#don't do it you might think its the right thing to do but thing of everyone you'd leave
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Mac and cheese recipe from me because why not (i like to cook and i made this so im egotistic)
On a stove, add a thing of macaroni and boil it in a pot. How long? Until it's cooked idk (do this while making cheese sauce
Get another pot. Probably something big enough to hold the mac and cheese so you can place the macaroni where you're gonna make the sauce.
Grab flour, butter, milk, cheese (mix of cheddar any anything else or not. If its pregrated, you can wash it to remove the starch on it but you can skip this, i dont think ot makes a difference.)
1. Melt a half cup of butter (8tbs) on medium. Not high, medium.
2. Put the same amount of flour in and mix it all up until it mixes and becomes like mash potatoes if they looked weird
3. Turn down hest to medium low. Do not let this go to high. Medium low. Make it hot but no boiling. If you mess this up you might burn it.
4. Add a bit of milk (like a a few tablespoons )and mix until there's no liquid and the flour butter parts are more liquidy than before
5. Repeat step 4 but add only a bit of milk each time. Remember don't add a lot all at once. Little by little. DONT add more milk until the previous milk is already mixed in. (If you want an exact amount, I think 3 cups but maybe a bit more or less but do less if you aren't sure. Like 2.5 cups)
6. If its all mixed and looks very much more liquidy, you can add more milk every time until you get like a thick soup. If you aren't sure, add less milk. it should not be too thick, it should still be a free flowing liquid. Always make it thick instead of thin if you don't know. Like Adam ragusea said, you can add water, you can't take it away.
7. Add cheese. How much cheese? You decide. Don't add alot all at once. Add like half a handful and keep going until it looks good. Remember that the sauce should still be a bit liquidy. It's a cheese sauce, not a cheese dip. If you don't know, just add half a handful and a bit more. You can add some later. Sauces are always more liquidy when hot so cooling it down thickens it. (Quarter of half a cup of packed cheese but I never pack it down so don't trust me. It's your food I'm just here for a guide)
8. Mix it all until cheese melts. Once you have a sorta thick sauce.
9. Add seasoning. Salt and pepper is a must. Maybe like a tablespoon of salt and 2 tsp of pepper. Remember if you don't know, add slowly and add less. You can always season at the end. Don't rush it. I add garlic powder, onion powder, chili powder, and paprika. Chili powder and paprika and garlic powder and flavor. Don't skip those if you want enhanced max and cheese. you can always add at the end, don't tush
10. hey your pasta done? Strain it and add it to the cheese sauce. cool it down, come back in 15 minutes and taste. Grab a a bit and put it on a plate. If you don't like it, add some seasoning to the plate. If you like the seasoning, add to pot. If not, don't. Try out small portions to get taste right.
You got mac and cheese! Better than store bought, and more cost effective and delicious!
So like I had a big family party a few days ago and we made mac n cheese cause I like mac n cheese a lot, but we made too much mac n cheese and had like 2 and a half trays of it left after the party
I didn't really mind cause I like mac n cheese a lot and so for the past few days I've just been eating mac n cheese for every meal and I've been loving it
But today my mom goes "we better put it in the freezer before it spoils" and I'm kinda sad about it cause what will I eat now, y'know?
So I go to take a nap and I have this like CRAZY distressing dream where I'm in this white blank void and in front of me is a glowing and floating tray of mac n cheese and I try to reach out for it but my hand just passes through it and then slowly the mac n cheese starts fading away and like I fall down to the ground straight up CRYING because I'm so sad about the mac n cheese leaving me, and I wake up with tears in my eyes and I have that like melancholic feeling of having forever lost something or someone very close to you
The meme above is an artists rendition
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I'm probably going to piss some people off with this, but.
The use of AI and machine learning for harmful purposes is absolutely unacceptable.
But that isn't an innate part of what it does.
Apps or sites using AI to generate playlists or reading lists or a list of recipes based on a prompt you enter: absolutely fantastic, super helpful, so many new things to enjoy, takes jobs from no-one.
Apps or sites that use a biased algorithm (which is AI) which is not controllable by users or able to be turned off by them, to push some content and suppress others to maximize engagement and create compulsive behavior in users: unethical, bad, capitalism issue, human issue.
People employing genAI to create images for personal, non-profit use and amusement who would not have paid someone for the same service: neutral, (potential copyright and ethics issue if used for profit, which would be a human issue).
People incorporating genAI as part of their artistic process, where the medium of genAI is itself is a deliberate part of the artist's technique: valid, interesting.
Companies employing genAI to do the work of a graphic designer, and websites using genAI to replace the cost of stock photos: bad, shitty, no, capitalist and ethical human issue.
People attacking small artists who use it with death threats and unbelievable vitriol: bad, don't do that.
AI used for spell check and grammar assistance: really great.
AI employed by eBay sellers to cut down on the time it takes to make listings: good, very helpful, but might be a bad idea as it does make mistakes and that can cost them money, which would be a technical issue.
AI used to generate fake product photos: deceptive, lazy, bad, human ethical issue.
AI used to identify plagiarism: neutral; could be really helpful but the parameters are defined by unrealistic standards and not interrogated by those who employ it. Human ethical issue.
AI used to analyze data and draw up complex models allowing detection of things like cancer cells: good; humans doing this work take much longer, this gives results much faster and allows faster intervention, saving lives.
AI used to audit medical or criminal records and gatekeep coverage or profile people: straight-up evil. Societal issue, human ethical issue.
AI used to organize and classify your photos so you don't have to spend all that time doing it: helpful, good.
AI used to profile people or surveil people: bad and wrong. Societal issue, human issue, ethical issue.
I'm not going to cover the astonishingly bad misinformation that has been thrown out there about genAI, or break down thought distortions, or go into the dark side of copyright law, or dive into exactly how it uses the data it is fed to produce a result, or explain how it does have many valid uses in the arts if you have any imagination and curiosity, and I'm not holding anyone's hand and trying to walk them out of all the ableism and regurgitated capitalist arguments and the glorification of labor and suffering.
I just want to point out: you use machine learning (AI) all the time, you benefit from it all the time. You could probably identify many more examples that you use every day. Knee-jerk panicked hate reflects ignorance, not sound principles.
You don't have beef with AI, you have beef with human beings, how they train it, and how they use it. You have beef with capitalism and thoughtlessness. And so do I. I will ruthlessly mock or decry misuse or bad use of it. But there is literally nothing inherently bad in the technology.
I am aware of and hate its misuse just as much as you do. Possibly more, considering that I am aware of some pretty heinous ways it's being used that a lot of people are not. (APPRISS, which is with zero competition for the title the most evil use of machine learning I have ever seen, and which is probably being used on you right now.)
You need to stop and actually think about why people do bad things with it instead of falling for the red herring and going after the technology (as well as the weakest human target you can find) every time you see those two letters together.
You cannot protect yourself and other people against its misuse if you cannot separate that misuse against its neutral or helpful uses, or if you cannot even identify what AI and machine learning are.
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Discussing Caitlyn Kiramman
Caitlyn, especially in the second season, reminds me of Macbeth in all the worst and most concerning ways.
At the start of Macbeth, Macdonwald is a character who had committed treason and was killed by Macbeth, as at that point he still had his morality.
This is similar to how at the start of Arcane, Caitlyn was an enforcer who did her job, and did it well without engaging in any of the corruption that seemed pretty rampant at this point.
Later, Macbeth's wife Lady Macbeth, in a self serving manner, manipulates Macbeth into committing regicide by killing the king. He's obviously hesitant to do this as it goes against his morals, but with the encouragement, he does go through with it on his own accord. Despite having the power of being the Thane of Cawdor and Glamis, he still does this in attempt to get more power. After this, he successfully becomes king.
Now, I don't think Caitlyn is acting how she is in attempt of power, however thats definitely one of the outcomes of her actions. Ambessa, who is who I see in Lady Macbeth's role in this analogy, is also manipulating Caitlyn in order to gain personally, and to encourage war so that hextech weapons are made and she can use them to fight her own battles. Caitlyn has a moral code, yet despite this she does do bad things. She uses the grey as a tool to clear out the streets, when that is a literal war crime. She knows this is wrong, emphasised by her mothers words that go starkly against her actions playing right before the scene. She also takes the position of power Ambessa presents her with despite her in earlier episodes likely being against Ambessa's whole cause, and the war that she's about to start.
Macbeth, before this, has a friend called Banquo, who suspects that he killed Duncan for the throne and power. Macbeth then gets him assassinated.
This is, albeit less so, reminiscent of Vi, and how after being called out on her actions, Caitlyn hits her and leaves.
Considering we only have 3 episodes of season 2, I cant be sure whether this continues progressing, but if it does, there are a few things I am assuming will happen in arc 2 and 3.
I think Caitlyn is going to start hallucinating more. The hallucinations might be of Vi, as Macbeth hallucinates seeing Banquo after causing his death, but they could also be of her mother, Jinx or even Isha, as she could've easily killed either of them had Vi not stopped her.
Now if you have read Macbeth, you'll realize i haven't mentioned one of the main reasons Macbeth turns into a usurper. The witches and their prophecy. And this is honestly because I'm not sure.
I think its entirely possible that the witches could be symbolised through the hextech, as we know the hextech weapons act up sometimes, as shown in episode 3. Its possible they may lead to hallucinations, similar to that of Victor, if they're used repeatedly while acting up, which I can imagine Caitlyn doing.
Otherwise, I think the witches could be symbolised through Jinx, and possibly Sevika and Isha to maintain the symbolism of threes. This is because the 3 of them represent the power Caitlyn wishes she has- the power to avenge her mother.
Either way, I'm hoping that Caitlyn doesn't stay on this path, as Macbeth is a tragedy for a reason.
#this is what you get when you mix someone who did macbeth in englit and a cait fan#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#arcane season two#arcane#arcane s2#caitlyn kiramman#ambessa medarda#caitlyn#vi arcane#caitvi#arcane sevika#jinx arcane#isha arcane#i know this isnt my usual content guys but i needed to discuss
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MINDRAPE! CATE DUNLAP.
synopsis; she can make you do whatever she wants. fill in the blanks. (and hey, it's not kidnapping if you walked in there and chained yourself up. right?)
✗ warnings; dom!cate, dark!cate, fem!reader, noncon, kidnapping, stockholm syndrome, fauxjob, strapfucking, there is rape in the title use your head baby. if you can. wc; 2k
IT’S not kidnapping. at least, not if you think about it. after all, sweet nothings whispered in your ear or not—at the end of the day—you’re the one who shackled yourself to a bolt-locked barstool at the ninety-ninth story of vought tower. at least, that's what cate tells you—and what cate tells you, you breathe like law.
it's okay. you don’t have to think about it. that’s not what you’re good for, anyways.
an eternity passes before she arrives. it’s torture. because while cate may be a crazy, manipulative, psycho bitch who keeps you bound to her kitchen stool almost 24/7 (with rope-burns around your ankles and wrists, to prove it), between her and boredom? the latter is more likely to kill you. so, ineffably, relief washes over you at the sound of the mechanical lock unclicking. heels clinking against marble. your mind goes a little fuzzy around the edges, too. a defense mechanism, or her own design—you don't know. will never know.
cate. cate. you hate her. you've missed her. you can’t live without her. (or, alternatively; you love her you love her you love her).
she leans down to pet your hair like you're some sort of house-pet. god. aren’t you? “untie yourself." she orders, voice, airy and familiar—and your body simply does. she likes you undone. she likes that its you doing the doing and undoing. yes, this is your fault. you brought yourself here. you did this to yourself.
even when you untie your restraints, you can't bring yourself to move. the tiles are cold against your knees.
vought lets her keep you. a plaything under surveillance is better than letting her run amok (though most of the footage she keeps for herself. she likes watching it back. likes making you watch it back, as she keeps you on her lap and fucks the brains out of your skull). as long as she keeps it clean. airtight. under lock and key.
perhaps, she took the statement too literally.
cate flounces to the couch, one leg slung gracefully over the other. she smiles, fingers beckoning you over. at your hesitance, she cocks her head, eyebrow arching warningly. she twitches her fingers, once, and it’s enough to make you squirm. "don't make me make you."
cate always speaks like that—slow, lethal. like the languid swell of blood beading from a papercut. her nails graze underside your jaw, delicate, teetering on the razor’s edge between petting your scruff or slicing your throat. effectively cowed, you crawl, keening timidly at the purred "good girl." that follows. her hand curls in your hair, deceptively gentle.
“legs, open.” her voice is like spidersilk, and even in its’ gentleness your body reacts to its steely underbelly—how it drains the will out of your body, and how it stretches your legs as wide as they might go. “sit.” there’s a beat of hesitance. the floor? the sofa? her lap? misinterpretation begets punishment, and you're so, adorably afraid. so of course, you glance back up at her, wavering, waiting for further instruction. her smile widens, head tilting, like she knows. of course she knows.
god, how precious you are. her sweet thing. can’t even think for yourself, anymore. sometimes, when cate tunes in to the thoughts swirling in your head—there's nothing. no more escape plans that might as well be scrabbling at the walls, or god forbid, droll, suicidal ideations that are more bored meanderings rather than serious attempts. all she hears, nowadays, is blissful, beautiful static.
for a brief moment, she lets you stew in your rising panic; at the near insurmountable feat of choosing something for yourself, as simple as deciding where to sit, until cate savours enough of the frantic flickering of your pupils and the delicious, furtive pound of your heartbeat until she grants you a small mercy. "the table, baby." she clarifies, tone just a smidge smug, and in an instant, you sit your plush ass against the glass coffee table. cate marvels, not for the first time, just how empty she's made that pretty little head of yours.
