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certifiedposeidonhater · 16 days ago

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PERCY JACKSON HEADCANONS!!

this is part 2! hope you guys enjoy! 💙

1. Percy took a psychology class in school and he really liked it. It was the first class he got an A in. The teacher was amazing too. One of the only teachers who really believed in Percy. And Percy profited from it. (He was good. He was really good.)

2. He’s AMAZING at card games and board games (no one else likes playing with him because he always wins (except for trivial pursuit; Annabeth always wins that one.)) And chess. He is AMAZING at chess. He is also super competitive when it comes to board games and card games. Like wayyyy too competitive. It’s a problem.

3. There was a group of older boys in his apartment building that he would hang out with sometimes. They weren’t the best people but they helped him clean up cuts and bruises he got from G*be and looked out for him. Think The Outsiders type thing maybe. He would rather be with them than be alone on the streets as an elementary school kid.

4. He tried his first cigarette when he was 9. A couple of older boys in his apartment lifted a pack and gave him one.

5. Percy has a crazy irrational fear and hatred of snakes (bc Medusa)

6. He has a GREAT intuition. Peter-tingle level great.

7. One time he accidentally led a girl on for over 3 months bc he didn’t realize she was flirting with him and he was accidentally kind of flirting back and then she found out he had a girlfriend and it was a whole thing.

8. He has a lot of scars from G*be throwing beer bottles at him. There’s a specific scar on his upper cheek from one that he always lies and says was from the minotaur. Only Grover and Chiron remember that he had that scar long before the minotaur. They never mention it though.

9. He’s super good at learning new languages because the sea stretches so far and connects everybody that it’s a representation of the ocean’s versatility? It’s just a Poseidon thing. He gets semi-conversational and then the rest just magically comes to him. It helped him pick up on Italian and Ancient Greek when he was younger. And it helped him learn Latin when he was at New Rome.

10. Languages: He knows some Italian (mostly curse words) from G*be and Nico, Ancient Greek, Greek, Latin, Spanish, and Portuguese (bc I think him and Sally are either Hispanic or Portuguese.) He also started learning French before the Battle of Manhattan bc Silena was teaching him but he gave up on it after she died. He took it up again when he was in college. He also knows some Russian (because he was involved with the mafia for a bit) and Arabic (because he got bored and decided to learn it from a neighbor when he was a kid.)

11. He has really bad depressive episodes. Only Annabeth, Grover, and his mom can get him out of them. (Beckendorf used to be able to but…yk.)

12. He desperately needs things to be clean (but not necessarily tidy) bc of all the years G*be made his room and apartment super disgusting and dirty. He’s such a clean freak. He gets annoyed and stressed out if somebody sits in/on his bed in their outside clothes. He has people take their shoes off at the door. He does the dishes as soon as they’re there (unless he’s depressed. Then he doesn’t have the energy.) He obsessively cleans his apartment daily. He CANNOT handle his place being dirty.

13. Sally grew up semi-religious and she got this fancy antique cross necklace from her mom before her mom died. It’s the only thing she’s got left of her parents. She wore it all the time because it made her feel closer to her parents. When Percy was a kid, he would take it from her jewelry box while she was at work bc it made him feel closer to her. It made him feel safe. Sally realized this and gave it to him on his birthday one year. He still has it to this day and he wears it all the time under his shirt to remind him of his roots and his childhood; to remind him of his mom.

14. He is OBSESSED with blue takis. Frank got him a ginormous bag for his birthday and Percy LOVED it.

15. He is constantly cold. It could be 80° degrees outside and he could be wearing sweats and a sweatshirt and STILL be chilly. It’s a kind of chill and cold that will never leave his bones.

16. He can fall asleep a n y w h e r e. In the middle of a restaurant, on the grass in the strawberry fields, in a bar stool, literally anywhere. But, he has to have some sort of sound in the background, it can’t be too quiet. In New Rome, he typically turns on some music or movie/tv show to provide some noise.

17. He sleeps to escape his problems, but sleeping usually doesn’t help. That makes him oversleep a lot.

18. He’s constantly exhausted, no matter how much sleep he gets. That contributes to the oversleeping. He could sleep for 12 hours and still be exhausted an hour after waking up.

19. He’s a super good driver

20. He doesn’t like cops. When he was younger, he and one of his friends were walking in the street (maybe or maybe not spray painting the side of a building.) They heard sirens and starting running. But then his friend was shot and killed 5 times by a cop in the street. Safe to say that really traumatized Percy. He looks over his shoulder and tenses up astronomically whenever he hears sirens. The only person who knows about it is Grover.

