#even tho she likes star wars

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Clone wars headcanons that took me forever to edit

I feel like my last couple of headcanons have been mushy so I’ve decided to write some shit Ahsoka and Anakin do that piss each other off 

Ahsoka bites the skin around her nails all the time and most of the time she won't stop till they’re bleeding 

Anakin’s tried literally everything in the book to get her to stop 

He tried putting spices on her hands forgetting that she likes spicy food, he’s tried painting her nails (like that’ll do anything) but she keeps picking the paint off, now he just uses the force to remove them from her mouth 

That’s gotten a few growls from her but at least it makes her aware she’s doing it but it doesn’t stop her from bitting them a couple of seconds later

Honestly he’s given up and just sits in silence while she complains about the pain

Anakin paces whenever he’s even slightly nervous and she can tell how nervous he is depending on how fast he moves 

If he’s just kinda anxious he moves pretty slow but if he’s like one shirt caught on a door handle away from a panic attack he’s teleporting 

When Padme told him he was gonna be a dad he was ecstatic for about 24 hours but after that some invisible timer went off in his head he booked it to Ahsoka’s house (she lives down the street cause of course she does)

Walked into her room and woke her poor sleepy butt up with all his pacing 

Girl swears to this day he broke the damn sound barrier with how fast he was moving 

She just wordlessly sat up and patted her bed cause she knew she wasn’t gonna get any sleep until he did 

She sat by him and listened as he rattled off all his worries and only really stepped in when the darker thoughts surfaced when it was all said and done she turned to him and said “Now let me kriffing sleep” 

Should he have probably left the room yeah but he got a total of 30 minutes of “sleep” that night so it’s not surprising that he knocked the fuck out of

Padme was a little bit alarmed to wake up without Anakin but was quickly soothed when she read Ahsoka’s message “Your nerf herders with me” 

She knew the pregnancy would dredge up some unhappy feelings and she also knew Anakin can’t think clearly if he doesn’t have Ahsoka to sort through the bullshit in his head 

She just got ready for brunch with her two favorite people and smiled cause she knew Obi-Wan and Rex would join them for dinner with or without an invitation 

When Anakin and Ahsoka were living together they would kick each other out of their own bathrooms 

Why? Well Ahsoka said Anakin’s had better lighting and water pressure and Anakin would do it to spite Ahsoka because he knew it would piss her off  

Slowly but surely their stuff gets moved into each other's bathrooms and it’s a weird amalgamation of crap 

Also when they were living together Anakin would ask Ahsoka if she was hungry before cooking and she’d often say no because she didn’t want to impose but his cooking always looked and smelled good 

So half the time girl would just end up eating some of his food when she thought he wasn’t looking 

At first he was like “Snips you said you weren’t hungry” to which she would respond “Yeah I wasn’t hungry then but I am now” after that he starts making more food on instinct cause damn that girl can eat 

Anakin gets back at her pretty easily tho by taking the first bite of her food whenever they go out to eat his excuse is that he’s “making sure it’s not poisoned” he never does this to Padme cause he respects her too damn much 

And he can’t use that trick on Obi-Wan and Rex cause the former taught him the trick and the latter has a bullshit detecter built-in 

Both Anakin and Ahsoka pull that trick on the twins tho (which gets them a quick scolding from Padme) 

Speaking of the twins it’s not surprising that as they grow up they realize that their auntie isn’t human so of course like any normal child they have questions and Anakin being the little shit that he is spots an opportunity for some laughs 

So he turns to the twins all serious-like and goes “Well my loves we actually found your auntie in a dumpster we have no idea where she came from” the twins are distraught and go to the nearest adult who just so happens to be their uncle Rex 

And Rex also being a little shit backs up Anakin’s story with so much sincerity that even Anakin believed it a little bit 

The twins being the angels they are apologize to their auntie for her terrible origin story with tears in their eyes and her reaction more than made up for the swift ass-kicking the boys got  

When Anakin was taller than Ahsoka he made her life hell by making fun of her every time something was even slightly out of her reach

He would make a big deal about grabbing it for her while commenting about how the temple’s architecture wasn’t made with the “young ones” in mind 

Obi-Wan has turned multiple blind eyes when Ahsoka socked the shit out of his arm when he tells one too many jokes some days

