#elephant super car wash | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

vampiregirl1797 · 5 years ago

Text

You’re My Eternal Love

Edward Cullen x Reader

GIF Not Mine.

Warnings: Self-depreciation, pining, minor angst, major fluff. Bella isn’t nice in this one guys.

Word count: 14,843—super long so be sure to grab yourself some snacks and a cuppa tea!

Click Here For My Masterlist.

Summary: Bella and Y/N go to Italy to stop Edward from committing suicide. It’s going to be a difficult excursion for more reasons than Y/N can possibly imagine. For starters, she doesn’t possess the same mind defences as her sister, meaning she’s much more vulnerable to the gifts of Aro and Jane. But that isn’t going to stop her from helping to save the man she’s secretly in love with. She’s done a very good job at keeping it quiet so far, especially with Edward’s ability to read her thoughts. Y/N is well aware that she’s risking her life, but as long as Edward’s is saved, her own existence is of little consequence to her. The danger, she’s prepared for, but to have more revealed than she’s ready to reveal is going to be the hardest part. Everything has the potential to fall to pieces, but will it? Also let’s pretend that Bella is a year younger, putting her in junior year and Y/N in senior year.

I took a deep breath as I processed everything that I’d just been told. Edward had gone to the Volturi—Vampire royalty who created and enforced rules that everyone belonging to that species must follow—in order to end his own life. I internally cursed my sister’s recklessness.

‘Let’s just jump off the cliff, Y/N. What’s the worst that could happen?’

She’d dragged me along to keep her company on LA Push beach as she waited for Jake—her new love interest—to finish his wolf patrol and meet her. The werewolf had forewarned her that he’d probably be late, so I was a means to avoid boredom. If she hadn’t played the sister card, I wouldn’t have gone. If I’d just ignored her insistence at trying another reckless activity, this wouldn’t be happening. Edward would be living his immortal life danger free in… wherever the hell he had been. But no, Bella had insisted that it would be a rush, something Jake had got her hooked onto after she’d bought him some bikes to fix up as an excuse to spend some time with him. She’d gone first, even though I’d still been trying to talk her out of it, and I’d waited anxiously on the cliff edge for her face to break the surface of the angry blue sea so that my nerves would fade. But that hadn’t happened. She didn’t come up, and stupidly, I’d gone after her. If I’d stopped to think logically I would have realized that I was human, too. If Bella hadn’t been able to fight the waves to escape the ocean, why would I have a chance? I should have screamed for help, perhaps loud enough for some of the resident werewolves to hear if they were nearby.

Unfortunately, logic and reasoning goes out of the window when someone you love, when your sister, is in danger. So without thought, only glaring panic echoing throughout my veins, I’d jumped in, the ice-cold water encasing me like a predator caging its prey. Again, if I’d been calm enough to be rational, I wouldn’t have wasted the precious energy I’d had frantically searching, my arms slashing as fast as they could through the dark abyss of water. Any attempts to locate my sister had failed and in a moment of sheer stupidity, I’d opened my mouth, as if to call out her name. The water rushing into my mouth and down into my lungs had been the last thing I remembered as I closed my eyes and allowed death to claim me.

When I’d woken up on the beach, my lungs burning and throat raw, with Sam Uley standing over me I’d been disorientated. But the wave of realization washed over me with more ferocity than the waves had, and I was soon frantically looking around for Bella. She had been fine, sat over on a fallen log about twenty feet away on Jacob’s lap. He was holding her close and I’d remembered the shot of betrayal that shot through my heart like an arrow at her lack of concern. It burned like I’d been branded with a constant reminder of how little my sister appeared to care for me. When I looked back to the alpha werewolf, to thank him for saving my life, he’d told me I was welcome without taking his disapproving eyes off Bella. That had been the first time my defensive hackles hadn’t rose at the sight of someone criticizing my family—I was always in her corner, but in that moment, I couldn’t bring myself to even muster up an insincere effort. Sam had taken me home, not addressing the elephant in the car, and I waited until I was in the security of my bedroom to let the tears fall.

I had been starting to wonder if anyone—other than Charlie and Renée even cared about me. I thought the Cullen’s had loved me like family, I knew I had loved, still loved, them in that manner. All but one. I banished that thought from my head and returned to my original thought. If my own sister didn’t care if I lived or died, then how could I be sure that any of the Cullen’s had loved me like I loved them? That particular thought had me wallowing in self-pity for most of the day and after I’d showered, I’d basically collapsed into my bed and allowed exhaustion to claim me. Apparently almost dying really took it out of you.

I’d woken to my shoulder being shaken by something very cold and as if my depressing thoughts had conjured them—well one of them—Alice Cullen had been stood there with a relieved and confused expression on her face. I’d told her everything that happened and she filled me in on some of the things the Cullen’s had been up to, though her details on Edward were minimal. I assumed that was because she didn’t want me to potentially pass on information that would hurt my sister, so I didn’t comment, though I myself was secretly relieved. Information on the boy who’d never known—would never know—that I loved him was just too much for me to handle. Bella had joined us well past dark and had a much more resigned reunion with the pixie haired Cullen. I’d been confused at her lack of enthusiasm, but she was polite enough and agreed with my insistence that Alice should stay with us for at least a few days before she left again. But she didn’t seem to care either way, and I found myself irked by that before a thought entered my mind: what if the presence of Edward’s sister was bringing up memories that were simply too difficult for her to bear? I softened marginally after considering that, but not much.

But apparently, that hadn’t been the reason for her indifference at all, as while Alice stood in front of where Bella and I were sat on the small couch in our home, my sister couldn’t appear less interested in what the psychic vampire was saying to us. I felt my first spark of anger then, but I pushed it down knowing that I needed to convince her to come with us, otherwise we’d have no hope of saving him, and the possibility of that hurt too much for me to consider it for more than half a second.

‘Bella, we have to go. This is Edward we’re talking about, you owe it to him to let him know you’re alive at the very least.’ I insisted, I knew my eyes were most likely burning with panic that she wouldn’t go and anger that she looked between the vampire and me as if we were discussing the weather forecast.

Something in my expression must have convinced her, or maybe she realized that if Alice wanted to get her to Italy, she would be able to very easily whether she wanted to go or not. Either way, I ran to my room and frantically packed two backpacks, one for each of us, full of essentials before I returned to the living room where Alice was already waiting. Bella pulled on her jacket and took her designated backpack without complaint or haste while I retrieved our passports from the drawer in the kitchen. I scribbled out a note to Charlie explaining that Alice, Bella and I were taking an impromptu trip to Seattle to spend some quality girl time together before Alice left again. I apologized for the timing but promised that we’d be in touch. I scribbled down Alice’s cell number and signed our names. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too mad, or worried, but I knew those hopes were fruitless because of course he would be. But I didn’t let that concern me as I slid into Alice’s car, at least not while I had bigger concerns on my mind. I ignored the screeching of the tires as she gunned the accelerator and sat back in my seat, eyes closing as I tried to pacify myself with imagining Edward happy and most importantly… alive.

This had better work.

When we finally arrived in Volterra, the heart of the Volturi city, Bella had been sent off to the clock tower while Alice and I made our way to them through the shadows. I had lost sight of her in all the pedestrians wearing read from head to toe, and I found anxiety swirling in my stomach as I hoped she moved with more urgency than she’d been showing all day. If Edward exposed himself and died because Bella didn’t move with enough haste… I wasn’t sure I’d be able to forgive her.

We located them in the alley underneath the clock tower, but neither looked happy to be in one another’s presence. In fact, Bella looked down right pissed and Edward wasn’t far off, either. The only difference in his behaviour was that his eyes held relief alongside the anger. Despite what I was sure would turn into a lover’s reunion that would wound me irreparably, I couldn’t find it within myself to care because Edward was okay. I leaped into his arms as soon as I’d saw him, not giving it a second thought as my own relief overpowered me and controlled my actions without permission.

Before any words could be spoken between the four of us, two vampires joined us in the shadows. Their names were revealed to be Demetri and Felix and I felt myself tense as they revealed that the Volturi wanted to see all of us. My eyes flitted to my sister and away again before I gave away any weakness. She might not have cared for my well being, but I certainly cared for hers. I didn’t try to fight the sheer panic and anxiety that formed in my gut as we were herded underground by the two male vampires and the other female, Jane, that had joined us moments after. What was going to happen? They couldn’t have wanted to see Bella and I out of mere curiosity. I felt myself shiver as I realized the implication of our presence—we were going to die. I wondered if there would be any way that I could barter my life to save Bella’s, but why would they even consider that as an option, when they could easily kill us both anyway? It wasn’t like I had something to offer them that they would be interested in. It hit me then; Bella had a better chance of getting out of this than I did, regardless. Her mind defenses made her interesting, and I could only hope that Aro and the others would see potential and allow her to leave if she became immortal. That was what she wanted, anyway. And seeing as she didn’t care if I lived or died, it shouldn’t be too difficult for her to leave me behind to feed the hungry vampires. I fought back a shudder at the thought but felt myself relax with the knowledge that Edward, Alice and Bella had a very good chance of leaving here alive.

I jolted when a cold hand enveloped mine and looked into the black eyes of Edward, gazing at me with a mixture of concern and fury. I wondered what I had done to receive such a reception but I realized that he’d probably been hearing my inner monologue and I felt my lips tilt up into a sheepish smile. I also felt my heart squeeze in hope—if he was angry with me discussing my death with myself so calmly and clinically, maybe he did care for me? Maybe all of the Cullen’s did? Or perhaps his selflessness wouldn’t allow the thought of another sacrificing their own life for his immortal one. I sighed at that thought; it was more likely after all.

It didn’t seem to take long for us to reach the room we were expected in, or maybe it did. I’d been so lost in my own thoughts I hadn’t really been paying attention. If Edward hadn’t taken it upon himself to guide me, I probably would have ended up walking into the back of Jane, not realizing we’d stopped. I definitely would have been dinner then. I blinked myself out of my self inflicted daze and glanced around, noting the medieval structure of the small, circular room. I felt like I’d travelled back in time to the sixteenth century as the interior felt so much like a castle. The grey cobble stones made up the walls from floor to ceiling and I felt myself shiver as the coolness of the room caught up with me. The three vampires we were here to see sat in front of us on three identical wooden thrones. Aro I recognized from the painting I’d been shown once; he sat in the middle. Another dark haired vampire sat in the throne to his right, while a blonde male sat in the seat to his right. Aro looked positively delighted at our appearance, as if we were old friends who’d simply popped in for a friendly visit. I shuddered at the over familiarity and wondered if the recognition in his eyes were because of a gift similar to Alice’s. Did he know we were coming?

He stepped down from his throne, stopping a few feet away from the four of us, clapping his hands together in delight just once before they dropped to his sides. Bella stiffened as his eyes trailed over her with moderate interest, but when they fell on me he positively beamed, much to my confusion. Edward stiffened and gripped my hand tighter, pulling me half a step behind him. I wondered what Aro had thought for him to do that, but I didn’t comment on it, trusting his judgment.

‘No need to fret, Edward. I simply wished to introduce myself to your… friend.’ I frowned at his emphasis on that word, his tone implied that he knew something I didn’t, which didn’t make any sense.

‘I understand Bella is immune to your abilities, but Y/N is not. After seeing her from your mind, your point of view, I am more than curious to see inside this particular humans head.’ He practically purred and I wondered if I would lose my head if I told him to fuck off. Probably.

‘What are your abilities exactly?’ I asked, my voice no more than a murmur, but that wasn’t a problem for my present company.

‘Aro can read every thought your mind has ever had with just one touch.’ Edward told me, his eyes remaining on the ancient vampire stood before us but his head tilted in my direction to avoid miscommunication.

I felt my eyes widen in horror and I spoke without thinking, ‘absolutely not.’

That only seemed to pique his interest more, if that were possible. His dark iris’s positively gleamed and he took half a step forward, pausing at the growl that left Edward’s throat. I felt my heart skip a beat at the sound, not out of fear, but surprise.

‘It’s nothing to fear, child. Just one touch, it’s completely painless and I must say, your reluctance has me wondering what you’re so eager to hide.’ He grinned and I wanted to scream.

‘I’m not worried about pain; I’m more worried about invasion of privacy. Edward I’m used to, at least with him I only have to worry about what he hears when he’s around, but for you to hear everything, things that are supposed to be private… well I can’t say I like the idea.’ I ran my free hand through my hair, stressed because I knew that Aro seeing all of my thoughts would mean that Edward would be able to read them at the same time.

Everything I’d worked so hard to hide would be laid out on a silver platter. A wave of nausea washed over me and Edward held me tighter to his side, I felt myself relax as the cold chased away the sudden bought of sickness but my fear remained. But as I met Aro’s eyes again, I could see his patience wavering. Him “asking” had never really been him offering a choice, it had been him attempting to allude to a sense of security that I knew he wouldn’t deliver. I had no options in this. Not really. I sighed and stepped forward so that I was now half a step in front of the vampire who still had a hold on me, in more ways than one. I held out my free hand, palm up and tried not to wince when the black haired vampire was suddenly stood right in front of me, taking my thoughts greedily. His eyes glazed over as if he were suddenly somewhere else and I tried to hold back the sheer terror attempting to break free by distracting myself at how different each vampire’s skin felt. Edward’s was as cool as marble but some how soft—Aro’s felt like sandpaper that had been pulled from the freezer. I longed to release his hand but I knew it would be pointless to even try; I’d probably cause myself more harm. So I stood there for what felt like hours as Aro sifted through every thought I’d ever had with the look of a reader flicking through their favourite book. When he did release me, his eyes not quite yet returning to reality, Edward scooped me up and put a three-foot gap between me and Aro before I’d fully registered that I was even freed from the sand paper touch. I avoided Edward’s expression, afraid of what I would see now that he knew what I’d been keeping to myself for so long. Despite the panic that my feelings were most definitely going to complicate everything, I couldn’t help the small echo of relief at him, at someone, finally knowing the secret I’d buried deep inside myself. Even if one of those people was a member of the deadliest coven in the world.

‘So… fascinating!’ He yelled with childlike glee, his eyes flickering between Edward and I, ‘to see how much you pine for one another, how much pain could have been avoided by simple communication!’

I frowned, confused and despite my head telling me not to, I looked up to the vampire still holding me to see his expression completely blank and void of emotion. I sighed in annoyance, wishing I could read his mind like he could so easily read mine. Aro must have misunderstood. There is simply no way that the godlike perfection of Edward Cullen would pine after me when he was so enraptured with my sister.

‘You don’t believe me, do you child?’ Aro’s voice caused me to look back over to him and I felt unnerved at the smug, knowing expression he wore.

‘You believe his heart lies with her.’ His eyes left mine to look over to the only other human in the room, his eyes narrowing in what appeared to be distaste before his dark gaze was once again back on me, ‘you believe he came here to end his own life because Bella jumped into the water.’

I felt a flash of irritation through the confusion that was swirling through my belly. I wanted an explanation over what the hell was going on, but I didn’t want it from him. I wanted it from the vampire standing next to me, the vampire who hadn’t yet relaxed his tense and protective stance beside me. I looked past Alice, who was stood next to Edward, to my sister and wondered why she didn’t seem as confused as I did. But there was no emotion on her face. She wasn’t angry at me potentially being in love with her ex-boyfriend. If anything she looked uninterested and I briefly wondered if she loved the werewolf more than I’d realized. I’d thought he was just a rebound, after all how could anyone truly replace the incredible person she had lost due to his desire to keep her safe? Evidently, I was wrong. Bella was over Edward, perhaps more than I’d realized, and I wondered for the first time if she’d ever even missed him. If the haze she’d briefly slipped into upon his departure hadn’t been depression as I’d originally thought, but rather indifference. The answer hit me like a slap in the face.

She’d never loved him.

That was why it had been so easy for her to carry on as if nothing had happened. That was why she didn’t care about Edward potentially killing himself. I wondered then if I’d simply been deluding myself for the months they were together, if I’d merely been projecting the way I’d felt about the vampire onto my sister, because I couldn’t imagine why anyone wouldn’t love him with every fiber of their being.

But if that was the case, why had they dated for so long? Why had Edward left to protect her, if there had been no love between them to begin with?

I sighed, looking back up to Edward again, appraising his expression carefully, but it was no use. He was a master of control—he simply looked calm, emotionless and I felt like I wanted to scream in frustration. I wanted an explanation from him. I wanted to know what was going on, definitely, but I didn’t want to hear Edwards’s thoughts edited by Aro. I wanted to hear them directly, from the horse’s mouth, so to speak. But it didn’t look like I had a choice because Aro was only too delighted to relay what he’d seen like he was re-accounting his favorite TV show for those who’d missed it, and Edward was frozen still.

‘The most interesting part about it all is your unwillingness to admit your feelings for her, Edward, despite the fact you feel so… broken without her around.’ He tusked as he thought, most likely flicking through all he had seen, ‘you—.’

I blinked in surprise when Edward finally unfroze, his eyes turning to me for the first time in what felt like years. I was taken aback by the emotion swirling in his dark, thirsty eyes and found myself unable to look away as he spoke, his soft voice wrapping around me like velvet.

‘You’re right, I do owe you an explanation and I will give it to you.’ He took an unnecessary breath, ‘your sister’s blood isn’t the blood that is irresistible to me, yours is. I dated Bella as a way of having an excuse to be near you, without being too close. I didn’t trust myself, you see, and when your sister got hurt all I saw was how easy it would be for you to be fatally injured because of me. I couldn’t bear it. That’s why I left; I figured it would be what was best for you. You didn’t know how I felt, how much I love you—your life would be untouched by me, and you’d be able to live the normal, happy life you deserved.’

I could feel the surprise on my face, but my thoughts were spinning too fast for me to worry about my expression in that moment. Could he care about me enough to fake a relationship in order to assure I was protected from himself? I couldn’t believe it, and yet I could. I’d have be stupid to ignore the love shining in his eyes as he looked at me, to disregard the gentle and tender way that he held me. Edward loved me. My heart like it was going to expand out of my chest as I thought I love you, Edward. I always have and I always will. His eyes softened, and before him I never would have believed that black eyes could be gentle, but they were and I felt myself melting into his touch, not caring about our audience.

There was still so much we needed to talk about, like why Bella had gone along with the relationship—she would have known that Edward’s love wasn’t genuine, that I was sure of, my sister was anything but unobservant—so why hadn’t she said anything first? I’d also needed to lecture Edward on keeping his feelings from me, on coming to Italy to end his—God, I couldn’t even finish the thought—but I was aware that there was a possibility that I wasn’t going to leave here alive. And strangely, I couldn’t bring myself to muster up too much panic over that. Knowing Edward loved me as I loved him? That was all I needed to die happy. Maybe that sounded crazy, but it was the truth. I noticed Edward’s eyes harden at the turn my thoughts had taken and he held me tighter against his side, his body once again becoming very still. His change in behaviour seemed to heighten the tension in the air, tension that I’d been blind to as we’d been lost in our own bubble for who knows how long, but I was very aware of it now.

‘Right, well obviously we have a matter to discuss and a verdict to come to.’ Aro smiled, his face suddenly malicious as he thought over what he could accuse us of to justify our deaths.

