#every night before i go to bed i kept telling to myself that i need to work on this post

[crowsofdarkness]

After weeks of arguing, you thought your relationship with Bucky was near the end. That was until you held something positive in your hand.

18+ CW's below the cut(angst, language, unprotected pinv in Bucky's computer chair, Bucky having a sudden breeding kink)

The door slamming in the small confines of my apartment echoed causing me to jump, doing whatever I could to keep the tears at bay. I wouldn't cry, not for him. Not for Bucky.  Even though the moment he walked in the door, all I wanted to do was cry not only because of the constant arguing but because I missed him terribly. He was here physically but emotionally, Bucky was checked out. 

"Asshole," I grumbled under my breath, eyes boring daggers into the closed door of his office/studio. 

It had been weeks of non stop fighting yet barely speaking to each other. He’d been gone on missions constantly so he could avoid being home. When I needed him the most, he was gone. 

Ignoring the thoughts plaguing my existence lately, I blew out a shaky breath and forced myself to turn back towards the kitchen counter.  The exhaustion had been buried deep in my bones for the last couple of weeks and I didn’t think it had anything to do with working almost every day. All I wanted to do was curl in bed to sleep the rest of the evening away. Even though Bucky's words from our fight this morning before I left for work kept pestering me. 

"I haven't thought much about the future. I'm trying to focus on getting myself better, mentally, before having kids." 

I asked him in the middle of yet another argument where he thought this relationship was going because I made the mistake of mentioning how I felt like things were stale between us. Bucky didn't think of the future. Of our future. He only thought of the now. 

It had been weeks of arguing. Weeks of walking on eggshells around each other. Weeks of not having sex. And weeks of keeping a secret to myself. Now that I knew how Bucky felt, I couldn't decide on if I should continue to keep it to myself or tell him which could potentially ruin everything. 

The urge to cry burned in my throat as I snatched the bag off of the kitchen counter and locked myself in the bathroom. I stared at my reflection in the mirror for a long moment, noting the dark circles under my eyes. 

Averting my gaze away from the mirror, I dug out the box from the bag and nearly choked on a breath when I read over the letters once more. I nearly dropped it in the pharmacy when the realization began to sink in. 

Pregnancy Test. 

I had missed my period last month and it was coming up on when I was supposed to get it this month but with how I’d been feeling, I knew I wouldn’t be getting my period this month either. 

That night was a night where we had a huge blowout argument, both of us questioning if we loved another. Deep down we knew we still loved each other and it was wrong for us to question it. But both of us were stubborn so instead of admitting our love, we decided to fuck out our frustrations; Bucky dragging me to the shower with him as I wrapped my legs around his midsection, marking his neck as mine while his cock slammed into me. Afterwards, Bucky helped me to our bed and apologized for the fight as he held me against his chest. I took the morning after pill later that afternoon once we realized we weren’t safe which is why I was hoping the test would be negative. Maybe the reason why I missed my period was because of all the stress I’d been under. 

“Might as well get this over with,” I grumbled under my breath while ripping open the box. 

It came with two tests and I figured it would be better if I used both so after peeing on both sticks, I set them on the counter and washed my hands. These next five minutes were going to be incredibly slow so after I changed into one of Bucky’s shirts and opted out of wearing pants, I paced the bathroom.

“Shit,” I clutched my chest when the timer on my phone went off. 

As I reached for the tests which were overturned, I paused for a moment wondering if maybe I should have been doing this with Bucky. 

“If he wasn’t such an asshole,” I muttered to the thought in my head and turned over the two tests. 

My heart was in my ears, in my throat, and in the depths of my stomach when I saw the one word that sealed our fate. 

Positive. 

Both tests were positive. 

“Fuck me,” I breathed while resting a hand on my stomach, the tears finally falling. 

There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that even though we were fighting, Bucky would be fine with whatever I decided to do. It was my choice. But would he stay with me? The Avengers seemed to be all over the world, helping people who needed it, hence why Bucky had been in a mood lately. I knew his anger wasn't directly related to me but because he’d been overworked. I also knew that didn’t give him the right to take it out on me. 

Pulling up Bucky’s text thread on my phone, shaking fingers worked out a text even though he was still in the next room. 

Me: I need to talk to you. It’s important. Can you meet me in the living room please? 

Bucky 🩶: Not right now. 

With a snarl, I snatched the tests off the bathroom counter and stormed out into his office, letting the door smack against the wall. Bucky didn’t bother to look away from the book on his lap as he sat on his computer chair. 

“Congratulations. You’re going to be a father,” I snapped before turning to walk away. 

The chair creaked as Bucky leaned forward to gaze down at his desk, a soft breath catching in his throat. 

“Doll,” his vibranium fingers grazed my wrist, halting me. “Wait.” 

“What? Are you going to claim I’m faking this?” I snapped, slicing him with my gaze. 

“I-,” Bucky’s face softened as he looked back at the pregnancy tests. “You’re pregnant?” 

I let the anger fade momentarily when I heard the sincerity in his voice; the slight excitement. 

“Yeah, I guess so. I missed my period last month and I’ve been so exhausted lately. Not to mention my boobs have been really sore,” I cringed while running a hand over my chest. 

Bucky glanced up at my breasts with a small smirk but then he let his gaze lower on my stomach where it rested for a long few beats of silence. Fear of what he would do or say weighed heavy on my shoulders causing me to remain frozen in front of him. The air in the room was thick with an unreadable tension and the ringing in my ears was deafening. I couldn’t even hear our shared breathing as Bucky continued to stare at my stomach before his large hands rested there.

“Hi,” he breathed. “I’m your dad.”

I dragged a finger over his cheek, those ocean eyes I adored so much gazed up at me. “I’m sorry.” 

“For what, doll?” Bucky asked with furrowed brows. 

“For everything. For avoiding fixing things between us by working non stop.”

I rattled off which made him link fingers with me and brought me down onto his lap, both of us now sitting in his computer chair. He rested his hands over my hip, slowly raising up the hem of my shirt so he could drag calloused fingers over my skin. It was the most contact we’ve had in a week and I leaned farther into him. His nose dragged over my jaw, breathing me in. 

“I’m sorry for all of the hurtful things I’ve said. I’m sorry for ignoring your feelings when I should have asked you up front what was wrong. I’m sorry for locking myself away with work instead of fixing things between us,” Bucky apologized. 

I looked deeper into his eyes, taking in the slight freckles on his face. “Can I be honest?” 

When Bucky nodded, I continued. “You freaked me out when you said you never thought of our future and now that I’m pregnant, I’m worried you’re going to leave.” 

“Absolutely not,” he cupped my cheek, dragging his thumb just underneath my eye to wipe away the stray tears. “I’ve never thought about the future until you came into my life, doll. I might not express it enough, which is my fault but please know you’re in my future. Especially now.” 

His free hand grazed over my stomach and I nodded into the grasp on my cheek, leaving a kiss on the inside of his palm. 

“Can you promise me one thing?” I asked. 

“Anything.” 

Biting my lip, I spoke. “Can you promise not to propose to me just because I’m pregnant? I want you to propose because you want to, not because you feel like you have too.”

Something flashed in his eyes but Bucky eventually nodded. “Of course.”

While sitting on his lap, the chair continued to creak underneath our shared weight and I sighed, ready to get off which caused him to tighten his grip on me. 

“Stay,” he breathed in the crook of my neck. “I need to show you how sorry I am.” 

Quickly, Bucky’s lips were on mine in a leisurely kiss. It started off like how our first kiss did, like he was testing the waters again. I nearly sobbed into the kiss when I felt the love pour out of him. I’d been desperate to feel this way again. With his hands on my hips, he began moving me up and down his lap, the hardness of his cock pressing against the thin material of my panties. His name fell from my lips, almost immediately swallowed by his tongue as it explored my mouth; tasting me. 

Vibranium fingers slinked up my shirt to graze over my back before Bucky tossed it over my head and down to the floor, breaking our kiss. Lust bleed in his already dark eyes as he looked at my stomach, his cock straining in his jeans. 

“Shit,” he groaned while pressing kisses along my chest. “I can’t wait to see you round with my baby.” 

A moan fell from my lips as I exposed more of myself to Bucky, his teeth now grazing over my nipples. Along with my sore breasts, my nipples were extra sensitive. 

“Bucky,” I pulled on his shirt. 

He immediately understood and helped me work it off. Immediately my nails raked along his chest as my lips met his again in a fiery kiss, this one more intense than the last. With a gentle tap to my ass, I raised my hips slightly so Bucky could drag down my panties with a bit of maneuvering. However with his jeans, it would have taken way more manuerving on his part to slide them off completely. 

“We should move to the bed,” I suggested, breathless. 

Bucky shook his head, keeping his lips on the current mark he was working on my neck. “Absolutely not. I want you to sit on my cock while I sit on the chair.” 

Feeling feisty, I pulled away from him slightly to gaze down at him. “Really? This has nothing to do with Steve making it slip the other day how he and his girlfriend did something eerily similar to this.” 

He rolled his eyes with a groan. “Please don’t bring up Steve having sex right now.” 

When he motioned towards his unzipped jeans, I let out a soft giggle and then reached my hand in his briefs to grab his cock, already so warm and hard. 

“I’ve missed this,” I whispered, gathering his precum to drag it over his head. 

“Doll,” my name came out through gritted teeth as Bucky rested his head on my shoulder. “I need to be inside of you. Please.”

Pulling his cock out from his briefs completely, I dragged it between my folds a few strokes before sinking down on him; both of us letting out a loud groan of pleasure.  It had been so long since we’ve felt this so I knew we wouldn’t last long. 

“Fuck,” Bucky strangled out while wrapping his arms around me to bring me closer. “I can’t wait to watch your belly get round with my baby.”

I mewled in response, mouth busy with leaving dark marks across his neck while one of my hands slipped between our bodies to press circles on my clit, bringing me closer to the edge. 

His cock twitched inside of me, indicating he was close when his hips stilled. “You'd look so beautiful pregnant with my kid. Your belly and tits-oh shit." 

“Don’t stop,” I begged while riding him faster this time, the chair nearly falling over. 

“Doll,” Bucky’s voice was strained so I brushed away the hair from his sweat slicked forehead. “I’m going to fill you up over and over again.” 

I nodded as the coil in my stomach began to ignite in a blaze of ecstasy, my orgasm about to snap. 

“I love you,” I cried out when my body finally snapped, arousal coating Bucky’s cock. 

With one final thrust, he followed me over the edge as he filled me with his cum and breathlessly announced his love for me as well. Falling into him with exhaustion, Bucky lifted me from the chair and carried me through our apartment towards the bathroom. 

“Are you alright?” He questioned while still carrying me. 

I pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m okay.”

Setting me on the closed toilet seat, he turned on the shower and removed his pants while we waited for the steam to bellow around us. 

[nnnneeev]

i saw that you have hcs for solomon on a grocery date? whenever you’re not busy and whenever you want i’d loooove to eat your hcs up:> (as well as any other hcs you may have about solomon because he’s 🔛🔝)

*cracks knuckles* finally i can share them hahahahha

solomon will get excited when you invite him to go to groceries. he loves doing domestic activities with you

treats it like a date. he has already planned on where to go next after your little grocery trip

you grab the items and he pushes the cart for you

often gets distracted by sales

buys things that are off the list

'mc we have to check out the magic items aisle'

the type to impulsively buy something and insists that you'll 'need it in the future'

[thecuriousbeauty]

Arguments and Cuddles-Harry Styles x reader

A/N:- Wanted to write this a few days ago, but I just couldn't get myself to write after all that has happened. Sending lots of hugs to everyone. Hope this acts a distraction to anyone who needs it right now.

Synopsis: Harry doesn't realize that you're sick when he starts an argument and takes care of you after. Some angst and fluff!

Word Count: 2k

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“y/n..” Your tall, lanky boyfriend makes grabby hands at you from the bed, snug and comfortable under the blanket. He didn’t want to fall asleep without you. You felt bad for making him wait, you really did, but you couldn’t go to bed without finishing your assignment. University has been stressing you out these days, what with two projects every week, along with other papers, studying and you even have to start filling out internship forms. 

“Five more minutes, baby, I’m so sorry..”, you turn back from the desk to tell Harry who was pouting at you, hoping to win you over with cuteness, which he already has. 

“It’s okay, love. I don’t mind waiting but it’s you I’m worried about. If you’re not here in my arms sleeping in the next ten minutes, no kisses for you tomorrow.”, he threatens, and smirks when you gasp. “That’s unfair!”

“You better hurry up then.”, Harry says, picking up his phone and settling back with his head on the pillow. It took you exactly seven more minutes to complete the assignment. 

“I’m done! You can’t deny me kisses now.” You keep your laptop away before falling into Harry’s open arms. You sigh as your head hits the soft pillow, and you realize just how exhausted you are when you feel your heavy eyelids. 

“I don’t think I ever can.”, Harry hums, chuckling as you snuggle into his chest like a little kitten seeking comfort. His arms hold you snug to his chest as his face lowers to press soft kisses to your hair and your cheeks. “I missed you.”

You know he didn’t just mean today. It’s been almost two weeks since you’ve been in this hectic schedule and you haven’t been able to see Harry as often. You’re either too tired or have lots of work to do after you get home from uni, so you haven’t been spending much time with your boyfriend. 

You bring a hand up to cup his cheek, your thumb stroking over his soft skin. “I’m sorry, babe. I miss you too. I  just have so much to do and-”, you sigh.

“-Hey, I understand love, know you’re working hard.”, he rubs circles onto your lower back and you almost moan at how good it feels. “I’m just worried about you. You barely sleep, barely eat during the day, step out of the house only to go to uni…”

“I do eat and sleep.”, you tell him, pecking his pink lips. “It’s gonna be hectic only for another week, the projects should be over by then.”

He hummed. “Would you be free tomorrow night? It’s Friday. Mitch and Sarah have been wanting to meet you.”

Mitch and Sarah were two of his best friends, and you’ve wanted to meet them too. Like he said, it was Friday, so you’d have time to catch up on your studies on Saturday and Sunday. Harry was just asking you, but you could see he really wanted you to go. You haven’t had a night out in a while too, so you agree. 

“Okay, I’ll meet them.”

Harry cheers, making you giggle and kiss his cheek. “They’re so excited to meet you! I love you.”

________________________________________________

You weren’t expecting to fall sick when you got up that morning. You did feel a little less energetic, but that was normal by now, so you brushed it off. You attended your classes, and when it was around lunch time, your throat was parched even though you kept sipping on water and your eyes were getting watery. 

You didn’t feel like eating, so you skipped lunch, which led to a headache and you were just feeling horrible when you got back home that day. You were relieved to be back, and you fell into bed immediately, not bothering to change. God, you hated being sick. It makes you so weak and you can’t get anything done. You take a small nap, hoping to wake up feeling better. 

You had kept an alarm to wake up an hour and a half before the time Harry said he would come to pick you up for the night out, but you slept right through it. You didn’t wake up even when Harry stepped into your flat, using your other pair of keys and called out your name. 

He was ten minutes late himself, and he was surprised to see that you weren’t ready yet. 

“y/n?”, he says. “Babe why aren’t you ready, we should be there in twenty minutes!”

You rub your eyes, slowly coming out of sleep. “Oh…shit.”, you remember when you see Harry already standing in front of you. “I s-slept through the alarm.”

“It’s fine, I’ll tell them we’ll be a bit late. You should get ready.”, Harry said, already pulling out his phone. 

You sit up, groaning as your muscles ache. Your head was throbbing, and you felt like your body was on your fire. You knew you wouldn’t make it through the night even if you tried.

“Harry? I think you should go alone, I’ll meet them some other time..”, you say softly. 

Harry bites his lip. “Seriously? You’re telling me now? I asked you last night, y/n!”

“I know I’m sorry, I just-”

“-I try to be understanding but it’s not gonna work if I’m the only one putting in effort, y/n. I didn’t tell you anything, I didn’t complain about you not spending time with me, I just asked if you could go out with me for one night and you can’t.”, Harry scoffs, walking back and forth. 

Your eyes well up with tears from your sickness, and Harry’s words. You get up, even though you felt like you would crumble like a sack of potatoes if you did. 

“Harry, I’m sorry, I don’t-”

“-No. I don’t want to hear it, y/n. I talk to them about you all the time and they were so excited to meet you, you know? Now you want to cancel. I don’t get it, what’s going to happen if you go out for one night?” He stops to look at you.

That’s when your head spins. You feel like the whole world is turning upside down and you reach a hand out to grip something, but you only found air. 

Harry was fuming, but he only then noticed that you weren’t looking too good. Your skin was pale and prickly with sweat, you were unsteady on your feet and your voice was breaking as you whimpered his name for help, “H-Harry.”

“Fuck.”, he cursed, and rushed to you, strong arms holding you before your knees gave out. You grip his sleeve as he makes you sit back down on the bed. “y/n? Baby, are you okay?”

You manage a weak hum in response. Harry’s hand cups your forehead, pressing your head back against his arm. “Jesus, you’re burning up. Why didn’t you tell me you’re sick?”

If you had the energy, you could have punched him. “Y-You didn’t give me the chance.”

“I’m an asshole.”, Harry muttered, green eyes washing over you with worry as he settles you back into bed. 

“You are.”, you agree, shivering as his cold fingers brush against your forehead, stroking back some of your hair. “I really wanted to go out too, you know. I should’ve let you know earlier that I was sick but I thought I could pull through..” You winced, bringing a hand up to your head. You always get bad headaches when you’re sick.

“Shh..did you take any medicine? Should I take you to the doctor?”, Harry asks, pressing a soft kiss to your temple. 

“No..think I’ll be fine, just gonna sleep. You should go.”, you said softly. 

“Leaving you like this alone? No. I’m gonna take care of you. I’ll call Mitch and let him know we can’t make it. We’ll do it some other time.” 

“I really am sorry. I-I was just trying to finish everything during the week so I could spend the weekend with you. Didn’t mean to make you upset, Harry.”, you whisper, and Harry shakes his head, stroking away a small tear that runs down your cheek with your thumb. 

“Don’t apologize, love, you did nothing wrong. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. You’re working hard to get where you want to be, and I’ll always support you. I should’ve realized you’re gonna get yourself sick.” He tsked, taking your hand and kissing your fingertips. “Do you forgive me?”

You smiled and nodded, leaning into his side as he wrapped an arm around you. “My poor baby. Are you sure you’re okay? Not dizzy right?”

“Yeah, I’m not dizzy anymore, think I just got up too fast.”, you mumble into his shoulder.

“I’ll get you some medicine and make you some soup. Then we’ll cuddle in bed for the rest of the night.”, Harry says, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Tomorrow, when you’re feeling a bit better, we’re gonna make a proper schedule together, okay? I can’t have you feeling so stressed out and falling ill again.”

“Okay.”, you smile. Harry got out of bed and tucked the blanket over you. You curled up and closed your eyes. “Come back soon..”

“Promise I will.”

He found you some medicine and made you take it, then brought a cold cloth to your forehead. You flinched at the cold, and he hushed you softly, “Shh, relax sweetheart, we’ve gotta get your temperature down.” He lays the cloth across your forehead. “Feels good, doesn’t it?” 

After the initial cold, it did feel relaxing. You sigh and hum in agreement. You were getting drowsy again. Harry smiles and kisses your nose. “I’ll be back with your soup by the time you take a little nap.”

Harry wakes you up with a bowl of steaming hot soup after some time, and he helps you sit up, placing pillows behind your back. He slides into bed next to you, holding the tray that had the bowl of soup. 

He blows on a spoonful before bringing it to your lips, other hand cupping under your chin to catch any excess that dribbles down. “I tried my best, it’s my mum’s recipe.”, he says, eyes hopeful as you swallow it down.

The hot liquid was soothing for your sore throat, and the flavors were actually very nice. He raises his eyebrows in question. 

“It’s really good, thank you.”, you smile, pinching his cheek gently. A grin takes over his face as he brings up another spoon. “I can eat by myself, you know.”

“I want to feed you.”

Harry feeds you the rest of the soup while he talks to you,  then goes back to the kitchen to clear everything before falling in bed with you. 

“Did you eat?”, you ask, placing your head on his chest and looking up at him. 

“I did, sweet girl. While making your soup.”, he says, pressing a kiss to your hair, his fingers starting to massage your scalp. He chuckles when you let out a soft groan. 

“How’s your head now? Are you feeling a little better?”, he checks, his other hand running up and down your back. 

“Uh huh, think your soup’s got the magic.”, you whisper, eyes already starting to flutter close. Harry laughs, nudging his nose against your cheek. “I put some magic in it, it’s called love.”

“Oh?”

“Mhm, and it’s special, only for you.”, he says, pressing feather soft kisses against the side of your face. “Gonna nurse my girl back to health in no time.”

“I love you.”, you say, your hand tucking under his side as he pulls you closer. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

“No need to thank me, gonna do it for the rest of my life.”, he promises, pressing a kiss to your lips. “I love you so much, y/n.”

You gasped. “What?”, he asks, worrying if you were going to throw up or something.

“You kissed me, idiot! Now you’re gonna get sick too.”

Harry laughs, taking your chin and giving you another kiss, making you slap his chest, playfully. “I’m big and strong, I don’t get sick.”

“Sure. I remember how you were being a big whiny baby last month when you had the flu.”

“Hush.”, he chuckles as you giggle, touching his forehead to yours. “Go to sleep, my giggly girl.”

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Taglist: -@livypops12352568 @harrydeary, @harryswifee, @harrysbxtchh, @gracelovesethan, @kiwitsayedsugar, @angeldavis777,@madstyles3204, @youngpastafanmug, @fruity-harry, @wannaliveinparadise

[azzifuddfanpage]

waves crashing

————

title creds @ldapper

Amazing prompt by 🥖anon here! 6.6k words

tw: smut

themes: dating/ angst/ fluff/ smut

————

Day before graduation

———

p💗: hiiii Azzi 

Az💗: hi baby

P💗: watcha doin? 

        Wishin I was wit u rn fr 

        I know it’s only been a few days but feels like forever 

Az 💗: I know baby I miss u so much too 

          How did we ever do long distance??

P💗: I’m never letting u go home by urself again 

Az💗: I know P I’m sorry 😞 

          I’ll see u Tom for graduation tho! 

P💗: ayyyy and then cruise

        Can’t wait to have my girl alone ifykwim 

Az💗: fuck I was gonna tell you something but I forgot now cuz miss u so bad istg im already wet

P💗: not surprised 🤷‍♀️ 

        (I need you so bad) 

A💗: check snap then 😉

P💗: AZZI ICE IS NEXT TO ME

       Had to save it so I could look at it privately 

Az💗: oh ya? What r u going to be doing when u look at it “privately” 😼

P💗: finna touch myself too it that’s for sure

        Need to see u in that new set in person

       Bring it to the cruise baby…

Az💗: woah what r u gonna do if I don’t 😩

P💗: oh you don’t wanna do that trust 

        be a good girl and listen 

Az💗: alright mommy 

P💗: BEUH

Az💗 I’m sorry u were asking for it with the “good girl” 

P💗: don’t act like u didn’t like it

Az💗: 🤭

P💗: I miss u so bad 

        Wish I was in u were in my bed rn 

Az💗: same

P💗: btw ur mom sent me photos of u today 

        Why she my literal plug 😭 

Az 💗: BRO GET OUT 

           Did she violate me 

P💗: that is actually impossible I fear 

        Ur too cute 

Az💗: ur cute 

P 💗: gonna be a lot cuter when ur in that tight bikini on the cruise 

Az💗: I don’t know how tight it will be if my literary family will be present 😭 

P💗: fine guess I’ll just have to take advantage of my time in the room 

Az💗: PAIGE!

P💗: ptpom? And cuddle? 

Az💗: I’m just gonna ignore that first one 

         (If ur good) 

P💗: alright now who’s the good girl 

Az💗: I guess we will have to wait and see 

         Omg I didn’t realize how late u kept me up

         I’m going to bed 

P💗: alright big head I’m so proud of u for graduating in 3 

       My academic weapon 💗

       Good night baby I love you 

Az💗: same baby

         Can’t believe u managed to actually graduate on time when ur illiterate 

        I love you too P 

        good night 

P💗: lowkey love you a little less after that

Az💗: 😐

P💗: kidding 💗💗💗💗

———

“Azzi you coming?” Aliyah’s voice echoed through the dorm. 

“Ya one second, I just feel like I’m forgetting something.” Azzi replied, scanning the room before adjusting her little black dress and fluffing her hair in the mirror.

It was only a few hours after graduation, and Azzi was going out to a grad party with Aliyah and some of the other girls in her communications class. 

Azzi had just gotten into the car when all of a sudden her phone chimed.

——

While Azzi was getting ready for the party, Paige had completely set up her dorm room in candles and Azzi’s favorite flowers to celebrate their graduation and especially Azzi graduating in 3. 

Paige was amazed by her girlfriend every day, but this was just a whole new level of adoration. 

Paige had finally finished setting up, after going right home after graduation. 

She had just assumed her and Azzi would have hung out afterward, she didn’t really feel the need to confirm. 

But when Azzi didn’t show up after 30 minutes of waiting, she started to get a little confused. 

She knew that Aliyah was going to a party with some of the other graduates, but parties had never really been Azzi’s thing, and Paige had assumed that Azzi would have told her if she was going. 

——

Back in the car, Azzi checks her phone. 

         —2 missed calls from p 💗 and 2 texts—

P💗: wya 😼

        U on ur way?

Az💗: I didn’t realize we had plans?

         I was going with Aliyah to that grad party 

P💗: wow alr 

Az💗: p? 

         I’m sorry? Like I didn’t realize u wanted to do something

P💗: it’s fine whatever 

       I just don’t get why u were all talking about how much u missed me last night and are surprised when I’m upset u didn’t come over.

       Like I thot it was mutual but ig not 

Az💗: ofc I want to see u, I can come over later!

         I’m sorry baby I thought I told you that I was going to the party, I knew I was forgetting something yesterday fuck.

P💗: it’s whatever don’t come over come over idrc 

       Have fun

Az💗: p come on wtf? It’s not that big of a deal, I just forgot to tell u 

         I still wanna see u 

         I miss u 

P💗: clearly not enough 

       Bye Azzi 

       I’ll talk to u later 

Az: paige come on don’t do this

      It was a mistake 

     Why do u have to stress me out like this I wanna see u 

    Seriously this is stupid 

                         —— read by P💗 ——

Az💗: really paige?

         I get that I made a mistake but it’s not like we had actual plans like come on

P💗: fuck az I said idc

Az 💗: why r u being like this 

          Like why r u tryna make me feel guilty 

          I said I’m sorry 

P💗: im not even doing nothing 😂😂?? 

        Just have fun

Az💗: paige u KNOW damn well ur making me upset 

         Like how am I gonna have fucking fun with u mad at me 

P💗: I don’t wanna fight with u

        I alr said I don’t care 

        Stop being dramatic and let it go

Az 💗: p ur being mean and unfair right now

P💗: I’m going to bed, take it how ever u want but stop texting me so I can sleep.

