#even when people claimed you didn’t care I knew you did and I stood by ur side
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bumblebeehug · 2 days ago
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I'm starving for nalu angst content. Please feed me?
i shall feed you with some of the best angst i can muster<3 thank @zuzu-fairys-tail for prompting this tihi
For the sake of Love
Summary: Natsu makes a mistake that drives him away from Lucy, but when he returns, he's forced to face the aftermath. Notes: This fic works as a stand-alone, but makes direct references to "Unrequited Love" Part of this series Ao3 - FF.net
***
Natsu had never thought about love as something he would experience. He had seen other people express it, claiming that their life didn’t start until they met their significant other. He heard them talk about needs, desires, communication and other otherworldly things – otherworldly, he called them, because couldn’t this apply to anyone? Why did it have to be a specific person? Why them?
He once asked Gray about this. He mentioned his relationship with Juvia, how they had been going steady ever since the team got home from the hundred years quest, but that he couldn’t understand where their original relationship had gone. Their yandere-tsundere act, their genuine friendship – had he really given it up for the sake of “love”?
“They cohabit,” was Gray’s curt answer, clearly disgusted having to talk about feelings with an idiot like Natsu.
No matter how much Natsu pressed him after that, Gray wouldn’t elaborate. Cohabit. He asked Levy for a definition, and came to the conclusion that that’s what he and Happy did. Lived together, spent time together, cared for each other. Except, he wouldn’t marry Happy even if he stood at gunpoint, so Gray couldn’t have been serious. He kept the real information for himself, the actual secret behind normal love and romantic love – what they meant and what differentiated them.
Before Natsu met Lucy, he was going through a troubled period in his life. He had spent so much time alone ever since Lisanna died. His home was dusty and empty, any time he spent in Magnolia was spent at the guild hall, and even his time there was limited to when he was between missions. And those missions then – they would last for weeks at a time, and anytime he found a lead on Igneel, he would follow it, resulting in more time spent away. It could go days between his last conversation with humans, though luckily he didn’t go anywhere without his blue furry pal.
Then Lucy entered the picture. If Natsu hadn’t been talking a whole lot before, now he barely got a word in edgewise. Except, he didn’t dislike hearing her chatter away like there was no tomorrow. It filled his brain, the empty space that normally made his loneliness echo throughout the night. Lucy was a breath of fresh air in comparison to speaking to anyone else in the guild. They all knew him for his losses – losing Igneel, losing Lisanna – but here he had a girl who didn’t define him by these things. She valued Natsu for his current self, the one she had met in Hargeon, who was strong, friendly and reliable. He appreciated this – he didn’t have to feel out of place when he entered the guild. Plus, she was easily impressed by all he had to offer. It was almost too good to be true.
After her, the world shifted. He was once again finding joy in the simple things. Jobs became more intricate and engaging, and even when the reward was butchered he’d always leave with a good feeling in his stomach. He enjoyed hearing her explain plants she saw on the way home from the job, and though he never enjoyed trains, he felt at ease knowing she wouldn’t leave him on it. Lucy became his ground pillar, the safety line that kept him from falling. Soon enough he found himself looking towards her every time he outdid himself. He wanted to know that she had seen, that she knew how far he had come. And the best part was that every time he searched for her eyes, she was already looking at him. Her support was unwavering.
At least, that’s what he thought. Lucy was always going to be there, searching for him, aiming all her attention to Natsu. He believed that her door would always be wide open for him, and if it wasn’t, he’d be granted an open window – something that told him that she wanted them to connect. For years, that was true. He had landed in the fact that he loved her presence, and she loved his. That their friendship was beyond just friends – soulmates would be more accurate.
But Natsu felt inadequate. Like he was failing at being a normal human. He had been haunted by the fact that he never was seen as any other guy – he was always a dragon, a demon, or in some cases a dunce. Truthfully, he didn’t want that. So one day he took a look at himself, and at other guys his age, and did a comparison. What was it Natsu did wrong, where did he fail as a human?
It didn’t take long to notice it. Almost every guy his age had been with, or currently was with, a partner. Not in the way Lucy was a partner, though he often referred to her as such, but in a dirtier way. There was jealousy, touching, tasting and biting, not always confined to a private space, seeing as he had noticed all this just in the guild hall. Jet had yet another girlfriend fuming with anger as she ran out of the bar area – she had apparently had enough of being compared to Levy. Natsu didn’t actually crave that sort of love, but he still couldn’t help but search for it.
The day he met her, he was on a solo mission. Happy and Lucy were visiting the Exceeds, but Natsu wanted some extra money for food, so he’d gone alone on a quest to catch some dark wizards before they got their hands on a sacred jewel from the village. It was walking distance, the pay was good, and Natsu would get to let off some steam: it was the perfect mission. What he didn’t know was that within that group of wizards, there’d be a mage with the most captivating looks.
Her light blue hair and fierce, deep green eyes had him captured. Not captured enough to avoid him from defeating the group, but enough to make him feel like he couldn’t help but to try to talk to her. Surely she’d come over to the good side if they had a good heart to heart? Natsu was confident that all she needed was some TLC: a warm shower, a proper conversation, and a soft bed to sleep in.
That night, Natsu did things he’d never done before. She had kissed him, and to his initial surprise, he had kissed her back. The small voice in the back of his mind, worrying about Lucy, was quickly pushed away. This was what he wanted – he had waited for a moment like this for years. A chance to hop on the train to being a normal guy, someone with girlfriends, exes, an emotional life. So under the sheets they went: he believed their activities would come to an end after this, resembling something of a “one night stand” as he’d heard people call it.
Man, was he wrong. The lust that awoke within him suddenly felt untamable: he needed her to satisfy him. It was years of pent up longing, though he still wasn’t sure for who he had longed. She seemed quite satisfied with their relationship though. Their sessions were intense, only lasting a day a month, so whatever they had could be kept a secret. Lucy and Happy didn’t have to know.
But soon enough, the two of them came to talk before and after their meetings. They’d talk about anything at first: the weather, recent news from the area, things that had happened on missions they’d gone to – she had listened to his advice way back then and started up as a novice witch, freelancing her way around while she got used to the good side of the wizarding world. Natsu was thrilled, because now he could share his struggle: they were both equally destructive in their ways. Between sessions they’d find themselves comparing ways they destroyed towns: Natsu still winning by a landslide, though to be fair, they weren’t yet exactly on common ground. She had many years ahead of her to sharpen her tactics – if getting more destructive was part of it, then so be it.
Natsu loved her ways. He found himself thinking this quite often. He loved how she laughed, how she moved, the things she did. Never having felt this before, he quickly got swept away by the intensity. Suddenly he met up with her multiple times a week, not even to do anything dirty – just to talk to her. She seemed to share his sentiment, not really initiating any major sessions unless the mood was really there: she was clearly interested in him back. When Natsu realised this, he thought he’d finally gotten back the good karma he’d collected over the years, that the universe owed him.
Before he could ask her out properly though, he felt like he had to stop this secrecy. He hated not being able to tell Lucy about things, and it felt weird that she knew everything about Lucy, while she knew nothing about her.
The plan was to just kindly drop the ball in Lucy’s lap. He’d tell her about her, keep his description of her short and clean, and then she’d slowly get used to the idea. It’s not like he didn’t know how special their relationship had been lately: they’d kept up the husband-wife act, she allowed him to share her bed, though nowadays he longed for her smell in it (he couldn’t tell Lucy that of course), they ate almost all meals together, and still went on missions. The only difference was that he was starting to like the idea of doing these things with her as well. And even he knew that he couldn’t have both: he couldn’t have his cake and eat it too.
His confession to Lucy hadn’t gone as he’d planned. He had taken her to this diner across Magnolia, made sure they took the long way there so they could enjoy their company a bit before he put his big news out there: in hindsight he realised it must have led her on. When they sat down, Natsu could barely contain himself. As soon as drinks were ordered, he grabbed her hands, sparkled in his eyes, and dropped the bomb.
“Lucy, I think I’m in love.”
As soon as he said it he let everything about her spill out. He couldn’t stop talking, it felt like he was in a daze: it felt so incredibly good being able to talk about this. To Lucy nonetheless. In fact, if you asked him then and there, he’d tell you he was in his version of heaven – and that being said knowing how great sex with her was. This, however, didn’t compare. Him and Lucy, no secrets, and he was in love. He’d be dancing on the table if the establishment was slightly less refined. So he talked and talked, about midday blue hair and eyes green as the forests from his childhood: and he didn’t see the way Lucy pressed her lips into a thin line, how tears threatened to build up in her eyes, or how her heartbeat got heavier. These were all things he would realise once he arrived back home, but wouldn’t be certain if it he’d just imagined or not.
If Natsu could go back in time and change how he had told Lucy, he absolutely would have, without a doubt in his mind. But that was only because in hindsight, he realised that Lucy might have harbored deeper feelings for him. He hadn’t realised it at first, dense as he often could be, but it was apparent once he took his usual trip to Lucy’s apartment just to find her doors locked, her windows closed and her blinds drawn. It was weird, caught Natsu off guard, and left him with a gruelling, dull ache in his chest. Did he prompt her to do this? Not wanting to draw any hasty conclusions, he went back every day the following week. Surely he’d catch her going outside to get groceries one of these days? But to his terror, she didn’t.
When he asked the guild about Lucy’s whereabouts, all he got was curt, dismissive answers. In a way, that answered his question: he was the cause of this. Even Happy had turned against him: he now spent most of his time in Lucy’s apartment. Natsu couldn’t blame him: he hadn’t told him about her until right after he’d gotten home from telling Lucy. Happy was Natsu’s oldest friend, so it was natural he’d hold a grudge if Natsu didn’t tell him about important things in his life. But that he’d be cooping up at Lucy’s place was the thing that set his theory in stone: Lucy must have had a crush on Natsu. There really wasn’t any other explanation. Happy was attached to Lucy, sure, but there had to be some sort of resentment from Natsu not going out with Lucy instead of the girl. Happy could be territorial in that way – he didn’t want new people to come and steal away Natsu’s attention.
For months things were weird in the guild. Natsu never knew how reliant the guild was on his and Lucy’s team: without them all working together as usual, it was like the mood in the guild hall had gone grey and stale. Natsu focused on solo missions, secretly doing them with her so he could get any extra help he might need. Sometimes it bugged him that Lucy wasn’t the one with him, but he brushed it off as just not being used to teaming up with someone who didn’t have the diversity of 15 different celestial spirits close by. Though it happened that he’d feel annoyed when she ignored clear instructions once again, causing double the amount of damage that was necessary for the mission. He suspected he was learning how it must have been working with him all these years.
Natsu couldn’t help but act like a busybody when it came to Lucy. He had promised himself to stay out of her business, but when he heard that she was looking thinner, he worried she didn’t have enough money for both rent and food: soon he started slipping a couple of thousand jewells to her landlady. Just so she’d keep her eye on Lucy for him.
One day he saw her there, in the guild, at the table with Levy and Cana. Before she noticed he was there she looked almost exactly like she used to: radiant, happy, gorgeous. The second she laid her eyes on him, her entire aura changed. With it, her normal appearance seemed to fade away as well. Suddenly he saw every pore in her face, felt her ragged breath in the air, noticed deep under eye bags contrasting the paleness of her skin. Her cheeks were sunken in and her muscles deflated – had he done this to her?
That’s when he started with the sympathy-smiles. He felt as stupid doing them as she probably felt receiving them, but before he could get out of it, it had become a habit. He’d draw the left side of his mouth, his lips pressed together as the corner of his mouth tried to turn into something of a smile, though it’d fail every time before it had a chance to turn upwards. Everytime he did it, he’d hear her swallow hard, smell tears in her eyes, and he’d feel the burning eyes of any fellow dragon slayers in the room – they all blamed him.
Natsu wasn’t sure he enjoyed living life like this. He loved her, without a doubt: they had finally become a couple, enjoying their date nights to the fullest. But even though he considered her a kindred spirit, he felt like something was missing. He wanted some contrast in their relationship. They could talk about something, find a word they didn’t quite understand, and then… silence. Silence where Lucy would kindly take her time and explain the word, its origin and how it was used: often with a couple of synonyms as well. That was how he even knew the word synonym. It was all thanks to Lucy.
Once, when they were thirty minutes into an intimate session, Natsu accidentally called out her name. Not her name, but Lucy’s. A faint whisper, right by her ear, making her jump out of bed quicker than he’d ever seen her move before.
“What did you just say?” She was grasping at her clothes, gathering them from the floor, distraught painted all over her face. “Lucy?”
Natsu fell over in bed, hurrying to cover his goods with the blanket.
“I- I don’t know. I didn’t mean to,” he tried. It was in vain, he realised, as he watched her blue curls swoosh with her very violent shaking of her head.
“No. It’s- it’s too weird, Natsu. I’ve known that you’ve loved her for a really long time, but I was stupid to think I could make you get over her.” She had tears prickling the corners of her eyes, though it looked like she was keeping them in check for now. She’d probably let them out as soon as he was out of sight. She tended to do that. Cover up any sign of weakness in case Natsu’s opinion of her would change. Maybe it would. He wasn’t so sure of himself anymore.
“Love? I don’t- not with her,” Natsu pressed his lips into a thin line, like his mouth had grown accustomed to recently. He never seemed to do his signature grin anymore: there was always something stopping him.
“How couldn’t it be love, Natsu? You always talk about her, you’ve preached to me how she changed your life! You’re one of the most romantic people I’ve ever met, but you were never romantic with me. It wasn’t me who you uprooted a tree for. It wasn’t me you turned into a demon for.” Her bottom lip quivered. “I know you want to love me. Maybe you do. But it will never compare. I’m sorry. Let’s end this here.”
Maybe she was right. Natsu watched her as she pulled on her pants and her shirt. He didn’t feel like stopping her from leaving. He didn’t like seeing her cry, but he wasn’t ready to do anything in his power to stop her. Though, his resolve on crying girls had been weak since some time back, considering that he didn’t drop everything in his life to stop Lucy from doing it. He’d become very similar to guys he had no respect for: he hated this.
When she was almost out the door, she stopped a second. Just a split second, hoping that he’d run forward to stop her. A quick glance over her shoulder: he looked like he was in his own world. She wasn’t sure he had ever really cared about her. In her eyes, they were practically kids, just swept away in the heat of the moment. His short obsession with her had only been a quick infatuation in comparison to what he had with Lucy. Everywhere they went, on every date, every topic: Lucy had seemed like a third party in their relationship. He spoke of her like she was the greatest person in the world, and though she couldn’t help but harbor a tiny bit of resentment for her, she also knew that Lucy must be a pretty amazing girl if she had managed to capture a flighty guy like Natsu.
__________
Natsu stayed at that hotel for a couple of days. He’d only told people he’d be gone for the night, back in the morning again, but they didn’t come looking for him despite his brief disappearance. He still couldn’t completely grasp what he’d done, but with every hour in that bed, the place he’d called out for Lucy instead of her in the depths of his passion, he found himself deeper in his realisations: he had fucked up.
He laid in unrest under the tan covers of the hotel duvet. He’d spent the last six months in his life in a daze, and now everything was rushing back to him in waves of regret, making him feel ill. He didn’t know how to fix this: life had turned upside down. He had messed up so badly, leaving his perfect life with Lucy and the guild, for a brief period to feel like a normal, shitty guy in puberty. Was it worth it? Destroying years of intimate friendship, breaking up the best team Fairy Tail had ever seen, leaving Happy behind to have irresponsible fun with a girl he barely knew?
He appreciated the time he’d gotten to spend with her, he really did, but it didn’t compare. Nothing gave him the sense of satisfaction that he’d reach from succeeding at a really silly prank in Lucy’s house. She didn’t give him the butterflies Lucy had given him when she traced flowers on his shoulder in the dead of night. 
Natsu was still confused. The relationships he’d experienced were so vastly different: but didn’t he do everything right? He gave the nasty love a chance, to save his love for Lucy from the dirtiness. He thought he’d juggled the two of them, one would fill his body’s desires and the other his soul’s. Lucy wouldn’t have to see him as the horrid person he really was behind closed doors. She got to see everything else: his happiness, sadness, everything that made him the person he wanted to be. Surely she wouldn’t accept him if she knew the dirty dreams that would leave his underwear soaked in the morning. He didn’t accept that version of himself: how could she?
When he stood up from his fetal position in his bed, and finally went to the bathroom to wash his face, he didn’t recognise the person looking back at him in the mirror. It was him, technically. Pink hair, sharp, monolid eyes, pointy teeth. But he had wrinkles between his light eyebrows, his mouth couldn’t curl into his normal grin: his eyes didn’t follow his commands. He pulled at his cheek. Those lips had kissed her more times than he could count. They felt dry, and looked pale in the reflection. These weren’t lips allowed to kiss someone as important as Lucy. No, he was completely inadequate. His hair was choppy, after having tried to cut it back to his normal lengths with a pair of kitchen scissors. Cancer wasn’t able to help him with that anymore, but he missed how soft his hair could feel after 5 minutes under Cancer’s care.
His neck looked thin and stretched out, faint marks from passionate kissing the night before, still left on the sides. For some time he’d at least be able to cover it up with his scarf. His eyes continued to scan what the reflection showed him: his bronzy skin had a gray tint, his hair looked duller, and then those eyes. A bit red from not getting any sleep last night, but more importantly: they had completely lost whatever sparkle they had before. He wasn’t sure when he’d last taken a good look at himself – maybe this dullness came from the break up with her, but honestly? Deep down he knew he’d lost it months ago. It was like the horrible actions he’d consistently made had slowly desaturated him, leaving him an empty shell of what he once was. There was a time when he was proud of what he saw: he was righteous, tough and had a fiery determination – where had it gone?
He threw his scarf back on and went back to bed. Could he really deal with Lucy when he came back? Would she let him talk to her? He wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t. But in a way, he thought he owed her at least the truth. He wasn’t completely sure what the truth was yet: if it was his love for Lucy he wanted to convey, or his regret over his past actions.
The thoughts churned in his mind like a storm that refused to settle. He turned in bed, his body refusing to settle. Soon enough the night was there again, coming back to taunt him: keep him up at night and make him reflect on the life that had led him up to this. It was all his fault. He had to gather himself though. Not able to figure out where to start, knowing this couldn’t go on. He owed Lucy something – an apology, a confession, or maybe just the clean cut, yet gory truth about what a mess he had become. Even if she slammed the door in his face, even if she never spoke to him again, he needed to face her. He needed to fix at least one broken thing in his life, even if it wasn’t repairable.
Morning light streamed in through the thin hotel curtains. It painted the room in soft, warm tones that felt at odds with the cold knot in his chest. Natsu sat on the edge of the bed, hands clasped tightly together as if trying to stop them from shaking. He’d never felt fear like this – not when he faced dragons, dark guilds, or any of the countless battles he’d endured. No, this was different. This was the fear of standing in front of someone he loved and knowing he had ruined everything.
His scarf felt heavier on his shoulders as he adjusted it. It smelled faintly of ash and campfire – a comforting remnant of the person he used to be. He clung to that thought as he forced himself to his feet. Every step toward the door felt like dragging a mountain, but he kept moving. He didn’t pack anything; there was nothing worth keeping from this place except the lesson it had burned into him.
The guild would notice his return soon enough, and he had no illusions about the reception waiting for him. Anger, disappointment, maybe even indifference—he wasn’t sure which would be worse. But none of it mattered. His focus wasn’t on Fairy Tail, nor on repairing his reputation. He wasn’t coming back to make amends with the guild. He was coming back for Lucy.
As he stepped out into the bustling street, the cool morning air hit his face, and for the first time in days, he took a deep breath. It didn’t cleanse him, not really, but it steadied his steps. He didn’t have a plan, and his words were as jumbled as his thoughts. All he had was the drive to see her, to stand in front of her and let her see what he couldn’t put into words.
Because if there was one person in this world who could look at him, broken and lost, and still see something worth saving, it was Lucy. And for that, he owed her everything.
__________
The streets leading to Lucy’s apartment felt eerily familiar, but every step carried a weight he couldn’t shake. Magnolia was alive as always – shopkeepers setting up for the day, townsfolk chatting – but the world seemed muted to him. His thoughts drowned out the noise, focusing only on the path ahead. He didn’t dare to look up, in case he’d see any familiar faces. The shame and guilt he dragged along him surely made his face look contorted, ugly and fake.
He stopped in front of Lucy’s building and tilted his head up. Her window was closed, curtains drawn. Was she even home? The question almost made him turn around. But his feet refused to move, as if the ground had anchored him there. He couldn’t run anymore.
The staircase felt steeper than usual as he climbed to her door, the wooden railing creaking under his grip. When he finally stood outside her apartment, he stared at the engraved number on the door, a number he’d never thought twice about before. Now it felt like a barrier, daring him to go through with this. 7. The number that had haunted him throughout his life: sometimes as an omen, other times as a sign of luck. He wasn’t sure what it represented today, but he knew he’d been blind for its positive connections for too many years.
His fist hovered near the door. For a moment, he hesitated, his knuckles shaking slightly. What if she didn’t answer? Worse, what if she did? What would he even say?
Natsu gritted his teeth, swallowed the thickness in his throat as his stomach protested in turmoil, and forced the thoughts away. He’d come this far; there was no turning back now. Taking a deep breath, he knocked firmly on the door.
The sound echoed in the narrow hallway, louder than he anticipated. For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of his breathing. Then, faint footsteps.
The doorknob turned, and the door opened just enough for Lucy’s face to peek out. Her expression was unreadable—neutral, but her eyes betrayed a flicker of surprise.
“Natsu?” she asked softly, her voice cautious. Her face was tense, like she was forcing away whatever her feelings tried to express through it.
He opened his mouth, but the words caught in his throat. Her gaze was steady, and for the first time in months, he felt like the world had stopped moving. He hadn’t seen her face this close in months. He didn’t know if he wanted to laugh or cry. It was her, his Lucy in the flesh. No, not his Lucy. He couldn’t call her that anymore. He hadn’t been able to for a long time.
“Hey,” he managed to croak out, voice low. He fidgeted with the edge of his scarf, trying to find the courage to say what he’d rehearsed in his head on the way here. “Can we… Can we talk?”
Lucy’s eyes searched his face, and whatever she saw there made her pause. She stepped back slightly, the door opening just a little wider. The air from her apartment leaked out, filling his nose with the wonderful nostalgia of their past life together. His heart ached. He had missed this so much.
“Yeah,” she said, after what felt like an eternity. “Come in.”
Natsu stepped inside, his heart pounding. He looked around, seeing her books stacked in neat piles and her celestial keys resting on the coffee table. Everything was just as he remembered, yet it felt like years had passed since he’d been here. He didn’t see any signs of the life they had lived together in there: the space he’d been given once to put his shoes in the hallway was filled with a pair of her sneakers. He didn’t see his coffee cup anywhere, waiting for him to return for it. The extra chair by the dinner table was gone as well, likely to distract her from the space it held for Natsu.
Lucy closed the door behind him and crossed her arms, leaning against it. “So?” she prompted, her tone guarded but not cold. How was she so calm? No, that wasn’t fair of him. She was probably experiencing the same internal emotional whirlwind that he was: she had just been able to practice hiding it.
Natsu took a deep breath. His fists clenched at his sides as he met her gaze.
“Can… we sit?”
Lucy hesitated for a moment, her eyes narrowing slightly, as if trying to decide whether she wanted to let this conversation happen. Finally, with a small nod, she gestured to the couch.
“Sure,” she said, her tone clipped. “Go ahead.”
Natsu moved toward the couch but paused before sitting. The cushions were the same ones he’d sprawled out on countless times, but now they felt alien, like he didn’t belong here anymore. He glanced over his shoulder at Lucy, who had yet to move from the door. She watched him silently, her arms still crossed.
“You can sit too,” he mumbled, his voice faltering.
Her lips pressed into a thin line, but after a moment, she pushed off the door and walked over, sitting in the armchair opposite him instead. The distance between them felt vast, and Natsu couldn’t tell if it was the physical space or the emotional wall she had carefully raised.
“So,” Lucy said, breaking the silence. Her tone was sharper now, though not unkind. “What do you want to talk about, Natsu?”
He fidgeted, running his hand through his messy hair and pulling at the fraying ends of his scarf. Words fought to form in his throat, but they all felt wrong, inadequate. He lowered his gaze to the floor, his voice barely above a whisper.
“I wanted to say I’m sorry.”
Lucy let out a soft, humorless laugh. “For what?”
Her response caught him off guard. He looked up, startled, and found her staring at him, her expression unreadable but her eyes sharp.
“For everything,” he said quickly, his words tumbling out in a rush. “For leaving, for not talking to you, for… messing everything up.” His fists clenched on his lap. “I didn’t know how to deal with stuff, and I – I hurt you. I know I did. And I’m sorry.”
Lucy didn’t respond immediately. She leaned back in the chair, her fingers tracing the armrest as she studied him.
“You’re right,” she said finally, her voice quieter now, tinged with a sadness she couldn’t fully mask. “You did hurt me. But you also left me with no explanation. Do you even know what that felt like, Natsu?”
“I-” He started to speak but stopped. His throat tightened, and he looked down again, unable to meet her gaze. “I’m sorry, you gotta understand that I’m bad with words, I-”
“Do I?” She cut in, her voice cutting his heart open. “Do I always have to understand? Because honestly, Natsu? That’s not fair.”
He looked up at her in dismay. She looked like she was fighting tears. Did he really make her feel like this? He wanted to die. Gulping hard, he shook his head.
“N-no. Of course you don’t. That’s…” his voice mellowed out. “... my fault.”
Lucy didn’t answer. She was still waiting for his explanation – why he was here, why he’d found another girl and now didn’t seem to have her in his head anymore. She was still so confused.
“I don’t think I can give you an explanation you want to hear,” he carefully laid out, observing Lucy’s cautious body language. “I just… wanted to feel normal. Everyone else experienced romance, I was… jealous, I think. But I didn’t dare to approach you about it. You’re so… perfect. I’m disgusting in comparison.”
His eyes darted around the room, not daring to stay in one place for longer than a second. He avoided Lucy completely, missing how her heart dropped with his self deprecating words.
“I have impure desires, and I thought that… maybe, just maybe, I could handle those on the side, while still being with you. I never wanted our relationship to change. It’s always been too important. I didn’t want to jeopardize it.”
Natsu shifted uncomfortably on the couch, his fingers gripping the edge of his scarf like it might hold him together. He opened his mouth to speak, then shut it again, glancing down at his hands as he twisted the fabric tighter. His foot tapped against the floor in an uneven rhythm, filling the silence Lucy was yet to break.
“Did…” Her voice cracked. “Did you love her?”
Natsu froze again at her question. The air in the room felt like it had thickened, pressing down on him with all the weight of everything unspoken. He opened his mouth to answer, but the words felt like they were stuck in his chest. Did he love her? He thought he did at the time – hell, he was sure of it. It felt like the right answer, the right thing to say. But now, at this moment, the truth was much harder to pinpoint.
“I-” Natsu’s voice caught, and he quickly shook his head. “I thought I did. I thought I loved her... at first. It felt like... like something real. Something I’d never felt before.”
