#does this make any sense. i'm kinda fried sorry

[clowningaroundmars]

i know "julie kapulsky" as a name is a play on juliet capulet bc mike is supposed to be her romeo but wouldn't it be wild if her name was also lowkey inspired by janus, the greek god of bridges, duality, passageways and transitions

[babacontainsmultitudes]

do you have any headcanons about what kinda piercings the kiddads have?? i have been thinking about it for a couple days now and im so........... :3

:D Oh hiiiii ALSO YES THANK YOU FOR ASKING I DO ACTUALLY well actually I'd have to think about this a bit more for a full answer but immediately:

Sparrow definitely has a belly button piercing and nothing in this world could convince me otherwise LOL he probably also has the basic piercings on the lobes of his ears too;

Ok ok Terry I don't think makes use of his piercings very often *anymore* but back in the day was probably rocking a shit ton- but I *think* just on his ears. Spiky goth-punk looking ones, as well as plugs. Oh maybe a nose ring as well;

Okay Grant! Aha. Grant has always *wanted* piercings and like I think he finds them very attractive but I don't think he ever actually bothered to get any? His friends have offered to do it for him but. How to put this. I think he likes the *idea* of getting a piercing, both for how it would look but also for how it would feel (y'know Grant and his issues lol), so much so that I think part of what stops him is the fear that it doesn't live up to his expectations? Does that make sense??? My brain is fried hopefully this makes a tiny bit of sense lol. He still thinks about getting some though haha. One day!

NICKY MY PIERCING MODEL ahem I am too shy and insecure of my own art to pull it up (especially since yours is so good shjsisksks) haha but at the most basic level definitely some double helix rings and basic lobes (<- I usually like to give him long, dangly earrings from the lobes), NIPPLE PIERCINGS 👏 (sorry I feel strongly about this lmao), and maybe a nose ring but I don't think he wears that one as often. Oh, and lip piercings! Ah. And maybe one in a place that would force me to up the age rating of this post 😌. Heh, Nicky <3

I'm ALWAYS torn on how I feel about Lark and piercings. Maybe the same as Sparrow's but somehow with a different vibe? Maybe just basic lobes? Maybe none at all? It's unclear. But I do know one thing, which is that he's definitely the best at actually performing a clean piercing on someone lol.

:] thanks for the ask! You're more than welcome to share your own piercing headcanons if you'd like!

[hawkeyedflame]

Hi! Hope I'm not bothering you too much with this ask, but I've got some questions about carnivore diet.

Can you explain why you don't eat eggs and dairy? Is there some evidence that this is better/what is the evidence? And the same about other types of meat - why is pork and chicken 'bad'/'worse'? Is it because of their diet leading the meat to not contain enough nutrients?

What about subproducts, like liver or heart or stomach?

And lastly, I'm a bit conflicted, since carnivore diet is ketogenic, how much contraindications are there? Is it well researched? I mean, if a person does not have a gallbladder, for example, it is usually recommended to eat often and to not consume a lot of fat. Sorry to bombard you with questions, but your advocacy for it got me really curious.

Hi there! You're not bothering me at all. Let me try to answer these as best I can. Please bear in mind that carnivore for me, and for many others, is used to address autoimmune illness and thus the "rules" I follow may not be necessary for you depending on your health history and reasons for wanting to try the diet. This got kinda long so I'll put it all under the cut.

Dairy: for me it is an allergy. Many many carnivores continue to eat dairy with no problems. I have found that pasteurized dairy, particularly cheese and yogurt, gives me acne. I am currently in the process of testing unpasteurized, grassfed milk to see if it causes the same reaction (there is some thought that pasteurization may denature proteins in such a way that they become allergenic for some people, probably particularly people with autoimmune illnesses. I'm not sure if there is any real research on this, but it's a common phenomenon that people who can't tolerate pasteurized dairy can tolerate raw dairy). If I don't have any issues with raw milk, I will attempt raw yogurt/cheese/butter as well.

Eggs: I honestly just don't really like eggs very much. It's possible they are an allergy for me, as I used to eat them scrambled a lot before I went to meat-only. I have not tested them, and the number of eggs I would have to eat to constitute a meal is just silly, so it seems like a waste of money. I know a lot of carnivores like to slap a fried egg on their steaks or eat hard boiled eggs as a snack on the go. It's just not for me.

Non-ruminant animals: animals that are monogastric (one stomach) are understood to break down less of the chemicals in the food they're ingesting. Ruminants have so many layers of digestion in their many stomachs that, by the time the nutrients are absorbed and distributed around their bodies, they're generally not carrying over any potential toxins/allergens. People with very serious autoimmune issues have a reaction to eating chicken, pork, and other non-ruminant meat, theoretically due to the plant toxins present in trace amounts in the meat. This is especially true for conventionally-raised animals that are not eating their proper, natural diets.

If you don't have any autoimmune concerns, go ahead and eat non-ruminant meat if you like. I eat it occasionally, although I have noticed that both chicken and pork do cause minor digestive problems for me that stop me from eating them regularly.

Organ meat: the debate rages eternal about whether organ meats are necessary to eat or not. While it's true that they pack a nutritional punch, there are a great many carnivores who do not eat them at all and their health, both self reported and bloodwork, is fine. My opinion is that if you like organ meats, eat them, but probably more sparingly. If you think about it, 50,000 years ago when we were hunting megafauna, we would kill one very large animal for the group and eat the meat of it for weeks/months. The organs only make up a very small part of the animal's edible mass and must be shared with everyone, so to me it does not make sense to be eating lots of organ meat all the time. But if you enjoy organs, then more power to you.

I hope this helps! I tried to keep it kinda short because it's so close to my bedtime haha but if you have any follow-up questions then you know where to find me!

As far as I know there are no contraindications for carnivore, or for ketogenic diets in general. Both diets have been used to treat pretty much every illness under the sun, from all mental health disorders to diabetes type 1 and 2, cancer, cardiovascular diseases, autoimmune illnesses, epilepsy, neurodegenerative and neurodevelopmental disorders, etc. Ketosis is increasingly being understood as humans' primary metabolic state, meaning that our bodies are designed to run optimally off of ketones, not glucose. The rapid growth of our brains is associated evolutionarily with a massive increase in meat consumption, and in fact since the extinction of most megafauna just prior to the agricultural revolution (about 10,000 years ago), which forced us to both eat plants constantly and to hunt smaller, faster, leaner animals, our brains have shrunk approximately 11%. It seems pretty logical to me that our bodies prefer fatty meat.

Concerning a removed gallbladder specifically, I have heard doctors address this issue. If I remember correctly, the answer is that you can be keto/carnivore without a gallbladder, but you have to consolidate the majority of your fat consumption into one meal or else you will have digestive issues. If you don't have a gallbladder I would recommend looking into this yourself (a quick YouTube search should get you plenty of information) so you are fully informed.

[mylittlesecrethaven]

Bsd Is Kinda A Genius Anime: Pt 3

I think I had a plan for these next few posts, but I can't remember them, so Ima do what I want.

Since these groups are so small, I'm doing both.

Today it's Decay of Angels (which has three different names depending on if you watch the dub, sub, or look at the Fandom, so wtf?) and Hunting Dogs.

So let's do it!

(FUCK IT, IT'S LATE I'M ONLY DOING DECAY OF ANGELS! I'LL DO HUNTING DOGS NEXT TIME I'M TIRED AND I WANNA FINISH THIS I'M SO SORRY BUT I AM BRAIN FRIED)

(Emm... two things. I'm aware that Decay of Angels gets its name from a novel, but unless that's brought up in a character, I'm not going over it. Also, Kamui and Ochi Fukuchi are the same person? Soooo.... I'll go over him with Decay of Angels I guess....)

Ochi Fukuchi

Ability: Mirror Lion

The Fandom actually didn't have much on this guy's RLC, so Ima try my best, but no guarantees since it's fucking 10:30 and this is my last post of the night. ---- I still can't find much actually about him. Even his Wiki page (yes, I use Wikipedia) is lacking. I do know about his ability counterpart though. Mirror Lion is a play written by his RLC about a woman who's practicing a lion dance for New Year's, and because she becomes so engrossed in it, the spirit of the lion enters her. Just thinking about this, it is similar to his actual ability. He makes his weapons stronger, a lot like what you'd expect if the spirit of a lion entered somebody. I couldn't find anything talking about his RLC having a connection to this guy's reason for leading both the Hunting Dogs and the Decay of Angels. (I don't know his reason in the show, I'm only on episode 4.) Not much to go on really. Not a good start.

Bram Stoker

Ability: Infection

He's a vampire?! Wtf?! Ohhhh.... I get it. Ok. His RLC wrote Dracula. Makes sense. Makes sense. His RLC is also Irish, so I kinda wonder if his VA does an accent like Fyodor's does. Anyway, you can see the symbolism, yes? Dracula is a vampire, and apparently Bram is impaled, relating to Vlad the Impaler, who was the inspiration for Dracula. Easy-peasy.

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Ability: Crime And Punishment

And now to the man himself. I've been interested in doing this for him since I talked about his ability. So let's see what I can find. His RLC wrote a lot of dark and gritty books involving human emotions and psychology. (I know what author I'm looking for in the library next.) This fits how Fyodor acts pretty well. You'd expect books like that to revolve around someone like Fyodor. Hmmm... I just looked at a summary of "Crime And Punishment," and I found.... nothing. It's about this poor guy who plans to kill an old woman with a lot of valuables and steal them, but after he does that, he's wracked with guilt, and goes through a ton of mental anguish, and he has to live through the consequences of his deed. This... doesn't do anything for figuring out his ability. I know Fyodor's ability can let him manipulate people's memories, and that's connected to the book, but it doesn't help figure out who his ability affects or how he can control it! So for now, I'm gonna stick with the idea that Fyodor can't kill gifteds, because I can't find anything or anyone talking about the gifteds he's killed with his ability. Moving on the book that inspired the Rats in the House of the Dead, "The House of the Dead," it's a semi-autobiographical novel about a fictional person going through life in a Siberian prison camp, based loosely on Fyodor's RLC's time in a forced-labor prison camp. Emmm..... Idk. I guess it kinda connects to the fact that the group was really temporary? Idk. I'm getting brain fried right now, so if anybody has any idea for connections to the Rats in the House of the Dead, lemme know.

Nikolai Gogol

Ability: The Overcoat

Oh shit, he's Ukranian? I thought the name was Russian. My bad. Oh, wait, his RLC is a Russian of Ukranian origin. I don't understand what that means, but whatever. His RLC wrote a ton of books, usually all tragedy with slight shifts in genre, such as political tragedies and tragecomedies. "The Overcoat" was a short story written by Nikolai's RLC about.... oh shit this book is insane. It's about this poor man who's made fun of for his coat at work, so he obsesses over saving money and buying a new one. He finally does and shows it off so happily, but on his way home he gets beat up by two ruffians and they steal his coat. The police won't help him, and after being recommended to ask by someone else at work, he asks a higher up at work, only to be yelled at for disturbing the higher up with a trivial matter. A little afterwards, the man falls ill and dies. A ghost is soon seen around the city taking people's overcoats, and it's the man's ghost. The police can't catch him. He finds the higher up who yelled at him and spooks him, then steals his overcoat. His ghost isn't seen again. The story ends by talking about another ghost sighting, which meets the description of one of the ruffians. Insane, right? Which I guess fits Nikolai. Anyway, his ability really comes from what another author said about the book, which was "We all came out from under Gogol's Overcoat." So.... yeah.

Sigma

Ability: Information Exchange

My last one and then I can sleep..... please.... sleep.... Wait. This guy doesn't have an RLC. What? Oh. So apparently he has memory loss, which could be the link to him not having an RLC? Idk.

Anyway, next I'll be doing Hunting Dogs. That should be fun.

