#embalming math

[yourlocalthanatologist]

[veryundercookedbreadart]

𝓐𝓮𝓼𝓸𝓹 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓵

[vvventrue]

Right as I pulled into campus I realized I forgot my fucking calculator...here's to hoping they aren't overpriced at the student center...

[nemeyuko]

Tumblr if it existed in Lovecraft’s work would be a literal nightmare.

0 notes

💉 doctor-reanimator Follow

My assistant just came home from a trip to Illinois. I acquired a new specimen and tried out my new embalming fluid on it. My assistant will record the progress of reanimation.

🪦 reanimator-assistant Follow

West injected a compound into the specimen to counteract the embalming fluid.

🪦 reanimator-assistant Follow

West put a pillow over it. Afterwards, he injected the body with the reagent. It’s possible the specimen may tell us what’s on the other side of death!

🪦 reanimator-assistant Follow

West did what now?

15k notes

📐 math-folklore-gilman Follow

I keep having fucked up dreams about the witch that used to live in the house I rented for cheap. Especially since my rented room, the attic, was where she did her magic. I’m sure it’s nothing.

📐 math-folklore-gilman Follow

That’s a weird giant rat! I hate these fucking dreams!

10 notes

🖋️ bostonnephew-deactivated02181928

I got this weird box full of documents from being the heir of my great uncle’s estate after he passed. It has this strange bas-relief and notes. I’ll read what’s in it.

🖋️ bostonnephew-deactivated02181928

Cthulhu still sleeps beneath the waves in his sunken city. I know the cult knows I know too much. They’ll take care of me like they did my great uncle. If you don’t see me on here anymore, that’s why.

🐙 cthulhu-cultist80008 Follow

lol idiot.

90k notes

🌙 carter-the-dreamer Follow

Why do people think I killed Harley Warren? I did not! I do not know what has become of my friend Harley Warren.

3 notes

🐟 olmsteads-journal Follow

Hey, I’m going to visit this weird seaport town while on the way to Arkham to do genealogical research. People in Newburyport don’t want me to visit, but it’s the cheapest route to Arkham. Wish me luck!

🐟 olmsteads-journal Follow

Year later… but…

I was related to someone from that town and something else.

After I fled the town, started to become like the people from the town. I shall join them in the sea with my cousin! :)

70 notes

📚 curwen-research Follow

Note to everyone: don’t try summon up your ancestors from the grave with essential salts.

If you see a Dr. Allen around Providence, Rhode Island. Please shoot him and dissolve his body in acid.

📚 curwen-research Follow

Take no account of what I published. Dr. Allen is a grand man who meant no harm.

30 notes

👤 outsider2817 Follow

I’m going to leave my house for the first time! Wish me luck!

👤 outsider2817 Follow

I went to a house full of people partying. They all screamed and fled. What was that about?

👤 outsider2817 Follow

Oh.

100k notes

(Inspired by @strangestcase)

[fictionadventurer]

My brother and I were discussing the Resurrection, and he brought up how it's not really three days in the tomb, which led us to discuss the math behind "on the third day," as usually happens when this topic comes up.

But then I realized--He couldn't stay away any longer, because the women were coming to embalm him. He had to be alive again before they could return and care for his dead body.

God died battered, broken, betrayed, abandoned, humiliated, disgraced--but he also had to hurry back because of how deeply he was loved.

[coffinup]

Hey! I’m currently in high school and thinking about going into funeral services. I’ve felt with grief for most of my life so I think I could get around it being mentally hard, but I also kind of despise math and have forgotten everything I learned about it this summer. Anything you think I should know about the industry?

I think your experience with grief will absolutely make you the right person for the job. The funeral profession always needs people who understand the struggle and can have true empathy.

So the math thing: there are some US states that require a four-year degree for mortuary science, and some (like mine) that split it up into a separate associates degree and secondary mortuary science diploma. Usually the four-year degrees are attained at universities, and the split/trade style degrees are attained at colleges, trade schools or community colleges. Several colleges have programs you can do hybrid/online as long as you can work at a funeral home. For both you’ll have to do college-level math courses for your gen-ed requirements. BUT something I did for my undergrad is I took a C.L.E.P test for college math so I didn’t have to take a class. CLEPS let you test out of a credit course, so I would look into that if you don’t want to do college math classes. There are study guides for them too. Aside from that, there isn’t much math in mortuary science that goes beyond basic algebra. I had to take an accounting class which required some money-related math, but that was the extent of it. There’s a formula in embalming called the primary dilution formula that is a very basic algebraic problem that’s super easy as long as you understand basic algebra concepts.

I’ll also say a couple things, since you are a young person that wants to go into it out of high school:

-Be prepared to deal with old fogeys that are set in their ways. There will be a lot of them, and the best strategy is to just accept what they try to teach you, and then make decisions based on what you think is best after that.

-Mortuary Science has one of the highest drop-out rates because of the graphic nature of it. About half of my class in the first anatomy course dropped out after we went for our autopsy examination. I think it’s probably stating the obvious that things can get gross, but if you aren’t squeamish and can express and tackle your feelings, you’ll be fine. You’ll be encountering human bodies in various stages of decay, various forms of injury and deformation, and see lots of results of disease. Just be prepared for that! And have an outlet like a trusted friend, therapist or journal where you can talk about your experiences, it’s important to not keep things bottled up!

-Funeral service rarely has an ideal work/life balance. Most funeral homes work on a “10/4” or “2 week” work schedule where you’ll work ten days in a row and get four days off. Some days you’ll work 6-8 hours, other days you might be there all day and night. Something to be prepared for. Larger firms and corporations tend to have more set/defined schedules.

I hope that helps! Good luck on your journey, and I truly wish you the best. Young people being interested in this profession always makes me happy, and I think you’ll do great things. Don’t be too discouraged by your perceived limitations, you NEVER know until you try! And the great thing about being at the age you are is you have ample time to try new things!

Best wishes :)

-Memento Mori

[battleangel]

What About Killing Fields?

Michael Jackson literally screamed the title to this blog post in, Earth Song.

Please, go watch the video if youve never seen it before:

Why was Michael screaming the lyrics, literally screaming them, about killing fields trying to get through to us?

Trying to get through to our empathy?

Trying to make us give a fucking damn?

50k Palestinian civilians have been murdered in the genocide caused by Israel, funded by and weapons provided by the US & Boeing, since last October.

There is a pending famine caused purposely by the genocide that if it is not stopped by a PERMANENT ceasefire agreement will result in millions of deaths, including children.

They could unblock the bridge from Egypt to Rafah today.

They dont want to.

You do know who they is.

They could deliver emergency flotillas to feed all of the starving Palestinians today.

Are you claiming that the US has 4.3 billion dollars a year to fund Israels genocide but doesnt have money to deliver food to a few million starving Palestinians at risk of being murdered by a forced famine?

So, why dont they?

