#especially the fake scenarios (but most fictional characters)

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Literally me…

visaVancute

[astrow1zar6]

Astro observations- 003

People with Mars in the 8th house tend to have stalkers. Whether it be exes or people who at school. Ppl become obsessed with them easily (good or bad)

Capricorn risings usually came from a household with an absent father & a very immature/narcissistic mother (Aries in 4th house) a lot of them had to parent themselves & their mother which caused this strong independence they have ☹️

I believe Eore from Winnie the Pooh had Saturn in his 5th house. I read somewhere this is the ultimate party pooper placement lol. They have a very serious tone to fun and it can feel very awkward to them to let loose. These are usually the people that try to leave parties/ social gatherings early. Can have a very monotone speech as well.

The most likable/easygoing person I’ve ever met’s big three was an Aquarius rising, Sagittarius sun, and a Libra moon.

12 house placements ( especially Venus) prefer relationships in their head then in the physical. They are hopeless romantics & long for a partner but I see a lot that will daydream about their crush but never make a move. The fake scenarios they make in their head with their crush are usually too good for most people to live up to & deep down they know this😂 the types to have fictional character crushes

Pisces placements are very big into cartoons/anime.

Many Virgo risings were born in very strict or religious households. Parents could’ve limited certain clothing or taught them sex was bad & not to have it before marriage. Parents had a big focus on making them “pure”. This is why they grow up with such humbleness and modesty. Were usually taught showing off was bad (Leo in 12th) even tho they deeply want to:(

Aquarius/ Pisces placements are the most likely to experiment with drugs

Uranus in the 12th people are actually big weirdos but due to trauma hide their quirkiness under a very conventional mask to fit in.

Sun in Capricorns aren’t into money as everyone claims. I find a lot that never go to college and work regular jobs. Very hardworking tho. I notice they care more about nice materials & designer instead of having high paying jobs & moving up the social latter like the (rising or moon).

Imo cap moons/risings are the breadwinners not so much the sun.

I notice people with grand trines have so much talent but most do nothing with them🙃 (me included)

People with Jupiter in the 12th house are sooo lucky. They put themselves in a lot of dangerous situations that they get out of safely everytime🙏🏽 think the cricket from Mulan 😂

People born with Mercury Rx I hear think in pictures and not words, very visual learners. Takes them longer to grasp language and logic early on which is why school & social situations can be difficult for them.

[queenvhagar]

"Average Team Green fan is bastardphobic" "Team Green thinks irl bastards are worse than other people" "Team Green fans are bad people because they actually don't like bastards"

Not sure if y'all know this but... fiction is not real life, and recognizing or discussing the actual dynamics of a cruel and unjust fictional world as it is written by the author does not equal an endorsement, promotion, or adoption of those elements or beliefs as they exist in that fictional world or in real life.

In real life, I and likely most if not all Team Green supporters could care less about the institution of marriage as one of making legitimately born babies. Personally I don't care if your parents were married to each other. Many people don't get married and still have families together. Children are children, people are people. Luckily in the modern world, in many places, having children out of wedlock is not really even that much of a taboo anymore. People can do what they want as long as they're happy. If I get married and/or have kids ever, that's my own business. I have no specific duties expected of me by my family or the world and the messages coming from society that I as a woman need to be married and make babies before I get too old? I can just ignore that. Nothing happens if I do.

In the fictional world of ASOIAF though, this is very clearly and unequivocally not the case at all. Westeros is obsessed with blood and bloodlines. Blood brings power. Blood continues power. The blood and the name together bring power. Great houses intermarry to bring themselves more power and alliances, under the agreement that the next generation will share the blood of their parents and families and that blood will preserve their power and status as it has for generations. This is essential to feudalism and the way that power and inheritance works (in Westeros and in the real-life history upon which it was based).

This is why it's such a taboo to have or be a bastard in Westeros, and why it's illegal to try to place a bastard in the line of succession. Marriage alliances are built on the principle that the trueborn children made from those matches will come from those particular parents and pass down that particular family's blood. If someone without that blood tried to claim that name and power, people would view that as the family losing the power they've held for generations. They would see it as an injustice. Wars would be willing to be fought over it. It's an indisputable fact that in this world trying to place a bastard in the line of succession will lead to bloodshed. This is especially the case for the Iron Throne. If you don't agree, read the source material and rethink how this world views women, bastards, bloodlines, and the right to the throne.

I'm not sure when people started thinking that the discussion of in-universe conflicts and issues as they exist in fictional worlds actually reflects on an individual's real life personal values or feelings. People knowledgeable of the world of ASOIAF criticize the character of Rhaenyra for birthing three obvious bastards (while she is already on rocky political ground as the first woman named heir) and then attempting to unsuccessfully gaslight everyone into thinking they are legitimate heirs despite the opposite being so clearly true. This criticism stems from knowledge and awareness of the world, beliefs, and laws of Westeros (that Rhaenyra herself also knew but believed herself to be the exception to). Yet when people point out how dangerous or stupid it was of her character to do this, knowing everything that is known about the world of ASOIAF and this specific conflict, suddenly stans feel the need to defend the vision of her that exists in their heads (one incorrectly furthered by the show's adaptation of the character as a modern feminist girlboss who can do no wrong) and make up fake scenarios or claims about the world of ASOIAF or about the critics to support their incorrect takes.

Saying Team Green fans, those who are not a fan of Team Black, or those who criticize the show's adaptation are bastardphobic in real life is similar to those Team Black stans who claim that Aegon's actor is a morally corrupt rape apologist because he plays a character who got written to be a rapist (likely after he was cast, by the way) or people who say authors shouldn't write a scene about murder or murderers because it endorses or promotes such behavior. Y'all really out here rewriting the Hays Code and essentially campaigning for censorship of media because you can't distinguish between real life and fiction. It's crazy that media literacy is at such an appalling state, though unfortunately it's clear that certain forms of internet fandom have really exacerbated issues that have already existed. Now, any character can be shoehorned into specific categories or types or memes that fit their understanding of media and those who disagree or desire actual thought, complexity, and analysis to go into stories or characters apparently shouldn't have a voice or platform to express their point of view, or if they do, it means something about them as a real-life human beyond this person is interested in discussing the story.

I've previously expressed that despite the fact that I love this story as a truly a morally gray conflict with gray characters that tells a rich sociopolitical story of a family tearing itself apart for power, and despite the fact that there are no winners, heroes, or correct sides to this conflict, I would call myself a Team Green supporter. And largely this is due to the lack of media literacy and understanding of the source material that the writers and general audience (see: uncritical Team Black fans) seem to have and the absolutely insufferable ways that they seem to constantly want to demonstrate to everyone that actually they're right and correct in their surface-level takes.

[fun-k-board]

Got a cool idea for you my friend.

The insomniac spider-men, both Peter and miles. And how they’d go when y/n offers to do a horror movie night with the likes of classics like Halloween or modern stuff like talk to me

The Insomniac Spider-Men with a horror movie night

Note(s) : I did Headcanons for how the Spider-Men are with horror movies and then a scenario at the end where the reader does the horror movie night.

I don't know anything about Talk To Me so I chose M3GAN instead, and I haven't seen Halloween in years so I'm sorry if I got something wrong.

Peter Parker / Spider-Man

I don't think Peter would really watch movies or shows all that often, he probably hasn't even finished any piece of media since before the spider bite. Even then, he was probably that kid who watched those really bad ones to make fun of with Harry and MJ.

I imagine his tolerance is most likely high, because of his real life experiences, he can handle fake blood, he can handle the fake injuries, most of them can't compare to what he's gone through.

But what he really can't handle? Psychological thrillers, and really good kid actors.

That scene in the shining where the two twins are standing there? He had to hold MJ's hand, Harry made fun of him for an entire month.

He tends to humanise fictional characters, especially the victims in horror movies. Maybe for some slashers he can understand their motives, but most of them hurt people who can't defend themselves and it makes him a little sick.

To see movies where this is used so effectively is honestly a little uncomfortable, he appreciates the mastery of how it's crafted and how realistic the pain is, but he can never watch it all the way through.

Peter's always been terrified of Carrie because he was also bullied, she, in a way, reflected on him. Of course, she also experienced abuse from her mother, unlike Peter, but the scene of everybody screaming in that hall will probably haunt him forever.

