#even couples therapy can’t save them

[everlusts]

thinking about how their bond transcends time, space, and destiny—soulmates tethered to each other. except they’re also walking two different paths that cannot overlap, always standing on opposite sides. but she still craves him, because he made her feel so deeply the way she hasn’t felt in centuries. the love she feels for him isn’t just tainted by the knowledge of his true identity; it’s torn apart by the fact that, even now, she still sees halbrand within him and she can only live in constant denial. maybe he sees the darkness lying dormant within her, the unspoken desires she barely acknowledges herself—and it terrifies her that he, of all people, is the one who understands them

and then he’s this fucked up lunatic. meets her when he’s been stripped of everything. he’s so drawn to her and it’s suddenly a romcom filled with crazy sexual tension she is the one person who could have pulled him from the shadows, the reflection of what he might have been in another life—someone who drew him toward the light. but that is still never quite enough to make him leave the darkness behind

she forever chooses good. he is entrenched in his depravity. and yet they both live haunted by this choice of never experiencing again what they felt in those few moments when he was just halbrand and she was just galadriel. just them on the raft. this ‘love’ festers like a wound that will never heal, reminding them of what could have been but never will be

now every time they face each other they’re faced with feelings that neither of them expected to develop and it’s a sore point for both and they can’t erase that intimacy and they’re both frustrated because why not

& for him it has turned into if you can’t have me in your heart the way i desire then i will have you in the only twisted way i know how to which. wow. woah.

[fallstaticexit]

Prev / Next / Beginning

TW: Conversion "Therapy" Mention / Homophobia

AN: Sorry this one took a while! - longer than I'd like away!. Coming back from a mini vaca and getting back into work and routine is a nightmare, also my delicate sleep schedule is ruineddd. Anywho, we should be back in business now! :) now, DJ play Good Luck, Babe by Chappell Roan!

Transcript under the cut

Geoffrey: Great job, bud! Tree is looking great!

Malcolm: It’s because I’m a decorator like mommy.

Jonathan: Mom, are you leaving? We’re supposed to decorate the tree too.

Nancy: Save a few ornaments for me to put on there, darling. Mommy has to step out for a couple hours.

Geoffrey: Johnny’s right, you know. Decorating it is apart of the deal.

Nancy: Can’t you spare me an hour or two?

Geoffrey: Remember what I said about being there?

Nancy: That’s not fair. I’ve been doing better, haven’t I? I left work early, which I’m hardly ever able to do and we found the tree together. I haven’t seen Vanessa in 16 years, Geoffrey. This is important to me.

Geoffrey: Yeah, well, this is pretty important to them.

Nancy: Please don’t make me feel guilty about this.

Geoffrey: It’s just you and Vanessa, right?

Nancy: [frowns] Yes, of course. I’ll be back, ok?

-

Vanessa: I’m glad you came.

Nancy: I wouldn’t have miss this for the world.

Vanessa: You look so beautiful tonight.

Nancy: [blushes] So do you. You’ve always have.

Vanessa: [smiles] I wasn’t sure on your choice of champagne, so I hope you don’t mind we have mine. I guess it’s one of the many things we’ll have to learn about each other.

Nancy: This is perfect. I’m sure I’ll love anything you like.

Nancy Narrates: [I found myself unable to eat. Instead, I got my fill of her. I studied her, consumed the sight of her with greedy, curious eyes]

Nancy Narrates: [It thrilled and frightened me the way she took me in too, as if she was trying to recall all those precious details that may have gotten lost in time. Seeing all the ways I could have changed and stayed the same]

Nancy Narrates: [One thing was for certain: my heart still raced the moment our fingers found one another, just like when we were girls. It was a delicate and familiar touch that I could feel from inside, and it was almost as if no time had passed at all]

Vanessa: [softly] Nancy, Nancy, Nancy, the woman you’ve become. I’ve thought of you, over time, what kind of woman you grew up to be.

Nancy: Is it what you expected?

Vanessa: Successful? Powerful? Stunning? Yes, I like to think so.

Nancy: I’ve thought of you too.

Vanessa: Yeah?

Nancy: I thought about what you did, after high school. Who you became. If you fell in love. If you thought about me too. Feels good, knowing you did.

Vanessa: I think holding on to the version of you I remembered kept me sane, after all this time. Do you mind if I smoke? Helps my nerves.

Nancy: As long as I can bum one.

Vanessa: Hey, do you remember our first cigarette together?

Nancy: How could I forget?

Vanessa: Share a light with me. For old times’ sake?

Vanessa: So, care to share all those burning questions you said you had for me?

Nancy: Now I feel like I’m being put on the spot.

Vanessa: Oh, come on. Don’t go shy on me now. How’s this? I’ll ask a question, then you, and so on.

Nancy: Alright. Shoot.

Vanessa: Do you still talk in your sleep?

Nancy: I- what!? I did not talk in my sleep!

Vanessa: Oh, yes you did. Full sentences too. You monologued even.

Nancy: Fuck off, I did NOT talk in my sleep! How would you know anyway? You were practically narcoleptic. I’d be up for hours after you fell asleep.

Vanessa: [murmurs] Still talks in her sleep- in denial about it. Ok. Got it. Your turn.

Nancy: I’ll ask a REAL question this time.

Vanessa: [smirks] That was a real question. I came all this way just to know but ok, ask away.

Nancy: Well, speaking of ‘all this way’. Where do you live?

Vanessa: Here and there. I don’t like to sit in one spot for too long; I get restless. Bored. I’ve spent the last 6 months in Tomorang. Beautiful people. Lovely culture. That’s actually where I heard your name mentioned for the first time. You’ve got quite the reputation over there. You’ve been up to no good, I hear.

Nancy: Christ...long story. Please don’t ask. Are you thinking of moving here?

Vanessa: Ah, ah. It’s my turn. Let’s see...ah! Who’s idea was it to make Geoffrey ‘Mr. Landgraab’. That’s probably the funniest shit I’ve ever heard.

Nancy: My parents, of course. They didn’t want to erase the family name and since they no longer have a son to continue their legacy- well. You get it. Speaking of marriage, are you married?

Vanessa: No, I’m not married.

Nancy: Well. Are you...seeing anyone?

Vanessa: [smirks] No.

Nancy: Children?

Vanessa: No children either. Those counts as a question, by the way.

Nancy: Oops. Ok, ok, you can ask two then. It’s only fair.

Vanessa: I guess I’ll ask a ‘real question’ then. Are you happy like this?

Nancy: [pauses] Like...what?

Vanessa: Married. Married to him. Does it make you happy?

Nancy: [shifts] I care for him very much. He’s the father of my children. He’s a good man and he’s good to me. Why are you asking me this-

Vanessa: Do you still like women?

Nancy: Do you?!

Vanessa: You have to answer my question first-

Nancy: Did you get my voicemail? November 2nd, 1993. I called you and I left you a voicemail. Did you hear it?

Vanessa: Nancy-

Nancy: Why didn’t you call me back? What—what happened to you, Vanessa? Where did you go? Where have you been!? Why, after all this time, am I just now seeing you?

Vanessa: It’s not really the easiest thing to talk about, but I know I owe you closure. [exhales] After I was pulled out of school, my father had me admitted. I received treatments to ‘fix’ me. Every time I fucked up and pissed off my father, he’d pack me up and ship me off until I came back normal and obedient.

Vanessa: There were days I thought I couldn’t keep going on like that, but then I heard your voicemail, and it... scared me. It made me angry. It broke my heart, but most importantly, it woke me up. I finally found the strength to escape my father and live my own truth. It cost me everything—my family disowned me. I relinquished my fortune, but in return, I’m free. I’m free, and I can live the life I deserve. I just... I wish I could have called, but life didn’t work out that way.

Nancy: It should have because I did call you, Vanessa.

Vanessa: I know.

Nancy: [weakly] I said that I loved you..

Vanessa: I know, I know...things were different for me back then.

Nancy: Things are different now! I’m married. I’m a mother!

Vanessa: I know, Nancy. I didn’t come here to break up a happy home.

Nancy: Why did you come here?

Vanessa: Can’t a girl miss her best friend?

Vanessa: Listen. I’ve thought a lot about how I would fit into your life if I ever got to see you again, if this was something you would want at all. That time we shared in our youth was the happiest I’ve ever been. I missed that feeling. I’ve missed you. I’m in a place to explore a friendship with you again, if you want it. If not, then I’ll accept that.

Nancy: I do want this. I want you here. I just...I can’t...

Vanessa: I know. It could be simple. Easy. I miss you, Nancy.

Nancy: [sighs] I miss you too. I’ve missed you so much.

[moosesarecute]

December 17th

December Masterlist

Masterlist

Her day had gone to exploring her home. She had been all over trying to find something that might restart her memory, but she couldn’t.

The toys she played with as a child, the kitchen she and her mother baked in and the library where she spent most of her time. None of them gave her any clues of her life before.

It gave Annette an uneasy feeling.

She felt alone and scared. The people who called themselves her family were nice enough, but she couldn’t trust them completely yet.

She and Cathrine, her mother, had been talking the entire day. She had been stroking Annette’s hair and told them about their life. She spoke about how Annette was adopted. That while it was usual for fae to struggle getting children, Cathrine and Bru just couldn’t live without a child.

When she was first born and sent to an orphanage, it didn’t take long before they found her and knew she was the one. Cathrine cried talking about it.

Her mother at least cared about her, Annette concluded with. Nothing to be worried about with her. The rest of her family had kept a bigger distance. Cathrine said it was to not overwhelm her.

When night arrived, Cathrine tucked Annette into bed. She told her to make sure she stayed worm and gave her some of her medicine. It tasted just as bad as before, but she got it down.

However, when Cathrine left, Annette didn’t feel like sleeping.

She quietly stood up from the bed and started to explore her room a little more. She looked at the books and toys and yarn, but she felt no connection to it. She found more of her stuff in boxes stored under her bed. She went through each and every one-off them, but didn’t find anything particularly interesting until the last box.