Instead, we have flour massacres (look it up), where starving Palestinians promised aid are literally gunned down by the IDF terrorists for attempting to obtain food that was promised to them.

It has happened again and again.

Palestinian starving civilians promised food and then murdered and gunned down in cold blood the moment they try to obtain literally life-saving food.

Netanyahu is purposely starving them and not allowing food and aid in.

Netanyahu is literally blocking the flotilla, the bridge from Egypt into Palestine and the emergency aid trucks all filled with food just sitting as millions of Palestinians, including children, are forced to literally eat cattle feed to survive.

Its not like dog food.

It is absolutely inedible for humans yet there are videos on social media of children choking down cattle feed.

What about killing fields?

But all Americans care about at a mass level are their 4th of July plans.

Why the fuck would you ever want to “celebrate” the “birth” of a nation that is white supremacist, colonialist, racist, misogynist, fascistic, built off of police brutality, slavery of Africans with no restitution or reparations free slave labor with no wages ever paid to anyone that built this nation, Christofascist, zionist, Greco-Roman, Eurocentric, ancient Egypt denying, Kemet denying, melanin denying, appropriating from Black people our music that we created - country (look it up), jazz, blues, rhythm & blues, rock (not Elvis - look it up), ofcourse hip hop & rap, reggae, soca, etc — our culture, our cornrows, our braids, our dreads, our hair, our Kanekalon, our Senegalese twists everything just becomes a fashion statement for the Kardashians — misappropriation of our culture and constantly stealing from us then lying about it and erasing us from the history — Disney stole designs from a black creator designer & cartoonist who was never credited (look it up) — why do you think there are so many examples of this?

Africa — Kemet which is ancient Egypt — is the birthplace of humanity.

Ancient Egyptians developed roads, highways, infrastructure, irrigation, aqueduct systems, modern medicine (look it up), modern surgery techniques, modern embalming techniques, astrology, math, art, history, astronomy, philosophy all before the Greeks & Romans & “Enlightenment” yet look who gets credited for inventing these things.

Jesus is a bastardized Horus from Kemet from ancient Egypt, it is a 1:1 bastardization and shit retelling, everything from dying and rising again the third day.

Look it up.

They removed all the wisdom, esotericism, knowledge of the self, mysticism, magick and replaced it with fear, dogma, control, a fake white guy with a beard, a Santa Claus in the skies sitting on a fake ass throne judging you for hooking up on Tinder last Saturday.

Yet you question nothing.

They say they dont know how the pyramids were built and that “even today” we do not have the technology the ancient Egyptians had and that the stones of the pyramid were built so close together that you cannot even slide a debit card through them.

Yet you question nothing.

You dont question why the capstone is missing on top of the pyramid or why it is on the back of the US $1 bill, the default global currency, with an eye above it.

Still you question nothing.

Look up the Eye of Ra.

Go read the lyrics of Earth Song while listening to MJ then come back:

79% of plastic that has ever been made still sits in landfills or the natural environment.

It takes 400 years for plastic to break down in a landfill.

Did you process that?

Every sanitary pad, every pantyliner, every plastic tampon applicator, every plastic utensil, every Red Solo cup, every Dixie cup, every plastic plate, every plastic water bottle, every Ziploc bag, every plastic cap to your toothpaste tube, every plastic potato chip bag, every plastic wrapper, every plastic medicine bottle, every single plastic K-cup for your daily morning coffee.

Every time you use a washing machine to wash your laundry, it causes microplastics that are released and end up in oceans.

Single use plastic is absolutely ubiquitous.

There have been 9.1 billion tons of plastic produced since throwaway culture was introduced in the 1950s and disposable plastic was introduced for the first time.

Plastic is actually extremely durable, they just didnt want it to be.

You do know who they is.

Why the 50s?

Because WWII had just ended and they needed something to mass produce now that they no longer needed to mass produce for the war.

So, single use plastic was introduced and marketed to the masses as convenient, time saving, modern and more hygienic.

Just how retirement was marketed as “golden years” — still pathetically parroted today — by a marketer.

Look it up. Also in the 1950s.

Prior to this marketing campaign, retirement was dreaded as a period of decline in health.

The marketing campaign shifted this to the golden years of your life.

It was a marketing campaign built to push retirement living and communities and it not only worked but the pathetic idea of working your entire life to “finally be able to do what you want for ten years max” is somehow still around today.

Brainwashing, grooming, conditioning, indoctrination centers.

Seductive marketing, hypnotic messaging, brainwashing techniques in advertising.

Psyops.

Same with homeownership being the “American Dream”.

Look it up.

It was started as a marketing campaign at the beginning of the 1900s by a president of a real estate company.

The marketing campaign proved so successful that starting with FDR’s New Deal, the United States government started pushing and promoting home ownership as quintessential to the American Dream.

Today, 94% of Americans believe that owning a home is a quintessential part of the American dream.

Brainwashed. Indoctrinated. Conditioned. Groomed.

Its actually taking on hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt, signing your life away for 20 to 30 years when you have no control over the housing market or economy.

Have you all already forgotten about Lehman Brothers, subprime mortgages and the housing collapse PURPOSELY CAUSED in 2008 by lenders providing loans to borrowers whom they knew would be unable to pay the loans back thus causing a housing market collapse and allowing the same lenders to buy back these subprime loans and pocket billions while the housing market and economy crashed and millions lost their homes and jobs?

Were you alive in 2008?

If not, look it up.

So, its a losing proposition, owning a home.

A HELOC is taking on more debt even if you borrow against the equity in your home in the form of a loan, you will have to pay the loan back with interest.

No thanks.

Even if you are clever and invest in upgrading your home, rent it out, make money off of it as a rental property or invest in it and flip it and profit it off of it or if you pay the loan off over 20 or 30 years, do upgrades to the home, then sell it for a significant profit, so what?

How the fuck is that a “dream”?

You just made money, who the fuck cares?

That doesnt explain the promotion of home ownership as a quintessential part of the American dream.

WHAT American dream???????

Meritocracy???????????

Most of the wealth in America is owned by white people as they concentrate the wealth then pass it on to their future generations and bloodline through estate planning and wills that transfers real estate and assets from wealthy parents to their children.

Wash rinse repeat.

How the fuck is that a meritocracy?????

Blacks are 13% of the population yet we make up over 80% of the prison population.

Meritocracy???????????

Poverty in America is overwhelmingly endured by Black and brown minorities.

Most of the youth in foster care are Black and brown.

Foster care youth end up houseless and imprisoned at an enormously higher rate.

What leads to being placed in foster care other than racist policies and being Black and brown?

Substance use by parents and parents becoming houseless.

What overwhelmingly causes substance use and houselessness?

Poverty.

Yet we still have never addressed poverty in America.

How hard would it be to take the Earned Income Tax Credit that right now goes to parents with children that own a home, take that money and repurpose it to a Universal Basic Income (UBI) that provides each American adult 18 and over with a $1k a month?

