#doing the stupidest dance right now THIS IS THE BEST I COULD DREAM | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

issaxcharlie · 4 years ago

Text

Spectacular!

Pairing: Alive! Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

Summary: Inspired by Nickelodeon’s Spectacular! Luke Patterson needs the money for his bands demo, and miraculously, that same night he gets an offer to fix his problem. The catch? Rockstar boy has to join his school’s show choir and put up with their fearless Female Lead Singer. (don’t come here searching for accuracy remember it’s inspired by a movie)

Note: I had a lot of fun with this one, hope you like it! Oh and it’s a little long so keep it in mind +8k👀💜

Say this is not her scene would be to fall short, but she has to make sacrifices to find greatness. The first thing she notices when she walks into the little club, is that it's packed. The people look excited and somewhat desperate and she doesn't blame them. The pamphlet marked they were supposed to start at 8:00 p.m. and it's already 8:40. She makes her way carefully until she finds a perfect place in the middle of the room.

The musicians take the stage visibly anxious, especially Alex who cannot stop moving his hands trying to probably calm himself down. Reggie and the rhythm guitarist take their positions. They look at each other one last time before beginning to play the enveloping sound of the pop-rock song. The bass line sounds insane and she hasn't heard Alex play drums in years, he’s exceptional. They could both play without their singer all night and she wouldn't mind.

The space in the center of the stage that belongs to who she came to see today, completely empty. The bassist seems about to take the first verse when Sunset Curve lead guitarist and vocalist Luke Patterson appears on stage.

She has seen him multiple times in the hallways laughing with her childhood best friend, Alex Mercer and her lab partner, Reggie Peters, but she has never spoken directly to him. Still, it's hard not to notice how handsome he is and how much of a charismatic personality he has.

“I'm living my life just the way I like, they say I get a little too loud. Try to push me in a box, over analyze. But I'm never gunna turn it down”

His voice is enchanting and mesmerizing, a sound that immediately reminds her of the best rockers in history and his movements and energy are electrifying. In seconds the entire audience is jumping and dancing to the beat.

“They say never and I say right now!” Y/N analyzes him excitedly. The passion with which he sings and plays his guitar reminds her of when she is on stage, although the two of them dedicate themselves to totally different things, their love for music is the same. She definitely has a lot of work to do to polish him and make him the perfect performer she needs, but if there's anyone who can accomplish the impossible, it's her.

“No one's gonna stop me tonight! Thank you, we are Sunset Curve, tell your friends!” The presentation ends and Sunset Curve leaves the stage. The girl moves quickly to catch up with them at the back of the club, but when she finally arrives, screams can be heard from two of the members of the band.

“I know you don’t like me, Bobby. But trying to sabotage the show by giving me the wrong time is just the most stupidest thing you've ever done!” The guitarist looks furious, his muscles are really tense and Y/N can't help staring at his biceps way more than she probably should.

"This fight of egos between the two of you has to stop, we can no longer continue to be in the middle." The bassist cries out, tired of all the bickering.

“You no longer have to, Reggie. It’s time to decide. The lousy rocker or me. Remember that the money for the demo is mine before choosing... I'm not sure Patterson's lyrics can compete without the money to record them.”

The guitarist looks down at the ground, a mixture of anger and sadness on his face. Alex and Reggie turn to see each other for a second and then position themselves on either side of Luke, no sign of doubt on their faces.

“We’ll find a way without you. Let’s see If you find one without us.” Reggie declared with a little smirk. Bobby grabs his stuff and gets into his truck without looking back, completely furious.

"Some things Bobby was angry about are true and you have to improve them. You are not a solo artist, you are part of a band." Alex points to Luke as soon as the truck is out of sight, but before he can respond the blonde intercepts the girl at the door.

“Y/N?” The three of them turn to see her, Reggie smiles at her while Luke looks pissed off.

“Hey guys, I came to talk to Luke.” Luke frowns in surprise while the other two gape for a few seconds.

"Really?” Y/N turns with a murderous face towards her friend, who puts his hands in his pockets and begins to walk. “...Okay. Meanwhile Reg and I are going to figure out how to get the drums in Luke's car."

"If you come for an autograph please be quick, I don't feel like socializing." The guitarist declares to the wind, not wanting to pay attention to the stranger who approaches him in the middle of the alley, no matter how cute she looks.

“I’m not a fan.” She confesses in a firm voice, trying to measure the situation.

"Oh, then I'll go. See you later beautiful." He's about to leave when her voice stops him.

“Patterson, come back here!” There's something about her tone that makes Luke suddenly interested. He turns to see her carefully, her chin is up, her shoulders back. Her lips are press together and her eyes look determined and he can't help but admit that the confidence she projects is really doing something to him.

“2 minutes, firecracker.”

“I’m Y/N Y/L.” Faced with no comment from the guitarist, she decides to continue. “I need a male lead singer for my group and I think you might be the perfect fit, after I'm done with you, of course."

He’s unable to believe what he hears. “A band? I think you know pretty well I'm already in one.”

“It’s not a band, it’s a group. THE group If I can say so myself. Spectacular!” She affirms with the first smile he sees her that night, and he can't believe it is possible that she can look even more beautiful.

"Don't you think you're exaggerating a bit with the spectacular thing? At least tell me the name or what kind of band is." She rolls her eyes and he chuckles in response, thinking it was adorable and hot at the same time.

“I already told you, Spectacular! It’s a show choir.”

“Is this a joke? Did Bobby sent you?”

“No and no. I know it’s not really your style, but I’m telling you I can make it work. I heard a bit of the conversation you had with the band, the prize of Nationals is 10,000 dollars. I'm willing to give you half for the demo, if we win, obviously. And I can assure you we will if you accept and do absolutely everything I say.”

“Firecracker, are you trying to tell me that all I have to do to raise the money is put on some stupid cowboy or tiger-print outfit and humiliate myself in front of an entire audience with my best jazz hands? Wow, sounds like a dream!” Maybe he got a bit too sarcastic, but meh, as pretty as she is, she's still a stranger.

“My name is Y/N, and I'm not appreciating your tone of voice.” By this moment the girl seems tired of the musician, who feels the frustration in her and tries to be more gentle.

“I- I’m sorry. Thanks for the offer, but I don't feel as desperate yet as to end my reputation in that way. I hope you find what you are looking for, but that’s just not me. I'm just a guitarist.” She nods, entwining her arms against her chest. He admires her for a few more seconds and turns to his car, where his friends are already waiting for him to help with the drums.

Before getting behind the wheel he turns to her one last time, but she is nowhere to be seen.

Fights between Luke and Bobby weren't new to the band. The big-headed attitude of both collided practically all the time and things had been getting worse in recent months with the more overconfident attitude of the guitarist, but they never imagined that they would end up in this situation.

The days go by and the boys are running out of time. They have to deliver the demo to the Orpheum offices in two months so that they can be taken into account for the great concert they will hold at the end of the year presenting the best new talents in the city. All they've heard from Bobby is that he's trying to build his own band but without much success. Still, he doesn’t fold his hands and continues to try on his own.

The three remaining members of Sunset Curve are in Alex's room lying on the floor with their instruments around trying to think of solutions, when Y/N's voice coming from outside refreshes the blonde's memory. “What did Y/N want to talk to you the other day?”

“Who?” Luke narrows his eyes in confusion.

“Y/N? The captain of the school’s show choir? She went to talk to you after Bobby left the band. Small, fire in her eyes, a lot of attitude.”

“OH, Firecracker! So that group is our school's choir? that's even worse. She tried to recruit me, even offered me the money for the demo if we win the competition in which they will participate.”

“What? She wants you in Spectacular? What did you said?” Alex heard that his friend's ex-boyfriend broke up with her and joined last year's national champions, but he never imagined that she would try to replace him with someone like Luke. Luke is distracted by a melody and doesn’t answer his friend's question.

"Why does your mom always leave her music on when she leaves to work?" The music is definitely not his style, they are always usually pop songs or even songs from musicals, but the singer's voice is one of the most beautiful he has ever heard so it never bothers him.

“It’s not her music, is Y/N.” Alex responds, wondering what the young woman is up to since she is never usually home at this hour.

“Who?” Alex's eyes widen, not able to believe his friend.

“Really? I already told you!” The guitarist tilts his head and shrugs. “Firecracker?”

“What does firecracker have to do with this?” Alex opens his balcony curtains and the silhouette of a young woman singing and dancing through her transparent pink ones comes to their visions.

“She’s so good bro, I thought it was a record too.” Reggie looks at her with a big smile as Alex rolls his eyes at Luke.

As soon as he sees her, the musician is in a trance, admiring the grace and energy with which she moves, wanting with all his might to remove the pink curtain that does not allow him to see her properly.

The song ends and a well-known melody begins to play with prominent bass and drums. “Guys, shut up! I’m trying to hear her sing.”

“It’s not us, man.” Reggie answers almost screaming with how loud the girl’s music is.

“What do you-” Luke turns around and sees his friends with their hands raised, the cables finally connecting in his brain. "She is listening our song?"

"Not just listening, she's also destroying your career, her vocals are amazing." The black-haired boy adds, smirking and running to connect his bass.

Luke excitedly opens the balcony window and sings the pre-chorus as loud as he can to get the singer's attention. “Call me in the morning to apologize, every little lie gives me butterflies.” She immediately turns around and smiles at the guitarist's cocky smile. She opens the curtain and the window and her sunset curve t-shirt is the first thing the band notices.

“Something in the way you're looking through my eyes, don't know if I'm gonna make it out alive.” Luke sings seductively towards her, each word fully dedicated to the woman in front of him.

Reggie accompanies them with his bass while Alex looks at his friends incredulously, an "Are you fucking kidding me." Comes out of the blonde almost like a whisper when he identifies the shirt that the girl wears as his.

Both sing the chorus together and the chemistry is unquestionable. Alex had never thought of this two together because at first glance they seem completely different, but thinking about it a little more deeply they couldn't be more similar. They are both passionate, headstrong, live for the stage, and are ridiculously talented and confident.

“Fight so dirty, but you love so sweet. Talk so pretty, but your heart got teeth. Late night devil, put your hands on me. And never, never, never ever let go.”

The performance between the duo is playful, driving, sexy and intense and Alex and Reggie can't help but feel like they're interrupting a private moment. As soon as the song ends, the girl moves closer to the window, blows them a kiss and closes it.

"Where did that woman come from?" Luke whispers as he tries to catch his breath. Nobody had enchanted him so much just by singing, well, nobody had enchanted him, period. But she’s definitely something.

“She has been my neighbor since we were 6 years old, we used to be best friends but we both drifted apart when we entered high school. She’s amazing, the best performer in the city.” Alex informs him and then Reggie adds his own piece of valuable information. “She’s my lab partner. Fun, smart, beautiful, the whole deal. A true gem.”

“Answering your question, I said no to her offer. But I guess the group of someone this rad can't be that bad. And we really need the money." The drummer purses his lips and nods. His friend definitely took the hook.

"Honestly, I always wanted to audition, I guess the three of us could try in, to support you obviously."

“Of course man, she sounded desperate when she asked, and if the shirt and song is any indication she is definitely a huge Sunset Curve fan. She tried to fool me by saying she wasn't a groupie, as if that was possible after seeing us perform.”

His friends leave the house and Alex plays on the drums the secret signal he had with the girl when they were younger, a minute later the girl appears in her window with an amusing smile, dressed in her classic blue pajamas.

“Really?” The drummer chuckled and his friend’s smile grows even bigger, a little laugh leaving her lips. “The shirt was a nice touch. A little much, but that idiot must have fallen for it completely. I want it back by the way.”

“You can see right through me. You know the invitation is open, right? I would love nothing more than to have you there.” He has known her his whole life, and realized early on that she was just trying to get his friend's attention to reconsider her offer by raising his ego, and he honestly doesn't mind. It's about time Luke met someone of his caliber. Perhaps her influence could do him good.

“I- thank you. I guess we’ll see. See you tomorrow.” She blows him a kiss and closes the window. Tomorrow sure is going to be an interesting day, Sunset Curve joins Spectacular.

Having to face Spectacular! And telling them they still don't have a male lead singer who can compete against Damian was not easy. Her options are running out and she honestly doesn't know what to do to save them.

Damian on stage is the best, it pains her to admit that she has never seen anyone like him. At first she thought she could continue without him, but it’s becoming increasingly obvious that he is just impossible to replace.

Everyone continues to practice the routine, clearly discouraged after her bad news and it honestly breaks her heart. She knows how much the group means to everyone for different and personal reasons and she can't let them lose this. So whatever she has to do, she’ll do it so they can have the leader they deserve.

“I thought the children in the choir would have more energy, this is just sad, firecracker.” She hides her wide smile before turning to the owner of the voice, who is entering the auditorium with his best friends. Money really talks, otherwise she can't explain what would make him appear here.

“Dude, can you please play nice? This is important!” Reggie looks flustered and scolds Luke probably louder than he planned. The guitarist just ignores him and winks shamelessly at her. Seems her little plan from yesterday was successful, now she just has to play the situation in her favor.

“Mercer, Peters... Patterson. Can we help you with something?” The performer shows a perfect poker face, Spectacular continues to practice but they can't help but turn their attention to the rock band.

“I came to accept your proposal, but only If we can include Reggie and Alex in the deal. I guess as long as I’m in whatever I ask shouldn't be a problem." He crosses his arms and gives her a confident smile.

“I could actually do with a few more members, specially as talented as Reg and Alex. As for you, you've already turned down my offer Lucas, but if for some reason you don't graduate this year, make sure you audition the next one. Now, let’s start boys." Y/N moves within inches of Luke to gently close his open mouth with her index finger, and gives him a small wink before turning and taking the other two musicians each on each arm and pulling them closer to where the group is still practicing.

“Y/N, you can’t be serious.” The skilled singer continues to ignore him as she explains to her new members something Luke can't quite hear.

The musician frustrates and walks until he is directly in front of her. “Y/N” He groans.

“I'm not firecracker anymore? That is just sad.” Luke looks upset, but she's determined to not let him have what he wants after what he said at the club, so if he wants the money that bad he's going to have to prove it.

“I’m going to explain you something quickly so you can go and stop wasting my time. I’ve seen your band play, I know how good these two are at singing, which means I don't need you anymore, nor do I have to put up with your rockstar wannabee attitude. I need someone that I can connect with and have the chemistry that leaves everyone forgetting how to breathe, and after yesterday, I just don't think that's you.” Right now she is grateful to be such a good actress because yesterday's act melted her legs, even though they were separated by the balconies. This man is unreal, totally unfair.

"I do, I wouldn't be surprised if they kissed at any moment." The bassist whispers as Alex looks at him with an incredulous face, he just slowly shakes his head from side to side and continues to see the leader of their band and their new leader in a starting contest, is kind of an amusing sight since Luke is definitely not used to having to face someone like him.

“It’s like you said, you are just a guitarist. Thinking you could handle something like this was ridiculous of me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a group to direct."

Y/N hopes she hasn't pushed the rockstar too much, but remains firm in her tactics and turns to the others to continue with the rehearsal. She signals them to put the most similar song to the Sunset Curve sound that she can remember at the moment to make Alex and Reggie feel more calm and to see if she finishes catching Luke’s interest, who still doesn’t move from where he is with his eyes fixed on her, which she takes as as a good sign.

The moment the song start, both sunset curve members smile, and Luke's voice is heard from behind. “So you're the girl, I heard the rumor.” He sounds powerful and captivating and immediately sets everyone's eyes on him. She doesn’t give him the luxury of turning to see him, but he is not going to give up and in a quick and agile movement he turns her by the hand.

“Why don't you break my heart, make it hurt so bad. Come on give it your best, nothing less, I insist, I want it just like that.” The girl should have thought more about her choice before asking for a song like this. Every word that comes out of the musician's mouth is addressed directly to her with an intensity in his eyes and movements that should be illegal.

She tries to get out of his way but he makes it pretty clear that he's not singing to prove himself to the group, he's doing it to prove something to her. Specifically, to prove her wrong.

“Stare me down, intimidate me. Oh baby please you'll never break me.” He comes dangerously close to her, basically inches apart, his eyes fixed on her lips and smiling flirtatiously as he sings, his eyes glinting mischievously.

She enters the song so as not to make him feel like she’s defeated and starts dancing with him to the rhythm, their movements matching effortlessly as they move across the stage.

She pulls herself back as far as she can, but Luke surprises everyone by doing a body roll on the floor, his arms looking more gorgeous than ever in that sleeveless shirt as they take the full weight of his body without any problem, his eyes never losing contact with hers. All the girls start to do small screams while Y/N's cheeks turn red at her thoughts. He slides on his knees towards her and gets up as he puts his foot on her to make her lose balance and catch her right at the end of the song.

“Why don’t you break my heart.” They've been in a trance since the song started and it's like it's just the two of them in the auditorium. Their lips are almost touching, neither willing to give up eye contact or move from their current position, until the applause and shouts of excitement bring them back to reality.

“I have chemistry with everybody that I sing with, firecracker.” He whispers to her lips before shifting the girl's full weight to his right arm to raise his left one to her face and carefully close her mouth with his finger, winking with a cocky smile before lifting her up.

Immediately everyone begins to advocate for him with all kinds of arguments that ranged from how sensual he was to how much of a presence he had on stage. Her best friend’s comment is the one that catches his attention the most. "You have even more chemistry with him than Damian, I didn't think it was possible." That definitely sounds interesting.

Y/N pretends to listen to her teammates before saying Luke can enter the group. The truth is that she knew from the first moment she saw him perform with Sunset Curve that he was a star, but this facet without the guitar and irradiating passion from his pores was something that left her speechless.

Still, she knew all the work that would go into preparing the band and it really was exhausting. For them to understand that they couldn't just sing like they do at the club, that there are rules to follow, dance steps they have to learn, facial expressions they have to master, notes they have to hit perfectly, wasn’t easy but they succeeded.

Along the way, she regained her bond with Alexander, her friendship with Reggie grew stronger, and each day she felt closer to Luke. She has been practicing a duet with him for weeks now, and the chemistry that they have set to burn the stage more than once. It was hard for her to ignore how the guitarist's hands feel on her thighs as he lifts her or the way he wraps himself around her, breathing softly down her neck or brushing his lips teasingly over her cheekbone. Both are very physical to show affection so small contacts such as hugs or caresses, as well as small kisses on the cheek or hand were very recurrent. They had also gone out multiple times alone and with their friends, from the cinema, the park, to see them play, to small parties at home, to midnight talks.

Reggie was the one who had her alone the most because they were lab partners, but no matter how hard the bassist tried to get information from the girl, he never succeeded. The truth is that not even she knows what is happening with the guitarist, she is for the first time in her life letting herself be carried away and enjoying the moment, and she’s loving it.

Luke and Alex are in detention after the brown haired boy made a mess in the classroom by putting together a little concert with the help of the blonde, and as they die of boredom, his mind can’t help to go to her for the 14th time of the day. "How did she end up in the show choir?"

Alex is blank for a few seconds but analyzes the question and realizes who they are talking about. “Spectacular used to be the most important show choir in the country, led by her mother, may she rest in peace. Y/N always wanted to be a part of it and when she lost her, it became a goal. She suffered a lot to get to the perfect star we see today, especially because her father is rarely there since he works outside the country. She has practically had to face alone auditions, injuries, she had to learn to sew, comb her hair and put on makeup for the show, sing for hours her solos with no one to encourage her, without mention that the current director could not care less about the group and practically leaves all the work to her. That’s why she’s so be fearless, she kind of has to."

“I didn’t know.” The sight of Y/N as happy as ever with his mother when he took her home for lunch the week before appears in his memory. She looked radiant as she ate his mother's famous stew and listened to stories of little Luke as he gently stroked her thigh while songwriting with his other hand. When was the last time she got to experience something as homelike as that? Luke probably doesn’t want to know.

Alex's sad voice brings him back to the conversation.“I was supposed to be there, you know? At first I was. We were going to audition for Spectacular together, but that summer I met you and Sunset Curve was born, and I didn’t have the time anymore so I abandoned her. I knew how important it was for her to have me there, and I didn't even go to her audition. And do you know how many times she has reproached me? Not even one.”

Luke knows that Alex would never hurt her on purpose and that the situation was probably much more complicated than he expresses it, so he reassures him and lets him know that she loves him and is proud that he took his own path. As soon as the blonde calms down, he begins to tell him multiple stories about when he and the girl were kids, the songwriter takes out his journal and begins to add lyrics to the song he has been working on, more inspired than ever.

“You are falling so deeply for her, man. I’m happy for you both.” His friend comments to him while reading the verses written on the paper. He totally is.

“Bowling, nice. I'm going to finish you off, Patterson.”

“As sexy as your confidence sounds, I'm not going to let you win.”

“I'm pretty sure you've never gone bowling.” Alex adds with furrowed eyebrows.

“Your point is, Mercer?” She wrinkles her nose and sticks out her tongue. Reggie chuckles amused.

"How can you be so sure that you are going to win?"

“Oh, my dear cute blonde. I’m good at everything.” She makes a slight remark on everything with her eyes fixed on the guitarist, who chokes while blushing.

She smiles cheekily at him and confidently steps into the room, Sunset Curve behind as Alex and Reggie tease Luke for being completely whipped.

Happiness doesn't last long when the first thing they see inside is Damian Miller along with a couple of his new teammates. The moment their eyes meet, Y/N seems to melt, but not in the good way.

Her firm and perfect posture now all bent as she embraces herself with her arms and tries with the strength that has left to hold her gaze at the person who took everything from her without much more than an empty sorry.

When she feels the guitarist at her side again, she unconsciously stretches her hand to intertwine her fingers with him, who tilts his head to see their hands together and then to see her face.

She is not doing it to make Damian jealous, but to feel supported. And when Luke realizes it, he can't help not feeling angry at the boy in from of them. In the month that he has been with her, he has never seen her doubt, fear, or believe anything less than that she is unstoppable. And today for the first time ever he sees her intimidaded, and the fact that it's because of a jerk like this makes it even worse.

He rubbs her hand to make her feel less anxious and when she turns to meet his eyes, he brings his index finger to her chin and winks at her, hoping she gets the message. She seems to do it because she immediately smiles playfully and begins to look more relaxed.

The guitarist is aware that Damian was his firecracker's first boyfriend, and he also knows how much he betrayed her love and trust. No matter how strong the woman is, her reaction is completely normal and valid, and that she has the confidence to be vulnerable and let him be there for her means a lot to him.

“Princess.” Damian whispers as he moves closer to her, his eyes fixed on Y/N and Luke's clasped hands.

“I’m not your princess, Y/L is just fine. Listen, Damian. I could pretend this is not uncomfortable and boring but, I don't want to. So yeah, excuse us.”

She pulls the hand that joins her to Luke to make him walk and Alex and Reggie follow behind them, looking at her ex boyfriend with little smiles of pride. Alex knows how much Damian turned off Y/N’s spark and seeing her put him in his place makes him feel so proud.

"So someone is going to teach me bowling or what?"

“I’ll do it baby, but another day. Today we came here with a different purpose.” Luke points to the large Rock the World machine located in a comfortable corner space.

“Of course, is always about music with you, eh Patterson?” She smirks, getting a little closer to him.

“Pretty much, but I can tell that attracts you, Y/L.” He wrinkles his nose, his lips parting slightly.

“Hell yeah it does.” he smirks, not at all expecting her to admit it so openly but he definitely should have seen it coming.

“Good thing I’m into dominant firecrackers then.”

“Could you stop flirting for a second and start playing? I have plans to destroy Alex and your daily session of sexual tension is not going to ruin it.”

Both smile at Reggie while Y/N takes the games microphone and Luke the guitar. The song that Y/N chooses is She’s so gone by Naomi Scott, and it goes without saying that the boys have never played it in their lives but they love a challenge.

The mastery with which the girl interprets the song makes a good number of people come to see the round, including her ex-boyfriend and his new friends.

“Here I am, this is me, and I'm stronger than you ever thought I'd be. Are you shocked? Are you mad? That you're missing out on who I really am.”

The singer sings the verse directly towards Damian, as his friends start pointing out and teasing him. Reggie goes over to tell Luke he thought he would join her, but the guitarist only replies, "I want to see her shine."

She gets carried away with the music and draws Luke to her, jumping and twirling to the beat of the music. The guitarist hyping her up every single second og the song. At the end the night was incredible, the four of them spent it singing, dancing and even bowling, which Y/N ended up dominating from the second round.

