#eventually sapphic because i am me

[youryanderedaddy]

tw: female reader, dub-con to con, degradation, sapphic

I am thinking about a bitchy, pretty mean girl who drunkenly corners you at a party and drags you to her room. She throws you to the bed and resumes smoking her cigarette - watching your feral movements with the corner of her eye. You make a run for it, and she simply hisses, mildly annoyed at the fact that she has to let go of her cigarette and deal with your little tantrum.

"You're not going anywhere, nerd." Her thin eyebrows narrow, eyes full of boredom and just a bit of a sparkle. You ignore her words and head for the door, but you're quickly pushed against the nearest wall. "I told you to stay here, loser. I am not going to repeat myself." The blondie whispers against your throat and you freeze, surprised at her display of strength - turns out cheerleaders are pretty damn strong when they want to be.

She then sleazily shoves her tiny hand up your bra, roughly groping your tits. You hold back a moan - you can't let her know you're enjoying this. After all she did make your first year of college a living hell.

"Open your mouth." Jess orders, growing more and more agitated at your protests - but you just clench your teeth. "Don't wanna." You mumble, just slightly bratty - but you can't deny the way your thighs start shaking under her hungry, lustful gaze. You've never felt so desired before.

"Oh, I know what you want, you little bitch." The cheerleader smirks with that nasty little grin she has on when she's scheming how to ruin some poor wimp's life. "You want to fight and squirm, and eventually lose yourself underneath me." She moans in your ear, and it's the most pornographic sound you've ever heard - so your cheeks heat up. "Because that's all you are, right?" Her fingers find your slit and start rubbing tight little circles around your swollen clit. "Just a slutty little toy I can fuck whenever I want." She bites your neck, making you arch your back involuntarily. "It's all little nerds like you are good for."

You close your eyes, breathing through the intense, red - hot pleasure. Fuck. You can't keep letting her treat you like this, but when she puts her hands on you, it becomes a losing battle. You arch your back, pushing your body against her.

"Now be a good girl and open up for me." With a low whisper she shoves her tongue in your mouth, and just like that you fall apart, undone.

[tranzjen]

🖤💙 4 days until my Surgery 💙🖤

(Picture taken Dec 9th, 2023)

I'm very very excited for my surgery (it's my second gender affirming surgery but this one is more significant to me since it'll be top and bottom surgery) and I'm obviously counting the days until it and I thought some people might be interested in my trans journey 🏳️‍⚧️ So see part 7 below the cut.

Part 1 here

As the summer was ending, I got really lucky! A lesbian hairstylist (who helped organize the drag show I went in the last update) gave my name to this sales lady who sold accounting work to like companies and she needed help with researching CEO and CFO types. And she paid me out of pocket and honestly it was pretty easy internet research using Google. I felt like a little rat scurrying across the Internet 🐀 So, thank you lesbians 🙏🙏

(Picture taken Nov 6th, 2022)

Apparently I really impressed her so she got me hired full time as a sales admin for her company (I wouldn't have gotten with my lack of a college degree without her) and I've had that job since! And a lot of my transition wouldn't be possible without the pay and benefits of this job. Also this is my first job where I get gendered correctly and I'm slowly getting less anxious about going to the bathroom at work 🥰

She honestly mom'd up on me and bought me a bunch of new business casual clothes for the job. And here's an example of one of my new work outfits 😁

(Picture taken Nov 14, 2022)

Bc of the new job I was able to afford a lot more things for transitioning! Like voice training. I remember when I first cracked I tried to just teach myself using videos but I wasn't good at it 😅 Also a friend during the summer of 2022 helped me and I did make some progress with her help. But, I started making a lot more progress once I started seeing a speech therapist. But, there was a barrier since I could tell she hadn't worked too much with trans people. I went to a speech therapist bc it was covered by my insurance but she moved and then I couldn't find anyone for insurance covered speech therapy. So, I eventually just paid for lessons Your Lessons Now. And, honestly it's going a lot better! It's really nice to be able to talk about my frustrations with voice training with another transfem. The biggest thing I'm learning from here is how to break the bad habit of pitching up my voice by squeezing my vocal chords.

(Picture taken Sept 8th, 2023)

I had also switched to injections and I highly recommend it! A friend even made my first two vials into earrings 🔥

I also got a lot lazier with makeup 😅 I do eyeliner wings, mascara, and blush for when I go into the office. Which for a bunch of accountants means I do about as much makeup that is normal for the women in the office 🤷‍♀️

(Pictures taken October 31st and December 2nd of 2022)

These were two notable exceptions. I really love the makeup I did for the Halloween of 2022 bc I decided to go as a ghost-type trainer. And the one on the right is when I learned how to use concealer to cover my 'raccoon eyes' as my dad liked to call them 🦝

Also this would be a good time to mention something I probably should've mentioned earlier 😅 I never learned how to use foundation. I know it's easy but I have a weird mental block around it 🤷‍♀️ But, in the summer of 2021 I started doing twice daily skincare routine for my face. Which took me from a very acne heavy face to people being surprised I'm not wearing foundation. Also the routine is really nice. Would recommend to those who want to get rid of their acne (send an ask if you want to know specifics).

(Picture taken Aug 20, 2023)

Romance update since I've been doing that lol: Well, things ended with all the girlfriends I had so I am down to 1 partner. And I got caught in a romance scam for a few months 😭 However, I can't really complain because I got engaged!!! It was so sweet in cute. My partner and I had this date the night before Valentine's Day under a statue outside of a local art museum. We read sapphic poetry by candle light and then they popped the question 🥰🥰

But, I say another big part of this era was I made a lot more local trans friends. Went to a good amount of house parties which would've surprised pre-transition me! And I really love my community of queer people I've been building 🥺🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️💕

(Picture taken July 21st, 2023)

Oh yeah!! I also started laser hair removal at the beginning of 2021 as well. Which was before this era but time is a lie. But the new job definitely made it easier to afford.

The biggest step for my transition was getting my surgeries set up!! And my FFS (facial feminization surgery) marks the end of this era. Below was the last picture I took before my FFS.

(Picture taken Feb 17th, 2024)

So, in my next update, I'll be showing my post-op pictures once most of the swelling went down. See you tomorrow!! 😁✌️

Next Part Here

[beatrixstonehill2]

"This is so unfair. I'm a trans girl and got put in this sorority where the only way they're letting me stay on estrogen and be a girl is if I don't be a gooner. They know trans girls are so sweet and perverted that being in a sorority is our fetishistic dream. So many sexy girls to bust a nut to, all of them bi, making out with each other, half of them so pregnant they look ready to pop. Huge boobs, fat asses, all super eager to fuck and party. And I was told by the administration office my stay at the sorority is preliminary, to see if I can behave myself. I was given a list of stuff that will prove I'm secretly just a man trying to invade girls' spaces......

Number one, no jerking off to the girls or trying to cum on them as I go about my day. WTF, the other girls rub their clits for hours on end, in the middle of the lounge and foyer, their mouthwatering pussies out for all to see. They squirt on each other for fun before class! But I can only masturbate if I'm alone? It's so unfair!

Number two, no accidental ejaculation. So no cumming in my panties or down my leg in a cute dress. No cumming in my bikini or my yoga pants. I have to keep my cock under control at all times. Never mind how many girls are fondling themselves all day long as they talk and study and shower, playing with themselves nonstop, groping their tits, their big pregnant bellies, some girls in the halls will even be talking to each other and casually fisting their own asses like it's totally normal. I'm so jealous!

Number three, sapphic fakegirls are just boys. No relationships with girls, period. ....... Never mind that literally every girl here scissors and fuck the other girls for fun. I'm only allowed to take it up the ass at the frathouse to prove I'm a girl.

Number four, no porn. I'm not to watch porn casually, with other people around, in a 'perverted and male way', because I guess girls don't blast porn and watch it in public? Oh wait, every girl does. Porn is on in the lounge 24/7, I just have to walk by and not indulge in watching it. Girls are watching porn on their phones constantly. My roommate watches videos of girls getting gangraped in public for hours every night and cums over and over. The videos sound so amazing! The girls start off complaining about being kissed and groped, to stop pulling out their breasts, how embarrassed they are for their huge tits to be pulled out in public, then the girls usually whine about being pregnant and so many cocks could hurt the babies. But the men never care, they fuck these girls soooo hard for hours in public and nobody does anything, they just watch and film, or masturbate to the carnage. Eventually, the girls wind up moaning and cumming, loving every second of it. I wanna watch these vids so bad it hurts! And my cute pregnant roommate, Stephanie, gets to abuse her pussy over and over and over, absolutely soaking her bed in her pussy juices, but I'd be the perv for doing the same.....

Number five, no grabbing or playing with my cock in the restroom. I have a pretty girl that monitors me in the bathroom every time I go, to make sure I'm not gooning and jerking off. The girls chosen to watch me are so sexy and clearly only there to tempt me into breaking the rules. Only really curvy girls with thick thighs, big asses, huge boobs, and pregnant bellies sticking out so far their arms don't even reach out all the way in front of them. The girls love teasing me, telling me what a pretty girl I am, how beautiful my tits are, how much they want to suck my fat cock. But I can only sit down and pee as they watch, no touching my cock at all.... It's always dripping pee when I get up and I just have to deal with it.

Number six, no filming the other girls in perverted way. No upskirts, no following them filming their asses or tits. Nothing. It's so frustrating because the other girls do this constantly. They'll film upskirts of their friends and upload them to TikTok or Instagram all the time, even grope and pull out their tits like pervy boys.... And that's all in good fun.

Long story short, this university has one of the highest detrans rates for trans girls and I'm sad to say I cracked. It all became too much. I'm gooning soooo hard! I'm filming all these sexy girls, finally, humping the ground, playing with my cock, asking the girls perverted questions like how many babies they're pushed out or whether or not they fantasize about being raped. I can't contain it anymore. I've jerked off like a dozen times today. I'm being transferred to the frathouse..... And as of twenty minutes ago I was given my first shot of testosterone.

Sorry, mom and dad, looks like you're getting back your son. I love how this feels, jerking off in public, groping the other girls, saying lewd, nasty things to them as I stroke my cock. Fuckkkkk I really am a boy, aren't I? This sucks..... I guess playing pretend as a girl really was just a way for me to see more titties, fat asses, swollen pussies, and bellies stretched to the bursting point with babies. I really was just infiltrating, hoping to be one of them and engage in all the wonderful, perverted stuff girls do to each other. Instead I'm going to be just another musclebound creep, forcing myself on pretty girls around campus and bragging about it to all my gooner friends.... My cock is getting hard again just thinking about it.

[midnightechoes]

So this week is going to go down as maybe the most sapphic week in animation history. It’s going to have a great case, there are so many sapphic shows or shows with prominent sapphic couples airing this week.

Don’t know what I’m talking about? Here’s a quick rundown:

Yuri Is My Job!

