#dose this make sense? dose it not? idk i dont care

[idkimjustexistingsblog]

I love music. And people working together to create something beautiful. I I take a music class and I absolutely love how we are together and hold each other up. It dosnent matter if you have shit going on with someone when somthing happens and we are in class, we show up for eachother. Especially in marching band.

[galacticghoste]

OK im a speak my thoughts on the movie, I'm a try to cover everything i remember

Obviously don't take what I say too seriously it's just my opinion

Spoilers obviously

OK LET ME JUST SAY

I LOVVVVVVEEEEEEDDDD THE MOVIE IT WAS FREAKING AWESOME ME AND MY FRIEND KEPT FAN GIRLING AT RANDOM SCENES AND REFERENCES

Which btw LOVE ALL THE REFERENCES I know i probably missed a bunch but a fun one someone pointed out to me was when sonic say a back to the future quote I didn't even notice 😅

Also Knuckles being afraid of ghost makes sense i keep forgetting i played Adv2 and friend reminded me that oh yeah he dose fear ghost even Casper

"There are no friendly ghost" 🤣

Anyways now MARIA GHAAAAAAAA I LOVED HER SHE SO SWEET AND CUTE AND IT IS NICE TO SEE HER JUST BE A NORMAL KID WHO JUST HAPPEND TO LIVE WITH HER GRANDFATHER and also the fact she roller skates, plays music and dose arts which IM SO GLAD ABOUT HEHEH and was just being a kid was just so sweet

The way she finds a way to get shadow out of the lab and it's by using a teddy bear my HEART and maria being reckless and a bit of trouble maker is SO HER

And and she used shadow as a way to get around faster hit me at my childhood I was shadow as a kid my lil cuz would tie a rope to my bike and I would just bike around as they did nothing. 🤣

BUT LOOK

Idk i feel like the movie needed more time to get more things fleshed out it dosent fully feel like they got everything there

Seeing the film now i understand why Amy or anyone else couldn't be in it their just wasn't enough time

though I already knew this i just felt like complaining about it bc I was grieving the fact they took Amy's scene but since in the movie shadow doesnt lose his memories so Amy wouldn't be able to do much and helping him remember if their nothing to remember it wouldn't be impactful, i do hope they interactat some point they are a cute duo

I think more time was needed too because of Director rockwell, you saw the way she started taking charge and looking like she was gonna take over Commander Walter's place and be new leader it felt like there was gonna be more with her like a betrayal and turn over power to her making herself the leader and those could explain why commander Walter just give the key to sonic bc idk why trust him so easly WITH THE KEY TO DESTROYING THE FUCKING PLANET???

Also the fact the Donut Lord was able to just easly fool her didn't feel satisfying she gave up way to fast for someone who looked like her roles were gonna lead to something even if it was just plane hate for sonic and his friends.

Also I can see why shadow may not like tails Bro literally almost drowned him and stone and interrupted his Novela and didnt even let him eat his "Revenge Guacamole"

(The fact shadow named it that was so CUTE bc ahhh sweet boy my heart!)

Also i do like how shadow remained loyal to Gerald throughout the whole thing really shows how much he cares about the family he as left and how he was fine with dieing if it ment avenging Maria

But I find it interesting that he questions his action a bit late like dude you just now thought about that? I think it would have been better if he questions his action from the beginning but kept using the excuse that this is what Maria wanted or something like that it would given maybe a bit more build up to what Gerald says to him to make him stop questions it

Obviously their no way Maria wanted to destroy the earth even Gerald knew that yet never says it out loud just says "remember what they took from us" and that was enough for shadow to stop thinking about it

Also THE FUCKING FACT SHADOW JUST BEEN LIVING THE SAME NIGHTMARE FOR 50 YEARS HURTS ME POOR GUY

And the fact he says that the sadness was kinda what he got use to and ever knew

(I kin i just dont have nightmares my brain just like to remind me of stuff)

Also did the government just keep him alive bc he was some alien from another planet?

Also he didn't seem to be too young when. He arrived to earth so dose he have amnesia from wherever he was from what was his childhood before maria did he even have one? U would think they would have diesected him and study him while be was put to sleep/frozen for so long

He's been reliving the same events for so long but one day it was enough to wake him up thx to Gerald

Also DOES GEROLD GO TO Comicons?!?! bc ahhh he was saveing that giant arm for it XD

Also speaking on Maria again I'm a bit disappointed by the fact they decide to not cover the fact that Maria was sick or that shadow was supposed to be a cure for her as well as a weapon

I need more scene of the both of them and their lives back in the research facility

I don't think the cover much on him even being the ultimate life form at all or the other experiment or the FACT THEY ARE NOT IN SPACE

I FUCKING KNEW IT I FUCKING KNEW THEY WEREN'T IN SPACE THE SCENES WE GOT WERE ENOUGH PROOF TO SHOW IT HEHHEEHEHEHEH

Its a bit disappointing It doesnt feel as impactful when shadow dose get to step outside for the first time

ALSO I ALREADY WISH WE GOT THE SCENE OF MARIA SAYING SAYONARA AND SHADOW BEING DEPRESSED IN THE TUBE AS HE LANDS TO EARTH

The closest thing to it was when he was captured and tased to enter the tube again and the look of betrayal and sadness and later anger in his face AHHH

His back story in this one is giving Venom vibes with the space rock and him being inside it like its a fucking egg, HE IS LITERALLY JUST AN ALIEN he's NOT SOME SCIENCE EXPERIMENT LIKE WHAT?!?!

Where was he from is he still from the same planet as sonic?

I AM curious on what this will lead to and if we learn more I HOPE WE DO bc that movie did NOT COVER ENOUGH ON THAT SHIT

ALSO THE FACT SHADOW REACTS THE WAY HE DOES WHEN HE SEES SONIC SPECIFICALLY MAKES TOTAL SENSE

HE has never seen another hedgehog

HECK IM WILLING TO BET HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW HE WAS POSSIBLY ONE UNTILL THEN

HE literally would ask Maria if she's scared of him bc he knows everyone else is afraid of him and was worried Maria may be afraid too AHH POOR BABY (no more monster movies for him)

But yeah a bit disappointed I KNOW THEY AINT GONNA DO EVERYTHING THE SAME IM NOT THAT STUPID BUT IDK I JUST FEEL like they only cut that shit out bc they didn't have time which if that's the case it might as well been a two parter film it would give more time to flesh out the characters and give more impact to emotional scenes

(Who knows if they make TV show it would help cover some backstory on him)

Bc that scene with the commander didn't hit i didn't feel too much sympathy and I know i should but the scene wasn't giveing it for me

NOW A SCENE THAT WAS IMPACTFUL

Was when Gerald said to Egg man "your no Maria" I FELT SO BAD FOR EGG MAN

UGH MY POOR DUDE

No but Literally he was in a orphanage his whole life and he ever bothered to get him

Im guessing egg man was born while Gerald may have been in jail or he just didn't care enough.

He either never knew about him or didn't care bc i know he was in jail but egg man is probably a similar age Maria was back then so him never bothering to get him just means he only cared for Maria and kinda shadow he did say KIDS and instead of Just referring to Maria so I think he still got crazy at some point while in jail.

