#dont bitch to me how this is a gay thing i know it is but guess what? its also smth asexuals do bc queer experiences arent stratified

[ratatatastic]

"Battle of Alberta, right? It was my first game: Calgary, Edmonton. We would play them in the preseason, and you know—trying to make the team I'd always be asking him to fight in preseason, always. I'd be runnin' my mouth—like, tryna fight the biggest, baddest guys, tryna make an impression.

And he would never fight me. He'd always tell me, like If you make the team, I'll fight ya. You don't have to worry about that, but I'm not fightin' ya preseason. And I totally respect it, I'm not gonna chase him down. It is what it is. He's established—I'm looking for my chance.

So I get called up, we're playing Edmonton in Edmonton: Battle of Alberta. [He's] over there on the other side, and it's like the coolest thing ever... you know, the buildup was crazy 'cuz I knew if the opportunity presented itself—if the game went the way I hoped it would, I would get an opportunity to fight him.

I remembered in warmups tryna skate by the redline initially just kind-of gettin' a feel for it—to see if I have to say something or whatever... He's got no bucket on, his big, bald head is glarin' around, he skates by the redline with the biggest smile on his face, and just gives me the biggest wink...

At that moment I knew Okay, he remembers. It's gonna happen at some point.

We were up 1, I think it was 2-1 going into intermission or whatever—Oh, no, I think it was 1-1 and we had just scored so the position I'm like Yeah, I don't know if I can fight him now because we have the momentum and we're winning the game. I don't want to lose a fight, then we lose a game and now I'm, like, never getting a chance again.

You kind-of gotta play the game within the game like [...] there's an opportunity to fight, and there's an opportunities where you shouldn't fight. Things weren't looking good, then they score and now we need a spark. I'm like Fucking perfect.

I just skate by their bench and I'm like It's time, big boy! He jumps out, we line up, and he goes We squarin' up or we goin' right away?

I'm like I'm not fuckin' squarin' up with you right now! We're goin' right away!

Drop em, we go right away, grab each other. I know he's a lefty so he's gonna let go—let's go of my right arm before he throws one. I threw one. Big boy went down, he jumped back up pretty quick. I don't know, I tell people all the time, I'm like I would've been in the league fuckin' 2 years earlier if there was good footage of this fuckin' fight!

For some reason—For some reason, the cameras cut out. I don't know if [he] had his cousins working the cameras or something that night, or if they're in the video room or what happened.

That was my first NHL game.

It's funny 'cuz Chucky was there—Chucky's there and he knows, he saw, he always laugh when I say that I would've been in the league earlier 'cuz he knows how things like that go. You get a little bit of energy and buzz around ya, and then kind-of momentum takes you a little bit further but unfortunate[ly], I missed that opportunity but I don't regret a thing.

[...]

The opportunity was there, I just—unfortunately, for whatever reason, the Hockey Gods said not yet." (Ryan Lomberg reminiscing over his first NHL game/fight) (x)(x) (please go watch the second link to see lombos giant smile as he tells this story jfc)

and other genuinely bonkers things to say about a hockey player in your first fight... like why did this need to be said like that...what

[distraughtlesbian]

literally the best part of this whole stupid book iwlove weird obsessed horndogs thee villain archetype of all time. he’s so silly. “we could’ve had a life together”, he says to his lesbian ex-neighbour who he’s just shot with a crossbow bolt meanwhile her girlfriend who he’s also just shot is half dead across the room. god i love it here he said me and the bad bitch im going to fumble

[gophergal]

Look. If you come onto my awful little blog and say "subzero and scorpion are brothers" as a way to deter me from shipping SubScorp, I'm just going to laugh at you.

That's like saying "shipping superbat is wrong because Clark Kent and Dick Grayson have an age gap"

Like. Dude. Bro. The ship you're arguing me on is not the ship I'm talking about. I get it, code names and titles shared between characters make shit REALLY FUCKING ANNOYING. But the Internet exists. You can Google things. I believe in you dude.

[coyoxxtl]

i think its funny that there’s people out there that get mad when you suggest that Light Yagami is ace and not gay, like i’m sorry y’all want him to fuck L so badly but even a gay boy would pretend to jerk off to bikini girl magazines.

