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bandgie · 10 months

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Hi! I ABSOLUTELY LOVED your Beast of a Man tarzan!smut. Seriously it was so engaging and you wrote him so well (HES SO HOT AGHH). He's such a hot character idk why others don't write about him, I'm starved for Tarzan fics...

Could you please make a part 2 to the smut? You have such a great/smutty idea going I would love to see you continue it!!

It would mean everything to me!

( ^◡^)

a/n: hi yes thank you so much and ofc! it's been so long since I've written smut on Tarzan so please bear with me! (fic anon is referring to here)

synopsis: You have successfully brought back the ape-man for research. Despite behaving like an animal, he's a lot more human in more ways than you originally thought.

warnings: MDNI 18+, recording during sex, oral (m!), 69ing, semi-public oral sex, cumming in mouth (m!&f!), rough throat fucking (f!rec), cum eating (m!&f!)

2.8k words

"Who the fuck is this?!"

Your colleagues screamed and ran upon seeing who, more like what, you brought back to camp. They hopped up on tables and held up papers as weapons. They eyed you both wearily, on the verge of tears as you stood just a few feet away.

"I think that's a bit extreme," you sigh.

The ape-man was beside you, clinging onto your leg like a child would do with a mother. He, too, was very wary around these strangers. You could hear him grunting and pulling at you as if keeping you from getting too close.

Cute yes, but this would mean it would take a lot of work to build trust in the entire group.

Slowly, the fellow researchers began to try and communicate with the man. Talking slowly and softly, just like you showed them to. All of you agreed that this being could be the missing link, the answer to the question anthropologists have tried to find for decades.

It took over a month for everyone to be comfortable around one another, but of course, another issue was raised.

"So does he just not have a name?" Professor Porter asked.

As of now, you all were just calling him 'the ape-man' or 'hey you' to get his attention. It never crossed your mind to give him an actual name.

"We're not gonna name that beast," Clayton butted his way into the conversation. Clayton, as big and strong as he was, seems the most afraid of your new friend. He's hostile, rude, and arrogant. Even if the ape-man cannot understand the words thrown at him, he can feel them.

The best thing to do in these situations was to ignore Clayton, he just loves the sound of his own voice.

"No," you turn your attention back to the professor. "Not that I know of at least. Should we come up with one?"

"Oh great," there's heavy sarcasm laced in Clayton's voice. "Here you are naming a dog you're not even gonna keep."

"With no due respect Clayton, please shut the fuck up," Terk, the youngest of you, speaks. Terk is small for his age, but he has built. A hairy man who's lively, talkative, and one of the natives that live here. He and the ape-man get along well, a little too well sometimes.

Clayton flips Terk the bird.

"A name for him would be nice, yes." The professor looks as though he's sweating from the tense atmosphere. "Do come up with one dear, I think the missing link would rather you do it."

It's no secret that the ape-man prefers you over the other researchers. He's constantly at your hip, following you like you have an invisible leash on him. Your colleagues, however, don't know how close you two actually are.

The conversation stays in your head for the rest of the day. A name. A name. Something everyone has yet is unbelievably difficult to come up with. Hundreds of possibilities run through your mind as you carry out your daily tasks. Even the ape-man, who's used to you ruffling his hair, grows confused about your behavior.

Nightfall comes with everyone in their tents and you still haven't come up with a name.

With a groan, you turn on your side to see the very person who's making you struggle already looking at you. His eyes are dark, but the candle in your tent lights up his features just enough. You reach out and brush a lock of hair out of his face, watching how he moves to try and get you to touch his skin.

You settle with resting the palm of your hand on his cheek, rubbing your thumb over it.

"A name," you tsk. You narrow your eyes and let your gaze travel over his body. He needs to look like his name, that's a must. "Hey, do you know what a name is?"

He doesn't answer.

"Something to call you. That's a name. Do you have one?"

He stares at you.

Well, this is going to be harder than you thought.

Pursing your lips, you say the first name that comes to mind, "Edward?"

He reacts to that. His calm expression turns into a scowl, bushy eyebrows coming together. You quietly laugh and shake your head, "Not that one okay."

"Tony?"

He frowns.

"Taren?"

He pouts.

"Okay, okay. I think I got it...Garrett."

The ape-man groans, mimicking the behavior he's seen you do hundreds of times. It shocks you to see him act so human, so you. It's equally adorable as it is terrifying.

He's gotten closer to you, a breath away. The proximity used to freak you out, but you've learned it’s how he shows his affection. His trust.

The ape-man is waiting for you to say a word he likes, a sound that comes off your tongue magically. Judging from your facial expression and earlier absent behavior, this is an important task for you.

You want the name to be strong, versatile, and not easily replaceable. The being you've found is one-of-a-kind, it's only fair his name is as well. You play with a few letters in your head, bouncing them in your mind until you think of one that suits him.

"What about Tarzan then? Do you like that one?"

His pupils dilate, watching your beautiful lips pronounce the word. His word.

"Yes."

You gasp, sitting up abruptly. Your sudden movements make him panic as he sits up with you. He scans the tent to find an intruder while you sit there stunned.

He spoke. The ape-man no! Tarzan just spoke to you. He understood language and used it, even if it was just a mere word. A one-syllable answer that has shaken you to your core.

"Oh my god. You just, Tarzan you just spoke. Holy shit, say it again. I need to capture this on video." You ruffle through your bag looking for your camera.

Tarzan stops searching the tent and looks back at you looking as confused as ever. Like he didn't just display human speech in a mere month.

Quickly, you pull out the camera and hit record, aiming the lens at Tarzan's hard, yet beautiful features.

"Repeat what you just said," you look at him through the monitor. Instead of complying, Tarzan stares blankly into the lens. "Do you like the name Tarzan?" You press.

No answer, his eyes flick from the red light to your eyes.

"Come on! Just tell me whether or not you like the name." You're starting to grow impatient. At this point, you're convinced he's just being an ass.

Finally, he adjusts his seating position. Tarzan glances down at his crotch then back up to you, then back to his crotch. You follow his gaze, trying to understand what he's trying to say. Then it clicks.

Compensation. If you want him to do you a favor, you have to do him one as well.

"Are you being serious?" You sigh at him. Tarzan gives a faint nod to you. Even if he can't do so, you swear you see him smirk. Asshole. Setting the camera down, you angle it towards the two of you. Might as well have fun with it.

You crawl your way towards him, parting his thighs slightly before giving him a playful glare, "You're such a man sometimes."

Unlike before, Tarzan wears cargo shorts rather than a mere piece of clothes from last time. Professor Porter made it clear that if he was to hang amongst you all, clothes were necessary.

They suited him nicely, even now. The way the material hugs his toned thighs, how his cock bulges through the shorts even when he isn’t hard. You couldn't help but run your hands along his muscular legs, finding his crotch.

He groaned as you palmed him, straining to not thrust his hips up. Tarzan learned to be patient with you, especially in the presence of others. Most animals didn't care whether they mated alone or in their pack. Even if Tarzan was raised by those animals, the thought of others hearing the sounds you make for him is repulsive.

Instead, he has to settle for brushing your hair from your face as you undo his buttons. Delicate fingers unzipping the seam until his half-hard cock sprouts in your face.

It doesn't matter how many times you've seen his dick, it makes your pussy quiver every time. All you can think about is how perfectly it stretches you, how the tip slides against your cunt deliciously. Your mouth salivates at the memory, and you let your spit drool off your tongue to land on his cock.

Tarzan loves the sigh. A pink tongue just hovering over his length. He also remembers the feeling of your hot mouth on him. The way your lips slowly come closer to the crown of his head, how your breath wafts over him. It feels euphoric when you finally make contact with him, mouth enclosing his flushed head.

It's so warm in your mouth, smooth as you lightly suck on him. The hand on your head slightly grips your hair, a sign that he likes the slow pace you've set. You hum around his cock, taking him a little deeper as you widen your jaw.

One of your hands makes way to grip the base, pulling the skin upwards in a stroking motion.

This makes his hips jerk, gagging you for just a split second. Your wide eyes look up at him, small tears peeking at the corners. Tarzan gives an apologetic look, but the sight of your teary eyes and pretty lips around his cock makes him fuck up toward you again.

You pull away from him, earning a whine as Tarzan throws his head back dramatically.

Maybe he thinks you're going to stop as punishment, but it's quite the opposite. Your cunt is sopping from tasting him, even if it was for a brief moment. Even if you have a task at hand, and your camera is still recording for 'research,' you have your own needs to take care of.

Tarzan is none the wiser as you put a hand on his bare chest and lay him down. He eyes you curiously but lets you push him all the way down before hopping on top. His eyes widen as he's faced with your clothed cunt. Underwear the same color as your tongue that holds the strongest smell of you.

He doesn't need any directions as he dives his nose into you. Tarzan is obsessed with your natural smell. His nose immediately grows damp from your wetness, his tongue poking out to lick the juices that leak out.

Softly moaning, you take a hold of his cock once more. You pump it a few times before taking it into your mouth. It's surprising to see that he's not humping in your mouth like normal, but he's so distracted with your pussy that he can't seem to bother noticing his own pleasure.

It's hard to focus on his hard length as his teeth tear off your panties. You gasp when you hear the fabric split, but it turns into a whine when his tongue finally makes contact with your bare cunt.

Tarzan has to grip your hips to keep you still. As much as he would love for you to grind on his face, he needs to have his meal first. His tongue runs over your folds, finding that little bud you love so much to be touched.

He sucks on it and pulls, stretching your clit. Your legs shake and you have to pull away from his cock to catch your breath. Lazy hands stroke his hard-on as you look back. You clench at the sight of his unruly hair peeking above your ass, the sounds his mouth makes as he laps at you.

Turning back to your literal task at hand, you find the energy to take his cock once more. You unhinge your jaw and exhale, taking Tarzan deeper and deeper until your eyes roll back. You hollow your cheeks and suck, moving your head back up until just the tip remains in your mouth, and go all the way back down.

Now Tarzan can feel the bliss of your mouth on him. He moans into your pussy and slightly jerks his hips up, making you gag around him once more.

Feeling you work so hard makes him want to reciprocate. He shakes his head left and right to try and bury himself deeper. He uses his grip to force you further onto his face. Tarzan's tongue finds the squeezing entrance that he's breached so many times. He digs his tongue into you, finally getting a taste of you from the source.

He's guiding your hips so you could drag your pussy against him how you like. Tarzan can feel your hips trying to pull away from him as the feeling of his tongue has gotten too much. And it has.

You're trying to distract yourself by deepthroating him, but it's no use. All you can feel is his experienced mouth, how he remembers every detail he knows you like. You can feel your orgasm approaching, and how it builds in your stomach rapidly.

Tarzan feels your legs shake. Your thighs trembling and giving out, full lower body weight on his face. He can taste how the wetness has changed, thicker and tart. Tarzan knows this taste like the back of his hand. You're going to cum, give him that white cream he loves licking out of you.

You've completely stopped paying attention to his dick. A part of you should feel bad for neglecting him, but you can't seem to care as Tarzan's tongue fucks you. Instead, you find yourself humping his face, his mouth following as you approach your high.

You squeal as you come, clamping a hand over your mouth as you finish. Warm gushes out of you, body quivering as the eager man under you happily drinks it all. Tarzan gulps and slurps until he's beginning dripping from the corners of his mouth.

He takes and takes until you're the one having to tell him no more, that you can't handle another orgasm.

Tarzan hears the desperation in your voice, the way you plead. It takes strength for him to pull away from your pussy, a soft growl emitting from his chest.

Then his thighs wrap around your head, securing you in front of his cock. You have no time to question him as you involuntarily take his cock into your mouth.

There's so much pre-cum dripping from the slit that all you can taste is its saltiness. He's throbbing, fucking his hips into your mouth as he holds you still with his legs.

All you can do is take it. Lips wrapping around his girth as he desperately slides his dick in and out. You gag and silently plead for Tarzan to be gentler, but he's having none of it. Your hands warp around his thighs to steady yourself, your head bobbing uncontrollably to match his movements.

Tarzan twitches in your mouth once, stilling his hips deep into your throat. Tears immediately prick your eyes and fall down your face, and you swear your vision goes black for a fraction of a second before he pulls out. You get the chance to gasp for air as he lines up his cock to your lips again and shoves it back in.

You think you might pass out. You're at the mercy of Tarzan, and he's still unable to see how much stronger he is than the average man. Your mouth is nothing but a fleshlight to him as he makes you choke around him. It makes you feel like a toy, a warm hole for him to fuck his seed into.

And you wouldn't have it any other way.

The familiar twitch in his cock occurs again. Once, twice, then three times before he unloads in your mouth. Hot spurts of his cum find themselves in your throat, forcing you to gulp it down.

Tarzan's hips slow, letting his cock drag against your lips before he finally pulls out. You cough and pant as his orgasm drips from your tongue.

His thighs release you and you promptly plop down on them. You feel his hands rub soothingly over the curve of your ass, up and down your thighs. And an extra apology, Tarzan presses a kiss to your throbbing pussy. You chuckle and kiss his thigh back before sitting up, hoping off his face.

You have to crawl to grab your camera, breathing a sigh of relief to see the red light still shining. You aim the lens at his face as he too sits up. You can see the arousal on his face from eating you out, his swollen lips, and messy hair.

"So," you start. "Tell me, Tarzan, did you like that?"

Tarzan's lips quirk into what you think is a smile before he looks at you directly through the camera.

"Yes."

a/n: holy fuck I dont think y'all know how hard this was. I kinda went all out for the first one so the second one was hard as hell to match lmaooo. I physically and mentally can't do a third installment. this is the final one sowwy also I added some characters from the film! hopefully you caught that, I made Terk human, Tarzan needed a friend even if it's a fanfic

#smut #tarzan x reader #tarzan smut #tarzan 1999 #tarzan and his mate #tarzan #beast #jungle smut #tarzan of the apes #tarzan au #tarzan fanfic #holy fuck what do I tag??#professor porter

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eeldritchblast · 9 months

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Lae'zel is Autistic

(Note: This post was written by someone with professionally diagnosed autism. A lot of what I'm about to say of Lae'zel, I can personally relate to! This is not intended as negativity or hatred of her character; rather, it is one of the reasons I adore her.)

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I really don't like that the writers have attempted to tone down Lae'zel's "rudeness" perceived by the larger fanbase. It reminds me too much of how "rudeness" is so often less about hostility and more about one's ability to perform social interactions to the standards of neurotypical people. So for the writers to decide that Lae'zel is too "rude" for not saying her please and thank yous every time she speaks, for being direct, for struggling to have two-sided conversations... well, to me, that's just saying that there was something wrong with her they felt the need to fix. I spent years with people trying to "fix" me in special ed. To teach me how to present as neurotypical, like memorizing appropriate responses to common questions, and pretending to hold eye contact by looking at people's lips. While I will admit it helps me in the workplace for example to perform these things, it also taught me to hate myself for being faulty in the first place. That's something I still struggle with to this day. So when a character like Lae'zel comes along, who I can relate to in her coded autism, I don't want to see her changed. I want to see her celebrated.

Here are some of the signs of autism I've noticed in Lae'zel:

Difficulty regulating and understanding emotion:

Lae'zel is a very passionate person, and can get carried away by that passion. At the same time, she is not very good at self-inventory of her emotions. After she defies Vlaakith in Act 3, she asks the player to help her understand what she is feeling, because she cannot place it herself.

Directness:

As said above, Lae'zel is vert blunt in the way she communicates. If you've picked up the game only in later patches, let me tell you that she was originally even more so. If the player asks Lae'zel why she is the way she is, she says it's just because she is githyanki. While I certainly think some of this could be attributed to a difference in culture, we meet other githyanki, and they do not carry the same speech and manner she has.

Taking things literally:

Lae'zel equally does not understand indirectness from others, or idioms. For example, when Shadowheart asks if they have "buried the hatchet" between them, (an American idiom to mean "making peace" which by the way, is not a very appropriate idiom,) she answers with "why would I bury a weapon?" Again, this could be attributed to a difference in background, but nonetheless something to relate to.

Dislike of small talk:

Literally the first thing Lae'zel says to you after you recruit her is, "chatter already? Tas'ki."

Inflection:

Lae'zel is voiced with minimal modulation of intonation or pitch. As such, she sounds monotone and serious, even when the words she says are lighthearted or joking.

