#especially ice cream type desserts like how the fuck did i not hear about this

[epiphainie]

is this a safe space to admit that i didnt know what spumoni was till buck and tommy shared one?

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

Noona, Do You Not Like Younger Men? (Choi San+Jung Wooyoung)

Pairing: Choi San× Milf! Reader (Female)× Jung Wooyoung

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Idol AU.

Summary: Maybe going over to pester their favorite manager during her vacation wasn't such a bad idea, especially if it ends up with them getting what they always fantasized about every night.

Word Count: 4.2+K

Warnings: Age differences (still within legal boundaries), breast play including titty fucking (yeah I'm aware some of us don't have huge tits, I'm part of that squad but we can dream ok?) fingering, m+f+m threesome, ass grinding, spanking, degradation.

Taglist: @little-precious-baby @galaxteez @multidreams-and-desires @yunhofingers @yunhoiseyecandy @deja-vux @daniblogs164 @brie02 @couchpotatoaniki @a-soft-hornytiny

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Y/N's eyes squinted at the two younger males who casually showed up at her home, uninvited and already letting themselves in as if they owned the place.

"Hi Noona. Did you miss us?" The older one of the two squished her cheeks together, earning him a slap on his wrist, which he did not appreciate.

"Aww Noona, now look what you've done. You made him sad." The other male pointed to the other's pout.

"Choi San and Jung Wooyoung, just what the hell do you think you're doing here?" She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Isn't it obvious? We came to keep you company!" San cheerfully exclaimed.

"We know you missed us so we decided to come over and spend time with our favorite manager." Wooyoung added as he went over to try and cling an arm around the older woman, but she brushed his hand away.

"Ok, in case you guys didn't know, I'm on vacation, a well needed vacation from my manager duties. Specifically from you two! You little brats who constantly give me migraines and high blood pressure. I got this vacation to get away from you both!"

The boys were taken aback by her outburst, looking back and forth between each other and then returned their faces back to her. Their somber and disappointed expressionism soon bursted out in laughter, confusing the woman in front of them.

"Oh Noona! You're so funny." San giggled.

"We know you love and adore us so much. And you're happy that we came to keep you company!" Against her will, and more since she was outnumbered, she let Wooyoung and San each take one of her arm and drag her over to the living room where they sat her down and started arranging the space so they could have a small movie day. Y/N let out slow and deep breaths as she tried not to lose her patience and just let the boys run around her house as they started putting the snacks they brought with them into bowls. She could hear them muttering angrily to each other from the kitchen, no doubt telling each other to be careful less they accidentally broke one of her plates. In less than 10 minutes, they had about  7 or 8 different bowls full of different snacks, ranging from crispy chips, to sour gummy worms and even different types of sweet chocolates.

"We even got mochi ice cream! Would you like some?" Wooyoung enthusiastically shoved the case that contained assorted flavors of the icy dessert.

Knowing she might as well enjoy the gluttonous snacks while she could, Y/N skimmed her hand over them and picked out one of the mint chocolate mochis and stuffed it in her mouth. Unbeknownst to her, the man on her right was staring at her with a wide smile as she ate the ice cream. When she noticed, she gave him a puzzled look and scooted further away from him.

"You chose the mint chocolate flavor." He giddily stated.

"Yes....any problem with that?" She questioned.

San emitted happy squeals at that.

"I love mint chocolate flavor too! Don't you see Noona? This further proves that were soulmates and destined to be together!"

Without even asking or warning, he snuggled himself against her, an arm around her waist as he used her chest as a makeshift pillow. Coming back from the kitchen, Wooyoung glared at San when he saw how close he was with their manager.

"Hey! No fair. Don't hog Noona up for yourself. We promised to share!" He quickly jumped on the other side and tried to tangle himself around her, proving to be difficult when San was pushing him away. Y/N ended up being pulled and tugged from both sides as the boys fought amongst themselves for her. Fed up with their antics, she reached her hands over and smacked both of their thighs sharply, making them retreat away from her less they suffered more physical pain from her.

"I want both of you to stay at least an arm's length away from me if you're planning to stay here and watch a movie. And absolutely under no circumstances do I want either of your mouths opening to sputter nonsense and annoy me further...Got it?!"

Both of the idols scooted to either ends of the couch, each grabbing a nearby cushion to keep them company and to protect them in case they furthered irritated their off duty manager. Y/N took a deep breath as she rubbed the side of her temples, letting the boys pick out which movie they wanted to watch. She probably wouldn't even enjoy the movie with the two rascals nearby, she thought to herself. Wooyoung and San settled for a cute looking movie, both of them hoping that the fluffy contents would soften up Y/N so they could cuddle up next to her once more. The woman however cringed when she saw the title.

"Ugh. Wake me up when whatever chick flick you chose is over." She settled back onto the couch, her eyes already closing.

"Aww come on Noona, give it a try. You might even like it." San suggested.

"Romantic movies have never been my type." She mumbled out, her hand reaching out to take some of the popcorn on the table to stuff in her mouth.

The movie played out exactly as she expected it to. Nothing short of all the typical cliches and stereotypes portrayed on every single romantic comedy made in existence. The boys would often look back at her every few minutes, their faces getting more and more discouraged when their manager didn't seem to be enjoying their company. It seemed that their plan to get close to her backfired as she was currently resting her chin on her palms, dozing off slowly while not paying one bit of attention on the screen in front of her.

"Told you to pick a scary movie." San complained to his friend.

"Your chicken ass can't even handle them." Wooyoung side eyed him.

"Yeah, but jump scares serve as an excuse to hug the person next to you." He tilted his head over to Y/N.

"Nice move, saying your plan out loud for her to hear. You dumbass."

Taking the pillow he had, San chucked it at Wooyoung, knocking the snacks he was currently eating onto the floor. Grabbing the pillow, he made move to throw it once more, but Y/N held a hand up.

"Throw that cushion and I will choke you Jung Wooyoung."

The warned boy immediately sat the cushion back down, setting his hands down on his lap.

"Please do...."

Y/N's half lidded eyes sprung wide open when she heard his whisper. Slowly she turned her head at him, of course Wooyoung noticed out of the corner of his eye and swallowed harshly. He didn't think she was paying attention enough to hear him, but she was. Wooyoung soon felt flushed as she eyed him with an indiscernible stare, trying desperately to focus his attention on the movie in front of him but the heavy weight of her stare kept burning through him. Seeing as he wasn't going to say or do anything else, Y/N decided it would be fun to tease him like he'd often tease her. Sliding on top of him, to the surprise of not only Wooyoung but his friend on the other side, Y/N hummed softly as her fingers ran up his chest.

"Please do what Wooyoung? Choke you? Is that what you want? Want my hand wrapped around that pretty of neck of yours?"

The flustered male shuddered when her fingers encapsulated over the front of his neck, lightly applying pressure against his Adam's apple with her palm.

"Oh someone likes this a little too much." She chuckled as she subtly rolled her hips on his tent that formed as soon as she touched him.

"Please Noona.." Wooyoung squirmed underneath her body, hips trying to grind up against hers.

"I barely did anything and you're already begging for me. You're an even bigger whore than I thought you were." She let out an annoyed 'tsk' as she slowly began to get off his lap.

When Wooyoung felt her detaching herself, his hands came out to clasp her waist, keeping her firmly planted on his lap.

"Yes I am, I'm such a whore for you Noona. But please don't leave me here like this." He whined at her, looking completely pitiful as his hands desperately tried to keep her from moving. Y/N reached a hand out to toss some of the hair away from his forehead, her mind already working on ways to play around with the young male. Noticing that his eyes kept falling towards her chest, she suddenly got an idea.

"You like my breasts Wooyoungie?"

Her question caught him off guard, eyes widening, looking like a deer caught in headlights, especially after she called him by his nickname. He was beyond flustered, unable to look up at his manager anymore.

"I asked you a question Wooyoungie and I expect an answer or else I'll leave you hanging there and make you watch as I play with Sannie instead."

The forgotten male beside them became excited at hearing her words, his hand rubbing against his inner thigh, slowly creeping up to the bulge in his pants. Tilting his chin up to look at her, Y/N repeated her question once more, expecting him to reply as it was his last chance.

"Y-yes. I like your breasts very much Noona." He finally admitted.

Satisfied at getting an answer, Y/N pulled away from Wooyoung so she could start removing her shirt, both boys watching her without batting an eyelash. When her bra dropped on the floor, they both stared in awe at her voluptuous chest, mouths agape and nearly drooling at the sight.

"Fuck, they're just-wow." San chimed in, tongue wetting the center of his lips.

"You like them too Sannie? I always thought you were more of an ass guy." She commented with a knowing smile, recalling all the times he'd come up behind her and greet her with a pat on her bum.

"Oh hell yeah I am, but I'd never say no to an opportunity to suck on a pretty pair of tits." He acknowledged with no hesitation.

"Is that so? Well then."

Prying Wooyoung's hands off her, Y/N sat herself back in between the boys, hands cupping both of her breasts to gently massage them in her palms, fingers tweaking at her nipples which were slowly getting fully erect. The two men at her sides watched with hungry eyes, only imagining how soft and tender her breasts must feel, both wanting to replace her hands with their own. Unbeknownst to them, they were about to get a better offer.

"There's one for each of you my loves, so go ahead. Put your pretty mouths on them and suck on them. And maybe if you do good enough, I'll play more with you guys."

Wooyoung and San simultaneously looked at one another, both wondering if they heard her correctly or it was another perverted thought their mind played on them. Realizing it was not, San was the first one to be bold as he cupped the breast nearest to him and brought it up to his lips, where he proceeded to coat the areola with spit before he latching onto it.

"So you're more of a dirty boy, aren't you Sannie?" She mused at him, fingers brushing some of the bangs on his face.

San only responded by lifting his eyes momentarily to shoot a wink her way before indulging back in his task of suckling on her tit. Y/N turned her attention to Wooyoung, who was still nervously sitting there in a pliant manner. She beckoned for him to come closer.

"Wooyoungie, my other breast feels lonely."

Getting the hint, Wooyoung lowered himself and practically squished his face into her fleshy mound. As expected, he was very vocal, spewing out lewd sounds as he harshly sucked on her nipple, bringing in as much of her as he could possibly put in his mouth. Y/N laid her head back on the top of the couch, mouth drawing out heavy breaths and pants as she relaxed and enjoyed the sensation of the the younger male's mouths on her breasts, their tongues and teeth eagerly swirling and nibbling on her sensitive flesh. She noticed how both of them had completely different patterns. Whereas San's suckling was less intense, it was definitely more sloppy, spit dribbling down his chin and down her chest from all the insane movements his tongue worked on her nipple, each of them clearly focused on bringing her as much pleasure as possible. Wooyoung was definitely more intense and full of eagerness, but each swirl of his tongue or nibbling on her skin was less meditated and more like he was simply enjoying to taste the older woman, playing around with her breast as if it was a toy for him to fondle and tease as he pleased. Not that she minded, she loved being used as a toy by them both.

She became so lost in the feeling of their mouths on her body that she didn't notice the hands that had traveled in between her thighs until she felt them prying them open in an effort to slide her shorts and underwear down. She became somewhat self conscious when they managed to tear the rest of her clothing off, her legs closing tightly. Tapping a finger on her knee, San pulled off her nipple to say:

"Spread your legs for us and let us see that soaking cunt of yours."

Wooyoung was just as shocked as she was at his informal and vulgar words, but it certainly served to arouse her even more. Getting talked down to by someone younger than her..... it was definitely something. Giving him what he, and probably also his friend, wanted, she opened up her legs. Putting aside her gorgeous breasts for the meantime, the 2 pairs of eyes peered down at the sight below them, their Noona's folds glistening just for them and because of them, her tiny bud aching to be touched by their fingers. Signaling to his friend, San dipped his fingers down, swirling them around her clit before pressing down on it.

"Oh she's needy Wooyoung, I can feel it throbbing against my finger." San smirked as he lightly rubbed against her clit.

"Is our pretty Noona in need of our fingers? Does she want to get stuffed with them?" Wooyoung muttered against her ear, lips quick to muffle the moan that responded to his question. It was a sweet and tender kiss that was interrupted by San who tilted her chin towards him so that he could kiss her as well.

"Don't worry Noona. We'll make sure you're full and satisfied."

Y/N gasped as she felt both of their fingers slowly insert themselves into her slick and wet walls. Nudging to each other, their fingers started moving to and fro, eyes watching closely each facial expression that took over her features, reveling in the blissful sighs that were spilling out of her lips. Y/N couldn't keep herself from clenching tightly around their fingers, mesmerized by the sight of both of them fingering her tight little hole.

"Are you enjoying this Noona? Like having your tight pussy fucked by Sannie's finger and mine?" Wooyoung giggled, pushing his finger deeper into her, knuckles pressing against her mound which had her shuddering.

"Yes she is Wooyoungie, look at how much tighter she's becoming."

With a mischievous twinkle in his eye, he looked at Wooyoung.

"Maybe we should stretch her out even further. Don't you think?" He suggested, to which Wooyoung agreed to with a grin.

With a sharp inhale, Y/N released a whimper when 2 extra fingers intruded into her intimate region, stretching her further. The pace with which they were thrusting their fingers into her increased, each of the boys jamming their fingers at different timings, making sure that their tips touched the hood of her sex, grazing that sweet spot of hers. Y/N was a whining and moaning mess. The boys were not giving her any chance to relax, when one set of fingers was pulling out of her, the other set was pushing back in, continuing its abuse on her g-spot. She felt her thighs starting to trembling, her lower stomach building up her climax by the second. Even with the 4 fingers parting her wide open, she was starting to squeeze around them, wrapping them up in a blanket of heat that would soon coat them with her release.

"Are you gonna cum Noona? Cum on Sannie's and my fingers?" Wooyoung cooed as he drove his fingers faster into her to help her reach her orgasm faster.

Y/N could only manage to nod slightly, eyes shutting tight, unable to register anything else save for the slippery and squealching sounds that came from between her thighs. She didn't feel San press his lips against her ear until his low voice spoke in that sexy satoori accent of his.

"Cum for us Noona. Cum all over us."

With his encouragement, she tipped over the edge, crying out loudly as her release started streaming down her body and onto their hands, dripping even down to their wrists. The boys were kind enough to continue filling her hole with their fingers, helping her ride out her orgasm until she came down from her high.

"Shit. Look at all the mess you made on us. Such a dirty dirty Noona." San taunted as he forced her to look down at their cum covered hands, which they both brought up to lick clean right in front of her.

"And you taste so delicious." Wooyoung added with star struck eyes.

Cupping both of their chins, she placed a peck on each of their lips.

"Thank you for that my darling boys, you made Noona feel amazing. It's only right Noona makes you both feel just as good."

Not forgetting about the throbbing needs in their pants, she ordered them to strip in front of her, an order they were eager to comply with. Through clumsy fumbling, a pile of clothes was added to the previously discarded garments from the woman in front of them. Y/N couldn't hide the satisfaction on her face as she gazed at their erect cocks, standing proudly, waiting to be touched and played with.

"Well I suspected my boys were big, but even the reality is nothing like what I imagined." The men flushed at her words, flattered by the knowledge that she had indeed thought about them in that way before.

"Wooyoungie, lie down right here." She patted the space next to her.

Following her instructions, Wooyoung placed himself where she wanted him, displaying himself out to her. Hovering above him, Y/N kissed along his defined abs, getting dangerously close to the tip of his cock, exciting him while the member behind them envied their close proximity. Y/N pulled her face away right before her lips could touch his head.

"As much as I'd love to suck your pretty little cock, I think there's something you'll enjoy even more babyboy."

The pet name followed by the image of her breasts enveloping his shaft between them was enough to drive Wooyoung wild as he realized what she had in mind.

"Oh fuck Noona- yes please." He was anxious about having her warm tits hug around his length and fuck him until they were coated in his cum.

"I knew you'd love the idea."

Glancing back at the neglected male, Y/N motioned for him to come over.

"And I have an idea for you too my precious Sannie. Since you seem to like my ass so much, how about you stuff that cock of yours in my cheeks and fuck yourself on them?"

San's eyes bulged out, his dick twitching when he heard those words. It was such an erotic, kinky and naughty idea and he was all up for it.

"Shit- fuck yeah." He wasted no time as he straddled Y/N's behind, slapping his cock on each of her asscheeks before prying them apart and laying his shaft in between them.

"Fuck yourself as you want Sannie and try to keep up with Wooyoung and I." She challenged him, which he was more than willing to take up.

Spitting down on Wooyoung's cock and her tits to properly lubricate them, she sandwiched his shaft in her pillowy and soft flesh before rubbing her tits up and down on him. Wooyoung was releasing gasp after gasp the more he felt and saw his member disappear and reappear from his Noona's glorious valley. Meanwhile behind her, San busied himself as he started rutting his cock against the firm but tender skin of her ass, groaning and grunting as he took advantage of the green light she gave him to go as hard as he wanted. Each time he slammed his hips up into her, he basked in the visual of her plump ass cheeks rippling with each of his thrusts.

"Oh God." San exclaimed, one hand coming down to strike one of Y/N's cheeks, causing her to jolt forward in surprise, her stiff nipples rubbing against Wooyoung's shaft.

"Shit! San- be gentle with Noona." He whined, his eyes still focused on the silky sensation of Y/N's boobs hugging him.

"It's ok Wooyoung. I know Noona liked it. She likes it rough. Watch."

Raising his hand once more, it came back down to spank the same spot he had previously hit, a light pink hue starting to appear on her skin. Y/N tried and failed to contain a whimpered moan from her lips, spit dripping out and falling on Wooyoung's tip.

"Shit Noona, are you really into freaky shit?" He asked in astonishment.

"She's literally letting two younger guys fuck her tits and ass, how much more reassurance do you need?" San pointed out as he squeezed at her ass, riding her backside with more intensity.

"She's just a dirty kinky whore, allowing us to use her body this way. And then she's gonna let us cover her in our cum cause she's that slutty."

Y/N groaned at his words, her tongue poking out to lick at Wooyoung's slit each time it peeked out through the valley of her enormous tits.

"Fuck to paint Noona's tits with my cum-" Wooyoung hissed, teeth tugging at his bottom lip.

"You wanna do that for me? Cum on my big boobs baby boy?" She chuckled when she felt Wooyoung's cock twitch against her skin.

He couldn't answer her as another one of San's slaps along with his frenzied grinding thrusted her forward, making her and the boy below her exclaim in surprise.

"You're not cumming without me. You better hold it." San warned through gritted teeth, nails digging into her flesh as he violently rammed his cock between her fleshy and plump folds.

Y/N looked down at poor Wooyoung's face, looking so distraught as he fought hard not to cum right then and there. Leaning down, Y/N gave his tip a few kitten licks before resuming to squish her breasts on his length.

"It's ok Wooyoungie. San forgets his not in charge here. I am. So cum for me baby boy. Cum all over your Noona's tits." She softly said to him.

With shuddering whines and whimpers, Wooyoung threw his head back, eyebrows furrowed as thick streams of cum erupt from his tip, his orgasmic bliss so overwhelming, lasting longer due to Y/N continuing to rapidly push up and down his cock, milking him out of the last drop of cum he had left in his body.

"That's it. That's my good little boy, keep cumming just like that." She praised him, watching with excitement as his seed plastered itself on the top of her cleavage, some of it even splashing onto her cheeks and chin.

"That's so fucking hot- Oh my God-"

After watching the scene play out in front of him, San felt a familiar tightness in his balls, his tip starting to swell up. Before he could even register it, he was already pumping his own cum all over Y/N's ass and lower back, sputtering out incoherent words as he did so. He ended up collapsing on the couch, energy completed drained after all that, same as his friend who was still laying still on the other side. Meanwhile Y/N grabbed the box of tissues that was on the coffee table and pulled a few of them out so she could clean herself and the boys up. Starting with Wooyoung, she wiped in between his thighs, picking up the remainder of whatever was left of his cum before turning to San and cleaning up his body as well. Once both of the boys were cleaned up, she grabbed a couple more tissues to use on herself. She was distracted when she heard both of them start giggling out of nowhere.

"What's so funny?" She asked them, looking at San and then at Wooyoung, both of them donning a suspicious smile.

"So Noona does like younger men..."

[nakachuchu]

Green Tea Ice Cream | Gojo Satoru

SYNOPSIS: He confesses his love to you and you're nervous.

READER: gender neutral

WORDS: 1027

WRITTEN: 02/26/2021

NOTES: Thank you for requesting! I had a lot of fun writing this one <3

"Y/N, I'm absolutely in love with you, and I kind of hate that because I've never been in love but I love you."

He had a bright smile on his face as he looked down at you. His round glasses slipped to the tip of his nose as he looked at you expectantly.

You blinked at him multiple times, looking up at the tall man to the point where your neck was hurting.

Your eyes managed to tear away from his porcelain face, looking at the horde of various designed balloons in his hand before looking at his other hand that held a long, velvet jewelry box.

There were heart-shaped balloons, 'I love you' balloons, and an odd 'Get well soon' balloon, and you were sure he bought that one just for fun.

You were starting to feel lightheaded from how nervous you were. Your heart was beating extremely fast and the people watching you didn't make it any better.

Some people were stopping to see what your response would be, forming a crowd around you.

Satoru couldn't have picked a worse place. Well, you knew he actually could, but the middle of a busy street in the middle of the night near dinner time was horrible enough.

The two of you had just finished dinner and dessert. He took you to a quiet restaurant that wasn't fancy. It had a warm, homey feeling to it because he knew you didn't like fancy restaurants.

The two of you had green tea ice cream after dinner, which was one of your favorite flavors. He found it odd when he first learned that you didn't like green tea, but you liked green tea ice cream.

You were well aware of his ability, but it still shocked you whenever he disappeared and came back just as quickly—especially when he came back with balloons and a jewelry box after exiting the restaurant.

"Um... Can we—Can we talk? In private, please," you requested.

The smile on his face dropped slightly and the corner of his lips twitched, but he nodded.

Another embarrassing thing was that he followed after you like a sad puppy and the large balloons trailed after him.

You tried to find a quiet corner where people wouldn't come near, and when you finally found one, you stood there and fidgeted with the hem of your jacket.

Satoru resisted the urge to sigh. This was it. It was the end of his relationship with you. He wasn't even surprised.

Actually, yes, he was surprised because he was a catch. He knew that. He knew he was attractive, strong, intelligent, but he was not easy to reign in.

He spent most of his adulthood picking up women just by looking at them. They would have sex, then he'd never have to hear from them again because he didn't care enough.

Then, he met you, and you didn't want him at all. That was what made it so interesting. Of course, he pinned after you but he didn't know he was pinning at all.

He just thought he was being a fun dick, and it took him months to realize that he liked you and your company and the stupid way you can't even talk to strangers.

More months passed before he realized he didn't just like you. He fucking loved you. But he told himself he wasn't going to tell you because a relationship wasn't worth it with his profession.

He didn't want to pass on his curse to his child—if he had one with you. He did think about raising a child together with you, but then he realized that would involve confessing to you first.

So he waited to see if you would confess first, but you never did. He was close to tugging at his hair and screaming, but Gojo Satoru wasn't a screamer nor did he want to damage his luscious hair.

So he stood there with a stoic expression on his face, gripping the strings on the balloons and planning to return the necklace to the jewelry shop.

He was a bit dejected since he took so long to pick out a necklace for you. He decided on a green amethyst because the color reminded him of the green tea ice cream you liked so much.

"I like you too," you whispered.

He blinked. "Say that again?"

You looked at him hesitantly. "I like you too."

He blinked a few times before grinning. "I didn't say I liked you, but I'll take it—unless you have something to correct?" he questioned as he leaned in.

You made a face at him. "I love you too," you murmured.

He enveloped you in a hug. "Why didn't you just say so? I knew you loved me."

You slowly wrapped your arms around his waist, burying your face into his chest. "I'm shy. I didn't like all those people looking at us."

He probably should have thought about his extravagant plan more. The more he thought about it, the more he realized how dumb he was.

