#don’t care if someone is a horror writer or writes about toxic relationships

[wickjump]

ok seriously though whoever the hell that anon is like seriously stop. i did not think? i had to say this?? but maybe don’t bring up my sexual trauma in my inbox and use that to psychoanalyze me??? because of the genre i write???? i promise you the skeleton does not care. i promise you this so hard. nobody is being traumatized or offended by this. especially not the character. i promise you cross is not offended or hurt or upset and neither is jakei. i am writing horror because it is a genre i enjoy. you have no need to pry into my personal life to ‘figure me out’ and convince me to stop writing in a very popular genre because it is weird to you or makes you uncomfortable. what makes me uncomfortable is when you try to insert yourself and act holier than thou. you are not better than me because you view the very popular genre i like as morally wrong you’re just a dick

[quinloki]

hello, sorry if this is too real of an ask if you're not feeling too well recently, but I've been meaning to ask if you have any advice when it comes to tackling really dark topics in fanfics?? I've been meaning to write a darkfic with the Kid pirates main 4 as slasher movie villains (think Jason Voorhees vibes) with a touch of yandere tendencies, so there's not gonna be a lot of comfort/fluff in this fic. this is naturally gonna be hard to write especially when it comes to wanting to write dark and disturbing scenes without wanting to glorify or romanticise abusive behavior or stockholm syndrome, not to mention not wanting to upset or trigger survivors, especially as one myself, so any advice would be lovely. thank you ^-^

I’m going to start this off with what I think should be your most important takeaway from this:

It’s okay to romanticize abuse in fiction.

It’s okay to romanticize horror, murder, etc. etc. in fiction.

Fiction is where we can do the really uncomfortable stuff. Where we can explore the darks part of existing, because it’s good to be able to go “I connect with this and I should consider why.” Or “this brings me comfort, how can I break that down?” Stuff like that.

Sometimes it helps us realize a view or understanding we had that we thought was good is inherently flawed. (I am reminded of viewers being very angry when they realized the character in The Boys they connected with was *not* a good guy and did not get redeemed.)

What we have to be careful about is not condoning such themes in reality.

Horror movies and books go into deep dark territory all the time, but often hobby writers can be held to odd standards by comparison, which gets a bit frustrating at times.

How to avoid that AND present dark fic properly?

On Ao3 and tumblr just tag your story - character death, gore, stalking, Stockholm syndrome, abuse, toxic relationship, dubcon, noncon as applicable, excessive descriptions of blood and gore, etc.

You don’t have to get specific - you don’t have to say who dies/survives. You can admit to “this has a bad end” if you want - I had a webcomic warn me about that and it was NOT kidding.

Some responsibility is on the writer for dark fic, yes, but honestly that’s just in terms of being sure you label it well. Avoiding and heeding those tags is solely on the reader - as long as you didn’t, say, write about disarticulation in exacting detail without warning “excessive descriptions of blood and gore”.

You can put additional warnings in the summary, or even as a heads up before a particularly intense chapter.

And, you’re not going to be perfect. If someone says “hey can you add [x] tag?” Be open to it - but don’t add any and every tag requested - sometimes people can be demanding in tag requests and you have the right to decide where the line really is.

For example someone might ask that you add a tag involving eye-trauma. It’s a squick of mine, people getting injured on, in, around their eyes, and I wouldn’t be upset with a heads up - but I also think it’s covered under warnings of gore.

Someone might ask that you tag a specific character’s death - personally? I wouldn’t. “Character death” is enough. “Slasher/horror” honestly should really be enough cause even though I don’t watch horror movies I have a keen understanding that you do not get attached to characters in a horror story.

As long as you hit the broad strokes, I think that’s enough. The idea is that no one wants to walk into a slasher when they were expecting fluff.

As for taking care of ourselves as writers while we write dark content, that’s harder to give advice on. I really have to be in a steady frame of mind to write dark stuff, but if I know there’s vindication in there somewhere it’s much easier. (There’s a stalker in A Light Touch that gets his due and as someone who has had more than 6, it was cathartic to write.)

But sometimes there’s catharsis in the bad guy winning too. You’ve got to understand those lines for yourself - I can’t really give you advice cause it’s so different for everyone. But listen to yourself.

If it feels like a slog, leave it.

If it’s not getting out of your mind, write it.

You’re not “weird” if you write your darkest shit when you’re happiest, or vice versa. What you need to do is just keep an eye on yourself - there is no world in which you should suffer in order to write “good dark content”.

For better or worse, that’s the best advice I have - I hope it’s helped ^_^

[avese23]

Can’t deal with people who act all personally aggrieved that they can’t personalize the entire internet to their personal happy place. Especially people who then go out looking for things to get mad at

(This isn’t about people venting about trolls or harassment. It sucks. I’m sorry. Fuck bullies and bigots. This also isn’t about flash warnings, and anything that keeps people with epilepsy safe)

But like, it’s not other people’s job to read your mind and guess what hyperspecific trigger you have then manually tag everything for one person. I’ve seen people ask creators to tag images with the character their blog is about. Just block the blog. That’s not a safe blog for you.

It’s not other people’s job to explain that fucked up shit in fiction is not real. You’re not a child and we’re not your parents here to hold your hand and reassure you that the actor is only playing dead.

I think a good example of effective content warnings is Hazbin. They’re not gonna put one up every individual episode to tell you a show full of swearing and gore is gonna have swearing and gore. But episode 4 is more graphic than any other episode so it’s given a separate warning. Because someone signing up for the rest of the episodes might genuinely be taken aback by that one.

Or Hashtag Ruthless Productions always putting heavy topics in their politics section. Asking for a warning every episode would be silly when you can just skip the politics section. You know it’s gonna be venting and politics. So don’t be surprised when it’s about politics. But if they talk about dark topics that aren’t typically brought up in that fandom they do give warning. For instance most people wouldn’t expect a discussion about eating disorders when the hosts talk about the cult in Wayward Son. Or a spoiler for Star Trek in a podcast about Buffy. So *then* it makes sense.

It’s social kindness and being stewardess to recognize when you as a creator are putting out something unexpectedly and objectively shocking to people who didn’t consent to it. It’s not other people’s job however, to use common sense for you. Or to read your mind. Don’t click on a video about a movie and get mad at spoilers for that mobile. Don’t read the Bible and get mad about major character death (Christian’s don’t come after me with a ‘well actually’ I haven’t read it 😭)

Speaking of Christianity if you’re someone who gets mad at Christian’s being upset by goths wearing crosses (which is silly) but then get upset by what people are writing about your blorbos on ao3 you might wanna do some soul searching.

So no I don’t care about your DNI list. No I don’t care that you only want virgos to reblog your post about Home Depot. No I don’t care that you can’t tell the difference between an anime character and a person, between real life and a plot point, between internet drama and an actual crime. I find that dude from Friends ugly af to that point I cringe but I’m not gonna go harass fandom accounts or look up every bad thing the characters done and accuse blogs of being bad people. I don’t like a lot of ATLA ships and think both Zutara and Kataang are morally gross af but I’m not gonna say the writers or the fans are sympathizing with pedophilia or abuse. Cuz that’s ridiculous.

When I publish works I’m gonna make it clear what kind of story it is. And then I’m gonna step back and tell the fucking story. I’m not gonna pop up every other chapter to warn people that a gay character calls another gay character a fag affectionately. Or a character in a toxic relationship *shocker* is having a bad time. I’m not gonna tell people that the horror work has gore and a jump scare. It’s horror.

Cuz I’m not gonna infantilize my audience and trust that they can set their own boundaries when it comes to stories they want to consume. No one is forcing them.

Media isn’t sex you don’t have to check in with every escalation. Entertainment isn’t your textbook, Phillip Schuyler is allowed to have no sons. A character isn’t your child they’re allowed to wear what they want and go on dangerous ass quests.

It’s frustrating being told to choose between assholes who project their own privilege onto others and assholes who project their own trauma onto others. Nuance exists.

Now block me dear lord, you’re doing the inventor of the block button a disservice when you get off on being pissed off

[sleeping-on-cracking-ice]

did i just bingeread everything you posted? absolutely. do i regret it. absolutely not. ✨you are an amazing writer!!!💕 And while we’re at it can i request a scenario where Niragi goes crazy and scares his s/o really bad but he gets kinda soft and tries to comfort them later? If that makes sense haha And also a giant thank you for writing in gender neutral!!🥺💕

Thank you so much for reading my fics! I’m honestly really flattered haha 😅 Here is you’re request!

Comfort From A Tormentor | Suguru Niragi

{Alice In Borderland Masterlist}

Character(s): Niragi (ft. OC)

Summary: Niragi tries to comfort you, his S/O, after you witnessed his murderous behaviour for the first time

Warnings: toxic relationship, blood, murder, graphic violence, pushy behaviour, reader watches someone being killed, going into shock, panic attack, quite intense trauma, slight abuse of power

Word Count: 2.4k

*reader is gender-neutral

You always knew that Niragi wasn’t the kindness at The Beach, which was quite blatantly obvious. When people heard you guys had gotten together and were now in an established relationship, you had many people express their concerns privately with you, labelling him as an evil and violent character. You always shook it off, because you’d seen nothing of the sort during the time you had spent with him.

The worst you ever saw him say or do was a threat, or a short punch to the ribs as a warning, but even then the victims usually deserved it. You hadn’t experienced one of Niragi’s ‘outbreaks’ that people have discussed with you about. You started to believe it was all rumours to keep you away from him until he lost it one night in front of you, causing you to believe everything you had been told about him.

It was a usual night at The Beach, people parading around the pool and filling their brains and sinuses with alcohol, allowing them to forget their shared hardships for the evening.

You sat in a small booth that was excluded from the rest of the crowd. Your head was leaning on Niragi’s broad shoulder as you watched everyone dance to the blaring music. You felt the bass vibrate through the ground and in your chest, making you excited from the fun atmosphere.

Niragi lifted his hand and pet your head softly. “You okay little mouse?” he checked, bringing his face closer to yours and placing his lips on your cheek. You turned your head towards him and brushed your lips on his. “Yeah, I’m just tired,” you whispered. Niragi smirked and rubbed his hand along your bare leg. “We can go to bed soon, let’s just stay a little longer.”

Niragi shifted underneath you and stood up, making you lean back against the cushioned backrest. “I’m going to get a drink,” he stated bluntly before picking up his rifle from the small table that sat in front of you. “Don’t let anyone touch you otherwise you’ll regret it.”

You felt uneasy at his threat, but you knew if you just listened to him he would never carry through his brutal promises. He wasn’t that hard of a personality to figure out.

You watched as he strolled away towards the bar, leaving you by yourself and cold in the booth. You moved your eyes from him and looked around to everyone else, watching a few people jump into the pool and laugh together. You wished Niragi had less of a important placing at The Beach so he could relax like everyone else instead of constantly having to deal with stupid drunken dickheads causing trouble.

You looked over towards the bar again to see if you could spot Niragi, but couldn’t see him from where you were sitting. You needed to go to the bathroom and you were wondering if you could make it before he returned. You shrugged your shoulders and stood up on your feet to leave. It wouldn’t be that long, and besides if he did some back to you not being there, you were sure he wouldn’t mind. It’s just the bathroom.

You quickly made your way past the few crowds of dancing bodies. The smell of sweat and alcohol filled your nostrils as you pushed through, making your face scrunch up in disgust. No matter how long you spend there, you would never grow used to the party smell.

You made your way to the lobby to get to the bathroom located there. It was a quiet walk and hardly anyone was in the halls. It made you more calm, knowing that no one was around to bring you a hard time.

But unfortunately, you thought too soon. As you arrived at the lobby and were crossing the main lounge area, a young man with jet black hair and blue board shorts stood up from one of the couches. You failed to notice him earlier due to him being hidden behind the backrest.

“Oh hey!” he exclaimed your way excitedly. “I thought you’d come here. I saw you drink a rather large cocktail earlier so I just guessed you’d show up some time soon or later.”

You froze in shock, looking the man up and down with confusion written on your face. “What?”

He shook his head as he slowly made his way over to your frame. “Forget it. I wanted to get you away from your psychotic side piece so I could get a chance with you without being killed.” His smile was a bit too creepy for your liking, bringing an unpleasant tingling feeling up your back.

You stepped back as he attempted to reach out and grab your hand. He slowly recoiled with a frown on his tanned face. You shook your head and hands, denying his movements towards you. “No thanks actually. I’m not interested,” you insisted, turning your back to try and escape into the bathroom.