Lucy’s gaze softened, but her arms remained crossed, as though holding herself together against the uncertainty in his words. “But you don’t know now, do you?”
“I... don’t.” He ran a hand through his hair, frustration building inside him. “It’s hard to explain. With her, it felt intense, and passionate... like I was... alive, you know? But it wasn’t the same as with you. Not like this.”
Lucy leaned forward slightly, her eyes watching him with careful understanding. “Natsu,” she said gently, “forgive me if I’m wrong, but I think that that wasn’t love. That was infatuation. It probably felt intense because it was new, and because you were looking for something you thought was missing. But… I don’t think it was love.”
Natsu stared at her, his chest tight as he absorbed her words. “I... I thought I loved her,” he said quietly, his eyes darting to the floor. “But now... I don’t even know what love is, really.” He shifted uncomfortably, his voice trailing off.
Lucy exhaled slowly, her gaze hardening slightly. “Natsu,” she began, her voice quiet but firm, “I understand you felt something for her. But... what you felt, whether it was infatuation or... lust... it isn’t something you need to hide or be ashamed of. It doesn’t make you a bad person. But it’s not love.” She paused, her expression unreadable. “Love... love is deeper. It’s not just about attraction, it’s about connection. About seeing the worst of someone and still choosing to be there. I don’t think you understand that yet.”
Natsu’s eyes flickered down, and he clenched his jaw. 
“I know it’s different with you,” he said quietly. “I thought I loved her. I... did love her, I guess. But now... I’m not even sure what that was.” He took a breath, frustration building inside him. Why was this so damn complicated? He’d dug his grave and now he had to lie in it. “With you, I always knew it was different. I knew what I felt for you wasn’t like that. It wasn’t just about the physical stuff. It’s always been… more. But I was scared... okay? I was scared that I’d ruin all we had.”
“What left is there to ruin though, Natsu?” She was soft spoken, but frank. Natsu knew she was right: he knew his rendezvous meetings with her had crumbled what he had hoped he and Lucy could keep. He messed up.
Lucy’s arms tightened across her chest, her face softening but still distant. “You didn’t need to be perfect, Natsu,” she said, her voice colder than before. “I never needed that from you. But you can’t keep pretending everything’s fine when you’re running from everything you feel. That’s not fair to me. It’s not fair to you.”
Natsu’s eyes snapped up, guilt and frustration swirling in his chest. “I know,” he said, voice raw, like every word was a struggle. “I know I screwed up. I just... I couldn’t deal with it. I couldn’t face it.” His fists clenched at his sides, the tension in his shoulders tight.
Lucy’s expression softened slightly, but her eyes were still wary. “You’re facing it now though. That’s more than I can say that I’ve done. I’m sorry for not catching… all of this… earlier.” She took an airy breath before she continued. “You haven’t ruined everything though,” she added slowly, her tone quieter now, but still carrying weight. “But if you don’t stop running, I don’t know what’ll be left to fix.”
Natsu’s breath hitched, and for the first time, he felt the weight of her words sink in. He leaned forward slightly, meeting her gaze directly. “I’m not perfect, Lucy,” he muttered, voice rough with regret, but there was a determination in his eyes. “But I want to try. If you’ll let me.”
Natsu’s words hit her like a physical blow, but Lucy swallowed the sting before it could show. She tried to steady herself, to push past the emotion that was threatening to rise, but her chest felt tight. He was so honest, so vulnerable in a way she hadn’t seen in what felt like forever. It was painful, but somehow, it was also... familiar.
“I didn’t just miss you, Natsu,” she finally whispered, voice thick with an emotion she couldn’t name. She hesitated, her hands unconsciously tightening into fists at her sides. “I missed… us. I missed the stupid little things we used to do. And it hurts. God, it hurts. Because every time I saw your face after everything, it felt like... like my heart was pulled in two.” She didn’t look at him, instead pointing her gaze at the floor, as if the weight of her own words was too much to face. “I didn’t know how to keep going without you in my life. And now... I don’t know where we’re supposed to go from here.”
Natsu stood still, the guilt in his chest growing heavier with each word. He wanted to speak, to apologize, but nothing felt like it could make up for the emptiness he had left behind. How could he explain to her that he never meant for it to go this far? That he had been terrified of facing what he felt for her?
“Lucy,” he started softly, his voice strained with the weight of regret. “I messed up. I was scared of... everything. Scared of not being enough for you, scared of losing what we had. I didn’t know how to deal with what I was feeling, so I... ran. Tried to find it elsewhere. I know that doesn’t excuse anything, but I never wanted to hurt you. I didn’t know things would end up like this.”
Lucy slowly looked up at him, her expression unreadable for a moment, then she sighed. “Natsu, I get that you were confused,” she said, her voice quieter, more guarded. “But you still chose her. And that’s not something I can just forget. I wanted us to do so many things. But you weren’t there. You weren’t there for me.” Her shoulders slumped slightly, the weight of her own hurt sinking in. “I just... I don’t know if I can go back to that. I don’t know if I can trust that you won’t… replace me again.”
The tension between them thickened, and Natsu swallowed hard, his stomach twisting. He opened his mouth, but the words wouldn’t come. He hadn’t known how to be vulnerable before; he didn’t know how to start now, not with the mess he had made of everything.
Lucy continued, her voice softer now, but her gaze still wary. “You weren’t perfect. I didn’t need you to be perfect, Natsu. I just needed you to be here. And you weren’t.” She let out a shaky breath, and for the first time, Natsu saw the weariness in her eyes, the raw exhaustion of someone who had been holding on for too long. “I don’t know if I’m ready to try again. I don’t know if you’re ready, either.”
The words stung more than he’d expected. He had wanted to make it right, to find a way back to her, but he didn’t know if she could ever feel the same way again. If she could find it in her to forgive him: get over his mess up. Still, he wasn’t ready to let go. Not yet.
“I want to try,” he said, his voice low but firm, his eyes never leaving hers. “I’ll prove it to you. Please.”
The silence between them stretched, thick and suffocating, like it was waiting for them to figure out how to breathe again. Natsu’s chest was tight, his heart hammering in his ribcage like it had never known stillness. His hands clenched at his sides, unsure of what to do with all this feeling that had nowhere to go.
Lucy’s gaze stayed fixed on him, the distance between them too much, but too little. She didn’t pull away, not physically. But her eyes were guarded, like they always were now, like she was still trying to keep herself safe. Natsu wasn’t sure what he was doing, but the need to reach for her, to close the space, was so overwhelming he could barely think straight.
His breath hitched, and before he could second-guess it, his body moved forward, drawn to her like he had been all those months ago. There was a hesitation in her eyes, a softness to the way she looked at him that he hadn’t seen in so long. It was like she was still here, in a way he hadn’t expected. That didn't make everything okay of course. She was still hurt, still unsure, but there was something flickering in the way her lips parted slightly as he moved closer.
And then he kissed her.
It wasn’t anything spectacular. It wasn’t smooth or fluid or anything that could undo the mess they’d made. It was desperate, almost clumsy, two people trying to find something familiar in a sea of unfamiliarity. His lips brushed against hers, too hesitant at first, like he was afraid he would break her if he pressed too hard. But the feeling was there, just underneath everything, unrefined. The taste of her, the touch of her, something that felt so real it almost made him dizzy.
When they pulled away, the world around them still felt heavy. Lucy didn’t look at him at first, her gaze somewhere far away. But when she did, her eyes were a mix of things – of confusion, of hurt, of something that felt like relief, all tangled together.
“I’m not... not ready,” she whispered, voice trembling, tears filling her eyes. “I don’t know if I ever will be. But I can’t... I can’t pretend like I don’t feel something, too. I don’t want to let go.”
The words rose anxiety in his chest as it stung sharper than anything he ever experienced before. But it wasn’t rejection. Not really. She wasn’t telling him to leave, to forget everything. She was telling him that they were both still stuck in this. She was still afraid to fall into it, but she wasn’t pushing him away.
Natsu’s throat tightened, and for a moment, he couldn’t find the words. The guilt of what he had done – of hurting her – was still heavy, suffocating, but at least there was a chance now. A chance to do something different, to prove that he was willing to face whatever came next, no matter how hard it was.
“I don’t know what happens next,” he murmured, his voice rough. “But I’m here. I want to try. I won’t... I won’t give up on us.”
Lucy’s breath caught. There was a flicker in her eyes, a tiny thing that reminded him of the way she used to look at him – soft, but strong, and maybe a little broken. She didn’t know what to say, either, but she could see the sincerity in his eyes, the unwavering determination there, and something in her, something deep inside, softened. She didn’t have all the answers, but she knew one thing: she wanted this.
“I’m not sure either,” she said quietly, her voice calm now, steady. “But I know we can figure it out. We’ll work through it. Together.”
And in that moment, Natsu felt the weight of her words, the promise layed out in front of them. They weren’t whole yet, they weren’t where they used to be, but the foundation was still there – strong, despite everything. They had something real.
And as they sat there, just a little closer than before, Natsu realized that maybe the future wasn’t so uncertain after all. They had a long road ahead of them, sure, but they’d walk it together.
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birdy-babe · 29 days ago
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How much do you think it hurt Stolas to treat Blitzo this way even as pretend?
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Think about it: the last time they had spoken was apology tour. Then Stolas shows up and spews all this about Blitzo and Imps, expecting to be executed. He knew there was a chance that he would never be able to explain himself to Blitzo, but saving Blitzo was still worth it.
There was a chance that Blitzo would fall for it too, that IMP would fall for it too. And then Stolas would die being seen that way by all of them.
And it must have hurt him too, having to say all these things about Blitzo, to hurt him in a way he knows Blitzo’s been hurt before. To touch him roughly and cast him away-
But it was always worth it. No matter the outcome, he saw the man he loved in danger and would do anything to save him. Any consequences would be worth it as long as Blitzo was okay in the end <3
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maskedbyghost · 29 days ago
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Shadows of Obsession
TW: stalking, home invasion, emotional manipulation, obsessive behavior, Simon in his stalker era
The first bouquet of lilies appeared on her doorstep two months ago, crisp and white, with no note attached. At first, she thought it was a mistake. Maybe a neighbor’s anniversary or a delivery error. She even asked around, but no one claimed them.
The second bouquet arrived the following Friday, just as pristine and silent.
By the fifth, unease began to settle in.
Then came the notes.
The handwriting was precise, the words simple: “You looked beautiful today.” “The world doesn’t deserve your kindness.” “I see you.”
She told yourself it was harmless, a misguided admirer, nothing more. But deep down, she knew better. Each note felt like a pair of eyes on her back, a shadow stretching too close.
Simon was the last person she suspected.
She didn’t know him well—no one did. He was a phantom, his face always hidden beneath that mask. She’d worked with him a handful of times, enough to catch glimpses of a sharp mind and a colder demeanor. He was a man of few words, fewer smiles, and no visible vulnerabilities.
Yet somehow, he had decided she were his.
It started subtly: a fleeting glance that lingered too long, his voice softening when he spoke her name. Then the coincidences—running into him during her evening walks, finding him already at the café she frequented. Always nearby, always watching.
She tried to ignore it, brushing off the unease with excuses. But tonight, all those excuses evaporated.
She woke to silence, the kind that presses down on her chest and suffocates. Something was wrong. Her apartment, usually filled with the ambient hum of life, felt still.
Her eyes adjusted to the darkness, scanning the room. The shadows were where they should be, the clutter untouched. Yet the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end.
And then she heard it: a faint creak of a floorboard, too deliberate to be a trick of the wind.
Her pulse surged as she reached under her pillow, fingers brushing against the knife she’d started keeping there. She slipped out of bed, her movements careful, her breathing shallow.
The hallway stretched before her, the faint glow of streetlights filtering through the blinds. She followed the sound, each step a battle against the growing dread coiling in your stomach.
When she reached the living room, she froze.
Simon stood there, his skull mask catching the faint light. He was utterly still, a predator who had been waiting for his prey to notice him.
“Simon,” she breathed, the name heavy with disbelief and fear.
He turned slowly, his movements measured. His hands hung at his sides, empty, but his presence was suffocating.
“You weren’t supposed to wake up,” he said, his voice low, almost regretful.
Her grip tightened on the knife. “What the hell are you doing in my apartment?”
He took a step toward her, his head tilting as if she’d asked a question he didn’t quite understand. “Keeping you safe.”
“By breaking in?!” Her voice shook, anger and fear warring within you.
“You don’t understand,” he said, his tone soft. “You don’t see how exposed you are. How vulnerable. The world isn’t kind to people like you.”
Her stomach churned. “You’ve been watching me, haven’t you? The flowers, the notes—they were from you.”
Simon didn’t deny it. Instead, he stepped closer, his gaze boring into her. “Everything I’ve done was to protect you.”
“Protect me?” you spat. “You’re the one I need protecting from!”
His jaw tightened, and for a moment, something flickered behind the mask—hurt, maybe. “I’d never hurt you,” he said firmly.
“Then leave.”
Silence stretched between them for a moment. When he finally spoke, his voice was almost pleading. “You don’t understand, love. I see what’s out there. I’ve seen what happens to people who don’t have someone looking out for them. You need me.”
“No, I don’t!” Her voice cracked, but the knife in her hand didn’t waver.
Simon’s gaze dropped to the blade, then back to her eyes. Slowly, deliberately, he stepped closer. She pressed herself against the wall, the cold seeping into her skin.
“You won’t use that,” he said. “You don’t need to. I’d never let anything happen to you.”
“I don’t trust you.”
He leaned in, his breath ghosting over her skin. “You will.”
The weight of his words settled over her like a shroud. She didn’t know whether to scream, fight, or collapse under the realization that Simon wasn’t going anywhere.
part 2
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what do we think babess??
@daydreamerwoah @spicyspicyliving @blackhawkfanatic
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skipper1331 · 9 months ago
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Secret // Alexia Putellas
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| Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | extra |
Everybody knew that Alexia was a private person - she only shared the information she wanted to share as she was very selective in her choice of words and very careful about whom she told what.
And even though that facade dropped around her friends and family, she still kept you a secret - she preferred it that way - having you to herself and not having to deal with headlines like 'Alexia Putellas dating her Barcelona teammate.' and the drama that it could cause.
Whenever it was just the two of you she was the sweetest girl, treating you like a princess and being totally in love with you while when other people were around, she kept her distance, acted strictly professional and didn‘t show any signs of affection.
The only person who knew about you was her sister, Alba and she only found out by accident.
-
"mi amor, you‘re so beautiful" the midfielder admired, kissing along your jaw, "I can‘t get enough of you" she found her way down to your neck, completely lost in the feeling of you before a certain spot on your neck caught her attention where she gently created reddish marks.
Just because nobody knew about you, didn’t mean that it would stop Alexia from silently claiming you.
Her fingertips ran along your exposed skin as your shirt had riddled up, leaving the midfielder craving for more.
The Barcelona player continued to mumble sweet nothings, planting some last even sweeter kisses on your neck before she reached up to your lips, kissing them with every ounce of love. Alexia always kissed you like that, letting you know that you caused the butterflies in her stomach.
Tugging on your shirt, she signaled that she wanted it off. Happily obeying, you took it off, her hands now wandering around your bare upper body as she was back kissing you with so much passion and love.
"Ale- do you know what-" both of you froze at the same time, your girlfriend shielding your exposed body as her sister stood in the door frame, "oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!" she covered eyes, rushing out of the room and slamming the door shut.
"mierda!" Ale was off of you in an instant, throwing your shirt back to you.
"I‘m Alba!" the younger Putellas called threw the door, "we haven‘t meet yet. I‘m her sister!"
You chuckled - wrong move as Alexia glared at you, marching out of her bedroom.
"Do you ever knock?!" she said angrily, pulling her sister away, giving you the time you needed.
"I thought you were asleep! You didn‘t open the front door when I knocked" the sister defended herself in their mother tongue.
Alexia huffed, pinching the bridge of her nose, "so, who‘s she?" Alba asked.
Perfectly timed, you exited the bedroom, walking towards the sisters in the living room, "I’m Y/N" you smiled nicely, offering your hand.
"Alba" she introduced herself once again, returning your smile and shaking your hand.
"She‘s my girlfriend" the midfielder huffed, annoyed that her little sister caught you, "20€ if you don‘t tell anyone about it" the older one said.
She would pay money to keep you a secret? Don‘t get me wrong, you didn‘t want to be public as you loved the privacy both of you had as individuals and together but you did hope for that she would at least tell your friends and family. All you wanted was to hold her hand and not to worry about standing too close to her.
The sparkle in your eyes died down, feeling stings in your heart but nonetheless respecting Alexia‘s wishes.
"I don‘t need your money" Alba stated when she saw the way your face fell, "you could have just said please."
You felt more than rejected in that moment.
"You won‘t tell anybody about this" she ordered this time now, her jaw clenched and voice firm - captains order.
Alba walked towards the door, "I‘m going to the car, mamá is waiting. Hurry up" before she left, only Alexia and you left in her apartment.
"I‘m sorry amor, I forgot that we were having lunch together." the midfielder explained, not knowing nor realizing that her behavior had hurt you as she was just apologizing for the incident of Alba walking in.
"You can stay if you‘d like" she smiled, putting on her shoes.
After she had laced her last shoe, she pulled you in by your hips, kissing you good bye, getting a bit carried as the feeling of your lips locked was addicting.
-
You loved being Alexia‘s girlfriend but you didn‘t like being her secret.
To be honest, it didn‘t bother you at first but after 6 months, you started to think about at least telling your family (officially you hadn‘t even met Alba before) and friends but every time you proposed the idea of it, she got defensive and annoyed, so you didn‘t bring it up again.
After one year, you slowly started to think that maybe she was ashamed of being seen with you, just being with you or of you as her behavior got more and more secretive day by day - she didn‘t even act like your friend in training.
You didn‘t know where it was coming from because whenever you were behind closed doors, she was the most affectionate person who loved to cook for you or just sharing the same air made her heart and brain go love sick. She was indeed very much in love with you yet afraid to show this love outside of either of your apartments.
Sometimes you wished that she would take you out for dinner - it didn‘t have to be fancy at all, McDonalds would be simply enough - you just wanted to experience a date night.
And even though, she made home as romantic as possible, it wasn’t enough anymore. You craved for more.
Sometimes when you saw Ingrid and Mapi openly in love, you felt jealous. You wanted that too.
They were your friends and you were so happy for them as they matched each other perfectly but you couldn’t help but feel envy. You envied what they have, imagining how it would feel like with Alexia - hoping to have that with Alexia, one day.
-
"Do you want to go out tonight? Frido told me about this new restaurant!" you said smiling.
The midfielder looked up from her notebook, pausing the tv as she replayed Chelsea’s matches (the club Barcelona would face in the uwcl semi finals)
"Is it takeout?" she asked.
You shook your head - no. "We can go out" you tried again, flopping next to her on the couch.
"Amor!" she grumbled as all her notes fell to the ground, now not sorted anymore.
"Sorry"
"I‘m preparing for our upcoming matches, you should join me in fact, so you know how Chelsea will play. We can order takeout - you know I don‘t like going out with you" she sorted through her notes, grumbling and huffing at the non existing order. She hadn‘t realized that her words were harsh and in fact rude.
You got the message - she didn’t like going out(side) with you, she had made that very clear.
"I can get you some food from there tomorrow" she added, her voice gentle and the wrinkle between her brows gone as her notes were back in the correct order.
It didn‘t help though, you felt hurt. Was it that bad to be seen with you? You‘re a Barcelona player, her teammate - and friends get food together all the time, so why can‘t you get food together as friends? Nobody would suspect that the two of you were more than friends, right?
"Are you hungry? Do you want me to cook something for you, mi amor?"
Again, you shook your head, scrolling through your phone while you acted tough and unbothered by her comment as she didn‘t even notice how harsh her words had sounded before.
You sent a message in the group chat with Ingrid and Frido, asking if they wanted to try out the restaurant which the Swedish woman had discovered. Both of them agreed within seconds.
-
The two of you laid in bed, Alexia‘s arms wrapped around you as she whispered sweet nothings in your ear. It became a routine for Alexia to lull you to sleep while tracing patterns along your skin. She loved doing so and she loved watching you sleep - you looked at peace.
Something about tonight was different though. Normally, it wouldn’t take long for the captain to soothe you to sleep but after 30 minutes, you still were awake, mind seemingly not finding any rest.
"¿Qué pasa?" she whispered in the dark, gently pressing a kiss to the exposed skin on your shoulder.
"It‘s been over a year, Ale, when will you introduce me as your girlfriend? Or take me out on a date that isn’t in here?" your voice was almost inaudible. You knew it was a sensitive topic for Alexia, the girl always denying your requests on telling someone and shutting you out after the conversation and also avoiding you for the rest of the day. "Amor.. we‘ve talked about this" she said, pulling her hands off your body.
Coldness hit your body while the parts were her hands had rested burnt down.
You turned around, looking at her, the moonlight the only light source "all I’m asking is for some recognition." you admitted, almost pleading for her attention outside of either of your homes.
"But I see you. I see you in training and after training, why is it so important to you that people now? We won‘t have any privacy!" her voice raising slightly.
"Alexia… this has nothing to do with the media. I want to meet your family! Or go on a date and wear very nice clothes. Is that too much to ask for?"
"You‘re right. Lo siento, amor" her hands cupped your cheeks, resting her forehead against yours, "I‘ll try to be better"
-
Over the next few months, Alexia’s home started to become your least favourite place - you felt like you were trapped in a cage.
Nothing had changed.
She loved you behind closed doors while she couldn’t even look at you in training.
Each day that passed, more of your heart broke. Your motivation faded - football was your work and no longer a passion.
And Alexia could tell. Your passes were sloppy and your tackles were harsh.
As soon as you had arrived in her apartment, she began complaining about your attitude.
You were not having it.
You started yelling at each other, rude comments leaving both of your mouths,
"You promised me!" you shouted, all hidden anger and hurt discovering the surface, "you promised me and nothing has changed! I‘m your dirty little secret!" you spat.
"Alba knows about you, isn’t that enough?!"
"You offered her fucking money to keep her mouth shut!"
"What do you want?!"
"I can‘t do this anymore, Alexia. I don’t want to think about whether my girlfriend is ashamed of me or not."
"What are you talking about- amor?"
"I‘m worth more than that."
"Please- give me a chance"
"I did, Ale, more than once" you walked towards the front door, bending down to put on your shoes.
The captain followed, so overwhelmed by what was happening that her persona took some turns, "If you walk out that door, we‘re done!"
your hand was resting on the doorknob, ready to leave.
You looked at her, "Behind that door, we never existed anyway."
And with that being said, you left.
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initialchains · 11 months ago
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teenage dirtbag, baby! | luke castellan
pairing: luke castellan x fem!reader
summary: there is nothing more exhausting than being known as the picture perfect daughter of aphrodite… luckily, camp half-blood’s resident teenage dirtbag luke castellan can’t relate at all. fake dating him to piss off your siblings and mother could never go wrong, right? (based on 18 by anarbor)
wc: 6.5k
warnings: smoking, mentions of drinking, mentions of drugs, mentions of sex, implied sexual content, drew tanaka being a bitch, and kinda ooc luke bcs hes meant to be well … a teenage dirtbag.
a/n: its still valentine’s day for me sooo happy valentines 💌💗 !! in mexico valentine’s day is also known as the day of friendship so this one is dedicated to my favorite people ever: @emiliehornby @love-that-we-were-in and @kestisvrse <3 !! hope you enjoy it mwah !!
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The sounds of campers laughing and gossiping in the dining pavilion are drowned out by your siblings and their annoyingly loud whispers about the allegedly cute (you’d beg to differ) son of Ares who joined camp less than twelve hours ago. Sure, he seemed like a nice guy even though he's a child of the god of war, but you were certain the only reason they kept bringing him up was because they wanted to set you up with him.
“And his arms, oh my gods! Have you seen them?” one of your brothers chimed in, trying to get you to agree with him, but all you could come up with was a hum and a polite smile. 
It pissed you off a bit, the knowledge of you never being able to go against your siblings' wishes.. the fear of disappointing them and your mother being all-consuming and blinding you with fear.
There were times you’d think about it if you’re being honest. Times where you would let yourself dream of doing something so stupidly reckless for once. Something that would stop your siblings from walking all over you and treating you like their personal lapdog. 
Not only was it tiring but it was also humiliating to a certain point. You were older than most of them and you were pretty sure you were the only one that took being a demigod seriously, even taking your time to strategize for Capture The Flag with Clarisse, and yet… you rejected Chiron when he asked you to be a counselor and told him to ask Silena instead. 
And you loved your family—you really did, but it was getting exhausting. Always having to be perfect was draining you and you were afraid of the kind of person you’d become if you allowed this to keep going. 
“He totally wants to ask you out,” Silena’s voice snapped you out of the daze you were trapped in. You turned your head to the right, facing your half-sister with a small frown on your face.
“You really think so?” you replied, trying your best to sound excited. 
“Oh, I know so,” she answered before going on a whole rant about how cute you’d look with the newly claimed son of Ares. A son of Ares—that you badly wanted to remind her—had only been in camp for less than twelve hours and you knew nothing about. 
You stayed in the dining pavilion with your siblings until you found the strength to tell them you were tired and wanted to go to sleep (an incredibly blatant lie but it didn’t look like they cared) and stood up, brushing the dust off your jeans.
“Wait, I’ll go with you!” Silena said with a smile, standing up and moving closer to you. 
“You don’t have to. You can stay with them if you want to, really—“ you were cut off by your half-sister with an exasperated sigh.
“I want to go with you. Plus, I can walk back here once I drop you off at the cabin,” she stated with a playful roll of her eyes.
The two of you walked back to the Aphrodite cabin in a comfortable silence. You liked being with Silena, she was a few years younger than you but she carried herself with so much grace and love it was hard to feel uncomfortable or weird whenever you hung out with her.
You kept your gaze on the sky, noticing that the moon was out by now. “Hey,” Silena whispered, trying to get your attention.
“You okay?” you answered. Your mind was practically hardwired to always look after your siblings, so your brain was unwillingly making you think of the worst-case scenario.
“What? Yeah, I am okay,” Silena was quick to reassure you, “I just wanted to talk to you about—“
“I swear to all the gods, Silena. If this is about that camper..” you replied with a small sigh. The two of you stopped walking when you reached your cabin, deciding to continue the conversation outside.
“He’s not that bad! He is a nice guy and the two of you would look really cute together,” she insisted.
“You don’t even know him.”
“Ugh, fine. Good thing is there are other cute campers we can introduce you to. I met one of Charlie’s brothers a few weeks ago and I think he’d—“
“I can’t do this tonight,” you replied in an exhausted tone.
“Wow, okay. No need to be mean about it,” Silena muttered.
“I’m sorry?”
“I’ve been trying to help you find a boyfriend for months now and you always shut me down. It was fine at first but now you’re just being mean,” she explained.
“Mean? Silena, you said it yourself. I’ve always shut you down because I’m not interested in getting one.”
“Whatever,” she replied bitterly before turning around and walking back to the dining pavilion, leaving you alone outside of your cabin. 
