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naughtyneganjdm · 3 months ago

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Christmas in Jackson - Chapter 8

Summary: Joel wakes up in the morning happy that he didn't take off on Y/N after their night together. Addicted to the way that she makes him feel, Joel decides that he wants to spend the rest of the day in bed with her before taking her somewhere special during the night.

Characters: Joel Miller, the reader (OC), etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61159651/chapters/160909797

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Naked Cuddling, Smut, Unprotected P in V, Rough Sex, Dominant Joel, Dirty Talking Joel, Romantic Joel, etc.

Notes: Most of this chapter is really just smutty. Thanks to those that read this story and for putting up with me! Especially since real life has made it rough to update this like I would like to. If you'd like to read previous chapters, check them out here.

Soft strokes over the back of Joel’s hand gradually pulled him from his sleep. His eyes tiredly fluttered to an open with an instinctive smile tugging at his lips when he realized where he was. Considering how his brain had been playing games with him last night, this morning could have turned out completely different if he didn’t make the right decision. But? He was glad he made the decision that he did. Leaving would have been a horrible choice. Both for him and her.

The way he felt right now was indescribable. There was a warmth inside of him that felt good. A happiness that he never expected to feel again. What had been a dark and burning thought of not being good enough for Y/N was something he was able to overcome with how much he cared for this woman.

What felt good was knowing that she appeared to feel the same way about him. By the way she was tracing her fingertips over his hand, it felt like she was in awe of him. Cherishing the touch, Joel nuzzled his nose in against the back of her neck. Placing a delicate kiss there had her inhaling sharply and he smiled.

“Good mornin’ beautiful,” Joel slurred, cuddling in closer to her. Hooking his fingers with hers, he gave them a firm squeeze. Hearing her breathing was a gift in itself for him. Everything felt right in the world in that moment and he was happy. He’d felt happiness in his life, but he questioned if he’d ever felt it this strongly towards someone in a romantic way. “You feeling okay?”

“Better than okay,” she announced, bringing his hand up to place a delicate kiss over the back of it. Humming out, Joel lifted enough to kiss at the side of her face causing her to smile. The sight of that took his breath away. How his body reacted to just the sight of her smile blew him away. “How about you?”

“I feel good,” he was honest, closing his eyes again when he got comfortable behind her. Right now? He had no interest in getting up because he liked the way that this felt way too much. Getting to cuddle her was something he had no interest in missing out on. In the past, he would have thought this kind of feeling was unrealistic. Now that he was feeling it, he was addicted to it. Never had he experienced such a need to hold and touch someone. To be near them.

“So does that mean you liked things last night?” she wondered, her curiosity getting the best of her when she looked over her shoulder. A smirk tugged at Joel’s lips with his eyes fluttering to a slow open. Arching his eyebrow at her had a chill flooding throughout her body.

“Yes, very much so,” he assured her, pulling her in closer to him so that way they were pressed up against one another. Truthfully? He was surprised she even had to ask him that. Throughout their interactions she had been pretty confident that she was good at sex. Now she seemed anxious with him, but he found it charming. “It was me that I was worried about. I worried things wouldn’t be good enough for you. I didn’t know if I would last long enough.”

“Everything was perfect for me,” she assured him, getting the most delicious moan from him when she rubbed her bottom in against his groin. Closing her eyes, she liked the warmth that pressed in over the side of her neck with Joel burying his nose there. Unhurriedly, she rolled her hips with the sensation of Joel’s body growing rigid against her. Knowing that she could have this kind of effect on his body drove her crazy with desire. Small, muted moans were vibrating against the side of her neck with one of Joel’s hands lowering to grasp firmly at her hips. With how hard he was holding onto her, she felt like she was his and she liked it. “I think I missed having you inside of me.”

“Well, we should fix that problem then,” Joel grunted, adjusting her body the way he needed it, pushing at her hip to angle her forward. Caressing down over her thigh with his rough fingertips, she looked back over her shoulder with her eyes connecting with his. Leaning in just enough to steal a quick kiss from her had her panting against his mouth. This was so good that sometimes he didn’t know whether to believe it was real or not. Dragging his mouth away from hers, Joel licked his lips and tipped his head to look down between them. Pushing his hand beneath the blanket, he curled his fingers around the shaft of his erection. Stroking at his body, he made sure that he was fully prepared for her before pressing his hips forward. Teasing the tip of his cock through her sensitive folds had her purring out and it made him smile. A slow drag up and then down had her hips rocking back toward his eager for him to enter her. Repeating the motion several times provoked her breathing to grow louder. Just from this alone had her incredibly wet which turned him on even more. She yearned for him just as much as he did her. Keeping his eyes locked on their bodies, he led the swollen tip to her entrance and unhurriedly sank into her. Together they moaned out in unison causing a fire to flood throughout his veins. Having the tight walls of her body enveloping his cock felt incredible and he knew he could easily lose himself inside of her if he didn’t focus. It felt that good. Bottoming out had her crying out, her hand dropping down to grasp at his thigh drawing out a raspy moan from him that she loved to hear. In that moment, he stayed stagnant wanting her to feel all of him. Lifting his hand, he grasped at her chin keeping a firm hold of it which elicited a moan from her that drove him wild. “Is this what your pussy wanted? My big cock filling it?”

“Yes,” she whimpered, her eyes slamming shut and her hips shaking with the way things felt. Releasing her chin, Joel palmed at her breast. Teasing the flesh, he stroked the tip of his index finger in circular motions around her nipple causing it to harden into a tight bud. Sucking in a sharp breath of air, he allowed his touch to continue down over her abdomen until his hand reached between her thighs. As soon as his rough fingertips connected with her sensitive clit, it had her crying out. The lack of movement ached, but in the best of ways. Joel’s thick cock was stretching her and filling her in ways that made her feel on top of the world “You feel so fucking good.”

“Funny, I was thinking the same thing about you,” Joel slurred against the side of her neck, the roughness of his short beard scratching at her flesh sending chills throughout her body. The circular motion of his fingers over her sensitive bundle of nerves had her arching up toward his caress drawing only a tiny bit of his cock to pull from her. “Is it bad I want to be like this forever? Have you full of my cock?”

“No,” she whined, her hand reaching down to curl her fingers around Joel’s wrist while he continued to touch her. “I love the way this feels too.”

“Do you like the way my big cock fills you right up?” Joel growled against her ear having her trembling back against him. Hearing him talking dirty to her had chills flooding throughout her body. There was a darkness to his tone when he said it and she liked it. She liked it a lot. Another whimper escaped her with him nibbling at her earlobe. “Your tight little pussy feels so good around me.”

God, she was a fucking mess. He had her in the palm of his hand and he knew it. By the amused rumble of a sound she released, she knew she was wrapped around his finger. By now she was a panting mess. Releasing his wrist, she instead grasped firmly at his hip causing him to snicker against the side of her neck, “Please.”

“Please what?” Joel’s palm slid up from between her thighs, up over her abdomen and between the valley of her breasts. Grasping faintly at her face, Joel started leaving wet kisses over her jawline with her crying out again. He knew what she was asking from him, but he was drawing things out. Enjoying the way she longed for this.

“Please move,” she begged of him, cooing out when he gave her what she wanted. Unhurriedly pulling his hips back, Joel growled against her flesh when he pushed forward. Taking his time rolling his hips behind her had soft smacking sounds filling the air with every thrust he made. Tiny winces escaped her with every deep plunge his manhood made inside of her warmth. Digging her fingertips into his thigh, she sucked in a sharp breath of air and closed her eyes tightly. Everything felt amazing. Each thrust was drawn out, and, in this position? She could feel every ridge of Joel’s cock inside of her. With his movements, he was hitting just the right spots having her a shaking mess. “Joel.”

“I want you to be mine,” he claimed, nipping at her jaw. The grasp he had on her face grew stronger and she licked her lips. Hearing that was thrilling. Gradually, his thrusts started to grow both in strength and speed drawing out the most delicious sounds from her. Moaning against her flesh had her purring out and he found himself lost inside of her. “And more than anything I want to be yours.”

“I want that too,” she admitted, doing her best to rock her hips back against him meeting his thrusts. That was true. Being with Joel was a feeling she was not used to, but she yearned for it. No one had this kind of effect on her. And she wanted more of it. Having him holding onto her like he was made her feel like she was his. And he was having his way with her in the best way possible. Honestly? She didn’t want this to end. Purring out, she tipped her head back when Joel’s hand returned between her thighs. The contact his fingers made with her clitoris drew out a cry that had him growling once more against the side of her neck. Putting a decent amount of pressure into his caress over her sensitive bundle of nerves had her breathing growing broken. They weren’t being quiet. For a short amount of time he tried to remember if any of the guests they had at the inn were near her room, but after a while he realized that he didn’t care. Being inside of her and having her reacting to things the way she was felt way too good. And more than anything he loved getting her to cry and pant out his name. “Please don’t stop.”

“Yes ma’am,” Joel continued his thrusts from behind her, the sounds of his hips smacking up against her bottom getting louder. The sounds of her pleasure grew more desperate. Bucking harder up against her, he took notice of the way her body was shaking. How her hips eagerly rocked between his thrusts and his fingertips circling at her clit. How her body was reacting, he knew that she was close to an orgasm. Keeping up with the pace that he had set, Joel hummed when her tight walls started to contract around his cock. And there was the best gift he could have asked for. Hearing her crying out his name over and over when he brought her to that moment of euphoria. There she was, a trembling mess in his arms and she was entirely his. Thrusting forward once more, Joel buried himself deeply into her and stayed still wanting to experience the way her walls flexed around his erection throughout her orgasm. Giving her time, Joel smiled and nuzzled his nose in against the side of her neck. “Roll onto your stomach.”

Doing as she was instructed, she shakily rolled onto her stomach and whined with the way Joel’s manhood pulled from her body. Getting into position, she cuddled her head in against the pillows. Everything felt like it was spinning. She could feel her heart hammering away inside of her chest. There was an ache at her core and her hips were still somewhat tremoring. The empty feeling she was left with had her yearning for more. Purring out, she was happy when Joel started to crawl in over her. Tender kisses covered her right shoulder with him lowering down in over her. Chills flooded her with the warmth of his body over hers. Arching her hips, she desperately wanted him back inside of her and it had an amused rumble escaping Joel’s throat. Reaching between them, Joel placed the tip of his cock at her entrance and sank back into her. Burying his nose in against the side of her neck, he let out a deep raspy moan with how good it felt. Adjusting his body, his hands covered hers with their fingers hooking together.

Setting a steady pace with his thrusts, Joel covered the side of her neck and shoulders with kisses. Closing her eyes, she loved having the weight of him over her. It was easy to feel every part of him with him thrusting inside of her this way. And she rewarded him with the sounds of her crying out his name.

“You feel so good,” Joel’s deep southern drawl was raspy, his words vibrating against her cheek. Turning just enough, she managed to bring their lips together in a longing kiss that had Joel humming out.

“Harder,” she begged against his lips whimpering when he delivered what she requested. The smacking sounds increased with his hips bucking up against her bottom. The power of his movements had the bed slightly smacking up against the wall. Winces were escaping his throat and his fingers squeezed tighter around hers. “Yes, that’s it.”

Taking that as encouragement, Joel’s movements grew stronger with her body trembling beneath him. Squeezing tightly to Joel’s fingers, she felt a fire growing in the pit of her stomach and she whined, “Joel...”

There was a rushing flooding to her head. Squeezing her eyes shut, she knew that she was a mess. The areas that the tip of his cock were repeatedly hitting felt amazing but at the same time had her nervous. Trying to pull her hips up and away only had Joel following her movements. Burying her head further into the pillow, she pulled her hips up and away from Joel with a pitiful sound. How hard she was shaking and the way that her heartbeat was so loud inside of her head shocked her. Joel was smiling against the side of her neck, his groans loud as he pampered her flesh with tiny kisses. Looking down between them Joel let out a pleased sound with her body trembling beneath him.

“Fuck, I am so sorry,” she panted with Joel snickering against the side of her neck. Reaching down, his fingers teased through her sensitive folds, caressing at her already shaking body.

“For squirting? Please don’t apologize for that,” Joel hummed, rolling her onto her back. With a half smirk, Joel shook his head when their eyes connected. “I reckon I’m the furthest thing from offended.”

“You’re arrogant,” she huffed out, whimpering with Joel caressing his thumb in over the inside of her thigh. “But it looks good on you.”

“By the way you just apologized to me, you’re not used to squirting,” Joel concluded, licking his lips. His loud breathing had his chest rising and falling heavily. A wicked smirk tugged at his features and it had her heart skipping a beat. God, he was so hot. And with the way his messy hair was wet, she couldn’t get enough of him. “Of course that would make me arrogant. I like that I can make you feel good.”

Adjusting her body, Joel pushed her legs up so they were resting over his arms when he balanced his hands on the bed. Nodding between them, he licked his lips once more and sighed, “Put me back inside of you.”

Following his instructions, she gave him a nod. Reaching down, she curled her fingers around Joel’s girthy cock and let out a pant. The sound that Joel made when she touched him was so attractive. Leading the swollen tip back between her folds had him firmly smacking up against her when he filled her completely. The thrust had her breasts bouncing upward with the movement and her cry filled the room. Right now, his movements were rough and harder causing her to drop her hands down to grasp at his wrists. Eager to hold onto something. Every thrust felt incredible and she knew this was dirty, but she liked it. Last night, things were more about the two of them connecting. Right now? This was about sex. But? She wasn’t complaining. In fact, this felt incredible. For so long, she was used to men that wanted her to be in charge of things. It was nice having Joel take control. This felt amazing and it was nice the things that Joel was capable of making her feel.

“You weren’t kidding when you said you were big,” she lifted her head to watch the deep plunges his cock made inside of her repeatedly. Again, how couldn’t he be arrogant with the things that she was saying and the way her body was reacting to him? Pressing his forehead to hers, Joel snickered with how tightly she was clinging to him. “God.”

“I’m going to come,” he announced with a deep, raspy moan. Tipping his head back, his jaw flexed and the veins in his neck became more prominent. Lifting up just enough, she brought their lips together in a hungry kiss that took both of their breaths away. Keeping up with his thrusts, Joel groaned out with his testicles tightening up. Pumping her full of his cum, he continued to pound into her throughout his orgasm. Allowing her legs to drop down, Joel nipped at her bottom lip with her right arm hooking around his shoulders to keep him close. With his hips coming to a falter, Joel gave one final thrust before lowering in over her. Cuddling in over her, he loved the way she still stroked at his shoulders and wanted him near. “I don’t want to leave your tight little pussy.”

“Then don’t,” she panted against his flesh, clinging tightly to him. They were both shaking with their breathing broken. Whimpering out, she liked the way it felt with Joel’s cock throbbing and twitching inside of her. Instead of moving, he did what she said allowing himself to grow soft inside of her. Kissing at her jawline, he hummed with how amazing everything felt.

“I have to call into work. I’ll tell them the snow made it impossible for me to leave,” Joel slurred, his head lifting enough to lock eyes with her. “If you’re okay with it, I’d like to spend all day with you today. In bed…”

“Having sex?” she inquired with Joel smirking as she palmed in over the side of his face. Brushing his damp hair out of his eyes drew forth a smile from him that took her breath away. “I’m not going to tell you no.”

“Sex is part of it, but I want us to be together right now,” he whispered, kissing in over the center of her palm. “I just want to be with you as much as I possibly can. I want to take advantage of the way you make me feel.”

“How do I make you feel?” she wondered, desperate to hear his thoughts since he was originally so hell bent on hiding himself from her. Everything about this man drove her wild with desire for him.

“Happy. Warm,” he gave short answers at first, considering what he wanted to tell her. Knowing that she brought him happiness was a good thing. Especially since she knew Joel was not the kind of person he was displaying himself to be with her right now normally. “You make me feel like I’m still meant to be here and I haven’t felt that way in a very long time. I don’t feel like an emotionless robot with you. As I said before, you feel like home. And being with you? It just feels right.”

“Careful Joel Miller,” she whispered, brushing his hair back over his ear. Lifting up, she teased her lips in against his making him smile. “You might make me believe that there is more to you than you want me to see.”

“I want you to see it,” Joel countered, shaking his head and peppering tender kisses against her lips. “I know this is fast and I reckon people would think we were crazy, but I really like you. More than I should. And I don’t want to picture a life where I don’t have you near. Now that I have you, I don’t wanna let you go.”

“I feel the same way,” she assured him, her thumb tracing over his jawline through his facial hair having his brown eyes growing hopeful. “I don’t care what other people think though. And I think it’s safe to say that you don’t either.”

“Yeah,” Joel snickered, his nose wrinkling with him leaning into her touch. Suddenly, he thought about last night and what he had almost done. Leaving would have been the biggest mistake he could have ever made right now. “I need to tell you something.”

Giving him her full attention, she continued to stroke her fingers through his hair and he liked it, “After you fell asleep last night, I thought about leaving,” Joel was honest, his face scrunching up in disappointment with his actions, “But before you think it has anything to do with you, it doesn’t. I just don’t think I’m good enough for you. And I’m worried I’m going to ruin things for you.”

“That’s something we’re going to have to work on,” she hushed him realizing that he was very upset with himself. “Because you are good enough for me. And you’re not going to ruin things for me because for the first time in a long time, I’m happy. You bring out something in me that hasn’t been there in a very long time.”

“That sounds familiar,” Joel noted, nuzzling his nose in against hers wincing when he pulled his hips away from her and laid down in beside her. Staying close to her, Joel hooked his fingers with hers and kissed at her shoulder. “I bet you didn’t think the first time you saw me that we’d be like this after a few days, huh?”

“The first time I saw you I thought you were incredibly hot,” she admitted provoking a snort from Joel with him tipping his head to stare out at her. That wasn’t a lie. “I was attracted to you immediately. I thought it was just me being crazy after getting off that plane. When I saw you, I didn’t immediately regret coming here because at least you were nice to look at. And then when I was still attracted to you even after you turned out to be such a dick that night? Well, I thought I completely lost it.”

“I’m sorry,” Joel apologized nuzzling his nose in against the side of her neck getting her to giggle and turn in closer to him. “I’m not very good with new people and I know that.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” she hushed him, her fingers reaching out to brush against the side of his face. “Am I the first guest you’ve slept with?”

“You’re the first person I’ve slept with since I moved into town,” Joel confessed, sucking in a sharp breath of air. The expression she gave him made him nod and he shrugged his shoulders. That was probably bad to admit, but he didn’t lie to her when he told her that it had been a very long time since he had been with someone. “Don’t get me wrong, in my past I was wild, but here…?”

“Wow,” she was shocked to hear that and by the way Joel’s face was red she knew that he was embarrassed. Just from the two times that they had slept together, she would have never pictured that. “You don’t have sex like someone who hasn’t had it in years.”

“Well, I mean I jerk off,” Joel reasoned with her getting her to laugh before pressing a kiss against the center of his chest. “So I guess I built up a good endurance for things?”

“That’s good to know,” she teased him, patting the center of his chest playfully.

“How long have you been broken up from your boyfriend?” he questioned, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat when he thought about her life outside of Jackson.

“It’s been a few months,” she answered him cuddling in closer to him while they rest together at the center of the bed. “I don’t really know what I saw in him to be honest with you. I think I was just sick of being lonely so I accepted the first person that gave me attention when he was really just abusing his power at the hospital. We had to keep our relationship hidden even though we were together a lot. I think I just liked the attention I got from him because it made me feel special.”

“Just because he was a dickhead doesn’t mean you weren’t special,” Joel reminded her, wrapping her up in his arms and getting comfortable again beneath her. Thinking about something for a moment, Joel licked his lips and hummed. “Do I have a bigger dick than he did?”

“You have a bigger dick than most of the people I’ve been with,” she responded with a laugh getting a kick out of the fact Joel seemed proud of that. The expression over his face gave it away that he liked hearing her say that. “It’s interesting how some of the most reserved men have the biggest dicks, while some of the most arrogant aren’t that impressive.”

They both laughed and took a moment of silence for them to enjoy each other just for a little while. By the time that he spoke up again they were both pretty comfortable in bed.

“I was surprised that you weren’t lying about the whole blowjob thing you know,” Joel blurt out, stroking his fingers down over her shoulders. It made her laugh out loud, not expecting that to be the first thing he said again to start their conversation back up. “I made you stop last night because I knew if I didn’t I was gonna erupt and then this whole interaction would be cut short.”

“I’m glad you’ve enjoyed things,” she responded with a small yawn, growing more relaxed in his arms. “Tell me facts about you that won’t make you uncomfortable. Like what are some of your favorite things? What do you dislike?”

“Uhm,” Joel thought for a moment about what to tell her, looking down and finding himself in awe of her with the way she was laying in over his chest. “Well, food wise I’m not the biggest fan of pancakes. Nor do I really like orange juice. But I really like coffee. And usually I like it black. The stronger the better.”

“I picked up on the coffee love,” she traced her fingertips over the lengths of his chest drawing tiny shapes over his flesh. “The black coffee love I do have to question because I prefer having lots of flavor to drown out the taste of it.”

“That ruins it,” Joel grumbled under his breath, amused with the expression that she gave him. Thinking again, Joel tried to come up with something to say when he shrugged his shoulders. “I like really cheesy action flicks. The cheesier the better.”

“Oh?” her eyebrow arched up as she lifted her head slightly to meet his eyes in a stare. “You see, that surprises me because you had on the Christmas movie channel when we were at your home.”

“Eh, I put that on in the background sometimes when I’m working around the house,” he stated with a scoff, waving his free hand about. “Christmas movies used to be a big thing when I was younger in my family. It’s hard to let go of that.”

Getting him to talk about things he liked in terms of music and random things was her way of getting to know Joel better. Halfway through them talking, Joel did grab his cell phone to call in to work to say he wouldn’t be able to make it. After a while she found herself laying in his arms thinking about things.

“What happens if Tommy realizes that you are not at home?” she pushed getting Joel to smile when she palmed across the lengths of his chest.

“I’m just here to be here sometimes,” Joel informed her, his breathing growing louder when she placed a kiss over the center of his chest. “I’m good at fixing things, but everyone else is better at the other stuff. I have an endless knowledge about construction. Not running an inn.”

“Fair enough,” she huffed, pressing in closer to him when she felt somewhat cold. Joel’s arm dropped further down her body squeezing firmly around her and it made her smile. Thinking about this morning and last night made her swallow down hard. “Just so you know, I don’t usually do this whole thing.”

“What?” Joel didn’t know what she was referring to.

“Unprotected sex with a stranger,” she blurt out with Joel nodding his head about. “I mean, you’re not a stranger, but…”

“I get it,” Joel hushed her, tapping his fingers against her hip. Using his other hand, he curled his fingers in underneath her chin to get her to tip her head back to stare up at him. “I haven’t had sex in years. I already told you that. And you already told me that you were healthy. I reckon its mostly my fault for not having condoms, but I haven’t had condoms in a very long time because I didn’t expect to have sex with someone. I guess I assumed that you were on birth control since you wanted me to…”

“I am,” she interrupted him, looking up at him with big eyes when he considered the idea that he had come inside of her twice already. “Thinking back on it, I don’t think I’ve had unprotected sex with anyone. I’ve done things differently with you. I trust you.”

“Oh,” Joel was surprised to hear that, taking in a sharp breath of air when a sense of arrogance flooded through him. Instead of being uncomfortable with the discussion, he seemed to actually like the idea of what she was saying. “So did you like me pumping you full of my come?”

“Very much,” she didn’t even take time to consider it, her face growing hot with her confession. “It makes me feel like I’m yours. Like I belong to you and feeling your cock throbbing inside of me…it feels phenomenal. I liked it a lot.”

“You want some more?” he growled with his palm extending down over her bottom to give it a firm squeeze. “I think he’s ready for another round if you are.”

“Hmmm…” she bit down on her bottom lip and then took her time to crawl in over Joel again getting a wicked smirk to tug at his features. “I’ll take as much as I can get of it today.”

----

Giggling, Y/N couldn’t help but laugh with Joel playfully teasing kisses over the side of her neck. They were underneath the covers with Joel laying over her and their legs tangled together. It felt nice with the way things were. Joel wasn’t kidding when he told her that he wanted to spend all day in bed with her. They mostly just spend their time either talking, cuddling or having sex. More than they probably should have, but both of them were addicted to the way that it felt.

“I like your hands,” she announced, lifting Joel’s hand to gaze upon it with Joel kissing down over her jawline and toward her neck. “Then again? I think I like everything about you.”

“The feeling is mutual,” Joel snickered against her flesh, drawing his head back enough to look down upon her with a longing stare. “You’re easy to like.”

“You may be the first person to tell me that,” she smiled when Joel kissed at the back of her hand and nestled his cheek in against it.

“And you may be the only person ever in my life to tell me that you like everything about me. Because if you haven’t noticed, I can be an intimidating asshole,” Joel pointed out with a smirk, adjusting his body weight with her tracing over his face. “I’ve mastered the resting bitch face look.”

“I think it’s part of your charm,” she dragged her thumb out across his full bottom lip, sucking in a sharp breath of air with Joel pressing a tender kiss against the pad of her thumb. “I do enjoy your laughter and your smile though. You have the cutest dimples.”

“It’s always the dimples that warm people up to me,” Joel shook his head, dropping down to press kisses over her lips again. Hearing the sound of a knock on the door, Joel pulled back the covers and looked toward the other room where the knock came from. “That’s probably the pizza.”

Cautiously moving from over her, Joel stood up from the bed and headed for the other room, stopping when she called out to him. Turning to face her, she pointed down and it made him laugh, “Joel, you’re naked.”

“And?” Joel breathed out, with her face flushing over.

“You’re going to give someone a heart attack if they see you naked. Especially since the person works in the same place as you since you ordered it from the bar here,” she reminded him getting him to roll his eyes and reach for one of the pillows. “Joel!”

“The stuff is covered,” Joel kept his hand firmly over the pillow that was hiding his naked body. Heading for the door, Joel was quick to pull it open seeing the eyes of the person before him growing wide when they realized his state of undress. Pointing toward the pizza, Joel held his hand out and waited for them. “I’ll take the pizza now.”

“Of course Mr. Miller, I’m sorry,” the man was quick to hand Joel over the pizza box, dropping his head down with color flooding into his face. “They just charged the card you have on record, so you don’t have to worry about anything.”

“Thank you,” Joel went to step back, letting out a surprised sound when Y/N moved in beside him. Instead of being naked like him, she had grabbed his plaid shirt and had only buttoned up a few of the buttons. Handing out some money, Joel tipped his head to the side with his eyes narrowing. “What are you doing?”

“You forgot the tip,” she held out the money and the man nervously shook his head at the idea of getting a tip. “Trust me, you deserve this.”

“Thank you ma’am,” the man accepted the tip and was quick to walk away leaving the two of them alone.

Closing the door, she gave Joel a small glare and grabbed the pizza from him as she headed back toward the bedroom. Throwing his hands up in the air, Joel tossed the pillow back onto the bed when he entered the room.

“I don’t see what the big deal was, it’s not like I was flashing anyone,” Joel teased, taking a seat in the bed beside her. Grabbing one of the sheets, Joel pulled it in over his lap and got comfortable by resting his back against the headboard.

“That’s how that person is going to picture you from here on out and he’s probably going to gossip. Since that’s a big thing here in this town,” she insisted, throwing open the lid of the pizza box when she set it in the middle of the bed. Swiftly, Joel leaned in to grab a piece for himself and tipped his head back to dramatically take the piece into his mouth. With a smirk, she grabbed one for herself with Joel shrugging his shoulders.

“Let them,” Joel spoke with a mouthful, visibly not worried about what anyone would think. “I already told that one guy at the bar that you were mine. This just proves that we have sex and we get hungry after having sex. No big deal really.”

“Right,” she was amused that he was so nonchalant about things because when she first met him, Joel seemed like a very private person that wouldn’t be okay with that kind of stuff. Joel finished off his first piece of pizza pretty fast before reaching for another. “I feel like someone could easily live here for a while. You have so much in one place.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Joel agreed with her dropping his head back while he chewed. “We do well. People seem to like it here. It’s an easy job and I don’t have to drive far for work. So I can’t complain really. This pizza isn’t the best pizza in town, but it’s convenient.”

“Do you know what time it is?” she looked around, her eyes falling to a clock. When she realized it was the evening already, she let out an amused sound. “We really did spend all day in bed.”

“Well, not all day,” Joel countered, reaching for the tissues that were on her nightstand to pull out one to wipe his hands off. “I was actually thinking about that. While the idea of spending all day in bed with you sounds nice, I was wondering if you would like to take a journey with me. There’s something they do here at night that I think you would really like.”

“My body could use the break,” she admitted knowing that she was worn out after all they had done. Really, she was surprised she didn’t get a nap in there somewhere because she was tired after everything. “What were you thinking?”

“It’s a surprise,” he insisted, folding his arms out in front of his bare chest. “I figure we’ll finish up with the pizza, get a shower in and then I can drive you over there. So you don’t have to walk.”

“Such a gentleman,” she snickered getting him to chuckle at her response before leaning in to pepper a few more kisses against her lips. “I just look forward to any time that I get to spend with you.”

“Then we should take advantage of that,” he hummed against her lips, nuzzling his nose tenderly in against hers.

“I think we’ve taken advantage of a lot of things already today,” she noted, her words vibrating against his bottom lip eliciting a groan to fall from him with the way it felt. Motioning her to wait a second, Joel raised his finger and lifted up just enough to push aside one of the blinds to look down below at the town. “What are you doing?”

“Making sure that they eventually got to the streets,” he answered with a grunt, lowering back down in the bed beside her. After the storm last night, he knew that most of the time they were quick to plow the snow, but sometimes people got lazy. Thankfully? Since he had something planned, he was happy to see that they actually eventually plowed the snow. “My plans wouldn’t be very successful if we weren’t able to use my truck to drive where I need us to go.”

“About that,” she spoke up, closing up the box of pizza after they were done. Setting it beside the bed, she turned onto her arm and placed her hand in over the center of Joel’s chest. “Are you going to get in trouble with people finding out you were here this whole time?”

“I’m the owner,” Joel reminded her with a wrinkle of his nose, his hand reaching up to cover hers. “Tommy is kinda used to me showing up whenever I want anyways. Plus? If he knew that we had sex, I would get away with it. He’d be excited.”

“Your brother is a very confusing person,” she chuckled at the thought of what he said about Tommy realizing that he was right. “I thought he was this very sweet, innocent man and he’s got a mouth on him”

“I told you that people are biased because he is nice to them. If you would have known Tommy when he was younger, he was a smoking, foul mouthed little boy,” Joel informed her, shaking his head when he thought back on their past together. “He was always smoking in places he shouldn’t have been so I was constantly yelling at him to put it out. Tommy has these people believing that he is the good boy when he was always the chaotic one. It wasn’t until Maria that he calmed the hell down.”

“No kidding,” she was starting to learn that Tommy was surprising her more than Joel in terms of the people that they were.

“Oh yeah. Do you know how often I was bailing his ass out of jail in Texas? The boy was always in trouble. Getting into bar fights and calling me early in the AM to bail him out so he didn’t get stuck all weekend. Tommy was a mess,” Joel recalled what his little brother was like, grunting something under his breath. “I was really worried about him when we separated.”

“Why did he go one way and you went the other?” she inquired, noticing that was a question where Joel was uncomfortable again. “It seems like you felt responsible for him, so when you said you went to Boston and he continued to travel, I was surprised to hear that.”

“Something happened that put some tension between us,” Joel swallowed down hard, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat as he spoke. It looked like he was deeply considering what to say next as he shook his head. “Something big happened in our lives. We both tried to deal with it for a year or so. I was miserable, he was trying to help me, but he was failing. I got us in some trouble that we were both lucky to get out of and I think he was mad at me for letting it happen. So he ran away from me and I let him.”

“You two seem okay now,” she only mentioned what she knew because she had promised not to push Joel too far when it came to his past.

“We do our best. There are some days where we want to kill one another, but we had a talk about the past,” he explained with a nervousness in the way that he spoke, “Just once though. But we had an understanding about things. We just try to avoid bringing it up because it’s something neither one of us wanted to approach. We don’t want to live in the past and talk about it all the time.”

“And here I was spilling my guts out to you and your family,” she felt silly that she had opened up so much to Joel and his family about her past. “It probably made both you and Tommy very uncomfortable with me just unloading all of my past woes on you both.”

“Now, I wouldn’t go that far,” Joel hushed her trying to get her to stop thinking that way. “We handled that perfectly fine because it didn’t have anything to do with us. You needed someone to talk to. We understood that. We just want to forget our pasts. What you needed and what I need are two different things. In terms of our pasts.”

“Fair enough,” she sighed, depositing another loving kiss over the center of Joel’s chest. After a moment of silence, she exhaled loudly and let out an extended breath. “How about we take that shower now? And then we can head out to wherever you want to go?”

“Sounds good,” he agreed, getting up from the bed and following her into the bathroom while she started up the shower.

Sharing a shower with Joel reminded her of what it was like when they were at his home together doing this the last time. There was a lot of touching and affectionate moments between the two of them. There was no sex, but there was a fair amount of intimacy. They just wanted to take care of one another and be near each other. That was probably the best thing about the two of them. How quickly they grew comfortable enough with one another. Nothing was awkward between them. Everything felt right.

They took their time getting ready since the sun wasn’t down just yet, but by the time it was dark Joel led them out of the inn to his truck. At first he let her see where he was driving, but the closer they got to wherever his destination was, he asked her to keep her eyes closed. It was a pretty big deal for him because he wanted it to be a surprise.

Originally, she gave him a hard time about him making her cover her eyes, but she actually thought it was pretty cute. She just didn’t want to embarrass him about how much this actually touched her. Joel didn’t seem like the big surprise type, so this was very charming of him.

Even when they got wherever they were headed, Joel had instructed her to keep her hands where they were. He didn’t want her to cheat. Getting out of the truck first, Joel had come around to help her get out. It was hard moving around with her doing as he asked in keeping her eyes covered. When she was out, he covered her eyes with his hands and helped lead her wherever they were going by walking behind her.

“You are taking this very seriously,” she realized noticing that Joel wasn’t talking much while they walked through the snow. “You should know that I trust you by the way because I wouldn’t normally be okay with this whole scenario. You could be walking me to my death.”

“Obviously you have trust in me after everything today,” Joel whispered in her ear, the warmth of his breath drawing chills down her spine. Kissing at the side of her face made her smile when they came to a stop. Listening carefully, she heard the sound of bells jangling and it wasn’t what she expected. “I’m going to move my hands, okay?”

Staying quiet, she finally opened her eyes when Joel’s hands pulled from over her face allowing her to drop her hands down. Moving in beside her, Joel was watching her with an amused expression seeing the awe that filled her when she saw the horses and the sleigh that was covered in Christmas lights that was before them.

“I thought this was the kind of thing you might like,” he claimed waving his hand about in the direction of the sleigh. “I always thought these kind of things were cheesy, but with how much you like Christmas? I thought you might appreciate it. During the day they do a ride through one of the parks and at night, they do rides through the city.”

“How have I not seen this yet?” she stepped aside to get a look at the horses, getting permission to be able to pet one of them from the person who ran this whole thing. “I would have seen something like this in my time out.”

“They start doing them tomorrow. It’s a special thing they only do closer to Christmas,” Joel explained to her, joining her to pet the horse carefully. “I pulled some strings in order to do this a day early and my friend here agreed.”

“This is beautiful,” she declared, surprised that Joel would even come up with something like this in the first place.

“Not as beautiful as you,” Joel commented having more color flood to her face even beyond what was already there from it being cold out. Extending his hand, Joel motioned her toward the back of the sleigh. “My lady.”

“Oh, kind sir,” she played into it and allowed him to help her onto the sleigh. Getting comfortable in the seat, Joel was quick to follow her in. Wrapping his arm around her, Joel had her cuddling in closer to him to keep her warm while his friend got prepared for the ride. “This is cute. The sleigh? The lights? I don’t think I’ve seen anything like this. They have carriage rides in the city, but nothing like this.”

“You’re cute,” Joel slurred, leaning in to nuzzle his nose in against the side of her face pulling forth a big smile from her. “I thought you might like this. People seem to go pretty crazy for them when they are running.”

As the horses started to move, Joel squeezed his arms tightly around her bringing her closer, “Just sit back and relax as this will be a while.”

“I look forward to it,” she leaned further into Joel, one of her hands hooking with his. What was crazy was how fast all of this happened. Joel went from being someone she could barely stand to someone she never wanted to be away from. Jackson, Wyoming was a mistake. Somewhere she didn’t want to end up, yet here she was. In the arms of the grumpy inn keeper and feeling happier than she had in years. “So tell me Joel, are you usually this romantic?”

“Never,” he grunted, pressing a kiss at her temple when they finally reached town. What was cute was that this was made to feel magical. The glowing of the Christmas lights, the sounds of the bells and how slow the ride was made this feel enchanting. Almost dream like. And she was very thankful to be able to experience it. In her past relationships, no one had worked as hard to do something this nice for her and she was falling even harder for the man who had her wrapped up in his arms. “But you’re special and you deserve it.”

----

Tags: @jdmorganz @carolineesnell @ayumi-wolf @dilfsandmartinis @christinamadsen

@brittmb115 @thegirlwiththemostcake3

#Joel Miller #Joel Miller fanfiction #Joel Miller Smut #Pedro Pascal #The Last of Us #Joel Miller x reader #Joel Miller x you #Joel Miller Imagine #Christmas in Jackson #The Last of Us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #Pedro Pascal Characters fanfiction

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theorist-fox · 8 months ago

Text

Takes practice

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader

Crossposting from AO3.

Part 1 >> Part 2

The bit regarding the satellite phones and telemarketers was inspired by the first chapters of Shadowed by Tarajanee.

Absolutely adore that work and I thought those scenes at the beginning were lovely!

Word count: 13k

Summary: Simon is deployed for the first time since the beginning of your relationship. Instead of finding purpose in keeping the world clean, he finds it in keeping himself alive, because he's never been this eager to come home.

18+

CW: smut!!! dry humping, mutual masturbation, thigh fucking, P in V. Fluff, this is very fluffy. Soft Simon Riley, Simon is absolutely fucking whipped. Self-deprecating thoughts, intrusive thoughts, angst if you squint so don't squint and you'll only get yearning and love making.

Masterlist 🦊 | Series Masterlist 🦊

Simon doesn’t remember your eyes.

He’s been clawing at his face, both literally and metaphorically, because each time he closes his eyelids to succumb to exhaustion, he sees your face.

And you’re pretty. So much. He envisions the curve of your smile and how your lips part to give way to your teeth. The lines at the corners that scrunch your nose and how it flushes when it’s too cold out. He has memorized the shape of your brows for every expression. Knows the line of your cheekbones and how they swell under your eyes when you smile.

Your face is lovely, even when he conjures it in his head. But when your form breaks through the mist, he gets startled every time. Because he can’t see your eyes.

It's like a mock picture of you. A mimicry gone bad. You’re there, fresh and real, whispering sweet words to him, tossing a quip, or moaning breathlessly as he remembers the way he’s fucked you, but your eyes are carved out. Blank spots instead of the windows to your soul, like everyone always seems to chatter about.

Sure, he remembers the shape of your eyes, and if he takes deep breaths, cancels out Johnny’s blabber blaring from his cot, and enters a deep meditative state, he might be able to draw their outline.

But it’s the shade he misses. Are they sapphire, dark, and cryptic? Or frostbite blues. Emerald, maybe. He ponders, but he’s not sure. Brown, like his? Chocolate, with swirling hazels like golden speckles. Stormy grey. Charcoal black. Amber. Gold. Fucking crimson.

He doesn’t know.

But it's only been three months since he left.

And it’s been six months since Simon has taken you on his bed and fucked his name into you. Six months since he’s finally tasted your skin and imprinted your flavor on his tongue.

It’s your fault, he thinks, if now everything he eats tastes bland. Nothing sweeter than the salt of you. The dichotomy is not lost on him. He’s a rational man, and figures easily that skin can't be sweet, especially not after he made you sweat by pounding you into the mattress. Yet he might have lost a marble or two after that, because now not even honey can compare.

Which is why he’s moved his things in your room. Just because it’s bigger, he told you. No other reason, really.

Fucking liar.

But again, you’re as saccharine as you taste. And maybe not as naïve as he thinks. Because ever since that night, six months ago, your hands often intertwine with his own when you guide him to bed – your bed.

And that’s how he found a nightstand full of his things on the side closer to the doorway of the room. There’s the book you’ve lent him and a re-filled plastic bottle of water right next to it, one that he should probably throw away like you constantly tell him. Something about microplastics, but fuck if he knows. Because ever since that night, he’s lost a bit of his logic, a lot more of his sanity: you can speak for hours on end and he wouldn’t hear a damn thing if not for how your voice vibrates against his eardrums, sending tingles down his spine.

Surreptitiously, his things have started to appear in your room. He doesn’t have much, a phew photos of his family are shuffled with your trinkets. Plain, white frames stuffed in between your smiles on pictures you’ve taken with friends.

A frame of his medals, the ones you insisted he kept, nailed to the wall next to your PhD certificate.

Tidy, onyx wardrobe polluted with pinks and greens. Breathable cotton and faux furs. Fuzzy fabrics that leave a rainbow of synthetic hairs on his clothes. He doesn’t bother to pluck them off, it’s just another piece of you he’s lucky to carry around.

His old bedroom turns into a storage room. Filled with boxes of forgotten things and broken appliances you can’t be bothered to fix.

And he promises to tinker a little with the vacuum, so you won’t have to spend money on a new one and use your savings for your guilty pleasures. That book you saw when you went out together for groceries? Consider it yours. The cooking classes you wanted to attend at that restaurant you’re always raging about? He’s already bought you a pristine new apron.

And maybe he’ll take you there, too. Ask for a more secluded table where he can still spot the door, so he can also uncoil the muscles of his back and use his eyes only to look at you, instead of having them dart around for dangers.

But fuck, he can’t do any of that now.

It’s his first mission after that night, six months ago, and Simon is already feeling withdrawal symptoms. You’re worse than morphine on a dying man; you leave him aching for something he knows he can have because you're so obviously there, but he’s so stupidly far away.

And he can’t even tell you where he is. Can’t even give you some peace of mind. Can barely call you, because Johnny’s been hogging the satellite phone to talk to Lord-knows-who.

The Scot is not selfish, Simon knows he would only have to ask, and the bulky device would practically materialize in his hand. But Simon also knows that if he dared, he wouldn’t hear the end of it. Because in the years spent in the task force, he’s never needed to call anyone.

Can’t call the dead, now, can you?

And now, popping a question like that would only raise suspicions. It would have his mates up his arse until his head would split in half.

But it’s been six months since that night. Three months since he left.

And that pocket of time he’s managed to spend with you, uninterrupted, almost made him accustomed to civilian life. To the lack of his mask and the AC of the flat breezing against his face. The taste of homecooked meals. The constant presence of another soul (a beautiful one at that) in his same space.

