#euporie answers

[euporie-art]

Hellooo there!! I saw your blog description and I am a benbaro shipper who would like to interact with you please! My benbaro obsession has gotten well fed by wonderful artworks and correct thoughts such as yours (thank you!!) recently but I fear my obsession can never be completely sated...

So if you like, feel free to use this ask to express whatever is currently on your mind! Just ramblings or a headcanon or something about benbaro or Barok or Albert separately or TGAA in general that you have thoughts about; this is a free pass to let it out! I'm always curious about how my blorbos look in other people's eyes

OMG HI I have read all of your benbaro fics and they make me fucking AJDJFHWIJFKTOEMTK (a good thing) . I need to get hit by a car. I love them so much

prepare for a whole lot of fucking yap because I am insane about them so much. and I have no job so I kinda just stew them in my brain all day at the moment, among other tgaa pairings and characters

(i honestly very rarely fixate on ships within fandoms. but tgaa gave me 3 pairings I would die for. asoryuu, homumiko, and benbaro. they all make me insane I'm going to eat drywall)

I think about them a lot. I don't even know where to start.

so I'll go w some dumb headcanons. sprinkling in some pretty bad drawings.tbh (please ignore how inconsistent my art style is)

I think some time after tgaa2 he moves back to England and lives with barok, who obviously has more than enough money to spend on him, so Albert grows his hair out again (he has a very stupid hat/helmet thing he wears to protect his hair if he's working on something potentially dangerous)

First off I think Albert had long hair in university. most of the time when people draw him in uni he looks almost identical to his 2-3 design WHICH IS FAIR AND NOT BAD! but I have some thoughts of my own

pray forgive the discourtesy of this looking shit I drew it quite quickly. but. I think he had long hair in university and was a little more particular about his appearance. however i do think he had pretty bad acne in his late teens. the acne was just a hormonal teenager thing and cleared up by his 20s.

After moving abroad I think he cut his hair short because he had less time to look after it, and wanted to put any money he had towards funding his inventions, so he did pretty much the bare minimum when it came to looking after himself (I must clarify I do think that Albert is attractive, this is not me trying to "yassify" him. I have a soft spot for cute nerdy guys I'm dating one but he likes Elden ring instead of science)

because he's pretty much been alone for like. a decade. and basically just spoke in Law Words for half of that. I think barok is very direct and literal with how he speaks so he worries about not seeming "romantic" enough, so to compensate he's very physically affectionate and likes spoiling albert with nice food, gadgets and supplies for his inventions, and new clothes.

I think barok is extremely clingy once he gets used to having Albert around again. he's like a cat he'll just kind of bonk his head into him sometimes and sadly gaze at him until he gets attention. very cuddly and a bit melodramatic. I love characterisations of barok where he's really pathetic tbh. also him being shy is fun I enjoy it greatly

albert on the other hand I actually think he's the more bold/confident one (I hate when barok is portrayed as a dominant bad boy or whatever its so stupid he literally gets shy when his 10 year old niece invites him to dinner). albert talks baroks ear off about anything and everything, humours his clingyness, and drags him outside to have a life beyond his job and engage in whimsy and fun . he's also very verbally affectionate I think. he makes sure to try and help barok feel less alone, because I think he has lingering guilt for not being there during the professor bullshit and klints death. it may have been after he left England for Germany, and he didn't even know when it was happening, but i think he has a lingering, irrational guilt for not being there for barok at his worst hour