They have done studies that have shown that even $500 a month — and if we have $4 billion to send to Israel every year to kill innocent Palestinian civilians dont tell me we dont have $500 a month for every adult in the US — significantly improved the lives of families in poverty — they stopped skipping meals, they stopped undereating, starving, eating sugar sandwiches and dry cereal for dinner, they stopped avoiding getting needed urgent medical care, they stopped smoking to suppress their appetite (this is well documented, look it up), they stopped drinking as self medication, they stopped eating cheap shitty fast food and frozen meals — and surprise, surprise their quality of life went way up.

For $500 fucking dollars.

And surprise, surprise, they dont want that.

And you do know who they is.

Every year, the world produces nearly 400 million tons of plastic, a 19,000% increase from 1950.

The amount is forecast to double by 2050 and 90% is never recycled.

Over half of the plastics produced are used only once, for things like packaging, utensils and straws.

This is why the fight long termism and they dont want you googling Claudia Karina 2024.

They dont want you thinking 100, 250 and 500 years from now.

Everything is the now, everything is the moment, everything disposable, everything ephemeral, everything throwaway.

Almost 30,000 coffee pods go to landfill each month and take 500 years to decompose.

All that for a fucking cup of coffee?

Be so serious.

The fast fashion industry is the second-biggest consumer of water and is responsible for about 10% of global carbon emissions – more than all international flights and maritime shipping combined.

It’s a form of throwaway culture called fast fashion, which produces 92 million tons of waste annually on a global scale.

All to save a few bucks on a shittily designed outfit on Shein by workers that are underpaid working 12 to 16 plus hour shifts and if they make more than a few mistakes per MONTH, they have their pay docked.

But who cares as long as your fit is cute and cheap, right?

Humans have evolved to live on this planet – life on other planets, while technically possible, is undesirable, unhealthy and constrained.

Which ofcourse is Lord Elon & Lord Bezos’ plan — destroy Earth for Amazon Prime 1 Day Sales & Teslas EVs.

Then on to the next planet after they hump, pump and dump Earth.

Do I really have to tell you that only rich wypipo — who caused the destruction of Earth — will be along for the ride to Mars or wherever the fuck planet these sociopaths are planning to colonize next?

The poor, impoverished, disabled, and especially elderly and ofcourse Black & brown people will be left behind except for those who manage to make a deal with the devil, sell the souls and board the Galaxy Express to the next destination of destruction.

Stop driving your car.

Burning fossil fuels is one of the biggest drivers and contributors of climate change.

Need to drive to get to work?

Look into remote options, freelance and/or start your own business online at home.

Ride a bike or a scooter, walk, take a bus or public transportation.

Or just dont go out.

You dont have to shop, socialize, eat, “hang out”, go to the movies.

Do your hair yourself or shave it bald like I do every 3 to 6 months.

I only paid for the razor, after that it is free99 for me to shave my own head:

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRES93oT/

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRESVh9T/

If youre a woman or femme and afraid of the reactions, watch my above TikToks.

Question why they are reacting.

Question why you care.

Youve been programmed.

Do it anyway.

If you want color, use chalk dyes as they are temporary and wash out after one use and do not have harmful chemicals dyes and toxins as most salon & store bought vegan dyes do.

Or just slap on a shitty cheap wig if you want some color and variety. I bought a $20 wig two years ago that I wear if I want a colorful lewk.

Thats not wasteful.

Thats not buying a new wig every month or every 3 months. Or going to the salon every month or every 3 months. Or buying hair dyes or getting my hair colored every 3 months.

Deprogram yourself.

Cargill produces 11 billion pounds of beef a year.

11 billion. Every year.

Play Earth Song by Michael again.

Cargill made $170 billion last year.

Nothing is ever enough.

The essence of capitalism.

Nothing is ever enough under capitalism.

They are willing to light the world on fire and watch it burn as long as they can continue to grow faster, bigger, stronger, more acquisitions, more money, more wealth, more employees, bigger share prices, higher on the fortune 500, number one meat processor, made triple what Tyson Foods made, made $60 billion more than second closest competitor.

You do know who they is.

There is no price they arent willing to pay to be number one in a capitalist market, no corner they wont cut, no practice they wont stoop to, no low they wont lower themselves to, no lie they wont tell, no animal they wont mistreat/torture/drug/feed with hormones/breed & impregnate endlessly/crowd in overcrowded pens & stalls/terrify/decapitate while alive due to stun guns not working/decapitate up to six times before it works as it is a machine that is an imperfect process and the cow is alive for each attempt/feed dead cows to living cows to save money on feed/not allow them room to walk or move much less provide them with pastures open air sky sun water land.

What about yesterday?

What about disease?

There is no price they arent willing to pay to be number one in a capitalist market, no corner they wont cut, no practice they wont stoop to, no low they wont lower themselves to, no lie they wont tell, no animal they wont mistreat/torture/drug/feed with hormones/breed & impregnate endlessly/crowd in overcrowded pens & stalls/terrify/decapitate while alive due to stun guns not working/decapitate up to six times before it works as it is a machine that is an imperfect process and the cow is alive for each attempt/feed dead cows to living cows to save money on feed/not allow them room to walk or move much less provide them with pastures open air sky sun water land.

No low is too low when there are profits to be made & shareholders to satisfy.

Trump snorted Adderall during the filming of The Apprentice. Theres actual documentation of this.

Watch the video of Trump with pupils f u l l y dilated and fucking blown like a full out fucking meth head slurring the words, “I love everybody”, and tell me hes not snorting Adderall, doing meth and potentially coke.

After WWII, between 1945 and 1949, 20 million refrigerators, 21.4 million cars, and 5.5 million stoves were purchased by American households.

World War II had just ended, families had more disposable income on their hands, and more spending power.

Marketing. Programming. Shiny. New. Ironmen. Fitter. Iron lungs.

There was a huge push from the oil industry to get plastic single-use items adopted widely. For Mobil Chemical (now ExxonMobile), it was all about the plastic bags. During the 1960s they had been patenting all the plastic bag ideas they could. By 1977 they were producing their own brand of plastic bags.

Exxon Mobil created a Plastic Grocery Sack Council in 1985 to get customers to use plastic sacks widely.

Same with retirement being the “golden years” and purchasing a house “being the American dream”.

94% of adult Americans say they identify home ownership as a quintessential part of the American dream.

So, who created the concept since it is so ubiquitous in American society & culture?

The first president of the US League of Local Building & Loan Associations in the 1890s.

Pure propaganda.

Its literally a hundred fucking years of propaganda.

What about the “golden years” of retirement?

Instead of dreaded years of decline, Del Webb revolutionized retirement in America to be something people desired and longed for.

Through the magic of marketing, retirement no longer only meant the end of work. Del Web cleverly sold retirement as the beginning of a new and even better life.

