#dunno if it's good. dunno if its bad. i normally write horror stuff.

[toonqueen]

Duckvember 2020

--Ponder--

Linking to an old playlist of mine BUT also including why I have these songs on there. Kinda fits the ponder theme okay. I’m trying I’m so behind here *SOB* 

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-BLrUhg7cOKMsu8bGh4CBh5C3EVXCUpy

This is my generic duck feels playlist I use when writing but I often have so many other playlists I use it's insaneeee but this is a nice beginning base until I get a feel for a story to make its own playlist haaaa. 

**Joywave - Bad Dreams*** 

-Ominous feel that some shady end of the world stuff is happening song. One of the main things I put this song to is Magica having a premonition of something bad is going to happen. But she doesn’t have the best rep with powerful magic types and with hero types so she has to make a ragtag team willing to help her. Haaa. Mind you in my headcanon the De Spell family line started by a witch that had a really good future sight so Magica takes it seriously and I GUESS she has to like… stop the world from ending. 

**M83 ft. HAIM - Holes in the Sky***

-Another ominous oh crap bad stuff is happening song wheee. I had an idea that I ended up using in a Duckverse RP of some of the alien hats from Darkwing being a different set of alien hats that were actual powerful witches. The RP I ended up having was for a parody of Hocus Pocus. What I attach this song to is where the hat set grab Magica, Gladstone, and an OC thats a powerful De Spell sibling (that's a whole other story.) That leaves Poe to defeat them save the Earth the usual. My headcanon for Poe is he cannot cast magic but has a wide knowledge of artifacts and spells. Could arm himself with some good magical artifacts. He ALSO would make a ragtag team to try to stop the 3 most powerful magic based people controlled by alien hats. That team would include Fethry and Gyro lol. Notice this song is a lot more postive than Magica’s Bad Dreams song because Poe’s being more positive about getting it done. Magica’s more ‘well we’re going to die anyways might as well TRY” and Poe is ‘ WE’RE GONNA DO THIS AND WE’RE GONNA MAKE IT OMG. Once I get over this crippling depression that I’m useless. Whee.”

**Do You Realize - Ursine Vulpine***

-Vague sad song for sad things. Main reason I had this song is for my Mighty Ducks the Animated Series headcanons for Drake Ducaine. I pretty much kill off all this family and friends in the past. You know, the war, saving stuff. SACRIFICING THEMSELVES SO HE CAN LIVE. His young daughter makes it. Am I not merciful. 

**My Tears are Becoming the Sea - M83***

-Really acidy trippy sad song. Great for fighting elder gods. For my main RPing OC’s on Duckverse this goes with some scenes of their past. Other main thing I use it for is Mighty Ducks the Animated Series I have it for Wildwing’s death.. Haaaa. I kill him off in his 60’s when he has to help save the 2nd Gen team (All the kids of the first team.) Well you know. He’s like the only duck chars I kill off ‘youngish.’ I dunno why most of these story ideas came in high school FRICK. 

**In A Heartbeat - In the House***

-I have loved this song from the second it was in 28 Days Later. I do not have one defined story line plot or character this goes to. I would put it on every song list I had if I felt like I could get away from it. EXCELLENT ATMOSPHERE.

**The Darkest Evening of the Year***

-Another great ominous atmosphere song. I stick this one with Gladstone but don’t put it on my actual Gladstone playlist for being too dark?!? I put it with him finding out what I headcanon the origins of his luck. AND OH BOY. I really want to give the vibe of that scene like some suspense/horror energy let me tell you.

**No Time for Caution - Hans Zimmer***

-Great like, ‘team prepares to fight a boss fight’ type music. Let's do this. We can fight an elder god. LETS GO!!!! But still that bit of dark tone like - hmmm we may not be successful. Ahhhhh.I also think of Tanya from Mighty Ducks working late fixing something or lawd taking care of a teammate gotta find a cure for something. They just gave this woman all the jobs. AGH. 

**Happiness Does Not Wait - Olafur Arnalds***

-A sad yet happy tune. That mix of energy. This one I put with Grandma Duck. In my headcanon all her adult kids have since past but you know all her grandkids visit all the time. It's kinda weird that like, the whole gen in between was wiped out but uh, I have a reason plotted out for that. But you know, Grandma little sad all her kids are gone but sees them in her now adult grandkids ahhh. 

**Low Gravity - Hugo Kant***

-Actually ModMad suggested this one to me when I shared this playlist with them when they made the “Over the Rainbow’ comic. Shared it because it really fit this playlist so I could not  not share ahhh. Anyways. That's one of my top fav comics by Modmad, and actually in an unrelated way inspired some of the backstory for the two main OC’s I RP in Duckverse. Wheeee.

**Everything You Do is a Balloon - Boards of Canada***

-A good ominous ‘the hero has won but at what cost’ energy. This is a song I’ve had for ages and directly put to the abuse I put Drake Ducaine through. I’m so sorry. Weh. I literally have a separate playlist that is Drake Ducaine/Wildwing anxiety cuz I headcanon Wildwing the reincarnate of Drake Ducaine because of COURSE. 

**Goodbye to a World - Small Dust/Porter Robinson Cover***

-I just love music like this. First used this song for Mighty Ducks because the previous life of Drake Ducaine I had be a little duck boy that showed kindness to a Saurian Goddess and she ended up taking the Duck side in whatever fight went down and well the rest is history which will I ever write a story for I dunno. And in the next life as Drake Ducaine the Goddess also reincarnated in a mortal body so they get to work together again yay. This is also one of the main themes I use for my Duck OC’s Felicity and Faustina. In RP land uh they’re from an alternate universe that got all ate up by an elder god and they were the only two survivors cuz some weird luck and magic runs in their family. Their version is a more trippy version here:  https://youtu.be/HzuHAMg1Hng OH WAIT I’M WRONG THEIR MAIN THEME IS A DIFFERENT PORTER ROBINSON SONG HAAA still enjoy. 

**Soldier - Fleurie***

-I use this song several times for Gladstone. Mainly for one story I DO plan to write someday I have so many parts of it done. Anyways he screws up big time and has to fix a problem while he still have luck that works on him, he needs to actually do something to solve the problem and its grueling and takes  a long time and travel around the world and bad stuff just happening to those around him and AHHH. Anyways.  Also a good song for Djinn in new Ducktales theres stories I have reason for his for him let me tell you someday. Ha. 

**Battle Cry - Imagine Dragons***

-A great mello fight song for everything. Just. Some good shit. Heroes making sacrifices. Stuff going down. Hidden powers having to be used getting exposed but you GOTTA SAVE THE WORLD. 

**Elephant Survival - Emancipator***

-A good song for villains to think about their feelings. I loved this song when I came across it. I put it to my headcanon for Negaverse Gladstone. And a little Gladstone in there too. There is a darker mix here: https://youtu.be/59A3k8tpPMI

**Do You Realize - The Flaming Lips***

-This song again but with a slight positive energy?!? Dying and seeing loved ones that passed on kinda vibe. BUT ALSO I abuse reincarnation tropes so bad. This is a good reincarnation trope song. Lawd. 

**Saturn - Sleeping at Last***

-Roll Credits energy to a movie that ended not happy but not sad just the normal in between of life. There is a really good Poe De Spell short story I need to finish that makes me think of this song. I also put it to Drake Ducaine who supposedly dies of old age having saved and rebuilt Puckworld Society. That's a lot of pressure to put on a guy y’all. Also fits my abuse of reincarnate trope abuse. Also for some Djinn x Gene okay like they’re gonna adopt a lot of kids and all those kids are going to write stuff down to their kids like how Djinn writes stuff down and they’re gonna tell stories of their great great great great great grandparents Djinn and Gene forever OKAY.

Anyways, have some feels y'all. 

[terramythos]

TerraMythos 2021 Reading Challenge - Book 2 of 26

Title: Authority (The Southern Reach #2) (2014) - REREAD

Author: Jeff VanderMeer

Genre/Tags: Horror, Science Fiction, Ecological Horror, Cosmic Horror, Mystery, Weird, Third-Person, Unreliable Narrator

Rating: 8/10

Date Began: 1/05/2021

Date Finished: 1/10/2021

John "Control" Rodriguez, a disgraced former spy, is given an opportunity to redeem himself at the Southern Reach, the clandestine organization that oversees the mysterious and horrifying Area X. The director has gone missing following the disastrous "twelfth" expedition in Annihilation. Control is brought in to take over her job and fix the Southern Reach... and perhaps find a way to combat the insidious, paranormal effects of Area X.

But Control soon discovers just how deep Area X's corruption infects the place. Even worse, failures of the past-- both his own and those of the Southern Reach-- return to haunt him in disturbing ways. Badly outmatched within and without, Control will need to do everything he can to save not only the organization, but himself.

The last fragment of video remained in its own category: "Unassigned." Everyone was dead by then, except for an injured Lowry, already halfway back to the border.

Yet for a good twenty seconds the camera flew above the glimmering marsh reeds, the deep blue lakes, the ragged white cusp of the sea, toward the lighthouse.

Dipped and rose, fell again and soared again.

With what seemed like a horrifying enthusiasm.

An all-consuming joy.  

Full review, some spoilers, and content warning(s) under the cut.

Content warnings for the book: some body horror but way toned down compared to Annihilation. Mind control/hypnotic suggestion is still a thing. Non graphic sexual content. Disturbing images. Without spoiling the entire book, there are several scenes that come off as gaslighting, but do have an alternate explanation. As before, a pervasive sense of unreality.  

While Annihilation is a deep dive into the horrors of Area X, Authority takes a step back. It examines the situation from the perspective of the Southern Reach, the organization that oversees the expeditions we got to know so intimately in the last book. Control is a newcomer, so he functions as a natural outsider perspective. However, he's far from naïve due to his past experience in what I have to assume is the CIA (just called "Central" in the book). It's clear from the get-go that the Southern Reach is falling apart with its ancient buildings, circular and helpless theories, dwindling funding, and bizarre office politics. While Annihilation frames the Southern Reach as shady and possibly complicit in Area X's existence, Authority demonstrates the government would be predictably bad at handling an unknowable cosmic horror zone over any length of time.

Though I noted in my Annihilation review that most of the mystery surrounding Area X remains just that, Authority casually drops two major revelations in the first few chapters. First is... it's definitely aliens, right? Like, that's the only explanation that tracks-- why everything about the place is anathema to humanity, why it's impossible for characters to fully understand it, why mimicry is such a major aspect, etc. If you didn't suspect this already, it explains a lot. In particular, the "colonization" terminology and imagery in Annihilation hits different in that context. I have a lot of feelings about how this series approaches the extraterrestrial, but I'll save that for my Acceptance review.

The second reveal is that Control is taking over for the former director of the Southern Reach, who is MIA following Annihilation's "twelfth" expedition. Who is the director? The psychologist-- the pseudo antagonist of the last book, who we know got Super Killed Off. Turns out she's important and probably not actually evil? The biologist is also inexplicably back, but something is off about her, and she insists on being called Ghost Bird now. Did the biologist truly return (counter to the ending of the last book) or is this one of the shells Area X sometimes spits back out into the real world? If she's the latter, Ghost Bird seems to have much more personality and self awareness than the others. It is interesting to consider an entity of Area X would willingly name herself.

So, Authority is a weird book. The horror element is still present, but toned down. Instead, there's a lot of focus on the new character Control, his past, and the workings of the Southern Reach. In some ways this is refreshing. Annihilation (and the finale Acceptance) are so deeply entwined with Area X it's hard to see what "normal" looks like, and Authority brings that perspective. Relatively speaking. Second, and this is a spoiler, much of that normalcy is a facade. Control is basically mind controlled (heh) by a faction in Central, and is unaware of it for most of the book. It comes across in little ways, like the anachronistic storytelling and Control's confusion/disorientation at times.

We also learn that Area X doesn't just contaminate things inside it, but things outside it as well... and it's been doing this for some time. As a result, there's always a sense of Area X lurking in the periphery, manifesting in strange and unexpected ways. Something I like is the background chatter Control overhears being lines from Annihilation, which he isn't aware of, but the reader sure is.

I've read this book a few times, and while there are things I really like about it, it's probably my least favorite of the trilogy. I think the slower pacing and different narrative approach have merits, but just aren't as interesting to me as the rest of the series. It's noteworthy that my favorite bits in Authority are the disturbing video of the first expedition and the sudden End of Evangelion-esque return of Area X near the end-- not the espionage and philosophical tangents that comprise most of the book.  There are several ideas that seem interesting but don't go anywhere, and those feel like a waste of space. I think Authority could be pared down to half its page count and still get across the same feelings and general concept.

Control is also not the most interesting protagonist, especially compared to previous and later characters. He's not terrible, but he spends most of his time just thinking in circles and observing mundane office politics. While this is fine at first it starts to drag as the story goes on. As I said, a lot of tangents go nowhere, and there's not much going on beyond those until well over halfway into the book. Control does have a hidden tragic backstory, and it's interesting enough, but it barely factors into the overarching Area X storyline outside some symbolic comparisons. He feels out of place, perhaps intentionally.

I do like the dry humor and observations Control brings and how they contrast with the intense tone of Annihilation. I can also see the appeal of having a more ordinary character, if only to bring context to the extraordinary. But the problem is Control isn't ordinary. He's the youngest member of a dynasty of professional spies! Yet somehow I just don't find him exciting compared to an antisocial biologist. I dunno. Ultimately Control is a pawn in the story, used and manipulated by other people, and (spoilers) this doesn't change in Acceptance.

I had similar dilemmas with VanderMeer's Ambergris books, particularly book two, so perhaps it's a fact about his writing. When it's good it's GOOD, but sometimes the things I like get lost in rambling narrative fluff. The question is whether getting through the less interesting parts is worth it for the really good parts. With The Southern Reach trilogy, I'd argue the latter. I have no issues with the style or pacing in Annihilation or Acceptance, and the overarching story is fascinating.

I've mentioned many times before that I usually struggle with book twos in trilogies, and this one isn't an exception. However, I do appreciate what Authority is going for on a meta and lore level when viewing the series as a whole. It does establish a lot of things that either explain earlier stuff or pay off later; it just takes a while to get to them. The context of everything else bumps this to an 8.   

[iatheia]

EDA reviews Part 6 - books 47-55

Previous part 1, 2, 3, 4 & 5

47) The Slow Empire - Uh, couldn't really follow this one at all. There are books when the first person narration works, but not here - too many jumps in setting, too little connective tissue, most of it told from the POV of a person who is barely connected to the protagonists? And that's even before they started repeating chunks of text wholesale between various parts - and I couldn't figure out if it was intended, or if it is the ebook was acting out on me. More than half way through the book, I still couldn't entirely tell what the story is supposed to be about, or if the plot has even started yet. Even having finished it, I find myself somewhat aghast. There are a few glimpses of something interesting, but for the life of me, I can't figure out what. 4/10

48) Dark Progeny - Also not really feeling it. It's not a bad story, but I do rather prefer a Doctor Who story to actually feature the Doctor and the companions front and center, whether they are POV characters or not. Here, though, they are barely in it - it's even more egregious than the previous one in actually giving the supposed protagonists stuff to do, and even on rare occasions we do switch back to them, it is all pretty generic. Anji developing telepathic abilities and the Doctor trying to calm her down all the while Fitz is freaking out in the background? Yes, please, more of that. Following around 20 interchangeable OCs that have nothing to do with the trio? No thank you. 6/10.

49) The City of the Dead - If you are invoking magic in a sci-fi universe, you need to be able to handwave it. It doesn't need to be awfully complex, "something something aliens, something something energy" is usually enough, but without it, you can't just throw magic about willy nilly. There are rules.

There are moments when it is a beautiful story, evoking a lot of dream-like wonder, and if it managed to remain a hazy dream, it probably would have been better for it. At the same time there is something very uncomfortably cynical about it, to the degree it left a bad taste in my mouth. There is a narrow line between not shying away from the ugliness of the world and deliberately making something ugly just for the sake of it, and often it felt like it was leaning towards the latter. Dunno, I started out wanting to like it, and feeling rather conflicted about it, but by the end became utterly indifferent. 7/10

50) Grimm Reality - Pure crack. Mind Robber wishes it could be as hilarious and off the wall as this story is. It throws every cliche fairy tale narrative device in the book at the characters and expects them to take it with the straight face, all the while realizing that the rules of the world are completely bonkers. And it manages to sustain this energy throughout, which is a no small feat. It's actually pretty exhausting by the end of it. Fairy tales stories do not belong to a lengthy literary genre, and even taking time deconstructing them, at 95K words becomes it becomes just too much - figuratively, and, on occasion, literally. Still, pretty great, I wish more books had its energy 9/10.

51) The Adventuress of Henrietta Street - *sigh*. My expectations were pretty low to begin with, and I still am somehow disappointed. Credit where credit's due - it is probably most coherent of the books from Miles. And at least it's better than Interference. That's really not saying much, though.

Honestly, if you've read any story about prostitutes, murder, satanic sex rituals bordering on blatant pornography, eastern culture and "mysticism of female sex" used for fetish fuel, written by a dude who clearly gets off on all of this - you've read all of them. There is really nothing revolutionary or compelling about it. On the list of "plots I never want to see in Doctor Who", they are definitely up there. And the Doctor is dying again, because it wouldn't be Miles's book without it. And he's, uh... living in a brothel, trying to marry someone, in order to, uh..... ritualistically tie himself to Earth, for, reasons? Did I read that right? After over 100 years of living on Earth and wanting to do nothing else than seeing the back of it, right. And writing books not quite about sex but definitely about sex. Because that's the thing the Doctor apparently does now. Self insert what self insert. And Fitz and Anji are just... there. On an occasion. All of it exposed on in a dull faux academic style without a shred of characterization, all the while absolutely nothing of note is happening, despite being a singularly longest EDA.

Just, if you hate the characters so much. If you don't understand what makes them tick to this degree. If you don't even care to learn. If you consider any established emotions they should have about the plot you are putting them through beneath you. Why are you writing in a shared universe to begin with? 2/10

(I did have an unintentional moment of hilarity with it, though. There is a character that is referred to as Lord ______, as if his name is censored. TTS would always pronounce it as Lord Underbarunderbarunderbar. Always gave me a chuckle).

52) Mad Dogs and Englishmen - A hilarious story, a very easy read, flowing from scene to scene. There are several occasions of fridge horror treated with levity that I would have rather have avoided. Plus, it is as incestuous as a book about books can get, and yet.... It is just absurd enough to work.

