#eh i'm bored whatever

[foundfamilywhump]

truly i don't care who thinks it's stupid or boring or "doesn't count" or can't be as intense as what they think of as "real whump" or whatever else, whump with comfort and recovery and caretaker(s) is always going to be my style of whump and i'm gonna have a blast vibing with people who also enjoy that

[beevean]

The way Lenore was written between the two season mystifies me, because I genuinely cannot tell if it was meant to be character development but written awfully, if she was conveniently warped to please her stans, or if she was actually re-railed from her original concept.

The other sisters keep insisting on Lenore being a stupid little girl, a romantic with her head in the clouds, with Carmilla here even recognizing that it's a façade of hers. That Lenore is secretly a selfish cunning being is true, of course, but I'm not sure where the impression of her pretending to be childish comes from.

In S3, there is literally one frame where she acts childish:

Carmilla mocks her for caring about animals, and Lenore just pouts at her like a kid who got offended by her older sis but doesn't know how to respond.

And then she spends the rest of her screentime with Hector, where she acts nothing like this. With him, she's nothing but a suave mommy dommy barely different from Carmilla, always smooth and in control and highly sexual. Can you tell this is the same character?

I think it would have been much more impactful if we could see more of her around the sisters, where she keeps acting like a little kid, her voice unheard because haha silly Lenore, our little girl who thinks she can solve problems with peace and love, and then go back to her gaslighting Hector where she enjoys having utter power. It could make the viewer wonder: which one is her real personality? Is she pretending to be more mature with Hector so that he, at least, can take her seriously, or is she pretending to be a little girl with the sisters to make them comfortable around her, because as I said she is all about comfort and never rocking the boat? Or maybe neither? I like the idea of Lenore being a consummate liar, impossible to trust because she always wears a different mask.

Or even better, she could keep the act with Hector too, to make herself look more trustworthy and totally not like mean #girlboss Carmilla! Laughing and playing around and pouting at Hector's provocations (assuming he still has a personality), looking innocent and almost out of place. So that it would have been much creepier to see that this "sweet little girl" is capable of planning rape and betrayal in advance. This would explain how Carmilla pegs Lenore's façade for what it is: it's how she tricks people, and she has seen it a million times, and maybe she finds it demeaning but hey it gets the job done. Griffith from Berserk was roughly described in the same way, someone who could swing from looking like a goofy kid to a hawk targeting his next prey, someone who could play naked waterfights with someone after dislocating his arm in a fight.

But that's not what we got. Lenore in S3 keeps being a dommy mommy even when she humiliates Hector in front of her sisters, dictating her terms and being very pleased with her work, like someone who is happy to gloat that she is not stupid and she's very much not a kid since she used sex to accomplish her plan and is not afraid of telling everyone, thank you very much. That small introduction ends up being irrelevant.

And then in S4 she swerves into being, effectively, a whiny brat, spending her entire screentime complaining and moping, pestering her pet with dick jokes because "she's bored" and wants to be entertained, complaining some more, crying that Carmilla lied to her which is a very childish conclusion to reach, making a show of how smol and sad she is by hugging her knees and 🥺ing, clinging onto Hector for emotional support, you get the drill. Now she really is a little girl, although I'm not sure I'd call her sweet.

^ this inspired this whole rant lol. can't say i don't understand her tho

(even if you think this is a lie and she was genuinely curious about Hector's work but didn't want to be honest about it: it would still be immature behavior, and another sign of her pride. Much like her snapping at being reminded of the time she resorted to rape and enslavement!)

Of course, by this point, the idea is that this is not Lenore putting a façade of innocence to hide her cunning. She is being fully sincere in her immaturity, because something something she has come to trust the man she raped into slavery and she's no longer playing with his heart although she still pouts when reminded of what she did isn't this the purest love ever <3

So, as I said, it's possible that Lenore in S4 was "re-railed" to what her concept was meant to be. A diplomat who genuinely wants nothing but peace and rejects war and violence, a lonely misunderstood young woman (she was called "princess in mourning" in her concept art), a vampire who combines childishness and intelligence: on paper, she is fascinating. But with how everything was laid out previously, this feels less like re-railing, and more of that convenient woobiefication I keep pointing out. Now Lenore has lost all of her bite, she is literally wasting time doing nothing which aids the perception that she's the "kindest", least evil vampire, she goes to whine to Hector instead of taking advantage of him, and aww isn't she the cutest thing. How can you hate her! She's just a widdle girl who wants to be loved 🥺 isn't she cute when she makes dick jokes and bothers Hector because she misses him 🥺 even though, when you bother to read her lines, it becomes blatant that she did not grow in the slightest, she only became more ineffectual.