Ten fucking years of retirement is a “life”?

Youve been programmed.

Del Web was simply marketing his retirement communities and rebranded what Americans thought of retirement as.

Look up “Sun City” communities.

Thats why youre slaving your life away at a job you either dont like, hate, or apathetic about, indifferent to, which is literally designed to overwork you, overwhelm you, shut you down, attack your psyche, attack your aura, energy vampires draining your energy, exhausting you, constant pointless masturbatory meetings, constant slacks, IMs, emails, notis.

Constant demands to break you as a person.

Its mindbreaking.

The 9 to 5.

Look up why cubicles were “invented” in the 1960s.

Wake up.

Freelance. Start your own business. Create social media content.

Do what you want now, not when youre 65.

What happens if you die at 64?

The entire idea people predicate their lives on — that they should study hard get good grades graduate; get a good job work hard save for retirement; ten years max before they die “enjoy their golden years” aka retirement.

Wake up.

Per Google:

• Extreme heat waves can cause mood swingsand other psychological effects that can impact mental health:

• Mood changes: Heat waves can cause irritability, anxiety, depression, and impulsivity.

• Cognitive issues: Heat waves can cause trouble concentrating, memory problems, and slowed reaction times.

• Sleep disruption: Heat waves can make it difficult to sleep, which can contribute to mood fluctuations and worsen mental health conditions.

Its an added benefit for them on top of the record profits that cause the climate change that cause the extreme weather, heat waves & poor air quality.

Its not just bad for the environment.

They are aware of the effects as these studies have been around for years.

They want people disordered, addicted, depressed, anxious, overworked, mind body imbalance, severed from nature, obsessed, stressed, never self actualizing, never ascending.

Watch the Earth Song video by MJ:

Understand why he is literally screaming.

Screaming to get through to us.

Do we give a damn?

Really listen at 2:58.

Hes trying to get through to our collective empathy.

Screaming!

Almost 30 years later after this song and video was released, all of these questions can be posed to us today.

Every issue has gotten worse, not better.

Do we give a damn?

Look at the destruction all around MJ in the video.

Look at the destruction weve caused.

Ecological destruction.

Look at the trees surrounding MJ as he screams for empathy, screams for justice, screams for mother Earth, screams for our humanity.

Do we give a damn?

Are we so cruel, so indifferent, so apathetic, so numb to our own beautiful planets destruction?

Who cares, right? We’ll just go destroy another.

And another. And another…

There’ll always be another Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, Tim Cook, Trump, J.D. Rockefeller, Ford.

There will always be another leviathan and titan of industry.

Always be more strongmen and ironmen.

Why do you think that is?

Who are the Reptilians?

Who are the inhabitants that live INSIDE the middle of the earth controlling our politics and elections.

Even you are aware that our elections arent actually free or they wouldnt allow them.

Thats why theres never a change.

Trump and Biden again?

The inhabitants of the middle of the planet control the Reptilians — world political leaders and industry titans and leviathans and military leaders.

They ensure that humanitys consciousness never ascends on a mass level and that there is no mass ascension which would lead to a planetary ascension which would remove the grid that the inhabitants of the earth placed there to suppress our mass consciousness and awakening, to keep our third eyes closed and to keep us and our planet from self actualizing from the current third dimension to the tenth dimension.

Do you know who “they” is?

Watch Futurama and actually understand that what is presented to you as “jokes” are the dark entities controlling the dark empaths that currently rule our world.

The Bidens, Trumps, Netanyahus, Blinkens, Jamie Dimons, Elon Musks, Jeff Bezoses, Roger Goodells, Vince McMahons, Tim Cooks, Bill Gates.

All white men — have you ever wondered why that is?

Even Obama descends from the same UK royal bloodline that all US Presidents have descended from.

Look it up.

They’re Reptilian.

The tens of thousands of animal species that WE humans have made go extinct.

1 species — human — is not more worthy than even ONE animal species.

Yet we have made over 75 PERCENT of animal species go extinct with our enviornmentally destructive and capitalist driven practices.

Yet people have the AUDACITY to call ME a terrorist?

Im an "ecoterrorist" because I am for the VOLUNTARY extinction of the human race?

Then what are they when they are okay with the extinction of tens of thousands of animal species by ONE disgustingly destructive species — HUMAN — to the extent that over 75 PERCENT of all animal species that have ever existed on Earth are now extinct because of US, humanity!

THEY are the terrorists, NOT me!

I want the Earth saved and humanity extinct.

They want what Elon & Bezos wants — the destruction of Earth and then humans, just like the Borg, just move to the next planet and fucking destroy it and I dont want that.

There has been no reversal of these consumerist, capitalist, overconsumption, maximalist, climate change causing contributing & accelerating, ecologically destructive, environmentally harmful, rainforest destroying, landfill filling business practices.

THEY are financially rewarded so the practices continue and the Earth continues to die!

Resources continue to be overextracted.

The global south continues to be exploited by the capitalist west as they do not have labor laws, union protections or environmental regulations so cheap stuff is made there, their resources are overextracted, they are overworked and underpaid, they are not given protective gear, they die, they get poisoned, they get sick, women and children working and dying in cobalt mines for iPhones!

Women and children working and dying in cobalt mines in Congo for iPhones!

Women and children working and dying in diamond mines in Senegal for engagement rings!

Humanity in the capitalist west continues to overconsume, be materialistic, wasteful, overspend, to impress others, for clout, to flex, for status, for prestige, for privilege, to “treat themselves”, to “spoil themselves”, to numb themselves, to feed their addictions, to feed their disordered behaviors, to fill their emptiness, to give themselves a sense of identity, in an endless quest for meaning, to overcompensate, because they are depressed, stressed, pressed, obsesed, anxious, bored, listless, lethargic, lack empathy, addicted to shopping, retail therapy, numbing their emotions, adrenaline rush of a new purchase getting something on sale discount rack BOGO FOMO new shoes new dress new makeup new pocketbook for that hit of adrenaline for that instant pick me up.

Instant mood changer, instant happiness, instant smile, instant distraction, instant swipe of the credit card, instant swipe of Apple Pay, instant swipe of your phone, instant rush, instant adrenaline, instant high, instant hit, instant junkie.

Addicted to excess, consumption, consumerism, materialism, shopping, malls, outlets, discounts, sales, department stores, fast fashion, Zaful, Romwe, Fashion Nova, Shein, Forever 21, H&M, Macys, Bloomingdales, Express, Old Navy, Aeropostale, Abercrombie.

Addicted addicts.

Never a thought to the resources used to produce the item being purchased.

Never a thought to the fuel being wasted to deliver the item being purchased to the shopping mall or store or outlet or straight to your home via Amazon Prime.

Never a thought to the climate change impact, carbon footprint contribution, fossil fuels burned, impact to the ozone layer, air quality deteriorating, heat waves worsening, natural disasters increasing.