“take it out.” she breathes, into your ear, and the order is so familiar you don't need further clarification, hands whipping upwards to unbutton the fly of cate’s jeans. cate sinks back into the couch, hum almost playful as you struggle to pull the fabric down, with her thighs pinned against the cushions. she enjoys, watching, in silent amusement—before canting her hips upwards lazily, to help you along. allows you to peel back fabric and let the bulge packing in her crotch spring free.
your eyes widen, smacked in the jaw by hot-pink silicone. it’s larger than normal. the one that hurts. your ensuing whimper makes something hot and heavy wrench in cate’s gut. it's a shame, that you don't even know what you do to her.
"c'mon," cate's head tilts as her eyes bore into yours, arms languidly draped over the couch’s armrests. the dry tip of the dildo bobs into your mouth, your lips wrapping around it. so good, so obedient for her. "make it wet for me, baby."
the order sends a hot flush to your ears. you suck, tongue wrapping against the underside as your pretty pink porno lips glisten with your own saliva, taking her deeper and deeper, cheeks rushing with blood.
“look at you. drooling over my dick.” cate purrs, and your head jerks, downwards in its haste to obey, and you gag in the process, choking on silicone. cate laughs, and you’re all embarrassed and needy because your it’s true. your ass, squashed up humiliatingly against the glass. cunt leaking, smearing with each movement of your thighs, and there’ll be an imprint when you get up. if she lets you get up.
you’re still suckling, tip bobbing in your throat as you bite back splutters like an obedient thing, when cate’s apparently had enough. she shoves you, back flat against the glass. in doing so, the dildo slips from your mouth, and you let slip a confused, befuddled whine as your body screeches at you to take it back in. to follow that single, all-consuming command. simple creature, you. you try to sit upright, before a hand shoots around your throat. thrusts you back down, roughly, head knocking against glass.
“don’t move.” cate hisses, grasp tightening. it locks your limbs, just like that. when you fall limp, she hums, pleased, lowering herself between legs.
she kisses your inner thigh. everything in you aches to squirm, but can’t, not ever—limbs heavy with the weight of cate’s whims. her head tilts, lips jutted out in that sweet, innocuous pout as she drags up your skin. doe eyes blown wide, imploring as if she hasn't broken you, so completely and so utterly.
she dives inwards, tongue lashing up against your clit, and it hurts not to move as she peers up between your thighs. apparently, you can cry and moan as much as you want, though, and god, do you. it's purposeful. she loves to hear the noises. cate can’t smirk, not with the way her mouth is preoccupied with the hot, painful pulse of your cunt. tongue darting out and flicking in delicate licks, like a kitten lapping at milk. she doesn’t need to; the smug, knowing gleam in her eyes is gloating enough.
“mommy, please.” you gasp, like a needy little brat, hips shuddering upwards as the urge for more throbs upwards from between your legs and fuzzes your brain. cate grins in delight.
"mommy, huh?" she echoes, almost wolfish. her fingers are quick to grasp your jaw. she squeezes, angling your jaw as if inspecting a prized animal. "god. i didn't even make you say that." her eyes blaze as they scour over your body. like she’s appraising you in a new light; the way you melt, so pliant in her hands, her words. the way you mould to fit her every need without her having to lift a finger—in every sense of the word.
abruptly, her hands dig into your thighs and she orders, low and soft “flip over,” and you do. ass perked high in the air, back arched and your pussy wet with want that’s not yours, but drips obscenely from your spitsoaked folds onto the glass, like something filthy, nonetheless. cate’s breath hitches from behind, hand smoothing over the curve of your ass. briefly reverent. before her hand comes down to pinch and twist flesh, of course.
“spread yourself open,” she demands, and you can feel plastic brush against your inner thigh. obeying is almost too smooth, despite the shiver that trickles down your spine, fingers stretching your cunt open.
she slaps your cunt, hard. you cry out, clit swollen and pussy pulsing with need. “wider.” she grits, as if irritated, but you can hear the delight underneath there, as your knees bend lower, thighs spreading impossibly wider, fingers trembling with the force in which you splay yourself out, pussy glistening under the light.
god, how gorgeous you are, on display for her. her adorable little showpony. cate laughs, and you hear the snap of a phone, clicking. you open your mouth, lips reddened, bitten raw—
she shoves the dildo into your waiting cunt, and you scream.
“ah. guess i haven’t loosened you enough, yet,” cate observes as she pumps at a leisurely pace, disappointment veiling the self-satisfaction in her tone. the anguished noises you make, with each violent thrust of her hips. the way you cry out, eyes flying open, walls straining against the girth of it, stretching your stomach, thighs wobbling in the effort just to keep yourself upright.
cate forces herself in, making room you didn’t even know you had. her teeth are sharp as she nips in your ear, hips plunging in agonisingly slow motions as she pushes through your cunt's delicious, masochistic resistance. everything in you aches to writhe, to thrash, to throw yourself off this fucking table and hurl yourself down the ninety-nine storey, floor-to-ceiling windows, and yet you can’t even lift a fucking finger. a bee, drowning in its own honey.
cate almost yawns. her hand pinches the flesh of your ass. “god, this is too much work..” cate sighs, hand idly twirling a strand of your hair, and she yanks it back the same time she jams herself, inside, skin flush against skin. she grins, lazy. “mm. do it for me.”
mindlessly, you let out a hopeless whine, and then you’re fucking yourself back on cate's cock. she's not even moving. stilling to idle motionless as her hand twines in your hair, strap cinched low on her waist as your hips rock, panting with effort as you slam yourself back against plastic, again, and again. lips parted, tears a comforting burn behind glazed-over eyes. it’s not only her words compelling you. to snap your hips back with increasing ferocity, pounding yourself—deeper, and deeper. how you gasp, eyes rolling back into your skull when the tip buries itself deep enough in your tight, hot pussy to make your cum splatter against glass, knees slippery with fluid, and yet—you can’t stop, still. weakly pulsing around plastic as your hips keep moving, walls keep swallowing silicone and spitting it back out again, even as your limbs buckle with exhaustion and your cunt sears—
she’s made you into nothing. nothing but goo on her coffee table, mindless and bathing in a puddle of your own fluids.
finally, when cate’s had her view of the pretty, pathetic sight you make—she touches your shoulder, and simply says, “enough.”
you pull yourself out, slumping on the glass table, a weak thing. cate regards you, for a moment, pussy still dribbling cum, forming a pool under your thighs like melted ice cream. still, you can’t move. arms like lead, tongue lolling out—a beaten puppy.
she kisses your vacant, empty head, lips moving against skin. “tie yourself back up after i go, hm?” and then, she hops off the table.
the door clicks shut, and you tie yourself back up again. the slick dries cold between your thighs.
#yameoto#(っ ‘o’)ノ⌒💥my works !#૮ smut🔞#inbox !#cate dunlap#cate dunlap x reader#cate dunlap fanfic#cate dunlap fanfiction#cate dunlap smut#gen v#gen v smut#gen v x reader#gen v fanfic#gen v headcanons
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Hello! Do you think you're going to continue writing part 5 of " invisible strings" with eris? I really loved this series! Thank you
Invisible String - Part 5
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Pairing(s): Eris x reader
Warning(s): Please be advised; this part might not be suitable for all audiences. Proceed with caution.
Summary: You'd taken the nanny position for the royal family over a year ago, not expecting what would come of it or how close you'd grow to the child you cared for. Things became tough for Eris when his wife left him and his daughter, and he found it increasingly harder to raise Riley himself. He soon realizes, you've provided a lot more than the typical job description duties for his daughter... and maybe for him, too.
SR’s Note: My apologies, this took forever for me to finish writing for you all (I've had so much on my plate lately). This part IS SHORT, HOWEVER I'm literally already working on the next part and wanted to give you guys at least what I had done so you knew I was indeed working on it! Lol. I added in the advisory so that younger / uncomfortable readers won't read the series without knowing or expecting potential risks in content to come. For those who enjoy or look forward to content as such -- I hope you are excited! Nonetheless, I hope readers will enjoy this series that came to me in a dream one night. (; Much love to all.
Tags: @mellowmusings @talesofadragon @rcarbo1 @mandziaaa @lilah-asteria @a-frog-with-a-laptop @kitsunetori @dannul @velarisdusk @lamarmotta @paintedbyshadows @i-know-i-can @adventure-awaits13 @acourtofbatboydreams (inbox me or comment if you'd like to be added!)
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The Autumn Court experienced the changing seasons like any other in Prythian. Spring was still spring, there was still snow in the winter -- but, the current state of dreary, grayness that took over the sky and stretched beyond the court's borders was quite the contrast to a usual week in July.
Perhaps, it was a reflection of the inner turmoil seeded in those residing in the Forrest House.
"Y/N," Riley whines. "When will the sun come back?"
You sigh, wondering the same.
"I don't know Riles. I truly don't."
She huffs, her fingers reaching for her the mason jar sitting in the middle of the table. The wilting flower inside has lost the vibrant orange coloring on its petals from last week, now replaced with wilting brown ones.
"My flower is yucky with no sun on it." She frowns. You pat her head as she inspects the plant, your shoulders stiffening when you hear the front door open and close quietly.
"Daddyyyyy," Riley groans. "When is the sun coming out?" She trills, hopping off the dining room chair and making way for the front door. It seems she heard him come in too, as she makes her way toward the foyer.
The two of you had gone the entire week with as little communication as possible -- a whole lot of "yep"s and "mhm"s and nods and short debriefings. Since the whole closet incident from the week prior, you hadn't gotten the courage to talk with him again anyways; he'd been so cross with you, so irritated. Your cheeks heated at the thought, how embarassed you'd felt that night. The shame.
Honestly, the whole thing made you a bit angry.
You take a deep breath as footsteps approach, their hushed, mindless conversation drowned out by your own thoughts clouding your headspace. It's not until Eris is standing right in front of you that you come back to reality.
"Play tea party?"
You glance down, taking in the little one's innocent expression from down below. You give her a soft smile, looking to Eris quickly before returning her gaze.
"I'd be honored, dear -- would you go set it up? I'll come join you in a few minutes. Let me talk to your dad first." Riley nods, skipping down the hallway toward her bedroom. Eris looses a sigh, passing toward the kitchen island and leaning against it before looking to you again.
"So..." He says, folding his arms across his chest. You suck in a breath, prepared to hand it to him -- ask him what the Hell all that disrespect was for, what the deal is with the gowns, what was going on between the two of you, all of it.
But, your eyes catch on the wilting stem in the glass jar still sat on the table. You stall a moment, every angry thought in your head receeding like the tides when you consider what could be a more imortant topic of conversation in this very moment.
"So..." You begin, taking a step toward him. He watches you, his face expressionless, as you continue. "I... I've been thinking. Riley is, almost five, and... well, it is the last week of July..."
He simply nods, as though saying go on without saying it. You can't help but roll your eyes, stepping to stand right across from him in the space between the island and the kitchen counter.
"I think she should be enrolled in school."
His brow twitches at this, the most you've gotten from him all week. It's silent for longer than necessary, almost uncomfortable, so you start again.
"She's asking me things, Eris, that she needs a proper teacher for-"
"No."
You startle, blinking as his face returns to that look of emotionless stone.
"W-what?"
"I said no." He shrugs, staring you straight in the eye like it isn't negotiable.
"...Okay, well, I want you to hear me out." You say, trying to remain calm. "She wants to learn. She's inquisitive, and smart, and she-"
"I know she's smart." He cuts in. You huff, your brow furrowing.
"Eris, you're not even listening to me." You can't help the way your voice pitches, but his brows flatten into a straight line.
"I don't need to hear it, Y/N -- she has you. We can hire a teacher to come here if you want. But no, she isn't going to a public school where Gods know what could happen to her." He says, his low tone rising with each sentence.
You push off the counter, folding your arms across your chest. "She needs the social interaction with other kids her age, Eris. You can't keep her locked up in here-"
"I'm her father," he says angrily, leaning toward you. "I think I know, what she needs."
Once the words leave his mouth, his face softens as though he realizes what he's said and how he has acted. You stand still, your eyes wide as you stare up at him. Never has he acted so defensive, not even with the damned dresses -- but this, this was on a whole different level.
You watch as his expression changes from rage to pure worry, his concerned eyes searching yours in desperation. You can't help but look away, only glancing back when his fingers hesitantly reach for your arm.
"Y/N, I didn't mean-"
"Don't." You yank your shoulder back, sneering up at him. He drops his hand slowly, shaking his head as he fumbles for his words.