Premiering on Crunchyroll on April 6th.

Yuri is My Job! is based on a yuri manga of the same name. It follows high schooler Hime, who cares deeply about her image as sweet and helpful, even though she’s actually selfish. She accidentally injures the manager of a cafe, and agrees to work there to make up for it. But this is no ordinary cafe, it’s like a cafe dinner theater where all the waitresses play characters from a fictional high school and act out skits for the patrons. Hime’s character is supposed to be in love with one of the other waitresses’ character, but she starts actually falling for the girl. Only problem is, behind the scenes the other waitress seems to hate her.

Yeah, that sounds kind of bonkers! I can already see the story now, Hime starting out playing a role, and eventually having to legitimately earn the love of Mitsuki.

Birdie Wing: Golf Girls’ Story

Season 2 premiering on Crunchyroll on Friday, April 7th

Ah Birdie Wing. If you saw season one, you know just how delightful wacky this show is. It follows the stories of Eve, a golfer that plays in illegal underground golf matches for the mob, and Aoi, a golf prodigy and the new sensation of the golf world. Their lives crash into each other and the chemistry is overwhelming and immediate.

Technically Eve and Aoi aren’t canon as of the end of s1, but it’s hard to imagine that the show isn’t heading in that direction. It makes no effort to hide the fact that these two are into each other.

I’m so excited to see what season 2 has in store for these two. Birdie Wing is just a delightfully weird little show.

Princess Principal: Crown Handler Chapter 3

Premieres in theaters in Japan on Friday, April 7th

Alright, so this won’t be useful to a lot of people reading this, as this is only premiering in Japan this weekend. But I wanted to mention it because (a) it’ll come over to the US sometime this year, and (b) Princess Principal is awesome and I want to promote it when I can.

Princess Principal was a 12 episode series that aired in 2017, and Crown Handler is a six-part sequel OVA series.

In a nutshell, Princess Principal is a steampunk spy thriller set in an alternate universe European kingdom that has been divided by a wall, Berlin-style. It follows a team of spies, masquerading as high school girls, as they try to prevent the two sides from going to war.

I know, “why is this on a list of gay shit?” Well, because it is. Two of the main characters, Ange and Princess Charlotte, are big-time into each other and while the original series does the anime thing of “we’re only allowed to go so far with this”, the OG series has a lot of intimate scenes between the two and does end *SPOILERS* with the two of them sitting on the beach together while holding hands.

And perhaps Crown Handler, being made years later, can finally take their relationship farther.

RWBY Volume 9

Volume 9 episode 8 airing on Crunchyroll on Saturday, April 8th

RWBY has been ongoing, and the current volume has been airing since February, but there’ll be another episode this Saturday. Right now RWBY is in the middle of dealing with a lot of trauma, BUT, the bees are canon and dating so every episode of RWBY is now officially gay. So says me.

The Owl House: Watching and Dreaming

 Series finale airing on the Disney Channel on Saturday, April 8th

I’M NOT READY TO LOSE THIS SHOW! 😭

*ahem* The third and final season 3 special airs on Saturday, and promises to be mega emotional and super gay.

I’m grateful that this show had a chance to finish its story, something a lot of sapphic media doesn’t get to do. But I am still pissed about it getting cancelled in the first place simply because it didn’t fit their “brand” (read: this show is too gay for Disney).

But I just know that Dana and her team put together a sensational finale.

Mobile Suit Gundam: the Witch From Mercury

Season 2 premiering on Crunchyroll on Sunday, April 9th.

Affectionately called G-Witch, season 1 of this show was a revelation in the fall. It follows the story of Suletta Mercury, precious cinnamon roll and the most talented mobile suit pilot around, and Miorine Rembran, daughter of the president of the Benerit Group, a mega-corporation that has massive political power.

The show revolves around a school that’s mostly full of the children of powerful people. And then there’s Suletta, a nobody that just wants to be a normal girl and have a normal school life but through a series of events ends up in a mobile suit duel that she easily wins, earning her the title of Holder, which makes her Miroine’s groom.

At first, the two treat the arrangement as a business arrangement, both seeing practical value in this arranged engagement. But it’s obvious that Miorine is actually pretty into Suletta from the start, and we see Suletta slowly falling for Miorine too.

G-Witch is incredible. Part awesome mecha fights, part political intrigue, part romance between two useless girls who’d rather die that admit their actual feelings.

I am SO EXCITED for season 2!

LGBTQ media hasn’t had it great as of late, with a ton of frustrating cancellations and it almost feeling like Hollywood is going backwards in terms of its commitment to giving us space to tell our stories.

But animation, both in the US and in Japan, seems to be making great strides, being our light in the dark.

All five of these shows are airing episodes this week, and Crown Handler will be in theaters this week and on streaming/blu-ray later this year. RWBY has been airing for weeks and its been the gayest volume yet. the Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady just finished airing and was wonderfully sapphic. I’m In Love With the Villainess is scheduled to air sometimes this year. And just maybe we might get Arcane season 2 before the end of the year.

I’m excited for how sapphic and yuri animation is progressing, I hope it keeps going forward.

[bri-sonat]

Captain and the Mate - Part One

Pairing: Pirate!Captain!Brienne of Tarth x Fem!Reader

Warnings: mentions of alcohol & blood, brief death mention, sapphic yearning, the usual warnings when writing in the GoT universe.

Synopsis: When the infamous Captain Bri makes port to recruit members to her crew, you don't waste the opportunity. To your relief and pleasure, she accepts you, and the time spent aboard her ship and among her crew leads to many things. One of them being a relationship developing between you and the Captain herself.

A/N: Happy Pride Month!! This has been sitting uncompleted in my word since like, February? March? I am not sure. Either way, a very long time. The fact that I finished this during Pride Month was only coincidental, though I am glad it ended like this because Pirate Captain Brienne is the hottest thing I have ever seen in a long time and I hope you all think the same! The sea shanty referenced is this one, but I have modified it a little bit, of course. Either way, it's good. Listen to it if you wish. :) English is not my first language and so on. Enjoy!

Thank you to bae, wifey, co-brainrotter, sharer of brain cells, and co-writer, @daydream-cement for unknowingly giving me this idea by sending a picture to the GC all those months ago.

The summer evening sun set over Oldtown as you followed the Honeywine down to the nearby inn and tavern. The Hightower's fading shadow informs you of the late hours - confirming that you were right on time for your destination and its event. 

Word had spread fast when she had arrived. Whispers enthusiastically gossiped about why she was here, and what her business was. Eventually, the information reached your spiked ears: she was recruiting members for her crew.  

This was something you had dreamt of ever since you heard about her: sailing with her. Someone who struck fear in people with the same name she was praised with, her actions earning her a nickname traders rued to hear. Her sails and flag striking terror and fright across all nine seas whenever spotted, and rightfully so. 

She had quite a reputation. The pirate Captain who only raided, robbed, pillaged, boarded, and stole from the large, and wealthy trading companies. No one knew why she does what she does, why she only attacks the ships she does, only she knew. It was one of the largest mysteries surrounding her, she was an enigma, and she intrigued, and fascinated you at the same time. 

The glowing braze of the Hightower danced in the Honeywine along with the nearby torches of the various stone houses that stood along the river. Every step you took brought you closer to the tavern, and effectively closer to her, and it was only when the tall and wooden Quill and Tankard Inn came into vision that you realized just how stupid this was. 

What did you think was going to happen? That you’d just be able to waltz straight in, and that she’d accept you to her crew? No, that was wishful thinking. She would have many men on their knees in front of her, begging to sail with her, if they knew what was good for them. To even have an audience with someone with her renown was a privilege, and you were just satisfied with being in her presence. 

Yet, you couldn’t shake the feeling that she might be looking for more than just work power. You had heard whispers that she had lost her Quartermaster and that she was in need of a new one, but this was just hearsay, and gossip, and you decided not to trust any of the two. 

Opening the door to the wooden tavern, you quickly laid notice of the fact that it was quieter than you were used to, surely had to do with the looming presence in the room.  

In the back of it - in front of the hearth and under the slanted roof - an intimidating, short-haired blonde woman sat by a table. A goblet in one hand, the other fiddling with a dagger. Her booted feet were slung up on the wooden surface as she gently rocked on her chair.  

She looked bored, apathetic. The dimly light tavern only cast a shadow over her face, meaning you couldn’t quite see what she looked like from where you stood. 

The tavern was empty, well, emptier than you had expected and you wondered if she had turned any men away because they failed to live up to her standards, or if you were the first one to arrive. Judging from the fuming men who sat in a corner you could see as you approached the bar, you guessed the former. 

“Good evening. Do you want your usual?” The barkeep approached you as you stopped at the bar, her hands wiping themselves on the apron around her waist before they came up to help her lean against the bar top. You and she had formed an interesting friendship after your regular visits, and you had spent many evenings ranting to her about your long-time wish to sail with Captain Bri. 

Unbeknownst to you, the uninterested blonde’s eyes had found you the second your back was turned. She raised her goblet to her lips, taking a sip of the strong cider the tavern was known for. The movement in her other hand never stilled, the dagger constantly moving in her scarred hand. 

The reason for her eyes finding you was unknown to her, maybe it was because you had been the only non-man to come into the tavern that evening, the bartender excluded. Or maybe it was because she found you, a complete stranger to her, intriguing and magnetic, even if it was subconsciously.  

Either way, her gaze was fixed on your back for a few seconds as you interacted with the barkeep, only redirecting her attention somewhere else once one of the men from her crew exclaimed how ‘slim the pickings’ were from beside her. 

“No. I am here to meet the captain. However, now that I am here, it all seems like a most terrible idea.” You gave your answer to the barkeep, voicing your concerns. You were sure the nervosity was easy to hear in your voice when you spoke. The excitement of meeting Captain Bri had completely overshadowed the reality of the situation, but you couldn’t just turn around and leave. You had to at least try. 

“I was wondering when you’d show up,” the barkeep chuckled slightly. “She has yet to accept a single bloke. I’d say your chances are high.” 

“Well... I am here. I might as well go try.” You released a shaky sigh. Realizing you had to at least act somewhat confidently so that Bri would consider recruiting you, you pushed down your anxiousness to the best of your abilities. “She’s the woman at the table. Right?” 

“Mhmm,” the bartender hummed in confirmation. “Go wow her.” She gave you a thumbs up and a smile before she departed to help a customer who was waiting further down the bar. You turned around and approached the intimidating presence by the table with determined steps. 

When you stopped in front of the table, you could, by the help of the glow of the fire behind her, finally see her face. Her face. Many things were told about Bri the Righteous Beast, but none of the stories mentioned her immense beauty.  

She was incredibly handsome, her disheveled blonde hair framing her intense blue eyes as they raked you up and down. And her lips. Good Gods, her lips. The small, accented scar on her upper lip scrunched as she smirked, and you wondered how she had been bestowed such a stunning ‘flaw.’ 