(I really need to stop doing these right before I go to sleep. *sigh*)

[koifishanonymous]

I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED ABOUT GOOD OMENS !!!

for the past twelve weeks i have thought about little else besides aziracrow and idk i don't really agree with the sides the fandom is taking

from what i've seen people are split between thinking aziraphale was lying/was drugged/otherwise unable to be truthful and thinking aziraphale truly believes that heaven can be changed.

and then both sides say shit like ''oh if you believe xyz then you don't understand aziraphale !!1!1!!!1" and i vehemently disagree with both sides. also no one 'understands' aziraphale besides the show's writers lol.

i think, aziraphale did have to lie because

a) he literally says, verbatim, "I don't want to go back to Heaven 😦 ☕👌"

b) we don't actually see the conversation with the metatron from an objective perspective nor do we see his offer to make crowley an angel

c) the coffee appears too many times in the intro to not have some significance to the plot

HOWEVER, aziraphale most definitely still feels indebted to heaven, to an extent.

i think aziraphale KNEW crowley was going to confess, so he said all that shit about heaven being good and hell being inherently evil to egg crowley on into leaving and not confessing, like he did in s2ep1

however, crowley does confess anyway and basically begs him to stay, at which point aziraphale kinda sort of loses it and begs him to stay since maybe the Metatron (and muriel lmao) are watching and the timing is wrong.

i think something goes on during the "no nightingales" line that we don't see. because like. the clock. it's audibly ticking. why's it doing that. sure there's no nightingales, but there is time.

neil says it wasnt anything but HE'S ALSO A LYING LIAR WHO LIES WHY DOES EVERYONE TAKE HIS WORDS AS GOSPEL?? the set design (and sound design) MATTERS especially in good omens, i mean they set david tennant on fire and burnt down the bookshop for realsies.

furthermore between their conversations and the kiss seemingly fifteen minutes seem to have passed. not exactly something you forget to change, and why even use a seemingly functional clock ???

anyways after the kiss, aziraphale eggs crowley on some more with the 'I fOrGiVe yOu' but also literally tries to go back to crowley. whoops the metatron is here now. and he's on the elevator to heaven and he can't turn back now, because both of them would be in danger then.

he tried to get crowley to NOT do a ''oh but saving me makes him so happy'' and we're yet to see if he was successful or not (he was most definitely not)

the split screen at the end is tricky. could imply a body swap. could just be paralleling the first time we see them together in s2. i'm not sure.

either way, i'm glad at least they both know their love is REQUITED. also neil is an evil evil person (/pos) for "hold that thought" "you can't leave this bookshop" "nothing lasts forever" "no nightingales" "you idiot we could've been us" *kiss* "i forgive you" "don't bother" "no come back" "and a nightingale sang in berkeley squ-" BACK TO BACK THAT SCENE IS LIKE GETTING STABBED REPEATEDLY AND THEN THROWN OFF A CLIFF

jhdbf sorry for my insane rambling i think good omens mightve genuinely fried my brain if any of this makes no sense.

so like what do you think??

hi sorry if im bothering u lmao but what are ur opinions on ofmd2 so far?? also what do u think will happen in ep8?? ik i already asked u a couple weeks ago but sm stuff happened in the season after that + i'm procrastinating a bunch of work i have to do:)

don’t worry youre not a bother! i love talking about shows i like so feel free to ask anytime :) plus this is an excuse for me to procrastinate as well lmaooo

i’m really enjoying this season, to see a show be so unabashedly and explicitly be queer, i ESPECIALLY loved calypso’s birthday for the izzy development and the drag and STEDE KILLING NEDLOW FOR INSULTING ED??? and seeing stede slam ed onto the wall is giving me MAJOR good omens s3 visions (leave it to me to make everything about good omens but…. aziraphale slamming crowley into a wall?? telling him to stop being so passive aggressive and then subtly asking if he can go for the kiss?? and then he does?? i see it so clearly)

AND ZHENG AND OLU !!!! episode 8 was great and seeing stede really be happy as a pirate in his infamy was great, but ngl i saw the miscommunication conflict coming a mile away (again, good omens has taught me well) though i do not doubt that they will be together by the end of the season. curious to see how they will wrap it all in only one episode though, i do think they’re aiming for a third season.

i love love love love the speech anachronisms they’re going for this season, it’s artistic liberty done right. usually people try to hide or mask the more inaccurate parts of their works, so seeing a show embrace them is so fun and it works SO WELL (i did i for the lolz + izzy singing a 1940s song are my favourites)

in any case, pretending ofmd is good omens au is my coping mechanism. i swear i’m still sane. what do you think?

[ddarker-dreams]

Hey lock, im kinda curious. A lot of the writers i see usually tend to stick to write to one 0ov(?). I noticed that the works you've written are mostly in the reader's perspective(?) but sometimes you do write it from the character's side. I was wondering what makes you decide to write from either the reader or the character's perspective. Uh, my brain is a bit fried rn so I'm not sure if my ask made any sense. Sorry for that. Just ignore it if you're too confused about it.

i mostly like to stick from the reader's perspective, since i feel that imparts the most anxiety/uncertainty in the case of it being a yandere story. you're working off limited information, unable to see the greater picture, just like the story's MC. this puts you in a position where you're trying to piece together what's going on. how much does the yan know? what are their intentions? what does this mean for the MC? those are the things i want you to be worrying over >: )

as for when i decide to write from another character's perspective, that normally comes when there is information i find interesting that the reader wouldn't have anyway of knowing. for example, if you're knocked out cold, you won't really know what the yan is up to. if the yan is in a mindset that's hard to fully show from just their words/body language, i think having their perspective is helpful too.

if i'm being honest . dipping into another POV during the story isn't the best thing to do, so i try avoiding it, but sometimes i'm just feeling self-indulgent and let it happen rhtjgkmelf it's not a good habit of mine though...

[killemwithkawaii]

L.S.S.: Alright, distraction time.

Mitch(3): I got my bucket and I'm ready ta gooo~

Mitch(3): Sugar Mommy Meadow, comin through once again~

L.S.S.: Yeah, between the two of us not feeling well, we really needed these….

Mitch(3): And at the rate we’re goin, we might need some more… ‘specially once we’re over the hump and back ta humpinnn~ [laughing]

L.S.S.: Ugh… how about we wait to plan for that once neither of us have involuntarily expelled any fluids for at least 24 hours.

Mitch(3): That sounds fair… it’s gonna be a while, ain’t it….

L.S.S.: Yup…. damn, I’m just feeling worse and worse today….

Mitch(3): Yeah, you’re lookin’ kinda… puffy…?

L.S.S.: I’m definitely bloated. And stiff… like, really stiff… that shower didn’t help me relax at all…

Mitch(3): Maybe you weren’t in there long enough? You still… kinda smell…

L.S.S.: Thanks.

Mitch(3): Uh, no, I… sorry, I shouldn’t pick on you when you’re sick… Uh, yeah, stomach and muscle stuff’ll happen when you detox. I’m feeling it, too... Want me to see if these fingers can work some non-sexual magic? I’ll rub your back if you rub mine.

L.S.S.: Worth a shot... Thanks, Mitchie.

L.S.S.: Thanks Meadow, but neither of us have had much of an appetite today… the yogurt might be okay, though.

Mitch(3): I dunno Sal, I think some a this stuff might have sat out for too long… something smells fuckin’ rank. It might be the fish… [sniffing] [gagging]

L.S.S.: Wait, I thought you’d lost your sense of smell?

Mitch(3): Yeah, me, too....

L.S.S.: ...[sniffing] Ooof, yeah, I think this might have turned… better toss it, just to be safe.

Mitch(3): Yeah, I do not want to add food poisoning on top a the rest of this….

L.S.S.: Hurray for following food safety protocols~

Mitch(3): Huh…?

L.S.S.: You know, like, the rules for handling and preparing food at restaurants and stuff…?

Mitch(3): …Sure, yeah, whatever, just throw that shit out before I start dry-heaving again, please…

L.S.S.: Well, you did ask nicely… [chucks the sushi out the front door]

L.S.S.: …god, I did not want that image of Kenneth Phelps back in my brain…

Mitch(3): Wait, wait, you two are talkin about The Big Dog…? [laughing] [laughing] Jesus, he’d tan your fuckin’ hide for sayin shit like that about him…. [laughing] I ain’t about to talk shit about the hand that feeds, Mama. His weird-ass kinks are his business. As long as I get paid, he can hump all the bibles he wants. Hell, I’d help him find the best passages to jerk it to… 

L.S.S.: Wait, I thought Addison was ‘The Big Dog’…?

Mitch(3): Pssh, nah. How could Addi supervise while he’s all cooped up in his apartment? He cooks the Addison Special and supplies, but Phelps is the one that pulls the strings and runs the show.

L.S.S.: That… makes perfect sense….

[sigh] Don’t do drugs, kids. They make you stupid.

Mitch(3): So you finally admit you’re fried, Fisher...?

L.S.S.: Probably a little… might be why that smell is lingering…

Mitch(3): Could be….

Mitch(3): What does she mean?

L.S.S.: There have been a few times where objects have gotten caught up in the glitch and appear at random, like this laptop. I didn’t have it until a few days ago, right?

Mitch(3): Right…

L.S.S.: Yeah, this is the sixth Mitchies. Somehow, it’s followed me through the last couple glitches. Then, a painting and a bunch of knives and forks appeared, and now, the hooks.

Mitch(3): Sooo… what does that mean?

L.S.S.: I don't know, it… it seems like they keep showing up just before-...

…..

Mitch(3): ‘Before’...?

L.S.S.: … Before we die again.

….

Mitch(3): …..

L.S.S.: But, uh, neither of us are dead, sooo it could just be a coincidence! Haha, yeah… [clears his throat] I’m not worried about it…

Mitch(3): Oh yeah, you look so chill…

L.S.S.: … I think I might feel better if we got rid of them…

Mitch(3): Ya’know, me too? We don’t need them ta have fun in the tub, anyway…

L.S.S.: Yeah, no. You got a screwdriver around here?

Mitch(3): I think so… somewhere…

L.S.S.: The search begins…

L.S.S.: Yeah, I was a little afraid I'd fall back into old habits, too... But I know better now. One or two drinks is enough for me. I'm in control, and I'm gonna stay in control, just like I promised.

Mitch(3): That's him, [mocking] Sober Sally...

L.S.S.: Mostly-Sober Sally.

Mitch(3): Same dif....

L.S.S.: I know that the first and second Mitchie both had dreams about their deaths because they told me they did, they just didn't bring it up to me until I got into detail about it... It was an educated guess that this Mitchie had one, too, though.

Mitch(3): That was a guess?

L.S.S.: Yup. I'm starting to see some patterns after the last couple weeks, and that's one of them. Three for Three...

Mitch(3): Is that what your whole deal about not touching the door was about, then?

L.S.S.: Yeah, but, neither of us died the day after you did that, so I could be wrong about that one... the door-to-bed loop is still definitely a thing, though.

Mitch(3): Yeah, that is... really freaky...

Sooo... does that mean we're gonna be okay, then...?

L.S.S.: Hopefully. We just have to wait and see, I guess...

Mitch(3): That's comforting.

L.S.S.: I know, right?

Mitch(3): ....

L.S.S.: .....

Uh... C'mon, let's go see if we can track down that screwdriver...

[ofbardsandmonsters]

Thank you @riotfalling​ for requesting I tackle this prompt and making it Winteriron!! You can also find it here on AO3!

**

Tony Stark has never been one to back down when there’s something he wants. Toys, sweets, attention, grades, cars, employees.

Lovers.

And the former Hydra assassin whose lips he now knows the taste of thanks to a split second decision fueled by a lack of sleep and coffee jitters three nights ago is no exception.

They’d been growing closer for months. Now, Bucky is more likely to be found lounging on the workshop couch with a book in his hand than spending any time with Steve. And Tony had been so sure that the big brunette had been giving him the same looks Tony had been throwing his way for the last several weeks. In fact, despite what some might consider evidence to the contrary, he’s still confident that he wasn’t wrong.

But that doesn’t leave him any less confused as to why Bucky’s been completely avoiding him since their kiss. A kiss that the other man had seemed just as enthusiastic about in the moment. He had looked just as affected before he gently encouraged Tony to finally get some much needed sleep. And Tony knows he hadn’t been imagining the little smile on the other man’s face as he walked away.

Which is why the fact that there’s been no trace of Bucky anywhere for three whole days makes no sense.

FRIDAY has been no help. His youngest child clearly has an even bigger soft spot for their favorite super soldier than her father does because she’s flat out refused to help him get the drop on Bucky. Tony’s not even sure that she isn’t helping Bucky by alerting him any time Tony’s headed his way.