"I'm sorry Y/N. I shouldn't have spoken to you like that, I-"
"You're damned right, you shouldn't have." You said, glaring up at him through your brows. The lump in your throat only grew as you began to feel bad, practically kicking him while he was indeed apologizing.
Maybe he deserved it... a little.
You turned on your heel, making way for Riley's room. He could make dinner tonight. After all -- maybe some pretend tea would do you good.
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"I need to leave at first light for another trip with the guard."
It'd been a few days since you'd had it out with Eris, and maybe it was good you did; he'd been much more present, insisting on cooking, proving more when he was home, and being more involved with not just his daughter but you as well when he was home in the evenings... well, as much as you'd let him be. You hadn't entirely forgiven him yet, all things considered, and the incident from a few weeks ago hadn't even been mentioned, so the relationship was, awkward. To say the least.
"How long this time." You said it as plainly as you could, trying to ignore the burn of the firepoker upon your heart at the thought of him leaving again. You wished it didn't hurt so bad, wished it didn't effect you so much each time.
"Only three days. A quick trip to Spring and back." He nods assuringly, setting his pack on the dining table and looking to you. Nodding, you awkwardly run your hand along your arm, feeling a bit exposed under his intense gaze. This late in the evening, you knew he didn't tell Riley he'd be leaving (per usual) -- so she'd wake up tomorrow with that lovely realization.
"Ok." You chew on your bottom lip, and Eris sighs, stepping toward you. He reaches for your hand, but sensing your hesitation, he retracts. A look of sadness crosses his face before his eyes meet yours.
"Those dresses... in the closet." He murmurs. "They were Selene's." His jaw tightens at the name, and you swear you stop breathing. This was not the conversation you planned to have tonight.
"She... her family, they pass them down for tradition." He continues. "On her way out, she didn't really care to take them; I mean, she took just about everything else, but." He huffs a humorless laugh, but continues when you don't say anything.
"Anyway... I kept them because." He sighs, his head dropping before looking to you again. "You're right, Y/N. Riley is a very smart girl. One day, she is going to ask about her birth mother, and, well."
He shrugs. "I'm not going to have anything to show or give her that was hers." His gaze drops.
"The only thing I had left was those silly dresses from her side of the family."
Your heart clenches as though you can feel every ounce of sorrow he is feeling in that moment. You reach out, your hand caressing his cheek softly before you can think.
"Eris, I... I had no idea, really, I'm sorry-"
"Please, Gods don't apologize." His hand covers yours, his fingers wrapping around yours as he holds it against his cheek. "I know how it looks, and how it must have looked when you happened upon it." He sighs, his other hand reaching for your waist.
"It didn't help that I handled the situation poorly, either." He admits, sorrowfully looking into your eyes. You gaze up at him, your mouth twisting to the side. "I can't take it back, but I truly hope you can understand how sorry I am Y/N."
You step closer, closing the gap between the two of you as he pulls you into a firm embrace. His hand runs through the strands of your hair, a gentle reminder that everything might, just might, be okay.
・゚:* ✧・゚:
"Y/N! Another!"
Riley holds out an identical bloom to the one previously in the mason jar to you th efollowing day, her earlier sadness at her father's departure replaced with temporary glee.
"Oh wow! Look -- this one is very vibrant." You wink at her, continuing on the path back to the Forest House.
"Vi...bran...t." She sounds out, examining the stem in her hand. She dumped out the dead flower pre-garden walk, and surely will now want to replace it.
As the two of you approach the front door, you stoop down to grab the few pieces of mail collated there. One envelope of deep mohogany with gold embossing catches your eye -- but, you follow the little girl inside nonetheless and push the door closed.
"We put this in the cup?" She asks, already making way for the sink to gather more water for her jar. You set down the paper pile, giving her all your undivided attention.
"Of course dear," you say, helping her to sit on the counter and fill her jar from the sink. She places the new flower in the glass, beaming at its brilliancy.
"Yay!" She squeals, her little feet kicking with delight. You help her off the edge, carefully transporting the jar to the table where it sat prior.
"We make sure this one has sun," she insists. "So it won't be ugly."
You chuckle, returning to the mail pile and plucking the envelope from the top. Your intrigue only grows when you see it is adressed to Eris, Riley and you.
You don't waste another moment in tearing it open.
Scanning the page, you feel a new kind of excitement -- a flutter of hope in your heart, a surge of excitement through your veins. Every nerve ending is electric within you as your true joy grows, the passionate feeling inside deeper than what you thought you could explain before. You felt, like truly, what you said meant something. Someone cared what you said, and you'd been heard.
"Riley?" You called. Her little footsteps bounded into the room, a look of interest on her face as she took you in and the paper between your fingers.
"Uh huh?"
You grinned, telling her the wonderful knews.
"Your daddy signed you up for school next month, sweetie."
・゚:* ✧・゚:
#a court of thorns and roses#acotar#a court of silver flames#acosf#a court of frost and starlight#acofas#acotar smut#eris vanserra#eris acotar#eris x reader#eris x oc#eris fanfic#eris vandaddy#acowar#a court of mist and fury#a court of wings and ruin#read more#long reads
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Transformers: One Tickle Headcanons!
A/N: look away LOOK AWAY im still obsessed with these silly little robots and i cannot get them out of my head so i wrote this while avoiding my other responsibilities LOL i hope the few transformers fans on my blog enjoy and if you're not a transformers fan read anyway and join the fandom i promise its so fun!!! (ps i might do headcanons for the other continuities as i watch more... tfp fans unite)
Orion Pax
this stupid little guy i love him to bits
he is really ticklish and he is so silly about it
hes such a switch like. he doesnt mind being tickled at all i bet he probs loves the attention LOL but he LOVES tickling other bots like d-16 hehe
he's veeery tickly under his arms ESPECIALLY if you get the seams that connect his arm to his torso that will make him scream. get him there
hes ticklish in most of the normal cybertronian tickle spots as well (dont ask me what those are. they are up to interpretation!) but i think hes also got a pretty sensitive chassis (tummy...) and if you get the little seams that go across his chassis he will be GONEE
hes got a really loud laugh i think... one of those rapid fire squealy laughs yup yup
he squeaks! and gasps! and makes other funny noises! but only if you catch him off guard otherwise he's just laughing lol
he will put up a fight if someone tickles him!!! he will go down kicking and actually has a good shot at turning the tables LOL
d-16 has had those tables turned on him so fast but he never learns! poor dee
like i said before hes pretty chill about getting tickled but he thinks hes literally The tickler of all time
hes very confident about his ler skills bc d-16 is so ticklish its actually not fair but if you put him up against elita he would fold so fast
wiggles his digits at d-16 every fucking chance he gets somebody stop his ass before he kills dee
i think he and d-16 tickle each other a lot without it escalating to a tickle fight or full-on murder (orion is the murderer.)
like they poke each other! all the time!
they're good about not doing it on shift (most of the time... side eyes orion again) but as soon as they clock out its a free for all
orion is pretty teasy but not overly so if that makes sense? hes more taunty than teasy HAHA like he'll say to d-16 "lol why do i keep forgetting how ticklish you are" and dee is screaming
he does not tickle elita. ever. she scares him.
also he tried to tickle her once and she wrecked his ass so bad he could hardly stand up. d-16 never let him hear the end of it either
d-16 will still randomly bring it up like "hey pax remember when you tried to tickle elita haha that was so- AUGH!!" and then orion jumps him
D-16
DEE MY BELOVED GAAAAH
he is ridiculously ticklish because i said so. I don't make the rules. also im right d-16 is the biggest lee on this list
hes also a switch but hes so ticklish its hard to get away with tickling other bots like orion because one poke and the tables are turned!! orion is nice to him sometimes tho and lets him get in a few tickles mwahaha
im pushing my d-16 hip agenda. are yall seeing a pattern with me giving my favs ticklish hips ITS BECAUSE HIS HIPS ARE RIGHT THERE!!! anyways. d-16 has the most grabbable and tickleable hips and his hips should be grabbed and tickled until he screams
hes also tickly on his thighs! and his chassis (more tummy!!)
d-16 is one of those people who will try to keep his laugh in but he literally lasts two seconds before hes giggling. two seconds is actually a generous estimate tbh!
his LAUGH i feel it in my bones hes got massive giggles and its kind of high pitched and hes so embarrassed but its adorable and im so upset about it
like once hes laughing its a much deeper laugh but initially since hes trying to keep himself from laughing he just giggles frantically and its so cute bc its so pitchy
HE SNORTS
he snorts and he hates it but it is literally The best thing in the world and orion loves to tickle him until he snorts
for a week after orion learned what the word "speedrun" meant he tried different speedrun challenges with d-16 (how fast can i make him mention megatronus prime, etc.) and one of the days was "how fast can i make d-16 snort"
the answer is 1 minute and 34 seconds in earth time i aint doing the cybertronian equivalent. google is right there.
when he tickles other bots its crazy tho he can be MEANNN if he gets the chance
like he will taunt worse than orion and hes also a really good tickler methinks.. knows how and when to be more rough and when to be more gentle so he can really drive someone up the wall
once he got orion pinned face down and just. shoved his servos under orion's arms. had him screaming and begging but tbh orion probs deserved it!
d-16 has never tried to tickle elita and does not plan to. he will make fun of orion's attempt but he knows better
i think d-16 was also the first one of the gang to give bee a little tickle!!! got him giggling and actually got him to stop yapping a lil bit hehe but it was fun for everyone
B-127
I will tolerate absolutely ZERO bee slander alright if you beef with him you beef with me get off my blog
bee is almost as ticklish as d-16 but had absolutely no idea until he met orion, d-16, and elita. zero clue.
he knew what tickling was! he had tried to tickle himself before after seeing some bots in a tickle fight but hes never been tickled until d-16 poked at him a bit and he jumped 10 feet in the air
d-16 is really nice about tickling bee.... gives him soft tickles bc he knows hes not used to it and tickles him just enough to get him giggling IM SO UPSET
orion is also pretty nice about it but hes too teasy and bee gets embarrassed (also hes learning abt teases from orion. more on that later!)
i think he's really tickly on his chassis!!! most tickly spot for him definitely... all over too not just tummy part but his sides and hes also got tickly knees! watch out tho bc this dude kicks LOL
he has one of those cackly laughs but also has really sweet giggles and he DEF squeaks i dont make the rules
hes pretty shy about tickling others at first but because hes just not used to being around other bots!! hes been told before that hes too much so hes worried that tickling other bots is going to cause other bots to shut him down... BUT HE LEARNS ITS OK TO BE SILLY!!!
he sees orion tickling d-16 and starts yapping about how hes never been tickled and d-16 and orion tickle him a bit and its really sweet but he does NOT know how to react
"WHY AM I LAUGHING WHAT" "we're tickling you bee thats what happens" "OH THATS AWESOME HAHA IT FEELS FUNNY"
bee definitely likes being tickled but he also loves tickling the other bots... id say more lee in general but will tickle when he feels like its okay to!
hes normally yapping about something completely unrelated when hes tickling someone which is really funny but he learned from orion (BAD INFLUENCE!!!) how to tease people
so! now when he tickles other bots he does the really evil teasy stuff... it hasnt come back to bite orion yet but d-16 is suffering!
Elita-1
ahem... women... women women I LOVE ELITA
okay i think shes pretty tickly but not nearly as much as the rest of them... she can take a few pokes and barely smile but also can you even get a few pokes in before shes wrecking ur ass? not really!
shes 90% ler and 10% lee and yes i would definitely piss her off so she would tickle me who said that not me. i love women.
shes tickly on her knees and under her arms!! good luck getting her tho she is very squirmy if you manage to get her and even then she will fight BACK
she has a really bright and bubbly laugh if she gets got really good and it is so lovely and GAAAAH
she doesnt actually tickle other bots that often its mostly if people piss her off or try to tickle her that she goes after them mwahaha
which is why orion is such a frequent victim of her attacks
she is also one of those people who is either silent when shes tickling someone or is the MEANEST teaser on planet earth and bots like orion have experienced both and he cannot decide which option is worse
she has tickled d-16 and bee before but not nearly as bad as orion... he pisses her off so bad LOL i love their dynamic
shes actually so sweet with bee compared to d-16 and orion like okay elita we get it you have a favorite (hes my fav too i totally understand)
i want to talk more about her as a lee tho bc i feel like... she actually wouldnt mind being tickled that much its mostly reflex and its also cuz she feels like shes gotta be tough and being soft kinda goes against that orz
she keeps this mostly to herself but she does occasionally let bee tickle her more than she would let another bot because she knows hes just a Guy and is too busy yapping about other stuff while he tickles her to be like "wait why are you letting me tickle you rn"
her soft spot for bee... makes me so ill...
she also shows clear favoritism for bee when shes tickling him the teases are so much sillier and shes not as evil in general. for orion pax it is on sight
#transformers#transformers one#headcanons#tickle headcanons#orion pax#d 16#b 127#bumblebee#elita 1#did not read this over#pure unfiltered rico cringe
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MDNI 🔞
Main Masterlist here
WHISPERED VOWS MASTERLIST here
Summary: You thought planning your wedding was going to be a magical memory. You didn't realize that it might make you second guess everything.
