#does this make ANY sense is anyone reading this. hello. where am i. what is this place.

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

i see a lot of interpretations of zor being this otherworldly, anomalous presence- larger than life, practically non-human. and i, too, like perceiving zor through this veil of anonymity. i think making them too tangible or perceivable really detracts from what's been established about their character.

but, i personally really, really like the thought of zor being human. mortal. but terrifying to the point where you'd be forgiven for forgetting it.

i think one of the things that i adored about ieytd before the third game dropped (and honestly made me a little disappointed when it was changed later on) was the fact that the agency never had a face. it just... was what it was. it had facets- granted, the EOD was always the only one of any relevance. but, really, think about what we know about the agency between all three games. compare that to how much we know about zoraxis.

there's something really appealing to me about zor being who they are... they're probably the most wealthiest person on earth. they had a monopoly that quite literally gripped the world in their first- as their emblem would suggest. they hire some of the most lethal minds in the world- chemists, inventors, engineers.

and yet... despite it all, they're just one person. to me, their anonymity is a shield against the fact they are a person. they hide behind the lethality and prowess of their elite operatives- not to mention we've seen how clever they can be when it came to manipulating prism. they're by no means useless.

but what would they be without their anonymity? what would they be without the weapons they didn't design, the lairs they didn't build, the employees they use as human shields? the second zor is gone, zoraxis crumbles. they are the support pillar of their entire corporation.

... but what's the agency's equivalent? even post morales being a character, can we be certain that he's the glue holding the entire organization together?

think about zoraxis' most lethal schemes. seizing control of the world's atomic weaponry. striking targets anywhere on earth's surface with a giant laser. exploding the brain of every telekinetic agent on the planet. are they really seeking to cause as much damage as possible- to the agency specifically, collateral, or otherwise?

or do they not know where to strike. zor's tactic- for as high the stakes have been escalating- has always carried a similar motif. cleave and strike indiscriminately until the threat is neutralized.

but it never works. zor is lashing at a hydra- sprouting new heads where the old ones have been lopped off. they don't seem aware of how to destroy the agency other than exterminating each and every one of them off the face of the earth, in whatever way is most convenient at the moment.

i just think there's something to be said about zoraxis- and by extension, zor- always being seen as this oppressive, near-otherworldly force, constantly applying pressure on phoenix... when for all we know, zoraxis could be perceiving the agency in the exact same light.

zor, ultimately, has one beating heart. the agency has thousands. and all of them are dispensable.

[flippinpancakes64]

Hi! Hope your doing well

Can I get the cullens with reader who is sick and wants nothing but cuddles?

The Cullens with a sick reader

Hello! I am doing well thank you!

I went for just a general sickness not really like a specific one so imagine whatever you want.

Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!

Edward:

He's really concerned

The most concerned of all of them, actually

His mother died from the flu and he was going to as well

So any illness reminds him that you're human and that what happened to his mom could happen to you too

He insists on Carlisle staying home to look after you

He is pacing, he is breathing heavy, he looks like he's on the verge of death

It's only when Carlisle manages to get through to him that you'll be fine does he finally calm down

Then he notices that your skin is really clammy and you're really hot

What better way to cool down than a literal block of ice?

He will lay there with you as long as you need

It doesn't matter if he's hungry and needs to hunt

If you're still sick he is not leaving the house

Much less leaving your side

Alice:

She saw this coming

Maybe you did something stupid and like stood in the rain with a t shirt and shorts on

Or maybe you just accidentally crossed paths with a kid who was sick at your school

Either way she saw you being sick a couple of days in advance

It gave her enough time to prepare everything that you would need

She was also able to see that you ended up being fine, so she doesn't worry too much

You don't even need to ask for cuddles though

She is already there

The good part about being prepared ahead of time is that she has everything she needs

She doesn't need to leave the room to go get you anything

She doesn't need to go hunt

She is just there at your service, ready to comfort

Jasper:

He could tell you weren't feeling good when you walked in the room and your upset mood made its way to his senses

He's a little lost on how to help

In his time, when people got sick you threw them out of the wagon so they didn't infect others

Or, alternatively, you just set them up in a nice, comfy place to die <3

So yeah he's a little helpless

If you're lucid enough to tell him what you need he'll do it

Other than that he gets Carlisle's help

The moment you open your arms and ask him to hold you, he is there

Like immediately

If he can't help any other way on your road to recovery, this is the least he can do

Like the others, he would hate to leave you

But he's a lot less used to the vegetarian diet

And being so close to you doesn't help

So if this falls at a bad time where he needs to go hunt, he's gonna have to leave

He would hate to do it

But it's for your safety

Rosalie:

Basically built for this

I mean, she wants to be a mom really bad

Those little shits get sick every 2 business days

I feel like she's read enough parenting books to be able to know how to help you

She doesn't let anyone near you

Not even Carlisle

She insists she has it under control

And to her credit, she does

However she gets a bit lost in the technicalities of it

Like checking your temperature every ten minutes, making sure the food she gets you has the right amount of nutrients, keeping the room at a solid temperature

You're gonna have to be the one to stop her

Just tell her that while you appreciate everything she's done for you, all you really want is to be held

She takes a moment to process it before she gets in the bed immediately

Does not leave

Even if she's starving

Emmett:

When he was still alive, he had a younger sister

So I feel like he wouldn't be too inexperienced when it comes to taking care of someone when they're sick

However I feel like he has a very antiquated sense of medicine

He'd go out and buy like cocaine-infused adderall or smthn and say that this is what he used to take when he felt sick

Don't take anything he gives you

It's for your safety

Just tell him the best medicine he could give you is some cuddles

And he'll drop whatever else he was planning to try to give you

If you can stand, it would be in your best interest to ask Carlisle to help you instead

He has the spirit though

And I feel like cuddling with him would be the best

Esme:

Another one with a bit of trauma surrounding illnesses

Her baby died due to an illness and now she's scared

She doesn't want to lose you too

Even though she knows the likelihood of you dying is small, she still can't help it

Another one who's asking Carlisle for help

Sorry Carlisle

Anyway she is at your beck and call

Soup? Done. And it's homemade

Water? Done. Fresh from Fiji

You want the room to be colder? Yeah just hold on a sec while she goes and harvests a piece from an iceberg

In the middle of all of her running around you're gonna have to stop her and just tell her that all you want is cuddles

Instantly she is setting up some candles, putting on a movie, and holding you in bed

Is not convinced that you are all better even after you've completely recovered

For at least another week she is still hoverinfg

Carlisle:

The man of the hour

When you told him you were sick it was like saying you're thirsty as you're standing in front of a stream of fresh, clean water

No need to worry you're in good hands

Instantly gets to work

He finds out what you're sick with, how long you'll have it, what your symptoms will be, and the best treatment options in the blink of an eye

Gets everything set up at lightning speed

But after he's got everything set out for you and he knows you don't need anything else, he takes a step back and sees that you are still missing something

When you ask if he can cuddle, he wastes no time

He calls into the clinic and tells them that he can't make it today or tomorrow

Unfortunately, though, he will leave at some point

He takes his job very seriously

Hence why he's still working even though he has enough money to buy all of Europe twice over

So he will leave to go back to work

But he won't work extra long shifts

Or stay up late doing paperwork

You are the priority

Vampire! Bella:

She's a little helpless

Charlie wasn't the most ideal parent to be sick around

He believed that everything fixes itself

And though Renee was a lot better at that, a little of Charlie still rubbed off on her

But of course, she does remember the agony of being sick

It's not that she's not sympathetic, it's just that she doesn't know what to do

So again she leaves that up to Carlisle if it's really bad

She was already curled up with you before you even got the chance to ask

She figured that since there was nothing else she could do she might as well just comfort you

Will leave a couple of times though

She'll go hunt or go pick up a new book if she finishes her old one

So I'd say she's there like 98% of the time

[honeymilktea-444]

♡🧸 What will your love life look like in 2025 ? 18+ ♡🧸

Hello my babies. Take a deep breath in and out and choose the picture/pile/number you’re most drawn to. The numbers are on the pictures. Enjoy, take what resonates and leave the rest! 💖✌🏾☺️ The piles are long that’s how I channel☺️. Excuse any typos. Enjoy. 💖☺️

♡🧸 Pile 1 ♡🧸

• 8 of swords (rx) •

This year in 2025 for my pile one babies, you’re breaking free from a situation in love. Maybe some of you are finally getting over someone that had you in a chokehold. Some of you may be escaping abusive situations, or lastly some of you may be coming out of your head and actually moving forward to take action towards a love situation. This card in reverse can represent coming out of stagnant energy. Being stuck or frozen in your head, nervous and anxious, a change in perspective and knowing what you need to do to get what you want in whatever situation but sitting there and doing nothing out of fear of change, rejection or whatever it may be. You’re coming out of this, and moving forward. For those of you moving out of a state of frozen fear, you’ll realize it was nothing to be afraid of in the first place. For those of you escaping abusive situations, don’t look back. You’ll know whatever scenario is specifically for you.