It had a backpack in it. It looked well made and sturdy. But it also looked like it had been used a lot. Maybe this was the backpack she used when she last was out on her adventures? She knew it was hers. She didn’t know why, but she just knew it.

She opened the backpack and found many bottles of red liquid and a pile of paper. She picked of the papers first. One piece of paper was folded around the others. She read it first:

Winterberry juice for memory loss. Drink as much as you can every day.

And some reading for the journey. Hope you find what you need in these letters.

Good luck,

Nick

Annette decided to drink the juice. It tasted amazing. Both sweet and tangy from the berry. She drank some of it and then picked up the rest of the pile of papers. She picked up the first one. It was covered in tearstains, but other than that it was beautiful. The handwriting was precise and carefully done. Annette started reading.

My dearest Y/N,

It’s been over three years. This is the third December without you, and it haven’t become easier.

Rhys and Cass are forcing me to go to therapy. My therapist, Jonathan, suggested I write you letters, so that’s what I’m doing.

You have missed so much, my light. Both Rhys and Cass have found their mates. Their names are Feyre and Nesta. They are sisters and used to be human, but that’s a story too long for letters. I promise I’ll explain all to you when if you come back to me. Feyre was the girl that saved all of Prythian from Amarantha. Rhys made her his High Lady and they even have a son, Nyx. And Nesta and some of her friends have become Valkyries. She and Cassian are always at each other’s throats, but they love each other. You would have loved them too, I’m sure of it.

Mor and Amren have also found their loves. Which means I’m constantly surrounded by couples.

I’m happy for them, I truly am, but I can’t help but feel like it’s a little unfair. Why do we have to be apart?

I miss you, my love. I honestly feel lost in this world without you. I’ve been counting days since you disappeared, and each day feels heavier on my heart.

The shadows also miss you. They have never been as poorly behaved as now. Some days I wake up from them screaming to get you back, other days they refuse to listen or talk to me.

All our memories together are what keeps me going, but I’m not sure how much longer I’ll last in this life without you. I need your soft smiles and warm embrace to get me through this. I know I won’t, but deep down I still have hope that I’ll be able to hold you once again. Hold you, and never let go.

I love you, Y/N. I have loved you all my life and I will keep loving you till the day my soul no longer exists.

x Your Shadow

The first thing Annette noticed was that she really wanted to know what happened to Y/N and who her shadow was. The second thing was that she felt sort of connected to the names. Rhys, Cassian, Mor and Amren felt like names she knew. Feyre and Nesta, she didn’t feel connected to, but from the way they were written about in the letters, she knew that they were kind.

Annette wasted no time picking up the next letter It was also covered in tearstains. It seemed like most of them were.

My dearest Y/N,

Jo asked me today to write about what our life would be like.

And even though I did like he asked, it only brought out painful emotions. I hate having to imagine this. I want it to be true. To be our real life.

I wanted us to buy a house. A house where we can make our own home. So that we can choose everything ourselves.

I wanted us to have a family. We never spoke about kids. Both of us knew that a war was coming and that we would need to go through a lifetime of terror before we could bring babes into this world.

I want us to fly together. Fly to work, fly to family dinner, fly as exercise, fly as fun. Flying have always been when I’ve felt the freest and I know you feel similar, but without you beside me, it feels wrong. So wrong. I have multiple times thrown up from flying without you.

I want us to be happy.

I want us to fight, and argue, and laugh, and cry, and smile. I want it all.

Please come back to me.

x Your Shadow

My dearest Y/N

I think therapy is helping a little.

I thought about you yesterday without crying. Do you remember our first dance? Not our first as a couple, but our first one ever?

Sneaking around in the woods behind Windhaven and dancing to the song from the shadows swirling around us. Our feet making the snow crunch beneath us.

If only the bond had snapped earlier or if I was just a little braver. I would have danced with you every moment I could. You deserve to be danced with you too. I’m glad we’re not longer in Windhaven. You deserved so much better than that camp.

You’re my princess. You should dance around in the ballgowns you make, but no, you always sold away the most beautiful ones.

I still dream about the blue gown you wore on your first Starfall as a couple. I wish I could see you in it again some time.

x Your Shadow

My dearest Y/N

I think the time has come. I’ve finally gone crazy. I felt you. I’m sure I did. But I couldn’t get to you. Please tell me where you are so that I can get you home. Please tell me.

Are you out there?

x Your Shadow

My dearest Y/N

Family dinner is hard without you. I always imagine you sitting besides me and it gets a little better.

Cassian spilled soup all over the floor yesterday. That’s nothing unusual, but it was all over a new carpet Feyre just bought. Feyre was about to become very angry when Nyx started laughing louder than ever before. Cassian is now Nyx’s favourite person.

I’m convinced that if Nyx knew you, you would outrank Cassian very quickly. I don’t know how much he knows about his auntie Y/N, but I know you would be the best aunt he could ever wish for. I’ll start telling him more about you when I can talk about you without crying.

x Your Shadow

My dearest Y/N

The shadows miss you too. They’ve been trying to braid my hair lately. It’s like they miss helping you with yours. I don’t think they understand that you’re gone forever. It’s like they’re in denial. It’s not that different from what I’m doing, but still, they shouldn’t have these complex feelings. I wish I would tell them that you’ll be back soon.

Sometimes the only thing they do is to scream in my head. I think they believe too that you’re out there, but I just can’t get my hopes up. Please give me or the shadows a sign and we’ll be there. I promise.

x Your Shadow

Annette was crying now. The letters were so full of grief she just wanted to hug this Shadow and tell him that everything would be alright.

She drank a little more of the winterberry juice. As she gulped it down, she felt her head grow lighter.

My dearest Y/N

It’s snowing. A lot. It’s like the sky is falling down in white. I can almost image you running around with your snow-zoomies. It’s like my entire body just expects you to sneak up behind me and dump way too much snow on me. The shadows have tried to do it, but it just isn’t the same.

Nyx spoke about the Winter Lights today. He told us that a friend from his kindergarten had painted them. I left the room before anyone continued speaking. I haven’t seen the lights since you left. It used to be such a good memory, but now it only brings pain. Our first kiss, my love. Under the Winter Lights after everyone else had gone inside. You always insisted to watch them until they had danced finished.

Maybe I’ll try to do that this year. I’ll do my best.

x Your Shadow

Imagine having your first kiss together under the Winter Lights. Annette’s heart melted at the thought. It felt right. She would love to experience that.

Annette picked up the last letter. It was filled with even more tearstains than the others. She drank the rest of the winterberry juice before she started to read.  

My dearest Y/N,

I have understood now that I must let you go.

Madja and Jonathan believe you might me out there, but I won’t survive if I get my hopes up now only for them to be crushed once more. I want to, but I just can’t. It’s too much.

My sweet, beautiful, amazing, wonderful, thoughtful mate. I love you so much and it hurts so much to have to do this, but it’s what you would have wanted.

I’m going to try to make this a good Winter Solstice. I’m going to keep our traditions alive. I’m going to make a snowfae, I’m going to have the snowball fight and I’m going to make cookies and hot chocolate to stay on the counter every second of every day. I’m going to try my absolute best to be happy. Even if you aren’t here to see it.

I don’t think I can go to see Jonathan any longer. Even though therapy has helped, I think Jonathan is wrong for me. I’ll se if I can find anyone else after Winter Solstice, but right now I need a break.

I’m also going to take a break from these letters. I might start with them again soon, but for right now, I need to put you behind me. I hope this is the best decision, but I have no idea what I’m doing.

My dearest Y/N. I will forever long for the life he had planned. I will forever sit with the feeling that half of my heart is yet to come home.

x Azriel, I’ll always be your shadow

It was his name that did it. His beautiful and kind name. The name you had grown that fond of throughout your life.

It was the name that made you smile, cry and feel safe all at once. It was a name that brought you so many emotions that you didn’t know how to act.

It was the name of your person.

Because you knew now that you aren’t Annette, 254 years old from the continent.

You are Y/N, 540 years old from Windhaven, and last but definitely not least. You are Y/N the proud mate of Azriel Shadowsinger.

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Dividers by: @issysh3ll

[elihermit]

Evan Buckley x female reader

His girlfriend gets into a car crash and he has to try and save her, he goes to the hospital with her and waits by her bedside for her to wake up. She ends up being paralysed from the waist down and when she wakes up and finds out she struggles to cope with it, she has physical therapy to try to regain her strength but she gets upset so buck tries to comfort her and helps her through it, when they get out of hospital he knows this is their new normal and he is positive and tries to support her. Please include lots of angst and fluff 🥹🫶 thank you xx

eternal sunshine

pairing: Evan “Buck” Buckley x fem!reader

summary: After a serious car crash, your lower body is paralyzed. You find it very hard to cope with, but Buck is not going to give up on you. Can you accept it?

word count: 2,4k

author’s note: thanks to an anon for this request, that’s a very special fic indeed, I hope you like it!

p.s. requests are open🫧

“(Y/N), I need you to stay awake. Please try for me, darling.” — you can hear Hen's voice, but it sounds like an echo. It's hard for you to stay conscious, you're gathering all your strength not to fall asleep, even though it sounds very tempting.

“Hen, I don’t feel my legs.” — panic rises in your throat, you feel sick. “Where’s Buck?”

Buck didn't have a shift today, but you were glad that familiar faces came to your rescue. You could trust them and not be afraid if something went wrong.

“We already called him, (Y/N), he’s on his way.” — at the same time, they took you out of that damn car and put you on a stretcher. You still couldn't feel your legs, but honestly, you couldn't feel your whole body. You were so afraid that fear paralyzed you. It’s probably normal.

You were carried to the ambulance, you felt that a couple more minutes and you would pass out. But you need to at least wait for Buck, he'll be so worried if he finds you unconscious.

“(Y/N)!” — you heard Buck's worried voice and felt his touch on your arm. He made it.

“Hey baby, I’m oka-“ — you couldn't finish the sentence, fatigue and fear took over and you blacked out.

You open your eyes already in the hospital. The bright light blinds your eyes and makes your head hurt even more. You didn't know how long you were lying like that, but your body was very numb.

