#does this make sense????????? i feel like it does

[imsofreakingtired]

i might just go jump into a river because like you can see her shoulders just sag after the "you don't do much of anything now do you magpie? bird without a wing is just a funny looking rat" line.

because that is literally her biggest insecurity. she is nothing if not useful and competent. she was the muscle of zaun, Silco's brawn for his brains. if she saw others as disposable for the cause of Zaun's independence, she also saw herself as disposable too. she knows without her arm, her value has diminished, and her innate sense of self worth is interchangeable with her capability.

so until smeech has the nerve to touch her you can see the effect his words have on her. Sevika's worst fear is feeling useless, and when smeech offers her a new arm it makes it that much more meaningful in characterizing Sevika. it becomes not only a question of loyalty or ideology but her own moral conflicts. he's offering her a chance to feel capable again, at the cost of going against her own loyalty. she's never had the friendliest relationship with Jinx, she could have caved and turned Jinx in as just another collateral loss for the greater cause of Zaun. but instead in the next scene we just see her trying to fix her arm herself. because she doesn't see Jinx as disposable - she's the figurehead of the revolution.

she's uncompromising and stubborn and if she finds herself trapped between two options she will fight tooth and nail to make a third option for herself. she never does anything for her own gain and idk if that's really noble or really sad.

but anyway all of that is shown in the brief way her shoulders just drop

Fortiche?? Fortiche, i just want to talk.

[quicksilversnails]

It's so fun how the Princess and the Dragon acknowledges and plays with game mechanics that are assumed to be non-diegetic, and uses them to add insight to the story/characters.

The title card is a really obvious example, being something that TLQ actually sees and can comment on, and something that the Princess hadn't ever seen. What most would assume is just a framing device for the player is a real element of the world/construct.

I think it emphasizes how the story that the Narrator constructed is only "meant" to be told to TLQ. After all, The Narrator only appears in TLQ's mind, providing elaborate descriptions and attempting to contextualize the events of the game as a heroic task to save the world. Meanwhile the Princess is all alone, with no title cards or exposition, no context for why any of this is happening to her. The story revolves around her, but it doesn't care about her beyond her designated role, as something to be slain and hated. Her perspective is irrelevant to the Narrator's plan, so she doesn't get the fancy presentation or necessary context: she doesn't deserve it.

There's also those long stretches of dialogue where the voices talk to each other in TLQ's mind without progressing the story. They're occasionally acknowledged by the Princess elsewhere (Prisoner, Nightmare) but P&tD makes it very explicit and confirms that time is actively passing during these conversations, with TLQ staring in silence for who knows how long.

(Personally I don't think all of the voice dialogue is necessarily in real time, if only because some Princesses wouldn't have had the patience for it. Like if you had really stood still for that long, the Beast would've definitely eaten you... she's not waiting for you to finish thinking lol)

This one I think is more for humour, but it also draws attention to how much of the inner conversation the Princess is missing in normal chapters, when the voices aren't actively speaking to her through TLQ's body. Where we're having vibrant debates or key information revealed by the Narrator, she just sees a silent, staring figure. Speaking of the Narrator, He's completely absent from the Princess' POV, either because He doesn't want to speak to her or is somehow unable to (He does say in Tower that she's not supposed to be able to interact with Him...) Again, the story was not made to be told to her, so she isn't given His context, and because the player is usually so immersed in TLQ's perspective, they probably wouldn't realize just how much she's missing until they see things from her perspective.

One other example: if you choose to [Say nothing] immediately after you excise yourself, the Princess reacts to it:

I just find this so hilarious tbh, and the fact that she repeats back those exact words implies that she literally senses the text written in brackets. If you do it once you're back in the basement, she says this:

I wonder if it's the same for the Narrator/voices... do they also “feel” your actions while you’re choosing them? Do they hear you say (Lie) before you lie? When Skeptic said "Wink" out loud did he actually choose a dialogue option with [Wink] in brackets?? Ok that last one's a joke but there's lots of potential here

I just think it's cool because the average player wouldn't think twice about any of these things, because they seem like simple stylistic/game design choices. In a game where all player input is through dialogue options, the square brackets are an immediately understandable way to convey action, as opposed to plain text. In a game structured around repeating loops, it makes sense to make those loops distinguishable for players by separating each loop with a title card, and the chapter naming convention works as a nod to the fairytale storybook aesthetics the game draws from.

But by placing you into the Princess's head and acknowledging those design choices as diegetic elements that change depending on your perspective, it forces you to reevaluate your experiences: the things you didn't think were really "part of the game" and the experiences you didn't realize weren't universal. It exposes your hidden privileges, the luxuries and structural supports you have compared to the Princess that you don't even notice because you've never experienced the alternative.

It might make you realize how the way you perceive and conceptualize the world might be very different from how others conceptualize it (Tony's recent ask about the multicoloured glass in HEA could also play into this in a fascinating way, with the mismatch in perception between TLQ and the Narrator's script). It's all just very cool for a game that's based on perception.

It also makes me wonder... what other elements of this game are diegetic that we just haven't paid attention to?

Well, I think that the captions are probably also diegetic. TLQ occasionally refers to the voices by their complete titles despite them not ever referring to each other by those titles, instead opting for descriptors like "jumpy one" or "the worst one" or "rage boy" or "chilly little freak" lol. For a direct comparison, Paranoid exclusively calls Smitten "the lovesick one" or some variant in HEA, but TLQ refers to him by his full name using quotation marks, as if he's quoting something he's read:

The voices don't seem aware that these titles exist, while TLQ does, despite them sharing a mind. Also, when the Princess shares a body/mind with you, she never uses their titles either. In the Spectre/Princess and the Dragon, she calls Hero "the nice one", Cold "the quiet one" or "cold little freak", and the Narrator "the bossy one" or "that murder-happy know-it-all". Spectre describes the voices as shards of broken glass on the floor, so she likely perceives them completely differently to how we/TLQ see them.

Even The Narrator isn't aware of His title. If you call Him that in the mirror conversation, He says "'The Narrator'. I suppose that's my job, isn't it?", reacting to the title as if it's His first time hearing about it. There's also this question from the fourth Shifty encounter:

It seems like the titles are presented specifically for The Long Quiet/decider, and that they somehow reflect how TLQ perceives the voices/Narrator, since TLQ takes credit for "calling him" that. If the captions were specifically shown to TLQ in the same way that the title cards are, it'd explain how he has this information without it ever being verbally told to him, and why the Princess doesn't know their titles even when she's sharing your body.

But besides the captions, I think it could be fun to interpret the game as if most, if not all of its game mechanics exist in-universe. The choice menu, the music, the cursors, the save/load icons, saving/loading in general, the title screen, the Clown Princess living in the walls (game files), you name it. Let’s peel away these game mechanics cell by cell! Let's see what meaning we can find together, let's see what we're made of!

[pedgito]

𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐄 | Joel Miller x reader

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summary | Joel doesn't have a Mrs. but he does have a sports car.

author's note | @chaotic-mystery made me listen to sports car and i said you know what? yeah. this one's especially feral, sorry in advance.

content warning | 18+ MDNI, no outbreak au, girthy age gap, car talk, sad hot grieving dads gone wild, daddy kink, more specifically daddy issues, mutual mas, no touch rules, cum eating, pure filth

word count — 5k

“Beautiful, isn’t she?”

Your tongue rolls over your teeth inside of your mouth as you stare with folded arms, phone clutched tightly in your hand as you wait eagerly for your driver to arrive and get you the hell out of here.

“Stunning,” You offer a forced smile, watching as your date lingered around the old car, pristine and well-cared for, an unattainable feat for such an immature man-child like himself.

It was the last time you were allowing your friends to set you up on a blind date, nearing the point of swearing off dating entirely, knowing that a man who couldn’t even cover half the check wasn’t driving around in a classic Pontiac, let alone affording the upkeep for it.

“Sure you don’t wanna change your mind?” He asks eagerly, the subtle admiration of the car waning as he comes into view, knowing the old beater a few spots down was surely his.

The bells above the convenience store next door jingle as people enter and exit, taking another impatient glance at your phone. You watch as the boy takes a seat against the hood and it makes you cringe internally, swallowing your words as an even deeper voice interjects from behind.

“I’ll give you about three seconds to get your ass of my hood,” The older man threatened, spinning the keys in his palm as he set the six pack of beer on the roof, the younger kid scrambled to his feet instantly, “—is he botherin’ you?”

“Unfortunately,” You mumble as you take another glance at your phone and curse under your breath, watching the unmoving dot on the screen.

“Get outta here, kid,” The mystery man barks, “looks like you already ruined her night and I don’t need some runt like you fuckin’ up my car.”

You both watch as he sulks to his car, just as you suspected, your lips pulling into a thin line to stifle the laugh that built in your chest, feeling lighter for the first time that night.

“Does that happen often?” You ask curiously, watching as he fiddled with his door before the lock popped and the door swung open, the six pack of beer carefully placed in the passenger seat as he rose back up to answer your question, hands curled around the edge of the roof.

“Ever since I fixed her up,” He pauses, recollecting, “probably a once a week ordeal. They’re easy to run off, fortunately. You waitin’ on something?”

“My ride,” You wobble your phone back and forth weakly and Joel squints, shaking his head as he winces at the guttural backfire of the engine in the car behind him, the final memory of your absolutely awful date as he disappears down the road.

“Kid had a car and couldn’t even bother to pick you up or take you home?” He asks curiously, strangely not unsettled by his openness to conversation given his gruff exterior, “Some nerve.”

“It was a blind date,” You shrug, “My friends they—”

“Those ain’t friends,” He interrupts politely, “if they set you up with a guy like that.”

“Well, maybe—” Your words linger, shifting from foot to foot as the conversation dies out and your feet begin to ache, the summer heat making you uncomfortable, the silk fabric of your dress sticking to your skin as you wipe at your damp cheek and push your hair behind your ear.

“Hop in,” He tells you, stooping into his car as he closes the door, his waiting gaze staring up at you through the window, “I can give you a ride.”

“I…don’t know,” You answer uneasily, “I don’t even know you.”

“I’m Joel,” He answers almost immediately, “I’m not a genius but I figure you had a shitty date, no sense in you paying for a ride home if I can offer one. Chivalry ain’t that dead, sweetheart.”

You offer him your name quietly, approaching the car with some hesitation. 

He seemed like an honest enough man, swooping in like a knight in shining armor.

You’ve given worse men a fairer chance—so, fuck it.

–

“My dad had a car like this,” You perk up after a few minutes, the glass bottles clinking against each other from where they sat by your feet, between your legs, “not a ‘67—was a ‘69.”

“You know your shit?” Joel asks curiously, his left hand settled over the top of the steering wheel while his right was settled against the gear shift, “He teach you about ‘em?”

Oddly, conversation with Joel was easy. A similar interest, neither of you with any room to judge one another. Equals.

“I pestered him alot,” You admit, “I was supposed to end up with it but he sold it before he died. God, what I wouldn’t give—”

“She is a beaut,” Joel admits, giving a soft tap to the dashboard, “and a labor of love.”

“She? What’s her name?” You ask knowingly, the slightest hint of a smirk on your face.

He spoke so fondly of the car, as if it breathed life into him. It wasn’t unfamiliar to you.

“Sarah,” He offers up more subdued, but a soft smile graces his face for a brief moment, “s’long story, doesn’t matter.”

“My dad named his Jameson,” You say suddenly in an attempt to add some levity, “funny, since my dad was an alcoholic…”

Okay, maybe not funny, but Joel gives you a pity chuckle anyways. 

Luckily, your nervous admittance is quickly looked over.

“So, where’m I takin’ you?”

You chew at your bottom lip and glance sheepishly at Joel.

“Um…UT?”

“Goddamn, that’s like—”

“An hour away, yeah,” You sigh, “I won’t be upset if you want to stop at the next gas station, I have the money for a ride, it isn’t that big of a—”

“I’m about five minutes up the road,” Joel begins, fingers flexing lazily ahead as they raise from the steering wheel, “I’ve got a spare room, I can take you up there in the morning.”

“You’re a total stranger, you know?”

“There’s a motel just a ways up,” Joel suggested with ease.

Though as you approach it looks bleak, the fluorescent lights blinking overhead and a glaring spot for much more nefarious activity with the perfectly placed strip club across the road, feeling the car pull to a slow stop.

“I…think I’ll take you up on that spare room,” You stutter out.

Joel nods, a hint of amusement in his eyes as he shifts gears and pulls back onto the road. 

The flickering neon lights of the seedy motel fade in the rearview mirror.

“That place ain't fit for anyone, let alone a young lady like yourself."

“I’m not young,” You retort, ‘I’m twenty-three.”

“And I’m as old as this car,” Joel retorts, watching your face scrunch up in thought as you did the mental math in your head before he puts you out of your misery, “I’m fifty-eight, sweetheart.”

Pushing sixty? Big deal.

You’ve had older professors flirting with you inappropriately on a weekly basis, at least Joel was being polite and kind and not at all as sleazy as most men, at least, not yet.

You stare at him without his knowledge, his eyes focused intently on the road. He’s rugged, facial hair thick and unevenly covering his face, plush lips parting as his tongue swiped along his bottom lip, a permanent scowl on his rather softened expression. 

He’s devastatingly attractive. 

And there’s something about him that comforts you, a remnant of protection despite the unconventional circumstance of finding yourself in a stranger’s care after a terrible date on the way to an unfamiliar place.

Eventually, the car slows, rumbling into a small cul de sac with four other houses surrounding his own, certainly picturesque and not what you would suspect from a man like him. He cuts the engine dead as he pulls into his driveway and wordlessly leans his body over the center console, a hand snaking between your spread legs as he reaches for the six-pack of beer.

“Home sweet home,” He jokes lightly, “C’mon.”

With trepidation and a sudden heat to your face as he peers up at you for a moment while his hand is settled between your thighs, you nod.

Please don’t be a fucking serial killer, you think. 

A silent prayer said to anyone that would listen.

-

He’s a perfect gentleman, fortunately. 

Joel gives you a short tour, displaying the spare room at the end of the hall, an attached bathroom and plenty of escape routes—he seems to sense the unease still as it lingers.

“You said twenty-three, right?” He double checks, “You want a beer? Or water? I got some soda, too.”

“Beer is fine,” You answer with a nod, turning on your heels to follow him back down the hall and toward the kitchen, watching as Joel flicked on the overhead light above the kitchen island and pulled two beers from the cardboard casing.

He pops the caps off with ease before he’s pushing the beer into your hand and taking a sip of his own, leading you toward the dining room as he pulls out a chair for you and him, a comfortable distance as his legs spread out when he sits, the glass resting against his denim covered knee.

“So your daddy, he taught you a lot about cars?”

“How to take care of ‘em,” You explain, “What’s good, what’s shit. I’ve got a soft spot for the classics, you know? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like them fast, too.”

“Smart girl,” Joel notes, but then he lingers for a moment and watches as you sip gingerly at your beer, “I’m curious—and you can tell me to fuck off if you want, but what happened back there? Other than that kid makin’ a complete ass of himself?”

The comment should not make your insides twist the way they do, a faint throb between your legs that you hide with a cough and another long sip, “He’s just…not great. And the gesture was there, he tried paying for the date, but then his card declined and, well…”

“Sounds like a real winner,” He mocks, taking a hefty sip before the liquid is gone, sliding the empty glass along the dinner table.

“He’s not my type, anyways,” You shrug, finishing off your own beer and mirroring his actions, watching as he silently grabbed the bottles and stood up, disposing of them in the nearby trash.

Joel makes an unintelligible noise as he shakes his head, “And what exactly would that be?”

You hum thoughtfully, “A V8 engine for starters, some real hefty horsepower, a nice spacy interior,”

“Damn, just my type,” Joel plays along, “I like that you know your shit—you savin’ up for one?”

A car, he means.

 Given that you were attempting to find a ride home, it seemed like a valid question.

“Trying, sure.” You shrug nonchalantly, “It’s more of a dream anymore, college isn’t exactly the cheapest.”

A beat passes as Joel slips back into his seat and you pull your bare feet up into the chair, curling your arms around your knees loosely before you speak again.

“Serious answer—I don’t date boys my age ever. I was only entertaining it because my friends wouldn’t shut up about it. They’re usually older; thirties, forties. You can judge me—I get it.”

“Ain’t nothing to judge,” Joel shrugs, “You like what you like.”