Pairing: Fiancée Yoongi x Insecure F. Reader
Genre: Romance, Angst, Smut, Hurt-Comfort
Warnings: Explicit Sex, Toxic Family Dynamics, Arguments, Sex Toys, Self Doubt, Over Thinking, Yoongi Overworking Himself, Reader Needs To Speak Up
SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUt
You stare at the screen of your computer and yawn. You haven't gotten a lot of sleep the past few nights. Yoongi has been gone again at night more frequently, opting to sleep in his studio in small spurts in between working. He tells you that he's so close to finishing the album, but you'll believe it when you see it. As of right now, you don't believe him at all. This has now been the third time he told you that. You have been keeping yourself busy trying to make the decision of what cake you want to try at your tasting next week. You get ten flavors to sample, and you are taking it very seriously. Your guest won't remember your vows after the wedding but they will remember if the cake was bad. Compared to everything else, this is the one thing you were looking forward to.
“What are feelings on fondant?” You ask Seungkwan. He looks up at you from across the room and makes a face. “Buttercream it is.”
“What does Yoongi want?” he asks.
“He doesn't care for cake, so he'll leave it up to me,” you tell him with a sigh. “Just like everything else. At least he is coming with me to sample them. So, I'll take it as a win.”
“You should talk to him about it,” he says, typing away on his computer. “If it's getting to be too much, you need to say something.”
“No, I took responsibility to plan everything. I can't go back on my word,” you tell him as you lean back and close your eyes. “I got your sister's email. The picture of the bouquet she sent is beautiful.”
“Oh, I'm glad,” he said with a small smile. “What did you go with?”
“Dark burgundy delilahs and white roses. Seriously, Seungkwan, thank you. I really appreciate it,” you say. “Anyway, I'm hungry. I'm going to hit the vending machine downstairs on the studio level. Did you want anything?”
“We have vending machines on our floor too,” Seungkwan tells you with a knowing look.
“I'm not up to anything. They have Oreos down there,” you say, defending yourself. “All we have are protein bars.”
“I guess I'll take a pack as well,” he relents.
Grabbing your card from your bag, you leave your office and take the elevator downstairs. You weren't lying….technically. The studio level does indeed have better snacks in the vending machine, but you can't help it if you have to walk by Yoongi's studio to get to it. Your chances of actually running into him were slim, but hey, you'll take the chance.
Leaving the elevator, you round the corner past Hobi's studio and then down past Yoongi's studio to get to the coveted snack machine. Sliding your card, you press the correct number for your cookies, the machine roars to life and pushes your cookies out. Bending down, you take them from the bottom of the machine and repeat. Only this time, the Oreos do not drop once you press the correct buttons. They get stuck between the coil holding them and the small black divider to its side.
“No,” you say into the empty hallway. You give the button another press and another, but still nothing happens. You gave the machine a big whack this time, but the only thing that you managed to do was hurt your hand. “Ouch!” You exclaim and shake your hand.
“Need help,” a voice says, startling you. You didn't even hear a door open.
Shit. Kai is smiling at you when you look to see who came to your rescue. He looks just as handsome as you remember, but this is not the best place to be seen with him. Not when you can look past him and see your fiancée's door. Fucking Orero's. They were too good to resist. You need to lay off the junk food. You should have gone with the protein bars.
“Um, sure. Thanks,” you say and back away from the vending machine.
Kai presses both his hands at the top of the vending machine and gently rocks it back and forth. It probably takes less than ten seconds before the sweet snack hits the bottom of the machine. He reaches down and retrieves them for you. Standing back up, he smiles and hands them to you.
“Thanks,” you say again, taking them from him and then proceed to take a few extra steps away from him.
“Y/N, right?” He asks you and leans on the machine he just manhandled. “Lisa's friend. We met at Jimin's party.”
“Yeah, that's me,” you say, standing there awkwardly in front of him. “I should…”
“You know it's a shame that our night was cut short at that party. I had a good time talking to you,” he comments, and you can hear the elevator ding. “Do you have any plans for Valentine's Day tonight?”
“No,” you say quietly. Is that today? You have completely forgotten.
“Is your boyfriend working tonight? He works here, right? Your boyfriend is a producer in the company? I think I have seen around….he glares a lot.”
“Fiancée and part owner actually,” Jimin says, walking up to the two of you. He slings his arm around his friend's shoulder. “I think Y/N needs to head back to work.” Jimin widens his eyes and jerks his head quickly. You stare at him strangely but decide to just go with it.
“Yeah, umm, very busy,” you say as Jimin still motions for you to go.
“Oh,” Kai said, looking amused. “So busy you had to have a cookie break? You don't seem that busy to me.”
“Yup, she just needs sugar every now and then, or she gets angry. I think she …realllyyy….needs to go. She should also…take the stairs. Now.” Jimin says.
Your eyes widen. You finally get it. Yoongi was probably on his way down. You turn quickly, running down the hall and heading for the door hiding the stairwell. You hear Kai say something to Jimin, but you were too busy running for your life to catch what it was. You make a sound of defeat when you open the door. Do you want to take four flights of stairs in heels? No. Do you want Yoongi to catch you with Kai? Absolutely not. You'll take the chance of busting your ass in your heels because it was better than the alternative.
Huffing and puffing, you make it back into your office and throw the cookies at Seungkwan, hitting him squarely in the chest. Who then made a disapproving sound when they hit him. You throw yourself in your chair and wipe your forehead with your hand. Man, you're out of shape.
“What happened?” he asks, opening the snack you got him and shoves one in his mouth.
“Kai happened,” you say and don't elaborate. You just hope that Yoongi doesn't find out.
Did anything interesting happen today?
It should have been an innocent text from Yoongi, but you knew better. He knew that you must have talked to Kai earlier, but you don't know who told him. Would Jimin go through all that trouble to help you and then rat you out? Probably. Not that there was anything to tell because you did nothing wrong. You bite your lip and think about how you want to answer this. You weigh your options. You can be brat about this, or you can fess up and be honest. Your fingers tap the side of your phone in thought. This is the fifth night in a row that he wouldn't be home, and your eyes drift to that red trunk that has yet to be discovered in your closet. You chose brat.
I got me and Seungkwan Oreos. You responded by typing back.
That all?
Yup, I wanted to save my energy for tonight. You write back.
Getting out of bed, you go to your closet and drop to your knees in front of that red chest. You take off the blanket and hoodies that you threw on top of it, placing everything to the side. You're going to take Lisa's advice and send Yoongi a quick picture. Of what exactly….you're not quite sure yet. Opening the lid, your face still burns with embarrassment, looking at everything that Lisa bought for you. You don’t even know where to start.
What's tonight? he types back.
You reach inside and grab what you think she called a personal massager. A deep purple device was one of the more innocent looking items in the box. Your eyes next land on the leather handcuffs, and you quickly snatch them as well before you could talk yourself out of it. Taking a breath, you put everything back before walking back over to the bed. Chucking your shirt off over your head, leaving your top half completely exposed. You lie down on your stomach, moving the toy close to your body and squish your boobs together between your arms. Positioning your device in what you hope is just the right angle to make you look enticing you snap a picture using the timer. You look at the result, and you are actually kind of impressed. Not bad.
Solo play, you answer with the accompanied picture and hit send.
Your palms become sweaty, your hands shake, and your eyes become large as you stare at your phone screen. What did you do? Oh, no! What did you do? Can you unsend a text? Please, you just want to take it back. Your hands start to flail around in the air by your head in panic. Your heart stops as the message goes from delivered to read.
“Oh shit,” you whisper to yourself and grab your shirt to cover yourself.
You watch as the dreaded dots appear on the screen, showing that he was responding. Your mouth goes dry, and suddenly, they disappear, but nothing comes through. You wait and wait, but again, nothing comes through. He's not going to respond. You don't know if you should be relieved or embarrassed that he probably didn't like it. Maybe Lisa doesn't know what she is talking about after all. You thought maybe you could salvage Valentines, but now you feel just plain stupid and a little unwanted. It kind of hurt. Tossing your phone on the bed, you lazily roll yourself off the bed and head for the bathroom to shower. Maybe you can wash away your idioticness.
When you open the bathroom door after your shower, the steam rolls out behind you. You tighten the towel that is wrapped around your freshly cleaned body as you head back to the bedroom. Stepping over the threshold into said room, you freeze. Yoongi is sitting on the edge of the bed. In his hands was that deep purple toy. His eyes look up at you through the strands of hair that have fallen over his forehead and into his eyes. Your pulse quickens. You guess Lisa does, in fact, know what she is talking about. You watch him reach over and grab the discarded cuffs. He dangles them off one of his slim fingers and raises an eyebrow at you.
“Solo play, huh?” he asks, resting both his elbows on his knees.
“I didn't think that you would come,” you tell him, holding your towel tighter like it was going to hide you somehow. Hide away the embarrassment of your actions.
Yoongi stands up from the bed after he discards the gifts on the bed and approaches you slowly. Once he reaches you, he slides his hand down your bare arm. The excess water in your hair starts to drip down your exposed skin, sending a chill through you. You noticeably shiver, and Yoongi pulls you closer to him. Bending his head, he captures your lips with his own, giving you a soft, teasing kiss.
“Do you still want it to be solo, or can I join?” he whispers against your lips.
You slip your hands to the hem of his shirt and pull up. Yoongi lifts his arms, helping you bring it over his head and taking it off the rest of the way by himself. Pulling his head down to you, you press your mouth against his. Yoongi moves his hands to your wet tangled hair, gripping your head tightly, keeping you where you were.
“Were you thinking of me?” he asks, pulling away slightly and pressing his forehead against yours.
“Yoongi,” you whimper and try to look away, but the hold on your head doesn't let you.
“What? You can't send me pictures like that and be embarrassed, baby,” he tells you as he kisses a path from your cheek to your neck. “You don't think that I haven't touched myself thinking about you? Hmmm, because I have…and I do.”
Something in you snaps, and you grab him, kissing him hard as you think about him alone in his studio, stroking himself. He groans into your mouth, holding you close against his body. You place your hands on his chest and back him up to the bed. The both of you falling onto it once the back of his knees hit the edge of the mattress, mouths still connected. Pulling away, you crawl off of him and move to the center of the bed. Yoongi twists around trying to grab for you, but you stay out of his reach, and you make him follow you up the bed.
You gently push him back against the pillows when he reaches out for you again, and you climb onto his lap. Leaning down, you press your mouth to his again. His hands travel to the top of your twisted towel, and he gently pulls it apart, giving him the treat of your naked body with small water droplets now dripping down onto the both of you. He relaxes underneath you and takes in every inch of you as his hands run up over the top of your thighs and land on your hips.
You reach over and grab the black leather cuffs that are laid beside you. You toy with them and undo the velcro with a loud shkriiiiip. He smirks at you and wets his lips with his tongue. One hand goes to your face. lovingly strokes your cheek with his thumb.
“You want me to cuff you to the bed, baby?” he questions, his voice deep with desire. You smile shyly back at him and shake your head. His eyes narrow at you for a moment before laughing silently. Yoongi places his hands above his head, resting them on the pillow and raises an eyebrow at you. He's daring you to do it. “It's okay.”
You lean over him and wrap his wrist in the leather before hooking the other side through the dark wooden slats of the headboard. Repeating the same treatment to the other wrist, he willing lies there at your mercy. You want to keep here so he can't leave you for days, almost weeks at a time like he always does. God, you miss him, and you don't know how much longer you can last like this. The loneliness at night has almost become unbearable. The silence was almost too loud.
Taking his mouth with yours again, your tongues dance together naturally as your mouths open for one another. He groans in your mouth as you ground your hips onto his pelvis. Your lips pull away with a smack, and you slither your way down his body as you maintain eye contact with him. You can see that his breathing has picked up by the way his chest moves up and down. If that wasn't a sure sign of him liking this, the straining in his sweatpants definitely did.
Settling yourself on the bed between his legs, you run your hand over his clothed erection. Yoongi bucks his hips up into your touch and lets out a harsh, shuddering breath. Reaching for the top of his sweats, you curl your fingers around the fabric and pull them over his hips. You stop in surprise when you realize that he didn't have anyone underneath. Your eyes meet his, and he smirks and gives a slight shrug as best as he can, given his current position.
Pulling them the rest of the way off, you grab his hardness and bring your mouth down to him. Giving his tip one small lick, you pull away. You sit back on your heels and stare at him with an innocent smile before crawling back up his body. You rest your weight on your hands as you hover your face over his.
“Happy Valentine's Day,” you say quietly, and his eyes widen in recognition.
“I'm sorry,” he says quickly, but you shut him up with a kiss.
“I forgot too, until….Kai reminded me,” you tell him with a knowing look, and he narrows his eyes.
“I bet he fucking did,” he growls.”He was so fucking smug talking to Jimin about you.”
“Oh,” you say and drop your hips onto his hardness that was lying against his flat stomach. You languidly move your wet core back and forth along it. Letting the motion stimulate your clit.
“Yeah,” he answered breathlessly as his eyes rolled back slightly. “Fuck, keep going.”