A few years ago, Tony probably would have given up after day one and gone to hide in the shop to nurse his wounded pride. But he likes to think he’s grown past most of those insecurities. And he wants this. He knows they could be so good together. So he enlists the help of the one person that he knows is more invested in Bucky’s happiness and well being than anyone else.

He goes to Steve.

~~

By the time Tony’s done giving Steve the rundown, the blonde is groaning dramatically, one big hand thrown over his eyes.

“Damnit, Buck.”

Tony chuckles, bare heels drumming against the lower cabinets of the counter he’s perched on in Steve’s kitchen. Sometimes, Steve reminds him so much of Rhodey it’s a little spooky. He knows he’s seen the same look of exasperation on his own best friend’s face numerous times throughout their long standing friendship.

“Tony, I promise, you were not reading anything wrong. Bucky never shuts up about you. It’s kinda gross, actually.”

That makes Tony laugh harder, and he gratefully accepts the mug of coffee Steve presses into his hands. It’s made up exactly how he likes, enough cream to turn it a soft caramel color and exactly zero sugar, because Rhodey may be his best friend but Steve is a very close second and he knows Tony almost as well.

“I may have acted in a sleep deprived state, but even my less than functional brain wouldn’t have gone for it if I wasn’t absolutely sure it would be welcomed. I thought we would talk about it in the morning, but I can’t pin him down. So I’m… kind of at a loss.”

Steve drums his fingers on the counter next to Tony’s leg, a thoughtful expression on his face.

“I can help you corner him, but it’s not gonna be easy to convince him. Buck’s still… vulnerable, in places. There’s still so many things he thinks he’s not worthy of, that he doesn’t deserve, because of what Hydra made him do.”

That’s a mindset that Tony’s all too familiar with. It took a long time and a lot of reassurance from the people closest to him before he stopped holding himself to the sins of his past. He knows Bucky’s come a long way from when Steve first brought him home, but demons that size don’t let go easily.

“Steve, you get me in a room with him and keep him from running away, and I’ll do all the rest. And FRI, baby girl, daddy loves you but if you so much as hint to Bucky that Steve’s conspiring against him, I will recode you to run nothing but refrigerators. Are we clear?”

There’s no response for a moment, but Tony’s content to wait the AI out. Luckily, he doesn’t have to wait long.

“Yes, boss.”

Tony snorts, recognizing the petulant tone that he definitely did not program into her. Turning back to Steve, his face settles into a more serious expression.

“Bucky’s… special. He’s important to me. I’m not gonna give up easy.”

Steve smiles at his admission, and he wraps Tony in a hug.

“I know, Shellhead. There’s nobody I trust with him more than you.”

~~

Three hours later, Tony’s sitting amongst the plants in Bruce’s rooftop garden. It’s not really a strange place for him to be, honestly. The garden is calming, and he’s joined Bruce for sunrise yoga (on the mornings Tony hasn’t actually been to sleep yet by the time the sun is coming up) up here a number of times. Steve is standing at the railing overlooking the city when the elevator tings. Tony tenses, nerves and anticipation making his palms sweat, but he doesn’t move. It takes effort, but even when Bucky appears, he manages to push down the instant reaction to stand up and demand answers.

“Hey Stevie, what did you—”

“Sit down, Buck.”

The brunette looks confused, and a little worried, but he does as he’s told and takes a seat in one of the loungers scattered around the space.

“What’s this about, Steve? Is… everything ok?”

Steve sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose before turning frustrated blue eyes on his best friend.

“It’s about Tony, Buck. What the hell are you doing?”

Bucky shrinks back, shoulders rounding as he drops his gaze to his feet.

“Look, Steve—”

“Nope. No. Don’t even start trying to give me some bullshit answer. I know you. I know when you’re sweet on someone. I’ve seen that look in your eyes. You want Tony, and by his own admission, he wants you too. He’s a good person, my best friend in the world other than you. And I want my two best friends to be happy. So what gives?”

“I know , Steve. God, you think I don’t realize exactly how perfect Tony is?” Bucky sighs, rubbing both hands over his face aggressively before looking up at Steve. “That’s exactly why I can’t.”

“That’s bullshit.”

Bucky’s head snaps up, turning to look at where Tony had finally stepped out of hiding. The angry, heartbroken look on the other man’s face makes Bucky flinch.

“Tony…”

The smaller man comes closer, stopping just out of reach and tilting his chin up to look Bucky in the eyes. Neither man notices Steve quietly slipping away.

“It’s bullshit. We’re both so far from perfect, but don’t you think the world’s put us through enough? Don’t you think we deserve to be happy?”

Bucky takes an unconscious step forward, one hand reaching out towards Tony. Even as he tries to hold himself back, he can’t fight the desire to comfort and soothe the other man.

“Tony, of course you deserve to be happy. I just… I'm—I’m sorry. I’m not who you need.”

“But you’re who I want. Isn’t that enough?”

He doesn’t know if it’s Tony’s words or the way his pretty brown eyes turn liquid with the gathering tears, but something in Bucky breaks and there’s no stopping him from closing the distance between them and wrapping the other brunette up in his arms. Tony’s hands come up to fist in the back of his shirt, holding on tight. His next words are muffled by the fabric, but Bucky’s enhanced hearing makes them easy to pick up.

“Don’t you want me too?”

Bucky’s hands move to cup Tony’s cheeks, tilting his face up so their eyes meet. His thumbs brush under Tony’s eyes to catch the tears that have slipped out.

“I’ve never wanted anything or anyone more.”

Tony’s face breaks out into a delighted smile, and he stretches up to press their lips together in a soft kiss. When he tries to pull away, Bucky chases after him, deepening the kiss.

Tony’s already got him beat two to nothing. He’s got a lot of making up to do to even the score.

[freddiefcknmercury]

A Promise(part 2)- Crimson & Clover

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader(Black coded/Genderless)

Word Count: 2.7+

Warnings/Disclaimer: SMUT. ANGST. cursing. mild depression/heart-ache. etc etc. if something needs to be tagged please lemme know.

A/N: LOL I'm back on my bullshit yall. heavy angst/depression from the previous Steve centered storyline so if you haven't read "You really think I didn't know?" I'll do some magic linky links here and at the bottom just in case. Also I'm trying something kinda different with the way I post the fics so feedback is welcome.

ALSO this one comes with a tiny playlist! there are Bolded lyrics throughout if you want to get a deeper sense of where I was emotionally writing this and where reader is as well you can Def give these songs a listen, they are in order of appearance:

Crimson & Clover- Tommy James & The Shondells

Every Time I Breathe- Arlissa

Navy Blue - Hasani

Summary: Bucky takes an extended leave for "work" related reasons and reader slips back into some dark places in his absence...

~*As always, be Nice to me I’m Delicate*~

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

He said he might be gone most of the week. Sam called the day before and all you know is it's something important. He didn't go into detail, just packed a bag and you'd never seen him do that before. But he was also only gone a day or two at a time and never felt the need to tell you about it before now either.

Up until recently you'd tip-toe around each other. Not like you used to with Steve though, worse. Bucky is a lot better at making sure you don't know he's there until it's too late. It felt like you'd never get used to each other, or more likely that you'd never want to. You might've still been secretly hoping that he'd stop caring and go away... after a while you got tired of your own bullshit and realized he's giving off that vibe on purpose. Wordlessly telling you how you should feel about him, not wanting to get too close. You never much liked being told what to do.

It was only about two months before you became a Barnes' expert. You'd sit up at night listening intently for when he'd shower, get in bed, or wake up. He never slept more than five maybe six hours at a time, you'll never understand how he can function like that. You know how he likes his coffee, which angle he holds his cup. How and where he takes off his shoes, how much ice he puts in a drink, the way he likes to cut his toast, and what time he has to do all of it. There's an almost unnerving pattern to him, one that's always been there and you were just unwilling to notice for so long, and you're not sure if he's even aware of it.

You woke up to him already gone. You knew he was leaving but actually being left alone like that unsettled you more than you anticipated, a serious case of Deja vu. You went into your routine like normal, because everything still was, but by the fifth day... you stepped into the front room and got that empty feeling. One you hadn't really had since...

It stopped you for a few seconds longer than you liked and a large knot formed in your stomach. You spent the whole day trying to ignore the feeling but it only got worse. Like a hunger pain but much more vague, crawling through each muscle. You'd catch yourself staring at his room, Bucky's room but also... Steve's. It's the first time you let yourself admit to him fully crossing your mind in over a year.

You laid up in bed, trying to count the metaphorical sheep to no avail. Getting up thinking that a snack or a warm drink will stop the restlessness, you pause in the tiny hallway shared by your bedrooms. The low blue light from the moon outside dustily illuminating the space through  a cloudy bathroom window. You stare at the door like any second he's going to ask what you're doing up so late and you can tell him to mind his own business while pouring two cups of tea.

You just wanted to touch the knob; turn it to make sure it still works- that you're still "allowed in there if you want". But stepping inside was too far, an invasion of Bucky's privacy, and you felt it. But you couldn't help yourself. You needed to know.

They were definitely cut from the same cloth. Sparse furnishings and no decorations, save a few very small trinkets he'd held onto from who knows where. There is exactly one row on his bookshelf filled with composition notebooks that were beat to hell and back. Sticky notes lined the edge of most of the pages, so much so that they easily could've been mistaken for feathers on a quick glance. You dare not touch them. Observing someone with a past that checkered is very different to reading into the things they deem worthy of physically writing down.

Where Steve used to leave small drawings and notes Bucky left half empty ink pens and a few well used pairs of gloves. You saunter to the far corner of the room and caress a worn leather jacket hanging precariously on the lowest peg of a coat rack. Doing a slow sweep of the space something in the otherwise barren closet catches your eye. The knot in your stomach that had almost disappeared was back and it brought friends. Your shirt. His shirt. The big one that said BROOKLYN across the front, what you didn't know was your "going away gift." The one you balled up and shoved in the top corner of his closet, at the time hoping you'd never look at it again. You're amazed that it's still here, that Bucky hadn't tossed it out or tried to give it back to you when he moved in.

So you put it on. You're still not sure why but you needed to wear it. To feel it drape over your skin, enveloping you in warmth and that beautiful clean familiar scent you... loved once. It sent a shiver down your spine. The knots in your stomach were gone but now there's one in your throat. You can feel the tears seated right behind your eyes. You sit on the bed holding your face pleading with the water to stay put but it's too late. You miss him. You hate to admit it, but it's true and it always has been. You're angry and you should be, you loved him- you thought he might've loved you. Pulling the hem of the shirt up you wipe the tears off your face and fall into a pillow, trying to calm yourself out of your rage unintentionally drifting into sleep.

*****************************************************

You wake up to the sound of music in the kitchen.

...Ah, now I don't hardly know her, but I think I could love her...

You sit up quickly checking your phone: 11:34am. You'd fallen asleep in Bucky's room, in his bed. A blanket had been placed over you and a short scan of the room returned a brown leather duffel bag and set of black boots that weren't present last night. He'd come back early this morning and found you here. You can feel your heart fall straight out of your ass, the void that was left being filled with pure embarrassment. Is he angry? He did tuck you in...

As slowly and quietly as possible you make your way towards the door, poking your head out just enough to assess the situation. You can see his back in the kitchen, he's hovering over the sink. You notice the couch, the spare blanket and pillow from the bathroom closet folded neatly on one of the arm rests, he had to sleep there. The void gets deeper. You pull the door open just enough to slip out of and there's a quiet creak. Steve never did fix that, and you just figured out why.

Bucky didn't turn around but definitely noticed. He steps to the side, now in front of the stove and you here something crack and sizzle. You're not sure what to do here. You can try to apologies and explain but there's no un-embarrassing way out of this one. You fold your arms over your stomach trying to hold all your very delicate pieces together while you attempt to speak up. Finally reaching the bar and fully prepared to say good morning when he quickly sets a hot bowl down in front of you. White rice and a fried egg- runny yolk. You'd make it for breakfast when you'd get up early or couldn't sleep, a friend from school put you on to it. Looks like he's been studying you too. You make eye contact but, just briefly. From what little of the expression you get on his face nothing indicates that he's mad. But he hasn't said anything to the contrary either.

