#especially if you say you just learned about reblog etiquette

[blkkizzat]

Hi! I'm sorry to bother you with this stuff but does my page appear ageless or something? Cause i feel like i got blocked from 2 blogs just cause i followed. And they were awesome too:(

hey! so no it doesnt look like you are underage nor a bot but a lot of authors block "blank blogs" which also includes not reblogging. if you dont reblog as they feel you arent supporting them.

i mean i think tumblr only recently implemented the like system so people you follow likes show up on your dash so not a lot of people realize likes do help now. however a reblog is still going to help more in the longer run.

i personally dont block non rebloggers but i would at least like to see a non reblogger keep their likes public so i know they are interacting in someway. i dont begrudge anyone for not reblogging as when i first rejoined tumblr after years of being away i was pretty much a blank blog too as i was just casually on here a few times a week and didnt understand reblog etiquette for months lol. i know a lot of people on here who are blank dont understand that.

but as a writer i will say encouragement keeps us going. it means so much when people leave comments or reblogs with comments/tags. so if you consume content you enjoy please do consider reblogging at minimum. but to really show support please do comment or reblog with comments/tags.

here is a really good post that goes into a bit more depth and i really like this post cause it doesn't have an accusatory/rude tone but its just a really honest/raw story that accurately describes why a lot of writers choose to stop writing for lack of vocal support.

[signanothername]

How do you feel about the fandom?

I’m assuming you mean Ut/utmv?

How can I say this in the most gentle way possible hmm..

I genuinely do love the creativity within the fandom, the beautiful art and stories and ideas people come up with, the different interpretations of these characters even when i don’t agree with them or have my own thoughts/opinions, cause that’s what fandoms are supposed to, it’s all of us showing our love for these lil blorbos of ours in each of our own unique different ways

Of course, each fandom has its good and bad side, but to say the ut/utmv fandom is so damn negative to the point it’s suffocating is an understatement

I’m especially weirded out by the pro harassment behavior within this fandom, like, a mf would say “i’m anti harassment!!!!” Then turn around and post/reblog a post with +20 people name dropped to “raise awareness” for whatever little that is worth, you can “raise awareness” by messaging people privately, not make a list where an asshole can easily use it to harass people, and no, saying shit like “don’t harass these people!!!” Does not alleviate any responsibility from you if they do get harassed because of your post

That’s why messages are a thing, and only messaging those who explicitly state they want to be messaged, not jump in into people’s inboxes or messages and telling them shit out of the blue

So many people within this fandom need to learn fandom etiquette, how to mind their own business, and to use the damn block button, you’re uncomfortable with a certain subject? Tumblr has the most handy filtering system, don’t like a person/find them uncomfortable? Block them, blocking them isn’t enough and want to complain? That is what you can use your blog for, feel free to complain on your own blog to your heart’s content (not on other people’s blogs or under their posts if it’s not the subject for it) that’s what friends are for too, go to their DMs and complain till the end of time

Being just a bit bigger of an artist follower wise in comparison to other artists means that I deal with very special cases sometimes, because I’m also puzzled by the way people can get super comfortable with commanding strangers to do things they want or to break basic respectful boundaries like not getting people involved in drama even when they specifically state not to include them (me, I’m starngers, every time I reblog my boundaries post, it’s me implying that I got something that broke my very basic bitch boundaries that day, which says a lot about the fandom, cause i literally only got 4 boundaries stated damn)

That’s why I opt to not get too close to people within the fandom, and am generally careful as to who I let close to me, I’m very certain people might think I somehow have my own social circle within the fandom or have some wide connections they can never get, when in reality I’m isolated af

That being said, idk if it’s young people not knowing any better, or adults who act like children, but the fact harassment is very prominent and also very normalized within the fandom is something that definitely made me seriously think of just getting back to the Transformers fandom (one of the most chill fandoms i’ve ever been part of)

Fandom is fandom, keep it for rambling about blorbos, and learn to mind your own business <3

[wing-ed-thing]

Enemies to Lovers with Tobirama Senju

Tags: No Reader Pronouns

𓆃 It's actually surprisingly uncomplicated to go from an enemy to a lover with Tobirama, contrary to assumptions. And it's because he's an extremely logical person.

𓆃 Given that you end up proving yourself to be trustworthy, Tobirama is willing to take things of the past at face-value and weigh them against actions of the present.

𓆃 All clans, after all, were warring. And when peace was inevitably negotiated, there wasn't a single soul who had nothing to look past.

𓆃 Things might actually go smoother if you knew Tobirama prior to the foundation of the village. Seeing each other in passing on the field or even engaging on combat together would, at the very least, establish some familiarity between the two of you.

𓆃 Especially for the period, battlefield etiquette was an unspoken rule that almost everyone engaged in. And while you could expect an increase in underhanded tactics when things grew contentious, at the very least, you learned your opponent's name.

𓆃 And while Tobirama isn't one to throw out compliments to you during your altercations, the engagement itself is a testament to your strength and praise to your skill.

𓆃 He'll get oddly silent, his eyes never leaving you as he charges at you over and over with his blade. Although, this isn't to say that he's rash when it comes to you. Rather, it's the opposite.

𓆃 His gaze is dark and calculated, and his intense focus is a compliment in and of itself. It means he's taking you seriously.

𓆃 And once the village eventually comes together, building rapport with Tobirama only becomes easier, especially if your people are on board and cooperating with the effort or if you're an active participant in negotiations and/or leadership.

𓆃 It takes time, genuine interactions, and, of course, some amount of trust to break through Tobirama's hard exterior. He's fairly aloof and abrasive, but demonstrating your seriousness when it comes to the issues can gain you a powerful ally.

𓆃 Tobirama can also smell an act from a mile away, so sincerity is key to building a relationship. And no matter what your dynamic evolves into, it's one built on trust and honesty.