You stared at her back as she walked away, going through the last few minutes over and over in your head. Were you being mean? All you did was stick up for yourself. You didn’t understand why you were feeling bad for standing up against your siblings just for once.
A snort made you realize you weren’t alone. You turned your head towards the noise just to be met with.. oh.
Luke Castellan was leaning against the side of your cabin, carefully hidden under the darkness of the night and the shadows of the trees, he had a cigarette in his right hand and an obnoxious smirk adorning his even more obnoxious face. 
“Hope you enjoyed the show, Castellan.”
Luke raised his hands as if he had been caught and blew the smoke away, “I’m on your side, she was being a fucking bitch.”
“Don’t call her that, she’s just a kid.”
Luke raised a brow before taking another drag of his cigarette, “Do not call your sister a bitch after seeing her.. be a bitch to you?” he shook his head. “Oh, princess, you need to work on getting rid of that altruism.”
“Do you even know what that word means?” you snapped, not being in the mood to indulge in whatever it was he wanted to talk about.
“Why? You want to teach me?” He said with a smirk.
“Don’t even start with your annoying stuff, Castellan,” you muttered, running a hand down your face, clearly overwhelmed with everything that had happened. 
“Because you know you won’t want me to stop?” he pressed, but after a moment of silence his smirk fell and a frown took over his features. 
“Uh.. you want to...” he trailed off and cleared his throat, “you want to talk about it or something?” 
You squinted at him before eventually letting out a sigh and walking over to Luke, standing next to him with your back pressed against the wooden walls of your cabin. Luke extended his arm away from you to keep the smoke far from your face. 
“So, um... Silena wants to set me up with that new camper,” you started.
“Fuck. The Ares one?” Luke interrupted.
“Castellan.”
“Right, sorry. Please continue, princess.”
You decided to ignore the insufferable pet name he gave you and continued, “The thing is I do want a boyfriend, just not… him.”
Luke hummed before bringing the cigarette to his lips again and inhaling the smoke in, he kept his mouth closed as he thought of something decent to say before slightly tilting his head away from you and blowing out the smoke upwards. 
“Alright, and have you tried telling her to stop?” he cut himself off and shook his head. “Nope that was shitty advice, have you tried maybe describing your type or whatever it is you Aphrodite people say to describe the people you’re attracted to.” 
“My type?” you replied, almost offended by the statement.
“Yeah?” Luke answered as if it was the most obvious thing to do, “Just describe the type of guys you’re into and I’m sure that cult of yours you like to call siblings will be happy to help…” he trailed off when he noticed your gaze set on his right hand and your bottom lip in between your teeth as he flicked the cigarette, causing the ashes to fall into the ground. 
He looked up from his hand and burst out into laughter, shaking his head before whispering an amused fuck. 
“Oh?” Luke said with a bright smile and raised brows, “You find this attractive, angel?” 
“That thing is going to kill you,” you explained, “I’m not attracted to people that like to slowly kill themselves.” 
“Fucking bummer. I wanted to see you take a drag, that would’ve been really hot,” he said, his smile not wavering. “Next thing you’re going to tell me is that you don’t drink, right?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Look at you, being such a good girl,” Luke teased before throwing the rest of his cigarette to the ground and stepping on it. 
“Also, that thing you said about Silena being just a kid was really fucking stupid. She’s almost the same age as Annabeth and she doesn’t act like an asshole, I’m pretty sure your sweet little sister is just a bitch.” 
Annabeth. You forgot that even though Luke is an annoyance most of the time and prefers to stick to himself.. he still has a soft spot for the twelve year old daughter of Athena. It was kind of endearing. 
“Annabeth is a daughter of Athena, you can’t expect her to act—“
“You didn’t act like Silena when you were fourteen. You need to stop giving her excuses and allow yourself to get mad at her.” 
“I’d rather have my siblings get mad at me and just stop perceiving me as this perfect and weak person, maybe once that happens they’ll stop trying to mess with my life,” you explained, your gaze set towards the ground. 
Luke was about to open his mouth and try to come up with a funny one-liner to make you feel better, but he didn’t get to because you were quick to look up at him with a gasp and wide eyes.
“The fuck? Are you okay?” 
“I need you.”
“Shit, angel. Most girls say that after a few dates but I’m not against the idea,” he said with an amused look in his eyes. 
“Ew, no. I mean, I need to date you—fake date you.”
“I’m uh... not for sale?” Luke answered, clearly confused by the plan you were trying to explain.
“No, Castellan. Listen to me. My siblings despise you, I’m sure they’d set my bed on fire as a way of cleansing my soul from you if they find out we’re dating.”
Luke’s eyes got bright and his smile widened (if that was even possible), “Set your bed on fire? And what would we do in your bed for them to feel disgusted by its existence?”
“You’re disgusting. Anyway, if we fake date I’ll get to stop being perceived as their perfect sister and you’ll have bragging rights for dating an Aphrodite kid,” you said, moving your hands as you spoke. 
“I’m pretty sure Drew started the rumors about me having lice and smuggling coke into camp, are you sure you want to fake date me of all people?” Luke asked carefully, trying to make you think about what was at stake. He didn’t give a shit about staining his already nonexistent reputation, but he couldn’t have you ruin yours. 
“I am so sure, Castellan,” you reassured him. 
“You know, for a good girl I’m extremely surprised you never say please.”
“Please, Castellan. Could you please be my fake boyfriend so I can finally stop being seen as my siblings' personal toy?” you said with a fake smile while bringing your hands together as an exaggerated way of begging Luke to say yes. 
“You’re so cute when you beg. But you need to prove to me you’re serious about this fake dating thing. Meet me tomorrow at the bonfire, no bullshit.” 
꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱
You had been on edge the entire day. Silena seemed to be past the argument, which made you feel better to an extent, but that didn’t seem to shake the uneasy feeling that settled in your gut because throughout the day you could feel someone staring at you. You could feel Luke staring at you.  
You were walking past the sword fighting arena with Katie Gardner from the Demeter Cabin the first time it happened. The feeling of a pair of eyes completely set on you. You turned your head to the right just to be met with Luke’s exhausted figure, he was sweating and panting, but that didn’t stop him from running his eyes up and down your figure and smiling at you. 
To say Katie was disgusted would be an understatement. A “Castellan is a dick, you should stay away from him,” was enough to stop you from staring at him and turning your head back to Katie. She went on to explain how Luke was a “real shitty person” and only hooked up with her as a way of getting her to grow weed in the back of the stables. 
It happened around eight times in the last two hours (not that you were counting) and it only got worse when the moon came up and everyone was making their way to the bonfire. You were walking next to Michael Yew when you felt a hand on your lower back. 
Luke’s hand on your lower back, to be exact. He left it there as he walked past you, only turning his head back to say “It’s adorable to see you together, are you two a couple?” 
You had to hold yourself back from strangling him when you heard his irritating laugh after he saw Michael’s reaction to his statement. Michael tried his best to be polite and tell him he was wrong, that there was nothing going on between the two of you. 
But his reply only seemed to fuel Luke’s actions even more because all he did was answer with a cocky “Oh, I know. Our princess here is only into... what was it? People that like to slowly kill themselves with cigarettes?” before walking away.
You were going to kill him.
Michael left your side as soon as you arrived, moving to sit with his siblings from the Apollo Cabin… leaving you with two choices: sitting with your siblings or sitting next to Luke (who for some reason always sat alone and spent the entire time listening to the music coming from the MP3 player he somehow managed to get into camp). 
So this is what Luke meant, you thought. This was the only way you could prove to him and everyone that you were serious about dating him—fake dating him—but it's not like they would ever know the truth.
You dragged your feet as you walked towards Luke, clearly having second thoughts about your plan, but there was no turning back now. You tried to ignore the confused look Drew was giving you and the gasps you could hear coming from your siblings. 
“I’m pretty sure Drew started the rumors about me having lice and smuggling coke into camp, are you sure you want to fake date me of all people?” You weren't so sure anymore but that didn’t stop you from taking a seat next to Luke Castellan, who took one of his earphones off and looked at you with a smile. 
“Happy now? I just proved how serious I am about this,” you whispered to him, trying your best to not let anyone hear you.
Luke nodded before saying, “You could’ve done better, but I’ll take it.”
“Done better? I just sat next to you in front of the entire camp, isn’t this good enough for you?” you asked, indignation evident in your tone. 
“Promise not to beat me up?” Luke said before pulling your arm and manhandling your body so you were on top of him, sitting on his lap. He placed his hands on your hips and looked up at you with stars in his eyes.
“Wow, Castellan. How scandalous, I’m sitting on your lap,” you deadpanned. 
He chuckled, bringing you closer to him and pressing his lips against yours. Luke’s hands felt like fire against your skin, all you could feel was a heat taking all over your body as he continued to kiss you, only pulling away to catch his breath before bringing you in for another one, this time he kissed you deeper and faster. 
Luke dragged you closer to him by pressing your hips against his and all you could do was melt into him and the feeling of his lips against yours. In the distance, you could hear gasps and people gagging, and you were pretty sure the campers from the Ares Cabin were cheering and whistling, but all your thoughts were on Luke Castellan and how good of a kisser he is.
You pulled away first this time, trying to steady your breathing as you looked into his eyes. He licked his lips before whispering “We should go.”
Your eyes widened as soon as he said that, the implications of what the sentence meant making you feel nervous. Luke was quick to reassure you, “If we leave, your siblings will be even more outraged. We don’t have to do anything, but they’ll think we are doing…some stuff. Just come to the woods with me for a little while.” 
You nodded and grabbed his hand as he guided you through the woods. You could hear Silena calling out your name and warning you about the consequences of your actions, but her voice was drowned out by the loud cheers coming from Clarisse.
Once the two of you were far enough from the rest of the campers, Luke let go of your hand and sat down by the lake, nodding his head as a way of asking you to join him.
You sat in silence for a few minutes until Luke spoke first. “How long do you think we should keep this thing up?”
“Valentina and Drew will want us to be over by tonight,” you said with a smile, a laugh escaping your lips. You didn’t notice how Luke’s eyes got brighter when he heard your laugh or how the melody that came out of your lips went straight through his heart and made him feel more alive.
“But I think a week should be enough. We can say we’ve been secretly dating for like... five months? That way it won’t be weird if we break up in a week,” you explained while your fingers played with your camp necklace. 
Luke nodded before going silent again, staring at the lake with a look you couldn’t quite comprehend. Your gaze was set on him, your eyes traveling from his toned arms, all the way to the scar that sat right below his right eye. 
“I know it’s awful, I can feel you staring at it,” he murmured. You could physically feel your heart sinking when he said it. You cleared your throat, “No, I… I think it’s beautiful. I think you’re—” Luke turned his head to face you, an inquisitive look in his eyes. “I think you’re really brave, Luke.” 
“Beautiful?” Luke asked, confusion written all over his face. “You should hear what your siblings say about it, then. I’m sure your opinion would change in a second.” 
“Being an Aphrodite kid means you see beauty everywhere,” you explained, “And I think your scar must be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” Luke stared at you with an unreadable expression, making your heart almost beat out of your chest. 
“Are you flirting with me, angel?”
“Of course, you’d ruin the moment. Screw you, man.” You rolled your eyes. 
Luke threw his head back in a fit of laughter, it made you want to strangle him… again. “Did you just say screw you? Gods, princess, saying fuck won’t kill you.” 
“I don’t like to curse, thank you for pointing it out, Castellan,” you said, playfully shoving him, making him fake a gasp. 
“You went from trying to seduce me to trying to kill me, you’re so interesting, angel,” he said before letting out a sigh. “It, uh… It was really hard at first, getting used to the scar.”
“Having people call it all sorts of names, and looking at me with nothing but pity in their eyes was not easy to get used to. But after some time you just… stop caring. I mean, I’m not that big of an asshole to hold a grudge over a fucking scar, it even looks sick. But yeah, when it gets hard again all I can do is snort a line and move on.
“The coke smuggling was real?” you gasped, only focusing on the last sentence he said. Luke tried to keep a straight face but his facade fell the moment he noticed your wide eyes. Luke Castellan has the type of laugh that makes everything get fuzzy and makes you feel lightheaded, and all you wanted to do was to come up with bad jokes just for the sole reason of hearing him do it again. 
“Fuck, you really believe anything, huh?”
“Shut up, Castellan. I’ll literally stab you and let you slowly bleed to death,” you threatened, standing up from your place next to him. Luke followed you as you walked back to the cabins.
“You do know I’m the best swordsman in the last 300 years, right? Do you even know how to wield a sword?” he asked, matching your pace and walking next to you. 
“Low blow, just because I don’t like to indulge in violence it doesn’t mean I don’t know how to wield a sword,” you retorted. 
Luke snorted a laugh, “You don’t know, do you?”
“No, I don’t. Will you shut up now?”
“I only will if you accept to let me teach you how to fight tomorrow,” Luke said with a tilt to his head. He didn’t even give you a chance to answer because he walked away from you while saying a loud “Meet me tomorrow morning in the sword fighting arena.” 
꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱
You were sure you were seconds away from passing out. It's been around two hours of sparring with Luke and your arms and legs were about to give out. The sun was starting to come out, which meant this torture was nearly over. At least that’s what Luke promised. “We’ll stop as soon as the other campers wake up, that way you won’t have to be embarrassed if they see your… skills.”
The two of you circled each other, your swords were raised and Luke’s blade was pointing straight at you. Luke took a second to study your stance before lunging forward, his sword meeting yours as you quickly blocked his attack. “Not too bad, huh?” Luke teased before trying to get another hit, his moves becoming more calculated the longer you kept blocking his advances. Proving he wasn’t called the best swordsman at camp for nothing. 
With a disarming maneuver you weren’t aware of, Luke was quick to throw your sword to the ground and have you stumbling back, not being able to regain your footing. Luke gave you a smirk when your body hit the ground with a small thud, “That was easy,” he said, “We should do this more often.” 
“Nope, this is a one-time thing, Castellan,” Luke rolled his eyes before bringing the blade of his sword closer to you, reaching for your chin with a glint in his eyes. The blade met your chin and Luke lifted it, making you meet his gaze as he slowly made you stand up by raising his sword even higher. 
The two of you stood still, staring intently into each other’s eyes until you heard it—the sound of the Ares Cabin making their way to the arena. Luke let out a surprised shit, dropped his sword to the ground, and walked closer to you, cupping your jaw with his right hand and kissing you. 
Your lips met in a hurried collision, causing the same fire from yesterday to set in your stomach. Your hands moved to Luke’s hair, softly pulling it as the kiss got heated. You knew this was fake, you knew this kiss meant nothing to him… but you didn’t want him to stop. “Holy fuck, are you two always sucking each other’s faces?” Clarisse’s voice cut through the moment, causing you to pull away from Luke, unable to meet his gaze. 
“Yeah, that’s what being in a relationship entails. I don’t think you’d know much about it, La Rue,” Luke breathes out.
“Don’t you have weed to sell or a cheap bottle of vodka to down, Castellan?” 
“Aw, you know me so well,” Luke answered before picking up both of your swords and grabbing your hand, walking away from the arena. 
The following days were (and you hated to admit it) filled with the most fun you’ve ever had. Luke would come up with some insane idea for a fake date and it would always end with one of you lying about seeing a camper or hearing Silena’s voice as an excuse to make out with each other. 
There was this one time the two of you were having a picnic by the strawberry fields and the day ended with the two of you hiding in the empty forge while making out, running your hands over each other’s bodies, and doing the normal stuff fake couples always do… it all happened because Luke swore he heard Valentina’s voice near the fields. (You were sure Valentina had been on the stables that entire day because she had cleaning duty, but why wouldn’t you play along with something you also wanted to do?)  
It was Sunday–the last day of your fake relationship–when Silena finally found the guts to talk to you about Luke. You even felt slightly bad for the girl because she was so nervous when she sat next to you in the dining pavilion. 
“I..um... I just wanted to say I’m sorry,” she began, “Well, there are lots of things for me to apologize for, but I think it’s pretty obvious what the main problem is.” 
“The way I’ve been treating you is not okay and I’m really ashamed of it. You shouldn’t have to feel pressured to be the person we want you to be, I used to see you as someone who couldn’t do things on her own and always needed someone to push her and help her handle everything… and now I see I was wrong,” Silena explained, running a hand through her hair. 
“It’s fine, Silena. I don’t mind.”
“Well, I do. You’re strong and more than capable of doing things on your own, and you don’t need me to try and help you or fix you.” She took a deep breath. “I didn't know you were dating Luke, and to be honest I didn’t even know he was your type. He is so… weird and I never would’ve guessed you were dating. I mean, Drew told me he does cocaine and—”
“He doesn’t,” you interrupted.
Silena raised a brow before continuing, “Anyway, I’m sorry if I ever made you feel bad for just... existing. And you always look so happy after hanging out with Luke, I truly hope the two of you stay together for a long time.” 
You didn’t even know how to explain the situation so you just blurted out “I broke up with him.” 
Silena looked shocked for a few seconds before letting out a deep breath, “Oh, thank the gods. Just because we trust you it doesn’t mean we trust him,” she spat the him with so much disgust it made you feel sick. “You deserve so much better.” 
꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱
This is probably the first time you have ever felt ill at the thought of seeing Luke. Sure, you used to be annoyed by his presence before the whole fake dating situation even started, but at least you were a strange type of friends back then. Not really close but also not complete strangers. There were times you’d catch him hiding his secret stash of weed behind the stables and didn’t tell anyone, and he’d always pay you back by lying to Chiron about you practicing your sword skills with him. (You had only used a sword once and it was years ago when you were still a new camper, you had no idea why Chiron would ever believe him.)
Luke was sitting in his usual spot by the lake, a cigarette in his hand. It had become a tradition for the two of you to always meet up by the lake before curfew to talk about your day and practice your kissing so it wouldn’t look fake. 
“Hey,” you said, taking a seat next to him. Luke threw his cigarette to the ground, stepped on it, and almost instinctively wrapped an arm around your waist, kissing your temple. “Blink-182?” you asked, nodding at the MP3 he had on his lap. 
“The Smashing Pumpkins,” Luke answered, taking his earphones off. “Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness is one of the best albums ever made.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, but I’ll take your word for it,” you said. Luke smiled and poked your side. 
“So, there’s something I need to talk to you about,” you began, but Luke held up his hand as a way to get you to stop.
“Can I say something first?” he asked, looking shy for probably the first time since the day you met him. 
You nodded and let him take the lead of the conversation. “Alright, so… I’m kind of shit with words so I’m sorry if this doesn’t make any sense but this past week has probably been the best week of my life. And I’m not even fucking around, I don’t have many friends–apart from Annabeth, and getting to be with you is the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
“Being your friend is the greatest gift the gods have ever given me, and sometimes I feel like I don’t even deserve it. I’m a mess of a person, and you’re well… you’re you,” Luke stared deeply into your eyes, “And I just wanted to let you know that—”
Luke didn’t get to finish his sentence because this time it was you who cut him off with a kiss. You could taste the cigarette on his lips as he brought you closer to him, running a hand down your back and deepening the kiss before pulling away and moving to kiss your neck. 
Luke began to trail kisses down your throat and only stopped to whisper a low “Look at you, what would Aphrodite say? I’m sure she’d be proud.”
Aphrodite.
You pushed him away the moment you remembered your mother. “Silena apologized. We can stop pretending now.”
Luke was silent and just stared at you, his fingers moving to fidget with the wire of his earphones. “Oh, right,” he cleared his throat. “It’s Sunday, I forgot.”
You knew he didn’t.
“Yup, so we can go back to normal now,” you said, looking away from his eyes because you knew it would only take one look into them for you to kiss him again.
“Good,” Luke stood up, not daring to even shoot you a glance, and walked away. Leaving you alone by the lake with the lingering smell of his cheap stolen cologne mixed with the cigarette he was smoking. 
It didn’t help that you were welcomed into your cabin with hugs and your siblings congratulating you for breaking up with the son of Hermes. Sure, you weren’t the perfect sister anymore because you dated Luke Friendless-Freak Castellan, but knowing they liked you just because you were with him and then broke his heart made you want to set the cabin on fire. 
The main rule of the Aphrodite Cabin was something your siblings were extremely proud of, but the thought of its existence made you want to storm into Mount Olympus by yourself and yell at your mother for putting all these useless ideas into their heads. 
For a child of Aphrodite to prove themselves, they must make someone fall in love with them and then break that someone's heart. 
Is it possible for the rule to backfire? For the child of Aphrodite to accidentally fall in love with someone and then break their own heart because of it? You didn’t even know if that was an option, but you were sure that’s exactly what you were going through right now. 
It was hard for you to go to sleep that night because your mind kept replaying the past week on a loop. Your conversation with Luke by your cabin. The night of the bonfire. The conversation by the lake about his scar. Sparring with him. Going on a million fake dates. The night on the forge. Your last conversation with him. 
“Look at you, what would Aphrodite say? I’m sure she’d be proud.” 
꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱
You could feel Luke staring at you. Again. 
You were helping Annabeth strategize for Capture The Flag, because she had the brilliant idea to have the Athena cabin team up with Hermes and Aphrodite. You didn’t know much about fighting and spent most of the time sitting with your sisters during the game, but that didn’t mean you didn’t enjoy helping them come up with new plans. 
Once the three of you were done, Annabeth excused herself with an awkward “I think Malcolm wanted me to help him go through some maps. You two have fun… chatting!” and left as fast as she could, leaving you alone with Luke. 
You watched her leave the amphitheater and turned around to face Luke, “I can see why you like her. She’s so much like you.”
“Yeah, she’s like my little sister.”
The silence was so uncomfortable you almost broke down crying. You nodded and turned around, not being strong enough to face him, and walked away. You could hear him behind you, following you.
“Can we talk?” he pleaded.
You were about to open your mouth when Drew’s voice made you turn your head. “Gods, Castellan. It’s so embarrassing to still be hung up on your ex.” 
Luke sighed, “Hello to you too, Tanaka.” 
“Can you leave her alone? She doesn’t want to talk to you,” Drew said through a fake smile. 
“Oh, really? Did she tell you that?” Luke answered, tilting his head as he spoke and making eye contact with you. Wordlessly begging you to please talk to him. 
You stayed silent and looked away from him. Luke let out an incredulous laugh before nodding his head. “Good to know you’re back to being their little pet.” 
Drew rolled her eyes and walked away, shoving Luke as she walked past him. “So? You’re just not going to say anything?” Luke said. 
“What do you want me to say, Castellan?” 
“Tell me that last week didn’t mean anything to you,” Luke answered, his voice trembling. 
“Why do you care? I thought I was nothing but Drew’s little pet,” you replied, trying your best to not look weak in front of him.
Luke ran a hand through his hair and stepped closer to you, “I’m sure you’re thinking the exact same thing about yourself.” 
You hated that he was right.
The truth made your blood boil. “I don’t want any of your shit,” Luke let out a genuine laugh this time, a mocking look in his eyes. “Oh, so now she can curse?” 
You hated him for seeing the real you. You hated him for knowing the truth. You hated yourself for loving him.
“Fuck you, Castellan,” Luke hummed before stepping even closer to you and placing a hand on your waist, leaning to whisper in your ear. “I’m sure you’d love to do that again, right?” Luke’s smell was taking all over your senses and making your knees go weak. He continued, “Because even if we do it in the darkness of the Forge… it is still two friends fake dating because your mother might be watching.” 
You found the strength to press your hands against his chest and push him away, “Don’t talk to me ever again.” 
You spent the rest of the day with your siblings and friends, too afraid to leave their side because you didn’t trust yourself. Because you knew that if you were left alone for a second—you’d run straight to him. 
You sat next to Silena in the dining pavilion. Helped Katie and the Dyonisus cabin grow more strawberries by keeping them company. Walked with Michael to the bonfire, and stayed with Drew throughout the entire singalong. 
As always, Luke was sitting by himself, his MP3 player in his hand and his eyes were set on you. 
You walked back to your cabin when the singalong was over and helped your siblings get ready for bed. You were about to go to sleep when Valentina whispered your name, saying she had something for you.
“We found it last night under your bed, Drew wanted to give it to the harpies but I managed to take it away from her,” a frown made its way to your face.”What do you mean?”
“We found this,” She pulled out a badly wrapped gift from under her pillows. You were confused until she told you to open it.
 It was a bright pink MP3 player. 
“Oh,” you whispered, your hands shook as you stared at it. “I’ve got to—”
“It’s okay,” Valentina whispered. “He’s probably by the lake.”
You gave your half-sister a hug before running out of your cabin, and making your way to the lake. You could see Luke’s silhouette in the distance, and the sight only made you run faster.
You took a moment to catch your breath before saying, “The Smashing Pumpkins?”
Luke turned around at the sound of your voice. “Blink-182” he answered with a small smirk.
“Uh, of course,” you said as you walked closer to him. “Alright, listen. You were right.”
“Tell me something I don’t know.”
“Oh, fuck off,” you continued with a smile. “So, it turns out I may or may not be in love with this certain guy, and he may or may not be my type or whatever it is my siblings say.”
Luke took a step closer to you. “There’s a chance this guy thinks I’m going through a phase and only fake dated him to piss off my siblings and mother but the truth is… I don’t even care about them whenever I’m with him.” 
His hand moved to caress your cheek, “That’s cute and all but how does this guy know you truly mean that?” 
“I’m not going to make out with him at the bonfire, so I guess all he needs to do is believe me,” you whispered, your eyes moving from Luke’s eyes to his lips.
Luke smiled before answering, “Believe you? That’s alright with me,” and pressing his lips to yours.
Luke was right. Aphrodite would be proud. 
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theemporium · 1 year ago
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[2.3k] the hour is early, the lakehouse is quiet and luke finally gets a moment to appreciate his pretty girlfriend. (smut)
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Luke Hughes was never a morning person. 
Despite years of playing competitive hockey which resulted in early morning games and even earlier practices, he still despised waking up. He hated when he had to wake up early. He hated when he was woken up early by someone else. He just hated mornings in general, and he was glad when summer break finally came around and he had an excuse to sleep in a little longer than usual.
Which was why it was so odd he was awake—on his own accord—this early in the morning.
He tried to blink away the heavy feeling in his head as he reached for his phone, tapping the screen. His brows furrowed together at the early morning time flashing across his screen before he let out a small groan of annoyance. 
He let out a small huff as he leaned back down on the bed, but despite the sleepiness he felt, he was too awake to just close his eyes and hope he could doze off again.
Luke stared blankly at his ceiling for a few moments, debating his options before he felt you shuffling beside him. He turned his head, seeing you instantly move closer to him like you knew he was awake. 
His lips twitched upwards as he took in the sight of you. This was your first summer at the lakehouse, and he knew all too well how nervous you had been. You were panicked, scared that his family and friends wouldn’t like you—minus Jack who you’d obviously already met. You were scared about packing the wrong clothes, or forgetting something. You were worried you’d make a total fool of yourself. 
As Luke had told you many times, your worries were instantly squashed the second you walked through the door. Everybody made you feel welcome, everybody fell in love with you a little bit just like Luke had. You fit in with the dynamic, and Luke couldn’t help but feel something quite like pride blossom in his chest whenever he saw how well you got on with the people he cared most about in his life. 