Plus, the whole, “His books are full of black magic, mind control...and perversion - moral and ethical and sexual. He is polluting the atmosphere of our group”, “What’s next? Rewrite War and Peace so it’s about guinea pigs?” - Oh, the shade. It is a good book in its own right, but just for this alone, 10/10

53) Hope - It's a pretty average book. Not outstanding, not horrible. Would have made a decent episode, all things considered, in a bread and butter sort of way. It does have some great ideas - the refuge of humanity, the conflict between Anji and the Doctor finally coming to light - not quite the type of conflict I was hoping for, though. If only it had a bit more nuisance, without neatly delineated black and white, if the antagonist didn't end up being a mustache twirling villain, if the Doctor didn't end up strong-arming everyone in a much more macho manner than he normally goes for (with a rather clunky dialogue). It had potential, even if it didn't end up being realized in full. 8/10

54) Anachrophobia - Very meh. The set up was fairly contrived, it never made me care about any of the characters, including whatever the hell the Doctor and co were doing, not to mention any of the secondary characters. Not terribly engaging, after a point I was mostly flipping through it. There is some big conflict brought up at 95% mark, and it is resolved in just couple of pages via a deus ex machina and a paradox. Overall, I might have said that I would have liked it better if I was in a mood for existential horror, but I took a break in the middle to listen to the Lease of Life - and it actually touches upon several similar themes, but with and outstanding character drama and much more graceful execution, which made this book look even more poor in comparison. 5/10

55) Trading Futures - I will give the author all the points for keeping an eye on the future. Perhaps, in 2002, predicting tablets being used as menus in fancy restaurants wasn’t that big of a reach, but I absolutely had a spit take when TTS has read to me something about “eye-phones”. There are some modestly clever moments throughout the book. Too bad that the rest of it is a complete rubbish. Not terribly original, either - a lot of ideas are copied directly from other books and other franchises. Reasonably entertaining, all things considered, but in a much more slapstick sort of way than was probably intended. 7/10

Overall impressions so far - This batch is, for the most part, fine. Some stories are worst than others, some better. With one exception, nothing horrendous, but nothing to write home about, either. They are, for the most part, serviceable. Individually, they have decent enough plots. But. There is very little character work. They can generally be read in any order, or dropped entirely, and you wouldn’t miss anything. The Doctor is mostly coasting from the excellent streak in the last batch, always in a spot light. I am starting to tire of the whole amnesia arc, though - it was good, but it ran its course, and at this point, with everything functionally back to norm, with barely a stray mention of it here and there, we are starting to be overdue for some semblance of resolution of all that. Henrietta Street is entirely a step in the wrong direction - not only it does nothing worthwhile for the characters, it’s just getting unnecessarily further into the weedworks, adding yet another plot thread that is forced on other writers to carry (they mention it occasionally, but it’s not like there is much to build upon) - rather viciously reminding of the previous mess of an ark “don’t you dare to think that it is over”. And I am so over it. Just, move on.

The companions fare rather worse. They are decent enough, they participate in action, in each book, they are mostly staying in character, with a handful of neat moments here and there (in a blink and you’ll miss it sort of way, though), they aren’t written off as an unnecessary burden to carry, which is an improvement. There is nothing meaty given to them though - they ask the necessary questions, do the things required of them, and generally stay out of the way when they are not needed. I guess Anji has at least some character driven moments, even though most of them are reduced to “I miss my dead boyfriend”. Which is... fine, we’ve all lost people, we all mourn them in our own way, but it has been 14 books since her introduction, and she is leaving in another 10. To have her character reduced to just that bit from her first book, with barely anything else to offer.... Plus, all the while, she rarely felt like she integrated into the team - because she is constantly eying her exit and returning to normality (even though she always decides to stay just a little while longer due to circumstances), it’s like from the very beginning she had one foot out of the door.

But while Anji is a bit of a one trick pony, at least she has that much. Poor Fitz gets absolutely nothing to do. The last meaningful book that addressed his character in any way was all the way back around book #42-43, and even that was just catching up on plot after his prolonged absence. He’s been essentially frozen since early 30s books. He is generally a fun character to have around, and does good supporting work, but can he please get something more impactful any time soon? Heck, by this point I’ll even take the recurrence of “finding a new love interest number 20 who will inevitably die by the end of the book” - it has been overdone, and it is certainly not a very exciting plot, not to mention reductive, but at least it’d be something. Though, I guess only one companion is allowed to carry that staple at the time, and right now Anji is it, two dead lovers is just an overkill.

And it is an absolute shame - especially when considering that on the other side, Big Finish was in the middle of streak of some of the best stories. Over the same time that these novels were published, we had audios such as Project Twilight, Eye of the Scorpion, Colditz, One Doctor, Chimes of Midnight, Seasons of Fear, which were full of character.

[purplesurveys]

1024

What would you say is your favorite food? Sushi. < Ahhh, this is a good one. My favorite is down to a tie: it’s either chicken curry or burgers.

What color eyes does the person you like / love have? Are they pretty? Dark brown. I’m not too sure what the second question is referring to but yeah, she and her eyes are both pretty.

What was the first television show you were obsessed with? Hi-5, omg. That show was my life in preschool and I always watched the 12 NN replay as soon as I got back home from school, back when I was still on a half-day sched. I was so hooked I remember having legit tantrums before starting Grade 1 because grade school meant full days in school and thus having to miss out on the show entirely.

Do you like Mexican food or any other foreign foods? For sure. All my favorites are Asian (Indian, Japanese, Indonesian, Chinese, etc.) but I also enjoy Italian, Mexican, Greek etc cuisines. I generally haven’t tried African cuisines but I really, really want to.

What color is the keyboard you are currently using? The keys are black with white lettering.

Do you own any of those ‘chunky’ and cute rings? Nope, not my style.

What are you planning on eating for dinner tonight if you haven’t already? I saw my dad cooking up something deep-fried; it was like his own version of katsu or something, or maybe it’s fish fillet? I’m not too sure what it is yet but I’m excited and will probably eat lots of it as I skipped all my meals and have only been running on coffee and vape all day - not good.

Do you own an iPod or MP3 player? If so, when did you get it? Technically I still do. Haven’t used it since high school. I got it when I was 10 back in ‘08; I was envious of the kids in school who had iPods, so I asked my dad to buy me one even though I wasn’t super into music at the time. Not the best kid in the world.

When was the last time someone took your picture? Last Saturday when my package came. Apparently online deliveries now require your photo to be taken upon receiving your package and I think it’s for the seller to keep track of their transactions. I’m not a big fan of the new procedure, but it’s whatevs.

Would you rather write a report or type it on a computer? Type. 

What color was the last jacket or hoodie you wore? Gray.

Do you receive more compliments or insults on a daily basis? Neither, really. I haven’t been talking to people a lot; and when I do it’s for work, where I receive neither compliments nor insults.

Who is the lead actress / actor from your absolute favorite movie? Audrey Hepburn and Albert Finney, or Matt Damon and Ben Affleck.

Can you recite the alphabet backward? [continued from last night] Slowly, but I’m sure I can finish it.

Do you eat chili when you get a hotdog, or do you like it plain? We don’t do hotdogs with chili here. I generally don’t see chili much where I live and I wouldn’t call it a common dish.

Would you say it’s easy for people to make you smile or laugh? At first I thought it was, but I’m slowly realizing that it isn’t.

What would you say is your favorite cereal, if you even like it? Cookie Crisp is the only one I like. I don’t have cereal often.

When was the last time you went on vacation? Where was it? It was a quick weekend getaway to Tagaytay and then Cavite, if it counts.

How many states have you been to in your lifetime? Zero.

Do you and your friends normally say you love one another? Yep, especially with Andi and Angela.

Have you ever been an outcast at your school or anywhere else? I was definitely one in early grade school, and again in Grade 6 when both my closest friends migrated in a span of six months, and I spent nearly all my lunch periods alone. Looking back on it, I’m really glad I powered through and made it here because I truly wasn’t happy at the time.

Do you own any dresses? If so, what colors are they? I have lots of sundresses and little black dresses because I was into those for a very long time at one point. Some of them are black, obviously, but I also have dresses in blue, maroon, and olive.

Would you say you drink more pop / soda than you should? I never drink soda as I’ve always felt like I spend more time complaining about how drinking it feels like burning my tongue and throat than actually enjoying it.

Would you rather have orange juice or milk with your breakfast? Water.

How many different colors has your bedroom been painted? Just one. The walls have been white ever since we moved here 12 years ago.

Do you cuss? If so, do you ever cuss in front of your parents? I’ll slip in front of them sometimes but I never get in trouble for it anymore.

Would you ever tell your mom about the things you’ve done sexually? Our humor together can be raunchy sometimes but I don’t think I’d ever do this. I dunno if she wants to hear I’ve had sex with a girl either.

Is there anyone out there who can make you cry very easily? Yes.

What was the worst news you’ve heard this entire week? *In the last week, hearing about the typhoon’s effects in other cities didn’t feel good. This entire country is literally only getting by with donations from the private sector because the government isn’t doing shit for cities and families who got severely affected by the typhoon; it’s almost depressing to hear and read about.

Have you ever been in a car wreck? I’ve been in minor car accidents but it would be too much to call any of them car wrecks. They had all just been tiny bumps or thuds.

Do you have your ears pierced? If not, what do you have pierced? Yes, my mom had my earlobes pierced when I was an infant. I don’t plan on getting any more new ones as I’m not really into piercings.

Has anyone ever told you that they think you have ADHD? Nope.

What is your biggest pet peeve? When people reach out first via text/IM then even if I get back to them in 5–10 seconds, it takes them a long time to get back to me. It’s especially annoying if they classify it as urgent, I drop everything to reply quickly, then they end up disappearing. Like why?

Do a lot of people understand you completely? Who does exactly? No, I like keeping a wall up. 

Would you say you’re really good at cooking and baking things? Haha no. But it’s something I want to be skilled in, definitely. I’d love to be able to make the food I usually just thirst over on the internet. I’m taking baby steps, like figuring out how to make certain sandwiches, but I have a long way to go before I can consider myself any good.

How is the weather outside right this second? It’s been a little cloudy this morning but it might start to get fair seeing how I’m beginning to see the sky turn blue. I’m just hoping there won’t be too much sun, period.

Do you have a lot of trees around your house? What about buildings? No buildings as I live in a gated village. We have a number of trees around, but I wouldn’t call it ‘a lot.’

Would you say either one of your parents are 'pack-rats?’ No. I have that title, and I believe I inherited it from my great-grandmother who was a bit of a pack rat herself, as I’ve been told.

Have you ever disowned anyone in your family? For what reasons? Kinda. I don’t associate with one of my uncles because he has a terrible drinking issue that he never got to permanently fix. Whenever I see him at family gatherings he just smells like stale gin or whatever it is he drinks, and it just ruins the essence of family reunions for me. As recent as Christmas Day last year he drove drunk and crashed into a car with an entire family, but as always his ass got lucky because 1) no one in the family got hurt, and 2) said family let go of the lawsuit they were planning to file against him.

Have you ever seen That 70’s Show? Do you watch it regularly? I tried watching the first episode but genuinely could not find it entertaining for the life of me. Sorry, Mila :(

If you could choose, what decade would you rather live in? I never really think about revisiting decades - they’re already behind, so what’s the point? As bad as the 2020s have been looking, I’m okay with staying here.

How often would you say you get sick? Once a year at most.

Is there anyone out there who has hurt you so much, you wish they’d die? I used to wish they would die, but I don’t feel that way anymore.

Has anyone ever called you a socio-path before? I don’t think so.

When was the last time you watched a movie in theaters? December.

Have you ever moved to a completely different state before? We’ve moved to different regions before.

Do you mind it when surveys ask you really personal questions? No. Isn’t that part of the point of surveys?

When was the last time you told someone you love them? Thursday or Friday I think, when Andi said it to me first and I said it back. I wasn’t having a good day and they were just looking out.

Which one would you like more: kiss on cheek / kiss on neck? Depends on my mood. Right now a kiss on the cheek sounds nice.

Does it bother you when people steal your stuff on MySpace? This never happened to me because I had Myspace for such a short time and I never caught it at its peak. Also, how do people steal your stuff over there? That’s pretty intriguing lmao

Do you have freckles? Do you like / dislike them? I don’t have any.

Who would you say is the best actor / or actress in your opinion? My biased ass would rally for Kate Winslet all the way, but some other great ones for me are Toni Collette, Emma Stone, Jodie Foster, and Natalie Portman.

How many times have you been drunk in your life? Many.

What would you do if the last person you kissed said they hated you? Be confused and ask them to give me a few concrete reasons. I don’t think too highly of myself, but I know I’ve never done anything to make me deserving of hate, especially with regard to us.

Do you ever think you might be pregnant? No, it has never been a worry of mine.

When was the last time you acted really immature? The weekend.

Do you enjoy watching comedies or horror movies more? Horror. I never watch comedies and the only subtype of it that I watch is romcom.

As a child, did you ever have an imaginary friend? Yeah but it lasted all of five minutes until I got bored with the concept.

Does anyone call you baby? Who would that be? No.

Can you rely on one or more people to take up for you? I have no idea what take up means. If this also means ‘stand up for me,’ then yeah I can.

[rational-mastermind]

A/N: Hey!! Everyone wants more Quinnvoyant right? Right?? Well too bad, it’s all I have. And an au! Soulmate au where if you write on yourself, it’ll show up on your Soulmate.

--

  Everyone knew that if you wrote on yourself, it would appear on your soulmate as well. And Chris Quinn was no exception to this. Though, for a long time, there was only cute things like drawings of cats and rainbows and stars. Cute poems. Reminders. It was fine enough when he was a kid but as he got older it was just embarrassing. So he would wear long sleeves and hide the writing as best as he could.

   Sometimes he would talk with her, but she was too shy to reveal where she lived or who she was. Which kind of annoyed him. Wasn’t the whole point supposed to be that they would meet?

   When they got to high school, they talked less. Life got busy for her. Life was busy enough for him as well. Sometimes they would check in. Sometimes it would be reminders of homework assignments, or notes in class. Just kind of easily forgetting the other can see what they wrote.

   Then one day, his skin started getting covered in words, very quickly. Bright red marker showed up all over his arms and hands and it crawled all over his body. The same words over and over and over.

   “FREAK”

   “PSYCHO”

   “CREEP”

   “KILL ME”

   None too surprisingly, the only place she didn’t write was on her right arm. She was too busy writing, after all.

   Chris found a nearby ballpoint pen and began writing.

   “Et tu?”

   The scribbling suddenly stopped. For a moment he was worried. But then the ink began running off. It looked wet and began to run down his arms.

   Tears.

   After watching it a moment he began writing himself.

   “What happened?”

   “Bullies.” was the eventual reply.

   “Why?”

   “Cause it’s true.”

   “Same.”

   “What do you mean?”

   Chris sighed. He knew he wasn’t like other kids. They would all avoid him, be afraid of him, or talk about him weird just cause he talked about blood and death and demons and stuff that went bump in the night. He wasn’t gothic. Not by a long shot. He just...liked gore. He liked pain. He once got into a fight. One of the kids had a knife.

   He couldn’t stop giggling.

   There was something so...so thrilling, when he saw the red.

   The voices in his head only encouraged it.

   “I’m a psychopath.” he wrote.

   “I don’t think you are.”

   “That makes one of us.”

   “Well what makes you so weird?”

   “I… hear voices… And… I see things.”

   “Really?”

   “Yeah. But I’m told it’s not-”

   “Me too.”

   Chris stared at the two simple words. Somehow, it utterly stumped him. He felt...weird. He wasn’t sure why though. But he wasn’t entirely opposed to it.

   “What kind of things do you see?” he asked.

   “It’s hard to describe. Sometimes it’s people. Sometimes it’s just screaming. Or loud talking. Sometimes it’s colors and random pictures. What about you?”

   “More about dogs and demons and the end of the world and shit.”

   The rest of the writing on his body started to disappear. She was wiping it off.

   “Can we switch brains?”

   “Yeah, yours sounds more fun.” he chuckled to himself. After a moment’s thought he ventured forth to ask. “So what do you imagine I’m like?”

   “I don’t know. When I try to read you I get this weird image of something dirty and gritty like a horror movie. But at the same time, I also get this...warmth.”

   “Warmth?”

   “Like a towel out of the dryer. It’s warm and soft and it feels like home. It’s funny... Reading your words…”

   Chris felt a bizarre fuzziness grab hold of his brain. The world seemed to darken around him as she continued to write.

   “I can almost see you

   Christopher Quinn”

   Suddenly Chris felt very uneasy and quickly began rinsing off their conversation and scrub the words away. An unsettling chill surrounded him. It was weird. It was creepy. It was...sexy?

   Chris then proceeded to dunk his head under the sink and run cold water over him as well.

   They stopped talking after that.

   Chris got into writing. Finished high school and began making his living.

   Then the asylum.

   Then the Shadow.

   Then the Ministry.

   Chris went through so much hell. Of course it had its positives. There was Trilby and kicking demon ass. A good use of his psychotic tendencies. Making the world safe from the Shadow and keeping magic a secret. The people around the Ministry weren’t too bad. Yarrow was a bit...boring. But Jim was fun to mess with. And Claire was fun. There was always something to do, even if that something normally made Trilby roll his eyes.

   Then one day, well… It was bound to happen.

   Trilby was going to be out of action for a while. A mix up with a vampire left him incapable of going on assignments with Chris. But anyone who ever called Chris a “loose cannon” would recommend that he got someone to tag along in place of Trilby. Someone responsible and level-headed.

   Well who better than the absent-minded psychic he was pounding in the off hours?

   Yeah they were knocking boots. Nothing to get too attached over. It’s not like Chris got to know her life story or anything. Just letting off a bit of steam whenever they could hook up. All he knew was that she was very very much a psychic. Something he found interesting and she found best kept swept under the rug, much to his own disappointment.

   At first she seemed hesitant to go on a mission with him, but after some convincing, and a lot of unusual head shaking and slicing motions from Trilby behind her, she finally agreed.

   It was a simple mission. Done and over in a day. Of course it was the traveling that took the longest. It was on the farthest end of Ireland, naturally. It had some cultists and brainwashing and something to do with summoning a pagan deity. Claire was a natural and it was actually kind of fun getting to do work stuff with her.

   They were traveling back and Claire was already writing up their required report on a notepad. Chris couldn’t help but notice the way she gnawed on a pencil as she tried to focus. The way her fingers drummed through the air like she was at the computer back at HQ, if not fiddling with her large, round glasses. The way the air around her became still and focused as she accidentally projected her feelings about them. Chris could practically hear the gears grinding away in her brain as she tried to recall every needed detail.

   He chuckled to himself and it instantly snapped the tension in the air as her brain derailed.

   “What? What’s funny?” she asked, looking up.

   “Nothing. Just.. I dunno.” he shrugged. “You’re so focused.”

   “Well… I mean..” she shrugged as well. “It gets kinda hard to report faithfully.”

   “Eh those pricks in the higher-ups always find flaws in our reports. No matter what.” Chris rolled his eyes.

   “Hm. True.” Claire sighed. “But it’s not just them. You go looking through so many different minds, so many different vibes and lives it’s kinda easy to forget what’s happening in the real world. You know?”

   “Well.. No. I wouldn’t.” Chris glanced back at her.

   “Oh.. yeah, I guess you wouldn’t.”

   Chris chuckled again.

   “Hey by the way, you were pretty great back there.”

   “Hmm.. I wouldn’t say that.” Claire shrugged.

   “You kidding me? The way you fucked with that one-”

   “Ummm.” Claire interrupted and Chris noticed she looked horribly uncomfortable as she fidgeted with her glasses more. “If.. If it’s all the same Chris.. Can we not talk about...that?”

   “Oh.. Right. Sorry. Forget that makes you uneasy.”

   “Just…something drilled into me, I guess.”

   There was a moment of silence. Then Chris spoke up.

   “Hey um.. Can I...ask something?”

   “If you wanna know if I can predict the future, the answer is no.” Claire rolled her eyes.

   “Damn.” Chris clicked his tongue in disappointment. “....Did you always hate your powers?”

   “Mm..” Claire was quiet for a moment before she shrugged and looked out the window of the car. “What was there to like?”

   “Um, cause it’s fucking psychic powers.”