In a way, it keeps him grounded, it makes him remember Uncle Ben's words, it makes him remember to use his powers for good, and not for evil.

Miles Morales / Spider-Man

Miles and Ganke most likely sit down and watch some shows or movies every once and a while, he's never been a huge horror fan, and he's never watched any that really stuck with him.

He's mostly impressed with the art direction most of the time, the way they shot that scene in Carrie where it goes all around the prom in one, long, continuous shot?

It's beautiful, it gets him so engrossed he forgets it's supposed to be a scary movie.

Miles can't handle any that tackle and treat the loss of a parent as a main plot point, he could maybe handle it as a side plot, but it reminds him so much of how his dad's death affected him, his hands clam up, he feels sweaty, he just can't handle it.

It never really makes him connect with the story, it just makes me remember it as the 'oh God don't watch that' movie

The ones that get him truly terrified are honestly any that involve children and the elderly as the villains, that's not to say he'll be completely fine if he watches an adult brutally murder people.

Both

Peter and Miles haven't had a day off in months, they've been so focused on saving the city, helping their friends and family, they just don't have time for themselves.

Until today.

You had finally convinced the two, after hours of subtle and not so subtle convincing, they relented, under the promise that if any serious crimes were reported, they would get Ganke to check if the police have it handled or not, if they don't? They're abandoning the movie night.

Which you agreed with, because one night having fun is better than no time to yourself at all.

Peter and Miles sit down on the couch, while you make the popcorn and drinks, carrying the bowls of food and bottles of coke to the table, the microwave hums, drowned out by the two men chatting.

"Can you believe that Electro got out again." Miles sounds exasperated, and he looks it too, he and Electro had fought for what felt like hours, in reality it was only a few minutes, shocking each other until they couldn't fight any more.

"You get used to it, he'll probably stay a month in prison at most." Peter shrugs, leaning back on the couch and wincing slightly, an aching pain in his back started up again, but he was honestly too tired to ask for someone to crack it.

"This job is crazy." Miles laughs, shaking his head with an amused smile. "I can't believe it, each day, fighting bad guys, swinging for hours and hours, it's just... I love it." You cut the conversation short by bringing in the last bowl of popcorn.

"Whooo! Movie time!" You happily say, placing the bowl on the table with the other snacks and drinks, making sure it's perfectly placed before sitting on the couch. You grab the remote next to you and smile at Miles and Peter.

"What should we watch?" Before either can respond, you suddenly gasp, your eyes snapping back to the TV. "Oh! Actually, there's this new horror movie called M3GAN, I bought it a few weeks back and forgot to watch it." You ramble, turning the television on and searching for the movie.

"I guess we go with that one then." Peter mumbles, raising an eyebrow in amusement, you all haven't hung out in a while, even then, you do wish that Harry and MJ could've made it. So, it's clear you're just excited to spend time with them for once.

"It's about this robot that this lady makes after her niece loses her parents in a car accident." You cheerfully say, pressing play on the movie and taking a swig of coke. "After this, we're so watching Halloween."

The movie was something different to the two, when they think horror, both Peter and Miles would typically think 'man with knife stabs people', so it was a refreshing change.

Both men went through a flurry of emotions, the movie was sad, then funny, than horrifying, then funny, then scary, and then funny, it was a constant switch.

The fact that the girl lost her parents and she's clinging to the first thing that shows her respect, the lady stepped up at the end and proved she's a capable mother figure, it broke their hearts, but the jokes made them forget that temporarily.

They laughed, they went quiet in shock, and most of all? Peter cried, he couldn't help it, he isn't ashamed about it either, the girl losing her parents at such a young age reminds him of himself. Miles feels a similar way, he cried like a baby, he sobbed so much at that scene where the girl and the robot have that test and she breaks down.

Now it's time for the next movie.

"Halloween! You can't go wrong with the classics." You click on the movie. "Well, that's a lie, actually, plenty of classics suck." You mutter under your breath, pressing pause and turning to the two Spider-Men.

"Okay, first, bathroom breaks and refill time, you two ate all the popcorn so I'm making double." You get up from the couch and walk to the kitchen, both Peter and Miles go to the bathroom in that time, refilling their drinks with the bottle of coke on the floor, you return a few moments later with the multiple bowls of popcorn.

You all sit down, grab your bowls and drinks, and press play.

Overall, both men did enjoy the experience, they liked the costume of Micheal Myers, the mask and coveralls are iconic, they also both enjoyed the acting, if a bit subpar at times.

The plot was something they found to be interesting, the characters as well, they thought the therapist was a strange and weird character, who seemed a bit more unstable than Micheal.

Laurie Strode is a really inspiring character to the two, a survivor, someone who managed to take down one of the biggest threats her towns ever faced.

Just as the movie ends, you turn to the two men to see if they have any movie recommendations, but to your surprise, they've both fallen asleep.

Peter's mouth hangs open, his body pressed flat against the couch, his arms crossed and occasional light snores escapes his mouth. Miles is leaning his head on his arms, his body bent in an awkward position so he's sitting and leaning on the armrest.

For a few moments, you debate on whether or not you should wake them up, but decide against it. They need the rest. You gently move them into slightly more comfortable positions, placing blankets over the two, you stand up and reach for your phone.

You text MJ and Rio Morales, letting them know that the two would be staying at yours for the night.

[merr-murr]

CW : L0l1, CSA, CSAM, Harassment

Apparently there's a hate brigade running after me because some people cannot separate fiction from fantasy. I've had to say it on my Twitter and despite my lack of adult content on this account, people have made it their prerogative to harass me on multiple platforms.

if you genuinely think that drawings of fictional characters is equal to the suffering of real children put in abusive situations, get the FUCK off of my blog. I dealt with CSA my entire childhood and all of my teens years, including being groomed. I tried not to let this whole thing get to me, but people calling me a child predator because I made a fucking DRAWING that they found icky is one of the most insane things they could have possibly done. ESPECIALLY to someone who was a victim and would never wish that pain on anyone else.

My ASSAULT is not equal to demon children in a cartoon. Real people are not equal to fictional characters. You can say it's gross, you can say you don't like, hell, you can even be a fascist and say we should censor art you don't agree with! But don't ever compare me to an abuser because I drew naughty art of cartoon characters without sentience.

I will not apologize for having tastes that don't align with some online fascists who save art that THEY think is CSAM to their own hard drives to "call people out." You're a freak if you are saving material that you think is genuinely CSAM. You're a freak if you are encouraging people to go interact with someone who you think is a predator. You're a freak if you think human children are as worthless as cartoon drawings. You're a freak if you equate the real abuse and suffering of real people in any capacity to a factitious scenario created for kicks.

If you actually give a fuck about protecting children, stop wasting your time on a random artist (a CSAA victim) who drew a singular piece of l0l1 art and maybe volunteer your services to charities that help REAL CHILDREN.

Get over yourself and go touch some damn grass.

TLDR; If you think real children being abused is even remotely equal (legally OR morally) to cartoon drawings of fake demon characters, I do not want you following me or interacting with me as a CSA survivor.

[incomingalbatross]

"That shouldn't work. And yet when Doyle writes it, with one of the most popular heroes in all fiction, it does."

No seriously. Moriarty shows up in this ONE story where he basically just slips away from the authorities, fakes a message to get Watson away from Holmes, and fights Holmes to the death.

All of the traits making him a nemesis to Holmes is from one monologue where Holmes tells us he was involved in a great mental chess match of move and riposte that finally ended with Holmes destroying this mighty criminal empire, a battle of geniuses like nothing ever seen. It's like if Death Note was just Near and/or L telling someone about Light Yagami's brilliance, about their cat and mouse game, and that it would soon end, just before he and Light both manage to kill each other.

Yet it WORKS? Maybe it's that this story was standalone so we knew we couldn't see the whole thing, maybe it was Holmes taking it seriously enough to want him and Watson to be out of the way, maybe it was the skill of the writing of Holmes's monologue, maybe it's just that this was what (briefly) killed Holmes? Or possibly a combination of all of the above.

Nevertheless, this is one of the only times where a character manages to simply TELL us "This guy's my archnemesis, my true equal against whom I've been engaged in a legendary battle of wills." And everyone bought it. Now whenever there's an adaptation, if Holmes gets a nemesis it's Moriarty.

Not bad Doyle. Not bad at all.

