#down with the fucking monarchy dude!!!!

[spearxwind]

Fuck vlaakith all my homies hate vlaakith

[ew-selfish-art]

Dpxdc AU: consultant groups can be used to outsource problems for companies so why not monarchies?

Danny is listening to the various eyeballs and ghosts chatter on about all the issues that he now has to oversee and advise and make so many freaking decisions on. It’s annoying that it all has to come down to his call because he was a dumb 14 year old who didn’t want his town to permanently live in the ghost zone.

Now 17, King of the Infinite, and a bit wiser to the world, Danny is doing his best to balance his teenage ambitions to not give a shit and his protective obsession to very much give a shit.

Sams parents are making her learn the family business and Tucker is trying to make this internship he’s got with a fancy tech company out of New Jersey into a career without college… so while they’re commiserating with Danny the idea comes up.

Earth has a shit ton of heroes. Like, ever since the Justice League *poofed* the GIW out of existence with the Meta human acts- more and more caped crusaders seemed to be coming out of the wood work. More villains too but still, more people who seemed wise to their abilities and morals. Danny has literally never taken an ethics class.

But rn, Eye-mothy and Eye-Bert are arguing over how Danny as King Phantom is supposed to tackle the problem of some fucking pool acting as a weird trade route with a cult and… ugh it’s just so boring but like also such a fucking problem. But… maybe it can be someone else’s issue.

Opening a portal, Danny escapes into space and gets to work finding the base of operations- Tucker had told him there was a new satellite after all and there’s no way it wasn’t connected to the hero orgs- and boom he flies into the Watchtower.

“Hey- are any of you guys willing to consult on some weird pools of ectoplasm in Pakistan? Green and glowing little lakes of bullshit and magic?” Danny asks into the meeting room of the JL regardless of their startled and alarmed exclamations.

“… I could consult on that.” A voice comes from the corner, and Danny recognizes him as one of the bat people. Or bird? The guy is in a lot of red and clearly wasn’t supposed to be in this meeting based on the way he’s propped in the corner. The room erupts in protest but Danny barely hears them through his excitement and focus on the dude.

“Great! I’ll have him back before the end of the day! Lets go Bird boy!” And with that, Danny grabbed the Bird, chucked them both through a portal back into his thrown room and begins to explain the way these eyeballs are totally trying to trap him into doing more work than he needs to do.

“What do I call you by the way? I’m Danny but you’ll probably hear them call me King Phantom.”

“I go by Red Robin, and honestly, I’ve been trying to get this shit taken care of for years.”

From there Tim becomes a regular consultant for King Phantom- the Bat Family is losing their minds with him constantly going to the land of the dead but also Constantine said not to piss off the king at all costs.

Danny is just thrilled that this dude has a shit ton of insight as well as business sense- like he could legit run the monarchy way better than him despite the fact that they’re the same age.

They end up working together for years, and even when there’s not an active issue at hand, Danny will meet up with the bird just to talk.

Sam and Tucker think they’re hilarious each time they ask if Danny’s proposed yet.

Tim has already planned their wedding but all of that information is in a folder more secured than the nuclear codes- Danny needs to ask him on a date first.

[inkskinned]

"it's so embarrassing you like that popular thing" "oh ew that geeky/strange thing is so cringe lol" "oh it's kind of weird you get excited about that harmless shit"

dude i love how ironic and jaded you are and that's so cool and sexy of you. and i am so so glad to tell you - you won!! we all had a meeting and we decided that you won, and we are writing your name on the inside of a burger king crown. the marker smeared, sorry, but we knew any form of real effort is ugly to you. but anyway. congrats! you are officially the coolest, most ironic, most jaded person in-the-world-right-now. we would throw you a party but you would think it was totally boring - and besides, we're weird so we wouldn't have been coming. we would have brought our love of beetles and of baking and of little canapes. we would have brought our artsy videogames and pages of writing. we would have written a poem with you, our hands covered in ink, and spread out a canvas to dance on, the night so lurid and pink.

but do not worry. we will not throw the party. we will just get you a ringlight and that crown i mentioned. it is a nice crown, except for where one of us dropped it.

the vote was a really hard one because we had so many cool ironic people to pick off the shelves. all of you have hands that rot fruit, how strange is that - you can't look at something without destroying it for other people. you like it when you can squeeze a person into a pinpoint - all us small ones scampering our little feet around our ugly joys. the vote was also a hard one because we kept our voices down because you don't like it when we talk too loud. you were on your phone at the time, talking to people other than us. you are a ghoul of every moment - half in, half out, you resent us for being here without shame or embarrassment.

so good news! we have invented an island for people like you. you get to go there and speak into the air things like if you still like watching harmless twitch streamers in 2023 you're fucking boring. you will say things like liveplay podcasts are fucking ugly and it's kind of awkward they try to make everything gay. on the island we made you, all of your words will have weight. they will form in the air like icicles, large white behemoth letters that will crumple in anvils around your feet. maybe we will send someone there once in a while to sweep, but honestly you might be there for a while, alone, waiting. we are busy being outside looking for mushrooms and flapping our hands and humming. we are busy kicking our little heels while we watch cringey tv. we are busy - sorry! as an apology, we have pre-filled the island with every bland, mediocre, unscented thing we could find. the island has the texture of american cheese. the island has an ocean that never gets angry. the island is perfect for you, trust me. you will be so happy there - as happy as you can be, ironically.

we want to say we are sorry for doing harmless things that you find annoying, childish, or unappealing - but we are not sorry. we thought we could help you, because we don't mind laughing at ourselves, but it turns out you are allergic to color and noise and atmosphere, so this is the best that we can do for now. we are all making a big shirt that says i voted in the ironic monarchy. we got you one that is just a fast fashion buttondown. i am so excited for you and this island and the big life you have won. you have a cool jaded grey life and miles of irony to roam. i love you! be well.

now leave us alone.

[oceansarepink]

Stolas: Octaviaaa!

Via: dad what the hell? Is this seriously happening? Why are you here?

Stolas: you knew what you were doing when you liked your mother’s sInstagram post on the beach with her friends!! You KNOW how hard it is for me to make friends because of my enormous brilliant mind and my romantic, generous heart!!

Via: It was a good picture!

Stolas: Every month you get five likes on my sInstagram account, and five on your mothers account, you heard what judge vagina mandated!

Frat boy: Hey man sorry to interrupt, are you stolas Goetia? Wow. Great to meet you, just wanted to say, you got majorly screwed over by those damn fire toads.

Stolas: Yeah?

Frat boy: Yeah dude! Your knight dumping you in public like that for being “used” by you? He must have been brainwashed by commies! You were just fulfilling your needs. Parrot boy was giving you the eye. And word on the street is, that mouthy imp liked being your toy, hes just too mental to admit it. Filthy labourers, can’t see real honest love when it’s right in front of em. Only transactions and meal tickets. It’s not your fault. Not to mention your harpy wife and spoiled brat daughter, they totally deserved to be taught a lesson. Blue blood doesn’t have to mean blue balls right?