You felt your heart drop from the sudden grip on your wrist, pulling you back towards the annoying man and into his chest. He lifted your chin so you were looking at him and crashed his lips onto yours.

You panicked, ripping your arm out of his grip and pushing him away from you. He stumbled back a bit before smirking at your angered expression.

“What the fuck was that?!” you screamed at him, wiping his saliva off of your mouth in disgust. “Did no one ever teach you what no means?!”

Before the man could respond, a piercing sound of gunshots rang through the room. You covered your ears and dropped to the ground in fear of being hit. You looked towards the man and saw him crouching as well with a few bullet marks scattering the carpet around him. They barely missed him.

You kept your head down low in case of another load being shot at any moment, but you were grabbed by your upper arm and pulled up roughly after a few short moments. Niragi stood there, angered expression on his face and tightening his grip on your arm. You felt your blood pumping with adrenaline from his movements.

“What the fuck did I tell you?” he hissed into your face, being way too quiet for your liking.

You didn’t know what to say. Your words were trapped in your throat, being held there by the shock of the gunshots and Niragi’s anger towards you.

“I told you to not let anyone touch you. And how hard is it to stay in one place for five minutes?!” His fist moved from your arm to your jaw, holding it tightly so you would face him. Tears were developing in your eyes. You tried to stop them from rolling down your cheeks in fear of angering Niragi more, but the pain throbbing in your jaw made it nothing but more difficult. This wasn’t the Niragi you knew. He’s never laid a violent hand on you before.

“Niragi, stop,” you whimpered out, holding onto his wrist that was hurting you. “It hurts.”

“I don’t care. You deserve to be hurt after not listening to me.” Niragi finally released his grip from your jaw. You dropped to the ground, clutching your face in pain and letting out quiet sobs. The look in his eyes was menacing, making him seem unpredictable. You were terrified, pushing your legs against the carpet to separate yourself from his tall frame.

You watched as he turned away from you and walked towards the young man, who scrambled to his feet to try and run away. But Niragi leaped towards him and grabbed his shoulder before he could do so. He pulled him back harshly onto the ground and placed a boot on his chest, keeping him there. The man struggled until Niragi held the barrel of his gun against his forehead, making the petrified man freeze underneath him.

You watched in horror as he leaned down and pressed harder and harder on his bare chest, making the defenseless man cry out in fear of breaking a rib. “You’ve made a huge mistake my friend,” he growled, sticking his tongue out and showing off his piercing. “You dare touch what’s mine, you suffer the consequences.”

You leant up against the concrete wall, feeling too weak and in shock to stand up. You cried and screamed as you watched Niragi stamp his foot incredibly harshly on the man’s head several times. Blood poured down the side of his face and he put his hands up in defense, which deemed useless against Niragi’s strength. Niragi didn’t stop, moving his aim from the man’s face to his chest, hands, stomach, groin and thighs. His screams of pain and suffering echoed around the room, ringing in your ears and making your heart ache. Yes, he did attempt to force himself onto you, but hearing another human screeching out for help when you could do nothing was one of the most painful things you could ever inflict on an empath such as yourself.

You shook violently and covered your eyes with your hands, not wanting to see anymore. You wanted to disappear, to evaporate into the wind. You wanted to wake up back at home, in your safe warm bed from before the Borderland. You felt sick from the contrasting differences between the world in your head and the one you were physically in. Why couldn’t you just fade away?

You felt a presence in front of your shivering form, and you slowly peeled away your hands to reveal the abuser in front of you, looking into your eyes worryingly. Your stomach dropped from catching a glimpse of the blood splattered lightly across his attractive features. You felt nausea building in your stomach, making you want to throw up.

“Baby? What’s wrong?” Niragi lifted a hand and tried to place it on your cheek, but you flinched away violently and screamed as you crawled onto your hands and knees, attempting to quickly escape him. It was deemed almost impossible to do considering the emotional state you were in at that moment. You just watched your lover beat a man until the light left his eyes, you weren’t going to recover from the shock quickly.

You cried as he grabbed your ankle and roughly pulled you back. You struggled against his grip and tried to shake his hands off of your shoulders and waist desperately. You were terrified that he was going to hurt you, beat you until you were dead just like his other victim.

“Baby! Why are you so scared?! Hold still!” Niragi cried, attempting to hold your thrashing body against his to quiet you down. He was feeling desperate and helpless, what was happening to you? You’ve never done this before. He thought maybe you were in shock and thinking that he was the man trying to force himself on you.

“Y/N! It’s me! I’m here, you’re okay!” he cried in a frightened tone. He managed to pull you roughly by your waist into his lap and held the back of your head against his chest area. He began to shake himself, being so worried about your emotional state. He felt you suddenly stop struggling in his arms, hearing your soft sobs of fear against his shirt.

“What’s going on baby? You’re scaring me,” he groaned into your neck. You shivered against him, feeling too weak to even push yourself from his chest. You could do nothing but sit in his lap, terrified of the man who was attempting to comfort you.

“It’s okay. He’s gone now. He can’t hurt you anymore,” he cooed, stroking your hair in an attempt to calm your rapid breathing. He let out a shaky breath, being on the verge of tears. He felt his heart rapidly pumping in his chest, thumping against his ribcage. He was at least comforted at the fact that you were back in his arms, away from everyone and everything that wanted to separate you from him.

He leaned his head back and looked at your face tucked into his chest. He saw your tight hands scrunching his black and white button-up into themselves, making him feel soft at how vulnerable and small you looked.

“It’s okay baby. I’ve got you. I’ll always protect you.”

You tried to level your breathing, listening to Niragi’s heartbeat to focus on something else other than the fact that he had just murdered someone in front of you.

Everything everyone had said was true. Niragi was purely an evil person, filled to the brim with violence and murderous impulses. You repented your doubts so badly, wishing that you had listened. But you chose to give him a chance to be a good person for once in his life, and he threw it out the window. Only now, you couldn’t escape him. You had to now live with being the object of a murderer’s desires.

You felt Niragi snake his arms underneath your knees and shoulders gently, standing up from the ground with you in his arms. You clutched onto him from around his neck, tears still slowly travelling down your face.

“Let’s get you to bed, hmm? My little baby must be so tired after all that.”

‘After all that’. He said it like it was nothing more than a bad day. Your boyfriend just killed someone in front of you and then just forced you back into his arms. This wasn’t a bad day, it was a traumatic experience that would stay with you for the rest of your life, remembering every detail and image of the event vividly.

“Niragi,” you mumbled. He glanced down to your weak frame, face going soft from the tired expression across your features. “Shh, don’t speak. Just go to sleep. I promise I’ll be here when you wake up.” He leaned down and placed a tender kiss to the top of your head.

You didn’t want him to be there when you woke. In fact, you didn’t want to wake up at all. You felt miserable and defenseless in his arms, wishing for nothing more than to wake up and for it to be all some horrific dream.

But you didn’t wake up, because it was your reality. Niragi’s delusional, obsessive and abusive mindset was nothing new anymore, it was normal everyday life for you from then on.

[bastardfucker]

In case no one’s told you yet today: your writing is an absolute gift. Your characterization is phenomenal—if someone told me you’d been plucked out of the boys’ writers’ room, id be like “yeah that tracks” because of how realistic ur dialogue & inner monologues are. It’s embarrassing how many times ive read thru critical darlings too 😵‍💫 like i just love ur work!! Have a fab day

I want to print this out and hang it on my wall 🥺💖

This means a lot to me, especially since Critical Darling is my favorite Fic that’s I’ve written. I do Intend to continue it some day (I mean it was at least a year between Chapters 4 and 5), but all of my fics are currently on hiatus due to the fact that I picked up a job as a professional Ghostwriter.

The company I work for has me writing 4k words a day for three weeks at a time, which between that and being a parent doesn’t leave me with a whole lot of free time.

That said, in what free time I DO have I’m working on my own original Horror-Romance Novella series. I figure that since I have a full-time career as a writer now, I should have something I can actually publish under my own name (since none of my ghostwriting work can go in my portfolio due to the NDAs I had to sign)

It means a lot to me that you feel I capture the characters well; the Homelander character in particular is a fascinating character to work with. Toxic devotion is one of my favorite tropes to write in, and his very specific traumas make for a lot of interesting things to unpack (I have chapters 6, 7, and part of 8 thought out, but I won’t have the time to actually work on them until I get at least one of my original works published-which will be a while since work keeps me pretty busy)

Putting a readmore here because I accidentally made this a long post and I don’t want to clutter anyone’s dashes 😅

Critical Darling started out as a “Fix it Fic” in the sense of “Okay but, what if someone actually CARED about Homelander? What would happen?” But the thing about Homelander is even when he’s doing his best and he has a support system, he’s going to put a LOT of pressure on that person. I intend to explore a little bit more of his possessiveness in chapter 6, since Darcy really hasn’t tripped on any of his jealousy buttons so far(since she herself has no other friends), I also want to give her the chance to be a prick to some other characters in a way that’ll highlight the weird over-protective codependency she’s headed toward with him. I also intend for her to meet Hughie, and without him knowing who she is, get some of her reservations about Homelander off of her chest(her desire for a real relationship but inability to touch him-which she phrases like a psychological issue with touch rather than outing her power). Unfortunately, she’ll also meet Butcher, and that will confirm her as an Enemy to The Boys(more than just being “Mrs. Cunt”). Her altercation with Butcher will actually end up making the codependency WORSE, because it reenforces her trauma around being a supe and the idea that she was raised with that she should be punished for it, and she clings to Homelander, because he makes her feel safe being who she is. This of course, gives him such a big ego. (He had been mad that she went off in the middle of the night without him; he of course, didn’t really have the right to be mad that she went out for a walk, but having her cling to him for safety after a traumatic event really makes him feel more confident that he’s right about his possessiveness)

I just want to enforce that just because Darcy’s genuine compassion for him IS helping him, that love isn’t a magic cure-all pill for the very deep rooted issues he has; ESPECIALLY when she has a lot of unresolved issues of her own. Both Homelander and Darcy are making progress on their respective issues (he is learning that he doesn’t have to be Perfect to be loved, and he’s allowed to hurt from what has been done to him; she is growing to be less passive, her tendencies to stand up for HIM helping her better understand that she needs to hold boundaries for herself), but they will definitely both stumble sometimes.

Chapter 7 will involve him meeting her family (Grandparents and Brother) within the context of their fake relationship, and it will definitely mean a lot to him when they essentially welcome him to the family with open arms (and make him that much more desperate for his relationship with Darcy to be more than a Media Cover). It will have a lot of cute fluff with Darcy’s kid brother being a huge Homelander fan, but it will also explore a lot of angst within the context of his inner monologuing regarding the way Darcy’s Grandparents seem to genuinely want to treat him like a person, and it will be very hard for him not to cry when he sees the opportunity to have a real family, if he can make things real with Darcy. Of course, being around the family will also expose some of her traumas around her parents/stepfather that she hasn’t really disclosed to him, and that will go a long ways toward helping him understand who she really is. (Being welcomed into Darcy’s family will also steer him away from the whole supe supremacy thing, since now he has a human family who cares about him. It will also put him in a much better place emotionally when he finally meets Ryan; especially with Darcy there to provide emotional support and to actually take Becca’s feelings into account)

Oops I really didn’t mean to go on a whole big speech about what’s next for Critical Darling 😅; I just really really love the fic so I get a little overzealous whenever I get the chance to talk about it.

In any case, thank you so much for the kind words!! It was actually the amount of support I’ve gotten for Critical Darling that pushed me to actually try for the professional work I have now, so it really does mean everything to me. Writing professionally has literally changed my life for the better.

[thechangeling]

I was reading your co-signing the narrative post- great post btw- and your thoughts on Kit Lightwood helped me figure out exactly what bothers me about the way other characters talk about and treat him.

So, there’s this kind of this running “joke” in TLH that Christopher’s interests are boring, that everyone else puts up with it him as though it’s this big nuisance, that everyone zones out hearing him talk… and on and on and on.*** And then there’s this scene where Grace is genuinely interested or at least not bringing him down about his self-expression and the things that bring him joy, and that’s romanticized as special when it’s really kind of the bare fuckin minimum. Like, I’m not saying James/Matthew/Thomas had to immerse themselves completely in every sciency detail but the constant “jokes” implying that Christopher’s work is boring or incomprehensible or not worth their time is just so tiring. There’s always an undercurrent of “Christopher’s just playing around uselessly” (which is not true and even when he’s having fun with his work then it’s still automatically WORTHY and VALUABLE because it makes him happy!) Not to mention this recurring problem directly contradicts the value that Christopher’s work has (beyond its inherent value) when he sends it into the world to literally save lives: the poison antidote, the fire messages that will probably come about in CoT.

