#enny summer

[rickyburrinho]

moths

[voilaammayi]

John Watson saying you join me and my companion/colleague/friend/flat mate while the only thing I can think of is oh please cut the bullshit.

Companion is already the gayest word in existence and yet you want to salvage yourself by flat mate in a desperate try of not using roommate which is actually nothing more than just the second gayest word in existence and you and I both know it.

Who do you think you’re fooling John, my beloved sweet summer child, only yourself I’m afraid.

[sanfrankissco]

🐴 🧺 🇺🇸

[tinyferalbeing]

"all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing"

[thaoworra]

The Science Fiction and Fantasy Poetry Association recently released the poems that made it to the finalist stage for consideration for the 2024 Rhysling Awards for Short and Long Speculative Poems of the year. Congratulations to all of the nominees! This will be the 46th year these awards have been conferred!

Short Poems (50 finalists)

Attn: Prime Real Estate Opportunity!, Emily Ruth Verona, Under Her Eye: A Women in Horror Poetry Collection Volume II

The Beauty of Monsters, Angela Liu, Small Wonders 1

The Blight of Kezia, Patricia Gomes, HWA Poetry Showcase X

The Day We All Died, A Little, Lisa Timpf, Radon 5

Deadweight, Jack Cooper, Propel 7

Dear Mars, Susan L. Lin, The Sprawl Mag 1.2

Dispatches from the Dragon's Den, Mary Soon Lee, Star*Line 46.2

Dr. Jekyll, West Ambrose, Thin Veil Press December

First Eclipse: Chang-O and the Jade Hare, Emily Jiang, Uncanny 53

Five of Cups Considers Forgiveness, Ali Trotta, The Deadlands 31

Gods of the Garden, Steven Withrow, Spectral Realms 19

The Goth Girls' Gun Gang, Marisca Pichette, The Dread Machine 3.2

Guiding Star, Tim Jones, Remains to be Told: Dark Tales of Aotearoa, ed. Lee Murray (Clan Destine Press)

Hallucinations Gifted to Me by Heatstroke, Morgan L. Ventura, Banshee 15

hemiplegic migraine as willing human sacrifice, Ennis Rook Bashe, Eternal Haunted Summer Winter Solstice

Hi! I am your Cortical Update!, Mahaila Smith, Star*Line 46.3

How to Make the Animal Perfect?, Linda D. Addison, Weird Tales 100

I Dreamt They Cast a Trans Girl to Give Birth to the Demon, Jennessa Hester, HAD October

Invasive, Marcie Lynn Tentchoff, Polar Starlight 9

kan-da-ka, Nadaa Hussein, Apparition Lit 23

Language as a Form of Breath, Angel Leal, Apparition Lit October

The Lantern of September, Scott Couturier, Spectral Realms 19

Let Us Dream, Myna Chang, Small Wonders 3

The Magician's Foundling, Angel Leal, Heartlines Spec 2

The Man with the Stone Flute, Joshua St. Claire, Abyss & Apex 87

Mass-Market Affair, Casey Aimer, Star*Line 46.4

Mom's Surprise, Francis W. Alexander, Tales from the Moonlit Path June

A Murder of Crows, Alicia Hilton, Ice Queen 11

No One Now Remembers, Geoffrey Landis, Fantasy and Science Fiction Nov./Dec.

orion conquers the sky, Maria Zoccula, On Spec 33.2

Pines in the Wind, Karen Greenbaum-Maya, The Beautiful Leaves (Bamboo Dart Press)

The Poet Responds to an Invitation from the AI on the Moon, T.D. Walker, Radon Journal 5

A Prayer for the Surviving, Marisca Pichette, Haven Speculative 9

Pre-Nuptial, F. J. Bergmann, The Vampiricon (Mind's Eye Publications)

The Problem of Pain, Anna Cates, Eye on the Telescope 49

The Return of the Sauceress, F. J. Bergmann, The Flying Saucer Poetry Review February

Sea Change, David C. Kopaska-Merkel and Ann K. Schwader, Scifaikuest May

Seed of Power, Linda D. Addison, The Book of Witches ed. Jonathan Strahan (Harper Collins)

Sleeping Beauties, Carina Bissett, HWA Poetry Showcase X

Solar Punks, J. D. Harlock, The Dread Machine 3.1

Song of the Last Hour, Samuel A. Betiku, The Deadlands 22

Sphinx, Mary Soon Lee, Asimov's September/October

Storm Watchers (a drabbun), Terrie Leigh Relf, Space & Time

Sunflower Astronaut, Charlie Espinosa, Strange Horizons July

Three Hearts as One, G. O. Clark, Asimov's May/June

Troy, Carolyn Clink, Polar Starlight 12

Twenty-Fifth Wedding Anniversary, John Grey, Medusa's Kitchen September

Under World, Jacqueline West, Carmina Magazine September

Walking in the Starry World, John Philip Johnson, Orion's Belt May

Whispers in Ink, Angela Yuriko Smith, Whispers from Beyond (Crystal Lake Publishing)