EXACTLY. Exactly. That's the thing!

By all the standard rules of serial storytelling, it seems to me it shouldn't work. Especially when we know, and everyone at the time (I think) knew, that the primary writing goal here was Holmes's death. It should be like when a character gets killed off in a TV show and you're like "...yeah, we know they would've survived that it you'd wanted them to survive." It should be like when the Strongest Guy Ever in an anime gets ripped to pieces by the shiny new villain, and you just sort of roll your eyes because you know strength keeps growing as the plot demands. It seems like it should be both of those combined! But we all respect Moriarty. We believe in Moriarty's abilities.

I think part of it probably is how much we respect Holmes's intellect and judgment—him telling us to take this guy seriously, as long as Holmes himself remains in-character and well-written, is the most convincing evidence we could have that Moriarty is Bad News. Part of it is that Doyle never wrote a comparable scenario for Holmes, as far as I can remember, before or even after this; the fact that we've never seen anyone on Holmes's level like this, or a threat to him in a sense other than "currently holding a gun," means that Moriarty continues to stand out as a genuinely greater threat to Holmes. This is an escalation in the stakes of previous canon in several ways, and the great thing is that future canon doesn't escalate—Doyle didn't write any more comparable evils after this! This helps sell the original presentation of Moriarty as Uniquely Terrible.

But yeah, all that's just a part of it, I think. It's ultimately just...really, really successful, and I really admire it.

[laufire]

trope selection tag game

I was tagged by @comebackali (ty!)

enemies to lovers or friends to lovers - I'm more of a lovers to enemies gal, but I given that this would be the trope to follow for my current otp (and I have quite a few other important ones there), I went with ETL, despite being... very picky about it, tbqh lol.

coffee shop au or flower shop au - I'm not particularly into either, but I picked flower shop just based on the fact that I know Dinah owns one in a Green Arrow run I have yet (but plan) to read lmfao.

hurt/comfort or there was only one bed - I do enjoy a good h/c story, and I don't particularly feel the appeal of the only-one-bed scenario lol.

found family or partners in crime - DEFINITELY PARTNERS IN CRIME. PARTNERS IN CRIME IS THE BEST FUCKING THING A SHIP CAN BE. I LOVE IT SM.

canon compliant or canon divergent - I'm into both, but writing-wise I often go for the "hey, would it be fucked up if this happened instead", so xD

domesticity or pwp- "porn porn porn!!!" <- keeping that answer from prev xD

fluff or angst with a happy ending - "fluff is boring, give me angst any day" <- also keeping that one! I also dig angst without a happy ending lol, but tbf finding good examples in fic can be an uphill battle.

1st person pov or 3rd person pov - I love 1st person in original fiction but I must admit I have yet to find an example where I don't find it jarring in fic. Maybe because I read about characters I have thought a lot about and I already have an idea of what their voices "should" sound like...? IDK. Food for thought. Specially as I have a WIP in the works that includes diary entries lol.

soulmates or forbidden love - I only tolerate soulmates if it's horror, hate the trope as a "romantic" one lol.

roommates or fake dating - fake dating can be fun. Especially if it's for undercover shenanigans.

slow burn or meet-cute - I'm a fan of the Meet Ugly (and really, isn't that a meet-cute in a way xD) and tend to feel underwhelmed with most slow burns.

love triangle or polyamorous relationship - I definitely enjoy the latter, especially if there's DRAMA in it (also been really feeling jaytimia lately) BUT rn I feel like defending love triangles. There should be more and they should be messy. And weirder, instead of relying on the same ol' (wildly heteronormative) structures.

royalty au or magic au - honestly, both are so varied depending on context that I can't choose. Why not both. Fairy tale AU style. I do love a good fairy tale AU.

high school/college au or neighbours au - sometimes I write characters who go to school or who are neighbours by that's different from a School AU TM or a Neighbours AU TM... those tend to be very mundane and that's not my thing lol.

mutual pining or idiots to lovers - most mutual pining scenarios make me think the characters are idiots* and/or not as intensely in love as I'm supposed to believe them to be and. I don't care for that lol. *I can be more forgiving about idiocy depending on character age but if it's grown adults I get more and more frustrated about it lmao.

tagging: @hellispeacefullandempty @nomattertheoceans @nightingalesighs @blairwaldcrf @jaynotwayne

@iamnotawomanimagod @lucerants @nicoleanell @the-greendalehumanbeings @wowthatsextra and whoever feels up for it!

[mommalosthermind]

*claps hands* okay my darling ducks! I have a goddamn bone to pick so gather ‘round for circle time!

I am seeing all sorts of weird takes spike in fandom spaces lately but THIS:

Disclaimer I DO NOT SHIP THIS(no shame to those who do if it’s legal you do you) This in NO way is it supposed to be a ship work please don’t take it as that I will cry

in the description of a fic has officially tipped the cup for me.

If you cannot write something-unhealthy or otherwise- without feeling the need to write a disclaimer, do not write that scenario. Write something that makes you less uncomfortable.

stories are fake. The characters are fake. There is no legality nor any morality attached to fiction. The legal status in real life means Jack Shit while playing paper dolls.

Thought crimes are not real crimes. Things like killing off (popular character here) is not murder, they’re not dead, they were never alive. Characters cannot have their agency infringed upon, because they are not people with thoughts or emotions, or a will. Or a body. They are letters I put on a page. I am not performing a crime when I write one. I am typing on a keyboard.

Allow me to repeat: Laws and moral values do not apply to fiction.

but most importantly: my child in fandom you wrote the fucking fic. Own it. If fear of stupid people on the internet makes you add purity disclaimers— I legitimately don’t even know how people live like this.

fic is a hobby. It is a personal playground. Write for your enjoyment of your story.

All cops are bad, especially the one in your fucking head.

Put the pig out to pasture and focus on enjoying your life instead of crushing yourself into the box of what other people think is acceptable today.

[fictionkinfessions]

There are tearstains on my pillowcase, now. From all the times I try to imagine what it might be like, to be with you, to love you, to be held in your arms. It always starts off with a few tears based on whatever scenario I was imagining--because that's all I can do to keep sane, imagine a life I can't have in this reality--but sometimes it gets more, and I'm actually sobbing, not just because of what I was daydreaming about but because I know that I won't be able to feel your arms around me like I keep imagining, won't be able to gently kiss you on the forehead, won't be able to snuggle up together on the couch--

--it hurts. it hurts so fucking much sometimes I don't know how I stand it. why are most people able to find the ones they love in this reality, but I'm cursed with knowing that here, everyone thinks both of us aren't real. Even in the 'fake' version of us, our lives, that is peddled in this reality as fiction and make-believe, show us as nothing more than cold, distant, barely friends. But I know we are so much more than that. I know that I love you, as insane as that might sound. 'Cringe,' that's what people call it when 'real' people claim to love 'fictional' characters, especially 'animated' ones, but I can't help it.

And I don't think it's something to be ashamed of, what I feel for you, even when it's agony.

~Ichigo Kurosaki #🍓🔪

x

[ficto-confessions]

I find it so weird and exhausting how people act like being ficto is a choice. Like if you watch reaction videos on people who talk about being in love with fictional characters, it's barely ever a positive reaction. It's all "go outside", "get fresh air", "go get a real partner". And I've heard similar sentiments from the aroace spaces too. I get it, ficto identities are currently very small and not many people know about them. But I feel like a lot of people say things like "the aromantic/asexual spectrum is completely valid! Every aroace identity is valid and should be respected!" then when a ficto person comes in all of a sudden it's 'everyone's valid and acceptable except you'. They might not use the same words, but they're just as exclusionist at times.

It's just... they don't treat ficto identities like LGBTQ labels, like it's an attraction that people can't control and are born with like ever other identity. I didn't choose to not find real people attractive, I didn't choose for my fictional crushes to not be lighthearted little jokes. I didn't choose to spend months at a time stressing and second-guessing myself because I didn't want to hear those exact words of unacceptance. I tried to like real people, I honestly did! I put a lot of thought and focus into planning for my future real partner. But at the end of the day the label caught up with me, and I ended up finally accepting that part of myself. So to go through so much struggle and then hear "go get a real partner"... it really really stings. I can't drop my fiction partners, I love them very deeply and they bring me so so much comfort and joy and make me feel so loved. And I couldn't like real people even when I tried.