And the thing is, the merry thieves’ disinterest is directly meant to foil grace’s interest in order to lend the Grace/Kit relationship a certain significance, as CC assigns to it. I’m not saying shared excitement over an interest/hobby/career/field/etc isn’t sweet platonically or romantically. I just really dislike how the idea CC is using is “no one else can bear to tolerate Kit’s ‘quirks’ but Grace, and that is Endearing, and so they are Soulmates (TM)” rather than the much healthier and positive idea that “Kit does cool sciencey stuff which his family and friends generally don’t share as strong a passion for but still don’t huff about it like it’s somehow a chore or a burden on them, and then Grace comes along and she does happen to share a similar passion and that’s the beginning of their ties to one another.” That second reasoning is what could make their friendship really refreshing; we don’t need ableism poorly twined into romance to enjoy that relationship.

I haven’t read TDA in a while but I’m thinking we could also find touches of this with Ty partly because so much of when we see him is from Kit’s POV? Not that Kit means harm or thinks himself heroic but CC on the other hand is a repeat offender in “abled/white/straight/cis character is ultimately and completely responsible for the salvation of disabled/POC/queer character in this aspect.” And I’m kind of half dreading the wicked powers for that reason among others …

I apologize if all this seems obvious or rambly. I do sometimes have trouble articulating things exactly but when I read your post i had a lightbulb moment and I wanted to note it down.

Have a great day!

***Side Note: this is why I really enjoy fan-created content that explores Christopher’s relationships with people (even people he didn’t interact with on-page in the canon) without that annoying and problematic aspect built into the framework of the relationship.

^^^^^^^^^THIS ALL OF THIS!!!!!!

Full disclosure this is gonna be kind of long sorry. But you have stumbled across my favourite topic to rant about. Allistic saviorism. Basically the name is pretty self explanatory. It's when an allistic person fictional or otherwise has the desire to or actively attempts to essentially "save" the autistic person from the horrors of the world or their life, or even themselves because they think that the autistic person isn't strong or capable enough to fix/handle it on their own. All of this is usually done for very self serving reasons. Part of this is also allistic people being praised as heroes for being nice to autistic people or asking them out, or loving them.

I don't neccesarily think that kitty is an allistic savior ship on it's own. I think that there are definitely peices of those beliefs scattered throughout the books and it might get worse in TWP. That's honestly something that I'm worried about too tbh. But honestly I think that the fandom made it a billion times worse.

This mainly allistic fandom wanted to romanticize the idea of Kit taking care of Ty and shouldering the burden of his "unpredictability." Kit is the only one who can get through to Ty. The only one who understands the mystery that is Ty 🙄. Some of this is canon too. For example, Ty can look Kit in the eye, he lets him touch him. He doesn't wear the headphones when Kit's around right? And Kit was able to calm him down during his meltdown.

And while some of this is really cute from a romantic perspective, it's also kinda problematic because it reeks of allistic saviorism. It promotes the idea that Kit is like Ty's "cure." And that's just impossible.

And honestly I know I've contributed to this in some ways. Because if I'm being perfectly honest with you, there's a part of me that enjoys that. The romantization of autism.

The idea of being taken care of.

The idea that someone could love an autistic person and see them as "beautiful" and "extraordinary" and all the things Kit calls Ty, was incredibly moving and appealing to me as a kid. It still is. Because I grew up on stories of charity cases and allistic saviorism making headlines with prom dates. I was super secretive about it, but I was always a romantic growing up. But I thought that it was impossible for me to have a real love story because people like me don't get that. (Not to get all sob story on you sorry. I overshare. It's an autistic thing.)

And there are some really compelling things about kitty that really do work. And I'm not trying to suggest that Kit learning to help Ty with the ...shall we say more colourful traits of his disability is a bad thing always. It's not. But I think the issue is with Ty's lack of pov and Ty's lack of a narrative in the books. It makes him seem like less of a completely developed character and more like, "Kit's" you know?

And because we don't have Ty's pov we don't really get what makes Kit have this sort of calming effect on him or why it's different. And more importantly we don't get why Ty's letting him in, we only get Kit pushing past his boundries. The entire thing becomes about Kit essentially and that's at the root of all allistic saviorism.

Also like you mentioned before, Kit is seen as special to a certain extent because he can handle Ty. That's not neccesarily something the character believes obviously, but again with CC co-signing the damn narrative with the way she makes the impact Kit has on Ty such a big deal in everyone's eyes and in QOAAD she really emphasizes the drain Ty's necromancy plan is taking on Kit, suddenly Ty's grief becomes all about Kit and with no pov from Ty, it's more allistic savior bs.

Honestly most of this isnt actually THAT bad it's just when you throw it all together and look at the ugly history and let's be honest present, of autistic people being silenced and spoken over by our caregivers and loved ones and we are treated like burdens on them, and how those people are praised for loving us, it kinda looks bad. But the fandom definitely made it worse.

I always get criticized for criticizing kitty by allistic people with, " well if you think they're so toxic then why do you even ship them?" Which is a piss poor take lacking in any nuance. An autistic person has the right to critique a dynamic involving an autistic character. More to the point, you can love something and be critical of it. I swear when this fandom finally figures that one out... we could accomplish so much.

I'm really hoping this is making sense it's like 2 in the morning. As for Grace and Christopher's dynamic I agree with you. I basically have nothing to add. Bare minimum. Should not be idolized. The way the others treat him should not just be brushed off as no big deal. It's ableism.

Basically it's just a bunch of classic mistakes that come from a neurotypical abled writer writing nd characters. Some mistakes are more damning then others. But it does make me scared for TWP.

I can only hope.

[k-s-morgan]

I have a question.

Is there a difference for you in terms of properly representing a selective group of people, whether that be race, ethnicity, identity and sexuality V.S. Survivors are of trauma, assault, psychological damage, mental illness and otherwise?

I know that you don’t mind people who romanticize dark events like rape, Stockholm syndrome or like incest (I’m not sure about that last one)Like do you not mind when people romanize rape or racism?

For me personally. I don’t mind people writing about dark elements of society. That is because it brings awareness to these serious issues in our society. I’m not so sure though about painting them in rose colored lenses or portraying it as something that is good. (Unless it usually from the victim’s warped perception)

I think a lot of things are interesting. Like your own stories. To me they don’t give out a message. Like yes this is an amazing relationship go do the same thing or this is something you should look for in a relationship/person! But some of the stories that are darker and portray like pedophilia and rape make it seem like ‘oh they really wanted it’ or ‘it’s okay, it’s not that bad’

I think those are dangerous messages to give out. Whether to children or adults. Because there is a thing like when you start off by put off by it, but the more you read things like that the more accustom to it and it becomes not as bad as a thing. Ya know.

That’s how like a lot of serial killers, rapists and other people start on the path to do those horrible things. It’s because they become accustomed to the message that it’s alright to do what they want.

Sorry for the long ask. But just wanted to ask your opinion on the matter because I see both sides of the argument and I want to find a middle ground. Ya know.

Hello! This will get a bit long, but I’d like to start with asking everyone: please don’t send me asks about the morality of fiction. While I can write essays on it, it’s not the topic that interests me and I don’t want to spend my time on it, no matter how genuine and respectful you are. I’m going to say everything I think about this subject in this reply, and that’s it.

Anon: I indeed don't mind romanization of such things as rape, age difference, incest, violence, and so on in fiction. These kinds of stories exist for adults only, and it's expected that adults can tell the right from wrong without having everything spelled out for them. In an ideal world, children shouldn't have access to fiction like this, but they are curious and easily bypass restrictions. In this case, the responsibility is on them and/or their parents. When I was about 11, I discovered the world of fanfiction. There were no tags then, and I readily clicked on "I'm 18" warnings to read the content I wanted. Some of it affected me badly - I still vividly remember the story where my favorite character was graphically raped, and it left me terrified and upset. With time, I learned how to recognize and filter such content, and it's especially easy now, when tagging has become commonplace.

There are indeed stories that portray very problematic things in a fluffy and positive way, though I'd say they are a minority. I read *a lot* of stuff and I probably saw just a few of them over my whole life. Even then, though, it is expected that adults read such content. And adults, along with most teenagers, won't decide that if one or even ten stories showed a fucked up relationship very positively, then it must be a good thing in real life. People are surrounded by parents, relatives, friends and their families, classmates, folks on the streets: this influence is far more profound than a story they might have read.  

Fiction can reflect the society, but it doesn't direct it. Every day, we see the normalization of smoking, drinking, toxic masculinity, heteronormativity, and racism in movies, TV shows, cartoons, etc. But they are there because the society is like this. These things existed long before fiction as we know it started developing. At the same time, murders aren't normalized in the society at all no matter how many action, thriller, and horror movies we all see. And murders are shown much more often than incest, minor/adults, and abuse portrayed in positive light. So if nothing happened with the former, nothing will definitely happen with the latter. 

Fiction can indeed have a small positive impact by normalizing things like equality. For example, it's natural for random female characters to kiss a male character. It's present even in 'Hannibal', where Chiyoh kisses Will and Bedelia kisses Hannibal out of blue, with nothing to really justify it. But it's almost unheard of male characters to do the same: if they do kiss other male characters randomly, it's usually within the "ewww, gross!" joking context. If things were to change, as they are slowly doing, if characters were allowed to interact equally regardless of their gender, then it could make an impact on the society. But fiction alone could never be responsible for it: same-sex marriages are being legalized. Punishments for homophobia start being enhanced. There are changes happening in the real world, and fiction is just a nice addition that helps solidify them.

There should be more diversity and more representation in fiction because it could aid in the positive practices that are already happening. But no matter how many stories feature romantization of violence, it's not and won't be accepted in the society because people have a general understanding of what is right and what is wrong.

There is also a big difference between fandom content and mainstream content. Someone's fanfic about romantic rape won't re-write the morals of a person. It's a work published for free and you can never guess what motivated the writer to create it. Mainstream fiction, on the other hand, is expected to show a little more care because millions are being poured into it and it has a far wider reach. POC and LGBTQ people already suffer from discrimination. If fiction further contributes to it, it's bad. If it chooses to contribute to the positive changes that take place, it's great. But everything still and always goes back to the real world.  

Finally, serial killers don't become killers because they saw a message about it being okay in fiction. They were already fucked up and considering it, and they just wanted to find a justification. What you see in real life has a far bigger influence than anything you experience in fiction, and the numbers don't change. It's been decades from the moment violence started being glamourized, and the majority of population don't think it's okay to beat someone up. 80% of women have rape fantasies, but most people don't think they actually want to be raped. The same principle applies to every type of fiction out there. People with unstable minds, people who cannot differentiate between the real and the made-up, people who are easily triggered by dark material should not be consuming fiction of this type. If they do, the fault for that doesn’t fall on the shoulders of the creator, just like it cannot fall on producer of peanut cookies if a person with peanut allergy decided to eat them. 

[lucifers-horror-harem]

Kind of in a weird headspace today regarding my writing. Nothing bad or anything involving my writing on this blog, don't worry about that. In all honesty to anyone who is reading this and who reads my fics and sends me asks you're a blessing. You helped me feel better about my writing again. Read more cause it gets long and rambling and I just need to get this off my chest.

I wrote a long fic on my main blog that people who have followed me from that blog will remember. I feel massive guilt over this long fic because it probably will never be finished because of a combination of not being as interested in the fandom/series anymore as well as the comments I got that were always kind of for lack of a better term, "backhanded." Like, telling me how much they loved this fic but also either telling me they didn't like something I was doing with it and how THEY would do it, or telling me they hoped the character and the oc would live happily ever after even though not only was the character a villain, but I made it pretty clear in my fic that the relationship was pretty toxic considering the oc was kidnapped against her will and there was some Stockholm syndrome going on. To this day I get incredibly anxious every time I get an email from AO3 telling me someone commented on the fic because I don't know of it will be a genuine nice comment or a negging one or even a combo of the both. For a long time and even currently it still makes me upset and anxious that I wrote a fic that I worked so damn hard to make sure couldn't be misinterpreted as being anything but a darker fic but it still gets to me sometimes. As someone who has a shit time speaking and socializing irl the thing I rely on the most is my writing. It's how I KNOW I can make my thoughts get across. So when people just wildly misinterpreted the theme of my fic it made me so upset and worried that I was the problem and that I wasn't being clear enough.