   “Yeah, exactly.” she sighed. “They always got me in trouble.. It.. Creeps a lot of people out.”

   “Come on. It couldn’t have always been that bad-”

   “No. It was.” Claire growled, her voice taking on a tone akin to earlier that day, but somehow lacking the same venom behind it. “It was always that bad. It was awful. You’ve no idea.”

   “...Well… Like what?”

   “....Like earlier.” Claire shrugged. “But.. By accident. I would...hurt them.. And scare them.”

   Chris frowned. Claire was normally so bubbly, happy, a bit forgetful, but chipper despite the depressing and horrific nightmare that their livelihood was. He hated seeing her this downtrodden. It was wrong. Like on a fundamental scale, this was just wrong.

   “...Did.. Something traumatic happen?” he asked. “Something that made you hate it so much?”

   Claire gave a dry chuckle before replying. “I wouldn’t say...traumatic but.. Well.. It did drive a wedge between me and some really important people.”

   “Was there a guy?”

   “....Yeah…”

   Chris felt something grip him. A sudden kind of deep-rooted anger. The kind akin to staring down a vampire or some other unholy abomination. Not counting Trilby, of course.

   “Who-”

   “Should get some gas. Before the ferry.”

   Chris sighed but found a station and pulled over. Clearly she didn’t wanna keep talking. While he was filling up, she went inside to use the bathroom.

   “Look over the report. Jot down anything I missed, got it?”

   “Yeah..”

    Chris felt crummy and stupid and angry. Claire was a great person! Why would anyone hate her for having psychic powers? Okay yeah so she kind of really mentally fucked with that one guy. And yeah okay so maybe she kinda caused another to have an aneurysm. Yeah sure that might’ve been a more common problem when she was a kid and yeah it might’ve been like Stephen King’s Fury, but so?

   And it’s not like Chris would’ve hurt this guy…. Much.

   He growled and kicked a tire before getting back in the car. He sighed and leaned against the wheel, waiting for Claire to return. That was when he noticed Claire’s notepad left laying on the space between their seats. Oh right.. Reporting.

   Chris sighed and grabbed it. He looked over the notes. Everything seemed in order. She left off at the part where cultists were about to start sacrificing the local children but she’ll likely finish jotting down the basic plot when they got back. Chris grabbed the ballpoint pen she had been using and was about to go back and fix her grammar when something caught his eye.

   A small doodle Claire had in the corner. It was a cat.

   Chris squinted and looked it over carefully. It looked familiar.

   Suddenly it dawned on him. He had seen this before.

   Chris’ mind started racing, putting all the pieces together. But.. But how could he prove it? And how could he prove it without worrying Claire?

   Chris then looked back at the pen in his hand and had a perfect idea.

   Meanwhile Claire was hiding in the bathroom. She knew this was a bad idea. She knew this was gonna be horrible! She knew this was gonna happen and she just had to keep playing with fire, didn’t she??

   “Stupid stupid stupid!” Claire banged her head on the wall. “Listen! To your! Intuition!!”

   Of course she knew who he was. Ever since the first day Trilby introduced him at the STP.

   Claire and Trilby were discussing the differences in using iodized salt compared to sea salt, though ultimately, they both knew pink Himalayan was best. But then Claire felt it. A familiar presence.

    She suddenly felt an oncoming wave of giddy excitement that made her almost tremble. And a familiar warmth that quickly wrapped around her like a towel fresh out of the dryer.

   “Claire? You okay?”

   “Think someone’s-”

   “Trilby! We gotta go do a thing with cake- Oh. Hey.” Chris had rounded the door to Trilby’s cubicle but stopped short seeing Claire.

   “Hey.” Claire waved.

   “First of all, never again. Secondly, I never introduced you two, have I? Chris, meet Claire. Claire-”

   But she already knew who he was. But a deep anxiety prevented her from saying anything. But after getting to meet him, within all of five minutes she forgot entirely, simply living in the moment. And then she forgot again when they agreed to meet up after work. And she kept forgetting to a point it would’ve felt awkward to start saying anything then and gosh dammit.

   ‘Claire, why do you do this to yourself??’ she sighed and stepped out of the bathroom. ‘Always have to make everything awkward and weird…youfreak Can’t just remember to freaking speak up and say what’s on your mind?’

   Claire only hoped Chris would drop the subject and they could return to their normal status quo. At least she got to see him. At least they got to talk face to face. It was better than what most people could hope for. After all, some people never find their soulmates.

  ‘But they write every day.’  her unhelpful thoughts reminded her as she returned to the car. ‘When was the last time we wrote to each other?’

   She opened the car door and-

   “I KNEW IT!!!”

    “Aah!”

   Claire stumbled back, tripped on her heels and fell backwards onto the pavement.

   “What the hell, Chris?!” Claire scolded as she picked herself up.

   “Take a look in the mirror!”

   She got up and looked at her reflection in the window. She gasped, seeing a rather crude doodle of a cat across her cheek. She looked through the window only to find Chris with a matching mark and a wide grin stretching from ear to ear.

   “Why the hell didn’t you tell me?!” he asked.

   Claire stammered, laughed, and ended up crying. Her heart was pounding, she felt scared and worried. Chris’ smile disappeared and he got out of the car and came around to her.

   “Hey.. Hey hey hey. Hang on now.” he came over and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “What? What is it?”

   “I thought you’d hate me.” Claire managed to get out with a hiccup.

   “I know.. I’m sorry.. I didn’t hate you. I never did! I just.. You…”

   “Scared you.. Like.. I scare everyone.” she sniffled.

   “No! You didn’t scare me! I just.. I.. I dunno.” Chris shrugged. “I was a dumb teenager. I didn’t know what I was feeling.. I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry…”

   Claire simply shook her head. Chris ran a hand through his hair and thought for a moment.

   “...If it’ll make you feel better I could still kick my ass.”

  Claire laughed. She choked and then giggled some more and finally started wiping away her tears.

   “Please don’t.”

   Chris smiled and hugged her tight. She weakly hugged him back.

   “I’m sorry.”

   “I know..”

   After that, they began writing to each other more and more often. Little notes, here and there.

 “That was a lot of fun last night.”

 “There’s coffee in the breakroom.”

 “Fought a ghost. It was gross.”

 “Kissed one the other day.”

 “I’m stealing the last slice of cake. Don’t tell Trilby.”

   It was nice. It was fun. It was one thing that Claire would say was normal about their lives.

  “You wanna do something else after work tonight?”

 “I got a new cat figurine!”

 “Got to see the sunset while on the job. Reminded me of..”

 “Hey you’ve been quiet. You okay?”

 “Can I tell you something?”

   “I love you.”

[meltedhorror]

Midsommar; as reviewed by me, a Swede

Okay so! Finally got around to writing this. This might be a long post, but oh well. Obvious spoiler warning.

For those who don’t know, I’m a Swede, born and raised in Sweden, having celebrated Midsummer every year that I’ve been on this earth. So needless to say - I would dare to say I know a bit about Midsummer. BUT I will admit that I may not be the very most knowledgable about how it was celebrated in the past and the exact origins about it. But I’ll try my best.

SO IMPORTANT TO KNOW BEFORE WE START TALKING ABOUT HOW THEY HANDLED MY CULTURE IN THE MOVIE.

Midsummer (in Swedish Midsommar) is the celebration of the fertilization of the earth, or the world being reborn anew. The celebration is to ask the gods/spirits to bless us with a good year of harvest and to keep our animals healthy. And thats the rough explanation of it.

So lets get into the movie stuff and see what they got accurate, no?

When our main cast arrive in Sweden and get to... I forgot the name of the place they went to-- I have relatives who come from there. Anyway, they are greeted with people doing drugs, drinking mushroom tea (also drugs) and being greeted by the multiple day celebration and preparation for Midsummer.

I don’t know how it is in other countries, but yes some people do make tea on special mushrooms here, and you do get high on it. You get these mushrooms from cow or horse shit, cause they grow in that, and then you make tea of it. It causes mostly hallucinations. I have friends who do it and I’ve been offered it a few times as well.

I don’t really know how every single person in this country spends their days before Midsummer, some may very well be hanging out doing drugs. But thats not really something majority of people do (surprise surprise).

When it comes to celebrating for a longer time.

It depends on where you are in the country. Some people make a huge thing out of it, celebrating sometimes the entire month, while others (like me) only spend like two days preparing and one day celebrating. It really depends on the people, how many are attending each separate celebration, and if its a local community centre (hembygdsgård in Swedish) thats holding the celebration.

What you do during this preparing time is things like building the majstång (dunno the translation tbh), make the food, depending on where you are make the special clothes for each participant, and a lot of girls pick flowers (we’ll get into that later).

So.. The clothes?

Yes! So we see people wearing these special clothes in the movie, and in this case they’re completely white and have runes on them. Again this depends on where you are and how you celebrate Midsummer if you actually wear these clothes.

Many hembygdsgårdar have them, and a lot of people do wear these clothes. But they come in many variants!

As you can probably tell, we don’t wear just plain white, but dress pretty colourful for the occasion!

You’d also probably wear a flower crown if you celebrated. Me and my mom always used to make flowercrowns for Midsummer when I was a kid, although they always came out very bad lmfao

So the midsommarstång or majstång?

Ah yes, can’t forget the main piece of the event! And I’m so glad they got it accurate in the movie! Or... Accurate with minor changes lmfao

(I couldn’t find a better picture I’m sorry)

So in the other two images that are not from the movie, we also have this centre piece I guess I could call it. This is the most important thing in our celebration, and it comes in two variant. The classic symbolism one (I will explain don’t worry) and one thats just a leafy pole with ribbons coming from the top.

The version we see in the movie however is the most common and has huge symbolism. What they did change about it though is that they put runes in the rings, which to my knowledge no one has ever done in this day and age, nor in the past.

BUT ANYWAY THE SYMBOLISM, DAMN I GET OFF TRACK FAST.

Remember how I said Midsummer is the celebration of the rebirth of the earth? The majstång symbolises a penis and a vagina, going into the ground to fertilize the earth and give life anew. Yes. We dance around a massive dick and coochie, what do you do during your summer?

The majstång is made of wood and leafy branches and a lot of the time is held together with steel wire or other sticks that are more bendable. And in my opinion? They nailed it in the movie.

I mentioned the girls picking flowers.

Okay so the day before Midsummer (I’m pretty sure at least) the girls would go out to pick flowers. But you have to do it in a certain way (which I don’t remember honestly) and you have to pick seven types of flowers. You have to walk backwards, and climb and walk a roof, and jump a gärdsgård (type of fence), and... Thats about what I remember.

What you do with these flowers after that is you put them beneath your pillow, and go to sleep before midnight, and then you’ll dream of your future lover.

Did I do this even though I’m a guy? Yes. Did it ever work? Hm... Not sure.

So what do the guys do? I honestly don’t really remember. I’m pretty sure you just go about your day as normal and help with chores and stuff. I might be wrong though.

They do this weird thing with their hands...

So throughout the movie you see the Swedes doing jazz hands I guess you could describe it the best. I’ve given it some thought, and I’m pretty sure what they’re doing is doing a forest clap, or a silent clap. I don’t know how it is in other countries but-

So basically when you’re out in nature you don’t want to disturb it, or you just don’t want to make a lot of noise, you can clap your hands like that. It means the same thing.

How do I know? Cause we got to learn two types of forest claps in school when I was a kid when we were out looking at rocks that got fucked when the great ice moved across the land.

So it might look weird, and I do admit it IS weird, but they are essentially just clapping their hands at things.

Okay, so how about the runes and learning runes?

In the movie they talk about how all the kids learn runes and how they write in runes. This is not something we do, obviously. But we do learn runes in school! Believe it or not, there was a time when I could write fluent runes and translate Swedish into runes.

They also talk about the runes having a great power. And this is actually interesting!

Back in the days of the Vikings, when we wrote in runes for real, they believed that the runes had powers and that if you etched the runes in with a weapon, either the rune got power of the weapon did (don’t remember which one). Thats why the runes do not have curved lines, because it was both difficult to make curves with something you slash at a rock or piece of wood, and you wouldn’t get as much power out of the rune/weapon.

Some runes have specific meanings, but majority of runes you’ll learn or see are just plain out letter you use to create words.

Runes are not inherently connected with Midsummer in the sense they want it to in the movie.

They made two old people jump off a cliff and die.

Okay so me being ever so slightly uncultured didn’t really know what this was either until I watched the movie, however my mom did.

Ättestupa was a way of punishing people, more specifically criminals. Once sentenced to have committed a crime, you could be thrown off this cliff and people would gather around to watch this. Think beheading in France, but instead you throw someone off a cliff.

That’s what my mom knows about it, and we actually live pretty close to one of these spots. However I’m a bit unsure if that was the only thing, as Google wants to tell me otherwise. They may very well have made old people jump, or them deciding themselves to jump.

But I can guarantee this has absolutely nothing to do with Midsummer.

So... THAT scene...

You know what I’m talking about. That one scene that got the entire audience to laugh uncontrollably in my case.

First thing I have to mention about this is that they state she’s Byxmynding, which they did explain as of legal age to have sex in the movie. And thats exactly what it is. Its the age of consent, or rather when you turn the age of consent. You become Byxmynding.

This age is 15 here in Sweden, and it is not legal for someone above the age of 18 to have sex with someone who is 15.

I just wanted to throw that out there.

Now obviously here’s where we step away from what is true and what is fiction and just horror. But I will also say that I’m pretty sure somewhere I’ve read that in the past that during Midsummer there would be orgies to celebrate the rebirth of the earth.

Don’t take my word for it, I may be wrong. But I’m pretty sure that was a thing.

Nowadays a lot of new age people in this country do that however.

The dude hanging from the ceiling with his lungs out his back.

This was a way of torture during the Viking age. You could either do this from the chest or from the back, but the intention was to make it look like you had wings as you were slowly dying.

The dancing around the majstång and the food.

This is something we do, we do dance around the majstång to music. As for the whole dance until you can’t stand anymore because myth of girls dancing to their death thing, I can’t confirm it and I can’t deny it. Its probably something pretty accurate, and I want to remember actually hearing that as a kid when we celebrated in school.

When we dance, depending on where, the people, etc etc, you may have a live band playing things like the fiddle, accordion, guitar, flute, things like that. Or you may just put on a recording of Små Grodorna and jump around to that.

We dance around for a while to the music, maybe play games during it, and then we finish to go eat with our family/friends/other people (Depending how you celebrate)

What we eat is things like herring, surströmming, boiled potatoes, eggs, knäckebröd... Maybe other things too. Personally I’m no big fan of the fish thats served and I usually just eat smoked salmon that I brought myself so I won’t starve.

So... What are my final thoughts about this movie?

I actually really enjoyed it! I could tell they put in good amount of research to make this, and thats always appreciated. Of course Midsummer as a normal thing here is not scary or horrific like in the movie. What I would describe what we see in the movie is cultish, and almost mixed with new age in a way.

They did a great job of depicting it as something strange and twisted, even to an audience who has been raised with this celebration.

I also really appreciate that they hired Swedish actors and actually spoke real Swedish!! It did so much for the movie to me, unlike other films set in Sweden (cough cough The Ritual fuck you thats not Swedish). I don’t know if English speaking who don’t know Swedish get English subtitles on the parts they speak Swedish, but it still does so much. And the dialogue didn’t feel forced or strangely translated, it felt... Natural. Even in a creepy way. But I will admit that a lot of the line delivery was very stiff and robotic.

I enjoyed it. As strange as it is, I enjoyed it.

Oh also the singing you hear throughout I’m pretty sure is a weird mix of Joik, which isn’t inherently Swedish, but eh who cares at this point

[withered-rose-unbreakable-lotus]

Tag Game: Get To Know The Mun

Answer the questions below and tag 11 people you want to know better!

The post was kind of long so I am answering in a new one. Thank you @sweet-strawberry-blog for the tag. ^^

1. What do you prefer to be called name wise?

Honestly, no idea. My name is Maria and that’s how everyone calls me. I don’t like my name nor any of its variations so I just go with it.

2. When is your birthday?

Not telling. :3

3. Where do you live? (You don’t have to give a city, you can give the state if you’re USA or country if you are overseas)

I live in Greece.

4. Three things you are doing right now?

Answering these questions while having ihascupquake playing on youtube on the background. I don’t do anything else. ^^’

5. Four fandoms that have your peak interest right now?

Visual kei & Danganronpa. Nth else at the moment.

6. How has this pandemic been treating you?

I am fine, I am staying inside and all but most people don’t so I am afraid it will get worse soon and like Italy we’ll lose many people. Especially since summer is here, the quarantine days are lifted and every idiot who was looking forward to vacation is going to come here cause partying in Mykonos is more important than everyone’s health, obviously. I worry about my mother cause the pandemic has made things harder for her and her health and she couldn’t visit doctors etc, but well...(it’s not corona, it’s other things but now i am worried about that too).

7. A song that you can’t stop listening to right now?

Any Halsey song really.

8. Recommend a movie:

Oh I am bad at this, I am more of a music person xD. I have watched so many films ever since I was a kid that new ones don’t impress me easily and I rarely watch new stuff. If you don’t mind about when it was made though, I’d suggest the Addams Family movies. It’s cute, it’s fun, I love it. For horror films I’d say the basics, like Saw, Silent Hill, even REPO! The Genetic Opera if you are into musicals too. Other movies, well I like Charlie’s Angels (not the most recent one, it’s awful in my opinion), any Tim Burton film, I love them. What else? I think it’s enough.

9. How old are you?

26. Though I am acting like a 16-18 year old most times and when we get to deep conversations I might sound like an old lady about some things.

10. School, University, Occupation, Other?

I guess I will die locked up in the hell that my informatics uni is. I absolutely hate it and I wish to drop it, but unless I get a job, I am having severe fears to do it, to announce it to my parents, since I am living with them, I got to be doing sth with my life you know? I am a loser, not much to be said. I am also studying Japanese, I am good at this, dunno if it’s good enough to pass the proficiency tests but it’s the only thing that’s moving forward in my life and I am holding on to it tight. I don’t have a job but I like considering myself an artist. I do photomanips and can edit videos (though I haven’t touched the latter in a long time). Generally graphics and stuff I can do but where to find a job for that in a country like mine that still lives centuries behind most countries and is mostly conservative as fuck. :D

11. Do you prefer heat or cold?

Cold. Always cold.

12. Name one fact about you that others may find unusual?

Well I am generally considered unusual here, due to my opinions, beliefs, tastes etc. People from other countries I am talking with seem to find me way more normal than Greek people, I don’t know. I guess being straight and supporting LGBTQ+ people is crazy here. Liking horror is crazy if you invest yourself to it past watching movies for the scares (like, people have asked me why i like it so much if I don’t get scared and I am like “aesthetic xD“). I like very revealing clothes too (never wear them though cause i hate myself and also hate people’s attention) which many people find extreme here....what else. Oh and I loooove guys putting on makeup and having long beautiful hair ever since I was a little shit. These things are very unusual here for some reason. The question asked one fact I know but I feel like ranting so here you go xD.

13. Are you shy?

Yes, but it doesn’t always show. (luckily) And I hate it cause it deprives me of many opportunities. Being shy i mean, not its not showing.

14. Do you have preferred pronouns?

She/Her

15. Biggest Pet Peeve? Lies, ungratefulness, being late repeatedly, cheating on people, girls ignoring their friends to spend more time with boyfriend (find a middle ground or bye bitch xD)

16. What is your favorite “dere” type?

Yandere. Dunno why. Maybe because I am leaning more towards Tsundere myself. I tend to like crazy people. Though I don’t think I would be able to deal with Yandere people in real life.

