, trying not to grimace with each step. She called out from the hallway, “Wine glasses it is.” 

She made an effort to not look towards the kitchen as she positioned herself back on the couch. While Alex has her suspicions about what Aria might be, she wasn’t sure she was ready to dive into the whole story of what happened with the hunter. She was tired of explaining… and mostly just tired. Soda and snacks and Daisy Jones sounded better than any of that. 

“We love a dreamy cast,” Alex smirked as Aria joined her on the couch, “I think we’re set up for the perfect afternoon of watching a whole season of a show. We’ve got soft drinks, candy, salty snacks… I can probably convince my cousin to bring home a pizza later.” She found herself cozying into the blankets as she pressed play and let herself be taken away by the story on the screen with the quiet and comforting presence of a good friend next to her. It was exactly the kind of afternoon she needed and she felt lucky to have a friend like Ariadne to spend it with. 

[mrschwartz]

some stuff about the curitiba show :)

when the roadies were setting up the stage, one of them soundchecked alex's mic, and a few minutes later another roadie came with wipes and sanitized the mic and the stand, which i thought was very nice and important

no mirrorballs in sight :( not even when they were setting up the stage

something that i forgot to mention in the primavera são paulo post: the song they've chosen to enter the stage to these past shows is tom jones's it's not unusual which is jfnjfvnjfvnjvn so funny for some reason

hearing sculptures live and as the first song on the set is still one of the best experiences i've had in my life (twice!!!). the instrumentals are impeccable, you can feel the bass, the drums and the synth in your whole body (not just the chest, which is my favorite part) and alex's voice is intoxicating. the gasp is still unbelievable and made me light-headed lol

when alex walked out i got pretty disappointed that he was wearing the same outfit that he did in primavera, but as the show went on i started to think that he didn't, bc i started to see that now in curitiba his blazer was black whereas in primavera it was blue. now i'm not so sure nvjfnjngj i think it really was the same blazer, the black one. lighting is crazy

alex was having some kind of trouble with his in-ear monitors, he kept taking them out and putting them back in. at first i thought it was bc he wanted to hear the crowd sing along, but then i realized that he kept gesturing to the crew on the wings of the stage to adjust the sound (by pointing at his mic than up, at matt than down, etc)

it was a bit chilly in curitiba by the time the show started (like 12ºC i think) and, bc of the dry ice on stage, you could see alex's breath coming out of his mouth when he sang. i thought that was just so cool. def an imagine that is forever engraved in my mind

hearing the entire crowd shout HA in that part in body paint was awesome

during 505 alex kept going HUH very emphatically every few lines for some fucking reason lol it didn't annoy my bc this was my third time seeing this song live and for me that sure made it very memorable but i'm sure that for the poor people experiencing it for the first time it must've been really jarring fnvjfvnjgbn

will forever and ever be trying to come to terms with the fact that they've could've played opp instead of 4/5 and fireside instead of the car but they didn't :( (i love 4/5 and the car but i had seen them in primavera already) wish i could've experienced that's where you're wrong live too :(

he walked on stage for the encore after the rest of the band in the nick of time again, just in time to help "guide" matt through the stabs before the main part of the song and to start singing on his cue

during mirrorball, when he sang the "for the moment when you look them in the eyes" line, he chose someone in the crowd to lock eyes with and stared at them for a good 20 seconds, and the crowd lost their colective minds lol. in the moment i thought that person must've Died but then the next day i found out that the person was the girl who met them in the hotel in rio de janeiro. i saw that she posted on instagram that he was trying to read the sign she'd brought. i messaged her and now we're friendly with each other lol

during r u mine alex kept glancing up at the sky and i'm pretty sure he was looking at the lightning, it started to rain the Second the show ended

he only said "obrigado" a few times but something in portuguese that he did say that surprised me a Lot (a lot) was "OIEEE" bc. for non-portuguese speakers: "oie" is Such a casual hi it's crazy. it's basically a "hiii <3" vfnkdmkjfg how does he know that who even taught him that how did that even come up vfkmdckfjgn he did it like two or three times, and i lost it in each one lol

he didn't walk around the stage so much as i was used to him doing when i saw them live in lolla 2019 and now in primavera, but he seemed very relaxed and happy and smiled a lot, thanked the crowd a bunch and threw a lot of kisses at us and stuff

after the show ended i stuck around and started screaming at the crew on stage to give me the setlist but when like over 5 of them had shrugged and smiled apologetically at me as if to say they couldn't, i decided it was time to give up lol (no one from the crowd ended up getting it, which made me feel better)

[andrea-lyn]

look at me, I am old, but I’m happy

(for @christchex because I truly believe her to be #1 Sanders supporter)

The damn kids are keeping something from him. None of them are good liars at the best of times, but every time Sanders shows up when Michael’s friends are around, suddenly they go real quiet. At first, he writes it off as stupid youthful hormone shit. It’s probably something to do with that Manes boy that Michael doesn’t want to talk about. Only, then Alex Manes starts coming around, Michael’s a lot happier, and the weird behavior keeps going. Something’s up, and it’s something Michael’s actively not telling him. “You know, I ought to fire you,” Sanders says one Sunday, when he and Michael are working on the sunflower fields. Michael scoffs, glancing up from the seeding mechanism he’s been working to fix, but he avoids meeting Sanders’ eyes. He’s known this boy since he tripped out of a pod and he knows when he’s about to be lied to. “I’d like to see you try,” he mutters, but his curiosity is sparked. “Why are you bothering to do that when most of my time is volunteered?” “Because you and your friends are keeping something from me.” “We’re not,” Michael lies. “You’re a terrible liar, boy,” Sanders warns, but he lets him get away with it. Just this once, he lets him. Michael waves him off and grabs his bundle of sunflowers to take back to the Airstream. He doesn’t say what or who they’re for, but Sanders knows. It’s the Manes boy, who’s been lurking around and grinning like an idiot all the time. With Michael gone, Sanders is left to consider what it is that’s being whispered about behind his back. There’s enough alien secrets in this town to fill a gossip rag, but Michael’s been fairly honest with him recently, even if he’s been trying to hide how gone he is over his thing with Alex Manes. The truth is this -- he’s an old man. The boy he used to be is a memory and a distant one at that. He’s taken Walt and locked him away behind mountains of bottles and liquor. There’s so much trauma related to those days that he actively works as hard as he can to forget it, and that’s why it takes him so long to realize that maybe he actually knows a bit more than he realizes when it comes to one of those alien secrets.

The secret they’re keeping comes to roost soon after. Well, roost ain’t exactly the word. “They still allow relics like you in this place?”

When Sanders had still been a child and had been happy with Miss Nora and Miss Louise, he’d always recalled their tension around the man they called Jones. They tried to keep it a secret from him then, too, and it’s irritating as hell that history’s repeating it-damn-self. “Relics like me belong more than you do around here,” Sanders scoffs, tossing the wrench into the toolbox. “I’m looking for Michael.” Sanders turns to take in the look of him. He blames his age on the fact that Max Evans never made him feel that icy chill down his spine to spark recognition. All those years with that face in front of him and he never remembered Jones, not until the alien himself busted out and started scaring Sanders all over like he’s a kid. He’s not a kid, though. He’s an old man tired of this bullshit and he’s not about to let an asshole push him around. “Michael,” Sanders says sharply, “ain’t none of your business.” “He’s none of yours either,” Jones says calmly. “Besides, you’re right. It’s not business. It’s family.” It comes back in fits and starts. Miss Nora’s discomfort with Jones’ hand on her shoulder, but the possessive way Jones held onto her. The way Jones had always seemed more occupied with one of the pods. The possessive and keen look in his eye when he’d looked at Walt dismissively, like a human child that Nora took a liking to could never pass muster. There’s only one explanation that Sanders sees, but as far as he’s concerned, it’s crap. “You’re not that boy’s father,” Sanders scoffs. “Or, you might be by blood or whatever alien junk flows through those veins of yours. That boy needed a father growing up and I sure as hell didn’t do the job well enough, but at least I’ve been here. At least I’ve been trying. That’s a hell of a lot more than you can say.” He’s an old and very stupid man, seeing as he knows how much Jones can hurt him. That raised alien hand glowing furiously red is a bad sign, but Sanders decides that if this is how he’s going out, defending Michael is the way he wants to go. “I might have been late getting my act cleaned up, but I still gave him everything I could. I’d die for that boy,” Sanders vows. “For my kid.” Jones scoffs, amused by Sanders’ loyalty like it’s a joke, but then, he always has been an ass, hasn’t he? “Funny you should say that, because today’s your lucky day for getting what you want.” He approaches swiftly, but before he can seal that glowing hand on Sanders’ chest, he just … stops. Sanders refuses to blink. He’s going to stare down his death as long as Jones wants to kill him, which is why he doesn’t notice that he’s being held in place by someone else’s alien powers. “Try,” Michael Guerin snaps at Jones, where he’s holding a bundle of sunflowers in one hand, and holding Jones in place with the other. “You’re not gonna like what happens to you.” Sanders is pretty sure Michael’s bluffing and that when it comes to these two, Michael’s not the one with the upper hand. Still, Jones is playing some kind of long game, because he steps back and lifts both hands up, stepping back and away. “Just two old friends catching up,” he insists, a look in his eyes that says he’s coming back to find Sanders when Michael’s not around. Still, he goes. He goes and he doesn’t look back, leaving Sanders to exhale, slumping over the pick-up truck he’s been working on. “What the hell were you thinking?” Michael demands. “Taunting him like that? He’s an evil dictator! He’s…” “Yeah, yeah, I got the gist decades ago,” Sanders cuts him off. “All I know is what he’s not, and that’s any kind of father to you. Because I might not be the world’s best Dad, but when it comes to it these days, he doesn’t get to swan in and make you feel like you owe him anything. He doesn’t get to make you feel like you belong to him.” This is all getting too damn emotional for him, but he wants to make one thing clear. “I know I didn’t manage the way I should’ve, but if anyone’s a father to you these days, it’s me.” With that said, he gives a firm nod, and hopes that he’s not going to do anything embarrassing like start crying about it. Well, he might not, but Michael’s struggling to keep it together, by the looks of it, so maybe that’s exactly what it is he needs to hear. “What the hell are you doing back here anyway?” Sanders grunts, when the awkward silence drags on too long. Michael clears his throat, gesturing to the Airstream with the flowers (and conveniently wiping at his nose). “I forgot some papers that I wanted to go over with Alex,” he says, “Lucky I did, or you would’ve been alien dust.” “I got a few tricks up my old sleeves,” Sanders promises, even if he doesn’t have them yet. “So. You and Alex Manes, huh? You ready to admit to me that it’s a thing yet?” Michael wrinkles his nose, but he’s clearly not thinking about Jones anymore, so Sanders considers it a mission accomplished. “How about you start worrying about how much of a thing it is when Alex needs to come get permission from my Dad to marry me,” Michael quips, and he sounds free and happy and brazen and goddamn high. It’s the most that Sanders could ever hope for. “That likely to happen anytime soon?” Michael shrugs, ducking back out of the Airstream with the papers. “You know I don’t do things slow.” “Don’t I ever,” he mutters. “Just warn me before I got alien grandchildren running around the damn scrapyard, will you? The place needs to be alien-proofed.” The look of sheer glee on Michael’s face settles something in Sanders’ chest. He knows he’s happy. He knows he’s settled. He might have missed too many damn years when he was younger, but at least he’s trying now. “Go on,” Sanders encourages. “Go be with your friend,” he teases. “You gonna be okay?” “I’ve survived worse,” Sanders promises. “Now, get,” he insists, and watches Michael leave the scrapyard, off to woo his paramour. As for him? Well, he’s got a hell of a long drive ahead of him to get to the reservation if he wants to pick up some pollen, but after tonight, Sanders figures he ought to protect himself. He’s got a family to worry about, after all. 

[piffmon]

This is the best movie I've watched all year. I want to discuss it.

If you're unfamiliar, this movie is a documentary about the creation of Pepe the Frog and how the comic character became a registered hate symbol used by the far right, and the creator's attempts to reclaim Pepe and save his image. It's simply heartbreaking: a brutally honest cautionary tale of fame that trumps anything a fictitious story could tell. It's the greatest fear of every artist put on a global scale, a scale that seeped into the real world. Matt Furie's guilt over creating Pepe is the most crushing aspect. He had to be the face of a Pepe that wasn't his.

All of this tragedy is told perfectly by the interviewees, which consists of Matt Furie himself, his friends and family, psychologists, and 4chan users at the time. The perspectives are simply perfect. Hearing from 4chan users and psychologists on the thought process of why people used Pepe in that way is simultaneously an incredibly interesting peek into human psychology and a sickening realization of humanity's worst attributes. The film infected me with this sense of hopeless urgency. It felt like something needed to be done, but when the film highlights Furie's failed attempt at making Pepe peaceful, all hope is lost. Something needs to be done, but nothing can be done. That hopeless feeling is compounded by new developments in technology. In an age where the internet is only invading the real world more with augmented reality, a meme like Pepe spilling into the political world is something that feels all but guaranteed in the future.

Despite the depressing core of this movie, it ends hopefully. Furie sues Alex Jones and neo-nazi websites for uncopyrighted use of Pepe, taking the frog off many hateful websites and products. The film also shows that in Hong Kong, Pepe is a symbol of freedom and democracy. Things may finally be turning around for him.

Finally, I want to praise the film's presentation. There's tons of incredibly fluid and vivid animation throughout. Whether it was an animation of a comic or an animation of Pepe's state of being, they were all amazing and made an otherwise hopeless affair a bit more lively. I can't express how cool all of it is.

This movie is awesome. It's free to watch on Tubi in the U.S. and it's only an hour and a half. It'll fuck you up, but it's still beautiful.

[notsowrites]

Untitled 3x08 Malex Coda #3

Last one before tonight! Why I get inspired to write about these two first thing in the morning when I’m drinking my coffee is beyond me, but here’s some more soft Malex with a bit of fluff.

Enjoy! <3

----------

They head back inside not long after, the cold winter air nipping at Alex's skin. Maria is sitting up near the pool tables, cell phone pressed to her ear, and Alex focuses on the smile on her face, the absolute happiness he can see radiating off her. She looks up as they walk in, waving at them, but their presence is not enough to get her to end the call.

Michael is already back at the bar, leaning against it, knocking shoulders with Isobel, Liz sitting just on her other side. There's a bottle of wine between them, and two half-filled glasses.

"She's on the phone with your brother," Liz supplies as he joins them.

He nods. It's not new, this thing between his brother and Maria. But the two of them acting on the looks that he's known they've shared since high school certainly is.

Sliding into the open seat to Michael's right is easy enough, and it does wonders to get the weight off his hip for now. His fingers dig into the muscle of his leg, gently massaging it as he watches Michael slide another beer in front of him.

"You okay?"

Michael's voice is quiet, almost a whisper in the already quiet bar. The only other people here are people he loves, people he trusts. He nods.

"Just sore."

He goes for honesty, which seems to be the theme of the day for them, and watches as Michael's eyes dart to his leg and further down to where his prosthetic is beneath his jeans. There's nothing he can do right now, not until he's home and can take it off, remove the lining, and possibly soak in the bathtub to ease the tension in it. But that can wait, because being here, with the people he loves and cares about is more important.

It's the most important thing.

"We can leave," Michael replies, as if reading his thoughts, but Alex reaches out, slipping his hand into Michael's, and shaking his head.

Liz speaks up first, her eyes going from Michael to him, and back again. "You don't have to stay. Max is safe, thanks to you. We should take the win and enjoy tonight."

The fight leaves him at Liz's words, and he acquiesces, sliding off the stool, and stretching his leg, one hand on the back of the bar stool for balance. He can feel Michael's eyes on him, watching him, and for once he loves how it feels. It's so easy to reach out, to grab Michael's hand in his own and give it a reassuring squeeze, before he crosses the floor towards Maria.