She was a vision, there was no other way to put it and you could spend so many hours just staring at her. There would not be enough time to take in her entirety, but your life would have to suffice. 

Eventually, your gaze wandered to her hands. Her hands. They looked so strong, and her fingers were so long. Small, long, and deep, scars were visible on most of her fingers, her palms, and the backs of her hands, surely from learning to master dagger fidgeting and sword fighting. 

The hand that had previously been playing with a dagger had stopped, and the noise of sharp metal being stabbed into wood ripped you out of your observation. 

“Well. Look here. The Lady here wants to join our crew.” If Bri’s face was attractive, her voice only matched it. It was velvety smooth, so deep and so extremely intruding. Her accent only made it even more delicious, and you were sure you would never get used to it. Even if the captain’s voice and words sounded cocky, there was a mighty insecurity swimming in her eyes and her soul that did not match her outwardly persona. “I’m no knight, but I’m sure pretty ladies such as yourself should be in their castle... not down here with us peasants.” 

The smirk plastered on her face was infuriating, but you couldn’t deny that it was thought-provoking and so, so attractive. Her words didn’t have the effect on you that she might’ve liked them to have, not even the comment on your appearance, as the constant eye contact only reminded you of the self-consciousness inside of her. At the same time as you wanted to tuck your tail and run, you wanted to stand your ground. Show your grit. So, you did. “I’m no Lady. But I’m sure you knew that. You were right about one thing, however. I want to join your crew, Captain. I want to sail under your command.” 

The blonde raised a brow and her smirk fell. She threw her feet off the table to place them on the ground so she could lean forward in her chair. She placed her goblet on the table next to the wood-impaling dagger, her eyes scanning your face imperceptibly. “...Very well. Have you sailed before?” 

“Yes, Captain.” The intense eye contact was burning you up from the inside and you wanted nothing more than to break it - if only just to breathe, but you knew you couldn’t do that if you wanted Bri to believe your words. Because of this, you remained strong. “I was Quartermaster on my last ship before the captain got drunk and sunk it during a supposed boast. I wasn’t present.” 

The captain cocked her head to the side as she watched you, trying to assess whether you were telling the truth. In the years of being a pirate captain, Bri had learnt quite fast how to tell if a person was lying. From what she could tell, you weren’t.  

She was silent for a long while before she finally spoke. “Well, as luck would have it, I need a new Quartermaster. My last one had to be... let go. But I say that we should get you started as a crew member first. Just to see how you work. And to build trust. And gain respect from the rest of the crew. We just met, after all.” Suddenly, the blonde woman stood up from her chair to reach out a hand to shake, and oh, was she tall. At least six feet, you guessed. There was seemingly nothing about this woman that was unattractive. 

Her intimidating height and appearance made it hard to resist staring at her open-mouthed but that would be considered rude, and frankly unprofessional, so you abstained. Even if it was tempting. Instead, you grabbed hold of her incredibly soft, outreached hand and shook it, your eyes never leaving hers, even when you had to change from gazing down at her to up at her.  

The smile she offered was much softer than her previous demeanor had been, and it caught you off-guard. It matched her more than her earlier expression. Matched the emotions that you could see deep in her eyes and soul. 

You could only hope to get to know her on a level that would allow you the pleasure of seeing and meeting the real her. Until then, you’d be the best crewmate she had ever seen. 

“Welcome to the crew.” And just like it never left, the captain’s overconfident behavior had made its return. She let go of your hand and motioned with her head towards the men sitting in a booth diagonally behind her before sitting down in her chair. “Go socialize with the rest of the crew. Get to know them well. You will be spending a lot of time together. Don’t be scared... they don’t bite. But I might.” That cursed smirk again. Why did it have to look so good on her luscious lips? It was plain torture, that much was clear. 

The only thing you could do was nod and go sit down with the crew, the rejected men in the other booth groaning in anger as you did. When it reached your ears, you couldn’t help but feel the tiniest bit smug that you had been chosen and they hadn’t. Maybe this wasn’t the most terrible idea you had built it up to be when you entered the tavern. This had been the best idea it had originally posed itself to be in your mind. 

The men conversed around you, and even if you were sitting amongst them, you wouldn’t say that you were paying attention to anything they were saying. You were more focused on the woman who sat mere meters away from you with her back toward you. With the new point of view, you could observe her without her knowing it.  

Her booted feet had found their way up onto the table again and the dagger was back in her hands. Her trousers were dark, in this light you couldn’t be sure but either a dark grey or dark blue. The shirt she wore was loose on her upper body, it was off-white due to years of wear and slightly unbuttoned at the top which you had registered when you gazed down at her. 

There was a piece of cloth tied around her waist to ensure that her shirt didn’t blow up in the intense ocean winds. It was blue, close to the color of sapphire, but considering the sun was ruthless and had bleached it significantly, it was hard to tell.  

The sword that hung by her hip was broad but seemed light enough to offer one-handed handling. A broadsword if you had to take a guess.  

The rest of the evening was not as eventful as you had hoped. Bri turned away every single person that approached her except for one man.

When the tavern began closing for the night, the captain approached the table you and the rest of the crew were sitting at.

As the hours had gone on, you had grown more comfortable than you thought you would and had even had a cider or two. 

The rugged exteriors of the men did not match their insides and you found them to be quite charming and funny, which was rare for most men in Westeros, but especially for pirates. You could see why Bri had recruited them to her crew. 

Your chatter was cut short when Bri stopped by the table, her eyes roving over all the people who were sitting by it. When her eyes got to you, they lingered for a few seconds longer before they resumed their journey. You noticed this and you wondered if it was intentional or not. When she finished her scan, she spoke with that deep voice that made a shiver run down your spine. “The haul was scarcer than I had expected...” After she had uttered her first few words, she made direct eye contact with you and smirked, again. “But it will have to do. I’m sure our two new recruits will pull their weight.” It seemed like forever before she broke the contact, moving her gaze to the only other recruit. 

The sound of a voice coming from behind Bri made her turn around and the rest of you direct your attention to the person behind the captain. “If you don’t have a room rented, it’s time to leave. We close in five minutes.” The voice came from the barkeep who was holding back the largest smile when she saw you sitting amongst the men. She had her arms crossed over her chest as she addressed Bri and the rest of her crew. 

The captain nodded toward the bartender before turning to face you and the men once again. “It seems like we have reached the end of the line, gentlemen... and gentlewomen. Let us trot back to the ship and our respective beds, shall we?” Bri turned back to the bartender once again to offer words of gratitude. “Thank you for your hospitality.” 

The barkeep in turn responded with a curt nod and a ‘anytime.’ She then stood to the side so Bri and her crew could leave, only giving you the largest grin when you passed her by to leave the tavern. She whispered some encouraging words, well, they were short considering you had to keep moving to not fall behind. 

Bri led you and the crew out into the chill night air, and it was needed because the second you had stood up you had felt the tipsiness from the strong cider. The cool air would help in sobering you up, and if it didn’t, you were sure the salty ocean air would when you departed out to sea the next day. 

The walk along the docked boats in the Honeywine was longer than you had expected it to be, but when you finally reached the ship at the far end, you were more than ready to call it a day.  

The captain stopped right before the docked ship and let the rest of the crew board but stopped you and the other recruit. “This is The Bloody Sapphire. She will be your home for the rest of your life until you die or desert. You better not because if you do desert, I will hunt you down and kill you. If you treat her well and with respect, she will return the favor. Your beds are below deck, make yourselves comfortable. Tomorrow, we make way to Lannisport to resupply. They are not very friendly so put your best innocent face on for our visit. If you need me, my cabin is underneath the quarterdeck, but do not wake me unless there is a fire, we are sinking, someone is attacking us, or if someone is dying. Savvy?” 

You and the man looked at each other before you looked at Bri again and nodded. Both of you responded in unison, making the captain laugh slightly. “Savvy.” 

“Good. Then you may board.” The captain stepped aside to allow you both to step aboard, but before you could step a single foot on the wooden deck, Bri stopped you with a hand hovering in front of your sternum whilst she allowed the other recruit to step aboard and you watched him disappear below deck. 

You looked at her with a puzzled expression as your mind ran through the possible reasons for her stopping you. What could she possibly say that the other guy couldn’t hear? Then again, she had her reasons, and you shouldn’t question her. So, instead of voicing your confusion, you remained silent as you waited for her to speak. 

“I never caught your name. I suppose my mind was distracted and I completely forgot to ask.” Bri dropped the hand that had been hovering in front of your sternum and it came to rest on the pommel of her sword. Her voice was much softer than it had previously been when she had addressed you and your fellow recruit, and you wondered why that was.  

What you didn’t know was that against her better judgement, the captain’s brain had somehow convinced itself that you were a safe space. Even if she had only met you a handful of hours ago. She was drawn towards you. 

When you told her your name, she repeated it and the way it sounded rolling of her tongue with her accent was orgasmic. Never had it sounded so beautiful as it did when spoken by her. In return, she introduced herself to you, not that she needed to, you already knew her name. But you guessed that it was an act of honor. “Bri of Tarth.” 

“The Sapphire Isle? Is that where the name for your ship comes from... and your waist fabric?” Learning where she came from spiked your curiosity, and you asked more questions than you probably should have, considering she enjoyed her privacy. What you weren’t expecting, and that was a pleasant surprise, was that she answered. 

“Indeed. The ship's name is... a long story.” Bri looked down at the fabric around her waist and smiled before she looked back up at you again. “Well spotted. It is indeed sapphire blue... or it used to be, at least. It is from Tarth, I wanted to have something on me that would remind me of my old home. This piece of fabric has been with me since the beginning of my seafarer career. I’m surprised it hasn’t ripped yet.” 

You observed the fabric tied around her waist, excluding dirt stains from years of usage, the occasional blood spatter from seeing many battles, and the bleach from the sun, it looked strong. “I’d say it won’t rip for a while... looks like good material was used. Whatever it was intended for must’ve been important, the fabric looks expensive.” You looked up at Bri again and met her eyes. A flash of what looked like sorrow was briefly displayed in her eyes and you realized that your nice, late-night, alone chat was over. 

Her demeanor changed in the blink of an eye - as if she had mastered switching her expression and behavior. Her tone switched from gentle and tender to overweening, but her eyes never left the previous persona. “Sorry for holding you up. Off you go.” 

You wanted nothing more than to stay, to protest, to say that you wanted nothing more than to stay here all night and converse with her, but your feet worked against the will of your brain and before you knew it you had stepped aboard the ship and was climbing down the stairs that led below deck, leaving Bri standing behind.  

She boarded the ship after a few seconds and retired back to her quarters where she proceeded to think of you until she fell asleep. You fell asleep thinking about her, her intense blue eyes and her blonde hair stayed on your mind until you fell into slumber next to the rest of the crew.  

------ 

The weeks that passed after you were integrated into Captain Bri’s crew went by lightning fast. You and the recruit, who you had learnt was named Will, had worked hard and had earned both the respect of the rest of the crew and your captain.  