[p2iimon]

drawing more furry fnaf art. yknow just to keep you posted. i love posting in the tags sorry these ones got away from me

[flower-zombie-rob]

Girl why do jk rowling fans gotta be so dense though

[daydadahlias]

jess i love that you have a cute lil gay outfit on. my fave aesthetic is "i need everyone to know i'm gay" and i think you're crushing it. 12/10 i would love to see your cow earrings 🥺

well this is the micro cow necklace i wear every day that i was talking about (which monse got me hehe) <3 but i will tack on my cow earrings for u too

[todayisafridaynight]

and if i think of jo being really good at extremely niche things for masato's sake who's going to stop me

[snekdood]

if me not being fake nice all the time is the reason ppl generally avoid me then whatever. id rather not walk around with a liar as a face.

[bastardizedbitching]

i’ve read two novels tonight it’s 3:31 am as i’m typing this if there’s a higher power fucking with us and running things down here i am staring at you and giving you the middle finger. i will become immortal using mcdonald’s preservatives and start slowly destroying the universe in seemingly innocent, harmless ways until everything we know is no longer recognizable and you will be left wondering how you lost control and the answer is ME BITCH. then i’ll make you into a giant egg eternals style and force you to die and recreate the universe but better because unlike you i don’t make the dominant species in a small pocket of my universe fucking ruin lives for shits and giggles. if there’s multiple people involved in running this shitshow i’ll do it chain reaction style everyone has to explode at the right time in order to make the new universe. and magic will be real and there will be a lot more good shit in the universe like FOOD. omigod food is so awesome. and the food won’t affect anyone’s health negatively which would be like. so sick. all of this will happen in a riverdale style plot where everything becomes more and more non sensical over time and you slowly go insane from the sheer weirdness of what is happening until you’re more insane than that guy in the mind electric. big mood honestly man sometimes you just need to sail out to your death that’s respectable goals. less respectable that you did this for your girlfriend but whatever romance is fine. kind of overused plot line whoever is writing this universe sucks at writing. change it up a little bit why aren’t enough people making musical masterpieces about that star trek shit huh. make a goddamn musical masterpiece album about those star trek concepts and then we have something new. or maybe here’s a better idea since there so much lovey dovey shit in there let there be music and let the music have GAY SEX where they are FUCKING RAW. as a certified singer bastard that’s a amazing concept. all these allo sexual folks describing the sex sounds and i have no idea what the fuck they are but if you have them MAKE SOMETHING WITH THE SEX SOUNDS. like y’all got so much to work with and no one is doing it it’s fascinating. take that first step. it only takes one person to start a trend of interesting shit. see there’s things like this in life now we gotta add some fucking horrors too but not the dull soul-sucking horror we have here with the government and capitalism and everyone wanting someone dead. PEACE AND LOVE MY DUDES. except for cops go fuck yourselves. see the universe writers had some interesting shit with my childhood where i hallucinated for a year when i was 7 we need more of that energy. not enough people these days lose their minds over non world ending shit we don’t need another disaster. actually while i’m at it WHAT THE FUCK IS THE GOP DOING?? some people really just turn off their brains and hear the most dogshit insane lies and parrot those statements word for word. sweetheart no that’s not the way go take some benadryl see the hat man expand your worldview and realize that not everything is about what is happening with our local stupid white karen assholes THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOU. honestly i’m pretty sure i got drunk off our vanilla extract i chugged a bunch of that shit. for fucks sake i mean it’s vanilla it should not taste spicy when i chug it. does vanilla minecraft mean nothing to you bastards?? hey another thing universe writers ever try fucking. MAKING NICE PARENTS. should not be up to half of my friends are on cps watch. i’d like to suggest some more of that peace and love 70s hippie energy. you wrote the goddamn protests live that truth. smoke weed and live a healthy stable life. now i understand perhaps you’ve been dropped as a child. or child abandonment. or parental murder. honestly all of those seem pretty common for god backstories so WE COMMIT TO THE BIT. however, consider talking your shit out. i’ve heard yoga does wonders. or a nice cup of tea. anyways peace out commit crimes be queer and disgusting about it feel the whimsy.