With you, he’s never parched – of anything. You feed him mind, heart and body, showering him with that innocent love you so easily dispense, allowing him to bathe in it.

He’d listen to your never-ending chat for days. His mind has always roared with sounds, yet the more noise you make the more you silence it. Baffling, really, how he’s spent his whole life looking for quiet and found it in the loudest person on earth.

He’s always sated with your kisses, your words, your quick mind and razor-sharp wit, your moans and your mewls, and God, anything you were willing to give. Your lips, your spit, the juices he makes you drip, and the ones he makes you spray. He dreams of cupping your clit with his mouth as he ravages your cunt with two thick fingers until you’re splashing on his tongue. He’d drink you dry, if you’d let him.

And oh, you have.

There’s the wonderful catch. These are not wishes; these are memories. Too real and fresh ones for them to be just another one of his daydreams.

Finally, after three months of pondering – or better, yearning – he realizes that every skin-prickling migraine his mates would induce is worth the sweet, sweet sound of your voice.

He’s disgustingly sweaty. He tugs at the lip of his collar and grimaces when he feels the cotton unstick from the dampness on his chest.

Johnny's sitting idly, enjoying the few days of break from mayhem. Just a handful of hours allowed, really, enough to get them back on their feet – tactical planning, refill of their resources. Boring shite like that. But at least it’s a breather all right.

“Got the phone, Johnny?” He grumbles.

And Johnny would love to act as none the wiser, but his eyes peek from behind the sketchbook he holds in his hand. The smirk that curls at his lips has Simon roll his eyes.

He makes a beckoning gesture with his fingers, giving him a pointed look. “Johnny.”

“L.T.” He responds in kind. “Callin’ the landlord?”

Simon levels him with a deadpan look that could freeze the desert they’re stuck in. “Sergeant.”

Bastard’s too cunning for his own good.

Johnny drops the sketchbook immediately, showing the lieutenant his palms in defense. The cheeky bastard that he is doesn’t manage to conceal the absolute fascination in his eyes. He’s studying his superior as if he’s staring at another species.

And Simon doesn’t blame him. He’s like a sock that’s been turned inside out, the negative image of himself. All that gloomy energy turned blinding light, ever since he’s had a taste of what life could be with you in it.

But alas, no one wants to have the Ghost up their arse, so Johnny looks around the messy area around his cot and plucks the girthy satellite phone out of it.

Simon picks it up by pinching the tiny antenna on its side. It prompts Johnny’s smirk to broaden.

“Haven’t done anythin’ with it.” He quips, letting it hang in the air for a second longer. “Or have I.”

Simon grunts a noise of disgust. “Spare me.”

He finds a secluded spot in the area they're occupying. There's nothing around them but the rubble of a city that has been torn by war and time. The sight is dour, and the silence echoes a dark past he hasn’t witnessed. Even so, the remains of the buildings are tall enough to offer their lot some cover.

He slides with his back against a wall, knees spread wide.

He knows your number by heart, his thumb presses each button with newfound resolve. Only when he brings the phone to his ear, does his determination falter. Because he hasn't contacted you in any way, shape, or form for three months. So, what if you’re livid, now? You’d have every right. He’d understand if you’d rip him a new one through the receiver. He just hopes you didn’t spend these days rethinking your choices.

God, you’ve infected him with this overthinking bullshit.

“Hello?” Your voice breaks through the fog in his brain, like a hand wiping mist from glass, and his own breath threatens to choke him. He’s speechless for a moment, forgetting how to function properly.

Just your voice has sent his mind into overdrive - burnt his synapses to ashes.

He reckons he’s completely fucked.

“Hello?” You repeat, sounding a little more annoyed.

You grumble something about telemarketers having lost the decency to call at a reasonable hour. And when he doesn't answer again, he hears you sigh. Your voice gets all clinical, then, as if you were trained to repeat the same script over and over. “Listen, if you’re trying to sell me somethin’, my husband’s not home – he takes care of that stuff.”

He snorts.

“Your husband?”

Silence.

There’s a sort of shifting sound, he gathers you might have removed the phone from your ear and checked for the number on the screen. He can practically see your eyes squinting at the phone.

He hears you gasp, and he hints at a smile. Fucking hell, he doesn’t remember the last time he’s done that.

“Simon?” You venture.

“Hello, love.”

You squeal, and he pulls the phone away from his ear with a grimace. But he’s tired of lying to himself – his heart is soaring.

"Christ. Made my ears ring," he deadpans.

You chuckle, sighing afterward, as if a weight has been lifted from your chest. God, you’re a dream to listen to. If only he could also look at your face right now, just bask in the way your smile would light up the room.

“Serves you right,” you chide him, as if that could ever be a punishment. “Could’ve called a little earlier than three months in. Was already looking for a new flatmate.”

He’s eternally thankful for the skull mask, even if it’s soddened with his sweat because if anyone were to walk by, they wouldn’t see how his face has softened.

“Yeah?” He sniffs, “Made a new flyer and all tha’?”

“Oh yeah,” You agree flippantly. There’s a shuffling sound that reminds him of bedsheets. “Made sure to add my boyfriend left me as a footnote.”

The corners of his lips twitch minutely.

“Thought it was your husband who wasn’t home.” He retorts. “Got a stash of ‘em, then?”

Your chuckle is a breath of fresh air. He wants to have it imprinted in his eardrums, replacing the aggravating tinnitus.

“Oh, y’know,” you sigh dramatically. “Bit o’ this, bit o’ that. Keeps things interesting.”

“Gotta have a chat with the lad, then.” He taunts, “Set some rules.”

“Good luck with that. He rarely listens.”

He hums fondly. It’s all he can give you, right now.

He’s new to this, relationships have never been his forte. For the first time in his life, he’s having someone else guide him. It’s hard, he won’t deny it, having another set of hands grasp the wheel, instead of his own. But he’s letting you, however slowly. You’re understanding, and you’re allowing him to leave his foot on the brakes. You never push him, you go at his pace – even if it’s blatantly annoying, how sluggish his movements are. Yet you don’t seem to mind, and he’s eternally grateful for it.

“How…” You start. He can tell you’re unsure, whether or not you can ask these things. Whether or not he can answer them. “How are you?”

His eyes soften.

“Good,” he reassures you. “’S hot.”

You hum. “North Africa.”

He clicks his tongue. “No.”

“Okay.” A beat. “Middle East?”

Eh. “No.”

You gasp.

“You’re throwing me off guard, aren’t you? You said it’s hot, but it actually isn’t.” You say cleverly, even if you’re aware it’s most likely untrue. “North America, then. Like - Canada.”

“Drop it, maybe.” He offers gently. “Making a fool o’ yourself.”

“Alaska.”

“Love.” He warns, but his voice is kind. “Wastin’ time.”

“Mh, the script has changed, I see.” You tease him, and he can tell you’re smiling, by the way your voice comes. “Thought you were gonna hit me with the classified.”

“Like to keep you on your toes.”

“Been on my toes for three months.”

His heart clenches a little. He doesn’t want that. Doesn’t want you to live on the line like that. He wonders if you’ve ever felt like this, in the four years he’s lived with you without having anything tethering each other, if not a casual friendship. Were you ever afraid when he left for his deployments? Or is this new to you, like it is for him?

“Fixed the vacuum, by the way.” You tell him lightly, as if sensing the tense air your comment has instilled.

He silently thanks you for breaking the silence when he couldn’t. A gentle huff of relief travels through the receiver.

“What was the problem?” He asks, even if not really fussed about the state of the thing.

“Fuck if I know.” You shrug. “Gave it a few whacks and it started working again.”

He fails to keep in a huff of laughter. “Fucking hell, ‘s tha’ what you’ve been doing, then? Hitting appliances?”

“Fixing appliances.” You correct him. “And stress baking. Lots of it.”

“Work’s botherin’ ya?”

“S’fine.” You sigh sweetly, as though that could give him some peace of mind. “Everything’s fine over here, you don’t have to worry.”

Selfless angel, you are. He would have to be daft not to realize that you’re probably leeching your heart dry at the thought that something might happen to him. He feels like a fool for not having contacted you sooner, even when he had only a minute to spare.

His pride be damned.

“’M sorry I didn’t call earlier.” He apologizes, because the least he can do is hope you forgive him for being like a baby deer on ice about all this.

“You called.” Your voice is soft. “’S what matters.”

He knows what you mean. He’s alive, that’s what matters. He’s faring good enough to chat with you, that’s what matters. He’s missing you as much as you’re longing for him, that’s what matters.

He leans forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. His offhand runs across his face and he has to rip his own head out of his arse before the thoughts overwhelm him.

How can he put you through this? He should’ve left three weeks in, four years ago; should’ve let you share your home with someone more reliable, one who didn’t have a blade oscillating above his neck.

And yet at the same time, he can't let go of you.

You’re so good to him, you’re the drop of water in a life that’s always felt arid. You made his barren heart flourish without even trying – he didn’t think anyone could, he thought he was bound to be frozen soil, not a garden. But here you fucking are, with your tiny watering can, nourishing the earth and causing it to sprout.

He’s selfish. He is. There is no karmic balance in his reasons. The scale tips in his favor through and through, because he’s sure you’re not gaining anything from this relationship, if not a spike in anxiety and its hand around your neck.

“How long?” You ask, seemingly unable to bear the silence.

"Few weeks." He croaks and clears his throat when he notices how cracked his voice sounds. “Be back in three. Could be two, if things go to plan.”

The silence on your end is deafening. Unwittingly giving him a taste of his own medicine.

“Countdown starts, then.” You reply with that sunshine in your voice. Sunbeams through ominous clouds. “Gonna tally the days on the wall with one of your can openers.”

He snorts. “Lotta money to fix.”

“We can put ugly wallpaper over it,” you propose. “So the next person to rent the place will remove it and a whole kidnapping slash ghost story will spread around the neighborhood.”

You’re crazy, he thinks, but not unkindly. His heart squeezes in his chest.

“Fucking numpty.”

“Fucking numpty, or fucking numpty, derogative?”

He smirks. “Former.”

“Wonderful.” You say with a pinch of a smile he can’t see, sounding all smug.

However, nothing nice can last forever, not in Simon Riley’s plane of existence. He spots his captain approaching him, fiddling with the boonie hat in his grasp while his other hand lazily dries droplets of sweat on his forehead.

“Gotta go.” He mutters. Waits a bit. Shuffles through his thoughts and decides to swallow his pride, because you deserve at least that much. “Missed you. Still do.”

You're silent for a moment longer before you give him a last glimpse of your voice. The one he'll hold onto like a lifeline for the next three – hopefully two – weeks.

“Miss you too.” You say gently. “Come home soon.”

And he’s back suddenly.

Earlier than expected, at that – one week only. Price was all business, a few days after he caught him sneaking a phone call. Telling him things like “Need you at HQ. Work with Laswell, make sure classified intel stays classified”. And when he questioned why would he send his sniper and lieutenant to do a job an analyst should do, Price answered with a curt “Because I can trust you”.

Honestly, what could he have said to that? Even if it smelled fishy from afar, his reasoning sounded mostly reliable. Because you would send your most trusted to deal with sensitive information, right? And if Simon were a bit more daft and a bit less intuitive, he would've shrugged it off.

But it was plain as day when his boot landed on British soil, duffel bag in hand. When his phone pinged after he turned off airplane mode, and a text popped up:

[Unknown number]: Take a few days off for the jet lag.

That he realized the ploy his teammates had concocted. To be honest, he wasn’t as resentful as he thought he was going to be. There was lingering thankfulness – somewhere, deep below layers and layers of stoicism.

[You]: Time zones aren’t that different.

[Unknown number]: Take a few days off to just rest, then.

[You]: Not that tired.

[Unknown number]: Never took you for one to question orders.

[You]: Never took you for one to put personal life before our job.

Simon waited patiently under the overhanging lip of the hangar. The Kevlar of his glove crinkled as his fingers curled around the hand of his duffle bag. The rain creates a gentle buzz against the metal.

It took a while for the other bubble to appear, as if the other person – most likely Price, judging by the vocabulary used in the texts – was thinking about the right thing to say.

And the right thing it was, when the words fluttered on Simon’s phone screen.

[Unknown number]: About time you put yours first, though.

Simon, for once, agreed.

────────────

The keys slide into the keyhole with familiarity. He turns it three times, content to see you’ve locked the door all the way. When he steps in, the flat is quiet, but he isn’t expecting otherwise. It’s late at night, the hands of the clock that’s hanging above the telly mark somewhere around three in the morning, but it’s too dark to be sure.

He's ever so gentle when he closes the door and gingerly sets the duffle bag at his feet.

The first thought popping in his head it’s you. You’re not expecting him to be back so soon, and he has this trepidation in him that wants to command his feet to the door of your bedroom only to see how you’d react to his unexpected presence.

But he takes a moment to digest this new feeling.

It's hard to realize that, finally, you're not dreading something. For the first time in an excruciatingly long while, Simon isn't afraid. While his brain is rigidly wired in a way that makes him refuse to acknowledge his vulnerabilities, the heart knows best.

And he is scared. He’s always been scared, ever since his mother granted him the possibility of walking this earth. Being excited to live has never been his strong suit, but he’s learning. He’s trying.

Takes practice, to accept you’re worth your happiness.

So, as a novice learner, it’s a little jarring to realize that when his feet land on the hardwood floors of this house, there's no need for fear. He can tuck the dread away, stuff it in a pocket, and close the flap, all the while being sure no harm will come his way. Certainty that with you there’s no need for all that, for vigilance – he can unravel the knots, and simply feel what comes, because it's not going to hurt him.

You could never.

Hooking a finger under the hem of the balaclava, he snatches it off his head and lays it on the shelf next to the doorway. It’s soaked in rain, but he’ll wash it tomorrow. And he’ll use your fabric softener, so it’ll smell like your sheets.

The flat looks awfully dull with the lights off. The bright colors are mere shades of grey, and while he’ll never admit it out loud, he truly thinks the orange of the eastern wall brightens the room as you've told him. The thought itself baffles him – Simon Riley now knows a thing or two about home design. You’ve changed him in ways he never expected.

However, the thing that shocks him even more than his newfound knowledge of home interior embellishments, is when the smell of baked goods bullies its way into his nose. His mouth waters in a Pavlovian response.

Right.

Stress baking.

He kneels to unlace his boots, before toeing them off gently, making sure they won’t thud against the floor and disturb your sleep. Then, he practically floats to the kitchen, still unbelieving at the idea that he gets to come home and find delicacies as such ready to eat. Sometimes, in the span of life he decides to call the “Before you”, he’d snatch a few MREs from the stash in base and eat them once back in his flat.

Easy, quick, and edible. Even if they taste like cardboard.

And now he gets to walk into a kitchen that smells like blueberries and buttercream and black tea. He gets to grab a lumpy muffin from the tray on the kitchen island and sink his teeth in its golden and blue fluff. The flavors erupt on his tongue, from the saccharine spongy cake to the sweet tang of the blueberry juice as the fruit bursts under his teeth.

He selfishly hopes your stress baking will last for a few more days.

Nevertheless, while he’d gladly eat the whole tray if it were up to him, there’s something he craves more than a full stomach. And you're currently waiting in the other room, probably tucked under the duvet because the British weather tonight is rigidly cold.

He shrugs off his wind jacket and drapes it over the backrest of a kitchen chair. He can’t afford to take any steps backward. The coat rack is just a few paces back from the kitchen, nailed to the wall near the entrance, but he really doesn’t care. That handful of seconds is too precious to waste.

The steps he takes through the dark hallway are measured and silent; years of special forces training have taught a man his size how to be what his callsign implies.

Discreetly, he turns the knob, trying to make sure he won’t wake you with a startle because the door has barged open. However, the one caught by surprise it’s him. Because you’re not asleep, even if it’s three in the morning.

Oh, he wants to give you a proper earful – sure, he's not your father, and if you're so keen on staying awake up until this hour on a weekday, then it's your funeral.

Does it help school the unruly necessity of keeping you as healthy as can be? Absolutely fucking not. You’re a heathen and he hates you for it.

But now you’re resting your back against the headboard, cross-legged on the bed. Satin blue navy camisole paired with matching shorts, big headphones on your ears, and your laptop on the mattress. You’re typing away. He’s sure you’ve pushed back an assignment from work and now you’re running out of time.

The room is dark, the only light being the screen of your computer casting your silhouette against the wall behind you. It’s silent aside from the patter of rain on the windowpane – you haven’t closed the blinds because Simon knows you love the moon flooding your room with gentle light. However, tonight the clouds are dominating the night sky, but the lampposts across the street are doing what the moon can’t, and you seem to favor that over complete darkness.

It’s clear you haven’t noticed him yet, music blaring in your ears and eyes focused on the monitor. But he’s seen you all right. And your eyes are cast downward, your lashes like annoying curtains depriving him of what he's been missing for the past three months.

In spite of how muffled his movements have been, you seem to notice a shift in the air. Something that makes your skin prickle, a pair of eyes that shouldn’t be in the same room, nor in the same flat – not now, at least, when he should be mummified in Kevlar and breathable cotton somewhere in the desert. He's secretly proud of how easily you seem to feel fluctuations in the environment. Makes him take a breath of relief, that your reflexes aren't dull even when your senses are already busy.

You lift your head swiftly, and he helps you focus on him by flicking up the light switch. The sudden brightness makes you squint, but you blink it away and finally clock him at the door.

And your eyes are the color of the sun, he thinks. How could he forget, that they’re the color of a bonfire when it's cold out. Of yellows, oranges, and those occasional sparkles of green when the wood is not dry, but still burns to keep him warm.

Realization paints your face with stunning colors: darkening cheeks, eyes shaped like crescent moons under the pressure of rising cheekbones. Mouth curving beautifully, and it seems to catch your teeth. The smile stretches your lips abruptly, morphing your face in spare seconds.

He sees it happen in slow motion. You rip your headphones and carelessly toss them on the bed, your laptop is skewed to the side so quickly that he instinctively reaches out a hand to prevent its fall. Thankfully, the stars are on your side tonight, and the balance tips it on the mattress, instead of the floor.

You’re a little hurricane, scurrying off the bed and kicking off the sheets. Getting on your feet and almost slipping in the attempt to reach him in as little time as possible. A tornado of limbs envelops him in the blink of an eye. He barely has time to react that you’re already coiled around him like ivy– arms, legs, and all.

Luckily, the doorway is right behind him, and he manages to tumble back and lean against it. Your arms are vines around his neck. Your legs are roots encircling his waist. You seem to grow on him, supplying his wretched heart with the sap of life you carry – symbiotic. He feels like he can breathe again and has been doing it wrong all this time.

He helps your balance by keeping a firm hold around your waist with his arms, encapsulating you in his warmth. Lean fingers spread on your back, yearning to touch as much as he can reach.

“Easy,” he rumbles. His voice is hoarse because whatever reaction he'd imagined, all this fussing surely wasn’t it.

Your fingers thread through his hair and tug lightly at his scalp. He’s silently apologetic because it must be wet with both rain and sweat, and he's sure the smell wafting from him isn't exactly cologne-worthy. But you don't seem to care, because after you've thoroughly inspected the crook of his neck, your face comes back into view.

Your eyes are the color of joy.

“Welcome back.” You whisper, as if it’s a secret between you two. And you kiss him because surely you must want it as much as he does. A flutter of lashes brushes his cheekbone when you tilt your head to deepen the kiss. Nails scrape at his scalp in the gentlest of ways.

Simon feels your smile before he sees it. “You taste like blueberries.”

And he exhales against your lips. “Found ‘em waiting for me in the kitchen. Baked for an army, y’ have.”

You peck his lips once more, as if you couldn’t fathom a second longer without having them on yours. “Figured you’d be hungry. MRIs can’t be that tasty.”

"MREs,” he corrects. “And you’re right. They ain’t.”

Simon is not sure he’s ever received such a warm welcome, or such warmth in general. He’s not going to complain, of course, but that doesn't mean it leaves him any less rattled each time.

He gently sets you down at the edge of the mattress, standing between your legs – which you’ve pliantly spread to make room for him.

You gesture with your hand from left to right, "Potato, Po-tah-to."

"One is food, the other is medical equipment," he deadpans.

You glare up at him, as if to ask what the hell he wants now – it's three in the morning. Can’t be arsed to correct vowels at three in the morning.

“Potato.” You enunciate it better now, and it steals a lazy grin from him. “Po-tah-to.”

After having flicked your forehead at your insistence, he reverently lays his hand on your cheek and spreads his fingers into your hair.

“Alright?” You ask him.

“Mhmh,” it’s his only reply.

If only to feel you more, he guides your face to his belly. You seem to appreciate the gesture because you're already nuzzling his shirt, fisting it at his back for good measure. Simon feels your back expand and deflate under his palm when you breathe. Feels the rhythmic thump thump of your heart at his fingertips.

You’re life in its purest form.

Face first into his abdomen, your voice is obviously muffled, but he hears it clearly anyway. "You smell like a sewer, mate."

He snorts, and lightly tugs at your hair, enough to make your head tilt back. He squints his eyes at you. “Cry ‘bout it, mate.”

Simon bends at the waist as you chuckle. Places a kiss on the crown of your head. Your eyes flutter closed and so do his.

For a moment, there’s nothing but you two. The world muffles its noise to favor the sound of your breaths. The rain patters against the windowpane. Your laptop has gone into standby mode so now the screen is dark. The mellow light on the ceiling, a pale yellow, is like your discreet personal spotlight.

Then, he reluctantly pulls away, and you chase him for more, pouting when he doesn’t seem to come back. But when he starts to undress, your scowl is easily replaced by a lazy grin. To increase the dramatics of the moment, you lean back on your elbows and wiggle your brows at him, “Well, well.”

You’re not subtle at all with the way your eyes follow a trail down his back, how the muscles fold when his hand reaches to the collar of his shirt and pulls it off his head. Curves and muscles and the indent of his spine. Skin freckled with scars you never ask a thing about because you're kind and you’re giving him time to open up on his own.

He’s put on some weight ever since your relationship has transitioned into something more meaningful, including feelings he still doesn’t have the guts to acknowledge. His abs are not as defined as before, they’re tucked under a layer of fat he’s not really accepting as of lately. The scar running across his stomach and its other companions only add to his self-deprecating streak.

He eyes you briefly as he unbuckles his belt, searching for what he’s sure is going to be a grimace, but he's met instead with the stupidest look he’s ever witnessed. Slow blinking at his form the more he undresses himself. Lips parted as if you’ve tried and failed to catch your jaw.

And that gives him the right to take those thoughts and shove them into the fear pocket. Sew it shut. No need to fear a thing, if you look at him that way.

You bite the tip of your tongue between your teeth. "Givin' me a show, lieutenant?"

The corner of Simon’s lips tugs upward and the sudden self-hatred sublimates under the warm adoration in your eyes.

“Cheeky little thing,” he rumbles, letting his khakis pool at his ankles. He steps out of them and shrugs them off when they catch his feet.

One last step, and he’s already hooking a finger under the hem of your blue camisole, slowly lifting it up. There's an impish gleam in your eyes that promises trouble and he would love nothing more than to drown in whatever disaster you're planning.

He stands between your legs only in his underwear and after you’ve shut the laptop and placed it on your nightstand, your hands immediately come to rest on his stomach. Simon sighs at the touch.

“You’re a menace,” he says gently when you drum your fingers up to his chest.

Honestly, he hopes you don’t care if he smells like a cocktail of grime and sweat and rain, because, as much as he wishes for a hot shower, the sight of you melts whatever need away.

Your eyes travel downward, taking a generous eyeful of him. However, he knows you’re not just ogling; you're searching him for wounds.

Bandages.

Sutures.

Anything that might tell you whether he's hurt or not.

Obviously, Simon knows you want to ask. But you’re sensible when it comes to his job. In spite of the jabs about all the “Classified” he’s given you as answers, he knows you don’t hold a grudge against him. He also doesn't like to bring work at home, taking pains to leave his safe space untainted by it – instead, he lets you do the detective work yourself.

A sweet sigh leaves your lips when you settle on the fact that he's unscathed, and you lift your arms up to help him take off your top.

"A menace?" You quip, feigning offense. "M’not the one looking naked and yummy."

“You’re about to.”

You don’t look away from his eyes when his fingers pull your top up and off. The camisole is gently removed past your head, the satin leaving your hair a little staticky.

“A menace,” he murmurs once more, his tone softer now as he tosses the garment in a vague direction.

You wrap your arms around his waist, propping your chin on the hollow between his ribs, taking in his face as the sight that it is to your eyes. He doesn’t have the energy to question why, and just basks in the adoring attention and in the well-deserved skin-to-skin contact.

"How was it this time?" You ask gently.

His arm drapes over your shoulders, slowly stroking at your skin. A tender kiss to your hairline has you automatically sighing. You do it every time he kisses your head. He's mentally taken note of how his lips press a button of sorts that makes it all wash away, like suds under the jet of water.

“Same as always,” he murmurs, keeping his tone low and soft for your ears only.

You hum in acknowledgment. "So?"

He smirks, a curve hidden in your hair. “Classified.”

You scoff and playfully slap his butt. He pulls back with a newfound glow in his eyes.

“Not Full Metal Jacket, if you’re wondering.”

You hum, deciding to play along. “Spies involved?”

He snorts and tucks a rogue lock behind your ear. “Sure.”

You poke his chest as you make your definitive guess. “Three days of the condor!”

His eye twitches when, amongst the myriads of films you’ve ever watched in your life, you quote the one with the CIA involved. He has to flatten his face into something more neutral. Surely yours was a clear shot in the dark that somehow hit the right spot – even a broken clock is right, twice a day. Still, your blind guess doesn’t leave him any less distressed.

“Sorta.” He offers through gritted teeth.

And you don’t push any further, sluggishly resting your cheek on his belly.

"Were you more Robert Redford?” You mumble with half-closed eyes, "Or Faye Dunaway?”

Relief washes over him and he can’t help but huff. Plops a hand on top of your head and smooths down to the ends of your locks, rolling them between the pads of his fingers.

“Faye Dunaway, love.” He rumbles. “No question.”

You playfully tighten the hold around his waist, and with a tug, he's pulled down onto the bed. Simon knows he could easily win whichever battle if you’re the opponent, but he’ll always pretend to struggle just to humor you. He’s careful though, so he props himself on his forearms to avoid crushing you with his bulk.

Gently, you kiss his nose but he doesn’t pull away, instead allowing the kiss to be reciprocated on your cheek. He reaches out for the switch next to the headboard and turns off the lights.

Your eyes are the color of a summer’s night.

They’re dark but twinkle with starlight. Pupils blown and the glowing halo of your irises around them like an eclipsed sun. The light coming from outside seems to favor you, creating shapes around your face able to turn you into a dream made reality.

“I’ll call in sick tomorrow.” You tell him, nose to nose.

“Won't bother anyone, will it?” He asks mindfully, although he cares very little if your co-workers might get a little miffed about your last-minute call.

You shake your head softly, causing your noses to brush. “Nope, they’ll understand.”

And so, he unfolds, rolling onto his back and taking you with him. Your head is guided by a big hand to rest on his chest. He fits you perfectly into his side, making sure every piece of you adheres like glue to his skin.

“Y’need a shower?” You murmur in his skin, eyes fluttering closed. Your fingers are tracing mindless patterns on his chest, skimming over hair and the odd scar here and there.

“Tomorrow,” he replies quietly. “Sleep now.”

“Alright,” you whisper. “Wake me up when you do, yeah?”

“Sure.” He says, looking down at the top of your head. He leaves a kiss in its ruffled mess.

“G’night, love.” He breathes.

You murmur it back, and fall into your slumber.

────────────

Simon opens his eyes with his heart thundering in his chest. He doesn’t know why, and likely pegs it to mere habit. Three months stuck in hypervigilance will have your body unconsciously overreact at the most subtle of changes, even if there are none.

There’s too much light in the room for it to be night, and a single look at the window tells him the sun is just shy of rising.

During the night, you must’ve moved around and he must have followed you, because now he has your back to his chest. An arm slung around your waist, the other tucked beneath your neck.

He gently tugs the duvet a little higher, over your shoulder, and spends the next few minutes just looking at how peaceful you look.

Next to a killer.

His stomach churns wildly.

You’re home, his heart says. You’re not a killer here.

A shame, truly, that his brain doesn’t agree in the slightest. Two organs fighting like separate entities, and the whole brawl is happening inside of him, mercilessly tearing his flesh apart.

But it’s already broken, isn’t it? What else is there to shred.

Yet he’s home and you’re comfortable next to him. So how broken can he be, really?

Torn. Shredded. Lookin’ like you went through the grinder and barely came out of it alive.

He forces his eyes shut and buries his face in your hair, nuzzling your nape.

Pretty thing, she is. Who the fuck d’you think you are, mh?

A sharp inhale. Breathing you in. You smell sweet enough for the sounds in his head to buzz out. Not silent yet, but quiet enough for him to have a breather.

You don’t know how long it takes for his body to expel the exorbitant amount of adrenaline produced in three months of deployment. How his back cracks when it hits the comfortable mattress of yours and his bedroom, after having spent way too much time packed like a sardine on sordid cots or much-too-small sleeping bags.

How he fucking hates it, when you feel so soft and untouched, while he has more scars than bloody years on his back.

Not right. Ain’t fucking right to you.

His hand snakes from your waist to follow the curve of your arm. He follows the bulge it makes under the comforter. The rain has turned into a light drizzle, allowing the sound of his skin brushing over yours and the shuffle of the blanket to echo in his ears.

He scoots impossibly closer, pressing your back against his chest hoping your skin would mold with his. Nose buried in the crook of your shoulder; kisses light as breeze following the length of it.

You smell so good you disarm him. He sighs as if he’s been utterly defeated, lost a battle he didn’t even know he was fighting.

His mind hushes, finally. His heart unwinds itself – springs let loose, pulse calm.

There’s you. The way your breaths come. Your limbs stirring at the gooseflesh left by his kisses. The rising sun lapping at your skin. The rise and fall of your back.

It’s calm.

Your head turns slightly, looking over your shoulder. You must only see his eyes, lazily glancing at you through pale lashes.

Yours are a dawning sun.

They’re soft and gentle, pale yellows and blues, peeking above the sheer horizon of sleep you’re trying to overcome. Idle, slow, but most welcome.

“Hey,” you croak, blinking the drowsiness away. “You okay?”

He hums a quiet yeah in your skin. Hasn’t even noticed his hand returning to your stomach and pulling you in, angling you against his lap.

And fuck him, but he’s sporting the hard-on of a lifetime.

He knows you’ll understand that he’s been deprived of such pleasures for three months, but it doesn’t make him any less embarrassed. A hand in his pants, while he hid somewhere more private in the middle of nowhere was a temporary fix that fixed very fucking little. Especially not after having been spoiled by you.

Simon doesn’t necessarily want to fuck you, now. Sure, his dick might have a head of its own, and he wouldn’t complain against it were it to happen, but he still has control of his actions. And now he just wants to feel you, whether inside or out doesn’t matter – as long as it’s you.

Nevertheless, he isn’t expecting you to have much different plans. Naturally, he isn’t going to protest.

Your ass tentatively presses against his length, the satin of your shorts sliding easily along the cotton of his boxers. You’re still so sleepy – he sees you digging a knuckle in your eye, nostrils flaring as you let out a big yawn.

Were you aware of what you were doing, or were you being a goddamn minx?

“Well, good mornin’,” you murmur, a lick of a smile on your lips. “Brought me a souvenir from bumfuck nowhere?”

Minx it is.

He snuffs out a chuckle by harshly pressing his lips against your shoulder, sewing his lips shut. Unfortunately, his chest rumbles against your back and you catch it before he manages to catch himself.

Your hand goes to rest above his own on your stomach, fingers intertwining.

Soft skin on both sides: palm to your belly, knuckles to your hand. He’s sandwiched in bliss. Three months away, barely any contact, and all he apparently needed to alleviate some wounds was just a handful of hours spent asleep in your presence.

His lips part slightly. Kisses turn wetter and teeth bite at your neck, his tongue darting out to subsequently soothe the ache. Your hand has already guided his own to your breast, and your mouth is breathing sounds he’s missed.

And he tells you, because why should he hide a thing from you.

“Missed ya,” he croaks, voice a little shaky for reasons unknown. He could look in his head (or his heart) and find them – surely, they’re there. But he figures the present feels much better than the jumbled mess inside.

Reasons can wait.

“Let me feel you, yeah?”

Your head bending backward to his face is the answer you give him, back pressed flush against his chest. You guide his hand up and squeeze it around the fat of your breast to assert your approval.

But he’s not satisfied with that. Needs your voice to tell him it’s alright, that you’re not under some sleep-induced spell. That you’re fine with having him feel you, and you’re not just offering yourself because he’s been away for so long and you want to give him some sort of reward.

Simply, that you want him as much as he wants you.

His voice is raspy and low, “Words, love.”

"Please," you whisper and vigorously grind your ass against his groin. “Touch me.”

He hisses and presses forward too, meeting your movements.

He’s still a little out of it, senses overrun by the general fatigue clinging to his muscles as the aftermath of deployment, his bones weary and getting accustomed once more to the comfort of a bed instead of a cot.

Mind absolutely quiet.

He flicks his thumb over your nipple. Rolls it between thumb and forefinger. Your shuddering breath prompts him to pull at it, and it causes you to arch your back off of him, pressing further against his painfully hard cock.

He grunts against your shoulder, hand busy teasing your breasts and hips rutting against the plump flesh of your ass. You grind back against him, working in tandem to relieve at least some of that ache.

Each movement is a languid stroke of fabric that gives him enough pleasure to cause his resolve to falter. When he turns your head sideways, leaving your tits to grasp your jaw, he loses it. Your flushed cheeks, lower lip trapped between your teeth, the whites of your eyes still a little red from sleep.

Lips on lips, slotting together like magnets.

Too long.

Too damn long.

Sure, he kissed you when he came back, a bunch of hours before. But this is a whole other thing. The connection behind it, the pinch of your brows conveying the same desperation he has. Hands grabbing at flesh, bodies grinding against each other. Tongues dancing privately. Eyes closed to shut the world out. Moans and pants, dotted with the occasional curse slipping from his lips when the length of his cock catches the cleft of your ass.

His palm slides down and crosses the threshold marked by your shorts. He’s awfully delighted to find out you have nothing underneath them. Feels blessed when his middle finger slides down your cunt to find it impossibly wet.

“Oh - Simon,” He hears you whimper, and he almost comes in his briefs then and there because he has no right to hear you say his sullied name with such devotion behind it.

Seemingly feeling the need to respond in kind, your arm blindly reaches behind, and you slip it between your butt and his groin. Your hand is soft as it palms his cock, the cotton of his boxers an annoying barrier.

The tip is leaking tremendously, and he should be embarrassed about the obvious wet spot he must be sporting on his briefs. However, he can’t even manage to concoct the thought that your fingers are already fumbling with the elastic band of his underwear and finding their way in.

Simon shudders when your warm hand curls around his shaft.

You glide your hand up, collecting precum on your palm, before sliding back down again – velvet skin being pulled over the head to steer clear of overstimulation, and then down once more. Similarly, he crooks his finger to gather your wetness and uses it to roll idle circles around your clit.

And it goes on, and on, and on, and on. It’s slow and drawn out, both of you wanting to reach that high but at the same time don’t – cutting off pleasure doesn’t seem fitting, when both of you have been starved of one another.

He bends the arm beneath your neck to pull your head back, next to his own, cheek to cheek. Simon’s hips jerk to blatantly fuck your fist, yours flow with the movement of his fingers circling your clit, stroking yourself against his hand.

He starts getting antsy, however, when he notices that he can’t properly reach you. Can’t have you unravel on his fingers like he’s done so many times before. Simon wants – needs – to see you unfold and squirm under the pressure of his hand. Needs to have you cream on his fingers – as simple as it’s primal.

He murmurs against the shell of your ear, “Need to stretch you out, love.”

And – goddamn you, you whine. Your hand doesn’t stop its languid movements, but it further slows down, as if you needed all of yourself to cooperate and form a single thought.

“Jus’ do it, I missed you.” You whimper, breathy and high-pitched. “Won’t hurt much, I promise.”

Simon sucks in a sharp breath, closing his eyes because your voice has gone straight to his cock and he needs to disassociate for a second to recollect himself.

You’re a temptress, even in your loving, tender desperation. And how sweet it is to know that he isn’t the only one craving those intimate touches he can only give you. You’ve had your fair share of relationships and lovers, but has he? Some quick ones, enough to get rid of natural aches. Definitely not with a connection so deeply ingrained.

And he tastes, then, the beauty of mutuality. Of giving and receiving.

He retreats his hand and prompts you to do the same. Helps you take off your shorts and pulls his cock out of his underwear. He holds you still with one arm around your waist, palm flat against your lower belly to angle you better.

Gingerly, he guides the tip to your slit, dragging it upward until it catches your clit and you hiss, and then down to your hole. Back and forth, happily realizing that he has, in fact, made you wet enough to make it hurt less. And while he tends to be open to many requests made under the bedsheets, anything that causes you pain is a huge, firm no in his book.

Which is why he’s a bit hesitant now, pressing chaste kisses against your shoulder, trying to soften the ache that will inevitably come. A juxtaposition, really, to his cock dragging a raw, slow dance down your cunt.

It’s then that you turn your head in the pillow to groan against the fabric, and your legs clamp together and essentially choke him between the plush of your thighs.

The sensation is initially a sharp jolt that makes him spout a series of curses under his breath. But then the glisten of your cunt mixed with the precum you’ve diligently smeared all over him, with your folds and your plump thighs wrapped around him in a warm, wet hug – he sees the appeal.

And thrusts. Shamelessly – once, twice, thrice. Snapping harshly, only to draw back slowly. Grunting to your skin. Chest vibrating against your back.

“F – fuck,” he manages to choke out, wringing his eyes closed to regain some control over his actions and failing spectacularly.

Your moans don’t help. They perfectly align with the slap of his hips against your ass, with the wet noises of your sodden cunt against his cock. It’s as filthy as it’s fucking wonderful, and he’s terribly afraid he’ll finish before he can even fit the head inside of you.

The grip he has around your waist only tightens, leaving you breathless by the second. Simon has his mouth next to your ear, giving you the privilege of hearing even the smallest breaths he exhales.

“You’re so fuckin’ soft,” he whispers, panting from the effort.

Curiously, he takes a peek over your shoulder as he fucks your thighs, catching the flushed head of his cock stroking your clit and appearing each time he thrusts in. It’s fucking debauched and he loves it to bits. So much that he groans and rolls his eyes, struggling not to paint your thighs with his spend.

“Need to fuck you,” he hurries, choking on the words. “Now, love.”

Rapidly (and reluctantly), he pulls out of the pillowy, snug space your thighs had inadvertently created for him, almost hissing when the cold air hits the sensitive skin of his cock, coated in yours and his arousal.

“On your back, swee’heart,” he gently guides you down, adding a brisk yet tender “C’mon.”

And you comply, feeling almost like a ragdoll in his hands. Lips parted and slick as they form small Yes’s to convey the same ache he feels. It takes him less than a breath to place his mouth over yours again.

As he hovers above you, thick arms on each side of your head and chapped lips crashing against your own, he slots his hips between your legs. The softer flesh of the inside of your thighs is still wet from when he’s buried his cock between them. He feels the fluids stick to the skin of his hips.

Taking his time, he lets a hand wander down your chest, flowing to your belly until his fingers reach your core – where you’re wet, and warm, and still pressing up against his cock, searching for friction.

He plunges a finger inside, making the movement of your hips stutter and your mouth gasp at the sudden intrusion.

“Gotta stretch you out," he repeats languidly, because he cannot - for the life of him - put words into sentences without thinking about the structure beforehand.

He’s aware he’s big. It used to chub up his ego when he was younger and brash, but now he can’t be arsed about it. Big or small, he’s learned that it’s how you use it – and to be frank, he hasn’t used it much before you.

But he knows it’s going to hurt if he just puts it in with little to no preparation. He hasn’t seen you in three months, and you can trust him when he says he’s as ravenous as you are and can’t bloody wait to be inside you where he’s warm and blessed – but causing you pain? When it can be avoided so easily (and he can make it feel good, too)?

Absolutely not. Categorical.

He wants you to indulge in the blissful touches and the highs he can bring. Needs you to associate him to kindness and soft breaths and how much he hungers for you – he'll gladly eat you up, but only if you say so.

“’S not gonna hurt,” you mumble again, sounding a little drunk in the effort to convince him. “Please.��

Your eyes flutter to him, and they’re this dark pool he can’t seem to navigate. Lust overflowing like fat, miry tears that can’t fit in the space of your sockets, and then something even darker – longing. You’re looking at him as if it's the first time you’re seeing him.

He gets it, then, how good you’ve been at hiding it so he wouldn’t hurt at the thought of hurting you. He must've unconsciously taught you a thing or two, by wearing stoicism, neutrality, and more tangible skull masks.

You’ve missed him body and soul.

You’re there, eyes heavy and full, begging for him to come back to you.

How long have you been waiting for me like this?

“Oh, love,” he breathes and kisses you again.

A long finger inside, pushing against the place he knows makes your eyes water.

“M’sorry,” he whispers, thumb steadfast on your clit, as if he could apologize just by using his fingers because words tend to fail him when he needs them the most.

And so, he slides in his ring finger too, feeling the momentarily tight fit and the subsequent way you relax to welcome him. Your lips part to sharply breathe in, eyes scrunching close at the stretch. He can feel your hands stiffen against his back until they travel up his spine and tangle through shorn blond hair.

You’re keeping him close, with your forehead pressed to his almost to the point of pain. Your noses are in the way of the onslaught you’re causing on his mouth. Strained, heavy pants brush his lips when you part from him to breathe, before lavishing him with attention again.

You’re always good with words. You always know what to say, and yet you’re being extremely quiet – it worries him more than the look you have in your eyes.

“M’sorry.”

For being away.

For not telling you where I was.

For leaving you to wonder whether I’d come back, or not.

For not calling.

I’m sorry.

“M’so sorry.”

My girl.

His hand cradles the back of your head as if he could get you any closer, and he fucks you with his fingers.

“Don’t be,” you reply, your voice so faint and lost in the sounds of your bodies he has to perk his ears for it. “You’re home.”

My sweet, sweet girl.

And he buries his face in your neck, leaving wanton kisses that have very little erotic power to them. He’s just trying to taste you, really. Trying to commit you to memory again, conveying fierce apologies to your skin.

He can feel you clench around him, almost sucking him in, each time his fingers reach deep.

“Fuck, need to see you come.” He murmurs to the skin of your neck.

Thumb aching, he replaces it with the heel of his hand. A continuous and tortuous curl of his fingers inside of you, palm cupping your cunt and rolling against your clit. His cock aches when you whimper and stifle it by biting into his shoulder. A sharp exhale. Skin sweaty and pressed against his chest. Hands tugging at his hair.

“Don’t-” You croak. “Just- just fuck me, Si.”