Az💗: alright paige I’m sorry 

         I never meant to hurt u

         I can’t come over later? I love you.

P💗: nah I’m all set Azzi. 

                      —— read by Azzi——

Azzi felt her heart sink as she shut off her phone. How was she supposed to celebrate when all she could think of was paige. 

————

When Azzi woke up, she felt hollow.

She turned to her side feeling the emptiness of the bed where the blonde lump usually laid. 

The bed felt cold without her in it.

Azzi’s head was pounding as she reached for her phone, rereading the entire conversation searching for where it went wrong.

She read it three times before sitting up and setting it on her side table.

She had really thought Paige would have texted her before she woke up. Apologizing for overreacting but she was really mad clearly.

At first Azzi felt horrible. 

The guilt was strong in her mind. She threw on a pair of Paige’s sweat pants and one of her team USA t-shirts and decided to go for a run to clear her mind.

As the morning stretched to afternoon, Azzi felt her guilt turn to anger.

She was pissed at Paige for not only ruining her graduation night, but for not even caring enough to text her the next day. And she had the audacity to get mad at her for “not caring.” 

By 3:00 Azzi was getting stressed. She had showered, even finished one of the books she was reading, but the suitcases by her door lay waiting for her in question.

Azzi and Paige had to leave for their cruise by 4:30 to get there by 8 yet still no text. 

Were they even going at this point?

By 4, Azzi was just about to text Paige when she heard her phone buzz.

———

P💗: I’m leaving in 15 to pick u up 

                     —— read by Az💗 ——

P💗: baby? 

        Is that ok?

Az💗: yup see u then 👍 

P💗: bruh 

Az💗: don’t call me bruh paige 

P💗: why r u dragging this out?

Az💗: u can’t be serious rn?

         U haven’t texted me all day.

         I have been sitting by my phone since literally ur last text waiting to see if u would text me yet nothing

        Like I made one fucking mistake and ur telling me im fucking dragging this out??

P💗: ur forgot we basically made plans i'm sorry i was upset 

Az💗: i get that u were upset, but I apologized and wanted to come over

         I didn’t even end up going to the stupid party and we both spent it alone cuz you were mad. 

          Like if u weren’t so damn stubborn this could have been prevented.

         U were a different person I didn’t even recognize u 

P💗: baby u know I love you come on 

       Stop with that

Az💗: ya I know P but u can’t just shut me out over something like that it’s not fair.

P💗: okay let’s just talk about it in the car bro

       I’m leaving now 

Az💗: istg paige if u call me bro one more time I will make u change rooms 

P💗: nah no way u change rooms 

Az💗: hah if u still think we are fucking ur gonna be really disappointed

P💗: ya we will see 😂

Az💗: I’m literally not even gonna sleep in the same bed as u at this point

         Like have fun by urself, hopefully they have a couch or u will be on the floor.

P💗: whatever u say baby

———

Azzi watched as paige’s car pulled into the driveway.

——

P💗: here

Az💗: I’m coming asshole 

P💗: damn really not giving up on this are u?

                   —— read by Az💗 ——

Azzi wobbled out to the car with her suitcase.

Paige watched, getting out of her car, opening the door for Azzi and taking her bag.

Azzi rolled her eyes at her but obliged, letting Paige put her bag in the trunk.

Paige felt a smirk curl onto her lips. She knew Azzi was upset but she couldn’t help herself but think about how good their makeup sex would be now that there was all this tension-not that Paige wanted any of this to happen, she hated when Azzi was upset.

When Paige finally joined Azzi in the car after cramming all the stuff in the car, she handed Azzi her unicorn neck pillow. 

“Thanks” Azzi said shortly, tugging it around her neck and leaning to look out the window away from paige.

“Do you have the stuff for your knee?” Paige asked, going through a list she made on her phone of things Azzi can’t forget.

“What about your compression sleeve?” She continued.

“I have everything Paige we can just go.” Azzi sighed, shutting her eyes and rubbing her temples as if to say Paige was giving her a headache. 

Paige smirked at the sight of her girlfriend, and her eyes made their way down to her bare thighs. She watches as Azzi lets her legs stretch out, her quads contracting and relaxing as she did. 

Azzi could feel Paige's eyes on her. 

“I'm not gonna talk to you Paige.” Azzi said even though her heart fluttered knowing Paige was looking at her. 

“Fine by me.” Paige said pressing play on her music letting “Love Language” by Sza fill the silence of the car. 

The two sat there not talking while Paige drove for the first hour. Azzi kept her eyes glued to the window, avoiding eye contact, as if the passing shapes were the interesting things in the world. Azzi refused to be the first to give in. 

An hour later, Azzi lets herself glance over to Paige who was focused on the road. 

Azzi felt herself relax at the sight of her girlfriends familiar features, the sharp angle of her jaw, the softness of her blonde hair, the way her eyes glistened under the light of the setting sun. Azzi could smell the tension on her, but she looked away before her glance could be considered staring. 

Immediately after looking back towards her spot on the window, she regretted taking that glance as the ache between her legs, that had been unfulfilled since the few days her girlfriend had been absent, grew.

Ironically, Paige too was feeling the heat of the moment. Every glance she would steal at Azzi was filled with pure desire and need. All the anger from last night had converted into something more charged, and when Paige got worked up well… 

After another 30 minutes of the car ride, Paige glanced over at Azzi who had fallen asleep, her mouth slightly open and her head tilted back. 

Paige’s heart melted seeing her girlfriend in such an innocent vulnerable moment. Paige loved waking up to Azzi’s sleeping face, and not seeing her the past few days made this moment all that much more meaningful. Paige moves her hand over to brush one of Azzi's curls out of her face, letting the pureness of her beauty sink in. 

With only an hour left in the car ride, Azzi wakes up a little disoriented, forgetting where she was. She looks around and her eyes immediately find Paige, bringing her complete comfort. She feels a pang of guilt at the idea that her girlfriend is probably tired too after driving the full way, but the guilt turns back to annoyance when she realizes she still hasn’t gotten an apology yet. 

Not wanting to give in just yet, Azzi decides to send Paige a quick text. 

Az💗: hi

Paige saw Azzi’s name pop up on her CarPlay, she glanced over to Azzi who was still looking out the window ignoring her. 

When they pull up to the red light, Paige checks her phone. 

P💗: hi

Az💗: i don’t forgive u 

          That’s why i'm texting you, so u can’t bring this up out loud but 

          I miss u 

P💗: I miss u too baby

Az💗: really? I thot u were mad still 

P💗: how could I possibly stay mad at such a pretty face

————

Azzi felt a blush reach her face at paige’s message

————

Az💗: well I’m not done being mad at u yet

          But I’m pausing so I can text u

P💗: it’s okay baby u are holding up very well

       U look very pretty right now too btw

Az💗: you look pretty too. 

          Like that shirt on u

P💗: what’s new 🤷‍♀️ 

         Also I got u a grad gift

         It’s a surprise tho

Az💗: stop im supposed to me mad at u rn 

P💗: hah and yet ur wet instead

Az💗: enough

P💗: So do you forgive me?

Az💗: no

———

The light changed back to green and Azzi put her phone back in the side door. 

Paige began cooking up a way to get Azzi to forgive her. 

Without removing her eyes from the road, Paige reached next to her side and let her hand drape across the top of Azzi's lower thigh. 

She smirked, feeling Azzi's weight shift underneath her, as she ran her fingers dangerously against the soft skin of her thigh. 

Azzi felt herself grow needy, the warmth of Paige's fingers spreading to her insides. 

Azzi could feel Paige's hand creep higher up her thigh, slowly inching closer to where she needed her most. Paige massaged her skin with her thumb in tight small circles on her inner thigh. 

Azzi accidentally let a soft moan slip out as her hand inched closer to her heat. 

Realizing she had allowed herself to enjoy this a little too much, she pushed Paige's hand away, stopping it as her hand hovered over the throbbing pressure between her legs. 

“Paige.” Azzi warned, as Paige threw her head back against the seat in frustration. 

Paige flicked her eyes away from the road to look at her girlfriend. 

“Az” paige said, letting her face soften upon looking at the way Azzi’s curious eyes wandered and searched her face for an answer. 

“Look.” Paige started. “I am sorry Azzi, i shouldn't have treated you like that yesterday, i wasn't fair.” Paige confessed at a mumble, part of herself not liking the idea of admitting she was wrong. 

Azzi sighed, “It's okay baby, I just hate it when you're upset with me.” Azzi softly stated, reaching her hand out and squeezing the blondes gently. 

“You didn't do anything wrong Azzi, I just wanted to see you after graduation , and I guess I got a little too wrapped up in the idea that you were coming over and I took it out on you when I found out you had other plans.” Paige admitted. “Also I might have been a little embarrassed cuz I may or may not have lit a couple of candles for you.” Paige sighed, her face blushing. 

Azzi, turned her body so she was facing her more directly, “Aw baby youre so cute. But just to be clear i didn't even go to the party, i went home cuz i was so stressed out about you.” Paige felt the guilt rush over her as Azzi admitted that to her. 

Paige’s head hung, “I'm sorry you had to leave, I am, honestly, but I just don't get why you didn't want to celebrate with me.” 

“Paige, are you serious right now? I literally wanted to come over, and if you had asked you could have come, and i would have said yes in an instant. If you had just sent me a message, instead of trying to guilt trip me, and make me feel bad, I would have been to your house in seconds." Azzi said, reaching up and brushing a strand of blonde hair away from Paige's face, framing her eyes. 

“I know azzi, i was acting crazy, i knew you would have come to be with me, i guess it was just the fact that i wasn't the first person you wanted to be with, i dont know it's stupid.” Paige tried to brush off the embarrassment as she said that, her eyes staying focused on the road. Azzi feels her heart melt at the sight of her blonde girlfriend being so vulnerable and open in front of her. 

“I am so sorry baby, I just thought it would make sense for me to hang out with the girls from my class since this is probably the last time i'm gonna see them, you know? Like I assumed I would be seeing you later that night. I just feel like you took it a little too far like it was a little toxic idk." Azzi said, watching Paige's face react to it. 

Paige felt a little taken aback by Azzi’s comment. 

“Az, you know i love you, and you don't even know how sorry i am, i'll never do it again i promise.” Paige said, turning a little to look at her. 

Paige moved her hand to caress Azzi’s curls, her finger brushing against Azzi's neck, sending shivers down her spine that was enough to make her want to unbuckle, climb onto Paige's lap, and take her right there. But somehow she managed to maintain herself, and simply said, “better not.” 

They spent what was left of the car ride with their hands all over each other. Azzi remained a bit more to herself, but when paige placed her hand on her lap, she moved her hand and let them linger over paige’s, tracing her initials onto her palm. 

When they pulled up to the dock, Paige shifted in her seat to turn to the younger girl, her hand still on Azzi's thigh. 

“Your family is gonna be here soon?” She asked moving her hand up to sweep the curls back behind Azzi's ear. 

Azzi blushes as she pulls out her home to check. 

“Ya, they said to just go on without them and they would meet us for dinner, they are running a little late apparently Jon forgot his suitcase.” Paige giggled at the reminder of her family dynamic, the one she had always felt so welcomed to. 

“Alright pretty, you stay here, k?” Azzi nodded in response, watching as Paige left and went to the trunk to grab their bags, and lug them over to the boat's entrance. She went back and opened Azzi’s door, but as she walked, Azzi couldn't help herself but gawk at the way Paige's sweatpants and how low they hung on her hips, the veins in her hands, and the way her long nimble finger wrapped around the bag she was holding. 

Azzi gulped when Paige opened the door.. Fuck she was horny. 

Paige’s hand rested on the small of her back as she led her towards the entrance of the cruise ship, azzi paused, turning to look Paige in the eyes.

“Thank you for bringing our bags in and driving, I appreciate it. But.” Azzi looks away as the last word comes out, Paige eyes her cautiously, “but what azzi?”

“I am still a little annoyed with you though, just warning you.” azzi said, which surprised her as Paige's tense body relaxed. 

Paige turns her and lets her hand pull azzi in closer to her side as they stand in the line to board. Her hand slides down and wraps around the front of her, resting just below Azzi's belly button piercing, the other one moving down to squeeze her ass. 

Azzi blushed, swatting at her hand, but her actions juxtaposed it, leaning back into page letting her warmth absorb her. 

“I feel like you won't be saying that later.” Azzi feels her breath hitch as Paige's voice is sharp in her ear. 

“Yeah?” Azzi gulps, her hand reaching back and coming in contact with the exposed skin between Paige's pants and her crop top. 

“How long do you really think you will hold out Azzi?” Paige questioned dominantly. 

Azzi chose to leave the question unanswered as she created some distance between them when walking in. 

When they reached the check in desk, Azzi could feel Paige's hands wander over her body. Azzi, who obviously was much more organized than Paige, checked in, providing the receptionist with the details of their trip, and the other people in their party that would be arriving later. Azzi tried to keep herself focused, but Paige was making it pretty difficult, her fingers tracing over her back, her eyes burning into the side of her head as she conversed with the lady who was checking them in. 

When the lady turned around to get them their room keys, Azzi turned to look at Paige, who was already staring at her puffy lips, licking her own and smirking at her. Azzi’s heart rate sped up, and she knew she would have to get her back for pulling this little stunt on her. 

Azzi leads them to their room, and Azzi forces Paige to carry both of their bags so she would keep her hands away from Azzi’s body. As the two of them open the door to the room Azzi begins to take herself at home, unpacking her clothes, while Paige on the other hand starts walking around the room, looking in the shower, at the beds, and even on the balcony. 

Azzi gives her a look as if to say “What are you doing.” and paige knowingly responds “sorry im just looking to see all the places i could fuck you in.” Paige smirked, walking up behind Azzi and trailing her fingers along Azzi’s arm. Azzi rolled her eyes and Paige whispered in her ear,

“Common Azzi, i said i was sorry, didn't  know it would be a crime for me to wanna celebrate graduating with my girlfriend.”  Azzi is silent, taking it in as Paige's hands trail down her arms and clutch her hands swinging them slightly. 

“Just wanna have a nice time on this cruise with my girl.” She continues smiling at their reflection in the mirror in front of them and licking her lips as she moves her head to lean on Azzi’s shoulder. 

Azzi studies her face and neck, she can tell she wants her bad, and Paige is not even trying to hide it. 

Azzi on the other hand, although better at hiding it, needed her just as badly. 

Paige tilted her head so her lips brushed against Azzi's neck, traveling upward and pressing an open mouth kiss on her dimple. Azzi’s hand found its way to Paige's shoulder, as her heart fluttered. 

Paige knew she had her in a choke hold and kept going, “didn't mean to treat you like that baby, i just wanna be near you all the time, i can't help it.”she whispered against her ear, letting her lips brush against it. 

Azzi walks back a few steps towards the bed, before she goes to sit down. Paige follows her like a lost puppy, seductively pulling Azzi’s legs apart so she can stand between them. 

Azzi looks up at her with wide eyes full of desire as she puts her own arms on either side of her hips on the bed. Azzi leaned her head back making eye contact with Paige, staring at her with needy hooded eyes. As azzi leans back, her jaw clenches, showing off the sharpness of her jawline. Immediately,the wetness between Paige's legs becomes overwhelming, and Paige is unbelievably aware of the switch azzi has just made. 

“Ima make it up to you baby, do you want that? Want me to make you feel good?”Azzi doesn't respond, but Azzi keeps her eyes on Paige. Looking up at her with her head tilted as if to say, “yeah?” biting her lip and looking down at herself all spread out for paige. 

“I'm gonna get you so right baby? Paige says as she leans down tracing her finger along Azzi’s thick muscular thighs. She licks her lips, smirking down at her girlfriend. “Just forgive me baby.” she whispers, watching as Azzi adjusts herself so she is propped up on her elbows with her body more accessible. She moves one of her hands to slightly fist at the hem of her shirt with an overtly innocent look plastered on her face. She felt like Paige had had enough of her teasing. 

“I don't know paigey, you made me really upset you know.” she said, dragging out the last letter so her tongue would trace her lips slowly, still looking up pouty. 

Paige moved her hand to the soft skin of Azzi's neck, stroking it gently. She brings her other free hand to tilt Azzi's jaw up, her thumb on her puffy bottom lip.

Paige leans forward, “I'm so sorry princess, I love you baby lemme do you right please.” she whispers into her ear, flicking her eyes to watch azzi-who thought she couldn't be seen- as she bites her lip letting her eyes roll back into her head. 

Paige raises back to her full height, peering over azzi with a knowing smirk as she pouts up at her, both of them fighting intense aches in their cores. 

“You want me so bad? My sweet girl, so innocent huh? Paige says tugging at azzi’s plump bottom lip. 

Azzi nods innocently, smiling.“Keep going.” she whispers. 

Paige knows exactly how to rile her up. 

“Such a beautiful girl, mmm drives me crazy,” Paige groans as Azzi takes off her hoodie, her eyes focused on Paige's, going back to her position to let Paige continue. 

“Mhm, that's it baby, such a good girl for me huh?” she says as Azzi stands up to slide off her pants, taking her time turning around so Paige can take it all in. 

By the time she is sitting back at the edge of the bed, Paige's mouth feels dry, and her pussy feels wet. 

“My smart girl. graduated in 3 years didn't you?”Azzi nods and puts up her foot to make Paige slide her socks off for her. 

“Whatever you want princess.” She smirks as she leans forward and delicately pills them off. 

Paige can feel the sweat slide down her back as the tension builds between them. 

“So fucking perfect, just wanna fuck you all the time.” Azzi's expression contorts into a teasing “really?”. And Paige doubles down “can't even control myself.” she says as her hands hover over the brunette's body. 

Paige lifts her leg to peel off her other sock, highlighting the swell of her ass. 

“Mmm that fat ass too.” Paige groans as she feels herself get wet. Her head is spinning, and Azzi, who is now only in a t-shirt and panties can tell. 

Azzi lifts one arm and slides it behind Paige's neck to pull her in towards her lips, letting them brush against her ear, “ok baby, i forgive you.” 

A smirk spreads onto Paige's face as azzi continues, “Wanna take this off me baby?” she asks with need dripping from her core. 

“Fuck az.” Paige groans, licking her lips eagerly as she leans forward to gently pull the shirt over her girlfriends head. 

Azzi leans back slightly now that she is fully exposed, her lingerie in full view, she separates her legs smirking. 

Paige’s jaw drops in disbelief as her parted thighs revealing a new pair of lingerie. 

“What happened to me sleeping on the couch huh?” Paige questioned as she studied the brand new red set that displayed Azzi's perky breasts, her toned stomach, and her piercing that shimmered under the light. 

Considering that they had just had an argument, and only had just made up everything clicked when she saw Azzi's state all laid out for her. 

Paige tips her head backward to stare at the ceiling shaking her head while rubbing her jaw and letting out a groan that makes azzi giggle. 

Azzi, still staring up at her girlfriend, waiting for her to make a move, holds both of her hands now as they make eye contact, 

“Wow so you just been tryna rile me up all day huh? You're such a freak Azzi Fudd.” Paige tuts with a smirk. 

“Paigeee” azzi whines, “what are you talking about sweetie?” she replies innocently, tugging at her shirt, pouting. 

“You dont wanna touch me baby?” she asks and Paige can barely believe it's a real thought in her head. 

Paige leans her head down to Azzi's ear, her hand resting lightly on the back of Paige's head whispering, “enough baby, you know imma touch you.” Paige says, her lips attaching to the soft spot under her ear. “But you gotta promise you're gonna be a good girl for me though ok? Can you do that Azzi?” 

“What if I don't wanna.” Azzi admits watching as Paige shakes her head in disbelief. 

“I think you're gonna wanna be good. Cuz you know im gonna fuck you so good.” paige says, watching as Azzi’s eyes scan down her body. 

Azzi’s hands travel up under her shirt, rubbing up and down on her bare stomach. 

She lets out a breathy moan, “Paigey?” she starts. 

Paige looks down at her, shuddering under her touch. 

Azzi continues to caress her lower stomach and whispers, “I promise I'll be a really good girl for you Paige,” batting her eyelashes innocently. 

“Yeah? didn't take much convincing huh? Need me that bad princess? Want me to fuck you good?” 

Azzi nods, standing up and wrapping arms around Paige's neck, hand gripping the back of her head pulling her into a kiss. Their lips connect with an absolute fire, the tension from the past day spilling out between their lips. Azzi licks at Paige's bottom lip, and Paige sucks in her tongue as her hands travel down to rub her ass. 

“Missed you bad.” azzi says when they finally pulled away, lips puffy and swollen, eyes hooded with desire. 

The blonde smiles and connects their lips again, the passion overflowing as Paige bites and pulls on her bottom lip. 

Paige’s lips travel down, leaving small open mouthed kisses from her jawline, and traveling down to her neck. 

She licks a long stripe down Azzi's stomach, outlining her abs before stopping at the band of her panties. 

Paige hooks her finger into them, letting them fall to the floor. 

Azzi looks down to watch the way Paige looks at pussy like she has been starved for years. Paige gets on her knees, so she is the one staring upwards a t her beautiful girlfriend in front of her. 

She separates Azzi’s legs gently and reaches her finger up to spread apart her tan folds, exposing the soft pink of her clit. 

“Prettiest pussy in the world”, she shakes her head, continuing, “she belongs to me.” Paige says to her pussy as Azzi smirks, “all yours. Now pls touch me, I need you so bad." Azzi whines pushing at Paige's head. 

Paige wraps her arms around the back of Azzi's thighs to stabilize herself, as she presses her tongue against Azzi's pussy, running it through her folds and picking up her slick. Azzi moans against the contact, pushing herself farther against her. 

Paige’s hands travel up to cup Azzi's ass, squeezing and listening to Azzi let out a soft moan. Paige’s tongue digs deeper against her, finding her clit and swiping against it. 

Her tongue flicks back and forth, and Paige transitions between the flicks, small tight circles, and sucking at it, releasing it with a pop. 

Azzi moans loudly, her hand tangling in Paige's hair as she pushes her girlfriend closer so her face is suffocated by her cunt. 

Paige goes down like she hasn't eaten in months, licking at her, sucking at her, even running her teeth gently against her. 

“Love the way you taste baby.” Paige says pulling away gently to catch her breath and shove Azzi onto the bed. 

Azzi moans as Paige climbs on top of her and flattens her tongue against her clit, lapping at it gently. She moves her head down, licking from her clit down to her entrance. 

Azzi can feel her pussy clench as Paige runs over her entrance teasingly with her tongue. 

“Please fuck-want you inside of me” Azzi says desperately and paige just smirks against her pussy. 

“What's the magic word,” Paige teases, her finger running through Azzi's slick. Azzi doesn't even have the chance to answer, as she pushes Paige's tongue into her. 

Paige lets it slide, and fucks her with her tongue, letting it plunge in and out of her. Azzi moans loudly as her tongue squelches against her walls, the feeling of the warmth was too much for her, and after only a few minutes of Paige's pounding into her, she is a pile of moans. 

“Fuck im close Paige.” she moans. 

Paige pulls her tongue out of her and flips them over so Azzi is sitting on her stomach. 

Paige wraps her hands around Azzi's ass and scotts her up so her pussy is now hovering over her face. 

“Sit,” Paige says dominantly. And Azzi looks a little self conscious at first, not wanting to completely crush her, but eventually the desire between her legs is too deep, and Paige's strong arms pull her down so she is now riding her tongue. 

Azzi moans loudly at the new angle, feeling Paige's tongue hit against her g spot as she fucked it into her. Azzi was grinding down on her, feeling Paige's nose brush against her clit. 

She moaned,her walls beginning to tighten and her pussy sucked up Paige's tongue as it bobbed in and out of her. 

“Gonna cum Paige.” she moaned her hands coming around on either side of her, her tits dangling in Paige’s face as she continued to fuck her through her orgasim. 

Soon enough Azzi’s white syrup was pouring out of her and paige was drinking up every last drop, fucking her through it. 

Azzi flopped off of her face so she was laying next to her. 

They lay there for a moment catching their breath. 

“You ready?” Azzi asks eagerly, laughing as she notices the cum on her nose, leaning forward and licking it off. 

“For what princess?” she asked, but Azzi was already straddling her and sliding off her pants.

“My turn to show my remorse.” Azzi smirked as Paige let out a breathy moan as the cool air hit her wet cunt. 

“All this from eating me out? You really are whipped.” 

Azzi wiggled herself down, situating herself so she was between her legs, aligning herself with Paige's core. 

She starts to place gentle kisses on Paige's inner thighs, feeling the heat radiating off of her. 

She placed a kiss on her pussy, before spreading it open with her fingers and licking a long strip through her. She lapped at her clit in soft kitten licks, taking in the taste of her arousal. 

Paige moaned, running her fingers over the back of Azzi's neck, tangling them in her hair. 

Azzi ran her finger through her wetness, letting it get completely soaked, before she fucked it into her listening as paige moaned at the contact. 

Azzi continued fucking the one finger into her, her tongue flicking against her clit. 

Paige moaned, desperate for more contact. 

“Please more. Need more princess. You're so good to me.” Paige praised, as she pushed Azzi's mouth against her clit with more force, so she was now sucking on it. 

With Paige’s words, Azzi added two more fingers, fucking them in and out of her at a fast rhythm while Paige shoved her face into her cunt. 

“Fuckkk.” she moaned, throwing her head back as she felt her walls start to suction around Azzi's fingers. 

Azzi pressed down her other hand on Paige's lower stomach, causing her walls to release, and her orgasim to spill over her with a loud moan, her cum spilling out onto Azzi's fingers. 

Azzi fucked her through it, not stopping until Paige was squirming underneath her. 

“Who's the good girl now?” Azzi asked smartly, as she ran her fingers through Paige's sensitive clit. 

Paige, who was still tired from just having Azzi’s fingers pound in and out of her, was not willing to give up that easily, she moved Azzi's fingers away from her clit towards Azzi's mouth. “Still you.” she said as she shoved them into Azzi’s mouth, melting a little as Azzi held eye contact with her and sucked Paige's juices off of them. 

—----

An hour or 2 later, after the girls had finished unpacking, and getting ready for dinner, they met Azzi’s family down by one of the cruise restaurants. 

“You look so beautiful tonight.” Paige said as they walked down the stairs towards the door. 

“You do too, baby.” Azzi smiled, and Paige poked her dimple lovingly. 

Making their way over, they finally spotted Azzi's family in the distance. They all exchanged hugs, and stories before finally making their way into the restaurant. 

“Mrs. Fudd.” Paige said, pulling out Azzi's chair for her. 

“Thank you Mrs. Bueckers.” she mocked as she sat down. 

The night was filled with laughter and stories of Azzi's childhood, the team next year, classes, and just day to day anecdotes. 