[dadsbongos]

do u think u could write some of ur own personal headcanons for laios? i love the way u write him, it seems almost canon!

anon you dont know what fire youre messing with

also thank yew hehe :>

general headcanons:

Laios likes babysitting but does NOT want to be a real papa, he adores the idea of being the Cool And Strange Uncle but just imagining having to raise a whole person from scratch terrifies him

Usually conks out as soon as his head hits the pillow and he’s a damn heavy sleeper, he strikes me as someone that gets the dad snore when he’s a bit older

Likes doing physical activity in the moment, maintaining his stamina/strength n whatnot. But HAAATES the aftermath, he will not stop bitching about how gross he feels when sweaty

People scare him but I think men specifically scare him more than women because he mainly associates “men” with his old boarding school and military peers and his dad. Meanwhile the most callous woman he’s personally dealt with is like. his mom… who wasn’t particularly menacing and he doesn’t seem to resent her as much as he does his father

Most definitely called Chilchuck “chil” in their early days together and got his nuts sacked for the unintentional disrespect

Doesn’t drink often because the taste bugs him but when he does decide to, he drinks to get drunk. So it has to be a special occasion

The type of older brother to tell Falin food fills up your body from your feet to your head and when you’re full to your head you die

modern headcanons:

Definitely the type to unironically use little emoticons like :) or :] but his favorites are the cute ones like :3 , ^.^ , and :0

Would’ve played barbies with Falin as a kid and enjoyed it more than Falin did lol

If he were out with the group (marcille would have to threaten his life though, he would HATE “going out”) and Marcille or Falin deferred to him to deal with creepy men he’d feel like a superhero about it

Borderline mandated to have a high impact phone case by Falin because he’s GOT to be dropping that shit all the time. I just know it (projecting)

Would probably dislike resident evil as a series but thinks the premises are cool

Bouncing off that: he’s a big Undertale and Deltarune fan (definitely had a thing for Toriel at some point and probably thought sans was kind of overrated). Has ambivalent feelings towards fear & hunger, likes the atmosphere and item preservation and monsters but the assault scenes and overt brutalism ick him out from recommending it

Would go his whole life without an autism diagnosis until eventually held at metaphorical gunpoint by his friends, just for his parents to go “oh yeah we had you tested as a kid but didn’t want you using it as a crutch”

If monsters weren’t real he’d be cryptid autistic just so everyone’s on the same page

Cryptids major and ocean creatures minor type autism

I don’t think he’s straight by any measure but before he has the Realization, he’s the epitome of the girls gays and coleman meme

Segue omg: he has no desire to think more about his sexuality or gender than “i feel x” or “i choose y”. I think he identifies as Man(TM) but in a “its harder to explain i want to be a bog” way. If you referred to him with feminine pronouns or called him “girl” he seriously wouldn’t give a shit 

nsfw(?) headcanons:

Could never do casual, you would have to be committed or only know each other VERY distantly and only do it once. His ass wouldn’t know how to read your relationship if you were trying to do friends with benefits (he’s also very concerned with hurting people’s feelings so just the notion of accidentally doing that to someone he’s intimate with would kill him)

May seem strange coming from a bitch always talkin about fucking him, but I think Laios would actually have kind of a lower sex drive. Like he maybe doesn’t get needy very often but also isn’t NOT in the mood, so if you proposition him and he’s into you he’ll be like “okie :3”

That being said, when he does feel needy he’s NEEDY. It’s debilitating, he genuinely can’t do or think of anything else until his poor wee is taken care of :( poor guy aww

I can see him being a virgin until his early-mid 20s and having no shame about it (good for him go king, virginity is nothing to be ashamed of it literally doesn’t matter)

Also by virgin i mean rice purity test score of like 97

Swears he doesn’t like having his cock worshipped (says its weird and embarrassing) but he’s so flustered n drooly and babbles the whole time

Biter 

[h3arts4harry]

- its not your fault -

-

warnings: angst with happy ending, fluff, social media being a meanie☹️, idk

summary: billie and y/n reveal their 5 year relationship to fans and it doesn't go as they hoped it would

-

Billie and i had been friends since we were 7. we were inseperable to the point when we weren't together people would ask where the other was, and we always knew. on my 17th birthday billie took us to a lake in the forest, we had a picnic, swam, and laid under the stars. that night she asked me to be her girlfriend and of course i said yes. now 5 years later billie wants to tell the world about how she has 'the most perfect girl ever' in her words, in all honesty shes wanted to post about us since the start. the only thing stopping her is me, ive been too scared. fans can be crazy and i dont think i could handle if people hated me, sure they know and like me now but that's as 'billies best friend' and i still get a little hate from that.