Long Poems (25 finalists)

Archivist of a Lost World, Gerri Leen, Eccentric Orbits 4

As the witch burns, Marisca Pichette, Fantasy 87

Brigid the Poet, Adele Gardner, Eternal Haunted Summer Summer Solstice

Coding a Demi-griot (An Olivian Measure), Armoni “Monihymn” Boone, Fiyah 26

Cradling Fish, Laura Ma, Strange Horizons May

Dream Visions, Melissa Ridley Elmes, Eccentric Orbits 4

Eight Dwarfs on Planet X, Avra Margariti, Radon Journal 3

The Giants of Kandahar, Anna Cates, Abyss & Apex 88

How to Haunt a Northern Lake, Lora Gray, Uncanny 55

Impostor Syndrome, Robert Borski, Dreams and Nightmares 124

The Incessant Rain, Rhiannon Owens, Evermore 3

Interrogation About A Monster During Sleep Paralysis, Angela Liu, Strange Horizons November

Little Brown Changeling, Lauren Scharhag, Aphelion 283

A Mere Million Miles from Earth, John C. Mannone, Altered Reality April

Pilot, Akua Lezli Hope, Black Joy Unbound eds. Stephanie Andrea Allen & Lauren Cherelle (BLF Press)

Protocol, Jamie Simpher, Small Wonders 5

Sleep Dragon, Herb Kauderer, The Book of Sleep (Written Image Press)

Slow Dreaming, Herb Kauderer, The Book of Sleep (Written Image Press)

St. Sebastian Goes To Confession, West Ambrose, Mouthfeel 1

Value Measure, Joseph Halden and Rhonda Parrish, Dreams and Nightmares 125

A Weather of My Own Making, Nnadi Samuel, Silver Blade 56

Welcoming the New Girl, Beth Cato, Penumbric October

What You Find at the Center, Elizabeth R McClellan, Haven Spec Magazine 12

The Witch Makes Her To-Do List, Theodora Goss, Uncanny 50

The Year It Changed, David C. Kopaska-Merkel, Star*Line 46.4

Voting for the Rhysling Award begins July 1; a link to the ballot will be sent with the Rhysling Anthology, as well as with the July issue of Star*Line. More information on the Rhysling Award can be found here.

[bubaboos]

oh man...

gonna watch brokeback mountain, wish me luck😗✌🏻

[sparklingcid3r]

darrys internalized homophobia he has for himelf goes crazzzyyy do u have any hc of him in high school with paul and either their convos or inner monologue about how much he wishes he could publicly go out w him?

darry who lives and dies without coming to terms with his sexuality WHO SAID THAT⁉️

- they have the biggest brokeback mountain situationship in the history of situationships

- darry is ennis i fear

- they met freshman year and darry immediately started dating a girl to kill whatever feelings he was having for his new friend

- guess how long it lasted before she broke up with him (physically he was present, emotionally he refused to touch her with a thirty foot pole)

- so darry’s floundering because it didn’t even work, his eyes linger on paul’s lips for a heartbeat too long and he has to wrench himself away when paul gets too close

- it lasts until late sophomore year until they’re at the same party and darry’s drunk and paul’s drunk and the police get called and they’re sprinting away, panting into the sticky summer air and oh, would you look at that they’re making out in paul’s car

- after that, darry’s very easy with letting paul touch him the way their friends do, like jostling his shoulder and slapping his back

- he’s of the belief that what they have won’t last after senior year, so he treats the relationship like it’s his last meal before getting sent to the chair

- until suddenly paul’s bringing forward his hope of going to the same college together, living in the same dorm, and darry’s like “hold up. wait a minute”

- he didn’t mean to get attached the way they both ended up being (this is code for “fall in love” but darry doesn’t want to put two and two together)

- and though ultimately he does love paul, the last thing he wants is to go public with him because he can’t even imagine a world where their love is pure. in his mind it’s wrong, it’s always been wrong, and will always be wrong. but he can’t stop going back for more

- at the same time, he never mourned someone the way he did when he lost paul

darry’s the type of guy to not care abt gay ppl until he’s the gay person in question, then it’s denial, defensiveness, anger. he doesn’t know what’s wrong with him :(

[planetpedri]

angst… angst… angst… (to comfort?) ARDA GÜLER WHEREEE they’ve been dating for quite a bit, but lately she’s been noticing how he’s been pulling back, which causes her to be like hey… so… like are we okay… and he can see how him doing that makes her feel and he just reassures her that they’re fine, it’s just him and his own like, worries, and she’s just there for him OHHHH MY GOD IM SICK. AND YEAH.

A dozen delicate kisses — Arda Güler.