And maybe he also enjoyed the fact you left him in charge of packing and he just happened to accidentally forget to pack your pyjamas. 
You had spent the last week just sleeping in his shirts and, fuck, he would be lying if he said he didn’t love it. He liked the way they engulfed you, the way the hem brushed against your thighs and the way he could see your panties peeking under the shirt when you stretched your leg over his. He liked the fact you wore his shirts so proudly, that you liked that hidden possessiveness just as much as he did. 
Before you could even get the chance to move away, he wound his arm around you and pulled you close to him, until you were practically sprawled over his chest. He lifted his hand, softly pushing some of your hair behind your ear as he took the silence of the early morning to just appreciate how fucking pretty you were. 
Despite the months of you two being together, it never failed to amaze him that someone as gorgeous as you were with him. Both inside and out, Luke would forever claim he had never met someone more beautiful than you, and he stood by that—even if it was just to watch the way you’d blush after he’d say it. 
His lips ghosted across your skin, a light but loving kiss placed on your forehead before his arms tightened around you to pull you closer. 
“Hm,” you groaned before nuzzling your face further into his chest. “Stay still.” 
“M’sorry, baby, didn’t mean to wake you up,” he murmured in a soft voice, a flash of guilt hitting him as he watched your face scrunch up. 
“What time is it?” Your words were slurred together, your eyes still firmly shut as you spoke. 
“Too early to be awake,” he grumbled before pressing another kiss to your forehead. “Go back to bed, sleep for another few hours.” 
Your brows furrowed together. “Why are you not asleep?” 
“I don’t know,” he admitted as his hands slid under the hem of your—his—shirt, his long fingers tracing random shapes along your back. “Just woke up, I guess.” 
You frowned a little. “You okay?” 
His lips twitched upwards at your sleepy concern. “Yeah, babe, I’m good. Just go back to bed.” 
“I want you to sleep with me,” you muttered out. 
Luke snorted. “Oh yeah?” 
You let out a small huff of annoyance, softly pinching his side. “Not like that, creep.” 
“You’re the one who said it,” he retorted, knowing full well that if you were properly awake right now, you’d be rolling your eyes at him. 
“Like I’d ever sleep with you,” you retorted, though he could feel the way your smile was pressed against his skin. 
“I think I could convince you,” he murmured as he ducked his head down, kissing a spot just below your ear. 
You shivered slightly. “That was a lucky guess.” 
“Yeah?” His grin widened slightly as his palms spread across your back, warm and smooth against your skin as he maneuvered you until he could duck his head into the crook of your neck and kiss along your skin. “Is this a lucky guess too?” 
“Everyone likes being kissed on the neck,” you said, but your response sounded a little breathier than you cared you admit as you felt his curls tickle your skin. 
“Just your neck?” He questioned, softly humming against your neck as his fingers hooked the neckline of the shirt you were wearing, his kisses trailing along your collarbone towards your shoulder.
“Luke,” you breathed out. “We can’t.”
His teeth lightly scraped against the base of your neck as you arched into him. “Why not?” 
“People will hear us,” you murmured, but the excuse sounded deaf to your own ears.
“Nobody is awake right now,” he told you, and you knew he was right. You two were probably the only ones awake right now, there was no risk of you getting caught. “Just gotta make sure you stay quiet, babe.”
“Luke—oh.”
Your eyes fluttered shut as his hands gripped your waist, turning you around so your back was pressed against his chest. You could feel his body pushed against yours, could feel heart pounding in his chest and his cock straining against the fabric of his pyjama trousers. You could feel everything as his arm wound around your waist, his hand splayed against your stomach.
“Think you can keep quiet?” His lips brushed against your ear as he spoke, low and gruff and, fuck, if it didn’t make you squeeze your thighs together.
“I can be quiet,” you promised, turning your head to the side to try and catch his lips with your own.
His lips twitched upwards as he moved his head back a little, just enough to ghost yours. “Yeah?”
“Yeah—” Your lips parted in surprise as his hand moved south, his palm cupping your cunt in his hand. “Luke.”
“Shhh, thought you were gonna be quiet,” he scolded mockingly as he pressed the heel of his palm against your clit, slow and purposeful moves that made a pretty whimper leave your mouth. “Don’t wanna wake anyone up, do we, babe?”
You shook your head, too scared to talk.
“Fuck, you’re already so wet f’me,” he murmured as he nosed your cheek and jaw, his fingers tracing over your clothed cunt as you squirmed at the light touch.
“Please,” you whispered. 
“Tell me what you need,” he demanded softly. “Say the words, baby.”
“Need you inside me, please,” you whispered as your hand reached behind, curling around his neck until your fingers tangled themselves in his curls. 
“Gonna give my girl whatever she wants,” he said as he nuzzled his face against your neck once again, little nips and bites making you arch back into his embrace as his fingers slid past the waistband of your panties. 
Your mouth fell agape as his fingers pressed against your clit, slowly circling as you wiggled your hips back into him. He lifted his head enough to watch your face as his fingers slid along your wet pussy, your arousal soaking his fingers as he traced up and down your slit.
He watched the way your free hand slapped over your mouth when he finally sunk one finger inside you, feeling the way your walls clenched around him. He watched your eyes flutter close as he slid another finger inside you. He watched as he curled his fingers inside you, hitting that spot that only his fingers seemed to reach as you let out a muffle cry behind your palm.
“Luke, Luke, Luke,” your breathing was shaky as your hand darted down to grip his wrist. “Please.”
“Words, baby, words,” he murmured softly, his lips pressing soft kisses along your cheek and jaw as you tried to form a coherent sentence.
“Wanna come on your cock,” you confessed, turning your head to look up at him with bleary, wet eyes. “It’s been so long, baby, please.”
And that wasn’t an exaggeration in the slightest. Because as much as Luke loved the lakehouse and as much as he loved spending time with the people he cared about, it fucking sucked that he had barely touched you since you both arrived. 
It sucked that there was always somebody in the house. It sucked that he couldn’t take the boat out with you without everyone knowing exactly what he wanted to do. It sucked he couldn’t just go out on a drive with you either. It sucked he couldn't even sneak into the shower with you after Jack got caught doing the same thing with a girl a few years back.
It fucking sucked that Luke had to watch his pretty girlfriend prance around in little bikinis and shorts, and have to keep his hands all to himself.
But here you were with wide eyed and flushed cheeks as you begged for his cock, as you begged to feel him inside you again, as you begged for him.
He could’ve come alone from your voice. But he didn’t want that, and this wasn’t the time for it. He didn’t know how much longer you two would have before someone in the house woke up, he didn’t know how much time he had until it wouldn’t be you two alone in this little dusk bubble, and he didn’t want to waste anymore time.
He pushed the plaid pyjama bottoms down enough to free his cock, gripping his length with the same fingers that were inside you minutes ago. He let out a hushed list of curse words as he stroked himself, nuzzling his body closer to your until he could hook your panties to the side and slowly slide into you.
“Oh shit—” His free hand quickly slammed over your mouth, the noises quiet and muffled as he bottomed out inside you. 
You were tight. So fucking tight and warm around him, and fuck, Luke was prepared to wake up early every day if he got to fuck you like this. He pulled his hips back before thrusting back into you, his eyes fluttering shut as he listened to your muffled moans. 
There was something so intimate about it all. The morning sun starting to filter through the cracks in the curtains, the birds chirping outside and the calming sound of nature accompanying the sound of his hips slapping against your ass as he slowly fucked you. 
“You feel so good,” he groaned, his voice a little whiny as he finally pulled his hand away from your mouth. “Squeezing me so good, baby.”
“Kiss me,” you murmured breathlessly, your body rocking with his thrusts. “Kiss me, please.”
And he couldn’t deny you such a simple demand, not when you were asking so nicely. 
His lips slanted over yours as he kissed you. It was slow and messy and passionate, and he couldn’t help but let out a small groan when he felt your walls clench around him as his tongue pushed against yours. His hands tightened on your hips, his thrusts slower and harder as he felt your body completely sag against his. 
“Shit, that’s it,” he panted against your lips. “Come f’me, honey, just like that.”
The noise you let out was soft and high-pitched when you finally came. Your body tensing and your walls clenching around him as you dug your nails into his forearm. You let out a soft cry as you came, letting the feeling of relief finally wash over you after almost two weeks of wanting nothing more than to jump your boyfriend’s bones.
Luke came soon after you, a few more thrusts before he was spilling inside you. He didn’t have the heart to pull out just yet, his forehead resting against yours as he took a second to try and get air back into his lungs.
“Think we can risk a shower?” You questioned after a few moments of silence, feeling his smile ghost over yours.
“Not a fucking chance,” he grumbled with a small sigh of annoyance. “What’s the rush anyways? Let’s just stay like this.”
“And let Trevor walk in on us like he tries to do every morning?” You commented with a snort. “Not a chance.”
Luke just let out a small whine as he curled his arms around you. “Five minutes,” he murmured in a softer voice. “Please? You feel good.”
“Five minutes,” you conceded. “But don’t fall asleep.”
But Luke was already fighting a yawn as he pressed his face against your shoulder. “Of course not, baby, I’m wide awake.”
“Liar.”
“I’ll make it up to you later.”
“In the shower?”
Luke snorted. “Keep dreaming, babe.”
.
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ellecdc · 9 months ago
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Dude, I read the one where you talked about pregnant reader and you said it'll be a cute fic.... are you really gonna write it!!? Poly moonwater with pregnant reader!?? Will you? Will you? Will you!!?? Please, will you!!!!!???
well.....since you asked so nicely........👀
poly!moonwater x afab fem!reader who finds out she's expecting
CW: mentions of pregnancy, how people get pregnant (nothing discussed in detail, SFW and minors), reader is concerned the boys will leave her, reader wishes to keep the pregnancy, based off a discussion on this post.
Now that you knew, you weren’t sure how you could honestly feel surprised. In fact, now you were kind of surprised that it hadn’t happened sooner. 
For all the claims that wizardingkind makes to be ahead of the curve in comparison to muggles, they don’t exactly have the best contraceptives. 
Potions are fine if you remember to take them, the same can be said about charms, and condoms are a foreign concept to the likes of wizarding society.
You’d been feeling so incredibly exhausted lately, and it had gotten to the point that you couldn’t make it through the day without having at least one nap. It was when you’d actually fallen asleep at the dinner table that Regulus started to fret, though Remus found it terribly funny at the time. 
Then came the aches and pains that never seemed to dull no matter what you did. You’d tried potions, over the counter muggle medications, hot baths, cold showers, lying flat, sitting up – nothing stopped the aches that seemed intent on plaguing you. Remus had even given you full body massages that, whilst absolutely heavenly, did absolutely fuck all. 
“Maybe you’re coming down with something?” He’d queried, holding the back of his hand to your head. “Reg? Can you bring me the thermometer?”
You swore you heard whatever Regulus had been fussing with in the kitchen fall unceremoniously onto the counter in his haste to come over to you.
“Why? Is she poorly?” He asked severely, placing the back of his hand against your head like Remus had, only far more aggressively and to the point that it actually made a slapping sound as it made contact.
“Och, babe! If she wasn’t poorly yet she’ll surely have a concussion now!” Remus chided, pushing Regulus’ hand away and cradling your head protectively to his chest.
Needless to say, the thermometer didn’t pick up a fever either. 
So, when you woke up the next morning and spent most of the day hunched over the toilet bowl, Reg insisted you see a Healer.
Once the Healer started to ask the more...pointed questions, the pieces all started to click together in your mind.
Are you sexually active? Yes.
When was your last menstrual cycle? They weren’t exactly regular so... you supposed it had been late.
Any nausea? Yes.
Fatigue. Uh-huh.
Body or muscle pain? Fuckin’ hells.
So now you were standing outside of yours, Remus', and Regulus’ shared flat with a copy of your test results in your hand wondering what in the buggering fuck you were going to do now.
Both Regulus and Remus were pretty set on not wanting children of their own. They loved children, and they were both really good with children (in their own, very different ways); but with Regulus’ past, his family's reputation, and “the sodding inbreeding, amour; I’d be surprised if it didn’t come out with everything upside down and backwards”, he was sure that it’d be better for everyone if he stayed childless.
And Remus.
Poor, sweet Remus.
Too ashamed of his own affliction to a) pass it onto his own biological child or b) force any child to live with the knowledge that they had a ‘monster’ for a father.
And that was that.
Children just wasn’t in the cards for you three.
Yet here you were...
Suddenly, you weren’t just worried; you were terrified.
They didn’t want this, they never wanted this. They had always been clear about that. They could have been more careful to prevent this, but here you were.
Here you were.
There you stood; outside of your shared flat, unable to bring yourself to open the door.
They were going to leave you; they’d leave you, surely. Yeah?
They didn’t want this.
They wouldn’t want you. 
Fuck.
“For the love of Circe, I’m jus- Salazar’s saggy balls, Y/N!” Regulus said as he stumbled in the doorway, startled after having been in the middle of shouting something over his shoulder only to nearly collide with you. “How long have you been standing out here?”
You stared dumbly at him; you weren’t ready to go inside. You weren’t ready to have this conversation.
Too bad.
“Not long?” You stated in the form of a question. He furrowed his brows and looked you up and down before offering you his hand up the two steps to your doorway. 
“I was just opening the doors and windows; you’re lovely boyfriend tried to make us dinner.” He explained with a fond eyeroll, stepping into the flat and squinting through the smoke flooding the living space.
“Yeah, yeah. Last time I try something new in the kitchen.” Remus muttered as he threw away an entire baking dish.
“What was it supposed to be again, sweetheart?” Regulus asked with a mischievous smirk you knew he picked up from spending too much time with Remus, Sirius, and James.
“Just never you mind, you tosser. Hi dove.” He muttered to Regulus, though his tone changed dramatically once he turned to you, his eyes softening as he took in your form.
“How was your appointment?”
Your appointment? Your appointment. The appointment you just had. The appointment where you found out. The appointment where you were told you were pregnant. That appointment. The appointment you were still holding the slip for. The slip with your results. The slip with your pregnancy test results. The slip with your positive pregnancy test results.
That appointment.
“I-”
And you took off to the bathroom, slammed the door behind you and heaved into the toilet. 
There was a gentle knock on the door as you sat back against the tub with your knees to your chest, trying to catch your breath. “Dove?”
Another knock.
“Okay, we’re coming in.” Came Regulus’ more authoritarian voice through the door before it slowly opened to allow both of them entrance.
Remus had to fold himself a number of times in order to sit on the bathroom floor beside you whilst Reg flushed the toilet (while you flushed in embarrassment) and closed the lid to sit on it, facing you and Remus. 
“Did you get any answers from the healer?” Regulus asked quietly.
You smothered a humourless scoff and nodded your head in the affirmative. 
The boys let you sit there with your head laid back onto the edge of the tub and your eyes closed before Regulus couldn’t seem to handle it anymore.
“And? Are you... okay?”
You took in a deep breath and pulled that paper - now crumpled within your fist - cast a gemino duplication spell on it and handed one to each boy. 
You curled yourself inward and rested your forehead on your knees, reminding yourself to breathe even though you knew these two men now knew that you were expecting, that you were expecting their child. 
It could have been moments, or it could have been hours; but it was Remus who broke the silence.
“Pregnant?” He whispered on an exhale.
You cautiously raised your head to look over at him by your side, noticing that his eyes were shining with unshed tears.
You brought him to tears.
He never wanted this.
He wouldn’t want you.
“You’re really pregnant?” He asked again.
You nodded and swallowed around your gag reflex; unsure whether the nausea was nerves or...pregnancy related.
“You’re...” Reg started, still looking down at the paper in his hands. “You’re... gonna have a baby?” He whispered in awe.
You felt your brows furrow when you heard an emotional chuckle from beside you.
You turned back to see Remus wiping tears away from his eyes as he looked back down at his own paper in front of him.
“We’re gonna have a baby?” Remus corrected, nudging Regulus’ calf with his foot.
“Wait, you... you guys aren’t upset?” You asked urgently. Both boys snapped to attention to look at you in various degrees of worry or horror.
“Upset!?” Remus gawked as Regulus started shaking his head emphatically.
“Why? Why would you be worried of such a thing?”
You shook your own head and looked down at your hands as you began picking at your nailbeds. “Neither of you were ever interested in having kids of your own.” 
“Oh, dovey.” Remus cooed and quickly pulled you into his side. “When was the last time we talked about this, huh? When we first graduated Hogwarts? I think we could manage a kid now, yeah?”
“Or four.” Regulus added, causing you and Remus to straighten up significantly.
“Four!?” You and Remus chorused.
“Since when did you want kids?” You questioned incredulously.
“The moment I saw you hold Harry for the first time.” He answered without hesitation. 
“Ha ha.” Remus taunted. “Mine was watching her shop for Lily’s baby shower.” 
“What!?” You nearly screeched.
Regulus sighed before ultimately moving to sit on the floor on your other side; you knew this was very serious considering he was a notorious germ freak. 
“I was always a little afraid of having kids of my own, you’re right. I mean, you’ve seen the way that Sirius and I turned out, yeah?”
You and Remus scoffed at that.
“I just hated the idea of ever being anything like my parents, because that’s all I know. Or I guess, that was all I knew. But... I think you guys have taught me an awful lot.”
You watched Regulus’ stormy grey eyes as they moved between you and Remus. “You’ve both taught me to slow down, to be more patient, to see the fun in the mess and the burnt food and the change of plans. You’ve taught me that I won’t perish if I sit on the bathroom floor for a minute. And, I think most importantly, you’ve taught me how to love. And when I see how happy Harry is, I realize that’s all a kid really needs, yeah? Love?”
“You... you really want a child? This child?” You asked in a whisper.
Regulus’s face turned heartbroken for a moment. “You’re child? Absolutely, amour. There was never any doubt.”
“I always thought I’d pass on only the worst parts of me to any child.” Remus added, turning your attention to him. “But I find I’m only ever my best self when I’m around the two of you. And any child that’s even a fraction of either of you, well, I’d be one... one lucky man to call them mine.” He whimpered the end of his sentence before breaking out into a sob.
“Oh, Rem.” You murmured empathetically, pulling his larger frame into your side. He chuckled through happy tears as he moved one of his hands tentatively to your abdomen.
“A baby...” Regulus breathed, looking back at the paper in his hands. “We’re really going to have a baby?”
You and Remus exchanged a shy glance, understanding seeming to pass between the two of you before you both turned back to Regulus.
“We’re going to have a baby.” You concurred. 
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nurse-floyd · 7 months ago
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The Deli-Cats
For @vivwritesfics who inspired both reader bringing home every stray cat they find and baby ballsack <3 (this will make sense when you read the fic!)
Y/N finds a very pregnant sphinx cat on her way home and Max is more than happy to introduce her to their family.
Warnings: None. Unless you hate cats, then what is wrong with you?
If you liked this fic or moodboard please consider requesting or buying me a coffee?
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You hadn’t meant to bring home another cat while Max was away. In fact, the thought never even crossed your mind until you heard a loud cry coming from behind a dumpster in an alleyway you crossed on the way home. You followed the noise, honestly thinking it was a baby at first. I mean…you were half right; it was a baby in your mind. There, huddling behind the trash cans when it heard you coming, was a beautiful, although very dirty, sphinx cat.
“Oh sweetheart…” you cooed softly as you bent down to seem less threatening. You held out your hand, showing the cat you meant no harm and let it sniff you before it started nuzzling against your hand, buzzing softly.
It was only when it came out of the shadows that you saw its belly. Her very round and very pregnant belly.
She continued to sniff around your crouched form for a little longer. When she climbed into your lap and snuggled into your soft hoodie, you knew the cat distribution system had chosen you. “Well…how are we going to explain this one to Max?” you sighed, already knowing this cat was definitely coming home with you.
With the cat safely in your arms, you stood up and made your way through the streets of Monaco back to your apartment. People shot you a few strange looks, but there are weirder things to see than a very round and naked cat being carried through the streets, right?
You knocked on the door, realizing you couldn’t get your keys from your pocket with your hands full. You sucked in a breath as the door opened, and Max’s face immediately went to the bundle in your arms.
“Surprise?”
Max led you in with a hand on the small of your back and closed the door behind you. You didn’t even need to explain any further as he reached forward and took the cat from your arms.
The cat nuzzled against his beard, and you could tell he was already as in love as you were. You took her to the bathroom and set her up with some blankets, food, and water to keep her away from a very curious Jimmy and Sassy. She immediately ate and then snuggled into the plush blanket you’d laid out for her.
“She looks like a rotisserie chicken.”
You burst out laughing at the comment that seemingly came out of nowhere and couldn’t help but agree; she kind of did with her round pot belly.
“Well. Welcome to the family, Chicken.”
After taking her to the vet the next morning for a thorough check-up, your suspicions (not that you thought anything different with her very round belly) were confirmed: you were going to be cat grandparents.
Later that night, after her clean bill of health, you decided to introduce her to Jimmy and Sassy. The pair had already been stalking her outside of the bathroom door and were very curious to meet the invader of their household.
Sassy was first; she looked at her and back to you and Max, and then walked away seemingly without a care in the world. Jimmy, however, was smitten. He cautiously walked up to her, and after a sniff, they were rubbing their heads on each other. From then on, your little family seemed to get along quite well, and you and Max couldn’t be happier.
You set up the Instagram account that evening and introduced the world to Chicken. Like the majority of the pets of the grid, she became very popular and everyone was excited for the arrival of the new additions. Danny teased Max about being a grandad, Alex had already claimed one of the kittens to add to the Albon zoo, and countless others were in love with her.
That happiness soon turned into anxiety as Max had to leave for another race week. It would have been okay if it was any other weekend, but this happened to be the very weekend your very round cat, who had gotten even rounder, was due to give birth to her kittens.
“Do you have to go?” you asked. It was a stupid question, yes. He did have to go, and you knew you could handle it yourself, but you just wanted backup in case.
He kissed you on the cheek and kissed Chicken, who by this point was so round she just about had the energy to waddle from her bed to the litter tray or her food bowl.
“I’ll be home before you know it. You’ll be fine; besides, she still has a little while to go.”
With a final kiss, you sent him off on his way. “Well guys, it’s just the four of us now,” you spoke to the three sets of eyes that were locked onto you.
Chicken slowly blinked at you, and Sassy couldn’t care less as she continued about her business grooming herself from atop her cat tower. At least Jimmy gave you some ounce of comfort as he nuzzled against your hand.
A few days later, after you’d watched qualifying with your three children (they were most definitely your children), Chicken began to get more grumpy and a lot more agitated.
“Shit.”
You set up the bathroom with lots of towels, newspaper, and fresh water and placed her in there. Then you phoned Max as your panic began to rise, but it kept going to voicemail. You didn’t even check the time difference or his schedule to see what he’d be doing; you didn’t care; you just needed him.
Relief flooded your veins as he finally answered and his face came on your screen.
“Hey…” His big smile faded as he saw the panicked look on your face and the tears starting to spill over.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s Chicken…it’s time. The babies!”
To anyone else, the conversation would have sounded quite comical.
“Okay, breathe schatje. She’s got this,” he reassured. “She knows what to do, she’s got this.”
Max was able to calm you down enough for you to see sense. He sat with you for as long as he could until he had to go to bed and reassured you that she’d be okay.
Then you were alone.
It was a long night for the pair of you, but eventually, come morning, you had six very healthy kittens and one very happy but tired momma.
You called Max once more; he was already in his fireproofs, having just finished the last of his media duties before the race. “How is she?” He was practically buzzing with excitement.
His face lit up as you turned the camera and he saw six gorgeous wrinkly babies suckling from their mom. Chicken, as if she knew Max was on the phone, lifted her head up and slowly blinked.
“You did so good, momma!” Max cooed, his voice so soft and in awe.
He couldn’t stay much longer, but you wished him luck, and with the promise of seeing him later that night, you let him go.
Later that evening, when Max finally arrived home, you couldn’t wait to show him the new babies. You lifted the makeshift curtain you’d set up to give Chicken some privacy. She lifted up her head but placed it back down when she realized it was just you and Max.
“Chicken! Look at your babies,” Max said as he eyed the six babies that were suckling from her.
“She was a trooper!” you said, leaning into Max’s side, happy to both sit and watch the babies.
It was quiet until Max spoke. “They look like ballsacks,” he blurted out, not quite thinking about what he was saying until it came out. He looked at you with that cheeky grin that you loved.
You smacked him, “Don’t say that about our grandchildren!”
“Have you thought about names?”
“We are not naming one Ballsack, Max…” you deadpanned, knowing exactly what he was getting at.
Later that evening, you posted about your new additions and introduced the world to the deli-cats, the name you'd decided on wanting to keep on brand with rotisserie chicken. Bologna, Turkey Slice, Pastrami, Prosciutto, Salami, and much to your dismay, Ballsack (only because Max insisted and you couldn’t think of any more meat). Alex claimed prosciutto before you could even put your phone down, the text message on your phone coming through. Max was in love with Ballsack, being the runt of the litter and the cutest of the bunch, but he wasn’t biased, definitely not. The name would definitely be changing, though.
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hvnyrt · 2 months ago
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Voice in the Wind - ALTERNATE ENDING
JASON TODD X READER
I have never really written angst before, and I was really happy with the way my last work came out, but I couldn't help but want the reader and Jason to end up together in the end ;’) So I wrote a quick alternate ending to the same work, a happy ending this time, enjoy!
SUMMARY: Jason has been struggling with the idea of a relationship, fighting inner battles with himself constantly, you convince him to open up.
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The rooftop of a Gotham skyscraper was cold beneath Jason Todd’s boots. His breath formed small clouds in the air, the city’s ever-present hum a background noise to his thoughts. He stood facing the edge, arms crossed, eyes scanning the streets below. It was late — or early, depending on how you looked at it — and the city was bathed in a sickly orange glow from the streetlights. Gotham was always awake, like a predator that never rested, and Jason… Jason was just another hunter in its maze of shadows.
He was trying to focus. ‘Focus, Todd,’ he told himself. ‘Don’t be weak. Stay sharp.’ But there was a problem. Your face kept slipping into his mind. No matter how hard he tried to shove it away, there you were again, with that crooked smile and those damn eyes that could cut straight through his walls.
Your voice rang in his ears. He hated your voice because it followed him everywhere, like an earworm he couldn’t get rid of. And your name. He hated your name because it made him feel like he could say it, like he could speak it aloud and claim it, and he didn’t want to claim anything. Not You. 
"She’s just a distraction," he muttered under his breath, the words lost in the wind. "Just a damn distraction." 
Except you werent. He knew it. 
He didn’t know how you had got under his skin, but you had. It had started innocently enough: a few random meetings while he was on patrol, a conversation here and there. But then something shifted. Something he couldn’t control, couldn’t shake. It wasn’t that he wanted to care about you; he didn’t. He couldn’t. Not when he knew better, when he was haunted by the ghosts of his past mistakes. People like him didn’t get to have things like that. People like him didn’t get to have… normal.
It was so fucking frustrating. 