After your conversation on the dock, you had managed to get a private chat with the tall blonde five times. The interactions were cut short by various interruptions or her withdrawing from the discussion.

It was like there was some sort of conflict inside of her and she couldn’t decide which side to listen to. It was heartbreaking to watch. 

After a month of sailing with Bri and her crew, you began climbing the ranks. It started with a simple suggestion that ended up working well in everyone’s favor and before you knew it, you had been voted for and promoted to first mate. The new title didn’t do much in terms of giving you more one on one time with the captain, but it was a step towards it.  

After three months of being aboard The Bloody Sapphire, a chaotic boarding made it clear that the ship clearly needed a Quartermaster and the crew voted for you, considering your experience. Bri could not complain because it meant she would be able to see you more often. You were always standing by her side when she was standing by the wheel, after all. 

This new rank did earn you the privilege of having many alone talks with Bri as she steered the ship. Until she, of course, left for her chambers and left you to take over for her. The shortness of the interactions meant you didn’t learn that much about her that you didn’t already know, and it was starting to gnaw.  

That was until you were standing by her side by the wheel on a very sunny fall afternoon and the men started singing. The song was about some scorned woman killing a man who betrayed her and the woman by his side.

It took you until the middle of the shanty to realize that it matched some of the things you knew about Bri. You turned your head to look at her where she stood, her gaze fixed dead ahead. “Is this shanty about you?” 

The captain sighed and the noise of it disappeared into the chilly early Autumn air. She was silent for a few moments until she nodded. “It is. The story went down quite differently, however.” Bri’s gaze never wavered, her eyes never leaving the blue water. “I didn’t sneak aboard a ship for revenge. I snuck aboard a ship because I wanted to get away. The fact that the person who betrayed me was on the ship as well was only a bonus. She just disappeared, and I found out why when I saw her walk with her new lover. I didn’t kill them. Just to make that clear.” 

You listened to Bri’s story but completely stopped breathing once she so casually mentioned that the woman was her former somewhat lover. Even if it caught you completely off-guard, you were able to listen to the rest of her retelling.  

This was the most you had learnt about her in one single conversation, and it made you mightily happy. You so desperately wanted to ask more questions, about why she wanted to get away, who did kill the two lovebirds, but you didn’t want her to escape back to her quarters again. 

Even if you wanted to get to know her even more when the opportunity had presented itself and she seemed to be open to sharing, you would rather enjoy her presence in silence over not being in her proximity at all. Meaning you only said something to let her know that you had listened and acknowledged her sharing but kept your mouth shut to not let anything slip out. “I see.” 

You stood in silence for a while until Bri opened her mouth to say something but was inevitably disrupted by Will who had shown up at the captain’s side in the blink of an eye to explain that they needed to dock somewhere to resupply.

After the blonde woman had dismissed him, she looked over to you and within seconds you had moved to the sea map to lay a new course towards a pirate-friendly port. 

When you returned to the helm, Bri left for her quarters again. Your absence had surely led to her conflicting with herself again and had probably concluded that she had shared too much with you. You had no idea what she did in her quarters all those hours, but you didn’t want to ask because you wanted to offer her privacy. At least there was some progress. 

------ 

Six months after learning that Bri had a shanty written about her, you had been able to snag her for many more chats and each one lasted longer than the one before.  

You learnt more and more about her in every day that passed and even if you didn’t want to admit it, you were so in love with her. You had known it about one month after sailing with her, but now, you were sure. Her looks combined with her gentle and loving personality made it so easy to fall for her. You just had to make sure that you did not hurt yourself on the way down, but it was a bit too late for that. 

You were more than certain that she didn’t feel the same way, even if she behaved so differently around you than she did around the rest of the crew. However, what you didn’t know, was that Bri was very much attracted to and interested in you and all that you were. Having you next to her every day was one of her greatest privileges and she reveled in your proximity. 

Seeing your face every single morning made her happier than any loot ever could, and she quickly found herself stumbling before she eventually fell for you. Yet, she couldn’t see how anyone could ever find her attractive, less love her. So, she didn’t allow herself to hope that you would feel the same about her and subjected herself to a life of yearning. 

It would have remained hidden until the day you both died - if it weren’t for a cold winter evening.  

The Bloody Sapphire had dropped anchor not that far away from Tarth, and the Sapphire Isle was visible from the deck. The ship was cleverly hidden with its sails and flag lowered to avoid a surprise attack should it be stumbled upon. 

You were just about to retire to bed when you spotted Bri standing by the railing, looking out over the ocean in the direction of Tarth.  

Slowly, you approached her and stopped next to her, looking out over the Sapphire Isle yourself. After so many of your conversations and her sharing so much, you felt confident enough to pose a query after you had stood in stillness for a few minutes. “Do you miss it? Tarth, I mean.” 

Bri leaned against the railing of the ship as she stared at the silhouette of Tarth. Her silences before her answers had become commonplace and you had gotten used to them at this point.

As you patiently awaited her response, you shifted your gaze from the darkened Sapphire Isle to the woman standing next to you. You really couldn’t help yourself when she looked so pretty in the glow of the torch.  

The fire cast a shadow over her face - her side profile looked even more angelic in this light, and you could only wish that you would be able to see her this close and like this so many more times in your life.  

When she finally replied, she ripped you out of your appreciation for her features and you began focusing your attention on her voice as well. “Sometimes. Though it’s very rare. The people I have met on my journey and my crew have treated me so much better than anyone on that island ever did. They have never insulted me. Not once. Not even when they learnt that I was a woman. I never wish to go back there. This is my new family.” 

She was so... vulnerable and it made you shocked. Sure, she had shared small things about herself in your talks but never something this deep. You couldn’t let the opportunity go to waste again. “When they learnt you were a woman? May I inquire in what it is that you mean, Captain?” 

Bri gazed at the Isle where she had grown up and eventually left as she told her story. It almost felt ironic in a way. Like it was coming full circle. Speaking about something she had never uttered out loud as she was close to and looking at Tarth. The island where the anecdote began.  

“When I first snuck aboard a ship that docked by Tarth, I told everyone that my name was Bri, and I even darkened my voice so they would believe that I was a man. When they eventually learnt I was a woman, they welcomed me with open arms instead of shunning me and calling me names. It was such a new approach and reaction. I’ve never been so happy.” Towards the end of her story, the blonde was smiling fondly as she thought back to how welcomed she had felt by a band of outlaws when she couldn’t even get the smallest amount of kindness on Tarth. 

Your gaze never left the captain’s pretty face. You could never get used to how beautiful she looked, and you simply could not believe how other people could not find her as attractive as you did. She was the most gorgeous person you had ever laid your eyes on in your entire life. 

Despite your mind coming up with all sorts of scenarios that would surely be deemed inappropriate should someone hear them, you still managed to ask a follow-up question to Bri’s tale without slipping anything that would let the blonde woman know that something completely different was going on in your head. “So... Bri is not your real name?” 

The captain shook her head before she responded. “No. No one knows my real name. The old band I joined and my current crew stated that to them, my old name does not matter. To them, my name is Bri. Though, I have nothing against my real name. I just prefer to have the rest of the world know me as it, so they get confused when they see that I am a woman.” Bri let out a small chuckle at the end of her explanation. Almost like she was thinking back to the different reactions she had gotten from various captain’s ships that she had boarded. “Except you seem to have known that I was not a man from the beginning based on your reaction when you first saw me...” 

“You are a legend... I had to know more about you. There was not a lot to learn about you from the people I managed to find. I only found out about your womanhood through a friend who works somewhere where tight lips go to blab. She also sees many things. Though, finding out that you were a woman only made me want to sail with you even more... I... May I pry?” Even if Bri seemed to be more comfortable with sharing and answering your queries, you knew that she had a habit of removing herself from the discussion when it was too much, and you did not wish to take her openness for granted. She had done nothing but treat you with respect, so you did the obvious thing and returned the favor. You had no interest in upsetting her when she was so exposed. 

“I see... Yes.” Her answer to your question was fast and equally as quick as she had responded, she turned her head to look at you who was intently admiring her. With her now facing you, you could see her breathtaking blue eyes that sparkled so bewitchingly in the light from the torch just meters away from you both. 

“What is your real name?” The inquiry was a whisper as your eyes scanned her face for any sign of the overweening personality you had gotten used to usually signaling the end of your conversations. It never came. The gentle and careful personality remained. The personality you assumed was the real her. 

Bri opened her mouth to answer your query but stopped when a noise sounded from below deck signaling that one of the crewmates was still awake. The captain turned her head to look at the hatch leading down and waited for someone to pop their head up, but that never happened.  

Even if it was still quiet below deck, she couldn’t risk someone eavesdropping on the conversation considering her behavior was completely opposite from how she usually acted. Before she spoke, she turned her head back to look at you. “We shouldn’t do this here. Join me in my quarters?” 

The question caught you by surprise. Never had you been inside of her quarters before and it was something you could never have dreamt of and now she was extending an invitation. At first, you were unsure if you had heard her correctly but as she looked at you expectantly, you knew you had heard her right. 

You almost screamed your answer, ‘Gods, yes please!’ but that might be seen as a little bit too enthusiastic and would surely weird Bri out. What came out was more composed and calmer - not a single trace of the previous excitement. You were surprised that your voice came out without a single shake, tremor, or stutter considering the storm that was going on inside of your head. “Sure, Captain. If you’d have me.” 

Your answer made Bri smile the smallest bit. She found it endearing. She found you endearing. She spun on her heels and started for the door that led to her cabin, and you followed close behind. 

------

Part two can be found here!

taglist: @na-shoba, @pastanest, @the-fuck-do-i-know, @christies-fleur, @idontlikepexple, @lord6-6fandom, @sapphicmitski

[fawnduu]

I just wanted you to know that Olive is what finally made trans people click for me so I could eventually realize that I myself am transfem

im sorry i let this sit in the inbox! I never feel like a can craft a response to show how happy this makes me. I started making comics because when I came out i started mass consuming sapphic comics/media and wished it had been easier to do this because I probably would have come out a lot sooner. It is a honor and pleasure to have been the sapphic comic that made it all click for you <3.