I’m also hearing do it now, don’t wait around to make these changes that you know you need to make in love. If this is a love situation where you are busting out of fear, and inaction to pursue someone, I’m getting there may be some difficulties in the sense of their personality specifically I’m hearing they may be stubborn, or ruminating over certain things in their mind. They also may not be very expressive over what they are feeling, they may just not talk about things or want to. It’s not in a way where they expect you to read their mind, they don’t. They simply don’t want to talk about certain things. You may have to have patience with this person, or pry it out of them or persist. Specifically I’m hearing pull it out of them. I’m channeling that just because they may be difficult at first does not mean choosing them was the wrong decision. This person does not come across as cold or mean, just very quietly sad. You may also have shut down on this person and now they have shut down as well, and have decided to just quietly walk around with a deep sadness.

They bring a lot of positivity outwardly to others though. They don’t take it out on anyone. Maybe you know this person already, or something happened between you two. They could have a random mean streak or say passive aggressive things, those instances mean something triggered the pain. Nonetheless, do not give up on this person. All in all they are a very positive, loving person, there’s just a wound somewhere, that makes them randomly grumpy. I am channeling you know exactly why. They may have their ways about them but if you two reconcile, you will notice they won’t go anywhere and that should be a good enough indicator that they love you too. I’m hearing the word young. This person could be younger than you, it could be an age gap between you two. Even though this person is young, they feel old. They may be very mature for their age, or have been through a lot. They outwardly may be very cheery but inside this is what goes on with this person. Again, I see no reason to give up. This person isn’t going to mistreat you, everyone goes through things inside their minds and hearts. This person doesn’t put on a facade though. They genuinely are a positive person they just hurt over things sometimes like any normal person. I’m also hearing this person is funny, or witty or has a weird sense of humor. This person may joke about things they’ve gone through that actually aren’t funny but that’s how they handle it. Even if they’ve healed from it, they may still joke about it. It’s just their coping mechanism. Also somethings they genuinely have healed from and look back and laugh it’s not a a coping mechanism. They do this weird thing where they either joke about something or absolutely never bring it up. If they never bring something up it may be a more serious issue where they don’t even want to joke or think about it. I’m also hearing “it is what it is” this person has an attitude of if they can’t change it why talk about it. Which I’m not sure if it’s healthy or not. It can be in some cases, but talking about things is good too. It depends on the situation. They just like to focus on the positive and they actual can change s they don’t miss the opportunities they have in the present which is actually very healthy. This pile is making chuckle because the picture for this pile one of the cats (the feminine one) is grumpy in the pic, and that was done on accident. So it’s confirmation.

Each of you knows what fits for your personal situation. This person overall is a peace loving, positive person, they like to laugh, they are a little shy, they like things to be calm and peaceful but they struggle just everyone else. As you do to. Keep that in mind. Don’t patronize them. Another big thing that is coming through is this could be that you were avoidant of this person, or stuck in fear and in your head by being insecure and wondering if certain things about you, will this person like it. The answer is yes. The things you are afraid of being judged for they won’t judge you. They may even like the same things. This person is feeling very rejected by you and not good enough due to you being avoidant, inexpressive and scared. It has wounded this person in a certain way, and they wonder what is it about them that you don’t like. So that is why they are now returning the energy and acting funny towards you. You’ve hurt them in some way because of this behavior and it may be very hard for them to believe what you are saying as far as you liking them or even loving them, because your actions have shown otherwise. They aren’t one to be delusional. They will compeletely believe what they see with their own eyes and none of what they hear. If you say something but do this opposite they won’t believe anything you say. They ignore what people say and focus on how they act. This person is very sharp, and doesn’t suffer fools lightly. They could also be very street smart or have been through things where they have had to pay attention to how people move as opposed to what they say. They also pay attention to how people make them feel. If they feel off about someone or someone rubs them the wrong way and gives them a funny feeling, they won’t engage with them and immediately withdraw. I’m getting a mouse energy or a cat that like to hide in grocery bags and boxes. Or a child that snatches their hand away when they touch something hot and then never touches it again.

This person learns lessons really quickly and will stay away the moment someone’s burned them so they don’t get burned again. I’m channeling the song “Guard your heart” by Big Sean. The specific part of the song that says “I hear you, but right now I need to feel you. This all I got proof that you got me” It is possible that you are so busy in your head that you don’t show up for this person. You could also come off very selfish, constantly worried about your problems when they have problems and need support too. This person may feel like you want understanding but don’t give any. This person is practical and grounded. They want someone who’s head is firmly on their shoulders and not in the clouds. Someone who goes off of what they see and not fantasies or scenarios that haven’t happened yet in their head. Your feet need to be firmly planted on the ground, constantly being in your head is taking away your credibility and trustworthiness to this person because you won’t show up for them, they can’t depend on you because you’re somewhere not answering their calls or floating around in your head. I’m getting an energy of dropping the ball. You may have let this person down and disappointed them to the point where they won’t pass you the ball anymore and may be very reluctant to trust you or get close to you anymore. You may have pulled away from this person when they needed you the most. I’m picking up it was a horrible time to isolate your self. I’m picking up an energy of someone saying “oh no not now, don’t do this now. I need you. Please.” and someone breaking down crying because of an unanswered phone call or text. I’m also hearing “it wasn’t a joke” or they were dead serious, so take that how it resonates. You may have ignored this person, or left this person stranded. It’s the energy of someone needing a ride immediately and when they go to call someone they don’t pick up phone and or when they go to call someone they realize the battery on the phone has run out and they don’t have a charger. That is how this person felt. I’m channeling the song “About Time” by Justine Skye and “Let me down” by Kehlani. I’m also channeling the song “Above and Beyond” by a Jhene Aiko. If this person made you mad, they feel like it wasn’t enough for you to abandon them. They may feel like yes they make mistakes but they are always there for you. You may expect them to be there for you through their mistakes, but don’t give the same in return. I do see this person needed you really bad, and you weren’t there. You may also have been with a 3rd party instead. In the Jhene Aiko song she said “you had a b*tch in your passenger side, I called your phone and you just denied me. Really surprising, that wasn’t like you, I thought you liked me”. So it feels like you shell shocked this person or really broke their heart by abandoning them. It seems like you two had an understanding or at-least they thought. I’m hearing “maybe they don’t love me like I thought” or “maybe I was wrong” They feel they may have been wrong about how they thought you felt about them, or they thought you felt the same but maybe they were wrong about it. This is what they’re thinking. Now they have withdrawn from you as well because they don’t want to bother anyone that in their mind doesn’t want them nor do they want to overplay their part. They also have no interest in being abandoned again so they are staying away in order to not put themselves in that position again. They are questioning how much they meant to you, and feeling very stupid and promising themselves they won’t let anyone do them like this again. This person may not let many people in the way they did you, and this is exactly the reason why. I’m also hearing you can’t play everybody, or treat everyone the same pile 1. Some ppl take love very seriously and don’t take games or heartbreak lightly. I’m picking up a song by Tyga- Reminded where he says “Some people say it’s wrong being single isn’t right, but if you hurt the right person you’ll be wrong all your life” .

Repairing their trust may take work. For some of you, they won’t take you back and it’s just a harsh lesson for you to learn. But, for majority of you, they will. The energy is simply letting you know they won’t be very cooperative at first. Still move forward and try. Never give up on what you love especially if you have truly learned your lesson. Be persistent and I do see reconciliation. If you didn’t do this, but someone did it to you, this person will get out of their head and come towards ready, but you will have such a hard time wanting anything to do with this person or opening up fully again, they won’t give up on you and I’m picking up majority of you will take them back, reluctantly but you will eventually nonetheless. Some of you won’t and this is the situation you’re freeing your mind from. It may have been so hard for you to wrap your head around being abandoned in this way. Everyone’s human, and you will move forward with a free mind. Anyways, reconciliation is not applicable to those of you I mentioned who may be escaping or breaking free from a situation that’s abusive or dangerous, it’s only for those that are breaking free from anxiousness when it comes to going forward towards this person or taking someone back that got stuck in their head, and dropped the ball. Good luck my pile 1 babies! 💖

♡ Pile 2 ♡🧸

• 9 of pentacles •

This upcoming year of 2025. You will be focusing solely on stability, security, health, physically glowing up and self esteem/self worth. There won’t be much action in love this year, by choice. You are pouring into yourself one hundred percent. I’m also picking up on celibacy. The results of this will be great. You’ll really develop a strong sense of self and who you are. You are also becoming very independent. Some of you may be learning new things, spreading your wings and flying, living on your own for the first time, or starting a business or focusing on career opportunities instead of love. I’m picking up a studio apartment, or getting a room mate and no longer living with your parents. Many some of you broke up with a partner and are living on your own the first time. Some of you may be starting an air bnb business. Or getting more into different side hustles. You’ll be dating your money this year. This year you’ll be feeling stable, self sufficient and abundant. If you’re a service worker you’ll be getting a lot of tips. Money will be stable this year whatever you’ve been doing, it’ll stay the same. I’m not seeing anything changing. You’ll be glowing and looking beautiful as well as feeling better mentally. I’m also hearing you’ll be minding your business this year. I’m hearing the song “Situations” by Dani Leigh. Specifically the line “please don’t make it a scene cause, ive been doing this all my life” and another part where she says “it’s just apart of the lifestyle” I’m also picking up Diamond from players club and the bottle girl that came to comfort her. For the other half of you, some of you may work at a strip club. Some of you may be a stripper, or a bottle girl. Some of you may live in DC, ATL, California, Arizona, and/or Minnesota. You may have a person or love interest in your life that gets insecure over this and needs constant reassurance. I see you continuing to do what you do for work, and you should. Your independence may threaten this person or simply you being around all of the people you’re around for work and them admiring you. Your partner could be sleeping with a relative, cousin, sister or friend/best-friend because of this insecurity or you found this out. For others of you, I’m picking up a tik tok where there was the man and he made a tik tok of “how much my girl made tonight on her first night” she was a stripper and made $200. So, others of you may have a very supportive bf. I’m seeing you doing pole shows for him practicing. Others of you are strippers that had a bf that passed away if so, I’m so sorry my loves. If you’ve been getting an increase in tips this is him and his energy sending you pick me up’s. His name could be Jamal. Malik. He may have liked basketball. Marcel. Keenon. Mike/Micheal, Terrance, Ty. For some they are alive but incarcerated. I’m only picking up this is for people who had boyfriends or baby daddy’s for some that were into things that were risky and dangerous, unfortunately.