He groans because stop being stubborn, will ya?

“I’ll cum the moment I get in, swee’heart.” He tries to reason and almost loses it at the raunchy, squelching sounds caused by his fingers between your legs. "Lemme take care of you before tha'."

But it's like talking to a wall.

"'s fine, love. I don't care, yeah?" Your hips move against his hand, but at this point, he gathers it's just a natural body response to pleasure. “You’ll take care of me tomorrow, and the days after that.”

Just when he’s about to rebut, you sandwich an arm between your bodies and curl soft fingers around his cock. The simple act makes him stop his motions, and he feels you pulse and clench around his fingers.

“Please.” You whisper, voice like silk.

He crumbles, then, at the sight of your eyes. Watery and glossy and wide – lust a long-forgotten thing.

He nods briefly when he surrenders. A jerky movement of his jaw as he swallows thickly. Doesn’t dare to avert his gaze from yours when he retrieves his hand and loves to catch how your brows pinch at the sudden emptiness inside. Sloppily, he coats his stiff cock with your wetness with a few weak pumps.

His eyes stay on you, as he goes in blindly, guided by touch only, and drives the tip to your hole. Tries to gauge your thoughts by the expressions on your face, and fails miserably, for once, at keeping his own concealed.

Barely aware and in control of what his face is conveying, he gathers you must appreciate it because you shift your palms to cradle his cheeks. He doesn’t know why you do it because there’s nothing on this godforsaken planet that could make his attention swerve to any thoughts but how beautiful you look when your lips stroke his own with featherlight pressure.

And he slides in, comfortably easy. Feels your puffy lips stretch to welcome him whole, inch by inch. Piece by piece of him, in every way you want to interpret it.

His jaw is locked tight because as soon as your walls envelop the head of his cock, he already feels himself shutting down. His eyes close – he can’t afford to look at how you morph for him. How your pussy swallows the first inches of his cock, puffy clit begging to be touched and lavished. How your mouth parts against his own to yield soft moans and breathy whispers that encourage him to please, please, please go deeper.

He can’t. Stubbornly thinking he must last long enough to give you some pleasure or it will all be worthless. And so, it’s a repetitive dance: an inch in, and a full pull out. Stop. Another inch, and pull out.

It’s driving him fucking mental.

“Let go,” you say, tearing his head out of the gutter. “Look at me, and let go.”

He can’t exactly decide whether you’re being the devil on his shoulder, or an angel sent from heaven – either way, the aim is to ruin him. Yet it doesn’t matter when he opens his eyes, and you look so beautiful his heart cracks, with a thin layer of sweat on your brow and the sheen of his spit on bitten lips.

You don't have to tell him twice at this point, because the way your hands force his face steady so he keeps his eyes on you does most of the trick. His resolve crumbles at breakneck speed.

He bottoms out, pushing his pelvis flush against yours. Your eyes roll back at the same time, legs going stiff and tight around his hips. He does a tentative roll that causes the coarse hair on his groin to press against your bundle of nerves.

"Fuck," you breathe, your voice cracking at the edges. He echoes it right after you, or at the same time – he's not sure, but in his defense, he's not confident about a single thing right now.

If not how absurdly scorching you are, all wrapped around him.

With that, he hooks one arm around your waist and tucks his other hand behind your head. He holds you close like you might slip away, and he’s sure as hell not taking any chances.

He fucks you slowly, deep thrusts that fill you up all the way, and greedy love bites on your neck. Open-mouthed kisses at your throat, sliding up to your jaw and cheeks, all the way to your lips. Truthfully, he’s both trying to get his senses chock full of you, and keep his mouth shut so no words spoken while in ecstasy escape.

The slap of his hips against yours drowns the taps of the morning drizzle against the windowpane. He’s got your face buried in the crook of his neck, and your pants echo in his ears like a fucking promise that threatens to unravel him.

Each thrust has him fully sheathed inside of you. It fills him with primal pride and fuels his pleasure, because you take him so fucking well he can't help but think he's modeled you in his perfect image. He grunts against you and tugs at your hair out of sheer desperation to hold on – just a little longer.

But you’re swearing in his ear. Breathless fuck’s whispered like a curse and a vow at the same time. You shift your hips to change the angle and that makes him hit even deeper and he swears he hears you whimper in that telltale way he knows well.

He lifts your hips up and hooks your legs over his shoulders.

And he absolutely rams into you.

“Christ I missed you.” He rumbles and his voice cracks while your moans rise in pitch and your nails scratch his back. “Fuckin’ thought of you," Thrust. "Every bleedin’ day.”

He’s rambling now, intoxicated on the feeling of you. His words are slurred and strained and, deep down, there’s a more sober version of Simon Riley cursing at himself for speaking his heart out.

Luckily, it’s drowned by the slap of flesh against flesh and the wet sounds of your cunt milking him dry.

Finally, he thinks, he's using his strength not to wield a heavy M4 or to ram against hostiles, but to fuck you on his cock – knee-deep in the mattress for leverage.

He lets go, like you asked.

He murmurs in your ear (Fuckin’ beautiful), words alternated with heavy pants (An’ all mine) and the animalistic grunts of a man cocooned in bliss (All fuckin’ mine).

His hips stutter and he knows he’s close, but you’re not even nearby, in spite of how he can feel you clench around him, sucking him in. And God, the guilt that fills him almost makes him stop even if he has that sweet, sweet release just around the bend.

But you won’t have that, naturally.

Your fingers thread through his hair, clammy and sticking out weirdly because he’s sweaty and hot. He feels his head being shifted to the side, so you can look into his eyes.

And oh, how can you look at him like that? How is he even deserving of it – fuck you and your relentless ways to crawl under his skin and make him feel like he’s worth a damn, with your eyes glossy and hooded. A thick veil of admiration, fondness, and you.

You, you, you.

Where have you been all his life, with this color in your eyes?

“Come inside.” You plead tenderly, breathless and raspy, as he pounds you into your own bed. Your fingers smooth back rogue strands that are sticking to his forehead. “Please come inside.”

And you crush his mouth to yours in a searing kiss. One that marks his demise. He’s falling hard into your embrace, figuratively and literally, too.

He uses whatever shreds of strength he has left to ram into you as if his life depended on it, punching gasp after heaving gasp out of your beautiful lips into his hungry mouth.

It works like a spell because he feels the familiar pressure building at the base of his cock. Syrupy hot warmth runs down his legs to the tips of his toes. Tingling. Tightening. Burning so good he thinks he's melting within you.

Suddenly, his head spins, and he groans in your parted lips as he ruts into you one last time – until he has you filled to the brim. His eyes slam shut as he spills inside of you – cock pulsating and hot.

His high takes its sweet time, canceling out all background noises and only leaving your sweet breaths to fill in his ears, and the pounding of his heart.

Simon unceremoniously drops on you like dead weight, allowing your legs to return around his waist. His lips slide off yours until his head is tucked in the crook of your neck. He’s absolutely spent, but there isn’t enough fatigue in this world that could keep him away from you. You’re sweaty and he’s worse, but he doesn’t see why, in the haze of his orgasm, he shouldn’t have his lips reach every inch of skin he can.

His kisses are lazy – a stark contrast from the desperation he’s displayed until now.

He feels safe. He feels at home, still buried deep inside of you, feeling the come that couldn’t fit inside ooze out and onto the bedsheets. A bummer to clean, he’ll realize when he’ll get his sanity back.

And he wants to tell you so many things when he feels your hands skimming down his back in a soothing dance. Wants to tell you how you’ve flipped his life, with the ease of tossing a coin – heads and tails. Opposites so striking you should be deemed a witch.

He was in deep fucking shit before you offered your smile. Inching closer and closer to dead-ended alleys and dark, murky thoughts that could only lead to dreadful places.

You gave him something to yearn for, something to miss when he's away, and something to cherish when he's here.

There’s nothing he can do to return the favor but love you in equal measure.

It’s not the first time the word love has come up in his head when his mind was lost in memories of you. And while he’d rather not dwell on it now, while you hold him to your chest as he comes back to his senses, he knows the time will eventually come.

Yet he doesn’t dread it. Not one bit.

Fear pocket sewn shut. Finally.

He lifts his head to look up at you and finds you doing the same – he’s sure he’s thoroughly fucked in the best way imaginable.

“I’ll take care of everything later,” you say, reading his thoughts. “You okay?”

It takes him a while to respond. Mental gymnastics to reawaken the parts of his brain that are still tingling in the afterglow.

“Never better, love.”

“Sleep?” You offer, as if he isn’t still buried inside of you and effectively crushing you under his weight.

You don’t seem to mind, and so he trusts you and doesn’t either.

His eyes are half closed as he slides down to rest his head in the valley of your breasts. "Y' didn't cum," he mumbles, leaving an open mouthed kiss on the fat of your tits.

Your fingers brush through his hair to keep him close, and when your nails scrape at his scalp he feels gooseflesh rise along his arms.

"'S fine," you whisper gently, and he's struck by the earnestness in your tone. But then you quip, "I'll have ya on your knees tomorrow."

And he scoffs. "Makin' it sound like a punishment."

You purse your lips and land a kiss on the crown of his head. "Then stop complaining."

He grunts something he himself can't even discern.

“Y’need to piss first.” He grumbles mindlessly, as if the thought of you standing up annoys him but he knows a UTI is even more aggravating.

You snort. “Charming."

And he responds in kind. "Chivalry's dead anyway."

There's a few seconds of silence only broken by your quiet chuckle. "I’ll wait for you to fall asleep, then ‘m off to the loo. Deal?”

He grunts in agreement, liking the compromise you’re offering. “Deal.”

And his head stays quiet. Sleazy hands and raging voices cease, silenced under the thunder of your heartbeat.

“I missed you.” He thinks he hears you whisper, your voice thick and wet. He closes his eyes with his head on your chest. “’M so happy you’re home.”

────────────

Simon wakes up with shy sunbeams peeking through the blinds and brushing his brow. You must’ve closed them when you woke up, to shield him from the sun.

He blinks idly, momentarily lost in that phase between sleep and waking life, still unsure of where he is. His mouth is pasty, and his eyes struggle against sunlight. The duvet is up to his chin, and it smells of grapefruit-scented softener, and of you. The pillow is a little wet, and he embarrassingly notices that it’s because he’s drooled on it – he smacks his lips once, twice, but his tongue might as well be a dried-up cinderblock.

It has been a long time since he’s slept like this. Since his mind has shut down and left him alone. Since his night has gone smoothly, sleep comatose and dreamless – nightmare-less.

And you’re not there, but that’s okay.

Because he hears your music from the kitchen, kept at a low volume so you won’t wake him up. The clanking of utensils frames the beat, pans and pots being moved around as you hum to yourself following the melody. The smell of eggs, sausages, potatoes, and fresh veggies – a full English. Wafts of that disgusting coffee you drink in the morning intertwined with the softer notes of the tea you’re brewing for him.

You were right: he is home.

And he can’t see your eyes, but that’s okay too.

He guesses he’ll never remember their exact shade, Simon’s fine with it. No better thing than to discover you once more, each time he gets to come home.

They change with you, following the flow of whatever you allow to show, and of what he’s learned to read. They’re the color of that life he’s unwittingly always looked for. That life promising a pocket of peace for himself. Chock full of love and nice things he’s always been deprived of.

A balm to both his ancient and newest wounds.

He has never shared a single story about his past, never told you why his body is like a tattered book whose tale is as horrific as it looks. But you don’t mind, and he doesn’t know why because he’s firmly set on the idea that you must know someone inside out to be sure you care.

And it’s then that it hits him, that you do know him – better than anyone. You know the man he is. You want the man he is now, the man he will be one day – as mental as it sounds to him. His present, and his future. And sure, his past might have made this man you know, but he’s not the same Simon under his father's thumb or the one felled by Roba’s tortures.

Although he’s not sure he can reopen certain sutures without the wounds bleeding all over the floor, he'll try. He’ll clean up, if he must, knowing that you’ll help him have each injury scab over again.

What baffles him is that you’re not saying he has to. You’re saying he can. And this choice you’re giving him is a privilege he’s never had the chance to bear.

He can tell you everything, and you’ll listen. He can keep it to himself, and you’ll stay, accepting that there will be places of him you’ll never venture – and to you, that is fine.

As long as he stays, too.

There are no words he can use to express his gratitude. He can only love you – and it might take him a while to acknowledge that he’s capable, but he already does love you.

You appear at the door as he’s lost in his own head, still tucked under the duvet. Strips of sunlight cross your form, curving around the beautiful shape of you.

“Good morning, you.” You say, with a smile that reminds him of the sun.

Lazily, he offers one of his own to you. It’s lopsided and he thinks not quite as beautiful.

He hopes you forgive him for it: takes practice to be happy, and he’s still learning.

And so, he smiles, and looks at you like you're the most tangible form of joy he's ever witnessed.

His voice is raspy from sleep, and soft from you.

“Mornin’, love.”

#simon riley #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #call of duty modern warfare #cod #cod mw2 #fanfic #archive of our own #ao3 #ghost x reader #soft simon riley #cod smut #smut #foxy

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borathae · 1 year ago

Text

"Jungkook is always plagued with guilt when he has to leave you for a business trip. His anxiety that you might be angry at him for not being present is especially high this time around and only your safe embrace can help him calm down."

Pairing: CEO!Jungkook x f.Reader

Genre: married life!AU, mild Hurt & Comfort, Smut

Warnings: Jungkook is anxious, stressed & guilty, he cries, she is so comforting, hugs and kisses, needy sex, sloppy mutual masturbation, handjob, pussy fingering, penetrative sex facing each other, until he pushes her to her back and fucks her missionary, strength & muscle kink, he is so passionate and rough in missionary, I don't think that there are distinctive roles in this, I guess you can call it Top!Jungkook with a Mommy kink, she calls him Bunny at first before he fucks her to the state where she can only call him by his name, dirty talk, sensory deprivation in the sense that they fuck in complete darkness, they're so so desperate for each other, tears because it's so good, multiple orgasms for her, creampies, cockwarming as aftercare, with cuddles and kisses <3, they're fucking soulmates

Wordcount: 5.3k

a/n: i wrote this after kook's solo concert because he did it to me. i also reread THE angst chapter of aaol and i think this influenced me as well. i really want my kookie back

The plane wasn’t supposed to land this late. The plans were all ruined.

Jungkook scans his eyes over the kitchen. Empty. Clean. He abandons his suitcase by the stairs leading up and walks to the fridge. He opens it. His heart stings. The plans were all ruined. He wasn’t supposed to come home this late. You made dinner for him. The prettily plated food is still on its original plate for him. You put a glass bowl over it to keep it fresh.

“Fuck”, Jungkook presses out and closes the fridge. He feels so fucking guilty that he wants to throw up. He should have been there. He should have eaten your food and talked to you during dinner. He should have fucking been there.

You knew that he wouldn’t come home. He was aware that his text came way too late, but he still had hoped that you hadn’t started cooking yet. Of course you had.

It has been longer than a month since he last was in Seoul and you always cook the grandest things as a welcome home surprise. Jungkook doesn’t expect you to cook, you do it because you want to. Which makes him feel all the shittier right now. He wasn’t there to appreciate it. He had one job - the most important job of all - and he fucking failed you.

Jungkook walks back to his suitcase and lifts it. He will carry it upstairs and then do the laundry tomorrow. He can’t be bothered tonight. It’s already too late. He already wasted too much time being his shitty CEO self.

The dressing room is empty and clean. It faintly smells like lavender in here. He knows it’s because you cleaned this room recently. Jungkook discards the suitcase by the dresser and leaves the room.

He takes a shower in the upstairs bathroom. He didn’t want to go downstairs yet. He is a little scared to do so. He shouldn’t have arrived so late. He is scared of your reaction. He gets so sad when you are disappointed in him. He hasn’t decided yet whether it’s his anxiety disorder talking or the truth, but he thinks that you will be angry at him.

He is angry at himself. He’s a fucking shithead of a husband. That’s what he fucking is.

Jungkook manages not to cry in the shower even if he really wanted to. His feelings are eating him up alive. He feels so stressed. So tired. So exhausted. Work has been hell. And the fact that it was in a country he barely knew the language of and he had to be without you made it even worse. He feels so drained.

The shower doesn’t help. It cleans him, nothing more. Jungkook doesn’t put on clothes and leaves for downstairs. He uses the never ending city lights as his guidance. The wind carries the distant purring of the traffic to the windows. The slightly higher pitched pitter patter of his naked feet on marble floor is loud in comparison. The sound stops in sync with Jungkook stopping in front of the bedroom door.

His hand is shaking. He has to hold it to calm down. He is so scared. You will be so disappointed with him. He wouldn’t even be surprised if you told him to sleep on the couch tonight. You never did so before, but things can change. One month is awfully long and he left you hanging today. He wouldn’t blame you if you sent him away.

Jungkook takes a shaky breath for courage and steps inside. The room smells like home. Jungkook feels his throat tighten in emotion. This is what home smells like. And he was too late for it. He swallows down his tears and tries to walk it off.

The electric blinds are closed all the way, putting the room into complete darkness. Jungkook uses the light of his phone screen to tiptoe to the bathroom. He still needs to brush his teeth. He does so using his phone’s flashlight as the only light source. He didn’t want to turn on the big lights and risk waking you. Or maybe he didn’t want to look into his own eyes. He can’t bear to face himself tonight.

Jungkook leaves the bathroom door open and tiptoes to the bed. His phone screen gives off enough light that he can see you once he arrives by the bedside.

You are turned to his side, resting your hand on his blanket. Your cheek is squished as you are sleeping halfway on your stomach. Your lips are parted as soft breaths leave you. Jungkook looks back at your hand resting on his side and gulps down the painful lump in his throat. You shouldn’t have had to fall asleep alone tonight. You shouldn’t have had only his memory to hold.

Jungkook picks up your hand so he could slip under the covers. You react to the gentle nudge with a hum.

“Mhm”, you let out and roll over, now showing off your back.

Jungkook is aware that you didn’t do it on purpose, but it feels like it. You turned your back to him and it’s his own fault.

Jungkook tugs the blanket under his arm and touches your back. Up and down. Up and down. He feels you breathe. Your warmth is so familiar to him. He missed it so much.

He missed you so much.

His eyes start burning.

“I’m sorry”, he whispers shakily and turns his back to you. He can’t face you anymore. It hurts so much. He squeezes his eyes shut and tries not to cry.

The sheets ruffle as you move around again. Jungkook doesn’t feel the movement because you and he have separate mattresses and separate blankets to get the best sleep ever. You shared a mattress and blanket at first, but decided to upgrade your bed a year ago. Jungkook likes his mattress firm and his blanket thin, while you love to have a softer mattress and your blanket to be thick. And the little mattress movements as one of you rolled around or the blanket wars which once managed to wake you are gone as well. Changing one mattress and blanket for two was the best decision ever. You and he sleep like royalty these days.

Jungkook hears the sheets ruffle as you move around and then the sound of a hand sliding over soft sheets. Warmth touches his back. He tenses up, stays silent. You draw paths along his back, feeling him up. Seeing him. Just like he did all those years ago when you were still masked soulmates aching to be together. It became a little thing between you and him to trace the other in darkness as to make out if it was your other half. You became so good at it these days.

Your touch dances up to the nape of his neck after exploring his upper back. Jungkook shivers and aches to lean into your touch. He is scared to do so now. He already waited for too long to speak up. You’ll know that he is intentionally acting asleep to avoid talking to you.

You close the distance, taking him into your arms to pull him against your chest. You are propped up on your elbow, using the position to nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck so you could kiss him.

Jungkook exhales shakily, releasing all of his tension with a tremble. This just broke him. To be cradled and kissed. It broke him.

“Are you awake?” you whisper softly. The words swirl against his neck.

He nods his head.

“Sorry, did I wake you?”

He hesitates. Should he be truthful? Will you be hurt if he was?

He shakes his head. He can’t lie to you. Not like this. Not when you hold him so safely. Not when you have broken him with your embrace.

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“I’m sorry”, he presses out and sobs softly.

“Hey”, you gasp, straightening up, “hey, are you crying? What’s wrong?” you babble and roll him to his back so you could cradle his cheeks. You wipe his tears away, keeping close by resting your chest against his’, ��what’s wrong, Bunny?”

“I’m sorry for tonight. I’m so sorry for being late and, and not showing up. I’m so fucking sorry.”

“It’s okay, hey it’s okay. It wasn’t your fault. The flight was delayed. You couldn’t have known.”

“I saw the food”, he confesses and squeaks sadly, “I didn’t show up, I’m so sorry. I should have texted sooner, I should have-”

“How could you have texted me sooner if you didn’t even know that the flight would be delayed?”

Jungkook falters. He sniffles repeatedly, taking sharp gasps for air to regulate his breathing. What you say makes sense to him. He didn’t even think of it yet, despite it being the most logical explanation. So it was his anxiety disorder kicking in.

You caress his left cheek while your right hand guides your pointer finger up and down along the bridge of his nose. You call this touch your magic touch because there is some sort of magic in it to calm down any sort of anxiety Jungkook experiences. Jungkook flutters his eyes closed and sighs as comfort overtakes him.

“Now tell me how you should have texted me sooner, mhm?” you ask in a soft, comforting voice.

“I don’t know”, Jungkook whispers.

“Of course you don’t, it’s impossible. The flight was delayed. It was an unfortunate series of events and not your fault”, you assure him, “unless you intentionally stayed away. Mhm is that it? Did you not wanna see me already, you sneaky Bunny?” you add in a joking tone, making Jungkook giggle.

He shakes his head, “no Mommy, I wanted to see you.”

“Good”, you say in a fond voice and claim his lips in a smooch.

Jungkook gasps because he hadn’t expected it. The feeling finally seeps into his consciousness. He is kissing you. After thirty three days without you, he is finally kissing you again. Jungkook whimpers and hooks his fingers behind your head, deepening the kiss with trembling lips. He is kissing you again. He is finally realizing that this is happening, that he is back with you. He hooks his arms behind your head and pulls you closer, asking for your taste. You part your lips and meet his begging tongue, while your fingers explore the softness of his hair.

You feel a little dizzy from sleep. You didn’t have the deepest sleep tonight because you knew that Jungkook would come home and you subconsciously refused to find deep sleep. So when Jungkook got into bed, the rustling of his blanket woke you. The pull was instant. You needed to feel him, make sure that he was finally with you again. Your body didn’t expect to be in the current position for such a long time. Your arms are weak and your head is dizzy.

You break the kiss because exhaustion makes you do it.

Jungkook chases you, rolling you and him over so he was the one on top. His right arm rests around you just a little under your breasts, his left hand is cradling your cheek while his right hand is deepening in your hair as best as your texture allows it. He claims your lips in a kiss again, whimpering into it as his body seeks your closeness. Two layers of blanket are keeping you apart. Jungkook doesn’t think, he merely acts and pulls his blanket off of him. Next your blanket. He opens it and slides his arm under it. He takes you softly in his hand and presses you against him at the same time as his body sinks under your blanket. He trembles. It is so warm under your covers and from what he can feel, you are wearing one of his sleep shirts. He grabs a bundle of it and twists, needing you to be so much closer than you already are.

“Please”, he begs in a shaky voice, tugging at your shirt.

You sit up far enough that you can take off your shirt. You throw it to the side and fall back down.

“Thank you”, Jungkook whimpers and cradles you against his chest. He buries his face in the crook of your neck and places his right hand on the back of your head to support it for you.

You wrap your arms around him, letting out a sigh you didn’t even know you were holding in. You have him back. This is how your Jungkook hugs. Thirty three days without him are unbearably long. So long in fact that your skin started to unwillingly forget the warmth and softness of him. It comes rushing back again now that you are hugging without barriers.

“___”, Jungkook croaks and presses you closer, “oh god.”

“I missed you too”, you whisper, burying your hand deep in his hair. You pull him closer. Your breasts squish against his chest, the pressure feels like heaven. It gets easier to breathe and releases you of tension you didn’t even know you possessed. You have your Jungkook back.

Jungkook feels overwhelmed. He ached for your hug ever since he left. Thirty three days without you were hell. You are his constant in his life. When he comes home from work, you are there, hugging him and talking to him and falling asleep with him. When he leaves for work, you are right by his side, talking to him and kissing his cheek as he drops you off at university. When he has free time, he knows he can spend it with you. You are always there. You are his constant. The person who will always be by his side. The warmth he can always return to. So to go without you for more than a month was hell.

“I missed you so much”, he confesses.

“Me too, Bunny. Me too.”

You felt just as lonely without him. Years ago, you wouldn’t have batted an eye at the thought of being along for a month, but Jungkook changed you in the most wonderful of ways. He is your person, the comfort you most look forward to, the home you never want to leave. You have him by your side in the morning and have him back again by the evening. You share the last second of consciousness with him before sleep and share the first right after. And for the last month, you didn’t. You had to live without him and it was agony.

“Closer”, Jungkook begs, “I wanna be closer.”

“Closer?”

“Closer please.”

“Lie down on your side.”

Jungkook obeys, keeping his arms around you. You seek him and slide your hand to his length. You brush your fingers over his tip, eliciting a trembling gasp from him. A small whimper follows.

“This kind of closer?”

“Yes”, he squeaks and grabs whatever he can of your upper back.

“I missed this feeling. You’re so soft.”

“I missed you too. Ah please.”

“Kook…”

“Can I-”

“Yes.”

His left hand naturally dances down your body, trying to locate your clit. You drape your leg around him, giving him access. He connects his fingers with your heat, sending electricity through you.

“Holy fuck, I’m sensitive”, you get out and moan. You take his cock and begin jerking it. He grows hard rapidly. Just as you soak his fingers at a rapid speed. You want him. He wants you. Too long you had to go without each other.

“Me too. Ah mhm”, he gets out and buries two of his fingers inside you.

“Bunny….”

“Mommy…”

You cradle his cheek, rub your thumb over his face and stub his nose with your own. Your hands work desperately between your bodies, the tension is growing embarrassingly fast.

“Bunny, I missed you so much”, you keen and squeeze your eyes shut. It feels so good. His long fingers are filling you up while his thumb is rubbing circles on your clit. He is so sloppy and needy in his touch, which makes it all the better.

“Me too, Mommy”, Jungkook gets out and whimpers, “oh god.”

Your hand is fast around his cock. You are calculated on normal days, but not tonight. There is no coordination in how you touch him, just pure and honest desperation.

“I don’t wanna cum like this”, you croak.

“Close?”

“Yeah, it’s fucking stupid. Fuck”, you slide your hand to his hair so you could twist.

Jungkook moans, tilting his head back all on his own while his pouty lips brush against yours. You kiss without really kissing. Just featherlight touches, tickling moans and traces of your tongues. The tension between you and him becomes unbearable. You clench down on his fingers, feeling his cock throb in your hold.

“Bunny, I need your cock.”

“I need your pussy too, Mommy.”

“Good. Take out your fingers.”

Jungkook obeys, touching your hip instead. Neither of you care about the wet mess he leaves on your skin. It’s just another proof that you and he are finally reconnected again.

“Good boy”, you praise and shimmy down just a little so you can take his cock inside. There is no friction, no struggle, no pain. Just warmth and overwhelming pleasure.

“Holy fuck”, you whisper and push him in deeper. Past your entrance. Your warm walls engulf him.

Jungkook grabs you and accidentally scratches you. He couldn’t help it. He is with you again. No one feels like you. No one does.

“Ah!” the sound bounces off the walls. He trembles and pulls you closer, “Mommy.”

“Bunny.”

“Oh god, I’m home”, he whimpers and starts chasing you.

Your leg is still around him, his thrusts go so deep like this. You are so filled up with him, so stuffed. You are eye to eye even if the complete darkness prevents you from seeing each other. But you don’t need light to see each other. Not you and not Jungkook. You have your hands and fingertips to see. You started it back in the stuffy sex club room you met in and perfected it over the years in your loving home. You know exactly how he looks right now and in return he knows as well.

“Bunny, oh god, my Jungkookie”, you get out and shake, pulling him closer by his hair. The darkness makes it feel all the more intense as you claim his lips in a passionate tongue kiss. The sounds of it mix with the desperate rutting your hips are doing. The rustling of the sheets is audible as well, as are the needy moans both of you choke out constantly.

You are hot under the covers. Sweat has formed on the parts where you are pressed together. You pull each other closer regardless, basking in the heat because you had to live without it for far too long. This is the only way to melt with each other.

“I love you”, Jungkook gets out and kisses you again.

“-love- too”, is all you get out between your hungry kisses, but Jungkook knows regardless. Even without words he would know. From your kisses, your embrace and the way your pussy is convulsing around him. Jungkook knows every ridge, every bump, every inch of how you feel inside and being allowed to experience it right now is the only proof of love he needs. He is the man who you allowed to go in raw, even back when you pretended not to care. You claimed him and sealed his sweetest fate. You loved him enough that you wanted to be without barriers and you love him enough that you welcome him home right now.

“You feel so good”, you moan and rut against him before your lips suck on his lower lip needily.

Jungkook whimpers, spilling tears of ecstasy. He fucks into you, feeling his legs shake. He is so high on you.

This is fucking for the sake of reconnecting. This is emotional. Deeply, soul-consumingly emotional. Is it kinky? No. Will either of you last long? No. Will it stay in your minds as one of the most intense nights ever? Yes. Yes it fucking will. This is the kind of desperate, needy, passionate sex you can only have after you have been without each other for a long time. It is dumb. It is raw. It is carnal and it is the only good thing which comes out of having to be without the other. Because no amount of foreplay, kink or fetish will ever get you to the level of starvation than forced distance does.

And you are starving. Oh, you are parched and aching for each other. Jungkook fucks you as hard as he can, while you rut against him as roughly as you can. It results in these deep, fiery thrusts, which fills you with all his cock and in return makes him experience every inch of your pussy.

You are burning up today. You are hot around him, as if you had a fever. Jungkook can barely breathe because of it, gasping for air between his desperate moaning. And you are soaking wet. Soft too. So soft. Jungkook scratches down your back and pulls you closer. His left hand cups your buttock and stills your hips this way. He pushes. The kiss breaks with your needy moan. You roll to your back just enough that Jungkook can prop himself up on his right elbow and use the angle to finally bottom out. Truly bottom out because the position finally gives him a chance to do so. Your leg is still around him, while the other is under his weight. You can feel his sculpted thigh shift and tense as he fucks you. His thrusts are sloppy and so perfectly uncoordinated that they seem coordinated. The mattress shakes because of it.

You barely feel it because he is currently fucking the senses out of you. This is the kind of fuck which reminds you why he managed to steal your heart and the proof of why you could never want to leave him. It genuinely fucks every sense of control out of you and turns you into the neediest, wettest pillow princess in existence. Tonight it impacts you especially deeply, leaving you to arch your back and curl your toes.

“Bunny”, you moan embarrassingly high pitched, throwing your head back as best as possible while Jungkook shows off the strength of his hips, “Bunny, oh god. Ah Bunny.”

“Mommy. So good, ah Mommy”, Jungkook moans and drops his head into the crook of your neck. He pulls you closer until your head rests on his right lower arm and you have his biceps brushing against your nose. The gentle headlock he has you in heals you from aches you didn’t even possess before. You are so safe like this. He smells hot. As if he is burning up.

“Bunny…”

You are burning up yourself, grasping his broad, muscular back as your only connection to sanity. He is making you cum and it’s happening soon.

“Don’t stop, please”, you beg.

“Mommy”, he moans and continues because he won’t ever ignore one of your begs. You don’t beg often, so when you do, Jungkook is overtaken with the need to fulfill your every wish. Which means a lot because he always wants to fulfill your every wish.

“You’re making me cum”, you choke out and sob softly as you hug him against you.

“Holy fuck”, Jungkook gets out and squeezes you strongly as your body falls into the high. You are so tight around him, burning up and throbbing. No wonder you are sobbing. Jungkook has to grit his teeth from how intense your orgasm feels to him and he isn’t even the one experiencing it. And there is one problem right now. He still needs it longer. He doesn’t know if he is holding back because he is greedy for more or if his body is just working this way right now, but he isn’t done even when you are already coming down. He needs more. He wants you longer.

You are soaking his cock, pulsating around him as you slowly recover and it’s fucking messing with him. He needs you. He needs you so bad.

Jungkook uses his strength and rolls you onto your back completely. His cock leaves you for a second, but you barely feel the disconnection as the darkness and your passed high leave you disoriented. Your legs are spread open, giving Jungkook a chance to take his cock and push it inside again.

Now you feel it. Now you’re whole again. You whimper, tensing up around him.

“Not done yet”, he rasps with his hand twisting the pillow next to your head. He bottoms out and chases you instantly. Fast and hard. He fucks the juices out of you, filling the air with the sounds of it just as he fills it with the sinful sounds of his naked body impacting with yours. The bed is sturdy and yet still croaks. His throaty grunts and guttural growls fill your ears as well. You know for a fact that he is frowning right now, gritting his teeth because he always does so when he fucks hard.

“Ju-Ju-Jungkook”, he fucks his name out of you. He is fucking his cock right against the spots which steal your sanity. You can’t stop getting wetter because of it. Every second with him feels fucking orgasmic, “Jungkook! Ah! Jungkook!”

You grip his arm. His muscles are so tense, bulging under your fingers as he drills you like an animal.

“Jun-Ju-Jungkoo-ook.”

“Yeah, keep moaning my name Mommy”, he growls deeply and curses, “fuck, this is…fuck.”

“Jungkook, ah god Jungkook.”

“That’s it, Mommy. That’s it, keep moaning my name”, he encourages you and rewards you with harsher thrusts. Of course this wasn’t his final form yet. Not Jungkook. Not your husband. He will make you believe that the sex couldn’t get any better before showing you not to underestimate him. He fucks you deep into the mattress just as he fucks you deep into a blurred state of ecstasy.

You are utterly and entirely his right now. And you fucking like it, moaning his name as he rewrites your definition of pleasure one harsh thrust at a time.

“I missed you”, he is using his deep voice to talk, “I thought of you, urgh, of you being mhm being cockstuffed with me, ah mhm I’m going crazy, Mommy. Fuck.”

He could tell you everything right now and you would barely take it in. Your brain doesn’t work. You are so dumb right now. So utterly stupid. If you weren’t on your back, you would have drooled. Instead you sob his name and writhe desperately.

“Fuck”, Jungkook spits and growls. His hips stutter for only a second. This is how long he needs to find his composure again and then he is already drilling you again, pushing your body closer and closer to your orgasms, “have to go again?”

“Ye-yeah”, you keen, arching your back.

“Let go Mommy, I’m right here”, he tells you and cradles your cheek.

The touch is all that was missing. You break apart with a loud moan of his name and your fingers desperately twisting his hair. He fucked it out of you from the deepest parts of you, which makes it all the more intense. You can’t even moan as it happens. His name was all you managed to produce before your voice gave up on you. You can’t breathe either, lying there with your lips parted and your back arched as Jungkook drags heaven out of you.

Your second high gives him a hard time. The needy fucking he did brought him to the point where he has to let go even if he wanted to hold back longer. His cock aches, his balls feel tight and the tension in his stomach has reached a painful level. While your lungs aren’t working right now, his’ are working overtime, producing the neediest, quickest pants for air. He takes a deep breath and exhales it through his mouth, dropping his head into the crook of your neck.

“I’m gonna cum inside”, he moans in a pitched voice. His hips stutter, but don’t lose speed, “gonna creampie your pussy so hard. Holy fuck, Mommy.”

You wrap your legs around him, closing your arms around him as well while your left hand buries itself deep in his hair and your right grabs his tense ass. You are barely present yet, but the need to feel him paint your walls gives you enough strength to pull him close.

“I love you”, he chokes out and lets go. He isn’t silent like you were. He is loud. Oh so loud that after a few seconds he needs to muffle himself by sucking on your neck.

“I love you too”, you whimper, “my loving counterpart.”

“Oh”, he sobs and pulls you closer, “my soulmate”, he squeaks and tenses up again, “no-not done. Ah!”

“Let it all out, fill me up Bunny. Please don’t hold back.”

Jungkook paints you white until it drips out of you and his body’s strength forsakes him. The comedown is intense. Because Jungkook never stopped fucking you even after your high stopped, you never got to calm down and because Jungkook fucked himself to the point of ruin he feels just as needing for your embrace.

“Are you okay?” he whimpers.

“Yeah. You?” you get out.

“Yeah.”

He shivers and twitches on top of you, blanketing you in under his body weight and the real covers. They slipped off his back in the rough fucking so that now, they are only covering your lower bodies. You don’t feel cold because you have him keeping you warm.

Neither you nor him can talk for the first few minutes, sharing forced silence as your brains try to relearn how to speak. His ears are ringing, you can feel your pulse in your head. You are both sweaty, the heat grows in your bodies now that you are so melted together. His cock softens slowly, still filling you up and keeping most of his seed inside. Good. You don’t want him to leave yet.

You finally have him back after more than a month and you would be a fool to break the connection sooner than necessary. You know that sooner or later you will have to stop this. Not only because of your important post-sex pee, but also because Jungkook can’t fall asleep like this.

At least this is what you believe. Jungkook is in the midst of drifting off to sleep. Jetlag, stress and exhaustion are finally catching up with him. Now that his mind is cleared of that initial dulling desire for you, it is finally truly sinking in that he is back home. And being back home means comfort and sleep. Still being inside and having you cockwarm him while your fingers are drawing hearts on his back forces even more sleepiness to the surface. He is home. Sleep can finally come.

“Bunny?” you whisper, scratching up his back gently. Goosebumps follow your touch. He shudders as you drag shivers out of him.

“Hm”, the sound barely wants to leave him. It tickles your neck.

“Are you falling asleep?”

He nods his head slowly.

“Don’t”, you chuckle softly, shaking him by his back gently, “the post sex pee.”

“I’m tired”, he breathes and sighs, “so tired. Work…hell.”

“I know, Bunnybaby I know. But spending your break from it having an UTI is gonna suck.”

“Not yet. Please.”

You give up fighting him, exhaling deeply through your nose. He sounds so needing of what you currently have. You need it as well.

“Fine”, you say and fish for the blanket to pull it over your bodies, “a few more minutes.”

You hug him against you, cradling the back of his head. Jungkook sighs and relaxes on top of you.

“I fucking missed you, Kook.”

“I missed you too.”

2K notes · View notes

cutehoons02 · 6 months ago

Text

˚🕯️Run,ma belle ˚🕯️

*pairing: Vampire Jungwon x human reader (rivals to lovers)

*tags: Blood,bites,fluffy, kiss, teasing, a little smut, horny vampire

* synopsis: The vampire leader may have as his soul mate any human being or something dark will be wedded among the enhypen group.

This first one-shot is formed by Jungwon, with the next chapters you will also discover the other members

* word count: 5k (Tell me if you like this kind of stories:)

—REBLOG if you enjoyed

(English is not my native language)

It had been almost a year since one of the most prestigious mixed universities in the world had granted hospitality to live and study with vampires, wizards, elves, shape-shifters; but there were rules that anyone had to follow. Do not start fights inside the campus, respect any person especially human beings because they have no magical or superhuman power, and do not force love between non-human beings and human beings, You could understand very well if a couple was really in love especially if this was composed of a human being and a hybrid, especially between vampires/ humans. Y/n was accepted in that university because he was brilliant and his dream was to become a journalist on that campus, there were the best courses but also because fate wanted to meet and understand the leader of vampires so that you could fall in love with a human being, As had happened to his parents but with a better fate.

Y/n had been put in a room with a girl with human appearance and was super happy when he saw her for the first time because who entered that university had to pass tests not only related to the subject studied but also on magical creatures and especially you had to pass a defense exam and Y/n was astonished to pass all the phases, For his misfortune or good luck his roommate was a vampire and discovered it in a way as unpleasant but funny; wanted at all costs to try one of the lipsticks because she always had beautiful red lips but when she wore that lipstick she discovered that that lipstick was not artificially colored but with real blood that her roommate loved sucking from another vampire and who loved to show off to the whole campus.

Y/n was not very afraid of vampires because his roommate had tried in every way to get her used to that world and also make them know as many vampires as possible, including the group of his closest friends, were called "enhypen". After all, they had a kind of band and sometimes did concerts especially live on various social platforms and to his amazement were very famous. Still, people who didn’t live on campus thought they were just ordinary students doing funny ballet as a hobby or writing vampire-related pieces. Instead, they were real vampires and the less they were in contact with human people the better, because they seemed to all effects of simple humans but they were not at all, Each of them had special powers and insecurities that they tried not to show but when you think you are a superior creature to humans they could vent at any moment even if they managed to control their powers.

The enhypen was composed of 7 vampires all with different ages except the trio composed by Sunghoon, but the most powerful of all 7 was not the oldest in the group but one of the smallest members, although they were only a few years or months apart all respect Jugwon from the group members to the vampires on campus, all creatures and especially the few humans that populated the student campus. Jungwon loved to make everyone comfortable with his presence and his feline appearance especially the humans, not because he respected him but only for what had been suffered by his mother, She hated to have been conceived by a human being but at the same time, her mother had made her know the life of a human being with all the emotions that could be perceived and have, As a child, he loved being human but when he saw his mother in death he wondered why she had not chosen to turn into a vampire but maybe he knew that he could not love for hundreds of years that vampire who saved her hundreds of years ago, He loved his mother much more than his father but he was turned into a vampire because he wanted to live for hundreds of years but after that transformation, his heart no longer beat for anyone but maybe near there was a person who slowly was making sense Jungwon but he hated her with all his heart.

Y/n was a normal human girl who knew too much about magical creatures and her vampires and his bad luck as if someone on it was making him crazy if she found out without wanting to a lot of lessons that she had chosen to follow that year, his roommate and this thing did not play in his favor and every time he tried to ignore it if he found it in his field of vision, Jungwon did not like it because it was extremely intelligent and many times they also took the same score in tests, This made him angry. After all, he was seriously the most intelligent among all vampires and his power was to memorize everything in a few seconds but Y/ n sometimes passed it in tests.

"Well guys, i would like to propose a little collaboration between you, you know that the job of the journalist is a job where you are never alone so i would assign you a small project where you will work in pairs. The level of all of you is extremely high so there will be couples less capable than others but a couple that i am very curious to discover is the one formed by Jungwon and Y/n, you are the best students and i expect much from you two and in my opinion, you would be a perfect couple." You looked at Jungwon and he was giving a look of contempt to the professor and then to you, you never understood that boy, when he saw you always turned away or if you crossed him in the corridors changed ways, But in class, he loved to throw punches or beat you in tests; sometimes you wanted to be a vampire because Jungwon had the power to memorize everything instantly but other times it was nice to be a human and be able to beat him with your skills.