"So your I guess it's our time vibes were only a couple weeks off, eh?" He hears Isobel ask behind him, but doesn't turn around to look at how Michael reacts, only hearing Liz's shocked gasp instead.

"Greg, hold on, hold on, Alex is here-" Maria turns towards him, pulling the phone away from her ear and wrapping her arms around him. He stumbles a bit, expecting the weight but miscalculating for how tired he is. She immediately pulls back, looking him up and down, assessing.

He presses a kiss to her cheek. "I'm fine, just tired. Michael and I are heading out, but I didn't want to leave without telling you."

She raises an eyebrow at him.

"I'll call you tomorrow." He feels his cheeks go warm, and shifts on his feet, not out of the soreness in his hip this time.

"You better," Maria laughs as she puts the phone back up to her ear, and Alex can immediately hear his brother, just can't make out the words. He watches as Maria smiles, a laugh escaping her lips as she looks back at him.

"Greg says it's about damn time."

With a bit of an eyeroll, he leaves the two of them to their conversation and turns back to the bar, surprised to find Michael is standing near the doorway. There's a feeling that blossoms in his chest, seeing Michael standing there, waiting, for him. And after spending the day together, Alex isn't ready for it to end.

"Can you take me home?"

The car ride is quiet, but not awkward. Alex pushes himself up against the passenger door, and shifts himself so he's staring at Michael as he drives. Something he hasn't done since they were teenagers when they'd get in Michael's truck and drive out to the desert - the only way after the toolshed they could find some time for themselves.

Michael's hat is sitting on the seat between them, and Alex brushes his fingers along the rim. He loves the cowboy look, even if it covers up Michael's curls. Because he really is in love with Michael Guerin any way you slice it.

His house is on a quiet side street outside town, the yard lights on thanks to their automatic timer, illuminating the terrace and the front door. He and Maria had strung them up one Saturday afternoon a few weeks after he'd bought the house, her claiming it needed some ambiance. She'd been the one to help him pick out the patio furniture, and start making the house into some place he could call home.

Michael pulls the truck into the driveway next to his SUV, and Alex reaches for the door handle, before he realizes the engine is idling. 

Does he want Michael to leave? He doesn't know. Today was a whirlwind for them - working together, talking, and Michael kissing him. As he'd pressed his face into Michael's shoulder earlier, he'd realized how much he missed this - missed Michael. There had always been something about the way it felt around him, when they weren't fighting, when they had a moment of quiet - an unexplainable calm that would fall over him. For the first time in years, he'd felt it again that morning, and then again later in the truck when Michael had touched his cheek.

He wouldn't label it an understanding, because it felt much deeper than that.

"Michael?"

"Yeah?"

But Michael makes no move to turn off the engine, so Alex tugs on that courage he'd used all day to tell Michael what he wanted. He'd never felt the need to put into words his every day actions - and perhaps part of that was his years in the Air Force, and the work he'd done that required a level of secrecy. But keeping Michael out of the loop recently hadn't done them, or their relationship, any favors. And he hated to see Michael so angry at him.

"Shut the engine off and come inside."

He watches Michael turn to him, eyes soft and beautiful, and Alex doesn't know sometimes, what to do with the way Michael makes him feel. He never has. If he was younger, if he was more agile than he is these days, he'd climb over onto Michael's lap and kiss him here in the truck. So instead he reaches over the cowboy hat, and slips his fingers under Michael's, tightening his grip.

"You sure?"

Alex nods. 

But Michael's hesitance doesn't end there, and follows him into the house. Alex coaxes him out of his jacket, his boots, and watches as he slowly walks into the living room, glancing around as if unsure of himself. And Michael has been here before, Michael's been here a lot over the years.

"You got rid of the cameras," he says, nodding up where the one above his bedroom door used to be.

The cameras were something he'd installed under the belief that he couldn't trust his father. There had always been that residual fear he would break in and try something to get one up on Alex. So the cameras had made him feel like he was being proactive, like his father couldn't sneak up on him if he had a system in place.

"Yeah, don't need them anymore." He doesn't want to talk about his dad. Not now. It's not that he wants to brush it under the rug and never speak of it, because he knows there are a lot of things they need to talk about. But Liz's words echo in his mind about taking the win today for what it is, and doing that means not focusing on something like his father.

"That's good," Michael says, his voice low, and Alex doesn't move, just stands still as Michael walks over to him, a smile pushing up on his lips. He feels Michael's hands on his face, palms against his cheeks and lets Michael kiss him.

He feels the scratch of Michael's beard and the soft press of his lips and Alex presses forward just a little, his hands moving to Michael's hips, bracing himself. The kiss is slow and gentle, and Alex feels like he's falling. There's no rush in either of their actions, Michael's fingertips lightly scratching at the nape of his neck, their noses bumping, and their foreheads end up pressed together as their lips separate.

"I want-" He pauses, pushing back just far enough so he can look up at Michael. He doesn't want to not be looking at him when he speaks. But he thinks of Michael's reluctance to come inside, and he thinks of the words Michael had once expressed to him about going where Alex wants, and he needs to make sure this is what Michael wants too. "Will you stay the night?"

----------

In the morning, he wakes up tangled up in Michael. There's no panic that sets in, no worry about one of them leaving, even if they haven't talked about the future yet. Because there's time for that now. And Alex knows, believes, they both want one together.

He opens his eyes to find Michael already awake, eyes open and watching him. It should be creepy, but instead all Alex feels is love.

"Morning," Michael says, leaning in and gently kissing his lips.

"Been awake long?"

Michael shakes his head. "I've never watched you sleep before. You always-" He cuts himself off and Alex can fill in the rest himself. He knows this story too.

Last night had been different though, from anything they'd ever done in the past. It felt like a new beginning for them, the way the whole day had. Michael had drawn the bath while Alex had gone through his nightly routine, finally getting the chance to remove his prosthetic. And as Alex had laid back in the tub, letting the hot water soothe his sore muscles, Michael had sat on the floor next to the tub, resting his head on his arm, and they'd just… talked.

Talked in a way they never had before. Alex had listened as Michael had finally told him everything he'd learned from Jones - from the white lies to the discovery of his own origins. He'd been unable to stop himself from taking Michael's hand as he talked about his mother, the way he'd started to doubt his own feelings about her, and the things she had done. Most shocking of all was when Michael asked to show him something, and Alex had just nodded before he was watching as Michael pulled a lighter out of his jeans and held the flame to the skin of his palm.

Instinct had him snatching Michael's hand, pulling it away from the flame - but his skin was perfect. The flame hadn't harmed him.

"I want to make you breakfast," Michael says instead.

Alex laughs, immediately burying his face into Michael's shoulder, because while a great idea, he doesn't exactly keep a fully stocked kitchen. Especially since he's a terrible cook himself, and restocking the fridge after his year spent cleaning up Project Shepherd messes hasn't been a huge priority.

"I'd like that except…" he lets his voice trail off, but leans up and kisses Michael. "I'm not sure there's much in the fridge to cook with."

Michael shakes his head, laughing, and Alex kisses him again, pulling himself up so he's leaning over Michael, his fingers stroking Michael's curls, gently tugging on the ends and watching as they spring back into place.

"Another time then."

Alex leans forward, their lips almost touching as he smiles. Because another time is a future they now have together. It's tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that. "Tomorrow."

"Yeah?"

"I don't want - I meant what I said all those months ago. About starting over. And-" He pauses, thinking about every night he's spent with Michael that ended with one of them leaving, the other never staying. "We've never had breakfast before."

They trade lazy kisses, neither of them able to stop smiling, and it's slow and perfect, and Alex thinks he could stay wrapped up in Michael Guerin forever. But he gets an idea, and it's a good one. And he knows Michael will be okay with it, that Michael will agree to it. Because now he knows Michael feels the same, that Michael wants the same things for them.

"Let's go to the Crashdown," he says against Michael's lips.

Michael pushes back, not away but enough so he's looking at Alex. And there's a flicker of something on his eyes, an old hurt resurfacing that Alex can see. Another thing they need to talk about.

"Like a date?"

Alex rolls his eyes, but kisses Michael again. "Like a date. Like two people having breakfast. I just - I want to do these things with you. I want us to be able to do these things."

"Okay, Manes," Michael replies, pushing up quickly and kissing Alex, like he can't get enough. "Let's go have pancakes."

[pastelwitchling]

“It’s cloudy, cold and I have a sleeping love of my life in my arms, go find someone else to play your alien catcher games,” Michael whisper yelled and hung up.

When Michael had woken up to a sleeping Alex’s face inches away from his own, he’d been afraid he was dreaming. But as he traced Alex’s cheek with the back of his fingers now and Alex made a soft sound at the back of his throat like a disturbed kitten and burrowed deeper into the warmth of Michael’s chest, as the memory of what they’d done last night and how close they’d been and the time they’d taken to explore every inch of one another’s skin, for once in no hurry, a smile of awe tugged at Michael’s lips.

The wind howled outside, unable to touch them here under the heavy duvet Alex had brought over last night because he’d wanted to make sure Michael was staying warm, and Michael let his hand fall down Alex’s shoulder, his arm, silently reveling in the way Alex shuddered in his sleep and curled up even closer, leaving no room between them.

Alex must’ve been exhausted if even Michael’s quiet giggles into the crook of his neck as he hugged him unbearably close couldn’t wake him. Or maybe, Michael thought, he had worn him out last night. The thought made him bite his lower lip and press his face to Alex’s neck and inhale. He was tired himself, easily able to go back to sleep for several more hours, but he didn’t want to stop staring at Alex. He had neverseen Alex sleep before, never gotten the chance to watch him, to touch his body and watch the way he reacted even in his dreams.

At one point, Alex started twitching slightly, his brows pinched. He made a quiet whimpering sound, turning his head left and right. Nightmares. Michael remembered Alex talking about this once before he seemed to realized he’d mentioned them at all and dismissed Michael’s concerns. Because that was Alex, wasn’t it? Nothing ever hurt him. He couldn’t affordto let anything hurt him.

Michael wouldn’t have that. He pressed his lips to Alex’s ear and softly shushed him, his other finger tracing a line from Alex’s brow down to the tip of his nose and back up again.

“Shh,” he whispered as softly as he could. “You’re okay, Alex. You’re safe here. You’re with me.”

“My Michael,” Alex murmured in a breath barely quieter than a whisper, as if every part of his mind yearned for Michael to be closer, before he pushed his face into Michael’s chest hair and his breaths settled again.

“Yeah, baby,” Michael murmured against Alex’s lips. “Your Michael.”

He opened his mouth against Alex’s, leaning in to kiss him, when his phone buzzed on the counter behind their heads. Alex flinched at the sudden sound, whimpering ever so slightly, before Michael levitated the phone right into his hand and answered his sister through grit teeth.

“What?” he hissed.

“I need you at the Crashdown,” Isobel said. “Max and Liz might have a trail on Jones and Rosa’s working on hearing frequencies.”

Michael shook his head. “Great, sounds like you’ve got everything taken care of. I’ll see you in five hours.” He looked down at Alex, his naked torso, his strong arms, his rosy cheeks and lips. His mouth watered at the thought of what they would do when he woke up. “Make that seven.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Isobel said sarcastically, “did you forget that there’s an evil alien with our brother’s face going around killing people?”

“Alex has a radar set up to find him,” Michael said, unable to help the smugness in his voice. “Tuned in to his frequency and his particular signature. He’s also got an alert system set up so if it finds anything, we’ll know. That said, good night.”

“It’s seven in the morning!”

“Not for us,” he argued.

“Michael!”

“Listen, it’s cloudy, cold, and I have the love of my life sleeping in my arms,” he whisper-yelled. “Go find someone else to play your little alien catcher games,” and he hung up.

Letting his phone float back to the counter, Michael snuggled back down until he was comfortably curled up with Alex again. He was just starting to heave a long breath when heavy knocks came at the door.

“MICHAEL!” Isobel’s voice sounded. “You are not sleeping in when Rosa needs your help, OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR!”

Alex flinched, his eyes flying open this time as he sat upright.

“No no no,” Michael murmured, taking Alex’s groggy face in his hands and pulling him in.

“What’s happening?” Alex mumbled, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“It’s okay, go back to sleep, everything’s –”

“Michael!”

Alex turned in the direction of the door, brows furrowed. “Is that Isobel?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Open up!”

“What’s wrong with her?” Alex started to get out of bed.

“Do not get out of bed!”

“Guerin,” he said, more awake now, “she could need help.”

“Who cares?!”

Alex pulled on a pair of briefs, Michael’s pair of briefs, which made Michael die all over again, and opened the door to Isobel’s knocking.

Isobel’s fist was up mid-knock, and her eyes widened at the sight of Alex, half-naked, in front of her.

“Oh my god,” she muttered, “you really are here. Oh my god,” she repeated, her wide eyes raking Alex’s body up and down. Michael felt a possessiveness force him out of bed in one step. Isobel reached out as if to touch his pecs. “You – uh – sure you’re completelygay?”

Michael came in between them at the last second, keeping Alex behind him, his grip on his arm tight. “Yes,” he said through grit teeth. “Don’t touch him. Nobody touches him but me.”

Isobel raised a brow, unimpressed, and Alex sighed, a half-amused, half-exasperated smile tugging at his lips.

“Oh,” he said. “It’s one of those mornings. I’ll get dressed.”

“What?” Michael whipped around. “No, you’re not going anywhere.”

“Actually, if Alex comes, then you could stay in bed,” Isobel told Michael with a self-satisfied grin. “Isn’t that what you want?”

“I want to stay in bed with Alex,” Michael growled. “Alex, you don’t have to go anywhere, you’ve worked hard enough this week!” He stepped closer to Alex to keep Isobel from listening in, and lowered his voice. “After what happened with the Lockhart Machine –”

“Don’t do that,” Alex said, though everything about him was fond. He cupped Michael’s cheek. “I’m not made of glass, I can handle this.”

“I don’t want you to handle this,” Michael argued, gripping Alex’s waist to keep him here. “Please, Alex, I . . . just not yet. Just give us today. For me, please.”

And as always, Alex seemed able to see into his thoughts. I’m not ready to see you risk your life again, not so soon. You may be tough enough to handle it, but I’m not.

For a moment, Michael worried Alex would dismiss his concerns, tell him he was worrying for nothing. But then Alex’s shoulders fell, he gave a half, soft smile, and leaned in, kissing Michael’s lips. When he pulled back, he spoke to Isobel over Michael’s shoulder.

“Sorry, Isobel,” he said. “We can’t today.”

Isobel, who’d been watching the exchange, had her eyes narrowed, her brows furrowed in concern. She seemed to realize something horrible had happened recently, even if Michael was unwilling to talk about it. She nodded.

“Okay,” she said, then took a deep breath and repeated, “Okay. I’ll – uh – let everyone know it’s your day off. Sorry to wake you guys.” She turned, then stopped, and looked back at Alex. “So definitely gay then?”

“Get out!” Michael snapped as Alex burst into laughter behind him, clutching Michael’s shoulders to steady himself.

Isobel looked more put out that Alex was off limits than for anything else, and as soon as she had driven away, Michael shut the trailer door with his mind and picked Alex off the ground. He tossed him onto the bed and hovered above him. Alex’s eyes darkened as he gripped his arms, urging him closer.

Michael leaned in, pressing their foreheads together, taking just a few short seconds to reassure himself that Alex wasn’t on a ledge, but here, safe and sound in bed with him, before he bit Alex’s lower lip and grinded his hips down.

Alex’s lips parted in a moan and Michael took the opportunity to slot their mouths together. When he pulled back, Alex’s eyes were dazed and his cheeks were flushed.

“Guess I’m just gonna have to wear you out again,” he breathed, and kissed Alex’s eager grin.