How was your trip?  Dangerous I bet-sorry you couldn't come home and sleep in your own goddamn bed! Oh?! AND you made me breakfast!

You feel like a crazy person.

"Comfy last night?"

He's pouring himself some coffee, not yet turning your way. There's no hostility in his voice.

You chuckle nervously.

"Yeah.. sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it."

He sets a small glass of juice down in front of you. Heavy eye contact this time, but his expression is soft. He didn't ask for an explanation and you really didn't want to give him one. But you still feel guilt looming over you. You take the glass in both hands and nurse it.

He nods at you with a squint, taking a big sip of coffee.

"If I knew that was yours I would've given it back."

The shirt. You forgot you actually put it on. You hold your breath stroking the fabric gently. Contemplating your next words.

"It's not- well, not really."

He raises an eyebrow.

"It was a gift, so I guess it does belong to me..."

Glancing back down at it you can see him realize it says "Brooklyn." His expression changes to a knowing one and it reads like regret but he quickly tries to box it back up for you. This is a new move for him.

There's a much longer pause in conversation than either of you would like before he shifts his weight awkwardly.

"Sorry."

You push glass, now empty back across the bar towards him.

"Don't worry about it-"

You swivel in your seat quickly, taking your bowl and getting up to leave. He steps out from the kitchen after you.

"Thanks for breakfast."

The tears had been welling up and started to pour over as you left. You're still in no state to pretend to be a functioning person right now. Trying to save him from your ugly cry face by escaping but he grabs your shoulder gently suggesting you backwards.

You cover your mouth to hush a sob. You can see your chest start heave but there's nothing you can do to stop yourself. He grabs the bowl setting it down carefully, then you feel a warm metal sensation squeezing the back of your neck.

"You don't have to be over it."

He's been back a couple hours and already knows you're still a mess. You scoff, laughing at yourself really.

"What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing."

He whispered back quickly, exasperated, but tender.

You sniffle; pathetic.

"That's not how it feels."

"He fucked up. He just doesn't know it."

He wrapped his arm around your shoulders pulling you into his embrace.

It's nice to feel another person. A real solid human being; you can't remember the last time you hugged someone like this. You turn in his arms to face him. He looks tired. Not just 'had-to-sleep-on-an-old-couch' tired. Emotionally repressed. Maybe he has actually wanted to talk to you. He pulls you into him, it's just a hug  but it almost hurt how sweet this was.

Then a thought came to you, not really sure how, you can't handle more rejection right now; but you kissed him anyway, hard. Like him being gone almost killed you- because it did. He pulls away from you, just a little, reading your face his own expressionless. You search his eyes for any kind of hint as to what's going on inside his mind. You're not ready to admit this was a mistake yet. There's no real way to know how long you stood there like that. You only dare to move after you hear the song change in the background.

Words... thought they just fade away

but hurt... gave them a place to stay

"Do something."

You were sure it was just in your head but it creaked out past your lips in less than a whisper, pleading with him.

He covered your mouth with his, smoothing both hands down your neck to your shoulders gripping them gently, intently. You cling to his waist almost afraid to explore anywhere else, then slowly drag nails along his back. He pulls you back into him, you want to fuse with the warmth radiating off of his body, he bends and you collide onto the floor with a muffled thud. He cradles your head quickly so you don't get hurt but you wouldn't care at this point.

The way you fit into each other is unnerving, like your bodies weren't meant for anybody else. You both scramble to undress him in between breathy wet kisses and he's... magnificent. He pulls off his shirt and you swiftly run fingers from his neck down each arm. The metal one is warm, this surprises you for some reason. You watch as each "muscle" dances at your touch and you catch a small glimpse of something on his face that resembles insecurity... or fear. He shelves it quickly in response to you bucking your hips up to dismiss your underwear.

He buries his face in your neck, warm breaths ghosting your skin. Hooking his hands behind your knees he hoists your legs up around his waist. He bites down gently and you gasp. It's too much. He's everywhere, all at once. The last person to touch you event remotely close to this was-

"...Steve."

It just came out, you almost didn't notice it. Bucky stops, pulling back and away. He scans you, a pitiful, panting mess on the floor. The most vulnerable you've probably ever been and definitely in front of him. He shakes his head slowly once, chest heaving.

"No."

Knots line your stomach once again. He grabs your wrist to hold your arms in place up above your head and presses his forehead against yours.

"Look at me."

You hold eye contact there for a solid minute, you're sure of it. He leans forward delicately dragging teeth against your ear.

"You're gonna keep saying it until you can't forget."

He drops his hips and lines up with your entrance. You feel a thick wash of euphoria from the pressure, throwing your head back as much as possible given the floor. You roll your hips along to his, cradling each other perfectly.

His eyes didn't leave your face until you both feel your legs begin to tremble.

"Oh Bucky."

The only words you can remember.

You feel every stroke hasten and all his muscles tighten each time his name falls from your lips. He pulls your shirt up to your neck looking to spatter kisses and bite marks across your torso. You futilely dig one set of nails into the floor and the other in his shoulder as he hungrily growls into your stomach, cursing, longing for mercy.

"Fuck."

You pull him back up to your face demanding his tongue. You hear the floorboard creek from the pressure of a metal hand, the flesh one surely bruising your hip by now. There's a deep enduring moan from the back of his throat as he finds his release inside you. You gasp at the sensation and you both pant into each other, nothing but a mess on the floor now.

He presses a long, firm kiss into the bridge of your nose then falls gently on his back beside you. You roll your head up to look at his face, whatever it is he's feeling isn't immediately obvious as he stares up at the ceiling. You shift onto your side placing a light, cautious hand on his chest and he glances over at you, reaching to squeeze your thigh reassuringly.

The sky is Navy Blue soon to be baby blue and baby you got nothing but time...

He looks over your face in a deep sigh before retiring his gaze to the ceiling.

"I don't know him... The guy that left you like that."

You watch intently has his jaw clenched, he's never been able to hide that bit very well.

"I don't know what kind of..."

He trails off, clearly upset.

You sigh deeply.

"I was gonna die that night."

He rolls his head back to look at you.

"The day I met him? I had pretty much made up my mind."

You start to fiddle with the hem of your shirt. Almost reminiscent.

"But he found me in the staircase..."

You hate how subtly he did some things. If you weren't lying next to him. There's no way you'd ever be able to tell his breathing had changed.

"Essentially-"

You pick your head up, chin on his sternum.

"He saved my life."

You state matter of factually. You watch his body relax in a short, bitter way.

He rolls his head over just enough to look you in the eyes. You kiss his chest once tenderly before moving to stand up. You extend a hand down for him to grab.

"That isn't good for your back."

"You really think I didn't know?" Part1

[free-boundsoul]

Yeah. Exactly. I wonder if shifters know how connected they seem to people on the outside looking in. Well, when you put it like that, I guess we’re in the same boat, but also poised to help each other!

Well, maybe I have more important things to do than be your own private human dictionary. Have you ever thought of that, Freelancer? Oh, good good good. So I’m not the only one who was skeptical that they died? I’m kinda relieved. I thought I was just grasping at straws.

When you put it like that, maybe it might be more likely than I thought that a cat would come up to me. I do run hot. Plus, maybe I could borrow a few of those treats you offered earlier? Just as, y’know, insurance. And hey, if you go, perhaps another cat will choose you. Does Eren play nice with others?

Hmm. That’s an interesting offer, Freelancer. I guess we could arrange that. Purely for gathering data, of course. Not because it might be fun. You probably snore. Aww, that must’ve seemed magical for you as a kid. Even though it means that you didn’t get a picture to capture the moment, maybe you’re better off not having a smartphone at the time. You got to be in the moment and capture it in your mind’s eye without distractions or pressure or thinking about how you’re going to show it to other people. You were there fully, completely, and now you get to always have that. Barefoot in the snow? Oh hell, Freelancer. The thought is enough to make my toes fall off! You need some self-preservation.

Should we do a matinee or an evening showing? Oh, enemies to lovers can be interesting, but it depends how it’s handled. I like to see some sort of complexity or something right from the get go. If they just both scream and yell and insult each other, then I never want them to end up together. Like, there’s a point of being too mean. Lots of movies use that trope. I always think of /Much Ado About Nothing/ as the OG enemies to lovers.

You do that thing with your eyebrow, raise it up and crinkle it, when you lie. A little competition never hurt anyone, in my opinion at least. Crispiness can be an asset sometimes. Like with sweet potato fries. Those are my favorite! I’ll make sure not to serve any popcorn. Good to know. What’s your take on caramel corn? I know you’ve got quite the sweet tooth.

Maybe if it’s that cold, I could actually hold the snow in my hands without instantly melting it. I remember one winter, just after my powers manifested, I wanted to make a snowman and couldn’t. I almost, almost cried! But, then my mom showed me how to control my fire so that I melted the snow a little bit into ice and we made an ice sculpture that looked like a snowman. She’s so creative. But when it’s a dry heat, it’s not that bad! I promise!

-Damien

I was just kidding, Damien. It was a pretty poor joke, I'll admit, I'm sorry. I really don't think of you as a dictionary, even though you usually teach me new words. But you're definitely not grasping at straws. I mean, they're an earth elemental, and there was earth beneath them. Hux is always digging holes just for fun, imagine how fast he could be if he had to do it in a situation like that.

I have plenty of treats, for insurance reasons of course, though I doubt that you'll need them. Haha, Eren loves other cats, though he's a bit...persistent, so most other cats can't stand him. He just wants to be friends.

Oh, I definitely snore.... funny story, when I was a kid I used to deny that I snored. I had a dream where every so often whenever I tried to speak, I'd let out a snore... and well, I was convinced that I snored after that. So, if I get too loud, just wake me up or put a pillow over my face or something. That's a really sweet way of thinking, Damien, and you're right! Haha, I still go outside barefoot in the snow to take out the trash or get the mail or stuff. I haven't lost any toes yet.

Maybe evening if that's okay? I have to agree, if they're just yelling and hating each other, it makes no sense. I haven't seen that before, maybe that's another movie we should watch together?

I do? I had no idea. I don't usually lie so I guess I don't really think about the kinds of tells I have. Oh, I love sweet potato fries! They're so much better than regular ones. I love caramel corn when it's fresh, when the caramel is softer and not so hard. My grandma used to make caramel puffcorn balls around Christmas. They were such a mess. Have you ever had white chocolate covered puffcorn? It's pretty addictive.

That sounds like so much fun! And pretty, have you ever tried to use food coloring to make the ice different colors? We should make a snowman together! Have you ever built a fort out of the snow, the big piles that are made by the plows? When I was a kid we used to dig out tunnels if we got a lot of snow. And oh sure, I'll believe you if I ever see that. The summers I've dealt with are always so muggy.

[angelordemonmattersnot]

@glazdon

Acts of affection ( shippy/ fluff edition )

💗 - our muses are wrestling playfully and yours suddenly kisses mine

🍟 - your muse steals a fry from mine and says “You’re cute when you’re mad.”

🎊 - my muse is pregnant and yours is ecstatic upon hearing the good news

----

She was... Well a little emotional about her fries being eaten by the love of her life. Well scratch that honestly... When Roland brought up that she was cute when she was mad, Sapphire burst out into tears. She just couldn't help it. Like literally couldn't. After going through the last few days of being woken up with the urge to empty her stomach through the day before settling finally by the time dinner time began to roll around. She was a little emotional about her food.

At first she thought it was some bug that she caught. After all it was part of her job to help those in need, and sometimes you couldn't help that those people were sick. But after day three, and concerned looks her way, the red head set herself up for a doctor's appointment. How wrong she was. A stomach bug didn't do this. No.. not with the news the doctor delivered to her. How could such simple, but so exstordernarily life changing news bring so much joy?

A baby.

They had been married at this point for perhaps... A little over six months? Having settled into a place that was a little larger than the last, the spare room they had wasn't going to be spare for much longer. But that was going to be fine. It was honestly the matter of sharing said news with her husband.

Which wrapped everything back to her being grumpy and distraught about the loss of her fries. Correction, one fry.

Cheeks puffed out as blue eyes narrowed in contempt. "Did you really have to take that? I need to eat you know." Grumbling at Roland, her hands reached to her plate as she pulled it a little closer. Bringing a hand up, as if to create a barrier between him and her food. Was this typical? Perhaps...but the fact that her eyes had become glossy, a sign of tears, was not.