"Well guys, i would like to propose a little collaboration between you, you know that the job of a journalist is a job where you are never alone so i would assign you a small project where you will work in pairs. The level of all of you is extremely high so there will be couples less capable than others but a couple that i am very curious to discover is the one formed by Jungwon and Y/n, you are the best students and i expect much from you two and in my opinion, you would be a perfect couple." You looked at Jungwon and he was giving a look of contempt to the professor and then to you, you never understood that boy, when he saw you always turned away, or if you crossed him in the corridors changed the ways, but in class, he loved to throw punches or beat you in tests; sometimes you wanted to be a vampire because Jungwon had the power to memorize everything instantly but other times it was nice to be a human and be able to beat him with your skills. You went to Jungwon’s desk and watched him put his hand on his nose and make a disgusted face when he handed him the notebook with your ideas, you sniffed your wrists and maybe he did not like the scent of amber vanilla that you wore but your roommate had never bothered nor other vampires with whom you were in class. " Is there a problem with my perfume or is it just my presence that makes you feel like Yang Jungwon?" a small smile formed on his face and shivers of cold ran all over your body, you had always heard good things about Jungwon with humans but your sixth sense put you on alert when you were so close to him. " Don’t try to go over the line with me Y/n, i’ve never had you so close and i must be a little bit sensitive to your smell; things that i have already done with many human beings especially with girls" Roll your eyes because it looked so a puppy with those beautiful cat eyes but he had a cold heart and with you, he always behaved strangely " Don’t worry i don't want to know about your escapades with human beings, i came here to show you some topics that we could bring for the journalism project and i came up with an interesting topic for both you and me. How about talking about the fake news that we humans suffer in the vampire world and vice versa?" Jungwon put away all the material and surely had not heard anything you were saying because he was stuck chatting on the phone "Sure seems an interesting topic but now i must run away from you" You turned to watch him leave the room but after a few moments a cold presence was attached to you and shivers of cold poured into your body, Jungwon whispered in your ear and you would have been happier than ever without having heard those words come out of his mouth "But you want to be not me bitten is better if you change perfume because i don't like it, and if you are not your heart will beat no more not because you become a vampire but because i kill you. Write me on ig the day and at what time we have to be in the library, the more people there will be better it will be for you Y/n." You watched it disappear at the speed of light Jungwon and felt your heart beat wildly, surely telling you to make you scared; you had never heard of vampires that gnawed people, ok yes you had heard but in the term "bite" and that term was used mainly in sexual acts and Jungwon despised you so surely he wanted to scare you.

It had been a few days since you had seen Jungwon and your heart finally settled when you were near vampires, But every night nightmares of dark nightmares made their way into your mind and thoughts as if it were a bad joke of fate you always woke up sweaty and trembling at 3 or 3:30 at night, those hours were the periods of maximum paranormal activity and you always felt watched by someone but maybe they were just your paranoia. You had sent a message to Jungwon if he wanted to study with you for the project but obviously, he hadn’t answered, he had only visualized it and honestly, you were tired both physically and mentally of being behind that vampire, At the time you had sent by message you found yourself in the campus library; Soft lights ran through the entire corridor of the library and without wanting to find you studying in the less known area of the library but where you could study and feel at ease if you wanted to take small breaks.

A thud caught you by surprise and you watched Jungwon fall into the chair and put the computer in front of him, it was seriously beautiful had slightly wavy hair and some attached to his forehead, He wore a sweatshirt but how tight in the arms were it made his biceps stand out that every time you saw him they seemed more and more muscular and had a kind of makeup "Is this new to me the leader of the dark side of vampires, who wears eye-liner with a little bit of tinge to make his cat eyes stand out? Are you sure you’re a vampire and not a cat that turns to night?" a little laugh came out of his lips and you saw him protruding into the table until his face was a few centimeters from your "I like cats maybe even more than humans, they don’t need so much attention and love to be on their own exploring the world and surely have a smell better than your Y/n" You felt the tip of his nose attached to your neck and slightly felt your cheeks warm, he seriously looked like a cat sniffing you but didn’t seem so much to hate your smell as he always told you "Thank God you did not put that vanilla scent but the problem is that i really loathe your real smell as human 'Y/n" sunflower a moment to see it carefully sniff your neck and a slight redness formed in your cheeks, You pulled back your chair and looked at him badly "It doesn’t seem that much that you hate my neck especially the perfume that i emit, if it is more than five minutes that you smell me as if i was a feline looking for his lover" Jungwon when he heard your voice pulled back as if she was in trance from the smell you exhaled, would not confide it to anyone but they were all bullshit when he said that your smell was disgusting. Was literally the exact opposite, had already smelled you all over her body more than a year ago when she saw and heard for the first time in the classroom from study but put it away, but since you started having some lessons together he always became restless and only felt your smell in the classroom and because of that professor who had put you together to do that project he had to feel indifference and unpleasantness for you because no one had to understand that you had a strong power over him with your smell and did not dare to imagine how it was to have your blood between his lips and see you bent down and moan his name while he died on your neck with his vampire's teeth.

You watched for more than a minute Jungwon stared at you and with a snap in front of his eyes with your fingers he recovered from the trance he had while he sniffed you "Seriously Jungwon if you have a problem with me just tell me and we divide the tasks and before the presentation we start studying together if you can’t stand my presence or my smell so much, i never had any problems with other vampires and i also shared a course with your friend Hoon and he always behaved normally with me" Jungwon was seriously mortified by his behavior and couldn’t stand it either but the thing that made him most angry is hearing you talk about Sunghoon, because you called him Hoon and not Sunghoon? Hoon had always been attracted to vampires and never to humans. " There is no problem Y/n, just stay slightly further away as you are in class and everything will be fine, i want to work well on this project and get a good grade because i always dreamed of being a journalist and in this life, i would become one" seemed sincere for the first time and you put yourself in three chairs further away and started to study and program the project. After two hours you were seriously "in tune" If this could be called tuning be slightly apart you and Jungwon and text to understand your ideas even if you were in the same place but couldn’t speak out loud even if you were in a slightly isolated corner of the library. " Could you pass me that book on some fake news that came out about vampires in the human world, so i’ll do a little summary and then write the current ones especially those that came out with the advent of social media?" Jungwon unintentionally passed you before the book a sheet where he had written his ideas but to take it slightly graphed the tip of one finger and formed a slightly red patina, it had not even come out of the blood but i washed and licked immediately and your hand went immediately in the pocket of your sweatshirt. You didn’t have to rush to look at Jungwon but you saw him slightly whiter than usual and with dilated pupils "Run, ma belle otherwise, i can seriously bite your neck at this exact moment and suck your blood" For a few seconds you were full of fear but you had passed the physical test against vampires when they saw blood and ran right outside the library and you took refuge in the bar full of students where you could feel slightly safe when you saw your roommate With Sunghoon and Jake drink chocolate but you knew that in that cup there was also blood not entirely brown color had.

"Y/n you’ve already finished studying? It’s not like you to tell me that you missed your beloved favorite vampire!" you and T/n had a beautiful relationship even if you had discovered that she was a vampire you never made so many problems with her because she always respected you, made you feel comfortable while you were in the room together and ok sometimes left the envelopes of blood around the room but had never given you any problem.

"I wanted to drink a good chocolate with the cold that makes me out i seriously need but i must ask you urgently something about vampires" Sunghoon and Jake looked at you carefully and when they heard the question that you had made him a slight grin formed in his faces but a slight concern made its way into the minds of the vampires. " A vampire can always tolerate the smell of real blood? Especially if it does not come out of a wound, but why when Jungwon sees me always hurry to smell me, and when he smells my blood had light red eyes? Don’t tell me he wants to kill me i’m leaving this university, i hope to live for a while longer i don’t need to be bitten by a vampire who hates me" Sunghoon put a hand on your back to relax you and T/n took your hands slightly trembling to make you feel a little safe even if the contact between the cold of her hands and yours made your blood freeze but you could trust her.

"I think Jungwon is just stressed out and doesn’t drink his weekly blood Y/n, we live together but we are not attached to him 24h on 24h as once also because each of us has taken different paths of studies but i can assure you that it is due to the lack of blood in his body, calm that this evening we will make him drink and tomorrow he will be a "normal" person. "Let me just take away a curiosity, Jungwon has never tasted your real blood, Y/n?" You watched Jake and a laugh of terror came out from your lips "Why should Jungwon taste my blood, he despised me since the first day he saw me and i would not drink my blood from you vampires, especially in Jungwon". Jake nodded and looked at him with a worried face both Honn and T/l.

Jungwon was sitting contemplating the time lying in his bedroom bed, vampires hardly ever slept but he loved to take refuge in a safe place and that place was his room, He felt extremely weak but every time he tried to feel or drink blood from the bags that came into the blood bank each week, he had a rejection. He knew that he could not go on without drinking blood but since he had smelled for a few seconds the blood of Y/n had clicked in his head and thought only about her but especially about her smell. Heard the door of his room slamming and all 6 members invaded the view of his room and snorted "There is nothing to snort Jungwon, how long have you been drinking blood? You have dark circles in plain sight and this is a symptom of lack of blood in your body not to mention your lips are so cracked and almost purple. Please Jungwon you seriously need to drink blood and recover a little, it’s been more than a week that you’ve been locked in here and it’s not like you are among the sunniest people i know" Jay’s words warmed his heart even though that emotional woman had not felt it for a long time could sense the concern of Jay and the other members. " I seriously tried to drink a bag but i had a rejection for that blood since i felt for some moments the smell of the Y/n's blood i could not remove it from my head and i did not even taste it, Don’t know what’s happening to me i’m the leader of vampires and i’m getting weak for a stupid human..." Sunoo sat down next to Jungwon and hugged him, they had a platonic relationship of friendship and they had always helped each other in any dark moment and it hurt him to see a person with whom he had spent whole years being the light and the positive part of the group. " Maybe we could convince her to come and visit you with the excuse that you have to finish that journalism project and be able to reveal them seriously because you were so behaving with her" A sweet smile came out of Sunoo’s lips and a strong sense of confusion crept into Jungwon’s body "Oh my god how many times i have to tell you is not the soul mate, it’s just a human with a type of blood extremely different from others that has a strong power on my psyche, i bet my life that if it was away from me i would not have this kind of problem" a laugh came out of the smallest "God how do you make it so naive Jungwon, you are the leader of the vampires but you should be fucking happy to have found your soul mate instead you always act like an asshole with her, Wake up for a moment because if some other vampire comes to discover it they will want to steal you 100%. Yesterday i even told you that she had asked me about you and was seriously worried about you, and what she should be concerned about is her being a human without any kind of power and who could be hurt instantly" Niki was always quiet enough because he was the smallest of the group and had never responded badly to other members not to mention Jungwon who respected him very much. " Well at this point i should go to write to Y/n to come to our house otherwise a mini fight between vampires could break out!". Jake smiled at everyone and came out to call Y/n but he did not know that the human being who so detested his leader had done a lot of research and had discovered thanks to T/l that 90% was his supposed soul mate but there was that 10% that could have been chosen by the world of vampires to sacrifice his body and soul to the vampire leader who had little chance of survival.

Y/n was extremely terrified by Jake’s call to go home and study but knew that sooner or later he would have to face Jungwon both because the deadline for the project was expiring also because she wanted to know if she was her soul mate would have wanted to kill her, He did not trust any of the 7 vampires but Jake and Hoon seemed to have taken in sympathy even Niki the smallest of the group so he made strength and ran and played at the house of the 7 members.

Jake sat you down in the large room they shared in the dorm and a little black cat came up to them to sniff it and pursed "Well you’re one of the few people that Sinky at first gets along with, Niki is seriously right at this point!" You were crouching to poach the cat and 12 pairs of eyes looked at you through the large sitting room "Whose cat is this?" It was seriously beautiful and you thought it was Jay because he was always represented by a black cat "It was supposed to be a gift for me, but Sinky decided on his own who was his master or favorite member and that was the leader" Jay looked at you smiling and luckily that fear you had before entering was slowly diminishing until you saw Jungwon coming down the stairs and watching you carefully as you were caressing his precious cat. Jungwon had felt your presence already a few blocks from their home and seriously had to understand if you were really for him his soul mate or just a fixation on your blood, He had serious anxiety about seeing you and asking you to do something extremely intimate with him but only in that world could he understand if you were really his soul mate or maybe he already knew....

"Y/n, follow me that we must go ahead with the project" You looked at all the other members and nodded smiling "Isn’t it better to study in the living room or the kitchen?" Heeseung looked at Jungwon and made a sign to come down and make you feel comfortable, and Jungwon brought his notes down. "How are you?" You looked at Jungwon slightly with obvious dark circles, lips as dry and the knuckles of the hands slightly violet, he said to you "Could be better" and you were seriously worried about him, At first you couldn’t stand him but after discovering all the vampire nonsense, the tragic story between his mom and dad and his transformation lasted much longer than the others because the most powerful of vampires had decided that he should be the leader, Small feelings made their way into you. " Is there any way or anything i could do to make you feel better?" Jungwon’s gaze looked at you intensely and you felt yourself being observed by the other members, He shook his head and went on with the project but you knew there was only one way if he wanted to find out if you were seriously his soul mate so you went to sit next to Jungwon and you took his hand. It made you shiver because he seemed frozen in touch with you "What are you doing Y/n?" You began to draw little circles in his big, venous hands and saw a slight gleam in his eyes "I know, i’ll sound like a nosy lunatic but i’ve done some research on you and your behavior with me is that of a vampire in a state of uncertainty and no tolerance to any kind of person or being alive, the cause of this state at 95% is that of falling in love with a being not of the same living being and for your bad luck you are the leader of vampires so you have a lot of advantages but at the same time disadvantages because the first vampire of the pack who falls in love will suffer most of all and you are suffering right now Jungwon. A little whistle came out of Hoon’s lips "Fuck finally a person who tells you the truth in the face, i’m so happy that your soul mate is Y/n and not some slutty vampire trying to get into your pants only because you’re the most powerful vampire" A slight redness formed in your face and you looked softly at Jungwon. "There is only one way to know if you are exactly my soul mate Y/n, but i bet you will run away from me when you see my true nature!" You looked up and looked at Jungwon. "When have i ever backed away in my college years? No time and you know it too, so let’s end this forever Jungwon. Do what you have to do to see if i’m your soul mate but we all know that i am, who is it that spends the hours of the night watching me sleep from my dorm window or who is it that makes you go crazy? Me, Jungwon no other vampire or human". "Well if you are so curious to see my real nature follow me but do not try to run away because i could find you anywhere in the world" You nodded with a smirk and he took you to his room, your heart was beating crazy did you love challenges but maybe this was too much for you?

You sat in his bed and watched him close the Jungwon door to his room, I smiled a little bit and expected the worst but he took your hand and showed you around his room showing a picture of his mom "I would never hurt you Y/n, my mom made me discover the world of human beings before my transformation and I feel how your heart is beating quickly or how fear is making you anxious but I would never have thought to have to deal with another human. After his death, I did not want to have anything to do with the world of humans but then you came and I don’t know what’s happening to me..." Did not make him finish the sentence that you kissed him, you were seriously wanting to kiss him and feel the taste of his lips or hear his groans coming out of his lips and after a few seconds the kiss became more and more violent and desperate that you felt his canines become longer than necessary and his tongue licked you the lower lip and then slowly cognize for a second its canine to make you slightly out of blood, You felt his lips sucking your lower lip and a small moan came out of his lips, you strapped your arms to the bottom of his head slightly pulled his hair, did not hurt that little cut in your lip but excited you even more. "Fuck Y/n, why is it so good?" you felt yourself leaning on a huge pile of pillows under you and saw the eyes of Jungwon chocolate-colored become darker with a slight shade of red, the canines slightly more pointed than usual, His hair was unkempt, making him look even younger than he should be and you felt his cold body holding up without any force in yours. You began to kiss him again and slowly you started to caress under the light knitting of his muscles pronounced after the immense training and a slight moan came out of your lips, You looked at him, and with a nod he permitted you to take off the sweater, and surprised you the biceps more and more accentuated of the feline vampire and you began to kiss his neck until big hands took away the sweatshirt that you wore and remained only in the bra. Jungwon seriously wanted you to feel good so that you were no longer the one who kissed his neck but it was him and he felt how fast your blood pumped your heart and he was extremely proud that he was the one who made you feel this way and no other individual, had begun to give you little kisses until his true nature settled in him and little sweet bites made their way from your neck up to the protrusion of your firm breast, he seriously wanted to see you for what you were, Beautiful in her mind but she didn’t want to rush things with you. little sweet licks made their way where he had bitten you with his teeth and for him you were seriously a spectacle, you had a breathless breath, your wavy hair was spread in his cushions, Your smell invaded his whole room and your lips were slightly fat because of the small cut he had made with his canines.

"Ma belle, you can’t spare me from this moment, we’ll be forever you and me" was seriously true that fate had brought you together but there was something dark out there that was looking at you and contemplating against you.

*Taglist: @arclviie strxwbloody bamguetismee steddie-steddie jungwoosbaey

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buryhny · 6 months ago

Text

One Night Stand ; 40

➥ rundown ; as if the unexpected twist of a one-night stand turning out to be your CEO boss wasn't surreal enough, the situation takes a more challenging turn when both of you discover that you're expecting his child.

→ genre ; enemies to lovers | CEO au | pregnancy trope | slowburn

→ Jungkook x y/n

→ contains smut, fluff and angst

→ Chapter forty ; wc | 4.1k

primarily on Wattpad

index ⇢ next chapter

the visit to your parents is in less than a day and you're busy packing up a few clothes for the weekend trip to Toronto. you'd be lying if you're not nervous because you are. you can feel it in your bones and veins, the anxiety is truly not funny.

Jungkook had been busy with work, he'd been coming home late, very late in fact. he would text you to not stay up for him, to have your dinner take your pills and get to bed. after you spent the first night in his room, he never wanted you to leave, even if you tell him that it's okay, that you're comfortable in your room.

he was not having it, he needed to come back home and see you sleeping on his bed, under his covers. It's 11:15 PM, and he still hasn't come home. You decide to finish packing the last of your clothes before calling it a night, leaving a few items to tuck into your carry-on later. Your phone lights up with a message from your mother:

*"I can't wait to see you, Y/N!"*

Letting out a breath you didn't realize you were holding, you toss the phone aside and sit on the edge of the bed. Your hand instinctively rubs your growing bump as you gaze down at it, worry swirling in your mind—for yourself and the little one. Your parents are open-minded, but will they accept that you're carrying the child of a man they've never heard of? Especially when you were raised to believe that marriage should come before pregnancy.

They're not overly religious, but those fundamental beliefs were deeply instilled in you, and this was one of them. you don't want to disappoint them but you also can't change anything now. What's done is done and now you've accepted your life and the child you carry.

this is gonna be your life now. After zipping the suitcase closed, you push it aside, your mind feeling heavy yet resigned. You take the pills, washing them down with a glass of water, before turning off the lights and sliding beneath the duvet. The view from his windows catches your gaze, a mix of city lights and darkness, as your eyes grow heavy, you feel the bed dip.

you turn to look over your shoulder and see Jungkook gazing at you with his doe eyes. "did I disturb you?" he whispers and you shake your head as you carefully turn to face him. It's been four nights since you last saw him before drifting off to sleep, so the feeling of him beside you instead of an empty bed brings a sense of quiet relief.

he gets closer to you and pulls you towards him. You notice the exhaustion etched in his droopy eyes. "How was work today?" you ask softly, your fingers tracing gentle, imaginary circles on his chest. His gaze stays fixed on your face, filled with a longing that tugs at your heart. He's missed you all day, and seeing you asleep when he got home only deepened his frustration.

"Okay, stressed out," he finally replies with a heavy sigh. you figure that he doesn't really wanna talk about it so you decide not to press further. "are you sure that you're okay to fly tomorrow? We can go when you're free.." you say in a whisper. he's trapped in work and flying so far is only adding to his stress that you think he doesn't need.

he shakes his head and smiles softly. "Don't worry about it, baby." he speaks as he reaches out to take your hand in his, he missed the warmth of it so much. "I'm just waiting to escape this hellhole with you, even if it's just for a weekend," he says, his voice tired but soft. You nod with a small smile, liking the idea of spending time alone with him too, even though you're going to see your parents and not on some vacation.

"It'll be okay," you murmur, cupping his face as he leans in to kiss you gently. "How's... she doing today?" he asks, glancing at your bump. You grab his hand and place it there with a smile. "She's been kicking me all day, craving crackers and cheese. Quiet now, though—probably asleep." He chuckles, running his hand over your belly, his touch warm and careful.

He leans closer, nuzzling into your neck, and you let your fingers trail through his hair and down his stiff shoulders. "You're so tense," you say, frowning a little. "Want me to give you a massage?" "Don't worry about me, baby. I'm fine," he says, but you whine a little, determined to help him relax. He sighs, giving you a small grin as he finally gives in.

"Alright, just for a few minutes. do not want you to be tired" he whispers as he moves closer to you. "i haven't done anything Jungkook, come on turn around." he sleeps on his stomach as you sit up and turn to his side so you can give him some relief. he moans at the feeling of your fingers working down his neck and shoulders. he'd been sitting straight for hours as he worked on papers and typing. it feels so good when your fingers press against his skin, it's like magic.

his pain fades away the more you touch him and if he had the energy he would kiss you and thank you a hundred times but he's too tired to lift his finger. you smile at the sounds that leave his lips. As you continue your massage, your thoughts drift to him.

He does so much for you—not just tending to your basic needs but going out of his way to satisfy your cravings, no matter what they are. Even if he comes home late and you're already asleep, you always wake up to find the food you were craving, which makes your day. While Jungkook might not be actively engaging with the baby yet, the effort he puts into trying warms your heart and makes you genuinely happy.

you get so lost in your thoughts that you don't hear him call out your name. "Baby?" he repeats and you hum as a reply. "come here." He mumbles softly, eyes barely open as he struggles to stay awake. "Yes?" you prompt, leaning closer to his face. Without warning, he pulls you down for a quick peck, catching you off guard and making your heart flutter.

"What was that for?" you ask with a chuckle, the warmth of the moment lingers. His head drops back onto the pillow, and he lets out a contented groan as the tension in his muscles melts away. "Just... wanted to thank you before I fall asleep," he mumbles into the pillow. You snigger as you let your fingers run through his hair.

He loves loves loves it when you touch his hair. It scratches some part of his brain and spine, it sends chills down it and he smiles as he drifts off to sleep. You notice that he passed out so you lay back down beside him, you tuck your hand under your cheek and watch him. His soft cheek rests against the pillow, his lips slightly parted, with the tips of his hair brushing over his forehead. It's a sight that you enjoy the most.

While his neatly oiled and parted hair has a charm that steals your heart every morning, there's something entirely different about him like this. His loose hair and comfortable, homely attire are so peaceful and endearing, it's the Jungkook that you fell for. You don't realize when your eyes close while watching him, but it does and you find yourself waking up in the afternoon to an empty cold bed.

Jungkook wraps up his day early, delegating tasks to his team before leaving the building. The flight is at 8 PM, and he still needs to pack. He'd left for work earlier than usual, determined to clear his emails and meetings so that nothing would interrupt the weekend trip to your parent's place. Though he has no idea what to expect, he's made sure not to bring any of his workload along. Still, nerves simmer under the surface.

He's never met your parents before, though he's heard plenty about them from you—they seem warm and family-oriented. But to them, he's still a stranger. He's nothing more than someone in your life, without a defined title or role, and that thought terrifies him more than he's willing to admit. he'd always told you to stop overthinking and to calm down but right now, he needs to follow his own words yet he doesn't.

he picks up a few items on his way back home including the crackers that you spoke about late at night, even through his drowsiness, he mentally notes the little things you say, despite his heavy eyelids and the pull of sleep, his attention lingers on you, catching every word you say. he isn't greeted by you as he enters, he walks upstairs and passes by your room only to see you staring at your clothes that have been pressed by the staff.

he frowns and knocks on your door before he walks inside. you tear your gaze to look at him, he notices the worry on your face and feels his heart heavy. "nervous again?" He asks, and you nod, a pout forming on your lips. He understands how you feel—he's anxious too—but he knows nothing compares to the nerves you're dealing with.

After all, imagine meeting your parents after a few years, and then finding out you're pregnant with a child from a man they don't know, who isn't even married to you. Just thinking about it is enough to make anyone terrified. you exhale deeply as he holds your hand and looks at you. "I'm...nervous too. scared. but we both can face this, okay?"

he attempts to help you relax and it works for the time being after he places a kiss on your forehead. "gonna pack my stuff." "I'll help!" You follow him to his room to help him pack for the weekend. The two of you are quiet, your minds filled with unspoken words and thoughts, yet neither of you says a thing. Jungkook looked for a few hotels he could book for the nights, just in case your parents don't approve of him staying with you.

He doesn't mention it to you, though—he doesn't want to add to your worries. he didn't have much to pack so the both of you walked downstairs to have a snack before you left. he passed the crackers to you and a small smile lit up your face. He knows you're not going to speak with the excitement you usually have because your anxiety is taking over your mind, but that's okay. As long as you don't panic, he's fine.

Jungkook sips his latte while gently patting Bam's head. You're unusually quiet, and even though you know you can tell him anything, the words just don't come. You dip another cracker into the cream cheese and munch on it, having already eaten about 11, even though it hasn't been too long since lunch. You devour the crackers as if they might disappear. Jungkook notices but says nothing, holding back a smile as he watches you savor the snack.

He changes into a black Calvin Klein denim jacket and jeans, pairing them with a white T-shirt. You slip into a comfy, oversized sweater and sweatpants. Knowing how quickly you get cold—especially after the Paris flight—he grabs one of his thick jackets for you. He remembers how rude he was when you took your time coming downstairs earlier, and the memory makes him feel bad. This time, he waits patiently by your side so you both can walk down together.

"I'll carry that for you," he offers, nodding toward your hand luggage. You shake your head, insisting it's not heavy. He gives you a stern look, and you sigh, pouting as you hand it over to him. He ends up carrying both his backpack and your bowling bag without a second thought. The driver loads your luggage while Jungkook holds the door open for you, letting you take your time as you reach for his hand for support.

Your bump is big, and while this isn't the ideal time to travel, it feels like the best moment—things will only get harder in the later weeks. He sits beside you, close—too close—unlike last time. he watches you the whole ride, his eyes don't leave your figure, you're his view, and the streets aren't as beautiful as you.

the two of you remain silent, each lost in your thoughts, trying to calm your nerves. Jungkook worries about what your parents might think of him and if they'll push him away. Meanwhile, you're anxious about how they'll react when they see you pregnant on their doorstep. he wears a mask and advises you to wear one too.

The airport is a breeding ground for germs, and Jungkook doesn't want to risk you catching anything, especially with how easily you're susceptible. It's also another way to avoid the media, stopping them from taking any images without consent and invading your privacy. His hand holds yours gently as you walk side by side. Since you can't walk fast, he matches your pace, making sure you're comfortable.

Arriving about 30 minutes early, the lounge becomes the perfect spot to relax. You smile warmly at him when he chooses a quiet, private corner where there aren't many people. It gives you a chance to take off your mask and rest your swollen feet on the footrest. Jungkook brings you some desserts from the available selection. "what's all this?"

you ask. "desserts ma'am!" he says and sits in front of you as he takes your feet from the footrest and places them on his lap. "Jung-" "Have your desserts while I relieve this- swollen feet." he says and gestures to you to start eating. you smile at him. He's so caring and different from the last time you both were here at the airport.

he massages your feet gently, frowning at how big they are. it looks like someone blowing air into your feet, they look like balloons. " is this normal?" he asks while his fingers press and rub carefully. you nod with your mouth full of the sweet and tangy cherry tart. " this- looks really bad." he says worriedly. "it's fine, I've been dealing with this for months now." he hums.

"here." You hold out the tart to him, but he shakes his head, telling you he got them for you, so you should be the one to enjoy it. "One bite," he says, opening his mouth as you place the tart between his lips. He takes a bite, flakes of the pastry fall to his jacket and the jams stick to the corners of his lips. you push yourself forward, dusting off his black denim and wiping off the jam with your fingertips. "Nice, right?" you ask.

"Mm hmm," he mumbles, a small smile tugging at his lips. It's funny to him, thinking back to the last time you both were here. Back then, you didn't like the idea of him bringing you sweets, but you ate them anyway, making a big show of how delicious they were. Then you forced him to try them, despite his countless attempts to say no.

When he finally gave in and took a bite, he pretended it tasted awful, even though it didn't, just so you wouldn't get the chance to boast about it and inflate your ego. and here you both are, feeding each other tarts while he massages your feet only because you walked so far and he's worried for you. wiping off each other's faces and no rude comments and tone passed, just love and affection and more love. boarding into the flight was quite the hassle,

he made sure to let you walk inside carefully, and he requested the people behind him to wait until you got to your seat but some of them were arrogant and didn't want to show kindness, which angered him. you whispered a few, "It's okay" "I'm fine" as you pulled Jungkook to walk with you. "fuck them" he mumbles under his breath as he adjusts the seatbelt for you to fit your bump. "calm down babe." you say and somehow that immediately eases him.

"your frown lines are gonna sit forever. relax them." you say as your finger reaches to rub it away and he chuckles as he sits beside you. he asks you if you're okay from time to time and makes sure you're all comfortable. when the flight is about to take off, you don't panic. because Jungkook is holding your hand and rubbing his thumb against the back of your hand, soothing you and taking away all your thoughts and tension.

he's freely able to hold you and touch you anytime now so he doesn't hesitate as he holds you tight when the flight takes off. telling you it's alright, I'm here. you feel so loved when he does these little things like making sure to order the easy meal for you, some extra buns and bread so you can munch on something while you watch the romance movie on the screen. you feel like you're in one, after meeting Jungkook everything feels like a movie anyway, everything he says and does just makes you fall for him harder and harder.

"you need anything?" he asks when he sees you moving around. "I wanna pee.." You whisper as you struggle to unbuckle your seatbelt. Jungkook quickly unbuckles his own and leans over to help you. "Want me to come with you?" he asks softly. You shake your head, still holding his hand as you carefully get out of your seat. After taking care of what you need to do, you walk back to your seat, and Jungkook watches you the whole time.

He waits for you to return, and somehow, that simple gesture makes something stir in your stomach. He smiles at you and asks, "All good?" You nod, and he gently places his hand on your bump, giving it a soft rub. "I'm gonna rest for a while," you say, and Jungkook quickly lowers the seat, turning it into a bed. You lay down, letting out a yawn as you pull up the blanket they offered, settling in for some much-needed rest.

He gazes at you for a while, and you're used to it by now—him simply watching you. It makes you feel safe, knowing he's there, looking at you with such quiet attention. "Good night," you whisper. He notices you pulling the blanket higher, as if it's not warm enough, so he grabs the jacket he brought and gently drapes it over you.

You sigh in contentment at his gesture, pulling the jacket tighter around you. His scent surrounds you, and it lulls you into a peaceful sleep, your body relaxing fully as you drift off. He wakes you up to have something before taking your night pills, gently feeding you because you're too sleepy.

the flight journey was comfortable and easy for you, although running to the washroom was frustrating considering how you must walk a certain distance and also wait until the person walks out, everything else was quite okay. you ask him frequent questions and speak random stuff- "How long till we land?" "did you have your meal?" "I think the guy who went to the washroom before me had done too much of an explosion."

Jungkook was always there for you, even if he dozed off, your movements would wake him up just in case you needed something or needed relief for your feet. You slept through most of the time except for your meals, while Jungkook didn't allow himself even a moment for a full rest. he had so much running through his mind like what if your parents tell you to stay with them? What is he gonna do without you? He had never felt more anxious than he did now; even the silly comedy movie couldn't draw a laugh from him, not even a faint smile.

he kept looking at you from time to time, reaching to hold your hand, as if preparing himself for the possibility of having to part ways with you, even if only for the weekend. when it was time for landing, you were awake sipping on apple juice with your eyes closed while you listened to some music. Jungkook urges you to drink quickly so he can return the cup to the flight attendant.

He adjusts your seatbelt and pulls your seat upright, noticing your silence. You haven't been looking at him or asking questions, and he can tell you're feeling uneasy. Here you both are, in Canada—your homeland. "Hey, you alright?" he whispers, his voice soft. You nod and reach for his hand just as the announcement signals it's time to land. His grip on your palm is firm and reassuring. "Remember to breathe,"

he reminds you. Following his guidance, you focus on your breath until the plane touches down safely. he helped you adjust your clothes that had ridden up your chest, placed your leftover snacks into your bag and carried it for you.

he draped his coat over your shoulders, The temperature outside was warm as Jungkook stepped off the flight, but inside the airport, you still feel a lingering chill. Your eyes wander across the familiar surroundings, and a small smile forms on your lips. It's been three years since you moved to Korea, and while not much has changed here, the sight of it still stirs something deep within you. when everything was done, he got a taxi and helped you sit in the back seat,

asking you to tell the man your address. when it leaves your lips, you then know that this is real, this is so real and a sudden weight is added to your shoulders, you even feel it in your stomach. Jungkook feels it too, so this time, both of you gaze out the window, quietly taking in the scenery. There's a gentle space between you, not because of anything, but so you both can lose yourselves in your thoughts. As you approach the familiar streets and neighborhood, you notice the streetlights flickering on, casting a soft glow.

The place hasn't changed at all, and a warmth spreads through you as you take in the sight of the small, beige houses—so simple, yet so lovely. It fills your heart with a quiet comfort, the sense of home you thought you'd left behind. the car stops in front of the ash house with a garden where a swing sits. "are we here?"

Jungkook asks softly and you give him a short nod. he opens the door for you and takes your bag with his, thanking the cab driver for taking out the luggage and for the ride. you both stand in front of your house, the house you grew up in with your loving parents. you take a deep breath, trying to control the tears that threaten to leave as you glance down at your bump. Jungkook stands beside you, waiting for you to take the move.

He notices you gulping a couple of times, your features dull and your face looking ashen even under the bright moonlight. Gently, he takes your hand in his, giving it a reassuring squeeze as he whispers, "Come on." You let out a sigh and nod quickly, moving towards the deep grey door. he helps you climb the three stairs until you both are standing in front of the door.

"I'm here, with you and for you. Don't worry, we're in this together." Jungkook whispers, his hand never leaving yours. Your fingers itch to press the doorbell, the tension thick in the air. The man beside you, trying to appear strong for your sake, hides his fear behind a composed exterior, wanting you to feel safe. But deep inside, as the seconds drag on, he's terrified.

The weight of the moment presses down on him, his heart racing with anxiety. your finger almost touches the white bell but the door opens before you can. there your mother stands before you, a smile on her face drains down as her gaze runs down your face to your bump and then to the man beside you. you gulp down the biggest stone in your throat, and Jungkook does too. "Mom-"

"What the hell?!!"

next chapter ⇢

#ask #btswritersclub #bts #jungkook #one night stand #bts fanfic #jungkook fanfic #theagstd #jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook x y/n

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g4rvez-r3id · 3 months ago

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:¨ ·.· ¨:`· . ୨୧⠀masterlist!

SPENCER REID

smut / 18+ | fluff / ★ | angst / ↯ | all of the above / シ

Latest Work: Louder… - You and Spencer on a couch… need I say more? 18+

SERIES OR MULTI-PARTERS

Back To You / Mini Series (fem! reader) シ

When You’re Lost in the Darkness, Look for the Light - Your ex, Spencer Reid, has just lost his girlfriend due to her being murdered. When all else fails with the BAU team helping him get through this loss, the only person left to help is you.

Let Me Stay - You and Spencer have gone back to normal, somewhat. But it only takes one conversation to ruin that all again. All you wanna do is stay, but he won’t let you.

Back To You - Spencer finally realizes that he wants you to stay and that he loves you and he proves to you just how much he does. 18+

Anything For Ellie / Mini Series (single mom! reader) シ

Summary / You are Spencer Reid’s next door neighbor, a single mother with a five year-old daughter trying to get by. It’s been three months since you’ve last seen Spencer and little did you know, it was because he was in prison, accused of a crime he didn’t commit. And now Spencer has opened his heart to you as you have to him. But when he realizes he could hurt you in the long run, he begins to push you away. Will you let him?

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three 18+

more to come!

Silver Springs / Series (fem! reader) シ

Summary / You’ve been in love with Will Lamontagne for years. But when the BAU comes knocking, it’s like you’ve missed your chance with him entirely when Jennifer Jareau comes and sweeps Will off his feet. And then comes Spencer Reid, the man who has had a thing for Jennifer since they started working together. Turns out you two have something in common.

Prologue

more to come!

ONESHOTS

One Bed - You and Reid get paired together in a hotel room after a case, only to discover there’s only one bed in the hotel room. And that said hotel room is freezing. ★

Protector - You and Spencer have been together a few months and he’s beginning to notice how often you keep your guard up and he converses with you about his concerns and so you tell him why you act the way you do. ★ ↯

I’m Here, Now - Your boyfriend, Spencer gets released from prison and you’re his first stop after dealing with Cat Adams and her schemes. And all he wants to do is see you and love you. ★ 18+

Nice Car - You’d always had a crush on Dr. Spencer Reid but you’re sure he’s never had eyes on you. But he takes you home after a night out with the team and you’re definitely proven wrong about him not having eyes on you. 18+

Hands to Myself - Since Spencer got out of prison, you two have a bit of a problem keep your hands to yourselves. 18+

I Love You, I’m Sorry - You left the BAU and your boyfriend, Spencer, after a case took a hefty toll on you. You only left behind a letter, explaining yourself and why you had to leave. Four years later, you find yourself back in DC on a whim. You learn that maybe it wasn’t such a good idea. ↯

Love Of My Life - REQUEST / You’re fully expecting to spend Valentine’s Day alone with year with your husband on a case. To your surprise, he comes home early and wants to help you destress, especially with you two trying for a baby. But little does he know, you have some news that’s going to change his world forever. ★ 18+

A Sunflower In The Graveyard - You’re the new kid on the block— joining the BAU during Spencer’s prison sentence and since then, he’s ignored you despite your efforts in trying to start a mere friendship with him. But when all hope seems lost, Spencer seems to show his soft spot for you when a case really gets to you. ★ ↯

Free Now - You’re about to get married to the man of your dreams. But the person you’re supposed to get married to knows that the man of your dreams isn’t him and instead is your best friend — your man of honor, so to speak. He might’ve just done you a favor. ★ ↯

(Not) A Jinx - Spencer has been going to a new coffee shop recently and that’s where he finds you — a clumsy barista who screws up orders and asks for help all of the time. After a confrontation with a customer, Spencer sees you and assures to you that you’re not a jinx like you seem to think you are. ★ ↯

BLURBS

Dream A Little Dream - Spencer comes home from work and finds you sleeping in bed and he’s completely mesmerized by you as you sleep. ★

No One Is Alone - Spencer realizes you guys might have more in common than he thought when he finds out your parent also has schizophrenia. ★ ↯

A Chat About Books - Spencer catches you reading a rather disturbing book on the jet and a discussion about books and reading ensues. ★

Book Lovers - Spencer sees you at a bookstore and buys you a book just to be able to start a conversation with you. ★

Bad Day - You come home from a really bad day and your boyfriend, Spencer is there to save the day… and hold you while you cry. ★ ↯

Naughty Boy - You and Spencer are trying to have a little fun in secret until Emily walks in… Spencer decides to make it a little more interesting underneath your desk. 18+

#spencer reid #criminal minds #mgg #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds fanfic #masterlist #g4rvez-r3id

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ljubimaya · 2 months ago

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♱ 𝐑𝐔𝐍 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐌𝐄 Baji Keisuke x Reader: 𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐓

♱SYNOPSIS: A call late at night alerted you of the declining health of your grandma. Taking matters into your own hands, you decided to travel to her small village far away from your big city life, only to make an encounter that would change your life.

♱T/W: fem bodied reader/afab reader (no pronouns used tho), aged up characteres (20+), mentions of death, mentions of an unnamed illness, predator-prey dynamic, a tiny bit suggestive, but otherwise, this chapter's really plot heavy, also not proofread, eventuell dark content and smut in the following parts so mdni

♱W/C: 7.8k words

Masterlist Next

It was another sleepless night for you. You crouched over your bright laptop, fingers gliding over your keyboard in record time as you tried to finish your coursework. You’ve already gotten used to this – to pull all-nighters to meet your self imposed academic goals, to bounce from university to your part time job to hitting the library to revise your notes and add new information you’d find in the books. Occasionally, you would have enough energy and time to visit the gym near your apartment. Caffeine might do wonders to your productivity, but running on the treadmill while listening to a True Crime podcast has saved your mental health from completely collapsing. Plus, your roommate told you physical activity helps with academics, which is an added bonus.

Your fingers hurt from typing out your thoughts, feeling stiff from the lack of breaks. You rationalized it with the upcoming holidays, knowing you would have a few weeks to yourself after the seemingly never-ending exam weeks. After you’d finish this, you could curl up in your warm bed, breathe in the clean smell of your freshly washed sheets instead of inhaling the smell of old books and caffeine - which you didn’t mind that much, they just didn’t help you fall asleep like the new washing detergent your roommate raved over. After you’d finish this, you could also finally stop complaining to said roommate about this particular essay.

Truth be told, you would have been finished with this maybe a week ago, but your roommate, Emma Sano, had to drag you from club to club to get her mind off the guy she was interested in. The blonde woman knew the ways to your heart, so she looked at you, teary-eyed, and told you how she was sick and tired of his hot and cold ways. You, too, were sick and tired of it, especially since you knew he was head over heels with her but somehow couldn’t pull his head out of his ass to finally confess. So, instead of wiping her tears away and trying to explain that sometimes, men are just like that and that he actually loves her, that she should reach out to him and tell him how she felt, you let her take your hand and usher you into your room. Somehow, her tears dried fast whenever you’d allow Emma to dress you up for any occasion, so you let it happen, ignoring the nagging voice in your head to rip yourself free from her grip and run to the library to finish your essay.

You shook your head at the memory. You really couldn’t afford to distract yourself now, not when you had literal hours to turn in your essay.

So you leaned your head to the side, wrapping your lips around the plastic straw attached to the huge, lavender coloured flask Emma got you for your last birthday and taking a huge sip of the hot coffee inside. You felt the caffeine rush through your body, your heartbeat quickening from the copious amount of the bitter beverage you have already consumed.

You were in the zone, about to finally finish this essay and turn it in on time, but fate had other plans. You were ripped out of your focused state by the sudden vibration of your phone. This was pretty standard for you whenever you were in the library; you’d silence your phone so you would be able to work as efficiently as you could. Today, you must have just turned off your ringtone and forgotten about the vibration.

Gonna get a heart attack, you thought begrudgingly, taking a deep breath to calm your hammering heart before looking around to see if you were alone in the library - which you were. Thankfully.

Next, you looked at the caller’s ID - it was your mom. Eyebrows knitted in confusion. You were thrown off. Usually, it would have been Emma calling you at this hour to get you to come back home. Alarm bells run in your head already. You knew that your mom wouldn’t call you at 2.30 a.m. if she just wanted to talk - this must be urgent.

“Hello? Mom?” you whispered into the phone, trying to be quiet to respect the library’s rules. Instead of your mother’s usual cheery voice, you were listening to silent sobs and sniffs. Your heart felt heavy upon hearing your mother’s soft crying “Mom, what’s wrong?”