Luke thought that there would be no better time than that night to show her what he had been working on, so after saying goodbye to her he went to Alex’s where he had left his journal.

Before he can say goodbye to the blond, screams are heard from the house next door. “I wasn't trying to embarrass you, Damian!”

“No? So what were you doing shaking your hips against the rock boy?”

“I don't have to explain anything to you, but I think it's pretty obvious why I wanted to be against that body, have you seen it?” She says it playfully with her eyes fixed on the guitarist, who is walking with the blonde to her door, her eyes glinting wickedly in the dark. He chuckles, knowing it's the girl's way of reassure him and she smiles as she sees his expressions relax.

“Everything alright, firecracker?” Luke does not stand in front of her like a brave prince, he stops a meter from both of them and asks before intervening, and that makes her heart melt. Because he wants to hear her first, he trusts that she can take care of it and has the confidence to tell him if she needs help, which is also completely valid. And it's something she has to work on, know that there are also times when it's okay to trust someone. That you don't always have to carry the weight alone.

“Go away, punk. My girl and I are in the middle of something.” The three of them start laughing at the ex-boyfriend's intimidation attempt, who seems to get angrier with every laugh that comes out of their mouths.

“I’m fine baby, but you guys could show him the way out? I’m tired of his bullshit.” She asks the boy with a cute smile, and he would disintegrate over the nickname if her horrible ex-boyfriend and her best friend weren't there.

"Don't touch me, I’ll go. Right now the numbers are not working in my favor so we will fix this where it really matters, on stage. Let's see if this attempt at a singer can save you from total humiliation, because let's be honest Y/N, you are nothing without me."

The faces of both members of Sunset Curve begin to tense, Luke's fists completely white from how much he's clenching them. For her part, the singer, who is already used to that type of comments from her ex-boyfriend, only tells him "yes, yes, you're right. It was a pleasure Dami, never come back." while pushing him to the other side to make him go away.

The nickname comes off her tongue in the most natural way in the world, she doesn't even seem to notice it and Luke feels some annoyance hearing it. As if someone had hit him in the stomach. But immediately the discomfort goes away when the girl turns to them again with a big smile and runs to hug them excitedly.

“Thanks for coming to check me out, guys. Things can sometimes get out of control with him.”

"We will always be there for you when you need us, okay? I actually went into Alex's house to get something I wanted to show you but it's late, I’ll come back tomorrow." The blonde turns from his friend to the other, a tired smile appears on his lips as he passes Luke his journal to place his arm on his childhood friend and lean on her.

"No, don't go please. Damian was pretty mad and... I don't want to be alone." She can be very dramatic at times but the fear in her voice sounds sincere, and remembering the scream that brought them outside in the first place Alex imagines how scared she really was before seeing them show up and his heart clenches at the thought.

“O- Okay, sure.” He sounds nervous but the excitement is evident in the way his left leg keeps moving, just like when he's on stage.

“I do have to go in, you already know mom. Will you be alright with just Luke?” He already knows the answer from the girl's radiant gaze but it doesn't hurt to confirm. She hugs him tightly with her arms around his neck and whispers a "Yes, I love you but go away already." which makes the drummer laugh out loud while high-fiving his other friend goodbye.

The third wheel enters his house and finally they are alone. She smiles and takes him by the hand to enter the house. Luke takes a moment to admire it, everything is in place but there are several instruments throughout the living room. A keyboard on the couch, a guitar next to the TV, even a tambourine on the table.

"May l?" He walks over to the guitar and turns to see the girl nodding and pointing up the stairs for him to follow. Her room is quite similar to her style, white is the predominant color but there are many details in pink and gold, as well as multiple yellow lights giving a romantic tone to the room at midnight.

“Do you want to show me now?” she asks eagearly, with joined hands, closed eyes and pursed lips.

“Y- yeah... of course.” He sits on the rug and puts the guitar aside, then puts his notebook between his legs and when he finds the sheet he is looking for, he carefully tears it off. The girl looks at him adoringly, the happiness of having him with her making her heart beat louder in her chest. She sits across from him making sure to brush his legs and waits for him to speak.

“Here.” He looks nervous, his cheeks totally flushed as he avoids eye contact for the first time since they met.

Y/N takes the sheet in his hands and a huge warm smile appears on her face when he sees the guitarist's terrible lyrics. BRIGHT written and highlighted several times in the title.

“It’s for you.” Luke whispers while bringing his face closer to hers, making her shiver.

“You wrote me a song?” She doesn't know what to say. Since her mom, no one had done anything so beautiful, considerate, and selfless for her. Something so vulnerable and full of love.

“Don’t be mad, but Alex told me a little about how you ended up in show choir, your friendship with him, your mom.” He turns to see her looking for her reaction, she just nods to tell him it’s okay to continue. “A sweet story about a little girl with the voice of an angel who loved to sing love songs. And you know what was in my head all that night? That even though I've never written one, I would write millions of love songs for you.”

Some tears fall from the girl's face, she carefully places the lyrics on the guitar and throws herself on the guitarist, who falls in surprise against the carpet, making sure to grab her by the waist so that she falls safely on his chest. She rests her arms on either side of his head and brings her lips against Luke's, brushing them gently.

Luke doesn't move a muscle, not wanting to do something to make her uncomfortable, when he suddenly hears her talk. “And what about teeth? I mean is not the sweetest love story ever told but-”

The boy chuckles, Y/N's curious eyes a few inches away. “Alex wrote that one after his first breakup, Reggie and I did the melody.”

“Good. Guess we’ll have to start making some experiences to help you write all that songs.” At that moment she finally pushes her lips against his, both in a moment of euphoria at the taste of each other. She presses her body against him and he bites lightly with his teeth on her lower lip to shove his tongue against her mouth in response. Her little hands pulling his hair hard as his hands go down her butt. Both of them enjoying what they had been dreaming of for so long.

When the two finally separate they fall in a comfortable silence, she starts to admire his facial features, delicately running her fingers through his nose, his mouth, his cheekbones, until he interrumpts her. “I knew you want me from the beginning, I could see the lust in your eyes. Everything about the choir was a complex plan to get me under you.” Luke affirms with his best poker face, and sees clearly how her eyes fill with light while a pure laugh escapes from her now swollen lips.

“And as always, I achieved the goal. The hot local rockstar is sleeping on my bed tonight.” No matter how hard he tries, he can never catch her off guard and he always ends up being the one blushing. She kisses him softly before getting up and taking the song lyrics back. “Luke, do you mind if I sing a bit of the song?”

“Of course not, it's yours. I will accompany you with the guitar, from the pre-choir?”

She nods and begins to sing the words he wrote for her. “Life is a risk but I will take it, close my eyes and jump. Together I think that we can make it, come on, let's run.”

She is reading the choir as she sings and the urge to cry reappears. He's basically telling her that she no longer has to go on living life alone, that she can lean on him, she can trust him to fight by her side. That it can be us instead of I.

“And rise through the night, you and I, we will fight to shine together. Bright forever.”

As soon as they finish singing Luke puts the guitar aside and goes over to wipe the tears from the girl's face. “I know that at first glance it doesn't seem like a love song, but..."

“But it is. It’s perfect, thank you Luke.” She didn't know that someone other than her could make her feel so special, but he proved her wrong, again.

The night before was like a dream. Y/N sleeping with his shirt while he wrapped her completely in his arms, singing softly in her ear and leaving little kisses on her neck every few verses until she fell asleep. At this point there is no way to deny how completely in love he is with her.

“Man, we need to talk.” His blonde friend wakes him up from his daydream and starts pulling him down the hall to an empty table in the cafeteria, where Reggie is already waiting for them.

They both sit down and Alex takes a deep breath as he plays with his fingers, trying to form coherent sentences with the words in his head. “Bobby called last night.” Luke's gaze instantly shifted to disgust, while Reggie looks quite shocked.

“So? What did he want?” Luke whispers, trying to sound disinterested.

“He sent some of our videos to an important person at Destiny Management and they are interested in the band. He said that if we comply with certain requests he will give the money for us to record the demo this Friday so that it’s ready for the appointment."

“And I guess you told him we don't need him or his money. What did he answer you? He cried?" the guitarist asks with an amused face, but his friends just look at each other.

“Don't you think we should think more about it? What happens if we don't win nationals? We’ll have lost something as sure as Bobby's deal for nothing."

“She’s my friend and I love her but I have to agree, Luke. As difficult as it is, our priority has to be Sunset Curve, not Spectacular"

“But-”

“They are right, Luke.” All three look at the girl, as pale as If they had seen a ghost. “Spectacular is my dream, And I know I'd do anything for it. It would be unfair of me to get angry because you’re fighting for yours. Don't hesitate, if anyone can find a way out of this it's me.”

“But, the duet...”

“I’ll just have to be the melody and the words. I’ll be fine, and honestly I'm so proud of you guys, I know you will be rock legends one day.” All three feel guilty but don't know what to say or do to make it right. She goes over to hug the drummer and the bassist who take her in their arms with all their strength, a “I’m so sorry” from the blonde accompanied by an “I know” from the girl can be heard. Then she stands in front of the guitarist and kisses his lips intensely, but breaking away painfully fast. The guys leave lovers alone for a moment of privacy.

“I believe in you, baby. You are destined to be a star, forget everything else, even me. Take the moment and knock them off their feet.” She kisses him lightly on the lips and walks a few steps back. “This month was the happiest of my life in a long time, thank you. Guess I’ll see you guys around.”

“Why do you sound like you are saying goodbye? And a horrible one? I thought you were good at everything.” Luke walks over to her again and places his hands on her cheeks, rubbing them gently. His voice is shaky and his eyes are glassy, she snorts at his sudden taunt, a little smile covered with the tears.

“Once everyone gets back to their own business, do you think you'll still have time for me? Alex is my damn neighbor, and we couldn't keep in touch.” And Luke gets it. She is used to being alone, to people not being permanent in her life. Neither her parents, nor her best friend, nor her boyfriend, nor anyone else has stayed. So this time to protect herself she decided that he too was going to leave, that it would be foolish to think that he of all possible people would stay.

“I‘m not letting you go baby, you're the only one I would let to boss me around.” The girl laughs when she remembers the millions of times she had to correct him and how he always ended up making her blush in some way, especially when they danced. She can't remember telling him but dancing with him has been the most special thing she has ever experienced. She danced with Damian for years and it never felt like the first time Luke put her long, strong hands on her waist and pulled her close to him. She can only hope to feel that way again one day.

“You are my one and only, firecracker. We’ll find a way, neither of us is a quitter.”

They say that actions are worth a thousand words, and Luke had definitely missed his first chance to show Y/N that he was serious about them by not getting in time to wish her good luck before she left with the group to the city of the competition, a few hours from there. He couldn't help but feel more miserable when he returned to the studio and found a small yellow sheet in his journal.

“You got this, rockstar. I have so much faith in you, so go make me proud. And I don’t want you feeling guilty, okay? I always want to see you shine, baby, no matter what. Your firecracker, Y/N.” Luke laughs softly, dazzled by her attempt to be sweet. If she trusts him so much, why doesn't he return the favor? She assured him they could win and when she says something, she follows through.

Why ruin his life with all of Bobby's ridiculous demands while ditching his girl in the process when he can go sing with her and do band things their way, without selling their soul to the devil. He sits on the couch thinking about what to say to the boys when they both rush in and pick him up, one from his feet and the other from his arms.

“What the hell are you two planning this time?” Luke sounds annoyed but does nothing to stop them from moving him, they throw him into the back of the car and he hits his head, getting him to kick them before they close the door.

"I'm not going to let her down again, I can’t."

"Yeah, and surely we can win, the number is spectacular... do you understand what I did there?”

Alex rolls his eyes and Luke smiles. They drive at full speed to Luke’s for him to take all his things and when he returns to the car, stands thoughtfully by the window.

“What are you doing?!” Alex is not having it, looks like a vein is going to burst from stress any second now.

“Do you think we’ll make it?” Questioned the guitarist, clearly nervous.

“If you stop asking stupid as fuck questions and get in the car, maybe.” Luke pouts but listens and finishes loading everything in the trunk.

The road is full of music to try to calm all the nerves, there was also plenty of time to rehearse the number over and over again, Luke analyzing in his mind every move he had to make, from time to time his bossy girl correcting him in his head. The only difficult thing was probably changing into the costumes, especially for Alex.

They arrive directly to register and the band turns pale when they hear the powerful and breathtaking voice of the singer who is playing her solo right now, a heavenly version of 'Never enough’. By the time they are ready to go, the main number has already started, the imposing woman in the very center of the stage with one of the boys of the group, who although does not have the voice of the guitarist, is making a good effort. Damian is on the other side, staring at her with a superiority smirk and Luke can't help but want to punch him.

“I never realized how anyone could make everything so right, I was so sad, you brought me back.” Alex quickly indicates to him how to enter the stage from the back, and Luke prepares to jump in time for the chorus, taking care of not being seen as he climbs the platform. The song is an old pop-rock song from the 80s, specifically chosen to make the guitarist's voice shine. He and his firecracker sat listening to music for hours until they finally found it, the girl's eyes shining with excitement as she imagined all she could do with the potential of the melody.

“You give me something to believe in, after all that we've been through.” He appears on the platform just in time, the lights and smoke coming out right in his grand entrance. Y/N turns immediately upon hearing her voice and he dances his way towards her.

“The love you give, it all comes back to you. You give me something to believe in, you can see the real me. And here with you is where I'm meant to be.” both singing together the remainder of the chorus and dancing to the beat. The biggest smile he has seen in his girl since he met her on her beautiful face. With that he feels satisfied with his decision, whatever happens, win or lose, it was worth it.

“And here we are together side by side, and nothing seems impossible tonight.” the duet between them is electrifying as always, he puts his hands on her thighs and lifts her with ease, both of them moving and enjoying themselves as if they were the only ones in the place. The dance ends as the first time they danced in the auditorium when he showed her that he was the right option, he holds her with one arm, their lips inches from touching but holding the magnetism back for a few more seconds until finally leave the stage.

As soon as they are backstage Y/N throws herself at Luke, wrapping her legs around his hips and devouring his lips with hers. “Someone missed me.” Luke whispers catching his breath.

"I can't believe you guys did this for me." Expressed the girl as she turns to see her other two friends, still wrapped around Luke who has her tightly held with his huge arms around her butt.

“We trust you as much as you trust us. We know that you will win, you worked like nobody for this moment.” Affirmed the blonde, giving her a small kiss on the forehead.

“I feel like I won already.” And she did. She won the trophy, the money for the demo, friends, and a ridiculously gorgeous rockstar who drove her crazy in more ways than one. All this years working hard were finally worth it... and Damian throwing a tantrum in the middle of the stage felt good too, not gonna lie.

“When are you going to ask me to be your boyfriend? As much as I love you more than anything, a man has to have some pride, you know? We've been together for like 5 months and I'm getting desperate.” They are both lying together on the girl's bed, their legs intertwined as he makes little circles with his fingers on his girl's stomach.

She raises her head resting her hand on his bare chest, her thoughts impossible to read. What are you talking about? I'm waiting for you to ask me!” He chuckles, prepared to tease her. “Bu-”she interrumpts him, pushing the hand that is resting on him to sit down. “Ba-”

“Wait a second, Lucas!” He bites his lip, he never liked being called by his name but for some reason it sounds incredibly sensual when she says it. “Yeah, baby?”

“D- did you say you love me?”

“I did, and I do. Everybody knows you've got me trapped in your claws.” He jokes to make her laugh, and he succeeds.

“I love you too, so much.”

“I know baby.” He winks teasingly at her. “Returning to the topic, you are the most bossy and confident person I have ever met, and you want to tell me that you were waiting for me to take the first step? Doesn’t sound like my firecracker. You literally pretended to be a sunset curve super fan to get my attention.”

"I totally did, I was awesome, first thing next day you were at the auditorium.” She says proud while Luke rolls his eyes with a smile. “But if it makes you feel better, I'm 100% a fan now, and...You are completely right, for once.”

She takes a deep breath, intertwining her fingers with his. “Lucas Patterson, I want you, if we're being honest, probably from the first time I saw you at that Sunset Curve gig we met at. You are annoying, cocky, passionate, and I love you with all my heart. Be my boyfriend... please.”

“There it is, that’s my girlfriend.” His eyes full of lust after hearing that she wanted him from the first night, he draws her closer to him to push his lips against hers, his girlfriend's tongue quickly dancing with his.

"Oh my god, we already talked about this, close the damn window, I don't want to hear it!” The blonde cries from his balcony, the couple can't help but laugh before joining their lips again.

Thank you for reading ✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning, @ghostofmgg @strangerthanfanfiction713 @thebloodthirstyvampress, @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc @luckylouiebug, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @txrii @tuttigunner @dpaccione @justalittleweirdoo @mrstodorooki @averyharrypotterlife

#luke patterson imagine #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson x y/n #luke jatp #luke patterson #luke patterson fanfic #luke patterson fic #luke patterson oneshot #luke patterson imagines #jatp imagine #jatp fanfic #charlie gillespie imagines #jatp one shot #jatp luke #charlie gillespie x y/n #charlie gillespie fic #charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie imagine

418 notes · View notes

harry-writings · 4 years ago

Text

Arrogant Son of a Bitch

- The one where Harry and Y/n are separated, but Harry gets jealous when he sees Y/n getting ready for a date with another man

Masterlist

It was the last thing Harry wanted to see, really — Y/n in a tight red dress, hooking gold earrings into her ears while she rubs her lips together, spreading the crimson lipstick upon the surface, legs ending at her black stilettos.

But that’s exactly what Harry sees when he walks into her apartment to pick up their six-month old son, and he’s never had so much of an urge to gouge his eyes out from their sockets and leave them lifeless upon the ground.

There’s someone else. Y/n’s dolling herself up, wearing her Sunday best, letting her hair down in loose curls even though she hates curling her fucking hair, for somebody else — for somebody that’s not him, for somebody that’s not her husband.

“Hey, Harry! Thank you so much for coming early. I don’t want to be late!”

She still has yet to look at him — still scrambling around her living room, gathering everything she needs — and Harry doesn’t even know if he wants her to. One glance from her when she looks like this... and he’ll be a goner, he knows it, and he can’t afford to get all jealous and possessive in front of the very woman he broke things off with not just one year ago.

It was his idea to file for divorce, at the end of it all. Y/n had tried everything she could to mend the marriage that was in constant shambles, but Harry was always too stubborn and too prideful to admit to all the things he’d done wrong. And he did everything wrong.

He didn’t treat Y/n with the kind of love he had once given her — with the kind of love she always deserved. He treated Y/n like an obligation rather than a choice, a burden rather than a need, yet she always kept her promises and lived by her vows because it wasn’t just a casual relationship that could be thrown away and forgotten about, it was marriage.

She signed them up for marriage counseling, but Harry failed to show up to half the meetings. And when he did, he’d just sit there with a scowl on his face saying that talking about their feelings wouldn’t help any because there were no feelings. She tried working around his schedule to go on getaway vacations together to respire their connection, but he always spent the portion of time he could have spent with her working on more of his music.

And when she got pregnant with his baby, Y/n was desperate and silently hoped that the little bundle of joy growing inside of her would help fix all that had been broken between them. But it was no avail. If anything, it only made them grow further apart. Perhaps it was because he felt more bound to her when he didn’t want to be with her at all.

He told her he wanted the divorce half-way through the six month mark of her pregnancy. She was big, she was struggling, and she was absolutely exhausted, yet Harry couldn’t find it in his heart to push it aside any longer. He needed to let her go.

But as Harry stands here, watching Y/n looking as gorgeous as ever for another man that isn’t even hers, makes him want to take back everything he had ever done.

And it’s not that he didn’t before — he’s wanted to take it back from the second he walked into their home with divorce papers in his hands, his pregnant wife sobbing on the kitchen counter, asking why it had to be this way — it just feels like a fresh wound on his already scarred and fragile heart, and he genuinely feels as if a part of him has died.

“You’re going on a date.” Harry says knowingly, his frown deepening in the corners of his lips. And he knows he has no right to feel the way he does — so upset and hurt, like his heart had been ripped in two — but he can’t help himself from falling apart.

At the end of the day, she’s still his wife. Sure, the divorce papers had been filed, but there was still so much that had to be done for their last final steps. But of course, just like everything else that involved Y/n, Harry didn’t make the time for it.

Y/n shrugs, her thumbs twiddling together with her head down, eyes casted at the ground beneath his feet.

It’s been a year since Harry brought the divorce papers home, and Y/n’s barely looked at him since. Sometimes he’s thankful she doesn’t, but sometimes, in times like these, he wishes she would… even if it’ll hurt.

“Yeah, I guess. Just some guy I met the other night at the grocery store. Couldn’t reach one of the cereals for Topher and saw me struggling. Guess he thought I was pretty or something and told me he wanted to take me out.”

“I didn’t ask.”

She knows she should have stopped herself from talking sooner, but being around Harry makes her head spin and her body disassociate from herself. She doesn’t ever know what to do, or what to say, whenever he’s around.

There’s a part of her that tries so desperately to act as if everything is normal — like nothing had ever happened — mainly for Topher’s sake. But the other part of her knows that that’s such an impossible thing to do no matter how hard she tries.

Y/n purses her lips, dropping her hands at her sides in defeat. “Right.”

And it’s not that Harry wants to talk to her this way — like he doesn’t care about her, like he can barely stand the sight of her anymore; it’s the farthest from the truth, really, he’s just utter shit at saying how he feels or what he’s thinking. He’ll lie, and lie, and lie — chew on the truth and spit it out if it means he doesn’t have to apologize.

And right now, that’s all he wants to do. He wants to break down and drown in his tears, hold her to him and tell her how sorry he is for everything he’s put her through. But he has this unexplainable, unsettling wall built around him that he can’t knock down no matter how hard he swings at it.

He curses his career for it, really. He wishes he could be one of the celebrities that says fame hasn’t gotten to his head, but it has. In the most selfish, most arrogant of ways, fame has made him so prideful that he never puts himself to blame for anything that happens in his life.

His mother was the first one to tell him, and still never fails to remind him now that the divorce has been put in place.

You never fight for anything in your life. She’d always say. You think you’re too good for your mistakes. Put your wife through hell, making your kid go through hell, all because you swallow the two words that could fix everything you’ve ever broken.

But he wants to fight for Y/n. Oh, how badly does he want to, but at this point, it’s just too late. All the damage had already been done, and no woman could ever forgive a man that left her during the nine months she needed the man she loves the most.

“Didn’t mean it like that, just —“ he croaks brokenly, gulping down the cries he doesn’t deserve to weep. “Does he know you’re married?”

The question makes her feel guilty — really guilty, the kind of guilty that makes her stomach swim with bile because nothing she does is ever going to feel right, for either of them. And she knows going on a date when the divorce hasn’t been set in stone is just making everything so much harder.

But what is she to do? Wait around for Harry to finally take the time out of his music to go to the courtroom so she could finally move on? She can’t keep being legally bound to a man that no longer loves her, she can’t keep doing this dance by herself because she’ll never have the heart to find somebody else.

And she just needs somebody else.

Because she’s still so deeply in love with Harry, it hurts. Everyday feels like the world is grabbing her at her feet, sucking her into its core until she’s floating in the midst of everybody’s life except her own. She’s living day by day stuck between the confines of marriage and separation and the worst part is, she feels not only separated from Harry, but also from herself.

It was so good. Everything about them was just so good… and Y/n doesn’t know what she had done wrong to make Harry fall out of love with her. But somewhere between their picture-perfect relationship hid an unbearable amount of blame being put onto Y/n for things that weren’t her fault, or her responsibility, or her obligations.

The stupidest, littlest of things would set Harry off — leading to heart-wrenching periods of silence, an uncomfortable amount of tension, and constant reminders that her love wasn’t enough to make him happy.

And she just can’t keep living with that anymore. She can’t stand the fact that she has to keep thinking of him because he’s still here, all the time, swimming in the same gray area she’s been drowning in.

“That’s not fair.” Y/n frowns, her eyes briefly looking up to get a glimpse of his face, which is red and as broken as ever, and she curses her wandering eyes.