"It's just a fry... You know we could cook more to replace the one I ate." Roland's expression changed from being humored to a bit more concerned for the fact that Sapphire was crying over the fry. The unusual behavior only made him more concerned. It usually ended with the two having a bit of fun after dinner. Then again, a bit more recently her mood swings had been a little more frequent and a bit harsher than usual. It made him worry there was something more going on that needed to be checked on by the doctor. Speaking of which, that was on the agenda of questions for his star. But perhaps... It'd be wise to lighten the mood. His focus falling fully back to his love.

"No..."she sniffled for a moment as teary blue eyes dropped to the floor. "It's just been a long day already...." She tried offering a small smile as Sapph looked up at her husband, an apology reflecting in her expression while her hands moved to clear her face of moisture. She really needed to pull herself together.

Roland blinked as his gaze went from his wife to the clock for a moment. The time changing to 11:17 in the morning. "Well.. that's saying something considering it isn't even noon yet.." His gaze turned back to the small woman before him, contemplating something. Yes.. now would be a good time to lighten things up. A slow smile stretched across his lips as Roland stood slowly from his chair.

Blue eyes followed his movements as a slim brow arched on Sapphire's forehead. Tears clearly stopping as curiosity filled the void. That expression spelled trouble. It did every single time. Well good trouble. Despite that, she waited with baited breath to see what he was up to. After all, he was very distracting to look at. Him with his rediculous handsome face, toned addictive body and the sweetest damned personality she ever had the chance to drown in. So lost was she on following his movement, she had missed the fact that he was at her side, leaning down, and quite humored with her sudden realization of just how close he had gotten.

Startled, a odd sound of a squeal mixed a strangled gurgle of excitement, the small woman practically fell sideways out of the dining room chair before catching herself in a hurry to skitter off to the living room. The bark of laughter echoed behind her for a moment as short legs carried her through the living room and towards the hall for the bedrooms. Despite the bout of sadness she had over the stupid fry, the fact that it had faded quickly was a relief. Especially as Sapph practically was snickering now as she attempted to flee.

Key word : attempted

Roland was just as fast out of suit, and just as light on his feet too. It didn't take much to cross the living room and into the hall once he stopped laughing over that adorable reaction. A predatory grin along his face as he reached out both hands, fingers grazing the sides of Sapphire's waist, the gap closing between the two. The hunter catching his prey in a final burst of energy.

The bought of laughter from the red head was her down fall as strong arms wrapped around her frame, lifting her easily into the air for a moment before being pulled against a strong warm frame. Hot breath tickled her ear as Roland joined her in laughing for the moment.

"Gotcha!" Long arms shifted the smaller woman in his arms to keep her comfortable against him while being held. Minor fussing coming from the other was normal. Typically cursing his long legs to catch up to her. Crossing into their bedroom, and plopping down onto the bed. Roland nuzzled his nose into curly red locks before placing a gentle kiss atop her head. " Love you my Star."

Arms loosened as if following a routine to allow Sapph to shift in a more comfortable position. All fussing ended once she settled in his lap happily, her attention turning to him once again. "Love you too my Leo." Gently tugging the front of his shirt, she leaned in kissing him gently.

Settling against one another, it was easy to relax and enjoy being in each other's company. Allowing the days stress, even if it was early in the day, to melt away. They were each others best remedy to a bad day after all.

After some time, Sapphire spoke up as she gazed at her husband. "You know.. I am sorry that I reacted like that. I wasn't trying to freak out over a little fry." Warmth spread through her as Roland's forehead settled gently against hers. Waiting for her to finish speaking before joining in. "I went to the doctor this mornin, and she kinda gave a bit of news I guess I wasn't quite prepared to hear. But it... It really does explain so much."

"Oh? And whats that?" He tried to remain calm. Normally Sapph was pretty straight forward with him. But she fidgeted in his lap while she beat around the bush so's to say. Which meant this was bigger than some virus he thought she might have contracted.

"Well..." She took a breath in, cheeks puffing out only slightly before letting it out in a quick release. Her cheeks colored a little while giving him a reassuring smile. "It's not death or anything like that.. but it will take bout nine months or so to let it pass..and another eighteen years before its all said and done." Seeing him arch a brow at her description almost made her laugh. "Oh come on haha... Its a baby... I'm pregnant Roland!" She felt giddy finally being able to tell him without her freaking out herself.

Those words sunk in heavy and quickly as his eyes widened. She was... It made sense the past few days.. even the past few weeks."Seriously?!" A swell of pride and joy spread through his chest and to the rest of his body as he pulled Sapphire in for a passion filled kiss. Any of her giggles died in her throat as she responded in kind. Pulling back for some air, laughter bubbled out. Excitement clear while holding his wife close. Her own cheerful giggles melded with his. "Holy shit.. haha that's.. that's some of the best news I've heard..." Planting a few small kisses along her face, he couldn't contain the smile that spread across his face. "God.. I was worried you were sick... Like really sick." What the hell would he do without his Star by his side? He'd already done so much to make sure she was safe. Enveloping her into his arms, held flush against him, he peppered her face with small kisses once more.

"No... I would have told you well before leaving the doctors if that were the case." A smile cracked across her face. One eye shut as she focused on her husband. All those little kisses filled her with so much love for this man. It was impossible for her to not figure out how to move closer, to soak up his affection in every way possible. "Now you're really stuck with me." Laughing, she kissed just along his jaw the first chance she got.

"Oh no...Guess I'll just have to cope with that by making sure we have the best life possible." Roland chuckled lightly.

"God I love you so much..."

"Love you too my Star."

[emospritelet]

Never did this before, so hope I'm doing it right...DH Prompt 55: “ Shut up and kiss me already. ”

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Part 8] [Part 9] [Part 10] [Part 11] [Part 12] [Part 13] [Part 14] [Part 15] [Part 16] [Part 17] [Part 18] [Part 19] [Part 20] [Part 21] [Part 22] [Part 23] [Part 24] [Part 25] [Part 26] [Part 27] [Part 28] [Part 29] [Part 30] [Part 31]

Prompts all come from this list.

AO3 link

Dinner at Granny’s was an enjoyable affair; Neal and Emma proclaimed the ribs to be among the best they’d eaten, and Henry ate his burger, half of Belle’s fries and somehow still had room for apple pie.  Once the plates had been cleared and coffees poured, Gideon dozed on his father’s lap while Henry flicked through his book, explaining some of the stories within to Gold.

“Wait, so Red Riding Hood is the wolf in this?” said Gold.  “A singular interpretation.”

“Yeah, and she’s so cool!” said Henry enthusiastically.  “She helps Snow White to hide from the Evil Queen!”

“Wasn’t it always the Huntsman who helped Snow White?”

“Oh, he does, but the Queen found out and took his heart,” said Henry.  “So now he has to do whatever she says. He was raised by wolves, and he loves the forest, but she keeps him trapped in the castle.”

“Well,” said Gold.  “She sounds very unpleasant.”

“Yeah,” agreed Henry.  “But I kinda feel sorry for her.  It’s like she thinks that destroying happy endings for everyone will make her happy, but it only makes her miserable.”

“I suspect there’s a moral in there somewhere,” remarked Gold, glancing at Belle.

“Yes,” she said firmly.  “Let yourself be happy, and don’t make decisions for other people.”

She smirked at him, and he sent her a tiny grin, kissing the top of Gideon’s head.

Gold had offered to cook dinner the next night, and so Belle spent her day at the flower shop with Gideon, closing up at four and heading home.  He was already preparing food when she arrived, and Belle lifted her nose and sniffed at the scent of chocolate wafting through the kitchen.

“I made a cake,” he said.  “It’s been awhile since I baked anything.  I enjoyed it.”

The cake was cooling on a wire rack, dark and rich, and she grinned as she went to inhale its scent.

“What are you going to put on it?” she asked.  “I could make some buttercream.”

“I have fresh cream, and some raspberries,” he said.  “There’s a little framboise in the liquor cupboard as well.  Might be nice to pour on the sponge. Henry can have coulis, save the booze for the rest of us.”

Belle spied a glass jar of thick, crimson sauce, and stuck a finger in it, licking off the taste of sweetened fresh raspberries.

“So, that’s dessert sorted,” she remarked.  “Delicious. What about the rest?”

“I thought we’d keep things simple,” he said.  “Pasta?”

“The cheesier the better,” she agreed, and he grinned.

He made macaroni cheese, with garlic bread and a crisp green salad to cut the richness, and by the time Emma, Neal and Henry arrived the pasta was bubbling in the oven, the cheese sauce thick and glistening, golden brown on the top.  There was cold white wine, sharp and fruity on the tongue, and the garlic bread was fragrant, making lips and fingers slick with melted butter.  There was silence for the first ten minutes as everyone ate, but then the conversation started up.  Emma and Neal spoke about places to visit in Boston, and which areas were the best, and the easiest routes to Belle’s university.

“We pulled a few all-nighters in the library, huh Belle?” said Emma, gesturing with her fork.

“Yeah.”  Belle took a sip of wine.  “Not sure I can do that anymore.  Since having Gideon I’ve decided I need to take my sleep where I can get it.”

“I don’t want you studying so hard you make yourself ill,” said Gold, and she shook her head, running a hand over his thigh.

“It was only around exam time,” she said.  “My study technique improved, so hopefully having a baby won’t mean I’ve forgotten everything I learned.”

“Finals are a bitch,” said Emma, with feeling.  “Can I get another glass of wine?”

“Of course.”

Gold poured her the wine, offering the bottle to Neal, who held out his glass.

“Thanks,” he said.  “This mac and cheese is awesome, by the way.”

“It’s so good,” agreed Henry.  “Why isn’t yours this good, Mom?”

“Gee, thanks,” said Emma, in a flat tone, and Henry grinned at her as he held out his plate for more.

“Your mac and cheese is awesome too, babe,” Neal assured her.

“Well, now you just sound like you have to say that,” she remarked, taking a drink.

“No, I just know what to say to get more of the good stuff,” he said, with a wicked grin.

“That a fact?”  She was smiling at him, her eyes sparkling.  "You always were a smooth talker, Cassidy.“

"Good thing you can read me like a book then, huh?” he said, winking at her.

“I know when I’m being thrown a line, yeah.”

“So are you biting?” he asked, and her grin widened.

“Shut up and kiss me already.”

Neal leaned in to kiss her, eyes crinkling at the corners, and Henry made a gagging motion behind his hand, causing Gold to break into a wide smile as he reached for his wineglass.  He shared a grin with Belle, dark eyes twinkling, and clinked his glass against hers.  The wine was making her pleasantly light-headed, and she could feel herself relaxing with the comfort of good food and good company.  She kept her hand on Gold's thigh, enjoying the firm warmth of him, the closeness, and his eyes softened a little as he glanced at her, that smile still on his face.

Belle got the impression that Gold, the seasoned loner, was enjoying having guests in his house for dinner.  She realised that at the very heart of him was the soul of a person who wanted to care for others, the nurturing side that came out through the preparation of good food and wine, and the pleasure it gave him to share it.  The harshness of his earlier life, the lack of any kindness or love, had gotten in the way, creating barriers of cold stone, forbidding walls of spiked blackthorn. He had begun to break through that for Gideon, and for her, and for a moment, talking and laughing with her friends around the dinner table, she began to sense what life could be like for him, for their family, when he faced his demons and beat them.  She wondered if he felt it too; his eyes kept flicking to Neal, and to Henry, that tiny crease of puzzlement still between his brows, as though he couldn’t quite fathom how he had ended up there with a kitchen filled with chatter and laughter and the clink of glasses.

Henry had two helpings of the pasta, and after the plates had been cleared Gold handed around dishes of the chocolate cake, layered up with raspberries and cream and with raspberry liqueur soaking into the sponge.

“Dear God, that’s amazing,” said Emma, licking cream from her fork.  “I can see why you want to move in with this guy, Belle.”

“Cooking’s only the second most incredible thing he does with his hands,” said Belle, and giggled as Gold gave her a very level look.

“What’s the first?” asked Henry curiously, and Belle blushed.

“I also clean up afterwards,” said Gold blandly.