But I wonder why they Commander lied

Yes their was an accident that could have been avoided but it wasn't because of shadow it was bc some dumb ass who decided to shot at some kids and an old man they missed but it cost Maria her life

also why the hell is shadow not reacting more strongly to Maria's death that was his fucking sister

I DONT THINK I SAW A SINGLE TEAR FROM HIM AND THAT DOESNT MAKE SENSE HE IS KNOWN TO CRY AT LEAST A BIT FOR LOSING MARIA BRO SHOULD HAVE BEEN SCREAMING IN PAIN BUT NOPE SILANCE AND ANGER UGHH WHY CANT CHARACTERS CRY ANYMORE not even the memory of it made him cry

Also HOW AND THE HELL IS IT that shadow was just being studied so lightly if he really is and full on Alien bro would have been diesected by now or at least have scars or memory's of it but nope nothing

(YES I KNOW ITS A FUCKING KIDS FILM IM JUST SAYING SHIT would make WAY MORE SENSE IF THEY AT LEAST MENTION IT if they didnt want to show it)

Also i was expecting him to be a bit more edgey i dont mind that he isn't but idk he just seemed depressed the enter movie poor guy needs therapy

I found if sweet that egg man got to expramce everything he missed out of In the film (probably what shadow wanted for him and maria)

Its interesting how shadow and Maria don't have to many lines together it feels like she only talked 1 or twice and that's it i wish their was MORE OF THEM

Also i found it interesting how shadow kept mentioning during their fight that sonic became just like him when it came to revenge and how he kept mentioning that sonic left to fight him against his friends wishes it feels like he saying he shouldn't have made the choice he did kinda like saying he would have done better if he was in his position or like he should be grateful (idk that's just my view on that scene i liked it)

Also the way sonic tells shadow that the pain doesn't go away but he can change the way he views that pain and how he can remember that the love he had for her will always stay

Its sweet but didn't feel that impactful as I thought it would be the word were but idk i think they should have lingered a bit more on the scene or something it feels a bit fast paste at time.

ALSO HAS ANYONE SEEN SHADOWS EYES ARE PINK WHEN HE GOES SUPER?!?!?!?! YESSSSSSSSZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAHHHHHH

Also LOVE HOW SHADOW AND SONIC BATTLE TOGETHER IN THE END THEY WERE AWESOME

But then in the final part when trying to stop the laser from killing the earth later separate them with sonic kinda takeing the place of shadow falling scene and shadow just goes poof for a bit

bro literally just cares to get a task done and not save anyone he doesnt save stone when their place was flooded and now sonic

Also glad eggman still kinda pissed on the moon

BRO HAD ME WORRIED FOR A MOMENT THAT HE MAY BE DEAD BUT NOPE HE GOOD AHHHHHHHHHHHH AND THE WAY HIM AND EGG MAN DID SACRIFICE THEMSELVES TOO?!?! UGH THE BLISS SHADOW MUST HAVE FELT TO MAYBE REST IN PEACE AND EGG MAN REDMETION ARC WITH STONE WHILE IN AN ARK AHHHHHH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH HE CARES AHH

But I was SO SCARED THAT SHADOW REALLY DEAD IN THAT ONE my friend had to keep reassuring me that he's not dead they wouldn't let him die but i was like BUT THEY COULD?!?!

But nope they were right he alright 👍🏼

OK MY BIGGEST JOY WAS SEEING AMY

FUCKING YESSSSSSSSSSS I FUCKING HAD A FEELING IT WAS GONNA BE HER IT HAD TO BE IF THEY DECIDED TO CUT HER FROM THAT FUCKING FILM AND NOT JUST HER BUT METAL SONIC TOO??? BUT NOW WHO MADE METAL???

I have so many questions not enough answers anyways fuck you I think Amy is important and im so FUCKING GLAD SHE FINALLY SHOWS UP AHH GIRLY IS IMPORTANT and she gonna be a battle machine AHHH

Can't wait to see her reason from fighting all those robots who are METAL!!!

[foursaints]

need ur opinion on barty & pandora’s relationship bc i always saw them as really close but almost only behind closed doors or only with their friends?? barty has his whole shtick of being someone who “doesn’t care” and seems entirely indifferent to almost everyone (besides evan, reg, dorcas) and so when people see little ms sunshine pandora rosier walking next to him they’re always surprised?? well surely it must be because she’s evan’s twin right?? wrong!! barty always somehow gets roped into pandora’s mini quests!! he walks around the school with wet pants for the whole day because pandora insisted she needed help finding specific kinds of rocks in the lake that morning!! barty’s not a particularly sentimental guy, but you’re crazy if you think he ever threw out any of the random things pandora’s given him over the years… (truthfully he wanted to throw away the purple sparkly button she had found and given to him when they were 12, but he felt such an awful sense of guilt that he dug back through the trash, found it and has kept a shoebox underneath his bed of what she’s given him ever since.) i think pandora also never gave him the whole “if you hurt my brother i’ll kill you” talk because she just knew they were made for eachother in some weird way, but barty definitely gives anyone pandora’s dating that talk (maybe accompanied by a silent, but dead eyed regulus/evan/dorcas?) barty & pandora both fall asleep on the other one and she keeps his favorite snacks in her bag because he gets “hangry” she claims. he knows how she takes her tea and if he doesn’t have time in the morning there’s his favorite coffee ready to drink!! in a weird way i think barty almost values her everlasting kindness/naivety?something he feels he lost too young? almost mirror each other in the sense that they both value their individuality so deeply, but have also been isolated a lot throughout their lives and have had very few people to truly trust, yet turned out so so so differently? barty being more closed off, pandora being more open, etc. etc. they both share a protectiveness over all their friends, but their rage is entirely different, barty’s more loud and pandora’s more quiet. someone says something bad about pandora and barty’s beating them up, but if someone says something bad about barty pandora is absolutely dosing their morning juice with a potion that’ll make their skin turn purple for a month. idk!!! i feel like you could probably explain this better xx i have to thank you for the rosekiller, bcj, lily evans brainrot!!!

this is honestly such a perfect ask i dont want to tarnish it in any way... thank you for your words anon you're a preeminent understander and ill be thinking about them forever now

[moonshynecybin]

bc you asked for it: what happens in the same age au when they get to the premier class?