“And you?”

Joel laughs at that, looking away briefly as you smile, poking his thigh with your foot as he thinks for a moment, eyes dragging toward the floor.

“I’m too old for that shit—ain’t nothing for me.”

“I think you’d be surprised,” You tell him honestly, knowing that most of the girls would be ripping each other’s throats out for a moment with him, the perfect amount of mysterious and dark, a hint of southern gentleman in the way he carries himself, a total fucking smoke show.

You knew just how deadly you’d be vying for a chance with him.

And here he was, like an offering plopped right into your lap.

Besides, you were having a bad night, what else did you have to lose?

“That so?” Joel seemed to be testing the waters too, a playfulness in his eyes that was deeply subdued but there, simmering. He wasn’t going to try anything unless you initiated, lucky for him, you were more than eager by now.

“Oh, I know so,” You nod with confidence, “Nice car—you got that whole dark and mysterious thing going for you and you’re hot, s’not like I’m blind, Joel.”

“Is there somethin’ you’re gettin’ at, sweetheart?” Joel asks curiously.

You shrug, a mischievous grin crossing your face.

You’ve had plenty of one night stands; terrible dates with half-decent sex.

You spent two hours getting ready, another getting to dinner, and you’d be damned to waste such a good opportunity when it presented itself.

“I had a shit night and you’ve already managed to make it better,” You admit, “I’m just sayin’ as a thank you, we could—”

“I’m not askin’ for a thank you, sweetheart,” His voice is immediately softer, alluring.

His brow twitches as you lock eyes, like a moment of consideration crosses his mind, large palms splayed out against even larger thighs, the type that made you curious.

He had the body of a man well-worked; a mix of someone who’s aged with grace and maintained his lifestyle through work, broad shoulders that begged to be explored, stretching as he fidgeted in his chair.

“If I told you I wanted you to fuck me, would you?”

Joel speaks your name aloud and you smile sheepishly, though he knows it was an act, feeling a little braver with a few shots of liquid courage from earlier in the night and a beer to loosen your nerves further.

You were staring at the veins in his hands now, calloused fingers rubbing at a soft, flayed spot in his jeans, right above the knee, tanned skin hiding underneath. 

“It’s not a question of would I, honey. I can’t.”

So, he would.

“Can’t? Or won’t?”

“I’m gonna save you the regret—besides, I got a few rules for myself, and if not allowing myself to touch you when we just met is one of ‘em, I think that’s fair.”

“Do you think I’m pretty?” You goad, feet dropping slowly to the ground between his widened legs, “Do you want me to touch you? Is that against the rules?”

Joel knows there’s no benefit in lying.

“‘Course I think you’re pretty but you sure got a mouth,” Joel comments, fingers flexing against his thigh as he leans back in his chair, letting out a long breath through his nose as he peers over at you, “I’m willin’ to do a lot more than touch, sweetheart. But, not like this, not tonight.”

“I’m not drunk,” You defend, “C’mon, Joel. I got all dressed up tonight and I’m askin’,”

Half a second short of begging.

“Sweetheart,” He warns, “M’not gonna,”

“Then touch yourself,” You encourage, “let me watch.”

“Now, what makes you think—”

Your straps droop down your shoulders, one adjustment short of your breasts spilling out of your dress as your head nods toward his subtle adjustment between his legs, pulling slightly at the denim suffocating his growing erection.

He’s got a beautiful girl presenting herself to him, one more no away from dropping to her knees to wallow, lips parted as you breathed out softly, thighs separating so far that Joel catches the quickest glimpse of your thin panties, nearly see-through with how wet you were, your hands squeezing at the fabric near the end of your dress like a nervous tic.

Joel wasn’t blind either.

“You were going to do it after I went to sleep, weren’t you?

“You’re stubborn as hell, girl—”

“I bet it’s big,” You throw from left-field, a smirk growing on your face, “I love sucking cock, Joel. It’s my favorite thing—s’not a rule break, right? If I touch you and you keep your hands to yourself? Do you want me on my knees? Wanna see what I look like with your cock in my mouth?”

His jaw clenches, watching the muscle strain underneath his skin as he clears his throat.

“Don’t be shy—”

“I”m not shy.”

Then?

Your eyebrows raise in question, your dress pulling slowly up your thighs, legs widening with the movement before Joel finally relents, the deafening sound of his zipper pulling a soft giggle from your chest as you wiggle with excitement.

Joel's hand hesitates for a moment before he reaches into his pants, shoving them far enough down his thighs, his eyes locked on yours as he slowly pulls out his hardening cock, watching him swell in the loose grip of his palm. Your breath catches in your throat at the sight of it—thick and veiny, an easy seven inches, a heavy set of balls to match as his fingers roll along the tight skin and up, his fingers drifting featherlight over his cock.

“This what you wanted?” Joel asks, low and throaty, a strain to his tone.

You nod eagerly, bottom lip pulling between your teeth as your hands settle beside you, gripping the chair so hard it creaks, legs spread wide instinctually, making room for him despite his distance, your dress slipping far enough down your chest that your breasts were on display.

Soft peaks, nipples hardened in the cool air, your chest rising with slow breaths as you arch yourself forward slightly, his hand keeping a slow, teasing pace as his thumb drags over the thick head and against the slit.

Your eyes flicker between Joel’s face and his tight grip around his cock, watching as he strokes himself with slow intent, belt jingling with the movement as he pushes his shirt up with the other hand, his own eyes trading between different parts of your body.

He’d suckle at your skin if he could, trail his tongue from mouth to cunt, have you a shaking, sobbing mess if he allowed himself the luxury, but he was a man wallowing in his own self-made torture and the energy in the air was palpable, thick with tension.

“Closer,” He groans out lowly, nodding his head in a jerky motion as his free hand beckons you near, “Spread your legs, sweetheart—lemme see you.”

You give him far more than he asks, standing slowly before you’re hooking your fingers in the fabric at your hips and pulling down, letting the damp fabric drop to your feet before you’re leaning down to pick it up, tossing your panties into Joel’s lap before you return to your seat.

One foot propped against the chair, your dress bunches at your hips, giving him a perfect view of your glistening cunt as you spread your fingers through your folds, a teasing touch.

Blindly, Joel grabs at the fabric and wraps it around his cock, like a vice, he squeezes tight.

Joel's eyes darken, pupils dilating as he takes in the sight before him. His grip tightens around your panties, the damp fabric adding a new, chest-tightening sensation as he strokes himself harder. A low groan escapes his lips, his gaze fixed on your fingers as they tease through your slick folds.

“You too scared to fuck a college girl?” You tease him, “‘Is that what you’re worried about?”

“Smart ass mouth, girl,” He gripes, “S’like your daddy never taught you any manners.”

“Oh, ‘cause I’m sure you could’ve,” You reply flippantly, gasping as your finger catches along your fluttering hole, a groan rumbling deep in Joel’s chest as he jerks his cock.

“I ain’t your daddy,” He reminds you.

You shake your head nonchalantly, “No you’re not. Could–could be, though. “What do you want? For me to pout and call you daddy?”

“Careful,” he warns, his voice rough with desire, “That’s a dangerous game, sweetheart.”

You hum at the words, a faint flutter in your chest.

If you stopped to think about what was happening you would psych yourself out completely, so you lean back further, arching yourself forward as you slide two fingers inside yourself. "I don’t mind playing," you moan, eyes fluttering closed for a moment before locking back onto Joel’s.

Joel's breath catches in his throat, his hand faltering for a moment as he watches you sink your fingers deeper into your wet cunt, the soft squelch paired with your innocent sounds.

He scowls as he squeezes his shaft, “Christ, girl,” He grunts, “Tryin’ to kill me, aren’t you?”

You shake your head impishly, “Temptin’ you,” You admit, “Is it working?”

“You know damn well,” Joel says tensely, forcing the words through his teeth as his fingers slide up and squeeze at the head of his cock, precum slick against his fingers as he uses it to add to the friction, his eyes roaming hungrily over your body, “fuckin’ look at you, so goddamn eager.”

“That right, daddy?” You ask breathily, giggling with the word as Joel looks like he could explode, his other hand cupping his balls to keep him busy, knowing if he lingered with his thoughts for too long he’d fuck you into the chair without an ire of hesitation, his eyes close as his head leans back.

“Is that what you need? Someone carin’ for you?” He asks, “Is that why you’re actin’ out?”

The way his hand moves against his cock is mesmerizing, the flex of his wrist as he jerks his cock in a practiced manner, something he undoubtedly does weekly, squeezing his sack gently in his hand as his chest rumbles quietly.

“Eyes up, sweetheart,” He chastises, “I’m askin’ you a question, answer it.”

You nod weakly, a frown forming on your face as you whimper, the softest graze of your fingertip over your clit as your body spasms, gasping at the feeling.

“Words, ‘hon,” He encourages, his own voice wavering slightly.

“Y—yes,” You answer quickly.

Joel chuckles deeply, “S’good. Good girl, sweetheart. You wanna spread those legs for daddy then?” 

Obediently, they do, presenting your glistening cunt to him as you fingers slip out, wet with slick and Joel licks at his bottom lip, mouth watering at the sight.

“Fuckin’ filthy,” He murmurs endearingly, a slight smirk stretching across his face at the sight, “—won’t even touch you and you’re mess, been like that since you got in my car, huh?”

You nod weakly, sighing as your fingers circle lazily over your clit.

“Taste ‘em,” He encourages, “clean ‘em up.”

Your fingers, he means.

Like some magnetic pull, you find your fingers pressing against your tongue without thinking and the tangy sweetness melts against your tongue, his breath shuddering as you licked your fingers clean, cunt pulsing with need, silently pleading for Joel.

His eyes narrow, darkening with lust as his hand speeds up around his cock, obscene sounds matching his heady words, neck straining as he grunts, “That’s it, sweetheart. Listenin’ to your daddy—M’fuck—fuckin’ close.”

Through your bleary haze, you nod with the same sentiment, speaking softly, “Metoometoo—”

His movements are more fumbling, quick and furious jerks of his cock that still at the head as he squeezes, his face scrunching up in a mix of frustration and desperation, trying harder than he’s ever had to not shoot his load too soon.

“Yeah? Show me,” He encourages, goading as his unoccupied hand twists into his shirt and hastily pulls it up and over his head, “Spread your legs for me, baby.”

They spread impossibly wider, your hand reaching behind your head to grip onto the chair as your ass slips near the edge, circling your fingers over your clit without much precision, knowing that one more word from his mouth and you’d be drooling all over the seat.

“So fuckin’ desperate, look at you,” He demeans, “Poor little girl with daddy issues, huh?”

You moan shakily, avoidant of his obviously goading question, eyes fluttering closed as your orgasm crept in slow, mumbling out the words without even thinking, “Please—please can I—daddy, can I—”

“S’alright, we’ll fix that,” Joel comments softly, his voice a low growl, “Go on, sweetheart, come for me.”

The feeling is instant, his permission all you need to melt over the edge, legs shaking through the mind-numbing sensation your climax brings, chest tightening as you gasp, fingers working frantically over your clit as Joel’s name slips from your mouth.

Distantly, you hear him groan, his orgasm overtaking him at the sight of you writhing in your chair, spilling over his tight fist as thick, milky ropes of cum spread across his chest and down the underside of his cock, his eyes falling shut. 

As your breathing slows, your thighs pull together, shrinking impossibly small into the chair in a sudden overwhelming feeling of shame. Shame that you had shared an intimate moment like this with a man you barely knew all because you had a terrible night and shame over how easily he had made you come, like it was natural.

Despite the obvious, Joel doesn’t miss a beat.

A slow, satisfied smile spreads across his face and he beckons you forward. Finally.

“On your knees, sweetheart,” He instructs as your body moves without much protest, sliding to the floor as your dress pools at your hips, not amiss to the way Joel’s eyes follow the subtle bounce of your breasts as you move between his spread legs, his erection flagging but your tongue peeks out eagerly, licking at the head of his cock as your hands curls around his calves for support, “S’not—hey,” He hisses, “you were listenin’ so good until now.”

He’s salty and sweet, a taste so inviting that you needed more. It made your mouth water, tongue swiping against your bottom lip as your eyes fell on the opaque liquid covering his stomach.

Unfortunately, he still wouldn’t touch you.

He runs a hand through his hair while the other rests against the table, balled into a fist as you shake your head shyly, removing your hands from his legs.

“Sor—sorry,” You stutter, uncertainty evident in your voice.

Joel’s eyebrows raise, an unspoken bond quickly forming between you both.

“Try again.

“M’sorry, daddy—what can—,” You gulp audibly, fidgeting nervously with the silk fabric at your waist, “how can I make it up to you?”

Joel glances down at his stomach, still covered in cum as he breathes, watching the liquid drop down his skin and to his softening cock, still intimidatingly large even as it rests against his thigh, “Why don’t you clean me up? Can you do that?”

You nod eagerly, darting forward immediately as your tongue glided along his skin, into the small patch of hair above his groin and to his belly button, hearing Joel groan as the chair creaks with his shifting weight, struggling against his own forced restraint as you lick the cooled cum off his skin, eyes flicking up to look at him, dangerously innocent.

A facade, he knows. But, he’s in fucking trouble.

“That’s it,” Joel coos, “Clean me up good, baby.”

You giggle softly, dragging the tip of your tongue along the last bit of his cum before you drag up the center, barely reaching his face before you pull away, a soft huff of breath hitting you in the face as Joel shakes his head and chuckles, looking away from you briefly.

“Still not gonna touch me?” You tease him, quietly pulling your dress back up your body and over your shoulders, fingers adjusting the strap as he turns back to look at you.

“I’m tryin’ to be respectful here, sweetheart. And you’re makin’ it damn near impossible.”

Your brow furrows in a mix of confusion and amusement, “Respectful? You call that respectful, Joel? Oh—” You clear your throat and pull your bottom lip between your teeth, batting your lashes, “M’sorry, I mean, daddy.”

“Careful,” Joel warns, “You still have an hour in the car with me in the morning.”

You nod, slowly rising to your feet as you adjust your dress down your body, smoothing it out over your curves as your hands rest naturally behind your back, loosely as they curl together.

“Mmm, no,” You retort, a playful glint in your eyes, “I think you should be worried about me.”

“Is that right, sweetheart?” He mocks, hardly believing your faux confidence against him.

“Or, you could just let me drive?” You attempt playfully, a full belly chuckle erupting from Joel.

“I mean,” Joel shrugs, his voice trailing.

Breaking his rule for a moment, the hand ruffling through his hair trails toward your thigh, curling around the bare skin for a brief moment, sliding up until his fingers grazed against the curve of your ass and your bare pussy underneath, your panties resting near his fist on the table, a keepsake.

“Gotta reward my good girl, don’t I?”

[midnite-c6]

thangyu with piercings….

HOOHHHH YEHAHECBTIEOWOSND FKRIORNEBWHRUF Ok yes!!! thanos already has an ear piercing so. that man has IT already pierced I SWEAR. havent posted a thanos namgyu threesome in awhile, here. 💓

|| nam-gyu tongue piercing & thanos dick piercing is real <3 || warnings: 18+, sex, fwb w/ nam-gyu & thanos, threesome

ˆつ⁠｡⁠☆ best friends with nam-gyu and su-bong since forever, you know all about their lil' secrets, debts, hookups, ambitions, favourites and whatnot. but now you know for sure their favourite thing to do is to fuck their lil' bestie dumb!

nsfw below!!-> ⊂⁠(⁠•⁠‿⁠•⁠⊂⁠ ⁠)

"fucking hell, man. how long have we planned this?" su-bong sighed as he takes another hit off his vape. the smell of sweet vanila filling the air. you'd let out a soft groan from the warm smoke you felt in-between your thighs, nam-gyu, specially in-between them, blows a smoke cloud right onto your exposed cunt, "been wanting to fuck her since that one party." even if he was still quite far, every chuckle he does makes you shiver, the vibrations affecting you. nam-gyu shrugs, "seein' it now makes me want to do it all the time."