"Stupid." Jason spat the word out as if it could wash away the thoughts, the feelings he didn’t want to deal with. There was no place for feelings in the world he lived in. It was all blood and violence, adrenaline and fear, and you… you were none of that. You were calm. Grounded. Real. You made him feel like he wasn’t constantly running from something.
Nope. Not happening.
"Jason?"
The voice broke through his internal tirade, familiar and warm, cutting through the cold like a blade. Jason didn’t turn around. Didn’t even flinch. But his heart did a strange little lurch. He hated that it did, but it did.
There you were, standing a few feet away, your arms wrapped around yourself to shield against the Gotham night. You didn’t even seem to notice how out of place you were up here — on this rooftop, so far above the city you loved but could never truly understand. You weren't like him. Never would be.
"You shouldn’t be here," he said, his tone as dismissive as he could manage. "Go home, It’s dangerous up here."
Your eyes flickered with that same mixture of concern and defiance he was growing all too familiar with. "And I’m guessing you’re worried about me?" you said, your voice laced with quiet amusement.
Jason’s lip curled slightly, though it wasn’t a smile. More like a reflex. “I worry about everyone, you're no different.” He said flatly, his back still turned.
But even as he said it, the doubt crept in. You had a way of doing that — making him second-guess every cynical, hardened part of himself that wanted to pretend he didn’t care. But he didn’t let it show. He never did.
"I’m not helpless." you said softly, stepping a little closer, close enough that he could feel the heat radiating off you. "You don’t need to protect me. You don't have to worry me. Just please, tell me what's on your mind. Talk to me. Let me in." You wanted him so bad to just admit that he wanted you as much as you wanted him. You tried too hard to get him to open up to you, to get him to see what your relationship could be. He never listened.
The words hit him harder than they should have. He wanted to argue, to push you away again. You didn’t understand. You didn’t get what the world was really like, what it could do to someone like him. Someone who had already been destroyed once, who didn’t want to give it a second chance.
Instead, he just shrugged, trying to appear indifferent. "I’m not your protector. Just someone who knows better."
You raised an eyebrow, that familiar smirk tugging at the corners of her mouth. "So you’re telling me I shouldn’t be out here, too, but you’re not protecting me?" 
Jason didn’t answer. His gaze drifted away from her, back to the city lights, to the shadows below. But he didn’t walk away. He never did.
"You really think I can’t handle myself?" Your voice was quieter now, and for a moment, it almost sounded like you were teasing. Almost. 
Jason let out a breath, unable to keep the edge out of his voice. "You think you’re the only one who can handle themselves?" He turned his head just enough to catch her gaze. "This place doesn’t make you stronger. It makes you smarter. And if you’re not smart enough to get the hell out of it, you’ll get crushed. And that’s not something I’m willing to let happen."
The words left his mouth sharper than he’d intended, but he couldn’t stop them now. He never could when it came to you. 
You didn’t say anything at first. Just looked at him with those damn eyes that felt like they saw straight through his bullshit. Then, slowly, you took a step closer, not intimidated, but calm.
"Jason, you don’t have to pretend with me. I’m not going anywhere."
The words hit him like a punch to the gut, though he’d never admit it. "I’m not pretending," he muttered, too quickly, and too defensively. 
The city stretched out beneath them, vast and indifferent, like a black sea dotted with the flickering lights of a thousand lives he would never touch. Jason stood there, his shoulders tense, his fists clenched. You were still beside him, too close for comfort, your presence a constant reminder of everything he couldn’t afford to feel. 
Focus, he told himself. Don’t let her in. Don’t let her do this to you.
But it was already too late.
You were right. He was pretending. 
Jason’s jaw tightened at the thought, and he could feel the familiar coldness creeping in — the walls he had built so carefully around himself, the ones that were starting to crack and crumble under your quiet, persistent gaze. The feeling of wanting to reach for you, of wanting to say the things that scared him more than anything else in this broken city, gnawed at him like a sickness. 
But no. He couldn’t do it. Not to you. Not again.
"You don’t get it," Jason said, his voice rougher than he meant it to be. He didn’t look at you, but he could feel you staring at him, that soft gaze that always seemed to see straight through him. "This isn’t… this isn’t some fairy tale. You can’t just waltz in here and fix me. I’m not… I’m not someone you can save. You don’t know what it’s like, and you never will."
He finally turned to face you, his eyes burning with something he couldn’t even name. "I’m dangerous. And you think you can handle me? You think you can be around me and still come out unscathed? You have no idea what this world does to people like us."
You didn’t back down. Of course you didn’t. You never did. Instead, you stepped closer, her voice low but steady. "I know enough, Jason. I know you’re scared. You don’t have to push me away—"
"Stop," Jason cut you off, his voice sharp, almost desperate. He took a step back, as if your proximity was suffocating him. "Stop pretending like you know me. Like you understand anything about me."
Your brows furrowed in confusion. "Jason, I—"
"I’m not the guy you think I am!" He didn’t shout, but his voice trembled with the raw emotion he refused to show. "I’m not the guy you can fix. You think I don’t care about you? That I don’t—" He stopped himself, the words lodged in his throat like broken glass. He could already feel the heat in his chest, the thumping of his heart, the same damn pain that had been there since he came back from the dead. 
His fists clenched tighter. "I’m not your fucking hero. I’m a killer. A broken, fucked-up, damaged thing, and you don’t want to get close to that."
The words came out in a rush, desperate, but also… final. His eyes were wild now, the storm inside him too strong to ignore, the war he’d been fighting with himself spilling out in a way he hadn’t intended. 
You stood there, silent for a moment, your face unreadable. Then your expression softened, a mixture of hurt and understanding flickering behind your eyes.
"I’m not trying to fix you," you said quietly, your voice steady despite the tension crackling in the air between them. "I’m just trying to be here. I’m trying to be someone you don’t have to push away."
Jason didn’t respond right away. He couldn’t. The words felt too raw, too close to something real. And that scared him more than anything. 
"You don’t understand," he whispered, his voice barely audible. "You can’t understand. I can’t let you in. Not like this. Not after everything."
He took another step back, further into the shadows, his heart pounding in his chest. Every instinct in him screamed to get away from you, to run, to push you out of his life before you were swallowed up by the darkness he carried with him.
"Jason," your voice was quiet now, soft, like you were trying to reach him through the thick walls he had built. "Please."
But he couldn’t do it. Not for you.
Jason shook his head, more to himself than to you. He turned his back on you, the weight of his decision heavy in the pit of his stomach. His feet moved automatically, the thought of staying with you—of letting you see him, really see him—was too much to bear. 
Before he could even reach the edge of the rooftop, he heard your voice again, fragile but clear.
"You don’t have to do this alone."
He froze. For a second, everything inside him wanted to turn around, to reach for you, to tell you how much he wanted to believe that. How much he wanted to let you in. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t let anyone in.
Jason's gaze lingered on the skyline, the weight of the city pressing down on him. His fists were still clenched, his jaw set tight, but inside, a storm was brewing, one that was just as chaotic as the one in the streets below. His heart was a mess of confusion and fear, and even though he wanted to push you away — needed to push you away — something about your quiet presence beside him made it feel impossible.
When you spoke again, your voice was gentle, almost like a whisper, yet it cut through the thick air between you with the clarity of truth. "You don't have to do this alone, Jason."
His eyes flickered to yours, and for a moment, he could barely breathe. He’d heard those words before, but never with the kind of sincerity that made him feel like he wasn’t alone in the universe. That maybe, just maybe, there was someone who saw through his walls, someone who wasn’t afraid of the darkness he carried.
He shook his head, his voice rough, trying to hold onto the hardness that kept him safe. "I told you, you don’t get it. You don’t know what it’s like."
"I don’t need to," you replied softly. "I just need you to know that I’m not going anywhere. Not if you let me stay."
Jason’s heart pounded in his chest, the words stirring something deep inside of him, something that scared him more than anything. He wanted to say something — push you away, explain why this couldn’t happen, why he couldn’t let you in.
But the words stuck in his throat.
You took a step closer, not backing down, but not rushing him either. And for the first time, in the midst of all the noise inside his head, he realized that you weren’t asking him to fix himself. You were just asking him to be real. To stop pretending. To let you in.
Without thinking, without even fully knowing what he was doing, Jason reached out, his hand hovering just inches from yours. The proximity felt like a tug, a pull he couldn’t ignore. You didn’t flinch, didn’t pull away. Instead, you stood there, looking at him with those eyes that had always been so damn patient, so damn sure.
And in that moment, something inside Jason broke open — a crack in the walls that had kept him safe for so long. He didn’t need to pretend anymore.
He moved before he could stop himself.
One step, then two, and suddenly, he was close enough to feel your breath against his skin, close enough that he could see the way your lips parted slightly, as though you were holding your own breath, waiting for him to make the next move.
And then, like the world had shrunk down to just the two of you, Jason closed the gap.
His lips brushed against yours in a slow, tentative kiss, like he was afraid you’d disappear if he pressed any harder. But you didn’t pull away. Instead, your hand reached up, cupping the side of his face, and you kissed him back, steady and sure.
Jason’s heart skipped a beat, his mind racing, but in that moment, it didn’t matter. The tension that had held him captive for so long unraveled, piece by piece, until all that was left was this — you, here with him, unafraid.
He kissed you deeper this time, a soft but desperate need in the way his mouth met yours. The world felt a little less heavy, like maybe, just maybe, he didn’t have to carry the weight of it all on his own anymore.
When the kiss finally broke, Jason’s forehead rested against yours, both of you breathing in the same air, your hearts syncing in a way that made everything else fade into the background. He didn’t say anything at first. He couldn’t. But the words he didn’t have to speak were already there — in the way his hands found your waist, in the way his body relaxed against yours.
“I’m scared,” he whispered, his voice rough with the admission. "Scared I’m not… enough. That I’m too broken for anyone to be here. To be what you need."
You leaned into him, your arms wrapping around him, grounding him with the warmth of your touch. “You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be you. And that’s enough for me, Jason. That’s more than enough.”
His chest tightened at your words, the sincerity of them striking deep. He wasn’t used to hearing that — wasn’t used to anyone seeing him for who he really was, not the mask he wore to survive, not the monster he sometimes thought he was.
But you did.
He let out a breath, the weight of everything in him finally beginning to lift. “I don’t know how to do this,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.
You smiled softly, brushing a strand of hair from his face. “We’ll figure it out. Together.”
Jason closed his eyes, his heart a little lighter than before. Maybe he didn’t have to have all the answers. Maybe he didn’t have to be the hero, or the villain, or the broken man he always saw in the mirror.
Maybe he just needed to be someone who didn’t have to face the world alone.
As you stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, Jason realized that he wasn’t as lost as he thought. Not anymore.
For the first time in a long time, he was ready to face whatever came next.
And he was ready to face it with you.
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gay-dorito-dust · 4 months ago
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Okay hear me out ....
after getting kicked out they erase all the memories of the pines after the pines family finds the truth. They find reader and giving her a heart felt apologize for all the stuff they said and did but reader is just confused even when Mabel, tries and shows them the bracelet they still have no clue and just hug Mabel because they feel bad for her. I can image how sad they'll be realizing it pained them so much they erased there mind of them.. also I live your storys there so heart breaking I love it. ❤️
This can take place after Weirdmagedon and they might’ve pulled a mcgucket and erased their memory of it all a second time cuz it was too much.
It hurts even more when Ford doesn’t have anything to show reader in hopes of jogging their memory and neither does Stan, only Mable has the bracelet and it’s not enough.
You’re is stuck with no memories of ever being Ford’s assistant, going anomaly hunting, being possessed by bill nor the past thirty years rebuilding a portal.
‘Please remember.’ She pleads tearfully as her worst fears come true after pulling away from the hug you’ve given her.
You could only stare at the child that once upon a time you would’ve happily risked your life for in confusion. ‘What is there to remember? I’m sorry kid but I don’t know any of you.’
Mabel cried and dipper goes to comfort her while Ford and Stanley only feel just as hopeless as neither of them had anything to jog your memory of them, and now their apology fell on deaf ears because you didn’t know them nor know what they did to you.
You only looked at Mabel with sympathy but stood up regardless and left the weird family that claimed to know you alone to mourn whoever it was they were mourning for, you knew damn well it wasn’t you. However as you were walking you noticed a weird statue of a cartoonish triangle with one eye, bow tie and a top hat with his had out stretched as though making a deal.
You didn’t know why but the statue struck you as familiar but not in the good way, the familiar feeling this statue gave you was pain, betrayal and anger along with the vow to never let certain people back into your life, but what people? Who hurt you? Who betrayed you? Was it that family you left behind? If so why would you ever want them back in your life just so they could mistreat you again?
You shrugged your shoulders and kept it pushing, not noticing that Bill’s eyes glowed a sickening green as it followed you, knowing that even if he didn’t win neither did the Pines Family and that was all he cared about as he cackled in his cell farm far away.
Poor Mabel, not even the stupid bracelet she made could jog your memory and due to the lack of memories made with you by any of them outside of her, you are doomed to wander Gravity Falls memory less of the life you once lived, nor the fact that you wandered the town you single-handedly saved at the cost of your own memories; everyone knew you and you knew them but the Pines Family? They’re just some strangers who claim to know you.
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ilovetoxicfictionalmen · 3 months ago
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WARMTH
A KINKTOBER SPECIAL - REGENCY AU WITH TOMMY SHELBY
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Pairing.| Tommy Shelby x fem!reader
Summary.| The Queen is not spared by the King’s cruel nature. However she does get to feel his warmth.
Warnings.| Noncon, dubcon, rough sex, p in v, groping, hitting, manipulating, exhibition, somnophilia at the end
Word count.| 2k
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King Thomas Shelby.
To the Kingdom, your husband was their savior. He brought his people out of starvation. Graced the skies of Birmingham with produce, conquest and wealth. The Kingdom that was once doomed to be a dark city of brimstone and ash, has been reborn into a vigorous land.
But to you, he was frightening. He was the weather, his conditions were constantly changing, you could never precisely predict what would occur with him. One moment, he was a brute. Completely ruthless to everyone around him, his humanity drained empty. Those loyal to him - including yourself, his Queen- were not spared by his wrath. But then, the next, he was kind, thoughtful, gentle, and genuine. His persona constantly shifted. You quickly learnt that you would have to wear multiple hats with him, in order to attempt to stay on his good side.
You had been married to the King for only a month. His army had effortlessly conquered your small kingdom. It was your father’s fault, as Thomas claimed. Your father had refused to create an unfair alliance with the Kingdom of Birmingham. So King Thomas declared war.
When your father kneeled before King Thomas, Thomas demanded all of his daughters to come forward. For his personal award of conquest, he wanted to take your sisters and yourself away. However, when his devilish blue eyes laid on you, he had a change of heart.
The ceremony commenced the day your carriage arrived at the Kingdom of Birmingham. The three day journey was not enough time for preparation of your new life. Your family were not invited, eternally banished from Birmingham, forcefully abandoning you from your loved ones.
On your wedding night, you learnt that the King was a slithering snake. He fed lies down your throat to satisfy his own needs and insecurities. He deflowered you without care, but then afterwards he worshiped your body. He kissed every inch on your skin as if you were dipped in gold.
On this cold, late evening, you sat on the edge of your bed. Still sniffing the tears away caused by the events from earlier on. You rubbed your hands anxiously as you felt like your feet were cemented down. The bath did not clean your dirty skin, the steam failed to clear your clouded mind.
“My love” Thomas whispered, leaning against the doorframe as he looked down upon you.
Sharply, you raised your curled chest and rolled your shoulders back. As you tried to sniffle your nostrils clear, you petted your damp cheeks with your sleeve. The King often knew how you sneak up on you at the worst possible times. He was a master at lingering in the shadows. For you believed he was born in the darkness hole of this world.
“I wish for you to sleep in my chambers tonight, the bed feels awfully cold this evening” Thomas ordered blankly with a nod, his arms crossed over his broad chest, the top few buttons undone.
It was common for Thomas to command you to warm his bed, his whores didn’t have the same warmth or comfort which you provided. But usually he had a guard or maid summon you, this was a first.
“Yes my King” you nodded your head quickly and hurried over to him, anxious that if you were any slower he’d shout at you.
The short walk down the hall was accompanied with silence. You trailed behind him like a squire as he strided to his chambers. When you entered his chambers and the heavy wooden door slammed shut, you undressed yourself completely. Awkwardly, you stood by the door with your head down, waiting for his wishes.
Thomas looked back to you as he approached his goblet, full of rich red wine. Even though he still reeked of sex, Thomas’ hungry eyes made his mouth water, mind eager of eating you all up. With each day passing, his whore’s feared that he’d soon forget about them. For the King never complimented them anymore, or seemed rather interested in their company.
“Go on, warm my bed” Tommy ordered, gesturing his hand towards the bed before he took a large swig of wine.
Quickly, your body disappeared under the heavy layers, your body propped on your side as you watched him. Thomas took his time finishing the goblet, his eyes analyzing your face. Admiring the purple bruise on your left eye that seemed to grow darker by the minute.
The goblet clanked down and Thomas slowly undressed himself, his blue eyes not leaving you once. After he blew out the last source of light except the fireplace, he crawled underneath the sheets like a predator teasing its prey. As he slithered up closely to you, the smell of wine lingered up your nostrils. His hand touched your bruised eye and you whimpered, flinching at the contact. Thomas kissed you gently, but sighed when you didn’t reciprocate the kiss.
“You’re upset with me” Thomas stated quietly, but his tone lacked proper care.
“No my King” you lied awfully.
“Do not lie to your King” Thomas hissed lightly, pressing his front to yours as his hand felt your curves underneath the sheets. You took a heavy breath in.
“My emotions mean nothing, my only concern is your health” you answered timidly, looking down as you felt his hands play with the skin of your stomach.
“They do not mean nothing to me…” Thomas sighed, rubbing the side of your heads together. “You’re hurt by what I did to you today, correct?” Thomas inquired through a whisper.
You swallowed down your fear. “Yes, my King” you admitted, whimpering slightly.
“You shall call me Thomas tonight” Thomas demanded softly.
“Yes, Thomas” you corrected yourself.
“My little mouse…” Thomas chaffed, squeezing the skin on your hips.
Earlier today, Thomas’ brother, Arthur made a drunken acclaim to the King. One that demanded a public performance on the King’s behalf. A bet that Thomas would have no shame in reframing from. Arthur made an allegation that Thomas was unable to make you orgasm, that’s why you were still so cowering and shy. He was yet to unleash the creature inside of you.
With a snap of his fingers, you were commanded to bend over the wooden table. The very table that all of Thomas’ advisors sat upon. For an everlasting ten minutes, you kept your eyes squeezed shut as Thomas took you from behind. Every peep you took, an image of filthy drooling mouths flashed.
As you cried out in a painful ecstasy, all of the men cheered the King’s name. The shame weighed heavy on your shoulders as you slowly pushed your chest up. Then, when Thomas attempted to pull you in for a kiss, you made the mistake of shoving him away, your mind fueled with disgust, anger and humiliation. The bruised eye you have now was the reactive punishment of embarrassing the King.
Swiftly, he shoved you back over the table and flipped your dress up, you squirmed underneath him, but he twisted your arms around you back as he took you for a second time. That time however, he demanded that you begged mercy to finish. When you were crying, almost screaming for release, he finally allowed it. Afterwards, he yanked you up from the table and shoved you towards the door, commanding a guard to escort you back to your chambers.
“I am sorry, my love. It was not my wish to humiliate or shame you” Thomas apologized quietly, his fingers brushed over your bruised eye. “I did what I had to do. I could not back down from a false claim, I am the King!” Thomas’ voice raised, you flinched in response. He sighed at your reaction. “You must be grateful, my love! Men with lower titles would treat their wives far more cruelly for such an act of disobedience, for a lesser act even! I only had to show my strength in front of my advisors. But you my Queen, I try to rekindle our companionship on behalf of both of our mistakes” Thomas exhaled, rubbing his nose against yours.
“Thank you Thomas” you whispered.
“You know that I did not intend to hurt your timid emotions, yes?” Thomas murmured, one hand caressing your rear whilst the other squeezed your breasts.
“Of course Thomas” you sighed, burying your face into the crook of his neck. His stiff body relaxed at your action.
“It was harmless, no man would dare to touch you! I merely wanted to make them envious of the perfect Queen who is mine…” Thomas gloated, his erection poking against thigh.
But his words were not powered by care of you, but rather possession. His obsession with you was very similar to love at first sight, but with every passing day, his fixation grew like the roots of a thorn bush. It was true, no man would ever dare to touch what he wanted. The only reason he kept your dress on earlier was from jealousy. The thought of another man seeing your naked state attacked his ego. Your body was for his eyes only.
“You’re weak, just like your father” Thomas joked with a light chuckle. “But also modest, I can only predict to be from your mother” he continued on, hands worshiping your breasts, his slender fingers pinching your nipple.
His mouth lowered to your chest, his sinister tongue slithered over your hardened nipple. You moaned out lightly, goosebumps spiking over your skin. You whined when his fingers brushed over your swollen cunt.
“Did I hurt you down there?” Thomas asked, face raised, eyebrow cocked. You whimpered as you quickly nodded your head. “I apologize for that, my love… I must care for you better. Any day shall we be blessed with the signs of you bearing my heir” Thomas acknowledged, caressing your stomach again, his head resting on your tits.
How were you supposed to stay angered by him? After all, he was the King and you were blessed with being his wife, his Queen. King Thomas chose you, you must remind yourself of that in these moments. He could have easily casted a more foul destiny on you. This was the best possible outcome for yourself.
His lips brushed over yours. Shyly, you purse your lips together against his. Thomas hummed, suckling at your lower lip. Your arms extended out and wrapped around his firm back.
It was so difficult with him. One minute you were terrified to be within arm's distance of him, the next you craved to feel his graceful touch. The King could be such a gentle lover at times. You’d be a fool to avoid those opportunities for comfort and warmth.
“Who do you belong to?” Thomas whispered into your ear.
“You Thomas” you breathed.
“Who am I?” Thomas asked, his fingers rolled over your clit.
“My King” you moaned.
“Go on” he urged, pressing harder against your sensitive bean.
“My husband” you smiled. Thomas hummed, rubbing the sides of your faces again. “My love” you continued, your emotions and sensations pushing your mind into a blissful dazed cloud.
“Yes, I am he, your thoughtful master” Thomas stated proudly, lightly humping his erection against you. You murmured out, laying heavy on the bed. “You must be exhausted, yes?” Thomas assumed.
“Yes Thomas” you answered.
“Let’s lay then…” Thomas suggested.
Easily, he flipped your body around and pressed himself against you, his head rested in the crook of your neck. Thomas caressed your stomach, his lips pecking at the skin on your neck. Your eyes fluttered shut, his erection pressing against your ass.
“Let me keep us warm, eh?” Thomas smirked as he lined up his tip to your entrance. Your sweet painful moans were music to his ears, but gradually you adjusted to his size.
“Yes Thomas” you murmured out. Gently, he buried his erection into your soft walls, sighing out in relief as he kissed your cheek.
“Sleep my love, for tomorrow I am all yours…” Thomas promised through a whisper.
You hummed in response and quickly dozed off. Thomas smirked, gently pumping himself into you as he didn’t want to awaken his Queen.
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munariplans · 1 year ago
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a second chance | natasha r.
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synopsis: in which natasha is given a second chance; a chance encounter with clint's children that sparks her wish to start a family with you.
natasha romanoff x spidey! reader
word count: 4k words
a/n: welcome to my last fic of 2023! thank you all for spending this wonderful year with me, and i wish for a happy, safe year for all of you in 2024. of course, to end off the year, we go back to our favourite spidey!reader and natasha duo. in other words, this fic was the conversation and experience that led up to is there someone else? enjoy x
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natasha romanoff liked to claim that she wasn’t good with children; she didn’t like them, they didn’t like her, and she did not have the faintest idea of how to take care of one, not to even mention having them in her life. once, the team had rescued a stranded child from the rubble of an explosion, and when steve asked if anyone was willing to look after her until emergency services arrived, natasha ducked to your side when his eyes landed on her, reluctantly shaking her head as the child looked to her curiously. 
but as her wife, you were amazing with children. and in that instance, seeing the exasperated looks on the others’ faces, and the frantic one on natasha’s, you had bravely stepped up to take the child from steve, being careful not to stand too close to natasha in case she freaked out. 
she watched as you sat the child on your lap, taking off your mask and letting her see your face. she smiled when you did, wiping off the blood and soot from her face as comfortingly as you could. you held her hand as you rocked her gently, trying to help her forget about the broken arm you were supporting with your other hand. there were no words exchanged between you and the child, she hadn’t cried at all, and for some reason, she looked almost calmer with you. but natasha knew you were a comforting presence in anyone’s life, not just hers, so it was only natural that the child wasn’t freaking out from her injuries in front of you. it also helped that you had let her put on your mask then, you cooing as you reminded her just how brave she was. 
natasha didn’t have good memories of children from the red room; she had spent far too many years suppressing the harrowing scenes of girls younger than her getting tortured and trained to be widows. she never knew children who were happy, or had good childhoods that allowed them to be free – hell, even she didn’t have that when she was a child. 
but seeing you so relaxed, and natural, with the child, tugged at her heartstrings more than it should. you were everything she never was, and each time natasha thought there were reasons that you were too good for her, you somehow manage to convince her there were a million more of why she wasn’t worthy of being married to someone so wonderful. 
she allowed herself to slowly approach you. and while you picked up that she was hesitant, you let her gather her own courage, and as she stood in front of you and the child, you leaned in and whispered, “that’s aunty natasha. she was the one who found you, you know? alerted me and uncle bruce over there, to help pull you out. she’s so pretty, and incredible, isn’t she?”
natasha wasn’t sure the girl even understood what you were saying, but the small smile that the child offered, and her eyes looking up at natasha’s own, had the woman transfixed. she didn’t know what to do, but you patted the spot beside you, and gestured for her to sit.
“do you want to say hi?” you asked natasha, to which she nodded. 
“hi, i’m…natasha,” she said to the child, but she had returned to playing with your mask. it was almost as if the child hadn’t noticed her at all; not the people she had murdered in this mission to save her, not the souls she tortured to get information out of, not even all that she had done in the red room to get to where she was today. she had seen natasha as she was; a woman who had saved her from the rubble, and returned to her newfound obsession over the piece of cloth. she was a child, seeing natasha as a person, which somehow was hard for her to digest. 
you let the girl keep your mask as emergency services arrived a few minutes later, holding natasha by your side as they shut the doors to the ambulance, mouthing you’re so brave even as the paramedics began assessing her. natasha was transfixed at the child grinning back at not just you, but her too. her grin had been toothy, and real. 
“you’re incredible,” your wife would comment later on, to which you shrugged.
“the little girl was an angel,” you said, then, noticing her hesitation, you leaned in to kiss her forehead, “and you were amazing. she liked you, i just knew it.”
“you really think so?” natasha’s voice suddenly turned insecure, but hopeful.
you nodded against her skin. “i know so.”
