#even if it might change in the future or something

[crowsofdarkness]

After weeks of arguing, you thought your relationship with Bucky was near the end. That was until you held something positive in your hand.

18+ CW's below the cut(angst, language, unprotected pinv in Bucky's computer chair, Bucky having a sudden breeding kink)

The door slamming in the small confines of my apartment echoed causing me to jump, doing whatever I could to keep the tears at bay. I wouldn't cry, not for him. Not for Bucky.  Even though the moment he walked in the door, all I wanted to do was cry not only because of the constant arguing but because I missed him terribly. He was here physically but emotionally, Bucky was checked out. 

"Asshole," I grumbled under my breath, eyes boring daggers into the closed door of his office/studio. 

It had been weeks of non stop fighting yet barely speaking to each other. He’d been gone on missions constantly so he could avoid being home. When I needed him the most, he was gone. 

Ignoring the thoughts plaguing my existence lately, I blew out a shaky breath and forced myself to turn back towards the kitchen counter.  The exhaustion had been buried deep in my bones for the last couple of weeks and I didn’t think it had anything to do with working almost every day. All I wanted to do was curl in bed to sleep the rest of the evening away. Even though Bucky's words from our fight this morning before I left for work kept pestering me. 

"I haven't thought much about the future. I'm trying to focus on getting myself better, mentally, before having kids." 

I asked him in the middle of yet another argument where he thought this relationship was going because I made the mistake of mentioning how I felt like things were stale between us. Bucky didn't think of the future. Of our future. He only thought of the now. 

It had been weeks of arguing. Weeks of walking on eggshells around each other. Weeks of not having sex. And weeks of keeping a secret to myself. Now that I knew how Bucky felt, I couldn't decide on if I should continue to keep it to myself or tell him which could potentially ruin everything. 

The urge to cry burned in my throat as I snatched the bag off of the kitchen counter and locked myself in the bathroom. I stared at my reflection in the mirror for a long moment, noting the dark circles under my eyes. 

Averting my gaze away from the mirror, I dug out the box from the bag and nearly choked on a breath when I read over the letters once more. I nearly dropped it in the pharmacy when the realization began to sink in. 

Pregnancy Test. 

I had missed my period last month and it was coming up on when I was supposed to get it this month but with how I’d been feeling, I knew I wouldn’t be getting my period this month either. 

That night was a night where we had a huge blowout argument, both of us questioning if we loved another. Deep down we knew we still loved each other and it was wrong for us to question it. But both of us were stubborn so instead of admitting our love, we decided to fuck out our frustrations; Bucky dragging me to the shower with him as I wrapped my legs around his midsection, marking his neck as mine while his cock slammed into me. Afterwards, Bucky helped me to our bed and apologized for the fight as he held me against his chest. I took the morning after pill later that afternoon once we realized we weren’t safe which is why I was hoping the test would be negative. Maybe the reason why I missed my period was because of all the stress I’d been under. 

“Might as well get this over with,” I grumbled under my breath while ripping open the box. 

It came with two tests and I figured it would be better if I used both so after peeing on both sticks, I set them on the counter and washed my hands. These next five minutes were going to be incredibly slow so after I changed into one of Bucky’s shirts and opted out of wearing pants, I paced the bathroom.

“Shit,” I clutched my chest when the timer on my phone went off. 

As I reached for the tests which were overturned, I paused for a moment wondering if maybe I should have been doing this with Bucky. 

“If he wasn’t such an asshole,” I muttered to the thought in my head and turned over the two tests. 

My heart was in my ears, in my throat, and in the depths of my stomach when I saw the one word that sealed our fate. 

Positive. 

Both tests were positive. 

“Fuck me,” I breathed while resting a hand on my stomach, the tears finally falling. 

There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that even though we were fighting, Bucky would be fine with whatever I decided to do. It was my choice. But would he stay with me? The Avengers seemed to be all over the world, helping people who needed it, hence why Bucky had been in a mood lately. I knew his anger wasn't directly related to me but because he’d been overworked. I also knew that didn’t give him the right to take it out on me. 

Pulling up Bucky’s text thread on my phone, shaking fingers worked out a text even though he was still in the next room. 

Me: I need to talk to you. It’s important. Can you meet me in the living room please? 

Bucky 🩶: Not right now. 

With a snarl, I snatched the tests off the bathroom counter and stormed out into his office, letting the door smack against the wall. Bucky didn’t bother to look away from the book on his lap as he sat on his computer chair. 

“Congratulations. You’re going to be a father,” I snapped before turning to walk away. 

The chair creaked as Bucky leaned forward to gaze down at his desk, a soft breath catching in his throat. 

“Doll,” his vibranium fingers grazed my wrist, halting me. “Wait.” 

“What? Are you going to claim I’m faking this?” I snapped, slicing him with my gaze. 

“I-,” Bucky’s face softened as he looked back at the pregnancy tests. “You’re pregnant?” 

I let the anger fade momentarily when I heard the sincerity in his voice; the slight excitement. 

“Yeah, I guess so. I missed my period last month and I’ve been so exhausted lately. Not to mention my boobs have been really sore,” I cringed while running a hand over my chest. 

Bucky glanced up at my breasts with a small smirk but then he let his gaze lower on my stomach where it rested for a long few beats of silence. Fear of what he would do or say weighed heavy on my shoulders causing me to remain frozen in front of him. The air in the room was thick with an unreadable tension and the ringing in my ears was deafening. I couldn’t even hear our shared breathing as Bucky continued to stare at my stomach before his large hands rested there.

“Hi,” he breathed. “I’m your dad.”

I dragged a finger over his cheek, those ocean eyes I adored so much gazed up at me. “I’m sorry.” 

“For what, doll?” Bucky asked with furrowed brows. 

“For everything. For avoiding fixing things between us by working non stop.”

I rattled off which made him link fingers with me and brought me down onto his lap, both of us now sitting in his computer chair. He rested his hands over my hip, slowly raising up the hem of my shirt so he could drag calloused fingers over my skin. It was the most contact we’ve had in a week and I leaned farther into him. His nose dragged over my jaw, breathing me in. 

“I’m sorry for all of the hurtful things I’ve said. I’m sorry for ignoring your feelings when I should have asked you up front what was wrong. I’m sorry for locking myself away with work instead of fixing things between us,” Bucky apologized. 

I looked deeper into his eyes, taking in the slight freckles on his face. “Can I be honest?” 

When Bucky nodded, I continued. “You freaked me out when you said you never thought of our future and now that I’m pregnant, I’m worried you’re going to leave.” 

“Absolutely not,” he cupped my cheek, dragging his thumb just underneath my eye to wipe away the stray tears. “I’ve never thought about the future until you came into my life, doll. I might not express it enough, which is my fault but please know you’re in my future. Especially now.” 

His free hand grazed over my stomach and I nodded into the grasp on my cheek, leaving a kiss on the inside of his palm. 

“Can you promise me one thing?” I asked. 

“Anything.” 

Biting my lip, I spoke. “Can you promise not to propose to me just because I’m pregnant? I want you to propose because you want to, not because you feel like you have too.”

Something flashed in his eyes but Bucky eventually nodded. “Of course.”

While sitting on his lap, the chair continued to creak underneath our shared weight and I sighed, ready to get off which caused him to tighten his grip on me. 

“Stay,” he breathed in the crook of my neck. “I need to show you how sorry I am.” 

Quickly, Bucky’s lips were on mine in a leisurely kiss. It started off like how our first kiss did, like he was testing the waters again. I nearly sobbed into the kiss when I felt the love pour out of him. I’d been desperate to feel this way again. With his hands on my hips, he began moving me up and down his lap, the hardness of his cock pressing against the thin material of my panties. His name fell from my lips, almost immediately swallowed by his tongue as it explored my mouth; tasting me. 

Vibranium fingers slinked up my shirt to graze over my back before Bucky tossed it over my head and down to the floor, breaking our kiss. Lust bleed in his already dark eyes as he looked at my stomach, his cock straining in his jeans. 

“Shit,” he groaned while pressing kisses along my chest. “I can’t wait to see you round with my baby.” 

A moan fell from my lips as I exposed more of myself to Bucky, his teeth now grazing over my nipples. Along with my sore breasts, my nipples were extra sensitive. 

“Bucky,” I pulled on his shirt. 

He immediately understood and helped me work it off. Immediately my nails raked along his chest as my lips met his again in a fiery kiss, this one more intense than the last. With a gentle tap to my ass, I raised my hips slightly so Bucky could drag down my panties with a bit of maneuvering. However with his jeans, it would have taken way more manuerving on his part to slide them off completely. 

“We should move to the bed,” I suggested, breathless. 

Bucky shook his head, keeping his lips on the current mark he was working on my neck. “Absolutely not. I want you to sit on my cock while I sit on the chair.” 

Feeling feisty, I pulled away from him slightly to gaze down at him. “Really? This has nothing to do with Steve making it slip the other day how he and his girlfriend did something eerily similar to this.” 

He rolled his eyes with a groan. “Please don’t bring up Steve having sex right now.” 

When he motioned towards his unzipped jeans, I let out a soft giggle and then reached my hand in his briefs to grab his cock, already so warm and hard. 

“I’ve missed this,” I whispered, gathering his precum to drag it over his head. 

“Doll,” my name came out through gritted teeth as Bucky rested his head on my shoulder. “I need to be inside of you. Please.”

Pulling his cock out from his briefs completely, I dragged it between my folds a few strokes before sinking down on him; both of us letting out a loud groan of pleasure.  It had been so long since we’ve felt this so I knew we wouldn’t last long. 

“Fuck,” Bucky strangled out while wrapping his arms around me to bring me closer. “I can’t wait to watch your belly get round with my baby.”

I mewled in response, mouth busy with leaving dark marks across his neck while one of my hands slipped between our bodies to press circles on my clit, bringing me closer to the edge. 

His cock twitched inside of me, indicating he was close when his hips stilled. “You'd look so beautiful pregnant with my kid. Your belly and tits-oh shit." 

“Don’t stop,” I begged while riding him faster this time, the chair nearly falling over. 

“Doll,” Bucky’s voice was strained so I brushed away the hair from his sweat slicked forehead. “I’m going to fill you up over and over again.” 

I nodded as the coil in my stomach began to ignite in a blaze of ecstasy, my orgasm about to snap. 

“I love you,” I cried out when my body finally snapped, arousal coating Bucky’s cock. 

With one final thrust, he followed me over the edge as he filled me with his cum and breathlessly announced his love for me as well. Falling into him with exhaustion, Bucky lifted me from the chair and carried me through our apartment towards the bathroom. 

“Are you alright?” He questioned while still carrying me. 

I pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m okay.”

Setting me on the closed toilet seat, he turned on the shower and removed his pants while we waited for the steam to bellow around us. 

[majikkulu]

✮ ˖° ⸜ masterlist ꕤ ･

╭₊˚๑  ૮꒰˶˃  ᵕ  ˂˶꒱ა  ♡ in  this  pick-a-card  reading,  we’ll  explore  your  first  kiss  with  your  future  spouse. how  it  will  look,  feel,  and  unfold.

remember,  this  is  a  general  reading,  so  take  what  resonates  and  let  the  rest  go.

trust  your  intuition,  choose  the  picture  or  pile  that  calls  to  you,  and  let  the  magic  unfold!

✧˖°.₊  ♡  ✩˚  ༘

﹒ ﹢ ♡. PILE ONE ﹑ ﹒ the  moment  your  lips  finally  meet,  it  won’t  just  be  a  kiss.  it  will  be  a  realization.  a  wake-up  call.  this  kiss  won’t  happen  randomly;  it  will  come  after  a  moment  of  deep  reflection,  after  both  of  you  have  finally  acknowledged  what  has  been  simmering  beneath  the  surface.  it  will  be  confirmation  of  something  undeniable,  something  inevitable.  the  intensity  will  hit  like  a  tidal  wave.  fated,  electrifying,  almost  life-changing.  there  will  be  no  hesitation,  no  second-guessing.  the  chemistry  will  be  magnetic,  impossible  to  ignore.  this  kiss  might  happen  in  public,  bold  and  unafraid,  with  your  future  spouse  taking  charge,  unable  to  resist  any  longer.  maybe  it  follows  a  long  period  of  teasing,  flirting,  pushing,  pulling.  until  they  surrender  and  just  do  it.  it  will  be  passionate.  raw.  urgent.  an  explosion  of  pent-up  tension,  finally  released.  it  might  even  carry  a  competitive  energy,  as  if  both  of  you  are  trying  to  prove  something.  to  win,  to  dominate,  to  claim  each  other  in  the  moment.  maybe  it  happens  after  a  heated  argument,  starting  off  intense,  rough,  almost  aggressive,  before  softening  into  something  that  takes  your  breath  away.  it  won’t  be  a  neat,  practiced  kiss.  it  will  be  messy,  deep,  desperate,  like  your  mouths  were  made  for  each  other.  tongues  intertwining,  warmth  spreading,  a  kiss  that  lingers  and  leaves  you  dizzy.  and  when  you  finally  pull  away,  both  of  you  will  know:  nothing  will  ever  be  the  same  again.

﹒ ﹢ ♡. PILE TWO ﹑ ﹒ your  first  kiss  will  be  quiet,  steady,  and  grounding,  like  sinking  into  a  warm  embrace  after  a  long  storm.  it  will  feel  like  home.  like  relief.  the  moment  will  be  wrapped  in  peace.  perhaps  after  a  long  day,  or  after  transitioning  from  chaos  into  stillness.  there  is  no  rush  here,  no  urgency,  just  two  souls  finding  solace  in  each  other.  it’s  the  kind  of  kiss  that  happens  in  a  dimly  lit  room,  by  a  crackling  fireplace,  wrapped  in  warmth,  with  the  world  fading  away.  a  moment  so  intimate,  so  personal,  it  feels  sacred.  this  kiss  is  healing.  both  of  you  will  need  it.  no  words  necessary.  no  hesitation.  just  a  slow,  natural  pull  toward  each  other,  like  gravity  itself  is  drawing  you  in.  it  will  be  gentle,  unhurried,  perfectly  synchronized,  the  kind  of  kiss  where  time  slows  down,  where  you  melt  into  each  other  effortlessly.  but  beneath  that  softness,  there’s  something  deeper.  an  emotional  release,  like  walls  crumbling,  like  old  wounds  finally  finding  closure.  one  of  you  might  be  carrying  past  hurt,  trying  to  protect  your  heart,  but  this  kiss…  this  kiss  will  break  through  it  all.  it  will  be  overwhelming  in  the  most  beautiful  way.  your  breath  will  catch,  your  skin  will  tingle,  maybe  even  goosebumps.  and  when  you  pull  away,  you’ll  both  be  shaking,  stunned,  forever  changed.

﹒ ﹢ ♡. PILE THREE ﹑ ﹒ your  first  kiss  will  be  hesitant,  calculated.  like  a  chess  move,  like  a  silent  confession.  there  will  be  overthinking,  tension  thick  in  the  air.  maybe  you’ll  both  try  to  resist  it,  maintaining  composure,  pretending  this  moment  isn’t  inevitable.  but  then,  sharp  eye  contact.  a  knowing  glance.  and  suddenly,  everything  else  disappears.  the  kiss  won’t  be  rushed  or  chaotic;  it  will  be  intentional.  every  touch,  every  movement,  carefully  placed,  as  if  both  of  you  have  been  waiting  for  the  perfect  moment.  i  see  slow  smiles  against  lips,  a  sense  of  satisfaction,  as  if  you  both  knew  this  would  happen  all  along.  maybe  it  follows  a  victory,  a  celebration,  a  moment  of  triumph.  maybe  one  of  you  hesitates  at  first,  nervous,  avoiding  eye  contact.  but  the  second  your  lips  meet,  all  uncertainty  vanishes.  the  kiss  will  feel  like  stepping  into  a  movie  scene.  intense,  cinematic,  something  meant  to  be  remembered.  it  will  start  slow,  soft,  thoughtful…  and  then  suddenly,  as  emotions  take  over,  it  will  transform  into  something  bold,  fiery,  intoxicating.  you’ll  feel  it  in  your  bones,  in  your  soul.