"d-do somethin' i feel so vulnerable in this position!" the two would laugh over you, but you were right. you were stripped naked, laying right infront of them while they smoke and stare right into you. you wouldn't be in this position if they hadn't practiced in conducting a strip poker where you would specifically lose!

su-bong would pat your head. "hmmmm, so eager to get fucked, huh? you want this more than us i bet." he was so annoying, but you were a good sport, always, whenever you lose, you'd do exactly what the punishment says. you could feel nam-gyu's breath hovering right about your cunt, its been a few minutes since they've been staring so yeah. you're eager for any sense of touch. he snickers, "your pussy clenched over nothing." he could see that?? you were more sensitive than you thought..

seems like nam-gyu was an angel, nudging the tip of his nose against your clit as he kisses the lips of your pussy, the sound you were about to make was muffled from su-bong's lips that tasted exactly like vanilla. "dude. c'mon, let me hear her." nam-gyu groans against you. su-bong rolls his eyes, "you get all the fun?" nam-gyu hummed, "finders keepers, plus, i want her to rate the sweet recommendation she gave me." the tip of his tongue taking a swift lick against your clit, the wet and cold metal ball contrasting from his warm tongue. "haah-! fuck!" oh. you forgot about that. why did you give him the approval of getting that piercing? you were even there with him when he got it! saying it'll pleasure the women he'll meet ten times more, he really took the advice, and it seems you've proved yourself right.

the flicks of his tongue gradually move faster, the hard metal piercing felt unfamiliar to your clit, you'd arch your back, not being able to keep still. "shitshitshit- slow, slow down!" boosting nam-gyu's ego to an all time high. though su-bong really seemed like he felt left out, "jeez, he's just lickin' your pussy, nothin' special sweetheart." he leans in to say, clearly nam-gyu heard, bring his two fingers to be shoved right inside your cunt. knuckles deep. why were they so competetive to eachother? you'd always scold su-bong for being such a sore loser to nam-gyu, but this was a different competition than any of the other games the three of you played. plus, you couldn't scold him now, too busy moaning nam-gyu's name out like a mantra.

"ugh, he doesn't deserve all that," su-bong, the man with no attention span, pushes nam-gyu away from your pussy, "you fucking jerk-" to immediately line his dick against your throbbing hole, that was slightly stretched from nam-gyu's fingers, "thanks for the prep, bro." but it still couldn't have prepared you into taking his dick. he was pierced down there?! "su-bong! gentle pleas-" he was and will never be described the word: "gentle". he pushes his dick all in one go, fully inside, his pelvis hitting yours. you'd let out a pained moan, it hurt so bad, and the pierced metal added more length to his already big dick. he didn't need allat. "that's it. daaamn. been dreaming of this pussy since college, shit." he groans out. starting to build a fast pace against your cunt. "mph- thought you were choosing not to talk about your sex life, now i can confirm you're still a virgin." didn't take any effort for him to stretch you out though.. "tight as fuck."

you weren't! your past boyfriends were just small-dicked. not your fault you're still tight! you couldn't say that tho, too busy moaning. :/

nam-gyu was annoyed, obviously, but he was used to su-bong's tactics, "just take it, yea?" he says, pulling out his dick right infront of your face as he jacks himself off, the tip touching your lips, but not pushing past it. to him, rubbing his pre-cum to mess up your pretty face was like art, a pretty painting.

shit, this is so embarassing, "fold your thighs, pleaaaseee.?" su-bong 'begs' like it wasn't an order. he particularly thrusts harder. "c'mon do it, it's not hard, woman." you do as he says, your hands hooking to the back of your knees so you were in a full on mating press. "ah.. good girl, you've always been a good friend." the position only helped him to be deeper and deeper. </3 the spongy spot inside you, getting absolutely fucked dumb, especially because of that stupid piercing on su-bong's dick, it's fucking you mindless. he slaps your thigh, "mmm, you're losin' consciousness, babe, don't want ya' sleeping from this performance."

now you're sure this is gonna replace game night, and maybe every other hangout, maybe every other night, ..no, actually, not other, maybe every night. i mean this new game seems fun, what kind of bestfriend are you if not to join them?

nam-gyu is a smoker, thanos is a vaper. ily guys sm i swear there r still sum good asks in my inbox that i will do, i promise 🙏🏻

[bus-noises]

Personal rant here feel free to ignore

This stuff kind of annoys me because the idea is stolen. I believe the idea first came from a piece of (absolutely beautiful) paleoart about the rings earth had in the Ordovician, where a squid has washed ashore and says about what the anglerfish says here. It’s an absolutely beautiful painting, and makes infinitely more sense with a cephalopod because they’re quite intelligent and most certainly have better eyes than an anglerfish does.

Later on someone made a sort of jokey rendition of the painting where the squid is replaced with a sacabambaspis, a really silly looking extinct fish. From there it’s been copy cats all the way down.

If you like this piece fucking support the artist it’s ripping off.

This comic makes me so stupid emotional. She might have never known.

[loycos]

my personal headcanon to what exactly is under cait's eye patch. I've seen a lot of people who think she basically has heterochromia with a neat lil scratch going perpendicular to her eye, even tho the spear clearly cut along the eyelid. also, a spear slashing through your eye is not gonna make it change the color of the iris. what probably happened was- the eyeball was damaged to the point of collapse, and its remains had to be removed. so what we're left with is

she's got no eyeball. i think the eye patch makes much more sense that way- for one, seeing an empty eye socket might be considered unpleasant, so she mostly keeps it covered. second, you can see how snug the eye patch is- it sits tightly on her eye socket, and i imagine that if there was an actual eye there, blind or not, it would get really irritated having a piece of fabric rubbing on it all day.

as for a prosthetic- i honestly don't think caitlyn cares about looking "normal". she probably won't get a functioning (fictional) hextech eye to fix her sight- i think she believes this scar to be a reminder for her past mistakes, so she never "loses sight" of what's important ever again. a prosthetic for aesthetic purposes feels a little ooc. caitlyn never cared about being pretty. i don't think she's shameful about her scar, nor does she wear it with pride. i think she's pragmatic and neutral about it, her biggest concern being "but can i still shoot" and the answer to that, i think, is a "yes". the rest is peanuts for her.

the upper eyelid itself is still in tact, and it healed kind of roughly, so the scar looks mingled (caitlyn could probably have surgery to fix it, but like i mentioned, she doesnt care for that stuff). i also think her tear duct is still working perfectly fine, so when she cries, she tears up on both sides.

[retrosabers]

𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬.

*relationship hcs written with fem!reader in mind*

contains: a little bit of everything. some relationship fluff, a bit of angst (mentions of death and past trauma), very flirty and filthy logan, 18+ CONTENT AT THE BOTTOM. MINORS DNI (body worship, praise kink, pain kink, dirty talk to the nines.)

word count: 1.5k

a/n: not me posting something for the first time in a) over a month and b) in 2025 😍😍

it’s been ROUGH in the brain and writing department for me, and this is the best i could come up with right now. i hope i can get back in my real groove soon, i miss writing real bad.

in the mean time, please enjoy my wolvie brain dump. feel free to share any of your own personal hcs in the comments or reblogs!!

GENERAL/PERSONALITY:

he’s secret tea drinker. always drinks coffee (no cream no sugar; nasty ass) in the morning but also drinks tea at night. though nothing can fully calm him down in the evening, the tea does relax him in some capacity, and logan takes whatever reprieve he can get. plus it was one of the first things you started doing together, so it’s become a part of his routine he can’t be without.

typically the first person up, and the last person in bed. you’d think logan wouldn’t be a morning person, but he’s surprisingly at ease in the early hours. as relaxed as someone like him could get, anyways.

likes to read a lot. he was in complete awe of the mansion’s library the first time he saw it. will often sneak in when no one’s around and read for an hour or two by the window if he’s got the time. when you discover he’s a secret bookworm, you start to leave a book on his desk that you think he’ll enjoy every once in a while. it’s a small gesture logan holds very near and dear to his heart.

can’t remember people’s birthdays or important dates to save his life BUT can recall something minor in a fleeting conversation from a long time ago. also remembers very random useless facts that have actually come in handy on more than one occasion.

if and when logan sleeps, he snores. so. fucking. LOUD, to the point where it can wake people up depending on how close quarters are. he denies it constantly.

likes to make sure his deodorant and cologne have the same general scent (i just know he smells like a sexy ass manly man URGH).

a lot of people hc him as a history professor but i have a hot take: gym teacher logan. not in the typical “let’s run laps and play dodgeball” way, but in the sense that he teaches the kids how to control and utilize their mutations to their advantage (with help from the rest of the xmen of course), and maybe even some light sparring to practice self defense. i personally just don’t see the history teacher thing working out because i fear he would subconsciously be reliving a LOT of trauma.

gets really anxious whenever someone is sick or injured. he’s been gravely reminded before that not everyone is indestructible like he is, and it scares him to see others get hurt in any capacity, because he’s terrified of losing them. the first time you get seriously wounded on a mission? logan damn near wears his boots down to the sole from pacing back and forth outside the medbay so much. he can’t eat, he can’t sleep, he can’t focus on anything other than you. time stops for him; and won’t resume until he’s certain you’re going to be okay.

legitimately purrs like a cat if you scratch his head just the right way. he will once again deny this until the end of time, but with less resistance and a much more flushed complexion.

“whatever,” he mumbles into your stomach, while guiding your nails back to his scalp.

hates ANY music made after the year 2000, but anything before that he’s pretty keen on. he’s got his preferences for sure (a little country, some rock, and maybe a bit of bluegrass), but isn’t above admitting that a pop tune is a little catchy from time to time.

IN A RELATIONSHIP:

you better not even THINK about ever opening a door for yourself ever again because if you do he’s taking personal offense to it.

he may be a slut in the sheets but he’s a near perfect gentlemen in the streets. i’m talking walking on the outside of the sidewalk at all times, always helping you out of the car even if you don’t need it, carrying your jacket or shoes after a night out, making sure you’re obscured from view if you need to adjust a revealing top; any chivalrous boyfriend thing you can think of, and he’s done it. with suaveness, might i add.

“here honey, gimme that, i got it.”

“hold on a second sweetheart, your strap’s all twisted.”

the definition of “you fell first but he fell harder.”

makes it a point to take you on a “real date” outside the mansion once or twice a month because he knows how much you enjoy getting dressed up for different occasions. whether that be dinner, dancing (yes, if you beg hard enough he’ll go dancing with you), and maybe even a trip to the museum or planetarium.

both the big and little spoon, it depends on the day, but he’s an insane cuddler either way. a human teddy bear for you and only you. this? he won’t deny, not for a second. and he’ll tell anyone who cares to tease him about it to fuck off.

always touching you in some capacity. a gentle caress on the back of your neck, or cold palms sliding underneath your sweater, logan has no qualms about being a bit handsy.

“if your girl looked like this, you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off her either.”

his favorite (and yours too secretly) is a hand in the back pocket of your jeans. there’s something equally sweet and sultry about it that makes your stomach flutter every time. a slightly possessive gesture, that when coupled with a cocky smirk and a shameless squeeze, never fails to drive you wild.

you thought he was a worry wart about your safety before you were dating? it amplifies by a million when you’re together, almost to the point of annoyance because he’s adamant on not letting you out of his sight. eventually after a few arguments and a scolding from charles, you remind him that you’re perfectly capable of handling things on your own, and yes, sometimes he does need to look out for you, just in case.

SMUT:

handsy logan = body worship logan. this man will make it his life mission to appreciate every single inch of your body. he doesn’t care if you’re tangled in between sheets for hours on end. you’re not leaving the bed until you know just how much he’s smitten with every part of you.

pain kink king who will cum significantly faster if you break skin with your nails raking down arms or back. gets an immediate hard on when you slap him in the middle of a dangerously intense argument, and implores you to do it again in a dark, lust driven tone.

to make up for the fact that you can’t mark your territory, with logan’s regenerative capabilities and all, he goes above and beyond to mark his. this man leaves hickies everywhere, and i mean everywhere. your hip bones, your navel, damn near the entirety of your sternum, your neck essentially a human canvas that he gladly paints in brilliant hues of lavender.

he may be a man of few words with most, but with you? logan can never shut the fuck up about how good you make him feel.

“look at you. doin’ so good for me honey.” “y’feel like fuckin’ heaven, you know that?” “my perfect girl. made just for me.”

cannot handle when you return the favor. immediately shoves his flushed face into whatever part of your body he can find and picks up the pace. praise is another surefire way to get logan to blow his load in record time. he thinks it’s a little embarrassing but you think it’s SO HOT.

loves a good tummy bulge OOP who said that

really enjoys sex in the shower or bath. there’s an additional layer of intimacy with it that makes logan particularly warm in the chest. will often suggest round two in the bathroom so he not only has the pleasure of ruining you again, but helping gently put you back together with a tenderness reserved only for you.

the ceo of teasing. loves to watch you get all flustered and squirmy so you best believe he’s teasing the fuck out of you any chance he gets. logan’s got wandering hands and a filthy mouth and that he uses to his advantage both in and out of the bedroom.

“what if i bent you over this desk, right here right now, hm? would you like that?”

“your skirt’s real pretty baby. think it would look a lot better on the floor of my room.”

“been thinkin’ about you all day. gonna let me fuck you real good later?”

aftercare is a learning curve. he’s not completely careless the first time you have sex, but he’s not as caring and attentive as he knows he probably should be. logan was used to quick one night stands, not getting intimate with someone he had romantic feelings for. once he realizes how in-deep he is with you, he takes the time to learn the ins and outs of true aftercare.

* for more smut headcanons, check out my logan nsfw alphabet here*

thanks for reading! <3

[sluttywonwoo]

my heater’s broken </3 so naturally:

nsfw // mdni

“when did they say they’d come to fix it?”

“monday.”

“ugh, we’ll be frozen solid by then.”

chris laughs quietly. “you’re so dramatic. we will be fine.”

“you might be fine,” you huff, “you generate enough body heat to make you sweat when it’s snowing.”

“c’mere then, let me share some of it with you.”

you shuffle over to his side of the bed and tuck yourself into him as little spoon. you’re still grumpy about the situation but at least you’re a little warmer.

“is that better?”

“yes,” you mumble. you tack on a ‘thank you’ at the end but it’s so quiet you’re not sure he hears.

it isn’t the first time you’re treating your boyfriend like a personal space heater and it won’t be the last, especially if he’s right about when your landlord was sending maintenance over.

you’re sure chris is secretly pumped about that, though. if he had his way, you’d fall asleep in his arms every night… but you toss and turn too much for it to be comfortable for you so he has to seize the rare opportunities when they’re presented to him.

one of his hands rests on your tummy, his fingers playing with the buttons of your pajama shirt.

“you know, you’d be warmer if you took your clothes off.”

“how does that make any sense?” you scoff.

“it’s true!” he insists. “they talk about it in twilight— i can warm you up faster if we’re skin to skin.”

you relent, and let him unbutton your shirt to take it off. chris sleeps naked so he’s several steps ahead of you already.

when he wraps his arms back around you, the difference is immediate. without any layers in between his chest pressed against your back, you’re practically engulfed in the heat that radiates from his body.

your muscles finally relax and your eyelids start to feel heavy but chris doesn’t seem so tired anymore.

“i can think of another way to get you even warmer,” he whispers.

you turn your head to try and peer at him through the dark. “is it what i think it is?”

“that depends, what do you think it is?”

you push yourself back into him instead of answering, confirming your suspicion when you feel him more than half hard against your ass.

“am i really that predictable?” he mutters, unable to keep from grinding into you now that you’re teasing him.

“your dick is.”

chris pulls you in tighter, using the hand he had been holding you with to push your panties to the side.

“whaddya say, baby? it’ll help…”

“fine,” you sigh.

he snorts. “that eager, huh?”

“i’m just tired,” you whine.

“i know, i promise i’ll make it worth your while.”

as if to prove his point, he starts rubbing your clit the way he knows you like it in slow, steady circles. he didn’t even have to feel around for it, he knew exactly where it was.

“w-what are you doing?”

“gotta get you wet enough first.”

he plays with you until he’s satisfied, until you’re dripping down his wrist. he licks your arousal from his hand, moaning around his own fingers, and then pushes himself inside of you from behind, still holding your body to his.

you moan as he bottoms out, the relief mixed with pleasure almost overwhelming.

“there,” he sighs happily. “now we can sleep.”

“you’re not… you’re not going to fuck me?”

“no, we’re just going to stay like this. this is to keep you warm, remember?”

“sex makes you warm too,” you insist.

“only for a little while. you’ll be cold again in no time, especially if we get sweaty.”

“but chris,” you whimper as you wiggle in his grasp, desperate for some friction.

he holds you in place with little to no effort which is both annoying and very hot. “if you’re still feeling needy in the morning we can revisit this, ok?”

you deflate, knowing there’s no way you’ll win this one.