“Nothing happened,” you tell him as you lift your hips off of him, denying him your touch. “I barely even said two words to him.”
“I trust you,” he says, taking a deep breath
“Do you?” You ask him seriously.
“With my whole heart,” he says, lifting his head for a kiss. You lean down and press your mouth to his once again before moving your kiss to his neck. Yoongi's head falls back onto the pillow. “Baby, can we talk about this later. My cock is so hard it hurts.”
Sitting up you reach between your legs, you grab his cock and run the head along your folds, coating him with your natural slickness before slowly sinking onto him. Yoongi pushes his tongue against the side of cheek as he watches you take all of him with rapt attention. You lean forward with your hands on his chest and press your forehead against his as you start to slowly move up and down on him. You close your eyes and savor the feeling of him inside of you as you take your time. The feeling of fullness replacing the ache of emptiness and loneliness that has plagued you for months now. The hot flame within you that has dulled finally roared back to life.
Yoongi plants his feet flat on the bed and thrusts his hips up against you. His hard dick spears you over and over again as you fall forward from the force of his hips hitting you and bury your face into his neck. You let out a strangled moan as he takes control.
“Undo me, Y/N,” his raspy voice commands. “I need to get my mouth on you.”
You reach up blindly and pull the velcro off one of the cuffs. With his wrist successfully freed, he hurriedly grabs the opposite side and undos it himself. Sitting up, he throws them to the floor and gently guides you off him. He grabs your waist and turns you so you can lie down in his previously occupied spot before he grabs your knees, spreading you open for him.
Lying on his stomach, Yoongi presses a kiss to your throbbing clit. His fingers run up and down your opening gathering your wetness before sinking them into you. You sigh and wiggle your hips in response. Sticking his tongue out he traces small circles around you as his fingers start a slow rhythm pumping into you.
“Do you want me to use that?” he asks, jerking his head to the deep purple toy.
“NO!” You exclaim and cover your face.
Yoongi moves up up your body, hovering over you as his fingers continue to slide in and out of you. He crooks them at the perfect angle that has you gasping and grabbing at his shoulders. Yoongi leans down and kisses your cheek before pushing his fingers deeper inside of you. You press your head further into the pillow underneath you with a whimper.
“Let me use it. Please?” he asked, tongue licking a wet stripe underneath your jaw. You bite your lip as he shoves his fingers into you at a rapid pace that is just as deep.
“Fuck,” you gasp out. “Okay, okay. Use it.”
Yoongi pulls his fingers out of you quickly and grabs onto the massager. His hand fumbles with it for a second before he finds the button to turn it on. The low hum of the messenger and the dark look in his eyes make your mouth go dry. Placing his lips on yours, he trails the deep purple toy down between your breast over your stomach before reaching his final destination. A whine escapes your lips as the vibration hits your sensitive spot.
“Shhh,” he says softly. “I got you. Stop me if it's too much.”
Yoongi moves down the bed, resting on his knees before sinking his fingers back into you. Holding the toy against you, his fingers start pumping into you at a furious pace. Tapping that innermost spongy spot repeatedly has your wetness dripping out of you with every push and pull of his fingers. Your hands reach up and grab on to the wooden slats of the headboard and squeeze tightly. Your hips start to gyrate, and your breathing picks up, making your chest heave up and down.
“God, I miss seeing you like this,” Yoongi growls at you.
“I….I….,” you struggle with words as your hips jump. Your inner walls rhythmically pulse around his fingers, slicking them even more. “STOP!” You manage to sob out. He throws the toy down on the bed in an instant and looks at you with wide eyes. “You…I….I want you.”
“I'm here,” he said, wrapping your legs around his waist. “I am right here. Are you sure you want more?”
“Please, I need it,” you whimper.
Yoongi lines himself up to your entrance and plunges himself all the way. Your back arches as you bring your arm around his shoulders and pull him down to you. Your chests press together, his face buried in your neck, legs wrapped around his waist as his hips thump repeatedly against your own wildly. You feel delirious as his lips attach to your neck sucking hard enough to mark you. You sink your hand into his hair, tugging him off your neck.
“Got to show him your mine, baby. He acts like he can have you. Can he have you? ” he growls in your ear, and you shake your head, unable to speak. His hips pick up in tempo as the headboard starts to rhythmically bang against the wall loudly. “I'm not going to last much longer,” he pants. “You are going to come again. Do you hear me?”
“Yes,” you pant.
Reaching out, he grabs the discarded toy. Turning it back on, he sneaks it between your bodies to touch it to your clit. You both moan loudly as it makes contact as the vibrations rush through both of you. You feel yourself clench around his hardened length as you cry out, your wetness coating his length. Yoongi hums deeply in satisfaction at the feeling of your pulsating core that surrounds him. His own hips stutter and lose rhythm, toy falling out of his hand as you slap it away when it becomes too much. Slamming his mouth against yours, his hips give you one more hard thrust before he stiffens and comes deep inside of you.
Yoongi drops his head onto your shoulder, panting. You slowly graze your nails up and down his back as you stare up at the ceiling. You can feel his lips lightly connect with the front of your shoulder in what you think is a loving gesture. A tear falls out of the corner of your eye, and you quickly wipe it away. The roaring fire within you minutes ago has gone back to that dull flame. It's a flame that barely flickers and fights to stay lit. You're scared.
Fuck.
Tagged Readers
@mggv97, @granataepfelchen, @kam9404, @svnbangtansworld, @futuristicenemychaos, @notarshia
#yoongi x reader#yoongi x you#yoongi smut#yoongi fanfic#min yoongi smut#bts suga#yoongi au#bts smut#bts fic#min yoongi#yoongi fluff#bts yoongi#bts min yoongi#min yoogni#min suga#suga bts#suga#suga bangtan#yoongi
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Writing Tools for Planning Your Story
I've tried tons of writing apps and sites, so you don't have to. Here's a list of free sites to plot out your novel, with my review and some images of how I use it.
Milanote
Milanote is like having a giant pinboard with folders. You can upload anything onto it [yes even your main doc] and then draw over it or connect things with lines and arrows
Milanote lets you add up to a hundred things for free, not including drawing. This is one of the downsides of the site as I've found myself reaching that limit recently.
For me, the best part is being able to draw over stuff, and the color swatches.
Milanote is a lot less structured than other sites I've used, and personally, I don't think their templates are worth using.
8/10 overall, Milanote is what I mainly use. Here are some pics of how I use it:
Miro
Miro is a flowchart website mainly used for corporate jobs, however, it can be a great plotting tool for that reason
Miro has a lot of great starter templates if you are looking for a more structured freeform experience. It also comes with a blank page as well.
Unfortunately, I'd argue that it's a bit of a hard tool for beginners to use without a template, I've learned copy-paste is my best friend with Miro the hard way.
It's much better than most platforms at making timelines though.
It has a limit of three boards which is a bit disappointing but overall, I think it's worth the try.
5/10 Miro is very middle of the road for me due to the limited ability to customize things and the free limit. Here are some pics:
[I wrote that part weeks ago, I am now fully using Miro and believe it's the best for making timelines and charts, I just wish it let me make more boards 8/10]
Hiveword
This might be someone's jam, I can't really say it's mine though.
First off, the unpaid version is really just a few boxes saying "Write a summary here." which makes it just not worth it in my opinion
There really isn't any way to customise things which is my favorite part of most of these softwares
I've barely used this, so maybe there's something I'm missing but
1/10, Just use Google Docs at this point, here's a couple pics
World Anvil
People like this software, it's mainly used for tabletop, which is just a different way of writing adventure, and I've seen it recommended by authors.
Unfortunately, I'm going to disagree with a lot of people and say it's hard to use and isn't even really good at plotting.
I may be biased on this one as every time I've tried to use it in the past I've struggled. However, it seems like another just write it in a document and create a folder.
I'd say it's closer to an organizing tool, but even then just use something else.
3/10, I have nothing to say about it but maybe you'll enjoy it, all here are two photos
Campfire
This is the one I think I've heard the most about, but have never actually tried.
right off the bat, I'm going to say this is 100% worth it, you'll see at the end with the photos but this is like if Miro and World Anvil had an organization baby.
It's extremely easy to understand, and it makes timelines, it's more for writing your whole book but idk about that yet.
7/10, its themes are really pretty but it limits how much you can do to 20 I believe. Here are the photos
That's all for now, honestly, I think you should use Miro if you are looking to plot things out, and Milanote if you want to collect and organize your thoughts for writing, as that's what I do. Obviously what I like won't be for everyone, but hopefully, this helped you see some options
#writeblr#writers on tumblr#creative writing#worldbuilding#plotting#writing advice#writing tool#writing#writers#writing plans
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WHERE HAVE ALL THE STARK WIVES GONE AND WHERE ARE ALL THE COZ'S
aka i made the stark family tree from torrhen, the king who knelt all the way to the starklings & filled in some gaps too just for funsies. behold my magnum opus because i am a visual learner. some notes on the tree:
at the start of the tree, you’ll notice some lines are purple. those are not technically canon relations - we know those people existed but we aren’t told how they’re related or who their wives were. similar to my dornish timeline, i filled in a few gaps here based on the information we have to go off, some leaps in logic when it comes to the politics of the time, and some math.
similarly, you’ll notice some names in {brackets}. those are characters that we know exist but we don’t know their name (ie, we know alaric had two sons, we don’t know their names). i picked their names from other stark names.
the kids aren’t always in age order. i couldn’t get the graphic to line up in places bc of the cousin marriages and still keep everyone in age order, so i just gave up aksjd.
all the ones with the book sigil were Lords of Winterfell. all the ones with the show sigil were just born into the stark house.
alright now we got some explaining & rambling below the cut
george give the wives names. george at least give them a house. george pls you don't have to give her a personality just give her a freaking name george.
anyways!!! first things first, let's go into the names and houses i invented for everyone, starting from Torrhen's wife on the left and moving to the right:
Lady Manderly, the last Queen in the North - i think given the Manderlys are the #2 house, it was thematically fitting that the last Queen in the North was a Manderly! I also think it would make sense, given how common Iron Islander raiding was in this time, that Torrhen would want to strengthen his alliance with the house that owns his fleet. We also know the North’s fleet was pretty damn impressive at this time - Aegon uses them to fight several times after Visenya destroys the Vale’s fleet during the conquest.
Lady Dustin, wife to Brandon the Boisterous - Torrhen’s sons hate the Iron Throne and they’re all really pissed at the Stark Maiden-Ronnel Arryn marriage, so I figured Torrhen’s sons would want very fierce, very Northern wives (no offense to the Manderlys). Given Barrowton is one of the only true cities in the North, I thought marrying a family familiar with travelers, maybe a richer house even, might be seen as a benefit to staying strong against the Iron Throne.
Lady Flint, wife to Brandon the Boastful - Similar to Lady Dustin, I thought a strong Northern match would be what the sons of Torrhen would continue to go for. The Flints of Widow's Watch are considered the most powerful of the Flint houses so I thought that made a good match.
Lady Norrey, wife to Edwyn Stark - this one was fun & required some math and analysis. Basically, we know none of Alaric’s sons are married when Alysanne comes to visit, and Alaric is succeeded by his grandson, because both of his sons die before him. It means his grandson could be at the oldest 14 when he inherits. We also have Gyldayn say that some “Stark brothers” looked into seeing if Alysanne giving the New Goft was legal. I thought if Alaric & his sons were so annoyed by this, wouldn’t it make sense to marry into a house near the New Gift, who perhaps will be impacted by the decision and have the knowledge of the area and its history? Since the Norreys are right on the border, I thought that would be a good fit. I also thought it would be a good fit because Cregan married Arra Norrey just a bit later - and one pattern I noticed is that when a family marries into the Stark line once, they tend to remarry each other within a few generations again. They do this with the Blackwoods, the Lockes, AND the Royces - it’s likely the mothers & grandmothers influencing the matches, and I thought it was a fun pattern to repeat.
Lady Reed, wife to Artos Stark - So one thing we know is that Lynara Stark, Cregan's third wife, is not descended from the uncle who attempted to usurp Cregan but from a younger son of Brandon the Boisterous. I also noticed Lynara's son, Brandon, has an affair with a Fenn. The Fenns are sworn to House Reed, so I thought it made sense that this branch of the Starks has perhaps lived in the Neck, and brought a small household with her that included a Fenn or two that her son later has an affair with.
Lady Glover, wife to Ellard Stark - this is another “marry & remarry” match up but there I chose the Glovers also because I noticed the Starks tend to marry into the same few houses over and over again. These are likely their richest vassals and closest allies, so I thought again it would make sense that Ellard would pick a woman from a wealthy or important background as the succession crisis under Jaehaerys starts to kick off (in preparation for a fight, even if it's just a war of words). Since you have Gilliane Glover just a bit down, and I thought that would match up nicely with the "marry and remarry" trend as well.
NOW SOME ANALYSIS
Obviously there's been a lot said about the Sansa-Jonnel and Serena-Edric marriages that I don't really need to repeat at length but - I think the choice to have a Sansa and a Jonnel One-Eye marry is kind of sus, I think the "One-Eye" thing is sus, I think the niece-uncle connection here is kind of sus, and I think the fact that their mother was a Manderly is also sus.