“I don’t go out with other women because you’re still my wife.” Harry nearly sobs the last word, still finding it hard to speak after everything they had been through. Because really, is she his wife, or just the ghost of her? “I still love you just as much. I’d be cheating on you if I even thought of it.”

And it’s true. Harry hasn’t looked at or even thought of another woman since the moment his heart found hers. She’s the first one he sees — in a room full of people, in his daydreams, in his music — she’s the only one he sees, in everything. He couldn’t even imagine it.

Y/n flutters her eyes closed to keep her composure, wishing now more than ever to be sucked up into the earth’s core again because she doesn’t want to be here anymore — in a room so close to him, feeling his every breath, hearing his every word echo in her head.

“Harry… I’m not your wife anymore. We’re separated. You’ve made it more than clear to me that you don’t love or want me anymore. I can’t keep living my life on your time.”

Y/n’s looking up at him as if begging him to understand, but he doesn’t. He may have fucked up one too many times down the line, but at the end of the day, he’s never once told Y/n he didn’t love her anymore. And he couldn’t even dream of telling Y/n he didn’t want her anymore, he’d throw up if he so much as tried.

There isn’t a universe Harry wouldn’t want Y/n in. She’s all he’s ever wanted.

“When have I ever said that?”

He asks it like her words sucked all that was left out of him and she almost wants to take it back, but she won’t.

“You didn’t have to.”

His eyes drop to the floor and a new wave of tears begin to rise at the surface, pushing at his throat.

He has nothing to say for himself.

Y/n sighs, her eyes wandering around the room as she waits for Harry to break this deafening silence, but he doesn’t. So, she lifts her purse higher upon her shoulder before coughing awkwardly to the open air.

“Topher is in the car seat all ready to go. His binkie should be in there, too. I would love to stay and chat but I really need to get —”

“Please, don’t go.” Harry interrupts, his voice cracking as he closes his eyes, loose tears falling down his cheeks and hitting the hardwood floor below them, hand inching closer to hers. “Stay here with me.”

She’s frozen still, the feeling of her hand being this close to his knocking the breath straight out of her lungs and nearly sending her to her knees. Because how badly does she want to — how badly does Y/n want to break the laws of reality just to be with her Harry again, even for a second, but she can’t keep letting herself believe they will ever come back from this. She can’t keep going back to Harry.

She has to stop choosing Harry.

“I can’t, Harry.” She breathes out, not having the heart or the strength to look up into the very eyes that never fail to make her fall in love. “I can’t stay with you any longer. I have to go.”

And before Harry could reach for her any farther, she was already gone.

Y/n was practically dead to the world — all her apartment lights shut off, all doors and windows locked, phone turned off and buried somewhere beneath all the covers she’s been hibernating in — before she heard someone practically beating down her front door.

She rolls over to her nightstand, groaning as her eyes blink to adjust to the blue light reading 1:04AM vibrantly in the dark. She sits herself up on her elbow, huffing out a breath as her hands reach up to rub the dryness out of her eyes.

She looks around her room as her brain scrambles to process reality, but it isn’t until another series of knocks jolt her up from where she sits, nearly losing balance in the process.

“Why? Why can’t I have nice things?” Y/n whispers to herself as she makes her way out of her bedroom to her front door, way too far out of her mind to bother checking her peephole before unlocking the knob and swinging it open.

“Mitch!” Y/n shrieks, her arms held out stiffly in front of her as Harry’s body is thrown into them — not so sure if holding him up is the appropriate thing to do considering they haven’t even touched each other once since the separation. “What the fuck!”

“You don’t answer your fucking phone!” Mitch fumes, his eyes bewildered and unsteady as his body is so visibly angry he doesn’t even know what to do with himself — pinching his lips between his fingers, practically walking in circles, trying his hardest to breathe through the pit of fire burning in his chest. “Needed to get him the fuck away from me!”

Mitch knows it’s not Y/n’s fault that she wasn’t answering his calls — it is well over midnight, after all — but he has been so pushed over the edge that he doesn’t have time to think about anything else other than being as far away from Harry as humanly possible.

Y/n’s struck with confusion because in all the four years she had been with Harry, he never had any problems with Mitch. Sure, they’d bump heads about which notes sound better in certain songs, or bicker a bit after long hours at the studio, but never anything like this.

“Been pissing me off all night about your stupid date! Proper fucking idiot, he is. Files a divorce with you, for what? To get jealous at every man that makes eyes at you? Arrogant son of a bitch, had half the mind to knock him in before I decided to bring him here.”

“Shut up, Mitch!” Harry growls groggily against the skin of Y/n’s shoulder.

Mitch turns his body to face Harry’s back, one hand on his hip while the other rubs along the roots of his beard, his face scrunching with what Y/n can only consider to be a look of complete malice.

He knows he shouldn’t be throwing Harry under the bus about their private conversations, especially ones that consist of Y/n, but there’s only so much he could put up with.

It’s sickening, really — having to constantly be there for Harry when everything that’s gotten him to this point has been his own fault. Harry doesn’t deserve comforting, but Mitch has been alongside him for far too long to not care about his feelings and emotions… no matter how wrong they are.

And what’s even more sickening is seeing how badly he’s hurting his own self by avoiding the divorce entirely instead of taking responsibility for his actions. Mitch could go on and on about all the ways to make things right again, yet still in some way, somehow, it always seems to go right past Harry’s head.

Because trying to sway Harry’s mind or his decisions is practically like pulling teeth — he’ll always find a way to go against what everybody else says and it drives Mitch up the wall. He’s sick and tired of wasting his breath all because Harry’s too stubborn to take anybody else’s path but his own.

“You couldn’t just bring him home? Where the hell is Topher?”

Y/n is struggling to keep Harry up because she’s not even sure if she’s doing it right. He’s got his entire body pressed up against hers, all of his weight being held by her still half-asleep arms and he shouldn’t even be here.

“No, I couldn’t bring him home because the first three times I tried, he wouldn’t get out of my damn car.” Mitch growls through clenched teeth, the side of his fist taking one last swing at Y/n’s open door.

He takes a couple deep breaths, his elbow leaning against the doorframe and he squeezes his eyes shut to regain his composure. “Topher’s with Sarah for the night. Now, for the love of fuck, make Harry grow a pair of balls so he can finally talk to you and not me, please.”

His eyes are pleading with Y/n’s silently, and she nods her head at him in response. She can’t leave Harry like this if she wanted to, anyways.

She sighs, holding Harry against her chest now to get a proper grip on him, and she can feel him press a small kiss against the crook of her neck.

“Have a good night, Mitch. Take care of yourself.”

She smiles softly at him, and for a moment in time, she feels like everything might be okay.

Maybe she only feels this way because this is the first time she’s touched Harry in a year now and it gives her the sense of clarity she’s been missing for so long. Or, maybe she feels this way because Mitch was always the one who was rooting for them despite everything they’ve been through, and knowing he still cares enough about the both of them to bring Harry to her apartment to talk gives her the smallest bit of hope she’s been needing.

“You too, Y/n.”

Mitch gives her one last reassuring look before he shuts the door, leaving Y/n and Harry alone in the confines of her apartment with absolutely nowhere else to go.

She guides him to her couch, which was a bit more difficult than she expected considering Harry is nearly twice her height and much stronger than he realizes. It takes almost all the energy out of her to get him to take a few steps of his own until he’s finally sitting upon the cushions.

“Your date.” Harry mumbles against her shoulder while she lays him down upon the couch, his glossy eyes looking up at her with genuine hurt and concern when his head lays upon the pillow. “Did he treat you nice?”

Y/n smiles softly to herself, reaching for the blanket sprawled atop of the couch — the very blanket Harry gifted her for the first Christmas they spent together. It’s been her favorite ever since.

“I didn’t go.”

“You didn’t go?”

Harry can’t deny that he feels happy about it — happy that she didn’t spend the night with somebody else, happy that she couldn’t find it in her heart to move on from him quite yet. But another part of him — a bigger part of him — suddenly feels guilty, and empty, and like his insides have all been set on fire until they all melted to nothing.

She’s been alone all night. She’s been alone every night. And sure, she had Topher to keep her company throughout the week… but she’s lonely and she’s sad. He can see it in everything she does. And tonight was her one night to be herself again, and somehow, Harry managed to find a way to take it all away from her, just like he’s done with everything else.

She was going to go if he hadn’t guilt-tripped her and begged her not to leave. And she looked so pretty, so fucking breathtaking, for nobody to see it. And that alone is enough to make the last bit of his heart completely shatter until his chest becomes a voided pit.

Y/n nods her head, emotionless, as she pulls the blanket up to his chin. “You were right, we’re still married. It wasn’t fair of me.”

She knows it would have been fair either way, but after seeing how upset Harry looked upon the realization that she was going out with somebody else, she couldn’t stomach the thought of spending the rest of the night trying to make another man happy — one, she’s sure, wouldn’t have even made her happy.

She still didn’t choose Harry, but she didn’t choose anybody else, either, and to know that puts her head at rest. At least for a little while.

“With that being said,” Y/n coughs a bit, blinking away the tears that were mere seconds from falling, “You really need to pick a court date, Harry.”

He knows he does. He’s been draining himself out trying to think of the best time to get it all done — it has taken him twelve months, after all. But the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes he doesn’t want to be done — not with their marriage, not with her.

He doesn’t think he’ll ever want for it to all be done. And so whenever he plans to meet with his lawyer, he can only get as far as parking his car in the lot because he never has the strength to actually walk inside.

Because he knows once he does, there’s no going back, and he can’t imagine himself not going back to her.

So, he’ll cry. He’ll scream, he’ll punch at his steering wheel, he’ll hit his head against the headrest over, and over, and over again until he’s so worn out he can hardly breathe. Because he can’t do it. He doesn’t want to do it.

There have been five appointments he couldn’t bring himself to go to, and she has no idea.

“I can’t.” Harry whispers with bloodshot eyes and shaking hands — refusing to look at her because he doesn’t know what will happen if he does. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to leave you?”

Y/n’s breath hitches in her throat because of all the things she expected him to say, that surely wasn’t one of them.

Deep down, she knows he’s hurting, but she never expected it to be so hard on him. Besides, he made it seem so easy — to leave her, like she meant nothing to him after the four years they had been together. And she couldn’t count the amount of times Harry had reminded her that he didn’t have feelings for her anymore.

So that’s what she always believed — that he didn’t love her, that he didn’t want her, that he didn’t need her. But hearing Harry cry out those very words, do you have any idea how hard it is to leave you?, makes her question everything she had ever known.

Because he did leave her — has left her on her own for a year now and has never given her a reason to believe he wanted it any other way until this very moment; Harry laying drunk on her living room couch, crying over the thought of her with another man. He has barely looked at her, has barely even touched her, until now — until it’s been far too late.

“You’ve already left me.” Y/n whispers, the tears she once blinked back now falling freely and silently down her cheeks.

There’s a crack in her voice that Harry can feel down his spine, shaking him to his core and leaving him frozen still. He’s never heard her sound so hurt and broken before and he feels his chest hallowing from the inside out; he is the only one to blame.

If he could just tell her everything he hasn’t — if he could just prove to her that not a single fiber in his body has let her go — no matter the consequences, he would in a heartbeat.

But Harry really hasn’t fought for anything in his life, he wouldn’t even know where to begin — he wouldn’t even know what to say, or what to do, to pick up all these pieces. And the worst part is that he wants to, so badly, but he worries that it won’t be enough — that he won’t be enough — and he won’t be able to handle it. His entire world would collapse.

He blindly reaches for her hand because she’s the only one that can ground him and he feels like he’s falling into a never-ending abyss with no safety-net. Truthfully, he’s been feeling that way for an entire year, until now, with her hand in his.

“Not even a little bit.” He breathes out from quivering lips, eyes unblinking, staring helplessly at their intertwined fingers.

Y/n sobs behind her pursed lips, squeezing her eyes closed as she stomps her foot down upon the floor because this can’t be happening. He can’t be doing this, not now — not when she’s this far into grieving his loss, not when she was finally taking her first step away from him. He can’t.

“Harry —”

“Before you say anything please, please just listen to me.”

Both of his hands are now cradling hers in his palms, slightly tugging at her arm because he is wholeheartedly desperate to say everything she needs to hear.

If he doesn’t get it all out now, he may never have her again. And if he has to spend the rest of his goddamn life being so lonely that he begins to loathe the world for moving on when his own stopped turning, he’d rather do it knowing he at least tried.

And if there’s one person he’d try anything for — do anything for — it would be his wife.

“When I filed the divorce it — it wasn’t because of you, okay? I didn’t — fuck — I thought it was my only choice. And it wasn’t because I didn’t love you the same, or because I wanted to be with somebody else, it was because I wasn’t what you deserved.”

Y/n’s staring down at him with furrowed eyebrows and open lips, everything around her moving so quickly she can hardly keep up.

These are answers she’s been begging for for nearly two years now, yet somehow, nothing could have prepared herself for them. She’s gotten so used to wondering — so used to questioning how the universe will take control of their destiny that now, having all the answers seems to defy all forms of faith.

It’ll all be in her hands now. What they’ll be in a year from now, where they’ll be a year from now, or who they’ll be with a year from now is all up to her. Because at the end of it all, Harry wouldn’t be pulling her closer, sobbing into her hand, breaking down all his walls and boundaries if he didn’t want her to break off the divorce.

“I would be away from you for months on end, so goddamn far away that god forbid something were to happen to you, I couldn’t be the first one by your side. I couldn’t be the first one to make you smile each morning, or be the first one to keep you together whenever the world was breaking you down.

“I wasn’t your first, for anything. I couldn’t be. And it was tearing me apart, knowing you were all alone every day and every night. But then I’d come home and it would feel — it would feel so good, like time hadn’t passed between us… but it did, so, so fast, and in a blink of an eye, I’d have to leave you again.”

His mind thinks back to all the times he’s had Y/n crying on his shoulder the nights before he had to leave the country, clinging onto him and begging him to stay with her just a little while longer.

They were so in love with each other that they hardly wanted to spend any time away from one another because they had a connection that was so raw and so real, they couldn’t find it in anything or anybody else. So each time he had to wake up at the crack of dawn to travel the world, Y/n pouting on the bed watching him pack his life together, would break him in two every single time.

The world meant nothing without her.

“The hole that kept swallowing me up every time I had to walk out on you became too much. But I couldn’t tell you that. I couldn’t tell you that because — because I wanted to hold it together so badly for you. I needed to keep it together because I knew if I couldn’t, you wouldn’t be able to, either. It was already so hard on you and I knew that and I kept leaving. And if I had told you that I spent every single night away from you crying my fucking eyes out, you’d sacrifice everything else you had to come be with me… and I couldn’t do that to you.

“And the more I kept bottling it up, the more I took it out on you. I didn’t want to — didn’t even mean to — but I did, in ways that I couldn’t justify to you because I couldn’t even justify them to myself. Then there was a part of me — the worst and most selfish part of me — that couldn’t apologize for it because the world had somehow convinced me that I didn’t need to.”

By now, Y/n’s knees are pressed against the front of the couch as Harry hooks one of his arms around her legs, his forehead making a home at the front of her hip.

“I’d just get more upset with myself, more angry, more ashamed. It was this constant cycle — feeling like I wasn’t enough for you, then blaming you for all my mistakes, pushing you away even farther. Then you got pregnant.”

They both let out a sob.

“And all I could think about was… if I couldn’t be there for my wife, how could I be there for my son? How could I show him the world and give him everything he ever wished for if I couldn’t even do that for you — for the one person I would choose over anything?”

His chin rests where his forehead once did, his red and puffy eyes trying their best to stay open enough to take a good look at her.

“I loved you beyond words. I looked at you and I saw my entire life in front of me. You continuously blew me away, every single day. Being away from you was — it was dangerous. You weren’t beside me and I was just this empty pit wallowing in hotel rooms that I didn’t even want to be in. I couldn’t get enough of you no matter how much I tried. You consumed me whole, and yet I still found a way to convince you that you were the one who wasn’t enough for me.”

He lets out a laugh through his cries, trying to wrap his head around the fact that he’s capable of destroying such beautiful things — things that were eternal, things that were once unbreakable.

And here he is, praying that he can also be the man that fixes them.

“Then I thought… if she found someone else that could give her everything she deserved, maybe he could be a better father to our son, too. And I was so scared and so angry and so sad I just — I did what I thought would make you happier instead of being a fucking man and owning up to it. But I didn’t, and now look at what’s in my hands. You’re all alone because of me. You’re crying because of me. Topher has to go back and forth between his parents because of me. I’m skipping meetings with my lawyer because I decided to file for a fucking divorce I didn’t even want. I broke our family apart, I broke us apart, I tore you from the inside out and didn’t even tell you that I was sorry.”

His eyes are closed, mouth open as it chokes out sounds of sorrow and pain, sounds of collapsing lungs and a torn chest.

“And I am so fucking sorry, baby.”

He speaks between sobs, his words broken and cracked but Y/n hears them loud and clear. He’s got her hand cradled against his soaking cheek, her palm pressed against the corner of his mouth that Harry keeps kissing.

He can’t fucking breathe and he really thinks this is it — that these are his last moments on earth and the next time he blinks, he’ll never open his eyes again.

Would he even want to, if Y/n isn’t the first thing he sees?

“I’m so sorry that I wasn’t the husband you needed me to be. I’m sorry that I let you down. I’m sorry I let our son down. I’m sorry that I didn’t talk to you. I’m sorry that you’ve been waiting on me and held yourself back because of me. I’m sorry that I made you feel like you weren’t loved.”

He keeps kissing at her hand, rubbing at the back of her legs, holding onto her like he’d collapse if he dared let her go. He knows he’s going to have to eventually, but he can’t think about that right now.

He needs this — to feel her, to smell her, to soak her all in before their new forever begins, spent apart and living lives so far away from one another that they couldn’t cross paths even if they wanted to.

This is his goodbye. He knows it. She’s not going to forgive him no matter how much he begs for her to understand — how could she? He can’t blame her. He hasn’t even forgiven himself and doesn’t expect anything more from her now, other than to listen to him one last time.

“I love you so much and there will never be a universe where I don’t, or won’t. I think about you… everyday, every second. To this day, I wake up reaching for you at least three times a night, wondering why you aren’t with me. Every time I come to pick Topher up I spend an hour in front of my bathroom mirror telling myself that I have to hold myself back from you. And then when I see you, I have to keep myself together and hold myself in place because you just get more and more beautiful with every day that passes and — and it breaks my heart all over again.”

Y/n reaches her hand down to his hair, gently brushing her fingers back against his scalp because he needs her — she knows he needs her and she can’t choose to be selfish now.

Right now, he doesn’t need her to be anything but his wife, and this may be the last time she’ll ever be his.

They keep each other embraced for a while, silently, unmoving and bracing themselves for the fall they’re each going to have to take.

These are their dying moments — their final moments before the casket gets shut and thrown six feet below them — and it won’t be long before the dirt from the ground gets piled up again, over their bodies, leaving them to decay in the life they once believed belonged to them.

They know it’s to come, because this is the first time that they have been so close to each other, yet feel so lonely all at once. And it’s not supposed to be this way.

“I can’t pick a date, Y/n,” Harry breaks the silence with a whisper, almost losing his voice along the way because what he’s about to say is enough to kill him, “but if you give me one I’ll — I’ll do it, okay?”

He holds her hand even tighter than before.

“If that’s what will make you happy, I’ll do it.”

#Harry Styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagines #harry styles imagine #divorce series

2K notes · View notes

lizzy-williams · 4 years ago

Text

𝐭𝐰𝐨

♡ Warnings: sexual intercourse, language, drugs, sexual assult, threesome

♡ Request: Would you do a imagine where the reader is best friends with Colson and Yungblud and they go to a bar and this guy is touching on the reader and her trying to get away and they come and save her and ends with jealous kinky ASF smut??

♡ Theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-URGVmuYIQ

Animal by Sir Chloe

masterlist

𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐓𝐎 admit, even though you weren’t really an extroverted person, dancing with your two friends was enjoyable, and actually fun. It was nice to let loose and move your body like nobody was watching.

I Think I’m Okay was now an award winning song, and you were there to watch it all, being friends with Colson before hand. And meeting Domanic was just the thing you needed. He brought a sense of energy to the group, and Colson became instant friends.

Their friendship was close, and you were thankful to have such a good friendship triangle. Each of you balanced each other out, and at the center of the two boys was you. You were the peace before the disturbance. You were good for them, almost like a guardian, keeping them in check.

But over time, you felt yourself gain feelings. But for both of them. And you hated it. Being the person you were, you were indecisive as hell. And you weren’t stupid, you saw the way they would look at you. Like there was something they wanted. So in retrospect, you could have either of them. But you wanted them both.

But now that you were on a crowded club floor, dancing and touching the boys, switching back and forth. You were with Colson at the moment, his hands on your waist as he stood behind you, his breath felt in the crook of your neck, making you back up more into him, and it was obvious that he had a hard on, making you smile to yourself. You loved how tightly you had him wrapped around your finger.

“I’m gonna go get a drink, okay?” you finally said, trying your best to talk over the music streaming through the large speakers.

Colson was close to coming with you, not wanting to lose the contact that he had an insatitable craving for. But instead, all he did was nod his head, which he mentally kicked himself for.

You smiled, sinking away in the stuffed crowd of people, Colson keeping his eyes on you until you were out of sight.

As you walked up to the bar, you ordered a Sex On the Beach, leaning over the counter as you waited.

“You here alone?” a voice brushed up closely to your right ear as you whipped around in shock, frightened; it was a voice you had never heard before.

Your thoughts scrambled to find a response that would make him leave you alone, the vibes he gave you were totally off, and you wanted nothing to do with him as his eyes raked up and down your body.

“Uh, yeah, I have a boyfriend.” you responded confidently, trying not to seem scared, even though you were terrified.

He suddenly grabbed your wrist making you yelp out, trying to get away as he struggled to get away. Out of self-defence, you held up your hand, giving him a harsh and brutal slap to his face, almost loud enough for people to hear over the speakers.

“You fucking slut!” he yelled, pushing you to the ground making you hit your head... hard.

It was honestly a fuzzy blur what happened next, your vision hazy as you tried to make sense of what was happening. You saw two blurry figures make their way quickly towards you, one of them holding you up, shaking you a little. The other hazy form proceeded to kick the shit out of the guy that caused all this, your confused mind trying to make sense of all of this.

You were then stood up and walked out the front door. When your vision was finally coming to, you were face to face with Dominic, who had a severely concerned look etched onto his face.

“Wh-What the fuck,” you mumbled.

“My thoughts exactly, what the fook happened?” Dominic’s voice was almost frantic with worry.

“I dunno... where’s Colson??” you asked, noticing that the tall blond was absent from your view.

“Currently beating the shit out of the guy that shoved you. Did he hurt you anywhere else?” he asked, touching your head lightly to see where your head hit the solid floor.

“No, he just scared me, that’s all,” that’s all you muttered, suddenly feeling sick to your stomach as you recalled the events leading up to your head injury.

“Come ‘ere,” he hummed, pulling you into a tight hug, happy that you were okay.

“You have to admit, that was a pretty good hit though,” you laughed into the side of his neck, his arms squeezing gently, pulling your small frame closer to his.

“I only saw the half of it. I’m proud of ya, love, you really handled yourself in there,” he smiled, resting his chin on the top of your head, smiling contently.

The door to the club suddenly burst open, a bloody Kells coming into view, his eyes frantically looking around for you. Once he caught sight of both you and Dom, he rushed over, hugging the both of you.

“Jesus fuck, are you okay, [ y / n ]??” he question, looking at your head to see a bruise forming from where it was struck.

You nodded, wondering how many times the two boys would be asking you that. It felt nice, having your two best friends check on you like this. Of course it was no surprise that they would make sure you were okay, but they went out of their way to protect you, Dom for emotional support and Colson for physical protection, beating the fuck out of a perv was probably one of the nicest things someone had done for you, and for that, you were grateful.

“We should head to your place, Cols.” Dom spoke up, Colson giving a quick and steady nod.

*****

As you reached Colson’s house, you were exhausted, but mostly trying to get over the throbbing headache making its assault on your brain. You collapsed on the couch, leaning all the way back, trying your best to relax, your head thrown back against the back cushion of the piece of furniture, letting out a deep exhale.

Little did you know that the two boys watched the unintentionally erotic actions, the two of them awkwardly shuffling to the kitchen trying to hide their obvious hard-ons.