For others of you, you have a normal regular boyfriend, I’m picking up they may game a lot , stay home a lot , have a twitch , a game streaming channel , they make their money in a more conventional way; for some they work from home or could be in IT or work at a phone store. They do something for money that involves them staying home a lot so they could make money or the internet, for some they have a phone repair shop or sell tech items to people or repair peoples phone. They could also sell w**d (this isn’t a problem for wherever you guys live, and there’s no drama associated with it or him) or edibles or you all like to bake them together and make love h*gh, you two could like to go to parks together out in nature, and just live a normal slice of life type of lifestyle. If this is you, they support you fully, and have no problem with you stripping. You mind your business, make you money and come home as does he. Some of you have a cousin named Michelle, I’m not sure why that’s popping up but you’ll know why, it may be confirmation of something in your intuition. I’m also hearing whatever you’re wondering the answer is yes surrounding her or a female cousin in general.

For others of you, Some of you could also be baby strippers, meaning you’re new and just started. I’m picking up Ronnie from players club be careful of veterans trying to take you under their wing, I’m also getting trafficking, some of them could be into that. Stay in your lane, mind your business and stick with people that are in the same boat as you not people trying to take you under their wing and “teach” you things. I do see you making a friend out of a coworker. A signifier for her could be ponytails, or pigtails when you meet her she could have a ponytail or high ponytail, or two high pigtails, or low pigtails, or a half up half down style in her hair. I’m getting hoop earrings and a sparkly silver outfit. For some of you this is a trustworthy person, for most of you she could be trouble. A very bubbly person inviting you to places or trips, and it end up being some BS. I’m picking up on a Miami specifically, don’t go to this trip with her. I’m picking up the movie Zola. She could say the trip is for one thing, and it be for another. She could have a boyfriend when you meet her that could end up really being a p*mp and she knows this. She could befriend you to vet you without you knowing. For some this has happened already. For others be weary of this. I’m also seeing a lawsuit come from this, or she could end up owing you money. Or she could end up getting you both arrested. I’m living up Dade County Jail. So be careful, stay t yourself if this is the industry you’re working in. Love doesn’t really come through for this pile for those of you that are single. This pile is half and half. All in all, money will be great, consistent, steady and stable this year. For those of you focusing on that instead of love. Good luck! Pile 2. 💖

♡ 🧸 Pile 3 ♡🧸

• 6 of cups, the world, the sun •

Hi my pile 3 babies! This year in 2025 the energy of your love life is reconciliations and/or new beginnings. I’m hearing begin again by Taylor Swift. You may meet someone new this year that appreciates every little thing your ex didn’t. If your ex never laughed at your jokes, this new person will crack tf up. If your ex hated when you wore certain things, this new person will encourage it and think you are the most beautiful or handsome person in the world. It will shock you at first because you may genuinely have not thought you were funny, or looked cute in certain things because of this toxic ex. Truth is you always were amazing, they just were insecure of your light and beauty; so in an attempt to keep you humble they put you down. I’m also getting they may have made you feel like your p*ssy wasn’t good if you’re a woman. It’s delicious, but they wanted to humble you. This new person will lift you up. Some of your ex’s were abusive in some way, shape or form. Mentally, emotionally, physically etc. This new person will be gentle and kind, very bubbly, emotionally open and available as well. I’m channeling a webtoon series I once read about a man that was in an abusive situation and moved away, and found a woman that is very sweet and kind. I’m also channeling Cassie and her husband after being with Diddy for years. A lot of you will be meeting a new person after a really rough relationship and this could potentially be the one you marry. It may happen very quickly, or right after you’ve broken up and that’s okay. Let it happen. They will make you so happy and suddenly everything you went through to get to this place will feel worth it.

For others, this is a past person coming back to reconcile with you. I’m channeling the movie on Netflix called Time Cut (without the horror). Some of you have broken up with a person and it’s been years. Not only did you break up with them, but it feels like you broke up with your happiness and sunny days too. You both may feel very dry and apathetic without each other. Every day may be just another day without them. You guys may reconnect with one another, and be happy again. You’ll see life in color again. Reconciliation isn’t a bad thing all the time. Some things deserve second chances if both parties are good people at heart, and the relationship made you incredibly happy before it ended. It’s okay to take an ex back if that’s what your heart tells you to do. You all may take an ex back and be really happy. Any kinks will be worked out and this time around with the world card I am seeing it lasting and going all the way this time. You both know what part you all played in the break up and will come together stronger, better and wiser. If it’s wasn’t you and it was all them, they’ve changed completely and permanently. If it was you and not then you’ve changed, they will forgive you and see that. If it was you and you want to reach out, do it. They’re thinking of reaching out to you anyways. I’m hearing easy like Sunday morning, you two are very comfortable with each other. It’s not a comfort zone that is a negative thing but one that should be held on to. Trusting and feeling safe with someone is unfortunately rare in today’s world. Not every comfort zone should be moved on from, just the ones that are keeping you stuck in stagnant negative loops. This isn’t a negative thing but one that brings literal comfort and heals you whenever you’re in each other’s presence. I’m hearing “Nobody Gets Me” by SZA. You all miss each other and may have been the only people to make each other feel understood. There could have been a huge blowout in a hotel room right after sex and one was left there naked. They look back at this with a calmer, more mature viewpoint and feel like they overreacted or they didn’t give you enough grace or vice versa. I’m hearing “It wasn’t that bad” “I was tripping” “F*ck was I thinking” “I don’t even remember what I was mad at” and “It wasn’t even that big of deal” “I do too much” or “You did too much” .

They miss you. For some they want to apologize for somethings that they said. One of you may also realize that someone wasn’t as serious as they made it seem and that they were just young and blew everything out of proportion because of their emotions. Or made a huge scene out in public. For some the woman in this connection was very jealous it could’ve been due to being in love for the first time and being terribly scared of losing her partner to another woman or the man was this way, and maybe got a little aggressive when his jealousy flared. Someone may have punched a hole in the wall. I’m picking up Matt from the real housewives of Atlanta during the beginning seasons when Kenya was dating him. It was perfect for her, she said so his self but he was young and had a temper every time his jealousy flared up. He also said she made him feel unheard, so it could’ve been both parties. I’m also getting the pride and prejudice movie. Maybe both partners were stubborn in some areas. I’m hearing “Skinny Dipping” by Sabrina Carpenter. I feel like this person didn’t know how to control their emotions. It could’ve been the first time they were ever in love. People don’t know how to handle things when they’re experiencing for the first time. It their first time. Or this could’ve been you. For some of you, one or the other wasn’t attracted to what was good for them. You or them could’ve had a great person and sabotaged it all and chose a player because that’s what you were used to and were scared of the real thing, even if this was subconsciously. Trying again with this person may be the best decision you ever make or at-least you think so and they do too. I’m also hearing baked bread, sugar cookies and edibles. So those things may be significant for you. Happy loving pile 3. I’m happy for you! 💖

♡🧸 Pile 4 ♡🧸

• 3 of cups, page of cups •

Hi my pile 4 babies! The energy for you surrounding love in 2025 is playing the field hehe☺️ this year you’ll be connecting and dating multiple people. I’m not seeing you putting people in third party situations, although you might lol; I’m just seeing you having fun. I’m hearing that Y2K song by New Boyz ft Ray J “Ain’t gon tie me down” . Some of you could be millennials fresh out of a long term relationship, but then I’m also picking up some of you are headed to college. I’m picking up on college parties on campus. Be careful, and watch your drinks. Be careful not to over indulge and don’t get drunk/h!gh around anyone you don’t trust or have just met. I see you texting a lot of people, and mistakenly sending the wrong text to the wrong person and then playing it off. I’m also seeing you text your friend group chat with screenshots. Some of you may be in a mix up situation where you and your friend are dealing with the same person. I’m also picking up on a 3some with your friend and the person you’re both interested in for those of you that it doesn’t really matter to you. You won’t be catching any feelings, I’m not picking up on any of your suitors catching feelings either. Just fun experiences.