ALSO a lot of the time I see people drawing Albert talking a lot about science shit w barok listening happily, but I also think it goes the other way too! I think barok will rant about wine pairings and different types of grapes n shit. Albert stares at him lovestruck and adoringly the whole time. he has no idea what a pinot noir is (neither do I, I don't drink)

final thing or I will be here all fucking day: my boyfriend and I came up with a headcanon that barok has a really pathetic looking Italian greyhound named petunia, he likes dressing her up in little outfits. I think when albert starts living with him he starts calling petunia their daughter, and has the ability to make the exact same sad and pathetic expression as the dog

jk tiny bonus: I have a very dumb "100 years on" au stewing in my brain where everything is set in the 1980s and 1990s instead of 1880s and 1890s. in the 80s section, when barok and Albert are in university together, barok is a sulky and mopey trad goth and they listen to The Cure together. albert dresses normal and listens to talking heads i think. this is stupidly self indulgent because I like 80s fashion and clothing. I have not even thought about the 90s section because I don't want to 😊 (I HATE 90S FASHION.)

[barschter000]

(this is my main blog I am @euporie-art)

hi I am sorry 2 bother you but whenever you reblog my art you always put very nice tags on it and it makes me quite happy

I am thinking. about vampire benbaro. do you have any thoughts on them.

Hello!!!!! You're no bother at all, I'm actually very happy to hear from you again!! :D

I'm glad my silly reblog tag ramblings can make you happy! :)

I actually (and unfortunately) don't have that many thoughts on them (edit from the future: yeah sure buddy) because I don't think about Vampire AUs very often even though it's a classic and it works great with them. Generally, I absolutely agree that Albert should be the vampire because that is 100% the funnier option. Otherwise, my thoughts overlap with this post and are as follows:

Albert has a tapetum lucidum on his eyes, the thing animals with improved night vision have that makes their eyes glow when hit by light. I'm always a big fan of Albert being a little weird and freaky.

Since bats eat fruit and insects too and Albert is pretty constantly low on food (see linked post), he has eaten bugs. He regrets it sometimes but they are a good source for protein.

For funsies, I like to imagine him being able to walk up walls Hotel Transylvania-style because he is definitely the type of guy to start pacing while thinking and so he ends up on the ceiling.

I am consultung old Discord messages about this for this answer and past me said that apparently bats are colorblind (though it might not be all of them) and so Albert is too!

Absolute favorite of mine: BATS CAN PURR!! ALBERT CAN PURR!!!

Here are some more or less useful biting places: The most useful and sensible one is of course the vein in the crook of Barok's arm which isn't very romantic but practical. The jugular veins in the throat are of course a classic among vampire enthusiasts but because there is so much blood flowing through it, it would definitely require medical attention afterwards. But one can alter reality in fiction, as a treat. Also there is the femoral artery that runs through the thigh and aside from it being hard to access (especially since Barok's legs are so muscular), I think Barok would die and not only from bloodloss. Other than that, the saliva of vampire bats contains anticoagulants that prevent blood from clotting, so that's in Albert's saliva too.

Albert can communicate with the bats in Barok's office. (In my world, Barok named them all after female characters from operas because he doesn't know which bat is male or female but he noticed they were reproducing, so he just gave them female names. Perhaps Albert can clear up the mystery.)

Since Albert doesn't really have blood unless he feeds, he doesn't really have body heat but when he's fed, he is also able to blush and I think seeing your boy best friend blushing with your own blood inside his cheeks would also kill Barok.

As I mentioned in our previous benbaro thought exchange, I take Barok as having been a huge vampire nerd, so having a vampire boyfriend is like a dream come true to him. It also opens new possibilities of taking care of and protecting Albert which he likes doing because it's an easier way for him to express that he cares about him.

Also here is a meme I made because I think Albert would travel most safely in daylight as a bat and to not lose him in the busy streets of London, Barok puts him in his breastpocket.

On a final note, here is my favorite vampire!Albert fic!