“Hi, my love, welcome back.” — you hear Buck’s voice and turn your head in his direction. He's smiling at you, but his red and puffy eyes said he was crying.

You smile back at him and take his hand. You're just glad that it's finally over and you can recover. You close your eyes for a couple of seconds and exhale. You got out of this alive.

You open your eyes and the smile leaves your lips. You try to move your legs, but nothing works, you don't feel the whole lower part of your body. Panic engulfs your lungs and you start breathing faster.

“Buck, I can’t move my legs.” — your voice breaks and tears fill your eyes. You knew it was a bad sign when you were still at the scene of the accident.

“Shh, baby, you’re fine, breathe with me.” — Buck looks at you with a smile and tries to calm you down.

“I don’t need to breathe, tell me what’s going on.”

He looks at you and goes silent. He had hundreds of scenarios in his head about how he would tell you about it, but seeing how scared and confused you are, he just can't pronounce these words. He doesn't want to disappoint you.

But you didn't need to hear any words, everything was written on his face and it hurt more than any physical pain. A cry came out of your mouth. A terrible cry that turned into a scream. All the pain and all the resentment against yourself for getting in the car that damn day was reflected in this crying. Your whole body was shaking from how much you were crying. You were screaming. Buck pulled you into his arms and just held you. He's never seen you so lost and devastated, but he kept saying you weren't alone.

“Buck, what am I going to do? What are we going to do?” — you were able to tell between sobs.

You felt like you were suffocating and it was all becoming hysterical. Nothing will be the same as before. You'll be a burden, you won't be able to give Buck what you could have given him if you hadn't been paralyzed. Your life will be limited.

“We’re gonna fight, baby. And we will go through this as we have gone through all the difficulties before, okay?” — you shook your head in disagreement and turned away from him.

You can't look into Buck's eyes. You cannot accept that you will change not only your life, but also his. You would like to say that you are ready to fight, but you are not. You weren't ready for this and you don't know when you'll be ready.

“Hey. Hey, look at me.” — he spoke softly and gently turned your head so that you could look at him. “Our best solution is physical therapy. You have every chance to gain your strength and get back on your feet. I've already talked to the doctors, just trust me.”

“But it can take years. I don't want you to waste your years like this.” — it's true, you'd rather let him go than drag him along, you'll be completely dependent on him.

“My years will be wasted if you're not by my side. Not for one second did I think to leave you in this. This is our fight.” — Buck reaches for your lips and leaves the most tender kiss. There is so much care and love in this kiss that you have no choice but to believe him.

4 months later

Your life consists of a hospital and constant physical therapy sessions. You're tired and exhausted, but you've never been the type to give up quickly.

When you felt that you were going off the path and starting to move in the opposite direction, Buck was there to take your hand and put you back on the right path. He was always smiling, supportive, and proud of your little victories more than you are. For you, these were not victories, but reminders that there is still a lot of work ahead.

Today was another physical therapy session and you finally convinced Buck that you'd be fine without him. He did not miss a single session and because of this he could take fewer shifts at work. You knew that he loves his job and that's literally what energizes him better than any coffee, so today you sent him to work.

But Maddie was with you today, Buck couldn't leave you all alone, even though the doctors at the hospital became your family.

Everything was going well, you did the usual exercises, your therapist gave you a massage of the lower extremities between exercises, then you switched to special simulators.

“Look how good you’re doing, your progress is wonderful.” — you heard Maddie behind your back and froze.

It triggered something inside you. All 4 months you tried to be strong, not to show how desperate you are on dark evenings. You didn't want to be pitied, you wanted to be treated without much distinction.

But everyone behaved around you as if you needed to be coddled. They think they're helping you, but it just reminds you of your condition every time.

And you don't see any fucking progress. What are you doing that is so amazing? You don't run, you don't dance, you don't even walk, you just take little clumsy steps. How dare they call it progress.

“Okay, that’s all for today.” — you still had 20 minutes of the session left, but you didn't feel like finishing it.

“Why? Are you in any pain?” — your therapist asked with a concerned look and stood in front of you.

“No, I just don’t want to do it anymore, so don’t push me.” — you said it and clenched your jaw. You could feel anger filling your body and you wanted to get back to your room before you started snapping at everyone.

You heard the door open and saw Buck. What the hell is he doing here? He's supposed to be at work, but instead he's back here and he's going to babysit you.

“How’s my baby doing?” — Buck squatted down to be on the same level with you and gave you the sweetest smile.

“What are you doing here?”

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You were so annoyed that you needed to calm down. The last thing you wanted to do was take all your anger out on Buck. He doesn't deserve it, he's the only one who didn't treat you very differently when you got paralyzed.

“I canceled my shift because I couldn't miss your session. I know you said you'd be fine, but I just couldn't.” — he took your hand, kissed your knuckles and looked at you with a loving look.

“We've already finished, help me get to my room.”

When you got to your room, Buck helped you get on the bed. You loved having Buck with you in the evenings because he filled you with that sense of security and confidence. When he had night shifts, it was the most depressing time of your day because you were alone with your thoughts.

“So why did you finish earlier today? I thought you still had 20 minutes of your session when I came.” — lying down on the bed next to you, Buck asked you.

“I didn’t feel like continuing.” — you put your head on his chest and started drawing with your fingers some random stuff on his arm. You always did this when you had a lot of thoughts in your head, but you couldn't formulate them into sentences in any way.

“Why baby? Is something bothering you? You know you can always tell me.” — he’s so sweet, that’s why you don’t deserve him.

“A lot is bothering me, Buck. The expressions on people's faces when they come to me, how everyone tells me about progress and how I've been your burden for 4 months, but you can't admit it.”

You felt tears forming in your eyes. Anger was replaced by sadness, which tore you apart from the inside. It's a feeling of helplessness and complete lack of interest in this fight. You wanted to give up everything, to be alone so that no one else would waste their time on you.

“I can’t admit something that isn’t true, (Y/N). You survived and it's not a burden, but a blessing. I thank the universe for every day with you.” — he pulled you closer to him. How he would like to take away all the pain that's inside you. Buck knew what was going on in your head, so he was always there to reassure you.

“Sometimes I think it would be better if I died than to drag you through something you don't have to go through.” — you whispered it so quietly that you didn't know if Buck had heard. You weren't even sure that you heard your own voice.

Buck's heart broke at those words. You've never been so vulnerable with him, usually you go through even the most difficult events with a big smile and an open heart. But this accident took away a piece of you. You were once cheerful, but now you are completely broken.

“I didn't doubt us for a second. I don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone else, it's always been you.” — Buck put his fingers under your chin and lifted your head so you could look at him. “I know that you don't see progress and it's hard for you to accept that it's moving so slowly. Do you know why you don't see progress? Because every day you are in your body and you don't see yourself from the outside. But I see you. And I see all your efforts and you're doing such a good job, baby.”

“It doesn't feel like enough.”

“But you’re enough in every fucking way. I still see those (y/e/c) eyes that I fell in love with, I still see that smile that immediately makes my day better and I still see that woman I want to call my wife one day.” — Buck kisses your forehead.

“Even when I’m like this?” — you don't know why you're still doubting it, you don't want to lose Buck, but you need these words from him to be sure that you're not dragging him down and he really wants it.

“Like what? An absolutely normal human being? Nothing changed for me and my feelings are still the same too.” — you kiss him. For the first time in 4 months, you felt normal and you fucking loved it.

“Now baby, we will be home in a week, I’m sure familiar walls are going to make you feel better.” — and he kissed you one more time.

A week later, you were at home, your therapist said that you were ready for this and now you will travel to sessions from your home. You don’t need to live in a hospital now. Honestly, you were excited, you were homesick, and you wanted to be in an environment that always made you feel comfortable and safe.

Buck opened the doors to your shared house and said with a smirk:

“Welcome back, babygirl.”

The next thing you saw were your friends, who were joyfully welcoming you back.

“Here’s my girl, finally I will be able to come here on my days off and talk with a smart person.” — Hen had a big smile on her face and hugged you tightly.

“Ouch, I thought I was your one and only, Hen.” — Chim put his hand over his heart as if he had been stabbed. “But seriously, Jee missed her Aunt (Y/N), she’s excited to be babysitted by her favorite person.”

You loved this little girl, so you were always happy to spend time with her when Chim and Maddie were busy.

“Yeah, honestly, I will be back tomorrow, we need to bring back our barbecue parties, I'm craving your signature ribs.” — Eddie made the chef’s kiss.

“I thought I was making the best food, but Eddie hasn't stopped talking about these ribs for 4 months.” — Bobby laughed and came up to you. “Welcome back, (Y/N), we missed you.” — he gave you that fatherly hug that you loved so much.

You looked at Buck and for the first time smiled so sincerely that your cheeks started to hurt. You knew that the path would be long and difficult, but you will definitely cope with it next to your loved ones. A lot has changed, but at the same time nothing has changed, you can still enjoy all the joys that have become a part of you with each of your friends.

Buck came up to you and kissed you. Tears of joy poured from your eyes, right now you realize that you have the strength to cope with these and your relationship with Buck has become even stronger and more sensual.

“I think I can get used to this.” — you said into Buck’s lips. “I love you, thank you for being by my side.”

“Forever and always, I love you.”

One more kiss and this is your new normal.

[bullet-prooflove]

A Loaded Gun: Terry Silver x Reader

Tagging: @volumesofforgottenlore@kmc1989@somethingdarkside17@noonee333

The moment John Kreese steps into your home, you can sense the change coming. It’s in the way that Terry’s shoulders tense, his change of tone, the subtle clench of his jaw. You can tell he doesn’t want to introduce you, but his manner’s win out and you find yourself shaking hands with his ‘old friend’.

“So Terrance, you’ve actually the knot huh?” Kreese remarks as he glances between the two of you.

You know how it must look, a younger woman with an older man, especially one of Terry’s means. You’ve learned to ignore it but you can see how much it riles Terry. He’s protective when it comes to you he always has been.

“A few years ago.” Terry informs the other man, his fingers entwining with yours. “We’ll be celebrating our third anniversary in a couple of weeks.”