Pairing: Arda Güler x Fem!Reader

Summary: Arda had been growing more distant with you than he ever had in the five months you’ve been dating and your mind had started reeling with possibilities. After a night out you finally gain the courage to ask if you guys were alright, and he decides to make a point to show you just how alright you guys are.

Word count: 468

Disclaimer/s: bit of overthinking/anxieties but other than that! pure fluff <3

A/N: hello enny bear.

The warmth of a summer night drawing to a close envelopes you and Arda while you two make your way back to his car. It was quiet, with only the soft tunes coming from the open door of a super markets open door as you waited for Arda to unlock the doors.

Tapping your feet on the pavement, you let out a huff of air as he lets go of your hand to fish the keys from his pocket. When the beep signals they are unlocked, you quickly climb inside, your mind reeling with thoughts of earlier.

He’d been much more withdrawn tonight than usual, hardly keeping conversation before his eyes drifted away and into whatever thought’s he was having. Thoughts he used to voice aloud, something you’d noticed happening less and less frequently.

Arda, sitting in the drivers seat, turns to you with a frown. You hadn’t even noticed the card hadn’t started. “Aşkım (my love)?” He drawls out quietly, making you turn to face him. “What’s wrong?”

Now or never.

“We… We’re okay, right?” You chew on your cheeks, eyes darting around his face in worry.

Arda’s face scrunches up, “of course we are.” He says sincerely, “why? Did you think we weren’t?”

Guilt consumes you. It’d all been in your head after all. “I’m sorry.. I just.. you’ve been withdrawn and I thought—I don’t know.” Your shoulders slump, “i’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.” Arda smiles sweetly, reaching out his hand to rub your cheek affectionately, “you’re right, i’ve been distant, it’s my fault.”

Your bottom lip juts out, “well, what’s wrong?”

He sighs, his hand dropping from your face to your hands, taking one in his own as he rubs small circles on it. “Just with how much i’ve been busy, I don’t want you to think you’re not just as important to me as my career is, because you are. I don’t want you to think I care about you less or—“

“Arda.” You interrupt, “I would never think that. I was scared you were pulling away because I upset you. I know you care.” A soft chuckle escapes your lips. Pulling his hand to your lips, you leave a soft kiss to his knuckles.

Relief washes over his face, “okay, okay. I’m sorry.” He lets go of your hand, pulling your face closer to his so he can press a dozen delicate kisses all over your face, mumbling a quiet, “I love you” between every one.

Your giggling comes to a halt when he presses two gentle kisses to your lips, ending it with a long, love filled kiss that left you both breathless. Lovesick smiles on your faces when he eventually pulls away, his hands still lingering on your face.

“I love you too.” You finally reply, no more worry in you.

(DTS) @halfwayhearted <3

[journalofanoldsoul]

Couple Dynamics 💕 (Venus Composite Chart) - Part 1

Venus in Aries

🫶 "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" (2005): This action-packed film portrays the fiery passion and competitive energy of an Aries Venus. The movie follows a couple who are both highly skilled assassins, showcasing their intense chemistry and adventurous nature.

🫶 Ross and Rachel from "Friends": Ross and Rachel's on-again, off-again relationship in the TV show "Friends" captures the fiery and passionate dynamic often associated with Venus in Aries. Their love story is filled with ups and downs, reflecting the Aries energy of intensity and impulsiveness.

🫶 Beca and Chloe from "Pitch Perfect": Beca and Chloe's dynamic in the movie series "Pitch Perfect" exemplifies the passionate and competitive nature of Venus in Aries. Their vibrant personalities and shared love for music create an exciting and energetic connection.

Venus in Taurus

🫶 The Notebook" (2004): This classic romantic movie depicts a deep and enduring love story, which resonates with the sensual and romantic nature of Venus in Taurus. The film portrays a couple's strong bond and commitment to each other over time.

🫶 Noah and Allie from "The Notebook": The relationship between Noah and Allie in "The Notebook" showcases the Venus in Taurus qualities of loyalty, stability, and a deep connection that stands the test of time.

🫶 Elio and Oliver from "Call Me by Your Name": Elio and Oliver's tender and sensuous relationship in the movie "Call Me by Your Name" represents the deep emotional connection and sensual intimacy associated with Venus in Taurus. Their story showcases the beauty and depth of a same-sex love affair.

Venus in Gemini

🫶 "500 Days of Summer" (2009): This film explores the complexities of love and relationships, reflecting the duality and intellectual stimulation associated with Venus in Gemini. The story delves into the ups and downs of a romantic connection with its twists and turns.

🫶 Jim and Pam from "The Office": Jim and Pam's relationship in the TV show "The Office" embodies the playful banter, wit, and intellectual connection that is often found with Venus in Gemini. Their journey showcases the importance of communication and shared interests.