21. He uses his hands a lot when he talks

22. He HATES the phrase chef’s kiss. He doesn’t have a reason, he just doesn’t like it.

23. Silena let him borrow her lighter before the Battle of Manhattan (he needed it for some reason.) He still has it bc she died before he got the chance to give it back. He never has the heart to use it though.

24. He doesn’t have a middle name. He was never given one. So whenever Annabeth or Sally is mad at him, they just make up a new middle name for him on the spot. But eventually they ran out of good names so they just started using random words. e.g. “Perseus Aeneas Jackson” or “Perseus Soliloquy Jackson” or “Perseus Prevalence Jackson.” Thalia once called him “Perseus Mistake Jackson” and they started fighting.

25. G*be used to rub his mouth a lot, it was like a stress tic or a drunk tic or something but he did it a lot. Now Percy does it whenever he’s tired or stressed, but he tries to stop cs he hates himself (even more) for doing anything related to G*be. But focusing on it just makes him do it more.

26. When he’s upset he touches his head and face a lot. He also covers his stomach.

27. When he’s happy, he messes with his hair and hands a lot

28. He loves snow and rain to an abnormal degree

29. He used to call Beckendorf “Beck” and “Becky”

30. LOVES hugs

31. His love language is physical touch so he’s super physically affectionate with anyone he loves including his friends and family as long as they’re comfortable with it (e.g. hugs, holding hands, kisses on cheek and forehead, sitting close tg, that kinda stuff.)

32. As much as he hates it, a little part of him will always resent his mom for staying with G*be. (he will never admit it to anyone.) He, obviously, completely understands why Sally did what she did. He understands that she was protecting him, but a little part of him is still that 6 yo boy who doesn’t understand why his mom won’t leave their abusive stepdad. He can’t help but blame her a little. Logically, he completely understands that she was trying her best; that she was still a child. But that doesn’t change the fact that she wasn’t there and she put him in that situation. Yes, she was a child, and no, he doesn’t blame her necessarily, but the slight resentment is still there. He was a kid too. He needed somebody to blame. He needed a stable, safe place to live. He will never bring it up or mention it to ANYBODY. EVER. That is one of the secrets that he will forever keep to himself.

Part 2. Hope you guys enjoy!

#percy jackson #heroes of olympus #trials of apollo #percy jackson and the olympians #pjo hoo toa #pjo #percy jackson defense squad #percy jackson headcanon #percy jackson fandom #percy pjo

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dwobbitfromtheshire · 1 year ago

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The Turkey Baster Experiment

Summary: Her cousin just had a baby via turkey baster, supposedly. Robin had to find out if it actually works. Based on this.

A continuation of me cleaning out my drafts.

1990, Chicago, Illinois

The Rockie Harrison Apartment (named in combination of all of their names)

It was Robin and Eddie's day off of work, so they were busy lounging in their pajamas watching Scooby-Doo. Their partners hadn't been so lucky. Steve was working as a middle school teacher, so of course, he didn't have a day off during the week. Vickie was working in a library at a different school, unfortunately, while she worked on also publishing her own book. Eddie worked as a mechanic. Robin worked at a bakery while also tutoring kids with their Spanish and French on the side. Some of them were rich kids, so occasionally, she could afford to take a few days off like she was now.

"You're such a Velma," Eddie said with a shake of his curls.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Robin said. "Velma is very cute."

"That would make Vickie Daphne?" Eddie asked.

"Duh, she can be such a Daphne sometimes," Robin grinned fondly.

"Steve is such a Fred," Eddie sighed dreamily.

"You're definitely a Shaggy," she said. "And the kids are definitely all Scooby."

"Robin. . .I'm feeling that empty nest thingy again!" Eddie exclaimed and pouted.

"It has been almost a year since they've graduated, and we moved here. Weeks since they've called us. It's not like we practically raised them or anything," Robin pouted. "Do you think they've forgotten about us?"

After the kids graduated high school, Steve and Robin decided to move to Chicago with their partners, who were happy to move anywhere as long as it wasn't Hawkins. It was in Chicago that they found a lovely abandoned old firehouse. It took some TLC, but it was liveable, and it housed them all perfectly. Plus, Eddie loved the pole that went down to the first floor, specifically when Steve used it as a stripper pole. Vickie and Robin had vowed never to use it once they learned what they did with it.