It feel like an invasion, the way Kreese stalks around the house examining the evidence of your relationship. He picks up the framed wedding picture of the two of you off the mantlepiece before he studies it intently. Terry watches him with crossed arms, dogging is footsteps like a predator. You’ve never seen him like this before, so guarded, so territorial.

“You say you’ve known each other a long time.” You remark as you begin to pour tea for the three of you. It’s a special blend of Sakura tea that you’d brought back from your last trip to Osaka, the you and Terry go every spring for the cherry blossom festival.

“Fifty years.” Kreese says taking up residence at your kitchen table. Terry lowers himself into the seat across from the other man, his eyes never leaving him. “We met in Nam, Special Forces.”

The atmosphere shifts as you tilt your head towards Terry because this is the first time you’re hearing about a career in the military. His lips purse together as he gives Kreese a glacial look, it’s the first time you’ve seen anything but warmth from the man you love.

He’s withdrawn after Kreese leaves, out of sorts. He spends the rest of the evening on the terrace in silence staring out across the sea. When the light starts to fade you come to stand alongside of him, your shoulder bumping lightly against his.

“You never told me about Vietnam.” You say quietly and Terry just shakes his head.

“I don’t like to go back there.” He tells you, his thumb chasing over platinum wedding band on his left hand. “My life spiralled when we got back home. The coke, the karate, I did a lot of things through the sixties, seventies and eighties that I wasn’t proud of. You weren’t even born then and I’d already fucked up my life.”

“You came through it through.” You say softly. “You went to rehab, stuck with therapy, got healthy. Don’t let John Kreese showing up on our doorstep derail you.”

Terry sighs as he rubs his palms together.

“There are things you don’t know, that I can’t ask you to understand and my connection to John Kreese is one of them.” He says, his voice a little rough. “He saved my life back then, there’s a debt there.”

“One he now wants you to pay.” You say with understanding.

“He wants me to come back to Cobra Kai.” Terry tells you, his hands gripping the railing so tightly his knuckles turn white. “It feels like he’s handed me a loaded gun.”

“One that you’re in control of.” You remind him as you study the profile of his features. “You don’t have to pull the trigger.”

“That’s the problem.” He says as he watches the storm clouds gather on the horizon. “It’s in my nature.”

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[777nicetits]

look who’s back ;P

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ baseball player!schlatt x physiotherapist!reader, mentions of injuries, a lot of bickering, not proofread. english is not my first language.

“Where is he?!” You borderline scream as you enter the locker room, the sea of (luckily clothed, save for a couple shirtless ones) players turning their heads over to where you and the nurses stood at the door.

To your right, you heard the unmistakable and ever so insufferable sound of a gravel, low chuckle. Your head whipped in its direction, fire burning behind your dilated pupils as your eyes found his. Standing by the entrance to the showers (mistake number one, not supposed to put any weight on his left leg), a damp towel thrown over his shoulder and another one wrapped around his hips (mistake number two, no full body showers, no wetting the bandage), the dirty uniform he wore previously carelessly laid on the ground next to his feet (mistake number three, absolutely no playing for the next three months).

Mother. Fucker.

“You gotta be shitting me!” This time you screamed. The room erupted in laughter, but you didn’t find anything about this situation funny.

With a heavy sigh you looked over your shoulders, head nodding once, the silent signal for the nurses to go get him, and so they did, walking over to the man with the wheelchair he hated so much.

Schlatt stumbled backwards, the back of his knee hitting the wooden bench behind him and almost knocking him onto his ass. “Hey! What’s this about?”

“You’re late for your physical therapy session. Y’know, the place you should’ve been instead of in the field, disobeying my direct orders!?”

He scoffed. “Can I at least put some clothes on? Or you want me to go like this, doc?”

I’m gonna kill this bitch, you thought.

But, instead of jumping on him like a hungry lioness and taking a piece of his jugular off with your own teeth, you just inhaled deeply, holding the oxygen in your lungs for a couple of seconds before letting go.

“Just bring the clothes,” you said calmly, “we’ll help you put them on in the clinic. Can’t risk you putting any more weight on your feet.”

Out of excuses, Schlatt reluctantly sat down on the wheelchair. Huffing and puffing his way out.

“I can’t believe you did that!” You slammed the door to your office open, the wood plank hitting against the wall and making everything on it shake.

Schlatt, who now had a shirt on and had taken control of his own wheelchair, rolled his eyes as he rolled himself in. “You’re so dramatic. It was just a light practice, I didn’t even-“

“Dramatic?!” You did a 180°, twirling like a ballerina to angrily face him. “Schlatt, you’re 100% my responsibility. If you keep disregarding what I tell you, you won’t get any better, and if you don’t get any better the higher ups are gonna blame me for that! I could lose my job!”

Schlatt kept looking up at you with a blank expression, and it was your time to roll your eyes. “Dunno why I’m telling you any of that, it’s not like you care anyways.”

You walk over behind your desk, opening the top drawer and taking some new bandages to replace Schlatt’s damp one, while he takes the moment you weren’t looking to get up, quickly throwing the towel around his hip to the floor and putting his underwear on.

“You’re not gonna lose your job.” He grunted, sitting back down on the wheelchair.

“Sure buddy,” you scoffed, closing back the drawer, “because when they ask you why haven’t you recovered you’ll tell them that’s it’s ‘cause you didn’t listen to me.”

“You think I’m that much of a douchebag I’ll just throw you under the bus like that?”

You crouched down in front of him, placing his feet on top of your knee, fingers working skillfully as you undid the bandage, careful as to not hurt him in the process.

“You’re not a douchebag, Schlatt,” you sighed, “I just know where your priorities lie. And I don’t blame you, I’d do the same if I had the talent you do… and the salary.”

With yours eyes still fixated on changing the bandage on his sprained ankle, you heard him scoff. “My priorities? Yeah, right.” He leaned in, hand cupping your chin and lifting your head up, your eyes meeting his. “Maybe you should let me take you out for a couple drinks, show you where my priorities really lie.”

To say that his offer took you by surprise would be an overstatement. Ever since you started working with the Yankees, Schlatt has always flirted with you, just for fun (and you always send him on some HR visits, y’know, just for fun), but this is the first time he’s ever gotten this close to you, touching you while he talks with that smooth voice of his, that stupid grin plastered on his face. The bastard knows what he’s doing, and he knows he’s good at it.

You placed his feet back on the floor with little care, making him wince, and got up, your thighs burning a bit.

“You haven’t seen miss Anderson this month, have you?”

“Oh c’mon, toots,” he chuckled, “you can’t pretend you don’t like the attention forever. Just give me one night, you won’t regret it, I swear.”

You looked down at him, arms crossed over your chest. It’s not a matter of liking the attention, it’s more of a matter of not hating it. Or at least that’s what you’ve been trying to convince yourself.

“I’ll call Nelson to come help you put your pants.” You say after awhile of silence, making your way over to the door.

Schlatt lets out a breathy laugh. “Just so you know, I won’t let it go until you say yes!” He screamed as you walked away, leaving him by himself in your office.

You shook your head, a dumb little smile on your face.

I really hope you don’t.

aaaand scene 🎬 !! it took me three whole days to write this lmao, what can i say? i’m just that good at procrastinating 🤪

[sleepyparalysisdmon]

Ateez comforting a stressed partner

Requested? Yes! Request: ‘ateez members comforting stressed out reader’

Hongjoong Also a stressed workaholic, so I fully believe he’ll plan something for you both to unwind. The moment you both have some shared time off, even if it’s just for a night, he’s demanding that you both shut out work for the time being. Calls will go to voicemail and texts will be unread as you both have a nice, big dinner and lie on the couch together. Absolutely does not matter that you both might be asleep at an insanely early hour because you both deserve it.

Seonghwa So gentle about pulling you away from work for a breather. Encourages you to schedule breaks during the day. Asks multiple times a day if you’ve eaten, even if those are the only messages he’s gotten to send that day. Sneakily turns off or changes your alarms when you have the opportunity to sleep in. Will blink innocently if you ever get frustrated by these gentle reminders.

Yunho Not gentle at all about pulling you away from work for a breather. Lets you burn the midnight oil for a couple nights, but by the third, he’s taking your computer from you to save your work and shut it down. Then he’ll feed you and carry you to bed if he has to. Really just wants you to take care of yourself, but doesn’t have an in between. Either lets you overwork without a word or physically pulls you away kicking and screaming.

Yeosang Admires your work ethic and knows he can’t always stop you from taking too much on. But cups of coffee or tea will magically appear in front of you while you work. Dinner is made and leftovers are packed up for lunch tomorrow. Your clothes are laundered and an outfit is laid out for the morning. Totally silent about these little things because he really just wants to worry about the important things if you have to worry at all.

San Worried for your health when you get stressed like this. Will try to be gentle at first, planning some fun things to get out and do away from your stressors. If those things don’t help you unwind a little, then prepare for a serious conversation about taking care of yourself. Will beg you to take a few days off or take on fewer responsibilities, or at the very least be reasonable about what you can accomplish in a day.

Mingi Will do his best to help you with the things your stressed about. If you’re dreading a big project around the house, he’ll be there to do the heavy lifting. If you’re worried about money, he’s offering to help pay for it. If you’re stressed about work, well… he might not be able to help, but will certainly sit with you and keep you company while you work. Doesn’t want you to feel like you have to carry any of that burden by yourself.

Wooyoung Another one that’s not gentle about this. Will straight up turn off your alarms and call your boss to tell them you’re sick and can’t make it in. When you wake up in a panic, he takes absolutely no lip about it and tells you to get ready. Then he’s taking you somewhere to relax and do something for yourself - a massage or a facial, getting your hair or nails done, or maybe some retail therapy. Whatever you like, doesn’t matter because you’re going. Will not let the thought of work enter your mind because he’s too busy yapping about literally anything else.

Jongho Simultaneously sympathetic and totally unimpressed. Will raise an eyebrow at you when you insist you need to get some things done. “Do you? Why?” Will make you tell him why and counter everything you say with an argument. You’re so irritated by the argument that you’re no longer stressed about anything else anymore. Will look pretty smug when he recognizes he’s won and drags you to the couch or to bed for some well deserved rest.