Difficulty handling change of routine/expectancy:

When things do not go as Lae'zel is determined they are supposed to go--for example, the machine she thinks will remove her tadpole not working as she believed it would--she has wild, uncontrolled outbursts.

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There's probably even more one could list here, but for now I'm done. I may edit this later, though.

#lae'zel #bg3 lae'zel #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 meta #meta

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thepersonperson · 3 months

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Sukuna's You Pronouns

Someone pointed out that Sukuna doesn't exclusively use the you pronoun Kisama for Gojo in the tags as a response to this post. Sukuna also uses it for Kashimo.

This prompted me to go back and double-check his you pronoun usage with everyone since I focused on people he openly likes (Gojo, Higurama, Jogo, Megumi, Maki, Uraume).

And that, of course, spiraled out of control. Please enjoy my findings. (Someone made a formal response to this post if you want an alternate perspective.)

-Written as of JJK 262.5.

-Mangareader(.)to for the raws.

-TCBscans for everything else.

(Click images for captions/citations.)

Preface

Here's a shorthand for how Sukuna addresses characters with you pronouns. Not when he's speaking about them to other people, but when talking to them directly.

No You Pronouns: Haruta, Higurama, Kenjaku, Kusakabe, Mahito, Miguel, Ui Ui, Uraume

Omae: Finger Bearer, Gojo, Jogo, Mahoraga, Maki, Mimiko/Nanako, Megumi, Ryu, Yorozu, Yuji, Yuta

Kisama: Gojo, Kashimo, Yorozu

What does 'no you pronouns' mean?

Not using you pronouns or someone's name is the most polite and formal way to go about addressing someone in Japanese. Using you pronouns invites certain assumptions about the relationship between the speaker and the addressee. In most cases it's informal or rude. Sukuna going out of his way not to use pronouns for someone suggests he views them with some amount of respect. (Except for Haruta. To this day, this is the only character Sukuna has called trash.)

What does Omae and Kisama mean?

お前 (Omae), often written as オマエ in JJK, is a masculine, informal, and indicates the speaker's higher status to the addressee. It can also be used as a causal you between peers of equal standing (Gojo, Yuji, and Megumi use Omae for everyone in this way).

There is a third use in the context of love. It's the male equivalent of あなた (Anata aka the wife pronoun you could translate as "You, Dear") when used by a man to their lover. This usage seems to have conflicted usage irl. It might be too intimate or informal depending on the relationship. (Basically it pisses some people off or is a massive turn on.)

貴様 (Kisama) is historically formal and respectful, and modernly an extremely informal and hostile insult that is far more rude than Omae.

Which way does Sukuna mean his Omaes and Kisamas? Well, context is everything. He is 1,000 years old, rude as hell, and a hater. In most instances, he means the rude version. Trying to figure out when he's not being a bastard is the hard part and what I'm interested in.

Why does this matter?

Pronouns in Japanese indicate how the speaker views themself and how they view their relationship to the addressee. In other words, pronoun usage in Japanese carries characterization that gets lost in translation. I'm trying to figure out Sukuna's internal logic and his particular brand of communication so this is a helpful thing to consider.

For example, when Gojo first trash talks Sukuna out of the box, Uraume gets pissed and insults him. And guess what they use as the insult—Kisama.

I put this side by side with an English translation for context. If you noticed, there is no kanji for "Swine" in the raws. That was added in by the localization to carry over the tone of the original. Since English doesn't have a you (derogatory), this is where localizations will vary the greatest. To get across the hostility of Kisama, translators will add extra things with or without the creator's direction for their language's audience.

Uraume is extremely polite to Sukuna and uses high level vocabulary in Japanese. The only time their politeness drops is when they're being hostile (especially with Kenjaku), but their elegant manner of speech doesn't deteriorate with their mood. In my opinion, "Swine" is a great word to pick that carries that insulting, yet dignified pattern of speech. Someone less snobby might use pig.

Gojo replies by referring to Uraume with てめえ (Temee) which is even more rude than Kisama. (Sometimes this you is spelled as てまえ (Temae) instead.)

This stands out because Gojo either uses Omae (friends and enemies), no you pronouns (everyone), or 君 Kimi (students—this one is cute because it's an affectionate way to dote on your juniors). (Gojo also exclusively uses アンタ Anta with Toji but that deserves its own post.) Not just that, but he ends his sentence with だよ (Dayo). This is a combination of the particles だ (Da) and よ (Yo) that emphasizes what ever the speaker is saying without respect.

Both TCBsans and Viz localize this as "Who are you?" That's a direct translation that in my opinion doesn't get across how pissed Gojo is. If it were up to me, I think it would be better as "Who the FUCK are you?"

Anyways I hope this explains why I'm so obsessed with how Sukuna uses you pronouns. There's characterization and tone that translators may or may not pick up on. Figuring out why Sukuna uses certain yous helps with understanding how he views others.

Omae

As you saw in the list, Sukuna uses Omae for just about everyone. It ranges from people he openly hates (Yuji) to characters he massively respects (Mahoraga). The easy way to resolve this is to assume that Sukuna looks down on everyone so that's what he means at all times.

I don't think that's the case. Sukuna is a very complex character with weird motivations that don't fit neatly into black/white boxes. Reading his words a single way at all times seems to be a disservice to him. So I'll be presenting my theories on what determines the meaning of Sukuna's Omae.

Omae (Deragatory)

Itadori Yuji

When Sukuna uses Omae for Yuji, it's coupled by insults. That's not surprising, Sukuna despises Yuji so much that he's devoted a good deal of his time to making his poor little nephew suffer. I can confidently say the Omaes are derogatory. Here is one of many instances.

No matter how angry Sukuna gets at Yuji, he has never deviated from Omae. This is interesting to me because the more hostile and ruder you pronouns Kisama and Temae/Temee exist. In fact, Yuji uses Temee for Sukuna most of the time. And he uses Temee for no one else, not even Mahito, who gets Omae like Yuji’s friends. This special pronoun usage for Sukuna shows how much Yuji hates him compared to any other character.

Anyways, this is a good starting point for determining how he means Omae. When Sukuna means Omae in a rude way, it'll be combined with an insult and/or accompanied by an aggravated facial expression. He also will avoid addressing the character by name and instead use nomers (such as Brat) externally and internally.

Finger Bearer

Despite trying to befriend this curse for the sole purpose of bullying children, Sukuna doesn’t show the Finger Bearer a lot of respect. He tries to kill it, insults it at every turn, and gives it a few nasty faces for attacking him. It’s no surprise he uses Omae for this thing.

He treats this curse like he treats Yuji, which is a pretty good sign that the Omae usage is disrespectful. This is also helps establish a pattern for Sukuna’s behavior when he chooses to engage with other beings. It should be noted that he calls the Finger Bearer an insect and refuses to address it by anything that's dignified.

Hasaba Mimiko & Nanako

Sukuna addresses Mimiko and Nanako as you kids and with Omae for bringing him a finger. He also demands they bow before him to acknowledge just how far beneath him they are.

He doesn’t ask for their names and he kills them the second he finds them too annoying. There’s a clear lack of respect for the twins here that makes the Omae appear to be very deragatory.

Jogo

Jogo starts in the same category as Mimiko wnd Nanako. That much is obvious with Sukuna cutting off the top of his head for mot bowing low enough. Sukuna uses Omae to both address and insult him, so it can be assumed he’s being deragatory.

But what separates Jogo from everyone on this Derogatory Omae list, was his fight changing how Sukuna viewed him and therefore the usage of Omae.

Omae (Complimentary)

Jogo

Jogo is never addressed by name, Sukuna never asks for it and refers to him as Cursed Spirit throughout their interactions. This seems more in line with something Sukuna does to someone he dislikes, however, he bothered with seeing Jogo off into the afterlife to gain a better understanding of him.

When Sukuna learns that Jogo and his friends wanted to become human, he doesn’t mock their dream but their methodology. The criticisms he levies at Jogo are constructive. If Jogo wanted to obtain his goals he should’ve been more like Gojo and burned everything to the ground, etc.

Sukuna goes onto complimenting Jogo using Omae, ending on the iconic, “Stand proud, you’re strong.”

If this is enough to move Jogo to tears, the Omae here unlikely to be meant as something rude. This shows that Sukuna is capable of using Omae in a friendly manner and that the intent behind it can change with the same character over time.

Fushiguro Megumi

Before Sukuna realizes Megumi's potential with Mahoraga he is still quite friendly with him compared to other characters. (As friendly as you can get beating the life out of someone that is.) He compliments his Cursed Technique (CT) and shows interest in his internal logical as he tries to teach him how to be a better sorcerer. Omae is used as he does this.

When he senses Mahoraga, he starts calling Megumi by his full name, which is the most respectful way to directly address someone in Japanese. I'm pretty sure the Omae he uses from the start is well-meaning. It should be noted that he stops using you pronouns for Megumi after this, upping the ante when it comes to showing respect for him. (Outside of murdering his sister and caretaker with his body you know.)

Mahoraga

When Sukuna first fights Mahoraga, he avoids using you pronouns entirely. He has fun and very much values its strength so this is definitely a show of respect. The only time Sukuna uses a you pronoun for Mahoraga is during his fight with Gojo. He uses Omae after addressing Mahoraga by name. "You (Omae) are not Fushiguro Megumi's shadow, you're mine."

I'm pretty confident the Omae is friendly here, albeit very possessive. It almost reads like Sukuna's composure slightly breaking to show his excitement. His manner of speech does seem to get rougher the more into a fight he gets, and so far the wildest we've seen him is with Mahoraga and Maki.

Zenin Maki

Sukuna has yet to address Maki by name. He calls her The Woman when thinks about her or speaks of her to other people. However, since meeting her in Ch 215, he has always been impressed with her. Sukuna has not once insulted her prowess and has exclusively complimented her, just like Mahoraga. He dodges using you pronouns with her, a sign of respect, until he starts flipping out over her in Ch 253.

Similar to Mahoraga, his excitement appears to have made his manner of speech deteriorate. Combined with those expressions, the Omae usage here can’t possibly be coming from a place of hatred. Sukuna seems to like people similar to himself and Maki did “eat” her twin to gain power. She rejected her fate as a twin to survive. I think Sukuna recognizes that and admires it immensely.

Omae (Unknown)

Ishigori Ryu

When Sukuna first tries to kill Ryu, he doesn’t die. This impresses him so much that he apologizes for taking him lightly. The Omae he uses while doing this is probably complimentary.

However, Sukuna is kind of a dick and not above sarcasm. He doesn’t ask for Ryu’s name and doesn’t bother watching him die like he does with most other named characters. And if you noticed, he tried cutting him into 3 pieces like he did with the Finger Bearer to gauge his strength. That cursed spirit is barely above Yuji on Sukuna’s tolerance scale. I’m not sure if he’s being genuine here.

Okkotsu Yuta

Before Yuta takes over Gojo’s body, Sukuna doesn’t seem impressed with him. He doesn’t address him by name and uses the nomer Cursed Brat when thinking of him. Being called a Brat puts him on the same level as Yuji. I think the Omae here is derogatory.

He does seem to enjoy fighting Rika so there’s a little more respect than what he has for Yuji. But prior to Ch 261? I think he means it in a rude way.

Similar to Ryu, Yuta got Sukuna to apologize to him after impressing him. But unlike Ryu, Sukuna makes direct eye contact with Yuta and addresses him by name. The excitement on his face is almost identical to what he had for Maki. If Sukuna continues to use Omae for Yuta, it will be complementary. Especially since his internal dialogue now uses Okkotsu Yuta in the same way he uses Fushiguro Megumi.

For reasons I’ll get into, there’s also a strong chance Sukuna might swap to Kisama for Yuta. And if he does, it’ll be very significant.

Kisama

In a different post, I proposed that because Sukuna is old and hates Yuji the most, who he exclusively uses Omae with, that his usage of Kisama with Gojo is the formal version. But after learning that Sukuna uses Kisama with Yorozu and Kashimo, I want to reevaluate that interpretation.

Uraume using Kisama as an insult towards Gojo means that Sukuna is aware of and therefore capable of using the polite and hostile versions. If this is because of vessel memories or both meanings being present in Heian era I don't know. Regardless, just like Omae, additional context will be needed to determine which way he means it.

Yorozu

That's surprising, Sukuna is using Kisama with Yorozu when he has otherwise demonstrated that his usage of it with Gojo is formal. Does that mean he secretly likes her? Sukuna outwardly despises Yorozu, so it wouldn't be wrong to read his Kisama with her as hostile. Does that mean he hates her more than Yuji? Does that mean he hates Gojo?

Let's start with how he greets her. Sukuna initially uses Omae and addresses Yorozu by her name with a slight smile. All signs that his Omae is further towards friendliness than hostility even though he's here to kill her. (Sukuna communicates with violence this is normal for him.)

But the moment she brings up love? Sukuna swaps to Kisama. He uses it to insult her love too.

Sukuna is not showing respect here, he is actively being hostile with this use of Kisama. Of all characters, Yorozu would be the one who reads into Sukuna's words the most if it would frame things more romantically. The fact she sees this pronoun change as a part of the rejection and pursues him harder further supports this reading.

As she's dying Sukuna switches back to Omae. This can be read as him believing he's effectively told Yorozu to piss off with the love talk and is being a little nicer as she passes. It wouldn't be out of character for him to do this.

Still, he's insulting her CT and lack of battle intellect. She's definitely not amongst the likes of Jogo. Yorozu reads into his parting words as affection anyways and this is how Sukuna feels about that.

I'm comfortable marking down Sukuna's use of Kisama with Yorozu as one of disrespect, and Omae as slightly derogatory.

Kashimo

For Kashimo, Sukuna exclusively uses Kisama when addressing him. Now that would seem a bit sus given the exclusivity, but once again, context is everything. What separates Kashimo from everyone else he uses Kisama with is Sukuna's refusal to know or even speak his name. And if he checked Culling Game player names prior as a participant, this is pretty significant.

When Sukuna really likes someone, he addresses them by their full name, if possible. In fact, he pauses his fight with Higuruma to ensure he got his name correctly.

No such thing occurs for Kashimo. Additionally, he brings up love, which Yorozu has established as something that makes Sukuna more hostile. His entire love speech uses nothing but Kisama and Sukuna goes from cordial to visibly irritated. There's a strong chance he meant it in the piss off way.

As an aside, Kashimo first addresses Sukuna with Omae at the start of their battle and switches to あんた (Anta) when they discuss love and satisfaction 満足 (Manzoku).

Now this fascinates me because Anta is a contraction of Anata. It usually indicates the lack of class in the speaker, but is otherwise used just like Anata. Since Kashimo is talking about love and uses Omae for everyone else, this reads as Kashimo hitting on Sukuna. (In other words: Are you, dear, satisfied?)

And this is Sukuna's response to that.

Rejection.

I'm mostly comfortable marking this down as a hostile use of Kisama. Not sure if this means Sukuna hates Kashimo more than Yuji though. They did have a civilized conversation that wasn't exclusively insults. The worst Sukuna called him was greedy, and he briefly expressed annoyance with the loudness of his CT. It’s not like Yorozu where he mocked every aspect of it and her love to the end. He humored the loved talk even though it seemed to make him miserable. Not really sure what to do with this.

Gojo Satoru

Well, now that I know Sukuna is aware of the hostile meaning, there is a good chance when he promised to kill Gojo he meant it in the piss off way for humiliating him earlier. He didn't bother addressing Gojo by his full name despite knowing it at that point.

If Jogo showed us that Sukuna’s use of Omae can change over time, this means that his use of Kisama is capable of evolving too. That being said, it is still pretty confusing when it comes to Gojo because Sukuna combines his hostile and friendly mannerisms at the same time.

The Gojo fish speech showcases this frankly bizarre contradiction the best. He addresses Gojo by his full name and then insults him for being a nameless fish with the use of Kisama.

Prior to this scene, Sukuna has been thinking of him and speaking to other characters of him as Gojo Satoru. When Sukuna thinks about Yuji? His inner dialogue keeps calling him Brat. Maki, who he likes, is just The Woman (so far). If someone is nameless to Sukuna, they stay just that—nameless. He’s blatantly lying about how he views Gojo here and I have no idea why.

What’s even weirder is that for a single instance, Sukuna swaps to Omae for Gojo during their fight. The usage of Omae appears to be playful in this context as Sukuna uses an English word alongside it.

If you didn't know, it's cool to use English words in Japanese. Randomly sprinkling them in is something youths like to do a lot. Gojo himself is one of the people who does this. Not just in normal speech, but specifically when he’s engaging in “play” with other sorcerers.