You heard them from the living room, whisper yelling at each other, as you tried to make out what they were actually saying. Soon enough, they came back to the living room.

“Hey, I was thinking that all of us could chill upstairs and watch a movie or something, if that’s okay with you,” Colson spoke up, and you had to say, it didn’t sound like a bad idea.

Watching movies with Dom and Colson was fun, because you were basically movie commentators. And you had gained many inside jokes from movie nights, so needless to say, you were down for it.

“Yeah, but what about this,” you motioned to your body that was still displaying your short black club dress, your heels already kicked off and on the floor.

“You can use one of my hoodies,” Colson suggested.

“Pants?”

“Who needs pants, we’re your best friends, [ y / n ], we don’t care.” Colson objected, trying everything in his power to see you in an outfit that he had only dreamed about... you in his sweatshirt, with nothing but your panties on underneath? The thought made him almost drool.

“Come on, love, what’s the worst that could happen?” Dom chirped.

*****

“Yo, [ y / n ], you almost done in there?!” Colson yelled out to you in his bathroom, the two other boys already comfortable in Colson’s king sized bed, the TV displaying Netflix.

You just looked at yourself in the mirror. You were about to walk out in this? It’s not like the sweatshirt was the problem, the damn thing went nearly down to your lower thigh. It was the fact that you were pants-less. Colson did have a point, they were your best friends, and they truly wouldn’t care, but something in the back of your head told you that there was a part of them that did care, and not in an innocent way.

“Yeah, coming!” you called out, fixing your hair best you could before stepping out.

As you opened the door, you watched at the two boys looked your way, the reactions priceless. Dominic loved how sweet and innocent you looked, the sweater reaching over your hands was the cutest thing he had ever seen. And Colson felt a swell of pride in his chest, knowing that the girl he was falling for was wearing his sweatshirt almost like a trophy.

“Come on, then,” Dom patted the open space between him and Colson, a bright smile on his face.

You smiled in return, jumping into bed and snuggling under the covers quickly, pulling them up. Dominic couldn’t hide the hearts in his eyes as he snaked his hand around your waist and Colson’s hand gently finding your own.

The movie went on, and the three of you were more quiet than usual. Even though the movie in front of you on the screen was one of the stupidest movies you had ever seen. Nothing would make any of you crack.

After almost an hour of deafening silence, you finally spoke, “ Thank you guys...,” you muttered, your voice barely higher than a whisper.

The two turned to you and they smiled, “Of course,” Colson said, his hand squeezing yours.

“Anytime, m’love.” Dom agreed.

You then took notice how the boys had now moved closer to you, the space between the three of you closing in. And almost like a dream, the two of them let their hands roam. But you didn’t stop them. You didn’t want to.

“Wh-What are you-”

“Shh, just let us make you feel good, princess,” Colson muttered against you as you felt him lick the shell of your ear, Dom’s hands shifting up and down your waist, leaving goosebumps in it’s wake.

Considering what happens only a few hours ago, a normal person would push them away, it was almost common sense. But they weren’t the perv at the bar, they were people you trusted. And you trusted them with everything.

You let Colson’s hands found their way under the sweatshirt, while Dom’s hands found their way to your thighs, squeezing and prodding. And usually what would be self consciousness, you felt it melt away as he muttered praise, your body confidence raising with every admiring comment.

Colson’s hand found it’s way to your breasts, kneading and rubbing his thumb over the pebbled nipples, making you let out a small whimper of want. You wanted so much more.

“Such a needy lil thing, aren’t ya, [ y / n ]?” Dom whispered, his hand taking the hem of your underwear and pulling it down slowly, your legs seemingly had a mind of their own as they moved to accommodate his actions.

Dom’s fingers gently drifted up your thighs, than to your slit, grazing your clit as you whined. Colson’s hands were now all the way up your shirt.

“No bra, huh?” Colson smirked, tweaking your nipple as you let out a sigh, your eyes meeting his, “You wanted this, didn’t you?”

“You wanted both of us?” Dom pressed, the pads of his digits now pressing harshly against your clit, making you whine out, making your head throw back.

Colson took this opportunity to attack your neck with needy, wet kisses. You hand went up to his hair, your fingers pulling gently against his hair, as his tongue licked a strip up your throat.

You let out a full on moan at the erotic action, and the two boys couldn’t lie, they were taken back by it. But shock soon turned into want as you watched Dom shift, pulling your legs open, his form going between your thighs.

“You like it dirty, huh princess?” Colson continued to whisper dark nothings into your neck, “I never took you as a kinky girl... do you wanna be our good girl? At least for to night?”

You nodded your head, “Yes.”

“Yes what, baby?” he lifted his hands up, his fingers gently covering your neck.

“Yes, daddy, I want to be your good girl,” you sighed, and your body soon relaxed as his lips met yours.

Meanwhile, Dom was staring at your pussy. This was something that he had been picturing for weeks. He touched himself to the possiblities of what it was look like. But now that he was face to face with it, he could feel the painful strain his pants had on his shaft.

“Gotta stretch you out, love, are you alright with that?” he asked.

“Yes, daddy...,” you muttered out.

“Daddy, huh?” realizing that he was zoned out while you had your exchange with Colson. He had been called many things. Maybe even Master. But daddy was a change of pace, and he thought he would try it on for size.

Dom looked at you face the entire time as you felt his finger sink deep into your core. You let out loud moans. You wanted this more than anything. He then leaned down, never shifting his eyes away from your face as you threw your head back, letting out moans when his tongue finally made contact with your clit. It was heaven, and he obviously knew what he was doing.

Colson messed with your breasts. But soon he became irritated by the fabric covering your upper half. He stripped you of his sweatshirt, and his lips went directly to your breasts.

You were in nirvana as the two boys ravished your body. The coil inside of you began to tighten, and you knew it would snap if Dom kept hitting you just right and harshly sucking your clit.

“Daddy! F-Fuck! I’m gonna cum, please don’t stop!” desperate for release, you held onto his hair.

“Let go, baby, we have you,” Colson muttered against your temple before giving a sweet kiss to the area. Almost out of instinct, you took one of your hands away from Dom’s hair and intertwined it with Colson’s large hands.

You suddenly felt your orgasm crash over you violently like a tidal wave, your core clenching Dom’s fingers like a fist, your legs shaking, Dom’s hands holding them still as he licked you clean, helping you ride out your high.

Colson suddenly reached his free hand down to your sensitive pussy and swiped his fingers along your slit, gathering your cum on his fingers as he brought it up to his mouth, sucking on them.

“Fuck, darlin’, you taste amazing...,” Dom cut in, licking his lips that were once coated in your essence.

Dom ripped your small hand away from his hair, pressing a soft kiss to your wrist, peppering it with affection.

“If you two don’t get undressed soon, I might flip out,” you enquired, almost too excited to see the fully exposed bodies of the forms you had been fantasizing about ever since you found out you had feelings for them.

They obliged but they made sure that that was the only demand you were making that night. once they were fully nude, you almost felt like drooling, the both of them bigger than you had pictured them.

And now you could see how many tattoos Colson actually had.

You watched as the two got nearer, both of them closing in around you. You felt like you were going to burst, wanting them both so badly.

Dom immediately went to your side, Colson taking position at the foot of the bed, his eyes trained on you as he gave a few swift pumps to his shaft. Dominic kissed you passionately, his tongue running over your bottom lip.

Colson soon got on top of you, the feeling of his cock dragging right over your pussy making you moan out silently.

“Ready, princess?” he growled, his head going to the side of your neck.

You nodded.

“Now, come on love, use your words darlin’,” Dom tisked, his hand running over your breast.

“Yes, Daddy.” you muttered, Colson’s lips meeting yours as he began to slowly sink into you, your hand clutching Dom’s as you tried to adjust.

“Fuck, princess, so fucking tight, aren’t you, huh?” Colson groaned against the skin of your neck.

“Does it feel good, love?” Dom asked, wanting to hear you tell him everything you were feeling. He, in fact, had a slight voyeurism kink.

“It feels so good, daddy, fuck he’s stretching me out so fucking good,” you cursed rapidly as Colson started to move, his hips slamming into yours harshly, giving you somewhat little time to adjust.

You let out loud moans of pleasure, Dom taking your breasts and putting them in your mouth, wanting nothing more than to give you as much pleasure as he could. You loved the feeling of his tongue rolling over your pebbled nipples, the heat radiating off the two boys highly erotic, making you only want them more.

“F-Faster daddy,” you muttered, your hand reaching up to his hair, his other hand now on his back, scratching it up as you felt Colson’s groan let out vibrations that made you whine.

“Anything for you, princess,” he groaned, his hips soon slamming against yours, fucking you hard, fast, and raw. It was amazing, and nothing like you had ever had before. It was thrilling.

You watched as Dom continued to lick your nipples. But you felt bad. Colson was getting his pleasure. And you decided Dom did too. You took your hand that was on Colson’s back, and taking his cock in your hands, giving it a squeeze as you watched his reaction. It almost made you cum right then and there.

“Fuck, you look so gorgeous like this,” he grunted, your hand now moving up and down quickly, your thumb occasionally brushing over a throbbing vein.

Colson violently fucked you, his shaft appearing and disappearing in your folds. It felt amazing as you felt two pair of hands ravaging your body like they were. Dom’s hand was now between your legs, pinching you clit, making you clench.

The feeling of euphoria came closer and closer as you began to tense up.

“You gonna cum, baby?” Colson hissed against your skin.

“Yes, daddy, please let me cum! I’ve earned it...,” you pleaded, wanting nothing more than to let go, but not without they’re say so.

“Hold on just as little while longer, love, I want us all to cum together,” Dom sighed, his hand now rubbing quicker.

But you couldn’t. You were so close, so selfish, you wanted to cum. So bad.

And you did. And it felt so fucking good, your legs shaking, your core tensing, and your grip on Dom’s cock tightening.

It started a chain reaction, Colson’s hips stuttering as he felt you clench, his cum shooting into you, Dom cumming right after you.

You all road out your highs. But after all of you were down to earth, they each gave you deadly glares of disappointment. You had a look of guilt etched on your face.

“And you were doin’ so good,” Dom muttered, getting up and standing at the foot of the bed, Colson doing the same thing.

“Get the rope.” Colson gave you a dangerous look.

You fucked up.

#machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly x reader #machine gun kelly smut #yungblud #yungblud x reader #yungblud smut #hotel diablo #tickets to my downfall #concert for aliens #estxx #rookxx #bloody valentine #bazexx #machine gun kelly imagine #yungblud imagine

650 notes · View notes

daggerandrose · 4 years ago

Photo

Happy 28th! I’m making this the night before and crossing my fingers that Louis drops something today (a single, a doc, or even a selfie would be a blessing and I would lose my shit). In any case that he doesn’t... have some fics to read!

As always, please leave a kudos/comment on these as I know they fuel writers. Enjoy!

Love, Ever After, 20.7k, by @jacaranda-bloom

One would assume that the charismatic omega in charge of the local matchmaking service would have found a mate and settled down ages ago. His clients, in fact, are always a bit surprised when they come to learn that Louis is still single. But Louis doesn’t mind, not really. His standards are just high; he is happy holding out for his alpha, his soulmate, and chooses to not waste his time with anyone else, despite what his friends might think.

That is, until his best mate from uni drags him out of bed far too early on a Saturday morning after a night of drinking to go to a farmers market, of all places. It’s there that he proceeds to make an utter fool of himself in front of the hottest alpha he has ever laid eyes on. There’s truly no coming back from that, is there?

OR The one where omega Louis makes love matches, alpha Harry makes cheese, and meddling friends might finally make their dreams of finding their soulmate come true.

Like air to the fire I need you to breathe, 4.6k, by CuckooTrooke

"Your nest is very beautiful" Louis says in awe, feeling his chest bubble with love as he watches Harry preen at the compliment.

"You like it?" Harry asks shyly, picking up a lonely sock from the center of his nest and replaces it on the side of his nest. He looks at it thoughtfully until shaking his head at himself, picking up the sock again. Louis watches him at this important task, how the placement of the smallest things in his nest is so important.

"Of course I like it. It's very pretty" Louis praises. Louis was going to do this right. He was going to praise every little effort Harry had made and will still make with his nest, tell him how cozy and well put together it is. And practical, on top of everything. Despite of being situated in Louis’ closet. But it had so many blankets, duvets and pillows that Louis will happily make Harry fall apart in that nest when he goes into heat.

Well. He’ll try.

The thing is, Louis is sort of terrified.

Harry is in preheat and Louis is nervous about his upcoming heat, fearing that he might not be able to fulfill his mate's needs. Lucky for him, Harry knows hot to push the right buttons to get him relaxed.

But If This Ends, 107k, by @absoloutenonsense

Harry’s life as a vampire is routine. He spends his years moving around from place to place, learning as much as he can, and falling in love whenever the universe sees fit. When he tries to move his casual relationship with Louis to something more, it all gets turned on its head. As they navigate confusing thoughts and complex emotions, Harry finds himself torn between the love he feels for Louis and everything he thought he knew.

Counterculture, 6k, by @sadaveniren

It all culminated to this: Harry in the middle of a crowded basement, music blasting from the live show on the far side, shirtless amongst alphas and omegas who all weren’t covering their scents. He took a deep breath of the heavy air and he felt alive.

across city skyline (and straight through my heart), 76.4k, by @halosboat

Louis Tomlinson meets Hollywood Heartthrob, Harry Styles when he walks into Louis' little bakery one day.

Immediately, Louis is charmed by him and Louis thinks Harry might feel the same way, given the fact that Harry has visited the bakery everyday since he'd come to town.

Until one day, Harry walks in with a boyfriend under his arm and a smile on his face.

The one where Louis owns a small bakery that's well known in his town and Harry Styles is an actor who comes to town to film a new movie. Louis is endeared by him, but that doesn’t seem to matter since Harry Styles is already taken.

When The Wolf Comes Out (like a bullet in the dark), 9.8k, by @londonfoginacup

"So Dad was a..." Harry rolls the word around on his tongue, trying it out. "A werewolf?"

"In a sense, you could say that," Anne says. "It's certainly a more correct term than that vampire myth." She looks to Nick. "Grimshaw. Would you please explain exactly what the Madness entails?"

Nick nods. Harry has never been on the receiving end of his business face before, and finds he's more than a little intimidated. “Right, well the first thing you need to know is that, except with freak mutations, the madness only actively infects one individual at a time. Since your grandfather’s death, your father has been dealing with it. Now that he’s gone, it’s presumably moved to you.”

Too Young To Know, 35.4k, by @2tiedships2

Louis blinked awake and quickly wiped the tears from his eyes. This was the second morning in a row he had woken up after dreaming about Harry.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” Eric asked as he held Louis tighter in his arms. Louis liked being the little spoon, except for when he’d rather be holding someone else. Which were the past two days.

Or the one where Harry doesn’t present as an alpha… until he does.

This Ain’t Red Wine, 9k, by LetTheMusicMoveYou

It’s not until he gets a whiff of the contents of his glass that Louis realizes his grave mistake.

That’s not red wine.

It’s blood.

It’s probably not the most rational, but his first thought is what people are going to think when they discover his body. On the list of stupidest ways for a human to die, accidentally turning up to a Vampire party has to be pretty high up there.

(Or the one where Human Louis accidentally finds himself at a Vampire only party which actually turns out to maybe not be the worst thing).

don’t want no other shade of blue, 43.2k, by @louisisworthit

“I know you’re putting on an act,” says Harry after a moment, and Louis scowls when he realises the prince is actually amused.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” says Louis.

“All I’ve heard over the past couple of years are rumours of Prince Louis’ kindness, and generosity, and oh, he’s so handsome I can barely pour his tea without shaking!” says Harry, putting on a silly, high-pitched voice for the last bit. Louis’ scowl deepens. “I would already know if you were just another selfish, bratty omega prince. You can’t fool me, darling, but I admire your efforts.”

“As you said,” Louis grits out, “those are only rumours. I assure you, I’m a terrible person.”

no good unless it’s real, 17k, by @fackinglouis

“Here,” Harry says, pulling a strap off his shoulder so he can dig his phone out of his bag. “We can get each other’s numbers.” Louis shakes his head. “I have the practice’s number already,” he tells him. “And my number is definitely on file somewhere.”

Harry pauses, smile quirking a bit as he stares at Louis. The sun is still in his eyes, though, with his sunglasses pushed up onto his head still, so Louis credits his funny face to that.

“I’m trying to give you my number, Louis,” Harry explains around a breathy laugh.

“Oh,” Louis blinks, processing that. He scratches his temple, moves a piece of longer fringe back behind his ear, and then nods. “Okay.”

Or: Louis is a very busy farmer who’s just trying to make it to his next nap and Harry’s the new hot vet that’s determined to infiltrate every area of his life.

shameless self-promo: take my hand, wreck my plans, 38.1k by me!

Louis meets the man in the center of the room, feeling every eye on him.

“Mr. H,” he whispers.

The man smiles brightly and laughs as if he can’t believe his eyes. “It’s you,” he says breathlessly. “I didn’t think I would see you again.”

“Nor I you, especially under these circumstances.”

“Even so,” Mr H says, his eyes bouncing from Louis’ eyes to his lips. “Will you do me a great honor and join me in leading the first … um…”

“Dance?”

Mr. H laughs and nods. “Yes, that’s the one.”

Louis bites his lips and doesn’t hesitate before whispering, “Yes.”

Mr. H beams and reaches for Louis’ hand. Sparks fly at the touch and a zing of excitement shoots through Louis’ body. His face heats up as he’s afraid his scent would give away his feelings towards the other man.

#mine #fic rec #28th appreciation

54 notes · View notes

hacked-by-jake · 3 years ago

Text

Hey Ho! :D

You will always find this post in my blog description.🥰

(Well, since there’s not really much information about me, here’s a post of things you’ve been interested in and some facts about me.)

(Thanks to the Anon for the motivation to do this here! <3)

-----

So, Hi! You can call me HBJ! I don’t want to mention my real name and age here. 😁

I started publishing my fanfictions here on Tumblr a little over a year ago and haven’t left since. xD

My mother tongue is not English, I am from Germany. So if you find some mistakes, please excuse it, I’m doing my best and still learning. <3

I honestly have no idea what to write here so, have fun, if anyone reads through this here. 😂 At least that’s a little bit of me. :D

>The Ask Box is always open. So feel free to ask a question if you are interested (but I want to warn you, I am not answering everything, but I will let you know in this case) < <3

-------------------------------------------

Let's start! ❤️🌹🎭

-------------------------------------------

First of all 10 Random Facts about me. This was asked by an anon. Here is the original post.

I’m a giant nerd, there’s no place in my room that’s not full of merchandise.

I prefer to read stories that are self-published, for example here on Tumblr or on other sites, rather than real books.

I have a problem with jackets, I have tons of them.

I usually dye my hair according to the colors of characters I like.It all started with green/purple - because of the Joker. And the last color I have at the moment is all green because of Joker / Loki from Marvel (Oups)

Almost all tattoos I have are about fictional characters (also Oups)

No one, really nobody knows what books/stories I read because that’s something very private to me.

I listen to music 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Also, it’s hard for me / I don’t like to talk about the music I listen to because this is very intimate for me for some reason.

When I watch a series, it’s at least 2 times behind each other, sometimes more often. But never just once.

Films that I watch for the first time and that excite me, I watch every second that I have time. When the movie is over, I start again unless there are several parts. But then I always watch my favorite one 500 times.

-----

Random questions from you.

(Asked by @procrastinatingrobin) -One place that you'd like to travel at least once in your life?

---- One of my biggest wishes is (what a cliché xD) New York. For example the “Joker Stairs”, which is one of my biggest dreams. *-*

I would love to travel to a lot of locations from my favorite movies/series.🤭

America in general is a dream for me (a German potato 😂😅).

But there are so many beautiful places to which I want to go. For example, I would love to travel to Tenerife. I know someone who lives there and every time I see pictures I get very jealous. xD

Unfortunately, I’m incredibly afraid of flying, so if that doesn’t improve, I’ll never get anywhere near these places.😫😂😂

---

(Asked by Anon) How many tattoos do you have?😄

I love tattoo questions. 😂🤭At the moment I have eleven tattoos🥰

---

(Asked by Anon) -What's your favorite animal?

Hmmm I don’t really know, I think they are dogs because I have a dog now. *-* But to be honest, turtles are so cool.🤔 My brother has a turtle named: Schiggy (based on Pokémon)🤭

---

(Asked by Anon) -The stupidest thing that ever happened to you?

Ohhh hahaha there I have something good!😅Story Time with Hbj xD

Okay: As some might know, I’m a big fan of The Joker by DC.🃏Well, in 2019, the Joker movie with Joaquin Phoenix came to the cinemas and I was at the cinema premiere with my best friend. And the movie was absolutely amazing. I really wanted to watch the movie again..Aaaaand I was lucky because my best friend’s boyfriend also wanted to see the movie in the cinema so I went back to the cinema 5 days later to watch the movie again. I was so excited and so extremely happy that I trembled and could not stand still. xD And for these two reasons, I accidentally dropped my not really old phone. It just fell straight down on the stones in front of the cinema and the display was completely broken..Well, what can I say? I needed a new one.. 😂😅But the movie was still fantastic!😍🤭This is actually one of the stupidest things that ever happened to me. xD

---

(Asked by @kyras-things) What are the little things that make your day happiest?

Oh that’s a really nice question! *-*Well, I have really little things that can make me happy. :)-It is enough for me when I wake up tomorrow and see my merchandise shelf😅 (This is right in front of my bed)This is for most something really small but for me really great and makes me happy. <3Other things are music, stroking my dog, messages on my phone, my hair color, my tattoos, when the sun is shining in the morning, coffee, riding longboard and of course (yes this is my absolute serious and not only so therefore said) tumblr and thus at the same time Duskwood. 💕I think these are the most important things. 🤭All I need is to see something that matters to me.😅🥰

---

(Asked by @leetjep) Seriously....Do you ever sleep?

Very rarely😂 Last time I slept was in fall.😂

---

(Asked by Anon) Ios or android?

Only related to the phone: Android.Yes, I stand by it!😂

---

(Asked by @booklover-01040) Hello!I was wondering have you got any paranormal or creepy experiences? If no, then a nightmare that you will never forget.

Hey Ho! In fact, I haven’t experienced any paranormal things. Which is probably also because I don’t believe in that and I’ve found a rational cause for everything so far. (Important: I don’t believe in it, but I don’t say it doesn’t exist, I don’t want anyone to feel attacked)

And a nightmare I’ll never forget? In fact, I can’t think of any one. There’s a dream I’ve have since I was a kid: It’s about two little wolves trying to eat me. xD And I can even tell where that came from.

The movie to blame for this is: Twilight xD

Yep… When I first watched this movie, I was way too young, and as a child I was always very anxious. Just such things and horror movies in general were terrible for me (today it is actually no longer so) (Even the dream is no longer bad today and yet it has a bitter aftertaste of childhood.)

In any case, I was much too young and that did not let me go back then. xD But a really unsettling dream I had was: Well.. Do you know the Pink Panther? 😂

I once dreamed that the Panther “chased” me through an endless long corridor. It was an endless corridor in pink with countless doors. He sang the theme song and threw clocks at me…😅 And that went on all night until I woke up.

(This, by the way, had a trigger too. A German song (the rapper only took the melody of the title music and wrote his own lyrics. The text isn’t really cool though and that’s the reason)

----

(Asked by @dreamer-writer-fangirl) What color is your hair?

Well, at the moment my hair is green🤭

Check HERE and HERE for pictures.

----

(Asked by Anon) Is your brother younger or older than you?🤗

My brother is older than me.🥰

----

(Asked by Anon) Do you have a nickname?

Yes, actually I have one. I can even say it because it has nothing to do with my real name. :D But please don’t laugh at me. 😂Well, I have the loving nickname: Little Onion. yep…My mom gave me that name for some reasons. 😂

----

(Asked by Anon) some information about your dancing?😄 you mentioned it a few days ago💃

Yeah, well, I danced for 13 years, in different groups, also several groups at the same time. :D It was the hip hop/breakdance direction. But at some point I stopped because I didn’t enjoy it in the groups anymore and time was getting tighter. :/ Unfortunately, there was and is no real other groups here, which is why I stopped completely and now only dance for myself and just for fun.🤭

(Asked by Anon) What's your favourite food ?