The earth dying.

Killing fields, Forever 21, forever in a landfill.

Never a thought.

The bible which is bastardized kemet and is used as a tool of control claims that Adam & Eve have “dominion” over the animals and earth and that fake shit has been used to justify everything: throwaway culture & single use plastics on the 50s, fast food in the 50s, fast fashion in the 2000s.

Wear an outfit once, throw it away.

Use plastic utensils once, throw them away.

Use your iPhone once, oh theres a pink one now and this blonde golfer and this couple are telling me to buy it through Tmobile or Verizon, time to trade in my perfectly working current iPhone for a new one because its pink.

I mean, because it has 8 cameras on the back and not 7.

I mean, because it has FaceTime.

I mean, because I want to react “Haha” to my friends texts and I dont want to be left out.

Killing fields.

Electronic waste from discarded iPhones end up in Southeast Asia poisoning local communities, water supply and air quality but it is kept from the American public.

Congo killing mines killing women and children for the cobalt that powers the batteries in iPhones, electric vehicles, Apple watches & TVs are kept from the public.

Genocides & killing fields.

iPhone 15s.

Cruises are allowed to dump their waste directly into the ocean.

Cruisin USA.

Via foe.org:

If you guessed a large portion of it ends up in the oceans, you’d be correct. Sadly, U.S. laws do not do enough to protect our bodies of water. It allows cruise ships to dump waste into the ocean as long as the ships are more than three and a half miles offshore. That means that dirty water from sinks and showers and laundry facilities are discharged into the water. It means that waste from toilets is discharged into the water. And it also means that food waste is also dumped into the ocean. 

What about killing fields?

[bestworstcase]

i am asking you about tdt! remnant with particular interest in unhinged climate

it is so kind of you all to enable me (@meltedintoair @froginboillingpastawater @lemon-embalmer @blakistan)

don’t mind the unfinished continent i’m still (through gritted teeth) figuring the strandlines out… also if you’re wondering why solitas looks like that it’s because for narrative reasons i needed land at the north pole here’s what she looks like Put Together

ANYWAY you will notice that i’ve moved things around. anima and menagerie north by a solid 30’ and rotated sanus a little bit counter-clockwise for the sake of not having vale and vacuo on almost the same latitude. mostly this is for the sake of bringing the various climates of these places into more reasonable bounds for an earthlike-ish climate—except for vale, which has a maritime climate with cool summers and coldish winters at 6’N, because i fixated on the puzzle of “earthlike climate except for this One Region” like you would not believe.

but before we get to Refrigerated Vale we have to talk about

✨the moons✨

yes moons plural. because i looked at the broken moon and heard the siren call of THE TIDES. tdt!remnant has three moons: mar, the original, which is (like the canon moon) not tidally locked and has a massive dark crater on one side (THE MOUTH OF THE MOON–), and the much smaller anthe + ogmios, which formed through the accretion of debris flung away when the god of darkness exploded the moon and are smaller.

INCIDENTALLY the hegemonic calendar is a lunisolar calendar with months correlating to mar’s cycle and 8-day weeks (octs) correlating to ogmios’ much shorter cycle; anthe is culturally associated with the god of animals and khimerism—that’s the monotheistic worship of the god of animals practiced by many fauni—has an anthean lunar calendar that is wildly different. the vytali common calendar has 12 months divided into 8-day octs (with some gnarly intercalation going on to align the calendar with the solar year); the khimeric calendar has 17 months divided into 9-day enneads with an intercalary month and handful of three-day-long leaping festivals that rotate the calendar through the solar year in a fifteen year cycle. it would be remiss of me not to plug fantasy-calendar for all your batshit calendar making needs. i have a spreadsheet where i pin down all the math and then just set everything up in FC it has never let me down.

back of napkin math:

on average the tides are about +/- 3.9 m. neap tides where all three moons pull against each other, +/- 3.7 m. spring tides where they line up, +/- 4.2—these are the open ocean tidal range, coastal tides are highly variable but as a very rough estimate tidal ranges along the (habitable) coasts are probably somewhere between ~2 and ~16m, with significant amounts of uninhabitable coastline where the tidal range is much larger and building on the high tide coast means your settlement is several kilometers inland at low tide. riverside building is also quite difficult because tidal bores are. pretty extreme

port cities don’t have harbors the way we think of them. they have either sprawling, complicated systems of locks operated by konurgists (=professional practitioners of dust-based magic) or they have cliffside dry docks designed for lightweight vessels to ride in and out with the tides. vale’s wharf district is a maze of locks and caissons. argus and kuo kuana have dry harbors.

the other thing about multi-moon systems is you get more significant tidal flexing ergo more volcanism

so where earth experiences ~70 volcanic eruptions per year on average, remnant the triple moon tsunami tides planet gets to have a “statistically there is always a volcano erupting somewhere in the world” trivia question, and all the air quality problems and acid rain you get from that.

SO the first consideration with regard to tdt remnant’s earthlike climate is that the conditions which produce it are very different; i… am That kind of person who back of napkin crunched numbers for all of this (and spent like an hour fiddling to not tidally lock the planet to the star 😭) BUT the numbers don’t matter per se; the salient piece is that the sun is both cooler and a little further away than ours (<- yes this IS me looking into the camera like i’m on the office about the god of light) and the planet is kept habitable by tidal heating, meaning the friction produced by the moons stretching and squeezing the planet as they orbit around it.

the moons stress balling the planet is also what causes The Volcanoes, which release greenhouse gasses (keeping remnant warmer than it would otherwise be) but also semi-regularly you’ll get enough big eruptions in clusters to Deflect The Fucking Sun like it’s 1816 and global temperatures nosedive and climates all over go haywire for a year or two. i think this happens on average about once per century but the current historical period—the seventh era—begins with a quarter century called the forge years when the planet got HAMMERED by four really bad volcanic winters in quick succession. think “14th century black plague” levels of decimation, except it was worldwide famines + just an explosion of conflicts and wars over food sources + grimm, whose populations spike whenever there’s a major volcanic event because the planet’s mantle is a mixture of molten rock and atrum (=grimm juice).

(there are very few true herbivores in this world. there are a lot of animals that eat plants when it’s warm and meat when it’s cold. true herbivores tend to be either animals that store huge food caches or animals that can go a really, really long time without eating. plants mostly either develop super deep root systems, or pump out antifreeze proteins when the temperature drops, or develop cold-mediated serotiny, or a combination.)

BECAUSE OF ALL THAT, remnant’s oceans circulate in a completely different way than ours; tidal heating warms the bottom water at the poles, causing it to rise in strong east-to-west or west-to-east currents, forcing colder surface water downwards and flowing towards the equator. consequently remnant does not have permanent ice caps, although most of solitas is perpetually snowy above its strandline.