What’s weird about Sukuna doing this to Gojo is the fact that English didn’t make it to Japan until the 1600s. Sukuna very much speaks like a weird out of touch old man from the wrong century. To my knowledge, (correct me if I’m wrong) he hasn’t used English like this prior.

Omae is the go-to you pronoun Gojo uses for most people. He also uses English when engaging in sorcery “play”. This almost seems like Sukuna is mimicking Gojo’s style of speech as either a form of flattery or as an insult (most likely flattery given that he is still copying Gojo's moves obsessively). Regardless, Gojo seems to pick up on Sukuna being playful since this is his response.

From his perspective, the guy calling him Kisama (aka you bastard) has started calling him Omae (you, but neutral), which would come across as Sukuna deliberately being more respectful towards him. It seems to put Gojo in such a good mood that loverboy Kashimo looks at this and goes:

Which starts to make me wonder. Did Sukuna mean Omae in the Anata way? After all, the previous chapter ended on this:

It ended on Sukuna thinking of Gojo as Anata. This fight can be framed as a date too, so it’s really sus that Sukuna swapped to Omae for an event that can be read as romantic.

The only reason I'm looking so closely at this usage is because it's sandwiched between Kisamas. It stands out enough for Gojo of all people to notice. To him it signified that Sukuna’s view of him had changed. That probably means this Omae is telling us something about Sukuna’s character.

Surrounding this Omae is the use of Kisama in the kill context a total of 8 times. Either as "I'm going to kill you." or "This is how I killed you." (Fish speech not included in this collage.)

What stands out to me compared to other characters is how happy Sukuna looks while describing how he’ll get past Infinity. It’s so persistent and detailed sometimes... (To be fair he did spend 6 months on this.)

The use of Kisama with "You cleared my skies." is definitely the respectful way. He addresses Gojo by name with a happy expression while showering him in praise.

The rest of the Kisamas? I don’t know. You could read it either way and it's not being used in the same way for Yorozu and Kashimo. The takeaway here is that Sukuna doesn’t usually use this pronoun, which means it’s significant when he does.

What did Sukuna mean by this?

The problem, once again, is Sukuna priming others to read him a certain way. Way back when Sukuna and Gojo first met? Probably hostile. During their rematch? Kisama was coupled with contradictory insults and/or death threats up until the very last second. And that still doesn’t explain the Omae.

He only used Kisama for Kashimo. Why did he briefly swap to Omae for Gojo? He swapped to Omae for Yorozu as she died. Why did he swap in the middle of their fight instead of the end for Gojo?

And this still doesn't address the massive elephant in the room—Sukuna only using Kisama for Yorozu and Kashimo because they had the audacity to bring up love to him. Gojo didn't try to do that. Not once. The only time the word "love" has explicitly come out of his mouth to another character was when he told Yuta love was the most twisted curse of all. What does this mean? Is this implying Sukuna has associated Gojo with love from the start? Am I reading too much into this pronoun usage?

One of the most prominent themes of JJK is love being a curse. Whether its Yuji's love for other people driving him forward after they die or Gojo's love for Geto screwing everything up. Yuta's entire deal is him cursing a loved one into a semi-immortal monster creature. It would not be out of the ballpark to have the main antagonist motivated by a very fudged up obsessive love in the same way Kenjaku's parental love speedruns Mommy and Daddy issues at the same time.

Yuta fighting Sukuna in Gojo’s body is significant for all these reasons. Sukuna is either going to stick to Omae, or he’s going to start using Kisama. With how happy he is at seeing Yugo, it’ll be meant positively.

If he keeps using Omae that’s not too weird. That’s normal Sukuna behavior. If he swaps to Kisama when it has been strongly suggested that in 2/3 instances it’s in relation to love… I’m going to be sus on why he’s using it for The Love is the Most Twisted Curse of All Poster Child, Yuta, who is piloting Gojo’s body.

#cactus yaps #I'm being gaslight by Greg Arbuckle.#This is like the 3rd time that examining Sukuna's relationships has driven me mad.#He's so finicky with how he treats others. But there are patterns.#Straight up the headache I'm getting from this is similar to how Umineko fried my brain until it all collapsed into the answer.#I feel like whatever the hell happens with Sukuna vs Yugo will confirm or deny this all.#I'm thinking Sukuna will eat Yugo for his 20th finger. Or he will forcefeed himself to Yugo for Gojo's body and the 20th finger.#If he does either of those things I'm going to start calling him slurs (affectionate).#Gojo is Sukuna's special something. That I can say for sure.#ryomen sukuna #sukugo #jujutsu kaisen #jjk spoilers

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room-surprise · 4 months

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Izutsumi's name, meaning and cultural references

This is an excerpt from Chapter 6 of my Dungeon Meshi essay, "Real World Cultural and Linguistic Influences in Delicious in Dungeon"

IZUTSUMI

(Japanese Pronunciation: Idzutsumi)

(Spoilers for the entire manga and post-manga materials!)

Izutsumi (イヅツミ) is a beast-man created by attaching a human soul to a monster cat, which is why she won’t ever be able to “turn back” into a human: she was never human to begin with. We don’t know what Izutsumi’s birth name was, if she even had one. The human that was killed was probably a baby or young child, since they don’t seem to have any memories of their mother, so they may not have ever been named.

We know that Izutsumi is from a different, larger island in the Eastern Archipelago to the northeast of Wa Island, however we do not know if this is the origin point of her human half, her monster cat half, both, or if this is just where she was made.

We do know that when she saw an illusion of what she thought was her human soul’s mother, the illusion was wearing something similar to North or Central Asian clothing, not Japanese clothing, so the island Izutsumi comes from is probably not culturally Japanese like Wa Island.

PLANT: ASEBI

Izutusmi’s code name as a ninja is Asebi (アセビ), which is the Japanese name for Japanese andromeda (pieris japonica), a type of shrub. The kanji for this plant’s name is 馬酔木 and it literally means “horse intoxicating tree” because it was known to be toxic to horses and make their legs go numb. A code name like this could imply a rude sentiment like “you’re so unpleasant, just being near you makes horses sick.” Considering the hostile relationship Izutsumi has with the Nakamoto clan, this code name makes a lot of sense.

IZUTSUMI THE FAMILY NAME

Izutsumi (井堤) is a common family name in central Japan, especially Kanagawa Prefecture. It is historically affiliated with the Tachibana (橘氏) clan, which was one of the four most powerful kuge (court nobility) families in Japan's Nara and early Heian periods.

The Tachibana clan’s founder was Inukai Michiyo (犬養三千代) whose name was changed to Tachibana Michiyo by Empress Genmei. Michiyo was a court lady of the early Nara period and mother of Empress Kōmyō.

The family name Inukai (犬養) literally means to own or keep a dog, but the character for dog historically refers not only to dogs, but to any four-legged animal, especially those that are ancient or magical.

Over the course of the 9th and 10th centuries, the Tachibana clan’s rivals pushed the Tachibana out of power, and the clan was scattered across the country. I’m not certain, but it sounds to me like “Inukai” as a family name describes a profession, in this case, someone who is in charge of keeping four-legged beasts of all kinds. In the world of Dungeon Meshi, maybe this name implies they are a professional monster keeper, or monster trainer.

Though it’s a somewhat tenuous connection, the idea that Izutsumi’s human half might have been a stolen child from the Tachibana/Inukai family, which tames monsters, is very interesting! Another possibility is that the Tachibana/Inukai family were the ones that provided the monster cat used for making Izutsumi. Perhaps they were experimenting with making beast-kin soldiers in an attempt to fight back against their rival kuge clans.

IZU-TSUMI

Let’s break down the name Izutsumi into its sound components and what they might mean.

TSUMI

The primary meaning for tsumi is 罪, a Japanese word that indicates the violation of legal, social or religious rules, so you could translate it as sin, abomination, or a crime against god and humanity.

In Ancient Japan the word usually implied that a divine punishment was occuring, and something that was tsumi would therefore carry disease, be polluted and unclean, suffer from disasters, or be ugly and unsightly.

Considering the way people of the Eastern Archipelago discriminate against all races that aren’t tall-men, and the way the Nakamotos make Izutsumi cover her body and face up completely, I think Kui probably meant for Izutsumi’s name to convey this meaning.

However, although the negative connotation is the most common, tsumi can also be a name, or part of a name (Tsumigiwa, Tsumiki, Tsumio, Tsumire, etc.) which makes it sound natural when used in Izutsumi’s name.

It can also refer to the Japanese sparrowhawk, Chinese mulberry, a spindle, a whelk, a child's wooden building blocks, to accumulate (bricks, like a wall, or savings, like money), to build a reputation or gain experience, atonement (for sin), to pluck, to load with cargo, or to send away.

These meanings are interesting, since they suggest that Izutsumi is “sent away” by Toshiro when he lets her go, and by joining Laios’ party she is gaining life experience, building herself up (like a wall, like a child with toy blocks), and becoming a more mature person, moving past her old identity of being a sinful mistake. Through the course of the manga she learns to accept herself as she is, and eventually discovers that there was nothing to “fix”, she cannot become a full human, because she wasn’t one to begin with.

IZU THE PERSONAL NAME

Izu is either a girl’s name, or a component of several Japanese names for any gender (Izumi, Izuko, Izuchi, etc), so putting together Izu+tsumi creates a compound that sounds like a Japanese personal name, though I have found no evidence of it as an existing personal name.

IZU THE PLACE

Many names reference where a person or their family are from, so it’s possible that Izutsumi (or her family, or the magicians who made her a beast-man) are from a place called Izu.

Izu (伊豆) is the historic name of a province which is now part of the Shizuoka Prefecture, which is to the west of Tokyo. This area is the Izu peninsula, a large mountainous area, and it contains Izu city, and nearby is the Izu island chain.

Many of the Izu islands are and have been uninhabited, however a few of the islands do have small populations, and Jomon and Yayoi ruins have been found on several of them, indicating that the ancestors of modern Japanese people once lived in these places. I was unable to find any information about whether any other ethnic groups have specifically lived on these islands.

During the Tokugawa shogunate (one of the primary eras that Dungeon Meshi’s Wa Island resembles), the Japanese court frequently sent nobility into exile in the Izu islands because the region was far away from the capital, and it was considered an unlucky and bad place to be. It’s unclear if the Izu islands already had this reputation before they became a place of exile, or if the negative reputation was caused by its use as a prison. There is some indication that the Izu islands were somehow seen as ritually unclean or dangerous.

Eventually the criteria for banishment was broadened and the islands became penal colonies, where people were sent for murder, theft, arson, brawling, gambling, fraud, jailbreak, rape, and belonging to illegal religions (Christianity). Criminals exiled to the island were never told the length of their sentences, and the history of the island is filled with foiled escape attempts.

Not only were the islands used as a prison to keep politically dangerous people away from Kyoto, they also held an important religious role as a barrier between the supposed purity of the central court in Kyoto and the unclean dangers beyond the borders of Japan.

The islands were the first line of magical defense against the dangers that threatened Japan, and the ritual experts, a type of shaman called an urabe, practiced a special kind of turtle-shell divination in Izu.

It’s possible that Izutsumi’s human soul came from the Izu region. Izutsumi’s human part could have been a native of the Izu mainland, an Izu islander, or the child of a prisoner. No matter which one it is, being from Izu would make Izutsumi very low-ranking and unimportant, which would make her human half a perfect target for someone trying to find a baby or child that they could sacrifice to make a beast-man.

It’s also possible that the magician that made Izutsumi lived and worked in Izu, since it’s a place that had magical and ritual significance, was seen as a place of pollution and danger where such “unclean” work could be done, and where there is a ready supply of unwanted human beings (prisoners, islanders and their kin) available to be used as raw materials.

Perhaps they made many beast-men, and so since “tsumi” means abomination, perhaps the name Izutsumi simply means “abomination made in Izu.”

IZU THE VERB

Izu (出ず “dezu”) is also an archaic verb used by the lower-class that can mean a great variety of things, though there does seem to be some common ideas being expressed through all of them. Here are the ones that I think apply the most to Izutsumi:

Doesn’t come out (She’s been hidden in her ninja clothes for a long time.)

To leave on a journey, to depart, to move forward (She leaves her old life behind.)

To appear, to emerge, to be discovered (She surprises Laios’ party and then joins them.)

To be exposed, exhibited, displayed (She grew up displayed in freak shows.)

To sell (She was sold by many people.)

To exceed, to go over (Her behavior is often seen as rude and “too much.”)

To stick out, protrude (Her ears stick out, giving her identity as a beast-man away.) To come from, to be derived from (She “comes from” tsumi, she was created by an abominable act.)

To assume an attitude, to behave in a manner (She behaves like tsumi, an abomination, uncivilized.)

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #izutsumi #izutsumi dungeon meshi #The Essay

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coffeetank · 6 months

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Build CHARACTERS!

Every time you write a book, you're creating a journey for your reader. Your main characters are the medium through which this journey is carried out. Your readers see the events in the book through your characters' eyes. Thus, it's very important to have characters that feel human, even though they might not be (if you're talking fantasy).

Now, of course, if your writing fantasy and your character is a dragon or some mythical fox, they won't act the way a human would. But that's the best part about making characters, you can give them layers. No matter the circumstance, every character will have a way of responding or reacting to it. That's where your characterisation comes in.

Here are a few things I do to make my characters, well characters:

1. MORAL CODE:

Your characters, regardless the genre, are the immediate connection to your readers. Fantasy or not, they'll be carrying the story. So they need to have a set of values that they follow. When you're affixing a moral code to your characters, first take an example setting. Suppose, you've created a character named A. Let's say A is a man and a detective by profession. Now let the main event of your story be a case of murder. Obviously, there's going to be an investigation. Let your detective (A) find out that the victim, who is a woman, was a sex worker. After the victim's body comes back from a forensic search, let there be signs of sexual assault. Now conventionally, as a detective, A is supposed to jump into action and go above and beyond to find the culprit and bring justice. But here is where you can add a characteristic that isn't conventional. Even though A is a detective, make him look down on sex workers. That would mean that A believes that the victim probably 'asked' for whatever happened to her. Your character needs to have a moral code so that they can ignite some sort of feelings in your readers. This moral code further also revs the whole process of character development. In a nutshell, a moral code is a set of beliefs that your character has which can either be agreeable, or questionable, or both. We call them the white zone (virtuous/agreeable), the black zone (evil/questionable) and the infamous morally grey zone (both).

2. OPPOSING QUALITIES:

This is by far the most interesting advice I have ever received. Opposing qualities are actually simple – it's one quality (that's good) and it's inverse (which is a flaw). What you do here is, you give your characters a good/admirable quality and then you give them flaws based on those specific good traits. Some of these that I have used are:-

helpful :: people-pleaser (you character helps others but at the same time seeks validation from others, thus only helps people who validate them)

confident :: cocky (you're character is confident, but they often come off as cocky in situations requiring humility)

perfectionist :: obsessive (are they a perfectionist or are they just obsessed with having things go their way only?)

supportive :: nosey (sure, they support all their friends, but they also tend to poke their nose into everything which makes them ignore or overlook people's boundaries)

straightforward :: rude (they are straightforward and don't shy away from speaking their mind which is good; however, they end up saying things which could be harsh or hurtful)

reserved :: unfriendly (character can be introverted and reserved too, but sometimes they get away with being outright hostile all in the name of their introvertism)

protective :: possessive/controlling (this is easy to confuse as both parties involve an exceptional amount of care for their loved ones, but ask yourself - are protective and possessive really the same?)

practical :: ignorant (one of my favourites; is your character just level-headed about stuff? or are they just heedless to others' emotions?)

There's so much more you can do with this one! Use as many traits and their inverses as you wish! This tip really helps a lot (speaking with experience)!

3. BACKSTORY:

Probably the most important part of making a character. Everyone has a backstory. You. Me. Most importantly, your character. Backstories as just significant events that alter the mindset of your character. It can range from something minimal to something grave. It could be a cup of coffee or it could be a traumatic experience. The experience could be personal or they could have been an observer; anything works as long as it affects them and hits their weak spot.

The following questions are important to frame a backstory:

• how does your character think?

• what is their moral code? are they in the black zone, the white zone, or the grey zone?

• what are their emotional fears? how do they deal with them?

• what is their level of emotional maturity? do they have any form of issues (trust, attachment, etc)?

