#especially because idk why that happened
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"You're here. You're really here."
"Promise?"
"I swear."
#dragon age#da veilguard#dragon age veilguard#rookanis#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#lucanis x rook#lucanis romance#rook ingellvar#my ocs#antimo ingellvar#lucantimo#lucanis' lifted up leg at the end makes me chuckle 😭💖💖#anyway now that i nocited that the part before the kiss isnt sync with ny rook's lips im pissed off 😭😭😭#especially because idk why that happened#they still look cute tho 😔💖
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TW; SLIGHTLY SUGGESTIVE(???), Im not sure but it feels like I've done smth illegal ASKDJNADSFKJADNFS
I tried to draw smth cute again but ended up looking... uh...
but then I added in
Overall, intrusive thoughts won that night help--
#slightly suggestive#I actually cant tell since in context they just kissed here but just to be safe#I don't know how to draw an actual kiss drawing so have the aftermath of them having a kiss#But somehow it came out a bit sus especially with a bit of saliva(how else would you know this is like the after kiss? asdkfjnadskfjnad)#I know this would never happened canonically so lets pretend in another life they try romance and manon still survives#dead plate#dead plate game#dead plate fanart#rody lamoree#vince charbonneau#rody x vincent#just found out rody is canonically bi and biphobic which makes sense because of the era this was set in#still ship them tho idk why help ADSLKJFNADSFKJANDSFJDF#I swear it was supposed to be an oc drawing but I ended drawing these mfers again what the hell#the next one will deffo be a manon-related one if I have time
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Amphibia is proof that the best character writing tip is to make everyone at least a little bit problematic
#this is why all of my OCs are horrible people in one way or another#this goes for relationships too#lum1ty is cute and all but nothing about it ever destroyed me nearly as much as even the most tame scene between any members of#the calamity trio. and ik it's because the relationship between those 3 is what drives the story while lum1ty is a romantic subplot and all#but my objection is: that's precisely the problem#it's supposedly meant to be the fluff amongst the angst. a refuge from everything else that happens in the show#plus it's not the MAIN main relationship of the show - the main relationship is between Eda Luz and King#but... i genuinely believe divorcing lum1ty from the rest of the story does them a disservice. imagine how could it would have been if#they let amity be a little bit worse. deeper into the emperor's coven or something. with a more intense rivalry w luz#characters in toh just need more Drama imo especially luz's friends#hunter is great *because* he's Dramatic#this isn't toh bashing. i love toh. i just can't help but feel it's an example of characters being too... *nice*#cant remember who said that the only thing worth writing about was the human heart in conflict with itself and#im sorry but you can't convince me a character like gus or willow is just as much in conflict with themselves as like. idk. hop pop.
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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
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DATV Spoilers Just in Case!) I’ve seen a head canon floating around that when solas puts a mage!Rook in the regret prison, it tranquilizes them. What do you think Viago’s reaction to this happening to a Crow!Rook would be?
i think there's a small terrible part of viago that instinctively thinks it was a bad investment/solution to send rook off with varric, since he's lost one of his best assassins. and then of course he hates that this is his first reaction because rook is more than that to him, but he's been conditioned by their lives to worry about his power and the mission first. and then i think he throws himself into trying to prove that he is a better man than that by finding a cure, without being obvious about it, even if his worry actually makes him messier and obvious. a similar outward reaction to what i've seen people headcanon about how he feels when he gets the news that rook is stuck in the fade trap in general (anger, determination, frustration, etc)
the idea of viago as a man who clings to "i rose to this rank for a reason, above the other crows. i'm a killer but with my poisons, i'm cleaner. i'm royalty. i'm better." is so beautiful to me. who he wants by his side/publically allies with is made more interesting to me for that reason. rook and teia make a very short list, so for him to lose either of them (especially to a fate worse than death. like i know there's a cure but i'm not sure if that's common knowledge and it has rammys bro) will inevitably cause a crash out the likes of which thedas may have never seen before <3