I deviated just a little bit, hope that's okay. Prompt requests have been permanently opened, y'all, but no promises on how quickly I will deliver them.

[tahanann]

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐋𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮

❝ To whoever finds these letters, I hope they reach you well ❞ ✎▫✧⭒....

Fandom: Hetalia Relationship: F/M Pairing: Alfred F. Jones (America) / (Female) Reader Chapter list: 00, 01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14 Also posted on: AO3, Wattpad, Quotev

Chapter 03: " I hit homeruns when I was young" ✎▫✧⭒…

(Y/n) had only been reading Jones' letters for a few days, but she wakes up every morning almost giddy to hear a word from him. The woman knew that it was strange for her to feel like this. In fact, she questioned why she was like this, but she never found an answer to it. Maybe it was because it felt like she had company in her new home.

She was growing fond of jones, after reading three weeks' worth of letters. His banter manage to make her laugh sometimes. When she said that Jones was good company, she really meant it. Sometimes Jones would mention his close friends, and how tight-knit they've become ever since joining the army. He's talked about how the days have been warm, despite the war around them.

Jones enjoyed being around his friends, shooting and fighting for a cause that he believed was right. He speaks of heroism in his letters, wishing that one day he too would be regarded as a hero, be it just a family hero or the town hero. 

Whenever (Y/n) reads his letters, there's some sort of pang of guilt and sadness nestled in her stomach. It made her sick, but she tried to laugh it off. The woman pitied him, seeing as he wanted so much in life. She doesn't know how his story ends, but she hopes and prays that it won't end horribly. 

Another day has passed in the woman's home.

(Y/n) flutters her eyes open as the sun shines in her eyes. The woman sat up from her bed, rubbing her eyes as she yawned. She edges off her bed, put on her slippers, and started her morning routine. As she didn't have work today, she figured that she might spend it with her dad. The old man had texted her earlier in the week, asking if he could come over. 

As (Y/n) hadn't seen her dad in a while, she agreed. He would be coming over today. Her mother was busy working anyway.

The lady made her way to her room, fully awake and fresh for the day. She pushes strands of her hair back as she looked through her phone. Her dad might take a while to get her, so...she has time. Hopping off the mattress, she reaches underneath to pull out the box. She picked a letter from the stack and tucked the container back under the bed. She was ever so gentle when opening it. 

A smile appeared on her features as she read the greeting.

Good evening babe! Today was a bit eventful! It was a rest day for our group and someone sent out the other soldiers to fight in the field today. The majority of soldiers crowded the radio since they were talking about the latest game between the Boston Red Sox and the New York Yankees! Let me tell you, babe, the amount of cheering and screaming we had tonight was as loud as the soldiers yelling at each other during battle. Even Charles and Alex were fighting with each other!  You know how they are. When it comes to baseball, they are definitely rivals. They always like different teams, but as for me? Well babe, Boston all the way! Hey, if you're a fan of New York Yankees, I don't really mind. Well, there might be a few moments where we might bicker, but hey, I honestly hope it ain't serious! Besides, there'll be more sports memorabilia in our home right?  Well, I don't want to assume that you like sports and all! We just never really talked about sports when we were together. I don't think I bothered asking, honestly. If I did, I would have taken you to a Red Sox game for a date! Anyway, speaking of sports, and since I have a lot more paper, let me tell you about my sports history! I would have loved to bring it up to you when we were still together, but unfortunately, that didn't happen. I don't think I've ever told you that I was on a baseball team back then! Before my ma and pa moved, we were in Boston, hence why I'm such a big fan of the Red Sox. Got to support the local team you know? Anyway, I actually joined a mini-league in elementary and high school! I dreamed of becoming the best hitter out there! Well, as you can probably see, I didn't really get there. All the academics were catching up to me. Of course, I could have pursued it in college, but with the economics major, it was getting harder to have free time. Maybe one day I'll be able to play one game, especially when I get home. Hey, if you ever wanna try hitting home runs I can always teach you when I get home! I would love to teach you baseball. If you're already a home runner, then, maybe we can compete to see how many home runs we can get. Please continue to take care of yourself, babe. I can't wait to see your next letter. From your super cool and super handsome and super awesome boyfriend, A. F. J.

(Y/n) looked at the letter, specifically at the paragraph where Jones was talking about teaching his sweetheart baseball. There was something crossed out between "I would love to teach you baseball" and "If you're already a home runner..." She tilted her head to the side as she eyed it out. Jones has never crossed out the words in his letters. Most of the time, his writing was tidy, with a few grammatical errors here and there.

What was he trying to erase?

She sat there for a moment, thinking if she should try and uncover what he was trying to say. She was already trying to figure him out, might as well see whatever he covered up.

The woman placed the letter down on the bed and went to turn on the bedroom lights. Returning, she held the letter up in the air, turning it to a certain angle. The light illuminated through the paper, showing the many marks. There it was, the blocked-out text.

"I'd say I still got it, since I've hit a home run with you." (Y/n) arched her brow as she read the lines out loud.

"Are you kidding? that's what you blocked out?" A soft giggle escape her lips as she shook her head. She doesn't know whether she should grimace or laugh more at Jones' pick-up line. He could definitely use some work when it comes to pick-up lines.

It was weird. This was the only letter so far where he's said a pick-up line. Since he crossed that out, he probably read over the letter himself and got embarrassed by it. He didn't have a paper to write the letter over again, so he had to block it out. 

A smile appeared on the woman's face as she tucked the letter back in its envelope. She placed it inside a drawer with the rest of the opened letters. She left her bed to get ready to meet her father. As she was still in her pajamas, she figured that she should probably change into more casual clothes. 

(Y/n) knew her dad. He was the type of guy to bring her outside, complaining that she should get more sunlight. Her work and her hermit lifestyle made it impossible for her to get some sun. She doesn't know where he's going to take her but she'll prepare her bags. 

Grabbing her bag of choice from her closet, she brought it out to the bed, placing everything she needs. Her wallet and portable charger were tucked in the main pocket. Whatever she considered was essential to her trip was tucked in her bag. 

She lazed around in her room, browsing through her phone for whatever might interest her. She would stay there for an hour or two until her father called her cell. 

"Hey," (Y/n) grinned, "Lemme guess, you're already outside dad."

"Yeah, and I honestly hope you're out of your pajamas because I'm taking you to the mall," (Y/n) father, Raphael spoke. A hearty laugh was heard through the cell as (Y/n) made her way outside. 

"Don't worry, I already know you were taking me outside today, dad." She hung up the call and shoved her phone in one of her free pockets. The woman roamed around her home for a bit, taking out plugs from their sockets. It was to conserve energy and lessen the chance of her old home from bursting into flames. She made her way to the front door and locked it once she was outside. 

There, parked in her driveway, was her father's car. She doesn't really much about cars, but she knows from her dad that it was an older version of a Dodge Challenger. Somewhere around the '70s. The red hot car revved its engine as soon as (Y/n) came into view. The woman could only roll her eyes before making her way to the passenger seat. 

"You're gonna disturb the neighbors, dad," (Y/n) mumbled, buckling her seat.

"This neighborhood is too quiet. Gotta fill this graveyard with something," Raphael joked around. He backed up his car from the driveway and drove forward to wherever. He said the mall earlier but this old man's mind changes pretty often. He might take her somewhere else. Whatever the surprise might be, (Y/n) is sure that it isn't going to be that bad.

Throughout the ride, the woman talked with her father. Most of the time their conversations revolved around how he fared with his new wife and how she was doing with the new house. (Y/n) doesn't have any strong feelings against her father's new wife. It's an ok relationship. As for the house, a few cold spots here and there, but nothing out of the ordinary.

Well for owning an old house anyway. 

The car eventually stopped in a parking lot, with the father leaving the car first. He was quick to his feet and opened the door for his daughter. 

"Dad-" (Y/n) mumbled.

"Come on, let me be the gentleman this fine evening," Raphael grinned. 

The woman rolled her eyes before exiting the car. She walked alongside her father as they approached the giant mall. It was a place she's never been to before. The ride to the mall did take a while. In fact, earlier, she had noticed that they passed the usual way for the local mall. They must be in another town.

They walked around together, with the father spoiling his child just like he had done in the past. Whenever (Y/n) had pulled out her wallet to pay for something, her father always barged in and pulled out his card. Every time he did that, the woman had a defeated look on her face, but she shook it off and laughed. 

Raphael carried the many bags filled with both his and his daughter's stuff. They made their way to the food court, but they stopped. 

"I've got a better idea. What do you say we go to some buffet or a fancier restaurant!" The bearded man grinned looking at his daughter. 

"And walk in looking like this?" (Y/n) smiled, "those fancy restaurants will never catch me wearing just this." The woman tugged on her dad's arm, pointing at the food court. "Besides, we've spent so much already! You wouldn't want Jeanne getting angry at you again for spending so much on me." 

"You do have a point," Raphael mumbled, "I mean maybe the new bags can make Jeanne smile."

"Maybe," (Y/n) hummed, "Still, you should probably save money, dad." 

The old man nodded his head. He didn't want to prolong his conversation with her. He knew how his daughter is. If she disagreed with him, especially with matters like this, they would go on for hours. She's got her mother's mouth, that's for sure, but that isn't inherently a bad thing. It's what made him love her mother.

Raphael let his daughter lead the way as he carried the many bags. He found a spot for two and he let (Y/n) walk towards the restaurant they would eat lunch at. He messed with his phone, texting his wife saying that he's still with his daughter. The woman would take a while waiting in line, so he figured he could have a conversation with her.

(Y/n) returned with a tray of food in her hand. The young woman knew her father like the back of her hand. Whatever she liked, he liked as well. So their orders were practically identical to each other but each plate had its own twist to it. The old man looked up from his phone and beamed. 

"Looks delicious," Raphael spoke.

"Well I hope it tastes delicious too," (Y/n) replied. She sat down in front of her father and gave him his food. The father and his child started eating right away. They were quiet for a bit, as they critiqued the food they ate. They looked at each other, sharing a glance and facial expression.

The food was good after all. 

They two continued to eat, each taking a spoonful of their food. They slowed down after a bit, taking in their choice of drink. They shared a glance for a moment. Another conversation was about to start.

"You know you've grown so much. I remember just seeing you and you were this small kid in front of me," Raphael chuckled, "Now look at you. You've grown into a pretty lady. I'm sure you've caught someone's eye."

"Are you kidding?" (Y/n) asked, "Let me guess, you want grandkids don't you."

"Hey hey hey, I didn't explicitly say that." The old man sipped his drink, his (e/c) eyes looking to his daughter's pair. "Come on you're a young woman, you've got to at least have someone in mind."

The woman thought about it. Her mind started drifting to the people that she's met over her life. Most of the people she's seen so far were friends. Fondness, yes, but attraction, no.

"No one, so far, dad." The (h/c) haired woman sighed, swirling his drink. 

Raphael nodded and smiled at her. It will take some time for a lucky person to come into her life. He knew it would. If it took him a while to find that special someone, albeit twice, it will for her. He knew not to rush, but of course, like any other parent, his desire for grandkids was really strong. 

"Well hurry it up, I want grandkids," Raphael chuckled. He had said it in a tone that meant that he wasn't at all that serious. The old man pushed his graying hair off of his face as he sighed. His eyes connected with his daughter's once more.

"But in all seriousness, don't rush love. It'll eventually come to you if you've been hoping. That lucky person will eventually come into your life, just like how your two moms came into mine, and trust me, goodness, they realization will blow you away." Raphael sipped his drink, almost downing the remaining contents.

(Y/n) only nodded, smiling at her father. She knew how he felt and she couldn't help but laugh lightly. "I know, I know. How many times have you given me this sort of lecture?"

"Lecture? This is hardly a lecture. If you want a lecture, go ask your mom," Raphael snickered. 

The two finished eating their food, cleaned up their table, and gathered their things. The father and daughter only stayed in the mall for a few hours, before they retreated back to the car. As Raphael placed their belongings in the trunk, (Y/n) browsed through her phone. She texted a few friends, most were work and close friends before she returned her attention to her father.

He sent her a smile before he looked ahead. He started the car and drove off. (Y/n) assumes it was back to her home. The drive back to her house was rather quiet, but the two found comfort in the silence. Eventually, (Y/n) had turned on the radio, as it was absent earlier. It fills up the air just a bit. The woman started to softly hum along to the music that played.

After a few minutes, (Y/n) started talking.

"Hey dad," (Y/n) said, "Did any of my grandparents ever fight in some war?"

"War?" Raphael mumbled, "There was your granddad that fought in the second world war for Allied forces. Not sure about your mom's side though. Why do you ask?"

"Nothing," (Y/n) sighed.

Her father arched a brow. "You know I'm not going to take nothing as an answer, especially since that question just came out of nowhere." His lips formed into a frown as he side-eyed his daughter. 

The woman pursed her lips together as she looked away from him. "Well," (Y/n) whispered, "I found a box of letters and they're dated...they're dated back to 1940s. You know, when the war was happening." She found it hard to speak for some reason. She wasn't sure why. She gently messed with her arms as she tried to find words. Raphael gave her time. He knew she needed it. 

Taking in a deep breath, she spoke again. "The letters are from a guy named Jones. I don't know his first name. I only know his last name because that's the sender's name. The letters were never opened and just kept in the house in the box and they were hiding under the closet in my room."

"Let me guess...you opened them," Raphael commented.

"Yeah," (Y/n) breathed out. 

"You just unleashed a curse," the old man teased, laughing a little. 

"Uh-huh. There's a curse on the house now I guess, and ooooh, a ghost is haunting me now," (Y/n) snickered. She shook her head, feeling a bit better that she got a laugh out. "But seriously, the letters are kinda weird. They're like...love letters or something. Well! Not really like those old love letters that Shakespeare might write or something, but you know, some sappy stuff. I just have this guy's letters to his sweetheart saying that he's excited to start a life with her."

"Did you open all of the letters?" He asked. 

"N-No. I'm doing this one by one, actually." She replied.

Raphael hummed, "How many letters are there." 

"Enough to read for a year, which is why I'm reading one each day." (Y/n) brushed her hair with her hands. "I wanted to ask if granddad had like...some sort of friend named Jones, but thinking about it now, he probably wouldn't have."

"Jones you said?" Raphael asked, "I dunno if your grandpa did have someone like that. We can't exactly ask a corpse you know." 

"That's kinda grim," (Y/n) softly laughed.

"But, hey, I'll look into it. I can't exactly just go off of his initials or his last name but I wanna help you out." With a free hand, Raphael gently nudged his daughter. They shared a small smile. 

For the rest of the ride, it was quiet. Raphael pulled up on (Y/n)'s driveway and made his way to the trunk. He didn't help his kid out of the car this time because she had to open the door. A cold gust went through (Y/n), making her shiver. The cold lingered until she moved to flick the lights on. She called her father over and asked him to place the shopping bags on the living room floor. The young lady thanked him before seeing him out the door. 

"Hey stay safe alright?" Raphael mumbled. He gently pulled his daughter into a hug. (Y/n) hugged back as well. 

"I will, dad." The two pulled away and the old man retreated back to his car. (Y/n) watched as her father drove away from her home. She lingered at the front door again, feeling a gust of cold wind wrap around her form. There it was again.

Seriously, what's with this house and it being so cold. 

(Y/n) shrugged her shoulders and went back inside her home, where she stayed for the rest of the day. She did what she could to pass the day. She didn't want to think about the faceless soldier for the remainder of the day. Later at night, (Y/n) found herself staring at her bedroom ceiling. Her mind wandered, peeking into thoughts that drifted. It lingered on one.

Jones. 

"You played baseball, surely that'll give me something," (Y/n) murmured to herself, "But then again, that doesn't shorten the list at all. In fact, I bet there are a shit ton of kids with the last name of Jones and played baseball back then." The woman rubbed her eyes as she turned her body.