“Oh honey, where do I even start?” She replied shakily. You heard her taking a deep breath, before she continued with a more stable voice “I know this is a bad time, and I’m so sorry to call you at this hour. You must have been asleep already, but I just needed to call you” You remained silent, not wanting to correct her. Knowing her, she would drop whatever subject she called you for to scold you about you staying in the library in the dead of the night, so you let it be.

“It’s about your grandmother” Your breath hitched “She is - her health is declining” your mother choked up. She must have been in your grandmother’s village to take care of her, just like she told you two weeks ago. A few months ago, your grandfather passed away, leaving your grandmother to live alone in her cottage in the middle of nowhere. Grief left its marks on her, for she refused to eat and got so sick it left her bedridden and unable to attend her husband’s funeral. Ever since, it seemed like a stagnant decline. Your relatives pitched in, traveling far distances to take care of her. This time, it was your mother’s turn to stay with her.

“She has a high fever and can’t walk anymore. That stubborn woman declines every meal I make her and doesn’t even want to see the doctor” Your mother vented “She’s fallen asleep maybe ten minutes ago after I forced her to eat some vegetable soup”

“Man, soup? That’s barely a meal” Your mother sighed through the phone “I know, but that’s better than her not eating anything” She paused again, voice stabilizing after her little rant “I can’t stay here any longer. I only took two weeks off of work, and none of your aunts, uncles, or cousins are able to come. I can’t leave her alone here either. God knows what will happen if I leave this woman unmonitored”

Your eyes wandered to the digital clock of your laptop. 2.37 a.m., you would have roughly three more hours to finish and edit your essay and turn it in. Realistically, you knew you needed every single second of those three hours - it would be an academic miracle if you finished and edited it before duetime. But you weren’t thinking about the precious seconds slipping through your hands like sand.

“When will you leave for home?” You whisper-asked into your phone. The woman on the other line sighed deeply “In about two days, but I might have to stay for longer. I have already talked to my boss about possibly doing work from home, but the internet connection here is as unpredictable as the weather here” Your mother abruptly paused. A muted creaking broke the silence with small tapping noises following suit “Honey, I gotta hang up soon. I think your grandma’s awake again”

“Mom, you don’t have to stay with grandma any longer. I will pack my suitcase in the morning and take the first train to her village” You quickly interjected before your mother could hang up the phone - which she has been doing rather often since she started to skip on her nightly eight hours of sleep in favor of monitoring her mother’s health. One moment, you would be talking about the newest assignments your asshole of a professor would give you, only to be met with the deafening beeping sound before the line went silent. While it was annoying for you, you knew you would be rushing to her bed if your own mother was ill, so you let it slide.

This time, you were faster than your mother. Thank God you were faster than her.

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel pressured to come here and take care of your grandmother” she hesitated, guilt and the slur of tiredness etched into her voice “I know you are very busy with your university courses, and me and your grandma are super proud of you for following this hard academic path. I wouldn’t want to stand between you and your ambition, sweetheart, and neither does your grandma” Warmth flooded your body at your mother’s praises, but oh are you your mother’s daughter - stubborn to the core.

No amount of sweet talking could change your mind if you have already decided on what to do; your mother knew this too well as well, being the prime victim to your unbending will to fulfill what you deem fit. So you were all in to put your foot down at all costs.

“I understand, mom, but neither of you could ever hinder my academics. Seeing as winter break is starting soon, I see it as the perfect opportunity to step in momentarily and take care of grandma. Besides, I haven’t had the time to visit her since grandpa passed away. I would rather see her alive now rather than attend her funeral with a heavy conscience” You stuttered out the last part. Getting emotional over your own words wasn’t what you intended. You didn’t even want to bring up your grandma’s possible death. Your mother was stressed as she is, and you didn’t want to make her worry more than she already was. Having noticed your slip up - curse you self-inflicted sleep deprivation - you took a few deep breaths and felt your racing heart calm down before continuing “I just want to help out too, mom. I wanna help her get better if I can”

You were met with tense silence. You pulled your lower lip between your teeth, nervously chewing on it as you waited for your mother to reply back to you. Of course, she would much rather take care of her mother on her own. If you had to put yourself into her shoes, you probably would have told your daughter not to worry, that you got this, that while you appreciate her for offering her help that she still should focus on her life goals. Not because she is incapable, but because you would see it as your duty to care for your mother, where she was the one bedridden and refusing to eat.

“You know what? You are right, you could lend your grandma a helping hand” your mother finally whispered into the speaker “To be honest, I am at the end of my wit. I don’t know how to help her, or get her to even go to the doctor to get a formal checkup” The woman sighed, tiredness seeping through her tone “I would be more than grateful to you if you could come here. Only if it’s not an inconvenience for you”

“Of course not” the words shot from your mouth, faster than bullets could hit their target. For the first time in your life, you were ecstatic about being wrong. Newfound energy rushed through your veins into your brain. You were determined to help your grandma recover, and you were motivated to put some weight off your mother’s shoulders.

Nodding to yourself, you announced “Then it’s settled! I will be making my way to grandma’s first thing in the morning” More rustling sounds came from your mother’s end along with her sighing “I can’t thank you enough, honey. I will go check up on grandma and head to bed now. You should go back to sleep, tomorrow’s going to be a long day for you”

Your breath hitched. As you wished your mom a good night and hung up, you were faced with the severity of your decisions. Not only did you promise to go to bed right after hanging up, knowing fully well you were still in the library, but you also agreed to travel to your grandmother’s village in less than five hours. The warmth you were feeling quickly diminished as you remembered your unfinished assignment and the ticking clock. Time truly slipped through your fingers like sand, especially since you were talking twenty minutes on the phone.

So you threw yourself back into your work, typing long sentences on your keyboard at record time, yoursole motivator being finishing your assignment and rushing back home to get at least a good three hours of sleep.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

You were spent. Having had two hours to wrap up with your assignment was a hard challenge, but you persevered and turned it in at the very last minute. Usually, you would have not only started the assignment earlier than you did this time, but you would have been extra meticulous with the editing process. Today, however, you haven’t had the time to spare your assignment even a glance before you sent your fifteen page document to your professor. You didn’t want to think of the possible mistakes you made - not that you were able to form a coherent thought at all after the emotional rollercoaster. All you truly could think about was crawling under your freshly washed blankets and falling asleep.

So you made your way from your university library to your apartment. Striding through the night was usually nerve wrecking for you. You’d walk fast through the less crowded streets, paying no mind to the cat calls of drunken men and vulgar expressions of perfectly conscious men. You have learned quickly that fighting off intoxicated men was easier than sober men after you have enrolled in your current uni, but your preferred method of staying safe is having them not perceive you at all - which was the reason you would walk faster as soon as the street light would turn on. There was no reason you had to stay outside anyway, might as well hurry home to hit the hay.

This night wasn’t any different. You saw sketchy looking people in all corners, in the bus, in the subway, and even in your apartment complex. Before you knew it, you were no longer maneuvering your way home between trash cans and other people enjoying the nightlight. You stood before your apartment door, fishing your keys out from your heavy university bag before putting the keys in and turning them before you could twist the handle.

You tried to open and close the door behind you as quietly as you could before slipping off your warm boots and putting them neatly next to the door. Your clothed feet made contact with the cold, hard floor. You and Emma have been resourceful, trying not to overspend on heating and light since you two barely made ends meet. So if someone would leave a room and forget to turn off the lights, it would become a topic you and your roommate would argue about.

You walked towards your bedroom tiredly, craving the warmth and comfort your bed would offer you, but the lights radiating from the living room caught your full attention. Not knowing whether to be annoyed or concerned, you entered the living room, ready to turn off the light switch and tell Emma once again to be mindful of your dwindling money to spend only to see her wide awake on the sofa.

The blonde woman wore a stern expression on her face, a sight that felt foreign to you. Normally, she would be cheerful and smiling, and most importantly, still in bed at seven a.m. on Fridays. Having lived with her for the past year, you have come to know her schedule like the back of your hand, after all.

“Where were you?” Emma asked, her voice laced with a demanding, motherly tone she usually reserved for her older brothers. You have heard that tone plenty of times whenever Mikey, Emma’s older half brother, would come and visit her, and every time you were grateful not to be on the receiving end of Emma’s scolding. Oh well, you guessed it was your turn.

You grimaced, knowing fully well Emma wasn’t asking you where you were - as much as you knew about her busy schedule and off days, she knew about your restless nights in the library.

Sighing, the blonde continued as you remained silent “Listen, I know you want this degree more than anything, but it’s not worth jeopardizing your health for it. I can’t even remember seeing you anywhere near your bedroom since last month”

“That’s a reach, Emma” you nervously chuckled, your tired legs gave in as soon as you were close enough to the couch. Slumping down on the hard cushions, you winced in pain as you collided with the furniture piece, however you recovered quickly “You know I've been in my bedroom on occasion” you added, trying to joke your way out of the blonde’s wrath. Of course that didn't work.

Scorned, Emma huffed, stretching her arm out and pointing her index finger accusatory at you “You know damn well this isn't funny to me in the slightest! You can't keep playing with your health like that” the blonde sighed, calming her down as she lowered her arm and sat down to the much softer armchair next to the couch “At least you will have the winter break to sleep and relax more…. And I better not see you with your nose in any books either”

Your smile fell. It's not like you were disagreeing with Emma; you knew you had the tendency to overwork yourself. You knew that, realistically, not even the measly four weeks could make up for the sleepless nights you endured to perform well.

“If only that was so easy” You mumbled, head dropping and gaze falling to your intertwined fingers. A shaky breath escaped your lips as your mind replayed the phone call with your mother before you recounted the events to Emma.

Your composure cracked with every passing word you told your roommate about your grandma's declining health.Your vision blurred, but you were unsure if it were tears forming on your lower lashes or if the fatigue caught up to you. All you knew for sure was that your head kept spinning.

“I am so sorry your family is going through this” Emma spoke tenderly, her strict face morphing into a look of worry and guilt. Her warm palm engulfed your hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. You didn't even realize you were shaking before Emma held your hand, the warmth of her body seemingly calming you down “You are so strong for persevering. You, your mother and your grandma”

Humorlessly chuckling, you retorted as you finally lifted your head to meet Emma's worried face “I'm not exactly sure my gran is persevering. It looks more like she's actively trying to die”

“Hey, don't say that” the blonde knitted her eyebrows together “She is grieving the loss of her husband. They've been together for 50 years-”

“62”

“See? 62 years together is a long time. I highly doubt she stayed with him for 62 whole years if your grandmother wasn't in love with your grandfather” Emma softly added “You need to be more understanding. She didn't just lose her husband, but the love of her life”

A solemn expression grew on your face as you fully registered what Emma had told you. You finally squeezed her hand back “You are right, I should be more tactful. I guess I was just too tired and frustrated on my mom's behalf”

Emma nodded “I completely understand where you're coming from, but all I wanna say is that you should understand where your grandmother's pain comes from” she paused before she offered “If you need help with anything, I would love to lend you a helping hand. You don't have to go through this alone”

“Yeah” you replied, voice hoarse and quiet “I could use some help packing my suitcase”

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

You managed to get three hours of sleep before Emma and her brother dropped you off at the train station. Since neither of you owned a car, Emma called Mikey and asked him to drive you two. You insisted that you could have just walked there, not wanting to cause your roommate any more inconvenience since she was the one who quietly packed your suitcase while you slept on the couch. Truthfully, you didn't even remember falling asleep on the uncomfortable cushions of your old couch.

“You must have been incredibly tired judging by the way you knocked out” was the only explanation Emma could offer upon your awakening. You could barely sit up straight, groaning as you felt a sharp pain in your back. It was safe to say your sleep was anything but restful; In fact, you somehow felt more tired after your nap.

Everything felt like a blur to you - from Emma hastily waking you up, to you getting ready and Mikey and Emma dropping you off at the train station. Hell, you barely remembered even getting the ticket to train and getting in your designated seat. All you do remember was the reassuring hand squeeze Emma gave you “Be sure to call when you arrive at your grandma's, ok?”

“Ok” you reassured her before giving her one last hug. You pulled the blonde woman tightly against your body, basking in her familiar warmth. Leaving your big city life and your best friend for four weeks seemed daunting to you. You were already somewhat familiar with your grandmother's village, having spent every summer up until you turned 14 in her small cottage in the middle of the forest, and having had to visit for your late grandfather's funeral. While you appreciated the many memories you have from there, you just couldn't shake the gnawing feeling off your chest that you would much rather stay.

Dreading the long ride and possible delays, you get i side, waving Emma and her brother goodbye one last time before your train took off.

The seat on the train wasn’t much more comfortable than your couch back at home. Your muscles were aching, your head throbbed unbearably and you struggled to stay awake throughout the ride, but persevered with the help of the aspirin pills Emma had shoved into your hands before you left in your dreaded voyage. The train ride wasn't easy, having had to switch trains, some of which had either been delayed or completely canceled, leaving you to run to catch the substitute trains. To say you were exhausted when you boarded your last train was an understatement. You yearned for your bed the way you have never before; not even the all nighters you frequently pulled wore you down as much as traveling to your grandma’s village. The perspective of sleeping in the guest bedroom after a nice hot bath seemed to be your lifeline, your sole motivator to suck up the agonizing slow pace your train went by.

That was until you heard footsteps coming towards your seat.

Slow, calculating steps tapping on the metal floor, silent like a stalking predator nearing itself towards its prey. It was like a switch inside you got turned on as you felt someone stride towards you. Immediately, every trace of tiredness vanished from you, replaced with the same deep-rooted fright you felt when you left your hometown. The fight or flight instinct kicked in, but you remained grounded in your seat. A swift glance to your window showed you the pitch black sky, only illuminated by a crescent moon and a handful of stars. You didn't see any lights from any cities or towns the train rode by, meaning you weren't too far away from your grandmother’s village. Yet, this revelation didn't seem to calm your racing heart. You were still alone in a train with a stranger with no way out and no one to save you.

You forced yourself to breathe evenly and slowly. Breathe in. Breathe out. Despite your instincts telling you to run and hide, you tried to rationalize the sudden appearance of a total stranger to your otherwise empty wagon. Perhaps they just boarded the train? Maybe it's an employee wanting to see your ticket? Or maybe you were hearing things due to sleep deprivation?

The fear lingered, constricting your throat like a conniving snake ready to swallow you in one bite. You gulped hard, trying to force the tight feeling in your throat to disappear,your back straightening as the steps grew closer and closer until a man sat on the seat on the same row you sat. No reasonable explanation entered your mind for him to sit an arm's reach away from you when he could have easily sat on a seat on the opposite end of the wagon.

Maybe if you'd just ignore the stranger next to you, you could act unbothered and continue your train ride relatively peacefully. But despite your better judgment, curiosity soon fell over you. The gnawing question of who would go out of their way to sit near you when the train offered an abundance of untaken seats wouldn't leave your mind, so you allowed yourself to discreetly peek at the stranger. To make sure they're no harm, you rationalized with yourself. From the corner of your eyes you were able to get a good glimpse of the person: A tall man dressed in dark clothes and long black hair, back leaned against the backrest and legs spread wide apart in perhaps the most stereotypical manspread you have ever seen. His head was facing downwards, his big hands silently typing on his smartphone. The long hair cascaded down to his shoulders, making it impossible for you to see his face. Overall, the stranger didn't seem to mind your presence too much, as he paid you no attention whatsoever.

A sigh of relief escaped your lips. You worked yourself up over nothing.

Your muscles relaxed when you were able to finally lean back to your seat instead of upholding your stiff, straight backed posture. Taking a quick glance at your phone confirmed you were just eight minutes away from reaching your destination, a fact that managed to calm your racing heart. Surely, nothing would happen in those eight more minutes? If he wanted to do something, the stranger would have by now.

“Didn't mean to scare you like that” a deep, masculine voice broke the silence. Startled, your head snapped towards the direction the voice came from, and unsurprisingly, you met the gaze of the stranger. Your heart thumbed as you took in his appearance, finally being able to get a clearer view on him. Narrowed, brown eyes stared back at you in what you could only describe as intrigue. Staring back at him with equal curiosity, you noted his sharp jawline and olive skin, eyes scanning his every feature. You would be lying to yourself if you said he was unattractive. He was quite the eye candy you found. From his rugged, wild look to his long fingers adorned with silver rings and his strong looking veiny hands, he was right up your alley. A tapping sound brought you back into reality, and soon, you realized it was him tapping his finger methodically against his arm rest. His bushy brows were slightly furrowed, his lips remained sealed as if awaiting your reply. The realization that you've been staring at the ravenette and fantasized about him sunk in. Blood rushed to your face, and heat spread all over your body as an overwhelming wave of embarrassment crashed over you.

“Ah, don't worry about it” was all you could muster up along with a dry laugh as a reply “I guess it's just been a long day” you added silently, more so to yourself rather than him, with an averted gaze to your phone. Barely a minute has passed since you laid eyes on the strange man, and yet you were already making yourself look like a creep. Your tired brain could handle only so much stress and adrenaline.

He remained silent, eyes trained on your sheepish self before a low hum escaped his throat “Sounds tough” Awkward silence fell over you as the stranger responded nonchalantly. You suppressed the urge to slap yourself over, having missed the opportunity to talk to perhaps the hottest guy you have ever seen. A part of you wished he'd ask you about your day or what exactly made your day so hard, but rationally, you knew not to expect a stranger to care for your unfortunate voyage to your grandmother's village. Clearly, he didn't give a shit and just made somewhat polite small talk with you after scaring the daylight out of you.

Somehow, the nameless stranger seemed to have captivated you - so much so that you mustered up all of your courage to lift your gaze and look at him one more time. This time, you caught him staring at you, but it wasn't the slightly confused, concerned look his face bore just minutes ago. His gaze was intense, brown eyes staring right into the depths of your soul. A shiver ran down your spine, the primal urge to run and hide from earlier, making a grand return. The dark glint in his eyes left you feeling exposed, naked even, like a prey animal being seized by the predator. Your arms instinctually wrapped around your body, both as a form of comfort and giving yourself the illusion of being hidden from his watchful gaze.

The ravenette finally tore his gaze off of you, abruptly standing up and grabbing his belongings “This is my stop” he gruffly told you, the baritone of his voice ringing in your ears like the melody of a new favorite song. You watched him leave the wagon you briefly shared with him first, no other words exchanged as he left you alone. You were almost disappointed. No goodbye, no explanation towards his strange act, and worst of all, you didn't catch his name.

An exasperated sigh left your lips, your fingers ran through your hair as you recounted the events of the last few minutes to yourself. Carefully standing up, you too stood up to grab your suitcase and the warm winter jacket you brought with you. Your back and ass hurt from the hard seat you sat on over the excruciatingly long voyage, muscles relaxing after a few well needed stretches. As you walked out of the train into the cold and dark, you were left to wonder if you would see the stranger from the train again.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧

You weren't awoken by loud car honking or the sirens of an ambulance rushing down the busy streets of your neighborhood - not that it would have bothered you. Having lived in your big city for years now, no sound nor music was too loud for you to lose sleep over - except for Emma's scolding when Mikey was visiting to hang out. Lucky For you, you didn't hear the blonde's loud voice first thing in the morning today. You barely opened your eyes, and you already felt a weight on your chest and a rough tongue lick your nose ever so lovingly. A smile curled your lips at the sight of the orange feline snugly sitting on top of you, purring softly as she successfully woke you up. “Morning little tiger” you chuckled, reaching to pet her little head. The cat contently closed her eyes, lifting her head to meet your hand halfway and leaning into the warmth of your skin. You gave her a few more pats before you gently lifted her off your chest and sat her down on your bed so you could sit up and get handy.

Your eyes wandered around the room, taking in the simple white wallpaper and the dark wooded furniture – your bed, a drawer next to your bed, a wardrobe with a mirror, a tiny table and a simple chair with a pale pink cushion on top, presumably to sit comfortably on the otherwise hard chair. The sheets you slept in were white with small floral detailing, matching your two pillows. A fond smile spread on your lips as you realized these were the same sheets your grandmother would hand you when you slept over at her house. The familiarity of them brought you comfort.

Your hand reached to your night stand, grabbing your phone to check the time. 12.34 pm. It wasn't usual for you to sleep through the better half of the day, your assignments, essays and exams forcing you to follow a very strict regime. Usually, you would have woken up hours ago and been at the library to revisit course work. But you weren't at home. You were far away in a village tucked away in a dense forest, and the academic responsibilities are haunting you no more.

Three new messages caught your attention. Emma.

Did you arrive yet? How are you holding up?

Hello??? Were you kidnapped or something or why are you not replying to me?? ( •̀ - •́ )

Honey, I know it's late, but I hope you've arrived safely and are snuggly asleep (っ˕ -｡)ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

Your fingers swiftly typed out a response to the worried blonde, telling her about your long and taxing train ride and having slept more than eight hours - which you knew she would appreciate. You left out the strange encounter with the man on your last train, debating on whether or not it would make her worry more. In the end, you decided to leave him out. For now, you thought to yourself, thoughts drifting to the handsome ravenette. You swore to yourself you would tell your best friend about him if you'd get the chance to see him again. Considering he got out on the same stop as you did, you are almost certain you would see him again sooner or later, as the village your grandmother lived in was small. It would be a miracle if you didn't see him again.

A silent knock to the wooden door pulled you back to reality. The door opened, the old handles creaking at the push, revealing your mother. The older woman stepped in and smiled as soon as she saw you. “Morning sleepyhead” her cherry voice greeted you while she walked towards you and sat down at the end of your bed.”How did you sleep?” Her attention quickly shifted to the orange feline laying by your side “I see Marigold woke you up, huh?” she reached to pet the feline's cat, chuckling at the soft purrs that vibrated from the feline. Marigold, oftentimes lovingly referred to as “Goldie”, was your grandmother's cat. Despite being an orange cat, she didn't wreak havoc, instead preferring to nap on the soft cushions of the kitchen chairs, especially when your grandmother is preparing afternoon tea. Though, you recall that the feline became mild mannered with age, as your childhood memories painted a completely different story. You recalled her being a feisty kitten, hissing and scratching at you when you and your grandmother found her under the stairs.

“I slept like a rock” you replied back, stretching your arms above your head and hearing your spine crack.You never really told your mother that the cost of your academic devotion was a healthy sleep schedule, so you refrained from telling her that last night's sleep was the best – and longest – you have slept in over a year. And I have it good, you detected. If it wasn't for Emma's cooking skills and shoulder to cry on, you would have been an easily irritable, hungry, sleep deprived mess. The thought of Emma's food made your stomach growl.

“Oh, I can tell” The older woman's eyes roamed your features, glad to see you so relaxed. “You barely stumbled out of the train last night. I can't blame you though, traveling for an entire day isn't for the faint of heart”. It was true. Yesterday's stress took you out completely – so much so you didn't remember the events leading up to and after meeting the stranger on the train. All you can remember are his deep brown eyes piercing through your soul.

“You missed breakfast and our lunch will still need some time to finish cooking, but I saved you some of grandma's freshly baked bread” your mother chuckled, swinging her left leg over her right leg as she made herself more comfortable on your bed “She's been more active ever since she found out you'd come to visit her” Conflicting feelings overcame you. On one hand, you felt like a terrible grandchild for not having come any sooner. On the other hand, you were relieved to find out your mere presence made your grandmother feel better. Thoughts of persuading her to take her health swirled in your head, already planning on how to get her to seek out a trained specialist. This revelation, however, hinted at something of far greater importance: if she can move around and bake bread in the morning just for you, maybe her physical health wasn't declining . Maybe she has no serious life altering illness like you have thought prior.

“Well, I'm glad to hear she is doing better” you hummed “When are you leaving to go home?”

“I'm leaving right after lunch. Can't miss out on your grandmother's stew” Grandma’s stew, the single best thing you have ever put in your mouth. Your stomach grumbled again at the mention of the stew, memories of greedily eating the dish with a large wooden spoon carved by your grandfather resurfaced in your mind. Quickly tossing your blanket to the side, you slipped out of the warmth and comfort of your bed, naked feet standing on the creme colored rug. “God mom, now I'm actually starving. You sure there's nothing left of breakfast for me?” Your mother paused, eyes squinting as she thought of your request “I'm sure I saw some packaged noodles in her pantry. And eggs, if memory serves me right” raising a brow at your mother, you retorted “Packaged noodles? Like instant noodles? Since when is grandma eating that stuff?” Your mother nodded along, brows knitted in confusion “I'm not entirely sure either, but I guess your grandma came to embrace at least a semblance modernity”

You didn't press any further, unsure if this was truly the answer to your grandmother's change in diet.”Yeah, I guess that makes sense” Slowly nodding, you turned around to to walk out the bedroom, putting on wine red slippers before you opened the dark wooden door “I'm going to make myself something to eat. Do you wanna come down to the kitchen with me?” “I'll quickly call your dad and join you in the kitchen”

You left your designated bedroom, shivering as you stepped into the cold hallway. Maybe walking out in nothing but a simple nightgown was not a smart idea, but you already stepped out of the bedroom, and you didn't feel like intruding on your mother's call. She can be such a sap. You smiled to yourself, remembering the sickly sweet way she would talk to your father. I'd rather not overhear any of that, you concluded, deciding to tough out the cold for a little while until you'd get to the kitchen.

You walked down the stairs, the wood creaking softly under your feet with every step you took. This house was old, having been built by your grandfather's father almost a century ago. Every brick and every nail belonged to your family history. What an odd thought, you thought as you passed the family old pictures of people you have never met hanging on the walls. The black and white pictures were framed in gold, the faces familiar, yet strange. You remembered admiring them when you were just a child, wondering what the stories of these people were. As time passed, you'd start to wonder if one day, you would end up next to them, a vibrant, colorful picture of you next to the grey and brown ones of your ancestors.

The endless halls of your grandmother's home finally lead you to your destination. The door was wide open, inviting you to step inside and eat to your heart's content. You entered to see the kitchen of your childhood frozen in time. The large table still stood in the center with the same white lace tablecloth, your grandmother still kept her porcelain plates and dishes in the glass cabinet, and upon further inspection, even the drawing you gifted her ages ago hung on the fridge. Some things really never change.

Walking straight to the pantry, you had to satiate your curiosity before you could even think of stilling your hunger. There was no way your grandmother – an elderly woman who swore on home cooked meals, homemade remedies, and grew her own vegetables and fruit – would ever willingly buy instant ramen. It sounded so ridiculous to you, so unfathomable, that the same woman who would even refuse to buy you candy and instead offer you jars of various fruit compotes, would all of a sudden abandon her moral standing on processed and stored bought food out of convenience. Yet there it was, between rice and pasta, you found the package of instant soba. Grabbing the plastic package, you carefully inspected it to make sure you weren't hallucinating. “Peyoung Yakisoba” you read out loud. Baffled at your discovery, you remained silent, carefully reading through the ingredients’ list.

Heavy footsteps rippled through the silence. There she is, you figured it would be your grandmother walking towards you considering your mother had a habit of announcing her entrance. The footsteps grew closer and stopped, your grandmother must be close to the kitchen. “Gran, you shouldn't be eating this stuff” you lectured, your back still facing her and your eyes skimming over the nutritional label. “The amount of sodium in this pack is crazy. That can't be healthy for you” “Oh how thoughtful”

You inhaled sharply as a deep male voice responded to you back. Swiftly turning around, you were met with a tall man leaning against the door frame, arms crossed in front of his body, his sharp eyes watching your every move. You had already recognized him by his voice, the deep rasp of his tone haunting you to the core. Before, you stood none other than the stranger you met in the train yesterday, but this time, you got an even better look at him. The ravenette looked even more handsome during daylight you found, mesmerized by the silky long hair and the tattoos peeking under the collar and sleeves of his navy hoodie. The same silver rings as last night adorned his fingers, and with the way you studied them his hands last night, you were almost certain you'd recognize them among a thousand pairs. This time, however, you were able to rip yourself gaze off of him on your own with having him snap you out of your trance like state. He had this effect on you, and you deeply loathed it.

“Who are you, and what are you doing here?” you pressed, forcing your voice to remain steady. The man wasn't impressed with your faux display of confidence and instead let his eyes roam over your body. You wanted to hide your body from his gaze, regretting not having thrown on at least a robe over your short nightgown. There was little to be left for his imagination, as your gown was barely hiding anything: your legs, neck, cleavage and shoulders were exposed to him, the fit accentuated the shape of your hips and chest as well. You might as well have stood naked in front of him, it wouldn't have made a big difference to you as the skimpy cloth couldn't shield you from him. His brown eyes finally traveled up to your face. The expression on his face remained unreadable, though you swore you spotted a light furrowed on his brows. You were about to repeat your question louder this time and demand answers, until he spoke up first. “‘m not here for you” he expressed unenthusiastically, although the way he licked his lips made you think otherwise.

He stepped away from the door frame, straightening his back as soon as you heard another pair of footsteps coming towards the kitchen. Dreading washed over you. You weren't ready for a second intruder. Bracing yourself on what comes next, your mind went into a frenzied survival state, ready to grab the nearest objects and throw them at the home invaders.

But no big, strong, scary looking man showed up. Instead, your grandmother tapped her way into the kitchen entrance with her walking stick. “Oh, goodness gracious, what are you wearing?” her mouth fell agape when she saw your skimpy nightgown, nudging the strange man into his ribs. “Keisuke, do not look! This is improper!” Even more questions arose inside your head when the stranger – Keisuke – obeyed and averted his gaze from you wordlessly. Who is he? Why is he here? How does grandma know him? Why is he always checking you out? Those were the questions you knew you would be demanding answers for.

You watched the man whose eyes roamed your form shamelessly avoid eye contact with you after your grandmother entered the scene. Eyebrows knitted in confusion at the absurd turn of events, you tried to make sense of what had just happened, not noticing your grandmother hastily walking over to you. You only snapped out when you felt the handle of the wooden walking stick poking your side. “Do not stand here like you're a statue. Go! Get dressed! You can't be walking around half naked when a man is around!” she demanded, each poke becoming increasingly more aggressive. Heat rushed to your face as you nodded your head bashfully at the elderly woman before you headed out of the kitchen. Your shoulder lightly bumped into the ravenette when you walked out “Sorry” you mumbled out to him, being careful so your grandmother wouldn't hear you talk to him. After all, you really didn't want to invoke her anger one more time. Without even looking at you, the ravenette clicked his tongue at you “Yeah, you better be. She's gon’ lecture us as soon as you come back” he grumbled back. You wordlessly left, walking up the stairs to your bedroom as silently as you could.

Upon opening the wooden door, you discovered that your mother had left your bedroom, leaving only a sleeping Marigold on your bed. Thankfully. You would need the silence to fully comprehend what had just transpired and to pick out an outfit that would be up to your grandmother's liking. This will be a long day.

#♱ 𝐑𝐔𝐍 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐌𝐄 #tr baji #baji #baji x reader #baji x you #baji x y/n #tr x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers baji #tokrev x reader #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers baji x reader #baji keisuke #baji keisuke x reader #mdni banner by cafekitsune

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onyourhyuck · 1 year ago

Text

Animal Instinct. | NCT SERIES

Title: CHAPTER 1 ‘The Untamed.’

— Prologue: “When the sun sets meet me at my apartment, if you dare.”

— Summary: You are a marine biologist. You should be able to understand animals and their way of living. When you encounter a new society in a bar under the name ‘Sour Grapes’ you find yourself in a troubling situation with seven different men. Seven different animals.

— Genre: Smut with plot. Minors dni. Fantasy with modern timeline. Female!reader. Secondary genders (but with animals) dreamies are complete red flags. Dub-con. Everything is very dark romance related. Nothing here is for the weak. Everything is just pure filth. It gets progressively worse and worse. Multiple orgasms. Overstimulation. Pet names such as ‘my pretty whore’ or ‘princess’ — minor hair pulling, Fingering (female receiving). Creampie, cumming inside / no protection please use a condom.

— Notes: I APOLOGISE FOR TAKING SO LONG. BUT HERE IT IS. MORE FREQUENT UPDATES COMING UP.

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One thing you love about yourself is that your work basically shapes your entire routine. You love walking inside your laboratory seeing the animals in the tanks you have to take care of and examine. This included various important research that no one should know. It is highly top secret. A simple leak of what you collect samples from the sea or other animal biology from biomes and journals you keep could really be a mess for you.

Working on separating the two and three sides of the samples you have listed from the deep oceans all throughout different sights. You felt a hand approaching behind you quickly.

The man taps your shoulders when you’re so busy working with the test tubes. “Hey Y/n mind giving me—” you jump and turn around with a fright.

“Seriously Johnny! I told you not to sneak up on me like this. Especially when I’m working with these highly reactive test tubes.” You scowled at your coworker, Johnny Suh. He was one of your friends and coworkers. Wearing a white cloak and round black glasses on.

He was a handsome fella. Very charming and handsome you have to admit it. Johnny can be professional but he could also be quite a mood maker in such a serious profession.

Laughing at your unusual behaviour, you’re never this jumpy when you are working but he probably assumes he scared you to death. “What got you so anxious Y/n? You never get scared when i do this.” Johnny raised an eyebrow. He swore he could see your own soul leave your body.

Truth be honest ever since that night with Ningning all you are thinking about how your entire life has been a lie. Sour Grape’s has taken your mind over. No. Mark has taken your entire mind off and away from your daily routines. Everyday you’re thinking about ‘How can this be possible?’ Humans coming from other animals and not just monkeys. It’s insane information. You shouldn’t be believing this but when Jaehyun said it’s a secret; it makes you think there must be some truth to it.

No one on earth would make up such a stupid fairytale on the spot.

If you weren’t a marine biologist with side degrees of zoology you’re just the type of person to not let this slide. You want to learn more.

You want to experience the truth. You want to see if it’s the truth if they actually are who they are setting themselves to be.

Letting out soft mumbles as you close off the testing tubes, afterwards putting the collective tubes in the stirring device. “I haven’t slept well for the past few days. Sorry if i seem like I’m on the edge.”

He gave you a soft smirk leaning on the side of the table while watching you. “Oh honey you seem like you’re more than on the edge. You’re off the edge.” Your eyes make eye contact after you were done with your tasks.

Your friend trails now questioning you as you’re looking at him with a soft look that made your thoughts even worse.

“What’s on your mind, Y/n?” Johnny asked with a small smile. You shake your head, you don’t want to share something so crazy. He might think you’re actually insane, or worse, he might even think you lost your entire marbles.

“Nothing serious, John. Let’s just finish up and go home. I’m tired.” You excused yourself from the conversation to finish up. The only thing you want to do today is figure out what to eat for dinner.

Walking down the street to your favourite food truck, you decided to take your mind off whatever you were thinking for the past week or so.

You felt like your brain was just constantly going back to the same topic and it was draining truth be honest. What better way to distract yourself than to eat your favourite stir fry noddles?

Being a local customer the food truck owner gives you discounts nowadays because you were a customer for a long time. A regular at that.

“Hey I would like the usual.” You gave a smile at the owner who nodded seemingly being happy to seeing you drop by.

“I was beginning to think you’d never return, Y/n.” Said the truck owner and you gave a little smirk. “How could I not return? You make the best noodles.” Complimenting them they blushed and started making the noodles for you.

But then something flashed behind you at a fast pace. You didn’t even realise it until the figure stood overshadowed by their body remaining still as a statue.

Gawking at the menu on the side. Your eyes widen when you turned around with disbelief flashing over your lips and cheeks.

“Young man what would you like?” The owner interrupts your own lingering thoughts of shock. The voice, the sound of his breathing, everything else made you feel so small and in danger just by the presence alone of this man.

He looks back from the menu. “The original stir fry m’am.”

You did not realise you were literally staring Mark down in this moment until his face turned over to you and you quickly looked away biting your bottom lip, staring at your very own feet on the ground. You can’t believe it that Mark and you crossed paths when all you’ve been saying is how you’re going to distract yourself finally!

What was this coincidence? Fate? Destiny?

There was this expression on his face that falters when he finally acknowledges your existence. It’s like he met you before but he was trying to find out from where.

And then it hits him. You were the one with Jaehyun that one night.

The dark tone of voice strikes you like a knife behind your back if anything. “You’re that girl at the bar that one time.” Mark said to you, turning to look at you fully with his entire body now facing you.

You definitely caught the predator’s attention now with how easy you’re to read. God you hate being so readable like an open book — a very non interesting book at that.

You fake a smile, maybe if you just pretend you don’t know him he will give up speaking to you. “Oh no, I don’t attend bars. I’m… allergic to alcohol.” You cringe deep inside when you made up the most stupid excuse.

Really? Allergy? He didn’t even ask about your allergies.

Mark frowns which lead you to believe he wasn’t completely swayed by your own actions right now. You forget how much of animal instincts he must have by now. You can’t fool a tiger easily.

“You must’ve mixed me up with someone else.” You said quietly trying to make it seem more and more believable if you just keep talking.

Thankfully you were praying for your meal to arrive first beforehand he got his. The prayer was answered when you grab your plastic container smiling and thanking them. You literally dashed away but why try to run away?

Trying to out run one of the most dangerous cats you probably made the worst mistake to even show a hint of speed in your movements.

When you were to reach your destination to your car the same black towering figure stands over you. In front of you with a dark gaze.

You let out a mini gasp to be honest, you feel like your heart is being crushed by two large walls that keep on moving forward and forward until your heart and lungs collapse.

Mark sighs. “You know that I can hear your beating heart when you lie?” He said rather amused but also it was eerily like a reminiscing threat thrown at you. You stand there quivering, trembling even, and it made Mark so much more entertained than he thought he would be.

He took a step forward. The stir fry plastic box was shaking in very discreet manner in your hands. Each step he takes you took three steps backwards.

This was a new cat and mouse game you didn’t want to be playing with him at all.

“Y/n was it? Jaehyun mentioned you.” Mark said with a little more confidence now that he actually had you cornered. Now you cannot lie on the spot and try to run away from him.

It’s ridiculous. He looks and was human but in reality he’s not just entirely human is he? He’s a freaking tiger with probably the most define genetics. It’s crazy to you.

You mumble trying to get away still. There was just this instinct inside you to make excuses until you can’t anymore. “Sorry i have to go, i am extremely busy.”

Your heartbeat picked up again, Mark sighs pressing an arm around your body and now moved you to sit down at a bench in the scene. You flinch and he forced you to sit down in front of him with his dark eyes watching you. “Another lie. You must enjoy lying a lot don’t you?”

You look away. You’re watching anything but him. “What do you want from me? I swear I don’t… I don’t know anything.” You’re trying your best to make this situation just deescalate.

He grinned amused. “Well that’s also a lie.” He said sitting down next to you on the bench as your heart was racing incredibly fast. Mark thought you might die on the spot if you keep stressing yourself out.

You took a little breath when he sat down next to you which seemed a little less nerve wrecking.

Eventually your heart calmed down when the silence overtook you both. Mark makes a quick glance over at you again, and he continues to speak when he waited for your nerves to sort themselves out.

You sigh. “I didn’t know you liked this place.” You tried to make a conversation as well but you weren’t sure how well he will respond to it.

Heck you don’t know this guy at all.

“I like it. I’m a regular here.” Mark said with a smirk and he moves a bit closer to you now, he opens up his plastic box of stir fry and starts to eat it with the plastic fork you’d get at a restaurant or other food trucks.

You saw him eating and you slowly shift to open your stir fry. But to be honest you’re too scared to even eat in front of him. You’re trying to act normal though. So you take a piece and ate slowly your own food along with Mark. The man kept watching you even though he ate. But you’re avoiding to even acknowledge him so much.

“Y/n do i scare you?” He was quite blunt and upfront. You flinched when he mentions the exact words you’re feeling.

You awkwardly chuckle and put down the fork. “Is it that obvious?”

Mark scoffs a bit. “You didn’t try to hide it.” He leans away and ate some more, you felt a bit less scared and now more guilty. Now that you think about it he seems like a normal guy now.

“Sorry. What Jaehyun said to me that night at the bar messed with my brain.” You admit it, which made the man next to you smirk. “You know I’m human as well. But I do admit it was fun seeing you trembling.” There was a sense of eeriness in his words but at the same time you were watching him.

He admitted to you that watching you embarrass yourself in front of him was a thrilling show but you decided to just not respond to it.

You didn’t even know what to say back anyways.

“So… are you actually…” your voice trails off unable to think of how to say this. How do you even phrase this?

Mark saw your expression like it was the most readable thing he has ever laid eyes on. He leans forward putting the plastic box down. “Part Tiger?” He spoke those words right out of your throat. You bite your inner cheek nodding.

“Is it true?” You asked with your eyes widen.

He grinned and stands up, putting hands in the front jean pockets he then turns around to you rather amused by your curiosity.

Has no one ever told you that curiosity killed the cat? You’re like a small, tiny cat who can’t keep their nose out of something that wasn’t their business.

It felt rather authentic for you though. Most people are just nosey but you seem to be curious because you want to discover something new.

And that is exactly what Mark likes about you. Your intentions are something he hasn’t seen before. Leaning forward he writes something on the paper and passed it to you, with the same hand you saw the large metal ring with the tiger engraved on it. Grabbing the piece of paper you look cautiously from the paper towards Mark’s dark gaze.

“When the sun sets meet me at my apartment, if you dare.” He said to you simply.

Just like a tiger he caught you by surprise with how sharp his tone of voice was full of silky seriousness. And then he disappeared into thin air as well. You only looked away for a second just for Mark to be gone in front of you.

Leaving you questioning if you should take the bait and go to his apartment even though that sounds like some kind of messed up plan.

For once you were dreading the sun setting. Getting out of your car you look back at the paper in your hand and then your eyes fall back on the complex building in the front.

The address that brought you to this place makes you both anxious and excited. You have many running thoughts on your journey going inside. Every single muscle contraction meant you were growing close and closer to danger.

Slipping your hand over the doorknob you didn’t even knock, the door opened up with the man revealing in front of you.

Mark heard you from a mile away. He knew you’d come and he was right when you stood in front of him with a stunned look.

You really do make him feel like he’s hunting you down.

“Come on in Y/n, I don’t bite.” Mark smirked seeing your hesitation as your eyes peek inside the apartment before your whole body walks in. Mark closed the door after you fully enter.

There was a lack of trust between you two but for some you are wanting to trust this man. You don’t know why but you know one thing for sure; he has bland furniture. All neutral colours and very modern in his apartment.

You tread carefully and put your purse bag down on the couch nearby as you stand in middle of his apartment. Your gaze follows where Mark was on the wall leaning one side of his shoulders on it, the muscular arms crossed together and the lower body curved towards the right side.

Breathing hitching you feel it becoming a round ball in your throat. “So Mark will you admit that what I know is true?”

You came for the truth only. But to Mark he wanted more from you than just to give you a simple truth. He wanted to take a taste of something much better than any truth could provide him or to you.

The body slips off the wall approaching you slowly while his gaze was rather intense and playful while watching you.