﹒ ﹢ ♡. PILE FOUR ﹑ ﹒ your  first  kiss  will  be  an  undeniable  claim,  a  declaration.  no  hesitation,  no  second-guessing.  your  future  spouse.  or  someone  with  strong,  masculine  energy.  will  take  charge.  they’ll  kiss  you  like  they  know  they  want  you,  like  there’s  no  question  about  it.  this  kiss  is  controlled,  confident,  and  full  of  intensity.  it  will  be  the  kind  of  kiss  that  stops  time,  that  makes  your  heart  pound  in  your  chest.  there  will  be  deep  eye  contact  beforehand,  a  silent  conversation  passing  between  you  both,  heavy  with  meaning.  the  kiss  will  be  sudden,  hot,  and  maybe  even  reckless.  done  without  thinking,  just  feeling.  expect  hands  pulling,  bodies  pressing  closer,  unspoken  desire  finally  unleashed.  it  won’t  be  soft  and  uncertain;  it  will  be  full  of  energy,  passion,  and  raw  need.  and  yet,  underneath  all  the  heat,  there’s  something  deeper.  something  serious.  devotion.  commitment.  the  kiss  will  carry  weight,  as  if  it  holds  every  unspoken  promise  between  you.  it  might  even  happen  in  a  traditional  or  formal  setting,  where  it  shouldn’t  happen,  but  the  tension  is  too  much  to  ignore.  it  will  be  overwhelming.  sensual.  the  chemistry  undeniable.  maybe  you’ll  try  to  resist,  but  resistance  is  futile.  the  moment  will  consume  you,  leaving  you  breathless,  trembling,  and  completely  undone.

[reborn-readings]

What does your heart need from you at this moment?

Tip Jar | Masterlist | Personal Readings

Hello hello! Back with a new Pick a Pile, the third one in my 'needs from you' series. Let's see what messages your heart has for you 💚

This is a group reading, so take what resonates and leave the rest. Don't force anything if it does not fit. Remember that the future is not set in stone and that other potential paths exist depending on your movement through the course of time.

Pile 1 (Left)

Rx Queen of Cups | Four of Swords | Inner Wisdom – Odin | Three of Swords | Seven of Summer | Lapis Lazuli – Expression | Mercy | Enlightenment – Moving Forward

Immediately the Rx Queen of Cups suggests a loss of control over emotion, or maybe a lack of emotion. This is also a rather sword-focused reading. Cups govern our heat, but swords can guide it. The four suits of Tarot are not separate—they intertwine and work together to improve out lives.

In order to get back to a place of evenness, you must allow these elements to work together. It sounds contradictory, but in order to help your heart heal, it asks you to follow your mind for now. It especially wants to emphasize that recognizing and feeling grief is important for your health and that rest is necessary—not only that, but the requirement of rest is a gift to humanity.

Allowing your mind to accept new knowledge and to expand will give you the tools you need to follow your heart. The world right now seems like a lot, what with spring coming (in a physical or metaphorical sense) and all these new, budding options available to you. For now, let logic guide you with the faith that your heart will return to you when it’s ready to help guide you.

In your relations with others, you walk a tightrope between honesty and compassion. Though you seem to be the kind of person whose kind words are not competing with your honest words. Continue your march of kindness and others will soon recognize you and show their bright colors in return.

Contrary to popular believe, protection lies not in the past or what is stable and unchanging, but in the future and in your ability to move on from past events. Each step forward is another bit of strengthening for your ward.

Other messages – Kindness to all living things (and maybe even some nonliving). What goes around comes around. Your true expressions are needed. Making a decision and moving on (it’s not as big of a decision as you might think—will it matter in a year?). Solitude/pulling back to gain wisdom.

Symbols – A matte feeling on your fingers and thumb. The color blue, like a snowy winter sky. Gold thread.

Pile 2 (Middle)

The Chariot | Eight of Swords | The Magician – Creator Gods | Queen of Swords | Four of Winter | Topaz – Manifestation | Change | Independence – Carving Your Own Path

Pile 2, have you ever seen a cicada coming out of its shell? That’s the image that I get of you right now. They spend the first seventeen years of their lives in bodies that aren’t theirs, only to climb up from the ground, anchor themselves to a tree, and split open on the back, emerging for a few months of whirlwind love.

This is an intense reading for me. It’s like you’re shock still now, but about to break forth and go tearing across the world to find your home. My heart is pounding just thinking about it! I suppose your heart just wants to warn you about the upcoming flurry of activity?

Yes, all your bindings will drop around you and you will create something magnificent. You will learn easy, rest easy, manifest what you desire, and transform into the new you. My throat got a bit tight when that message came to me—if this is something that you fear, know that your heart, your core, will stay the same. You’ll still be you! Only a more competent, independent, creative, merciful, confident, masterful you! When you’re through the transformation, it will feel as if it happened in the blink of an eye, and your heart will swell and feel warm with recognition of your accomplishments.

Other messages – Embrace the light of a new day. Confidence and belief. Make sure you get enough sleep. Heat and words as tools of creation. Energy.

Symbols – As I mentioned, insects coming out of pupae/cocoons. Races. The colors blue and yellow. The number 7. Soft/textured fabric.

Pile 3 (Right)

Rx King of Pentacles | Ace of Swords | Master of Wands – Giacomo Casanova | Ace of Cups | Ego | Rutilated Quartz – Confidence | Nature | The General of Knowledge

I get a distinct feeling of loss from you, Pile 3. Not something tangible or concrete that has been lost, but the loss of a certain feeling or thrill. The loss of passion. First, please know that these feelings, or lack thereof, are only temporary. Second, your heart has some messages for you to help you haul yourself out from this place.

Firstly. Several of the cards are pointing toward too much of an emphasis on the material. I see this manifesting as a sort of fear—fear of losing what you already have, fear of not being able to get what your body needs, fear of not being good enough to earn your keep, as they say. The counter to this fear is to invest in areas of life that develop you as a person. Be grateful for the opportunities that come your way, recognize your feelings and that each new relationship could be the start of something grand, maybe take up a new topic of interest to study or contemplate. Go for a nature walk and see what the world has to offer! I see you getting your hands dirty—maybe you’d like gardening, or something similar?

Secondly, a lot of the cards are pointing toward confidence. It feels like everyone can see how much swagger you have except you. But a lack of confidence is a self-fulfilling prophecy, and if you don’t believe in yourself, who will?

There is so much in this world waiting for you to dig it up. Hold onto hope, please, and remember to take life one day at a time.

Other messages – None. Listen to your heart, take note of how it feels. I sense that a higher power wants to bring you the rest of your messages, if you don’t already feel like you understand what comes next.

Symbols – Globe. Droplets of water. Overgrown plants.

If this was helpful, please consider donating or expanding on your personal messages in a reading💚

Dividers by @/saradika-graphics

[worrywrite]

As I was watching I had that same thought. Is this satire? Is this a subversion if the magical girl genre? And ultimately, based on what I saw, I'd say no. It's not.

Your show is a magical girl show. It's an American magical girl show. It's a comedy magical girl show. And it's a magical girl show where the premise is that the protagonist is a reluctant one. The underlying tragic narrative inherent to the magical girl genre (generally one of fighting a future that was hosen for you) is still here. It is a magical girl show. And the changes are refreshing for American animated media. It's playing with a lot of well known tropes of the genre; it nods directly to sailor moon, it expects the viewer to at least know what a magical girl story is like. And it might subvert some tropes (like using a lead pipe to break the villains kneecaps, and even then there are slapstick fights in anime with similar connotations), but it doesn't escape the genre. At most, I'd say it's tongue in cheek about what it is.

I'd enjoy seeing more, if only so I could see how right or wrong my view of it is. I don't think something has to be new or subversive or groundbreaking to be worth making. If that were true, the MCU wouldn't still be going.

it is a bit…. weird to me? that most of the comments ive seen on more critical reviews are “magical girl deconstructions have been done before” as if that in itself is a criticism. its like saying superhero shows cant exist because everything you can do with a superhero has been done.

really enjoyed the pilot and im always happy to see more magical girl content out there.

I knew some people would be turned off for this reason going into making the project hahaha. I know people have been calling it a "subversion", "deconstruction" or "parody" which it kinda is LOL but not by too much? or at least I don't intend it to be if I make more.

Magical girls and superheroes not wanting to do their jobs is definitely nothing new! I'm just making it the leading theme and thesis of the show~

But yeah I don't believe in the "it's been done before" thing being a reason something shouldn't be made. People bring so many different POVs to the same concepts and it's the EXECUTION that makes it original or different

[jeminie-rising]

onigiris for valentine's

[ Inumaki Toge x Reader ]

link to AO3: [ onigiris for valentine's by JEMINIE ]

summary: "Perhaps he didn’t get a bag with a purple ribbon, but he looked at his own colour on the ribbon that was tied on your hair."

Or, it's valentine's day and you give everyone a bag of cookies with ribbons of their favourite colours apart from Inumaki. He then realises that his ribbon was actually in your hair all along.

warnings: Inumaki Toge uses sign language, Soft Inumaki, Inumaki says more than just rice balls ingredients, fluff, toge and reader being complete idiots in love, no smut!, they're both so in love, Not actually unrequited love (they just shy), Yuuta is so supportive, love confessions (finally), slow burn

characters: inumaki toge, The Inumaki Clan, Fushiguro Megumi, Itadori Yuuji, Kugisaki Nobara, Zen'in Maki, Panda, Yuta Okkotsu

word count: 6,623

authors note: hi, i know i know. It's the end of February and why am i posting a Valentine's themed one shot?

WELL BETTER LATE THAN NEVER!

sorry, i wasn't in the mood to write about love during the month of my ex's birthday lmao. so not only was i late, but this one shot might not be as good as i would have hoped. I shall come back in the future to fix it, hopefully

In the meantime though, ENJOY xx

and reminder:

sign language in this fanfic, like in all the others, is based on japanese sign language, not ASL.

this is part 3 of the Holidays with Toge series but can 100% be read on its own

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Don’t wait for someday. She’s thinking the same thing as you. - kids that fly

It has been weeks since New Year’s Eve. January seemed to pass in the blink of an eye and even worse, it seems like nothing really has changed. Not the classes they took, not the amount of times Itadori begged for you to help him out with English, not the missions you took up with your classmates, and not the way Inumaki treated you.

You started to believe everything that has happened was a figment of your imagination. His little trick and tease during the countdown to the very last second of last year, was nothing more than his way to pull a joke out of you. It’s not that it was something out of the ordinary. He liked to pull pranks on people with Panda all the time. Something Maki had to deal with every day, being the only other classmate they had that was present. Unfortunately for her, the mysterious fourth second year was always absent, making her the only and biggest target of Inumaki and Panda’s annoying plans.

But exactly because of it, they moved on from Maki and started widening their target to the first years. They started with Itadori, quite the gullible one and easier to get forgiveness from. A safe bet, you’d say. They managed to make him believe he was invisible for an entire afternoon. Even miraculously got help from Megumi, who did not want to get involved. But because it came natural for him to ignore Itadori, he indirectly added to the two’s bit.

They managed to pull one on you too. But in comparison, your prank seemed quite mellower. One day, mid-january, you came back to your room after class only to see it filled up with Christmas decorations when you were sure you put them down just the previous week. Even then, you were certain that you never really owned Santa curtains and elves bedsheets. It took you a whole two days to bring down everything.

Up to this day, you weren’t sure how it was that they entered your room. 

“I can hear you both snickering there,” Maki warned the two solidified prankers of the school, “if this is one other prank you’re planning you will–”

“It’s not!” Panda was quick to defend himself, “Toge was just making a joke.”

“If you two have so much time to joke around then might as well use that to train the first years.”

You and Nobara couldn’t help but smile at that idea. Training with a second year other than Maki? Definitely! 

Maki was a force of nature. She may not have any cursed energy but she made up for it with raw skills and talent. Nobara swore she would take ten Pandas over one Maki any day. And that she did. Maki wasn’t even done sparring with her before she ran towards Panda to start their training. You only looked at her, a little bit of betrayal in your face for leaving you behind.

Maki looked at you expectantly, now that Nobara was gone, you were next.

“I, actually–”

“Hey, guys!”

Everyone turned around but only the second years reacted to the newcomer. 

“Who is that?” Itadori asked, almost appalled, as soon as he saw Maki actually smile.

Megumi, who was the only one from the first years who has been in the school long enough to know, smiled proudly as he answered Itadori, “That’s Yuuta Okkotsu, the last of the second years of the Tokyo Metropolitan Curse Te–”

“Yeah, yeah,” Nobara interrupted him. “That’s the last of our upperclassmen then?”

“I guess...?”

With a groan Nobara let down her shoulders, “ugh, so there’s really no handsome guy in this entire school uh?”

“Hey!” Itadori pouted, but Nobara was already waving her hand, shooing him away.

“I think he’s kinda cute,” you admitted.

“Yeah, in a sick Victorian kid way,” Nobara was looking at Okkotsu from the midfield with the rest of her classmates. He was quite far from them, but she could already observe him without problems from where she stood. “He looks like he’s ready to go at any time, are we really sure he’s a special grade?” 

Megumi scoffed at her question. There was little to underestimate about Yuuta Okkotsu, and his grade was not one of them.

“Hey guys come here!” Panda waved for the first years, “let me introduce you to Yuuta Okkotsu, our classmate and friend.”

Everyone gave a small nod, all with their own reasons as to not make the first step, but overall, the cursed energy he emanated from that distance was enough to keep them away.

“Don’t worry, he’s not gonna bite,” Panda reassured them.

“Not him anyways,” Maki added, making Inumaki chuckle.

“Hello, I’m Yuji Itadori!” The pink haired boy was the first to introduce himself, you couldn’t help but wonder if he trusted Panda enough to do it or he really was just that kind of guy to not care about his own safety. The times you went on missions with him made you think it was the latter.

“Nobara Kugisaki,” she simply said, studying him with her gaze. She only let a beat pass before she added, “You’re really a special grade sorcerer?”

Yuuta could only smile at her, and with the most casual tone he answered her, “uh, yeah, I am.”

“He doesn’t look like one, does he?” Maki snickered, knowing exactly what hid behind the false appearances.

“I guess…” Nobara continued, still quite skeptical. Her reply mostly being for his appearances. “Well, my friend here thinks differently.”

Your eyes widened, “I didn’t say anything!”

“You said he was kinda cute!” Nobara reminded you. Your eyes were almost falling out of your eye sockets.

You were not the only one. Everyone present was quite taken aback by that comment. Not really expecting that at the moment. Yuuta couldn’t help but glance towards Inumaki, the boy’s face was half hidden, but he knew his friend enough to notice that little frown between his brows forming.

“And I guess you must be [name], right?” Yuuta tried his best to break the ice that was formed. You frowned at him, confused as to how he could possibly know your name. Catching on your reaction he continued, “Sorry if that sounded weird. I was away for missions, but my friends kept me updated about everything and everyone… Inumaki especially talked to me, so of course I’d know of you.” 

“Oh, well, yeah that’s me,” you chuckled, then turned towards Inumaki, his gaze was avoiding yours. He spoke about you? You quickly shook the newly forming delusions away. He must speak of every single one of you.

That’s just the kind of person Inumaki Toge was in your eyes. Sweet, kind, considerate, and so loving and caring about other people. To the point where he would limit his entire life to a few ingredients just to make it a little bit safer for everyone around him.

“Why are you here anyways, Yuuta?”

“Well, I wasn’t around for Christmas and New Years, at least on Valentine's Day I could spend it with my other single friends!” Yuuta cheered.

“Single?” Panda asked skeptically before whispering, “Is that safe to say for you?”

Yuuta could only chuckle, but you, Nobara, and Itadori were left confused. Itadori was the only one mouthful enough to bother to ask, “does Okkotsu-senpai have a girlfriend?” Others hesitated to answer, and when they did Itadori was quick to add thinking he got it wrong, “or boyfriend? …Partner, perhaps? …lover?”

“Yuuutaaa,” a screeching voice came out of nowhere bringing the three first years ready for combat, sensing the cursed energy around them becoming heavier out of nowhere.

“Calm down,” Maki warned, and you weren’t sure if she was referring to you first years who were instinctively in fighting positions, or Yuuta and whatever entity that was slowly appearing from behind him.

Everything within you, every training combat and exercise was pushing you over the edge to attack, but you hesitated. You pulled yourself and your instincts back, knowing well that if it was an enemy, your second years would be the first to react. With a deep breath, you calmed yourself down.

“Rika, it’s okay,” Yuuta was… reassuring the creature?

You frowned. Unsure how to react and even less sure what to think. Was that what made him a special grade? Was that even a cursed technique?

“Yuutaaa, why are they flirting with youuu?” 

The voice seemed to reverb until your bones, chilling your spine. But the tone seemed like that of a child throwing a tantrum, something about it seemed odd. It wasn’t until Panda started explaining the situation that Nobara placed her hammer back in her belt and Itadori let go of his tight fists.

“Sorry for having spooked you,” Yuuta apologised quickly after the explanation.

“It’s alright!” Itadori was the first to smile at him, “I understand your predicament.”

“Predicament uh, big words from you,” Megumi scoffed. “Trying to impress or something?” 

“Shut up,” Itadori gritted his teeth.

The second years all laughed, and Yuuta went back to the topic he was hoping to have since he came, “anyways, I was hoping we could all do something for the fourteenth? It’s a Friday so we all could go do something after classes…”

“I think that’s a fun idea!” Itadori cheered at the thought of being able to go out with his friends, “Maybe we can watch a movie?”

