#don't get me wrong here folks
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Back here again with my unpopular opinions (aka me being silly), but I don't see "love" being the main motivator for some of Vegas' or Pete's actions post-canon.
There's this trope in romance stories, as far as I can tell, of people committing heinous acts out of love for their partners, and I'm sure the VP fandom sees that as something VP would do - I've read fics with that concept, mostly either Pete or Vegas getting kidnapped and the other saving them, and I love some of them, I have no problem with the trope and it being applied to VP.
However
I believe the key motivator of VP protecting one another or, for lack of a better phrase, becoming monsters for the sake of the other is desperation, not love. Specifically, desperation to hold on to that fragile reality they built for themselves through literal blood, sweat and tears.
(Even during canon, like, Pete shooting the main family guard when he shot Vegas was, besides an act of fury, an act of desperation. He had *just* managed to save Vegas from death and suddenly, all his efforts were rendered useless.)
And it's funny to say that when Vegas kept insisting and will keep insisting Pete should leave him, but to me, what I said above applies here, too:
Pete is desperate to protect Vegas and their little family from everyone else. Vegas is desperate to protect Pete from himself.
#don't get me wrong here folks#VP love each other#(even if Pete will never say it hehe)#I'm just saying it's a little more complicated than that#which most VP fans already know but still#this is the second time The Shape of Water has given me Pete thoughts it's not cool#I want to finish the bloody book not soak in it for reasons that aren't directly related to it#(though I do appreciate the brainworms thank you)#vegaspete#meta post#when the love is there but so is anxiety#and both get combined and guide your ill-advised actions#or something like that
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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pull of the tide
#artists on tumblr#how is summer almost over#it was just june#it should be like mid july now not august#don't get me wrong i like autumn#it's just crazy how fast time is going#i'm not ready for winter again#it's dire out here folks
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#good grief im gettin a lil tired of seeing 'DONT DO THIS' kinda art videos#i very much understand its a youtube thing and that clickbait names and thumbs get the views and attention needed#but it doesnt mean it doesnt annoy me or that I cant be annoyed by it#sometimes i just see it in tutorial pictures too#but the large DONTS with red Xs near the supposed ''wrong'' way of drawing is so demotivating#people start and draw in many ways than one#its what makes art their own#but when videos or tutorial posts are made and show the ''WRONG'' way to go about it#its like scolding the new artist or long time artist with that style that they're doing it wrong and that its bad#no matter the intention its not the way to go about helping artists learn to draw#and in my personal opinion#the click bait ''DONT DO THIS WHEN DRAWING'' thing is what keeps me from actually watching the vids#i get theyre probably helpful but i don't like that I have to feel some NEED or DESIRE to click on a vid cause I feel like I did a thing#wrong or that i never should have done it at all#i wish i could see more 'here are some tips that helped me#kinda vids cause yes i would love to learn what helped you rather than being or feeling wronged for drawing in a way that isn't theirs#im rambling but i have been seeing a lot of 'DONT DO THIS' NEVER DO THIS' 'IF YOURE DOING THIS STOP NOW' kinda art vids#im speakin for myself here#but im an artist sifting through art youtube or spaces always willing to learn new ways of improving my art#i dont need to feel click baited like the next 3am don't this kid to learn how to improve my inking skills#if it was more a 'this is my personal preference and I wanna share it with my audience and maybe teach some things' kinda vid#id watch that too#but im just so tired of seeing art youtube going down this need to tell folks 'YOURE DOING IT ALL WRONG. THIS IS THE RIGHT WAY"
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autistic people deserve so much better than they get. we all deserve far more than this.
#and by this I mean anywhere#online#in real life#here on tumblr#other websites#everywhere#we get treated like shit over and over#ignored#told we're unreasonable or weird or don't care#people act like we don't feel things the way they do#that we're childish or too sensitive#or that we're cold and callous#everything adds up to say: you're not like me and I have a problem with that#what an unfair way to treat so many people#independent and non independent#what cruelty people bring to bear on people who didn't fucking ask for it#and furthermore: I loathe the way people talk down to autistic folks as if we're not aware of a subject. or if we get something wrong we're#treated as straight up evil and malicious#rather than the often-true reality: that's a human error
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Thank You!