#tho also i have no fucking clue. i love viago and his high strung freakish tendencies#but a lot of this is just me thinking of viago and not necessarily this specific ask. sorry anon#there are other people on here with a better grasp on vi#and i plan to keep it this way because the moment i have to think of him as a mentor figure#it pollutes my vision board for him. LOL#i don't think i'll ever play a de riva rook because i'll ruin my own experiment#this is my control variable. it's a wildlife documentary…#just because the baby crow is about to be cannibalised doesn't mean i'm going to stop it from happening#sorry. i know i said all that and im now saying 'but idk' but its true#my understanding of viago i think is mixed at best. i have not read the comics he is in and#8 little talons is very much a high stakes scenario where he hates literally everything thats happening#so that might not be a perfect judge of character. ive never seen this guy relaxed ever#tho saying this. this is probably his default state LOL#viago de riva#txt#anonymous#answered#it just feels a bit weird for me to enjoy 'the crows are morally grey' but then be like 'not my favorite talon viago tho'#i think viago should mistreat rook. for my sake. but then i would feel weird. which is why i shouldnt speak on it#i cannot be an unbiased party LOL. like im not saying he /directly/ abused rook#because i think w his age and timelines it just wouldnt be him. but i also dont think he's fucking speaking up and going#'NO MORE CORPORAL PUNISHMENT! I'LL PROTECT YOU ROOK!'#like be serious. thats a grown man near the top of the hierarchy. just another crow so used to abuse#and double crossing and violence that he takes it as a normal and given for his life/world#which obviously. like. creates issues in his personal life. whether thats with teia or with rook. lmfao.#especially with a guy this paranoid. he just strikes me as the guy to intentionally hurt rook so others dont recognise his weakness#'they need to see me punish you so that they won't kill you' <- totally normal thought to have viago you're so normal
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sorry 4 always complaining but i am so over "the gods arent real" reveals . why are u so opposed to faith and the belief in something u cant comprehend fully but still devote urself to anyway. is that not a form of love. yawn.
#likeeeeeeeee. this is part of my problem with da4 . the revelations about the evanuris literally happened nearly ten years ago#with the release of trespasser. and from what ive seen in interviews with david gaider that was always the plan.#for the elven gods to be fake#and idk its so cruel and callous ?? have the dalish and the elves not suffered enough.#especially considering the dalish and elves in general r explicitly based upon indigenous/romani/jewish peoples#going into da4 i was kind of hoping that not all the evanuris were as solas said they were#because why should we trust every word he says. the devs even say dont trust solas entirely#and then nope they didnt do any of that they just had the entire pantheon be tyrants#like ok. sure.#and then it turns out they're all dead anyway. lmfao.#so we never get to see another perspective . just elgar'nan and ghilan'nain being hurdudrdur we're evil and stuff#like :))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ok#datvg spoilers#da4 spoilers
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Low quality books that appear to be AI generated are making their way into public libraries via their digital catalogs, forcing librarians who are already understaffed to either sort through a functionally infinite number of books to determine what is written by humans and what is generated by AI, or to spend taxpayer dollars to provide patrons with information they don’t realize is AI-generated.
With Hoopla, librarians have to opt into Hoopla’s entire catalog, then pay for whatever their customers choose to borrow from that catalog. The only way librarians can limit what Hoopla books their customers can borrow is by setting a limit on the price of books. For example, a library can use Hoopla but make it so their customers can only borrow books that cost the library $5 per use.
“Investigating these authors, their book covers, their social media, etc takes A LOT OF TIME, especially with the volume of questionable material increasing month to month (and that's not including the sheer amount of legitimate books published each month in adult fiction that I'm looking at),” one librarian who asked to remain anonymous so she could talk openly about her job, told me. “Is it the best use of my time doing this work on top of my other duties when customers may or may not care? And with the rising multitudes of AI generated content, will there come a point where it just ‘is what it is?’”
This type of low quality, AI generated content, is what we at 404 Media and others have come to call AI slop. Librarians, whose job it is in part to curate what books their community can access, have been dealing with similar problems in the publishing industry for years, and have a different name for it: vendor slurry. While the term now encompasses what seems like AI-generated content as well, it predates the rise of generative AI, and also refers to the glut of low quality, often self-published ebooks or book “summaries” that are common on Hoopla. As some librarians told me, the sheer quantity of books in Hoopla’s service makes it seem more valuable because it offers such a large number of books, but in reality that number is misleadingly inflated by this slurry.