I dont talk about this fic simply because I don't want to seem ungrateful. The people I met through this fic that were genuinely supportive, even drawing FAN ART of my OCS (that might i include at least one person outright told me they hated those same OCs people loved because they got in the way of the main pairing even though I made it clear it was a harem/the ocs were never mean or rude to the main character or engaged in any catty behavior), i can never thank the people that loved my work enough. I always feel horrible that if I were to say the reasons why I wanted to step away from the fic it would feel like I was punishing the people that did enjoy it. I could cope with general hate as the character I wrote for got PLENTY of it from the main fandom and I couldn't care about that. But I had a worse time coping with people who told me they liked the fic but not certain aspects of it. I had way more comments of "when is the next chapter" as soon as I posted a fic than people telling me how much they enjoyed it, what their fave moments were, or even hopefully talking about scenes that I was happy and excited about and worked really fucking hard to craft the interpersonal relationships between characters.

Part of the reason I created this blog was to keep my slasher content focused on one place. Another reason was I wanted to escape some of the inevitable "so you dropped this fic huh" (which yes I've gotten a ton of those too). But I'm ultimately glad I created this blog, that I've been a part of the slasher/horror fandom, and that I've met so many good friends here. Genuinely and completely, I thank every one of you. I have had many ruts as a writer, and following that long fic was one of them. I never thought I would get out of that rut till I came to be a part of this fandom. I'm still genuinely shocked that people enjoy my work to the degree they do. That they're willing to scream with me about stinky slashers and thirst over them with me without judgment.

I really want to write another long fic someday. I have a ton of ideas that I'm afraid to commit to just because due to that last long fic I worry if I don't have everything outlined to the most extreme degree that I either a) won't finish or b) people won't like it. I know I will probably get over it but yeah, idk its a thing that makes me so anxious especially as someone who wants to publish original novels at some point when I can get my shit together.

Either way, I know I will probs be fine on this blog. Everyone has been so kind and supportive, and I really appreciate being in a fandom that FINALLY feels accepting and welcoming and doesn't have cliques or cattiness or anything of that sort. It makes me so fucking happy.

[dramionediscussion]

How can people be so affected by opinions on fiction? If you read an amazing book, you think "wow, this is a great book" and then you move on with your life, maybe it changed you, maybe it didn't.

But no matter how much you like it, or how much it changed you, it's not going to make the plot or the characters real. And I think that's what this fandom seems to forget--that these characters don't exist in real life. Which means we don't need or require their permission to pair them with someone other than the one in canon.

You think this relationship is toxic and don't ship it? Cool, no one asked you to. Ship whatever you want. But the LEAST you can do is leave the shippers alone.

It's a simple concept, really: Don't like horror? Don't read Stephen King. But you can't tell people not to read his books, and you can't tell Stephen King himself to stop writing books because you think they're too violent or gory or scary. Don't like dramione? Don't interact with it. Don't look at fanart, don't read drabbles or fics, don't watch video edits. But don't discourage artists and writers by leaving negative comments on their work because you don't agree with it.

And if your argument is something like "I will because you guys are shipping a racist bully with his victim": By all means, if this happened in real life, if someone was being racist to another person, go off on them. I have no issue. But this. is. fiction.

You cannot tell people what to ship or what not to ship in fiction. You cannot tell them which characters to like and dislike. Because, again: this is fiction, and literature thrives on different opinions about it. If everyone had the same mindset about, say, Lolita, then reading it would be utterly pointless because you can just look at other people's reviews and then agree with them. There wouldn't be debates or theories or opinions about the book.

The entire point of reading fiction is so that you form your own opinions about it, not tear down someone else's or just mindlessly agree with everyone else's. Don't be so personally offended if someone doesn't agree with you.

Besides, there are much, much worse things in the world than a group of people shipping a fictional couple.

Very well said!!

And the thing is, most dramione fics have Draco apologizing, have him making amends, being good, giving back. So like he not the same as he was before. He is not bullying Hermione in those fics, he is not using insults.

Also, in canon Hermione didn't care about his taunts. So it didn't affect her the way those antis say.

And you gave an excellent example in Stephen King. He writes some messed up things (IT for example) but we acknowledge that it is fiction and we don't judge someone who read that book or likes them. Why can't these antis do the same?

I honestly feel like these antis are really young. Gen Z perhaps. They can't be from the Harry Potter generation like most of us in the fandom. These younger kids are very "woke" and shit upon anything they don't agree with.

- Lisa

[ordinaryschmuck]

Why I (Want To) Love Amphibia

Salutations random people on the internet who probably won't read this. I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons. If you've been paying attention to my posts, you would have known that I made a top twenty list of the best-animated series of the 2010s. And if you read my Honorable Mentions list, you would have known that I consider Amphibia one of those shows that, while I like it, I wouldn't go so far as to say that it's one of the best. Don't get me wrong. It's good. But there are issues that I have with Amphibia, and I can't recommend it without being hesitant. I still like it fine, but I doubt some people will be as forgiving as me. So I'm going to explain the quality and faults that the show has, while still being considerate to those who do love it. Because unlike some people who would make a two-hour-long video essay about how much they hate something, I can at least acknowledge that while something doesn't entirely work for me, that doesn't mean it won't work for everyone else. Because there is a reason why this show has such a following...I don't think it's earned, but I won't knock people down when they love something I find passable. And I hope that respect goes both ways as I explain why I (want to) love Amphibia.

Also, this review is going to contain spoilers for the entire series. So if you haven't checked it out yet, I recommend you do it to form your own opinion. Season one is on Disney+, and you're on your own for season two. And I suggest you find a legal way to watch it if you can, because I'm not going to leave a link to a pirating website filled with every animated series and movie you can find. And I'm definitely not going to insert that link into a random letter in this review with the thought that if you have to pirate something, then you might as well work for it. Because that would be crazy.

...

Stop being crazy.

....

Anywho, let's start with:

WHAT I LIKE

The Comedy: Let it be known that this show is funny. Like, really funny. I wouldn't go so far as to say that it's funnier than Gravity Falls, which got me chuckling with every episode, but Amphibia definitely hits more than it misses. There are occasions when the jokes aren't really character-oriented and could be said by anybody in the Plantar Family, but if they're still funny, then who am I to complain. Although there is one issue that I have with the comedy. But I'll save that for when I talk about what I don't like. For now, I can assure you that if you're hoping for some laughs, Amphibia has plenty to offer.

Warnings Against Toxic Relationships: But even the best comedies know when to offer some substance. Because I won't lie, when Anne described what is clearly a toxic friendship in the second episode, I was hooked. I love it when kids shows breach topics that can be important for children down the line. And for the most part, I think Amphibia does it well. There are so many instances that the writers' point out the several red flags that a person should avoid when it comes to a friendship and when it's time to either cut that person from your life and stand up for yourself. One of my favorite episodes is "Prison Break," where Sasha explains how she manipulates people and shows zero remorse for it. Then there's the episode "The Sleepover to End All Sleepovers" that shows how a person's influence can affect others and how much it changes perception as Anne and Marcy still believe they need someone like Sasha in their lives...At least I hope that's what the intention is. Because if the writers are trying to say that Anne and Marcy really need someone like Sasha...Well, I'll save that for my dislikes. Because even though it could use a little polishing, warning kids about toxic relationships is what keeps me hooked into seeing what happens next in this series.

It’s Not Afraid to go Dark: On top of breaking borders with morals intended for kids, I just gotta respect a show for playing around with what's considered "too dark." Especially if that show is on the Disney Channel!

The writers are not afraid to imply that death happens in the world of Amphibia, primarily because it is like a swamp ecosystem filled with predators and food chains. And I feel like because the characters are mostly amphibians, the writers can get away with an entire cave filled with the bones of victims as long as they're not humans. But frogs? No one gives a crap about them. There's a reason they're the ones who get dissected in schools.

Plus, a good majority of the monsters that Anne and the Plantars face are pretty horrifying at times. The crew who work on the show do a great job balancing the line of making these creatures look scary, but never go too far that they'll scar kids for life. Except in the Halloween special...How the f**k did they get away with the monsters in the Halloween special? And while they don't ever show what these monsters do, the implications honestly make things much worse, which again, I kind of respect. It's good to have shows like Amphibia that can scare kids a little bit. Getting through something fictitiously dark helps make kids feel braver and prepare them for the real horrors in the world. Especially since most of these creatures are just exaggerated versions of real-life predators...google them.

The Season One Finale: It was "Reunion" that made me realize that Amphibia has the potential to be amazing...it's also the last episode of season one, so let that sink in.

Joking aside, I honestly do love this episode. It's funny, it brings in elements from other episodes, nearly everybody does something useful, and it all ends with a satisfying and equally gut-wrenching climax. A climax, by the way, that is so perfect that I'm going to do a scene breakdown for why it's so good...so, you know, add that to the to-do list (I have so much s**t to make -_-). "Reunion" has so many elements about what makes a season finale so good that I feel like future writers should take notes for their own series that they plan to make. While I wish every episode of Amphibia had this level of quality, the writers know that the last impression is one of the most important. Because I will defend this show if this is the episode people use to trash it.

Marcy: I will also defend this show if someone trashes Marcy. Trust me, the best way to tell that someone is just hating on Amphibia for little to no reason is if they utter the word, "Marcy is a bad character." That is not true. Marcy is a great character, and I'd go so far as to say she's the best character in the series. She's sweet, adorable, and has a story ten times more interesting than Anne's. Anne learns what a sincere relationship is like through the Plantars, where Marcy falls victim to another manipulative relationship through King Andreas. It's her co-dependency that has the chance to get fleshed out more, and I can't wait to see if she has a moment to break out and form her own path.

Also, in the mass expanse of the multiverse, there exists a world where Amphibia is about the adventures that Marcy had in Newtopia as she uses Dungeons and Dragons logic to get by. And I want to see that universe! Because this clumsy nerd is already a blast to watch with the briefest of cameos. Imagine how much fun she would be if she had her own series!

Sprig: I don't know how much love Sprig gets within the fandom, but I got a feeling that it's not enough. He's funny without being annoying (most of the time), there's a whole lot of heart and sincerity to his actions, and above all else, he's the best friend that Anne needed. When Anne explained her very flawed views about friendship in "Best Fronds," it is clear how essential someone like Sprig is as he teaches Anne what friendship really means. It means caring for each other, supporting each other, making equal sacrifices for one another, and just being on the same page as each other. It is genuinely sweet seeing their friendship bloom, and I honestly hope the Amphibia fandom gives Sprig the amount of appreciation he deserves. Sure, he can be annoying sometimes, but for the most part, he's easily up there as one of my favorite characters.

Wally: Same with Wally! Who would have guessed that a character who appears as an dumb source of comic relief has a level of depth and lovability to him? "Wally and Anne" shows that while he is a nonsensical goofball, he doesn't really care what the frogs of Wartwood think of him. What matters is what he thinks of him. And that is just an incredible lesson to teach kids that just makes me love Wally more. 

(It also helps that he's probably the funniest character in the show. I know I said that he's dumb, but when he works, he works.)

Kermit the Frog Cameo: ...It's Kermit the Frog, y'all. I physically can't hate him. Especially since this is the perfect show for him to make a cameo in!

WHAT I DON’T LIKE

Anne’s Character: I don't have a problem with Anne. I think she's a serviceable protagonist, and I love the fact that she's Thai, offering a form of Asian representation other than Chinese, Japanese, or Korean. But here's the problem with Anne: After a season and a half, I still don't know what her character is. If you were to ask me to describe a Disney show protagonist within one sentence, I could do it effortlessly. Watch:

Star Butterfly: An adrenaline junky of a warrior princess who slowly learns to be responsible with each passing season.

Luz Noceda: A generous nerd that obsesses about fantasy and fiction, who still understands when to take a step in reality when the moment calls for it.

Scrooge McDuck: An old Scottish miser who has the heart of adventure and is a duck that almost loves his family as he loves his money.

