#essential data
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"i am 15% scandinavian 18% french 3% eastern europea-" okay well i will kill 100% of you
#even if you removed the whole evil corporation/data harvesting aspect from ancestry tests#the way people's immediate response is racial essentialism is.......... mh#are you guys not creeped the fuck out by these things. or at the very least weirded out#and that is not to say that there absolutely isn't a 'healthy' way to interact with them#- again removing the whole dna data collection aspect from the convo -#but it does seem to me that the overwhelming majority turns to this weird essentialism bit which makes me barf#but it seems to be weirdly acceptable/accepted behavior
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If you don't frequent my coding streams I feel like you maybe won't appreciate the last 3 hours of my life. So here's a hopefully-comprehensible explanation:
Started a new project, adding a manager AI to Minecraft villages so they can grow and expand as needed without player intervention. Call the project Hrrmowners because it's a perfect name with no issues.
Step one, naturally, is to make the infrastructure for actually understanding the layout of a village, so I make a quick system that tells me all the bounding boxes of the structures used to build villages during world generation.
Then realise that I'm actually highlighting every single structure in the game. So I need to filter things down a bit.
It takes me about an hour to find any shred of information in the disparate and convoluted world generation infrastructure of the game to have even the first clue what spawned building is part of a village. Not anything else, just if its intended to be part of one. This still catches pillager outposts, and ancient cities for some godforsaken reason.
Figure that there must be a gameplay element or two that specifically are handled by villager objects. Maybe it doesn't have all the information I need, but it might have something useful for this early stage of development.
Iron Golems spawn in villages, but it's actually the villager AI that does it, and it doesn't care about an actual village.
Cats only spawn in villages (and witch huts), and they have a spawner object in the world data. Could this be the clue I need? No, because it doesn't actually reference any kind of village data object, it just checks for occupied beds nearby via the points of interest storage of the world.
"Points of interest" are a system of noteworthy positions in the world added in 1.14, aka the Village & Pillage update, and basically let villagers reserve a bed to sleep in and a workstation to treat as its job. Every point of interest is a tile entity that gets loaded in a separate list when the chunk is restored from memory, so the world never needs to know anything about its own terrain to know where those points actually are. It just adds them in whenever the chunk spawns.
Notably removed in 1.14 is the villages.dat file in every world save. It contained the locations of every building in the village. That was fed into a Village object in world memory to monitor stuff like iron golems spawning.
It doesn't exist anymore. "Villages" as a concept, only actually exist in the world generation step, and then nothing knows or defines what they are.
TLDR: As of Minecraft 1.14, in the Village & Pillage update, the mobs named villagers actually have absolutely no clue what a village actually is.
#minecraft#lying talks#essentially the best I could do#with the data available to vanilla#is make a heatmap that Implies where villages are#but with hardly any notion of its actual layout
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do we have any word yet on why the internet archive was attacked?
#glad to hear their data is intact but damn it has not been a good few years for internet archive huh#given how essential their service is i really fucking hope they bounce back
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💫 Join the Fediverse! 💫
Greetings, fellow bloggers! We welcome you to join us in discovering, honoring, and promoting the potential future of social networking—commonly referred to as the "Fediverse."
The Fediverse, or Federation Universe, refers to a collective of online platforms that utilize the web protocol known as ActivityPub, which has set a standard of excellence in regards to both protecting and respecting users' online privacies.
There's a good chance in the past few years that you've caught wind of the fedi family's critically acclaimed Mastodon; however, there are many other unique platforms worth your consideration...
✨ Where To Begin?
Conveniently enough, from the minds of brilliant independent developers, there already likely exists a Fediverse equivalent to your favorite socials. Whether it's an opinion from the critics, or from the community alike—the following popular websites are commonly associated with one another:
Friendica 🐰 = Facebook Mastodon 🐘 = Twitter Pixelfed 🐼 = Instagram PeerTube 🐙 = YouTube Lemmy 🐭 = Reddit
It's worth mentioning, too, a few other sites and forks thereof that are worthy counterparts, which be: Pleroma 🦊 & Misskey 🐱, microblogs also similar to Twitter/Mastodon. Funkwhale 🐋 is a self-hosting audio streamer, which pays homage to the once-popular GrooveShark. For power users, Hubzilla 🐨 makes a great choice (alongside Friendica) when choosing macroblogging alternatives.
✨ To Be Clear...