YESSSSS OKAY. so the thing is. in this scenario they are MUCHHH more codependent right out of the gate. truly like you are the only bitch i can relate to and understand and ALSO the only person i can use as a yardstick for how actually good at this sport i am. and my entire life is about discovering how good at this sport i am. like they both think they’re weird fucked up soulmates created in a lab to complement and destroy each other. and they’ve held the other’s hair back after they puked when they were teenagers AND they’ve been inside each other. WEIRD shit sublimating into their egos and sense of selves.

which means ego really changes here! because if they went up against each other in their primes i’m not sure they would be as dominant as they were in real life… if vale didn’t win 9 titles without going to the gym that would change him as a person. and he’s reacting to MARC as his main rival here so he CANT win at those mind-game psychological warfare tactics he used as a little guy because marc is simply matching him in levels of crazy… idk it has interesting implications top to botttom for how these guys fundamentally view themselves and their lives!! i like to think about it!!!

but. basically. i think the main friction in their relationship, ESPECIALLY when they get to the premiere class, is the injury thing. even more so than normal. it’s not just i love you i’m scared that you aren’t taking care of yourself. it’s I DONT KNOW WHO I AM WITHOUT YOU please take care of yourself because i can’t race when i’m WORRIED about you (we see also how marc gets about alex) and racing is the MOST IMPORTANT THING!!! this goes both ways but vale is notably more anxious about it. like this scenario would add vale to the list of people who can make marc stop racing injured (and who are COMFORTABLE asking him to stop) BUT it also makes him a direct competitor to marc. and his oldest friend. and largest enemy. with no added hero worship BUT a big dose of first-love/situationship naïveté for them both. like knowing how they get on track together, how do they even begin to resolve thatttttt… contradictions on contradictions….. so marc doesn’t race injured as often, but maybe learns to protect himself independently even LESS (he doesn’t have to think about it, that’s what vale’s for !) and it reallyyyyy tears into their relationship because vale cannot be the entire scaffolding for marc’s ability to protect himself (he is also i think not protecting himself so well from injury. anything to beat marc, don’t know where or if sic fits here etc)

ANOTHER BIG TENSION. i also think that vale would NOT be one to want to settle down that young, whereas marc would wanna get soulbonded about it… so even while vale in this au has an easier time conceptualizing how important marc is to him, i think he imposes some distance in order to go out and like. process his parents divorcing/remarrying (SIDE NOTE 2: PIC OF MARC WITH BABY LUCA. THANK YOU.), sow his wild oats, hit up the club and be a little slutty etc (SIDE NOTE 3: UCCIO AND MARC BEEF WOULD GO FUCKING CRAZYYYY HERE) and marc is down to tag along for a lot of that stuff but at the same time. they’re teens/young men living in different countries so it’s not like they’ve ever talked about what they are or asked to be exclusive… and it’s not gonna feel great when vale disappears with a girl or marc has some fling with someone back home! and it’s not like they can come out so i actually think the on again off again vibes get TURBOCHARGED. the jealousy and angst is ratchet up to ten… maybe they don’t get sepang level divorced bc ego is different and they’ve known each other longer, but the little stuff digs more… they break up a lot they make up a lot…. they eventually get resolve it after marc’s arm injury i think… puts some stuff into perspective…

[gunpowder-tim]

so. podcast reccomendations

putting this under a read more it got l o n g

Ones i have listened to -

*Inkwyrm - COMPLETE, My ultimate fav podcast ever -id listen to the original first ep before the first ep redo cause i think it kinda makes more sense idk, Putting up with her boss is hard enough, but with the cutthroat fashion industry, and whatever is trying to kill everyone today, Mella and the gang have their hands full. One part sit-com, one part space opera.

*Kaleidotrope - COMPLETE, the cutest fucking shit ever filled with tropes and gayass idiots, The plot centers around Drew and Harrison, two reluctant college radio co-hosts-turned-accidental-advice-givers who find themselves in the middle of the campus’s oldest mystery: Do happy endings really happen at Sidlesmith? Can you really find your trope?

*Hell or High Rollers - 11 eps so far! dnd podcast but very rp based much less mechanic based /pos,  A table top role play podcast following the adventures of 4 Villains and their attempt to escape eternal damnation. theyre trying to escape hell and they have to get through all nine layers before they can!!

The Beacon - season 3 coming, After surviving a dangerous encounter with a monster, Bee discovers she has the magical ability to control fire. Confused and with no heroic aspirations, she reaches out online to try and find others with impossible powers like hers - but finding them is only half the battle. only listened to a few eps of this but its v enjoyable

Girl in Space - season 2 coming, Nothing fancy here -- just the simple audio diary of a girl in space. Also, there’s this weird and potentially ominous light in the distance that seems to be growing steadily closer. fun space stuff!

Violet Beach - COMPLETE, On New Year's Day, 2018, the lives of seven friends in the town of Violet Beach, Maryland, change forever. As weird sci-fi happenings become less "fi" and more reality every day, they begin keeping record of their experiences. These are those records. dont remember much abt the content (listened to it a long time ago lmao) but i remember enjoying it v much

Overkill - COMPLETE(?), After 19-year-old Aya Velasquez died mysteriously in Harding Park, no one seemed to care. At least not until a preteen medium accidentally summoned Aya herself to solve the mystery. With no memory of her death and no shortage of questions, Aya must make friends with her fellow ghosts and discover the truth behind the nation's most haunted park. v cool ghost shit but not horrory and also gay

Midnight Radio - COMPLETE, Drawing inspiration from 1950s radio serials and ghost stories, Midnight Radio follows two women finding love through an unlikely correspondence about community, leaving your small hometown, our relationship to the past, what it means to be haunted, and what we leave behind when we die. Remember: all ghost stories are love stories.

Death by Dying - season 2 in progress(?) The Obituary Writer of Crestfall, Idaho finds himself deeply in over his head as he investigates a series of strange and mysterious deaths… when he is supposed to simply be writing obituaries. Along the way he encounters murderous farmers, man-eating cats, haunted bicycles, and a healthy dose of ominous shadows. nightvale esque with a weird lil town, fun concept cool characters, the obituary writer is on the podcast tumblr like all the time and is v nice sauifgdsukf

36 Questions - COMPLETE, musical podcast! bit :/ cause its like got real celebs n shit in it but its good!!!!, In a last-ditch attempt to salvage their crumbling marriage, a couple uses the 36 questions—an experiment known for making strangers fall in love—to save their own relationship.

Directive - 2 seasons, when this came out the tumblr for the podcast messaged people to ask them to listen to it skjdfgdsk, listen to all of part 1 all at once, i didnt know there was a season two so idk abt that but this is sad so just bear that in mind , A Sci Fi series about a man stuck alone for 20 years, taking care of sleeping passengers on a ship to colonize a new planet.