I feel like I have so much more I want to say but that's basically it. Ficto stuff is usually all put under the "you can't get an irl partner so you're gonna be a basement creep who dates pictures of fake characters" stigma. And as someone who struggled with my ficto-ness a lot, it really hurts to see people acting like I can just choose to get a "real partner" anytime and acting like I'm just someone who got rejected too many times (never have, I've never even asked anyone out, I've never liked people like that). It's.. well.. a part of my identity. It's who I am. Not something I can just suddenly drop and then magically find an irl partner to be with. It's not a choice, a fad, a recuperation from rejection, or a "basement dweller" thing. It's an identity on the aro/ace spectrums that needs to be respected as much as the more well-known labels are

Yeah.

I think they're rather jealous,cuz whats nice of having an irl partner that u have to get by basically manipulating them to like u, relationships aren't forever plus they're capable of horrible things or that nowadays ppl don't even have standards in dating & just take anyone or think that being w someone w common sense is the most important trait?.. Like no shit,u wouldn't want to be w someone that hurts you & they way ppl describe dating makes me cringe since what they often describe is basically just friendship w extra steps.

And average relationship lasts for a few years, so whats the point of doing the same scenario w someone when u know it's gonna end anyways? Also irls are disgusting when it comes to anatomy & overly boring, so.

You can also count victim blaming. Cuz what if you went through abuse? According to them you're supposed to go through partners & just decide to pretend like it never happen & never give up on this vile species despite them not deserving any of it. And it goes w other types of relationships as well.

They want fictos to suffer cuz they want them to experience the unknown of not knowing how the relationship's gonna go and end. They call this shut exciting, but its more like a torture,why would u make a dumbass of urself just to get someone to like you? And especially if you socially struggle,its hard to get someone to urself and by that logic, you'd need to have zero standards if u wanted to get at least w someone.

W being ficto,you can have high standards & have thousands of different kinds of f/os. Like do u like anime characters? There are thousands of animes. Do you like cartoon characters? There are hundreds of cartoons. Or just any nonhuman characters, like in fantasy games,movies,series etc. Or just create ocs that fit your standards. You also know how they act so you know what you might be dealing w. And its not the same w irls.You get basically "same" looking millions of copies of several races or nationalities & characteristics with face structures. Are they pleasing to look at? No. Do you know what they're capable of? Also no.

Like why the hell would I change my f/os, that not only are amazing looking facewise, but they're also nice & chill to be around, or just having pleasing voices, that would never do the same damage irl ppl did/ would do to me, to a mf that might hurt me, wouldn't fit my standards & I would have zero choices in choosing? It's illogical. But I also personally never found ppl hot or something.

It's just the victim blaming and overwhelming jealousy & the desire to see others to have the same struggles in finding relationships since how dare u not to live the same way they do.

[distinguisheddwarffriend]

Yo but just IMAGINE the Tolkien characters reacting to FanFiction!

No, really, stay with me for a mo'

It's always a funny scenario, but not only is this a world without tech & internet = no publicity/ media, the stories they tell are also like 99% based solely on real events, the whole "making something up" just... doesn't happen?

So just imagine, those characters that are so unfamiliar with ALL of those concepts, reading our lil weird kinky delulu shit & at first thinking this is just like fake news & people actually believe this about them????

And then, once they understood (it took some time, trust me), there is an absolute SPECTACLE of various reaction between "bro you're literally shipping me with a STAR" and "what is Durincest AM I FUCKING MY BROTHER OR UNCLE OR BOTH WHAT THE -?"

And while the Elves superficial totally pretend to be all aloof & "this is beneath us & not worth our time" they ABSOLUTELY are the most invested shippers & start doing the best fan art in secret, but remain mainly with popular ships like Bagginshield/ FinrodxMaeglor (that's the one-handed due he saves right? The names in Silm are just-).

The Dwarves mainly don't take it seriously, but get weirdly competitive about it: "I have 5 more ships about me than you do, one is even with Sauron/ an Elf/ my literal brother, I'm that popular, make way you peasant!"

Humans are mainly like "okay, y'all do you, I'll keep lookin for a REAL wife because biological clock & stuff" (but secretly the girls LOVE the Elf stuff, ESPECIALLY if it's gay cus that's a not so widely spread concept for them, and the guys read it first just"to see what all the fuss is about ", but then get fingernail-chewingly invested in the most twisted romances, and jabe at least one (1) gay crisis).

Now the Dunedain, whenever they meet, will have HOUR LONG deep & philosophical discussions about rare ships & why they make sense/ should happen. (My People!)

The Hobbits on one side completely adopt all kinds of curtain fics, reading them to each other & cooing about all the fluff, but behind closed doors they own the Dead Dove Tag like none other.

Following: Angry Rant about Fandom etiquette:

While I'm at it:

LET PEOPLE ENJOY THEIR SHIPS & HEADCANONS IN PEACE!!!!

JUST BECAUSE YOU DONT SHIP/ HC SOMETHING (WHICH IS TOTALLY FINE!!!) DOESNT MEAN YOU GET TO TELL OTHERS THEY SUCK/ ARE SICK FOR THEIR PREFERENCES!!!!

I for example am absolutely WEAK for Durincest.

In FICTION.

(I DO have a rather controversial "laissez-faire"-attitude about incest between siblings (as long as no kids happen), but that's another can of worms.)

Because what we enjoy in fiction does NOT translate to real life.

On the other hand I HATE A/B/O or Soul-Mates, anything where the choice of whom you love/ are attracted to is taken from you.

YOU KNOW WHAT I DO ABOUT THAT?

That's right, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!

I simply don't read it!!!!!

Okay, that's it, proceed, Love, Bye! 😘👍🏻

It's only polite to ask first.

(In the third panel, Elrond is thinking "Who else does this sort of thing? Where in his tiny body does he keep all that Audacity? This kind of thing is why I love this guy").

[ecardon1]

Is the Ukraine War Becoming the Laboratory for the Next Development in Warfare-Artificial Intelligence (AI)

The next form of warfare is being created in Ukraine. It is not a laboratory on the margins, but a center-stage, relentless and unprecedented effort to fine-tune, adapt and improve AI-enabled or AI-enhanced systems for immediate deployment. That effort is paving the way for AI warfare in the future. Think about the opening of Terminator 2-Judgment Day with armies of robotic soldiers fighting other robots and humans using some form of weapons of mass destruction being fired from the ground and the sky. Hollywood science fiction? Maybe not

Some have called it ‘hyper warfare” or “algorithmic warfare,” in which autonomous systems and weapons independently start selecting their course of action based on the situation in which they find themselves; others have coined the term “software defined warfare” as part of a vision in which software will be the crucial part of the defense architecture needed for next-generation warfighting systems.

What all these concepts have in common is the vision of a truly networked battlefield in which data moves at the speed of light to connect not only sensors to shooters, but also the totality of deployed forces and platforms. It is a future scenario that is envisioned partly because of fast-paced technological developments, but also because of fears related to geopolitical competition and what near-peer competitors might be able to deploy in the near future.

In general, AI is heavily used in systems that integrate target and object recognition with satellite imagery. In fact, AI’s most widespread use in the Ukraine war is in geospatial intelligence. AI is used to analyze satellite images, but also to geolocate and analyze open-source data such as social media photos in geopolitically sensitive locations. Neural networks are used, for example, to combine ground-level photos, drone video footage and satellite imagery to enhance intelligence in unique ways to produce strategic and tactical intelligence advantages.

In addition, AI itself has undergone dramatic technical improvements, with the growing accuracy of machine learning models and systems, as well as the increased capability of AI systems to integrate and cross-reference data from various sources.

The Russia-Ukraine war can also be considered the first conflict where AI-enhanced facial recognition software has been used on a substantial scale. In March 2022, Ukraine’s defense ministry started using facial recognition software produced by the U.S. company Clearview AI. This allows Ukraine to identify dead soldiers and to uncover Russian assailants and combat misinformation.

AI is playing an important role in electronic warfare and encryption. For example, the U.S. company Primer has deployed its AI tools to analyze unencrypted Russian radio communications.  