(the strandline is where the water is at high tide; as noted in many cases this is several kilometers inland from the low-tide coast. anima, solitas, alukah—that’s the unnamed dragon continent—and sanus are all a single contiguous landmass at low tide, with huge land bridges exposed. it is generally not a good idea to try to walk, with the exception of one specific island chain that is small enough to traverse safely on foot by walking island-to-island over a span of about three days, four if you’re being cautious.)

the upshot of all this is it’s relatively warmer and wetter at the poles and cooler and drier at the equator compared to earth, because the oceans are effectively upside-down, warmest at the bottom near the poles. (if you’re wondering why the tidal heating is distributed this way, the real-world exemplar i’m working from is europa. interesting reading!)

northern anima is a bit of a special case because even though it looks coastal, it isn’t; the sea in between it and solitas is very, very shallow and at low tides is just this for hundreds of kilometers:

so within that curve of the “dragon neck” shape, the whole strandline is functionally landlocked with respect to the warm rising polar currents and during the wintertime can actually get colder than the region of solitas where mantle is located.

and then there’s the impact of dust.

i’ve drifted quite a bit off the basic ‘fantasy elements’ approach taken with dust in canon because the concept of dust as a sort of crystallized energy appeals to me; so there are four basic kinds of dust (thermal, electromagnetic, kinetic, chemical) which can be further divided into subcategories by their specific actions. for example most ‘burn’ and ‘ice’ dusts belong to the thermal family and are distinguished by whether they radiate heat or absorb it. and i say ‘most’ because there are also things like organic-solar/“bog” dust, which forms in peat deposits and produces heat but is classed as an electromagnetic dusts because it’s solar-powered.

large deposits of dust modify the regional climate in often dramatic ways. and this is how we get Refrigerated Vale—the difference between vale and other equatorial regions isn’t as huge as it would be on earth, because remnant’s equatorial band is relatively cool and generally falls more into a ‘warm-to-hot mediterranean climate’ than tropical, but vale is very noticeably cold for its latitude. there are Two Reasons for this.

one is what i’m calling the tarthic koniohaline climate system (TKCS pronounced “ticks”). the tarth sea—that’s the body of water surrounded by alukah, solitas, and sanus—has a huge, several-hundred-kilometer-long seam of variegated dust running along the southern continental shelf, roughly following the curve of the alukite/sanite coastline but further out to sea. (“variegated” meaning it’s a mixture of different types all sort of entangled together.) sort of akin to a barrier reef, but dust.

the tarthic dust formation is mostly a mix of absorptive thermal dusts (colloquially: frost) and kinetic dusts (colloquially: tidal) which together act to cool and desalinate water upwelling against the continental shelf, which is then pushed southward in a clockwise direction along the sanite/alukite coast. that produces a very cool, wet climate along the coastline with frequent thunderstorms as cold fronts coming off the water collide with warmer air rising from the vivax sea to the south (which again: think mediterranean).

vale sits on the southern periphery of the TKCS and is cooled by prevailing winds originating from the tarthic coast. it isn’t as rainy year-round as the vitrine peninsula but it does get quite a lot of precipitation.

the other factor Refrigerating Vale is that there’s absorptive thermal dust in the mountains, too. eastern vale—the counties in the northeast part of the continent, which were contested during the great war and (unlike in canon) not wholly lost to the grimm—has a very pleasant climate, warm summers and mild rainy winters, sometimes snow in the north and at higher altitudes. prevailing winds are fairly dry and warm when they hit the mountains and then rake over peaks that are just covered in frost/ice dusts and act as a giant heat sink, so western vale gets these bitterly cold, super dry winds pouring down the mountains during the summer that collide with warm coastal winds and cause huge storms. in winter the prevailing winds are much weaker, though still freezing, and blow further out to sea so there are fewer storms and infrequent snow but the snow that does fall tends to stick until the spring.

and that’s why the maragda valley is nicknamed the world’s refrigerator and vale’s chief export is various frost/ice dusts :)

OTHER FUN DUST-RELATED THINGS.

the southern part of alukah is called the mordicchiate coast and it’s one of the only regions in the world with a true tropical climate because it’s very, very rich in an assortment of kinetic dusts (mostly different grades of grav) that essentially cook the region by Vibrating Constantly

the other tropical region is in equatorial anima, a big swath of jungle and humid-subtropical grassland in what’s called the palash basin. it’s hot because it’s the caldera of an ancient supervolcano and one of the most volcanically active regions in the world. there are a lot of grimm. there are so many grimm in the palash basin. there’s also a strip of super-fertile land running along the northern rim of the palash region so people keep trying to live there anyway.

along the southwestern coasts of solitas (where those free villages are in arrowfell) there are just enormous underground seams of radiant thermal dusts which heat up the land enough that it’s possible to farm there during the summers; it still snows year-round, but the soil isn’t frozen so all you need is tents with clear panels you can uncover/cover to control sunlight.

the nequam desert—that’s the one surrounding vacuo—is also laced with radiant thermal dusts that bake what would otherwise be a warm arid steppe into a parched, burning-hot desert that wants to kill you. there are hotspots all over the place where the dust veins are so close to the surface that you can cook on the ground; nomadic desert peoples notoriously almost never use cooking fires and were instrumental to vacuo’s success in the great war because radar systems were still very rudimentary and no fires at night meant vacuan guerrillas could maneuver undetected until they appeared seemingly out of fucking nowhere to maul enemy supply convoys.

the wildlife in the menagerian interior are unique on remnant because there is a preponderance of electromagnetic and chemical dust formations on the surface—mostly “shock” dusts, which discharge or generate electricity—and the animals living have been in an evolutionary arms race for millions of years with the result that if it can’t generate electrical shocks on its own, it’s gluing electric rocks to itself decorator-crab style or it’s got specialized structures in its mouth that it can pack dust into and discharge shocks from when it bites you. “how can the wildlife be more dangerous than the grimm,” the rest of the world asks. “we have scorpions whose stings deliver an electric shock at a high enough voltage to kill you before you hit the ground,” says menagerie. “and lightning snakes. and an electrical tortoise. and storm bears–”

there’s a volcano called mount halog on the northwestern dragon-head peninsula of alukah that began to erupt in 332 VE—twenty-five years ago—and has been more or less continuously oozing lava and half-formed grimm ever since.

acid rain (and snow) is a worldwide issue because of the extreme volcanism and in rainy climates settlements exist in a more or less constant state of repair and reconstruction; once a settlement is abandoned it will fall into ruin very, very fast unless the climate is extremely arid. the most volcanically active regions in the world are northern alukah, the palash basin, and the east coast of anima; volcanic smog blows north to kuchinashi from the palash basin fairly regularly.

black rain is a very dangerous weather phenomenon caused by ateric ash—the stuff grimm disintegrate into when they die—floating up into the atmosphere and then precipitating down as liquid atrum. which. coagulates into new grimm. the drippings from the wyvern in canon are the same in principle but much more severe; typically black rains will spawn lots of small grimm—think rat- or cat-sized—and may not leave puddles large enough to form something like a beowolf at all. but a swarm of rat-sized grimm is still no picnic, and black rain is difficult to forecast, so within the vytal league it’s standard practice for huntsmen and grimm extirpation forces to be kept at the ready whenever heavy precipitation is expected, just in case it’s tainted.

the oceans are also quite a bit more acidic than earth’s and tend to be very nutrient-rich near the poles and barren with pockets of life here and there in the equatorial regions—which, as discussed in the Whale Post, in combination with the relative cold creates selective pressure for VERY LARGE akin to the phenomenon of abyssal gigantism but extended higher into the middle pelagic zones. the greatest diversity and density of oceanic life is around the north pole.