There's also the fact that Serena has several sons and we have no idea what happened to them. That one stands out to me because of the Cregan-Lynara match; as stated above, Lynara is not, as some people assume, the daughter or granddaughter of Arnolf, the uncle that attempted to overthrow Cregan. Her Stark name comes all the way from a younger brother of Brandon the Boisterous. That's quite a few generations back that a Stark line has survived to remarry into the main line and we don't even know if she was an only child or had brothers and sisters. So Brandon's brothers' weren't just mysteriously offed/died out, but just two generations after Lynara, all of Serena's descendants just mysteriously die off? Nah, there's a story here that's hiding. The obvious suspect here is The She-Wolves of Winterfell story with Dunk & Egg. COMMA BUT. It's crazy that there are no Stark cousins in the modern day, no cadet House the way we have the Arryns of Gulltown, the Green Apple Fossoways, the Lannisters of Lannisport, etc., and also equally weird that Lynara's Stark line isn't a named cadet branch.
But let's get into the cadet/cousin branches in the modern day as well - one thing I noticed about the lack of Stark cousins in recent history (ie first and second cousins rather than like, seventh and eighth) is that a lot of them are female line cousins. Catelyn and Robb point this out in the book when Catelyn brings up the Vale Starks in the Templetons, the Royces, and the Waynwoods. I think the fact that Sansa is in direct contact with a host of those same families will come into play; perhaps when she unmasks herself as Sansa, someone will comment on her resemblance to Jocelyn, or maybe that familial connection will prompt a bit more loyalty out of one of Jocelyn's descendants if she has to make a mad dash out of the Vale.
And this is the same with Lyarra; she had a sister, Branda, who married a Rogers, which is a very minor Stormlands house. That stuck out in my head because I think this all really sets up the North to be ruled by Sansa; there are no male cousins or even female line male cousins (shout out Targaryen cousin Robert Baratheon) to step in and say "Well wouldn't you prefer a man as the Stark in Winterfell?" It's just Bran, Rickon, and Jon Snow that could possibly threaten her rule. It seems like she's very set up to echo her predecessor here but instead of Jonnel marrying her to steal her claim, Jon is likely to back up her claim, same as Bran.
And since I'm talking about namesakes here, let's dig into Arya Flint. There's two big associations here for Arya - Brave Danny Flint and the Wandering Wolf, Rodrik Stark. I think it's interesting that he served with the Second Sons, given that Arya is a Second Daughter, rather than the Stormbreakers, which was started by Oscar Tully. The moniker itself, Wandering Wolf, also makes me a bit excited for Arya's future; I've said before but I want Arya to do everything she wants to do and being so closely associated with a "Wandering Wolf" makes me think she will. The Danny Flint connection is also interesting here - there's the fact that Jon Snow, the sibling she's closest to, joins the Night's Watch (and even makes reference to Danny Flint), the fact that Danny dressed as a man and fought with a sword. Similar to the "Wandering" epithet potentially spelling out a happy ending for Arya, I am hopeful she'll have a happier ending than Danny Flint. But I do wonder if perhaps Arya will have some involvement with the Night's Watch, however it exists in the endgame.
Lastly - I'm so curious about Harrold Rogers. Did he help facilitate the friendship between Ned and Robert? Are the Rogers' still kicking around looking Starkish as hell? George where are all the cousins!!
#valyrianscrolls#house stark#the north#rani graphics#and the mummer's farce is almost done#the vale#sansa stark#arya stark#the wandering wolf#the queen in the north
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tss is kind of a weird manga if you think about it. I've been doing that a lot
its main goal is to be a sequel to flowers, and in that a sequel to the original shaman king, but then you read it and that's. really just the tip of the iceberg. tss is already a confusing, messy story if you know what it's doing, but if you go into it only having read og shaman king and flowers (like I did the first time around) you are going to be so lost
takei has this habit of reusing characters and concepts in his work, he's been doing it literally since the beginning. if we're counting each one separately (including alumi), he's written five anna the itakos. the anna that shows up in butsu zone is almost identical to anna from the original oneshot. he does this reduce reuse recycle thing in shaman king too, most obviously with anna and gandhara. and of course this continues into the mainline sequels.
flowers is interesting in comparison to tss, because it is a shaman king sequel in the way you'd expect. it repeats many of the same characters and plot beats as the original (apathetic main character, itako no anna fiance, edgy rival with a goth older sister). hana even mentions a few times that he doesn't want to relive the same beats as his father. compared to tss, the prior work flowers draws on the most is shaman king. for a few chapters. because then we get yahabe.
yahabe is probably the cleanest copy paste into the shaman king universe, excluding butsu zone. it was a oneshot that wrapped itself up after clearly defining its premise while leaving room for the story to continue. except, instead of this continuation being a full yahabe serialization, we just get yosuke in shaman king. yahabe!yosuke and mankin!yosuke could exist on the same timeline, and with how the flowers anime reuses shots from the yahabe manga and ova, that feels like what's supposed to be canon. any deviations from the shaman king canon in yahabe itself can easily be explained away by yahabe being from yosuke's perspective as a non-shaman who doesn't know what the hell is going on. he integrates so cleanly into flowers I didn't even know he was from something else until earlier this year. the same thing applies to death zero, because I fully forgot that was a different thing while writing this.
so flowers has shaman king, and yahabe, and death zero, and it sets up the main plot. and then there's tss.
tss is completely incomprehensible if you haven't done at least 30 chapters of external reading.
or, it's comprehensible, but it's also bad. the reading experience is made so much worse if, for example, you haven't read ultimo and don't know how terrifying not-stan lee actually is. or how important the themes of ultimo are to tss itself. ultimo is a conversation on the objectivity of good and evil, in the same way tss is a battle of ideologies between gods. if you haven't read ultimo, the dong family comes out of absolute nowhere and make even less sense then they do with context.
and then there's senju. the page where senju, when asked what he's learned on his 40 (20 in real actual life) year journey, smiles and says he "can't save people after all" is probably my favourite moment in anything takei's ever written. the weight of that statement means nothing to the reader who's only come from shaman king, because the senju we see in shaman king is sati saigan's spirit ally and nothing else. "I can't save people after all" is an answer to the main thesis of butsu zone, an answer given decades after that manga was cancelled to a collection of readers who might not even know what that is. it's an impactful moment if you've read butsu zone, if you know how it was cut short before takei could take the story where he wanted, if you know the creator has been writing about the same things, about the state of the world and doing what's right and how there are no bad people who can see ghosts, for decades. it makes you think about the thing you're currently reading, the sequel to the one story that author told that made it, that got to say its piece.
because takei's work is kind of cursed. his manga are frequently cancelled, his oneshots never picked up for serialization. the magazines his sequels run in getting cancelled themselves, leaving his stories in limbo. even shaman king, his most successful work, only got its true ending years after it concluded. there is so much in takei's work that has gone unsaid.
when senju stands in front of daremoine and says he can't save people, it's satisfying. it may have been what takei set out to write in 1997, or maybe it was something he thought of in the years between, but either way. this is the ending of butsu zone. this is how its theme's conclude. in the sequel to the sequel of a manga from which its original protagonist was a side character, and underdeveloped plotline. and when you've read butsu zone, it feels good, it feels complete. it hits you like a ton of bricks
this is why I think flowers and super star lose people. because they aren't sequels to shaman king. they're sequels to everything takei has ever written.
to get the most out of super star, you need to have read not only shaman king and its spinoffs, not only flowers, but butsu zone and ultimo and yahabe. hell, to understand shaman king you need to have read mappa douji, or the entire ending falls flat on its face
if you lean into it, this creates an interconnectedness to takei's work, a sense that what you're reading right now is a part of something bigger. whatever is being contemplated currently ties into a much larger conversation about society and morality spanning one man's entire career.
if you don't, you get... a bunch of messy stories. tss makes no bloody sense half the time. ultimo is insane enough on its own, and you're supposed to keep track of that and all the little changes that fit it into this timeline? not to mention the flaws in takei's writing itself, how he tends to pace things weird and leave gaps in his stories, all of it makes tss specifically pretty inaccessible to the average reader.
what is there to take away from this?
I'm not sure, really. I love tss, a lot actually. I enjoy the sense of discovery that comes with engaging in this twisted knot of a story. I think that if you tried to read tss with only shaman king and were frustrated, you should check out yahabe and ultimo and especially butsu zone and try again. you might still think it's a mess, but I think it's worth it to see if that's what lost you
but I know that's also a big ask, that's over 80 chapters of manga to read just to have the backstory for the insane stuff in tss. not everyone's up for that, and that's fair
do I think tss would be more accessible if it only drew from shaman king? yes. do I think it would have been better?
no
#shaman king#shaman king the super star#I have mixed feelings about takei's work and tss especially but I still really love it#I've been trying to condense these thoughts into some kind of video essay so consider this post a first draft#I'll probably think some more on this later
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I don't get this fandom's fixation with insisting Blitzo is the one who views relationships as transactional when there's so many examples of him obviously wanting to have more than that. IMP is basically his attempt to make himself a new family with Loona as his daughter and M&M first as the people he wants to threesome with but more realistically, his friends
Stolas meanwhile behaves in a much more transaction based mindset where he assumes if he gives X he can get Y
he views his cheating on Stella as not counting as cheating because 'cheating implies a betrayal and [Stella] never gave two shits about [him]'. Even though the marriage was arranged and he never loved Stella either (he somehow forgot he burst into tears when he first saw her and was miserable about the whole idea?) he expected Stella to make an effort to love him because that's how marriages work. He didn't seem to appreciate that it being arranged would make his partner's feelings more complex and things might have gone better if he hadn't tried to play happy families with her, despite the fact he also had reservations about the arrangement and is gay so he should be able to empathize with Stella on some level
he assumes giving Via a trip to Loo Loo Land in the hopes of getting back their close bond but it isn't until he actually listens to her that any progress is made (and while on the trip he actively upsets her by harassing Blitzo right in front of her)
but the bigger example of course is Blitzo. he uses the book to get sex out of him, literally describing what they have as 'favors for favors' and 'transactional'
then he lowkey kind of does it again when he uses the crystal in the hopes of getting a romantic relationship in return
Stolas is so fixated on the idea of Blitzo as an object who just fulfils his desires that he punishes him whenever he has a life of his own to attend to (taking Loona for the jab) or whenever Blitzo points out his fantasies are not reality (replying to 'that's a romcom' with 'fuck you'). He's so committed to this that despite knowing Blitzo's insecurities he dances with someone else because that person is giving him attention and that's all that matters.
And when Blitzo doesn't respond to the crystal with what Stolas wanted to get out of the interaction - a romantic partner - Stolas dips immediately. He doesn't explain himself and he doesn't make any attempt to keep Blitzo in his life. It's incel logic at its core - he doesn't want Blitzo in his life even as a friend, despite the fact he supposedly likes him, because ultimately he doesn't actually see Blitzo as a person. he's an object who is supposed to fulfil the transaction Stolas is still unconsciously setting up
worse than that is Stolas has fooled himself into believing he's the good guy who was doing good things for him out of the kindness of his heart. he reframes exchanging his book for sex as 'supporting him', reframes humiliating him in front of a crowd by sexualizing him as 'letting everyone see how much [he] likes [Blitzo]', talks about his passive aggressive texts trying to get Blitzo to still come over on the full moon as 'wanting to spend time with [Blitzo]' even though those nights were probably going to end with Blitzo feeling like he had to sleep with Stolas, again
tl:dr but so far Via is the only person who can break her end of whatever exchange Stolas views an interaction as being without him getting pissy about it, since he tries to empathize with her even when he repeats the exact same mistake 5 minutes later. he doesn't care Stella was forced into marriage too since he expected her to play house because that's what he was doing, and he cares so little about Blitzo despite saying he thinks highly of him that not only does he not want his friendship, he's happy to ghost him after their fight in full moon then for a full month going into ghostfuckers. Blitzo didn't give him what he wanted and Stolas doesn't actually care about his feelings, so Blitzo may as well not exist
This fandom, and increasingly Viv, don't seem to have the first clue what Blitzo is or what his problem is or what he wants. He just does things in whatever order, according to what makes Stolas look better.
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mixing whb with tkdb again... What do you think each ghoul's biggest fetish is?
Sorry for filing up your inbox so often 😭😭😭
Tkdb boys idiosyncrasies (18+)
‧₊˚✿Masterlist✿˚₊‧
♦ Don't worry at all! I'm glad someone's interested in my writing! ^^ I also went all out with their full idiosyncrasies like all the WHB demons have, so I hope you don't mind ^^ ♦
⋆。˚ ☁︎ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
Jin
Master/Servant play
A Prince of Frost, who'd do anything to keep his peace. The only ones allowed into his chambers is his trusty servant Tohma and you. He might be cold, but should you tempt him, things will heat up fast.
Tohma
Capnolagnia (smoking)
Timophilia (gold, wealth and high social status)
If you feel a pair of observing eyes on yourself while in Frostheim, rest assured it's the Prince's advisor. Fear not, however, he's merely making sure you cause no trouble. He's usually the center of attention during Frosteim's balls.