Not only Carmilla's comment comes off as one of the infinite instances of "tell don't show", because it's easy to just tell us that Lenore pretends to be innocent and then write her as fetish material for the horny audiences, but it's also one of the infinite instances of S4's cowardice. An abuser acting like a young girl taking advantage of her cutesy looks and demeanor would be a great character, but of course, we have a ship to promote, so Lenore becoming an immature brat out of nowhere is what passes as a heel-face turn here.

I also can't help but think of how Hector too has been similarly miswritten as a "manchild". Hector has childish tendencies too: he sees nothing wrong in resurrecting dead animals to keep as company (which implies all sorts of things about how he sees death and love), and his need for approval and safety overrides his logic. In S2, he is competent, even intelligent to some degree, but naive. But the story eventually flattens him into a genuine spineless idiot who can't see the blatant lies in front of his face, with his intelligence being brought back in one episode only and once again to make the disgruntled fans happy. The story also makes clear that what makes him "a child in a man's body" is, overall, his gentle traits like his love for animals, which is... cynical, at best.

I know there is supposed to be a parallel between Hector and Lenore, as the two black sheeps of their group being looked down on for their "kindness" while they're much more dangerous than assumed. But with how spitefully Hector was written and how sanitized Lenore eventually became, the story is so wildly inconsistent I have to assume the writers don't even know what being childish (or kind for that matter) even means. funnily enough manga hector is a better example of a grown man with childish naiveté :P

anyway they deserved a better writer who doesn't think sexual abuse is the hottest thing actually

[inexplicably-spookified]

mura jumpscare

[notquitedeadpod]

neige in a t-shirt that says 'i'm with stupid' but the arrow points directly up at his face

[no-thanks-bro]

Wish I could sell my digital games 🫥 I don't want tears of the kingdom oops sorryyyy

[artykyn]

I was like “I’m so excited to move somewhere new and do a lot of exploring and traveling!” only to discover that actually I find exploring to be really boring when I’m alone

Like yeah sure I can go on a road trip and see some cool views and interesting places. But if I’m not sharing those memories with someone, then all my memories might as well just be dreams. I want somebody pointing things out to me and saying something funny about it. I wanna point things out to them. Quietly gazing at the ocean is boring alone, but a wholesome relaxing moment if I’m with someone. When something weird happens I want someone to laugh with me. When I’m alone I just go “huh okay” and move on.

At first I thought “maybe I can get a remote job and then pop around living in temporary housing for a few months at a time and explore everywhere!!” but the more I learn about myself, the more I realize I would be soooo bored. Unless I had a partner who also had a remote job and was willing to lead a lifestyle like that. 

[darkdragon768]

I hate this game so much.

I can't do any good sandwiches anymore because my table vanished. It's gone.

When the bread is placed it just falls on the floor where I can't see it. Placing ingredients correctly is impossible to do.

Cool guessing game, sandwich gave me not the effects it promised.

This is so fucking ridiculous. Full of bugs and lags and freezes but it's still published and marked as finished. Minor updates and patches that won't fix shit.

[autistickaitovocaloid]

I do quite like project mirai I'm pretty sure it was the intention but it really does have a very like. Playing with toys vibe. The PSP project divas (esp extend <3) are still my all time favourites though I love the "future" energy those games bring to the table.

[supercantaloupe]

finally got our damn concert program (we leave in less than two days lol.) i'm listed as a soloist on gabriel's oboe which is nice (and as it should be.) but not on the schindler's list

[meliohy]

I feel nostalgic about shimejis. Cute little chibis of your fav characters running or climbing around your screen. Grabbing and throwing them with the mouse. Forgetting to close the program and coming back either to a screen overcrowded with them or a crashed computer

[wysteria-bloom]

↪" you amaze me "

Bg3 x reader

Giving them a surprise kiss

Warnings : suggestive on Halsin's part... Spoilers for bg3 (duh).