For Anne, I don't know where to start because her personality is so inconsistent. Sometimes she makes friends with others without even trying, and other times, she gets on others' nerves easily. Sometimes she's a thrillseeker with the heart of adventure, and other times, she's a person who prefers to hang back and avoid doing work. And sometimes she's the only sane character with logical advice, and other times she's the most insane character who needs advice. Now, you could argue that these are all character traits that make Anne multidimensional. But if you ask me, it seems like her personality is dependent on what the writers want her to be for the episode. Someone like Luz going back and forth between two traits only works if there is a dominant personality trait that takes over the other. If Luz spends an entire episode being angry and serious, it proves that there's more to her than just a character that's nerdy and optimistic. But it's clear she is still that lovable nerd by having her say a corny line like, "Talk to the glyphs, Witch!" But because Anne has so many personality traits, it's hard to tell which is the norm and what is out of character. Case in point: Having Anne obsess over hang-gliding in one episode and doing a puzzle in the next is off as neither correlates with each other. Nor do they tell me who Anne is, other than the fact that she's clearly a character lacking a singular identity. And seeing how she's the main character, the one audiences are supposed to root for and identify with, it's probably not a good thing.

The Story: For the record, I have no problems with the story itself...the way it's written, however...

First off, there's too much filler. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, as filler episodes have the potential to be fun when written well. The problem is that relying on filler instead of telling your story can leave some people (me) uninterested and angry. And the thing is, there is a perfect way to avoid filler that doesn't involve telling the overarching narrative: Introduce personal plotlines. Look at The Owl House, for example. There are several character-oriented narrative threads that get introduced within the first few episodes. Such as Luz learning magic, Eda's curse, her relationship with Lilith, and Amity's redemption. Therefore, The Owl House avoids any filler episodes just as long as it focuses on any of these plotlines and even introduces new ones. Amphibia has the plotlines, but it rarely focuses on them. Especially since the story takes way too long to develop. 

Every time I think the show is finally going to start moving forward and we can continue the story, there are like ten more filler episodes where everything comes to a screeching halt. Now, to be fair, there is an explanation why we're forced to wait for the story to move forward, and it's because the characters are forced to wait as well. But, even then, there could have been better ways to pad out that waiting than just adding filler. For example, I may not have been forced into an alternate universe where nearly everything wants to kill me, but if I was, I WOULD SPEND EVERY WAKING MINUTE I HAVE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A WAY BACK! In the first season, how many episodes does Anne spend trying to figure out the mystery of how she got there and how to go home? Two. There are two whole episodes, out of thirty-nine, where Anne tries to figure things out...That is insane to me. But to be fair, season two is doing a much better job at moving things along...but it doesn't change the fact that the writers are kind of bad at telling their own story.

There are two episodes, "Anne Vs. Wild" and "Lost in Newtopia," where the story continues, but it's only in the last few minutes. The problem is that if you take those endings out, the episodes themselves do not change a bit. BUT because those are significant and essential moments for the plot, you can't take them out. Resulting in scenes that, while intriguing, come across as awkward in the long run. So now, my question is why. Why is the story handled so poorly? And I have one theory.

It Feels Like the Writers Can’t Decide What they Want the Show to be: Sometimes it seems like Amphibia is written as a pure slice of life series like Big City Greens. However, there are times when the show seems like it's intended to mix slice of life with fantasy like Gravity Falls. Now here's the problem: Big City Greens and Gravity Falls are two very different shows in terms of storytelling, tone, and character work. Big City Greens is an episodic comedy series where character development is unimportant, and the adventures rarely go beyond just being wacky. As for Gravity Falls, it is a show that is semi-serialized where the character development is constant, and the fantasy-adventures are always prevalent in every episode. And there are several episodes of Amphibia that could be a part of either show. Episodes like "Stakeout," "Lily Pad Thai," and "Little Frog Town" have plots that I can see being in Big City Greens. Then there are episodes like "The Domino Effect," "Toad Tax," and "Marcy at the Gates" that I could see being in Gravity Falls. These two groups of episodes are vastly different from one another that it causes Amphibia to feel disjointed in the process. Usually, I'm a fan when a series mixes different genres together, but do you want to know why something like Gravity Falls does such a great job at mixing slice of life with fantasy-adventure? Because, as I said, fantasy-adventures are always present in every episode. "Dipper vs. Manliness," "Boss Mabel," and "Roadside Attraction" each have the most basic slice of life plots of the show, but there is always a fantasy element or a monster to fight. There are entire episodes of Amphibia where there is no monster, and even when there is, it doesn't have the same amount of tension and weight that the creatures in Gravity Falls have weekly. A show like Big City Greens doesn't have to worry about monsters or evil villains every week because it doesn't need to. It's a show about the wacky adventures of a family of farmers adjusting to city life. Why would they have to worry about a monster every week when they just have to worry about each other. If Amphibia was the same way then there would be no issue. But because if it wants to be a mix of slice of life with fantasy, then it does need to worry about a monster every week. I usually try to defend shows that try to play both sides, but this show has to be the one occasion where I have to say pick one or the other. Because the writers tried hard to be both, and personally, I don't think they did a good job.

Characters Don’t. Stop. SCREAMING!: It's here we move on from what's objectively wrong with Amphibia to the things that just bother me personally...and this is one of those things. I get it. An over-the-top reaction to something minimal can be funny on occasion...but it's never "on occasion" with this show. Nearly every episode has characters screaming to get a laugh, and most of the time, it's more annoying than it is funny. It's Hop Pop who does this the most, and I just feel so bad for Bill Farmer. That voice already seems like it's hard to do, so being forced to scream and yell with it for the sake of comedy can't do him any favors. Other shows, especially ones on the Disney Channel, have characters overreact for the sake of humor, but it's Amphibia that I feel like it relies on this the most. I'm sure some people aren't bothered by this, but I am, and this is my review, so I'm mentioning it.

Poly: Speaking of things that probably don't bother other people...I feel like I'm making some enemies with this one. Because, boy, do I not like Polly. Her voice is annoying, she mostly causes problems for the family, and to me, her entire character seems pointless. No, really. Think about it. Anne is the main character, Sprigs acts as her emotional support, and Hop Pop acts as the voice of reason. What's Polly's purpose? Because all she adds are unnecessary jokes, character traits that could have gone to anybody, and acting more as a plot device than an actual character. The only justification for her that I can think of is that she adds gender balance to the main cast. Which would be more than acceptable if there was a point to her existence. But I think it's pretty evident with her exclusion from the original pilot pitch for the program that Polly's personality is practically pointless...that is most likely the only alliteration I'll ever do for a review, so you have better appreciated it.

If you like Polly, then more power to you. For me, I just don't enjoy her.

Sasha: Oh, nelly. I can already see the hateful messages I'm gonna get from this.

Now, as a character, I actually do like Sasha. I think her personality is interesting enough to dissect, and I think she acts as a perfect antagonist to Anne, the Plantars, and even Marcy if you want to get into it. My problem relies on how much the fanbase is already jumping on the "Forgive Sasha" train. Because, "Aw, she's just like Catra and Amity! So sweet, tortured, shippable with the main character, and--" STOP IT! Stop it right now...and think. With Catra and Amity, you see the environment they grew up in, you feel the abuse they deal with, you understand the reasoning of their actions, and you come to forgive them for who they are...At least for Amity, you can. For Catra, it requires more of an argument. But Sasha? Did we see the same cruel mistreatment to her friends? Did we hear the same coldness in her voice as she describes how to manipulate people? Did we witness the same damage she's done to Anne and Marcy in how they perceive healthy relationships? Apparently not! Because while everyone else is already on the same page that Sasha deserves redemption, I'm sitting here thinking that maybe it's for the best to be a little more hesitant. So far, we have yet to see any way to understand her reasoning and have yet to see how she deserves forgiveness. Sure, Sasha was willing to sacrifice herself for Anne, but did Sasha really earn that? It works as a sudden realization that Anne deserves better, but Sasha has yet to do anything that proves she can be better. Especially since the next time we see her, she's trying to help a fascist ruler get back up on his feet...THINK ABOUT THAT!

But, sure, she's meant to be forgiven. That can work. Because while Sasha shows kids the type of people they should avoid, she can also work as a warning for what kids should avoid becoming. That is a great thing to teach...but it can also be potentially dangerous. Because if incorrectly interpreted, Sasha can show kids that every person who seems toxic just needs a chance to change. And that is the last thing you want to teach, given how very few toxic people actually change. You want to know why The Owl House gets away with an equally dangerous lesson about how not every bully is awful? It's because it shows two sides of the spectrum by proving why someone like Amity did the things she's done while also saying that characters like Boscha and Mattholomule are just a-holes for the sake of being a-holes. Sasha has no one to compare to. Sure, there's King Andreas, but he's a government figure. They're built to be manipulative. Sasha needs someone that's on her level of cruelty to prove that while some people can change and have reason to do so, others don't. And seeing how I don't think she deserves to change, at least not yet, that is an issue. It's the biggest issue out of all the issues I have with this show.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, yeah, I think it's pretty evident how I feel about Amphibia when I can write paragraphs about the stuff I don't like while barely being able to talk about the things I do like. Because I do enjoy this show. It's funny, most of the characters are enjoyable, and its discussion on toxic relationships still has me hooked to see what happens next. My issue lies with inconsistency. The main protagonist, storytelling, genre, and thematic purposes are all inconsistent. I'm interested enough to watch more, and who knows, maybe I'll make a final verdict review once the series comes to an end. For now, if you had to ask me what I’m excited to make a return, I don't know if I'll be willing to hop to it by saying Amphibia.

(Also, if you're still looking for that link for that pirating website I mentioned, now would probably be a good time to tell you that I really never did put one in. I told you, that would be crazy...That should teach you to try to break the law.)

[watchinglikeafangirl]

Lovely Writer Episode 11 - analysis

I'm still not quite over yesterday's episode and I have a lot of thoughts about it, so I just need to get it out of my system and write yet another analysis because I'm so much invested.

I saw some people saying this week's episode was the weakest of them all and I can only disagree because in my opinion, Lovely Writer gets better week after week. The weakest episode so far was the first one. The truth about Nubsib is revealed pretty slowly and you can only see the entire picture after ep 7 or something and I believe this is very well done. First, Lovely Writer is about Nubsib and who he is and this show thankfully doesn't get boring as soon as we get to know everything. Then, another conflict steps up and they deal with the angst of them coming out to, not only their parents, but basically the whole world. It's just a very interesting and clever storywriting because it feels like the creators of this show know what they are talking about.

Sexuality

Just because I've seen this post about the dinner Gene has with his friends in ep 4, I'm gonna talk about how his sexuality is handled and how much he grows with it. Gene never has a real conflict with his sexuality, at least it never seems that way. He has his moments with Nubsib and when they kiss, he likes it a lot but it's never a topic. He never says "I'm gay" but you can feel that he's not uncomfortable because Nubsib is a man but because Nubsib is invading his personal space. When Gene has dinner with his friends, they ask him more than once if he is gay or not. This whole scene was just very awkward and Gene doesn't really give them any answer. He doesn't deny it but he doesn't clarify it either. It's just a vibe we're getting that he's sure he's not straight. But this is an unspoken truth and I believe, he is not ready to clarify it yet because he doesn't want to say anything if he's not 100% sure.

Later in the show, Gene clarifies his sexuality alongside his sort of love confession when he shouts at his father. I find this extremely powerful because Gene waits until he's really in love with someone until he says anything about his sexuality. Like him falling for a man was his verification. And after he said it and stood up for it, he's a lot more relaxed and self-confident. He never denies it, even when his father first looks like he's not approving the relationship, because that's who he is. That is his identity.

Them vs the outside

It's something I've already addressed in my other analyses, but this devide returns every single episode. The first 20mins of this episode, we get cute SibGene scenes in Nubsib's apartment and it's basically them just being happy boyfriends. But then, Hin calls and the fairytale is over. The real world is back and it's again, nothing positive. As soon as the outside invades their lives again, the amount of couple moments stops and things are more serious now. Here, the problem grows slowly until it's huge and over these, I guess, 70mins, every argument and point of view is presented to then draw a big picture of the whole conflict itself and the tough decision they have to make. First, we have Gene not worrying, then him saying their love is between two people only, then Bua saying others rely on this and then Tum's sister saying fans are going wild. It's a lot to take and right before the big blow, we get a scene of Gene and Nubsib just holding each other (here). They still haven't seen the entirety of this problem and believe they will overcome it.

They feel sort of untouchable now that they have promised each other grand things and all that. They overcame the fight with the parents and bonded even more over it, so nothing could come between them. That's why we don't get their reactions to the Tweets, because they feel invincible and don't really worry about it. It is a sign of their seriousness and belief that they are strong together.

This episode started with their "love being between two people" and ended with their "love breaking beause of other people".