🫶 Waverly and Nicole from "Wynonna Earp": Waverly and Nicole's connection in the TV show "Wynonna Earp" embodies the witty banter, intellectual stimulation, and adaptability of Venus in Gemini. Their relationship is characterized by playful conversations, a deep understanding of each other's minds, and the ability to adapt to one another's ever-evolving needs and interests.

Venus in Cancer

🫶 "The Fault in Our Stars" (2014): This heartfelt movie tells the story of two young cancer patients who fall in love. It portrays the emotional depth, vulnerability, and nurturing aspects associated with Venus in Cancer.

🫶 Jack and Rose from "Titanic": The iconic love story of Jack and Rose in the movie "Titanic" captures the tender and emotional connection of Venus in Cancer. Their love transcends societal barriers, and their bond is characterized by emotional support and sacrifice.

🫶 Ennis and Jack from "Brokeback Mountain": The relationship between Ennis and Jack in "Brokeback Mountain" highlights the deep emotional bond, nurturing, and protection associated with Venus in Cancer. Their love story is marked by secrecy, longing, and a profound connection that withstands the test of time.

Venus in Leo

🫶 "Moulin Rouge!" (2001): This visually stunning musical showcases grandiose gestures, creative expression, and passionate love. It reflects the dramatic and theatrical nature of Venus in Leo, where love is expressed with flair and enthusiasm.

🫶 Carrie and Mr. Big from "Sex and the City": Carrie and Mr. Big's relationship in the TV show "Sex and the City" embodies the glamorous and attention-seeking qualities of Venus in Leo. Their love story is filled with ups and downs, but their passion and magnetic attraction are undeniable.

🫶 Patrick and Richie from "Looking": Patrick and Richie's passionate and dramatic relationship in the TV show "Looking" captures the grandiose expressions of love and the fiery energy of Venus in Leo. Their connection is marked by intense chemistry and a desire to be seen and celebrated.

Venus in Virgo

🫶 "Silver Linings Playbook" (2012): This film explores the complexities of human relationships, mental health, and personal growth. It reflects the practicality, attention to detail, and healing potential associated with Venus in Virgo.

🫶 Monica and Chandler from "Friends": Monica and Chandler's relationship in the TV show "Friends" showcases the grounded and supportive nature of Venus in Virgo. They are a couple who deeply care for each other, displaying acts of service and dedication.

🫶 Naomi and Emily from "Skins": Naomi and Emily's relationship in the TV show "Skins" embodies the practicality, loyalty, and healing potential of Venus in Virgo. Their connection is characterized by a supportive and nurturing bond that helps them navigate challenges together.

These recommendations and couple choices are based on the archetypal qualities associated with each Venus sign. While they may not represent an exhaustive list, they serve as examples to illustrate how the energies and themes of each Venus sign can manifest in romantic movies and famous couples. It's important to remember that astrology is a complex and nuanced system, and individual interpretations can vary.

I hope you have enjoyed this selection.

Stay tune for part 2…

xoxo J.

[queerinfilm]

Mike Faist’s Queer Roles:

🎭 Dear Evan Hansen (2014)

Connor Murphy is a highly troubled 17 year old who has only ever felt true happiness in the presence of his best friend, and boyfriend, Miguel before he tragically took his own life.

🎥 Panic (2021-2021)

Dodge Manson is a contestant in the game PANIC, and has been confirmed as bisexual by the author.

🎭 Brokeback Mountain (2023)

Two cowboys, Ennis and Jack, meet on a shepherding job in the summer of ‘63. The two soon develop a powerful bond that threatens their livelihoods.

🎥 Challengers (2024)

World famous tennis players Patrick, Art and Tashi find themselves involved in a toxic love triangle

[nateconnolly]

I'm obsessed with the theory that Jack and Ennis never actually kissed on Brokeback Mountain (in the short story version). That their first kiss was the moment of passion when they find each other again four years later, after they're both married to women.

We know Jack thinks that when they spooned, Ennis did "not then embrace him face to face because he did not want to see or feel that it was Jack he held." We also know that the first time they had sex, Ennis "hauled Jack onto all fours," meaning that Ennis didn't have to look at Jack's face. Jack didn't ask to have sex in this position -- Ennis instinctively, and very very quickly decides that he won't look Jack in the eyes when they have sex.

I just can't believe Ennis would have brought their faces together for a kiss. If they kissed, then Ennis would have had to look at Jack before and after they pulled together.

Their reunion is the absolute greatest turning point in their relationship. On BB Mountain, they're able to tell themselves that it's "a one-shot thing," a summer hookup because there's no women around. But one-shot things don't feel physically ill when they separate. One-shot things don't spend years worrying that they might have left on bad terms.

Ennis kisses Jack and that marks the transition -- they can not longer pretend it's a one-shot thing, and now they have to figure out what it means to be true star-crossed lovers.