You were too scared to even order food at a fast food place, so there was no wonder you were terrified when he declared his love for you in front of a crowd of people.

He leaned back and began playing with your hair.

"What are you doing?" you asked.

"Just wait."

You stood there and waited until he backed away and took multiple pictures of you with the flash on.

You squinted your eyes and touched your hair, feeling some sort of braid.

"Wha—Did you braid the balloons into my hair?" you asked.

"You're so cute, Y/N! I could just eat you."

"It'll draw attention to me! Satoru, take them out," you whined.

He put his phone away and smiled as he walked back to you and slung an arm around you.

"With me by your side, all the attention will be on me," he said.

"You're so..."

"Humble? I know."

You sighed, even though you had expected that type of response. You weren't exactly sure what dating Satoru would be like, but you did like how warm his body was.

[madmeridian]

Day 6: Ice Cream/Treats

(for @meroniaevent) this one was difficult for me to get out too but i want to write more of it now so i hope you guys like it :D 

———

“Let’s go out.”

Mello glances at Matt out of the corner of his eyes, suspicious. Matt hates going out and always complains when he has to. Mello has to drag him out most of the time. Him suggesting they go out always means trouble (the last time saw them both over the toilet vomiting- and saw them agreeing the next morning that perhaps they’d gone a little too far with the drinks).

“You never want to go out.”

“I do right now. I want some ice cream, man. The place on Fifth has that double chocolate stuff you like.” Matt grinned. One thing he’d never perfected at Wammy’s was lying and Mello could see straight through his enticing words.

"You're full of shit. I'll go if you pay."

Matt brightens, bounding towards the door and grabbing his keys. Mello figures that whatever Matt is planning, it should be worth it if he gets free ice cream.

Mello listens to Matt chatter the whole way there. It's nervous rambling and they both know Matt isn't fooling anyone with it. Matt is usually laid-back, going with the flow, so Mello's curious to know what's going on.

The ice cream place is small but familiar. They're open late, thankfully, so Mello has been there many times on long nights of working.

Mello stops in the doorway, immediately understanding why Matt was so nervous. Sitting in one of the old, worn booths is Near, who gives Matt a small wave.

"I'm leaving," Mello states, stepping back out the door. Matt clutches onto his shoulder, looking at him like a kicked puppy.

"Give it a chance, Mel. Please."

"Absolutely not," Mello hisses.

"I'll do all the chores for the next two months."

Mello pauses, considers. "As long as you do it to my standards."

"Deal."

Mello sighs, walking up to the counter where the employee is nervously waiting, having seen their argument and knowing Mello's temperament from previous visits.

Matt orders his ice cream and heads over to the table, grinning at Near. Near’s gaze flicks over to Mello. He subtly scowls, sitting next to Matt.

"I'm glad you could make it. It's not often we're in the same place so I thought it would be nice to catch up," Matt says amiably.

"It's been a while," Near agrees. He glances Mello’s way again only to be met with a stony glare. Mello doesn’t want to be taken back to Wammy’s when Matt would have to play peacemaker for them. And he knows damn well he won’t be able to get more than a few words out before finding a way to insult Near.

Matt, probably aware of that, goes on and on about meaningless things, asking Near questions about his cases and a million other things. As Mello expected, Near hasn’t done anything but live and breathe his cases. Though Mello had noticed a decrease in the cases L took (he keeps an eye on L’s business so he knows if his rival might interfere in his own business and only for that reason, thank you very much).

“I’m gonna run to the bathroom,” Matt says, giving them both a tense smile. “Be right back.” They both silently watch him go. It is awkwardly silent for a moment, neither of them looking or speaking at the other.

Finally, Near meets his eyes for a brief second and Mello sneers in response, taking his chance.

“Enjoying being L?” Mello asks venomously. “Matt says you’ve been around quite a bit. Getting pickier on your cases.” The ice cream in front of Near is half-melted, but he doesn’t seem to care. Near favors a blank stare at Mello for a moment, rather than his dessert.

Mello expects the usual, an equally scathing retort. Instead, he gets a small sigh in response, Near tucking both legs to his chest, under his chin. It’s almost defeated and Mello feels the smallest twinge of guilt.

“Nothing is worth it,” Near says finally, playing with his spoon idly. “The Kira case was easy to find motivation for. We had to avenge L, of course. It’s what we were raised for. But now that it’s all up to me… it’s difficult for me.”

“And that’s exactly why he shouldn’t have chosen you,” Mello spits.

“He didn’t.”

Mello blinks, unused to hearing any sort of emotion in Near’s voice. It’s barely there, but he knows his rival well enough to recognize the note of exhaustion in his voice.

“No, I guess not.”

“Sometimes I wished you’d come and take the title from me. Wammy’s trained us intellectually for this, but not for the other parts of it. I hate it.” Mello isn’t surprised. Near has never sugarcoated his words and the best word that Mello can describe how Near looks right now is miserable.

“I think that L would rather have you in his shoes. I’d have tarnished his name by this point,” Mello says. He’s not sure why he’s trying to lighten Near’s mood up or why he cares. It feels wrong to see Near so defeated, especially when he’s holding the title they both worked for.

“At least you’d have gotten something done.” Near sets his spoon down in his melted ice cream.

Mello opens his mouth to try something else light-hearted, but his phone buzzes.

Matt: pls don’t be mad at me

Mello: what did you do?

Matt: he’s rly sad and shit so i thought seeing u would help

Mello: where are you?

Matt: if u need me to pick u up later i can

Mello: you did not leave me here with him

Mello: you fucking asshole respond to me

Mello: fucking coward

Mello: i’m breaking your consoles when i get home

“Matt left.” Mello types another message with an array of colorful language, but there’s still no response. “Asshole.”

“Rester drove me here. He can drop you off before I go home too.” Mello’s not sure if he’s imagining the slightly crestfallen look on Near’s face and what’s wrong with me why am I actually feeling bad for him what the fuck what the fuck?

Yet, Mello finds himself saying “Actually I don’t really want to go home and deal with him yet. We could just go back to your headquarters.”

A part of him is pleased by the clear surprise on Near’s face. The other part is screaming at him for offering to hang out with his fucking rival out of pity.

“You usually find my presence boring or irritating. Are you feeling alright?”

“I would rather deal with you than Matt right now.”

Near hesitates as if he were about to protest again. Then stands, looking back at Mello as if asking are you serious about this?

Mello follows him out the door, wondering what the hell Matt got him into.

[thebickedwitchoftherest]

Oh My God, They Were Roommates || Camille & Cece

Timing: Sometime before Jane moved in (please don’t roast me)

Location: Cece’s house

Parties: Cece & @carrionxcamille

Summary: When Camille moved in with Cece they share dinner and get to know each other.

Camille was going to owe Cece for the rest of her life, and she didn’t even care about the debt.

Once she’d chucked her pitiful backpack of belongings- yes, she still had that little stuff to her name- into the bedroom that was to be hers, Camille bolted straight to the bathroom, throwing an apology over her shoulder for how long she was about to steal the shower for. Hey, the water pressure in that motel had done absolutely nothing for her hair. When she did eventually leave the bathroom in a flourish of steam with a towel wrapped around her head she felt more at peace than she had in months. Seriously, the wonders of a good hot shower never ceased to amaze.

It was a little while after that she left her room again, in the silky new pajama set she’d treated herself too with her hair soft and shiny and actually dry, since the hairdryer here didn’t threaten to overheat if you had it on for more than five minutes.

The fun didn’t stop there though, because now Camille had a whole actual kitchen to play with. “Cece, I’m gonna make dinner!” She called out, already rummaging through the fridge for ideas- she’d have to start writing the lists for their grocery shopping, this place was lacking- “stop me if you don’t like spaghetti carbonara!” She was already starting anyway, feeling lighter and more at ease than she had in weeks. To be in a real home again really lifted her spirits. 

In almost no time at all she had food set on the table- she was only sorry they didn’t have anything she could make dessert with, but ice cream would do- and was pouring a glass of white wine for each of the girls. “I’m sorry I immediately took over your shower and kitchen.” Camille said, now that some of her excitement had given way and reminded her of her manners, “I hope you like dinner, anyway. I just wanted to say thank you to you, for having me. It means a lot that you’d help me like you have.” 

Cece had been laughing to herself the entire day. As sad as it was, Camille didn’t have much to move with her when Cece set off on helping her move out of that shithole motel she had been trapped in. Nothing but a few small bags that needed transferred to the first of Cece’s guest bedrooms. It had been the same one that Morgan had used after a similar situation had her moving in. Personally, Cece loved the feeling. As horribly as her own circumstances had ended up with the coven, they had still taken her in after getting kicked out of her own home. When she had nowhere else to go, they had taken her in. Obviously, Cece wasn’t about to pull some bullshit like that, but she could pay it back minus the whole culty murder part.

As Camille made herself home and found her way to the fridge, Cece gravitated over towards it and joined her, grabbing a chair at the barstool that looked into the kitchen. “Ooh, Carbonara? Now that’s fancy.” Cece would take whatever Cam was planning on cooking. Cece wasn’t a picky eater by means, and she also wasn’t much of a cook. Cece had learned a few recipes from Morgan but rarely cooked them for herself. 

“Hey, feel free to cook in my kitchen any time. Especially if you’re making enough for two.” Cece held up her wine glass that Camille had poured as if in cheers, “But don’t worry. I have a full bathroom in my room. That one is all yours.” Cece didn’t waste any time digging into the food, nodding her head and giving a thumbs up after the first mouthful, “Oh this shit is bomb” Cece finally spoke after she finished chewing, digging right back in for another bite. “You don’t have to thank me. You needed a place that wasn’t a den for up and coming serial killers. I have two guest rooms. It all worked out. I’d love to know what convinced you to come here of all places.”

She was safe here, that was the other thing. It was so much easier to breathe when you couldn’t hear your vampire neighbors through the walls discussing some party, when you weren’t watching another sad looking lost soul slip through the door of the drug dealer who lived on the other side. This felt like the kind of place she could start her life again. Save up, get an ID and her own place. It would be nice to have company, too. Camille had spent so much time staring blankly at terrible wallpaper with no one to talk too. “You’re in luck, I don’t really know how to cook for just one person.” She laughed, taking a seat at the table and raising her own glass in return to Cece’s gesture. 

It was a simple meal, by her standards anyway, but even Camille was blown away by how good it tasted after weeks of microwave meals and cold sandwiches. “I’m glad you like it- you’ll have to let me know if there’s anything you absolutely won’t or can’t eat, I’ll do some grocery shopping later this week.” She was looking forward to that, too. Proper food shopping. She wondered if Cece had a vegetable crisper. Camille doesn’t answer the question at first, about what convinced her to move to White Crest. She’s not the first person to ask, and she has a party line about her parents living nearby which she knew she should use right now, but…

Camille was remembering the bar, that joke that had been made about Cece hexing someone. Was she really a witch? There wasn’t anything in the house that screamed witchcraft to Cam, but then again she had no idea what sort of stuff that would really be. She ate and drank quietly for a while, considering what to say. If Cam asked outright and Cece turned out to not be a witch, to not know about or believe in any of that kind of stuff, it would be throwing a serious wrench in their dynamic just as they were getting to know eachother. No one wanted a crazy roommate, and spouting off about witches was exactly that. “My parents live nearby.” She spoke up after a while, giving Cece a bright smile and a shrug, “I’d heard about this place growing up and I figured… Well, if there was a time to live in the weird town it was now, right? If nothing else there’s always something wacky going on if I need a distraction.” Which she did, often. “What about you? Why are you in White Crest?”

Cece leaned back in her chair dramatically and patted her belly, “Don’t you worry roomie. This girl eats and and everything. I’m not picky.” Unlike her adopted parents, who both had a myriad of food allergies and dietary restrictions, her genetic parents (fuck them wherever they may be) had graced her with the appetite and taste buds to enjoy just about anything. And no allergies that she knew of to worry about. “I’m not gonna leave you completely hanging though, don’t worry. I can’t cook for shit, but I’ll make an excellent sous-chef.” She feigned cutting vegetables with her fork and then took a huge bite of pasta, “You and me are about to put MasterChef to shame.” 

Cece didn’t believe the answer, not entirely. Maybe it was because of the town itself. It just didn’t seem like people picked up and moved here on a whim. They came here on purpose, or they ended up here by some supernatural unlucky twist of fate. Maybe Camille really did just want a change. If she was looking for a little excitement in her life, then maybe she did turn to the town with a weird reputation. Back in high school, when Cece was full swing into her horror movie phase she probably would have done the same exact thing. She supposed it didn’t matter at the moment, Cam had only just moved in. The two weren’t obligated to explain the truth about them being here to each other. Cece had gotten more comfortable around town, helping out when needed, but that didn’t mean she was yelling it down the streets. “Long story. My family travelled a lot. They’re like the weird living off the Earth hippy types. We travelled all over the country before I finally decided to split off and make my own path. I just so happened to be up here in the New England area, so I looked for some job postings and bought a house.” Cece shrugged. Maybe it was an oversimplified version of the truth, but that story wasn’t one that she planned on telling to anyone. “Not nearly as glamorous as it sounds, honestly. Most of the time, I miss Cali. But this place has its own charms. Can’t complain about the company. Yourself included of course. Being roommates gives you automatic rights to the bestie list. Welcome to the club.”

Camille nods, pretty happy it seems like she’ll be able to have her run of recipes in this house- she’s already running through a list of her favorite things she wants to make first. Salmon, risotto, chickpea curry, stuffed vine leaves, sunday lunch! She’d done pretty much all the meal cooking at home- jobless Jace had made do with sandwiches or leftovers most of the time for lunch while she was at work- so it would be nice to get back into the swing of it, and actually have a little help. She’d read somewhere that cooking together could be a good bonding experience. Cam chuckled, “well that’s good. I’m sure you’ll be able to learn a little if we’re cooking together, too.” And she’d pick up a couple of her old favorite recipe books to leave behind once she moved out, too.

It was also nice to have her food appreciated for once, she’d been lucky to get so much as a thankyou out of Jace. Cam ate a little more as Cece explained how she’d found herself in town, quietly a little jealous that she’d travelled and seen so much more of the country than Cam ever had. From Bangor to Boston and pretty much back again. “Sounds like it must have made for a fun childhood.” She beams when Cece refers to her as a bestie- it’s been an awful long time since Camille has had proper friends. “Happy to be a member.” She says, “I think I’ve hit a patch of good luck, considering how coincidental it was that I met you that night at the bar.” She traces a finger around the rim of her wine glass, smiling wistfully, “hopefully it means things are turning around for me.”

Cece let herself laugh, whether it came across as genuine or sarcastic one was anybody’s guess. Must have made for a fun childhood. Explaining Cece’s past, even a felony free PG version of the tale, seemed complicated. Her life had been made up of different families. Her blood family that had never wanted her. Her adopted family that turned their backs on her. Her coven family, that took advantage of her. And her life here, with some semblance of a found family being built. Far too complex to try to get into during their first dinner together. So as far as Cam knew, maybe her life travelling around the country had been a fun childhood, even if she had never actually left California until she had turned 18. “Everyday was different, I’ll tell you that. Plus it led me here, where I spent the first few months freezing my ass day in and day out.” Cece pointed towards the closet near the front door, “Seriously, you should see all the winter coats I have in there. I used to wear those around the house.” 

That night had been a happy coincidence, hadn’t it? If Cece and Winn had gone to any other bar they probably wouldn’t have met each other at all. Just one of a sea of faces the two would look by as they passed each other on the street everyone once and awhile. “Fate does work in mysterious ways, I guess.” Cece wasn’t big into the idea of fate. From what she had seen, if you didn’t take control of it yourself fate had a tendency to fuck you over. “Ah right, you are here after a shitty divorce, right?” Cece vaguely remembered the conversation from that night, though admittedly Winn’s stream of drinks that he was footing the bill for had kept her pretty tipsy the entire night. “From what I remember, he sounds like a real fuckboy. So good for you, girl. You deserve a lot better.”

Adults are harder to read than kids. Even if what a kid says is confusing their tone always gives them away, because they haven’t quite figured out how to change that yet. Cece laughs, and there’s an edge to it but Camille doesn’t know what that means- did she resent her parents for dragging her around the country when she’d have rather stayed in one place? Was it not fun for her? It’s really not her place to pry, of course. Big changes to your life were not always a good thing though, she understood that. “I suppose it must be cold, compared to Cali.” Cam grins ruefully, “I’m used to it. Boston isn’t quite as cold, but near enough.” And maybe she’d borrow one or two of those coats, just to mix up wearing the same outfits over and over again.

It was no small favor, putting a roof over her head and getting her out of that motel. Camille couldn’t remember the last time someone had done something so nice for her- of course, bar telling her colleague what a terrible person Jace had actually turned out to be she couldn’t really remember telling anyone about her problems either, so maybe that was why. “Adam was a fuckboy.” Camille corrects, shaking her head and smiling a little at the memory of him- she was still shocked someone his age would even want to flirt with her, as put on as it was- “Jace was a nasty prick.” She has a sip of wine, like even saying his name makes her mouth feel bad. “So the divorce was great, it’s the marriage that was awful.” That’s half true, the divorce could have also been better, but murder isn’t exactly dinner conversation. “I mean I was dating that guy since high school, we were perfect. Seriously- that best couple superlative thing at prom? We won it.” When life was all fun and games, Jace had been the ideal partner. Charming, likeable, energetic. It was when he realized he couldn’t be the star of the football team his entire life that shit went downhill. “I don’t know what happened. Spent over a decade trying to make him happy, woke up one morning and realized I hated him.” 

Camille wrinkles her nose, twirling more pasta around her fork and taking a bite before she talks again. “Sorry, don’t let me go on about it. It’s over, I’m good. New start.” She scrambles for a lighter topic, “so I know you work with Regan, but what is it that you actually do? Are you her assistant, or something?”

“It’s so fucking cold here, Cam. So. Fucking. Cold.” Even the summers had nothing on LA. Cece had been that annoying teen that spent all day on the bitch and only applied sunscreen once. Her skin wasn’t used to this lack of sunshine. It rebelled against her.

“Fair. At least Adam has a good attitude. I think he’s a himbo.” Cece nodded at herself, liking and accepting the comparison. Adam seemed like the type that respected women while wanting to bone them. Cece could respect that. This Jace dude on the other hand? Seemed like a dumpster fire personified. “Glad you had that epiphany. That freedom must feel so good after all these years. The offer still stands about fucking up his life. I love me a good revenge arch.” 

Camille didn’t seem to love talking about it, and though Cece did figure she’d get the full story eventually, maybe that was a conversation for another day. Maybe after they had been roommates for a longer period of time than a few days. “Me? Regan’s assistant?” Cece rocked her head back and gave a single, loud laugh. “I couldn’t be her assistant. I’d get fired so quickly.” Cece worked for Regan, but her saving grace was that Cece did her own thing at work. “I’m a toxicologist for the medical examiner’s office. It sounds fancy, but I spend most of my day running tests on urine and blood and every other bodily fluid you can imagine. Glamorous stuff, I know.”

Camille chuckled, shaking her head. “I wouldn’t know. I haven’t travelled much. Jace and I went to Flora for spring break in classic fashion, Clearwater.” Despite herself she grins a little at the memory- it had been a good time. “I imagine this place might make you feel like an icicle after spending your whole life somewhere with that kind of heat.”

She had never been much of a gossiper, at least not about herself. It was a habit cultivated since high school- top of your class with the star of the football team on your arm? Your life is perfect and you’re the envy of every other kid there. End of story. Don’t tell your friends about the big fight you and Jace had, or how you had to stay up studying until you passed out at your desk to get that high score on the history test. The whole damn reason she worked so hard was so that people never knew that stuff. It was a lot harder to present a perfect facade these days, as a divorced woman with a shitty job, but Cam would do what she could.

Her eyebrows drew together in confusion. “A… Himbo? I don’t know what that is.” God, she was so old. She’d never had to say that before. But seriously, himbo? That wasn’t a word. Camille taught english lit! She knew all the words! Camille smirked at the offer, but shook her head. “There’s no one to pay his bills or get him beer out the fridge now, I think that’s probably gonna fuck him up enough.” That, and the fact that he was in jail for killing her. Rotten bastard. Couldn’t exactly tell Cece that, though.

Camille would admit to knowing next to nothing about science, but as an elementary school teacher she had seen the ways they tried to push young girls into softer interests, so she admired women like Regan and Cece who had pursued their passion regardless. “You have to follow what interests you.” She shrugged, “I could easily argue there’s nothing glamorous about teaching kids English lit but I loved it all the same.” It had been a good compromise; her desire to be an author and her love for children. 

“There’s a certain charm in staying still, I think.” Cece admitted. Before she had been forced to leave, Cece had never had much interest in leaving LA. She liked California, liked the atmosphere and the people. Her first time leaving had been more out of necessity and the opportunity to have people help her. That had obviously gone to shit. “But I come from a place of privilege in that. I’ve been able to travel around to get to say that planting roots is better. You might think the opposite.” For what it was worth, besides the fact that her ex husband was a complete fuckwad, she didn’t seem disappointed by the memory.

“Ooh, I get to give you an english lesson? How the turns have tabled.” Cece perked up. It was cute, Cam not knowing what a himbo was. “A himbo is an evolved fuck boy. They’re still stupid, cute jocks. Muscles like a god, but a single brain cell bouncing around that empty skull.” Cece waved her finger around her head as an example, “But they’re actually good people. Himbos don’t fuck with misogyny or homophobia or racism. They mix respect women juice in with their protein shakes.” Cece interrupted her speech by stuffing pasta into her mouth. “Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.”

“Agreed. I can tell you’d be good with kids.” Camille kept a calmness about her, but had a quirkier side that Cece would have to work at pulling out. All in due time. “If you still love teaching so much, have you considered looking at the schools here? Seeing if there are any openings?”

Camille grinned and nodded- she’d had friends who’d taken off after highschool, figured out their way around the globe. Some of them came back changed with all these grand ideas and new goals for their life, others just rolled back into town with no money and no idea what to do next. She’d always figured it didn’t matter where you went, problems followed you anyway. “I always wanted to get settled somewhere myself, have a home and a family…” She trailed off sadly, unable to stop herself from remembering how hopeful she’d once been about it all. Buying that house and decorating with Jace, making plans to turn the spare room into a nursery one day. She shook herself out of the melancholy, taking a long sip from her wine glass. “I nearly went to New York for college, but decided on Boston instead.” Well, settled for. Because Jace got accepted there.

Really their elementary education programs were both wonderful, so it was fine.

She listened attentively as Cece explained the term, lips pulling up into an amused grin. “Oh, it’s a portmanteau!” Cam realized after a moment, “him and bimbo.” She nods, “I get it now. Strong and kind, but not the sharpest stick in the bunch. That’s a good one, I like it.” Had to be a term that the younger generation had coined, she wondered if Cece even realized how common of an english lit practice she’d adopted for her terminology. Cam smiles, “I’ve always liked kids.” Her good mood drops again, quickly, though. Working at a local school… Her identity, all her qualifications and achievements. They belonged to a dead woman, she couldn’t use them now. “It’s something I’ll look into, I think. When things are more settled for me.” She lied, “for the moment I just want to get used to a new town, focus on myself for a bit and what I really want for my future.” After pushing pasta around her plate for a minute Cam looks up, smiling. “What about your future? Is there a step up from a toxicologist, are you thinking about more qualifications? A PhD or something?”

Cece leaned back in her chair and tried to picture that for Camille. Cece herself had never much considered that sort of life for herself. Even back as a teenager, when her life was as normal as a girl growing up in LA could be, the idea of the white picket fence life had always been a bit too cookie cutter for Cece’s lifestyle. Now, Cece wasn’t sure she was cut out for it even if it was something she did want. Too much baggage, maybe. Or too little patience to deal with bullshit. Clearly, Camille had dealt with her fair share if she was no longer living the married life. “You’re still pretty damn young. No reason you shouldn’t be able to still have that. And this time we’ll make sure they’re not a giant bag of dicks disguised as a high school sweetheart.”