• how was their childhood? how were the parents? how were the sibling, the relatives or family friends?

• was their school/college life good? did they have any life-altering experiences?

• what kind of friend circle do they have?

Answering these questions will help you get to know your character even better. Thus, making it easier for you to create your character for your readers.

4. THEIR EMOTIONAL ENVIRONMENT:

Your character has a family, or doesn't. Maybe they're an orphan, or grew up in a foster home. Evaluate what type of effect that may have on your character. Was the foster family abusive thus making your character too shy and timid? Or was life as an orphan so difficult that they learnt to be hyper-independent?

Include their friend circle in this. What type of friends do they have? Are they friends with the good kids? Or the bad kids? Or is it a mixed group? If it's a mixed group, then further focus on how the differences in opinions has an influence on your character. Use your character's emotional surrounding to build their functioning.

If you've come this far, thank you! Do let me know if these tips seem helpful/have helped you!

- Ashlee.

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eustasskiddsprosthetic · 4 months

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Hey, remember when I said I shipped Lawlulaw? Yeah, I finally have an idea for them!

As I was fleshing this out, I suddenly felt the need to shove in Acelaw and Sabolaw in there so uh that's fun. I wanted this to be Lulaw centered but the moments of Ace and Sabo can be very easily spun into a romantic direction if I wanted and I wanted to be open to having a Law harem!

Welp, anyways, onto the plot I cooked. Edit: I elaborated more on this au here (x)!

I'm thinking of Law as a scientist who studies marine life. He has a huge lab where he collects specimens and spends a lot of time sketching out the intricate details and labelling them. He loves drawing these because it helps him get a clear, objective view of the world. His ultimate goal is to know just what makes the world tick.

He wants to know the inner workings of everything, kind of to compensate for how he barely knows himself and the depths of his subconscious nature. He believes everything has a place. A creature's ever part, every organ, every component is like a gear that keeps the whole system running and Law loves analysing them.

It may or may not be surprising but he actually believes in things like monsters, aliens and cryptids. From his experience, there's so many interesting sea creatures within the realm of science. It seemed a bit rude to dismiss the possibility. You never fucking know.

So that means when he sees a merman washed up one day in front of the beach near his home. He shrugs and says, "Well, he looks better than a drunk Bepo."

From indifference turned curiosity, Law squats down and starts poking this merman with a bit too much force and said merman jolts awake. Law notices how sharp his teeth and claws were. Law knew he would die if he did not approach him correctly.

"H-hello. I'm Law. Are you okay?"

The merman was visibly confused. Law realised he seemed a bit dehydrated and realised his gills on his neck looked uncomfortable. Law understood. He pointed to the ocean behind the merman.

"I'll take you back," Law said. He did not know how to approach the situation beyond rolling up his sleeves just in case the merman had an allergic reaction to his shirt and very gently trying to carry the creature princess-style.

Law was horrified to feel that this creature was heavy and struggled with carrying him. So much for wanting to be brave. The merman did not do anything to make things difficult—Law just was not the strongest out there. He just stared at Law with literal stars in his eyes. He made a cheerful little sound that was admittedly quite cute.

Law let the merman go when he was just around waist-deep in the ocean. He gently poured some water over his gills, which elicited even more happy sounds. When Law let go, the merman suddenly looked sad and Law felt like a horrible human being.

"Good bye. Take care"

The merman was swimming rather freely in the ocean now and he circled around Law. Law felt anxious. Did he walk into a trap? Was the merman going to attack? The merman did not seem hostile but you never know what these creatures were thinking especially when they were alive.

When the merman stopped swimming, Law took a good look at his features. He was quite cute in the face with large round eyes and an equally large mouth that occasionally broke into a large smile. If he were human, Law would've fallen in love.

"Good bye, it was nice meeting you-"

The next thing Law knew, he was immediately submerged underwater. He could barely breathe and felt himself choke. Meanwhile the merman was giggling like this was all very amusing. Law was knew he would die, if not for something rapidly swimming up and forcibly dragging the merman away.

Of course it was another muscular merman. He looked older than Law's murderer and had dark red accents on his hands and neck. There were spots on his face that looked like freckles. Now this one looked predatory. In human terms, he looked like he was nagging the other merman. Irritated, Law stood up as best he could and punched them both on the head.

Law's murderer seemed annoyed and sad at the violence, while the other one looked mildly impressed. He whistled through his gills. At least Law knew what that meant—it was a fucking mating call.

"Shut the fuck up! You're both annoying me! Go away!"

The black-haired mermen tilted their head to the side at the same time. In the distance, a pale, almost albino merman swam closer. Unlike the other two, he seemed friendlier even with a heavily disfigured face. He laughed as he happily said, "I'm sorry for my brothers, bastard!"

Law was flabbergasted. This was not his day.

"You can talk?"

The blonde merman seemed more surprised than Law. Law would punch him too but he was much faster than the other two in grabbing them by the shoulders and swimming some distance away so they would have to shout at each other. Law's murderer seemed sad that they were separated.

"You can talk, human?" The merman replied. He laughed. "Bitch!" He seemed to say those vulgarities with great childlike amusement. Though, Law would not be surprised to hear that he knew what those words meant and meant them sincerely. He seemed cunning.

Law felt wet, disgusting and thoroughly upset that he did not die. "Why, yes I fucking can! Piss off!"

As Law made his way back to the base, he suddenly heard the blonde merman tell the pervert and his murderer something. They went silent when Law looked back. Three seconds later, they started making loud, hysterical noises.

For God's sake, Law walked away with a ruined morning, wet clothes and the horrible memory of nearly dying. That was annoying, as he walked up the ocean where he was comfortably knee-length. He felt something gently grab his foot.

"What do you want, murderer?"

The merman pouted slightly and fuck isn't that just the cutest thing? He tried to pull Law back but gently this time. Law realised this was kind of like a child trying to make friends. He sighed and squatted down again to meet this creature at eye-level.

"I won't go with you but I'll come back tomorrow morning. Don't pull that shit again, or I'll kill all three of you. Understood?"

That seemed to be what the merman wanted for he smiled brightly and made those happy clicking noises again. He hugged Law's shoulders, licked his cheek quickly, jumped off and swam off with his brothers who seemed more interested in this little guy more than anyone else.

The sight was sweet. Maybe tomorrow morning would be better...

(Also, Law read up on Merfolk. Apparently, they were acknowledged to be legitimate sea creatures only three years ago and there were proper laws to forbid the act of hunting and killing them. Law found it strange that policies viewed them more like an endangered species than human beings.)

(More importantly, Law found out that there were some highly intelligent merfolk could learn human languages. And even more importantly, merfolk use their saliva to mark their territory... Including their mates, whom they usually commit to for life... Huh.)

#trafalgar law #monkey d luffy #lulaw #revolutionary sabo #sabolaw #portgas d ace #listen I saw like (1) fan art of merman Luffy and now I'm suddenly very interested in the idea #idk bro but asl+Law harem is something that needs to be explored more #sabo saying bitch with his whole chest made me laugh so much #jacqueline's merman au

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pocket-deer-boy · 2 months

Note

can you maybe help me understand something please?

i don’t quite understand how TME/TMA terminology is helpful. anyone can be a victim of transmisogyny.

you can’t say cis women are TME because not all cis women are. they could be mistake for a trans women. especially cis women of color.

you can’t say cis or trans men are TME for the same reasons.

not everybody fits in the boxes of TME or TMA. i don’t understand how those are helpful terms.

this is not meant to be rude in any way, i’m just confused.

Ok so this is kinda messy and shitty but whatever i’ll bite.

First, yes, anyone can have transmisogyny targeted at them, mistakenly or not. I like to compare it to ableism. Anyone can experience transmisogyny, but when you’re TMA transmisogyny is specifically inescapable. There is nothing you could do to escape being a victim of it short of denouncing your whole transition. I’ve been mistaken for a woman before and catcalled under the assumption that i am a woman, those are sticky situations to be in if you’re a queer man. But these situations are easily avoided by being more visibly masculine for me. If you’re a trans woman, this means going back into the closet, or even detransitioning to avoid this danger. That’s obviously completely unrealistic and insulting if you’re transfem.

Similarly, anyone can be inconvenienced by structural ableism when a building doesn’t have an elevator or ramps. However, the building would be specifically hostile and unusable towards people with wheelchairs. The difference is in wether you’re a target of exclusion or violence vs. simply momentarily inconvenienced by its presence. I.e. if someone says something transmisogynistic towards me i could still say in full confidence that i am a man, and that might buy me some safety. The person might apologize, saying they were confused or something. A trans woman would be misgendering herself in doing so. If there’s no elevator in the building and i’m carrying heavy groceries, i could still walk up the stairs. It might be heavy and inconvenient for me, but a wheelchair user couldn’t get up even under normal conditions.

They aren’t entirely cleanly defined boxes of course! But they are useful categories for discussing differences in how transfems get treated differently, in the intersection of being both perceived as a woman and also in being trans. It’s been compared to misogynoir, a term used to describe how black femmes get treated differently in specific ways from black men or white women. But i’m sure misogynoir still hits different if you’re mixed black, different people may experience it differently.

Similarly there’s some degree of ambiguity to who is and isn’t TMA from my understanding? But the primary targets of transmisogyny are obviously people who like, transitioned towards femininity. You know? The people who are gestured towards when people make man in dress caricatures. I don’t think cis women fall into that category, except maybe if you’re intersex, but i’ll bare my ass and admit that’s not something i know much about.

In short, the terms TME and TMA are helpful because a lot of the time, people who are queer or even trans still fall for rhetoric (i am not wholly immune to this i’ll admit that) that paints trans women as either hypersexual predators or unserious hysterics, and it’s useful for people who are victims of this specific type of bigotry to have names for the people most likely to by all means be queer inclusive of everyone but trans women.

#transmisogyny

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yourdeepestfathoms · 9 months

Text

a Pathologic tier list based on how good of an adult the characters are to Clara, a child

this is based on P1, but the tier list site i was using only had the P2 models!

i was meant to have longer, more in-depth explanations, but then i got lazy 😅 so i just have some basic reasoning!

also i haven’t replayed the Changeling route in a few months, so i’m going off of memory!

Actually A Kind, Considerate Adult To A Stressed and Traumatized Child

Lara- Lara is hands down the best adult in this entire game. She’s kind, understanding, and patient with Clara. She never insults her, and even when Clara is being a bit snooty, she still treats her gently. She also literally has a line where she points out that Clara is a child struggling with an immense burden. She calls attention to the fact that she’s just a kid, which NOBODY ELSE DOES.

“Poor thing, I’m so sorry for you. I wouldn’t want to carry your burden.”

It can kinda be read as pity, but pity is better than the cruelty and ignorance to her situation most of the others give her.

Also she has the one voice like where she’s like, “Poor child, she’s so tired” in reference to Clara.

Lara stays winning fr fr

The Tragedians and Executors- Idk if these guys can count, but they’re here anyway. They’re always so nice to Clara, calling her little pet names and explaining stuff to her in a kind way. They talk to her like how adults talk to young children, which she is. And it’s wild how these bitches beat THE ENTIRETY OF THE WHOLE CAST, minus Lara.

A Good Adult

Oyun- I actually cannot believe this guy is this high.

Surprisingly, he’s actually pretty nice to Clara. If not nice, then very respectful. He treats her like a queen.

Rubin- He’s chill with her 👍 (if i remember correctly)

Yulia- Similar to Rubin, she’s chill toward Clara, minus, I think, one little offhand comment that’s kind of rude. But compared to what some of the bitches below say to her, it may as well be a compliment.

Decent But Has Their Moments

Artemy- So, I feel like Artemy is very neutral toward Clara. There is that part in the Changeling route where he sends her a letter where he threatens to kill her, BUT that only happens if you rat out his location to Daniil, so it’s not a set event that always happens.

He speaks to her very curtly, and you can get the sense that he’s probably annoyed by her presence, but he’s not outwardly verbally abusing her unlike others.

If this were a ranking based on P2 interactions, however, he would be WAY LOWER because jfc, he is SO MEAN to Clara.

Daniil- So, he was actually lower at first, but then I saw some really good posts talking about how he cares for Clara in his own way (giving her money, keeping her in the Stillwater, worrying over her)—even if they are a little unconventional.

However, that doesn’t erase the fact that he is still pretty awful to her at times. I mean, he literally threatens to kill her twice, one of which happened when he first met her.

I love the “Daniil is a reluctant father figure to Clara” so much, but I also don’t think he would be any higher than this.

Also, like Artemy, if this were for interactions in P2, he would absolutely be lower.

Neutral

Olgimsky- I think he and Clara talk exactly two (2) times, and both interactions are short and don’t really do anything for the story (if i remember correctly). Also I don’t think they give af about each other at all.

Bad Grief- Neutral. I could have put him higher, actually. He seemed actually kind of nice.

Eva- Same with Bad Grief. Her interaction with Clara wasn’t hostile at all.

Victor- I’ll be real with y’all- I don’t remember them talking 😭

Not A Good Adult

Maria- She’s my second favorite character in the whole game (just behind Clara ofc), but even I can’t deny how cruel she is to Clara. She is SO MEAN.

Aspity- I actually had no idea where to put her. At first, she was in the “decent” section, but that didn’t seem right. Then she was in “Neutral,” but that didn’t seem right, either. Finally, I just decided to put her here. Because, looking back on their interactions, they were pretty hostile.

I don’t think Aspity liked Clara. A lot of the things she said to Clara were either vaguely threatening or directly threatening.

Anna Angel- She was so rude to Clara in the Haruspex route when Clara came running to her house, crying, on Day 6. Also I remember her making shots at Clara often.

Georgiy- Literally threatened to kill Clara the moment he met her. Enough said.

Mark- I remember this bitch ass being snappy with her. Which is good enough for me.

Vlad Jr.- This dude isn’t necessarily mean, but I do remember him being weirdly fanatical toward Clara. He spoke to her like she wasn’t a child but rather someone to be idolized.

Peter- He also wasn’t rude, but I just felt very uncomfortable every time he talked to her. He didn’t speak to her like a child but rather an adult. And yeah, a lot of people did that, but he was just so creepy to me. He acted like she was a goddess or something. It really rubbed me the wrong way.

Block- This may be a bit of an unpopular opinion, but I just can’t put this guy anywhere but here.

Yes, he was kind to her, but he also idolized her, which is just…Not Very Good. Also he fully tries to bring her to war?? If you say no when he first makes the offer, he literally ignores her and keeps going on about it which is a huge red flag.

Horrible Fucking Person

Andrey- I can’t stand this guy. Y’all don’t understand how deep my hatred for him goes. But this spot isn’t even a biased decision he is, SO CRUEL. The way he screams in Clara’s face when she went to his bar?? And yeah, he’s kinda right in some sense, she isn’t old enough to fully understand what she’s doing, but that is not her fault in any way. The blame should fall upon Katerina for making her run around indoctrinating people, not her. And he shouldn’t have yelled at a little girl, spewing insults at her, because at that point, his argument is meaningless when it directly attacks her.

He’s terrible. I hate him.

What The Fuck Is Wrong With You

Aglaya- Basically every word she spoke to Clara felt like a shotgun blast to the chest and had my jaw on the FLOOR. I was not expecting the sheer disgust and hatred she had toward this child.

As such, I have compiled a short list of some of the things she said to Clara:

1. Calls her a “dim, pathetic creature”

2. Calls her insane and deranged

3. Accuses her of having a split personality disorder and being schizophrenic

4. “Prohibits her from existing”

5. Says she has to leave the town or else she’ll have her executed

Among other stuff.

Obligatory “Awful Parents” Spot

The Saburovs- I could go on about how horrible these guys are. Not even just as people, but as parents, too.

The neglect, the exploitation, the abuse, the total disregard for Clara’s feelings when she comes back traumatized while carrying a severed head, the way she’s used to inaugurate people into a religion…

They are truly awful people, and they do not deserve Clara.

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meiliarotten · 1 year

Text

Doppelt

🔞MINORS DNI🔞

Pairing: Medic x Fem!Reader

Summary: Reader stumbles upon Medic in the aftermath of an experiment gone wrong, and is almost immediately down to get it on with the results. Aka, there wasn’t enough Second Opinion material in the tf2 tags, so I made it myself, and I made it horny.

Tags: Praise, degradation, Second Opinion, dom/sub, voice kink, spanking, brief choking, reader is down bad (does this count as a threesome?)