“I would love that!” Yuuta smiled fondly at the pink haired boy, “It’s been ages since I’ve been to the movies…”

“I’m going if we’re not watching one of those weird movies with long ass titles you like,” Nobara sighed.

“I heard they’re making a release of rom-com movies for the week of Valentines,” you brought up the ad you recently searched. It was in your plans to invite Inumaki for a date, but you knew that was never going to happen. This group activity could be the closest thing you could get to seeing him during Valentine’s day.

“Perfect!” Itadori looked through his phone to buy tickets for everyone before anyone could even agree on coming.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

You were a coward.

Or at least that’s what you have been thinking of. Hiding behind the opportunity of hanging out with everyone to avoid confessing your love and asking Inumaki on a date. Both Panda and Nobara have been cheering for you since the winter holidays to take a step, and you were sure that this Valentine’s was going to be your perfect opportunity. However, it all went to smoke when Yuuta came around (you pathetically excused yourself). Or maybe he gave you the opportunity to see Toge on Valentine’s day without having to confess your feelings. 

With this new motivation you thought of what you could possibly do to make the day a little bit more special for him. Maybe a Valentine’s gift was going to be enough? Or was that too forward?

You thought of giving him chocolate. But only giving him while giving others nothing felt kind of weird. So you started making everyone some cookies, something different from his but still made from the heart. But by the time you made everyone a pack of cookies, you noticed how his chocolates paled in comparison to homemade cookies. Sure you didn’t want his gift to stand out, but now it seemed like it was too little.

You racked your brain over what else you could do, but before you realised it, the first few rays of sun came through the window and you knew you had no more time to do anything else. You still had to prepare to go to class and fix the kitchen. With a calming breath, you told yourself that you’d have time during the lunch break. So without battling yourself over it for longer, you quickly cleaned the utensils and counter you used.

You almost didn’t make it to class in time, but fortunately, your training as a sorcerer was helpful to you in more ways than just fighting curses. Classes that day went smoothly. Well, not smoothly, more like they were just background noise for all the thoughts you were getting for later than day.  

“Hey let’s have lunch at th–”

“Sorry but I have to do something right now!” You said running away already, giving them no time to say anything. 

“Where is she going?” Panda asked, confused to see you running away.

It wasn’t often that everyone would have lunch together. Usually it was first years with first years, and second years among themselves. Often everyone would have their lunch alone too as they had their own things going on. But that was one of the rare times when Okkotsu was home from his long term missions, so they all decided to take advantage of that by spending more time together.

“We don't know either…” Itadori admitted.

“Girl things?” Megumi offered it as an excuse but he honestly didn’t care much. Compared to Itadori, he trusted you to do stuff on your own without getting in too much trouble.

Inumaki stayed quiet, not even offering an ingredient as an addition to the conversation as he usually does. The only one noticing his gaze fixed on you running away towards the dorm rooms was Yuuta.

“She’s probably okay,” he reassured his friend by putting a hand on his shoulder. “She doesn’t seem the kind of person to go through troubles by herself.”

“Tuna tuna,” the boy replied, his gaze lowering to the chocolate he hid in his pocket.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Other than your absence, the break went quickly and without a hitch. Everyone had a laugh sharing stories with each other. While for the afternoon classes, you were, once again, tardy, but nothing too outrageous to get the teachers to complain. Their annoyance seemed dissipated thanks to the sweet smell that came from the big paper bag you had with you.

Itadori couldn’t help himself, he had to ask about it. He leaned to the side and whispered closer to you, “What do you have there?”

“It’s just a little gift,” you giggled to yourself.

“It’s for Inumaki-senpai, isn’t it?” Nobara leaned in to join the conversation.

“Aww dang,” Itadori pouted back into his seat, his groan a little too loud catching a stern look from their teacher. He lowered his voice again, hoping it would be low enough to not be reprimanded despite knowing he could be heard anyways, “I wanted something too…”

“Just wait for later!” You tried to keep your voice low.

Patience wasn’t one of Itadori’s virtues. He kept poking at you during class, after class, on the way to the cinema, and when they were in line to claim their tickets. The others weren’t phased by anything at this point, especially when it came to Itadori, but Yuuta was new to the bunch.

“You guys seem like a good pair,” he said, smiling at you and Itadori. There was only a beat, before he realised his choice of word and had to add, “I meant that as a like platonic pair –like good friends–”

“Yeah,” Itadori laughed, “I imagined.”

“But what are you guys doing?” He asked, “Is this a normal occurrence?”

“More than you’d think,” Maki sighed. 

“It would stop if you could finally spill the beans,” Nobara poked at you. “What are you hiding?”

You looked at the remaining line for the movies. There was still quite a line, pairs of people for the most part, and those that weren’t were a group of girls celebrating in pink –galentines, you thought. There would be enough time before your group’s turn so you decided to take the opportunity at your grasp.

Putting down the paper bag, you started grabbing the elaborated pink bags tied each with a different coloured ribbon. Analysing the colours of the ribbons, you started to distribute them to all the different members of the group.

The green one to Maki. You assumed she’d prefer a darker chocolate flavour, given how much she enjoyed coffee in the early mornings. Similarly to Megumi’s, which was tied with a teal ribbon, who received coffee flavoured cookies from you.

In your hand you still had a red ribbon confection and there was no question to who it would go to. Even Nobara was eagerly looking at the bag with her favourite colour. The girl grabbed it from your hand before you could even offer it to her. Soft and chunky cookies inside, just like she likes them. Similar to hers, but bigger in size, was Panda’s. His bag was also the biggest one among the ones she held. A black ribbon wrapped around it tightly. 

After giving Panda his bag, there were only two more remaining. Yuji awaited his turn impatiently, his feet marching in place as a way to stimulate his eagerness. You almost wanted to keep his bag to tease him, but his face made you guilty enough to give his next. A bag adorned with a pink ribbon, and different flavoured cookies inside to reflect his chaotic nature. 

“Yaaay! Nothing beats homemade cookies!” He celebrated them above everyone’s head the moment he had them in hand.

Everyone chuckled at the boy, his enthusiasm contagious to everyone. But it wasn’t enough to keep Toge distracted for long. He looked at the last bag you held in hand, and could smell the sweet sweet cookies that fought their way out of the white ribbon.

“And this one…” you held the bag in front of you, “is for you!”

It wasn’t only Inumaki who was speechless, but among everyone was Yuuta, who hesitantly reached out for the bag you were handing him, “Me…? I–I wasn’t expecting anything… we–”

“Of course you get some too!” You laughed as if it was an obvious thing.

“Uh… how about Inumaki-senpai?” Itadori pointed out what everyone was thinking.

At his question, a dust of pink blush, similar to his ribbon, tainted your cheeks. You were trying to avoid doing this in front of everyone, but with everyone’s eyes on you, you had no choice. You opened up your purse, instead of the paper bag, hesitantly, hoping for an escape. And there it was, like the Gods answered your prayer.

“Next!” The lady called out for them.

This was enough to grab everyone’s attention to the cashier lady. In between busy choosing the movies and which seats to take, you took this opportunity to grab the purple tupperware from your purse and push it against Inumaki’s side.

“For you,” you whispered. “Happy valentines, Inumaki-senpai.”

You didn’t even let him say anything before you rushed your way after the other first years, who were arguing if it was better to have all seats in one row or take two rows of equal numbers.

“She gave you… tupperware?” Panda peaked over Inumaki’s shoulder, “Are the cookies inside?”

Inumaki could only shrug his shoulders. Some part of him wanted to have a cute bag with a ribbon too, but he shoved that feeling aside. He was about to eat cookies you prepared for him, who cared what they came into?

He carefully opened the tub but instead of the sweet smell of cookies he smelt the familiar scent of… onigiri?

The two looked at the tupperware container holding two rows of onigiris carefully placed over purple sheer paper. There was a moment of silence between them as they stared at the rice balls, before Panda started laughing dropping on the floor, catching the attention of people around them.

The silver haired boy could only frown and send a kick to his friend, “Bonito flakes!”

But the panda only laughed more at the unintended pun, “t-that’s right! There are bonito flakes –This may be the best prank ever!”

Toge looked back at the tupperware to notice one of the onigiris to have bonito flakes on top of it. That wasn’t common to have from store-bought onigiris –these were home-made, he concluded. With one look he searched for you among the first years, unsure truly how to react or feel about the gift he received. Although, once found the little bow on your head amongst the others, his doubts were somehow cleared. 

How could he not have noticed before? 

“What’s your favourite colour, senpai?” You once asked him once when the flowers were blooming and offered a various range of colours for him to pick on without having to speak out loud.

Inumaki looked pensive for a bit. Then pointed at a violet that was by her hand, “tuna mayo.”

You followed his finger with your gaze. For a second you thought he referred to your new set of nails, but then noticed the violet in between your pinky and ring finger. 

“Violet?” You asked to clarify.

He gave a single nod, “Salmon.”

“It’s a pretty colour!” You affirmed, “they’re similar to your eyes…”

Inumaki was once again grateful for the collar that hid his face and his red. Hoping to change the attention from himself to you, he pointed his finger back at you, “mustard?”

“Me?” You asked before thinking about it. You aren’t sure why you had to think about it. You knew what your favourite colour was. It has always been white. The infinite possibilities white could hold is far too alluring for you to not have it as your favourite colour. But after seeing the purple in Inumaki’s eyes, you hesitated for a bit. What were possibilities compared to the certainty that you found in him? “W-white,” you finally admitted after a moment too long.

Inumaki looked up at the sky, his gaze pensive and they looked farther away than where you ever could, but then he pointed at the clouds. You could only nod, smiling at him. 

“Yes, like the clouds.”

He then looked down at the ground. Picking a single daisy, he offered it to you. 

“Yes, like daisies.” You reached out for it and twirled it between your two fingers, “and mongolias… and jasmines –my favourite!”

Inumaki looked at you, his head tilted, “Mustard?”

“Yeah, I love Jasmines, they smell like comfort!”

Inumaki seemed to think about something for a bit, then brought his hand to his hair, he grabbed a few strands from his bangs and looked at it making cross eyes you giggled at. Then he looked through his bangs and directly at you, “Mustard?”

You frowned slightly unsure if you understood him correctly. This seemed to not translate to you in his ingredients, so he shifted his body towards you and clearly showed his hands. Back then, he was already studying sign language from the book you have gifted him on his birthday. He was still quite choppy on his sign language but he was getting the hang on it quicker than you did.

You knew his intentions and with a focused eye, you followed his hands as he unzipped his collar down. A sign of vulnerability from him, you learned. You tried to not get entranced by the snake fangs by each side of his mouth and forced your eyes to follow his hands instead. With all his fingers together he twisted the tips of them against each other. Colour.

“Colour?” You repeated his sign out loud and he gave you a nod.

He then pointed his pointer to his teeth showing his own fangs. The small smile he formed as he signed and flicked his finger, made you almost forget what he was trying to say. You shook your head trying to regain focus, but poor Toge assumed you didn’t know that particular sign and looked up instead to point at a new cloud. Then back to your daisy that still rested between your fingers. 

You nodded and repeated the sign for the colour white by grinning your teeth out and flick your pointer finger against it. “White,” you spoke out before bringing your two fingers at each side of your cheek as you dropped your hand down, your two fingers met at the tip of your chin. “I like the colour white.” Before a pause you added without sign language, “My favourite.”

He couldn’t avoid a smile at your words. He pointed at you before repeating your own sign. You. Bringing his fingers to his chins, highlighting his snake eyes, and dropping his hand to meet his two fingers to the tip of his chin. Like. Then he pointed at his forehead.

“Y-You…” You gaped before finally realising, “...r hair.”

He nodded and you could not keep in a smile, “yes, I do like your hair colour.”

White was your favourite colour. That was not something Toge would forget anytime soon. That was the colour of his hair, the colour of the flowers you smelt like, the colour of endless possibility. Ever since that afternoon at the field of flowers with you, he has seen the colour in a different way. 

He looked at your ribbon again, the one that held your hair together, but it wasn’t white like it usually would be to match your uniform, it was purple instead. His favourite colour. The same colour as the paper that held all his onigiri safe. Perhaps he didn’t get a bag with a purple ribbon, but he looked at his own colour on the ribbon that was tied on your hair.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

The movie was a hit. Everyone fell in love with the characters as much as they fell in love with each other. Itadori in particular was ecstatic over the ending.

“I can’t believe she wasn’t dead after all!” He jumped as everyone followed on the way back home, “I still don’t understand how it happened…”

“Of course you don’t, simpleton,” Megumi commented a few steps behind.

“It wasn’t said in the movie!” Itadori fought him.

“There are implications!” Megumi scoffed.

As the two argued between themselves you couldn’t help but laugh. It was nice to have a moment with them like that. With studying and missions, it was hard to find a time where everyone could act like normal kids –as normal as a sorcerer could get anyways. Having a literal panda walk with you guys didn’t really keep the attention away from the group. You could only guess the things going on inside people’s heads. But you assumed, just like you did when you met him for the first time, that people thought he was just one of those people who liked to get into anthropomorphic animal costumes. 

You looked behind you to check on the said friend, beside him, of course, there was Inumaki who already had his eyes on you. You knew it was too late, but you still looked away and hoped he didn’t pay mind to you. After giving him his valentine's gift, you weren’t sure how he would react, but he hasn’t said anything and that made you more anxious.

“You should make a move,” Yuuta approached him after witnessing the very short interaction.

“Tuna?”

“You never know when it’s too late,” the boy shrugged. “Sorcerers like us don’t have the privilege of time.”

Toge couldn’t look away from his friend. He was right, with all the missions you both had to go through, even more now after Sukuna’s return, there were no promises of a tomorrow. He only had today and his feelings. And with nothing more than that, the boy gave his friend a thankful wave as he caught up to you, who walked ahead of them.

You, in turn, hoped for any kind of reaction for your gift, a comment, a sign. You weren’t really expecting a grand thank you, but nothing seemed a bit too much. Sure you walked away the moment you passed the gift, but part of you was hoping for even a nod from the distance. 

You felt a tap on your shoulder and you knew it was him.

“Kelp,” he greeted you with a gentle nod.

“Hey, did you enjoy the movie?” You asked, hoping that the question would lead him astray from the thought of your onigiris. But it only did so much as he nodded again.

“Tuna tuna,” he changed the subject again, pointing at your purple ribbon.

You followed his hand, something you found yourself accustomed to at that point. “Ah yes, it’s new, do you like it?”

He paused before nodding at you, “salmon.”

“Seems like you hesitated there,” you chuckled, teasing him, but it didn’t seem to budge him at all.

“Onigiri,” you heard him say, that new word made you almost snap your head towards him in surprise. You weren’t quite sure if he meant that literally or if he was using new food-related words to communicate his thoughts. With a slight frown you tried to look for the answer in his subtle expressions.

“Onigiri…?”

He nodded, grabbing the tupperware you gave him from his bag, “onigiri.”

“Oh,” you nodded, “yes, onigiri.”

He then placed the tupperware back into his bag, allowing him to use his hands for signs. You watch him as he placed his left hand flat over a pointer finger directed towards you. With one single movement, he pointed towards you. Why?“Why onigiris?” you asked clarifying, he hummed at your interpretation. “Well, I thought you’d like to have onigiris, I just assumed they were your favourites since you chose the ingredients to be your vocabulary… Did I get it wrong?” “Bonito flakes!” Your worried expression made him shake his head as quickly as he could, hoping to shoo away your doubts. “Tuna mayo.”

“Yeah,” you chuckled. The sound of your light laughter was too soft for Inumaki to hear over the chatter of the people around. Especially with Itadori having a full conversation with Nobara right in front of you. He had it in mind to curse them to shut up for a second, just to hear your giggle better. But he quickly moved that bad idea aside when you spoke again. “Each of them have different ingredients inside, I made one of each of the ones you mention the most –There are two of tuna mayo, your favourite.”

Toge could only smile fondly at your words, his chest fluttering with affection towards you, even more than before. He thought about the savoury snacks he had in his backpack, and then of all the cookies and chocolates that were being exchanged throughout the nation at that moment, and he felt like he had the best deal out of all of them. You didn’t simply give him chocolate, like he initially would have wished for, but took time to think about what he would have liked most and actually make it. He puffed his chest lightly at the new treasure he held in his bag, eager to take a taste of them as soon as he could.

“Do you like it?” You asked, looking at him, as you all walked down the street, now closer to your school, “Maybe I should have given you cookies too…”

“Bonito flakes!”

“So you’re okay with it?”

He smiled at you, and he looked around before placing a hand on your shoulder. You looked at him in slight surprise, but his gaze was directed towards Panda, “Tuna tuna.”