"cmon baby pleaseeee, i hate that i cant post about you" billie pleads from next to me, "i dont know bils.. what if they hate me?" i question placing the clean dishes away in the correct cupboards, "why would they hate someone who makes me soooo happy" she smiles wrapping her arms around my waist placing small kisses around the base of my neck and shoulder. i swiftly turn and face her, wrapping my arms around her neck, i lean in and place a kiss on the tip of her nose "okay", her smile widens "yea? really?" i nod not being able to hold my smile from the joy on her face, "yeah lets do it" "i love you i love you i love you" she repeats covering my scrunched face in kisses.

liked by itsssy/n, drewstarkey, others

billieeilish letting you in on a little secret.. who would've thought🤷‍♀️

comments..

itsssy/n: i love you <3 billieeilish: i love you more <3

quenblackwell: finallyy, yall these 2 r the cutest istg liked by author

zoedonahoe: my favourite gays liked by author

madelyncline: so cute!! liked by author

madisonbeer: im so happy for you guys <33 liked by author

user1: OMFG???

user2: AHHH WHATTT

user3: ugly ass clout chaser, kys finneas: ur disgusting

user 4: ew wtf that should be me

user5: OUR GIRLS ARE IN LOVEEEEE liked by author

user6: billie you could've chosen anyone, literally anyone is better than whatever that is eugh itsssy/n: real

user7: shes so fat wtf

liked by billieeilish, quenblackwell, others

itsssy/n SURPRISE SHAWTYYY

comments..

billieeilish: mine mine mine itsssy/n: yours yours yours

tarayummy: so happy for you girls!! liked by author

christophersturniolo: bestie is in love itsssy/n: deeply😔

madelineargy: QUEENS OMG itsssy/n: says u (ily)

matthewsturniolo: happy 4u dude itsssy/n: thanks dude

maggiembaird: so happy that you two are finally telling people, you girls mean to world to us<33 itsssy/n: love you maggie <33

larray: bitch hit the jackpot (ily) itsssy/n: yes yes i did💁‍♀️ (ilyt)

user8: FHDSIFI WHATTTT

user9:its giving clout chaser nicolassturniolo: girl stfu💀 liked by author

user11:i bet shes just using our bils, she deserves sm better

user 12: ill pray for you, sinners. user5: brother eughh

user14: couple goals omfg liked by author

user13: no no no no noooooo

-a week later-

"y/n baby?" billie peaks through our bedroom door "hm?" i pear over the thick covers billie walks over sitting next to me leaning against the headboard, i lay my head on her chest and her hand instantly wraps in my hair. "whats going on with you?" she asks lowering her head slightly to look at me, "nothing" i mumble hiding myself in the covers a little more, "uhuh" she pushing the cover out of my face, "talk to me, whats bothering you" i stay silent for a moment before speaking up "i urm- have you seen the comments?" i ask sitting up next to the worried girl, brining my knees to my chest "theres so many posts about us, an-and its exactly what i was scared of billie, if not worse"

billie had seen a few comments on both our posts. she tried to delete as many as she could but there was no way she could get through them all. her heart physically hurt knowing that her fans, the people that were supposed to support and love her, would treat someone she cares for and loves so deeply with such hate. it made her sick to think about everything posted to the public to see about her girl.

billie stands in the kitchen, racking her brain for ways she could help y/n. she ends up calling her brother, finneas; "hey bil whats up?" "i-i dont know what to do, y/n hasn't left our room in a fucking week and i dont- ive tried everything she wont leave" "woah billie slow down whats going on?" "y/n, she hasn't come out our room in a week, she said before that she was scared this would happen and i- i told her, i fucking promised her it would all be okay, that they would all love her but- i dont know what to do fin" "everyone that's hating is so obviously jealous" "i know that but i dont think she does, ive told her again and again but its like she doesn't believe me" "i wish i could help billie but im slumped, i never see hate on Claudia so i wouldn't know" billie groans before saying bye and ending the call.

the anger in her rises as she paces around the living room before posting on her Instagram story

-the next day-

im scrolling through tiktoks, basically all of them being edits and videos of billie, the odd one being a hate vid on me before i scroll upon a sad edit of me and billie. its cute but sad, containing old clips of me and billie when we were younger, a few being from the last couple of years. the caption being 'billies insta story was so sad to read, i have never hated on y/n and for billie to have seen so many people hating to post that is honestly heartbreaking.' i open the comments to see everyone agreeing with the caption.

myb0ybillie: our girl was so happy but seeing how much hate y/n got was crazy

y/n4ndb1lliee: they've been the cutest ppl ever i couldn't believe ppl were hating

wherearetheavacad0sss: loved y/n since billie first posted with her, sickening to see how ppl are treating her

it warmed my heart a little to see that some people actually did like me, and by some i mean tat post had around 21k comments on it, basically all saying the same thing.