I only hoped Bella, Alice and Edward would leave here alive. After all, the two vampires hadn’t broken any laws after all and Bella had the excuse of already knowing about vampires because of her werewolf boyfriend.

‘I don’t see how any punishments should be administered, Aro.’ Edward spoke up, his voice full of confidence and assertiveness, though his expression remained as expressionless as stone, ‘no rules were broken.’

The blonde vampire in one of the three thrones spoke up for the first time, his long, bony finger pointing at me and then Bella as he spoke, ‘that is not true. You’ve exposed our secrets to humans. They know too much, they must either be turned or destroyed.’

‘Yes, Caius I would agree with you, when it comes to Y/N, but Bella is a little more complicated, I’m afraid.’ Aro pursed his lips, placing his hands to his face in a prayer potion that I was too on edge to find irony in, ‘she cohorts with werewolves, our natural enemies, and therefore her knowledge of our existence can be justified.’

I breathed a sigh of relief at that and tried to ignore the smug smile that formed on my sister’s lips. Aro’s dark eyes turned to me next and I felt a shiver slither down my spine.

‘Y/N, with you my brother is correct. Humans are merely forbidden to know of our existence, except for unique circumstances, of course,’ his eyes flickered to Bella and back to me so quickly that I wondered if I’d imagined it, ‘unless Edward is willing for you to become immortal and prove it, then unfortunately you’ll die here today.’

A growl rumbled in Edward’s chest at the threat behind the ancient vampire’s words and he held me tighter. I knew what I wanted. It was something I’d dreamed of more than once, to be with him forever. Of course the happy feeling my dream inspired was often chased away with guilt when I regained consciousness, but the desire still remained, no matter how wrong I believed it to be at the time. But now, it was possible. I could be with Edward for eternity, if he would have me. I wouldn’t want to force myself on him forever if he didn’t really want me, after all what was to say he wouldn’t lose interest within a few months of us actually being in a relationship? He could easily grow bored with me, and soon realize that I wasn’t interesting, or funny or beautiful. He would realize he didn’t love me after all, and the thought of that was so painful that the thought of dying by the hands of the Volturi didn’t seem so bad. I’d rather die now than expect an eternity with the man I loved, only for him to discard of me when he realized I wasn’t good enough for him. Because I wasn’t, was I? My heart sank with the realization and a sigh fell past my lips. I opened my mouth to tell them to kill me, because I loved Edward too much to force him into an eternity with me that he’d probably never considered, or wanted. But Alice’s voice, soft as wind chimes, injected into the conversation for the first time. I noticed Aro’s delight as the younger Cullen spoke up.

‘She will be one of us. I’ve seen it. I can show you, if you’d like.’ She held out her hand, the same way I had, but somehow with much more grace. Aro stepped forward and took it eagerly, his eyes un-focusing and a look of sheer enjoyment freezing on his face.

I took his distraction as an opportunity to look up to Edward, my eyes pausing on the dark circles underneath his orbs and wondering just how long he’d gone without feeding. He looked incredibly thirsty and I felt my heart twist in concern. His eyes met mine, soft as melted licorice and smiled a small, gentle smile that had my heart stuttering in my chest. I thought he might grin at the reaction, but Aro’s gasp of wonder drew our attention and I looked over to see him taking me in with an appreciative gleam in his eyes.

‘I can see that there are no issues at all.’ He grinned, but it didn’t offer any comfort, ‘you are free to go, we ask only that you do not linger in the city.’

‘That won’t be a problem.’ Edward’s voice was polite, but the hostility behind his speech was still present, even if it was only the slightest hint.

I looked over to Aro, managing a glimpse before Edward steered me away, and I wondered if he’d been able to sense he anger behind his words. It didn’t seem like it—he was smiling like a cat that ate the cream, no trace of offence on his expression at all. I leaned further into Edward’s hold as we escaped back through the way we came, Alice and Bella trailing behind us. It didn’t take us long to reach the streets and after the younger Cullen had retrieved our bags from wherever she’d stashed them earlier, we climbed into the new car she’d managed to steal. Bella sat in the passenger seat while Edward and I took the back. I marveled at how natural it felt to be in the vampire’s arms, it was if I belonged there and I tentatively wondered if it felt the same for him.

‘Are you okay?’ my fingers carefully traced the dark circles underneath his eyes that hinted at the discomfort he was probably feeling.

He took my fingers in his free hand and bought them to his lips, kissing them before entwining our hands together. My heart stuttered in my chest and he smiled, ‘I’m perfectly fine, better than fine actually.’ His face went to my hair and I could hear him inhale my scent, a contented noise falling from his lips.

‘I know what you mean.’ I murmured, turning my face into the crook of his neck and inhaling his sweet, addictive scent. I’d never been this close before—in the past I’d only ever caught a whiff as he walked past me, or reached over me to grab something, but now I was surrounded by his wonderful smell and I found myself pleasantly overwhelmed.

‘By the way, we will talk about those absurd thoughts you were having earlier. Don’t think I’ll forget.’ His voice was low as he murmured in my ear, the promise behind his words made me shiver and I wondered what thoughts he was talking about.

‘Okay,’ I agreed, knowing he’d have to be near me to have that conversation, and I still wasn’t completely convinced that he wasn’t going to change his mind on a whim.

A small rumble sounded in his chest, but it wasn’t threatening, it was more a sound of frustration and I wondered if his thirst was bothering him more than he wanted me to know. I was just thinking about moving off his lap—honestly I couldn’t even remember how I’d got there—but he was holding me tighter before I could even complete the thought. I didn’t fight him, trusting that he knew his own thirst and restrictions better than I did, and it wasn’t like I was uncomfortable, so I decided to appreciate his closeness, not knowing when I’d get the chance again. My eyes fluttered shut as I worked to commit the moment to memory—the way he felt against me, hard, cold and comforting, the way he smelled, sweet, wonderful and soothing. I was so dedicated to my attempt at committing that moment to memory, that unconsciousness fell over me without warning, but in the arms of the man I loved I couldn’t help but feel anything other than content.

Waking up was a disorientating experience. I was still in a car, but it was different somehow, and I wasn’t conscious enough to figure out why that was or how I’d been moved without being woken. I was still in Edward’s cold, comforting hold and I found myself wanting to fall back into unconsciousness, more tired than I realized, but I heard voices that I wasn’t expecting. My eyes fluttered open and I glanced around, shying away from the brightness outside of the car window and hiding my face into Edward’s neck for a moment to give my eyes time to adjust. I couldn’t resist a discrete inhale while I was there and I felt myself relax further into his arms before I lifted my head again, looking to the driver. I frowned in confusion when I saw a bulky, brawny frame instead of Alice; I was even more confused to see blonde hair over the passenger headrest instead of my sister’s brunette head.

‘How long have I been out?’ My voice sounded scratchy and I found myself wishing I had a bottle of water to soothe it. I settled for clearing my throat and swallowing a few times instead.

‘Just over ten hours.’ Edward’s musical voice answered, soft and soothing as his lips found my hair. My heart sped up and he chuckled quietly, his eyes fluttering shut as if he were savoring the sound.

‘Where’s Bella?’

‘She’s in the other car with Alice, Jasper, Carlisle and Esme. Rosalie wanted to ride with us to try and apologise, of course your unconsciousness didn’t really help her there.’ He chuckled again, a mixture of amused and angry.

I frowned, ‘I’m clearly missing something here.’

‘Alice didn’t tell you how I heard about her vision?’ he looked down to me, continuing when he found the answer in my head, his voice bleak, ‘Rosalie tracked me down to tell me what Alice saw. I called to see if it was true and a boy… Jacob? Answered the phone and told me Charlie was planning the funeral.’

That was news to me, I hadn’t even known there had been a phone call, or that Jacob had even been over that day. I’d come down stairs to find Alice stood in the middle of the living room, frozen with horror and Bella sat on the couch, confused and a little annoyed. All I’d known was that Edward had gone to Italy to— I shuddered, unable to finish the thought—that was all I needed to know. The why or how didn’t matter to me, I just knew I’d needed to stop him. My hold on his shoulders tightened as relief overcame me—we’d succeeded, he was fine, safe.

‘Y/N?’ Rosalie’s voice bought me out of my thoughts and I looked over to her, my eyes softening at the remorse I saw in her honey colored eyes, ‘I’m so terribly sorry that my rashness resulted in you having to risk your life, but I will never be able to thank you adequately for being brave enough to save my brother. I certainly don’t deserve it, but I hope you can forgive me.’

‘Of course I forgive you, Rosalie. How or why doesn’t mean anything to me, all I cared about was making sure Edward left Italy alive. That’s all that matters.’ I gripped him tighter to prove my point and my eyes fluttered shut when his cool lips kissed me behind my ear.

‘Thank you, Y/N.’ Rosalie said, sounding much less troubled, but I suspected that she was going to beat herself up over this for a long time. I offered her what I hoped was a comforting smile.

I wished she wouldn’t, I meant what I said about the how or why not mattering, but if we really considered it, wasn’t this really my fault? I was the one who jumped off that cliff after Bella. I flinched as I remembered waking up on the beach to the alpha being the only one who seemed to care for my wellbeing. Edward’s arms tightened around my waist and a growl rumbled in his chest, clearly not pleased with my sister’s lack of interest in my life. I melted further into him, grateful for how safe his arms made me feel and I found myself selfishly hoping that I wouldn’t lose that. That I wouldn’t lose this feeling… that I wouldn’t lose him. But as I started to recognize the familiar sights that told me were entering Forks, I realized that wouldn’t be possible.

‘I’m not leaving.’ His lips were at my ear, his cool breath making me shiver and feel warm all at once, ‘I promise, I’ll never leave you again, Y/N. Not unless you order me away.’

I turned, looking into his dark eyes and I felt my heart pound at the sincerity that I saw in there, but still doubt crept in. Was he promising me this because he felt indebted to me for saving his life? Not that I thought that was entirely my doing, it had certainly been a group effort, but still… could that be a possibility? His eyes flashed and darkened, something that I wouldn’t have thought achievable as his orbs were already unbelievably black, but the anger dragged them further into the abyss.

‘Like I said, we’ll talk about your thoughts later, when you have time. But for now, you’ve got to go home and check in with Charlie. You’re excuse was a good one so he hasn’t sent out a search party for you… yet.’ His eyes had softened, but the hardness still lingered around the edges.

I blinked, processing his words, ‘I said Alice, Bella and I had gone to Seattle for a few days before she left… won’t he find it odd that I’m being dropped off by you three?’

Edward smiled, ‘you’re not. We’re going back to our house first and Alice will drive the both of you back in the same car she arrived in.’

I nodded—that made sense after all and so there wasn’t anything more to say. I sighed as I thought about being able to have a shower, and brush my teeth. My clothes hadn’t even changed in the days we’d been gone, despite the backpack of essentials I’d packed. It just hadn’t seemed important. All I’d been able to think about, to worry about, was Edward. Showering and changing hadn’t been a priority, at least not for me. I sighed again, this time dejected as I wished the vampire holding me didn’t have to leave, even if it would only be for a few hours.

‘We’ll be back together before you know it. After I’ve changed, hunted and showered—not in that order—I’ll be climbing through your window, I promise.’ His words wrapped around me like a warm blanket on a cool winters night.

‘I believe you.’ I murmured, falling silent again, hoping Charlie didn’t give us too much of an inquisition.

Edward and I had to talk.

Charlie hadn’t had much of a reaction when Bella and I walked through the door. In fact, he didn’t seem perturbed by our arrival at all; he spared us a glance and a mumbled greeting before returning to the game he was watching on TV. I sighed in relief and made my way upstairs while Bella called out that she was heading over to see Jake. Charlie replied with an affirmative and I heard the sound of my sister’s truck starting as I climbed the stairs and headed straight for the bathroom.

The first thing I did was brush my teeth, scrubbing until I was sure all of the grime had been removed and the horrible taste in my mouth had been replaced with mint. Then I’d stripped off my clothes and spent longer than what was probably necessary in the shower. I couldn’t help it—it felt so good to be clean again, and I couldn’t help but revel in the feeling for longer than I usually did. But I eventually washed the last of the suds off my body and the conditioner out of my hair. Satisfied, I wrapped my hair and body in separate towels before heading to my bedroom. After making sure Edward wasn’t already waiting in my room, I dried myself off and quickly dressed in some cotton shorts and an oversized sweater I’d stolen from Charlie a few summers ago. I left my hair down to dry and tossed the damp towels into my laundry hamper along with the clothes I’d worn for who knows how long. I moisturized my face and applied deodorant but didn’t bother with perfume.

Once I was decent I decided to head downstairs to get myself something to eat once I realized that I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d ate something. That might have been a contributing factor to my exhaustion I thought as I pulled out a few slices of left over pizza that Charlie must have ordered while we were gone. I placed them on a plate and then put them in the microwave, pouring myself a glass of milk and sipping on it as I waited. Half of the beverage was gone when the microwave beeped. I pulled the plate out and sat down, chewing quickly but carefully, not wanting to burn myself on the reheated food. It didn’t take long and soon enough my dishes were washed and put away and I was heading back upstairs after calling out a goodnight to my dad.

The smile that formed on my face was wide and involuntary when I saw Edward sat in the centre of my bed, eyes closed and still as a statue. I felt my heart speed up at the sight of him; he looked serene, the dark circles under his eyes now gone, his clothes fresh, and she small smile on his lips hinting at knowledge of my reaction. I stepped into the room, barely registering the door closing behind me and the lock clicking in place. Before I could even blink he was in front of me, taking his hands in mine, the cold temperature of his skin quickly chased away by the warmth his touch bought me. I wondered if it would always be that way, and I found myself hoping it would as he led me to my bed, sitting down next to me and burying his face in my hair.

‘Hmm I will never get used to how wonderfully sweet you smell to me, Y/N.’ His voice was a purr against my neck as he placed a kiss to the hollow of my throat. My eyes closed, the pleasure his touch bought too potent to fight.

‘Before we get too carried away and lost in the moment, there are some things we need to discuss,’ he said, his voice light but I could detect the importance behind his words.

I turned my head to look him in the eyes; the butterscotch color that greeted me was so smooth I felt my heart melting in my chest, as I got lost in his hypnotic gaze. He chuckled, his fingers gently caressing my cheek before his hands found mine as if he were restraining us both in his iron clad grip.

‘There are some thoughts I heard in Volterra and again on the way home that have me concerned.’ His eyes conveyed his worry, ‘the idea that I could ever be bored of you, Y/N, is so ludicrous that I cannot quite put it into words. I have tried to pin point the moment I fell in love with you hundreds, if not thousands of times, but I remain unsuccessful because I cannot remember a time that I didn’t love you with every fiber of my being. I’ve never loved someone like this before, so I have nothing to compare it to, but I’m certain that it isn’t the type of love that you ever grow bored of.’ His disbelief at the notion simply couldn’t be faked, not that well, even by Edward, ‘my reluctance to turn you into a vampire has more to do with me not wanting to risk your soul. I believe that we as creatures are cursed to eternal damnation, that our souls are condemned the moment we are bitten, and to doom you to that same fate… I couldn’t do that to you, Y/N, no matter how wonderful the idea of forever with you is.’

‘You really love me?’ I asked, my voice not holding as much disbelief a once had over the topic, ‘you would have me forever? You’re not saying this because you feel indebted to me?’

He chuckled, his honey eyes dancing with mirth as he lifted a hand to ruffle my hair before dropping it to rest on top of mine again, ‘of course not, silly girl. I wouldn’t pretend to be in love with someone because they saved my life, perhaps I would offer the ability to call in a favour, but that’s it. And as for forever, the idea of it doesn’t sound so daunting if you were there to share it with me, but I wouldn’t, couldn’t do that to you.’

I was silent for a long moment as I took in the sincerity of his words, and the epiphany hit me so quickly and unexpectedly that I felt like I’d been punched in the ribs. I remembered all the times almost eight months ago now, before he left, when I’d swear Edward was staring at me, only to look up and see him looking in the complete opposite direction, with a smile on his face and a soft look in his beautiful golden eyes. I remembered the times that I’d been having a horrible day at school and something small but significant to me had happened to improve my mood—the red velvet cupcake in my locker after I’d got my period in gym—the offer to write me a copy of his notes after I’d been close to tears of frustration at being unable to keep up with the teacher—those were only a few examples, of course. All things he’d done to make my day better, to help me in any way he could. How had I not seen it sooner? Why had I let my own insecurities convince me that I’d never been worthy of his love? Because it was clear to me now, the epiphany cleared my vision and allowed me to see the truth, uncorrupted by my self-destructive thoughts: Edward loved me as much as I loved him. The love in his warm eyes and his dazzling smile confirmed it.

After that topic was discussed we somehow found ourselves lying in my bed. I was underneath the blue sheets while Edward lay on top, the thin cotton providing a little resistance to the cold emanating from the vampire, not that I minded. My head rested against his chest and my right hand was entwined with his left, as we both seemed to delight in playing with each other’s fingers.

‘There’s something I wanted to talk to you about.’ I murmured, keeping my eyes on his hand in mine.

He sighed, already knowing what I was going to ask, I wanted to hear his explanation, to know why he had done what he had done, ‘when Rosalie told me that Alice had a vision of you drowning and I called Charlie and that boy seemed to confirm it, I was beside myself with grief. I’d already been in bad shape, trying to keep away from you, but learning that you were dead… I couldn’t bear it. It may seem an overreaction seeing as you didn’t even know of my feelings for you, but I’ve loved you for so long, and taking myself away from you for your own safety was like losing a part of my heart. It was a constant ache that I couldn’t soothe, but that was nothing to how it felt when I thought you were gone. My heart felt completely and utterly… void, as if you’d taken it with you to whatever afterlife you’d gone. A part of me liked the idea of that, that you had my core with you, wherever you were. But the majority of me was smothered with an emptiness that burned from the inside out, and I knew I couldn’t possibly face an eternity of that feeling. That was why I decided to go to Italy, to end my own life, because I selfishly couldn’t bear the thought of the pain, but also because a small secret part of me hoped we would be reunited in another life. I do believe that our souls are cursed to damnation from the first bite, but that didn’t stop me from wishing that I could see you again, to reveal my feelings…’ he paused, tilting my chin up with a cool, long and gentle finger. He wiped away the tears that had fallen, ‘I’m incredibly grateful that I have had the opportunity to be honest with you and to show you how loved, adored and cherished you are, so long as you want me.’

‘I’ll always want you, Edward.’ I said, my voice ringing with a finality that made his eyes soften with awe, ‘that will never change.’

He didn’t say anything, because nothing needed to be said. After a while, I felt myself fighting sleep, not wanting to miss a moment of the perfect serenity I felt in his company, especially now I was sure it was real. But Edward knew, of course, and he picked up one of the books I had piled on my bedside table and started to quietly read to me, his voice wrapping around the words like velvet, the softness impossible to resist. I found myself idly wondering how he knew that his voice relaxed me to the point of contentedness, but I was too far-gone to voice it as sleep claimed me.

‘This is ridiculous! Who cares about a play Shakespeare wrote two hundred years ago?’ I groaned, my head hitting the desk in front of me with more force than necessary, but I hardly noticed the pain—Othello had already given me a headache, what was a little more?