Genre : fluff

A/n : I have 367 hours in this game so I believe that I am worthy enough to write for these characters I love so very much. I am extremely open to requests for bg3 please send me all the stuff you want to see! I'm not gonna include minsc and jaehira for obvious reasons.

Characters : halsin, astarion, wyll, gale, gortash, rolan, raphael

▢ astarion

Leans into the kiss almost immediately. Its usually how he responds to any affection coming from you. Rests a gentle hand on your arm as he deepens the kiss with a pleased little smile on his lips.

When you break from the kiss, still has the smile on his lips, his eyes looking down at you softly, " can't get enough of me, darling?" He cooed out teasingly, a giddiness to him that wasn't there a few minutes ago.

You nip his jaw," stop getting cocky. I caught you off-gaurd, admit it."

He gasped in offence," and here I thought my beautiful partner was merely expressing how much they loved me." Shaking his head at you with an exagerrated pout," shame on you."

"... That's a 'yes'." You smirked.

"Oh shut up," pulls you into another kiss full of laughter.

▢ gale

Blinks for a good 5 seconds before finally responding to the kiss in full, hand curling through your hair to cup the back of your head. A wistful sigh blows through his nose as he leans into the kiss more.

When you pull away, he still holds your head. You smile happily at him," Hello, love." You greet cutely.

Sends you a bashful little smile, pressing his forehead to yours," Well... hello to you too."

"Were you surprised?"

"Oh-hoh?" He grinned with amusement," there was a goal behind all this?"

You tilt your head from side to side," eh... I did have one. But I also just wanted to kiss my handsome husband."

Clears his throat, cheeks warming," Oh, well consider me th..thoroughly surprised, then."

▢ wyll

It only takes him a second to respond to your kiss, cupping both sides of your face so gently and rubbing a thumb across your jawline. A small happy hum falls from his lips as he's kissing you.

When pulling away, his lips chase after yours, giving you a final little peck," You amaze me. Everytime." He breathed out, always has something cheesy to say after every kiss but it never fails to make your heart stutter.

You huff," You're impossible to surprise, yknow? You're too smooth."

He laughs," will it make you feel better if I said you gave me butterflies?"

A hum and then a smile you nodded to him," I believe that's substantial. However, you need to pay for your indiscretions with a kiss."

"Whatever will I do?" Wyll leans down, nose pressing against yours," I have no choice but to give in, hm?"

"No choice." You agreed, hands moving to his waist as he cups your face.

He presses his lips to yours excitedly.

▢ gortash

He's doing some paperwork when you give him a little kiss on the cheek. Not reacting at first, he finished his signature before looking up at you, a softness to his eyes," Can I help you?"

You merely give him an innocent smile," just reminding you that I love you."

He blinks for a moment before he hums, a slow grin reaching his lips," I see.." He places a hand to your hip, rubbing it slowly with a thumb," Well, I fear I need another reminder then, my dear."

"Greedy," You cooed out before pressing a proper kiss to his lips.

▢ raphael

Is certainly shocked for a split second. He was only telling you about a recent poem he had read and enjoyed.

He cups the back of your neck with his clawed hand, deepening the kiss with huff of amusement. Before breaking the kiss he nips at your bottom lip with his sharp teeth," It's rude to interrupt."

You hum, pressing another kiss to his jaw," You're too endearing when you talk about your poems." You reply honestly.

"Oh good, I was afraid I was boring you." No, he wasn't. He knew how engaged you got in his little speils. That was endearing.

"You could never." He drags you into another kiss with a lot more flames stoked beneath it.

▢ halsin

A low hum of surprise and then a slow smile reaches his lips. His large hands rest on your waist as he deepens this kiss, feeling heat build between the two of you the more passionate it grows.

When you pull away from eachother there's a trail of saliva left between your lips. His eyes are a lot darker now, a yellow shine to them," is there something you need, my heart?" He questioned with that low tone of his.