Uhhhm, I think everything with pasta is my favorite food.😂 I can eat noodles all day. 🤭🍝🍜Well, and of course, Pizza!🍕Pizza is adorable. 😂

----

(Asked by Anon) What type of video games do you like to play?

I don’t really have a favorite type / genre, I don’t play video games that often. I’m actually playing what looks exciting to me without any particular genre or type. 😁🤭

But if I do, I guess I’m the most Nintendo type. So most of the games I play are related to Nintendo. <3

(Asked by @mirajane01040-duskwoodmemes) Do you play... Minecraft?

I used to play a lot of Minecraft, but nowadays not so much, and if so, then only the mobile version. This is fun for in between and dispels the boredom. I even started building Duskwood several times, but never finished it. xD Well, yes, sometimes I play Minecraft.

Answer a few days later: Yes, I do!

---

(Asked by Anon) If you could be a fictional character, who would it be and why?

Oh, there are a few. xDBut the three main characters for me: Evey Hammond because of V for Vendetta. Harley Quinn because of The Joker. And, of course, my MC because of Jake. 🤭I know, very superficial reasons but I hope they are enough for you, because these are the main reasons xD 😅🤭

---

(Asked by Anon) Hey hbj i'm curiousFamily or a career? 😋

I choose the career.🤭 After that, there is still enough time, and who says that not both work?😉

---

(Asked by Anon) do you like alcohol?🍷

No, absolutely no. Not a little bit.

---

(Asked by Anon) What is your favorite drink?

If I don’t drink coffee, I only drink sparkling water, my entire life. I very rarely drink something different. Water for life! 🧊

---------------------

Either/or questions from you.

(Asked by @duskwood-legacies) -What would you rather see, Northern Lights or sky lanterns?

That’s easy for me🤭 Northern Lights! If you ask me.. that is magical! *-* (Well, unless it’s like “Tangled” and I get a Flynn Rider.. then sky lanterns xD)

---

(Asked by @duskwood-legacies) -Strawberries or raspberries?

Definitely: Strawberries🍓 *-*

---

(Asked by@duskwood-legacies) Do you prefer angst or fluff?

I think it depends on the general mood I’m in.🤔 I think the best is angst with happy ending.😁

---

(Asked by@duskwood-legacies) Milk or cereal first?

Obviously: Cereal first! 😂🥣

---

(Asked by @justubi) Would you rather have a nosy neighbor pr noisy neighbor?

Unfortunately, I have both. xD But if I could choose, I would opt for the noisy neighbor as I wear headphones all day anyway.😂

---

(Asked by @justubi) Would you rather be poor but love your job or rich but absolutely hate your job?

One hundred percent and without having to think about: poor and love my job!I could never have a job I don’t like. This is a real horror imagination for me😂

---

(Asked by @kyras-things ) Prefer to write fanfics or read them?

Oh that’s a really hard question for me! 🤔 I can’t really make up my mind, but I think I’d rather read than write myself. With stories of others I can better dive into another world and relax. 🤭Because when I write, five hundred other thoughts always fly around in my head and I have to decide how to write something etc.I love writing but sometimes I wish I only had to think about a story and it would be written on a sheet right away. xD <3

---

(Asked by @leetjep) Would you rather have one eye in the middle of your head or two noses?

I take the eye in the middle of my head. 😂Then I would make the Jake eye as a tattoo around it, which would be really cool.🤭

---

(Continues on new asks)

#It's me :)#personal #hbj talks #about me #have fun lol

21 notes · View notes

onecanonlife · 3 years ago

Text

In which Tommy travels back in time and tries to prevent a nightmare from happening to everyone he knows. Everyone else, meanwhile, is highly concerned.

(fic masterpost w/ ao3 links)

(first part) (previous part) (next part)

(word count: 3,079)

--------------------

Part Six: Karl

This server is kind of weird. He’s only been here a few days, but he can already tell that much.

He likes it, of course. He wouldn’t stick around if he didn’t. He does like it, and there’s a few old friends here already—Sapnap, just to name one—and a few people that he thinks he’s going to become friends with very, very quickly. He’s even already working on building a pizza place, which is pretty neat. A lot of the land around here seems to be kind of a free-for-all. Except for the stuff in—what was it, L’Manberg? Which he has not been allowed to join, but it’s no real skin off his back. Other than that, though, there aren’t a whole lot of rules here. No stealing, no griefing, no going to the End. He’s cool with those.

But still. The place is kind of weird. He can’t describe it any way more specific than a vibe. A general, handwavey type of weirdness. Maybe it’s the people. A lot of the people he’s met have been a little weird. A good kind of weird, maybe, but still weird. Like that Wilbur guy, the president of L’Manberg. Very intense. A good talker, and fairly friendly, even if he didn’t let him join his country, but very intense. Or like Eret, who speaks with an odd kind of gravitas, phrasing things just so slightly more formal than the usual. Or like that guy who was pretty much naked. Quackity, he thinks. He seems like an interesting guy to get to know.

And then there’s this kid. TommyInnit.

“I need a favor,” Tommy says, apropos of absolutely nothing.

Karl’s just messing around with the pizza place for the moment. They’ve only got the foundations built so far, but Eret and Punz have both offered their help, and he’s looking forward to getting the place off the ground. Every server ought to have a pizza place, because pizza is the superior food choice. But he wasn’t expecting Tommy to come over to him, much less start off the conversation like that, and he’s feeling a little bit caught off guard.

What he knows about the kid doesn’t amount to all that much. From what he’s gathered, he’s loud, a little irritating, and a bit of a con artist. Not too weird on the exterior, but this? Right now? Is definitely a little weird, if only because the guy’s just marched up to him and asked him for a favor despite the fact that he’s only known him for about three days, tops. Which, he’s happy to see what he can do. The kid seems fine enough. But it’s weird that he’s asking him, specifically, for something, right? Instead of one of his friends? Of which he seems to have many?

“Um, that probably depends on what it is, but sure, I guess,” he says.

Tommy nods. He’s staring at him with some of that same intensity that Wilbur hit him with when they met. Which he supposes makes sense if they’re brothers, like he’s heard, even though Tommy didn’t present any of this attitude when they first talked. But then, first impressions aren’t always accurate.

“It shouldn’t be a big deal, I don’t think,” Tommy says. “I just need you to ask someone something for me. Simple, yeah?”

Again, he wonders why Tommy is coming to him with this. But he shrugs, leaning against the partial wall he’s gotten built. “It still depends on who and what, but I can do that. What do you want me to ask?”

Tommy stands straighter. “You know BadBoyHalo and Skeppy, yeah?” he asks, and Karl—still can’t see where he’s going with this.

“I know Bad and Skeppy,” he confirms, raising his eyebrows. Tommy takes that as a cue to continue.

“I need you to persuade them not to build somewhere,” he says. “Can you do that?”

“Probably,” he says. He’s hedging a little, but he thinks he’s justified. Tommy seems to be dancing around something here, and he’s not sure he likes that. “What exactly do you want me to say?”

“There’s a little bit of land over near” —Tommy scrunches his nose— “near Punz’s, I think—or, wait, is that—I don’t know if he’s—actually, it might be closer to Fundy’s? I can’t remember if—” He breaks off for a second, narrowing his eyes, looking away. But then, he looks back. “Nevermind. It’s not in L’Manberg. There’s a few little lakes and shit. Past where Purpled’s UFO is. You know where I’m talking about?”

“Um.” He tries to picture the area and comes up with a hazy approximation. “Maybe?”

“Alright, fine. Look, I’ll show you on a map if I have to. But the point is, I need you to talk to Bad and Skeppy, and I need you to get them to promise that they won’t build in that area. No building, no digging, no nothing. Skeppy’s gonna want to build a house to the north, and that—that’s fine. They can build wherever else they like, but that spot up there, that’s a no-go, alright? No one can dig around there, but mostly them.”

This is definitely weird.

“Can I ask why?” he says. “You’re not out to get them, are you? Or is L’Manberg planning to expand up there or something?”

“What?” Tommy says. “What the fuck are you on about? No, I’m not—I’m not out to get them. That’s fucking stupid.”

He holds up his hands. “Well, I had to be sure,” he says. “I’ve only been here a few days, I don’t know who likes who around here.” He pauses. “So, the expansion—”

Not that he really cares what L’Manberg does or where they spread the borders of their land. He may not be allowed to join them, but he supposes he’s not officially with the Greater SMP either. He hasn’t been here nearly long enough to commit himself to a side, especially when there doesn’t appear to be any kind of pressing conflict going on anymore. But if he’s going to argue Tommy’s case to some of his friends—and why Tommy has picked him for this task, he still has no idea—then he’d like to know exactly what he’s arguing for, and why.

But Tommy shakes his head. “No expansion,” he says. “Nothing like that. It’s just—look, man, it’s just bad land. Terrible land. It’s got—it’s got radiation, it has. So no one should go there, literally ever.” He waves his hands as he speaks, gesticulating emphatically.

Karl’s not sure he believes a word of this. But at the same time, he seems so earnest about it, or at least, about the part where it’s bad land, that it could hurt people. Maybe not the radiation bit.

“That sounds really dangerous,” he says, and watches for what the reaction will be, trying to get a feel for what exactly the catch is, here. “Shouldn’t we tell more people about this?”

Tommy jerks, and his eyes go wide. “No!” he says, definitely with far more force than should be necessary for a fairly innocent question. But it’s not really the force of someone caught in a lie and trying to cover his tracks. Nothing like that—he just sort of seems scared. “No, definitely not. It’s not—it’s not dangerous to walk on or anything. Just if you dig down. The—the radiation’s coming from under the ground. So as long as no one digs, or builds their home right there, it should be alright, yeah? Just, just tell them not to go poking around there, man.”

“Alright, alright,” he says, and raises his hands again, placating. “Sure, I can tell them. I honestly don’t know if they were planning to go up there in the first place. Uh, can I ask why them specifically?”

“No,” Tommy says, and does not elaborate at all, despite the obvious invitation to do so. The expectation, even. Which feels a little weird in and of itself, considering that from what he can tell, Tommy does enjoy talking. But nothing else is forthcoming, so he shifts his feet, clearing his throat.

“Okay then,” he says. “Okay. Look, I can’t guarantee anything, but I’ll try my best. I’ll even go with a different story than the radiation, if you want. I mean, Skeppy might want to check something like that out, you know? But as long as this isn’t some sort of plot to hurt them, I’m cool with it.”

“There’s no story,” Tommy mutters, and kicks his shoe against the ground. “‘S radiation.” He doesn’t even look like he believes himself, at this point, but he does look a little pathetic, and he’s got some big, sad cow eyes going on. Karl’s not sure whether they’re natural or just him putting on an act. But he figures it couldn’t hurt to throw the kid a bone, whatever he’s trying to accomplish with this. And even besides, maybe it would be beneficial to be in the guy’s good graces. He already has friends here, but a few more couldn’t hurt, since this server is so incredibly weird.

Weirdness can be dangerous, sometimes. He hasn’t decided yet whether this server is or not. Dangerous, that is.

“Whatever you say,” he agrees, and Tommy’s face melts into open relief when he doesn’t press further. There’s still something about this he wants to know, though, so he presses forward. “Um, but if you don’t mind my asking, why are you getting me to do this? Why not someone like Sapnap?”

He thinks it’s a good question. Sapnap is, after all, their literal son. So even though he knows them pretty well, considers them friends, if anyone’s going to convince them to do something, it’s Sapnap.

But Tommy just shakes his head, narrowing his eyes like it’s the stupidest thing he’s ever heard.

“Karl, pal, I know you’re new on this server,” he says, “but us over there in L’Manberg just fought a whole war against Dream and his groupies. Groupies that just so happen to include a certain pet-killing, fire-starting arsehole. No offense,” he adds belatedly, to which Karl just stares. “So you know, if I were to go to Sapnap myself, or even straight to Bad and Skeppy, they’d assume, and they’d be incorrect, mind you, but they’d assume that I have some sort of scheme in mind. A little plot, if you will. And I don’t. I’ve told you that, and I’m being honest with you. But if they don’t believe me, then that kind of defeats the whole purpose of warning them off, now, doesn’t it? So I thought to myself, well, maybe my buddy Karl could succeed where I wouldn’t be able to.”

He finds his lips twitching into a smile. The kid’s definitely a con artist in the making.

“Okay, you’ve sold me,” he says. “I’ll do my best to keep them away.” He pauses. “I’ve got a condition, though.”

Tommy goes still. “Yeah?” he asks, and it’s back to the tension, back to the intensity, and Karl almost regrets it. It’s strange, how quickly the kid goes back and forth between appearing to be exactly what he is on the surface—a kid—and seeming far, far older than that. “What’s that?”

“When you’re finished with whatever you’re working on up there, I wanna see it,” he says, sticking his hands in his pockets.

It’s the only explanation that makes sense. Tommy has some sort of secret project, one that he doesn’t want anyone else to stumble upon. Sounds like it could be a good time.

Tommy blinks. For a long moment, he is silent. And then his mouth twists into a grin, one that drags like a sharp line across his face and doesn’t really look like a smile at all.

“Sure,” he says. “The whole server might know by then, I don’t know. But yeah, when I’m done, you can come see, Karl.”

For some reason, the kid sounds like he’s pronouncing a death sentence. Which Karl is not going to examine too closely.

“Cool,” he says, and isn’t sure where else to go with this. “Uh, do you wanna hang out for a little while? Or—?” He trails off. The invitation is honest; he certainly wouldn’t mind spending time with him. But the vibes continue to be weird, and honestly, he would be surprised if Tommy took him up on it. He’s fidgeting like he’s got places to be.

And sure enough, Tommy shakes his head again.

“Nah,” he says. “Got places to go, women to see. You know how it is. See you around, Karl.”

And he turns to go. Karl decides to watch him until he’s out of sight, just in case, which makes it a little awkward when Tommy stops after about three paces.

“Actually,” he says, “do you mind if I ask you something else?”

“Go for it,” he replies.

Tommy hesitates. His hands clench and unclench, and his mouth opens and closes a couple of times. Struggling with himself, with whatever he’s about to say, and Karl waits. Patiently, he thinks, even though patience is not one of his strong suits. If ever there was a time to apply a bit of patience, it’s probably now; he has the sneaking suspicion that if he says anything to prompt him, Tommy will simply turn and leave without saying anything else at all.

“How do you do it?” Tommy asks, and his voice is different. Flatter, more tired. Does this kid sleep? “The whole—” He makes a broad gesture, which doesn’t clarify anything at all.

“The whole—?” he says, once it becomes obvious that Tommy is actually expecting some kind of answer to that.

Tommy makes a frustrated sound. “I mean, I don’t wanna spell it out,” he says, even though Karl is of the opinion that is what this situation needs, actually. “But the whole, the whole—look, I know, alright? We had—we found one of your books.” His voice cracks, and Karl feels increasingly out of his depth here. It’s almost like they’re having two entirely different conversations, because he has absolutely no clue what’s going on now. “So I know. And I get it if you—if you don’t want to talk about it. But it’s so—it’s just so fucking much, and I feel like there’s too much to keep straight, and there’s so much to do to make things right but half the time I’ve got no idea what my next move needs to be, and it’s—it’s just hard, man. So how do you—how do you keep it all together? I’ve tried writing some shit down, but it’s not helping all that much.”

“Uh,” he says. He doesn’t know what to do with that. This feels like an incredibly personal question, and he’s not even sure what the question is, he thinks. Is he even the one the kid wants to ask? Is he confused? Because Karl sure feels confused, so that would make two of them. “Huh?”

He tries to think of what book Tommy could be referencing and comes up empty. He likes to write things down, admittedly, places he’s been and people he’s met and stories he’s learned and collected, but he doesn’t have anything on him at the moment. He’d been planning to start afresh here. Maybe build a little library or something. Nothing too fancy.

“You know,” Tommy says, insistent, and he shakes his head.

“I really don’t,” he says. “I’m—look, I’m really sorry, but maybe you’ve got me mixed up with somebody. I’ve only been here a few days, and I haven’t really gotten to write anything down yet. Sorry, man, I don’t think I can help you.”

“But you—” Tommy starts, and then stops. He takes a few steps closer, and Karl has to resist the sudden urge to match him step for step, to move backward. There is a light in this kid’s eyes that he can’t place, one that’s almost like—something. Something that shouldn’t be, and he doesn’t have the words to describe it in any other way than that. But then, Tommy leans in, scanning his face, and makes a startled sound. “Oh, shit. You’ve got no fucking clue what I’m talking about.”

“I don’t,” he agrees, and wonders why that makes Tommy look like he wants to vomit. The light is gone, and he finds himself relaxing marginally.

“Oh fuck,” Tommy says, and steps back again, running his hand through his hair. His eyes are wide. “Ohhhh fuck. Fuck, shit, I—I’m too early.” He says the last in a whisper, as if to himself, and then repeats it: “I’m too early.” And Karl watches in horrified fascination as the kid visibly gathers himself, taking all of his emotions and stuffing them away somewhere in what is the most impressive display of repression he’s ever seen from someone under the age of eighteen.

“Are you—good?” he asks, because he’s confused, but he’s not a monster. Tommy’s obviously dealing with something here, and maybe that something is far out of his wheelhouse, but if he’s equipped to help, he will.

But Tommy backs up another few steps, pasting on a smile that shakes and wavers.

“No, no, I’m good,” he says. “Just, just forget about all of that, yeah? You’re right, I got you mixed up with someone. Happens all the time, since I’m so incredibly popular. So I’ll just—I’m just going to go, now. Sorry to bother you, Karl.” And then, he waves, a sad, pathetic motion, and stalks off, his steps quick and rushed. It’s a retreat. Karl would go so far as to say that he’s fleeing.

“You’re not a bother,” he says, but the kid’s already out of earshot. So he goes with his original plan and stares after him until the splash of red and white is nothing more than a dot in the distance.

He looks back to the foundation of his building. His first mark on the server. For a second, he feels so discomfited that he considers calling it a day and going home. But then, he shrugs it off. In the end, it’s a whole lot of not-his-business.

Though he hopes that whatever Tommy’s grappling with, he manages to get through it. He seems like a good kid.

#mcyt #dsmp #dream smp #dsmp fic #karl jacobs #tommyinnit #/rp #cw swearing #cw vomit mention #cat writes fic #long post #time travel au #c!tommy's trying his best #and that's all i'll say about that

32 notes · View notes

sanstropfremir · 4 years ago

Text

episode 9 baby!!! dear lord that was a lot!!

frankly, i'm still in shock that i full on manifested an opera stage, AND it was a rock opera stage at that! plus i got a jazz stage AND a taemin stage??? if they’re pulling out all my favourites now then what on earth are they gonna do in the finale??? this was a very overwhelming crop of stages, i thought i was going to be prepared, but oh no i was not prepared. i'm just going to get right into it because this one is gonna be long and i have many words. i'll discuss in airing order first, and then put my personal rankings for this round at the end.

btob

costume

changsub, you absolute king. spectacular. stunning. incredible. zoot suit riot playing in my brain on repeat. will i finally get the zoot suit revival of my fucking dreams instead of this current drab ill-fitting suit trend? for those who are wondering why in the fuck changsub is dressed like that and what on earth i’m talking about, the specific cut of suit that he’s wearing is called a zoot suit, which were popular in mexican, black and italian american communities in the 30s and 40s, until they were outlawed by the united states war production board as a fabric rationing method as part of the war effort in 1942. there was a huge amount of mob violence surrrounding the wearing of them (there were actual zoot suit riots) as they were direct counter culture fashion to the predominant drab trends of white americans at the time. i'm actually very impressed they got a proper (modernized) cut of zoot suit instead of just putting him in an oversized one; there are actually specific structural differences. the pegged trouser legs, large should pads, and knee length single breasted jacket are key features, and they were often in much more flashy fabrics than a pinstripe, but they get points for effort. i wish they had put all of them in zoot suits but he’s playing the ‘lead’ actor so i will begrudgingly forgive them.

eunkwang those are the stupidest sleeve garters ive ever seen i love them never take them off. they’re like someone decided to repurpose a suspender in the worst way. excellent. i do love that they’ve got three of them in oxford saddle shoes, another great touch.

love the three piece and the fedora* on peniel. it's also in a relatively close period cut; waistcoasts (vests) were generally cut much higher in the neck pre-war, we only start seeing the neckline slide down in the 60s (i think? i don’t remember when exactly). also love to see a proper sleeve and jacket length, it's good practice to have at least a finger’s width of sleeve cuff visible ahead of the jacket sleeve when hanging at rest. also looks like there’s french cuffs on everyone, which is also great.

minhyuk in his slutty lowneck shirt....thank you. in addition to the zoot suit revival i would also like a revival of those ultra low necklines on mens’ shirts from like 2010-2011. i don’t think those are the same boots from the backdoor stage but those are some beautifully cut boots. i also loved the little details of his crewmember look, especially the chunky watch and the string bracelets; those are super realistic, i know so many crew with them and i had several for many years. and who doesn’t love a visible button fly?

none of any of the other costumes are period in any way shape or form but i’m forgiving it because there’s several layers of meta in this stage, and they explicitly based it on la la land, even though we don’t respect la la land in this house. do i wish they had gone more strictly period with at least the jazz club ‘actors’ a little more? absolutely, but i'm not mad about it.

set

again we’ve got a good delineation of the two different ‘stages,’ there’s the club itself in the smaller stage and the soundstage set in the larger space. you can pretty clearly see all the ‘pieces’ of the set on the soundstage, especially the obvious set painting techniques on false prosc frame and the window facade from that first little scene. also the you can see the castors (wheels) on all the setpieces too, which is another nice little versimilitudinous** (triple word score!) touch, as old hollywood movies were made still using theatre stagecraft techniques.

i love how the visual shorthand for ‘this is a set wink wonk’ is just...leaving a ladder on stage. i see it all the time and it's so funny. it doesn’t always make sense because as soon as there’s actors on set the ladders are the first thing cleared because actors cannot be trusted, but yes there are always ladders, so. also psa ladder safety is no joke, please be careful on ladders.

nice streamline of the mnet deco into the club. i’m consistently surprised at how well the designers have been able to mask it or use it to their advantage, because in the normal kingdom stage lighting it is SO obvious and stylistic that it always sticks out.

i'm going to ignore the fact that they implied changsub and miyeon were drinking wine out of martini glasses.

lighting

no complaints, it does its job. everything is visible and super clear. love that the ‘scene’ changes are made through the lighting, it's a really simple and effective device to change atmosphere. purple/blue/amber are the most flattering colours on human skin and that’s why you see it so commonly in stage lighting. also blue/lavendar is the best way to show nighttime/moonlight.

really nice and subtle projection work, especially with the billboard bit and the blue moon sign in the club. despite being obviously meta/’world breaking’ it’s actually very seamless and fits well into the flow of the stage.

sound

i love love love the big band feel in the intro, combined with the piano lead. very duke ellington, as all things should be.

no complaints. i love big band. i love eunkwang’s voice. i have nothing else to say.

staging

i LOVE this movie within a movie within a performance meta nonsense! it's such a fun concept and it is exactly what i wanted ikon’s first round stage to be! i also love to see btob consistently coming up with concepts that are inventive and fun and allow them to showcase their technical performance skills without the aerobics the younger groups are putting themselves through. it provides a really lovely variety and it just goes to show that you can make impressive, dramatic stages without having to be serious or ‘dark.’

i do wish they had leaned into the band director/lead singer with eunkwang a bit more; this could have been a really excellent place for a tap number a la the nicholas brothers or an homage to cab calloway. i know i know this was meant to be la la land themed but la la land is a cheap and whitewashed version of jazz and look me right in the eyes and tell me this isn’t the greatest tap routine of all time. i know i’ve typed this out somewhere before but la la land is just a conglomeration of old hollywood tropes and so stylistically cheap that this would have such a better visual core if they had actually looked back at the real old hollywood musicals like stormy weather. even singing in the rain and an american in paris have such phenomenal visuals and are really beautiful examples of the scope you can pull off with a limited technical capacity and sticking to these old techniques.

now that i'm thinking about it, oh my GOD i would DIE for a lindy hop routine in kpop PLEASE. i know it would never happen because kpop doesn’t like partner dancing and not a single kpop boy has the chops but oh you think fourth gen has too many acrobatics?

this got off track but i think you see my point.