Big shout out to @silver-samurai @kdval @eurodyne-d & @baublekute for all your amazing artwork, showing up all 7 days, and being the only 4 people here! 🧡 I know it was a small crowd, but I appreciate you all and you're all crazy creative. I really loved seeing what each of you came up with for the prompts. You all are rock stars! Thanks for indulging me and this silly event.
Thank you to the folks who were able to support participants! We appreciate you too.
If, like me, life was kicking you in the shins this past October and you weren't able to get your artwork done on time, you still have until Nov 30th to ping me for entries.
👻
Thanks again and I'll see y'all around.
#will i do this again next year...?#tbd#this wasn't that difficult to organize but...#while i wasn't expecting a massive amount of people#turnout was abysmal despite the initial interest#showing up empty handed to your own party sucks#and i'll be honest it's a bummer when almost none of your friends or acquaintances show up either#i get it we're all busy and creating stuff operates on its own timeline but still#less then 10 people which was the minimum turn out i was hoping for#i'm very grateful for the folks that were here but i'm still disappointed and i don't know if this is worth doing again#tell me i'm wrong#maybe i'll be back#we'll see how i'm feeling#fright night city 2024#fright night city#cyberpunk 2077
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every day I wish tumblr culture had glommed onto any fucking ballad other than tam lin
#maybe it's the magical pregnancy. but it is really not my favourite. there are so many other weird and wonderful folk songs#why is it always that one??#where my long lankin aus at? you could go back to the og version where he was a wronged tradesman!#or matty groves!!! a million times more drama and romance#don't get me wrong i love a protean myth as much as the next guy but bleurghhh then there's Everything Else#and the way i feel like the main interpretation here is running so close to the same girlbossification as the persephone myth#folk blogging#mind you tumblr child ballad takes often make me hiss angrily because of the underlying assumption that they're all#~~~celtic independence~~~ songs as if england had no rural working class culture of its own
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😭 Incredible start to this very good article.
#the bear#the bear fx#the bear hulu#don't get me wrong i love this show#i love sydney adamu with all my heart and carmen berzatto...is certainly a character that exists#but jaw portrays him with such tenderness#and richie jerimovich is the babiest girl#season one was extraordinary#this is all just very sad#i remember reading an article in like 2022 and this very bitter very old guy wrote paragraphs upon paragraphs in the comments#just ranting about how terrible he personally finds the show#i blame this on him#his voodoo takes a minute but it is strong 😭#now how do we get ayo edebiri out of here#oh alsooo while i'm here let me pour one out for the sydcarmy folks#i hope the lot of you enjoy copious fanfiction for the foreseeable future#because you have it rough#i don't know why i just can't get into this ship#but i imagine if i was? after this season? i'd be dead
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#RIP to the legacy post editor. you will be missed. while queueing this post and the last one it's removed the option for me to switch to the#old one and is making me use the new one. which is like not bad. it's not a bad editor. i just don't like change as most tumblr users don't#it also just appends the post you make directly to the top of the currently-displayed posts behind it even if it's not meant to go there#which is a little bit scary when i'm on the queue page and i click “add to queue” for a post that's supposed to go up on august 18th#to see it immediately appear above mega metagross. the legacy post editor didn't do that. it made you refresh the page if you wanted to see#your own new post on the dashboard. which i think was better!! honestly!! i've never Made a post using the new editor to see how it behaves#only ever queued up FFP using this thang. but that's also bc i feel like i don't post very much. i need smth Interesting to say when i post#on my main blog i mean. i don't make extraneous posts on here (usually) unless i'm answering an ask or something. which. still have yet to#miss one to this day. going strong#bibarel#can you tell idk what to say about this guy. what are they‚ water-type? big chance i'm fucking wrong and they're just pure normal#OKAY i was right. normal/water. semi-interesting typing and i get why they're a water-type. but. i never use. bibarel. even as a kid who#didn't understand or care about competitive. i knew bibarel was not very strong. it's a route 1 normal-type fucker. and maybe it's like#better than i think or something but tbqh it's a sinnoh 'mon and i already have another sinnoh water-type that has my heart. buizel#so bibarel was not so much in the cards for me. bro i should do like. a mono-type run of a pokémon game one day. that would be fu#do folks do that? is that a challenge run that actually exists? nuzlockes exist so i don't see why not. okay i'm doing it. my next replay o#any pokémon game is hereby decreed to be a water-type mono-type run. i may or may not liveblog it on my main blog#and it may or may not be nuzlocke. we shall see#hell maybe i'll stream it. maybe that could be fun. i don't know of *anyone* who would be interested in that but it tends to help me#actually go about completing games when i have someone there like. waiting for me to do so
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Hmmm. What if I attempted to write a piece of Trash and posted it anonymously?