[shiggybrainr0t]

suggestive content, mdni. warnings: not discussing kinks before hand.

we always talk about bakugo learning how he can be gentle with you, and how hard that is for him because his hands have caused so much destruction- on people, in places- and if he accidentally hurt you it would kill him. but what about teaching him that’s it’s ok to be a little rough as well?

bakugo holds you in very high regard- he has standards that are out the roof and you exceed them all. he treasures you immensely, because he knows that his temper is still rough, and that he’s too quick to pop off when things get heated, and he still isn’t the best communicator, but you understand him. you understand that he’s trying- and he is! therapy has reduced from twice a week to a couple times a month, so that shows his progress in itself. you tell him all the time that you love him for him, hot headed as he is. one day he came home from a mission gone wrong-he couldn’t save as many as he knew he could have, if he had just done more- and when you took one of his large scared hands in your own and kissed his palm, lips coming back slightly shiny from the nitroglycerin still coating them, that was the first time you ever saw him cry.

so bakugo treats you gently. he’s finally understanding that his hands can be used for good. his hands cook you your favorite food, they caress your back soothingly whenever you both cuddle, they pat a child’s head when they excitedly run up to him when he’s on patrol. they make you giggle, and moan when he crooks his fingers just right. they grip your own hands tightly when you’re both close.

when you guide his hand to your throat the first time he freaks out. almost falls off the bed in haste to get away from you, because the image of him holding you like some villain he had just caught is one he can’t stand. you realize then that this is something you both need to talk about. he looks so vulnerable sitting there, naked and wide eyed, staring at you with so much raw emotion. afraid he’s hurt you even though you were the one who initiated it.

it takes time, and communication, but eventually you don’t have to guide his hand to your neck anymore, he does it himself and finds that it fits perfectly. he doesn’t shy away from digging his fingers into your hips, or biting your shoulder. doesn’t feel bad for liking it whenever you like it so much as well. he pulled your head back by your hair one night and you let out a moan so loud and clenched so tightly around him he had to stop because he almost came undone.

exploring the waters with you isn’t scary, because just as you trust bakugo to always keep you safe, he trusts you the same way.

[crescentpaws]

“surely crescentpaws’s sims version of fintante can’t get any worse right?” WRONG!

they’ve just started straight up refusing each other’s romantic interactions now 💀 can’t even kiss a guy anymore without him shoving you away from him smh. guys you are literally married come on

sigh. divorce arc is happing too soon

- their relationship bar got so low they’re not even friends anymore 😭

this screenshot is funny. WDYM ACQUAINTANCES. YOU’RE LITERALLY MARRIED 😭😭 (and they definitely are foes now… this is what the strained romance dynamic does to a couple i guess…)

- i had them go on a date (in their own house this time so they wouldn’t get mad at random outside forces) that was specifically designed to help fix bad relationships but… it didn’t really work at all

- they got into a physical fight 😭 guys stop it with the domestic violence come on now you’re better than this (no they’re not)

(fintan won. if you even care. he wins most of his fights these days (other than the grim reaper one lmfao))

- full red bars for both friendship and romance ❤️ yay ❤️ i’m so happy for them (someone needs to divorce them immediately)

- so that was probably the worst date ever.

- was curious to know if bronte was still attracted to fintan after all of this and he acted like it was a crazy thing to ask….

hm. do i need to bring up the “you’re married” thing again

- they literally do NOT care…. guys come on i am trying to help you… they’re too proud to try to work out their issues 💀

- sending them to couple’s therapy ❤️

- it worked a tiny bit??? it changed their relationship dynamic from strained to steamy which at least makes them more willing to be physically intimate… tbh i think this was my saving grace actually.

(bronte did not like it though.)

- basically then i just kept having them flirt & kiss over and over again until they didn’t hate each other as much 💀 at one point their romance bar was almost completely filled at the same time they were still in the red friendship zone which i thought was funny

okay ❤️ yay ❤️

(tune in next week where there is a 90% chance that this will happen all over again. (probably going to send them to couple’s therapy again just to be safe LMAO) i love when the game is canonically accurate <3)

[banamine-bananime]

meets an encouraging, patient, fatherly commanding officer that chooses tucker specifically for an assignment and takes him under his wing. he’s actually a secret operative for a sinister military project recruiting tucker as a target practice guinea pig orchestrating the next couple years of his life to be a lie.

meets an alien that tells tucker he’ll help him fulfill the quest he’s the legendary hero of. he chestbursts him and steals a getaway vehicle given upon the “end” of the quest.

meets some weird computer program programmed by the culture the prophecy came from, pretty much the only remaining source of information about this “quest” that’s upended his life. it’s actually the ai of the freelancer trying to kill him and kidnap and use his kid to end the great war… uh, with slavery of the alien species

meets one of his best friends, an acquired taste and kind of an ass, but they give each other as good as they get and they’re a team. she leaves them to make the plan to capture junior and use him to enslave his species succeed. and tucker feels like can’t even be mad about it without feeling guilty because in her mind she was sacrificing herself and junior to save humankind from a losing war for survival, and immediately after he thinks she fucking dies and takes his kid with her!! they were friends and then for a few minutes they were almost enemies because she did the worst thing for the best reasons and then that’s it!!! how do you even grieve and process that. apparently tucker opted for watching reservoir dogs instead of therapy and i can’t blame him. that’s not the sort of grief you can find a self-help book for. HELLO I’VE BEEN SCREAMING FOR YEARS. never over it they make me insane.

meet some humans on the desert dig-team, charismatic down-to-earth soldier guys. breath of fresh air after he’s been stuck for months in complicated political situations with a species that has just recently decided to perhaps not kill all humans, as a reluctant religious figurehead in diplomatic corps that i’m sure just loved his way with words and women. bet he made a lot of friends there. the dig team kills them all except him and he proceeds to spend the next months in a psychological thriller slash survival horror.

meet church again. church leaves again (and then again) and tucker’s left furiously picking up the pieces of blue team with caboose and some blond guy they rescued from the pound. we needn’t talk about that blond guy and whether tucker knows he both set up and hit the Original Church Killswitch lest tucker doesn’t know and hears us because i think he doesn’t need that extra complication in his life tbqh.

meets a charismatic mercenary with a rough exterior, but a heart of gold, right when tucker and caboose have lost all of blue team’s charismatic mercenaries and/or assholes with a rough exterior but a heart of gold. he. well. he stabs him in the back, guys. you know. i can’t get more on-the-nose than that.

meets church again. he seems like maybe he kind of gets that he was an ass and won’t go off killing himself this time. immediately after reconciling he sees the siren call of martyrdom and kills himself instantly after simulating several ways it could go very, very extremely badly for tucker, not even counting the previous evidence from how this went for some blond guy (sorry i’m committed to just calling him some blond guy in this post now for no reason except that i think it’s a mildly funny bit).

meets church someone else who’s been fucked over by project freelancer. he’s been manipulating them to get close enough to freezermurder their friends and implicate them in terrorism charges.

meets yet another young stray asshole with Issues and a heart of gold who needs some guidance, maybe someone he can be the kind of a leader he wishes he could have been to green team. she also stabs him again.

at some point we have to let tucker just start stabbing people. like a lot of people. i don’t think he’d enjoy a villain arc once he realizes that’s what’s happening but he deserves the sheer free joy and clarity of just solving problems with pure simple stabbing before he comes to that realization.

[m0rkl]

The People We Become || Reverse AU || FiddAuthor

Hurray I have a name for this AU now! Please come yap with me more about this and the messy FiddAuthor relationship I'm about to describe

Fiddleford and Stanford's Relationship

After their initial falling out because of the portal and Bill, Fiddleford had told himself he was going to erase his memory of his entire partnership with Ford and go back to his wife and child. He promised Emma-May this would be the end and, were this the canon timeline, this would be the final use of the memory gun that really fries Fiddleford’s brain making him the ‘Old Man McGucket’ we see in canon.

But when Stanley falls into the portal and it blows up, Fiddleford notices the explosion and rushes to the lab instead. He ends up taking care of an unwell and confused Ford and not going back to Emma-May. He explains to her that Ford doesn’t have anyone else and Emma-May understands that, but she can’t have Tate expecting his dad to come home when Fiddleford simply won’t put them first. They agree to a divorce and that Fiddleford will stay out of their lives for a while, except for birthdays, holidays and the like.

Emma-May and Fidds have a good relationship nowadays, but Ford is very awkward around the family and has no interest in being a father figure to Tate. This is one of many points of conflict in Ford and Fidds relationship.

Early in their relationship, they had a lot of issues due to Ford being insensitive and getting frustrated with Fidds memory issues, but ended up going to couples therapy and having Ford learn how to assist Fidds through his memory lapse episodes and set up the house in a way that would be helpful to him.

They might be married but their relationship is far more complicated than at first glance.

Ford is ace-aro, but loves Fiddleford in his own way. He wants Fidds to be his companion for life, but it's not romantic love.

Fiddleford, however, is romantically in love with Ford and has to navigate the fact that Ford does not and will never want him in certain ways. Is it totally healthy? No! No it is not.

They sleep in separate bedrooms, but Fiddleford will sleep in Ford’s bed on occasion, especially if he’s had a memory lapse that day.

They’re legally married. Ford was the one who brought it up after gay marriage was legalized. He was very excited, but extremely unromantic about it as he thought it would be great for their tax situation and health care. Fiddleford was endeared, but a decade later is still sad they never had a proper wedding. Fiddleford loves referring to Ford as his husband or other pet names, but Ford almost exclusively called him Fidds or Fiddleford.

Fiddleford very much grounds Ford and reminds him how to be a human being rather than a work-machine. He gets him to eat regularly and sleep a semi-decent amount, as well as tries to help regulate him emotionally sometimes, even if he isn't always successful.

Ford challenges Fiddleford's creativity and they still work on inventions together, even after Ford starts turning more to writing. They go on adventures, chasing after the bountiful weirdness of Gravity Falls and save each other from various situations.