“A portman-who?” Cece questioned, eyebrow raising and a smirk crossing her lips. Cece wasn’t much for this shit, but loved Camille’s excitement about it. What an english teacher thing to do. “Yeah for sure. Let me know if I can help with anything. I have no connections to the school, but the two of us together? I bet we could charm the hell out of anyone we need.” Camille seemed to be over the conversation and promptly flipped it around back to Cece, questioning the career that Cece hadn’t given much thought to by herself. “Hmm… not where I am currently, not really. Working for a private company would probably get me more money. Or I could try to get in with the university. Write papers and teach some classes if I really wanted. I’m happy where I am though.” The idea of getting a doctorate was honestly hilarious to Cece and she couldn’t help the laugh building up before eventually bursting free, “God, no. Can you imagine? I couldn’t imagine expecting people to call me Doctor Bishop. I’m not pretentious enough.” 

Camille had spent years working towards the next milestone. Graduate highschool, then college, then start the perfect life. Had it all fallen apart so spectacularly to send her a sign? Was she pushing so hard to get something she couldn’t have? There were people everywhere with happy families, and she’d put so much damn effort into having hers. Was the world mocking her? Rip it all away and send her back to square one, just to see if she does the same stupid stuff all over again.

Well, maybe she wouldn’t. Maybe she’d say sod the man and sod the family and just do whatever made her happy! If she could figure out what that was. Was it marriage and kids? Not right now. Honestly the idea of being alone in a house with a man was the last thing she wanted right now. But one day, probably. She giggled a little at Cece’s choice phrasing, “well, if I meet someone I think is charming I’ll make sure to have them screened by you just to be sure.”

“A portmanteau.” She repeated, “a blend of two words. Y’know, brunch, podcast, smog, himbo.” Cam’s glad she doesn’t mind the shift in conversation- she would like to know more about the schools here, and how she might go about getting work in them, but there was no point giving that sort of stuff any of her time until she had the essentials figured out. Would Cece know anyone who could get her an ID? Regan was staunchly against helping Camille with anything illegal, but hopefully her new friend wasn’t quite so rigid as that, and willing to keep a secret. “It’s not about pretention, it’s about qualification.” Camille argued, “a doctorate would open up a lot of opportunities, if you were interested. I don’t think it’s pretentious to value your education.” Cece was so young, and already trying to strike off paths for her future without really considering them. “If teaching ever did interest you I could offer some pointers. Though I’ve never taught a university class, my advice might be a little too juvenile.” 

“I’ll happily screen any of your potential love interests. I have a rigorous testing regiment to ensure only the most worthy pass through. The others are sent away, broken of hearts and blue of balls.” Cece stated it wistfully as if she were writing it in some victorian style letter. She rested her face into the palms of her hands and stared in wonder at Camille as she defined and even provided examples of a portmanteau. “I love it when you talk literary devices to me. Very hot for teacher vibes.” 

Camille seemed passionate about Cece keeping her options open for this higher education thing. Honestly, Cece had never considered a doctorate as a viable career path for her. Completing her degree while constantly travelling had been enough of a handful. Trying to deal with four more years of schooling just had not seemed possible. But Cece wasn’t a wanderer anymore. She had settled down in an area with a good job, better connections and a college close to her. It was certainly something to consider, even if it didn’t sound like much fun. “Okay mom. I’ll keep my options open.” Cece couldn’t see herself teaching younger students. Not for any specific reasons, just because her specific interests in toxicology tended to be more specialized than elementary, middle or even most high schools tended to offer. “Please, I guarantee your job was a hundred times harder than anything a college professor deals with. I’d take your advice over them anyday.”

Camille wasn’t even sure what dating was like these days. How did you meet people? There were all the apps, but that seemed so impersonal. Was she meant to go to a bar? The first and last person to sidle up to her at such a location was Adam and they’d already gone through why that was a bad idea- oh god, was White Crest like a college town? Was she even going to find any viable older men here? Must start paying more attention to the morning coffee crowd to find out. She chuckled and shook her head, “funnily enough I don’t think it’s the kind of come on that’s going to work in the real world. I’m gonna have to figure out some new moves.” 

In highschool her move had just been walking right up to Jace by his locker one day and asking him if he wanted to ask her to the dance, and that had been that. Probably wasn’t the way to go about things as an adult. She sighed and stabbed her fork back into the pasta, “I’m just saying, you’re too young to be closing doors like that. You don’t have to do it right now obviously, but it might be something to consider later down the line.” Though teaching specifically was something Cam believed you should only get into if you were truly passionate about it- too many teachers did it for the wrong reasons and that was how you ended up with miserable classrooms. “Ah, true. I doubt many professors have had to explain to their students why they shouldn’t eat paper. I’d be happy to advise though, with further study and all that stuff, I do love a good excuse for a pros and cons list.” Plus helping with this kind of decision just felt like another way to balance the scales between the two of them, and Camille wanted the excuse to reminisce. She pushed her empty bowl to the side a little, “you’ll figure out what you want, anyway. You’ve got time.” 

Time- how much did Camille have? What would Cece do if she found out the truth? What if someone from Boston found out, or her parents decided to visit White Crest for a weekend? “I think I’m gonna have another glass of wine.” She decided, pushing out of her chair to retrieve the bottle from the fridge, “do you want one?”

“I’ll be your wingwoman any night. Once you want to get back out there.” Cece wiggled her eyebrows, always encouraging a one night stand or two to blow off some steam. It hadn’t been Cece’s style lately, a bit of her party years getting more than enough attention while she was with the coven. But Camille had been with the same man for years, and he sounded like a bit of a prick. She could probably benefit from a few wild nights to get her mind off of things. And Cece would be a bad friend if she didn’t tag along to make sure everything went smoothly.

When Camille broke the conversation for wine, Cece was more than happy to oblige. There had been way too much talk about the future tonight. Cece was trying to live day to day here in town. Thinking about what the future could hold was way too depressing. “Please, if there’s one thing you should learn about me it’s that you never have to ask if I want more wine.” Cece laughed, downing the rest of her glass and sliding it over towards Camille for a refill. “If you remember that then you and I are going to be the best of friends.”

[misha-moose-dean-burger-lover]

Strawberry Icecream.

Dean misses Cas.

Well, sue him for having feelings about his very awesome boyfriend, who is currently living out his highschool dream in Washington, interning at the frigging White House. 'They're very lucky to have you', Dean had said, sincerely, to a very white-faced Castiel, in a student blazer. 'I just hope they let you come back home, when you're done'. And the latter had smiled, in spite of himself, and planted a chaste kiss on Dean's lips.

That was the last time he'd been kissed in the past six weeks. Not the longest span of all time, but it sure feels like an eternity.

It's not just the feeling of lips on his; that shared softness, the sweet ecstasy of such intimacy. The shuffling closer and the teasing apart, the hums of pleasure and all the infinite sparks everywhere. It's not just Cas's kisses he misses. It's Cas.

It's all of him. It's the morning snark, and the having someone to surprise with coffee in bed. It's the checking-in at lunch - they obviously still do that, but those bastards give him only enough of a break to text, and the going shopping for groceries, almost daily, (Cas would have said, it's because they're both really bad at shopping, and also have a tendency to speed-eat through everything, if they've got the stuff at home.) It's the dinners - it's not nearly the same thing, when you're the only one snickering at the sitcoms, through a mouthful of pizza. And it's the going to sleep, together, and wrapped around in all the most perfect ways.

Fuck, Dean misses Cas so much, it hurts.

He hates that he wasn't able to join him in the capital - since bunking twelve weeks off a year, is the kind of dumb thing Dean would've done for someone like Cas, but wasn't allowed to, because that's who Cas is. The sonuvabitch had rolled his eyes in a partial reprimand, when Dean had hinted at it. 'Oh, Dean'. He'd said, in that beautiful fucking voice of his. 'I'm going to be back so soon to ruin that bachelor's life you'll get used to again; you have no idea'.

Well, to hell with that. Dean had learned to dig the committed scene now, okay? He didn't like living alone in their apartment, any more than he liked sleeping all up on Cas's side - trying to bury himself and fit in the impressions on the mattress.

It was a weird life he lived.

He didn't even have any pending deadlines, for a huge fucking change, because most months of college when Cas is around is spent regretting all of his life choices - times when Cas is right there, so warm and delicious and amazing, and Dean has a stupid essay due Monday so he can't join him in bed.

Without too many things to do, but drag himself to every class he's taking, literally everyday - he's this sort of unbelievably punctual these days, which makes no dense - he has way too much time to long.

Dean curses silently at himself at his own trail of thought - a rather sad, long monologue, indeed - and especially his choice of words. Makes him sound like a war widow for Christ's sake, and his man is just a few states over. Kicking ass, for the US government - among other, more boring stuff he has to do.

And that's usually where he stops thinking. It's where he picks himself up from the couch, and sits at his desk with a Mechanics textbook instead - or somedays, it's where he goes over to his neighbor's, to simply hang. Charlie Bradbury recently moved in across the hallway. A complete dork, of the kind to battle his stupid brother - but incredible at taking his mind off of other things. (It was impossible to be discussing Star Wars ships with her while missing Cas.)

But today, he does something different. Instead of shoving his loneliness away, and adding it to the pile of feelings he has built his throne on - read, is sitting on presently - he picks up his phone. Unlocks the screen to Baby staring back at him with blaring, truly picturesque headlights that is Dean's wallpaper - and clicks around till he has opened his chat with Cas.

The last thing they'd been talking about was how Cas's deskmate listens to a lot of Korean music, and he's kind of falling for BTS himself - Dean had asked him, perfectly serious, if he needed to show up at his workplace, to serenade him with Led Zepp as drastic times call for drastic measures, and Cas had sent a laughing-with-tears emoji and added, that he was sure Dean would enjoy them too, and that he'd definitely make Dean listen to it when he got back. The only unread message he had, was a song rec, which Dean rolled his eyes at. The only way he was going to "fall" for a modern-day boyband ever, is if Cas was right by his side, telling him to do it.

Dean's thumbs click-clacked on his phone keyboard until he'd typed it out.

I miss you.

But who was he kidding? He wasn't going to send that. Or say that. At least, that wasn't what he was going to lead with. The reluctance was half-ways Dean's internal hesitation, for unexplainable reasons, and also knowledge of the fact that such a blatant confession would tell Cas just how devastated Dean was, on this end, and he'd probably fly back the next day to check on him. The thought brought a random pricking sensation in his eyes, but he ignored it.

He erased that.

>>> hey, what are you up to?

He hadn't expected an instant response, so he immediately leaped when he got one. A smile, brighter than any that'd made it to his face today, showed up at the pleasant surprise, that Cas was around his phone and probably available to text.

<<< nothing much. got home ten minutes ago.

To read 'home' in any context, than to talk about their apartment with him in it, here at Stanford university - was all sorts of revolting, but he swallowed his first reaction.

>>> half day? did you have food??

<<< yes, to both.

Dean thought of what to say next, miserable because he was bad at this - dammit, conversations always flowed when Cas was in front of him, but he'd never been good at texting - but thankfully, Cas went on.

Dean sighed, softly. Imagining that gave him another smile.

<<< hey, guess what I'm up to?

>>> nothing much.

He pinched his brows together, as he squinted. Would Cas be able to hear him tease, from his words alone? He must, right? Unlike him, Cas was always a good texter. 'Emoticons', he'd just vaguely justify it.

<<< what I'm up to NOW, is smiling

<<< but I'm also getting something to eat. What do you think I'm having?

Dean bit his lip, thinking about it. It's probably like four, in the afternoon, because he's only been wallowing in his misery for an hour before he's texting Cas. That's like a couple hours after lunch for Cas, which means this is probably a late dessert.

That makes sense.

>>> pie?

But then, he thinks about it, and how Cas loves potatoes enough to have them for most meals these days. And he used to frown over Dean and burgers, while gorging on his new love, the world's unhealthiest vegetable, first thing since he got out of sight.

>>> does it involve potatoes?

He sends in, last minute. But perhaps Cas was already typing out his answer, because his message hasn't even been read when he receives another message.

<<< STRAWBERRY ICE-CREAM WITH CHOCOLATE SAUCE BECAUSE I AM A CRIMINAL OF MANKIND

Dean takes one look at that, and is suddenly collapsing on the couch in a fit of laughs. He melts spontaneously, and his phone falls on the carpet, as he bends over, laughing. He can't help it, the image is just too perfect.

Cas yelling those words, at the top of his lungs - that's what all-caps mean, right? - in his deep, gorgeous baritone - looking all rebellious about the last part, just like he can be some days. That ridiculously adorable scrunched-up nose, and that stubbornly jutted-out chin with a defensive glare, which is also meant to stand it's ground in a fight, and just -

It's too perfect.

He imagines Cas in front of him, and he imagines that everything is perfect again - he's right there, and he's pouring his stupid chocolate syrup over a bowl of pink ice creams plentifully, all the while being smug because he's basically breaking societal norms, and just being so fucking proud of himself with that tiny smirk and the pout he'd have, and his -

Fuck, it's hard to even think about it, without getting a goddamn attack about how much he misses Cas.

<<< Dean??

<<< This is the part where you tell me that if that's a crime, you wanna share that cell with me ;)

Dean is pretty sure that in that moment, he dies. He can almost feel the moment his spirit leaves his body, because he's frozen for a full minute - stunned by the amount of love he has in him. His heart is brimming over with emotions, and every string in there is screaming for Cas, in the name of love.

He's known he loves Cas for months now, but he's never fallen so hard for someone.

Yet it only makes sense, in fucking leaps and bounds, that it's Cas. Who breaks all those limits. Who turns Dean into mush, who breaks all his limits, who owns every square inch of Dean and his heart, and who just makes him melt.

It's not even an incredibly romantic dialogue. It's childish, and hilarious, and just so Cas, that all of Dean aches at once.

>>> you're sorta wrong

It's a wonder that Dean can even keep holding onto his phone at this point. He's basically a puddle of emotions, a mess of feelings, letting every current of love wash over him and deride his boundaries, just a little bit more. He's suddenly euphoric; it's like he's seeing his situation from an elevation now, and he doesn't care about anything else - the whiney voice in his head reminding him it's gonna be another six weeks can go screw itself, because Dean loves Cas so much, nothing else can possibly matter.

>>> this is the part where I say I love you

It will always work out. Distances will go away, and Cas will return, and Dean will get to hold him again, and he'll get to kiss him again, and call him an idiot, and then bring him coffee again.

And what else could Dean Winchester ever really need?

***

Notes: Oh, Sammeh. I wrote after a couple millenia. And there's so many people who've all been heartwarmingly nice about my *block* and I've been getting pretty much a lot of inspiration lately, though I haven't been writing it - but today was different. Today, I was m o v e d, and I told life to shove it's shit someplace else and cleared my brain and fucking wrote this weird-ass tiny piece of feelings.

I dedicate this to @screamatthescreen. She's my texting soulmate (in the sense, that we were made to text each other) and says the most amazing things and I love her and well, she inspired me so hard that I threw away redox and equivalents and began to type. And this came out. Thank you, Zina!!!

Since I'm back on my BS, here's a word out to the tribe: @ctrl-alt-destiel @emmii4 @awkward-penguin-in-a-trenchcoat @styggtroll @adventurous-blob @petrichoravellichor @all-or-nothing-baby @moderatelypanickedbiromantic @elvenlicht @legendary-destiel @noemithenephilim @galaxy-charm @trenchcoatsandfreckles @naitia @ladywaywarddsc @zoerayne2426 @thekidsmaybealright @hellfire37 @3dg310rdsupreme @impulsivedandelion @iamcharliebradburylevelperfect I have a feeling I'm forgetting people. I should've updated my list, dammit. So sorry if I am, please just drop me a line. Taglist open, Please ask if you wish to be removed/added.

[angeldolanx]

Chapter 15. /have new friends/

well this is definitely not a romantic part, but still happy valentines day angels. hope you enjoy :)

01.10.'19

"You are really suspicious to me" I said to Ethan, when I sat again in the front seat of his car a week later. Basically I spent the past seven days at home and I felt like this seven days wasn't even enough to recover from that crazy night, or at least that's what I said. I only went to work and as soon as I got home I changed into something comfy and watched tv shows and ate unhealthy foods, what I ordered- because I was lazy to go even to the store. I didn't even let Corinna to come over, I was in a low state of mind and I wanted to be alone all the time. As soon as I hinted this to Ethan in a massage, I thought he is gonna just say I shouldn't be like this, but instead of this he offered that he is gonna come with me to the shop, or to anywhere, if I leave the house finally with him. Of course in the beginning I said no, and I am fine but he was as stubborn as me, that's how I ended up in his car on my way to the supermarket with him.

"Why?" he looked at me for a second, then turned back to the road.

" I don't think you love grocery shopping that much that you offer your company when one of your friends go there" I replied, and he laughed lightly.

"I feel like I know you enough to see that you are not yourself recently" he said in more like a serious voice.

" And is the supermarket some kind of therapy?"

"No, but at least you are out of the house, put yourself together and you are talking with me."

He was seriously like a cute brother who worried about me in the past days. But I swear I didn't had any mental issues, I just had a huge love-sorrow, and felt like my heart broke into two pieces. That was, what I tried to cure by staying at home and tried to avoid Ethan too a little, because he was the heartbreaker's twin brother, so he doesn't really made it easier. But the twin brother was stubborn but super cute and nice to me and it would hurt too, if I would lose him too, like the heartbreak you know.

Half an hour later we ran around in a Target. At least I did, and Ethan tried to follow me with the cart while I throw everything to the cart what I needed. I felt like I needed almost everything, especially when I thought about the fact, that this morning I even needed to order breakfast. That's so embarrassing and I hated myself for it for sure.

"That's a good game, I liked it " pointed E to one of the box on the self. We checked out the gaming section and really took our time to look around.

" I can't play with anything in here, my pc is at home."

"Maybe I wanna give you a gift" he said with a suspicious smile and grabbed a Xbox from the shelf.

" No, you don't" I shook my head.

"But why? We could play together and it's really not a big deal" he tried to convince me.

"But for real E.."

"Christmas is in two months, early christmas present?" he smiled angelically, that made me laugh and in the end I agreed to the early christmas present. At least it was not just a gift for nothing.

From Target we ended up going to my apartment, where Ethan helped me to bring up the groceries and helped me to put together the xbox. It went pretty quick so from that we played with mario kart for hours. After those long days today was the first, when my thoughts were distracted from Grayson and I could genuinely laugh. I was really grateful to Ethan, once again. In the beginning I thought they are really similar to each other. But now I feel like they are completely different. Ethan is a lot more chilled, not as loud as his brother but a lot more stubborn who has a big heart but he is not too good showing his feelings. He was always so nice and open to me.

After our big game war we ended up being hungry and we only suspended our battle, when our pizza arrived.

"Pineapple to me is belongs to the dessert, not to the pizza" I said, when he opened up his hawaii pizza box next to my margaritha one.

" It's fine, you don't have taste" he said seriously which made me laugh loudly. "Are you gonna tell me why were you so down in the past days?"

When I heard his question I took a big sigh.  I really didn't knew what should I do. Should I just be open to him and look at him like a really good friend and trust in him? Or should I look at him like he is Grayson's twin who is maybe gonna tell everything to him?! It wasn't an easy choice to me.

"But promise me you are not gonna tell anyone"I said emphatically, which made him laugh a little but he immediately nodded. "Promise me" I put up my pinky.

"Promise" he gave me his and took a another big bite from his pizza.

" I mean I think you can guess" I rolled my eyes.

"My brother?" he asked so casually.

"Uhmm.." I moved around and tried to look away from his eyes. Maybe I wasn't ready.

"You fell in love with him?" he asked now more seriously and even hesitated a little. I think he felt how my attitude changed and I was a little tense. He looked deeply to my eyes and tried to read from it, while I struggled with his question. It was something that I didn't confessed even to my own self.

" I don't know" I sighed. " It is sure, that he ghosted me in the worst timing and maybe that's why I can't answer to that question, because I was in the border where this whole thing started to be more serious to me than ever before " I shrugged my shoulder. " I am not really an emotional type, I don't fall in love easily and maybe because of these situations I am trying to look after myself and not open up that easily."

"But there was something, if it sent you down that much.."

"Yeah, of course I kinda hate myself for it to be honest."

"No, please don't.You spent so much time together and never acted like just friends, it is normal that you start to have feelings after these things."

"Yeah, I did things with him that I never with someone else. I've never had a boyfriend and I wasn't used to cuddling and being all cute or having sex.. I tried to not open up and be colder, but I wasn't able to. It was too strong" I sighed again. It was so weird to say out loud these things.

"Woo, he was the first?" he looked at me with big eyes and I just nodded slightly. " That situation is messy" he shook his head. "But in the end of the day you should never be like last week. Even though he is my brother, no one should fuck this whole american trip."

" He didn't fucked up, just broke it a little. I mean he made it more fun but more sad at the same time" I said, and even giggled when I thought about how true it was. He was the reason why it's started so fun and new and now he is the one who made it a little bit tougher as well. " I am fine E, I just needed a little time to be myself again" I smiled honestly and put my hand on his shoulder, and finally it made him smile too.

We spent the next half an hour while we finished the pizza talking about him more. He told me about his past relationships, about his past and about his dreams. It was quiet scary but amazing to me to hear how similar their goals were with Grayson. I felt like every second sentence is something that I already heard from Grayson. They really are lucky to have each other. I am in a really close relationship with my sister, and I could only imagine how close I would be if we would be in the same age and we would experience everything together.

We messed up our chill night when we decided to go out and drive around in the city. I really enjoyed sitting next to Ethan in his bmw while we listened to our favorite music. It was weird how open we were with each other. We sang songs loudly, even though both of our voices was terrible, but we had fun.

Later we ended up in a fast food shop to get some dessert. We sat down with our ice creams in our hands and I just laughed when I saw his annoyed face when I asked him to take some pictures of me to the gram.

" Please tell me you like one" he sighed when he gave back my phone for the second time. The first round ended up herribe and I didn't liked any on the pictures.

" I am sure I will, I don't wanna torture you more" I rolled my eyes and started to eat my ice cream too. "That dude is gonna come here" I said quietly with a big shigh. Ethan tried to look around without being conspicuous but it was late and the guy was already on his way to our table. I was sure he was like ten years older than me, and hated how he stared at us in the past few minutes. I always said I am okay being alone and even going to places alone, but I know that there is so many messed up people in the world and I hated when I started to be afraid of some creepy dude who stared at me. There was a lot creepy guy in America and I love crime shows way too much to not think about herribe stuff what can happen to me. From my crime show thoughts the men's voice snapped me back from next to our table.

"Can I buy something to the pretty lady?" he looked at me and I really tried my smile to not turn into a grimace.

" No I am fine, thank you " I refused his offer politely but frowned my brows when he still not moved and standed there. In the meantime I saw Ethan's annoyed face while he shook his head.

"Maybe at least a drink just to get to know each other?!" he tried again and I already knew I started to lose my patience.

" I said no, what's not understandable?" I asked now a lot more confidently.

"I love challenges.."

"Dude, no means no" snapped Ethan and I saw how angry he got because of him.

" Nonone talked to you."

"Seriously can you leave now before I call the security?" I asked and that finally made him have a few ugly comments on me while he was on his way out." It's the second time when you act like my bodyguard" I said with a light smile to E.

" Idiots are attracted to you I feel like."

"Uhm, yeah I already realized that when I met your brother."

My comment made him laugh loudly and it made me giggle too. After this whole situation we decided to leave. In the parking lot the cold wind hit me but I still wouldn't say that the autumn was cold in LA. It was a little bit cooler than before, but it was still funny to me when I saw how some people already put on a warmer jackets while I still only wore hoodies or even tops and didn't even grabbed a warmer jacket since I was there. October in Hungary is definitely not feel like this.