Softly she sighed. "I feel like I'm chasing someone who doesn't exist. That's probably the case. Maybe this is just some prank from the past owners."

Even if it was, would she stop? No. She doesn't think she will. 

The woman drifted off to sleep after she had cleared her mind. The moon gave her company for the evening, giving cool light to her covered form. Soon the morning came and ripped the moon from the sky. Brightly the sun shined. It was a new day, and a new day meant a new letter.

(Y/n) had done the usual morning routine and found herself drifting to her bed, her hands already making their way to grab the box that hid underneath. She opened it gently and plucked an envelope. This marks the 23rd letter. 

Good morning babe! I know I didn't write to you for a few days but that's only because we ran out of paper at the base for a while. Some guy was using a lot of the papers to just burn them. What kind of idiot does that? Hey, I may be using a lot of the papers right now, but that's because I've been sending letters to you and ma and pa. I only have a few papers to fill up, so I'm sorry of all the words seem crammed together. I just don't want to write less to you and my folks back at home. Anyway, I'd say I'm feeling pretty good today! Some guy managed to get a few comic books from this bookstore and he brought them back to base. I'd say that it's a feat. I haven't seen comic books in a while and I'm honestly really glad that someone managed to get them in the base! I was super stoked when the guy gave me this special edition of Captain America. Even the boys laughed at me when they saw my face. They said I looked like some kid who just got their first baseball card.  Does that sound too childish? If it does, then well, that's just another part to love about me then! I'm not forcing you to love that though, it's just maybe you can learn to love it. Hey if you don't really like comics, that's ok. I don't adore you any less than I do now.  The Captain America comic was super cool though. It showed Captain America beating some soldiers down with his shield! He was saving people too. I wanna be as cool as him. Hell, I'm trying to be as cool as him! Being a hero is definitely in style right now, and right now babe I'm going to try and be that kind of hero you can look up to!  I told Ma and Pa about the comic book thing already in their letter. I bet they'll even mention how they imagine my expression. They're probably going to compare it to the time they gave me this super limited edition baseball card for my birthday.  Once I come home, I'm going to try and see if I can find the exact same Captain America comic and probably save it with my comic book collection back at home. Hey, can I ask a favor babe? I know you're at home right now and I don't know if you like comics or not, but if you can, can you start collecting Captain America comics for me? I can't grow my collection if I'm not there. I'll try and make it up to you I swear! With a lot of hugs and kisses and money too, if you want. Thank you in advance! Continue to take care of yourself out there, babe. From your superheroic and super cool boyfriend, A. F. J.

(Y/n) kept an amused smile on her face as she read the letter. Her brain's gears turn, processing everything he said. He was a comic book nerd and even called himself childish for it. Oh if he were to live in this era right now, he would probably blend in with people who collect manga and the rest of the comic book lovers. He definitely is starting to sound like he could fit in with society right now. 

Other than the idea of Jones living in this time, another thought appeared. There were so many things that Jones didn't know about his girlfriend. He doesn't know if she liked pets, sports, or comics. Shouldn't they have talked about their mutual interests before they started dating? 

Maybe their relationship was just a spur-of-the-moment thing, where Jones told his girlfriend that he was going to war. In turn, they would start dating for a short period of time before he was sent off. 

Oh, the thought was horrible. Being together and then immediately getting pulled apart. The woman has to wonder though, did the girlfriend really love Jones as much as he loved her? He hasn't said that he loved her just yet. Maybe they weren't really in love.

(Y/n)'s lips arched into a frown. Everything her mind just proceeded. It was all terrible. The poor soldier.

She shook off her thoughts and sighed. She knew if she thought about it more, her mood might drop. She mumbled softly to herself as she stood up and tucked the opened letter in the drawer. She looked at it and hummed. 

"Jones," she whispered to herself, "whoever your baby was, I'm sure she loved everything you mentioned." It was words of assurance to someone she doesn't even know. Someone she knew was dead. It helped her, though, as she was found softly smiling again. (Y/n) drifted away from her room for the rest of the day, her mind still stuck on the faceless soldier.

[thesquidkid]

Through the clouds, I see love shine

Little fic for @unbearable22, thank you for putting this song in my head while I was doing homework 😆 Hope you enjoy! (Read on AO3)

In my life, there's been heartache and pain

I don't know if I can face it again

Can't stop now, I've traveled so far

To change this lonely life

Michael was sitting on the bed of his truck, leaning his weight on his left arm, legs slightly crossed so he could fit. His hat was off, the fingers on his right hand playing with its hem. He was looking at the man in front of him, who was leaning his back against the truck, a laptop positioned on his thighs. Alex looked peaceful, even if nothing about this situation brought peace, the features on his face were relaxed.

They were somewhere in the mountains where Michael had driven them, following a certain signal, stopping every once in a while under a radio post, allowing Alex to connect the Lockhart machine to the post and observe the frequencies and code something that would lead to understanding the machine better. They had talked about the machine some more after Michael had been allowed into Deep Sky to get a look at it, Alex focusing more on the informatic part of it, whereas Michael was more interested in the mechanics and the alien tech used.

This time, their stop was quite long, Alex seemingly having found what he was looking for. In reality, they both knew that Alex could’ve done this all alone, it didn’t require any of Michael’s special skills, they weren’t after Jones or anyone, anything, particularly dangerous. They were just after radio signals for the Lockhart machine. But the fact that Alex had asked Michael to accompany him meant a lot to the both of them and so they drove away from Roswell.

When they were driving they would mostly talk about the machine, about the different theories they had. But once they stopped, Alex would take his computer out and Michael would sit silently, either next to him, or in front of him, and would think. He would think of Alex, of them together.

They didn’t really get a chance to properly talk after the kiss. They did talk about their relationship, and had agreed not to fall back into old habits. But, then, Alex had gotten Michael clearance to get into Deep Sky and the machine had been their main focus.

“Michael?” Alex said, with a smile. Michael realised that he probably had been talking and stopped seeing that Michael wasn’t paying attention.

“Huh,” Michael asked, bringing his thoughts back to the present, “sorry, you were saying?”

“Are you okay?” Alex asked instead, putting his computer to the side, his entire attention on Michael.

Michael breathed out deeply, gathering his thoughts before answering. They both were making efforts on communication, and Michael wasn’t going to stop there. “I, uh, I don’t want to mess this up,” he said with a faint smile, looking back up at Alex.

“I’m guessing you’re not talking about this very boring mission,” he said, with a smile, closing his laptop and waving to Michael to sit next to him.

Michael scooped himself up smiling back at Alex and sat down next to him, turning his upper body so that they were still facing.

“I don’t want to mess us up either,” said Alex once Michael had stopped moving.

“So what do we do then?” asked Michael, his voice low, barely a whisper, feeling like if maybe he said it louder it would curse them. “Because I know we can do better Alex, I know we can be together without hurting each other.” He breathed deeply and blinked a few times, feeling his eyes sting with the beginning of tears. “I am done with all the pain and heartbreak in my life, I just want to love you, freely.”

He raised his head, as if it was a challenge to the universe. Alex put his hand to Michael’s cheek, wiping the tears there with his thumb, ignoring his own. Michael however, not one to ignore Alex’s emotions, brought his hand to mirror the gesture, bumping their arms and making them laugh a bit, before it died down, and they were back in the current time, in the current conversation.

“I think,” started Alex, “that out of the two of us you’re the one with more experience with free love.” Michael shrugged at that, and Alex decided to move on, neither wanting to reminisce about the past, but rather choosing to look towards the future, their future. “I want you to show me what it’s like, Michael. I want to experience everything with you. I want-” he cut himself with a breath, “I want to know what it’s like to not be scared of loving you, Michael.”

They stared at each other, only now realising that it was the first time either of them said that word in present tense. I love you. Three words that for the longest time have been unspoken between them, and finally, breached the surface.

“And as for what we should do,” Alex continued with a sniff, “how about we start with dinner?” he asked, looking into Michael’s eyes.

“Your place or mine?” replied Michael, with a breathless chuckle.

“How about the Roadrunner Cafe? We could definitely make it there for 8 tonight,” Alex replied with a nervous chuckle. The Roadrunner wasn’t so different to the Crashdown - less good quality, obviously - and it wasn’t something too fancy. But it was different. It felt more important somehow, like there was no mistaking in what Alex meant. Not dinner as ‘friends’, but dinner as boyfriends.

Michael looked at him with a smile, “I don’t know about you but I’d probably feel bad, you know? Cheating on Arturo like that.”

Alex laughed at that, “Fair enough, rumors go around quickly in this town.” He looked at Michael with so much softness in his eyes, his face and his body relaxed, that Michael needed to actively fight his instincts, not to jump Alex and kiss him, right here and there, but he also knew that they couldn’t fall back into who they were before. Not if they wanted them to work out. And judging by the way Alex cleared his throat, looking pointedly at Michael’s lips, he would say he wasn’t the only one in that state.

“So, it’s a date, huh?” Michael asked, wanting to make sure they were clear, on the same page, before they did anything else. “Us, tonight at the Crashdown. And not as friends, right?”

Alex chuckled and leaned closer, “I mean I thought we were friends.” At Michael’s teasing raised eyebrow, he quickly added, “but yes, tonight we’re having dinner in the best place in town, as boyfriends.”

As Alex talked, he leaned in closer and closer, until the final word was whispered, Michael feeling it more than hearing it, the two men crashing their mouths together. But unlike all the times they kissed in the last decade, until the night at the Wild Pony, that kiss was slow. Still burning like fire, but without an expiration date.

In the end, they drove back into Roswell, and parked outside the Crashdown. From the moment they walked out Michael’s truck, until they sat down at a booth, their fingers were intertwined. And once they were seated, their bodies touching, from shoulder to knee, Alex on Michael’s left. They knew that people were looking at them, but neither cared. They were too busy getting to know what being loved felt like.

I wanna know what love is

I want you to show me

I wanna feel what love is

I know you can show me

[spaceskam]

woke me up from the longest dream

Summary: Alex and Michael follow up on a lead and find something powerful.

Tags: canon compliant (for the most part), visions, road trips, my deep sky still sucks agenda

ao3

"Why is it so fucking cold?" 

"Welcome to Montana," Alex said dryly.

Michael made a face and shoved his hands in his pockets. He was doing his best to be mature about Alex inviting him on this trip. It was another loose lead he found and he was irritated that he didn't find it until after he came back home. Michael had offered to help after a grueling time in self-induced misery and Alex had agreed and he had planned to use this time to show Alex how much he'd grown.

However, there was something about being alone with Alex that made him feel a little like he hadn’t. 

"Are you not cold?"

"Didn't we deduce that your species is from a really cold planet due to your body temperature and the clothing Tripp described they were wearing?" Alex asked back.

Michael was used to a vaguely snarky Alex, it was in his genetic makeup. This was a different level though. Alex was in one of the worst moods Michael had ever seen him in that didn't result in a fight, instead it was all icy silence and irritated answers. Michael wasn't sure if it was because of his breakup with Forrest or if it was something else entirely. Maybe it was the fact that Michael was here at all.

He decided to keep quiet.

"You got me," Michael said, taking slightly bigger strides to keep up with Alex.

They were in a small town that served as a hub for a few even smaller towns that surrounded it. It had one small stretch of road with all the local businesses in it, a shabby hotel, a diner, and a farmer's market being the three biggest options. There were a couple others buildings, but Michael couldn't say what they were by just looking at them from the outside.

Alex seemed to know where he was headed though and he waltzed up to a building that was only identifiable by a sign that was meant to say CORRIE'S but was missing a few letters and said CORE instead. He pushed the door open and Michael followed. The inside had the heater blasting in a way that immediately smothered him, but he managed to keep his face even. It looked like a convenience store with only three rows of shelves in the middle. A sign at the back door read GAS PUMP IN BACK. Michael thought that was bad advertising.

"Hello," an older woman at the counter greeted. She seemed to be the only one here.

"Hey," Alex said, approaching her and turning on an easy smile. Logically Michael just knew he was being charming to get what he came here for. Illogically, it felt like Alex could be nice to everyone but him.

How many times could he tell himself to grow up? 

"What can I help you two with?" she asked. 

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but this place is owned by someone who used to live in Fort Belknap?" Alex said, not even beating around the bush to charm her more. That was the only thing to convince him it wasn't just him. 

The woman stared at him, face unchanging. 

"Who's asking?" 

"Holt," Alex said, smiling and tilting his head a little bit, "Carla Holt, to be more specific."

She breathed in and closed her eyes for a moment before opening them a few moments later. 

"Their timing has always been impeccable," she said, gesturing towards a door behind her, "Come."

"Who's Carla Holt?" Michael whispered to him as they followed. Alex grabbed his arm and squeezed, nearly causing Michael to fully trip over air. 

"Just follow my lead. Stay quiet," Alex explained quietly, "I'll tell you later."

And Michael did as he said. 

"You must be the littlest Manes boy," the woman said as she led them into a little office. It was cluttered and didn't really seem like the top secret place Michael was imagining. 

"Yes, ma'am." 

"Corrie," she corrected, "I never did like the sound of ma'am."

"Alright," Alex said, laughing lightly even though didn't reach his eyes, "My mother told me the same thing." 

"I bet so," Corrie said, digging through messy drawers of a desk. She sat down heavily into the beat up chair and started digging through a file cabinet. "I kept telling myself it'll eventually come and bite me in the ass, carrying secrets for someone I only hear from once every few years, but you never know what you're getting yourself into until after you're stuck."

"Yeah, I know how that feels," Alex sighed. Michael's eyes drifted to him. He avoided eye contact completely.

"I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting you. Your brother, maybe. Part of me expected your father to bust down my door more than anyone," she went on. Corrie pulled out a small box and opened it, looking in and making a face before closing it and tossing it over her shoulder. 

"Guess I'm the sucker who agreed to clean up duty."

Corrie laughed.

Truly, Michael expected more danger and more difficulty. He expected a fight or at least tension. Instead, Alex and Corrie made small talk about their shitty affiliations while Corrie dug through decades worth of clutter. Eventually, she pulled out a box and opened it and took a deep breath. She closed it again before giving it to Alex and Alex didn't reopen it so Michael had no idea what was in it. All he knew was that it went into Alex's bag.

"Thank you "

"Keep it safe," Corrie said, "Keep yourself safe." Then for the first time her eyes drifted to Michael. "You too. There aren't many of you left."

It was hot in the building, but somehow Michael felt like he'd jumped in ice water.

"Thank you."

"Mhm. Now get the hell out of my store before somebody follows you."

"Of course. Thank you again," Alex said politely and then he did as she said, turning on his heel and walking away. Michael wanted to stay and ask more–if she knew what he was, maybe she knew things he didn't and they could get rid of Mr. Jones–but Michael simply followed Alex's lead.

"Alex," Michael said, nearly having to jog to keep up. Alex opened the door of the store and a blast of cold hit Michael in the face, colder than before due to the extreme warmth inside. It took him a moment to reboot his mind enough to finish what he was saying. "Alex, what's in the box?"

Alex managed to close his eyes and shake his head in disapproval without slowing his pace. 

"Can you wait until we get to the hotel?" Alex asked, cold again. Michael nodded despite the fact Alex couldn't see him, deciding that a verbal answer probably would be annoying in itself. 

The problem with silence was that it was a sure way to get Michael to spiral. He had discovered very recently that being alone when he wanted to be alone the most was the worst idea. Now, he didn't want to be alone as much as he wanted answers. Walking in silence down a street while wondering what was in Alex's bag, who Carla Holt was, why Alex was angry, etc, etc, etc, was only making his mind race.

By the time they stepped into the lobby of the hotel, Michael was sure that Alex had just borrowed a bomb from an old lady and he was going to explode himself and whoever Carla Holt was was going to hunt Michael down in revenge. He of course didn't say that. Instead, he tapped his foot as Alex requested a room with two queens and didn't realized that the worker snorted because he was assuming they were two queens until after they were already heading to the room. 