Over the years Ford is happy with their situation and Fiddleford is… happy? If a little unsatisfied. He knows Ford won’t love him the way he wants and Fidds desperately tries to convince himself he’s okay with how things are. But he is very much romantically in love with Ford while Ford cares about him and wants his company, but does not feel anything romantic towards him.He understands that Ford feels things differently and its not bad, but its not meeting all of his needs either. They both tell themselves this is fine when it's not really.

Everything comes to a head when eventually, Ford regains his memories and realizes what Fiddleford has been hiding from him all these years. 

They fight because in Fiddleford’s mind, he did this to save Ford from the portal and from himself. He knows Ford would have destroyed himself trying to save Stanley and put not only himself, but the whole world at risk opening it again.

Fiddleford tries to explain his point of view and how much he feels like he’s given and suffered for Ford over the years, but it goes unheard. Ford just is furious that he was lied to and likens Fiddleford to Bill, which isn’t wholly true, but devastates Fiddleford nonetheless.

While Ford settles Stanley into the house, Fiddleford goes to live with Tate, who does live in Gravity Falls.

Their break up causes some tension between Mabel and Dipper because Mabel is siding with Fiddleford and Dipper is siding with Ford. The twin’s aren’t entirely looking at the situation as black and white, but they do pick sides.

Mabel tries really hard to bring them back together through a series of ‘parent trap’-like hijinks, but it doesn’t really turn out like she hopes. However, Stan talks to Ford and they discuss the long years where Ford didn’t have anyone to rely on by Fidds. Stan also talks a little bit of sense into Ford and helps him realize that sometimes Ford lets his anger get the better of him and he doesn’t properly listen to what other people are trying to say.

Ford and Fiddleford finally do talk about their feelings and what went wrong on both ends. They decide that for the moment they still need some time apart for the moment and they’ll see how it goes from there.

[postmanlee514]

Okay I’v been thinking about some post-game Rookanis thing since I finished my first playthrough

Spoiler ahead alert!

So here’s my hc: since my Rook is a Shadow Dragon,they will join the rebuilding of Mintharous and Lucanis needs to take the duty of The First Talon. The couple may have a long time couldn’t be able to make time for each other.

And finally the two get their time to discuss their own business such as:

1) Where to live, they can’t be separated in two city forever. Rook probably will be the one to compromise? They do enjoy the city and I think maybe Teia will invite them even before Lucanis asks LOL

2) my Rook is a Necromancer, It’s time to talk about necromancy with Lucanis 😆 I knew Emmerich tried but Hey! This is Rook speaking! Maybe Lucanis will try to understand necromancy?

3) Keeping pets. Lucanis already has a pet snake but how about Rook? Growing up in a military family, maybe they moved around a lot. This time they finally settle down, so keep pets is a good way to provide a sense of stability. But I also think Spite may disagree Lucanis and Rook’ decision Hahaha

4) About wounds healing . My Rook was a foundling and lost their parents years ago,then was Varric who was their nearly-father for like half a year, then was Harding-their longest-standing companion. They can’t be not having trauma in losing someone and be really fear to be abandone. So after all they’ve been through, maybe this is the chance Lucanis will be there for them for a mind therapy ? I would love to see them curing each other. <3

Followed are some of my gripes(No need to read!)

I literally cried for like 2 hours when I saw what Rook experienced when they trapped in Fade.Varric is always my favorite since DA 2, and damn! Varric’s words really help me to continue the game after the Mintharous or Treviso Choice. Shadow Dragons and Neve blamed all of this to Rook (and I was like “Rook is only one person without army and forces how could they be able to save the city? And Minrathous did have far more forces than Treviso has”)and they’ve already messed up the ritual. The self-doubt was about to overwhelm them, but they had to pretend to be optimistic and help everyone in the team dealing their problems.

My Rook has never considered themselves as a leader, they just stood out and begun to take the duty of finishing the job and they tried their best to take care of everyone. In the game,Varric was the only one asked Rook how long has it been since they’ve slept while they’re worrying others’ sleeping.

And the absence of companion banter, didn’t got their option when companion talking about a mage thing,etc…really made me feel unwanted . I hope maybe someday bioware could add some rook’s reaction to companion banter🥲

I mean, at least they should have comments on Romanced Lucanis told Taash how to kill mages and that’s like dancing or seduction …

“I’m right here hearing! Lucanis! ”

English is not my first language so please forgive me if I say something weird 🥲

about my Rook:

[moosesarecute]

December 4th

December masterlist

Masterlist

“I’m not going to do that,” Azriel told Jonathan.

Rhys had met him outside him room and followed him to therapy. Azriel would have gone anyway. After the session yesterday, he felt lighter than he had the past years. He wanted to go back.

Jonathan was a mate that had lost his mate and Azriel was going through the same. He felt seen.

“Writing down one’s feelings make it easier for the brain to let go of them,” Jonathan tried to explain why Azriel should write a diary.

Azriel, however, didn’t feel ready to let go of his grief. He felt like he then was letting go of you.

“What if you write letters to Y/N. You can pretend to tell her about all she’s missed or all the feelings and moments you would have loved to share with her.” Jonathan suggested with a glint in his eyes.

Azriel nodded. He could try.

My dearest Y/N,

It’s been over three years. This is the third December without you, and it haven’t become easier.

Rhys and Cass are forcing me to go to therapy. My therapist, Jonathan, suggested I write you letters, so that’s what I’m doing.

You have missed so much, my light. Both Rhys and Cass have found their mates. Their names are Feyre and Nesta. They are sisters and used to be human, but that’s a story too long for letters. I promise I’ll explain all to you when if you come back to me. Feyre was the girl that saved all of Prythian from Amarantha. Rhys made her his High Lady and they even have a son, Nyx. And Nesta and some of her friends have become Valkyries. She and Cassian are always at each other’s throats, but they love each other. You would have loved them too, I’m sure of it.

Mor and Amren have also found their loves. Which means I’m constantly surrounded by couples.

I’m happy for them, I truly am, but I can’t help but feel like it’s a little unfair. Why do we have to be apart?

I miss you, my love. I honestly feel lost in this world without you. I’ve been counting days since you disappeared, and each day feels heavier on my heart.

The shadows also miss you. They have never been as poorly behaved as now. Some days I wake up from them screaming to get you back, other days they refuse to listen or talk to me.

All our memories together are what keeps me going, but I’m not sure how much longer I’ll last in this life without you. I need your soft smiles and warm embrace to get me through this. I know I won’t, but deep down I still have hope that I’ll be able to hold you once again. Hold you, and never let go.

I love you, Y/N. I have loved you all my life and I will keep loving you till the day my soul no longer exists.

x Your Shadow

Annette sat in the living room and ate her stew. The warmth spread through her body as she ate. She sat in front of the fireplace and her book about the winter light laid open in her lap. She had read the whole book twice and she was now on the third read.

How she wished to experience the lights. Just reading about them gave her a feeling of comfort and calm. She couldn’t imagine what actually seeing them would feel like.

A loud bang caught her attention, and she looked over at her family sitting around the table. All of them watched Cris as he talked loudly.

“We have been planning this for three years,” he almost yelled. “If we are going to do this, it will have to be now!”

The rest of her family nodded in agreement. They looked happy, almost relieved. Annette realized now would be a good time to ask them if she could join them in whatever they were speaking about.

She carefully laid both her book and her bowl of stew on the table, before she stood up. She wrapped her wings tightly around her body and wrapped a blanket around her to make sure she kept warm. Using almost soundless steps, she moved towards her family.

When she got to the top of the table, everyone turned their gaze towards her.

She suddenly turned nervous. Fifteen pairs of eyes, pluss Cris’ single eye, were looking at her. She felt like they were staring into her soul.

“I was wondering if I could maybe help you with your plans or something,” she said. Her voice was barely above a whisper and she started to wonder if they had heard her at all.

“You know you can’t, Annie,” Bru was the first one to speak. “Your health is too poor.”

“But do we actually know that? We haven’t tried!” she tried to argue.

“You don’t remember what we have tried. Last time you went outside, we found you without your memories. We can’t let that happen again!” Cathrine spoke next. Her worry was visible on her entire body language. “Your heart is still weak from last time. We don’t know how bad the damage will be.”

They had told her the story multiple times. That she wandered outside and when they found her, she was passed out. She had woken up three days later and her entire memory was gone and her heart was weak.

That was three years ago, and she still can’t remember anything from before.

But it had been three years! They should try again! Maybe things went better this time.

“Please leave, Annette,” Cris said next.

Annette let out an annoyed breath but did as he said.

She picked up her book and took her food to the library. She sat down in the most comfortable chair. She usually sat on benches or backless chairs, because of her wings. They were never comfortable when she sat in chairs, but this one was better than the rest.

Her wings were useless. The only things she used them for was to fly so that she could reach the books that were the highest up. Other than that, they were just two annoying pieces of leather-like skin that hung from her back. They were always in the way, and she never found a position that was enjoyable.

“This is so unfair,” she huffed to no one as he picked up her book and started reading once more.

“The lights would always shine north in the sky. Many lost creatures from any place in Prythian have used the Winter Lights to navigate and find their way home. In the day, they would know that the sun went from the east to the west, and at night, the Winter Light would be in the north.”

Annette couldn’t help but let out a longing sigh. Imagine being lost and feeling the warmth from the lights was they showed the way home.

Home.

A word that was used often, but Annette couldn’t seem to understand it. She felt a longing for home. She wanted to experience and choose her own home. Even though Bru and Cathrine took care of her, and said they had done that her entire life, it didn’t feel right.

To be honest, it felt less and less right.

She was probably just influenced by all the books she read about breaking free and becoming and she knew she would never be able to do the same. They would never let her out.

Taglist: @prettylittlewrites

Divider by @issysh3ll

[eight-littlenightmares]

whump idea: screaming

cw: recapture, screaming, gag, car, references to past trauma, young whumpee, kidnapping, a lot of swearing/vulgar language, ehh stuff like that

***

Whumpee is walking home. It’s been a few weeks since she’s escaped her kidnapper Whumper—she’d been there a couple months, hadn’t even been the worst couple months she’d ever had, especially compared to the other incident—and she’s feeling better.