Stolas: Erm…

Frat boy: Nowadays society is all “consent this, monarchy that, hierarchy is bad, imps deserve rights” Pfft. Try taking that up with the people who BUILT our society. We should be THANKING the Goetia. It’s not like you asked to be born a man, gay, and whi—uh I mean, and a prince of the Goetia. Real imps like to serve, it’s what they were made for!

Stolas: Finally, someone with sense! Blitzy kept whining about getting “looked down on”, like im this prince who thinks he’s superior. Honestly he was starting to sound like some type of socialist or-or violent abolitionist lunatic. Well, strike me down just for knowing basic biology and the natural order. Would I fuck imps if I was racist? No. I don’t even know where all this talk of me being “racist” comes from, im literally gay!

Octavia: Dad you’re ruining my fucking life!

Dialogue from Bojack horseman: Horny Unicorn

[azulaaaaaaah]

atla/tlok characters that i think did *it* (but i just can’t prove it)

this is the most unserious post i’ve ever made. (AND I WANT TO PREFACE BY SAYING BY *IT* I MEAN KISSING)

Sozin and Roku

and history will say that they were just great friends…

this is the only one where ill legitimately die on this hill

like i’m 90% sure roku just showed Aang their friendship in the flashbacks to prevent awkwardly explaining to a 12 year old monk that he was romantically and/or physically involved with the person who committed a g*nocide against his people

LIKE CMON WHY IN THE WORLD WAS SOZIN SO PRESSED IN THE BACKGROUND OF ROKU’S WEDDING ??? AND FOR NO REASON?? WHY WAS THEIR FRIENDSHIP SO INTENSE?

sozin i feel loved roku (to an obsessive level) and roku literally dgaf. king shit

Wan and Raava

genuinely what the fuck was going on between these two. like i don’t even have any words

canonically at the very least it was a domestic partnership

S2 korra doesn’t make sense at the best of times. imagine trying to explain the intensity of this pair’s devotion to each other, to someone who hasn’t seen the show- all the while knowing raava is a disembodied spirit practically older than time

she’s the embodiment of everything good and light in the universe and he’s just wan. (and he’s wanough <3)

‘do you think we’re soulmates in every life?’

‘bet’

‘wait that’s not what i-‘

Cabbage Merchant and his cabbages (or at least a cabbage)

yeah i’m not touching this one with a 10 foot pole

Every member of the red lotus squad

ah yes it’s my favourite evil polycule

amidst plans to kidnap children and topple monarchies what else is there to do except… kiss.

let’s be real there’s something so inherently romantic about being apart of an elite, vaguely murderous anarchist squad

they all share one exact bed. it’s canon

(p’li somehow big spoons all of them)

The S2 Nomads

these dudes are the textbook definition of anti-monogamy

like they’re obsessed with love so i fully believe that they think ‘it should be spread amongst others’ or some shit

oh to be a travelling communist nomad in a band, wandering the wilds with my wife, and our several partners

they’re somehow the opposite of the red lotus and yet the same. they all share a single bed/sleep area

The dangerous ladies (but all separately)

i don’t ship any of these particularly and yet can still admit that it’s canon

ty-lee and azula have kissed bc azula probably made up a dumb excuse like ‘oh i don’t want my first kiss with a guy to be… erm… bad’

mai and ty-lee have kissed because they both probably have genuine, vaguely deep rooted romantic feelings for each other

mai and azula have kissed to purely spite zuko (and yknow what ty-lee too)

HOWEVER A KEY ASPECT TO THIS DYNAMIC: azula is completely unaware about the ty-lee and mai thing. it’s uh… better off that way.

Hakoda and Bato

i ship this about 50% but like… it’s got to have happened once right? considering all that down time they spent together on a boat away from the repercussions of water tribe society…

also considering they were leaders i doubt the other warriors were in a position to ever call them out on it

like cmoooooooon what’s a little kiss between the homies every now and again?

hakoda is where sokka gets his rizz/flagrant bisexuality from and i can’t change that guys

[vide0-nasties]

Going to be rambling insanely about Ghost and probably what his feelings on the monarchy would be, coming from one deeply damaged povo to another.

Anyway, specifically around the time the parasite in chief in her idiot hat (thanks Eccleston lub u) died and passed said idiot hat on, I was seeing a lot of (fun and gentle-ribbing, mind you!) posts about Ghost getting razzed about the queen croaking and maybe him being sad about it or something - I don’t really remember bc I have shit for brains and I just latch onto what bits my adhd will allow.

SO. I really don’t think Bruv Innit gave two shits about Liz buying the farm, bc he grew up working class in a working class town to a drug addicted, drug peddling dad, and a fairly nondescript mom who likely didn’t have a way to get her and her kids out of that shit situation (per ‘09 MW lore and some presumption). I imagine dude was dragged around a shitload of council estates and his dad’s friends’ shitty crash pads, no stability whatsoever, where food insecurity was a big ass forever-looming deal, mom had no idea if her 20 year old vauxhall was going to make it another trip to her minimum wage part time job, and school was forever on the back burner bc when it came to school supplies/trips vs eating and keeping the lights on. You can guess which one won.

If we’re also going with him being about 35-40ish, he would’ve been 10-12ish or so around Diana’s divorce and then her death. So, here’s this starving, horrendously abused kid, with his starving, horrendously abused mother and little brother, drowning in a system that is pretty much just letting them sink to the bottom, nothing is being done about the evil sperm donor that ruins everything for them, and he’s obliterated constantly by TV coverage and tabloids and radio DJs talking about this goddamned family’s stupid fucking drama. Charles cheated, Diana left, her poor boys in their fancy private schools with their endless wealth and glowing skin and brand new clothes that don’t stink of consignment shops are sad.

Sorrows - sorrows, prayers. 🫶

It’s a story he’s seen countless times, the only difference is money and coverage. And, realistically, the women in the stories he knows aren’t killed in car wrecks, they’re killed by their infuriated husbands who think they’re owed something catching up. Maybe that’s why his mom doesn’t leave the cocksucker that trapped her, she could’ve ended up another council house Diana that no one gave a shit about.

He grows up, becomes a butcher’s apprentice, joins the army. Straightens his brother out, makes sure his mom is set up nice, finally beats the shit out of his dad. And all the while, there looms the most fucking pointless, parasitic family in England: living off taxes taken from the public, god knows how much land and how many castles, even owning all the fucking swans on the island.

Relics, vampires, leeches.

But, you know, twenty years down the road, he’s pushing 40, his services to the country are done in the dark, the family he tried so badly to save were brutally cut down anyway, and when he goes to Tesco, the price of a fifth of piss Smirnoff is insane, and he’s still got Soap swimming in his head mid-rant bc his mam’s fucking knee replacement appeal has been denied for the third time and she can’t even walk anymore, Gaz is moving for the second time in a year bc he just can’t afford to live close to his parents even on his salary, meanwhile there was a stretch where it looked like Philip was surviving solely by being pumped full of virgin blood and straight stem cells.

So, yeah, if anything he probably said cheers when the news broke and cracked a couple extra jokes that day.

“What d’you call one dead Windsor? A good start.”