“I don’t think I can prove anything verbally to you.” Mark whispers gaining a closer look at your face and the natural scent of your body blending in with the morning coffee you drank as well as your floral perfume; creating this intoxicating sensation in the nasal passages. Mark could crawl to you just by the smell of your own skin.

Hands slowly moving to your waist pulling you closer by an inch your feet trotting forward in little steps towards his body. “But I can show you how a tiger has it’s fun?” He smirks brushing the hot breath escaping from his mouth down to your neckline, while his large eyes are watching you keenly to see your reaction for approval.

Goosebumps evoked on your skin when the tiniest touch of his fingers kneading on your waist bringing you closer to him made you fall into this trance; a trap in other words you’re not escaping a primal animal’s desire at all.

He lifts his head only a little, waiting for your lips to give him consent or a sign of any sorts. But you seemed to stunned and even timid.

The reasoning of you coming to his apartment wasn’t to sleep with him. But the idea of sleeping with someone as magnetic and attractive as him clouds your judgemental. You’re a smart woman you know that and even Mark knows it; you know your stuff. But you certainly look tempted by the invitation.

The only thing you could think about was how badly you want to kiss his lips in that moment. Swiftly you press your hands up to his jawline and pull him in with a sudden kiss when your decision was made finally. Your sudden lips and the taste of them lingering in the air stunned the tiger but you soon felt his hands clawing at your hips lifting you up with his arm muscles — bringing forward your body against a nearby wall as your mouths clashed like two boulders in action. Fighting for something you would like to say is survival; survival of the fittest.

Grunting at the smallest thing, Mark enjoyed hearing them a lot, even the clawing he did down your back and to cup your round ass made you grind up against his body in a friction. Your reactions were what made Mark’s instincts going up the roof. The inner animal was raging from just how much you do this to him. You look ethereal and vulnerable.

Your tongues are tied like a knot together constantly trying to go back and forth only to end up pushing and pulsing instead. Your hair was a mess from just the heated makeout with the man who did not show you a signal mercy.

Running your hands through his hair was probably the most difficult thing for him. Mark’s sensitive area was always his hair and head in general.

You wonder if it’s because tigers in general have sensitive ears; in fact all cats have that trait. It just made your mind run free whenever your fingers cross over his hair. He always lets out soft noises between the heavy parting kisses with your red feverous mouth.

Deciding that the wall won’t be enough for him or for you in that matter. Mark lifted you again this time turning only a small swift left to the bedroom the door opens enough to keep you in and throw you on top of his bed. Watching your body sink on the mattress wasn’t as satisfying as your arms pulling him on top with your lips connecting again for another passionate kiss.

Your voice sounds like music to his ears, Mark could never get tired of hearing your own heart racing and pounding against your chest either. It might be his favourite sound afterall this time.

“Fuck — Mark, hold on.” You adjust yourself on the bed when his hands slipped over your shirt unbuttoned it down along with your lowering clothing slipping it to your ankles. Mark did not know a single vocabulary word about slowing down. He was an animal. Animals don’t wait they just do whatever they want. Whenever it suits them. Your words were pointless to Mark.

He gave you a look when your hands press on his biceps. You needed a moment to calm your heart otherwise you would feel like this whole moment will not be savoured enough.

Leaning in he gave you a gentle peck instead on your lips. Mark tried to slow down to your liking. Holding himself back was hard when you look like this in your underwear and bra only. With your skin on skin contact too.

“Please.” You whisper. “You really don’t hold back.” You chuckled a little bit. Mark grinned softly at your reaction.

Humming he slowly took off his shirt. “Didn’t Jaehyun already tell you?” He sighs and your gaze looks up at Mark when he mentioned another name. “I don’t settle down for anyone.” Mark mumbles connecting back to your close body again when the shirt fell down on the bedroom floor.

He doesn’t settle for anyone so there is no reason for Mark to slow down for anyone. Mark goes fast for everyone and everything.

Your eyes are glued together as one. Your heart skips a beat when Mark was simply staring at you but it felt like he was chasing you across the jungle if anything.

Seeing your stare he had a feeling you might be thinking about your second options. Mark pressed forward to you.

“You still have the option to leave sweetheart, because I won’t give you this choice afterwards anymore.” He slants his fingers down your forearms and your eyes lift up staring into his own deadly irises.

You breathily sigh. “No I don’t want to leave.” You tell him with a determined look and you press your lips on the side of his neck kissing down to his defined collarbones.

Mark chuckled at your amusing response. You don’t want to run away yet you’re the one who told him to slow down?

“Alright. Don’t blame me for what’s about to happen next.” Mark’s voice was dark and low, everything that had been attracting you to him all along. You couldn’t wait until Mark kissed you again, you’re craving for more and more.

You don’t even know what you’re craving; is it the dangerous thrill? Or is it the fact that there was this biological element that keeps your hormones growing more complex.

Whatever it was your thoughts shatter down like a glass on the ground shredded to pieces creating a map of what you’d call your scattering thoughts. The heat forming underneath the pawing motions of the hands threading your body like a needle, grabbing your perky breasts. Hearing out your grasps and manhandling you into the mattress to a position of what his desires are. You’re nothing more than a rag doll. In this scenario you didn’t know what else to think. You were caving for more.

Escaping grasps when the rough grain fingers rub down to your revealing womanhood. His yellow-ish sharp eyes glow by the excessive amount of excitement. Your insides were much mild to his fingers. But they manage to heat your insides up so much faster. When he pumps them up and down your eyes were trying to squeeze shut.

Mark didn’t want to look away from your precious eyes when he was pumping his fingers inside your pussy walls. He wanted to watch you cry out. To him if you weren’t shouting to the top of your lungs then he did not do a good job. And Mark values his ego and pride of pleasuring women he takes to bed. You need to have a good time, your pleasure means so much more than his own.

And that’s the type of man Mark is. He focuses on you as much as he can. There was a sense of addiction towards you. Mark loved smelling your increasing scent on his bedsheets that you’re sprawled across looking like a desperate prey begging for mercy, but deep down you want so much more. With those aching teary eyes Mark knew you were close to a climax.

But did his hands stop? No. Mark didn’t care if you’re close to cumming. Mark will make you cum thrice if he wants too.

By the next few minutes you’re not sure what’s happened but your mind was fogging out between the lines. The bed sheets were leaking by your juices and Mark’s hand and your pussy were only an inch away from one another. His fingers were so deeply embedded inside of you it’s causing your voice to come out like a strain meld.

“Oh fuck… fuck… Mark I think I came already.” You said the obvious not knowing that was his intention all along. To make you release so much you’re starting to lose train of consciousness.

The tiger smirks fondly by your answer. Mark stretching your pussy out so much just so you can be able to fit him later on.

Pulling out his fingers out of your hole he licks them across his plum lips while gaze on your eyes. There was not much space between you two; your breathes are touching.

“You taste so sweet, Y/n.” Mark deems it. Pulling apart the boxers fell on the bedroom floor and he pulled your ankles down so your legs are spread round the hips.

You’re gawking at the sight of his thick glory shown towards your face. You’re not sure what else to say because your expression said it all.

Mark sultry chuckles watching you was seriously amusing. You don’t try to hide your expression with your widen little eyes. “What is it? Did i leave you speechless already?”

Though it sounds cocky. Which it probably was. Mark had a good reasoning to sound like a complete womanising douche.

He was thick. Thicker than anything you’ve seen before. You’re unsure what to say but you cannot argue with him either. He did leave you speechless. It was embarrassing for you.

Mark took your token of silence so he leans his face closer to give you a peck on your lips. He whispers down to your shoulders aligning his face with it. In a way this was to comfort you.

“Don’t worry Y/n. We aren’t finished just yet.” Breathily into your skin Mark buried the nose on the collarbone as the shape of Mark enters your pussy walls this time it was stretched with a slight burning angle that caused your whole body to tremble by itself. Holding on to the bedsheets underneath your body you feel like you’re floating by how just the tip touching at your velvety skin you’re reacting so much to it. This wasn’t usual. You’ve not experienced something like that before.

It’s nothing like the previous times you’ve slept with a guy before. It’s nothing like that.

In this case it feels like you’re fighting for your life but at the same time you’re submitting to yourself knowing Mark was the powerful one here. The one in charge of the moment. The variable that will never change is Mark. In a sick twisted way you like this. You like becoming the prey. The way you’re underneath Mark as he is thrusting you like a wild in-domestic beast, it’s what you’ve been craving all this time. The thrill of it.

For once you’ve forgotten all about biology. You’ve became it instead. Maybe you’re starting to finally understand how it feels to be stepped on by someone stronger than you. For once in your life that is.

Mark couldn’t get enough of you however. It’s the way your dark hair is floating like strands of ribbons on his bed sheets that smell of you now. He knew that once you are finished it is mostly likely to return to normal life. You’ll probably never hear from him. Or he might never hear from you on that matter — but those bed sheets will have your lingering smell and he doesn’t think he will change them for a while. You’re addictive. Strangely Mark has never been this compatible before with just anyone.

It’s crazy how a simple “come to my apartment” leads to you actually having sex later on. But you didn’t care how easy it seemed. You were enjoying it far too much to worry about the consequences. Mark was far too lost between the creeks of your neckline and the collarbones, his thinly pressed tongue sucks across your beautiful canvas. Your moans are starting to resemble poetry to his ears. As if you were all he wants to listen to on hours end.

The tiger felt every inch of your insides clenching with awe around his shape. It was the way you wrap around so easily. Your arms do the same thing. They wrap around his body and cling onto him forever. Mark wouldn’t have it any other way.

Your eyes only part ajar like a door does only to see yellowish sparkles of phenomenal beauty spreading across the bedroom. Widening at the sight you felt like you’re hallucinating. But when you’ve looked at the man above you thrusting you seen exactly a pair of two golden Iris’ staring down at you with nothing behind those eyes but lust.

It felt as if every muscle in his body extended to his original position when Mark grunts the bottom lip pierced to his fangs. “Oh yes, keeping looking at me like that. Such a pretty whore you are.”

Cheeks grows out in awe when Mark brushed over his fingers into your hair only to press you even more into the mattress digging his clock so deep in your insides you’ve lost knowledge of how far you could last. By now it’s been far too long. Your body’s overdrive is now overheating like a computer would — yet Mark shows no sign of slowing.

Even the way his voice stood still like the sea breeze. You’re at a loss of words.

Pulling at your hair slightly Mark decided to make you sit up a little so he could rearrange the speed of his thrusts to become quicker and sharper. Which only made you gasp audibly loud when you’re held in this position for so long. Your brain begins to fog once again.

Mark groans besides your shoulders, carving his teeth marks all over your body. You’re starting to look like a butchered meat eaten alive by him.

His eyes shift close. “Fuck… that’s it… now take it all Y/n.” You’re starting to see some slowing down when Mark unleashed the folds between your pussy walls. You’re starting to give up the moment Mark leaves you to the brim; looking full and plum like he wanted you in the state.

Eutrophic state of being overdriven by an animal, was all you’re able to process.

Breathing heavily into your skin you’re closing your eyes only a little, but everytime you do that you wanted to drift off to sleep. Eventually you’re wondering if you are asleep because all you see is black with a faded out voice I’m the background calling your name all over again.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

By the morning you’re awaken by your own fine reflection of how much your body actually endured last night.

Your lips part away staring at the front. Teeth marks scattering from top to bottom. You look like a whole different person compared to when you stepped a foot into this apartment.

Your eyes dart around the bedroom putting on your clothes that were left on the floor. You had to make yourself presentable at least once in your life because right now — you feel and look completely out of place. Brushing your hands into your hair messily brushing it out any knots. Then you open the bedroom door and step out. You’re met with a smell of eggs frying in a pan.

Following the scent you’re now approaching the shoulders of a man. Short sleeve tight shirt on flexing out muscles while wearing an apron. You’re filled with some form of happiness when you see that food is being cooked.

You mumble with a groaning stomach already. “Morning. What are you cooking?”

The man turned around with a little smirk seeing you’re already dressed and awake. Mark was expecting you to be knocked out a little longer. At first he thought you died on him last night. You’ve suddenly out of nowhere blanked out. But it turns out you were due in need of much sleep.

Mark pressed the eggs out of the pan and onto the plates. Your eyes following where his muscular arms extend out the plate towards you. You took a seat down on the chair by the kitchen aisle counter. He pressed a smile.

“Eggs and some toast. It’s the best I can do.” Mark announces.

You smiled and grabbed a fork. “It’s fine I’d eat anything anyone makes me.” You wish you could’ve shut your mouth when you said that though, because you maybe held your expectations high for Mark. He cannot cook eggs for the love of God.

The smile drops on your face instantly and you clear your voice a little when you’re sending a gaze back at Mark. You take a bite of the half burnt — nearly black at the bottom scrambled eggs. How do you burn eggs? You’ve got no possible human explanation for this sorcery.

For someone who is made to be a perfect stone with no hard edges; Mark can’t cook.

You might of found Mark’s first flaw.

You trail off mumbling. “Maybe I should cook next time?” Nonetheless you eat it all without a complaint. But you had to jokingly point o it out to Mark. You’re an honest woman. You couldn’t lie to him. It might feed his delusional ego.

Mark scoffs a little and chuckles at the end. “Good idea, Y/n. I can handle the other eggs.” You nearly choked on your chewing. But before you could say anything to him he was walking out of the kitchen area with that giddy smirk on his face as if he’s proud for saying something as outrageous as that.

“I’ll be in the shower!” Mark announces without a care that you’re probably as red as an apple.

You shake your head in disbelief and trail off a little laugh. You have a feeling this might weirdly be the most calming morning you’ve had. You go back to eating your scrambled egg wondering what else you will expect…

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@onyourhyuck please refer from translating copyrighting and plagiarising my work thank you!! Reblog and Follow me for more smuts like this!!

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faeriichaii · 1 year ago

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Masterlist

A/N: This is my Masterlist filled with the stories I have written so far 💕 I will add other fandoms to my list soon but feel welcome to request anyone from lotr or hobbit🤭 I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoyed writing them!!

｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა Requests: Closed (For now <3) ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა Fluff: ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა Angst: ☂ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა Smut: ☆ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

The Fellowship:

How they realise their feelings: ♡

Aragorn:

Worthy Enough: ♡ Summary: Aragorn slowly begins to understand you and tries to find out even more about you

Legolas:

Softest Touch: ♡ Summary: After looking at the etheral elven prince, you have the urge to weave your fingers through his silken hair, leading to more than just simple hair braiding.

Music to my ears: ♡ Summary: A trip to the tavern results in you not just winning new fans over with your music, but also winning the heart of a certain elven prince.

Immunity: ♡ Summary: Being sick is not fun, especially when you see Legolas' panicked gaze at your condition, which seems to get worse as the days pass by.

Words like Poison: ☂♡ Summary: Your beloved prince is stressed and busy with his duties. So, when you approach him to try and lighten the mood, he lets his frustration out on you.

Braiding Together: ♡ Summary: You have always received compliments for your cute braids, so you decided to offer the hobbits to braid their hair. However, Legolas really doesn't understand, why you would do that.

Lily: ☂♡ Summary: Being a princess with a gruesome father as a king makes you only wish to run away. So you do and run directly into the arms of an ethereal prince

Blessing: ♡ Summary: The journey of the fellowship ended a long time ago and suddenly you receive the invitation of the prince to join him in Mirkwood, meeting his father. But how will Thranduil react to seeing his sons best friend being a dwarf and his betrothed being an Avari?

Sensitive: ♡☆ Summary: You knew that Legolas could endure quite a lot, but what you did not expect is his reaction to touching his pointy ears

Little Quirks: ♡ Summary: The elven prince for some reason couldn't stop staring at you, which in return made you confused and very curious, as to why his eyes were constantly following you around.

Stormy Patrol: ♡ Summary: Tauriel and you were out on patrol without Legolas. But a storm takes you by surprise, resulting in you getting lost in the dark forest.

Sunkissed: ♡ Summary: You have been in love with the elven prince since quite a time, but never told him about it. Your sister Arwen however, is determined to change the course of your relationship with Legolas.

Keep Quiet: ☆ Summary: You seem to have teased your husband Legolas a little too long during one important meeting, so he teaches you a lesson.

Thorin:

A Part From Home: ♡ Summary: Tagging along for an adventure with Gandalf, you didn't expect to run into people that remind you of your lost home.

Part of Your World: ♡ Summary: Little mermaid you finds various little trinkets and things in the waters around Erebor and you can't wait to share them with your s/o.

There's just Inches in between us: ☆♡ Summary: You were the princess of another kingdom, meant to marry none other than the dwarven King Thorin from the lonely mountain. You rarely get the chance to talk to him and decide to visit him the night before the wedding, asking him to give you some attention.

Symphony of Your Life: ♡ Summary: Thorin went to visit his old friend Bilbo in the Shire once more, without expecting to be enchanted by a melodic voice that fills not just his ears but also his heart.

Fading Light: ♡☂ Summary: Thorin and you, his daughter on your journey to Erebor. And also the journey of him as a single father watching his princess grow up.

Kili:

Hija de la Luna Series (warnings: none so far): Prologue; Chapter I

Part of Your World: ♡ Summary: Little mermaid you finds various little trinkets and things in the waters around Erebor and you can't wait to share them with your s/o.

My Treasure: ♡ Summary: You have been travelling the sea for years on your wonderful ship with your crew, so you are a bit curious, when you find a bunch of dwarves hiding away in fish barrels.

Feathers: ♡ Summary: Joining the company on their quest, you knew to expect possible danger on the way. What you did not expect are the feelings between you and the prince.

My Sweet Valentine: ♡ Summary: You spent your morning hours with the wonderful dwarf prince Kili

Braiding Lessons: ♡ Summary: You always knew dwarves had various beautiful braids, but how come Kili doesn't? So one night you decide to change that and help him out.

Fili:

Part of Your World: ♡ Summary: Little mermaid you finds various little trinkets and things in the waters around Erebor and you can't wait to share them with your s/o.

Thranduil:

Bookworm: ☆ Summary: Legolas let the secret of a restricted area in the library slip, which makes you of course very curious. So after deciding to enter the forbidden part, you get caught by none other than the elven king himself.

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lenoide · 1 year ago

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📁 MASTERLIST / MY WORKS 👤 Other profiles: AO3 | Discord | Wattpad

└ 📁[📚Multi-chapters][⏳Long read]

Season of Love

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨Toto x reader(fem team principal)][💘Romance][🥵Smut][😂Comedy][😪Drama][🏎F1 World/Races/Teams/Paddock][✍️WIP][⏳Long read]

Summary: One night on a pier in Monaco, while admiring the sea under the night skies, you tell Toto: "I came to the conclusion that love is simply not meant for me." That's the answer to a question you have been asking yourself for the longest time. But what if he proved you wrong? Author's note: This is a multichapter Toto Wolff x team principal reader fic set along a season of F1. It's a very immersive story full of drivers, team dynamics, races, mystery, and smut. You just bought the Williams team, but nobody really knows who you truly are. 📁 Masterlist: └📁 Dances with Wolff Arc I └📁 1 Engines on and hearts off └📁 2 Lights out, and away your feelings go └📁 3 Can you feel the traction? └📁 4 No brakes, just love └📁 5 Cold tires, warm heart └📁 6 Collision at Turn "Your Heart" └📁 The Color of Truth is Blue Arc └📁 7 Red flagsss └📁 8 Safety car needed └📁 The Sebaffäre Arc └📁 9 Laps of Truth └📁 10 Finding Our Grip └📁 11 Crashed Dreams └📁 Love Lies, Miss Normani Arc └📁 └📁 Dances with Wolff Arc II └📁 12 Refueling Love └📁 13 Uniting for the Win └📁 14 Sprint Finish └📁 15 Victory Lap

Chemtrails Over the Yacht Club Collection

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨 Toto x reader(fem service staff)][💘 Romance][🥵Smut][🎀 Age-gap][❤️‍🔥Daddy Kink][🛳Yacht Culture][✍️WIP][⏳Long read]

Summary: Toto Wolff is a name often mentioned at the Yacht Club, where you work after classes. For some reason, you have always pictured him as an old crank like the usual members, not this foxy man who arrives at the reception making your knees quiver. The entire staff goes frenetic as he, one of the Club's most important clients, chooses to spend his spring break there without previous notice. You pray to the Gods that you don't cross lines with him since your entire livehood depends on this job, and you really want to graduate college. 📁 Collection: └📁 1 Dark But Just A Game └📁 2 Breaking Up Slowly └📁 3 Not All Who Wander Are Lost └📁 4 Dance Till We Die └📁 5 White Dress └📁 6 Let Me Love You Like a Woman

Grand Prix Elite Academy

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨 Toto(professor) x reader(student, future F1 driver)][👨‍❤️‍👨Lewis x Seb][💘Romance][🥵Smut][🎀Age-gap][❤️‍🔥Wild parties][🏫College AU][🌈Queer/Fem Seb][✍️WIP][⏳Long read]

Summary: Your life turns 180 degrees after receiving your acceptance letter for the Grand Prix Elite Academy, the most exclusive and prestigious Formula One College, designed to shape the future drivers of the motorsport world. You will try to navigate your new life among the Monaco elites, survive the campus dynamics and rivalries between the faculties, and try to win this year's Elite Cup to beat an undefeated Mercedes, all while befriending your eclectic classmates, join the wild parties, have a couple of make-outs under the racing circuit benches, lose your v-card and get over that stupid crush you have on professor Toto. Will you make it alive to graduation? Race to Greatness! Author's note: This is a Formula One college AU fic set in an elite academy in Monaco, where the F1 Teams are Faculties, their Team Principals are professors, the FIA is the college board, and all the grid drivers are your classmates. You are accepted under a scholarship program called WomenOne and have lots to catch on to after years of putting your racing dreams on hold. Becoming the outcast new girl is always challenging, especially when all of you live on one campus. 📁 Masterlist: └📁 1 Hi, Society! └📁 2 Gone With The Wolff └📁 3 Know Your Frenemies └📁 4 The Kids Are Not Alright └📁 5 The Twat and the Furious └📁 6 Panic Roomate └📁 7 Easy Y/N └📁 8 War of the Rosbergs └📁 9 …Baby? One More Time! └📁 10 She Wolff

[📚One-shots]

I'll Be Home for Christmas

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨 Toto x reader][🥵Smut][❤️‍🔥Mild BDSM][👄Dom/Sub][🎄Christmas][💫Short read]

Summary: Toto asks you in between ravenous kisses if you truly want him, even with his busy schedule, fast-paced life, countless nights miles away, and his dominant trait, the one you love to be submissive to, by saying yes you didn't expect it to be this hard! This particular season felt eternal, and you only desire to have him back, wrapped as the world's most alluring Christmas gift on your bed if possible. └📁 One-shot

Sparks Fly

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨 Toto x reader][🥵Smut][❤️‍🔥Daddy Kink][🎆New Years][💫Short read]

Summary: Toto is ready to leave his shitty 2023 behind and start 2024 in the best way possible, and you don't want to spend another New Year's Eve all by yourself; it's like destiny and the universe conspired to bring you two together. └📁 One-shot

The Lonely Hearts Party

[👩‍❤️‍👨Toto(boss) x reader(fem merc employee)][💘Romance][😊Fluff] [😂Comedy][🗄Corporate Mercedes][💝Valentine's Day][⏳Long read]

Summary: For weeks now, you have been receiving the most gorgeous flowers every Wednesday morning at your desk at the Brackley Headquarters, as a mysterious admirer seems so in love with you. The entire factory, your besties at work, and you all wonder who he is. Could it be the one you truly wish for? └📁 One-shot

The Big Slip

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨Toto x reader (fem middle class artist)][💘Romance][🥵Smut][😪Drama][🕵️‍♂️Secret Identity][💸Social gap][🪐AU][⏳Long read]

Summary: Your life as a struggling arts graduate in Monaco, coming from a working-class family who lives on the outskirts, is about to change. Toto Wolff enters your life not only by giving you the best sex ever but also by making you love somebody for the first time. Arranged marriages, a horrible breakup, and an induced coma, plus his terrible parents, were a complete surprise. └📁 One-shot

The Speed Game of Love

[👩‍❤️‍👨Toto x reader(fem contestant)][💘Romance][😂Comedy][🪐AU][🤪Crack humor][🌈RuPaul's Drag Race][💫Short read]

Summary: Three fierce queens will race for your love, but only one will win your heart. Could it be the spicy Carla LaTurbo Slayz, the fierce Adore D. Hammer, or the queen of England herself, GiGi Reigns? Or maybe that sexy host could get some! Hosted by the hot and only Toto Wolff. └📁 One-shot

Daddy's Little Pet

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨 Toto x reader(journalist)][🥵Smut][❤️‍🔥Daddy Kink][🎀Size Kink][👄Power play][💫Short read]

Summary: You had come to Brackley expecting a generic interview, not a deep dive into Toto's lovemaking life. └📁 One-shot

[🚎Coming soon...][✍️WIPs]

Join us at The Wolff Pack Discord Server > https://discord.com/invite/tpgArxqbfd

It’s Murder on the Garagefloor

[👩‍❤️‍👨Toto (boss) x reader(fem Merc employee)][💘Romance][😂Comedy][🪐AU][🤪Crack humor][👻Mystery][⏳Long read][🧩Clue]

Summary: His wife, one of his drivers, an engineer, his mentor, and you (Toto's assistant) all look at the body on the floor. Is the boss really gone? Loose inside this locked garage is the murderer. Who of you killed Toto Wolff? And why?

A mile-an-hour

[👩‍❤️‍👨Toto (boss) x reader(fem Merc employee)][💘Romance][😂Comedy][🪐AU][🤪Crack humor][🗄The Office][⏳Long read]

Summary: Getting hired on the Mercedes-AMG PETRONAS F1 Team from the thousands of applicants seemed like the pinnacle of your career and a privilege. Such a prestigious and life-changing opportunity until you arrive there… Smoke is flooding the garage, Lewis is dressed exactly like George in casual clothing for some reason, and Niki is playing sad Taylor Swift songs on the piano. At the same time, engineers try to catch a loose Roscoe throwing stuff everywhere. Why is even a piano in here?! Ah! And you almost forgot, Toto Wolff is crying inside his office.

Fast Car

[🗯+18][👩‍❤️‍👨 Toto (young f1 driver) x reader(fem f1 driver)][🥵Smut][💔Past lovers][☔️Pinning][🏎Team dynamics][☠️Toxic love][👹Make up and angrey sex][👄Power play][⏳Long read]

There was a time when he used to be your everything. Since childhood, you two shared a dream of one day becoming F1 drivers. Miles away from your families, you grew up only having each other, racing and experiencing life side by side. The short step from friends to lovers left natural, but the following step from F1 drivers to enemies deeply scarred you. When your ambitious team offers Toto the open seat, well aware of his reckless and wild reputation, you wonder if the sweet guy you fell in love with is still hiding inside that ruthless, don juan, cold-hearted two-time world champion. It's going to be a hell of a season for you.

Cursed to Love

[🗯+18][👨‍❤️‍👨 Lewis (Witch) x Sebastian (Human)][💘Romance][🥵Smut][🧙Fantasy][🌠Epic][🔮Lore][🩸Horror/War/Violence][🛖Period Piece][😪Drama][☔️Pinning][📿Soul mates][🪐AU][🌈Queer][✍️WIP][⏳Long read]

Summary: Lewis' birth was prophetized by the whispers of the leaves, a long-awaited moment by his tribe, eager to welcome the future leader of their motherlands. Yet destiny had unforeseen plans for him. Hidden in the darkest of the forest amid the horrors of the night their tales will call "The Great Devastation", cursed since his first breath with a heart tethered to a human soulmate in a chain he won't be able to break, bond by blood and magic to a love so pure, it will leave his body to ache, a cruel enchantment that simply won't fade away.

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st4rd0lly · 4 months ago

Text

ＴＯＮＧＵＥＳ＆ＴＥＥＴＨ —

CONTENT WARNING : this fic series will contain DARK content , smut , age gap (reader is mid-late 20s while Nikolai is in his 30s) , probably inaccurate detective work descriptions , and religious themes. this does not follow canon and it is a non ability AU

chapter warnings : suggestive themes (angry sex gets mentioned once) ; firearm

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍𝐄 : 𝐖𝐇𝐎 ?

A detective.

That’s what you are.

Or well, that’s what you were. You had left that life behind you, swore on it. You weren’t a terrible detective by any means, quite the opposite. You were notably the smartest detective in your city. Sharp and witty, reliable and smart. That’s what you prided yourself on. But with making bigger shoes, you made yourself nearly look like a clown when you stepped out of them. All it took was one case, one case to make you step down.

And like that, you were out of the game.

With no interest to push yourself forward in your career, you sidelined yourself much to everyone’s dismay. You had people relying on you, people who needed you. But a normal life is what you desired after what felt like an action film that lasted forever. It’s what you deserved.

You didn’t lose all that much like you expected though. People still respected you for what you did, your ex-coworkers still treated you like their own, they still come to you for advice and you gave them your best. You became a mentor for younger detectives, a rowdy but loveable group who wanted to follow your footsteps.

You were content with the life you led. All trauma considered, you’d say you’re doing pretty solid for what you’ve been through going through cases.

You were happy for once, you were content with this domestic life you’ve made for yourself.

"Someone tells me you’re sick of old games. Let’s play a new one. =)"

You repeated the note left on your window to your ex-work partner, Mikhail, on the phone. Staring at it with furrowed brows, you cursed to yourself. "I quit this shit for a fucking reason." With a groan, you slam yourself back down on the couch.

"Did you check security cameras?" Mikhail questioned, groaning along with you. He’s been by your side since your guys’ first day together, two peas in a pod. You still remember the days where you were just young rookies together. You guys weren’t Sherlock Holmes and Watson by any means, but some might argue that your dynamic duo could come close.

Your face fell into a deadpanned expression, "You really think I wouldn’t?"

"Hey, I’m just trying to make sure we covered all bases. But knowing you, you probably already did that so I guess it was a stupid question— which is besides the point though." You could tell that he was just at a lost as you are.

"Misha, I wanted to leave this stuff behind me." You said, a little more solemnly than you’d liked to admit. "I thought after I faded out in the system for a bit, things would be okay for me. Sure, we’ve made our enemies—"

"You especially."

"Yes, me especially. But I know that most of them are in prison and the others are respectable enough to do this stuff to my face instead of… whatever the fuck that is. I wanted out."

"And you will be out. One day, I promise you." Mikhail reassures, his usual lighthearted tone softening. "Do you think it could be the same guy from our last case together?" He asks.

And you wished you had an answer. The last case you ever took on as an official detective left you in pieces that you’re still trying to pick up to this day. There were too many missing factors but so many were coming to a horrific realization. There were no hints one moment and then the next, there were. Each step closer you thought you took, set you 10 paces back with little time to catch up. That case had flipped your life upside down and around. Like some sick cycle.

If it was the same bastard behind that case, you were sure that the old you would’ve jumped at the chance.

But you aren’t the person you were in the past, and you haven’t been for a long time.

Maybe this was exactly what the guy wanted, what they came here for. To wait for things to get calm till they could hit hard again. Or maybe, there was a chance that this note could’ve come from a new, completely different person. Someone who wanted to take out an old big shot to make themselves look even bigger. There was just too many open spaces with a huge gap of no information. It could be anything from anyone.

"I don’t know Misha, with the little to no info right now… it literally could be anyone." You admitted, not trying to even hide the defeat in your voice. Your brain searching, scanning, and recalling for anyone that stood out to you in your life. Someone who would mess with you like this, taunting from afar. It hits you like cold water in the morning. "Oh my god. What if it’s my ex?"

"You think you got yourself caught up in like a weird crazy ex revenge situation? What was the guy’s name again?" Mikhail questioned.

"Nikolai. Nikolai Gogol." You responded, rubbing at your temple. Fuck, if it really was Nikolai…

But that was so long ago, way before your last case. And that relationship was never going to last, the both of you knew that. You wanted different things, you two were different…it wouldn’t have worked out. Maybe he wanted Bonnie and Clyde, turn you away from the so called righteousness and justice that is detective work. Live out a life of crime. You never were aware of what he did for work, you were able to tell it was dangerous. And maybe in another life, he was able make you his Bonnie.

You made sure that this wasn’t that life.

Thinking back to all the times you’ve spent with him makes your heart has plunge into your stomach. You were aware that he wasn’t the greatest person to date. You said through heated kisses and angry sex that it was just the rush, the thrill of it all in the relationship you had with him that kept you around. Each time he could only laugh in your face. All his talk about freedom definitely added a new perspective to your life, but it was so extreme.

And oddly enough when you wanted to end it, he was very much less than pleased even though that’s all he’s ever wanted. To be free. He’s a walking contradiction though and he left your life without a trace. You refused to look back.

It wouldn’t make sense to mess up your life now.

….

When did he ever make sense?

"I’ll check in with the database, see what I can scoop up on him." Mikhail attempts to reassure you, though it does little to soothe your thoughts. He never knew about the complexity of your relationship with Nikolai. Just that it was strange. He didn’t know how dangerous he was.

But you weren’t about to tell him right now, not while it felt like someone was watching you. "Okay…"

"Did you ask your neighbors if they saw anything? What about that one neighbor across from you?" Mikhail suggested. "Take a picture of the note and I’ll drop by with some of the team by your place so we can investigate more. Better to not tamper with evidence so just use the picture to show your neighbors."

"Okay, yeah I’ll do that." You agreed, it wasn’t a bad idea. "Thank you Misha."

"I’ll be there in about fifteen. Go chat with your neighbors. Don’t die."

"Trying not to." You chuckled, hanging up the phone. You stood back up from the couch, looking at the window with disdain. The note was still there, staring back at you. Though you knew nothing was confirmed, you tried to find any hints of Nikolai’s presence. The only thing sticking out to you was the smiley, and that wouldn’t be viable evidence of anything. You shook your head, opening the camera app on your phone and snapping a picture.

Now that was done and over with. Time to talk to your neighbor.

Your neighbor was a relatively tall and attractive man you would say. You’ve never talked to him before, only seeing him for a brief moment when you walk to your car or when he goes out. Your window allows you a somewhat good view outside. Though you could also say that his appearance did make him stand out too.

Tossing on a jacket, you hoped your neighbor wouldn’t judge too hard if you were in your pajamas. It was still early in the morning when you woke up to that note.

You bite your tongue, you shouldn’t leave the house unarmed. Taking a quick trip back to your room, you put on your belt that you wear to do your mentor work. The one that’s meant to hold your firearm. You grab your gun in your drawer to put in your holster.

You opened the door, shivering a bit as the cool air hits your skin and hugged yourself tighter. Whoever put that note there must be really motivated to mess with you because who on earth would put a stupid note on a window when it’s this cold?

Taking a couple of steps towards his door, you placed a firm knock. You really hoped he was here. It would be an even shittier day if he wasn’t and you were waiting out in the cold longer than you needed to be. But thankfully, the door opens.

"May I help you?" The rich Russian accent caught you off guard, making you blink in surprise. You weren’t sure what to expect when he did speak but it wasn’t that.

You gave the man an apologetic smile, "Hi I’m so sorry to bother you early this morning but I was wondering if you had heard anything strange late at night or earlier in the morning? Or if you had seen anything weird?"

The man looks down at you for a moment and you could tell he was studying you. His eyes were probably the most vibrant shade of a deep purple hue that you had ever seen before. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking, he had a good poker face you had to admit. He only tilts his head to the side, looking concerned. "I had not heard anything out of the ordinary. I usually am not here all that often because of work, but when I am here, I like to stay in my bedroom and rest."

He sounded genuine, and he definitely looked genuine. But those years you’ve spent as a detective grew your skills, and you’ve kept them sharp. You wouldn’t have been earnestly praised highly as a detective if you weren’t good at catching onto the small things. A blessing and a curse. There was something off about this neighbor of yours that you couldn’t place your finger on.

You couldn’t let him know that though, so you only shook your head again and waved your hand. "Ah, I’m so sorry again then. There was just a note left on my window and I was just wondering if anyone saw anything. It’s okay, thank you for your time."

"That sounds terrible, forgive me if I’m overstepping but are you certain it wasn’t your roommate playing some sort of prank?"

……

You could feel the gears in your head pause abruptly. You blink at him in confusion.

Roommate?

"I don’t have a roommate?" You clarified, raising a brow at his comment. But he only reciprocates your confused expression.

"Is that so? I was sure you did. There was this man I’ve seen at your place before quite often whenever I’m here." He tells you, and your mind goes into a frenzy. What the fuck was he talking about? Was he talking about Mikhail?

"I’m sorry, could you explain more?" You kept your tone polite, and it was obvious you weren’t expecting this. You were too distracted by the thoughts swirling in your head that you didn’t realize that you were shaking a bit from the weather.

"Here, you should come inside. I have some tea prepared for myself but there’s enough to share. I’ll tell you what I know. Part of it is that it’s bad manners to keep a guest outside in the cold." He opens the door more, stepping out of the way.

Jesus, you really did want to stop being dragged into these games.

#. . . words of the crimson moon —✫・゜・。.#bsd x reader #bsd x you #bsd x y/n #gn reader #nikolai x reader #nikolai x you #nikolai gogol x reader #nikolai gogol x you #. . . jester at the house —✫・゜・。.

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flowerandblood · 1 year ago

Text

The Song of Songs

The Gate of Salvation Universe Oneshot

[ young pope • Aemond x catholic • female ]

[ warnings: soft sex content, fingering, masturbation, smut, sexual tension, anxiety, doubts related to faith, religious guilt ]

[ description: Her relationship with the Pope becomes more than complicated, especially since it looks like he has no intention of giving up on her or their relationship. His efforts lead to her being assigned a special room in the Vatican, where he visits her at night. Main theme: sexual tension & holy touch. ]

This oneshot is the events that take place a few months after The Gate of Salvation. This is a special chapter written to celebrate my one year on this platform, which falls on March 22. I used fragments from the biblical Song of Songs, hence the title oneshot. I recommend everyone to read it, it is the most erotic and at the same time one of the most poetic and beautiful parts of the Bible.

Next: Death and Ressurection (Oneshot)

Aemond as a Pope Edit Series Characters Moodboard Aemond NSFW Alphabet

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

My other works: Masterlist

_____

She was not sure how her presence in the Vatican had become her daily routine, spending more time in the quarters surrounding St Peter's Basilica than in her flat.

Although she tried to protest, the Pope personally made sure that a room was prepared for her to sleep in the private part of the complex reserved for guests. She knew he was still adding to her workload just to make sure she stayed there overnight.

At first, he visited her sporadically, saying he couldn't sleep – he came to her room and spoke about his thoughts, doubts, premonitions, seeking her advice on spiritual and everyday matters.

She listened to him sitting on her bed, not knowing what she should do, how to respond – his worries as Pope were something incomprehensible to her, something she had never thought about before.

Only later did she realise that he did not expect her to solve his complicated problems.

She was his solution.

He only showed her what he really needed later, when he sat down next to her, when he touched her cheek, brushing it with his fingers – his gaze was dreamy, warm, full of tenderness, making her feel hot in her lower abdomen, a shiver running down her back.

"– my sweet flower –" He whispered softly and she drifted off completely, closing her eyes, focusing on the wonderful touch of his hand, her heart pounding hard as his forehead pressed against hers, his shaky breath enveloping her face.

Her fingers found his cheek, his jaw, his hair and his neck, she heard him sigh softly as he wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer.

"I need you." He whispered.

She could hear how hard it was for him to get those words out – a shy moan escaped her lips as his mouth found hers in a tentative, soft, sticky kiss, her body responding to his closeness with an embarrassing wetness between her thighs.

His kisses became bolder, louder, stickier with his saliva, his warm breath mingling with hers in her throat, his scent filling her entire lungs as he lay on his side, pulling her onto the bed with him.

After what was happening between them at night, he usually needed a day or two to calm down, overwhelmed by how intense their closeness was.

He risked a lot when he started sneaking into her room more often, strolling through the dark marble-lined corridors dressed in his snow-white tracksuit with his hood over his head – he ended up at her door, and fearing that someone would see him, she always let him in, helpless.

"You shouldn't sleep here, Holy Father. What if someone catches us?" She muttered, looking at him pleadingly, already wearing her pyjamas, the same ones she had worn when he had visited her in her flat for the first time.

He looked at her, surprised, pulling the hood off his head, combing his short hair with a careless flick of his hand.

"Do not fret, child. Have faith. God is watching over us." He replied calmly, putting his phone down on her nightstand, pulling his white sneakers off his feet, slipping under her duvet as he did every time he visited her, intending to fall asleep in her bed.

She felt both heat and fear at the sight, swallowing hard as he reached over to the bedside lamp and turned off the light, acting as if this was his room and what he was doing was perfectly normal and ordinary.

She moved uncertainly towards him, knowing there was no point in resisting him and lay down next to him on the bed, sighing quietly as his arm immediately embraced her, snuggling her into his chest.

"− did you say your evening prayer? −" He asked in a whisper, a wonderful, hot shiver ran through her entire body as the tips of his fingers began to comb through her soft hair.

"− yes, Holy Father −" She muttered, feeling that she was losing the battle with herself as she did every time – his closeness, his scent, his voice were addictive to her. Involuntarily her fingers tightened on the material of his sweatshirt at his back, her face snuggled into him, seeking refuge.

"− good − sleep −" He murmured, his lips placing a warm, soft kiss on her hair.

She sighed quietly, twisting in her place, feeling how at the sound of his voice and his tender touch her walls clenched tightly, already sticky with her wetness.

It had been two days since he last visited her.

He forbade her to touch herself, saying it was a sin.

She closed her eyes and tried to comply with his request, but she couldn't calm down, feeling his heart pounding fast, his manhood in his sweatpants twitching once in a while, pushing softly against her stomach, making her involuntarily start to rub against him.

"− I'm sorry −" She whispered helplessly in a voice full of shame and he kissed her forehead. His hand immediately slipped under the material of her shorts, running tentatively over her soft buttock before his fingertips found her hot, puffy womanhood, sticky with her moisture.

"− I have obeyed you, Holy Father − I swear −" She mumbled regretfully, panting quietly into his sweatshirt, rolling her hips in rhythm with the strokes of his fingers, already experienced in how and where he should squeeze her to give her the greatest pleasure. She heard him gasp as she spread her thighs wider, the tips of his fingers beginning to dig into the fleshy structure around her clit with her sweet cry of pleasure.

"− I know, sweet child − I am with you − I will reward your suffering −" He whispered in a low, deep, trembling voice from which a shiver ran along her spine. She clenched her eyes shut, holding back a sob as two of his fingers finally made their way inside her, stretching her throbbing, wet muscles painfully slowly − she clasped her fingers against his back, rising and falling against it with a loud click, feeling that his manhood was already fully hard, throbbing impatiently in his sweatpants.

"− let me, please −" She mumbled pleadingly, lifting her face towards him, his tongue slipping between her lips as she heard his quiet, tender shhh, joining her in a hot, thirsty, sticky kiss.