The flip side to this is the more visible use of AI surrounding the conflict: the spread of misinformation and the use of deep fakes as part of information warfare. AI has, for example, been used to create face images for fake social media accounts used in propaganda campaigns. While the spread of disinformation is not new, AI offers unprecedented opportunities for scaling and targeting such campaigns, especially in combination with the broad range of social media platforms.

The longevity of the conflict allows companies to fine-tune, adapt and improve their AI systems on the go. This is where AI-enhanced weapons and systems are markedly different from conventional ones: the longer they are deployed, the more data can be collected to improve them directly. As such, this conflict is a major stepping stone toward the networked battlefield and the AI wars of the future.

While the character of the war may not yet be determined by AI, the Russia-Ukraine war is akin to a laboratory setting in which many companies and governments are able to constantly train and test AI systems for a wide range of capabilities, functionalities and applications. This is the tragic paradox. Each day that the conflict continues, and human beings are losing their lives in horrible ways, AI systems are being trained with real data from a real battleground — not to stop the suffering and end the war, but to become more effective in fighting the next one: the AI war.

Ed Cardon

EPC Search International LLC

470-345-0846

ed@epcsearchinternational.com

[twenty-eight-stabwounds]

Genshiken (II)

In my opinion, I really don't understand this anime, or the messages it's trying to get across. These episodes assigned focus on one of the characters creating fake scenarios where her male friends are in a gay fanfiction. This already has weird implications of Ogiue as a character, in that she is almost crossing a morality line by putting real people into fictional scenarios for her own enjoyment. She is self-aware enough to realize that talking about these fictional scenarios out loud is typically looked down upon, but it doesn't necessarily stop her from continuing to imagine them. The introduction of the American characters made watching everything a lot more uncomfortable on top of everything presented already. While they weren't necessarily fetishizing the Japanese media and culture they were exposed to, the club still isn't completely accepting of the American fans because they are wary of becoming fetishized objects to Westerners. They eventually come to realize that they share a lot of common interests, but the club still doesn't fully accept them. Overall, this group of episodes was just weird to watch, especially with Ugoie, but I will say that the anime does do a good job on speaking about Otaku culture and different kinds of Otakus in the world. Otaku culture creates a space for people with similar interests in certain media to discuss their hobbies and interests in whatever way is most easily expressable. The episodes do a good job of presenting the extremes of Otaku culture as well as the benefits of people interested in these cultures being able to find a safe place to share their interests.

[antisocialxconstruct]

OKAY so basically ever since I decided to take Ghost City out of the SR setting and make it its own thing, I've been really stumped on what to do about this tattoo...

Because originally in-fiction, "грешник" was sort of an inside joke with himself because he thought it was funny that the colloquial term for someone with a legal ID in UCAS was "SINner," especially with the added element that he, an illegal immigrant, was going to great lengths to get a fake SIN just so he could like. rent an apartment and buy cigarettes :/

I didn't want to get rid of the tattoo itself because I just like it as an element of his design, but I felt like this specific term felt too intrinsic to SR for me to be comfortable just keeping it in my setting, so... I've been wracking my brain for a new reason he could have "sinner" tattooed on his collar that still felt like it said something pointed about his sensibilities. And finally it hit me... what if he got that one really young? What if instead of a cheeky joke it was earnest, overly dramatic teen angst and he's just continued to own it ever since? I think that still feels like it adds a similar bit of flavor to his character--it's been like 15 years and not only has he not gotten it covered or removed, he still actively makes wardrobe decisions that show it off.

And then THAT finally made something click with me that explains why even when I'm like "I think Maksim would have more than just three tattoos 🤔" I can't figure out what else to give him... basically, the way I've written him is that his choice to get a tattoo is always spurred by wanting to cement a significant moment in his life, but specifically in a way that's kind of... reasserting himself, reclaiming or taking the power out of an idea that's hurt him in some way. So basically what we've got is:

"грешник" - his first tattoo, probably got it on like his 16th birthday or something against his parents' wishes and specifically to get a reaction out of them. His parents were a) not super religious but just observant enough to frustrate him, and b) emotionally hands-off to the point that he spent most of his teens acting out """for attention""". So he just wanted something that his little undercooked teenage brain thought would be really shocking and scandalous to them.

the snake - gotten after two different relationships had broken down back to back, one where he was accused of being cold and emotionally unavailable, and another where he was accused of being dishonest and sending mixed signals. He concluded he must just be impossible to love, and the tattoo marked his decision to give up on intimate relationships for good. (lmao)

the clover - gotten after The Incident, and mirrors the gunshot scar on his left shoulder... I think even Maksim isn't sure whether this one is meant to be earnest ("I'm lucky they were able and willing to incapacitate me instead of just killing me") or ironic ("how lucky our team was that they just happened to have someone so uniquely susceptible to mind control who ruined everything!"), but obviously he wasn't gonna walk away from something that paradigm-shattering without a new tattoo...

And now that's got the gears turning where I'm like well gosh..... what keeps coming up as something people call him intending it to be insulting or derogatory? 🤔 Didn't Ilya make a comment early on about him being an "attack dog" for the Russian state? Didn't Nav call him a "rabid dog" that should have been put down? Didn't people start calling him Ilya's dog after he decided to help them against NervAMP? (I've only published one of these scenarios here but trust me the answer is yes across the board gfdsg) So..... it sure seems like he might be due for another insult to reclaim and assimilate into his persona :3c

reminder to myself to ramble about Maksim tattoo lore when I get home

[potteresque-ire]

Commentary ~ Little Red Little Green Episode 18, “Fruits & Found Family”

Link to original post in Chinese, posted 2021/05/23. Link to official English translation.

(Disclaimer / Notes + Commentary under the cut!) (TW: possible eating disorder)

Disclaimer / Notes:

While the posts by Little Red Little Green (LRLG) are among my most favourite candies, I’d like to remind everyone that they are fake rumours, and should be read and enjoyed as such. ie, all CPN below!

The English translation linked above is the only one authorised by the Fake Rumour House; therefore, please treat all content below as a very casual, very *unofficial* convo between fellow turtle friends! ❤️💛💚

With Chinese being a highly region-specific language, my reactions to it is necessarily filtered through my background, which is, admittedly, somewhat removed from Gg’s, Dd’s and LRLG’s. However, it is not uncommon for even c-turtles (and several times, LRLG themselves) to be lost with what they read / heard due to regional differences ~ which reflects the reality of communicating in the Sinosphere. In fact, the regionality of the dialects used by different “characters” in LRLG’s dialogues is among the most critical elements that make these posts so authentic-sounding, and so difficult to replicate. A fun activity of following LRLG is to watch c-turtles patch their regional knowledge together, from local slangs to food choices, to make sense of what’s going on. 

Okay, with that all said *phew* ... onto the commentary! “p. X” refers to the panel number in the official English translation (there are 7 total in the Twitter post). 

p1. “Fairy”

Likely referring to the similarity between Gg’s current role for 玉骨遥 (The Longest Promise) and LWJ. Dd was praising Gg for being “fairy-like”; Chinese “fairies” (仙) have a certain style especially in visual media, similar to ... LWJ’s ~ otherworldly, white robes that billow in the wind, peaceful to the point of distant, scholarly, delicate. In between the lines, Gg likely said he was simply playing LWJ (hence, the ”act another me” in the translation), which Dd protested... and said Gg was simply playing himself. Whether that means DD IS NOT LWJ!!!!! 😡😡😡 or something else, we’ll know what we get to watch the show!

p1-p2. “Heat”

Yes about the Chang’e 嫦娥 reference!! Despite Houyi 后羿 shooting down 9/10 suns and saving the day, his wife is, indeed, more famous (and therefore the star, the more powerful one), because she’s frequently featured in Mid-Autumn festival art, along with her pet rabbit 玉兔 (”Jade Rabbit”),:

(Chang’e with her bunny, traditional Chinese painting. Source.)

Below is Gg’s rendition of Chang’e / Jade Bunny pair ~ Chang’e being the superman in the drawing while Jade Bunny is crouching on the planet!! 

Guess of the missing convo from Gg’s side: Gg had wanted to bring something to Hengdian (where the filming of The Longest Promise was taking place) to cool himself down, and Dd had said it wasn’t necessarily. Hence Dd’s “My bad my bad” and the promise to send that something to Gg.

The loveliest line in this segment for me—and for many c-turtles— is the one about white hair. Turning grey a common, but very old-fashioned way of expressing worry and poor Dd, who hasn’t even turned 24, is claiming he was turning white because he got so worried every time Gg complained about the heat (Aww). 