Edit: This is picking up some traction. @50cal-fullauto-astarion is my CoD blog if you like my Call of Bullshit stuff, this is my main and I don’t really go into CoD here

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

HEY WHO WANTS AN UPDATE ON MY VACATION THAT NO ONE ASKED FOR? Lmao well sucks for you this is a monarchy and I am Prince and you're getting it anyway:

1. My friends and I went down to eat breakfast. The waiter asked them what language their native tongue is, Kannada or Tulu or anything else, and before they could answer he pointed at me and said (in Kannada), "I knew this one speaks English as soon as I looked at them. With people like this I just go full butler and restrict myself to yes or no."

2. Yes I fucking got called out as a whitewashed piece of shit by a random waiter who took one look at me. The worst part is he's right. English is my first language.

3. I saw a lot of human kidneys and they were THE CUTEST THINGS EVER THERE WERE SO MANY I WAS SO HAPPY UNFORTUNATELY I COULDN'T HOLD ANY BUT AT LEAST I GOT TO LOOK AT THE CUTIES.

4. I made a lot of intense eye contact with dead babies to evade the Birds. To be fair, most of the babies had, um, closed eyes. Or no eyes. I promise I wouldn't have been making that much eye contact without the Birds. I'd have been looking at the kidneys instead. No i will not be elaborating for fear of freaking people out.

5. It was legal btw. Aside from the photo my friend took of me making the two fingered salute (like the dude smiling next to the grave meme) next to a foetus that was at least slightly demonic in origin.

6. Anyway so then I spoke to my other friend and told her how I felt (about being afraid that they didn't see me as a guy because they've known me since I was 11) and she said it wasn't that, she was just getting used to the new name and pronouns and that was all (since I only came out to her two days ago). And I hugged her.

7. My friends have all been using Asmi for me and correcting themselves with their pronouns. I love them and I want to cry.

8. I saw two men holding hands in front of me at the mall. A very careful holding of hands, delicately. But I think they saw me glance at them, because when they got on the escalator in front of me, they untangled their hands and when one reached for the other's hand again, he pulled it away, and they both carefully stayed on their phones. I don't know. Just something I'm thinking about.

9. Maybe I should take off the progress pride pin from my denim jacket and just wear it everywhere I go. Fuck blending in with the cishets I want the queers to know I exist and they're not alone.

And those were the highlights of my day <3 A totally normal vacation for real.

Have the loveliest of days my maggots I'll be back home in two days and then I'll have all my attention to annoy you with, my loves. And a social battery, which currently is dead by night because of irl interactions.

I'll sleep now. The Horrors will be occupied with me, I hope they leave you alone.

I love you 💕

[davekat-sucks]

https://www.tumblr.com/davekat-sucks/771886685189472256/iirc-meenah-in-addition-to-aranea-as-she-is-a ANON. MY BROTHER IN SUFFERER. DID YOU NOT READ THE FUCKING COMIC-? Bro, my dude, my guy, broski, the entire Beforus, for example, *is* the way it is BECAUSE OF HER IGNORANT NICENESS. Its literally the same fish Hitler, but extreme ableism edition. How can you look at the society where the disabled Latula literally has to hide her disability because otherwise she would've been coddled and cooed over by some stronger and more powerful individuals, which would absolutely destroy her mentally, and not see the extreme problem in that? Do you think that just because there's no genocide and murder it isnt a fucking horror to live in? Do you not realise how one act of her desire fucked everything over for so many others? She wasnt even on the screen and yet her rule as a, oh idk, a highest cast ever??? was still like a slap?? In the comic itself Feferi was never "too nice" 24/7. She was condesending, pushy, talked over others, hurled the same slurs that some other trolls used and enjoyed her privilege immensly, but in her "im going to be so good for everyone! eventually" way. Its literally the same way how people mischaracterize Jade as a "nice uwu girl" stop ittttttt stop stop stoooop. Yes, she's shallower than others. Yes, she's pretty boring due to minimal panel time. But her chat name is also cuttlefishCuller for a reason for fucks sake anon read with your eyes not your fucking ass. She was very giddy and naive, but she's not stupid. Girl literally talked the fucking HORRORS OF THE ELDRITCH CALIBER to blow some fucking *BUBBLES* so the dreams could help others live on. You know. Dream bubbles. The thing that later became cosmically important? Girl is a puddle on the outside and then a goddamn chasm on the inside, unintentional or not. She managed to pack all that adding up to her character even after she died and just kept serving. If *thats* a bad written and a hated character then I want more of those please

So you would agree with Hussie that she was nothing more than a JOKE character? That she would be written out to push someone else and create more filler characters instead of using existing ones? Because Latula was TOTALLY important to Openbound, of fucking course!!!1 And despite Feferi having a lot of importance with the Horrorterrors and it was her who made the Dream Bubbles happen, she doesn't play in any role towards meeting people like Dave when Dream Bubbles get introduced. It was ARADIA who took that role. Right down to Openbound since it is Aradia also guiding Meenah, not Feferi. Or can at least we agree all Peixes, Condesce, Feferi, and Meenah, just suck in general. That their privileged status made them either power-hungry crazy or ignorant to those around them and in both Pre- and Post-Scratch, still secure them to stay in that position. People can say one is better or worse than the other. In the end though, how Feferi gets pushed to the side despite her potential shows how much Andrew Hussie sucks as a writer. The final endgame of Homestuck series would to be have no fuchsiablood be reigning. No monarchies. Kind of like Wayward Vagabond's vision for no more Kings or Kingdoms. And yet look what happened by the end of Homestuck! KINGDOMS ALL AROUND!!!

[lamialamia]

Mota ep 6 rewatch thoughts

You know, when I watch sth for the first time, I'm willing to give it the benefit of doubt; the story-telling choices it make would eventually come together.

And Mota, oh boi, this show both impress and let me down in this regard. At first I was a bit annoyed by the repetition of missions and then the sequence of the interrogation room, then they do it all again next episode. Yet that pays off in episode 5 where only one plane came back from Munster and now, the interrogation room is decimated. Everyone we know is gone.

It hit me like a truck in the feels.

Then we have other storylinea that never go anywhere. Quinn and Bailey and the resistance force barely reach an emotional climax. Now, in this episode, I'm watching Crosby and Sandra starting sth that eventually lead to their extra-marital affair and whatever the fuck Sandra's storyline supposed to be. Upon this rewatch, as I know how things will play out, I can not reserve my judgement. No baby. I'm full on judging.

But let have a list, again:

I don't understand why this show hate and shit on the British so much. Oh americans are so great, we respect women, we are fun, we are a democracy while all the british are homophobic, sexist, monarchy-loving, pompous assholes, and their night bombing ruined the german civilians lives but it's the all-heroic americans who have to bear the brunt of the germans' anger.

????? i don't get it??? this show is strangely vicious re:the british

I want to repeat myself again: all Crosby and Sandra's scenes are excruciating bad to watch.

Let me talk about this here.

Well at least Rosie is as pretty as ever and I'm glad he slowly embracing therapy as well as any dudes in the 40s would be. On the other side of the world, the other Robert is also not going through a good time in therapy, and he didn't get to listen to jazz! /j

Every time Rosie is surrounded by rose pattern I love it. Gosh. Such a great look on him, so aesthetically pleasing 😍

The pause at the end before he gets back up the plane is a great moment! Let Nate Mann be pensive and then overcomes it because he's good at his job: acting!