*Love and Luck - hiatus since 2020 possibly finished, Love and Luck is a fictional radio play podcast, told via voicemails.  It’s a slice of life queer romance story with a touch of magic. very cute and nice and lighthearted

Dining in The Void - season 3 coming, When six alien celebrities are trapped onboard a space station, they will have to work together to survive--or die at the hands of an unknown monster. pretty sure i was/am mutuals (or sth) w someone who voice acts in this which i didnt know when i started listening, heavy themes i think kinda

Raising the Dead Again - indefinate hiatus, Raising the Dead Again is a triweekly podcast that follows a young, modern-day necromancer - a young man by the name of Quincy Bejanaro - before, during, and after making the biggest mistake of his life: resurrecting long-dead adventurers. really really loved this one sad theres only 9 eps :( and the story is unfinished

some of these do not have great input from me bc i listened to them years ago n my memory is garbage - starred ones are my favourites, pink is my opinion, italics are official descriptions

other ones i love but Do Not Reccomend are king falls am and eos 10 bc the creators r stupid ass losers and also the last season of eos 10 is so fucking stupid lmao

[heartfucksmouth]

being "highly sensitive" or whatever label you'd like to give it... it can be a double edged sword. I'm highly intuitive and alert to my surroundings, my brain is always turning things over and over, I recognize patterns and ripples and echoes and tiny shifts in energy.

it can feel so heavy living in a dysfunctional house, with parents that aren't even mine, trying to be a parent to my child, to myself, and teaching my partner to be his own parent too. and then having chronic pain on top of it, sensitizing me to everything even further.

it's the time of night where I just want to hold my child and soak up his innocence and feel the weight of him on my chest and hear him breathing and feel his tiny fingers softly close around mine. nights were hard and lonely when I was a kid. I'd sit on the stairs far past bedtime, listening to my parents fight viciously. Frozen in place. my mind telling me I had to listen to make sure I didn't need to protect my mother. how I'd do that, I didn't know. I didn't think that far. a hypervigilant 6 year old, vowing to be my moms personal savior.

now I try to make nights peaceful and full of cuddles. but hearing myles parents fighting brings ne right back to those moments. holding Ade brings me back to scooping up an autistic black boy while his dad and my brother beat the shit out of each other literally on the bed he was sitting on. Frozen and screaming. I think that moment changed me, healed a wound on my inner child self but also triggered me into oblivion.

now I feel so complex, both protective and scared - and angry - when I hear them. the parents that aren't mine (in-lawa), fighting about the same shitty stupid stuff.

I know I'm in the middle (muddle) of things changing for me.

sit in the cosmic soup... I'm just observing. trying to be patient. trying to let go. trying to see people for who they are and devising a plan of action accordingly.

I always go to end my posts with "I don't know" bc its usually very stream of consciousness lately. I don't have time during the day to think deeply about I things and I'm usually exhausted when I get on here. so , yeah, idk. idk if this makes sense to others, idk if I care that it does or not, idk what will happen tomorrow or even in the next 10 minutes.

I'm just trying to be present with the fact that this is my life. an age I never thought I'd reach, a purpose I never thought I'd have. a little life so soft and warm and curious and sensitive (ok zaiyah is all if those things too but-)... an imperfect situation but so perfectly satisfying when I shut it all out and focus on how much I've grown, myles has grown, how we're a mom and dad now.... and how we never want to be the mom and dad that are so wrapped up in ourselves they dont even know their tiny child is frozen in fear, listening to us scream at each other without ever hearing each other. how each day proves we can do this on our own. don't need their help that always comes with a heavy dose of toxicity. it makes us feel free. even if we're stuck here for now. trusting -believing in - ourselves and each other.

[lolothesilly]

man. ive been kind of down today & was starting to wonder if weaning off my antidepressant is having a negative effect (i'm doing it with my psych's supervision, dont worry!)

but then i cry for the first time in like. 2 years? and it wasnt even a Sad cry? it was about the thing i reblogged a lil bit ago about how humans have always loved and cared for each other?

and now im thinking. maybe this Isnt a bad sign? maybe i was just on such a high dose for so long that i got used to being kind of numb all the time, and now im having to like, re-adjust to having a full range of feeling ?

like. before today i think the last time i cried was when i was still with my last ex & that was. definitely a sad/upset/triggered cry. but this time, today, was just? idk? it wasnt Bad i wasnt Unhappy i was just overwhelmed with emotion i guess?

its been so long since i cried, it feels weird. like... i almost dont want to tell anyone irl bc on some level im afraid it means im backsliding. but i cant stop thinking about how it really genuinely Wasnt because i was sad or anything it was like? a hopeful cry i guess? ?

idk if this makes any sense lol. i see my psych wednesday and my therapist friday so i guess ill talk to them abt it.

though one other thing thats interesting now that i think about it... looking back, most of what ive felt for the past 3 years or so has been either mild happiness or intense anger? i cant remember feeling genuinely Sad in a long time.... and im not talking about like. hopeless empty depression sadness, either? bc i Still dont feel like that, even when i was feeling down this morning. i just mean... normal sadness ig?

i dunno.

[flaray25]

This may sound sad or insensitive but. In your au, did SpongeBob ever try to off himself?

TW for the thingy. If you feel sensitive and not wanting to read this stuff dont look. But if you do wanna read then read. (Idk if it made any sense i'm being random)

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Several times but Patrick tried his best to prevent him not to do it by doing all the hobbies that makes him feel happy.

Back in his highschool day with his only bff patrick getting through it was NOT an easy task to do it. He'd been bullied and abused the same time. Telling him to kill himself and mocking him so much.

Spongebob sometimes believe that theres nothing for him to do but follow what they tell him.

In the day of highschool graduation. Spongebob did attend with patrick but felt like- heavy knees... yknow? Like- brought down because from his thoughts "you will be humiliated" "you may have graduated but the actual you is just weak and a cry baby"

Patrick comforted his friend and pushed all those troubles out of Spongebob's thoughts and told him to never mind those.

(In my au Spongebob's natural hair color is black. He made it Blonde or Yellow in his start of college)

Spongebob after moving in and finally getting a job from the krusty krab he felt so free and happy. Squidward puts negative and harsh offending insults to him because on his perspective he thought that Spongebob grew up dumb, lucky, and never bothered, never bullied, showered with kind people.

Spongebob after a year he often gets customer complains about the krabby patty how he cooks it like this or that. Spongebob sometimes feels a bit lost and dozing off.

Whenever he goes out to his pineapple he chose the identity to be all happy and kind to people. He feels confused and questioning what his purpose of life is or

Why he even bothers to stay alive

He did attempted suicide five times by stabbing himself on the heart, falling off the roof from the toppest building in bikini bottom, getting shot on the head, getting run over by a boat mobile/bus, and over dosing himself with pills or drinking a bottle that is poisonous. It never worked. His injuries kept regenerating and healing. It really does seem like he'd been dying to try any other attempts.

He wanted to kill himself because he hated for how he was built this way. His biological parents never wanted him to be like that and wanted him succesful, choose his brain instead of heart, standing up, never cry, be strong. He was abused from them, Patrick sends a child abuse report to the help center and had gladly arrested his parents and ended up getting adopted by his new kind and caring parents.

After his foster parents finding out that he attempted suicide, they gave him the help that he wanted and comforted him. Spongebob sees himself as fake because all he does to himself was his force of laughter and happiness act kind.

:) ok i think thats all

(Got anythin else to ask lol? Its okay the ask box is always open for anything angsty or sensitive ones except for nsfw/t)

[idkimjustexistingsblog]

I suck at chess for one reason and reason only and that is I am bothe definition of insanity and fuck around and find out.

Like I know which moves are shit to make and witch moves are good make but I almost alwasy chose the shit move becuse a part of brain is just like yah but what if. Yah well lose but will they do? How will we fix it? That'll happen? Like the losing move is just so much more intresting to my brain than the winning move.