You don’t or won’t want commitment at this time, you just want to enjoy life and focus on your actual serious goals. I’m hearing “romance can wait” . Love isn’t a priority for some of you right now. I’m picking up on some of you having a plan to focus on romance after something is over. So it feels like most of you are in college, or focusing on a goal first and will play around until the goals are accomplished. I’m seeing a road trip to a college campus. Some of you are attending Howard University in DC. Some of you are headed to UCLA. Some of you are going to a college specifically in Atlanta, I’m hearing Morehouse. I’m hearing business communications, or a major with something to do with media, theatre, communications, or business. Some of you are studying to be speech pathologists. Or have dreams of doing broadway. 🎭 Or being a radio show host, podcaster, news broadcaster or a celebrity gossip journalist. Some of you want to be a journalist that does interviews like the hosts of reality tv show reunions, or someone that interviews celebrities on red carpets, or have a show like the chicken shop date on youtube; or have a YouTube channel that interviews celebrity guests. Some of you want to write books or screenplays or movie scripts. Or possibly build a media company like the shade room centered around spilling tea. Some of you are secretly running tea pages on Instagram, keep at it, it’ll blow up. Some of you love blind items, and are starting a blind items page on IG or tik tok. Some of you love lipstick alley and Reddit. I’m hearing “that’s where I get my tea” lol. Keep at it. You’ll be successful. Others of you have content pages on the internet that you run secretly or that hide your face that might not be about tea, but it could be about whatever your niche is. It’s doing well, going to do well and/or will continue to do well this year. Also if you aren’t in college the states I just mentioned could simply be where you live. This is a love reading and career is coming through which is a confirmation that love isn’t your focus, hence why you are just having fun.

But all in all you’ll make good friends, and have a lot of spicy interactions with people you’re choosing to be FWB with. I’m seeing specifically you might have a consistent person you make an agreement with and that will be your one and only consistent sex partner. You both will follow the rules and not catch feelings, although it will be very hard to stop having secs with each other. You may practice as well and gain lots of experience from secs with this person. You may feel really comfortable with this person. This may go on for a very long time, even if one of you do get into a relationship I’m seeing you both continuing to sleep with one another. The boy in this scenario may get into a relationship but will still sleep with you or whomever the girl is in this situation. I’m picking up pregnancy, so be careful if that’s not what you’re looking for. Use protection. Some of you may start an only fans that hides your face with a FWB.

For those of you that may have a 3some with your friends it will be absolutely disgusting (in a positive way for you) you two will be sucking a lollipop together at the same time (if you get it). Also the two people of the same gender will continue to sleep with one another secretly. I’m picking up the two same gender people are women. I’m picking up A LOT of friends with benefits situations. It will all be safe and consensual. No one is sleeping with multiple people at the same time. Just simple exclusive friends with benefits. Also some of you are already in college and you’re a woman who has a woman best friend and you two are sleeping with each other secretly, you two may share a dorm, or an apartment; I’m picking up when the guest leaves, y’all get nasty sometimes whenever you’re under the influence of alcohol or weed, or when you two have movie nights it ends spicy, or some of you smoke with your best friend and then f*ck, some of you hot box the car and then get spicy in it. I’m picking up on late parked car convos about boys or something else and then spicy sessions afterwards. I’m picking up the LGBTQ+ term bestie like those Twitter pages for the gworlz. Even if you’re not in college and just a regular gown woman, I’m still picking up this is what you do with one of your homegirls. I’m picking up that everytime you two go over each others houses you end up being intimate.

You may have one of those secret besties. Or if you don’t have one already, and you’ve been wanting one, this year you’ll find one at work or at school or the internet. I’m picking up the app Taimi and HER. Also some of you will connect and find your bestie through the literal comment section of p*rnhub, or a Twitter page, or a spicy group chat for girls. A lot of girl and feminine energy for this pile. Tr*bbing is significant and also a rose toy is significant. If this is already happening, this year it will simply be the same routine and nothing changing lol. Lastly I’m picking up for a lot of you who are or will be in friends with benefits situations this isn’t going to stop when one ventures off in the future to be in a relationship. This goes for all gender pairings. It may be a situation where you all are intimate for years down to the day before someone’s wedding in a one last time kind of way. I’m hearing last time by Giveon, along with Last Time by Trey Songz, I’m also hearing F.U.C.K by Victoria Monet. Someone here’s favorite color is blue. Yours or theirs. For some, you may have a baby with your friends with benefits in the future, and it’ll be a BM/BD situation where you both don’t have feelings for each other but will always have sex no matter what relationship you’re in. You two will never deny each other sex. Any intimate encounters for this pile this year will be addictive and too good to stop. Or if you’re already doing this, this year it’ll be the same way. Some of you are already doing this and have a good thing going and just wanna check in on it, I’m here to say it’ll be the same, nothing negative will disturb it.

One more thing for this pile is for women specifically some of you are looking for a woman bestfriend that you can do dr*gs with; specifically shrooms. Men aren’t into those things usually and even if they are, you specifically want a woman friend that you can smoke with, do shrooms with & maybe experiment with others dr*gs as well. You want to watch movies with this friend, you want a friend you can trust, and be yourself with. You may have to always act a certain way maybe nice when you aren’t nice all the time, or you have to keep your opinions to yourself, you may not be as friendly as you feel like you have to pretend to be. You want a friend that won’t tell your business, copy you or be jealous of you in anyway. Someone who is like minded or into the weird stuff you’re into. You also want to sleep with this person and it be cool the next day. You want a friend you can get attached to and do everything with. You also want a friend that you can vent to the way you let people vent to you. You may also have issues with your dad you want to vent to someone about, or an absent mom. Again, you want to sleep with this person and try things with this person. You fantasize about having a bf and then visiting her house and having a smoke sessions and secs and then going back home. This represents something special and close to you. You would be very possessive over this persons friendship and possible cut your other friends off maybe they weren’t fulfilling you anyone and this persons genuine friendship encourages you to walk away from other peoples fake friendship. Some of you already have a bestfriend that’s a Libra or Cancer and she isn’t any good. You have in the back of your mind the moment you find a good friend you’ll cut everyone off. This person talks about you behind your back anyway specifically the relationships you get she may even judge you, or call you stupid. You are looking for a bestie that doesn’t do that, because you feel like you don’t do that others. I’m seeing that you don’t. Again im picking up this is a woman looking for a woman best friend. In the eastern parts of the world they call this type of friendships “intimate friends” where you are platonically friends and sleep with each other from time to time. I’m picking up you will find that friend this year. A lot of you may find them over the internet for a lot of you. I’m picking up that you’re shy and that’s the best way, others of you may find them at work or school. I’m picking up the internet. This may change the direction you go in your life. You all may build your lives around each other and also choose to live in a communal way meaning raise children together, or one day move close to each other. For some you may get matching tattoos, others you may move overseas together may both of you have always wanted to do this. I’m picking up a London. Im channeling the YouTubers “Rose and Rosie” . This best friend could be a Gemini or have placements in their chart in Gemini. Also Rose and Rosie are both the same signs. So you and this friend could be the same signs or have similar birth charts. I’m also getting that you two could have the same placements but in different places. Your sun could be their moon, or vice versa. You could be doing something in the media together. A YouTube channel, or podcast, or only fans something. If you’re spiritual or witchy you could be lighting a pink candle to draw this in. I’m hearing you literally affirm and pray over the candle for genuine platonic love or real love and friendship. I’m seeing a blue candle as well. You both could suffer from depression. This friendship will aid this. You both may spend time in nature. I’m doing someone move to Atlanta, or California for this friendship. You all may change the course of your life because of this friendship. I’m also seeing y’all delete your social medias lol. Maybe you both are forcing yourselves to be extroverted because you are looking for one another and once you find each other you’ll duck off.

Cherish this friendship or relationship because it might turn into that. But for most it’s just a soulmate friendship. Both of you deserve it! Also you two might live out of a van together. Or move overseas specifically to London and live out of a van together or this something you want to do. I’m channeling the YouTube channel “Bus of with Josie” . You or them or both could love the color Pink or Green. I’m channeling Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande’s friendship. You both like the same things. They both love Harry Potter and Broadway. They cry all the time together and are very quirky and weird together, also very emotionally available. One of you is more grounded, and strong the other is more soft and often in distress or type of person that will call you at 3am because they’re favorite character dies in the movie and you thought it was something serious but it’s very serious to them. You two may fall asleep on the phone together or FaceTime often. This may be a long distance friendship at first. One or both of you may be struggling and will choose to migrate to the other to live together. This will be a friendship that does not keep record of favors. You’ll let each other borrow money etc. I’m strongly getting a move to another country together. London is VERY significant. Some of you could be living in hotels or they could be. You won’t judge each other, I’m seeing you guys come up with a plan to live together. California could be significant as well. I’m also seeing some of you send money to the other or to each other. Signifiers could be french tips, or they could love french tips whether square or almond, chrome or pear nails, short hard gel manicures they do at home. They love doing their nails so they do it themselves if they need to save money. I’m hearing specs they could wear glasses, have mini twist or thick coily hair. Im seeing a thick fluffy high ponytail huff. They could be brown/dark-skin. One of you could have curly hair. I’m picking up the name Jasmine or a name that starts with an S or sounds like an S when you pronounce it. This could be your names or theirs. I’m hearing “Sierra Leone” by Frank Ocean. So their name could be Sierra. Someone could be named Michelle or have in their/your name, I’m channeling for some Michelle could be your middle name. Someone could be Spanish or have Spanish in them, I’m seeing the Japanese straw hat that Jhene Aiko wears so some of you or them could be mixed with Japanese, because I’m hearing Jhene’s last name Chilombo.