Several of the librarians I talked to said that they are worried about discussing [the problems raised by Hoopla's weak, unclear selection policies, including the 2022 inclusion of explicitly white nationalist texts,] because of the growing hostility towards libraries and groups like Moms for Liberty demanding that books about LGBTQ rights, race, and ethnicity be removed from libraries. One the one hand, librarians want to curate their collections and make sure their patrons are getting access to quality information. On the other hand, they don’t want people to think that they are trying to censor what materials patrons can access in way that’s comparable to what organizations like Moms for Liberty want. None of the librarians I talked to suggested the AI-generated content needed to be banned from Hoopla and libraries only because it is AI-generated. It might have its place, but it needs to be clearly labeled, and more importantly, provide borrowers with quality information.
#404media yaaaaay#public libraries#part of the reason this happens is that libraries have a very hard time applying meaningful vendor pressure#if you look at the ALA's 2023 digital public library ecosystem report it's really clear that there are very few vendors in this space#libby has a massive monopoly (>90% of libraries with ebooks use libby) but hoopla is also extremely popular in part because it's owned#by midwest tape which has been the primary library supplier of A/V materials for decades. libraries are niche small & underfunded-#& patrons want ebooks! ebook usage skyrocketed in 2020 & hasn't really gone back down. so hoopla is a convenient solution#it's EXPENSIVE for a lot of libraries - if you want to know why there's a monthly borrowing limit or a daily borrowing cap that's why#but it's very convenient & many libraries don't have staff that work on just digital collections; it's just a new responsibility#real time crunch / poor options problem. anyway idk what options look like internationally & i would be interested to find out#but this is why i stan cloudlibrary; they are A Competitor. the real solution ofc is to have a genuinely publicly owned & run platform#but that won't happen almost anywhere. NYPL does have an opensource app for some of their collections tho which is cool#also this article is being nice. the AI slop problem is plausibly also on the shelf! that shouldn't happen if you have enough time#to do good collection development but some libraries don't have the right staff. especially likely in spanish language collections#that are being purchased by people who don't speak spanish. in my experience. it's a mess
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i can't tell if i'm just not paying attention or if mouthwashing just doesn't make any sense
#random thoughts#mouthwashing#watching a playthrough and am on the Big Twist so more stuff may happen or whatever#like jimmy raped anya. none of her behavior before this really like clued this in but whatever#doesn't really. add anything to the story so far. could really replace it with anything and the story would still be the same#seems like it's just there to give jimmy a reason to crash the ship#also don't like that he crashed the ship. curly crashing it made him more of a compelling character for me#like it's established he gives the same answers every time in the mental health check ups#make him like. succumb to the pressures of the job. instead of just being kind of a shitty normal boss#and like. anya doesn't want to give jimmy his check up and be alone with him while he makes up sexually deviant lies. could be foreshadowing#but she asks him to give curly his medicine. she doesn't seem to OBJECT to him becoming captain.#she was also a lot more compelling when it seemed like she was struggling due to the pressures of the job#i like swansea. reminds me of uncle billy from the outcasts of poker flat#his final where's johnny moment is kind of out of nowhere. is it because jimmy has the gun?#i doubt it's about the rape. did jimmy do something else? did swansea find out he crashed the ship?#i wish i didn't get to see curly's face before the crash. like give me some room to ponder dude#daisuke and swansea's dynamic is really fun! especially in the pre-crash scenes#my main problem with anya is she didn't have any single character to play off of. daisuke had swansea. curly had jimmy.#she's just kind of there. and miserable. and sucks at her job#also why is curly still alive??? like she killed herself in front of him but didn't take him out? tf anya#there's like 30 mins left so idk maybe some of my complaints will be rectificed. or maybe mouthwashing just isn't for me#literally my main complaint is the rape subplot so if they do something interesting with that then we're golden
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Etoiles, bitter and resentful, still trying to be kind and still looking out for Bad, wondering where the justice is that he’s forgotten purgatory. Roier beyond angry, pissed, furious, breaking the stone of his basement and wondering just why everyone else seems to have forgotten purgatory. Red team with the only confirmed missing members, who grew to rely on eachother, now separated, while Bad, their biggest aggressor and source of trauma, gets to get off like nothing happened. Gets to walk around with his son. Gets to visit them all and start casual conversation as if purgatory never happened. But it did, and he can’t, not with Roier. Who tries to shoo Bad away, encourages him to drink lava. Not with Etoiles, who while he’s patient and seemingly gentle, keeps constantly reminding him about his actions in purgatory. Maybe with Phil, who’s tried since the beginning to be the one above it all, the bloodshed and the fallout.