"Just you."

Pins you to a nearby tree and kisses your neck," that I'll give you in abundance."

▢ rolan

Was in the middle of complaining to you about how you put a book in the wrong place. He had that cute little frown on his face, the grouchy furrow to his brows and the agitated swish of his tail.

You just couldn't help yourself. Leaning forwards, you caught his lips with yours, making him shut up completely. He stared down at you with wide eyes before he moans a little and leans into the kiss.

His tail curls around your leg, dragging you closer to him as he leaned back against the bookcase behind him.

When you pulled away for a breath, he still had his eyes closed for a good five seconds.

Looks into your eyes for a moment before he cups your jaw," you can't kiss your way through an argument." He huffs out.

"I just did."

"Did you? What if I'm still mad at you?"

You grinned at him," Your tail says otherwise, love."

He scoffed and tried to frown but his lips kept twitching," You're impossible." Pulls you into a more heated kiss, arms wrapping around you protectively.

[beloveds-embrace]

I dunno if I've harassed you yet buuuut,

I just read the newest take on the text and they'll be there guard dogish 141, and just. What if an anxious little bird just walks up to one it the group and just squeezes into the crowd and just.

"ignore me I'm about to lose my shit" or just stands there and gives a small hi cause they're overstimmed or need a break or someone's been creepy and they see that people keep a wide berth from said person or group.

Hi I'm excited I hope anything here made a bit of sense. Also possible reverse 'guard dog' distribution system, the small bird doesn't find a dog. The dog finds a bird.

You aren’t harassing me at all! Please don’t ever feel like that 😭💕 i love, love both scenarios, so I’ll do the second one later as well. Thank you for this wonderful ask!

The dim hum of the pub was comforting- warm light glowing against worn wood, the steady murmur of conversations buzzing around you. It had been your usual spot for a quiet drink after a hard week, but tonight was different, and not in a good way.

Someone had been watching you, and not in the harmless, fleeting way most people did. His gaze lingered too long, his smirk too wide, his attempts to approach you far too persistent even when you refused the drink he’d sent towards you. When you’d brushed him off the third time like that, you could see clearly on his face that he didn’t like that.

Men like him were common, but that just made them all the more dangerous.

The weight of his presence was suffocating, so you’d bolted toward the one corner of the room where you felt the most secure. Them.

You’d seen them here before- an unassuming group at first glance, but the way they carried themselves screamed “don’t mess with us.” Four men with their thighs each bigger than your head at the very least, and tonight, they were your only hope.

Standing up and doing your best to ignore the angry gaze practically boring into you, you approached their table cautiously, feeling several pairs of sharp eyes land on you. Mutton chops tilted his head, pretty boy stood from his seat slightly, brow furrowed. Mohawk’s wide grin faltered, replaced with curiosity, while the last one’s gaze, though obscured by his balaclava, was cold and assessing.

You should probably ask for their names. If they let you sit you with them, that is.

“Uh- so sorry to bother,” you started, voice shaking slightly. “But…there’s this guy…” You didn’t need to finish. Balaclava’s attention shifted subtly, big shoulders tightening as his eyes flicked past you. Mohawk’s grin returned, but this time, even in the dim light, you could tell it was dangerous.

“Where?” Mutton chop asked, his voice steady but just as sharp as his eyes

You subtly nodded toward the man at the bar, who was now visibly trying to act like he wasn’t watching your every move. The second he noticed who you were speaking to, his face drained of color. He turned away, gripping his drink like it might shield him.

Pretty boy snorted. “Well, ain’t that something? Big man suddenly doesn’t have the guts, eh?”

“Stay here.” Balaclava said firmly, standing up with the kind of slow, deliberate movement that made your stomach flip. The other three followed suit, each moving with the kind of quiet unity that could only come from working together for years. Maybe they were a team? You knew there was a military base somewhere nearby, could they be from there?

Still, you obeyed and stayed behind, heart thundering in your chest as they approached the man- not from fear, but from excitement. Ghost leaned in, his imposing frame towering over the guy. Whatever was said was too low for you to hear, but the way your harasser paled, hands shaking as he grabbed his coat and bolted from the pub, told you enough.

