#doesn’t qualify as a teenage romance

[theicarusconstellation]

my ex / first wlw relationship (that says enough right there) just sent me a tiktok saying “i never had a teenage romance and i am at peace with that” and i was under the impression that our relationship, while not what we both needed, was still valuable and worthy of the label of former relationship for all its lovely moments because the love was there even if it wasn’t the form we thought it was but okay

[church-of-lilith]

I would like to see the neurodivergent Abbott character notes? 👀

hello anon! for those who don’t know, this ask is in response to this post of mine. and i am here to provide you my notes. they’re long but here’s all my musings about each of the characters and my headcanons for them in terms of neurodivergency.

please note that I am in no way qualified to be making any of these headcanons. i’m not a medical professional i’m a teenager with autism & adhd just out here calling it like I see it.

Gregory Eddie

Gregory definitely shows signs of autism, and this is probably the most popular headcanon of the whole show.

- In canon right now I don’t believe he is diagnosed or ever really thought about or explored the possibility of being neurodivergent. His father doesn’t seem like the type to ever support him getting a diagnosis in early life. Moments that stuck out to me as an autistic person to lead me to this conclusion:

- His relationship with Gritty in the season 2 premiere. The whole “I just don’t get Gritty” thing. It’s a common thing for autistic people to not understand elements of culture that are important to most people. Gregory didn’t understand the hype around Gritty, and didn’t anticipate the negative backlash he would get from his coworkers upon admitting so.

- His ongoing problems with food, most notably in the episode where pizza is discussed. He has stated in canon before that there are only certain foods he can eat because of different issues with texture/temperature/flavor. i.e. “fruit should not be hot.” his boiled chicken sandwich, only eating pure dark chocolate. while I would not make these same choices in my eating habits, I understand having the ick towards certain foods. this is an autistic trait.

- Taking things too practically. Often times autistic people struggle to understand metaphors and take them way too literally. One of the examples of this I can think of in recent times was a conversation he had with Barbara in which she encouraged him to work through his problems. She said something along the lines of “This color does not look good on you.” Referring to the way he was acting. Later, he confesses to the camera that he thought he was dressed nicely that day. Clearly misunderstanding what she was trying to say.

- Having to stay organized with absolutely everything. We see this at the beginning of season two where he attempts to plan every day of the year down to the minute in order to stay in line with teaching guidelines. This, of course, before Barbara steps in and helps him realize this is improbable. Just the way he reacts at the idea of getting off schedule is incredibly reminiscent of how some people with autism become overwhelmed at the idea of things not going the exact right way.

- Gregory also really enjoys sticking to schedules. In the fire episode he tells Janine he has the fire drill schedule memorized. And during the teacher’s conference episode his need to have a schedule in order to feel comfortable is mentioned multiple times.

- In the teacher’s conference episode Gregory and Janine have a conversation about romance and relationships. He expresses that he feels like he is the problem in all of his relationships. That he’s the ‘weird’ one, so different that no one ever wants to stay. As an autistic person this one was extremely relatable to me.

In conclusion I wait for the day his neurodivergence is properly explored in canon. Because I do believe the day will come. And so does SLR apparently because at one point she tweeted an article about Gregory being great autistic representation. And then deleted it (😭)

Janine Teagues

Janine is also autistic, and let me tell you why. It all goes back to her velcro shoes (among other things but just let me have this moment real quick).

- In one of the season 2 episodes Janine talks about never learning how to tie her shoes and still not being able to, so as a result she wears velcro shoes. This is a very common (if not universal) autistic experience. It’s also a sign of childhood neglect but that’s a conversation for another day.

- As we know, she also has a problem picking up on social cues. She doesn’t let this stop her, and often does not have the social awareness to recognize when others are uncomfortable with something she’s saying or the way she’s acting until she is explicitly told so. We see this throughout the series but one moment that stuck out to me specifically was in the episode where she goes to Melissa’s house for cooking lessons. When she first gets there she won’t stop talking about her family relationships and doesn’t understand that Melissa wants her to stop talking as she loudly grinds the blender to drown her out. Even Melissa realizes it’s a moot point after awhile and gives up.

- Keeping a proper schedule and staying organized is also very important to her, (not as severely as Gregory) but still notably enough that she would probably get upset at any major variations. During the sick day episode when Ava has to sub for her we see that she has very detailed plans, like.. binders worth of plans. And she keeps her class on a tight schedule with story time, and listening to music, etc.

- Janine has the undeniable urge to fix literally every problem that comes her way. Even if the problem isn’t hers, she is so confident that she can fix it despite anyone or anything logically telling her that hey, maybe she shouldn’t. Once she gets her mind set on something, though, she cannot let it go. She has to be in control of every situation—or at least feel like she is.

Melissa Schemmenti

Probably the next most canon neurodivergent character. Personally I headcanon her as having ADHD, and at this point she canonically has dyslexia.

- Obviously in terms of her dyslexia we have that whole episode where she helps one of her students with difficulties reading.

- The way she talks with the student’s parents about getting her tested/possibly getting a diagnosis and then is clearly upset when the parents react negatively really stuck with me. Obviously when she first realized she was neurodivergent as a kid she didn’t have the resources to figure any of that out. It makes me think that she was initially resistant to getting diagnosed as she grew older (No doctor could tell her more about herself than she could. And if it ain’t broke don’t fix it right?) But at some point when she started teaching she realized she owed it to herself and in some part to the students she would be teaching to really figure herself out.

- Melissa strikes me as someone who is very impatient and gets easily frustrated with herself. But she would never get frustrated at a student who’s struggling with reading or otherwise. She doesn’t know how to go easy on herself.

- The reason I headcanon her as having ADHD is because of the way she self stims in some scenes. One that comes to mind specifically is when she’s arguing with Gregory about pizza and rocks herself back and forth.

- In one episode Melissa also has problems hearing things. It’s not mentioned again that I can remember but the auditory processing issues can be a sign of inattentive adhd (although if anything I’d say she shows some signs of both inattentive and hyperactive)

- Melissa’s obsession with firetrucks is something I would be remiss not to mention here. It’s a delightful hyperfixation and I love her for it. Her insistence on sharing this knowledge and trying to get others to enjoy her hyperfixation also screams neurodivergence to me.

Ava Coleman

Ava definitely has hyperactive ADHD. I see this a lot in the way she talks and acts.

- One of the most common signs of hyperactive ADHD is impulsivity. I would say that she makes a lot of impulsive decisions, specifically when it comes to shopping. In early season 1 we see her spending all of the school’s extra money on a large sign, for example. She also has a LOT of clothes to the point that she has her own business selling them. She also jumps into pyramid schemes with great ease.

- Another sign of that is talking excessively (and also at greater speeds). Ava talks pretty fast at times, and is always the first one to jump into a conversation with her thoughts. She has a hard time waiting her turn in conversations.

- The way she acts with the students in the episode where Gregory sends Micah to the principal’s office makes me think that Ava can relate to being ‘the problem child’ when she was in school. Her being hyperactive (unable to sit still, talking incessantly, acting impulsively etc.) makes sense under this lens. Her teachers likely wouldn’t be able to recognize her ADHD and would label her a problem, meaning she probably spent a lot of time in the principal’s office as a child herself.

Barbara Howard

My general analysis of Barbara is that she has OCD and suffers from repressed lesbianism. Both of these are rooted in her extremely religious upbringing.

- I do believe that a lot of Barbara’s OCD comes in the form of fixating on the rightness vs wrongness of things. And that this stems from her religious upbringing. An example of this is with Tamika’s mom and her utter fixation on the woman freely using profanities. This is wrong, so the woman must be immoral, and that’s a problem. When she actually gets to know Tamika’s mom and realizes that she’s actually a pretty great person, she doesn’t know how to comprehend that until Ava puts it into perspective for her. This can apply to herself too, (not wanting to roll around in the mud with melissa or having a crisis learning she’s been in the wrong with lighting her candles on school grounds.)

- Her interest in religion and the church borders on compulsive. This is why she’s very overtly religious, (introducing herself as a woman of god to anyone who will listen etc.) From a very young age I imagine that she’s had the idea of morality and being right instilled in her, which developed into this obsession as she got older.

- Barbara also seems very comforted by following a routine. She and Melissa have had the same spots at their table for years. She goes to the same place to get her nails done every week.

Jacob Hill

I do believe that Jacob suffers from an anxiety disorder of some kind. And also possibly autism but I’m less confident about that.

- Jacob comes across as a very nervous person. I suspect that this may come from his childhood although we don’t know much about it. He strikes me as a kid who was never really heard. That he’s always had a lot to say, but always somehow faded into the background when talking to parents/family. Him joining improv would add up with this, as it would finally make him the center of attention and force people to pay attention to him after being ignored by those closest to him for so many years.

- Similarly to Janine he’s not great at picking up on social cues. He doesn’t understand that people don’t appreciate his infodumping about random topics until he is explicitly told so. We see this most highlighted in the desking episode where we meet Zach for the first time and see his methods of helping Jacob stay on track of the conversation and prevent him from straying too far off topic

- He talks fast which is also something attributed to anxiety. It would also add up if he did struggle to get all his thoughts out as a kid as I suspect. Talking fast is a habit he’s grown into as an adult, so that no one can interrupt him or talk over him. If he gets all his thoughts out he doesn’t have to worry about not being heard.

- In a recent episode he talked about having night terrors, which definitely connects back to having anxiety. (Although we don’t know now frequently he has them or if that was just a one time thing). The way he reacts to the thought of Abbott turning charter also screams chronic anxiety to me. He loses it because it’s a situation he cannot anticipate.

Mr. Johnson

“Is the single most well adjusted man I’ve ever met.”

[forgiveness-in-the-misery]

I think a lot of people don’t know how to handle a show growing up along with them.

People debate at length or talk about how they stopped watching shows at certain points because it lost its innocence.

This happened especially with Buffy. A lot of people managed through the college years but fell off soon after, others left with Joyce’s death or with Buffy’s resurrection.

And it’s fine, the show was made with the ability to stop watching at the end of about any season and be relatively content. And when I was a teenager I hated the seasons post high school, because they went into topics I had no real way to relate to or understand on a personal level. Now as an adult though to see Buffy struggle with adulthood it’s a total fucking mood but also so much more.

Buffy is a superhero and people tend to want to see superheroes as shiny and happy and perfect and strong. Buffy is a character who was told before she turned 18 she would die as most slayers have before her because they seldom lived into their 20s. She threw herself into being a slayer more and more because it was expected of her and she slowly began to realize that maybe she couldn’t ever be normal as she had hoped.

She didn’t get summer jobs, she couldn’t date boys at school, being a cheerleader or joining a sports team, sleepovers and dances became something she struggled with or had to literally fight to enjoy for a single second. College was something she wasn’t prepared for in the least and it was an early warning about how in no way is this character prepared for the adult world.

The creepy asshole she has sex with was a walking red flag. A lot of girls would have known he just wants a one night stand or a sexual thing, but Buffy didn’t. Her only experience with sex and dating and love was Angel; a vampire who was over a hundred years old who wanted to devote his very existence to loving her. She never really casually dated or had a sloppy makeout session with some dude. So for her she assumes this guy she has met cares about her, that he wants to pursue a romance with her, but he doesn’t and it leaves her feeling violated and confused.

This is the first sign we really have that the show no longer has training wheels and we are moving away from a campy story about a teen juggling classes and saving the world. We are now seeing what does a hero do when they aren’t saving the world?

We see her struggle with bills and payments and home repairs and upkeep, making sure she can keep custody of her teen sister, making funeral arrangements, trying to find a job she both qualifies for but also can pay enough to cover bills. We see the shit that you often don’t see in these stories and I think a lot of people were uncomfortable with the reality of it.

The same issue came with shows like Steven Universe, once Steven is a teen, once he’s about 16 and we get stories where he’s angry about the childhood he was robbed of, when he finds out about all the physical trauma he’s endured in fights that once seemed light and magical now drag in a sense of crushing reality and this darkness seeps in that we are watching a traumatized teen who is realizing he isn’t normal and never will be. He won’t ever graduate high school or go off to college with his friends and he can’t pursue a career due to lack of education and there is a fear of being abandoned by his friends due to this. He frantically proposes to his closest friend because he needs somebody, he is scared of her leaving and him being alone.

I love these stories and I love watching them grow and change, because even if at the time you don’t relate to it there will come a point where you re watch these seasons and episodes and have a better understanding of the characters and the struggles they are going through.

[scarefox]

Not some random american guy on MDL trying to explain to me that BL aka ‘Boys Love’ (not a fixed, International term btw!!!) means:

it must be a series, can’t be a movie (a series that has a movie prequel? not a BL anymore)

must be targeted at teenagers only

has to be romcom plots, nothing serious or dark

since it has ‘Boys’ in the name it always has to be about teens or at least tweens, never can a BL be about grown up men in their 40s (Old Fashioned Cupcake??)

can’t be 1 8 + since that is po.rn then

oh yea and IN HIS OPINION KinnPorsche qualifies as BL but he doesn’t recognises it as 1 8 + (even tho that is the official rating?!!??!?)

reminder that ‘Boys Love’ is really not the best term for this genre since a lot of productions don’t fit ‘boys’ (age) or sometimes not even ‘love’ (romance). ALSO Thailand calls them Y-series, and not even Boys Love (Y = yaoi) and Japan has only one term (I think BL?) but throws literally every subgenre in it.

[thewriting-corner]

Tropes I Wish I Could Beat With A Stick

If there is one thing I love, it’s uselessly analysing and picking apart stories. However, there is one moment in many stories wheree I simply cannot keep reading or watching because there is that One Trope™️ I despise with my entire being. Today I will be sharing a list of tropes that fall under that category, because I have not formally written in about a month and no longer feel qualified to give advice lol. I am also procrastinating taking out the trash, if anyone is interested lol.