"Should I go spit in his drink?" Michael asked when he realized. 

"No," Alex said, "You'd probably make it taste too sweet."

Michael again found himself stumbling over nothing and he looked at Alex, wondering what the hell was he talking about. But it was the nicest thing he'd said to him the whole trip and Michael decided to take it very personally. 

"You sayin' I'm sweet?" Michael asked, grinning. A smile pulled at Alex's mouth that he very quickly schooled, slowing as he came to their room. 

"I'm saying your saliva, and probably your other bodily fluids, have a higher concentration of a glucose-like chemical," Alex said, "As proved by Kyle and Liz when we got drunk."

"You guys drunkenly tested our saliva's glucose levels?" Michael asked, laughing a little. Alex finally speaking to him made his brain stop wandering as much. Not completely–he was still wondering about that box–but enough.

"We were talking," Alex said, unlocking the door with the keycard, "And noticed we all thought you three tasted sweeter than other people we'd kissed and, well, you know. So we did some tests."

"That's... Interesting," Michael said, letting the door close behind them.

Alex walked over to the bed closest to the door and carefully sat his bag down. Michael watched him, staying near the door. He was still unsure about where they stood. He knew Alex cared about him and he knew Alex didn't hate him, but he was also still holding him at arm's length. And then there was that box. He didn't want to push.

But Michael wasn't known for his patience. 

"Alex," Michael said, "What's in that box?"

Alex swallowed and looked up at him for a moment before patting the bed beside him. An invitation. One that made Michael's stomach drop and twist in 11 knots. But he walked closer, sitting beside Alex. Alex stared at him, his features slowly loosening up to betray his feelings. His eyebrows pulled together in that kind of worry that meant he felt like he was drowning, scrambling to pull himself to the surface and never able to get a good grip. Which would explain the coldness, he supposed.

"You know you can trust me, right? I'm... I'm working on not being so self-destructive, and, like, knowing I'm helping you out kinda helps when I feel shitty," Michael said. Alex huffed a small laugh and shook his head, dropping his chin to his chest for a moment. When he looked Michael in the eye again, he was back to being serious. 

"I did something stupid," Alex said, softly like it was a secret, "I agreed to something without knowing what I was getting myself into. And I'm kind of stuck right now."

"Stuck? What do you mean stuck?" Michael said, following his lead and whispering.

"I'm figuring it out, alright? Don't worry. I'll tell you later," Alex said, reaching out to squeeze his arm before dropping it back to the bed, "And I checked before we even left that I wasn't bugged and I've kept my eye out to know that we aren't being followed. And my computer definitely isn't. We're good. They're tracking me, but only to the extent I'm letting them. It's okay." 

"That doesn't sound okay," Michael said.

"Trust me like I trust you, alright?" He said. Michael reluctantly nodded. "I need you to hold something for me."

Michael blinked. "The box."

"Yeah."

"Who's Carla Holt?" Michael asked. Alex smiled softly

"It's not a who, it's a what. It's a code from my mom's side of things. She knows more about the alien shit than she let on," Alex sighed, "I didn't stand a fucking chance not being involved with this shit. My dad, my mom, you. So, you know, if you ever feel bad about that, it's my fucking destiny." 

Michael swallowed and nodded, feeling more eager by the second to know what was in that box. Needed to keep hearing Alex say how fated they were to know each other. Needed Alex to touch his arm again and smile.

"Okay," Michael said, trying to stay in his own space, "So we're fated. Cosmic connection. Called it."

Alex broke into a wide smile, genuine and welcoming as he shoved Michael's shoulder gently. "Shut up."

"Show me," Michael said instead. Alex's smile faded just a little.

"Do me a favor and double check our surroundings," Alex said. Michael nodded and tilted his head, sending a chair to lodge itself under the doorknob and pressed the curtains tightly to the wall. His eyes slid closed as he did a mental sweep of the building, not noticing anything out of order. When he opened his eyes again, Alex seemed to be closer. "Thanks." 

"Show me." 

Alex sighed and nodded, hesitantly reaching into his bag and pulling out the box. It was clear now that it was made of really nice wood, intricate carvings covering it. Alex handled it with an extreme care that Corrie didn't have with it. His eyes flickered between the box and Michael a few dozen times before he hesitantly opened it and Michael leaned closer to see.

"It's just a ring," Michael said, almost disappointed. It looked like a normal, silver band that was old and unpolished after years of being tucked away. 

"Not just a ring," Alex said, he kept his fingers very precise as he picked it up. Michael didn't miss the way it seemed to ripple at his touch.

"Something alien," Michael acknowledged.

"Something alien," Alex confirmed, "Most of the glass and even the rocks that you've had so far all seem to be crafted and at least heavily altered by your people to be as useful as they are. This... This was passed down as a pure substance that was mined and cut into a wedding band to mimic human customs." Alex looked at him. "It pre-dates your mother landing here, Michael."

Michael let out a shaky breath, eager and hungry for knowledge for the first time in a long time. He'd poured over Tripp's journal over and over, poured over Caulfield and Project Shepard records, all of it painful and sickening with an unhappy ending. And now there was something new– old –that might actually give him something more. Proof that aliens were here before his mother, proof that there was a reason they came to Earth of all places. More secrets he craved to uncover. He missed the feeling. 

"It's powerful and, as far as I can tell, the last of it left. The rest was probably destroyed with your planet. But it's old and... and sentimental. One of the older women on the reservation told me the sentimentality powered it more. Because it's not just a ring that symbolizes love or a bond between two people, but it's a new start. Blending the past they chose to leave behind together with something new and different. Safer and secure. Together," Alex said. Michael swallowed, eyes unable to break away from Alex's. Alex cleared his throat and looked back down at it. "That's what she said anyway. There was probably two at one point, but I'm sure the other is lost to time."

"Yeah, okay. Okay," Michael said, agreeing without hesitation, "I'll take care of it and keep it safe."

He went to grab it, but Alex pulled it out of his reach.

"Michael," he said, "When I say it's powerful, I mean the moment you put it on, something's going to… happen."

Michael hadn't really intended to put it on, but it seemed Alex knew him well enough to know that eventually he would. 

"What kind of something?" 

"I don't know, Michael. I just know legend says it has unspeakable levels of power. So, please, be careful with it. I'd prefer you do it with someone around in case it overloads you or something," Alex said. Michael didn't point out what Isobel had before–he was the only one who didn't have a limit.

"Why not just put it on right now?" Michael said, "We're in the clear and you're here. Why not?" 

Alex breathed in and out, staring at him with that same worried, downing look. Michael selfishly enjoyed it for a few moments–enjoying that he cared that much. So he smirked and held out his left hand, feeling confident.

"Go ahead, Alex. Put a ring on it," he said. A smile pulled at Alex's lips that he fought, but he relaxed his shoulders and grabbed Michael's hand with his empty one.

Alex's hand was warm. Michael was sort of obsessed with the feeling of it. Why hadn't they been holding hands this entire time? 

"I'm right here, okay? So if you need me to take it off or if you feel like you're going to lose control, let me know. Try not to throw me," Alex said. Michael rolled his eyes.

"I don't give a shit how much power I have injected into me, I'm not going to hurt you," Michael said. Alex raised an eyebrow. "Physically. Come on now, cut me some slack."

"Maybe," Alex said, putting the ring closer. Michael could feel it now that it was millimeters away from his skin, the power of it overwhelming. And Michael was intrigued. "Ready?"

"Always."

Alex slid the ring onto his ring finger.

The wave of power hit him instantly and, before he could adjust, sent him into a mindscape. Or–he thought it was. The room was damp and dark, unwelcoming. Michael looked around for something, someone, but he was alone. It was crowded with things, though, inventions and technological structures. It looked like his own lair but significantly less familiar, less comforting. 

“Michael?”

Michael turned towards the voice and saw Alex at the top of a ladder, staring down at him with a face that said he was doing everything to stay calm. He had red stains on his clothes. Michael stared at him, unsure what to do. Alex was down the ladder and centimeters away from him so quickly that it could only be achieved by him seeing something that wasn’t happening just yet.

“Are you okay?” Alex asked, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” Michael said, instinctually, “Where are we? What is this place?”

Alex looked around the room, his face betraying his pain before he met Michael’s eyes again. Then his hand was on Michael’s cheek with a warm and grounding presence. Michael’s heart was about to burst out of his chest.

“My research,” he sighed, “Half of it’s destroyed anyway. Let’s go.” Michael didn’t really think that sounded right. This didn’t feel like Alex’s space. He’d been in enough of Alex’s spaces before to know what they felt like. This wasn’t it.

“Your research?” he said. Alex gave him a look and stroked his thumb over his cheekbone.

“I’ll tell you later.”

“Stop that,” Michael said, his voice sounding more irritated than he meant. He could feel the anger in his body, but he didn’t know the source. “Stop not telling me things. You keep doing that. You need to tell me.”

“You’re right,” Alex agreed, swallowing, “But we need to get out of here. I swear I’ll tell you once we get in the car. But we need to get out of here.”

“You promise you’ll tell me in the car?” Michael said. Alex nodded.

“I promise.”

They were upstairs just as fast as Alex had been downstairs. Michael saw blood. He turned his head to find the source, but Alex’s hand was back on his neck to stop him.

“Don’t look. Let’s just go to the car.”

“What, you tryna baby me?” Michael asked, “You know I’ve seen some shit.”

“Yeah, I know,” Alex said, still leading him towards the door as his thumb dug slightly into the muscle on his neck, “Doesn’t mean I have to show you more.”

Michael sucked in a breath and he was thrown back into his body, the power from the ring still thrumming through him and teasing a possible second surge. It was old and unused and desperate to stretch out some of it's pent up energy.

Alex was there, staring at him and holding onto him. He was so close, so real, and so was that memory that was just in the opposite direction. Michael stared at him, taking him in.

"What happened?" Alex asked, hands squeezing his biceps. His hand started to slide up, but stopped at his shoulder. "Hey, you with me?" 

"Yeah," Michael said, "I'm okay."

"What happened?"

"I think, uh," Michael breathed, swallowing. His throat felt dry again. The heat of the hotel seemed to work with the heat inside him; he was on fire in the best way. "I got, like, That's So Raven'd."

Alex blinked a couple times, his thumb moving in slow circles against his collarbone not too far from where it’d been moments ago in his vision. Michael wanted to let his eyes roll back into his head and just sink into the bed with Alex beside him and let this undeniable strength course through him.

"You saw the future?" he said, "Like one of Maria's visions?" 

"I think so," Michael confirmed, "Only… mine wasn't of something bad. I mean, not really, anyway."

"What was it?" Alex asked. 

Michael licked his lips, studying Alex for a moment. The ring on his finger fit perfectly as if it was made for him. The power it gave settled nicely in him, pulsing and eager to be used just a little bit more, but in a childish, playful way. It wanted to stretch after too many years being cooped up.

"Hey, I'm going to try to see something else," Michael said. Alex's eyes went wide as saucers.

"What? Tell me what you saw the first time," Alex pressed, his hand shifting just enough to cup the side of his neck. Michael layered his hand over his, feeling bold and unperturbed. At some point, they were going to get there. He was sure of that more now than ever. 

And he wanted to see more.

" Michael ," Alex said, but Michael closed his eyes and breathed in, letting the power in the ring take him somewhere else.

And he was somewhere else. 

He was standing at the end of a driveway. He looked around and tried to grab some sort of identifier, but all he saw was a house behind him and then a school bus headed towards him. It stopped in front of him, a kid stepping off and running towards him with a backpack almost as big as she was. 

"Daddy!" the kid yelled and Michael tried his damnedest to act like he was meant to be here as the little body slammed against his legs for a welcoming hug. "Is Dad home yet? Can you tell him to get ice cream? I think we need ice cream."

"Oh, you think we need it?" Michael asked, walking with the kid towards the house. It felt natural, oddly enough. 

"Yes," the kid said simply, running towards the door. She threw it open and Michael laughed and jogged the rest of the way. He could hear her already telling a story about school and he was trying to stay close enough to follow.

He walked into a foyer, pictures lining the wall. Family portraits.

Him and Alex. The three of them.

When Michael came back to his senses, Alex was right there again and staring at him without faltering. The ring was still alive, but it was at a sated hum now that it had been used a few times. He wondered how it would feel doing something he understood. He couldn’t wait to try.

“Hey,” Alex said, soft and comforting as he welcomed his weight. The vision he had was definitely not what he was looking for, he wanted to know more about Alex’s research and why it all felt so wrong and where the hell they were, but the second one… 

“Hi,” Michael said, breathing and his eyes drifting down to his lips. Michael had experienced a lot of urges to kiss Alex before. Somehow this felt more dire.

“Please don’t do that again,” Alex said, “Maybe we should take it off.”

Michael shook his head carefully, eyes scanning him, “No, it feels fine now. It just needed to be used after being in a little box for decades. It’s good. Feels good.”

“Okay,” Alex said, still clearly hesitant. His fingers played with the hair at the back of Michael’s neck. There were two beds, but Michael was trying to figure out how to convince him to share one. They could fit. They’d shared smaller. “What’d you see?”

Michael breathed deep, wanting to get closer. He kept his hands to himself no matter how much he wanted to touch. He was being good. To get to where those visions said he was headed, he had to be good. Good for himself and Alex.

“Tell me what’s going on,” Michael said softly, “What are you researching? Who are you working with?”

Alex blinked once, twice before dropping his hand off of Michael. Which definitely hurt, but the fact that Alex didn’t move away definitely helped. 

“What did you see?” Alex asked again, more pressing, “I know you saw that I’m researching something.”

Michael shrugged. He technically did, but he didn’t see anything identifiable. He didn’t know what it was. He would like to. Then again, he’d always wanted to know everything about Alex Manes.

“I didn’t see what,” Michael said, “I just saw that someone’s going to fuck with it. I think. I don’t know, we were in this basement looking thing and it felt really off and, and not like you, but you said your stuff was in it. And you had blood on you and when we went upstairs, there was more blood. But you said not to look. I don’t know what you did or what happened, but, like, if you told me, maybe we can prevent it getting that extreme.”

Alex stared at him for a long moment. 

“You saw that both times?” Alex asked softly. Michael hesitated before shaking his head. “What else did you see, then?”

“Um,” Michael breathed, trying to think of the right words to say, “Uh. I don’t think, um…”

“ Michael.”

“Family portraits,” he said carefully, figuring that was easier to start with than a whole person who called them dad, “Like, ours. Um. I know we don’t belong in suburbia, but I guess we fucking get it anyway.”

He laughed. It wasn’t funny, but it was easier to say it like it was a joke. Alex looked at him, face confused.

“Suburbia? Like. White picket fence kinda thing?” Alex asked. Michael took a slow breath.

“I, uh, I didn’t see a fence, I was too focused on the‒” he stopped, licking his lips. Michael rubbed his thumb over the ring. It seemed to purr at the attention. Michael couldn’t wait to get back home and see what he could really do.

“On the what?” Alex prodded, reaching out to rest his hand on his leg and reigniting the contact. It felt so good. Michael really liked when he was touchy, it was his favorite thing about Alex.

“Um,” Michael breathed, feeling drunk off the attention and the ring all at once. He thought about lying, maybe that they were babysitting because that was close enough, but he was so tired of lies and half-truths and I’ll-tell-you-laters. “On the kid.”

Alex froze for a moment, “The kid?”

“Yeah,” Michael said, shrugging softly, “I, uh, I guess she was ours. She was calling us dad. Do we have any water? My throat is super dry.”

“I… I don’t think you’re seeing the future then, I’m never having kids. Do you realize how awful of a parent I would be? Awful. Neglectful. That’s not… And after I clearly fucking hurt people?”