“fine.”

“i love you, baby,” chris hums. you can hear the smirk in his voice, feel it when he kisses your cheek in finality.

“love you too,” you grumble.

at least you’re warm.

[thewidowsledger]

Good Luck, Babe

Chapter 4: A Piece Of You | 4.0k

© thewidowsledger - DO NOT REPUBLISH AND PLAGIARISE

Summary: The once secret, a forbidden love hidden from the world. Those stolen moments together had been thrilling, but ultimately, drove the person you truly love away from you. But when she left, she didn't just leave you; she also left you a part of herself that would constantly remind you of her for the rest of your life. This fragment of her essence became an indelible mark on your soul, shaping the course of your life in ways you never could have imagined.

You know what they say, when someone leaves, someone else will come.

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader

Tags | Warnings: +18 ANGST, cheating, smoking, smut but it was kind of cut off so it's just smu— pls laugh guys

Author's Note: This is about to get ANGSTIER. Nat's pain is valid but is her actions justifiable? Does r deserve all that? Pls pls pls I want to have y'all's thoughts, leave it in my inbox or in the comments or else I will not continue writing this jk i'm not joking. I removed some parts here that I think would be a better use on the next chapter that will be posted in 3 weeks (I know it's gonna be a long wait, but I've got to update the mob boss au and I've got to serve some angst fics for y'all)

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⧗

You're leaning over the counter, trying to read and sign the slip for Aliah's exams. You're terrible right now, you didn't realize how private schools can be so complicated that you have to sign a permission slip before they let your daughter take an exam. Suddenly, someone peers over your shoulder.

"You don't even know what you're signing, do you?"

This bitch.

You didn't look entirely at the woman but you saw her in your peripheral vision. You returned your focus on filling up whatever paper you are filling up.

But suddenly the woman leans in closer, her musky perfume overwhelming your senses. She effortlessly points out the correct line, her long fingers tapping the paper. "Is your child a transferee?" she asked and you nodded nervously.

"Check that one, then don't write anything down here." You gulped and nodded before shakingly dragging your hands to do whatever she just said.

When everything was signed, you double checked to make sure to get everything right this time. You push it towards the clerk, who scans it quickly. "All done, Mrs. Romanoff," she says with a smile.

"Romanoff." You heard the woman behind you whisper. You finally turn to face her, your heart racing as you meet her gaze.

The woman stands tall, her blonde hair cut short and stylish, framing her square-shaped face. She's dressed in a black leather jacket, paired with jeans and combat boots, giving her an edgy, intimidating look. She holds your gaze for a moment longer before her gaze flickers to the wedding ring still on your finger. Her expression shifts slightly, becoming more calculated. "So, you're the wife of one of the big sponsors of this school? Natasha Romanoff?" She asks the question almost casually, but there's an underlying intensity in her tone. "The transportation tycoon?"

The mention of her name and the title made you feel a pang of discomfort. The word wife and the title of being Mrs. Romanoff suddenly feels like ill-fitting suits. Your marriage, after all, had been little more than a convenient arrangement—for your daughter. So you are not sure whether to confirm or not, so you just let out a small awkward smile hoping that she won't budge further about her question. And the blonde seemed to read between the lines that theories started to formulate in her mind. She was about to formally introduce herself when she saw a kid running towards your direction.

"Mommy!" She watched you scoop up a little girl that clearly is yours, giggling as you attacked her face with kisses.

Behind her was another girl, it was the blonde's niece, catching up. "Auntie!" The little girl waves, her gap-toothed smile wide. "Up!"

Without missing a beat, the blonde reaches down and scoops up the kid, tossing her playfully into the air before catching her. The kid squeals with delight. "Hey, monkey face," she says, ruffling the girl's curly hair. Then her kid glances at Aliah who was in your arms.

She grins, her eyes bright. "Auntie, this is my new friend, Aliah!" she announces proudly. You turned around so you and your daughter could face them together, then Aliah looked at the woman who was carrying her friend, her little hands waving with a grin.

Now, it's your daughter's turn to introduce her newfound friend to you, "Mommy, this is Monica!"

"Hi, Monica."

The blonde watches as you speak to Monica. She's mesmerized by the way you interact with the children, so gentle and natural. Monica giggles at your greeting, "Hi!" she chirps back, climbing down to her aunties grasp.

Aliah wriggles out of your arms, wanting to join Monica on the floor. The two girls run off together, laughing and chattering excitedly. Now, you're left standing alone with the blonde again. She clears her throat nervously, a slight flush creeping up her neck, "I hope I didn't overwhelm you with my question a while back."

You shake your head with a warm smile, waving off her apology with a casual flick of your wrist. "O-oh, no worries." Your voice is sincere, as you pull the strawberry shortcake trolley bag of your daughter towards you.

Over the years, even when Aliah wasn't transferred at this school, you had always been present and active—you're always there, quietly observing, helping when needed, but never seeking the spotlight or engaging in small talk with other parents.

You glance around the hallway, taking in the other parents chatting and laughing in small groups. This is unfamiliar territory for you. Despite your active involvement in Aliah's school life, you've managed to maintain a certain level of privacy, keeping to yourself and avoiding unnecessary interactions with others as much as possible. Especially now, being in this marriage under the convenience of your daughter and being in this new school, it has only reinforced your desire for privacy. You don't want others knowing your personal business.

"So, how is…your daughter adjusting?" her question pulled you out of your trance.

"She's doing well and she seemed to be adjusting quickly." You respond briefly, keeping your answer vague but positive. You don't elaborate further, not wanting to delve deeper into Aliah's personal life or yours and invite more questions. She seems genuinely nice. She's not trying to pry in a malicious way—she's just being friendly. But your private nature won't allow you to relax and chat casually like the others.

"That's good."

After the painfully awkward silence, there was a sudden impact of the ball against the blonde's head that made your lips twitch despite your usual guarded expression. She stumbles slightly from the impact "Oh my..." she mutters, rubbing her head.

"S-sorry…" you bashfully stuttered as she saw you trying to hold your laughter back.

But what you didn't know is that she smiles victoriously, pleased to have finally seen a crack on you. Then, she traps the ball between her feet skillfully, making you raise an eyebrow. She looks your way, catching your surprised expression. She smirks slightly, then kicks the ball high up in the air, sending it back to the students with perfect aim and unexpected strength.

"Show off." You murmured to yourself.

She overhears your quiet comment, a mischievous grin spreading across her face. She adjusts the strap of her niece's bag, feigning ignorance but purposefully stepping closer to you. "Did you say something?" she asks teasingly, obviously enjoying your rare slip of emotion.

"N-no…" You giggled softly, you looked at her and she smiled.

"I should've introduced myself earlier but yeah, I'm Carol. Monica's aunt." She lends her hand over you.

"I-I'm Y/N…Aliah's mommy." Your small, hesitant hand disappears into her larger, calloused one.

She grins widely at your soft-spoken introduction. "Nice to meet you, Y/N." She smiled, gently releasing your hand. "So…I'll see you around?"

You didn't answer, your attention to her was long gone after you saw your daughter running towards your direction. You then fixed her trolley bag and prepared to leave.

Carol can only watch you and your daughter walk away, an unknowing smile playing on her lips. Then, all of a sudden a ball comes flying out of nowhere and hits her square in the back of the head again. She stumbles forward, letting out a loud "Ow!" and a string of curses under her breath.

"I'm not a fucking soccer goal net!"

"Auntie Carol, you said bad words!"

⧗

In the dining room, you and Aliah sit at the table, enjoying a quiet dinner together. Aliah chatters excitedly about her day, telling you all about the kids she played with and the games they played. You listen attentively, smiling at her enthusiasm, occasionally asking follow-up questions. You also made sure to ask her if someone or something is making her feel uncomfortable, it is a small routine you do with her to make sure she is comfortable and safe in school.

Aliah suddenly stops eating, her brow furrowing. She looks down at her plate, pushing her food around with her fork. You watch her carefully, knowing that look. She lifts her big, brown eyes to meet yours. "Where's Mama?"

As if on cue, her Aunt Yelena walked in the dining room. Aliah instantly perks up and slides out of her chair to run to her great-aunt's open arms.

"Yeye!"

"Hey, baby!" She scooped the small child onto her arms and put her back to her chair. "Finish your food, I have a surprise."

"Hi, Yelena. I cooked pasta, I'll get you some."

She couldn't decline as you were already walking to get her a plate, so she sat down beside your daughter kissing her forehead.

You placed the plate of pasta in front of her, "Thank you, Y/N." She smiles at you, her eyes meeting yours briefly before she focuses back on her food. "Mmm, this is really good," she says between bites.

All of a sudden, Aliah pipes up, her voice loud. "Mama!" She whines, looking around the room. Yelena sets her fork down, realizing the absence of her sister during dinner. "Yeah? Where's Natasha?" She asks, raising an eyebrow at you.

You immediately recognize the tone in Aliah's voice—that slightly higher pitch whine that signals a tantrum incoming. You kept your voice calm and soothing, "I'll get Natasha. Sounds like someone wants her. Rick told me she just got home an hour ago but he also said that she has an important meeting right now, but I'll check."

Walking out of the kitchen, you run your fingers through your dark hair, glancing sideways at the large picture frame hanging in the hallway. You catch your reflection—you lean in to see if your make up was still on.

As you near her office, you subtly adjust your blouse, smoothing out the wrinkles. Then, you push open the heavy door of Natasha's office carefully, you peeked inside, your eyes immediately drawn to her, seated in her high-back leather chair, facing away from the doorway. There was a head peeking through her desk. Clearly, a woman with wavy red hair was kneeling in front of her. You notice the absence of Natasha's wedding ring on her finger as she's tied the red-haired woman's hair with her tight grip. Natasha moans softly, tilting her head back, exposing her neck.

You were too shocked, too frozen, too numb to feel the tear that slid down your cheek.

Slowly and quietly, you pull the door closed, careful not to make a sound. Your heart pounds in your chest as you stand in the hallway, that single tear now joined by others streaming down your face. The shock and pain of the scene you just witnessed hit you like a physical blow. Your stomach churns and you feel the sudden urge to throw up. The room spins and you grab onto the wall to steady yourself, trying not to pass out from the overwhelming dizziness that washes over you. You inhale deeply through your nose, counting to four in your head, then exhale slowly through your mouth, counting to four again, like how your therapist taught you. You repeat this pattern, trying to calm your racing heart and clear your mind, fighting the panic attack that threatens to consume you.

"You're okay, you're okay, Y/N. You're fine. You're okay." You chanted over and over as you wiped the tears off your face.

You manage to pull yourself together and walk back to the dining room, putting on a brave face. Yelena looks at you suspiciously, your puffy eyes didn't go unnoticed by her.

"Baby, m-mama is in a very important meeting. Okay?" The blonde also noticed how your voice almost cracked as you spoke. Your daughter who is oblivious to the turmoil within you, behaves angelically as she finishes her food. The threat to tantrum was long gone. "Yelena? C-can you put Aliah to bed tonight? I've got…some things to do." You asked her hesitantly.

Yelena's eyes soften with worry, obviously noticing how uncharacteristically gentle and strained your voice is. Without a word about your eyes or voice, she simply responds, "Sure," flashing a small smile.

She also made sure to pay a visit on her sister's meeting tonight.

⧗

You retreat to your room, walking towards your large cabinets, you abruptly open your one of the drawers, grabbing the pack of marlboro red. Your fingers hover over them as you wrestle with temptation. Your hand trembles slightly, knowing the instant relief those chemicals could provide right now. The tightness in your chest, the dull ache from holding everything in…

It's an unhealthy habit that you've been using as a coping mechanism at the same time, it is an unhealthy habit you're trying to get yourself out with.

"Fuck," you whisper, unconsciously unrolling the pack's wrapper.

The cigarette trembles slightly between your fingers as you light it. The smoke curls up around your face, mirroring the storm brewing in your eyes. You sit on your bed, staring at nothing, the self-loathing growing heavier with each puff.

You took your wedding ring off your finger, you tried not to let the dam of tears break from your eyes as you examined the ring.

Everything's becoming clear to you now.

A dark voice in your head begins to whisper, planting seeds of self-doubt and guilt. You hurt her, destroyed her. Therefore, you deserve this pain, you deserve every pain she gives you. You're not good enough, never were. Your mind continues to whisper poisonous thoughts. You took a deep drag of the cigarette, the smoke burning your lungs like the guilt burning your soul. "This is karma," you told yourself. "You deserve every bit of her hate…"

A flicker of memory flashes before your eyes—the early days with Natasha, the sneaking together, the way she would sing for you in the middle of the night whenever your heart is heavy after a loss, whatever tournament you had joined. Your heart aches at the bittersweet nostalgia, the knowledge that you threw all that away because you were a fucking coward.

You stood and walked out onto the terrace, the night air enveloping you like a cold blanket. You took a long drag before exhaling slowly, watching the smoke dissipate on the icy breeze. The nicotine buzz barely touches the edges of your pain, but it's something. "She always hated these fucking things," you murmur, half-smile tinged with bitter irony.

You were about to get another cigarette when you saw your daughter, huddled in the doorway, her face streaked with tears, sniffling.

You froze on the spot and cursed yourself, you immediately stubbed out the cigarette on the ground and stepped on it, trying to make the smell and the smoke go away, but it's too late—she started wailing loudly, her tiny fists balling up as she cried. You've taken to hiding in the bathroom or stepping outside when you need a cigarette, not letting your daughter see or even inhale the smell of smoke because she hates it and you would never have your daughter breathe it. You genuinely think you're being stealthy. But it seems like every time you would light up a cigarette, your daughter would immediately know.

Seeing how it affects your little one's purity and innocence makes you feel guilty.

"You pwomise you stop smoke!" Aliah cried out loud. You carefully walked towards her, without warning, she ran towards your bed grabbing your pillow and heaved it towards you with all her might, her small arms flailing.

Getting down on your knees so you're at her eye level, you watch her tiny form trembling with emotion as she throws every pillow she can reach in your direction. "Shh, Ali...mommy's sorry..." Your voice trembled, but she continued. You took every hit of the pillow from your daughter.

You hated making Aliah cry, you hated hurting Natasha. You hated yourself causing them this.

Everything's too much, it's too much. You feel every pain physically now.

Suddenly, you crumbled to the floor, sobbing uncontrollably. "Mommy's…just hurt." Your voice breaks as tears pour down your face and fall on the pillows scattered in front of you. "I'm so sorry baby, please forgive mommy…"

As you break down in sobs, your daughter suddenly stops throwing pillows and stares at you with a frown.

"Hurt, mommy is hurt," you sobbed each word as you pointed to your heart, her little brow furrows even more. She's seen you do this before when you're sad or upset.

She walked towards you, throwing the pillows back on your bed. Then, she climbs onto your lap, wrapping her tiny arms around your neck. "Mommy hurt?" Through your sobs, you nod gently, holding her close. Her soft baby scent fills your nostrils, the smell of cigarettes long gone. And you realize how much you're hurting not just yourself, but this innocent soul who depends entirely on you. She placed her ear on your chest, a thing she grew up doing to ensure your heart is still beating whenever you tell her something hurt.

"Mommy's hurting...bad..."

And you deserve all of it.

⧗

"How many hours have you been sucking her?"

"Fucking hell, Yelena!" Natasha yelled, she pushed her office chair back and zipped her pants up.

"Out. Now." Yelena's voice brooks no argument, and the woman quickly scrambles to her feet, fleeing the room without another word. Natasha could only huff in embarrassment.

"That door is fucking closed for a reason."

"Well, it's unlocked, it seems like you wanted everyone to see the meeting you're doing here."

Natasha rolled her eyes as she moved to the nearby cabinet, pulling out a bottle of expensive red wine and a single glass. She pours herself a generous amount, her hand steady despite the tension in the room.

"Did you at least finish your meeting, sestra?" Yelena emphasizes the word 'finish' with heavy sarcasm. Natasha's jaw clenches visibly at Yelena's insinuation, her hands tightening around the wine glass. Without offering any to Yelena, she takes a long sip, still avoiding her sister's gaze.

"So this is your plan?" Yelena started again but her sister didn't bother to look. "Make her miserable?"

Now she got her sister's attention.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She murmured.

"I should've realized it." Yelena's laughter is sharp and devoid of any warmth, a bitter sound that fills the room.