the door creaks open slowly, billies head poking through before stepping fully in seeing me awake, "morning baby, how are you" she sits next to me on her side of the bed, "im okay, look at this edit" i nod passing her my phone, she faintly smiles watching it, the same as i did. "this is so cute" she mumbles scrolling through the comments, "mhm" i hum as she passes back my phone, i turn it off and sit up slightly leaning against the headboard with my hands in my lap. "i was wondering i you wanted to come out for a drive with me? just to get out of the house for a bit, get some fresh air?" she suggest looking down at me, rubbing her hand up and down my upper arm. "i dont know bil.." "come onnn, ill drive and we'll play your favourite playlist-" "my favourite playlist is literally all of your songs" "meaning you get a free live performance" she chuckles jokingly nudging my shoulder. "mkay fine, but let me shower first" "yesss okay baby, go shower, i love youuu" she drags out as she leaves the room.

i shower, get dressed into some sweats and her hoodie, slip on my uggs and walk out to see billie in the car, leant over the back seat. i open the passenger door and sit down, immediately pulling the seatbelt over me. "what are you doing?" i ask looking over to her now sitting down properly, "i have a surprise" she giggles, shes loves always surprising me with things. billie takes my phone and connects it to the Bluetooth, passing it back to me. i open spotify, pressing on my playlist hitting shuffle. a small smile spreads on my face as my favourite song starts to play 'bitches broken hearts'.

we sing along to billies songs, driving for a couple hours before billie pulls into a random field. "why are we here?" i furrow my eyebrows turning to her, she smiles brightly "close your eyes" i shrug and do as she says, i hear her get out and run around the car opening my door helping me out. she guides me walking down to the end of the car before i hear her open the boot, she ruffles about for a minute before standing next to me, placing her hands lightly on my waist. "open" she whispers in my ear, i look to see the back seats laying down and the whole trunk converted into a comfy bed, snacks and drinks placed in a cute basket on the side. my eyes widen and my jaw drops with a gasp, my hands quickly covering my face "omg billie this is so cute" turning around to face billie who still has a bright smile, i wrap my arms around her neck, peppering her face with kisses "i love you i love you i love you" i say inbetween, she laughs grabbing my chin, pulling me into a kiss "i love you too".

we lay there talking about everything and nothing for hours, watching the sunrise.

a moment of silence goes passed before billie breaks it "im sorry y/n" she looks down, "no" i bring my hand to her jawline, making her look at me "its not your fault bil" "i know not technical-" "no not technically, not at all" "but i-" "billie." "hm?" "none of it, and i mean not one bit, is your fault, please understand that" she just nods, pulling me in closer. we continued to watch the sunrise until i fell asleep cuddled into billies side.

-

first time adding insta posts/stories so lets hope they work 🙏

as always feedback is appreciated <333

THANK YOU FOR READING

LOVE YOU HOES

taglist:

@m0r94n @sturnzsblog @junnniiieee07 @chrisgetsmewetterxo @raysmayhem-72 @sturniolo-slvt @mattspolitank @cerismo @chrispotatos @ncm9696

[nor-4]

Formula 1 Incorrect Quotes with reader Two

F1IQ - Part One

Y/n: Bitch why don't you shut the fuck up before i slit your throat and watch the honor roll out?

Max: Are you threatening me??

Y/n: No, I'm hitting on you, flash me a titty bitch.

Lewis: Yeah uh, there's something I've been wanting to say lately.

Y/n: Oh what's that?

Lewis: The N-Word

Y/n looking at toto: Look at your dad. Such a dork, keeping bees.

Y/n: I mean atleast it's interesting though. At least like, i wish my dad kept bees.

Y/n: I mean it's kind of cute. Like, your dad keeps bees.

Y/n: How old is your dad? He's obviously beekeeping age. I dont know. I think It's kind of sweet.

Y/n: George, i wanna fuck your dad.

George: Oh really?

Yuki: Hey can i sit with you?

Y/n: Why

Yuki looking at stroll and ocon: The kids at the other table keep throwing ketchup packets at me.

Y/n: You're not covered in ketchup, though

Yuki: They don't know you have to open it first

Y/n: Damn. We need remedial bullying class too.

Yuki: So how do you like your remedial english?