The friend smiled at him and gave him a single nod, as the others continued to walk away. You saw Panda pulling Itadori away by his hood. Something about wanting to watch being mumbled away. Without Itadori and the rest, there was a soft silence around you, realising how much quieter things were when it was only you and Inumaki. Nothing awkward, just peaceful. But what did warrant for such quiet and for your friends to go ahead without you both? Your delusions were already jumping everywhere, and you had to push them away before you could get ahead of yourself.

Your gaze turned back to Toge, who had his eyes already on you. “Is there something wrong?” You asked unsure. You felt like there was something to be said, but couldn’t bring yourself to take the first step to leading the conversation.

He shook his head, before zipping down his collar. You were quite sure that he was going to use Sign again, so you followed his hands closely to focus. But to your surprise, he brought his fingers to your chin and gently pulled your face up to meet his eyes. 

This simple gesture was enough to cause you to sweat cold. You fidgeted with your fingers hoping to distract yourself from his, that were still on your chin. 

“Inumaki-senpai?” You asked hoping he would finally get to the point. You weren’t sure how much longer you could handle being so close to him without breathing.

He took a step back, much to your health. But his gaze was still fixed into yours, silently guiding you to not look away. Not that you could even if you wanted to, his eyes were as hypnotising as that of a snake luring a prey.

Then he did what you didn’t expect him to, he began to open his mouth.

“I…” he attempted, “have been practicing.” 

You swore your heart stopped the moment he opened his mouth and began to beat only at each word he spoke. Unsure if you were supposed to ruin the moment, you kept quiet, not daring even to move a muscle, afraid you might miss something.

He seemed to be thinking about it for a bit, then with careful breathing, he spoke again, “I have been practicing, to not infuse my words with cursed energy.” He paused as he breathed in a big chunk of air. You wondered if it took a lot of him to do so.

“That’s amazing, senpai,” you said before you even realised you were talking. Perhaps when Inumaki could talk, it was you who was rendered speechless. You looked for words to say as he smiled at you clearly quite proud of himself. “Since when?”

He paused before answering. For the first few times he did so, you thought it was because he was thinking about what to say, but it seemed like he was actually selecting which words to use. Despite him keeping from infusing his words with cursed speech he still deliberately thought of words that were still relatively safe to speak, just in case. 

“Since New Year’s Eve,” he carefully enunciated his syllables.

You couldn't contain your own smile, “You’ve made amazing progress!” 

He smiled back at you and gave a small polite bow, “Tuna mayo.”

You giggled at his favourite onigiri ingredient. Perhaps he was still more at ease with speaking like that. And to properly show his gratitude, he was going to do it with ease.

Then he took another deep breath in and nodded to himself. You watched him patiently, hoping for more words from him. It was cold, middle of february but spring was still so far away from arriving in the hills of Tokyo. But you paid no mind, you could stay there for an entire day and a night if it meant that you could have a conversation with Toge.

“I wanted to be able to speak properly with you,” he said after having attentively selected his words. He imagined everyone would practice their speech to themselves and to a mirror before giving it, and although he did so too, it still didn’t feel enough for him. Nerves got to him quickly as he inched closer to where he was aiming. He looked at you, hoping to gain courage from it, but it only made him even more nervous. 

In the long pause, you assumed he was done, so with a small smile you tilted your head, “that’s sweet, Inumaki-senpai.”

“Wait–” he shook his head, “Ikura.”

Your eyes widened slightly, shutting up. It was faint, but you felt the tingle of a cursed energy in his ‘wait’. It didn’t hurt, you noticed, his cursed speech never did hurt you. But it was an odd sensation crawling into your skin and grabbed onto your very muscle cells, forcing you to comply by pure force. There was worry in his eyes, as he noticed it too, but you smiled at him hoping to reassure the boy. With a single nod from you, he was able to breathe again. Perhaps your actions too had the same effect on him as his cursed speech. It took so little from you for him to change emotions and follow your silent commands.

“I wanted to tell you so many things,” he continued his thoughts from earlier. For the first time ever since you’ve known him, it was him speaking and you were listening. It was a dream that you never thought would be real. It made you so grateful for your world of curses, spirits, and impossibilities.

“I like the colour white too now,” he admitted out of nowhere, remembering that one afternoon in the field of flowers. 

“And I don’t actually like fish eggs…” he said, recalling that one time you offered some to him and he could only grimace at you. You never knew why he did, but now you knew it wasn’t directed at you.

“I don’t like morning assemblies,” he admitted before carefully selecting his next few words, “that’s why I never go.” –That’s why you never see me. He wished to say, knowing from Panda how often you looked for him during the assemblies. But if he said those words he was scared you would go blind, or worse, you’d never see him specifically.

He took a deep breath and then, just as he practiced, “I wanted to thank you for Christmas,” he said remembering how it was her idea to bring everyone to visit him, “and that I am sorry for taking your last grape on New Year’s Eve.” You tried to hide your smile at the memory. At the time, you were stunned and flustered, but looking back it was quite silly. But if that memory was not going to make you blush, his next words would have been enough to do so.

“And that you looked very beautiful.”

He smiled looking at you. Perhaps because he started to get the hang of it, he wasn’t feeling as nervous as earlier. But the more he spoke and the more he looked at you, he could only find more courage to spill all his secrets. To give you everything he had. To tell you every single thought he ever had selfishly hoping you’d keep them all.

“I was going to tell you on New Year’s Eve,” he continued before chuckling to himself, “but we got interrupted.”

The memory of your silent conversation on New Year’s Eve came back at you. The way he held his fingers on each side of his cheek close to expressing how he felt. You kept your eyes fixed on him, afraid to even blink. Afraid that in that fraction of a second where you blinked, your lashes might swipe him away from you or miss his words.

You had a vague feeling of what was to come. He was so close to telling you so many times that you developed so many ‘What-If’ scenarios that all of them resembled the one where you were in at the moment. You prayed to all the Gods looking over at you two, to the saint of Valentine’s day, that nothing would interrupt you anymore.

“This might be nothing compared to your onigiri, but…” You watched him as he pulled a chocolate bar from his pocket, and with another deep breath in, a solemn look, and a fond smile, he offered both the chocolate and his feelings to you, “I like you.”

[novlr]

How do I write a dream sequence that actually feels dreamy and not just confusing or random? I want it to make sense in the story but still have that weird, surreal vibe dreams have.

Before writing a dream sequence, ask yourself: Why is this dream important?

A strong dream sequence serves a narrative purpose. It either reveals something critical about the character or moves the plot forward. For example, it might:

Highlight a character’s inner conflict, such as self-doubt or guilt.

Offer insight into a character’s fears, desires, or memories.

Foreshadow future events.

Explore the story’s themes.

Present an epiphany or realisation that changes the narrative direction.

When you define the purpose of the dream, you give it meaning and ensure it doesn’t feel like a random, disconnected scene.

Vivid imagery and sensory details

Dreams are often hyper-real or surreal. To truly immerse readers, fill your sequences with vivid imagery. Describe not just what the character sees, but also what they hear, smell, and feel. For example:

The air might feel oppressively heavy, as if the character is moving through water.

Colours could be unnaturally bright or pulsing, creating a sense of unease or wonder.

Sounds may echo strangely, or voices may change tones mid-sentence.

Sensory details are your best friend when crafting dreams. They help you draw readers into the scene, making the dream feel almost tangible without being constrained to what is possible.

The power of symbolism

Dreams are often symbolic, reflecting a character’s subconscious thoughts and emotions. A dream sequence offers a fantastic opportunity to use metaphors and symbols to deepen your narrative. For instance:

A crumbling staircase may represent a character’s feelings of insecurity.

A recurring image, like a locked door, could hint at a secret the character is repressing.

Objects or people in the dream might represent aspects of the character’s personality or unresolved relationships.

By embedding symbols, you can subtly communicate deeper layers of meaning to your readers while building suspense without having to state things outright.

Heightened emotion

In dreams, emotions are often exaggerated. A minor embarrassment can swell into overwhelming shame, and a fleeting joy might feel like euphoria. Use this to your advantage to explore your character’s emotional state. For instance:

A character struggling with grief might dream of a loved one, only for them to disappear when approached.

A character racked with guilt could find themselves pursued by shadowy figures.

Striking a balance between disorientation and logic

Dreams are naturally disorienting because they don’t follow the logical flow of reality. You can introduce elements like sudden scene changes, nonsensical dialogue, or impossible physics to create a truly dreamlike experience. For example:

A character might start at a family dinner, only to inexplicably swimming in an ocean of stars.

A trusted friend might appear with the face of a stranger.

Despite the inherent chaos of dreams, your sequence should still have some degree of narrative coherence. A good rule of thumb is to maintain a logical thread that allows the dream to fulfil its narrative purpose, even if the details are illogical.

Establishing atmosphere

The tone and atmosphere of your dream sequence should align with its purpose. Focus on creating a specific emotional response:

For a nightmare, use eerie, oppressive details, like a pulsating fog or distorted, echoing voices.

For a whimsical dream, evoke wonder with surreal and magical details, such as floating landscapes and shimmering light.

Choose your atmosphere carefully to enhance the emotional impact of the scene.

Types of dream sequences to explore

There are many types of dream sequences, and each serves a unique purpose. Here are some of the most common:

Foreshadowing dreams: These hint at future events, creating suspense or intrigue.

Nightmares: These reveal a character’s fears or anxieties.

Fantasy dreams: These involve magical or surreal elements, and are often used to explore themes, symbols, or metaphors.

Recurring dreams: These underscore unresolved issues or patterns in a character’s life.

Lucid dreams: These allow the dreamer to be aware they’re dreaming and possibly influence the dream’s outcome.

Realisation dreams: These provide moments of clarity or epiphany for the character.

Internal conflict dreams: These visually showcase a character’s inner turmoil, providing a unique way to “show, not tell.”

Linked dreams: These connect two or more characters through shared dreamscapes.

Keep it brief and meaningful

Dream sequences should enhance your story, not derail it. While they offer a chance to be wildly creative, keep them concise and focused. Avoid overloading readers with too much detail or overly prolonged scenes. Your audience should leave the dream sequence full or curiosity, not overwhelmed.

Seamlessly transition in and out

Transitions are crucial for dream sequences. Start with subtle hints, like a sound, a sensation, or a surreal visual that cues readers into the shift from reality to dream. Similarly, exit the dream gracefully, creating a smooth return to the waking world. This ensures that readers are not jarred out of the story.

Writing tips for a dreamlike feel

Use narrative distance to create a floaty, disconnected feeling that mirrors the sensation of dreaming.

Experiment with stream-of-consciousness writing for portions of the dream to mimic the fluid and unpredictable nature of thoughts in sleep.

Pay attention to pacing. Dreams often feel both slow and rapid—a contradiction you can reflect by alternating between drawn-out descriptions and sudden, abrupt moments.

Dream sequences are a space where your imagination can truly run free while still serving the story’s deeper purpose. When done well, they are memorable and meaningful, and leave a lasting impact. It’s a technique well worth exploring.

[bloomzone]

things we forget are noooormal cuz we are humans after all !

Outgrowing friendships

Feeling lost sometimes

Not being productive every day

Needing rest without a reason

Changing opinions over time

Taking longer than others to succeed

Feeling unmotivated even about things you love

Having days where nothing feels right

Wanting different things than you did before

Feeling socially awkward in some situations

Losing interest in hobbies for a while

Not always knowing what to say

Making mistakes, even big ones

Feeling like you’re behind in life

Not being happy all the time

Needing reassurance

Being emotional for no clear reason

Struggling with confidence now and then

Taking time to heal from things

Still figuring yourself out

Changing your mind about people

Not always feeling close to family

Wanting to be alone sometimes

Feeling nostalgic for no reason

Finding comfort in routines

Outgrowing past versions of yourself

Being unsure about the future

Losing touch with people you once loved

Feeling overwhelmed by small things

Needing a break from social media

Not wanting to explain everything you feel

Having phases of intense motivation and then none

Struggling to balance everything

Feeling distant from yourself sometimes

Loving something but still procrastinating on it

Worrying about things that might never happen

Wanting more even when you have enough

Getting bored with routines you once loved

Feeling like you’re not doing enough, even when you are

Taking time to truly trust people

Feeling awkward in new situations

Laughing at something and then feeling sad right after

Not always loving how you look

Missing people you shouldn’t miss

Feeling like a different person at different times

Overthinking simple conversations

Not always having a clear goal in life

Wanting to start over for no reason

Changing your style or interests often

Feeling disconnected from your past self

Being unsure if you actually like something or just got used to it

Feeling guilty for relaxing

Finding it hard to accept compliments

Not knowing how to comfort someone properly

Getting random bursts of confidence

Feeling like you should be happier than you are

Comparing yourself even when you know you shouldn’t

Forgetting what truly makes you happy sometimes

Taking longer than expected to move on from something

Feeling homesick for a place or time that doesn’t exist anymore

@bloomzone

[cjsmalley]

Mothers Against the World:

When Selina first appeared with Terry in public, it was chaos as every paparazzo was on them as soon as she stepped from the car. And while normally she would welcome them, playing up the ‘might-be-Catwoman, might-not-be’ angle and complementing the Brucie Wayne personality as she hung off his arm or flashed his credit cards, she knew she was setting up a new image.

A mother. Someone maternal, a baby cuddled to her breast. That she was mothering Bruce’s infant son willingly, happily. That she was part of a united, harmonious family.

The tabloids had had a field day with Terry’s appearance in their lives; fuzzy pictures and possible sketches splashed across their covers; they proclaimed that Gotham’s Prince had lost his princess all over an illegitimate heir. That the baby spelt disaster, even discord for the Wayne Family. All because Bruce was old enough, and actually was, a grandfather and yet there was yet more proof of his playboy ways.

Like Bruce hadn’t, repeatedly and very firmly, declared he loved all his descendants, blood or not; as if the Wayne children hadn’t just as loudly and fervently declared that they loved their father and all strived to emulate his more mature qualities.

Terry was just another child for them to welcome and love. A besides, everyone who knew Brucie Wayne knew it was only a matter of time before…ahem, consequences came back to bite him.

Selina shielded Terry from the worst of the paparazzi, striking out at unsuspecting paparazzo with a murderous glare.

They had all met flirty Selina, silly Selina, captivating Selina, the beauty, the bombshell.

They were just now meeting the lioness protecting her cub. This was the Catwoman who helped Red Hood. The Catwoman still uncomfortable with getting her paws bloody but willing to do so in defense of children. This was the Catwoman who had faced down an angry, grieving Batman even while grieving herself for one of her birds.

Perhaps sensing trouble, Diana walked out of the family friendly diner Bruce had rented for their little get-together, and joined Selina’s fierce glare with one of her own.

The mothers of the Bat-descendants were meeting to let the children play somewhere outside the safety of the Manor or Palace.

Ophelia was in Diana’s arms, becoming fussy at all the flashing lights. Terry too was becoming fussy in Selina’s arms.

“Disgusting,” Diana spoke, every inch an Amazonian princess and ambassador, “that Man’s World would treat children like a spectacle because of who their father is.”

Her words found no sympathy as they completed the arduous trek to the diner’s doors and through them.

“Stupid paparazzi,” Danielle voiced from where she was nursing Bette, darkly.

“They never change, in the future,” Bart said from where he was playing with Connor and Mar’i in the play area.

“Pity.” Koriand’r sniffed from her spot near the counter, where Lian was coloring, before beaming, “Come, friends. Let us partake of a meal together.”

And so they did, each ordering something off the laminated menus the hostess handed out; the cook made it all admirably, he was no Alfred but he made delicious food.

The women chatted as the children played, or in Terry and Bette’s case napped after finishing their own meals.

Then it was time to face the paparazzi again; though this time they presented a united front as they walked shoulder to shoulder to the limousine that Bruce had sent.  

A picture of them walking as if to battle was splayed over the Gotham Gazette and several other papers the next morning.

Wished Away 9

Tylers meet Phantoms:

“Christ, Mum,” Rose said as she took in how Jackie, Pete, and Tony were dressed, “we’re just meetin’—”

“Royalty!” Jackie squeaked. They were all done up like they were meeting the Queen at Buckingham Palace itself!

“Honestly, Mum, they don’t care,” Rose rolled her eyes, grabbing her mother’s wrist and tugging her through the console room and to the wardrobe room, “I told ya ta dress casually. Let’s just hope the Ol’ Girl has clothes fer ya.”

It took about an hour to get everyone redressed, in things much more casual but still nice, before Rose led them back to the console room.

Jackie was clearly anxious, “Are ya—”

“’m sure, Mum. Danny an’ Sam don’t do formal unless they have ta. Unless you’re an annoying subject or someone threatenin’ war, ya don’t even have ta call ‘em by their titles. They’re just Danny an’ Sam ta family.”

“Lookie what I found,” Jenny bounded from the innards of the TARDIS, holding a tiny bike helmet.

She went to her toddler uncle and put it on him, making sure it fit right, “Landings in the Realms are worse than normal ones. The TARDIS does Her best but the Realms give her…nausea? A headache? She just doesn’t do good.”