[butch--dean]

Thinking about Dean during the Stanford era just before everything went down going to see Brokeback Mountain in theaters. He heard whispers about it but would deny that he knew anything about it if anyone had been around to ask. One night he sneaks into a theatre in a mid-sized town (not so big that it would be busy, not so small that he would stand out). He buys tickets for a different film and sneaks into a late-night showing, and makes sure to sit in the back so he can avoid the judgmental gaze of other patrons (they're not judging you, Dean, they're here for the same reason you are).

Thinking about Dean watching the slow-building yearning and the casual displays of intimacy and affection between Jack and Ennis during their summer ranching. Thinking about how they both go on to get married and have kids but continue to feel so deeply dissatisfied with their lives. Thinking about their reunion 4 years later and a kiss so frenzied that it bruised their noses. Thinking about twenty years of back-and-forth, of yearning for something one of them is too afraid of have. Thinking about the heartbreak of “I wish I knew how to quit you” and “sometimes I miss you so much I can’t hardly stand it” and "it's because of you, Jack, that I'm like this," and "there ain't ever enough time." Thinking about Dean silently breaking down during Ennis' call to Jack's widow, and again when he enters the closet of his lover's childhood bedroom to find a relic of their relationship, hidden away in a dark corner. Private. Loved.

When Dean left the theatre, he was a changed person - heartbroken for something that, in that very moment, he couldn't name within himself. I think that he carries the story with him throughout the series. Eventually, he is able to name that heartbreak - of loving someone so completely but never being able to say it. Of fearing what others would do if they knew, of having someone but never allowing yourself to actually have it.

Of course he sees the comparisons to be made between Cas and him. He sees what his insistence in believing in Cas, even when his gut tells him otherwise, means. He understands what is being left unspoken in long, drawn out gazes and crooked smiles. He knows that their post-death hugs and late nights spent chatting with each other while watching the old westerns that Dean loves mean so much more than they pretend.

I think that over the years, Dean would return to the film and re-mourn the loss of Jack. Over and over, on nights when Sam is out late researching in an archive and Dean knows he has a few hours alone. He has a torrented copy (because he can't risk the physical evidence being found, even after settling into the bunker). I think that Charlie probably downloaded for him, because of course - she knew. Maybe she slipped it in a batch of movies Dean requested from her, with a few of her own added in for good measure. He regrets never having the chance to thank her for that.

After Cas dies and goes to the empty, Dean hangs the jacket with the bloody handprint on the inside of his dresser door. He stands there and thinks about Ennis finding his and Jack's bloody shirts intertwined in a hidden spot in the back of his closet, together, after his death. Dean stands, staring at the jacket, heartbroken. He thinks about loving and losing and never-really-having. Of letting yourself bask in the sun, shining on your face. If he can't have Cas, he wishes that the universe, or Chuck, or whatever, had at least seen fit to have left him with Cas's trench coat to protect on the inside of his stained jacket. But it (or he) didn't, all he has left is the relic of his not-lover's handprint, marked in blood.

[chirpsythismorning]

Just watched Brokeback Mountain for the first time and I need to talk about it.

Throughout the movie, we see Ennis experience a lot of intense discomfort and fear at the idea of being intimate with a man, despite it becoming abundantly clear in the details and based on his actions that that is indeed what he wants. He even admits to Jack that this fear stems from an experience he had at a young age, when his father showed him two men who were presumed to be lovers (they were roommates vibes), murdered and castrated, with him basically using it as a lesson to show Ennis that being gay was wrong and would get you killed.

Jack on the other hand was a little less discomforted or fearful at the idea of being with a man, in that we actually saw him return the following summer to Brokeback Mountain hoping Ennis would be there, only for him to show up alone. We saw how after this he confidently approached a man at the bar hoping to get to know him, only to get rejected and risk getting hate crimed (foreshadowing 😭). And we saw how, over time, Jack’s struggle had more to do with being hurt over Ennis’ unwillingness to commit or even just consider the possibility of them being together long term, even despite the risk of being gay in the 60’s.

Near the end of the film, upon Jack’s death, Ennis discovers from his father that over the past 20 years since they met at Brokeback Mountain, Jack constantly brought it up to his folks, how Ennis, his friend, was going to move up to their ranch and they were going to build a cabin and live together and take over for the family.

Jack was often the one in the moment taking the chances for them to be together. He was the one who mentioned that they could go to Mexico, with Ennis furiously rejecting it saying ‘you know what happens to people like you there??’

But what’s even more painful, is that in this same scene, Ennis’ acknowledges the truth more directly, and why it’s so painful is because it ends up ironically coming true:

Here, Ennis is basically saying that if he decides to be with Jack for real, aka faces his queerness head on, that’s going to be the thing that gets them (Jack) killed. Shortly after this, Jack loses it and has that infamous ass monologue, followed by Ennis breaking down over how it’s Jack’s fault that he’s this way in the first place.