To address the technicalities: aside from the "definitive" Fediverse clients, we will also be incorporating any platforms that utilize ActivityPub-adjacent protocols as well. These include, but are not limited to: diaspora*; AT Protocol (Bluesky 🦋); Nostr; OStatus; Matrix; Zot; etc. We will NOT be incorporating any decentralized sites that are either questionably or proven to be unethical. (AKA: Gab has been exiled.)
✨ Why Your Privacy Matters
You may ask yourself, as we once did, "Why does protecting my online privacy truly matter?" While it may seem innocent enough on the surface, would it change your mind that it's been officially shared by former corporate media employees that data is more valuable than money to these companies? Outside of the ethical concerns surrounding these concepts, there are many other reasons why protecting your data is critical, be it: security breaches which jeopardize your financial info and risk identity theft; continuing to feed algorithms which use psychological manipulation in attempts to sell you products; the risk of spyware hacking your webcams and microphones when you least expect it; amongst countless other possibilities that can and do happen to individuals on a constant basis. We wish it could all just be written off as a conspiracy... but, with a little research, you'll swiftly realize the validity of these claims are not to be ignored any longer. The solution? Taking the decentralized route.
✨ Our Mission For This Blog
Our mission for establishing this blog includes 3 core elements:
To serve as a hub which anybody can access in order to assist themselves in either: becoming a part of the Fediverse, gaining the resources/knowledge to convince others to do the very same, and providing updates on anything Fedi-related.
We are determined to do anything within our power to prevent what the future of the Internet could become if active social users continue tossing away their data, all while technologies are advancing at faster rates with each passing year. Basically we'd prefer not to live in a cyber-Dystopia at all costs.
Tumblr (Automattic) has expressed interest in switching their servers over to ActivityPub after Musk's acquisition of then-Twitter, and are officially in the transitional process of making this happen for all of us. We're hoping our collective efforts may at some point be recognized by @staff, which in turn will encourage their efforts and stand by their decision.
With that being stated, we hope you decide to follow us here, and decide to make the shift—as it is merely the beginning. We encourage you to send us any questions you may have, any personal suggestions, or corrections on any misinformation you may come across.
From the Tender Hearts of, ✨💞 @disease & @faggotfungus 💞✨
#JOIN THE FEDIVERSE#fediverse#decentralization#internet privacy#social media#social networks#FOSS#activitypub#mastodon#fedi#big data#degoogle#future technology#cybersecurity#technology#essential reading
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I have a fun headcanon that bots can actually be regressed back into protoforms/sparklings via transferring their spark into a fresh protoform body.
I mean, its not entirely a headcanon given that this is at least partially canon in some continuities, but what I mean is that they can quite literally be temporarily reverted back into what is essentially babies for a time.
More importantly though is what exactly the limitation of this would be/are. Like, for instance, if the spark is transferred to a new body without their brain module or anything else, do they retain their memories? Does their life essentially just reboot? Do they experience the giant alien robot equivalent of puberty twice?
I just feel like this is one of those concepts in canon that could get zanier in the hands of fans.
#maccadam#like i think in beast wars and animated sparks could be wholesale transferred between bodies#but i dont recall the exact details#and in those cases i think they went straight into being full on adults with their memories intact?#I mean what if the process isnt done a lot because it legitimately reboots the persons ENTIRE life?#Memories gone#personality essentially changed#some of the functioning data remains but thats it#Its like yeah its the same spark but its not he same PERSON ya know?#transformers protoform#transformers lore
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thank you for your service, fiskars eight inch non-stick titanium softgrip scissors
you lived, ready-to-hand, in the hone slot of my knife block and together, for the last six years and seventy five days, we have opened bags and boxes, snipped ties and tape, shaped paper and cloth. sometimes though, i asked more of you, we trimmed the woody stems of herbs, we pruned the branches of plants, and as your final task, we cut through the rib cage of a spatchcocking spring chicken. i tried to repair your broken handle, but it was not to be. for now your slot sits empty. you will be missed
#converting the essential features of high dimensional data into lower dimensional representations with desirable properties#there was nothing in the refrigerator but a six pack and a knife#i saw a bat hunting in daylight#being-in-the-world#memento mori#worn souls#scissors#sleeping titans#i want to be a turtle when i grow up#second blue moon epoch#first spring
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something that had always been really frustrating for me when i was still in math classes in school was trying to watch the teacher actually work the problem out on the board and still not understanding wtf was happening. for some context, i heavily suspect that i have some form of dyscalculia because math and numbers literally do not compute properly in my brain. it'd be too long to explain the full extent of my possible dyscalculia here but math literally does the mental equivalent of maxing out the CPU power and memory of a computer to the point where it freezes and lags to my brain.