“Oh, goody,” Jackie said lowly, hugging a strut for dear life already.

“Let me protect Anthony,” Bad Wolf came out, holding out her arms; without hesitation, Pete handed his son over.

Bad Wolf settled Tony in her arms, against her chest and shoulder, and then spread her feet and crouched slightly, clearly bracing for impact; she stayed steady even as the TARDIS began Her flight.

Everyone else was thrown about the console room, the Doctor and Jenny barely holding on to work the console, but Bad Wolf and Tony did not move an inch.

The landing was rough, just as Jenny said it would be, throwing even the Time Lords to the grated floor before the TARDIS stopped quaking.

Jenny recovered first and stood up, rubbing her shoulder, to peek out the doors, “We’re in the Palace. Uncle Danny and Aunt Sam are waiting…”

Slowly, everyone picked themselves up and Rose reemerged, straightening with some popping from her knees.

Jenny led the procession out, racing to hug a man and a woman, “Uncle Danny, Aunt Sam! How’re you?”

Danny and Sam chuckled and hugged her as one, “Good, doing good. You?”

“Perfect!”

She let go of them to drag Jackie, who was hesitant, forward, “This’s my Gran, Jackie. Mum’s side, duh. Completely human. He’s my step-granddad, Pete, and Mum’s holding my uncle, Tony.”

“Yer Majesties,” Jackie tried to curtsy even though she was in trousers, “an honor ta—”

“Oh, enough,” Sam chuckled, “didn’t they tell you? We don’t do formalities with family.”

“Family?” Jackie’s eyes were wide, “I know Rose said—but—”

“We count Clockwork as family,” Danny explained, “and he’s claimed the Doctor as family. The Doctor and Jenny. Rose’s basically married in by this point. Common-law, you understand. That makes her family our family. Welcome to the Palace, your home in the Infinite Realms.”

“My god,” Pete muttered, somewhat disbelieving.

“Not a god, not yet anyways,” Danny winked.

“Where’s Dani?” Jenny burst out, “Is she still in school?”

Sam grinned, “With Anakin, in the nursery. We let her stay home today.”

“Oh, Gran! Can I introduce Tony to Anakin? Please!” Jenny nearly begged.

“Anakin’s our youngest,” Danny explained kindly, “around Tony’s age, actually. We also have a nanny looking after them, Nanny Clara. He’d be perfectly safe.”

“Well…” Jackie looked to her husband, who nodded, “if you’re sure.”

Jenny cheered and took Tony from Rose, dashing off with him deeper into the Palace.

“Jenny knows the Palace as well as anyone,” Sam assured, “and if she gets lost, she can flag down a servant for help. She’s heading directly for the nursery. It’s the most defensible part of the Palace.

Danny stood up, helping Sam, “C’mon, we can talk over food; stay close, Tylers. Doctor?”

“Rose and I can bring up the rear,” the Doctor agreed, taking Rose’s hand as they began walking.

The Palace was a gothic masterpiece, in a very literal sense, though even Sam had wearied of all the gloom and had sought artists and artwork to fill the halls, soft, plush carpets and tapestries to keep the warmth, glassworks to fill the once barred windows. Statues and busts dotted the hallways, some classical, some avant garde

Masters had given their masterpieces, their magnum opuses; they were paid handsomely of course, in either coin or material.

Oils, watercolors, acrylics, textiles, glass, all created for Her Majesty the Ghost Queen. For His Majesty the Ghost King.

It wasn’t yet a riot of color, nor would it ever be, but it was more alive.

Jackie gasped and the group stopped, turning as one to see what had captured her attention.

“When they said the family was huge…”

Ah, it was the most recent family portrait; all the children were gathered around Danny and Sam, all in formal wear.

“We…sometimes people sell the souls of children to me,” Danny started, causing her and Pete to whip around to him in horror, “I know, it’s horrible, isn’t it? But anyways, we adopt the kids. Only Dani—Danielle—isn’t adopted.”

He pointed out each child and gave their backstory.

“Good Lord, you were young!” Pete said at Damian’s story.

“Old enough to be king,” Danny shrugged helplessly, “it…it wasn’t easy, we had help, so much help, and we made mistakes…”

“All parents do,” Jackie told him softly.

“So we’ve been told,” Sam smiled just as softly, “and we’ve learned and made new ones with each kid.”

Danny coughed and continued to point out kids and tell stories, until all had been covered and then they moved on.

As they neared the dining room, Danielle and Jenny joined them with each holding a toddler.

“Oh my,” Jackie said, taking in the Anakin Skywalker; she knew who he grew up to be, or would have if he had not been adopted.

“We’re hungry, Dad,” Danielle said.

Danny waved them into the dining room where the smaller table was already set for a meal; there were two chairs with booster seats and Jenny and Danielle put Tony and Anakin in them before sitting beside them and helping them get food.

The group chatted over the meal, Jackie and Pete slowly relaxing at how easy going the Royals were, and generally had good cheer.

After the meal was done, Jenny asked, “Do we put their photo up on the family wall now? I know you’ve got me, Dad, and Mum…”

Danny chuckled, “We can, if they’re okay with it.”

“Family wall?” Pete questioned.

“We keep walls of pictures of the extended family,” Sam explained easily, “you know, like Rose, the Doctor, and Jenny. Harry’s and Neville’s parents. Damian’s paternal birth-family. The Royal Portrait is just the immediate royal family. The walls are for everyone and everything else.”

Danny and Sam led the group out of the dining room and down another hallway; the walls were plastered with photographs. Some were professional, most were candid and amateur.

A common camera sat on a small round table; a high-end camera but nothing too expensive or professional.

Danny picked it up, saying, “If Jackie, Pete, and Tony don’t mind—”

Jackie decided it would be a family photograph and dragged the Doctor in; Rose and Jenny came without complaint.

Danny took a set of pictures.

After that was done, it was decided it was time for the Tylers to leave, taking pity on the still disgruntled TARDIS.

They were, however, invited to the next family gathering.

[adverbally]

Give Me More Than Just Some Butterflies

Written for the @stmarchmm prompt “breeding” | wc: 2,057 | rated: E | cw: sexual content, references to intentional pregnancy and babies/pups | tags: Steddie, omega Steve, alpha Eddie, established relationship, bondmates mating cycles/in heat, intersex omegas, trying to conceive, breeding kink, knotting | title from “Juno” by Sabrina Carpenter

———

When Steve’s heat finally hits, he’s been anticipating it for so long that he’s not sure what to do.

For months, he and Eddie have been talking about trying to get pregnant. They’re bonded, they have a spare bedroom for a nursery, their loved ones are there to support them and spoil the hell out of their baby. Steve’s off his birth control. They’re ready. Really. All they need is one good heat.

But now Steve’s pacing the length of their bathroom before dawn, burning with fever but wracked with chills, pressing the heels of his hands into his aching eyes, feeling utterly terrified.

This isn’t just some abstract plan for the future anymore. Here and now, they’re taking responsibility for a living, breathing human being that they’re going to create together. It’s everything Steve has ever wanted. It’s his worst nightmare. His heart is racing with the need to have his alpha close, to be taken care of and knotted until he’s thoroughly pupped, but his hands won’t stop shaking and he thinks he might be sick.

Steve sits on the cold tile, the bathmat shoved aside so he can feel the comforting chill on his bare legs. The porcelain of the bathtub behind him has a similar effect along his back and shoulders. When he tilts his head back, the tub is the perfect height to rest his skull on the ledge next to their toiletries.

It has to be nerves, right? He still wants this so badly his hands twitch at the thought. A baby, their baby, with that powdery clean scent and Eddie’s big brown eyes, maybe Steve’s nose. A whole little person to watch over and teach and love until he takes his final breath. A family of their own. God, he can’t think of anything he wants more.

That soothes something in Steve’s gut, makes him feel like his chest isn’t about to collapse in on itself. Maybe what he thought was anxiety is really just excitement. Maybe it’s just a natural fear of change, even if the change is a good thing.

Steve gets to his feet. Enough freaking out. He splashes some cold water on his face, which doesn’t do much for the feverish pink spots high on his cheeks but makes him feel calmer. He’s gonna go back out there, call in his heat leave, and wake up his mate so they can make a baby.

Eddie promptly derails that plan by scaring the hell out of Steve, who wasn’t expecting him to be standing right outside the bathroom door.

“Sorry!” Eddie exclaims, his own eyes wide with surprise. “Just, you weren’t in bed when I woke up and your scent was—”

“My heat is starting.”

They blink at each other for a moment before Eddie breaks the stunned silence. “Oh my god,” he says softly, covering his mouth with both hands. Then he laughs and throws his arms out and shouts excitedly, “Oh my god!”

His enthusiasm is contagious. Steve smiles as Eddie pulls him into a clumsy kiss, their teeth clacking and noses bumping, hugging tightly enough to bruise.

“Really?” Eddie asks, pulling away to hold Steve’s face between his hands like he can tell whether he’s in heat just by looking at him. Actually, he probably can tell by the feverish flush across Steve’s cheeks and the warmth of his skin, but he still asks.

“Yes, really,” Steve confirms.

Eddie kisses him again, then he starts herding Steve toward the bed like he’s some kind of sheepdog. “Okay, you get comfy. I’ll call the school and tell them you’ll be out for the week.”

“Will you call Robin, too? She’ll get the word out so nobody worries if we don’t answer the phone.”

“Of course. Be back in a jiffy.”

Eddie practically runs out of the room and all Steve can think is: That man’s gonna be the father of my children.

It sends a wave of want through him. Eddie will be here in less than five minutes, then he’ll fuck Steve and put a baby in him, just like they planned. A shiver runs up his spine, feverish and excited. He should be ready for Eddie when he comes back.

Steve steps out of his boxers and climbs into bed, settling himself on Eddie’s pillow. He inhales the scent of smoke and amber, dark and warm, and thinks about smelling it straight from the source. In just a few minutes, he’ll be nipping at the bonding mark on Eddie’s neck and breathing him in to his heart’s content.

Just thinking about it makes Steve squeeze his thighs together against the ache he feels. He’s so empty, and Eddie’s the only one who can fix it. Even as he slips two fingers, then three, inside himself, Steve imagines more: the perfect fullness of Eddie’s cock, the delicious stretch of his knot. The way his belly will swell after Eddie knocks him up.

“Couldn’t wait for me?” Eddie asks from the doorway.

Steve lets out a whine at the prospect of having his mate so near but not being touched by him yet. His own hand is a poor substitute for Eddie’s, missing his calluses and the coolness of his poor circulation and the way he knows how to play Steve just like his beloved guitar. It’s not enough.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Eddie’s voice is suddenly coming from right next to him, perched on the edge of the bed. His hand on Steve’s face is a relief, like a cold glass of water. “I’ve got you.”

“Want it,” Steve tells him, pleads with him as he gropes for any bare skin he can reach, desperate to feel Eddie, real and solid beside him.

Eddie gently grasps Steve’s wrist, pulling his hand from between his legs with a slick squelch. “Do you need more prep first or are you—?”

“Just your cock,” Steve huffs, shifting impatiently. He doesn’t think he’s ever been so affected by a heat before. Probably something to do with stopping his birth control, he guesses, but the cause doesn’t matter much when he’s being hollowed out and burned alive by the overwhelming want that’s flooding through him.

And he must have missed Eddie moving again, because he’s startled by the sensation of Eddie’s cock sliding through his folds. Kneeling between Steve’s spread thighs, Eddie doesn’t thrust inside yet, just nudges the head of his cock against Steve’s and smears his wetness around with every slow roll of his hips. He knows how badly Steve needs him and he’s still toying with him.

It’s starting to hurt now, the way his cunt clenches around nothing while his mate is right there. “Please, Alpha, please,” he begs, arching his back and reaching for Eddie’s hips to try to guide him inside.

Eddie catches both of his wrists in one giant hand and presses them into the pillows above Steve’s head. He leans down, their bodies pressed together from hips to shoulders, and buries his face in the crook of Steve’s neck, right over his mating bite.

The scrape of Eddie’s teeth is a silent reminder of their bond, thrumming through Steve like a plucked string. Telling Steve not to worry, asking for his trust, promising that he’ll be taken care of. Steve relaxes at his alpha’s reassurance. He’s still needy, still heat-drunk and aching for Eddie’s knot, but no longer frantic with it.

“So good for me,” Eddie murmurs, releasing Steve’s wrists. With his newly freed hand, Eddie takes hold of his cock, right at the base where his knot is already starting to swell, and slowly feeds it into Steve’s cunt.

Steve doesn’t think he could speak if he tried. Eddie is so hot and thick inside him, it’s like he’s pushing all the air out of Steve’s lungs so he can’t make a sound. All he can do is cling to him, fingers tangling in Eddie’s hair where his arms are locked around his neck, and let his mouth hang open as he gasps for breath.

“There you go, sweetheart,” Eddie sighs as he bottoms out. His first thrusts are tentative, gentle rocks in and out that glide smoothly through Steve’s slick. “That’s what you needed, huh? My cock filling you up?”

“Eddie.” His name feels so good in Steve’s mouth, as good as Eddie’s cock stuffing his pussy to the brim. They fit together like they were made to, so easy that Steve doesn’t have to think. He can just focus on the hot drag of each stroke, the way Eddie can get so deep with just a twitch of his hips, carving out a space inside Steve that nobody else will ever be able to fill.

“You’re so fucking beautiful. I swear, it’s like you’re already glowing.”

He believes it, can practically feel it radiating from his skin, soaking into the sheets beneath him. It makes him smile, then chuckle when Eddie beams back at him. God, he doesn’t think he’s ever felt this way. Joy and pleasure just keep bubbling up in his chest, lighter than air, like he’s a helium balloon, bobbing as they rock together.

Then Eddie pauses to adjust the position of Steve’s knee, and the next thrust takes Steve’s breath away when Eddie’s cock hits him just right.

“Fuck,” he moans, rolls his hips into the next one to relish the way he feels even fuller at this angle. “More, please, I need—”

“Shhh, I’ve got you.” Speeding up his pace, Eddie drives in even deeper, the slap of his hips obscenely loud each time they meet the slick-smeared skin between Steve’s thighs. “I’m gonna give you everything you need, baby, don’t you worry.”

The promise pounds in Steve’s ears in time with his heartbeat. Eddie will take care of him. Eddie will fuck him better than anyone else ever could, will empty himself inside Steve and then knot him for good measure, again and again until Steve’s heat breaks. Until he’s bred, full with as many pups as Eddie can give him.

He must’ve been thinking out loud, because Eddie cups his cheek tenderly and murmurs, “That’s right, honey, all the puppies you want. Gonna be such a good mama.”

“Want it,” Steve agrees, nuzzling into Eddie’s touch. Warm and safe here in their nest, with his Alpha’s knot starting to catch at his hole, he knows without a shadow of a doubt that he’s coming out of this heat pregnant. It feels too right to fail. He hums his satisfaction against Eddie’s hand.

“Getting close for me?” Eddie slows his hips, returning to the slow grinds that make Steve’s toes curl. “Wanna come on my cock like a good Omega? Squeeze every last drop out of my knot so you can have my baby—”

Steve goes silent when he comes, unable to catch his breath or put together a coherent thought. His pussy spasms around Eddie’s cock until his Alpha can’t pull away, can only rock into the wet clutch of him as his knot pops past Steve’s rim.

“Oh, fuck, Stevie,” Eddie pants. He muffles his groan in the crook of Steve’s neck, mouthing at his mating bite as he spills inside of him.

If he hadn’t still been riding out his first orgasm, the sensation would be enough to make Steve come again. He’s acutely aware of each jerk of Eddie’s cock, each hot spurt filling him, his Alpha’s knot swelling further to lock them together. It settles him in a way he didn’t know he needed, sates him so completely that he goes limp in Eddie’s arms.

He can hear Eddie speaking to him, though he sounds far away. “So good for me,” he soothes, trailing kisses along Steve’s jaw and raking sweat-damp hair away from his forehead. “My beautiful mate. I love you so much.”

Steve ducks his head to capture Eddie’s lips with his, gasping when the movement makes Eddie’s knot twitch. “Love you, too, Alpha. Took such good care of me,” he croons. He laces his fingers with Eddie’s and tugs their joined hands to rest over his lower belly, still flat but full of promise. “Of us.”

“Always,” Eddie vows, sealing it with another soft kiss. “Now get some rest before the next wave hits.”

“Then you can make sure it takes,” Steve grins.

———

It does.