"Can you…can you go?" Natasha irritatingly spat at Yelena without looking at her.

"Asking her to marry you, I thought you wanted a fresh start, sestra…"

"Watch your mouth." Natasha warned her sister, her pointed finger hanging in the air while the glass of wine was still in her hand.

But Yelena seemed unfazed by her sister's threat. "But I didn't realize…"

"Shut up!"

"That you just want to make her watch as you fuck some communal pussy with her wearing that wedding ring you put on her while you don't wear yours!"

"Fucking shut up!" Natasha hurls the wine glass across the room, missing Yelena by mere inches. The glass shatters against the wall, the sound echoing through the space. Yelena, however, remains eerily calm, not even flinching at the near miss.

She let out a deep sigh, shaking her head disappointingly. "Why are you doing this, Natasha? You've got so many options and money! You could've taken Aliah from her if that's the only thing you want! You can pay for better lawyers than her, you could've won custody!"

Natasha's jaw clenched as she tries to suppress her emotions once again. She takes a shuddering breath, attempting to regain her composure and stave off the spiral of anger and defensiveness threatening to consume her once again.

"But that's not what you really want don't you?" Her sister continues, Natasha finally meets her eye to eye. "Are you happy watching her go miserable? Kneel the ground you walk on just to earn that forgiveness from you?"

"She deserves it."

Yelena huffed about how unbelievably heartless her sister is right now. "I watched you fall apart over her. And now...now you're tearing her apart piece by piece." Yelena's voice breaks slightly. "I understand your pain, Natasha. I truly do, you're my sister. I held you through the darkest parts of it. But this...this is different. This is you actively choosing to hurt her, to break her."

"She deserves it." Natasha repeated coldly under her breath.

"Yeah, sure, Natasha. Whatever you say." Yelena was getting tired. "You're right, Y/N deserves all the pain you give her, sure. But does your daughter deserve that too? Because let's be real, you're not just hurting her, you're hurting your daughter too."

⧗

You tucked Aliah back to sleep. You made sure to change her clothes, making sure the fresh scent of soap and fabric softener replaces the lingering aroma of cigarette that clings to her skin. You smooth Aliah's hair, you wipe away the last of your tears. Her eyes flutter closed finally, her breath evening out into the rhythm of innocent sleep. You gently adjust her blankets, placing a soft kiss on her forehead before stepping back, your own eyes damp with residual emotion.

"I love you my Iyah."

You carefully extract yourself from Aliah's room, then go straight to your room. The first thing you did was take the hidden cigarettes from their usual hiding spots. Cracking open the window for fresh air, you aggressively grind each cigarette beneath your slippers, tossing the broken remnants into the trash.

You're not physically addicted, but cigarettes have become a crutch, a coping mechanism for the pain—when something hurts. The memory where you saw Natasha and a woman who was doing god knows what kneeling under her made your throat itch wanting some relief. But the memory of your daughter's face, her little sniffles seeing you take a long drag and inhale a smoke made your body physically flinch. That will be the last, you will not make your daughter cry again, you will not hurt her with a fucking nicotine stick. She deserves better than a damn smoker of a mom.

You straighten the rumpled bed sheets, placing the pillows Aliah had thrown at you back neatly against the headboard. Suddenly, there was a knock on your door, then, the doorknob aggressively rattled. You were about to get it when suddenly it creaked open and you saw Natasha in her disheveled state.

"N-Natasha…" your voice quivered, she is the last person you would expect to go to your room right now.

She towers over you, her tall frame blocking the light from your room. You step back instinctively, she breathes heavily in your face, the scent of alcohol, the scent of another woman in her skin are burning your nostrils. Her face is completely expressionless, almost scary in its neutrality. The lack of emotion makes her features somehow sharper, more intense.

You're frozen, shock rendering you unable to process the situation. Your mind is reeling, you are still trying to move on and forgive her from what you saw earlier—her and a red haired woman, their intimate pose burned into your retinas. And now, she's here, in your room, drunk and cold.

"Nat…what-what do you want?" She doesn't answer your question, her droopy eyes dropped down to your blouse. Your body trembled as she slowly, deliberately unbuttons each button.

You didn't resist, fear rooting you in place. Your mind is screaming at you to push her away, to run, but your body refuses to cooperate. Tears well up in your eyes as she slowly pushes your blouse off your shoulders, leaving you in just your lacy bra. Natasha leans in close, inhaling deeply at your neck as if trying to consume your scent. You smelled like marlboro red. Her lips brush your skin, sending involuntary shivers down your spine. She shoves you to your bed before crawling on top of you. Then she almost ripped your bra that is solely covering your upper body, exposing your breasts. She's not gentle, not sweet. She's cold, hungry—an animal. She sucks harshly on one nipple while pinching the other. You hissed, your body arching in pleasure.

It is twisted, you just saw her with another woman but now, you're letting her take you like this—no words, no tenderness. She's a force of nature, teeth grazing on your skin, fingers digging into your flesh. She's using you, taking what she needs, and you're letting her. At least it's you that she needs right now, right?

A tear rolls down your cheek, your hands reaching the back of her head as her mouth continues to attack your body.

It's better to have her like this, than none at all.

[youryanderedaddy]

tw: vampire "roommate", mostly light - hearted, teasing, murder threat (not reader)

"You're early today." He murmurs, taking a long drag off one of your cigarettes - the ones you carefully hid in the drawer precisely because you hoped he wouldn't find them - but alas.

"Didn't know you were keeping track, father." You scoff with unhidden annoyance, throwing your bag across the room - and it flops on the floor unceremoniously.

"Father," The vampire snickers sardonically, reaching to stroke the cross on his chess - you knows it's cheap and plastic, so it can't hurt him, not really. Maybe that's why he wears it - perhaps some part of his self - absorbed, immortal, twisted sense of humor finds it funny, hilarious even. "Very catholic - I like it. Say it again for me?" He teases, voice so silky it grazes your ears - something you're just not in the mood for today.

"Very funny." You roll your eyes, crossing your arms before you slowly find the courage to walk up to him. You look up - his dark locks are perfectly neat, flowing down gracefully like lilies, another painful reminder of his immorality. "I told you multiple times not to touch my cigs, okay?" You take a deep breath, grabbing the half - empty box in a flashy, demonstrative manner and waving it across his pretty, smug face. "Obviously I can't stop you from marging here whenever you want - and God, did I try," He chuckles at that, raising a single eyebrow - but you ignore him and continue. "But you can at least pretend not to be here while I'm away. And don't touch my stuff! Ugh!"

You sit down on your bed, feeling powerless, defeated from university, life, and the terrible day you had just had. It all feels like too much - but none of your frustrations get to Julian, who keeps observing you with curiosity.

"Why do you even smoke them? You're already dead." You keep ranting, throwing your hands in the air. "S'not like you can speed up the process." You mumble under your breath as you put the box on the buro beside you, which makes the man laugh whole - heartedly, sitting next to you. You swallow quietly, unnerved by the shortened distance - he's been showing at your flat for more than an year now, always unannounced - butting into your life, prying every little detail and crook of information, yet you still freeze up when you feel the cold radiating off his skin. It's unnatural - inhuman, and your heat recognizes what the other lacks. What he's not, and what he is, deep down - a predator.

"I like it. In all of your movies I see men and women smoking as they stare into the distance oh-so-mysteriously. I thought you humans liked that stuff." The man nudges towards you, smirking - and despite your best efforts, you feel completely and utterly mesmerized by the pure whiteness of his skin, the sheer contrast of soft red lips and sharp blue eyes. You can't deny it - every part of you wants to reach out and feel the ice under your fingers. He calls it "song of the void" - just like sirens, silver - born vampires like him have a certain magnetism, an all - encompassing charm meant to entice and tempt, and eventually trap the prey under control. So what does that make you?

"Oh, cheer up, princess. This was a joke. Why the long face?" Julian adds softly, catching your tired gaze. "Wait, don't tell me. I know what it is." He clicks his tongue, eyes full of mischief. "It's your little boyfriend, isn't it? What was his name again, Tiggy?"

"It's R-ricky!" You squel, growing more embarrassed by the second - this can't be happening. "And he's not my boyfriend!" You exhale, suddenly overtaken by even more fatigue. "He's just some asshole from the union." You whisper under your nose, but he, of course, picks up on it - heightened senses and all. The vampire then presses two cold fingers against your left cheek, bringing them to his lips - and you have to force yourself not to flinch, to remind yourself that you are technically friends - that he wouldn't hurt you.

Julian clicks his tongue in disapproval, eyes flickering with playfulness dancing on the edge between cruelty and kindness.

"Your cheeks are awfully warm for someone who doesn't care." His voice deepens as you try to collect yourself - to hide any sign of a fleeting feeling on your face, but it's all for naught. The man can read you like a book.

"I am jealous, you know..." He leans against the wall dramatically, a deep sigh on his lips - yet just for a split second, you notice his fangs sharpening. "I mean, you never get so flustered when you're talking to me." He gives you a cheeky half - smile, but his eyes remain serious and fixed onto your face. His hand rests on your thigh, drawing circles into your skin, and you can't help wondering if he can feel the blood pumping underneath - if some part of him, no matter how deep and hidden, wants to sink into the warm flesh. "I am starting to think you don't like me, princess."

You roll your eyes, swatting his hand away.

"I am really not in the mood for jokes, Jules. I had a shitty day, alright?" You exhale, gently stretching your limbs into the open air. "I know you're as familiar with empathy as fish is with bicycle," You start off, and the vampire gives you a funny look - you're not sure if it's judgemental, amused or both at the same time. " But I don't have enough patience to humor you today."

"Humor me? You wound me, sweetheart." The man puts both his hands over his heart dramatically, looking completely dejected. "If anyone is being humorous in this relationship, it's me." You raise an eyebrow in disagreement. "Oh, come on. I make you laugh." He puts a finger to his chin, mimicking as if deep in thought. "Like last Friday. I'm pretty sure you pissed yourself laughing when I tried that one recipe." He adds quickly, laughing gingerly at the memory, which makes you crack a smile in turn.

"I certainly wasn't laughing when I had to clean up the mess. I still don't know how you managed to confuse cinnamon with cumin." You frown, crossing your arms. "Hands down the worst steak I've ever had." You scrunch up your nose in disgust and he reaches to squeeze your cheek like a scolding mom. "So ungrateful. Tsk. Didn't know you were such a little snob." His voice is once again mischievous - and it's moments like these that remind you why you still let him in, despite the walking disaster he is. "You should be happy I even cook for you - without me here you'd be living off energy drinks and frozen pizza."

You lightly nudge him in the chest. "Shut up before I make you pay half the rent." You threaten, grabbing a nearby pillow and directing it at him as a weapon. He puts his hands up, holding back a snicker. "Don't bring that human bullshit into this." He says, raising to his elbows. "Oh, human bullshit? So how does your kind do it, Mr Dracula? Enlighten me." You ask, fluttering your eyelashes mockingly.

"Money is fake, obviously." Julian states profoundly, bringing his hands together. "Just some papers with no real value - besides the one you give it. What's stopping me from choosing the shiniest mansion on George street, killing everyone and turning it into my den?" He responds, undoubtedly serious - and you can't help the giggle that escapes you. "I don't know, the law?" You respond, shoulders moving up and down in joy. "What law? Legally I don't exist. Good luck finding me in those enormous data bases." His smug expression is back. "And that's only if their computers still work. Some are older than me." He finishes, totally self assured, and by that points your stomach hurts from laughing. This is... comforting.

"You're not angry anymore." Julian remarks, clear blue orbs carefully observing your every reaction - every single feature of your face to the smallest wrinkle. "I guess you forgot all about Richard. Heh." He turns to you. "Just my charm, I guess."

And just like that your mood sours again.

"Ugh, don't even mention it." You mumble, looking away - the man really doesn't know when to stop poking around. "What's the deal with you two?" His tone drops. "What, did he get you one of those shampoo boxes for Valentine's? The three in one - go?" He rambles, but you remain silent. "You know, I'd never do that. I actually have some self respect. I would have gotten you a real shampoo. The nice one that smells like peaches. I could steal you half a dozen - my movements don't trigger the alarms. Maybe even some conditioner." You can practically hear the jab in his words, and it's making you even more frustrated.

"Just shut up, okay?" You finally speak up, sending a sharp gaze his way, and his words die mid-sentence. "He cheated on me. Here, I said it. Are you happy now? Do you want all the gritty details?" You add, squinting at him - and his jaw locks in place.

"Fuck," Your friend mumbles softly, followed by your name. "I didn't know, princess. I am an idiot, I know, but he must be an absolute fool. Who would even hurt someone like y-" He takes a deep breath, stepping closer to you - and you step back. "Do you want me to slash his tires? I just stole a new blade that would be perfect for the job." He swears - and it's almost convincing, but you simply stare ahead, shaking your head.

"Don't be ridiculous. Wait, did you just say you stole-" You take a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves. "Look, it's alright. I, ugh, I will be fine. Sorry for screaming at you. It's just, it will take a while." You avoid his eyes - and the pity in them. "I, well, I liked him a lot, I guess."

The silence that takes over is deafening - but as you fight the shameful tears tightening your throat, Julian wraps his hands around you, silently. There is nothing much to be said, and he's cold as a statue - yet his hand down your back and his lips against your forehead bring you a great sense of warmth.

"Don't cry for him." He mutters with uncharacteristic tenderness before he lets his voice become sinister. "Please don't cry, because I might just go and bleed him dry, angel. Be strong for me, okay?" His hold gets tighter and the smell of metal and leather that seems to follow him wherever he goes, intensifies, leaving you light-headed. "I am here for you, always. I will never leave you." He strokes your hair, moving a loose strand out of your face. "I will never, ever leave you."

[rcmclachlan]

Reading the comments on this post and you know what? Tommy does have a podcast!

It's called Getting Rom-Commy with Tommy and he breaks down the history, plots, tropes, and cliches made famous by romantic comedies. He recorded the first episode—Tillie's Punctured Romance, the first feature film in the genre—in 2020 during the early days of the pandemic, and has since gained a small but loyal following who love his deep dives, quirky sense of humor, and the random breadcrumbs about his own life that he drops occasionally.

For three and a half years, he's posted an episode every other Thursday without fail, so it's the talk of r/romcommytommy when the promised episode about A New Leaf doesn't materialize. They worry about Tommy being sick or dead—or worse: growing bored with the subject matter—and flood his podcast inbox with well wishes and pleas to continue the series.

Finally, the episode goes up the following Thursday, and he prefaces it by apologizing for the delay. He had gotten tangled up in a work thing and had spent the previous week dealing with the fallout (i.e.: paperwork), but he's in high spirits because he isn't in federal prison and has reconnected with old friends. And made some new ones! Which has nothing to do with Walter Matthau's performance, which in Tommy's opinion is one of his best, and he jumps right into the movie and says no more about what kept him away.

After that, for months, the series takes on a different tone—more buoyant, almost bewilderingly cheerful—and it elevates what was already a great program to something that truly has a happy ending every time. More people start listening. The subreddit hits 10k members, and speculation about what's causing Tommy's audible joy runs rampant, with most agreeing it's because he has someone special in his life.

Then, the 103rd episode goes live. It's an unflinching look at the movie Blue Valentine, which is very much not a romantic comedy, and for the entire episode Tommy vacillates between sounding dead inside and on the verge of tears. "It's just another example of how even the most passionate relationship will erode over time," he murmurs. The episode ends without its usual jaunty outro.

It becomes clear over the next several weeks that something devastating has happened, because Tommy has ditched his beloved rom-coms for the most depressing movies ever made. The subject of the top trending post on the subreddit for a month is 'If I ever listen to the Closer episode again I will need the following: a gun.'

His listeners debate whether or not to jump ship, but the film analyses are still really good. Plus, it feels like abandoning a friend in their time of need.

I don't know if you will ever see this, Tommy, but I think I speak for everyone when I say: we love you, we're here for you, we're not going anywhere, but for the love of GOD please go to therapy, u/marshedmellowout comments on the post for the In The Mood For Love episode.

No one's quite sure if u/marshedmellowout got through to him, but it feels like a turning point when the subject of the next episode is Desert Hearts. Tommy spends almost half the episode runtime analyzing the film's hopeful ending, and even cracks a couple of jokes. While his voice doesn't have that incandescent happiness from before, it's much lighter.