𓆃 It's extremely likely that Tobirama will fall first... and not know it, which leads to you noticing him around quite a bit, always finding an excuse to talk to you while also staying stand-offish and aloof.

𓆃 He tries to stay a logical as he can, but every so often his nerves will get the better of him, resulting in various fumbles or misspoken words.

𓆃 But don't be mistaken, if things start to go south with any agreements between your clans, Tobirama won't shy away from the issues and may speak with less tact than he should. But it's important to understand that his approach is logical.

𓆃 It's not something he necessarily holds against you, and he's not quick to hard assumptions, but he's also not turning a blind eye to anything that might concern him just because of his affection for you.

𓆃 After all, his family comes first.

𓆃 But given enough evidence, Tobirama is readily able to move forward on the grounds of mutual respect and understanding. He doesn't like to talk much about the past in the first place.

Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed, and supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

Notes: I had to feed my Tobirama stans a little

[some-pers0n]

What are your best Tumblr Tips™?

In general? Hm,,

Block button and filtering tags are your friends here. Do NOT be scared to press that block button. Porn blog? TERF? Person with just a headcanon that annoys you to an incredible degree? Block 'em! Cultivate your dash to your specifications

Reblog! People love reblogs! Reblogs help circulate posts and people (especially artists) like them

^ Along with this, you don't need to leave a comment or text reblog with every reblog. Tumblr etiquette says that reblogging a post with an addition is primarily done via tags

Follow accounts you like! Sounds obvious but it helps curate your dash to what you want

See a post you don't like? Leave it be. Scroll away. Block OP if anything. A lot of the times you'll see something you don't care for and you just gotta learn to move on. Maybe if it really irks you, you vaguely post and ramble about it or just go into a pal's DMs

Generally if you're friendly and nice to people, people will like you back. Shocking, I know

You don't need to be the talk of the town or anything. It's nice just getting a couple mutuals and nestling in a community or two. It's fun

[ffcrazy15]

Y'know...

I'm kinda getting just...burnt out, man. I don't know what it is, but the fanfic community these last few years has just been really difficult to engage with. There are a lot of reasons, but I think among the biggest is this: (warning: long vent incoming):

So. I've been writing fanfic for...gosh, fourteen years now. And back in the day, we had our fair share of problems, I won't lie. Now I came in after the major flame wars of the '00s, but still, there were the shipping wars and the shit-stirrers and the people who took other people having a different opinion on their faves WAY too personally.

But! There were rules of engagement. People might not have always followed them, but back then you could say to someone, "hey, you're not behaving in the way we all agree people should behave in this space. You're being a jerk." And people would either lose their shit at you and you'd block them, or they'd apologize and not do the rude thing moving forward.

This went especially for new writers/readers. They'd make a mistake, people would inform them, and they wouldn't make the mistake again moving forward. That was how we built a health community back then.

*Now: a disclaimer. I know not all new fans are like this, and to those of you who do listen when people inform you of the etiquette of fandom spaces, I want to give a sincere thank-you. The following does not apply to you.

However, and not to be an old woman yelling at the kids to get off her lawn, but:

I see people trying, politely, to tell newcomers the basic rules of engagement for how to interact in fandom. "Don't complain about things that are clearly marked in the summary or tags." "Do not get into dumb shipping wars. Ship and let ship." "Don't leave harsh or unasked-for concrit." "Don't demand updates in the comments."

And instead of saying "Oh wow, sorry, I didn't know about that, I'll do better next time"—I see some new folks responding with things like "Well this just makes me NEVER want to comment/engage/participate!"

And writers are so scared of not getting ANY engagement in this landscape of already dwindling comments and reblogs—or worse, ruining things for other writers—that they immediately capitulate and say oh, we're sorry, we shouldn't have told you you were being rude, please don't stop commenting on fics, we were in the wrong.

And I'm here to say: No. Enough! It is our job as the older citizens of this space to set the expectations for community behavior. If the new arrivals get mildly embarrassed for being politely informed (key words there) that they've committed a faux pas, then that's okay! It's a growing experience. Learning how to be polite in new social settings isn't traumatizing them or causing them emotional harm. They will survive the couple seconds of embarrassment, and then they will go on to be kinder and more conscientious citizens of the digital landscape.

Now, if you're a newcomer who is intimidated by people telling you the rules of etiquette in fandom spaces:

Look. I get it. I was new to fandom once, and I know that that can be intimidating! But sometimes there are going to be situations where you will be new to a social setting and have to awkwardly feel things out, and you will make mistakes and be corrected by others. That's just part of life. Thankfully, fandom is a space where folks have really tried to cultivate clear rules of engagement and want to hand it on to new people! There are guides on the "ao3 etiquette" tag of how to leave polite comments and interact in fandom, and there are lots of people who will help you learn the ropes if you ask them nicely.

I promise you, you have the ability to learn the rules of social etiquette in this online space. You will be able to emotionally withstand the minor embarrassment; all of us have before you, and you will too. And if you are not able to emotionally handle someone politely taking you aside and informing you that you're making some social mistakes and how to fix them, then you are not mature enough to participate in fandom spaces.

Now, for folks who've read this far and would like some quick tips on fandom etiquette, here they are. Remember, none of this advice is meant as a criticism, and if you've done some of these things without knowing better, then that's okay, we all make mistakes! This is simply to help us all have a good time in this space and build each other up as readers and writers!

"Don't like, don't read." — The most important rule of fandom. If you come across a fanfic that has something in the summary or the tags that you don't like, then do not click on that fic. If you do choose to read it anyway, you have no right to blame the author for your reading something you didn't enjoy.

"Dead Dove: Do Not Eat." — A more extreme version of "Don't like, don't read," this means that there is content in the fic that most people would find disgusting, frightening or morally objectionable. Do not read that story if you do not want to read that sort of content.