math class was always stressful for me because no matter what i did and how much progress i made, there was always a lack of understanding i had when it came to trying to work any math problem out long term and remembering anything. it felt like there was always something i was missing, so when the time came for the teacher to explain and go through a math problem step-by-step on the whiteboard, i made sure i paid as much attention to it as humanly possible as child-to-teenager me could muster and even then i still did not understand how the fuck they solved it, all because of one thing: the teacher pulling a random number completely out of their ass that happened to be the key to solving the problem.
like. i don't think i can illustrate how frustrating and isolating this was to experience with words alone. here i was, paying as much attention as i physically could, trying my damned hardest to memorise each individual step and calculation in order to understand how to get from point A to point B. everything made perfect sense up until the teacher suddenly stops for a second and writes a seemingly completely unrelated number there with no context as to why it's there in the first place, and then, in that singular moment, everything immediately comes crumbling down and i'm left completely confused. and somehow, everyone else around me perfectly understands it except me. like. imagine sitting there, giving the teacher all the attention you possibly could, literally watching and studying their hand movements just to understand every single step, only to be even more confused than your classmates, who you're pretty sure were half-asleep during the explanation, who also say they understand how the teacher came to that conclusion. what. the actual fuck.
when i try to explain how infinitely confusing and irritating this was for me, i'm reminded of a quote from that video Patricia Taxxon made about DHMIS: "The rug is pulled again ... There was never any hope of following the thread, understanding is impossible.". even when i was literally trying my best to possibly follow anything that was happening, the rug still gets pulled out from under my feet and i'm sent all the way back to square one of not understanding a single thing and being confused again. all because the teacher didn't explicitly explain how they got that random number that was apparently singlehandedly necessary for solving the equation and where they got it from, apart from that place being from literally fucking nowhere.
it's really no wonder that i eventually stopped giving a shit about paying attention in math class, because even when i was, it was still daunting and incomprehensible as always. why bother trying anymore when trying still gets you nowhere? trying to ask the teacher where they got that number from was an impossible to understand task as well, as their either snapped back with a "well you should have been paying attention" (even though i WAS but whatever) or they do explain that they added the first two numbers from the equation together or something, but now i'm wondering why they didn't just explain that in the first place like they did with everything else instead of seemingly just assuming everyone would know to do that.
by the way, if i had to give an estimate, my math ability is probably still at like. a 5th grader's level at best. so uh. yeah it's not good. still, it is kinda funny to me though, not only because i do find a bit of humour in the situation, but also because some people are often so quick to judge someone's intelligence purely based on their mathematical abilities alone. like. the idea of someone calling me dumb for still needing to do addition with my fingers despite the fact that my reading and language levels are considered above average is really funny to me lmaooo
#dyscalculia#math anxiety#i was NOT having fun in math class when i was still in school loollll#to this day i still don't know all my times tables#i just know the essential ones like my 2s 5s and 10s#the others i only really partially remember but i still can't actually do beyond multiples of 12#like i partially know what they are but i can't actually DO them in my head without needing to sit there for a minute or two#i can't do quick maths. i just can't do that. there are too many numbers to keep track of and count at once to do quickly.#like i can't just conjure up a number like a fucken genie like other people seem to do. i need to like. actually count first#i hate quick maths games so much dude. it's so stressful. i physically cannot keep up with it and it's really frustrating and unfun#it's the same when people tell me to do an equation really quickly. like first of all fuck you#and second of all my brain WILL short circuit#anyway yeah this is a vent#making this not rebloggable for that reason..... sorry fellas#i'm still hoping other people with dyscalculia may find this relatable or cathartic#god how that particia taxxon quote strikes my very soul so so much.....#the entire video is really good but that quote specifically. holy shit#understanding is impossible. that is how i feel. that perfectly explains how i feel about math. understanding is impossible. wow.#i feel like data repeating ''i am not less perfect than lore'' to himself about that quote. understanding is impossible.#that is how i have felt about math for such a long fucking time oh my god#understanding anything to do with math and numbers feels impossibly incomprehensible for me.#basic concepts make sense. i understand how the four basic operations work. i just can't understand much else from that.#too many numbers overflow my brain#it takes literal actual power to be able to do one sheet of equations for me#i might not even finish it just because it's so difficult and uninteresting for me#i'm rambling again auahgh. the basic point of this post is that i don't understand math and math teachers don't understand how to make-#-any basic fucking sense. apparently. anyway yeah official steakout dyscalculia coming out post (i probably have it)#(i'm not diagnosed yet but i'm 80% sure i have it)#(the other 20% is me gaslighting myself) (augh)
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I would very much like to infoblast about Raven Beak's powersuit upgrade library with all the optimizations, QoL tweaks, security features, and the myriad integration systems Samus is currently lacking with her babby suit, but alas. Time restrictions.