Edward chuckled, his cool, soft touch moving up and down my spine in a comforting gesture. It had been a few weeks since Italy and we were both back in school, him falling into the curriculum with ease while I was struggling even though I hadn’t missed any classes.

‘He’s not so bad, love.’ His cheek rested against mine as I lifted my head, and I had to take a moment to get used to the sweet, comforting scent that was encircled around me.

I sighed, feeling my body meld to his as he wrapped his arm around my waist, I turned my head and rested it against his shoulder, wondering how long I could get away with avoiding the literature in front of me. I much preferred being in Edward’s arms to trying to decipher the old English in front of me. The vampire chuckled at my actions, and my thoughts too knowing him, and held me tighter. I felt him kiss my hair and take a deep inhale. The contented sound, too low for others to hear, made my heart skip a beat—I could’ve sworn I felt him smile against my scalp when he heard it.

All too soon Edward leaned me away from him and I straightened with a reluctant sigh, knowing he wouldn’t be releasing me unless it was necessary. And sure enough, the teacher was returning to the classroom, photocopies for his next lecture in hand. The kiss Edward placed on my forehead lessened my frustration a little, and when he pulled away we shared a genuine, happy smile before we returned to the essay question we’d been given.

‘Seriously is this even English?’ I rubbed at my temples, knowing I was going to have one hell of a headache before this class was even over.

‘Just focus on the key words in the question, and put together what they want you to say from that.’ At my confused look he elaborated, managing to explain it in a way I understood. I could have kissed him, but I didn’t, instead I looked back down to my paper, hoping he didn’t notice the blush on my cheeks.

We hadn’t actually kissed yet, not properly anyway. I didn’t know why, because in every other way each movement was natural in a way that felt like we’d been together for years rather than weeks. It might have been my fault—I’d never been in a relationship before, and I’d certainly never kissed anyone. So I might have been subconsciously avoiding it out of fear of doing it wrong, of being awful at it. But that was crazy, right? I mean, everyone had to have their first kiss sometime and as long as it was with the right person, someone who cared about you as much as you did them, then a little potential awkwardness was nothing to be afraid of. Logically, I knew that, but I was a coward and inexperienced, so I didn’t want to be the one to make the first move—especially not at school. People were still staring, partly because the Cullen’s were back—well Alice and Edward were, the rest had “graduated” almost a year ago—and partly because I was the Swan Edward was holding hands with in the halls now. I hadn’t actually heard anyone talking about it, nor had I had anyone directly ask me anything, but I knew they were talking about it. I didn’t want to know what they were saying, because I couldn’t imagine any of them were nice things, but I felt more like an animal in a zoo than I did human these days. So first kiss at school was completely out of the question, even if being around Edward was like being in our own specially designed indestructible bubble. I didn’t want them to have any more ammunition than they already had.

The bell rang as I was finishing up my last sentence and Edward waited patiently for me to pack up before taking my backpack and my hand. On our way to the cafeteria my sister passed us, heading in the direction of the exit, I frowned and was about to call out to her when my vampire whispered an explanation in my ear.

‘Jacob’s come to meet her for lunch, don’t worry she’s not ditching.’ He placed a kiss behind my ear before pulling back and any trace of concern I’d had was replaced by a pleasant tingle where his lips had touched my skin.

‘I still don’t understand what happened there, you know.’ I murmured too low for other eavesdropping students to hear, but Edward wasn’t any other student.

‘Bella knew that our relationship wasn’t genuine, she went along with it because she hated the other male attention she was getting from students she wasn’t interested in. She noticed the other human’s reluctance to be near us and figured I’d be good at keeping any unwanted admirers at bay.’ He whispered into my ear, placing random food items on the tray I was carrying for the “both” of us.

‘Okay… it just seems a little extreme, especially after what happened last spring.’ He knew what I was referring to, and his eyes tightened slightly as he remembered James, Laurent and Victoria. His response was low as we took our seats at our usual table, Alice was already there, her eyes lighting up at our approach.

‘That was an unforeseen circumstance, those vampires weren’t supposed to pass through our territory and changed their mind at the last second.’ He said, his words coated with guilt even though nothing had actually happened, ‘we dealt with them, anyway, there and then. I’m just relieved you weren’t there. If James, the tracker had smelt your blood and seen my protectiveness over you… it could have turned into a game for him.’

I nodded, smiling as he slid my seat closer to him so the left side of my body was in line with his right. His arm settled over my shoulders and I reached forward to grab a banana from the tray of food that settled on the table in between us.

‘Can I ask you something? And will you be completely honest with me, even if you think it’ll hurt my feelings?’ I asked, my voice quiet as I looked in between both Alice and Edward.

It was about Bella. My sister’s dismissal and lack of interest in my life had been playing on my mind a lot lately. Had she always had this attitude towards me, and I’d just been too lost in being the protective older sister that I hadn’t noticed? Edward of course heard the question before I voiced it out loud and the sadness that swirled in his honey colored eyes told me the answer before his musical voice could deliver it. He kissed my forehead and caressed my cheek, before Alice’s soft; wind chime bell voice broke the moment.

‘Bella has never shown any kind of interest in your well-being, Y/N, in the moments I’ve seen between the two of you now and in the future.’ I could hear the sadness in her voice as well and I bit my lip in an attempt to keep the tears at bay.

How could it be? Had I done something wrong? Something she couldn’t forgive me for? I racked my brains, but I couldn’t think of anything, except Edward, but I knew they’d never loved each other that way, and she was definitely in love with the werewolf so what was it?

‘It was nothing you did, love.’ He kissed my hair again, his soft voice murmuring into the dark strands, ‘you’re not responsible for her decisions or her feelings, do you understand? It’s her loss and you have plenty of others who love you like a sister, some a daughter and one who loves you with every fiber of his existence.’

A wave of pure happiness washed over me as I looked in between the two Cullen’s. They were right, what was one person’s lack of love in the face of a whole family who cared for me as their own? I decided then and there that Bella’s decision to treat me as a stranger rather than a sister would never bother me again, because I had all the family I could ever need, and the love of a man who was more perfect than I deserved. I was the luckiest human in the world.

The rest of the day flew by and I was so relieved—we only had a few more weeks left until graduation and I could have a break from the headaches the exams were bringing me. As Edward and I drove to his house—my request as I knew Charlie would be at work and Bella would probably be at the reservation—I wondered if I’d have another chance to graduate school. As a vampire. I wondered if I’d have the chance to graduate enough times to the point where I’d be able to face the curriculum, exams, with the same casual confidence that Edward and the rest of the Cullen’s could.

It wasn’t as if I’d never considered it before, and despite Edward’s assurance that the Volturi wouldn’t come to check my mortality any time soon; I found myself picturing it more than I ever had. It used to be that I would dream of it, dream of being with Edward forever, to have him look at me like he loved me, and I would wake up and reality would shine down on me as the sun rose behind the clouds. At that point I’d force the secret desire down, ashamed to feel such a way about my sister’s boyfriend. But now I knew my feelings were returned, it was hard not to think about my future with the vampire, and no matter how many times I thought about it, my desire to join him as an immortal didn’t change.

I knew he didn’t want that, because of my soul, but I also knew that this didn’t just involve him anymore, it involved all of the Cullen’s. All of the ones I’d considered as family when I’d first met them over a year ago. They all—except for Rosalie—had accepted me a lot faster than my sister. At the time I hadn’t understood why, but I’d come to learn it was because Alice’s visions assured that I was going to be a member of the family soon, while Bella was not. And now I worried about when the Volturi would come, would Edward’s inherent desire to keep me human result in the destruction of the family I’d barely had the time to get to know?

We arrived at the white mansion in the woods and Edward was opening my door for me before I had even unclipped my seatbelt. I offered him a thankful smile as I climbed from the car and took his hand. He returned it, but I didn’t reach his eyes—I knew that meant he’d been listening to my thoughts and he wasn’t fond of what he had heard. I kissed his cheek, and tugged him lightly; he released a breath and led me into the house. It was quiet when we entered and he revealed that Emmett, Jasper, Alice and Rosalie were on a hunting trip in Mount Rainer, while Esme and Carlisle had gone away to visit friends in Alaska for the weekend.

‘Do you need to hunt?’ I asked, my fingers tracing the barely noticeable circles that were starting to form underneath his eyes—his orbs were still golden, but were darker like honeycomb rather than the butterscotch shade that meant his thirst was satiated. It wasn’t something you’d notice unless you knew what you were looking for.

‘I’m fine, they’ve only gone for a chance to hunt something other than deer and elk.’ He smirked, kissing the palm of the hand that still lingered on his perfect face, ‘if I get thirsty I’ll be out and back within an hour.’

I smiled, my eyes falling to his lips and my earlier thoughts popped back into my head. My heart picked up and my breath got caught in my throat, before I could shake my head to clear it of my errant thoughts, Edward’s cool hands placed mine on his shoulders. I gripped him there and shivered in pleasure when his touch glided down the exposed skin of my arms, to my waist, where he pulled me closer. I didn’t know what was happening, but I didn’t have the concentration power to ponder it, as the warmth his touch left behind was distracting me. My eyes fluttered shut when his forehead fell against my own. I could feel the coolness of his body, the sweetness of his breath, and his scent surrounded me to the point of my mind being overwhelmed with him.

When his lips met mine, soft, icy and tentative I swear I was incapable of coherent thought. All I could think about was how wonderful and right his mouth felt moving against mine. As the kiss progressed, his tentativeness melted away and turned into something more sure, more passionate and fiery. A sound echoed in the high ceilinged room, but I was too lost to wonder if that sound came from me. My hands moved of their own accord and slid into his soft bronze hair, attempting to pull him closer than he already was. I was aware of my lungs burning in my chest, but having Edward so close was beyond intoxicating, and so I was incapable of pondering what that meant. My vampire’s hands moved to mine in his hair and gently but firmly broke my hold. After another moment, his lips stopped in their movement and he pulled an inch away from me, allowing the opportunity to breathe. It was then that I realized how much I needed oxygen as my lungs pulled the air in as quickly as possible. My forehead fell to his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around my waist as he too caught his breath. He recovered before I did and lifted me up to sit on the couch in the living room with me on his lap. It felt like it took longer than it did, but eventually my breathing returned to normal and I leaned back, staring into his eyes as an unstoppable thought echoed through my mind.

That was my first kiss ever and my first last kiss.

‘That was…wow.’ I blushed at my incapability to adequately put the kiss into words, but I wasn’t going to try when I knew it was fruitless.

‘I couldn’t agree with you more, love.’ His smile was dazzling and I felt myself beam in response to his happiness.

I slid to his side so that we could watch the TV together, ignoring the desire to press my lips to his; I needed to be good. I knew how difficult it was for him to touch me in the simplest of ways, and I know if I’d been the vampire in that interaction, I would have had great difficulty concentrating on not hurting him while my thoughts were overwhelmed with desire. That was why I rarely initiated any touches between us; I didn’t want to take him by surprise, I wanted him to be in complete control when he touched me, because it was him who had the most difficulty. I smiled when his lips kissed my hair, and snuggled closer into his side, sighing contentedly when he held me a little tighter. At around dinnertime I called Charlie and asked permission to sleep over at Alice’s. I lied and told him the rest of the family was camping this weekend and I wanted to keep her company. He bought it and I hung up as Edward rejoined me in the living room. My brows rose in pleasant surprise when I saw that he was carrying a bowl of cheesy pasta and a glass of water.

‘You cooked?’ I grinned at the bashful, proud expression on his face, ‘how?’

‘Learned from the cooking channel.’ He winked and I ignored the fact my heart skipped a beat as I accepted the meal from him. He settled next to me again, his arm around my shoulders as I ate.

‘There’s something I want to run by you.’ I admitted, placing my now empty bowl onto the coffee table next to my half empty glass of water, ‘I want to put up a vote. For me becoming a vampire.’

I felt him stiffen and after stealing myself, I looked up at his expression. It was frozen in surprise, but I could see the horror and rage burning in his honeycomb eyes.

‘I know how you feel on the subject, and I know what your answer will be, but this is more than just me and you now, Edward. It involves everyone, and I will not put everyone in danger because of me.’ My voice was firm and sure; it was something I’d been thinking about for weeks now; whenever Edward wasn’t around to distract my thoughts. I knew what I wanted, I’d never been more sure of anything, and I wanted to start living that life. Not because I felt the pressure of the Volturi potentially popping by for a visit, but because I wanted an eternity with him. Call it irrational, call it too fast, but I didn’t care.

He was silent for a long moment, his eyes observing my expression and listening to the thoughts in my mind. Eventually the hardness around his eyes thawed and he nodded once, clearly not happy, but he respected my decision. I smiled, more than grateful for his attitude and kissed the palm of the hand that was resting over my shoulders. I knew he’d argue the opposing side, and I was fine with that, because I knew either way, vampire or not, he would be by my side loving me as I love him. And that’s all that mattered.

Epilogue: ten years later.

After the Cullen’s had voted in favour of me becoming immortal 5-2, I’d been turned at the end of July. Between graduation and then, quite a few things had happened. Edward had presented me with a proposition. He’d asked me to marry him in exchange for him turning me into a vampire instead of Carlisle. What had surprised him was my willingness to do that—despite my Mom and Dad’s failed marriage, I’d always dreamed of finding my own husband one day. Of finding the perfect man for me to spend the rest of my life with, and after joking with Edward that I’d expected a proper proposal rather than a business deal from an old-fashioned gentleman, he’d grinned and promised to make it up to me.

Not two days later he took me to a meadow he’d discovered in the forest. The moon was high enough in the sky to brighten the field for us, and it created a perfectly romantic ambiance. We’d had a picnic in the moonlight, a few battery operated candles also placed in the grass to allow my less sensitive eyes better sight. When I’d finished the delicious sandwiches that he’d once again prepared, he pulled me to my feet before he himself dropped to one knee. I’ll never forget the way he looked at me that night—his eyes had been softer than honey and shone with so much love and adoration that my knees felt weak. He promised to love me forever and asked me to marry him. I’d of course said yes, jumping into his arms and kissing him passionately. He’d chuckled and placed a finger to my lips as I’d been about to apologise for hurdling myself at him when I knew how careful he tried to be. All thoughts of apologies melted from my mind as I watched him slide the ring onto my finger—it was a white gold emerald cut ring, the centre stone was topaz in colour and there were white diamonds on either side. The yellow stone reminded me of his eyes and he’d sheepishly chuckled and admitted that was why he’d chosen it, because he wanted me to have a reminder of him with me always.

We’d officially tied the knot in July at the Cullen property. It had been a very small, intimate wedding, despite Alice’s desire to expand the guest list. There weren’t more than fifty people in attendance, and it couldn’t have been more perfect. Alice of course organized everything—I hadn’t trusted anyone else to pull together a wedding in such a short space of time, and I certainly had no idea where to start. Other than asking Alice to be my maid of honour and Rosalie to be a bridesmaid, seeing as she was more of a sister than Bella was, even if she didn’t like me very much, I’d given up the reins completely to the psychic vampire. Charlie and Renée had been in attendance, but Bella hadn’t been invited. Edward and Alice had asked me numerous times if I was sure of that decision, but I knew I was. She wasn’t my family and she hadn’t been for a long time, she had made that decision and I was simply respecting her wishes. And as I’d realized all those weeks ago— your family didn’t have to be the ones you were biologically related to.

My dress had been magnificent; it was form fitting and yet not so tight that I couldn’t walk properly. It was overlaid with lace and held a mixture of vintage and modern; a perfect representation of Edward and I. Alice and Rosalie both wore baby pink floor length dresses, the silk material being simple and yet elegant. Jasper and Emmett had led their respective partners down the isle, with the curly haired vampire being Edward’s best man. Charlie walked me down the isle and Carlisle officiated the wedding—I’d suggested to my vampire that having someone we both loved officiate the ceremony would make it that much more meaningful, and he’d agreed. There had been no question over whom we would ask, and the emotion that had overcome the eldest Cullen’s face when we’d asked would be something I’d never forget.

After Edward and I had officially been joined in holy matrimony, we’d left the very same night to enjoy our honeymoon. Edward had insisted on surprising me with the location and I’d been happy to let him have the responsibility—all of the ideas I had were places that were known for rain. I figured that would be best with my husband being a vampire; I didn’t want him to spend the three weeks confined to the indoors, only to come out at night. However, I didn’t need to worry about that as he had taken me to Isle Esme, a gift from Carlisle just off the coast of Brazil. The privacy meant we could be out in the sunlight as often as we wanted and I was grateful for that as we spent most of our days hiking, swimming in the ocean or lying on the beach.

Despite the traditions of a “honeymoon” we didn’t take that step during our three-week blissful vacation. I knew how difficult it would be for him and I told him I had none of those expectations because of that reason. I didn’t want him to wonder if my lack of interest had anything other underlying reasons behind it. Because it wasn’t that I was uninterested— in fact, I was very much looking forward to being able to be with him in that way, but I didn’t want to push it. Though I trusted him completely, I knew he’d never forgive himself if he slipped even for a second and accidentally hurt me. But I didn’t need sex to feel close to him. For the entire vacation we were attached at the hip, whether it was holding hands, or me sitting in his lap with his arms wrapped around me, we were never not touching. It was wonderful.

Unfortunately, it couldn’t last forever and when we returned back to Forks Edward and I took some time to visit Charlie before we went to Alaska for “collage”. It was nice to see him again and remind him I would always love him as I said goodbye at the doorstep of the home I’d grown up in. Bella hadn’t been there and when I’d asked Charlie told me she was on a trip with Jacob, but that suited me just fine; her absence meant our farewell wasn’t tainted by disdainful glances.

Upon arriving in Alaska, I realized the house we moved into was of the same interior style to the one in Washington and it was hard not to find the familiar decoration comforting. The whole family was reunited upon the move as a new state meant the opportunity to start over, though it was believed I wouldn’t be able to leave the house for a few years as I mastered my thirst and ability to resist human blood. Edward had changed me on the last day of July—the last thing I saw, before the pain became so unbearable that focusing on something else was impossible, was the honeycomb eyes of my husband, full of love, adoration and remorse. The pain burned consistently for what felt like longer than the three days I was promised, but I knew Edward never left my side as screams passed through my lips despite my attempts to hold them in.

He held my hand through it all, and when I woke up to face my new life, his face was the first thing I saw. I remember being completely amazed by his magnificent beauty as I looked at him through my new eyes—it had been like seeing him for the first time. The hand that wasn’t being held in his reached up and traced over his cheek gently, mindful of the extra strength I’d been warned about, and a gasp had left my lips at the feel of his skin against mine. It felt smoother somehow, and warmer. He’d smiled and reminded me that we were the same temperature now and I returned the gesture, reaching up and pulling his mouth down to mine. We kissed passionately for a moment and when we parted I told him I loved him. He had beamed with happiness and hugged me to his chest, inhaling my scent and relaxing for what I was sure had been the first time in three days.