"Ship and let ship." — Other people will like different ships or romantic pairings of characters than you do. Their doing so is not an insult to you or to the characters in question. If you do not want to engage with stories/fanart/etc. of that ship, then do not read those fics, and block those tags here on Tumblr. Do not go onto other people's fics/art/etc. and tell them that they are wrong for liking that ship (This includes if you find the ship morally objectionable; see "DL:DR" and "DD:DNE" above.)

Tagging – If you are a writer, make sure to tag your story appropriately. This includes the romantic ships (indicated with a slash, / ) and the friendship ships (indicated with an & or the word "and"). It also includes things like graphic depictions of violence, non-consensual or dubiously consensual sexual content, characters who are under the age of eighteen engaging in sexual situations, and major character death. It also includes "Dead Dove: Do Not Eat" (see above), which you should include as a tag if you have content in your fic that the majority of people would find disgusting, frightening or morally objectionable.

Rating – Make sure to rate your story appropriately. If there is explicit sexual content or graphic violence in your story, it should be rated as "mature" or "explicit." Do not label it as "teen" or "general" (or K, K+ or T on FF.net). If there is any sexual content or more-than-cartoon-violence in your story, it should not be rated as "general" (or K or K+).

Bookmarking — Be aware that unless you set the bookmark to "private," the author can read any comments or tags you leave on the bookmark.

Commenting — Almost all writers love comments, and many writers depend on comments for their motivation to continue a story. Leaving comments is both a great way to show a writer that you enjoy their story, as well as provide the writer with motivation to keep writing! A comment can be as elaborate as you like and list every detail you loved about the story, or as simple as "this was good, I really liked it!" Either of those is fine. Keyboard smashes are also fine, as are emojis if you're too shy to write a full comment.

Commenting on Older Stories — Is absolutely fine, and in fact highly appreciated!

Demanding an Update — Do not, however, demand that a writer update quickly or ask them when the next chapter will be. Writers are doing this for free, and demanding an update is considered impolite at best and guilt-tripping at worst. (Examples: saying "This is really good, excited for more!" is fine, since this does not put a timed expectation on the writer. Saying "This is really good, when is the next update!" is considered mildly impolite, and simply writing "Update" is considered highly rude. It is seen as demanding another free gift right after you've received one.)

Concrit/Constructive Criticism — Different writers' mileage will vary on how much they like constructive criticism, so best practice is to check their author's notes, summary, or author page to see if they say they are okay with concrit. If they do not say so, then default to assuming they don't want concrit.

If you do provide constructive criticism, make sure to include at least two compliments as well (preferably more). State the criticism politely and briefly.

Also, be aware that an author might disagree with your advice and choose not to take it. This is not a slight against you personally, and you should not treat it as such.

Do not offer criticism that is not meant to be constructive or help the author grow in their writing skills.

Do not offer "constructive criticism" about you disliking things the author has clearly tagged or noted in the summary. That is not constructive criticism, that is just flaming. (See "DL:DR" above.)

And finally: Never Ascribe to Maliciousness What Can Be Attributed To Ignorance. — If someone is rude to you, remember that they might be new to the space and not be aware of the rules of etiquette. Politely inform them that they've screwed up, and assume that everyone is well-intentioned until they prove otherwise.

And there you have it! By following the above advice, you can help to build up a thriving fan culture of happy writers and happy readers. Remember, we're all here to enjoy our favorite works together and create fan content for them, so let's all work together to create a pleasant digital space for one another. :)

[la-pou-belle]

normally I would just put this in the tags of a critical post to keep it concise, but sadly rbs have been turned off! I guess dogpiling sucks when it happens to YOU, right? anyways,

just wanted to say that, yeah, it's proper fandom etiquette to tag things. even if they are only mentioned and then later confirmed to not actually be happening in the fic. That said ,, and before we forget, it is not a REQUIREMENT. Just as it's not a requirement for fic writers to post and share their products at all. Just as it's not a requirement to read and consume then. When people provide completely free services (like, say, writing, editing, and publishing and entire novel), and it's entirely up to you on whether or not to consume those services, it's a little weird to make extra demands, no? And especially to inflate these demands to the point of character assassination; not only dogpiling on the author, but all of the authors fandom friends, leading them to delete all of their soc med and hard crafted works in the process.

so you didn't like someone's fanfiction. and it was POPULAR fanfiction! that sucks. But arguments about transphobia, racism, pedophilia, etc. have already been well disputed in the very post I can't reblog, and I think it's abundantly clear that the author should not be punished for following established canon (i.e. Claw's canonical torture of children and Toichiro Suzuki's openly proclaimed eugenicist goals in taking over the world for "superior" ESPers) to a logical conclusion and for adding a layer of realism to the work.

It's not their fault you, quite frankly, didn't think very hard about what you saw and understood in both S1 and S2 of mob psycho. it sucks that it makes you uncomfortable. But it's not a stranger's job on the internet to completely wash their works of anything that reflect messy and uncomfortable reality to coddle you, a voluntary consumer of their media. And a fan writer absolutely should not be punished for producing a canon-universe work, when you yourself are a fan of the canon. The fan author, very obviously, does not condone transphobia, racism, pedophilia, or any other accused thing, just by depicting it in their freely made and voluntarily consumed fanwork. Just as ONE, very obviously, does not condone the torture of children, or child abuse, just by depicting it in Claw's organization and in Shou and Toichiro's relationship.