17. Rate your life 1-10, 1 being really crappy and 10 being the best it could ever be.

Taking into consideration my health is generally good, that I have my basic necessities met, my mother is still around and I have access to a lot of music I’d say 4-5. But only due to these. I most definitely hate my life and don’t really want to be alive but I can’t be ungrateful and say that I don’t have those very basic things. I am grateful I have a roof above my head, food to eat, a mother who cares and lots of music to listen to.

18. What is your main blog?

The one I am answering this from.

19. List your side blogs and what they are used for.

I have around 15 locked blogs I never finished xD. Aaaall of them fanpages besides one I have for the graphics I use in my blogs and one for promoting a story I am writing. The open ones are REIGN’s fanpage @club-reign , the Valentine’s fanpage (which also has a couple of ex bands of the members) @fi-ance-trust-thevalentine both of which are mainly inactive and act as archived blogs for any fans who get to like these bands after their disband and for old fans to have sth to remember. My writeblr is @dotr-rose-love . Everything else is locked.

20. Is there anything you think people need to know about you before becoming friends with you?

I am a very pessimistic person who might go over and over the same subject if you ask to listen to me. So if you feel drained by people being sad about the same things often, don’t ask me to open up to you :P. We can talk with just you opening up ^^. Other than that I am a good listener but if we are not veeery close, I might not always be as responsive as you’d like me to be or as warm. I need time to show warmth. I am an open book about other things but yeah. And if we don’t click easily it might literally take years xD. I am fine with simple chats too just not too much small talk cause I suck at this. xD At some point you might feel like oh she doesn’t want to talk to me, but honestly it’s me having no idea what else to add. I’d rather us get straight to a deep conversation or sth xD. Sometimes I might also not have the energy to speak to anyone so I might take a day or two to reply, but definitely not a month. Oh and since this is a big theme I had an issue about before, I am pro-choice, so if we speak of love and you start trying to tell me to change my mind, you will most likely have me barking and in a really bad way.

[onedirectionfanfics]

Stall by @MysteryMixtapes 

This month’s featured story is our first one from Wattpad! Stall by MysteryMixtapes piqued every Harry stan’s interest over the summer. With over 3.5 million reads, it is one of the beautiful, funniest and most-heartbreaking fanfic on Wattpad. Prepare for your heart to melt as Abby, shy as a mouse, cracks Harry’s tough cocoon in this dangerous fic involving high-end clubs, sketchy people, and—of course—a bathroom stall. Check our interview with the author below!

"You wanna try and be my medicine Abby?" he asks with a deep testing tone, keeping his voice quiet.

"I can try," I breathe out as I gulp when his grip tightens "Try me."

His hand slides up my throat, his long fingers wrapping tight around my jaw "That's what you really want?"

I nod, as I sigh out a shallow yes, and I see every muscle in his body tense, as he wets his lips; hoarsely murmuring his next sentence like its his last try at making me change my mind.

"I'm dangerous Abby, this is your last chance, tried to warn you."

My stomach twists and knots, as I use every ounce of bravery I have.

"Prove it then."

How long have you been writing for?

I’ve been writing since December 2018. So about 9 / 10 months give or take. I only started writing when I made my wattpad account, never had any inclination to do it before a day in my life. I’m surprised I can spell, honestly. Stall was the first story I’d ever written.

Do you have certain habits or rituals you have to do while writing?

The only habit I really have is listening to music. I can’t write without it (or at least hate writing without it), but other than that, not really. I just whack on some tunes and verbally vomit from my brain.

The ever famous question: how did you come up with this idea?

This is a hard question for Stall, because there’s like a clusterf*ck of answers that all kinda got mashed together. I wanted to write a cliche bad boy / good girl, with the stereotypes and see if I could make it interesting. Put my own twist on it, give it substance or good reasoning, and honestly the start of the story is kind of poking fun at bad boy characters. It was all on purpose. I like things that aren’t what they seem, and I like breaking stereotypes so for me, using that cliche was fun to play with and break down. I like paradoxes and enigmas too. I wanted to write a character that should be, by all accounts technically unlovable and essentially a villian; then see if I could make him loveable and have that as a romantic lead. I wanted to see if I could make a character like his, someone people would empathise with and feel compassion for. Plus it was an opportunity for me to mash all these genres together (romance / mystery /thriller / horror / comedy / erotic) into one big mess, that happens to be my book. I also wanted to write a shy female lead, that was super kind but not weak. Kindness is a strength. I wanted to show that. I dunno, I have a dark sense of humour and like horror movies, and cult 90’s films so that influenced it a lot as well.

When does a story go from an idea in your mind to paper? Is there a process you go through before writing it out, or do you just get straight in it?

Okay, so first of all I would like to start off with I am THE MOST disorganised person, ever. I suck at planning and for the most part, my stories are just in my head and I wing it as I go with a general idea / goal / outcome / theme in mind. I really don’t have some fantastic answer, it’s literally just “That sounds kinda cool, I wanna tell that story” and hope I don’t f*ck it up. They go from an idea to paper, when I literally can’t get the damn idea out of my head and it’s going to drive me up the wall until I get it out.

You have a well-developed and complex plot, spanning over a hundred chapters. Was this something that took you a long time to build? Do you ever make stuff up as you go?

I think it’s really lovely, that you think I have a well developed plot - because I didn’t think that haha. I was shocked the first time someone said that to me, and didn’t even realise I was following a ‘plot’. I know nothing about writing, I didn’t even know I was doing character development. I just wrote what made sense to me, and followed that to be able to tell the story. So I was LITERALLY just making it up as I went. My plan is that I had no plan at all, except for a vague idea. I wrote the entire thing in 5 months.

Did you ever find it hard to keep up with the plot or the twists and turns? 

I mean, it was a headache. But it wasn’t hard to keep up with because I only wrote what made sense to me and I wasn’t trying to shock anyone, or throw in twists for the sake of it. They all had a good reason or purpose so they weren’t hard to keep up with, for me personally.

Harry’s extreme fear of water, while unusual, was written well enough to make all of us scared of it for him. Do you have any strange phobias, you can never get over (or one you did get over?)

I have a huge phobia of spiders (which is unfortunate considering I live in Australia and we have giant ones that just hang out on your wall like they pay rent) and I’m not overly fond of heights, but I wouldn’t call it a phobia. But in saying that, I’d rather get in a bathtub of spiders than ever do something like public speaking.

There are a lot of dark themes involved in this story, from domestic abuse to torture and PTSD, do you enjoy working with these themes? Are they challenging in any way?

There are a lot of darker themes in that book, and I tend to have an easier time writing them. I usually only write about what I understand, or what I’m interested in. I’m really interested in human psychology, and the ‘why’ in understanding the reason people act the way they do. The cause and effect of things. I also like writing things with lots of emotion. It can get really difficult to write, there’s been a fair few times it took a really heavy toll on me mentally and emotionally writing some of the scenes in that story, and took me a few days to even feel normal again. I guess being a writer is just hurting your own feelings with fake scenarios, hey? But I also think writing is where you can be the most honest, and there is a lot of honesty in emotion.

How do you find such perfect gifs for the end of every chapter?

If you’ve read Stall, you’re gonna know why this is blasphemy. But I get them from Google (heinous, I know, shame on me). Another thing wattpad has taught me, is apparently I’ve got a knack for reaction gifs. hah.

Not to make Abby sound like a Mary Sue, but you often write her exact thoughts in response to things she can’t voice out loud. Is this your way of subtly inserting your own thoughts sometimes?

I put a lot of my own thoughts in the story in different ways, and Abby’s inner monologue is a funny way to do that sometimes. But I do it with Harry too. Abby thinking her responses was all part of her character, for her to get to a point where she could actually say what she was thinking at some point aloud. It was something for her to grow with.

Other than meeting once three years prior to the events in the story, Abby and Harry’s lives are more connected than we thought. Would you consider them to be soulmates with entwined fates or is there a possibility that they could have never met and none of this would happen?

I don’t consider them soulmates, I’m a bit pessimistic in regards to the notion of soulmates but I believe in variations of them. I do think, most things happen for a reason and inexplicable coincidences happen in life and that’s what I'd boil it down to. Honestly, there’s several times where things could have went ass backwards with those two, and they never would have seen each other again, but as luck would have it - they met again. (It's me, I am luck.)

Anything you’d like to say to anyone who read your fic?

Ah man, that’s a hard one. I wrote half the story drunk, and have the typos and random grammatical dumpster fire parts to prove it because it’s all a first draft and totally unedited, so I’ve never exactly been out here thinking anyone would read it and I’m still f*cking gobsmacked anyone did, let alone liked it. But, if you’ve read my word salad and liked it, I appreciate you and you’re the ranch dressing that made it special.

***

Thank you so much to the author for being so lovely! Check out more of her work here! If you want to submit a fic you think should be featured next month do it here!

[jadewing-realms]

“Some people call this wisdom.”

Transitioning back into general AU stuff with this! Goodness, I don’t know why, but Ochako is much harder to write for me than Katsuki... and i feel bad because she deserves all the love too. TuT But i dunno, maybe my brain’s just really tired...

When Ochako stepped into the elevator at the Gunhead MA Hero Agency, she never would have predicted the pickle she’d find herself in in just ten minutes. She’d checked in at the front desk, just like any normal person; she had an appointment. A job interview. As much as she loves rescue work and having Ryukyu as her boss, she feels ready to move on to bigger things. Tougher things. So she’d gotten in contact with the Battle Hero who’d trained her back in high school—he’d welcomed her to an interview without hesitation.

It hadn’t taken much to get past the front desk. With her credentials, work experience, and Quirk, she’d  be a superb addition to the Gunhead team, despite her lower position in the national rankings. She’s in the top 20, which will still mean a lot. It’s a win-win for both.

She’d been a bit nervous when she found the elevator, but job interviews are always intimidating. Even when conducted by someone you know. She’d been bracing herself for a tense ride up to the top floor when a gauntlet thrust through the closing doors, radiating blue light from the containment chamber on the palm. She recognized the glove instantly and thought it strange he hadn’t changed it at all since U.A.

The younger Uchiha is intimidating company, but Ochako’s seen far worse, considering who she’s dating these days. And despite all the horrors she’d heard about from his junior and senior years, he seemed… all right. Normal. He was as surprised to find her here as she was for him, and a bit of light small talk had followed. Small talk has never exactly been Ochako’s favorite pastime, but it will forever be better than awkward silence. It had only taken a minute for them to settle into comfortable silence.

Then something had made the building shake. The elevator shaft rumbled, the lights blinked out, and the room shuddered to a halt. Something, a number of somethings, clattered down atop the frozen metal capsule, the sound making their ears ring before all went totally silent.

And that’s how she found herself blinking into the dark, trapped in a broken elevator with Uchiha Sasuke.

His breath is quiet now, still coming from the opposite side of the blank space. “You hurt, Uraraka?” he mutters.

Just as she’s about to answer, the emergency lighting comes on, dimmer and redder than the regular lights. Still, it’s enough to survey the damage. Dust swirls around them. Directly in front of her, Sasuke stands with one hand braced against the wall, his dark eyes darting across the ceiling—surveying, same as her. He doesn’t seem to be injured at all… no blood, no scrapes, no favoring one limb over any other.

She shakes her head in the scarce light. “No, I’m good. You?”

“Just fine. What was that?”

“It happened too fast to tell. Could you hear anything? You know, with your Quirk?”

He clicks his tongue, but there’s no hostility in it. Nothing like her boyfriend. “Tch, no, it doesn’t work like that. I wasn’t expecting an attack here.”

She follows his gaze upward, across the elevator ceiling. The top is horribly dented, like something with impact strength rivaling Kirishima went and punched against it from the outside. No breaks, though. Aside from being a little off kilter, the structure seems all right…

“Think it’s safe to move?” she whispers.

His eyebrows furrow. “Why?”

“The hatch.”

He looks back to the ceiling, where she knows he can make out the edges of the emergency door just as she had, and he seems to think this over, weighty contemplation in his black eyes. Slowly, he nods. “Using your Quirk, it’s worth a shot.”

Just as she presses her fingertips together and rids herself of gravity’s pull, her phone vibrates in her coat pocket, disrupting the tension in the air with a sound that’s far too domestic for the situation. Still, Ochako reaches for it, pausing to glance at the screen, taking in the caller ID. She puffs her cheeks, and as she starts to drift aimlessly, looks to Sasuke below her.

“Hey, can you hold me steady?” She swipes her thumb across the phone screen. “Gotta take this or I’ll regret it later.”

Sasuke nods and braces his gloved hands on either side of her waist, while she raises the phone to her ear.

“Katsuki!” she greets and braces herself. “I’m a little busy right now…”

Stunningly, he doesn’t yell. Yet. Instead, he almost sounds… concerned. “Hey, you’re over at Gunhead’s right?”

“Um… yeah.” She frowns at the ceiling and reaches up with her free hand to push against the hatch. It doesn’t budge. She looks around for a latch of some kind.

“Yeah, well, there’s a full blown s***fest being reported live right now. Some Villain showed up to pick a fight with a Pro on patrol. Are you okay? You’re not fighting.”

“Oh—yeah, I’m okay. Just… a little stuck. In an elevator.” Trust Katsuki to pay attention. Though she finds his well-masked protective instinct somewhat endearing (even though he’d be the first to tell her she can totally kick a** just fine), it’s very ill-timed. It’s hard to properly search their escape route when one hand’s busy. She sighs into the receiver and tilts her head down to her ex-classmate. “Can you let me float a little higher?”

Sasuke nods and gives her a small push upwards, keeping her ascent steady until she feels she can get a better look around the hatch—or what’s supposed to be the hatch. It’s a bit… dented. Like the rest of the ceiling. Oh no, I really hope it wasn’t damaged… it’s just a panel, right? It should just push off!

“Wait,” blurts Katsuki over the line, “who’s there with you?”

“Just Sasuke. I mean, Uchiha Sasuke.” She frowns a little and glances down again, taking in Sasuke’s Hero uniform. “Um, Insight? You know who I’m talking about.”

“WHAT!?” Now he yells, and Ochako pulls the speaker a short distance from her ear, a fraction of a second too late. “THAT GUY’s there!?”

Grimacing a little, she returns the phone to its place so she can answer in a calm, rational manner. “Yes, Katsuki, that’s what I said.”

“Hello!” Sasuke says from below, still his usual monotone but loud enough that she knows her boyfriend can hear. Only fair, it seems, since both of them can hear every word Katsuki speaks in his traditionally too-loud voice. However, this is the loudest she’s ever heard Sasuke speak and it’s enough to make her look at him sideways in surprise. He raises an eyebrow in question at her peculiar reaction.

“What’s HE doing there?” Katsuki snarls.

Ochako flaps her hand even though he can’t see it. “Oh, he’s… um… actually, I dunno.” She tilts the phone away from her mouth and addresses her companion. “What are you doing here? I forgot to ask.”

“Working,” is Sasuke’s short answer, again spoken loud enough so that Katsuki can hear.

She doesn’t need to have her ear close to hear his rising irritation. “No, what is he DOING there??”

“I think he means specifics,” she mutters a half-attempt at mediation to Sasuke, who just rolls his eyes.

“Prostitution. What do you think, genius?”

While Ochako feels herself blush a little bit at the very idea, Katsuki’s much less… lowkey. “DON’T SCREW WITH ME!”

Sasuke just scoffs, looking done now that his sense of humor has been so under-appreciated. “A collab. Geez…”

Ochako’s eyebrows raise and she latches onto the change in subject. “Oh? I didn’t know you did that sort of thing.”

“Yeah, I’m nowhere near as good as my brother, but…” Sasuke shrugs. “My Quirk makes martial arts come fairly easy. Gunhead has some newbies who need shaping up.”

“Ahh, I see, that’s really cool!”

“I’M STILL HERE YOU KNOW!”

With a bit of a squeak, Ochako hurries to return the phone to her mouth. “Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean to leave you hanging, Katsuki.”

On the other end, her boyfriend just huffs and there’s a brief beat of silence. When he speaks again, he’s much quieter.

“He’s not… doing anything, is he?”

Ochako snorts. “No, Katsuki. We’re trying to get out the hatch. He’s holding me steady while I try to get the door open.”

“Holding… you steady?”

“Yeah. Hey, Katsuki, I need to set the phone down for a second. I can’t do this one-handed. Here, talk to Sasuke a minute.”

When the Uchiha in question gives a slight nod of his head in confirmation, Ochako activates her Quirk on her phone and sends it floating his way. Trusting him to handle it from there, she then arches her back and starts running both hands across the edges of the hatch, search growing slightly frantic. There has to be some kind of lever or handle or something…

“Hi Bakugou,” Sasuke oozes false amity and Ochako just knows it’s going to tick the h*** out of the explosive man on the other end. She gets the feeling that’s exactly why the Uchiha did it. Their spite match is no joke.

As she braces both hands against the hatch door, Sasuke gives a derisive sniff. “I’m holding onto your girlfriend.”

Her lips pinch and she shoots him a mild look of reprimand. “Did you have to say it like that?”

He gives an absent nod, to her disgruntlement, and seems to give the phone the driest stare as he possibly can in his peripheral. It’s a crying shame she can’t hear what’s going on. Actually… that’s startling. Why is Katsuki being so quiet all of a sudden?

“Some people call this wisdom,” Sasuke says in response to something else she can’t hear.

She unfortunately can’t dwell on that right now. She tries shoving her shoulder into the hatch, to see if it’ll budge, but it’s hard to generate momentum for impact when you don’t have gravity. Ah, the drawbacks to being able to float…

“You’re an idiot,” Sasuke says.

This time, she can definitely hear the faintest of sound from the phone, even from her distance. “THE H***, A**HOLE, YOU BETTER NOT—”

Sasuke muffles the phone against his collar and gazes up at her calmly. “Find anything?”

Ochako sighs. “I can’t get it to budge… I wonder if these dents did it?”

“If it was rubble that fell, it could be resting on top of it,” he offers.

Her eyes widen and she glances from him to the hatch and then back again. “Oh, hey, that would make sense… I wonder if I can get it cracked enough to float it?”

“No, Bakugou, I’m scheming with Ochako. Please hold.” Again, Sasuke muffles the phone. His expression doesn’t change at all; how he’s so relaxed while he’s busy dealing with her volatile boyfriend, she has no clue. It’s quite the feat. “Try it.”

Again, she attempts to ram herself into it, to no avail. She just can’t get the right leverage or weight behind herself. Ugh, of f***ing course the door she has to use her Quirk to reach won’t open with her Quirk active! Just f***ing great!

…one of these days, I need to step back and reanalyze all the vocabulary I’m picking up from Katsuki.

“Deactivate your Quirk.” Sasuke releases her waist and ducks under her, turning around and standing up again with her thighs resting on his shoulders. “Okay, go.”

Trying not to think too hard about their current situation, Ochako releases her Quirk and feels her body weight return to her. Sasuke grunts a little. Then, while she throws everything she has into trying to pry the hatch open outward, even one, two inches, something, the Uchiha raises the phone back into place.

“Calm down, sir,” he deadpans, “I can feel the vibrations from your volume in my coat. I’ll have to ask you to lower your voice.”