" Can I drive your car?" I looked up to him when we got to the car. It was a crazy idea, but I still got excited because of it.

" What? Do you have a licence?" he frowned his brows.

"Yeah, but I never drove here so I may or my not gonna crush it, but I am gonna try to not to " I put my hands on the car, which made him roll his eyes while I just laughed.

"Your are not normal" he sighed and tossed the key to me, that I catch with a wild smile. I sat on the driving seat all excited and realized that compared to our high difference there was no way to me to reach the pedals like this, so I tried to move the seat to the right position and looked at him with a grin. His scared face made me laugh slightly.

"I have a licence for 4 years now, don't worry" I rolled my eyes. I joked with him with the crash thing, of course I would never even ask him if I would not trust in myself enough. Even the automatic transmission was the same like in my car at home, maybe the roads are the most different, but he was next to me to help me out if something goes wrong.

The first few miles wasn't too exciting. We went from red lights to red lights with a big traffic around us, but as soon us I turned to a more chill road I was able to press the pedal more and enjoyed how the car accelerated under us.

" I like this car" I said and looked at Ethan for a second who seemed way too chilled. " I thought you are gonna freak out because I drive your car."

" Why? I see that you can drive and enjoy it, I trust in you " he replied, that made me smile again.

" I missed driving. At home there was times when I just drove around without a destination, listened to music and switched of my thoughts and you know, get distracted from shitty stuff. It was like a therapy" I explained. I really left a lot of thing behind, I just had my routine and daily things at home and it's weird to live a completely different life, that looks nothing like the other at home.

"Go ahead, now you can do it. I am in to listen to some music and chill" he said while moved his seat to lay more down to get more comfortable and picked up my phone to connect it to the car's radio.

Like I would at home I started to play my playlist and I just concentrated to the road while enjoyed the music. I genuinely felt like Ethan is some kind of angel in my life, who helped me get through the fact that I wanted to go home and showed me that I should and could enjoy every single second of this trip still, I should just be more open and not get deep so easily with things. I don't have a brother and before I knew him I couldn't even imagine what is it like to have one. But since I know him I feel like I have a brother. And it's really nice to trust someone that much, to say that.

It was almost 2 o'clock in the morning when I parked the car in front of my apartment. I said bye to Ethan with a long hug and went straight to my house. As soon as I stepped to the house, the loneliness peeped again but now it didn't bothered me or made me sad. I felt like this afternoon with Ethan charged me with happiness, even if it was weird before to spend time with him. I always got well with boys, I feel like I have a more girly and gossipy side and I have a more boyish side too who loves to play with video games and other stuff. I knew I can be kinda weird, but that's who I am.

- have new friends √

[mistressarafax]

KaiJou Week - Day 4: Sundae

I went off and did my own thing on this one...

---

As Joey walked into the dining area, he was surprised to find Seto there, sitting at the head of the table and typing away on his laptop. Not that Seto couldn't be sitting in his own dining area. Joey was simply surprised because Seto had been pouring all his time and energy into a big project at work for the last month or so, and Joey hadn't seen him at home during daylight hours for just as long.

"What are ya doin' home so early?" he asked.

"Nothing."

It was obviously not the truth, and Joey pursed his lips in mild irritation. "You're here for a reason."

"Do I need a reason to be in my own house?" Seto asked, finally looking up from his computer and fixing Joey with an unimpressed stare.

"Well...no. But you've been busy and don't usually get here 'til way later. It's just surprisin' is all. Ya get your project done or somethin'?"

Seto closed his computer and sighed. "More or less. There's a little finalizing that has to be done, but I thought perhaps we could get dinner tonight."

"Ya couldn't have just said that when I first asked what ya were doin' here?"

A smirk graced Seto's lips, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Where would the fun be if I made it that easy?"

Joey rolled his eyes. Apparently, Seto was in a mood. Not that he especially minded. A playful, good-natured Seto often carried over into the bedroom, and he wouldn't complain at the prospect of getting laid even if Seto was being difficult on purpose. Especially after a month where Seto's work had been keeping their sex life almost nonexistent.

"Ya got somewhere in mind?" Joey asked.

Seto nodded. "I set out an outfit for you."

Joey furrowed his eyebrows. This whole thing sounded extremely planned out if Seto had picked out an outfit for him. Which only made him wonder if he was forgetting something. An important date or an anniversary of some sort. He was wracking his brain, trying to go through all the possibilities.

Seto's deep, amused chuckle brought him out of his thoughts. "Go get dressed. You haven't forgotten anything."

Joey shook his head in disbelief, heading to their shared bedroom in order to change. When he got there, he pulled his t-shirt over his head, sliding down his pants before locating what Seto had pulled out for him. Surprisingly, it wasn't anything too crazy. A pair of khaki shorts and a pastel green polo. It was a rather casual selection for Seto, and it only made Joey more curious about where they were going.

He got dressed quickly and rejoined Seto in the dining room. The brunet had packed away his computer, leaning against the dining room table while he looked through his phone. Joey realized he was wearing a casual outfit too. Seto casual, at least. Blue slacks, white button-down, and a complementary tie. Less dressed up than what Seto normally wore into work on a daily basis.

Joey didn't comment on it and followed Seto to the car. Even fifteen minutes into their journey, Joey still didn't know exactly where they were headed, though he had a few guesses based on the general area. Could have been Thai or Korean. Also, one of Seto's favorite French restaurants was around, though they were far too underdressed for it to be where they were headed.

It wasn't until Seto pulled into the parking lot that Joey figured it out. A steak and seafood restaurant. They hadn't been there more than three times in the past, but Joey recalled that it wasn't bad. Not that he ever really complained about food. Seto was the one who was picky, and he hadn't had any complaints either.

A waiter seated them on the balcony, giving them a fantastic view of Domino City as they looked through the menu. Seto ordered them a bottle of chardonnay to share, and Joey sipped at his while he made his dinner choices. Fried calamari as an appetizer. Steak and shrimp for dinner. 

Orders placed, Joey reached across the table and took Seto's hand. "There really no special reason we're here?"

Seto shook his head. "Not particularly. I wanted to spend time with you since I've been busy lately."

Joey smiled softly, pleased. Seto openly expressing his feelings always hits this pleasant note in his heart. "It is nice to see ya outside of bed for once," he teased. "I almost forgot what you liked like."

Seto rolled his eyes. "As if you could forget."

A grin formed on his face. "You're right. I like your face too much to forget it."

"Only my face?" Seto asked with an eyebrow quirked.

Joey could read that expression and all the insinuation behind it. He was definitely getting laid tonight. A flush crept up his neck. "Among other things," he admitted, quietly enough that only Kaiba would hear.

Kaiba smirked. "Good."

"You're in a good mood today," Joey noted. "It's kinda weird, ya know? You're usually grumpy at the end of a project."

Kaiba shook his head, taking a sip of wine as the calamari arrived.

Joey took a bite, marveling at how delicious the food was. "God, this is good."

"Mmm," Kaiba agreed.

"So you're sure nothin' good happened?"

"Trust me, Joseph. I'm just pleased to spend time with you."

"Distance makin' your heart grow fonder?" Joey asked.

"Something like that," Kaiba said neutrally.

Joey just shook his head and turned his attention back to eating the pre-dinner appetizer. Their dishes arrived not long after that, and Joey wondered why they hadn't come to this restaurant more frequently. It was easily one of the best places he'd been with Seto.

"I was going to get you dessert, as well," Seto said as he paid the bill. "There's an ice cream shop right across the street."

Part of Joey couldn't escape the looming feeling of worry that came with Seto being so considerate. Extreme thoughtfulness usually was a precursor to some kind of announcement that Seto was going be doing something Joey wouldn't like in the near future. Whether it was a banquet or dinner party or work trip, Seto often tried to soften the blow with a nice dinner. This didn't feel the same as those. Seto was in an upbeat, almost playful mood, and it didn't fit with his usual approach to delivering bad news.

They stood up, walking across the street hand in hand. Walking into the ice cream parlor, Joey marveled at all the flavor choices. Seto ordered immediately, opting for a vanilla cone. Joey decided quickly after that that he wanted a strawberry shortcake sundae.

He eagerly awaited his frozen confection, nearly bouncing beside Seto. "Calm down," Seto reprimanded gently.

"I'm just excited. I love strawberries, and strawberry shortcake sundaes are delicious."

"Do you love them than me?"

"Maybe," Joey teased. "Not sure which I couldn't live without. You or strawberries? It's a tough call."

"We can see how much you enjoy taking a strawberry up the ass then and find out."

Joey looked up at him. His delivery had been perfectly serious. Like he sincerely meant it and would give it a try when they got home. Joey shuddered at the thought. "Oh, fuck no. No way in hell are ya stickin' a strawberry up my ass."

Seto smirked, amused, and Joey wondered if he'd been replaced by an alien. He was being weird. Like the kind of weird Kaiba normally wasn't. "Seriously, what's up with you today? Are ya on drugs?"

"No. To be perfectly honest, Mokuba lectured me earlier about how much you missed me and how I shouldn't let work dictate my life so much. I'm just..trying to take his advice to heart."

"I did miss ya," Joey said. "I like spendin' time with ya. When ya ain't threatenin' to shove fruit in my orifices, at least."

"Noted," Seto said.

Joey finished up his sundae, sighing out in satisfaction. Seto finished his cone neatly seconds later, and Joey leaned close to him, taking his hand. "Though there's something else ya got that I wouldn't mind havin' in an orifice or two."

Kaiba gave him a sideways glance, an eyebrow raised suggestively. "Then I suppose we better get home then," he mused.

"Oh yeah," Joey agreed.

Hand in hand, they hurried back to Kaiba's car. A long, sweaty night awaited them, and Joey was eager to get started. It had been too long since the last time, and he was not passing up the offer Kaiba had been dangling in front of him all night. No way in hell.

[beomgyuslittleheart-blog]

Masuri Suri

Stage magician Taegyu au

Chapter 4: Don't Jinx Yourself

Taehyun slammed his apartment door shut and collapsed onto the couch. Snatching up a pillow and holding it tightly, he tried to ignore the frustration building in his chest. Who the hell does he think he is? he thought angrily. He tried to bite back tears, but he couldn’t keep in the small whimper that left his mouth.

“Tae are you okay?”

He screamed, instinctively throwing the pillow at where the voice had come from. Kai let out a yelp and ducked. Taehyun stared at him blankly. “How- how did you even get in here?” He asked in a hushed voice.

A smirk graced Kai’s lips as he held up a small key. “Remember a few months ago when you were sick and you begged me to bring you cherry ice cream because you thought it’d be your last meal on earth?”

Taehyun sighed but said nothing, wringing his hands in his lap. The couch dipped as Kai sat beside him, slotting an arm around his shoulder. “You’re really good at avoiding my questions, ya know.”

“Huh? Oh…yeah I’m, I’m okay.” He winced at how unconvincing his words were. Kai shook his head but held a smile, rubbing his hand along Taehyun’s arm softly. The kind gesture broke Taehyun and the tears he was holding came tumbling out. “I don’t know why I went or what I expected, but I wish I had never left my house.” His voice cracked. “He mocked me, made me feel like such a joke. I don’t know what I did to him, but I don’t deserve him making me look like a fool.“

“Tae, slow down. What happened, who hurt you, who am I fighting?” Kai asked, pulling the crying boy close to him.

“That stupid hack,” was all Taehyun could manage to get out.

“Ah…Beomgyu? What did he do?”

Taehyun sniffled, wiping his nose on his sleeve. “He wanted to meet at the bookstore, asked me to teach him that paper trick. I should’ve never done that stupid trick in the first place, I should’ve just walked right out of that venue and into the street and into oncoming traffic.”

Kai snorted, ruffling Taehyun’s hair. “I’m glad you didn’t, Tae,” he said softly.

He looked up at Kai’s gentle expression and offered him a weak smile in return. “I met him at the bookstore and I showed him how to do it, but he just kept saying stupid comments like,” Taehyun twisted his voice into a mocking tone, “‘Wow you’re so talented’ or ‘you must be good with your hands’.

Kai was silent for a moment, before speaking hesitantly, “Those sound like compliments to me…”

“Well, they weren’t!” Taehyun shouted, causing Kai to flinch. Lowering his voice, he kept going, “He was mocking me, Kai. He must’ve been pissed off that I was rude to him at his show and thought it’d be a great idea to drag me out in public and make me look like an idiot.” Leaning back into the sofa, he covered his face with his hands.

A soft buzz echoed in the silence. He slid his hands down to his chin, looking at his phone in fear, but saw Kai holding his own phone and typing rapidly with a goofy grin on his face. Taehyun continued, “He had me show him how to do the trick like six times, and I know he probably understood it even before I taught him, he just wanted me to explain such a basic dumb trick to prove how his magic is better than mine. It especially hurt when he kept looking at his phone instead of his best friend who was pouring his heart out to him.”

Kai hummed while nodding, not looking up. Tae hit him with a pillow. “Ouch! What was that for?” the boy demanded.

“For ignoring me.” Taehyun crossed his arms, frowning.

Kai put his phone on the coffee table and turned to face him. “I’m sorry. I’m here, I’m focused Tae.” His phone buzzed again and his eyes flicked to the screen impulsively.

“Seriously?” Taehyun grumbled. He shot Kai a dirty look as the boy reached for his phone again.

“I’m listening Tae, just let me put my phone on silent.” Taehyun could see his eyes darting back and forth as he read something on the screen. He rolled his eyes and stood up, walking towards the kitchen. “Don’t worry about it, I don’t feel like talking about that asshole anymore.”

Kai put his phone down and trailed his eyes after Taehyun before resting his head on the back of the couch and giving his best pout. The other didn’t bother to look at him, instead pulling two small cups from the cabinet and setting them beside the stove. “So what has you so excited that you’re glued to your phone?” he asked tentatively, flicking the burner on.

Kai couldn’t help the grin that bloomed on his face. He tilted his head and gave the ceiling a dreamy gaze. “He’s a who, not a what, and what he is, is an incredibly cuddly bunny.” He heard a laugh from the kitchen that was quickly smothered by the sound of the kettle whistling. After a minute, Taehyun walked into the living room and placed two steaming cups on the table. “What’d you make me?” Kai asked, waving his hand over his cup excitedly.

“Hot cocoa, do you even drink anything else?” Taehyun asked rhetorically. “So, let me get this straight. You’re texting a rabbit?”

Kai giggled and patted Taehyun on the tummy. “No silly! How could a bunny even type on a phone, they only have teeny wittle paws.” He held up his hands, pretending to have paws. Taehyun deeply considered why he was friends with this adult-shaped child. “He’s not a rabbit, he just looks like a rabbit, if rabbits looked like tall, adorably clumsy, super smart men.”

Taehyun made puking noises and Kai hit him playfully. “And how did you meet this bunny man?” he asked, blowing on his tea before gingerly taking a sip.

Kai blushed. The boy was practically vibrating with happiness. “His name is Soobin, he’s a specialty vet who visited our clinic last week. Tae, he’s so cute oh my gosh. He doesn’t work at a clinic like me, he travels to farms and stuff and he even said he might be able to get me into the off-limits areas at the zoo. You know what’s at the zoo, Tae? Penguins! He could take me to see penguins!” He sighed contently, drinking his cocoa with a hum. “He’s perfect.”

Taehyun put a smile on his face. “He sounds great, I’m happy for you Kai.” And he was, or at least he was trying to be. He wished he could have something, anything, resembling love, even puppy love like this. Kai was always trying to get him to open up to others, to let someone in, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He had tried in the past, but every failed relationship had just left Taehyun more hollow inside. He hated being alone, but being vulnerable like that was too much of a risk. What if eventually there was nothing left of him but a broken shell? What if no one was genuinely capable of loving him? …Did he even deserve to be loved?

“…think he’d actually be interested in me, but he asked for my number before he left! You should’ve seen him, he’s so cute when he’s nervous! So I gave it to him and we’ve been messaging ever since. He said the last animal he worked with was a tiger, a tiger! Can you imagine? I bet that’s really scary, just like when your friend who just accused you of not listening isn’t listening to you either.” Kai gave Taehyun a sideways glance, catching the pensive look on the brunette’s face. He was about to snap his fingers to get the boys attention, but thought better of it at the last moment and instead he put his hand on Taehyun’s knee, drawing him out of his thoughts. “What if they really were compliments?”

Confusion swept over Taehyun’s face, quickly overtaken by disregard. “They weren’t,” he said firmly.

“Okay, okay, at least hear me out first, yeah? For all your observation skills, reading people isn’t really your strong suit.” Taehyun couldn’t disagree.. “I don’t know what makes you so sure he was mocking you, but I’m not convinced. There’s definitely a chance that he was being genuine.”

Taehyun felt his chest lurch again and a weight gather in his throat. “Are you saying that he was actually flirting with me?” he asked quietly, staring at the floor with unfocused eyes.

Kai nodded eagerly. “There’s a possibility, yeah.”

After a long moment Taehyun looked up with an unreadable expression. “Gross.”

+×+

“I…I think I fucked up, Jun.” Beomgyu sat at the kitchen table, head in his hands. He was burning a hole through the table with his eyes when a plate of food slid into his line of sight. He glanced up. Yeonjun was standing beside him, lips curled in a small smile. “Oh no, don’t you start pitying me, you know I hate when you do that, Jun…You can still make me depression waffles, though,” he said, picking up a fork and timidly picking at the warm dessert in front of him. He had even went through the trouble of adding strawberries and whipped cream.

Yeonjun dropped into the seat beside Beomgyu. “I mean daily, but what happened this time?”

He threw a napkin at the grey-haired boy, who dodged it easily. Groaning, he whispered, “I scared him off…”

“I’m sorry, who are we talking about?” Yeonjun asked, puzzled.

Beomgyu sat still for a moment, stabbing his waffle absentmindedly. “I met someone, at my show the other day. He’s a magician too, came to my signing after and did a cute trick for me where he pretended to crumple up my photo. Sure, it was a bit,” he paused, searching for the right word, “…vaguely threatening?…but I thought maybe he’s just coming on strong, ya know? So I gave him my number and I thought he was interested when he first messaged me, but he turned cold when I replied. I chalked it up to him being nervous, and asked him out. I said I wanted him to teach me that trick. He accepted, though now that I think about it, I don’t think he knew I meant it as a date…” He sighed, pushing his plate away from him. “Anyway, when we met I tried flirting with him, but he just kept brushing it off. I can’t take a fucking hint apparently and didn’t know how irritated he was until he got up and stormed out…”

Yeonjun nodded solemnly, sliding the waffle in front of him and grabbing Beomgyu’s fork. “Yeah, it sounds like you fucked up dude.”

Beomgyu rested his head on the back of his chair, looking at Yeonjun with a blank expression. “You’re always so supportive, Junie,” his voice was edged with playful sarcasm.

“It’s why you love me,” Yeonjun retorted with a smirk. He cut off a big piece of Beomgyu’s waffle and ate it, twirling the fork in his hand before pointing it at Beomgyu. “If I know anything about your sorry ass, and I do, it’s that you’re persistent. So quit moping and try talking to him again. Maybe try not to be as much of an obnoxious flirt this time and talk to him like a human being instead of a potential fling.”

“You make me sound so creepy!” Beomgyu complained, sticking his tongue out at him.

“Well, ya did freak the poor kid out,” he shot back.

“Shut up…” Beomgyu said weakly. He went silent for a minute, watching Yeonjun eat his waffle. “…what do I even say to him?”

Yeonjun finished chewing and said, “You’re a magician, why don’t you do a trick for him back?”

Beomgyu hummed in contemplation. “I’ll give it a shot, I guess. Probably can’t fuck up more than I already have.”

“Don’t jinx yourself.”

+×+

Taehyun’s mood improved significantly after spending the rest of the day with Kai. Sure, the boy had spent nearly the whole time gushing about Soobin, but he enjoyed playfully teasing him about his crush. Taehyun learned that Soobin was an animal behaviorist, and that his favorite colors were sky blue and yellow which Kai was determined to wear every day just in case the man showed up at his clinic again. He enjoyed seeing Kai so upbeat, his happiness was infectious. They had ordered take out and sat on the floor watching bad movies on tv until it had gotten dark out. By the end of the day, Taehyun was laughing easily.

Now that he was alone though, he felt the conflicted thoughts from earlier creeping back into his mind. He shook his head, desperately trying to escape the overwhelming feeling of anxiety. It occurred to him that meditation usually helped him concentrate and relax, so he pulled up some white noise on his phone and climbed into bed. Closing his eyes, he focused on each part of his body, willing it to release the tension it held.

He had been meditating for almost an hour, nearly falling asleep, when the audio from his phone cut out. That’s unusual, the file is like twelve hours long, he thought. Slowly, he brought himself back to awareness. When he opened his eyes, he saw moonlight pooling on his bedside table. What time even is it? He stretched a bit before grabbing his phone and turning on the screen. Once again, he was shocked by what he saw.

Hesitantly he clicked on the video, unaware that the pace of his breathing had quickened. He watched as Beomgyu’s hands moved into frame and picked up the paper. Slowly he crushed it and ‘smoothed’ it back out, exactly as Taehyun had taught him earlier. Only, he had added his own twist…

Taehyun could feel his hands trembling, his vision blurring with tears. What is he doing to me? He threw his phone across the bed, mind racing. Suddenly, he dove after it, pulling up Beomgyu’s message. He typed and erased and typed again. Every word came out wrong, he couldn’t figure out the right words to say. Nothing felt right, but he typed one last message and hit send. Out of fear he turned his phone off and closed his eyes, wishing for sleep he knew that would not come.

[keener-esme]

the luxury of loneliness

ft: zig novak & esme song description: after frankie’s anonymous text forces her to reveal some of esme’s reckless activities, zig comes to her house in the middle of the night to check on her. date: february 14th location: esme’s house tw: mentions of drug use

Esme wasn't going into the day with high hopes as it was; she'd never been much of a Valentine's savant, and if she hadn't owed Fiona a favor, she'd have stayed home altogether. She was indifferent to the whole idea, and while she didn't have a terrible time after Declan salvaged the evening off campus, she never saw Frankie's conduct coming. It was a shock to say the least, and, coming after Esme offered to end her tryst with Zig, one she didn't think she deserved. Thinking it a salvageable enough idea to watch movies on the couch, the house empty for the night save for herself, Esme rummaged through the kitchen for a quick dinner idea, settling on the leftover pint of ice cream in the freezer. Satisfied with the selection, she settled down onto the sofa, drifting to sleep until hearing the knock on the door. She stood there for a moment, curiously. Her dad wouldn't be home all night, and he obviously had keys. Miles wouldn't know she was home. That left Frankie as the most reasonable person, come to apologize. Unsure if she wanted to face her, she paused to take a spoonful of the dessert in her hands, figuring she'd have to see Frankie at some point. Walking to the door, she took a deep breath before pulling it open, not expecting anyone else to be on the other side. "Zig," she greeted, confused. She stepped aside, silently inviting him in.

Zig wasn’t one for school sanctioned social gatherings. He found them to be pointless, especially one with a Valentine’s Day theme. It was a holiday for love, and as far as he knew, there was nobody he’d even come close to loving at the moment. For that reason, he considered the dance to be a waste of time. Rather, he spent his time at the ravine, downing Coronas and hitting on any pretty face that walked his way. The text from Frankie had caught him off guard. Esme was the last person he intended to put his focus on that night. The fact that she’d been mad at him was starting to get to him, for some strange reason. He had hoped the rose would help to ease the tension, but he had become quite frustrated with himself for even caring in the first place. He had hurt plenty of girls in the past and never thought twice about it, so why was this different? He looked at his phone, briefly took a look at this ‘Micah’ guy’s Instagram, then requested the address from Frankie. His initial reaction was to ignore her pleas and tell Miles to take care of it, considering the two were most likely closer than her and Zig. He decided against bickering with Frankie on the topic though, since she did seem genuinely worried over Esme’s well-being. He tossed his beer can into the trash, offered a halfhearted goodbye to those at the Ravine, and headed towards the direction of Esme’s house. His navigation app had informed him the walk wouldn’t be long, luckily. After a while, Zig finally reached a house that caused him to audibly groan with annoyance. Of course, she was rich. No wonder her and Miles got along so well. Surely, they must’ve spent their time bragging about their riches and looking down on people like him. The smarter part of Zig told him that Esme wasn’t like that, but the part consumed by envy was ready to turn around and call it all off. Instead, he sighed and knocked on the door, knowing very well that a part of him worried for the other’s well-being as well. “Hey,” He smiled, eyes widening as he took note of the elegant decor in her home. “So you weren’t gonna tell me that you were completely loaded?” He raised an eyebrow. The only other house he’s been in that could match the adornment of this one was the Hollingsworth residence. “Whatever, that’s not important. Are you... okay?” He asked with a bit of hesitance, wondering if she’d actually give him a straightforward answer.