All of what I've said is about Side Quest, but it's absolutely disgusting that for some reason, the backlash over that specific fic went over mere criticisms of the work to harassing the author. Not only this, but to use the final chapter of Side Quest, and all of the produced fan art within it, as a blacklist of Twitter handles and social medias to then ALSO harass the authors fandom friends is purely unacceptable behavior. If you want an author to tag their works better, simply ask them to do so; do not harass them and their friends. If you want your "fandom" and "ship" to stay alive, you MUST learn how to dislike things normally and respectfully; otherwise, how can you expect people to continue to produce novels for free? At a minimum, you need to recognize that your fellow fans are real, live people and do not deserve targeted harassment, and if you truly believe them to be dangerous, contact a moderation team and avoid their fanworks.

on a personal level, I'm offended that you think I, and many others who genuinely enjoyed Side Quest, lack media literacy. I've always been a fan of canon compliant and divergent fics that follow canon implications to their logical conclusions, especially when that involves recognizing the problematic and uncomfortable aspects of reality. You may have watched mob psycho uncritically, but I did not, nor did I read Side Quest uncritically. I'm frustrated that these projections have led to more of my little joys and favorite thought-provoking fic becoming inaccessible to me, but mostly... I'm sad that these authors shared their works while not fully understanding how uncritical, reactionary, and ungrateful their audience truly was.

[cazador-rp]

it has been a long time since I last role-played (literally years) and I used to do it on Twitter. My question is how does it work on Tumblr? Is the rp in the dms or public via this question box or what?

Thank you if you answer

🦇❤️

Hi! 💞 as far as I've seen most roleplay here on Tumblr happen in public via ask box, you send/get sent any type of roleplay prompt or start of conversation (there are blogs who post rp memes and starters for people to reblog so that others can choose a prompt to send from the list, but it's not always required to wait for a prompt list, you can also send/get prompts and starters without having reblogged a post beforehand) and after the answer to that ask the roleplay moves forward through reblogs

Example: you send me an ask saying "Hi" and I answer to that ask with "Hello", at that point if you want to continue the rp you reblog my answer with your own continuation like "How are you", after which I reblog yours with my own continuation and so on and so forth for as long as we want

If a thread happens to get too long after a while (something that might happen, I once had an rp thread go on for months on another rp blog of mine, it was a monster of a thread) you can also make a new post starting with a "Continuation from" or something along those lines (personally I love to use, "Previously on [Name blog/Title rp thread]" but everyone uses what they prefer) with a link to the previous thread so that it starts anew and it's not too long anymore, and of course you can do that as many times as it's needed

As for roleplaying in private in the dms, to me personally it happened only once. The other blog wanted to try out some triggering themes but didn't want to write those things where everyone else could read them so we ended up roleplaying in my dms

I honestly have no idea if it's a common thing or not, but as someone who grew up roleplaying on F*ceb*ok where most rps happened in private chats (some did happen on public posts but no one wanted to risk posting things that might get reported/banned, especially with the group I used to be in where we would often indulge in dark themes, heavy angst, explicit torture and sometimes even NSFW roleplay between our characters) it's not that weird to me so usually it depends on what my roleplay partner prefers

It's very rare for me to feel embarassed or anxious about roleplaying something so I'm always ok with public rp (and yes, even public NSFW rp, though usually I put those kind of things under the read more thing)

Other than that I guess it can change from person to person, maybe some have a preference for private rp and others for public rp, I've seen some who only accept asks from mutuals and keep anon off, but usually each blog has their own rules posted for those things so it's easy to know

I've also noticed two different ways to divide between muse and mun, some people use the "/" when talking as the mun (ex, *Character does/says something* /Omg this was so fun to write XD <- second part is the mun and not the character, usually put a couple of empty lines under the rp) while others use tags (ex, *Character does/says something* *down in the tags #omfg I can't believe he did that #this was so fun to write tho #your answer was so good #idek wtf is going on anymore* and each reblog adds new tags of their own to talk outside the rp as a sort of conversation), personally I've used both depending on what my rp partner prefers (I adapt quite easily) so use whatever you feel is right for you

Now, I'm not a Tumblr rp etiquette professional so there might be things I don't know/forgot to mention/got wrong, but also it's pretty easy to learn once you get into the right circle, I remember the first time I started roleplaying (both here on Tumblr and before on the Book app) I was basically going in blind and just imitating what everyone around me was doing while barely understanding why they were doing certain things until I started learning by observing and got bolder with my own roleplay so don't worry if you don't understand/know everything right away and give yourself some wiggle room to learn and make mistakes here and there

I hope that was useful, and thanks for asking! I'm happy to be of even a little bit help 🤗💞

[drill-teeth-art]

Heeeeeyo I gotta question about when we reblog your art. I tend to comment on it in the tags as to not take away from the art itself, is that how you like it or do you not care? Also, if it has tags like saying what fandom or thing it is in would you want me to keep those in my reblog? If you need clarification about these questions, please let me know :). I tend be ignorant about larger online etiquette so it helps me to ask :)

Comments in the tags is fine! I like those a lot actually they're fun! And leaving the fandom tags in your tags is good too!

But! That's actually not really what the post was about. This post here. I wasn't trying to fish for compliments with that. Not that I don't appreciate the compliments on my work that I got in the tags there I really did! They mean a lot! The point I was trying to make is that this site has been abysmal for artists for a long time and especially lately. That I see desperate commission posts with 100 notes and only 5 reblogs that just aren't circulating. I see amazing pieces that the artist themself is so proud of that aren't circulating because people aren't reblogging. I see folks go through my blog and other artists' blogs liking every single thing they ever posted with zero reblogs or comments left. And while I firmly believe in trying to learn to love your art without outside approval because sometimes people just aren't going to give it to you and you have to figure out for yourself how to keep going, I think it's normal to want validation. To want folks to see your art. To spend a moment with it. To tell you they saw it and liked it.

That post was a cry to say reblog and say you love artists' work before they just decide to not post anymore. I know I'm going to make art for as long as I'm alive. But I'm not going to keep going through the hassle of posting if it doesn't bring in some validation. Questions. Curiosity. Appreciation.