He sounds like a customer service agent. Ochako snickers a little, despite herself.

“Well, I’m sure Ochako’s flattered to know you trust her so much.”

Now there’s an undeniable pointedness to his voice and Ochako gives pause at the spike of tension in the air. Wait, what on earth are they talking about?

She tries the hatch again, just one more time, and this time she heaves into it as much as she possibly can. The door wobbles a fraction of an inch. Something rocks atop the roof. Sasuke lurches, and so does the entire elevator with the horrific sound of metal grating against metal. For one terrible second, Ochako’s stomach drops.

The elevator sinks down three inches… and stops.

For a moment, both of them are frozen, too afraid to move. Then Ochako sags against Sasuke’s head.

“Oh my gosh…” she breathes.

“I think we’re stuck here for now,” Sasuke voices what she now knows in her mind. She nods once, not even trying to argue, and removes her gravity again before she swings off his shoulders. She does not want to do any more jostling than she needs to at this point… three inches was already too far to fall. And they’re several stories up.

Once she sets her feet on the ground as gently as possible and returns her own weight, she holds her hand out for the phone. “Here, let me talk to him.”

Sasuke gladly hands the device over. “I hate your boyfriend, by the way.”

The tension from both before and the sudden scare bring a nervous laugh bubbling to her throat. “Haaa ha ha ha, he, uh… he hates you too.”

“I know.”

“OCHAKO!” Katsuki’s voice tears over the connection, making her jump. She hurries to put it against her ear and give him a response.

“S-Sorry! Okay, I’m here.”

“I heard something crash.”

“Oh, we’re okay. I just… moved too much. The elevator slipped a little.”

“It’s loose!?”

“Yeah, but… it seems to be okay now that we’re not moving. So… I think we’re gonna be stuck here for a while.” She purses her lips and tries her best to send her apologizes over the airwaves. “I might be late to dinner tonight…”

“Don’t apologize, d*** it. Just stay safe!”

She smiles a little. “You know I will, Katsuki.”

“Uh-huh… uh-huh, and hey, since when are you on a first-name basis with that loser?”

She blinks, her mind doing a nice backflip to try and account for the sudden shift from concern to suspicion. Or… maybe it’s all the same? She glances across the elevator, through the darkness that her eyes have grown accustomed to, and meets Sasuke’s gaze, which is just as unimpressed as it always is. “Sasuke? I mean… I dunno, ever since third year. Remember, it was hard to call him ‘Uchiha’ while we were at his house doing all that training with Itachi? I guess it’s just habit now…”

“Yeah, well, c-can you just… not??”

Slowly, far too slowly, it’s beginning to dawn on her what this really is. She’s not sure why she didn’t think of it before… it just hits her now. She plants her free hand on her hip and if she was home now, she’d be giving him that Look that she learned from his mother. “Katsuki… what’s this really about?”

Silence. Then… he sighs. She waits.

“I just…” He’s properly subdued himself. He doesn’t sound terribly happy about it… but he does it for her. “I just feel like I should be there… not him. That’s… that’s it. It’s stupid.”

She looks at Sasuke again. He’s sunk down to sit on the floor with his back against the elevator doors. His head is tilted back, the reddish light illuminating his pale face framed and half-covered by his dark hair. Now that he’s older, he looks even more like his brother…

He’s handsome, sure. Just… not her type.

She speaks with a fond smile. “Maybe a little. Katsuki, I can’t step into an elevator without thinking about you. Remember, our first kiss was in an elevator? We were going to the observation deck at the Skytree while you were on break, and you stole it once the elevator doors closed.”

“G—F—D… Ochako, don’t just SAY that, not—”

“Well, do you remember or not?”

A beat passes. Then, “…mm.”

She nods. “So please, don’t worry. Everything’s gonna be fine.”

“I’m not—… I’m not f***ing worried. You’re stronger than everyone out there fighting that stupid Villain right now.”

Her smile widens. “Okay. Good.”

Her phone buzzes against her temple and she raises it away to glance at it. An alert fills her screen, which makes disappointment fill her gut. She whimpers a little.

I really need to get better at keeping this thing charged…

“Um, Katsuki… my battery’s running low.”

“Again!? Ochako, I swear—!”

“I know, I know. I just need to hang up now to save what I’ve got. I’ll text you though, okay?”

He growls, but there’s not much incense behind it and she knows he’s lost most of his fight for now. “F***ing… fine.”

“All right. We’ll get outta here soon.”

“Mm-hm, the Pros’ve almost caught the guy…”

“Great. See you soon, then. I love you!”

There’s a brief beat in which Ochako can almost vividly imagine the distinct shade of pink his cheeks are tinging. When he replies, it’s a harried mumble that only she can accurately interpret.

“MmmIloveyoutoo.”

No longer able to help a grin, she lowers the phone from her ear and ends the call. Immediately, she dims the brightness and then locks the screen, in hopes of conserving what 12% battery power she has left. Then, with great care, she sags against the wall opposite her unfortunate Comrade in Trapped, and sinks to the floor. Their feet brush parallel to one another in the small, cramped space.

She runs the last few minutes over in her mind, absorbing all the information so as not to forget as much later—specifics are so hard for her to recall once they’re past…

Suddenly, she turns to Sasuke. “Hate’s a strong word.”

Sasuke cracks his eyes open. “Hm?”

“Before, I said Katsuki hates you. But… that’s not what I meant.”

He blinks. “That’s what I meant. ‘Hate’ is a perfect word.”

She smirks a little, knowing at least half-well that he’s simply being his naturally-intense self. Which is something she has a lot of experience in. “He actually respects you a lot. You and Deku and Todoroki… you’re his rivals and that means more than he’ll ever say. You give him something to work hard toward.”

And quite to her amusement, he looks terribly uncomfortable. He stares off to one side, shifting his feet. His boots brush against her ankles. “O… kay…”

Satisfied with the outcome of this, Ochako takes a note from him and rests her head back against the wall. Who knows how much of a wait they’ll be in for… but if Katsuki is right and the Pros almost have the perpetrator, they should be out in no time. She’ll have to deal with the police report and rescheduling her interview, which will be a pain… but then she’ll get to go home. To him. Maybe she should swing by the nearest market and pick up something fun for dinner, splurge a little… Something spicy, just for him. She smiles at the thought.

“So… your first kiss. An elevator? Really?”

At the amusement in Sasuke’s voice, a wave of heat rushes to her cheeks and she flops her face into her hands to hide it, dim lighting be d****ed. Her weight leaves her and she’s floating again, but… “Holy... gooooooosh, I can’t believe I said that out loud!!”

[thatmademadej]

congrats on your milestones and on completing your exams! for the shyan prompts how about them just having a good time on a road trip? -cctinsley

Wow so this took its sweet time…I started out writing an American version, then got fed up of googling stuff and decided I would write them taking a trip around Scotland, then realised that I was still googling stuff bc I just don’t know shit. @cctinsley I hope you enjoy! I did everything in my power to only do the bare minimum of research. 

—-

“Hey, what if we drove there?”

“What?” Shane turns to face him, pulling his headphones off. “Drove where?”

“To Texas.”

“Why?”

“Because…we can?”

“Ryan, that would take, like, 20 hours.”

“Yeah.” Ryan shuffles his chair closer. “That’s the point. Road trip!”

“I’m the wrong shape for road trips,” Shane says, kicking his legs out to illustrate the point. “I can barely stand the plane.”

“Don’t be a baby,” Ryan says, poking the back of his chair with his foot. “It’ll be fun. I’ve got loads of places to see on the way there.”

“Ghost places or normal places?”

“Normal places, dick.”

“How are we gonna take time off work?”

“You know neither of us have taken a holiday in two years,” Ryan scoffs. “We deserve this!”

“You think I deserve folding myself into a car for 20 hours? 21 hours!” He’d googled it whilst Ryan was distracted.

“We’d stop at things, obviously.”

Ryan pouts, and there it fucking was. Shane can not say no to him.

“Okay, whatever,” Shane says. “Let’s be a cliche.”

They leave early on a Wednesday morning, before Los Angeles has a chance to get really hot and trafficky. The highway east is practically empty, and Shane rolls his window down to get a breeze. Ryan notices him closing his eyes, leaning back against his seat, and smiles.

“Oh god, are we gonna go to Vegas?” Shane says.

“I thought about it, but then I also thought that you would definitely end up getting murked,” Ryan says, hands loose and easy on the steering wheel. “I’ve got something so much better.”

They speed through Arizona, Shane getting out and flapping his limbs around like some eldritch horror whenever they stop for gas.

“Can you…not do that? You’re scaring those children,” Ryan says, pointing his thumb at a car whilst jamming the pump into his Prius with zero mercy.

“Gotta keep my circulation going,” Shane says, shimmying his shoulders. “If my hands fall off I won’t be able to film you huntin’ ghosts.”

Ryan takes them to the Kartchner Caverns, a state park in the south of Arizona - it’s the first real stop after eight hours drive. And he’d been right; Shane would far rather see this than Vegas.

They book a twin room in a motel on the edge of Arizona, right before it becomes New Mexico, and Shane turns to face Ryan in the darkness.

“We could veer a right and just…go to Mexico.” He said.

“We could. We do have to be in Texas on Wednesday, though.” Ryan said, lying on his back and staring at the ceiling.

“Could go back to the Island of the Dolls.”

“Noooooo,” Ryan huffs a laugh, chest rising and falling under the covers.

“But it’s your heritage, Ryan.”

“If it is, then I’m just Japanese,” Ryan chuckles, and then goes still.

“But then you wouldn’t be you,” Shane says, and it must be the right thing to say, because Ryan turns to face him with a soft smile on his face.

“Nah. Wouldn’t be me.”

They leave early the next morning, crossing the border into New Mexico with a cheer from Shane and an exhilarated laugh from Ryan. They hang a north on the I25 and find themselves by the Very Large Array, Shane suspects on purpose.

“If we find aliens, this is how we’re gonna do it,” Ryan says, planting his hands on his hips and staring out across the radio dishes. It’s a weird, weird clash - the tech sat on land that feels older than time itself. The sun is beating down on Shane’s back absolutely mercilessly.

“If we find aliens? Is Ryan Bergara doubting?” He calls, and Ryan punches him lightly in the arm.

“Don’t be a doof,” He says, achingly fond. “They might find us first.”

“Sure,” Shane laughed, shoving his hands in the pockets of his cargo shorts. When it got hot, Shane went full Dad.

The AC in the car is on full blast, all the windows down, and Shane is still melting into his seat. Ryan’s forehead has a light sheen of sweat on it, trickling down over his bare shoulders. His tank top is sticking to his chest.

They stop at a diner, just in hopes that it’ll be colder than the car. It’s not, but Shane orders two ice cream floats and then plants his face in his.

“Jesus Christ!” Ryan says, jumping backwards. “God, I thought you’d died.”

Shane lifts his head, ice cream sticking to his half-beard (he hasn’t shaved since Saturday) and blinks up at him. “What on earth gave you that impression?”

“It’s too fucking hot,” Ryan grumbles, buckling himself back into the Prius. “This was a mistake.”

“Nah,” Shane says, flopping down next to him and kicking his shoes off. His feet are gonna swell up, but he doesn’t care. “It was a good idea. I’m having a good time.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah!” Shane exclaims, flailing his hands around at the desert. “Look at all this! I don’t think I’ve ever seen this much of America.”

“Nah, me neither.” Ryan says, staring out at the road through his sunglasses. “Before Unsolved, I hadn’t really left Cali. Except to go to Mexico.”

“I hadn’t even done that,” Shane says, reaching out and slapping him on the shoulder. “We’re growing as people.”

“Ha,” Ryan says. “You’re too old.”

“You’re never too old,” Shane insists. “Even ghosts can have character growth.”

“OH SHIT” Ryan yells, and Shane cracks his head off the roof of the car.

“What the fuck, Bergara?!” He demands.

“Roswell!” Ryan shouts, slamming his hands on the wheel of the car. “We have to stop in Roswell. SHIT!”

“How did you forget that Roswell was in New Mexico?” Shane laughs, intoxicated by how hyped Ryan is.

“I was too fucking excited about the VLA!” Ryan says.

They screech into Roswell in the late afternoon, as the sun dips in the sky. Ryan knows where the spaceship landed - of course he does - and he leaps out of the car, almost forgetting to turn the engine off.

“Ryan, chill.” Shane laughs, unfolding himself at a more leisurely rate. “You’re not gonna be the next person to discover aliens.”

“Nah,” Ryan says, hotfooting it over the desert. “The government are far more vigilant now, especially here.”

“So we’re just - we’re doing conspiracy theories all the time now? IRL?” Shane keeps up easily, taking one step for every one and a half Ryan takes. He suddenly comes to a screeching halt, Shane running into his back with a grunt.

“There’s nothing here.” Ryan says.

“That’s literally what I just said. It’s what you said.”

“I know. It’s just…desert though. Anticlimax.”

There really isn’t anything to see, for miles and miles. For a moment, Shane worries that they’ve lost the car, and they’re doomed to wander the desert. It wouldn’t be too bad, if it was with Ryan. They’ve done just about everything together for the last three years, and Shane still isn’t tired of it. He’s still waiting for the day Ryan gets tired of him being a goofy piece of shit.

“Come on,” He slings his arm around Ryan’s neck and leaves it there. It’s too hot, really, but he wants to feel Ryan underneath him - solid and real, in the scorching desert.

They continue on into Texas where they stop for the night. Tomorrow, they need to reach San Antonio by evening, where TJ is waiting for them. Tonight, it’s just the two of them.

The motel only has two singles, so Ryan awkwardly bids him good night and disappears into his room, leaving Shane alone in the hallway staring at a closed door.

Shane is awoken in the middle of the night by someone lifting up the covers and sliding in next to him. He reaches out a hand and feels soft hair, sharp cheekbones, a stubbled jaw - probably Ryan. Hopefully Ryan.

“Dude, what are you doing?” An indignant voice mumbles. Definitely Ryan.

“I was tryna feel your face like blind people do in movies,” Shane says. “Also, you’re the one climbing into my bed in the middle of the night.”

“I missed you,” Ryan says, and Shane laughs even though it didn’t sound like a joke.

“I feel like this entire trip didn’t happen.” Ryan says, lying with his hands awkwardly crossed over his chest. Shane doesn’t understand why he got into bed with him if he was gonna no homo the whole thing.

He feels like he’s half asleep, a strange lethargy falling over him and tempting him to do something like reach out and brush his thumb over Ryan’s stubble.

“Maybe it didn’t. Maybe we died on the highway out of Los Angeles and this is Purgatory.” He mumbles, crossing his arms to mirror Ryan.

“You say. Such weird, morbid shit.” Ryan says, reaching out and shoving him lightly on the shoulder.

“Someone woke me up in the middle of the night,” Shane says, shoving him right back. Ryan giggles - actually giggles - and Shane’s soul is…fizzing. It’s fucking late, okay.

He wakes up the next morning to the back of Ryan’s head, a back slowly rising and falling. They drive to San Antonio, a heavy silence in the car between them.

“Hang on,” Shane says right before they reach the city bounds. “We still have to drive back again.”

“Oh, yeah.” Ryans says, brightening. “The trip’s not done.”

They film. It’s the same as always. They get back in the car, and Shane folds his legs up with anticipation. Ryan reaches out and takes his hand

In Arizona, Ryan hangs a left. Wait, right, Google Maps has got him all turned around. Ryan won’t tell him where they’re going, but Shane works it out soon enough.

“You won’t be able to look over the edge of that,” Ryan says, as they meander from the Prius to the edge of the canyon. Shane has nothing to say; for once, the witty comebacks die on the end of his tongue.

“You okay, big guy?”

“What are we doing?” Shane asks. “Driving around? Pretending like we’re just - just friends? I dunno, dude, I feel…I don’t know.”

“Are we pretending?” Ryan says. “I’m not pretending.”

Shane sways, scuffs at the dirt with one worn boot. The temptation to just leap over the side of the canyon lingers over his shoulder.

“Shane?”

“I’m worried that we’re gonna go back to LA and just…carry on like we were before. Teetering on the edge of something else. In denial about all of it.” He says to the landscape, unable to face Ryan.

“Me too,” Ryan says, and a rock goes flying past Shane’s ears and over the edge.

“Cool it, dude.” Shane grumbles. “So what do we do?”

“I dunno. Stop pretending, I guess.”

And Ryan steps up behind him, slipping a hand into his and squeezing it tight. Later, they’ll drive back to Los Angeles, the final day spent with his knees up around his ears, the final day of lingering glances and bonds unspoken. Well, not the final day of that. Hopefully, the first day of something new.

----

Send me prompts!

[donut-secret-one]

Games: Of The Year

Hey, it’s me, your gamer friend “Parasite” Eve, here to talk about video games. I watched and played a few of those this year, so here’s some words about some of them, as a tumblr post, because I don’t know where else you can put a long writing thing.

GAMES ENJOYED BY WATCHING

Drakengard 3 and Ending E of Drakengard

I watched these in preparation for NieR: Automata, and it turns out I could have basically just read a summary and it would’ve been fine. I still think it’s impressive that I like the look of Drakengard 3 even though it seems like the gameplay sucks and I hate most of the characters.

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard 7: Resident Evil

I think it’s neat that each “level” of this game is like a different horror genre. Scary house with a murder man, different scary house fulla bugs, a Saw thing, a scary little girl, a Resident Evil game... it’s a cool way to make the different parts of the game seem like, different, parts of the game.

NieR (Gestalt)

This seems like a really good video game, although the playthrough I watched cut out a lot from the extra routes, so maybe those parts are boring, who knows. The big plot twists are rad and the characters are good and it’s a videogame that made me cry.

Yakuza 0

I love Majima. Remember when all those people were looking at the statue guy and he was doing his dance and they were ignoring him? Remember when he had his band play battle music? Remember when, at the end, he can’t say anything to Makoto and he just walks away and you get sad at video games again? yeah...

Kiryu’s very good too. I can’t think of as much stuff to say about him. sorry.

Yo! Noid II: Enter the Void (https://dustinbragg.itch.io/yo-noid-was-ahead-of-its-time)

I probably could have played this but I had already seen a stream of the whole thing so I didn’t. The music and the look are rad. I think I want a whole game that plays how this game looks like it does, probably.

Tekken 7

There’s a part in the story mode where everyone sees Kazuya turn into the devil and shoot a big laser beam, and then a few days later everyone forgets it happened because something else happens.

GAMES ENJOYED BY PLAYING

Fire Emblem: Heroes

I started out liking this kind of a lot but not so much anymore, and I think I pretty much just want some aspects of this to be in a “real” FE game. It lets me only use the characters I like without missing out on anything, I get to be a silent protagonist instead of a boring generic loser, and they added a vague, abstracted version of the support system that lets you be a whole lot gayer. I think in my game Camilla is married to both me and Lucina. But yeah, it turns out I just want all that in a game that’s not a Mobile Game-ass Mobile Game.

Maybe I should learn more about game dev and make that game myself.

Animal Crossing Pocket Camp doesn’t get its own section cause I basically have the same stuff to say about it. Just let me have a small house and let me make public spaces in a proper AC game. Actually I think they let you do that in Happy Home Designer. Maybe I should just play that.

Zelda: Breath of the Wild

Needs more cooking in it. Also, one time I saw a guardian shoot its laser at the ruins of an old wooden shack I was hiding behind, and it just stayed standing, and that seemed kinda weird.