Lucas
Crurophilia (legs)
In search for his twin brother, Lucas finds little to no time to relax between studying and training. Many other students, including his good friend Kaito, have said he simply needs some healthy distraction.
Kaito
Mazophilia (boobs)
Katoptronophilia (mirror sex)
As confident he is, the moment you're around reduces Kaito to a babbling mess. Give him a few moments and he'll compose himself only to attempt charming you.
⋆˚✿˖°
Alan
Sthenolagnia (muscles and displays of strength)
Asphyxiophilia (choking) - after he overcomes the fear of hurting others on accident
A gentle giant with an air of danger who is like the older brother of all his fellow Vagastrom students. Some gossips say he's done some bad things in his past, but nobody dares or knows to say what.
Leo
Autagonistophilia (being in front of an audience/camera)
A small social media influencer with a tongue sharper than most blades. Him and his partner in crime, Sho, are the primary source of trouble in the Vagastrom dorm with Leo being the sole insinuator.
Sho
Amaurophilia (blindfold kink)
The students of Vagastrom are known to never pass up a good fight and Sho is no different. You're likely to either run into him at his food truck or in the Vagastrom garagaes, tending to his bike Bonnie.
⋆˚✿˖°
Haru
Doraphilia (texture/feel of fur/animal skin)
The naughty and energetic president of Jabberwock who carries his son Peekaboo around everywhere. If you're not shy ask to pet him, he'll let you, and then he'll also let you pet Peekaboo too.
Towa
Dendrophilia (plants) - plants need love too, ig (sorry, again T-T)
A romantically oriented ghoul with a very light-hearted and curious nature. Don't let that fool you, though, his hugs are that of an anaconda about to strangle its prey. He's so in tune with the nature he eats flowers and the weather reflects his emotions.
Ren
Fictophilia (fictional characters)
A gamer who, despite being chosen into an outdoorsy and hardworking Jabberwock, has the right opposite personality traits. He's an overthinking homebody and will refuse to do even the slightest tasks unless he gains a reward or an achievement for it.
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Taiga
Anthropophagy (cannibalism) sorry
Erotophonophilia (murder)
The lunatic president of Sinostra, with very particular tastes. Anyone who's seen him eat will tell you he doesn't mind getting his face dirty while devouring his meal. His impulsivity makes him very trigger-happy.
Romeo
Hoplophilia (guns)
Romeo is a perfectionist and expects nothing less from his partner either. Curiously, one of his closest Sinostra residents is Taiga, who is nothing of that sort. After spending some time around Romeo, you will find yourself getting whipped into shape.
Ritsu
Hybristophilia (criminals, people who committed crimes)
Dikephilia (justice)
Always striving for justice, yet always seeming to condone criminals' behaviour as evident by his lack of interference and defense of Sinostra's president. Perhaps his moral compass more arched than expected?
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Subaru
Chirophilia (hands)
A legacy-bound actor who constantly worries about minuscule things. His compassion knows no bounds even if it might place him into a dangerous situation. His fellow students would say he simply needs a reassurance from someone he trusts.
Haku
Stigmatophilia (tattoos and piercings)
Capnolagnia (smoking) - you couldn't pry this HC from my cold dead hands
Some students might describe him as nothing but nice, and yet some account him to be a mischievous flirt. Both are true, but only his chosen person gets to fully experience how real those rumors are.
Zenji
Metrophilia (poetry)
A truly gifted poet constantly seeking for another source of ideas for his erotic poetry collection. Loves seeking out new partners to inspire his writing and doesn't shy away from describing acts between him and his partner in his poems.
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Edward
Hematolagnia (Drinking/seeing blood)
Odaxelagnia (biting/being bitten)
The ever so thirsty president of Obscuary, though barely few students could testify to seeing him in the flesh. His chambers are only for the most resilient due to the lingering smell of death and mess of clothes, his or someone else's.
Rui
Voyeurism
Calygnephilia (beautiful women)
To many students and employees he is known as a bartender. To many female students, he is known as an irresistible flirt, but who really knows what happens at his bar after the closing hours?
Lyca
Autozoophilia (being/acting like an animal) - for him it's his wolf form
Amychophilia (getting scratched/scratching)
A young werewolf, who is still struggling to navigate living in the human world. He's very curious and eager to learn. He may come off as a bit intense, but those are only his wolf instincts coming out.
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Yuri
Piquerism (cutting/stabbing someone with a sharp objects)
His personality strongly resembles Henry Frankenstein, which is a reputation he gladly upholds. The image is even enhanced when his assistant is around. In the surgeon's eyes, humans are only interesting or mediocre specimen.
Jiro
Free use kink
A stoic and reserved medical assistant, who isn't opposed to most things. His mobility may not be the best, but he will try. He may not feel strong happiness or pleasure himself, but seeing his partner experience them is enough for him.
#tkdb#tokyo debunker#tokyo debunker smut#tkdb smut#jin kamurai#tohma ishibashi#lucas errant#kaito fuji#alan mido#leo kurosagi#sho haizono#haru sagara#towa otonashi#ren shirinami#taiga hoshibami#romeo lucci#ritsu shinjo#subaru kagami#haku kusanagi#zenji kotodama#edward hart#rui mizuki#lyca colt#yuri isami#jiro kirisaki
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Another quick shot ideas on- Tf 141: Mafia AU!
Link to Prev parts:
Currently on Ch 2- Mini Epilogue, and you can find it here :D 👇
A/N: 1st Edit of adding onto Price’s part + the other TF 141 boiyos will get their own on a separate post✨
So here’s the sitch folks
Price👏has👏the👏moola
Which means that he will not hesitate to spend it all for you
But he keeps it lowkey, he isn’t the show-y type (cough Soap cough)
So he starts slow, aside from giving you his apparels, he wants to give something to call your own
But if he asks what you want, you’d suspect him
‘Smart sweetie,’ he thinks, whenever he sees you give him that inquisitive look
Eyebrow raised, a knowing smirk
If only you knew the things you do to this man behind closed doors
He starts giving you simple stuff, a bracelet - something that was sleek in design but had good value (both sentimentally and economically)
Because, when he gave that bracelet to you
It was the day he, tells himself this, officially fell for you- wanting to do his damnest to court you however possible way he can
Imagine a cold December, the worst possible season ever for you.
You hate the cold, as much as how it cool it becomes when the rain rolls in and rattles your bones.
No, you’re not old, just weary.
You always hated the rain, but why- as you stood hand-in-hand with this mafia boss- did you want the rain to continue.
Currently, you were running through the rain with him, laughing all the way until you found a tiny closed up shop with an awning over it.
Pointing at it with a quick, “over there! Som cover!”
Price nods and speeds up his pace, making you squeal— complaining that he should slow down or you’ll both slip but he insists.
“I’ll catch you,” he says so reassuringly, “don’t worry.”
And you didn’t.
Even when you both slid under the awning, with you almost slipping past-- but luckily he was there.
You then realize he is a man of his word.
Catch you he will, and catch you he did.
With his hands on your waist, you swore to yourself that you haven’t felt this more secure than ever in your life.
John Price on the other hand, was tethering-- barely able to keep his hands to himself once he got a taste on holding you in his arms.
He pulled you closer, not letting his hands leave you for a second, as he lets his inhibitions go, resulting with his arms wrapping around you securely. (That even if you did try to escape you wouldn't be able to- not like you wanted to anyways.)
Once he fells no resistance coming from you, he breathes in deep, trying to live in the moment as much as possible as you relax in his hold- both of your giggles dying out and letting the patter of rain consume space instead.
"You know," you whisper, "I hate the rain."
You could feel Price's chest rumble, and his voice respond right next to your ear.
"I know that, lovie."
You let that stew in you, humming out a reply that just came to the top of your head.
"But I don't hate it right now."
Price wanted to ask why, but he knew-- inside he knew why you didn't at that moment. Though it didn't feel right to voice his thoughts at the moment and simply holds you closer instead, hoping to reassure you through it that,
'its okay to hate things most of the time, but then like it when you're with someone.'
And he thinks to himself, maybe... it was like that with you too.
He never liked going out on dates- he never had time for those frivolous things.
He wasn't a gift giver, but always found himself giving you whatever you wanted or needed.
He wasn't a lover, but damned the world and his existence would be if he couldn't find himself not to love you.
Squeezing his arms close to you made him snap back to his reality, the reality that you were in arms-reach.
And that tether?
Now fully loose and wrapped around you-- just as his arms are.
Once you arrived back at your apartment, John knew that now was the right time.
So he tugs at your coat from the bottom of the stairs, barely able to catch you before you leave his sight.
“Hey.”
He watches you turn around, a crooked smile on your face as you copy him.
“Hey?”
“I-,” he stumbles, “-could you..?”
He lips feels dry, the saliva he gulps becomes hard to do with his throat feeling like sandpaper, his hands get clammy and he has to shove it down his pocket to avoid you seeing it shake.
You stare at him, head tilted as you return back his words to him- hoping to coax out whatever he wanted to get out.
“Could I..?”
With a deep breath, he forces eye contact with and asks,
“Will you accept this?”
From deep within the recess of his pocket, he hands you a small dark navy leathered covered box, gold engraving on its front— and it made you pause.
“John…” you step down the stairs to stand chest to chest with him, “…what’s this for?”
You wrapped your hands around his, entrapping the box between his hands.
If there was moment in his life where he felt his heart drop in- this would be the number one.
What if he overstepped—?
Moved too soon, way too early? Fuck- he just messed up didn’t he-?
“John?”
But your voice forces him to resurface from the deep spiral and he shakes his head. Splitting him from fantasy and reality.
He tries to ground himself further by dropping his head to lock eyes with you, and he swore that the stars still shined in them, just as the day he met you.
“I,” he licks his chapped lips, “I thought of you when I saw this.”
You released his hands for him to open it and once he did, you gasped, eyes snapping back and forth from the silver bracelet and his face- oh his face.
It was so twinged in nervousness but at the same time, a sense of softness and vulnerability that you instinctively knew that he never shows this kind of side of him to anyone.
“I got a couple of charms on it,” he points out with a chuckle, “thought it’d be nice to add onto it whenever we go to places.”
“Like a keepsake…” you mutter, thoughts unable to be kept within as you feel your chest tighten.
He nods, “precisely.”
“And this,” he points to the rain droplet charm, “will be a reminder of today.”
Any thought that came onto your brain was incoherent and words, if it were to be spoken right now, felt too cheap to say.
So you settle for a hug, one so tight and comforting that Price greedily wishes that he could be in it forevermore.
Eventually you had to let go, dry your eyes, and tuck in for the night.
“John!”
You call out one last time by your window, and said man turns, his usual smile softened by the glow of the moon.
“I kinda like the rain now!”
His laughter resounds through the night as he carries your words next to his heart.
‘One day,’ he thinks to himself, ‘one day we’ll get to fill up that bracelet.’
#tf 141 mafia au#unedited#crackfic#cod x reader#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#cod mw2#price x reader#john price#cod john price#price x you#captain price x reader#captain price x you
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It's A Man's World
Chapter 5 (Batter up)
a/n: To clarify, I do not own the rights to any pictures or names used in this story, except for Sierra Riley. All other rights and names belong to the NFL and MLB. Additionally, some characters are inspired by the game MLB The Show 24, which includes fictional characters. The title of the book is inspired by the song "It's a Man's World" by James Brown and Betty Jean Newsome, for which I also do not own the rights. All rights are held by Warner-Tamerlane Publishing Corp. and Unichappell Music, Inc. Enjoy!
If you had told me 10 years ago that I would be playing for the Atlanta Braves, I would have told you. You're lying, but here I am. After the draft, I had to fly to Florida for spring training, and then when that was over, I flew to Atlanta to sign my rookie contract, which is $380k for my first year plus a 2 million signing bonus. Then fly to Cincinnati for my first game for the season. Safe to say I've had a crazy couple of weeks.
Oh and how fitting that Joe is throwing out the first pitch since its Reds opening day. So it's really true what they say. It does come full circle.
I walked out from the clubhouse into the away dugout. I noticed Joe in the batter's box swinging a bat at baseballs as they fired out the shooter and must I say he looked damn good while doing it too.
Ok, time I come clean about something. Do I have a crush on my best friend Joe Burrow? Yes. Am I scared to tell him? Yes. Why? because if I do I'm going to make a complete fool of myself and I just do not want to risk that and possibly losing a friend.
But friends don't text each other every day for random things or have late-night phone conversions like they used to when they were in LSU together. To sum it up over the last couple of months Joe and I have slipped back into our old ways and not that I'm complaining I just wish we were more.
I noticed Joe had finished and might as well say hello. I walked out towards home plate catching the tail end of his conversation “I'm so proud of her…to watch her play in college I knew she was big league bound and now she's here.” I heard Joe tell my teammate Austin Riley, a third baseman.
“There's the woman of the hour!” I hear Ja’marr call out as I make my way toward the group, my heart racing with a mix of excitement and nerves.
I shake my head, feeling a bit overwhelmed. “Stop! I'm done crying for today,” I reply, my voice tinged with a slight whine, reflecting the emotional rollercoaster I've been on.