Carlisle, Esme and Jasper had joined us then. The former couple welcoming me to the family while the latter eyed me warily. I’d frowned in confusion, and a little offense, until I’d realized what had caused his behaviour—I was the newborn, he was expecting me to be bloodthirsty and irrational. As that thought crossed my mind I became aware of the burning in my throat—I felt like I hadn’t had a drink in weeks and I knew what I needed. Edward smiled comfortingly and I relaxed at once as he announced that we were going hunting. That had been incredible. Running through the forests in my new home had been thrilling, my enhanced senses making it more beautiful than I’d thought possible. Hunting didn’t take as long as I’d thought, and after drinking a few bears and a moose, I felt full and the burning in my throat was none existent. As we’d returned to the house, racing with Edward, I was overjoyed at how happy and content I felt—this was the life I was destined to live. I was certain of it.

I blinked out of my trip down memory lane as someone gently but firmly kicked my leg under the table. I looked up to see Jasper cocking his brow at me in question—he’d probably felt the thirst I’d been remembering as I woke up as a newborn. I shook my head in answer to his silent inquiry and went back to picking apart the cookie on my plate that I of course had no desire to eat. Edward and Emmett hadn’t joined us at the table yet—their class had been on the other side of campus and they had to move at a human pace to get here, so the four of us usually beat them. My lips pursed as my gaze flickered out of the window and when I saw the snow that was falling in thick flakes to the ground, my lips twitched as I fought a smile.

‘Your doing?’ Alice asked, her lips not even moving as she followed my gaze.

‘Maybe.’ I grinned.

That was something I’d discovered in my first few years—I could influence the elements, including being able to change the weather whenever I wanted. I didn’t do it often, as Carlisle had pointed out that constant and unpredictable changes in weather were bound to draw attention and obviously, that wasn’t okay. So I only ever gave into the desire once every few months, otherwise I restricted my influence behind closed doors where no one else was aware. It was fun, but beyond anything else it relaxed me and provided a healthy outlet for any emotions I couldn’t express otherwise. Of course Jasper would have helped if I asked, but I wanted to feel my grief, not have it taken away.

‘The first snowfall of the year. It’s pretty, too bad it’s going to be washed away by rain tomorrow,’ Alice commented, her eyes lingering on the scenery outside before she looked over to me, worry shining in her black eyes. We were all thirsty today, which was why Jasper in particular was on edge. Thirst was actually something I handled quite will and within I few months of being newborn, I’d enrolled in high school as a freshman as soon as my eyes darkened to gold.

‘I’m okay, Alice.’ I murmured, knowing if any humans were looking in our direction they wouldn’t even be able to see my lips moving.

‘No you’re not. You don’t have to lie to us, Y/N.’ Jasper replied, his foot finding mine underneath the table again and giving me a playful nudge.

‘I know, I’m sorry,’ I bit my lip, grateful crying wasn’t possible, ‘I just didn’t think it would happen this soon.’

‘I’m sorry, Y/N.’ Rosalie said, placing a hand over one of mine. I smiled gratefully, happy that the blonde had warmed up to me over the years. It would have sucked spending an eternity with her hating me.

‘Thank you, Rose.’ My head rested on her shoulder for a moment as I hugged her from the side. I sat up afterwards, being sure to move at a human pace—it was simply too easy to move at vampire speed.

‘How do you feel about shopping tomorrow after school?’ Alice asked and I bit back a groan.

‘I have homework.’ I said, it was a poor excuse and she knew it—I had plenty of time to finish any homework I might be assigned, so realistically I was free as a bird.

‘Nice try. You need new clothes, the trends are changing and you’ll start sticking out soon.’ She grinned in victory when my shoulders slumped in defeat.

‘Fine.’ I threw a cookie crumb at her, laughing when she caught it without an issue.

I didn’t notice the small smiles that formed on the faces of my family at the sound—I’d been down ever since I’d found out that Charlie had passed away. It had been a total shock, healthy one day and the next he’d had a fatal heart attack. Edward had held me for four hours straight when I found out, not once did he complain, he gave me all the time I needed as my body shook with sobs. It had been a few months since I’d got the news now and I was starting to come out from underneath the dark cloud of grief, much to the relief of my family. They hated seeing me so forlorn.

My head snapped up almost too quickly as I caught Edward’s scent as he entered the Cafeteria, our brother trailing behind him and laughing his booming laugh at something the bronze haired vampire had said. Seeing them joking around together made me smile and when Edward winked in my direction my head ducked bashfully. I heard Emmett making a joke at my expense, amused I could still be modest after ten years, and I bit back a grin when I heard the curly haired brother masking a sound of pain, indicating my vampire had taken a jab at him. I felt myself relax down to my bones when Edward slid into the empty seat to my left, his right arm automatically wrapping around my shoulders.

‘How was class?’ I asked, entwining my fingers with his where they rested on my shoulder. His free hand was idly pushing food around on his tray as Emmett answered on his behalf.

‘Actually interesting. The new girl was snuggling up awful close to your husband there, sister.’ He winked, his grin growing at my frown of annoyance.

‘What new girl?’ I was surprised I’d missed the news, it was rare for new students to enroll here—not many people willingly wanted to go to school where it was freezing more often than it was warm.

‘Jody Hendricks.’ Edward murmured, the corners of his mouth falling in distaste, ‘I didn’t speak a word to her but she wouldn’t shut up for the whole class.’

‘I see,’ my eyes darted around the room as my irritation grew—I wasn’t usually the jealous type, but I blamed my short fuse on my grief.

It wasn’t hard to find her for two reasons: first, almost everyone was staring at her. Second she was staring at my husband. A growl formed at the back of my throat, too low for any humans to hear, but definitely loud enough for my family to pick up on. Emmett and Jasper snorted in amusement, but I didn’t pay them any mind as Edward’s hand came up to caress the side of my cheek, effortlessly earning my attention. His gentle touch erased the death stare that had been present on my expression meer moments before, and melt into something much softer. When I saw the amusement in his dark eyes I felt embarrassment wash through me like a tidal wave: what had I been doing? Of course I knew I had nothing to be worried about, but emotions were irrational and I’d been overcome with the jealous feeling before I’d been able to consider the ludicrousness behind it.

My thoughts were silenced as Edward’s lips moved against mine suddenly. The kids was deliberate, allowing anticipation to build between us like a slow building fire, and just when I was starting to forget where we were he pulled away, placing a kiss to my forehead. My smile was genuine and soft as I looked up into his eyes, that mirrored the same gentleness. The onyx orbs shimmered with adoration as he stared back, meeting my gaze head on. Immortality had been everything I’d hoped it would be and more, which I hadn’t thought would be possible, but it was. My love for Edward had only grown and flourished, as had the love I held for the rest of my family. Without a doubt I had been born to be a vampire, this is where I belonged, surrounded by my adopted family and in my husband’s arms. Here, I was home. And I couldn’t imagine that would ever change, even if I lived for an eternity.

#edward cullen x reader #edward cullen #twilight imagine #olympic coven #new moon #Jasper Hale x platonic reader #Alice Cullen x platonic reader #Carlisle Cullen x platonic reader #Esme Cullen x platonic reader #Emmett Cullen x platonic reader #Rosalie Hale x platonic Reader

255 notes · View notes

works-of-fanfiction · 5 years ago

Text

Keep Me Company [Steve Rogers x Reader]

Summary: The reader is convinced to go on a double blind date by her co-worker. Throughout the evening, it becomes clear that someone other than her date, has peaked her interest.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: Some swearing.

Word count: 4.7k

A/N: I haven’t written in over a year so this isn’t the best! This idea kinda sucks and turned out to be a lot longer than I wanted it to be, but I hope someone likes it regardless 🖤

———————-

[Reader’s POV]

“I’ve told you before, I’m really not interested in dating anyone right now,” I reiterated, shaking my head at my coworker, Ivy. She’d somehow managed to get herself roped into a blind date, and she’d spent the past week desperately asking every female at work to go with her.

“Please, Y/N! My cousin organised this and my date is bringing a friend. I can’t show up alone, it’ll be so awkward,” She’d now invited herself to sit at my desk, and I sighed out of annoyance as I closed my laptop and looked over at her, “Please? You’ll be my lifesaver.” She batted her eyelashes at me like a child begging their parents for an expensive toy. I mulled over it for a moment, and not a single scenario in my mind resulted in a good outcome. Has anything good ever come out of a blind date? To me they just seem super uncomfortable for everyone involved, with at least one party praying for the clock to move faster and for the ordeal to end. I didn’t really want to go, but the image of Ivy arriving alone to be faced by two strangers gave me a major wave of secondhand embarrassment. I knew I wouldn’t want to go through that, so I couldn’t let her walk into that either.

“Alright, alright. I’ll go with you, but you owe me one! Big time,” I gave in. She rose from the chair and grinned at me, heading towards the door.

“I’ll go and forward the reservation details to you. My date is called Steve, and you’ll be meeting his friend, Sam. Oh, I’m so excited!” She clasped her hands together and did a little dance on her tiptoes before disappearing out of my office. I groaned, catching my head in my hands. What have I gotten myself into?

—————-

As instructed by an extremely antsy Ivy, I arrived at the restaurant at 7.30pm on the dot. She was waiting outside for me when my taxi pulled up, and I could instantly see how nervous she was as she leaned against the restaurant window, bouncing her knee. “Y/N! You’re here! I thought you might bail on me,” she said, her voice shaking slightly. Ivy was always filled with so much energy, but with the added nerves she was even more jumpy than usual and couldn’t keep still for a second.

“So, do you have any idea what these guys look like?” I asked, hugging myself to try my best to stay warm. I didn’t understand why we couldn’t just wait inside, but Ivy insisted we greet them properly as soon as they arrived.

“I have an idea of what Steve looks like, but my cousin really wouldn’t let me see his picture for longer than five seconds,” she replied, her teeth chattering a little from the cold breeze hitting us both. A black car soon pulled up outside and Ivy straightened, brushing herself down, “This must be them. How do I look?”

“You look great. Just relax,” I offered her a small smile as we watched the car doors open. I looked away for a moment and rolled my eyes at the whole ordeal. There was Ivy, standing there like an excited schoolgirl and playing with her hair like her hands were glued to her head. Then there was me, lazily dressed at best and already feeling the urge to check the time. Again, why did I agree to this?

“You must be Ivy, and Y/N,” a voice said. I snapped back and turned to face them properly. I could literally hear the breath getting caught in Ivy’s throat as a quiet squeak came out of her mouth. But I couldn’t blame her, as I blinked heavily to try and make sense of the two men standing before us. I knew the names Steve and Sam sounded familiar, but I didn’t realise we were literally going for dinner with two of the Avengers. Immediately, my ‘couldn’t care less’ attitude towards the evening shifted, and the pressure was on. I’d agreed to a blind date, a blind double date, and I was paired with Sam Wilson, Falcon himself. No matter how the evening went, I knew I had to at least make a good impression. I couldn’t embarrass myself in front of an Avenger.

“I’m Y/N,” I stated, mostly aiming my smile at Sam, but feeling the stare of both men on me. I waited for Ivy to introduce herself after me, but she stayed silent. I gave her a little nudge and she still didn’t say anything, so I put my arm around her shoulder for encouragement, “and this is Ivy, who I think needs a drink! Should we go inside, Ives?” I patted her back in a final attempt to get her to speak.

She cleared her throat, eventually opening her mouth to answer, “of course,” she turned to Steve and held out her hand to shake his, “sorry I uh - dry mouth,” she lied as he shook her hand awkwardly. I didn’t know whether to cringe or burst into laughter, so instead I just led everybody into the restaurant and got us seated at our table.

I didn’t know what to expect of the night ahead. Ivy was already a nervous wreck and she’d barely introduced herself to our company for the evening. I kind of felt sorry for her. I mean, her cousin could’ve pre-warned her that her date was someone as high-profile as Captain America! I think any girl would faint at the sight of him sitting across from them at a restaurant. Even I couldn’t take my eyes off of him and he wasn’t even my date to gawk at.

We quickly ordered drinks and read our food menus in silence. I could feel Ivy’s foot dancing under the table, so I reached over and placed my hand on her knee to calm her down. She looked at me and mouthed an apology. I couldn’t believe how nervous she was, she looked pale white like she was going to throw up any second. “How about we get a sharing appetiser to start? They sound really good,” Sam suggested, lifting his menu and pointing at one of the pictures. Thank God for him breaking the silence, because I felt like I could scream out of sheer awkwardness.

“Dough balls, chicken wings, tempura shrimp, mozzarella sticks... it doesn’t take much more convincing for me!” I enthused, reading the rest of the selection. I glanced up to see Steve looking at me, a wide smile on his face that reached his eyes. I felt my cheeks heat up, and I could’ve quite literally slapped myself for getting so excited over Captain America smiling at me. I didn’t want to turn into a giddy, fidgety teenager. We already had one of those at the table.

“What do you think, Ivy?” Steve asked her. She nodded in agreement, and everything in me wanted to grab her by the shoulders and shake her. Why was she being so weird?

“Um, would you mind ordering the appetiser for us? I’m just going to go wash my hands. Ivy, come with me,” I stood up and grabbed her arm, almost dragging her out of her chair and towards the bathroom. Once inside, she stood in the mirror, vigorously scrubbing her hands and glaring at her own reflection.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me, Y/N! I just can’t speak, the words won’t come out!” She panicked, pretty much splashing water everywhere. I leaned against the counter with my arms folded, trying to think of what I could say to her to improve this situation.

“I know this is not exactly ideal -“

“Ideal?! This is a nightmare! I thought my cousin was just going to set me up with some loser she knew from work. I didn’t know it would be Steve fucking Rogers! I’ve made myself look like such an idiot,” she frantically dried her hands with a paper towel, her pale face growing redder by the second. I grabbed her wrists and took the paper towel from her, tossing it in the bin beside me.

“Listen,” I started, keeping my grip on her wrists and making her look me in the eyes, “You’re not the only one who is nervous, and I too thought it was just going to be a couple of loser guys wanting some company. Neither of us expected bloody Captain America and Falcon to show up, but here we are. Just don’t take it so seriously. Try and have fun, be yourself!” I internally cringed at how cliché I sounded, but if I wanted this night to be painless, I had to snap Ivy out of her weird mood in any way I could.

“Y - You’re right. You’re right! Just be myself,” Ivy repeated, more to herself than to me. I quickly washed my hands and we went back out there, re-joining the guys at the table where the drinks had now arrived.

I sat down and couldn’t help but notice the extravagant drink that was placed in front of Steve. It was bright orange in colour, with grapefruit slices on the rim and a neon green umbrella wedged in the top of it. I couldn’t help but quietly giggle at the sight of this muscular mountain of a man, drinking something that looked like it belonged on a beach in Hawaii in the hand of a bikini-clad model. “Aren’t we going to address the elephant in the room?” I laughed, putting down my menu.

“Do you mean that literal elephant ornament over there, or the tropical vomit that Steve is drinking?” Sam joked, picking up the cocktail, “Have you ever seen a liquid that colour?��

“Hey!” Steve grabbed the glass, cautiously placing it back down, “it just tastes better, okay? I didn’t know it would come with its own accessories,” he gestured to the grapefruit decorating the glass.

“I wouldn’t complain Steve, it’s the best part,” I added. He picked one of the slices from the glass and held it in front of my face.

“For you, m’lady,” he mocked in a posh accent. I glanced at everybody at the table and Sam was flashing his cheeky grin, whilst Ivy’s expression was a little less readable. I couldn’t tell if she was still just riddled with nerves, or if my interaction with Steve was bothering her. Either way, I leaned forward and took a bite out of the grapefruit, holding my hands underneath my chin as the juice dribbled everywhere.

“Oh damn,” I mumbled, still chewing the fruit. I grabbed a napkin and attempted to clean my sticky hands. Steve was chuckling quietly, as he went to take a sip of his no-doubt delicious cocktail, “that was messier than I thought.”

“That was a weird mixture of amusing, erotic, and disgusting,” Sam laughed. It felt as if we were all just staring at Ivy, waiting for her to join in, but all she could offer was a shy smile before she buried her head back into her menu to choose a main course. Sam looked at me from across the table with an inquisitive expression, gesturing towards her with his eyes. I just shrugged, glancing back over at Steve who just so happened to look at me at the same time. As we made eye contact, a light fluttering feeling invaded my stomach, and I didn’t know whether to just allow myself to feel it or to feel bad for wishing I could swap seats with Ivy. Don’t get me wrong, Sam was a great guy, but something about Steve was turning my insides to mush, and I hadn’t even been in his company for more than twenty minutes.

Our appetiser soon arrived, and we each ordered our main courses before we dug in. I kept trying to give Ivy subtle nudges and hints so she’d join in more, but she was still pretty quiet. She was trying her best, but it was clear that Steve was close to giving up on making conversation with her. “So, Ivy, Y/N,” Steve started, wiping the sides of his mouth with a napkin, “what do you both do?” I slowly chewed on a piece of shrimp, with Ivy looking at me as if she was waiting for me to do the talking. I signalled to her that my mouth was full, hopefully giving her a little push to answer the question.

“Y/N is one of the HR executives, and I uh - I work on the same floor in IT,” Ivy shakily explained, her voice quiet but it was better than stone cold silence.

“IT, huh? Well you could teach me how to get along better with technology,” Steve said to Ivy. She just looked down at her plate and mumbled something I couldn’t even hear. Sam shot me another one of his confused looks, and I really wished I knew what to say to get Ivy to speak up a bit more, or at least attempt to create a nice atmosphere for the rest of us.

Regardless of the slightly awkward atmosphere, we continued to eat and make conversation where we could. Steve and Sam asked a lot of questions, which I was too scared to return at first. What do you ask an Avenger? I don’t want to sound like an interviewer asking them everything about their lives and how they’ve quite literally saved the world multiple times. Throughout the conversation I learned that I have a lot more in common with Steve than I would’ve anticipated. I don’t know what that says about my character, given that Steve has lived more of his life in the early half of the 20th Century. Sam poked fun at me for some of my interests, calling me an old woman, but I soon silenced him when I threw a mozzarella stick at him which covered his cheek in breadcrumbs.

I tried to concentrate on Sam, in hopes that it would somehow force Ivy to actually pay attention to her date and make more effort. However, I couldn’t stop my eyes from wandering back over to Steve, where he sat with a warm smile on his face as he tried his best to get Ivy to communicate. He’d been asking us both questions all evening, but he was really only getting answers from me. I was really enjoying their company, and Sam made me laugh until my stomach hurt, but something inside of me wished I was sitting across from Steve. He was being the perfect gentleman, and his occasional compliments made my cheeks feel like they were on fire from all the blushing I must’ve been doing. At one point, Sam even told us to ‘get a room’ and if I wasn’t so busy trying to silently calm myself down, I probably would’ve had a sarcastic reply ready.

—————

We split the bill equally, and the guys quickly went to the bathroom before we left, so Ivy and I waited outside. “Steve’s really nice,” I stated, trying to fill the silence between us. I could understand her shyness in front of Sam and Steve, but she didn’t need to be so strange around me.

“He seems to really like you,” she muttered, folding her arms and sighing. I couldn’t tell how she was feeling, but she was really starting to bug me.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, trying my best not to sound irritated. She’d hardly said more than ten words all night, and I was running out of ways to cover for her and make conversation on her behalf. She looked at me with a frown, keeping her arms tightly folded across her chest, “what? You can’t be mad at me for talking to Steve, you didn’t exactly make this night easy for him.”