[a-d-nox]

pac/pap: rainbow road - where are you on your journey? what must you overcome? what's the final destination?

about a year ago we did a similar PAC - consider this a check up on your journey! take what resonates leave what doesn't - nothing is 100% for you because these aren't personalized so please no angry comments or dms about what i am saying not being a good fit for you or that you "don't claim" just keep scrolling if that is the case. be kind, self reflect, and have fun.

last pac/pap: a letter from your future spouse

return to the masterlist of pap/pac posts

paid reading options: astrology menu & cartomancy menu

enjoy my work? help me continue creating by tipping on ko-fi or paypal. your support keeps the magic alive!

pile one

you’re in this phase of questioning your stability, legacy, or long-term security (10h themes). this could mean you're primarily focused on financial concerns, family tensions (particularly with masculine figures), and/or feels that traditional paths aren’t working for you. you might need to redefine your success on your own terms, break away from expectations, and/or face a temporary setbacks without fear of setbacks.

you might be overcoming procrastination, self-doubt, and/or a lack of follow-through when it comes to your goals. you may have a tendency to get distracted, feel unmotivated, and/or struggle with discipline when it comes to your long-term plans/planning. this could be related to finances, career ambitions, and/or personal development - perhaps you tend to start things with excitement but find it hard to stay committed.

your final destination suggests a journey of learning to release control, surrender to the flow, and find inner alignment before pushing forward. your path may not be about forcefully charging ahead, but rather it's about overcoming internal obstacles - such as self-doubt, lack of direction, and/or having conflicting desires.

pile 2

you’re in a phase of holding on - it could be anything like finances, security, emotions, control, etc. you might have the urge to protect what you have, whether that’s material resources, personal boundaries, and/or emotional investments. your reluctance to let go of something (or someone) could very well be a fear of change.

you must overcome impulsiveness, recklessness, and/or the tendency to charge ahead without considering all the consequences. you may be driven by intense ambition or strong opinions, but this energy can sometimes lead to burnout, conflict, and/or missed details.

your final destination at this moment is deep self-reflection, breaking free from your self-doubt, and learning to trust your inner voice / intuition once more. you might be struggling with fully embracing your purpose and/or answering your intuition due to fear, uncertainty, and/or unresolved past issues.

pile 3

you’re in this phase of emotional exploration, creativity, and openness. it's a period of curiosity, new beginnings in love (not just romantic) and/or self-expression, and embracing a more intuitive side of yourself. you might receive messages from your subconscious, or feeling drawn to creative pursuits, OR find yourself experiencing a sense of wonder in your relationships or regarding personal growth (you have come a very long way).

you might be holding onto a need for external validation, stability, and/or find yourself celebrating prematurely. you could indicate a resistance to change because of your comfort with what is most familiar to you or you may fear disruptions in your life.

your final destination aligns with becoming self-reliance, learning to trust your own abilities, and breaking free from unhelpful dynamics (getting some family vibes for a majority of you). it may indicate a path where you move away from relying on external validation, teamwork (gotta do your own thing upcoming), and/or traditional structures. you will instead forge your own path - even if that means doing things differently or alone.

[sacrilegesummer]

Wet, Hot, American Nights - Part 1

Heat of the Moment

summary: Steve thinks summer camp is terrible until a conversation that sparks a new found appreciation for all that camp can do for a person, and maybe he'll even make a friend out of it. warnings: underage drinking, future smut (maybe idk monkey covering eyes emoji), bad writing :p a/n: I am VERY nervous pls be kind this is the first time I have ever posted ANYTHING i've written (at my big age). I am really trying to not describe the reader in any way besides age and gender, but if there's something written that feels like projecting a certain look, pls lmk and I will edit/fix it for the future:)

word count: 4.5k

Camp Elk Heart was your home. You knew the layout of Elk Heart like it was the back of your hand. Every turn, every dip in the path, every root and stone, your body had grown accustomed to the trails like it was a part of you. It was a beautiful Friday evening, no clouds, hot but not too humid, and a rare silence was set over the camp grounds. After cleaning all of camp, a brutal time consuming task that was always the bane of everyone’s Friday, you took a well deserved shower. Scrubbing for nearly thirty minutes at your scalp to alleviate all the dirt and sand that kicked up throughout the busy day and cleaning your face to wash away the marks from teary eyed goodbyes to your campers. You changed into a tank top and a pair of sweatpants and as you went to put your shoes back on, you realized you left your sandals in the dining hall. Stepping out of the bathhouse and on to the trail, you grimace as you glance down at your once clean and bright pink shower shoes now dirty, with gravel stuck in the holes after only a few steps.You began to walk a little quicker to the dining hall.

As you walked you admired the land camp occupied. The pines that grew as tall as cathedrals, the lagoon that in its stillness reflected the sky in between large patches of water lilies, and the look of the freshly painted cabins settled in the trees. You came to camp a few weeks early to help with that task, and you took pride in your work. Camp had given you so much, you would do anything to keep in good shape, both internally and externally. You saw a head of hair through the window as you approached the dining hall, not giving it much more thought as you ripped the heavy door open. 

The AC was emitting a terrible grinding noise as you walked into the dining hall, but you were still absolutely sweating despite the pitiful movement coming from the machine. You thought of the last few things you needed before heading home for the weekend. Making a list in your head, dirty laundry, sandals, swimsuit, repeating so you wouldn't forget. Nearly every weekend someone hosted the whole camp for a couple nights. And this week, it was your turn to offer up your house to your friends and co-counselors for the weekend. After this week in the heat, everyone could use a break. A fun, alcohol fueled break. 

You walked briskly into the break room collecting your well worn pair of sandals from your cubby. You noticed your coworker, Steve Harrington, sitting on the couch, clearly not packed or ready to go, he might have even been pouting, you couldn’t tell. You were going to just keep walking, but instead you whipped around and smiled at him.

“Hey! Are you coming tonight?” 

Steve looked up from his Game Boy, the sounds of Super Mario playing gently from the small device in his hands. He looked surprised. 

“Oh, uh, is there something going on tonight?” Steve questions, sounding a little irritated. 

“Yeah! I put it on the Staff board a couple days ago,” you said, acting a little too happy and kindly gesturing towards the note that clearly said ‘MY HOUSE, THIS WEEKEND’ with your address listed below. 

“I’m hosting the party this weekend. Bring beer and a sleeping bag. My dad has a tent set up. You can probably ride with Robin if you ask nicely” you grinned at him. 

Steve first tilted his head towards the board and his face grew red, then he nodded and said, “Okay, I’ll be there.”

You give him a nod back and swiftly turn around, continuing the walk back to your cabin. Steve was…odd. He seemed very charming and friendly, but the only person he ever talked with was Robin, to everyone else he was distant and aloof. Despite this being her first summer as a counselor, Robin had been attending Elk Heart almost as long as you have. Coming to camp for the first time at 8 years old, you completely fell in love with the place. Robin had started going several years later but as campers you became fast friends, growing even closer this summer as counselors.

This was your first summer back since you were 17, and now, at 22, you felt prehistoric compared to the fresh faced 18 and 19 year olds. Steve was the next oldest person after you and Torres, the Northside Director, but Steve was one of the few staff who had never come to camp before. You had sympathy for him, coming to a camp where everyone knew each other and had their friends… that’s a hard barrier to break through. Secretly though, you think the reason Steve only talks to Robin is because he thinks he’s too good for the place, and she just happens to naturally be incredibly cool. You’d heard him complaining about the short breaks despite working 6 days a week, the exhaustion that came with camp life and the lack of ‘babes’ at camp one day. That left a sour taste in your mouth. 

You shook your head from these thoughts, maybe he’s just shy and the shared trauma of being Co’s the first week brought them close. He’s probably not the jerk you’re making him out to be. You entered your cabin and began to stuff your clothes into your duffle bag. Toiletries, towels, dirty laundry, swimsuit… you put your sandals back on your feet and ditched your shower shoes. The one strap sandal was ugly, but functional! You took a second to admire your tan lines, even more obvious now that you’ve scrubbed your feet of all the sand, dirt, and mud that accumulates in a singular day. You completely adored being outside, and the starkness of the tan lines felt like a status symbol. 

A car horn interrupts your thoughts and you hear your friend and fellow counselor, Eddie, scream from his beat up van, “Hurry up Sunshine! Gotta try an’ beat the sunset!” You continued to stuff all the things you needed, triple checking mentally and praying you didn’t leave anything behind. It was only a weekend, but you hated being unprepared. Turning all the lights in the cabin off, you jog out to Eddie’s van.

“I’m here, I’m here!” you shout over the music blasting from the radio. You crack open the door and settle yourself on the worn in passenger seat and chuck your bag into the laps of Torres, Nancy, and Jonathon, all stuffed into the backseat. “Can you toss that in back for me please?” you give the three of them a sweet look and smile. Torres flashes you a sparkling smile and tosses it behind him. 

“You were supposed to meet us at the dining hall! Had to track you down,” he laughed as he grabbed your shoulder playfully. 

“You know how I am,” you roll your eyes playfully. “Had to get some last minute things and thank you for saving me the front seat! Do you know who's all coming?”

Nancy picks up her little pen and paper and begins to read off the list she very generously created to keep track for you, “Robin is driving half of Southside, the other half is driving with Mae, Argyle is bringing all of the people on Northside who are going but Cabin 2, 14, and 4 can’t make it this weekend, so… most of Boys side. I mean Northside.” she rambled.

“Okay, but most of the camp is coming, so that’s great. The tents’ big, but they're not that big!” you laughed and then held your tongue for a moment, “Do you know if Steve is coming?”

Nancy raised an eyebrow. “He hasn’t said anything to me. Do you think he got the invite?”

“Yeah, no, I just invited him in when I saw him in the Nor’wester room. Told him to talk to Robin,” I said, trailing off. “I just don’t want him to think I’m like- excluding him or something you know?” I blurted out, looking back at Nancy in the back seat and then at Eddie, sounding a little desperate. 

“I’m sure he’s fine, his ego can take the hit,” Eddie said, passing you his cigarette. As you accept, he asks, “Should I stop at the Junction gas station or wait until we’re closer?”

“Closer, we can get ice at the closer station too”

Eddie smiles and turns the music up even more as you crank his window down, letting the wind whip your hair and cool yourself down, excited for the night but desperately needing a small moment to yourself. 

___

The party is in full swing, bonfire roaring, red solo cups and stomachs full, thanks to your mom’s huge feast. You settled on some light beer and mixed vodka drinks for the night, ‘the full spectrum’, Eddie joked earlier. Filling another cup with a shot or two of cheap vodka and cranberry juice, you walked over to your seat by the bonfire, next to Torres.

“Enjoying the night?” he asked as you sat down, the fire flickering on his smiling face. Torres was one of our international staff members, but you couldn’t wrap your head around the fact he came all the way from Gudalajara to Elkhart, Indiana of ALL places.

“Of course! Are you?” you asked him, leaning close. At the beginning of the summer you harbored a bit of a crush on the man. How could you not! He was handsome and fit and very affectionate, but after a… pretty intense weekend at Mae’s parents house, you both decided to remain friends. Besides, camp relationships hardly ever worked out, it was like incest. Campcest. And you valued his friendship too much to ever ruin that.

“Yeah it’s great, your parents were so kind to do all of this, we’re not an easy crowd to handle you know,” and he wiggled his eyebrows a little and you giggled. 

“I know, Eddie’s already broken one of my mom’s chairs. He begged for forgiveness and promised to repay her but nothing will change the fact that he’s an idiot,” you rolled your eyes. 

Torres laughed at that, and a comfortable silence fell over the two of you. After a distant yell, your friend Patty came over, grabbing on to Torres’s arm, “Torres, you have to be my partner in pong. I will totally suffer without you,” she flirted, looking at him expectantly. Patty was beautiful, tall and thin, with long black hair and the most striking blue eyes you’ve ever seen. You didn’t mind that she liked him, just because you think of it as incest doesn’t mean everyone thinks that way. Besides, they were both close friends of yours, you only wanted them to be happy. 

“Of course pretty girl,” he smiled as he got up, shooting you a wink. You winked back and took another sip of your very strong drink. You stared into the fire for a moment thinking you were alone, appreciating the moment of solitude. You loved hosting but you could only be a social butterfly for so long before you grew exhausted. When you raised your head to look around, Steve was a few plastic chairs away,  already looking at you. He quickly looked away, thankful for the fire to hide his blushing face. You stood up from your chair and walked carefully over to him, being sure not to seem too drunk. Plopping down into the plastic chair next to him you smiled. 

“How are you doing Steve?” you asked him. It was weird. Normally you both were the life of the party. Dancing on table tops, getting kicked out of bars, and trying to beat each other in a shotgun race (your special trick was flashy, but not very effective in a race so he usually won). Tonight though, you were much calmer due to a pretty tiring, hot week with some of your toughest (and most rewarding) campers. 

“I’m good, just a little tired,” he smiled and took a sip out of his water bottle. 

“Me too,” you glanced down at his water bottle, “No drinks tonight? ” you said, faking surprise.

He shook his head and laughed a little, “I promised Robin I would bring her back in the morning and I really don't want to do that hungover. I've had a couple beers though, don’t worry. I’m in a…good spot for now.” He leaned up and to his left, reaching into his back pocket, pulling out a pack of Newports. He sat back and lit one, taking a small drag, he offered it to you, raising his eyebrows. You reached out and imitated him, taking the tiniest inhale. 

“Well, that’s good. Just want to make sure you’re having a good time,” I said very earnestly. A beat of silence. I really don’t know anything about him you thought, disappointed in yourself. Sitting here, realizing you’ve never even been this physically close to him, you felt this deep urge to keep talking to him. Get to know him. Maybe make a friend. 

“Is it weird?” you asked a bit abruptly, passing back his cigarette, “Like, this kind of culture? You’ve never worked at camps before, right?”

“Yeah I mean, it's not what I imagined,” he grimaced a little, “but it’s been alright. I like being able to get tan while lifeguarding,” he said, squishing his face in distaste and taking another drag. “Everyone’s nice…really nice! I don’t know, I just kinda feel different from everyone,” he said slowly, his eyes raking over you in a way that you assume was very unintentional. 

Suddenly, one of your favorite outfits became a source of insecurity. It was simple, but maybe a little too colorful for something so casual. Your shorts were second hand, a light purple pair of quick dry shorts and your sweatshirt was an almost headache inducing pattern of pink, yellow, brown, and purple, but it was your favorite, and the only Patagonia thing you’ve ever purchased. It was expensive, but you were just so drawn to it you had to get. Now, you’re wondering if the bright pattern was off putting to others. You loved how you looked, you thought it screamed ‘camp counselor’ but now you’re wondering if it's just screaming ‘i’m weird - look at me I love attention!!!’. You looked around for a moment. 

“What do you mean? You don’t totally love kids wetting the bed, showering only twice a week, and 6 days of straight 100 degree heat or only pouring rain?” I said, wanting to get my mind off my own insecurities, realizing I was probably overreacting. It seemed malicious though, especially considering every single day he wore jean shorts or an expensive pair of brown hiking pants, while rotating the same few, plain shirts. 

“Yeah, not exactly my thing,” he said, taking another sip. “Do you go to school?” he asked, not looking entirely genuine, you thought maybe he felt obligated to talk to the host of the party. 

“Yeah! Should have graduated last May, but I’ll be done next semester,” You said, feeling a bit ashamed but hoping your face didn’t betray you. Suddenly, a loud cheer exploded from the pong table. Looking behind you, the game looked neck and neck, Torres and Patty having two cups and Nancy and Jonathon having three left. It was obvious Jonathon had no idea what he was doing and Nancy was making all the shots, but still, they were quite cute. You hoped they would last, summer romances were hard to translate into the real world. 

“Really? Why?” he asked, looking entirely shocked, drawing your attention back from the game of pong, “You’re literally the smartest person I know. Are you studying a million things at once?”

“Please, I am not the smartest person you know, you hardly know me,” you shook your head vigorously, “just, you know…do you go to school?” you pivoted, desperate to get yourself out of the spotlight. 

Catching the hint, he nods, “Yeah starting my first year at Indiana,” he said, sounding just as ashamed as you did. “I feel like a… like a weirdo, going to college so late but I didn’t have the grades for the longest time and I honestly had no idea what I wanted to do. Still don’t,” he said, running a hand through his hair. 

“That’s not weird at all. That’s honestly really smart. I really wish I did that. That’s why I’m taking an extra semester. I was so stuck on keeping everyone happy and wanting to make my parents proud that I studied a totally soulless profession that I don’t even care about,” you rambled, surprising yourself with the vulnerability. You don’t even know him, why are you word vomiting so hard right now?

“I wish I had taken a year or two to figure out what I want to do, not what my family wants, not what's expected of me,” you finished, not making eye contact with Steve. 

“What do you want to do?” Steve asked, sounding genuinely interested. 

“I want to teach,” you grinned just thinking about it, “I just love working with kids so much. Not to sound super mushy but… camp has changed my life, it basically saved my life, and it’s made me realize that these relationships are the ones I will cherish forever. The trust you build with your campers is a connection unlike any other and watching them grow in the short time we have them…it’s more rewarding than anything else. I want to do that forever. Camp is so unlike anything I’ve ever done,” you looked over at Steve as you spoke, his eyes were wide and he had a small smile on his face. 