“Maybe not,” Michael said, not about to argue right now. He was too busy feeling good. Alex kept his hand on his knee. “But whatever it was, it was good.”

Alex stared at him, quiet and clearly thinking things through. Michael let him. It was easier to give him space and time now. He’d gotten better at it before his visions, but they solidified to him that they were on a good path. It felt like they were making good choices and taking good steps. This was just a part of it.

Alex eventually took a deep breath, looked him in the eye.

“I’m gonna tell you what I’m doing, but you have to promise you’re going to stay out of it and trust me,” Alex said, “You promise?”

“I promise.”

“And you’re gonna promise to be honest with me?” Alex said, “And stay safe. Like, seriously. Don’t be reckless just because. I know you.”

I know you.

“Yeah. I’m doing better now,” Michael said, stretching his hand out, “I am. But I’m… I’m tired of not doing shit together. Doing stuff separately always gets us in shitty situations, Alex, I wanna be a team. Can I be on your team?”

Alex swallowed and moved his hand up, tucking Michael’s hair behind his ear.

“Yeah. Be on my team. Let’s be a team,” Alex said. He shifted and Michael waited patiently, watching him. “Okay, so. Deep Sky. It’s… it’s got some good people, I think, but it’s overall fucked. I don’t trust anyone in there, but it’s where I’m doing my research. Sort of. So I’ll tell you.”

It almost felt too good to be true to hear, but he didn’t need the ring to know that Alex was being honest. It showed him anyway. Truthfulness radiated off of him in vibrant blues and whites. He didn’t even need to get in his mindscape to be sure of it. It was strange to feel like that was unnecessary, like his body didn’t need confirmation because it already knew.  It didn’t feel like he was stepping off a ledge. He hoped Alex had the same confidence, wondered what would happen if he put the ring on him.

If Alex still felt like he was stepping off the ledge, he was going to be sure to catch every inch of him this time. No piece would hit the ground like all the times before.

He was going to make this work.

“Everything?” 

“Everything.”

[stayextrafrosty]

All That I Want Is to Finally Be Honest

Summary: 3x09 coda. Michael creates a truth serum in an attempt to help Liz get information out of Jones. He has no one to test it on so he injects himself. Well, he doesn’t expect Alex to come visit. And while they’ve been talking about things more, there’s still stuff Michael needs to say.

A/N: When I say this is porn with feelings… I mean that in the most intense way. The emotions come out full force here. Title taken from the song "Back To U" by SLANDER. This was supposed to be done before 3x10 but alas.

Read on AO3 // Masterlist

-

“I told you, Ortecho. The serum is done but I need to test it. Are you a willing subject?” Michael said as he swirled the liquid in the beaker.

“I told you I’m busy making more of the alien suppressant. Call Isobel. She’s been itching for things to do.” Michael snorted and hung up the phone. He knew she was right. Isobel had been poking her nose into everything Michael and Liz had been working on. She offered to help but there wasn’t a whole lot she could do under the circumstances. But maybe it would be a good idea to put her under oath for a little bit.

He reached for the phone in his pocket, groaning when he saw the ‘no service’ message. This bunker was so hit or miss with it these days. He wished he could send actual thoughts to Isobel as opposed to just feelings over long distances.

Carefully setting the beaker in a holder, he stepped away from the table, wiping the sweat from his palms on his jeans. He climbed up the ladder, pushing the hatch open with his mind. The sun nearly blinded him as cool air whipped around him. He sat himself on the edge of the hole, waiting for his phone to connect again.

As soon as it did, it buzzed a few times as text messages came in. Three separate messages from Isobel spit balling theories and asking if he needed anything from her. He had tried to tell her to get some rest but she was determined to be the one to take Jones down. She had planned a date with some new girl in town but every time Michael asked about it she said there were other things to focus on.

Date.

He and Alex had made plans but of course they got interrupted. By a machine of all things. A machine that made him hallucinate Michael’s mom. Practically throwing every single doubt about them in his mind right back in his face. Alex didn’t want to tell him the full extent of the things she had said. The things he was thinking. Michael understood for the most part. He wasn’t keeping things from him to be cruel. Just the opposite. Alex was trying to protect him. Alex was always protecting him.

Michael sent a quick message back to Isobel about the serum and how he needed help testing it. The phone buzzed again in his hand and he couldn’t help the smile that broke out on his face. He was only thankful Sanders wasn’t around to tease him about it. Alex’s name was at the top of the new message. He tapped the notification to re-open their conversation. He wanted to pretend he didn’t spend the time rereading their conversations since Michael had kissed him. Until then, Michael had thought Alex wasn’t the type to use emojis, but they were being sprinkled throughout more messages.

‘Hope your day is going well’ followed by a blushing smiley face. Michael laughed and shook his head.

‘It would be better if I could see you’ he sent back. He started to climb back down the ladder but his phone buzzed again. He opened the message, being greeted by Alex’s small smile and half lidded eyes as he rested his head on his arm on his desk. He wasn’t fully recovered and Michael could tell. But even with the dark circles, he was still the most beautiful person he had ever seen.

Michael had tried to get him to take a few days off but Alex was insistent. He swore that he would only work on the machine in the way they discussed from now on. And Michael was pretty sure Eduardo was now watching him.

The soft smile still made his heart flutter. This is real. They could casually send pictures of themselves and it wasn’t weird. Michael could see Alex whenever he wanted. And god he loved him. He loved him so much he could jump out of his skin every time he heard his name. There was a twitch in his fingers that told him only to touch Alex. Hold him close and never let go.

“You’re gunna fall if you keep standin’ on the ladder like that!” Michael jumped at Sanders voice. The old man had his eye brow raised and arms crossed as he stood outside of the office trailer.

“Just trying to get some fresh air,” Michael called back as a gust of cold wind whipped through the yard. Sanders shook his head and moved back into the trailer. Michael climbed down the ladder but left the cover off, hoping that would let his phone continue to get service.

He began filling syringes with the serum. His phone buzzed on the table and he briefly glanced at it to see Isobel’s response. She had found something to occupy her time apparently; investigating a lead about where the new alien had disappeared to.

Michael sighed and looked at the needles. He supposed he could just test it on himself. But if it worked properly (which it should) would Sanders really want to listen to all of the stories he had kept secret all this time?

“Guess I don’t have a choice,” he mumbled to himself. Picking up one of the syringes, he watched the green liquid shift. He slipped his flannel off his shoulders, tossing it onto the table. The black t-shirt he wore underneath didn’t do much to keep the cold from the open hatch from sinking in. He pushed a small amount of the serum out of the needle before slipping it into his arm.

“Mad scientists always test on themselves, right?” he asked nobody as he set the empty tube back on the table.

He felt nothing as he walked around the bunker, tapping a pen on the notebook in his hand. Had it really been a bust? Maybe he needed to use more of the powder. He used significantly less than Liz did in her alien killing poison but maybe he needed just a bit more to influence the prefrontal cortex.

He mumbled a curse as he made a note. He didn’t have time to remake this crap a million times. Jones was out there and who knew—

A wave of dizziness washed over him, sending him to his knees. He tried to pull himself up by grabbing the table but the room spun. He missed every attempt to grab the metal edge. Black creeped in at the edge of his vision. He let himself collapse to the floor and he rolled onto his back. Michael fought to keep his eyes open for as long as possible but the promise of sleep was too tempting.

-

“—rin! Guerin! Come on wake up. Don’t you dare leave me now… Michael!”

Alex’s voice was distant, like he was underwater. There was a feint pressure floating across his upper body, poking and prodding. His head radiated pain but it was slowly fading. He began to feel like he was floating as opposed to the hard surface he had been laying on. But at least feeling was starting to return to his body.

“Michael, please. I’m begging you to open your eyes. Twitch your fingers. Scrunch your nose. Anything.” Alex was louder now, as though coming from right above him. He finally oriented himself enough to recognize that his head was elevated. A trembling hand held his own, obviously trying to stop shaking by squeezing harder. Something wet dripped onto his cheek.

“Damnit, Michael!” Alex choked out a sob. Michael summoned all the energy he could and squeezed his hand. He heard Alex gasp above him and then he was squeezing back. Another hand brushed hair off his forehead and traced down the side of his face. Michael would have shuddered at the feeling of his hands but he still didn’t have much movement in his body.

Instead he swallowed and tried to make some kid of sound. Any word that would sooth Alex. He just ended up with a clipped groan. Still Alex seemed to release a sigh of relief.

“Michael. Can you hear me? Are you ok?” Michael just made another strangled sound and gave a barely there squeeze to his hand. He focused his efforts to opening his eyes instead. He wanted to see Alex.

The dim lights above him still felt too bright and everything was blurry. He could vaguely make out the form of Alex’s head bent over him. He blinked a few times, trying to clear the fog in front of his eyes. As his focus sharpened, he met Alex’s wide eyes. Tear tracks stained his cheeks, and a small smile found its way to his lips.

“I’m ok,” Michael managed to croak out. Then Alex was bending down and pressing a gentle kiss to his mouth. Michael would have responded but he was pulling away too soon.

“Wait… do it again,” Michael mumbled. Alex shook his head.

“Let’s at least get you sitting up.” He groaned as Alex lifted his shoulders and helped him turn so he could lean against the counter. Michael noticed his position on his knees. How long had he been sitting like that with his head in his lap? It was probably uncomfortable at best, painful at worst. He moved sluggishly to grab Alex’s arm and pull him off his knees to a sitting position next to him.

“You don’t have to worry about me so much. But I love that you do.” Michael wanted to correct himself. Take back the second part. It was still too soon.

“What happened? Did someone come hurt you?” The new anger in his voice was barely contained. Michael blew extra air out of his nose in a laugh and shook his head.

“No. I stuck myself with a serum I’ve been working on for Liz. I needed a guinea pig and no other alien was around. I think I used too much of the yellow powder and knocked myself out. No big deal.” He reached over to rest a hand on Alex’s thigh and squeezed gently. “There’s no need to be angry. But the fact that you are makes me love you more.” Stop talking! He was screaming at himself.

Alex sucked in a breath and turned his face away, but Michael caught the blush that overtook his cheeks. He let himself slide to the side, resting his own head on Alex’s shoulder. They sat in silence for a moment and the fog in his head continued to clear.

“What kind of serum was it?” Alex asked quietly.

“Supposed to be a truth serum. The idea was that once we over power Jones, we stick him with it and he tells us all the secrets of the universe. How to swap Max and Jones back into their proper bodies. History of our home planet and the War. Stuff about us.” He knew that this was more information than he was asking for but he couldn’t stop talking. “Did you know I’m immune to fire? That was a hell of a discovery. Spent the better part of a day setting my hand on fire to see if it did anything. Never did. There really was an irony in you telling me that you’d burn the world down for me.”

“Michael…”

“Sure you’d burn the world but did you ever consider I would walk through fire for you? That maybe the world is already burning but it doesn’t matter because I can withstand it all. Just for you.”

Suddenly a hand was covering his mouth and Alex was staring at him so intently Michael thought he might be reading his mind. Tears pricked at the edges of his eyes and his breathing was shaky, as though Michael had overwhelmed him.

“I.. think the serum works,” Alex said quietly. Michael wrapped his fingers around his wrist gently, pulling his hand away from his mouth, but not too far.

“I love you, Alex.” He pulled his hand back to his lips, pressing them to his palm. “And I should have said that to you so much earlier.”

Michael could see the way Alex fought against the smile. He breathed out a half laugh and looked anywhere except him.

“Tell me that when you haven’t drugged yourself,” Alex teased gently.

“Alex, I can’t lie.”

“I know. But I want you to tell me when you’re ready.”

Michael kissed his palm again, then moved his hand slowly down his cheek and placed it on the back of his neck. Alex slipped his fingers into his curls, nails scratching lightly at his head.

“I want to kiss you,” Michael said softly, cupping Alex’s jaw and running his thumbs over his cheeks. He let one go just far enough to press against his bottom lip, pulling it down. Alex’s lips parted as his hand threaded through Michael’s hair tightened.

“You don’t have to ask, you know,” he responded, breathless.

Michael couldn’t help the shudder that ran down his spine. He leaned forward, resting his head against Alex, just breathing in the smell of him. He brushed their lips together and Alex gasped. The small sound sent a thrill through Michael. His heart fluttered and his stomach twisted with nerves.

“I want you,” Michael mumbled.

“You’ve got me. I’m not going anywhere.”

His body trembled as the words warmed every part of his body. Need settled between his legs as he rolled himself to straddle Alex’s thighs. His free hand landed on Michael’s hip as the hand in his hair tugged him closer, brushing their lips against each other again.

Michael hadn’t been this nervous about intimacy in years. This was Alex after all. They communicate with bodies and moans. It’s the way they understand each other. They always fit together so well. Filling in the cracks of each other and making something more beautiful than when they were apart.

Alex was the one who closed the distance between them, capturing Michael’s lips, stoking the fire under his skin. He moaned softly, pressing his hips against Alex.

They had kept their kisses chaste since the night at the Pony, neither wanting to rush into this before they knew where they were going. But Michael had been craving Alex for almost three years. To have him wrapped in his arms as sweat eased the movement of their bodies. He didn’t want to wait anymore. He couldn’t.

Alex tugged on his hair with one hand and his t-shirt with the other. Michael’s hands were moving down to the unbuttoned flannel. He shoved it off his shoulders to expose the white shirt underneath. Alex only released him to chuck the shirt somewhere to the side before he was grabbing at the hem of his shirt and pushing it up.

Michael separated for a moment as he gripped Alex’s shoulders, running his fingers over the collar of his shirt. He felt the cool press of metal and remembered the dog tags Alex had taken to wearing.

His mind wandered to the way they would move against Alex’s chest. The way they would intensify the feeling of Michael’s warm fingers as he traced the chain on his skin. He groaned as he also realized that it was something he couldhave.

Michael kissed Alex again, grinding down against him. He wanted to make sure he knew just how badly he wanted him. Alex shoved his hands under his shirt, fingers splayed over his stomach and then moving to his sides and eventually his back. Alex scratched him lightly as he pulled him closer, encouraging the movement of his hips more.

He shuddered and cursed against his lips. He felt like a teenager again. Like he might come undone without even getting their pants off.

“Wait,” Michael mumbled, breathless. Alex pulled away immediately, looking almost scared that he had done something wrong. Michael smiled warmly at him before crushing their lips together one last time. He only held it for a couple seconds before he was pushing himself off the floor. He grabbed Alex’s hands on the way up, using his telekinesis to help lift him to his feet also. Alex looked around, shocked in a way. Michael was a bit startled too. The pollen was supposed to suppress their powers. Maybe the amount he used was too small to have a real effect. Instead of pointing this out, Michael just chuckled and pushed Alex back against the edge of the counter, head dipping to place wet kisses over his neck.

“Come to my trailer,” he said against his throat. “If I’m going to show you just how much I love you, I’ll at least do it in a proper bed.” Alex’s head fell back as Michael’s mouth moved. But he nodded quickly.

Michael forced himself away from Alex, grabbing his hand and pulling him toward the ladder. He let Alex climb out first, following closely behind. He shut the cover to the bunker with hardly a glance behind him. He flung the trailer door open next and all but shoved Alex inside, though still cautious of his leg.

Not that Alex was any more patient than he was. Alex grabbed him by his shirt, pulling their bodies flush against each other as Michael locked the door with his mind. Michael’s arms wrapped around his waist as their lips came together again. Alex whimpered as his tongue teased his lip. Michael tugged it between his teeth, groaning at the way it made Alex melt against him.

Alex’s hands dragged down his chest to the hem of his shirt again, yanking it up. They only separated for a moment as Michael finished removing the garment. Michael shoved him backwards onto his bed. He smiled down at him and watched hungrily as he rushed to undo the button on his jeans. All of this the same path they had taken three years ago. But it was different now. Neither was going to run away.