Esme Zig was the last face she thought she'd be ending the night facing. She didn't expect him to take part in the festivities she herself was strong armed into, so she couldn't rightfully anticipate him to; romance wasn't for either of them. So it was all the more intriguing to be face to face with him now. "I didn't think it mattered," she responded truthfully, raising a matching eyebrow at the confusing greeting. It hadn't ever crossed her mind that her family wealth was something of importance, least of all to Zig, who didn't know much else about her. "But hello to you too, I guess? You can come in," she invited awkwardly, ushering him in off of the porch he lingered on. "Why would I not be okay?"

Zig paused for a moment. He supposed she was right, but the fact still bothered him. It almost made him feel like the two came from completely different worlds now, despite feeling so similar in the past. “Maybe because I heard you were coked out with Declan Coyne and some guy named Micah. God... that stuff’s dangerous, Esme. You shouldn’t just go off doing it with random guys.” He almost sounded like a scolding father, which was ironic coming from Zig, who always seemed to be the bad influence in all of his relationships. Zig was never one for the harder drugs though, preferring a simple blunt over anything that needed to be ingested or snorted. “I don’t mean to sound like a dick, sorry,” He murmured, knowing his mouth was what got him into trouble with Esme last time. “But why do you have to do that stuff? The coke and the pills?”

Esme's night was only getting stranger, certainly not pacified by how oddly concerned Zig's face appeared to grow. It was strange enough to have him at her doorstep at such an hour, but to hear his sudden chastise was flooring, her eyes widening at the specific knowledge he suddenly possessed. "What the fuck?" She nearly choked, her hands raising to stop him from continuing. "I... wow, okay, first of all, that's not what I was doing with Declan. And how the hell do you know Micah? No random guys, what are you even saying? Why are you here?" Lifting one hand to her temple, her other reached back to the forgotten ice cream, anxiously taking a heaping spoonful as she walked farther into the house.

Zig crossed his arms over his chest, almost irritated that Esme seemed completely fine despite Frankie's evident concern. "Okay, then what were you doing with Declan?" He questioned, anticipating an answer that he most likely didn't want. "I... I just know, okay? Who it came from doesn't matter. I'm here because I was worried about you." It was probably best not to dance around the subject and simply be straightforward, as much as he didn't want to admit that a part of him was starting to care for the girl. "Which I guess was pointless since you seem okay to me."

Esme lifted her eyebrows as if to question his audacity - and perhaps his sanity. Who was he to be pressing her for answers, especially if he still hadn't explained why he was, or how he'd found out any of the things he was prodding into. "I don't think that's really any of your business," she returned calmly, stabbing the spoon into her carton to set it on the kitchen island. "He's a friend. The dance was a mess so we left and had a better time," she explained, not out of the feeling of owing him, but because she could tell he wasn't one to let up. She didn't accept his answer, too bare and vague for her liking, and she mentally recounted anyone who had known her at both school, a small enough list to narrow it down quickly enough. "Did... did Frankie tell you all of this? She sent you here to babysit me?"

Zig rolled his eyes at her response, wondering why he even expected a real answer from Esme in the first place. In the beginning, he liked the fact that Esme was shrouded in mystery— things were easier that way since they both only came to each other for one thing in particular. Now, he found it a bit bothersome that every time he tried to make any type of connection beyond sex, Esme was far too keen on pushing him away. "Well, I'm glad you two had lots of fun together, then," he responded with heavy sarcasm and a sudden urge to pummel a rich kid. At the mention of Frankie, he knew there was no denying that she was the one who passed along the information. "Really? Frankie didn't send me over here to babysit. She wanted me to make sure you were okay. Is it that hard to believe that she just cares about you?"

Esme "I didn't see you at the dance, so I can only assume you were having just as much fun," she accused, picking up on his upset. "Do we have a problem here?" He queried, aggression in her tone. Her eyes narrowed, at an utter loss to why he was so unhappy that she'd spent any amount of time with Declan. To her knowledge, they didn't have issue with one another, so it couldn't have been personal, and past that Esme had no idea what to think. At the confirmation that Frankie had outed her, Esme shook her head. "Unbelievable, that little bitch," she scoffed, reaching for her cell phone. It was a shock to say the least, and, coming after Esme offered to end her tryst with Zig, one she didn't think she deserved. But the damage was done, and it would seem that Frankie succeeded whatever in whatever her plan was. It was just sex, Esme reminded herself, so it wouldn't be the end of the world if Zig never spoke to her again. That was the logical way to see things, but her heart wasn't making that connection, giving her that sinking feeling since she'd answered the door. "She cares so much that she booked it from the dance the second she saw me - and left Declan, who was her date, if you really need someone to be mad at."

Zig "I haven't had 'fun' with anyone else in... shit, how long has it been?" The question was enough to make Zig stop in his tracks and try to recall the last time he hooked up with anyone who wasn't Esme. It must've been a month at least. Though, this choice was not intentional as far as he knew. He simply excused his behavior with laziness as opposed to anything else, knowing the draining effects of talking to more than one girl at once. "I don't have a problem, I came to check up on you. That's it. If you want me to leave I'll leave." It wasn't as if he felt the most comfortable there anyways what with being so out of place. "Whoa, hey, chill with the name calling. She's your friend, right? The one you drunk texted me about not wanting to lose? I'm sure there's a reason why she did it, so why don't you talk to her before getting pissy about it?" He suggested with such eloquence. "I don't wanna be mad at anyone, okay? I didn't come to yell at you or anything. Maybe to tell you that what you're doing is stupid, yeah, but I'm not mad." If there was anyone to be angry at, it was himself for even caring in the first place.

Esme, while still annoyed by his assumptions, was a little surprised to hear of Zig's unintentional loyalty to her. She'd figured he was running around with a stockpile of other girls in town, never giving it much thought, but now hearing the very opposite confirmed, she wondered why he didn't use his charm to his advantage. "Oh." she responded, feeling a touch of awkwardness that she couldn't say the same. His offer of retreat would normally be something she accepted straight away, had she not sent him away at the doorstep, but she couldn't bring herself to want the departure. Maybe she just didn't want to leave things with such a looming air of tension since she already had so many other important people not on her side. But was Zig important too? She stayed quiet, effectively allowing him to stay, and the silence continued through the small lecture. She set down her phone, knowing that in some sense he was right, as awful as it was to admit it. "She had no right to tell you about that stuff," she defended softly, seating herself at the island. Her eyes moved up to meet his, glowering for a moment at his insult. "I don't do it that often, and I'm sure you do your share of stupid things too, so I don't know if you're the right person to be telling me this. I'm fine, you said it yourself," she repeated, gesturing down at her body, now very aware she was still in her gown.

Zig took a seat next to her, sighing audibly as he did so. He nodded his head in agreement at her statement, also understanding that Esme had every right to her own privacy. Realizing this also made him realize that his visit may have seemed far too invasive. Granted, he never would have come if he knew she just got home from spending the night with Declan, but even so he felt somewhat bad for barging in unannounced. "You're right... I don't know if this helps, but I don't really plan on telling anyone, so..." If the information Frankie provided was meant to be kept a secret, then Zig would do his best to keep it that way. "I do a handful of dumb things everyday," He agreed. "But nothing that'll kill me... for the most part." Zig has made plenty of bad decisions in his lifetime, but none that he would ever consider life threatening— illegal, maybe, but not deadly. "And why do you have to look so good in that damn dress thing?" Even when she made no attempt to do so, she still managed to look captivating in anything she wore. He hated how attracted he could be to her, even in moments like this.

Esme could feel the rising unsettle in her stomach, a number of sources responsible. Most could be explained away easily enough, but Zig wasn't one of them. The sudden nerves as his tone softened, how she chose to believe his assurance. It was unlike her to put as much thought into relationships of any sort, but she wanted to be able to trust him, a far cry from the bare bones unions she'd forged with most anyone else. She shrugged at his promise, drumming her hand on the discarded and melting ice cream to appear casual. "I'm fine, Zig," she repeated, abashed. It took a moment to register that his next question was a statement, and not the aggravating line of inquiries, peering back over to him with a growing smile. "Low standards probably," she joked, struggling to accept the compliment in a lighter setting. Anxiously -for no good reason-, she combed her hands through her hair, messy from the impromptu couch nap, trying to pull it back into place, but it was a lost cause draped around her shoulders.

Zig watched as her fingers became tangled in a mess of raven waves, suddenly noticing that this was the first time he had ever seen her with her hair down. No matter how dirty they got in the past, her hair always managed to stay in its signature braid. "Why don't you wear it like that more?" He gestured to her head. "It looks pretty— not that you don't look pretty with your usual thing, but..." He turned away, suddenly feeling a bit awkward over how drawn to her he was. "Oh, hey, looks like your ice cream's a puddle now. Sorry, I guess I kinda distracted you from it."

Esme tried to brush the hair away before Zig noticed it was out of its usual state, but he was always one step ahead. "It's a long story," she cringed, letting the hair fall where it may. "Old habits die hard I guess. Clearly," she chuckled tensely, a nod to her others. Her hair had become a defensive mechanism over the years, something she didn't plan on becoming so strict about, but by now there was no going back. She'd forgotten about the ice cream she'd abandoned, only glancing over when Zig mentioned the state of it, Esme moving away to wipe the counter clean. "It's like, three in the morning," she announced, trying to center herself and pull away from the frighteningly sincere moment she wasn't prepared to handle. "Do you-" she paused, confirming in her head that she was okay with what she was about to offer. "You can stay here if you want. My dad went to see my mom, so he won't be back until tomorrow."

Zig nodded his head in understanding, aware that he would not be hearing that 'long story' anytime soon. Baby steps, he supposed. After Esme mentioned the time, he instinctively went to glance at his phone to confirm the numbers on his home screen. "Your dad's going to see your mom? So she doesn't live with you guys... but he still visits her?— y'know what never mind. Yeah, I'll stay." To him, it sounded like an oddly messy divorce, but he had done enough prying for the night, and decided it was best to drop the subject altogether. A sudden wave of exhaustion had overcome him anyways after realizing how late it was, and he was no longer in the mood to talk. "I've always kinda wanted to see how your bedroom looks," he noted, rising from his seat and waiting for Esme to lead the way.

Esme was kicking herself once again; it was a with terrible ease that she kept dangling breadcrumbs of her past into Zig's lap lately when it was something she damn well prided herself in keeping to herself with anyone else. Her only solace was that he didn't press the matter of her parents' situation, one she wasn't willing to unload. From the time Zig arrived, her state was different, and she was having a hard time getting a grasp on things. This wasn't in her repertoire, and it definitely wasn't part of the arrangement she and Zig had going, but there was no denying that it was a relief that he agreed to stay with her. "Okay," she accepted, flicking off the light behind her. She didn't plan on explaining her aversion to being alone, and it was a convenient excuse to use the time as a reason why it was beneficial to him, and nothing more. Ushering up the stairs and into her bedroom, she held her arms out for sarcastic fanfare. "Hope it's everything you wished for," she teased, turning her back to him with an "unzip me?"

Zig followed along up the stairs and to her bedroom, one that he found to be quite normal looking. A very anticlimactic reveal, indeed. Though, he supposed the excitement was about to begin now that Esme was literally asking him to undress her. He nodded obediently, moving closer so he could get a grip on the tiny slider and unzip her outfit. He watched as the dress fell to the ground, revealing Esme's bare skin that he had now been so accustomed to feeling. "So... are you gonna put your pj's on now or...?" For the first time, Zig felt a bit awkward initiating anything amorous towards her— like it wasn't the right moment despite Esme being stripped down to the bare essentials.

Esme hadn't meant her undressing to be anything more than a bedtime task, but that didn't mean she couldn't run with it. "You don't like seeing me naked anymore?" She purred, turning to face him and as a result, fully expose her bare skin. Initially it was nothing but a joke at his expense but now that she was able to see his face, she couldn't find the same lust in his eyes that her nudity always unearthed, and that made her much more nervous then being so physically vulnerable in the first place. It was suddenly very necessary to Esme to remind them both of who they were to each other, whether she really wanted to or not. "Should we..." she trailed, walking her fingers down his chest and down to his waistline.

Zig couldn't help but smile at her question. They both knew very well how heavily attracted they were to each other, but he wondered if there was anything beyond lust. "Uh... do you wanna just... sleep?" He almost felt dirtier asking for that as opposed to sex. Him and Esme never slept together in the literal sense— the act may have been too intimate for the both of them. "I mean, I'm down for anything!— But you're probably tired, and so am..." There was also the fact that she had just spent a night with Declan Coyne too, and knowing Esme, their plans went far beyond drugs and friendly conversation. Choosing to push that aside and not get worked up over it again, he offered a slightly uncomfortable smile.

Esme wasn't sure if it was offense that she was feeling; truthfully she wasn't sure how to feel at all about his dismissal, as uncomfortably polite as he presented it. She wasn't used to rejection, especially never from Zig but she knew by the way he backpedaled that it was a rejection nonetheless and even though she wasn't offering her services for her own benefit, it was a strange sting for him to want something so passive instead. The gut feeling was back that lines were being blurred, and prior to this night she never would have seen herself sharing a bed in such an innocent matter with the boy in question but she could acknowledge the relief she felt all the same. "Yeah... I'm pretty tired," she confirmed, swallowing the embarrassment of asking in the first place. Taking a step back from him, she stepped into her bathroom to wash off the evenings makeup, retrieving and ingesting a couple of routine medications before pulling a robe from the back of the door to sheathe herself, now feeling far too naked in more senses than one.

Zig made an attempt to clear up any misunderstandings, but by then it was most likely too late. "Not that I don't want to... but we don't have to have sex every time we see each other... do we?" The question was almost asked in earnest, as he pondered where exactly their relationship stood at the moment— or if they even had one, for that matter. When Esme agreed, he took a seat on the bed and waited patiently to complete her nightly rituals. Upon seeing her emerge from the bathroom, he groaned. "Shit, you look good in a robe too," He commented with false irritation before laying down and patting the spot next to him. "Ready?"

Esme wouldn't say that it was upsetting to hear Zig press the matter of their connection necessarily, but it did leave her feeling unsettled. "Isn't that our whole thing?" Her words held no ill will, really asking herself for clarification more than anything, but it was a double edged sword she walked along to hear what his answer might be. Pulling away from the too real moment, she couldn't help but smile at his admiration, one that had been growing on her. "I try," she teased, smoothing the plush fabric over her thighs. Standing at the edge of the bed she asked herself the same question... was she ready? Even though she'd been the one to offer, would she make it through the night beside him with her sanity in tact? It was noticeably more awkward to just linger at the side of the bed, so she put her qualms aside, peeling back her side of the bedding and slipping in beside him. "Yep," she chimed, too eager as she reached for the remote at her end table to turn off the lights above them.

Zig nodded slowly at her question, "Well, yeah... I guess so. Maybe it doesn't have to be though." The two had an unspoken agreement on what they both wanted out of their fling, but now Zig questioned where his true desires laid. He thought sex was the only thing he really got from Esme. Looking back though, he realized that maybe, just maybe he wanted more. It couldn't have been a coincidence that she was the only girl he hooked up with now, originally blaming it on his own laziness, but perhaps a part of him knew that wasn't the whole truth. In all honesty, Esme was the only girl who could capture his interest outside of the bedroom. Was this... a crush? Was Zig Novak actually developing a schoolboy crush on someone? The thought alone made him shift uneasily on the bed, but he began to relax at Esme's confirmation. As the two got into bed, he moved closer to wrap an arm around her figure. He assumed the whole ordeal would be awkward, but after settling into a comfortable position, everything felt... right. "Well... goodnight, I guess," He murmured, nestling his head closer to hers and taking in the scent of her flowery shampoo.

Esme figured the worst would be over just with the words exchanged, but the physical nature was the most dire. It was a sick irony, considering the basis of her relationship with the boy who now looked far too comfy in her bed, but she'd never quite mastered the intimacy aspect that was being thrown her way presently. She wasn't good with feelings -not that she was allowing herself to catch any-, nor did she ever see the point in making meaningful connections. She knew herself, and they wouldn't be built to last. Turning on her side as if facing away from him would calm her nerves, she tensed at the arm splayed around her, accepting it after a moment to save face. "Goodnight," she returned quietly, counting down the minutes until her sedatives would rescue her from the web she'd woven herself into.

[thisislizheather]

March Magic

Forgive the lateness of this post, but March was a busy month so LET’S TALK ABOUT IT.

So after leaving Ipsy last year (for various reasons), I’ve missed receiving a little package every month full of makeup samples. I was all set to try Birchbox, but they wouldn’t accept a Canadian billing address so that didn’t work out. Instead I opted to give PLAY! By Sephora a chance. I was a member for three months before cancelling last week. My reason for ending it was mainly because I barely got any lipsticks or highlighters or anything FUN. I don’t know if it’s because they know that I’m in my mid-thirties or because they just have an influx of specific products, but a bitch doesn’t need twenty sample size cleansers. Not this bitch, anyway. Also, sending out a foundation sample (no matter the luxuriousness of the brand) makes ZERO sense because finding the right shade makes all the difference in the world for foundations. Also, I barely wear foundation. So I ended it. Also, am I the only one who hates getting tiny perfume samples? I feel like I have so many that I feel bad about throwing out, so I just keep them in the washroom and then use them instead of air-freshener if someone (or myself) stinks up the room (#lizadvice).

I was briefly intrigued by Frank & Oak’s clothing subscription box but decided after an hour of research that it’s probably too expensive for what you’re getting, even if the clothes are gorgeous.

Of course it was upsetting to hear that Luke Perry passed away. He was definitely one of the first men that I loved on television (god, I remember every single detail of that 90210 when his wife Rebecca Gayheart was killed). Such a good actor. So wildly attractive. And man, he was one of the best parts of Riverdale. I hate thinking about that show without him.

I absolutely love spring peas, so I made this Lemon-Basil Orzotto and it was really good.

I tried this charcoal that’s supposed to clean your makeup sponge and it was kind of annoying to use. It just takes too long to get a good lathering, and my foaming hand soap does the job much better and quicker.

I’ve only used it once so far, but I think I’m really into this Bliss Jelly Glow Peel Exfoliator that I got at Target for $10. No irritation at all and my face felt crazy smooth afterward.

I have a mini version of Sunday Riley’s Lactic Acid and it’s kind of really good, too. Only a million dollars more expensive than other good facial products! Sweet! Also, you’d think having “acid” in the name would frighten people away but I guess not. Obviously never going to buy the full size because it’s not magical or anything, but happy to have tried it.

Ate at this Mexican place Pulqueria in Chinatown that was pretty good. The location is pretty cool (very NYC out of a movie) and the inside is gorgeous. The food? Pretty decent! All in all, nothing to write home about but definitely worth remembering if you’re in the neighborhood.

Got some ice cream at Taiyaki and it was the definition of plain-as-a-dick. Nothing special here.

Finally ate at Lilia in Brooklyn! Honestly, it was really great and I can’t wait to go back. I made Nathan get the spicy lamb fettuccine so that I could try it and I got the mafaldini with pink peppercorns. His was fantastic, but mine was only so-so (it was way too al dente) - I think I just ordered badly because everything else we had was incredible. They had this herbed focaccia with ramp butter special that blew our faces off. I’ve never heard of a bread special before and it’s a brilliant idea, more restaurants should do this, people go nuts for fancy bread (myself included). The cauliflower appetizer (with spicy soppressata, sicilian pesto & majoram) was amazing and the dessert soft-serve swirl was wild. I already know what I’m ordering next time: the sheeps milk cheese filled agnolotti with saffron, dried tomato & honey. The service was of course great, and the space itself is gorgeous. No idea it used to be an auto-repair shop. Is the pasta better at L’Artusi? I’ll have to order the agnolotti before I answer that question. One must be well informed before making such declarations.

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A post shared by Lilia Ristorante (@lilianewyork) on Mar 4, 2019 at 5:56am PST

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A post shared by Lilia Ristorante (@lilianewyork) on Mar 19, 2019 at 10:38am PDT

On my birthday, I took advantage of a free-facial offered from Smith & Brit in the city and it was beyond lovely. Claire (the owner) is such a fantastic woman who really knows what she’s doing and she made it such a wonderful experience.

I also took advantage of the free birthday brow arch they offer at all Benefit locations and whoa. I almost exclusively thread my eyebrows every few months, so I was excited to have them waxed for a change. I have pretty sensitive forehead skin, so I did have tiny bumps around my eyebrows for a few days afterward, but it still was worth it. They do an “eyebrow map” of how your eyebrows would best look and then wax them accordingly. And then they follow that with filling them in with Benefit products. I usually use a combination of Colourpop’s brow pencil and Milani’s waxier eyebrow pencil, but when she used the Benefit eyebrow gel wand, I was floored at how much fuller they looked. Really considering buying the mini and seeing if I can achieve that same look. Look how full!

Above Photo: Excuse the horrifying closeness of the above photo

I tried both 2019 birthday gifts from Sephora and Ulta, and talked about both of them here.

I watched all of Shrill in one evening and I can’t imagine not watching it that way. It’s perfect. I can’t stop playing this song on repeat, WHY IS IT ONLY ONE MINUTE? Other thoughts: I had no idea that the morning-after pill doesn’t work for women over 175 pounds, that’s insane!? The mother/daughter storyline is so well done it hurts. ALL of the outfits on pretty much every single woman are so fucking lovely. I rewatched that one part with the woman in red walking and buying flowers over and over it just made me so happy, I can’t describe why. And the pool party episode? I may have sobbed through some of it, and not in a sad way but in a cathartic way. It just made me feel so many things at once. Mostly about how sometimes you feel invisible if you’re self conscious or self-loathing about your body, and you feel like you don’t matter unless you fit into this idea of what you think people expect you to look like and how if you don’t fit into that, then you’re essentially a worthless piece of garbage, so you treat yourself that way on a daily basis. And how this type of thinking can last you a lifetime because it’s all you’ve allowed yourself to believe for years and years. There are so many ways that a person can feel inadequate or less than, and it’s so internally normalized because you truly believe that you’re not good enough and you never will be. It’s a depressing way to live and so many women especially live this way, myself included obviously. So that whole episode really just felt like a fucking dream of a reality. I really hope there will be more episodes of the series, I’ve never related to a television show more in my life.

I tried the watermelon makeup wipes from Sephora and even though they smell amazing, they don’t take off all of your makeup. Pass. The Avon one is still my all-time favourite.

I tried the cleansing pads from First Aid Beauty and they’re tingly, fun and great. Perfect alternative for when you don’t feel like washing your face. I don’t know if that’s their intent, but that’s how I’m using them.

Nathan’s second album came out on iTunes! Buy it! Love it! Or not! Do you!

I’ve been having trouble sleeping and one thing that has helped? Taking a hot shower before bed. Is this such common knowledge that I’m a moron? Maybe. In any case, very happy to have learned this.

Started and finished watching the final season of Broad City and it was really, really good. I always forget how good this show is. I wish it existed when I was a teenager.

Practically in LUST with Trader Joe’s Everything But The Bagel Seasoning. I’m so late to this party, but at least I finally got there. I’ve only even tried it on top of some buttered bread and I was floored at how good it is.