---

ateez

costume

these are really sharply cut suits. and the detail work on the beading??? so beautiful. i'm disappointed that they gave me a rock opera stage without the true ridiculousness of rock opera costuming, because they could have pushed this a lot farther if they really wanted. a tragic lack of gay little outfits, seonghwa’s lace choker is just not enough! two favourite suits: hongjoong’s and yunho’s.

that being said i do actually really like these. this stage is actually very modern opera with a kpop twist and i'm a little surprised by that? i continue to be impressed by the ateez team who are clearly doing their research.

i'm absolutely not going back through their stages to check all the choreography but i wonder if you can track all the ‘wound’ placements to places they’ve been ‘hit.’ i wouldn’t put it past them to have put that thought in but also i’m not expecting that much either.

who is this white grim reaper bdsm executioner chain arm man. where did he come from. i have no idea and i love it.

why is honjoong blindfolded. it was such a fast beat, if youre gonna blindfold someone give it a little longer and some more obvious narrative weight!

seonghwa does that quickchange, runs across that massive stage to the smaller set, and gets into places in like 45 seconds. it's not the hardest quickchange in the world but still, under a minute is fast for any quickchange, especially when there’s travel time involved. i think the fastest, most complex quickchange i ever did was in university which was a 50s cocktail dress into a flannel and culottes with a shoe, hair, and jewelry change in 35 seconds. and that took three dressers. quickchanges are always impressive. the added bonus of this review being later is that i can specifically reference that you can see him book it the fuck off stage in the full cam!

cute moment with the backup dancers dressed in costumes from the previous stages. i'm assuming this is a time travel reference? i'll get more into my thoughts on this in the staging section. regardless, love to see that iconic seonghwa moment again.

set

this is such a restricted space! they really pared down their dancing space with those staircases and ....arms? honestly i have NO clue what these are supposed to be. the only thing i can maybe think of is flying buttresses??? but why?? i mean, i'm 90% sure theyre just there for drama and i agree but i do still have questions.

there’s a lot of moving parts in this set? the buttresses, and the upstage centre staircase. i don’t think the staircase is totally automated because i spotted some dancers securing it in place, but it’s still a moving part. i do really like that we get that expanding upwards energy, because it's really tough to get functional level movement in this kind of a performance, mostly because of its length and because it moves so quickly. so seeing the downward vertical movement and then the upward movement was actually a really nice visual contrast that made use of how tall those fucking ceilings are, and the fact that they had less horizontal space. in sort of similar way to sf9’s jealousy stage, using long, narrow vertical lines really makes it feel like a castle space. the interiors of castles, especially the really old ones, are a lot smaller than you think they would be.

i’ve actually seen that type of small house/tent/thing several times in various types of performances before, but i think this is the first time i’ve seen it used as a time travel device (other than in the say my name mv). aesthetically it's a bit incongruent but i dont really mind because i'm used to watching rock operas that look a lot weirder than this.

lighting

there is so much happening. i have NO clue what the projections are doing. i dont hate it though, so that’s a plus? there’s a clear-ish colour arc even if it does get a bit funky in the middle, which is why the projections dont feel as insanely distracting as some of the other stages we’ve seen.

the climax is a perfect example of how to light a busy stage with primarily red but still maintain clarity on the performers. a little bit of red goes a long way; the spark stage from last week would have looked so much better if they had done what the ateez designers did here.

sound

i know it's only ode to joy, but answer already gets my motor running and then i get so gassed by the guitars and then by the time those vocals come in i'm inconsolable. i don’t know why i wasn’t expecting a rock opera stage but i'm so glad i got that surprise because i genuinely love rock operas so much. it's two of the most dramatic genres in music, what more could you possibly want?

staging

the choreo for answer is so goofy that I'm kinda glad this was mostly terrible mnet boom shots. i love it, but you can't deny that it's goofy. i spotted a couple of moves from their other choreos as well?

choreographing dance fights is just as difficult as choreographing real fights and i think they did a fairly good job here. i think it was a solid mix of dance and conflict that erred on the side of dramatic rather than accurate and i prefer that over trying to be ‘realistic.’ i’ve only ever seen one truly realistic fight scene on stage and that was for a deeply naturalist play (boring and a waste of the medium), but the best fight scene i’ve ever seen was in the prague national ballet’s adaptation of kafka’s the trial where three ballet dancers beat the absolute snot out of the main character with the most beautiful leg extensions. that whole show was probably one of the best pieces of dance i’ve ever seen, holy fuck it was so good.

despite how insane the music and the visuals were going, i actually really liked how sedate this was, on the part of ateez’s performance. there was a really sophisticated and resigned energy from them that is very different from what we’ve previously seen and i think that was a pretty admirable risk to take. reaching the top and then throwing away the crown? especially in a competition where every other stage has involved stealing crowns or royalty and there’s a group competing that got here through that very concept? that shows a real maturity, peace of mind, and foresight that i did not at all expect from a bunch of 22 year olds.

here we come to a very interesting comparison. both ateez and tbz are very heavily leaning on previously established group lore. we all know my thoughts on why it isn’t working for tbz, but here’s why i think it is working for ateez: it's because it doesn’t matter to the audience’s understanding of the stage. i had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on the first time i watched this, but that didn’t stop me from enjoying the music and all the weird shit they were doing. i totally believed that they understood what was going on. there’s a loose enough established conflict right at the beginning that draws us in, and really it doesn’t matter who they're fighting because they win in the end. the key here is that they’re so earnest. they believe 100% in every move they make on that stage. there’s no winks to camera, there’s not a drop of irony. they really deeply care about the ridiculousness of it all and that’s what makes it work. i sure as fuck dont know what’s going on, but i can see that they do, and i trust that. this is what i meant when i talked about convincing the audience you belong on stage in my stage presence post. i’ve never once believed that juyeon was anything other than an idol. he’s talented and very beautiful and he may occasionally stand on that stage like he owns it but it's always as juyeon. as an idol. but when hongjoong flaps around in that gigantic fur coat i 100% believe he’s a pirate captain. I believe he’s a punk rebel leader. i believe him a resigned king. there’s always a level of irony you have to fight as a performer because we all start from a place of disbelief. acting is not just lying to the audience, it's lying to yourself too. and if you succeed in convincing yourself? well, you’re already halfway to convincing us.

i checked it out because i wanted to see if they did the blindfold how i expected them to and was genuinely surprised by hongjoong’s fancam. the boy is EMOTING even when he knew the camera wasn’t on him; that’s a real dedication to craft.

ok i'm finished talking about this stage, this is over two pages in my document, there’s so many things i have not covered here but that’s fine, i'm quite sure any further thoughts will end up out there at some point.

---

sf9

costume

let’s get it out of the way......crop top. crop top? crop top. crop top.

ok, besides the crop top, i think i might actually like the backup dancer outfits more...? i find mannequin adjacent looks really fascinating and i thought there was a lot more they could have done here in connecting the two thematically. i actually think a change of costume on the boys would have been very interesting, especially because there was a lot of inference and direct reference to changes of colour.

ALL the backup dancers are wearing the same wig and i LOVE that.

special mention zuho’s.....jacket? the right idea but it absolutely should have been one of those extreme french cut bodysuits, you COWARDS. don’t come at me with this ‘male version of venus’ if you don’t have your whole torso out! come on!

set

not sure if this is meant to be a department store, a factory, or a white cube gallery. honestly you could make the case that they’re all the same place anyways. more on this later.

i loved the movator and wish they had used it more! that sequence was so good and they could have done some more interesting repetition sequences to further highlight the ‘sameness’/the breaking of that sameness.

i feel like the set could have been used more as a whole? i would have loved to see some mannequin interactions with those boxes, because all they did was dump colour everywhere.

....why did they feel the need to include the rain bit? i know it's likely because it's in the mv and at the 2018 dream concert taemin does perform move in the rain, but with the standing still and the box walls with the words it just looks like a department store ad. which i...dont think is what they were intending?

lighting

nothing really to say here. it has a similar feel to the mayfly rap stage, which is fine because the lighting for that was good. i could tell what was going on all the time and that’s the most important part. notable standouts are the lips sequence, that's fun use of pop iconography and very effective, and the scanning lasers at the beginning.

the repeating sequence in the edm dance break is actually done pretty simply, it's just what happens when you point a camera that’s livestreaming to a monitor directly at that monitor. it's a very cool effect and it was neat to see it used intentionally, especially with the handheld leds.

actually i also really liked the lightbox tables, those were cool.

sound

the remix was fine for the most part, it was about what i expected it to sound like. i did however greatly dislike that unnecessary edm break in the middle. what was the point of that? it didn’t add anything to the overall sound or arc of the stage because it was SO out of place. there was no connective tissue around it.

oh i was also not a fan of the effect on zuho’s mic. no one else had a discernible vocal effect so it felt a little out of place. also for some reason his cadence and tone right at the end made me think of some of the voices that bo burnam uses for his vocal masque sketches/songs, especially repeat stuff, weirdly? took me right the fuck out of it. i listened to it again after i slept and i’m still getting it, so maybe i’m just going insane so best ignore this part.

staging

loved the mannequin tree, not a clue why it was there.

do actually think this is a successful cover because it does what i was hoping it would, which is take move completely out of the taemin context and put it into an entirely new one. however, i’m really struggling to figure out what exactly that new context is? and what theyre trying to say with it?

obviously they went for a ‘show your own colours/individuality’ vibe, like i said in the set section, where exactly is this supposed to be? from the start i get factory/mechanized environment, which is fine and grand because mannequins and making repetitive motions and products and all that, makes sense. but then there’s stacked shelving type units happening and curtains and that combined with the mannequins give me pretty big department store vibes, which is also fine, because that’s still a comment on commercialization and the mass production of product. but then we get to the movator and the repetitive movements of the dancers say pretty clearly factory, but the lighting and projections are very pop art referential, plus combining that with the white set, just makes me think of an art gallery. so now is this a comment on the commercialization and commidification of contemporary art? are they making a statement about being ‘real’ artists among the others who have lost the critical understanding of why pop art was even a thing in the first place? and then the rain bit at the end literally looks like a department store ad, so are they then making another statement that they still are that packaged product? maybe the episode has more clarity in it but i’m genuinely a bit baffled by what the underlying statement is here.

i suspect it is not as deep as i'm making it, but i did say that i was likely to be hyper critical of this stage AND i am a grad student, so here we are.

---

tbz

costume

ok of all the ‘fourth gen’ style costumes we’ve seen, i actually like these ones more than most. i'm not entirely clear on the theme but i'm assuming it's meant to be post apocalyptic, and i'll take that.

backup dancers in black!!! we’re beyond this!!!

this will be a running theme with this stage, but i’m disappointed these don’t have more depth.

set

compared to every other stage, the set here seems especially plain. there’s so little set dec that it's disappointing. i do like the movement of the pieces themselves combined with the blocking; that first slide underneath the arches was slick and i would have liked to have seen more of that.

yea ok the big snake was cool and also a fairly complex build, but the transitions around it were a bit awkward for my tastes. especially the turn around, why did they even show that at all? you have control over what the audience sees, you can totally not show scenic transitions. skz were super smart about hiding theirs in last week’s episode.

also if you have a bigass puppet like that, i wanna see some more movement from it! it doesn’t have to be complex, we literally just saw a kraken balloon arm wave around aimlessly, but at least there was movement! that snake had a long ass body, why didn’t they at least take a pseudo dragon dance movement with it, that would have been such fun to watch with the iridescent scales. there was a lot of opportunity here!

lighting

i don’t hate it but also.... not a lot to say about it on the whole.

there were two really smart ideas here, the first being the front projection section, which i was SO glad to see! i explained in a previous review, but the projections in kingdom are not actually projections per se, because they’re actually massive led screens. there are two common types of projections in performance, rear projection and front projection. rear projection is when the projector is behind the screen, and front projection is ‘normal’ projection. rear projection can produce a crisper image because you have full control of the light values, because the projector is in a separate room from the performance space. but the downsides are that the projector has to be in a separate room from the performance space. so if you’re short on real estate, it's not ideal. front projection is much more common, because the tech is a lot cheaper and easier to access, especially now, and it requires less real estate because you can ceiling mount about the audience (you can move a projector wherever, this is just the most common spot in commercial theatres). but! in order to get an actually crisp image, you have to be really careful with your light bounce. it’s exactly the same principle as how you kinda can't see a projected screen when you have all the lights turned on, but when you turn them off it's a lot clearer. front projection works best in pitch dark, so when you use it in a theatre you gotta be smart about it. i use front projection a lot in my personal art practice as a singular light source, and that’s what tbz did here in that traveling/snake intro sequence. it’s a really fun technique that they used as a good gimmick because it’s not something we’ve seen before, and you get some great shadow effects because the projector is throwing light directionally at the performers (they have it set up close to the floor, it’s probably on a wheeled cart of some kind). however i did not like the snake intro. a bit too cheesy and out of place, especially because the asset quality didn’t match the rest of landscapes that we have been seeing.

the second smart idea, which is partially also a set and blocking thing but whatever, was that final image of the eclipse within the circle architecture with all the members standing in front of it. it was a great shot and a great ending pose, but it felt like a concept photo. like someone had that image as the idea that they then built the stage around, instead of a narrative first and then imagery after.

sound

this remix had SO much promise! those first two minutes were SO GOOD. i love that dirty discordant strings bit, it's gross and right up my alley. but it really fell off in the back half and i'm sad about that.

staging

i'm sorry tbz but.....what did you actually do differently than exo here? with the exception of the continual game of thrones references? nothing here felt transcendentally different from the original monster. and especially coming RIGHT after sf9’s move, which did go beyond its original context. this feels more like an awards show stage cover than a stage at the level of the others we’ve seen just this episode.

again like with the skz stage, there’s no conflict here. no tension. yes they do a great job covering the dance but it just isn’t enough! this is obviously personal preference and i'm sure lots of people liked the fact that it was uncomplicated, but even just a hint of narrative tension could have pushed this into more engaging territory. and if they didn’t want to do that, i would have loved to see them make up for that with extra visual spectacle. this is the no limits round! ikon is putting a full jungle on stage and these are grey cubes!

i think this is a perfect example of what i talked about at the end of my tbz section in my episode four review; this is a good performance, there are good elements at play and good ideas at their genesis, but the core of the issue is that nothing about this is transformative. all of the ideas here are just exaggerations of the original song. fuck, the snake was even IN the mv! and they didn’t even include the best part which is the lip chains! ive said before and i'll say it again; being a good artist has two steps, the first is understanding the material and its context, and the second is elevating the material from that context and synthesizing something new. tbz are really good at the first step, but terrible at the second.

---

ranking

btob - the cleanest and the most fun of the round. everything i wanted.

sf9 - fun and a good cover, despite being conceptually baffling.

ateez - very extra dramatic nonsense with an unexpected dose of sincerity. and it’s rock opera, of course i love it.

skz - fun, with some good thematic devices but generally lacking in arc. also australian accents, that’s an automatic ding.

tbz - honestly the first two minutes of the remix and the costume are holding this above 6th. it just wasn’t fully formed.

ikon - aesthetically this is a great set design and although i do love the opening and closing moments, everything else scrapes me the wrong way. super personal preference here, i’m not expecting anyone else to agree with me.

i feel like my rankings were probably pretty easy to guess if you’ve been around reading the reviews for long enough. i do have very specific tastes after all. i know sf9 ranked first in the episode but i have no idea what the other slots are. i’ll find out when i watch the episode in a couple of days, but i think yea a first for sf9 is fair. i do think its mostly because it’s a taemin song and you have to do something horrendous in order to fuck up a taemin song, but there is a lot of thought and work that went into that stage.

ok i'm done now, sorry this was later than usual, but i was busier and there were four stages that i had to review. also technical difficulties because tumblr is a garbage platform and nothing works properly. comments/questions/opinions always welcome, i know i didn't expand on a couple of points that i could have so hopefully y'all have some thoughts too!

* the type of hat that ~society~ has told you is a fedora is actually a trilby. what peniel is wearing is a real fedora, i felt the need to correct this unjust hat malignment.

** meaning ‘the appearance of being true or real.’ you do sometimes hear it used by normal people, but it’s more commonly used as a descriptor in film and theatre. it’s also one of the five rules of neoclassical theatre, which are: versimilitude, purity of form, five act structure, decorum, and purpose. the most prominent playwrights from that era are moliere and racine if youre interested in what those look like in an actual text.

#kingdom #kingdom review #btob #ateez #stray kids #the boyz #sf9 #tumblr is so broken it would NOT let me save this as a draft #does my constant hyperlinking make you angry tumblr? too bad im gonna keep doing it #i played in a jazz band in school for seven years #which is another indicator as to why i am like this #one of the first songs i remember learning was zoot suit riot #i have very strong memories of yelling RIOT during performances #i will however forever question the logic of our band teacher making us learn a song written by 'the cherry poppin daddies'#christ on a bicycle this is TEN pages #and it took a full eight hours last night and then i did like two hours of editing after i woke up #maybe i should go back to bed #ah i forgot to tag ikon again lmao #ikon #kpop analysis #text #if there are any spelling errrors do not tell me im tired of reading this #im pretty sure this is my longest review so far i decided to hate myself and did a wordcount #its 5.2K you're welcome you better get a snack for this one #i hope this is an interesting read for people ive lost all objectivity at this point #pls enjoy my semi-comprehensible word vomit!

27 notes · View notes

monaownsmyass · 4 years ago

Text

Going Out Of My Mind In My Mind

Requested fic by anon. (If you have any fic ideas or requests you'd like me to write, you can leave me an ask!)

Book: My First Two Loves

Pairing: Ava Lawrence x MC (Emma Price)

Genre: Fluff but make it angsty

Rating: PG13

Warning: Mild homophobic comments

Word Count: 3,611

A/N: Ava is in love with her best friend. She gets lost in her own thoughts while contemplating if she should reach out to MC. Firstly, I wanna say I’m so sorry to the anon that requested this if they wanted a more light-hearted fluff fic lmfao. If you did, please send me another ask lol. Secondly, I wanna apologise to my fellow wlw for including a little homophobia. It’s not that harsh or mean, but it’s there. I thought including it would better portray a realistic encounter of what it’s like to be a wlw accepting her sexuality and exploring her feelings.

Tag list: @ineedskyecrandall @kamilahsayeet2063 @avalawrencefl @lovekamilahsayeed @thequeenkamilahsayeed @heygmicheelle @djtjsmith14 @jjlover01 @soft-for-drake @dopeyouth @alexroyard @satrinadia @toalltheboysididntlove @mypegasifly @queen-arabella-of-cordonia (lmk if anyone would like to be included or removed in my next fics and if you only want to be tagged for certain pairings.)

The first time I realised I was in love with my best friend was... well, I'm not sure if I'm being honest.

But damn, if that's not the most generic, cliché plot ever for every sapphic film and story ever, I'm not sure what is. However, there was always some truth to fiction and I was no exception.

That was my life. Generic and cliché. Popular high school captain of the cheerleaders who lived in the suburbs and came from a middle-class family that has dated the school's famous golden-boy quarterback.

For far too long, everything was normal. Too normal. Painfully normal.

That is, of course, until I started realising I had feelings for my best friend that was very much into guys. As I've mentioned, I couldn't pint-point an exact date or incident but like a hurricane, it was sudden even though there were warnings signs and it was just as destructive, uprooting and destroying everything I thought I once knew, a force to be reckoned with.

It was utter chaos in a seeming perfect picture but for the first time in my life, I felt alive.

Emma Price was my hurricane. Whether that was a good or bad thing, that was up for debate. All I knew was that I wanted her in my life and didn't care if it wasn't the best idea or if it would hurt me. I just wanted her to be with me.

I think that's the funniest thing about finally having a genuine, heart-wrenching, crush on someone. Even the smartest people get dumb, the most cautious are reckless and the logical becomes irrational. Everything that made sense doesn't anymore because why the hell are you doing things you normally wouldn't do for someone that doesn't even like you back?

I learnt that first-hand and I wished someone would've warned me before that. Not like I would've believed it but at least it would be playing at the back of my mind. An echo in the distance, a nagging voice.

I did the stupidest stuff once I was certain I was in love with Emma. I knew I was in love with her but I was in denial and did things I regretted. Dating other people, trying to make her jealous, downplaying my feelings when I saw her with Mason or Noah. Pushing her away and avoiding her instead of talking to her...

It's different, falling for your best friend. Feelings and signals are mixed, emotions are at a high and everything is just one confusing mess of a relationship that was once simple and innocent.

And now, here I was, laying on my bed, staring at my phone as if it would magically tell me the right thing to do if I looked long enough. It didn't, of course. I sighed, wondering if I should shoot Emma a text. It's been some time since we just talked for fun and I missed her sorely.

Procrastinating, I swiped through my home page. My eyes caught sight of a certain app that I opened ever so often whenever I was missing my best friend.

~*~*~

"Come on! Just download it!"

I scrunched my nose up. "Give me one good reason why."

"Because you’re the best friend in the whole world and you'll do anything I say because you love me?" she said jokingly while batting her eyelashes at me but my heart started racing.

I was acutely aware of her hand on my thigh and the way she leaned into me. My breath hitched at her nearness even though we've been closer before.

That was something else about having a crush on your best friend. Suddenly, everything felt like too much. Every word, every touch, every damn single thing was overwhelming and honestly? It was exhausting. Not only is it emotionally tiring, you go into this weird phase of wanting to savour everything they do and you can't help but wonder why you didn't appreciate these small moments before. You can't help but feel as if you've wasted them all.

If she could sense me stiffen, she didn't show it 'cuz she just went on. "Also, it's about a cartoon cat that eats to save the world! What's not to love?"

"That sounds ridiculous, Em," I laughed. "What's the game called?"

"Dopey Cat!"

"Oh god," I groaned. "That makes it sounds much worse."

"Or much better!" She nudged me and I felt a jolt go up my arm. I always wondered if these simple touches felt the same to her. "Do it"

"Alright, alright!" I giggled and surrendered. "Only 'cuz I'm such a great friend."

"Yes! And like I said," Emma leaned in and my heart dropped to my stomach. "The best."

She gave me a slow, soft peck on my cheek and rested her head on my shoulder, clinging onto my arm and leaving me a flustered mess.

~*~*~

I thought about that moment often. More often then I'd like to admit. Every time I did, the same thoughts would always come to mind.

What would've happened if I kiss her? What if I just turned my head right before her lips touched my skin? Would she have kissed me back? Would she push me away? Maybe she'd say she felt the same way about me.

But that didn't happen, so all I could do was wonder.

And wonder I did.

Being in my room like this, doing nothing, it really did make my mind go everywhere. I've dreamed and cried and laughed and screamed and doing nothing was suddenly the most taxing thing I've ever done. Doing nothing when you're in love with someone who doesn't love you back was the most dangerous thing 'cuz they’re already always on your mind but when you're doing nothing, your thoughts just spirals down an endless pit of possibilities that'll never happen and ultimately, you get hurt.

But knowing this, I still let my thoughts spiral anyway. How could I not when the joy and peace I got from imaging a world where her and I were together was worth the pain and heartbreak?

'Cuz figment of my imagination or reality, it didn't matter, she was worth it.

I've imagine us on dates, having picnics, watching movies, going on road trips, sleeping over, laughing over nothing, at the park, at the beach, in a field, in our rooms.

I've thought about us dancing in the living room at 12 a.m., huddled in bundles of blankets on a cold night, singing along to our song while making breakfast, staying up under the night sky and talking about everything and nothing until sunrise, being able to introduce her as my girlfriend and kissing her whenever I felt like.

I've dreamt about us so much as a couple that I've accidentally mistaken reality for fiction but like I've said, there's always some truth to fiction.

~*~*~

"Congrats on being co-captains, guys!" Iris wished us enthusiastically, practically jumping up and down.

"Seriously, you guys totally deserve it," Toni agreed.

"Thank you!" Emma said.

"You two are the best duo! Our cheer squad is gonna rule with you both leading us!"

"Thanks," I said and pulled Emma in for a side hug, feeling goosebumps from the contact. "We do make a pretty great couple."

I immediately froze when I realised what I said and mentally kicked myself.

God, that was so stupid! Why was I so careless? I should watch what I say!

That wasn't the first time I've done it and I was sure it wasn't the last, but just like how Emma was always the only one to mess up my constant, she was the one difference between all the other times and this time.