Michael crawled onto the bed, settling between Alex’s thighs as he pushed his shirt up and over his head before capturing his mouth again. They sighed against each other’s lips as their skin moved together effortlessly. The cool metal of the dog tags Alex was wearing shocked Michael, but that only made him want to press closer.

Fingers pulled at his hair and then scratched down his back until they reached the top of his jeans. Michael’s mouth fell open in a silent moan as Alex traced the hem around to the belt buckle. He fumbled with the strap for a moment before he yanked it free and immediately popped the button on his jeans.

Michael shifted back to his knees to admire the beautiful man below him. His face was red, lips swollen and wet as he tugged his bottom lip between his teeth. His eyes were half lidded as he ran his fingers over Michael’s abs and tried to pull him back down by the hem of his jeans. As much as he wanted to go with whatever Alex wanted, he wanted to take it slow. The temptation to just throw all their clothing off and get Alex moaning taunted him. But they could do that any time. No. Michael was determined to show him exactly what he thought of him.

He took Alex’s hands in his, threading their fingers together and pressing them down next to his head. Leaning down again, he kissed Alex slowly, only just barely running his tongue over the seem of his lips. A small whine bubbled up from Alex’s throat as his fingers squeezed Michael’s. Michael rubbed his hips against Alex and they both gasped at the friction.

“I need you,” Alex panted out. Michael hushed him gently as he trailed his lips over his jaw to his neck. Alex’s body arched against him as he sucked at his pulse point. Once he was satisfied with the mark, he moved down past his collarbone and hovered over his heart, breathing over the skin before pressing his mouth against him softly.

He slipped his hands out of Alex’s, letting his fingers just ghost over his arms. Michael continued his movement down his body, leaving small, wet kisses in his wake. His hands followed the same path through the hair on his chest as his mouth worked over his stomach to the trail of hair leading down from his belly button.

“I can never come up with the words to tell you how perfect you are,” Michael breathed against his skin. He pressed his forehead against the bottom of Alex’s ribs as he dragged his fingers down to the hem of his jeans. He felt Alex’s hands run through his hair, scratching and tugging. Michael slipped his fingers into the waistband and began pulling the fabric down.

“Michael, wait,” Alex said. He froze and looked up at him, waiting for further instructions. “Let me take off the prosthesis first.” He pushed himself up to his elbows before Michael stopped him.

“If you’ll let me, I can take it off for you.” Alex’s shoulders sagged as a small smile found it’s way to his face. He nodded slowly and took Michael’s hand, pulling it to his mouth to press a couple chaste kisses to his fingers.

Michael slipped to his knees on the floor. He rolled Alex’s pant leg up, exposing the metal and plastic. He worked quickly with Alex watching him, undoing straps and tugging gently. He set the leg to the side carefully, leaning it against the wall.

He looked back up at Alex and hoped that he didn’t blush from the soft look he was getting from him. He rolled the sock off his stump and set it to the side with the prosthesis. He watched Alex through his eye lashes as he pressed kisses to his knee.

Alex gasped softly and pushed himself up completely so he was sitting on the edge of the bed. He took Michael’s face in his hands tenderly, brushing his thumbs over his cheekbones. Michael ran his hands up his legs to his waist and over his stomach. His fingers brushed against the metal of the dog tags when he got to his chest.

He dragged one hand back down to Alex’s hip. The other he let catch on the metal chain. He met Alex’s gaze as their heavy breathing mingled between them. Then Michael tugged on the chain, firmly pulling Alex down toward him.

He pushed himself up at the same time, mouths coming together with a chorus of moans and gasps. Their tongues tasted each other as Michael pushed himself up and Alex back on the bed. Alex’s hands were tangled in his hair, pulling him as close as their bodies would allow.

Michael braced himself with one hand while the other ran down Alex’s body to the waist of his pants again. He grabbed and tugged both the jeans and underwear over his hips. Alex, lifted himself so he could bring them down to his thighs.

He pulled away from Alex to finish removing his clothes, tossing them somewhere to the side. Michael licked his lips as he took in every beautiful inch of him. The firm muscles barely hidden beneath the soft skin. He touched his thighs, the hair tickling his hands. He moved slowly up his thighs and to his hips where his hardness rested between his legs.

Michael avoided touching his cock, instead focusing on massaging everything else around it. He dug his fingers into the soft spot on his hips. Alex rolled toward his touch, sighing blissfully. And he couldn’t help himself, leaning down to press featherlight kisses to the v just below his abs. Alex made a small whimpering sound as he pulled at his own hair.

“So amazing…” Michael mumbled as he continued his line of kisses up over his abs. “Beautiful and strong…” Alex gasped out his name when his hands scratched up his sides and to his arms to hold them above his head. “You were made for me, Alex. I was made to touch you, to kiss you, to live for you, to love you.”

Michael kissed his way back up to his chest, inhaling his scent and hoping that it would be left on his own skin for days. He pressed his tongue over Alex’s nipple briefly before kissing across his chest to the other one. Alex arched his back, pressing his member against Michael’s abs and rubbing. He chuckled.

“Touching you was always the most rewarding part,” he said sweetly before running the tip of his tongue up over his chest and neck and back to his lips. He left only a few centimeters between them as he spoke, “You’re so responsive. I can’t help but want to take you apart.”

“Kiss me, Michael. Now,” Alex ordered. Michael would never deny him anything. Not unless that was the plan. It was about both of them this time. He could play with him in the future. Michael slid his mouth over Alex’s, not being able to stop the smile.

They had a future. And this was only the first of all the ways he would be allowed to love him.

Michael released Alex’s arms and ran his fingers back down his torso to his hips. He pressed the length of his body against him. Alex wrapped his arms around his neck, licking into his mouth and nipping at his lip. Michael moaned softly and rocked his hips against him.

He released Alex to push his own pants and underwear to his knees before kicking them off. He let most of his weight collapse on top of Alex, rolling his hips to rub them against each other. They moaned together as a shudder ran down Michael’s spine.

Alex untangled one of his arms to reach between them. He wrapped his hand around both of them, stroking slowly. Michel groaned into his mouth as his arms started to shake from the effort of holding himself up. He tore himself away from Alex, knowing that if he let this continue, he would finish before even getting inside him. He sat back on his knees, tracing a pattern through the hair on his chest and down to his cock.

He pushed Alex’s hand away from them gently. His panting only increased as Michael took his legs and bent them back slightly. Michael slid down his body so that his mouth hovered over Alex’s now twitching member. Every breath that brushed over him made it jump in anticipation.

He felt Alex’s hand in his hair and looked up at him through his eyelashes. His mouth hung open as his eyes begged for any sort of stimulation. A small bead of precum sat at the tip, threatening to roll down the side.

“You’re so perfect,” Michael said just before taking Alex into his mouth for the first time in years. The salty taste of him was better than he remembered as he slipped most of the way down his shaft. Alex jerked and gasped, tugging on his hair to pull him closer. Michael groaned around him, feeling the way Alex’s fingers tightened again.

Michael rubbed the back of his thighs as he bobbed his head up and down, pushing them open so he could have better access. He let his tongue tease around the head as he slipped further with every down stroke.

“Fuck, Michael,” Alex pleaded. He looked up at him to meet his eyes. He felt the shudder run through Alex’s body as he gasped and twisted his other hand into the sheets on the bed. Then Michael sank down again, taking him to the back of his throat and burying his nose in the short hair at the base.

Alex’s hips jerked up and Michael suppressed his gag reflex by gripping his thighs harder. Alex tugged his already swollen bottom lip between his teeth as his eyes fluttered closed and head fell back. Michael wanted to imprint the image of him blissed out into his brain.

He lifted his head until just the tip with in his mouth before sinking back down in one movement. Alex cried out in pleasure as his fingers pulled on Michael’s hair again. He continued the pattern a few more times before pulling off completely. Alex whined in protest. Michael chuckled and smirked up at him. Then he trailed the tip of his tongue down his length and over his balls, sucking one into his mouth briefly before moving to his ass.

Alex’s back arched again as he tried to press closer to Michael’s tongue. He mumbled something incomprehensible when he started teasing his rim. Michael shifted his hands down to his ass, spreading him open.

“Not… enough…” Alex panted out. Michael nipped at the skin of his ass lightly.

“Just be patient, darlin’,” he said sweetly before pressing a kiss to his skin. Then he pressed his tongue flat against his hole while his thumb pushed just past the rim. Alex’s hips rocked more as small moans slipped from his lips.

Michael worked his thumb in slowly, letting the tip of his tongue slip in alongside it. He pressed against Alex’s walls, urging him open. Alex groaned from above him and grabbed handfuls of his hair, yanking him back up his body to crush their mouths together. Michael didn’t exactly fight hard against it.

He kept his fingers at his hole, slipping his middle finger in and out of him teasingly. Alex bit at his lips and shoved his tongue into his mouth. It stole Michael’s breath away, feeling the desperation he poured into the kiss. He only hoped Alex could feel the same from him. He didn’t get the chance to reciprocate for long because Alex pulled away, instead pressing their foreheads together.

“Tell me you have lube,” he said, voice shaking and breathy.

“Of course.” Michael reached out with his mind to the lowest drawer under the sink. He floated the bottle toward them and dropped it on the bed. “You saying you didn’t like my attentions?” he teased with a smile.

“I liked it too much,” Alex said, brushing their lips together and rocking his hips against Michael’s fingers. “I need to feel you inside me again. To be as close to you as possible. To lose track of where I end and you begin.”

He couldn’t stop the smile that broke out on his face. Michael would do anything for Alex. Bend to his every whim and request.

So he removed his finger from Alex’s hole and instead wrapped his arm around his waist and the other around his back. He pulled him up so he was sitting on his thighs as Michael kneeled on the bed. Alex wrapped his arms around his shoulders, holding him close.

Michael kissed him again, soft and slow. He gripped Alex’s skin, digging his fingers into the muscle. Alex sighed and held him tighter in return. When he was sure he was balanced on his thighs, he reached for the bottle and flicked the cap open. Realizing he was going to need to hands, he pulled his lips away from Alex. There was a small noise of protest that Michael silenced with a quick peck.

“Hold on to me,” he breathed over his lips.

“I wouldn’t dream of letting go.”

He released Alex slowly as their lips slipped over each other again. Michael squeezed a small amount of lube on his fingers. He rubbed it around for a moment before finding Alex’s entrance again. Alex gasped as his fingers prodded the opening.

There was little resistance to the first finger from Michael’s earlier attention. The lube made the second finger slip in just as easily. Alex sighed his name as his hips started rocking slowly. The friction against Michael’s own cock was wholly welcome, making him moan.

Michael twisted and pressed his fingers inside him, looking for the sweet spot he knew would earn him more noises. Alex’s mouth fell open when he finally found it and he could only grin as he swallowed the moan that tumbled from his lips. He massaged his prostate. A few soft strokes followed by a firm press.

Alex’s cock twitched and throbbed against his with every movement. As much as Michael wanted to continue like this until Alex made a mess of them both, he didn’t want to wait anymore. He pulled his fingers out slowly, giving one more teasing press to the spot.

Michael grabbed the lube bottle again, pouring more onto his fingers. He snapped the lid closed and tossed it to the side, hardly registering the sound of it falling to the floor. He carefully shifted Alex back so he could cover his cock in the lube.

Once fully coated, he pulled back to rest his forehead against Alex’s. They both panted as they met each other’s eyes. Michael wrapped an arm around his waist.

“You want this?” he asked a final time. Alex just beamed at him before pulling him back in for a searing kiss.

“Yes. I need you, Michael.”

Michael could only groan in response, claiming his lips again. He lowered Alex back to the bed and he almost immediately wrapped his legs around his waist. With his free hand, Michael guided his cock to Alex’s hole. He pressed himself against the rim, slowly rolling his hips until the tip entered him.

Michael saw stars behind his eyes as he tried to keep his movements slow. The temptation to bury himself in the warmth of Alex was overwhelming. Their moans overlapped as he pushed farther in. He nearly fell forward, needing to brace himself using the arm that had been hold Alex.

“I love you, Michael,” Alex suddenly rushed out. Michael’s eyes opened to meet Alex’s. He had the most beautiful smile he had ever seen on his face. His eyes were half lidded but still completely focused on Michael. “I love you,” he repeated.

His heart soared higher than ever. He never thought he would know this kind of joy. But the man wrapped in his arms was offering it so openly and completely. No extra conditions. Just all the love he could possibly give.

A tear spilled down Michael’s face as he pushed himself completely into Alex. Their mouths fell open and Alex refused to look away from him. He pulled out slightly and pushed in again, this time hearing the moans fall from his own lips.

“God, Alex…” he sighed, letting his head fall to his shoulder as he continued the steady thrusting of his hips.

Michael pressed his lips to his shoulder before sucking on the spot, massaging a mark into his skin. Alex moaned softly as his hips came up to meet Michael’s next thrust. He scratched his nails up and down Michael’s back, distracting him from his rhythm. His hips jerked forward roughly once, making them both gasp at the feeling.

He picked up his rhythm again, moving faster, starting to chase the high that comes with orgasm. Alex clenched around him, moving his own hips in time with Michael. He stopped holding back his moans, instead letting them vibrate over Alex’s skin.

He could feel Alex’s heartbeat from where their chests were pressed together. It pounded just as hard as his own. Possibly threatening to burst from how full of love it was. Alex’s moans were music to his ears. Small plea’s begging for more finally registered in his brain. And he would never deny Alex.

“I’m so close, Michael,” he whined next to his ear. Michael was on the edge too. So he pulled his head from Alex’s shoulder and kissed him again as he sped up his hips again, trying to match the racing of his heartbeat.

He had lost track of his body. He could only feel Alex wrapped around him, fitting perfectly against his skin. Michael ground his hips against Alex’s ass, breaking his even pattern in an effort to feel more of him.

After that he didn’t know what came over him. His hand was pressing to Alex’s chest as his hips only got rougher and more erratic. He could feel the heat rippling out from his hand. Alex cried out and arched against him, one of his own hands moving to cover Michael’s.

“Alex, Alex, Alex,” he panted out.

“Michael!” He felt the spasm of his body against his own, then the warmth of the liquid running between them.

His own orgasm rushed up to him, no time to even consider pulling out. Not that he even wanted to. His hips thrust forward roughly, burying him inside of Alex as his cock emptied. A long moan accompanied each of his last thrusts until he was shaking from the overstimulation.

Michael collapsed against Alex, laying his head against his chest. Alex’s free hand pet his hair gently as their breathing started to even out. Michael dozed and Alex’s occasional snores let him know he wasn’t the only one. It couldn’t have been that long because the mess between them hadn’t dried.

He pulled his eyes open to see his hand placed firmly over Alex’s heart and his hand still covering Michael’s. He lifted his hand slowly and the bright pink, iridescent handprint seemed to ripple with Alex’s breathing.

“You could have warned me how intense it would be,” Alex said quietly, a light and content tone to his voice. Michael pushed himself up slightly to see his face. The sweet smile that always made his heart flutter was back and internally he sighed in relief.

“Had I known it was going to be I would have,” he said, lifting a finger brush over his cheek. “I’m sorry for the handprint. I didn’t—” Alex pulled him in and kissed him, stopping his apology.

“I’m so happy, Michael. About everything. I love you so much,” he said when he pulled away. Michael smiled at him and pressed another kiss to his lips, lingering just slightly when he pulled away.

“I love you, Alex.” Alex held his face gently with a fondness glittering in his eyes.

“I told you to wait until the serum had worn off,” he joked. The fog in his mind had completely vanished though he couldn’t quite remember when. He was still pouring his heart out to Alex but it was because he wanted to. He never wanted to hide anything from him. He never wanted to lie to him.

“It wore off already. I don’t feel the need to say everything I’m thinking,” he said, inching closer to Alex’s lips again. “But I still want to tell you everything. Because right now, all I can think about is you.”