Can’t stop rewatching all the old Ready or Not episodes on YouTube. Also, Degrassi Junior High.

You know how sometimes you have irrationally dumb opinions on things you know nothing about? That was me with dry shampoo. I didn’t really understand it. Also, I thought it was exclusively for white women, I don’t know why? Obviously I tried some (this Amika one) and I mean… it’s kind of spectacular. I maybe shouldn’t have discovered it because I might never wash my hair again.

I visited the Everlane store in Soho (because apparently YouTube ads really do work on me) and even though it’s beautifully minimalist, it’s way too overpriced.

Tried the pizza at Lions & Tigers & Squares Detroit Pizza and it was really good. They don’t offer single slices, but it’s the perfect place to go with someone to split one. So in love with Detroit style lately. (Also, can I accept world-wide-credit for the massive amounts of pepperoni pieces you’re seeing on pizzas these days?! I’ve been ordering triple-pepperoni-well-done pizzas for DECADES and I’ve been harshly judged endlessly because of it and LOOK AT WHERE WE ARE NOW! Full credit.)

Above Photo: Pepperoni pizza from Lions & Tigers & Squares, NYC

The penultimate episode of this season of This Is Us was wildly good. There was so much relatable couple stuff, it’s so hard to even get into if you didn’t see the episode/don’t care about the show, but if you did? Email me. I could talk about it for an hour, it was so well done. It’s essentially about the give and take in a relationship and about how it’s rarely equal, and man… so, so well done. Loved every minute.

Remember how I tried and liked Bumble & Bumble’s Thickening Spray? Well, I still do but definitely don’t spray it on your roots, it works much better if you use it sparsely on the rest of your hair when damp. Maybe that’s already obvious but I’m very new to using any hair products, so forgive my stupidity.

SO excited for Jenny Slate’s new book.

I went to Beacon’s Closet for the first time and whoa. I didn’t find anything I loved, but it’s definitely one of those places you should stop in every once in awhile to see what’s there. The space is a little overwhelming, but the things that I’ve seen people get from there are gorgeous and so inexpensive.

I tried to find my colour in the Fenty collection of concealers and nothing matched, but it’s not a huge deal since I’m happy with the NARS one I’ve been using. And speaking of concealers, Colourpop just released their own and they were kind of good?? Again, I still prefer the NARS one, but the Colourpop one is actually kind of good, especially for being $6.

Finally ate at Raclette and I don’t think I’ll be returning. There are basic rules for making a good grilled cheese. I mean, I’m no scientist but you should be able to hold up the sandwich. And that just didn’t happen here. I had to use a knife and fork, which is… sad. Astoria Bier & Cheese understands these rules and still remains the best place to go if you’re in the mood for one.

I accidentally tried smoked salmon for the first time and it was really good, who the hell knew? Apparently everyone but me. I’ve never ordered it because I really only fake-like cooked salmon, so why the hell would I like it uncooked or *shudder* smoked? Also, it looks so gross! I should’ve known better though because it’s almost always true that if something looks gross, it probably tastes amazing. That’s a thing, yeah?

I tried samples (because I own a million fucking samples of every cream on planet earth) of Kiehl’s avocado eye cream and passssssss. It left my under eyes crazy red and zombie-like, so never again.

Bought a new white living room carpet from Carpet Factory Outlet on the Upper East Side and it was so cheap and great, have to keep this place in mind.

Absolutely hate this Tarte mascara, it stays on your lashes for days after you think you’ve washed it off and I don’t know why anyone would want that.

Since I’ll forever love Trader Joe’s, we tried the new broccoli and kale pizza crust and it’s even better than the cauliflower crust that we love. This one also doesn’t burn as easily in the oven as the cauliflower one, so I think this is the new favourite.

There’s a new flavour of banana pudding at Magnolia Bakery: chocolate hazelnut. It was sold out when I tried to get it, but I did get a sample and yikes. Obviously it’s the greatest.

Ate at Al Di La in Brooklyn and it was not fantastic. Their version of “gnocchi” was confusing and 1000% too spinachy. The tagliatelle al ragu (below) was obviously good, but, like, it’s so hard to fuck that up.

Above Photo: Tagliatelle Al Ragu at Al Di La, Brookyn, New York

Found this lovely-as-hell store in Park Slope, Habit. Literally everything felt and looked beautiful. In love with this one specific brand they had.

Went to a Mortified show with Harmeet who was visiting me, and it was good! We only stayed for the first half because honestly my feet hurt and we were standing and I think we both just decided, “Yeah, we get it… we’re good” and then went to Ample Hills Creamery around the corner. Love it when friends decide to leave an event early together for something more fun, not enough people do this.

FINALLY made it to Daily Provisions. Maple cruller? Heavenly. Everything-bagel-flavoured croissant injected with cream cheese? Delightful. Danny Meyer continues to do no wrong. Favourite breakfast place in Union Square.

Above Photo: Maple Cruller from Daily Provisions, Union Square, New York City

Still very much in love with this song, and as I was listening to it one day I started reading the comments as I was listening and this one YouTube comment… my god. So sweet. Maybe parts of it are definitely corny or too much or something, but my god, in the moment, I loved it:

“I heard this song when I woke up un-groggy for the first time after an abortion. It was the first time I heard it. And riding in the car beside my Mom, who had been pro-choice her entire life until the moment she was staring that decision right in the face, both of us were silent the entire song. Through every lyric, it was as if Sara had written a eulogy of my life. Everything we had been through, everything I had suffered. Everything I had seen. Every time I had to grow up sooner than I should have. Everything I had to push to the back of my mind so I didn’t lose myself completely. Everything surfaced through these lyrics. This will just be another comment lost among this thread. But if someone happens to read it - if someone who NEEDS to see this comment see’s it - know that things will always be better. TIME HEALS ALL. Even if it seems as though no one would care if you were gone. Even if it seems as though you have no purpose in this world. YOU MATTER. It doesn’t matter how many mistakes you have made. It doesn’t matter how many times you have sworn to God “you’d change” if he just forgave you for this one mistake. Hell. Even if you don’t believe in God. If you don’t know what to believe, if you’re lost, if you don’t know what to do - just keep going. Keep doing. Keep moving in any direction that is away from the heartache and pain that keeps you tied down. Let go of the past. Let go of the fear and hurt your heart endures on a daily basis. Just keep living. Keep going. Forgive. Never forget. Learn from your mistakes. Better yourself. Live for you. Find your happiness. Love unconditionally. Live.” — Shelby Grimm

Went to Momofuku Noodle Bar for the second time and it was so much better than the first time. I also ordered better. The chilled spicy noodles with sichuan sausage, thai basil & cashews (shown below) were incredible and I tried some of the broth of the spicy beef ramen that Harmeet ordered and holy shit, it was good. I’m still too… not into the idea of ramen, but that broth was fucking nuts. ALSO, their dessert special (caramelized white chocolate pie with hazelnut and puffed rice was F-U-C-K-I-N-G memorable (also below). Christ.

Above Photo: Chilled Spicy Noodles from Momofuku Noodle Bar, NYC

Above Photo: Caramelized White Chocolate Pie from Momofuku Noodle Bar, NYC

A few months ago I got dinner at Pil Pil on the Upper East Side and since it was good, I stopped in there for lunch recently and it’s probably the best lunch I’ve had in that area for sure. There’s a $4 happy hour sangria special and their lamb sliders are incredible. The fries are maybe my favourite restaurant fries in the city, they’re so crispy and drizzled with this spicy aioli and they also have a chocolate-hazelnut dessert cake that is unbelievable. I know it sounds like I love everything everywhere, but I swear I don’t.

There is a place in NYC where you can rent out really nice digital cameras for 24 hours FOR FREE and no one knows about it (the only hiccup is that you need to have state-issued ID). Sony Square is a “public space committed to showcasing innovations in products, music, movies and gaming” - which essentially means that every few weeks they change up their aesthetic to showcase new Sony products, but the camera-rental service is an always-available option. Insanely cool thing to offer.

Found amazingly soft and comfortable leggings (cheap too!) at Aerie (thank you Marla!) that I will exclusively buy from now on. (No more trash Aritzia leggings that disintegrate every three months!) Bought some of their workout pants too that have pockets (!) that were incredibly soft, too.

I saw the movie Us and really liked it. Mostly because yeah, it’s a good movie. But also because IT’S AN ORIGINAL MOVIE. I’m so sick of remakes and superhero movies that I love it when movies like this get made. I know it’s classified as a horror movie, but it’s not really, in my opinion. Plus I love when you finish watching a movie and you want to come home immediately and research as much about it as possible. It’s good, go see it!

Harmeet and I went to Manhatta for lunch (because apparently I have a Danny Meyer obsession) and it exceeded all expectations. First of all, it’s not crazy expensive despite the fact that it’s in the fucking sky (60th floor). We got the mushroom soup, the scotch snails with pork sausage in garlic butter and the French onion burger and everything was amazing. Service was perfect. Views are insane. Perfect place to take someone who’s visiting, especially for lunch. Will definitely go back.

Above Photo: View from Manhatta, NYC

Above Photo: Harmeet! In all her beauty!

Above Photo: French Onion Burger from Manhatta, NYC

Lastly, I watched the Leaving Neverland documentary on HBO. I also watched all the episodes of Surviving R. Kelly. I watched both of these within a few days and I don’t recommend anyone viewing all of these things in such a short amount of time unless you want to cry endlessly and (irrationally? Or understandably?) loathe an entire gender for a few days. And look, if you know anything about me, you know what a huge fan I am of Michael Jackson. From his music to the connection of meeting Nathan, I’ve forever loved this man in the way that all of his fans love him. For years I would think (and sometimes, ugh, say) “I don’t know that man personally. I don’t want to know about his personal life. I can’t judge him if I don’t know him.” And I’d say these things as a way of deflecting from the fact that I didn’t want those beautiful songs tarnished in my mind, as dumb as that sounds. And in an extremely similar way, I acted the same with R. Kelly. I didn’t WANT to take “When A Woman Loves” off of my iPod for years because I didn’t want to believe someone who could sing so beautifully could be some kind of monster, which makes zero sense but seems like a rational thought to people who still don’t believe these victims. The way that we worship these artists/abusers, without actually knowing anything about them (or sometimes knowing complete details of their abuse), wanting them to continue to achieve success no matter what the cost, is so unhealthy and odd and is part of a larger culture that is already designed to idolize anyone with status or more money than us. I didn’t want to watch Neverland. I knew it’d be bad. I only took down my Woody Allen poster in my childhood bedroom last year (to be fair, I don’t live there, but this should’ve happened years ago). I rarely spoke up in favor of these men, but I did stay silent when they were discussed because that was easier to do and basically what most everyone else was doing and made it feel acceptable, which is awful. I feel horrible that it took this many years for victims to be believed and it makes me sick that I’m apart of the group of people who made it impossible for victims to be heard. As hard as these things were to watch, I think they’re wildly important to see.

This one part from Surviving R. Kelly sums up one of the problems so well.

“Our society tends to compartmentalize the things we don’t want to look at, and magnifies and glorifies the things that we do. For example, if an individual is providing something to the society as music, cinema, politics - we’re more likely to compartmentalize the negative behavior and minimize it, as a way of accepting what they’re contributing.”

Jesus, a lot happened in March. Excited for April! Some upcoming things that you can expect in next month’s post: I’m going to start taking collagen (I’ve heard it helps hair growth), a family trip to Niagara Falls, a Best of Astoria post & thoughts on the new Twilight Zone. Hello, April!

[diegodog2002]

Arrested, naked in jail   Part II

My name is Jack Woodward. I am the guy who was arrested by the cop in the park for littering and indecent exposure.  My boyfriend is Derrick Welles.  He is the gorgeous Thom of Finland looking motorcycle rider who fucked me in jail, and brought me home.   After my jail experience, Derrick and I got to know each other.  We found we had a lot in common.  One of the kinkier things we had in common was or love of wearing embarrassing underwear, and seeing if one of us could expose the other wearing them.  We had fun being in a restaurant and before leaving after we ate, one of us would inevitably grab the back pocket of the others pants, and RRRIIIP, tear the pocket down to the knees of the victim. This would give everyone in the restaurant a great view of the others embarrassing briefs.  Sometimes Derrick would wear a pair of briefs that were totally outrageous.  Perhaps they would be polka dotted, or even look like a pair of boys briefs with cartoon images like ‘Scooby-Doo’ all over them.  I think his most embarrassing briefs is the pair that had ‘My Little Pony’ images all over them.  Where he found those briefs, I have no idea.  Me on the other hand, I like to wear briefs that were made from sheer or shiny fabrics, and they too would be on the embarrassing side.  Especially the time I wore a pair of sheer white nylon briefs that said ‘Hungry Bottom’ across the arse.   That evening when Derrick went to rip the back of my pants open, he got a bit carried away, and the back of my pants ripped apart and fell to the floor, exposing my ‘Hungry Bottom’ to the whole restaurant.  Needless to say I was mortified.  Whoever was exposed first, was then forced to get ice cream, or some other dessert from a takeout shop, with his underwear exposed.  By the time we got home, we were both so horny, we could not wait to get into the house and get the rest of our clothes off.  

Derrick and I talked a lot about our arrest.  We found out that our arresting cop was Officer Rod Stanton.  We were able to find out that he was one of those gung ho type cops who wanted to arrest everyone, no matter how minor their offence was.  He personally arrested Derrick a few more times after our jail incident.  The charges were always insignificant ones that would never hold up in a court of law, and ended up being dismissed by Stanton’s superiors.

We both had enough of Rod’s antics, and decided it was time for us to take him down a few pegs, and bring him back to reality.  We began by checking out officer Rod’s work schedule.  We found out he worked a Monday through Friday schedule, and he was always on the day shift.  Once we got his schedule we followed him a few times to see where he lived, and what his routine was.  Turns out, Rod was single, and was a very predictable fellow.  Every morning he left his house at exactly 4:30 AM and went to the gym.  He got to the gym at 5:00 AM without fail.  He left the gym at 7:00 AM.  He would be wearing the same clothing as when he entered the gym.  A pair of sweatpants and a tee shirt.  He arrived at his police precinct at 7:45 AM.  When he got out of his car, he always had his clean uniform hanging up in the back seat of his car.  He would put his uniform on while at the precinct and start his day at 8:00 AM.

The best thing about getting to know Rod’s schedule was that when he last arrested Derrick, Derrick gave Rod a little stuffed animal.  It was a pig dressed in a cop’s uniform.  Hidden inside the pig was a motion activated camera, and a microphone.  We had hoped Rod would take it home and we would be able to watch his evening habits while at home.  Rod did not take the pig home.  He put it in his work locker.  Whenever Rod opened the door of his locker, it activated the pig, and we were able to watch Rod change out of his sweat pants and into his police uniform, and we could hear his conversations.  Every day was the same routine at the lockers.  Rod would strip out of his tee shirt and sweatpants.  He would carefully fold them up and put them in the bottom of his locker.  Rod’s underwear was as routine as he was.  He always wore white Fruit of the Loom brand boxer briefs.  Not the fashion type of boxer briefs, but the kind that had the briefs style fly on them, and long legs.  When he finished his workout, Rod would shower and put his boxer briefs and his sweats back on.  

It was now time to humiliate our friend Officer Rod Stanton.  Derrick and I had every step of our plan detailed and worked out to the second. It was to our advantage that Derrick has a bit of a shady and unscrupulous past.  He has many friends who were able to help us out, and teach us things we needed to know in order for our caper to work.   Our first step was to follow Rod from his house to his gym.  As usual, Rod locked his car in the parking lot of the gym.  He always parked in the same spot every day.  After he was in the gym, Derrick and I were able to pick the lock on his car.  We learned this skill from one of Derrick’s friends.  We had to be careful, as we did not want to set off the car alarm.  Once we unlocked the car, we took Rod’s uniform out of the back seat.   We had obtained some slow working corrosive solution that over a period of about six hours would totally dissolve all the threads of his uniform thus causing his uniform to fall apart while he was wearing it.  The timing of this was crucial.  We wanted Rod to be around a lot of people when his uniform fell apart.   Once we had the solution on his uniform, we carefully rehung it on the hanger and then hung it in the back seat of his car. We locked his car back up and went into the gym.   As usual at this early hour of the morning, there were very few people in the gym.  Rod was friends with the few guys who worked out at this gym at that hour of the morning.  The gym was a men’s only gym.  This alone led us to be suspicious of Officer Rod.  

After Rod had completed his workout, he took his shower like he always did.  This was where our timing had to be critical.  While he was in the shower, Derrick and I had to unlock his locker, and steal his gym clothing, his jockstrap, and his underwear.   One of Derrick’ “friends” taught me how to open a typical gym locker.  He told me they were all the same, and breaking into one was easy.  It took me a lot of practice, but I finally learned how to do it.  Derrick was my lookout.  As soon as Rod was in the shower, I started my job of cracking the gym locker.  I had exactly eight minutes in which to open the locker, remove his belongings, replace them with our items, and re-lock his locker.  I was as nervous as could be.  I hoped I would not get caught by anyone, and have enough time to complete my task.  It took a few tries before I got the locker unlocked.  Once I did, I removed Rod’s things and replaced them with ours.  Derrick was signaling for me to hurry up because Rod had finished his shower and was drying off.  Somehow I managed to get everything done in my allotted time period.  Derrick and I rushed out and hid behind some lockers at the other end of the locker room.   “What the fuck is this?”  Rod shouted.   There was no one there to answer his query. The other guys who Rod associated with had already left the gym.  We watched them leave the gym before we went in.   “Who the fuck took my workout clothes and left me this shit?”  Rod shouted again.   “Goddamned mother fuckers.  I’ll get even with those guys.  I thought you were my friends!”  Rod mumbled.   Derrick and I quickly left the gym.  Our timing was great.  No one saw us leave with Rod’s clothing in our hands.  We rushed home so we could watch Rod change his clothes at the police station and see if phase two of our plan worked.   We got home in time to watch the pig camera start up just as Rod opened his work locker.  He kept looking around.  It was obvious he was waiting for the locker room to empty out before he stripped out of his sweats.  He finally took off his tee shirt, and began removing his sweatpants.  We were not sure what we were going to see when Rod removed his sweatpants.  As he slid them off, he revealed he was wearing a pair of red sheer lace panties. We could see Rod was trying to cover himself up as he removed his sweatpants.  There was no hiding this pair of underwear.  They were bright red. Rod looked around and began to play with himself.  It was evident that he was enjoying the feeling of the red lace panties.  Rod stopped when voices were heard in the background.  Just as Rod was pulling up his uniform pants, a voice in the distance was heard.   “Nice underwear!”  The voice said.  “I see you decided to spice up your life a bit and get rid of your usual underwear. I will bet all the boys like them! Hey guys, come here and get a look at Rod’s new under fashion!” “Shut the fuck up!  My supposed friends at the gym played a gag on me and took my underwear.  They left only these.”  Rod fired back.   “Yeah sure, OK, whatever you say.”  The voice said.   Before the other officers could rally around, Rod had pulled up his uniform pants and was putting his shirt on.  He stuffed his shirt into his pants without unbuckling them.   Derrick and I laughed while watching the video feed.  We made sure to record the event for our future enjoyment.  

Now it was time for the final part of Rod’s embarrassment.   Derrick and I put on some disguises so that Officer Rod would not recognize us.  We each put on a shaggy unkempt wig, dark glasses and some oversized rumpled clothing.   Once a week on this day, Officer Rod would go to a meeting of Sexaholics Anonymous.  Not as a group member, but as an officer of the law and speaker.  He would inform the meeting members how to try and overcome their problem and make it one of their twelve steps. As Officer Rod was beginning his talk, Derrick nudged me, and pointed to my shoulder.  I looked at Officer Rod.  I could see that his shirt seam was beginning to tear.  He had no idea of this and continued his talk.  Since Rod was not standing behind a desk or podium, the audience was able to see what was happening.  He wanted to make a specific point.  He went to the board behind him and grabbed a marker to write with.  When he reached for the marker, he dropped it on the floor.  With his back to the audience he bent down to pick it up.  When he did the back of his uniform pants split apart.  No sound was heard, but the butt seam of his pants burst apart, exposing his red sheer lace panties.  Rod had no idea his pants had torn open.  There was a roar of laughter from the meeting group.  When Rod stood up and turned around, he asked what was so funny.  Someone in the audience said that someone had just told a funny joke.   Rod returned to the board to write the specific point he was going to make.  Just as he raised his arm to begin writing, his shirt completely fell apart. It was still tucked into his pants, and that was all that was holding his shirt to his body.   “What the f…!”  Was all Rod was able to get out.   As if it was a normal reaction, Rod pulled the remains of his shirt off and tossed them to the floor.  Even before his shirt hit the floor the rest of his pants fell apart.  His pants looked like they were peeling away.  It began at the seam just under his waist band, and fell forward.  The weight of the fabric only helped in tearing his pants off him.  The seams of the front and back of his pants both fell apart at the same time.  It happened in only a few seconds, but there was Officer Rod, standing in front of everyone in just a pair of red lace see through panties.  Of course since he was in front of a group from Sexaholics Anonymous, they let out hoots and hollers wanting more.  Officer Rod was as red faced as his panties.  He ran to the door to get out of there.  However, as an added bonus to his embarrassment, his lace panties started to dissolve.  It seems that the chemical used on Officer Rod’s clothing had somehow been absorbed by his lace panties, perhaps from his perspiration.  Before Rod was at the door to exit, the front panel of his panties began dissolving.  He gave everyone in Sexaholics Anonymous a good view of his circumcised hairy cock and balls.  Somehow, as Rod opened the door to exit, he managed to catch the side of his panties onto the door latch.  As he ran out, whatever remained of his panties were wrenched off his body.  He now gave everyone the full moon shot!  Sexaholics Anonymous was in an uproar.  Everyone was asking if this was planned.  

While everyone was laughing, Derrick and I slipped out.  We were also laughing.  Before we left the building where the meeting was, we made the mistake of removing our disguises.   We heard Rod yelling.  “You BASTARDS!  I will get you for this!” Derrick and I started to run, but Rod was right on our heels.  Before we got a few steps, Rod grabbed hold of me.  He got me by the rear pocket of my disguise pants.  RRRIIIP.  He tore the back of my pants apart, exposing me wearing a pair of leopard print bikini briefs.   Rod tackled me.  Derrick was ahead of me, and heard me as I fell to the floor. Derrick pushed Rod off me, and to our surprise, Rod’s rod was erect.  He tried to cover himself up, but it was too late.  We had seen him.  Derrick was the first to say anything.   “You enjoyed this!”  Derrick said.   “No, you guys totally humiliated me!” Rod barked back.   “Yeah we humiliated you, but you liked being humiliated, and you liked being on top of Jack !  You want to have sex with him!”  Derrick responded.   “I was right!”  Derrick said to me.  “He is gay!” Rod started to get up while trying to keep himself covered up.   “No, no I am not gay!  I will get you for this so help me!’  Rod shouted.   “No you won’t!”  I replied.  “If you ever try to retaliate for this, I will make sure everyone sees you wearing your little panties and playing with yourself.  We will make sure everyone knows you are gay!” “How did you know I was playing with myself?” Rod sheepishly asked.   “We have video and pictures.  You leave us and Derrick’s motorcycle friends alone, and no one else will ever hear about this incident.  If anyone says they saw you, you can deny it.  But if you cross us, I will make sure everyone sees the video!” I stated.   “Agreed.”  Rod said.   Derrick and I left officer Rod there naked. How he got out of the building we have no idea.   All I can say is that before we got to our car, the back of my pants were torn off, totally exposing my leopard print bikini briefs.  I had to buy the ice cream today!

[nancyswhlr]

a prompt! : jancy & spontaneous slow-dancing. love your writing, you're really talented

a big thanks to my lovely friend javie, @jvncys , for helping me find a song & also for requesting the same prompt actually! + ao3 link

It was the type of summer night that was hot, no doubt, but not that bad. Not sticky and humid and slick with sweat hot they’d been used to for the past couple weeks now. Sometimes even a slight breeze peeled through the air, indulging them for a second.