Age Gap in YA

Will I ever shut up about this? No, I will not.

There comes a point in life where you are mature in life and can engage in a romantic relationship with someone 5+ years older than you, yes. I agree. But this matureness(?) does not happen at 18. It has become grossly normalised in YA, ESPECIALLY in fantasy, to have these huge age gaps between the barely legal MC and an emotionally immature immortal. I’m sorry, but that doesn’t strike me right. It’s disgusting. If you find a 17 year old dating a 30 year old gross, what makes you think a 17 year old and a 500 year old with the face of teenager is better? There are so many implications to immortality that ya fantasy books just refuse to acknowledge, not just in regards to romance, and I hate it. Please stop.

Pretty Privilege

This may just be my Ugly Girl In High School trauma coming out, but there is no trope that gets on my nerves more than this. I get why we write pretty MCs. There’s nothing wrong with that. But if the plot wouldn’t work if the MC were not conventionally attractive, that makes me want to slap someone.

There is this Christmas movie starring the Mean Girls actress (not Regina George or Amanda Seyfried, the one with brown hair) where Santa gives her the power to stand up for herself. Now, I recognise this as a very powerful message and am all for it. But throughout the entire movie, she says really honest (and by honest, I mean she calls people out for being mean and such) things that, while, again, I recognise as a good message, would’ve gotten her fired the first time she spoke if she wasn’t hot. And that makes me SO angry. Sure, pretty privilege can be used to your advantage irl too, and anyone is free to write it. But as someone who did not have a “glow up” until 18 and a half, and had guys actually skip me while saying hello to every. single. girl. in the room, that trope has always rubbed me the wrong way.

Miscommunication

Can we please normalise talking about our feelings and saying when things bother us? Because I am so done with that being used as an excuse for the climax or important plot point. If you cannot have one tiny conversation about your feelings, what makes it logical that this relationship will last in the long run? Sorry doesn’t fix not being honest, and when it happens in books, it is usually SO clear that the characters wouldn’t change if they were real people.

On-and-off relationships

Okay this may just be from me watching Teen Beach 2 the other day, and as enjoyable as that film is, the script was 100% written while the creator was high. I have zero doubts about this. BUT IT BOTHERS ME SO MUCH when the couple just break up and get back together, especially over a short period of time. First of all, what kind of message does that send to viewers and readers? “Yes, if you’re constantly having to break up because your boundaries are being stepped over and your needs not being met they can STILL be the love of your life even without absolutely ANY character development!” And second, if a relationship can’t go three months without a breakup, then maybe it’s not a great fit. Just a thought.

Bare Minimum Being The Standard

There’s no other way to say this, but it applies to both friendships and relationships. I’m so tired of sucky friends who barely interact and then “omg their friendship is goals”. Is it? Or is the narrative of the story just making you believe they’re good friends so they don’t have to write compelling friendships and character growth?

This is mostly geared towards the Heroes of Olympus and TLC series. We are constantly TOLD that the seven are friends, but when you really get into the scenes, there really don’t have much friendship-ery interactions outside of what is needed for the plot. In The Lunar Chronicles I need no convincing that Thorne and Cinder are best friends forever, but Scarlet inviting her and Kai to her wedding in Stars Above? Seems like a stretch, tbh. And obviously, they were at war and Scarlet was kidnapped for about 800 pages, and they could have become friends later, but in the actual series there really isn’t much to be said about them being friends.

[bluedalahorse]

a personal post about my aromanticism and loving fanfic

So I’m aromantic and asexual and I’m having a moment of introspection. (I’m also procrastinating, to be fair.) I’m going to share my thoughts just to get them down. Maybe this will resonate with you or maybe it won’t. I’m also not sure what the solution is or if I should be looking for one. Who knows?

There’s something you see in aromantic (and aroace) discourse on fanfic and ‘shipping culture, where you have one aro argument that’s like “I’m aro and have no interest in reading about romantic relationships whatsoever; I wish fandom wrote more gen and was less ‘shipping focused.” And then there’s the polar opposite argument, which is “I’m aro and I adore ‘shipping characters and reading about romantic relationships; it’s nice to read about other characters having those feelings even if I would never want or feel that kind of thing in my life.”

I want to address a sort of middle ground. I think I trend toward the “aro who ‘ships my faves and likes a well-executed romance in a story” category, but I’m gonna qualify that. If I’m reading something with a romantic pairing—whether the pairing appears in the story as a part of it or takes absolute center stage—I want the characters outside the pairing to feel three-dimensional and real and have their own unique relationships to the characters in the pairing. Nothing irks me more than say, a BFF or sibling or family member character, who has a complex and lore-filled relationship to one of the romantic leads in canon, getting reduced to a cheerleader puppet who only talks about the main romantic pairing and how great they are. Honor siblings and other family members with side plots. Let BFFs have absolutely shitty days once in a while, so that OTP Person A calls up OTP Person B and says, “Sorry I have to cancel our date tonight, BFF had a shitty day and I gotta be there for them.” And then we get to spend some fanfic time with OTP Person A and their friend in a way that enriches and adds to the overall story.

Going into an example in more depth below, using a canon I haven’t talked about yet…

Note: I am gonna talk positively about Heartstopper for a moment, but it is merely as an example. A lot of what I say about Heartstopper can be applied to other canons and fandoms, so please try to understand it as an illustration of something broader rather than its own particular thing.

Balancing relationship types is one thing the show Heartstopper does really well, in my mind. Nick and Charlie’s romance is of course the heart of the plot, but each of them has other significant relationships in their life. Nick’s mom supports Nick in his dating life, but you get a sense of the depth and history of their mother-son relationship, and they aren’t always fawning about Nick and Charlie’s relationship together. Sometimes they’re watching pirate movies! Meanwhile Charlie and Tao have some serious platonic BFF heartache when Charlie and Nick become romantically involved—but they also work through it and continue to be really important friends to each other. The narrative suggests that maybe Tao could be a little less overtly cranky with Nick, but it never shames him or portrays him as inappropriate or immature for worrying about Charlie getting into a significant romantic relationship. Tao has valid reasons for feeling the way he does—he doesn’t want Charlie to get hurt after what happened with Ben, and Tao doesn’t want to be left behind himself.

Tao’s story would have been so valuable for me to see as an aromantic teenager (who didn’t have the word aromantic to describe myself) who was always worried that my friends were going to leave me and I was going to end up alone. I would have known that it was normal and not a sign of immaturity to feel sad and fearful when my friends started dating and had these new relationships they were fluttery about. I would have had scripts for talking through my feelings with my friends and reaffirming our friendship with one another. As it was, I turned a lot of negative feelings inward on myself, and I tried often to push people away before they could push me away. I think if I’d had more characters in my life like Tao and Charlie, it would have done me good. (And no, Tao isn’t aromantic, but that’s important in its own way. Alloromantics also deserve complex friendships in their lives that provide support for them but also require an investment in time and attention! Allos are allowed to care about their friendships too!)

—also like. Tao has stuff going on his life that doesn’t relate to Nick/Charlie. He loves movies! To the point of having obnoxious opinions. He hates the MCU and also sports. (Same.) He’s developing a crush on Elle. He’s at the age where his mom is a little embarrassing and tells him to leave the door of his room open. He comes up with verbal comebacks when he’s being bullied because he doesn’t like bullies but he also doesn’t like physical fighting. He’s got ridiculous hair and a hat. We could probably get more even depth to his character but like, when he’s in a scene he feels real to me. Not like a cardboard cutout.

Now, I enjoy Heartstopper’s canon a lot. I’ve never read a fic for it. I have written some fic for Heartstopper (that I really need to finish.) Part of the reason I haven’t gone deeper into the Heartstopper section on AO3 is I really value that canon dynamic where friendships and romances feel balanced and the secondary characters feel like they have a three-dimensional existence outside of the Nick/Charlie main pairing, and I want that balance in a fic, too. I’m a little worried that if I do go looking, there’s going to be a lot where romance overwhelms a story that I already feel has this good balance of romance and not-romance.

But I’m not sure how to search or filter for the balance I want. Moving away from Heartstopper specifically (because like I said, I haven’t gone into the Heartstopper section on AO3) sometimes I’ll be looking for fics in a fandom, and I’ll try try to look up character study for a secondary character, or something from a secondary character’s POV. Secondary characters are often my favorite characters in a canon. But that’s no guarantee that the fic isn’t going to be 150% centered on a romance. It’s common to see fics where it’s a main pairing/more popular pairing through that secondary character’s eyes, or the secondary character will be involved in a romance of their own and the fic will be overwhelmed by that romance.

Every time I try to bring this up to another human, I get story recommendations like…

Here, do you want this story with no romance in it whatsoever, like we’re not even acknowledging that anyone could have romantic feelings, to the point where things feel kinda borderline queerphobic? (Most of the canons I like have multiple queer characters and queer romances, but also lots of friendships between queer people.)

Here, do you want this story where the romance is very sweet at all times and there is zero conflict and zero sex? (Conflict and sex are not the problem, my friend. They are not the thing I’m trying to get rid of.)

Here, do you want this story that purports to be centered on a friendship or family relationship for one of the members of the OTP, but it’s just a family member or friend fawning over how much they love the OTP and think they’re sooooo sweet and romantic?

None of which is what I’m actually looking for. Like, how do you filter for fanfic that isn’t really strict genfic but also doesn’t feel 150% centered on a main pairing gazing into one another’s eyes all the time? Maybe there’s an obvious way to search for it and I’m just missing it. This is why I wish AO3 had a way of distinguishing between “this pairing (romantic or not) is one of the central focuses of the fic” and “this pairing shows up in the fic and feels like an organic part of the universe but the writing isn’t overwhelmed by it.”

Fandom tends to foreground sex and romance in fanfic and fanart and meta, which is one of the things I find joyful and at times a little bit subversive about fandom. Like, I genuinely love us! I have had so many OTPs! I have done some very enthusiastic and strange things in my life because of ‘ships! And, at the same time, it can get overwhelming when some of my favorite secondary characters are depicted as purely ancillary to a romance between romantic leads in a story, or if the protagonist of a fic has nothing in their life that isn't somehow partner-involved. Like… we can have romantic stories where this isn’t the case. Right? I’m not making this up?

In conclusion, I don't want romantic love to conquer all. Instead I want to stop thinking of romantic love in terms of conquest, and start thinking of it in terms of coexistence with other loves.

Some notes that I couldn’t work into the structure of this post, but am just adding at the bottom in bullet points:

One of my favorite tropes in media doesn’t really have a name, but it’s when the best friend character and the love interest character find out they have a ton in common, and end up using that knowledge to team up and (lovingly) mess with the protagonist. More of that please!

I wonder to what extent this shapes my interest in problematic/fraught pairings in a canon (coughsargustcough) because those stories by their nature necessitate the weighing of different types of love against one another and ask the protagonist to carefully consider their values re: relationships. The thing is that in a problematic/fraught relationship the results of this weighing are almost always gonna be tragic. But I think more functional, less fraught pairings—the kind you root for to stay together instead of enjoying as something that leads to a glorious trainwreck breakup—could also benefit from this weighing of relationships and values. Because those negotiations between relationships don’t always have to be tragic. Most humans who have romantic partners can also have friends and family and colleagues they value. Those processes of balancing out the people in your life are part of being human and existing among other humans.

I wonder what extent this has been shaped by a shift over the years in genres I enjoy. I used to be much more into tracking like, Big Genre Stuff (think Doctor Who) but now I’ve gotten more interested in stories focused on interpersonal dynamics and characters coming to understand their own identities in relation to all the people around them. I used to be able to look for like, “casefic” for a procedural show and get a balance of kissing and crime solving I enjoy. Also in Les Mis fandom I somehow found the people who wrote the right balance of romance, friendship, and extremely nerdy historical puns + footnotes, so that was awesome. But like… in canons already focused on interpersonal relationships, how do you ask for more interpersonal relationships? Or calibrate the right balance of interpersonal relationship types using the AO3 search and tagging system?

This feels really complicated when I weigh my aromantic queer identity against others’ more allromantic queer identities, because I know that seeing all the romancey things (first dates! kisses! anniversary gifts!) represented for their pairings can be really empowering and helpful and full of joy. I know that “care more about platonic friendship!” can be weaponized as a microaggression when homophobic people use it against queer people ‘shipping queer ‘ships, so I don’t wanna come across that way. At the same time I’ve also struggled with amatonormativity in queer spaces, even when I’ve found that queer people on the whole tend to value friendship a lot more than straight people. So like, rest assured, I would like to see the cute romantic anniversary gifts happen too! I really would. IT’S CUTE. I just wanna see that balanced out against like, best friend characters who feel like real people and have their own stuff going on, even when they support a fic’s lovey-dovey protagonist. Does any of this make sense or am I just rambling at this point?

Oh, Blue. Write the fanfic you want to see in the world! Doing that already. Doing my best, anyway. Still wish I knew how to find more of the fics I was looking for.