When they returned and introduced themselves, Soap clapped you lightly on the back with a bold grin. “Dinnae think he’ll be botherin’ you again, lass.”

Price pulled a chair out for you, right with their table. “Sit. You’re safe here. Anyone who’s got a problem with you’s got a problem with us now.”

You sank into the chair, warmth spreading through your chest. You didn’t know them, not really, but in that moment, you felt like you’d just gained four overprotective, no-nonsense bodyguards. Is this what celebrities felt like? It was amazing.

“Thank you, really,” you repeated, giving them such a grateful, blinding smile. “Again, I’m so sorry for bothering you like that. It was just-“

Gaz shook his head, not letting you finish. “No need to, love. We don’t mind at all. Just enjoy your night now, yeah? No more of pricks like him bothering you.”

And judging by the way Soap was already offering to buy you a drink and Ghost’s subtle but watchful eye, you were honestly more than okay with that.

[squapejuice]

"Hyur are so boring, why would you play a human in a fantasy game?"

Fine. Whatever. You find the idea of playing a human boring. But I'm kind of getting sick of people saying this to me, a hyur enjoyer, sometimes even directly under my own screenshots of my OCs.

Hyur in FFXIV are a *wildly* fascinating take on the "humans in a fantasy setting" that we often see in video games. They're an almost complete subversion of "humans are the dominant culture that everyone assimilates into and also they did a colonialism at some point, which is why their language is The Common One".

Meanwhile, hyur in ffxiv? They're MIGRANTS.

They're NOT the dominant culture. Are they the most numerous population in a lot of places? Sure. Because they have kids out the wazoo, but I digress. Hyur in ffxiv are defined by their adaptability and willingness to assimilate. They're *so* defined by adaptability that there are at least three major historical events throughout the astral and umbral eras called "The Great Hyur Migration". Hyur only arrived in Ishgard after the dragonsong war had started and you'd be hard pressed to find any modern Hyur born and raised in Ishgard who would define themself as anything *other* than Ishgardian. Their names may be slightly different than Ishgardian elezen, but I would theorize that might just come down to class dynamics as while hyuran noble houses exist, they're not common. However in Hingashi they've completely assimilated into eastern Raen culture, as an example. I actually hesitate to find any place we know ingame to be completely dominated by hyur, because in Gridania despite the elementals picking hyur to be padjal the culture seems to be most influenced by wildwood elezen, and in ala mhigo while hyur are the most populous of demographics, the entire culture seems to be a marriage of hellsguard and miqo'te. Ul'dah is clearly highly influenced by lalafell above all, and limsa lominsa is heavily developed by the sea wolf roegadyn. Hyur just kind of fit themselves in and adapt to what everyone around them is doing.

So why is the language spoken by all the peoples in Eorzea the same? Isn't that the hyuran language? Nope! It's pretty explicitly said that the common language is a pidgin tongue that was deliberately developed by merchants and was adopted widespread out of convenience. They even say that Tural took inspiration from this in developing their own (and it's only coincidentally similar enough that your party can understand it with minimal language barrier, funnily enough. That's a hilarious way to handwave 'eh, game mechanics' tbh).

Anyway hyurs are really cool and I really want to see more people appreciating them for the interesting lore they do have and also exploring this concept more. Like making their hyurs naturally predisposed to learning multiple languages for example.

[arklay]

oh shit i just realised i didn't post my modded claire screenshots here... i made a whole thread on cursed bird app lmao but mayhaps i do a lil recolouring of my favourite ones and post them all nice 🥰🥰

[rogueddie]

There are a lot of rumors about Eddie Munson. From his sexuality, to his religion, to him being some sort of supernatural creature.

Steve doesn’t put a lot of merit in most of them. They’re usually just bullshit people make up to entertain themselves with whilst beating down on the weird kid. Steve thinks it’s boring… usually.

He’s seen enough weird things happen around Munson to know that something isn’t right. Something about him is unnatural. And Steve is staying clear out of the way of whatever the hell he is, or whatever the hell he’s messing with.

Unfortunately, his friends haven’t gotten the message.

