#entry13

[kittsu-and-company]

[ > Entry13.LetsatsiMarisolis ]

[ obtaining file ‘Entry13.LetsatsiMarisolis’ ]

[ “He was always enamored with theatre, that one. Even when nobody was watching, he’d make props and practice monologues, wearing masks that eventually became indistinguishable from his own face.

He detested the family. He thought that if we didn’t know who he was under the masks, if we were caught in a web of lies and manipulation he was intent on weaving, that he would be safe from the blessing.

He didn’t foresee that his obsession would consume him.

He forgot who he was under all that acting long before he made his debut, running from home and joining a traveling group of entertainers. They demanded his facade to be dropped, but how could someone ever drop their own face?

They grew suspicious over time, and Letsatsi payed for his theatrics with his life. A drunken argument turned into a full brawl, and the family found his body buried in a ditch, his previous companions having turned on him.

And so, Letsatsi Marisolis’ act has come to its conclusion.” ]

[mythos-under-the-sun]

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[dry-soliloquies]

Looking back, it has only been more than a month since my last blog post. But to me, it felt longer than that. Even though, I did realize that days pass by quickly and even before I knew it, a month has already passed.

How come I came into that realization from a different point of view now?

Well, it’s because I’m working. For over a month now.

Crazy. I know.

I just found myself working under a national government agency, which I dreamed of after getting my civil service eligibility; and working in Manila which I never thought about even when I was in college and was choosing schools. But here I am now. Here I am.

So far, my work has been pretty good. I have good people around me who are mostly in their 50s or 60s which is pretty great since it feels like having grandparents around me. I also have a new officemate who I could relate to even though she’s 7 years older than me.

But with this comes anxiety as well. Like knowing that this is it. I’m now a working adult with responsibilities. As soon as I get my first paycheck, I will have to contribute to our household and save some for myself. But that’s not a major part of why I feel anxious.

It’s about the Individual Performance Commitment Review which I need to pass every 3 months now since I’m still a regular, then every 6 months if or when I get to be officially regular at my job post.

It’s scary. It’s like an exam. It’s like needing to get that 4.00 GPA if I want to stay in the program.

And of course, me being my little anxious self, questions if I could do this. If I could achieve what is expected of me. If I could.

If I really could...

[spes-elpis]

8/05/2021

i painted the entire kitchen ceiling and walls today! pretty proud of myself for actually doing it and not just saying it. the original walls and ceiling were a tan-ish almond-ish light beige-y color. the house is eighties with formally white color carpets and aslant tall ceiling on one half of the house that is such a waste of space. but painting the kitchen white and i think ill be painting the cabinets a dark olive green. and then Mac will be installing a nice (fake) wood floor.

last night i had a kinda bad dream. so not really bad nor was it a nightmare, it just kinda sucked. i was getting bagged on by my whole family. just comments and judgements about me and everything about me. i feel like i have to be this perfect thing for everyone and if i deviate, even a little bit, im a selfish bitch. but that's how i felt a lot when i was younger. where as now, i realize i don't care because it really doesn't matter and it doesn't make any sense to let others dictate everything about you and your own world and how you live. Mac has really helped me realize this for myself. instead of thinking oh i shouldn't be like this” or “oh i have to do that or else they will blah blah��� i should instead think “its okay that i don't agree with her” or “its okay to say no i don't want to do that”. so that weird and suckish dream i had is kinda funny being awake. though im still not immune to hurt feelings from being verbally picked on everything about me. i can at least move forward and i can be happy and okay with MY choices and MY actions.

[frankiescolorpics]

Frans Lanting -

“This exhibition, Into Africa, was produced by the National Geographic Society with support from the World Wildlife Fund. It was launched at the Smithsonian’s National Museum of Natural History in Washington, D.C., where it was on display for more than a year and was seen by more than three million visitors.”

http://lanting.com/projects/into-africa/

[denlergoldbergwise]

Interview with a Music Teacher

My mom is a music Teacher at Hendrick Hudson High School, so i decided to get some wisdom from her on how to be the best music Teacher I can. I asked her "What are the top ten things you would tell a new Music Teacher" and she said this:

1- Stay ahead of all your work

2- Always be professional

3-Love your students and realize they are real people with feelings

4-Providing a good experience for the choir is better than making the choir sound great

5-Admit it if youre wrong and own up to your mistakes

6-Stay Incredibly organized with paperwork and music

7-Develop good relationship with collegues and bosses

8-Be a role model for students

9-Stay current and up to date with education trends and new music

10-Be passionate about what you do because it will rub off on your students

[a-witch-s-scrapbook]

#LikeAGirl

I chose this campaign, as I have talked about it in other classes, and have a strong opinion about it. I don’t like this campaign, and feel as if it does more harm than good. It makes a slogan that is usually used as an insult to women, like a girl, and tries to make it an empowerment slogan. In my opinion though, it makes it come off as lifting up women in a way that doesn’t make them equal. We don’t tell a boy that he’s doing something like a man, or try to use it in the same context for transgendered people. To make it equal, I think it should be more about, well, doing something that is human, that way it applies to everyone that watches the commercial. Or, just try and get rid of it in the first place, making it not an insult anymore, but just getting rid of it. The term is very gendered and stereotyping. As I learned in my social psychology class, stereotypes don’t always have to be negative, but they can still harm people. The #LikeAGirl campaign does more harm than good, keeping its heavily gendered background, even in its revision, and excludes any boy, or anyone who identifies as a boy, or even anyone who doesn’t align with the binary gendered spectrum.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjJQBjWYDTs

[wheretheunseenlies]

190904 Poem Diary // Entry 13

There you are, stood by me

Your touches burnt my skin

Those eyes give me shivers

Caged; don’t wanna be free

Turned around I saw you

Vulnerability 

Is all that you could see

Still caged, please don’t free me.