When she finally grows taller than him she makes the biggest deal about it and no one can blame her 

While Anakin is the pilot Ahsoka is easily the navigator she often jokes that Anakin wouldn’t find his way out of bed without help 

Which is funny cause he often acts like a herding dog with her putting his hand on her back or holding her arm to guide her 

But he’s wrong 9/10 times so it’s not uncommon to see Anakin guiding her in one direction and then see him get dragged in the opposite direction a couple of minutes later  

[moriaarts]

Captain Kiss of the 343rd

Blorbo of my own creation. Whom i love and adore. Who didn’t survive the war to let her assigned gender get in the way

Text under cut 💜

 AKA, Kisses (Duo), Capin' (The twins), Smooch (DT). The name Kiss comes from the kiss curls that frame her face. She styles these baby hairs, and paints curls on her bucket to match, along with teeth on her armour to resemble her beloved pet and service Massiff, Mooch. Captain of the 343 company on Naboo in the Lake Country.  Not to be confused with the sprawling fields and grand estates. This troop guard an outpost a few clicks from Auroa, a ranching village, as a look out for oncoming ground/swamp infiltration attempts. If the senators living it up in the Lake Country or the capital of Theed are under any threat, they'll know about it first, so its mostly surveillance and scouting work.

Kiss was originally designed to be a CC unit, but as a cadet crying too much saw her reconditioned and transplanted into a CT batch that had just lost a cadet in training. Crying is still difficult if not impossible for Kiss, who comes off as tough and aloof but feels things deeply. Kiss was deployed as heavy infantry to Geonosis in the first clone trooper assault, and took over as Captain of the company she was in when their Captain died. The role would remain hers for a time until she was struck down by a mortar shell that almost took her jaw. The wound would be cosmetic but the implant to replace the structure of her cheek and the horror of being unable to breathe or speak for so long would have lasting effects. But she's a good soldier, and despite the few and far between episodes, she is exemplary, but the danger of her doing so during battle is too much of an unknown that she is inevitably shipped to Naboo to aid the Naboo Royal Guard in protecting the mid-rim edge planet. A somewhat menial task for a would be perfect soldier. But it wouldn't be all bad. Mooch would be assigned to her as a pup.

Mooch was too docile to be an attack massiff but showed talent in being a service dog. When they met, the pup was able to detect an oncoming attack in Kiss and pawed at her until she complied with her demands.

Kiss would join two other clones in being the first clones to request transition. And seeing as her involvement in the war was considered to have little impact, two years in, she was approved. With her identity known to higher ranking clones. She would aid in the transfer and protection of other "Obsolete" or "faulty" clones. Some would stay with her and name themselves the 343 company in her honour.

Bonus: Nabooen locals worship a goddess called Hemeela. A goddess of bounty and beauty, known to take many forms but to be a brave fighter and mother. 

Upon discovering this deity, Kiss made her identity known to her vode and now lives as a woman adopting markings that match scars Hemeela received in her battle against the all-consuming Jutorus. 

She is in a constant debate with Duo about the nature of her weight. Hormones are new to her and have changed the distribution of fat much to her delight but to Duo's despair as they state "A fat ass isn't regulation." Much to Kiss’s despair. 

[padawansuggest]

Obi-Wan: *dragging Cody eagerly into the room while holding his hand* Guys, I have super important news! Cody and I are getting married!

Anakin: …oh? I mean… I guess it’s about time. I don’t know if I can bring the twins, will we have to get a babysitter for them?

Obi-Wan: Absolutely not, that’s free baby-holding hours and I’m not letting you cut them!

Cody: What do you mean it’s about time?

Rex: Well, the war’s been over nearly eight months. We just expected you two to tie the knot sooner.

Ahsoka: I mean, you already live together. The 212th kept your… dalliances quiet, through the war because they didn’t want the higher ups to break you guys up.

Anakin: Honestly, I’m a bit disappointed. I had money on you guys getting married no less than a week after the war.

Obi-Wan: Dalliances??

Rex: ??? Yeah?? You two aren’t very subtle, Cody didn’t even try sneaking out of your room after!

Obi-Wan: *looks at Cody in worry* Cody, why would you have to sneak out of our room? That’s where you sleep?