Paige couldn’t imagine herself anywhere else than with this family, at this table. 

Paigee loved every part of Azzi, from her family, to her, to the way she would refuse to let either of them bring their phones when they snuck away to one of the islands, or when she would force Paige to watch Frozen with them in the room before they went to sleep the second night. 

Paige knew Azzi was the one for her, from the minute she saw her, and no fight they could ever have would ever change that. 

[fluentmoviequoter]

All By Myself, Drowning in My Fears

I used another one of the amazing Tim ideas by @nevereclipse! I hope you enjoy it.🤍

Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!reader

Summary: Tim hides his nightmares from everyone, even you, until he realizes that holding you while he sleeps keeps the dreams away.

Warnings: angst, nightmares, death, blood, fluff and comfort

Word Count: 2.4k+ words

A/N: Title is from Nightmares by Ellise!

Masterlist Directory | Tim Bradford Masterlist | Request Info/Rules

Tim yawns in the driver’s seat and immediately feels Lucy’s eyes on him.

“What?” he asks.

“You’re tired,” she replies. “Want me to drive?”

“No.”

She nods, then presses, “Why are you tired? If you have trouble sleeping, there’s so many things that can help with that. Have you tried melatonin?”

“No.”

“What about-“

“Chen, focus. Red Mustang just ran two red lights in a row while you were talking.”

“What red Mustang?” she questions as she leans toward the dash. “There isn’t one, is there?”

“No, but if they’re had been, someone could have been killed.”

“You could have just told me to stop,” she grumbles. “But, seriously, you should talk to someone if it’s a consistent sleep problem.”

“I only have one consistent problem right now.”

“Me!? That’s just mean.”

You blink, then immediately snap your eyes closed. It’s the middle of the night, yet your phone is ringing beside your bed. After feeling around blindly, you grasp it and answer the call.

“Hello?” you ask against your pillow.

“Can you come over?” Tim asks.

Sitting up, you feel wide awake. Tim sounds breathless and like he desperately needs you, so you kick the sheets off your legs and answer, “I’m on my way. What’s going on?”

“I just- I need to see you.”

You don’t change or end the phone call; just slide on the closest pair of shoes and walk to your car. Tim’s breathing evens out on the other end of the line, and you focus on him until you walk onto his porch.

Tim opens the door before you knock and pulls you into his arms. He drops his face to your neck, and you feel his breath against your skin as you hold him. Whatever happened to make him call you over at one in the morning isn’t over, and for Tim to be this open and affectionate, it must have been bad.

“You’re okay,” you promise softly, brushing your fingers through his hair.

“I’m sorry,” he says against you.

“Don’t be. I’m here for you, whenever and whatever you need, Tim, you know that.”

Tim nods as he pulls back. He slides his fingers between yours and leads you to his bedroom. You kick your shoes off by the door, then sit on the edge of his bed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you offer.

“No,” Tim answers immediately. “I can’t.”

“That’s okay,” you assure him, even though you’re desperate to know what’s on his mind. “What do you need?”

“You.”

You smile and take Tim’s other hand as you promise, “Well, I’m right here.”

Tim lays beside you, keeping you close as you hold him, and drifts to sleep quickly. You lie awake for nearly an hour, watching his chest rhythmically rise and fall as you brush your fingers through his hair. You love Tim and would lay here forever if it kept him from hurting. Yet, you know as well as he does that it’s impossible to keep someone from the dangers and pain he faces.

You spend a week of nights at Tim’s house. He hasn’t told you or anyone else about the nightmares that plague him. How every time he closes his eyes, he stares death in the face, feels the blood of people he loves run between his fingers, and has lost you more times than he can count. The worst part, he thinks, is that it doesn’t fade when he wakes. The fear, the heartbreak, the confusion, and utter devastation settle deep within him. When he wakes alone, he’s defenseless against the battle that is reliving it all. Most nights, he can’t remember where he is or gauge what is real until the sun rises over Los Angeles. It’s killing him slowly, he thinks, robbing him of his sleep, pulling him away from reality, and forcing him to decide between telling you why he needs you close or resigning himself to losing you nightly.

Tim tries to stay awake after you text him that you’re working late. He watches past football games, tries to stay awake through your favorite movie, and even has a midnight cup of coffee. Yet, he drifts to sleep uncomfortably on the couch and doesn’t see it coming.

As if he merely blinked and awoke oceans away, his brain transforms the living room around him into Afghanistan. His team is dying around him, and he’s paralyzed. He can’t save them or even call out to warn them about the coming attack. As their blood creates rivers in the sand, he hears a helicopter. Backup is here, but it’s too late; everyone is gone, except for Tim, the one man who didn’t deserve to be saved because he couldn’t save the rest. Boots thunder in his ears as he looks at the carnage surrounding him.

When another soldier grabs him, he expects to see his commander or another higher-ranking officer ready to scream questions in his face, not noticing the tears tracking through the dirt on his face.

“Hey, look at me.”

Tim looks up quickly at the sound of your voice. You look the same, even in the camouflage uniform Tim knows isn’t yours. Your hands raise toward his face, the comforting smile he’s grown to crave spread across your lips. Before you touch him to pull him against you, you stop. As your eyes widen, Tim lurches forward to hold your arms. He looks down, and the growing red stain on your abdomen darkens rapidly.

“No, no, no,” Tim repeats, holding you up as your knees buckle.

“Tim,” you whisper, moving your hands to the wound. “What did you do?”

“I’m right here,” he promises, removing his shirt to press against you. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

“You already did,” you accuse.

“Hold on,” Tim begs, ignoring the tears on his face as your blood soaks through the fabric and coats his hands. “Hold on for me.”

“Tim,” you say. “Tim, hey. Baby, c’mon.”

Tim blinks, and you’re standing above him, your eyes wide as you look at him. His hands leap instinctively toward your abdomen, but it’s just you. No blood, no fading heartbeat, just warm skin beneath your shirt. Your hands are on his shoulders, and you exhale sharply as he leans up.

“Nightmare?” you ask kindly.

Tim looks around and remembers his plan to stay up all night, his unwillingness to deal with the nightmares but his inability to tell you about them. He nods, and his hands move from your stomach as he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you against him.

“What are you doing here?” he asks, his hands wandering over your skin as you lay beside him on the too-small couch.

“I just wanted to check on you. I drove by and the lights were on,” you answer. “Do- does this happen often?”

Tim inhales raggedly, at war with himself. He’s tired of spending nights alone, drowning in his fear of losing you and everything else he knows. “Every night you’re not here.”

“How long?”

“They’ve gotten worse,” Tim whispers. “Since we met.”

“I’ll be here every night if it helps you, Tim. You don’t have to deal with this alone.”

“It feels so real. Everyone dies, and when I wake up I expect to be there, to smell their blood when I raise my hands.”

“Well, I can promise that you won’t lose me,” you reply, catching his hand to kiss his calloused palm. “Not without a fight, at least.”

“I can’t ask you to stay.”

“And I can’t let you go through this anymore.”

Months later, Tim gets attached to a homicide call an hour before his twelve-hour shift is supposed to end. As soon as he enters the scene, he knows his night is far from over. Between securing the scene, aiding CSI, canvassing the neighbourhood, and following lead after lead, his twelve hours quickly become twenty.

“7-Adam-19, approaching the Shell station to obtain surveillance video,” Lucy radios before yawning. “Think they’d give us a discount on energy drinks?”

“About as likely as our shooters being on camera,” Tim grumbles before he slams the door. “Good morning,” he tells the store attendant, “we’re here to get your video from last night? A detective called earlier?”

“Yes, sir,” the man answers. “Detective Lopez; she sounded pretty. I’ll get the tape for you.”

Tim nods, then turns to look at the store. He thinks they are only an hour or so behind the suspect, but he can’t be sure. It’s nearing 4 in the morning, and he’d prefer to be in bed with you. Yet, he’s standing in a convenience store that looks like it hasn’t been cleaned since the last time he responded to a call here over a month ago.

“Here you go, officers,” the man says as he returns. “Let me know if you need more from me.”

“Will do,” Lucy answers. “Thanks for your help.”

“7-Lincoln-20, all officers who have been on shift for over sixteen hours, return to the station,” Sergeant Grey alerts over the radio. “You can pick up tomorrow at 0900 hours.”

“Finally,” Lucy sighs.

Tim looks at his watch and frowns. By the time he gets home, you’ll be awake and preparing to leave for the day. So, he has to brave the nightmares without you for a few hours sleep or find a way to stay with you, even if it means staying awake.

“Hello?” you ask as you answer a call from an unknown number.

“Hi, this is Detective Angela Lopez,” a woman replies.

“Is Tim okay?” you inquire immediately, not caring that he hasn’t introduced you to his friends or colleagues.

“Well… he’s asleep in an empty office,” she begins.

“I’ll be right there.”

You hang up and rush out of your bathroom, in the middle of getting ready, to help Tim. When you enter the lobby of the police station, a woman in a blazer waves you over like you’re a walking angel.

“Where is he?” you say, forgoing any greeting or introduction.

“Second door on the left,” she answers as she leads you into the station. “Thank you. Take care of him.”

You nod before you open the door and close it carefully behind you. Your chest tightens as you watch Tim thrash in the office chair he’s slumped in. This is worse than what you saw in his house the first night, and you can’t imagine what kind of pain and fear he must be feeling. You walk to his side but decide not to touch him this time. After saying his name several times to no avail, you nervously tap your fingers against your side as you decide what to do.

“No,” Tim mumbles before saying something else with your name in it.

“Wake up, Tim,” you demand, louder than before. “It’s just a nightmare.”

The moment your fingers touch his forearm, Tim’s eyes snap open, and he sits up straight like he’s been called to attention. You pull your hand back and prepare to ask if he’s okay – even though you can see that he isn’t – but don’t get the words out before you see the sheen of tears in Tim’s eyes as he looks at you.

“I can’t keep doing this,” he says.

“Doing what?” you inquire, reaching toward him.

Tim rolls the chair back and stands out of your reach. “It wasn’t like this before. I could sleep through the night.”

“And you think breaking up with me will fix it?” you ask, trying your hardest to conceal the hurt you feel.

“I- I don’t know.”

“Do you want to try it?”

Tim blinks, forcing several tears from his eyes before he wipes them away. “You seem okay with that.”

“I don’t want to break up,” you explain, “but I want you to be happy and healthy. If me leaving will change this, make you feel better… I love you enough to do it.”

Tim doesn’t reply, and you nod as you step back. “Call me if you change your mind, okay? I’ll do anything, Tim, I’m here for you.”

Your hand is on the door handle when he whispers, “It hurts.”

“Then let’s find something to make it hurt less,” you suggest, turning toward him. “But don’t isolate yourself just to deal with it alone.”

“I've tried. There’s nothing that makes it stop,” he exclaims. “Nothing but you!”

Your brows furrow, and then everything makes sense. The middle of the night calls, constant invitations to stay with him instead of going home, and the way he lets you hold him. You’re the only way Tim sleeps without nightmares, like a human dream catcher that wraps your arms around him and keeps him grounded.

“But I can’t always be with you,” you add. Tim nods, and you decide, “Then we find a way to make you feel like I’m always beside you.”

“I can’t ask you to do that.”

You walk back to Tim’s side and lay your hand over his heart, your fingers splayed beneath his badge. “I’m always close, here, even when I’m miles away. Okay? And I’ll do whatever it takes to help you remember that, even in your sleep.”

Tim nods, and his hand rises to cover yours.

“What do you dream about when I’m beside you?”

Tim finally smiles, a tiny quirking of his lips, before he answers, “A different life.”

“That’s not a very good answer,” you tease. “Because I dream about you, but if you don’t feel the same, I guess I should find a new topic.”

“Will you come over tonight?” Tim asks.

“Of course. I’ll even make dinner.”

“Why are you here? How’d you know to come?” Tim suddenly remembers.

“Intuition. And Angela Lopez called me.”

Tim groans and drops his head to your shoulder. “I didn’t want anyone to know.”

“She was worried,” you point out. “I’ll keep your secret. And the bed warm, apparently.”

“Get out,” Tim demands, failing to hide his smile as he stands up.

“I’ll see you tonight,” you say, rising to kiss him. “Be safe.”

“Always. I love you.”

“I love you,” you answer before you leave the office and walk toward the exit.

“Tim!” someone yells.

You stop and look over your shoulder. A female officer, who you assume to be Lucy Chen, rushes toward Tim with a small paper bag.

“This herbal tea works wonders when I have trouble sleeping, you should really try it.”

“Thanks,” he answers flatly. “But I think I found a way to deal with it.”

You smile and continue walking, knowing that you are Tim Bradford’s choice of comfort and safety, even as Lucy cheers, “So you admit there was a problem!”

[salaimoi]

𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒅𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓 — 𝒃𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒆 𝒆𝒊𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒉

[˚୨୧⋆. 𝒔𝒚𝒑𝒏𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒔] after his wife’s death, you became toji fushiguro’s only reliant shoulder. however, unbeknownst to you, your deceased friend’s ex-husband had ulterior motives in mind when he began to pursue you.

[˚୨୧⋆. 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆] angst

[˚୨୧⋆. 𝒘𝒄] 2.k

[˚୨୧⋆. 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔] yellow is reader’s pov, blue is toji’s pov. it might sound repetitive and rushed bc i just wanted to get this out of my drafts. i know billie’s song came out like ages ago so it wouldn’t make sense to release this any later than it already is

𓂃 ོ𓂃 Things fall apart, and time breaks your heart. I wasn't there, but I know.

toji always reassured you a million times; he wasn’t heartbroken over his split with his ex-wife, not in the slightest. he rarely opened up about his past, let alone his previous relationships. and yet, deep down, you knew he hadn’t properly processed their rupture.

the most he ever disclosed to you was the fact that there was nothing left to salvage in his old relationship — so he moved on, and so did she. 

but was that the entire truth? 

you noticed the prolonged glances he would take when opening his wallet. the empty look behind his eyes when he stared down at his naked ring finger. even the faint sniffling at night that he tried convincing you were nothing more than allergies. but you knew he was silently mourning her. 

her – the real love of his life.

She was my girl. I showed her the world, but fell out of love and we both let go. ⋆࿐

i made it my life goal to tend to her happiness. the only reason for my very existence was to see that she had everything she could ever want. hell, that’s the only thing i’ve ever been good at.

i never kept anything from her — except my line of work. i couldn’t bring myself to tell her the man she fell in love with was a deadbeat mercenary who bathed in the blood of others for a living. as much as i tried to protect her from that side of my life, she eventually went digging her nose where it wasn’t needed. 

the aftermath of her discovering the truth about my hidden agenda came at the price of our relationship. 

she couldn’t withstand the constant pain of being by my side any longer, to turn in bed only to see a bastard by her side. she wholeheartedly believed that the man that now stood before her was no longer the one she fell in love with. 

somehow i didn’t blame her.

She was cryin’ on my shoulder. All I could do was hold her.

i still remember it so vividly — how her body trembled against mine like a leaf. tears coursed down her cheeks as she clung to me like a lifeline, seeking comfort in the midst of her anguish. as selfish as it may sound, the weight of her sorrow became almost too much to bear. 

i couldn't offer excuses or apologies; these were empty gestures that wouldn't alleviate the agony she felt at that moment. instead, i stood there, silently holding her, offering my presence as the only comfort.

the guilt washed over me in waves as i cradled her, feeling her heart shatter a little more with each sob. i knew i was the cause of her pain, yet i couldn’t tell her the whole truth. all i could do was hold her, wishing i could undo the past.

𓂃 ོ𓂃 Only made us closer until July.

the moment he began pursuing you when enough time had gone by, it immediately felt wrong. he was your friend’s ex-husband, after all. toji had never looked at you twice before, and now, he suddenly had lustful eyes for you? 

you eventually conceded because you wanted to be there for him, giving him the benefit of the doubt that he had no ulterior motives. but one way or another, every conversation at dinner circled back to her. 

“oh she loved mashed potatoes.” 

“fun fact, she had a strawberry allergy.” 

“did you know this brand of vanilla ice cream was her favorite?”

and as much as it pained you, you became a reliant ear for him — someone who would listen to all the little details he swore he had forgotten the day she divorced him. even if every bone in your body wanted to run in the opposite direction, far, far away from him, you stayed. 

maybe all he needs is time, you told yourself.

right?

Now I know that you love me. You don't need to remind me. I should put it all behind me, shouldn't I? ⋆࿐

your affection always remained a constant in my turbulent world, like a gentle rain that falls softly even amidst the storm. but the longer the internal storm went on, the more ravenous the regret and guilt raged on. i found myself unable to fully comprehend the depth of your love for me, but deep down, i knew that your love was unwavering. 

i knew that in order to truly move on, i had to let go of the past and embrace the present; you represented that fresh start i so urgently needed. but the thought of her still lingered, a constant reminder of what once was but should no longer be. it was as if i was being consumed by my own memories, unable to break free. as if a part of me still longed for the past. 

the weight of my conflicting emotions burdened my every waking moment, leading me to push you away with no explanation. feelings for the both of you coexisted, and i couldn't fully commit to one without betraying the other. every time i looked at you, guilt would wash over me for putting you through this hell.

 likewise, every time i looked at her picture, i felt like a traitor for ever moving on as soon as i did.

But I see her in the back of my mind all the time. Just like a fever, like I’m burning alive, like a sign. ⋆࿐

beneath the mask of indifference, i was plagued by shame. it was hard to accept that the girl who once consumed my thoughts was no longer part of my life, and looking at you, i realized that your love knew no bounds; that wasn’t enough for me. 

i hadn’t stopped loving her. 

it felt like a fever that never broke. an unrelenting heat that burned deep inside me, reminding me of the girl who dwelled in the back of my mind all those years ago.

every word about my past, every little detail about my ex, felt like a confession at church – a church where my sins would be revealed to the world. 

talking about my past wouldn’t magically absolve me of my past, now would it? redemption was never an option for me, and i wasn’t asking for it. instead of trying to cleanse myself of my history, i decided to leave it all behind like a forgotten box in an attic. 

𓂃 ོ𓂃 Well, good things don't last, and life moves so fast. I'd never ask who was better 'cause she couldn't be more different from me.

he told you to let it go — to let it die like she did that fateful day. it was no use keeping her memory alive, he said, but if that was the case, why did he take her last name months later? 

not to mention they spent years together — even conceived a child together; a child he named after her, but that detail never seemed to make its way to you. 

everyone told you to stop comparing yourself, but how could you not? she was everything you weren’t even after death: soft spoken, graceful, gentle, patient, loving. 

you didn’t dare ask such a redundant question so you didn’t voice it, but your continuous comparison to her was eating you alive; toji noticed it. you hadn’t slept with him in almost a month, internally afraid he’ll blurt out her name instead of yours.

𓂃 ོ𓂃 And I know that you love me. you don't need to remind me.

he went out of his way to send more ‘i love u’ messages than before; they seemed forced, just like your relationship. 

she had previously informed you of things that found their way to the most profound recesses of your mind. you didn’t flinch at the time, because you were mesmerized that he did such things for her, but it affected you later on. 

you learned bitter truths that made you doubt his love for you. and when you finally realized he didn’t do any of the things she spoke of, it dawned on you; toji didn’t love you. 

not like he loved her. 

𓂃 ོ𓂃 You say no one knows you so well but every time you touch me, I just wonder how she felt.

you’d stay up late at night countless times wondering what toji’s affectionate touch actually felt like. it was something only she ever knew, and you’d do anything to get a semblance of that feeling. 

but it was obvious no one knows the real him — not like she did.

despite everything, you decided to give this relationship one last try by booking a hotel for the both of you. everything inside you screamed that it was a horrible idea, but you did it anyway.

𓂃 ོ𓂃 Valentine's Day, cryin’ in the hotel. I know you didn’t mean to hurt me, so I kept it to myself.

and he finally did it. he mistakenly blurted out her name on the most romantic day of the year. 

“i-i’m sorry.” toji rushed to apologize, grabbing a hold of your arm so you wouldn’t walk out the door.

“I wonder, do you see HER in the back of your mind, in my eyes!?” was the only thing you could force yourself to reply in that moment, breaking away from his grip in the process.  

“i do,” toji dejectedly admits with a hint of sorrow behind his voice. or was it indignity?

he pauses, absentmindedly digging his nails into the tender flesh of his balled up fist as he grapples with his conscience. all along, he knew the day to finally hold himself accountable would come, but he didn’t think it would’ve been like this. 

his mind involuntarily wandered, and in the depths of your gaze, he saw glimpses of his deceased wife — a ghost that lingered in the back of his subconscious even after all this time.  

memories of her flood his mind, and for a brief moment, the both of you merge into one — his past and present colliding into one. the familiar shade of your irises, the identical shine behind them, the bright glimmer of light behind them when you smiled — all of it brought a pang of bittersweet nostalgia to him. 

silence overtook the room like a storm, and with it, your heart. so he does see a reflection of his dead wife when he stares into your eyes — the eyes he promised captivated him to no bounds. 

“was all of it a lie, then?” 

“no.” 

“how was it not a lie, toji?”

“it wasn’t a lie, doll-“ 

“don’t call me that.” you interrupt him with words almost sharp enough to cut him, a slight tremble behind your voice. 

tears immediately welled up in the delicate corners of your eyes, threatening to spill over at any moment. his expression softened at the sight; however, his reluctance to approach you remained. he knew he was the reason behind your hurt, just like he was the cause of hers all that time ago. history does indeed repeat itself, doesn’t it? 

he wished he could find the words that would help ease your pain — the exhaustion and heartache you felt. to take it all away with a mere sentence, that would be quite incredible. but that’s not how life works.

“okay.” he finally whispered, inhaling a deep breath in a mix of defeat and remorse before continuing. “i promise none of it was a lie; i meant every word. i really meant it when i said i adored your eyes…” 

he dry swallows a couple of times, as if doing so would suppress the sorrow lodged in his throat. his eyes darted around the room, as to not meet your own out of the unbearable guilt that simply refused to be consumed. 

the hesitation behind his subtle actions was a telltale that there was a ‘but’ hidden underneath the surface-level flattery. and with an equal amount of incertitude and delay behind your own words, alongside with a hoarse voice, you brace yourself for the moment he finally admits this so-called love of yours was nothing but an illusion.

“but?” 

“…but they’re not her eyes.” 

part 2 here.

[jadeshifting]

i want to shift tonight but i literally haven’t legitimately tried in years. honestly i just want the freaking accomplishment of TRYING at least

if you could give me the most simple mundane steps to even get close to like a relaxation state or feel any symptoms, that would be literally perfect because im a train wreck and i can’t handle complicated instructions

with love,

aves

MY LOVEEE AVES sorry i didn’t get to this until right now, i’m not sure if our time zones are different but i wish i could’ve helped you last night, when you sent this ask i was drunk and eating a gyro on a sidewalk 😔

i completely understand where you’re coming from !! i feel like i have my nighttime routine pretty down, so i’d be happy to give u my lil routine, BUT a couple disclaimers first:

— you don’t need any routine to shift !! sources like early shifttok kept trying to brainrot everyone into thinking they had to do their skincare, clean their room, do their homework, drink a gallon of water, etc etc etc before bed in order to shift. that’s dumb, ignore everyone who said that

— i totally get what you mean when you say you haven’t legitimately tried in years. i fall victim constantly to the “don’t try at all to avoid the disappointment of ‘failure’”, like if i make no attempt at all, then i didn’t fail at anything when i wake up in my CR in the morning

the way i got past this was by “attempting” every night. and i don’t mean laying there and trying to force myself to stay awake while i counted backwards from 100 or anything like that. i mean deep breathing, loosely (BIG emphasis on loosely) visualizing where i’ll be waking up, and telling myself ‘i’m in my DR.’

the first step to the mindset shift is that ‘attempts’ don’t really exist, only whether or not you’ve fully and truly decided you are in your DR

there’s plenty more i could say on this topic, which is farrrr more important than the night routine itself, but i’ll get into what you actually asked for now:

— DRIFT & SHIFT ( a teensy little night routine for the girlies who have a hard time chilling out )

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔

( your night routine won’t determine whether or not you shift, but it certainly helps if you’re relaxed, and that’s what this routine is for )

DAYTIME PREP .　　. 　 ˚　. throughout your day, do robotic affirmations. it’s a great thing to get in the habit of doing in general—murmuring to yourself, humming, or just silently repeating them to yourself in your head. “I am shifting every second.” “I am a master shifter.” “I am aware of my desired reality.” “Shifting is less than effortless.” feed your subconscious the important stuff all day, not just at night

1 .　　. 　 ˚　. PHONE ON SILENT — the moment you decide to start winding down and focusing on relaxation. i mean it. not even vibrate. SILENT.

2 .　　. 　 ˚　. HOT SHOWER — i always feel my most relaxed when i crawl into bed after taking a burning hot shower. the sigh you let out when you’re squeaky clean and wrapping yourself in your comforter means you’ve reached an entirely new plane of relaxation

3 .　　. 　 ˚　. STRETCHING — you don’t even need a yoga mat, you can do it once you’re already laying down. alternatively, you don’t even have to stretch, just systematically go through each of your body parts and make a point to relax them. regardless of which you do, the objective is to release any physical tension from the day. sink into your bed like you’re being pulled down into a cloud

4 .　　. 　 ˚　. SOUNDTRACK — put on something in the background, it truly doesn’t matter what—whatever feels right. it could be positive frequencies, a subliminal for shifting, ambient sound that connects you to your DR (hogwarts common room ambiance, forest or ocean sounds, etc. i’ve found some real gems on youtube before), or just soft music playing. quiet enough so it doesn’t distract you, and you can sink into it

5 .　　. 　 ˚　. SCENTTRACK — my reasoning for spraying various perfumes, lavender blend sleep sprays, or body mists before i go to sleep isn’t just for relaxation, it’s also for distraction. in my experience, if something in my environment is different when i’m laying down to sleep (a different smell than i’m used to, for example) makes it much easier to convince myself that i’m aware of another reality—which is the name of the game, really: believing it

6 .　　. 　 ˚　. DEEP BREATHS — my favorite part, and the most important part. nothing in the whole world will get you more relaxed than laser-focusing in on your breathing—in, out, in, out. you’re already in your DR

let go of the pressure and let yourself float into that in-between state where dreams and reality start to blur

goodnight, shifter. sweet dreams and even sweeter DRs :^)

.　　. 　 ˚　. this guide is for anyone, but this DISCLAIMER IS FOR AVERY MY DEAR SPECIFICALLY — you get in your head about this sort of thing and overthink it. no tip or trick or routine is the “secret” to shifting. your mindset and your affirmations are the key, here. i hope this guide helps you relax for bed before shifting, but what you should be focusing on is tending to your precious subconscious and its tightly held beliefs. you’ve already shifted 🫶

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔

[lesmiix]

hello :3 can you do headcanons of hyunju being protective over reader during the games?

Headcanon: How would Hyun-ju protect you in the games?