The next few episodes continue that slow, upward trend, and the movies Tommy deconstructs go from having hopeful endings to happy ones. He's back to making terrible puns and laughing at his own jokes, and everyone on the subreddit breathes a collective sigh of relief. He's going to be okay.

None of his listeners are prepared for how he starts the 118th episode.

"You're all in for a treat today, because I'm joined by a very special guest. He's not a big fan of movies, usually, but he's got a mind made for analysis, so making him watch Groundhog Day was kind of a no-brainer. I've been dying to hear him pick this one apart. Evan, say hi."

The joy from all those months ago is clear and present in Tommy's voice, but it's tempered with something new: certainty.

"H-Hi, everyone," Evan says, bashful and a little giggly. "Sorry, I've never done something like this before."

"You literally had a walk-on role in the country's most watched TV show. 22 million people tuned in that night, and that's not including the streaming numbers."

"That was different! I had one line. Plus, I didn't care about making Brad look dumb."

"Brad didn't need your help with that," Tommy says, audibly besotted. "Evan, you can't possibly make me look dumb. They can't see me."

Groaning through laughter, Evan gasps, "Oh my god, I said you get five stupid jokes and you just wasted one. Better make the next four count."

"I'll do my best," Tommy says. "So, overall, what did you think of the movie?"

It's the most listened to episode of the entire podcast, and u/cadburybunnyeggs's post 'Evan needs to be a permanent host and here's why' makes the front page of Reddit.

(A year later, the Four Weddings and a Funeral episode, which goes live two days before Tommy and Evan get married, is nominated for a Webby Award. What happens afterwards in the subreddit breaks containment and winds up in the New York Times.)

[junkieito]

Nobody asked but I decided to give some context, the whole country is mad bc that badly spoken, zero researched movie about a serious topic that features only one Mexican person is being awarded while having music that could have been written by a middle schooler.

In the beginning they talk about France showcasing places that are obviously not France while a spin-off voice narrates in horrible French.

The first musical number is a cumbia-like song that says "welcome to la france" featuring "the cheese I eat smells better than I do but my perfume makes up for it" (French people are know in LATAM for not exactly prioritizing bathing) plus some random french words

My favorite part is "VIVAN LOS PASTELES" (Pastel = cake) So, France occupied Mexico twice, the first time it was done under the pretext that french businessmen and artisans had suffered various forms of economic loss, one of them a baker that reportedly had been taken advantage of by general Santa Anna (I'm unsure if he was the president at the moment), who consumed cakes and never paid for them, which is why it became know as The Cake's war.

So basically we have the Sacreblus who run a baguette company and the Ratatouiles who run a croissant company, they are both rejected by their families for being trans but are promised the family's enterprise if they win a race and honor the family's heritage.

The scene with the Ratatouiles features:

(The dad does not favor Aghtugo because he is trans and 'doesn't have a penis' so he says any of his brothers would be a good option as well and he starts shading on them + aghtugo is how the franch would often pronounce the name arthur in spanish)

- But, Hugo is not over his "artist" phase and is addicted to paint thinner.

- Aee don onlee in'aile thinnegh, the zhelou pein gueevs mee 'appinezz

- Mario Hugo? Good luck having a twangy french man

. (Speaks actual french)

- It's impossible to understand you!

Amd

- It's not that we don't love you, it's just that we're ashamed of being related to you (:

Next scene Johanne is meeting her friend Emily... in Paris lol. They have an exchange and they mock the fact she's privileged and comes from a wealthy family and has no real problems but winning the race. The "french waiter" comes and then this exchange happens-

- Is that it or would you like anything else?

- That's it.

-Yes that's it... or maybe I'd also like to or-

- You said that was it. (Takes menu away) You must learn to abide by your word! (Rudely)

- Hey, what a great customer service!

- I know! The best in all of France!

We are mentioned for the second time that Johanne was sent to Mexico and she says she now does not understand some french things like the lack of kindness, animal cruelty practices and hatred of muslims. Then a sequence ensues where she just says "have you ever thought what we do is wrong?" and her friend magically agrees drowning birds in cognac is a cruel practice

- I feel so dirty now! I even want to take a shower!

- I knew I wasn't just crazy!

- I just never thought what we did was wrong somehow, I always though those minimum wage skin colored people liked how we treated them!

We learn that Johanne was sent to Mexico because she has hallucinations of Marie Antoinette which she denies saying it is the real ghost of her. Then she appears saying racist stuff about Emily.

- Don't listen to her! She has the fashion sense of a guatemalan (derogative)

Then ladybug is presenting the race and the first one is won by Johanne (they celebrate by throwing rats at her ). There is a number imitating "Soy Emilia Pereeez una mujer mexicanaaa que merece respetoooo" in black and white about "The trash man", after that we see Aghturo and Johanne are trying to solve their differences and Aghtugo ends up convincing Johanne to let him win the second part of the race so it is even and nobody wins.

- Baguette may only be bread but croissants are France itself! It's in our veins, in our wine, in the air we breathe!

Afterwards Aghtugo says to Johanne:

A: You only say that because you've been outside of France for too long, you're now but a Chimichanga* lover!

J: (Visibly offended) ?Cinco de mayo!

A: How dare you! (Slaps her)

*mexican dish

Ok this is because cinco de mayo commemorates La batalla de Puebla which was a battle we won against the french during the Second French Intervention. Sppiler alert we lost the war and they put an Habsburg as Emperor backed by Napoleon III.|

So in the end the competition is even but the french overlords say it an't be even, there must me a baguette battle-to-death.

* What is that?

* A battle where they fight each other to death... with baguettes!

* (Fake surprise)

Another scene ensues where Aghtugo magically thinks some practices are bad after Johannes says so literally.

By this point Johanne convinces Aghtugo of not fighting to death but an evil ambassador appears and hurts Aghtugo and tells them they must fight to death, it is discovered he acted like that bc he was controlled by a rat and he is defeated somehow (didn't get that part). The Johanne is being interviewed (her description reads "bored millionaire" )

This final part features the dialogue:

"Being controlled by a rat! The worst nightmare of any french-man!"

And then she says that to end the interview her mexican friends told her to gift them something specal which turns out to be a cake and the final scene shows her about to throw it into the guy's face.

Obscure reference but the thinner guy very ad hoc smells a rat at some point which is a reference to an obscure urban tale in mexico called la rata con thinner, which i don't wanna explain you don't wanna look up

Ithe filming credits reads "directed by: someone with adhd'

Et la voilà, c'est la fin.

Merci de ne jamais faire un autre truc comme ça svp

wait a bunch of ppl ( in mexico i belive) got togheter and made a mini movie where everyone is poorly pretending to be french in retaliation for the dogshit emilia perez musical this is awesome tjhey all have little mustaches drawn on with sharpie and are spealing the worst french ever

[ariestrxsh]

dealer!chris x dealer!reader

💸 content warning: smut/angst (in later chapters; this one's mostly just suggestive), mentions of hard drugs and guns, enemies to lovers, slow burn

💸 summary: you and chris set aside your differences to join forces and close on a sweet deal with a local supplier.

there will be several parts to this story, and they will contain sex, drugs, violence, use of weapons, and a lot of things that could be triggering if you've ever been apart of the drug world or loved someone with an addiction. i don't mean to glorify drug use, selling, or anything like that, but i wanted this story to be realistic, so it does appear like a somewhat "glamorous" lifestyle to chris and the reader in the first few parts. i want to make it very clear that when you get involved in the drug world in real life, you usually end up in one of two places: the ground or prison.

WHEN SPARKS FLY

chapters: | intro | 1 |

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Chris Sturniolo," you sneered, crossing your arms after stepping out onto your porch into the cool air. You'd recognize him anywhere, even if it was just a silhouette of the back of his head at sundown on your doorstep, which was one of the last places you expected to see him.

He slowly turned to face you, a nearly-spent joint between his lips that were curled into a smug smirk. He looked you up and down, admiring the fancy dress and blazer you were wearing.

"What do you want?" You asked, raising an eyebrow as the smell of marijuana filled your senses. This better be good. "You know, ma, I halfway didn't expect you to answer after looking through the peephole," Chris motioned towards the shut door behind you.

You and Chris both knew that in your intertwined lines of business that looking through the peephole in the door was always a must. You never knew who'd be on the other side.

"Hot date tonight?" He wondered, gesturing towards your outfit with the cherry-end of his joint. "Something like that. You better make this quick," you said, cutting through his tendency to beat around the bush and talk in a series of metaphors rather than getting to the point.

"Mind if I come in? I wanna talk to you about something. Business-related," Chris mumbled, blowing out a final puff of smoke and squashing the roach between the ground and his sneaker. You hesitantly let him inside your home, but mostly because you didn't want any passersby to hear your conversation.

"Before you say anything," you said, stopping him before he could speak. You shut the barrier between your living room and the outside world, and you kneeled down in front of him.

"Hey, woah. What are you doing, ma? If you wanted to give me a blow job, you could just ask," he chuckled, smiling down at you. "Ha ha. You're hilarious," you dryly answered, rolling your eyes.

You began to pat him down, starting at his ankles. You lifted his pantleg and unholstered his pistol, placing it on the coffee table next to you. "Come on, ma. You don't trust me?" He pouted at you. "Oh, not one bit," you responded, glancing up at him as you ran your palms across his lower stomach.

You pulled up his shirt a bit to reveal a glock tucked into the front of his jeans. You confiscated it and set it next to his first gun. Your hands moved to his pockets, pulling out his phone and a wad of cash and placing them all on your wooden table with his other belongings.

Chris rolled his eyes and smirked at you as you accidentally brushed against the bulge in his jeans. "Sorry," you mumbled, clearing your throat and standing back up.

You started to feel under his shirt, running your hands and across his chest. "Come on, ma. You got all my guns. What else are you looking for?" He chuckled, looking into your eyes for a few seconds too long. He couldn't deny that he was getting a little turned on by the way your fingers gently glided across his warm skin.

"A wire. I'm not an idiot, Sturniolo. Why the fuck else would you wanna talk?" You snarked back, returning his lingering gaze. There was a thick sexual tension in the air for just a moment.

"Whatever, ma. You really think I'm a rat?" Chris asked, sounding a bit offended and giving you a hurt expression. "Can't be too careful. You know that," you said, running your hands down his arms, trying to ignore how gorgeous his blue eyes were and how the veins on his forearms felt.

"Alright. Now that I know you're not here to bust me or rob me. What do you want, Chris?" You asked him, sounding annoyed. "You ever think about you and me?" Chris said in a low, raspy voice. "What? You come over to ask me on a date?" You laughed.

"That's not what I meant. You ever think about you and me working together?" Chris asked, clarifying his original question. "You know, it would have been less insane for you to ask me on a date," you chuckled in amusement, heading back over towards the door to walk him out.

"C'mon, ma. We could help each other out," Chris gently grabbed your arm to keep you from walking away. "I know I could help you out. How could you help me out?" You skeptically wondered, narrowing your gaze at Chris.

"I could offer you protection. A lady shouldn't be going on runs alone in this business without a man," Chris replied. "I don't need a man. I can hold my own," you shook your head fervently, crossing your arms and tightening your jaw. You were somewhat offended by his comment.

"I know you don't need a man, ma. Feminism and all that shit. But wouldn't it make you feel safer? Just to have someone to accompany you on your runs? Someone to help take the edge off?" Chris asked, giving you a smug look.

You knew he was right. Drug dealing was a man's world, and there had been many occasions where it would have been safer to have someone like Chris with you. You unclenched your jaw and relaxed your shoulders.

"What's in it for you?" You asked, smirking at him. You mulled over his offer, assuming you already knew the answer. "You know, ma. I'm trying to make more money. Work my way up," Chris smiled at you.

"I don't mean to be condescending, but Chris, you're just a low-level weed dealer. Do you have what it takes to sell the harder shit?" You cocked your head to the side, giving him an inquisitive look, your eyes dropping to his full lips. "You act like I don't know what I'm doing," Chris responded, giving you another hurt expression.

"Chris. Think about it like this. You're like a lawyer, and I'm like a surgeon," you replied, giving him a methaphor he'd understand. "Both valuable skill sets, but if I walk into your courtroom, my scalpel isn't gonna do shit, and if you walk into my ER, your law knowledge isn't going to help you perform an operation."

"Ma, let me prove to you that I have what it takes," Chris responded, confidence creeping into the corner of his lip in a sly smile as he took a step closer to you. You peered down at your watch.

Your connect hated it when you were running late, but even more than that, he hated when you brought unexpected company with you.

"I'm about to go meet my guy right now and make a deal," you hesitantly told him. "So, that's what you're all dressed up for? You got a crush on your connect, ma?" He asked as he motioned towards your dress, giving you a condescending grin and nudging you in the arm.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. "No, Chris. We're meeting somewhere nice. The goal is to not look out of place. Look, I think I have a blazer and some slacks that might fit you in my room. Let's get you changed, because you look like a fucking drug dealer," you chuckled.

"I'll call my guy and let him know a colleague is coming with me," you said, making your way for the staircase "Colleague? I like the sound of that," Chris nodded in approval, following behind you.

"Not yet, Chris. That's just what I'm gonna tell him to avoid having to explain the intricacies. Just keep your mouth shut and don't look them in the eyes for too long," you rolled your eyes at Chris, hastily heading towards your dimly lit bedroom. You opened your closet door and reached towards the back of the rack, pulling out a black suit.

"Here, try this on," you told Chris, handing it to him. He hung the suit over the back of your chair, pulled off his hoodie, and then took his shirt off. Your eyes danced over his shoulders and his chest in the soft lighting, and you subtly bit your lip as you studied his build.

You and Chris may not have exactly been friends. In fact, you'd had a history with him, and the two of you were more like enemies, but you couldn't deny how hot he was. "Mind giving me some privacy, ma?" He chuckled, starting to undo his belt.

"My bad," you said, shifting your gaze away from him and heading out of your room, closing the door behind you. You snuck one last glance at his body through the waning sliver in the door as you pulled it shut.

You went back downstairs to retrieve your suitcase, pulling the address up on your phone and scanning the directions.

A few minutes later, Chris came down. He stood in front of you, presenting the blazer and slacks that were just slightly too long for him, and the two of you giggled. "You know, it's not a perfect fit, but it's close enough," you replied, heading towards the door.

Chris followed, getting into the passenger seat as you pulled open your driver's side and climbed in beside him. You dialed your connect as you backed out of your driveway, turning on your headlights, and throwing your car in drive once you reversed out onto the main room.

"What's up? You on your way?" The man on the other end of the phone answered. "Yeah, just letting you know I'm bringing my business partner with me. We're about ten minutes away," you said, looking over at Chris who reached for his joint that he had tucked behind his ear, and as he went to light it, you smacked the lighter out of his hand.

"What the fuck?" Chris asked in a voice just above a whisper, furrowing his brow at you. "It's room 152 when you get here," your guy told you over the phone. "Okay, see you soon," you replied, ending the call and snatching the joint from him.

"You're not smoking that shit in my car. I swear to God, Chris, if we get pulled over and you give the pigs a reason to search us, not only will it be the last run you ever make with me, it'll be the last run either one of us makes period because we'll both be sitting in prison," you told him, tossing the joint into your cup holder.

"Relaaax," he told you, drawing out the word. "No. If you're working with me, you follow my rules. If you relax, you get complacent. This is exactly why I don't do runs with weed dealers," you stated, shaking your head and regretting your decision to let him join you on your reup.

"Okay, ma. Damn. I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was so serious," he said, raising his hands in a defensive position. "Never break more than one law at a time. If we're ever doing a reup, we use our turn signals, we go the speed limit, and we don't stink up the car with pot," you responded, paying more attention to the road than you were to Chris.

"Alright, ma. I got it," Chris said, his tone softening. "Also, I know you can get away with smoking some of your own shit, because you just sell weed, but when it comes to the hard stuff, you don't get high on your own supply," you said, letting him in on your code.

"You test the product out on your gums when we pick it up, but that's as close as you get to doing the stuff we sell. The shit we're messing with is highly addictive, and you don't want all your hard-earned money disappearing up your nose," you sternly told him. "Don't worry, ma. I only do the natural shit," Chris said, peering out the window at all the streetlights.

As the two of you pulled into a parking spot outside a fancy hotel, it started to drizzle outside. You put the car in park and reached over Chris, pulling your shotgun out of your glove box. You hiked up your dress and tucked your weapon into your lace garter.