Turning grey with worry isn’t limited to romantic situations — it may happen to doting parents with wayward children, for example, or to ancient patriots over their crumbling kingdom. However, it’s also one of the more (very!) dramatic ways to communicate tragic love in Chinese fiction before Western influence allows “love”, as a term / word / character, to be used explicitly in writing romance. 

Here’s a little example, a little diversion that may be of interest. Those who are familiar with the Wuxia classic Return of the Condor Heroes 神雕俠侶 by Jin Yong 金庸, whether it’s the book or its numerous visual adaptations, may remember how the hero, Yang Guo 楊過, went white at his temples overnight after his Shifu and lover, Xiao Long Nv (小龍女), didn’t show up at the cliff at the end of his 16-year wait for her.  

Set photo from a TV adaption of Return of the Condor Heroes, 1995. Turtles may find the actress playing the perenially white-wearing, calm-to-the point-of-aloof Xiao Long Nv, Carmen Li 李若彤, familiar ~ she also played Lan Yi in The Untamed. 

The 16-year wait, the invitation to Carmen to play Lan Zhan’s ancestor (when the two shared similarities in aesthetics and personality), were two of the three references from Return of the Condor Heroes I picked up from The Untamed (the last one was more specific—WWX mentioned Yang Guo’s master 獨孤求敗). This tribute is unconfirmed, but MXTX did say before that Jin Yong’s works were her inspiration. I also read a (small) discussion on whether LWJ’s hair carried a few pieces of white in the final episode, or if the lighter strands in it were a trick of the sunlight. (Here’s a screenshot of the approximate place to look!!) 

While I lean towards the latter (the sunlight), turning white with worry, with love, is a tradition in Chinese storytelling. Here’s a little something I’ve noticed too, on this note ~ both in the actual interviews and in these fake rumours, Dd’s word choices, the way he conveys emotions are sometimes surprisingly traditional. It can be because of his background (which would require a study of how Luo Yang people and Koreans talk); it can be because the traditional way of talking allows for fewer words to be said, fewer things to have to be explicitly explained (example: LWJ), but the effect is that Dd has supplied the most romantic lines in LRLG’s posts because of that ~ romantic because it harks back to the rhythm, the themes of old poetry, of ancient stories that, as were true everywhere in the world, were about love. 

Okay, back to the rumour (and hoping Dd won’t look like Bad Wig Yang Guo in a few more summers!) ....

The line after the one about white hair ... the way I understand the original Chinese sentence is “Heat is The Reason”: ie, anything Dd wants Gg to do and Gg disagrees, Gg would use heat as The Reason (R) to not do it. This anything may be eating, for example, which also has a strong possibility as conventional Chinese wisdom says that heat causes people to lose appetite. Dd’s worry would therefore be: Gg refusing to eat because he claims it’s too hot to do so.

“Corny joke” ~ the Chinese for this is, literally, “cold 冷 joke 笑話”, which becomes a pun as the gzry (team members)’s joke was about the (cold) winter and black hair. So... Dd threw a corny joke to combat a corny joke :D .

p3. “Apple”

The first half I also had to rely on c-turtles to help me interpret what it meant! Regional dialects aside, LRLG has captured dls’s very quick wit, the way his ideas freely hop from one concept to the next and this hopping carries traditional + popular cultural references that I know only a fraction of, not being a local after all. 

I’ve read an additional interpretation of this segment: “big fruit” 大果兒 (as in dls: “Those are all big fruits, all big fruits”) is a Northern Chinese, traditional slang for women—dls might have connected that with the previous line in the convo about being Guowang, as explained in the translation, and “big and juicy” + “touch to feel” being suggestive phrases. Then, given the rare usage of the big fruit = women slang, dls expressed surprise that Dd understood what he meant, went on to say he expected Gg to know it (implying Gg could’ve taught Dd the meaning) ... 

Which led to the entertaining part of this segment. Dd was like “You guys (= Gg + dls) talked?” Dls appeared to have thought of the scenario customarily inviting this question (scenario: someone on the verge of catching their spouse cheating) and began playacting that scenario, started to stammer ... as if he had just been got caught trying to chat up someone’s spouse  ~  ”I-I-I....how to say it ...”. Dd caught on dls’s playacting and went along, continued with the “accusation”: “You’re stammering”. Dls then noted that Dd’s accusation was scary and Dd smiled, ending the playact ~ so, ah, readers, never mess with Dd’s spouse!! Dd gets scary!! 

(BTW: ”nijia na kouzi” 你���那口子 was explained in the translation for a reason ~ It’s a warm, friendly term for a dear friend’s spouse. 😊)

p4. Lychees

Lychees. Has everyone tried them? It’s important not to over-eat them though...

In which the “Feeding Gg” saga continues! This segment is one of those that are wonderful for fic writers who wish to capture Gg and Dd in words. Gg, like many brought up in traditional families, has trouble saying “no” outright, which is often considered rude. As such, he resorted to delay tactics, something he had also done with the fried noodles in The Makeup Room BTS. 

In the BTS, his delay tactics had been to argue that Dd hadn’t eaten his box of noodles and therefore, he couldn’t start (~2:35 mark)—as proper manners indeed dictated. In this dialogue, his delay tactics was to say he’d eat the lychees later, that the lychees would make him too full for the proper meal (rice). 

A cute thing about this convo is that rather than pouting and grumbling his only being LWJ’s replacement (as he had hilariously done in the BTS), Dd had, apparently over the last three years, become an expert on countering such delay tactics. He peeled the lychees, which not only removed a major obstacle for eating, but also set a timer as peeled lychees get dry quickly (and Gg, despite being a picky eater, didn’t seem to like to waste food). He said the fruit could make appetiser. He got the help of their team members, who assured Gg that two lychees would be all right.

Gg’s response to the assurance... takes a little time to explain. 

The original Chinese line for “Great, great, you’re so awesome” was 絕了絕了你們絕了。 “絕了”, a popular phrase used by Chinese netizens, was repeated three times.

���, literally, means the extreme, the absolute, the end. 絕了 means pretty much the same ~ a thing that is 絕了 is standing en pointe at the edge of the cliff that is The Absolute End of a spectrum. It is the Ultimate. It can't be surpassed. It’s unbeatable. 

絕了 is usually used in a positive sense, as in the English translation, with the positive being implied. If I say the LWJ photo above is 絕了, for example, I don’t need to specify that the extreme in 絕 stands on the good end. It’s understood given the audience of this post are mostly turtles (HELLO *waves*). We’re all heart-eyes here. We agree, without saying, that this photo is The Top, The Pinnacle; it can’t be better. 絕了 is higher praise than Excellent; it’s so good that there are no adjectives for it. Its own presence defines How Good It Is. 

But 絕了 doesn’t have to be positive. If my audience is Su She ... he’s likely to take the same “This LWJ photo is 絕了” to mean the Mariana Trench kind of Absolute—the bottom of the bottom, the Unbeatable, Adjective-Defying Worst. 

絕了 allows for that understanding too.

In this scenario, I interpret Gg’s 絕了 as taking the meaning of both extremes (which make it a fantastic phrase choice!): that Gg thought Dd and the team members were being both the Absolute Best (for thinking of Gg, caring for him) AND the Absolute Worst (for going against his wish to not eat!) Gg’s 絕了 also signals defeat; if Dd and his team members were The Absolute ... Whatever, then poor Gg had no choice but to yield to their wishes. I can already imagine his “I can’t believe I lose this way” Look (see: every rock-paper-scissors he lost, which was ... pretty much all of them), mixed with, perhaps, a healthy amount of bunny tooth warning (how dare Dd et al banded up against him)...

Those bunny teeth had to be taken care of, right? And so Dd went on to say lychees being good omen that ensure things would go smoothly for the eater... targeting Gg’s being a, as c-turtles call it, 小迷信 (literally, “Little Superstitious”, a young + adorable + superstitious person). Dd said that to help Gg justify the choice to eat, to make Gg feel better about his defeat. 

(Of note: I had actually never heard of lychees being associated with good luck before, and a quick search online also didn’t yield any result. This could be a relatively rare association Google failed to catch ... or something Dd made up on the fly to make Gg happy.) 