...

Summary: Hyun ju wants to protect you at all costs, even if that means to sacrifice her own well being

Warnings: None, just fluff, g/n reader, use of y/n

a/n: Thanks for the request!! I was really hoping someone would ask me something like this lmao

Sorry if there's any gramatical or orthography mistake, English's not my first language 😞🫶

Remember requests for Hyun-ju are open!

It doesn't matter if you met outside of games or in games, you would be her biggest concern, as you guys would get along really quickly when Geum-ja introduced you.

She would really protect you from anything, even the smallest thing.

If you can't sleep at night because you're nervous wondering what the next game is gonna be, she'd offer you to sleep with her.

"Come here, y/n" She said while tapping the bed beside her. You obeyed and you lay down next to her.

"Thanks" You muttered as you clung closer to her, your back pressed against her chest.

"Try to sleep beautiful, good night" She said with a soft voice, while she wrapped her arms around your waist and let a small kiss on the top of your head.

I really think that in the red light, green light game, she'd stand in front of you and she'd keep you really close to her at all times, telling you not to separate from her.

"Hey, y/n, get behind me and stay close to me" She whispered as she slowly pulled you towards her, holding your hand to make sure that no other player would push you and would also run holding your hand so that you wouldn't be left behind.

You definitely would be in her team in the six leg game, she wouldn't trust any other group that wanted you.

She'd make sure that no one put any pressure on you when you couldn't flip the daakji or any other game that you chose. If anyone said anything she'd cover their mouth so you could focus on your thing.

"Come on y/n, is not that fucking hard!" Player 044 yelled at you.

She kept shouting at you how useless you were and you kept getting more and more nervous.

Tears started to fall from your eyes. Suddenly, all the shouting stopped. You saw how Hyun-ju was covering 044's mouth, while giving her a death stare.

"It's y/n, you can do it"

Oh the mingle game...

She wouldn't take her eyes off you.

She definitely would hold your hand tight, she would be terrified of someone taking you with them, as it already happened with player 007

"She's overacting, I can take care of myself" You thought, while you let go her hand before the voice said a number.

"Five" The voice of the megaphone announced. Your little group started running from room to room, just to realize almost every one was occupied. You heard a "Over here!" Coming from Hyun ju, entering an empty room.

Everyone started to run towards her but suddenly you felt someone push you. You fell onto the ground. Before you could even react, you felt some strong arms grab you and almost threw you into the room.

"Don't even think about letting go of my hand again, do you hear me?" She said looking directly into your eyes while grabbing your shoulders.

In lights out she'd probably keep you by her side while you guys are hiding under a random bed, keeping you close to her body.

After what happened in Lights Out, she wouldn't let you go with her to go find the frontman

"Stay here with Geum-ja, it won't be long before I return" She said before letting a small kiss on your forehead.

If anyone said anything bad about you, she would stand between you and the person who's bothering you. Intimidating the person by her height and strong appearance.

"do you need something?" She said as she stepped forward, getting closer to the man in front of you. When he finally left, she looked at you.

"Are you okay?" She said softly while letting a soft caress on your cheek.

a/n: Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!! 🫶🫶🫶

Requests for Hyun-ju are always open!💗

[1920sladydectective]

Best Friend's Mother Ch.3 6.8K

This is part three of the story inspired by @shinyshayminflower

It was gonna be the final part, but it's looking like there's at least another chapter or two to come

Angsty, Sad, just loads of stuff. Tiny bit of Smut MDNI 18+

Link to the whole fic on AO3 here lovelies, or you can scroll down my acc to find it here

Thank you @uselessbard1031 for being the best story sounding board

HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOO

The cold light of day revealed more than you could stomach. 

You hated yourself, hated her, hated everything you had ever stood for and accepted and wanted in that stupid house. 

Mel’s film came back a few days after you’d settled back into your flat, the Kodak Gold showing the pathetic rose tinted glasses that covered you for July and August. It was picturesque, toes in sand and melting Mr Whippys. Smooshed faces and a pissed off Mina. She showed them off, with a happy voice and gesticulating hands. It felt sort of like she was trying to cheer you up. 

You’d been in a ‘funk’ since you got back and it was being chalked up to your immediately heavy workload. 

That was it. Too much reading, four new essays and some new bullshit about work experience. Not the crushing void in your heart, not the breakup that was barely there, that existed for you and you alone. 

Ambessa Medarda was a black hole, alluring in her violence, beautiful in her consumption and you were mere space dust. That she had made abundantly clear. 

It kept you up at night, embarrassment curdled in you like milk. Body in tatters trying to keep your mind in check. 

I’ll ring you when I’m back

Whyever would you need to do that

You fucking idiot. 

Her stupid, soft pyjamas kept her grip on you, your phone’s fancy screen shining like her eyes. She was everywhere and you couldn’t tell anyone. 

You were the living dead, cursed to be unloved and used forever. You never thought of yourself as dramatic before, preferring humour and dismissiveness, but the gaping wound in you cried for attention. Cried to be acknowledged and picked at, a scar in the making, as each little flicker of healing was ripped off again and again. 

Six weeks later you still felt like a lovesick puppy. University and your job made time sparse and relaxation sparser still, but somehow the sadness lingered. You’d been grieving it for nearly as long as it had happened, some weird crossroads where it felt inappropriate to be sad. It was a summer fling, how many had existed since the dawn of time and yet it dug into you like an elusive splinter. 

Mel was another issue entirely. Warm and tender, trying to prop you up when you stopped eating or didn’t keep up with the laundry. Part of you wanted to scream and cry. I’m not who you think I am, your mind shouted, I’m awful and you should hate me like I hate myself. 

Then you’d eat a sausage roll, she’d send you a shitpost and you’d cry in the shower. Selfish as it was, you couldn’t lose both Medardas. 

Sometimes you thought you saw her name pop up on your phone, you’d look each time like a baby falling for a game of peekaboo. Nothing. The last message made your lungs tense every single time. 

 Bacon Crunchy or No?

Crunchy, but still soft. 

Demanding x

That breakfast in bed was the most revisited memory, probably spurred on by how many times you’d read those texts. You wouldn’t eat bacon anymore, flicked it out of your meal deal BLT before realising how counterproductive you’d made your sandwich. Wet mayonnaise and lettuce with half a tomato slice. What a sad life. Your cheeks were damp again and it was hard to breathe.

At some point enough was enough. You were a twenty three year old mooning over a woman over twenty five years your senior. You had a life, you had friends and a dad who called you sometimes. She was not the sun, you did not revolve around her. 

That lasted for about a week, until Mel mentioned going back briefly for her Mum’s birthday. November 9th. You hadn’t known that, wished you still didn’t. Somehow you were in a shopping centre helping her search for a gift. Budget was extensive and so was Mel’s ability to shop. 

What would be a good gift for Ambessa? Rat poison perhaps? 

You saw it or maybe it saw you. Gold, each chain link tiny, making it look almost like falling sunlight. One large crimson ruby hung at the end, metal criss crossing over it in a pretty setting. It would fit almost every outfit she wore. It matched her favourite earrings. It was unique, like her and she didn’t deserve it. 

“That seems perfect,” Your voice croaked, pointing towards the glass cabinet. 

Mel agreed because well, it just was. You lived, slowly and painfully, Rowan Atkinson’s scene from Love Actually. This was your punishment, your karma for your indecisiveness and deceit. Leaving Selfridges (dissociated and bankrupt from a bagel) you allowed yourself to be talked at. That seemed to be happening a lot these days, more sounding board and less person. That seemed to be what you’d lost, your personness, stuck in silk sheets in Surrey. There was no recon mission to be had either, the invitation for birthday celebrations blissfully, brutally not extended to you. 

You heard all about it though, obviously. You weren’t that lucky. Mel and Kino had organised a party, she had pretended to be ever so surprised and you had received fourteen drunk videos at three am. The house was different to how you’d ever seen it, twinkling lights and darker furnishings to herald the stormy winter approaching. Kino was doing the CanCan, offscreen choked laughter making your heart hurt. Each video devolved to make less sense, snapshots of the living room, pretty decoration and discarded champagne. The last one made your world spin, bile eating your throat. 

It was Ambessa, glassy eyed with shimmering makeup and bouncy curls, grinning at the camera with a cupcake in hand. Sitting pretty, as perfect as you’d imagined, was the necklace. 

“How’s your party been, Mum?” Mel’s hiccupped voice. 

“Perfect, Darling,” Ambessa muttered, an easy smile growing. 

“And your gift?” 

“Also perfect, Little wolf,” Her fingers stroked it instinctively, feeling along the ruby. 

“Say thank you to the camera then,” Mel says, impatient and swaying slightly, “She’s the one who helped me find it,” 

The shift was slight, you only noticed because you were looking, her face draining of some joy. 

Tone coy and light she stared directly at the screen, “Ah I see, when you said one of your friends, I didn’t realise you meant her! Who knew she knew me so well?” a criminally long pause, “Thank you, Sweet Girl,” 

The footage stopped, her smirk immortalised.

You hated her. Vile, vindictive little bitch. You burned all but one of your pyjamas sets in the garden, mesmerised by the flames as if their heat could cleanse you. Charred linen smelt like shit and you dumped it in the bin before it became a problem for the neighbours. Lip chewed raw, you curled onto the dining chair you had occupied half an hour ago, looking down at your traitorous phone

Your text response was calmer after that.

                                                            Nice, cute party! Drink some water babe xox

I kissed Jayce

                                                           Oh? 

And Viktor

                                                            OH

Can you call? 

                                                             It’s 4am Mel. 

                                                            Yes

The shrill thrum of Facetime rang throughout your kitchen, ear twitching slightly as you answered. 

“Thank fuck,” Mel sounded both stressed and excited, “This party has been so weird I wish you were here,” 

You didn’t. “Weird cause you tongued your two closest friends? Or weird some other way?”

“Don’t say tongued it’s vile,” She was clearly stumbling down the corridor to her bedroom, “And both, I guess? It’s a long story” 

“Babble away then, babe,” You’d missed this, missed her.

It actually wasn’t that long at all, content wise, Mel was just so drunk she restarted five thousand times. Jayce and Viktor were together, this you knew. Mel would sometimes kiss them both, occasionally more, and she didn’t know what to feel; this was new. Having a conversation about emotional intimacy versus physical with her when she was drunk and your last fuck had been her mother was like a stupid game of Monoply. It took forever, not much was accomplished and she ended up falling asleep just as you were getting to the good bit. 

“Mum’s also been weird,” It was slurred, hair spraying on the pillow, “Nostalgic or something,” 

“Nostalgic?” You didn’t want to talk about her, you didn’t.

“I dunno, think she missed me and Kino,” She coughed, “She’s been more quiet,” 

Quiet. Of course. She didn’t seem quiet when she threw your pet name in your face, but hey what did you know? Follow up questions were useless, Mel’s snores crackling through the phone. 

“Are you sleeping, Little wolf?” 

You were going to throw up, twitching hands launching your phone across the table. Mel’s phone echoed the crashing, drawing Ambessa’s attention. Picking the phone from her daughter’s fingers, she raised a quizzical and then uncertain brow. 

“Night Mel,” You whispered, slamming the end call button. The last noise from her end was that voice calling out your name. 

You didn’t sleep, your only remaining pair of pyjamas mocking you from the laundry basket. 

It washed over you like the tides, again and again, each time inching closer to consuming you. So much energy had been expended to move past this, but you crumbled like a stale biscuit in the face of her teasing, of your name from her mouth. Even now your heart skipped, ached, sang. It wasn’t real, the adoration and attraction she had looked at you with. How could you grapple with that? Alone and surrounded by all the kindness she had gifted you. There was a doubt, tart and strong, in your mind that you would ever matter to anyone ever again. Your clanking alarm clock seemed to agree, burrowing into your fitful dreams and warping to the sound of her laugh.

Mel came back, hungover and a little emotionally unstable which seemed to happen every time she went home. You had tacos on the sofa, sharing a beer and having the same conversation as before, though sober this time. You steered clear of her, focusing on Mel with an intensity that made the girl snort. 

“Back to planet earth then?”

“What?” Lettuce tumbled out, they’d given you a hard shell by accident. 

“I mean this is probably the most you’ve spoken to me since the summer,” 

A flinch, body rejecting the truth, as your lips turned down. 

“I get it, work and stuff,” Mel quickly added, stroking your arm like she would Mina, “Just missed you,” 

“Missed you too,” It choked out, despite your efforts to stay calm, flinging yourself against her and squeezing. 

Fuck Ambessa. It settled in you, a certainty fuelled by the intense turmoil of the past twenty four hours. You loved Mel and you would not be a shit friend anymore. 

Days were lighter after that, your acceptance shifting the colours of your world slightly. Your fancy laptop was a blessing, not a collar, helping you write your thesis without trouble. The coffee shop could have been worse, it was in a beautiful building with a rich history and it meant you could eat branded beans instead of 26p sludge. You’d even managed to save some money for Christmas. You were rising from the ashes of unrequited love, becoming a true optimist. Maybe you might start liking yourself soon. 

Then your dad called. 

“Hey, Peanut,” His gravelly tone was easily decipherable. He was about to disappoint you, again. 

“Hi Dad,” You settled in the armchair, chest deflating, “Everything okay?”

“I’ve got some news,” a rattled sigh, “I’m gonna need to stay on till January,” 

Rough hands ran over your face, “Of course,”

“I’m sorry kid but with the mortgage and-”

“I know, I understand,” 

“Maybe you could go back to that friend’s house?” He said hopefully, “You had such a good time,” 

Not fucking likely. If you told Mel that’s exactly what she’d suggest, so this one was staying quiet, you weren’t that healed. “It’s alright, I think I’d like to be at home, see some familiar faces, could always have dinner with the cousins,” 

“Yeah,” He sniffed, “Yeah okay love,” 

“I love you, I guess I’ll see you in the new year?”

“Of course, and I’ll ring you in the holidays,” He was firm in his intentions, even if it wouldn’t stick, “Love you,”

Christmas alone. Lucky you. 

It took more effort than you’d anticipated to censor the news around Mel. Part of you, small and desperate, wanted to fall into her and cry about it but then you would end up sniffling, sitting in her car on the way to that damned house. The last few weeks of term flew by, deadlines and Christmas parties numbing you out, pushing you into a glitzy, overwhelmed state. Mel was in her element, glittering gold as she wrapped a mountain of gifts, covered all of your kitchen surfaces in icing sugar and screamed George Michael. She was supposed to leave before you, giving you three days of peace in the house before you ended up in rural Derbyshire with nobody but the deer to talk to. 

About an hour before Mel was due to leave you received a phone call from your father and it affirmed for you that the universe, in all its cosmic wonders, had it out for you. 

Your terraced house had a very complex and old heating system, which had apparently died a sudden and dramatic death. Sure, whatever, no problem. Except a new one was going to cost at least ten thousand pounds and couldn’t be installed until January anyway. The neighbours had told him about the sudden flooding, and he had tried to deal with it faster, but being so far away and with so little immediate funds. 

“So it’s fucked,” You groan, “I guess I’ll have to stay here then,”

“I-” Your dad sounded shattered, “We might have to looking at selling, I haven’t got the cash to fix it,” 

“I’ll figure that out Dad,” Tight throat, air raspy, “It’s okay, thanks for calling,” 

“What’s fucked?” Mel said, appearing like a ghost, your shoulders jolting. 

“Eavesdropper,” It was a grumble, “It’s nothing,” 

“It’s clearly not if you’re looking at staying here,” 

Your eyes rolled, frustration bubbling,“House’s heating broke, can’t be fixed till January so I’ll stay here,” 

Mel looked crestfallen, “Oh no,” She embraced you, the hug more loving than you deserved, “What’s your dad going to do? Come up here? He can have my room obviously,” 

“Why would he need that?” You snorted, “He’s staying on the rig for Christmas-” Uh. Oops. 

Brown eyes flared with anger, “What? You didn’t tell me that!”

“I-I” You were at a loss, desperate to avoid what was obviously hurtling your way, “I didn’t wanna be a downer on all the cool plans, I was just gonna relax alone or whatever,” Lame excuse, loser. 

“You’re coming to ours,” Mel said, decided, waving away all of your protests like one would swat a fly. Somehow she was already calling her mother, telling her to expect another guest for Christmas. The stress of heating was the final straw on a decrepit, twitching camel. 

Had you died? Were you in Hell? 

That’s what the Land Rover felt like, speeding through endless countryside as she sang Christmas Wrapping for the ninth time. You felt almost outside your body, about to reunite with a part of yourself you’d allowed to die. Mel had chewed you out for the first hour of the journey about being an idiot, about upsetting her by not just asking to stay. I know it was awesome in the summer, she had whined, you’re not like a burden or anything. 

Rolling up the driveway felt like that moment on a rollercoaster just before the adrenaline floods you. Your stomach turns, you feel the wind and feel how high up you are, seeking an out you know isn’t there. Then the ride drops, hurtles down the track and you’re too overwhelmed to think much of anything at all. Ambessa standing, cashmere jumper and longer curls, against the door waiting to greet you both was your drop. Blank, hot nothingness. 

“Darlings,” She cried, lips as crimson as ever. 

She stepped forward, throwing her arms around both of you and you thought you might die. You hated her. Her smirk showed she could tell, though it wasn’t as firmly fixed as usual. Sunrays, squinting eyes and that smirk as she ate a slice of watermelon. Shut Up.

A small dinner was already ready, a weathered looking Kino dishing up portions. His greeting was warm but distracted. 

“Mum’s had me hauling all the trees into place,” He grumbled, passing you a bowl of stew, “because of course it couldn’t wait until the precious princesses arrived to help,”

Gods you’d missed him. “You think I’m a princess Kino? I’m touched,” 

Mel forced you into your chair, snorting at her brother, “Would you believe this idiot was going to stay at uni all by herself?”

You didn’t feel like an idiot, you felt like a prey animal fleeing one predator to sprint into the den of another. 

Ambessa interjected then, “Yes, what’s this I hear about broken heating?” 

It was an innocent and very valid question from the woman hosting you. She needed to shut the fuck up. “Uh, our terraced house was still using its system from the 60s and it finally died,” You said, instead of telling her the former, “Dad’s on the rig and can’t get anyone to fix it sooner than January,” 

“We’ll have you for the whole festive period then,” Ambessa said, tone calm as she sent you a smile. It was indifferent and kind, in the same way she had been those first days of the summer. It rocked you, eating some of the adrenaline and replacing it with tears that glazed embarrassingly for a second. Long enough for her to see, but with enough control to spare you from Mel. 

 Five weeks of being in Medarda Central, playing happy families, “If that’s okay,”. 

“We’re so happy to have you, Dear,” 

Bitch. “Thank you, Ambessa,” 

That evening was like a dream, stuck behind the screens of a nightmare. Three large christmas trees to decorate, a tradition apparently, with mulled wine and gingerbread. Everything was beautiful, and to your surprise each ‘child’ was given a tree. The larger one in the foyer was put up on November 21st every year by Ambessa, Mel told you, but the Medarda siblings and Mina each got their own tree to decorate once everyone was home. 

You had been given Mina’s with a snort from Ambessa, who was supposedly happy to have someone else take on the ‘lazy demon’s workload’. It felt nice, for a moment, as you stared down at the fluff ball who seemed to have accepted you as a guest. This was a new thing and if you closed your eyes and breathed out of your armpit no memories appeared. You decorated methodically, using some of Mina’s and some spare that had been assembled for you. A perfect evening, with your best friend and her stupid big brother. And their sexy, evil, confusing mother. 

Like you thought, a dream to nightmare pipeline. A trend you saw continuing for the rest of the holiday. It ended with watching The Grinch, something you had never seen. Jim Carrey was unusual and Martha May was disturbingly attractive, but that’s all you really gained, too busy ignoring Ambessa’s joking gaze. Did she think you were crazy? That you wanted to spend this holiday being fucked about by her too? Mel’s head on your shoulder grounded you, saved you from the turbulence of her.

It caught you once, entirely by accident, and your head began to swim. Golden swirls, tender and amused. She looked more beautiful somehow, finally victorious in getting your attention as she raised a brow. Your neck mottled red as anxious teeth crushed against one another. Rough hands stroking your cheek, kissing your sleepy eyelids as you ignored the film that followed Trading Places. This place was haunted and you realised that you were just another ghost. Kino went to bed first and unlike a few months ago, you were determined not to be a straggler. You got your water and tea whilst Mel spoke to her Mum about the upcoming Carol Concert you were supposed to be attending. 

“Night,” You said, voice soft, as she nodded to them. 

“Oh,” Mel said, “Bit early for you, isn’t it?”

“Long day,” A smile, “See you in the morning,” 

“Nice to have you back, well done with the Tree today,” Ambessa’s silky tone drifted, “Sleep well Sweetheart,” 

That was a new one and it caused no reaction at all. Your hand was trembling because the tea was hot, that was all. Your body shook from the exhaustion in the spare room, lip wet and trembling, because the journey was long and you missed your Dad. You could not feel her phantom touches brushing the tears away, it was simply the wind.

Ten days of Christmas festivities passed and it did not get any easier. No matter when you woke, she still somehow had your tea ready for you. You’d hoped initially that it was Rictus, the man you had come to know slightly better than in the warmer months, but alas he hadn’t a clue what you were on about. Those eyes, hypnotic and cruel, still attempted to lure you in each day. Hands lingered, bodies closer than needed as you passed in corridors or sat on the same sofa. 

One day you boiled over, alone in the kitchen with her as she sorted through recipes. 

“Will you knock it off?” 

“Hmm?”

“Don’t hum at me,” You snapped, hands clenching your mug, horror clenching your heart, “T-The touching and the looks, stop it,” 

Ambessa laughed, pushing her glasses onto her head as she fixed you with a look, “Didn’t seem to mind it a couple of months ago, Sweet Girl,” 

“A couple of months ago I was a fool,” A stuttered breath, half stuck and bubbling, “Mel’s my priority, I love her and this fucked up thing would hurt her, so stop it,” 

Ambessa’s look changed into something you couldn’t understand, eyes pensive and face blank. She nodded once, head tilted to scan you. Was it respect? Surely not, she barely saw you as a full person. 

“Okay,” Her tone was measured, “I can work with that,” 

It relieved you, the thick, invisible smog circling overhead finally beginning to clear. You didn't trust her intentions towards you, but you could trust them towards Mel. The tremors and the cries slowed slightly, your sleep troubled but not totally absent. 

Something new formed, something you could just about stomach. It was just as if she was your best friend’s mum, hosting you for the holidays, with jokes and motherly pats. She had never known the taste of your lips, you had never nestled your head between her thighs, never shared an overly fond look over her daughter’s head. It was easier this way, you promised yourself in the dead of night as you tossed from side to side. You’d spent so little time actually in this bed, that now it seemed as foreign to you as the woman who occupied the other. Her eyes still stayed on you from time to time, but it was insignificant now. 

Did you prefer that? Was this better? 

All Ambessa knew was that she did not like this change. Not one bit. She was unsure of how to process you coming back. You were a nice enough girl, an excellent fuck and actually funny to be around. You made Mel happy, which made her happy, but you had gotten a little too attached. She had avoided you since then for that reason, the thoughts of you that drifted through easy to push away. That being said, she missed you sprawled in her bed babbling nonsense as she ruined you. You were a pest, lingering around her thoughts and she was unsure of how to proceed. She seemed to regain one part of you, sarcastic and passionate, at the expense of any and all private access to you. It irked her, though she would not admit it, that you had called it before she had. Guilt sat heavy in her stomach, mixing with something else as she remembered your aggressive devotion to her daughter. Parts of you, buried, now resurfaced for her. How you took your tea, which hand would brush back hair behind your ear, in which order you would put your socks and shoes on. Tiny, minute details. She glanced at you, licking up cream on a hot chocolate and saw images of a similar kind, your pretty crinkled eyes eating an ice cream as you gazed at her across the sunlounger. 

Ambessa Medarda could not wait for you to get the hell out of her house. 

How ironic, considering you finally felt you were flowing into the new rhythm. 

She wasn’t scary, she had no power. Other than the fact that this was, you know, her house. You shared tea, read together, joked and laughed. You only looked at her lips every now and again, a natural thing. You looked at Mel’s lips sometimes. Yeah. Her nicknames only caused nausea, not an actual gag to choke you. Plus you were distracted half the time by Kino and Mel. Frockiling about in London, seeing a show or wandering through museums, it was endless. Somehow you had done more in the first two weeks here than most of the summer, mind frazzled by Christmas joy. The best part was that on December 17th it started to snow and showed no signs of stopping. A true winter wonderland. 

The only other distinct change from the summer was the shiny new vibrator in your bedside drawer. You still had needs, for god sake and the distraction should help. Nothing would satiate the burn like she did, but you tried not to think about that once you realised it was her you pictured to send yourself over the edge. Oops. 

Ambessa, restless and frustrated, strolled down the corridor in the dead of night. Each door zipped past until a grunt startled her into stillness. It was from behind your door and a flare of worry resounded in her at the pained sound. Against her better judgement, her fist rose to knock on the wood when she heard it again. Clearer now, louder. Not pain, her mind roared, it was a cry of pleasure. Pleased little pants and gasps travelled to her ears, turning her thoughts to molten nothingness. She had uncharacteristically avoided sex for the past few weeks, and this was enough for her to tumble over the edge. Leaning against the wall, breath silent, she gulped. This was ridiculous, wrong and crazy and reckless. She was in the hallway for christ’s sake. Still, with chaotic urgency, her hand slipped beneath her trousers as she caressed her neglected clit. 

You lay, legs wide and twitching, pleasuring yourself in bed totally unaware of your desperate audience. Tonight had been tougher on your resilience, her dress was so simple and yet it hugged her in a way that made you think of flowing water. Water led you to thinking of the pool and suddenly you were smacked with images of her naked swimming. It was too good to ignore, already halfway down the hot spiral your body craved, teeth bruising plump lips. Head thrown back, you began to keen and mewl, the toy pushing you into mindlessness, each gentle buzz pulling a whine. 

Ambessa was almost nonsensical, unable to battle for her ironclad control as your noises had her frantically chasing release. You had haunted her for days, flushed cheeks and snide comments, as if nothing had ever happened. You essentially ignored any heat from her and it was maddening. She wanted to fuck you into the mattress you lay on now, the image making her eyes roll slightly. The final straw, shooting her into a shaking climax, was a sudden, bursting whimper of her name from your lips. 

You hadn’t meant to, rocking yourself against this thick rabbit, but the image of her was so clear and you wanted it so bad, craved it. You cried out for her, as you had so many times before. Everything sang, bright and harsh, as you went limp. 

She was much the same, choking her gasps back as her knees shook slightly. Finally some relief, her thoughts able to order themselves slightly. She did not, however, like the form they took. You, temptress and forbidden fruit, carved a home in her head she could not fill with anything else. 

This was a mess. She was a mess. You were a problem. 