Steve leaned forward a bit, “What do you mean camp changed your life?”

Now was the moment to decide just how vulnerable you wanted to be with Steve. Maybe you just really needed to talk about your feelings or maybe he was just, really easy to talk to. You took a breath, “I came back to camp because I was really unhappy. My major was totally depressing me because I hated the work so much. Coming here really set me on a good direction for life. I was doing things and hanging around people who were bad for me. Being back here makes me realize I don’t need to do those things for friends. Or to be cool. I’m cool without all that other bullshit. You think I’m cool right?” you said, grinning and attempting to relieve the tension of your admission.

“Oh definitely,” he grinned, “all the coolest people I know wear full monochrome outfits on a random Tuesday, start rap battles with condiment bottles, and wear garbage bag ponchos, just so one of your campers wouldn’t feel embarrassed,” Steve laughed as he thought of you this past week, garbage bag poncho over green socks, green shirt, and green pants. He’s not even sure if you’re aware you do that, “I’ve never seen anyone pull off those things like you do. You’ll be a great teacher,” he said genuinely and then took a shallow breath, “My parents told me they’d kill me if I ever became a teacher, so that’s really admirable.”

“What? Why?” you said, still reeling a little from what Steve said. You didn’t think anyone even noticed those things about you, much less Steve, someone you’ve hardly spoken with this entire time. 

“Because it doesn’t make any money,” he looked away, “My parents…my dad… have these sky high expectations for me. I don’t even really know him. He's been pressuring me for years to go to college, study business or something ‘useful’, meet a girl, get married, and all that bullshit,” he spat out, “But it never felt right. I guess that’s kind of why I’m here. Trying something new, trying to find myself, a little,” he said, getting quieter and then, “I don’t think my parents even like me. They’ve never said it but I’m pretty sure they think I’m a failure. My entire life they’ve pushed this- this agenda on me while being states away, working, constantly. Hard to parent when you’re halfway across the country and forget to call,” he said, staring into the fire and taking an aggressive drink of his water, probably wishing it was something stronger. 

You were quiet for a moment and spared a glance into your parents house. Your parents were wonderful, but you were the first of your family to ever go to college and they had no idea the pressure they were putting on you. Your parents were constantly working while growing up so they could provide you the opportunity to go to college. But still, you feel like you hardly know them, “I get that,” you said slowly, “My parents love me, but they don’t know me. They’re so afraid of me becoming like them they tried to force me to become a- a lawyer,” your face twisted at the thought of it, “because all the best lawyers let kids dye their hair blue with Kool-Aid.” You laughed, looking at Steve from the corner of your eye. You felt so comfortable sharing these things with him, but you’re not too sure why. You’re not even friends. Maybe it was the firelight or his big, brown eyes enticing you to spill your guts. Maybe you were just drunk. 

“You’re not a failure, by the way,” you said gently, Steve was still looking at the fire. “I think you did it the smart way,, the right way, if there's even such a thing. Whatever you decide to do you’ll be great at it, but don’t do what I did. Don’t try to study something your heart is truly not invested in, that’s how you fail classes, flunk out.” you said, knowingly.

He smiled bitterly, “I guess we’re two sides of the same coin huh?” but the bitterness melted into a real smile as he looked at you. 

“Yeah,” you said, reaching out to grab his hand gently, “you know, I go to Indiana too. If you want, when you get there, I can show you the ropes. All the best routes, best places to eat, good professors, all that stuff.” you spoke, hoping to not sound too eager. 

“Really? Would you?” He raised his eyebrows, holding your hand tighter.

“Of course Harrington, I love taking a little freshman under my wings,” I winked at him. 

“I am not little,” Steve said leaning in a little more, he looked like he wanted to stay more but then-

“Come on Sunshine, can’t sit by the fire all night! You’re my pong partner!” Eddie yelled from the table, “We play winners,” he gestured to Nancy and Jonathon, who were looking between you and Steve, and your hands held together. 

You abruptly pulled your hand out from his and practically jumped out of your seat. “Don’t have to ask me twice!” and quickly walked over to Eddie’s side. He tossed his arm over your shoulder and you snuck a glance at Steve. Steve was looking at the ground and gave a curt nod to no one in particular, and spun back around to stare into the fire. You felt sick to your stomach for a moment, regretting leaving the warmth of the fire, the warmth of his… 

You blinked hard and looked up at Eddie, who was holding out the other pong ball, “You ready to play?”

___

The sun shone through the windows of the tent you and your coworkers slept in that night, sleeping bags squished together, head to toe and stuffed like sardines. The room was hot with the morning sun beating down, the down in your sleeping bag doing its job, and the heat of a dozen young adults in one room combined with your own hangover was making you nauseous. As quietly as you could manage, you stumbled out of the tent. Immediately, you notice in your driveway that Robin’s car is gone. You glance back in the tent and see most of Southside is gone including Steve. You ignored the slight drop in your heart when you realized he was gone. It wasn’t even 8 am, Robin really needed to get back I guess. You wished you could have spoken to Steve a little more. It was so…refreshing to speak to someone so freely, without judgement. Or was that all in your head, spurred on by the drinks in your hand? You couldn’t be sure anymore, the memory of last night becoming a bit hazy after leaving Steve by the fire. 

You padded across your front lawn barefoot (where were your sandals?) into your parents house. Expecting a morning full of cleaning, you were shocked at the site of your parents home. The destruction of last night was stuffed into garbage bags, plates were in the dishwasher, and your couch, with a million different pillows and blankets, was straightened up. You gasped, seeing how clean it was, and making a mental note to thank whoever did this. You double checked that everything was clean and started up the dishwasher. You walked into your childhood bedroom and coat room to organize everyone’s things to make their departure a little easier and reduce the chances of someone leaving their things. As you entered you saw a note on your bed, scrawled quickly in the glitter pen that sat on your desk. It read:

Thanks for the party. I’m really glad we talked. It meant a lot. Hope I put everything away in the right spot -Steve

You put your hand flew to cover your mouth. How… kind of him. You figured maybe Robin or Patty had cleaned up, but Steve? You’ve seen him clean on Fridays; your first week you had to show him how to hold a broom and mop properly. There was no way he did this on his own. 

You thought back on your conversation last night, forcing your brain to conjure back up the moment, regardless of the headache that was forming. You thought of the warmth of the bonfire and the callous feel of his finger tips, and the genuine look in his eyes when he called you ‘the coolest’. A giddy feeling entered your body, a new friend! Especially to make a friend with someone as standoffish as Steve, this felt like quite the accomplishment. You vowed to seek him out this weekend before camp starts and thank him. Your excitement grew over the prospect of being able to build and share memories with another person, your chest beating quickly just thinking about it. You wondered what traditions he knew of and which ones he didn't. Like, has he ever stargazed on the roof of the Nature Center? Swam to the water trampoline and spend the night? You put the note in your pajama pocket, your face growing warm at the thought of hanging out with Steve. You practically skipped out of your house and began to count down the hours until you were back at camp again. 

[ilikekidsshows]

ml dragging on forever and ta's intent to keep it going for as long as possible (if im remembering that correctly, sounds like something he'd say) means the show is going to keep highlighting the writing failures. years into the future and no progress? marinette's a shitty ladybug despite all the hype she gets from her yes men (who might be just as trapped as alix tbh considering that if she needs all 18+ heroes, they can't leave paris until they get the butterfly, which sounds like it's gonna be never). the butterfly won't be used for heroism in the main continuity. the idea of lila as the butterfly in the future sucks because she's always been such a nobody character. she's still a nobody character even now as the new big bad. if it's a different butterfly villain it means marinette failed to get it back again which further shows she sucks as a hero. there's nothing they can do that can make any of it good without making some other part of the story worse.

---

Remember how the London Special had lines that were basically the writers bragging about how good they are at keeping their formula interesting and how it just requires them to change things up every once in a while? If that's true, then why is Marinette still doing the same stupid things, just escalated? All that's changed is that the circumstances around her have actually lowered the stakes.

They're basically escalating the wrong things. Marinette has gone from sabotaging a game show to hurt Kagami's chances with Adrien and breaking into her phone to check if she's been in contact with Adrien to following Adrien's new friend around, faking an Akumatization to avoid facing consequences for that and (unintentionally) breaking said girl’s prosthetics as a result of that. Yet, the stakes motivating Marinette have fallen so low they are nonexistent. Adrien is no longer the crush she feels she has little chance with, he has become her insanely doting boyfriend. Anyone thinking he’d dump her just because of Sublime is the actual joke of the episode instead of the cringe comedy that got stale five years ago.

Similarly, the new Butterfly is supposed to be bigger and badder because of how mysterious “they” are, but they’ve already shown us it's Lila, so the audience is aware that the heroes are treating a teenaged girl with limited resources as a bigger threat than the fully grown rich man all the while they have a whole team of superpowered allies. We're once again at the point that made the audience think Gabriel getting the Miraculous in the S4 finale was a good thing: the heroes have so much manpower, magical power and resources that them not winning instantly every time just makes them look incompetent at utilizing it all, which is a bad thing when your protagonist’s claim to fame is her superior planning ability.

Considering how the show has “progressed” so far, I can hardly wait for season 10 where Manon is the new Butterfly holder and Marinette has a whole two Miracle Boxes’ worth of Miraculous to combat this unbeatable toddler with. And she'll still be making even less progress than she is now.

I can just see the average episode now. Adrien makes a new friend, who happens to be, wait for it, a super competent girl, and Marinette feels insecure in her relationship with Adrien, despite them being engaged. In her jealousy, I mean, concern over making sure this girl isn't a spy for the new Butterfly, Marinette ends up poisoning her on purpose, but only because she thought she was evil! And the girl survives and thinks the poisoned cookies tasted great and asks Marinette for the recipe!

Also, Adrien proposed with his Amok but the fans insist it's totally okay because the writers said on twitter that you can't give unintentional commands with the Amoks and Marinette can be trusted to not give them on purpose. They all ignore how there’s also an episode where they introduce a new family member for Adrien who’s manipulating him and, instead of talking about it with Adrien, because having that kind of conversation is so uncomfortable, Marinette orders him to “stand up for himself” or other such rot, and the stans insist this total disregard of Adrien as a thinking, feeling human being is okay because it was to help Adrien and besides, it wasn't a real command because the episode left it unclear if Marinette used the ring or not.

I know what I'm risking by typing this all out, because this show has a track record of doing the exact thing I describe as the worst-case-scenario, but, maybe, in another ten years, when season 10 is actually airing, we’ll be able to laugh at how stupidly, predictably awful this show is.

[gars-weaponeer]

Today in: Clones Characters that deserved better!

Issue #2

-CID-

No it's not a joke- HEAR ME OUT!

First of all- I'm not gonna sit here and say that Cid was a good character and she doesn't deserve all the hate.

She is a horrible person and she totally sucks-

What I mean is that I feel like she was cut short and her story was not finished. This is not unusual with the Bad batch enemies and antagonists that are not cameos. Hemlock also suffering from this "half written" desease. The only one I think had a full arc and a satisfactory-ish end was Rampant but that's another story.

Cid in particularly resonates with me cause the old lizard has a very interesting design. She is a trandoshan and she is the first of her kind that we ever see being both female ( i think) and elder. Most of the other Trandoshans we have seen in the movies, videogames and series are mostly adult males. She is also an ally at first, which is also weird for a Trandoshan, being usually the go-to when writers need a "enemy alien". And sure, this could be read as she already being an antagonist from the beginning- But I never liked star war's trend of having a certain species being "the evil species." So having a trandoshan ally was something that I was excited about!

I wanna see more Trandoshan allies and more Wookie villains.

Sure, when we first meet her she is not the best person, making it clear to us that she cares more about money than making friends with the batch. Their relationship is strictly business like- However the more we see her during season one the more we see her connect with the batch. Specially with Omega.

Sure- She connects with Omega cause she notices Omega can be useful to her. But it's thanks to Cid that Hunter and the rest start to treat Omega as a member of the team, rather than a charge they need to take care of. She has also given her a few tips on how to use the bow that have helped Omega in the long run.

It almost seemed like Cid's arc was to eventually warm up to the Batch, they seemed to work well together and even ally well when time required it... so by the end of season one I was convinced this would be her path.

Then, season two episode 4: Faster, came along and I noticed something weird...

While some of us were drooling over Tech's masterful abilities in the racing track(me included)- I began to notice on the re-runs that there was a certain character development in Cid.

She seemed to really want to change, to become a better person from who she used to be. (btw, we never learn more about her past- which is not a bad thing, but it also adds to her missing pieces.) She wants to prove to Millegi that she is not the ruthless, spineless, money-driven tradoshan she once was and we see that determination in her face, for a moment.

This was the first and only time that we have been shown Cid to be vulnerable. Really vulnerable. And I find it strange for a character that we were supposed to "hate" in the end, to have a whole episode where we see her vulnerable side. Which kind of tip me off that Cid had more story to her that was inevitable cut down by the studio deciding to cut the series short.

At the same time, on the same episode, we have Millegi's warning about Cid. Something that is meant to be forshadowing. So by the end of Faster, we got this information:

-Cid is not a good person and she never was, so the bad batch is right for not fully trusting her. -But Cid wants to change, or at least wants to convince herself that she has/can changed. -However, she might have trouble in the future failing to not fall into old habits.

However... this was pretty much the last episode where Cid was relevant at all.

We don't see her again until 5 episodes later, in Crossing/Retrieval. Where the Batch call's Cid for Help and she just leaves them on read.

How.... did we pass from Cid having character development to she just straight abandoning the Batch with little explanation other than "This is more trouble than it's worth"?

And THEN- when we see her again is already at the end of the season, on episode 16- Plan 99. Where Cid has a conversation with Wrecker and she reveals to them that she *had* to sell them out.

But instead of sounding condescending or proud of selling them off. Being all like: "I told you what would happen if you crossed me!" or something like that. You know... showing us that she really didn't care to sell the bad batch to Hemlock, we see her reluctant and even regretful.

Like she really, really, didn't had a choice. Like she really, really, didn't wanted to do so.

But she did- Because in the end, she is still that old Cid.

She decided that looking after herself, going down her old habits, was better than risking her skin for them.

And YEAH WHAT A BITCH- But it still feels... weird.

Like I'm not being told the whole context.

After this episode we never see Cid again, she is mentioned and somewhat implied that she was tortured or killed by CX-2 but she kind of just fizzles out... And it feels wrong, seeing how she was an important member of the cast during season 1.

I'M NOT GONNA LIE-

I was *convinced* that Phee was going to be the evil one.

Phee suffers from the "Disney girl boss" fever and she is too perfect for her own good, which is another rant for another ocasión. - So I was sure that she would double cross the Bad batch. She couldn't be that perfect... right?

She would appear being all cool, and having Omega look up to her and the batch trusting her easily by how cool she is- only for her to turn on them cause she is a pirate.

All for the batch to realize they were better off with Cid.

A classic "not everything that shines is gold" kind of stuff. But obviously that is not what happened. Uu

So here is my take on what I think Cid's arc was supposed to be.

We have two paths: the Good end and the bad end.

-BAD END-

Cid would connect back with the batch. Apologizing for not offering help with some excuse like "The empire was on my back" or something like that. Trying to sell the story that she was looking out for them.

We would have more situations where the Batch start trusting Cid again, but Phee is the one that warns them not to keep playing her games. That maybe they should finally break ties with her.

Before they can do that, plan 99 doesn't happens and the Batch hurries to take refuge with Cid. This time they "trust" her enough to believe that they would be safe.

Only to then be revealed that Cid sold them out for a huge amount of money. Cid would be shown to be unapologetic, saying something like "It's nothing personal, it's just business."

Then we either never see her again, Or we would see her demise via greed on another episode. Maybe tied with the Durand for it to be more poetic.

Cid would be a character we would all hate for being a total bitch- but we would have more context and more flavor to her betrayal.

Full on villain mode.

-GOOD END-

Cid get's a redemption arc in this one.

Things would go normally. But it would be remarked that Cid silence was unusual.

After Cid's betrayal and Omega being taken away, we would later on see Cid finding Hunter and Wrecker again.

Hunter and Wrecker are upset with her- obviously, But Cid begs for them to give her a chance to explain herself.

She tells them that she went radio silent cause the Empire had arrived on Ord Mantel and that Hemlock made her a deal she could not refuse.

She did not wanted to sell the batch, but she had no choice. It was them or her.

This would Upset Hunter, which would probably say something like : "Omega trusted you."

This would hit Cid hard, since we were already shown that she and Omega had a little connection.

Cid would then admit that she was a coward and that she fell back into her old habits out of fear, but would decide to offer her help freely to Hunter and Wrecker as she owns Omega that much.

With Cid's help as an information matrix, we would see Hunter and Wrecker keep looking. Cid giving them tips and bits of information that could be useful for them to complete missions.