"Damn, ma. That thigh holster is kinda sexy," Chris rasped, his eyes drawn to your legs. You scoffed and narrowed your gaze at him, trying to act disgusted by his comment.

"Turn off your cell. Let me do the talking. I've only been doing business with this guy for about a year, but if he knows this is our first deal together, he'll call the whole thing off," you said, ignoring him and looking dead into his eyes before reaching for your suitcase in the backseat. He nodded at you.

"I'm trusting you, Chris. Don't fuck this up. This is a $300,000 deal that's gonna make me $150k in profit if I play my cards right." Chris' eyes widened. He'd never bought $300,000 worth of weed. Maybe in his lifetime, but not in one run.

The two of you got out of the car, and Chris snatched the joint back from out of your cup holder after turning off his phone and tucked it back behind his ear. Your heels clicked against the pavement as you approached the entrance of the hotel.

The two of you walked through the crowded lobby undetected, making your way up a flight of stairs. You guys headed down the long corridor, both sets of your shoes hitting the hideous paisley-printed carpet beneath you.

You approached the room, knocking softly on the door, and a few seconds later, your connect answered. He looked at both of you, looked both ways down the long hallway, and motioned for you guys to enter. "Okay, I got your stuff. You got my money?" Your supplier asked, presenting a suitcase on the hotel bed that was nearly identical to yours.

There were two men in sunglasses and nice suits who were standing behind him. You acknowledged them each with a nod out of respect, and your eyes wandered back over to your dealer. "It's all right here," you said, tossing your suitcase onto the bed beside his.

The two men in the room popped open the case and started running your cash through a money counter. Chris had been in the drug world for a few years, but he'd never seen so much money all at once, and he certainly hadn't met any dealers that had money counters on hand.

"Hey, I'm Chris. 'Sup gentleman?" Chris acknowledged the other two men as well. "What's your name?" Chris asked, extending his hand and smiling at your connect. "Uh. Miles," he hesitantly replied, glancing between both you and Chris.

Shit, you thought, widening your eyes and thinking about how you were going to ream Chris after this deal for not keeping his mouth shut.

"How you doing, Miles? I know my girl here is a loyal customer of yours, but I just wanted to let you know that I gotta guy that can get us the same shit for about $100k less. I know my girl here doesn't wanna take her business elsewhere, but I've been trying to convince her, because it's kind of a steal," Chris said.

Your jaw slightly fell open, still stunned that Chris was so comfortable talking to such high profile dealers he'd just met. "Who? Is it Diablo, man? That asshole is always trying to take my customers!" Miles slammed his fist down on the table.

"You know I don't like to name names in this industry. You're nicer to deal with anyway. I just was wondering if you could maybe sweeten the deal for us?" Chris asked, pulling the joint out from behind his ear and extending it as an offering.

"If you can knock down the price for us, I'm going to be helping my girl move this shit, so we'll do it twice as fast and be back to buy more in half the time. You'd be making money, really. Then you and your boys can share this joint in celebration of how much abundance and wealth you're going to see this year," Chris smirked.

Miles was silent for a moment as if he were actually mulling over the idea. He peered back at his men, who were both too stunned to speak, but they all shrugged and then silently nodded in agreement. "What do you say? $200k?" Chris inquired, raising his eyebrows and looking between the three men.

"I can't go that low. I got people to pay," Miles sternly shook his head. "How about $250,000?" Chris asked. "How about $275k, and I throw in an extra couple of kilos?" Miles offered. "What do you think, ma? Sound like a deal to you?" Chris asked, acknowledging that this was your deal, and that the final say was ultimately up to you.

Miles shifted his gaze towards you. You were dumbfounded and at a loss for words, but you nodded in response. "Alright. Pleasure doing business, Miles," Chris passed Miles the joint and gave him another stern handshake.

The two men opened up the suitcase they were handing off to you and put back $25,000 along with another two kilos of white powder that were strategically bagged tightly and wrapped snugly in plastic.

Chris' eyes subtly widened as his gaze traveled to the drugs. He had only seen cocaine a few times in his life, and it had always been in small quantities. Never 12 kilos worth. But he managed to keep his composure, hoping they couldn't detect that this was the first deal of this magnitude that Chris had closed, and they didn't.

"You don't mind if I test it, do you?" Chris asked, motioning towards the substance. "Not at all," Miles said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small baggy. He shook a bit of it out into Chris' palm. Chris licked his finger, dipped it into the powder, and ran it along his gums.

"Alright, Miles. This is some good shit," Chris complimented him, and the two of you made your way out the door, suitcase in hand, and you guys glided down the steps and out through the lobby doors.

"Holy shit, ma. I didn't know how much I could feel my teeth until I couldn't," Chris mumbled, surprised by the effects of the cocaine as the two of you stepped out into the rain.

It wasn't until you were each sitting side-by-side in the car that you finally spoke up. "Chris, how did you learn to do that?" You asked, peering over at him, the rain pitter pattering on your windshield. "I know how to talk to people," Chris nonchalantly told you, a smirk playing in the corner of his lip as he shrugged.

"Wait. Who's your other guy who could get it for $200k?" You asked, wrinkling your brows. "There is no other guy," Chris shrugged. "Just used a fake story as leverage. But now I know he has an enemy who's always stealing his clientele, Diablo. You know, kinda like how we were when you were just selling weed," Chris playfully nudged you in the arm.

"What were you going to do if he didn't budge?" You asked, searching his face for answers. "That's the thing. They always budge. He doesn't want to lose out on a sale," Chris told you. You stared at him in silent awe for a few seconds.

"Do you have any idea how much profit you just made me?" You asked him. "I've never been good at math, but I have a vague idea. I wanna split it. 50/50," he gave you a smug look. "How about 40/60," you suggested, raising an eyebrow at him. "Deal," he said without hesitation.

"Chris. That was single-handedly the hottest thing I've ever seen a man do," you admitted, your gaze dancing from his blue eyes to his pouty smile. You wanted to tear his clothes off right then and there and fuck him senseless in the back seat.

taglist: @skye-44 @bsturnzmtts @sturniolo-girl @theyluvme-2315 @jassturn @brookiecookie-18 @maggot3647 @slut4chriztopher @strnlslvr @sleepysturniolo @lvrsturniolo @sofieeeeex @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @matts-myloverboy @witchofthehour @slutforsturniolosss @sturniolosweetheart33 @whoahoahoahoahoa @ilovechrissturniolosposts @smt-obsessed @sturnioloxlver @that1fangirll @hrtz4alex2211 @luvhsien @sp3ncerslvt @sturniolo-munch44 @jakewebberswifee @ssturniolooss @thenickgurl @sturniolo-fann @sst7niolo @babysturniolo @chestersturniolo @riowritesitall @camzeecorner @mattsturnixlo @annedebeijer @scorpioosworld @mattlover-00 @sweetlikesug4rvenom @m11rx @sturniolocharms @mickelodeon-2003 @sigmarizzler1 @chrislova @stellarsturns @lelesturniolo @sturniolodoll @ilovemattsturn @blahbel668

"I know, ma. I know. By the way, you owe me a joint."

chapter two here ! 💸

[cloverapple]

How I Shift On Command + How You Can Too

I don’t plan on posting anything other than this or starting a blog, so I don’t need anyone to “believe” in me. The only person you should trust is yourself—trust yourself to resonate positively with what you see online and click away if it doesn’t serve you. This is here for you to take from if it resonates. I literally only made this blog to post this here. My hope is that it reaches at least one person who can take something from this and apply it to their shifting journey. If not, and this post ends up here untouched, I’m just glad to finally get everything down in words and off my chest. 

Jumping straight to the answer because I’m not going to make anyone sit through a long post for it. The rest, the "advice," is here if you want to read it.

The "method"

I figured out what works specifically for me as an individual instead of following everyone else’s journey. Everyone has their “thing” that makes shifting click, a sweet spot that makes reality shifting possible. For me, it’s a combination of the law of assumption and inducing an altered state of consciousness.

During the day, I spend time affirming—or sometimes just reminding myself or keeping a little note nearby—things like:

I can shift.

I know how to shift.

I could shift tonight.

Shifting is accessible to me.

At night, I watch videos, look at Pinterest boards, or listen to music that reminds me of my DR. This ingrains where I’m going in my brain. Sometimes I do this for fun, and other times I skip it entirely.

When I lay down, I always lie on my back and stay somewhat still because I like the feeling of my body going numb. This isn’t necessary to shift, but I enjoy it—it lets me feel the symptoms of hypnagogia (that in-between state of wakefulness and sleep).

To meditate quickly, I count from 1 to 100 with a few affirmations in between to remind myself of what I’m doing. I do this until my body goes numb, and I start messing up the counting. Usually, the mistakes or random, nonsensical thoughts are my signal to start shifting.

At this point, I begin affirming the things I affirmed during the day:

I could shift right now.

I have the ability to shift.

I have the power to shift at any moment.

While I do this, I focus on the feeling of being in my DR—not my surroundings, not my senses, just the internal feeling of being there.

This is where “brazen impudence” comes in. I hard-force myself to feel like I’m in my DR. It’s not about imagining my surroundings but purely about embodying the feeling of being there.

Hypnagogic imagery and sensations like floating often kick in at this point. These are symptoms of your body falling asleep so your awareness can take shape in that sweet spot for shifting.

I continue this, then stop and start counting from 1 to 100 again, with affirmations like:

I can shift.

I know how to shift.

I could shift right now.

Then I repeat the process: using brazen impudence to force myself to feel like I’m in my DR.

Eventually, I reach that threshold between sleep and wake—a liminal state of pure consciousness. Body asleep, mind awake, I call this the “rabbit hole” which is honstly just a deep state of hypnogogia. It’s a state where anything is possible: lucid dreaming, astral projection, slipping into the void, shifting—anything.

When I’m in this state, I use brazen impudence to force myself to feel like I'm shifting to my DR and don't take no for an answer (I tell myself I'm in Barbados and shut the door in my own face). This can involve affirmations or just talking myself through it, either way I wake myself up there. Occasionally, I simply relax, expect to wake up in my DR, fall asleep, and wake up shifted.

Does all that sound complicated? Let me simplify:

Lay down and get comfortable.

Count from 1 to 100 on a loop with affirmations in between until you mess up the counting, get sleepy, or have your mind wander. Like this:

Me: *counts from 1 - 100* Me: *says a few affirmations/askfirmations* Me: *counts from 1 - 100* Me: *says a few affirmations/askfirmations*

On a loop until...

Persist in the feel of being in your DR—not focusing on surroundings or senses, just the feeling. Feeling is the secret.

Alternate between steps 2 and 3 until you’re in that relaxed body asleep/mind awake state, OR just straight up hypnogogia tbh. (That is, if you don’t already shift lol)

From there, choose what feels right: shift from a lucid dream, affirm, slip into the void, or just feel yourself in your DR like I do, convince yourself that either you shifted and are there, or are shifting and will end up there.

One thing I’ll tell you now—regardless of your circumstances, how long you’ve been trying, how long it’ll take, who you are, etc—is that you already know how to shift. You, reading this right now. You know how to shift, and there’s nothing you did to learn it. There’s nothing you can do to unlearn it. It’s something that will stay with you until the end of time.

Why do you think people shift randomly without prior knowledge of shifting? Even people who don’t believe in it? It’s because everyone can shift. You can shift.

Right now, stop reading this post and say in your head or out loud, “I already know how to shift.” Or, if that doesn’t feel right, “I already have the ability to shift,” “No matter what, I have the power to shift,” or “My mind knows how to shift no matter what.”

Can you argue that? No, you can’t. And if your mind starts throwing out “buts,” go back and read that again.

Shifting isn’t difficult, and no one struggles to shift. I’m sure you’ve heard it before—that shifting is simple and happens in seconds—because it does. You don’t struggle with shifting. You can shift; everyone has the power to. What you “struggle” with, so to speak, is figuring out what works for you, what your brain likes, how it operates—because everyone is different.

What ended up working for me more than anything was figuring out how I operate and modifying shifting to fit me—not forcing myself to fit shifting.

Will my method work for everyone? I have no idea. Unless you assume it will work for you, this is what works for me. I’m me, and you’re you.

Before you say “Oh, but I’ve tried everything and nothing has worked so far” and expect me to sit here and ask you “but have you really tried everything? <3” , listen to me. 

I could shift perfectly well with my own personal method before I started shifting regularly. I knew it worked well for my brain, but the thing that “blocked” me (so to speak) were my assumptions. 

When you sit there and say “I’ve tried everything and nothing has worked” that’s your assumption about yourself. You believe that nothing works for you, that you don't know how to shift, that you’re this powerless, lost baby shifter who needs guidance. 

There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s not your fault, and theoretically you could shift even with your “blockages” (I really hate that term), as shifting waits for no one.

This is why so many people shift randomly and with poor assumptions without meaning to. But you clicked on this because you want to know how you can shift consistently + on every time, and this is the answer I’m giving you. 

You find out what works better for you, be it affirming, visualizing, scripting, shifting awake, shifting asleep, shifting with hypnagogia, shifting with hypnopompic, shifting through lucid dreams, shifting with brazen impudence, through SATs, robotic affirming, through letting go, through putting your DR on a pedestal, through listening to music, through law of assumption alone, and many more. 

If that sounds overwhelming, please note that all of these are the same vehicles that get you to your destination. Just in different shapes and colors. Like how some people drive a car, others drive a motorcycle, others walk, others swim. The movement forward is always the same. 

What you’re doing, no matter how you’re doing it or in whatever state of consciousness you’re doing it from, will always be:

Assume it's true, feel it, receive it. “Assume and persist,” “ground yourself in the assumption,” you’ve heard it all before. 

How to Find What Makes You Shift On Command

You could either test different techniques (affirmations, visualizations, scripting, lucid dreaming, etc.) and see what feels natural to you. 

You could (and I love this one because it’s a cheat code) Assume you already know what works, and let the law of assumption guide you. “Manifest it” so to speak. 

Pay attention to your life, because you already shift on command, you've been doing it your whole life, but I guarantee you haven't noticed it. Pay attention to you, like how easily you slip into hypnagogia, your dream recall, or how strong your intuition is, maybe you put too much emotion into a scenario you don’t want in your life and it inherently manifests, things like that. Pay attention to the thing that makes you go “huh, that was weird”

“But Clover, I tried everything you mentioned above and still haven’t found my method!” 

My darling. Listen up. Come closer—I’m about to let you in on a secret. The way you apply the law of assumption isn’t one-size-fits-all, because assumptions and beliefs are not linear. It's the same every time, yes, it's a law. But just like you, the way you can use it is unique to each person.

Let me tell you how easy it is so you don't think I'm over-complicating it

You could, for instance, believe you’ve got $1000 in your bank account right now and act like it, fully living in the end. Or you could believe you’re going to have $1000 in your account and act like it’s already on its way. Or maybe you believe something’s going to happen that’ll bring you that $1000.

The same applies to shifting. It’s been a game changer for me. I used to struggle so much with things like:

“You’re already in your DR, just act like it.”

“Ignore the 3D.”

“You’ve already shifted.”

Do those methods work? Absolutely, they work beautifully. But like I said, if it doesn’t feel good or true to you, don’t force it.

My dearest, darling reader. If the story you see in your 3D is that you can’t shift, can’t find what makes you shift, are you just going to sit there and accept it? What is more satisfying? Think with me here: accepting that you don’t know how to shift and cannot shift, or persisting that you do know how to shift? 

“Clover, but I’ve been trying for 4 years! I’ve tried everything and I still haven’t shifted”

So that's your story? Your story, your assumption is that you’ve been trying for 4 years and haven’t shifted? If you’ve resonated with the phrase above, that’s your story. And there’s nothing wrong with it, but! there will be no magic solution for shifting. Or a magic method. Or a person like me giving you advice, that can make you shift without you changing your assumptions first.

“But I don’t want to reprogram my mind! It doesn’t work for me. I don’t want to do robotic affirming 24/7, I want results now!” 

I know, right? It’s annoying having to do these 100-step methods, and drink charged water, and have to beg the universe for your desire, and loop affirmations in your mind that directly contradict what you’re experiencing in the 3D.

“Oh ignore the 3D, the 4D is your only real imagination!” they say, as you sit there, clutching your phone, rocking back and forth in bed, repeating affirmations you don’t resonate with while dreaming of being railed by your S/O.