Ambessa found herself bundling up, rambling at Rictus about almost everything as she prepared to check the lake, to see if it was ready for skating. He took it well, he was trusted for a reason. There was a merry glint in those eyes, a knowing of his Mistress. Something was wrong, was grating on her and he believed that something had a name and sparkly, open eyes. 

“Need anything else?” Rictus asked, passing her the mug of coffee so she could finish it, “I’ll sort out whatever part of your wardrobe Mina has mutilated and then start wrapping the kids gifts,” 

“Fantastic,” Distracted, dismissive, till her shoulders tensed, “Did you get anything for her?” 

He remained neutral, “Did you want me to?” 

A pregnant pause, stormy eyes, “I-Uh yes, I’ll send you a list,” 

As if her house had become a prison, she smacked into you just as she wandered outside. You stood, fluffy coat and thick scarf, staring mystified at the white landscape.

“I’m sorry,” It was a squeak, mind haunted by your enjoyment last night. 

“No, no,” She said, “That was my fault,” 

“What,” A swallow, as you met her eyes with passiveness, “Where are you off to?”

“The lake,” She grunted, “See if it’s ready,” 

“Ready?” 

“For skating,” 

Your mind exploded with excitement, never having even considered this as a possibility, lips betraying you, “Oh my god really, can I come?”

Your childlike wonder clawed at her lungs, posture softening, smile tugged forward unbidden, “If you’re careful, and do as I say,” 

That was how you’d ended up watching Ambessa Medarda check this huge lake with military precision. You hadn’t visited it much in the summer, it was a fifteen minute walk through the woods so in the heat the pool was the obvious preference. Now though? It was a magical, entrancing grove that you giddy with joy. It was almost like it didn’t matter that it was her, that this was the longest you’d spent alone since August. 

“Well,” Ambessa called, “Looks perfect to me,” 

To your surprise, she removed two pairs of skates from her bag and chucked one at you, leaning against a large Yew tree to put her own on. 

You didn’t know she knew to bring a second pair and it flared suspicion in you, “Why do you have these?” 

“They’re Mel’s, Sweetheart,” She answered, amusement tickling her cheeks, “Didn’t realise they were still in there, you’re the same shoe size,” 

Oh. Okay. That still didn’t solve the issue that you had no idea how to skate, and you said as much. 

Ambessa could feel, as intimately as the danger of an oncoming bullet, that this would not end well. The offer left her lips all the same. She could teach you, it was Christmas tradition and Mel would end up dragging you here the second she found out it was ready. 

She was a good teacher, patient and calm, with a habit of everexcessive praise and degradation intermingling. You were being a twat when gaining momentum, but did turning very well Darling. It felt unreal, distant from the dull ache she had placed in your heart, as acceptance slotted further into your bones. 

Soaring like an injured bird, she watched you. Round and round you moved, grace slow to arrive but firm in staying, as her eyes stung. She couldn’t understand why, breath quick, as she coughed into gloved hands. The pressure built the more you moved and Ambessa nibbled her lip in contemplation. 

“Oh my god, it’s ready,” Kino’s loud shriek saved his mother from further emotional introspection, “MEL. MEL. Come Skate,” 

The Medarda siblings joined you, both skilled and dangerously competitive, forcing Ambessa to tug you left and right across the ice to avoid their thundering. 

In short, it was the best day yet and that night you could sleep without a cry or an orgasm to force you. Christmas might actually be salvageable. 

Another party. You’d joked to Mel that she really was the perfect upper class stereotype with a pool and horses you had avoided out of immense fear, with all her time spent getting drunk and talking about all the things she’d done. Mel was a bit offended, which made your assessment all the funnier, gold lips pouting. This one was very intimate, you’d know everyone there and it was more just a chance to see everyone before Christmas Day.It was just the Medardas and you on the big day, their first year having another person due to Ambessa’s usual strictness that it was only family. That was like a lobster slap to the face, making you feel special and like a burden all at once. 

Somehow you were crucial in planning yet again, Mel too busy seeing old friends before they went away and Kino refusing to engage. He’d done his bit for the year with Ambessa’s birthday, he stubbornly replied, hiding himself away in the library with Mina. 

That was how you found yourself in the kitchen, at the breakfast table expending half your energy to a Chess Game with Rictus and the other to being a food tester. 

“Don’t like cranberry sauce,” You grimaced at her offering, Rook takes Knight “That one’s for him,” 

“I don’t either,” Bishop takes Rook, his gruff smile making you laugh in kind. 

“What’s the point of you then?” Ambessa snapped, eating the canape herself. 

“Idle decoration?” “Part of the furniture?” You responded the same time as Rictus, giggles hidden by an insincere hand.

The three of you powered through the Everest of washing up she had created, humming to the radio and thinking up the worst Christmas cracker jokes we’d heard over the years. You were on drying duty initially, till it proved you hadn’t got a clue where anything lived. 

“Didn’t you live here for three months?” He mocked, reordering the baking trays. 

“She didn’t cook once in that time,” Ambessa sighed, “Some people just take and take and take,” 

It was a joke, but it made you angry and the plate hit the water with more force than you could control. Soapy, lukewarm water crashed against both you and Ambessa, leaving you incredulous and her as still as a statue. 

“Well,” Rictus said, warm presence cutting through the tension, “Off you both go to change, it’s enough for me to finish alone anyway,” 

You both rushed down the corridor, and you felt yourself lurch as something reminiscent of the echo of an apology left her lips. You waved it away, eyes stinging as you slammed the door and curled under the duvet. 

Everything was fine. Everything was good. You were friends now and you didn’t love her at all and you weren’t fuelled most by her laugh, her approval, her existence. You fell asleep with a wet stomach, melancholic music echoing in your head as you ended up back on that dreamlike lake. 

The day arrived, December 22nd and you felt weird nauseous butterflies. Things had backtracked a bit since the washing up, but you were determined to drag yourself forward. 

Everything shone, the powerhouse of a small country fuelling the lights and decorations as Mel sat crisscrossed on her bed, painting you like one of her canvases. 

“This feels like a lot,” You said, yawning, “Everyone coming already knows what I look like,” 

She smacked your arm lightly, “It’s Christmas, live a little,” 

“I’m already living a lot thank you, you’ve got me in heels and spanx,” You flicked the snap to emphasise your point, moving your lips to hinder her lipstick application. 

“Brat,” She gripped your chin, keeping you steady as her face lit up, “There you look like an angel now,” 

You did, Your hair was shiny and curled, your face a painted marvel of Mel’s imagination and one of her white and gold dresses clung to you, highlighting everything you had ever been blessed with. Your eyes burned. A click smashed through your thoughts, the film camera flash capturing you forever, awestruck at yourself and grateful for your best friend. 

Joy came easy here, her presence diluted by people you had come to love, as you slipped through the small crowd, challenging Viktor to a sober chess rematch. You didn’t win, but neither did he, and with a stalemate reached you gobbled up Ambessa’s admittedly perfect food parcels. Rictus seemed to circle back to you more often than anyone else, smirk on his face, a silent comradery. 

The record player was soothing, champagne and eggnog mixing to make an odd sensation in your stomach as Kino twirled you around. 

“I’m glad Mel has you,” He mutters against your ear, “She’s needed a friend to ground her,”

Everything spun weirdly, the compliment ironic as you nodded roughly, “I love her, she’s the best, and hey, you’re not too bad either,”

He laughed, twirling you a final time, “Always the charmer, Princess,” 

Chaos devolved, as it always did with this group of friends, the snow too tempting a siren. You’d actually been having a coherent conversation with Ambessa and Cassandra Kiramman about your thesis progress, eyes only slightly hazy with booze, when you were hauled away by Jayce and VI. A snowball fight on the patio had erupted, bodies numb to the cold as their skin was heated by alcohol, violent throws and crashing dodges. No true adult participated, though some watched fondly, as Rictus recorded the whole thing on an old camcorder, another Medarda tradition apparently. 

Ambessa trailed the scene, heart warm at the sight. She loved her children, loved the people they had become even if sometimes they seemed alien to her, more gentle and considerate than she considered possible. Their friends were a great reflection of them, loud and eclectic, with the loyalty of a wolf pack. You flitted about like a golden mote of light, drawing her eye more than she wished. That dress was sinful, you filled it in a way that made her ache, makeup turning your eyes into deep pools in wish she lost her senses. She knew nothing about your thesis, though Cassandra seemed to have continued that conversation with her as you were dragged away. This was becoming impractical, her body not her own. She retreated to the kitchen under the pretense of refills. 

You bowed out early, freezing your tits off was fun until it wasn’t and you were less agile than the others. Beelinging for the kitchen, desperate for tea and to choke down more canapes, your cold skin smashed against a warm, firm wall. 

She was beautiful tonight, as always. Resplendent and controlling, wielding her space perfectly. Braids and curls intermingled to frame her angular face, statement birthday necklace in place with matching earrings, as long lashes fluttered. It was the most stuck you’d felt since coming back to the house, an aura so similar to that first barbeque, that you’d almost slipped and made an inappropriate joke. 

Your damp, snow soaked curls stuck your face as you stood inches from her, the kitchen silent save for your mingled breath. 

“Good party,” You crooked, frozen in face. 

“Yes,” She responded in kind, “A success I think,” 

“I-I just wanted another salmon tart thing,” 

She placed one in your hand, eyes widening, as she gripped your bare shoulder “You’re freezing,  Sweet girl,” 

Sweet Girl the tipsy, happy haze called. You nodded, “Was in the snow,”

She could warm you up, her sly and corrupted mind cried, thoughts blank as your innocent, devil eyes captured her body and perhaps even soul. She moved thoughtlessly, a gentle ringed hand tilting your chin as her dark lips crushed against yours. 

Euphoria. You were in heaven, succumbing hungrily to the kiss, lungs starved of oxygen for four months. No logic here, no reason or doubt. Only her firm guiding embrace, and warm tongue. Ambessa Medarda was an evil, perfect woman and you could not escape her. 

Dizzy, drunk in more ways than one, you pushed her off gently. It took everything in you, salmon tart crushed to nothing on the ground as you gulped. 

Her inability to treat you a person was not why you’d stopped this, though if you respected yourself it should have been, it was because of Mel. 

“This isnt-” 

“Oh my fucking god,” It was shrill, whispered and bitter, your heart dropping out of your ass, ”No, you haven’t done this to me Mum, not again,”

Speak of the devil.

[xomakara]

All About You

SUMMARY | You and your five boyfriends go on a trip. PAIRING | NCT ‘00 Line/Reader GENRE | smut with no plot, unprotected sex (wrap it up everyone!), oral sex, anal sex, vaginal sex, gangbang, multiple penetration, sex in general, filthy sex RATING | Mature LENGTH | 6K words AUTHOR’S NOTE | Oh lord…please excuse me as I go dunk myself in holy water.

NCT Main Masterlist 

"Baby, are you close?" Haechan whispered in your ear as he stroked your cheek.

"Fuck, Haechan...I'm so close." You could barely get the words out through your panting breath.

"Fuck, she's clenching down on me!" Jeno groaned, his breathing matching yours, "She must be very close, because it feels like she's squeezing the life out of my dick."

Haechan let out a chuckle and stroked your hair back gently, watching as you bounced on Jeno's cock, taking him all the way inside of you, causing you to tremble with pleasure at how good you felt wrapped around his thick shaft. He moved his hand up from your hip to the small of your back and squeezed gently. "It looks like your body is craving more."

"Mmm..." You moaned and then quickly corrected yourself, "Not that I don't love what we're doing now, but I need to feel something more inside of me too."

Jeno started thrusting faster now and Haechan stopped rubbing your ass to move his other hand to the front of your body, resting it on your clit. He lightly pinched it as he continued moving your hips up and down on Jeno's cock. "That's right, baby. Fuck your little pussy harder for us."

You bit your lip as you rode Jeno's cock faster. Your legs were starting to shake now, which only intensified your need for release. "Oh god, Haechan, I'm gonna come so hard..."

"Did she come yet?" You heard Jaemin asking Haechan as they watched you ride Jeno's dick. There was no mistaking the lust in his voice. You could tell by the tone of his voice that he was getting off on this just as much as you were.

"Kitten," Renjun whispered in your ear. "Does Jeno's cock feel good? Tell us how it feels."

"So good...so fucking good..." You whimpered, feeling Jeno's cock throbbing inside of you.

"Our little dumpling must be close." Yangyang muttered from his spot in the corner, watching you riding Jeno's cock with nothing but a towel covering him. "And that tight pussy of hers is milking his cock for everything it's worth."

"Baby, you look so damn hot right now." Haechan whispered in your ear as he trailed kisses along your neck, letting them linger near your collarbone. You closed your eyes and pressed your face against Haechan's chest.

"Oh my god, I'm coming..."

Your body shook from the waves of pleasure washing over you and you cried out as Jeno began filling your insides with his warm seed. You clenched down on him, trying to milk every last drop of cum from his balls, but the man simply refused to let go. He kept grinding into you, his dick still hard, even after he had finished shooting his load deep inside of you. As he held himself inside of you, your body shuddered uncontrollably, your face buried in Haechan's chest as you trembled and cried from the blissful aftershocks of orgasmic bliss coursing through your body. It took you several minutes before you could regain control of your body enough to slide off of Jeno and collapse on the bed beside him.

Jaemin came to your side in an instant, kissing you deeply as you reached out to grasp his naked chest. "How does our little Y/N feel? Do you want more?"

Ever since you and your five boyfriends moved in together, your sex life has become a daily ritual of steamy threesomes, late night drunken sessions and even spontaneous gang bangs. You can never get enough of each other and it's all thanks to you being open minded and not putting labels on anything that goes on between you.

To the outside world, you and Haechan were just a couple that loved each other deeply and unconditionally, but that was just one side of the story. They knew about Renjun, Jeno, Jaemin and Yangyang but most people assumed that you were all just friends. And while they may have thought that the six of you had settled into an unbreakable bond, they couldn't possibly know what really went on behind closed doors.

You laid in bed, trying to compose yourself as you listened to your boyfriends talking about how well the night went. Jaemin was whispering sweet words in your ear, praising how much of a good girl you'd been, saying that you made sure to make everyone feel good, how you deserved to have such good men worship you. The others were making similar comments about how they had all enjoyed themselves, but Jeno sounded especially proud.

You smiled softly to yourself and glanced over to see Haechan smiling at you with pure adoration. He was your whole world. No matter how many times you came, or how many orgasms you gave out, you would always return to him, unable to find anyone else who could match the passion you shared with him. Even though he was your first real boyfriend, he would always hold a special place in your heart because he taught you how to love, and trust.

As your thoughts drifted to Haechan's strong arms wrapped around you and his firm lips caressing your skin, you remembered another reason why you loved Haechan so much: Because he had introduced you to the other four men who would change your life forever. You had five men who loved you as their own and wanted to share you with each other, without any rules or limits. And the best part was, no matter what happened, you would always have Haechan there to take care of you, loving you with all of his heart.

"Baby, you okay? Are you feeling sore?" Haechan kissed your forehead tenderly as he replaced Jeno's spot on the bed.

"No, I'm fine...just thinking about tonight makes me tired." You said and buried your head in his chest.

"Ahhh...that's understandable. It takes a lot of energy for us to fuck that tight little pussy of yours over and over again." Jeno laughed as he caressed your thigh. "But don't worry; we'll let you rest tomorrow. We'll go ahead and get cleaned up for now."

You snuggled closer to Haechan, smiling to yourself as you felt Renjun and Yangyang clean your body with washclothes and soap, gently wiping away every last trace of sweat and semen from your flushed skin. As you drifted off to sleep, safe in the knowledge that these five men would protect you and make sure that you always had what you needed, you couldn't help but smile.

"I feel like I've been torn in half." You groaned the next morning, your head on Jaemin's shoulder. "I swear, if my vagina hurts anymore, I might die."

"You say that all the time, bunny." Jaemin laughed. "But you still want us to fuck you senseless, right?"

You rolled your eyes. "Whatever. You guys are just lucky I'm built like a goddamn pole. You all can use me however you want."

Renjun chuckled as he joined in the conversation. "I think it's safe to say that there isn't a man alive who doesn't want to bend our little Y/N over and take her for a ride."

"Speaking of rides..." Jeno piped up, placing his hand under your chin and turning your head to meet his eyes, "we have some news to share with you."

Yangyang cleared his throat. "Yeah...we talked about it last night, and decided to take a trip to Busan. We'd thought it would be nice to take a vacation together before school starts."

Jaemin nodded, "We all really wanted to do this. You deserve a nice vacation and this is something that we've been wanting to do for a long time."

"Really? A road trip?" You asked, perking up a bit at the prospect of spending some alone time with the guys.

"Really, really." Haechan said as he walked into the kitchen. He gave you a kiss on the forehead and sat down next to you. "Are you excited?"

You grinned. "Very."

"Okay, great." Haechan kissed you again and then turned his attention to the others. "Well, what do you say, guys? Shall we pack up and hit the road?"

The guys began chattering amongst themselves, discussing what they should bring with them and where they should stop along the way. After they had finally settled on what they were going to bring and where they would stay during their vacation, you stood up from the table and stretched, yawning loudly. "I guess I better get ready for the day. Let me get my bag packed and I'll be ready to go."

"I'll drive today." Jaemin volunteered. "I wanna see if I can break any land speed records."

"Oh yeah?" You asked, feigning surprise. "Should I start counting miles or something?"

He chuckled. "Just relax and enjoy the ride. When you're not fucking one of us, that is."

You rolled your eyes. "Is sex all you guys think about?"

"Only if it's with you, Y/N." Yangyang winked at you. "But yeah, we can't get enough of your pussy either."

Renjun nodded enthusiastically. "Aye, same here. Those cute tits of yours keep me up at night."

Jeno nodded his head, "That sweet, tight little pussy keeps us up at night too. That pussy is seriously the perfect blend of creamy smoothness and dripping wet, wet nectar. Every time I taste it, it's like I've died and gone to heaven."

You groaned and buried your head in Haechan's chest as he let out a chuckle. "Man, you guys are hopeless."

They all laughed as you walked out of the kitchen and headed to the bathroom. You shed your clothes, stepped into the shower, and stood in the hot water as it washed over your skin. With each passing second, you could feel the tension in your muscles slowly leaving your body and you closed your eyes, savoring the sensation.

Just as you started to drift off, a hand suddenly gripped your hip tightly and spun you around so that you were facing Haechan. Burying his face in your wet hair, he whispered huskily in your ear, "Don't fall asleep now, baby. Wouldn't want you to get hurt. Stay awake, okay?"

"Do I finally get some alone time with my Haechannie? Or will the other boys come in and steal me away?" You giggled softly.

"It's just me, love." Haechan said, grabbing the shampoo and dispensing it into his hands. He lathered your hair. "Just you and me."

"I love you, Haechan." You leaned forward and kissed him tenderly on the lips.

Haechan hummed softly as he continued to wash your hair. "I love you too, baby. Don't forget that."

When Haechan was done rinsing you off, he led you out of the shower and dried you off gently with a large fluffy white towel. Once he was satisfied that you were completely dry, he took your hand and led you back to the bedroom. "Come on, sleepy head. Time to get dressed and get going."

After you had put on a pair of shorts and a tank top, Haechan scooped you up in his arms and carried you out to the living room. You watched as he placed you on the couch and hurried over to grab your backpack.

Your stomach grumbled as you looked around the room, noticing that everyone else seemed to be occupied with packing their things.

"Breakfast in fifteen minutes, Y/N." Renjun announced.

Jaemin smiled as he climbed onto the couch next to you, placing his arm around your shoulders. "C'mon, babe. Let's go get some food for you. We'll eat breakfast, then load up the car and leave. Sounds good?"

"That sounds great." You replied and cuddled close to him, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. "Thank you for everything, you guys."

"Aw, shucks. Thank you for coming with us." Jeno smiled as he gave you a peck on the lips. "And you know we wouldn't have gone anywhere without you, right?"

Yangyang kissed you on the cheek and pulled you close. "This trip wouldn't have been the same without you. Just remember that."

"I know." You said and gave him a quick hug.

After all of the guys had finished packing up, they gathered around the kitchen table to eat a quick meal before hitting the road. After finishing off a plate full of scrambled eggs, toast and hash browns, you were stuffed.

"Alright, I think I'm good to go." You laughed as you pushed your plate away from you.

Jeno smiled. "Good, 'cause I don't want to carry you to the car."

You giggled and patted his cheek playfully. "Uh huh, you say that but I know you'd enjoy it too much."

Everyone laughed as you got up from the table and followed Jaemin out of the house. When you reached the driveway, you saw the two cars that were being loaded up.

Haechan opened your door for you and held out his hand. "Ready?"

"Yep!" You grabbed his hand and he helped you climb into the passenger seat of the jeep. Before you knew it, you were backing out of the driveway and heading toward Busan.

As the sky darkened overhead, you glanced outside of the window and noticed that the town had begun to fade into the distance. The mountains that loomed over the valley were growing larger and more prominent, drawing closer and closer until they enveloped the entire landscape, making it impossible to see anything but darkness.

Suddenly, the car stopped moving as Haechan pulled into a rest stop. You watched the other car pull up behind you and soon both vehicles came to a halt.

"Y/N!" Yangyang shouted as he bounded out of the other jeep and made his way to open your door, only to bury his face in your hair. "I missed you."

You patted his head. "Yangyang, we were just separated by cars. It's not the same thing as actually being apart."

Jaemin pouted as he emerged from the driver's side of the other jeep. "Man, he beat me to get Y/N's attention first."

Renjun shrugged and got out of the other jeep, smiling brightly at you. "Well, hello there, cutie. How's my favorite girlfriend doing? Being stuck in the car with Haechan and Jeno didn't make you go crazy?"

You shook your head. "Not even a little bit."

"Good girl." Renjun ran his fingers through your hair. "Now, are you hungry? We have a little while until we reach Busan."

"Actually, I am kind of hungry." You admitted. "What do you guys have?"

"There's some watermelon, grapes and pretzels in the cooler in the trunk." Renjun informed you. "There's also a picnic basket in there with sandwiches and other snacks in it. We also brought along a few bottles of water."

"Sounds delicious." You laughed as you leaned back against the seat. "Now feed me."

Once everyone had finished eating, Haechan switched off the headlights and opened the windows. The cool breeze caressed your cheeks and played with your hair, sending chills down your spine. Your eyes fell upon the mountain range ahead of you and you felt an overwhelming sense of awe and wonder as the deep purple of the night sky glowed eerily in the background. In spite of how dark it was outside, you could clearly make out every detail of the mountains as they rose high above you, looming silently in the night air. The moon cast a gentle glow across the landscape and illuminated every path of its journey, leading you through a picturesque wilderness.

You leaned out the window to watch Yangyang and Renjun converse quietly beside you. Their voices floated through the wind and surrounded you as you listened to the hushed tones of their voices. From time to time, they would look over at you and smile warmly, reassuring you with every glance. You blushed at their constant adoration of you and you tried your best to pay attention to their conversation. They were discussing how busy school was going to be when they returned to Seoul.

"Hey, baby. Are you getting tired?" Haechan whispered softly into your ear.

“Just a little.” You let out a small yawn. “But, honestly, it doesn’t matter. As long as I’m with you, I couldn’t possibly ever be tired.”

Haechan gazed at you lovingly. "Good answer. Let’s take over the backseat when we get back on the road. Jeno can take over the driving while we sleep.”

"That sounds like a wonderful idea." You mumbled, leaning over and kissing him on the lips.

As soon as the car was in motion again, Haechan crawled into the backseat and tucked you in beside him.

"Sleep well, beautiful." He whispered softly. "Love you."

"I love you too." You murmured, snuggling closer to him.

For the next hour or so, you laid there in silence, simply enjoying the closeness of your boyfriend and the feeling of his strong arms wrapped around you. Each time you began to drift off, you would hear a voice murmur softly in your ear, always waking you up within seconds.

"Keep sleeping, baby." Haechan mumbled in between kisses. "Just close your eyes and enjoy the moment."

You closed your eyes, enjoying the casual banter of Haechan and Jeno as they engaged in small talk while Jeno drove. A feeling of contentment flooded your heart as you drifted further and further into dreamland. For once, you were truly relaxed and stress free.

Soon, you found yourself drifting deeper and deeper into sleep, lulled by the soothing sound of Haechan’s gentle breathing and the hypnotic sway of the car as it raced along the winding roads. All too soon, you were lost in a state of blissful slumber.

When you awoke, you blinked a few times to adjust your vision and slowly turned to find yourself nestled against Haechan’s firm chest. His strong arms were wrapped around you protectively, cradling you gently against him. You took a moment to appreciate the comfort of this intimate embrace. To know that someone cared about you so deeply was a truly comforting thought.

You felt the car come to a stop and heard the door unlock as Renjun entered the vehicle. Opening your eyes, you saw Haechan stirring beside you, taking in your awakening state. He quickly moved his arm off of you and rubbed his face as he sat up.

"I guess we've arrived." He mumbled groggily, stretching out his limbs.

You felt Jaemin climb into the car and lean over, handing you a bottle of water. You took a sip and nodded. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure we're here."

The other guys started to unload the jeeps and make their way into the little house that you rented out for the duration of your trip. When they had finally finished and piled into the living room, they each gave you hugs.

"Morning, princess." Jeno murmured affectionately. "You looked so peaceful sleeping during the drive. I didn't want to wake you."

You grinned. "Thanks, Jeno. I really needed sleep."

"Of course, Kitten." Renjun walked over and planted a soft kiss on your forehead. "Don't you worry. We'll take care of you."

You smiled at him gratefully and accepted the kiss. “Thank you. I’m so glad I get to spend this week with you guys.”

“We’re so glad you decided to come with us.” Haechan commented as he walked over and knelt down beside you. “It means a lot to us that you agreed to go on this trip."

"I love you all, you know that right?” You sighed happily. “Every single one of you is my family."

"Hi, dumpling." Yangyang kissed you lightly on the lips. "Looks like you slept well."

You cuddled closer to him. "I did. That nap really helped, especially after that long car ride."

Yangyang smiled. "We're happy to hear that."

He took your hand in his and squeezed it. "How about we grab some food now? I'm sure we're all famished from the long drive."

You stood up and stretched. "Sounds good to me."

"Come on, you guys. Let's go." Renjun called as he led the way into the house.

You followed the others inside and waited patiently for them to finish unpacking and preparing breakfast. Soon, the smell of fresh waffles filled the house and your stomach growled loudly. While you enjoyed the waffles, you took the opportunity to give each man another kiss. They each responded happily, basking in your admiration of them.

While you ate, you conversed with everyone else in the group, laughing and talking merrily as you discussed what they planned to do during the trip. Everyone seemed excited to explore Busan and the surrounding areas and you were eager to follow suit. By the time you had finished eating, it was already past noon.

Haechan pulled out his phone and tapped the screen a few times, bringing up a map of the area.