Some of you could be Japanese of love Jhene Aiko, you could both love her. You could be Blasian. Some of you could be Chinese, or from China or have that name. Or your name could be a country. This friend could be African. She may live white nails or always have it on her toes. Or you do it. I’m channeling Jhene’s sister Miyoko who is always wearing purple and has it in her hair. This person may wear oversized colorful sweaters or cardigans she may love lilac, purple and pink. M names could be significant as well, H or R. If this same sex situation turns into a relationship your father may not approve. You may end up going no contact with this parent and it’s for the best. I’m picking up a misogynistic oppressive energy from him. This could be a regular love situation but I am specifically getting this if for women or a woman looking for a woman best friend. Some of you I’m getting wouldn’t care so much if you had a really intimate best friend situation but for some women may have acted weird towards you in the past and still do. This one won’t. You may hold on to her for dear life. If this isn’t G/G and men are reading this some of you wouldn’t be out and about so much if you had exactly what you’re looking for but again, I’m picking up for most this is a specific G/G situation where a woman is craving a best friend, that she can be friends with benefits with. So take it how it fits, it will fit differently for all. If you are a woman feeling like this you may struggle with desiring this bc of a strict moral compass that may be instilled in you from a strict father and/or a judgmental mother. Some of you wouldn’t care what your man did if you had a best friend that you could talk to, lean on, so fun things with and sleep with. That’s what’s I’m picking up on.

Others of you could be male and want a gf. You don’t care much about friends and wouldn’t if you had a gf but people will call you a simp. None of that matters, everyone should do what feels right in their heart. Anyways, you will find this, this year. Whatever scenario that fits is what you’ll find this year. A wish will come true surrounding this. If you already have this male or female, then this is just saying all of this will be maintained this year, nothing negative will impact this it’ll be the same thing as this year, fulfilling and steady. 🌸 That’s all I’m picking up on for love in this pile. Good luck pile 4, you have consistent fun times ahead of you! 💖

[scribblesofagoonerr]

For what it's worth, I'm sorry and I don't really hate you | Inner Demons

⟫ Alphabet Challenge, F - For what it's worth, I'm sorry and I don't really hate you

Pairings: leah williamson x teen reader, arsenal wfc x teen reader

Hello, I'm back with part 6. Sorry it's been a bit of a wait, life gets in the way and makes it hard to write, but here's the next part. I honestly don't know how many chapters this will have because I'm really enjoying writing it, so hey ho, I might even just make this one small fic series of many ideas' I currently have in my head :)

I don't know if this chapter does make much sense at all and non of it's been proof read again, so it could be a bit all over the place but please let me know what you think!

Thank you for all the ongoing support so far, it's overwhelming to see how much that you all love this, and it gives me motivation to continue to write!

My asks are open for anyone to drop me an any ideas' on this fic or anything else that people would like to see be written, however, I am only comfortable writing anything platonic though :)

You're progressing well to get better and you're slowly returning to usual happy, self chaotic self.

TW: angst and mentions of SH, MH, suicide and death.

"So, what's the food in this place like then?" Kyra broke the silence in the room, where all the girls were all crowded in as they came to visit you in the pysch ward of the hospital during the visiting hours.

It had been 46 hours since you had been detained, 46 hours since you all but shouted at Leah that you hated her.

You really did regret it.

You didn't actually mean that though, and you had been feeling terrible about it ever since the words escaped your mouth.

"Seriously, Kyra?" Steph stares at the younger Australian in disbelief.

"What? I'm just trying to make conversation here" Kyra replies, shrugging her shoulders.

Caitlin can't help but snort. "And you decide to start with asking what the foods' like?" she teases the twenty-one-year-old.

"Yeah, cos' I've heard that hopsital food is disgusting and all" Kyra remarks to the older girl, sticking her tongue out at her.

"Very mature" Steph rolls her eyes at the two of them.

"So, what is the food like then?" Vic asks, peeking interest to know the answer.

"Terrible, I think that even Leahs' cooking might be better than what they're serving on the menu here" You can't help but grin cheekily.

"Ouch it must be bad then" Beth joins in with the joke.

"You'd better not let her hear you say outloud or I think she'd been offended" Viv tells you as she can't help but smile slightly, just happy to see you slowly returning to your old self.

"So, she didn't come with you guys then?" You ask as you pull at the sleeves of the hoodie you currently had on.

You don't miss the look that all the girls share with one another. You weren't an idiot to know something was going on.

"Just tell me what's going on" You stare at them all, trying to get an answer out of them.

"She's outside in the waiting room with Lia" Jen admits, exhaling a sigh.

"Oh" Your smile falters at the disappointing news.

"She wanted to come in with us Y/N but it was hard for her" Beth explains on behlf of the blonde, who you miss terribley. "I'm sure when she's ready, she'll come and see you" she adds, trying to keep the hope alive.

You really had messed up with what you said, you doubt that she would want to visit you, nor would she want you to come back to the flat where you lived with her.

"Oh uh, well then that's okay I guess, I mean I don't blame her for not coming cos' what I said was horrible and stuff" You make up an excuse as you find sudden interest with the floor beneath you.

"It's not your fault for being angry, Y/N" Katie pats you on the shoulder.

"How're you feeling now?" Alessia asks, concerned as a way to try and change the subject.

"Is this your way of subtly asking me if I'm going to try and attempt to kill myself again?" You glance around at all of the girls' faces in the room.

"Y/N" Kim shoots you a disapproving look.

"The answers no by the way" You mumble quietly.

"Y/N" Kim repeats again, a bit louder.

"What? You know I like to make dark humour jokes in this type of situation. It's just a coping mechanism" You tell your captain as you hold your hands up in mock-surrender, who continues to look at you with a certain look that makes you back down straightaway. "Alright, okay, I'll tone it down with the death jokes" You mumble, slouching further down in your seat.

"How's she been doing?" Leah stands in the reception area of the hospital and fumbles with her hands, as she speaks to one of the doctors.

"Y/N has making good progress. I think another day or so and she'll be ready to come home" The doctor explains with a kind smile.

"That's great news" Lia says, smiling as she glances at the blonde for her reaction.

Leahs' eyes widen in surprise and smiles slightly. "Yeah, that's good to hear. I'm proud of her making so much progress in such a short space of time" she tells the doctor.

"It is, Y/N/N has really thrown herself into trying to get better, the therapy sessions seem to be going well too" The doctor tells them honestly. "Are you going to go and see her? I'm sure that she'd love to see you" she adds.

The blondes feels apprehensive, her eyes dart over in the direction of where the doors led to the psych ward, where you would be with the rest of the girls that had all visited.

Leah had wanted to as well, she just couldn't find the courage to actually take the steps and dipped out at the last minute.

"I hate you, Leah" The words that you shouted at her, played in her head on a constant loop.

"Uh, I don't know about that. I'm not sure if she's going to want to see me" Leah confesses, shoving her hands in her pockets.

"Le, you don't know that" Lia squeezes the blondes' shoulder gently as she tries to reassure her.

"I know that she hates me, Wally. You heard what she said before" Leah replies quietly, shaking her head as she takes another glance towards the doors.

"You know that she didn't mean that, Le. You know she is just a kid with a lot of feelings sometimes" Lia tells the blonde, smiling at her.

Leah looks a bit more apprehensive as she shakes her head. "There was so much hatred in her voice when she said, it felt like she did mean it" she disagrees with her.

"She was angry the other day though, Le and you even said that yourself" Lia reminds the younger girl.

Leah hums as she bites her bottom lip "But what if she doesn't want to see me? I know she's going to be angry with me for leaving her here in this place" she admits to the older girl.

"She's been asking for you every day since she has been here" The doctor pipes in, gently smiling at the two girls.

"Really?" Leah asks, blinking in slight surprise.

"Yes, Y/N has told me about the visits from all of the girls but the only person she mentioned that she actually wants to see is you, Leah" The doctor tells the blonde.

"See?" Lia smiles at Leah and sqeeuzes her shoulder. "I told you that I don't think Y/N could ever hate you or be angry, you know that, Le" she insists.

"I know" Leah bites her bottom lip anxiously, taking another glance at the door ahead. "I just can't help but feel horrible for making the decision and I'm weary incase she resents me for it" she admits, quietly.