#txt#not art#don't get me wrong it's a good suit. but samus is running on old hardware (ruins test suit) that's literally been dissected (Fusion)#and augmented by comparatively inferior (at least in Raven Beak's 'humble' opinion) GalFed tech#and she's had her arsenal stripped down to the hard-coded essentials more times than should be possible for any reasonable warrior#barring the whole 'Metroid powers ate my firmware updates' thing from Dread#Raven Beak looks at that technical hodge podge of a suit which can apparently have some features remotely restricted by the Feds at will#and he's like 'girl you need an upgrade'#he can understand the whole Metroid DNA eating your suit thing but the rest of it he chalks up to the powersuit equivalent#of a faulty hard drive being dropped on the hard dirty ground and all of the data within going the way of the Titanic#he's like a gazillion years old so all he sees is an eight year old dropping their Gameboy Advance SP with Pokemon Crystal in the game slot#staring blankly at the screen as they boot up the system to find that their entire save is gone
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so in this universe because the magnus institute was burnt to the ground, does that mean the government knows about The Horrors and is using them to target certain people?
#something about the eye being in a government data base#something about a flesh (?) avatar and a hunt avatar being essentially assassins#the magnus protocol theory#the magnus protocol#tmagp
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What Are the Qualifications for a Data Scientist?
In today's data-driven world, the role of a data scientist has become one of the most coveted career paths. With businesses relying on data for decision-making, understanding customer behavior, and improving products, the demand for skilled professionals who can analyze, interpret, and extract value from data is at an all-time high. If you're wondering what qualifications are needed to become a successful data scientist, how DataCouncil can help you get there, and why a data science course in Pune is a great option, this blog has the answers.
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Apart from technical skills, understanding the industry you work in is a major asset. Whether it’s healthcare, finance, or e-commerce, knowing how data applies within your industry will set you apart from the competition. DataCouncil's data science course in Pune is designed to offer case studies from multiple industries, helping students gain domain-specific insights.
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#In today's data-driven world#the role of a data scientist has become one of the most coveted career paths. With businesses relying on data for decision-making#understanding customer behavior#and improving products#the demand for skilled professionals who can analyze#interpret#and extract value from data is at an all-time high. If you're wondering what qualifications are needed to become a successful data scientis#how DataCouncil can help you get there#and why a data science course in Pune is a great option#this blog has the answers.#The Key Qualifications for a Data Scientist#To succeed as a data scientist#a mix of technical skills#education#and hands-on experience is essential. Here are the core qualifications required:#1. Educational Background#A strong foundation in mathematics#statistics#or computer science is typically expected. Most data scientists hold at least a bachelor’s degree in one of these fields#with many pursuing higher education such as a master's or a Ph.D. A data science course in Pune with DataCouncil can bridge this gap#offering the academic and practical knowledge required for a strong start in the industry.#2. Proficiency in Programming Languages#Programming is at the heart of data science. You need to be comfortable with languages like Python#R#and SQL#which are widely used for data analysis#machine learning#and database management. A comprehensive data science course in Pune will teach these programming skills from scratch#ensuring you become proficient in coding for data science tasks.#3. Understanding of Machine Learning
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I need my boss to sign off on a time sensitive project but she's at a conference so I don't know when she'll respond ;~;
#i need it done by EOD#btw these people cannot build a survey to save their lives#every time they submit a new scorecard/edits they've made it more complex and less useable in terms of data#“was the team member available to answer your questions AND did they explain things AND did they ask for feedback”#at the point where there are 3 metrics in a single question a yes/no answer is essentially meaningless#it's a 3 point question JUST SPLIT IT UP#or make it multi choice#goddamn it's not hard
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so, i just found out that MS Excel has a feature where it could keep track of hours spent editing a workbook, but it's essentially a nonactive feature. Which is ridiculous. Anyone who spends hours in spreadsheets would no doubt love to see their personal stats and its so silly that its only almost a feature.