Pray forgive the discourtesy of this being more ben than baro or benbaro throughts, I hope me loving to think about the logistics of non-human stuff was still entertaining. I'd love to hear your vampire benbaro thoughts!! :)

[figjelly]

@saberwitch replied to your post: @saberwitch replied to your post: I’m up late... I know it was a dumb ask so thanks for answering it even though HOLY FUCK 67 MOONS BEING A WEREWOLF ON JUPITER WOULD FUCKING SUCK

Okay, so let’s break it down: 1 Jupiter year (revolution around the sun) ~= 12 Earth years (on Jupiter, I’m still a toddler which makes a lot of fucking sense actually) 1 Jupiter day (rotation on axis) ~= 10 hours Breakdown of 63/67 moons cycles around Jupiter: 1 Metis 7h 4m 29s 2 Adrastea 7h 9m 30s 3 Amalthea 11h 57m 22.67s 4 Thebe 16h 11m 17s 5 Io 1.77 days 6 Europa 3.55 days 7 Ganymede 7.15 days 8 Callisto 16.69 days 9 Themisto 129.87 days 10 Leda 241.75 days 11 Himalia 250.37 days 12 Lysithea 259.89 days 13 Elara 261.14 days 14 S/2000 J 11 287.93 days 15 Carpo 458.62 days 16 S/2003 J 12 482.69 days 17 Euporie 538.78 days 18 S/2003 J 3 561.52 days 19 S/2003 J 18 569.73 days 20 Thelxinoe 597.61 days 21 Euanthe 598.09 days 22 Helike 601.40 days 23 Orthosie 602.62 days 24 Iocaste 609.43 days 25 S/2003 J 16 610.36 days 26 Praxidike 613.90 days 27 Harpalyke 624.54 days 28 Mneme 627.48 days 29 Hermippe 629.81 days 30 Thyone 639.80 days 31 Ananke 642.02 days 32 S/2003 J 17 672.75 days 33 Aitne 679.64 days 34 Kale 685.32 days 35 Taygete 686.67 days 36 S/2003 J 19 699.12 days 37 Chaldene 699.33 days 38 S/2003 J 15 699.68 days 39 S/2003 J 10 700.13 days 40 S/2003 J 23 700.54 days 41 Erinome 711.96 days 42 Aoede 714.66 days 43 Kallichore 717.81 days 44 Kalyke 721.02 days 45 Carme 721.82 days 46 Callirrhoe 722.62 days 47 Eurydome 723.36 days 48 Pasithee 726.93 days 49 Cyllene 731.10 days 50 Eukelade 735.20 days 51 S/2003 J 4 739.29 days 52 Pasiphaë 741.09 days 53 Hegemone 745.50 days 54 Arche 746.19 days 55 Isonoe 750.13 days 56 S/2003 J 9 752.84 days 57 S/2003 J 5 758.34 days 58 Sinope 762.33 days 59 Sponde 771.60 days 60 Autonoe 772.17 days 61 S/2003 J 14 776.02 days 62 Megaclite 792.44 days 63 S/2003 J 2 1077.02 days  Basically, you’d end up with different subspecies of werewolves with this fucking system. Some would be purebred Arche Werewolves (once about every two years, lavish ceremony). Some would be changing all the fucking time (honestly, those first three moons would make sure you’d be in werewolf mode all the time so maybe Jovian Werewolves are just the natural order of things???). Yeah, just pretend Jupiter is nothing but werewolves. (Also, I feel like I should make an obligatory aside that Jupiter Ascending is amazing).

[euporie-art]

yo I saw you reposted my OC, thank you! I wanted to ask if you have TGAA OCs too ^^

I DO. I HAVE AN EMBARRASSING AMOUNT.

A lot of them are just like. ocs to fill in gaps in canon (like kazumas mum, Ryunosukes parents, how the naruhodo bloodline went from Ryunosuke to phoenix) (I also have the dumb headcanon that hosonaga is related to the Edgeworths distantly and ive been working on that too) but I do also have a fancase I'm working on with my boyfriend surrounding a welsh hunter with a mysterious benefactor who hired Ryunosuke for defence

[euporie-art]

Herlock Sholmes eats soap and there's nothing we can do to stop him

real and true.... real and true....