And, surprisingly, it wasn’t that bad during the day either. It was still uncomfortably warm, but not sticky enough to deter them. Nancy had still managed to wear the sundress she, and her boyfriend, loved so much. Even Jonathan had shown up to her house in shorts. And the car ride to the movies was comfortable with all the windows down and Jonathan going fast enough for it to matter. The AC was still broken in his ford, but Hopper promised the next day off he’d help fix it.

They hadn’t eaten before the movie, simply for lack of time. They were ten minutes late as is, but Nancy still insisted it’d be fine. When they exited the theater, hand in hand, the sun had already set and Hawkins was engulfed in darkness only speckled with streetlights.

The responsible thing would be to eat dinner, neither had eaten real food since lunch, but it was hot and Nancy was craving something sweet so without even thinking she led their conjoined hands to the ice cream shop in the center of town. It was surprisingly quiet, and she recalled Steve saying something about a bonfire at the lake tonight. Good, Nancy thought to herself. No one to bother them. They slipped in the shop, the bell announcing their arrival to the sweet old lady working behind the counter.

She ignored Jonathan’s look when she ordered cookie dough in a cup (she liked cones too, but they were harder to share), about to take out her own wallet before he could hand a bill to the lady. She managed to give him a pointed look when he did just that, knowing how much it irked her. She didn’t have a problem with her boyfriend buying her things sometimes, but he had bought the movie tickets. And he was the one with the job, the money supposed to be going towards his college savings. And his family was the one struggling financially, especially compared to hers.

She thought the least her father could do was pay for her and her boyfriend to get dessert for dinner. “I’m giving you gas money.” She announced as they walked out the back door, leading them to the picnic tables in the back of the shop.

“You don’t-” Jonathan started, but was cut off with one daring look. Finish that sentence. “Thank you.” He changed his mind instead, laughing at her pleased look.

The night was clear, and how warm it was still made the frozen desert even better Nancy decided. She could feel Jonathan’s eyes on her, questioning. She gave him a look instead, her mouth filled with ice cream otherwise she’d ask.

Jonathan shrugged. “I know strawberry is your favorite, that’s all.”

There it was. Nancy grinned, making a scoop full of ice cream as she spoke. “Yeah, well my thought process was maybe if I got your favorite, maybe you’d actually eat some of it.” She laughed, pushing the ice cream up to his mouth before he could respond to that.

That was Nancy’s relationship with Jonathan for a lot of things. He did so much for her, she loved doing little things to make him happy. Of course she’d order his favorite ice cream because he would always order hers. She’d make sure he had gas money since he was driving her everywhere. She’d show up at his job with lunch on days he otherwise wouldn’t eat until dinner. It was just what she did. She didn’t mind looking out for Jonathan, it’s not like anyone else was going to put him first. In fact, she kind of loved it.

“You didn’t have to.” Jonathan was saying as he swallowed. She wanted to roll her eyes. She knew she didn’t have to, she wanted to.

Nancy shrugged. “I happen to like cookie dough just as much, thank you.”

Jonathan only laughed as Nancy sat, making herself comfortable on the top of the picnic table. Her feet rested on the seat, and she straightened out her skirt over her knees before force feeding Jonathan another bite.

He took it gladly as he sat next to her, resting his elbows on his knees as he did so. It was still unbearably hot, but neither one of them wanted the distance. They just missed the AC from the movie theater or even the inside of the store.

“Do you really?” He wondered, causing Nancy to raise an eyebrow as she licked the remaining ice cream off the spoon. “Actually like cookie dough?”

He laughed as she did. “It’s good. Not my favorite, but it’s good. Plus,” She scooted even closer, “I like you. So…” She shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“I like you, too. So much.” Jonathan replied immediately, his voice getting all serious. He always spoke seriously when it came to her, and his feelings about her. It was never a joke.

“I know.” Nancy replied, not even being able to stop the blush crawling up her neck and cheeks. She ducked her head, focusing her eyes on her sneakers in hopes to hide it.

She did know, boy did she know. He made no effort to hide that in the last few months they’d started dating. In fact, she felt more in love, and loved, than she had ever with her ex. She was sure he knew it too.

Jonathan’s fingers reached out to brush her own, and she let herself meet his eye again. He, surprisingly, just looked away from her. Unsurprisingly though, he also had a slight redness to his face. But he was looking up instead, almost thoughtfully. She paused for a moment to see what his eye caught.

“Really?” She teased him, looking to the speaker. The music was low, but it was unmistakable. She could now only hear Heaven by Bryan Adams playing as they sat.

“What?” He laughed back, his eyes focusing on their hands now. “It’s a good song.” She knew he was saying that because it happened to remind him of her. It’s okay, she felt the same.

“Yeah, it’s a good song. Very romantic.”

“It can be romantic.” Jonathan shrugged.

And then, all of the sudden, Jonathan hopped off the table and was around her. She wasn’t sure when he moved their hands, but now both of his were on either side of her on the picnic table top. Supporting his weight as he had stood, and Nancy felt her breathe hitch at how close he was.

She forced herself to meet his eyes, and not his lips, as he spoke. “You just have to make it romantic.” He all but whispered before he was leaning in, brushing his lips against hers.

Nancy pushed herself forward, fully, capturing his lips with her own as she brought her hands to his neck. His lips were sticky and tasted sweet like the vanilla ice cream that was now forgotten about behind them as she deepened the kiss. Jonathan made no movement of stopping her as he, somehow, pushed himself closer to her on the table. It suddenly occurred to her without that bench part, she could wrap her legs around him without a barrier, and she wished that was a reality now.

Maybe not the best idea in a public place, she was made aware when they broke away to take a breath. She didn’t let him move though, as she rested her hands on his broad shoulders, letting herself steady as she looked up at him from under her lashes.

It was a feeble attempt because the sight of his eyes blown wide and the look he was giving her was enough to make her feel like she was pushed out of a plane. She wanted more of him, but she also didn’t want to fuck him behind an ice cream shop in the middle of town.

She could only imagine what the rumors would say. Oh god, and her mother. At least Mrs. Byers, or Joyce as Nancy was told to call her, would find it funny. Hell, Hop probably would too.

Slowly, as slowly as she could, she pushed herself a couple inches away from him. He had the same idea, thankfully, knowing they’d need to hit the brakes before this went too far. She was still looking up at him, breathlessly, when she spoke.

“You kissing me isn’t what makes this song so romantic.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.” She hummed, her tone taking a playful teasing one once again. She nearly even cocked her head to the side.

“That’s all I got then. What would you like?” He wondered, still trapping her between his arms on either side. She tried to ignore how hot that was.

“I-I don’t know.” She shrugged, thoughts leaving her for a second. “A gesture. Like…”

Jonathan only raised his eyebrows at her, begging her to explain. She must have got it because she got that look in her eyes Jonathan knew all too well. Her I have a plan and nothing is going to stop me look.

Before he could even ask, she was gently pushing him away from her, her hands still on his shoulders as she stood on the ground. She was still a couple inches shorter than him, but it was manageable to wrap her arms around his neck as she pushed them back, just a little more.

And then, she started to sway. Her eyes never left him, and Jonathan felt himself getting embarrassed and blushing again as he tentatively lifted his hands to her waist. Fuck, he was never really good at this.

But he wasn’t too bad. Certainly not as bad as he thought he was. Even though she knew Mrs. Byers’ had given Will the lessons though. Nancy lessened the distance between them, dancing only somewhat awkwardly. Gently, she took his arms and placed them tighter around herself.

He’d been nervous the first time they’d done this at prom too, but even then he got the hang of it quickly. She was also nearly supporting all her weight on him then, her feet hurt from the heels and she was just a little buzzed from the punch Steve spiked. They skipped out early but Nancy had a great time with him. She only insisted they danced a little before they went to make out in his car or something.

“There you go,” Nancy smirked in approval as Jonathan matched her movements, although she could tell he was embarrassed to be doing this so openly. Although, he’d probably be all red in the face if they were in his room too.

“This is your idea of romantic?” He laughed, although it was softly now. It was almost too intimate of a moment to speak at a normal volume.

Nancy nodded, leaning her head against him now. “Well, yeah. This is nice isn’t it?”

“Yeah, yeah it is.” Jonathan answered quickly, almost too quickly, and it brought a smile to his girlfriend’s face.

“I think so too.” She mumbled, snuggling against him as the rest of the song played out. She didn’t fail to notice Jonathan’s arms also tighten around her, the degree she had wanted when he first touched her, and she felt completely comfortable in his embrace.

Nevermind the stupidly hot Indiana summer, or the fact their body heat would cause this to be uncomfortable and sweaty if they kept it up. Jonathan could drive them down the freeway to make up for that later, having a feeling neither one planned on calling it early tonight. Right now, also all the time but especially right now, she just wanted to be close to him.

And when the song ended, Nancy started to pull away as something else came on. She didn’t recognize it, and could only assume Jonathan didn’t either, but his grip didn’t loosen. Instead, he reached for one of her hands while his other stayed firm around her.

And he was grinning, all red and bashful, but smiling from ear to ear. It was contagious, and even though she was already hot and missing her ice cream, she let a smile spread across her face too as she humored him.

“Sorry. I know I suck at this, don’t I?”

“Kinda.” Nancy stated bluntly. “It’s okay though,” She quickly took her other hand to lift his chin, forcing him to meet her eye. “Think of how good you’ll be at prom next year.”

He was touched for a moment, or maybe stunned. They’d been together nearly eight months now, ever since one of the worst weeks of his life (although November ‘83 was a tie) but he was almost floored at how sure she was. She wanted him in her life, now and in the future. She wanted him as much as he wanted her, and he could hardly believe that. He looked like he was about to scoop her up and kiss her again, and Nancy wanted nothing more than for him to do just that.

Instead, he laughed, the touched look never leaving his eyes. He didn’t have to say anything, she knew how much it meant to him. “How am I gonna be better when I don’t even know what I’m doing now?”

“You practice!” Nancy exclaimed like it was the simplest thing in the world. In an instant, she was leading him as they danced, both of them laughing and messing up. Jonathan hand one hand enclosed with hers against his chest, trying to keep up while the other was still wrapped around her. In a rather bold move, Jonathan took the chance to spin her.

Nancy’s dress swirled around her, and her sneakers were not meant to gracefully turn under cement, but she was laughing anyway. She landed against his chest, still looking up at him under her lashes. They were both genuinely happy and that was a rarity for both of them. Especially in the last year.

Well, the last couple months had been pretty great. So maybe happiness was more becoming to them than she thought. Maybe they really deserved it too. She certainly wasn’t grateful for anything that happened, but she was grateful for him.

Nancy moved first as she backed herself a bit to look him in the eyes. Jonathan was sporting one of those smiles he only gave her and she felt her heart hammer in her chest. It was overwhelming, what she felt for this boy. 

“I love you.” She breathed.

She never felt more sure about anything in her life, and she wanted him to know that.

Nancy felt weak in her knees by just the way Jonathan was looking at her. “I love you too, so much.”

Nancy was grinning when she pushed herself back up again, and they stayed like that for another few moments. All swaying and kisses that were messy and improper because they were grinning through them.

They broke away for air once again, but neither moved for a minute. Until Jonathan was talking again after the silence, pressing another soft kiss on her lips as he spoke. “By the way, I think your ice cream has melted by now.”

Nancy was out of his arms in a moment, although not releasing his hand. “Shit!” She grinned, dragging him back to the picnic table to find a cold soupy mess. “Our ice cream has melted.” She corrected, taking a spoonful anyways. It was still good.

“Our icecr-” Jonathan corrected himself, walking up behind her. Before he could finish though, Nancy had turned on her heel, pressed nearly chest to chest with him, as she shoved the spoon full of ice cream into his mouth again.

[canaryatlaw]

okay. another long and mostly good day. The vast majority of it was good but I got slightly peeved at my family and of course particularly at my asshole (older) brother, but whatever. Jess’ alarm went off at 8, and we started getting dressed. I was doing my Ramona Flowers cosplay today, and I was pretty sure I was going to melt because the outfit was legit a hoodie and then another jacket over that, but I did my best to find ones that were described as lightweight. I was doing normal make up today so I ddi that and then we headed out. My house perpetually never has breakfast food, so we stopped at McDonalds for food and coffee, and then we were on our way. The ride there and back went pretty smoothly both days, nothing really crazy that would be an issue. We got there right around 10 when it opened, and there was quite a line to get past security and inside, so we had to wait outside and I was doing my best not to totally overheat lol. I set the metal detector off at the juvenile courthouse so many times that now whenever I walk through one and don’t set it off, it feels like an accomplishment honestly 😂 but we got in, Brandon wasn’t out yet so we browsed for a while mostly looking at funko pops, Jess wanted the ATOM of course and I was casually looking for Ramona since I know they have one and that would be cool to have. I’m also going to buy the Elektra from Daredevil pop at some point, just haven’t gotten around to it yet (and my stack of dark haired women that can kick your ass funko pops is getting quite tall lately). We also went back to the t-shirt place from yesterday and browsed for a bit, I resisted the temptation to buy more wonder woman shirts, partially because they were just in unisex sizes that I don’t like how they fit me. But I did get the “Nelson and Murdock: attorneys at law” shirt I wanted so that made me happy. It reminds me of my first year legal writing class which is all graded anonymously through your student ID number so our prof said we could make up a name to actually sign it with, and I ended up putting “Sara Lance, Assassins at Law” as opposed to attorneys at law and I felt very clever lol. I’m pretty sure I put the address as like 123 Comingforyou drive too. Good times. So then we made our way back to Brandon’s table as he had arrived, so we were good and waited in line, then talked to him of course, he noticed and complimented my cosplay immediately, a lot of people actually told me they liked it which I was pleased to hear because she has a lot of different outfits in the movie and it’s not like you’re gonna memorize every one, but I’m sure the wig with the rather distinctive larger pieces in the front helped. So we chatted with him and took some selfies, which thankfully look better than the ones from yesterday that were god awful. I told him I wanted to do a fighting photo op pose, so we were prepared for that. The photo op wasn’t till 1:30 though and we didn't have much else to be, and Brandon was kinda swamped so we couldn’t really just chill with him. So we walked around a bit more then ended up sitting in front of their main panel stage, and happened to watch the kids costume contest, which was sooooooo adorable, so many precious children. the one who takes the kid though was definitely this little boy who dressed as a transformer, with like, incredible detail and care, but the kicker is when he lays down HE CAN ACTUALLY TRANSFORM INTO A TRUCK and if that’s not the coolest idea ever I don’t know what is. So, unsurprisingly, he won, got some sort of star wars land speeder things, idk. That started at 12 and we wanted to be at the photo op at like 1 because they tended to start early. Brandon wasn’t at his table, so we talked to his handlers for a bit, who are both super nice and like, actual friends with Jess now lol, so we did that before going to the photo op, and unsurprisingly they started like 20 minutes before the scheduled time. We were sent to wait behind the photo set up and I’m standing there waiting and this guy in a fucking spider-man costume just like, walks past me and places himself on line and I really, really wanted to be like “hey asswipe, do you actually know how not to be a fucking moron??” but the small amount of common sense I do have decided that it wasn’t worth it so I just glared at him periodically. When I got into the photo op we kind of figured out our pose and then took the photo, and it came out super good, I’ll grab it and post it on here in a minute (well, when I’m done here). Once we had the photo we went back over to the table and shamelessly cut the line (wow I’m a hypocrite but like we have street cred here we can do that) to show Brandon the photo op, and he of course signed it without me even asking, and wrote a very funny message about the two characters, so that made me happy. Having done the rounds a lot and not really having much else to do we decided to say goodbye and head out, Brandon was leaving at 3 anyway so he could get back to Courtney and their son for Father’s Day (awwwwww). Saying goodbye is always hard and like, it’s hard to say when we might see him again since not a whole lot of stuff has been announced so far. I definitely did miss Courtney being there too. But anyway, we headed out and decided we needed some lunch, so I decided Jess needed to try authentic New York pizza (on the hierarchy of NY foods non-Yankees need to try while here is like 1) bagels 2) pizza 3) either carvel or friendly’s, 4) kosher delis 5) diners, and 6) normal delis). so I just googled mapped the nearest pizzeria and went there, because I know we can get fab pizza at any place there, and it was very fab! I love getting pizza whenever I’m here, so it was really a must. Jess very much enjoyed hers, even if she continues to talk about how Chicago deep dish is better, but I’m quite aware that’s more to antagonize me than an actual opinion at this point 😂 when we were walking out she was yelling like “DEEP DISH IS BETTER!!!” and I was like “careful, you can get shot for saying stuff like that here” and this random guy who was walking away from his car was like “I’ll get the gun” and we both basically died laughing. Drive home was fine, hit a bit of traffic but nothing bad. When we were right about to pass a Carvel I had the bright idea to ask if Jess wanted ice cream (because I always want ice cream, of course) and she said heck yeah so we pulled into the place. I got my favorite vanilla soft serve with chocolate crunches on the outside and in a waffle cone, Jess ended up order a combination of their three different types of sherbet that they made especially for her 😂 it was also funny because we were chatting a little with this lady standing next to us, whom we discovered was also from Chicago and was here visiting, lol. so that was good. Carvel doesn’t have a seating area or anything, so we just went back to the car to eat them, and damn, they tasted so good, but it took sooo long to finish them (and that was the “small” version), When we did finish I drove the rest of the way home, things were a bit busy with everyone prepping for father’s day dinner, one of our family friends was over and in charge of the steaks, so there was all that. We basically just chilled in my room until we got called for dinner, which was being held outside at the table on the patio, which is always nice. Dinner was pretty good, things were pretty solid, We broke before dessert and then rejoined a bit later, and while dessert was very lovely my asshole older brother started making asshole comments and like....objectively it was nothing, I know it was nothing, but it just makes me so damn mad when he says does things like laughing at me and then saying “oh please, Rachel would be a terrible lawyer for (specific area of law” and I really just wanted to get up and punch him and like.....I hate this so much because I so want to be at a point where stupid little things like that don’t get under my skin, but honestly the stupidest little jerk comments just trigger all these emotions in me because this, and much, much worse, happened for so many years, and when he does it now it’s like I’m right back there, living a life I desperately wanted to get out of any way possible- any way at all. Of course it only got worse from there, because we were talking about job shit and my parents were pulling more of this “well you’re just going to come to New York even though you’ve told us like 12 times on this trip that you want to stay in Illinois” and just like the fact that they really don’t seem to give a damn about how I feel about major decisions in my life and that’s really infuriating. And then of course the friend of my father’s came up in conversation and it was the guy who posted the creepy comment about “smiling” on my facebook photo and I said so, and then of course nobody took me serious at all, they’re all laughing and making fun of me for even being creeped out about this and it was surely not what he intended, and I mean, of course I held back that like 10 years ago when I was 16 he messaged me late at night a few times and asked me creepy invasive questions, so one damn comment of “smile” (which is bad enough tbh) meant a whole lot more than that. So I was kinda pissed over them still refusing to take anything I feel into account, they just laugh every time I get upset and mad and I really just want to fucking punch them and be told my feelings are valid for once in my fucking life, for fucking ONCE for one of them to be sorry for something they did to me, fucking tortured me, and the word “sorry” never came to their lips about it, and they think they never did anything wrong, and if I tried to bring it up I would only be mocked and shit on more, and I’m just like I’m done with this. However, within and in between all of this happening, my dad decided the best way to get me to stay in New York would be for them to basically adopt Jess (and I mean, he ain’t wrong) and move us both out here, like he's legit getting in contact with people who might know of teaching jobs because my dad is fucking wild okay. And there is currently at least one semi-viable lawyer position open on LI right now so I mean I’ll see what happens there. My parents seem to be of the opinion that I should stay in NY even if I don't have a job lined up because I’ll get one eventually but like, that’s the exact same situation as Chicago, except I have way more contacts there and dad’s contacts have been totally unsuccessful up to this point, Sigh. This is long, Guess I had a lot to say. After dessert we pretty much retreated to my room and spent the rest of the night in here, with my dad coming in two times setting up information about jobs for both of us, and like, I told Jess before we got here my parents were probably pay her rent if I asked them too, and they definitely proved that this weekend. We didn’t really do anything else before getting ready for bed, so that’s about it. I am super super tired and we fly out early tomorrow morning (not like 6 am thankfully, but 8:30 flight still means I have to get up at six, so I am officially ending this post here so I can actually shut my eyes before the do some involuntarily. Goodnight babes. Stay gorgeous,

[livironheart]

all of them do all of them

i have perished for my hubris. it’s too late. one day I will have to atone for my crimes as will you. fool? judgment day is coming.

🍕 = What is your muse’s usual pizza order? Do they order any drinks, sides, or desserts to go with it?

Liv likes pepperoni pizza with olives. She would definitely appreciate dessert with it, as well as cheese sticks.🍾 = What is the last thing your muse celebrated? How long was the celebration?

She hasn’t done any WILD celebrations in a while. She participates in holiday events sometimes, though. The last thing she celebrated was probably her engagement.

🎉 = When is your muse’s birthday? Is there a special meaning behind the date for you (the mun)?

June 21st. There’s no special meaning other than I wanted to be cool and symbolic and put her birthday on the summer solstice.

📚 = What is your muse’s favorite genre of books? What are some of their favorite authors and/or books?

Liv loves to read adventure novels, but doesn’t have a lot of them. Mostly, she reads tomes by a variety of authors to study magic. Most of them are written by elite Kirin Tor mages.

💌  = How does your muse choose to confess to the person they’re interested in? Do they usually get rejected or accepted?

Generally, Liv isn’t the one confessing. She’s prone to suffer in silence out of the fear of rejection, but if she starts getting hints that whoever she likes feels the same about her, she’ll probably reach out. She’s also a fucking idiot and will likely run in circles for a little bit even so and be like ‘do they like me? what if they don’t like me?’🍵 = Does your muse prefer coffee, tea, or cocoa? Do they add any sweeteners? Iced or hot?

Olivier hasn’t had a lot of tea so she can’t make a call on that. She loves coffee and cocoa.

💙  = Who does your muse have a deep and loyal love for?

Finnigan Wyman. She would genuinely kill and die for him.

💸  = Has your muse written their will yet? If yes, what have they decided to give to people? If no, why not?

Olivier hasn’t written her will because she doesn’t seem to realize that’s actually a thing that everyone should do. She also doesn’t have a lot to her name. If she wrote one, she would leave everything to Finnigan. Every last bit.

🔮  = Is your muse superstitious? What superstitions do they have? Where did they pick them up from?

In a fantasy world where nearly anything is possible, it’s tough not to be superstitious. She’s been getting worse, though. She’s wondering if she suffers from divine intervention and genuinely thinks that she tempts fate sometimes.

🔒 = What is a secret that your muse will take to the grave? Why have they decided not to tell anyone?

The true name of a certain someone, the depths of her ambition, and the fact that she likes waffles more than pancakes. She will never tell Finn this.

🍭  = Does your muse have a sweet-tooth? What’s their favorite candy?

Liv ABSOLUTELY has a sweet tooth. She has a bit of a sugar addiction. She likes any and all candy unless it’s super hard and crunchy.

🍦 = What is your muse’s favorite ice cream flavor? Do they prefer eating it in a cone, cup/bowl, or straight from the carton? Do they use any toppings?

Plain chocolate in whatever form is most convenient. Sometimes she’ll add whipped cream if it’s available.

💚  = Who or what makes your muse feel envious? Why do they feel that way? Do they act out or keep their envy hidden?

Liv gets envious whenever Finn mentions Caroline, although she tries to convince herself she had no reason to feel that way. She also gets jealous when she hears people talk about their happy families or how great their parents were or the fun childhoods they had growing up. She’s also envious of success stories, as she feels that hers is out of reach.

📘  = Describe an AU verse/story that you have written out for your muse that you’d love to roleplay. Why did you choose to make them that way?