[smolsassygay]

Hi, this is me, new to the Black Sails fandom but also completely insane about this show which is surely one of my favorite ones now. Like wow. It got me in such a way I can't put in words ;;

That said, I'm on season 3. Episode 7. And uh... I'm about to babble about the sapphics! So feel free to skip this infodump but! (Also, sidenote I watched half the episode because I had to sleep so Idk if they have more convos up till it ends)

I am thinking SO HARD about the convo Max had with Eleanor, about the weight of sitting on that chair and how she couldn't forgive her back when *gestures*, but now she is her and she understands the choices she had to make. How being in power like that means you will eventually destroy the people you love the most. And like, the parallel is so... Because Eleanor clearly loved Max back, but Max was more innocent in a way, she didn't put other things above her love, while Eleanor did. And now... Well, I'd say Anne is also kind of innocent in this way. She didn't wanna leave Max, she wanted to find a way for them to be together, it was Max who broke things off between them. And all of that clearly hurts Max so badly! It never feels as if she's being painted as a villain, every attitude she has to take that goes against her feelings for Anne are follow by PHENOMENAL acting from JPK. It's the way her eyes are just slightly teared, it's the way she frowns lightly. She acts SO MUCH with her eyes and it makes me so amazed, even as an actress myself. Like holy shit, girl. But back to Max. She once said "never let anyone stand in between you and your ambitions" and she is clearly following that lesson but how much does said lesson hurt her? How much does it take little pieces of her? How can you have love when you're in a position such as hers? Whiich... Is another parallel to Eleanor. Not only in Season 1 with Max herself, not only with Vane, but... Even rn with Woodes. Max gave her a whole warning about this. But how can any of these characters deny themselves love? Even if it's tainted, even if it costs something, even if it's ephemeral. (I really like how love is presented in Black Sails and perhaps I should make a post about that sometime.) Anyway, this was a lot of rambling but this show makes me insane and the girls specifically... Man. Just. MAN!! Some of the best female characters I've ever seen written in my life. And all of my faves are sapphics. It feels like winning the lottery.

[delusionsofspace]

Hi I'm unwell. Another long post probably, thank you @es46 for giving me an idea !! click readmore for accidental aroace rants plus some silly shenanigans (the aroace rants happened on accident my bad)

So I one million percent agree that Ingo and Emmet would probably clock Elesas crush right away, even if they are aroace themselves, they see Elesa as a sister basically and know how she is (useless lesbian (she is bisexual w/ a woman leaning preference)) I definitely think of them as a trio who grew up together so they probably watched her go through her awkward teen years getting crushes on every pretty woman who was nice to her, but Skyla is a different situation obviously so they mutually agree to come at it from a different angle this time, much to Elesas dismay

I think Emmet would be super direct about it but think he's being slick because he isn't SAYING what he really means, right? But saying "I am asking for no reason in particular if you are single and also into women :>" and then dropping a "thank you for answering my random question that has no ulterior motive!" and Skyla would be like . Uh huh. Okay . (I don't know her personality SUPER well but I know she and the twins have slight beef over the more superior form of transportation planes v trains)

Emmet would also definitely try to be a "just go for it why are you so scared??" kinda guy because his concept of romance is heavily based on how he's seen it in media, but he hates watching it so it's really only the stuff he can't avoid? So hes like "obviously most relationship drama comes from not confessing so just get that part over with before it causes an issue" and doesn't ENTIRELY understand the nuance of being scared of rejection even if the other person seems interested (as well as adding on the sapphic problem of "is she flirting or just Really Friendly?")

I think Ingo is a little (lot) more empathetic than Emmet, not on purpose I just think Emmet genuinely lacks empathy and forgets to make up for it with sympathy at times, Elesa doesn't take it personally, but Ingo is absolutely a little more in tune to a social situation being stressful

Ingo, though, is also painfully aroace and his concept of love and romance is less whst you see in (straight) media and moreso in how he's defined it personally as somebody whose never felt it . He imagines it feels different from how he cares about Elesa, but she has to explain it's not that easy to really differentiate, because to love somebody you also usually love them a lot platonically as well as romantically. And that would absolutely perplex him just a smidge, because he sees love as this unreachable thing for him that's so distinct from everything else when it's really not. People just hype it up so much because of how it feels in the moment, but in reality it's actually rather difficult to define and Ingo thrives off precise definition.

He would encourage her to go for it, maybe a bit too obviously at times (no Ingo, deciding to loudly exclaim that you and your brother have somewhere to be, conveniently leaving Elesa alone with Skyla is not slick as you think it is!)

Ingo and Emmet would also absolutely try to set aside whatever feelings they have on Skyla and fully support Elesa in her relationship until the 4 actually managed to start getting along naturally, which happens eventually, it just takes time because the twins are very stubborn

It would absolutely lead to scenarios though where the twins are just a bit too pushy out of love and Elesa would probably have to tell them to back off, because romance is finicky and you have to let it happen naturally or else things get janky. I don't think they would fully get it until put into a train metaphor though

"If you try and run a train before the tracks fully built, or the engine is installed properly, even if it goes somewhere for a little while it likely won't reach it's destination" and they both go ohhhh.

Honestly I think that metaphor Ingo would come up with on the spot in an attempt to relate or process what Elesa is trying to explain, and then once they hear it everything clicks much better and they back off from trying to "speed things up", though in true assholeish brother-y nature, they have to bully her juuuust a little bit (Emmet going "WOW ELESA your face sure is red, is it too hot in here? Maybe you and Skyla should step outside for some fresh air :>" and Elesa making a strangling motion with her hands while Ingo is fighting off a laugh.

I do think that it would earn some laughs once Skyla and Elesa are actually together, and Skyla would probably have to drop the fact that she was painfully aware of the brothers attempts to push them together, much to Elesas horror

[fairytale-poll]

QUARTERFINAL ROUND, MATCH 3 OUT OF 4! FINALS FOR SET C!

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Skylla:

sapphic little mermaid with a happy ending. what's not to love. pretty art too (it's a graphic novel/webcomic, can be found for free online (legally)). she's sweet, she speaks sign language, she's brave.

Skylla is a mermaid who falls in love with a human. Since her language just sounds like screeching to humans she is taught sign language by Corinth, the girl she falls in love with. Eventually she decides she wants to go to the surface so she can be with Corinth. She loves hamburgers and also has a feisty streak. Corinth also has a shitty boyfriend that, as a condition of becoming human, she has to kill with a knife given to her by her sisters. She ends up not killing him because Corinth ask her to, but they end up being able to be together when Skylla asks her father to turn her into a mermaid because she was near death.First of all, sign language. Second of all, wlw. Third of all, slow burn.

Bug:

Their a bug that falls in love with a human they rescue and becomes human, but even when they don't get to keep their human body, they still get to be with their love. It's a sci-fi fairytale musical.

Little Mermaid meets Starship Troopers musical starring awesome puppets and the most trans coded main character ever. Please. Please vote Bug Starship I love him. Go watch Kick it Up a Notch from Starship. Go watch Status Quo from Starship. You will understand.

He's a bug and he lives in space on a bug planet but he really wants to be a starship ranger which you can only be if you are a human and then one day a spaceship lands on his planet and so he goes to an evil bug called Pincer who then helps him become a human. And Bug falls in love with a human on the spaceship and it's very sweet. The musical and storyline are based on the little mermaid story, the creators themselves called it "the little mermaid but in space". Bug wanting to be a human/a starship ranger and achieving that and falling in love with a human is very much like the little mermaid

Starship is a musical that can only be described as The Little Mermaid meets Starship Troopers. It follows Bug, an alien bug who dreams of being a Starship Ranger, a galactic explorer/soldier, but the rigid confines of bug society keeps him trapped in a job he hates. He reaches a Starship Ranger named February from the hive and immediately falls in love with her. In order to be with her and pursue his dream, he makes a deal with a giant scorpion named Pincer who through sci-fi bs gives him a human body. Near the end of the second act he sacrifices his human body and returns to his bug body, and saves the day and wins February's heart. It's truly the ultimate Little Mermaid. He has multiple songs, and his bug body is portrayed by a puppet!! Vote for Bug!!

“It's a big, big, universe So many dimensions And unanswered questions Not to mention Life What an invention Life There's no choice involved in what you are given One mind, one voice, one body to live in It's a short, small thing we lead With so much potential Pointless or essential Which one can I be? Where do I fit? Where do I stand? Who are they to say what I am? And how can I stay inside this awful world I know? I need a way out I need an escape I'd rather be dead than to live in this place I wish that something or someone could just take it all away Someone take me away” dear god….. can anybody hear me…. (song from starship)

They are the purest little mermaid adaptation done in the most unuque way. An alien insect gets turned into a human, a race he has always loved and admired, to be with the woman he fell in love with. Also just a great musical.

Bug's whole arc is so so in tune with that of the little mermaid. He is an alien who has fallen in love with humanity through a crashed spaceship and trades his place in the hive for a chance to be with both with the human he's falling for and to be a Starship Ranger. He body swaps with human in a cryogenic pod! It's literally sci-fi Little Mermaid!

[shelaghdette]

theory: trixie franklin is a lesbian

alright, this one may prove slightly controversial, but please bear with me! i've always taken the view that trixie is bi, but thinking about it more, i've come to a different conclusion.

glossary -

wlw - woman loving women, a blanket term for any woman who is attracted to women.

sapphic - another blanket term for femmes who are attracted to femmes, arguably more inclusive than wlw - here used interchangeably with the above.

lesbian - a woman or femme who is exclusively attracted to other women or femmes.

bisexual - a person who is attracted to two or more genders.

a note on compulsory heterosexuality -

before you read this, if you don't already, it's probably best to understand the concept of compulsory heterosexuality, or comphet.

this is when societies (like most in the world, even in the modern day) enforce the normalisation of heterosexual love and relationships, to the point that lgbt people feel pushed towards straight-passing relationships when they may be happier in a queer relationship.

comphet applies to all genders and queer sexualities, but today i'm going to be discussing it specifically in the context that it impacts lesbian women.

relationships with women -

full disclosure - i am a trixadette shipper (i think i might've even invented the ship). i have analysed quite a number of scenes from the first two seasons where trixie and sister bernadette interact, and there doesn't appear to be much in the way of heterosexual explanation for their behaviour towards each other. that in itself deserves its own post, and will get one in due course.

my theory that trixie is attracted to women mostly stems from her interactions with sister bernadette, and later shelagh. there are a few longing looks, some flirtatious body language and just a general air of gals who are a bit more than pals.

however, aside from this, trixie never appears happier than when she interacts with other women. she seems to gain the most fulfilment from her relationships with her female friends, far more than she does with the men in her life. barbara and valerie are prime examples of this.

prior to realisation of being sapphic, it's very common for wlw to experience intense attachment and deep love for female friends. this can truly be just platonic, or it can be a crush that is so repressed that it presents as overwhelming platonic love.