The doctor frowns at them both. "I know it must have been hard to be the one to make that call but it was for the right one to give her the best possible chance to get better" They explain.

"You shouldn't be blaming yourself for this, Le. It's what was needed" Lia repeats the doctors words, so to speak.

"Yeah, yeah I know" Leah admits, pulling at the sleeves of her hoodie that she had on.

"You're nervous to see her?" The doctor asks, making the brief observation.

Leah can't help but snort slightly. "That obvious?" she jokes.

"I've been in this job for a while now, it's easy enough to pick up on things like this" The doctor chuckles amusedly. "Regardless of what may have been said, I have a feeling that Y/N will be happy enough to see you" They add in.

"SNAP" You scream loudly as you slam your hand down on the deck of cards that are on the table. "HA! I win!" You cheer in glee.

Kyra let's out a irritated huff while she glares at you. "Why are you so vicious with this game?" she asks.

"I want to win" You smirk and stick your tongue out at her, pulling the deck of cards towards you.

"Kyra, you're literally losing a child" Vic chips in, watching the game amusedly.

"Said child is a menace" Kyra mumbles as she pouts.

"Sucks to be a loser" You can't help but quip as you reshuffle the deck of cards in your hand.

"Room for a couple more visitors?" Leah pokes her head round the door and braces herself for your initial reaction to seeing her.

"LE!" You dart up from your seat and run to the blonde, abandoning the game of cards completely.

All feelings of anger had been swept aside as you were just happy to see her in the room. You thought you'd blown it when you told her that you hated her.

"Hi bubs" Leah instantly embraces you in her arms and kisses the top of your hair. "I've missed you, Y/N/N. I'm so sorry I haven't been to visit you" she apologises.

"S' okay, you're here now" You mumble, burying her head in her chest as you refuse to let go off her.

"Oi I'm here too, you know" Lia jokes playfully, knowing that you would want that moment with just the blonde.

"Yeah, yeah. Hi Wally" You grin cheekily at the older girl before you turn back towards the older blonde girl. "I'm sorry for what I said cos' I didn't mean what I said about hating you, I was angry and upset and I really don't hate you I promise!" You tell her honestly.

"It's okay bubs, I know you were upset and didn't mean it" Leah smiles as she squeezes you a bit more tighter than before, being careful in case she caught any of your bandages on your arms.

Moving to sit down on the now vacant chair, Leah plonks you down on her lap as she keeps her arms wrapped around you tightly since it was apparent you weren't going to let go any time soon but she was okay with how clingy you was after she hadn't seen you in a few days.

"Whats' been going on here then?" Lia looks towards the game that was previously being played.

"We were playing cards, but Kyras' being proper salty because she's loosing now" You grin, sticking your tongue out at the Australian girl.

"How do you even loose at that game?" Steph wonders.

"I didn't know you could even loose at snap" Beth chuckles, amusedly.

"Apparently so" Jen jokes, joining in with the two of them.

Leah can't help but laugh amusedly as she runs her fingers through your hair. "The doctor said that you're making good progress" she tells you.

"Mhm" You mumble, resting your head on her shoulder.

"That's good news!" Vic overhears the conversation as she smiles at you.

"Yeah, that means you'll be able to come home soon enough" Alessia pipes in.

Katie can't help but scoff. "She should've never been here in the first place" she sneers in the direction where Leah is sat.

"Katie" Kim glares at the Irish girl.

"What? It's true!" Katie exclaims in outrage, not backing down from glaring at the blonde. "You and I both know it, we all do! She should've never been here, she should have been at home with people that care about her" she insists.

"It's what was best for her" Leah fires back just as quick.

"Was it?" Katie scowls at her.

"Can you guys please not talk about me like I'm not in the room?" You huff and glance between the two older girls.

"Sorry kid" Katie apologises.

"Sorry bubs" Leah apologises.

"Hey, Y/N/N, it'll be good that you're getting out of hospital soon enough now" Kyra slyly grins at you, looking forward to the pair of you being able to cause mischief in no time.

"Yeah, partners in crime reunited again" You grin at the Aussie girl.

"No, no! Absolutely not!" Steph protests, shaking her head. "It took me at least a week to get the ketchup of the ceiling after the last stunt that you two idiots pulled" She adds.

"I don't know what you're talking about" You try to act innocent as you slyly smirk at Kyra.

"Oh, really? So the baking soda just happened to find it's way inside the ketchup bottle, did it?" Steph narrows her eyes' in the direction of the two of you.

"Maybe" Kyra can't help the shit eating grin on her face.

"I know that look, the pair of you are definitely going to be up to no good" Viv shakes her head.

Jen chuckles in amusement. "You two willl definitely be under a careful watch now incase the next prank gets out of hand" She notes.

"Sure, cos' I'm not going to already be watched like a hawk now anyways, right?" You remark sarcastically, peering up at the older blonde.

"What do you think?" Leah replies back, raising one of her eyebrows.

"You can relax, Le. I'm not going to attempt to kill myself again any time soon" You joke, not realising that now probably isn't the best time to make any type of comment like that.

"Y/N" Kim and Leah both scold you at the same time.

You huff when you realise the pair of them are already ganging up on you and remember that being the baby of the team definitely sucks sometimes.

"What? I'm just saying, I'm not gonna, well unless Leah attempts to try and cook dinner again then it's an easy way out-- Ow! What the fuck?" You continue to make jokes about the situation at hand, jolting in shock when you feel a light pinch on your thigh from said blonde you are sat on.

"Language" Leah states sternly, giving you one of her famous glares.

"That was mean of you to do that! Too soon to make jokes about it then?" You pout and rub your thigh to try and relieve some of the pain. "Yep got it" You add, smiling innocently at the blonde.

"So, I thought you weren't going to come in because it was hard for you?" Katie scoffs at the blonde, deciding to bring the subject up now that you were out of the room, having gone to grab a drink with Jen, Steph and Beth.

"Katie" Viv glances at Katie and exhales a sigh.

"It has been hard Katie" Leah admits, biting her bottom lip.

Katie scoffs again. "Oh? I'm sorry, I'm sure it must have been so hard for you, Leah" she deadpans.

"You don't know how hard it has been, Katie!" Leah shouts loud around the room, attracting a few looks in her direction.

"Wonderful" Steph speaks up first, exhaling a sigh.

"Not again" Beth mumbles, shaking her head.

"They're fighting again, aren't they?" You huff as you walk back towards the room with Jen as you can hear the raised voices from the two girls, who weren't seeing eye to eye now

"I think so" Jen agrees.

"Fantastic" You mumble, slowly walking back into the room.

"Oh? And how do you think it's been for Y/N/N? You made the decision to keep her in here!" Katie continues to argue with the blonde, not afraid to be open about her feelings. "You haven't even visited her once while she's been here" she adds.

The Irish girl really hadn't been happy with the whole decision that had been made but there was nothing that she could do herself to stop it from happening.

It had left a tense atmosphere between the two girls and they'd shared a few cross words ever since.

"It wasn't my choice Katie!" Leah insists, continuing to argue with the fiesty Irish girl.

Katie couldn't help but scoff and roll her eyes. "Sure, but you could have said something to stop it!" she fires back at the blonde, not willing to back down from the argument just yet.

"Girls lets' not do this here" Kim looks between the two of them as she notices you walk back into the room with the older girls.

"Katie, come on, just leave it" Caitlin takes a hold of the girls' hand to try and calm her down.

However, neither of the girls were willing to back down just yet.

They were both just as stubborn as one another sometimes.

"The doctors thought it was best since Y/N/N--" Leahs' words were cut off by you, walking in right at that moment.

"Tried to kill myself, I tried to end my life, and it would have worked if Leah hadn't ran in and stopped me, so everyone thinks keeping me locked up in here it will help to keep me safe"

The room is suddenly so silent that you could hear a pin drop.

Whoops?

"Hey, at least the therapy is somehow helping to help me express my feelings now. Yay" You deadpan, plonking yourself back down on Leahs' lap as you rip open the packet of Haribo Tangfastics you had brought from the hospital shop. "So, does anyone want a sweet?" You offer, like you hadn't just said what you did.

[icarusflewsworld]

Rhysand & Cassian & Azriel X OC

Hello, here is the chapter 23 of a fanfiction on the world of Acotar where our three favorite Batboys are the mates of a single woman.

TW for this chapters : Violence, blood, vomit. Be careful to what you read not to put yourself in a bad mood. Take care of yourself. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

I hope you'll enjoyed the chapters ! Don't hesitate to tell me what you think about it, please ! Also, I am apologizing again for the late. 

I have exams coming so I think I will not be able to post more than once a week but I will try my best ! The next chapter or chapters will be out on Friday, January 10 ! 

! Don't forget to read the previous chapters ! : Here

Love you all ! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Chapter 23

After what seemed like long minutes, Luxiana was finally regaining sensation and control over her senses. "That was incredible," she managed to articulate in a tired voice even inside her skull.