(the MONSTER WHALES are called hafgufa, females live in pods around the north pole, males are solitary and range worldwide.)

also,

because atrum does not freeze above absolute zero, and because the planetary mantle is atrum intermixed with magma, every spreading rift in the ocean also constantly pumps out rivers of atrum, which 1. plays an important role in moving and mixing waters to sustain those pockets of nutrient-rich waters where marine life flourishes in the equatorial regions, and 2. slowly but steadily spawns diluvian grimm. the VAST majority of grimm in the world are sea monsters born from these underwater rivers :)

[icarianncarrionn]

🐆

Bc the majority of my muses are related I feel like a fairytale king going here look at my beautiful daughters- (i was also definitely gonna ask if you had other muses i might not know about and then i didnt so it’s a buffet for trent)

Trent - Geetha

She’s like if a frightened deer was an extremely gifted doctor. She’s actually a paediatric surgeon but I am the boss of her so we can put her in a situation where she is looking after him and finds out about His Condition. Her dad comes from a big Stampede family too, so reason for her to be at a rodeo and see him get up suspiciously easily hmm? Consider.

Trent - Tisha

A human weirdness detector who is absolutely definitely going to die young due to a Bad Supernatural Thing please do not make her show her math she will cry. Generally nomadic and sticks to people to make Weird Art out of them so I can in fact see him pinging her radar and winding up with a deeply odd little woman following him around.

Trent - Dino

I don’t know how active he will ever be bc he’s only popped up as a secondary character in threads. Finance bro, short king, kind of a fuckboy, does want to settle down but like come on give him two more years of fucking around. Probably calls guys he’s hooked up with “bro”.

Trent - Rosie

Such a test muse she barely exists outside of a Concept (extremely socially awkward goth embalmer at a funeral home)

[gurokichi]

good afternoon! did you know that blood stains plastic? unfortunately i had to learn thay today. i feel very sorry for whoever sits at my table next year. hopefully they'll think its something else. i thought about and decided that i do not like the metal penguin. he's too mean!! he keeps throwing bombs at me. i also might not fail math. i think. what are you doing right now? other than responding to this ask, obviously. i'm asking, in, like, future tense, so whenever you're responding to this ask you have to answer this question, not when you read it. does that make sense? i want to carve your cheeks out and turn them into squish toys. they'd be such great stress relievers, trust!! i'm currently listening to space age bachelor man from ride the cyclone. i love ride the cyclone! it's my favourite musical. it has some really silly moments, and also made me cry at the end. which is something you want in a musical! the goal is to evoke emotion from the watcher, whether that be through profoundly sad moments or the lyrics 'MEEEOWWWW! MEEOWWWWW! MEEOWWWWW! MEOWWWW~ MEEEEOWWWW!~ MEOWWWWWW! MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW!' which is what is playing right now into my ears. ricky isn't my favourite character, though. that would be the one and only mischa bachinsky, professional bad sound cloud rapper with largely positive reviews in his comments. in his own words, 'this song is awesome. my life is awesome. this beat is awesome. autotune is awesome!'. you heard the man!! his song is awesome. i really love Talia. OH CONSTANCE IS SO FUNNY karnak's voice is so calming. wait i'm sorry i don't think you know anyone i'm talking about 😭 karnak is a sentient fortune telling robot machine at a carnival and his gimmick is that he can predict the exact time date and place of your death. he used to tell those who visited his booth that information, but it wasn't a very family-friendly and fun experience, so he was set to another mode where he still knows how they die but he can't tell them. he's pretty much the narrator for the musical. OH MY SOUULLLLLL. sorry ballad of Jane doe started playing i love Jane doe!! she's headless. i've drawn fanart for her before. she loses her head while falling off the roller coaster. if you fell off a roller coaster would you let me have your head? i'd use it as a centerpiece for the dinner table. like in the spot where a vase of flowers would usually go. ooh, maybe i could put flowers in your eye sockets. it would be fun OH WHY OH WHY OH WHYYY! also people would think it's cool and I'd be like hahahahah yes it is very cool wanna know where i got it 🥰🥰 and then i could show it off. but then your skin and hair would start falling off, which is unfortunate. maybe i could embalm your head. does that prevent rot? oh, well. rip my search history. the seat i'm sitting on is such a pretty shade of pink is the seat you're sitting on a pretty shade of pink too?? and by that i mean whenever you respond to this ask, which will probably be difficult because i'm not really asking anything. i'm just stating things as if you'll understand. so perhaps i should ask something hmm. OH WAIT but i asked you whether you'd let me keep your head. i'll ask you something else too, then. hmmmm. if i were to forge your signature (which i HAVE) on a legal document saying that you've sold your soul to me would that be weird. for no particular reason!!!!! anyways my stop is here now BYEEEE!!! <33

-👤

Good afternoon! Although… it’s morning where you are, so should I say good morning instead? Hm. I will just stick to saying good afternoon to match what you said, and then I will text you good morning!!

Also, oh dear 😭😭😭 NOO, don’t hate Bonbon. He’s just a silly lil guy!! A robot penguin with a tophat!! How could you not like Bonbon? I think it’s just a skill issue… would not be a problem if you dodge the bombs. It’s not his fault either! It’s the people who play him who are throwing the bombs at you, not him. Grrr. You worked hard with studying, so I’m sure you’ll do fine in math! I’m not doing much… I’m just in bed on my phone. Trying 2 catch up on my inbox. After I’m done, though, I’m probably gonna watch Demon Slayer or continue playing P5R. Also, your question made sense!! I don’t even remember what I was doing last night, so I couldn’t have answered with that anyway. You are NOT carving my cheeks out. They would not make good stress toys pretty quickly… I also prefer my cheeks on my face. I still need to check Ride the Cyclone out for you, so that I actually know what you’re talking about. ALSO, I REMEMBER YOU PUTTING THAT QUOTE FROM YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTER AS YOUR STATUS ON DISCORD. Yippee, now I know where it is from!! Also, how’d the robot become sentient and get the ability to predict deaths? Does that get explained, or is the guy just like that?? Would love to get my death predicted… that is so lame they stopped letting him smh!! You could have my head if I fell off a rollercoaster. What flowers would you put in my eye sockets? I actually have no idea if you can embalm a head. I am jealous that you are sitting on a pretty pink seat. I am sitting on my boring gray bed. Would much prefer a pretty pink seat. Preferably one that is next to your pretty pink seat. Don’t worry, I do understand what you’re saying! Would giggle if I saw you forge my signature on something like that. I don’t think you can even do that, so my soul would still be mine I’m pretty sure. BYE BYE ERIS!! (^O^)／

[pumpkingeorge]

Me searching for another job:

I want to try something easy that doesn’t have math or require talking to people. Let’s look at cemetery groundskeeping.