Word Count: 5.3k

The Masterlist

The first thing you noticed as you entered the infirmary was how dark it was. The lights weren’t off, but they were dimmed to the point that you had to pause to let your eyes adjust. Something immediately seemed off. You were so used to the place being lit up with harsh surgical lights, and this abrupt change was eerie, to say the least.

Luckily, you spotted Medic quickly, turned away from you at the opposite wall of the room. The doors to the room closed behind you and the noise caught his attention. You were about to greet him, but the words caught in your throat.

At a glance, you wouldn’t have noticed anything in the darkness, but as you stared at Medic’s face for a few more moments you could tell something was off. In the little light that was available, the first thing you noticed was a row of something metallic running down the center his face- were those staples ?

Then your eyes finally adjusted. On one side of the staples was Medic, looking the same as usual. On the other side was, well, still him, but something was wrong. The grey tinged pallor or the clouded, pure white eye were frightening enough. There was also the expression, somehow contained to only the discolored half of the face, that indicated something more menacing, something that you didn’t recognize as the Medic you knew.

Your first instinct was, of course, to scream. Medic was upon you before you had the chance. A hand was clamped over your mouth to muffled any noises you made into barely audible gibberish.

“Quiet!”

The order was short and curt. It sounded like Medic, but at the same time so very unlike him. The usual joviality that his voice carried, even in the most dire of situations, was gone. What replaced it was a deep, humorless, and threatening tone that made your blood run cold upon hearing it.

You watched as Medic shook his head, as if to clear his thoughts. When he looked at you, he seemed to have regained his senses, a nervous smile replacing the grimace that he had worn when he had seized you.

“I’m sorry dear, I just couldn’t have the others finding out. It would just cause more trouble. In fact…” Medic slowly removed his hand from your mouth. It took everything in you not to scream again. He then made his way over to the infirmary doors, and locked them. You tried not to let the panic show on your face when he turned back to you.

“There, now no one else will stumble upon this little scientific mishap,” he concluded, clapping his hands together and wringing them nervously. You didn’t like that. If the doctor was nervous, then you definitely had a reason to be nervous as well.

“Medic?” You said hesitantly.

“Yes liebling?” Medic responded, sounding as cheerful as ever despite his anxious body language.

“I don’t understand. What is this?” You asked, struggling to find the words that sounded the least rude while simultaneously trying to calm your racing heartbeat. “What did you do?”

“Oh, right. This,” he said, motioning vaguely to himself. He sounded so casual, as if you had just asked how the weather was. “Well, love-”

“I don’t imagine you would understand.”

You were taken aback at the return of that chilling voice, and especially by the hostility that it conveyed. Medic, oddly enough, looked taken aback as well, seeming to regain his senses after a few seconds.

“Sshh! Hush!” He muttered to himself, before looking back at you apologetically. “Ach, sorry dear. Although, he is right. It is rather difficult to explain- say, you’ve heard of Jekyll and Hyde, right?”

“Yes,” you said, baffled at where this conversation could possibly be leading.

“Of course, everyone has,” Medic said, rolling his eyes at the redundancy of his previous question. “Well, to give a brief explanation-”

And that was where you stopped understanding a single word that Medic said. You were bombarded with scientific jargon mixed with supernatural phenomena, neither of which you had ever heard of until now. Honestly, you probably could have gone your whole life without hearing of it. It felt like ages by the time he was done, and you were just left staring at him, thoroughly dumbfounded.

“Understand now?” He asked, apparently not noticing your blank stare as he finally finished his ‘brief explanation.’

“Um, sure.”

It wasn’t entirely a lie. You understood the basic concept; Medic, through some wayward experiment, had created a new personality, possibly an entirely new being, apart from himself, yet also a part of himself. How you were meant to take this new development, you had no idea.

“Perfect! Now, to figure out how to reverse this…” he said, tapping his fingers thoughtfully on the nearby surgical table.

“You have a way to reverse it?” You asked.

“He has no such thing. And he will never find any such thing.”

God, that voice. Now armed with a general understanding of the situation, it didn’t scare you as much. It startled you, yes, but you weren’t outright frightened. It did something else to you too. Something you considered suppressing. It felt wrong, to look at this crime against nature and think; ‘wow, that’s actually kinda hot.’

Medic, meanwhile, was oblivious to your reaction, once again apologizing for his other half.

“Gottverdammt. Sorry, I’m still getting used to controlling that ,” he motioned towards the paler half of his face. “And to answer your question, no. I don’t have a way to reverse this. Not yet anyway! But I will get to work on it soon enough!”

Medic’s eyes lit up, and he looked at you, grinning. You noticed how it didn’t quite stretch from ear to ear, as if the other half wouldn’t allow it.

“In fact, perhaps you could help! If you could just-“

You perked up, awaiting his directions when the other half overtook Medic once again. You jumped as the voice returned.

“We don’t need this schlampe here distracting us. We have work to do. Real work-“

“Gott, won’t you be quiet? And there’s no need to throw around insults like that!” And just as soon as it appeared, it was silenced. Medic continued to berate his other half, but you barely heard it.

Schlampe. You weren’t sure what it meant, but you assumed from his tone, and Medic’s reaction that it was far from positive. Probably something demeaning and degrading- so why did you feel so enticed by it?

“Hello? Dear?” You snapped back to attention at the sound of Medic’s voice and a hand waving in front of your face.

“Sorry, what was that?” You asked.

“I asked if you were alright. You really shouldn’t let his words get to you,” he said, offering a reassuring smile. “Honestly, I didn’t expect him to turn out so uncivil. All animalistic instinct and no class whatsoever.”

Well, that did nothing to quell your interest. You looked at Medic, taking in his new appearance for a second time. You didn’t doubt that Medic would find a way to rid himself of this alternate personality if he really wanted to. It occurred to you that you had a once in a lifetime opportunity on your hands.

“Oh, I’m perfectly fine. In fact,” you took a deep breath. It was now or never. “He can say whatever he wants about me.”

You closed the distance between you and Medic, your tone dropping into something more suggestive. You fixed him with a look, glancing up at him through your lashes. He didn’t seem to catch your meaning.

“Oh nein, my dear! I won’t simply stand here and let him disgrace you,” his clear eye darted towards the other half of his face with a glare. “You don’t deserve that.”

You barely kept yourself from rolling your eyes as you realized Medic wasn’t receiving any of the signals you were throwing his way.

“Maybe I do deserve it,” you whispered, running your fingers tentatively along the edge of Medic’s shirt collar.

“What? Liebling-“

You cut him off with a kiss, officially done with dropping hints. He made a startled noise before instinctively kissing back, his arm wrapping around your waist to pull you closer. When the two of you finally pulled apart, Medic was left panting and confused.

“I don’t understand-“ he began, only to be cut off once again, “Dummkopf, she wants us to fuck her. Isn't that right, schatz?”

The pet name was spoken with such venom, spat out as if it was an insult. That, paired with the vulgarity that you rarely heard from the doctor, sent a shiver down your spine. Still, you managed to look bold and self assured as you responded.

“Yes, that’s right,” you said, confidently.

His hand took you roughly by the face, tilting your chin up to look him in the eyes.

“Yes, who?”

“Yes sir,” you said, your voice trembling slightly. You took another deep breath, lowering your gaze in a gesture of submission. Medic’s grip on you loosened and once again a bemused expression came over him.

“You’re absolutely sure you want this ?” he asked, gesturing to himself.

“Yes,” you dropped the submissive tone, speaking matter of factly. “I promise, I’m sure. And I’ll tell you if I want to stop.”

“I can handle him. If you want this to end, I can end it. Just call for me,” Medic said, his hand coming to rest on your cheek.

“I know,” you said, smiling and leaning into his touch.

“Well then,” Medic began, a wicked grin spreading across his face, “Enough stalling.”

He backed away for a moment, looking you up and down and walking around you in a tight circle. You followed him with your eyes. Despite the grin, he almost looked dismissive, as if he is considering whether or not you warranted his attention.

Finally he stopped in front of you, reached out and again tilted your chin upward to look at him. He was firm, but surprisingly gentle, for now.

“I think if you truly want this, mädchen, you should work for it. Don’t you agree?”

You nodded, not speaking unless you were given permission to do so. Despite the lack of any verbal response, he still seemed to sense your eagerness as his grin grew wider.

“Then let’s not waste any time,” he said, placing his hands on your shoulders and pushing you down to your knees somewhat roughly. You froze momentarily, startled by the sudden force. However, you were quickly brought back to reality by a hand on your scalp, one that wasted no time taking a fist full of your hair in a tight grip.

“I trust that you're smart enough to know what you’re supposed to do now?” He asked condescendingly. He tugged your hair slightly, making you whimper.

“Of course, sir,” you whispered as you took action, unzipping his pants. He was already half hard. You stroked him to full mast, getting a good look at what you would be dealing with.

Like the rest of his body, it was split down the center. You cringed at the thought of how painful that must have been. That was followed almost immediately by amusement at the fact that during this whole morbid experiment, Medic had apparently taken the time to include this specific detail. Perhaps he had predicted the possibility that you might take a little too much interest in his altered body.

You took solace in the fact that the staples here were smaller. They were also much smoother and more rounded than the ones that ran up the rest of his body. They almost looked like piercings, and you imagined they would make for some pleasant sensations later on. Again, you wondered if Medic had planned for this.

A growl and another rough tug at your hair let you know that you were spending a little too much time admiring. It was about time you got to work. Tentatively, you opened your mouth and took in as much as you could, using your hand to grasp any remaining length.

You tasted metal as you ran your tongue over the staples. You wondered if they were especially sensitive. Apparently, they were, as you managed to draw the most sultry sounds from Medic when you paid them special attention. You glanced up, seeing him panting as he held your hair. He grinned down at you before pulling your head back.

“Stop.”

Immediately, you obeyed, albeit with a disappointed whine. You had rather enjoyed seeing Medic nearly coming undone for you. He laughed softly at your reaction.

“We don’t want to come yet, liebling. And you are so very talented with that mouth of yours,” Medic said, his normal tone returning for a moment. He finally loosened his grip on your hair, and tucked himself back into his pants begrudgingly, his erection still straining. You gasped as he suddenly took hold of your shoulders. “Just like a proper little whore.”

He was upon you quicker than you thought was possible. You were pushed to the floor, powerful arms pinning you to the blood freckled tile. A shiver ran up your spine, making your whole body shudder in anticipation.

“Look at you, trembling. Are you scared, hm? Are you afraid?” He teased, leaning down to whisper in your ear. You felt his lips brush against you.

“Don’t be scared, liebling,” Medic said, running a hand under your shirt to massage your chest. ”We’re going to make you feel so good.”

His other hand found its way to the waistband of your pants, pulling them down roughly followed quickly by your underwear. Your face flushed as you heard him chuckle at how obviously soaked you were.

“Already so wet, just from servicing me with your mouth?” He said, still laughing softly as he ran a finger against your entrance, making you gasp. His other hand stopped kneading your breast, moving lower to rest on your hip.

You moaned as you felt him slide a single finger into you, followed soon by a second. He made a point to just barely stroke your g-spot, making you whimper. You tried to buck your hips forward, only for him to hold your hips still with his unoccupied hand.

He made a point to neglect your clit as well, deliberately trying to keep any gratification just slightly out of reach. He seemed to revel in your desperate whines, but you were quickly running out of patience. You felt him loosen his grip on your hips slightly, and in an act of desperation, you tried to buck against him again, trying to make him go deeper.

In return, you were met with a hand wrapped around your throat with surprising speed. The pressure wasn’t enough to restrict air flow. Hell, it was barely enough to restrict blood flow, but you still felt a thrill run through you as his fingers squeezed into the sides of your neck.

“Squirming alone won’t get you what you want. Use your words, liebling.”

His voice sent a chill down your spine, but you still managed to respond, albeit stammering, “I want more.”

“Go on,” he said, encouraging you to be more specific.

“I want you to go deeper and harder, please! Please sir!” You pleaded, aching for release. His hand fell away from your throat.

“That’s it, beg for me,” he sounded pleased, finally rubbing his thumb over your clit as he curled his fingers perfectly within you.

“Yes! Fuck, please keep going,” you begged, afraid that if you stopped he would stop as well.

“Such a good girl, moaning and pleading just for me,” he growled, his lips brushing your ear again, this time coupled with the grazing of teeth, bared in a feral grin.

You felt yourself approaching orgasm faster than expected. Your legs trembled as you tried to hold back, wanting this to go on for longer.

“So close after so little time?” He asked, stroking his free hand over one of your quivering thighs. You nodded, unable to answer verbally as anything you tried to say would just come out as another shaky moan.

“You really were aching for this, weren’t you mädchen?” He mused, and once again you only nodded and whimpered in response.

“Poor, pathetic little thing. Go on, come for me. Let it go,” he said, roughly running his thumb over your clit a few more times. That was enough to push you over the edge.

You came hard, riding out your orgasm on his fingers, which continued to curl delightfully inside you. You made for quite the view, shaking and moaning on the tile floor as you got the release you craved.

“So beautiful.” Medic murmured as he watched the scene before him, eyes alight with lust. “You’re so gorgeous when you come undone for me, my good girl.”

“I want to see even more.”

The vaguely menacing tone in which that last sentence was spoken barely registered in your mind before you felt Medic begin to stroke you again. He had only given you moments to recover from your previous orgasm. Still being very sensitive, it didn’t take you long to reach a second climax.

Still, he didn’t stop.

“Let’s see just how much you can take, dear,” he growled, sending a jolt of tantalizing fear through you.

You let him repeatedly bring you over the edge. Sometimes it was surprisingly quick, other times he had to work for several minutes. Each one was followed by a similar mantra of, “Surely you could go for one more?”

You were exhausted, clinging onto his words as if they were the only thing keeping you grounded.

“Such a lovely view, seeing you beneath me with your eyes rolled back like that,” he said, leaning down until you felt his breath against your neck. Then you felt his teeth, starting as a simple graze against your collar before turning to a genuine bite. You yelped at the unexpected sensation. The pain, combined with the overpowering pleasure sent your head spinning.

“Oh, you’re tearing up now. Does it feel that good?” He asked as he continued to rub your clit. “That’s right, just let the pleasure overwhelm you…”

It certainly did overwhelm you. He was right, tears were pricking at the back of your eyes as you felt another orgasm overtake you. The constant stimulation, his filthy words, the strange mix of discomfort and pleasure, it was all becoming too much.

“Medic!”

You practically sobbed as you called his name, desperate for a break from the tortuous pleasure. Almost immediately you were wrapped up in his arms. He held you as you whined and rode out the aftershocks of a final release. Was it the sixth? The seventh? You had lost count.

“Hush mein liebling, I’ve got you,” Medic whispered, stroking your back and holding you close to his body until you finally stopped trembling.

“I’m sorry,” you stammered when you finally caught your breath. “It was just so much. I needed a moment.”

“Don’t apologize. Everything is alright,” he reassured you, pulling back slightly to look at your face, still slightly flushed. Thankfully, you were already starting to calm down, as you managed to offer a small smile in response.

“Do you need anything?” Medic asked. You shook your head.

“No, I’m alright now,” you said, already sounding more collected than you had been a few moments ago. “I think I’m ready to go on.”

“Go on?” Medic sounded incredulous, as if he couldn’t believe you still had more desire left in you.

“Yeah, I just needed a moment to collect myself,” you said. “I still want to see this go a bit further, if it’s okay with you, of course.”

You looked up at Medic, waiting for his answer. He looked down at you in disbelief, but he seemed willing to continue.

“As long as you’re sure,” he said tentatively, allowing a soft smile to return to his face.

“I’m sure,” you said before letting yourself fall back into that obedient, docile mindset of someone all too willing to be ordered around. “Please, I want you to fuck me.”

“Very well…” you heard the gentleness in his tone begin to ebb away, and you smiled in anticipation.

Again, a devilish grin spread across his face. You couldn’t help but notice how it seemed to pull upward more at the pale greyish hued half of Medic’s face. You wondered if you would eventually be able to tell which one was in control just by studying the face. But there were more important things to concentrate on right now.

“Be a good girl for me, and get onto the table, mädchen,” He said, nodding his head towards the metal operating table in the center of the room.

You obeyed without hesitation, hoisting yourself up into the cold surface. Realizing you were still wearing your top, you decided to remove it, discarding it along with your other clothing.