Cody: ??? I don’t know? The quartermaster said it was okay if we slept in the same room.

Obi-Wan: What’s wrong with Cody and I sharing a room?

Anakin: …remember when I was fourteen and you told me where babies come from?

Obi-Wan: …yes?

Anakin: ??? That????

Obi-Wan: …but we weren’t trying to make babies?

Cody: Do we even have the right parts to do that?

Obi-Wan: I think I have the carrier parts but I stopped checking if they worked a while back.

Anakin: WERE YOU TWO NOT HAVING SEX???

Obi-Wan: Oh gross!

Cody: 🤢

Rex: WHY WERE YOU TWO SLEEPING IN THE SAME ROOM????

Obi-Wan: BECAUSE WE COULDNT TRUST EACH OTHER NOT TO ACTUALLY SLEEP ON OUR OWN AND IT WAS NICER!

Ahsoka: Why are you two getting married now??

Obi-Wan: I don’t know TAX BENEFITS AND SHIT we’re in LOVE fuck off!

Cody: Oh gross you guys really just assume we naked touched???

Anakin: oh my god. What was your exact marriage idea composed of?? Tell me right this second!

Obi-Wan: um??? We said we wanted to be a family and raise some padawans together???

Anakin: *starts dragging Obi-Wan off to the bathroom* You’re taking a pregnancy test right this second, you chose the wrong wording! Every time someone I love is asexual or a top the force shoves a baby in them!

Obi-Wan: oh my god

[bonefall]

So, your Clear Sky post is absolutely horrifying, but it was very needed, so thank you. What are your general thoughts on tackling his abuse for the AU? Like you've said, pretending he's a good guy is not the way to go, but are you planning on toning down *some* of the situations, just to give some of the cats a break? Clear Sky is a very realistic depiction of abusers, but that seems to come across even without victim number 25, yknow? I'm very curious about how you'd like to go about this.

My most recent big change was bringing Slash back into the fold, because I realized that it was actually a disservice to not address where DOTC's themes dip into Colonialism. It's a hard topic, and I'm still trying to work out the details, but I realized it was important.

With how BB!DOTC is such a MASSIVE overhaul, to properly address abuse and the ways it impacts you, ableism and its violence, and xenophobia broadly, a huge reworking of Slash belonged here too. He's one of the greatest examples of how badly WC demonizes non-Clanborn cats. I shouldn't dance around it.

That's what I need to do with Skystar.

MANY of his victims have happier endings than canon, though. Bumble is one of the most famous, bumped up into a major character and directly responsible for the formation of ThunderClan. Bright Storm is taking most of Gray Wing's roles. Birch and Alder are getting examined, with either a father who wants his kids back or Milkweed as the mate of Misty.

A lot of people will die because of him, even more will be hurt, but I see BB!DOTC as a story about victims and survivors.

Others might grab POVs here and there, but as a response to canon which I feel is Clear Sky's story told in many parts, I center this rewrite around Thunder Storm. The path of kindness he marches down, with love and with anger, and the people he helps.

So BB!Star Flower...

Previously I was playing her as ENTIRELY just manipulating Clear Sky. She was loyal to One Eye and trying to get at Skystar to bleed him dry for 8 lives to sacrifice; but connected to Thunderstar over recognizing him as a victim who deserves her idea of justice. So, she offers Thunderstar the final kill, so her father will be grateful to him and he'll get power AND the death of his abuser.

(When Thunderstar looks upon Skystar, pathetic and neutralized down to one life, he thinks about the collateral damage that will descend upon the forest if he accepts the deal. He decides that he has found the line between Justice and Justification. Of course he wants the power to make his enemies cower, protect his people, and eliminate Clear Sky so he never threatens them again; that's not the problem.

He can still do these things. He wouldn't NEED the power of a war god to do so.

But if One Eye returns, he will be endlessly hungry, ruthlessly dedicated to revenge, and set out to devour the whole forest. Everything would get worse, and even more people he loves would die. It's where his desire to destroy a monster would lead to him BECOMING one.)

Even on its face, it was previously missing an element. There's a step between "Starf decides to bring One Eye back" and "Starf offers Thunderstar the final kill" that was bare. This is the piece that was missing-- That she, herself, is trying to reach out to the only person who's ever really understood her.