She had never heard me refer to ourselves as a couple but while I was beating myself up, Emma handled the situation coolly. She slid her hand in mine and squeezed which did nothing to calm my wrecked nerves.

"We definitely sure would! She the sweetest, more caring person in the world and I'd be so lucky to call her mine." She leaned into me and gave me a nudge but all I could do was stare at her, eyes wide and brows raised.

Her deep brown eyes locked onto mine and I swear I could feel the spark between our gaze. And what was that I saw in her eyes? Longing? A hint? I wasn't sure but I could've sworn there was something else I couldn't quite decipher. Then again, I didn't really trust my thoughts. If it could make me believe we were actually a couple, why would I ever trust it in this situation? How could I?

I'm not sure how long we were staring at each other 'cuz to me, it felt timeless. We only broke apart when we heard someone making a retching sound.

"Gross! Go get a room," Lauren said as she walked towards us. "No one wants to see two lesbos in action."

I felt her hand fall out of mine and suddenly, I felt very vulnerable.

"You don't have to be rude!" Iris defended.

"Yeah, Lauren, no one asked," Toni agreed.

Emma spoke up. "Go away, Lauren. No one wants you here." She said it in an almost tired manner. She was done with putting up with her and it showed.

"Aw, protecting your lesbian lover? Cute," Lauren rolled her eyes and walked away. "Whatever, later, losers!"

"Don't listen to her," Toni said after Lauren left.

But how could I not?

"Hey, Ava?"

I could hear the sweet voice of best friend calling out to me but it was distant.

Everything was. I didn't feel like I was in my body. All my senses were numb and I felt nothing. Nothing except the raging white heat within me. I was having an out of body experience in the worst way possible and for a moment, I didn't feel human.

~*~*~

Then Ava was definitely different from Now Ava. Then Ava wanted to cry and run as far as she could. But she couldn't. She was paralysed with fear and embarrassment. Now Ava would've just laughed and called Lauren pathetic. Maybe even give her a nice slap across the face if she felt like it. But Now Ava wasn't Then Ava, so why dwell on the past?

The thing is, I didn't want to. But like that dull throb at the back of your skull after a concussion, I just couldn't ignore it. You tell everyone you're fine, and for the most part, you are. But that annoying sensation, constantly reminding you aren't, that you just couldn't forget. That was that moment with Lauren.

Her words played in my mind on repeat for the first week after hearing it. Months later that voice was softer and less frequent, but it was still there.

A lot happened in those months. The biggest of all? I finally accepted that I was gay. No, not gay, a lesbian.

That word Lauren had spoken with a jeer, the word she used to insult me, the word that was meant to humiliate me, I was that word.

That wasn't the only time I heard it used that way but it was the first time it was used against me. Lauren's words was a constant reminder in my mind that being a lesbian was an embarrassment, that I was an embarrassment.

Then Ava would feel a chill run up her spine when she heard that word even though it wasn't directed to her. And when it finally was, her soul left her body but of course, that would've been too easy. Her soul leaving her body would've been the easy way out. So instead, she was forced back into reality and had to find a way to deal with it.

Now Ava knew it wasn't a bad thing. Of course she did, she was one, after all. So why did Lauren's words still haunt her?

I still had to remind myself that it was okay. It wasn't gross or immoral or whatever nonsense they put into my mind about girls liking other girls. And every time I did, the madder I got. At everyone that has ever said anything about it and at myself.

Because how dare they tell me how to feel?

And how dare I listen to them when I knew it wasn't true?

I was at peace with it now. I was at peace with being a lesbian. But being at peace wasn't the same as embracing it, owning it. And I'm not sure if I ever will, but I hope I do.

I wasn't out to anyone, and god, I've never felt so suffocated in my life. I couldn't even tell Emma 'cuz I was afraid of how she'd react. Or worse, that she'd assume I have a crush on her. And the worst part, that it was true. That I couldn't even deny it.

Not being able to tell your best friend whom you've always told everything to made me feel like shit. It ate away at me every time I was near her and whenever we were talking. I always wanted to bring it up but I never found out how. Maybe I will soon, but not now.

Emma had always been understanding. Even when she didn't get it, she would try. She wasn't quick to judge nor did she so easily jump to conclusions but I couldn't help but think that maybe, she wouldn't be so understanding. 'Cuz that's what you do when you overthink. You worry about things that you shouldn't and you create false scenarios and you just, can't, stop.

Which was exactly what I was doing right now.

I sighed, catching myself before I could spiral any further and rolled onto my side, staring out of the window with my phone abandoned on the bed.

It started drizzling and it was getting pretty cold. I moved to get under my comforter and wrapped the sheets around me.

And once again, I closed my eyes as my mind began to wander.

If only Emma was by my side...

~*~*~

"Oh my god! Ava! Stop!" she would giggle as I showered her in kisses.

"Nu-uh!" I'd respond and wrap her up in my arms, still kissing her wherever I could reach as we rolled around on my bed, playing.

She'd try to escape but since I'm stronger than her, it's useless. She's trapped in my embrace and eventually, she'd give in and hug me back.

We'd laughed about silly inside jokes as we let our hands linger over each other's bodies, not wanting to let go.

I'd pull her tight and she'd rest her head against my chest as the rain outside got heavier.

I'd shower her in compliments and she'd blush. We'd talk about life, our hopes and dreams and ambitions. Our plans and future together.

"Would you still be with me?" I'd ask her.

"Forever and always, baby," she'd reply and give me a reassuring kiss.

We'd waste away the rest of the day together and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

~*~*~

But that was just fantasy. She's not here and I'm not ready. Not ready to come out to Emma, let alone confront her about my feelings for her.

I took a deep breath before opening my eyes, as if I were physically preparing myself to come back to reality. I glanced at my phone screen that was opened at her chat. I picked my phone up and got ready to type but I hesitated.

Should I do this?

I didn't have much of a choice though, 'cuz my phone rang and lo and behold, my best friend, my crush, the girl I fell in love with, appeared as the caller ID.

My heart sank but my stomach filled with butterflies. This conflicting emotion wasn't a rare occurrence ever since I fell for my best friend but that didn't mean I was used to it. Fear and excitement coexisted where it shouldn't which only left me with a familiar uneasy feeling.

I only stopped for a moment before hitting the 'accept call' button.

"Hi!" I heard that cheery voice of hers ring from the other side of the phone and I could feel my insides warm.

Hey, yourself." I smiled. "What's up, Em?"

"Nothing much, I just feel like we haven't talked that much." She paused for a while before adding shyly, "And I miss you."

The warmth spread to my cheeks. "I really missed you too."

I heard her giggle and god, was it the most adorable sound ever. "Good to know. What have you been up to?"

Figuring out my sexuality and pining over you.

"Nothing much, just the usual." Liar. "What about you?"

"Just been thinking about you," she said casually and my heart fluttered.

I cleared my throat. "Any interesting stories lately?"

I heard another heavenly laugh. "Too many!"

She jumped right into it, not stopping once and honestly, I never wanted her to. Her voice in my ear was a comfort and I held onto it for as long as I could.

We talked and laughed for hours and I didn't even notice until I glanced at the clock on my wall. Time passed too quickly whenever I was with her, I always felt like it wasn't enough. It never was.

But then again, an infinite lifetime with her would still feel too short.

"And then, Mack ran out of the house with our dad chasing her in only his towel and shower cap with his back scrubber!" she laughed unrestrained, not holding it back and lighting up the entire world with it.

"Oh my god!" I laughed along with her. "How did she even pull that off? I can't believe I missed that!"

"See? This is why you should come over more often!"

I didn't know how to respond but it was fine because she started speaking again.

"Wow, I didn't realise the time! I should probably head to bed."

"Yeah, me too," feeling disappointed that she was gonna hang up soon even though I let out a yawn. "But I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

"For sure! Good night, Ava."

"Night, Em."

"..."

"Are you still there?" she asked me.

"Uh, yeah?" I replied. "Put down the phone."

"No, you!" She giggled.

I smiled from hearing it. "You!"

"Ugh, fine! Bye."

"Okay, bye bye."

"..."

"Hello?"

"Emma," I breath out in a light chuckle. "Go sleep."

"Okay! Okay, for good this time, bye."

"Bye," I laughed and before I could stop myself, I added, "I love you."

And I shot up, frozen in place. It wasn't what I say, it was the way I did. Soft and vulnerable and definitely not just a friend proclaiming her platonic love to her best friend.

I heard Emma suck in a sharp breath as if she caught onto it too, and the line went dead silent.

"Ava-"

I heard her whisper but I pulled my phone away from me as if it was poison eating away at my flesh and hit the 'end call' button, tossing it beside me. I didn't hear her finish her sentence and I wasn't sure if I could handle it if I did.

Shit!

I hit my palm against my face and slid it down, groaning. How was I gonna face her tomorrow?

Just then, I heard my phone go off. The ringtone I had set just for Emma played and I swear I felt my heart stop.

Nervously, I glanced down at my phone to see the notification that popped up.

'I love you too <3'

Warmth spread through my body and I let out an involuntary grin. I fell back onto the bed with my arm covering across my face.

I glanced back at the message and made a high-pitched squeal that I never in a million years thought would come out of my mouth. Leave it to Emma to make me do things I normally wouldn't.

My heart raced in my chest.

She may not have meant it the way I have but it didn't matter because hearing her tell me she loved me was all I needed.

That was another thing about having a crush on your best friend; the I love you's were up for interpretation.

I placed the phone on my chest and let my arms sprawl out on the bed. Whatever sleepiness I had left my body, there was no way I could go to bed now.

So instead, I let my mind roam but this time, willingly. I let my thoughts free fall through a million different possibilities as the night turned to day.

I watched the sun rise.

And I smiled.

Because falling in love with my best friend was messy and complicated and heart-shattering. But it was also full of excitement and exhilaration and anticipation.

It was rollercoaster of emotions, full of ups and downs and twist and turns and even loops, but that's what made it thrilling. And for the first time in my normal life, I had something to keep me on my toes.

And I wouldn't have changed a thing.

Was my best friend also in love with me? I didn't know. Would I ever know? Maybe, maybe not. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't at least a little curious to know how she feels, be it good or bad. Maybe someday I'll ask her. Maybe I'll get to hold her. Maybe she'll never speak to me again.

But until then, all I had were the stories I've made up in my mind.

(More fics!)

#ava lawrence #ava x mc #ava mtfl #mtfl #my two first loves #mtfl choices #choices #choices: stories you play #pb #pixelberry #playchoices #mtfl fanfiction #choices fanfiction #thanks for reading!

99 notes · View notes

swervingkpoptrashcan · 4 years ago

Text

I Wanna Be Your Favourite Boy - Felix (best friends to lovers fluff)

Summary: No one expected that acting for your friend’s film project would force you and your best friend, Felix, to act on your feelings. (lol)

Genre: Female reader, fluff, best friends to lovers AU, college AU, ft. Hyunjin

Word count: 1.4K

Note: The longer and more edited version of this blurb, the title and story is loosely based on the Rex Orange County song, Best Friend. I’m also a scriptwriting student and I LOVE dialogue so… I love Felix and also Hyunjin, tell me what you think and if there should be a part 2!

“Sorry, she can’t.”

You tear your eyes away from the cute boy in front of you, quickly glaring at your best friend who had just said the stupidest thing you’ve ever heard.

“Haha, you’re so funny Felix.” You replied in a (very obviously) forced joking tone, aggressively mouthing for Felix to cut it out.

You focus back on the boy in front of you, who’s fidgeting as he waits for your reply.

“Sure Hyunjin, just drop me a text and let me know when you need me.”

A smile grows on the boy’s face before he excitedly nods and bids you and Felix goodbye. You turn to face Felix who has a frown on his face as Hyunjin bumbles away.

“Why are you being mean to the poor kid, he just needs help for an assignment. Plus, aren’t you guys like friends?” You questioned.

A pout forms on Felix’s face, as he clings onto your arm and mutters, “Yeah, he’s in my dance team, but… He obviously likes you and I don’t like that.”

You couldn’t control your heart that picked up speed — it was difficult to not crush on Felix when he always pulled things like this, but you knew a relationship wouldn’t ever work out between the two of you. Felix just never seemed interested.

Although everyone thought you guys were dating, Felix would always deny any possibility of a relationship forming, replying with a firm, “We’re just friends”.

So you crack a smile at what he said, thinking that he was just protective over you since you had a terrible track record of relationships. You gave Felix’s head a pat before shoving him off your shoulder, him pouting and rubbing his head.

“Anyway, why couldn’t Hyunjin ask me? I’m totally actor material. Psh, what a dumb excuse. He’s just too scared to ask you out on a date.” Felix grumbled, taking a sip of his tea.

You tutted and shook your head, offering a bite of your cake to Felix so he would stop grumbling. Hyunjin was a film major, and needed a main lead for one of his class assignments. Though you didn’t know much about the film, he was a cute nice boy, and Felix’s friend, so you didn’t see any problems helping him out.

“Just come with me if you’re so worried, I’m sure Hyunjin won’t mind.”

—

Felix looked on in pure rage as Hyunjin talked to you. All Hyunjin was doing was rehearsing with you, demonstrating the actions the male lead — who was nowhere to be seen — was supposed to do.

Stood by the camera equipment and the rest of the crew, Felix was far enough that he couldn’t hear the conversation happening. He could, however, see Hyunjin cozying up to you, stepping close and leaning down to look you in the eye as you struggled to hold back a laugh. When the pair of you look over, Felix quickly returns his gaze to check his empty phone lockscreen.

Unbeknownst to you, Felix was struggling to keep his feelings under wraps. Though it seemed so easy to just confess and call you his, he always saw the look you gave him whenever people asked, “Oh, why aren’t you guys dating”. Thinking you were uncomfortable, he came up with the bright idea to just deny any of these suggestions. The last thing he wanted to do would be to force his feelings on you and lose years of friendship.

Felix peeked and saw Hyunjin leave to talk to one of his crew members, leaving you standing in the shade under a tree, muttering to yourself. He walked over with your favorite drink, seeing your flushed face.

“Tell me again how Hyunjin isn’t doing this to flirt with you?” He questioned, watching you slurp away at the ice cold beverage.

“Hyunjin’s just making sure I don’t mess up his project, that’s not flirting, dummy.”

Felix shook his head at your lack of awareness, knowing full well what Hyunjin was up to.

Except, he really didn’t.

—

“Felix probably wants to rip my head off right now.” Hyunjin states as he leaned towards you.

You held back a laugh, shaking your head, “No, he’s like my biggest fan but it’s not like we’re dating or anything.”

Both of you glance over to Felix who was looking at his phone, unbothered, just like you thought.

Hyunjin tuts and moves away from you. “No one buys that, by the way. As much as both of you say no way, we all know you guys like each other.”

You blushed at his words but couldn’t deny anything. Hyunjin shot you a knowing look before he got called away by his producer.

—

“No way dude, are you out of your mind! I’m not actor material!” Felix argued.

By a stroke of luck (or well, misfortune), the male lead was down with a terrible case of stomach flu. Hyunjin had literally gotten on his knees to beg Felix to save his project, but the boy was stubborn and rejected him. With only a few hours left of sunlight, Hyunjin just needed a new lead to do some lines and Felix was the only choice.

“Please! I know you helped with her lines, why not just act with her then? Isn’t that just perfect?” Hyunjin pleaded, even going as far as to give you his puppy dog eyes.

You tugged at Felix’s arm and he leans down to hear you whisper, “Just do it and I’ll owe you a favour.”

His eyebrows raise at that proposal, and he instantly agrees.

“Hyunjin, you owe me big time.” You smirked.

—

Hyunjin watches the camera monitor as you and Felix complete yet another scene without any issue. Not surprising anyone, the chemistry between the two of you was perfect.

“Okay, last scene, let’s move!” Hyunjin announced.

As the crew packs up, Felix reviews the script for the last scene. You bumble over and the both of you make your way to the next location, a classroom on the other side of campus.

“I can’t believe I have to be all couple-y with you.” You joked, reading through the script.

Felix stopped walking, staring at you. “What does that mean?”

“I mean, if it was with some stranger it would be easier. But you’re like my best friend and I have to ‘almost’ kiss you? That’s so awkward.” You explained, tugging him along the hallway.

While what you said made sense, Felix couldn’t help but feel a pang in his heart, but he could only let out a sigh and get dragged along.

Upon reaching the empty classroom and deciding to rehearse the ‘difficult scene’ before everyone else got there, the pair of you sit criss-cross applesauce on some tables, facing one another.

“You’re still my favourite girl. But...” Felix said.

His gaze was piercing and you had to force yourself to remember that it was just the script. It wasn’t real.

“What?” You asked.

“I wanna be the one that makes your day.” He replied, scooting nearer to you.

His knees bump yours.

“The one you think about as you lie awake.” He leans in.

His hands are on either side of you.

“I wanna be your favourite boy.” He gently places his forehead on yours.

His breath fans across your face.

Your heart is absolutely pumping at this point and you’re sure Felix could feel your heartbeat through your forehead. You blink hard, trying to remember your next line but with Felix literally breathing on your face, it escapes you.

“I want to claim that favour now.” Felix mumbles.

Felix’s eyes flicker down to your lips, then up to your now open eyes.

“Can I kiss you?” He asks.

You could have sworn your jaw dropped to the floor. Were you dreaming? Did you forget some lines? Was this in the script? It didn’t matter what breakdown your brain was going through because you ended up nodding.

A soft smile spreads across Felix’s face, as he closes the gap between you two. His soft lips land on yours and you feel the warmth of his lips for a split second before he pulls away.

Felix sees the dazed look on your face and chuckles, hopping off the table. Right on cue, Hyunjin comes crashing into the room with his trolley full of equipment.

“What did I miss?”

#stray kids #fluff #stray kids fluff #felix #felix fluff #felix lee #kpop #kpop fluff #stray kids scenario #stray kids scenarios #imagine #stray kids imagine #college!au #college au #friends to lovers #au

177 notes · View notes

lovemesomesurveys · 3 years ago

Text

What is your favorite thing to do on your phone? I do my reading on there with the Kindle Unlimited app, which I do a lot of. Do you know what you are going to be for Halloween this year? If so, what? I don’t dress up anymore for Halloween. It’s been a few years now since the last time. Do you still go trick-or-treating, and if so, how old are you? Uh, no. I’m old. Which Disney princess resembles you the most? None of them do. They’re beautiful, I’m not. ha. Which fairytale seems closest to your life story? *shrug*

What color was your first phone? Silver. Was your first phone a flip phone? No. Have you ever butt dialed someone? Yes. What is your favorite pizza parlor? A local one. What is an old website that closed down that you miss? I miss Xanga for surveys. If you're a girl, have you ever had an embarrassing period story? No. ...If so, what happened? -- What was your worst experience in high school? The first couple years were rough. I lost friends and didn’t really have any, lost my grandmother, whom I was very close with, I was struggling with depression and self-esteem... What was your high school's mascot? I’m not sharing that. How much did your senior prom dress cost you? Less than $100 I’m pretty sure. Do you listen to Grace VanderWaal? No. I don’t even know who that is. ...if yes, what's your favorite song of hers? -- Do you watch America's Got Talent? No. Which country has the best accent? England. Which country's flag do you like the best? I like the Swedish flag. Did you cry at your high school graduation? No, but it was a bittersweet moment. Did you cry at your college graduation (if applicable)? It was also a bittersweet moment. Do your parents try to stop you from chasing your dreams? No, very much the opposite. What dreams have stuck with you since childhood? I feel like I don’t have any. :/ Who is a former friend that you wish would come back into your life? I do miss Ty.

Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship? No. Who was your favorite Spice Girl? Baby Spice. Did you ever want to be in a band or music group? No. What instrument did you play in the marching band? I wasn’t in the marching band. If you could take any one type of dance class right now, what kind u take? I wouldn’t. Who got kicked off of your favorite talent show that you were mad about? I haven’t been that invested in something like that in a long time. Do you own the entire series on DVD of any TV show? If so, what? Yeah, a few I Love Lucy boxsets and one of The Dick Van Dyke Show. What show did you always want to be on when you were a kid? Barney and the game shows on Nickelodeon like Double Dare. Can you tell the difference between Mary-Kate and Ashley? Yes. Who is your favorite set of twins? I don’t have one. What is the stupidest baby name you have heard recently? Uh. What is the grossest thing you have ever vomited up? Vomiting at all is gross. Have you ever thrown up in public, in front of someone else? Ugh, yes. ...If yes, was it embarrassing? Yes. Unfortunately, it happened a few times from having too much to drink. Did you ever take your dog to school? No. Name one person you know who had a baby in high school. This one girl I had a class with my senior year. If you had had a baby in high school, what would you have named him or her? I don’t know. If you had a baby now, what would you name him or her? I don’t want to have kids. Do you make lists of names that you like? No. Do you keep a list of your favorite quotes? I mean, I “like”/reblog/pin/share/retweet quotes I like. I did used to do that, though. I used to print out quotes I liked and kept them somewhere or glued them into my journal back in the day. Describe your dream wedding in three words. I don’t plan on getting married. What is your favorite Chinese restaurant? I don’t have one. Does Chinese food make you feel sick? Sometimes. Have you ever seen someone throw up on a plane? No. Do you get motion sickness? I do. Has God ever healed you of anything? If so, what? Yes, some health related things. Do you believe in God? I do. Do you pray, and if so, to whom? Yes, to God (I’m a Christian).

What is the most boring church you have ever attended? I don’t find church boring; I look forward to it each week. What is the most lively church you have ever attended? The one I attend. Do you find church fun or boring? I enjoy it. When was the last time you went to a church service? I’ve been attending regularly for almost 2 years now. When did you learn to ride a bike? I haven’t. What do you hate the most about summer? The miserable heat. What is your favorite thing to do in a swimming pool? I don’t enjoy swimming. Which part of your body is the most muscular? None. Have you ever painted a sugar skull on your face ? No. Are you an artist? No, definitely not. Did you ever take Latin in school? No. What was the last race you ran called? I’ve never participated in one. Do you prefer to run in the street or on the sidewalk? I don’t run. Which major holiday is closest to your birthday? Fourth of July. Does your zodiac sign fit your personality at all? Nope. What is your zodiac sign? Leo. Personality-wise, what do you think your zodiac sign is? I don’t believe in that stuff, so I don’t care. What is your Chinese zodiac sign? *shrug* Do you find kite flying boring? I’ve never done it. It does seem like something I wouldn’t find very entertaining, though. Have you ever released a paper lantern? No. Have you ever walked at Relay for Life? No. What is your favorite musical? Sweeney Todd. What is your favorite musical you have been in? I’ve never been in one. Have you ever seen a Broadway show? Yeah, I’ve seen The Phantom of the Opera. What is your favorite big city you have visited? San Francisco and Los Angeles. What big city do you want to visit? New York and Chicago. Would you rather visit London or Paris? I’d love to visit both. Do you have any interest in visiting Japan? I wouldn’t be opposed. What is your favorite Japanese name? I don’t have one. Do you ever listen to Jpop? No. Who do you go to for advice? I don’t seek advice very often to be honest. I tend to keep a lot to myself and try to figure things out on my own. Do you have anyone you can look up to? Yeah. Who was your favorite camp counselor? My science camp counselor. He was awesome. What is the best summer camp you have ever been to? I’ve never been to summer camp. The two camps I went to were during different times of the year. Do you like camping? No. Would you rather sleep in a tent or under the stars? Neither. Is your bed next to a window? No, it’s across from one. How many windows are in your bedroom? One. What was the name of the first dormitory you lived in? I never lived in a dorm. Who was your first Resident Director in your dorm? -- What was your college's mascot? Not sharing that. If you went to college, did you like the food in the DC (Dining Commons)? Yeah. Have you ever ran a cash register? No. Have you ever worked as a server? No. What is your favorite book? I have many. Did you collect Bratz dolls when you were younger? I had a few. Who was your favorite Bratz doll? I don’t recall. Have you ever done the Bratz challenge on youtube? No. What is a common assumption people make about you and is it true? That I’m brave, strong, and smart. I would highly disagree on all three. Have you ever been accused of being gay? No. Do you think your mom is attractive? My mom is beautiful. Too bad I’m not. What is one thing you can't find right now? Motivation? Energy? Happiness? What was the last thing that disappointed you? Myself as always. Does anyone appreciate your talents and gifts? Ha, what talents and gifts. Do you ever write letters and send them through the mail? No. Would you prefer to read a book or listen to an audiobook? I don’t listen to audiobooks. I find it harder to follow along that way. Do you like the feeling in your stomach on a big drop on a roller coaster? I don’t do roller coasters. What is your favorite roller coaster? Okay wait, I do like Big Thunder Mountain Railroad and the Cars rollercoaster at Disneyland. Those two I can handle and find really fun. Have you ever won a stuffed animal at the age guessing booth? I’ve never attempted to. What is your most severe allergy? I’m allergic to tangerines, but thankfully it’s not life threatening. Like, it doesn’t require an Epi-Pen, I would just have to take an antihistamine. Have you ever had an allergy test at the doctor's? No. Have you ever been to see an allergist? Nope. What was the name of your first imaginary friend? I didn’t have one. What is your favorite board game? I have a few. I love playing board games. What is the best retreat you have ever been on? I’ve never been on a retreat. How and when were you baptized, if applicable? I haven’t been baptized. Have you been baptized more than once? -- Would you rather paint or carve a pumpkin? Paint. Have you decorate for fall yet this year? I didn’t this year. Skeletons or scarecrows? Skeletons. Chocolate or coffee? Coffee. Have you ever had pumpkin spice ice cream? I don’t like pumpkin spice *gasp* What is the best fall drink? Hot coffee. That’s my favorite all year, but a hot drink is especially nice in the colder months. What is your favorite drink to order at a coffee shop in the fall? I loved the toasted graham and butterscotch lattes Starbucks used to have but stopped serving for some reason. They did have an apple crisp macchiato this year that was good, though. Do you own pumpkin earrings? No. Have you ever walked through a haunted house? Yes. Have you ever asked someone to be your valentine? No. What was your favorite video game to play with your brother? Mario Kart. What computer game did you used to play all the time? The Sims is one of them, which I still do now and then. What does your name rhyme with? Bethany. Does your phone screen freeze a lot? That doesn’t happen.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

2 notes · View notes

asian-hero · 4 years ago

Text

Taking the Space Out of “Girl Friend”

A/N: Okay, since no one is requesting Momo, aka the woman who stole my heart, I’m taking this into my own hands (also, kinda wanna write a poly relationship with Momo, Shouto, and (Y/N) so let me know if that sounds interesting)

Summary: Momo Yaoyorozu is the perfect girl. She’s smart, pretty, kind, and she can even make any non living thing with her quirk. What else could you ask for? Although, she could stand to gain the ability to read the room better.