[og-danny-dorito]

[ Haikyuu!! Characters As Vibe Checked By Me But It’s Only The One’s I’ve Seen Before ]

i literally haven’t watched a single second of this anime but here’s my vibe check of the characters i’ve seen. might upload a part 2 but idk

✨🥕carrot boy🥕✨ :

- B A B E Y

- LOOK AT H E

- he smile,,, he p u r e

- arguably my favorite out of all of the ones on this list just because he’s so fucking CUTE

- i want to give him a gentle kith on the cheek and a juice pack and tell him he’s doing alright in life cause he looks like he needs daily doses of affection to function through the day

- a friend told me he looks scary when he’s mad and like?? i can kinda see it he has that vibe but not by much

- probably gay for the taller emo dude he hangs out with that calls him “boke”

- he looks like he doesn’t know where babies come from

- overal rating 1000/10 hes very cute

🦉 boy :

- idk who the protagonist is but i have a feeling it’s this mfer just from how weird his hairstyle is

- gives me golden retriever energy with a hint of fuckboy in there purely because people simp HARD for him

- why does he look like that though like??

- i’m not COMPLAINING like i’d let him hit it for free but why is he serving Owl Realness? bird entergy? like he was probably an owl in a past life and still gets scared when he sees foxes or big dogs

- he looks like he yells unintentionally

- probably gives really good hugs

- also has no idea where babies come from, but he has the decency to pretend like he does

- 9/10 solely because i dont like birds and he looks like one

✨wtf✨ :

- the only thing i know him from is that clip of him laughing and all i can say is: w h y

- ya’ll thirst over him,,, and for what?

- like yeah he looks like the only somewhat grown one out of this list so far but,,,

- there’s so many things that i have questions about and hypothetically i don’t think i’d be receiving good answers for them

- OH WAIT i also know him from that “oya oya” clip with owl boy

- i feel like i’d wanna fight this dude but get my ass BODIED within the first five seconds

- ive deduced that anyone who likes him probably has daddy issues no i will not be taking constructive criticism

- 5/10 i dont like the way he’s looking at me

tennis ball 🎾🏸 :

- i want to hit him.

- no like i dont think you know how strong my urge is to just clock this mf

- like you know the fight or flight sense? yeah im skipping that second one we goin straight to fight

- i dont know if he’s sleep deprived or only puts eyeliner under his eyes but regardless he looks intimidating

- from my extensive knowledge of anime tropes i have a feeling that he’s actually really sweet and kind and all that shit but like

- i dont know what it is about him that makes me want to throw hands but it’s there

- fuck this guy 4/10

✨🥕carrot boy’s🥕✨ brunette twin :

- EXACT same vibes as carrot boy but with a hint of chaotic dumbass in there

- he looks like he eats oreos by taking apart the cream filling and then putting the cookies back in the container for “later” when he’s just gonna leave them there for 3 months

- he kinda looks like a toned down doctor stone for some reason

- has short person energy

- also probably a twink cause like,,, look at him

- he’s not exactly pure but like he looks like he’s impossibly nice to people

- like he looks like people subconsciously adopt him left and right just because he gives off unguided child energy

- helps old ladies cross the street and is probably really good at taking care of children

- 10/10 very cute

michael? is that you? :

- kinda unrelated but why does michael jackson keep getting reincarnated as different flavors of anime boy? like is there a reason?

- hee hee lookin ass bitch 🕴🏻🕴🏻🕴🏻

- he looks like he moonwalks wherever he goes

- also apparently he’s a germaphobe? which like,,, same so i get it but at the same time he looks like the kinda dude to have about 50 of those little germ-x pouches hanging off of every bag he owns

- i can just tell from glancing at him that he’s dead inside

- look at those eyes. he’s seen everything the world has to offer and feels nothing now because of it

- calls people “filthy peasant” unironically

- 3.5/10 you’re just a mj in a different font but get a half a point cause i like your face

[ Thanks For Reading! ]

[rinringringu]

8, 42 and 99?

thank uuu

(i like how when i talk about the stuff i hate its longer skchidg)

8. Least favourite character?

mmmsjyxd i do not like chiaki at all... she is honestly the only character i hate in danganronpa ngl, and i dont understand the hype, i tired to see what people saw in her but i just cant get into nanami-love-train. in the game she is quite boring and like people really love to say that maki's "do you wanna die?" or nekomaru shit jokes are annoying and repetitive but are we gonna talk about how many times chiaki finished her sentence with "...i think.."??? also yea she is useful in class trials but not in a fun way? like a lot of characters accuse or say incorrect stuff during discussions but that just makes it more organic, or maybe there are characters who help you understand during the class trial, teasing to the correct answer but never out right saying It until the player gets it. and that's great! but chiaki dose none of that, from what i have seen. she looks like one of those tips that you click on and help you on those iq apps (idk if that made sense) a lot of people say "well she is an ai! she dosent have to have personality!!" ...monomi Is an ai too? and has a personality? junko in sdr2 is an ai too and hAS A PERSONALITY!! WHAT ARE THESE PEOPLE ON. DID WE PLAY ALL HE SAME GAME?? the fact that chiaki dosent have a personality its because even when she was alive she didnt have one, in the anime she is just more sAsSy (she is not at all but ok) also it dosent make sense how everyone missed her and idolized her in the anime??? she legit did nothing. she dosent even have a backstory wich is just??? what??? like no hard feelings people who like chiaki but why. there are a few more things i would say but i dont really have the energy RN.

42. Honest opinion on Tsumugi Shirogane?

oooooh now i talk about a character i actually love!!!! hehe.

ok im toooo tired to say all the stuff i want so just so you know i love her very much but i have some conflicting feelings and shes my fave mastermind (will update later)

99. Your absolute NOTP?

like i said before i despise chiaki and what i maybe despise even more Is hina/nami.

like excluding the fact that i am a firm beliver that hajime dosent have even an ounce of attraction to women, its just. so random, their in game relationship dosent make sense not only because well uh duh, she is an ai, but also bc they kind of... didnt care for eachother until chapter four/five-ish?? like yea they tolerated eachother but there isnt a real development to their relationship, just at a certian point, randomly, they are love interests?? for why and for what. the anime really shoved them down my and everyones troath and It was SO ANNOYING. it taked so much screentime away for actual good plot points, also when izuru cried for her i laughed and cringed at the same time.

but being a little more serious i dont think their relationship would last long, i dont think they could ever understand eachother, the romantic interactions they had did not feel genuine, and like being more superficial now but WHERE IS THE FLAVOR, WHAT IS THE DYNAMIC. I DONT TASTE ANYTHING, ITS JUST BLAND 😶