"attraction" to men -

ever since the first season, trixie has been presented as the "boy crazy" girl. she often talks about men, but if you actually watch her behaviour, she rarely pursues any particular man. additionally, closeted queer people may often overcompensate for their insecure identities by putting forward a highly straight image.

it's extremely common for lesbians who are experiencing comphet to fantasise about an abstract concept of a relationship with a man, but not have much idea of WHO that man might be. in the early seasons, when she DOES pursue a man, it is with an ulterior motive (getting that actor to be a judge for the baby show) and it ends disastrously for her.

when she does eventually get into relationships with men, it is because they pursue her. it happened with all three of her relationships we've seen on the show - tom, christopher and matthew. i do not personally think trixie showed any interest in them prior to them showing interest in her, but YMMV.

image consciousness

it's very telling that, during her AA meetings, trixie speaks at length about her ability to put on a show to please others around her. obviously, she talks about this in the context of placating her mentally ill and alcoholic father, but this skill from childhood has been highly transferable to her adult life too.

trixie is extremely good at putting on a front and looking well put together, even during her worst moments. when she was relapsing, she hid it well until her secret was unwittingly revealed to phyllis by a patient. the girl can lie and lie, but it's all a defense mechanism.

trixie clearly struggles with a view that she must be seen as perfect at all times. it's easy to see how, if she was a lesbian, this would not fit into the image she tries to display to others. i believe that part of her striving for perfection includes wanting a relationship with a man. this leads me into my next point.

cultural context

it probably goes without saying, but the 1960s was not an easy time to be a sapphic woman, especially if you weren't attracted to men. we just need to look at the story of patsy and delia to see how the show acknowledges this. comphet is still a problem we face today, in the year of our lord 2024, but it was absolutely rampant in those days. female lgbt behaviour was never criminalised like male homosexual acts, but it was harshly viewed. wlw faced a lot of the same challenges as mlm, as well as their own unique struggles when homophobia is coupled with misogyny.

marriage to a man and child-bearing were still considered the most important things a woman could do in that era. and by the time trixie gets into a relationship with matthew, she is approaching her mid-30s. in that time, trixie would have already been considered "on the shelf." the show really implies this by her becoming a lot more focused on her search for a husband in later series, like when she joins the marriage bureau.

relationships with men

i won't say much about tom, but trixie makes no bones about it when she told him he and barbara are much better suited. there's a real notion that trixie feels out of place in her relationship with tom, and ultimately she breaks it off when she realises she couldn't be happy with him in the long term.

this continues into her relationship with christopher. i really like christopher, and i think trixie does too. by far, he is the person who treats her the nicest out of the three men she has had major relationships with. however, even then, she doesn't seem entirely comfortable, and breaks it off when she fears how intimate the relationship has become. i think the situation with alexandra is mostly an excuse for her fear of commitment to a man.

i also want to talk about sex (minors, cover your ears) when i mention christopher. he's the first man she is ever implied to have slept with, and she agonised over it for a very long time before she makes the decision to do it. some people read this as her being asexual (which she still could be, even as a lesbian!), or just "proper" for the era, but opinions vary. i view it as her having no sexual attraction to MEN.

finally, matthew. oh, matthew. he makes me so very angry.

matthew and trixie essentially traumabonded over the death of his first wife, and she is a good supportive presence to him raising his son in her capacity as a midwife. i think the convenience of him showing interest in her, coupled with her recent anxiety about find a partner, created the situation where they eventually married.

and she still isn't happy. when the new pupil midwives arrive and trixie hears them having fun with nancy, she looks really sad and lost, and my heart just breaks for her. it's a sign that she regrets leaving the lifestyle she loves for a life of domestic "bliss".

when they had their argument about trixie's work, it's very telling that her immediate response was to retreat back to her safe place of nonnatus house for half the week. trixie feels the most secure when she is among women, this is shown time and time again.

this was super long winded and possibly a ramble, but these are my thoughts on her. if you made it to the end, here's my favourite happy video edit of trixie and shelagh. i'll probably make a whole post about why i ship them next.

[chloessapphicapothecary]

Ok, first off, I’d like to thank EVERYONE who showed their support for my first attempt at just showing my sapphic ramblings to the world. You are all amazing, and incredible, and just… means the world to me. 2024 has been a trying year, but also given me a lot of happy-firsts. :)

So, regardless, thank you for spending a few seconds reading my mini-obsessions. It means literally the world to me. (Both Earth AND Krypton. 💜☀️)

Oh, and while I’m here…. Maybe I could dust off another snippet. Now, for context, the two aren’t necessarily connected, they were both written for two separate issues *MY* ‘Cat’ has had in years past, each sparked inspiration.

That being said, this one would prolly take place before the first one, and yes, you’ll notice some similar beats to the first one… suppose I know my own tropes well… so, apologies if they are a bit too heavy-handed… but I am who I am. Lolz

Also? This one…. Might have a rumbling of a part 2, which would lead to the event teased near the end.

Regardless, enjoy! 🧡🤍🩷

“You Don’t Get to Talk to Her That Way…”

Kara knew better than to listen in, especially to this particular conversation, but between her sense of morbid curiosity, and overall feeling that she should know about this conversation too, Kara tuned her super-hearing to pick up the conversation happening inside Cat’s office, between her and her mother.

“Kitty, darling, how are you?” Katherine asked in her usual, high-brow way, even if the intent of the words was to be more of a knife in the back.

“Mother, what do you want?” The younger Grant asked, hand already massaging her left temple as she held her phone to her ear with her right, she could already feel the headache coming on.

“Wow, that harsh even for you, Kitty.” Katherine all but tisked, that tone making Cat’s blood boil internally as she tried to keep her cool, but given what she assumed this conversation was about, she was already on edge.

“Mother, what do you want??” She repeated, her words more pointed and venomous as her heart rate began to accelerate, giving Kara even more reason for pause, even if she managed to keep the appearance she was deep into researching something for the board meeting later that day for Cat.

“Fine, we’ll dispense with the pleasantries…” Katherine replied before sighing in what Cat knew was mock annoyance. A way to glamourize her plight in the phone with her “ungrateful” spawn. “I called because I saw the article in the Planet about you and…. Her.”

The ending of the sentence was steeped in moderate disdain, as if she was calling to tell a drunken frat boy to send his evening booty call home so she could get some sleep. That fact alone sent Cat right to the edge of her limits…. It was going to be touch-and-go from here on out, enough so even Kara stopped to look and see what Cat’s face looked like.

“Of course you read it in the Daily Planet…” Cat groused, rolling her eyes in irritation. “Would it kill you to buy a newspaper that I own?”

“The Planet’s record is unmatched, Kitty, don��t get your panties in a bunch.” Her mother admonished.

“I’m not…” Cat grit her teeth. “I just hoped eventually you’d take pride in something your daughter made..” she added with a very heavy passive-aggressive edge.

“Oh don’t be silly, Kitty…”

“My name is Cat.” She cut her mother off, her words tumbling out with almost the full venom that Cat usually reserved for indignant men of all privilege-types. “And her name is Kara.”

“I know who she is, Kit… Cat.” Katherine replied, begrudgingly changing course mid-way to say what her daughter wanted to hear. “But honestly? Just have a weekend fling to clear your head then get back to…”

“No.” Cat interjected again, her tone firm but reserved, which stood in stark-contrast to the red-faced woman clutching her phone tight enough to lose circulation, not to mention how her heart was jackhammering inside her chest.

That was when Kara gave up any other pretenses and excused herself to enter Cat’s office, waving plaintively, which gave Cat all the signal she needed to know Kara was not entering the room by cruel happenstance.

“You don’t get to talk about her that way, mother.” Cat jabbed back, not even hiding her contempt. “Call back when you can learn at least a modicum of human decency.”

Cat slammed the phone down on the cradle, and immediately cradled her head in her hands, leaving Kara a bit surprised. Their relationship had just finally hit the public scene a week ago, after an all-too-brief 6-months of time to just, be… together. Cat had dreaded this call every single day since the word dropped, from an article published by Cat herself, wanting to get out ahead of it before someone scooped it and made it into something much more nefarious than it ever was or could be. So in a way she was almost glad the call happened, up until she compared Kara to some… drunken frat boy she needed to fuck and get over by Monday.

“Hey… so… I assume that didn’t go well.” Kara finally piped up, her discomfort a bit noticeable, but she kept most of it under-wraps. Who knew the Girl of Steel had, or needed, such obscure powers, Cat silently mused to herself, as she could see enough to know her feelings, but not enough to know them all.

“How much of it did you happen to hear?” Cat replied without even thinking, her demeanor shifting nebulously as she tried to calm herself down from the mood that had her slamming the phone down hard enough to make her own body wince.

Kara pursed her lips, and momentarily weighed her options, but the Queen of All Media, interviewer of despots and douchebags, and the occasional not-deplorable, saw all she needed to see.

“So, all of it.” She groaned, before looking up from her forlorn position to make eye-contact. “I’m sorry, Kara.” She spoke succinctly and heartfeltly, her dalliances in ‘Keira’ all but evaporating once she had no reason to have the misspoken name as a way to keep herself in control of the woman she mocked as “Sunny” Keira Danvers, insufferably goody-goody Girl Scout. She had already eaten all the crow she deserved and more for that jab, and was even pleasantly surprised when Kara actually liked the moniker of “Sunny”. So, who was Cat to argue with the woman she was somehow always enamored with? Even when she was too afraid to own her own feelings?

“Ms. Grant, it’s ok… it’s just…” Kara began to assuage her paramour, as she always did.

“No, Kara, it’s not!” She insisted, her eyes filling with rage, rage that Kara knew better than to assume was aimed at her. “She does not get to talk about you that way… like you’re just… some silly fling I’ll get over by Monday.”

“Ok…” Kara replied, a bit taken aback. She wasn’t totally unaware of Cat being like this… but to have it be about her was certainly something she was still getting used to.

“I mean it, she doesn’t get to disparage someone as good as you, I won’t allow it. She had no right to assume you’re just some… floozy who I’m only interested in because she’s good in bed… not to say you aren’t, but you know what I mean, yes?” Cat added, her vamping was another new development, something that Kara was both surprised by, and totally enamored with. She knew Cat was head-to-toe a strong, confident woman… but to see these moment of insecurity, of vulnerability, it just managed to show Kara there was ways she could love her even more.

“It’s ok, Ms. Grant, I get it…” Kara assuaged her lover, walking behind the desk to get the distance of the desk from between them.

“So, how long til you think she calls back?” Kara asked, when of course, because pitch-perfect irony, the phone rang. Both women winced at the blaring tone, but Kara, being Kara, picked it up without skipping a beat.

“Cat Grant’s office, this is Kara, how may I help you?” She asked with perfect customer-service tone, even as her face was riddled with all the visual hallmarks of annoyance and disdain.

“Oh, it’s you…” Katherine replied, her own disgust much more telegraphed in her voice.

“It sure is, did you need something, Mrs. Grant?” Kara asked, sure to make sure her voice was so sweet and saccharine that Katherine could squirm on her end of the phone.

“Just to speak to my daughter. Post haste.” Katherine annoyedly added, as if irritated that she needed to even voice the request.

Kara looked at Cat to gage if she even wanted to be talked to. After a few moments of silent contemplation, Cat sighed and picked up her head to give her a free hand to take the phone.

“Alright, here she is… have a good day, Mrs. Grant..” Kara added, biting her tongue before she said something a bit too far for the snark and smarm of the present moment.