Perhaps you have sensed it

The flame you have started

You would’ve closed your eyes

But no. Just burn me. 

10.50pm

[augustothecreator]

A #teeming of lines. #inktober #inktober2017 #entry13 #forest #tree #ink #micron #branches #art #illustration #moleskin #sketchbook

[sukinyeam]

i xxviii xvii

Babe.. sorry nakatulog ako. ): wala na namang call. Miss na miss na kita.

[justapsychonaut-blog]

Thought catalog first LSD trip

entry 1: feels fucking amazing, lost in the thoughts of cosmos of life playing in the line of ecstasy of spirituality and science oh the beauty between the threads that hold them together. slight tense in my back, though. regardless the contentment with the cynical bastard I am is euphoria on levels I have never experienced, the highest high.

entry 2: may you feel the wonder of all those who came before you and never the fear. the love for my mind grows as I put the laws of the universe together calculate myself without prior knowledge how the great scientific feats may have been accomplished. as newtons ideas are pinnacle to science and wonder may god grant me the intellect, passion, and perseverance to have notions, ideas which propagate into the future with the same tenacity and power but I crave no fame.

entry 3: the highest high just got higher. at this point, I’m surprised I can type, to be honest. lets fucking do this.

entry 4: I have come to loath indifference what is a person who can not engage any emotions or feelings. Even my enemies are better, they engage feelings, be it of hatred. once i engage your emotions the balls are in my court, the wheel in my hands I can stir this relationship into what ever I need it to be, to its demise, a trusted friendship or to the bedroom it is all an art where every emotion engaged, every deception read and every move made must all be done with mathematical precision or else its back to square one. But at that point, you might as well give up because nobody's worth that much energy if you still pursue you better be darn sure they’re worth it (or she could have you by the balls there buddy).

entry 5: alright so our youtube spree started from LSD videos and much later ended at Lil Wayne's 6 foot 7 foot and by far that music video takes it all it shouldn’t be humanely possible to speak that fast and lets be honest even if you can its not like you can exchange any information at that pace and at that point its just rhythmic noises rather than words.

entry 6: the tensioning in my back could be my nervous system being stimulated because this tensioning feeling has a very weird deja vu feeling to it. most definitely its my nervous system every time I indulge in theories of space and time, our existence and belief system it gets tenser and tenser an almost orgasmic feeling if I am honest.

entry 7: I THINK I JUST SAW $#$#$#. THAT GOT WEIRD FAST. hi, im a collection of a billion, billion, billion atoms named $#$#$#.

entry 8: how do I satisfy myself for knowledge for the both beauty of the human mind and cognitions and the ideas of stars and galaxies, bodies of heaven so to speak. life and its wonders truly a mystic seducer. no kind of knowledge is insignificant there's is beauty in everything with mathematical precision. if you wish to indulge in astronomy or psychology do it through your own passion don’t let the arbitrary ideas of majors and minors hold you back. read, read, read, you can hold the knowledge of the universe and its inner workings, the laws that govern everything in motion and not, learn about the human mind how it thinks process and stores data more efficiently than anything we have created and at the same time try to understand what created it, the beauty in that paradox is something I can not put into words. break through the walls of heaven.

entry 9: knowledge what an unquenchable thirst. its beauty in the vastness no matter how deep I indulge in the secrets of the universe and its laws. the human mind and its complexity between every line is a plethora of information and i only wish to learn. to make a difference, propagate ideas through ages just as the great thinkers philosophers and scientist did before me. I am more.

entry 10: what sort of a man would it make me if I never made a difference in someone's life. I wish to be part of the hands which helps push boundaries of human capability.

entry11: being everything I can be is what I strive for it is what ignited the kindle so let this passion not go to waste don’t let this hunger and love for knowledge ever subside. when you feel the flame getting dimmer ignite it through what ever means necessary because that is our life blood and we persevere for are willing to die to keep our flame ever glowing.

entry12: nobody in their right mind would want this much cognition. a pleasure indulged only when in need but never in excess.

entry13: only pleasure that ever indulge in without limit is pushing boundaries of human knowability.

entry14: conceal your thought do not always speak your mind, knowing whats behind feelings and emotions is not a luxury everyone should have.

entry:15 stuck in a loop of being dispensable to this world but living for myself at the same time how do I satisfy my selfish self and give back to this world something as impactful as theologians and thinkers did

entry:16 human iris what a fucking amazing thing with all its intricacies and colors end into a center of deep dark nothingness but a whole world lives behind it. even the collective efforts of van Gogh and Leonardo da vinci would have proved futile to create what nature has perfected over eons.

[lightsbct]

CTEC708 - Studio: PitchedIn BLOG INDEX

ENTRY1 | ENTRY2 | ENTRY3 | ENTRY4 | ENTRY5 | ENTRY6 | ENTRY7 | ENTRY8 | ENTRY9 | ENTRY10 | ENTRY11 | ENTRY12 | ENTRY13 | ENTRY14 | ENTRY15 | ENTRY16 | ENTRY17 |

Extras:

Trash to Treasure prototype 1 Trash to Treasure prototype 2 Miro Board PitchedIn XD video

Reflection

[conntin-blog]

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