For reasons this game is good, read anybody else’s GOTY list.

Team Kirby Clash Deluxe

I don’t have screenshots for all of these, okay?

So this game has free-to-play mechanics that force you to choose between “paying money” and “grinding, but only getting a certain amount of fights per day”. Apart from that though, It’s fun to try and speedrun Kirby bosses with that good kirby music.

NieR: Automata

I only finished Route A, oops.

Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow randomiser (https://github.com/abyssonym/aos_rando)

I played this about as much as any other game on this list & remembering it now makes me wanna play it more. I became good at skips in this game, and had a gun fight with Julius.

Splatoon 2

The game was pretty good I guess, but the music was even better than Splat1n. Everything by Marina and Pearl, the final boss songs, and the weird Salmon Run themes rule. I’m also real into the art of the fictional bands they make for this. Hey, nintendo, when are you makin a full rhythm game in the Splatooniverse?

Miitopia

This is a weird Mii RPG they put on 3DS. The gameplay is pretty, because it’s mostly just like, generating weird events and encounters based on the miis you’re using and the personalities you’ve assigned them? It’s pretty neat for a single playthrough but that’s about it. I kinda wanna see more games that do this kinda gimmick though. They probably exist and I’ve never heard of them.

Also I got to wear cute outfits and the relationship has that same vagueness that makes it seem gay as I talked about for FE:Heroes.

Sonic Mania

Sonic Mania is so good, it even has the bad parts of 2D Sonic. You still get crushed by dumb platforms and some of the bosses are awful. The middle section of Metal Sonic is garbage until you find out how you’re “supposed” to do it. Also why can’t Tails fight the true final boss.

After you get used to all that though, it’s a good video game. you can even go fast.

Metroid: Samus Returns

Hey, they (officially) made a new Metroid game, and it’s good. It sticks a little too closely to the original Metroid 2 in certain ways that kinda make the exploration part not as good, but they do a lotta cool combat stuff. The fights are tough but they give you checkpoints right before them so I’m fine with it at least, and even though the new final boss was a big obvious fanservicey thing, I was still way into it.

Dragonball Xenoverse 2 for Nintendo Switch

This game’s fine I guess.

Anyway I watched a bunch of Dragon Ball this year, mostly DBZ Kai. I’m just at the start of the Future Trunks arc of Super. Hey, did everyone know, Dragon Ball fuckin rules??

Super Mario Odyssey

i like when the mario does a jump.

Sonic Forces

Honestly, it’s just a sorta-worse-than-normal 3D Sonic, and that makes it a pretty fun video game. Sure, the 2D sections are bad, I wish the 3D ones played a little more like Generations, and I wish the plot was a little more entertaining, but, I got to dress up my cat and fist bump sonic and the song called “fist bump” played. It’s cool. I’d prefer the good version of this to the perfected version of Sonic Mania. probably.

Dragon Ball Fusions

Okay but -this- Dragon Ball game was actually really good. It’s a 3DS RPG where you collect Dragon Ball characters like pokemon, including like a hundred OCs made for this game that I sometimes like better than the real characters, and you fuse them together. The battles system, though, is one of the best parts. I haven’t seen much else like it. The basic idea is like a Chrono- Trigger-style thing where the attacks have an area of effect based on the position of the character using it and the target, but on top of that, attacks do knockback, and you can knock enemies into allies to do a combo attack, knock them into other enemies to bounce them off each other, or knock them out of bounds to delay them a few turns... and they can do that stuff to you as well? And so every fight is also kind of a pool game?? And it rules???

On top of that, there’s stuff around which direction you’re attacking in vs. which direction the target is blocking, using your ki blast moves to counter other people’s ki blast moves so you’re pushing back Frieza’s death ball with a galick gun, and using super moves to recruit enemy fighters... there’s all this stuff going on in the fights, and despite being a turn-based sort of tactical RPG, the fights still kinda feel like DBZ fights? I’m writing a lot about this one I think mostly because it’s the one I’ve been playing recently but also nobody talked about it whenever it came out. It’s a good RPG -and- you get to do Dragon Ball stuff. You can fuse Yamcha with Vegeta. You can fight Great Ape Broly. For some reason they replaced all the swords with sticks but people still talk about Hell and Frieza’s still all about killing children. That’s a weird one but I wanted to write a third thing that was in the game and that was the first thing I thought of.

Anyway yeah... my top games are probably Dragon Ball Fusions, Breath of the Wild, and, I dunno, Samus Returns? Sure, let’s go with that.

ANIME OF THE YEAR

Kemono Friends. I didn’t watch a lot of other anime this year... but I didn’t need to.

2018 STUFF

There’s a new Kirby game so that’ll probably be at least in my top 5 I guess. Dragon Ball Fighterz looks good but I don’t own anything that’ll be able to play it. what the hell else is coming out in 2018

“THE END OF THIS POST” OF THE YEAR

In conclusion, the games were pretty good. I think we should keep making them.

Have a nice next year!

-Eve “Good at Video Games”. No second name.

<3

[tumblunni]

More thoughts and stuff from this weird old dream I had the other day

* I’VE GOT REALLY ATTATCHED TO THE VIRUS HIVEMIND HOLY SHIT Like noooo this poor innocent friend that doesn’t understand it’s the villain I was just imagining its like “hey lets send an envoy of peace to the humans” and being so genuinely offended when they start shooting but... isn’t a horde of viral supermonsters the greatest fruit basket of all? :(

* Also like... Human assistant girl: We must destroy this wretched humanity Virus mind: That means hug them, right?

* Actually ended up thinking a lot about the design of the ‘hugging monster for hugging’! I’m thinking it has big spooky hand-wings and also hands for legs and maybe a hand tail similar to Yvetal? And either it has no head or maybe its like one of those fluffy birdy final fantasy dragons. Also a jewel on its head because Why Not.

like here’s my terrible 15 seconds scribble but i’m thinking maybe the body smaller and the wings super big so it can like.. deliver three power levels of hug hugs all the humans in its massive wings and its slightly less massive arms and then just rolls one last one up in a burrito hug on its tail

* Virus Mind: WHY DOES NO-ONE LOVE MY BEAUTIFUL MASCOT CHARACTER T_T alas they end up being melee attack units instead of making all the humans totally switch sides just at the sight of their cuteness

* it would totally just be like a super cute shoujo sparkles game of love and positivity and weird dark comedy laugh at poor virus mind thinking up silly strategies to make the humans love them, don’t pay attention to the fact you’re destroying 99% of civilization in every level Virus Mind: *puts tiny hats on the human assimilation army*

post is getting a bit long whoops

* I was also considering maybe this might even work better in an olden times jrpg setting? like, I was only thinking modern times cos thats your standard zombie game setting. or maybe future sci fi cos it could be an alien hivemind instead, but i just DO NOT LIKE sci fi so i wouldn’t be very good at writing that. But it could be like jrpg style and just like ‘the mysterious miasma that brings monsters’ and honestly there would be less Genre Rules if we’re defying tradition and mashing two genres together. And I wouldn’t be limited to what sorts of monsters I could design, which is the most important part! Also I wouldn’t really have to make it all super gross and gory and such. cos like.. i know the whole point is the subversion of the Doom Virus Of Zombies And Stuff being actually a good guy, and probably it’d be a bigger contrast if it was 100% stereotypical zombies, but also like.. i just don’t want to do it. It would be less playable by less people, and it’d be stressful to make too if i was designing characters that actually scare me. And when the whole point is that theyre NOT scary, then making them actually look it would probably just make the experience uncomfortable for everyone. But also of course like.. if they weren’t remotely MONSTERY or like SCARY IN-UNIVERSE then it also wouldnt work?? or not necessarily even scary but just like Cliche Dark Overlordy so the contrast exists. I DUNNO LOL I just know that its a hell of a lot more fun to design a whole lineup of fantasy monsters than just a bunch of gory crud. Also honestly wouldnt it be more terrifying to turn into a dragon or something instead of being exactly the same and just rotting slightly? THESE THINGS ARE SO DISSIMILAR IT IS FAR MORE SPOOKY, MY GUY also far more badass man i love dragons

* Also! a jrpg setting is just way less equipped to handle a ‘zombie phenomenon’. All the cliches would just totally not be there, they’d have to think up more creative and interesting solutions. And they also wouldnt have any perspective of seeing a bunch of movies about this, lol! And like.. wouldn’t it be interesting to think about a jrpg world where monsters have like.. a reason for being there? Theyre not a natural thing? And we’re seeing the genesis of when they first appeared in this world? Just imagine being a regular olden times peasant who’s never even seen a giraffe, and you just turn a corner and half your village is being destroyed by The First Dragon Ever And then this mysterious disembodied conciousness virus hivemind comes along and turns all the dead guys into more dragons and just What The Hap Is Fuckening, I Just Wanted To Churn Some Butter Today

* i dunno. I’m just trying to think about what should actually be changed to turn this from a weird dream into a real thing.

* Also like!! More creative ideas for the visuals! of how on earth it works! I was thinking maybe either The Mysterious Dark Fog or like The Black Snow or something? Some sort of ominous sign of reality being subtly wrong that foreshadows the impending approach of the monsters. And then the landscape itself is consumed and converted too, and its like ‘oh god do i try and venture into this twisted alien land to try and rescue my friend who got dragged off by that beast, or are they already dead?’ And then you see like a twisted corrupted reverse world of this town you’ve always known, where even the laws of physics don’t obey anymore. And its like... risking your own sanity with every second you run through this hellscape, and there’s the evil whispers from behind the trees that it would be so much easier to just give up and join the collective. Man, okay, that does actually sound like a good dark horror story, maybe it would be wasted on this premise lol? Maybe could have alternating chapters where you play as the virus and you play as the humans fleeing it? I DUNNO LOL

* I also had a vague idea for how it would work with there being poor sympathetic characters on the human side that you inevitably have to assimilate into the hivemind. I was thinking maybe they could also act like lesser ‘general’ units, like the one little girl assistant character but not quite as powerful. They wouldn’t retain as much sentience as she has, but they’d become particularly powerful monsters that could be super useful to the army. And maybe you could have sidequests to untangle their memories and resolve their last regrets? Like, get sympathetic and super depressed about these characters hours after you killed them. poor virus hivemind! it was all just a tragic misunderstanding!

* One idea I was thinking of was a duo of rival soldier guys, who I guess would be like.. warriors or town guards if this is gonna be olden times instead? Basically just generic early enemies in the first town. They’d be comic relief team rocket type guys, and hilariously inequipped to deal with the problem. And they’d kinda be jerks so you don’t feel bad for assimilating them. Not really bad guys or anything, just bad bosses who’re more obsessed with one-upping each other and getting fame and fortune than actually addressing the threat in front of them. They wouldnt believe any of the rumours about monsters until it’s too late, so its pretty much entirely their fault that the town gets so easily defeated by you. And I’m thinking maybe have them be a classic ‘grumpy and cheerful, serious and laid-back’ duo or something. though they both are equally as egotistical and competitive!

* So yeah you’d defeat them super early on in a tutorialy level, and then they’d become some of your most reliable army units for the rest of the game. I’m thinking they might actually be the ‘hug dragon’ type? And I was thinking of maybe the upgraded general version having more normal feathery wings, and these two would be colour coded. Purple and green rather than the more cliche red and blue, lol. And then like HOOOOOOOURS later you’d actually get some more backstory on these two and find out they weren’t really all that bad, and they never really hated each other. In fact they had a mutal crush that had gone unconfessed before they died, and that’s their last regret you need to fullfill to erase the last of their humanity :( Demon dragon things doing a little nose kiss :) But it symbolizes sadness :( And then maybe its possible to let one of them get away during the tutorial mission, but its impossible to spare both. And if one of them is left alive, he becomes a recurring enemy across the rest of the game and gradually develops from comic relief into a genuine threat because he’s gone mad from grief. And then in the final battle you could get an instant kill on him if you fight him with the monster that was once his friend. He just falls down crying and lets himself be taken so that he can see him again. THIS WAS WHAT I DREAMED ABOUT LAST NIGHT I KNOW I OFTEN ASK FOR SEQUELS TO MY DREAMS BUT THAT ONE WAS REALLY UNFAIR YO

* Tho I was also thinking that maybe in a golden ending you’d be able to restore the humanity of everyone you’d ever taken, at the cost of sacrificing your life. It’d be super depressing because lil girl assistant is the only one who ever knew you existed, and she’ll never be able to adjust back to a normal life knowing that you’re gone. And as far as everyone else knows you were just pure evil :( But i mean on the positive side you get to see grumpy guard and cheery guard all back to normal and like “wait why do i feel like i confessed my love to you while I was asleep, what happened”. And Then They Lived Happily Ever After

* Tho also i was thinking it’d be interesting and kind of a sequel hook if all the generals retained their powers even after being cured. Like they get their sentience back but theyre like.. were-dragons now. Thats one thing I think could actually work better in a modern day setting! Like, even after the whole thing is over, the government rounds up all the victims and experiments on them to try and discover more about the virus. “Hey please report to your local doctor for purely non sinister checkups�� So were-dragon guard boyfriends have to go on the run from a shadowy government conspiracy that’s gained way too much power in the wake of this disaster. And maybe the villain in the sequel could be the government synthesizing a clone of the virus or something, and the original virus somehow comes back to fight it?

* I DUNNO LOL i just know it would be cute to imagine a were dragon wedding HOW DID THIS CONVERSATION GO FROM ZOMBIES TO END UP HERE

[verdigrisprowl]

Apr 18 Blurr’s Horror Stream - The Similars

It was like a really long Twilight Zone episode, in Spanish.