[sikereviewdotcom]

strawberry shortcake s2 ep1 - horse of a different color

this one was suggested by someone who couldnt keep their mouth shut and not sing the strawberry shortcake intro theme in the middle of our economy class

no one wanted to hear that, but they  went ahead and then i actually followed up on that train of thoughts i remembered about the fucking cartoons and i knew it pronto: its a must-see shit its like slightly above the level of magical school bus series, but the final rating is for the fin not the beginning so lets begin this horseshit:

were reviewing “horse of a different color”, it focuses indeed on strawberrys horse, honey pie pony (its her entire damn name, how sweet right? like all of them, i got diabete from this review but its the cost of maintaining this blog anyway, the kids are playing together on a that tree having fun jumping around like chimpanzees hooba hooba but sadly our filly quickly realizes she cant play king kong with them and keep falling on her ass,

yet since theyre all retarded or young (id say its a fifty-fifty case for them kinda normal ig, i mean they ARE literal 6yo) they try several ways of getting her up on that tree, not thinking how to get her down if they ever were to succeed (good for them: aint happening) its child labor too btw, from an horse still same deal what if honey pie fell down on them? crushing them corpses with her mighty pounds? the findus company would be delighted to hear such news, im sure its some quality (sweet ass) horse meat

once it all fails she understands a horse isnt meant to climb a tree, too big too fat its four legged, not even entertaining the relationship giraffes have with trees

but it aint over, then (after a talk with herself) hp hears the laughters of a bunch of kids which catches her attention, it always does who can ignore that sorta noise? although she aint annoyed by it shes just into the idea of riding a bike now, shes even gonna get a go at it oh yea thats it we finally found her human hobby gogdamn shes a backward furry

of course it fails aswell since she has no hand for the handle and shes heavy so i guess its the reason why she rides into w/e and cant stop? because otherwise she couldve also just.. actually it makes no sense does it? i mean she couldve easily stopped the ride actually how is that kid bike even holding her? ive never tried putting a pony on a bike for 6 y/o but i doubt about its capacity in not being crushed aswell as i doubt in the kids bones not being severely damaged after a visit under honey pies horsy buttcheeks

but all of that really makes her sad: she cant play with her human friends and shes the only horse around strawberry land or whatever see me tearing it for her, theres so much emotions in this episode especially after that filly trynna get kids to get into some horseplay horseshit like dude theyre only 6, lets go easy on them, might have a problem with the parents of the kids watching this episode no one even thought how fucked up this one part is? sure horseplay isnt only sexual or w/e but it still is the visual of 6yos on all four jumping around and neighing together with their ass a little bit too exposed wow im going on a dangerous road here? aint i? not gonna sue the writers im sure it was their subconscious speaking probably got issues from their childhood, eventually got them sorted out since 2004 what do i know? aside from me not caring

back on track : after seeing horsey being so sad the kiddos decide to get her a horse friend but where the fuck? they got no idea, they are proud nonetheless and go tell honey the good new until they are like “wait but we have no idea where to find horses!” ofc we get a big reveal, some serious strawberry shortcake lore: actually all the horses, ALL OF THEM FROM THE ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET are on one (1) single island: ice cream themed to diversify it all they are just chilling over there in ponyland and for some reason this one here got lost or idk guys she took the boat and checked the rest of the world out as an even younger filly, found strawberry and her friends and decided now she was a centaur  slash humanrry furry human, idk you get it but shes their friend and so on to introduce the concept of an AWESOME island full of equestrian activity and ofc ice cream but its kinda lame because who cares? everythings already made out of food, also why isnt the ice cream melting? its one water? nevermind for the introduction as i was saying, hp sings an horrendous sounding song it deteriorated my ear drums they got pierced or something  or maybe im exagerrating? either case horses cant sing:

so to the ice cream land they go, huh

of course it wouldnt be a big adventure without an almost broken bridge oh no whatever shall we do? could we possibly cross it safely? lets try it out  guys: yay it worked good for us little stress and suspense it was wack how they got honey pie out of the hole her big ass hoove made im mesmerized by the power of friendship and sugar at this point, just in full awe for the rest of the episode probably over dosed on all the ice cream flavoured horseshit, i got some all over my mouth its dripping on my desk i gotta clean that later

next thing we know: horses its all this episode is about (aside from labor) but you see, so far hp would switch between normal human language and neighing well turns out her other fellow equines can only neigh and so they just neigh together while our english well-spoken mammal translates to the moronic kids who just smile smuggly

of course the animals are having a welcome party then, dancing around while the morons are just bored, harsh one being a cartoon character isnt it guys? w/e theyre gonna ask for honey pie to come back home now, convinced that her natural habit isnt her place and she loves them too much to just leave them and never come back and break any plans they ever had together- oh shit looks like shes leaving forever huh? what a plot twist mark that on the bitch quota for today

the first one to leave is the little boy btw, important thing to note: hes the biggest pussy he cant even face reality: oh no, no more pony back time before sleep thats quite a bummer, downer and man how are they going to survive now they got no animal to watch over them? jesus theyre soon, on the boat (idk where they got it from idk why suddenly theyre on a boat because then theyre once again gonna cross that bridge but ok) anyway yea theyre having a relationship crisis during that ship trip yada yada ah and the bridge, because (see i do not call them morons for now reasons obviously they deserve this title not only because theyre 6 but also because they are just daft:) they proceed, once in the middle of the bridge all 4 of them, to stop and wonder

“will the bridge be able to hold all of us? wont it break? damn i wonder if it will crack” and they talks without moving until vlam: a tree comes and breaks it (dont ask) so now theyre in trouble:

back to ponyland: bitch pie realizes how much she misses her actual friends and that she can speak english which her other horse friends cant do so she is special and probably abnormal, shes a big outcat of the pony society and has no other reason but to escape her incoming death sentence for fraternizing with the humans of course none of the second part is true, she just wants to see the kids again so she says asta la vista baby to the neigher team and runs away see, she hasnt taken the boat and yet also arrive to the bridge? why a boat sequence then? i will skip this for now but it WILL play in the rating, imagine im the parent of the youngster watching this crap and i have to endure it

if it sucks this bad and is this illogical i might just get bored and change the channel, idc my progeny aint gonna be watching this in either case, ill make them watch political debates then interrogate them on what they learned after what but it wasnt actual political debates just random furry youtuber venting with their fursona sprites animated and thats how you make your kids retarded, the kick of this joke is that i aint planning on getting any kids but totally gonna make them watch classics too such as the attack of the killer donuts as soon as they reach 6 so they wont be dumb and probably not getting diabete or w/e in their adulthood

then honey pie saves the kids btw all of them, heavy shit

and they all go back to strawberryland, happily after a big “wow i missed you sm, you are my real friends w/e if you dont look like me i aint speciest guys really!” theyre all vegan too btw so this works for them i havent watched enough strawberry shortcake episodes to know if they ever eat meat but i have doubts seeing how theyre into a very cannibalistic diet which include eating dessert when obviously thats what they are at least half part, this cartoon raises a lot of political questions it may have a deeper value than i first attributed to it

the end: another terrible song plays about horseshit and how tasty it is

thats all folks

so the rating: big 6/10, so you know 5/10 if its a decent kid show where im highly eager to click on the x and get back making jams but nah