“Some nights that’s better than the other thing,” said Emma, and winked at him.

“What other thing?”

“Sleeping,” said Neal, ruffling his hair.  “Which is what you should be doing, buddy. You done with your cake?”

Henry scraped up the last of the cream and raspberry sauce, licking his spoon.

“I wanted to tell Mr Gold the story of Beauty and the Beast,” he said despondently.

“You can tell me next time,” said Gold.  “I have a feeling that story may resonate with me.”

He glanced across at Belle, reaching out to thread his fingers through hers, and she smiled at him, happy and warm and filled with contentment.  This was how their life could be. This was how it would be.

Her head ached a little the next day, the after-effects of too much wine, but she felt surprisingly well-rested, and joined Gold and Gideon in the kitchen for a breakfast of scrambled eggs with bacon and lots of hot tea.

“I think I’ll go to the shop today,” said Gold, hands cradling his cup.  “I want to go through the china inventory and polish the silver.”

“Not the most exciting job,” she remarked.  “You sure you don’t want to just chill out here with us?”

His mouth flattened a little, his fingers shifting restlessly on the white china.

“I’m feeling - I don’t know,” he mused.  “Agitated isn’t quite the right word. I feel the need to do something.  Something that won’t take too much brain power.”

“You could always do me,” she suggested innocently, and he grinned.

“Oh, later, most definitely.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

He was still grinning, his eyes twinkling, and she felt her belly lurch.

“How about Gid and I walk into town with you?” she said.  “I could pick us up some coffee from Granny’s, bring it back to the shop.”

“Sounds good.”

The day was pleasant, fat white clouds spreading across the blue of the sky, and Belle inhaled deeply as they walked along, Gold with one hand resting at the small of her back, his other wielding the cane.  The pawn shop was cool and dark, and the stroller’s wheels sounded loud on the wooden floor as she pushed it into the back room. Gold bent to unfasten Gideon’s straps, and she went back through to the shop to open the blinds, letting thin shafts of sunlight fan out across the floor.  She flipped the sign to Open, grinning to herself as she remembered Emma and Neal’s interruption.  Perhaps she could turn the lock at some point later that day and finish what she had started.

Gideon was seated on the floor when she went through to the back, solid plastic shapes in a variety of bright colours scattered on the rug in front of him. Gold had set down a hollow ball with holes to take the shapes, but Gideon was ignoring it.

“Seems more interested in chewing them than putting them through the holes,” he remarked, and Belle grinned.

“He’ll get there.”

“Undoubtedly.”

He was holding something, an old toy rabbit with a faded blue felt waistcoat, soft brown faux fur with a cream chest and shiny black beads for eyes.  She had seen it on the shelves many times, and had always felt that it looked out of place in amongst the trinkets and china and old books. She had never asked about it before, and he had never seemed to pay it any attention beyond keeping it free of dust, which made her wonder what had changed.

“What’s that?” she asked, and he looked down at the toy rabbit in his hands, as though he couldn’t remember holding it.

“Oh,” he said vaguely.  “It - it belonged to my son.  To Bailey.”

Belle bit her lip, empathy making her want to hug him.

“You kept it all this time?” she asked sadly, and he sent her a wry smile.

“It was his favourite toy,” he said.  “His mother left it behind when she took him.  I used to lie awake at night, wondering if he could sleep without it.  A stupid thing - I’m sure he found another toy to hug.”

“It’s not stupid,” she said gently, and he sighed, turning the rabbit over and over in his hands, brown ears flopping as it moved.

“Can’t bring myself to throw it out,” he said.  “This is all I have left of him, you see. No pictures.  She took those, too.”

“What - what brought this on?” she asked, and he shrugged.

“I’m not sure,” he admitted.  “Perhaps - perhaps meeting Henry.  All that bright enthusiasm, the innocence of youth.  It makes me think of what I’ve missed. Perhaps Bae has his own children now, and I’ll never know them.”

He was looking wistful, his fingers clutching the brown plush body of the rabbit, and Belle took a step closer, running her hands up his back to his shoulders.  Gold let his head roll back with a sigh.

“Well, self-pity doesn’t help,” he said, almost to himself.  “My son barely knew me before he was gone, and it’s likely I’ll never see him again.  I have to accept that.”

He stepped away from her, setting the toy rabbit back on the shelf, cream-padded feet sticking out in front of it and ears flopping over its black-bead eyes.  His hand tightened over the cane as he stepped back, and Belle ran a hand over his arm, wanting to touch him, to send him reassurance.

“Did you speak to Dr Hopper?” she asked, and he turned to her, one brow lifting with a hint of surprise.

“Actually, yes,” he said.  “I have an initial appointment with him next week.”

“Maybe he can help,” she said, and he shrugged.

“It has to be better than doing nothing, doesn’t it?” he said, and slid an arm around her, pulling her a little closer.  “I also spoke to my lawyer. She wants us to go to Boston, to go through the paperwork for Gideon. I thought we might look at some properties while we’re there, if you like.”

Belle nodded, twining her arms around his neck.

“I’m looking forward to making a home with you,” she said, a little shyly, and he smiled, kissing her forehead.

“You don’t need to do anything,” he said softly.  “Home is wherever you and Gideon are. It’ll be wonderful whether it’s here or in Boston.”

She kissed him, rising up on her toes before settling back, a wide smile on her face.

“I’m glad you like Neal and Emma and Henry,” she said.  “When we move to Boston I expect we’ll have them over for dinner a lot.”

“Yes,” he said.  “Yes, I’d like that.  I’m glad you’ve made such good friends.”

Belle hesitated, unsure whether to voice the stray thought that had been creeping around in her mind since the previous night.  Curiosity won out.

“You - you seemed to watch Neal a lot,” she ventured.  “Like - like you were puzzled by something.”

Gold glanced at her, a smile twisting his mouth a little, and he stepped out of her arms, grounding the cane.

“You noticed,” he said dryly.  “Not much gets past you, does it?”

“Oh, I wouldn’t say that,” she said.  “But since you just admitted it, what was up?”

He didn’t answer for a moment, his jaw working a little, eyes flicking to the floor and back up.

“It’s the strangest thing,” he said slowly.  “It’s - it’s almost as though we’ve met before.  I’m certain that we haven’t, at least not to my knowledge, but it’s like there’s this thought just - just scratching away at the back of my mind and it won’t stop.”

“What do you think it means?” she asked, and he pulled a face.

“Maybe we have met, and I just don’t remember it,” he said.  “Perhaps he was in the house when I went to serve a tenant with an eviction notice, or perhaps he served me in a bloody restaurant, I don’t know.  What does he do for a living?”

“Accountancy clerk,” said Belle, and Gold shrugged.

“So maybe it was that.  I don’t know. I don’t suppose it matters.”  He leaned in to kiss her forehead again. “Did you say something about coffee?”

“Yeah.”  She smiled up at him.  “I’ll take Gideon and make a run to Granny’s.  We might be able to catch Emma before she goes.”

“Give them my best, if you do,” said Gold.  “And see if Mrs Lucas has any of those excellent ginger cookies, would you?”

“On it.”

The sky had clouded over when she left the shop, the summer day unusually cool and fresh, and Belle walked quickly as she pushed the stroller up the street.  The diner was busy, and she smiled as she saw Neal, Emma and Henry seated at one of the tables, with empty plates in front of them and a guidebook resting on the table top.

“Oh, I’m glad I caught you,” she said, parking the stroller.  “I’m on a coffee run.”

“Well, sit down and have one with us,” said Emma, pulling out the chair next to her.  “Long drive ahead, so it’s caffeine all around. Except Henry.”

“I’m having cocoa with cinnamon,” put in Henry.

“We’ve decided to head up the coast, see some of the country,” added Neal. “Maybe three days or so. Thought we might drop by on the way back, if that’s okay.”

“Great!” said Belle, beaming as she lifted Gideon up.  “That would just about tie in with us travelling to Boston.  We’re going to look for an apartment there.”

“You can stay with us!” said Henry eagerly, and Emma chuckled.

“Not unless they want to sleep three to a bed, kid.”

“Yeah, I think we’ll be getting a hotel,” said Belle, with a grin.  “We can have dinner though, Henry.”

“I wanna take Mr Gold to the aquarium.”

“I’ll tell him,” said Belle, amused, bouncing Gideon on her knee.  “We went for Gideon’s birthday, remember?”

“We went for Dad’s birthday,” corrected Henry, in a dry tone.  “He just pretended it was for Gideon.”

“Yeah, well, only a day in it,” said Neal, shrugging, and tapped Gideon’s nose with a finger, making him giggle. “You almost shared a birthday with your Uncle Neal, kid.  We were looking at double celebrations if you could have just held out for a little longer. Maybe matching T-shirts, or something.”

“There’s more excuses for cake this way,” said Henry, and Belle grinned, smiling up at the waitress as coffee was poured for her.

“Well, when Gideon turns two, we’ll be in Boston,” she said.  “So we can all celebrate together.”

“Are you and Mr Gold gonna get married?” asked Henry suddenly.  “You could have more babies together. I bet Gideon would like a brother.  I’d like a brother.”

Neal and Emma exchanged an amused look.

“Well, I don’t know,” said Belle, trying not to grin.  “We’ll have to see how things go.”

Henry grumbled something under his breath about ‘we’ll see’ meaning ‘never’, and opened up his storybook. Neal picked up his coffee cup.

“He’s a fan of true love,” he remarked.

“It’s sweet,” said Belle, in an undertone.  “And honestly, remembering how I felt just a few short weeks ago - optimism is a good thing.  I want things to work out.”

“Sometimes that’s half the battle,” said Emma, taking a sip of coffee.

“Yeah,” said Belle slowly.  “I don’t think it’s gonna be easy, especially knowing some of the stuff Alex has to work through, but he’s getting therapy for that, and I know he wants to try.  I know he wants to do his best for us, and I need that. I want Gideon to grow up as part of a happy family, which includes his father.”

“At least he’s trying,” agreed Neal.  “More than my mother ever did.”

“What do you remember about your mother?” asked Belle, and Neal wrinkled his nose.

“Dark hair, and pretty, I guess,” he said.  “Kind of intense. I remember the last conversation I had with her, when she left me with Social Services.  She said she wouldn’t be gone long, she just needed a break. Begging me to understand, while I just couldn’t stop crying.  Never saw her again.”

“I’m so sorry,” said Belle sadly, and he shrugged.

“Yeah.  Kind of tried to forget her as I got older,” he said.  “Took every step I could think of to cut her out of my life, to make myself into someone else.”

“Was that hard?” she asked, and he pulled a face.

“Some things were easier to let go of than others,” he said.  “I mean - Bailey Bonny? Not really me, you know?”

Belle blinked.

“Bailey Bonny?” she said curiously, and he sent her a wry smile.

“One benefit of hanging out with the wrong crowd was being able to get a new identity, no questions asked,” he said.  “I changed my name. Became someone else.”

“I didn’t know,” said Belle, surprised.

“Like I said.”  He took another sip of coffee.  “Tried to forget.”

“Right,” she said.  “So, your original surname was Bonny?”

Neal set down his cup, licking his lips.

“Well, my mother’s surname,” he said.  “She used to say she shared the name of a famous pirate - Ann Bonny - and that she called me Bailey after a sailor she met once.  Always did love the sea. Guess I thought it was cool as a little kid. When she left - well, I soon figured I needed my own name.  Milah Bonny was the woman who abandoned me. Didn’t need the constant reminder.”

“Milah.”  Belle’s heart began to thump hard in her chest.  “That’s - an unusual name.”

Neal shrugged, wrinkling his nose.

“I guess.”

“Was she - was she Scottish?”

He shook his head.

“English.  My dad was Scottish, though.  Or so she said.”

“Right.”  Belle’s hands tightened around her cup.  “And - and what do you know about him?”

“Not much,” he said wryly.  “They met in Glasgow. He worked a lot.  Too much, according to her. Never liked to have any fun, always the responsible one.  She made it sound like that was a bad thing. Where I got my brown eyes, too.”

“So - were you born over there, or over here?”

“Oh, I was born in northern England,” he said.  “Newcastle, would you believe? Although from what I can tell we moved around a lot in England and Scotland when I was a baby.  My mother said we came over here when I was like two, so I can’t say I remember anything of the old place. Living in the US is all I’ve ever known.  We were in Florida for awhile, I know that. Always moving, never settled. And then one day it was a trip to Social Services, and she was gone, and I was in the system.”