Even though she begged him to let her relieve himself, to touch his manhood with her hand or lips, he never let her.

He felt that he could not bear the remorse caused by the thought that she had contributed to his sin, that as long as he was the only one touching her, she was not as guilty as he was, and though she disagreed, knowing that she wanted it as much as he did, she tried to respect his decision, to poor effect.

She squirmed loudly as he swapped two of his fingers for his thumb, with which he pressed a little spot inside her, his middle and index finger brushing her bud again, teasing her encouragingly.

She felt like her heart was going to jump out of her chest, a helpless whine escaped her lips, his free hand sinking into her hair.

"− please, let me, please, please, please −" She begged, feeling her tears begin to run down her cheeks − she heard him draw in the air loudly, involuntarily pressing his length against her stomach, rubbing against her, searching for any source of relief – his thumb thrusted deeper into her wonderful spot, making her cry loudly into his mouth, his slick tongue deep inside her throat.

"− I can't − God, I can't, my sweetest −" He gasped, heartbroken, his kisses greedy, full of pleasure, of suffering, of desire, of affection, of tenderness, full of their teeth, their tongues, their lips and their saliva.

She had the feeling he wanted to devour her, her wetness dripping down his hand, her walls beginning to tighten around his thumb, sucking it inside.

"− Holy Father −" She mumbled out with difficulty, hearing that he was panting and moaning along with her, holding her close, his hand pressed against her womanhood as she tilted her head back, moaning in fulfillment, his lips kissing again and again her red, tear-drenched cheeks.

"− I love you − I love you, I love you, I love you −" He whispered in a trembling voice, his hand slid down to her buttock and clamped down on it, pushing her closer, his hips rubbing hungrily against her, trying to chase his own fulfilment. She threw her arms around his neck, joining him in a kiss − he murmured into her mouth in delight, pulling away from her after a moment, looking at her with dreamy eyes.

"− please −" He whispered, stroking her cheek with his shaking hand, her fingers immediately beginning to undo the buttons of her shirt, revealing merely part of her naked body, not uncovering her breasts.

He groaned helplessly at this sight, pressing his forehead against hers, looking down at her exposed skin – she threw her thigh against his waist, responding to the rocking of his hips, and he gasped loudly, turning onto his back with her, his fingers trailing over her sternum down her bare stomach.

"− please − please, please, please −" He breathed out again and tilted his head back with a loud sigh as she began to rub against him, rolling her hips back and forth, his throbbing, swollen cock hidden under the thin material of his sweatpants, leaking already with his precum between her thighs, his fingers tightened on her buttocks forcing her to speed up.

"− say it −" He muttered, and she moaned softly, feeling how her hard, popping nipples begin to peek through from under the material of her shirt, betraying her arousal, her insides clenched at his request in pleasure, all moist from her fulfilment.

"− I am yours, Holy Father − both now on earth and after death in heaven −" She whispered sweetly – she saw his lips part in a low groan as she grasped his wrist, guiding it to her plump breast, exposing it with a movement of her shoulder and immediately covering it with his hand – his fingers clenched greedily on her delicate skin, making her merely moan as she felt his cock begin to twitch and throb beneath her in pleasure.

"− so soft − so beautiful −" He mumbled, lifting himself into a sitting position, his free hand sinking into her hair, the other squeezing her breast, not even for a moment exposing her, his lips swollen with desire sunk into hers, his hips rubbing against her more and more intensely with his throaty groan of desire.

He wanted to come so badly.

He never asked her for it out loud, but she could see it in his gaze as he pressed his forehead against hers, panting loudly, that pleading, ashamed, misty look asking for relief.

She lifted herself slightly then, slipping the material of her shorts off her legs with difficulty, his eyes fixed on her face the whole time as he lowered the material of his sweatpants with his lips spread open at the same time.

"− don't look − come here −" He gasped, pulling her back, groaning loudly as her leaking womanhood pressed against his naked body, his swollen, hard cock throbbing all over and twitching between her thighs, dripping with his precum. The tip of his nose sunk into her cheek as he placed his hands on her naked waist, rocking his hips back and forth, his manhood rubbing against her slick folds.

"− good God − you are so devoted to our Lord, are you not? − always so wet for me −" He exhaled delightedly, speeding up, his lips pressed to her chest, kissing her bare, smooth skin between her breasts, between which hung a small gold cross, a gift from him, which she now wore instead of the one from her grandfather, so that he could have the feeling that a part of him was always with her, touching her naked body.

He never looked down, focusing only on the sense of touch, not wanting to deprive her or himself of their intimacy, to sin by thinking of physicality instead of the spirituality he found in this act of union with her.

"− yes −" She mumbled out with difficulty, responding by bucking her hips to his movements, teasing and squeezing him so that she could hear the loud, sticky click of her own moisture from which they both quickened their pace. Her fingers clamped in his hair, hugging him tighter into her, his fingertips digging into her buttocks, each of his strokes rubbing her clit, making her walls begin to throb wonderfully inside her again.

"− if only I were your husband − if only I could − I'd fuck you every day, morning and evening − after prayer −" He added, as if this was an essential part of that fantasy – she tilted her head back, whimpering with pleasure, his hands sliding lower, between his and her thighs. The thumb of one of them began to brush her clit in circular, sure strokes, and the other grasped his manhood, using her moisture as lube − she heard him squeeze himself with a sticky splats, panting loudly, his face pressed against her chest.

"− Holy Father − so good − ah −" She babbled with difficulty, completely absorbed in her own pleasure and his closeness, rising slightly on her knees. She saw him look at her with horror and desire as she positioned herself over the leaking tip of his manhood, but not looking down, resting her hand on his shoulder for balance, letting its fat, pink head push against her fleshy, hot slit.

"− ah − n-no − please − oh fuck − don't stop −" He breathed out, simultaneously trying to escape and thrusting his length deeper between her moist, slick folds, as always trying to fight with himself, to no avail, his swollen manhood was already halfway in, throbbing like mad.

She pressed her forehead against his with soft moan of delight, closing her eyes, focusing only on the fact that she felt him, that he desired her, that he was loosing his mind because of her.

Once he was deep inside her, his fingers involuntarily dug into the plump skin of her buttocks, shudders of pleasure and disbelief ran through her every time he slammed into her quickly and confidently with greedy, desperate smacks of his hips, unable to contain himself, surrendering to the euphoria that was overtaking them both.

"− God − so tight − so warm − fuckk −" He babbled, opening her wide on his fat cock with each thrust of his hips – she felt every vein on his thick manhood perfectly, every twitch of it, ashamed of how lewd her moans were, how greedily her walls squeezed him and sucked him in, wanting to keep him inside her.

"− please, please, please, save me −" She mewled sinking up and down on his throbbing length, at the mere feeling of him inside her stretching her fleshy muscles so wonderfully, uniting with her in that final way she came again, tilting her head back with a sweet, surprised cry of pleasure.

She heard his loud, throaty groan when he heard her words and felt her fulfilment on his erection, her moisture running down her thighs – as usual when he felt his was close he slid out of her quickly, cumming into his own hand with a loud sigh of relief that shook his body.

As always his orgasm made tears of pleasure, regret, delight and shame run down his cheeks, which she wiped away quickly leaning over him, snuggling into him, panting loudly, his clean hand immediately embracing her, stroking her back.

She grasped his other wrist, feeling him resist her, wanting to raise his hand higher, to her lips.

"− n-no − stop − it's dirty −" He mumbled through tears, sniffing loudly and sighed, simultaneously heartbroken, helpless and enchanted when she slid his fingers, sticky with his semen deep into her mouth.

"− we have already discussed this − wasting it is a sin, Holy Father − is it not? −" She gasped between flicks of her moist tongue − she heard him swallow hard, looking at her as if charmed, letting her lick his pearly, sticky liquid off his naked skin.

"− I shouldn't − you don't have to −" He began in a trembling voice, watching closely her treatments, unable to look away from this perverted sight.

"− I want to −" She hummed softly, kissing his already clean hand tenderly, smelling of his fulfilment and her saliva; she leaned towards him, hugging her face to his, their hands stroking each other reassuringly.

"− you are the love of my life −" She whispered in his ear, and he sighed quietly – despite the fact that she had repeated it to him so often, he still clearly did not believe that it was true, that she reciprocated his feelings, that she was not disgusted by him, that she had no intention of deceiving or abandoning him.

"− will you forgive me? −" He muttered, and she smiled softly, pressing her face against his hot cheek.

"− I'll forgive you if you forgive me −" She hummed tenderly, hearing him swallow hard.

"− I forgive you, sweet flower −"

"− and I forgive you, Your Holiness −"

She felt him slowly begin to calm down − he wiped his cheeks and she slid off his thighs, quickly putting on her shorts as he headed for her bathroom, locking himself inside to get himself cleaned up.

When he came out he was still quivering.

It seemed to her that the experience of fulfilment was something almost frightening for him, even more so with her when he obviously loved her so dearly.

She reached out her arms to him and he snuggled into her like a small child, pressing his face against her bare skin between her breasts – he took a heavy breath, focusing on her hand that covered them tightly with the duvet, then began to stroke his hair with the calm, tender brushes of her fingers.

"Until I met you, I did not understand the Songs of Songs written down by King Solomon. I couldn't get through them, considering them to be sinful texts. I didn't know how they could be part of the Bible. But now I understand. You are my beloved. My bride." He whispered, and she felt a squeeze in her throat at his words, recalling the lyrics of these poems, so filled with metaphors of physical affection that it seemed like a book made for lovers.

How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies. You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.

You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. How delightful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume more than any spice!

Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride; milk and honey are under your tongue. The fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon. You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain.

"That would make you my beloved, Holy Father." She whispered quietly, gently brushing his hair with her fingers, feeling how quickly her heart began to pound at this shameless confession.

She heard him hum under his breath, delighted, moving his lips over her bare skin, kissing tentatively a small part of her soft, plump, exposed breast.

"Indeed. I have never felt the presence of God so much as when I am with you. Inside you. When I kiss your naked body. I think then: God must exist, since He has placed such a perfect being before me to be my joy and comfort." He muttered, his lips leaving again and again the sticky, warm trail of his mouth on the bare skin of her breast.

"This is my heaven on earth." He whispered into her warm skin, running his large hand down her back under the material of her shirt, and she smiled at his words, for some reason fulfilled and happy.

"As is mine."

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gejo333 · 2 years ago

Text

An Unexpected Match IV

DILF/DBF Miguel O’Hara x Female Reader

Pt. 1 Pt.5

Summary: After painfully finding out about Tyler cheating on you, you go to seek comfort in Miguel’s arms.

18+ Warning!!! This chapter will have a lot of smut.

I apologize for any grammatical mistakes I missed.

I didn’t reread over this yet cause I’m exhausted. But I will look over it tomorrow.

I think Friday is the best day for me to post. For now it will be once a week. But I’ll let you know if I’m able to post twice a week.

I’m sorry I haven’t posted this chapter sooner. I’ve been busy getting adjusted back to college.

Enjoy 💕

Wc: 3.5k

____________________________________________

Your eyes fluttered open, awakened by fingers gently brushing some of your hair out of your face. A smile graces your lips as you stretch your back slightly and wrap your arms around his neck. Miguel pulls your body against him, smiling down at you before he captures your lips into his. Even lying in bed with him, he still towers over you.

“Good morning.” You kiss him again as you brush some of his dark curly locks that were sticking to his forehead.

“Good morning, Hermosa. Did you sleep well?” Miguel smirked as he gazed down at your naked figure against him under the duvet.

“I did. Especially after you helped me last night.” You lightly chuckle as you get on top of Miguel, straddling his lap. You rest your hands on his broad chest as you smile at him. Miguel rests his hands on your hips, gently rubbing circles into them.

“I can help you again right now. How does that sound?” Your eyes widen, a smirk spreading on your lips as you feel Miguel’s morning wood against you. In one swift move, Miguel flipped you on the bed so that he was above you. His plush lips turned into a smirk as he leaned down and left kisses up your neck.

“Amor, how are you feeling?”

“Well, I’m feeling aroused right now.” You smile as you wrap your arms around his neck, bringing him in for a kiss. Miguel returns the kiss before he pulls away, smiling as he gently brushes his thumb across your cheek.

“I’m mean about last night. You came to me in tears. And you never told me what happened to you.”

A sigh escaped yours as your lips formed into a small frown. “You know how I’m feeling right now? I’m feeling not aroused anymore.” You slip from underneath him and get out of bed. You put on your panties and steal his sweatpants as you grab your hair tied to tighten the waistband. Then, you bend down to grab your tank top and put it on.

Miguel sighs, frustrated in himself for being his own cock-block. He gets out of bed, grabbing his boxers and another pair of sweats since you stole his before following you out of the bedroom and downstairs to the kitchen. It was still early morning and hours before Gabi would be dropped off from her sleepover.

“We should really talk about it. After almost a month of trying to get you back in bed with me, I didn’t expect you to come to me this fast. Is it about Tyler?” Miguel walks into the kitchen and leans back against the kitchen counter, watching you make coffee. He groans as he shifts his stance to shift his uncomfortable boner.

“Do you want milk in your coffee?” You ask him, grabbing the carton out of the fridge. Miguel moves behind you, trapping you against the counter as he gently takes the milk out of your hand, sitting down on the counter.

“Y/n, don’t ignore my question. Please answer me.”

You turn around, now facing him, and you raise an eyebrow. “Your seriously playing the authoritative card on me?”

Miguel glared softly at you as he put his arms on both sides of you and leaned down. “Don’t make me punish you. I’m trying to paw my hard erection away, but I can easily have you help me instead. Now tell me what happened last night.”

You look away from his gaze, surrendering as you bite your lip. A tear escaped as it fell down your cheek. Miguel’s gaze softened as he cupped your face and brushed away the tear.

“I caught Tyler in our bedroom with another woman.”

Hearing your words made Miguel’s blood boil. How could he cheat on such an amazing woman as you? It was downright horrible and idiotic.

“I’m so sorry, cariño.” Miguel wrapped his arms around you and pulled you against his chest to comfort you.

“As soon as I saw it, I walked straight out of there and drove right to you. Though it was obviously over between him and me when I caught him, I know I still need to say it. But he’s probably been cheating on me for god knows how long. I should have ended it a month ago when my feelings changed.”

Miguel’s heart skipped a beat from hearing your last words. Did your feelings change for Tyler because of him? “A man like that doesn’t deserve you. You deserve a man who will always be good to you and who can give you the world if you desire it.” He gently lifted your chin slightly so you could look at him.

“Do you mean a man like you?” You chuckle from your small joke but stop when you notice the seriousness in his gaze.

“I am. “Miguel’s thumb gently brushed your lower lip before he leaned down and kissed you. Your arousal rushed back to your core as you deepened the kiss.

Miguel picked you up and sat you on the counter as he spread your legs and grabbed the back of your knees, pulling you closer to him. He pulled down your sweats and panties as his hand trailed up your thigh before his finger gently brushed your clit before inserting his finger inside of you.

Your grip around him tightens as a moan escapes your lips that were smashed against Miguel’s own. Miguel began a pace, adding a second finger inside you as his lips trailed from your lips down to your neck. With his other hand, he removed both your tank top straps as he lowered your top, revealing your breasts. A gasp left you as you felt him rubbing your nipples. Miguel smirked as he captured his lips on yours as his tongue entered your mouth. You feel your core tighten as you clasp around his fingers.

“Miguel.” You whine as he removes his fingers from you just when you are about to orgasm. Miguel chuckled from your pout as he kissed your lips while lowering his sweats and boxers, revealing his throbbing member, drips of precum leaking from the tip. He grabs you by the thighs and pulls you off the counter before turning you around and bending you over.

He leans over you as he kisses your back to your neck before whispering in your ear, “Let me make you feel good, amor.” Miguel spreads your legs apart with his hand before you feel his tip brush against your sensitive, wet folds.

You bite your lip as you feel him slowly enter inside you.

“Let me hear your sweet voice.” Once he knew you were ready, he almost completely slid out before he rammed back inside you. He grabbed your hips to help steady his rough pace into you.

“Miguel.” You moan out his name as he stretches you the deeper he gets, making your eyes almost roll behind your head. Miguel pulls your hair back lightly, raising your head as he kisses your neck.

“I don’t know what you do to me, cariño. I can’t control myself when I’m around you.” Miguel’s teeth gently grazed your skin, sending shivers down your spine to your tightened core. His hand lowered to your clit as he began to rub it in circles; a long groan escaped you from the increase in pleasure.

“Miguel, I’m-uhh.” You lowered your head to the counter as you released yourself. A groan escaped from Miguel as he felt you tighten around him. A few thrusts more, and he spilled deep inside you. Miguel lightly rested his body against yours, sweaty skin and skin as he kissed the back of your neck. “Thank you, amor.”

The doorbell rang, making Miguel groan in frustration as he removed himself from you, tucking himself back into his boxers and sweats.

You quickly lift your panties and sweat as you fix your tank top. Another ring from the doorbell echoed through the house.

“Is it Gabi?” You ask Miguel as you clean the kitchen. Miguel looks back at you with the same perplexed look as you. “She should be at soccer practice right now. Stay here.” Miguel walks to the door and opens it. His eyes go wide.

“Hey, Sam,” Miguel says loud enough for you to hear as you quickly make it upstairs to his bedroom. Why would your father be here this morning?

“Hey Miguel, sorry, was I interrupting anything?” Sam chuckled, noting Miguel’s bare, sweaty chest.

“Just had a quick workout. That’s all.”

“I bet it was a workout. Glad you’re getting some action.” Sam chuckled as he pat Miguel on the shoulder before walking inside, which was normal. If it was normal circumstances. But with you upstairs in his bedroom, Miguel was nervous to have his close friend in his living room.

“What’s with the surprise visit? Everything alright?”

“Actually, it’s about y/n. She didn’t come home last night.” Miguel’s heart raced in his chest. It’s only been one night. How is it possible that they could have been caught? “Usually, Sarah and I are fine with it. She would be at her apartment, but Tyler came asking to see y/n this morning. I was just wondering if you’ve seen her.” Sam added as he headed towards the kitchen.

“How about we stay in the living room, Sam,” Miguel suggested as he tried to get ahead of him. It was too late as Sam entered the kitchen. However, Miguel sighed in relief when he found you weren’t there anymore.

“What’s up with you this morning? You’re a bunch of nerves right now.” Sam chuckled as he gave Miguel a confused look. He then noticed the two mugs of coffee on the counter. “Ahh, I see. You have a lady here. I’ll be on my way then. Let you get back to her. But please give me a call if you do see y/n.”

“I will. I’ll see you later, Sam.” Miguel gave him a small smile before walking to the door and saying goodbye.

Miguel took a deep breath as he closed the door before breathing out. That was a close call. Too close. He walked back upstairs to his bedroom, where he saw you dressed in your clothes from yesterday.

“From the looks of it, I guess you heard the conversation.” Miguel sighed as he grabbed a shirt from a drawer and put it on.

“Yeah, I did. I can’t believe that bastard came to my house this morning. But I must go there to tell my parents I’m fine. I’m sorry that you had to lie to my father. But thank you.” You finish putting on your shoes before you stand up and walk over to Miguel.

“It’s alright. We need to figure out our relationship before dealing with everyone else. When the time comes, it might not be a pretty reaction.” Miguel chuckled as he held you in his hand and gazed down at you with loving, soft eyes.

“Well, for now, that’s a future problem. Right now, I have to deal with the problem waiting for me currently at home. Wish me luck.” You sigh, a small smile on your face as you go on your toes to kiss him.

“If you’re free, would you want to come for dinner tonight?” Miguel’s breath went still, awaiting your answer. He didn’t realize he was holding his breath until he saw that beautiful smile on your lips.

“I would love to. I’ll see you later today, then.” Miguel leads you downstairs, giving you a loving kiss goodbye before you sneak out of his house, checking to ensure no neighbors see.

You get into your car and drive down the street to your childhood home. You groan in annoyance when you see a familiar sports car parked out front. Of course, the asshole was still here, waiting to plead his case to you.

As you walk in, you hear Tyler talking with your parents. All heads turned towards you when you entered the living room.

“Y/n! Thank god you are safe. We were all so worried.” Your mother hugged you, which you gladly accepted before pulling away.

“Tyler, what are you doing here? It was pretty obvious that we ended things when I caught you cheating on me. So get out.” You sent him a nasty glare as a gesture for him to leave. Tyler stood up from the sofa and walked up to you, trying to caress your cheek, but not before you quickly stepped away from him.

“Kitten, I’m sorry. It was a dumb mistake on my part. Please, let’s put this past us. Come here.” Tyler walked closer to you again as he brought you into a hug. You tried to push away, but his grip around you was strong.

“Tyler, let me go. We are over!” Tears began to spill from your eyes, overwhelmed by heartbreak. Your stomach rose, sick to your stomach as Tyler caressed your face.

“You’re just emotional and angry at the moment, so you’re not making the best choices.” Tyler leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. You immediately removed your lips and pushed him away before a loud smack echoed.

Tyler’s face turned to the side, a red mark on his cheek. He turned to you with a smirk. “OK, fine. I deserved that. But let’s sit and talk things out. Right, Sarah? Sam?”

“Mom? Dad?” You look to your parents, confused and angry by Tyler’s last words.

“You’re mother can speak for this. I’m not part of this. I can’t entirely agree. But as you can see, your mother is glaring daggers at me.” Your father sighed, shaking his head.

“Care to explain, Mom?”

“I think you’re making a mistake. Yes, I’m mad that he did that to you, but you have been so happy with each other. It’s been so good. People make mistakes. You should talk it out and forgive him.” Your mom walked over to you as she tried to brush some of your hair behind your ear. However, you pulled back. Your heart aches for another reason now.

“I’m leaving. I’m not living here.” You leave as you head up the stairs to your room, where you begin to pack a suitcase with clothes and necessities.

You text Stephanie asking if you could crash for a week while you try to find a new place to live, which your best friends happily agree to. After packing, you left downstairs, where your parents and Tyler tried to reason with you to stay. Tears still slip down your face as you keep the silent treatment as you walk out the door.

———

One month later

“I found a few places on the market in my price range. Do you want me to look at them and help me out?” The phone rested against your shoulder, your head holding it as you multi-take with chopping vegetables.

“Totally! I love that type of shit! Our own version of house hunters.” Stephanie said on the other end of the call.

“Perfect. Thanks again for letting me crash at your place. It means a lot.”

“Of course! You always have a place to stay with me. Plus, you did pay for half the rent this month, which you insisted upon. I must finish this deadline, but I’ll see you later tonight.”

“OK, cool. See you later. Bye.” You end the call as you continue with your task. You heard the front door open and close as you heard light, quick footsteps approaching the kitchen before you felt small arms wrap around you.

“Hi, my baby bug. How was practice?” You set the knife down as you lean down and return the hug.

“I scored two goals!” Gabi released you from the hug as she jumped in excitement from telling her news.

“Omg, that’s amazing Gabi! I’m so proud of you! I wish I was there to see it!” You jump in excitement along with her as you lightly lift her up and twirl her around before setting her down. You then take the carrot sticks, put them in a bowl, and hand them to Gabi.

“Can I please have hummus with my carrots?” Gabi asked.

“Of course.” You go to the fridge to grab the hummus tub and grab a spoon to scoop some for Gabi.

You walked into Miguel’s office once you helped Gabi settle down in front of the TV to watch cartoons.

“Hi.” You say as you walk up towards the sexy workaholic. You lean against his desk as you gaze at him, staring at the multiple screens of complicated equations. “I don’t know how you can understand what’s on that computer. That looks like numbers, letters, and scribbles to me.” You giggle, which makes a smile appear on Miguel’s face, earning you a small victory and, finally, his full attention.

Miguel moved before you, putting his arms around you and pulling you against him. “I’m sorry amor. You have my full attention.” Miguel smiled lovingly down at you before kissing you passionately on the lips.

You pull away after a heated kiss, a string of saliva the only thing still connecting you both. A naughty thought came to your mind as you gently moved away from Miguel and went to lock the door.

“What’s on your mind?” Miguel smirked as he caught your lustful gaze. You walk up to him and slowly drag your hands down his chest before gently pushing him to sit on his desk chair.

“You’re smart; I think you can easily figure it out.” You get on your knees and settle between his legs as you unzip his pants and free his half-hardened cock.

A few strokes from your hand brought it fully to life. You dragged your tongue up his member before kissing his leaking tip, your gaze not leaving him once. You open your mouth for him to slide onto your tongue and down your throat.

“You treat me so well, Hermosa. I don’t deserve you.” Miguel moaned out as his hand reached the back of your head. His fingers intertwined into your hair as he gently thrusts into your throat. You hum against his cock in approval, earning another groan from Miguel’s lips, music to your ears.

“Your mouth is heaven. You can take more of me, can’t you, amor?” Miguel gently thrusts more of himself into your mouth; luckily, you were able to stop your gag reflexes from kicking in as you continued to move your tongue along his cock.

Miguel groaned in pleasure and frustration when he heard your phone buzz for the millionth time against the desk. He rolled his eyes, knowing already who was calling you.

Since you broke up with Tyler a month ago, he has been spamming you with messages and calls to get you back. Finally having enough of it, he picked up your phone and took of photo of you sucking him off. It’s not the first time he’s taken a video or photo of your sexual activities between the two. Whether that’s sliding his fingers or cock into your wet folds, fucking you in different positions.

He then sent the photo to Tyler, saying, She’s busy! Stop calling her.

“That should get him to stop. Fuck, I can’t last much longer.” Miguel set your phone back on his desk before he gently thrust a few more times before spilling it into your throat. You swallow every drop, licking his tip clean before wiping any left off your lips.

Standing up from your previous position, Miguel grabs your hips and pulls you on his lap, straddling you. Your eyes widen when you feel him grow hard again as he lifts your skirt slightly and moves your panties to the side before pushing himself inside you.

“H-How are you hard again? I just sucked you off.” You gasp, eyes wide, as you feel his erect cock enter your dripping cunt.

“You should know by now how strong my stamina is, cariño. We have been fucking for a month. “Miguel chuckled as he grabbed your hips and slammed you down onto him, and began a rough pace, way fast from the earlier throat fucking.

After two rounds, you rested your head against his chest, trying to catch his breath as you felt him spill deep inside you. Miguel removed himself from you, putting himself away as he peppered your face with loving kisses.

“So when will you tell me you’ve been homeless for a month?”

“I’m not homeless. I’ve been staying at Stephanie’s apartment until I can find one. I’m going to a few open houses this weekend.”

“You won’t need to go to any open houses. I found you the perfect place.”

“Where?” Your brows furrowed as you smiled up at him in confusion. Miguel smiled as he kissed you fondly.

“Here. Move in with me and Gabi.”

____________________________________________

Hope you enjoyed the chapter!💕💕💕

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————————————————————————

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#miguel o'hara #spider man 2099 #spider man: across the spider verse #miguel x reader #oneshot #miguel o’hara fanfiction #miguel o’hara x y/n #miguel x y/n #miguel o’hara x you #miguel smut #miguel o’hara smut #miguel x you #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel spiderverse #atsv miguel #miguel spiderman #miguel x fem!reader

641 notes · View notes

naughtyneganjdm · 4 months ago

Text

Threads of Desire - Chapter 6

Summary: Working one one one with Guy is not what Y/N expects it to be and when she leaves work, she has to come face to face with the decisions that she made the night before with Negan.

Characters: Negan Smith, the reader (OC), Guy, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61111030/chapters/159641806

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Cheating, Angst, Smut, Heavy Touching, Oral etc.

Notes: Now that one of my other stories is finished, I will do my best to update this as much as I can so I can get it finished. Thanks to anyone that reads. Sorry life got so busy. If you want to read the other chapters, be sure to check them out here.

No sleep was something that Y/N had pretty much gotten used to over these last few days. By now? She was living on caffeine. Today she was surprised she could even keep her head up. After everything happened last night, Daryl had stayed over until it was time for her to start getting ready for work. So that meant the only sleep she got was between the time she crashed after getting home yesterday and when Negan came over. Caffeine was pretty much her lifeline right now and she was incredibly thankful for it. Especially today since Guy had personally requested her to work one on one with him. That was a big surprise. For the last four years all she had been was Maggie’s sidekick. Now she was actually working with the owner of the company on a big project. It was shocking that Guy would even trust her touching something like this or respect her opinion at all. Being a glorified slave working under Maggie really didn’t give her the right to an opinion.

Yawning out, Y/N turned her head to gaze over at the clock on the wall of Guy’s office. While she was enjoying getting to work on what she was, it was getting pretty dark outside. It was a very long days’ worth of work. Surprisingly? Guy was very much dedicated completely to working today. Everything was very detailed, full of information to help her work efficiently and they made a decent team. By his actions, it felt like Guy was training her for a certain position and it was her first day on the job. If this was someone’s first day on the job though, they would have never had to work this much. This was a lot for someone who had been working in Maggie’s position for years. Someone who was just starting? If they didn’t know what Y/N did, they may have fallen on their face with everything Guy was throwing on them.

Getting to work with Guy today meant that it left Maggie all alone to herself. Amusingly enough, Y/N couldn’t think of the last time that Maggie had ever worked alone. Maybe in her first few weeks on the job before she got Y/N hired as her assistant? Regardless, Maggie was very startled when she learned today that Guy requested Y/N to work with him. Multiple times Maggie tried to insert herself into what they were doing, but Guy never allowed it. That didn’t stop Maggie from making her presence known when she would walk in multiple times during the day to see what they were working on.

Shaking her head, Y/N tried waking herself up enough to finish her work. Today Guy had started her day off with a coffee and breakfast that he bought for her. And when lunch came along, he got her another coffee with their lunch. Even with two coffees, she was doing her best to stay awake.

Shifting in her seat, she stole a quick look behind her to see that the office was completely dark except for the backup lights that remained on during the night. Considering how long they had been here? It was obvious that the two of them were the last people there. Maggie had gone home hours ago and she knew that because Maggie came in to tell them that. There was no longer any daylight coming in from the windows and Guy’s office was the only place on this floor that was lit up. Being alone with Guy certainly was a strange feeling, but it didn’t bother her all that much.

Turning back to her work, she straightened up her posture hoping that she didn’t appear to be bored. It was then she saw across from the large table in Guy’s office that he was staring out at her from the other end of it. His elbow was resting on the table with his hand holding his head up from where it was resting in his palm. Having his big, brown eyes locked on her made her nervous. When their eyes locked, he gave her a big smile and she returned the gesture with a smaller smile.

“I think we need to add some more shots of espresso to your lattes when we get you them next time. Pump you up with caffeine. I expect my employees to keep going for as long as I need them,” Guy winked, adjusting his body to get more comfortable in the seat that he was in. Reaching for the pencil that was on the table, he started sketching at something again. Hopefully that wasn’t him upset with her.

“Sorry,” she frowned forcing herself to continue looking through the paperwork that Guy had given her about an upcoming show that they were having. “I just haven’t slept much over the last few days. I promise I’ll do better tomorrow.”

“You’re doing fine today,” Guy assured her keeping his focus centered in on his work, “If this is what you’re like on little to no sleep, I think we’ll be lucky to see you work well rested.”

“Thanks,” she was surprised to hear Guy say that, but she was going to take the compliment. Giving her a nod, Guy cleared his throat. Wiggling his finger at her, he motioned her to him. Standing up from where she was seated, she moved around the table and looked at the drawing that he had done. “This is for the winter collection?”

“It is,” Guy leaned back in his chair observing her gazing upon the drawing. “There is something that you don’t like about it.”

“It’s not that I don’t like it,” she began, biting down on her bottom lip realizing that she was stepping out of line. It wasn’t her place to give her opinion on things like this. “You know what? No. Never mind. It looks great. I’m sure when you make it, people will love it.”

“No, no…” Guy reached out to snatch her hand to pull her back toward his end of the table. Standing up, Guy forced her to take a seat in his chair. “If you think there is something I could do better, show me. I need a moment to stand anyways.”

“I don’t want to offend you, I just know it’s the main piece for the show and…” she started, a rush of liquid warmth flooding throughout her body with Guy hushing her. Shaking his head, he leaned forward to grab the pencil and handed it to her. “Can I talk it out with you first?”

“I’m listening,” he muttered, grunting out with him stretching out his body by raising his arms up in the air. The movement drew his shirt to lift to reveal his lower abdomen causing her to swallow down loudly. Forcing herself to look away, she started to anxiously erase at the parts of his design that she thought could use some work.

“I just think it’s very simple for something that was made by you. You like to stun and wow people. It was the thing that drew me to you from the start. It’s not that you go overboard, it’s just that you add something unique. Different. It’s what makes you…well you. It’s what let’s someone know they are wearing the Vixen brand.”

Pressing his hand in against the back of the seat and bracing his weight on the table beside the drawing, Guy watched her draw out what she was thinking when adding to his design. It made him smile when she seemed to get lost in her idea until the very end. And when she was done, she pushed the art before him with a nervous glance.

“If you hate it, that’s okay. It’s easy to erase and go back to what you want,” she thought aloud with Guy looking it over. Anxiety was eating away at her with the person she had admired most of her life finally getting a real look at her work. “I guess it’s kind of a nod to one of your original pieces from years ago. Just a little bit different. That was a piece for spring though, so we want something more…”

“Like this,” Guy commented with a firm nod of his head, sucking at his bottom lip. Moving over toward his desk he set the drawing down and gave her a thumbs up. “I’ll see what I can do. You keep surprising me. You know that?”

“In a good way, I hope,” she noted moving back over toward where she was sitting originally to get back to work on what she was doing before. Moving across the office, Guy sat on the edge of the table and motioned her to stop.

“Both yesterday and today I have been going out of my way to quiz you on what you know,” Guy explained to her, reaching up to brush his fingers through his dark hair. “And you haven’t missed a step. Not once. You know more about this company than I think Maggie does.”

Well, that was a true statement, but she didn’t know how honest she wanted to be with him, “I’m sure that’s not true.”

“Oh no, it’s very true,” Guy claimed, stroking his fingers down over the side of his chiseled jawline. “You know way too much for someone who is just a personal assistant. I mean, I know they say the nurses are better at the doctor’s job than the actual doctor, but this is a little too on the nose.”

Forcing herself to look down, she cleared her throat and attempted to reach for the work to finish again, but Guy pushed it back on the table. Outstretching his hand, he faintly grabbed her chin to get her to look up at him, “You really do admire the shit outta me, don’t you?”

“Maggie’s words?” she wondered with Guy giving her a firm nod, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. “If you mean admire you in the way that you’re the whole reason I got into this business, then yeah. I do. I did.”

“Did?” he repeated the word with her sliding back in her chair and getting him to release her face in a way that wasn’t rude, just a way that showed she didn’t want to be touched like that right now.

“You’re kind of a dick,” she responded getting a deep rumble of a laugh to fall from Guy’s throat. That was probably too bold of a thing to say, especially since she had been working with him all day. “You haven’t looked at me once in four years. But suddenly you see me one night in Maggie’s apartment while you are fucking her and you end up liking my breasts. So now I’m okay?”

“Let’s work this out together,” his voice was deep, a rumble of a growl falling from his lips. In the moment his accent was quite thick and it made her sigh. She’d be a fool to say that Guy wasn’t attractive. He was. A lot of things about this man were very charming, but there was still that rage for him that she had. “Let me ask you this. What have you done in the last four years to make me notice you?”

“Exist?” she pointed out, her eyebrows full of emotion when she shifted uncomfortably before him in the seat. “Do you know how many times I passed you in the hallway or how many times you came into that office and you never saw me?”

“I don’t want to lie to you,” he began, thinking over what he was about to say and he threw his hands up in the air. “I’m not gonna hide it from you. I’m an asshole. I’m arrogant. I’m rude. I do think only a certain type of person deserves my time. But when you impress me, I will treat you very fucking well. I came from nothing, I worked my ass off to get here and I’ll be damned if someone tries to make me feel bad for that. Yes, I missed out on some incredible talent with you. I recognize that, but you accepted your position. If you would have come to me and talked to me. Maybe something would have happened.”

“Jesus,” she scoffed, looking away from Guy. It had a lump growing in her throat with how eerily familiar that sounded. “I have been hearing that kind of thing a lot lately.”

“It was a long time ago that I hired Maggie on. I like people that have influence over others and at the time I thought that was her. And I thought she had talent,” he rambled on, his voice growing rasp. “I’m assuming you applied at the same time and I was unimpressed by your resume. Or maybe I saw Maggie’s first and I stopped looking after Maggie’s. Did you ever think of that?”

After that comment? Yeah, she started to feel pretty stupid.

“What if I’m willing to give you the job I originally gave Maggie when she first started?” Guy offered up, simply shrugging his shoulders and sighing. “I’ll give you that empty office down the hall. It’s not as big as Maggie’s, but it is still nice. And I’ll sign you on with a higher pay than Maggie had originally.”

“Why?” she didn’t understand how all of a sudden Guy was willing to put himself out there and give her the one thing she had wanted for most of her life.

“Because you’ve impressed me and before you even suggest it’s because of your tits,” he interrupted her thought process, holding his finger up to motion her to wait. Moving around the table and back to his desk, he grabbed the drawing she helped him alter and set it down before her. “It’s not. Maggie saw this before she left. And she said nothing. You? You made it better. You have endless fucking knowledge of this company and you sat in the shittiest possible position for four years. So maybe I’m fucking impressed and willing to give you what it is you finally want.”

Swallowing down hard, she didn’t know what to say and it had Guy throwing his hands up again, “So, what’s your answer? If I’m willing to write up a contract, will you take the job?”

“When?” she breathed out, her eyes lifting as she adjusted again in her chair.

“I’ll have you keep working with me until the end of the year and then on the second, we’ll officially start you. I’ll start paying you now for it though,” Guy offered, lowering down to sit on the edge of the table again caressing his hands over his thighs. “I don’t know why you even look like you’re contemplating it. You would give yourself completely to me, right? And I mean in a workplace setting.”

“As much as I possibly can,” she agreed, nodding her head and tipping her head to the side when she considered her personal life. “While I would love to dedicate my entire life to things, I do have a daughter.”

“You have a…” Guy paused, his dark eyes growing big. “How did I not know that you have a daughter? What is your daughter’s name?”

“You didn’t know I existed five days ago,” she reminded him causing a dramatic roll of his eyes before he nodded with acknowledgement of her statement. “Her name is Jordyn. She’s eight years old and she comes first.”

“Jordyn? You mean like little Jordyn that runs around the office sometimes?” he muttered and it impressed her that Guy could even recognize a child in the office since he seemed so oblivious to the world around him. “You share a child with Maggie’s boyfriend?”

“Kind of,” she didn’t know how to answer that question, her chest aching at the thought. “Jordyn’s mom died when she was a baby and I’ve been taking care of her ever since. So while I’m not her biological mother, I’m…”

“Fuck that biological shit. My mother left me on the kitchen floor when I was two years old took off on me and I was raised by my stepmother who is more my mother than that bitch ever was,” Guy scoffed, waving his hand in the air dismissively. “Okay, then I understand. I will be understanding of you and your daughter. You have my word. I’ll work with you.”

Outstretching his hand, Guy held it before her and she knew that this was a big decision. There was the chance that Maggie could get angry with her, that Maggie would try to keep Jordyn away from her, but this was her dream. Leaning forward in the chair, she took Guy’s hand in hers and gave it a firm shake. With a faint smile, Guy released her and then headed over toward the desk to write a few things down.

“Okay, that’s enough work for today. Let me take you to dinner so we can celebrate your new job,” Guy offered reaching for his jacket to pull it on. Standing up from where she was seated, she headed for her belongings and started to put her jacket on too. “Do you like Italian food?”

“You’ve already bought me breakfast and lunch. Along with coffee,” she recalled with Guy stepping before her looking down upon her with his dark eyes. Amusement flooded his handsome features with her reminding him of all the things he had done for her today. “You want me to go home and sleep Guy. Tomorrow is Thursday. I have two more days of work to get through for you. And I haven’t slept all week.”

“Go to dinner with me, then you can go home and I’ll allow you to come in two hours late. How about that?” Guy stepped in close to her lowering his hands and making her nervous when he started to button her jacket together for her.

“You’re not my boss, Maggie is,” she reminded him of what the truth really was right now. “And I don’t think she’d be okay with that.”

“Well too damn bad. I’m Maggie’s boss which means I have the final say,” he nodded toward the door for her to leave. Grabbing her bag, she felt Guy’s hand pressing in over her lower back to lead her toward the elevator. It was strange walking through an empty office like this. Standing side by side with Guy felt awkward beneath the small amount of light that was still shining above them. Being this close to him had her heart hammering inside of her chest. Even though this was all still so nice, she couldn’t help but think of Negan’s warning yesterday about Guy wanting to have sex with her. And that might have been the only reason he was doing this. “I have to be honest with you about something. I lied. Maggie told me you applied on the night you came to her apartment. So yesterday I went back and found your resume. My assistant does a good job with filing things.”

That was a bizarre confession, especially since a few minutes ago he was acting like he didn’t even know that she applied, “And your resume was very impressive. Which does tell me I saw Maggie’s first. You had a hell of a recommendations list. All those professors backing you? Not one of them backed Maggie. Not even Negan Smith.”

“So you know his name?” she stammered, a smirk tugging at her features since he had only been referring to Negan as Maggie’s boyfriend. “Now do you know him for only being Maggie’s boyfriend or…”

“Everyone who is anyone knows who he is,” Guy stressed to her, giving her a quick glance from where she was standing. Moving forward, he pushed the button a few more times in irritation that the elevator wasn’t coming up faster. “I knew him from baseball and I knew of him from his work with the movies.”

“You hardly react when you see him,” she was impressed that Guy seemed to be a fan, but never showed it. “I would think you had no idea who he was if I had to make that kind of bet.”

“I can’t act like someone impresses me. It would look bad for me,” Guy admitted with a roll of his dark brown eyes. “Someone like me needs to pretend that they are the biggest person in the room. That’s just my attitude.”

“Maybe you can work a little on that,” she teased him drawing out another scoff from his lips. “Hey, people might like you better.”

“You’re a ball buster, you know that?” he smirked giving her an arch of his eyebrow. “The fact you let yourself be overshadowed for so long confuses me. You should have been walking into my office and demanding my attention. You would have gotten it if you let the real you shine through.”

“Good to know that my whole life I’ve been held back by not being too forward,” she noted realizing that it was a common thing everyone was telling her lately. An amused rumble fell from Guy with his handsome features locked on her. “Sorry.”

“No, I like the spiciness,” Guy explained, dropping his hands so that they were resting at his hips. “I do have a question though. And I hope it doesn’t offend you. Too much.”

“Oh boy,” she exhaled, finding herself entertained and preparing herself at the same time.

“Not once have you thrown yourself at me. We’ve been alone all day. And nothing,” Guy reminded her with a dramatic expression, tipping his head from side to side. “You didn’t even try to sneak in a grab here or there.”

“And neither did you,” she commented, clapping her hands together in a way that had Guy groaning under his breath in frustration. “I like working with you and we were just working. I want this job Guy. I don’t want to have sex with you.”