“Good. Now kneel there, on all fours, like a good little hündchen,” he growled, approaching the table slowly and watching you with a look that reminded you of a ravenous wolf.

Still, you complied. Thankfully the surgical table was large, and you were able to keep your balance easily, even in this pose. You watched as Medic made his way behind you. You tried to turn your head to see him, only to be met with a hand gripping your hair, forcing you to look ahead.

“Eyes forward. No looking yet,” he said, his voice commanding obedience. “Don’t make me blindfold you.”

The grip on your hair softened, actually turning into a soft petting motion, indicating that the gentler side had taken over for a moment. You hummed contently as he brushed his hands down your back.

“You’re irresistible like this, presenting so nicely for me,” Medic said. You could practically hear the smile in his voice. You gasped softly when you felt a finger brush along your still sensitive entrance. You shuffled back on the table until you were right on the edge of the metal, allowing him unhindered access to your body.

“And still so wet from earlier,” Medic admired, leaning over to speak right in your ear. “Schöne schlampe. You’re so eager for me to take you.”

“Yes, yes please!” You begged, making the mistake of glancing behind you. The grip on your hair quickly returned, forcing you to turn away again.

“Where did I tell you to keep your eyes, kleiner hund?”

“I’m sorry sir,” you said, shuddering as his voice deepened slightly.

“That wasn’t an answer, schatz,” he warned, tugging your hair a bit harder, just enough to make you whine.

“You told me to keep my eyes forward,” you stammered.

“That’s right.”

You yelped at the swift smack on your ass. You were more startled by the harsh sound than by the pain. Honestly, part of you expected this, and maybe even looked forward to this. You moaned as you felt his hands knead the supple flesh that he had struck.

“Gott liebling, you sound so beautiful,” Medic said, sounding in awe. It boosted your ego just a bit, and in a moment of boldness, you moved your ass up against Medic’s groin, tempting him to either spank you again, or do something a bit more invasive .

“Please,” you whispered, your voice low. You wished you could turn around and flash him a sultry glance to tempt him even further.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” You felt a pair of hands clutch your waist, the nails digging in and making you whimper.

“Sir!” You gasped, realizing your mistake. “Please, sir!”

“Good fraulein”

Another strike on your ass made you cry out. You delighted in the conflicting sensations, relishing the pain and the rush of adrenaline that came with it.

“Do you want more?” His voice sent shivers up your spine yet again. You were practically trembling. “You want it harder, ja? You’re enjoying your punishment, enjoying everything we do to you, like a good little schlampe.”

He laughed, his grip once again moving to your waist. You were pulled even closer to him, just barely keeping your balance on the edge of the table. You could feel the rumble of his laughter, and, more importantly, his erection against your backside. With a sly grin, you grinded against him, eliciting a deep growl.

“Tempting us, are you?” He asked, sounding slightly breathy. You could tell he was struggling to restrain himself from fucking you into the table then and there. It wouldn’t be long now.

“You want this, mädchen?” He unzipped his fly, and took hold of his cock, pressing it against your slit but not entering yet. You felt him lean over, breath hot against your ear, words coming out in animalistic growls.

“Then show me how much you want it. Beg.”

“Please! I want you to fuck me,” you cried.

“Tell me how much you want it.”

“I want it so fucking badly. I want it so much! God, please!”

Your cries were cut off by a dark chuckle. You heard it as much as felt it, the soft rumble in his chest, as he was still leaning over you.

“Well, how could I deny such a desperate little schlampe?”

You felt him line up and enter you quickly from behind, a position that made it easy for him to thrust deep and hard into you with little hindrance.

Pressing your face into the cold metal of the table, you moaned as he pounded you mercilessly. You held onto the edges of the table in a white knuckled grip, trying to keep yourself steady.

Medic’s moans were animalistic, making you feel like prey at his mercy. You loved every minute of it. You even managed to sneak a few glimpses of him behind you, his eyes narrow with concentration.

You stayed in that position for a few minutes longer until Medic pulled out without warning. Before you could even get a word of complaint out, you were flipped onto your back and quickly thrusted into once again. You cried out in surprise and pleasure, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes at the suddenness of it all.

“I’m sorry mein liebe. I just had to see that pretty face of yours,” Medic moaned, pressing a kiss to your neck and eventually moving up to your lips. You kissed back fervently, enjoying the moment of calm.

It didn’t last long. Medic’s gentler thrusts grew more frantic and familiarly rough, as did the kisses. He trailed his way back down your jawline and returned to your neck. It started with hesitant nips at your sensitive flesh, but it wasn’t long until you were being bit. Teeth marks and bruises began to decorate your neck and collar.

“Do you like that, hündchen?” he growled into the crook of your neck, continuing to mark you up in between his words. He bit down especially hard, as if to claim you. “Mein kleines haustier. You’re all mine.”

“Fuck, yes!” You moaned as his thrusts found that especially sensitive spot inside you, slamming into it repeatedly. If he kept moving like that, you knew you wouldn’t last much longer.

You made no secret of how good he was making you feel, moaning with abandon. It only encouraged him to keep up the pace for as long as he could. You felt him growl against your neck with the effort, his thrusts growing uneven as he approached climax as well.

“Gott liebling, I’m so close,” Medic groaned, gripping the edges of the surgical table as he tried to hold off for just a little longer. “Come for us, mädchen.”

You trembled at the demanding growl that he spoke in. Coupled with the well placed thrusts, it proved to be enough to push you over the edge. You wrapped your legs around Medic’s hips, trembling as you came.

“That's it, let it go, just for us- oh Gott!”

It felt so rewarding to hear that self assured, dominant voice come undone. You listened closely to how it rapidly switched between Medic’s usual moans and those savage, almost inhuman growls. You found both sounds incredibly erotic on there own, and hearing them rapidly vacillate like this was indescribable.

You yelped as his arms suddenly wrapped around you, lifting you upright and holding you against him as you both rode out your orgasms. You relaxed into the gentle rise and fall of his chest, just beginning to come down from your collective high. You were left panting against each other, sweating, and desperately trying to catch your breath.

“Mein schönes mädchen,” he whispered, breathless and thoroughly spent. His eyes were half lidded and he wore a satisfied grin, which you returned in kind.

“That was really good,” you said when you finally caught your breath enough to speak.

“You never cease to surprise me, liebling,” Medic said, a slight laugh in his voice. You smiled at that. Honestly, you surprised yourself with how bold you had been in initiating this in the first place.

You absentmindedly tracing the seam that ran up Medic’s chest. At some point, several top buttons of Medic’s shirt had come undone, exposing the row of staples. Perhaps you could take advantage of their sensitivity more next time.

Oh, wait. Your face dropped momentarily as you forced yourself to come back to reality.

“Um, are you still planning on getting rid of…” you trailed off, motioning generally towards the paler half of his body, as if you could avoid its attention simply by refusing to acknowledge it verbally. Of course, this did not work, and your question was responded to with a harsh laugh.

“I can’t simply be ‘gotten rid of,’ mädchen,” he said, leaning in closer. “Besides, I don’t think you want that, do you? Perhaps you want a second round? Insatiable little-”

He was cut off swiftly with a growl of annoyance from Medic. You tried to hide your disappointment, but then again, you highly doubted you had the strength to go another round anyway.

“Now, that’s enough of that,” Medic muttered, composing himself. “I think we’ve had quite enough for today.”

He looked at the bite marks and small bruises patterning your neck and collarbone, running a hand over them tentatively. You glanced down at the few you could see, wondering how you were going to hide them. Turtle neck sweaters didn’t exactly mingle well with the heat of New Mexico.

But you weren’t going to worry about that now. You looked up expectantly at Medic. You were still waiting for an answer to your question, and he looked deep in thought.

“I’m sorry liebling, but I’m afraid he would simply be a hindrance to my work. Even now I can feel him trying to claw his way to the forefront,” he said, looking at you apologetically.

You sighed. You had gone into this knowing it would probably be a once in a lifetime experience, but you still felt a small pang of disappointment. Then you heard Medic hum to himself. Glancing up at him, you saw that he looked deep in thought, and you knew that meant he wasn’t yet ready to drop the subject himself.

“Then again, I would be lying if I said I didn’t want a repeat performance of this. So maybe- just maybe- we won’t have to be completely rid of him,” he said.

“You could do that?” You asked, trying to figure out the logistics of what Medic was suggesting, not willing to ask him exactly how it could be done. The last thing you wanted was to sit through another scientific lecture.

“Oh ja, if I could just find a way to put him away temporarily, and revive him for occasions like this, it could work,” he mused, half to you, and half to himself. “It would be difficult, but I’m always up for a challenge! And besides-”

He leaned in to whisper in your ear. Whether it was the second personality taking over again, or simply Medic being especially filthy, you weren’t sure. Still, you clung hopefully to every word.

“If it means I get to see you squirm and beg for me like that again, it’s a challenge I’ll gladly accept.”

#medic second opinion #second opinion tf2 #tf2 x reader #medic x reader #tf2 #team fortress medic #team fortress 2 medic #merc x reader #x reader #medic tf2 #tf2 medic #fanfic #fanfiction #smut #tf2 smut #cross posted on ao3 #minors dni

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sashaisready · 6 months

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I'm Still Here - Chapter Two

Lee Bodecker (The Devil All The Time) x Femme Reader

In late 60s Meade, you’re married to Sheriff Bodecker, pregnant with your first child. On paper you’re the perfect couple – the respectable Sheriff and his homemaker wife. This should be one of the happiest times of your life…so why are the two of you living like ghosts? And is it too late to bridge that gap? Especially when your husband is playing a dangerous game.

Series Masterlist

Warnings: whoaaaa that escalated quickly!! Dark themes so please tread carefully - references to martial issues, references to infidelity/cheating thoughts, pregnancy, forced imprisonment and physical violence, some light smut references/breeding kink (hehe), allusions of violence toward a pregnant woman, threats of violence/murder.

Wordcount: 2.4k

Doug, the young bag boy from Denton’s, dutifully stacked the pantry items in the cabinet as you looked on.

“Thanks Doug. You want a sweet tea or anything?” you asked, your voice honeyed.

“No ma’am” he replied sharply, the tone slightly quivering.

You smiled behind his back. Some of the local young men got a little bit like that around you, you being the Sheriff’s wife and all. They didn’t want to do anything that might get back to Lee. That meant some of them froze up entirely, refusing to even engage with you in case the smallest thing could be interpreted as hostile or rude…or worse, flirty. You were like a deer they became perfectly still next to, as if even the slightest move might send you running. It was cute. You knew it was wrong, but you couldn’t help playing with them sometimes.

“You sure? I got some fresh cookies too. You should have some for all your hard work” you teased. “A growing man like you sure needs his calories”.

“N-no ma’am” replied poor, sweet Doug. He put another can in the cabinet and kept his eyes straight forward.

“Well…it means a lot to me” you continued. “Coming all the way out here to help me with my groceries. It’s harder for me to get around now I’m getting bigger”. You added a sigh for dramatic effect.

“Y-yes ma’am” Doug nodded. “N-no trouble. Mr. Denton is happy to help out his loyal customers. And a lady in need, of course”. He fixated on a can of beans as if it contained the meaning of life.

“Well, thank-you. And it’s nice they sent out such a handsome guy, too” you purred seductively.

Doug cleared his throat, his back visibly stiffened as he became flustered. “Uh…thank-thank you, Mrs-Mrs Bodecker”.

Sometimes you wondered if you could have an affair. Maybe it would be fun. You weren’t sure if many men would be open to sneaking around with a pregnant woman, and the Sheriff’s wife at that, but there sure were a lot of horndogs out there too stupid to care. But no. You wouldn’t do that to Lee. You loved the big lug too damn much, even if things weren’t great with him right now.

But that didn’t mean you couldn’t play.

You were about to carry on needling Doug but could practically hear Lee’s exasperated voice in your head. ‘Honey, leave that poor boy alone’.

Sigh. Fair enough. It was less fun when they were this skittish. You would release poor Doug.

“A-anything else you need, ma’am?” he choked out.

“No, that’s all – thank-you Doug. You’ve done a great job”.

You paid the bill, plus gave him a nice tip for his trouble. He rushed out of the door in a flash, the money barely in his hand. You sighed as you felt remorse and guilt flood you, that was mean of you. It’s not his fault you’re bored and stuck. Doug shouldn’t have to suffer because Lee hasn’t touched you in months. Don’t project your bullshit onto him. You don’t hurt people anymore, remember?

You would call Denton later and sing Doug’s praises. Insist on a raise for him, maybe throw Lee’s name around. Lord knows he needed it for working with the people in this town – yourself included.

You checked the wall clock as you rubbed your stomach. Baby gave you a few cursory kicks in response, just checking in. It was barely 11am. So much of the day to go and you were already bored out of your skull. Maybe you’d make yourself an early lunch. Watch a bit of TV. A walk if you felt up to the cooing and bump rubbing from the neighbourhood hens. Then back to chores. Same old, same old. Rinse and repeat.

“Motherfucker…” Lee seethed quietly as Leroy struck him once more.

He bared his teeth, the rage inside him so strong he felt that he could pull the ropes apart with his bare hands. Leroy hit him again, Bobo looked on and smiled.

“I told you, we’re done” Lee growled, spitting a crimson wad onto the concrete ground and pulling on his binds. The chair he was strapped to clanged loudly as the ropes hammered against it.

“I’m out. We’re not doin’ this anymore. I got a kid on the way. I’m going straight”.

Leroy sighed. “You don’t just get to leave, Bodecker” his tone was patronising, mocking. “We have an arrangement. A profitable one, for all of us. You’re really think you can just put in your two weeks’ notice, and we’ll let you go? Leave us high and dry? You can have your rugrat and your money, Sheriff. This doesn’t need to be the end”.

Lee shook his head vehemently. “I told you. I’m done. I’m not doing this anymore. Now you’ve got two choices: you let me go, I walk away – and I leave you alone. I look the other way if I hear about the shit you get up to. But your other choice…”

Leroy simply laughed; Bobo joined in.

“Way I see it, you’re not exactly in a position to bargain” Leroy explained as he leaned over into Lee’s battered face. “How about we make you a deal? We all carry on what we’re doing, and you go home to your pretty little wife, only slightly roughed up…”.

Lee snarled. “Don’t talk about my wife…”

Leroy snorted. “…Or, if you continue your sudden moral crusade…that poor little Bodecker junior grows up without a daddy. And that’s no life for a child”.

Lee’s eyes darkened at the mention of his unborn child. He didn’t even know if he was having a son or a daughter yet, but Leroy wasn’t allowed to speak of them regardless. He wouldn’t get away with this.

The pounding continued, Leroy doing his best to beat Lee into submission and have him ‘forget’ this whole walking away thing. Bobo would tag in occasionally too. They berated him, telling him he had no choice in this matter. But Lee wasn’t stupid. They needed him. Leroy was running scared. His whole operation would collapse without the Sheriff’s involvement, smoothing out the legal lines and distracting any boy scout deputies for them. Yeah, taking his cut had been nice. But enough was enough. He didn’t want to be a dirty cop with an innocent baby back home. A perfect baby that never did nothing wrong, who would grow up needing guidance. A baby who needed an honourable sheriff for a father, not some corrupt asshole taking bribes from scumbags like Leroy and Bobo. It was time to start over, to be good. Not just the baby, but for you as well. Leroy knew damn well it would all collapse once that happened.

Whatever happened, they needed Lee alive. This was all sheer panic.

Lee glanced at the beat-up clock leaning against the rickety desk. Barely 11am. He cursed himself, he had known they weren’t going to take too kindly to his announcement, but he’d underestimated their anger. He was woefully unprepared. Foolish. But there would be time to scold himself later. Now here he was out the back of some storefront, his deputies believing him to out on patrol, his wife thinking he was sorting some land dispute. Nobody knew he was here, so he had to find his own way home.

He winced as he thought of you. He wondered what you were doing right now. Maybe singing to your bump. Baking. Cleaning. He sure as hell hoped you hadn’t gone to the market yourself, but he wouldn’t be surprised if you had. You didn’t exactly have a track record for doing what you were told. He knew that better than anyone.

He had so badly wanted to feel you and the baby this morning, to touch you, connect with you both. But he ran scared. Things had been so weird between the two of you for so long, and he wouldn’t have been able to handle it if you’d recoiled or rejected him. It scared you how little he knew you these days. He never knew what you were thinking, your face a perfect mask – the same one you wore for the rest of the town. But before, he could see underneath. He used to know the very bones of you.