Y/n: I guess it's whatever. My mom was really pissed, though.

Yuki: Yeah? What about your dad?

Y/n: My dad killed himself.

Charles: I'm finally seeing someone good for me.

Alex: Omg who is it?

Charles: A therapist

Y/n: max is pissing me off *20 minutes ago*

Y/n: nvm just got dicked down

George: Girl what..

Fernando: Every time i talk to you i feel confused.

Fernando: I've never met anyone that speaks like you do

Y/n: Stop lovebombing me

Fernando: what? It's not a compliment

Fernando: You scare me

Y/n: What are you hiding from me?

Zhou: Nothing..

Y/n: Zhou Guanyu.

Zhou pulls out a cat: The cat distribution system chose me okay

Y/n at drive to survive: If he cheats on you, put hair remover in his shampoo, you wanna act like Andrew tate, u gon look like him too.

Lewis wearing a beanie: I CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS FOREVER

Toto: That's your fault. Being too quick signing your seat with ferrari

Oscar: Are you high?

Lando: Am i what?

Oscar: High

Lando: Hello

Christian: So what could a Mercedes principal possibly have then?

Y/n: I just feel like he'd be into satan-worship, or at the very least have a sex diary.

Christian: A toto wolff sex diary would be horrifying. He's like our rival.

Y/n: We say that about Stephen king books, we still read those.

Daniel: "Dear diary, hot candle wax hurts so good"

Christian: No it'd probably be like a thesaurus of words for "Good"

Daniel: Yeah he probably sexts with perfect grammar.

Y/n: "My wife showed an exquisite exhibition of lust for me."

Toto: Let me try something different here. Do you guys have thoughts and feelings for one another?

Y/n: Uhh i think George's kinda spoiled

George: And i feel like y/n's a bitch

Y/n: What're you gay?

Alex: What.. How did you know? I've never told anyone that.

Y/n: Dude look at your hair dye, you're either gay or color blind.

Lance: bro stop chanting in dead language's your scaring the hoes

Y/n: Bitch you is so lonely I'm summoning the hoes

Sebastian: You used to be shy, now you're a whore

Y/n: There's a thing called character development

Oscar: Reminder that I'm very sweet and endearing so be nice to me

Carlos: or what

Oscar: or I'll punch your lights out

Hey yall this is a bit short cause I'm finna make a random crack twitter posts n I'll post it in the most random day. I love yall baby💋

[tomwaterbabies]

disneyland happenings

featuring varian and hugo. since thats what our costumes were

^(us trying to be very spooky) (there is a lot below btw lol)

someone asking if i (dressed as hugo) was from atlantis. surprisingly this only happened once

we went to kingdom hearts mickey first bc that was gonna be a popular one the rest of the night. the idea of varian in kingdom hearts is definitely really funny. i do not go here im just being honest

OH. new addition to the costume. i had olivia with me as a shoulder friend

met bruno from encanto who commented on her. we talked about our rodent friends he was very nice. he said he brought "all 200" of his rats with him and wanted to help feed them and knows mickey is a big mouse so maybe we could ask him. i said we could just steal some food. varian got mad

went over to see sid from toy story because he seemed like a mean little bitch. he was a mean little bitch. i may have said that his creations could use a little work but thats no reason for him to say "your mouse needs a little work" and "i hope you kept the receipt".... cunt

laughing about how mother gothel was no longer part of the characters to meet. "they killed her forever this time" etc etc

watching the parade and varian almost jumping out of his skin when mother gothel was in the parade. her ghost

we went to this thing called villain's grove which was a bunch of light and effects n stuff through their little forest area. it was mostly a cool immersive experience so most of the footage is on the Lights And Effects Themselves but here's a few of us that look cool lol. gay tunnel (maybe not) (that segment was themed after frollo)

met hans from frozen. we absolutely had no clue he was going to be there it was pretty funny. you may guess that my friend @kristoffs-lullaby (varian cosplayer) is a frozen enjoyer. so we hopped in line to see him

hans asked if varian's alchemy balls were some sort of magic or enchantment and you'll Never guess what varian responded with

though explaining its alchemy and science and all that didnt really make him feel better. he even asked if its something that would be in danger of bringing in an "eternal winter". varian did not like that :)

saw dr. doofenshmirtz (?) i didnt watch that show. he was pretty fun to meet though. i know some people dont like his creepy ass design, but i do, its fun and weird to me. he wanted to collaborate with me and varian since we're scientists. really funny to have him say "i'll have my people call your people". a possible strange message that rapunzel will get later /j