"Rob, they're in college now. El, Lucas, and Max are starting this new relationship. Will and Mike are still dancing around each other since Will broke up with Gareth. They're probably really busy," Eddie shrugged and then paused to wail, "They have forgotten about us!"

Suddenly, the phone rang, and Robin nearly broke her neck, jumping over the back of the couch to answer it.

"Oh, hey, mom," Robin said.

Eddie sighed and crossed his arms, pouting in his seat.

"Darn kids," Eddie muttered.

He focused on the show as Robin talked with her mother. Occasionally, he lifted his head when he heard Robin gasp about something. When the phone call was done, the episode of Scooby-Doo was finished, and another one was starting.

"What was that about?" Eddie asked Robin.

"My cousin finally had a baby. Although she didn't tell anyone that she was pregnant and it's crazy how she got pregnant in the first place," Robin said.

"Not the normal way?" Eddie asked in surprise.

"Well, she and her husband have been trying to have a baby for a while, but it hasn't happened, so she decided to take matters into her own hands," Robin said.

"She fucked another guy?!" Eddie gasped.

"Nope," she said.

"She fucked another girl?" Eddie asked in confusion.

"Dingus! No! She used a turkey baster and get this: she didn't use her husband's sperm to do it. She used his brother's!" Robin exclaimed.

"There's no fucking way," Eddie scoffed.

"She did. Her husband only found out because he went to the doctor and discovered he couldn't have kids," she said. "She told him the truth when he confronted her."

"No, not that. There's no way she got pregnant using a turkey baster," Eddie said.

"She did!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Didn't."

"Did."

"Didn't!"

"I'll prove it," Robin said.

"Fucking how?" Eddie asked.

"You have a turkey baster of your own. You should be able to understand the concept of how she did it," Robin said, narrowing her eyes at him.

"No, I mean how the fuck are you going to prove it?" Eddie asked.

"Well, we have a turkey baster, and I happen to be ovulating," Robin said.

"Okay, so what happens if you do get pregnant?" Eddie asked.

"Then you get a baby like you and Steve have been talking about," Robin said. "Although Vickie's been kind of broody lately too."

"So, this kid would have two moms and two dads?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah," Robin said.

"This kid is either going to be the queerest kid ever, or we're all so queer that they're going to be the straightest person alive," Eddie snickered.

"Either way, because of us, they'll be the fast talking son in the west," Robin said.

"It could be a girl," Eddie said.

"No, it's play on words for - never mind. Are we doing this or not?" Robin asked.

"Hmm, maybe Steve and Vickie are right. Maybe we shouldn't hang out without them," Eddie said.

"Coward," Robin said.

Eddie and Robin stared at each other for a while. Eddie glared at her.

"Do it," Eddie said.

"You're up first, big guy," Robin said.

"Right."

Robin gave him a cup and shoved him into the bathroom. She waited rather impatiently outside the door. A couple of minutes later, she heard him groan in frustration.

"Problems? Just think about Steve at the beach when he ate that vanilla ice cream cone, and it started dripping into his sweaty, hairy beast of a chest, but instead of you gawking at him like an idiot, you reach over and start licking - "

"Okay, it's up! Stop helping!" Eddie shrieked.

Eddie glared at her when he walked out of the room and handed her the cup. She took it, and the turkey baster into the restroom, her head held high. He leaned against the wall, smirking when he heard Robin complain loudly.

"Well, if I didn't know I was a lesbian before this, this is definitely what would turn me. Disgusting!" Robin exclaimed.

"I've heard no complaints from Steve when he swallows!" Eddie exclaimed cheerfully.

"Gah!" Robin exclaimed as she came out of the bathroom. "It's done."

"Now what?" He asked.

"Now we wait," Robin said.

She threw herself down on the couch, turned herself upside down, and threw her legs over the back of the couch.

"What are you doing?" Eddie asked.

"Helping your little guys find their way," Robin said. "Plus, it's a cool way to watch Scooby-Doo."

Eddie shrugged and copied what she did.

"Now, we wait," Eddie said.

An uncertain amount of weeks later. . .

Eddie was alone in the apartment while Vickie took Robin to a doctor's appointment. Steve was at work. Eddie was working on writing music when the door to the apartment burst open. Vickie stared at Eddie while Robin stood nervously behind her.

"Did you get my girlfriend pregnant?" Vickie asked.

"It was her idea! She seduced me!" Eddie said.

"How?!" Vickie asked.

"She called me a coward!" He exclaimed.

Vickie giggled and threw herself at him, hugging him tightly.