[karouvas]

andrew nico and blue classic

Hi sorry I got to the asks for this so late this one took a long time, I actually realized I had the opportunity to post it on your birthday but I didn’t quite manage but anyway consider this a belated birthday present if my rambling tangents qualify as such to you <33

Blue Sargent

three facts about them from my personal headcanons: 1) her favorite musical is Wicked and she identified with Elphaba 2) I think she has some sensory issues which is why she’s so particular about certain textures of clothing, food etc. and I definitely like to read her as neurodivergent 3) I hc her as non-white in Maura’s side I especially like picturing her as desi which you could say is projection and you’d be right, but generally I think of her as a brown girl.

a reason they suck: her judgmental streak is real, and she’s very proud and yes these things together can influence her towards being a bit of a hypocrite.

a reason they are great: Idk how to pick just one thing I am infamously Not normal about this girl she remains my favorite ya book girl to this day.. But I really love how passionate Blue is and also how kind of self-possessed she is about her own feelings, she’s very in tune with her own individuality and what she desires out of life: seeing the world, exploring, finding ways to help make the world better, having her own path that she determines not a set destiny, wanting lasting meaningful relationships and friendships that are maybe more intense than is technically healthy etc. she searches for something more and doesn’t entirely know how to get there/what that path is but she’s intent on carving out that path for herself and finding that knowledge, and then the area she’s least in tune with herself about is like, romance and particularly the way to feel about Gansey in the first few books which I really like as a dichotomy ((and it’s part of why Bluesey reads like a lesbian narrative cough)), that passionate nature is also what allows her to be extremely loving and brave and creative and I generally love that about her. Also this is an unpopular opinion but the way she thinks and her personality does feel like a very real teenage girl, I think Maggie did a good job writing her voice in that department and that wasn’t ever a problem with how she wrote Blue the problem with how she wrote her was, as I say later, the fact that Maggie wasn’t interested in the follow-through of her arc/how Blue’s personality which was very fleshed out, would change/develop outside of happening to develop certain relationships. Oh I also love how curious she is I love character who constantly want to know what is up with everything which will continue to be a theme in the other asks … I’ll quit while I’m ahead here I love her but also really am due for a reread which is why this is coming out so incoherently.

a reason I relate to them: I relate a lot to her mindset of loving whimsical things but striving to be practical in my pursuit of whimsy, I also just relate to a lot of her personality (besides how brave/risk-taking she can be which is not me at all lmao) and thought processes she’s one of the chars I most identify with in fiction generally… and a lot of it can be tied to the fact we’re both 4w5’s tbh. I also was raised mainly by multiple maternal figures I strive to emulate and grew up not thinking well of male authority figures <3

(what I consider to be) the top tier otp/ot3 for that character: for otp it’s Bluesey obviously my parents who raised me… I really really love Blue x Noah too but it’s more elite tier. Imfor ot3 there are actually 3 options which I find really appealing I think Gansey/Blue/Noah Blue/Gansey/Henry and Blue/Gansey/Adam all have excellent ot3 potential but I’m going to go with the latter because it’s the messiest option and I like to have fun. Three incredibly fucked up bisexuals who were obsessed w each other in thematically fascinating ways.

five things that never happened to that character that I believe should have happened: 1. I loved the parts of Bllb that focused on Blue learning about her powers with Gwenllian and that dynamic as a vehicle for her becoming in tune with being a mirror/witch should have continued as a storyline in TRK the way Adam and Ronan’s abilities continued to be relevant to the story, the conclusion to the arc could’ve still been Blue learning about the Artemis-tree situation but i wanted more reflection from her on what these powers are going to mean for her going forward and not just “oh yeah I guess it makes sense I’m part tree” 2. Her arc towards becoming less judgmental shouldn’t have just been “I guess I need to not be so mean to rich white boys” I wish she had actually gotten to grapple with her mindsets about class and gender more, and obviously I adore her dynamics with the boys and the 300 Fox way ladies but I wanted her . 3) I love Maura but I kind of wish Blue had been allowed to be mad at her about disappearing at the end of TDT for longer after she had come back (her moments of anger before Maura gets back are incredible I love her interactions with Calla when they both are missing her too), especially since Bllb is when Persephone and Jesse die and the anticipation of Gansey’s loss are really building and getting to Blue so I think it would be really natural for her to double down on transferring those emotions to her mother who is safe for her to be mad at. 4) I do kind of like that Artemis himself wasn’t that relevant to Blue when he showed up lol, but I still think Blue should have gotten to actually know him and deal with some of her feelings about being abandoned by him that were definitely There in earlier books. She could get to let out her feelings and get to know him a little and then still feel unimpressed by him / that he’s not a real guardian figure to her the way Maura Calla and Jimmi are and Persephone was. That would work for me <3 5) Generally TRK failed to resolve what Blue was going to do with her future aside from the Bluesey/Sarchengsey of it all (both of which I love but come on) I haven’t read Greywaren yet but I am glad there was some lip service to that and it made decent sense for her char. (Also should be said that my last reread of the first two books was in 2019 so while I like to think of myself as a Blue expert still my memory of some things might not be that sharp.)

five people that character never fell in love with and why

1)Adam —- I actually do like Blue/Adam it’s

the type of pairing where hindsight made me appreciate it more and find it more interesting as it exists in the story. Blue not falling for Adam had multiple factors so it’s hard to pinpoint just one, part of it was definitely that for Blue liking Adam better than Gansey went hand in hand with the idea of her as someone who wasn’t bound to a specific fate, and that wasn’t fair to him (Adam also had reasons to fixate on Blue that weren’t fair to her but this isn’t about his side of things, even though that also added to creating a distance within their relationship which is part of why), so part of it is based on the circumstances around their relationship, also I don’t think necessarily that they’re incompatible romantically personality wise but they definitely both honed in on certain similarities between them and assumed that would mean perfect compatibility when that wasn’t the case. In a different storyline maybe they could’ve gotten there, within the timeline and structure of the story not really.

2)Noah —- Literally Noah said it himself it’s because he’s not alive… yet at the same time from what we know of Noah pre-death he didn’t sound like someone Blue would like much at all, so that makes the whole “I’d ask you out if I was alive.” “I’d say yes.” thing even more tragic, although Blue very much does mean it for the Noah that is right now if He could live.

3)Ronan — this is just on here because I needed more people lol I actually wasn’t sure who to put after Adam. But Blue could never be attracted to Ronan because she likes a particular flavor of fruity pathetic boys like she likes fruity nerdy and pathetic not fruity Ronan is fruity but isn’t the right kind of pathetic for her at all he’s too harsh and fiery, and similar to Blue herself but not in a way that attracts her at all.

4)Kavinsky — She hated him and would never interact with him willingly there’s really not much depth I can add here. Also the way he spoke to her in their one scene in tdt was disgusting the fact for a long time there were parts of the fandom that cared way more about him and the dream pack than Blue and the 300 fox way women Grrr

5)Helen — This is my crack pairing that I felt passionately about in the year 2013 she didn’t fall in love with Helen simply because she didn’t get the chance to. But I think she could’ve if they met like 5 years post series and Blue hadn’t met Gansey yet so.

Andrew Minyard

three facts about them from my personal headcanons: 1. He’s a fan of horror media specifically slasher films (also old movies in general but that’s canon from some of the things he’s referenced in dialogue) 2. Only half a headcanon/generally this is very based on the texts but I do think Nora is right about him being bipolar (something she says in the E.C. But it was a while ago so she used out dated terminology) and based on meta I’ve read from people more well-versed in the subject than myself and far more than Nora, I agree that he’s Bipolar II and has C-PTSD, and is also probably on the autism spectrum. 3. He says his favorite color is black but it is actually blue (like Neil’s eyes lol)

a reason they suck: I mean if I met him in real life I would definitely be bothered by how inflexible his judgements of the world and other people are and by his inclination for violence, but narratively I’m more than fine with all those things tbh.

a reason they are great: am going to refrain from writing an essay here and just mention a few qualities I really like about him: extreme loyalty and protectiveness towards his ‘people’, incredibly intelligent and perceptive in how he reads people and situations, always driven to seek knowledge as a means of controlling circumstances for those he cares about and himself but also just because he’s a nosy bitch, and then I have a hard time explaining some other things especially since you haven’t finished the series but I just think the way he works as a character is fascinating I’m obsessed with his brain. Thinking about him a lot also makes me miserable sometimes in a good way. I also think he’s one of the funniest characters ever. I’ll stop talking now he really contains multitudes to Me.

a reason I relate to them: honestly abandonment issues and emotional repression..Also like the way he always want to know everyone’s business but doesn’t actually like to talk to people (non-medicated) is a mood.

(what I consider to be) the top tier otp/ot3 for that character: Andreil and Kandrew I honestly can’t choose because Andreil is THEE ship and Kandrew is My ship obsession and I consider those two separate categories in a sense, my approach with Pynch and Adansey is similar tbh. And for ot3 Kandreil <33 very non-controversial.

five things that never happened to that character that I believe should have happened: 1) getting on proper meds suited to his actual diagnosis would be nice 2) I want him and Nicky to figure out new approaches in their relationship and generally work to have a better one 3) I think it would be cool if like Neil he later switched his major to something he actually was interested, especially like the idea of him as a film major or a psych major

five people that character never fell in love with and why

1)Roland — So this is a dynamic/character where I have one reaction based on information from the books + extra content (which is basically @ Roland get a job stay away from him!) , and Andrew’s pov of the dynamic is a bit different from mine so I’m focusing on this question from Andrew’s pov. I think Andrew liked Roland because he’s charming and easy to like and treated him like a peer not a kid (which is part of the problem) but it was a shallow kind of liking which was why Andrew saw Roland as a “safe” outlet to explore his sexuality, because there was no risk of him getting too attached which was safer to him emotionally and meant that when Roland tried to overstep his boundaries Andrew didn’t have an emotional weakness for it and could shut it down, and not a massive amount of trust existed but more trust than potentially he would have with other people. Also I kind of think that part of why he was drawn to (/vulnerable to) Roland specifically had something to do with Roland as someone so tied to Nicky, and while Nicky and Aaron were in getting closer and Andrew was placing himself in the protector-not-family role and also everything that happened with the court/meds Andrew would feel flattered / get a type of validation from being able to attract Roland and be chosen over Nicky in a sense, and get a kind of satisfaction successfully keeping it a secret. Honestly I think Roland is for Andrew what Wren is for Spencer in a way (which makes Nicky the Melissa technically), so that kind of itself explains why Andrew doesn’t love him.

2)Matt — I think that Andrew Does find Matt attractive (and is annoyed about it) esp in moments where Matt loses his cool more ex. when he’s picking a fight, is really protective etc. but he would never develop deeper feelings both because of the way they interact based on the structure of the team, the role Andrew played pre series in Matt going to rehab (I don’t remember if this is explained in book 1 or 2 so idk if you read about that yet) etc. and aside from all that Matt just has too conventional a view on morality and is just too close to normal for Andrew to ever be interested enough. However in different storylines pre and during the series or if they met when they were younger I could see them having a fling even if canon-wise it would be out of the question for both.

3)Jeremy — Other than the obvious that they haven’t had nearly enough contact, Andrew would just never be into someone that bubbly and nice they’d never be compatible, and unlike Matt I don’t even think Andrew sees or would under any circumstances see any sort of edge to Jeremy that could make him a bit compelling. And I think it’s vice versa too they don’t dislike each other (Jeremy doesn’t seem to dislike anyone) but they’re not for each other at all. There’s one place where this pairing could happen at all and it’s in the sex dreams yk Kevin has had about it Lolz.

4)Jean — again the thing about contact and then I think across the board in canon and any version of post canon timeline for Kevin and Neil centric reasons Andrew would always hate him. I’m unsure how I think they’d interact if they met outside the parameters of the series, in a Raven Andrew Au I do think Andrew and Jean would have been close while Andrew and Kevin would decidedly Not be close, I don’t really think Andrew would ever view Jean romantically in those circumstances though.

5)Seth — like with Kavinsky this is low hanging fruit Andrew hated him and would never interact with him willingly.

Nico Di Angelo

three facts about them from my personal headcanons: 1. Rick is incorrect about Nico and Reyna not spending time together post boo he’s just insane for that. Nico is constantly spending time at Camp Jupiter to hang out with his sister and his pseudo sister and his brother in law who he likes to scare half to death for fun imo 2. I think he’d really enjoy things like MBTI and astrology he likes sorting and categorizing things and being a nerd see: Mythomagic 3. In addition to his Aquarius sun he’s a Scorpio moon, not decided on his rising yet

a reason they suck: I was completely drawing a blank because I can’t think of anything I dislike about him but then I remembered the tsats excerpts so I guess just being cringe in those is his biggest crime to date. Like I could say the holding grudges thing but honestly I’m a Taurus I get it

a reason they are great: He’s so smart and knowledgable and resourceful and resilient and I love that he’s so powerful while constantly underestimated, he’s also just. He has a complicated moral compass which makes him interesting and I really like that, but fundamentally he’s very loving.

a reason I relate to them: tbh you can copy paste what I said for Andrew p much + additionally when rereading last year I did connect with the way his grief is constantly present in his character post end of ttc, a lot actually :/.

(what I consider to be) the top tier otp/ot3 for that character: I resent this a little but Jason/Nico is definitely the most appealing one to me based on canon content. And for ot3 I Was having fun last year with reimagining part of hoo as a Leo-Jason-Nico love triangle, and Valdangelo has so much untapped potential so definitely the three of them.

five things that never happened to that character that I believe should have happened: 1) for the fact that chb is prejudiced against him to be acknowledged and not dismissed, I’m okay with there being some grey area in terms of him isolating himself because of trauma and that also being a factor, but not him being blamed for the alienation he experiences which is territory canon gets into at times 2) his final scene with Percy in BOO should have been more impactful and less of a joke and we should have gotten a sense of how they’ll mend their friendship 3) what I said before about Reyna and Hazel being largely involved with him getting to feel at home at camp and him clearly visiting them a lot 4) I want it acknowledged that Hades and the Furies and maybe Persephone must have tutored him because he dropped out of school in 5th grade I want to get insight on that experience. Which I fully believe happened but not 100% sure Rick does so counting it 5) I really like the Dionysus therapy thing but Chiron should be made to feel ashamed for his passivity and letting Nico be homeless in pjo

five people that character never fell in love with and why

1)Leo — Rick was simply too much of a coward to let them interact and have the arc of figuring out how compatible they would be.