It would be thanks to Cid that they receive Omega's message and that they are finally reunited.

After that, Cid would continue to help them locate Tantiss. Cid stays on Ord Mantel, trying to act unconscious as to not bring the attention of the rest of the batch in Pabu.

However she is confronted by CX-2, (who is obviously Tech, I'll die on this HILL!), This time Cid would refuse to her her old habits get the better of her, and she would try to fight him off with her wits.

She would try to trap him on the old mines under, and when she thinks she has bested him, she would ultimately be killed.

Just as she is about to die, Cid takes out a detonator and destroys the cantina and all the information CX-2 could get from the Bad Batch. Honoring her word for once and completing her redemption arc.

This of course is just my opinion and speculation.

I could be reading way too much into this and Cid was never actually supposed to be that deep.

But either way, I just wanted to share these thoughts, as they keep me up at nights sometimes.

Overall, the end is still the same: The Bad Batch ended too early and lots of characters suffered for it.

They deserved better.

[rervraiilstew]

THEORY: Abilities, The Fourth Dimension, and Gozen.

A small preface! Several points in this you could probably start throwing rocks at me and say that I'm reaching too hard and/or thinking about this too deeply and/or that I'm wrong. Most of the way through this I’ve felt like I’ve put on a tinfoil hat and have flown off the rails and phased through onto the other face of the flat earth(/j).  

-----

The main focus of this entire theory is that abilities are directly related to the fourth dimension.  

Abilities And the Natural Laws They Break: 

Facts to note: 

The fourth dimension is time. 

Several abilities deal with time, space, and/or matter (and gravity if you want to count that.) 

And some examples of those abilities are: 

Space abilities: 

“Space related abilities” refer to abilities that affect a space or create a space that goes against existing 3rd dimensional constraints—length, width, height—either in intercepting a space or creating its own space. For example (and one of the best examples of this), Lucy. 

(BSD Chapter 15, ~ Page 36)

Other space ability users include: Rimbaud, Poe, Louisa, Nikolai, Kunikida, Akutagawa, and Tanizaki. Some more so than others (Lucy, Poe, Tanizaki, Akutagawa). For some it only loosely applies or needs some justification/explanation for it to apply (Kunikida, Louisa). The best examples by FAR are Lucy and Poe. 

Time abilities: 

“Time related abilities” refer to abilities that break normal laws of time. I.e. by slowing it down/stopping it, repeating it, speeding it up, etc. Some ability users have abilities that deal with both space and time (again, prime example being Lucy ) usually by having an ability that creates or inhabits its own space with its own time.

Other time ability users include: Louisa, the Meursault cat-girl, Oda, and POSSIBLY Teruko depending on how you look at it. 

Matter abilities: 

“Matter related abilities” refer to a LOT of abilities in bsd. Any ability that allows someone to shapeshift, create something, destroy something, or change something is matter related. A lot of these abilities likely even go against the law of conservational mass; however, they might not if given the correct explanation. 

For example: Akutagawa. You could argue the matter is not being created with his ability(though it's unlikely) and that the extensions from his coat are still the same mass as the part of the coat it’s from. This could be achieved by Rashomon becoming less dense and more fluid in relation of how far away it’s stretched from Akutagawa’s coat. And because his ability is said to be able to cut through space itself, that would also count as a space related ability. 

And for an example of an ability that most definitely breaks the law of conservation of mass, is Thou Shalt Not Die. Sense her ability can heal things like lost limbs, blood loss (S1 Tanizaki, S4 Kenji), etc., matter must be created for her ability to work. You could not give an explanation like Akutagawa’s, because her ability results in injuries being fully healed and that part of the body remaining functional.  

Other matter ability users include: Atsushi, Kyouka, Kouyou, Fyodor, Pushkin, Ivan, Shibusawa, Natsume, Mushitaro, Tetcho, Melville, Jouno, Steinbeck, Mori, Lovecraft, and Teruko (again, depending on how you look at it). 

Teruko’s ability: 

Teruko’s ability could be argued to either be a matter ability, or a matter AND time ability. On one hand, it could be taking the actual previous and future ages of the person she’s using her ability on (kind of like Mirai from TBHK iirc). In this case, it would be a time and matter related ability. On the other hand, it could just be changing the person’s physical appearance and anatomy based on factors unrelated to the actual “keyframes” past or future of that person's life. In this case, it would only be a matter related ability. 

-----

How Abilities Work:

Abilities are, as previously stated, directly related to the fourth dimension. That's what gives them the ability to manipulate 4th Dimensional and 3rd Dimensional elements like time, space, and matter.

Each ability is it's own very niche gateway to interacting with and breaking basic structures and laws of the third and/or fourth dimension.

-----

Dazai and Gozen:

Gozen:

Quick circle back to Fyodor: 

What confused me for so long about his plan is why is he wanting to manually kill off/start war against all ability users instead of using the page(<- probably dysfunctional) to get rid of abilities? If he truly wants to purge the world of “sin” (abilities) then why kill the people who didn’t even choose to have an ability (/who didn’t choose to be exploited by the government)? Why not get rid of the problem itself: abilities?  

And a possibility is that ability users would die without their abilities. If he simply writes abilities themselves out of existence and ends up getting all ability users killed, then to him it would've essentially been like killing a ton of innocent people. He's antagonizing them for his own sake as well as for his plan to group everyone together through a common enemy/fear.

And then there’s how the deaths from Gozen’s sword are portrayed. 

Which circles to “why the bubbles?” For one, it's a way for the death to be more easily communicated to the reader. Simply drawing a character just lying in a puddle of their own blood can be easily misinterpreted as them simply being heavily injured but not dead yet. The bubbles are a stylistic choice to show that there’s a difference in the nature of deaths caused by Gozen compared to any other way of dying. 

The “death” that Gozen gives to whoever he kills is not essentially just death itself. The heart doesn’t stop, the body doesn’t die, and the brain is still intact up until it gets turned into bubbles. 

Gozen severs the connection between the ability user and their ability. And given that: 

Gozen is a fourth dimensional being 

Fukuchi’s ability  

Fyodor’s objective to kill ability users + his control over Gozen’s actions(and therefore how Gozen interacts with the 4th dimension) 

Gozen is perfectly capable of severing the ability-ability user connection. With access to the fourth dimension, the strength (Fukuchi’s ability) to cut that connection, and the will and instructions (Fyodor) to do it, it could be possible that that’s how Gozen is killing off ability users. 

(BSD Chapter 115, ~ Page 30)

Dazai:

Given how abilities work, I propose that Dazai's ability can be summed up as being like an enzyme inhibitor but for abilities.

And Gozen's killing mechanism and Dazai's ability are really fucking similar. Gozen permanently severs the ability, whereas Dazai temporarily inhibits the ability.

However one piece of evidence I can provide is that Dazai's ability relies on him DIRECTLY touching the ability user or the physical mass of the ability. His ability places a temporary blocker to stop the connection between the ability user and their ability, which requires that either the physical manifestation of the ability or the ability user's body is touched so that the blocker can actually have an affect and therefore nullify the ability. And this is why Dazai's ability does no harm to the ability user, but Gozen's does.

Dazai's ability never permanently harms or changes the connection between an ability and ability user. Gozen's, however, does.

And this whole theory arguably makes Fyozai even gayer. What do you mean that you ensured that the killing mechanism of the divine being you smushed together is just an amplified version of your ex's ability?? gayass.

(small little addition to this theory)

 

TLDR: Abilities operate in the fourth dimension. Gozen kills by severing the connection between an ability user(3rd dimension) and their ability (4th dimension). Dazai’s ability(temporarily blocks the connection between an ability user and their ability, kind of like an enzyme inhibitor) is a toned-down version of Gozen’s killing mechanism. 

[monstersinthecosmos]

Since you don't see Marius and Armand as having a lot to gain from a relationship with each other in the current era, I'm curious as to how you headcannon them with Daniel? And what do you think the best possible version of their relationship could be in the future for all three of them in their respective groups?

Dasdg I want to like, clarify that, I THINK NOT HAVING A LOT TO GAIN is not exactly what I mean. I know I’ve said things along those lines but fandom softened me a little bit. I think what I mean more is like, the thing they have to gain is the investment of time, and I wonder if this is something that will take years/decades/centuries to build and heal. The thing they have to gain is the baby steps, the clearing of the path!, so that they can get somewhere again!

I think the relationship is something like this:

The strange thing too is that like, we’re now getting like, seven years off of canon !! SO WHEN WE SAY CURRENT ERA PART OF ME THINKS “WHEN THE BOOK ENDS” but then I’m also wondering, how much do they get done in 7 years. This is interesting to think about. Because me thinking that they’re not in a great place by the end of canon doesn’t necessarily mean that they can’t get there eventually! I wonder what those dingdongs are doing out there in the ether!  

I really think Daniel could be very useful for this, as well! Like as a mediator! NOT JUST AS A PERSON BETWEEN THEM WHO KNOWS THINGS ABOUT EACH THAT THEY MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT EACH OTHER, BUT AS A MORE MODERN MAN WHO MIGHT HAVE A BETTER GRASP ON PSYCHOLOGY.

So like the short answer your question is that I think he’s maybe their marriage counselor LOL. He’s someone who can read people very well and spent a lot of time with Armand, even before the barrier was an issue, so I think he can read Armand very well even without it! And he can mimd gift with Marius to understand the subtext when Marius is being cagey about his true feelings, or when he’s speaking abrasively/condescendingly as a defense mechanism!

Since you’re asking about headcanons I’m gonna be indulgent here and talk strictly headcanons and how I personally imagine it so don’t take anything else I’m about to say as canon in anyway way, since we literally get ZERO information about the 3 of them together in the books—

I wonder like in what ways does Daniel being between them resembles a child and their parents, maybe even more accurately a child of divorced parents. And the family structure is abstract here obviously, but so is the polycule structure and the way it’s complicated by the Mind Gift barrier and how it puts Marius and Daniel at an advantage when it comes to communication. It kinda leaves Armand out in the cold to never be understood lol but Marius can be so contradictory sometimes that I wonder if it does them good for Daniel to able to translate when it’s needed.

AND LIKE THEIR RELATIONSHIPS TO EACH OTHER ARE SO DEEP ??? As much as Daniel might help as a balm between the two of them, I think he and Marius can also ground the three of them in a nice way. NOT SURE HOW ELSE TO INTRODUCE THIS OTHER VISUAL AID SO HERE -

I have some headcanons about Daniel’s backstory and what his home life was like and so that kinda plays into headcanons about the current day, too. Like, I pictured him having unhappily married parents who were too squeamish for a divorce, partly because I’m projecting LMAO and partly because divorce was a little less common then. There WERE divorces, even Anne Rice’s parents were divorced!, but I wonder about what it does to you, when your parents stay together “for the kids” and wind up making it worse. (I say I wonder, but, I know very well how it feels lol.)

Like how much does Daniel as the mediator come out of a need to break a family cycle?

I think it’s a trap people fall into when we try to break cycles, or try not to be like our parents; sometimes you think you’re safe because you changed your situation drastically and yet we still always wind up confronted by things we need to unlearn. So Daniel might think he’s left the realm of the family cycle by removing himself completely from humanity, except now he’s in the center of this very fraught chasm and has to rely on his human experience again.

Daniel is such a very blank slate in canon that it’s so hard to know, like even after he’s better again we don’t see him interact with Armand, so honestly like it can be whatever you want it to be, but I like the idea of him being a mediator.

I think he has seen the best and worst of them both, and I think he can see the way they miscommunicate. Even with the barrier with Armand I just think like, he’s Armand’s ONLY fledgling like they know each other SO well. I think Daniel can just read him anyway, in a way that Marius can’t, because Marius knew Armand when he was so young and naïve and Marius was so stressed.

And even though Daniel is WAY younger than both of them, all three of them have been through some very life changing experiences since the 1980s when Daniel was turned! Like Marius needing to re-evaluate his entire life & purpose & identity without TWMBK to take care of, and Armand having such a massive religious relapse that he attempted suicide, and Daniel’s psychological overwhelmed and subsequent recovery! 

In some ways, all three of them are new people who are in the process of building their new lives and understand their new identities, so in a way it’s sort of a blank slate that they can work from. 

So the question, what does it look like ?

I’m not really sure!

I think there’s the sort of like vaguely polyamorous nature of VC vampires along with their patience for eternity — for example, the relationship we see between Lestat - Louis - Armand is that Louis is able to come and go from Trinity Gate as needed. We know that Daniel went back to New York with Armand in PLROA, but there no indiction that he’ll never come back to Marius again, or if it’s just a visit, or what it was. Like perhaps Daniel will also get in the habit of coming and going from Trinity Gate as needed, we can’t know. 

LIKE THANKS ANNE FOR FUCKING FORGETTING DANIEL EXISTED DURING BCTU LMAOOO cause like, does he comes to Marius’s side when Marius is in criss? Apparently not LMAO. Did he stay home in NY to babysit Benji & Sybelle while ARMAND came Marius’s side? Gosh idk man. 

I like that canon tells us that the vampires are sort of relaxed and secure in their relationships when it comes to stuff like this (it’s something I REALLY deeply fucking hate about the show sorry lol) so I think I kinda enjoy thinking that there’s a version where they can come and go and be there for each other without being codependent. I like to think that Marius & Daniel have a home in France for when they needed space away from Court, and we know that Marius has a lair in Trinity Gate. 

At the end of BCtu Armand is like freshly traumatized and probably need some comfort, and Marius wants to go talk to him, and I think that’s a great sign that they’re ready to start talking to each other again. It might take years or decades or centuries for them to get somewhere healthy because they have a LOT to talk about, but I like the idea that they can have an open line of communication! And I like that maybe Daniel can be there to mediate! And they don’t have to a always be around each other all the time, but don’t get jealous when the other two are spending time together, and maybe sometimes they hang out and hunt together or go catch a show or go to Carnival or go fuck off into the mountains to stargaze, who knows what all they get into! 

But I like thinking that when canon ends they’re in a place where they can start working towards that!!!!!

[punchitmrsulu]

Since Cobra Kai ended I find myself getting more and more excited for Karate Kid Legends.

I absolutely loved Cobra Kai in the beginning, especially the first 2 seasons.

Season 3 was still good but it’s where the cracks started to show, however, I was able to overlook them because it gave us a pretty phenomenal finale with a lot of promise for the future.

Seasons 4 and 5 did not live up to that promise AT ALL and were quite a chore to get through. It was all just a big mess that almost made me give up on the show. But there was just one more season left so it was just like, “I’ve gotten this far, might as well go all the way.”

Although I had problems with the last season, the pros outweighed the cons for me and I did thoroughly love the ending.

Having said all that, it always bothered me that they turned Daniel into a car dealership owner. That never seemed like something he would do really. It never seemed like something he would thrive in and be happy doing. Daniel always liked helping people and he was good at that. Selling fancy cars to rich assholes, that whole businessman deal just doesn’t fit him at all.

Which is why it was so uncomfortable to see him in those awful suits they always had him in, and why it was so refreshing when he was out of them and in more relaxed, laid back outfits. Ralph’s demeanor even changed. He just seemed more confident and sure of himself.

And it bothered be that he was often portrayed as a rich asshole himself. Over the past few years I’ve found myself having to defend him quite a lot and it seems to have become commonplace to hate him, which just speaks to how poorly he was being written.

They still could have had him be successful and financially prosperous but just doing something else. He could have even still been in the car business just, I don’t know, renovating old cars or something.

Doing anything that would require creating something new really and where he would be in a position to pass on knowledge. It’s hard for me to believe Daniel wouldn’t want to do something where he could help others thrive in some way.

I enjoy Cobra Kai for what it is but they far too often made it seem like Daniel’s trauma was his fault and that he had also injured Johnny and needed to make amends. I can’t tell you how much it bothered me when they brought Ali into the picture just to have her make the point that both Daniel and Johnny had their fair share of blame for what happened in the past.

No. Just no. The only person who was completely blameless in that entire situation was Daniel.

Karate Kid Legends seems like it’s going to show him the respect he deserves given everything he went through and present him as the mentor he would have probably become.

The trailer has him looking fierce, incredibly skilled and wise. We had two shots of Daniel fighting and already he looked like a force to be reckoned with. What little we saw of the fighting in general already has it miles ahead of anything we’ve seen in 6 seasons of Cobra Kai. Everything just looks fake and cheap in the latter by comparison.

It seems like it was beautifully shot and there was just a weight to everything that I’m very excited for and that was never present in Cobra Kai or the original movies if I’m being honest.

It looks like they decided to take everything that worked in the OG movies and elevate it.

It could be that it was just a very well put together trailer and the actual movie won’t live up to it at all but here’s hoping that it does and that it gives us the Daniel we deserve, and that it hopefully prevails over CK in people's consciousness.

Here’s hoping it’s as awesome as it looks and that it’s an absolute hit!