#What is wrong with you Sam you should not be allowed to write#This post was inspired by...something#Namely me getting a Bad Idea for a fic (thanks to someone's else's fic)#And then feeling The Shame because I'm just like that and this would normally be enough to stop me from even attempting it#But then I was just like...what if I tried anyway and just stopped giving a shit?#I'm being super vague here because reasons#But...this bitch is tempted to just write some problematic poorly written trash and shove it out there for all to see#It's not like I have a reputation to worry about I'm a nobody LOL#But at the same time there's a bunch of reasons why I don't think I should bother#Shame is only part of it tbh there's other more valid reasons why#it doesn't help that most of the other stuff I've been working on is stuff I don't think I could ever post anon or not#I'm babbling on about nothing here what the hell?#This is what happens when I kinda-sorta inch my way out of a month-long writing slump and then I start getting Ideas again#Bad Ideas!#Folks if I'm really about to enter my IDGAF Era of writing it's gonna be a baaaaaad time for all involved...#OK that's enough Sam let's stop now#......................................the idea is for an OrangeHook fic#Or whatever people are calling that now
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Ya know. I spent most of my life with horrible painful soul-crushing social anxiety.
And after about 25 years of continuous hard work, suddenly, people started pointing out - to my utter bafflement - that I had, in fact, achieved my lifelong dream of being charismatic. I'm 29 now; I feel comfortable in most social situations, and it is a very rare person whom I cannot make laugh.
I am, undoubtedly, finally, charismatic.
But do you know what I found?
I found that now that I have an understanding of which social rules serve which functions -- Now that I have an understanding of just how much damage my awkwardness was doing to people, well,
I found that, actually, my awkwardness never really hurt anyone at all. People were just judgmental dicks to me about it.
Now that I have the skill-level to (most of the time) creatively vocalize what is in my head as soon as I think it and without fear, I can confirm once and for all what I had always suspected:
I was worth talking to when I was quiet.
I was worth talking to when I was awkward, and when the words in my head took time and patience to hear, and when most of my jokes didn't land. I was worth talking to the whole time.
So I just... I hope that if you've ever wondered whether you are worth communicating with, the answer is yes. Absolutely yes. Each of us has a soul worth sharing - and if you and I were talking, I would happily wait for you to speak (or communicate in other ways) without condescending, and I would never shame you for that harmless awkwardness that so many people feel the need to violently stomp out.
You are worth talking to. You just are. And you deserve people who will speak to you with kindness, with patience, and with the basic immutable respect owed to all people.
(I talk about this with some frequency, both on tumblr and in real life. At some point, maybe I'll gather all my thoughts on the matter into one post. At some point, I wrote about my personal experience trying to build my social skill. But I felt the need to say at least a little bit tonight after seeing this other lovely post, and I'm glad I did. It will happen again.)