Welcome to the 'speedxstealer' room. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He thought you might like to see yourself as he knows your kind.]] B l u r r: / wrinkles nasal / Gratitude? ItsyBitsySpyers: *A quiet point in Rumble and Frenzy's directions.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[For -their- gifts.]] B l u r r: Ah, well. No need to thank me for that. B l u r r: I like your little squadron ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Then for safeguarding Frenzy.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Either way, you are welcome to keep it.]] B l u r r: ... Well, thanks, Soundwave. /flicks finials / ItsyBitsySpyers: *Small nod.* B l u r r: / smirks and looks to his left/ We'll watch it later. /mumbles and walks to his couch / B l u r r: Looks like it's you and us tonight, mech. /points to Soundwave and co. / ItsyBitsySpyers: [[That's fine.]] B l u r r: / nods and settles./ You should let me know what else your mechs like. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Considers this* FakeProwl: *wow, he didn't miss any* B l u r r: Hey, Rumble. B l u r r: Question. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He lives with a hunter, an artist, a fighter, a... construction mech, a fuel hound, someone who likes anything simple and happy, and one who likes puzzles and games.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *Decides it's not his place to tell Blurr that Rumble writes.* B l u r r: / nods and takes mental notes / ItsyBitsySpyers: //Hmm?//' Looks up from the book. //Yeah?// ItsyBitsySpyers: *And Soundwave pings Prowl hello.* B l u r r: / chin claws / Who would you be in the great American Musical, hn? Are you more a Hamilton? FakeProwl: *pings back. sits with Soundwave* B l u r r: / wave at prowl / B l u r r: [[ lemme know when yall are ready ]] ItsyBitsySpyers: //Oh. -Oh.- Um. I mean...// He's suddenly rather awkward, no? //I - I dunno. I ain't a human.// ItsyBitsySpyers: ((ready when you two are)) B l u r r: Oh, come on. Personality wise? ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soft or hard light today?* FakeProwl: *there's nobody here to hotspot off of. unless Blurr's on Cybertron, it's soft light.* ItsyBitsySpyers: *He scratches his head a little.* //I dunno. I like the whole - y'know, them whole four in the start.// ItsyBitsySpyers: *And in that case, Soundwave will be careful not to swipe his arm through Prowl's avatar while rearranging himself for comfort's sake. Bad habit otherwise. Mustn't develop that.* B l u r r: Yeah? /leans back in his seat/ I don't know. I think I would be more... Lafayette. /wiggles claw/ Little bit of Hamilton. B l u r r: More Lafayette. ItsyBitsySpyers: //Heh. Ya got the ships.// B l u r r: And guns. FakeProwl: ((ready when you are)) B l u r r: [[ cool ]] B l u r r: [[ btw i am not sure if this movie is in english lmfao ]] B l u r r: [[ I don't think it is ]] B l u r r: [[ EITHER WAYm SUBS IS FINE ?? ]] ItsyBitsySpyers: ((unexpected but fine)) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((puff u can practice ur spanish) FakeProwl: ((apparently lol)) B l u r r: [[ sorry. ]] ItsyBitsySpyers: ((np!)) FakeProwl: ((it's fine)) B l u r r: In any case, if you want other things from Earth, let me know. B l u r r: *you guys B l u r r: I frequent the planet often. ItsyBitsySpyers: //Yeah, I will ItsyBitsySpyers: ! Honest!// ItsyBitsySpyers: *Zori crawls up onto the couch on Soundwave's other side and buries his face in Soundwave's arm. So much rain and thunder!* FakeProwl: *glances curiously at Zori, then back at the movie* B l u r r: /crosses arms and tilts helm at the movie / ItsyBitsySpyers: @P: (txt): Acid rain feared. FakeProwl: @Soundwave «Is it common on your Cybertron?» B l u r r: / flicks finials / B l u r r: I always had a soft spot for Earth's many languages. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[As does he.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Not yet. Other ally's. Stories heard. B l u r r: This language sounds a lot like what they spoke in various parts of Iacon back home. B l u r r: Well, when Iacon was alive. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Do you have recordings of it?]] B l u r r: Of Iacon? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[And of its inhabitants speaking.]] B l u r r: Well, /I/ speak it. B l u r r: But, I'm sure I have some recordings somewhere. /looks to his left/ I remember you taking some on that trip- yes, you remember. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Stares a little harder at Blurr. What was...?* ItsyBitsySpyers: *Tiny helm shake. Glances back at screen.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[When you have the opportunity to look. You need not trouble yourself right now.]] FakeProwl: (("I don't think now is the best time to bring a baby into the world." "Well thanks for that suggestion, I'll go eight months in the past and let myself know.")) ItsyBitsySpyers: ((LOL)) B l u r r: [[ LOL ]] B l u r r: Well, I'm sure we have it. /shifts and vents/ Dodge says he'll help me look after the movie ItsyBitsySpyers: *That makes two who have fallen and shaken. Is there a plague?* FakeProwl: Asking her if this has happened before WHILE it's happening seems ineffective. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Again? Interesting. He'll listen to Blurr's thoughts a little closer than usual for now.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Thank you, Dodge.]] B l u r r: / flicks finials and waves a claw/ He says you're welcome. ItsyBitsySpyers: \\THIS GONNA BE ZOMBIES?\\ B l u r r: I don't know about zombies... FakeProwl: Why were they so alarmed about hair growing on a human's face? That's normal, isn't it? B l u r r: Zombies would be up by now. FakeProwl: The seizure isn't, obviously. But hair is. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He does not know. They grow hair many places. He sees no reason for alarm.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...Beyond the contagion.]] FakeProwl: ... I think the mother is more of a problem than the child. Drugging him for speaking. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Agreed.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: //...I'm seein' scrap. How's the same human in all them places?// B l u r r: I'm confused. /tilts helm/ FakeProwl: ... Maybe it happened to him first. FakeProwl: Has he looked at himself in a mirror lately? Maybe he doesn't know. FakeProwl: ... Has he given any indication yet that he realizes they look like himself? FakeProwl: Obviously he can see they've changed, but does he know they've changed into HIM? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...He does seem confused by why they think he did something.]] B l u r r: I'm confused as all frag... FakeProwl: ... That seems like an extreme reaction. B l u r r: / looks to his left, then right / Are you guys confused? - Well, don't look at me! I don't have the answers. B l u r r: / looks back at the screen/ Things are clearly coming out odd. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Velocity is here?]] B l u r r: He's always here. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[And on the right?]] B l u r r: ... /tilts helm/ Velocity is to the right, yes. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...Hmm. Understood.]] B l u r r: ...How'd you know that? ItsyBitsySpyers: \\WHAT WAS ALL THAT STUFF 'BOUT MAGAZINES?\\ ItsyBitsySpyers: [[You spoke to Dodge on your left.]] A pause. [[And he can hear them.]] B l u r r: /flicks finials/ What do you mean you can hear them? FakeProwl: Ugh. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He said what he meant.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *A glance at Prowl. What? Why ugh?* FakeProwl: *a doctor finds out a child has a disorder that clearly distresses him and immediately asks to EXAMINE him.* B l u r r: ...That's odd. No one else has ever heard them before. FakeProwl: *not to help him. but out of CURIOSITY.* ItsyBitsySpyers: #acid rain! #no ItsyBitsySpyers: *Burrow burrow* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[They are not telepaths.]] FakeProwl: Show us the magazines already! ItsyBitsySpyers: \\YEAH!\\ B l u r r: True. They're not telepathic. FakeProwl: We know the magazines are important and the only reason we haven't seen them yet is because nobody's listening to the only sensible character. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...If it is acid rain, why is the canine outside alive?]] FakeProwl: It's not acid rain. On the radio one person asked if those rumors are true and the expert denied it. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Ah. He missed that.]] He was thinking about Blurr's companions. FakeProwl: For primussake. FakeProwl: Why doesn't she just TELL them what's in the stupid magazines. FakeProwl: This is the most frustrating, pointless extension of suspense. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Finally.]] B l u r r: These people are being obnoxiously bland. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Most people -are-.]] B l u r r: Mm, yes. Most humans are. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Now he's just plain puzzled. How do static, existing pictures change?* FakeProwl: ... This implies that it's a hallucinogenic of some sort, rather than an actual transformation. FakeProwl: And also helps explain why that one person is so baffled. FakeProwl: *go, child. run from your drug-pumping mother. be free.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[But why would they all share the same hallucination? Why -that- hallucination?]] FakeProwl: Good question. FakeProwl: But static images are changing, and one person straight up can't see what the problem is. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...He is telekinetic at the very least.]] FakeProwl: ... Hmm. FakeProwl: ... Did the child create the rain? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[To create it on a worldwide scale...]] FakeProwl: Incredibly powerful. FakeProwl: Rain and such mutations. FakeProwl: ... Or perhaps it's already happened, and he's reversing it. FakeProwl: He said that only somebody who was truly different could see that they were all the same. Maybe he's making them different. Maybe at the start they wre already all Ulises. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Telling someone to kill someone else for their escape is not reversing it to be helpful.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[It is a game.]] FakeProwl: He could be reversing it as a game, then. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He doubts that. The mother said he was 'bad' at the restaurant.]] FakeProwl: I doubt the mother's morals. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Points to the smile.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[You doubt that?]] FakeProwl: Well, I never said he was good. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Finger tap.* [[Blurr? Your opinion?]] B l u r r: .. Hn? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Is the boy amusing himself while reversing it or is he amusing himself by causing it?]] B l u r r: Personally, we're confused. But, the boy being amused is interesting enough. FakeProwl: It could be either. I'm just proposing a possibility. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He is simply curious about personal interpretation.]] B l u r r: So, is he like. A witch or something? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Or something.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[You were right.]] FakeProwl: ... He's dying. Is this really the time to show him what he looks like? B l u r r: Well, he's dying. B l u r r: He may as well know. FakeProwl: Stress can kill him faster. FakeProwl: This begs the question of whose face IS the boy replicating. I'd suspect his father—but then his mother would have realized earlier. B l u r r: Maybe it's someone only he knows. FakeProwl: All in all, this isn't the worst game he could possibly be playing. FakeProwl: I mean. He killed a man. But outside of that, all he's done is give everyone the same face. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[You forget the rest of the world.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[The announcer was begging someone to leave her alone.]] FakeProwl: So the rest of the world has the same face. B l u r r: If she has that parasite, do you think it'll look like that guy? FakeProwl: Yes, she was begging to be left alone. I don't know why. That doesn't fit with the rest of this so far. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[If these eight were panicking, it follows that others must have.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *Frenzy snickers at Blurr* B l u r r: / smirks / B l u r r: Oh, there it goes. Parasite. FakeProwl: Panic aside. Giving everyone the same face isn't the worst possibility. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[What would be?]] FakeProwl: ... Instant death? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...He will give you that.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *Frenzy throws a snack at Blurr. Looks like Blurr was right too.* B l u r r: / flicks finials/ Hn? /throws the snack back/ What? K-Kyeheheheh. FakeProwl: Or a murderous rage, maybe. B l u r r: So, the little cretin can control his surroundings and people? B l u r r: So, if it's all a game to him, he's playing it rather dully. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Primus.]] FakeProwl: PFF— FakeProwl: *claps hand over mouth* ItsyBitsySpyers: =Ugh.= B l u r r: Wait, why save him... FakeProwl: How do you know she's saving him? Maybe she's reciting prayers for the dead. B l u r r: Well, that's pointless. B l u r r: Hes dead. Toss the body and move on. FakeProwl: ... If nobody else remembers or sees it then effectively nothing has changed. Except for the panicked consequences of the night before. FakeProwl: And he's probably learned an important lesson about playing games. FakeProwl: ... Or perhaps not. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Very strange. But interesting.]] B l u r r: More or less... ItsyBitsySpyers: *Small stretch.* B l u r r: Even so, I think it was all strange enough to watch again sometime. /scratches helm. B l u r r: */ ItsyBitsySpyers: [[A second viewing may make more sense.]] B l u r r: It's possible. B l u r r: / dims optic and shifts in his spot. Snickers and stretches out/ ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Regardless, it is good to know we do not have any outliers with reality warping abilities... for now.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[The Well does what it does.]] B l u r r: I mean, honestly... B l u r r: Terminus is about as fragged as it gets. FakeProwl: How would we know if we did. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He would have heard them thinking about their actions. Maybe.]] B l u r r: My reality is alread fragmented, I wouldn't be surprised if I was living in a different setting. /snickers/  Velocity gets it. FakeProwl: Unless you didn't cross paths with them. FakeProwl: Or their powers also shielded their true thoughts from you. ItsyBitsySpyers: \\MAYBE YA OUGHTA CHECK. Y'KNOW. CENSUS IT UP. "YA EVER THOUGHT 'BOUT MAKIN' EVERYBODY LOOK LIKE SMOKESCREEN?"\\ ItsyBitsySpyers: //Ew.// B l u r r: ... Ew. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Something about the thought of a reality warper who can hide from his telepathy unnerves him a bit. He fidgets slightly.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Well. As he said... for now.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Feel free to tell him if you're hiding that power from him.]] FakeProwl: Hm. The human child modeled the new human faces on a useless hunk of junk that has plastic instead of a brain. FakeProwl: Our equivalent WOULD choose Smokescreen. B l u r r: Honeestly, I don't think I'd like to read minds. ItsyBitsySpyers: \\HA!\\ ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Oh? Why?]] B l u r r: Mine is already busy. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[It is.]] B l u r r: Mm... B l u r r: It's not that busy to /me/ B l u r r: but I suppose it sounds busy. B l u r r: I just have a lot on my mind at all times ItsyBitsySpyers: [[It is busier than most.]] Shortly after, he sends Prowl (txt): Amused. B l u r r: So they say. /motions to both sides of him/ But, it's nice not having to completely translate for them. K-Kyeheheheh. FakeProwl: *acknowledging ping. he got one laugh and one amused. the joke was Successful.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He does not mind the additions. Usually. They provide clarity he has never found elsewhere.]] B l u r r: ... How so? FakeProwl: *isn't sure what they're talking about. since it apparently involves the content of Blurr's head, figures it would be rude to ask.* FakeProwl: *that's not stopping him from listening in.* B l u r r: I mean, honestly, a lot of mechs don't believe me when I talk to them. But, it's interesting to know they're...audible to you. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[In general? He knows when he is being watched or overheard. He knows the feeling of a crowd before anyone speaks.-- ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He knows when others are lying, and when he has found weaknesses, and... there were moments when things made -sense-. --]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...But those are unimportant. Tonight? He has finally introduced himself to Dodge and Velocity. That is the most recent incident.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[You do talk to them. Of that, he is certain. You may say so, if asked.]] B l u r r: Mm... /tilts helm/ I find it interesting. So do they. B l u r r: / they're both talking at the same time while Blurr is / I wonder what it's like to hear them from the outside.. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[They... echo.]] B l u r r: Do they? ItsyBitsySpyers: *Is dead certain Prowl is listening, but Blurr's not complaining, so.* B l u r r: They sound solid to me. FakeProwl: *well of course Prowl's listening. He's still here, isn't he?* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[No doubt something is lost in translation. You and Prowl are unlikely to hear the same vocal interpretation of his thoughts. What Prowl's voice sounds like to him is different from what we hear.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Why should they be different?]] B l u r r: /flicks finials. Dodge is trying to size Soundwave up personally / B l u r r: I'm not sure. I hear them one way and only one way. I've never been told B l u r r: that someone else hears them, too. B l u r r: I wonder if they sound like I hear them... ItsyBitsySpyers: [[That is something he cannot tell you without more than a skim.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[And he is not prepared to do that at this time.]] FakeProwl: ... Is it? *what does Prowl's voice sound to other people. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Of course. The vibrations from the vocalization device in your frame travel through you in ways Blurr's cannot, never mind the position of your audio receptors compared to ours.]] B l u r r: I just wonder if you hear Dodge's accent. Or that grind in Velocity's voice. B l u r r: / chin claws/ That means you could talk to all three of us. You now understand that when you talk to me, you're talking to three. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He does.]] FakeProwl: Oh. I knew about that one already. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[No. No grind or accent.]] B l u r r: Odd.. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[But as he said... imprecise 'vocalization'.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...He does wonder what voice each of you have assigned him.]] B l u r r: Ah well. /smirks/ Sounds like you can tell the differences. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Nod.* B l u r r: Honestly, you don't sound like my Soundwave, and that's better than anything I could ever ask for. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He has heard Soundwaves like yours. It pleases him to know that.]] B l u r r: Ugh, trust me, if I could trade you two, I would. B l u r r: Soundwave caused nothing but problems for us. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[No.]] FakeProwl: ... You sound like mine. *even though Prowl has heard an alternate of this Soundwave speak before.* FakeProwl: *admittedly, it was only four words, but.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[...No. He would not trade.]] Distracts himself by looking to Prowl. (txt): Worse heard. Acceptable. B l u r r: And I like your... deployers? I like them more than my Soundwave's. B l u r r: His cassettes were annoying. ItsyBitsySpyers: *A rumble of agreement from Ravage* B l u r r: When I look at you mechs and I think of who I used to work with... B l u r r: It's a little odd. B l u r r: Sometimes the multiverse still amuses me. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[It should.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *Bobs his helm. That is probably enough distraction for the night. He should let Prowl catch up on rest and Blurr manage his fleet. There is much for them to do as well.* FakeProwl: *... okay, okay Prowl has to ask* B l u r r: Mm.. it's endearing. ItsyBitsySpyers: *Well, if it's an interesting question...* FakeProwl: @Soundwave «When you say that he does talk to them, do you mean that they're indeed separate people from him that only he can hear? Or only that he is genuinely hearing voices in his head?» FakeProwl: *he's betting on the latter but reality is strange enough that it may well be the former.* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Mixture believed. FakeProwl: *slow blink* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Soundwave hears Blurr echoes. Blurr hears separate. Blurr: comfortable. Interference unnecessary. ItsyBitsySpyers: *He sees no reason to fiddle around or mess with the status quo unless Velocity convinces Blurr to do something horrible to himself.* FakeProwl: @Soundwave «... I'm asking if they exist independently from his mind.» FakeProwl: *Prowl doesn't want to DO anything, he just wants to know their state of existence.* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Negative. Echo. FakeProwl: @Soundwave «All right. That's what I thought. ... Sort of.» ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Suggestion: Maintain previous public 'understanding'. B l u r r: / has been chatting away with his mental council / ItsyBitsySpyers: *Is filing away all he can hear, whatever that might be.* B l u r r: / it's a lot of jokes and laughing / FakeProwl: @Soundwave «... Since this is what I believed in the first place, I see no reason to change my behavior.» ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Acknowledged. What [][][]sort of[][][]? ItsyBitsySpyers: *He'll mostly pass the jokes on to the deployers later then, and not tell them where they came from.* B l u r r: / good. pass them along / B l u r r: / velocity is judging soundwave tho / FakeProwl: @Soundwave «Well, I wouldn't have termed it an "echo." But I'd expected they were audial hallucinations.» ItsyBitsySpyers: *Soundwave's been judged by everyone short of Quintessons. Bring it, Velocity.* B l u r r: [[ omg prowl. dont forget, blurr sees them too ]] ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt) Literal echo effect heard. Mental vocal translation. Telepathic interpretation sometimes... creative. B l u r r: / Velocity wants to know what's with the weird flat arms. Dodge is chastising Velocity. And Blurr is doing the same, swatting the air/ FakeProwl: @Soundwave «... Does EVERYONE'S mental voice sound echoy? Or just audial hallucinations?» ItsyBitsySpyers: *Absently.* [[His arms are this way to serve as sword, shield, and wing.]] B l u r r: See? /swats the air/ I told you that Soundwave had them for a reason! B l u r r: K-Kyehheheh. He doesn't know what to think about you. ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Few hallucinations heard nearby. Echo effect, theirs only. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He tends to have that effect. It is fine.]] B l u r r: It's all right. Eventually, they'll get used to it. /smirks/ They're not used to being heard by others. They need to keep it together. FakeProwl: *hm. interesting. why echoes?* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt) ...Prowl mental voice not Prowl audible voice. Rare. Personal habit: once heard, matched. Prowl also static crackle, unidentified rumble interruption. This, heard before deal made. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[They may ask questions if they have them. He will answer them as he does your own. It is fine.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Consider it lasting permission.]] FakeProwl: @Soundwave «... They sound different??» FakeProwl: *he doesn't hear his mental voice very often. he mainly numbers.* FakeProwl: @Soundwave «And—why static? ... Does it indicate damage?» *PROWL'S NIGHTMARE* B l u r r: /smirks/ Well, they'll ask when they have meaningful questions. B l u r r: Dodge simply doesn't trust you. B l u r r: But, don't take it so personal. He doesn't trust a lot of people. ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Slower, mild 'distance' sound. Soundwave not math-built. Belief: Translation difficulty. Static not damage; Soundwave does not possess. Interference. Similarity: rumbles. ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Note: If belief: correct, this, not minded. Natural effect. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Dodge will live longer.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: [[So to speak.]] FakeProwl: @Soundwave «Then what is it? A—bug of some kind? Somthing left behind in my head?» B l u r r: Kyeheheh. Yes, I know. Dodge just isn't sure how much he can trust you. FakeProwl: *maybe it was natural—another side-effect of being a custom job. The same thing that made him unusually resistant to computer viruses.* ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): Theory: Large someth-- someone. Followed? ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He can be trusted to do what is in line with his priorities.]] FakeProwl: @Soundwave «... Ah.» ItsyBitsySpyers: @Prowl: (txt): If Constructicons encountered, test possible. B l u r r: Yes, he knows that much. He isn't worried about you as much... Not when it comes to me. You're not threatening me. FakeProwl: *acknowledging ping* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[He has no reason to, at the moment. He would prefer it stayed that way. He is a busy mech, and threats take so much unnecessary time.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *Another stretch.* B l u r r: Well, Dodge has put up with worse. In any case /moves to stand/ My fleet has to make a move. B l u r r: We've located a boagie in the weeds. ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Then he will let you attend to it.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *Glances over to Prowl* (txt): Departure confirmed? FakeProwl: *small nod. he'd better head home and get to work.* FakeProwl: *by "get to work" he means "take a five hour nap."* ItsyBitsySpyers: *He was about to say, in asterisks.* ItsyBitsySpyers: [[Goodnight, both of you.]] To the crowd at large: [[Return. We depart.]] ItsyBitsySpyers: *AND SUDDENLY SMOTHERED and probably on his way.* FakeProwl: *disappears* B l u r r: / wave to all /

[himbocj]

Gas Station AU!

So, I work overnights at Circle K, and I was inspired to write a Gavin-centric fluff piece after a shitty night I had, which, may or may not have accidentally turned into an entire AU? Either way- here’s the first fic. Enjoy!

—————————————————-

All in all, working the night shift isn’t so bad, Gavin thinks. Especially in a convenience store as slow as the one he worked in, and with such a laid back manager. As long as the floors are swept and mopped, the day is closed out and reopened at two, and the coffee is made every morning, Hank genuinely gave no fucks about what he did. He could sit on his phone and play games, hell, even watch Netflix if he wanted. As long as the tiny store was clean and well-kept, Gavin was in the clear.

Not to mention, Connor’s hot older brother came in every single morning, so that was a plus. His sleep schedule may be a bit fucked, but it was fucked before he got this job anyway. Besides, he only worked three days a week.

Well, four, this week. Connor, on his way home a couple days previous had been pulled over. Apparently, Connor Davis was a really common name. One such Connor Davis, of fucking Vermont, had three warrants out for his arrest, and an unpaid DUI.

So, Connor, their Connor, got dragged to jail. Gavin almost laughed aloud when Tina told him. Connor, sweet, innocent Connor, got arrested? He would have paid to see that.

Hank, in a moment of desperation, had begged him to pick up one of Connor’s shifts, being the only other overnight guy. Just one, he promised, he’d take the other two. The fifty bucks he threw into the deal was pretty sweet too. Besides, it’s not like he had to twist Gavin’s arm. Not only did he need the extra hours, but, he wouldn’t pass up an opportunity to see Niles in all his glory, maybe flirt it up a little.

“Hey, Gavin.” Chris greets him as he walks in.

“Hey, Chris.” Gavin waves back at him, quickly plugging his login to the timeclock database. “No Tina tonight? I thought she was mid.”

“She was, but we switched. I’m guessing you heard what happened to Connor.”

“Yeah, pretty fuckin’ hilarious honestly. I’d’ve loved to see his face.” Gavin smirks as he sets up his phone charger. “I mean, it’s terrible and all, and I feel bad for the guy, but I would have paid good money to see that.”

“I’m pretty sure he cried.” Chris muses. “At least he sounded it when he was finally able to call Hank.”

Oh. Well. Now he just felt like a prick.

“So, I guess Hank was pretty anxious to get his shift covered today?” Chris asks.

“Yeah. Connor was released I guess, after they realized how royally they fucked up, given that the other Connor Davis is, in fact in jail. He offered to come in but Hank just told him to take it easy this week.”

“Yeah. Makes sense.”

Gavin glances at the fogged up windows as he logs into the terminal. The humidity has been a bitch, but at least that means Niles’ hair will have that nice curl by the nape of his neck. Connor, however. Hoo, boy, his hair must be as messy as his life has reportedly been the past few days.