“Yes, Mother? Called to apologize for calling my GIRLFRIEND a weekend-only floozy?” Cat shot back, not losing a bit of her edge from the previous conversation.

“Kitty, honestly, do you expect me to go through this whole charade?” Katherine asked bluntly, her tone devoid of empathy.

“You’ll never know what I expected out of you, mother, and that’s your loss. Just like… you know what, no… Mother, new deal..” Cat replied, as the wheels were turning in her head.

“Against my better judgment, I will forget all about this… abhorrent waste of my time if you’ll agree to one thing.” Cat began to lay her case, like a prosecutor leading the witness to the exact spot she wanted them.

Katherine sighed, making little effort to hide it from her daughter’s ears. “And what exactly is this ‘one thing’ you expect of me?”

“Dinner. You, me, Kara, and Carter.” Cat explained. “I’m sure your grandson would love to see you, and… you may as well get to know the woman I intend to spend the rest of my life with.” Cat said boldly, the words even making Kara react with visible shock, followed by a comforting warmth that could’ve made her float off the ground, if she wasn’t careful.

“Fine, fine, I’ll be in town…” Katherine began to tell her daughter of her future plans, but once again Cat was not wanting to be regaled by whatever vapid, vain reason her mother had to be in town, no-doubt a Nobel Laureate or Mega-Star author to which Catherine Jane Grant ‘couldn’t compare’ to.

“Oh, you don’t have to settle this with me, I’ll have Kara call you back to schedule it. Bye mother.” Cat roared, before once again slamming her phone down.

“So, I take it you’d like me to…” Kara began to ask as she noted it on her tablet, before looking up to see Cat’s head back in her hands.

“Cat, what’s wrong?” Kara asked, resting the tablet on Cat’s desk before closing the minuscule distance, resting a hand on Cat’s hunched-over shoulder.

“It’s nothing, I’m fine… I’m fine.” Cat tried to beg off, but somehow that reaction, which had become her staple reaction to any form of disappointment, just felt… wrong. Luckily, she wasn’t the only one who had the same overall thought.

“Cat, no… please don’t shut me out.” Kara meekly-pleaded in a moderate whisper, as she stopped down to look her in the eyes, only to see they were reddened and misted with tears. “El mayarah, remember?” Kara added, reaching a hand over to try to crook Cat’s face towards hers with a push on her magnificent jawline.

“Oh, Kara… you don’t need to get dragged into my mother’s delusions, especially when she thinks…”

“Cat, stronger TOGETHER. You don’t have to do any of this alone. Not anymore.” Kara all-but-pleaded, dropping her hand to squeeze Cat’s lovingly. “And, with all the honesty and respect I can manage, I don’t give a fuck what your mom thinks about me.”

Cat visibly guffawed. She was honestly not sure what to think. The confidence was startling, but the expletive was honestly shocking.

“Language!” Cat tried to fire back, her ability to keep a straight face faltering as Kara showed her own flustered reaction to Cat’s reaction.

“Hey, it got you to smile… so it was worth it.” Kara smiled, reaching over to wipe a tear from Cat’s face. “So, Cat… if I can use the question you so eloquently taught me back at you… what is the ‘anger behind the anger’ here? The tabloids have called me much worse than that..”

“Because those tabloids were written by my…. Mother.” Cat’s face went white as she realized it. It was something she knew all too well, and thought she had grown past, yet here it was, threatening to make her come unglued as she sat there.

Kara kept quiet, and just continued to crouch there, rubbing small circles on the top of Cat’s hands as her eyes stayed trained to the teary-eyed woman.

“I… no, it’s silly…” Cat tried again to retreat, but Kara gently squeezed her hand and kept her eyes trained on her. *Dick move, Supergirl..* Cat mused to herself, only because she knew that she had no defense to those kind eyes that made everything better.

“Fine.” Cat relented, letting out a deep sigh. “My issue is the same silly, stupid one I’ve had my whole life. It’s what has basically propelled me to get here,” Cat added, motioning to her desk, the room, and to a greater extent the entire building.

“I’m just a silly, stupid, weak girl who just wants her mommy to love her for who she is..” Cat just bluntly replied, before she sunk her head back onto her free hand, and use every ounce of her energy to hold back the next round of sobs.

“Cat, you are literally none of those words… not even close.” Kara began her reply, choking back feelings of her own. “And it’s perfectly normal to want that, believe me, I have experience on 2 planets, with 2 very different mothers.”

Cat just looked over at her, eyes red with hopelessness, and just stared. As if silently asking her to continue.

“You’re not weak for wanting a mother’s love. What child wouldn’t want to know that the people who made them, love them?” Kara added.

“You have a point.” Cat quietly replied.

“Oh, Cat, as the smartest woman I know always tells me, I always have a point..” she quipped back, smirk on her lips as she watched Cat realize it and get her own matching grin.

“I’m so sorry your mother can’t love you the way you deserve, Cat, but… I can try my best to fill in the gaps.” Kara offered plaintively.

Cat’s flusterment was palpable. “Kara, darling, you can’t replace my mother’s love for me… because you already show me love, and grace, to a level she could never wrap her head around.”

“Well, yeah, you’re the woman I love… what else am I supposed to do?” Kara asked, as if confused about how someone couldn’t love Cat the way she did.

“You see, darling, that’s what makes you different than her. You don’t see caring as a chore… sadly, my own mother can’t see past herself to see what you see, her loss.” Cat regained her composure, just enough to go back to matters at hand at work.

“Thank you, Kara… I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Cat admitted, her dalliances in vulnerability something that just made Kara’s heart ache more for her beloved.

(To Be Continued…?)

El Mayarah,

Chlo. 💜☀️

[bengiyo]

La Pluie: Thoughts on the Queer Subtext and More Patts Reflections

It feels a bit weird to begin this post talking about the queer subtext in a show full of men kissing each other, and implied sapphic love. Still, I have thoughts about Warun and Yad, and how their relationship represents a break with traditionalism as well. There are many articles and historical analyses about the “surge” in divorce in America once it became legal for women, and especially for women to have their own bank accounts. I personally don’t think traditions are useful at the point where they continue to harm people asked to uphold them. Yad and Warun also seem to be reconciling that reality for themselves.

Warun and Yad

I posited in Episode 5 that Warun might be queer based on my read of his mannerisms. I think that read holds even through Episode 11, but I think it’s good for the show not to confirm his queerness in any way. Because this show has not had any form of overt homophobia, it would confuse any of the previous messaging to make his queerness text. However, his line, “I can’t change myself,” reads so loudly as queer to me that I can’t let it go.

With Yad and Warun, we had two people come together and form a soulmate marriage and successfully raise four children together. However, they ran into the kinds of problems many couples do, principally over work and family time. What fascinates me is that Yad is the primary breadwinner for their family. She is becoming a powerful tech executive and doesn’t want to forego her career because of the goals she has for her family. Is she not supposed to provide the best financial outcomes for her children?

Warun has become the primary caregiver, and he worries that the boys are not getting the connection with their mom that both she and they need. As I watched their fight, I thought about Nagisa in his (2020) and his fight with his wife, who was also the primary breadwinner of their couple as well. Eventually, they realized they couldn’t be the partners they wanted to be to each other and separated. I think, because Warun was the caregiver, he didn’t want to feel like he let his boys down and ended up giving Tai a huge complex.

I think it’s extremely lovely of this show to show that Warun and Yad were better once they separated from each other and let go of the idea that they’re supposed to be married forever because of their rain connection. (@liyazaki) I love that they still find meaning and connection in their rain connection and hold it significantly between them. I love that Nu is completely unbothered by their connection, and only wants to find his place in this family.

Tai

Oh, Tai. This was not a great week for him. Despite showing some wisdom with Lomfon, and reconciling with his brother, he continues to hold onto this false notion of love.

I will say this plainly. I think Tai has been an asshole for the last two episodes, and it was time for the narrative to gently, but firmly, pull his head out of his ass. He has punished everyone in his life because he’s mad at his parents, refusing to form any meaningful relationships with many people because he’s not allowing himself the complexities of human connection.

I am glad that he was forced to confront the chip he carries around on his shoulder and recognize that his parents faced a terrible internal struggle. He needed to see that it was unfair of him to punish them for dealing with something that difficult. I also think it’s useful for him, with all of the mess he’s created, to have the support of his closest brother.

Now, he’s got to make things right with Patts, but he doesn’t have the benefits of the rain connection to find him. I’m eager to see that boy run around and do the goddamn work required to be in a long-term relationship with someone next week.

Tai is learning the hardest lesson we learn as queer people: the rules and traditional expectations of relationships don’t fit for us. We have to figure out our relationships ourselves and do the work.

Patts

You know I was going to defend my boy!

I think it was excellent of the show to have Patts go to Tai and see him being chummy with Longfon. Though I think Patts’s friends were wrong about him needing to go reconcile with Saengtai, Patts isn’t the kind of person to just let his problems fester. It’s not in his nature. He must go to him. He has to see Tai talking to Lomfon and misunderstanding it so that he makes the only reasonable choice and attempt to move on. I love Patts. He will always try to do the right thing even if it hurts.

My man ugly cried next to a window as his friends held him because he’s done everything he possibly could and it still wasn’t enough. He asked last week and I’m still asking, “Why is it so hard to choose me?”

Reading Patts as bisexual, I like the choice for him to walk away at this point because it’s exactly what he told Saengtai. Tai said he wanted Patts to see his actions over any words he won’t speak. I don’t care that Tai was clearly trying to fix things for Tien. If he was going to fix any relationships, he needed to go to Patts first.

On to the Finale!

I may be limited in my commentary next week since I’ll be busy, but I am genuinely excited about this finale. Tai is finally being forced to grow up and stop waiting for love to fall into his lap. I’m ready to see that boy Japanese BL Run for his love.

Tagging @lurkingshan, @neuroticbookworm, and @wen-kexing-apologist for chatting with me while I got these thoughts out.

[marzipanandminutiae]

I see you talking about ouat and it unlocked thoughts that have been neatly filed away for years so here I am, yelling them at you.

I assume at this point spoilers arent a problem anymore for you but you said you originally didn't watch past the frozen but a warning just in case.

I kept watching for quite a long time, but I quit after the whole thing with ruby and Dorothy because what? it just felt so incredibly forced and badly written? and I'd gotten so annoyed because before we'd already had the whole thing with aurora and mulan, which I was rooting for but okay, that didn't work out, too bad for mulan. then we get a perfect set up for ruby and mulan. and it's just. never mentioned again???? ruby comes back eventually but wtf happened to mulan? it annoyed me so fucking much let me tell you.

also I remember trying to write out family/relationship trees and stuff for ouat to see how weirdly convoluted everything got. was very impressed that it seemed they managed to avoid accidentally having incest or something in the show with everything that was going on there.

I have so many more things but this has already gotten way longer than intended. do you have a favourite part of the show? I'm assuming your favourite characters is either regina or emma?