“I like working with you too,” Guy assured her, leaning forward and resting his shoulder against the wall. “But the question is still there. Why not make a move? Do you not find me attractive? Am I not your type?”

“Oh, you’re very much my type and you know you’re attractive. You use that to get what you want, which I applaud you for,” she responded, reaching out to place her hand in over his chest to pat over it in a playful manner. It had him flashing her a big smile that she knew in most cases she would be incredibly charmed by. “You’re hot. Your body is very nice. And if I met you in other circumstances, I would love to be fucked by you.”

“Jesus,” Guy slurred, his eyelids growing heavy with the way she just said that so straight forward. “I don’t understand what the problem is then. I’m attractive. You’re attractive. Why can’t two attractive people have sex?”

“You’re my boss,” she pointed out honestly finding herself wishing that the elevator would just make its way up to them. It was a few hours after what she assumed would be prime traffic time so she wasn’t understanding why it was taking so long. “That’s why?”

“Okay? And? We work good together. I bet we’d have good sex together,” Guy suggested, licking his lips and bobbing his head about. Most people would probably be offended by this point but she just found herself entertained with how hard he was trying. “Even today, we could have fucked on the desk and then got back to things. I can do that kind of thing.”

“I won’t lie to you Guy,” she began, stepping in closer to press her hand in over the side of his face. Unpredictably it made his eyes flutter to a close and she couldn’t believe she seemed to have that kind of effect on him at the moment. “I want you to respect me. And I want you to respect me for my work. Not because we had sex.”

Dragging her hand away, she went to hit the button a few more times with Guy’s dark brown eyes slowly fluttering to an open, “You were the person that I admired most going into this work. I’m flattered that you want to have sex with me and in most cases, I would jump at the idea. But I would rather be respected by you than fuck you.”

“God, you’re cute,” Guy scoffed, his nose wrinkling considering what she was saying. “I’m not just saying that because I am wildly attracted to you. I do respect you. The fact you haven’t slept with me? That says a lot. Usually most people I throw myself at don’t put up a fight.”

“I’m not surprised by that,” she chuckled, thankful that the elevator looked like it was starting to head up toward them. “You lay it on thick.”

“Maybe, but? I do mean it though. I will still respect you if we end up having sex,” Guy whispered causing her to burst out laughing. He laughed in response, throwing his hands up in the air as they spoke almost in a defense. “And I will still want you to work for me.”

“Do you just want to jerk off and come on my tits?” she inquired, her eyebrow arching in curiosity surprising him with her bluntness. “I mean, that’s what you focused pretty heavily on the other night in Maggie’s apartment.”

“You have nice breasts,” Guy defended himself, placing his hand firmly in over the center of his chest. “You can’t blame a guy for taking a shot at it.”

“I’ll accept the compliment,” she rolled her eyes nodding toward the elevator again. “But I don’t want to be like Maggie. I’m not going to let you come on my tits. No matter how hot the visual might be.”

“So you like the idea of me coming on your tits,” he commented getting a glare from her in response. “Okay, okay. You don’t have to be so sassy about it. But you telling me no? It just makes me want you so much more.”

“That’s typically how it goes,” she reasoned with Guy knowing that when someone had everything they had a hard time being denied when they finally were. She saw it with Maggie and she could see it with him. “You also had sex with Maggie by the way which really just makes me uncomfortable.”

“Now that is a lie,” Guy cracked with the doors opening up to the elevator. Holding his hand out, he let her get on the elevator first with her giving an odd expression. “You don’t care that I had sex with Maggie. I get there is some kind of thing going on between you and her, but if anything? If you really wanted to, I think your sex would be incredible because you’d have something to prove. To show me that you are better than her.”

“I am better than her,” she stammered, leaning back at her corner of the elevator. “I’m very good at what I do. I know my body well and I pay attention to details. Very well. If I rode your cock I would have you addicted to me, that’s how good I am.”

Some of the color drained from Guy’s face with his lips parting. Looking down toward his pants, Guy laughed and let out a tense breath, “And here I was thinking you were a good girl. You just made my dick hard by saying that. And you want me to act normal toward you? That shit just went out the window. I’m gonna picture you fucking riding the shit out of me all the time now. Every time I look at you.”

She couldn’t help laughing at the situation, he was throwing it out at her so she was just throwing it back at him using something similar that Daryl had told her the other night, “Thank you by the way.”

“For what? Getting an erection?” Guy grumbled under his breath, shoving his hands into his pockets to try to get the material pulled away from his body. “Or because I haven’t forced myself on you after that comment? Because if that’s the case, what’s the fun in that shit? I’d really much rather you wanting to do it.”

“No, not that,” she was quick to shake her head knowing that he was focusing pretty heavily still on the sex stuff. “You’ve actually really brought my self-esteem up. I wasn’t feeling too good about myself lately, but having someone as hot as you wanting to sleep with me? It’s kind of elevated things for me.”

“Oh, don’t tell people that I brought your self-esteem up. I might actually start to get known for being a good person,” Guy groaned, dramatically acting disgusted at the thought. “We need people to think I’m a bitchy asshole. It sells so much better than a nice, ego lifting person.”

“Wouldn’t want that,” she teased, shaking her head firmly. “You make me laugh. I think I should be offended by the things you say, but you make me laugh.”

“It’s because I’m good looking. If I was ugly and gross, you’d probably be offended,” Guy suggested throwing his hands up in the air getting a shocked expression from her. “Let’s be realistic here, I should have you running and getting me in trouble. But you’re one, too dedicated to this job and two, you’re flattered by it. You just told me that.”

“Did you go after Maggie this hard?” she couldn’t help but wonder getting a tiny laugh from Guy. “I assume the two of you are close.”

“No, I sleep with Maggie when I’m horny. Well, okay. No. I’m horny all the time. I sleep with Maggie when the opportunity presents itself and I have nothing else,” Guy explained to her, his head shaking as he spoke. “Maggie threw herself at me during something like what we just did together. I’m not going to turn away a blowjob by someone beautiful. You can call me an asshole for fucking around with someone who is dating another person, but I just don’t care. If someone wants to have sex with me and they are hot? As long as I have a condom or they do? I’m fucking ready to go. And even though Maggie is dating Mr. Smith there, I’m pretty sure she’s infatuated with that pizza boy. She only fucks me because she wants me to be in awe of her, but she’s just a fuck for me. I don’t view her as anything beyond that.”

“That pizza boy?” she repeated what Guy had just said, her heart skipping a beat. What the hell did that mean?

“Yeah, the cute one that comes by all the time. Maggie is always buying pizza for the office just to see him,” Guy rambled on, waving his hand about when the elevator doors opened once they reached the main floor. “And no one really eats the pizza. Consider where we work honey. It’s obvious that it’s to get to see that cute boy.”

“I had no idea,” she admitted realizing that for once she didn’t pick up on the small details. Stepping forward, Guy placed his hand in over her lower back urging her forward out of the elevator. “I guess you have a better eye for detail than I do.”

“That’s why I’m the boss,” Guy winked, his fingers curling around her wrist to get her to stop. “So you do think I’m attractive though? For my ego.”

“Yes, I think you’re attractive,” she chuckled having his face flush over with red. “Why does the top fashion designer that used to be a model need me to tell them that they are good looking? You know you are.”

“Because you’re the only person crazy enough to tell me no,” Guy frowned, dropping his hands to his hips when he stood before her. “Okay. How about this? If you’re ever feeling incredibly depressed. I mean like…super, super down. We can pretend that you don’t work for me. You can show up at my apartment and we can spend hours having sex. I will happily work to make you feel better. It won’t change our working environment at all.”

“I’ll think about it,” she knew that it wasn’t going to be something that she would be brave enough to really do, but with Guy snapping his fingers at her, she knew that he saw it as hope. “It’s very unlikely you know.”

“Unlikely still means there is a chance,” he debated with a small laugh causing her to roll her eyes again. “And I promise it won’t change the fact I have respect for you and still want you to work for me. And the work environment thing…I mean, if you want to have sex in the bathrooms or something, that’d be kind of hot, but…”

“Enough,” she pushed at the center of his chest having his laugh growing since she was amused with his over-the-top antics. “You’re not what I pictured. You know that?”

“Right, you thought I was gay,” Guy responded, his eyebrow arching showing that he had heard her conversation with Maggie when they were at Maggie’s apartment. It had her stopping in her tracks, panicked when she realized that he knew that. “One thing I also have is incredible hearing.”

“I’m so sorry,” she was worried with how Guy would respond and he dramatically shook his head. “You heard all of that mess then. I’m sorry. You should have never heard all of that drama. And the things that were said about you.”

“Mhmm…” Guy smirked when she stopped to stare up at him. “I’m not offended that you thought I was gay Y/N. Most people probably assume that. I think Maggie did too until she saw me flirt with someone. I’m also aware why you won’t sleep with me. You know, beyond the whole wanting me to respect you thing.”

“And why is that?” she wondered, her heart skipping a beat when Guy pointed behind her. Looking over her shoulder, she let out a long exhale when she saw that Negan was sitting in the waiting area. Once they locked eyes, Negan stumbled to get up from the chair.

“You’re twitterpated with Maggie’s man,” Guy was quiet enough so that only she could hear him. “And I say fuck him. He wants to fuck you too. Look at the way he’s staring out at you with those puppy dog eyes. Desperate for your attention.”

“I don’t…” she shook her head, looking to Guy who gave her a smirk. “We’re just friends.”

“Right,” Guy smacked her ass as he stepped beyond her drawing out a tiny yelp from her. “We’ll take a raincheck on that dinner. Why don’t you go work your cowgirl skills on that man. And if you come in two hours late tomorrow, I’ll fully understand. I know what I would do if I were you right now and it would be to drain that beautiful man dry.”

“Guy!” she gasped at how forward he was being when he gave her a wink and headed for the doors.

Instead of responding, he just headed out of the building allowing Negan to approach her. Holding his cell phone at his side, Negan looked between her and then to the doors where Guy had left, “Negan? What are you doing here?”

“I uh…” Negan rubbed at the back of his neck showing the discomfort in his body. “I was waiting for you?”

“This long?” she replied with Negan giving her a small nod. Considering her work schedule normally would have had her getting off work hours ago, she wondered how long Negan had been sitting there waiting for her. “Why?”

“A few reasons really,” Negan began, his thick eyebrows bouncing up as he shoved his phone back into his pocket. “He didn’t…he didn’t hurt you, right? Like, force you to have sex or anything?”

“No, no he didn’t,” she promised him realizing that there was a genuine worry that Guy would have forcefully thrown himself on her. “We didn’t have sex. I won’t let that happen. I told you that.”

“I know you did,” Negan seemed shy in the moment, pulling his jacket closer to his body with him tipping his head back. “I was wondering if you wanted to go out and get a drink with me or something. Maybe go somewhere to eat?”

“Why didn’t you just call me?” she wondered, realizing that she may have tried to end her workday earlier if Negan would have let her know that he was here. “You would have known I was working late and you wouldn’t have had to sit here that long.”

“I was afraid you wouldn’t have answered,” Negan explained, his hazel eyes filled with an emotion she couldn’t read. After last night? He was probably right. Things were complicated now. They were no longer friends. They were something else. Two people who did something wrong. “Please? Can we just hang out and go somewhere?”

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea,” she admitted, wishing that she may have had warning to prepare herself for whatever she could say to Negan.

“Why not?” Negan frowned, his posture slouching forward with him visibly disappointed. “We’re friends. We should be able to hang out sometimes. Right? Just the two of us?”

“Because you’re Maggie’s boyfriend,” she reminded Negan hating to admit it, but it was true. There seemed to be a desperation in his features and she didn’t understand why. “Why are you suddenly so eager to spend time with me?”

“Why are you suddenly so eager to not want to spend time with me?” Negan threw that back out at her with her frowning. They were pretty much talking right now like what happened last night didn’t. And it made things weird. “We were so close for so long. Is it wrong for me to want that again? I just want the two of us to be close again. I miss you. I miss us.”

“And what about Maggie?” she brought up the elephant in the room. The thing that made all of this more complicated. “Doesn’t she want you home?”

“Maggie is supposed to meet up with her family tonight. So it doesn’t matter anyways,” Negan declared, reaching out to curl his fingers around her wrist loosely after she went to turn away from him. “Jordyn is spending the night at a friend’s house. And I want to spend my time with you. Please.”

“Damn it,” she cussed under her breath. With those big hazel eyes and the way his expression looked truthfully incredibly pathetic, she couldn’t tell him no. It was his way of begging and she always had a very hard time telling him no. “Fine. We can go somewhere to hang out and talk for a while. Just nothing too extensive, okay?”

“I saw a place right down the street. I’ve heard people talk about it a few times. I know you love Christmas and it’s like a sports bar that really decorated heavily for the holidays,” Negan’s fingers stretched out to hook with hers to lead her toward the door. Following him, she didn’t know how to react with him wanting to hold her hand while they walked. Right now would have been the perfect time for one of them to say something, but they didn’t. There were small flurries of snow falling from the sky as they walked down the busy street together. When they got to the place, Negan led her toward the door. From the outside they could tell that it was busy. But that was pretty normal for New York in general. Especially around the holidays. Stepping inside had the both of them pausing immediately to gaze upon the place they had just entered. Negan wasn’t wrong. It looked like the North Pole exploded and this was created. It was very much in your face and it had the both of them gazing upon the many decorations that people were up and out of their seats looking at. “Uhm, whoa.”

“You’re not kidding,” she knew that she liked Christmas, but this was very extensive. There were so many decorations hanging from the ceiling, covering the walls and set up on the floor that she was surprised there was any room at all. “Wow would be an understatement.”

“Well hello there, welcome to the jolliest place on Earth,” the host greeted them at the door and by the expression over the woman’s face they both could tell that she was sick of repeating that welcome. Reaching for something from behind the counter, she grabbed a set of reindeer antlers moving forward to place them on Y/N first. Lifting her eyes, she heard the antlers jangle from the bells that were hanging from them. Of course it was hilarious for Negan until the host put a set on him as well. Standing frozen at the entrance, she knew they were both debating if this was the place they should have been right now. “Would you like to sit downstairs today at one of the tables or would you like to go upstairs in the bar area?”

“Is upstairs quieter?” Negan wondered, his nose wrinkling when he looked around the first floor to see how many people were there with children climbing all over things. “Maybe there is an area that is a little more private for two people to be able to…talk?”

“Upstairs would certainly be that for you since it’s more adult themed,” the host waved them on, moving for the stairs with them both cautiously following her up them. “You will get the occasional person from downstairs wanting to come up to see the decorations up here, but a majority of them are downstairs. You’ll have a better time up here.”

Uncomfortably Negan cleared his throat with his eyes lifting to look up. Giant red ornaments were hanging above them and the stairs had garland covering them. The second floor was definitely the better place to be. Up here? There were more televisions than there were downstairs. She assumed on a game night this would be very busy, but since it wasn’t there were only a few stragglers around or people just looking at the decorations that remained on the second floor. Downstairs there were loads of families wanting to spend the holiday together. Up here? It seemed like most of the people were solo just getting off work wanting a drink and a place to relax. It felt like two completely different places. Except for the overabundance of decorations

Leading them toward the far corner of the bar area, the woman motioned them to take a seat. No one else was near them and if they were? They weren’t paying attention. Thankfully they were tucked away so they could have some peace.

Y/N was the first to sit after they took their jackets off and when Negan lowered himself down across from her, the bells on his antlers rang causing his cheeks to flush over with embarrassment. Laughing to herself, she reached out across the table to tap playfully at the bells. By doing that she received a glare from Negan that had her bursting out in laughter.

“It’s not funny,” Negan frowned, allowing her to continue to swat at the bells on the antlers. No one else on the second floor was wearing those fucking things so he didn’t know why the host put the antlers on them.

“Oh, it’s hilarious,” she corrected him, having a hell of a time. She was certain that she looked ridiculous, but she was getting a kick out of screwing with Negan. “Look at you. You look so cute with that on. You picked a great place. I’m glad I agreed to this.”

“I’m glad you’re having fun,” Negan scoffed with her reaching for her phone to pull it out to take a photo of Negan who just stared out at her. There was a strong red color in Negan’s cheeks showing that he was embarrassed. His dimples were prominent and she knew he didn’t want his photo taken, but she didn’t care. Multiple photos were snapped and it had Negan growling out under his breath. “Have you had enough?”

“Not yet,” she snickered, reaching out to grab his chin to give it a small shake. It had the antlers jangling again with her bursting out in laughter.

“You know you have them on too,” Negan reminded her, lifting his hand to flick at a bell that was on hers. “Who are you even showing those photos to? Why did you need so fucking many?”

“Oh, it’s for me and I plan to show Jordyn,” she answered with a bright smile, sweeping her thumb over Negan’s jawline. “You are adorable. You see, I’m nowhere near as embarrassed as you are. Your cheeks are so red. I’m used to making myself look like an idiot, but you? Nah. This has you all embarrassed and it’s cute.”

“Thank you,” Negan huffed, his eyebrows furrowing after she finally let go of his face. Snorting out, Negan rolled his eyes, but decided to keep the antlers on. Not because he wanted to, but because she seemed so fucking happy. In other circumstances, he may have taken them off, but with her so amused? He decided to keep them on. When the waiter came to the table, Negan grunted at the list of drinks that they gave them. It was very Christmas themed and at that point in time, he wasn’t in the mood for something that was overly, flavorful? “Can I just have a bottle of beer please? Something good.”

Ordering the same thing, Y/N observed that it seemed to make the waiter happy that he didn’t have to put on a big show for them. The way they were dressed there had her assuming that they were supposed to be Santa’s elves. This place was amusing to say the least. After he left, she turned her attention to the televisions that they had in there. Out of the corner of her eye, she could tell that Negan’s attention was fully on her while she was still taking everything in.

Tapping his hands against the top of the table, Negan wished she would have been focused on him again instead, “Why were you working so late tonight?”

“Guy wanted me to work with him personally,” she explained, accepting the bottle that the waiter brought for her first. Taking a sip of the drink, she didn’t even seem remotely bothered by the idea that she was working late. Clearing his throat, Negan got her to look at him and she shrugged. “What?”

“Just like that? Nothing more?” Negan thought about what both her and Maggie said with Guy wanting to have sex with her. How long he waited for her downstairs had him worried. Seeing so many people leave and knowing that Y/N was still working didn’t sit well with Negan. “He didn’t…force himself on you or anything?”

“No, I told you. And if he did try to force himself on me I would have knocked him on his ass. Don’t worry about it,” she waved her hand about in the air dismissively, but it wasn’t a thought that he so quickly wanted to let go of. Telling him not to worry only had him worrying more. “We’ve talked about things. He knows that I don’t want to sleep with him and he’s accepted it. Kind of.”

“Kind of?” Negan repeated, his throat tensing up at the idea of Y/N’s boss making it obvious that he wanted to sleep with her. Most people wouldn’t be this nonchalant about that kind of thing. Last night, when Negan showed up at Y/N’s place, he expected her to immediately accept the job offer he gave her. Not continue to stay in a work environment where she was being sexually harassed. “How do you deal with something like that?”

“You haven’t touched your drink,” she ignored the question, pointing toward the bottle that was in front of Negan. Avoiding answering him was the best option right now. Especially if Negan found out that she accepted a position that Guy had offered her. What was supposed to be a moment where the two of them hung out was becoming something where Negan was solely focused on her work relationship with Guy. That wasn’t something she wanted him to do. “Are you hungry? Do you want to order some food or something?”

“I don’t…” Negan paused, reaching out to place his hand in over hers to get her attention back on him when she started looking around the bar again. Frustration flooded throughout him and it was visible in the way that he looked at her. “I don’t understand. Why are you acting like nothing happened?”

“Because nothing happened. I just worked with him the whole time,” she promised him, but when she answered him he licked his lips uncomfortably and it was obvious that’s not what he meant.

“I meant with the two of us,” Negan corrected her original assumption of what he was asking her about. “You’re acting like yesterday didn’t happen. First with the changing room and then last night…”

“Because I have to,” she swallowed down hard, drinking more of the beer that she had ordered. Suddenly, she felt like the room was severely hot around them. “I can’t focus on something that was an accident that shouldn’t have happened. I had been harassing you for over a day. I upset you. And you felt guilty. It’s okay. We both got tied up in a moment.”

“Your account of things are vastly different than mine,” Negan frowned, pushing his drink forward and leaning further back in his seat. There seemed to be so much on Negan’s mind that he wanted to talk about, but he was having a hard time getting it out. “All I keep thinking about is you. About the way that it felt inside of you…”

Choking, she set the bottle down and felt like the world was spinning around her with the way Negan’s eyes were on her. Silence followed with Negan nodding his head. Suddenly she wished she was anywhere but here. Shifting in the seat, she tried to focus on one of the things that was on the television but realized that it was a commercial on pretty much every screen.

“Does it really help to talk about this?” she questioned, keeping her head down so she didn’t have to focus on him. “What is talking about this really going to do for either one of us other than make me feel worse about things?”

“Why worse? I would think this was something you would want,” Negan stammered, his throat tensing up when he looked around the room making sure that people were distracted. “After everything I’ve heard, I would think that you would be happy to have me this hooked on you.”

“You’re still dating Maggie, right?” she interrupted Negan’s thought process, having a rush of color flooding into his face. Just by that reaction, she didn’t need an answer. She chuckled shaking her head in disbelief. “You say one thing and your actions do another.”

“You’re acting like I spent a lot of time with Maggie and I didn’t. After everything, I went home and I checked to make sure that Jordyn was okay. Then I went and slept on the couch. I didn’t even go back into my bedroom,” Negan recalled what happened in their time apart from one another. “When I woke up in the morning, we maybe talked a few minutes before she left the place.”

“You don’t have to defend yourself for talking to your girlfriend,” she declared, shaking her head in disbelief that they were ever having this kind of conversation. “I just can’t think of things a certain way if you are still with her.”

“Okay, but hear me out for a second,” Negan pled with her, his right hand lifting from the table to wave it between the two of them. “I just need to know that if I do give this whole thing up, that you are willing to be in a relationship with me. That there is some kind of possibility between the two of us. That there is a future in this.”

“Not with you dating Maggie,” her words were firm stressing to him the importance of that fact alone. “The problem I have with what happened last night Negan is that you didn’t want to be a cheater again. What happened between you and Lucille? You swore to never be that person again. But we started having sex last night Negan. We did something…”

“This is different,” Negan defended, the vein at the side of his neck bulging slightly. Hearing that felt like a copout and it had her scoffing. “It is different. When I was sleeping around on Lucille, I didn’t have feelings for the people I was cheating with. It was just something to do to make myself feel better. Whereas the two of us have a history. We have something here between us.”

“Since when?” she snapped hating to be so negative, but it was hard not to be. A large amount of color flooded into Negan’s face with him dropping his head down and huffing out. “My whole point Negan is that this thing with me? Cheating? It’s making you someone you never wanted to be.”

“Yeah, well…” Negan licked his lips, but what could he say to that? It was hard hiding things from her because she was probably the person that knew him the most. “I never said I was a good guy. You knew that. And you still wanted me. Right? You still want me, don’t you?”

“Negan,” she had a hard time approaching the subject feeling suddenly very much on the spot. “If this was happening four years ago? Yes, I would have been in heaven. But a few days ago I was listening to people tell me how in love you were with Maggie. If we do something? It will be just like when you were with Lucille. You’ll feel guilty about your affair and you won’t leave Maggie. You will just ghost me even more. And that? That scares me. Because if Maggie finds out, I could potentially lose everything with Jordyn because Maggie will be furious with you. Having an affair? It could take Jordyn away from me. And she’s everything to me.”

“Nothing is gonna take Jordyn away from you,” Negan persisted, his voice deep and raspy with the lines in his forehead creasing further. Hearing that she was scared of losing Jordyn had his chest aching at the thought of it. “Nothing.”

“Easier said than done,” she couldn’t help feeling emotional in the moment with the thought of no longer having Jordyn in her life. “I love your daughter.”

“And she loves you. I’m not separating the two of you,” Negan promised, his hand stretching out to cover hers. Being assured that she would never lose that bond was a good thing, but Negan had also told her a long time ago that they would always be incredibly close. So she didn’t know what to believe. Gradually pulling her hand away from Negan had him frowning. “And as far as comparing Maggie to Lucille? The love that I had for Lucille? It’s nowhere near the same thing. It’s not. I don’t feel guilty for what happened last night. I don’t.”

“Negan, I know you better than anyone. I know the way your brain thinks,” she circled her finger in his direction, having Negan drop his head down and the sound of the bells jangling drew a laugh from her throat. How was she supposed to keep this conversation serious with those damn antlers on Negan’s head? “Right now you may not be feeling guilty about what we did. Things are emotional right now. They are brand new so they feel addictive. You yearn for them. But eventually? Realization is going to hit you that you had a four-year relationship with Maggie. One you worked really hard on. So while you may feel good in the moment? These feelings you are having? They are going to die down.”

“No, no. I don’t think so,” Negan was being defiant with what she was saying, grunting when the sound of the bells came again when he shook his head. “If I would have had sex with you when I was married to Lucille? Yeah, it would have been bad. Both because of the abuse of power with the whole professor thing and…”

“Break up with Maggie and then we will talk,” she cut him off, her eyebrows bouncing up with Negan scoffing. Reaching for his phone, Negan started to type something out and she was quick to snag it. Looking to what he had up, she shook her head and let out a frustrated sound. “Were you really just going to dump her through text messages? You can’t do that.”

“I can. And I’m going to,” Negan countered reaching for his phone, but she was quick to pull it away from him. “Why can’t I? You wanted me to dump her. And I will. To prove to you what this means to me. I’ll do it right fucking now.”

“You need to think more clearly about this,” she suggested, lowering his phone down and keeping it in her hand. “This is a four-year relationship you have had. I saw the way you talked about Maggie. You’re not thinking clearly.”

“For the first time in a long fucking time, I’m thinking clearer than I ever have,” Negan reasoned with her, throwing his hands up and he looked stressed. “My eyes are open to the way things really are and it’s you I keep thinking about. Please stop being so fucking stubborn.”

“If you liked me as much as you claim to, why now?” she wanted an answer from Negan, who bit down hard on his bottom lip. “What’s so different now? Four years ago I would have been falling at your feet. I was at the end of my school year, so your whole I was a professor skit doesn’t work for me Negan. I think you’re high off an emotion because I was honest with you. And you’re fucking with me.”

“I’m not,” Negan defended himself, placing his hand in over the center of his chest. “I was stupid back then. We’ve already had this discussion. Last night…I realized what an idiot I was. A huge fucking idiot. I don’t know what I was thinking over the last few years. I just thought we were supposed to be friends. There were so many times I wanted to, but I was your professor and…”

“You slept with my best friend,” she dug that in, leaning further back in the seat that she was in. “I don’t care what you say. If you felt something for me, you wouldn’t have fucked Maggie.”

“I made a…” Negan realized that he was about to call Maggie a mistake which had him pausing to think about his words. But with how he was feeling right now? That’s how things felt. Because with all the thoughts he had been having, he was comparing how different his life would have been if he made the choice to pick Y/N instead of Maggie. And he realized his life would have been much better off in his opinion if he hadn’t allowed himself to fall for Maggie. “I made a mistake.”

“You don’t think that,” she half laughed and Negan hated that she was having a hard time even looking at him. “We shouldn’t even be having this kind of conversation when you are still with her.”

“You took my phone, so I can’t break up with her,” Negan scoffed, holding his hand out toward where his phone was.

“You don’t break up with someone over the phone or through text messages. Even though I can’t stand Maggie, that’s really fucked up,” she complained, her face scrunching up in disgust at the idea. “And if you break up through text and not in person, it lacks that personal connection. It needs to be done face to face. Because through text? Maggie will just come to you, guilt you and this will be the same conversation all over again.”

“I don’t understand. Do you want me to dump Maggie or not?” Negan thought aloud, confusion flooding his features. There was so much going on. She told him to dump Maggie, but when he went to do it, she stopped him. “Listen, all I keep thinking about is you, and after last night? After last night, all I want is you. I laid awake at night thinking about the small amount of time that I was in you. The way it felt to be wrapped up in your arms and the way you look at me.”

“I’ve always looked at you like this,” she reminded him with a saddened sound. “I probably looked at you better in those first four years. You say you wanted to sleep with me. Yet when you had the chance, it was Maggie you fell for. I just can’t stop thinking about you showing up with those flowers for her. And then showing up to see you sleeping with her…”

“I wish I could go back,” Negan struggled to find the right words, stuttering as he spoke. In this moment, it was hard to look at her. Because he knew that she was right. “I loved being around you. You made me so happy. It’s just Maggie made the first move and I fell for it. I hadn’t had sex in so long and I let my dick guide me.”

“Negan, the young girl inside of me wants to fall for this. Because that young girl? You were everything to her. And she would have done anything for you,” she recognized the person she had always been when it came to Negan, “but the way you looked at her? And the way you talked about her…”

Stopping herself from getting any more emotional about this whole thing, she stood up from the table and it had Negan sitting forward, “Where are you going?”

Tugging the antlers from her head, she set them down on top of the table and swallowed down hard, “I’m going to use the restroom. I need a moment.”

“Hey,” Negan called out to her, but she was quick to head in the other direction needing that time just to calm her emotions.

Following the signs to the restroom, she headed toward the bathroom that had a big photo of Mrs. Claus on the front of it. Considering the other had Santa on the door, she was pretty sure that she was heading to the right place. Pushing the door open made her stop in her tracks at what the inside of the bathroom looked like. String lights surrounded the top of it with decorations flooding the walls. Looking to the stalls, she saw that the doors were wrapped in paper with bows on them. There was no need for the bathroom to look like this, but it did. “Holy shit.”

The sound of the door pressing open was heard and she looked back over her shoulder to see that it was Negan entering the bathroom behind her, “Negan, Jesus. There was a time where I wanted this from you and now that I need space from you, I can’t get you to leave me the fuck alone.”

Stopping when he got to the center of the bathroom, Negan looked around the room with amusement at just how ridiculous it looked. It made both of them laugh even though it was a tense moment, “I know.”

Still, Negan said nothing. Which made her uncomfortable. Stepping forward had her stepping back until Negan had her cornered, “Negan?”

Lifting his hand, he dragged his fingers across her bare shoulder and down over the length of her arm. In that moment, his eyes never left hers. It had her shaking when he dragged his fingers back up over her shoulder.

“Please…” she didn’t know how to respond with Negan’s fingers grasping faintly at the strap of her dress. Pushing it down over her shoulder, Negan nervously licked his lips. Waiting for her to stop him just in case, he realized she wasn’t going to. Loosening the material allowed the front of her dress to drop down in over her breast revealing it to him. There was a vulnerability to her right now with her tremoring before him. Dragging his hand down over her shoulder toward her chest, Negan circled his thumb in over the nipple that was exposed. Arching her back forward closed the distance between the two of them. Negan’s eyelids grew heavy with want, his head dropping down for him to start pressing kisses over her shoulder. “You don’t want this.”

Hushing her had her whimpering with the vibration of it against her skin. Kissing down the same path his fingers traveled had her head tipping back against the corner of the wall. Each caress was wet, lingering and the warmth of his tongue flicked against her skin. The added sensation of his short beard scratching at her flesh felt amazing as his lips traveled between the valley of her breasts. Licking his lips, Negan tipped his head back palming at her breast. Stealing a quick glance at her, Negan hummed and pressed forward to kiss at the underside of her breast. Starting off with tiny kisses, they grew in strength as he continued peppering them over her flesh. Sticking out his tongue, he dragged it out flat against her skin having her purr at the sensation. Circling her nipple with the tip of his tongue had her breathing loudly, her fingers lifting up to caress at the back of his head. Once his lips surrounded her nipple it had her purring out, a moan following.

Forcing herself to look at him, she sank her fingers into his thick, dark hair. Watching him was something she truthfully didn’t want to miss. Panting, she felt a fire flooding through her veins with the way he looked. It seemed like he was enjoying himself while he teased her nipple into a taut bud. Varying between kisses, soft suckling and teases of his tongue. Pulling away with a wet sound, his lips parted while he worked to get the material of her dress down over her other breast. Quickly, his mouth covered her other breast pampering it just as he had done the other. Moans were escaping his throat, tickling at her flesh. All of this was driving her body to warm up rapidly. Her heart was hammering away inside of her chest.

“Negan,” she moaned out his name having him growl against her flesh, sucking tenderly at her nipple. Drawing her closer to him, Negan’s hands settled at her hips. Squeezing them firmly, he pulled his mouth from her body with his long eyelashes fluttering.

Dropping down to his knees in front of her, Negan kept his eyes locked on hers. Biting down on his bottom lip, his hands caressed over the backs of her legs massaging at her body. Dropping her hand down, her fingers swept in over Negan’s jawline with his head turning to kiss at the center of her palm. Tipping his head back, Negan growled out with her dragging her thumb out across his bottom lip.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” Negan slurred, his hands sliding further up toward her thighs. Pushing at the bottom of her dress, Negan worked it up toward her hips. Curling his fingers around the back of her thighs, he squeezed at the flesh that was there. Caressing further up, his hands palmed at her bottom before hooking his fingers into the hem of her panties. Unhurriedly pulling them down had her tremoring before him. Broken breaths were falling from her lips with his hazel eyes locked on hers. Getting her panties to her feet, Negan helped her step out of the material. Still not breaking his stare, Negan pushed her panties into his pocket and licked his lips. Finally dropping his eyes, he gazed upon her most private parts and it made him suck in a sharp breath of air. Sliding in closer to her, Negan started pressing kisses at her inner thigh. “If you want me to stop, just tell me…”

This is where she should have said something, but she didn’t. She liked the way the warmth of his mouth felt against her flesh. The way his short beard scratched faintly at her skin also felt incredible. Bracing one of her hands over his shoulders, she knew if she didn’t that her trembling legs might start to give out on her. There was something in the way that Negan’s hands were caressing at her thighs and her hips that could affect her more than anyone else had when they touched her.

Soon his kisses were moving in over her hips causing her to whimper. The warmth of his breath was lingering over her center with Negan gazing up at her again. Caressing in over her inner thigh, Negan allowed his hand to trail up toward her center. Palming in over her body had her tipping her head back with a small purr escaping her lips.

Leaning in, Negan faintly kissed at her body getting her to shudder upon the contact. Every kiss was teasing at first. Just testing the water of things. But soon his tongue flicked out against her flesh. Dragging the tip of it along the length of her sex had her tremoring against him. The sounds he made were the most delicious thing and it fueled him. Growling against her flesh had her hips arching up to him and he had to grab a firm hold of her to keep her in place. Crying out, her fingers sank deeply into his hair, her whole body tensing up when his tongue traveled the same path up and then down. Circling her clit before suckling at her sensitive folds.

Watching him pleasuring her had her heart skipping beats. Continuously he pressed wet kisses against her body, suckling at her flesh and teasing the length of his tongue over the areas he was learning had her reacting the most. It looked like Negan thoroughly enjoyed what he was doing, taking his time to build up the sensation of it all for her.

Humming against her flesh, Negan dragged the length of his tongue up her folds before teasing at her clit. Tenderly slurping at the sensitive bundle of nerves had her crying out. Pampering her flesh with wet kisses and skillful caresses of his tongue had her biting down on her moans in attempts to keep quiet. Lazily shaking his head side to side, he drew out z-shaped lines against her flesh drawing her to rock against his movements. Pulling back with a wet sound, his fingers lifted to caress at her flesh with his hazel eyes hungrily locking with hers. There was something about the way he looked at her that made her feel like the only woman in the world in that moment. His pupils were dilated, his lips wet and his breathing loud. Everything about this showed that he was enjoying what he was doing yet desperate to see how she looked.

The rough pads of his fingertips circled her clit before dragging down the length of her sex toward her heated center. Keeping his eyes locked on hers, Negan pressed a finger unhurriedly into her and it made him smirk with the undeniable moan that escaped her lips. Even though she was trying to hide it, she had a hard time with the length of his slender digit sliding into her warmth.

Even the way he smiled at her had the desire she felt for him growing. Starting to thrust his finger inside of her, Negan pressed forward to focus on her sensitive bundle of nerves with his talented mouth. Wet sounds were filling the small bathroom with him pleasuring her and soon he added a second finger inside of her.

Dropping her head back, her eyes slammed shut with how good everything felt. Maybe this was all so enhanced with the potential of them getting caught too. This was a busy place. It was very likely that someone could have come in at any time. Yet neither one of them seemed to care. Every motion of his mouth over her grew in strength with her tugging harder at his hair.

“That’s it,” Negan coached her with a deep rumble of a growl, his words vibrating against her flesh. A loud slurping sound followed having her thighs a trembling mess. Forcing herself to watch him, she could tell that he was actually finding pleasure in what he was doing with the way he was moaning against her body. Shaking his head from side to side, Negan’s long eyelashes fluttered to a close. Everything felt like it was spinning with a liquid warmth rushing to her core.

“Negan,” her fingers curled tighter into his hair when he got her to an orgasm between his fingers and his mouth having her a shaking mess against him.

Leaning back on his knees, Negan looked up at her with a proud expression. Licking his lips, Negan hummed when he pulled his fingers from her body and she let out a whimper. Starting to kiss up over the lengths of her abdomen, Negan suckled at her nipple before returning his mouth to hers. The taste of her lingered over his lips and she purred out with Negan’s tongue brushing against hers. By the way her legs felt, she wondered if Negan’s hands weren’t holding onto her if she would have been able to stand. Kiss after hungry kiss kept her worries from escaping her until she firmly grabbed a hold of Negan’s shirt and pushed him forward against the counter. Hissing out, Negan’s hazel eyes narrowed and a wicked smirk tugged at his handsome features.

Closing the distance between them, she palmed in over the center of Negan’s pants causing him to let out a deep rumble of a moan. His eyelids grew heavy with want as she swiftly started to undo his pants. How easily she managed to get the material apart surprised Negan. Reaching her hand inside, she stroked at his length realizing that he was completely rigid beneath her touch.

“This is what you do to me,” Negan informed her with a rumble of a growl, tipping his head back and sucking in a sharp breath when she started kissing over the side of his neck. Pressing his right hand back, Negan braced himself against the counter when she lowered down to her knees. Caressing at the back of her head with his left hand, Negan winced when she pulled him out of the tight confines of his pants. Stroking at his girthy length had Negan’s hips bouncing forward, panting at the way she confidently caressed at his body. “Fuck…”

Brazenly she leaned forward and started pressing wet kisses at the tip of Negan’s manhood enjoying the sounds he made when she did it. Dragging her tongue out across the slit had her collecting the taste of him, his hips bouncing forward toward her. While it would have been nice to drag things out, she knew that they were in the middle of a public bathroom. In a very, very busy place. All it would take was someone downstairs coming up here to go to a less busy bathroom.

Lifting her stare, she watched Negan’s reaction when she took the tip between her lips. A moan escaped him, the vein at his neck became more prominent and his eyes fluttered to a tight close. His fingers were stronger at the back of her neck sliding in over her scalp with the wet laps of her tongue at the length of his cock.

“Fucking hell,” Negan moaned out watching her bob her head over his erection returning the gesture of what he had done for her. Curling his fingers around the counter tighter, Negan could sense that his hands were shaking. There was a want to help guide her head over his length, but he was already enjoying what she was doing on her own. “That feels so fucking good.”

Her right hand was caressing the base of his erection, matching tempo with the movements her mouth made. Her other hand was over his waist, squeezing firmly at it. His heart was hammering in his chest, his body on fire with the sensations she was drawing up inside of him. Giving herself a moment to breathe, she pulled her head back and stroked her hand firmly over his throbbing length. Focusing on the sensitive tip had Negan swallowing down hard, humming out as she easily picked up on the sensitive areas.

Moving in closer to him, she dragged her tongue out across the area at the underside of his cock where the shaft and the tip met. The sound he released was so rewarding that she continued to focus on that area noticing that it had Negan tremoring. Starting to lap her tongue at the length of him caused his hips to bounce forward.

“Please,” Negan begged drawing forth a smirk from her when she took him back into the warmth of her mouth. Doing as he pleased, she worked to continue to pleasure him. With her left hand she palmed in over his lower abdomen beneath the material of his shirt while her right continued to pump over his cock in tempo with the movements her mouth made over him. Feeling him tensing up before her, she knew that he was close to coming. The sounds of his moans grew raspier as his hips bucked up toward her throat with her eyes coming to a tight close. The first line of his cum hit the back of her throat with him clinging tightly to her. Continuing to pleasure him, she swallowed down the rest of his release. A wet sound filled the air when she pulled her lips away from his twitching cock. “Fucking hell.”

Swallowing down hard, Negan reached for her and picked her up in his arms, quick to spin her. Lifting her up, he set her down on the counter and pulled her right to the edge of it. Licking his fingertips, he dropped his hand between her thighs caressing at her already sensitive flesh. Locking his eyes, Negan hovered his mouth in over hers with the warmth of her breath causing him to shudder.

“You are fucking incredible,” Negan slurred, his thumb on his free hand dragging out across her full, wet bottom lip. A loud sound caused the both of them to jump until she realized it was the sound of her phone going off. Scrambling to grab it had Negan reaching down to push himself back into his pants. Bringing her phone up, she felt her heart skip a beat seeing who it was an alert from. “What? What is it?”

“It’s Maggie,” she lowered the phone having Negan reaching for her phone so he could look at the text she sent.

“We need to talk,” Negan read it off and waved the phone about, his brow line creasing while she hastily fixed her clothing. By her body language, Negan could tell that she was starting to get ill at ease with what they had done. “Hey, hey. Calm down.”

“Negan, stop,” she demanded with him attempting to touch her. Holding her hands up she made sure to keep the distance between them. Her breathing was loud and her body was still incredibly hot. “What we’ve done? What we keep doing? I’m a horrible person.”

“No. No, you’re not,” Negan stressed to her, working his pants back together with a loud sigh. “You have loved me for a very long time and…”

“I’m making you cheat on someone. Someone I used to call my best friend,” she was overwhelmed with the idea hearing Negan’s breathing becoming uneven. “I never believed in this kind of shit. In fact,” she paused to think about how angry she got with Maggie for cheating on Negan. “I have torn into people for doing this kind of thing. I’m no better than them.”

“Hey,” Negan called out with her heading toward the door and he wrapped his fingers around her wrist to pull her back to him. Grasping her jaw between his thumb and index finger, he urged her to look at him. “Where are you going?”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, reaching up to get Negan to lower his hand away from her face. “I can’t…I can’t do this Negan. I’ve got to go home. I’ve barely slept the last few days and I just need time alone.”

“Hey, please…” Negan pled with her, his hazel eyes visibly disappointed when she made her way to the door. “Everything I’ve said to you, I mean it.”

“I think you believe it now, but I need you to work out your shit first Negan,” she informed him, shaking her head and letting out a long sigh. “What we did today was wrong and you know that just as much as I do.”

----

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