“You knew I was nervous! You couldn’t just sit and talk to Sam, you had to get all chatty with Steve and make me look stupid.”

“I made you look stupid?! Don’t you realise I spent most of the evening starting conversations for you? I had to bring up topics I knew you liked to get you to speak, and even that didn’t work. You can’t blame me here.”

I leaned against a nearby lamppost, resisting the urge to roll my eyes at the stupidity I was being forced to listen to. Ivy continued to rant at me about how I’d ruined her evening by getting along so well with Steve, and how I probably planned to ‘steal her date’ all along. “I did you a favour by agreeing to come to this. It’s not my fault that you sat there in silence most of the time. We all tried our best, you know we did,” I retorted. She stood there glaring at me, probably searching for something else she could say to try and justify her nonsense.

Suddenly, the restaurant doors swung open and out stepped Sam and Steve. “Do you ladies wanna go grab dessert somewhere?” Steve asked, his tone a little hesitant. I couldn’t blame him, I’d be hesitant too after spending almost two hours sitting opposite the human equivalent of a brick wall. I glanced at Ivy who was still stood with her arms folded, scowling like an upset toddler.

“I’m not feeling so good. I’m just going to head home. It was nice to meet you both,” Ivy said to them, without even bothering to make eye contact, “see you at work Y/N,” she murmured, before walking off down the street and disappearing around the corner.

“Do you think I should’ve gone with her?” Steve asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Usually I would say yes, but in this case, I don’t think you’re inclined to do anything,” Sam said honestly, placing a hand on Steve’s shoulder. He pulled the car keys out of his pocket and unlocked the car, walking around to the driver’s side, “enjoy your dessert!” He called over, winking.

“Wait, where are you going?” I asked, a sudden wave of nerves hitting me as I realised what he was implying.

“It doesn’t take a fool to know where he’s not wanted,” he replied, pushing out his bottom lip jokingly.

“Sam! Don’t say that,” I walked around to the driver’s side and he placed a hand on my arm, smiling down at me.

“Now I’ve never seen Steve have a crush, but I’d say you’re pretty close,” he said quietly, probably so Steve couldn’t hear. I glanced over at the Super Soldier pacing the pavement and whistling to himself, and the all-too-familiar fluttery feeling returned to my stomach, “but don’t let him have too much dessert, he’s a superhero remember.”

“Sam, you don’t have to leave.”

“I had a great time tonight, despite the uh - well despite Ivy,” we both laughed and I couldn’t suppress the huge grin that spread across my face, “I’m sure I’ll see you around at the Avengers HQ sometime.”

“Now you’re planning way too far ahead,” I slapped his arm playfully, before thanking him for making the date bearable at least.

“See you later old man!” He shouted over to Steve as I walked back around to join him. Steve just snickered and shook his head, waving off his friend as Sam got into the car and drove away. I stood beside him, my heart pounding as I tried to figure out how I ended up here. As bad as I feel to admit it, I guess I only have Ivy and her weird behaviour to thank for this.

“So, where are you taking me Captain?” I asked, standing opposite him and looking up into his eyes. My knees felt shaky and weak beneath me, and I mentally scolded myself for behaving like such a cheesy rom-com character. Steve maintained eye contact as he brought his right hand up to my face. I shivered a little as his cold fingers brushed my temple, as he moved a piece of hair out of my eyes.

“I was going to suggest ice cream, but perhaps it’s a little too cold for that,” he stepped back and shrugged his jacket off of his shoulders, “here.” He wrapped the jacket around me and I slid my arms into the sleeves. Steve laughed at how oversized it was on me, as he tried to fold the sleeves a little. I caught my reflection in the restaurant window and I smiled to myself. Strangely, the image of myself standing opposite Captain America whilst wearing his jacket, was something that made my heart do somersaults. The gesture was so simple, yet so thoughtful.

“I have an idea, but we’ll have to make a stop along the way,” he smiled, holding out his hand. I placed my hand in his and agreed to let him lead the way. After all, I was way too caught up in the moment to protest and I was excited to see what he’d come up with so last minute.

We walked a few blocks and stopped at a bakery. It was five minutes before closing time, but Steve insisted it was the best place to grab something for dessert. I waited by the door as he spoke to the cashier. They handed him quite a large paper bag, then we were soon back on our way to wherever he was leading us to. We walked for a little while longer before stopping in front of the museum. “I know it seems strange that I’ve brought you here, to a museum literally dedicated to me, but I’ve got a deal with the security guards here and it’s kind of relaxing to be here after closing,” he explained, before lightly knocking on the glass door. A security guard eventually let us in, and I kept ahold of Steve’s hand as we walked through the exhibits.

I read everything on the walls and stopped to look at every single picture. Steve was never far behind, either holding my hand or resting it on my back as I engrossed myself in all the information the museum had to offer. I’d never had the chance to visit before, and I was learning more and more about Steve as the minutes passed. “Do you remember all of this?” I asked, my eyes still fixed on a photo of him surrounded by other soldiers. They all looked happy to be together, to be a team.

“Every single second,” I turned to look at him and he gazed into the glass case, his eyes scanning each picture. A smile crept onto his face and he looked down at me, his smile widening as our eyes met.

“You miss it, don’t you?”

“Things are definitely different now,” he took my hand and we continued to walk on, stopping in front of a group of mannequins wearing uniforms, “it’s a time I’ll always cherish. But that doesn’t mean I’m not happy to be here now. There’s so many people I’ve met that I am so grateful to know,” he reached forward and ran his fingers along the fabric of his old uniform, that same reminiscent smile appearing on his face, “including those I’ve met on slightly disastrous double dates.” He turned and winked at me and I just rolled my eyes at his corny remark, whilst failing to ignore the butterflies dancing in my stomach.

Our last stop was a room with a large screen projecting video clips of Steve and those from his past. Instead of sitting on the benches, we went to the front and sat on the floor with our backs against them. Steve reminded me of the treats he’d collected from the bakery, and placed the bag between us. “I always go to this bakery, because not only do they have the best cakes, but at night they throw in a few extras that they couldn’t sell,” he explained excitedly, ripping the bag and laying it out flat. An array of colourful cupcakes and pastries were laid out in a box, and my mouth almost watered at the sight, “by the way, the cinnamon roll is mine.”

“Damn! I was just about to call dibs,” I pretended to sulk and he sighed, opening the box and ripping the pastry in half, handing me the piece that was slightly bigger, “oh I’m flattered.”

“I couldn’t possibly deprive you of it. It’s just heavenly,” we both took a bite at the same time and audibly groaned at how good it tasted. I giggled as I noticed the icing all around his mouth, “what? Is there something on my face?” I couldn’t stop laughing as he looked down as if he was trying to look at his own cheeks. I rolled up the sleeve of his jacket and wiped his face with my thumb.

“Did you get napkins by any chance?” I asked, as I realised my hand was now covered in sticky icing. Steve rummaged through the box and found a stray napkin at the bottom. I wiped off my hand and leaned back, laying my legs down on the ground as I propped the upper half of my body against the benches. “So, what’s this video about?”

“Well that’s me,” he pointed at the screen as the footage showed a group of soldiers walking through some trees, “and those are the soldiers I rescued from one of the Hydra bases. That’s my best friend, Bucky.”

“He’s a Super Soldier too, right?”

“Uh huh, but I can still kick his ass,” he winked, nudging me with his elbow. He shuffled closer to me and rested his arm on the bench behind me. I could feel the warmth from his skin on the back of my neck, and there was nothing I wanted more than to rest my head on his shoulder and snuggle up to him.

“Y/N, do you think it’s weird that I brought you here?” He asked shyly. I looked over at him and his brows were furrowed slightly, which just made me want to grab him in a hug and tell him not to worry.

“Not at all. I love learning about our country’s history, and who better to educate me than Captain America himself?” I smiled, and I saw his chest rise and fall as if he was letting out a breath he’d been holding, “I’ve had a really great time with you, Steve. Part of me wishes we could’ve skipped the first couple hours of the evening,” I joked. I was so comfortable in Steve’s company that I almost forgot about the awkward dinner we’d engaged in earlier.

“Can I confess something?”

“Of course.”

“When you introduced yourself, I was so jealous that you were Sam’s date and not mine. My eyes found you as soon as I stepped out of the car, and I don’t think they’ve left you all evening. I’ve loved getting to know you, chatting to you, laughing with you. I’m really glad you came tonight,” he fidgeted, playing with the hem of his shirt nervously. I tried to think of what to say, but I was speechless. Nobody has ever said anything like that to me before, and I certainly never expected to be overwhelmed in such a way by someone as amazing as Steve.

“I - I just don’t know what to say,” I breathed, my heart thumping so hard that it felt like it could explode at any moment.

“Perhaps we could start with this - Say that you’ll meet me again.” He sat up and faced me directly, a hopeful smile on his face. I sat up and placed my hand on top of his, giving it a comforting squeeze.

“Of course I will,” I spoke quietly, nearly whispering. I couldn’t quite believe what was happening. My head felt cloudy and tingles ran down my spine out of sheer excitement. Steve wanted to spend more time... with me! How did I get so lucky?

“I have an idea! How about, we meet right here? I’ll bring takeout, we can perhaps try and get a movie to work on the projector. It can be our spot,” I suggested, desperately hoping that I didn’t sound ridiculous. Steve grinned, squeezing my hand in return.

“I would love that.”

“Then it’s a date.”

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #fluff #the avengers #marvel #mcu #captain america x reader #captain america #sam wilson #falcon #chris evans x reader #chris evans #anthony mackie #oneshot

263 notes · View notes

nayutai · 5 years ago

Text

Baby Don’t Move

⇢ Pairing Yunho x Female OC | Office Worker AU

⇢ Word Count 6.010

⇢ Warnings Yunho has a filthy mouth and a huge dick, oral sex (female receiving), rough sex, cursing (in general), aaaand I think that’s it

⇢ Summary Naima Yancey is ambitious and determined so her promotion at DevTech comes as no surprise to anyone. What should be a joyous moment for her is tainted. The promotion comes with a real office, more money, and a higher status, but it also comes with close proximity to the office golden boy Yunho. He gets under her skin in a way no one ever has, but she’s determined not to let this oversized menace ruin this opportunity for her. Turns out, Yunho would rather ruin her instead.

The muted ding of the elevator sounds much too joyful to Naima. Her transfer to the accounts receivable department should be marked by the sound of a death rattle or a dying elephant. A twinkling little ding only makes her even more pissed off. She glances down at the contents of the box nestled in her arms to see the brand new name plate she’d been given for her new office.

Naima Yancey

Receivables Supervisor

The youngest supervisor in DevTech history according to HR. She guesses that anyone else in her position would be excited about the transfer she’s mentally griping about. It’s not every day that someone like her gets unexpectedly promoted to a supervisory position. Naima has only been with the company for three years and apparently she’d made the most of that time. She pauses next to a sea of cubicles to scan the numbers above the offices on either side of the employees rapidly typing away at their stations. Only a few of them even bother to give her a second glance and for that Naima is incredibly grateful. She finally spots her destination, hiking the cardboard box she’s unloaded her desk into a little higher on her hip. She takes half of a step and immediately regrets every life choice that led her to this point.

“Well look who we have here. Are you lost, Ravioli?” Naima grits her teeth at that god awful nickname, swallowing the scathing retort that’s burning her throat. The deep baritone voice sounding off somewhere over her left shoulder is the cause of every ounce of the work stress she carries in her shoulders like a boulder.

Yunho Jeong. Beholder of an unfair amount of undeserved beauty and the victim in Naima’s most murderous dreams.

“You were in the staff meeting when they announced my promotion, Yunho.” She deadpans. Her skin is starting to itch from the prolonged exposure to the man in front of her. The smirk that is practically permanently etched on his face does nothing but piss her even more. She wants to smack him until it disappears.

“I’m just messing with you, Ravioli. You know that. Welcome to Receivables.” He shoves his hands into the front pockets of his jeans as he starts backing away. “Try not to fuck it up!” Naima can feel the thick cardboard of her box bending to the forceful clench of her fists. The weight of of nearly fifty pairs of eyes keeps the scathing remark she wants to make from bubbling up.

Fucking Yunho. Naima hasn’t even been in Receivables for an hour and she’s already doubting if the extra money is worth the headache. Okay, who is she kidding? The extra money is definitely worth it. Getting ahead of her bills had felt like the pipe dream of a wistful millennial before it had become an unexpected reality just last week. No way she lets some oversized preteen bully ruin this for her.

Naima is almost done putting her things into her new desk when the sound of an office door loudly closing disturbs her concentration. She looks up to see the source of the noise is none other than Yunho himself. All of the offices on this floor conveniently have floor to ceiling windows next to the door which allows people directly across from each other to see into the other person’s office. Naima is absolutely horrified at the implications of this as Yunho stares her down with a satisfied smirk. It’s obvious now that he slammed his door on purpose to get her attention.

“This is the worst day of my life.” Naima mumbles to herself as she does her best to ignore Yunho’s gaze burning into her forehead.

IT arrives a few tense minutes later to set up her docking station and get her started on the training modules for her new job duties. She’s taking notes on how to perform certain functions in the billing system when she receives a chat notification from her work husband Knox Rivers back in her old department.

KR: Hey wifey how’s the swanky new digs?

NY: My office is DIRECTLY across from Yunho’s office

NY: I can literally see every move he makes and he can see mine

KR: Dreamville? My treat

Naima immediately perks up at the mention of the bar down the street that has become a favorite amongst their group of friends. It’s going to take a lot to make her feel good about working in such close proximity with Satan’s hardest working demon, but a free round of drinks is a great start.

NY: I’ll meet you downstairs at 5:30

Naima nearly bursts into tears when she steps off of the elevator and spots Knox leaning seated in the lobby playing a game on his phone. She’s always thought that he looked like Thor with his long hair and athletic build and right now a superhero is exactly what she needs. A giggle bubbles up from Naima’s throat at the red stain that creeps down Knox’s throat when she sneaks up on him to kiss his cheek.

“Come on, big guy. There’s a Blue Magic with my name on it and I intend to collect my due.” Naimah declares, clapping Knox on his broad shoulders.

“Lead the way, my lady.” He holds the door open like the gentleman he is with a dramatic flourish. Naima’s heart twinges a little. She misses the days when talking to him in person required her to lean back in her chair as opposed to taking an elevator ride.

A few other people from the office are already at Dreamville when Naima and Knox arrive. They’re quickly swept up in familiar gossip and more drinks than anyone has a right to consume on a Tuesday evening. She’s engaged in a dangerous game of darts with a new employee named Xavier when a horribly familiar voice rings out above all the noise in the bar. Her head whips in the direction the voice came from, but the dart flies from her fingers anyway nearly taking some poor girl’s eye out. She yells out an apology but apparently her almost victim has had a little too much to drink herself and simply waves her off.

“Nice aim, Ravioli. An inch to the left and you would’ve scored a perfect murder.” Yunho taunts. Naima crosses her arms across her chest in indignation. Her eyes watch him intently and therefore don’t miss the way his gaze drops to get a look at her cleavage. His jaw ticks and she wants nothing more than to comment on that but Xavier interrupts by extending his hand in Yunho’s direction as he introduces himself.

“Naima, you ready to leave? I was about to call an Uber.” Knox materializes out of nowhere, phone in hand and Naima’s eyes nearly pop out of her head when she sees that it’s nearing eleven. She hadn’t realized that they’d been there for so long.

“See you tomorrow, Ravioli. Later, Knox.” She’d almost forgotten that Yunho was still here. He winks at her before he turns to walk away and, despite the fact that he can no longer see her, Naima flips him off.

Naima is still fuming nineteen minutes later when the Uber arrives. She successfully dodges Knox’s first few questions about why she’s so mad, but he eventually wears her down. She’d forgotten that Knox becomes a wannabe psychologist that likes to talk about people’s feelings after he’s had a few drinks.

“What do you have against him? You’re probably the only person at the whole company that doesn’t get along with him.” Naima rolls her eyes skyward. Yunho the golden boy is apparently loved by everyone and it makes her seethe even more. She wracks her brain for someone at the company that she can add to her side and thankfully comes up with a name.

“Fake news! Saia in purchasing called him a douche nozzle last week and I am inclined to agree.” Naima is quite pleased with herself as she settles back into the plush seating of the SUV. Her satisfaction is short lived.

“Saia doesn’t count.” Knox counters quickly. “Yunho dated her younger sister and it ended badly so that just leaves you.”

“The night before my first day at DevTech, my friends from back home came to town to celebrate and we went to this super fancy restaurant.” The red light at the intersection bathes them both in its glow which is ironic in Naima’s opinion.

She regales Knox with the store of how her friend Keyanna had bought her a ravioli entree to go so that she could have her favorite food on her first day. Yunho had snuck up on her when she was in the break room, startling her to the point that she ended up dropping a ravioli on her white button up. Of course the evil bastard had laughed about it till he could barely stand. She’d had to walk around for the rest of the day with the sauce stain on her shirt and Yunho has called her Ravioli every day since then.

“That…” Knox pauses to piece his thoughts together. “okay, yeah, I can’t say I’d be too fond of him either after that.” He admits.

“See? He’s an asshole and I hope he steps on a lego every day for the rest of his miserable life.” Their Uber driver, who had remained silent aside from the quick hello when they’d gotten in her car, snorts at the curse Naima speaks into Yunho’s life.

“You know he teases you because he probably wants to fuck you right? Men aren’t as evolved as people would like to believe.” Knox points out. Naima withdraws from him as if he just told her to go fuck herself.

“If he thinks that being an asshole will grant him access to my pearly gates then he’s a bigger idiot than I thought he was.” She and the driver exchange a high five when she chimes in with her agreement. Naima makes a mental note to make sure that Knox tips her good for being an intellectual.

A wave of exhaustion washes over Naima when their apartment complex comes into view. Thoughts of a hot shower and her fluffy pillows makes the time required to drive to their part of the complex feel like an eternity. She bids the friendly Uber driver a safe and prosperous night before all but running towards her building with a wave to Knox tossed carelessly over her shoulder as he makes his way to the building directly across from hers.

“Morning, Killer.” Yunho is way too chipper this morning especially since Naima has already had to suffer through elevator chatter about how he won a drinking contest last night. It doesn’t help that now he’s bringing up her almost homicide.

“Don’t you have something else to do? Like your job?” Yunho pretends to recoil from her remark as he follows Naima to her office. She wishes she could just haul off and smack him but that wouldn’t bode well for her professional career.

He props himself up against the wall next to her office and it’s as she unlocking her door that she registers just how close he is to her. A small shift of her weight to her right foot would push her up against his chest. Her mind drifts back to what Knox had said last night. She side eyes him cautiously before turning fully to face him head on. If anyone were to ask, Naima would blame what she does next on residual alcohol still inhibiting her rational thought.

“Do you want to have sex with me?” Yunho blinks several times in shock but he recovers quickly. He flips around to take stock of the people still filtering into the office to see if anyone is within ear shot and is seemingly satisfied by the lack of people around them.