I dunno. something about how Cellbit and Foolish haven’t returned, and Roier is taking care of another kid, and Baghera is gone and Etoiles just has to carry on with his duties in the resistance, and Max is dead and the island doesn’t even know, and their kids are all in a coma except for Dapper, who sticks with his father, and the rest of blue team don’t seem to be stuck with the anger and misery, don’t seem to remember purgatory like they do. red team won, and they’re the ones who lost the most. red team won, and they’re the ones who cannot move on, who will not move on, as much as the island wants them to. something about trauma, and the rage that comes with the aftermath, when people try to return to normal, because how can you act like nothing happened when we’re still without our family, our loved ones, how dare you act like nothing happened when it did happen, and we’re still suffering for it?
#especially around bad. like his radiation induced brain damage isn’t his fault but by god does it turn the situation to something so unfair#no bad. Roier doesn’t want to go on an adventure with you. he doesn’t want to spend time with you. I wish you knew better about why#because there are consequences to your actions. by god there are consequences#idk just like. Roier without husband without father sis and son in a coma taking care of another kid like yeah good question why is everyon#else pretending like purgatory didn’t happen. it did. it fucking did. denial cannot save you now#it’s just. rahhhhhhhh rah rah rah#why does bad as the main agressor get to forget everything. everyone’s still stuck with his claws in their throat how dare he move forward#like yeah we all know why like#brain damage and radiation poisoning and all that jazz bad is suffering through his other actions thus far#it’s just. where’s the justice. where’s anyone else facing this. because red cannot get out of purgatory they cannot ignore it and they’re#doing awful just so awful#qsmp#mcyt#q!roier#q!etoiles#q!bbh#z speaks
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one day we will talk about how tennis fans talk about/treat players they find attractive versus players they dont…………
#and sorry but. a lot of you do this!#im sure i do it as well#but sometimes it’s just feels like…idk really obvious that that’s what’s happening#idk it pisses me off. but especially with the wta it feels reductive sometimes to call it out#like ‘oh you’re only supporting her bc she’s pretty’ like EWWW. what a nasty thing to say#BUT i do think it’s true sometimes!!!!#not that people only support players they think are pretty#but that people are far more sympathetic or that they’re more likely to get behind a player they aren’t *usually* a fan of#does this make sense?#and i think it extends to the atp as well but partially less obvious bc ppl let men get away with anything anyway lol#lowkey it feels mean to talk about because any comparisons i make have to insinuate someone’s attractiveness…#but like it really feels like the elephant in the room sometimes…like how do you not see what you’re doing here#and can i be real! i think karo is a massive beneficiary of this!#and i think that’s part of why i notice it so much because i notice the way people talk about her and support her (which of course i love)#but then i compare that with other players who have had similar stories…and i feel like i do have the perspective here—#because i see so much of what is said about karo#so it feels quite obvious when she’s honestly? treated *very* well considering her career#we’ve seen plenty of players who have injury issues who are just labeled inconsistent or as having ‘physical issues’#i think karo gets a lot of sympathy in comparison…and id even go so far as to say i think she’s overhyped sometimes!#which i know is a wild thing to say as a huge fan of hers but i think it’s true! idk. this is not really the point but im trying to explain#what i meant by the earlier tags. that some players who are seen as attractive are given way more leniency in general
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I would never wish growing up in a hyper religious African house on my worst enemy. The cognitive dissonance is insane especially if you grow up in the West yet your family (and other African families around you) insist on clinging on to asinine “traditions” that are really just covers for abuse.