In other words, you attempt to tell Momo how you feel about her, only for her to assume you mean platonically. You know, as a “gal pal”

Words: 2,668

“Momo, I like you,”

She looked up from her homework, starring at you quizzically, “Oh, well I like you too!”

You sighed, shaking your head. “No, I mean I really like you. More than a friend,”

Pausing, she furrowed her eyebrows together, something that, while normally you found endearing, now you found outright annoying. How could someone look so cute and be so smart, yet be so dense when it came to confessions? Before you could even take it back, she smiled at you, and you could’ve sworn that you felt a beam of light shining from her.

“I think of you as my best friend as well! I’m so glad you told me!”

Feeling your eye twitch, it took almost every inch of self restraint to not just kiss her right then and there, to show her that you wanted her more than as just a “best friend.” Unfortunately for you, you both had no nerve to do so, and you also didn’t want to risk it. So, you feigned a smile, reaching out and patting her hand.

“Yeah, best friends.”

That was three weeks ago. Three weeks ago that you tried to tell Momo, your “best friend” and resident goddess of class 1-A that you liked her. No, not as a friend, though you didn’t mind being that. You wanted to tell her that you liked her romantically, but every time you try to, it either ends up with you losing your nerve, or her taking it the wrong way. No matter what you did, it seemed like she thought you were just being a good friend, all the compliments and cuddling and hand holding, all because you were a good friend. At first, you thought she was just trying to be nice and reject you kindly, not wanting to jeopardize your friendship, but after multiple attempts and questioning the rest of the girls, but now you’re wondering if she’s really just that oblivious to your advances. Either way, you were so close to pulling your hair out.

This is what led you to your current situation: laying out on your best friend Todoroki’s floor while you complained about the woman who seemed to live in your head rent free.

After your daily attempt to get Momo to realize that you had a crush on her had tired you out, you sought out the one person who would let you rant to your hearts content without judgement. Since this was a regular occurrence for you to just waltz into Todoroki’s room, it was no surprise to him when you slammed open his door, kicked it shut, and slumped down onto the floor.

After a few beats of silence, he cleared his throat. “So, Yaoyorozu?”

Your obnoxious groan was all the answer that he needed. Setting down his pen, he turned around in his chair to face you, or, your corpse-like state that you’d taken to.

“Are we going to sit here in silence or are you going to complain?”

Lifting your head up, you sent the boy a particularly nasty glare. You could see the ghost of a smile appear on his face, amused that he’d gotten a reaction out of you. Lifting yourself up, you flopped back down, this time on your back. As you stared up at the ceiling, you let out a lengthy sigh.

“This has got to be the tenth time I’ve told her that I like her,” Rubbing your face, you let out a frustrated sound, “No dancing around the bush, no being coy about it. I straight up told her that I like her, and she always tells me that I’m being such a ‘good friend.’ ”

“Ah, that’s rough.”

You snorted. “Thanks, Zuko.”

His response was throwing a crumpled piece of paper at your face. Sputtering, you sat up, sticking out your tongue in a childish manner. Once the two of you settled down, you frowned.

“Seriously, though, how many times do I need to tell her ‘I like you’ for her to get it? I mean, it’s not like I know if she even likes girls, so maybe I’m just being pushy. Oh my god, Todoroki, what if she doesn’t like girls? I could be making her uncomfortable and—“

“(Y/L/N), stop,” Seeing your panicked state, he moved closer, making sure that he gained your attention, “You’re being ridiculous. If Yaoyorozu didn’t like you she’d tell you. She isn’t that cruel.”

Tilting your head back, you took in a deep breath. “I know that, but I can’t help but feel like that.”

The two of you sat in silence for a while, neither of you sure of what to say next. In all honesty, you were just glad that he was there with you, because you’d probably end up spiraling if it wasn’t for him. As much as you loved Momo, you were starting to get a little tired of pursuing her. You didn’t know just how much more you could take of her obliviousness. As you sat there, getting sadder by the minute, Todoroki finally spoke:

“We don’t have school tomorrow, right? Why don’t you just invite her on a date, and you can tell her how you feel,” He flicked your forehead, “With a bit more emphasis on the romantic part of your feelings.”

Rubbing the back of your neck, you looked towards the floor, feeling yourself grow hot. “I don’t know, what if she doesn’t even want to go?”

You could tell that he was starting to grow annoyed, with the way his breathing changed and his posture stiffened. Before you could even comment on it, he grabbed your phone, typing a quick message to the girl of your dreams. Gasping, you tackled him, trying to wrench your phone away from him.

“What the hell are you doing? Give it back!”

Your attempts were for naught, as he wasn’t even breaking a sweat trying to keep you away. A few seconds later a message was sent, asking Momo if she wanted to meet you at a local cafe, just the two of you. Looking as your message went from delivered to read, you let out a cry of embarrassment. Slamming your phone down, you pointed a finger at the boy.

“I can’t believe you! What makes you think I’m ready for this?”

He looked at you as if you were the stupidest person on the planet, “You’ve been trying to tell her for weeks! How is this my fault?”

“Yeah, but now I have to tell her without the crutch of ignoring her at school! If it were with a bunch of people, then I’d have no problem, but since it’s just the two of us—“

You were interrupted by a quiet ping coming from your phone. Hesitantly, you reached to pick up the offending object, carefully reading Momo’s message. After a few more seconds of silence, you felt yourself sink back onto the floor, sounding similar to a balloon losing its air. Your hands went to cover your face, not wanting anyone, specifically Todoroki, to see your embarrassed state.

“So,” He cleared his throat, unsure of how to proceed, “I’m assuming she agreed?”

“I’m meeting her at ten,”

He raised an eyebrow at your behavior. “Isn’t that a good thing? Why are you acting like she just rejected you?”

“Hey, Todoroki, I’m gonna need you to do me a huge favor,” You completely ignored his previous comment, too busy in your own thoughts instead.

“What is it?”

Looking at him directly, you spoke: “Turn me into an ice cube and chuck me into the ocean,”

You didn’t get the response you were hoping for, and instead you were chased out of his room and left with your own self-deprecating thoughts. To be honest, you were excited to hang out with Momo, but that didn’t mean you weren’t terrified of what was to come. When you told her how you felt about her, how would she react? Would she feel the same way, or would she just completely drop you as a friend entirely? You found yourself spiraling as you kept thinking of all of the negatives that you didn’t realize when you had passed out.

The only reason that you weren’t late for your “date” with Momo was because she had texted you, like the lovely person she is, saying that she was excited to see you. That was what shocked you awake at nine in the morning, and caused you to take five minutes out of your day to let out all of your panicked energy. You were able to manage, though, as you pulled through and got ready, albeit a little slower than usual, and by the time you were out the door it was a quarter till ten.

By the time you reached the cafe, you noticed Momo anxiously fiddling with her skirt. Walking towards her, you put on your bravest face and steeled yourself.

“Hey! Did I make you wait long?”

She seemed a bit startled by your boisterous entrance, as she jumped ever so slightly from her seat. Once she realized it was you, she let out an adorable smile, one that could melt even the coldest of hearts. “You’re fine, I just got here a little early,”

Taking your seat, you looked at the coffee in front of you. Tilting your head, you looked towards Momo, who seemed to be watching your every move. Once your eyes had met, she ducked her head, her face turning a nice shade of pink.

“You like iced coffee, right? With two pumps of vanilla syrup?”

You were surprised that she remembered your order, after all, the two of you had only gone out for coffee a handful of times before this, and you were usually with the rest of the girls. When you took a sip of the beverage, you let out a content hum, smiling back at the girl. “This is perfect, thanks.”

She seemed to grow even pinker at your words. “Ah, I’m glad you like it! I was worried that I’d gotten the wrong drink, or that it wasn’t the same as you usually get it, or—“

“Momo,” You started, giggling a bit when her attention snapped back to you, “It’s good, really. Don’t worry about it,”

She nodded her head, taking a few deep breaths before drinking her own beverage. As the two of you sat in silence, you couldn’t help that your eyes began to wander. You couldn’t help that your eyes travelled from her own, her beautiful gray eyes that felt almost like staring into a galaxy, to her cute little nose, all the way to her lips, which you guiltily admit that you’ve thought about on more than one occasion. You refused to let your eyes wander any further down, because firstly, you didn’t want to seem like some pervert, you knew your boundaries, and secondly, you knew that you’d end up flustered, and then she’d ask why you were flustered, and then the whole date would be ruined.

While you found yourself lost in thought, you didn’t notice that Momo was staring at you in a similar fashion, though she was a bit more subtle. Through quick glances she wondered just how unfair it was that you could look so beautiful while doing the most mundane things. She wondered how one person could make her feel a million butterflies all at once, and how one person could be at the center of her attention at all times.

At first, she thought her feelings were ones of jealousy. After all, you seemed to excel at anything you put your mind to, and it didn’t hurt that you were pretty. But, after getting to know you better, and hanging around you, she realized that the feeling in the pit of her stomach wasn’t an ugly one, no, rather, it was one of the most amazing feelings a person can experience.

She never did allow herself to tell you about them, though. It was too scary for her, she thought that you’d reject her immediately, and then she’d be left alone. No, she’d rather just keep to herself, where her feelings would be safe, and she could keep you by her side. It was certainly hard for her though, with all of the compliments you’d drown her in, and all of the times you’d remind her that you liked her. It’d get her hopes up, but she’d immediately crush those thoughts. She wouldn’t let herself feel those emotions.

But, in this one instance, with the both of you not so subtly checking the other out, the two of you had reached the same conclusion: you were both tired of hiding.

“Momo, I—“

“(Y/N)—“

The two of you stared at each other for a moment, before letting out awkward laughs. She gestured towards you, smiling comfortingly.

“You go first,”

Looking at her, you calmed your nerves and nodded.

“I like you, Momo,”

Her face grew puzzled, as if she wasn’t quite sure what you were getting at. “I like you too?”

You groaned, shaking your head. Grabbing her hands you tried again. “No Momo, I like you, romantically.”

It took a few minutes for her to process your words, before erupting into the brightest shade of red imaginable.

“You mean—“

“Yes,”

“So, all this time you were—“

“Yes,”

Looking down at your entwined hands, she found herself even more puzzled than before. This entire time, you actually liked her? As in, the same way that she liked you? Was she dreaming? This had to be a dream, things like this wouldn’t happen to her.

As she was dealing with her own inner monologue, you felt yourself grow insecure. The devil on your shoulder was telling you that you made a huge mistake, that you made her uncomfortable. Puling your hands away, you rubbed the back of your neck.

“We can just, forget that this happened. Sorry,”

Momo’s head shot up, and for the first time, you noticed a look of desperation on her face.

“No!”

Your eyebrows furrowed, but you understood nonetheless. “Yeah, I figured as much. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable—“

She shook her head, taking your hand back in her own to silence you. “That’s not what I meant. I like you too,” Even though she felt so vulnerable and exposed, she kept eye contact with you, “In a romantic way.”

It was your turn for your face to heat up. You were either sleeping or dead and in heaven, there was no other way that this could be happening. Using your open hand, you went to pinch yourself. After feeling the sharp sting, you looked back to your intertwined hands, then back at her.

“This is,” You paused, trying to process everything, “Real?”

She giggled at your response. Once you saw her nodding her head, you couldn’t help but break into a huge grin. Squeezing her hand, you leaned closer, so that the two of you were inches apart. You could feel her breathing stop, and it took everything in you to not laugh. As you got even closer, you saw her eyes flutter shut, and although you very much wanted to kiss her, you didn’t want to rush into things. So, you opted to kissing her cheek, your lips pressing against her soft skin.

As you pulled away, you noticed the pout she gave you, though the blush staining her skin lessened the “menacing” effect. Laughing, you pinched her cheek, taking a sip of your drink.

“Maybe on the next date,”

When she hurriedly proposed that the two of you go out again tomorrow, you couldn’t help the warm feeling blossom in your stomach. Smiling, you agreed, wanting to get as much alone time with her as possible.

Though the two of you were inexperienced when it came to relationships, neither of you really cared. After all, you got the girl, and that’s what mattered the most.

#bnha #mha #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha imagines #mha imagines #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #momo yaoyozoru #yaoyorozu momo #yaoyorozu x reader #momo x reader #yaoyorozu momo x reader #momo yaoyorozu x reader

166 notes · View notes

whiskehorange · 5 years ago

Text

Under the Mistletoe

It’s that time of year, so here is the Christmas Special you all deserve for my absence since a month ago & for the few days past Xmas that I didn’t have a charger! I hope you all have a Merry Christmas (or whatever tickles your fancy!) and a Happy New Year!

Jason

The Tree:

You’ve got the widest array of large evergreen trees right in your front yard, so when you hear a large thump at your front door, that’s just Jason and the biggest tree you’ve ever seen. If you focus one the bottom half of the tree, he’ll get the top, and once the two of you are finished, he’ll raise you up so the both of you can put the star where it belongs!

The Baking:

Boy oh boy does this boy love to bake with you. Mainly focused on the decorating, the frosting, the sprinkles, and everything in between, you better hope you have enough baking sheets to fulfill the hundreds of sugar coated Christmas cookies Jason wants to make with you.

The Mistletoe:

A blushing madman whenever you happen to catch him under it. Of course, he’ll never deny a kiss from you, but it just makes him to soft and warm inside. Eventually, he’ll build up the courage to drag you over to the mistletoe and give you a dedicated kiss.

Michael

The Tree:

Like Jason, save the top of the tree for Michael to decorate, if you have one. He probably won’t go out of his way to buy you a tree or even hack you one down, but will make due with whatever his mother left up in the attic. You’ve got plenty of halloween decorations to put on the tree though...

The Baking:

Michael, baking? You’ve got a long day ahead of you. Good luck trying to get him to stay put to help with anything let alone him actually knowing what the fuck he’s doing. If you need any cookies or goodies cut up or diced, he’s your man. But you’ll notice cookies here and there missing from the dish every once in a while.

The Mistletoe:

Avoids it like the plague. Will purposefully walk the long way to avoid walking from under it. You’ll have to put it some where sneaky, like right in the back door and catch him when he walks in. Even then, he’ll give a defeated sigh and eventually give in, picking you up and letting you smother him.

Bubba

The Tree:

Yes! Yes! Yes! Get this boy in the decorating and party planning committee! It’s something nice for the two of you to do and boy does he love decorating. While most of the ornaments mights be bone fragments and other... spare parts, he’s pretty proud of the outcome. But just wait until he gets ahold of the tinsel. It’ll be draped across everything.

The Baking:

Don’t fret about not having any ingredients for yummy treats, everything you could ever imagine is here! And of course, so is Bubba. Decorating and topping off all of the cookies and treats is his favorite part, and he’s going to eventually make his own batch by himself all for you!

The Mistletoe:

It’s hung in e v e r y door frame, and he knows when you walk under one, no matter how quiet you’re walking.

Thomas

The Tree:

He’s always wanted a legit Christmas, but with Hoyt being such a grinch, he never has the chance. But Thomas finds everything about the traditions you show him to be so wonderful. The tree decorating is by far his favorite, even if there isn’t much to hang. Why don’t you both make some!

The Baking:

Oh, you’ve got Luda Mae tickled right to death. It’s one thing that she’s happy to have some time with Tommy to bake, but another to have you helping and shutting down Hoyt’s grouchy ass any time he walks into the kitchen. Thomas might walk out with a few flour prints on his behind, but it’s worth it.

The Mistletoe:

Personally puts it in the door to your bedroom. While he thought about the door to the basement, Hoyt tends to stand there a lot.... and no thanks. So at least now it’s a special place for the two of you to have to yourself!

Billy & Stu

The Tree:

Billy and Stu are definitely the type to get lazy and leave their tree up all year round, but when they do get the chance to decorate, each of you have a different job. Stu gets the lights, Billy on tinsel, and you on ornaments. But you know, most of the lights will end up being wrapped around all three of you, Good luck getting out of that.

The Baking:

Anything that happens in the kitchen turns into a food fight, wet or dry. Christmas music blaring and food flying across like a battlefield. Whatever the three of you end up baking never last a few days either way. From you and Billy taking a few at a time to Stu stuffing them in his pockets, good luck saving any for guests.

The Mistletoe:

Billy typically leave it with one hanging from the most walked through doorway, snaking his arms around your hips from time to time, while Stu always seems to have some stashed in his back pocket. Pucker up buttercup!

Norman

The Tree:

While every suit has their own tiny, simple tree, Norman can’t wait to put up the massive one him and his mother had. It takes a while to fully decorate, especially with some older Christmas music on and the occasional slow dance break the two of you have!

The Baking:

Norman is a decent baker, so he lets you take the lead. Watching over you and taking note of how you make things so he can too. Maybe make a few extra for guests at the front desk? They’ll get a few of the test cookies that don’t come out too good.

The Mistletoe:

Half of the time, he doesn’t notice himself picking through the mail, standing right below the damn thing when you pull him down for a kiss. The stupidest grin sliding across his face as he tries to compose himself.

Hannibal

The Tree:

If Hannibal had it his way, he really wouldn’t decorate that much of his house for the holiday, but if you want to, be his guest! Big tree, little tree, flashy lights, no lights, anything at all and he’s bound to have it up and ready for you to decorate the next day!

The Baking:

He’s more of a cook, but isn’t opposed to doing anything in the kitchen with you. Mainly for when he grabs and puts away things for you. It’s not that he doesn’t think that you can’t put them away, but he’ll just do it. Keep it organized. Besides, you made wonderfully flavorful treats for him to snack on when no one is watching!

The Mistletoe:

Hannibal is, however, very strict in his mistletoe rules. Anytime you walk under it, you MUST kiss him and vise versa. Those things are something that he’ll never overlook in a holiday.

Amanda

The Tree:

She wasn’t too into the idea of all of the decorations and lights, finding herself too busy to do anything, but that would change. It’s pretty therapeutic when she finally gives in to your pleading, especially once the two of you are all done and she can step back and look at something beautiful she’s contributed to.

The Baking:

Also... not really the biggest fan of baking, but doesn’t mind helping you every once in a while when you need it. Put on some music and maybe she’ll consider icing anything. But she’ll have her hands in the cookies jar from time to time.

The Mistletoe:

Doesn’t really avoid it all the time, but doesn’t really pay too much attention to it. She loves all of the attention you give her, but won’t ever make it out as though she wants it. She’s gotta keep up that tough girl look! Save the kisses for when the two of you are alone!

Bishop

The Tree:

A tree? Well, he’s never really had a personal one for his lab nor has ever really... participated in Christmas, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t open to celebrating it with you! Bishop fancies the tree the most, wiring up a few lights here and there turns into the whole ship being covered in flashy red and green lights. Thanks Bishop.

The Baking:

Uhm.. not really his strong suit. He’s wired to know basic recipes from rations and what the had, but that didn’t mean that he was particularly good at it. He’s up for learning, of course, so he can retain the information, though! Although, he feels bad he has no benefit to eating what you’ve made, but he’ll force the crew mates to eat them.

The Mistletoe:

Just one hung up is good enough, one in the doorway to his lab. A lot of people walk through there, but the only one he’s concerned about it you.

Nick

The Tree:

He’s such a dad. I mean, just look at him and how he acts. Nick’s like a kid when it comes to decorating and will stay up all night covering the entire house in anything Christmasy he can get his hands on. He’s got the matching ugly sweaters for the two of you to wear while he absolutely destroys the tree in tinsel.

The Baking:

He doesn’t care what you have plans for making, he’s going to eat it and cover it in any frosting he can find. Nick isn’t the worst baker, but he has fun while doing it, so thats what counts. Even when he takes some to Ward he’s got a goofy smile on his face while talking to that grinch.

The Mistletoe:

You can see his ears twitch and his face go red whenever he catches himself under the mistletoe, but thats only when you give him that sly smile and place a hefty shmack right on his lips. Hey, maybe he’ll take some and tease Ward with it.

Arthur

The Tree:

Arthur has the best time doing just about anything with you, no matter what it is. While the two of you might not have the room for the biggest tree, Arthur makes up for it in enthusiasm. It’s simple decoration, but that doesn’t mean it’s not enough!

The Baking:

Arthur’s got some room for improvement. The days of TV dinners and messy dishes are over, so lets get to baking! It makes him feel like a kid again, and boy doesn’t it feel a bit nice to not have a care in the world for a while. The two of you are bound to leave the kitchen with frosting and icing on your faces, but what’s the fun in clean cooking?

The Mistletoe:

He’s a bit bashful just about every time he even looks at the mistletoe hanging there, thinking about how much you really love him. Even a part of him wishing that you really did, that hopefully none of this was a dream, but if it was, he never wants to wake up. But for now, just come and kiss him!

Barbara & Adam

The Tree:

Even in the afterlife, they’ve still kept up all of the decorating and celebrating for the holidays. It something the three of you can do, even Lydia as well! The tree is the greatest asset of it all, only the biggest evergreen sat right in the corner of the living room. Don’t even get me started on how many ornaments they have.

The Baking:

Thats something Barbara takes pride in with you, Adam will just sneak in from time to time and snatch a cookie until one of you catches him and shoos him back into the basement. Barbara has just about every cookie cutter you can imagine, so don’t be afraid to have her bust them out of the cabinets for you.

The Mistletoe:

Those two will be under the mistletoe for hours, going back and forth, laughing and smiling at each other like teenagers. You and Lydia can’t help but just watch and laugh at them, rolling your eyes like you would at your parents. Eventually, when they’re done, the three of you can have your time under the Mistletoe 2.0 (that ones for hugging)!

#jason voorhees x reader #michael myers x reader #bubba sawyer x reader #thomas hewitt x reader #billy loomis x reader #stu macher x reader #norman bates x reader #hannibal x reader #amanda young x reader #bishop x reader #nick jakoby x reader #arthur fleck x reader #barbara and adam maitland #slasher x reader

695 notes · View notes