"It's hard to stay mad at the mother and father of my child even if it was reckless of you guys," Vickie laughed again. "Just wait until Steve comes home."

"Oh God, Steve," Eddie realized, his face pale.

Eddie waited around nervously for Steve to come home. When he finally did, he walked in with a smile on his face. Oh good, he had a decent day. . . It was a decent day that Eddie was probably about to ruin. He walked up to Steve, greeting him with a tight hug and a kiss. He snuggled into Steve’s side, his cheek pressed against his. Eddie traced patterns in his chest.

"Hi," Steve said, looking at him in confusion.

"So, how mad would you be at me if I got your platonic soulmate pregnant?" Eddie asked.

"What is this now?" Steve asked with wide eyes.

"Robin's cousin got pregnant by turkey baster, and I called bullshit on that, then Robin wanted to prove it. I jerked off into a cup, and Robin squirted it up her hoo-ha with the turkey baster. Then, several weeks later, here we are," Eddie said and paused. "So, how was your day, sweetheart?"

Steve sighed and rubbed his face with his hands, trying to wrap his head around Eddie's ridiculous description of the situation. He walked into the kitchen, grabbed a beer from the fridge, and plopped down at the table.

"So, how are you feeling about this?" Steve asked Vickie and Robin.

"Excited," Vickie grinned. "We're all going to be parents."

"So, all four of us, huh?" Steve asked.

"Yes," Robin said.

"We're having a baby," he said softly, and then he grinned. "We're having a baby!"

"Three bisexuals, a lesbian, and a baby!" Eddie exclaimed, and they all looked at him. "What? Spock directed that film."

Steve laughed, pulled him into his lap, and kissed him.

"I'm happy this happened, but maybe next time you want to get Robin pregnant, maybe get all of us involved," Steve grinned.

"Hey, I was just trying to prove Robin wrong," Eddie said and smiled softly. "I'm glad I was the one who was wrong."

"I just realized this baby is going to part Robin and Eddie," Steve said.

"Oh god!" Vickie laughed.

"Hey! You guys are supposed to love us!" Eddie exclaimed.

"This baby is going to kick the shit out of me, aren't they?" Robin asked, holding her stomach.

Several months later. . . after many shenanigans during which Robin discovered that she could use Steve and Eddie as her willing puppets. . .

"Wednesday, huh?" Steve asked as he held the baby in his arms.

"You said we couldn't name her after a Scooby-Doo character," Eddie said defensively.

"Besides, you always said you love Wednesday because she reminds you of Max," Robin said.

"I'm not complaining, I love the name," Steve said grinning.

Wednesday Elizabeth Munson-Buckley had started arriving sometime during the middle of the night, much to Robin's annoyance. She had been busy sleeping. Wednesday had arrived that afternoon, surrounded by doctors and all of her parents. Now, here they were in Robin's hospital room, with Eddie and Vickie cooing over Steve’s shoulder.

"You did great, baby," Vickie said tearfully. "She's beautiful."

Vickie kissed Robin deeply before going back to gazing at the baby.

"You want to go next, don't you?" Robin asked her girlfriend.

"What?" Vickie asked.

"If we ever decide to give Wednesday a sibling, you want to be the one that's pregnant, don't you?" She asked in amusement.

"Ooh, both her and Steve could go next," Eddie said.

"Let's just see how this one goes," Steve said, laughing. "But probably."

"Oh, I called Uncle Wayne. He cried like, well, a baby when I told him I wanted to give her a w name in honor of him. He's going to call everyone else and let them know. So, we're probably going to have a full house sometime in the next few days," Eddie said.

Steve grinned and passed the baby back off to Robin. She smiled and stroked the top of Wednesday's head.

"Oh, I want her to have the whole world," Robin said.

"So, you want her to be an evil super villain hellbent on world domination?" Eddie asked.

"It's what she deserves," she said.

"She'll succeed where men have failed," Eddie said proudly.

"Yeah, that's a no," Steve scoffed.

"We're just keeping her options open, Stevie," Eddie said.

"It's not set in stone," Robin said. "We're just letting her know that we'll love her no matter what."

"I'm not supporting our daughter becoming a super villain," Vickie laughed.

"I guess we know who the fun parents are," Eddie said.

It certainly wasn't an everyday situation, and most people would call it abnormal, but to the four of them and the people they loved, it wasn't so strange. Wednesday would grow up to be well loved with four supportive parents and with an extended family to match. Stranger things have happened than a child growing up loved and isn't that the most important thing of all. . . That the child was loved?

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