2)Jason — I think Nico would be resistant to the idea of letting himself *go there* emotionally with another “hero” archetype in the timeline of canon bcs of the Percy thing. I do believe he had some latent attraction to Jason (him comparing Will’s and Jason’s looks in BOO is… telling lmao) and ofc definitely cared for him but it would have taken a while for love-level feelings to develop, though i definitely think they could have since Nico is the opposite of Andrew in that sense that he likes nice heroic boys only lol, and they definitely have points of connection so plenty of potential there. In the timeline of canon there’s way more evidence of Jason having strong romantic feelings/actually being smitten re: Nico which like I said I think was ultimately a good thing that made the dynamic a stand out compared to the status quo of both chars other dynamics, and also just a lot more palatable to me personally since my relationship with Jason as a char is … complicated lol, and I definitely would have Strongly resented a dynamic where the reverse was true in introduction.

3)Frank — he’s dating Hazel and age probably other things too .

4)Apollo — Okay so he definitely had a crush on him in TTC I don’t want that to be true but it is… BOO restated it too in a way…anyway though he would never fall in love with Apollo he hates his actual cocky personality (he’s fond of Lester/Apollo too but it’s the way you’d be fond of a really smelly and badly behaved dog tbh).

5)Octavian — because Octavian’s a little bitch Nico doesn’t have a lot of standards (bcs of the abandonment issues) but he does have Some standards.

[warningsine]

A compelling character-based drama that reveals the interior life of a young trans man over roughly 24 hours in New York City, “Mutt” follows Feña (Lío Mehiel) as he tries to navigate a series of events that would be stressful for anyone. Piling on setbacks that specifically challenge someone still working out how to reintroduce himself to old friends and family members, writer-director Vuk Lungulov-Klotz — who is also trans — makes audiences acutely conscious of Feña’s emotional state at every turn. “Mutt,” which premiered at the Sundance Film Festival, sees the first-time helmer creatively using the medium to illustrate how small incidents can chip away at a trans person’s self-confidence and the strength it takes to stay true to that identity.

Feña’s day starts simply enough, focused on trying to borrow a car to pick up his Chilean father (Alejandro Goic) from the airport. Before long, it becomes a day from hell. He gets locked out of a friend’s apartment. His teenage sister (Mimi Ryder) decides to skip school, experiencing her first menstrual period while spending the day with him. As brothers go, Feña’s uniquely qualified to help her handle the situation. In fact, the night before, Feña hooked up with an ex-boyfriend (Cole Doman), sparking a pregnancy scare that also calls for a visit to the pharmacy, where he hopes to acquire a morning-after pill for himself.

Could so many problems befall a single person in such a short period? It’s a tad unrealistic, perhaps, but easy to forgive, as Lungulov-Klotz cleverly demonstrates how seemingly mundane activities can be uniquely complicated for a trans person like Feña — as when a bank clerk misgenders him and refuses to cash a check that doesn’t match the name on his driver’s license. Each encounter feels genuine and moving, such that everything resonates emotionally. Feña’s identity is constantly on his mind as these mishaps occur. It’s also on the minds of everyone he interacts with because his transition has affected them too.

Lungulov-Klotz has an authentic grasp of New York City — its streets, buildings and locally owned businesses. Each of the locations that Feña visits rings true as a real place and not a film set. Collaborating with cinematographer Matthew Pothier, they create a vision of the city that’s unlike what is usually presented in so many American indies, giving audiences images that are tangible and instantly recognizable, rather than trying to show the city in attractive light.

Mehiel, who’s in almost every scene of the movie, carries it with aplomb and is always immensely watchable. However their performance becomes even stronger when they are playing off other actors with whom they have noticeable chemistry, particularly the charismatic Doman and the heartbreaking Goic.

In an affectionate but also palpably sensual scene, Feña reconnects with his ex-boyfriend, who last saw him before the transition. Fraught with both tension and heat, the encounter begins with discomfort as Feña tries to avoid revealing his body. But as the lovers recall their strong physical connection, the moment becomes as much about discovering Feña’s new identity as it is about two lovers falling into old habits.

There’s a charge to this interaction, which is sensitively filmed and portrayed with tender affection by Mehiel and Doman. Beautifully shot and romantic in its setup, as the two lovers escape the rain to seek shelter in a laundromat, the scene becomes a transfixing moment of movie magic, a modern twist on those larger-than-life moments from the golden age of Hollywood that mixes old-fashioned romance with a sexuality that defies labels.

In queer narratives, the gruff unapproving parent is commonplace. “Mutt” presents something different: Feña’s father is skeptical and questioning of his son’s transition, but also supportive. Adding complexity to the characterization is the culture clash between a traditional Chilean father and his American son. Goic toes the line between those differing states so well, elevating his scenes with Mehiel and making them the most resonant of the whole endeavor.

While Feña’s journey may contain some contrivances, the way this young man adapts to each predicament feels authentic and emotionally potent. That’s a testament to Lungulov-Klot, who succeeds in placing vivid characters in slightly heighted situations — amplifying our connection in the process — without sacrificing the sense of realism that makes “Mutt” so relatable.

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

*insert good title*

by A_Scepter11

Clark adjusted his glasses as he took his spot in the classroom. The first month of school had gone smoothly for him, no drama, no Lex, no people accidentally seeing an alien flying by…

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Clark Kent was a totally normal alien teenage boy pretending to be human. After securing a scholarship, he moved to a school in Gotham, a weird place with too much lead. (Seriously, did anybody care about their health?) And Bruce Wayne, an enigma of a boy, for some reason has taken a liking to Clark.

Together, they got through the ups and downs of friendship… Actually, no. Clark tries to lead a perfectly normal life while Bruce is trying his best to make his life the most abnormal thing that happened to mankind.

Who’s the alien again?

Words: 1106, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: DCU, Batman - All Media Types, Superman - All Media Types

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Lois Lane

Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - High School, Slow Burn, Teenagers, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Communicating, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Author doesn't know how romance works, Author is not qualified to write this fic, Misunderstandings, Author doesn't know how American High Schools work

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/46268479

[natsukashii-journal]

Time worth wasting

Akaashi Keiji x reader 

Fluff

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Akaashi Keji didn’t develop crushes. He’s far too busy with school and volleyball to even think about relationships. While handling Bokuto’s frequent mood swings takes up most of his time, he doesn’t get the chance to develop real feelings beyond friendship for someone at this point in his life. However, the deciding factor for the lack of romance in his youth is that Akaashi is far too realistic to believe that one could find real love at seventeen and anything less than that doesn’t interest him. So, when he first saw the girl who got his heartrate to rise with just a look, he shrugged it off, blaming your dashing smile and beautiful exterior for the unwelcome reaction. He was still a human teenage boy after all.

It had been the first training camp in Tokyo that Karasuno attended. Before their arrival, the hottest topic between some of their teammates was the fact that Karasuno did not only have a hot manager, but they were also accompanied by their co-coach’s cousin, who was no other than y/n y/l/n, current number one wing spiker in the Japanese Women’s Volleyball Youth League. He heard that you were taking frequent breaks from training with your team due to health issues and agreed to help out the Karasuno volleyball club in order to stay in shape for your eventual comeback.

Of course, Akaashi knew you. You’ve been known throughout your whole High School Volleyball Career, as you transferred from an American High School when your parents moved to Japan. The school that you went to was a local Tokyo High School, the Okamisawa. He never met you in person, but during the spring tourney in the previous year, Akaashi had seen you play. Your form and your technique were impressive. It was clear to see that you played on a whole different level than any of the girls and maybe most of the boys your age. You transformed every ball that was set to you into a lethal weapon, while elegantly scheming your way around any defense tactics the opposing team had and not allowing yours to break. He admired you, that was for sure and that day he saw you play he couldn’t help but imagine how it would be to play on your team, to guide the ball into your delicate yet dangerous hands. Usually, the setter is the one to control the game play, however in your case, it seemed as if you were the sovereign your teammates followed, as if each ball was served on a silver platter, trusting that the queen would lead her people. That was the first time that Akaashi longed to look at someone, to be close to someone. Even though your grace was intimidating, he couldn’t help but wish for more. Naturally, he didn’t think that this was qualified as a first spark that could ignite feelings he’d never felt before. When they left the gymnasium in Tokyo that day, you left an impression, but little did he know that this seemingly insignificant admiration would be the cause of something similar to a butterfly effect.

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When Karasuno finally arrived, they were received by Nekoma’s coaches and captain. They were given some time to settle in and were then shown around the gym. That was when Akaashi saw you. He knew that you were a big presence, but he was not prepared to be taken aback by your effortless yet graceful appearance once again. Trying to focus on keeping up his usual cool demeanor, he couldn’t help but steal a few glances in your direction which thankfully went unnoticed as everyone else was already staring shamelessly. He made it a point to try his best and control his behavior around you, as he was sure you didn’t need a full gym of men gawking after you that whole weekend. As all the teams’ head coaches introduced themselves to you, Akaashi couldn’t help but notice how each time Kuroo was leading you, staying by your side when he didn’t have to play. It seemed that he was not the only one to wonder as Bokuto excitedly asked Nekoma’s captain during individual practice: “How do you know THE y/n y/l/n?” Kuroo shrugged and said nonchalantly: “Oh I forget that she’s a celebrity. Her mom and my mom were best friends, and we spent most summers together when she came to Tokyo ever since we were kids.”

“No fair! I want to be that close to her, she’s so hot.”, Bokuto whinnied. Kuroo smirked and glanced at him darkly: “Never say that in front of her. She doesn’t like to be reduced to it.” Akaashi dared to voice one of his thoughts: “Isn’t it intimidating being friends with her?” Kuroo looked up and explained proudly: “y/n is the coolest. She’s not as full of yourself as people might think and she gives great advice. You get used to her being famous after a while, you realize that she’s just one of us. She can be strict sometimes but she’s always fun to be around. Even Kenma likes talking to her.”

“If I’m that fun to be around, why not invite me to spike some of your balls?”, a melodic voice coming from the gym entrance interrupted their conversation.

Instantly Kuroo started blushing furiously, realizing that he was caught in an embarrassing moment. “Hey, hey, hey! So, you decided to join the cool crew.”, Bokuto piped shamelessly. You laughed at his words, a sound of airy and soft tones escaping your lips before saying: “I’m just tired of polite conversation and people looking at me as if I had two heads. I knew that wherever Kuroo would be, was the most normal. So, could I join?”

“Let’s go then kitten. You join Akaashi and Konoha. Bokuto, Lev and I will go up against you”, Kuroo said to your which made You blush a little at the mention of your old nickname. You went up to the Fukurodani players and said with a smile: “Hope that’s okay for you.”

“Sure, that’s no problem.”, Akaashi replied trying to keep his voice as nonchalant as possible. The look Kuroo and Konoha gave him made him realize that he was trying a little too hard which made him seem out of character. He made a mental note to relax and hoped that no one would bring his forced behavior up at dinner. The first ball was served by Lev, which Konoha bumped with ease, sending it to Akaashi.

This was it, something Akaashi had written off as wishful thinking was about to happen. He suddenly thought back to the game he watched a year ago, how Okamisawa’s setter put the ball up high and close to the net. Before he registered it, his body moved as of its own free will as he watched you jump, your back arched elegantly and your arm swinging abruptly to hit the ball angling it in the opposite direction of where the three tallest people of the whole gym tried to block you. Your wicked cut shot seemed so effortless, that everyone had to take a moment and realize what just happened. “That was a very nice set. You put it up the way I like it best.”, You said smiling at Akaashi. Forgetting himself, he immediately started blushing, stuttering his thanks. Now even Bokuto and Lev stared at his unusual response, making him curse in his head. He’s never going to hear the end of this.

For the rest of the short game, the only things Akaashi said were the last names of his current teammates. They cut of the set at 15 to 11 as it was getting late, and they were told to get something to eat at the cafeteria before it closes. When they left the gym, you turned to the setter and his teammates saying: “That was a good game, thank you for letting me join. But please, just call me y/n from now on.” Bokuto’s eyes started sparkling and he kept on going about how you hit perfect balls each time even if he set it up for you. “You and Akaashi had great chemistry from the get-go, that almost made me jealous to be honest.”, he pouted which once again stole a laugh out of you. You nodded and said: “That seems to be a talent of his, synching up to new people that quickly.” Kuroo shook his head and smirked: “I don’t think so, it’s just you I guess.” Akaashi was glad that it was already dark outside, and his red cheeks were camouflaged by the lack of contrast as he said: “You kept hitting each ball flawlessly, I believe it had nothing to do with my setting.” You turned to look at him and said in a serious tone: “Don’t play yourself down like that. You’re good. Own it.”

At dinner you joined Karasuno, sitting down next to Sugawara listening to him as he was talking about how their training went. He asked you where you went during solitary practice and you explained that you played a small three-against-three match with Kuroo and the others.

On the other side of the cafeteria, Kuroo sat down in front of Bokuto, with Yaku joining him. They sat in silence for a few moments, which developed into an awkward contest between Kuroo staring and Akaashi avoiding his gaze. “Why so shy Akaashi?”, Bokuto called out clapping on his back. “Oh man, did I miss something? This half-staring contest seems way too intense.”, Yaku said nervously. Kuroo started smirking his signature half-smile and explained: “I believe someone has developed a crush.” Akaashi felt the heat rising to his face and started stuttering: “I did not, I just got flustered playing with one of the top players in Japan. Nothing else.” Bokuto put his hand up to his chin, thinking: “But you already do that on a daily basis Akaashi, and you never get flustered around me.” Now Konoha was chuckling and said: “Last time I checked, you don’t qualify as being a beautiful woman.” Bokuto seemed to take this comment as an insult, as he complained: “But I am beautiful, am I not Akaashi?” The setter sighed and said: “Yes you are Bokuto, the most beautiful.” The ace nodded solemnly at the assurance and then continued: “But I understand your admiration for y/n-san. She is impressive.” Konoha laughed out loud: “If I didn’t know for sure that Akaashi didn’t develop crushes, I would honestly have thought he might have fallen in love with her. I mean who could blame him, just look at her.” At his words, everyone within earshot turned to look in the direction where you were chatting with Ennoshita, laughing, and smiling sweetly, brushing your hair behind your ear.