“So…Funeral Director?”

Uh, no. I’m not educated.

“Okay, embalmer!”

I’m not educated. I can’t do that.

“Right, so…chaplain?”

No.

“Pastor?”

No. No church jobs.

“…Wanna join the military?”

No.

“I got it! City planner!”

That’s not even related to what I’m looking for!

“What did you want again?”

Cemetery Groundskeeper or something. I can use a lawnmower and a weed whacker. I’m respectful of the dead and if I learn how to use an excavator I can dig the graves too.

“Alright, gotcha. I have something like that! How do you feel about becoming a police officer?”

I don’t want to-

“Looks like you can make 100k!”

Oink? 🐷

[littleeyesofpallas]

really craving a deck builder resource management RPG about being a necromancer raising your undead army and there being a big modular system of corpse stats with different utilities, so that there are distinct differences in the uses and benefits of like, a corpse over a skeleton, or a fresh corpse over a rotting one, or one that died of bodily trauma vs one that died of disease vs one that died of malnourishment, or one found exposed to the elements vs one entombed, or the differences between a corpse preserved by embalming or mummification or mellification, and then also like the ability to raid a church and steal reliquaries for corpse bits that have cool special divine attributes. So that even if every players kind of has to dabble in a bit of everything, the increasing scale of your army reveals distinct styles of battle and acquisiton and upkeep based on the majority build of you army. So in a weird mix of like Warcraft and Fireemblem in terms of gamefeel(actually that's just Ogre Battle isn't it?) you get to have the satisfying experience of marching your army into a place and watch the math play out as you lose units but gain new corpses, and tactically aim your next conquest based on what kinds of corpses different targets yield, in order to most smoothly steam roll your way across a map with exponentially increase adversaries.

[sewiders]

Hey please feel free to totally ignore this ask if it's disrespectful or bothersome in any way but how are you going to become a mortifician/funeral director I have always been interested on the field but in my home country it's not very accessible so I'm just wondering how your experience has been if you wish to share

Hi ! This is gonna come from my experience in southwestern America as an indigenous Guatemalan! I am just starting my journey as I only decided this career path around two years ago. I have had a hard time in school growing up due to unchecked and untreated illnesses so I did drop out in high-school, I am getting my GED, which is equivalent to a highschool diploma. I pay to take official state tests for Language Arts, Math, Science, History and Civics. I very fortunately live next to one of the only community colleges that teach mortuary sciences in my state, I can share the courses you take there in a reblog (lots of screenshots), you only need your associates in my state, all they really care about is that you have a license to practice. What you learn in the classes are: - Explain the importance of funeral service professionals in developing relationships with the families and communities they serve.

-Identify standards of ethical conduct in funeral service practice.

-Interpret how federal, state, and local laws apply to funeral service in order to ensure compliance.

-Apply principles of public health and safety in the handling and preparation of human remains.

-Demonstrate technical skills in embalming and restorative art that are necessary for the preparation and handling of human remains.

-Demonstrate skills required for conducting arrangement conferences, visitations, services, and ceremonies.

-Describe the requirements and procedures for burial, cremation, and other accepted forms of final disposition of human remains.

-Describe methods to address the grief-related needs of the bereaved.

-Explain management skills associated with operating a funeral establishment. 

-Demonstrate verbal and written communication skills and research skills needed for funeral service practice. 

It vastly varies college to college and even state to state on how you learn things. At the college I will go to they get one body per semester donated to them to show how to handle and cremate a body, then how to handle ashes. This is more important for where I live because our cremation rate is about 80%. I've been told you can just become an embalmer by doing some of the classes, but funeral directors are in higher demand as they can embalm and do everything else. One of the finals in the course is facial reconstruction, where you pick a celebrity, someone you know, or even yourself and reconstruct that person's face as if you were reconstructing and restoring a body's face for their funeral. After you get your funeral license, you will need to get an accredited apprenticeship at a funeral home or with a mortician. A lot of this really depends on where you live. A well known mortician lives in my state and I have personally talked to her, she offers scholarships for women and trans people going into the field, and offers apprenticeships for after college.

That is more of the technical stuff, there is a lot of other stuff that applies a lot to American funeral homes and businesses. At least for here, most funeral homes are a family business and if you are not already in that line of inheritance you're gonna have a harder time finding a job. There is also a lot of discrimination in the field, I have been told since I am bipoc/brown, I will have a harder time finding a job, and I have to add being trans and disabled onto that. I was told by a mortician who is also bipoc and a woman that it took her two years to find a funeral home that was willing to work with her, and it was a funeral home ran by a gay couple. I was told to be prepared for more no's than yes'. The culture around the funeral industry has changed a lot recently, especially around different burial methods, what's better for the earth, and the prices of things such as caskets and burial plots. The known mortician i got to talk to is Monica Torres, she specializes in embalming and facial and cranial reconstruction, she is also known as Cold Hands in the community.

There is alot more and you can always send another ask with specific questions or even dm me, and sorry if this is everywhere as im very ill rn haha.

[axl-ul]

Happy WBW! I know it's summer, but we're going back to school! What does the education system look like in your world? Is it standardized or trade based? Required or for certain people only?

Hi, Tori!^^

When it comes to education itself, I haven't given it much thought. During Ulfrika's childhood, she and her sisters were taught the basics about herbs, fighting, wildlife and so on by their caretaker/master, but writing and reading wasn't included. Only Ulfrika got lessons on those but only in the ancient language the first embalmers used. After Master Kogar's death, Ulfrika and Márgerdra had learn on their own.

However, the OCs that were born in more recent times (1920s and later) got the education which was more or less expected. That means the typical schools and such.

Sooooo, the older cast/OCs were taught by their Masters, who very EXTREMELY picky when choosing their successors and apprentices, in the spheres of hunting, sorcery of some sorts, martial arts, medicine and more religious stuff while the OCs closer to our age attended the regular schools with Maths, P.E., History etc. and pretty much for everybody. But there's no specific type of educational system I've been working on.

[totally-correct-idv]

Mike, trying to do a crossword because norton said he was stupid: whats a four letter word for something hard?

Eli: rock

Norton: math

Aesop: life

Naib: dick

[personshapedsplder]

Would I be a good mortician...... 🤔🤔🤔