"Okay, since this is the first leg of our trip, we're gonna need to take things easy." Haechan explained. " Let's rest for the rest of the day and we'll start our activities tomorrow. What do you think?"

You paused for a moment before nodding. "Sure. Sounds good to me."

"Alright then." Haechan checked the time. "Jeno, let's put some music on. No reason why we can't have a party while we relax today."

Jeno nodded. "Gotcha."

Within minutes, he was browsing through his playlist and humming a catchy tune. As soon as he had selected a song, the entire group erupted into cheers and applause. Even you joined in with them and sang along with the lyrics.

As the song continued, you made your way over to Jaemin and plopped yourself in his lap. He smiled warmly and took your hands in his.

"Now this is a surprise. Why is my precious angel sitting in my lap?"

"Oh, nothing much." You giggled. "Just wanted to be closer to you."

Jaemin stroked your cheek softly with his thumb and tenderly cupped your face in his hands. "So sweet. You might as well give me some lovin’ now."

You obliged him eagerly, pressing your body tightly against his as you pressed your lips against his own. As soon as your lips met, sparks flew between the two of you and you felt your heart flutter in excitement. After spending a solid ten minutes of making out with him, you reluctantly pulled away, breaking the connection between you two.

Jaemin gently wiped away the remnants of your lipstick and licked his lips suggestively. "Now I'm expecting more of that later."

With a seductive smirk, you ran your hands over his shirt and pressed your lips to his neck, planting kisses against his skin.

"Are you trying to get the other guys jealous?" Jaemin let out a small huff of laughter. "Because I think it's working."

"Oops." You pouted innocently. "Sorry. Guess I got carried away. I can't help it when I'm with you all. My hormones just run wild whenever I'm near you all. It must be because of how hot you are. You turn me on so easily."

"Mmm…" Jaemin leaned in and nibbled on your bottom lip playfully. "You're right. How am I supposed to focus when you're distracting me like this?"

Your mouth moved away from his, trailing hot kisses down his jawline. As you traced your tongue along his neck, he placed his hand on the back of your head and pulled you closer, deepening the kiss. Every touch of your lips against his sent shivers down his spine and heightened the pleasure you both experienced.

"Oh, Y/N…" He moaned as you pulled away. "Seriously...you're making the others jealous."

You looked over at the others and let out a laugh of your own. It appeared that Jeno and Haechan had taken notice of your display and raised their eyebrows. "I think one of them is ready to throw me over their shoulder and carry me to the bedroom."

Jaemin shook his head, his hands coming to rest on your thighs. "Instead of the bedroom..."

"What are you insinuating, Na Jaemin?" You teased.

Jaemin gestured to the couch cushions. "These cushions look very comfortable..."

You dropped to your knees in front of him and reached for the waistband of his pants. Haechan and Jeno watched on in amusement as you undid the button and zipper of Jaemin's jeans.

"Well, aren't you just the sweetest thing I've ever seen." Jaemin chuckled as you slid his jeans and boxers down his legs, exposing his erect cock. "You gonna suck my dick while the others watch? Because I don't mind if you do."

"You like it when I get naughty, Jaemin?" You smirked.

Jaemin shook his head fondly. "I like everything about you, Y/N."

With a seductive grin, you lowered your mouth to his dick and placed your lips around it. You gently sucked on his length, drawing small moans from his throat. With each stroke, you would take a bit more of him into your mouth until you had taken all of him in. The room was silent except for the moans coming from Jaemin's mouth and the slight slurping sound of you bobbing your head up and down on his shaft.

Soon enough you heard Renjun's soft breathing as he took a seat next to Jaemin, his throbbing erection straining against his jeans. He opened his pants and began rubbing himself over his own bulge, moaning loudly in pleasure. Yangyang sat on Jaemin's other side, already fist pumping his own cock. You watched as Jeno let out a low moan, growing hard as you continued sucking on Jaemin's dick. Haechan kneeled next to you, his hands already rubbing your sweet aching nub as he praised you for taking Jaemin's cock so nicely.

Jaemin's eyes rolled back in his head as he grew more and more aroused, letting out guttural cries of pleasure.

Jaemin grabbed onto your hair, pulling you up to meet his thrusting hips. Your tongue fluttered across the tip of his member and you could feel his body shudder with ecstasy.

Jaemin finally came with a loud shout, shooting his hot cum into your mouth. As you greedily swallowed every last drop of semen, Jaemin collapsed back against the cushions and sighed contently.

You were definitely feeling horny now. Especially after seeing how pleased everyone was with you, wanting to reward you for doing such a good job. While Jaemin caught his breath, you went over to Renjun and tugged at his pants. "Now I'm feeling generous."

His eyes widened as you pulled out his hardened cock and brought it to your lips. "You wanna go again, baby?"

"Mmm...I could suck all of your cocks right now if you'd like me to." You said sweetly, running your tongue around the tip of his dick. "But now I want all of your dicks. In my pussy, in my ass, in my mouth, in my hands..."

Renjun's eyes gleamed with lust as he slid his hands under your short top, lifting it up above your breasts. "Well, isn't this quite the sight?"

Renjun stroked his fingers through your hair and tilted your head up towards his face. "It doesn't matter where you put my dick, baby. All that matters is you feeling good."

You glanced over at Haechan and the other guys, each of them slowly taking off their clothes. Jaemin threw one of the throw pillows on the floor, Haechan taking his position to lay down on it. His eyes were fixated on you, watching as you crawled up his body, capturing his lips in a heated kiss. Your nails dug into his shoulders as you sunk down unto his waiting erection, feeling the fullness of him filling your wet slit.

The smell of arousal was thick in the air and everyone in the room was more than ready to fuck. You couldn't help but feel so damn sexy, wearing nothing but a smile as you lay atop Haechan.

Once you had settled down onto his thick length, you looked up into his eyes. "Ready?"

Haechan laughed. "I'm always ready for you, babe."

You closed your eyes and savored the moment, pressing your naked breasts into his chest. Slowly, you began rocking your hips back and forth, matching the rhythm of your movement with the waves of pleasure that radiated throughout your entire body. Before you knew it, Haechan had his hands on your hips, holding you still as he pounded you harder and faster. You let out muffled whimpers as you arched your back, closing your eyes and soaking in the sensation of being fucked.

You leaned forward, feeling Yangyang positioned himself behind you, his dick lining up with your ass hole.

"Oh fuck." You moaned, feeling both Haechan and Yangyang filling you up. "Yes!"

Yangyang pushed himself deep inside of you, causing you to cry out in pleasure. Both of your holes were stretched beyond capacity by the multiple dicks penetrating them. Yet you didn't care. The only thing you cared about right now was making sure all your boyfriends feel good.

Renjun stood in front of you, dick in hand as he guided it to your mouth. "Open up, kitten. Take my cock."

You obediently opened your mouth and wrapped your lips around his head, sucking lightly. He let out a grunt of satisfaction and withdrew, quickly sliding his cock back into your mouth. With a deep moan, Renjun thrust harder and deeper into your throat, causing you to gag slightly.

You reached for Jaemin and Jeno's cocks, taking both in your hands and stroking them in unison. With a series of movements, you worked them both to a state of orgasmic bliss. Their moans of pleasure echoed throughout the room and filled you with joy. You grinned widely, knowing they were enjoying themselves. You all matched each other's pace; Haechan slamming into your pussy, Yangyang pounding your ass, Renjun shoving his dick down your throat and you fist pumping both Jeno and Jaemin.

Before long, the sounds of grunting and groaning echoed throughout the room, intermingling together to create a beautiful symphony of sex. Each of you became completely lost in the moment, no longer caring who was getting what. Only concerned with pleasing your partners and they pleasing you.

"Fuck, Y/N." Haechan growled, his cock buried balls deep inside of you. "Look at how turned on you are. Seeing all us guys take turns fucking you is driving you crazy, isn't it?"

You nodded vigorously, swallowing thickly as you enjoyed the attention of five rock hard cocks.

"I can tell." He said, bringing his head close to yours. "Tell me, baby. Use your words. Tell me how much you love having us inside of you."

You nodded once again, unable to form any words. Your heart raced and your breath quickened.

Haechan smiled lovingly. "That's it, baby. Feel free to say whatever comes to your mind. Even if it's just some naughty words or an animalistic growl."

You felt Jeno replacing Yangyang's spot from behind you, easing his large dick inside of your ass. "You like getting fucked in the ass, don't you?"

"God yes!" You cried, biting your lower lip. "It feels amazing! And your dick feels so big inside of me!"

Jeno pumped his hips, filling your ass with his dick. "How does it feel?"

You felt Haechan's hands come to rest on your hips, keeping you steady as he thrust deeper into you. "So good...fuck. Fuck. Oh god. Yes."

Jeno pulled out and slammed back into you, his body moving in sync with Haechan. "Let's hear you say it again."

"Ugh. Uhhuhu..." You moaned as the feeling of two dicks sliding in and out of you grew stronger.

Yangyang positioned himself in front of you, his dick slapping against your cheek. "Come on, baby. don't forget about us."

You couldn't help but swallow up his dick, Renjun and Jaemin in your hands at the same time. Your lips parted and you gasped as he pushed his way past your tongue. It felt so warm and good, almost surreal. A delicious mix of sensations rushed through your body, pushing you over the edge into another intense climax.

You moaned and whimpered as the world began to spin around you. This orgasm felt like it lasted forever.

Jaemin and Renjun eyes were locked on you as they stared at you from above, witnessing your passion as they coated your body with their hot jizz. Yangyang couldn't help but hold your head against his cock as he let himself go, grunting loudly as his seed filled your mouth. You felt Jeno's dick stiffen before unloading his cum in your ass and Haechan's cock pulsed several times as he finished filling you up with his seed.

Once the orgasms subsided, the six of you curled up together in the pile of cushions, lazily chatting and caressing each other. Soon, you all fell asleep, lulled by the soft melody of the song playing in the background.

You awoke to find yourself nestled snugly in Haechan's arms. You stretched your limbs and yawned widely, looking around the room curiously. Everyone was still fast asleep, the sunlight streaming through the windows casting beautiful colors on the sleeping faces of the boys. For a moment, you lingered, content to watch the guys sleep.

You wiggled out of Haechan's embrace and winced from the aftermath of all the fucking and sucking that had happened last night. As you rose to your feet, you saw Renjun stirring beside Haechan. He lifted his head and blinked several times before looking at you. A smile crossed his face as soon as he recognized who it was.

"Good morning, gorgeous." Renjun whispered. "Didn't know you had it in you."

Your cheeks flushed and you could feel your face growing hotter by the second. "No more gangbangs for the next few weeks. I'm so sore."

Renjun laughed quietly. "Aw, poor little thing. Whose fault was it to have everyone all at one time?"

"Shut up." You pouted playfully. "You knew what kind of person you were dealing with."

Haechan stirred and groggily got to his feet, rubbing his eyes. He gazed at you with sleepy eyes and stroked your cheek affectionately.

"Morning, love." He murmured. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I could crawl into bed and never leave." You answered honestly. "If I ever ask for another gangbang, I need you to intervene. I can't handle it."

Haechan kissed you on the forehead. "Don't worry about it, darling. If you really don't want to experience another round, I'll make sure that you don't. Promise."

The rest of the guys woke up, each asking how you were feeling from last night. You told them that your legs and back were aching but you otherwise felt fine. Each of them nodded solemnly, having been present during last night's event.

"Sorry, Princess." Jeno muttered. "Maybe next time we won't do it all at once."

"I'm banning sex from all of you." You retorted, rolling your eyes. "Please let my vagina rest."

Everyone burst out laughing, happy to see you feeling better. After breakfast was prepared and served, everyone showered and dressed before heading outside. It was a beautiful day today and it made you glad that they didn't decide to cancel the trip. They had gone swimming earlier in the day, bringing you along to splash around with them. You and the others spent the entire afternoon laying on the beach, soaking up the sun and listening to music. At dinner, you enjoyed the seafood you ordered while watching the waves crash against the sand. By the end of the evening, you couldn't help but fall asleep in Haechan's arms, lulled by the gentle rhythm of the waves.

[vettelsvee]

GOODBYES ARE BITTERSWEET | Sebastian Vettel ✩₊˚.⋆ PART 2: LOVING HIM WAS RED [PREVIOUS PART] [NEXT PART]

goodbyes are bittersweet masterlist f1 masterlist | ao3 | requests or let's talk!

ferrari sebastian vettel x ex gf!female reader

word count: 3972

summary: seb, after not knowing about her for almost five years, finds out that y/n just went viral on youtube after posting a song that might be written about him

warnings: settled on april 2018 and narrated on seb's pov. curse words, mentions of sex and one night stands. apart from that, just a little bit of background story from seb and reader's relationship

taglist: [@saltycomicsanimalssalad @hc-dutch @mycenterfold @simplyamberj @spitesfvl-blog @jaydaaasworld @lottalove4evelyn @zoeyjadetice2010 @nhfls @jehun @ferralari @cosmoscoffeee @mcmuppet @myescapefromthislife ]

a/n: i know i'm supposed to be posting oscar fics but migraine is killing me today (been quite stressed for the past few days i believe). in the meantime, as i already had it written, here you have part 2 of goodbyes are bittersweet! hope you liked it as much as you liked part 1 (even if it's a bit different). part 3 coming tomorrow if you want so? PLEASE let me know your thoughts and opinions in comments! feedback is appreciated, as well as reblogs <3

© VETTELSVEE (2024). please, do not steal, copy or translate my works. thanks for reading!

2018 April 27th Baku, Azerbaijan

Sebastian

I woke up as soon as I felt the sun’s rays hitting me in the face, and at the same moment I noticed a surprisingly strange warmth next to me, in bed.

I looked at my phone and saw that it was already half-past seven in the morning. Not only had I realized that my alarm hadn’t gone off and I had overslept by an hour and a half, but it was also Y/N’s birthday.

Like every year, there was no response from her to the email I had scheduled to be sent at midnight. 

After almost five years of knowing the bare minimum about her and having seen her a couple of times from afar in Heppenheim, I knew why, deep down, I kept doing it. I still loved her as much as the first day, or even more. I hoped for a reunion where we could tell each other about our lives and start a simple friendship as if nothing had happened, as if she hadn’t chosen to leave my life and act like she didn’t know me.

I decided to turn over to see what was getting closer and closer to me, almost pushing me off the bed. It wasn’t hard to find myself face to face with blue eyes that were not the green ones I had dreamed of that night.

Suddenly, memories from just a few hours ago started to form in my mind. A few beers I shouldn’t have had at a local pub just because I wanted to escape the blurry memory of Y/N were responsible for me meeting this charming young woman with a wonderful smile.

My head couldn’t piece together how we ended up here, but I suppose her insistence, my invitation for her to accompany me to the hotel, and possibly a taxi ride I paid for were the final results of the goal to escape reality. 

This had been my routine since I realized my ex-girlfriend wasn’t coming back into my life. I didn’t like being this way, and although I had tried to find a stable partner, kindness, fun and a temporary refuge had been the best way to try to forget Y/N Y/L/N, who always found a way to slip into my thoughts at the least expected moment.

I quickly got out of bed and, almost without thinking and without needing to undress, jumped into the shower and did my best to let the warm water make me forget everything I had allowed to happen the night before. I closed my eyes and let myself go as much as I could. I tried to organize my thoughts and find the easiest possible way out of the problem I had gotten myself into, but it was impossible to find one that worked.

I got out of there faster than I would have liked. When I returned to the room, with just the towel wrapped around my waist, leaving my entire torso exposed, I found the person I had been avoiding at all costs.

The brunette was already stretching in bed, dawdling and, surely, not wanting to leave.

“Would you mind leaving?”

My rhetorical question made her just look at me in surprise, her eyes still sleepy.

“Why, Seb? Can’t we spend the day together? I could go with you to the paddock and repeat what we did last night in your room or whatever you call it,” she suggested with a playful smile. “You know as well as I do that it would be fun.”

I felt a knot forming in my stomach at her suggestion. It wasn’t that I hadn’t enjoyed her company or was forbidden to do so, but the simple fact of knowing who was turning thirty today, and that this exact proposal was something I used to do with her...

“I don’t think it’s a good idea...” 

Damn, I didn’t remember her name.

“Alessia.”

“That’s it, Alessia,” I confirmed. “You know how these things are and what it could mean for us to be seen together. We could meet another day as... friends.”

Neither my response nor hers were what the other expected. After hearing her name, I remembered the brief introduction she gave me: a musician just starting out and a member of a highly successful Italian orchestra.

An Italian version of Y/N and, unfortunately for me and possibly the blonde, a successful one.

“The way you moaned my name last night so many times is not something friends usually do. You made me feel special last night. A lot, in fact.” 

“I’m sorry, Alessia, that wasn’t what I meant,” I clarified, my cheeks blushing slightly at her statement. “I hope you enjoyed what we did last night, but it’s time for you to get dressed and go back to your hotel or wherever you’re staying. I have to go to work,” I added, trying not to succumb to her obvious charms. 

After several more attempts to convince me, the girl finally resigned herself and reluctantly accepted my suggestion. I felt uncomfortable when she threw off the sheets and began to gather her clothes, completely naked. I felt even worse as I watched her slow and deliberate movements, as if she were prolonging the inevitable farewell and trying to arouse me. 

I bit my lip and refrained from doing or saying anything when she asked for help zipping up her dress. I could have said no, but I didn’t want to seem rude, especially considering that the time I spent with her had made me feel just as I had with my ex-girlfriend. 

Once we were finished, the Italian approached me with determination. Before I could react, her lips sought mine with clear intention. I instinctively turned my face, causing the kiss to land on my cheek instead of my lips. 

“Alessia…” 

What could I say in a situation like this? Did she deserve the hurt I was going to cause her even though we had only had a night of wild sex, like so many others I had had with other girls? 

“I’m sorry,” she murmured hastily, looking away. “I thought… you know, that we could have something more than just a one-night stand.”

My heart sank at her words, and as I had already foreseen, because it always happened in these cases, guilt overwhelmed me. 

I knew I had been unfair to her by allowing this to happen, by letting her believe there could be something more between us, and that the problem was hers when the only one to blame was me, who hadn’t gotten over the love of my life after four years, now closer to five, of no contact. 

“Alessia, you’re an incredible person,” I began to say, trying to find the right words and not hurt her more, “but right now, all I want to focus on is my work and working on myself. It wouldn’t be fair for you to be part of all this and end up getting hurt.”

“I understand,” she said softly, nodding with a sadness that, although expected, still surprised me. “Thank you for letting me spend this night with you, Sebastian.”

I felt overwhelmed and at the same time a great mixture of relief and remorse as I watched her leave without even looking back. 

When enough time had passed to be sure I wouldn’t run into her, I went down to the hotel lobby still feeling that heaviness invading me. I tried to shake off all of them, but as soon as I saw Britta standing in front of the entrance, arms crossed and with an angry look fixed on me, I knew it was going to be difficult. 

“Sebastian, again?” she asked, full of frustration. 

“Yes, and I’m not going to apologize for something I don’t regret,” I replied sincerely, knowing there was no way to avoid the upcoming conversation. 

“Are you going to keep playing this game much longer?” she reproached as she quickened her pace, trying not to cause too much of a scene or draw attention. “You’ve gone longer than I’d like to say without settling down.” 

“I will when I get tired of sleeping with girls I don’t know, I suppose. Having sex is good for health, you know? Be thankful I don’t cause you many problems after these nights.” 

Britta sighed, and I knew my response was making her lose the little patience she had left. 

“I know you didn’t ask for my opinion, but I think what would make you tired of sleeping with strangers almost every Grand Prix week would be to have some kind of interaction with Y/N.” 

The mention of the blonde’s name made the wave of emotions I had tried to bury for years resurface, hitting me suddenly. 

“You know I can’t do that. It’s impossible. I’ve tried, but she doesn’t want to cooperate.” 

“You should at least try once again, at least. I know there’s nothing, nor anyone, who can change her mind,” and it was true. Y/N was the most stubborn person, for better or worse, that I had ever met in my life. “But I also know that if you keep avoiding facing your feelings and trying to forgive yourself for what happened, you’ll never find the peace you’re not only wishing for but also deserving of.” 

“I know, Britta, but…” 

“But what, Sebastian? It’s just that…” 

“Have you ever heard of the invisible string theory?” 

She raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised by the change of subject and possibly for not letting her finish. She slowed her pace, and for the first time in the short time we had been together that day, I felt calm and even understood. 

“Yes, I’ve heard something about that,” she said after a few seconds that felt eternal. “What does that have to do with getting over your ex-girlfriend?”

“Well, everything, really,” I declared. “Y/N and I dated, if you can even call it that, for ten days during Christmas of ’99. She was 11, and I was 12, and I was a bit stupid because I ended up breaking up with her when I fell for a classmate who had just moved to Heppenheim and who eventually started dating my cousin.” 

“But…”

“Then Y/N and I became friends again,” I continued, trying not to let her interrupt my impromptu speech, “and it took six years until she told me she loved me. I didn’t want to admit my feelings and decided that not talking to her for four months was the best, not even to offer my condolences after her grandmother’s death… And look, in the end, I asked her to go out with me!”

My PR sighed, possibly tired of hearing that story once again, a story I never got tired of telling because sometimes reality was weirder than fiction.

“I’m going to tell you what I’ve always told you since Y/N left, and I don’t care if you don’t want to hear it: you’re still clinging to the hope that everything will go back to how it was, even though you know it’s not possible,” she said without a hint of doubt. “Even if you ran into her and had a deep conversation, your lives have changed. At least yours has, and I’m sure hers has too.”

“I mentioned the invisible string theory because I feel like there’s something else. I feel, besides there being something unknown that ties us together for some reason, that the third time's the final one,” I finally confessed.

My confession seemed to have caught her off guard. Now, she slowed, and she was passing her accreditation to enter the paddock much more slowly than she usually did.

Maybe she was right, that I was holding on too tightly to the hope that everything would go back to how it was before, but I had been dreaming about Y/N again for many nights after months without doing so. It had never happened before, but the last few days had felt like she had never left my life and had always been there, just apart.

The last time I had that feeling it ended with me seeing her from a distance playing with a little girl she was probably babysitting to earn some extra money.

Obviously, I didn’t dare to approach her because she seemed... happy. Quite happy, actually.

“I’d like to keep talking about this, but I want you to stop thinking about Y/N, at least for a few hours, and focus on today,” my PR’s change in tone let me know she was serious. “We have a lot to do.”

“Then enlighten me, master.”

“First, you have a meeting with the team to discuss possible strategies for practice and what might work for tomorrow’s qualifying,” the blonde began to explain, taking out her planner and going over the day’s schedule. “Then I think you have an interview with SkySports with Nico Rosberg, and maybe a talk for a collaboration with a brand, but I have to check that again.”

“What time am I supposed to meet with the engineers?”

“Around nine-thirty, but...”

I yawned, not bothering to cover my mouth as my PR continued talking. The heaviness in my eyelids was getting worse, and I felt the exhaustion from the previous night starting to take its toll. I looked at my phone and saw that, unfortunately, it was only eight-fifteen.

Was the day going by that slowly?

“Understood,” I replied, pretending I had been paying attention to everything Britta had said. “By the way, do you mind if I go to my driver’s room to have some rest?”

“Sebastian...”

“I had a fantastic night,” I admitted, causing her to cross her arms and once again look at me with a stern expression, “but I didn’t sleep at all, and if I want to perform well, I need to sleep at least for a bit.”

“You have forty-five minutes at most,” the blonde snapped. “Don’t you dare be late, or we’ll have problems. Set your alarm and make sure your phone is on in case someone calls you.”

It won’t be Y/N, that’s for sure.

“I will, don’t worry.”

I left Britta after exchanging a few more words with her and hurried as much as I could. With every step I took, I felt more tired. I knew I should have slept at least six hours, but I succumbed to the temptation last night to, why not say it, have a good time and, as was more than obvious and had become routine since 2014, try to succeed in the mission of forgetting Y/N on her birthday.

Another year, it had been impossible.

I didn’t know if it was due to lack of sleep or lack of attention, but the voices around me seemed increasingly distant. The only thing I could hear as I walked through the pit lane was a growing murmur where the words “viral” and “song” seemed to be the main topics, especially from the mouths of Max, Daniel, and I’d swear Charles.

“Have you heard this song?” I heard Verstappen say. I stopped when the first piano chords began to play. “It’s like a pandemic; it’s everywhere.”

“I don’t know who the girl singing is, but she’s incredibly talented,” Ricciardo continued. “Do we know who...?”

“You don’t know if it’s a girl!” Leclerc reproached, hitting the Australian on the arm. “What if it’s a guy with a high voice?”

I laughed at the younger guys' antics, wondering if my former teammates saw me that way when I was their age.

Losing him was blue like i’d never known Missing him was dark gray all alone Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met Cos’ loving him was red

If my eyes were almost closing automatically, after hearing the chorus, or whatever it was called, it felt like I had taken an energy drink that had woken me up.

The moment that voice, both raspy and sweet at the same time, penetrated my ear, my hair stood on end. Its familiarity was incredible… but no, it couldn't be her. It was impossible.

"God damn, who can play the piano while singing?" 

"I have two questions," Daniel blurted out, ignoring Charles' words. "The first one is who the fuck it could be, and the second is how the hell they've gotten so much attention out of nowhere."

It's Y/N, who else could it be, I thought.

I tried to control all kinds of thoughts that were running through my head. I knew my ex-girlfriend's voice perfectly, and the one coming from the Dutchman's phone was quite similar to hers.

"Maybe it's a marketing strategy. At least that's what Fernando thinks," Max always had the Spaniard's name in his mouth. "What if it's a marketing strategy by some record label? It could be a plan to generate interest in an artist or a song."

"I highly doubt it. If they wanted to do that, the YouTube account wouldn't be named 151206010614."

Lewis appeared next to me out of nowhere. Quickly taking off his headphones, he also unplugged them from his phone, letting the song play at full volume.

"Seb, are you okay?" insisted the Brit.

"Yes, yes. I was just a bit distracted," I hurried to say.

He didn't seem very satisfied with my answer, but I didn't care. The only thing I was thinking about at that moment was how much I wanted to get to the hospitality area, and how much I wanted to take a micro-nap at this point.

"Are you also distracted thinking about that anonymous person?"

"I can't be distracted by someone I know nothing about other than what I've heard from them," I replied, pointing to the three drivers who were still engrossed in the conversation about the topic.

"I've managed to hear a bit, yes," replied the dark-haired one. "I think I understand music a little more than they do. I'm almost sure it has nothing to do with a record label, and that someone simply uploaded it without any expectations. And look how it went from them."

I looked at him intrigued, understanding little to nothing of what he was saying.

"Since you look confused, I'll explain a bit," Hamilton continued, realizing that I didn't seem to understand much. "It seems they uploaded this song, which happens to be called Red, to YouTube," he hit play and put it on again, now from the beginning, "It seems to be about a failed relationship, but no one knows who sings it or what the real story behind it is."