And the crowning storyline: Bucky and his continuous suffering. He just can't get a break, physically or mentally. The interrogation scene? Still good. And Bucky's fighting spirit isn't diminished if he is in an active role: helping people, running around, facing dangers. It contrasts to his later predicament, where direct danger is no longer there (he even has Buck by his side again, and the other guys) yet it's the inaction, the helplessness, inability to fight back, the cage of being a POW that slowly destroy Bucky.

Love me a man going through it.

[momo-de-avis]

ana can you explain the liberal wars in simple terms? i visited algarve recently and the tour guide (like yours where it's mostly related to history) talked about the war between the brothers and a guy named remexido(?)

Just yesterday I told my boyfriend to please ask his coworker who graduated in history for a book on the civil war because thats the one thing I'm not good at lmao I didn't even know who Remexido was but apparently he was a guerrilla fighter from the Algarve which yay but fought on the side of Miguelistas which nay

The liberal wars was between Pedro IV of Portugal, better known as Pedro I fo Brazil, who was its first Emperor after declaring its independence, then to quote a brazilian client I had once, homeboy was a better king for the portuguese than he was an emperor for the brazilian... He basically stepped down and answered the plea from Portugal to come back here and kick his brother off the throne.

Now, his brother is Miguel I, the absolutist

Important background is that Portugal was an absolutist country thruoghout the 18th century, which means the king held absolute power. Think Louis the XIV level. Not only does the king have last say about everything government related, he works hand in hand with the church, who is below him (except the Inquisition) and he is celebrated as Godsend's. He is the centre of the universe. Its a time of extravagance, of theatricality, of excess, and the people, as you might imagine, are dirt poor.

This is essentially a kicker into the French Revolution, as you might imagine.

But with portugal, there's the Napoleon problem. Napoleon sends out General Junot to invade Portugal after successfully capturing spain, and on 1808 Junot arrives.

The Portuguese monarchy realised we did not have the arms to face off this guy, and the english, with whom we'd signed a treaty in 1387 and had always upheld it, said they were too busy fighting the french elsewhere... we needed to sort ourselves out. It was obvious by now that an invasion would be unstoppable. We did not have the navy nor the weapons to fight it off. So, the king, John VI, who by now is king because his mother, Maria I, went insane, decided to deceive Napoleon. He uprooted the government and took everyone to BRazil. He established court there and changed the name of his kingdom slightly to the kingdom of Portugal and brazil, it was something like that And then he made the capital city Rio de Janeiro. All in all he took with him about 100.000 people, nobility and court members as well as government. When Junot arrived, he was greeted by a Regency Government that basically said "step right in"

It was a way to show Junot that there was no government to overthrow and that he and his troops had been formally invited. Junot lived here until Napoleon told him to go pound sand somewhere else, and in the time he did, he fucked everyone's wife, lived in complete excess, and angered virtually everyone.

So, two more "invasions" happen, and by the third that's when Wellington and his beef come along to (this time, successfully) fend off the french.

And then, what happened was that this single event changed the country forever.

You'd be surprised to find how many in portuguese society were for Napoleon. Overall in Europe Napoleon was seen as the dude who was going to change the modern world, and it was actually accepted that he was undefeatable. When looking at the case of Portugal and Spain, most countries just went "submit bro there's no turning around". So it was a bit of a surprise that in the end backwards catholic portugal and the english won.

For example, the painter Vieira Portuense, arguably the most celebrated artists of portuguese neo-classicism and someone who met and hung out with Angelica Kauffmann, was so in favour of Napoleon not only was he arrested for it, he had to leave the country to escape persecution. There are paintings of him that originally had Napoleon's eagle hidden in it, but he had to repaint it to not offend anyone.

Basically, Napoleon offered a liberal alternative to the absolutist nightmare that was our country. Napoleon was the opposite of what Portugal was: a country ruled by a royal family who relished in absolute excess and also ruled by the church, and a country where the church held not just a monopoly on riches but controlled the country, so much so that the inquisition was still here despite the Marquis of Pombal's efforts to reduce its power. And a country that was mostly rural, ignorant, illiterate and extremely, painfully catholic. Liberals saw in Napoleon the chance to grow past this, embrace enlightenment, to evolve past catholic fervor.

These ideals, even long after Napoleon's death, will remain. Napoleon will influence the country enough that it will infect it with new liberal ideas and change the 19th century forever.

The absolutist monarchy stood against everything Napoleon defendedm because if those things were abolished, they would go to shit.

So when the french are kicked out, the english stay. General Beresford basically becomes a de facto king in the king's absence, because John VI turns out enjoyed the brazilian weather a lot more.

Now excuse me cause this is the part I'm not too familiar with. I was actually looking at a series of books by Laurentino Gomes on the topic. he's a brazilian historian who wrote about the portuguese court in brazil and slavery, so here's a tip for those like me who want to know where to start. What I'm not very familiar with is the court in brazil.

Basically, at a certain point, the king is forced to come back and get rid of General Beresford. The anti-british sentiment in the country that prevailed through the 19th century starts here, with Beresford benefitting a lot of his countrymen and repressing anyone who stands against him. THe book Felizmente Há Luar, which we had to study in school and is about the failed revolt by Gomes Freire, is about this exact fact.

There's a character here I haven't mentioned. Carlota Joaquina, wife of John VI, and arguably the vilest woman to have ever lived in this country. By "vile" I mean, spotting a hot guy on the way, finding out who he is, and having his wife killed so she can fuck him. It's downright insane. And Carlota Joaquina was the great manipulator behind her son, Miguel I.

WHile the royal family comes back to portugal, Pedro IV stays in Brazil. What led to the Ipirange scream is another thing I'm not familiar wiht but the presence of the royal family in Brazil reinforced the wish for independence. Maybe a brazillian follower can chime in and explain this a lot better (I'd actually REALLY appreciate that!!)

Pedro IV ends up declaring Brazil an Empire, this becoming Pedro I. I think it's shortly after that John VI, the man who hid chicken legs in his coat pockets out of fear of being poisoned, died by poison. Thus, his son Miguel gets to the throne

Now Liberal sentiment since Napoleon had grown considerably, and by now, Miguel is not happy, so he conducts a "purge". He leads a very repressive regime against Liberals, which lead them to contact Pedro in Brazil and ask him to come here and get rid of his brother.

I seriously don't know what leads to Pedro stepping down and his daughter Maria ascending to the throne (again, if another brazilian wants to either fact check me or teach me, I'm more than happy to hear), but Pedro comes to Portugal precisely to fight a war against his brother.

And that's the civil war.

Listen, in the middle of all of this, the root cause of the fight, is the Constitutional Charter. The Constitutional Charter had been approved in 1821, but barely upheld. I believe Miguel's mistake was to refuse the Constitutional Charter, as it was against absolutist ideals. Think of the constitutional charter as something like the 19th century Magna Carta, what limited a king's ability to jsut rule over everything and delegate the government to a parliament.

Another point of contention was the church. By now, the Inquistion is finally abolished (1820) but the church still holds IMMENSE power over the country. Liberals want something VERY CLOSE to a secular state. They want the people to have access to education outside of the church, and they want the extinction of monastic orders (which they will achieve in 1834). The absolutists can only exist with the church and its power, so Miguel is naturally against this.