In the end, when Jack dies, Ennis finds out about what happened from Jack’s wife, Lureen Newsome, who said Jack was pumping up a flat out on a backroad when his tire blew up, with the rim of the tire slamming his face, breaking his nose and jaw, and knocking him unconscious on his back. By the time someone drove by on the deserted backroad, he had drowned in his own blood.

The audience might’ve believed this story, if it wasn’t for how rehearsed it sounded coming out of Lureen’s mouth, but it also doesn’t help that images of Jack being hate crimed as his true cause of death are flashing across Ennis’s mind in real time while Lureen is telling him about the ‘accident’.

While it’s left up to interpretation, it’s implied from what his wife and father said, that Jack was hate-crimed by his father in law, with it being covered up.

Broken nose? Broken jaw?… Those are the kinds of wounds someone endures after being beaten up. And if it’s happening to the point of death, then he was essentially beaten to death.

This then fits into what Jack’s father said, because apparently, shortly before he died, he’d told his father he’d found a different friend that was going to come up there to the ranch with him. And so it’s very likely Lureen’s father caught wind of this as his plans to leave neared, leading to his murder (Jack also bitched his father in law tf out in an epic way, which on its own felt unnecessary in the moment, but within the context of this makes a whole lot more sense).

Either way, it seems Jack waited for Ennis to change his mind. 20 years he waited, and when Ennis didn’t, Jack finally moved on with someone else who made an offer of his own years before, only to get murdered just as Ennis feared he would if he decided to live his life authentically.

Ennis initially found out like this, in a postcard that bounced of him inquiring Jack about seeing each other again after that last massive fall out where they had, only for Ennis’s worst fear to be realized:

Nov 7th with deceased stamped across it has me spiraling 😭

Now, obviously Brokeback Mountain is one of the most well known queer films of all time, like there’s no denying that. So it’s fairly easy to assume ST could be taking some inspiration from this film just like they have with hundreds upon hundreds of other films. But especially if they are planning to go the queer route, homage to this film is pretty much guaranteed (there’s also one more reason it might be guaranteed, but I’m saving that for the end 🤣).

Regardless, as you can probably already tell, it’s very easy to see similarities between Ennis with Mike and Jack with Will.

Mike getting the ‘you see Michael? You see what happens?’ treatment from his father, in the first episode in the series, is very Ennis coded in that this is a TV show that follows that up with seasons of Mike pushing Will away from him, with it leading to a boiling point where he says, ‘What did you think? Really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends? That we were just gonna sit in my basement in play games for the rest of our lives?’ with Will responding, ‘Yeah. I guess I did. I really did,’ aka extremely Jack coded.

The really epic thing about this though, is that ST is clearly going on a different journey than Brokeback Mountain did, in that it’s simply subverting the bury your gays trope. While they are acknowledging the risk of being queer in the 80’s, they’re not letting it end ‘realistically’ like many people have insisted it must because that is the only option. And this will be a satisfying ending because it’s coming as a response to all those heartbreaking stories before it that have reinforced this idea that happy endings just aren’t an option for gay people who simply want to be together.

While Ennis and Jack didnt get their happy ending like they wanted, Mike and Will on the other hand 😏

And last but not least, on a more hilariously ironic note, the guy who Jack was going to settle for in the end instead of Ennis, was a guy named Randall Malone, played by none other than David fucking Harbour.

[deuterium51614]

Boueibu Rewatch Part 1

I've been working on transcribing Crunchyroll's subtitles to use on my bluray rips (to be able to watch the Definitive Version™️of Boueibu lol) but I only just started working on the second episode last night.

("Definitive" because of the pink and blue bars with extra text, filters for bright lights and some ghost frames being removed, changes like the summer uniforms, the ED at the end of the first episode, etc.)

So, for my rewatch today I opted back in to the lowest premium tier so I could watch the episodes on the big screen without having to rely on my laptop.

Something to note is that Crunchyroll has changed some subtitles from when it first came out, and I'll bring up the ones I remember. No idea when they were changed, since I tend to watch it offline. (Last time I watched on my TV was 2021, and it was definitely on Crunchyroll because we kept joking about the repetitive car dealership ads, back before they removed the ability to watch Boueibu without a premium membership.)

If they're recent changes, could it be part of the Funimation merger? Or could they be updating subtitles to be closer to an English dub?? How often does Crunchyroll go back in to old shows and make changes, anyway?

Episode One

In En's chikuwabu speech, I could've sworn that they changed the subtitles from "it rejects others and denies its wheat-based origins" (because wasn't the point of the line that it "stays as wheat flour mixed with water," as he says in the previous line?) but apparently it's still there. Maybe I'm thinking of the Funimation subs? (Which used to be available for free on Tubi, but aren't anymore. RIP the Enny/Kinny/Atsu nicknames)

Anyway, something I never noticed before: when Wombat is tackled by Yumoto in the first episode, he's got rice around his mouth.