Encourage the artists you love with a reblog or a comment because if you don't they might just stop posting because it's not worth it anymore. And I don't blame them! It only costs a moment of your time to lift another's spirit, and it sucks being around a bunch of people who won't spare that moment to encourage you.

That's what I was saying.

[bthump]

This isn’t specifically about you and more about the anons, because I’ve noticed that you sometimes get requests to respond to meta posts other people make and something about that makes me a bit uncomfortable. Since your meta posts are widely liked by a big part of this community, it sometimes feels like you’re being kinda requested to „debunk“ other meta posts. Diversity in opinions is so important for a good fandom atmosphere and some of the anons you get seem to wanna stir up hostility and I don’t like it. Since I like some of your meta posts, but also find myself agreeing with other people, I just feel weird about this dynamic, you know? How do you feel about it?

I think that's a fair concern but honestly, I don't see it as inherently a problem. This might be my 00s internet bias here lol, but I tend to view meta on a public platform as fair game for response or external commentary - which includes my own posts. My meta is here to be read by anyone who wants to, and to provoke thought and discussion, and that's generally what I assume of others' meta as well.

Like I recognize that attitudes have changed in the era of mostly unmoderated spaces and reblogs and the lack of diverse comms with their own norms and discourse running rampant lol, and so it's often considered automatically rude to disagree with people now, but I think that can only extend so far. Like, I don't reblog posts just to disagree with them (unless they're a friend and I know they're cool with discussion) because I know it sucks when you keep getting notes from people who are liking or reblogging the take you disagree with, but I don't think that should mean not discussing other people's meta at all, as long as it's done respectfully of course.

And I understand why someone might want a second opinion on something they read. I think everyone should think for themselves and form their own opinions, and I completely agree that diversity of opinion is important in any fandom. But not everyone has confidence in their own analysis, or the learned skills for criticism, and I think it's reasonable to seek out other viewpoints and decide which seems most correct to you, or use them as boucing off points to figure out what you believe. I definitely don't want to be the only Berserk meta blog out there, and I'm more than happy to agree to disagree with most people. I'm not an authority on the story lol and people are free to agree or disagree with me however they see fit.

That said, I'm always a little wary about tone and intent, especially in Berserk fandom, because I'm not here to get into arguments and I try to make that clear. But I take most asks in good faith. Sometimes I might go a little too far with that lol, but honestly I'd rather come across as naive than hostile. If I found out that someone was trying to start a fight between me and someone else, or was using my posts to dunk on someone else, or if followers of mine took it as a cue to harass someone, I'd absolutely say something and stop answering those asks. (Hopefully we're all chill enough over here that this doesn't happen, btw. As far as I'm aware I've never incited anything like that and I've personally only ever seen fandom arguments started by people mad about Griffith fans existing, but tbf I also don't pay attention to whatever's happening outside of my dash.)

But yeah I don't think that's what's happening here, and I don't want to assume someone's trying to start shit unless there's clear evidence for that. Like in the last ask I got like this, the anon did specify that they agreed with the post they wanted me to comment on, and were just seeking more opinions/wondering what my own take was, and I think that's reasonable.

Idk, this is definitely one of those things where I know there are different valid opinions about etiquette. But I generally abide by the 'do unto others' rule, including here. I blog with the expectation that anyone can read what I write and agree or disagree, and that I might inspire other discussion. Sometimes I get nervous about being linked to notably hostile fan spaces, like the berserk reddit, but it has happened with virtually the same motivation as those anons (what do you guys think of this person's take?) and ultimately I'm fine with it, and even a little flattered.

All that said, at the end of the day I do think that it would be best for anyone who sends an ask referencing someone else's analysis to be specific about what they want to know, rather than a general 'what do you think of this?' question. Both because it shows why you're asking and what you're interested in and leaves less room for doubting your motivation, and because it makes it easier to answer.

[mercurytomato]

Oh i love this kind of tags, especially when you guys notice and write something about my arts which i didn't understand or didn't mean to be like this. I mean, in this case, when i started to draw the picture with Noah and the shadow i was just "okay, little people, the bid shadow, and make it all crooked and chaotic." I didn't think about it like this person says! I mean, not in the language of words!! But i meant it through my picture anyway, just through the visual language. And to read this translation is always kind of magic to me, because it means that people can see the idea i subconsciously put into my drawings. Which is haha great!!

Aaaaah love when this kind of things happens 🥰

(and sorry I'm not sure about the tmblr etiquette, is it correct to post someone's tags under reblog, and should i post it with the name or without.... I'm just learning...)

[notaclassicist]

Read the book, enjoyed it. I will now proceed to outline my personal criticisms here because I am nothing if not an annoying reblogger who doesn't know anything about reblog etiquette.

The author clearly intended to spread a toxic message (whether she would consider it toxic or not) with this book. Did she succeed? Not really, to be honest. When reading the novel, never did it cross my mind that the moral of the story was "some traumas can never heal." But that was her intention, and learning that from her interviews after reading and liking the book really leaves a sour taste in the mouth.

The first 2 chapters focused very nicely on the 4 roommates and their separate internal conflicts as well as their dynamic together. The next 19? Not so much. As the first article OP linked mentions, after the very outset of the book everything kind of just falls away and the entire novel becomes The Biography of Jude St Francis, Featuring His Boyfriend. While I do like his relationship with Willem and all its interesting complexities, I really do wish JB's and especially Malcolm's story were explored a lot more. I can't help but notice the two main characters by the end are the white guy and "racially ambiguous" guy, whereas the black characters are completely sidelined.

The fact that the book is written by a woman with a majority female audience doesn't make the sex scenes featuring an adolescent boy sit any better with me. There, I said it.