Or at least that’s what she’s telling herself. Truthfully she’s just as jumpy as always.

And tonight is no exception. In fact she’s feeling even worse tonight. She’s walking home after hanging out with her best friend all day. It had been great, she absolutely loves her best friend, but she’d stayed a little later than she’d meant to and now it’s pretty dark out. She feels strangely paranoid and she’s not quite sure why.

No, she does know why. She’s been jumpy ever since her first kidnapping, two or three years ago. She’d barely started recovering from that when Whumper had kidnapped her, that bastard.

Whumpee starts walking faster. She knows she’s just being stupid and paranoid as always, but she can’t shake the feeling that she’s being watched. And also maybe followed—no, no, she’s being ridiculous.

She’s going to get home just fine, and when she does she is going to sit on a fucking counter to exposure therapy herself. (It hasn’t really done anything other than make her unreasonably anxious yet, but she’s sure it’ll work at some point.)

But then Whumpee feels something. Nothing physical, nothing at all, but just a feeling, a feeling of something being Very Wrong. She can’t help it, she starts to turn around to look—

And then hands are on her.

Someone grabs her around the waist, someone much bigger than her, with rough hands and smelling of cigarette smoke.

Whumpee reacts immediately, shrieking and kicking at her attacker.

“..stop screaming,” a voice whispers into her ear. “I told you I’d find you again.” It’s Whumper’s voice.

Whumpee goes into a fit of terror. HELL NO, she is NOT being kidnapped again, she absolutely will not stand for it. No.

She starts to scream. As loud as she fucking can, screaming her fucking throat raw. She is NOT going back. She is not going ANYWHERE except HOME.

“HELP!!!” Come on. There’s gotta be someone nearby, someone who will wake up or who is already awake, someone who will care enough to save a poor teenager being kidnapped. Right? SOMEONE WILL SAVE HER, RIGHT?

She’s so fucking sick of this. She doesn’t wanna go back and she doesn’t wanna go anywhere with anybody, especially not Whumper. While Whumper isn’t the very worst person she’s ever had to deal with, he’s certainly not someone she ever wanted to see again. Fuck this guy anyways.

“Shut up,” Whumper snaps, glancing around to make sure they’re not being follows as he drags Whumpee towards his car.

Whumpee starts to scream louder. She’s getting more desperate. She will NOT go in that car, she absolutely REFUSES.

And then Whumper pulls a piece of cloth out of his pocket and ties it around Whumpee’s head in a gag. Whumpee struggles uselessly. She tries to scream again but her voice is muffled.

Whumper forces her facedown into the backseat of the car, wrenching her arms painfully behind her back and tying them with a length of rough cord. Whumpee feels tears begin to prick at the back of her eyes as she screams her fucking heart out. It’s not enough. It’s not fucking enough.

The car door slams shut. It sounds like a nail in a coffin. Then Whumper climbs into the front seat and starts the car.

The car starts moving. Whumpee has been kidnapped. Again.

(Hello!! Author’s note!! This is technically a oneshot of one of my OCs, but you can apply it to any character!! I also do not mind if you’d like to reblog and continue the story!!)

edit: changed Whumpee’s pronouns to she/her because she’s supposed to be based off of my OC anyways :D

[blinktwicebaby]

Whumptober

Day 31- Therapy

Fandom- Thunderbirds

Also posted here

“You can say whatever you want in this room, John” Dr Monroe said, her fingers interlocked in her lap.

“Yes, thank you. I don’t really know what to say.”

“That’s okay. Have you ever used a therapy service before?”

“Yes. Years ago.”

“And how was it?”

“Didn’t work” John laughed bitterly, finally catching Dr Monroe’s eyes.

“What didn’t work about it?” She asked politely.

“I don’t like telling strangers about my problems.”

“I get that. I also know that you’re here right now because you HAVE to be here. That probably makes it harder.”

“Yes.” John broke the eye contact and scratched the back of his head, then brushed his nose with a finger. “I mean… we lose people sometimes. The number one rule in my line of work is that ‘you can’t save everyone’.”

Dr Monroe considered the man sitting in front of her.

“This was a very public loss. Have you ever lost someone closer to you? A family member?”

“Yes.”

“May I ask what your reaction was when she died?”

John’s lip twitched in the corners.

“It was a long time ago.”

“Okay.”

They sat in silence, Dr Monroe watching him and John avoiding looking at her. She nudged the tissue box closer and John took a couple. He blew his nose and dropped them into the bin at the edge of the coffee table.

“If you want to get anything out of your mandatory sessions, you’ll need to talk to me.”

“I don’t think I’ll get anything out of them” John replied breathily, looking up at the ceiling where a dream-catcher was hanging behind the doctor.

“Maybe, maybe not. If you don’t try though, it just seems like wasted time.”

John couldn’t suppress his mild laugh and he glanced into the Doctors eyes again, only for a moment.

“I don’t think I did anything wrong.”

“That’s a good start… the news said the accident was preventable, but not for your efforts. You boys seemed to have done everything you could.”

“We did. I did, anyway.”

“You seem to have a healthy relationship with your family, and the casualties of your work don’t seem to bother you.”

“They do, but we have to move on.” John crossed his arms and leaned back on the couch.

“Moving on gets us to tomorrow.”

* * *

“Have you done any therapy sessions before, Gordon?”

“Nope, my brains as healthy as a horse’s” Gordon replied cheerfully, taking a mint from the bowl on the table. He chewed it loudly, a little grossly.

“Even healthy people come to therapy. There are lots of reasons someone might come to see me.”

“I can think of a dozen reasons to come see you” Gordon said smoothly, leaning on the arm of the couch. Dr Monroe’s lips pressed together. He was very different to the first Tracy.

“How do you feel about being here mandatorily?”

“Being forced to spend an hour with you? I don’t see the problem in that at all.”

“Is that how you’d like to fill your sessions, Gordon?” Dr Monroe asked, his charm already becoming somewhat annoying. He was half her age and she wasn’t interested. She doubted he was either.

“I suppose it does get a bit repetative” Gordon laughed, taking a tissue from the box next to the mints. He started folding it, his hands sufficiently distracted.

“How did you feel after the incident?”

“It was a bit much, but nothing scares me, baby.”

“I understand you pilot Thunderbird 4? You must have seen a lot from the water.”

His fingers paused on the tissue. Had she found a crack?

His fingers kept moving after a moment, but they seemed more precise, more focused.

“I saw a lot. I had prime seats for the explosion…” he laughed while he spoke, but there was a hidden hurt in his voice that made Dr Monroe’s heart pinch.

“There were bodies. It was black from the smoke, and then bodies started falling into the water all around Thunderbird 4. It was raining corpses.”

“That sounds terrifying, Gordon” Dr Monroe said, shaking her head slowly.

“It was.” His fingers finished with the tissue and he placed the little origami fish deliberately on the table. “They were all I could see… I thought one of them-”

Gordon blew air slowly out his mouth. The corners of his lip curved upwards, the fake smile he’d worn at the start of the session returning. “One of them looked like Alan, but of course it wasn’t him. He was safe in Thunderbird 3.”

“Do you relate many of the people you see in your work to family members?”

“Sometimes… it’s not always family though. Or the people I help. You kind of look like my future girlfriend.”

* * *

“I went to therapy when I was a kid after my Mom died. We were in an avalanche and… well, I already did my time for that.”

“Did your time? Do you not want to be here?”

“No- no, it’s not that! I don’t mind being here, and who knows, maybe it’ll be good for me. Maybe I need it, but I guess I won’t know until I try it.”

“That’s a healthy way to look at it. Very positive.”

“I’m not against it, and I think it worked last time because I feel like I’ve come to terms with my mom dying, and it kind of but not really being my fault… you know, instead of it being completely my fault, but this time it MIGHT have been my fault, but I don’t- think- it was?”

“What makes you think this incident might have been your fault?” Dr Monroe asked, throwing his word choices back at him.

“My job was to carry the rig into space when everyone was away from it but I didn’t even get that far. I was helping Virgil- I mean, Thunderbird 2- and we were pulling apart the top of the towers so Scott-” he sighed at his idiocy, “I mean Thunderbird 1-, could pull them out through the top. I pulled out the tower that… you know.”

He was fidgeting with his hands unsurely. He gave Dr Monroe the idea that he had a lot of energy, that sitting down was as natural to him as breakdancing was to bears. She held the tissues out to him and he took one, tearing it absently into tiny pieces with his fingers.

“Is this working?” He asked.

“Do you think it’s working?”

“I don’t know.”

* * *

“Do you mind if I drink this in here?” Virgil asked, a transparent plastic bottle in his hand.

“Depends, is there any liquor in there?”

“No” Virgil laughed, “I don’t drink.”

“What is it?”

“Protein shake. It’s good for working out.”

“Do you mean before or after a work out?”

“Right now? Both.”

Dr Monroe sized him up. This one had muscles on muscles, and even though he’d only seen 4 out of the 5 Tracys, he was willing to bet that this one was the biggest out of all of them.

“Do you usually work out this much?”

“Well I have a lot more free time at the moment, now that international rescue is on ‘temporary leave.’” He rolled his eyes at the last two words then took a sip of his white, tasteless protein shake, “I usually work out in the morning and the afternoon, but, you know. I have all this free time, I should put it towards being stronger.”

“What will being stronger help you achieve?”

“I’ll be able to help more people.”

“Do you think your brothers are strong enough to help people?”

“Yeah” he laughed, “of course!”

“But you don’t think you are?”

Virgil’s gaze dropped and he sighed.

“It’s not like that. I know I’m strong. I’m the strongest out of all of them. It’s just…”

Dr Monroe waited for him to continue, but the rest of his sentence fizzled out of existence.

“Can I have one of those please?”

Dr Monroe picked up the tissue box and leaned it towards Virgil. He took one and wiped moisture off his bottle, then dumped the damp mess into the bin next to the table.

“So you have to be strong to pilot Thunderbird 2?” Dr Monroe asked.

“No, most people at any size could manage. Pilotings actually the easy part of the job.”