Pedro IV ends up winning the war, and his brother is sentenced to exile and signs a contract stating his side of the family can never, ever take the throne. Fun fact: the "Duque of Braganza", the only remnant of the royal family we have today and who is at the head of the monarchist party, actually descends from Miguel. So you want to have an argument against him, just say "maybe your ancestor shouldn't have lost the war".

I don't know much about the liberal wars, but I know that, like the war againsat napoleon, it involved a lot of guerrilla. A notorious moment was the siege of Porto, in which Porto held strong agaisnt the absolutists (so, Miguel) so spectacularly (they even bombed Clérigos), Pedro IV left it in his will that his body should be buried in Brazil but his heart belonged to Porto. His heart is still there lmao

Again, if any brazilian reading this wants to add whatever, I'm more than happy to hear cause this is an episode of both our histories I am lacking in a lot

[oftw0tongues]

rapid fire run-down of kingdom / house lore !

so  basically  a  long  ass  time  ago,  there  was  oriel  (an  established  kingdom)  to  the  north,  and  then  a  province  with  some  ungoverned  elven  settlements.  sick  sick  sick  tight  tight  tight.  each  of  these  settlements  brought  something  dope  as  hell  to  the  table,  good  job  everybody,  and  the  five  families  which  kinda  governed  /  watched  over  their  respective  settlement  were  like,  damn  ok  we  should  like  come  together  and  make  larger  decisions  to  benefit  the  people  living  here.  however  one  family  fucking  ruined  it  because  we  always  gotta  have  one  greedy  summabitch  in  the  mix  that  just  can’t  let  bygones  be  bygones  which  is  the  meliamne  family  who  decides  to  be  like:  actually�� we  have  prophets  in  our  family  so  we’re  gonna  be  the  top  dog,  the  rest  of  you  can  get  fucked.  naturally  a  little  tussle  breaks  out  and  after  a  few  months  of  fucking  each  others  shit  up,  they  sit  down  at  a  table  and  are  like,  ok  this  isn’t  working.  so!  they  basically  decide  that  sure,  the  meliamne  family  can  sit  as  the  monarchy  but  they  cannot  just  put  their  whole  hands  in  the  pot  without  checks.  everyone  agrees  and  the  remaining  four  families  take  over  some  specific  supporting  roles  which  in  turn  demands  the  sitting  monarch  consult  these  advisory  families  before  making  decisions  involving  war  /  trade  /  etc. 

fast  forward  through  what’s  considered  the  age  of  peace  to  the  age  of  dragons,  which  as  one  can  guess  yeah,  fuckin  dragons  dog.  oriel  sends  word  from  the  north  like,  hey  we  got  a  big  ass  fire  breathing  problem  up  here  ya  wanna  like  help  a  homie  out.  the  naïlo  family  gets  the  other  family’s  on  board  and  cahir’s  great  xa  lot  grandfather  takes  his  sons  and  some  militant  forces  and  heads  on  up  there.  dragons  are  in  fact  a  wild  entity  to  fight  but  eventually  they  ground  a  couple  and  the  rest  fuck  off  to  the  south  west  to  a  place  called  the  valley  of  dragons  (very  creative  shut  up)  .  bad  news  is  like,  hella  dudes  die  because  they’re  LITERALLY  DRAGONS  but  the  naïlo  son’s  survive  and  honestly  nothing  gets  you  street  cred  like  killing  a  dragon  in  a  fantasy  novel.  so  the  age  of  dragons  passes  because  the  dragons  obviously  go  away  and  that’s  pretty  cash  money  and  for  the  most  part  it’s  just  a  long  ass  time  or  monitoring  the  valley  of  the  dragons  bc  they  don’t  want  them  to  like  go  extinct  that  would  absolutely  piss  off  the  gods.  aod  turns  into  what’s  considered  the  age  of  plagues  which  is  not  a  good  time  for  anyone  involved  for  obvious  reasons.  they’re  like  popping  up  every  few  years  to  fuck  everyone’s  shit  up  and  like,  as  one  can  imagine  people  are  getting  a  little  wild  and  crazy  and  desperate.  it  begins  to  put  a  heavy  fracture  on  the  existing  good  sportsmanship  between  the  families  and  while  the  monarchy  starts  doing  out  of  pocket  shit  without  consulting  the  other  families,  the  other  families  are  like:  damn  dude  it  might  be  time  to  throw  this  fucker  into  the  sea. 

so  then  we  hit  the  age  of  dust  which  is  like,  absolute  mad  lad  times.  you’ve  got  war,  you’ve  got  famine,  you’ve  got  two  families  fighting  the  other  two  families  because  yall  just  can’t  seize  fucking  power  and  go  straight  up  crazy.  this  shit  goes  on  for  a  hot  minute,  and  oriel  is  just  sitting  up  to  the  north  like:  bruh  wtf  is  this.  the  naïlo  family  hits  them  with  that,  “hey  so  we  helped  you  fight  dragons  if  you  remember  so  like…”  and  then  oriel  is  like,  damn  tru.  they  send  forces  down  to  aid  in  the  upsurping  because  all  this  war  is  fucking  up  their  rhythm  as  a  friendly  kingdom  who  relies  on  the  ports  off  the  coast.  the  last  straw  is  when  the  monarch  basically  face  fucks  one  of  the  family  houses  into  literally  nothingness,  and  cahir’s  great  grandfather  is  like,  not  today  bud.  the  king  isn’t  just  upsurped,  he’s  straight  up  killed  on  a  whole  public  execution  thing  by  the  naïlo  family  who  essentially  isn’t  like,  elected  into  power  but  people  are  basically  like:  yall  went  crazy  want  a  crown. 

now  we  hit  the  age  of  warfare.  meath  is  doing  good,  cahir’s  dad  takes  over  for  his  father,  and  these  folks  have  realized  they  can  export  war  and  military  prowess  like  a  literal  tangible  good.  their  boarders  have  expanded,  their  alliances  are  solid,  and  serving  king  gets  wrapped  up  in  this  idea  that  this  sitting  family  is  favored  by  pantheon  because  they  can  do  some  absolutely  batshit  stuff.  later,  this  is  kinda  like…  underlined  by  cahir  who  fuckin  dies  per  prophecy  but  then  comes  back  which  isn’t  unheard  of  but  it  goes  crazy  bc  that’s  like  proof  that  he’s  gods  favorite  for  a  lot  of  people.  

[streamdotpng]

So, Does anyone know of the anime Beelzebub? If not, let me set the scene

Yes, this is wenclair, just with a child that's lowkey an evil bastard that enjoys violence

Anyways..

First off, demons would exist

Demons are attracted to power as a measuring contest for their strength

One demon royalty has son, he is a shitty father. Demon royalty sends off child to overworld to have a person nurture son to bring the end of the world and rebel against the demon kind Gomez

Enid finds the carrier, accidentally makes a packbond with child. By packbond, I mean the baby got attached and Enid is fucking confused

Now here's the tricky part

In the anime, demon royalty had a maid go accompany Mc in taking care of the baby. Obviously the maid is a demon and she lowkey became the love interest

I'm just wondering if I should make wendesdya that caregiver

Except, I'm thinking that the demon royalty was trying to ursurp the current monarchy which is the Addams family.