“Do it at your own house!” Steve complains, though he makes no move to stop them. He’s sure it’s nothing, that it’ll only lead to an annoying clean-up job, but there’s a nagging sense of dread writhing in his gut. “This shit is bull anyway.”

“If it’s bull then what’s the problem?” Tommy counters.

“Because none of you dickheads are going to help clean this shit up!”

“I promise to help you clean up,” Carol says. “There. Problem solved. Right?”

"It's still stupid," Steve mutters, glaring at the janky make-shift pentagram they've made. "And a bad idea."

It's drawn on nine pieces of paper- they wanted to draw it big on the floor, but Steve had but his foot down. He lets them use some of his moms candles as a compromise.

With the lights off, sitting with the two of them in a circle, it suddenly feels too real. Even Carol looks suddenly nervous.

Tommy is the only one still smirking, though Steve is sure that it's forced. His voice shakes a little as he begins reading off the paper he'd torn out a library book. His Latin is clunky.

At first, nothing happens.

Long enough that Carol says, "did you even say it right?"

"Yes, it even has-" Tommy starts.

The candles all blow out, suddenly. The light Steve had left on in the kitchen flicks off too, plunging them into complete darkness.

After a horrible moment, where they're still and silent, Carol yelps.

"Don't grab me, Tommy, that's not funny!"

"I didn't grab you."

"Wh- Steve?"

"No," is all Steve can get out.

"I'm turning the lights on," Tommy says. "This is ridiculous."

Steve listens to his footsteps and, when he sounds like he's almost at the light switch, he yelps.

"Fuck this," he says.

"What the fuck, Tommy!" Carol yells when they both hear him running past them. She's up on her feet immediately, chasing after him.

He wants to scream after them, plead with them to come back, that they shouldn't be abandoning the circle.

But, the same gut instinct that insists he stay where he is, keeps his mouth shut. Everything in his being is telling him that if he leaves, if he speaks first, horrible things will happen to him.

Something tuts, like a parent admonishing a child.

The living room light flicks on, so bright that Steve has to blink a few times to clear away the white spots.

Eddie Munson sits in the space they left empty.

"Someone didn't read the terms and conditions," he snickers.

"What..." Steve pauses, clearing his throat. "What are the, uh... terms and conditions?"

"Oh, they're simple, really. Look," he holds up the page Tommy had read the incantations from, pointing to the little paragraph at the end. "They even translated it to English! But all you need to know, big boy, is that you are A-OK."

"And... Tommy and Carol?"

"Eh, they're fine. Lucky, really. I'm trying to relax up here. I'm only gonna pay them back with a minor curse or two. Nothing lethal."

"Fuck."

"We haven't even got to you yet!" He spins around so hes laying on his belly, resting his chin on his palm. "You didn't technically summon me so you can just tell me to leave... or."

"Or?"

"Deal with no consequence, baby. One wish, whatever you want, free of charge. Well... I'd want your silence about the whole... summoning thing. Let's consider that payment."

He doesn't need his gut or book to warn him that it's a bad idea. Munson could be lying, easily. There could be fine print. It's a bad, very bad idea.

"There's... definitely no consequences? I won't, like, go to hell for this?" Steve finally asks.

"Do some charity work for a week, you'll be fine," he says, waving his hand around. "What do you want, King Steve?"

"Could- could you make someone love me?"

"Oh, ho ho ho! Who's the unlucky lady who said no to you?"

"No, it... it's not like that. I mean, um... my mom."

Munsons smile drops. The temperature drops with it, making a chill run up Steves spine.

"Your mom," he repeats.

"They're busy like, all the time," Steve automatically defends. "And they're barely here so, uh... of course they wouldn't- I mean, it's normal, right? You can't love a stranger or... whatever. It's fine. It's just... I don't know."

"Steve..." Munson pauses.

He groans, throwing his head into his hands, dramatically. He almost immediately flings his head back up, hair flying everywhere, giving Steve wide and pleading eyes.

"I can't make people fall in love or any shit like that. I can make illusions, that's it. Love is, like... way out of my jurisdiction."

"I- I'm ok with an illusion. Like, just one day or something."

"Steve, baby, you're breaking my heart."

"Please?"