“I never pegged you to have an exhibition kink, Ravioli.” She curses herself at the way the low timbre of his voice resonates deep in her gut. The greasy smile on his face however, makes her want to puke.

“My kinks are none of your business. I’m just trying to prove a point. Now answer the question.”

“I can only imagine what that point is, but yes, I would absolutely love to ravish you.” He leans in even closer so that she can smell the minty scent of his toothpaste when he whispers in her ear. His closeness doesn’t make her recoil in the way that she thought it would and the reasoning behind that is definitely not something she’s willing to explore.

The second she gets her laptop booted up she’s tapping out a message to Knox.

NY: Lunch on me today. We need to talk.

KR: I’m all yours at 12:30

Naima is still pondering her conversation with Knox when she steps off of the elevator to go back to her office after lunch. He seems to think that the best way to get Yunho off her back is to fuck him. According to Knox and his personal knowledge of “guy logic”, that will get her out of Yunho’s system and his annoying behavior will cease. Naima isn’t so sure about that. She’s so far inside her own head that she doesn’t even hear someone calling her name until they tap her on her shoulder. Of course, it’s Yunho. Luck is just not on her side today.

“Ravioli, you should consider getting your ears checked. I called you four times.”

“And you should consider that maybe I just don’t want to talk to you.” She replies. He makes himself comfortable in her office as she drops her purse into one of the desk drawers to jump back into her work.

“Oh, don’t be that way, Ravioli. I thought we were past this animosity thing since you practically propositioned me in the hallway.” He looks so smug as he recalls her blunder from earlier. God he’s so infuriating. Naima adds this to her running list of why men should be removed from Earth. She says nothing, choosing to simply point towards her office door. Thankfully, he’s not too dense that he can’t take a hint and returns to his own office space.

She’s settled into a steady pace with her work when her computer pings with a message. The prospect of clearing out her dashboard and possibly being able to leave early is too sweet to break her stride. Two more subsequent pings from effectively breaks her concentration.

YJ: hey

YJ: you look so cute when you’re concentrating

YJ: don’t ignore me I’m sensitive 😭

She looks through the glass into Yunho’s office to see him already staring directly at her. His head being propped up on his hands suggests that he’s been doing it for a while. He blows a kiss in her which she returns with a middle finger. She raises her computer monitors so that he’s no longer able to see her face.

Next order of business: buying blinds

Naima groans out loud when her computer pings with yet another message. At this rate she’s going to have to stay late to get everything done. She halfway expects the new message to be another annoying attempt at conversation from Yunho but thankfully this one is from someone that she actually doesn’t mind talking to.

KR: hey did you hear that Yaya bought a new house?

NY: yeah she just texted me that she’s having a bbq this weekend to celebrate the closing

KR: you going? 👀

NY: don’t ask me a stupid question like that of course I’m going

KR: lmao okay so we can split an uber then

KR: wanna leave at like 3?

NY: yeah that’s fine with me!

Naima is so happy for Saturday to finally roll around that she could cry. Yaya had told her a few things on the menu on Wednesday and her mouth has been watering ever since. Her husband is a chef at some fancy restaurant so she knows that this will be the best food she’s had in a while.

Knox and Naima are both slack-jawed at the absolute grandeur of Yaya’s house as their Uber driver comes to a stop in the center of the horseshoe shaped driveway. She’d neglected to mention that her new house is actually a castle. Naima frowns when she spots Yunho’s flashy Mercedes amongst the cars already parked in the driveway, but she’s determined to have a good time despite his presence. They follow the sound of music and splashing to the backyard to see a majority of the DevTech staff in the backyard. They’re quick to strip down to their bathing suits to join in on the chicken fight in the pool.

Naima has just sent Alexis from marketing flying off of Xavier’s shoulders when Yaya announces that it’s time to eat. It’s a race to get out of the pool as everyone is hustling for a good spot in line. Naima is cursing the god awful heaviness that plagues her every time she steps out of a pool when she hears a low whistle from behind her. It’s Yunho and his eyes are trained directly on her ass. Big surprise there.

“Yellow is definitely your color, Ravioli.” He produces a large, fluffy towel seemingly out of nowhere, offering it to her. She’s hesitant to accept it but a quick glance towards the now empty table that had once held an assload of towels changes her mind.

“I think I would look just as good on you.” Yunho smiles as if he’s just hit her with the best pick up line known to man. He’s gotten quite brazen with his flirtatious attempts ever since he’d exposed his sexual intentions on Monday.

“You talk a big game but everyone knows that overly confident men are just…” Naimah trails off with a pointed look at the front of Yunho’s jeans as she takes a sip of her lemonade. “overcompensating.”

Yunho pokes at the inside of his cheek with his tongue as he considers the woman in front of him with amusement. He revels in the way she swallows nervously when he closes the gap between them. Every breath she takes causes her barely covered chest to graze against his but, to her credit, she doesn’t back away. Maybe it’s the alcohol, but being this close to Yunho is making her blood run hot. She chooses to blame it on her primitive instincts and not actual attraction, but even she knows that’s a lie.

“Didn’t your parents teach you not to speak on things you know nothing about, Ravioli?” She can’t decide what she’s more mad at, the nickname or the insinuation that this asshole just said she’s wrong. She’s not.

“Didn’t your parents teach you not to lie?” She bristles. Yunho’s sarcastic little grin only grows in response to her anger. It’s like he gets off on making her want to wring his neck.

“Admit it, Ravioli. You want this just as much as I do.” Naima gasps when Yunho suddenly wraps an arm around her wait, jerking her to him. He leans down so that he’s speaking directly into her ear and in that moment, Naima knows she’s a goner. All these months of resisting him and he’s about to break her by whispering in her ear. She wants to scream bloody murder. “All you have to do is say the word and I’ll take you higher than you’ve ever been.”

“Prove it.” Naima feels like she’s put the final nail in her own coffin. Yunho has successfully worn her down. She can’t see his face, but she doesn’t have to to know that he’s smiling like he’s just won the lottery.

“Let’s go, Ravioli.” Naima expects Knox to be disappointed to see her leaving with Yunho when she waves at him to say bye, but instead he wiggles his eyebrows at her suggestively. She makes a mental note to yell at him for that later.

The ride to Yunho’s apartment is entirely too short. Naima’s shoulders are wrought with tension as she follows him up the stairs. Part of her wants to turn and run, but a much larger part is telling her to stay to see this through. Yunho has spoken quite highly of his sexual prowess and she’s more curious than not on just how much of it is true.

Yunho is on her the second she toes off her shoes by the door. One of his large hands firmly holds her jaw in place while he ravages her mouth with his own. Naima clings to his shirt to both hold him to her and ground herself in the moment. She feels lightheaded but it’s not from lack of oxygen. He uses his grip on her jaw to pry her mouth open, furthering his claim on her. The hand not covering her jaw skims across the skin above her shorts before deftly undoing the button. Her lips chase his when Yunho pulls away but he avoids her advances.

“Your lips taste so sweet. I want to taste all of you.” Naima shivers at the roughness of his voice. His normal baritone is a lot to deal with but this is downright sinful. He roughly hauls her off her feet into his arms, causing a fresh wave of arousal to flood her panties.

She busies herself with leaving marks along the column of his neck, loving the way she can feel his gruff moans vibrating against her lips. The smack of Yunho’s hand hitting the wall to steady himself when she grinds her hips against his startles her into.

“Jesus fuck, you’re killing me, baby girl.” Naima smiles mischievously, letting her lips linger on his skin. Something about the pet name he called her makes the heat simmering in her belly grow even hotter. He tosses her on his oversized bed once he collects himself enough to finally make it to his bedroom. She watches him curiously as he turns to dig around in his nightstand. His hand reappears with several foil packets in his grip which he promptly drops onto the mattress for later use.

Clothes fly haphazardly as Yunho hastily strips them down till nothing but his boxers remain in place. He smirks when he notices Naima’s playful grin drop when she takes in the size of the bulge he’s sporting. His large hands grip her hips, flipping her onto her stomach and rustling her around to a more favorable position. Finally satisfied with the way her face is pressed into the expensive Egyptian cotton of his bed sheets, Yunho buries his face in her dripping cunt from behind. He groans at his first taste of her and her answering whine is nothing but appreciative at the way it vibrates against her.

Naima yelps when Yunho’s large palms suddenly land on her ass with a resounding smack. He soothes the sting with tender caresses against her flesh. His tongue never leaves her entrance as he continues to coax a seemingly endless stream of arousal from her. She has the sheets in a death grip, moving her hips as if to separate herself from Yunho’s lethal tongue but wherever she goes his face simply follows. The slurping sounds of him feasting on her are absolutely obscene but she’s way too far gone to be embarrassed. She doubts that she would be able to form a coherent sentence of protest even if she wasn’t.

“You’re so fucking wet. I could drown in this pretty pussy.” Naima keens at his filthy words, squirming restlessly as the pleasure builds and builds within her.

It’s no surprise when she tumbles over the edge with a strangled shout, but she’d expected for him to release her once he’d made her come. Much to her surprise, Yunho doesn’t seem to have any plans of stopping. He tongues her through her orgasm, sucking gently on her clit as he thrusts two fingers into her still spasming entrance. Her knees buckle immediately from the sharp pang of oversensitivity. Yunho pulls his fingers from her long enough to land another harsh smack to her ass while his other holds her hips in place. The discomfort bleeds into pleasure until she’s racing headfirst into a second orgasm.

“That’s it, baby. Let go. Give it all to me.” Naima swears she’s on the verge of blacking out when Yunho finally releases her. She collapses against the mattress when he relinquishes his grip on her, trembling from head to toe. His chest is warm against the sweat-slicked skin of her back when he covers his body with his own. He leaves chaste kisses along her shoulder as he loops an arm around her torso.

“Don’t tap out on me now, love. There’s still more fun to be had.” Yunho grinds his cock against her ass, smiling against her skin when he feels her shudder in his hold.

He pulls himself up on his knees, dragging Naima’s tired frame with him. He makes quick work of removing his boxers and rolling on one of the condoms he’d grabbed earlier. She jerks when the head of his latex covered cock bumps against her sensitive clit as he covers himself in the slick still leaking from her cunt. Yunho watches the back of her head like a hawk as he slowly presses himself against her entrance. He swears quite creatively at the way her muscles lock down on him.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Yunho!” Naima drops her head to rest on her arms, doing her best to relax. He reaches underneath her to rub circles into her clits and succeeds in pushing forwards a few more inches.

His breath catches in his throat when she pulls her hips before pushing back against him to sink down a little further on his thick length. They work together until he’s finally seated balls deep inside her. Yunho’s eyes roll back in his head at the tight squeeze of her perfect cunt. He’s been inside quite a few women in his day, but this feels almost like uncharted territory. He hisses when she flexes around him involuntarily, tightening even further though he didn’t think that was even possible.

“I’m going to wreck this pussy, baby.” He punctuates his statement by withdrawing till only the tip remains, pushing back in with a purposeful thrust of his hips. Naima nearly chokes on the pitiful whine that claws its way out of her throat. “You’re gonna feel me in here for days.”

To his credit, he tries to keep his pace even and not too fast. He really does. His fingers are probably bruising her skin from how tightly he’s gripping her hips but it’s the only thing keeping him grounded and sane at this point.

“You call this wrecking me? I could’ve done this at home with my Rabbit.” Naima can admit that Yunho’s dick was a hard pill to swallow at first, but she’s thoroughly adjusted and in need of more. Judging by the way his hips still she’s about to get just what she was aiming for. She gasps when he grabs a fistful of her hair, yanking her upright so that he can whisper in her ear.

“Didn’t I tell you to watch that pretty little mouth of yours?” He practically growls in her ear as he grinds against her cervix. The pain mixes with the pleasure in a way that’s starting to make her lightheaded.

“No, you didn’t.” She responds breathily. Her fingernails dig into his thighs painfully but Yunho doesn’t care even a little bit.

“Well, I should’ve.” He shoves her back towards the mattress not giving her even a few seconds to get her bearings before he’s rearing back to slam back into her tight heat.

She shouts his name, squirming in his iron grip but he shows her no mercy. The time for that has past. Yunho’s hips piston in out of her at a furious pace. His gaze is fixated on the way her pussy creams on his dick with every thrust. His chest rumbles in protest when manages to pull away from him enough for his cock to fall out of her.

“Don’t run from me, Naima. You wanted this dick and now you got it.” She keens at the sound of her real name coming out of his mouth. The way his husky tone wraps around the syllables should be illegal. He fists the sheets next to her head with one hand as he uses the other to reposition her hips to allow him to slide back inside. His legs straddle both of hers, giving him the leverage he needs to fuck her into the mattress.

Naima’s fingernails are leaving crescent shaped marks in Yunho’s wrists as she holds on for dear life. She’s never been so thoroughly fucked in all her life. He’s reaching spots inside her that she didn’t even know existed until now. She’s on the verge of tears when he slows his frantic pace. He lowers himself so that his larger frame dwarfs hers once more. His arms looped under hers to hold her close to him. Yunho resumes his movements, opting for a much more relaxed cadence. The purposeful grind of his hips is just as overwhelming if not more so after the intensity from before.

“This is my pussy now.” Yunho grunts into her ear. He sucks marks into every inch of skin that his lips can reach. “No one will ever fuck you this good. Never fuck you this deep. You’re all mine.”

Naima bites down hard on a pillow that she must have grabbed at some point as she clenches around him hard. It dawns on her vaguely that Yunho hasn’t touched her clit once. She’s about to come from penetration alone. A feat she’s never been able to accomplish. The very Earth feels like it’s opened up beneath her when the orgasm that had been flirting with her senses finally washes over her. She feels him grow impossibly harder inside her as he reaches his own end. Black spots dance across her vision when the throbbing sensation of him filling the condom triggers a smaller, biting orgasm.

She’s surprised that she manages to stay conscious if only barely. Her surprise only grows when she feels a warm towel gently wiping between her legs. Her shock reaches a fever pitch when Yunho’s fingers start working into her calf muscles. She chooses to stay silent out of fear that he might stop if caught being nice.

“You done pretending to be asleep? Or did I actually fuck you stupid?” She can practically hear the smile in his voice as his fingers climb higher to her thighs. So much for peacefully enjoying this massage.

“I like you better when you don’t speak.” His amused laughter brings a smile to her own face despite her attempts to tamp it down. She shivers when he places a chaste kiss on the swell of her ass before going back to his ministrations on her legs. Knox is never going to let her hear the end of this once he finds out.

She’s about to go insane. Naima’s stomach has growled twelve times in as many minutes and if she doesn’t eat something soon there will be fatal consequences. She checks her phone once more to check Knox’s location and nearly cries when it says that he’s arrived at DevTech. Just a few minutes stands between her and hot bacon, egg, and cheese croissant and an extra large caramel macchiato.

The sight of Knox navigating the sea of cubicles with her breakfast in hand may as well be the second coming of Christ. She throws her arms around her neck the second he steps into her office. He pretends to be disgusted when she pecks him on his cheek repeatedly. Knox takes a seat in one of the leather chairs in front of her desk to talk before he goes back downstairs to work. Their conversation when Yunho suddenly burst through the door.

“What the hell are you doing?” Naima is appalled at the way he’s just invited himself into her office without even having the decency to knock first.

“I should be asking you that. I asked you for the Murchison report fifteen minutes ago but I guess you were too busy with your little boy toy here to actually do your fucking job.” Knox stands, mouth fixed to defend her, but she holds up her hand to stop him.

“Knox, can you excuse us please?” Naima says sweetly. Her tone is sweet and even, but there’s a hard edge to it that tells Knox she’ll be able to handle Yunho’s temper tantrum just fine.

Naima wraps her sandwich up as she motions for Yunho to have a seat in the chair Knox has just vacated. She shrugs her shoulders when he refuses, crossing her modest office to lock the door and close the blinds she’d installed.

“What the actual fuck is wrong with you, Jeong? Did you fall and hit your head? How dare you come to my office and insinuate that I’m not doing my job?.” He can tell that she’s working hard to keep from yelling at him but her words feel like a slap in the face either way.

“Look, I just need the Murchison report so that I can finish some paper-” Naima doesn’t even let him finish his sentence. She has no patience for him and his bullshit.

“Cut the bullshit, Yunho. The Murchison report wouldn’t be useful for anything other than end of year reporting which we are eight months away from so what the fuck do you actually want from me?” She’s seething. DevTech has a super relaxed company culture but HR still wouldn’t take too kindly to her punching another employee in the throat.

“Why didn’t you text me back yesterday?” Naima is taken aback. She remembers receiving a few texts from him on Sunday — how he got her number she doesn’t know — but it wasn’t anything that she felt warranted a response.

“Why would you want me to?”

The more they talk, the more Naima realizes that they went into that bedroom with very different ideas of what was going to happen afterwards. She’d intended for it to be a one time thing for him to try and prove her wrong which he’d succeeded in doing. Nothing more, nothing less. Obviously, Yunho had other ideas that went far beyond the four walls of his bedroom.

“This is new territory for me. I’ve never been jealous over women because I can get a new one in five minutes. I’ve never had a problem in that category.”

“Get to the point, Yunho.” She’s quickly growing bored of this conversation and she’s ready for it to be over.

“The point is that I want to see where this goes. Are you down for that?”

“No, you’re an asshole.”

“I mean, yeah, that’s true, but I’m cute and I’ll eat you out till you cry so what’s it gonna be?” He looks so hopeful that part of Naima wants to reject him again just to mess with him, but she’s not totally heartless. She decides to make him a deal.

“I’ll give you one week and then we’ll go from there now about this eating out business…” She trails off, looking at him suggestively.

“Come home with me after work and I’ll give you what you want and more.” The mischievous grin on his face promises another day of limping around and Naima is excited to say the least.

“You’ve got a deal. Now get out of my office.” She deadpans as she starts to unwrap the breakfast sandwich she hadn’t been able to finish earlier. He catches her off guard when he swoops in to steal a kiss from her lips as his “parting gift”.

“Later, Ravioli.”

She touches her fingers to her lips as she watches him walk back to his own office through her open door. It’s going to be an interesting week.

#ksmutclub #yunho smut #ateez smut #yunho x black oc #ateez x black oc #this is borderline pwp #plot where?#ateez fanfic #yunho fanfic #ateez yunho

91 notes · View notes

princeluckybug13 · 4 years ago

Text

@mean-scarlet-deceiver wanted to see my timeline, so here it is! Obviously this is for the Skarloey Railway and is completely based on my canon. So this is not meant to be super accurate to the any actual timeline. Hopefully this makes some semblance of sense, and I did rearrange many episodes (that are getting major overhauls). Feel free to ask any questions, and I’ll do my best to answer!