Demon gets executed for not straight up rebelling but sending their spawn to do so.

Wednesday tracks down the baby and meets Enid, who's gets a Lil power up from bonding with said demon baby that was prophesised to bring the world end

Enid, who's usually lawfully good rn goes "HELLO?? THIS IS A BABY?? WHY ARE U TRYING TO KILL IT????"

Wednesday, brandishing her sabre: dudes supposedly the antichrist and even if he wasn't, he has to pay for his father's sins

Enid, panicking bc baby murder is not what she expected when helping a baby out: WELL, I'M HIS FATHER NOW SO LIKE- I'M PRETTY SINLESS??

Wednesday, who knows jackshit abt enid: fair, but who says that's going to stop me?

Enid, who knows that demons make deals: OK but what if we make a bet???

Wednesday, a Lil interested: what do you have in mind?

Enid, very much willing to run: bet that I can get away from you for a minute and if I survive, you don't harm the baby

Wednesday: what do I get? I don't see much stopping me from stabbing you right now

Enid:.. An extra soul?

They duke it out, Enid comes semi unscathed with the help of the baby boost from the bond and dormant werewolf powers

Wednesday, semi impressed bc most Mortals tend to kneel over: OK, nice dodging but I only agreed to not harming the baby. Nothing abt you

Enid is absolutely pale asf and half way trying to get her heart from seizing: can we... Do it... Tomorrow?

Wednesday: k

Then she dissapeared without a word, leaving a dizzy Enid and a babbling baby behind.

The next day, after Enid stumbles back into her college dorm and sleeps, she wakes up to wednesday staring at her.

"hello, roommate," Wednesday says and Enid nearly dies bc she recognizes the voice but with how dark it was yesterday, she couldn't fully see the demon hunting her down.

to think her future killer is beautiful

Baby proceeds to zap tf out Enid in a tantrum and that's how wenclair went from killer to lovers with the added baby acquisition

[mollymagician]

Dreamling Week Day 7: AUs

…been battling with this for a month. Dreamling people, ilu, I haven’t wanted to write chapter-length fic in years, what have you done to my brain.

Wanted to have a whole first chapter to post but getting ready to travel for a week messed up my whole groove. Human AU. Dream is a reclusive street artist who can do things that are inexplicable. Hob is intrigued, and also glad it’s not pink penises this time. Matthew is Matthew, with thumbs.

Hob woke at too-fucking-early o’clock on a Wednesday morning to a text from Matthew. Several texts, in fact, though all but the first were just strings of exclamation points and emojis. Which wasn’t entirely unusual but he was entirely too tired to try and decipher it all.

Might want to come down and see this, boss, we got Dreamed!

“What the hell??” He scrubbed his hands over his face and rolled over, shoving the phone beneath the pillow. It wasn’t the best idea he’d ever had, considering it continued to buzz. Incessantly.

Hooooob

Hob, I know you’re awake

Get down here my good dude

Robert.

Im gonna throw rocks at your window again

HHOOOOOOOOOBB

Christ all right I’m coming

he texted back, eventually, toothbrush dangling out of his mouth. Five minutes, a pair of jeans and yesterdays jumper later he was clattering down the stairwell that led from his flat to the side lot of the pub that occupied the lower level of the building. He pushed open the exterior door and ran face-first into a small crowd.

“Matthew!!!” he called. “Matt, what is the— oh, hell.”

Matthew— good friend, pub manager, and reason why the ground under his window was littered with landscaping gravel— pushed his way past the gawkers and said, “Morning!”

Hob tilted his head, trying to make sense of what he was seeing with fifteen people plus Matthew sticking their phones in his line of sight to snap photos. “Yeah, good bloody morning. What exactly am I looking at?”

Graffiti was what they were all looking at, presumably, but the last time he’d had to scrub any off the side of the Inn, it was a neon pink penis and the words BITE ME MARGARET. This was altogether different. Over an area eight feet wide by nearly eight feet tall, each individual brick in the New Inn’s dignified old facade was…colored? It created a pixelated riot of hues, but Hob couldn’t see any particular rhyme or reason behind it.

Matthew elbowed him. “Cool, huh?”

“I…suppose?” Hob said. “I mean, usually when we get vandalized it’s just someone wanting to slag off the monarchy or something, I guess this is a nice change.”

Matthew snorted. He reached out and plopped a hand down unceremoniously on the top of Hobs head. He tugged him backwards a few feet, and then a bit to the right, waggled his head just so, and said, “There, look again.”

Hob blinked and did as he was told. “Oh.”

Sunflowers. An eight-foot-tall bunch of sunflowers splashed across the brickwork, now clear as day when before they’d been a choppy blur.

“Eh!? Eh!?? I know, right!”

Hob stepped past the thinning gaggle of onlookers and reached out to touch the wall at eye level, rendered a brilliant golden yellow by—whatever this was. It hadn’t been here the day before and he expected still-damp paint, but it was something soft and powdery that flaked off the brickwork and stained his fingers. “Is that…chalk?”

“Yeah, I forget how out of touch you are these days.” Matthew followed, snapping closeups from a few different angles as he went. “He always uses chalk. Or she. Maybe she. Not trying to be, you know, sexist. S’just they’ve got that whole Bansky thing going on right now so who the hell knows, really.”

Hob’s felt his eyebrows doing the complicated little dance they did anytime he was trying to follow along with one of Matthews tangents. “They who?” he finally managed.

Matthew pointed to the bottom corner of the mural, where, rendered in weirdly precise swirls of chalk, was the word DREAM.

[kirkenovak]

I’m here for all the betrayal headcanon but as far as my own expectations/headcanons go, I think Jaskier and Radovid will be separated by something far more nefarious than betrayal or family or magic or being forced to choose sides; I think their separation will come down to politics and societal expectations *shudders*

Ok so I never actually read the books.

Or played the games*.

But the internet was kind enough to spoil for me that Visimir dies and Radovid ascends to the throne.

Radovid comma Prince who spends all days drinking (allegedly) flirting with guys (canonically) and being King’s idiot, vapid younger brother can one hundred percent have a perfectly acceptable relationship with a wayward bard who may or may not be a viscount.

Radovid The King? Yeah. Nah. He will be excepted to get married to someone who can push out a heir, and his relationship will be fully political and arranged and not in a sexy fanfic way. I can even see the push to betroth him to Ciri and wouldn’t that be a wonderfully fucked up.

Now, HAVING SAID THAT, Redania is clearly based on fake medival Poland and heirs were never be all end all for us. We had a woman inheriting the throne and being crowned king (ask you local Pole about queen Jadwiga). We had country being split into pieces to avoid succession wars. And of course we had elective monarchy (yea that thing from the end of GoT that people made fun of is how Poland would get its monarchs for hundreds of years).

Radovid could totally announce he’s not getting any wives thank you very much and marry a dude (coughsJaskiercoughs) since clearly gay marriages are a thing that exists in N!Witcher!verse and just choose his successor. But to do that he’d have to hold actual power which I don’t think Djiekstra will allow. Radovid will be his puppet and for his own good and the good of the county he will be forced to play along and dance.