– 
the next time natasha had an encounter with a child, it was on a whole other level that she was unprepared for, and hesitant of. but she didn’t really have a choice this time. 
laura had run into some complications with her pregnancy with nathaniel, and clint was lost, and exasperated, of what to do. he needed to be by his wife’s side, but his two young children needed him too. and because of the urgency of the situation, he didn’t have enough time to hire a babysitter on such short notice. 
you caught him mid-meltdown in the common room, but the rest of the team were preparing to go on missions and didn’t have proper spaces to care for the kids for a few days. natasha was beside you then; the both of you had returned from a date in the park, and you knew she was as concerned for him just as you were. 
but you weren’t about to suggest taking the kids in just right there; natasha lived with you too, and if she wasn’t comfortable with suddenly having cooper and lila intrude into her living space, especially with her reservations about children, you knew it wasn’t something you could do without running by her.
you fished out your phone, remarking to natasha, “i should call a few of my friends, see if they can take the two in for a few nights.”
but natasha hadn’t let go of your hand. she was still frowning at clint’s state, trying desperately to beg his wife that he would be there in a few hours, and struggling to think about how he was going to juggle the kids and her. he was at his wits’ end, and natasha hated seeing her friend like this. 
suddenly, you felt her grip onto your coat, whispering lowly, “...why don’t we take them in?”
you looked away from your phone for a minute, still reeling in what your wife just said. natasha had told you, when you were still friends even, of just her reservations around children, and how much she didn’t want them even if she had the chance, so you understood. you understood, and respected her wishes, and although she knew you loved kids, you never pushed her on the subject further. you were always supportive and respectful of why she didn’t want them and couldn’t be with them. 
you almost couldn’t believe your ears. “what?”
“we take them in, just for a few nights. cooper and lila.” she tried to say nonchalantly, but you knew it was taking all of her willpower to even utter it to you. 
“are you sure?”
“clint’s in so much distress. our next mission hasn’t been assigned, and we can’t possibly not help him…as his friends.”
“but nat, if you’re not comfortable around them, we don’t have to, you know? i know…you have your reservations.”
but she held your hand, firmly, this time. “i know. but we can’t not help clint when he needs us. unless…you don’t want to?”
you shook your head, “of course i want to. i was just…i was afraid you didn’t, so i didn’t offer.”
“well,” she gave a small smile, “there’s a first for everything.” 
clint hugged the both of you like a grizzly bear as words of appreciation tumbled out of his mouth when you told him of the offer. natasha thought he looked like he was going to cry. 
while cooper was considerably an older toddler, baby lila was only about a year old. natasha remembered their birthdays. she remembered laura had been pregnant when you and clint first rescued her, which explained a lot of his agitation and desperation to return home safely. 
you walked in the door first, holding lila as she slept in your arms, while cooper was holding the ends of natasha’s jacket when he followed her in. she had stiffened when he first held her hand, and she cringed when he noticed; putting his hand on her jacket instead. you reassured her it was fine, and that if he hadn’t made a big deal out of it, she shouldn’t overthink it either. 
it was almost dinner time when the four of you arrived in yours and natasha’s apartment. the two of you had spent the better part of the morning and afternoon baby-proofing the place before picking them up. natasha had never known so many parts of the house had been so hazardous to baby lila, as she carefully checked and rechecked the apartment’s hazards. you watched her lovingly throughout her doing so, and getting yelled at by her when she found you accidentally leaving a power socket unplugged.
“what should we have for dinner?” natasha asked, to which you pulled up a list of recipes laura usually made for them. natasha took one look at them, and turned her nose, “those sound gross.”
you laughed, but began gathering ingredients anyway. “well, it’s what those two would have wanted.”
“how about we just order a pizza instead?” natasha quipped, to cooper’s delight. he had overheard the conversation, and began chanting pizza, pizza, pizza immediately after. 
you shared a glance with natasha, before telling him, “oh, your mommy said we can’t have–”
“–pizza, pizza pizza!” natasha suddenly joined in, standing beside him as the both of them gave you pouts and puppy dog eyes, and you knew you were at a losing end for this one. 
you ordered the pizza, and whispered to natasha later, when cooper was out of earshot, “you are such an enabler.”
“i give the kids what they want.”
you had to remind cooper very carefully to not tell clint and laura of just what he had been eating at your place when they got back. he only half-listened, busy tucking into the pieces of pizza natasha had carefully cut into equal, smaller squares for him. 
natasha stood by the bathroom door as you gave cooper his bath later on, cursing internally to yourself as he continually splashed you with the soapy bathwater. she laughed along with him as you blew shampoo out of your mouth for the fourth time in the span of ten minutes. 
“cooper, i will summon a giant shark to bite your soapy fins if you splash me one more time!” you had threatened, but the boy, upon seeing natasha’s giant grin behind him, had only laughed and splashed you once again. 
you shot a glare to natasha, but she only shrugged and gave you an amused smirk. she was so thankful that she had peeped in to see just how you were doing, despite being hesitant of giving the kids baths at first. 
you had assured her that it was fine, and that you didn’t want to overstep her boundaries, but natasha was struck with a curiosity and eagerness to know just how it would go. you certainly didn’t complain. 
seeing just how much fun you had with cooper, she volunteered to help with lila’s bath later on, much to your relief. you carefully taught her how to bathe the baby then, ensuring her head never dipped too deep into the water, and natasha held the girl with the fragility and care that she had for the tesseract back then. you found it difficult to stay irritated at her for long, not when she was so earnest in trying to not be stiff, and as natural as possible, bathing little lila. 
you thought she got just the reward for her efforts as the baby laughed at her antics, awarding her with a wide smile and minimal reluctance in being dressed for bed later on. 
– 
the next morning, when natasha opened her eyes, the first thing she noticed was that the space next to her was empty. she let her hand roam over the cold sheets, and groaned when she realised that she had slept in. you were already busy with the kids downstairs. 
rubbing her eyes and making her way down, she finally spotted you in the kitchen with clint’s children. you had pulled up a chair for cooper to stand beside you, and lila was rested on your hips while you carried her. you were busy instructing the boy to carefully ladle pancake mixture onto the stove. 
“okay, careful, steady, now. don’t ladle too much, or the inside’s going to be uncooked,” you held his hand as he poured the mixture in, giggling at the consistency and sight of the pancakes. natasha knew clint would have never allowed his kids near the stove. 
cooper watched intently as you flipped the pancakes for him a few minutes later, pointing to his baby sister at the magnificent contraption that was a frying pan. lila had her mouth agape watching your antics. the baby looked absolutely enamoured by you. from above, natasha supposed she wasn’t so different. 
she wrapped her arms around you as she approached, and you greeted her good morning with a kiss. she would never tire of the feeling of your lips against hers.
the four of you sat down for breakfast later on, and in the belief of her abilities and newfound adoration for the child, natasha volunteered to sit beside lila to feed her. the girl was more than happy to slam her hands on the baby chair and squash and smash the pancakes with her grubby fingers. you and natasha exchanged laughs watching her so. 
“she’s really so cute, isn’t she?” you remarked. natasha nodded, feeding the girl some of her porridge. 
“they’re both so cute. angels.”
you watched her patiently wait for lila to open her mouth, instructing her to sip the porridge slowly, and you thought she looked almost like a natural. in the oversized shirt that was yours, her hair tied up in a bun, face free of makeup, natasha looked so beautiful feeding the child. naturally so, like the role was made just for her. 
you couldn’t help taking out your phone, and snapping a quick photo of her and lila then. you could almost kiss the screen with how lovely she looked. 
“go and have some me-time for a bit, i’ll take the kids for a grocery run,” you mentioned to natasha later that day, as the both of you cleaned up while the kids napped. 
she paused for a minute, and you continued, “i know how hard this can be for you. and i figured a nice change of scenery for the kids would be good. a fun trip to the supermarket.”
“are you sure? i can help with the kids too, you know? this should be teamwork.”
“i’m fine, i can handle it. you need to rest, i don’t want to overload you with so much of them. we should take these things slow. have a bath, go to the gym, whatever you want to do. i’ve got them.”
with soapy hands and the dishes thrown into the sink, natasha pulled you down for a kiss, murmuring, “i love you, i love you so much.”
you giggled as you embraced her back. 
however, at the supermarket, you quickly realised that you were a sucker for cooper’s puppy dog eyes; you could never say no to him when he flaunted them. you gave in, first to a pack of cookies, then a box of chocolates, by the time he had shown them to you again while clutching a tub of ice cream, you knew that he had you wrapped right around his finger. 
you scooped him up then, threatening to bite his cheeks. “i am going to get into so much trouble with your daddy. please, please, pick between the cookies or that, sweetheart.”
he pouted, but you shook your head desperately, “please, don’t pull that on me. you know you’ll win.”
you ended up spending more time than necessary convincing the boy to pick just two of his favourites, with a deal that lila got to pick her own snacks. you tried to tell him that she was too young to do so, but his sister had his back; and he ended up getting the ice cream anyway. 
and at the cashier line, you spotted the flowers section, and made a quick detour for them.
“i have a mission for you both. we’re going to pick the nicest, prettiest flowers for aunty nat, okay?”
it was lila’s turn to use her expertise, as you let her get her hands on any flowers she wanted for herself, and flowers that she could pick for natasha. there was a serious discussion between the kids, until they ultimately decided on getting pink roses for your wife. 
you had to once again beg cooper not to tell his parents of just what you allowed him to buy at the store, while lila happily helped to hold on to the flowers in her baby seat in the car. 
– 
“aunty natttt!” natasha was more than happy to oblige coming down the stairs, seeing your car pull into the parking lots from the window. 
freshly showered and energised from the gym, natasha suddenly felt her heart melt into a lovesick puddle as cooper rushed towards her, holding the bouquet of roses that covered nearly his whole face. “we picked this for you!”
“oh my,” she breathed, accepting it gratefully as she made eye contact with you. if there were a million universes, she wished she was married to you in all of them. 
you sheepishly came to her, putting lila down and letting her return to her toys. “hi, we’re home.”
the flowers were crushed in between your bodies as she pulled you in, kissing your lips until they were almost going to bruise. you chuckled, helping her find a vase for them after. “thought it was a nice gesture. they picked the pink roses.”
“you know that i love you so much, right?” she asked seriously, head on your shoulder as you carefully placed the flowers in the vase. she almost never wanted to let you go. “you’re so good to me.”
“just what you deserve.”
– 
natasha was almost heartbroken to have to say goodbye to the kids after the three nights they spent in your home; something she would never have said just a few months ago. they had changed her, and her perspective on what she saw were fragile, tortured souls, for so long. natasha never knew children could ever be so innocent and carefree. she never knew she could be so carefree and loving to them either, not until you showed her of just how happy they could make a home be. 
you had to go on a mission the following day, so the two of you spent the rest of the day in bed, relishing in each other’s presence before you would be separated for a little while. 
she rolled over in your arms when your phone rang, and the sight that greeted her made her stomach whirl. your wallpaper was the one of her and lila, the morning where you made breakfast for all of them. natasha could almost agree the ease and love she had for the child was unbridled and pure, evident in the photo of it then. 
“darling…” she drawled, hiding her face in your neck. it had been playing in the back of her mind, moving to the tip of her tongue then. the photo just confirmed everything she had always known. you had changed her, mind, body and soul. 
“yes, nat?” 
suddenly, it wasn’t so suffocating, or difficult to say, “let’s have kids too.”
there was a hitch in your breathing, hesitation for a minute, and natasha wondered if she had said the wrong thing, if she had overestimated your love for children, if it was a mistake confessing that at all. she even thought, for a moment, that it would cause a rift in your relationship, and whether it was stupid to have said anything at all.
but then, your arms wrapped around her even tighter, as you brought her to face you. “...are you saying…?”
“they’re not so bad, cooper and lila, and all those other ones we’ve been around,” she confessed, “and i look at you, and i can’t think of anyone else more fitting to be a parent. especially a parent by my side. i’m ready to have children with you, and i want to carry them. for the rest of my life too.”
she felt hot, happy tears against her skin, as you sniffled and tried to hide your tears of joy. she smiled at you, letting her thumb graze over your skin. “i love you, and i want to share the rest of my life with you. but i think our lives will be even better if we can share it with our children, too.”
you nodded. at that point, you would have done anything natasha could ever want. “i think so too. but natasha, i want you to be absolutely sure of this, because…”
“...and i am. i am absolutely sure.” but she looked away sadly suddenly, swallowing her own tears. “i just–it’s difficult to even speak of it when i’m…when i can’t have them for you. not after what the red room did.”
it was your turn to wipe her tears, rolling over so you were on top, reassuring her, “in the morning, i promise, i swear on my life, that i will find a solution. tony and i…we had a discussion once. about letting the widows have a second chance. about giving them the freedom of choice to have a family. we even asked bruce about the possibility of a reverse hysterectomy.”
“and you stopped? the idea from going further?”
“well, i didn’t want to freak you out. you told me you didn’t want kids, and i thought bringing up the subject would make you uncomfortable,” you confessed, “though, now i wished we had started earlier.”
natasha thought for a moment, before, “i’ll do it.”
“hmm?”
“i’ll be your test subject, i’ll do it, if you and tony ever do it. i want to be the one to carry, and give you kids, baby. this is a once in a lifetime opportunity for us. and if there’s anyone that is able to do it, it’s you, tony, and bruce. no others i would trust with my life, and my body, more.”
natasha saw just the love and adoration in your eyes, and for once, she finally believed that she was so deserving of that love. she finally saw just how important, and loved she was, looking into your eyes, and the warmth that surged through her system made her want to curl even further into you and be in your embrace forever. 
“i love you so much, natasha romanoff,” you muttered, “my wife, the mother of my children.”
she giggled into your skin, sitting up for a minute to feel your lips against hers. this time, the salty tears from both of your eyes only made the kisses even sweeter, even more lovely. she thanked clint and laura for giving her the opportunity to experience being a parent, tony and bruce for thinking of her so lovingly to want to give her a second chance at being a mother, and her lucky stars for you. 
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urperfectcinnamonroll07 · 6 months ago
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Baby, You're Like Lightning In A Bottle
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requested?: no pairing(s): Jake Sim x afab!reader genre: Fluff and a smidge of angst, smut, college au, non-idol au warning(s): mentions of an age gap (not hugely mentioned, jake is older than reader), angry love confession in the rain (i think that should be a warning for all those romance book readers out there), smut, praise kink, two damn idiots in love, reader thinks jake is in love with someone else, jake nd reader get into a fight, pussy drunk jake(ish), oral (f&m recieveing), acarophilia, size kink, breast play, facefucking(?), squirting, hair pulling (ish), jake holds readers hand through her first time (yes, this is a warning, shush), body worship(ish) summary: 𝘫𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴, 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 word count: 3.6k (HOLY SHIT) a/n: so sorry the fic was not out for a while guys! i got caught up in bridgerton and completely forgot to start writing lmao. (plus i just suck at love confessions) hope you all enjoy, remember to eat and drink something, love yas, mwah! (p.s WTF THIS IS PROBABLY THE BEST IVE EVER WRITTEN)
you and jake had always been best friends for a while, since you were born. he was a few years older than you, so he had always taken responsibility over you. Every heartbreak you went through, he was there, every date who stood you up, he was there. every fight you had with your parents, he was there. every single event that happened in your life, he was there.
even when you didn’t want him to be, even when you were angry at a stupid little boy for breaking your heart, he was there and you could not deny that you felt something towards the boy.
little did you know, jake reciprocated those feelings, because, everything he was there for, you were there for more. through everything. when his first girlfriend cheated on him, when he got stood up from dates. you were there through every heartbreak, every fight. you two were always there for eachother.
recently, you hadn’t been paying that much attention to your own love life and needs, mostly getting other people together and giving relationship advice even though the only ones you had ever been in were toxic. you were really good at paying attention to other people and how their body language changed around the people they liked, whether it be romantically or platonically. You were also really good at noticing how fast jake had fallen in love with a specific girl, lily.
you were heartbroken, naturally, but you did what had to be done. you had tried to set the two of them up over and over. lily had never shut up about how much she liked jake, no matter how many times you ignored her and made it obvious you could not give a single fuck about how much she loved jake.
you didn’t care because you loved jake. nobody knew him as well as you did. but, lily was your friend and so was jake, so you set them up. or at least tried to.
jake had just gotten back from a date with lily, and by the looks of things, it wasn’t a good one. the thing was, you hadn’t told jake a very crucial piece of information. you had gotten accepted into a university that would help you take on your dream job, but it was in london, and since you were both in college in new york, it would mean having to move ages away. jake was pissed when he came back, claiming the whole date was just shit because lily had only talked about herself the whole time and knew absolutely nothing about jake.
you had tried to calm him down and convince him to go on another date, but he just ended up blowing up on you. so you shut up, taking your coat and leaving your and his dorm. it was storming outside, and you needed to blow off steam, and try to calm yourself down before you did anything drastic which you would definitely regret later.
“where are you going?” jake said, following you outside. everything had built up recently and it just now had hit you how much you had been neglecting your own feelings compared to everyone else’s, so you ignored his protests and began to walk to your favourite café. “c’mon, sunshine, you can’t run away forever”
“i got into a university in london” you blurt out. jake looked at you as if you were joking, it was obvious you weren’t, you sighed deeply and turned away from him. “i didn’t tell you because i wanted you to be happy with lily for a while before i left”
“so you were just gonna leave without saying anything?” he says. you couldn’t tell if it were tears or the rain, but something was beginning to fall down your cheeks. “answer me!” he close to yells.
“yes! yes, okay, i was going to leave without saying anything. i didn’t want to make you sad when you had lily” you almost yell back.
there was a pause between the two of you. you could see the gears turning inside jake’s head. it took him a while before he decided to speak again.
“what about me and lily?” he says, taking a step closer to you. you were both at a safe distance from eachother, but another three large strides could change that. you, however, stayed rooted to the spot.
you furrowed your brows in confusion, stammering out a response.
“i… i thought you liked lily? she likes you, so i set you two up” you say. yup, it was definitely tears.
“no? i don’t like lily, well, not like that at least” he pauses “you’re too caught up in matching other people you forgot about yourself. your own needs. you need to find love too, sunshine” he takes a step closer to you, this time you react, taking a step back to distance yourself.
“lily loves you” you whisper “i can’t do that to her” you take another step back.
“for fucks sakes, when will you put other people aside and do something for yourself?” jake says frustratedly.
there was a beat of silence, then two, then three. none of you spoke. you felt like you couldn’t breathe, even though there was so much air. you turned away, running a hand down your face.
“its you. its always been you” jake speaks, you turn around.
“what?” you ask in a tired tone.
“i am in love with you” he takes a step towards you “ever since we were friends as kids. ever since we met eachother, i have been madly in love with you, sunshine. i have never been able to get you out of my goddamn head, and it kills me. it kills me to know you tried to match me up with someone just because you refuse to believe that it is you who somebody is in love with, its you that i am in love with. you have never left my head, your face, your body, your voice. you are the kindest, selfless person i have ever met. you put yourself before anybody else because you don’t like the thought of people getting left out. you always make everyone feel included even if it means you miss out, because you don’t want someone else to be the outcast. your eyes glint when you laugh, you scrunch your nose when you taste something you don’t like, you furrow your brows and bite your lip when you’re concentrated on something” you didn’t notice until now how close he had gotten.
you gasped softly as his fingers met your chin, his thumb and index finger lifting your face up so you were looking at him.
“i love you sunshine, and nothing will ever change that” he whispers before closing the gap between your faces. both of his hands were firmly placed on your cheeks, keeping you in place where you were.
it took you a few seconds to register what was going on, your stomach erupted in butterflies, your body went tingly and your knees almost gave out, but you steadied yourself by wrapping your arms around jake’s neck. it was almost subconscious the way your lips moved against his, the kiss was soft and languid, nothing like you had ever felt before. the kiss was loving, sweet, something that your past relationships never had.
by the time you both pulled away, you were panting a little while gazing into eachother’s sparkling eyes.
“i know everything about you, and you know everything about me” he whispers, “i know what you want the most”
“and what’s that?” you questioned, whispering with him.
“you want love. you want a man to scoop you off of your feet and bow down to you. submit to you” he whispers, his face slowly getting closer and closer to yours, the smirk was evident on his face “but right now? right now your eyes are telling me you want me to take you right back to our dorm and fuck you the way your tight little pussy deserves” then it hit you.
you were eighteen, he was twenty-two, and you were a fucking virgin. by the look on your face, jake’s smirk widened. of course he knew you were a virgin, the both of you told eachother everything, like, everything. he told you the first time he had sex, hell, he even told you what he was into during sex. when he had asked you, you tried to steer off topic, but that’s when he asked if you were a virgin and you said yes, very bashfully. but jake left it, you hadn’t revisited the topic, well, not until now.
“jake i’m-“ he cuts you off.
“a virgin? i know, sunshine. you don’t need to worry, i’ll take care of you” he smiled before lifting you up by the backs of your thighs and wraps them around his waist, supporting your full weight with his large hands on your ass.
it didn’t take long for jake to be kicking the door open to your dorm, kicking it shut behind him and wasting no time to lay you down on the bed. he leaned down to kiss you again, groaning against your lips when your hips involuntarily rolled up into his. you had your fair share of make out sessions, but you didn’t know how to do the full thing.
jake pulled away and looked at you a smirk was still playing on his face. he didn’t waste any time in attacking your neck with kisses, leaving small red bites that would be sure to leave a mark by tomorrow. he kissed down your collarbone, nipping and sucking as he travelled down.
both your clothes had stuck to your body due to the rain, so he had to put a lot of effort in to peel your top off of your body.
“god, you have no idea how long i have been waiting to do this” he whispers against your chest, his hands reaching behind you to unclasp your bra (which he was somehow very skilled in and got it off almost immediately). he attached his lips to one of your tits, sucking and licking the pebbled bud, and massaging the other in his free hand. you let out lewd moans as he did so, and he eventually switched over to the other tit, giving it as much attention as he did the other, before beginning to kiss down your body again.
as he slowly moved down, he whispered soft praises like “so gorgeous” or “so soft and pretty for me, sunshine” before he reached the waistband of your pants. he looked up at you through his lashes before you nodded softly, giving him the answer he needed in order to carry on. again, jake had to peel off your pants, along with your panties. as he got the pants down to your ankles, he sat up on his knees, taking one of your ankles in his hand and taking your shoe off, then moving your pants off fully, before repeating this action on the other. he left small pecks on your shins as he did so.
it didn’t take long before he was settled in-between your legs again, face to face with your glistening cunt.
“god, you’re so wet for me. so pretty sunshine” he muttered, kissing the insides of both of your thighs before moving to your clit, leaving a small peck on it. he smirked as you bucked your hips towards his face and let out a small whimper.
jake decided he had probably teased you enough and grasped at your thighs, pulling you towards him before his mouth attaches to your pussy, licking a thick stripe up before flicking his tongue against your clit. you moan out, your left hand coming down to his hair and tugging gently. with this, jake drifted his hand up to your chest, allowing your right hand to latch onto his finger. you held his index finger in your hand, your full hand wrapping around it.
“so small” he mutters against your cunt, making you squirm in his grasp. jake doesn’t let up, keeping up with sucking and licking at your cunt, your juices dripping down his chin. your moans began to get higher in pitch and a lot more frantic as he made his tongue go faster, fucking it in and out of you, his nose bumping your clit.
you soon felt a tight sensation in your stomach, your pleasure eventually drove you over the edge. and before you knew it, your eyes were rolled back, your head thrown back along with them. your back was arched as liquid left your cunt. jake still didn’t let out, allowing you to ride out your high on his face. soon, parts of your vision began to come back as you came down from your high.
jake was still between your legs, smirking up at you. his chin was slick with your juices, as he got up to eye level with you, he used the back of his hand to wipe off your juices.
“never took you for a squirter, sunshine” jake husks, “i always knew you would taste good, though, but not that good”
you felt so embarrassed. there was no way you just did that. you tried to turn away from him, attempting to roll on your side.
“nuh uh uh” jake tuts, pinning you down underneath him, looking down into your sparkling eyes. “i wanna know what else that pretty mouth of yours can do other than whine and moan while i stick my tongue inside your pretty pussy” he smirks.
jake grabbed his shirt and quickly got rid of it, revealing his toned abs and v-line. he then grabbed your hips and flipped you both so you were sat on his lap while he was sat on the edge of the bed. he grabbed your small hands in his and placed them on his belt. you knew what he was asking you to do, so you quickly removed his belt, peeling down his jeans and boxers. your eyes widened as his length, struggling to take in how big he was. how were you ever going to take him in your mouth? never mind your cunt.
“don’t worry, sunshine. i’ll make sure it fits” he smiles softly, stroking your cheek with his thumb. he helped you down onto your knees in front of him, you swallowed thickly, trying to think of any way you weren’t going to gag on his length. “you aren’t gonna gag, gonna teach you a little trick” you nod in response, settling your palms on his thighs. “you’re gonna put your thumb in the palm of your hand, like this” he shows you what to do, and you copy “then the rest of your fingers are gonna go around your thumb” he does the action, and again, you copy.
he let you get yourself ready and comfortable, before he allowed you to open your mouth and take him inside of it. his hand immediately flew to your hair, tugging harshly before gathering all of it into a ponytail and shoving your face down fully, making you take his full length inside of your mouth.
his tip hit the back of your throat, making you gag a little, but not much before you remembered what jake taught you. jake groans deeply when he feels your throat contract around him.
“fuck, you’re a natural, sunshine” jake husks, his hips rutting up to meet your mouth whenever you bob your head on his cock. he filled your mouth perfectly, a mixture of his pre-cum and your saliva dripping down your chin and onto your bedding. soon, you forgot about the trick jake had taught you as your mouth was too full for you to fully comprehend what he was saying.
it only took a few more gags for jake to be coming down your throat, his length so far into your mouth that it was practically forcing you to swallow every drop he gave you. you sat back up on your knees.
“open” jake had a hold of your chin with his thumb and index finger, forcing you to look up at him. but, you do as he says, opening your mouth so he can see you had swallowed every drop. he smiles and allows you to close your mouth, “good girl” he coos.
jake stands you up and flips you both around so your knees fall over the side of the bed and you fall back onto it. jake attaches his lips to yours, pushing your thighs apart with his forearms. he wasted no time in lining his tip up with your entrance before pulling away from the kiss, his face hovering not far from yours.