surprisingly enough, i only wanted to stop watching half of the episode and not the entirity of it so credits for thats since im an adult and not a kid, imagining kids enjoyed this sweet childish cartooness or w/e now why +1? its because of how many political questions it raised, how it made me think about our society and cakes yknow its more than kids having a conflict with an horse it talks about veganism, specism, handicap, cannibalism, the management of the limited ressources were exploiting and so on yea really makes you think, its subliminal messages to make kids smarter: they watch their dessert-imbecile counterparts doing bs and then get it right irl: good  ah- it also makes it better for you when youre watching this with your kid, you suddenly transcend to another level of spirituality, existential crisis activated or at least reasoning mode or w/e youre willing to name this the point is you arent bored still despite all of this i rated it quite low for such a serious kid cartoon what couldve possibly made me tic? 1) kids are morons and cant understand all of this, not clear enough for the targeted public 2) projection onto the characters/dialogues from the writers of their childhood traumas (the horse play event didnt go unnoticed, karren brown) 3) my little pony ripoff 4) its controversial, our society, especially in 2004 couldnt understand the depth of this shit and finally 5) i got so much ice cream flavoured horseshit all over my desk god help me this is so filthy what a fucking mess i would totally recommand it to anyone who feels like being blown away by the statements made in this work of art 6/10 but really we all know in the future, itll be a 9/10, some ahead-of-its-time-crap

tg, out

[wolfoblog]

been a bit

it has been some time sense i posted to my tumblr, after making that post a couple of months back i started to see things differently between life it self and what a relationship actually means to be a true one and where i had failed not only with freinds but with ones i care and love for, slowly but surely ive started to improve idk if the meds are really helping that much sense ive been on them a few months now and with my primary care doctor not being around where i go anymore to do checkups im not exactly sure if i should contiune the meds till their gone fully or just toss them as it can be harmful to stop them so soon without cutting the prozac into smaller doses, like i do feel better and less depressed but i feel their may be more then just depression that is causing me to act in such ways, ik its not that people arent doing enough as ive told kovo alot of times now i just feel like alot of the time i dont have that feeling to do rp with him at times or feel a need to be well “sexualy driven” to say the least, tho it may just be anxiety that could be  the cause of the issue and me just not being comfertable with my self as i still try to go through the proccess of transition from a male to a female and try to find doctors around where i live to get on hrt finaly, at least he is seeing that i am trying for him to make things right for both of us and working this out as a team instead of alone like before, i dont wana lose anyone else or any other freinds

moving stress- so 3 days ago my older brother and his wife and i finaly moved into our new place and across to a new town, first 2 days or so we were all just worn out and it didnt help that we had no gas or hot water for 3 days which made it hard to cook most food or even shower .3.” the fun of being sticky sweaty and smelling not great wasnt fun, then the other day i was tasked to fill our freezer with things that we had from family, my grandma gave us a little to much stuff idk where to even put half of this stuff rn as i type this out, but our freezer is kinda booby trapped rn because one thing after another comes out when we open the door to it and its small and cramped but we make it work, then last night we had a panic attack as my brothers male cat little bit was missing and he was starting to cry as he is a emotional support animal and a big part of his life, tho luckly we did find him after a hour of almost searching qwq, the big goof was moving around as we tried to find him which made it even harder on us

job hunting when you have mental disabilitys- the title says it all it becomes rather hard to do when alot of stress and anxity rolls over you all at the same time, for me it makes it hard for me to land and keep a job longer then a week or month at most as it can get to the point i cant handle it all, get sick by accident and get let go by the work company a day later or so, but i still try my best even if its a little money coming in as long as i can get somthing in to help my family out

i think thats all for now i just wanted to make a small update for the moment but hopefuly anyone who reads this has a wonderful day

nova

[spicyrose69-blog]

Hiveswap theory: Dammek is mentally ill

I would just like to warn you real quick, this is a lot of reading... So if you don’t like that then skip over this or get Siri to read it for you or something idk.

Also I would like to mention I am no therapist I am just going off of my own experiences and my research of it so keep and open mind. Oh also this has spoilers but if you didn’t know that I don’t even know why you looked at this.

So I have been looking at the fandom’s response to the fact that Dammek is actually an asshole and is abusing Xefros. I have heard multiple outlooks on this and how people view it. That it’s all one sided, that he is really using Xefros to basically make himself look better in comparison and even one that he is a double agent it’s insane. My point is, is that we all dunno what to think about this and if you are sitting there like “YES I DO DONT TELL ME WAT TO DOO U PEESS OF TRASHNEOGNROIGJOIRGNORGNO!!!!!111!!!1!” Then shut up and rethink it or at least read this and rethink.

Now I have heard some people just write this off as Vriska 2.0 or just a ctrl C + ctrl V of the Vriska situation and I am just going to go ahead and say that while their situations were similar they were not the same. But I will touch on that later with a bit of gravity falls input. So I’m just going to skip to the point and say that I believe he has severe paranoia.

I know that 90% of you are sitting there like: “YEAH WE ALREADY KNEW!” And the other 10% already left but for the 2 of you who are still here let me elaborate.

I’m not going to say the situations I was in because they are all kinda personal, but I will say that I have dealt with many people with Paranoia and Little parts of Dammek remind me of all of them.

One of these symptoms being Hypervigilance the feeling of being unsafe, and some go to an extent of an extreme of security and hoarding weapons that most people would view as DUMB OR UNNECESSARY!

One of these also include the sense of fear, mistrust or suspicion.

But the most important that I view, is the fear of being taken advantage of (Which I’m sure having a fish dictator dose not help.) and it can lead to even more fear, anger, betrayal AND MISTREATMENT OF OTHERS.

this one stuck out to me, because that is exactly what happened to Xefros. We can easily write off that he doesn’t care about Xefros or that he is getting but isn’t giving, because it is shown that he has pictures of him and Xefros all over his hive, He kept the birthday cake that Xefros made for him, Spent the time to make a mic for him and even made one of his personal passwords linked to his band with Xefros.

Going back to the Vriska incident, I believe that where it ties in is where they both genuinely cared about their pupils (In Vriska’s case it was Tavros in Dammek’s it was Xefros) it’s just that their methods were more than questionable, harsh and made it look like they didn’t care while they are only trying to help.

And that got me thinking about a show called Gravity falls where a similar incident happened. In the second to last episode of season 1, Dipper (One of the two main characters) was starting to think that his great uncle didn’t love him anymore because he felt like he was just his punching bag because he was being so tough on him. Later on in the episode he finds out that he was trying to help him so that one day when the world fights, he fights back. He was only using a bit of tough love. And that made me feel a connection to this problem.

The area where I think Dammek messed up is where his Paranoia was getting the better of him. And it turned into him abusing Xefros instead of helping. But yeah those were my thoughts on it and I really wanted to make this because while granted I did kinda wanna punch his face and still do and that this is not an excuse to mentally abuse your moirail but I also don’t think he is some villain either and that people with mental illnesses should never be named monsters because of it. I know this was serious as hell for a videogame but I do think this could be a lesson to teach people that yeah it is no excuse but it is no crime either. 