It was said lightly, as though he didn’t care, but Belle suspected it had affected him deeply.  Emma was chewing her lip, looking troubled, and Belle hesitated before speaking.

“So - you changed your name,” she said.  “And - and you don’t know your dad’s name?  Did you ever try to look for him?”

“Oh, sure!” he said immediately.  “Just as soon as I was old enough to realise what I needed to do and the kinds of questions I needed to ask.  Trouble was, I had no family other than my mother - and she never came back. So there was no one I could ask about my dad, and when I got my birth certificate there was no name on there, so…”  He shrugged. “Nothing. Don’t even know if the guy she told me about was really my dad.”

“Do you remember anything about him?” asked Belle, and he wrinkled his nose.

“Not really,” he admitted.  “Just - really vague sort of stuff.  Like memories of memories, if that makes sense.  Nothing solid. Nothing I could describe, anyway.”

“Right,” she said absently, and Emma drained her cup, setting it down.

“Come on guys, we’d better hit the road.”

Henry closed his book with a thump, and Belle stood up, bouncing Gideon in her arms.  Emma hugged her, and kissed Gideon’s head.

“We’ll call when we’re on the way back,” she said.

“Yeah, we’ll give you warning this time,” added Neal, with a grin.  “See if you can keep things PG in the shop, okay?”

Belle sent him a level look, and he grinned, hugging her and Gideon.

“Bye, Belle,” said Henry cheerfully, throwing his arms around her before picking up his book.

“Drive safely,” she called after them, and watched them leave, Neal’s arm resting around Henry’s shoulders.

Belle chewed her lip, thinking hard.  Coincidence.  It has to be coincidence.  It can’t be true, that would be crazy.  There must be hundreds of people called Milah.  With Scottish exes. Who took their sons away from their fathers around age two.

She shook her head, and set Gideon back in the stroller, making her way to the counter to order two takeout coffees and four stem ginger cookies.  Her mind was whirling, and she barely registered the coffees being set in front of her. The scent of the cookies in their brown paper bag brought her back to the present, and she paid, uttering thanks in an absent voice before turning back to the door.  She needed to talk to Gold.

She was chewing her lip thoughtfully as she walked, one hand on the stroller and the other carrying the cardboard tray with its coffee cups.  Gold appeared to spy her through the shop window, and strode quickly to the door, taking the coffees from her. Belle pushed the stroller through to the back room.

“Did you catch Emma?” he asked, and she bent to unbuckle Gideon, lifting him out to sit on the floor with his coloured blocks again.

“I did,” she said, straightening up.  “They’re heading up the coast. Coming back in a few days.  I said we could have dinner again before they head back to Boston.”

“Ah.”

He took a sip of coffee, wincing a little at the heat of it before setting it on his workbench, and Belle bent to retrieve the paper bag of cookies from the stroller.

“Tell me about your son,” she said.  “You said his name was Bailey. Did - did he have your last name?”

Gold gave her a wry smile.

“No.  Milah’s.  As I said, I was never named as his father.  Should have taken steps to change that, but alas…”

He shrugged resignedly, and she chewed her lower lip.

“So - what was her surname?”

“Bonny,” he said, and Belle swallowed.

“And - and you said you weren’t there when he was born,” she said.  “So was that in your hometown, or—”

“No, no, he was born in Newcastle, in the north of England,” said Gold, running a hand through his hair.  “I think she spent a year or so there, from what I remember her saying. Probably the longest she stayed anywhere.”

His tone was rueful.  Belle could feel her heart thudding in her chest.

“When was his birthday?” she asked.

“First of May,” he said immediately.

“The day after Gideon’s,” she said, under her breath.

“Yes,” he said, with a smile, and glanced at her.  “Why all the questions?”

She hesitated, but raised her chin.

“Because I think I might have found him.”

[phantomren-mk2000]

Can u tell us more about that Oso-San oc of yours? Kuromatsu? He just seems like a neat (heh) character. I'm interested in his personality.

Well I could share things about him (btw I don't know if I'm using the right words for describing him nor for the speech grammars since English wasn't really my first language)

Also sorry for the very late answers.

• Kuromatsu is a gentle, kind and quiet natured type of guy who'll listen to someone talking to him for hours. He only gets (a bit) talkative when he was asked about something he well knew of (examples: what happened on the news, what he ate today/yesterday, where he recently went.)

• His height is 147cm (4'8), weighting about 44.1kg (97lbs) and he's 1 year younger than the sextuplets. His birthday is on May 24th.

• His favorite food is fried rice, omurice, takoyaki, ramen, oden, strawberry shortcake and choco ice pop.

• His favorite drink is milk, chocomilk, strawberry milk and juice (mainly apple, orange, lemon and mango).

• Animals he likes are cats and dogs.

• He got adopted to the Matsuno family for a very odd reason and that is being the factor for the sextuplets to get a job. Though it didn't successfully happen and he ended up being a financial support to the family. He was a first child of his old family and he had one mean younger sister. He's really glad that he got adopted to a different family since he gets older brothers, not to mention sextuplets (which is rarer than a rare steak.)

• When he gets complimented about something he's good at, he sometimes kinda gets shy and embarrassed.

• He learn how to keep his emotions to himself due to his dark past, though the disadvantage is that he couldn't express much like any other people.

• He wasn't a very good liar, nor a bad one. He gets pretty cautious about his words whenever he aims to say a believable lie although when he's nervous/panicking, his lie doesn't make sense to the point that it gets too bizarre to even happen.

• Talking to women is difficult for him and finds them confusing to understand (for example: Totoko - with cute looks, comes scary personality and weird idol outfit taste.)

• He likes watching videos on the internet/TV since he could just stay quiet for a long periods of time.

• He also likes reading comics, story books and novels (that isn't popcorn, if you know what I meant) since he also could just stay quiet for a long periods of time. Although sometimes he take his eyes off the book whenever someone was talking to him.

• He always keeps his judgements, complaints and opinions to himself. But at rare times, he let it out once he got too much of the same thing within the same day.

• He doesn't know how to express his joy naturally but sometimes he unconsciously smiles (whenever he's around any of the sextuplets and they're doing something he finds silly/funny)

• He had black as his signature color to be told apart from the Sextuplets and well because he's Kuro(black) matsu. He originally planned to have his signature color white, though decided it to be black since he didn't want to standing out.

• He rarely drinks beer/alcohol because he didn't like the taste of it and he's worried about what he'll do when he's drunk despite having high tolerance of it (he gets super super quiet when drunk and only listens to his brothers, the sextuplets.)

• He enjoys being with his brothers (despite the fact that he knew they're all NEETs)

• Despite being the very youngest (adopted) child in the Matsuno family, he was able to have part-time jobs though only does his 2 jobs separately, 3-4 times per week in 6-7 hours. His part-time jobs is being a bookstore clerk at Kazumoto Bookstore and an employee at NEAT Mart (made up places that lets him work less than 30-35 hours per week)

• He can do household chores (laundry, washing the dishes, cooking, etc)

hope this is good enough informations :)

[bbbambam]

You're right I'm in love with Hawks 😩💞 also have I mentioned how much I love his wings! If I had a quirk it would def have smth to do with wings 🧚🏽‍♀️ also I want some kinda power too! What sort of a quirk would you have? 👀

Bakugo if literally the gordon ramsay of the anime world 🤣 Those tik toks just crack me up a perfect representaion of the fandom 😂😭

I don't think it's weird that you just got tik tok! Call me old school but I prefer to stay away from social media especially tik tok and twitter Youtube is literally the only other app on my phone curse my phone storage 😐

This convo has been going on for so long that I forgot what it's about 🤣 I hope it's ok that I randomly drop asks so late 😬

ahhh hawks… why am i always thinking about smth like… chicken nuggets, chicken wings, fried chicken, roasted chicken… (wait that’s too many chicken… o < o) every time someone mentioned his name??? i def ain’t normal my mum shouting from the background : “YOU NEVER ARE!” alright i might… or might not be an idiot idk any more atp 😶

yesss that awesome crimson wings! (me no.2 : korean fried chicken! me no.1 : HELL NO STFU!!!) oooo wings? hmmm what kind of power do you want?? 🤔 eh i kind of have a quirk in mind… for me it def have smth to do with wind, wait — why don’t we just design our own quirk!??? that sounds AWESOME!!!! oh oh oh and that day when i randomly daydreaming i was thinking about creating some type of breathing of my own, like the kny thing… what kind of breathing would you like to use if you’re in kny? or do you perhaps have your own breathing that you’d like to use?

AHAHAHAHA anyone would be lucky to have the taste of his food. except for one thing… SPICY… he loves ‘em… but i can’t handle ‘em… 🥲 (god help me T^T) oh! imagine bakugou cooking cold soba for todo-chan while also turn and grumbled (shouting) about whatever irritates him (+ there’s a lot of thing that could irritate him…) EVERY SINGLE FIVE MINS. how does that sound? i kind of love the dynamic <333 *proud*

SAME. it doesn’t make sense at all but that is why it’s fun. ‘you’re mad, i’m mad, we’re all mad here’ you know, ofc this quote ain’t mine go blame the cheshire cat — alright i think i srsly need a therapist bahahaha XD

Wha thank you! FINALLY. someone understood me oml — *pls lemme give you a hug* it’s been less than 2 months since i got twitter… and i hardly ever go there lol 😂 true! youtube used to be the only app i used the most too! <33 augh — phone storage… augh —

lol i can’t remember as well — but i love it tho, like i really enjoy talking to you sissy!! and i totally didn’t mind how long this convo’s been or how long it might continue, i just love conversing with you! (despite replying late — i’m sorry 🙏🙏🙏) oh we’re just the same luv, dw my inbox’s always open, i love getting asks plus i’m totally fine with late reply! (cuz um — i do too, lollll 😂😂😂)

[fugoukeijis]

secret santa anon has returned ~ 🌸🥳 ahhh i'm so so sorry for being so mia lately 🥺 irl sucks 😭 how have you been? not too busy i hope. have you been taking care of yourself? getting enough sleep? drinking enough water? i hope you are 😘 i've been meaning to ask a few questions to make up for my absence (and honestly, i really love your long answers so don't hold back 🤗) what’s your favorite color? what kind of animanga do you like? action, drama, slice of life? do you have a favourite color scheme or aesthetic? what’s your favorite anime to gif or edit from? and do you prefer manga or anime? (haha last one is a tough one i know but there are pros and cons to both)

omg hii, love!! i missed you so much. how have you been? i hope irl wasn't too hard and that you got some proper rest. you absolutely have no reason to say sorry since we’re on the same boat. i’ve been well, but even on this break, studies seemed to be a burden since my the dates for my final exams were released. so i’m very sorry for the long wait i’d given you on this ask. irl drains all your energy, doesn’t it? thank you so much for all those lovely questions, i drank another glass of water just now for you. ❤ my sleep has been kinda meh but we’re getting there. 😅

i love talking to you so my answers tend to be big hehe. i’m glad you enjoy them (sending you a big hug!). please ask me more questions too, as much as you want. i love talking! <3 

my fave color might be red, black and yellow. i don’t seem to have a specific one haha. i love dark aesthetics but yellow is just such a soft color. 

hmm well i tend to watch a lot of genres. 🤔 but i think i lean onto those kind of animanga more which have a lot of action, suspense and adventure. it pumps me up so much and increases the hype. comedy and slice of life come in when i need a breather and it does help a lot. ☺

hmm i don’t think i have a color scheme or aesthetic? i’m pretty new into making gifs and usually just darken them but i’ve gotten a new program so i will try coloring too. i hope that makes sense? i’m putting a lot of that into the gift i’m making. it’s what i’m doing when i get time to work (after my brain is nearly fried by my books ><) and my aesthetic is mostly a pale or dark one. i vibe to it a lot :3 

i’ve only made gifs from bnha and fkbu until now, sometimes re:zero. though, i really enjoyed my editing phase for fkbu and i wish to gif it more. especially haru, every gif of him is precious. heck, every frame of that man is precious. 🥺

oh i think anime? it might be a surprise, but i haven’t read a lot of manga yet. i hope to soon! do you have any good recs? i actually don’t read manga to avoid seeing spoilers for anime haha but i really wanna read some of them. ❤

wbu? what are your answers to all the questions? i’m curious to know! 👀 oh, and also. have you watched attack on titan? i’m currenly watching that and oh my god is it amazing. i’m living for all those amazing animations. but at the same time, i’m scared to proceed with each episode. i’m already on season 2, i’m def digging into it. 😁

have a wonderful day, dear! i’m looking forward to your next ask. stay safe, take care and see you! 💛💛