Ja’marr looks at me with a supportive smile. “How do you feel? Are you ready for this?” he asks, his eyes filled with genuine concern. I nod slowly, trying to muster a confident expression despite my jitters. “I feel ready; I’m just trying not to overthink everything,” I admit, forcing a nervous smile.
“Sis, you’ve got this in the bag!” Ja’marr encourages, his voice steady and reassuring. “Don’t let them cloud your mind—just play your heart out, like you do every time.” His words resonate with me, pushing back the self-doubt that threatens to creep in.
“Ri, you’ve worked your ass off for this moment,” Joe chimes in, giving me a playful nudge on my shoulder. “You’re going to absolutely kill it today! And we just happen to have front-row seats to witness your brilliance.” His enthusiasm and belief in me fill me with warmth and motivation.
Nodding, I accept their words with a grateful smile, feeling a rush of confidence. “Thanks, you guys! That really helps. But now I have to ask: what the hell is this?” I say, gesturing pointedly at the Cincinnati jerseys they are both proudly wearing. They burst into laughter, clearly thinking they could charm their way out of my noticing their blatant team allegiance.
“Hey it was a gift from them but believe me I would wore yours if I could” Ja'marr gives his excuse. I turn to Joe waiting for his.
“I'm from Ohio.” he gives the most obvious answer—typical Joe.
------
Against all odds, Joe delivered a flawless pitch after the pregame festivities and the stirring national anthem. I could feel the excitement coursing through me—this was my moment, my MLB debut.
As they called my name, I heard Joe and Ja’marr erupting with cheers from their private suite through the crowd their support only boosted my confidence and set the stage for what was about to happen.
I locked in my focus, ready to face the pitcher. He glanced at the runner on first, then turned his gaze to me and wound up for the throw.
The pitch came rushing straight at me! I instinctively jumped back, narrowly avoiding it. “One ball, no strikes.” But that wasn’t a mistake; he wanted to rattle me. Too bad for him—I’m not easily shaken.
I reset myself, gripping the bat firmly, ready for the next challenge. The pitcher checked the runner again and delivered another pitch.
This time, he made a crucial misstep—an offspeed pitch! I saw it coming, and without hesitation, I swung with all my power. The crack of the bat was electric, and I sent that ball soaring out of the park. A home run on my very first hit! 2-0, baby! Now that’s how you make an unforgettable debut.
-------
We won only by the skin of our teeth 5-4. I had just changed out of my away uniform into some sweets and a hoodie when I heard a knock on my locker room door.
“It's open” I shout, not feeling like walking to the door.
The door opens and Joe pops his head in “Hey can I come in?”
I waved my hand “Yeah come on”
He steps in closing the door behind him “Getting ready to head out just wanted to say you looked great out there today” he compliments.
“Thanks, I had to show off a bit, you know. Oh! I meant to give this back to you, but everything just happened so fast,” I said, remembering his chain that he gave to me to wear on Daft Night. But I never did give it back to him. If I remember right, I was in my gym bag. Bingo pulled it right out.
I went to hand it back to him be he stopped me “Keep it Ri”
“Huh?” I said making sure I heard him right. This boy is crazy.
Joe cracked a little smile “Keep it...believe me I've got plenty”
I looked at him to make sure he wasn't joking “You sure cause this is worth more than my signing bonus” I joked nervously.
He smiled and nodded his head “Yeah I'm sure think of it as an ‘I knew you would make it’s gift”.
I smiled “Ok no take takebacks Burrow,” I said putting back in my bag.
“What are you doing when you leave here?” Joe asked suddenly. I shrugged my shoulders. “It's still early so I'm not really tired. Might just chill back at the hotel. Why what's up?” I answered taking a seat on the bench.
He looks at me for a second then slightly shakes his head. “Some friends of mine wanted to go out to eat and all but Ja'marr had to leave soo…”
“You want me to go in his place?” I finished the sentence for him.
This is not anything new. I went to a lot of Joe's events as his plus one back in LSU. And he did the same thing for me.
“Yeah but if you want to call it a day I understand” he quickly says.
I shake my head with a laugh “No I'll go with you, Joe. Plus it would be nice to get a breather before tomorrow's game” I said, opening up my suitcase.
“Give me a few to get changed and I'll be right out”
Joe raised his eyebrows “You really could go in what you have on” he said nonchalantly
Is this boy out of his mind? “Joe I'm not hanging out around people I don't know in a hoodie and sweatpants,” I said looking at him all upside his head.
“Yes, you can cause one where only going to Texas Roadhouse. Two you just finished a hell of a baseball game and have a right to wear this. And if someone has a problem with it then we can go and have our own dinner” he says the confidence just flows out as he says it.
My stomach should have not tightened up but I just love how protective this man is. Biting my lip not knowing what to say except “Alright let's go”
-------
Joe was walking me up to my room after that impromptu hangout session with his friends which by the way all amazing.
“Yeah I'm definitely paying for this tomorrow,” I said feeling like I was ready to pop.
Joe gives out a small chuckle “Yeah that makes two of us”
I give him this funny look “You got time to burn it off, Joe. I on the other hand have to play a game tomorrow” I said pulling out my keycard for my room. “Fair point Far point,” Joe said not disagreeing with me
Stopping in front of my room “This is me” I said turning to Joe “Thanks again for inviting me” I said suddenly nervous as I looked at him and his features pretty blue eyes, dirty blonde hair so silky you could run your fingers through it and not get tangled. To some it up this boy was fine.
His voice knocked me out of my thoughts “No thank you for coming. I owe you one for this Ri”
Yeah, a date.
“What’d you say” I saw Joe's eyebrows raise..Did I say that out loud could have sworn I said that in my head.
“I didn't say anything,” I said quickly shaking my head trying to avoid this conversation at all costs.
“Nah, Nah you said something. What did you say?” he asked stepping a little closer. Looking the other way with a blush on my cheeks “I said a date” I repeat my words still not looking a him.
He stood there with the biggest smirk on his face “I still didn't hear what you said say it again and this time” he paused to gently grab my chin “Look at me”
Soaked absolutely Soked straight through.
Unable to move I said it again looking straight dead in his eyes “A date. You owe me a date”
Joe nodded his head and let my chin go “That's what I thought you said” he said stepping away from me. “Ok, how about this. If you get to the World Series which I know you will I'll take you on a date” he said proposing a challenge or more like a bet. “Ok and if I don’t,” I said waiting for the catch no pun intended.
“Then I still take you on the date’
#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow#joe burrow fic#cincinnati bengals#black!reader#joe burrow x oc#joe burrow x black reader
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Maybe you have an electronic device that barely works anymore but you can't replace yet. Maybe you struggle in classes because you don't understand a thing and don't like what you're studying at all. Maybe you realised some of your "friends" aren't exactly good people and you may have to cut ties with them soon. Maybe your big project might never become real no matter the energy you put in it. Or you just lost hope in this world because what the fuck is wrong with some people?...
But that doesn't undermine those hours having a good time with kind internet strangers on a silly online game. This one creation you're very proud of (doesn't have to be a drawing, could be anything you made). Those happy memories you made in the past with people you'll never forget, even if they end up forgetting you. Or the new ones you'll make with the friends you've made recently. That very cool YouTube playlist you found that hits just right. That one music or sound that soothes your mind. Or maybe that medication you took is doing its effect and calming your mental health symptoms, your pain, or even making your voice deeper if it's T.
So remember those moments when you must do that task you've put off for way too long. Go through that rough period of time. So go do that homework you've been putting off. Go wash your binder if you own one. Go do some sport if you have the energy to. Remember even if it's hard at first, that you can do it, even one task a day at a time. Can't do it today? Who knows, maybe tomorrow will be your lucky day!
(Those are examples from my own life to motivate myself to do those things I listed, but feel free to think of your own positive stuff and stuff you must do and go through. Also sorry for the long post I felt like writing this... instead of doing my homeworks, ironically. Oops-)
#mintpigeon.txt#ramble#i should go do my homeworks............ i should follow my own advice#positivity
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a beam of sunlight crosses his handsome face. rey glances up to watch the clouds part, silent appreciation for thor's gesture nestling into her bones. a knot within her seems to unwind and, after a moment, a gentle, content sigh leaves her lips. instantly, rey starts to feel her energy increase. the sun warms her skin and the planet around them. in turn, it feeds its life to her. she is acutely aware of every blade of grass beneath their feet, every flower and tree nearby. rey leans back against thor's chest and soaks the sun in like one of them.
it is quite PEACEFUL, even more so when she feels his head lean into hers. rey lets her eyes slide shut, appreciating the quiet. thor is so close she can feel the beat of his heart, the way his chest rises and falls with each breath. rey turns in to tuck herself closer to him, as if they are in bed and she is reluctant to slip from the sheets and greet the day. the war is won, after all.
unfortunately, that doesn't mean their work is over. as she is lifted to her feet, rey opens her eyes, stretching her arms above her head. it is quite a loaded question; neither conversation will be EASY. both come with their own challenges, complexities she has been enjoying not considering for these last few moments.
there is an apology that must be made to finn. more discussion that must happen about their future, about all she'd said and had allowed to be left unsaid. when thought about THAT WAY, the tactical conversation with poe seems much simpler. "poe," rey murmurs, then. she clears her throat. "let's get his reports and start to think of a plan for the next few days so we can start sending people off. i'm sure there are at least a few squadrons already starting to get restless."
she squeezes his hand, following behind thor with a smile. it is sweet, how he tugs her along. how he keeps her close, how he refuses to relinquish his grip. "the conversation with finn will be longer. i want to give it the attention it deserves -- without distraction. talking to poe will take some things off my mind." the noise of the OTHERS grows louder, the closer they come. the peace of the jungle is replaced by the snippets of chatter she overhears as their team members wave and call out to her.
but she stops before they reenter the room, concern making her still. immediately, rey feels GUILTY -- he is right; she had hidden things from him. she hadn't called when she needed his help, hadn't wanted to ruin his travels. she hadn't wanted to ask. even now, part of her believes she has burdened him with some unnamed heaviness, something he can't possibly want to deal with or care about. yet here he is, asking her for more. it is a phenomenon she's not sure she'll ever understand.
rey hesitates, looking down at her toes. "you were dealing with a lot," she reminds, trying not to be too defensive. is it so wrong to not want to add to that load? he must know she never intended for any of this to happen. "it's not that i... don't want to tell you." alongside what he has already guessed, she was also AFRAID. afraid of his reaction, or that thor might not understand. that he would be afraid of what she might do, like she knows her friends were. she bites at the inside of her cheek. "i promise i will try to be more forthcoming in the future. i just ask that you're patient with me. it's somewhat of a... new concept."
“you helped.”
reverently does thor stare up at her, from beneath his lashes. their faces are so close that he can see clearly all the details of hers. the scar on her cheek, each individual freckle. the subtle beginnings of lines at the corners of her eyes. love, content, appreciation in her eyes — everything he feels mirrored back at him.
“please, know that. it may not feel like it — that fault is only my own — but you did. more than anyone could have. if not for you, i… don’t believe i could have survived these last five years. i don’t believe i would have wanted to.”
it is an uncomfortable truth. everything between them had become so distant, so strained. thor’s emotions clouded everything good — even her. all her attempts, lifelines that they were, were shot down. so much arguing followed by tense silence, and still… rey was the only thing that remained for him to look forward to. to brighten his days, even if it was barely visible through the storm clouds. where would he have been without that? that fight surely would have been his last. who could possibly endure such nothingness?
silence falls over him — content and comfortable. thor simply basks in her touch and her closeness. he says nothing as he grants her request; above them, the clouds begin to dissipate and the shine of the sun breaks through. grey skies give way to clear blue. at the same time, he pulls her further into his lap, his arm holding her protectively against him. first his chin meets her shoulder, then he tilts his head against hers.
for many moments, he simply appreciates the serenity. the golden rays of the sun peaking through the jungle trees, the sounds of animals scurrying about now that the ground warms. he doesn’t know exactly how much time has passed when he at last lifts his head, presses a kiss to the base of her neck, and turns his eyes up toward her again.
“who would you like to see first: poe, or finn?” hands on her hips, he is careful in lifting rey off of him and settling her on her feet. he rises behind her without relinquishing his hold. each step he takes is slow; tenderly, he guides her along with him. “i had mentioned earlier, there are things i think you and finn have to discuss. possibly… privately.” regardless, the direction he takes them in will lead them back inside.
more members pass them by, and thor’s small smile is more genuine, now, as he nods to them in greeting. but upon approaching the threshold of the medcenter, thor’s head dips, and his voice lowers.
“similarly… you have withheld a lot recently. i believe it stems from fear of not wanting to burden anyone. you believe everyone’s personal problems are enough to bear, correct? and you don’t wish to add to it. i don’t want you to do that anymore — not ever again, not with me.” there is a firmness in his voice that hadn’t previously been there, but there is only concern in thor’s eyes as he watches her. “if there is something that must be said, you say it. you tell me what troubles you. i promise to do the same. hiding from one another… it only hurts us both, in the end.”
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