They seemed to stare for a little too long when Yaku finally interrupted their daydream: “What do you mean with ‘Akaashi doesn’t develop crushes? I mean everybody does.” Konoha shook his head and said: “Akaashi rejects every girl that tries to get close to him or he simply doesn’t notice. It’s just his thing.” “You make it sound as if girls come up to me confessing on a regular basis. I just don’t have time to think about this stuff right now. Could we now please stop talking about me and my supposed feelings, I’m not some kind of entertainment.” Kuroo smirked and said: “Alright, but if you ever decide to act up on this ‘I was just flustered, not really a crush’, let me know. I might be able to help.”

“That’s never going to happen. Thanks, but no thanks.”, Akaashi said coldly.

[thefanficmonster]

Just Another One

Sequel to: ‘A Little Bit Of Honesty’

Corpse Husband x Actress!Reader (Female)

Warnings: Angst, Heartbreak, Mention of bad past relationships, Swearing

Genre: Angst, Romance, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: They keep proving each other right in the most wrong ways possible. They each want to be guarded even if that means the other will be hurt. Maybe that’s what they want - to hurt one another because they’ve already hurt each other once before.

Requested by the lovely readers who enjoyed the previous fic ‘A Little Bit Of Honesty’. Sorry for the large time gap between the posting of the two fics but I still hope you guys will take the time to read it and if so I hope you enjoy it! Love you all with all my heart, Vy ❤

When you go out of your way to avoid leaving the house your options of entertainment are severely limited and you can’t blame anyone or anything but yourself for it. Today, I wouldn’t have gone out of my apartment even if I was one of those people who frequent the outdoors seeing as how the sky is trying to flood the Earth with all this nonstop rain. It does set a mood for a perfect night in but when you spend all your nights in doing the same thing over and over again, the atmosphere is practically meaningless. And so I ‘ve decided to resort to channel surfing as though I’ll find something interesting on TV that I haven’t yet seen on one of my social media timelines.

I pass several cooking channels on my journey, making a mental note of their individual numbers in case I don’t stumble across anything capable of better distracting me from my boredom and loneliness that’s slowly starting to creep in. I pass by a few movie channels showing teenage romcoms as if to celebrate the start of summer so you can imagine how quickly I moved on from those. Then come the celebrity channels which can often get a laugh out of me because of how pathetic and unbelievably ridiculous they are. And so, I stick around one where there’s a broadcast on a movie showing that’s happening tonight in LA. Oddly enough, despite my anxiety, going to a movie showing has always been on my list of things I’d want to do. This can be considered living vicariously or rubbing salt into the wound that I’ll probably never go because my anxiety and fear of being recognized is too severe. Either way I stick around to watch it.

And man do I regret it now looking at several different angels of a couple of actors entering the venue where they are to be photographed and asked questions by the mob of paparazzi that’s gathered due to the massive event. That in and of itself doesn’t sound - and really isn’t - so bad. However, it’s important to note that the actress in this duo is Y/N. Y/N L/N. My Y/N....shit, sorry, I mean my FRIEND Y/N, her arm linked with whatever-the-fuck-his-name-is who is holding an umbrella above the both of them, shielding them from the downpour of rain that is also taking place in LA apparently.

“The two were seen entering the venue earlier this evening, looking particularly cozy in each other’s presence if I do say so myself. The rain probably worked nicely in their favor.“ The first reporter says, her teasing tone of voice sending chills of anger down my spine as I glare at the screen, hands balled in fists, jaw clenched - all my body’s instinctive reactions to what is being shown to me. I know I technically have no right to behave or feel this way, in fact I should be fucking happy for Y/N and her successful career and the progress in her love life. But damn it how can I?! I was so damn close to kissing this girl! I was so fucking close to falling in another trap, tripping and landing in the embrace of another liar and user, another girl who switches partners more often than shoes. How could I’ve been so reckless to get so close to her even platonically? How did we become close enough for me to 1) show her my face; 2) start inviting her over to my apartment regularly; and how didn’t I notice the kind of messed up person she was all that time.

She was all sweet and flirting and shit a week or so ago and now she’s doing the exact same thing with him! The cameras are capturing them perfectly: every laugh, every exchange of a knowing look or nod, ever smack to his arm when he tells a joke. But what bothers me most is the many times he’s wrapped his arm around her to pull her closer. Not just for pictures, but just because the fucker felt like it! And Y/N doesn’t seem to mind it at all. 

“They have been the talk of the town recently, so while they could just be adding fuel to the fire, they could also have been caught by the flame and ‘caught feelings’ as they say. Regardless these two are a view we’d like to see more often.“ The other reporter says and that’s the final straw.

In one swift motion I turn the TV off and throw the remote across the room. It hits the wall and falls to the ground in several pieces, broken by the force of the impact. Just like I am broken by the force of the impact of these news. I don’t know which is worse: the fact that I fell for her and almost let her know it; the fact that she’s just another member of the club I don’t want anywhere near my life; or the fact that I can’t believe it.

Yeah that’s right - one foolish part of me refuses to believe that’s she’d do such a thing. I think that’s the same part which is still in awe of her so you can bet I ignore that part the majority of the time.

She is just another one. Not the one. Having been hurt before doesn’t mean she won’t hurt me or anyone else she’s gonna be with. Hurt people hurt people.

And damn has she hurt me, probably without knowing a damn thing. How selfish can you be, Y/N? How selfish can you really get? And how much am I going to allow you to hurt me?

                                                             *  *  *

“Thank you so much, Andrew. I would’ve died on the spot of anxiety if I was on my own.“ I say to my best friend who is currently sitting next to me on a park bench, in a tux, eating a cheeseburger. I too am still in my gown and am also gorging on a cheeseburger of my own.

“Don’t mention it. Us anxious people need to stick together.“ He bumps his shoulder against mine, stealing a small genuine smile from me, “Plus I couldn’t not come with you. You know how much I like a good rumor.“

I scoff, “Of course you do, but then again there was no need to add to what the media has already made a whole-ass ship out of.” I roll my eyes and take another bite. My appetite hasn’t been in its best condition so I’m only eating this under Andrew’s orders. I have no idea how people can ship us romantically, he’s the definition of an older - and very bossy - brother to me. I wish I could tell each and every single one of those girls who hate me because I’ve ‘stolen their man’ that I’d most likely be their sister in law rather than man snatcher, seeing as how my relationship with Andrew is so sibling-like.

That’s because we’re too alike, no one gets that. People play the ‘opposites attract’ car more often than I consider rational. But  then again when they see a couple like Andrew and I - who are basically the same person in different bodies - they suddenly think we’re super compatible. Trust me, we’re not. And everyone who’s been on set with us will tell you the same.

“What can I say...“ he shrugs, smirking at me, “I like the fun. I bet Becca doesn’t though.“

I can’t help but huff. Andrew is the only one I’ve ever openly expressed my frustrations with Rebecca to. He was super helpful on the subject, seeing as how he can relate - many partners of his have tried to use him, some of which even succeeded. He’s more than qualified to school me on the topic but it turned more into sharing bad experiences. One of which was that instance back at Corpse’s apartment.

“And neither does Corpse I suppose.“ As though he’s read my mind, he pokes the hurt spot, pouring salt in the wound causing me to visibly cringe as though the pain was physical - because it was, I felt it in my chest and in my gut, a sharp stab of guilt and regret. 

Why did I let it come to that? Why did I let us get so close? How did I not think of the consequences?

“I don’t care if he does or doesn’t.“ My hand automatically reaches for the pocket of the jeans I’m not even wearing in search of a cigarette. Not that I’d be able to light one even if I had them on me - Andrew would smack it out of my hand before I could even take a single puff.

He has the audacity to laugh, “You’re such a bad liar, Y/N.”

That’s all he needs to say really - that’s enough to make me feel seen and understood. Though that’s not always a good thing. I often times wish he couldn’t read me so well. Better said: I wish I didn’t let myself be so readable, you know. I’m just glad he’s the one who sees me because if it were anyone else they’d use this vulnerability of mine against me. I’m well aware that it’s a weakness, a really inconvenient one, but damn it I can’t get rid of it. I feel like I’ll be less human if I lose it. Everyone’s allowed to be vulnerable, some just are lucky enough to choose who they’ll be vulnerable around. I’m lucky enough to to have a choice, not so lucky in the people I choose to trust. Guess that’s not a luck thing, it’s just my inability to decipher whether a person is worth all the pain and torture of coming clean to them or not. So far many people have burnt me but two stick out in particular - Becca and Corpse. Corpse especially, which is the odd thing considering he hasn’t even wronged me in any way. At least not yet.

“Your phone’s vibrating.“ Andrew says, pulling me out of my overflowing head when he hands me my phone which I handed to him because of my dress’ lack of pockets.

“Thanks.“ I mutter through a sigh as I take it from him, checking the notification I’ve gotten.

My stomach drops: it’s a message from Corpse.

“Hey I saw you are in LA but we have a stream tomorrow, will you still be participating?“

Before I can reply, he sends me another message.

“I know you’re probably very busy but we get the most viewership on the streams when you’re in them so....“

I’ve probably been staring at my phone screen for longer than I thought since Andrew felt the need to make sure I was still breathing: “Hey, you ok? You look terribly pale.” I can barely hear him let alone reply. I can’t hear my own thoughts to know what to reply to him. “Y/N, you’re scaring me.”

I’m scaring myself too, Andrew. I’m scared too. I’m scared of how broken my picker has become. I almost kissed this guy! I almost entrusted all my thoughts, hopes, wishes and goals to him! What the fuck was I thinking?! Well, at least I know what he was thinking about - viewership. Likes, subs, views, publicity. The more eyes on the stream the better for him and everyone else. I genuinely want to applaud him, no one has been so direct about using me before. I was in a relationship with Becca for almost a year before I accidentally found out what she had been doing the whole time. No one’s ever smacked me in the face with this much honesty. It’s bittersweet really.

I want to laugh, I want to cry, slap myself across the face, slap him...I want to do so much, but all I can do now is sit in silence and think of how I could be so stupid.

He’s just another one, how did I not see that? How do I never see it until it’s too late? Why is one part of me still screaming: ‘He didn’t mean it like that!’

AND WHY THE FUCK DO I WANT TO BELIEVE IT?

@maat-the-prescriptive  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @itsminniekat  @hacker-ghost  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat  @idontknowwhatthisisfam  @evi-ka  @classyandfabulous00  @redperson58  @lilysdaydreams @solowheein  @mythicalamphitrite  @axen-gers  @luckygirl144  @nj01  @buddyemily   @the-albino-lioness  @stardream14  @gdhdkfnn  @nomadicgypsyy  @preciousskye  @fluffysuicideunicornsworld  @o-kaelin  @manacharlotte  @awkward-youtube-trash  @lolalee24  @bonky-beerns  @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian  @strawbrinkofdeath  @teenloves  @tams0527  @browneyespinkhair  @starstruckllamapuppy  @daisychains012  @y0ulooked  @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life  @jula-pauline  @melodykitty  @just-that-bi-girl  @crazybutconfidentaf  @lowellshade @alphakees  @bellero  @weallneednamjesus  @starryhanji  @boiled-onionrings  @husherstan  @fockingwhore  @melaningoddessthings  @prettypastelpetals  @haleypearce  @godwhyamiawkward  @y-napotat  @daisychainyoonmin  @little-miss-rebel3  @free-wheelin-bi-sexual  @redmoon261 @darkacademic2  @wiseflamingoqueen  @into-the-end  @namikhai-i  @nastiablr  @thelittleplantlover  @mirktuan  @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny  @vintagegothlover  @easygoingtheatre  @itsrandombooklover  @miiaivi  @emmybaybee  @befourgolden  @jjk-is-my-shit  @eternalteaaars  @spacebadgerx  @princesslunalight  @acequinn14  @samm48  @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa  @fo-love  @marishimomura-blog  @therealglenncoco  @cinnamonbun332  @killtherandomness  @sanshinexxxsan  @fee-btheweeb  @press-lay  @cathleenpotgieter16  @jazzydoesstuff  @moonlxghtbay  @forestrain2000  @hyunjinhugs  @blood-of-fandoms  @lovellylies  @ukiyolixx  @simpforhpcharacters  @chrisdylan17  @parkerjisung  @pedernille  @theodonyous  @wineandionysus  @malfoystilinskii05  @morbid-x  @coryisagee  @jessewa26  @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365  @raeanneinwonderland  @indecisive-empanada  @gluttonypalace  @loriane2503  @btsiguess-kpop  @khaoticbunny  @lucidlycactus  @smiithys  @rottenroyalebooks  @kpopgirlbtssvt  @fangirl-tc27  @fr0z3n-1  @notmesimpingfortechno  @shotarosleftpinky  @kunoi-chan  @idk-whats-wrong-with-me  @yikeroonie  @goldenstarofthunderclan  @poetry-and-tea  @ama-do-writing-stuff  @wishbonewolf  @emeraldxhope  @t0xick1tty  @kusuinko  @speakyourselfloveyourself  @sophia902103  @lo-manburg  @classsykittykat  @dmgama  @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee  @btsiguess-kpop  @akaashi-baby  @gun-jong-simp  @geschichtenfee  @yerapotato-wp  @browneyedgirl365  @thysagclub  @sparklycloudnight  @helloatomicshadow  @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal  @lucy-bunny17  @aaliyahh0  @katluckybear  @boyleanti  @straybids  @franchesca-791  @cosmicstorm19  @averyisbackinthetrashcan  @aomi-nabi  @xlanawriter  @allensimpsforcorpse  @sunnyrae-cessh  @ladykxxx08  @meowiemari  @renupf  @booklover76  @sra-verissimo

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

Do you have an opinion on tvtropes?