"Does no one really know anything?" I insisted, finding the situation very strange.

Why was the voice only familiar to me? Could it be because today was Y/N's birthday, and everything reminded me of her much more than usual?

"The only thing we know is that the song is wonderful. Really, I don't know who’s behind this, but if they discover that girl, if it is a girl, and give her a chance, I’m almost sure she can achieve great things."

We decided to move a bit further down the pit lane, exchanging a few words with those we met. Lewis kept talking about the song. I couldn't stop thinking and analyzing the melody, the lyrics, the voice, and especially the user. I knew there was something hidden behind that combination of numbers, and now the priority of sleeping a bit before the first free practice session had taken a back seat.

I tried all possible combinations. Numbers from front to back, in pairs, trios, and even quartets, but nothing seemed to convince me. While the melody of Red continued to resonate from the Mercedes driver's iPhone, my mind kept trying to get the information because something inside me, which was nothing like the feeling I had every April 27th, knew it was Y/N.

I managed to come up with the supposed answer shortly after, recalling some of the important dates for us. If I divided the username into three different sections, with two pairs of numbers each, the first one corresponded to June 15th, 2006.

That was the day I asked Y/N to be my girlfriend. 

If that was right, the second pair of numbers corresponded to January 12th, 2014. I was no longer dating Y/N at that time, but I knew her perfectly, and not to brag, but I was convinced that date must be extremely important to her if it was alongside our anniversary.

I wish I could know what it is that about.

“Are you listening to me?”

Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes

Tell myself it's time now, gotta let go

But moving on from him is impossible

When I still see it all in my head

In burning red

I ignored Lewis after hearing, for the first time paying extremely attention, that bridge. 

Somehow, the song described my feelings perfectly, and I didn’t know why I felt that way. I couldn’t let go of Y/N, not when she had been, and still was, the love of my life. 

I entered WhatsApp almost automatically and went into Y/N's profile. She had no profile picture, but I knew perfectly well that it was her because her contact was still saved with the same name. I quickly wrote to her that I knew it was her hiding behind the song and that somehow, I knew she was talking about me. 

I saw Britta approaching us quickly. She was also engrossed in her phone, her fingers constantly moving over it. I didn’t pay much attention to her because once I showed my desperation to Y/N, I moved on to conveying it to Hanna, trying to convince her to reveal that it was her best friend. 

“Seb, we need to talk,” Roeske hurried to say, almost out of breath. Her gaze was still fixed on her device.

“Britta, I can’t right now, I’m sending…”

“Sebastian Vettel, this is serious.”

When she yanked the phone from my hands and I made eye contact with her, I assumed things didn’t seem to be going very well. The moment she turned her gaze to Lewis and he walked away, patting me on the shoulder, I knew.

“What’s wrong with you?” I asked, quite angry. “Why are you acting like a neurotic who seems to have lost a million euros on a ridiculous bet?”

“I don’t want you to answer anything related to that song that went viral, Red. I’m telling you, Sebastian, don’t you dare answer anything about that damn song.”

And again, this was another sign that happened to make me feel like I hadn’t gone crazy.

“Sebastian, trust me,” Britta remained firm in her expression, crossing her arms. “I don’t want you to get into trouble because the song was uploaded by…”

“Y/N.”

I saw the answer in her eyes. I knew her and knew she longed to answer me and at the same time, she didn’t. 

Britta knew that, but I also had the feeling she seemed to want to hide something.

“It’s her the one singing, right?” I insisted, but she didn’t answer. “Britta, please: tell me.”

I was desperate, and it was more than obvious. A sigh and a few seconds filled with uncertainty preceded her response:

“If you already know, why do you ask me? You know the sunshine of your life, as you still call her, much better than I do. Of course it’s Y/N,” she revealed, lifting a great weight off my shoulders and, above all, making me believe I could have faith in the future.

[burreauxsworld]

Locked In (1) | Joe Burrow

Joe Burrow x Singer!Reader

Exboyfriend!joshallen x Exgirlfriend!reader

•••

Being in the spotlight isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Yeah, there’s glitz and glamour and getting to live out your dream you’ve had since you were a little girl, but deep down you’re still human, with normal human emotions. Emotions that are completely normal, even when people tell you to never show them. You honestly were doing so well considering the circumstances you were left with. A completely shattered heart, an album that had just dropped (full of love songs written about the person that shattered your heart), and a sold out stadium tour that would take place over the entire summer. You were thriving. Slowly but surely, your heart mended itself back together every time you took the stage. Nothing could stand in your way.

Then football season rolled around and people started noticing that you weren’t in your normal spot, in a suite at Highmark Stadium. Supporting the man you believed you would spend the rest of your life with. Even had the ring to prove it. But it all came crashing down the night you walked in on him in bed with his ex from college. It absolutely crushed you. Especially because Josh Allen seemed like the perfect guy. He treated you well, showed you off in public, spoke about you in post-game interviews, the whole nine yards. You never would have saw this coming in a million years. But it did, and it felt like the worst day of your life.

Pre season wasn’t too bad, people just assumed you were busy. Then week one came and you still weren’t there, and people started to question things. Headlines quickly made their way into the world, it was mentioned in sports news all over the country, and you and Josh had started to trend on Twitter. It was all mixed feelings. Mostly just men that were happy to see you go, the women tearing Josh down, and some fans that were devastated about the split. You never commented on the topic. You figured you’d let it die down, and at some point it would be addressed in a normal adult way.

Josh had other plans.

He’d gone on a podcast for barstool sports, and when asked about the topic he didn’t shy away from lying to the entire world. “We both have pretty busy lives. She was going to be starting her tour and didn’t really have a lot of time on her hands. There’d be times where she’d go days without reaching out to me. I just couldn’t live that way anymore”

You were dumbfounded. Completely and utterly baffled. “Brittany and I reconnected last season when we played the Chiefs. It had been such a long time since I’d seen her. We kept in touch. But assure you, there was no crossover. I’d never even think about cheating on a woman”

Blow number two. The cheating had went on far longer than you’d realized, and right under your nose. You were too busy catching up with Taylor Swift in the suite to notice that your fiancé met up with his ex. “I think I’m the happiest I’ve been in a while. I can’t speak for Y/N but I can honestly say for myself that I checked out of that relationship a year before it ended. I could not physically live that way anymore”

You couldn’t watch anymore. You powered your phone off and threw it to the end of your couch. Tears streaming down your face, your heart feeling like it shattered all over again. He’d just proposed to you in July of last year, the two of you started planning your wedding for the off season. It was all a lie.

You thought about retaliating. Putting him on blast the same way he did you, but that wouldn’t make you feel better. At this point, you weren’t sure what would make you feel better, but you knew you couldn’t be sad over him anymore. You needed to pick yourself back up.

•••

2 days later

You laughed hysterically as you threw your head back. When you realized your management team wasn’t laughing with you, you slowly stopped laughing. “Oh you guys are serious?” You question, dumbfounded. “Absolutely not. I’m not stepping foot into another football game for the rest of my life” you say firmly. “Y/N, it’s just to sing the national anthem, and then you can leave. You don’t have to stay for the entire game” your manager, Ryan, tells you with hope in his voice.

“And what reason am I going to give the media for leaving? That I was a heartbroken little child so I couldn’t stay? That’ll do more harm than good and you know it” you rant, letting out a sigh. “I don’t have a choice, do I?” You question, and put your head down when Ryan makes a face.

“It’s out of my hands. The record label won’t produce your album if you say no”

“When and where?” You say, reluctantly. “Sunday, October 6th, and in Cincinnati. This is the first AFC North divisional. There will be a lot of viewers and attendees already but you singing the national anthem would raise those numbers. The NFL is paying you very well to do this, plus you have a private suite with your name on it if you would like to stay,” Ryan explains, not tearing his eyes from you. He knew how hard this would be for you. He hated even having to ask you to do this.

“I’ll be there. But only because the future of my album rides on this. The NFL literally makes me sick to my stomach right now” you rant, rolling your eyes. “You can’t let one guy deter you from your passion of football. You loved football even before he who shall not be named. Besides, I will be there the entire time, and so will Megan. Megan is kick ass at what she does. All this Voldemort nonsense is gonna be put behind us. Clean slate, Y/N/N” Ryan assures you, and you crack a smile. “Voldemort?” You question.

“Oh yeah, he sucks. He’s lucky you’re giving him the grace that you are, and that you held me back from beating his ass that night” Ryan rants, and you laugh. Grateful that not only is he your manager, but one of your best friends. “But seriously, I’ll be there, next to you the entire day. And a little birdie told me you have some fans on the Bengals. Who knows, you may find a hotter guy that’ll be an upgrade from shit-for-brains” Ryan teases, and you scoff.

“I doubt it. I’ve sworn off athletes. Especially ones that play professional football”

“You say that now,” Ryan winks as he leaves the room, and you roll your eyes, yet again.

•••

Sunday October 6th, 2024

You heard the whispers as you walked past people. The judgmental comments about you neglecting your relationship, how you were the reason for its demise. The awful things people were saying about you, and screaming at you, almost made you want to crawl into a hole and never come out. The worst ones, were the looks of sympathy you got from the women in the stadium. You knew you shouldn’t have agreed to this.

“Ryan, I don’t know if I can do this. They all hate me” you stress, and he’s already shaking his head at you. “They don’t hate you-“

“Slut!”

“Seriously?” You say, with a flat tone. “Okay, so some macho men are just mad that you’re here. Who cares? Y/N, your career is literally riding on this”

“I can get a new label” you retort and Ryan sighs. “Y/N, you got this. You’ve literally dealt with so much worse than this-“

“Y/N, you’re on in 10” an NFL official says, walking past the two of you. You feel like your throat is closing up. There’s a lump that wouldn’t go away. In all the years you’ve been performing for big crowds, this one had you nervous. “Josh turned me into a social pariah when it comes to the NFL. He literally blamed me for everything, Ryan. I shouldn’t be here” you rant, tears brimming your eyes. “You absolutely deserve to be here. And for what it’s worth, I wouldn’t have been upset if you spoke your truth. Damage control is my job, let me worry about that. You just go out there and sing your heart out” another voice chimes in, and you turn your head to see Megan, your publicist.

“It’s time,” Ryan says. “Y/N, keep your head held high. You can do this. I’ll be right over on the Bengals sideline waiting for you to finish” Ryan assures you, as the three of you walk toward the opening to the field. Here goes nothing.

•••

After The Game

You should’ve known that staying at the game would mean Ryan would convince you to go to the after party. Although the game ended in a Ravens win, the team still seemed to be in good spirits. A lot of them were actually a lot of fun to be around. You were originally invited by Ja’Marr Chase, who made a point to come up to the suite and invite you personally. Letting you know that he and a few other guys were big fans, though part of you thinks he was just being nice.

You came in and conversed with him and a few other guys before making your way to the bar, then to an empty booth in the corner of the room. Ryan was mingling with some of the coaches and Megan decided not to attend the party, so you were pretty much left to your own devices. You nursed your dirty shirley as you scrolled through twitter. A lump forming in your throat at the harsh things being said about you.

“You really shouldn’t look at that stuff. I’ve learned that the hard way”

Your head snapped up at the sound of the unfamiliar voice, as the couch dipped next to you. “I hope this seat isn’t taken, though you’ve been sitting by yourself for the last half hour. Not that I was watching like a creep. I promise. I just got tired of standing at the bar” the deep voice rambled. “You’re okay. The seats not taken” you say, a small smile gracing your features.

“I’m just not very popular at the moment” you admit, taking another sip of your drink. “You played really well today, by the way. If you ask me, the Bengals had that in the bag” you say, changing the subject and he scoffs. “Always room for improvement,” he says, sipping his drink. “I’m Joe, by the way” he says, extending his hand to you.

“Y/N,”

“And since we’re voicing opinions, you didn’t deserve to be dragged down in the media. I’m not sure what actually happened, and by no means am I asking you to tell me, but I think it should have stayed private. Josh seemed like a nice guy, but that was a low blow” Joe says, not looking at you, as he yet again sips his drink. You frowned at the mention of Josh, and sank back against the couch. “Thanks, I guess,” you mutter, bringing your glass up to your lips. Joe looks over at you, and mentally face-palms.

“I’m so sorry. I overstepped. I shouldn’t have commented on something I know nothing about,” he says, a sense of urgency in his tone. “I literally came over here with liquid courage, with the intention of getting to know you and I fucked it up by bringing up your ex. I’m such an idiot” Joe rants, leaning back against the couch. You look over at him, a strange feeling in your stomach.

“Joe, it’s okay. You were trying to make conversation-“

“But I could’ve asked like what your favorite color is, not brought up your ex” Joe says, internally beating himself up. “It’s yellow” you answer, and he looks over at you confused. “My favorite color is yellow” you say, and he smiles. “Let’s start over. I’m Y/N Y/L/N,” you say, extending your hand with a smile.

“I’m Joe Burrow. It’s nice to meet you, Y/N”

[peachhcs]

(Lmk if this is too cringy or we’re too much of a cliché or this is just straight up embarrassing IDK I’m on my period and I have a lot of emotions ) maybe a lil blurb on samy on her period being in like an all boys house and will getting her chocolate and being her heating pad 

omg anon nooooo it’s not cliche at all (i love cliche) and i feel like this is so cutie and so mundane and things will just does for samy without her asking

au masterlist

it wasn’t hard to tell that the youngest hughes had been in a bad mood since she woke up. she trudged down the stairs bleary eyed and tired from having tossing and turning all night. she felt bad for probably keeping will awake with her shuffling because he wasn’t in the bed when she woke up that morning.

to make it worse, samy realized she started her period today which just was the cherry on top of one of the boys eating the last of her granola bars and then realizing she was almost out of tampons. so far, it just wasn’t shaping up to be a good morning for the girl.

while her brothers helped their dad with work around the house, samy laid inside on the couch overcome with cramps. the first day of her period was always the worst because of her cramps, back pain, moodiness, and irritation all mixed into one. she didn’t even know where will was. she hadn’t seen him once this morning and that made her sad because she loved waking up next to her boyfriend during the summer and now he was no where to be seen.

unbeknownst to samy though, will had gotten up early that morning because 1. he needed to run errands because he was out of almost all of his go-to snacks and 2. he went out to buy some of the little chocolate hearts he knew samy loved whenever she was on her period. the blonde always knew when her period was coming because she happened to toss and turn every night it came and will could tell by her slight snappiness the last two days that it was probably coming soon because the brunette always got a bit more snappy with people a few days before her period.

he wanted to surprise her, so when he came back into the somewhat empty house he found her laying on the couch watching tv. will carefully tapped her shoulder and samy’s gaze snapped up.

“hi, where’ve you been?” she wondered.

“i was getting more snacks for myself, but i got these for you,” he showed the bag of chocolates hidden behind his back. samy sat up, eyes widening as she eyed the candy.

“willlll, you didn’t,” she smiled widely.

“you got your period this morning, didn’t you?” he wondered and she raised her eyebrow.

“how’d you know?”

“because i just know you. you always toss and turn the night before your period,” the blonde kissed the top of her head and maybe it was her heightened emotions because of her period, but the brunette started getting teary that her boyfriend just knew her so well he got her chocolate without even having to ask.

“will, you’re so sweet. god, i don’t deserve you. sorry if i kept you up last night,” samy mumbled, trying to suppress her tears while the blonde just chuckled.

“you didn’t, but you’re welcome. i love you. i’ll come lay with you in a second, okay?” he said and the girl nodded. will went back to the kitchen to put away his snacks and also restock samy’s granola bars that he happened to notice were gone before he left.

when he came back samy had dug into the chocolates and made grabby hands at him to come lay with her. the boy smiled softly, spreading out across the couch so his entire body was on her legs and his head rested on her stomach. this was how samy liked it whenever she was on her period because will was always so warm, he was her heating pad and she didn’t need an actual one. she ran her hands through his curls and the blonde hummed at the feeling of her gentle fingers massaging his roots.

“want one?” samy wondered and held out one of the chocolates. will happily let her feed it to him and they stayed like that almost the whole day.

the youngest hughes’ mood improved significantly as the day went on and maybe having will by her side made dealing with her period just that much better.

[snowysosturn]

Speeding Car - Matt Sturniolo Part 11

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29

Pairing : y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary : After six years with your boyfriend Alex, you start to mentally check out. At a UCLA party, Alex reconnects with his childhood friend Emily, who proposes a double date with her boyfriend Matt. Your attraction to Matt grows as he pays you the first real attention you've had in years, sparking a complicated emotional journey.

Warnings : MDNI, tension, arguments, mention of physical fight, toxic boyfriend

Matt’s POV

The drive back to my place was suffocating. I could feel the weight of unspoken words bringing me down. Emily was yapping away next to me, about all the sights she wanted to see in Barcelona. Alex sat in the back, his face stern as he stared out the window, lost in thought.

Every now and then, I caught him shifting in his seat, hoping it was unease from regret, but he didn’t say anything about it. I could tell he was still pissed off, probably still replaying the argument with Y/n in his head. I couldn’t stop thinking about it either. Her voice, filled with pain, it had left me feeling some sense of guilt. I knew he was like this, but I still didn’t reach out to her at all over the last 4 weeks.

As we pulled into the garage, I noticed the lights were still on inside. Nick and Chris were probably still awake, maybe waiting up for us. I wasn’t sure how this night was going to end, but the air felt heavy with unspoken words. I couldn’t wait to get out of the car and break the tension, tension that only I was feeling.

We walked into the house, and Nick was the first to greet us. He barely glanced at me before muttering a quick “Hey” and disappearing upstairs to his room. I knew he was still pissed about our argument earlier, and I couldn’t blame him. I hadn’t handled it well. Nick was protective, and when he believed something was wrong, he was like a dog with a bone. I could feel the rift between us.

Chris, on the other hand, was his usual laid back self. He came over, giving Alex a quick nod. “Hey man, you can crash in my room tonight” he said, sounding genuine. “I’ll stay in with Nick.”

“Thanks” Alex mumbled, managing a half hearted smile.

“No problem” Chris gave me a look before heading down the hall to grab his things. I wasn’t sure if he knew what was going on, but his presence was comforting in its own way.

Once Chris was gone, the three of us settled in the living room. We ordered takeout and picked a random movie on Netflix to watch, though I doubt any of us were really paying attention. Emily was curled up next to me, her head resting on my shoulder, but I couldn’t focus on the warmth of her touch. My mind kept drifting back to the argument I had overheard, the way her voice had cracked when she told him how much she had done for him.

Hours passed, and eventually, Emily yawned, stretching her arms above her head. “Think I’m gonna head to bed, we’re up early.” she said softly, her eyes heavy with exhaustion.

“Alright” I replied, kissing the top of her head. “I’ll be in in a bit.”

She nodded, giving Alex a sleepy smile before disappearing down the hallway to my room. As soon as she was out of sight, I turned to Alex, trying to gauge his mood.

“I’ll show you Chris’ room.” I said, standing up. I wanted to talk to him but not here, not with Emily so close by. I needed answers, and I needed to understand what was going on with him and Y/n. The way she sounded earlier, it was like she was at her breaking point.

Alex followed me down the stairs to Chris’ room, his footsteps heavy. The room was a little messy, with clothes scattered here and there, but being honest, Alex didn’t deserve anything more. I closed the door behind us, taking a moment to compose myself before turning to face him.

“So how’s Y/n?” I asked, my voice quieter than I intended. The question hung between us, emotionally charged with everything I wasn’t saying.

Alex snorted, shaking his head dismissively. “She’s.. whatever, man. She’s just being dramatic at the minute. I mean, I get it, she’s pissed off because I’m not spending every waking moment with her, but come on. It’s not like I’m out partying all the time or anything.”

Yeah because you can’t.

“Is she not looking after you in every sense the last few weeks? Do you not think she deserves to be appreciated?” I bit back.

Alex scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Oh, here we go. You’re blowing this way out of proportion. Y/n likes to take care of things, she’s always been like that. It’s not like I asked her to do all that."

His words angered me, and I could feel my fists clenching at my sides. The way he talked about her, like she was just some annoyance, made my blood boil.

“You seriously think that just because you didn’t ask, it means you can take her for granted? She’s doing it because she cares about you Alex, and you’re treating her like she’s disposable. You can’t just brush her off like she’s nothing.”

Alex rolled his eyes, clearly not getting it. “Dude, it’s not like that. She just doesn’t get what it’s like, being on the team, having this pressure. It’s not like she’s doing anything important, she doesn’t even go to college. She’s got all this free time, so yeah, she can help me out.”

Yeah she doesn’t even go to college but is still doing your shitty work for you.

“She’s doing it because she cares about you. The least you could do is show a little appreciation. Instead, you’re acting like she’s a burden.”

Alex rolled his eyes. “You’re being dramatic. Y/n’s fine. She’s not going anywhere. She knows I’m busy. It’s not like she expects me to drop everything for her.”

I stared at him, dumbfounded. She’s not going anywhere. I now know he acts like this because he thinks she’ll never leave. If i could have my way right now, this would be Alex’s second physical fight since I’ve known him. I was so lost in my anger, that no words came out.

“She’s not some fragile little thing.” Alex shot back, a defensive edge to his voice. “She knows how it is. I’ve got my own shit to deal with. I can’t do everything she wants at the drop of a hat.”

“You’re missing the point.” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. “It’s about being there for her. About showing her that she matters to you. Right now, you’re not doing that.”

Alex narrowed his eyes at me, clearly irritated. “And why do you care so much about what happens between me and Y/n? It’s none of your business, she’s my girlfriend not yours.”

Fuck why do I care so much? Why am I defending her like this to him, we haven’t even spoken in 4 weeks. How do I cover this?

“I care because she’s Emily’s friend.” I lied, hoping it would cover up the intensity of my emotions. Fuck was that the best excuse I could come up with?

“And if Emily knew how you’ve been treating Y/n, she wouldn’t be happy about it. You know that.”

Alex snorted, shaking his head. “Emily’s friend, huh? Is that all this is?”

“Yeah, that’s all it is.” I replied, my jaw tight. I had to tread carefully here. “Emily would be upset if she knew you were blowing Y/n off like this. I care about Emily. You care about Emily. Let’s not upset Emily. Oh my god I’m digging a hole right now.. Say something else dumbass.

“I’m just trying to make sure things don’t get worse between you two, you know, keep the friendship group alive.”

Just stop fucking speaking.

Alex’s smirk faded, but he still didn’t look like he was taking any of this seriously. “Look, I’ll talk to Y/n, alright? I’ll smooth things over. She’ll get over it. She always does.”

“Just.. think about what I said, alright?” I muttered, taking a step back. “Before you fuck things up beyond repair.”

For a moment, we just stood there, the tension between us hitting off every wall in the room. I could see the clogs turning in Alex’s head, but instead of admitting he was wrong, he just scoffed again and turned away.

“Whatever, man. I’m tired. Let’s just drop it.”

I wanted to keep going, to make him see how much he was hurting Y/n, but I knew it would be pointless. Alex wasn’t ready to hear it, and pushing him further would only make things worse.

“Fine..” I muttered, stepping back. “Get some sleep.”

As I turned to leave, I couldn’t help but feel a wave of frustration and guilt. I knew Y/n deserved better, but I was powerless to do anything about it. The door creaked slightly as I opened it, and the sound seemed to echo in the quiet room.

Before I could leave, Alex called after me, his voice low and almost reluctant. “Matt.. I appreciate what you’re trying to do. But Y/n and I, we’ll work it out. We always do.”

I paused in the doorway, my back to him. Part of me wanted to believe him, to trust that they could fix whatever was broken between them. But another part of me, the part that had seen Y/n’s tear streaked face, couldn’t shake the feeling that things were already too far gone.

“Just don’t take her for granted” I said finally, not turning around. “She deserves better than that.”

With that, I left the room, the weight of our conversation heavy on my shoulders. Maybe I shouldn’t of said anything, this might get me in trouble. As I climbed back up the stairs, trying to shake off the conversation, I heard quick footsteps echoing down the hallway. Nick was running down the stairs from his room, clearly in a rush.

“Where are you going?” I asked, stopping in my tracks as he reached the bottom of the stairs.

Nick glanced at me, slightly out of breath. “I’m heading over to Y/n’s place. I’m gonna crash there tonight.”

I felt a hit of something..jealousy? worry?..stab at my chest. “Wait, what? Why?”

Nick shrugged, but there was something more behind his casual demeanor. “Just thought I’d check in on her, you know? With everything going on… I figured she could use some company. And honestly, I don’t really feel like staying here tonight.”

His words were like a dig, a reminder of the tension that had been hanging over all of us since earlier. “You don’t think it’s a little... weird? Just showing up at her place?” As if it’s not something I haven’t done before.

Nick gave me a dirty look, one that made my stomach twist uncomfortably. “Weird? Why would it be weird? She’s a friend, Matt. And I think she could use one right now. And besides, we’ve been texting, she knows I’m coming over, she ordered the Uber.”

He wasn’t wrong. After what I’d just heard from Alex, it was clear Y/n needed someone. I just didn’t know how I felt about that someone being Nick. How bad I desperately wanted it to be me.

“You think she’s okay?” I asked, my voice quieter now, remembering Emily is in the next room.

Nick’s expression softened, now bringing his voice to a whisper. “Honestly? I don’t know. She’s been dealing with a lot, and I don’t think Alex is really helping. I just wanna be there for her. Maybe cheer her up, get her mind off things.”

I leaned against the wall, trying to sort through the mess of emotions in my head. “What do you think’s going on with her and Alex?” As if I didn’t already know everything.

Nick hesitated, his gaze shifting slightly. “It’s not really my place to say. But from what I’ve seen, it’s not good. He’s been treating her like she’s some kind of accessory, like she’s just there to make his life easier.”

“Yeah..” I muttered, thinking back to the argument I’d just had with Alex. “He’s a total asshole.”

Nick nodded, his face serious. “Exactly. And that’s why I’m going over there. Someone needs to remind her she’s worth more than that.”

I couldn’t help but feel a sting of guilt. Here I was, tangled up in my own feelings, while Nick was stepping up to be the friend Y/n needed. “You really care about her, huh?”

Nick looked at me, his eyes sincere. “Of course I do. She’s cool, she’s fun to be around, and she’s dealing with all this shit right now. Someone’s gotta be there for her, and I’m not gonna let her go through it alone.”

There was something in the way he said it that made me pause. I realized then that Nick wasn’t just doing this out of obligation or pity, he genuinely cared about Y/n, maybe more than I’d given him credit for.

He started to walk away, but I called out after him, “Nick, wait.”

He turned back, raising an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

I hesitated, then sighed. “Just.. take care of her, okay? I know she doesn’t show it, but she’s probably hurting more than shes letting on.”

Nick’s expression softened, and he nodded. “I will. Don’t worry.”