(ps Jobey, the project was just my horrible abomination of my “Murphy’s Law” AU lol)

Crosspatch (1864)

Bucking Bronco/The Grand Opening (1865)

Rheneas and the Dinosaur/Push Me, Pull You (1866)

The Old Bridge (1867)

Stick-in-the-Mud (1868)

Skarloey Storms Through (1871)

Wharf and Peace (1874)

Missing Trucks/Missing Cars (1875)

Skarloey Remembers (May 1952)

Sir Handel (May 1952)

Peter Sam and the Refreshment Lady (May 1952)

Old Faithful (June 1952)

A Smooth Ride (1953)

The Refreshment Lady's Tea Shop/The Refreshment Lady's Stand (1953)

Rusty Saves the Day (1957)

Which Way Now? (1957)

Trucks (1958)

Home at Last (1958)

Rock n Roll (1958)

Little Old Twins (1959)

Dunkin' Duncan (1959)

Trusty Rusty (1959)

Special Funnel (January 1961)

Steamroller (March 1961)

Passengers and Polish (July 1961)

Gallant Old Engine (July 1961)

Duncan Does it All (May 1962)

The Runaway Elephant (1962)

Duncan Drops a Clanger (1962)

Rusty to the Rescue (February 1963)

Duck and Dukes (June 1964)

Sleeping Beauty (August 1964)

Patience is a Virtue (1982)

Peter Sam and the Prickly Problem (1982)

Pop Special (May 1983)

Sir Handel Comes Home (April 1984)

Fearless Freddie (May 1984)

Ding-a-Ling (June 1984)

The Party Surprise (December 1984)

The Magic Lamp (August 1988)

Mountain Marvel (September 1988)

Duncan Gets Spooked (October 1988)

Rusty and the Boulder (September 1989)

Toby's Discovery (October 1989)

Speedkiller (April 1996)

Dirty Water (May 1996)

Sir Handel's Plan (May 1996)

I Name This Engine… (September 1996)

Ivo(Skarloey) the Brave ( December 1996)

Cool Truckings (January 2005)

Whistle Trouble/Tuneful Toots (March 2005)

Wash Behind Your Buffers (April 2005)

Mighty Mac (July 2005)

Duncan and the Hot Air Balloon (July 2006)

Duncan’s Bluff (August 2006)

Duncan and the Old Mine (November 2006)

Don't Bother Victor! (April 2012)

Blue Mountain Mystery (October 2012)

The Switch (July 2013)

Luke's New Friend (August 2013)

Duncan and the Grumpy Passenger (September 2014)

Duncan the Humbug (December 25, 2014)

#ttte #i really hope this isnt too nonsensical #a lot of the episodes are getting really fleshed out #so uh #tada i guess #feel free to send asks about it #it makes sense to me lmao #lets see how this goes #Skarloey Railway #timeline

14 notes · View notes

mrarthureames · 4 years ago

Text

things Eames has done

- constantly wakes me up with freshly made coffee and breakfast, sometimes goes to the bakery and the florist and gets me baked treats and flowers too.

- the way he’ll sit patiently after we’re both exhausted from sex and rub any cramps away I’m having, he’ll also get up and bring me water and a washcloth should I need one.

- the lifting me, honestly there’s times when he’ll just swoop me up and carry me upstairs to bed or into the car when we’re going to my doctors etc - not only is it super cute and makes me feel safe and loved...I also low-key feel like I’m in a Disney movie.

- his love of sneakers, he appreciates and loves his footwear and he gets so excited when we go shoe shopping for him

- the happiness he gets from buying tourist things like magnets and mugs, they’re always a few euros but he gets so chuffed and pleased and our fridge looks epic!

- His study! Oh gosh his study, it’s warm, it’s relaxed and it’s so comfortable. I can smell the wood, the spice and the leather and god I love it. I always feel so chuffed when he invites me in, I love looking at his work, seeing his things everywhere and watching him work on something, seeing him really focus is such a pleasure of mine. Eames study just radiates comfort for me.

- the way his instinct works, he knows when I’m stressed, when I’m anxious or low and he’ll tend to me. He doesn’t try to fix me, he just tells me he is there and he’s not going anywhere. He speaks for me, sometimes literally - he’ll talk for me to my psychiatrist or doctor when I shut down. He’ll tell me as many times as I need to hear that I’m safe and that everything will be okay.

- physical care; the times when he’s carried me to the bath, washed and brushed my hair, when he looks out my clothes for me, helps me out of bed and helps me get dressed if I end up so low I don’t have the energy to do these things myself. He’d never let me fall into such a deep depression where I don’t wash or my hair gets matted, he knows I couldn’t bear that so he takes care of it, takes care of me

- the protectiveness; the walking on the outside of the sidewalks, the holding doors open and chairs out for me, the putting his arm around me and the way his hand will brush against mine when we’re out, his way of saying ‘I’m here’

- the milkshakes! God they’re SO good, he makes them exactly how I like them and he always makes me one when I’m in need of a little comfort

- he tells me stories about his wonderful grandfather all the time, stories about his grandfather when he was a boy, a solider and when he took care of Eames. He loved and trusted me enough to let me come and visit his grandfathers grave with him and we stood and paid our respects to a wonderful man together.

- the sentimental gifts he’s gotten me over the years - he got me the deeds to my childhood home and he found my cherished stuffed elephant I had as a child and brought him back to me.

- the fact I don’t even need to say ‘can we get Starbucks?’ anymore - he just assumes I’ll want a latte and will make a stop

- the way he is with our dogs, the lil head kisses he gives them, the way he’ll talk to them, tell them how they are all good boys and how proud he is when they follow a command and do as we tell them - he is the best dog dad ever

- one time in Paris, he took me to all the bougie shops I wanted to go to but then we came back to our apartment, got drunk and we danced to all his rap and grime music and had filthy sex for the majority of the evening

- the way he consults me before he makes any major decisions because he values and respects my input - he does this for trips, for any big purchases or even simple things like babysitting Jack, he always asks what I think first

- the touches: the way he puts his hand on my lower back or puts it on my knee or holds my hips in the shower, it’s such a subtle way of showing me a little affection and intimacy

- the way he is during sex: he hates coming before me and will do everything in his power to have me come first

#mrwilliameames

3 notes · View notes

dynamoe · 2 years ago

Text

the OTHER Seattle Elephant Super Car Wash neon sign (also demolished).

The most beautiful landmark in Seattle (now gone)

it's lesser twin, also gone

... and my version

#neon #neon sign #elephant #seattle #vintage neon #vintage sign #space needle #elephant super car wash #car wash

118 notes · View notes

luv-surveys · 4 years ago

Text

Have you ever started reading a book and wondered if you’d read it before? yes i have. What has been bothering you a lot lately? the fact that i’m sick and super behind on all of my homework but can’t do anything about it. What (or who) have you been missing lately? i’ve been missing home lately since i’m going home this weekend for the first time in a few months. Are you trustworthy? i’d like to believe so. Did your parents teach that white lies were ok? they never specified but i was taught that lies in general are bad. Have you ever hallucinated? yes. Do you sleep with your door open or closed? i sleep with my bedroom door open, but i sleep with my dorm door closed. What flags do you have in your room, if any? i don’t have any flags. What (or who) is the best thing that ever happened to you? i’d probably say beginning to play music in fourth grade, as that really set me down the path that i’m on right now as a student in music school. What is the worst decision you ever made? probably beginning to let my anxiety control me -- it led me down a path that i’m still recovering from, a year later. Do you miss college? no, given that i’m in college right now... Have you ever called a teacher “mom”? i once called my french teacher “mom” because i accidentally said “madame” without the d so it sounded like “ma-ame” = “mom.” What is your favorite arcade game? probably skee-ball. i used to play that all the time growing up. Do you feel neglected? no. What school subject(s) are/were your best? definitely french and english. Are you allergic to grass? no. Do you remember to water plants? no... hence why i don’t own plants anymore. What season is your birthday in? it’s in fall. Name 3 creative people you know. my friend sophie, my friend danielle, and my friend dan. Name 3 YouTubers you aspire to be like. i’d say aspen ovard, jasmine from tbhstudying, and ava jules. What color was your first car? i’ve never owned a car. What year did you graduate? i graduated this year, 2020. When was the last time you saw the person you currently have feelings for? last saturday. Have you ever been scammed? yes. Are you allergic to pollen? yes :( What style of wedding dress do you like best? probably ballgown. Are you over your first love? i’m like 90% there. Do you talk on the phone a lot? pretty often. Would you rather call or text? probably text. Do you always answer your phone? no, i only answer if i recognize the number. When was the last time you went to a party? there really haven’t been any parties since quarantine started, but my friend did have a birthday in may, so probably then. What was the last thing you ate? chicken noodle soup. What’s the last book you checked out from the library? i checked out like nine books, all young adult fantasy. Do you have a twitter? no. If so, what was the last thing you tweeted? nothing. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? the guy i’m seeing. What’s the last thing you cooked on the stove? pancakes. What color is the cover of the last notebook you used? white and gold. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? a girl on my snap. Who sent the last e-mail you got? my flute professor responding to my email about a rental. What song is currently stuck in your head? “look what you made me do” by taylor swift Do you have a favorite shape? probably circle. What color are the sheets on your bed? at home, they’re yellow. in my dorm, they’re pink, What time do you usually go to bed? usually, i go to bed between 11 and 12. Do you ever use coloring books? no. Are you planning on watching the Olympics? when they actually happen, yes. Do you pronounce the word “often” with or without a “t” in the middle? with the t. Have you ever been on a trapeze? no. Do you enjoy popping bubble wrap? yes of course. Are there any waterfalls near where you live? no. Do you like seafood? not particularly -- i do like shrimp, though. Have you ever had to wear a uniform for anything? yes, for marching band. If so, what did it look like? it was a maroon jacket, black bibbers, black long socks, black marching shoes, white gauntlets, white gloves, and a maroon shako. and under we had to wear our tour shirts and spandex/leggings. Do you personally know anyone who is an author? yes, my dad is. Do you own a Polaroid camera? nope. Do you enjoy baking? i love baking! What’s your favorite type of flower? right now, daisies. Last time (if ever) you were on an airplane, where were you going? home from florida. Do you know anyone who is left-handed? i have a couple left-handed friends and family members. What is something you think is underrated? probably classical music. too many people think it’s boring but there are some really amazing pieces. Around what temperature do you consider it to be too hot outside? probably around 85 degrees. In what ways do you expect your life to be different one year from now? i expect covid to not be as big of an issue. How often do you travel outside of the state/province you live in? probably around once a month at most. What’s a hobby you used to have, but don’t anymore? definitely reading. i used to read all the time, and now i just don’t have the time or motivation. What has been your favorite job you’ve had so far? i’ve never had a job. What’s your favorite kind of salsa/dip to go with tortilla chips? probably guacamole. Do you wash your car by hand or drive through a car wash? i don’t have a car. Where is the farthest north you’ve traveled to? alaska. Farthest south? florida. East? russia. West? again, alaska. How often do you run the dishwasher? at my house, we run the dishwasher every night. Do you wash your face at the sink or in the shower? i wash it in the shower. Name a stereotype about your gender that you don’t fit. i don’t enjoy wearing dresses whatsoever. Name a stereotype about your age that you don’t fit. i don’t have any interest in trying drugs or smoking. Do you have any unusual decorations in your home? we have a “butler” named jeeves, a family of elephants on a window sill facing away from the front door for good luck, and a couple other things. Do you have any uncommon kitchen appliances, such as espresso machines, waffle irons, etc? we have a panini maker and other things like that. What did your parents major/minor in in college, if they went? my mom majored in psychology while my dad majored in business. Has either of their careers influenced what career you chose or want to pursue? nope. What is the highest level math class you’ve completed? precalculus. How old were you when you learned how to ride a bike? probably around 7. How old were you when you learned how to swim? i’d say 10ish. How do you react when someone is rude to you? i get annoyed but try to remain sweet and kind so i don’t stoop to their level/they don’t have anything against me. Have you ever had a friend who was too clingy? yes, and it was annoying. What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? probably snowstorms/blizzards. Why is your least favorite season your least favorite? i hate winter because it’s cold and depressing. Do you have a Netflix account? yes. Have you ever had an animal get into your attic? yeah, occasionally that happens. Where is your favorite place to go on vacation? i enjoy traveling to europe since there’s so much history there. How long does it take to get there? it’d be about a six hour flight. When was the last time you started a “new chapter” of your life? this fall when i started college. What room in your home do you spend the least amount of time in? i’d say our downstairs bathroom -- i never use that bathroom. What is the last random act of kindness you did? i can’t really remember since i’ve been alone and sick for the past few days. Do you do anything to reduce the amount of electricity you use? not really... Are you usually open to trying a new food that you aren’t familiar with? yes, but if it’s some type of body part (like liver) then no. Do you listen to Panic! At The Disco? no. Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? nope. Is there a song you can’t stop listening to atm? not currently. Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you couldn’t say it back? no. If your Facebook status doesn’t get any likes/comments, does it bother you? i never post on facebook. Which friend do you confide in most? the guy i’m seeing haha. Do you wear a cross? no. What is your opinion on Arby’s? it’s good and their fries are amazing. When you have your own kitchen, how will it be done? i’d like an island definitely, and lots of counter space. i’d want it to be an open layout too. What is your favorite doughnut? probably jelly. Do you have a hot tub? If so, where is it located? no way. Did you read the Twilight series, or jump on the bandwagon after the movie? i have never read the entire series or been interested in it. What is your favorite party game? wii party or cards against humanity. Do you or your parents rake your yard? my parents do. Were you pro-Obama? nope, but i couldn’t vote anyway. What is your favorite scent from Bath & Body Works? i think a thousand wishes? What was the last illegal thing you did? probably speeding when i was driving. Who did you last go to the movies with? i think my sister, her boyfriend, and my ex. What color was the last vehicle you were in? white. Do you have any family members in the military right now? nope. Is there a ceiling fan in the room you’re in? no. When was the last time you wished time would move faster? during my class earlier today. Are there any owls in your room (as decor, of course)? nope. Have you ever heard voices? Audibly? no. Do you believe in angels and demons? yes. Who is the worst neighbor you have ever had? we have neighbors that accuse us of things we don’t do and get into fights with us over stupid things. Did your Barbies go on dates? yes! If you’re not straight, who was the first person you came out to? i’m straight. Where did you meet your first crush? school. Do you remember the first time your first crush ever said hi to you? nope. Do you ever go places with wet hair? occasionally, but i try not to. Who is your favorite little girl? probably my cousin. What do you want the most in life? happiness. What is a decision you’ve made that changed your entire life? my college decision. Do you ever wonder what kind of person you’d have turned out to be if a certain event never happened to you? occasionally, yeah. When you’re home alone, do you still shower with the bathroom door closed? yep, i keep it closed and locked. If you could have anyone’s singing voice, whose would you choose? maybe ariana grande. What are your top 3 favorite genres of music? classical, jazz, and electroswing. Where did you buy your dishes from? i’m pretty sure my mom gets them from williams-sonoma. Do you think Mars will be colonized in your lifetime? not in my lifetime. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought that turned out to be a waste of money? probably some type of appliance that i never use. What’s something you’ve bought that turned out to be way more useful than you anticipated? my shower shoes! Have you ever been on a ship? yeah. Do you ever take intentional breaks from checking/posting on social media? nope. Who was Van Halen’s better singer - David Lee Roth, or Sammy Hagar? i don’t know what you’re talking about lol. Which fictional character has the most memorable quotes? maybe dumbledore from harry potter? i can’t think of anyone off the top of my head. What’s a class you did not take in school, but now wish you had? forensic sciences. Have you ever been to either of your parents’ workplaces? all the time. What do you think of the ‘Healthy At Every Size’ movement/philosophy? no... not every size is healthy bruh. Have you ever been bitten so hard that their teeth marks were there after? yes. Ever been given a hickey? (Love bite) yeah. Ever gave one? nope. Are you more of an outgoing type or shy type? more shy. Do you think it’s weird if guys wear make-up like eyeliner? nah. Are you self conscious? If so what are you self conscious about? a lot, but mainly my height and paleness. Are you flirty at all? sometimes. Are you racist at all? no. Would you ever date a disabled person? (Be honest) depends on the disability, but more likely than not, no. If you found a baby randomly by itself what would you do? probably look around for parents, and if they’re not there, contact authorities. Would you rather adopt or have your own child? i’d rather have my own. What would you class as cheating on someone? purposefully seeking a romantic relationship/interaction with another person. Do you try to be politically correct? i try to. What’s your favorite kind of sea critter? maybe starfish. Have you ever tasted locally-made honey before? no. As far as earrings go, would you rather wear hoops or studs? hoops! Do you find P.E. humiliating, or think schools shouldn’t teach it? i don’t think it’s humiliating, but from my experience, i don’t know if it’s worth teaching. Do you recycle? yeah. Are you interested in current world issues? for the most part. Do you think you are mature, or immature? mostly mature. What kind of career are you interested in? i’m interested in teaching or performing music. Do you own a pair of sunglasses? yes. Do you use bobby pins, hair clips, or elastic hair ties? Which? i use all of the above. How badly do you get acne? (If at all) i barely get any acne. What’s the best way to cope with a breakup? remember all the things you hated about them and distract yourself. also, a glow-up and showing off your successes never hurts. If someone dislikes you, what is most likely to be the reason? probably because they think i’m egotistical. How many text messages do you have in your inbox atm? 72. When was the last time you had a difficult decision to make? probably deciding whether or not i should stay with the guy i’m seeing. In school, what subjects do/did you find the most difficult? math! Do you still speak to the person you had your first kiss with? not really. Where did you meet the last person you swapped numbers with? here at college. Who was the last person to add you as a friend on Facebook? a kid from my theory class. Who was the last person that asked if you were okay? my roommate, because i’ve been unhealthy. What does your handwriting look like? it’s pretty bubbly and very neat. Do you use any products on your hair, other than shampoo and conditioner? yes, i use dry shampoo and dry conditioner. Who were your best friends in primary school? lindsey. Do you still speak to any of them? nope. What was the last thing you bought from a vending machine? i think candy. What color hair did your first crush have? blond. What type of shoes do you find the most comfortable? moccasins! Are you more masculine or feminine? more feminine, definitely. If you could design your own mug, what would you put on it? something minimalist, like a tiny illustration. What is the best beach you’ve been to? the beach at ocean city, maryland. What is one thing you physically can’t do? i cannot do a pull-up, nope. Have you ever been to a funeral? yep. Have you ever visited your state’s capitol building? no. Have you ever visited your nation’s capitol building? yes. Do/did you have a favorite seat in church? yeah, the one on the left close to the front. What is your favorite park? probably six flags? or disney? Have you ever felt an earthquake? nope. Do you chew gum regularly? no. Where did you go on your first train ride? i think when i was a baby. Do you know anyone with a dual citizenship? yep. What sports teams do you root for, if any? (Extra points for Boston fans.) i don’t root for any sports teams. Do you dunk your cookies in milk? no ma’am. What is something you are confident about? my eye color. Have you ever been physically addicted to a substance? What? i’ve been addicted to afrin during colds, but i always manage to tear myself away. How do you feel about needles? they’re not great, but i’m not particularly scared of them. What is your favorite accent to listen to? i love scottish accents. What was the reason you last got dressed up? church. Have you ever been the subject of cruel rumors? not really. ^ What were they? -- Do you prefer loose or form-fitting clothing? more form-fitting. ^ What about on your preferred gender? more form-fitting as well. What do you do when you are really, really mad? i go somewhere to be alone so i can cool off. Would you rather go naked than wear fur? i’d rather wear fur, but i wouldn’t like it. Do you put a line through your 7’s? no. ^ What about your Z’s? nope. What is one thing that someone could do to you that is unforgivable? cheat on me if we’re in a relationship. Are you able to forgive and forget? it’s hard, but sometimes. Do you like cold pizza? no. What is your favorite fruit? pineapple! What about your favorite fruit juice, if it differs from solid fruit? white grape juice has my heart. Do you like broccoli and cheese? i’ve never had it but it sounds yummy. What about potatoes and cheese? oh yeah that’s good. Have you written a letter by hand, lately? To whom? yep, to the guy i’m seeing. Toaster or toaster oven? toaster. What are you most known for? being a musician haha. Do you have any reputations? What are they? i don’t believe so. Do you wear band shirts? nope. ^ What band was on the last one you wore? -- Do you own any hats? Describe them. yeah, i own a black adidas cap and a white cap. What about masks, you got any? Describe those. oh, i have plenty... thanks covid. i have a black one, a white one, a pink one, a brown one, a green camo one, and a blue floral one. What was the last thing to leave you speechless? probably my flu since it hurts to talk LOL. Do your parents like your friends? If they don’t, why not? yep. Have you been called a bad influence? no way. Describe your favorite pair of socks. i like all my pairs of black socks. Have you experienced any life-changing news, events, etc, lately? not really. Have any self-done piercings? nope. Ever pierced someone else? nooo. Do you get distracted easily? sometimes, but not if i’m focused on homework. Is talking to strangers enjoyable for you, or stressful? it’s stressful usually. How do you feel about getting new neighbors? it’s exciting! How many ceiling fans are in your home? one. Do you tweet your life away? nope. How do you feel about shameless self promoting? i don’t mind it if it isn’t too in the way. When reading words. like. this. do. you always pause after the periods? yep. What about screaming when reading something IN ALL CAPS? uh-huh.