“Nice horror movie aesthetic.” Gavin murmurs. He adjusts the nametag on his polo.

“I know right? All you can see out the windows is headlights. Fuckin’ creepy as hell.” Chris shudders. “Anyway. Hope you don’t mind if I head out a bit early. I’ve gotta be at my other job by eight tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah, go ahead, man. It’s gonna be a slow night, anyway.”

“Isn’t it always?”

“True. But like, slower than usual. No deliveries to deal with, except maybe the donut guy. It’s usually the not-creepy one on Wednesday nights, right?”

“Hell if I know.” Chris shrugs. “Anyway. Think I’m gonna grab something for Sadie and head out.” Chris busies himself with shutting his drawer down as Gavin pays in.

Slow night, indeed. Gavin resigns himself to a night of shitty phone games, maybe a few episodes of a new Netflix series.

“When’s Sadie due, anyway?” Gavin finds himself asking.

“Three weeks.”

“Holy shit. You ready to be a dad?”

“Fuck no.” Chris snorts, ringing himself out for a bag of candy on Gavin’s register. “But, at the same time, yeah? I dunno, it’s weird. Like, I’m nervous but I’m also like. Stoked as hell to finally see him, you know?” Chris sighs. “Anyway. Don’t have too much fun.”

“Yeah, no promises. You know me. I’m a regular party animal.”

“Ever the social butterfly.” Chris chuckles. “Have a good night, Gavin.” with one last wave, Chris is out the door and Gavin is alone.

***

All is well for quite a while. Gavin sits on his phone for a good hour or so. He has maybe two customers before eleven. Some kid draws a smile in the condensation on the window outside. Gavin turns the radio on for a bit of background noise.

And then, it happens.

It’s pretty damn normal for people to come in looking rough, and Gavin learned pretty quick to not judge a book by its cover. But the girl that comes in at eleven or so…well, Gavin tries his best to ignore her, even as she ambles through the store for a good twenty minutes, picking things up, putting them down, mumbling to herself. Right when he had to sweep and mop too. It takes all of his willpower to snap at her and tell her he has an actual shit to do.

“Can I help you find something ma’am?” he asks as politely as he’s able. The girl sneers at him. Furrowing his brow, Gavin turns his attention to his phone. Maybe she’s having a bad day.

Finally, finally, she walks up to the counter, placing several items down. Now, it’s only been two weeks that he’s worked for the company, but he likes to think he’s rather good on the register, given that it’s easy as hell.

“How’s your night goin’?” Gavin asks, as he scans each item. No answer.

Okay then.

“…right. Do you need a bag?”

“Yeah.” her tone is annoyingly succinct, like Gavin is the scum of the earth.

“Nine seventy six for you.” Gavin busies himself with putting the items in the bag as the girl slaps a fifty on the counter.

“I need the rest on pump five.”

“Sure thing.” Gavin nods, selects the pump number and presses the ‘rest in gas’ button. “Have a great night.” without another word, the girl briskly walks out of his store. Gavin mumbles under his breath as he puts the money away.

So this is how his night is going to go. Okay, yeah. He’ll just roll with the punches. He’s flexible.

It’s blissfully empty for a few minutes, and Gavin is actually able to sweep up some of the store. He’s almost done when the girl walks back in.

“Hello again.” Gavin calls, hurrying back behind the counter.

“I need my change back.”

“Okay, sure thi-,” Gavin stops when he notices that there’s no option to do so. “Your car took the rest of the gas.”

“But it only took thirty nine dollars out.”

“…right. Plus everything else makes an even fifty.”

“How does that make sense when my total was seven and some change?”

“Wait, what?”

“Can you reprint my receipt?”

“Um…sure…” Gavin does so, and grabs a pen.

“All this should’ve added up to only seven dollars. Ring it up again.” She pulls all her stuff out of the bag, and Gavin stares in disbelief for a second before sighing and doing as she asked. He doesn't have time for this. There’s another customer waiting in line.

“Right, so, it’s nine seventy six. Plus the thirty nine seventy five on the pump.”

“You rang it up wrong. It’s simple math, honey.”

Ooh. Yeah. No. Not today. Gavin can’t handle condescension at the best of times.

“I’d appreciate a little less attitude, ma’am.” He bites out.

“You’re the one who did it, not me!” she snaps back.

“Okay, look right here on the receipt-,” before Gavin can show her the forty nine dollars and fifty one cents that was her subtotal, and the forty nine cents that was her tax, which equals fifty fucking dollars, the lady snatches her receipt back.

“I don’t have time for this, I have to get to work. I’m gonna call corporate, you’re refusing to give me my money back.”

Oh, great. The corporate excuse. Not to mention, she wouldn’t be late for work if she didn’t wander around the store for twenty fucking minutes!

“Jesus Christ, take your three fucking dollars.” Gavin opens his drawer, yanks the three dollars out and hands them over, hands shaking. “You have a wonderful night.” he drives his point home by slamming his register shut.

Okay, so, maybe he should’ve handled that better but Jesus Christ.

Gavin smiles as much as he can at the next customer, only managing a thin, sickly sweet looking curve to his lips.

“Sorry about tha-,”

“I should have two dollars off on this.” the man slams two energy drinks down on the counter.

All-fucking-righty then.

Gavin nods, rings up the two drinks. Strangely enough, the discount doesn’t show up.

And Gavin doesn’t know how to put it on manually. Furrowing his brow, he gets up on his tiptoes to try and check the sign.

“How much is it?” the man all but demands.

“Well, right now it’s five dollars and some change, but-,”

“Five dollars?” the man all but shouts. “For two energy drinks? And that’s with the discount?”

“Well, it’s not on there yet. It should have gone on there automatically, so I’m trying to figure out-.”

“Then why does it say buy two and get two dollars off!?”

“I don’t know sir, it might be part of our rewards program-,”

“It doesn’t say that on the sign.”

If this dude interrupts him one more time.

“I’m trying to figure it out for you, sir.”

“You need to take that sign down, it’s misleading.” the man’s voice is steadily rising in volume. Gavin takes a good look at him. Middle aged, well dressed, absolutely oozing privilege. Figures. The guy probably hasn’t worked a day of customer service in his life.

“I’ll let my manager know tomorrow that-,”

“No, take it down right now.” there he goes again.

“Are you kidding me.” Gavin deadpans.

“Where’s your manager?”

“I’m the only one in the store right now, my manager comes in at six in the morning.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

Gavin purses his lips. “I’ll go take it down right now.” he tells the man.

“Put these back while you’re at it.” the man shoves the cans back at him and storms out of the store.

“Fucking wow!” Gavin shouts as soon as the door closes. He grabs the two cans, storms over to the cooler, and shoves them back in, hands still trembling. He storms back over to the door, checking to see if anybody is in his parking lot. No sign of the two assholes. Good. He locks the door, and just as he does, the angry tears start falling, rapidly.

Gavin storms into the bathroom. The urge to punch something is severe. His hands are still shaking, and he’s still crying angry tears. God, he hates that about himself. He always cries when he’s angry, which makes him even angrier, which makes him cry harder. It’s a vicious cycle.

Gavin crouches, hands gripping his hair as he tries to get a hold of himself. It takes a minute or two to calm down, but he gets there. He fixes his hair in the mirror, wipes his face down with wet paper towels, and goes to unlock the door.

His hands still tremble lightly, but he thinks he’ll be okay. He rubs his hands over his face and takes a deep breath, leaning against the counter. He steels himself when the door opens again, ready to face another asshole.

“Hey there- oh! Hey, Niles.” Gavin furrows his brow as steel grey eyes meet his. “Not that I’m not happy to see my favorite regular, but what are you doing here so early? Or, well, late, I guess, for you.” a ghost of a smile passes over Niles’ lips.

“Connor asked me to check on you. He forgot to tell you about the drug addict that comes in every Wednesday and kicks up a fuss about nonexistent change.”

Oh, yeah. That made sense.

“Yeah, she uh.” Gavin clears his throat. “She was interesting.”

“Oof. Already met her, huh?” Niles’ gives him a sympathetic look. “Connor tells me she can be a downright nightmare.”

“That’s one way of putting it.” Gavin goes for casual, but the crack in his voice gives him away. Niles furrows his brow, steps closer to the counter.

“You alright, Gavin?”

“Oh, me? I’m peachy. After the tweaker came your classic middle aged white man, so that’s great. Also, the windows are fogged so like, I’ve got the horror movie aspect too.” his attempt at a joke is weak at best, voice quavering pathetically. “It’s fine, everything���s fine.”

Everything is not fine.

Gavin opens his mouth to say something more but only manages a pathetic soundle garble.

And just like that, he’s losing his shit again.

“Fuck, sorry, I’m not- it’s not-,” he slams one hand down on the counter, the other moving up to viciously wipe his eyes.

“Gavin.” Suddenly, there’s a warm hand on his. Gavin startles, gaze snapping back up to Niles. He’s smiling, a proper, warm and comforting smile. “It’s okay. Come here.” he gestures Gavin over. He hesitates for a brief moment, before throwing caution to the wind and making his way out from behind the counter. As soon as he’s close enough, he’s gently pulled into a tight hug.

Normally, he doesn’t like to be held like this, even when he’s crying. But…it feels nice, Niles holding him, rubbing soothing circles into his back. It’s totally unprofessional, but fuck it. He allows himself to cry again, and he allows himself to be calmed and soothed by the man holding him.

“Wanna step outside with me for a minute, get some air? The parking lot is empty, so you don’t have to worry about getting customers.” he should hate the softness in Niles’ voice, but he finds he rather doesn’t. He nods, finally pulling himself together.

“Thank you.” he whispers. Niles rubs his back one last times as he pulls away, gesturing towards the door.

Patting his pocket for his cigarettes, Gavin steps out into the humid air, Niles not too far behind him. He lights a smoke, inhaling deeply, relaxing immediately. Niles is quiet beside him, and he’s grateful for that.

A sudden noise from the roof has him flinching suddenly, grabbing onto Niles’ arm. Niles lets out a soft chuckle.

“Relax, Gavin. It’s just the building settling.”

“Right. Sorry.”

“It’s quite alright.”

Gavin all but inhales his cigarette, stamping it out underneath his shoe when he’s done.

“Feel better?” Niles asks.

“Yeah.” Gavin nods. “A lot. Thank you, I…I really appreciate it.”

“Don’t mention it.”

And then Niles does something unexpected. He leans down, and presses a kiss to Gavin’s head.

“Goodnight, Gavin. Hope it gets better for you.”

Niles leaves him there, all but sputtering. He refuses to admit that he’s blushing furiously.

***

Connor stops in right before Gavin’s shift ends to grab a coffee, waves hello to Hank and Gavin in turn.

“Heard you met my friend last night.” Connor says, smile sympathetic. “I’m sorry, I totally forgot to warn you about her. She’s…interesting.”

“An understatement.” Hank grouses.

“Yeah, well, you spent a night in jail. I think the award for ‘worst night ever’ goes to you.” Gavin shrugs as Hank hands him the “Register Closed” sign and tells him he’s good to start counting down.

“It wasn’t horrible.” Connor shrugs. “More of an inconvenience.” he’s definitely lying through his teeth. Gavin huffs out a snort as he counts out his change. “Oh! Niles asked me to give you this. He told me you had kind of a rough night.”

When Gavin looks up, Connor is handing him a piece of paper.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t read it.” Connor winks at him, the asshole, and leans over the counter to talk to Hank.

Gavin finishes counting the money, dropping it in the safe when he’s done. Only after he’s logged out does he open the note.

On it, in neat handwriting is a number, along with:

Sorry I couldn’t come in this morning, I had things to take care of.  I hope you’re feeling better though.

Oh, and, let me know if you’d like to hang out sometime when you don’t have to work. I find that I rather enjoy your company, Gavin.

-Niles

Gavin is not blushing, he’s not.

But there’s no way he can fool himself.

[tumblunni]

ALSO TO FIX EXCELLUS

Because tangeants again lol

Recognise that its fuckin stupid and bigoted to expect us to believe someone is a villain INSTANTLY after seeing that they're queer, before they even do anything. Don't spend your entire damn game having the characters go "eww its that disgusting person of ambiguous gender we should kill them because gross" rather than.. Yknow.. "Excellus fuckin murdered those people". Recognise that literally doing this is gonna make your character LESS villainous and MORE sympathetic long before you finally get to goddamn showing them do anything bad except say "ohoho i wanna be a princess". And it'll make bunni REALLY PISSED OFF because nobody wants to feel sad for an asshole murderer yet THAT SADNESS IS FOREVER ENGRAINED IN MY SOUL NOW

Seriously fuckin hell it even made the heroes look less heroic! I felt like Excellus was almost justified in becoming a murdering selfish monster if she spent her entire life being treated that way by both sides in this big good or evil conflict. Why the fuck should she give a shit if she's being degraded? Like FUCKIN OBVIOUSLY murdering people and wanting to conquer a random japanese country as a mad dictator is not a remotely logical reaction to being misgendered. But like they could have changed some stuff and made a perfectly good sympathetic villain who gets manipulated by the bigger bad because of her sad past of being treated like shit and like she feels like this is her only option to be herself. And then maybe you can reignite her hope in the world and her self esteem and moral centre and help her redeem herself and team up with you to take out the real horrible fucks with no sympathetic motives. Instead she's friggin played as THE one who's evil cos she has no sympathetic motive. Like that's her whole Thing, she's supposed to just be selfish and greedy and horrid. Your damn bigotry somehow failed your own story as well as failing all trans people ever!

Or like yknow.. If you want an asshole fuckboi then actually write an asshole fuckboi. Scrubby scrub the trans = bad shit from this plotline and you do indeed have a selfish monster who murders a bunch of innocent people and gets his just desserts. You had a ready made simple character archetype and you were so preoccupied shoving your transphobic screed into your game that you fucked it up!

So yeah i think either make this goofy ohoho trans auntie a good character, make the asshole ohoho bad character a cis man, do both at once, or like even i'm not opposed to having a trans villain exist but like seriously make them a synpathetic villain. If they're the only trans character in the plot its already gonna send a bad message if theyre in the role of "worst most underhanded jerk villain", even if it WASNT also transphobic as fuck. So a sympathic trans villain or adding more LGBT characters so it doesnt seem like this one individual was designed to make a statement on your entire feelings for a minority.

ALSO

like seriously please do not do this stupid thing of mooshing every stereotype together from every LGBT identity and acting like theyre all the same thing?? Like man i fuckin HATE that anime trope that yknow.. The gay man says all this trans stuff cos he's ~just that flambouyant~ Like being a drag queen is what 100% of gay men are, 24/7, and anyone saying theyre a trans woman is just one of those drag queens who's really getting into character. Or just.. I dunno. I cant even wrap my head around what train of logic must have led to that stereotype in the first place! And its so fuckin annoying as a queer person trying to talk about why this is bad queer stereotyping, it just makes me extra sad to straight up not know what pronouns to use for the character so i feel like i'm being just as horrible to them as their creators were. Like man i've only settled on going for "she" for Excellus cos after years of looking into it it does seem like the original japanese was indeed specifically using stereotypes of trans women and not trans men or nonbinary people. Though all languages do seem to call the character male it seems pretty strongly to be a "i believe that trans women are men and can never be women" kind of thing, rathe rthan the character herself calling HERSELF male. She calls herself a woman in both english and japanese, and its just that the english has everyone else use male pronouns for her and added the non-canon "explanation" that she only acts like a trans woman because she has something wrong with her balls. (Ugh!) And in japanese on top of calling herself a woman she also uses feminine (and specifically trans/drag queen coded) variants of "I", and other common speech pattern traits used for negative stereotypes of trans women. Though again we do have other characters calling her a disgusting perverted man instead. Sigh!

Ok ok ALSO BIGGEST FUCKIN FIX! dont draw the character like a horrible distorted cariacature goblin in an entirely different art style to everyone else. Seriously its so annoying how they tried to make you agree with "excellus is disgusting just for acting queer" by LITERALLY DRAWING A DISGUSTING CHARACTER. If you take away the weirdass overdetailed horror movie monster face, there is nothing ugly or even "manly looking" about her! She's just like somebody's perfectly normal chubby aunt or something. You could go out in any street all over the world and see five of her! I hate it cos its almost like psychological manipulation or something? Like i've seen so many lets players who arent bigoted but merely oblivious still agree that excellus is ugly and disgusting and comical because of it, cos all the implications of transphobia/homophobia flew over their heads and all they saw was a character drawn to look monsterous. And just.. This is so common. Its the overwhelming japanese stereotype of trans women. Draw them looking INFINATELY MORE MANLY than the cis male characters. So manly that it really hammers home how "obvious" it is that a man in lipstick or dresses "just looks wrong" and of course there's NO way they could ever pass and ha ha look how deluded they are that they think they look pretty. It's horrid. It really is. Seriously I like to point at Tabitha from Pokemon ORAS for a good counter example, cos he's also an ambiguously transgender character from a game that came out around the same time and by some weird coincidence they look very similar. Except for the literal entire face. The literal entire exact same face, just its drawn hideous and distorted on the one who's supposed to be a negative trans stereotype, and drawn exactly like everyone else on the positive one. And there's not one example in the whole game of anyone calling Tabitha ugly because he looks trans, or even insulting his weight or anything. Same damn character design, just drawn without bias and treated like a human being. I mean seriously right down to them having the small "evil eyes" but with Tabitha he's always drawn with them in a perpetual sort of happy face and then his pose with them looking similar to Excellus is supposed to be a BADASS MOMENT of this comic relief villain showing his worth! And hw literally has red eyes on top of it! His design is even MORE "evil" yet just not drawing it as a stereotype entirely changes the player's perception and he became beloved by many. Whereas with Excellus even the trans people in the audience couldnt relate to her and just felt fuckin sad.

Oh also i guess Excellus is implied to be a trans woman and Tabitha is implied to be a trans man? But i don't think game freak was trying to say anything about trans men being more valid or whatever, cos the first canonical LGBT character of any sort was a trans woman npc in the battle maison. And tabitha being trans isnt really confirmed as clearly as she was. i hope someday theyre able to confirm an LGBT main cast member but until then i will forever hold onto the glimmer of hope that was given to me by Beauty Nova.

Also seriously Tabitha and Excellus both also look EXACTLY LIKE ME IN REAL LIFE so I kinda took Excellus extra hard and latched onto the Tabitha headcanon so much more because it was good healing after all that nonsense. Tho I also did considee nonbinary Tabitha at the time, because his japanese name is a gender neutral one that's merely like 75% female, rather than a 100% feminine one. But then his old RSE design was very masculine so i think maybe a trans man is what they were trying to imply if they did indeed do it on purpose. Anyway i probably would have translated his name as Ashley cos it has the same "technically neutral but more popular with girls" aesthetic while also keeping the same fire pun as Homura. I have no idea how on earth Tabitha is supposed to be a joke, honestly. Tho i meam maybe he's just the one type specialist on the entire poke-earth who doesnt have a joke name?

ANYWAY thank you terrible transphobic stupid manga i read today for reminding me that i love Tabitha. And also the developers love Tabitha. And also all the characters in universe love him, like seriously the only difference between the devon dialogue of him and Shelly is that they mention the other scientists nicknamed him tabitabi. And its so cute how seriously they said it too?? Its like "our boss tabitabi,the most feared and respected genius man".

Lovv dat tabb