Jaskier may be no more than A Thing On The Side which in any other circumstance he’d accept… except here. Because he actually loves Radovid and that would break him.

(Obv they are getting a happy ending after the war hahahah I’m talking about the end of s3 and s4 ofc ofc. Yea my boys are getting their happy ending thank you very much for asking)

*my friend worked for cdproject while they were developing the very first Witcher game and let me play it on his home computer, before it was even in beta

[hizznbyte]

hey! just so u know, i (and i'm sure many others) would love to hear about that AU ! but it's alr if u don't wanna share it yet, do what makes u comfortable 👍

Oughh.. ohhh boy. Okay I should probably finally get to answering this ask gahhhh!.!..

Hi you!!! I’m assuming this is about my TWA AU post thing I made and deleted a little bit ago, in which I’d be happy to talk about it! I’m totally fine with sharing that shtuffs if you wanna hear about it, the only reason I’ve been hesitant to do so and putting it off is because my English is super sucky and I can’t articulate or explain my thinking properly so it can get super confusing, especially when we get to the more complicated lore. Plus, I don’t wanna make this post as long as the other one [that was pain in my ass to type and post 😭🙏] but.. I suppose I can take a swing at it! Please do bear with me haha.

So I’m not into TWA as I was before [I do sometimes rewatch videos out of boredom or for writing purposes] but I used to be super hyperfixated on it.. uh??? More than a year ago according to my discord. And I came up with this dumb unnamed AU which I fleshed out but never elaborated on. It’s got some complicated lore which I’ll try to explain to the best of my ability. Also like don’t jump me when I say I forgot most, if not everything from the original TWAEU lore so whatever I’m making up my own story now.

In the story, JP [Ego] finishes writing a chapter of his super awesome amazing BEST STORY EVER! and he’s so proud of himself that he goes to take a well deserved nights rest. And then he gets fucking isekai’d. Of course, it’s the most cliche, generic isekai plot ever, so JP just thinks he’s dreaming. He’s the all-mighty powerful chosen one. He’s self aware and got all the plot armor in the world. He’s got himself a useless familiar who dumps the plot at him. It’s your standard isekai story, save for the harem collecting because JP couldn’t pull to save his life. Anyways, he’s transported to this kingdom or whatever, because there’s always a monarchy in good fantasy right? And for whatever reason, the Knights of Artistic Integrity are the only authority figures despite sucking at their job. LOL.

Anywhos! JP’s goal is to “defeat the evil in the kingdom and restore it to peace so he can return to reality yeah!!” [the evil in question being his inners]. But JP doesn’t really take his quest seriously because why would he. It’s a dumbass dream he thinks until he almost dies and realizes “Wow! This dream sure is wack! It’s almost like this… isn’t a dream. Also what happened to my plot armor?” Or whatever white people say. In any case, he’s saved by the one and only Sir Knight Commander Mcstabbypants! [my beloved]. KC realizes that JP just might be the chosen one the prophecy called for ! So they take him back to Sir Adblock who devises a deal. JP and the knights will work together, he gets rid of the evil and restores peace to the kingdom and they help him return to reality. It’s a fair enough deal so JP agrees.

Things happen but JP and KC need to find Inner Critic. So they track down, arrest, and interrogate the Ancient Conspiracy Guy who claims to know where IC is. He’s a dirty liar and just wants to get out but he does know where to find the Cthulhu Cult Leader who’d probably know where IC is. They could also be a useful asset in defeating evil if they figured out how to get the Cthulhu Cult Leader on their side. This is also a shameless lie btw, but JP and KC don’t think much of it and without many leads they drag Ancient Conspiracy Guy around trying to find em. In reality Conspiracy Guy kinda just wants to get Cthulhu Cultist dude arrested because he’s petty as fuck. Don’t question it.

I’m gonna go ahead and skip that whole saga thing, but JP and co. find Inner Critic. And the guy is all “I’ve heard many things about you J.P. BEAUBIEN. It’s about time you owned up and repaid for the damages you caused.” or.. something like that, and JP goes “I have not a clue what you’re talking about because I just got here, but I’m gonna assume that’s a good thing!”

Anyways they kill Inner Critic. RIP. Everyone celebrates! They got rid of the evil! That is until JP’s familiar FINALLY shows up and goes “Wait, no, you weren’t supposed to kill him. You were just supposed to cleanse him [whatever that means]” which would’ve been nice to know before they killed the guy!! But no they need him alive. Man I sure wish there was a way to bring the dead back to life-

Hey so did I talk about Inner Greed’s giant 3D printer? But before when can address that ginormous elephant in the room, we have to get into the nitty gritty for uh context. This is where the lore kind of gets confusing but stay with me here! [Oh Solid Space… how I’ve longed to finally talk about you...]

So what exactly is Solid Space? In the AU lore, Solid Space is a theoretical concept proposed by this guy named Inner Ambition, that aimed to explain an oddly specific conundrum. If you watched a Terrible Writing Advice video before you’d know that all the art and characters are built up of shapes. Disconnected shapes that is [and yes, I am very aware this is a stylistic thing that makes the graphics simpler but in this AU it’s pretty important]. This design choice still exists in my AU, where all the characters don’t have those parts connecting their limbs so they just appear to be floating but it’s more exaggerated. Namely, their bodies lack a neck and joints in the shoulders, elbows, wrists, hips, knees, and ankles. What remains is an empty space filled up by air. This led to people wondering, how are we [the people in the AU] still able to function normally without these necessary parts? I mean, they can still eat, drink, breathe, and talk without a neck? Their limbs stay in place and can’t really be pushed or pulled around without feeling pain. So how do you explain this? Inner Ambition aimed to figure that out, conducting various experiments, and learned the following:

The empty space between limbs behaved in such a way that IA dubbed it the “Limb Space Paradox”. Essentially, if you try to touch the limb space with a part of your body [say, sticking your finger in the space where your neck should be] it would go through as if there were nothing there. Like there was just air between them. You could cut through that space and not feel a thing. HOWEVER! Any other object, substance, or element that made contact with that space would react as if there were a solid object in between them. If you tried to stick a pencil in between the space where your shoulder would be, it would stop and hit a solid wall. It would NOT pass through. If you poured water down your arm, it would flow downwards the sides of your arm instead of through the empty space. Air would also hit the surface instead of going through the other side.

The fact that these characters can bleed, breathe, feel and be hurt imply the existence of skin, organs, muscles, nerves and veins, bones, and the like within these spaces, yet it cannot be seen or altered. This, ladies and gentlemen, is what Inner Ambition calls “Solid Space”. Solid Space is a confusing idea, implying that parts of their body exist in some form, in a plane beyond their own. Something they cannot properly comprehend. Because of this, Solid Space cannot be artificially recreated [keep that in mind].

Now, why exactly this is and what evolutionary advantage this feature has is unclear, because IA died right before he could figure out the answer.

And it may or may not be JP’s fault.