Love vs reputation

This brings me to this section of my analysis. The problem with this conflict is that there is no right solution and I still don't know what I would've done. Nubsib doesn't care about others but Gene does. It's a dilemma with no right or wrong. Both sides are understandable. The problem is that they both misunderstand each other. Gene thinks Nubsib is selfish and Nubsib thinks Gene only cares about others. Right now, they can't have both: love and the others. It's either one of them and both options mean a great sacrifice.

Repuation means a lot in the show business and even though Nubsib doesn't seem to care about it, it's very important and what the film industry relies on. His love for Gene causes the whole production to collapse and backfire because "SibAoey is not true". Their real love feels like a crime because it could mean the end for a few people (talking about Tum). So, it's love vs reputation, truth vs lie and them vs the outside.

In the end, Gene doesn't want to cause even more damage. He choses to damage two lives in order to keep hundreds save and I totally get where he is coming from but he's sacrificing his happiness. Nubsib was his redemption. A door to love and the end of loneliness. Now, Gene is back where he was and even more closeted now.

But his decision is very in character because he has proven before that he has his shell he's crawling into whenever things get too tense. He shuts the world and everyone else out in order to be alone in his head. So, he even pushes Nubsib away even though Nubsib showed him a happy life outside of that shell which is why Gene porbably feels really depressed living alone. If you once get to see, taste and feel happiness, you can't just let go and forget it.

During the break-up we even see Nubsib changing his mind (mentioned here). First, he wants to convince Gene to see things like he does and is not ready to change his mind. But then he realizes Gene is still the creator of "Bad Engineer". He put a lot of work and heart into the novel and Nubsib's solution to the problem would cause peple to badmouth Gene's story. So, Nubsib is ready to even agree to the option the company presented: only meeting in private. But Gene is so worked up at this point and has made up his mind that he sees no point in them being together and storms off to go back into his nutshell. In this moment, hiding seems to be easier for him than enduring the confrontation.

Protection of the fairytale

As I already said, Gene and Nubsib live in their fairytale and up until now we thought Nubsib is the only one who would do everything to protect it and prevent the outside from stepping in - and people still think that. But guys, don't forget that Gene knew about the Twitter thing as well. He also didn't address the issue. He also wanted to protect this faitytale and happiness.

This protection of what's very dear to them got puched in the face during the tough meeting. There's a lot of pressure and they have to decide what to do. They have no time to discuss and come to an agreement. People want answers right now, so each of them doesn't know what to do and just seeks understanding in each other's face. Nubsib and Gene don't sit next to each other to make the decision together, unlike the coming out to the parents when Nubsib took Gene's hand. This time, they look at each other with a look of horror and that's simply all they can do. They can't hold hands to reasure each other they will endure this no matter what (mentioned here).

What this show always showed is that Gene and Nubsib are strong together. They might act tough sometimes but they are both weak in a way that they need each other, that they need to lean onto each other. But that's not possible here and this protection of the fairytale no longer exists and is no longer possible. They can't protect their hearts right now and don't even have a chance. It feels like a metaphor to predict what is about to come. It's "a heart ripped in two" or "two hands ripped apart" if you want to be dramatic.

Nubsib

I still can't tell who Nubsib is. I feel we're lacking of information about him. Does he have any hobbies? Does he have at least one friend? Does he have a life apart from Gene? I feel like I'm watching Twilight. When Gene was driving back to his apartment and left Nubsib on the bed, I got really excited for a second we would finally see what he does in his alonetime but no, they cut to Gene and Hin's talk.

But really guys, what does Nubsib do when he's alone? Gene seems to be his hobby, his friend, his life...talking about toxicness here. And Gene still doesn't see it...

Aoey

Well, what should I say? I have no sympathy or pity left for him. I already analyzed his behavior this episode here and don't want to repeat myself.

Conclusion

This episode, again, contained a lot of angst, tension and uncomfort. Things were crashing down again and I just have to shout out to the actors and director and all of them. The scene of the break-up had me crying for 10mins and when Nubsib said "don't cry", I broke. Honestly. This made everything even more bittersweet and painful because you can feel the love they have and Nubsib still cares a lot, so he tries to comfort Gene but Gene pushes him away. It is an act of desperation. Nubsib doesn't want Gene to leave and tries to make it better but in the end Gene has made his decision.

But, but, but, what is going on with Tiffy? Why is she mistrusting Tum so much and pushes him away again? And why the hell doesn't she say anything to Aoey and believes his mindgames? Does she know something I don't? Can she tell what's real and what isn't? Because I can't and I'm usually good at reading people. And where is Mhok? Did Aoey scare him away? Did he just give up? So many questions and no answers.

I'm excited for next week!

[hieludoboi]

Or so You Believed

A/n- sorry I’ve been gone! I’m trying to get requests done but I’ve been going through quite the writers block! I’ll get those requests out as soon as I can, I promise! For now please enjoy some Kuroo Angst

A/n- Ahahahahahahaha I feel like garbage and I can’t write. I put this through grammarly and it said I had bland writing and that made me sad? Anyway, I’ll try and get to finishing requests but I’m going through a bit of an episode rn :( I really do hope you guys enjoy this though, and I’m sorry if this is bad :(

A/n- I went through and fixed a few spelling and grammar mistakes! This story should now be entirely gender neutral! If you fin any mistakes pleaseeeeee let me know! 

Pairing Kuroo/Gender Neutral! Reader

Summary- A summer fling had led to more than either one of them had bargained for. 

Warnings- Mentions and slight portrayal of nsfw things, yelling, breakdowns, Angst, breaking up, crying, just very sad in general :(

At that moment it had all felt right. His lips were gentle against their skin, fitting perfectly on theirs. His scent had stained their sheets, and the taste of his lips constantly lingered on their lips. It had felt right, being tangled in a disarray of sheets and pillows, hands and lips roaming yet never straying too far. At that moment they were gone, wrapped away in a blissful dance of warm comfort and empty words. Kuroo could feel their hands leaving a trail as they drew maps on his skin, he could taste the desperation on their lips, and for moments he wondered if they could taste his desperation as well. 

A little fling was all it was. Constant text messages and calls, flirtatious joking, it was perfect. So where had they gone wrong? One way or another they began to spiral, separate pieces of the same thread unraveling to reveal frayed edges and tips; they were never a whole thread, always separate strings. Some days it was his fault, other days it was their fault. Official, it was all they had wanted. They wanted him to hold them close, play with their hair, and stroke their arms. Intimacy is what they craved, sought out in any form he was able to offer. 

Long nights were spent in bed together, frayed threads tangled in desperate attempts to pass through the eye of the needle as one. They had hoped that his warm touch would fix it all, hoped that the words he mumbled in their ear as their bodies messily embroidered, were truth and not false nets of lies to catch onto as they fell. 

Tonight was different. Hands and lips wandered but never strayed, and not for Kuroo’s sake, but their sake. Kuroo knew, even though they never talked about it, even though their lips were sealed, Kuroo could still see the haze that fogged their eyes. Their last relationship had pulled a plug on their certain spark, left them empty, and Kuroo could see it. As they looked for ways to fill an empty shell, they had stumbled upon Kuroo. Kuroo and his cocky charm, Kuroo and his purring voice, Kuroo and his stable arms. Kuroo provided safety, security, touch, emotion, something that was previously unavailable in their last relationship. So maybe that’s why they thought they loved him. 

Tonight, it was different. There was an unusual intensity behind every kiss and nibble, an unexpected spark in every touch. Their eyes were fogged, clouded, and misty, Kuroo knew that something was different. So he stopped their hands, gently pushed them away, and stared at them with pitiful eyes. It was obvious what they wanted. They wanted Kuroo to have every inch of them, take them, and fill the void that was left behind.

“Why’d you stop?” Y/n stared up at Kuroo, a certain pain in their eyes. Were they not good enough for him?

“Y/n, you’re not in a good state of mind for this.” His voice was calm, gentle, and stable, but they didn’t like the look in his eyes, the look of pity and worry.

“Kuroo, I’m fine. I’m ready, okay? I want my first time to be with you. Kuroo I... I love you.” their voice was soft, shaking, and unstable. They were breaking, and Kuroo knew they were. Yet still, he flinched, stopping to hold one of their hands. 

“No. You don’t love me, okay? You-you think you do, but you don’t. You know what you feel, and you know it’s not for me, I know that you know this isn’t right.” Kuroo explained gently, squeezing their hand just a bit. Y/n aggressively pulled away from Kuroo, holding their hand to their chest and staring at him with frayed e/c eyes. 

“Who are you to tell me what I feel? I love you Kuroo, okay? I l-” Y/n flinched, practically jumping back as Kuroo abruptly stood up, towering over them.

“Stop saying that! You only think you love me because you don’t know what love is! All you’ve ever felt is toxicity, guys who use you and toss you to the side. Guys who want you to be emotionally available at all times but won’t even talk to you! Y/n, you don’t know what it is!” Kuroo’s voice was faltering. It was unstable and his eyes were beginning to fill with tears. 

“You know what I feel when I’m with you? I feel warm, okay? And-and I feel safe! I feel like I’m gonna be okay and that anytime I fall you’ll be there to catch me!” Y/n screamed at Kuroo, tears endlessly flowing down their face. Kuroo stared at them in disbelief. Maybe Kuroo did love them, but he knew that they still hadn't got over their past relationship. Kuroo could see the fog in their eyes anytime they spoke about it, he noticed the way they tensed up anytime they would see him in the halls, he could hear them mumble their name as they slept. 

He stayed quiet for some time, staring down at the sobbing figure before him. They didn’t know love yet. Kuroo looked the other way, his lip caught between his teeth. He did love them, but he wasn’t ready. Kuroo wasn’t ready to commit yet. He would only bring them more heartache, and he cared for them too much to hurt them. 

“I-” Kuroo could feel the air catch in his chest. His eyes were wide and his hands were shaking. He hated it, but for them to know what love really is, they would have to experience true pain. 

“I don’t love you, okay?” Kuroo looked the other as he spoke, glaring at the bunny plushie thrown into the corner of their room. He could hear the air catch in their throat, could hear the pain as it rattled their rib-cage with each shaky breath they took. It made Kuroo ache, made him shake with a burn he had never felt before.

“You don’t mean that...” Their voice was shaking, body trembling with despair as they clumsily stood up, hands desperately reaching for Kuroo’s. As soon as he felt their hand brush against his he snatched it away.

“Kuroo, please, please stop...” Every word they spoke was interlaced with breath hitches and stumbles. Their heart was racing and their world felt light. What were they feeling? Why were they feeling this?

“Kuroo, answer me! Please...” They screamed at first, the hysteria obvious in there voice, but as they spoke, their voice collapsed becoming nothing more than a soft whisper. He had to be lying, they thought to themselves, hands trembling as they clasped them atop their chest. 

“I mean it okay. I don’t love you. I never did.” Y/n stared at him with horror, mouth agape as they watched him walk out of their bedroom. As soon as he closed the door, they crumbled. The last pieces of thread that had kept them together were finally frayed, violently detaching themselves from one another for good.

Tears trailed down his face as he walked home, hands shoved in his pockets while his eyes focused on his shoes. Maybe he did love them. Maybe for a split-second, the threads had all twisted perfectly, maybe for a second, they had passed through the eye. Maybe, but it was better this way. Y/n deserved better, deserved someone who wouldn’t be afraid to truly love them, someone who would be willing to improve for them. That someone was not him. Or so he believed.

[thevictoryofthepeople]

*♡･ﾟ:* Get To Know The Writer!