"Jesus- ok!" Grumbling, Munson shifts so he's kneeling. "And in return, you won't say shit about any of this. Deal?"

"Deal."

"Great. Ugh. This next part is... weird."

"What do you mean, weird?"

"It's weird, I don't know. Deals about, like, love are sealed with a kiss."

"You're joking."

"Nope, and that's not even the weird part. Now, come on and pucker up, let's get this over with." He gestures for Steve to shuffle closer, waiting until they're sat close enough that their knees almost bump together. "You can still change your mind. Anything at all, Steve. Anything."

"I thought you wanted to get this over with?"

"On your head..."

Munson leans forward, kissing him. It's just a peck, simple and easy. No big deal, right?

Steve feels possessed. It's like someone lit a match in his stomach, leaving him lightheaded and confused. He's not sure how he ends up in Eddie's lap, clutching onto his shoulders, desperately trying to lick into his mouth. He feels so-

He wakes up in his bed, the morning light blinding him.

"What the fuck..." he mutters to himself, grabbing at his throbbing head.

At first, he thinks he's hungover. That he'd just had a weird dream... but he's wearing the same clothes. And, sat on his stomach, is a guitar pic. It's got 'corroded coffin' written on it too- Eddie's band.

"Steve!" He hears his mom call. "Time to get up!"

He scrambles out of bed, dashing down the stairs.

She smiles when she spots him, so bright and warm. She even raises an arm, laughing when he practically throws himself into her side and hugging her tight.

"Morning, sweetheart. Good dreams?"

"Yeah. Yeah, great. But, uh... I feel sick."

"Oh no," she frowns. She puts her hand to his forehead, cooing when she brushes his hair out his face. "Is it your stomach?"

"Yeah. Just... might be better to stay home today. If that's ok?"

"Of course it is. I'm sure we can find something fun to do together, yeah? How about we get a vhs movie, hm?"

"I'd love that."

"Great. Well, if you're feeling up to it, I've made breakfast." She steps away, plating the food she's cooked up. "Oh, did I ever tell you about Paris? It was beautiful, you would have loved it. We should bring you, next time we go."

Steve can't stop smiling. He's sure that his cheeks will be aching by the end of the day.

He'll have to thank Eddie- as soon as he can even think about him without blushing. He'll need to ask if it's normal to still feel... affected, even after the deal is done.

Part of him knows it isn't the deal. Part of him is too curious about how Eddie will react.

[transformers-spike]

I'm in great need of a desperate to please, absolutely lovesick Starscream who will do anything to pleasure the reader. Whatever they want? He's raring to give it.

Goddammit writing his POV always kicks my ass, but here have me attempting to decipher him for the umpteenth time

How dare you forgive him?

After all he’s done; the abductions, the threats, the torture – you still looked upon his visage and refused to give in to ire. “I know you’re a dick, but why do you want to be hated?” you asked him once, dangling your legs from the mezzanine, ignoring the two-wheeler’s fiery gaze boring a hole through his back. “Is your processor malfunctioning?” he asked in return, crossing his arms and ignoring the watchful optics of the Autobots surrounding him. “After all I’ve done, hatred is the best I can hope for.” “Nah, I think it’s deeper than that. I think you’re a sad little man who can’t even fathom genuine empathy.” He would have grabbed your pathetic human frame and threatened to crush you if not for the yellow mech hovering around him looking after his own human pet. Your disregard for your own safety led you to trail behind him on a cycle by cycle basis. “It’s not like we have anything better to do,” you said, jogging to keep up with his wide strides. “Besides, I think you can use the company. I can’t imagine being on your own for so long has done your mental health any favors.” He suddenly stopped in his tracks, causing you to smash into his pede and fall down, clutching at your nose. “Motherfuck-” you hissed. “What makes you think I want your company?” He turned around and watched you wipe the blood from your face, trying not to cringe at the sight. “You are nothing but a useless fleshling.” “There we go again with the avoidant behavior,” you said, grinning like you were in on a private joke. “I guess you really had it bad around the Decepticons, huh.” “Preposterous!” He leaned down to thrust an indignant digit in your chest. “I was the Second in Command, my position was coveted by all. How dare you speak so lightly on matters beyond your comprehension!” “Yeah sure,” you drawled, patting his digit dismissively. “I doubt it was that coveted once Megatron made his big fat return.” Beyond his better judgement he snatched you up and brought you to optic level. You reeled in his grip, gaze flickering between the hard ground and his sneer. Initial fear and panic were replaced with… concern. “Ah. Sorry. I didn’t mean to hit this close to home.” It was his turn to reel back. “I don’t need your apology!” he snarled. “Maybe, but the offer still stands.” You looked up at him, concern softening the corners of your eyes. “Hey, I never hated you. Not even when I should have.” You chuckled. “Maybe you’re right and I really am insane for feeling this way compared to-” you gestured at the military base from across the dilapidated landing strip. “I just… I know how it feels like to be beaten down by everyone, both figuratively and literally.” A second chuckle escaped you, darker than the last. “Hey! Everything okay out there?” Starscream nearly dropped you when the green mech shouted from the entrance, glaring daggers at him. “It’s fine!” you called out, waving at the Autobot reassuringly. He scrutinized Starscream for a while longer. “If he gives you any trouble don’t hesitate to say it!” “Eh, I’ll be fine! He’s all bark no bite!” He let out a bellowing laugh and left, but not without sparing Starscream one final scathing glance. He contemplated you in his servo, watching you uselessly wipe away the blood with your sleeve.