[identitycris1s]

A Very Frivolous Post

i had this thought during today’s yoga class when we were doing savasana LMAO anyway this lyricless music was playing and i was consciously trying to relax all my facial muscles (since u are supposed to) and that got me thinking about my face and what i didnt like about my face and so i started coming up with a list (pretty sure this isnt what youre supposed to be thinking about during savasana but anyway):

- my nose is too wide and flat

- hooded eyelids

- the space between my upper lip and nose is too long (ive only become cognisant of this relatively recently. combined with my flat nose (which just looks like nostrils sometimes) it makes sense why some ppl have told me i look like muffy from arthur or little foot from the land before time :((((((( which sounds cute but also is it really..........................)

- mole on my right jawline

- bumpyish skin

- sparse eyebrows

- wrinkly eyes

- disproportionate, legs are way too short compared to torso

- big thighs (yesterday nainai looked at me for a while and suddenly went “ni de tui ye shi hen da orh. then ni ye shi hei hei de.” OUCH. this was totally out of the blue lmao. but thats just how she is hahhhaha gotta love nainai. also i think she was trying to say my legs are big like hers. so we have that in common ThAnKS NAI NAI)

- thick ankles aka cankles aka the reason i cant wear cute shoes

this is quite sad. but also i dont exactly feel sad typing this stuff out....idk its not exactly tragic to not be 100% in love with the way you look. perhaps it just makes me less insufferable. this paragraph is full of double negatives. 

my point is - a healthy dose of reality wrt ones looks is not rly in vogue these days (ie the age of body positivity / loving yourself / “self care”.............cao mei zu is corright) but maybe its just true that we are not all beautiful and maybe thats ok and its not tragic. lets not go down the rabbithole of beauty standards cos tbh that bores me and leads to alot of ego stroking truisms like “everyone is beautiful” (sorry i disagree)

i suppose a healthy exercise would also be to list the things i like about myself (purely in relation to my outward appearance........things would get pretty dark if we went a holistic route. im not the best at self evaluation)

- hair is quite silky / soft

- big-ish eyes

- the space in between my boobs looks bony which gives me a skinny look (if you dont see my lower half LOL)

- my skin is way better than it used to be

- i like the way i look with a tan (but clearly nainai doesnt. see above.)

- straight teeth

........erps.....notice how the compliments are much more qualified and reserved as compared with the rather harsh and direct criticism..................but then again if you asked me to rate myself out of 10 i would say at least a 6 cos i think im above average but also im thinking most ppl would think they are above average no??? but not everyone can be above average so which ones of us are deluded???????

[captainshyguy]

god i love tcw, genuinely, but they really have those eps sometimes where its like ‘why the fuck should i care abt anything that’s happening here’ 

like...okay genuinely i love the show but there’s rly some stinker eps and i think a lot of the time its bc its a plot that has no relevance, and is focusing on characters that we dont give a shit about, like the droid arc??? no offense but who cares lmao, like r2 is great but like....in small doses, or WITH humans, not other droids we've just met??? like if we got that arc filoni had intended at some point, the one with rex and r2, like?? that’d probably WORK bc rex is one of the literal main characters, and seeing him interact with a side character we dont usually see him interact with is INTERESTING (esp since like...lbr whilst rex is in a lotta eps he doesnt get the same amount of focus that the jedi mc do lmao)

its like the ep where they get the replacement for r2 is fun, bc its shenanigans with ahsoka, anakin and rex, and its fun!! 

its just.... i think as well a lot of those stinker eps could be solved with just..a little more genuine character interaction....like characters actually TALKING abt stuff othe rthan the mission, like i GET its a war i get its literally the clone WARS i get it, but like...for example. besides having kit fisto swimming around half naked for 3 eps, the mon cala arc adds nothing substantial to the show at all (even though i think the prince is sweet)

like god okay anakin and ahsoka are both in that arc, why dont they talk more??? their lil padawan/master bickering would have given the arc a bit more gotdamn life, or idk, have padme and ahsoka having a convo!! 

nd i think like....okay they have goofy eps every now and again to offset the violence (tho still present in said eps) but i dont...enjoy most of them, bc they focus them on characters we dont rly...care about, like jar jar lmao and uhhh...again, r2 and c3p0 like i get it, they’re iconic characters, but they’re also not rly that engaging to follow around for like an entire 45 mins of screentime lmao

just....all they need is small bits here and there (i can deal with “landing at point rain” bc of the competitiveness between ahsoka and anakin when it comes to their droids killed count, throwing rex off the wall, all that!) just small bits to SHOW the idk...MAIN CHARACTERS interacting, and BLEASE figure out which characters of urs people actually like in tcw, like its not some random 4 droids and some annoying tiny frog man, its anakin, obi wan ahsoka, rex, a LOT of the clones we’ve seen (waxer fives echo, hardcase, hevy, 99, etc) maul, savage, hondo, satine, padme, ventress!

nd like...thats not even me being biased, clone centered eps/arcs are some of the most popular ones!!!! they’re fan favourites for a reason, bc clones are sympathetic and interesting characters, because of how different each one is!! bc their eps tend to be more character centric!!

like just!!! we need eps with characters we care about interacting with characters we care about more,  more of anakin and obi wan sassing each othe,r bc thats something that does get lost, (spekaing of characters we like interacting with others we like, its at least part of the reason why i actually like the zyggerian arc like...it LITERALLY has all 4 of the main characters in the arc together we needed so much MORE of stuff like that!) we need to see these characters being goofs together, or even somber moments, just!!! aaaaaa i just.....sometimes....i do think tcw’s huge cast of characters is a bad thing, it leaves characters stretched thin, like stop focusing on/introducing tons of new characters, instead, see which characters people like and WORK with that, FOCUS on the ones people love, make THEM interact, i get they couldnt have known which characters would actually become well loved but they also had 5 years to adjust accordling lmao, like!!

there’s some interesting pairs we could have seen interact but never do!!! we dont see anakin or ahsoka like...interact with most of torrent company, despite the fact that as the LEADERS of said company, they would have worked with them like through MOST of the battles during the war??? you’re telling me empathetic ‘clones are people too’ padme amidala wouldnt have got along EXCELLENTLY with fives, the clone with the strongest sense of self and individualism??? (i can see them talking passionately about clone rights in my head as we SPEAK)  you telling me padme never interacted with any of the people under her HUSBANDS command?? bullshit

like...it doesnt evne have to include clones, i actually really enjoyed that ep where padme and satine uncover corruption (i know fans arent a huge fan of that one), and ones with barriss and ahsoka because like!! these are characters we care about, ones we dont see interact all that often, and its fun! 

like. again, i’ll stress i do love this show, there’s a lotta genuinely good eps, INCREDIBLE EPS eps that are nice and fun or heartbreakingly dark and sad, very interesting, either way the’re all engaging and make me feel!!! (anything with domino squad members, innocents of ryloth, mortis arc, umbara arc, anything with hondo anything with maul and savage, mandolre stuff) but its not perfect by any means and i wish they changed those gotdamn unnecessary eps like the droid arc, anything with jar jar, uhh,,,the onderan arc honestly (first ep was good), the mon cala one nd just....put in more characters we cared abt at leas,t or made them interact or just!! something!!!!

just....i think tcw would have been perfect if they tightened the cast a bit, and added just a lil more interaction between the main characters just..sacrifice a little plot driven strytellnig for character driven storytelling, just a LITTLE