He admitted he’d withdrawn into himself a little as your bump grew. Maybe more than a little. But you had, too. And the truth was he was scared, his father wasn’t around when he was a kid, and he was determined to break the cycle – but he found himself so overwhelmed that he was paralysed by fear. So afraid to get it wrong that he barely acted at all. He knew the irony in this, not acting was still an action. And not the right one. He was eating more, watching his weight creep up as he tried to replace you with candy and junk. But it never tasted as sweet anymore. The two of you had inched further and further away from each other, and he was worried you wouldn’t find your way back. Lee was scared that if he tried to bridge that gap, you’d just push him away even further. It was easier to pretend everything was fine rather than have his worst fears confirmed. Maybe you were having doubts about him. Maybe he wasn’t enough for you. That was his fear when you first got together, too. With how you met and all. He thought he was over it, but it had lurked in the darkness, striking when his defences were down and rearing its ugly head once more. But now it was worse, because maybe it included the baby too.

He knew the night you’d conceived, the math added up, but he also just knew. And God he’d been so proud, he just knew it would take. Something in his soul told him that this was the one, that he’d taken you and claimed you and given you a part of himself to grow and create. The animalistic excitement of marking you and filling you, as nature intended. His beautiful wife becoming even more beautiful, the swell of your stomach would be a show of his virility, his duty as a husband. That idea alone had been what pushed him over the edge, his mouth over yours as he greedily swallowed your moans and filled you entirely with his spend. He’d held you tightly, still seated inside of you. His nose tracing the side of your face as your collective panting stilled. You’d told him you loved him, and he told you he loved you too, that he always had. Always will. How long ago that moment seemed.

Lee was rudely pulled from his thoughts by another smack from Leroy. He groaned slightly at the sting but keep his head up. He wasn’t a great fighter, but he could take one hell of a beating. One thing his daddy gave him, at least.

He blinked up at Leroy and could see the fatigue written all over him. He was worn out. Punching a guy over and over does take its toll. Especially a big one like Lee. Bobo looked pretty exhausted too. Lee felt himself brighten - here was a glimmer of hope he could maybe take advantage of. He could still get himself home to you and baby.

“There’s still time to walk away, Leroy” he spat menacingly. “You’re tired. I’m tired. Just untie me, and let’s go our separate ways and draw a line under our whole damn engagement”.

Leroy scoffed, but Lee heard his small pant of exhaustion - clear as day. Leroy shook his head, glancing at Bobo who stared back anxiously. They were running out of options. Even if they didn’t need Lee, they also didn’t need the heat of killing a Sheriff either. God only knows who might start digging and poking around in their business if they did.

Leroy huffed. “I didn’t want it to come to this, Bodecker, but you leave me no choice…”

He picked up his jacket from the desk and shrugged it on. Bobo, seeming to understand immediately, pulled on his hat in response.

Lee’s eyes narrowed. “And where are you goin’?”

“Sorry Lee” said Bobo almost regretfully as they walked towards the door.

Leroy sighed. “If you’re not going to listen to us, maybe we need to focus our efforts closer to home”.

Lee’s eyes widened. “You better not be suggestin’ what I think you are…” he snarled.

“We need insurance, Sheriff. A sure-fire way to know for certain that you won’t leave us high and dry or do anything stupid. And your wife fits the bill”.

Lee began yelling, screaming. He pulled and pulled on his binds as he used all his strength to try and break free.

“DON’T YOU FUCKIN’ TOUCH HER. SHE’S NOTHIN’ TO DO WITH THIS. SHE’S PREGNANT, YOU SICK SON OF A BITCH!” he howled, stamping his feet fruitlessly against the floor as he did his best to kick out. The anger radiating off him in waves.

“Oh, relax. We ain’t gonna hurt her too bad” chuckled Leroy. “We just need to make it clear who’s in charge here, and what might happen if you have another attack of conscience”.

Through his rage, Lee had a sudden moment of clarity. He needed to calm down to keep you safe. Both of you.

“Alright…Alright. You win.” he managed to puff out as he attempted to regain control of himself. “I don’t quit. I’ll stay. I do whatever you want. Just don’t hurt her. Don’t touch her. Or the baby”.

His voice was desperate. He looked between the two of them, begging for mercy.

Leroy’s jaw clicked. “I’m sorry Bodecker. It’s too late for all that now. We need to be sure you understand”. He smirked mockingly over at Lee and continued towards the door.

Lee let out a deafening roar as he fought, pulling on the ropes so hard he had burns on his fingers.

“I swear to the God almighty, you’ll die in that house, you motherfuckers!” he bellowed.

Leroy just laughed as he and Bobo left the store, leaving an apoplectic Lee in their wake.

As the door slammed, he took a second to steady his breathing. Shaking the sweat beads from his forehead, he took a deep breath and began to methodically tug at the knots of the rope. He would be out of those binds if it was the last thing he did.

“I’m comin’ Honeybee” he muttered. “I’m comin’…”

Soon, he felt one of the knots finally begin to give.

And he thought about the first time he met you.

#lee bodecker x reader #sheriff lee bodecker #lee bodecker #lee bodecker x you #lee bodecker x female reader #im still here fic

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silverynight · 1 year

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The little guardian

The mist hashira comes back looking for him; he still has this uninterested look on his face, but Kotetsu is ready this time, even behind his mask, he narrows his eyes, he hopes the Pillar can feel the hostility coming from him.

But it seems like he doesn't or that he doesn't care.

"The Yoriichi doll doesn't work anymore," the little boy says with a smirk on his face. It's true, he's scared about not being able to repair it, but he's also glad that Tokito won't be able to use it anymore.

That hashira is so incredibly rude and disrespectful and Kotetsu doesn't like him at all.

"I didn't come here for the doll," the mist hashira says and finally it's like light and life glimmer inside his eyes. He's interested in something, focused, although Kotetsu has no idea what that is yet. "I want to see Tanjirou."

"No." Kotetsu puffs his cheeks out, even though it's impossible for the Pillar to notice because of the mask. The boy has decided that Tanjirou is his older brother now, he's his family so he must protect him from infuriating people.

"I want to apologize," Tokito insists, looking slightly desperate this time.

Kotetsu likes what he sees.

"He doesn't like you."

The mist hashira grimaces at that, but doesn't make any attempts to leave the little kid alone.

"It's my fault, I know... For treating him the way I did," he admits, surprising Kotetsu for a moment. "But I promise I'll make it up to him. Just tell me where he is."

Never.

"Apologize to me first," Kotetsu says, puffing his chest out, growing confident, even though the Pillar made him feel bad days ago.

Almost in shock, Kotetsu watches as the hashira nods.

"I'm sorry for the things I told you. That was wrong." Tokito says then.

He really is desperate to see Tanjirou, huh? But why? Kotetsu is a little bit confused now.

"Where's Tanjirou?"

"No."

"Come on! I'm not going to hurt him!" The mist hashira swears, looking even more desperate now. Then, Kotetsu finally notices that he's carrying a bouquet of flowers in one of his hands.

"Are those for Tanjirou?"

Tokito blushes, but nods. And Kotetsu might be ten years old, but he knows what's going on. He's seen that in the village before... Older boys and girls flirting with each other.

"He's not going to like them."

"Why not? They told me they were really beautiful," Tokito says, looking down at his red flowers, now a little bit insecure.

"Because he doesn't like you."

"I'll try to change his mind."

"You won't be able to," Kotetsu assures him, getting a little bit irritated. Well, he already hates the guy.

"So you won't tell me where he is?"

The little boy can tell that Tokito is more than ready to start looking for Tanjirou on his own and the boy can't have that.

"He left the village."

"When?"

"I don't know."

"Did he go back to the butterfly estate?"

"I don't know."

By this point, Tokito looks a little bit irritated as well, but he tries not to show it and he's really good at it because the next time Kotetsu blinks, there's the same neutral expression back on his face.

"Alright, thank you anyway," he finally says before leaving and Kotetsu realizes that the Pillar didn't believe him at all.

***

Fortunately, he sees Tanjirou first and if he keeps him busy, maybe that ridiculous hashira won't be able to find him.

"What if the small boy with horrible long hair came back and apologized to you after what he said?" Kotetsu asks Tanjirou, as they have lunch together.

"You know he's a hashira, Kotetsu," Tanjirou smiles gently. "You should refer to him as that."

"I don't care."

Tanjirou rolls his eyes, but he doesn't scold him, Kotetsu knows the older boy has a soft spot for him; Tanjirou told him he reminded him of one of his siblings.

"So what would you do?"

"If he was being sincere, then I'd forgive him for sure," Tanjirou tells the boy. "Everyone deserves a second chance."

No. That won't do. Then the Pillar will try to flirt with Tanjirou and then marry him! That'd be a nightmare for Kotetsu.

"I don't like him."

"I know. And it's okay, he was very rude to you and hasn't apologized yet. So you have the right not to like him."

At that Kotetsu feels a little bit guilty, but not enough to tell Tanjirou to forgive him.

"Don't be his boyfriend. Okay?"

Tanjirou chokes on his tea and his face turns completely red in seconds.

"Why would you say something like that? He's not even interested in me!" Tanjirou chuckles nervously. "We're not even friends!"

"Just promise me you won't be his boyfriend because I don't like him."

Kotetsu can tell that Tanjirou finds his idea ridiculous, so he doesn't take him seriously.

"Okay," Tanjirou chuckles again, but this time he's genuinely amused. "I won't be Tokito-san's boyfriend."

"Promise me!"

"I promise."

Ha! Kotetsu just won! The rude hashira won't ever marry his big brother Tanjirou!

***

Patreon

#kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #tanjiro kamado #muichiro tokito #muitan

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shinsouscatpisssmell · 2 years

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Rehab

Paring:toxic!Eren x black!reader

Warnings: toxic relationships, miscarriages, usage of the n-word like once ,mmm that’s about it

An// this is a reupload! 🫡 I have to find links for the collab again 😭

Glass littered over the ground along with lamps and furniture like a robber ran amuck through the tiny apartment. Only the culprit still there cradling her belly while in the fetal position. Eyes sore and swollen nearly shut from tears.

Soft but powerful knocks litter on the door even though it was left wide open, "y/n? Sweetheart, are u okay? I heard some yelling and loud noises earlier and just wanted to check on ya' baby." the feeble voice of the granny living next door calls out. You could hear her carefully walk through the dirtied room and let out a worried gasp upon seeing your figure, "dear god child. Get up,get up! That's dangerous to be lying on the ground when it's like this. You Could cut yourself." putting a hand on your back and slowly making you sit up right before you let out a voice of crying pain and falling again onto the ground.

The older woman looks in worried at your hunched form before feeling a substance on her hand," y/n hats wrong,honey? Do you have something on you?" she shuffles over to the light switch flipping it on seeing red on her hand making her jump back as it painted her skin before letting put a shrill scream as you're bloodied. Not wasting a second she helps you up making you put most of your weight onto her.

"I got you,hon. I'm old but I be hitting the gym 5 times a week so relax." she walks you all the way down to the car. Assisting you in the passenger side and buckling before rushing to start the car, " do you need me to call your boyfriend? Uh what's his name? Ethan? Evan?" she snaps her fingers," even, right?"

You shake your head with the little focus you had left and your raspy voice speaks the first words spoken from you," no." she huffs and gives a quick nod of understanding before pulling out of the lot. The drive is silent only the radio tuning in and out of songs. Your ears catch the smooth voice of Rihanna start to play. Putting your head to glass and let her words speak to you allowing memories to flow through of the events that have and still are occurring.

"When we first met, I never felt something so strong."

Carry all those books in a crowded area.you were just asking to be knocked down by the ongoing human traffic. Arm's aching from the weight of 3 textbooks and your mind loading up with foul language towards the teachers and at your back for being so tiny.

Sucking your teeth in annoyance and the wall of people in your away completely ignoring your loud ,"excuse me"s. Arms almost giving up you made the decision to push your way through the crowd only to get pushed forward. Books getting scattered on the floor and as you cling to the back of a ransom's shirt as to not meet he same fate.

"Hey ,man. The fuck you think you're doing?" The man's voice was full of hostility and you can't blame him as you would be too had the situations been reverse.

Letting go of the stranger's clothes you quickly try to find some excuse, "I'm so sorry I didn't mean to do that. But it was my only life saver to not fall flat on my face."

You hear the stranger let out a small 'tch' before turning around and ready to give you a piece of his mind but words fell short when his jade eyes met yours. Time seemed to have slowed around the two of you as you didn't say a word. Being the first to shake out of the trance you begin to collect the pricey books off the floor.

"Again I'm so sorry. I'm really not trying to be rude but people just wouldn't move and I somehow ended up getting pushed."

"Hey, it's all good! No need to worry. I know how crowded in here it can get," he picks up the last one of your books off the ground

"Eren! Hurry your ass up or you're getting left!" You see the man ,who you guess was the 'eren' in question , frown at the group of people calling out to him ," they can't wait 5 fucking minutes? God damn. He rolls his eyes before turning back to you," but uh I'm eren.sorry for me being brash back there."

You let out a small bit of laughter before accepting the book from his grasp, " I'm y/n, a junior."

"Same here. What's your maj-"

"Yeager! We don't have time for you to try and get your dick wet! Hurry the fuck up."

Your Brow raised at the man of the hour and his face turns red, "I swear I would never- No i mean..I would with you just not right now?" he coughs regaining his cool," what I mean is would you like to go hang out sometime? Coffee or at the movies?"

"Nice save, Casanova." You chuckle, "I would love to. Maybe one weekend since I'm going to be swamped out the ass with assignments during the week."

"How about this weekend? Coffee on me at Paradis around noon?"

"mmm i would have to check my schedule but let me get back to you." you take the book from his hold, " but I can tell you're friends are about to leave you." You let out a small cackle at him whiping his head around at his friends who are starting to leave the hall.

"Fuck," he turns to you, " see you around?" Given a quick reassurance to him before he rushes off pushing people out the way to get to his group.

"Cute." Smiling to yourself while walking the other direction not really expecting anything other than a few HIs and hellos in the hallways

"You were like my lover and my best friend. All wrapped up into one with a ribbon it"

Even though no numbers or contact information, eren made a way to find you again like he had said. It took about two weeks to get to the coffee he promised and it went off without a hitch. Almost getting kicked out because he made you laugh your iced coffee out your nose. It was one outing you thought would only happen once since Eren was a well known player but date that led to two and then to three and so forth until he asked you to be official on your sixth date.

He made your heart flutter when he took your hands in his and stared at you with those jade eyes of his.

"You're the only one for me,y/n. My true love." He said it with such sincerity leading you in and sealing your fate with his sweeten words.

"And all of a sudden,you went and left. I didn't know how to follow."

The fairytale relationship you were living in slowly became your nightmare with his jealousy and overthinking.

"I don't see why you even need to go help him study. All he's trying to do is get in your pants." Eren is laying upside down on your bed while watching you put on your last earring and putting your box braids into two pigtails, " and why are you even getting dressed up? You're trying to look good for him now?"

You suck your teeth at him before turning around, "eren,I'm getting tired of you accusing me of shit. You're starting to push my buttons. This is like the fifth time you tried to hint at something going on and I'm fucking tired," putting on the finishing touching you cap your lipgloss back, "with all these accusations maybe you're the one cheating on me."

You could see him get up and sit on your bed the air turning serious and tense, "and what's that supposed to mean? You think I'm cheating?"

You fold your arms and silence falls upon the both of you almost like two cowboys getting ready for showdown, "so what if I am,huh? You can accuse me but the moment I do it to you I'm the problem?" His phone vibrates and you both glance at it. You squint your eyes on the contact name making out of " frani", a girl that eren told you that he had cut off after you two started dating.

"It's not what you think, y/n-"

"So you are cheating on me. With the same bitch you told me who used to be your sex friend. What happened to you cut her off? 'I'll never need another woman, you're my one and only?' You're such a fucking hypocrite." Mocking his voice watching him get angry at reciting his heartfelt words with such spite.

"Oh,I'm a hypocrite? You're the one getting all dressed up like a whore to go meet some guy who wants to get in your pants. I told you I cut her off and I did so don't come at me sideways."

"I could say the same to you! So you can talk to me like this but I can't when it comes to when you can't keep your dick in your pants?"

now I'm eachother faces and the argument getting heated.