#uchiha-gaeshi overshares#like I want us to fight as equals not with you and your damaged self esteem#why is my mum calling me ‘rebellious’ for having a vibraotr when I’m fully 23???#my mum once went on a rant about me and my sister not upholding ‘traditions’#my naive ass thought she was talking about idk a secret family recipe or dance or whatever#she was talking about us doing everything she says without question#I recall VIVIDLY an almost argument I had with her when I was 14-15#asking her to lay off on pressuring me academically#because I was getting stressed and it started negatively affecting my mental health#and then she just went apeshit on me#‘ungrateful’ is their go to jerk reaction to their children acting like people#oh and my parents are one of the ‘nice’obes btw#I’ve heard wayyyy to many stories of people’s parents just beating the absolute living crap about them#for the most benign shit like having crushes or something#off topic but is it normal for parents to tell kids to be careful what they say to teachers#so that the teachers don’t call cps on the family#I remember my mum telling me a story of a dad giving his kid a black eye#then when the kid’s teacher asked him where tf he got a black eye from of course the kid told the truth#and the dad had to be tried in court or something#and this whole time my mum is telling me this story it’s like I’m supposed to feel bad for this guy#who cares for his family oh so much but whose life is ruined because of the legal protections we have in place to protect kids 😔#so much discourse abt ‘purity culture’on here but I guess many people forget that in a lot of places in the world especially outside of#the west people are NOT open about sexuality at all#when you add Christianity to the mix real weird shit happens#like why is my mum crying about the fact that I masturbate#at least in her eyes I’m not a virgin….#she literally would rather have me shotgun married to a cis man I could fuck than for me to use a vibrator….#txt#African parents
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who else up having their heart broken by the Prost documentary, btw,
#IDK WHY LIKE. i know what happens but THERES SO MANY MOMENTS THAT JUST MAKE ME SO SAD#a tumblr post will never be enough for me to express everything I want to say but like#idk I’m obviously biased but it’s been thirty years can we stop no nuance observing alain prost circa 1988-89 itgfjfkfkfjd#like i think definitely if nothing else we should look at some of his off track behaviour#as a reflection of some of the stuff he went thru when he was in Renault ya know#even he wouldn’t say he did everything perfectly n that he’s faultless so I won’t#but it does annoy me that even 30 years later people still act like ayrton was perfectly reasonable and shouldn’t be blamed for any of it#because oh so n so reason from off track or whatever#and then can’t see that like….the very same reasons can apply to many of prost’s actions too#ANYWAYS apart from that (how sad it is making me for alain and how much he went through) I am rlly enjoying it#it’s very beautifully done and although it is obviously biased / there’s a few things I wish they dug into more so far#I don’t rlly mind especially since from one angle it’s like I’ve seen sm stuff biased towards ayrton atp on that especially#that having this be kinda alains biased version doesn’t bother me since it feels like it’s just making it more level#also:#alain prost i love you 🥰🥰🥰#just because it’s making me feel even more strongly on that front#probably missed a million things I want to say but 🤷♀️#alain prost#f1#prost documentary
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thinking about glimmer and how she can weaponize building good relationships with others and her ability to endear herself to others to her advantage in the games !!!!!!!
#my baby!!!!!#like sometimes kindness is instinctual with no ulterior motive but other times she can get friendly with others only to stab them in the fr#front*#never in the back because career tribute culture considers that a disgrace!!! it's weak!!!!!!!#and like I know she's smart i *know* she is but d1 tributes especially women have to conform themselves to the expectation archetype#so that the capitol can like see this dumb beautiful violent blonde and then be violently misogynistic and exploit her#also what happens to finnick and cash and presumably most D1 victors is like yet another way to dehumanise them too#to keep up the narrative that they're like subhuman and savages and not real people with wants and needs#because that would make them complex capable of both good and evil but the capitol needs to believe district peeps are bloodthirsty monster#idk why I rambled in the tags about that lmao bringing it back to Glimmer anyways
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6f37df791796d8a2c497ca736f84da5c/1b2712db779a4548-5d/s640x960/7fc3f76da63d6eaecfa311b3c96ba69ab7d49225.jpg)
2024 reads / storygraph
The Jinn-Bot of Shantiport
set in a cyberpunk Calcutta-inspired city, loosely inspired by Aladdin
chaotic monkey bot who wants to fight in underground mecha/bot tournaments and leave to become a space hero
his human sister, the daughter of failed revolutionaries who has been working her whole life to free their city from oppression and inequality, especially with the recent rumors that their planet is scheduled for destruction