You're gonna have to be more specific. The culture? The idea? Certain pages?

I like the idea of TV tropes. I love touring it. I love getting to add theories and collaborate with other fans and discuss how tropes are applied or twisted or deconstructed or mixed. It's a great site! It can be super fun!

That's about 85% of TvTropes. Brace yourself, because I have opinions on the other 15%

See, there seems be an ever growing community of people who see it as their mission to be the most pedantic, elitist, exclusive people possible, and are using their relationships with mods to get their way at the expense of everyone else. The RWBY tv tropes page is in the process of being taken over by a group of them, because a few people used their mod friend to monopolize more and more pages, to the point where in those pages only the person and their friends can actually post. If you post tropes they don't approve of, they delete it. If you by some miracle post tropes they do approve of, they'll edit it to their "personal standards", which basically means taking your work and adding word cruft until it looks clunky and unnatural.

They push for tropes to have multiple addendums added and if you don't meet every arbitrary qualifier it's not a trope. For one, I apparently can't call Adam an ephebophile because he only had a relationship with one teenage girl, and the brand new trope description they cooked up says it has to be multiple, because they felt like it. Romances with a significant age gap now have specific age ranges attached for no reason. YMMV pages (which by their definition are subjective because THAT'S WHAT YOUR MILEAGE MAY VARY MEANS YOU FUCKHEADS) are getting fucking standards where you aren't allowed to say something's scary if it doesn't have the right qualifiers and boy was it a trip to watch in real time as they tried to figure out a way to make an inherently subjective topic objective somehow. They consider the inherently malleable nature of tropes to be trope "abuse", which is quite the accusation from people who have zero authority other than nepotism and decided to run entire communities off the site.

One example: the Nightmare Fuel page for RWBY was closed indefinitely after volume 6 because they decided there were "too many incorrect entries" and that clearly we mere mortals couldn't be trusted name things that were (according to them) actually scary. It took someone mentioning that they actually had a nightmare about the rally massacre in "A Night Off" before they grudgingly, slowly admitted that maybe some things about volume 7 were scary, so we were permitted to petition for things to be added while the chosen ones decided if it was actually worthy or no before adding their own, official spin. (And just to be petty, if you take a look at the Chosen Ones' masterpiece of a Properly Edited and Officiated Page, you'll notice that it's rife with typos, because apparently said Chosen Ones are too important to properly punctuate. But hey, it's a good thing those filthy peasants aren't "abusing tv tropes" am I right?)

[mybg3notebook]

Gale Summarised Analysis

Disclaimer Game Version: All these analyses were written up to the game version v4.1.104.3536 (Early access). As long as new content is added, and as long as I have free time for that, I will try to keep updating this information. Written in May 2021.

The majority of sources used for this article are in the game itself (this includes my Gale-solo playthroughs as well as a combination of the videos by munmomuu and selphie1999), and the few dev’s notes provided by pjenn. Gale as origin is not taken into account since it’s not finished and has little to none Gale-related content. There will be little datamining content as well since pjenn said the game contained almost no gale-related notes (only in the Weave and in the Revelation scene).

Additional disclaimers about meta-knowledge and interpretations in (post)

The number between brackets [] represents the topic-block related to (this post), which gathers as much evidence as I could get.

We can infer about Gale by analysing what he approves and disapproves of. Sometimes, we can even lightly infer some information from his neutral reactions, but let’s be honest: this way of analysing a char is pretty poor since it leaves everything to speculation. Neutral reactions can only be analysed, in very rare instances, by contrasting the same situation in other contexts, and seeing what other options Gale approves or disapproves of. With these considerations in mind, we can proceed to describe this character.

Disclaimer: this is a meta with my personal interpretation of the character, sticking as much as possible to the facts and leaving little to “desires” or “projections” of what I want him to be. If I do so, I will state it explicitly in the text for the sake of analysis honesty. I want to be clear about what is canon (facts shown in bg3 EA), from what’s personal interpretation with little proof.

Understanding Gale (integrated text)

We are none of us monsters. We are merely hatcheries for monstrous things. So we fight them

---Gale 

Collecting most of the information provided in-game, we know he has a cat, a Library, and writes poetry sometimes. One of the first things that Gale will reveal is that he is a private person. He easily and clearly sets boundaries from the first moment, showing Tav where they stand. The second aspect he makes us aware of is his pragmatic thinking and his preference for diplomatic approaches. A third aspect that stands out on its own: he is a very verbose person, maybe as a result of his academia background in combination with his poetry hobby. He also has a bad posture when talking, but I’m not sure if this is intentional or a bug.

We can assure that Gale certainly is a man of the city [13], and may have a decent social status. It's impossible to say for sure if it's noble or rich or both, or it is just a natural consequence of being a wizard scholar: he is frustrated by the harshness of the camping life, he misses the civilisation of the city which offers well cooked meals, soft beds, and scented baths. Not by chance he is the only companion in the group who would approve of giving Oskar 200 gold to fight “the discomforts of the road” [13]. However, he adapts. Despite the lack of luxuries, he managed to survive in the wilderness.

Gale and his link with magic is unquestionable. Magic is life for Gale, metaphorically and literally speaking since it's magic what allows him to stay alive despite the "orb" in his chest. If we talk about Magic, we have to talk about Mystra and the Weave. The Weave is not only the embodiment of Mystra, it's an extension of Mystra herself. It extends across many planes of existence and is in almost all parts of Faerûn. By dragging power from it, Magic can be performed. 

Mystra, for lore reasons and conjectures that I will discuss in the post "Mystra and her Chosen ones", turned teenager/young adult Gale into one of her Chosen, making their relationship more intimate and granting Gale a deeper access to the Weave. This put Gale into the category of an archwizard. It's clear that Gale was and still is a devotee of Mystra, which could give us a hint of his alignment since she is a neutral good goddess and she expects for her Chosen to align around it.

Gale likes confidence, in others and in himself. He is confident in his looks (he has described himself as a “handsome devil” and answered during the romance/Revelation scene that he knew he was beautiful under the light as well as Tav). But beyond these two lines, qualifying him as a narcissist seems extreme. He is surely very confident about his knowledge, and we see he is not just mere words: his Mind Flayer knowledge is at the the same level of what githyankis know. If we compare how Astarion/Tav struggled with the book of Thay, and then we see how Gale manages it (sadly the scene is not complete yet in EA, and there is almost no datamining info of Gale), we can conclude once more that his knowledge and power of the mind are real (he is, so far, the main companion who allows us to explore the lore of the game in a deeper way during his conversations). We also know it's a bit more complicated to intrude into his mind using the tadpole because he has knowledge and mental tools to protect himself (check the post about the Tadpole inside Gale). He is certainly a very verbose and confident scholar, who knows his limits, and in occasions he seems to dabble into an ego-teasing play as an attempt of levity, displaying his “insufferable side”, as he has described himself (his self-awareness of these traits is remarkable, and it is the reason why I avoid qualifying him as arrogant. Arrogant chars are hardly self-aware of their own bad manners or insufferable traits). But we can see it's usually done as a joke or, with an evil Tav, as an aggressive reaction. For a deep analysis of this aspect, check the post about "Gale Hypotheses- Part 2", section: "Narcissism". 

Based on his approvals and disapprovals, we can see that Gale has a strong preference in avoiding fights, violence, and bloodshed [1]. He will always prefer diplomatic and persuasive approaches [2]. Reasoning is his best weapon, but if the individual we are dealing with can hardly be persuaded, he would approve of a deception or an intimidation as long blood is not spilt. Here is where we see his pragmatism in action, all the time. His primary goal at every moment is to avoid bloodshed. His philosophy could be summed up in the line “the means [as long as they don’t kill gratuitously] hardly matter if the end is worthy”. And for Gale, nothing is more worthy than life [3]. This doesn't cover only the life of innocents he cares about, it includes the life of the most dubious characters as well, such as Rugan or Crusher. Gratuitous death is meaningless for him. During the scene of Nettie we can have a glimpse of his philosophy towards life: he viscerally hates treating life as if it were nothing: 

Gale: How dare she snuff out life with as much thought as snuffing out a bloody candle? […] It's not right to feel the cold breath of death in your neck, then move on as if it was nothing but a soothing breeze. One respects life by fighting for it, and one respects death by fearing it.

Gale: One should never be afraid to live life to the fullest.

Probably the limited amount of life he has due to the "orb" increased his sense of respect for life and its celebration. I personally understand Gale as a character who embodies the perspectives of a seriously ill person, knowing that their life may be short, but they will try to make the best out of it. 

He doesn't only respect life per se, he also cares about its dignity. This can be seen in his explicit rejection to undead existences such as Connor (he explains that it would be merciful to put an end to his undead nightmare), or in his disapprovals of humiliation and torture [9]

 We could suspect that this emphasis in protecting any life comes from the fact that only people who are alive can (sometimes) be forgiven or/and change. This is not explicit, but since he is a character who talks about being better and wiser than his previous self, about acknowledging mistakes, about forgiveness, this interpretation seems reasonable. 

These concepts of kindness and compassion combined with “the mistakes of the youth” are repetitive in his interactions and approvals [5,12]. Of course, they echo in his soul since they are reflections and desires of his own experience. This pattern covers forgiving children in particular [5], and disapproving hard judgements [16], especially on matters whose story is not fully understood by Tav. This means he doesn't like quick judgements when he doesn't know the whole story first. This scenario can be easily seen during Karlach's quest, he reserves his judgment until knowing Karlach's side: There are always two sides to each story.

Gale: I have to say I don't know if agreeing to this hunt was such a wise idea. Who's to say who's the real villain in this tale of devils and masquerades? [...]When we track Karlach down, let's chat before we chop.

Similar concept appears during his Revelation scene, when he encourages and keeps asking Tav to listen to him first before judging. This is also the reason why in his Loss scene he would disapprove if Tav quickly assumes that his loss of Mystra was due to arrogance. Tav judged him without knowing the whole story. However, once Tav knows the whole story, Gale will accept any judgement from them without approval penalties during the Revelation scene.

He approves all actions that imply helping others in hard times and disapproves of them if they were done out of greed [4]. He is an animal lover [6,7]. Being kind to animals and treating them good will increase his approval, while animal cruelty will earn his disapproval. Same goes for humanoids: any display of gratuitous violence that could have been prevented with a trick or a diplomatic approach, any humiliation forced upon others, any torture or situation of slavery, is disapproved [8, 9, 11]. 

In particular, Gale seems to advocate the philosophy of “give others their own medicine”[18] or in other words: poetic justice. We can see this during the Myconid colony; he approves of helping the Myconid to avenge the young killed by the Duergar, adding the comment: “Wicked killers deserve wicked ends”. He is implying to give them a similar, wicked medicine to the Duergars. Another less deadly situation of this kind is shown during the foot situation with Crusher: Gale is the one suggesting “pungent poetic justice” and telling Tav that they should force Crusher to kiss their feet. 

The most iconic scene, however, is during Nettie's, if Tav lies during her interrogation. As a hot-headed reaction, Gale states that he would have poisoned Nettie if this situation would have happened to him. Although, after calming down, he approves of and confirms Tav's actions [if Tav managed to persuade Nettie to give them the antidote]

Gale: A taste of her own medicine is what she deserves! […] But you handled it, and you handled it well. 

 In this scene we also see a pattern: Gale is shown as a fallible human; his most visceral reaction during the first moment is anger and indignation, giving us a hint that he is not so rational when it comes to emotional states. An extremely obvious, human concept. 

The scene of Nettie trying to kill a potential menace (the victim of a MF) reverberated in his consciousness, projecting immediately a fact in his mind: if he ever dares to reveal his "orb" problem, and anyone knows what a danger he represents—no matter how stable it looks—people will want to remove the menace by killing him. 

This is the reason behind his words “It's just that, had it been me... had it been...” Gale knows that this simplistic and common thinking in removing what's dangerous would end up turning into a more destructive tragedy in his case than in any infected victim of the tadpoles. So this combination makes us see, for the first time, an emotional Gale. After some seconds, he cools down and returns to his more rational, diplomatic, and moderate self. What we can read here is that Gale would be very prone to rush decisions or to make mistakes under emotional circumstances. We will learn later that the other mistake he made under emotional stress ended up with the "orb" stuck in his chest. A third mistake was done during the party, once more under the emotional stress of a potential abandonment by Tav due to the true nature of the orb. 

Everything related to the “orb”—which is his most traumatic experience—naturally makes him more emotional and prone to mistakes. To see how truly traumatic the "orb" is in his life we can notice the following patterns during the meeting scene: he speaks about the tadpole in a relaxed, rational way, despite the traumatising experience. He first asks for an archwizard instead of for a cleric, because his priority is the orb. Gale's main fear is not the tadpole, but the orb. If we remember his words after the consumption of the artefacts, we realise he lives in a permanent state of anxiety and raw fear, and probably pain too, given his facial gesticulation when anything interacts with the "orb" (whether artefacts or Tav's hand). His banter with Shadowheart reinforces the concept that he always has a knot in the stomach. When he accepts the deal with Raphael, it seems to be related to the orb, not to the tadpole. The effect of the "orb" has ceased, but the tadpole is still in Gale's head since we still need to roll against a high DC and not only against a 1DC during this scene, so we can assume he still has the tadpole despite Raphael's deal. See the post about "The Tadpole" in Gale for more details.