"You know what? Fuck this. I don't gotta deal with this bullshit, he grabs his jacket from the floor where he had dropped it storming his way to the front, " you go enjoy your study session and I'll go have one of my own." He slammed your front door leaving you with tears of frustration as you push your face deep into a pillow and scream. The only thing bringing you out of it was the rumbling of the floor making you discover he dropped his phone and seeing the same name four times in a row made you curious on how much she had to say to him. You had known the passcode to his phone since you both had exchanged it two months back and after reading through the messages you wish you guys hadn't. Screenshotting and sending them to you for evidence.

Frani😈❤️

x/x/x

Bby~ are you really going to

leave me alone?

Eren

Leave me alone. I told you were done

I'm seeing y/n

Frani 😈❤️

That slut? I'm bet I'm so much better

I know how to please you bby

So why don't you come over

and have fun🥺

Eren

Hope u know my phone is going on silence cause a dumb bitch keeps txting me while I'm with my bby🤭

😍 go hump a couch cushion.😚

x/x/x

Frani😈❤️

This your girl?

*photo attachment*

It was a photo of you waiting outside the college gates.

Eren

And? She told me she was going to study .

🤨 you a stalker now?

Frani😈❤️

It doesn't look like studying to me

More like a date tbh 😗But that's just me 😋

*photo attachment*

Eren

Is that a dude?

Frani😈❤️

Mhmm😗

And I heard some pretty interesting things about these two😋

Eren

Like what?

Frani😈❤️

Nu uh you have to come here!

You know the address handsome 😘

Eren

...See you in 5

X/x/x

Frani😈❤️

I knew you missed me bby

We should do it again 🤭

Eren

I'm pretty sure y/n is having another study on Thursday

Same time?

Frani😈❤️

Ofc bby I'll wear the pretty panties u like

The picture shows you and a boy from your lab class walking to the Starbucks near campus. He was your partner since the beginning of the year so you both had made plans to go study together for the test the next week. You had texted eren earlier that you were going out and wouldn't meet him til late but he had cancel last minute.

You don't know when it started but tears dropped down to the screen making the light blurry before you had to close it. You wiped your eyes as anger takes over only seeing red.

Gathering all his stuff before throwing it out your apartment door.

"it's like a shock spun me around and my heart left. I feel so empty and hollow."

He banged on the door when he came back telling you to open it. You ignored him putting in your AirPods to drown him out before he begins spam text you.

Dirty ass dick bag 8=D

Baby... Are you really not opening the door?

All over a stupid argument ?

Don't I mean more to you?

You

Stop fuking texting me b4 I block u

Its eren I will push you off that ledge right now

So out of respect give me my space and go back to your whore.

Dirty ass dick bag 8=D

What whore?

You

*4 photo attachment*

U forgot already? Or did the find out a new std that gives u memory loss?

It's been 20 minutes since u sent those the text bubbles come and go.You hear a loud fuck outside the door before your phone started to ring. It went to voicemail at least 3 times before you finally picked it up.

"Are you really not going to open the door?" His voice sounded defeated.

"Why'd you do it eren? Do you know how much I want to wring your neck right now?" Your confidence wavering at the sound of his voice, "was I not enough,huh? SAY SOMETHING!" You yell over the mic.

"You are enough,y/n. You're all I need, I promise baby." He reassured you making you more pissed off .

"Then what you can trust some whore over me? You don't trust me enough when I say I'm not cheating? Have I done it before? Flirted,kiss, or even lead someone on?"

"No,princess.it's not you I don't trust. It's the guys I don't trust. You're so pretty and nice willing to help anyone you can and I'm a shitty douchebag who only ruins the one good thing happening to him. I shouldn't have believed he words. I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry." You could hear him get quiet over the phone. He didn't know you where stalking closer to the door and could hear him crying.

You open the door and threw your arms around him, " don't cry,eren.I forgive you,baby." He drops his head on your shoulder giving it small kisses.

"I promise I won't ever hurt you again ok baby? " his words comforted you and you believed them to be true.

"You don't even recognize the ways you hurt me,do you? It's gonna take a miracle bring me back."

You dated on and off for two years. It was like you were stuck in a loop while you were dating until the day he got on one knee and asked you to be his wife. Even though you were basking in your love for another your instincts were telling you your honeymoon phase would end soon because that's just how the cycle went. You were coming home from your job at the hospital. You had moved with eren a year back to a bigger apartment that could accommodate to the two of you. It was in a pretty nice neighborhood and neighbors not to nosy and more so on the friendly side.

"Hi, (y/n). I thought you had the day off today?" It was mrs.Johnson an old lady who lived beside you who gave you food from time to time. She gossips to you about all the latest news between the residents as she knows everything because she owns the buildings and you're grateful for the closeness in case you're short on rent one month.

"No ma'am I've been at work since 6 am this morning. I just want to go shower and heat up that food you brought yesterday." you fished for your keys before putting in the door knob.

"oh I thought heard you and eren earlier. Hah to be young and in love. Maybe I should get back into the dating scene." She gushes put seats at the idea making you leave.

Over the chuckles you look at her confused, "Mrs.Johnson...what do you mean you heard me and him earlier?"

"And you're the one to blame and now I feel like"

Kicking your off the shoes at the front door and slowly shutting the front door. Eyes scanning through the poorly dim living room catching clothes and shoes that belong to eren and some heels and a dress that surely wasn't yours. It said everything you needed to know as you stalk to your bedroom after hearing some laughter making sure your footsteps were light like you were on air.

The bedroom door was already wide open so you could gaze upon eren in his nakedness and girl you didn't even know the name of in your bed while pressing her breast against wren's chest.

"You cheating nigga." You're body got hot as the girl screamed and covered herself in the covers you and eren had picked out when you went looking for furniture.

"Who the fuck are you?" The girl had the audacity to ask like you were the one who interrupted and barged into their home.

"No, who the fuck are you? Last time I checked your name isn't on the fucking lease mine is? You nasty slut."

"Y/n, come on it isn't-" you interrupted eren not cutting eye contact with the girl putting your pointer finger to silence him

"You don't even fucking talk to me you cheating fucking liar," you look at him and start swinging your purse,"So all those times you cheated on me before weren't enough, huh?Why even ask me to marry you, you fucking dick!" You don't stop hitting him while the some of the content of your purse slosh out the sides, "I.hate.you. So. Fucking much. I hate you. I hate you. I loathe you." You don't stop until his chest is red.

Letting him be the object to take all your pain and anger on before you got pushed to side by the mystery woman of the hour.

"You can't just go around hitting him." she's covering her nude body with the sheets.

"Historia, what the fuck. Don't push her, are you fucking crazy?" Eren helps you up holding you back before you could bounce her and get your lick back, "just leave , fuck."

"Are you serious,eren? I thought we were having something special?"historia said baffled before you throw a pillow at her pushing her back.

"Dead serious now leave my fucking house,bitch." You told her before he even could.

Watching her stomp and grab her clothing aggressively off the ground before storming out and slamming the door as hard as she could.

It indicated that it was time to turn back to the person who was the main culprit pushing him away from you, " don't fucking touch me, eren! I want your ass out . Get your shit and leave!"

"Y/n, hold on to that, your foot is looking swollen and we should take you to the hospital to check that out, baby." He tries to hold you again but you move out the way of it.

"Don't call me baby, don't fucking touch me," you get up and try to stand on two feet but a shock of pain shoots up your left leg making you crumble in a small howl, "god dammit," you started crying not sure from the pain or the situation maybe even possibly both.

Eren finally comes over and starts to cradle you in his arms giving you reassuring hushes, " I told you, y/n. It looks like it could be broken but I'm not sure." He picks you up and holds onto you the best he could not letting you out pressure on it.

"I hate you eren. I hate you so much." You repeatedly say to him crying.

"I know baby just stay with me."

"Oh you're the reason why I'm thinkin', I don't wanna smoke on these cigarettes no more."

You're laying in bed with a cast on your leg for the next month and half because you landed wrong on your foot when you were pushed. As if you needed anymore reminders of Eren's infidelity. It mocks you everytime you look at it as you rage inside. There's a knock on your bedroom door.

"Baby, I brought you some food." It was eren. He insisted that he stay and take care of you because it was his fault. The doctor suggested you not be alone during this period so you could stay off of it. You agreed nonetheless the only condition that you stated was that he sleep on the couch and your door remain shut.

"Don't call me that eren." You turn the channel to something more interesting, "you can just leave the food on the bed. I'll eat it later." Not giving him a glance. Waiting to hear the door shut.

"Come on y/n it's been 4 weeks. When are you going to talk to me." He stands in front of the tv and you scoff.

"Maybe when you can turn back time and not sticking your dick in some rando and me having to walk in on it or better yet when you erase my memories of all the times you betrayed my trust and I went against all my instincts to give my heart to you again. But wait we can't do that now can we?," pointing to the cast on your foot in a dramatic way, " but here I am stuck with this fucking cast on my foot reminding me of the day over and over again of your fucking mistress pushing me after catching you to fucking in OUR bed. So when you can do all that, super man. I'll talk, k?" You huff out a breathe before turning your show louder to not hear him talk.

"Y/-"

"LA LA LA, I CANT HEAR YOU."

"Can you please stop being so chil-"

You turn it to the highest volume to drown him out before he grunts in anger and unplugs the tv.

"Hey! I was watching that. It's the only thing out of the two of you that won't cheat one me."

"Y/n! Just listen, please. I'm begging." He sits on the corner of the bed where his side used to be before putting his face in his hands sighing. You want to say more but you decide against it.

"I'm sorry, babe. I'm so sorry. She was a drunken mistake at first back when you first started working late at the hospital and we weren't really talking...I let it get out of hand." He said not facing you anymore feeling you stare his back down as you calculated it.

"So three fucking months after we got married? You couldn't stand being tied down for that long in the some cooch so you had to go find someone else? Why eren? Why? Am I boring? Am I ugly? Why am I not enough for you!? You asked me to marry you. I didn't force you. Not in this relationship. Not to be with me. Never. So what's fucking wrong with me that you seek the warmth of other woman." You pound on him with a pillow you could grab

"I don't know. I honestly don't. I-...I just get scared that what we have is to good. I want to mess it up to give you an excuse to leave me before you just leave out of nowhere." He drawls out a longer sigh than the first before he starts to wipe his face with his shirt.

"I wouldn't just up and leave you, eren. I love you with so much of my being and that's why every time I take you back and you do this shit again. I'm the big dummy! Not you everytime."

"I know, I know and I'm sorry I won't do this again, I promise baby. Just give me one last chance." He faces you with redden eyes from rubbing them with the rough fabric of his shirt.

"..,"you inhale some air and breathe out taking a few minutes to gather your words and clear your consciousness ,"I'm going to regret his Give me sometime eren, deal?"

"Ok baby." He gives you a singular kiss on the forehead before plugging back in your tv.

"Damn,ain't crazy when you're love swept? You'd do anything for the one you love."

It's been 3 weeks since the cast came off and to lsay eren was less than perfect was an understatement. Even after you were able to walk around he didn't let you lift a finger taking over all the chores and cooking.

You had just came home while seeing him whisper on the phone once he heard the door but you could see the vein on his forward throb.

You sneak up behind him and snake your arms around his waist while giving him a small kiss on his back, "hey babe."

"Don't call her again, I said you got the wrong number." He hung up the house phone before turning around to give you a kiss, "how was work?"

"It was pretty good just boring stuff today! Nothing to dish." You bend over the counter letting the new chain he got you in his name for your anniversary while he opens up take-out food containers," who was that on the phone anyway,E?"

"Nobody important. Just a telemarketer trying to sell us a new condo." He holds up one of the food," you want some of this?" He ask before putting it on your plate and you shake your head in disgust making him laugh.

"I'm glad we could work this out eren, I love you." You cuddle him on the couch as he swallows his bite of food before putting his arm around your shoulders, "I love you too."

"Cause anytime that you needed me I'd be there It's like you were my favorite drug,The only problem is that you was using me.In a different way than I was using you,but now that I know it's not meant to be I gotta go, I gotta wean myself off of you"

It was late at night while you couldn't go to sleep feeling sick for the past three weeks and when you heard the phone ringing off the hook .after the first time you got any sleep you were seething after the seventh time of it ringing, you got out the bed and snatch the phone up whispering harshly into it, "hello, who is this?" You were accompanied by nothing but static making you irritated before repeating yourself again.

"Eren...I-I'm two months pregnant,please.I cant do this without you, baby." It was Historia crying over the phone and talking but you couldn't hear any of it drooping the phone after the words pregnant left her mouth.

You stalked your way to the bedroom and woke eren up.

"Y/n? What's up baby?" He said groggily rubbing the sleep and his brown hair away His eyes.

"You lied to me again... you knew that she was pregnant! She was on the phone that day." You rip the covers from his body, " get out ,eren."

He perks up with swiftness, " let's talk about this."

"No.get the fuck out, we're done. GO meet your baby mama." You walk away forcing your anger on the objects around you. Throwing a lamp at the wall and screaming out with rage. Stripping the new sheets and covers from

The bed throwing them at him so push him towards the door, " get out now! You push him out the bedroom door by throwing things, " you lie and lie and lie. And I believe you every fucking time. I should have listened to my mother. Get the fuck out of my apartment, leave!"

Throwing the couch cushions at him to push him near the door ignoring his protests.

"This is why I didn't tell you. You would go fucking crazy like this , y/n! You never wanna talk to me about anything. It's always my fault."

"Because it fucking is eren! I'm at fault for taking your stupid ass fake tears as something meaningful like you meant your words."

"SEE, I knew you wouldn't drop the old shit. I knew you still held that shut against me. Have I not proved enough by taking care of you all this time and not going out. Not hanging with my friends just being there for you?"

"DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELF! you sound like a total jack ass right now. I never asked you to stop hanging out with your friends. When we got married we promised to take care of each other so you doing these petty ass chores and cooking for a month after I did it for you more than you did it for me! "

"God fucking dammit," he pounds his fist against the wall, " I'm done. I'll be back later." He slams the door open not bothering to shut it .

"NO, WE'RE DONE EREN. D-O-N-E." You yell from your spot. Gripping at your hair like your going crazy and screaming,yelling, and crying at different points in between tearing pictures off the wall and smashing them on the floor.flipping over chairs before falling on your knees crying hysterically into the ground.

There's a sharp pain in your stomach when you go down making your rub your stomach to try and soothe it thinking you got a tiny scrap or something and not caring to check at the moment to swamped in your thoughts. Soon blacking out from blood lost.

“Next time you wanna go on and leave,I should just let you go on and do it 'Cause now I'm using like I bleed”

You wake up with Mrs. Johnson rubbing your hand , " are you up now, honey?" Giving you a reassuring smile, "I'll go get the doctor." She pats your hand again twice.

It doesn't take long before they come into the room with your chart. Checking your eyes and mouth while asking questions of do you know where you are and how'd you get there.

"Well mrs. Y/n, I have some good news and I have some bad news." He checks the chart one last time and his smiling turning down for a smidge second, "congratulations are in order on your pregnancy," you stare at him like he was alien, " I take you didn't know?"

"I mean I just thought it was a stomach bug from some bad take out." You said rubbing your belly.

"You seem to be about 4 weeks,however" he pauses and Mrs.Johnson's grips your hand, " you had miscarriage, mrs.Johnson old us when she found you you were passed out so it was probably for a while. Although we tried to saved all 3 only 2 were we able to detect a heartbeat." You looked over at mrs.Johnson as your mouth went dry .

"I'm sorry for your loss ma'am.

"It's like I checked into rehab And baby, you're my disease"

"Baby? Y/n?" You could hear his voice but you don't respond to his call . Crying in silence not wanting him near you.

"There you are! I've been calling your name up and down the hospital. Did you not hear?" He was carrying a bouquet of your favorite flowers."

"I lost one of my babies eren." You're trying not to breakdown while your voice sounds but your voice sounds so defeated.

"What are you talking about? You were never pregnant...right?"

"I gotta check into rehab'Cause baby you're my disease"

You two are cuddling in your hospital bed. Your head is on his chest and your rubbing circles on your belly feeling butterflies flutter.

"I'm going to change baby. I promise. No more secrets." He says grip tightly on shoulder.

"Eren"

"Yeah?"

"I want a divorce."

#aot x you #aot x y/n #aot x black reader #aot x female reader #toxic eren #eren jeager x reader #eren x reader #eren x y/n #eren yaegar #eren x you #eren x black reader #eren x black y/n #Spotify

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