and an old unearthed bot whose function is to observe & record the story of a client who meets the siblings and quickly becomes involved in their lives
and a treasure hunt to find an old and powerful piece of alien tech that has the power to radically change their city
#The Jinn-Bot of Shantiport#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#I really loved this#a little robot with a big personality? TWO of them? im in.#The pacing is a bit weird - the first half could honestly be a contained novella. the second half is a bit all over the place#But I’m ultimately glad to have that extra more complex part of the story#it’s like very action packed with a few dense moments especially like the infodumps about what Lina / her mother’s deal is.#which kinda makes sense on a technical level (Moku learning this all at once) but also I definitely felt a bit confused at why/how some of#the stuff that was going on was happening#I did also find every now and then weirdly worded prose took me out of it? but I can look past that#I felt the side romance was random and weird. I felt like it did a disservice to her otherwise complex character to have her just forget#her goals and values because Hot Man?#idk. it’s lampshaded a bit by being viewed through the POV who also thinks it is weird and makes no sense#but they still get together again in the end…. I would have preferred if they didn’t.#that's mostly complaints LOL but the world is so rich and interesting and i love robots that are little shits (affectionate)#queer books
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"i miss drunk kane" yeah uh considering the shit that he'd fucking get into whenever alcohol was involved, I'd rather NOT people miss that era, actually!
#patrick kane#pkaneposting#song:just chatting#song:serious#i don't know what truly happened that day in madison (none of us do)#but that alone should be enough proof on why we uh.. probably shouldn't be celebrating his drunken days#i've seen multiple folks say he's stopped drinking (or atleast limits it)#idk how true it is but if it is true good for him honestly#and because ik someone's gonna try and twist this: I'm not saying alcohol is bad or evil#but alcoholism probably isn't something to celebrate#alcohol tw#<-forgot to tag that. my bad yall#mild edit because apparently this needs to be said: this isn't an anti-kane post nor am i saying he's evil#but he's definitely no saint and i don't want people glorifying his drunken self- especially when it's rumored he has (had?) alcohol issues#and im not going to pretend that he hasnt done inexcusable things; he has.#and just because those behaviors were 'a long time ago' doesn't make it any less wrong
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hey so do you think wtv keiko had to deal with growing up with yusuke could be considered a type of parentification
#god chapters where barely anything happens except a character's realization about things can be hard ...#im writing another keiko pov chapter and it's hard because well!!#keiko was never really a main focus in the series and as time goes on she gets even less of a focus so i have to fill in these spots#in her personality and views that aren't really explored. im taking a lot of liberties lets say#and idek if it's gonna read as in character cos of that#anyway im tryna say that like. pre series keiko was basically this presence in yusuke's life and he saw her as a pain but he cared#she was there to scold him and cajole him into going to his classes and she was his only friend#now we know atsuko was negligent and idk how involved the yukimuras were in his life but i feel like keiko#whether directly or indirectly was given this duty like you have to keep him outta trouble#you're smart you're mature he needs someone like you. this responsibility just kind of put on her before she can understand the weight of i#and she can't really comprehend that weight until it's abruptly taken from her. yusuke dies and there's no one to shepherd#i feel like keiko should get to be mad about this. this realization of the nature of their dynamic. keiko planning things around yusuke#who's never done that in his life. not because he's purposely being thoughtless but bc he was never the one to have to plan#to think about what their future looks like. he just kinda drifted along and keiko tried to do damage control. it wasn't fair#yusuke is keeping secrets from her she is scared of high school and that he'll die again without her knowing why and it's unfair#so she should get to be mad also because girls getting to be mad is one of my favorite things 👍🏼#the realization that yusuke won't be lost without her so she shouldn't hinge her life on the expectation that he will be#she worries about yusuke a lot i think. especially after he comes back from the dead. and i think kuwa's presence would help ease that#dread in her heart. it doesn't have to be just me. there's someone who can be there with him always and it doesn't have to be me#the guilty relief of not having to be the sacrifice. but kuwa doesn't mind so maybe it's okay this way#idk just rambles about my fic while i puzzle out how to word it#character analysis#yukimura keiko#yu yu hakusho
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