Gale is a character that represents human experiences deeply related to growing up: mistakes done in the past, and the acceptance of not being forgiven despite the desire of wanting to. This can be easily seen during the conversation of the second tadpole dream, where Gale's mood is foul and we learn that his deepest desire is for Mystra to forgive him, but he also knows it's impossible for that to happen. He detects the lie in this dream because he has accepted that Mystra will never forgive him. Gale is the story of mistakes done during youth with grave consequences, of acknowledging them and trying to make them right, of surviving those mistakes, and depending on the interpretation, he is also the story of an ill dying man, with a gentle vision and deep care for life. 

The great majority of his approvals are based on actions that show kindness and compassion, both reiterative concepts that are so important in his character that they come from his lips when we see the goblin party: 

Gale: The shadow within is spreading like poison, corrupting kindness and compassion. [Only after a tough DC of 15]

In combination with: Gale: I don't know myself anymore. All this... It's not who I am. Around you, I'm not who I want to be. I should leave. 

These lines show how, in a sudden change to an evil path, Gale would start doubting his own morality, explaining that the cause of it is the "orb" itself, corrupting the most core aspects of his personality. This corruption may or may not be lore-related. It's not completely clear what Gale's "orb" truly is. For more details, check the post of the "Orb".

 His constant critical thinking comes from his advocacy to non-conventionality [15]: a true scholar will always explore all the options and hypotheses before reaching a conclusion. Therefore, Gale would approve of any non-conventional way to fix a problem [15] as long as it doesn't potentially cause harm or bloodshed [1,2,3,8,9]. Due to his own background, Gale will always advise to be very careful of the consequences of one’s actions. This can be easily seen when, after encountering the caged goblin Sazza, Gale would advocate to explore the possibility of reaching Gut Priestess to cure the tadpole. However, when Tav helps Sazza to escape, Gale will comment briefly against this action.

Gale: I know I said it's not inconceivable a goblin priestess could help us. And yet... was it really wise to set another goblin free so she can arrange introductions? […] consider the consequences. What if she leads her entire tribe to the grove? Tav: I don't care, I owe this grove no allegiance. Gale: No allegiance, no. Though we don't need to sign its death warrant

Once more we see that Gale is up to using any (unharming) means to get a goal, but not at any cost. He has a clear line he doesn't like to cross: life [3]. Avoiding putting other people's lives in danger is very important for him. We see this concept over and over in most scenes.

He doesn't likerushed decisions, and in that same train of thoughts, he will disapprove any use of unknown magic or tricks when nobody in the group can truly understand how they work [17], for example the tadpoles or Raphael's deal (he is against accepting it quickly, but he will approve of having a more cautious attitude and carefully thinking about it). 

Since the moment we meet him, we can infer he is obsessed with the artefacts. It's obviously understandable: he doesn't want to die, but also, he doesn't want to kill all those that will be caught in the eruption of the orb. For this reason he will insist on the loot in the Temple Ruins despite knowing that grave robbery is not correct. 

Gale: Bad form, isn't it? Grave robbing? […] Let's have a look at the loot. It isn't for your pockets only. 

He keeps pondering life over death: although he respects the dead, he will always value more the living creatures in the present. This is also what pushes Gale to suggest Tav to open Rugan's chest. Stealing from the evil Zhentarins is not something that will weigh on his consciousness too much. Besides, he knows it belongs to a wizard: meaning that the chance for it to contain a powerful artefact is really high. Similar suggestions will be said about the Idol of Silvanus, but talking with him in the camp will show us that he won't approve of taking it, only as a last resort. He keeps pondering the living over a sacred piece of stone, since he knows the druids won't take the stealing very peacefully. Once more we see Gale's respect and care for life, trying to minimise damage as much as the circumstances allow him.

Gale is also a survivalist. He doesn't want to die, he loves celebrating life in its more mundane and small details. He is an emotional character for a wizard, a bit strange since they are usually portrayed as more rational and cold, losing their lives among dusty books. However, Gale has shown in many scenes that he prefers to survive without killing, but if he has to, he will do it, dealing with the weight of it in his consciousness because killing unprovoked affects him (scene in the camp after killing the druids, or the goblin party scene). 

His moral in preventing gratuitous death sometimes will conflict with his own survival, especially if he is by an evil Tav's side. He couldn't accept bloodshed when other peaceful options were available and possible to reach. This is clearly shown during the goblin party, where Gale's consciousness suffers and feels the corruption of the "orb" killing the kindness and the compassion inside him. He accepts that wanting to live is a powerful drive, but he doesn't support this massacre, questioning if all that blood was necessary. A Tav killing the tieflings seems to lose the possibility of pursuing Gale romantically, at least in EA so far. For Gale, survival is important, but the means to do it (when they can cause death) matter too. Life is worth preserving.

 The usual archetype of survivalist tends to be an individualist one who would survive at any cost without remorse because that's the “law of the jungle”, the strongest must survive. However, Gale seems to embody a different concept of survivalist that it's hard to put in words: a sort of communal survivalist, trying to survive in coexistence with his community: he wants his survival to imprint the least harm possible (even though sometimes it would not be possible), trying to help those around him as long as his condition allows it; for example, despite wanting Gut's potential cure for the tadpole, he would disagree in helping Sazza escape because she will lead the goblins to the Grove, no matter the fact that doing this will grant them their introduction to the priestess. 

His list of approval shows that his sense of survival is always pondered with the consequences that it can cause on others (check the post with the "Extensive list of Gale's approvals"). The whole concept of the "orb" has this motivation as well: he wants to live and survive, but he also can't give up because his body would kill many, so he needs to do as much as his moral allows him to keep it in check. If he cannot do it any longer, he promises to minimise the disaster as much as possible by erupting in the deep Underdark or in a desolated corner of Faerûn (and considering his ridiculous list of approvals and disapprovals, we know he is honest in not wanting to kill gratuitously). Gale acknowledges his own mistakes, trying—to the best of his ability—to deal with them without catching others in them. Although all his speeches keep emphasising that he is a mere human, and plans may fail. 

At some point, if he wants to survive “not at any cost”, he will be forced to ask Tav for help during the scene of the stew (available only for medium approval or higher). As a gesture of honesty, Gale will set a boundary before making this request, acknowledging its unfairness but giving Tav the decision to proceed or not. He is not denying to explain the details later, but at the moment he can't speak the “why” of his condition no matter how curious Tav is. Tav will decide whether they can keep their curiosity on the matter. 

We will understand later that this impediment comes as a precaution as well as consequence of his personal trauma with Mystra and the "orb" (See post about "Gale: Manipulation, Lies, and Trust"). So, he is very clear about setting the conditions in which this conversation will happen from the beginning. The easiest way for Gale to avoid this whole situation would have been by simply lying, but he opted for an honest approach with clear out-loud reservations, knowing he was asking for more trust than he was allowed to, but the intention behind is more than important. There is a clear, huge contextual detail that we can't miss: this scene doesn't happen because of Gale's whims, he is forced to ask for help since his condition “is not a patient one” and will endanger everyone if not kept at bay. 

This detail where Gale explicitly asks for an exchange of trust is not present if Gale's approval is neutral or lower. In this case, Gale would not care about giving a context to his strange request: he doesn't trust Tav and he doesn't expect to be trusted either, he only wants the artefacts to keep his condition in check for his sake and the sake of others. We can understand this change of attitude depending on the approval as he doesn't want to give any extra explanation to someone he is not interested in building a relationship with. For more details, check the post about "Gale: Manipulation, Lies, and Trust".

I personally support the idea that nobody in canon Faerûn is free of racial prejudices since Forgotten Realms lore has been created based strongly on fantasy racism. I've read that WotC wants to move forward and improve this aspect in 5e, but so far what they allowed Larian to do with the Tieflings in BG3 seems to show the contrary. So, since apparently we are going to face fantasy racism anyways, I will try to analyse racial prejudices from all chars. When it comes to Gale, it's a bit far-stretched to point out unjustified racial biases. He has a vague comment about Rashemi that some people may consider a faerunian saying. Personally, I think that line is a bias forced into him to have a particular dynamic with Minsc (the Rashemi “silly” companion -we all can see where Larian seems to go with this). Gale clearly sees tieflings, gnomes, and even goblins as people, and has a cautious attitude towards some githyanki (at least that's what we can infer with Lae'zel when we find her in the cage), but given the githyanki lore it's pretty reasonable to see them as dangerous creature that could kill people on the spot. So far, he seems to have no racial preference either [10]. 

As it was said before, he prefers to avoid killing people, but that doesn't mean he won't do it if his life depends on it. He will prefer persuasive and defusing approaches, but if he needs to kill to defend innocents or his own life, he won't hesitate. So therefore, stories about characters making mistakes or having violent excess in an effort to protect themselves or what they hold dear will be understood by him but hardly approved [19]. He tends more to approve a call out of that excess than approving an excuse for it.

Gale has deep abandonment issues that can be easily seen when he defends Astarion from being handed over to Gandrel. We need to put this in context before going on: for Gale, Astarion represents a danger as a vampire who attacked one of them during their sleep. By the display of meta-knowledge, we know with certainty that their approvals and disapprovals are mostly opposite: What one approves, the other will disapprove and vice versa. Getting rid of Astarion should be something that Gale would approve, however, he doesn't. If we explore his comments we will realise that what Gale disapproves from this situation is Tav's abandonment. After Mystra's abandonment, he knows very well that “Loyalty is such a very rare commodity”, and the few situations in EA in which Tav can display abandonment, resound strongly in Gale. 

Gale is a scholar with a strong balanced rational side. But unlike the trope, he also embraces an emotional side that, so far the info we received in EA, it's the side that makes him prone to mistakes. 

As an amateur poet, Gale loves words. We can obviously notice this in his verbose attitude, but also in the way he carefully uses words. One of his characteristic words is “spectacle”. He has also shown a reiterative—although not always—uneasy use of the word “fun”. Using “fun” as a way to describe the night spent with Gale gives him a slight uneasiness. “That’s a word for it.” He disapproves of using the word “Fun” after the Mayrina/Connor situation, in which scene Gale alludes that “your new company may be a proof of how depraved and twisted you are to see that tragedy as “fun”. Personally I think this is a direct allusion to Astarion, who considers Mayrina's situation as “entertainment”, in the same way he considered as “fun” the show of Arabella's death (two of several instances where he used that word). Gale also doesn’t use the word sex during EA, instead he uses romantic ones such as love-making, intimacy, art of the night/body. In the most technical case: coitus (used only when he is talking about “goblinoid intimacy” in the expression “post-coital snack”). These details are showing not only his poet/romantic side, but also his interpretation of sex from his perspective: sex can only be possible through a connection. We know he doesn’t engage in casual sex with Lae’zel if he is not romanced, and his romance can only potentially start if Tav shares that deep connection with him through the Weave. 

Another detail related to words is that Gale has always used an infection/disease-related vocabulary to explain the “orb” stuck in his chest: infested, taint, shadow spreading 

[…] I failed to control [this chaotic magic]. Instead it infested me. […] This Netherese taint... this orb, for lack of a better word [..] […] the shadow within is spreading like poison, corrupting kindness and compassion. [...]

Gale apparently has a particular way to sense magic. I have no way to check this in-game, but it seems very strange how he immediately identifies magical artifacts without casting Detect Magic. There are some extra scenes as well where he says to taste or smell the magic in some objects. Even his encounter with Shadowheart, besides being considered a flirt, could be also interpreted as him detecting the magic that we saw later in her hand or maybe the dark magic that blocks her memories, since Gale pointed out about a curtain covering her soul: “if the eyes are the mirror to the soul, yours have dark curtains across the mirror” (a very ominous flirting if it’s only a flirt)

This makes me suspect that, if the "orb" is not giving him this skill, it may be a consequence of having been Chosen of Mystra (for more details read the post about "Mystra and her Chosen ones"). If this is the case, he may have hindered remains of theirs powers when it comes to detect magic at will.

Gale has a perception of magic with all the senses: he sniffs and tastes magic. During the mirror scene you have an option related to [Arcana] tag where he “Sniff the mirror, trying to understand the nature of its magic”. A wizard Tav will just “Inspect the mirror”. He also said that he could “taste” the magic in the necromancy book and in the runes of teleportation. 

What we know of his family is little: when he was a kid there was a housekeeper in his life (mentioned only once during the scene of the harpies) and his mother that seemed to have personally raised and cared for him (mentioned twice: in the ruin temple scene, and in his banter with Wyll) 

Tav: Why care about decorum in a long-abandoned tomb? Gale: Because my mother raised a gentleman. Then again, to be alive is to be curious. 

Wyll: Between the orb and the bug you've got more than your fair share of unwelcome passengers. Gale: What can I say. Mother always taught me to be a gracious host.

This post was written in May 2021. → For more Gale: Analysis Series Index

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The Cowboy - Part 10

Summary: Leaving the city for a rural area called Blayne seemed simple enough. Your task was to convince the people to agree with selling their land for a resort redevelopment. But once there, you soon realise that your city ways are entirely different to theirs. Winning their trust was going to take some effort, and when you start to fall for a local cowboy, you wonder if you really needed Blayne more than the city life after all.

Pairing: Jung Jaehyun x female reader

Genre: cowboy au / drama / romance / if you squint there’s some enemies to lovers up in here.

Warnings: Jung Jaehyun is a cowboy, need I say more? (a bit of angst and drama, and it sometimes might feel like you’re reading a Nicolas Sparks book, so I’m told lol) -- swearing, and I’ve never been to a rodeo in real life so I probably didn’t make a fully realistic scene, so don’t hate me, it’s fiction lol

Word count: 2281

This series will be updated every Thursday and Friday.

Preview | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11

It truly was another world. The country music was playing live from the stage nearby and the endless row of stalls selling assortments from horse gear to food overstimulated you. You had lost Avery in the crowd, the tall man crossing paths with a group of women from high school.

Jaehyun smirked. “He’s always been the popular one.”