6 notes · View notes

surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

Text

Survey #282

“daddy’s flown across the ocean / leaving just a memory / a snapshot in the family album / daddy, what’d you leave behind for me?”

What is your favorite type of dance? I like modern dances, especially those unusual or creepy with unique music. They’re the dances I look forward to watching in dance competitions. Do you find making scenes in public fun? Oh fuck no. Lemonade or pink lemonade? Pink is Supreme in so many ways. Where do you feel safest? At home, especially if Mom is here. Have you ever been to a gay pride parade? No, but I’d love to. Would you take your dream job if it were out of the country? No. I don’t want to move to Africa. What do you like to do when you're home alone? HAHA okay so I almost exclusively watch Unus Annus when Mom isn’t home because I will almost without a doubt cackle at least once, and… explaining why I’d be laughing would be WILD. UA is a fucking gift & I’mma miss it when it’s gone. What kind of music calms you down? My best bet is nostalgic music that I hold very close, like Ozzy. The soundtracks to SotC and SH2 are also magical when it comes to soothing me. Who did you last go to a park with? Uhhhh… probably not since I took family pictures for someone. Got some nice ones. Have you ever been robbed? Thankfully, no. Are you working, a student, both, or neither? Neither, and at nearly 25, it’s fucking humiliating. I’m thinking of appealing my disability case (you very rarely get it the first time), but of course self-doubt and anxiety just slaps me across the face again and again by asking, “Do you really need it?” That shit is agonizing. Very highly regarded people in my life agree that it’s realistic for me, at least at this moment, while I sort out my mental health. I don’t plan on being on it forever, fuck no. But right now I am, no matter what anyone says, a leech in my home. What's your favorite holiday? Christmas. I prefer Halloween’s “vibe,” of course, but I am much more excited and just thankful at Christmastime, especially now as an aunt with children who *understand* the holiday. Their joy and excitement is enough of a gift to me. It’s always really hard on Mom because she’s convinced she doesn’t do enough (she cries at least once like… every year), but my sisters and I always reassure her. It’s also a nice opportunity to see Dad and my stepmom, also with my sister’s family, and once again we get to see the kids so happy. But enough about them; what I love most about Christmas is I generally am able to put my troubles into perspective and take the time to remember I am, in the big picture, lucky to have what and who I do. And SNOW!!!!! If you can’t tell I’m stoked for Christmas. Do you prefer male or female friends? Both are great, but I’m more relaxed with female friends because of the whole “scared of men” ordeal. What's your favorite dessert? Biiiiihhhhh lemme get my hands on ice cream. Do you ever go on chatroulette or omegle? Noooo, I never did. That shit creeps me out. Besides, I’m shy. What kind of tea do you drink? None. Do you know anyone in a gang? Not to my knowledge… What color is your fridge? White. We decided to use the fridge already in this house versus our old one. Is your phone mostly on vibrate, silent, or ringtone? It’s just about always on vibrate. Do you own black sunglasses? I don’t own any sunglasses. Are you currently looking for a job? Fuck if I know. Not actively, but if something suitable magically popped up, I’d definitely pursue it. Do you watch MTV? No. Do you like to tell people who you like? Historically, I tend to keep my mouth shut about it to people who know that love interest unless explicitly asked, and even then, it depends on if I think they’ll keep their mouth shut. How often do you braid your hair? It’s too short to be braided. I very rarely had it braided beforehand. What color is your microwave? Black. Do you wash your face in the morning when you wake up? If I remember, especially if I’m groggy. Are you interested in the ocean? No more or no less than the average person. What's a big turn on for you? Keeping physical stuff outta this, I’m just such a fuckin sucker for being authentically romantic lmao. Have you ever thought about being a teacher? Heeeeeelllllll no. What's the first thing you do when you turn your computer on? Close out of the stuff that automatically pops up after it starts. Do you drink Gatorade? Ugh, ew, no. Do you hate when people replace 0's with O's? EX: 9:OO AM. Lol no, it’s honestly aesthetically pleasing in some formats. Did you hate riding the bus? Some of my best school memories are the long bus rides home w/ Jason so uh- Do you ever use XOXO in texts, letters etc..? Nah. Has anyone ever told you they liked you to your face? Yeah. Have you ever touched an elephant? No. Reading or writing? Writing. Do you have a childhood nickname? Mom called (and sometimes still does lakjdf;alkwe) me “Twinkie.” She gave sweets-oriented nicknames to all her kids. Have you ever had a Moon Pie? UGH they’re gross. I have this faint memory as a kid of a sweetheart babysitter my sisters and I had always offering us banana moon pies as a snack or dessert, idr. I’ve always hated anything banana-flavored. Has your car ever had troubles? N/A What's your birthstone? Amethyst. Would you join the navy? I want nothing to do with anything remotely related to war. What's your favorite board game? Battleship. Do you like chess? I’ve never played it nor even know the rules. If you’ve ever tried drugs or alcohol, what was your reason for first trying it? I was absolutely parched after a long, sweaty walk and was offered it to “try” by my mom without me knowing it was alcohol… the “WAIT NO STOP” from everyone was so quick lmao. It was just hard lemonade, so nothing super serious. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectantly turned up pregnant right this second? I probably would. There is no fucking way I can emotionally handle carrying a baby right now. But I’d feel like absolute shit, even though I’m pro-choice. I just don’t want to picture myself in that situation. Is there a situation where you caved into peer pressure and regretted it? Probably. Although generally, I’m very resilient to peer pressure when it comes to something I really don’t want to do. What is your favorite video game console? Why? PS2, of course. I think the best games came from that era, many ahead of their time. Example, the original Shadow of the Colossus graphics massively pressured the limits of the software, and it still to this day blows me away. Sure, you have some lag in return, but the end result was just magnificent. I seriously, seriously, seriously hope I’m able to play the remake one day. When you lost your virginity, were you sober? I was. As of this minute, what is going through your mind? How I need a change and purpose in life so motherfucking badly. Where’s the last place you went? I was riding around with Mom, doing some errands. Are both of your blood parents still in your life? Yes. When was the last time you went apple picking? Never. Do you have a good relationship with your cousins? We don’t really… have a relationship. We don’t talk, we just kinda “exist” knowing we’re related. What was the last kids movie you saw? I watched some of Hotel Transylvania 3 with my niece and nephew. Do you know anyone who was born in Africa? When I was still in college, there was at least one guy in my class who was. Tutored me in math. Patience of a saint, haha. Have you ever been to an internet cafe? I actually have zero clue what that is. Has the year gone quickly for you so far? I’ve barely discerned 2018-2020, if I’m being honest with you. It’s just a lump of time where I’ve done jack-all. I mean yeah, school fits in there somewhere, but mentally I wasn’t in a wonderful place and haven’t been “happy” for a long time. My mental state has been the same for a few years. How many siblings does your significant other have? N/A Are you one of those people who can drink vodka straight? Oh, I hiiiighly doubt it. I loathe the taste of alcohol. Do you share a middle name with any of your friends? I legitimately have one of the most basic white bitch middle names in America, I know tons. How many pairs of jeans do you own? None. Do you know the name of the pharmacist at your local drug store? One, yes, considering Mom worked there before the cancer and is still in touch with this pharmacist. What flavor is your toothpaste? Mint. Are you sleepy right now? I think I’m permanently sleepy. Do you like crime films and tv shows? Not especially. Are you bitter about anything? Many things. What was the first online account you remember having? Neopets. My older sister helped me set it up when I was somewhere around eight. Do you use emojis? More than I used to. I’m gradually converting from emoticons to emojis, oof. What was the last type of soda you drank? Mountain Dew. Do you remember much from high school? I probably remember too much from high school, if I’m being honest. I remember far too much in far too much detail during the almost four years I dated Jason. Where would you go for the ultimate honeymoon? Probably the Bahamas, mostly for the pink beaches, aha. It would also be an incredible photography opportunity. Do you know anyone who has a strong accent that is hard to understand? My former best friend’s dad was so southern that yes, I could barely understand him whatsoever. If you had to get a tattoo tomorrow, what would you get? If you mean a fresh, new one and not a glow-up on the Mark tribute tat I’ve mentioned five thousand times, a tribute to Teddy featuring his portrait, pawprint, and the Powerwolf lyrics “and we’ll meet where the wild wolves have gone.” I’m going to be picky as a motherfucker about the design itself, though, so realistically it probably wouldn’t be tomorrow since I’d probably commission people to draw in varying styles. Ugh, I need that tattoo gun, my man. What was the last podcast you listened to? Do you listen to it regularly? That would be 4 Peens in a Pod (it’s… not a porn I swear, it’s Fischfuck and the boys lmao). I’m waaaaaaaaaaay behind on it, though. I watch so many different things now that I’m behind on like… everything I watch/listen to. Are you on a first-name basis with your boss? (or last boss if unemployed) I think I was with all of them? What was the last thing you wrote in a Word document? This survey. Because I combine short ones into Big Boys that I usually don’t finish in one go, I save my progress on it. Who do you miss and what do you miss about them? I miss a number of people and would rather not retrospect on them. What were the best and worst costumes you’ve ever worn? *shrug* Do you know anybody who is gay and married? I think so. What did you last take painkillers for? A headache. Are there any hobbies you want to get back into? Ugh. A whole fucking lot. I’ve thought quite a bit recently on how I miss video editing, but I just don’t have the motivation and dedication for that anymore. Have you ever shared a home with a friend? Yes. What’s the craziest or weirdest place you’ve ever slept? Nowhere that strange at all… Probably just like, the floor, but even then with blankets and stuff. What did you have for lunch today and who made it? I haven't had lunch yet. Are you allergic to anything? How did you find out? Pollen is pretty obvious, while serious discoloring and itching let me know I was allergic to silver. Have you ever been on a date with someone you met online? How was it? Yeah, I was visiting her for a couple weeks. It was nice. Who was the last very physically attractive person you saw? In ~real life~, probably some friend on Facebook. Do you know anyone who is deaf? We recently found out actually that my youngest niece is deaf in her left ear due to a massive buildup of fluid in it. I’m so ready to hear about her reaction to hearing normally once it’s taken care of. Has there ever been a person you regret ever being friends with? Probably at some point. “Ever” makes this question difficult. Do you think you have a good understanding on love? Yes. What do you think of your parent(s)? I love them both immensely while acknowledging their flaws. What celebrity do you think should of never become famous? I don’t care enough to think on this honestly haha. Did you ever get into the Twilight saga craze? What about the Harry Potter craze? Neither. What's your opinion about Katy Perry's song "I Kissed a Girl"? It was bold for its time, for sure. I’ve never minded it. Actually since coming out as bi I’ve known that this song has to be included in the recession dances of my wedding if my partner is female lmao. Do you believe in heaven? If so, what's it like? If not, why? I hope there’s some sort of total bliss after death if you’re deserving of such, but I don’t know. I definitely don’t know how I actually picture it. Even if there’s not, well, I’m assuming I just won’t exist anymore, so I wouldn’t be able to care anyway. Sometimes I hope that's the case. What email service do you use for your main (or only) email account? Hotmail. Did you ever believe in the Tooth Fairy? Yeah. I remember there was one time where “she” didn’t trade my tooth for munz and I was so mad lmao. Mom apparently forgot and slipped something under the pillow while I was getting ready for school. How I fell for it, who knows man, kids are wild. How do you feel about Taco Bell? I’m not a Mexican food fan, really, but I do love their cheese (with or without chicken) quite a bit. The cinnamon bite things are bomb as FUCK, too. I’m still mad tilted they took potato products off their menu tho because I used to destroy the fiesta potatoes. How often do you go on to YouTube? I’m like… always on it. Not focusing on it at all times, but something’s in the background. Back when Spongebob Squarepants was famous, were you interested in it? Well of course, man. What's your dream pet? Ugggghhhh a sunset morph ball python, probably. Buuut I’ve seen some over $2k with their rarity. More realistically, I really, really want a Brazilian Black tarantula. And an arctic morph hognose. I want a lot of pets. ;_; Who's been your favorite teacher growing up, and why? God, I have a lot, honestly. All things considered, the answer is probably Miss Tobey, who was my physical science teacher in high school. She’s an extremely close family friend now involved regularly in my family’s lives. She can be… difficult and says shit before thinking, but we love her nevertheless. What's your favorite fairy tale? Fuck outta here if you say Shrek isn’t one. Do you have a favorite pen? Uh, no… I barely ever use pens anyway. Has a child ever asked you a question you found difficult to answer? Yeah; it happens sometimes with my niece and nephew. Name five books you've read in the past year. I think I’ve read the first three Wings of Fire book within the same year, and I’m currently on the forth. Other than those, I started The Testaments by Margaret Atwood, but only got through the prologue I think before my focus shifted onto WoF. I still plan on reading it at some point, though. ^Are any of those books your favorite? No. The prequel to The Testaments, The Handmaid’s Tale, is very high up there, though. Are you a person that enjoys re-reading books? Not at all. Once I read it once, I’m done. There are VERY few books I’ve reread, and most of those were children’s books from when I was little. Do you have a favorite talk show host? Don’t watch any. Which sounds the most refreshing: a hot shower or a cold one? I prefer hot showers unless I seeeeeriously need to cool down. Have you ever made your own soap? No. Can you sleep with socks on? UGH NO. When was the last time you were pissed beyond belief and why? Ummm good question. I don’t know about *that* mad. Maybe when Ashley’s mother-in-law shared a massively homophobic article that condoned conversion therapy on Facebook that resulted in me removing her from my friends and RAGING to my mom about it. That was forever ago, though. Do you have a favorite candle brand? No. What is your opinion on taxidermy? I have… very mixed feelings. If the animal was hunted for sport, then it’s fuckin disgusting; you literally killed an animal with the intention to show off the fact you’re a goddamn murderer. On the other hand, taxidermy of naturally-deceased animals can be educational, and even… artistic sometimes? I don’t know. I can’t really pick one stance over the other. Would you ever want to own a body part in a jar? Actually, yes, particularly of fetal animals (that WERE NOT killed for the sake of displaying), but for the same reasons above, I’m not sure if I would *really* do it. They are incredibly interesting to me, more so than taxidermy probably, but yeah, I still question the morality of it. What is the worst thing you have ever done to your own hair? I don’t think I’ve ever really done a “bad” thing to my hair. What qualities of yours do you think could potentially harm a relationship? I’m very clingy and, in the beginning, very paranoid that you’re going to leave. Have any of your childhood habits carried over into adolescence/adulthood? I had AWFUL separation anxiety from my mom for a very long time as a kid, and I guess that evolved into my extreme inability to handle loss well, maybe. I’d say they’re at least somewhat related. What is the first band that comes to mind when I say 'dark'? Cradle of Filth popped up first. As far as relationships go, what are your biggest deal-breakers? Abuse, arrogance, and distrust probably top the list. Be honest: do looks really matter to you? Nah. It’s nice to be physically attracted to my partner, but it’s not a must. Have you ever done something simply because you were of age? No. Do you think it's worth it to tell someone you had feelings for them when you don't have them anymore? I mean, what’s the situation? Are you hanging out, talking about relationships casually? I’d say it’s fine then if it’s relevant to the conversation. I don’t think it’s worth going out of your way to tell someone you liked them if you don’t anymore, though. Have you ever done something you once thought you'd be too chicken to do? Y’know that ride at fairs where you go up really high on a circular thing with other people and then drop abruptly? That. I screamed like a mf lmao. I had to put a lot of effort into not yelling “SHIIIIIIIIIIIT” lmao. What's a food you love but don't get to eat very often? Stuff involving shrimp, ig. What's your favorite mythical being? Dragons! Have you ever felt a baby kick? I don’t think so, and I don’t want to, considering it’s fucking terrifying to me. I can’t even see a baby move without screaming and wanting to hurl. When is the last time you did something truly fun, and what was it? Who the fuck knows… What is the worst thing you've ever done when you were really angry? Said things I shouldn’t have. Are there any pills you take on a daily basis? If so, what? A lot. I can’t be bothered to go through all of them. At what age do you first remember feeling butterflies in your stomach around someone? I’m not sure. Do you feel that way around anyone now? I don’t think so. What is your main heritage? German or Irish, idr which is more prominent. What is a song that you hate to admit you like? “Bitches” by Hollywood Undead came to me first lmao. What inspires you to get off your bum and do something productive? More than anything, watching inspirational YouTube videos. What part of your body have you had the most problems with in your life? I suppose maybe my ears? I had tubes put in as a kid, I had an absolutely agonizing ear infection once, I had earwax adhered to my eardrum, and they've always been STUPID dry and flaky. Are you watching your weight? Like a hawk, but it doesn’t seem to matter anyway. :^) Have you ever become really good friends with someone you found online? Most of my closest friends I’ve met online. What is the coolest tattoo you've ever seen? You’re asking the wroooong person, lol. I’ve just seen way too many… Have you ever created anything artistic that you're proud of? If so, what? Lots of things; drawings, some writing, photographs, video edits… What do you like on your hotdogs, if you eat hotdogs? Just ketchup and mustard. What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable? Sex. What is a subject you can talk on and on about and not get sick of it? MEERKATS and MARK What is the worst thing someone could do to you emotionally? Tell me I’m weak. Or that my mental illnesses truly do make me unlovable. Just essentially do fucking not make me feel what Jason did. What is the worst thing you've ever done to someone emotionally? Said some extremely mean and potentially scarring shit.

#survey #quiz #questions #questionnaire

2 notes · View notes