Weird vibes about gay people. I don't trust any author who exclusively writes books about a group they don't belong to. Straight women, looking at you. I know the author of A Little Life is not straight. However, she still exclusively writes books about gay men. I mean, I'm not joking. She has 3 books. All 3 are about gay men. 2 feature sexual assault prominently. None of them mention a single woman in their Wikipedia summaries. Her third book is literally a retelling of a work which was originally about a girl and her father, and she rewrote the girl into a gay man. The most important woman in the entirety of A Little Life is either Julia or Ana, which is really really sad considering (a) they each speak about 5 lines and (b) they're both mother figures to a (male) victim of sexual assault. I'm just saying. Rancid vibes.

Probably more I could think of but it's late so I'm dipping for now lol

A LITTLE LIFE, Hanya Yanagihara, insincere trauma narratives, and performative "realism"

Trigger warnings: discussions of CSA, sexual assault, mental health, ableist rhetoric❗❗❗Please read with care or scroll past.

Every time someone praises A Little Life on my tl, I think of how the author once gave an interview where she said she wanted to depict that there are certain forms of trauma you can never recover from, that shall leave you "irreparably damaged", that shall render healing impossible. And then, she chose to make the protagonist a young, disabled, traumatized gay man and survivor of sexual assault. I know there is this specific sort of flowery MFA style writing and "radical exploration of grief" that gets the litfic girls all trussed up and excited about it, plus the endless discussions of "it was soooo beautifully written!!! writing is not endorsing!!" but. But what a story to tell chronically disabled people, to tell queer people, to tell survivors of sexual assault that your happiness in life is brief and ephemeral, and your destiny is looped inextricably with death, loss and endless pain.

There is a very fine line between explorations of grief and misery porn. It reminds me of another novel I read, Push, by Sapphire. It also had a disabled Black woman, a CSA survivor and did NOT shy away from depicting the horrors and how institutions fail marginalized people. But the quote I took back from it was when the character was reading The Color Purple, and someone berated the novel for being too idyllic and devoid of realism, to which the lead responded, "I don't know what realism is, but I do know what reality is and it's a motherfucker." To her, The Color Purple represented a semblance of hope, that despite Celie's trauma seeming to cause "irreparable" damage, she survives, finds love, flourishes. As does Precious, our narrator.

There is no objective opinion I'm making here, because I am not a believer that traumatic queer stories should not exist, or that all queer fiction should turn into mindless soapy Hallmark gentrified fluff with queernorm universes and rainbow hair and wishful endings. But when I read a book, I ask myself what the author meant by writing this. I don't truly believe that authors are ever without a specific aim; even Joyce's semi-mocking attempts to mystify his readers via the Ulysses's denseness, or Samuel Beckett's practically mystifying The Unnameable is a kind of concealed motive.

When questioned as to why she often chooses CSA as a subject in her works, Hanya answered in a 2015 interview: "sexually abusing a child is the ultimate abuse of power.....I think it ruins people.....in the long road to defining oneself as a human, [the survivor] must also negotiate around an enormous and often immovable rock." [x]

Also, in reference to refusing to put content warnings for survivors or traumatized readers from further getting harmed, she said, in the same interview:

"To try to preemptively shield yourself from an experience — to say, in essence, this book is about something that I fear is going to really upset me, so I’d better protect myself by not exposing myself to it at all — is not only limiting, but also means you might be preventing yourself from experiencing something else...."

Finally, and most horrifically, she has this to say about writing Jude, her protagonist's never ending arc of debilitating misery and losses:

"One of the things I wanted to do with this book is create a character who never gets better. And, relatedly, to explore this idea that there is a level of trauma from which a person simply can’t recover. I do believe that really, we can sustain only a finite amount of suffering....So much of this book is about Jude’s hopefulness, his attempt to heal himself, and I hope that the narrative’s momentum and suspense comes from the reader’s growing recognition — and Jude’s — that he’s too damaged to ever truly be repaired, and that there’s a single inevitable ending for him."

I have spoken of trauma before, and I have also (sometimes justifiably) received hatred for my cynical outlook on linear trauma recovery, the kind perpetuated on Tumblr through collages of sunlight and bread and oranges and how Miss Honey is an ideal victim and not Vanessa from My Dark Vanessa. But when I read this quote, I know Hanya Yanagihara wasn't trying to be kind to her protagonist or even making any nuanced attempt of showing the ugliness of trauma. She wasn't trying to show a genuine portrayal of grief and loss either. What she was trying– and what she succeeded at– is a grotesque tableau of horror through the meanest, lowest exploitation of my pity: a tableau marked by putting disabled, queer and survivor bodies on the chopping block.

It's not some radical or revolutionary revelation to be told I will not make it because I survived SA or child abuse beyond human tolerance. It is not subversive to be told my destiny is inevitable because of the pain wrought on my body. We are told that everyday, by the ableists, by the eugenists, by the people in medicine and psychiatry Hanya so claims to hate and reject.

I have read some deeply tragic historical/contemporary queer fiction, but not one of them took such a vouyeristic pleasure in the portrayals of pain as A Little Life. I'm sorry to all the Jack Edwards and Dakota Warren crowd, and I'm happy for you, if this book gave you comfort, made you feel seen, or even impacted you positively any way, but to me, it is still a textbook example of misery porn.

Here is a really good essay about the manufacturing of pity and hideous pain in Jude's narrative:

And here, I highly recommend this succinct review/essay of the novel by trans queer critic Andrea Long Chu, an essay which went on to win the Pulitzer Prize in 2023. Not that the Pulitzer means shit anymore, but like. Get her again for me.

And finally, if you read this, donate to my Ko-Fi, especially if you are A Little Life fan. I wrote this essay to get things off my chest but I do not appreciate people teaching me about media literacy and nuance, and forcing me to divulge my own trauma, because you cannot take criticism of your favourite novel.