Uh anyways back to Inner Greed’s printer? Oh yeah! So Greed has the ginormous machine that resembles a kind of 3D Printer. And essentially, he can produce literally anything [and I mean ANYTHING] in large quantities as long as he has the filament. The filament in question is artificially crafted and owned by Greed and Greed only. The cost to create something using Greed’s printer is insanely high, so usually only the rich and elite can afford to even come close to the thing [obviously, this IS Greed we are talking about!] Usually, companies will collaborate with Greed to pump out products in mass amounts where they then sell it off to the public for a lower, yet still expensive price. People mainly prefer to buy products from these companies because of a little bit of Greed propaganda. He assures everyone his printed products are higher quality, better for the environment and health [when that’s entirely false], and the price is totally worth it! Even though you’d have to sell your newborn to even afford housing and shi. Nowadays, a majority of big companies get their stuff from Greed. Awesome. I love capitalism. Also Inner Greed is essentially controls the government and military and.. well pretty much everything which is why the Knights need him GONE. [Random fact? The Chainsaw General Guy -What’s his face- is Greed’s right hand man here, even though he hates working for Greed and just needs to pay off a debt. I dunno]

But like I said, Greed’s machine can print anything and everything. That includes printing people, cloning the powerful, nd’ reviving the dead. Hell yeah! 3D printing necromancy babeyy!!

The only issue with this system is the fact that it’s virtually impossible to do any of this as a layperson. The process is not only INCREDIBLY difficult [you yourself need to provide the resources/materials for filament] and time consuming, it’s extortionate!! Obviously it’s gonna be expensive, this is Greed after all, but even the most wealthy elites [aside from Greed’s inner circle] are hesitant to pay the price and only really do it when they get extremely desperate. Just imagine your average millionaire’s yearly income I guess. Anywho, if you were somehow able to afford and pay for this service, the steps required are just as troublesome. First, you’d need the body of the subject you’d want to print, and it needs to be preserved perfectly. That is to say, if the body of a dead person sustained any injury [internal or external] they’d need to be fixed before bringing them to Greed or he’ll just print them out as is, and there’s no going back or fixing it afterwards. And trust me, the medical bills are just as bad. So if you broke your leg before you die you gotta get that thing back in place or else you’ll just come back with a permanent broken leg. This also just makes it hard for those whose bodies are missing to be revived, those like Inner Ambition- I’m getting ahead of myself. Anyways, after receiving and scanning the body, you’d need to provide Greed with a large enough sample of preserved DNA and tissue to be mixed in with his artificial filament. Oh, remember when I explained Solid Space and said it can’t be artificially recreated? Yeah, well Greed will just replace that space with a clear, resin like substance that mimics the appearance of solid space but really acts more like a glass tube where you can see your insides through. Extremely fragile and painful to live with. And after all that you’d the wait a month, give or take? Depends on how nice Greed was feeling that moment.

All that time and effort… and only to have the husk [body] of the person you’re printing. You’d need to go to Greed AGAIN and have him reprogram a conscience and memories back into the husk to fully complete the process. So yeah. Capitalism win. The only exception to this would be Greed’s inner circle of people which he has their bodies already archived for quick and easy printing. The inner circle in question being made up of mostly rich political figures who JP is also tasked with getting rid of.

Not too sure if any of this makes sense or is that relevant to the story that I had to flesh it out like that. I stopped working on the AU immediately after my hyperfixation died off.

But basically JP doesn’t wanna have to go through that process because that’s annoying as hell, plus Greed also seems to hate him and the Inner Critic so he wouldn’t dare revive that guy. Makes JP’s mission a lot more complicated. But I guess that’s his fault-

So now JP’s real goal has become more of a “figure out what you did to turn the world to ruin and repay for the damages and crimes while also restoring order to the kingdom” or something like that. Because JP isn’t really the hero the story initially sets him out to be. All this while trying to return back to reality… yeah this is gonna be a long mission. Existential crises, battles n betrayals, Y’know the like.

And that’s… as much as I wrote before effectively forgetting about it and never continuing the story from there. And man in retrospect this is an absolutely insane AU that I could probably rewrite and improve but hey, this dumbass post is long enough as is. So many tangents and ramblings…sorry I don’t know how to conclude this chaotic mess of a post. I am exhausted. I’m glad I finally finished writing this so I can post it and stop thinking about it LOL 😭🙏 If anyone cares, I don’t have any official designs for this AU so feel free to come up with your own interpretations.

Anywhos, thank you for the ask and I hope this wasn’t too awful of a read [that is, if anyone actually read all of this. Sorry XD] Much love to you all.

[vacantgodling]

Oh no, sorry about the last ask **sent it and immediately saw the post that Alizath is a place** ^^' But please still provide The Information

LMAOOOO NAUR that’s my bad. like i said i talked about this wip like once and never mentioned it again pfffff

but basically the information:

who is alizath

this fucky landmass up north. the smidge of yellow at the bottom is galeré, the country paramour’s mess takes place in cuz SURPRISE… these share a universe pff

what is alizath?

a hot mess basically. the government is run by “courts” or factions (perhaps cults… at least one of them kinda is) and there’s a central parliament that’s supposed to be the voice of the common people. like. it barely is but we move.

anyway tho there’s the iron spring, the titanium summer, the brass autumn, and the steel winter.

we mainly focus on the brass autumn bc the “dad” of our mc kirsi, used to be the ruler of the brass autumn but then he was framed for killing a guy and was exiled.

the story? well basically kirsi is supposed to bring favor back to her family by attending socialite events so that her father can be allowed back into alizath. also so that they can stop being horribly poor (they aren’t terribly bad off cuz they’re getting help but it’s complicated).

the real plot however is found as kirsi starts getting close to people and it becomes very apparent that the iron spring wants to become a sole monarchy. power struggles, romance, death, chaos, war, and more ensue!

but some basic important to know characters:

kirsi: she’s the mc. she’s also adopted (does not know this), part of a prophecy (definitely doesn’t know this), and isn’t fully human (kirsi knows jack shit about anything basically)

jeanna sunniva: she’s kirsi’s aunt who helped raise her for the purposes her brother has. she is strict but very protective over kirsi and her life has been Rough

juven: current leader of the brass autumn in his father’s stead. he’s also one of kirsi’s love interests (end game ot3 situation). he’s too young to be shackled with this shit but yknow. he’s here now. also he wants to keep alizath out of the hands of the spring and would rather it turn more into a republic or smthn.

amarette: juven’s best friend and from the titanium summer. his mama hates him teehee. he, juven and kirsi are end game ot3. he just wants to be able to live his life how he wants.

greye: eldest daughter of the iron spring who hates her father and is uh…. plotting lmao.🧍‍♂️

lord flykrost: the leader of the steel winter and tbh the only one with a head on his fucking shoulders. he values his family more than anything and is ready to turn the steel winter into its own nation at the drop of a hat to protect his family and the citizens who live in his region. very chill dude but he used to be the head of the general alizathan army so idk don’t fuck with him

lady love: lord flykrost’s wife and she’s scarier than him. she did settle down and loves those loyal to her fiercely. she and jeanna used to be good friends but why hmmm 🤔

and a bunch of other characters but yahhhhhhh

how did you get inspiration?

dude i used to love the app game helix waltz (it’s no longer a thing rip) and i wanted to make a story where i could romance my favorite character juven (i didn’t change juven’s first name but a lot about him otherwise has changed lol) sooooo this story got born out of that.

so yah i hope that’s a good overview pff