also encountered hades. though our friend @iammisswow was with us and so i had him focus on her since shes a big hercules fan. the visual was hugo getting this scary man's attention to be put on someone else by calling her out. it worked obviously. "oh SHE is a HUGE fan of hercules"

madam mim from sword in the stone didnt really have as big of a crowd so we actually talked with her a pretty good amount. shes SO fun. lots of discussion about magic vs science and how she thinks knowledge is stupid. you can imagine how we of all people felt when she said "KNOWLEDGE is not power, MAGIC is power". she also liked olivia (she thought she was a familiar)

meeting judge doom from roger rabbit was kind of scary LOL. very intimidating man. but his area had vats of chemicals and all that so you can imagine we had fun with that. WE can be trusted. obviously.

nervously just nodding our heads as judge doom tells us to come to him if we have any information regarding where "that rabbit is" (we are not doing that)

and also we saw ernesto de la cruz from coco. we were actually able to catch him right as he started performing which is rad but i dont actually have any interactions to tell u about here it was bad ass though

and, unbeknownst to Hugo (as in i also didnt know about this), varian had a surprise for him. he had a whole... horribly genuine and flustery spiel to say about messing around in his lab and all that and made something for hugo. which was a necklace with a piece of colored glass-like material (teal) in the shape of a heart. hugo handled that whole situation really well (lie)

ANYWAYS ! that's it. i've mentioned before but Disneyland Trips will be retired really soon since I'm not too fond of a lot of their wack shit right now, but wanted to share some of the last bit of enjoyable times to be had there before that happens

[emperorundying]

💀The Locked Tomb Dashboard Simulator Part 4💀

🤐 necromancer-confessions

Anonymous asked:

i'm a third house non magic user and i've started hanging out with more necros lately and... i think i didnt realize how much of hanging out consisted of talking about the eroticism of the flesh !! and i dont want to judge them but u hear the words 'viscera' 'adipose' and 'sounding' in the same sentence one too many times and u kinda wonder why yr there as someone who cannot manipulate nerves :( ig im just feeling kind of left out

#anon this is totally regular for necros esp 3rd housers #if they dont understand that you feel left out, maybe have one use their necromancy on you? #there are many ways to assemble a skeleton

(112 notes)

💉 se7en Follow

bc these have been going around :3

( 1,829 notes )

💀 6ske-le-un9 Follow

#SOOOO SICK OF SPIRIT MAGICIANS IN MY INBOX ACTING LIKE THEY KNOW BONES BETTER THAN ME #get boned bitch grrrrrr

(1,002 notes)

♱ midnighthagette Follow

this edible aint shit

♱ midnighthagette Follow

why is the seventh saint to serve the emperor undying under my bed.

💎 saintofawe ☑️

Again with the insaneposting? How unfortunate, Harry, I thought we were past this.

(21,871 notes)

🐱 cohortcatgirl Follow

V important thread!!!

Idc how much anon hate i get 4 this, we need 2 be able to appreciate the loving hand that guidez us💗

#sick 2 my stomach seeing all of these posts against the necrolord prime without knowing the context of the beautiful things he's done for us :((((((( #mr undying i am yr biggest fan u deserve better than this....

(2,023 notes)

👤 foundations-of-decay-deactivated-8172202

if one more person unprompted asks me for blood pics again i swear to the bones above i will stab myself or smth

🩸 ab-justmytype-o Follow

stabbing pics queen?

(9,308 notes)

[gayelderstourney]

OLD MAN YAOI BRACKET ROUND 1

Propaganda:

Bob Zanotto/Helmut Fullbear:

THEY LITERALLY MADE MR CRY THE FIRST TIME I PLAYED THE GAME. THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH AND THEY FINALLY GET TO BE HAPPY TOGETHER. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO ME.

they are married in canon and are epic and amazing. they had sad canon events where bob thought helmut was dead for like 30 years or something but helmut WASN'T dead his brain was still alive and they are reunited in the game first by way of stealing an evil dictator's body and then later on they put helmut's brain in a ball as a temporary fix while they go out to find his body which has been frozen in ice. the game forces you to walk through bob's memory of saying his vows at their wedding ceremony and it's seriously some of the most romantic and heartwarming shit i've ever heard, especially "just when i thought i was turning to seed, you made me bloom again" like my god. i love them

they're gay and old as hell!!!! there's a level dedicated to their wedding!!!