Oh man all of that brings back memories. I didn't stick around long enough for Ruby and Dorothy, but I got the sense that they were doing it to try and counteract the "avoiding Swan Queen because homophobia" allegations.

(I actually don't think they WERE avoiding Swan Queen because of homophobia, necessarily. I think it was never their intent to begin with; they just happened to attract a sapphic audience who were deeply on the Enemies to Lovers train. I do think they may have indulged in a bit of queerbaiting, though, because of some Emma/Regina moments that happened after the writers definitely knew the ship existed. I think it was never going to be canon, but they handled it poorly once they realized that people saw it as an option.)

I stopped watching around Frozen for a couple of reasons:

On a personal level, I just got sick of seeing the characters I shipped with other people. That's not an objective problem; it's my opinion and not everyone will agree. But to me, Hook was a whiny insecure manchild and Robin had the personality of Clippy the MS Word paperclip, and damnit, I wanted Emma and Regina to kiss each other instead of them!

On a This Is Bad Storytelling level, I HATED how Frozen was integrated. Earlier stories had been a nice blend of traditional fairytales with Disney adaptation elements- Beauty and the Beast where Gaston and Chip are both kind of there but in subtler ways, for example, or Cinderella where her dress resembles the 1950s animated version but everything else is different. Frozen, though, was just...Frozen. The entire plot of the movie Frozen had happened before the characters entered the OUAT storyline, their costumes were identical to those in the movie, and while I've heard that they added some different backstory- it just wasn't the "Hans Christian Andersen story with subtle Disney touches" that I would have expected from earlier seasons.

Personally, I don't think the initial curse should have been broken in a season. I feel like that locked them into a pattern of having to continually invent a new Darkest Evilest Most Powerful Magic EVER!!!!! to top the previous season, and that took them to some really weird places (I heard they went to literal hell at one point?). The show had a cool premise and some interesting ideas- I loved how they managed to give individual kingdoms distinct cultures and even fashions. You can tell the "look" of Snow White's kingdom from Cinderella's and Cinderella's from Ariel's, etc.

Everyone who would watch an entire season of Abigail's Ancient Greek Steampunk-ish kingdom, raise your hands. Seriously, so cool.

But something went wrong, IMO around season 4. I'm not sure if the show had just outlived its original concept or had outside pressures pulling it in different directions or what. All I know is, as far as I'm concerned, the show ends when Emma and Henry leave Storybrooke in season 3A. Pity It Was Cancelled So Soon, etc.

(although OOC Matronly SnowTM would have been perfect for live slug reaction memes, so there's that)

[senlinyu]

What was it about Draco that drew you to this character in the first place? I'm just curious because jk Rowling certainly did not portray him in a positive light.

I'm actually one of those horrible people who started shipping dramione before reading the books or even watching the movies. As I've mentioned before, I was raised ultra-conservative and I wasn't allowed to read Harry Potter, but I was inexplicably obsessed with understanding it because as a twelve year old, I felt intensely perceived by the concept of Hermione Granger.

So I found my way around my parent's internet filters and read the entire HP lexicon, and basically constructed an understanding of the HP universe backwards starting with worldbuilding, then characters, and finally plot.

But that's actually very difficult way to perceive a story, so then I found out about fanfiction and started reading HP fanfic voraciously, first Harmony, then a lot of gen fic, and then one day I randomly read a Harry/Hermione/Draco love-triangle fic that was Harmony end game. And the idea of Draco and Hermione was so complicated and charged and there was nothing in the progression of the pairing that could be taken for granted, and I found that much more compelling than a friends to lovers pairing. So I switched from Harmony and started reading Dramione (with a few different alternative pairing phases, I had a whole Hermione/marauder's era, did a bit of sevmione and lumione, went into a Weasley brothers phase, then a sapphic period, a tomione chapter, and a Draco/Ginny rendezvous, at this point I have tried practically every single HP pairing you can think of). And after about 5 years of that, I finally went to college and got to read the actual Harry Potter series.

So it started with preference for a charged relationship dynamic in story telling, but as I've gotten older and started writing I've come to find Draco a very interesting character to explore the redemption arc of. As previously mentioned, I come from a background where children are often raised in a way that's very socially and informationally isolated, and have parents who like to make their love conditional upon their children parroting their beliefs with complete conviction. Fortunately for me in the long run but quite traumatically at the time, I am obstinate and distrusting by nature, and so I wasn't particularly cooperative about it for the most part (see reading the entire HP lexicon since I wasn't allowed to just read Harry Potter), but I had siblings and friends who did. So the process of a young person nearing adulthood and realising that all the things they believed/were told to believe/thought had to be believe are actually horrible and nightmarish and untrue is something that I've watched people go through the process of trying to deconstruct.

JKR sets all her characters in amber and they all have the exact same character flaws for seven books and never really grow or evolve in any ways, but I like exploring the idea that people grow and can learn to do better and eventually be better. You can't really give someone a redemption arc unless they actually did something that they need to be redeemed from.

[the-writing-mobster]

were there any fic ideas you never ended up writing that you regret not doing?

also, do you have any other undertale ships? {:

Ah! Thank you for the ask dear heart! Let's see...

Of course I have fics that are still deep in my drafts, and I also have a few unfinished fics currently published ON Ao3.

I don't really regret not publishing certain fics because it's not really a matter of if more than it is a matter of when. A few of these old ideas just need way more fleshing out and just aren't ready for the limelight.

And that "not if but when" mindset is carried over to my unfinished fics as well, like Baby Face and YWIW.

They'll eventually be completed. (Although tbh, I'm not so sure about ywiw now, may have to go and really take a good long look at that one and the goals I want to achieve with it. For YWIW, I guess I regret some of the choices I made with Frisk's character arc. Like I accidentally walked back on things that I shouldn't have. Sequels are hard, y'all.)

—

Now for my other UT ships? Hmmmm...

I'm gonna come out the gate swinging and say that I, first and foremost do not ship Asgore and Toriel. I think their dynamic is more interesting as a divorced couple. Boom. That'll stir the pot some.

(I have a lot of weird UT ships tbh)

Now, moving on to what I actually ship:

Asriel x Papyrus / Papsriel / Boneblossom

This stems more from how I wrote their dynamic in wdyw part 4 + ywiw. See, when Frisk and Sans are off doing hard main character work, Papyrus and Asriel were alone together a lot, working through both of their collective daddy issues together (their fathers were big ole villains and they were consoling each other about their relationships with their fathers, it was actually very sweet) Ergo, I began to ship.

But also, if you look at the game, there are instances of Asriel and Papyrus befriending, and Asriel manipulating him, or growing fond of Papyrus in his own way as Flowey. Yeah there's the problem of "well technically Asriel is a child!" Which like... Okay, he's also dead and immortal at the same time. In wdyw he died at an older age so... 🤷🏻‍♀️ It depends on where you take the story. I could also just ship them platonically. So yeah!

Undyne x Alphys / Alphyne

This one is obvious. They're canon. They're beautiful. I love gay people. I love lesbians. I am a gay people. I am a lesbian. I love them.

Also, low-key, I also just like to explore more of their dynamic than just lovey dovey sapphic stuff. The highs and the lows. And they're perfect to do that with.

Nick x Sans / Nicecream Guy x Sans

This one is unorthodox, but it's because of Baby Face. They're so gay in that fic like it's unbelievable. If not Sans, then definitely Nick. Like they've definitely explored each other's bodies at least once.

Also in wdyw, they have a more complex, complicated friendship since they're more like long lost friends, and the whole "you betrayed our ideals by joining Asgore's military" and Nick "you joined a rebellion that will never win, you've doomed yourself to martyrdom." Sans saving Nick from prison & the purge, ugh, they're so complex, I love em!

Nick is definitely gay. I know we were pushing for Alick but honestly... That boy is gay. And I really believe that. I think the only better pairing for him would be Napstablook, or... And I guess I'll concede to years of shipping before me... Burgerpants/Bryan. Because Bryan has that like, newly joined rebellion, starry eyes, just found out his crush was brutally murdered by one of Muffet's assassins, etc, and then there's Nick, shining hero of the revolution. I think it could work really well.

Muffet x Toriel / Muffriel / Spiderscotch

Bro even the name screams lesbian, wtf? This is like Everlark's alternative ship name being peenis.

BRO THEY LIVE IN THE RUINS TOGETHER, MUFFET SET UP SHOP IN THE RUINS. TORIEL BAKES PIES AND MUFFET BAKES FUCKED UP SPIDER DONUTS. THEY'RE A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN. (And I'm purely talking about classic, but who's to say that wdyw Muffet wasn't sneaking into the queen's chambers after killing her own husband and poisoning Toriel's daughter right under her nose? UGH THE DRAMA!!!!)

Ugh, I love my gay ships.

Anyway, Toriel is the sweet, albeit very flawed, old money, cottage core wife, and Muffet is the manipulative, borderline Machiavellian, macabre, new money, goth wife and they're PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER. I've never been more serious in my life.

Anyway, those are my UT ships that are not Frans. Don't come for me, I know they're unconventional (except for Alphyne) but I love them each dearly.

.

.

.

Old pencil drawing I did:

[milkandhoneyfemme]

Femmes of tumblr, what does femme identity mean to YOU?

I’m a baby femme so I’m still new to this and would love to hear some more personal thoughts on femme identity <3

To me:

Femme is taking femininity in a cishet society and viewing it through an undeniably queer lens. When I express myself, I do so with intentions completely unrelated to society’s expectation of fem-aligned people. I am soft, and gentle, flowing and warm. And it is not with the intention of the “American dream” that I am easy on the eyes for cishet men, like something to look at through a bakery shop window for one man to eventually choose me for the taking.

It is with connection to my sapphic identity, ESPECIALLY in relation to my community (butches and other femmes alike). And yes, butchfemme romantic relationships are beautiful and holy, but also, it’s about family to me. That is where I am safe. This is the same culture that our lesbian predecessors lived in. Femmes and butches protect one another in a manner that you just don’t see every day.

In my relationship with my masc girlfriend, we compliment each other so well. I bake her cookies and send pictures whenever I buy a new dress. I deliver letters covered in lipstick prints and my perfume. She cracks open geodes to find pretty crystals for me. She has plans to build me a gazebo with her own two hands just because I said I always wanted one. She’s ready to throw hands at the drop of a hat to protect me. She makes me feel safer and more understood than anyone ever could.

It has also given me unprecedented levels of confidence in confirming my femme identity as a major middle finger to patriarchy. I saw a tiktok by another femme (@toothfairyfemme) describing how they want their femininity to be so extreme it makes men squirm, that it is sickly sweet and nauseating and “too much”, and oh my god YES. My femininity is PERFORMANCE. I want society to see me and feel threatened by how MUCH I am. I will not tone it down, or try to fit into a little box of what is expected of me. I am unapologetically lesbian and femme and I WILL NOT SHUT UP!!!