[adj4mp]

Writing, Blogging, Speaking

Part of the job for any politician is communicating the ideas they have.

They have to persuade people to vote for them.

They have to convince people in parliament that the policies they want are more beneficial than costly.

They have to give speeches and addresses.

They need to represent themselves, their constituents, and their country.

As with my post on practicing reading this blog represents an opportunity to practice my writing. Preparing the things that I would want other people to hear me say.

I try my best to get to the point and be precise. But I worry that sometimes I let things go on for too long.

I am starting to learn about the expectations of the chamber, the rules of etiquette, and the necessity for every individual to recognise other members and their contributions. With everyone doing such things it can be seen as a failure or a slight to forget to do this yourself.

This is why everyone wants to give their input on the king's speech, rarely will speakers have something especially new or enlightening to say on the subject but not giving a speech can be seen as apathy or disdain for proceedings.

If you do not thank or comment on other contributions were you listening? If you cannot comment on the emotional weight someone else brings do you not care? If you only deliver prepared words is it really you that's speaking?

I would be delighted if I could shake politics to the core with my contributions, I certainly have the desire for that, but I have a feeling the required rhetoric and filler is not worth my energy to fight.

I think I'm developing skills, I definitely feel like I am developing my own style and I feel less stiff in my words, though my editing still needs work. I consider structure, metaphor and rhetoric. I may overuse techniques like the rule of three, triplets and some third thing (ha my first intentional joke).

Unfortunately, practice only makes something easier, if you practice something that is wrong you just make it a wrong thing that you can do without thinking. Improvement comes with introspection often aided by external critique.

So what does that mean for my writing practice? More of the same for sure I don't want to uproot my blog completely at this point, it's still providing plenty of opportunities for me to write. I still want to blog my progress and comment on what I'm doing on a given day or discuss my plans, though the amount of planning/housekeeping posts may decrease over time. I will discuss things that matter in the moment filling my queue with posts I don't consider overly time-sensitive but interesting enough to write about. I will continue using this as a diary of my progress and a portfolio of my capacity to do the work.

As for changes, it would be worthwhile to look at my old posts occasionally, there may be times when a reblog with amendments, corrections, new information. I may even rewrite things into more of a parliamentary speech format or argue the other sides of the discussion with myself as I learn more perspectives. This will let me grow as a writer, see how much I've changed but also acknowledge where I've been imperfect.

[kaoarika]

I feel like I'm the last person to vent/rant about this (because I have made the same "mistake" in the past), but ppl should REALLY learn fandom etiquette on social media, especially concerning "ship hate".

Like, if you dislike a ship SO badly... why even posting it AND tagging it with the ship name? Why even tagging it with the character names? Why QRT'ing a ship fanart with your opinion AGAINST the ship? OR replying it, or reblogging it and basically saying "this is wrong and you are wrong for liking it :)" esp. if the ship means NO harm to YOU? sending anon asks about "this is the low bar, bestie <3, there are better options, i swear". NO ONE ASKED YOUR OPINION, lmao? (especially doing so behind an anon ask)

Also, ALSO... filter your social media experience? The mute/block list for words and tags IS RIGHT THERE! It will make your day better, ifstg.

I know your twt/tumblr blog IS your space and all, but you can also vague about it? You can censor the name of the ships and/or characters, even and the entire website isn't going to track down your post?

It's just annoying me because I have read very silly takes (like, REALLY silly takes) and i'm like, "chill out, this is a fictional ship that is not even canon, my dude? let ppl enjoy their thing instead of invading their spaces and giving them your opinion about them?"

(this isn't even about the an*ti/p*ro discourse, it's your very typical ship discourse???)

I have never seen this type of silly and trivial ship discourse in AGES (maybe the few last fandoms I was in were more chill? or perhaps they are/were more active in twt and I definitely cut my interaction with broader fandoms in anitwt), and it happens to happen in THE ONE popular media I AM into right now.

[pyjamacryptid]

Oh I thought you were shipping the bbc versions because a post you reblogged had the x version tagged, glad that’s not the case & thank you for explaining ^^

Lol I had a feeling there was context behind why you asked but I couldn’t fathom what, because I certainly don’t ship them, in bbcm or otherwise 😆 I thought “I may as well infodump about arthuriana like the nerd I am”.

I can totally see why you were confused, though! I’ve been in the same boat lol

The use of the [blank] x [blank] tags have confused me so much recently, if I’m being honest, especially on gifsets and stuff like it. Because when I was first learning fandom etiquette, lingo and what-have-you, the x was equivalent to a / (slash) and indicated a romantic ship. On the other hand, the & (ampersand) indicated a platonic relationship.

After a while, I’ve kind of gathered the ‘x’ is being used, kind of, as a huge umbrella symbol for pairings in general (no matter the relationship)??? Maybe? At least with gifsets etc on tumblr. Idk I’m still a little confused tbh because I still see the X used as I originally learned how elsewhere, all the same. So, with it no longer having an exact definition, I get a little lost lmao. I can imagine there’s likely an archival/tagging reason behind it but I can only guess.

Anyway, yeah! Thank you for sending an ask to clarify before anything else and I’m always happy to answer! 🥰

EDIT:

Because I feel it’s important to say, I just wanted to add that fandom’s use of language and shorthand is open to change like any language is. For example, Spock and Kirk’s romantic ship was (and still is) referred to as simply K/S. Now, it’s also known as spirk. So, from what I’ve seen on Tumblr lately anyway, it’s very likely that the use of the ‘x’ in place of a slash is changing and is no longer definitive to only romance, like it used to be. Also, some people may just not be aware of the meanings behind fandom shorthand too! Always a possibility. Fandom’s always growing and changing and you don’t exactly get a manual at the entrance lol

[the-bulletproof-heart]

This reblog sums up really well why I take issue with OP's sentiment.