Helmut is voiced by Jack Black and is currently a brain in a ball, and Bob knows him so well that the mental image of him in his drunken mind says things Bob KNOWS the real Helmut would never say. Also Helmut is temporarily in the body of a guy voiced by Elijah Wood-

Craig Cuttlefish/DJ Octavio:

well you see they used to be friends but were on opposite sides of the great turf war. cuttlefish gets a 14 year old to go stop octavios army. also they argue in splatoon 3 which is just part of the 100+ year divorce arc BUT AT THE FINAL BOSS IN THE JAPANESE VERSION THEY SHARE THE ICONIC LINE THAT CUES THE CALAMARI INKANTATION AND IN THE ENGLISH CUTTLEFISH TELLS OCTAVIO TO "HIT IT" AND START THE MUSIC AND MUSIC IS SO IMPORTANT TO THE SPLATOON UNIVERSE YAAAAA ik its grasping but its lovers to enemies

Literally I have seen so many people call this old man yaoi.

Old men divorce!!!

They're old men who made their divorce the problem of every young person in their lives <3. 100 years ago during the Great Turf War between inklings and octarians, Craig and Octavio were the chosen ambassadors of their respective species. They got along well, but unfortunately found themselves on opposite sides of the war. During one of the battles Craig shot Octavio in the heart. The inlkings won the war and the octarians were forced underground. For years afterward both men grew bitter towards each other, and eventually Octavio attacked the new Squidbeak Splatoon (a group of secret agents recruited by Craig). Octavio lost both times and got imprisoned in a giant snow globe (and Craig calls him cute). In the latest game Octavio got over his hatred for Inklings (Craig's species) and used his flying mech to help defeat the BBEG of the game. After the final fight, Craig said something to the effect of 'that old rascal turned out to be not so bad!'.

Alright ok hear me out! These two old men have fought in wars for their races against each other and have the craziest pathetic old man homoerotic tension ever. They like, went from at least respecting each other before the war and then they were forced to fight each other and then when Cuttlefish's side won, Octavio went underground like a pathetic lil wet cat and later on he kidnapped Cuttlefish because of game related reasons and both of them still have way too much homoerotic tension!!! And then Octavio gets owned and then in the second game Octavio decides that "Hey actually, lets kidnap Cuttlefish's granddaughter" and the old man isnt even there cause hes busy being a pathetic old man in the under-underground!!! And in the third game they go fron rival/enemies to reluctantly working together to save the world from actual extinction bc some durry bitch wants to cover it in fuzzy ooze and like, both of them have so much old man ship potential and just- theyre still pining for each other even after over a 100 years man,,,,

I personally headcanon Cap'n Cuttlefish as homophobic, but I see the ship a lot and think it's funny.

They’re both at least like 125 probably a bit older, they are so divorced, like peak lovers to enemies back to lovers, Cap’n Cuttlefish calls Octavio cute in Splatoon one immediately after you rescue him from Octavio kidnapping him? So dysfunctional, so gay, so old

They fought in the Great Turf War which was said to be over 100 years ago, Capn Cuttlefish was, well, a captain I believe (he had some sort of rank even if he wasn't a captain, like he led a battle that's singled out in the sunken scrolls of the first game). they act so divorced in the singleplayer mode like they cannot stop insulting each other specifically but octavio always comes back and like kidnaps or insults captain cuttlefish it's so. and when the great zapfish gets stolen in splatoon 3 captain cuttlefish is like "it's the octarians again i know it" like divorced behavior. also it wasn't this time and octavio gets super weird about it. maybe you should stop using children as props in your drama though.

my favorite war crime divorcees <3

They basically are friends to enemies to lovers. Both of them fought in a war that hurt DJ Octavio so bad he can’t become an inkling.

friends -> enemies -> lovers. what more is there to say

they are soooo divorced

they were so gay their breakup ended a war

Craig Cuttlefish got sucked dry by a bear

they got divorced but then they got remarried . they fuckinf hate eachother but they also make out sloppy style and i do not know how that works because neither of them have mouths in their swim form which they are both permanently stuck in. love wins but also loses at the same time with these fucking losers

they are sooo divorced omg. istg they were dating when they were younger and then war n shit happened and now theyre bitter exes who probably still make out sometimes. Makes it so much funnier that theyre old ass men (both over 100!) and Cuttlefish has grandkids

They were on opposite sides of a war and still fell in love