[thataspdfeel]

I'm curious, what are you most attracted to in your partners? Is it similar traits in all of them or different ones like their sense of humour etc.? Sorry if this is a weird question but you've said before you like when people ask about them so I thought I would.

i was so excited to get this and then forgot to answer it :/ im an idiot

also gonna put this under a cut cause this is gonna be hella long cause im a fucking romantic dork

god though i could wax poetic. they’re all so lovely. like they have traits in common but also are unique. they all have brown eyes but theyre unique. like my husband has these eyes that remind me of warm chocolate. like a chocolate fountain kind of warm chocolate. dark and smooth but reflect the light. my wife’s have tinges of gold in the irises like flecks of gold leaf. and theres a dark ring around the pupil and one around the edge of the iris. theyre fucking magical

my boyfriend’s eyes are almost black and very deep. darker than the night sky and full of warmth and mischief. but its like theyre never ending, like he can see the innermost parts of whoever he’s looking at, like your soul is written on your forehead

lmao i love eyes can you tell

they all have these goddamned sinful eyelashes and my boyfriend’s are the longest. theyre as dark as his eyes and when he’s embarrassed, he gets all shy and they brush against his cheekbones like how dare you sir. how dare you be beautiful even when youre embarrassed. i look like a fucking tomato. rude

my husband’s look gold at the tips with the way the light catches them. like yknow how fake eyelashes have purple or red at the tips? like that except gold. like what??? the fuck??? rude

they all have very soft hair though my boyfriend’s is the longest. i cant wait to get with him irl again cause i wanna braid it. he’s got a bony face and it frames it so well. it’s so dark brown its almost black and it’s fun to see him try to sweep it out of his face cause he refuses to tie it up

my husband has these wild curls. we were looking up how to take care of them and that’s how we found out hes ethnically jewish. (which makes sense considering he’s german) they get so thick and heavy and they’re so soft and lovely to nap in. which i do on a semi regular basis. its so soft and lovely and i love when he grows it out. he just doesn’t look right with shorter hair. and he has this beard that grows funny, makes him look like jedidiah if yknow what i mean. he has such a baby face without it and he loves beard scritches it’s so cute how happy he gets

bluh im bouncing all over the place i just??? love them?????? so??????????? much???????????????? there’s so much to talk about!!!

so i guess i’ll just try and make a list of the things i love about them

husband:

cheerful, bubbly, very sunny personality. the human incarnation of a very excited dog (which can be A Lot sometimes)

extremely kind. would give you the shirt off his back. often laments that he stopped carrying cash years ago every time he sees somebody who could use some despite the fact that we’re always broke

a proper southern gentleman??? like im fat so im used to people not holding doors open for me fucking ever and being really goddamned rude in general. he ALWAYS holds doors open for me, opens the car door for me both to get in and out of the car, and gets pouty if i try and carry my own bag. it’s so sweet??? ive literally never had that before and even after three and a half years, it’s still so charming

he will do literally anything the fuck i ask. he’ll say no and im like oh ok and he’ll tease like “finally! i said no! and got away with it!” just to make me giggle and then does it anyway

on this note, he also always cooks as much as absolutely possible. even though his spine gives him problems, he does his best to keep me off my leg

he’s always so concerned about my well being. like if there’s not a disability cart at the front of a store, he makes me sit down while he goes and chases one down. if im stiffer than usual due to a cold front, he’ll remind me to take pain meds every four hours

he’s trying to learn japanese because he knows i dont have anybody to practice with here in the states. just for me and not any other reason

adores animals. even if he finds a dog annoying, he’ll still fawn over it and give it as many pets as it wants and won't ever snap at it even if anybody else would. he’s got these large hands and he’s kind of clumsy but this goes away around animals. he’s just so careful and gentle like i never ever worry

drags me out of my introverted cave because he knows social interaction is also good

has introduced me to some of my favorite books and video games because he’s verious conscious about what somebody likes and works to be like “hey, i think youd like this” and is almost always correct??? amazing

has 0 sense of style but doesnt mind somebody who knows better keeping him from absolute disaster

dude is a damned good cook. ive gained like at least a solid 25 pounds since he moved in and started cooking regularly

SPEAKING OF COOKING, we met on the tail end of my anorexia when i was doing my best to recover and still slipping up. he never made me feel bad about it but always encouraged me to eat. he eats SO much (think shaggy rogers) that i always felt comfortable eating in front of him. he always reminds me to eat and asks if ive eaten that day. honestly, i wouldnt be at this level of recovery if it hadnt been for him

is amazing at caling me down holy fuck

wife:

met her first, of the three of them, ironically so ive known her the longest but been with her the shortest. we dated a few months in hs but there was a chick she wanted to date like right there (and i was in japan) so i was like oh go for it. well, they broke up and we got back together and it’s been lovely ever since

she has this snorting laugh that’s adorable to listen to and it makes me feel more comfortable laughing (because i think i sound like a damn goose)

SHE HAS SO MANY GODDAMNED FRECKLES ON HER CUTE LITTLE FACE THEY’RE ADORABLE AND AMAZING AND VERY FUN TO KISS BECAUSE SHE SQUIRMS

she has a goddamned button nose for chrissakes

and these really wide hips too like i felt bad about my hips years ago cause theyre p wide but shes adorable and has wide hips too. she kinda made me love them (even though hers are better)

she’s genderfluid so i get to be gay all across the gender spectrum (im agender) and she’s so beautiful and handsome and v amazing

we were both homestuck fans at the height of it (like we still are) but her cosplays are just really well done??? shes so talented

OH MY GOD SHE MAKES THIE CHICKEN SOUP WITH HOMEMADE NOODLES I WOULD SLAP AN OLD LADY FOR

i dont know about the rest of her cooking (sadly) due to limited time around each other but i cant fucking wait tbh. her cookies kill me tho i love them

an amazing fashion sense. im a dumpster compared to her

an amazing writer and artist and i die every time she sends me something like my soul fucking ascends

she loved me BEFORE meds which i think is amazing. like what a lovely human being yknow? im a dick without meds and she loved me anyway and i love that about her

she speaks german and she makes it sound beautiful and i cry

her singing voice is so angelic and it kills me when she sings because everybody should hear this lovely person sing

she is hyper empathetic and it makes her so lovely and kind and wonderful. she completely understands how i feel about things and why even when no one else does and is very good at de-escalating me when im upset

we’ve just known each other for something like 7 years now? like i dated her post my abusive ex and she lit up my whole world with happiness at being treated well. then her ex was abusive and just... we get each other? in a way where her husband and my other two partners dont. its a pain the others dont understand so we go to each other during these times of pain in a way we cant with other people. it’s a very special connection

she’s a goddamned goof and i love it

my boyfriend:

motherfucker is so skinny which is the opposite of me and for some reason it works?? idk like it worries me but it’s also unique. love it

we dated almost my whole senior year of hs but he broke up with me because he thought he didnt have the same depth of emotion as i did for him and didnt want to “hold me back” from somebody better. like??? can you imagine?????? how fucking kind

recently started dating again like it took him fourish years for him to realize SHIT I MADE A MISTAKE so he’s a little slow but he’s so very thoughtful

he’s a goof in a different way than the other two. dad jokes. never ending fucking dad jokes. and goddamned puns. he never stops. dont tell him i love them because then he’ll never let me tease him again (i pretend like its The Worst)

so. fucking. dramatic. always flips his hair in the sassiest way possible. its super gay (he’s bi)

he doesnt do a whole lot of romance or saying WHY he feels certain ways. he feels like it cheapens the emotion. but, on the rare occassion he doesnt let this bother him, his poetry he sends me about how he feels makes me fucking cry. it’s so beautiful. i love it

he works watering at a plant nursery and complains about how the bees always use him as a landing strip. it’s adorable

he’s so resourceful?? this is best seen when playing minecraft cause he makes some damn cool structures in some really nice places. i love playing it with him just to see what he builds and how (especially since im a boring, lets make this house a square kinda ho)

he’s so camera shy??? no selfies no skype at all. he’s so bashful and it’s super cute i love it

got me into DnD like yes thank you for this enjoyable nerdery

the sole reason i passed math in hs. like not only is he smart but hes also really good at explaining things to people? definitely a talent for teaching people things

he was my best friend for the longest time like all three of them are my best friend but he was the only one who was my best friend FIRST and then romance blossomed

like im demiromantic so i need a strong connection to fall in love like it was a solid few months of dating my husband before i began to love him. i knew my wife for awhile and got close so same general story. but my boyfriend and i were more friends to lovers and i love that about him

his dad is half italian so he talks with his hands and it’s so overdramatic that he hits people with them on a semi regular basis just gesturing. he once accidentally knocked my glasses all the way across a room cause i had walked behind him and he made a sweeping gesture. hilarious

one time, i had food poisoning and the pain was so bad, i had to crawl under his kitchen table until my mother came to take me to the base clinic. he sat with my head in his lap and brushed my hair out of my face and cooed gently at me to try and soothe me. it was so sweet and ive never forgotten about it

motherfucker, with the help of my sister, dragged me into homestuck

he’s so damn shy about affection that holdling his hand in public makes him blush. it’s even worse if i steal a kiss. fucking adorable

things all three have in common that i love:

good in bed. it sounds silly but this is important to me because while i dont necessarily need sex to form a close relationship to fall in love, it definitely helps

idk how this happened, i really dont, but somehow everything i like lines up nicely with everything they like??? and if im not into something, they can find it with each other and vise versa. lmao wtf how did this happen to line up idk

kind, generous, sweet, and helpful although all three show these qualities in different ways despite having them in common

love me??? like honestly it sounds so silly that id love that they love me but im such a flawed, terrible human being that it leaves me in deep awe that not only does one person love me but three??? how??? amazing people to find something in me to love and to keep on loving despite all my problems. beautiful

creative, smart, and inventive each in their own right. they fucking astound me and take my breath away

beautiful cuddlers (not being sarcastic, promise)

husband is a goddamned heater but boyfriend is a living block of ice. then wife is one of those who’s in between but she steals your heat and then hours later gives it back which is the worse option of the three. like it starts out all nice but then you end up surprised hours later because youre fucking dying of heatstroke

so we have two heatstroke, drowning in sweat options and then losing your limbs. it makes trying to set the thermostat a fucking nightmare

they all love to read and honestly? i couldnt be with anyone who doesnt like a good book

can hold lively, in depth discussions about things

hubby tends to lean more towards “would it be immoral to fuck a succubus” type morality questions and superhero dissection type things

wife is all over the place and can carry on a conversation about goddamned teapots if she so chose. no idea how she does it

boyfriend likes to entertain more morbid thoughts and psychology but also likes to analyze things. like homestuck. we still fucking dissect homestuck

very intelligent. blows my dumb ass out of the water. beautiful

like gaming various amounts and various kinds of games. hubs likes any and all. boyfriend likes dnd, monster hunter, minecraft etc kinds of things, not really one for cards or board games. wife prefers to craft but will occasionally engage in board games or cards, less so in video games but tends to stick to pokemon. it’s nice

they’re all very physically beautiful though in different ways. hubby is barrel chested and german with very strong arms and big hands, a bright and sunny smile. wife is small and round with tiny, artist hands and a sweet, pixie face. boyfriend is thin, long, and gaunt with pale skin and dark hair (kind of like damien from dream daddy tbh)

i could go on but ive been making this post for like well over two hours now and i figured maybe i should stop. it’s long as hell and idk if anybody else would have read this whole thing but basically i fucking adore my partners??? so much??? and there are so many things about them to love???

i just love them so much and could go on and on for hours about why i love each of them and how lovely they are and how they make me feel

ksdjrfgh im so sorry this is so long theres just so much to talk about //sweats