“this is gonna hurt for a minute” he whispers, you nod, positioning your hands on his back. you didn’t know what you expected when he pushed his meaty cock inside of you, fulling you up entirely. the stretch was painful at first, but you soon adjusted around the fatness of his dick.
you nodded to give him the good to go, and he took that opportunity. jake took his cock out of your tight pussy, until only the tip remained before pushing back into you at a fast but gentle pace. you whimpered at the feeling, the pleasure mixed with the pain. it was all too much, but it felt so good at the same time.
jake’s pace fastened, and you arched your back into jake. your nails dug into the skin of jake’s back, creating little indents and red marks on his back, occasionally drawing blood. you were too blindsided by pleasure to care, you were most likely going to care later though. above you, jake looked too dazed to care too. he was in love with the feeling of your pussy, how it so snuggly accommodates his length, how it clamps around him whenever he hits that gummy spot inside of you.
all the while, his hand had snuck up to where your hand was om his back, bringing it down to your side and allowing you to wrap your fingers around his index finger as you had done before.
jake pulls your left leg up to press against your chest, your right leg moving around his waist to keep him close, giving him a new angle to slam into you and pistol his hips into yours to abuse your g-spot over and over. you mewled whimpered and whined as he did so, your poor cunny dripping with how good he made you feel, it was impossible not to be so wet when you had the hottest man on earth ramming into your hole with so much force you could practically see stars.
your nails dug into his back even harder, your eyes rolling back and back arching even more when he delivered a particularly hard thrust to that gummy spot inside of you. you moaned out loudly as you came, at this point not caring if anyone had heard your late night shenanigans.
you were too fucked out to care, jake whispering small praises, but his pace never faltered, his hips still pistoling into yours at such a force you almost came again. your slick coated jake’s fat meaty cock as he pulled out and came all over your right thigh with a deep groan of your name.
it took you both a few moments to find eachother again before you gazed into eachother’s eyes. your chests were both heaving, trying to catch your breathes in your post-orgasm bliss. it wasn’t long before jake was up and leaving the room to the attached bathroom. he appeared a few moments later and picked you up bridal style, and taking you to the bathroom. there was a prepared warm bath with bubbles, all for you and him.
he softly placed you in the bathtub, before managing to shimmy in behind you, having you sit in between his legs. you layed your head back into his chest, allowing him to massage your scalp.
“you’re so perfect, your body is so soft and perfect sunshine” he murmurs. “did so good f’me, gonna be a little sore tomorrow, but i’ll help you, don’t worry” he pecks the crown of your head.
“did you really mean what you said before?” you whispered after a while, looking up at him with your doe eyes that he loved so very much.
“about how much i love you, or about how much your pussy needs to be fucked?” he smirks, you swat his chest, but not hard enough for it to hurt.
“yes, i meant it sunshine” he says lowly “i do love you, and i always have” he says softly. he smiles down at you and leans down.
jake presses your lips into a kiss, a lot more soft and sensual from your previous activities.
“but i still did mean what i said about your tight little pussy needing to get fucked. i’m glad you let me be your first, sunshine” he smiles, pulling away from the kiss.
“and i’m glad you agreed to be my first” you smile back, leaning up to press your lips into a kiss once again. fuck lily, you would deal with her in the morning.
“and i’m going with you” jake murmured against your lips.
“jake-“ you try to argue, pulling away from his lips, but he cuts you off.
“i don’t wanna hear it. wherever you go, i go, and i’m always gonna be with you, no matter what” he whispers, pulling you into another kiss.
this time you wouldn’t argue, simply because part of you wanted him to go with you, but you were never going to admit it for as long as you lived.
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chevyslate158 · 2 months ago
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Coriolanus Snow x Reader 18+ - I'll Be Watching You
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A/N: Hey everyone! This little piece is a filler while I work on Chapter 2 of Threads of Freedom (15th Hunger Games AU, Archer Brown x Fem!Reader) – which will be uploaded by the end of the week, I promise! Sorry for the wait and thank you for your patience. This is my first proper dark fic, so as far as I’m aware, this should be 18+ due to mature themes. I hope you all enjoy this little detour, and I’m excited to share more with you soon! Keep an eye out for Chapter 2 – it’s coming soon!
Word Count: 2.3k
Warnings: Abuse (emotional, psychological, and possessive), Dark themes, Toxic relationships (I do not condone this), Non-consensual elements, Violence/Threat of violence, Manipulation, Mentions of sex, Coercion, Stalking and Jealousy let me know if I missed any!
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The night was loud, bustling with voices echoing through the makeshift walls of the Hob, the heart of black-market life in District 12. You'd been busy, making your rounds with the goods your family had sent you to sell, weaving in and out of the rickety stands that filled the dim space. The air was thick with smoke and the scent of stale bread and roasted game. It was the same every night, though tonight, something felt... different.
You felt it before you saw him—a prickling awareness at the back of your neck like someone’s eyes were boring right into you. Glancing up, you saw him standing across the room, the faint glow of a single bare bulb casting shadows over his face. A young peacekeeper, uniform pristine, with piercing blue eyes that didn’t waver when they met yours. Coriolanus Snow.
You’d heard whispers about him—the Capitol boy with ice in his veins who’d recently arrived to serve in District 12. He was unlike the other peacekeepers who draped themselves lazily over chairs or leaned casually against walls. No, Snow stood stiffly, as if he’d never let himself blend into his surroundings, as if he were above it all.
But tonight, he was focused on you.
After that night, Snow began appearing everywhere you went. At first, it was subtle—a figure lingering just far enough away to be nearly invisible but always there, always watching. In the crowded marketplace, in the quiet moments when you paused on your way home. Every time you dared to glance back, his eyes were waiting. He’d give a slight nod, a slow acknowledgment, a silent claim that grew stronger with each day.
Soon, it became impossible to ignore. Snow wasn’t simply watching; he was weaving himself into every part of your life, binding himself to you with an unspoken possessiveness. He knew which paths you took and where you liked to sit by the river, and he’d often appear there, casually positioned as if by chance, though you knew better. When you questioned him, he’d smile, a strange blend of amusement and arrogance in his eyes, as if he enjoyed toying with your sense of control, as if he wanted you to know that your life was no longer entirely your own.
One evening, when you were out trading goods, Snow approached you without warning, slipping into step beside you.
“I don’t like you coming here alone,” he murmured, his voice soft but laced with an edge. “Too many people who don’t have your best interests in mind.”
You tried to brush him off, saying you could handle yourself, but he scoffed, an unsettling smile spreading across his face.
“You don’t understand. You don’t have to be strong or careful. Not with me here.” His words were meant to reassure you, but they settled over you like a shadow, a cold reminder that his protection was not optional, that he would always be there whether you wanted him to be or not.
But he didn’t own you, nor did he control you. Taking a deep breath, you mustered your courage and offered him a polite smile, careful to keep your tone light.
“I appreciate the concern, Coriolanus,” you said, choosing your words delicately. “But I don’t need you looking out for me. I’m fine on my own.”
You could see the faint twitch of his jaw, and a slight narrowing of his eyes, but you ignored it, determined to stand your ground. Before he could reply, you turned on your heel, heading down the narrow path toward home without looking back.
The silence behind you was tense and heavy, but you walked briskly, half-expecting him to let it go. Yet something about the quiet felt wrong, and that prickle of unease crept up your spine once more. Suddenly, you heard him call your name—softly, but with an unmistakable edge.
“I don’t think you understand what I’m saying,” he said, his voice dangerously low. You could feel his footsteps behind you, and before you could quicken your pace, he was by your side again, his eyes dark and unreadable.
“Do you think this is a choice?” His voice was no longer smooth but sharp, each word edged with frustration.
“You don’t just get to walk away.” He reached out, his fingers grazing your arm, his grip tightening when you tried to pull away. “I’m here because you need me. I see the way people look at you, what they think they can take from you.” His gaze bore into yours, and you realised that his frustration ran deeper than anger—it was something primal, possessive, a hunger to control.
“Don’t make this difficult,” he murmured, the unsettling calm in his voice sending a chill through you.
Your pulse quickened as his grip tightened, firm enough to keep you there but not enough to hurt—yet. Snow’s expression shifted, the mask of calm giving way to something far darker. His eyes, usually so controlled, now blazed with a fierce possessiveness that was almost terrifying.
"You think you’re safe here?" he asked, voice barely above a whisper, yet laced with a quiet fury looking down at you as though you were stupid. "This place would swallow you whole if I let it. You have no idea what people are capable of."
His words hung in the air, and you felt a tremor of fear. “Maybe so,” you replied, voice steadier than you felt.
“But that’s my choice, not yours.” You forced yourself to meet his gaze, hoping he’d see the resolve in your eyes, but instead, he laughed softly—a hollow, unsettling sound.
“Your choice?” He echoed, his lips curling into a faint, mocking smile. “No. You don’t understand, do you?” He leaned in close, his breath warm against your cheek, and when he spoke, his voice was both a promise and a warning.
"I know everything about you. I know where you live, the way home, the people you talk to. I know your fears. I don’t just watch, I protect. And whether you like it or not, you’re mine.” He glowered down at you.
You tried to pull away, but his hand tightened, holding you in place as his gaze bore into you with an intensity that made it clear he would never let you go.
“I won’t let anyone else have you,” he continued, his voice low and unwavering, as if stating a fact rather than a threat.
“So stop pretending you can push me away, or ignore me. You belong to me, and I won’t have it any other way.” His grip finally loosened, but the weight of his words lingered, searing into your mind as he released you, his face unreadable.
You backed away, heart racing, aware that this was only the beginning of something that would bind you to him in ways you couldn’t yet understand.
The intensity in his stare held you captive, as though he was daring you to challenge him, to defy the claim he’d just laid upon you. For a brief moment, you thought about running, about putting as much distance as you could between yourself and the figure before you. But something told you he would follow—no matter how far you went, he would always find you.
“I don’t belong to anyone,” you managed, your voice barely above a whisper, defiant yet trembling.
His eyes narrowed, a flicker of something dark and dangerous crossing his face. He took a step closer, closing the distance you’d tried to create.
“You can lie to yourself all you want,” he murmured, each word deliberate, his tone unsettlingly calm. “But you’ll come to understand, in time. I don’t give up on the things I want.” His fingers brushed your cheek, lingering for just a second too long. “And I want you.”
The weight of his declaration settled over you like a shroud, suffocating, and you could feel the force of his obsession surrounding you, pressing in on all sides. His presence was inescapable, a shadow that clung to you, a constant reminder that no matter where you went, his eyes would always be watching, his influence always closing in. The cold, unsettling truth sank in: Snow wasn’t merely infatuated. He saw you as something that belonged to him, something he would protect fiercely—and control completely.
As he finally released you, his gaze softened, a twisted tenderness flickering there. “One day, you’ll see I’m right. I’m the only one who can keep you safe, who can truly understand you.”
His voice dropped to a whisper, his words chillingly soft. “One day, you’ll realise that’s exactly what you need. That I'm exactly what you need.”
Time had passed, and somehow, you found yourself bound to him in ways you never anticipated. His words, his presence, his very being had become woven into your life like an invasive vine, tightening its hold each day. He didn’t give you a choice; his insistence became an inevitability. He declared that he was what you needed, and his grip on your life became as unyielding as the iron-fisted peacekeepers he commanded. Somewhere along the way, resisting felt as exhausting as it did hopeless.
When he was gentle, his touch was light, his words tender as he whispered promises in the quiet moments between you. “No one will ever understand you like I do,” he’d murmur, his fingers tracing soft patterns on your arm.
“They don’t know you the way I do,” He'd say to you breathing down your neck lips grazing your skin when he had you pinned against a cold desolate concrete wall across from the Hob in the dark when he saw you chatting with another man from inside the hob his jealousy overriding his train of thought leading you to where you were at that moment.
Those words made you feel both cherished and trapped, his affection tinged with a possessiveness that stifled you, smothered you. But he saw this as devotion, a twisted loyalty that would bind you to him, even as he twisted your will to fit his.
Yet his moods shifted like shadows, sudden and dark. One wrong word, one misstep, and his gentle touch could turn cold, his smile fading into an unyielding glare.
“Where were you?” he would ask, his voice deceptively calm but his eyes burning with a simmering anger.
“You think you can just slip away whenever you want?” He’d take your wrist, just tight enough to remind you who held control, his grip softening only when he saw the hesitation in your gaze.
He’d pull you close, his voice a possessive whisper. “I won’t let you leave. Don’t even think about it. No one will ever protect you like I will.”
And still, there were moments when he was vulnerable—when his mask slipped, and you could see the frightened boy behind the stern peacekeeper, an illusion to the young boy he once was in the Capitol.
“I’ve lost too much already,” he confessed one night, his voice breaking the quiet of the room, low and strained after the passion that had consumed you both.
A sheen of sweat glistened across your bodies, the air thick with the aftermath of your shared breathless silence. The dim lantern flickered in the corner of your small home, casting a warm glow that only served to make his sharp features more prominent, his icy blue eyes brighter than you’d ever seen them as if the light revealed something deeper—something more fragile. His hand rested protectively over yours intertwining your hand with his, his other arm draped across your frame, tugging you closer as if he could fuse you into him, as though he needed your presence to solidify his reality.
"Don't make me lose you too," he repeated, his voice muffled as he pressed his forehead against yours. You could feel the tremor in his breath, the weight of his words sinking into your skin. The raw vulnerability that had bled through him during those moments of intimacy now lingered in the air, like an unspoken plea that both terrified and touched you. His lips, still warm from the kiss that had left you breathless, moved softly against your forehead as he whispered, "I've already lost so much. I can't bear to lose you too."
You lay there, caught between the storm of desire and the weight of his obsession, feeling the intensity of his emotions wrapped around you like a vice. He wasn’t just holding you physically; he was anchoring himself to you, weaving a web of control and love that was both suffocating and intoxicating.
Every touch felt like a claim, every whispered word a promise you weren't sure you could escape. But in the stillness of that moment, when his heart seemed to beat in time with yours, you wondered if there was a part of him that truly did love you, or if it was simply the fear of losing control over something—someone—he had come to see as his.
His eyes met yours in the low light, searching you, reading you, as though trying to gauge whether you felt the same hunger for him, the same need. You could see it then—the darkness in him that was more than just obsession. It was desperation. Desperation for your love, for your loyalty, for a future where you would never leave him. He was willing to give you everything, but it was clear that everything meant something far different to him than it did to you.
In his mind, you weren’t just a part of his world—you were the only thing worth holding onto, the one thing he could never lose. And in that moment, as the weight of his words settled over you, you realized that you were no longer just a passive observer in this dangerous dance between love and control. You were as bound to him as he was to you, and though you longed for freedom, you couldn't help but wonder if his love for you—his need for you—was something you could ever truly escape.
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rainyvalentines · 9 months ago
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Hard to hate
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pairings…clarisse la rue x daughter of nyx
description…clarisse hates you but can’t help falling for you
warnings…a little angsty
requested…yes
w/c…734 words 3907 characters
an…i hope you like it!! again i finished like the entire thing in one sitting 😋
You had came to camp a few weeks ago and you were quickly claimed. Everyday your mom would give you a little gift like necklaces or bracelets.
You could feel the watching eyes of the camp, specifically a certain daughter of Ares, Clarisse La Rue. Every day you were made fun of and picked on in some way.
She would always glare at you when you did anything, especially if you had gotten a gift. You knew she fought for her father’s attention which she barely got. When she did it was almost always negative.
You felt bad for her but there was nothing you could do for her besides watch.
————————————————————————————— clarisse’s pov
I hate y/n. She always gets attention from her mother. I want that. I deserve the attention.
Today is capture the flag so maybe it’ll distract me. I’m on her team though. I bet you she’s horrible at fighting. She is kinda cute..
We better win this time. I’m tired of loosing every single capture the flag. It was always Athena and the Hermes cabin that won.
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2nd person pov
As you prepare for capture the flag you can still feel Clarisse’s eyes on you. She’s always looking at you, you didn’t even do anything to her.
Your team was talking about the plan and you got put on defense which sucks but better than having to attack the other team.
Capture the flag was starting soon so you got in position. You hear the conch shell blow and yells erupt. You sat on a rock waiting for anything to happen.
You see a group of Athena’s kids running towards you. You quickly stood up and held your sword out. You try to defend yourself but it didn’t work. They overpowered you sending you to the floor.
“We hate kids like you. You aren’t special.” One of the girls spat.
“I didn’t do anything!” Tears started to prick your eyes as she stood above you.
“Why do you get the attention!”
“I-I don’t know what you mean!” You stuttered.
“You always get attention from your mom!”
“That’s not something I can control!”
“I don’t care! You don’t deserve-” She was cut off as someone hit her.
“Get off of her!” You recognized that voice. Clarisse? Why was she saving you?
All the girls quickly ran away at the sight of Clarisse. You looked at Clarisse who quickly runs after them.
“What the fuck..” You murmur. You get up and walk to the beach. As you stand there you start to cry. “I can’t control my mom..”
It was stupid they attacked you just because of your mom. So many people at the camp did that. They were jealous or just hated you for no reason. You never had hurt anyone or was rude. They didn’t have a reason to hate you, they just did.
You saw a kid from the Hermes cabin with their flag. You sighed as they won the game, again.
After a few minutes passed you heard someone walking on the rocks. “You okay?” Of course it was Clarisse.
“I’m fine..what do you want?”
“I just saw you alone and it looked like you were crying.”
“It’s nothing. Why do you care?”
“Are you sure cause you’re literally sobbing.”
“I’m tired of everyone hating me because of my mom! I didn’t even do anything!”
“I don’t hate you..” She muttered under her breath.
“What..?”
“Nothing!”
“I thought you hated me..”
“I could never..I like you”
You glanced up at her. She likes you?
“I-I like you too..”
“Really?” She sat down beside you. “Do you wanna be my girlfriend?”
“I’d like that..” You mumbled. She softly grabbed your chin and kissed you gently. Your heart was beating a million times per second.
“I’m sorry you thought I hated you..I was just jealous that you got so much love from your mom..My dad doesn’t really do that for me..”
“It’s okay..” You lean into her. Her hand wrapped around your waist as she rested her head on yours.
“I love you..”
You giggle. “I see we aren’t trying to beat the stereotypes? I love you too..”
“Oh shut up! Come on I’ll walk to back to your cabin.”
“Thank you. Truly, you saved me from the Athena girls”
“It’s no problem” She kissed your temple as you walked to your cabin.
Maybe this camp isn’t that bad.
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criminal-act7 · 3 months ago
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Don't mess with my man
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Blk reader
Genre: fluff (for once)
Summary: One day during a case, Spencer gets jealous of some officers flirting with you, so he stepped in to get you. Since then, the BAU team has noticed your closeness and teased you both about your obvious feelings. During a night out, you get jealous when a woman flirts with Spencer, prompting you to step in and claim him as your boyfriend.
Warnings: jealousy, mild possessiveness
Notes: This song is stuck in my head. I also posted this on my K-pop blog, but I took it off real quick.
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Spencer stood in the corner, his arms crossed, watching you as you spoke to the two young officers. The way you commanded their attention was effortless, a mix of professionalism and that unique charm of yours that always made people gravitate toward you. You were explaining to them what you did in the BAU, your hands moving expressively as you broke down your role with clarity and confidence. But Spencer could tell—the officers weren’t just listening because they were interested in your work.
They were flirting with you.
And, as usual, you hadn’t noticed.
It had been like this ever since you joined the team. At first, Spencer found your energy irritating. You were too happy, too bubbly, especially for someone working in a unit as serious and grim as the Behavioral Analysis Unit. He couldn't understand how you could be so cheerful when your job involved dealing with the worst of humanity.
But then, he saw you in the field. The first time he saw that shift—how you could still be warm and engaging, yet instantly serious and direct when needed—something shifted in him, too. You weren’t naive. You were strong, and your optimism was a choice, not a weakness.
He hadn’t meant to warm up to you. But you made it impossible not to. You were funny, kind, a good listener. You brought an energy to the team that helped them all, even in the darkest moments. And to top it all off, you were beautiful. But Spencer couldn’t ask you out. He didn’t think you’d be interested in him. Why would you be? You were the life of the party, the person everyone liked, and he… well, he was awkward, introverted, more comfortable with books than people.
Which is why he found himself here, leaning against the wall, trying to pretend he wasn’t watching the officers flirt with you. He clenched his jaw, feeling a knot in his stomach. You deserved better than that. They didn’t even care about what you were saying; they were just focused on how you looked. But Spencer knew you—really knew you—and he liked you for so much more than your appearance.
As he watched, one of the officers laughed a little too loudly at something you said, leaning in closer. Spencer rolled his eyes. They were so obvious.
You, on the other hand, seemed oblivious, smiling politely as you continued your explanation. Spencer knew you weren’t interested—you were always so professional when it came to your work. But it still bugged him. You sat on the desk looking pretty, and you didn’t even realize how pretty you were. Your soft wine colored off the shoulder top, complemented your brown skin with your light blue washed jeans. Your hair was braided up which was usual but this was a fresh this time. Then you wore your glasses they were fake but you liked having a different look to you and Spencer liked it. It was something about your glasses that made you ten times more attractive.
Morgan, ever perceptive, glanced between Spencer and the officers before smirking. "Pretty boy, I know that look," he teased, sidling up to Spencer. "You’re not jealous, are you?"
“What? No,” Spencer replied quickly, pushing his hands into his pockets, trying to keep his face neutral.
Morgan chuckled, clearly not buying it. “So you're just gonna let them flirt with your girl like that?”
Spencer bristled, his voice defensive. "She's not my girl."
Morgan raised an eyebrow and leaned in a little closer. "The way you're eyeing her says otherwise, jealous boy."
"I'm not jealous, and those guys aren't even that good looking," Spencer shot back, a little more heat in his voice than he intended. He looks at the guys again as they say something to make you giggle.
Morgan barked out a laugh, clapping a hand on Spencer’s shoulder. "Wow, you really are jealous. It’s okay, man. Happens to the best of us." Spencer tried to brush it off, but he couldn’t help glancing back at you, still in conversation with the officers. They were standing too close, and their smiles were just a little too wide for Spencer’s liking. He wondered what was so funny? It couldn't had been about the case.
“You know Hotch is gonna round us up soon,” Morgan said, his tone shifting to something more serious, though still playful. “You should go get her, pretty boy.”
Spencer furrowed his brow. "Why do I have to get her?"
Morgan grinned, stepping back toward the other room. “Because I'm not the one sitting in the corner jealous," he sang teasingly, disappearing through the doorway.
Spencer sighed, glancing one last time at you and the officers before pushing himself off the wall. Maybe Morgan was right... but he still wasn't sure if he was ready to admit it.
He took a deep breath and stepped forward, his heart pounding a little harder than usual. He wasn’t sure what he was going to say, but he couldn’t just stand there any longer.
"Hey," he interrupted, his voice calm but firm, "we need to wrap up here. We have a briefing in ten."
You turned to him, flashing that bright smile of yours. "Got it, Reid."
The officers seemed disappointed but nodded, glancing at you one last time before walking away. As they left, Spencer stayed by your side, and you gave him a curious look.
"Everything okay?" you asked, tilting your head slightly.
Spencer shrugged, trying to act casual. "Yeah, I just... thought it was time to go."
You smiled again, this time softer, more genuine. "Thanks for the rescue. Those two were nice, but I think they were more interested in... other things." You say as Spencer nods at you of course you picked up on their disinterest of the original topic.
Spencer couldn’t help but laugh, shaking his head. "Yeah, I noticed."
"Why didn’t you say anything sooner?" you ask him confused as to why didn't he come to get you earlier. Spencer hesitated for a second, unsure of what to say. Then he looked at you, his heart racing, and said, "I didn’t think you'd notice."
Your eyes met his, and for a moment, the air between you shifted. It was subtle, but it was there. You smiled again, this time more thoughtful. "I always notice you, Spencer." You go into the room taking a seat. Spencer couldn't help but blush at what you said. When he goes in the room Morgan looks at him smugly as he takes a seat next to Emily while you sit in the front next to Rossi. Before he could ask how it went Hotch started talking.
The case was finally wrapped up, and you were just about ready to head back when one of the officers approached you, flashing the same charming smile he’d been using all week. Spencer, standing off to the side, rolled his eyes. Not this again.
The officer started his usual routine, laying it on thick. “You’re really something, you know that? A top-notch agent and, well, very easy on the eyes,” he added with a wink. You were about to say something but the guy cut you off.
Before the guy could even work up to asking for your number, Spencer decided he’d had enough. He walked over, his long strides quickening as the officer’s compliment landed. “Hey, sorry to interrupt,” Spencer said, cutting in smoothly, “but we really need to get going.”
The officer blinked, momentarily thrown off. “Oh, can I just—?”
“Sorry, no time,” Spencer replied quickly. Without giving the officer a chance to recover, he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, steering you away from the conversation. “We’ve got a flight to catch.”
You let Spencer guide you, surprised at the sudden shift. Once you were a few paces away, you glanced up at him, an amused smile creeping onto your face.
“Spence, what was that about? You’re acting weird.”
“It’s nothing,” he said, his voice a little too fast. “I mean, we do have a flight, and Hotch is waiting for us. He’s our ride.”
You raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. “Uh-huh. Right.” You knew Hotch was still inside talking to the sheriff. Spencer tried to focus on the path ahead, but the warmth of your shoulder under his arm and the way you were looking at him made it hard to concentrate. “What? We do need to go,” he added, but you could hear the slight defensiveness in his voice. You just smiled, not pushing the subject for now, but filing it away for later. Spencer was acting strange—endearing, but definitely strange. And you had a pretty good idea why.
Later on the plane, you were sitting with Emily and J.J., enjoying some much-needed downtime. It didn’t take long for them to start teasing you.
“So,” Emily began with a mischievous grin, “what was up with those two officers back at the precinct?”
You blinked, caught off guard. “Wait, how did you know about that?” you asked, glancing between the two of them. You had thought the flirting had gone mostly unnoticed, at least by everyone except you and Spencer.
J.J. laughed, leaning in a little closer. “It was kind of hard not to notice. Those guys were practically hovering around you the entire time.”
“Yeah,” Emily chimed in, “the way they were looking at you? They were definitely interested. Did they give you their numbers?”
You shook your head, smiling at the memory of Spencer’s intervention. “Nope. Spencer got to me before they could. Honestly, I’m glad. I didn’t want to have to turn them down like that. They weren’t my type.”
At that, Emily and J.J. exchanged a glance before bursting into laughter. “Spencer got to you first, huh?” J.J. teased, a knowing gleam in her eye.
“Oh, this is even better than I thought,” Emily added, smirking. “So, did our genius save you, or did you just let him swoop in?”
You felt your face flush. “Come on, it wasn’t like that. He just... helped me out of an awkward situation, that’s all.”
“Right,” Emily said, drawing out the word as if she didn’t believe you for a second. “Sure, just helping you out.”
Their teasing continued, with both of them throwing in playful comments about Spencer’s timing and how convenient it was. Despite your protests, you couldn’t help but smile at the whole situation. Maybe there was more to it than you were willing to admit.
Meanwhile, a few rows up, Spencer was sitting next to Hotch. He had a faint smile on his face, one he didn’t even realize was there. Hotch glanced over, noticing the unusual expression.
“Everything okay?” Hotch asked, a little confused by Spencer’s out-of-character behavior.
“Yeah,” Spencer said, his voice calm but laced with an odd sense of contentment. “Everything’s fine.” Hotch said nothing more, but a flicker of understanding crossed his face. He had a pretty good guess at what was going on but kept it to himself.
Across the aisle, Rossi leaned over to Morgan, who had been watching the whole scene unfold from the start. Morgan smirked, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction. “My man,” Morgan whispered, nodding toward Spencer with approval.
Spencer, oblivious to all the glances and whispers, sat there quietly. Nothing between you two had really changed, but the way you’d looked at him earlier, and the fact that you’d let him whisk you away from the officers—it felt like the start of something, something... And for now, that was enough.