“And you the troublemaker?” you offered and Jaehyun laughed, shaking his head.

“You’re the troublemaker. How do you propose I deal with worrying about you when I’m warming up Trickster soon? Maybe you should come with me.”

“I’ll be fine exploring whilst you do that. I’ve seen you ride so much now, I’m convinced your butt is a perfect shape to mold to any saddle seat.”

“Well, you should know, having seen my butt how many times now?”

“Jaehyun!” you gasped, slapping his upper arm and looking around yourselves. You relaxed, realising you saw no familiar faces nearby.

He seemed to read your mind. “Avery knows about us. He’s helping me out by keeping his mother clueless.”

“Would anyone else come from Blayne today?” you asked, and Jaehyun shook his head.

“Not really. It’s more so people from the town over that will. And whilst you’re a household name in Blayne, you’re not on familiar terms yet with others. Which means…”

“Which means?” you repeated, grinning when Jaehyun reached for your hand, interlocking your fingers. You looked down at the gesture. “I felt that tremble, Jaehyun.”

“What tremble?” he feigned innocence for only a moment. “Maybe I have some butterflies about today. I want this to go well.”

“It will. I know it will.”

“Because I have your support?” he teased, and you shook your head, trying not to roll your eyes.

“Because it’s a passion of yours. I can tell you want this opportunity.”

“It would be real nice. Joey told me if I qualify, he can help me with the training. I’ll need to find extra time to do it, maybe travel to his barn a few times a week for evening training but it’s doable.”

“You’re so cute, you know that?” you said, recycling one of Jaehyun’s lines. He picked up on it and laughed. “I like seeing you this hopeful.”

“I’m hopeful about us too.”

“You are?”

“If I win today, my Dad will be pretty chuffed. Maybe we could tell him about us.”

“No more acting like teenagers over this. We’re grown adults, Jaehyun. Regardless of if you win or not, let’s tell him. I’m planning on meeting with him on Thursday for my business proposition, so if that goes well, I doubt he’ll have any concerns about us.”

“This is my Dad we’re talking about. There’s a whole lot about him, about us, that you don’t know.”

“Are you hiding someone in the attic?!” you asked, gasping dramatically. Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “You’ve got an entirely different life kept behind closed doors? How about being the culprit to-”

“Here you two are,” Avery interrupted, eyeing your linked hands with high interest. “Is this why you wanted to come today, Y/N? Away from the prying Blayne eyes, you can finally go on a date with your beau?”

“A date?” you pondered before looking up at Jaehyun. He grinned. “We’ve been on a few of those already in Blayne.”

“And no one knows that you two are together? Woah, I’m impressed with how well you’ve covered them up.”

“Not for long,” Jaehyun announced and you smiled happily, nodding in agreement. “But I am mighty glad you’re back, Avery. Can you keep an eye on this one? I’m sure if left to her own devices, some of the sellers in the market here will have her pulling out money she doesn’t need to spend.”

“You’re insulting my judgment so easily!” you called after Jaehyun’s departing back.

Avery grinned. “Well, you chose him over me. I’ve been doubtful of your taste this whole time.”

“Avery McConnell?”

Spinning to see another woman approach you both, you grinned. “He’s all yours. I’m going to go watch from the stadium.”

An hour had passed by, and you were struggling with the concept of being at a rodeo. On one hand, it was thrilling to watch but also reckless. You knew there was a danger behind the sport, as there was with most sports. But you didn’t realise how easy it was to fall off at this calibre of competition.

You gasped as a young girl, no older than fifteen hit into a barrel and her horse was deep in the turn, losing its footing and the pair fell, the horse landing on top of her. With bated breath, you watched as she managed to get back to her feet, albeit with an evident hobble.

“Your first time?” an older woman asked knowingly, and you nodded. “Not from around here?”

“Originally from the city,” you admitted sheepishly, and the woman laughed.

“Called that by a mile.”

“Do I stand out that much?”

“You’re no country pumpkin like me, that’s for sure.”

“Ah.” You looked her over and smiled. “I think you’re lovely.”

“I wasn’t meaning how we look, love. You’re here to support your boyfriend, aren’t you?”

“How did you know?”

“And he’ll come out here soon, and you’ll be the type to cheer. Don’t. It’s really tacky and could throw him off. Do you even know what barrel racing is about?”

“Some. There’s three barrels, and you have to make it through the sequence with the fastest time and without touching them.”

“It’s a dangerous sport. The horses are trained athletes. It might be all over in fifteen to seventeen seconds, but during that time, it’s a race against their life. They need to move without any issue, carry the weight of their rider perfectly, and dig deep to get around and then gallop off again. And the riders are just as focused. It’s more than just a sequence. Everything counts.”

“Wow, and he had a chance to go pro for this?”

She laughed loudly then. “All cowboys will tell you that, sweetie. Who are you rooting for?”

“Jung Jaehyun,” you mentioned and her amused expression dropped, scooting closer to you. Leaning back from her sudden invasion of your space, you laughed weakly. “Is that a problem?”

“Oh, he’s good. He’s back on the circuit? He took time off ever since the fire. I didn’t think he’d be back to this level.”

“What fire?”

“Blayne’s fire,” she replied, her eyes now peeled to the catalogue, checking out Jaehyun’s details. She gasped. “Joey Newman’s horse?! He didn’t come to mess around today.”

You smiled politely at the woman, slipping into your thoughts. You knew this was a big thing for Jaehyun, but was he that big of a deal in this world? The new information explained the nerves, but he had downplayed this to you all day long. The barrel racing was one of the last sports on the schedule for this rodeo, and for hours beforehand, Jaehyun had assured you it was like a training event. Yet, this woman now had you believing otherwise.

“Can I ask something?” you enquired, coming out of your reverie and the blonde woman nodded. “What happens if he makes the top five today?”

“He’ll be scouted. Perhaps he already is getting calls. He held the fastest time for five years straight in this region. Everyone wanted a piece of him before his father pulled him out.”

“Pulled him out?” you breathed, blinking rapidly. “Why did he-?”

“How about you ask your cowboy that you’re having a fling with all about it, once he’s done racing the clock, if you have further questions.”

“It’s not a fling,” you corrected and she smiled sadly at you.

“Darl, I was dating Billy Burke. You might not know that name but everyone around here did. He went pro, won the Nationals and become a million dollars richer.”

“A million dollars?!”

She shrugged. “I was pregnant with his baby at the time he got offered to go pro. We were supposed to get married. But, you know, it was his dream to go pro. When given the choice between love and the race, he chose the latter. So what if he has money? He has all that fame now too. All I have is his kid who hasn’t met his Daddy once. Let me warn you, cowboys might charm you with their country hospitality but they all have bigger goals than the farms they run back home. Once Jaehyun is given the chance, he’ll forget that Blayne even exists.”

“I doubt that,” you defended. “I’m sorry to hear of your circumstances, and even if Jaehyun and I end, I can confirm Blayne means more to him than-”

“You really don’t know what he did to Blayne, do you?” Pity for you emerged in her eyes. “What do you know aside from his body then?”

Getting up, you stormed out from the bleachers you had been sitting upon, feeling foolish for being so worked up by a stranger. Before you could leave, however, Avery leapt up towards you and clapped his hands together. “He’s next up. Where are you going?”

“Oh, I uh, need fresh air.”

“Worried about him falling off? Don’t be. He’s the best here today, you’re about to see it. No one else can go from being a farmhand to a decent barrel racer without practising than Jaehyun. Come on, you can get air after his run.”

Nodding numbly, you allowed Avery to push you along, taking a seat again. Avery greeted a few of the people around you, and you watched the horse and rider before you now, finishing their run with ease. You looked to the sidelines, wondering where Jaehyun was.

“I thought you said he was next.”

“He is. He’ll be making his way in any second now.”

The grating voice of the commentator muted as soon as you saw the spotted horse come racing into the arena, your eyes peeled on the pair heading towards their first barrel. Clasping your hands together, you watched on intensely, praying Jaehyun and Trickster would make it around safely.

The woman had been right. It was a sport that relied on precision and speed. You had always considered a minute to be such a short period of time, but as the seconds went by, you found yourself changed. Every second counted now.

Jaehyun and Trickster rounded the final barrel and galloped to the exit, Avery’s screams and sudden shaking your arm jostled you out of the blur that had been your vision towards the end.

Fifteen seconds was all it took to give you clarity on your feelings.

“He made it! That lucky son of a bitch!” Avery rejoiced, and you stood up jarringly, walking down the aisle to the exit. Avery was still full of energy at your side. “He’ll be cooling Trickster down, Y/N. Come this way to the holding pen.”

You followed along in a slight daze, your heart thumping with the thoughts within your head. You disregarded all the information, the warnings that stranger had given you. When you saw Jaehyun walking the heavily breathing animal around and patting his neck, you almost broke into a run to reach the side of the pen faster.

Noticing your arrival, Jaehyun grinned and walked the horse over. “Well, what did you think?”

“I think I’m in love you,” you announced sincerely.

“After seeing only one run?!” Avery joked, but Jaehyun’s expression grew serious, not shifting away from yours even as he continued to walk the horse around.

Distractedly, Jaehyun called out for the groom of Joey’s ranch and dismounted, walking over to you and ducking under the metal bar that separated you from him. “You mean what you say?”

You nodded, choking on the sudden emotions that had come with your confession.

“You can’t take it back after I give you this chance, Y/N. You mean it?”

“I love you,” you repeated, and that was all it took for Jaehyun to crash his lips upon yours.

There was no thought to the professionals around you, nor Avery who had stepped aside to give you albeit a tiny amount of privacy. You didn’t care at all who watched you lock lips with Jaehyun right now.

Because it felt right.

You hadn’t expected to arrive in Blayne and find yourself looking in different directions for your life. It had always been well-planned out. You would build your career and work hard during these years, so when you had achieved all you set out for you could relax into love and create a family.

The country didn’t work like that. The values were so different from what you had experienced in your fast-paced life. And now that you had been given the opportunity to slow down a little, to take in the world outside of an office and not be attached to a screen day in and out, you were finding your desires were changing too.

You liked the idea of waking up in someone’s arms and falling asleep whispering sweet nothings to one another. During those fifteen seconds, you imagined your life without Jaehyun in it, and it made you want to do absolutely everything in your power to remain at his side.

You meant the love confession. You had never spoken of love to another person before. It was liberating, fulfilling. As Jaehyun burned his lips into yours, you knew he felt the same.

It hadn’t been long between you. But this summer romance was shaping your world more than you believed it had for his parents all those years ago.

You couldn’t imagine going back to the city now.

_________________

Part 11

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[mydarlinginej]

read my full review of not here to be liked by michelle quach here.

Emergency Contact meets Moxie in this cheeky and searing novel that unpacks just how complicated new love can get…when you fall for your enemy.

Eliza Quan is the perfect candidate for editor in chief of her school paper. That is, until ex-jock Len DiMartile decides on a whim to run against her. Suddenly her vast qualifications mean squat because inexperienced Len—who is tall, handsome, and male—just seems more like a leader.

When Eliza’s frustration spills out in a viral essay, she finds herself inspiring a feminist movement she never meant to start, caught between those who believe she’s a gender equality champion and others who think she’s simply crying misogyny.

Amid this growing tension, the school asks Eliza and Len to work side by side to demonstrate civility. But as they get to know one another, Eliza feels increasingly trapped by a horrifying realization—she just might be falling for the face of the patriarchy himself.

my review:

Despite being so hyped for this book, I was a little apprehensive, mostly because I’ve had a string of anticipated releases be disappointing. Luckily, though, there was no need because I loved this book! A powerful story, Not Here to Be Liked balances complex immigrant family dynamics, a budding romance, and what being a feminist means as a teenager.

Eliza Quan‘s guaranteed the editor-in-chief position for her senior year, not only because she’s the most qualified but also because she’s running unopposed. That is, until Len DiMartile, an ex-jock who’s only on the newspaper after lack of a better thing to do after being injured, decides to run too. And then promptly wins after giving a half-baked speech. Upset, Eliza writes an impassioned essay on the misogyny of the situation; she doesn’t intend to post it, but someone does it for her. An uproar goes up across the school, with Eliza suddenly the face of feminism. She struggles with the attention and the weight of this, especially as she realizes Len might not be so bad after all.

I suppose I should begin this review by talking about why I was a little apprehensive about this book at first. As much as I was so intrigued by the summary and everyone’s praise, I also dislike books that are entirely about feminism, mostly because they tend to lose sight of much more important things. Mainly, I worried about the “girlboss”-iness of it all. A strange lens to put on a book I hadn’t read, I know, but that definitely says something about the books I’ve been reading lately.

However, that’s not the case here: I found the feminism to be very balanced with the other aspects of the story, and I’m glad for it.

read my full review here.

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

*insert good title*

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/NhGoSLa

by A_Scepter11

Clark adjusted his glasses as he took his spot in the classroom. The first month of school had gone smoothly for him, no drama, no Lex, no people accidentally seeing an alien flying by…

------------------------------------------

Clark Kent was a totally normal alien teenage boy pretending to be human. After securing a scholarship, he moved to a school in Gotham, a weird place with too much lead. (Seriously, did anybody care about their health?) And Bruce Wayne, an enigma of a boy, for some reason has taken a liking to Clark.

Together, they got through the ups and downs of friendship… Actually, no. Clark tries to lead a perfectly normal life while Bruce is trying his best to make his life the most abnormal thing that happened to mankind.

Who’s the alien again?

Words: 1106, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: DCU, Batman - All Media Types, Superman - All Media Types

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Lois Lane

Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - High School, Slow Burn, Teenagers, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Communicating, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Author doesn't know how romance works, Author is not qualified to write this fic, Misunderstandings, Author doesn't know how American High Schools work

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/NhGoSLa