[holylulusworld]

The taming of the shrew (8)

Summary: The babies are on their way. Will Dean survive seeing you give birth? Will the babies are cute and even more important – will your alphas breeding kink awake? 

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader

Characters: Mary Winchester, John Winchester, Sam Winchester, Alex Jones; John Y/F/N Dean Winchester (baby boy), Y/M/N Mary Y/N Winchester (baby girl)

Warnings: pregnant reader, nesting, scenting, cuddling & snuggling, overprotective Dean, general cuteness, giving birth (nothing graphic), nervous Dean (let’s be honest, he’s a wreck), daddy Dean

A/N: Y/F/N = Your father’s name; Y/M/N = Your mother’s name

Divider by @firefly-graphics​

The taming of the shrew masterlist

“Breathe in and out, Y/N,” Alex instructs, looking at you while she moves one hand to your mound. “I will check how far you are, okay. You are safe, your babies are alright. My husband is just down the street and waits for my call if we need more help.”

“O-okay,” you pant, looking at Dean who, as expected, paces around the room. He’s a wreck for half an hour. “Dean, I need you alpha.”

“I’m here,” stumbling toward the bed, reaching out for you Dean tries to find a way to take the pain away. “What can I do, omega? How can I help you?”

“You could sit behind Y/N and let her rest her back against your chest. Put your hands on her belly, rub it gently and breathe with her,” holding back a smirk Alex watches your alpha clumsily move behind you to replace the pillows he stuffed behind your back.

“Okay, hands on your belly,” Dean pants heavily but he follows Alex’s instructions. “Slow and gentle. Now breathe with me, sweetheart. Like we trained with Alex.”

“I-I’m trying, but-“ you cry out, scream in pain when another contraction ripples through your body. “I want my mommy,” you whine, watching your mother usher inside your room. “Please.”

“I’m here, Y/N,” your mother stands next to the bed to hold your hand. “Just breathe with your alpha, he’ll guide you through birth. I know you can do it. Your bond will help you ease the pain, okay. Soon you will see your babies and all the pain is forgotten.”

“Omega,” Dean purrs against you, lets the vibrations run through his chest to make you feel safe. “I know you can do this. We are all here. I can already see our babies in your arms.” you fist the sheets underneath you, snarl in all directions before you finally concentrate on Dean’s words.

“Babies,” you sniffle, looking down your body. “I can’t let them out already, can I? I need to protect my pups. What happens if anyone wants to hurt them?” panicked you look at Alex when she tells you to push again.

“Push, Y/N. I can already see the head,” whining you squeeze your mother’s hand. “One more time, sweetie. You can do it. The first baby is almost there…”

“Aw, look at his tiny hands,” you coo, looking at your baby boy in your arms. Your little bundle of joy sleeps peacefully, doesn’t even flinch when you gently nuzzle him. “I will never not hold him.”

“If he grows like Sammy and me, you’ll not be able to lift him,” Dean gently rocks your baby girl, looking at her with big wet eyes. “She’s so pretty. Look at her tiny nose. I bet she will scrunch it up as you do anytime you don’t like my food.”

“I love your food, just not the burger monstrosity you bought,” pecking your son’s head you sigh deeply. He feels so small and vulnerable in your arms and you hope Dean and you can protect him from any harm. “They are perfect, and we made them, Dean.”

“And it was fun making them,” purring low in his throat Dean looks at you on the bed he built. I can fill you again soon. I want a house filled with kids one day.” proudly puffing his chest your alpha looks at you, a smirk on his lips.

“Dean,” you would like to protest by all you get out is a soft purr. You never expected to fall in love with your babies the moment you lay eyes on them but now, you are addicted. “Not now. We got our hands full of our pups.”

“She smells so good,” sniffing at your daughter’s head Dean smiles. “Like a mixture of you and me and cuteness. Aw, she just cooed.”

“Dean, stop making me cry,” sniffling you watch your alpha sit on the bed to show you your baby girl in his arms. “I can’t cry or they will wake up. Let them sleep a bit longer.”

“I can’t wait to hear them call me daddy,” nuzzling your daughter Dean purrs, wanting his children to get used to his voice. “Could eat her alive. Just look at my cute baby girl.”

“Is said – don’t make me cry,” you whimper, hating you are an emotional wreck at the moment. “I need to hold back to not cuddle our baby boy too much. He’s just too cute.”

“He’s mine, how could he not be cute?” Dean grins, giving you a wink. “Every pup I’ll put in your belly will be cute and handsome.” cockily looking at you Dean waits for your confirmation. “Right?”

“Handsome?” humming you look at Dean, knowing he wants you to compliment him. “I don’t know, Winchester. Maybe you are cute but handsome-“ you shrug, laughing as Dean grumbles under his breath.

“Don’t make me cuddle you, omega. I will put our baby girl in her cradle and cuddle you like never before,” giggling you look at Dean, give him your brightest smile as he tries to give you a stern look. 

“I want to see my grandchildren,” Mary paces outside your house. “Did they let you have a look?” shaking her head your mother places one hand onto Mary’s shoulder.

“I was there when Y/N gave birth but had to leave the moment the first pup arrived. Dean was too dangerous. If I stayed inside the bedroom, he could’ve attacked and killed me.”

“Newborn pups and his vulnerable omega around turn every alpha into an overprotective beast. You should know that Mary. Do you remember the day Dean was born?” furrowing his brows John tries to not smirk. “I almost killed your father.”

“You bite him, John,” sighing deeply Mary looks at the house again. “Are they okay? What if anything happened? God, what if they need our help?”

“The babies are healthy and safe,” Sam grins, showing his father the pictures Dean took of you and his pups. “Aw, he took a selfie with his baby girl.”

“Names, seize, weight,” Mary pants, snatching the phone out of Sam’s hands. “They are perfect. Oh, god my Dean is a father,” feeling her legs give in Mary grasps for John’s hand. “Did I tell him everything about parenting? What if I forgot something?”

“Mary,” John laughs. “Calm down. Dean is an adult, a man, and an alpha. He knows how to take care of his omega, apparently.” Now the elder alpha grins, looking at the phone. “Or Y/N wouldn’t have his kids.”

“JOHN!” scolding her husband for his indecency Mary sighs deeply. “Do you think they’ll show the pups to us today? Maybe if we ask nicely?”

“Ask or demand?” John snickers, nodding at your father. “I mean, Y/N lied about her parents, told Dean they are dead as she didn’t want anyone to know about her family. She even hid things from her alpha. Do you think she will show you the kids right after she gave birth?”

“I-I hope so,” nibbling at her lower lip Mary looks at the phone again. “He’s a good father, a good alpha. Dean will be so-“ starting to cry Mary hides her face in her husband’s chest. “My son is an adult now, John. He’s not my little Dean anymore.”

“Mom, I hate to say it, but Dean ain’t a kid for the longest time,” smirking Sam watches his father roll his eyes.

“Can you just not, Sammy? I can barely tame your mother. She wants to tear down the door to get to her son. Jesus, you need to learn a thing or two about omegas before you have pups.”

“LOOK!” your father says, pointing toward the door when you and Dean slowly step outside. “Y/N, sweetie!”

“Five minutes,” Dean growls, stepping in front of you. “You all got five minutes to look at the babies and then you’ll leave us alone.”

“Five minutes?” Mary almost trips over her feet when she rushes toward Dean to look at the little boy in his arms. “He’s so pretty, Dean.”

“John Y/F/N Dean Winchester is his father’s son. Of course, he’s handsome as hell,” Dean exclaims, nodding at his father.

“Aw, the little girl, look Y/M/N!” Mary sniffs, looking at the little girl in your arms, but she dares not to touch her. “What’s her name?”

“Y/M/N Mary Y/N Winchester,” you laugh when Mary starts to cry. “Dean insisted she needs my name too so, she has three names now, just like her brother.”

“Well done, Dean,” Sam purrs, looking at your babies. “Luckily, both look like your mate.” he grins but his heart swells watching his brother hold his baby boy in his arms. “He’s cute, I give him that.”

“Son, good job,” John smirks, watching your father silently cry. “You made everyone cry. I am proud of you and your mate. Never thought you can make such cute babies. On the other hand, Winchester men are attractive as hell.”

“Cockiness runs in the family, I see,” giggling you lean your head against Dean’s shoulder. “If you all excuse us now, we are tired and the babies need sleep. We booked a room for all of you at the lodge nearby. If you behave like good grandparents, you can see the pups tomorrow morning after we fed them.”

“Tomorrow,” nodding eagerly Mary bits her goodbye is the first one to step aside. “I’m glad everything worked out. You are so-“ she sniffs. 

“We see us tomorrow,” John leads his wife toward his car, wiping a single tear off his cheek before anyone can see he shed a tear too. 

“I hope you know that we are sorry, Mary and me. I’m proud of you and Dean, Y/N,” your mother pecks your cheek. 

“What your mother said,” your father whispers, kissing your hair. “You’re going to be a great mom.”

“Don’t kill the babies,” Sam laughs before he runs after his parents. “And don’t make more overnight. I don’t think our parents will survive more cuteness, Dean…”

“Finally, alone,” snuggling closer to his pups Dean looks them all over. You placed the babies between you and your mate to keep an eye on them on their first night in this world. “Look, they are already asleep. Little angels.”

“Little angels,” swooning you watch your alpha peck the babies’ heads, purring for them to assure safety and warmth. “And a devil.”

“I’m no devil,” he grins, giving you a dirty look. “Maybe when you feel better and recovered I’ll give you a hell of a ride, omega…”

“Fed, clean and cute,” Dean hums, watching you rock both babies in your arms. “See, we didn’t kill them. Now calm down and watch your grandchildren.” laughing at Dean’s words you look around the living room. 

Everyone gathered in the room this morning to check on their newest family members. Now they watch you with the babies in your arms, sighing and purring now and then.

“Dean changed his first diaper this morning and succeed,” they don’t have to know your baby boy peed onto his father’s shirt before he could stop him. “He wants to learn how to breastfeed too.” You blur out to break the tension.

Sam is the first one to laugh at your bad joke, followed by your father and John.

“I would,” grumbling Dean sits next to you to runs his hand over your baby boy’s head. “Just don’t have enough milk.”

“But he’s warm and the babies like to sleep on his naked chest,” you say, grinning as Dean nods eagerly. “Especially our baby girl prefers to sleep on her daddy. She cries anytime I tried to put her in her cradle.”

“In conclusion, we are doing fine. Now we have something to announce,” Dean gets up, clears his throat before he looks at you and his babies again. “Y/N and I are going to marry-“ he raises his hand, stops his mother before she can freak out. “Not a word, mom. Yes, you can help us but no, you’ll not decide anything.”

“We want to wait till spring,” you jump in, nodding at Dean. “There is enough time to plan things and to make sure we will get the wedding we want.”

“Last but not least, Sammy, you will be my best man,” hiding the choked-out sob poorly Sam nods, giving his brother a soft smile. “Good, now let’s eat cause I’m hungry as hell. I prepared breakfast.”

>> Epilogue

More tags in reblog.

The taming of the shrew tags

@niiight-dreamerr​​

[lovecolibri]

Be Here To Love Me

I did a thing

“Hmmm….” Kyle is frowning over a medical chart and Michael is about to snap. Alex could have died and both he and Kyle are acting like it’s just another Thursday afternoon. Michael is standing in slippers and those two have been bantering. It’s infuriating.

“What’s that chart written in, Valenti, hieroglyphics? Spit it out!” 

Kyle, true to form, doesn’t look up from where he is flipping between pages and alternately staring at the scan displayed on the wall. Alex reaches out a hand to catch Michael’s wrist as he stomps past, halting his pacing. At the feeling of Alex’s skin on his, Michael freezes with a sharp intake of breath and Alex snatches his hand back like it’s been burned. If Kyle notices he doesn’t let on, brows pulled tight in concentration and Alex takes the opportunity to murmur a quick “I’m fine, Michael. It’s fine.”

It was so stupid. They have spent the past several weeks dealing with increasingly dangerous alien bullshit! Alex did three tours overseas and survived the nightmare that was his dad. Michael’s quick reflexes and brilliant mind made sure he managed to survive every shitty foster home, bar brawl, and government conspiracy that tried to take him down. It should have taken more than loose gravel and Michael’s inattention to land Alex in the hospital with possible broken ribs, a twisted leg, and various other scrapes and bruises. And he’d only made it worse, apologizing, stumbling over the repeated words the whole time he was trying to help Alex up until Alex had finally snapped “Later, Guerin!” at him. The first half of the drive to the hospital had been made in stony silence with Alex trying to breathe through the pain, hissing at the jostling gait of the old Chevy. Once they hit the paved roads of town and he’d caught his breath he’d apologized for snapping, hell, he’s looking apologetically at Michael right now, but it still feels like they are walking on eggshells.

Kyle shuts the file with a snap startling them out of their staring match and looks between them before settling on Alex. 

“I have a couple of questions, but overall, everything looks as okay as can be expected.”

Alex gives him an “I told you so” look, and Michael breaths easy for what feels like the first time since he watched Alex fall, unable to remove his watch with the pollen-filled backing (a Mr. Jones deterrent the alien trio had taken to wearing) in time to use his powers. Maybe, if he had been more focused on making sure Alex made it into the cave with the pods safely instead of how smooth and delicious the skin of his neck looked in the bluish light, he could have prevented this. He wasn’t supposed to be looking at Alex like that anyway. Despite both currently being single, he and Alex are just friends and even that seems strained. Michael, as always, struggling to find his footing, has mirrored Alex’s behavior (distant, at best) to make sure he doesn’t overstep. But that has only seemed to push Alex away more. And now…now his inability to look at Alex like the work colleagues Alex clearly just wants to be made him miss that crucial moment when the gravel of the pathway gave out and he still might have had time to get the watch off and at least cushion the fall.

“The main worry was your ribs,” He hears Kyle say, and he blinks quickly trying to focus back on the conversation at hand and not his self-recrimination. “But, while the bruising is pretty bad and you need to rest, I mean it Alex, rest, they aren’t fractured. Your leg should also be okay, but that’s the tricky bit. You need to keep the prosthetic off until the swelling goes down and you can move without pain, but with your ribs being bruised, I wouldn’t recommend using your crutches any more than strictly necessary, and really, if you have a wheelchair, you should use that instead.”

Alex’s face had looked stormy earlier when they arrived but he looks more calculating now, which has Michael worried. That look never bodes well, usually for Alex. Alex calls it his “planning face” while Michael prefers to call it his “self-sacrificing face” because he’s usually coming up with a plan that inevitably puts him in harm’s way. Kyle must notice the look too because he narrows his eyes at Alex.

“You do understand what exactly I mean by “rest”, don’t you? No work, no play, no strenuous sexual activi-“

“YES, Kyle, I understand!” Alex says loudly, talking over Kyle, and though his back is still ramrod straight, his cheeks flush slightly and he’s very carefully not looking at Michael.

“Good. I’ll have a doctor’s note waiting for you at check-out to send to the base if needed, along with your prescriptions and the info for your follow up appointment which you will attend or I swear I’ll send one of the ambulance crews to do a welfare check, understood?”

Alex ducks his head slightly, but Michael knows him well enough to know he is, while understandably frustrated about the situation, ultimately pleased at the evidence that Kyle cares so much.

“Yeah, yeah, I got it. Anything else?”

“Well, the pain meds seem to be working and no new symptoms have cropped up, so you should be good to go. I just want to clarify a few things about these imaging results first.” 

Alex nods along but when Kyle doesn’t say anything more, he cocks his head to the side, waiting. Kyle keeps staring at him before his eyes finally, reluctantly, flicker to Michael and back. 

“I’d prefer to do this in private, it’s some confidential questions regarding past injur-”

“Oh like hell I’m leaving” Michael snaps, cutting Kyle off mid-sentence.

(Read the rest on A03)