(Lychees have, however, been associated with romance. If Emperor’s Smile 天子笑 was The Love Drink in The Untamed, then what is Concubine’s Smile 妃子笑? Answer: it’s the RL name of a type of lychees, lychees being the fruit very much adored by Yang Yuhuan 楊玉環, the consort of the Emperor Xuanzong (685-762 BCE) of the Tang Dynasty and one of the four most beautiful woman in Chinese history. Since lychees had only been grown in southern China, the emperor had had the fruit couriered, in express mode involving many horses, to the palace up north to please his favourite wife. Lychees had become a symbol of love from that historical tale.)

Did Gg get Dd’s message then, the love and care packaged in those peeled, sweet fruit awaiting his bite? Yes, but not without a little more fight! “Eat eat eat, (I’ll eat) until you go bankrupt” is a literal translation of his final line. Tonally, I can see the following as being an alternative translation: 

“Fine fine fine. I’ll eat, it’s not like I can bankrupt you by eating anyway!”

If it sounded a little sulky, that’s because it did ... a little sulky AND fiery. As expected from our favourite Chongqing Big Pepper 😂😂😂 (Poor Gg).

Dd smiled at that, needless to say. He won!!! He got Gg to eat!! The world shall rejoice!! 

p5. “Showtime”

There’s a show coming up for Dd (the YH concert maybe?), and Gg offered suggestions. 

The sweet point of this segment is about half-way down the conversation, in the piece of paper 📄 Gg gave to Dd (after “This is for you.”). Dd took the paper, noted the many words on it, and started saying 我把我整個靈魂, translated as “I bring my entire soul”.

c-Turtles have, based on these words, hypothesised that Dd was about to read out a quote that Gg had written on the paper, with the list of items Gg thought Dd should take, before Gg stopped him with a call of his name (“WYB”). The quote was included on the translation (”I give you my entire soul...only, a little good, love you.”) I have also talked about the same quote, in more detail, here.

I’m equally stumped on the final line of this segment. (Sorry!!)

p6. “Found Family”

It’s a heartwarming segment. While LRLG had previously noted that the TTXS bros had communicated with Gg, this segment made clear that they care for him like they do for Dd ~ as family.

* dls mailed Gg a lot of fruit for sharing with the film crew. “Family member needs to be impressive” is a rough translation, but this line does defy simple translation because 排面 a highly cultural concept that has much to do with the equally complex, Chinese concept of face (which this article explains... somewhat adequately). The message to take home is that dls cared enough about Gg that he wanted to make sure Gg wouldn’t lose face in front of the film crew; that, by having enough gifts (fruits) for everyone, Gg wouldn’t be viewed as cheap or inadequate or stingy, or whatever adjective that wouldn’t befit his top idol status. Because dls saw Gg as a member of his family. 

* The prescription from hg had been mentioned in a previous LRLG rumour. 方子 is a Chinese medicine prescription, which, unlike Western formulations, is individualised both to the discomfort / ailment and to the “body constitution” of the person who'll take it, the latter deciding the kind of ailments the person is susceptible to, and which ingredients are expected to be more effective. Chinese medicine also places a strong emphasises on long-term conditioning, whether it’s for recovery from a certain condition or for general good health. A good 方子 is therefore a far more complex and personal thing than, say, a scribble of “paracetamol” / “acetaminophen” on a piece of paper. :D

* fg’s gift for Gg (xx) is something for the waist. A brace support, maybe? For example?

My favourite line in this segment is when hg asked what will Gg and Dd do when they reach hg’s age. Given that the last two items (the prescription and xx) were health-related, I interpreted it as hg worrying about Gg and Dd’s health when they grow old... with all the health problems they already have. It’s the kind of thing a worried parent say to their children ~ my mom has said the same thing to me as well. 😢

p6. “The Cat Paw”

Not quite sure what’s happening here ... not sure what the cat paw is. (Sorry!!) But that é in the translation is Dd’s signature laugh (collection here), which is written as 鵝 (”Goose”) in Chinese 😂.

p7. “The Cat Toy”

Dd appeared to be shopping for a cat’s toy (something that can “hook the cat” in the translation, such that the cat can entertain itself and not rely on human companionship as much). Gg had already bought the toy though and sounded quite proud of it, told Dd to return the toy. The implied cat was, of course, Nut (堅果 Jianguo)... which had been repeatedly referred to in LRLG’s posts as Gg’s daughter.

p7. “Cool vs Cute”

Gg is often viewed as cute, and Dd as cool. Did Dd dislike Gg taking cute pictures for public consumption? Were they scheming an exchange of image? :D

And that’s it for this issue! Ooh, this took unexpectedly long ... I apologise for the ridiculous delay between the original post and this commentary! 

(I wrote half of it, then RL struck and I forgot about it.) (I’m hopeless.) (I need a 方子 for poor memory!!)

[impalementation]

spike, angel, buffy & romanticism: part 3

part 1: “When you kiss me I want to die”: Angel and the high school seasons

part 2: “Love isn’t brains, children”: Enter Spike as the id

* 

“Something effulgent”: Season five and the construction of Spike the romantic

Prior to becoming a romantic interest, Spike is everything I discussed in the last section. He is an id and a mirror for Buffy, he’s prone to both romantic exaggeration and cutting realism, and his liminality suggests ambiguity. But outside of “Lovers Walk”, the writing doesn’t actually delve too deeply into Spike’s nature as a romantic. If you stopped the canon at “Restless”, you’d probably think that Spike’s love for Drusilla was intriguing, but that the show hadn’t really gone anywhere with the implications of it, and for all you knew, that might not be an important part of his character anymore. So one of the most interesting things about season five to me, is that in this season in which the writers first consciously, deliberately decide to explore the sexual and romantic tension between Spike and Buffy, they also emphasize Spike’s romanticism more than ever. The choice to define Spike by his romanticism is a choice that follows naturally from everything established about his character, but it was also not an inevitable choice. Therefore, it’s a choice worth looking at in some detail.

Consider everything that “Fool For Love” establishes about Spike, especially the things that contradict what was supposedly canon at the time. It makes Drusilla his sire instead of Angel, meaning that he is sired by a romantic connection, and as a direct result of heartbreak. It makes him a poet living in the middle of the Victorian era, an age at odds with his previous ages of “barely 200” and “126”. Meaning that the writing specifically decides to ignore its canon in order to associate him with an era in which passions would have been repressed (rather than the Romantic era of the early 1800’s or the modern energy of the early 1900’s). Moreover, the episode reveals his entire aesthetic and personality to essentially be a construct. But most tellingly of all, it reveals him to be an idealist. Spike is not just a performance artist; he yearns for the “effulgent”, for something “glowing and glistening” that the “vulgarians” of the world don’t understand. In other words, he yearns for something bigger and more beautiful than life: something romantic. Later, he chases after “death, glory, and sod all else.” Spike may be a “fool for love”, who has a romantic view of romantic love specifically, but the episode is very clear about the fact that he is also a romantic more generally. When Drusilla turns him, she doesn’t tempt him by telling him she’ll love him forever. She tempts him by offering him “something…effulgent”. (Which, in typical Spike form, the episode immediately undercuts by having him say “ow” instead of swooning romantically). The fact that “Fool For Love”, Spike’s major backstory episode, is so determined to paint him as a romantic--and in particular, a disappointed, frustrated romantic--that it is willing to contradict canon to do so, tells you that this choice was important for framing Spike and his new, ongoing thematic role.

I’ve talked in the past about how season five is all about the tension between the mythical and the mortal--between big, grand, sweeping narratives, and the reality of being human. Buffy is the Slayer, but she’s also just a girl who loses her mother. Dawn is the key, but she’s also just a confused and hormonal fourteen-year-old. Willow is a powerful witch, but she also just wants her girlfriend to be okay. Glory is a god, but she’s also a human man named Ben, and finds herself increasingly weakened by his emotions. And Spike embodies this tension perfectly. He’s a soulless vampire with a lifetime of bloodshed behind him, but he’s also this silly, human man who wants to love and be loved. He wants big, grand things, but every time they are frustrated by a Victorian society, a rejection, a chip, a pratfall, or dying with an “ow”. Furthermore, his season five storyline is all about the tension between loving in an exalted, yet often selfish way, versus loving in a “real” or selfless way. 