With that, he turned and headed for the door, leaving me standing there, a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions swirling inside me. I watched as he left, feeling a strange mix of relief and unease.

I walked into my room, Emily fast asleep in the middle of my bed. I tapped her ever so slightly so she would turn over onto her side, so I could get in beside her. The events of tonight replayed over in my head. It was all becoming too much.

Maybe Alex and Emily leaving the country for the next few days is a good thing..

a/n : everyone is still fightinggggg, atleast Emily and Alex are disappearing (kinda) for a bit in the next chapter..

edit: rereading this back as a chapter idk if im the happiest with it but it’ll all make sense as we go along

taglist : @muwapsturniolo @anitahunt @sturnfannn @jayde510 @chrissfavhoe @babyalliah-777 @v33angel @urmom69lol @willowrites @ribread03 @2muchofaslvt @sturnsaver @sleepysturniolo @jcsturniolo11 @jessie-essie @hoeforchrizz @mynbbys @sturniolopanini @mattsturnxoxo @delicatechrry @t77te @sturnsyaper69 @hotdismylife @maggot3647 @ivysturnss @noplaceissafeanymore @mattssgf @yourfavsturniologirl @maethem0nth @sillyponygrl @mattyblover07 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @dominicfikeenthusiast @mattsfavbigtitties

[overadores]

જ⁀➴°⋆ Love Me Like A Friend

When Katseye’s main dancer, Daniela Avanzini makes her debut, no one is aware of her secret friends-with-benefits arrangement with chart-topping producer and singer Y/N L/N—a relationship they’ve kept under wraps due to Daniela’s strict no-dating rule. However, as rumors circulate about Y/N’s supposed affairs with other women, and her enigmatic song lyrics appear to reflect Daniela’s mixed signals, tension starts to build. With public speculation intensifying and jealousy brewing behind closed doors, their closely guarded secret is on the verge of unraveling, compelling them to face what they truly mean to one another.

chapter 39 - make me fall in love again (wc: 970)

The song was so loud it rattled the glass of her window.

Y/N blinked, torn from the soft melody of her own cover, the reverb of the outside music pounding through her walls. She reached for her phone, heart-stopping when she saw the notification.

Manon replied to your tweet: "DANI’S THE ONE PLAYING THAT DUMBASS, GO OUT!"

Y/N shot up from her bed, pulse thrumming. Dani? Here? Now? The same Dani who had broken her heart, who had sent every mixed signal imaginable? The same Dani who had spent weeks making it clear that Y/N was nothing more than a passing fling?

The song was deafening, even through the walls of her apartment. Y/N clenched her jaw. She had told Daniela she was done, that she was moving on. 

But there she was outside.

Standing in the pouring rain, making a scene like a lovesick idiot, a speaker cradled in her arms, drenched from head to toe. Rainwater dripped from her clothes, soaking the concrete beneath her feet, but she didn’t care. 

The song played on repeat, the one Y/N used to hum under her breath when she thought no one was listening—the one Daniela teased her about, called their song. Y/N swallowed down the lump rising in her throat, grip tightening on the door handle.

Y/N yanked open the door, her breath catching in her throat at the sight before her.

Daniela stood there, drenched to the bone, rainwater dripping from her lashes, her grip tight around a speaker blaring the song that had once been theirs. The chorus played on repeat, each lyric a gut punch, a reminder of everything they’d lost.

“Are you fucking crazy? It’s raining! You’ll get sick!”

“I don’t care,” Daniela said, her voice hoarse, raw. “I need to talk to you.”

Y/N exhaled sharply, glancing at the way Daniela’s arms shook, the way her lips quivered from the cold. “You’re already shaking, Dani. Can you at least come inside?”

Daniela shook her head, hair clinging to her forehead in wet strands. “This is more romantic.”

Y/N scoffed. “You look like a drowned cat. This is insane.”

“Then let me be insane,” Daniela said, stepping closer, rainwater dripping from her lashes as she locked eyes with Y/N. “Let me be a mess. Let me tell you what I should’ve told you before.”

Y/N didn’t move, didn’t stop her. Didn’t look away.

Daniela inhaled shakily. “I was an idiot, Y/N. A selfish, careless idiot. I took you for granted, I gave you every mixed signal possible because I thought if I pushed you away first, it wouldn’t hurt so bad when you left.” She clenched her jaw, exhaling sharply. “But you did leave. And it hurt like hell anyway.”

Y/N swallowed hard, the weight of Daniela’s words pressing against her chest.

Y/N’s chest tightened, memories clawing their way back—late nights tangled in sheets, words unspoken between them, the way Daniela’s touch lingered long after she was gone.

“All those times I made you feel like you weren’t enough like you were just some temporary thing—I hate myself for that. I was scared, Y/N. I was terrified of how much you meant to me. So I ran. I convinced myself I could keep things simple, but you were never just something simple.” Daniela’s voice cracked, her hands trembling around the waterlogged speaker. “I tried to push my feelings down, tried to pretend like this wasn’t real, but it was. It is.”

Daniela swallowed. “Those IG stories? They were just friends. I was asking for advice. Because I didn’t know what to do with this—” she gestured between them, voice breaking. “I was so scared of losing you that I ended up pushing you away instead. And that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever done.”

The song looped again, crackling from the rain-soaked speaker, but neither of them moved to stop it.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me,” Daniela said, her voice softer now, heavy with the weight of everything she had left unsaid. “But I had to tell you. Because I do like you, Y/N. I always have. And if there’s even the smallest part of you that still feels the same, tell me.”

Y/N exhaled shakily, the cold pressing in around her, but Daniela’s words burned through, warm and desperate. She wanted to be angry. She wanted to slam the door, make her feel the ache she had felt when Daniela let her walk away. But she couldn’t. Not when Daniela was standing there, drenched and vulnerable, for the first time truly letting herself be seen.

Y/N’s lips parted, her voice barely above a whisper. “Make me fall in love again.”

Daniela’s breath hitched, hope flickering in her eyes like a flame against the storm. And then, before Y/N could say another word, she stepped forward, closing the space between them in a heartbeat.

The kiss was soft, tentative at first—then deeper, hungrier, the taste of rain and salt and everything Daniela had been too afraid to say before. Y/N felt herself melt, fingers curling into the damp fabric of Daniela’s sweater, pulling her in like she was afraid to let go.

Daniela sighed against her lips, whispering between kisses, “I won’t mess this up again. I swear.”

Y/N pulled back just enough to look at her, a small smile breaking through. “You’re still an idiot.”

Daniela let out a breathless laugh. “Yeah. But I’m your idiot.”

Y/N rolled her eyes, but she didn’t pull away. Instead, she grabbed Daniela’s wrist, tugging her inside. “Come in before you get hypothermia.”

As the door shut behind them, the storm raged on outside—but inside, for the first time in a long time, there was warmth.

⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆♱⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺ masterlist next

taglist: @sunshinez4 @haerinkisser @altaroflux @kristalag@1luvkarina @p1hbrook @xochitlisbest @peanutbutterlover05 @goofymickeyr @ourlovesarang @meizinisnumberone @linnnsworld @bandaidss320 @meiphobic @yeetaberry127 @urmom2314 @chaepu @leotapes @gtfoiydlyj @ratzeye @cassiespoiler @wtfisthisnoclueman @bowforgodjihyo @skz-xii

a/n: why does it feel like this is their song?

[airandyeah]

Sins (Alpha Geto X Omega Gojo X Omega Reader) Part.3

My Masterlist Series Masterlist Warnings: Obvious A/B/O dynamics, fated mates, suggestive comments or actions, just generally Minors DNI-just in case. This will be similar to Pink Pony Club, where I just mark every chapter as 18+

The next morning, you wake up with a dull ache behind your eyes and an unsettling weight pressing against your chest.

You dreamt of them.

Of him—the way Geto’s deep voice curled around words like possession. Of him—the way Gojo’s sharp grin unsettled and excited you all at once. Ours.

You hate how it lingers. How their voices refuse to leave you, even in the quiet of your small apartment.

Your cat stretches beside you, yawning lazily as you rub a hand down your face and reach for your phone.

You need clarity.

You press the familiar number, tucking the device between your ear and shoulder as you push yourself out of bed.

The call barely rings twice before your mother answers, her warm, familiar voice immediately easing some of the tension in your chest.

“Sweetheart! This is a surprise. You’re not working today?”

“No, I have the day off,” you murmur, padding into the kitchen to make coffee. “I just… I had a question.”

There’s a brief pause before she responds, tone turning curious. “Oh? What is it?”

You hesitate. Because saying it out loud makes it feel real. Makes it feel like something you can’t ignore.

You clear your throat. “How did you know Dad was your fated mate?”

Another pause.

This one longer.

And when your mother speaks again, her voice is softer.

“Why are you asking?”

You exhale slowly, rubbing at your temple. “Just answer the question, Mom.”

She hums, thoughtful. “It wasn’t like some grand moment, you know? It wasn’t lightning striking or the world stopping. It was… a pull. A feeling I couldn’t shake, no matter how hard I tried.”

Your fingers tighten around the edge of the counter. A pull.

She sighs, nostalgic. “It was terrifying at first. I didn’t want it—I fought it, convinced myself it wasn’t real.” Then she chuckles, warm and knowing. “But fate doesn’t care about what we want. It only gives us what we need.”

Your stomach twists. Because you know what she’s talking about. You know.

You’ve been trying to ignore it, to push it away, but—

That night at the bar. The alley. The way your entire body reacted to them—

You swallow hard. “And if you had kept fighting it?”

Your mother laughs softly. “Then your father would have just kept coming after me. That’s what fated mates do.”

Your chest tightens. Because you know—deep down, beneath all the denial and avoidance—

That’s exactly what they’re going to do.

There’s a pause on the other end before your mother speaks again, her voice laced with curiosity.

“Sweetheart… why are you asking?”

You freeze for a moment, staring down at the countertop, fingers gripping the warm mug of coffee in your hands.

What do you even say?

That two dangerous, impossibly alluring men waltzed into your life, turned it on its head, and now you can’t shake them from your thoughts? That their voices, their scents, their presence refuses to leave you, lingering in every shadow, in every quiet moment, in every breath you take?

That when Geto said, “You know, and we know, that you’re ours,” something deep inside of you responded?

Your mother’s voice pulls you back. “Sweetheart?”

You scramble for an answer, forcing a dry laugh. “Just… wondering. It’s an interesting topic, you know?”

She doesn’t answer right away. And you know your mother—she isn’t easily fooled. A hum filters through the line. “You’re not telling me something.”

You sigh, rubbing your temple. “It’s nothing, Mom. Really.”

She clicks her tongue. “Mhm. If you say so.” But there’s amusement in her tone now. Knowing. You groan. “Mom—”

“All I’ll say is this,” she interrupts, voice warm, gentle, but firm. “If fate is knocking, it won’t stop just because you’re scared to open the door.” Your breath catches.

Because that’s exactly what you’re doing, isn’t it? You’re stalling.

Because the second you acknowledge it—fully, truly— There’s no going back. You shake your head, exhaling as you lean against the counter.

“Thanks, Mom,” you say, trying to sound casual, but there’s an edge to your voice that you know she catches.

She hums knowingly. “Of course, sweetheart. Call me if you ever want to really talk about it.”

You roll your eyes, but there’s a small smile tugging at your lips. “Yeah, yeah. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

The call ends with a soft click, and you let out a deep sigh, rubbing at your temple before setting your phone down.

You move on autopilot, grabbing the coffee pot and pouring yourself a mug, the rich aroma filling the small apartment. Your cat stretches on the counter, flicking its tail expectantly.

“Yeah, yeah, I didn’t forget about you,” you mutter, grabbing a dish and filling it with food before setting it down. The little furball immediately digs in, content.

You, however, are anything but content.

Because as you sit down at your small table, breakfast in front of you, coffee warming your hands, your gaze drifts to your phone.

And to the two new names sitting in your contacts.

King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Your lips press into a thin line.

Idiots.

Your thumb hovers over the screen, itching to delete them. To wipe away the evidence that they’ve already pushed their way into your life.

But you don’t.

Instead, you just stare. You push the thoughts aside, determined to ignore them—ignore them.

Instead, you throw yourself onto the couch, remote in hand, flipping through random shows until you land on something mindless. Something to drown out the lingering weight in your chest.

Your cat hops up beside you, curling into a warm little loaf, purring softly as you absentmindedly run a hand down its back.

This is fine.

A day off. Rotting. No responsibilities. No thoughts. No—

Ding.

Your entire body tenses.

Slowly—too slowly—you glance over at your phone, lying face-up on the coffee table. The screen lights up with a single message.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Sweetheart~ Did you miss me? 😘

Your stomach drops. Because of course. Of course. They wouldn’t let you pretend for long. You stare at the message, brain going completely blank.

Your fingers twitch against your phone, hovering over the keyboard, then pulling back.

Do you answer?

If you do, you’re acknowledging them. Giving them an opening.

If you don’t… well, they don’t seem like the type to be ignored.

Your thumb hesitates over the screen, typing out a single word.

No.

Then you delete it.

Why would I?

Delete.

How did you get this number again?

Delete.

You let out a frustrated groan, tossing your phone onto the couch beside you. Your cat lifts its head at the movement, flicking its tail before resting again.

You sink further into the cushions, glaring at the phone like it personally offended you.

Seconds pass. Then a minute.

Another message comes through.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

You’re thinking about me right now, aren’t you? 😉

Your eye twitches. Your fingers move before you can stop them.

You wish.

The message sends, and the second you see the read receipt pop up, you regret everything.

Because almost instantly, another message comes through.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Oh, I know you are. 😘 No need to be shy, sweetheart.

You grit your teeth, already regretting engaging at all.

Before you can even think of a response, another text comes in—this time from the other contact.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Satoru, stop harassing her.

Followed immediately by—

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

I’m not harassing her, I’m courting her.

You stare at the screen in horrified disbelief. Because this is your life now, isn’t it? You sigh, rubbing your temples before begrudgingly typing out a response.

How long have you two even known each other?

There’s a brief pause before your phone explodes with messages.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Oh? Asking personal questions now? That’s cute. 😏 Admit it, you’re interested.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Over a decade.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Too long.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

And yet you’d be lost without me.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Lies. I’d be thriving. Glowing, even.

You roll your eyes.

Obviously, you’re marked and mated, but for how long?

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Five years.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Five long, miserable years.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Five years of keeping you alive.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Five years of listening to you nag.

You huff out a small, reluctant laugh before shaking your head and typing again.

Are you two married?

This time, the response takes a little longer.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Not legally.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Not yet.

You stare at the words for a second longer than necessary, something twisting in your chest.

Before you can even process it, another message comes through.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Why? Are you thinking about marriage, sweetheart? 😘 All you had to do was say so.

Your eye twitches.

You’re starting to regret asking anything at all. Your phone vibrates again, and this time, it’s from Geto.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

Texting only gets us so far. We should talk in person. Casually.

Your brows furrow. Casually?

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

He means we should take you on a date. 💕

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

That is not what I said.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Sounds like a date to me. 😏

You stare at the messages, torn between ignoring them and throwing your phone out the window.

Talk in person? What do they even want to talk about?

You hesitate, fingers hovering over the keyboard before finally typing out a response.

Where and when?

It takes less than a minute before a reply comes in.

From: King of the Underworld (Hot One) ☠️

I’ll send you the location. Tomorrow night.

From: Your Future Husband (Annoying One) 💍💖

Wear something cute. 😉

You groan, dropping your phone onto your chest.

You have no idea why you agreed to this.

But something tells you—this won’t be casual at all. ~~~ The restaurant is modern, sleek, and upscale, but surprisingly quiet. Dim lighting casts a warm glow over the polished floors, and soft music hums in the background. A few other patrons linger at their tables, but for the most part, the place feels intimate. Intentional.

You shift slightly, smoothing out the fabric of your baby pink dress as you step inside. It’s soft, elegant, but simple—falling just to your knees. The matching boots add a touch of personality, grounding you in a way that your rattling nerves refuse to.

You spot them almost immediately.

Sitting near the back, tucked into a booth like they own the place.

Geto’s posture is relaxed, sprawled against the leather seat with an air of quiet dominance. He’s nursing a dark drink in his hand, watching you.

Gojo, on the other hand, is already grinning. He’s dressed a little less formally than usual, his white hair messy but still annoyingly perfect. He rests his chin on one hand, tilting his head as his mischievous blue gaze sweeps over you.

You inhale, steadying yourself, before walking toward them.

The second you reach the table, Gojo lets out a low whistle.

“Look at you,” he drawls, eyes glinting. “I knew you’d look cute, but this?” His lips curl. “You dressed up for us, sweetheart.”

You roll your eyes. “I dressed up for myself.”

Geto chuckles, motioning for you to sit. “If that helps you sleep at night.”

You narrow your eyes at them before finally sliding into the seat across from them.

The second you do, you feel it again—the weight of their presence.

It coils around you, subtle but unmistakable.

And for a brief moment, you wonder—what the hell have you gotten yourself into? Silence lingers for a beat too long.

You shift slightly in your seat, fingers curling around the edge of the table, while across from you, Gojo sips at a ridiculously pink cocktail through a straw. He meets your gaze with a deliberate slowness, eyes twinkling with something unreadable. Geto, meanwhile, nurses his drink with a steady, unreadable expression.

You clear your throat. Someone has to start talking.

“…So,” you begin, tapping your nails against the polished surface. “Why exactly did you two want to meet in person?”

Gojo perks up immediately. “Why? Did you want it to be a date?”

Your eye twitches. “That’s not what I—”

“Because we can call it a date.” He leans in slightly, smirking. “If it makes you feel better, I’m more than happy to treat you—”

Geto cuts in smoothly, ignoring Gojo entirely. “We figured talking in person would be… easier.”

You huff, crossing your arms. “Easier for what? What exactly are you trying to talk about?”

Gojo makes an exaggerated motion toward you. “See? That’s a good question. You’re asking the real things, sweetheart.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose. “You two are exhausting.”

Geto smirks. “You’ll get used to it.”

You sigh, shifting in your seat before throwing out another question. “What do you both do, exactly?” A pause. Their eyes meet briefly.

“We run a business,” Geto answers vaguely.

“A very successful business,” Gojo adds, grinning. “We handle finances, make deals, take care of… problems.”

Your lips press into a thin line. You’re not an idiot. You already had your suspicions, but hearing it out loud—or rather, not out loud—just confirms them.

“You mean you run the mafia,” you state flatly.

Gojo lets out a bright laugh. “She’s so smart, isn’t she, Suguru?”

Geto doesn’t answer, just watches you carefully. Calculating.

You exhale, resisting the urge to rub your temples. “Why me?”

Gojo hums, tilting his head. “What do you mean?”

You gesture vaguely. “Why are you both so insistent on getting to know me? What is it that you want from me?”

For the first time all night, Gojo’s smile falters—just slightly.

Geto sets his drink down, leaning forward. “You already know, don’t you?”

Your breath catches. Because you do.

Something in your chest tightens, something in your very being hums in their presence.

You can try to deny it, try to ignore the way your instincts pull toward them, but it’s there—undeniable.

Fated.

Gojo’s voice is softer when he speaks next. “We want to hear you say it.”

You swallow, heart hammering.

Because this—this is what you were afraid of.

You exhale sharply, shaking off the uneasy feeling tightening around your chest. If they’re going to make things personal, then so will you.

“Fine,” you say, crossing your arms. “How did you two meet?”

Gojo’s lips twitch, like he’s been waiting for you to ask. “Oh, that’s a fun one.”

Geto exhales, shaking his head like he already knows what’s coming.

“We met when we were kids,” Gojo continues, swirling the straw in his obnoxiously sweet drink. “Boarding school. I was devastatingly handsome, naturally gifted, and had an impeccable sense of humor.”

You blink. “…Right.”

Geto leans in slightly, voice smoother. “He was also arrogant, reckless, and completely incapable of following the rules.”

Gojo grins. “See? He’s always been obsessed with me.”

You stifle the urge to roll your eyes. “And what about you?���

Geto raises a brow. “What about me?”

“You seem… the opposite,” you say carefully. “Why’d you stick around someone who sounds like a walking headache?”

Gojo clutches his chest dramatically. “Wounded. Betrayed.”

You ignore him.

Geto simply shrugs. “Someone had to keep him alive.”

Something in his tone makes you pause.

Gojo laughs, but it’s softer this time, the usual sharpness dulled by something unspoken. “He’s always been the responsible one.”

You hesitate. There’s more to it—you can tell—but neither of them seems willing to offer it up just yet.

So instead, you ask, “What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?”

That gets their attention.

The air shifts.

Gojo goes quiet, the mirth in his eyes dimming just slightly.

Geto studies you carefully, fingers tapping against the rim of his glass. “Do you really want to know?”

Your mouth feels suddenly dry.

Maybe you don’t.

Maybe you really, really don’t.

You clear your throat, suddenly hyperaware of the weight of their gazes. “It’s only fair,” you say, forcing yourself to sound unaffected. “I told you I wasn’t stupid. I know you two aren’t exactly—” You gesture vaguely. “Law-abiding citizens.”

Gojo hums. “That’s putting it lightly.”

You hold his gaze. “So?”

Silence.

And then—Geto tilts his head, considering you.

“I think,” he says, voice calm, measured, “we should ask you a few questions now.”

You blink. “What?”

Gojo grins. “You’re not the only one who’s curious, sweetheart.”

You press your lips into a thin line. “…Fine.”

“Good,” Geto murmurs. “Then let’s start simple—tell us about your family.”

You hesitate, fingers tightening around your drink. “What about them?”

Gojo waves a hand. “Parents? Siblings? Anyone we should know about?”

Your stomach twists.

They’re turning this on you. You shift in your seat, suddenly feeling cornered.

“My family isn’t that interesting,” you say lightly, dodging the weight of their gazes. “My mom’s… overbearing, my dad’s quiet, and I don’t have siblings.”

Gojo hums, swirling the last of his drink. “Overbearing how?”

You frown. “Why do you care?”

He grins. “Because you’re cute when you get defensive.”

You glare. “Are you going to take any of this seriously?”

Geto steps in before Gojo can tease you further. “We just want to know more about you,” he says smoothly. “It’s only fair, isn’t it?”

You exhale, fingers tapping against the side of your glass.

“She’s just… always asking questions,” you admit. “Always wondering when I’ll settle down, if I’m eating enough, if I’ve thought about my future.” You pause. “She’s kind, but it’s suffocating sometimes.”

Gojo tilts his head. “She doesn’t know about us, does she?”

You scoff. “Of course not.” Geto smirks. “Not yet.”

You narrow your eyes. “There won’t be anything to tell her.”

Gojo leans in slightly, resting his chin on his palm. “We’ll see about that.” You don’t like the certainty in his tone.

Before you can push back, Geto shifts the conversation again. “What about your father?”

You hesitate, feeling something twist in your chest.

“…Quiet,” you say carefully. “Always working, not really around much. But he means well.”

Gojo watches you closely. “And you? Do you mean well?” The question throws you. You blink, shifting slightly. “What?”

Geto taps his fingers against his glass. “You asked us about the worst thing we’ve done. Now I’m curious—have you ever done something you regret?”

Your stomach tightens. Because yes. Of course, you have.

You swallow, forcing yourself to hold their gazes. “I think everyone has.”

Gojo hums, like he’s studying you.

“Interesting,” he murmurs, and you hate that he sounds like he’s just confirmed something.

You set your drink down a little harder than necessary. “Why are you both so interested in me?”

Geto’s lips twitch. “You already know.”

You exhale sharply. There it is again. That certainty. That undeniable truth sitting between the three of you.

Gojo stretches, leaning back in his seat. “You can ignore it all you want,” he says breezily, “but fate doesn’t like to be denied.”

You press your lips together, trying to push down the unease creeping up your spine.

“Then fate is going to be very disappointed.”

Gojo grins like he knows something you don’t.

“We’ll see.”

Before you can fire back at Gojo, a waiter appears beside the table, pen poised against his notepad.

“Can I get you anything to drink, miss?” he asks politely, offering a professional smile.

Before you can answer, Gojo leans forward, resting his chin in his palm. “Get her something sweet,” he says smoothly, grinning at you. “Something pretty.”

You glare. “I can order for myself.”

The waiter blinks, caught in the tension.

Geto, as composed as ever, gestures lazily. “She’ll have whatever she wants. And bring out some appetizers while you’re at it.”

You shift in your seat, suddenly feeling like you’re losing control of this conversation—of this whole night.

The waiter nods, jotting it down. “Any preferences?” he asks, looking at you now.

You huff. “Something not too strong. A fruitier cocktail, I guess.”

Gojo beams. “Knew you were a sweet drink type.”

You resist the urge to kick him under the table.

The waiter clears his throat, turning back to the others. “And for food?”

Geto orders an assortment of things—small plates, nothing too heavy—and once the waiter disappears, you let out a sharp breath.

“Do you always do that?” you ask, narrowing your eyes at Gojo.

He tilts his head. “Do what?”

“Speak for people.”

His smirk widens. “Only when I know I’m right.”

You scoff. “That’s not how that works.”

Geto chuckles, swirling his drink. “You’ll get used to it.”

You narrow your eyes. Like hell you will. You sip your drink when it arrives, the fruity sweetness coating your tongue. Surprisingly, the conversation starts to flow more naturally. Maybe it’s the drink, or maybe it’s the fact that, despite their intensity, they’re easy to talk to.

You’re mid-sentence, recounting how someone at work nearly spilled an entire tray of drinks on you, when you casually say, “Not that my man at home would care. He only ever gives me attention when he’s hungry.”

Silence.

You don’t notice it immediately, but when you glance up, you catch the way Geto’s fingers have paused against his glass, how Gojo’s usually easy-going expression has turned just a bit sharper.

“…Man at home?” Geto asks, voice even.

Gojo tilts his head, but his usual grin doesn’t reach his icy eyes. “Didn’t peg you as the taken type, sweetheart.”

You blink. Then—

Oh.

Realization dawns, and a laugh bubbles up before you can stop it.

“Oh my god, no,” you say, waving a hand. “I meant my cat.”

The shift in the air is instant.

Gojo exhales, a hand dramatically over his heart. “Don’t do that to us.”

Geto shakes his head, bringing his glass to his lips. “You should’ve led with that.”

You smirk, taking a slow sip of your drink. “Why? Would that have been a problem?”

Gojo leans in slightly, grinning again—but this time, it feels pointed. “What do you think?”

Your stomach flips. You choose to ignore it, instead shrugging. “Well, you can relax. He’s the only man I have at home, and frankly, he’s more of a menace than any partner would be.” Geto raises a brow. “What’s his name?”

“Moose.”

Gojo snorts. “Moose?”

You grin. “He’s fat and dramatic. It fits.”

That seems to amuse them both, and the tension fully eases.

For a moment, it feels normal. Like you’re just three people enjoying a meal together.

You know better. But you let yourself sink into it just a little longer.

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