REPOST DON’T REBLOG

———  BASICS! ♡

NAME: mc / mimi / charm / vi

PRONOUNS: she / her ( but lately been questioning a lot of things about myself so we’ll see how it goes )

ZODIAC SIGN: cancer ( but my best friend will scream scorpio or sagittarius lmao )

TAKEN OR SINGLE: taken for like the better part of 2 & 1/2 years

———  THREE  FACTS! ♡

i have a bachelors in psychology and i’m currently saving up money to go to med school to be a psychiatrist. i have worked and taken interest in a lot different psych fields but i notably worked during college in an education lab studying the effects of multilingual learning in the classroom especially for minority students, and a sleep lab so if you want fun facts about sleep and memory my dumbass self can probably tell you some things

i have a series, a novel, a poetry book, and short story collection currently in the works but i’ve been super busy and tired that i have not had time to actually write them ( big sad ) 

i like to dance and sing and make music. when i was less busy and frantic, i wrote songs and made beats and i have some things saved up. i was also learning 8 other languages but fucking life so now i’m only re-learning spanish and learning french. but i’m just...busy cuz adulting and living in america isn’t cheap

———  EXPERIENCE! ♡

i was in the percy jackson fandom and i got into roleplaying then like a long time ago. then my two longest and most wonderful rp partners also mentors, drew-a-tanaka & ribbedxgloves, took me under their wings and wrote with me and taught me stuff about the rp community. i haven’t left since. i never really went on any other platform and this blog is ancient. all my characters are ocs and even my gods are mainly of my own creation, and i continuously add more because no one stops. i have ocs that seem like au’s of their fcs and they’re not but after a while of being here and thinking of elaborate backgrounds and just having them pile up, sometimes i get lazy changing their first name which is super dumb of me because their last names are different but i was like hahahah not changing your first name

———  MUSE  PREFERENCE! ♡

i like muses that can make me feel honestly. who i can instantly vibe with. i also have 150 muses ( maybe more, i’m kidding i’m not that crazy sometimes ) so it’s never really difficult to find the right one that can connect with someone else’s character. i just really love storybuilding and interlocked muses. like my whole world now ( in the main verse ) is based off the world i created with my girlfriend and you will see me mention greyson or cho or pack when it comes to some of my characters because it’s from having interlocked muses, and i am always down for that. just make all the worlds with me and let’s just have fun

———  FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT! ♡    

FLUFF: listen i have so many assholes they need the fluff lmao, but also like in general i adore it. i write pretty things when fluff is involved and it just makes me happy and giddy so give it to me always

ANGST: I LOVE ANGST. like please give me toxicity and anger and frustration and questioning loyalties. i did this more when i had my horror blog but sometimes i just want my muses to suffer for no damn reason. and then sometimes i really do want a well-thought out plot for angst

SMUT: i will write but i also don’t feel much for it. like if it happens, it happens. i go into explicit detail when i write it but it’s always under a read more. and honestly i only true care about smut when the ship involved is super well thought out and there’s more to than just sex. even with my like super sexually charged ships ( i.e. geryon and drew ) they both have this elaborate plot going on and this demon / demigod dynamic that’s fun to write and they’re not all just about sex despite it being a factor in their relationship

PLOT / MEMES: i ramble a lot so give me the plots, all of it. i’m always so excited and happy and i just love them so much. i like exploring new ideas. memes are great too but honestly i tend to post a lot of memes so people can reblog without having to go to the source lmao. you all can always reblog from me i do not mind and you are more than welcome to send me stuff <3 <3 <3 

TAGGED BY: @lighthousc​ ( my light thank you ! ) TAGGING ( please only do if you want ! no pressure ever ! ): @drew-a-tanaka​; @ribbedxgloves​; @etcrnalsunshine​; @catcherisms​; @heartsawaken​; @tckkis​; @thewhitepoison​; @xxsacrificiumxx​; @kitsunewrites​; @snowdrcps​; @cinnamcnhearts​

[onthevirgeofdestruction]

35 Q’s for Fanfic Writers

From this post

I’m having a shitty, rude alter-y, crap night so I’m just going to answer all of these to distract myself and focus and to not bother anybody just making my own post and putting it under the cut btw, notice to anyone not aware: since I’m moving I won’t likely be updating anything until I’m done doing so.

1. From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing?  (No downplaying yourself!) 3/5? Could use more editing and description and can be weirdly paced.

2. Why do you write fanfiction? Because it’s better than focusing on pain 24/7. 

3. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works? I don’t seem to have a specific narrative voice that people recognize but I’m pretty proud of mostly organic dialogue. 

4. Are there any writers that inspire you? as a rule i never look up to anybody for inspiration but there’s some stuff in my ao3 bookmarks I fawn over.

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of? Right now, none of them. It changes normally, anyway. If get too proud then I’d get my ass kicked by RSD if someone didn’t like it so it’s safer this way

6. What element of writing do you find comes easily? Dialogue. 

7. What element of writing do you struggle with most? Organic description, poetic language kind of stuff. I can paint a scene but I’m not so great with bring out out a feeling with description alone.

8. Which character(s) do you find easiest to write? Janus and Virgil are probably tied. They both have things I struggle with but I don’t have to go back and do much adjusting of language and tone with them. Though admittedly my Virgil is signifigantly more foul-mouthed than canon and I tend to prefer pre-AA feral asshole Virgil.

9. Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write? Patton. I write him the least, so people can probably tell. I love Patton, I really do, but it’s so hard to keep away from fanon Patton. 

10. What’s your favorite genre to write for? Angst w/ H/C obviously. Or if you’re talking about regular book genres, Fantasy. I fucking love fantasy world building.

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most? Trauma. I blame Daeram. As if Ayri isn’t a giant Angst Demon.

12. Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about. Slopes. I’m really into it. I’ve got three one shots running right now. Patrons can read the first part of the unnamed cat remus one, there’s also a coffeeshop au tropey nonsense one like eglantine & lycoris, but Slopes is addiction angst. Mmmmm. Virgil is addicted to coke and alcohol and will listening to his friends even be in time? Who knows, especially not me, but there’s already over 30k. 

13. First fandom you ever wrote for? InuYasha. Or was it Harry Potter? Or shit, The Blue Sword? Fuck, I’ve been writing for a long time, I really have no idea.

14. What’s your favorite fandom to write for? Sanders Sides. The characters are the perfect dynamic for writing since they exist in balance of each other and the popular, easy to project on archetypes featured are incredibly fun to do basically any scenario with.

15. What’s the weirdest fandom you’ve ever written for? Weird storywise? Kingdom Hearts? I can’t even follow the plot anymore. Weird Fandomwise? Sanders Sides. Its simultainiously the fluffiest and angstiest nonsense at the same time.

16. Any guilty pleasure trope(s)? Vampires. Gay ones. Gay Vampires. I also love calm tol and angy smol.

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for. Any tropes that normalize incredibly toxic behaviour or tropes that are inherantly ableist, but I can’t think of any.

18. Wildest fic you’ve ever written? Incorrigible continues to be complete nonsense.

19. Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between? AUs. I mean closest I even have is canon-divergence other than a single short.

20. Gen fic or shippy stuff? I like it when there is gay nonsense along with a plot that is treated as more important than the relationship the most. But I like both. There’s more shippy stuff in tss so i read more shipping action by default.

21. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!) Anxceit/Sleepxiety, but in general, give me darksides or give me death/j

22. Do you listen to anything while you write? Almost everything I write has a special playlist I listen to to help me write it, but otherwise I listen to my Nyan playlist, an alter is picking the tunes, or a voidfam playlist. I never have music off. When my internet is down I just listen to the songs I own or Anxiety’s theme on loop.

23. Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas? I’m fine with all of them. I love working with prompts but I tend to deviate. And I’ve never done a challenge since I can’t do deadlines and bad things happen bingo never sent me a card and I applied three times.

24. One-shots or multi-chaptered works? I am generally multi-chaptered stuff, but I’ve been working on a few one-shots lately that are much longer than most one shots.

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them! I was originally thinking of doing some little 13-year-old Dreaming!Roman (y’know, the one with a job) shorts but it turns out I just had an alter of that little bastard and that’s why I inexplicably know more about him then I ever even considered. I still might do them after Dreaming is done. But that’s paced so slowly who knows when that might happen. Otherwise I put stuff in my notes and just do shorts of it if I’m like “oh you know what’s cool???” but since I can’t daydream maybe this question doesn’t apply to me.

26. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try? I want to do more autism stuff, and I’ve had it demanded a few times, but I’m scared of being that explict about it for some reason. Possibly because I might be, possibly because I’m scared of doing it wrong even though I’ve accidentally coded multiple characters autistic. I’m scared of explictly tagging them as such, too. 

27. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received? That I can remember off the top of my head? I’m going with one from @a-genz-with-trauma-and-kins. It really helped me out and was just so kind and literally the best christmas gift I got in 2020. 

28. How well do you handle criticism when it comes to your writing? I can handle it alright but Daeram is a little fucking pissbaby about it. Constructive criticism helps people get better, so I appreciate it. I can’t handle critism that is incomplete, though. “i just don’t get it” or “I don’t know I don’t like it” kind of things. If I can’t understand the why to fix it then things get out of control. And then I spiral and RSD for like four days minimum. If it came from an anon or a troll, too, It might not bother me for as long. Things that are just like “this is shit and you should feel bad” just make me laugh. Couldn’t even bother to read it long enough to insult me proper? I don’t care.

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out? I have a few times. Mostly in shorts and prompts, I think. I think they turned out okay. They’re not particularly inspired or anything.

30. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst? Depends on my mood. Am I triggered? give me the fluff. Am I vibin? Angst. 

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them! Fuck, fam, no, I can’t, I have so many. I have multiple original stories and some of them have very large casts and like holy fuck. Or do you mean in Sanders Sides fandom? Um, Morgan and Thorn in PD. The lesbian and her himbo dynamic. I love them. They’re dorks. Morgan is strong person with sharp tongue and soft romantic heart and Thorn is just so kind and so dumb and so exciteable he’s like a puppy. They were just filler characters and I got attached to them. Felton even gets redemption for being an ass later in PD, like oof i never intended to include so much OC content, especially for names I just picked randomly. 

32. Summarize a random fic of yours in 10 words or less. nope I’m doing all of them because these are fun plea for my new self: 2 gay vampires, 4 humans, 1 braincell dreaming while I wake: trauma child needs therapy and so do you break: big oof, oh dragons, oh why, go virgil go rebuild: virgil is so not okay there’s more virgil to deal painful death: gay teens drink themselves into a new religion stargazing: whoops we didn’t realize people actually cared whole castle: everyone will throw down for kid!patton, even you incorrigible: found family with a shot of psychological horror and crack dangerous instincts: wholesome crime syndacite action  slopes: addict gets mugged and thinks that’s just fine with him conflagration: logan avoids everything ever like a champ cat!remus: bored fae shifts gay pining from one person to another  caffeine cyptids: caffinated gay panic goes faster than regular gay panic eglantine & lycoris: more tropes than you can toss a shoe at storytime: overpowered virgil also overreacts literally always

33. Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process? an alter and I write together and I have absolutely no idea what’s going to happen, what I’m writing about, or even what year it is. I often don’t even remember what I wrote. There’s no outline. I have an idea and I pick things at random for it. There’s just notes and an evil gleam in a demon’s eye. The only reason I know more than readers is because I take a long time to edit and some of these stories have fucking alters up in my head who can tell me things. Daeram tells me nothing. The writing demon supposedly has all this knowledge but I have absolutely no clue because he does not talk to me, he just fronts and slams out 9k in a few hours or we cofront to write and I’m like “oh no she didn’t” while typing 

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of. i’m fond of the entire painful death series and I tried to find something I really liked without spoilers in stargazing and I couldn’t so here’s a random thing from incorrigble: “So, what do you do with your friends?” Patton continued on with a megawatt smile. “Grand larceny,” Virgil deadpanned and glared at Patton, who was taken aback. Remy and Andy just broke out laughing while Virgil tentatively sipped his still-too-hot-cocoa. 

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!  slopes my dudes slopes i have learned so much about cocaine! like wow! I thought for a minute it was going to end with MCD around 30k but it swtiched from whump to hurt/comfort and I still don’t know if it’s going to be MCD but look at that funky little coke/alcohol addict go, it’s a medical wonder he’s alive! It’s not like there’s what seems to be a little talked about interaction between alcohol and cocaine that causes a toxic chemical to build up in the liver which can result in liver failure and sudden death at basically any moment! Which is part of why it may result in MCD but this time no ghosts! maybe it’ll be h/c with whump elements or maybe it’ll be whump with h/c elements we can’t know for sure

[hamatoclan76]

My favourite TMNT 2012 episodes (part 1)

I have been thinking writing about my favourite episodes for quite while now.Keep in mind this is not supposed to be a list of ¨ top best episodes¨ from tmnt 2012. There are many episodes that i think that are amazing but they don´t enter in my favourite list episodes for different reasons.

Most of the episodes i included in this list are the ones i often find myself rewatching and are the first that pop up in my mind when thinking about the series. 

I'm going to write two parts about this because i don't want to make the post so long.

Let´s start!:

Slash and Destroy 

When tmnt 2012 fans and non- fans talk about the best episodes of the series, most of the time they mention Slash and Destroy and it´s easy to see why:

The episode itself plays like a psychological horror movie, with Slash as a physical manifestation of Raphael´s darkest desires. He represents everything that Raph could become if he let the most toxic parts of his personality take control him.