“What’s the hardest part?”

Virgil drank the last of his shake and swirled the dregs of wet powder at the bottom.

“Messing up.”

“Do you think you messed up?”

“We all messed up” Virgil muttered bitterly.

“How?”

“We didn’t get them out in time.”

“But you tried to.”

��Yes. And we failed.”

“Would being stronger have changed that?”

“Yes. No? I don’t know.”

* * *

Scott’s hands locked behind the back of his head, his elbows pointing out like a bird of prey. His cheeks were partially red and his eyes were bloodshot and slightly puffy from either waking up before his body was ready, or from crying not too long before the session.

“There were so many people. They looked up and saw Thunderbird 1… saw me… and they thought they were safe.”

“How did you feel, looking down and seeing their eyes on you.”

“It feels like I tricked them.”

“But you didn’t.”

His dishevelled hair showed remnants of gel, but it was flat in some areas and sticking up in others. His blue shirt was wrinkled and there was a small black stain under the pocket that might have been from a broken pen. He appeared to be the most rustled out of all of them, but at the same time he was somehow the most well put together.

“I didn’t mean to trick them. It feels cruel. Felt cruel?”

“Both work.”

“Right.”

“Is there any scenario where you wouldn’t go to help them?”

“No! I’d go every single time.”

“And how would the outcome change if you got a do-over?”

“Everything would be different. I’d go sooner, way before the explosion.”

“But you wouldn’t. John sent the call through and you all left straight away. There is no room for sooner.”

The red spread from Scott’s cheeks and became more vibrant, infecting his ears, forehead and chin. His lips parted and air pushed between them forcefully, his eyes closing from the effort. Tears welled up in the corners and dropped slowly down his cheeks. His hands fell by his sides, curled over the couch cushion fabric. He could feel snot pooling under his nose and wiped it away with the back of his hand. Dr Monroe nudged the box of tissues forward and Scott glanced at it.

“If I couldn’t get there sooner, it means the mission was doomed from the start. We’d fail every. Single. Time.”

“So those deaths were inevitable.”

“No. There is ALWAYS a way.”

“And what’s a way that might have worked here?”

“I-” tears dripped down his neck and into the collar of his shirt, “I could have…”

The fat part of his palms pushed into his eye sockets and rolled around. He’d thought of dozens of ways they could have approached the situation, but now he was supposed to share them, the errors in them all came to the forefront of his brain. Scott sighed without opening his mouth.

“211. We failed to save 211 lives.”

He wiped his palms across his eyes and curled them in his lap. He didn’t want to stain Dr Monroe’s couch.

“That’s a lot of people. How might you have saved them all?”

“I… I don’t know.”

He was still staring blankly at the tissue box, possibly even past it.

“You couldn’t.”

His lip quivered.

“I couldn’t.”

“My job is to help you live with the fact.”

“How do I-” the rest of his sentence was lost in sobs. He buried his face in his hands and leaned forward, his whole back arching from uncontrollable spasms. Dr Monroe had seen every type of patient on that couch, and this type of hard crying was 1 in every 10.

She left him to cry, and he went on for most of the session. That was fine too.

“Sorry” he said, wiping his hands all around his face. He rested his cheek in one of them and caught Dr Monroe’s warm eyes. “I don’t know how to get past this one. You can’t save everyone, but we always save someone.”

“Are you going to quit?”

“What? No!”

“What if you don’t save anyone next time either?”

“I will. I will do everything I can to save them next time!”

“You didn’t last time?”

“Of course I did.”

“But the circumstances were too dire.”

“They were too dire” Scott repeated in agreement. “I couldn’t save them, because the circumstances were too dire. I tried my best, it just wasn’t enough.”

Ugh. He’d been so close.

“What are you going to do with your time off?” Dr Monroe asked, changing the subject.

“Avoid the media, avoid the internet.”

“That’s what your bosses suggested. I mean what are you hoping to do while you’re at home.”

The corners of his mouth twitched.

“I’ll spend time with my brothers. They’re stuck at home too.”

“What will you do with them?”

The barely-there smile disappeared like a trick of the light. Had it ever been there in the first place?

“They aren’t doing well at home. I don’t think I’m supposed to tell you that, but I’m the one trying to keep them, well, themselves. It’s really hard.

John’s taking it the worst. He cries the most out of all of us. Gordon neglected his fish. It died and he buried it on the beach with a cross and everything. He cried in the sand until he passed out and I had to carry him in. Alan’s so quiet I never know where he is. I found him crying in a cupboard this morning, completely silent. I opened it to get a tea-towel, I didn’t know he was even in there! And Virgil… he works himself into exhaustion. He wakes up crying and doesn’t stop until he starts moving again. He went for a run yesterday and didn’t come back. I found him passed out in some bushes halfway around the island. He just… fell asleep, while running! He’s going to hurt himself really badly.

Im just… trying to get them through the day.”

Dr Monroe was taken aback.

“That sounds tiring. Does anyone look after you?”

Scott shook his head and took a few tissues from the box on the table. He wiped away the mess on his face and his hands and dropped them in the bin.

“We all failed 211 people. They think I handle it better than they do… but I just hide it better.”

[pimpedoutgreenears]

Back before season 5 aired, I really wanted to write a fic about Demetri and Eli dealing with their shit while Miguel was in Mexico. I had the vision of them remotely helping Johnny and Robby find Miguel, but also strengthening their relationship through therapy, because let's face it, someone in this show needs a therapy arc. And ofc they'd be going to a couple's therapist because Demetri let Hawk set up the appointment, and that's what made sense to him. And there would have been a bunch of her just objectively looking at the karate wars and being like, wtf? But I never got very far into writing it, and at this point I figure I won't ever go back to finish it. But, I really liked my opening scene, so I figured that I'd throw it into the void here so it doesn't live and die in my drafts.

It’s dark in the arcade, and, on an unconscious level, Demetri is aware that what they say about losing one sense making the rest stronger is indeed correct. He knows because he can smell the sweat around him, hear his own heart thudding over the screaming about finishing him, and feel the tension in his arm that tells him that it’s about to snap.

“Eli, stop! It’s me! It’s me!” words that should mean everything, but they don’t make the hand twisting his arm back release him.

No mercy, right?

He knows his arm is going to be broken— can see it in flashes, can almost prematurely feel the pain, like it’s a phantom of something that’s happened before.

“Stop! I’ll go, I’ll go!” But Eli’s not going to stop.

Eli is going to break his arm. Eli is going to leave him here. Eli isn’t his best friend anymore.

The smell, the screaming, the tension in his arm— it floods his senses. He knows what’s next. Somehow, he knows what’s next.

First the begging, then the…

SNAP

Demetri’s eyes open, and it’s not dark anymore, but his heart is still pounding as his hand darts out from under his blanket, searching for Eli on the air mattress beside his bed.

Demetri supposes that from a logical standpoint it might not make sense that his first reaction to a dream about his best friend breaking his arm (a thing that very much did happen and isn’t at all imaginary) is to reach out said appendage to find said best friend, but he can’t argue with the relief that fills his body when his hand wraps securely around Eli’s inner elbow.

Eli doesn’t flinch and instead reaches up to wrap his hand around Demetri’s elbow (or at least the spot right under it). “Bad dream?” he asks, tone already soft and knowing.

It’s not like Demetri has nightmares every night, but it’s often enough that Eli knows the signs by now. They’ve been living like they share lungs all summer.

“Yeah,” Demetri admits as he takes Eli in. The hand that isn’t holding his arm is holding his phone, a telltale sign that he’s been awake and waiting on Demetri to follow suit. “I’d tell you about it, but frankly they’re just boring at this point. You’d think the karate wars would have given me more interesting material.”

Eli’s thumb runs gently over his skin, a silent comfort before he says, “Yeah, who’d have thought trauma would be so boring.” It’s a half-hearted response, whether because he wants to say something more helpful or because he worries the dream is about him, Demetri doesn’t know.

He figures they’ll both be happier not knowing. They can save the honestly for therapy.

He switches to a new train of thought, even as his hand stays wrapped around Eli (He’ll let go when he’s ready, when he’s had his fill of the reassurance of his best friend’s skin— which is only a creepy thought if one voices it, which Demetri does not). “Any updates from the rescue team?”

Eli sighs, keeping his hold on Demetri even as he looks at his phone with a frown. He’s looking at a map, a red dot on it that represents Sensei Lawrence and Robby. “No, but they’ve been stopped at a bar for a while.”

Demetri can tell that he’s trying to hide the anxiety he feels surrounding their missing friend, so he squeezes his elbow and then does what he does best— commentary. “Oh, is it time for Sensei Lawrence’s breakfast beer already? I hear he can’t drive without one.”

Eli sighs again. Demetri wishes it was because of his mean joke, but he knows it’s not. “They should have found Miguel by now.”

Worry fills Demetri’s stomach too, but he refuses to humor it. For once he doesn’t want to be the one talking about all of the bad things that could be happening. “Come on, man, those two? We didn’t exactly send the dream team on this one,” Demetri says before realizing that probably wasn’t as reassuring as he meant it to be. “What I mean is, you have two capable guys who are… very emotionally constipated. When you factor in stops for family drama, they’re making good time.”

“We should have gone,” Hawk says, not for the first time since they’d found out that Miguel had left the country. It’d taken a lot for Eli not to jump on his bike and go. Demetri is pretty sure that had they not been together when they found out, Eli would be in Mexico too.

“Hey, we’ve been over this,” Demetri says softly, squeezing his friend’s arm again. “We can’t all just run to Mexico, and Sensei Lawrence beat us to the punch. Plus, with Miguel dealing with the whole dad thing… Well, we’re not exactly the father figure he’s looking for.”

Eli sighs again but this time in acceptance. “I just hate waiting.” Demetri watches as Eli looks at the dot again. It still isn’t moving.

“I know; me too,” Demetri admits before forcing a smile. “But hey, at least we get to play tech guy on operation ‘Star-crossed Fathers.’”

“That name sucks worse than the last one,” Eli says, a small smile forming.

“The right one will come, my friend. Mark my words.”