But more importantly... I do feel this topic belongs here, in BB!DOTC. Abuse is a MAJOR theme. SKYSTAR is a monster already. He's harmed two wives in BB (Bright Storm and Falling Cry) and played toxic games with all three kits (Thunder Storm, Pale Sky, Tiger Sky).

And I'd avoid Star Flower being abused... why? Because it's uncomfortable to confront the pattern that Clear Sky displays? That in-canon, he tries to cut all his victims into the same ideal shape, from Storm to Thunder to Star Flower? ...it should be uncomfortable. Everything that I described in Clear Sky Is A Monster is rooted in the same desire for control, power, and punishment most abusive people share, he just happens to be a severe example.

Yes. That includes how he treats his child and romantic partners. The parallels that are drawn between Starf and Thunder are there because he wants power in the form of obedience. Starf replaces the son as a narrative award for his "growth" of not killing random people anymore for a while.

A cookie cutter is an effective tool because IT ONLY MAKES ONE SHAPE.

You know what's more uncomfortable? Reading canon!DOTC and seeing someone who hurt you reflected almost perfectly in the character the writers think did nothing wrong. Because of "good intentions" that were not there.

I will say though, just to be clear; I don't see a purpose in being more than PG-13 about serious topics for this project. I promise none of my intentions have changed. Nothing will be more graphic or gorey than canon WC-- just more intentional.

I'm keeping the sacrifice because it's dope. No one is taking this from me. Girl Moment: Killed her awful husband 8 times to count as 8 sacrifices and offered the last life to her buddy as a show of good will. How else do you make friends outside of high school

But I know now that Star Flower NEEDS to keep the canon fact she has very little agency, UNTIL that moment she snaps.

She's sacrificing one abuser to try and bring back a bigger, badder one, because in spite of everything, her father One Eye always made her feel safe. Even though he promised her off to Skystar, and expected her to be willing to die for him. She's followed every command, every order, past the death of his mortal vessel.

The first, and only, selfish choice she's ever made was in reaching out to Thunderstar to offer him the power of her father.

Thunderstar's Justice is a story about a Thunder Storm at the pinnacle of his arc, how the survivors of his Clan are settling into the new normal after the carnage of The First Battle, how Skystar's arrogance brings a violent god to the Forest... and the connection Thunderstar makes with the daughter of a monster.

[inkstainedhandswithrings]

Jedi are only meant to use the Force for knowledge and defence, so while the clones have witnessed their Jedi doing some incredible things on the battlefield, they aren’t used to the way the Terrans use the Force.

Because to them it’s an extension of their body, a way of interacting with the world around them. It’s integrated into their day to day life, and more so than just meditation.

So the clones will be in the mess hall, in line to get their food and suddenly a tray will just float past them as a Terran from across the room is loading it up with food and then bringing over to their table.

Someone will sneeze and suddenly a tissue just floats over to them and they don’t even know where it came from.

Clones will be busy loading up a ship with supplies when the Terrans walk in and see the Jedi just sort of standing there?? So they exchange confused looks but just kind of shrug and lift the very heavy crate the two troopers are carrying with the Force and then just go on to load up the rest of the ship. They see this behaviour from the Jedi a couple more times and don’t really get it, like they think the Jedi are just kinda,,, dumb? Like guys you CAN use the Force for this, the boys don’t gotta be lugging all this shit around? So they just do it instead, every time they have to prepare for a mission a couple of Terran officers show up and just load everything up and when the clones go “thank you so much, sir! :D” they are like “it took two minutes and we didn’t even break a sweat?”

And the Terrans stay as confused about the Jedi’s use of the Force as the Clones are about theirs, like damn, you can really just do ANYTHING, huh?

The Jedi don’t really know what to do with all this, because to them it’s incredibly disrespectful to use the Force so liberally, but now their clones are walking up to them every now and again like “sir could you fetch that thing that’s on the really high up shelf?” (item is very big and heavy), “excuse me sir but Boil made friends with another group of kids and they said their tooka is stuck in a tree.” (tree is about 15 meters high), “Could you pass that medkit over there, sir?” (medkit is on the other side of the hangar)

And they don’t wanna be rude and shoot their men down, but they can’t just go using the Force for all this random shit, like that’s not what it’s FOR?? so now Jedi are climbing shelves and trees and running across hangars all the goddamn time and the Terrans are just like,,,

“WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU????”

“WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU????”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHATS WRONG WITH US, YOU’RE THE ONES PUTTING UP TENTS WITH YOUR BARE FUCKING HANDS??? IT TAKES LIKE TWENTY MINUTES LONGER!!! LIKE, MY GUY, WE WANNA GET SOME SLEEP???”

bonus: Nevaeh has a thing about holding things (she hates it) so whenever she needs to hold her space phone, space wallet, lip balm, cigarette and coffee they just kinda float behind her because she can’t be fucked.

Obi-Wan said she’s a bad influence on Ahsoka (he’s right) (soka also can’t be fucked)

@phantom-of-the-501st @saturn-sends-hugs

[qu4kerider]

“You've changed.”

ARCANE S02E03 & STAR WARS: EPISODE III - REVENGE OF THE SITH

[vaguely-concerned]

do you think arranging the little veilguard tableaus of npcs standing around together was fun. I think it would be fun. I would make up soooo many dumb intricate little stories for all of them while I was placing them around the map and no one playing the game would ever know about it. but I'd know. I'd know their stories

[azurecanary]

Fans when Luke, who knew nothing of his father, insists that there's good in him and desperately tries to save and redeem him: "That's my boy, this is what Star Wars is supposed to be!"

Fans when Ahsoka, who was intimately familiar with both sides of Anakin, holds Anakin accountable for his deeds as Vader after trying to kill him because of it but later accepts that he was at different points both good and bad: "GeNoCidE eNabLeR!!!!"

[engagemythrusters]

clone wars was fr like “No you lemur aliens CANNOT be pacifist. Don’t you know staunch pacifism is bad and will not keep you and your loved ones safe?!” but then the moment a blonde girl shows up the message was “oh wow well that’s different! So interesting! We will have rational conversations about your perspective and why you can have it!” despite the fact that it was at the detriment of the Mandalorian culture.

[hoapes]

all of the bad stuff about the acolyte is starting to pile up idk the hot ppl and the action scenes and the interesting ideas aren't enough for me

[jonquilandlace]

anyway im sure this take has been made before but Sabine Wren is literally the perfect definition of a multiclass

[du-hjarta-skulblaka]

Stuck on the first few eps of Farscape after finishing up Fantasy High s2 and maybe its the whole most recently consumed bias but I'm really struck by how much it feels like a dnd game??? Bunch of weird lil renegades slapped together and put in weird situations, honestly it would make a really interesting starting point for a game

Anyway John Crichton is a bard/wizard; he does a lot of persuasion as performance and that scene of him collapsing to the floor to write slingshot equations is THE most wizard shit- perhaps Artificer would be more accurate to him but it's not a class I'm familiar with.

[lieutenantselnia]

I feel like I've been really losing track of time because university has been demanding, also it's been getting cold and dark where I live and it hasn't exactly lightened my overall mood (if I could I'd gladly just go into hibernation until temperatures go over, say like 15°C again). But tomorrow I'll attend Vienna Comic Con and I'm actually feeling more exited (and less anxious) than I had hoped for! I'm still a bit nervous because of course there will be many people and I'm not that good with social situations, but I still hope it will be fun💕

[lesbianwyllravengard]

Guys what do I do when my baby brother wants to be just like me. Besides weep and sob and explode of course

[jewishcissiekj]

Thinking about how Asajj should adopt Merrin (Jedi: video game series). Or Deathstick (Star Wars: Uprising, Disney/current SW Comics). both work tbh. Unrelated, here's her being feral in Halcyon Legacy

Star Wars - The Halcyon Legacy #1 | Star Wars - The Halcyon Legacy #3

+Bonus Banshee from #3 (because it's stunning here I just can't explain it)

[sammys-magical-au]

WILDFLOWER (Billie Eilish) is about Lionel’s guilt over encouraging Ahsoka to leave the Order after my au’s version of The Wrong Jedi arc

(See also: “she was crying on my shoulder, all I could do was hold her”)