#original#social anxiety#autism#that one post#actually autistic#self-diagnosis is valid - in case that last tag implies otherwise to anyone. i think it just denotes i am an autistic and not just an ally.#social skills#socially awkward#socially anxious#autistic positivity#autism positivity#like actually genuinely who does it hurt if i tell a joke that doesn't land? esp if the joke is not about another person#this is not a live comedy show this is life ya gotta learn to say 'ah well they can't all be golden!'#which btw is a line i use when my own jokes don't land and it usually plays pretty well actually. i've got a higher hit rate but#genuinely they just can't all be good! anyway i go into that in the post linked at the end there i think#people can tell when you're not sure of yourself socially and a lot of folks instinctively use that against you. and i am here to say that#it's fucked up that they are doing that and they need to step off actually. imagine getting to decide on which social cues are#acceptable and then using that power to be unkind. fuckin gross. i regret so deeply each time in my life i have made that choice.#being a kid who is abused like that so often it was eager to power trip when i met kids more awkward than myself. but it was wrong#and i regret it. and i am proud to say i haven't done that in a long time and instead when i find myself with that power i try to say#actually what do YOU want? to the people shyer than me.#i'm pretty rad now is what i'm saying lol#like all the ways that having a good social stat has improved my life just made me realize what bullshit it is that this was necessary#doing what I did is not desirable or possible for everyone. they deserve just as much out of life as i do.#side note: i think I've actually surpassed a lot of neurotypicals who had never even had to think about social rules 🤣.#like I feel no competition with other people who have struggled socially but now that I'm more charming than people who were dicks to me#I do feel like fuck you!! I win!!!! I can finally see enough of the full picture to say that your arbitrary rules were FUCKING ARBITRARY#I'm also aware of the fact that not everyone finds me charismatic but i am. in all the ways that matter to me. and I'm still growing!#note to future jack: you did save these posts in your notes app on the day this was written.#tbh i am often still awkward i am just not sorry anymore if i'm not hurting ppl. 'confident and awkward' really throws 'em for a loop! XD
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[man standing up to speak his piece meme] some of you loop so far back around on guys playing through injury that you are now advocating to take away their agency lol
#there's probably a happy medium and a lot of nuance to be had but i do realize that the internet is a No Nuance Space these days so#i guess my thing is:#yes i agree we shouldn't glorify playing through injuries#no i don't think they care what fans think one way or another lol#it's just that it's very much baked into the culture; hockey is about Sacrifice and Team and Pushing Through Pain#and i know none of you like to admit it but that IS part of what makes hockey so appealing. it's doing a lot for the Narratives!#anyway probably the real way to get a mindset shift is to frame playing through injury as selfish rather than selfless#and i WOULD like to see more of that.#i just think the way some people on hockey twt and tumblr speak on players' injuries is very odd lol#like you are not in charge of their bodies. they are. you don't get to sanctimoniously declare when someone should retire or whatever lol#you will never know their body and their situation in the way they themselves do. not to mention their top notch care teams!#just rubs me the wrong way when people act like players' bodies belong to them lol. which is genuinely the way some folks act around here
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#so that dotd rewrite is out and i have some thoughts on it but i wouldn't know where to put them.. maybe in here bc i don't actually feel -#- like making a whole ass text post. this is coming from me as criticism and not hate.. just some crit from one fan to another if you get m#SPOILERS AHEAD >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>#first off props to the team because this was obv a labor of love - 4 and a half years to make a feature long fan movie is hard work#and the animated stuff was a really nice touch and very commendable - you don't see them too often in big fanworks#in terms of the story well.. there are some things i like and some things that i don't (personally) again no hate#i'm aware this is a rewrite and boy howdy it IS a rewrite - though i am a bit sad that percy doesn't end up being the protagonist and it's#- thomas that has to play hero again.. like i kinda get it but what made the original dotd stand out was that percy was given the spotlight#so i spent an ungodly amount of time wondering when percy was gonna take charge or step into the main story to resolve the problem.. sigh#i liked that they tried to give norman more of a character bc a lot of characters do often get neglected in the series but it was kind of -#- hard to sell that for me? the twist in this rewrite was very creative and i do appreciate it but i guess it just ain't for me#“different” is ok and this is just one of many fan rewrites for this particular story#if there was something i enjoyed.. i guess the beginning was still kind of exciting because the set up was honestly like hype a bit#i liked that diesel and d10 actually got to interact face to face and there are clearer dynamics established for the diesels#and also. silverband's performances as d10 will always be fun he does a fantastic job voicing him (how d10 stole xmas will still be my fav)#my criticisms for this movie also derive from the pacing and the voice acting - i found it hard to try and understand tones sometimes -#- because the delivery felt so off.. like don't get me wrong not everyone in the fandom is a voice actor but if we're using static faces -#- for these fan works the delivery has to be a little more clear or else it'll sound like you're reading from a script.. sorry yall :"|#for the pacing i found it a bit hard to parse when some things were going on and how fast things were progressing#as well as the crashes.. that's also another thing bc i couldn't tell bc of the sfx and audio balancing - it could be better..#i wanna say. muffled voices do not substitute for a “far away”/off-screen voice bc i still can't hear it :“|#there were a lot of throwbacks and references to older thomas media/movies but some of them felt a little.. much?#if this is a dotd rewrite why are we getting some parallels with tatmr.. but i digress. at least they made diesel beef with duck a bit#there's a lot more i could say but i'm keeping those to myself. at the end of the day this fan movie was hard work for everyone involved#and you can tell some of the folks were having fun in there - props to them! i'm always glad to see more fan works in the community#we've come so far we're making feature length fan stories and rewrites that's crazy! i hope to see more in the future#fauxtrainpost.txt
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being young, black and queer (particularly butch and lesbian) online (but Tumblr specifically) is like rummaging and searching for somewhere you're fully welcome and seen but only finding places that accept parts of your identity or the places that were there that fully accepted you have been quiet and abandoned long before you even came along. You go on blogs that say they welcome queer black people or people who have weird identities but they never talk about the things that affect you or (even unkowingly) shut you down when you bring it up. You find blogs that say they accept queer black people or people who have weird identities but they're making blogs targeting and harassing transfems. You find blogs that say they accept queer black people or people with weird identities but their blog isn't safe for minors. You find blogs that say they accept queer black people or people who have weird identities and the person who runs the blog is queer and black but the last update was 2016. It's incredibly lonely.