“Are you contemplating asking if I’m okay?” you asked with an infuriating smile. “Absolutely not. Where did you even get such a revolting idea?”

You pointed behind him. “Your wings.”

He looked back and, sure enough, his wings were hanging low. How could the parts he was proudest off betray him so easily?

“You know,” you gingerly added, resting your chin in your hand, “I’ve always loved how expressive they are, especially their sleek design. It’s a shame there are so few seekers around. You’re all so elegant.”

He blinked at you. “I… why of course seekers have the most elegant frames!” He put a proud servo to his chest. “As annoying as you are, at least you can see true beauty when it’s in front of you!” You flashed him a warm smile. It’s been an… odd transition, to say the least. How you seem to have stuck by his side for the better part of six quartexes, ever the loyal turbofox. Things have gotten… heated between the two of you, although not by his initiation, of course. Praises come easy to you, and as much as he would like to reject your prattling… it feels nice to be finally recognized. He has given into your sweet nothings because he has no better options left (nevermind having last interfaced millennia ago), allowing you to worship his spike with an adoration he hasn’t experienced since… frag, he can’t remember. Perhaps the power dynamic is different, having someone so small caress his interface array – someone who cannot hurt him in any way. Safety. Is this what he craves? To let you stroke the sensitive plating of his wings and feel completely at ease? You’re no seeker, you can’t possibly understand their importance even if he explains it. Yet… there is respect in your gestures, carefully caressing them in his alt-mode, before and after the flights you indulge in. It’s a strange appreciation, your kind lacks the EM field to bond without physical touch, but this type of affection is… acceptable. You’re exceedingly easy to overwhelm; throwing your head back when he presses his glossa between your legs, terribly sensitive to the slightest contact, singing sweetly as he pleasures you. You’re small and delicate in his servos, giving off a dainty charm, perhaps similar to that of a seeker if not for your fleshy mesh. Not that it’s of any importance anymore. Going as far as to properly interface with you has been… nerve wracking. Can you come close to understanding what it means to him? To be in such a vulnerable position? Maybe so from the manner in which you submit to him, accepting being completely at his mercy. Mass displacement is, surprisingly enough, useful outside of war; allowing him to embrace you as your hands trail up and down his wings. He never could have imagined humans were so… warm and welcoming. You take him so well for something so small, swallowing up the entirety of his spike in spite of your limits, gazing up at him with a dazed look in your eyes and giving him a thumbs up in tone deaf reassurance. Oh you never learn. When he attempts to kiss you, you allow him to explore at his leisure, snaking your arms around his neck to pull him closer. Your legs tighten around his waist when you’re reaching overload, eagerly grinding against his spike until he’s forced to pin you down and put you in your place. “Don’t rush it,” he purrs, trailing the back of a digit down your cheek. “Consider this my first proper “apology”, so be a dear and accept it.”