None written. Avatar AU would be kinda cool though.

📕  = Describe a crossover verse/story that you have written out for your muse that you’d love to roleplay. Why did you choose to make them that way?

None written.

🍔  = What is your muse’s usual burger made of? You can pick any bread, meat (or non-meat), cheese, condiments, and toppings. What side and drink do they prefer with it?

Hamburger, half pound, with mushrooms, swiss cheese, ketchup, salt, and sauteed mushrooms. She would definitely love fresh fries and strawberry lemonade with it.

🖍️  = What was your muse’s favorite childhood toy? Do they still have it? What special memories are attached to the toy?

She had a little gryphon that her mother carved from cedar wood. It’s still at Otu’s house in the Hinterlands, so sort of. She doesn’t have any particularly strong memories, just little times she would bring it outside with her and imagine what it would be like to fly.

🎵 = What is your muse’s favorite genre of music? What are some of their favorite artists? How important is music to them?

She would definitely like Indie/acoustic music. Finnigan is her favorite artist. She absolutely loves music and feels it in her heart and soul. She wishes she could hear it more often.

🌶️  = Can your muse handle spicy food? What is the spiciest food that they can handle?

Olivier LOVES spicy food. She says it makes eating a little more exciting. She wouldn’t be able to handle the super crazy stuff like whatever the WoW equivalent of ghost peppers is, but she enjoys jalapenos and hot sauce and stuff like that.

🍰 = Does your muse prefer cake or cupcakes? What’s their favorite cake flavor and icing/frosting flavor?

She loves chocolate cake with whipped frosting from the bottom of her heart. Make it chocolate ice cream cake with fudge and you will win her heart forever.

🍼  = Does your muse have children or do they ever want to have children? Do they think they will/would be a good parent?

She has no children and doesn’t want children because she thinks she would be a bad parent. She remembers how she grew up and is afraid she would accidentally force the same neglect on someone else. Also, she vehemently despises the thought of pregnancy. If she ever got kids, she would adopt, and it would be MANY years from now.

☠️ = How would your muse prefer to die? What do they want done with their body after they die?

Quickly, in the line of battle, doing something cool and glorious in defense of the Alliance or the ones she loves. She would want to be cremated and have her ashes scattered in the Hinterlands.

👻  = Does your muse believe in ghosts? What is your muse’s scariest experience with spirits/the unknown?

She definitely believes in ghosts. Her scariest experience was practically becoming one during the final battle against Krath’ul.

🛀  = Does your muse prefer baths or showers? What’s their favorite body wash scent? What kind of shampoo/conditioner do they use?

She loves both, but probably prefers baths. She likes pine, vanilla, and roses. She would use shampoo/conditioner with any of those scents.

📱 = What type of cell phone does your muse have? What apps do they frequently use? Who do they text or call most often?

Liv doesn’t have a phone because they don’t exist in WoW, but if she did she would absolutely own a Samsung.

⛎  = What is your muse’s zodiac sign? Does it fit their personality?

Cancer; yes.

🔋  = Who or what drains your muse the most? Who or what helps to revitalize that energy?

People. She loves conversation, but extended amounts of time with people (especially the ones that piss her off) can be intensely draining for her emotions. Taking time to herself to sleep or cuddle with her s/o is what generally helps. Also, being out in nature.

💊  = Does your muse have any physical or mental disabilities/illnesses? Do they take medication for it?

She has anxiety and PTSD, and takes no medication.

🗳️  = Is your muse liberal, conservative, or somewhere in-between? What political party do they align themselves with most?

No political parties in WoW, but she would probably lean toward the liberal side.

📺  = What TV shows does your muse like to watch the most? Do they prefer watching them as they air on network or do they stream them later?

No TV in WoW.

🎞️  = What is your muse’s favorite movie genre? What are their top five favorite movies? Do they prefer watching movies at home or in the theater?

Liv has never seen a movie in her entire life and probably never will.

🐾  = What is your muse’s favorite animal? Do they have or do they want any pets?

Olivier loves foxes and gryphons. She has a pet cockatiel that she loves and cherishes.

🌈  = Is your muse LGBT+? What do they identify themselves as?

It’s a little-known fact, but Liv is bisexual. She’s never been in a serious relationship with a woman, though, so the only people that know this are the ones she has shared it with.

⛈️  = What type of weather is your muse’s favorite? What do they usually like to do when they have a day off when it’s their favorite weather?

Olivier loves warm summer nights, when it’s not so hot that things are unbearable. The world is warm but the sun is down. The stars are out, a cool breeze rustles the grass and trees, and nothing feels more perfect. She likes to spend these nights at the fire festival when it’s going on, or simply somewhere out in nature. She also likes thunderstorms when she doesn’t have to be outside in them.

💐  = How would your muse respond to receiving a bouquet from an admirer? What kind of flowers would they prefer in the bouquet?

Liv fucking loves flowers, dude. She loves receiving bouquets and will get incredibly affectionate when she gets one (unless it’s from someone that’s not her s/o).

💔  = When is a time your muse was heart-broken? Was it someone else’s fault or your muse’s? What did they do to get over it?

When she left Rook. It was her fault. She ate some ice cream and moved on. It still bothers her a little bit, but she’s beginning to see him in a different light, so it’s not a huge issue. It was hard for her to so easily discard all the memories they had, though. Another time was when Finnigan died, and she was led to believe he was permanently dead. And the monks of Northshire didn’t allow her to see his body to pay respects.

💤  = What position does your muse sleep in? What side of the bed do they prefer? How many blankets and pillows do they usually use? Do they snore or sleep with stuffed animals?

Olivier sleeps on her back with her hand on her stomach or on her side. When she sleeps with Finn, she definitely prefers to be the little spoon. She sleeps with a lot of pillows and a lot of blankets for maximum comfort. She doesn’t snore or sleep with stuffed animals.

🛑  = What is one of your muse’s pet-peeves? 

Ironically, arrogant people. A lot of people call Liv arrogant, which is sometimes true, but she doesn’t see it. She hates narcissists and people who are rude and unkind to others without reason.

▶️  = Make a playlist of five songs that your muse would enjoy.

King and Lionheart - Of Monsters and Men

Ignite - Zedd

Better Days - Hedley

Reluctant Heroes - AmaLee

I See Fire - Celtic Woman

🔆  = Out of your muse’s group of friends, who do they find the most attractive? Would they ever ask them out?

Aside from Finnigan, she finds Tiara pretty attractive. She would never ask her out because she only sees her as a friend, Tia is married, and Liv is engaged. Still, she appreciates beauty when she sees it.

🏖️  = What would your muse be doing on a day out to the beach? Are they the type to get in the water or just sit on the shore?

She would definitely be in the water splashing around. She would take turns doing that and lying out to laze in the sun, though.

🏥  = Has your muse ever been to the hospital for an injury or illness? How long did they have to stay?

She’s been in the infirmary multiple times for injuries, sometimes for days or weeks at a time. She’s never been out for more than a month, though.

🎠  = What is your muse’s favorite carnival ride, game, and food? What do they like to do first when they go to a carnival?

Funnel cakes are her absolute favorite, but she’ll eat just about any carnival food. She doesn’t ever really play the games or go on rides. She just likes to walk around, dance, listen to the music, watch the people, and spend quality time with her loved ones.

🚨 = Has your muse ever been in trouble with the police? What crime did they commit? Did they have to stay in jail?

Liv got censured because she inflicted cruel and unusual punishment upon someone impeding an investigation by singing his face.

🥇 = Has your muse ever won a contest or competition? What was the contest/competition? What did they receive as a prize, if anything?

No.

🎸 = Can your muse play an instrument? If yes, which one(s)? If no, do they want to learn how to play? Can they write lyrics or sing?

She can play a little bit of guitar, but she’s desperately out of practice. She can sing, but she’s bad at writing lyrics.

🎮  = What is your muse’s favorite genre of video games? What system do they prefer? What are some of their favorite games? Do they like to play online with other people?

Ain’t no video games in WoW. Modern AU Liv is definitely an elitist in Overwatch, though.

🍳 = Does your muse know how to cook? What dish of theirs is the most popular among their friends/family? What would they consider their specialty?

She used to be a terrible cook, but she’s always been a quick learner. As soon as she started to watch other people cook, she was able to pick up their techniques. She tends to stick strictly to recipes, but she’s just starting to experiment with cooking different combinations of things.

👽 = Does your muse believe in aliens? Have they ever seen a UFO? Do they believe they’ve been abducted before, or do they know anyone who claims to have been abducted?

O_O

[winchesters-love]

Get To Know Me!!! A Little Too Well

1. Name: Nicole 2. Nickname(s): Nik, Nikki 3. Birthday: June 21 4. That makes you: 18 5. Where were you born: Nebraska 6. Location right now: Same place 7. Shoe size: 7 8. How many piercings?: None 9. Tattoos?: None, but I'd love a few <3 10. When you wake up you're: Confused and even more tired 11. When your about to sleep you're: Wide awake 12. Zodiac sign: Cancerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr/Gemini 13. Chinese sign: Rabbit 14. Righty or Lefty: Righty 15. Innie or Outie: Innie 16. School: Out of school :P Section Two: Looks 17. Nationality: White 20. Weight: 110 lbs 21. Height: 5'6 22. Braces? No 23. Glasses? Yes Section Three: Private Life 24. Do you have a boy/girlfriend? I do! 25. If so, who? The love of my life, Nate 26. If not, do you have a crush on someone? My boyfriend 27. Who has a crush on you? No one haha 28. Ever cheated on your bf/gf? Nope 29. Who was your first kiss: Nate, he kisses pretty good 30. Who was your last kiss: Nate <3 31. Are you a virgin? Yes 32. Ever had a threesome before? No 33. NQ- Ever been swarmed by ladybugs?: Nope 34. Have you ever been in love? Yes 35. Broken any hearts? Not that I know of 36. Got your heart broken? Quite a few times 37. Ever liked a friend? Yea 38. What happened? We started dating

Section Four: Past Relationships 39. How many relationships have you been in? 1 40. How many were serious enough to count: I'm in it 41. Who were those serious ones: I've only been in 1 42. NQ- Who USED to be your best friend: Well, he's still my best friend so 43. What made them different: Nothing 44. What happened: We started dating 45. Best boy/girlfriend: The one I'm dating 46. Worst boy/girlfriend: N/A 47. Ever been kissed: Yes 48. Who do you want back: No one 49. What do you regret: Focusing too much on guys 50. Why? Because I would've done so much better in school Section Five: Favourites 51. Song: Sound of Silence 52. Movie: Zootopia 53. Food: Anything really 54. Drink: Apple Juice 55. Store: Gamestop and Hot Topic 56. Television show: Stranger Things and Mom 57. Holiday: Christmas 58. Book: Grace Lost Series 59. Ice cream: Mint Chip 60. Sweets: Chocolate 61. Crisps: Doritos Jacked 62. Type of music: Pretty much every genre 63. Artist: Singer is Luke Bryan, Painter is Bob Ross 64. Word: Loquacious, vernacular 65. Time of day: Evening/night 66. Dressing: Ranch 67. Alcoholic drink: Don't drink 68. Colour(s): Blue, Red, Black, and White 69. Piece of clothing: Beanie 70. Character: My fursona 71. Smell: Fresh rainfall 72. Shampoo: Fructis 73. Soap: Fructis 74. Smiley: >3 75. Board game: Too many tbh 76. Sport: Soccer 77. Number: 5 78. Quote: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." Franklin D. Roosvelt 79. Animal: Wolf 80. Actor: Ryan Reynolds/Chris Pratt 82. Vegetable: Sugar snap peas 83. Fruit: Grapes 84. Place to be: In my room 85. Thing in your room: Pictures 86. Gum: 5-gum 87. Shape: Circle 88. Country: Europe 89. Mall: Any mall 90. Car: 67 Chevy Impala 91. Boy's name: Christopher 92. Girl's name: Chrissy 93. Family member: My brothers and my dad 94. Restaurant: Johnny Carinos 95. Movie place: The theater 96. Person to go to the movies with: Myself 97. Noise: Falling rain 98. Brand of Shoe: Airwalks 99. Brand of clothing: Aeropostle 100. Body part of a chicken: Thigh 101. Swear word: Asshat 102. Month: December 103. Possession: My ring 104. Team: Don't have a favorite 105. Season: Winter 106. Radio station: Pop station 107. Magazine: Don't read them 108. Favourite grade: Senior year 109. Least favourite grade: 5th grade 110. Teacher: Kindergarten 111. Least favourite teacher: Math teacher in 5th grade, he was a douche 112. Subject: Art/Choir 113. Subject to talk about: Anything and everything Section Six: Family 114. Who's your mum?: Not here 115. Who's your dad?: My role model 116. Any step-parents?: Yea, had a few 117. Any brothers?: 2 118. Any Sisters?: Nope 120. Coolest: Older brother 121. Loudest: Me 122. Best relative: My cousin 123. Worse relative: No one 124. Do you get along with your parents? My dad, yea 125. With your siblings? Mostly, we game with each other 126. Does anyone understand you? Yea 127. Do you have any pets? Nah 128. If so, what kind and name? 129. If not, what do you want as a pet? I want another dog, we had to get rid of ours Section Seven: School 131. Are you still in school? Nope 132. Did you drop out?: 2.75, I didn't pay attention freshman and sophomore year 133. Your current GPA: No thanks 134. Do you buy or bring lunch?: School bill paid for it 135. ABC's?: Know them 136. Favorite class: Choir and art 137. Play any sports at school?: Played soccer 138. Are you popular? With the outcasts 139. Favourite memory: Being the only girl good at soccer 140. Most humiliating moment: Falling in front of my close guy friends 141. Most funniest moment: Hitting someone in the face with a soccer ball 142. Most scared moment: Graduating Section Eight: What do you think of when you hear 145. Chicken: Bawk bawk 146. Dog: Soft puppy 147. Christina Aguilera: Music 148. Ricky Martin: Who? 149. 50 cent: Rapper 150. Poop: Emoji 151. Beach: Sand 152. Dessert: Cactus 153. Water: Blue 154. Osama: Bin Laden 155. Love: Life 156. Your little brother: Xbox One 157. Butt: Nice 158. Clowns: Pennywise 159. Wonder: Over Yander 16o. Brown: Pants 161. Banana: Yum 162. Sex: Rope 163. Parents: One 164. Homosexuals: Jensen and Jared 165. God: Father Section Nine: Do you believe in 166. God: Yes 167. Heaven: Yes 168. Devil: Yes 169. Hell: In a sense 170: Boogey man: No 171. Closet Monsters: Nah 172. Fortune telling: Nope 173. Magic: Nuh uh 174. Love at first sight: Depends 175. Ghosts: Nope 176. Voo-doo dolls: Nah 177. Reincarnation: Nope 178. Yourself: Ehh, not really Section Ten: Do you 179. Smoke: And kill my lungs? No thanks 180. Do drugs: Pfft, why would I? 181. Drink alcohol: Again, I'm not trying to die at a young age 182. Cuss: Yea 183. Sing in the shower: Sometimes... 184. Like school: Yea, it was the best place to be! 185. Want to get married: Mhmm, and I'm glad I found someone 186. Type with all of your fingers: Not really 187. Think you're attractive: Most days 188. Drink and drive: Fuck this 189. Snore: Sometimes 190. Sleep walk: Nope 191. Like watching sunrises and sunsets: Best place to be honestly Section Eleven: Have you ever 192. Flashed someone: On accident 193. Gotten so drunk til you threw up everywhere: I don't drink 194. Told that person how you felt: Yep 195. Been arrested: Nope 196. Gone to jail or juve: No 197. Skateboarded: Yes 198. Skinny dipped: In a bath 199. Rock climbed: Do it every summer 200. Killed someone: Nope 201. Watched porn: Nah 202. Gone on a road trip: Kinda 203. Went out of the country: Nah 204. Talked back to an adult: Yes 205. Broken a law: Nope 206. Got pulled over: Don't drive 208: Cried to get out of trouble: I don't usually do anything bad 209. Let a friend cry on your shoulder: I'm supposed to, I'm there to listen 210. Kissed a brother's or sister's friend: No 211. Kissed a friend's brother or sister: No 212. Dropped something on the floor and let someone eat it anyways: Nah, I usually eat it 213. Mooned someone: Yes, once 214. Shop-lifted: No 215. Worked at McDonald's: No thank you 216. Eaten a dog: A hot dog! 217. Give money to a homeless person: Yea, I've fed them too 218. Glued your hand to yourself: Yes 219. Kissed someone of the same sex: Playing Pocky 220. Had a one night stand: I have two right beside my bed 221. Smoked: Nope 222. Done drugs: No 223. Lose a friend because of your ex: I don't have any exes 224. Slap someone for being stupid: Yes 225. Had cyber sex: Sexted?? Kinda 226. Wish you were the opposite sex: A lot more often than I should sometimes. But for completely different reasons 227. Caught someone doing something: Yea 228. Played a game that removes clothing: Strip truth or dare ;) 229. Cried during a movie: All the damn time 230. Cried over someone: It's hard not to when you can't have an actor love you 231. Wanted to hook up with a friend: Yea, and I did 232. Hooked up with someone you barely met: Nah 233. Ran away from home: Nope 234. Cheated on a test: Once Section Twelve: Would you 235. Bungee jump: Nope 236. Sky dive: Hate heights 237. Swim with dolphins: Yes 238. Steal a friend's bf or gf: That goes against girl code 239. Try to be the opposite sex: No 240. Lie to the police: Hi officer my real name is Nicholas... Cage 241. Run from the police: No 242. Lie to your parents: Done it before 243. Backstab a friend for your own well being: That's just plain rude 244. Be an exotic dancer: Only for my boyfriend <3 245. NQ- Kill the president: Nah Section Thirteen: Are you 246. Shy: Yes, especially around new people 247. Loud: Extremely 248. Nice: I try to be 249: Outgoing: I fake being outgoing haha 250: Quiet: Yea 251. Mean: Depends, I'm mean to those I like 252. Emotional: Sad to say, but yea 253. Sensitive: Mhmm 254. Gay: I'm very happy 255. Strong: I wish, need to start working out 256. Weak: Yea 257. Caring: Yes, especially towards animals 258. Dangerous: Well, does this include caving? 259. Crazy: Uh huh 260. Spontaneous: I am the most random and spontaneous thing out there 261. Funny: I try to be, I fail at it 262. Sweet: To eat ;) 263. Sharing: With most things, but not my food 264. Responsible: Most of the time 265. Trustworthy: Definitely, if you want a secret kept come talk to me 266. Open-minded: Depends on what you mean 267. Creative: For the most part 268. Cute: Um, not even close, no matter how many of y'all say I am 269. Slick: They don't call me Nik the Slick for nothing 270. Smart: Yea 271. Dumb: I act like it 272. Evil: No 273. Ghetto: If only 274. Classy: As in sassy 275. Photogenic: Nope 276. Dependable: Only on a few select things 277. Greedy: Only with food 278. Ugly: Yes, 100 times over 279. Messy: With my life 280. Neat: With everything else 281. Perverted: You can say cookie and it'll go bad 282. Silly: Yea 283. A B****: I can be if you want me to be 284. A Good Listener: Mhmm 285. A Fighter: If you make me mad enough 286. A Party Animal: I'd rather read, thanks 287. A Game Freak: YES 288. A Computer Freak: I literally want to work on computers Section Fourteen: Future 289. Dream job: Animation 290. Dream house: Somewhere out in the country 291. Husband/Wife: My sweet redheaded boyfriend 292. Kids: 2 293. Names: Something with Ns 294. Pets: Literally so many 295. Car: Anything that gets me places 296. Age you would want to get married: I wouldn't mind getting married in the next few years 297. Best Man/Bride's Maid: My best friend Elena 298. Honeymoon: Anyplace that has a bedroom Section Fifteen: Your friends 299. Best friend: Elena, Nate, Jasmine, Kelsey 300. Known the longest: Nate 301. Craziest: Elena 302. Loudest: Elena and I 303. Shyest: Jasmine and Kelsey 304. Best hair: Kelsey 305. Best eyes: Kelsey 306. Best body: Nate 307. Most Athletic: Me 308. Hot-Tempered: Elena 309. Most impatient: Me 310. Shortest: Nate 311. Tallest: Kelsey 312. Skinniest: Me 313. Best singer: Me 314. Funniest: Literally all of us 315. Can always make you laugh: All of them 316. Wish you talked to more: Elena 317. Wish you saw more: All of them 318. Who drives you insane after a while: Elena, but in a good way 319. Who you can stay around forever and never get sick of: All of them 320. Ever lose a friend because you took it to the 'next level': Nah, I'm dating Nate 321. Whose always been there when you need them: All of them 322. Who is like your family: All of them 323. How many friends do you have?: Quite a few, and I love each and every one of them 324. How many are really close? About 10? Section Sixteen: The last 325. Thing you ate: Poptarts 326. Thing you drank: Apple juice 327. Thing you wore: My hoodie 328. Thing you did: This meme 329. Place you went: The store 330. Thing you got pierced or tattooed: Nothing 331. Person you saw: My dad 332. Person you hugged: My dad 333. Person you kissed: Nate 334. NQ- Person you beat to a juicy pulp: I wish I had done that to a couple jerks 335. Person you talked to online: Nate 336. Person you talked to on the phone: Nate 337. Song you heard: Vulnerable by Secondhand Serenade 338. Show you saw: Mom 339. Time you fought with your parents: Um... about a month or two? 340. Time you fought with a friend: Haven't for a while 341. Words you said: Fuck you is what I said Section Seventeen: Now 343. What are you eating: Poptart 344. What are you drinking: Apple juice 345. What are you thinking: About my boyfriend 346. What are you wearing: My hoodie 347. What are you doing: Writing this up 349. Hair: Down 350. Mood: Tired 351. Listening to: Spotify 352. Talking to anyone: Yea 353. Watching anything: Nah Section Eighteen: Yes or No 354. Are you a vegetarian: Mostly 355. Are you a carnivore: Nah 356. Are you heterosexual: Yes 357. Do you like penguins: Yes 358. Do you write poetry: Yes 359. Do you see stupid people: Yes 360. You + Me: No 361. Do you like the Osbournes: Yes 362. Can you see flying pigs: No 363. Do you sleep with stuffed animals on your bed: Yes 364. Are you from Afghanistan: No 365. Is Christina Aguilera ugly: No 366. Are you a zombie: No 367. Am i annoying you: Yes 368. Do you bite your nails: Yes 369. Can you cross your eyes: Yes 370. Do you make your bed in the morning: No 371. Have you touched someone's private part: Yes Section Nineteen: This or That 372. Winter or Summer: Winte 373. Spring or Autumn: Autumn 374. Shakira or Britney: Britney 375. MTV or VH1: MTV 376. Black or White: White 377. Yellow or Pink: Pink 378. Football or Basketball: Football 379. Mobile Phone or Pager: Mobile 380. Pen or Pencil: Pencil 381. Cold or Hot: Hot 382. Tattoos or Piercings: Tattoos 383. Inside or Outside: Inside 384. Weed or Alcohol: No 385. Coke or Pepsi: Pepsi 386. Tape or Glue: Tape 387. McDonald's or In-n-Out: In-Out Section Twenty: Opinions 388. What do you think about classical music: I like it 389. About boy bands: Nah 390: About suicide: Talk to someone if you're thinking about suicide. It is a very real thing and should not be joked about. I don't want to find out that any of you are no longer here because of suicide. I've lost 2 very close friends that way. 391. About people who try to force their opinions on you: They can kindly fuck off 392. About teen pregnancy: Only if they know they'll be able to take care of the baby 393. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years: With my husband in some country town 394. Who do you think you'll still be friends with in 5 years: Nate, Elena, Kelsey, Jasmine, hopefully all my friends 395. About gay men: They're human too Section Twenty-One: 396. Do you have a website: I'm working on building one 397. Current weather right now: Cold as balls 398. Current time: 7:00 399. Last thoughts: Byyyye