For the first episode, like I said above the bluray has the OP before the title card and the ED at the end.

During the line "I miss you," it's En on the screen, pointing.

So that, combined with:

the fact En is in the seat behind Kinshirou

you don't know necessarily who Kinshirou is looking at when he turns

it hasn't been established yet that the Defense Club wears their Battle Lover colors for casual clothes (because of the flashback in the ED)

...it could be said that up until the previews for episode four, the viewer could assume Kinshirou was childhood friends with En, and he's mad at Atsushi for taking him away. And now I'm thinking of a different version/cut of Boueibu where the episode four flashback didn't happen (or Atsushi's face isn't shown), and it's a big twist that the viewer thinks En was the childhood friend for the entire show until the final battle.

Episode Two

This is where I noticed the most changes in subtitles (because I was just transcribing it last night). Entire lines are different! Some have big effects on the tone or meaning, while others are easily swapped. (There's so many I'm literally just watching them side by side now, and also skipping some of them.)

Io's line "Anyway, can we ask Wombat about the aftermath now?" has become "Anyway, can we talk about why Wombat appears to be dead now?"

En's line "We can't take these things off, can we?" became "These things won't come off."

Tawarayama's "Now you shall not worry" became "Now you need not worry."

Ryuu's "'Shall' in this day and age..." is "'Need not' in this day and age..."

Atsushi's "I can't believe you're touching him, Yumoto." -> "I don't know how you can touch him, Yumoto."

Wombat's "It's a 'joint life'!" -> "We are 'living jointly'!"

Atsushi's "I've never heard that one before..." -> "I don't know where you pulled that one from..."

Wombat's "I had no choice but to run at full speed!" -> I had no choice but to run with all my might!"

"You made it done."/"Truly done." -> "You did it, all right."/"Really did it." (I like this one because it matches the previous lines "You did it, huh?"/"You sure did it.")

"Am I to shoulder all the responsibility by myself?" -> "Is the responsibility truly mine alone to bear?"

En's "You're a creepy guy." -> "You're so creepy."

Ryuu's "That's fishy!" became "Talk about corrupt!"

"It's okay to have various definitions of love." -> "It's fine that everyone has his own definition of love."

Ibushi's "rustling the leaves" became "rustling young leaves," though I think that's something that was in later episodes' subs and they just went back and made it consistent.

The chopstick monster's "Multiply!" became "Multiply further!"

"That's a more [insignificant -> unintelligible] reason than I was expecting."

"It's true that it's nice to have a matching set." -> "It's true that it feels more complete that way."

"I knew they'd react like that." -> "They're right to react like that." (They made it funnier lol)

"Your images and voices have been altered to protect your [privacy -> personal information]."

Wario's "Green..." -> "Eco-friendly." (Funimation subs iirc had him say "Eco.")

Episode Three

Don't think there were any changes to the subtitles, though it's been a while since I've watched the version I have offline.

My dad came into the room for parts of this episode. "Talking teddy bears?" he asked when Wombat was sitting on the desks, raising his hand. Said Ryuu looked more like a princess than a prince. And when everyone was falling in love with the monster: "Bestiality??" Also commented that he felt like he was losing brain cells watching it, and kept giving me concerned glances lol

I've always thought it was funny how the guys' plan was to get more votes for Ryuu so he could beat Akoya, but...two of their plans don't involve getting votes for him. Maybe the wrestler and urinal guy were going to vote for Akoya before they were convinced otherwise? That's the only way it makes sense for me.

[nopefer-art-tu]

so i was thinking abt the old brokeback mountain forum threads i had stumbled upon last yr and i remember coming across a very lengthy one where people were debating the nature of ennis and jack's relationship during their days on brokeback mountain. specifically, people were debating about whether or not ennis and jack kissed at all during those first few months of friendship and fucking.

i know what y'all may be thinking: but nickie, didn't they literally kiss, like, super passionate style during the unfamous second-night-in-the-tent (or SNIT, as the BetterMost forum users dubbed it) scene?

but see, the thing is that in the original short story Annie Proulx never mentioned them kissing during their time on the mountain. In fact, the first (and only) time kissing is mentioned is during their reunion. In an interview, Ang Lee had said that the whole SNIT scene was written into the film to help audiences better understand the budding passion and love between Ennis and Jack. Otherwise, they felt viewers wouldn't quite get the depth of feelings that they had for each other, and thought they would've been lost as to why it hurt them both so bad to be separated earlier than they'd anticipated.

of course i love the idea that they eased into intimacy so early on in their relationship that they made out a ton while herding on the mountains, but imo, it's also kind of interesting to think about the reunion scene being their first kiss.