The smiles of the three Illyrians reappeared as they cast tender glances at her. "I want to do it again," she added suddenly with a cute pout. The dark-haired Illyrians lost their smile. Azriel grunted through clenched teeth. He thought she was perfect. Cassian looked up at the ceilling, trying to keep his excitement from exploding. But Rhysand didn't even try to stop what he felt, way too much aroused by what just happened with their mate. He got to his feet, dragging Luxiana with him.

He wanted to wear her, but he couldn't. Not here, not in front of these Fae. If they suspected that he liked Luxiana, they might come after her, and she was only a fragile human. He didn't want to take that risk. He placed her gently on her feet. "Can you walk?" he asked her worriedly.

Luxiana nodded with a gentle smile.

"Great," added Cassian with a seductive air but rapid breathing, "because we're going to have to run to a room so we can make you something a little more... better."

Azriel grabbed Luxiana by the hand to pull her towards the door, and Rhysand and Cassian followed. "We have to leave," Rhys simply justified to the Fae present and to Mor's father.

Keir, feeling unrespected, wasted no time in replying with a grimace of disgust aimed at Rhys. "I didn't expect anything else anyway, you seemed to have a pronounced taste for fucking instead of taking care of your court like the whore you are."

The four of them froze a few steps in front of Mor's father.

Azriel and Cassian were boiling with anger. How dare that filthy rat talk about their brother like that after he had sacrificed himself to save his court. Cassian took a threatening step towards Keir, ready to fight, but Rhysand raised his hand to stop him.

The high lord, though electrocuted t by a mixture of anger, guilt and bad memories tried to keep a cool head. "Let's calm down, it's nothing. It doesn't matter, we mustn't let them understand that it does," he thought to calm them.

Cassian didn't move any further, although he was dying to. Rhysand gave Keir a dark look of warning. "That's because this court isn't worth it. But don't forget who you're talking to Keir, next time you open your mouth without permission, I'll shut it."

Keir gritted his teeth but nodded in resignation before lowering his head.

Rhysand moved to get around him, but Luxiana grabbed him by the arm to stop him. Rhysand turned to face her. Her eyes were wide and her brows furrowed, but a burning rage smoked inside her pupils with such violence that the three Illyrians recoiled at the sight. "Aren't you going to do anything? Are you going to let him talk to you like that?" she asked, almost shouting into Rhys's head.

Rhysant was at first pleased for a second that she felt such anger for him before pulling himself together and replying. "It doesn't matter."

Luxiana released him, dropping her arm limply to her side and lifting her chin. "It does to me." Rhysand widened his eyes but had no time to say anything as Luxiana added, "I guess I'll have to do something myself then."

Without anyone being able to do anything about it, and with lightning speed, Luxiana grabbed Truth Teller out of his scabbard on Azriel's thigh. Then, in the blink of an eye, she stood in front of Keir to thrust her hand into his mouth, grab his tongue, pull it out and slice it at the base with a sharp, precise stab.

Mor's father - who had barely had time to take a step backwards and raise his hands to stop Luxiana - widened his eyes, screaming his head off in pain as he fell to his knees on the floor.

The three Illyrians hiccupped in surprise as they reflexively took a step forward towards Luxiana to protect her, but stopped mid-stride, opening their mouths and eyes wide. They were paralyzed with shock as their pupils focused on their mate, who held Keir's tongue at the top of her fingertips.

A general exclamation of surprise went up in the assembly of Fae, most of whom were clapping their hands over their mouths in fright.

What Luxiana thought was Mor's mother ran closer, shouting Keir's name. Luxiana raised the knife towards her, giving her a cold, creepy look that immobilized the fae from head to toe. "Come any closer and I'll cut your tongue out next."

Mor's mother cast a horrified glance at Rhysand. "Are you going to let her do this?

Rhysand didn't even calculate her, far too surprised by his soulmate's cold, psychopathic expression. He'd never seen her like this and he hadn't even considered for a second that she could do this. Their sweet Luxiana. He blinked several times to compose himself, but the blonde moved.

She tilted her head with a smile, making her look even crazier. "Who do you think gave me the order to do this? I'm only the executor of your lord's orders. So the next time, chew your words before you disrespect Rhysand." Another hiccup of surprise echoed through the room.

The three Illyrians, if that was possible, widened their eyes even more. She'd just said Rhys was controlling her. She was doing all this to save his honor. They couldn't believe it. They couldn't even think straight.

Luxiana laughed wildly. "By the way," she leaned forward towards Keir to run her index and middle fingers under his chin in an attempt to raise his head. The fae glared darkly at her first, then became white as he saw the cold pupils filled with power of the blonde. "You didn't chew your words enough before you spoke..." She brought the tip of Keir's tongue up to his nose. "You must fix that, right ?" She let go of his chin to stand up and vulgarly throw her tongue tip in front of him. "Chew!" she ordered curtly.

"What?" shouted Mor's mother as she took a step forward, but an umpteenth cold look from Luxiana dissuaded her from continuing.

Luxiana returned her eyes to Keir to look at him. "I said chew you fucking tongue and don't make me repeat myself."

A gleam of rage exploded in the fae's eyes. He deployed his power to shatter that pitiful human's neck, but he couldn't do it. His power wasn't working. His power was completely stuck, as if completely asleep. He glanced at his lord. Had he blocked his powers? Yet Rhysand didn't even look at him, just stared at the blonde strangely. Keir wanted to destroy this human. He jumped to his feet, screaming strangely, to throw himself, hand first, at her and snap her neck with his own fingers.

Rhysand, Cassian and Azriel managed to take their eyes off their mate to put them on Keir and when they saw him rise to his feet and lunge at Luxiana, they gasped. The three of them were about to intervene, but before they'd even had time to move a muscle, their Luxiana grabbed one of Keir's wrists, went underneath and went behind him. She gave a swift, sharp kick to his bent knee, forcing him to fall to the ground. Using her grip on his wrist, she pulled him backwards, catched him by the shoulder to deliver a shin kick to his arm, which snapped in two with a horrible sound. Two pieces of bone ended up going out from the skin of the fae's arm, which had taken on an odd angle.

The three Illyrians recoiled in disbelief. What she had just done was a professional fighting technique.

Keir screamed, but Luxiana wasn't done yet -without letting go of his wrist- she grabbed the piece of tongue on the floor and swung it into the mouth of the fae, who cried out in pain with his eyes closed.

Feeling his own tongue in his mouth, the fae widened his eyes and wanted to spit it out, but Luxiana pressed her palm against his jaw to close it savagely and snap his teeth. She locked his lips with her hand while keeping his jaws closed with her index finger and thumb under his chin.

When Keir tried to move and struggle, Luxiana's grip on his wrist twisted his arm a little more, awakening the pain of his broken bone. "Keep moving and I'll break the other arm."

The fae stood still, trembling with fear. Luxiana smiled creepily. "Good, now, chew!" Her voice was cold and filled with disgust and hatred.

The three Illyrians didn't recognize her. 

Azriel was so shocked that he didn't know what to do or how to react. Had she really just done that? Was she really doing this?

Rhysand’s heart was pounding hardly in his chest. The way she talks coldly. The way she seemed so powerful and confident. She was incredibly hot.

Cassian took a step to the side to get a better look at his soulmate's face -on which Keir's red cell had splattered- and his blood migrated back to his penis. She was incredibly sexy. Her gaze was cold, sure, authoritative. She looked strong and powerful. Cassian's eyes lit up and his heart began to beat with admiration in his chest. No, not admiration, love.

Keir pleaded with his eyes, shaking his head in the negative. This answer did not please Luxiana who straightened up and suddenly kicked his forearm with her foot, breaking the bone there this time. The fae screamed as loud as he could with Luxiana's hand over his mouth. "I said chew,"she repeated.

Keir began to cry, trembling all over as he began to chew his own tongue. He vomited several times into his mouth, but he couldn't let anything out because of the blonde's hand clamped to his lips. "Good boy," she smiled. "Now swallow."

Keir swallowed his tongue with difficulty, his body shaking with the contractions of his stomach. Luxiana couldn't hide her smile at the satisfaction she felt. After waiting for a few seconds for his tongue to fall down entirely into his stomach, she released him.

Keir bent over to puke out all his guts, almost choking on his own vomit.

Luxiana took a step back, detailing him from her height. Then when he finished, she grabbed his hair to lift his head toward her. "You'll never disrespect your lord again, will you?"

He nodded in confirmation, tears rolling down his cheeks. Luxiana released him abruptly before straightening up to spin around and shoot all the other faes present with her pupils. "Does anyone have anything else to say about Rhysand?"

They all shook their heads and took several steps backwards. Then, all at once, Luxiana lost her cold, dark and crazy expression. "Great then," she jumped out of joy, smiling sweetly and innocently. She ran slowly towards Azriel -still motionless- to replace Truth Teller in its scabbard. Then she turned to Rhysand to wrap her arms on one of his and pull him out.

Cassian detailed Keir's bleeding body on the floor, grinning through his teeth. He glanced back at Luixiana, who was leading Rhysand to the door. "Woah," he managed to say in their minds. Then he began to follow her cheerfully.

Azriel followed them, walking robotically, staring into space. What had just happened?