Slash himself it´s very good antagonist, he isn´t just some random mutant that appears to destroy Raph´s brothers. He´s Raphael´s best friend and he knows many things that the rest of the Hamato family doesn´t. His uses this at his advantage to make Raph join his side and leave his brothers.

Raph in this episode is fantastic as well. We get to see a lot of his character, from his bad temper and how he thinks the team is ¨holding him back¨ to how far he willing to go to protect his family, even if that means fighting his friend.

Despite it´s tone Slash and Destroy has some of the funniest moments in the season: The subplot about Leo trying to get the mutantgen canister from other humans it´s hilarious. It doesn´t feel forced and doesn´t interrupt the drama, it´s nicely connected to the rest of the story.

I could write a lot about what makes this episode work so well, but i would like to keep that for other post.

New Girl In Town

This episode serves as introduction for Karai´s character and it´s one of my favourite for many reasons:

1)  It´s excellent for Raphael´s and Leonardo´s character arcs. Leonardo tired of how his brother doesn´t respect him as leader, decides to leave the role to Raph since he thinks it would be better if he was the one in charge.

Later, Raph finds out that being the leader isn´t as easy as it seems, when he's forced to give an order that would put the life of his brothers at risk he completely freezes up. He learns he can´t handle the burden of making difficult decisions as he cares for his family so much he´s afraid of accidentatly hurting them.

As for Leonardo, he tries doing things his own way for once, he decides to take a break from the team and ¨have fun¨.  In this episode he acts more like a "rebel" than his typical "good boy", which is quite refreshing to see.

He also learns that he shouldn't expect getting praise for being the leader. Splinter explains to him that the important part of being the one giving the orders is choosing to carry the burden. That's why Leo is the leader because he knows he has to be responsible in making decisions.

2) Karai is very interesting character that completely changes the dynamic of the main protagonists. She usually likes playing Leo and tries pursuing to join the bad side in this episode.

Her exchanges between Leo are very entertaing as well. They acts as friendly rivals and we get to see that she's actually not that bad in the end since she helps the turtles fighting Snakeweed.

"New girl in the town" it's a wonderful introduction for her, as it shows her as someone who it's morally gray instead of just evil.

3) The fight at the end is awesome. I really like how Leo and Raph work together to defeat Snakeweed. Raph decides to trust Leo's orders and follow his commands.

I think it's good way of showing they both have learned their lessons and how their relationships is changing.

Metalhead rewired

One thing i really like of tmnt 2012 it when two character fight, there isn't always one side who it's "right" and other who is "wrong". Sometimes they both make good points and "Metalhead rewired" is a good example of that.

This one is great for Donnie since he really wants to help the team with his inventions but.. as Leo tells him, they can be a bit dangerous and Donnie can lose control of them.

Here we get to see how Donnie's passion for science and technology can put his brothers at risk and how Leonardo also can be stubborn at times and struggles with being open to new ideas.

It's one of those rare instances in the series in which we see Leo and Donnie fight. They usually get on well since Donnie has no problem with following orders. He sometimes sarcastic with Leo but he rarely tries to an argument the same way that Raph does.

The thing it's that Donnie's and Leo's arguments are usually more about strategy than personal problems. While Raph's and Leo's fight are related to their slibing rivaliry and how their personalities clash with each other.

This episode deals with loss as well: Metalhead sacrifices himself to help the turtles escaping from the Kraang prision. While it's true that he can be rebuild it, i think it's still a pretty sad moment that it shows that Metalhead was a robot with good intentions in the end.

Vengeance is Mine

This another very memorable episode that tons of fans remember. The plot and the dialogue it's very well written and much like "Slash and Destroy" has tons of metaphors that worth of analyzing.

This episode it's mainly about Karai and her relationship with Shredder. It how revenge often being doing more harm than good and end up hurting everyone involved.

It starts with great action scene about the turtles helping Karai escape from Shredder's prision. Overall it's very intense scene due to being surronded by very dangerous enemies and they in Shredder's lair.

The scene in which Karai reunites with Splinter is really heartwarning. She doesn't say any word, she just.. hugs him, happy that she finally able to be with her real father. It's a very memorable scene.

And i really love how she later hangs out with the turtles during their training. It's such a cute scene.

The problem is that Karai really wants to make Shredder pay for what he had done to her family. Splinter tells her it's not really worth of her time, that all that matters is that they are now finally able to be together.

Karai sneaks out anyways and she gets captured by Shredder.

This forces the turtles and Splinter to go rescue her. While they are fighting, Oroku Saki accidentantly cuts the chain that holds Karai, making her fall into the mutagen and transforming her into giant snake.

I think i really like how the episode ends in a tragedy, showing how blinded Saki has become for getting his revenge that he even hurt someone he considered her daughter in the process. The scene is acts as a parallel to death, who died exactly in the same way.

Buried Secrets

I really enjoyed April the first time watching the series. It's was very interesting to me to see this girl that used to have a normal life have it completely changed because of the Kraang and "Buried Secrets" was not the exeption.

I really like the amount of psychological horror this episode has: April just wants to be with her lost mother who really turns out a defective monsters that shares her mother's memories and devours each one of the turtles.

On one hand April is finally able to learn more about her backstory and why she has Kraang powers. It was something that wasn't completely necessary for the series to explore but i really like the writers took the time to explain how O' Neil family was being experimented on.

On the other hand it's a really sad since her "mother" wasn't real in first place. It's has to be desvasting to find out your mother/father is really just a monster who is hurting your friends.

And like i said, this is one of the scariest enemies in tmnt 2012. It's very creepy how she just goes hunting each turtles one by one and no one know what's happening.

Mikey was great here too. He was the one that first suspected that April's mother wasn't what she appeared to be. It shows that while he sometimes he's a bit naive, he knows when something is seems off and take things more seriously.

------

Okay, i leave the list here for know. I would probably be posting the other half during the weekend.

I hope you enjoyed my post! Feel free to talk about your favourite episodes in the comments (or by reblog). I would like to see which ones you like.

[nichester]

Review: Extracurricular

Media Type: Korean Drama

Genre: Teen drama/Crime/Noir

Summary:  Ji Soo, a diligent but poor high school student is saving for college and paying rent by moonlighting as a pimp.  His precarious balance of school and work begins to fall apart when another student, Gyu-ri, discovers the truth about his job and wants in.  Things spiral quickly out of their control.

Why you might care:  If you enjoy watching teenagers do crime and get realistically in over their heads; if you are interested in dark shows with Really Good performances (in particular from the leads, who have enough chemistry for us to buy their toxic but unbreakable bond) or if you are interested in any of the themes of crime and class struggle.

Why you might not care:  Give this one a pass if you don't like your shows dark and/or are looking for a happy ending. Importantly, pay attention to potential triggers in this show! (Suicidal ideation, self harm, violence against women, sexual assault, hallucinations, and torture all occur, although not always explicitly, on this show.  Feel free to message me if you need more detailed warnings!)

Trope Bingo! Partners in crime/Bonnie and Clyde; enemies to sorta? lovers, literally I have no idea how to categorize their relationship

If you liked _______, try ______!

Can't say I've watched much in this vein! I've heard that School 2013 or Sky Castle are both excellent dramas about struggling high schoolers, but which have less grim endings.  The Get Down is a great netflix show also about marginalized teenagers struggling to pursue their dreams despite the crime and violence they're surrounded by.

~Spoilers (not anything detailed but just to be safe) and overall thoughts under the cut~

Plot:  I'll be honest, I'm not a big plot girl. Unless there's something stand-out about a story's plot, I tend to consider it more as a vehicle for character development than anything else. In this show's case, I was on the edge of my seat in horror for most episodes. The plot unfolds in a seemingly inevitable negative spiral that takes all of our characters down and leaves them far worse off than when they started. This show did rely a lot on coincidence, both positive and negative. Usually I would consider this a flaw, but I think it worked well here as a way to portray a random, unfeeling world around the characters and to emphasize the precarious nature of their situation.

Central character(s):  I was really attached to both of the leads. They had the convincing contradictions and vulnerabilities of deeply troubled teenagers, and their different traumas and personalities played off of each other well. For all of Ji Soo's smarts and skill, he has a startling naivete and a tendency to panic when things don't go according to plan. Gyu-ri is equally smart, but loud and manipulative in contrast to Ji Soo's awkwardness and isolation. Gyu-ri pushes Ji Soo to try to expand his business to make up for his unexpected losses (decisions that drive the plot), but this goes against his every cautious instinct.  Ji Soo tends to focus on maintaining what little he has, while Gyu-ri fully embraces the philosophy "the best defense is a good offense." Indeed, Gyu-ri is reckless to the point of suicidal, but the later episodes reveal a protective instinct that seems to be as unexpected to her as it is to the audience, an instinct which continually drives her to throw herself into harms way in defense of Ji Soo.  The strongest development that both characters had was in their relationship with each other, which led them to be both braver and more open than they had ever been in their lives. But their involvement with each other and their reluctance to cut ties is part of how they got to where the show leaves them--cornered and bloody.

Romance:  Technically this show has no romance, but I think it's fair to say that the leads develop an obsessive, Bonnie and Clyde-style relationship that is partially romantic in nature. Ji Soo has a distant crush on Gyu-ri at the beginning of the show, which she exploits. Honestly, some of the funniest moments in the show come from the contradiction between Ji Soo's side-hustle as a pimp and his complete and total inability to speak normally in Gyu-ri's presence. His disillusionment with her is genuinely painful, but necessary for their relationship to become one of equals. Their grudging partnership is abrasive, but their bond feels very convincing. No matter how much they resent each other, they're more strongly drawn to each other. (Watching Ji Soo pack up her discarded chip bags to bring with him on the run is just….. Its so….. Kids make me cry ok!)  It's clear for both of these lonely and deeply messed up kids that simply having a partner--someone who they can reveal their ugly sides to and depend on--is an intoxicating feeling. By the end of the show, they'd kill for each other and probably die for each other. The show smartly doesn't ever "consummate" the romance--they don't really have enough downtime when they're not actively fighting to make it convincing, and despite everything they've done both characters are still very young.  If there is a second season, this is a ship that is likely to sail (but possibly crash and burn).

Side Characters/Side plots:  In a show like this one, which depicts a marginalized and frequently abused group of women, the presence of sympathetic characters who are also members of that group is crucial, or the drama would feel exploitative. This show's most prominent side plot depicts an underage sex worker, her post-traumatic stress response to a violent client, her struggle over whether or not to speak to the police, and her desire to find genuine human connection, whether it is with her shitty boyfriend or with her pimp. (Their odd father/daughter relationship was one of the most moving parts of the show!) While I thought the writing was sympathetic to Minhee's situation, she is frequently used as a reminder of the human consequences of the other character's actions. This is both good and bad--it's important to remind the characters and the viewer of how damaging their behavior is, but it also risks treating her as a more of a tool for the lead's development than a thoroughly explored character. Up until the last episode I think the writers gave her a distinct enough arc to avoid this pitfall, but depending on her ultimate fate (in a theoretical season 2) I could change my mind.

Tone:  The tone is dark, tense, and constantly on the verge of slipping into chaos. Hallucinatory sequences play out as Ji Soo and Gyu-ri imagine themselves killing people, destroying things, or being buried alive. These sequences emphasize the character's instability, while also establishing the camera as an unreliable narrator of events in a way that pays off in the ambiguous final moments. The fantastic acting is buoyed by the directing to depict the precarious state of the leads' minds as their situation spirals further out of their control. Ji Soo's scenes feel claustrophobic and paralyzing--when he ventures out of his apartment to talk to Gyu-ri or to go to the café you get the blinking, shuffling sense of something emerging from a cave. Gyu-ri, on the other hand, is a loose cannon, and her scenes have a jittery, dangerous edge to them. As a whole, the show is excruciatingly tense and frustratingly unresolved.

Theme:  This show is a full-fledged tragedy. It is a brilliant example of a negative change arc, with all of the characters taking more and more drastic actions while still managing to retain our loyalty. I think the writer's are clear that although none of these kids have made good choices, the real tragedy lies in how they have been abandoned, used, or neglected by the adults in their lives. The few adults who show any care for them are either relatively powerless themselves (like Mr. Lee and their teacher) or too late to avert disaster (like the prosecutor). Extracurricular is a grim look at how we fail vulnerable children to the point that even a boring, average life seems like an impossible dream.