After the case, the team couldn't help but notice how close you and Spencer had become. Whether it was holding hands absentmindedly or you resting your head on his shoulder during long flights, it seemed like you two were always in sync. To anyone watching, it was obvious that something was going on between you two, but to you and Spencer, you were just friends. Sure, there were feelings simmering beneath the surface, but both of you were oblivious to them.
One day, after a particularly long and exhausting case, Hotch decided the team needed a break. As a reward for all the hard work, he gave everyone the next day off. To celebrate, Emily, Garcia, and Morgan started making plans to go out that night. Morgan, always the social one, immediately turned to Spencer.
“Come on, pretty boy, you should come out with us,” Morgan said, nudging Spencer, who predictably shook his head.
“I don’t really think—” Spencer started, but then he overheard Emily ask you if you were coming along.
“Are you kidding?” you said enthusiastically. “I’ve been dying to go out. I just need to go home and change first, but I’ll meet you guys there.”
Spencer hesitated for a moment, but when he saw the excitement on your face, he changed his mind. “Actually… I think I’ll go too.”
Garcia, overhearing this, snickered to herself. “Reid is so whipped,” she whispered, watching the two of you walk ahead together.
Emily, unable to resist, leaned in and quietly shared, “Did you guys notice the other day on the plane to South Dakota? She was holding Spencer’s hand the entire flight, and she didn’t even realize it.”
Morgan grinned, adding, “Oh, and last week? She fixed Spencer’s hair during the briefing, and the guy practically lit up like a Christmas tree.”
As the three of them exchanged knowing looks, you and Spencer, now a few steps ahead, suddenly noticed the group lagging behind. You glanced back and asked, “Hey, what’s going on back there?”
Morgan, Emily, and Garcia immediately straightened up, all of them wearing innocent expressions. “Nothing!” they chorused in unison, clearly hiding something.
You gave them a skeptical look but shrugged it off, turning back to Spencer as the two of you continued chatting. Meanwhile, behind you, the trio exchanged glances, silently agreeing that it was time to take matters into their own hands.
“So, what’s the plan to get those two together?” Emily whispered to Garcia.
“Oh, I have a few ideas,” Garcia replied, a mischievous grin forming on her lips. “They’re halfway there already; they just need a little push.”
Morgan chuckled. “Count me in. Let’s make sure tonight is very interesting.” As you and Spencer unknowingly walked into their plot, you continued to talk about your plans for the night, completely unaware of the matchmaking scheme brewing behind you. For now, you were just looking forward to a fun night out with your friends—and, of course, Spencer, who somehow made every moment feel just a little bit better.
Garcia, Emily, and Morgan waited at the bar, excitement buzzing in the air as they plotted their next move to bring you and Spencer together. Emily had devised a plan, making up an excuse about why Spencer couldn’t ride with them, and it had worked perfectly. You had hesitated at first, unsure about being a bother, but Spencer insisted he wanted to come with you, making you feel a little more at ease.
The three of them settled into a booth, sipping drinks and keeping an eye on the entrance. Emily leaned in closer, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “So, what’s our game plan for tonight? We need to get them talking more, maybe even dancing.”
Garcia nodded enthusiastically. “Definitely! And we should definitely have Spencer and her sit next to each other when they get here. That’ll give them a chance to get closer.”
Morgan leaned back in his seat, smirking. “You guys are way too obvious. It’s going to be hilarious to watch him squirm.”
Just then, they saw you walk in, and the conversation halted. You looked stunning in a fitted dress that hugged your figure perfectly, and the knee-high boots you wore added a fierce touch. Garcia couldn’t help herself. “Wow, look at her! That dress is incredible!”
“Check out those boots!” Emily added, eyes wide. “She looks amazing.”
Morgan grinned widely, his gaze shifting to Spencer, who was right behind you, taking in the sight of you with an appreciative look. “And look at Spencer. He’s practically checking her out.”
As if on cue, Spencer reached out, wrapping an arm around your waist, and you smiled up at him. “Oh my God, Derek!” Penelope exclaimed, barely containing her excitement.
It wasn’t until you spotted them that Spencer lets go of you as you pulled Spencer over to the table. As you approached the booth, you spotted them and your face lit up. “Hey, guys!” you greeted happily, your voice brightening the atmosphere around the table. “Sorry I’m 30 minutes late!”
“Not a problem at all!” Garcia said, a sly smile playing on her lips.
Morgan chuckled, leaning forward. “We were just getting an eyeful of your fashion choices. You look fantastic!”
“Thanks!” you replied, a little bashfully. “I wanted to look nice for tonight.” You paused, glancing at Spencer, who stood next to you, his expression unreadable.
“Well, it’s working,” Emily said with a wink. “You definitely caught our attention.”
You grinned, appreciating the compliment. “I’ll get the first round. What does everyone want?” you asked, taking out your phone to note their orders.
As you walked away to the bar, Emily, Garcia, and Morgan wasted no time in turning their focus to Spencer.
“So,” Emily started, feigning innocence, “what do you think of her outfit?”
Spencer, caught off guard, stammered, “Uh, it’s…nice.” He quickly looked away, his cheeks tinged with a hint of pink.
Garcia giggled, nudging him playfully. “Nice? Is that all you’ve got, pretty boy? She looks stunning!”
“Come on, Reid,” Morgan chimed in, a teasing grin on his face. “You’re clearly checking her out. Don’t hide it!”
Spencer sighed, knowing he was trapped. “I just—”
“Just what?” Emily pressed, leaning in closer. “Do you like her or not?”
“I mean, she’s great,” Spencer finally admitted, his voice a mix of admiration and embarrassment. “We’re just friends.”
“Right,” Garcia said, barely containing her laughter. “Friends who hold hands and check each other out.”
“Reid, you’ve got it bad,” Morgan teased, leaning closer. “You can’t even hide it.”
Spencer shrugged, attempting to play it cool, but the flush creeping up his neck gave him away. “I just think she looks great,” he replied, trying to sound nonchalant.
Morgan chimed in, pointing at Spencer. “Seriously, man, you were totally checking her out.”
Spencer shook his head, trying to play it cool, but the slightest blush crept into his cheeks. “We just drove here together; it’s not a big deal.”
Emily smirked, leaning in closer. “Not a big deal? You were holding her waist! What happened when you two left? Did something happen?”
“Nothing happened,” Spencer replied quickly, trying to keep his tone light. “I just stayed in the car while she changed at the apartment.”
Morgan chimed in, pointing at Spencer with a teasing grin. “Seriously, man, you were totally checking her out.”
Spencer shook his head, trying to play it cool, but the slightest blush crept into his cheeks. “We just drove here together; it’s not a big deal.”
Emily smirked, leaning in closer. “Not a big deal? You were holding her waist! What happened when you two left? Did something happen?”
“Nothing happened,” Spencer replied quickly, striving to keep his tone light. “I just stayed in the car while she changed at the apartment.”
“Yeah, and you let her go out in that dress?” Emily shot back, her eyebrow raised.
“I mean, that’s none of my business. We’re not together,” he said, trying to sound indifferent.
“Not yet,” Garcia piped in, her enthusiasm unabated. “But you act like it. Make your move!”
Before Spencer could respond, Emily glanced around, her expression shifting slightly. “Where is Y/N, by the way? She’s been gone for too long getting those drinks.”
The three of them turned their heads toward the bar, and then suddenly caught sight of you on the dance floor. You were laughing and dancing with some girls, completely in your element.
Garcia, eyes sparkling with mischief, nudged Spencer. “You should go get her!”
Spencer hesitated, watching you dance. The way you moved, carefree and joyful, made him smile to himself. He didn’t want to interrupt your fun, but the teasing from his friends was starting to grate on his nerves.
“Come on, don’t just sit there,” Emily said, nudging him again. “You’re missing your chance.”
“Yeah, man, go get your girl!” Morgan chimed in, his voice playful yet encouraging.
Spencer felt the warmth of their gazes on him, urging him to take action. He glanced back at you, laughing and dancing as if the world didn’t exist. Maybe he could just watch a little longer, but as Emily’s teasing began again, he decided he didn’t want to be the wallflower anymore.
“Okay, okay,” Spencer finally relented, standing up from the booth. He took a deep breath, feeling a rush of determination. “I’ll go get her and grab the drinks.”
As he walked toward you, he could feel the weight of his friends’ encouragement behind him, but he also felt a thrill of nerves. This was different. You were different. With each step, he knew he wanted to take that leap, and tonight might just be the night. He continues to watch you dance your body moving to the beat of the song. You were having fun that was clear he admired how much your smile lit his whole world. He didn't want to remind you about the drinks so he went to the bar got the drinks himself and went back to the table.
You were on the dance floor, having the time of your life, but as the music slowed and your feet began to ache, you made your way back to the booth. Emily, Garcia, and Morgan were already there, sipping on their drinks, and that’s when it hit you—you had completely forgotten to bring them their drinks.
"Sorry, guys! I got caught up," you apologized, genuinely feeling bad.
“No worries,” Morgan grinned, glancing over at Garcia. “Spencer took care of the first round. He was supposed to come get you, but you were a little busy dancing.”
You chuckled sheepishly, glancing around the bar. “I’m sorry again. I didn’t realize.” You had to remind yourself to get the next round of drinks and spend two drinks on Spencer. Feeling guilty that he had to pay for drinks you offered to get in the first place.
“Speaking of which,” Emily said, leaning back in her seat with a smirk, “Spencer was supposed to be getting us another round, but he’s taking his sweet time. He’s probably distracted by the blonde at the bar.”
Your gaze snapped to the bar, and sure enough, Spencer was chatting with a tall blonde woman, who was laughing and leaning in a little too close for your comfort. You rolled your eyes, muttering, “She’s Cute,” in a snarky tone crossing your arms. As you eyed her up and down from a distance.
Garcia’s eyes lit up at your reaction, picking up on the jealousy you were trying to hide. “Ooh, look at you,” she teased. “She’s been talking to him for the past 20 minutes. Seems pretty cozy, huh?”
You waved your hand dismissively. “He’s just being nice. That’s how Spencer is.” You say Spencer was a nice guy especially when it came to women. He wasn’t awkward as most people saw him at least not with you. You both were inseparable spending time with each other in and out of work or talking late at night after cases.
Emily, always quick to stir the pot, leaned in closer, her voice playful. “Are you jealous?”
“No,” you replied, too quickly. The word came out sharper than you intended, which only made Morgan grin wider.
“Right. You’re not jealous at all,” he said, teasing you further. “Because, you know, you haven’t been clinging to Spencer this whole time or anything. It’s not obvious that you like him.” You tried to laugh it off, but their teasing hit a nerve. You didn’t deny your closeness to Spencer, but you weren’t about to confirm it either. Who wouldn't fall for Spencer? He was nice, smart, caring for his friends you included, and he good looking in your eyes. You especially liked when he spoke his nerdy genius facts, you always liked learning and you soaked up his facts like he was storyteller of facts.
“We’re just friends.” You say as that was the truth despite you wanting to be more. You knew feeling jealous was wrong but if Spencer wanted to date someone it was out of your control.
As the others exchanged knowing looks, you found yourself glancing back at the bar. The blonde was still there, her fingers twirling a strand of hair as she laughed at something Spencer was explaining. Your stomach twisted, and you hated that you felt this way. Spencer wasn’t yours, and he could talk to whoever he wanted. But still… something about it didn’t sit right with you.
Morgan, noticing your silence, nudged you again. “You sure you’re not jealous? Because it kinda looks like you are.”
You straightened up, forcing yourself to stay calm. “She’s a tall, bleach blonde with a 36D cup, and she’s probably pretending to understand whatever Spencer’s talking about. She’s got nothing on me. And besides, the only blondes I like Spencer with are Garcia and J.J.”
Emily and Morgan exchanged a glance, and Garcia practically cackled. They could tell you were trying to downplay your feelings, but your words only revealed how fired up you really were.
It wasn’t until you saw the blonde reach out and touch Spencer—first his arm, then his hair—that you had finally had enough. “You know what? The next round’s on me,” you said, abruptly standing up from the booth.
As you strode toward the bar, Garcia couldn’t contain her excitement. “Oh, this is it. This is the moment!” she squealed, practically bouncing in her seat.
Morgan and Emily high-fived, pleased with how their little mission was playing out. They had been waiting for a moment like this, and now it seemed like you were finally about to act on your feelings.
You didn’t care what anyone thought anymore. Watching that woman touch your Spencer like that ignited something inside you. As you approached the bar, your heart raced, but your steps were confident, purposeful. Spencer might not even realize what was happening, but you knew one thing for sure—you weren’t going to let some random blonde take your place by his side.
You approached the bar quietly, trying to catch the conversation the blonde woman was having with Spencer. She was leaning into him, laughing and commenting on how good he looked for an FBI agent. A wave of possessiveness surged through you, and before you could think twice, you walked up behind him and wrapped your arms around his waist. Spencer, caught off guard, glanced up at you, confusion flickering across his face.
“Hey, Spence, did you get the drinks for the others?” you asked, casually resting your chin on his shoulder. The blonde woman looked at you eyeing you like you did her. You swayed back and forth and Spencer as usual let you. To him and you this was normal but you wanted to give her the idea that he was taken.
“Oh yeah, that’s right! I’m sorry, I forgot,” he mumbled.
“No worries, I should’ve gotten the drinks when I had the chance,” you replied sweetly.
The blonde wasn’t done with him though. “Spencer! You were saying?” she interrupted, her voice laced with annoyance as she tried to pull his attention back to her. But it was all on you as you two had your own conversation.
Spencer blinked. “Huh?”
You leaned into him more, almost daring her with your eyes. “Oh, I’m sorry, did I interrupt something?” you asked, knowing exactly what you were doing.
“Yes—” Heather began, but Spencer quickly cut her off, clearly sensing the rising tension.
“No. Not at all. We were just talking about our jobs at the BAU… Oh, Y/N, this is- uhhh Heather! Her name is Heather,” Spencer introduced her awkwardly, stumbling over his words. You didn’t move from him, still holding onto his shoulders as if to make it clear to Heather that Spencer wasn’t going anywhere.
You eyed her up and down and rolled your eyes. “Heather, huh? Cool name. I'm Y/n ” you said, not bothering to hide your disdain. You reach past Spencer to shake her hand trying not to be rude to Spencer.
Heather’s smile faltered slightly. “You work with Spencer?”
“Oh yeah,” you replied, turning to Spencer with a sweet smile as you ran your hand through his hair, fixing it just how you liked. “We work tons of hours together, we're really...close aren't we, Spence?” you ask looking to him for his answer. Spencer didn’t understand it but he knew you were acting strange. Your tone the way your body language was different.
Spencer nodded, a little too enthusiastically. “Yeah, we do. Actually, we just got the day off tomorrow!”
You rolled your eyes again, internally groaning. As much as you adored him, he was too polite to recognize that Heather was blatantly flirting. Or maybe he did know but wasn’t sure how to shut it down. Or he could be interested in her but you didn’t let that thought linger any longer.
Heather’s eyes gleamed. “Oh, are you free tomorrow night?”
Before Spencer could even think of answering, you spoke up. “No, he’s not,” you said quickly, your voice firm.
Heather blinked, clearly taken aback. “I was talking to Spencer,” she said, her voice icy.
“And I told you, he’s not free,” you repeated, stepping closer to him, almost in front of him now.
Heather wasn’t giving up so easily. She gently nudged you aside, leaning in closer to Spencer. “Anyway, Spencer, are you free tomorrow?” you felt your body get hotter by the second she spoke. The urge not to hit her when she touched you, as you knew you'd be wrong if you did.
Spencer shifted awkwardly, clearly uncomfortable. “I—uh—I mean—”
Before he could finish, you cut in again, your jealousy bubbling over. “He has a girlfriend,” you blurted out, shocking both Spencer and Heather.
Spencer’s eyes widened in surprise, and you could feel his gaze on you. If he didn’t know you were jealous before, he definitely knew now.
Heather crossed her arms, her expression skeptical. “I don’t see her, and he hasn’t mentioned her.”
You stepped forward, standing your ground. “I’m right here.”
Heather’s eyes narrowed as she looked you up and down. “Please. You’re just jealous that Spencer’s interested in me. You don’t have any claim on him just because you work together.” Spencer looked at you wondering what your next move was, you didn't deny that you were jealous not once. Nor did he deny that you were his girlfriend, he could but he didn't want to. He tries not to smile but then he looks back at you as you grew quiet.
You were practically shaking with anger, but her words hit you harder than you expected. She wasn’t entirely wrong—you weren’t Spencer’s girlfriend, and this was starting to feel like a massive embarrassment. But just as your thoughts started to spiral, Spencer stepped in.
“Here are your drinks, miss,” the bartender said, sliding the drinks over to you and Spencer. He thought this was the perfect time to get the two of you away from Heather and back to your friends.
Spencer set the drinks down and took your hand in his, placing his other hand gently on your shoulder. His touch was grounding, and when he spoke, his voice was calm and reassuring. “It’s okay, Y/N. You don’t have anything to prove. I’ve got the drinks; let’s head back.” He wanted you to know there was nothing to worry about, he wasn't interested in Heather. Not even attracted to her, as he holds your hand and whispers in your ear how you're here to spend time with friends and have a good time. You smiled, feeling instantly soothed. He knew just what to say to ease your frustration. You look at him and he looks at you with hearts in your eyes like nothing else mattered. And it didn’t. The two of you leave heading over to your friends. But Heather wasn’t done though.
“Spencer, wait—if you’re free tomorrow, call me,” she said, handing him a napkin with her number on it.
Before you could react, Spencer turned and walked back to the bar, trying to give the napkin back. “Look, you seem really nice, and you’re very pretty, but I’m not interested.” You didn't notice Spencer wasn’t by your side at first but Emily and Penelope gave you a look as you turned to see Spencer stuck again. You leave the drinks at the table and go back over to Spencer. You sneak up from behind him listening to Heather’s desperate attempt to get with your genius.
Heather huffed, clearly not taking the rejection well. “Come on, Spencer. Are you really just trying to spare her feelings?” Heather refers to you as Spencer thinks about his next words carefully.
Spencer shook his head. “I’m not sparing her feelings because we work together. I’m sparing your feelings because I love her. For a long time and she feels the same way” Spencer says confidently as Heather scoffs.
The confession hit you like a ton of bricks, and you stopped in your tracks, staring at him wide-eyed. Did he just say he loved you? Well this was the time for you to say what you needed to say.
You stepped in front of him, your heart racing. Spencer looked at you, his expression soft, almost hopeful, as if he wasn’t sure you heard him. He didn't know what you were going to say, but he felt
“My name is Y/N, I have a name so say it.” you said, snapping back to Heather. “And you’re right. I am his coworker. But I can have him anytime I want to. So, thank you. You gave me the strength to fight for the man I love, but I’m not going to, because I’ve realized there’s no competition. You can't compare to me. This is my man, together or not and he certainly doesn’t want you, maybe if you weren't so desperate Heather you'd know that. So go find your own man and don't touch mine. We’re leaving now. Goodbye.”
With that, you turned and walked away, Spencer following closely behind, still reeling from what just happened. You called him yours. You were actually jealous and to him you looked pretty hot. He was used to you being so nice and he's seen you angry during cases but this felt different. Spencer takes you hand as you go back to the booth where your friends were waiting. The moment they saw the two of you, a chorus of cheers erupted from the table, and you couldn’t help but laugh.
"Finally!" Garcia squealed, clapping her hands. Emily raised her glass, and even Morgan was grinning ear to ear.
"Looks like the mission was a success," Morgan teased, and Spencer just shook his head, smiling, as he held your hand a little tighter. The two of you didn't discuss your obvious feelings not while you were being teased. But you both knew at sometime in the future hopefully tomorrow you'd talk about it.
As you and Spencer left the bar that night, you insisted on driving him home. The night had been fun, but you felt like there were some things left unsaid—especially after the events at the bar. Spencer agreed, quietly watching you as you drove, his eyes curious but gentle, clearly wondering what was on your mind.
When you pulled up in front of his apartment, you turned off the engine but didn’t make any move to get out. Instead, you turned to face him, gathering your thoughts before speaking.
“I wanted to talk about what happened earlier,” you began, your voice a little hesitant. Spencer raised an eyebrow, waiting for you to continue.
“I know I kind of... jumped in with that girl, and I didn’t handle it the best way,” you admitted, glancing down at your hands on the steering wheel. “It’s just... I got jealous. I don’t usually get like that, but when I saw her flirting with you, I couldn’t help it. And I guess that’s because—well, because I have feelings for you, Spencer.” You took in a deep breath looking up at him, waiting for his reaction. Spencer’s eyes softened, and a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
“I figured that might’ve been why you did it,” he said, his voice gentle. “But... I should probably confess something too.” Your heartbeat quickened as you waited for him to continue.
“I was jealous too,” he admitted, his gaze dropping slightly. “Remember those two guys at the police station about a month ago? They wouldn’t stop flirting with you, and... I hated it. I didn’t know how to deal with it, because I wasn’t sure if you felt the same way about me, and I didn’t want to risk messing things up between us.”
You blinked in surprise. “You were jealous? Of them? They're not my type”
Spencer nodded. “Yeah. I mean, you’re funny, kind, smart, beautiful—why wouldn’t they flirt with you? But it drove me crazy. And then tonight... seeing you claim me like that at the bar... it was, uh... kind of hot, to be honest.”
Your cheeks warmed at his confession, and you laughed softly. “Kind of hot?”
Spencer smiled a little wider, his eyes brightening. “Okay, very hot,” he corrected. “But more than that, it just reminded me how much I care about you. I guess what I’m trying to say is... I’ve had feelings for you for a while. And after tonight... I think it’s pretty clear that I’m your man now, just like you said.”
Your heart fluttered at his words, and you felt a warmth spread through your chest. You couldn’t help but smile as you leaned closer, gently pressing your lips to his. The kiss was soft, sweet, and everything you had hoped it would be. When you finally pulled back, Spencer was grinning, a little dazed, as if the kiss had left him breathless.
“So... does that mean we’re officially a couple?” you asked, still smiling.
Spencer nodded, his eyes twinkling. “I’d say so.” The two of you hold hands and sit in silence as Spencer looks at your lips again.
"Can we kiss again?" Spencer asked, his voice soft and a little shy, making you chuckle.
“You don’t have to ask, Spence. Just do it.”
Without hesitation, Spencer leaned in, and the two of you started kissing again. This time, it was deeper, more passionate. His hand rested gently on the back of your neck, and you found yourself pulling him closer, your fingers running through his hair, tugging lightly as the kiss became more intense.
Spencer responded eagerly, his other hand settling on your waist as you melted into each other. The air in the car felt warmer, filled with the heat of the moment. His lips moved against yours with a newfound confidence, and you could feel the electricity between you, making your heart race faster.
As you both paused for a breath, his forehead resting against yours, Spencer smiled, his breath a little ragged. "You know," he whispered, "this might be the best night of my life."
You laughed softly, still catching your own breath. "Well, it's not over yet."
Spencer's eyes sparkled at that, and before he could say anything else, you pulled him back in for another kiss, losing yourselves in each other all over again.
When you finally needed to cool down you leaned back in your seat, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a moment, just enjoying the shared understanding between you.
Then, Spencer’s smile turned teasing. “You know, I kind of like jealous Y/N. It’s a new side of you.”
You rolled your eyes playfully. “Oh, shut up. I wasn’t that jealous.”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “You totally were. You didn’t even let me answer her when she asked if I was free tomorrow.”
“Okay, fine, maybe I was jealous,” you admitted, laughing. “But only because you’re mine now.”
Spencer’s smile softened at that, and he reached over to take your hand, intertwining your fingers. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
You both sat there for a little longer, basking in the comfort of your new relationship. It felt right—like everything had finally fallen into place. And as you sat there holding hands, you knew that this was just the beginning of something special between you and Spencer.
Monday morning, you and Spencer walked into the BAU together, and Garcia was waiting at her desk with an eager smile. "So... how was the date yesterday?" she asked, practically buzzing with excitement.
“It was great,” you answered, though you couldn’t help but smile when Spencer, standing beside you, started launching into the specifics. “We went to the museum, grabbed dinner, and—”
You gave him a playful nudge. “Spence, she doesn’t need to know everything.”
“Oh, but I do!” Garcia’s eyes gleamed. “This is exciting! You two are finally together.”
As Spencer talked, you felt a strange mix of pride and awkwardness. Being at work with Spencer now that you were officially dating felt... different. You weren’t used to having your relationship on display for everyone, and it was obvious that the team was already tuned in to every detail.
J.J walked in, noticing Garcia's unusually happy mood. "What’s going on with you today, Garcia?"
Before Garcia could answer, Emily and Morgan jumped in. "Oh, you don’t know? Y/N and Reid are finally a couple," Emily said with a grin.
J.J’s eyes widened. "Wait, what? How did that happen?"
You overheard the conversation and turned toward them, about to say something when Garcia started recounting the story of how jealous you had gotten at the bar.
"It wasn’t like that—" you began, but Spencer, with a teasing grin, added fuel to the fire.
"You wouldn’t even let me speak to that girl when she asked if I was free!" he teased, nudging you lightly.
You groaned, rolling your eyes. "I told you I was sorry the other night," you muttered, feeling your face flush with embarrassment.
"Oh my God, you two are really a couple now!" J.J laughed.
“Who’s a couple?” Rossi’s voice suddenly chimed in as he entered the bullpen.
“Y/N and our pretty boy,” Morgan answered with a proud smile.
Rossi chuckled, nodding in approval. "Well, it’s about time! How did this happen?"
Spencer, now getting into it, started explaining the events at the bar to Rossi and J.J—how you got jealous when the blonde woman was flirting with him, how you interrupted, and how you eventually claimed him as "your man." The others listened with wide eyes and amused smiles.
“And then Y/N called Reid ‘her man,’” Morgan added, laughing. “From there, it was all over.”
You were starting to feel more and more self-conscious as they recounted the whole night. You tried to defend yourself, your voice growing softer. "It’s not like that... I just... I mean, it wasn’t planned or anything, it just happened."
Spencer, sensing your discomfort, gently took your hand again. "There’s no need to be shy," he said with that soft, reassuring tone that always put you at ease.
Emily smirked, raising an eyebrow. “I know, right? Now she gets so shy about it, but the other night she was ready to throw down at the bar!” The whole team burst into laughter, making you even more flustered.
Feeling like you needed a break from the teasing, you gently let go of Spencer’s hand. “I’m going to the conference room. We’ve got a case to focus on,” you said, retreating to the room where the briefing would take place.
As you left, Spencer continued filling J.J and Rossi in on the rest of your date, telling them how sweet and simple it was—just dinner and a movie, but it was perfect.
A few minutes later, you called out from the conference room, “Guys, Hotch wants us all in here.”
They all looked at you, still grinning and throwing teasing looks your way as they made their way to the room. Despite the light-hearted teasing, you couldn’t help but smile. Your relationship was out in the open now, and it felt good, even if it was a little overwhelming at first. But there was no time to dwell on that now—there was another case to solve, and the team quickly shifted into work mode as the briefing began.
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