in her Story to Screenplay book essay, Annie Proulx said that ranchers would often hire two guys to tend a flock together so that they could 'poke each other' on the lonesome days in the mountains. In some ways, Ennis and Jack fucking was a normal and anticipated part of the job—a 'one-shot thing' that would occur simply due to circumstance. She said what was unusual about Ennis and Jack's case is that the two had fallen into a deep, once-in-a-lifetime kind of love during their time together, thus negating the whole 'one-shot' thing Ennis had declared it to be.

with that in mind, i can see why so many people believed that they never kissed during their initial months of relationship building. They both could have justified it by thinking that as long as they didn't kiss, their tryst didn't mean anything special, nor would it make them queer for going at it like rabbits. Then they both go through the turmoil of losing each other, not knowing why it was they felt so bad about going their separate ways, and go through four long years of silence before "the first sign of life" appears in the form of a postcard.

Jack pulls up in Ennis' driveway, and Ennis is so overcome with joy and desire that first thing his (alcohol-muddled) mind thinks to do is kiss the living daylights out of Jack, and in that moment—as those old forum users had put it—that was basically the first time either of them were able to acknowledge to themselves that the summer on the mountain in '63 meant a whole lot more to them than it should have.

i dunno. i think it's a really interesting subject to think about, one that gets broached in fics very rarely. would like to hear your all's thoughts, if any!

[omgwhatchloe]

@ercticisms i made a ramble about lenny

thinking abt lenny getting heat exhaustion/stroke in clemens point…

so how does HE get it but no one else?? well it starts when he gets too many compliments on how well hes doing, which fuels him to do all the chores around camp, to maximise compliments (???) and when it starts to work he just keeps going. and he doesnt actually touch the shade long enough for it to be considered time in the shade, despite sweating all day from the constant southern swampy heat. this repeats for about 2 days before he starts sweating harder.

and he wakes up with an awful headache, which he doesnt comment on. but it BOTHERS him, like it actually makes him mad as he attempts to do chores. he is also extremely dizzy when he lifts a sack up, like his vision is almost black and he doesnt know if hes still standing at one point until he manoeuvres himself onto the floor. and he sits there. he is so nauseous he could cry, so frustrated from the heat he could scream, so dizzy and sweaty with a head that feels like its been shot, its overwhelming. to the point he doesn’t even get up, just buries his face in his knees.

when he is found by arthur, who yells for hosea, he is well and truly blacked out. not to mention his poor arms are very sunburnt and will be torturous when he wakes up. thankfully without the camp noticing too much, they walk him to johns tent, as hes extremely hazy but able to put one foot in front of the other, even if he doesnt know his own name or where hes going. within an hour, he has a fever that has overtaken his body.

hes drifting in and out of the most uncomfortable and inconsistent sleep of his life, his body pouring with sweat as it burns up. he truly has no idea where he is, only that he is so hot and in pain. sean has taken his clothes off him, only leaving his drawers, and laid a thin blanket over him, which immediately sticks to his skin. all lenny knows is that he doesnt like where he is because its too hot and it hurts. so as soon as mr macguire goes to get a cloth for his head, lenny is GONE.

thank god he still remembers its not socially acceptable to just wander around in your drawers, and wraps himself in the blanket as he stumbles to his feet, his head POUNDING. hes almost numb, the pain and heat is so bad. slowly shuffling, he leaves the tent and starts to walk barefoot through camp. of course, about 85% of people in camp have no idea whats wrong with him, so they kind of…stare in confusion and dont stop him as he shuffles out of camp in nothing but a blanket.

lenny doesnt know where hes going, he doesnt even know hes supposed to think of a destination as he starts to walk, the sun absolutely going feral on his body, throwing all its heat at the poor boy who is so out of it he doesnt realise thats why hes so uncomfortable. its an extremely unique sight, especially since its lenny summers going through this.

sean goes back into the tent with the cloth, and sees a lenny-shaped spot on the bed…but no lenny.

his heart DROPS. like literally drops. he runs out of the tent and looks around camp to see lenny is NOT THERE. and it goes a bit like this.

“WHERE THE FUCK IS LENNY?”

“…”

“WHERE IS HE?!”

“he-he went out-“

“WHAT?! YOU DIDNT STOP THE BASTARD?!”

“why would-“

“DO YOU KNOW HOW ILL HE IS?! FOR FUCK SAKE HES NOT WEARING CLOTHES! WHERE-WHICH-WHICH WAY-“

*shaky point*

“LENNY!!!!”

thank god lennys shaky legs didnt get him that far and sean found him just about as soon as he left camp on ennis. like literally left the trees then turned his head.

“LENNY! COME HERE BOY!”

of course lenny doesnt even know hes meant to respond when people call for him, so sean rides over. its surprisingly easy to get him onto ennis as lenny entire reaction is “oh we’re doing this now? ok!”

anyways it takes him a few days to recover with sean doting on him and hosea and miss grimshaw being the ones who actually know how to help💔