#i've been compiling this spreadsheet for work#and it has taken HOURS of my own time#and like i do it bc i love spreadsheets and if youre gonna do something do it right#but i would love to know how many hours it has been#i have to bet at least 50#im so close to finishing the document#its a reference resource - essentially delivery costs by various couriers listing all towns within about 400km N S and W and 150km East#the couriers only provide pricing for between 20 and 100 listed destinations and I have to extrapolate for the rest of the 700 towns#im so close to finishing with the data side of it and then i just have final formatting before printing
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i wish either my lab friends were online people or i could post about my work here so i could share my project specific memes that live in my head
#mainly because ive been fucking with these cells so bad they are suffering terribly#they are meme worthingly defective. like GMOs gone too far#if i could post pictures of my cells you would all get the meme potential but unfortunately thats like unpublished data in a niche field#they are so fucked up when i showed my PI he didnt recognjze they were cells at first#WOE DIVISION DEFECTS BE UPON YE etc#i would love to like have a pic of my fucked up cells like 'what if you wanted to grow in a human host but gd said#express crispri machinery and knockdown your own essential gene'#or oh lord you know the sperm meme like 'do you think we're inside xyz'#it wld be like 'i cant wait to infect this human!' 'bro we're inside the electroporator'
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important life lessons learned today: true freedom is the absence of choice, therefore i must do all my thinking up front
#and that is finally turning into a schedule system that actually accommodates my goals#it has taken me a long time and several attempts to come up with one#because I'm essentially trying to rotate 3 basic schedules#and i always get stuck on the trying to decide what to do part more so than the making time#but i think i've finally got it#or im at least close and this next experiment will yield good data for further improvement
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PLEASE CONTINUE RAMBLING ABT MISSINGNO I WANNA HEAR MORE OF UR THOUGHTSSS
basically, the missingno ramble came about bc i always thought that initially, pokemon were always supposed to be able to be turned into data and shit. eg, how pokeballs even work, how the pc works, how trading works, etc.
this is kind of long ( not really but a few paragraphs ( nevermind i made it longer. ) ) so im gunna put it under a readmore just so i dont irritate ppl in whatever tags i put this in
idk if theres evidence for this, it just feels like pokemon implied that more and has been recently backtracking and going "oh no theyre not actually like DATA lol." and kind of retconning it. but maybe im pulling all of this out my ass but idk it felt early gen pokemon was much more in that sort of direction. there were a lot of different directions in early gen pokemon in general, i feel
ANYWAYS given that i subscribe to that more than whatever theyre doing with the canon explanations for shit now ( also not helped by my general fascination with technology, ai, and glitches esp in fiction and how interesting they are if written well ), i think missingno is just . a glitched pokemon. which obviously. but. Like. it used to be a pokemon. they can be made easily if something fucks up in the data transfer from physical to pokeball or pc or during trading or something like that.
well, maybe not easily- i imagine missingnos are only made from particularly bad cases of this. complete malfunctions and breaks, probably. which would also be why missingno and glitch pokemon like the bad egg, M', female symbol, ? symbol, whatever other ones you can think of were much more prominent early gen and pittered out more in later games ( not entirely obviously, but yknow ) - technology advanced more and became more secure so these types of things happened less often.
and i think in terms of possible mew clone, they are clones of mew that could not turn into ditto because an error happened technologically. instead of biologically/physically, which is how ditto wouldve been made. why are they in the shore? who knows. maybe theyre kind of thoughtless and just somehow get physically dumped into the cinnabar shore. god knows why its kind of hard to integrate game glitch to actual story/lore but by god im doing it.
anyways. because of this in strangled red, i think missingno isnt an all powerful entity. i think its just something that fills miki's corpse with garbage data and puppets her around like a zombie. which would be oddly fitting for a pokemon that i think could be caused by a trading fiasco or other technological malfunctions that happen to pokemon in those sorts of things.
miki just got the worse of it physically, not glitch-wise. she just died. which, at least she got to go out and not be in eternal limbo. until, well, steven stepped in, but who knows if shes even sentient enough or if her soul is even in missingno-ified miki at all. i think its slightly there, just a fragment of it- but its mostly a husk.
when the trading incident happened, i imagine that if there's an error the failsafe in whatever trading mech you use immediately sends the pokemon back to the original trainers, but something screwed up in the wiring so she likely turned physical at the wrong time while still in the trading tube, which then ended up with the wires being wrapped around her neck, or maybe even stabbing into it.
i like to think in the strangled red universe it's a not very common thing that maybe even was the first or only reported incident. steven and mike just got extremely unlucky.