#Just having Thoughts about this hellsite#Don't get me wrong this place has been great for finding community and indulging in my interests and exploring my identities#But it's so so incredibly lonely and shitty at the same time#I follow all the black queer blogs that are safe for minors probably on tumblr#And are normal about mspec and Butch lesbians#And I see a lot of posts talking about how shitty Tumblr was to black folks to the point they all left???#Learning that there was a time that there was a large community of black people on Tumblr????#And they're just???? Gone???? Like that????#And we're watching the same thing happen to our transfem sisters?????#It's sickening#And if I had anywhere better to go I would probably leave and find better community#But I don't.#I just gotta keep searching for what's still here of the queer black community that I can actually engage with#qpoc#black tumblr#black qpoc#black lesbian#black butch#racism#This is probably going to get as much engagement as the last post I made talking about racism#Aka 0(zero)#It's just been a long long life#And I'm barely out of my teens
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Not to generalize fans but it's been a reoccurring theme on my dash to see artists I follow either being poked fun of or "criticized" for their rw art or character interpretations and it has me like
?????
#i feel like this is a bad luck on my end as I happen to just casually follow content#and not deep dive into tags or anywhere but that's exactly why it feels bonkers to me#maybe I've been spoiled by hk fandom who is genuinely chill or know how to just not care#when their interpretations don't match#but here is something else and maybe i'm getting the whole picture wrong#it's just the view I'm getting of this fandom atm#this is like a mini rant so I apologize for that#but it's been driving me away from trying to look up or find more stuff#if eventually it's going to end up with fans saying wild stuff about a specific interpretations#and for a game that's in pixels and has grown big thanks to the fans themselves and their mod varients#some of people seem really strict about how people choose to have fun with fanwork#and dunno where to draw the line between memes and genuine appreciation#<- as in when someone makes a genuine or serious post and people flock on it with wild takes and memefy it#idk how to explain this#maybe it's me who should curate experience better but like#i'm just?? literally following artists and nothing else??#and to see them feel like crud about having fun with their interpretations because some rando decided to 'criticize' it#is honestly wild new fandom experience for me#to note: I'm not having a bad time following folks I'm just genuinely confused#and kind of sad to see this is happening at all lol
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#vibrava#i know the eyes are fucked up i have no idea why. i didn't think it would be so noticeable but apparently it is. so. here's. that#i zoomed it out just a bit so that you could see the rest of it to make it clear it's vibrava because quite honestly i wouldn't be able to#tell that this was vibrava if i didn't. y'know. make this post. i sent it to someone else and they said they wouldn't be able to tell either#i think vibrava into flygon makes sense. i dunno if trapinch into vibrava makes much sense. i used to think that vibrava was the first evo#in the line and flygon was a second evo. but i found out trapinch comes first‚ which looks like an entirely unrelated pokémon to me#i dunno if it's just me. i've talked about not understanding evolutionary lines in the tags before and folks have commented on it telling me#Why They Make Sense Actually and i was just like Damn Ok. it's like interesting to know but shit am i just looking at it wrong#i tend to look for common color schemes and design aspects i guess is my problem. but vibrava looks nothing like trapinch#i dunno what these are supposed to be exactly so maybe it makes sense somehow. like a larva bug hatching from a crab. thing. i dunno#trapinch doesn't look like a bug and vibrava does. i don't. i don't know. why does it get wings. and stay a ground-type
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