There was a fascinating piece a ways back that discussed how Spike’s attempts to woo Buffy in season five almost perfectly match the romantic narratives of Courtly Love. In the words of the author:

The term "Courtly Love" is used to describe a certain kind of relationship common in romantic medieval literature. The Knight/Lover finds himself desperately and piteously enamored of a divinely beautiful but unobtainable woman. After a period of distressed introspection, he offers himself as her faithful servant and goes forth to perform brave deeds in her honor. His desire to impress her and to be found worthy of her gradually transforms and ennobles him; his sufferings -- inner turmoil, doubts as to the lady's care of him, as well as physical travails -- ultimately lends him wisdom, patience, and virtue and his acts themselves worldly renown.

You can see for yourself how well that description fits Spike’s arc. He fixates on the torturous, abject nature of his love, and has it in his head that he can perform deeds and demonstrate virtue, and this will prove to Buffy that he is worthy of her. But despite Spike’s gradual ennobling over the course of the season, I think it would be a mistake to see the season as using the Courtly Love narrative uncritically, or even just ironically. The same way it would be a mistake to see season two as using the Gothic uncritically. Spike is as much Don Quixote as he is Lancelot. He is a character that deliberately tries to act out romantic tropes, giving the writing an opportunity to satirize those tropes, including the tropes of chivalric romance. In particular, the writing criticizes Spike’s (very chivalric) fixation on love as a personal agony, something that is more about pain--and specifically, his pain--than building a real relationship. Over and over in season five, he is forced to abandon these sorts of flattering romantic mindsets in favor of a more complicated reality. 

So at first, Spike’s “deeds” tend to be shallow and vaguely transactional. He tries to help Buffy in “Checkpoint” even though she doesn’t want it (and insults her when she doesn’t appreciate it), he asks “what the hell does it take?” when Buffy is unimpressed by him not feeding on “bleeding disaster victims” in “Triangle”, he rants bitterly at a mannequin when Buffy fails to be grateful to him for taking her to Riley in “Into the Woods”, and he is angry and confused when Buffy is unmoved by his offer to stake Drusilla in “Crush”. While these attempts to symbolically reject his evilness are startling for a soulless vampire, and although Spike certainly feels like he is fundamentally altering himself for Buffy’s sake, none of it is based on understanding or supporting Buffy in a way that she would actually find substantial. Moreover, he lashes out when his gestures fail to win her attention or affection. He has an idea in his head of how their romantic scenes should play out, and reacts petulantly when reality fails to live up to it. 

But these incidents of self-interested narrativizing are also continuously contrasted with scenes in which Spike reacts with real generosity, or is surprised when he realizes he’s touched something emotionally genuine. When Buffy seeks him out in “Checkpoint”, his mannerisms instantly change when he realizes she actually needs real help (“You’re the only one strong enough to protect them”), rather than the performed help he offered at the beginning of the episode. At the end of “Fool For Love” he’s struck dumb by Buffy’s grief, and his antagonistic posturing all evening melts away. He abandons his romantic vision of their erotic, life-and-death rivalry in favor of real, awkward emotional intimacy. In “Forever” he tries to anonymously leave flowers for Joyce, and reacts angrily when he’s denied—but this time not because he wanted something from Buffy. Simply because he wanted to do something meaningful. 

This contradictory behavior comes to a head in “Intervention”, the episode in which Spike finally begins to understand the difference between real and transactional generosity. Up until that point, Spike has been reacting both selfishly and unselfishly, but he hasn’t been able to truly distinguish between them, which is why he keeps repeating the same mistakes. Although he touches something real at the end of “Fool For Love”, for instance, he goes on to rifle through Buffy’s intimates in the very next episode. And so “Intervention” has Spike go to extremes of fakeness and reality. He gives up on having the real Buffy, and seeks out an artificial substitute that lets him live out his cheesiest romance novel scripts. It’s important that the Buffybot isn’t just a sexbot, even if he does have sex with her. She’s a bot he plays out romantic scenarios with the way he played them with Harmony in “Crush”, allowing him to almost literally live within a fiction. But then he “gives up” on having Buffy in a way that’s actually real, by offering up his life. He lets himself be tortured, and potentially killed, for no other reason than that to do otherwise would cause Buffy pain. The focus is on her pain, not his. For the first time, he acts like the Knight he’s been trying to be all along. He performs a grand, heroic deed that causes the object of his affection to see him in a different light, and even grant him a kiss. Yet ironically, as part of learning the difference between real and fake, he ceases to press for Buffy’s reciprocation. Through the end of season five, Spike continues to act the selfless Knight, assisting Buffy in her heroism without asking for anything in return. Which culminates in his declaration that he knows Buffy “will never love him”, even after he’s promised her the deed of protecting Dawn, and even though she allows a kind of intimacy by letting him back in her house. He proves that he sees those gestures for what they are, rather than in a transactional light. The irony of the way Spike fulfills the narrative of chivalric romance, is that his ennobling involves letting aspects of that narrative go. 

In a Courtly Love narrative, the object of the Knight’s affection is fundamentally pedestalized. The Knight himself might be flawed, but the woman he pines after is not. She is “divinely beautiful” and “unobtainable”, something above him and almost more than human. This is why it’s so comic that in Don Quixote, which was a direct satire of chivalric romance, Alonso Quixano’s “lady love” is a vulgar peasant farmgirl who has no idea who he is. (Think of the way Spike asks if Buffy is tough in “School Hard” or threatens to “take her apart” despite “how brilliant she is” in “The Initiative”, followed by scenes where Buffy is acting like the teenage girl she is. Or how Giles in “Checkpoint” says that Buffy has “acquired a remarkable focus” before cutting to Buffy yawning.). Although it’s true that Buffy is beautiful, and supernatural, and profoundly moral, she is also very human, and the writing is very concerned with that humanity. Season five in particular, as I’ve mentioned, is preoccupied with the duality of Buffy’s mythic and mortal nature. Thus it becomes significant that Buffy is assigned such a heightened role in Spike’s chivalric narrative. Just Spike is at once Lancelot and Don Quixote, Buffy is at once Achilles, Dulcinea, and a coming-of-age protagonist. 

And part of the “lesson” of Spike’s arc is for him to see both sides of the roles they embody. One of my favorite things about the scene in Buffy’s house in “The Gift” is how adroitly it conveys the dualities of both Buffy and Spike with simple, but poetic imagery and language. Buffy stands above Spike on her steps, conveying her elevated role, and Spike honors the way her heroic status has inspired him by physically looking up to her as he explains that he expects nothing from her. But by expecting nothing from her, and promising to protect her sister, he also honors the fact that she is a real person with no obligation to him, and a younger sister she cares about more than anything. He also honors his own duality by at once making Knightly promises, and acknowledging that he sees through his former delusions: “I know that I’m a monster, but you treat me like a man.” In “Fool For Love” he tried to acknowledge the same duality of realism and romance, by declaring to Cecily that “I know I’m a bad poet, but I’m a good man.” But at the time, he was an innocent, whose desire to be seen, and whose romantic avoidance of “dark, ugly things”, left him unprepared to understand how Cecily really saw him (similar to Spike’s insistence in “Crush” that what he and Buffy have “isn’t pretty, but it’s real” just before Buffy locks him out). Spike is a character defined simultaneously by continuous disillusionment and dogged aspiration, which is why he makes perfect sense as a character to embody a season torn between the pain of being human, and the wonder of the gift of love.

Fittingly, the season ends with Spike’s most devastating loss of innocence of all. He fails to be the hero for Buffy or Dawn (note that Knightly language he uses on the tower: “I made a promise to a lady”), and he loses the woman he loves. He may have become more virtuous, but unlike in a chivalric romance, that virtue wins him neither Buffy, nor something flattering like “world reknown.” The climax of the “The Gift” is full of romance—a god, a troll hammer, a damsel on a tower, a heroic self-sacrifice, a vampire transformed into a Knight—but the end result is that Buffy is dead, in part because he wasn’t good enough, and all that he and the Scoobies can do is grieve. Stories got Spike nothing, even when reality finally lived up to them. It is a swan song to the myths of childhood, and on the other side of Glory’s portal, Spike and the other characters will have to confront a world where those myths have been left behind.

part 4: “But I can’t fool myself. Or Spike, for some reason.”: Buffy and Spike as a blended self