... which probably did not help stevens rage about the incident, losing his prized unique charizard who could evolve faster than any charmander ever has, and tank supereffective damage easily amongst other things and to the fact that it probably only happened to him. or at minimum a few other people ever.
why does steven know about missingno? likely tales when he was in cinnabar during his original journey about it. strangled red is a year or so before the canon story but i doubt the mewtwo thing happened exactly a year before reds story, so missingno still being there. yknow. makes sense if you think it exists like how ditto does. ( failed mew clone ) .
the only reason missingno has power is because it is a glitch, it is corruption, physicalized - in a way it was not meant to be even further than how a glitch is. pokemon can turn into data. you can see how that'd work. anything that can be digitized in the pokemon world, it has power over. i imagine something thats meant to be there like a normal pokemon or human would get corrupted by it if it touched or remained in an area too long, or if it were commanded to attack. which is why missingnos in universe have insane levels, odd or stolen cries ( along with the fact some of them just used to be a normal pokemon likely ), and are physically just a jumble of data or taking images from random pokemons appearances, and even the skeletons or ghosts of them.
ironically they are like miki, but if miki after the incident corrupted digitally and physically, and went into a state of limbo instead of outright just dying due to technical malfunctions. they probably barely remember their former lives or what they were supposed to be and become very mindless.
i also think this has interesting implications for the trade incident if it ever happened again with pokemon with trade evolutions. i don't think they'd die, i think they'd become corrupted in a similar but different way to missingno - like an unintentional and glitchy evolution akin to porygon-z.
anyways.
steven is desperate for anything and everything to bring her back, and maybe tried multiple methods beforehand if you think he was that desperate, but hey. missingno worked. even if miki's just a puppeted corpse being controlled by a mindless thing that used to be a pokemon. who is ironically, controlling a corpse of a pokemon.
#wispy chatters#strangled red miki#headcanons#missingno#strangled red steven#thank you all for indulging my insanity i am very autistic about this.#tldr. missingno is a fucked up glitch pokemon that happens when something in the pokemon-to-data transfer malfunctions essentially#they get stuck in eternal limbo and kind of are zombies but like... digitalized glitchy zombies. that have barely any memory of who they ar#and barely any consciousness
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I feel like if one wants — and is trying to give themself — a mental disorder by using the label of “transid,” then they are probably already disordered in some other way that they are in denial of; because it‘s more stigmatized, or “less interesting” than the neurotype they’ve chosen to mimic… which is sad because they’re masking in two different directions at that point: one to hide their illness, the other to create an illness… which will lead to more illness. Bleak, to be honest.
#I kind of used to be like that as a kid. I claimed to have “multiple personalities” when I didn’t…#my brain just attaches characters to thoughts as a form of organization; and at that time the different concepts were “warring”#(AKA: I was trying to make logical sense of information when I had zero critical thinking skills because I was raised in a cult)#And I knew I didn’t really have different personalities deep down; but my sense of self was so fractured#that I wanted the different pieces to be different people so I could make the need to think about my issues go away#I simply wanted one “personality” to kill the others so I would imagine long bloody battles between my “selves” in my head#to exorcise my mind of impure thoughts (which never worked because they weren’t real people#and I couldn’t kill them because the people I created symbolized concepts and desires on which my brain perseverated every waking moment)#I was trying to kill off parts of myself to attain everlasting life on a paradise earth; so I could build a real Data and android children#in Paradise#so if I died in Armageddon from bad behavior (watching Markiplier and having fun times in the shower) I’d be killing them too#And the only other kid I saw who claimed to want a disorder (“wanted” to have OCD) wanted it because they wanted to be like a character#and they were later diagnosed with — you guessed it — autism!#Also both of us had an astonishing amount of free time on the internet and were raised essentially as only children in a cult#So I think a lot of it is isolation and just not knowing who you are because you never see yourself react to anything in real life#You don’t know what you would do in situations and therefore have no sense of self from total lack of life experience#And I actually had OCD for awhile as well… I kicked it for the most part. But the whole rumination battle thing was certainly a sign
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