More rules aren't going to make things better. First of all, etiquette differs greatly across different cultures. In some cultures, it is considered rude to make eye contact, but in others, it is considered respectful. In some places, it is considered polite and friendly to smile at strangers, but in other places, this is considered creepy.

Sure, hypothetically we could say that young people in every culture should be taught their own culture's etiquette, but even within the same country, etiquette differs based on which part of the country you are in and each individual's social and cultural background. Many countries, especially America, have large populations of immigrants from around the world.

To insist that there should be a uniform set of "rules" about social interaction is not only morally absurd, it is impossible on a practical level.

I'm going to give OP the benefit of the doubt and assume that their sentiment was not written out of malice towards any one group, but this is the problem with insisting that everyone in society obey the same set of rules. Not everyone views the world in the same way, nor should they. What is polite to some people is going to be considered rude to others. Heck, I remember being raised to call adults "sir" and "ma'am", but some adults in my life took offense to this because it made them feel old.

I also think it is extremely problematic to blame mental health issues such as social anxiety purely on social factors. I'm sure some people with anxiety would benefit from a change in social conditions, but at the end of the day, many people with mental illness and neurodivergence are born that way.

I have suffered from OCD for most of my life. I first started having intrusive thoughts when I was 6 or 7 years old. Because I had no context or understanding of why my brain was acting the way it was, I developed severe anxiety. I was raised in a religious household and many of my intrusive thoughts were sacrilegious in nature. I would spend hours praying and begging God to fix me. I developed extreme anxiety because I became convinced that everyone around me could secretly read my mind and see all of the horrible thoughts I was plagued with. Learning etiquette rules would not have helped me at all in this situation. In fact, it would likely have made my anxiety worse, because I would have constantly feared deviating from the "rules" and further ostracizing myself.

As I got older, I did end up getting help for my anxiety. You know what helped me the most? Being diagnosed and receiving proper medication! I still suffer from intrusive thoughts, but they aren't nearly as prominent and do not cause me anxiety like they used to.

If there is one thing I hope potential readers take away from this reblog, it is that social factors are not solely responsible for mental illness. Can they contribute? Sure. But mental illness should be treated like a health issue just as any other physical ailment.

social anxiety could easily be attributed to the breakdown of the social fabric. there's no code of etiquette anymore. multiple generations were never taught how to introduce themselves or cultivate manners and traditions that hinge on a social life, everyone's awkwardly stumbling around hoping they'll be met with someone more courageous and eloquent than themselves to start a conversation and burst their lonely timid bubble.

[pespillo]

i know i just reblogged a tumblr field guide and all but i need to tell you things that ive learned in my 11 years here:

popularity does exist in tumblr but its not guided by how many followers you have it is based on the amount of asks you probably get and the metric of it is that youll get some insane asks in here if you Just Wait, from invasive questions to people asking you what do you think of the death penalty in america when you have a blog about My Hero Academia , to bait questions or copypastas that been passed for half a decade about an user called Amegaotaku that youll have to research to even understand what the hell it means . "Popular" people of tumblr can remake their blogs constantly but what matters is that you have people who Wont Shut Up and engage conversation with you, especially through asks, when people want your attention, theyll probably send you an ask.

this doesnt happen as often as it did in the mid 2010s but embarassing yourselves in public is incredibly easy in this site if you Throw Yourself to the wolves, as in , you impulsively add onto a conversation with an addition thats often done emotionally, carelessly, or literally misinterpreting the intent of a post itself because you took it personally. this literally never goes well especially if you engaged with a post from an user who has Very reactive followers, because while i doubt youll get threats or such, youll still probably get hounded in the replies and this site´s social rules are extremely lax with the words you are allowed to say. While a whole "we need to be kind to eachother" approach IS the reasonable solution, it is much better to not engage with innocous posts that piss you off if you are aware that the average tumblr user doesnt have any tact whatsoever and is bloodthirsty for a punching bag, they are mostly teens after all, and adults that dont have positive social role models. Screenshot the post that pisses you off and talk about it in your own new post to discuss it with your actual fellow people.

if youre gonna be interested in interacting with posts relating to race, politics, gender or such, be expected to at least list your race and gender (or whether youre exempt from transmisogyny or not) , encroaching into intracommunity issues and trying to add or say anything when its none of your business or you literally dont know what it entails is not wise. also posts and listings about how to "listen to (insert marginalized group)! " from teenagers are really unneded here because theres already so many in depth resource posts in here made by qualified activists, historians, researchers and more, and they been shared for years, or twitter/instagram posts have been literally just regurgitating stuff from HERE. NOTE: i reccomend making sideblogs for this stuff, NOT DISCOURSE BLOGS but just sideblogs where youre not just mixing Supernatural posting and Protest Bills for 2023 , or better, keep all your political talk and engagement in your main blog and use a sideblog for fandom, if you get enough followers in any of these your reach for important posts can be bigger, thats why i reblog donation posts or commission posts in here at times.

A lot of posts abt Tumblr Etiquette or whatever will tell you that you need to engage constantly and all and make your own posts and tag everything or else youll be treated as a Bot, but you dont really, when i joined tumblr in 2012 i lurked for 3 years and just reblogged posts without much mind or even posting much, but there was no expectation of me to do anything than to just look around , and its fine, i think if i said anything thru my early teens it would have been a disaster considering how much my late teens were, it would have made it worse, you dont need to say anything if you dont wanna, you dont need to form any sort of persona here or talk to people if its not your thing and youre young or not , maybe you wanna learn the ropes first and learn "the culture" before diving in, maybe you just like to observe what happens without having to participate, whatever it is this site is just what you make of it.