Believe me, I've been there, wondering what the hell was wrong with me. I asked myself why couldn't these basic steps that worked for everyone else work for me. I blamed myself for not trying hard enough, for being lazy, for inconsistent. When all that time, the answer was me. I needed to manifest/shift in a way that felt good for me.

Just remember, the law of assumption isn't complicated, and the way you apply it is not one-size-fits-all. Reprogramming the mind through continuous repetition and affirmation works, and if that resonates with you or feels effective, you should absolutely go for it.

However, at its core, you don’t inherently need to reprogram your mind. It’s as simple as assuming your mind has already been reprogrammed and watching it unfold before your eyes. You do what feels right to you.

For example, if person A does better with visualization and listening to music, why on earth are they affirming and listening to subliminals?

If person B feels better scripting in a notebook, why the hell are they reprogramming their mind?

If person C feels good reprogramming their mind, why are they taking the simple route?

Funny, isn't it? Which is why if you've read all of this so far, and you have not resonated with it, just click away. Go find another post or advice that feels true to you. The words I'm writing right now are not universal, they're not the absolute truth. That's the beauty of the law of assumption. Whatever you believe to be true, becomes true.

I didn’t feel good with the affirmations “I’m already in my DR” and “I already shifted.” Do they work, are they true? Yup, but I didn’t feel good ignoring the 3D, even when I knew the 4D was the true reality. So I swapped them for affirmations like "I'm shifting to my DR", “I’m going to shift to my DR”, swapping things like “I already shifted” to “I’m shifting” because those are the kinds of affirmations my brain loves. 

I've heard a silly bit of misinfo that these affirmations stating future events put you in an infinite loop, and that they don’t make you achieve your desire. That’s not true? At all? Makes me laugh, really. Because here I am, “master shifter” or whatever name people give it in this reality, shifting as much as I want to wherever I want with these types of affirmations.

Yet here I see every day on the internet, people implanting stubborn little rules and regulations to a practice that has been done for ages, a universal law that will work even when you don’t care for it to work. 

How I Shifted The First Time

The law of assumption is what made me shift in the end. Initially, I surprised myself at the beginning of my shifting journey because I shifted three months after starting it. I woke up one morning in my DR room, felt it was real, knew it was possible, but accidentally shifted back because it was too good to be true. 

What followed was a period of losing my mind; I shift back to my DR for a few seconds (mini-shifts), fully shifted to different rparallel ealities, and filled the hell out of shifting journals with my discoveries as I went along. But I never fully shifted to my DR and stayed there. I wanted to permashift. I was so focused on leaving my CR and going to my DR permanently, frustrated because I knew I could shift, knew how to in theory, but was stuck in this endless loop of assuming I couldn't make myself shift and had to rely on spontaneous shifts.

And then one night it clicked when I was reflecting on the law of assumption and reality shifting. I knew shifting was real. I knew I could shift. Everyone can shift. I had shifted before. I would continue to shift even if I gave up on shifting. I could shift that night if I wanted to. I could shift that night even if I didn't want to. I knew how to shift. And so do you.

These are all assumptions I went to sleep with in mind, laying there, feeling like an idiot as it all clicked for me. 

If there was no doubt in my mind that I could shift that night, why wouldn’t I be able to shift? 

What followed was an overwhelming sense of peace washing over me. I let go. What more was there to be done? I could shift. There was no crying or screaming that could make me shift more than I could right then. 

I laid there and started my process. Just like I mentioned earlier. I began counting from 1 - 100 on a continuous loop. With affirmations that I could shift, I knew how to shift , I could shift that night.

And then I reached hypnagogia, and began inducing the feeling of being in my DR, just like I mentioned earlier. That liminal space rabbit hole shortly followed. I could go anywhere I wanted then. I could lucid dream. I could astral project. I could slip into the void. I could shift, and I did. Just…letting go and inducing the feeling of being in my DR. Not the surroundings, not the 5 senses, no affirmations. Just knowing that I was in my Dr. 

It was peaceful. 

I was at ease. 

And then I was woken up by a violent crack of thunder because my dumbass scripted my DR wakeup scenario to be in the middle of spring, and it was raining -_- 

I woke up in my DR, fully grounded, fully there, pinching my skin purple because I couldn't believe I was looking out the window at my DR city.

I wish I could tell you that I remained cool, but I so didn’t. I sat in bed for a good 10 minutes, mouth agape, repeating “oohh fuck it’s real….ohhh my god it’s real…whaaat the hell.” 

And then I paced around my room panicking, giggling like an idiot, checking my DR phone because all my friends and DR life was on there as evidence, opening drawers, looking at myself in the mirror, and straight-up freaking out. 

What followed after that was incredible, something I lack the words to describe. I spent a few weeks in my DR before shifting back, spending a few weeks here and then shifting back–here, back, here, back and forth, spending more time in my DR then my CR to the point where I consider my DR my true reality, and this one as my “other” reality. 

I shifted back here in early December of last year, and I’m here now before I shift back permanently—meaning, I’ll shift there, and then the next time I shift will be to another DR or a waiting room somewhere in the multiverse. I’m taking a "break" so to speak and hanging out here until events I scripted in my DR start to happen, and my life changes (positively, all good things I assure). 

I’m not sure if the person or people who find this post will care, but my other reality was originally called my “Witch DR”, where, as the name suggests, I’m a witch :) But not the fun kind, with a broomstick, a cauldron, and a pet cat though 😂The kind where I have to be up early for work in the mornings, can’t keep a cat because the building I live in doesn’t allow it, and have more responsibilities there than I do in this reality. 

One thing I didn’t expect about shifting before I lived there the first time is that—it’s life. You will have good days. You will have bad days. You will fuck up. You will laugh so hard that soda comes out of your nose. You will cry more than you ever have. And the people you once saw on a TV screen are very real, and can be very annoying lol. I miss my DR friends dearly right now, but I can’t go poking around the internet for videos and pictures of them because it feels so weird. 

Gut feelings are strange. I use them as a compass in both realities whenever I have to manually flap the butterfly’s wings and take a route. I felt compelled to write this post, and I’m not sure why. But if what this post has the power to help one singular person and help them realize their power, I'll be beyond happy.

[lustlovehart]

This is like my first ask ever so I'm a bit nervous, but I've been thinking abt monter!twst nonstop so I just had to make an ask. What would the boys do (including Rollo) if mh!reader was on a mission and got put under a sleeping curse?

I'd imagine it'd be pretty distressing, imaging Rollo trying to keep the monsters away while looking for a cure for reader.

Love the au also! Keep up the good work!

- milk 🥛 anon

A/n: Ahhhh!!! Hi 🥛 anon!!! Don’t ever be nervous putting stuff in my inbox <33 I’ve said this before but I love reading everyone’s ideas!! Even if i don’t get to writing them </3

Featuring: [Monster!Twst] Heartslaybul, Savanaclaw, Octavinelle, Scarabia, Pomefiore, Ignihyde, Diasmonia, Rollo, Neige, Fellow, Skully, Chenya x Reader

Cw: Head canon format ( So no individual scenarios unfortunately), Obsession, Possessiveness, Kissing, Insecurity, No proofreading

Unfortunately, Poor Rollo has to deal with BOTH swatting them away like flies, and checking up to make sure you’re not suffering in your time of rest with nightmares 😔 (a wanting to be married to you single mom who works 2 jobs).

I like to imagine fairytales still exist within the universe, but they don’t reach their ears in the wild. It’s only Heartslaybul, Leona, Kalim, and Epel who have any idea of the “Kiss of true love”, and then words spreads around of these human stories and suddenly it’s less about getting your body back and more about being the one who wakes you up…

Why would he wanna kiss you? That’s stupid nothing’s gonna happen… Maybe one—?

- Ace, Jamil, Epel, Sebek

- Depending on his personality, he’s either going “Ew gross i’m not kissing a human” or “Those humans tales are foolish, why would i believe them?”. But either view end them in the same boat, standing over your slumbering form and hesitantly leaning into your face. Maybe he isn’t fast with it either, taking his time to look at the details in your mortal face, pores, eyelashes, everything really. It’s stupid, so stupid he shouldn’t believe any of this really, it’s vulnerable, emotional, unnecessary; yet, he can’t seem to stop himself from placing his monstrous mouth on yours, hoping something will happen.

Wants to kiss you, but feels a sense of insecurity that holds him back

- Riddle, Deuce, Cater, Ruggie, Jack, Azul, Idia, Silver

- Similar to the previous category, but slightly different. They don’t oppose the idea of a kiss at all, what really has them fearing their lips on yours, is both the vulnerability, and the event of it not working. What then? He puts himself out there for you and it’s pointless? It’s cruel, a further reminder of just how different you both are. He will look at you with pain in his eyes, wondering what he should do. Ghastly hands taking your own as he lifts them to his mouth. He might not be able to bring himself to your lips, but he’s willing to settle on your skin. He just… can’t bear the thought that he wasn’t made for you.

He’ll try, it sounds fun! When, not if, you wake up, he’ll make sure to tell you about everyone’s current violence problem.

- Trey, Floyd, Jade, Rook, Lilia, Fellow, Chenya

- Practically jumping at the chance to place his mouth on you. Of course he’ll wake you up! You’re a lot more fun when you up and about trying to hunt him down! The thought of it not working does cross his mind, but is he truly an all famed beast if he can’t take risks? He lucked out on Rollo being gone, he’s essentially a human version of a brick wall. He’ll go out all out for you, snaking his arm around your waist and lifting you out the glass coffin liking a loving husband. He’ll swirl you around with care, before dipping you down like a ballroom dance, and then wake you up. He can’t wait to show off to everyone else, because you will open your eyes.

He’ll do it. if his try doesn’t work though… He’ll make sure no one eleses does either. Your sleeping body will forever be held with him until you wake up.

- Leona, Kalim, Vil, Malleus, Neige, Skully

- He’s already sat by your side, his hand tracing patterns into your collarbone while he whispers. Will you wake up for him? You will won’t you? You must. Silent affirmations only he and he only will know, unless you wake up of course. His finger will trace down your chest, tapping the place your heart would be, each touch in sync with the beat of your heart. It’s gentle, yet somehow possessive in some right. With the final beat of his index, he’ll finally lean down, his face feeling your breathes on his fiendish skin. You’ll wake up, not because he believes in the tale, but because you must let him be the one who does something so intimate to you. If it doesn’t work, he’ll put you in prettier clothes, a prettier coffin, a prettier home, because he won’t let anyone else have the blessing of tasting your lips, only him.

The one who places your body in the pretty glass coffin, putting you in the prettiest of wear and scenery during his attempt; all while warding off the wretched creatures.

- Rollo

- Practically spends every waking and sleeping moment in your presence, only leaving for at most 5 minutes. Unfortunately for him, 5 minutes is enough time for anything to happen to you. He’ll hold your hands, fix your clothes, place new flowers and ribbons on your coffin, anything for you; except be the one who kisses you. The urge to consumes his entire being, eating at him like a sinful leech who wont let go. Sometimes whenever he’s by you, his eyes can’t help but trace back to your lips, a temptation too good for any man or beast to resist, but he does, because he can’t bear the thought of stripping you’re purity, directly at least. Whenever the urge becomes much too strong, he’ll lean down, placing a kiss on your knuckle, on your wrist, on your forehead, on your cheek, on your collarbone, on your neck, on your chest, even on the corner of your mouth, until the only place he hasn’t placed his mouth on is your lips. An indulgence he won’t take no matter how much he wishes to. Because…

You don’t deserve a monsters love, not matter how much he wishes to be yours and yours alone.

You are the sole blessing he has left, he won’t taint you, no matter how much he wishes too. But… he won’t let anyone else take you either.

A/n: For Floyd, Jade, and Sebek I realized half way that these guys wouldn’t be able to reach you on land if that’s where you were laid to rest, a perfect scenario for Rollo really. Imagine his surprise when he opens your room and sees tiny imps dragging your coffin out and into the river, where a horrific marine monster takes hold of you… Truly, how desperate for you are they?!? (Rollo has no room to judge considering he’s just as obsessed)

This honestly makes Floyd and Jade scenario so pretty <3 being in pretty clothes while he ball dances with you in the water, dipping you down while clear water envelops your upper half, leaving only your pretty face <33 do you guys see the vision?!?

And trey? He doesn’t seem like the type to be in that category, but hear me out, he does it low-key. He doesn’t go all out like the others guys so it’s not as cocky, yet there’s the underlying feeling of bragging that they can get mad and but can’t outright criticize him for. Same goes for kalim, he doesn’t seem like the type to do such a thing, but in this case, he can’t help but feel a little jealous if it isn’t him who wakes you up.

[basuralindo]

Yeah. That.

If you're actively caught up in a delusion, and someone tells you it's not true with no evidence or bothering to check -just dismisses your belief as bullshit, your mind isn't going to accept it as true. That's the thing about delusions, if you were in a mental state to "werewolves aren't real and everything is fine" and believe it, you wouldn't be in that state in the first place.

What actually happens when you tell an actively delusional person that their delusion is fake is more likely along the lines of them becoming convinced that either you may be part of the threat (which can escalate the delusion from "there is a random event happening to me" to "there is a conspiracy against me, someone is doing this to me, and anyone may be in cahoots with them. I can no longer trust doctors or law enforcement"), or that the threat is more insidious than they realized, and nobody else can see what's happening (which can lead to hiding it and lying about being okay and trying to "fix the situation " themselves, while not believing anyone who tries to tell them it's not happening).

Basically, if someone is experiencing a delusion centered around paranoia, then any direct rejection/dismissal of that delusion will likely become incorporated into the paranoia, and overall the stress of trying to seek help from people who refuse to see the issue will usually make the delusion worse. Even when I'm having mild delusions that I can tell are probably delusions on my own, if I try to get someone to help prove it's safe and they dismiss me completely without checking, it pretty much always makes the delusion more intense and feeds into a paranoia that something bad is going to happen and nobody will help me so I have to be extra careful and secretly prepare for the worst and stay vigilant etc.etc.

What actually helps during a delusion, is finding someone who believes you and takes the threat seriously enough to look into it. That proves to you that they understand the situation and can be trusted to know what they're doing and what they're talking about, so once they've investigated the situation and come back with evidence that it's not happening and you're actually safe, then you can believe them. That relief and ability to relax helps your mind wind down from the fear and stress that fed into a delusional state to begin with, and once you've come out of the delusional state (I'm familiar with bipolar, idk if other psychoses let you come out of it the same way sorry), then it can be possible to talk about what happened and why it wouldn't be realistic, and discuss plans to recognize if the delusion is returning and talk yourself down from it before it goes too far. It's a long process and requires careful timing and handling. Pushing too hard or too fast in the wrong ways can and will make everything worse. However, playing into the delusion and adding on to it is absolutely not the same thing and does a lot of harm, don't fucking do that. There's a difference between playing along to wind someone down and just straight playing imagination games with their sense of reality.

So what you can do from the outside is try to calm them down by convincingly them that they are currently safe, that you understand what they're talking about and know how to take care of it (or that a medical professional knows how to handle it and you can keep them safe until they arrive/you get them to the er). And then you do like those doctors mentioned and take reasonable steps to investigate the situation and provide proof that there's no threat. Don't make them feel stupid for being scared in the first place (again, that can trigger more stress and feed into delusional spirals). Approach it in a way that allows for dignity and trust in the conclusion.

For example, think if you smelled gas and called the fire department to investigate, and they just told you "if you don't own any gas appliances then it's not gas, don't waste our time", you'd assume they're incompetent and you'd need to investigate yourself, but wouldn't be able to trust calling them back if you're still smelling it, right? So you'd spend the rest of the night in fear and not knowing what to do or who to call if it gets worse and imagining what might happen, yeah? But if they sent someone out to go check your property and they found the cause of the smell, which turned out to be something benign and not a gas leak, then you could assume they know what they're doing and that their conclusion is reliable, and sleep easy knowing you're safe after all. Especially if they discussed with you how to differentiate the smell of gas from whatever the actual cause was, so you can tell for yourself next time. If someone is experiencing a delusion, treat them as if there really is a gas smell, you just need to prove to them that it's not actually a dangerous gas

No doctor will ever get my respect like the woman in the ER who checked me for claws and fangs because I told her I was turning into a werewolf and could feel it and let me know gently that she couldn't find any but that didnt make it feel any less real, like THATS how you do it, other doctors who just flat out told me I was wrong take notes