They left the room and after a few minutes of walking, Rhysand blinked to compose himself. Realizing everything, he paralyzed, coming to a standstill in one of the long corridors. "What just happened?" he shouted breathlessly, lowering his pupils to Luxiana.

Luxiana wanted to continue pulling Rhysand but he stopped moving and she could feel the other two stop just behind them, giving her the same shocked look that burned her skin. She closed her eyes fiercely as she let go of Rhysand and gritted her teeth. "I'm not going to apologize, okay?" she shouted a little angrily.

She let go of Rhys to take a few steps forward, turning towards them and positioning herself in front of them. She crossed her arms, glowering at the lord. "You're the high lord of the night court, you can't let someone disrespect you like that!"

Rhysand widened his eyes again but Luxiana continued. "You may consider yourself mature and reasonable and kind enough not to react but not me dammit. I'm the exact opposite of that and there was no way I was going to let anyone talk to you like that, Rhys, not after what you've been through under the mountain!"

The blonde, seeing Rhys's surprised expression, thought it was sadness shining in his pupils. She huffed as she calmed down, feeling suddenly guilty and showing it on her face. She made an adorable pout that made the Illyrians hallucinate. Her face was so childlike and different from the one she'd had a few seconds ago in the throne room.

"I'm sorry," she finally mumbled, lowering her eyes as she juggled from one foot to the other. "It's just that I told you I'd protect you and not let anyone talk bad about you since you saved Feyre under the mountain and now I want to protect you too because I like you and I know I couldn't keep my cool but I was so..."

Something exploded in Rhysand's chest, sending vibrations of joy throughout his being and even warming his eyes. He didn't even let her finish her sentence as he cupped his soulmate's face to raise her head to him. "What did you just say?"

Luxiana accentuated her guilty pout when she saw Rhysand's even brighter eyes. She'd hurt him and she didn't mean to. "I said I was sorry and that..."

Rhysand shook his head to interrupt. "No, you said you liked me!"

Luxiana pursed her lips, drawing out her dimples. She looked away for a second, blushing. "Yes.. Why ?" she admitted, not understanding why he was asking her that. Was he going to make fun of her?

Rhysand let out a delighted laugh in one breath before throwing himself on Luxiana to kiss her full on the lips. Luxiana, not expecting it, hiccuped in surprise as she allowed Rhysand to put his tongue into her mouth. She didn't wait to return his kiss, which tickled her to the core.

Rhysand pulled away from her to stare at her with a big smile and eyes shining with playfulness and confidence. "So you like me." Rhysand wanted to jump for joy.

Luxiana bit her tongue as she backed away from his grip and gave him a jaded look.

Azriel came back to reality, shaking his head, his eyes still wide. "Does it surprise anyone but me that she just cut out Keir's tongue and fed it to him after breaking his arm?" he shouted in total shock.

"No, it surprised me too," Cassian said seriously, crossing his arms and then glaring at Luxiana. "But damn, that was sexy."

Luxiana laughed, lowering her head to hide her cheeks. Why was she blushing so much with them?

Azriel moves around Rhys to stand in front of Luxiana. He caught her chin between his thumb and forefinger to plunge a serious, wary gaze into his soul mate's. "How did you do that? You just made a fae eat his own tongue without batting an eyelid."

Luxiana winced, blushing from head to toe. She felt so small and intimidated by Azriel. "Believe it or not," she began in a voice more high-pitched and uncertain than usual, "but, this isn't my first cut tongue and broken arm."

Azriel frowned, prompting him to elaborate. "Well, I worked in a bar. There were bound to be people with inappropriate behavior that I had to correct." She shrugged as if this were normal.

"And where did you learn to do that?" the Illyrian asked, loosening his grip on Luxiana's chin a little, relaxing when he noticed she wasn't lying.

"Keydan explained how to do it and taught me. He wanted me to be able to protect myself if need be."

Azriel understood her sincerity and released her completely, but he couldn't calm his anger. "It was still a dangerous and thoughtless thing to do, Luxiana. I don't know why Keir didn't use his powers, but if had, you could have been hurt or worse, died. Don't ever do that again!"

Luxiana pursed her lips with an apologetic look and a cute, guilty face that made Azriel swallow hard. "Are you angry?" She stepped forward to surround her arms around the master spy's torso and buried her face in his pectoral. Azriel froze for a second, feeling his heart melt entirely as she straightened her head to rest just her chin on his chest and look at him with an adorable pout. "Excuse me," she added.

Azriel's whole body tickled from the inside. He could only calm himself by taking a deep breath. Why was he even angry? He placed a hand on the blonde cheek to lean in and place a long kiss on her lips. Damn it, there was no doubt in his mind. He loved this woman with all his body and all his heart.

Footsteps behind them forced them to separate and turn to see Mor striding in their direction. Luxiana hiccupped in surprise at the sight of Rhys's cousin, then winced with concern as she realized that she had just seen her cut her father's tongue out in front of her. "Mor, I'm sorry," she apologized, taking a step toward her. "I shouldn't have..."

She couldn't finish her sentence as Rhys's cousin threw herself into her arms to hug her with all her might. "I adore you. God, that feels good!"

Luxiana was surprised at first, but then laughed with Mor and returned his hug.

Rhysand detailed his soul mate laughing with her cousin, then glanced knowingly at his two brothers. She wasn't as weak as they thought, and in fact she was incredible. She'd done all this to protect his honor. To protect him. She was made to be his high lady. She was made for him. He stared at her and it wasn't with tenderness or affection but with love. He was in love with this woman, damn it.

[oddmawd]

Hello!!! I read and ADORED your "The Art of Queen Sacrifice"!! I love the way you write Doflamingo, the way hes possessive but caring and domineering!!! Ugh, I keep re-reading it!!! I've been asking my favorite Doffy authors how they "get in his mind" I guess?? Like how do you write him so correctly and seductively?? Thanks, all the love towards you and your work <3!!!

my dear, my darling, my love, i am so happy you've asked! and also thank you for the love and support, you are AH-MAZING....gonna bust out proper grammar for this badboy btw, hold onto your butts

On the topic of writing seductively:

A lot of people think "foreplay" means physical intimate play prior to penetrative sex, but foreplay starts a lot earlier than that. Foreplay actually starts when you're looking at a person from across the room and feeling a slow, spreading tension begin to burn between you. It starts with teasing. With a heated look. With a whispered promise. With watching someone's hair fall over their neck and becoming preoccupied with the way their pulse beats in their throat. Start thinking of eroticism and seduction long before the characters ever lay hands on each other, and you'll find out seduction happens way before the characters ever hop into bed.

(This got long so I'm putting in a "Read More." Click for more about Doflamingo!)

That's why I personally don't write smut that jumps straight into the action. I'm all about "20,000 words of pining before we hold hands, and now holding hands is enough to make us melt." As a writer, I personally find the payoff more satisfying that way. In The Art of Queen Sacrifice, most of the seducing happens while the characters are completely clothed, standing several feet apart, and are in danger of being discovered at any time. It's not touch that seduces. It's the desire to touch, and the inability to do so, that makes the reader gravitate toward Doffy. Denial is a great way to stoke a fire, I've found, and the mental game of seduction is just as important (if not moreso) than the physical.

In general, seduction in writing is all about sensuality. Some people use "sensuality" as a synonym for "sexual," but "sensuality" just means "gratifying to the senses." Yes, it's often sexual, but try shifting focus strictly from sex. Use descriptive writing of the senses as a seductive tool. What does your character smell, feel, see, hear, touch? How do these things impact the body, the mind, the heart? Unexpectedly sensual things (like catching a hint of your lover's cologne, or seeing sunlight in their hair, or just hearing their voice) can become a springboard for attraction and seduction if played right.

On the topic of writing Doflamingo:

Getting into Doflamingo's brain is, in my mind, all about priorities. Never forget that in the end, Doffy's #1 will always be Doffy. He may hold affection for another, or perhaps even some twisted form of attachment a generous person might call love, but at the end of the day, Doffy's #1 will always be Doffy.

When writing him in a romantic setting, I try to think in transactional terms. He might have affection for someone, but what does HE get out of it? Is their love a means to an end? Does he have a reason beyond affection or lust to keep them around? Exploring those reasons (or lack thereof) is a good way to start exploring his character. I'd love to see a romance where he has no real reason to love someone and still feels like Doffy at heart! The balance seems quite hard.

Each story is unique, and each Doffy romance (whether he's paired with an OC or a canon character) is going to be different depending upon the character traits of his love interest. For instance, I think Doffy would behave differently around someone he perceives as his equal (insofar as anyone CAN be his equal). A fellow Warlord, a noble, a powerful fighter, a regular person...each of these people will have a different dynamic with our favorite Horrible Bird Man. If you're writing one of these archetypes, try thinking about he'd act towards a different archetype, and compare/contrast his behaviors. This might give you a clearer understanding of his behavior towards specific people.

As for writing him "correctly"...I don't know that I write him particularly correctly to be perfectly honest. The Art of Queen Sacrifice is an AU fic, and I think there's a level of...not softness, but at least tenderness toward the reader that I might not use in a strictly canonical depiction of Doflamingo. I think my depiction of him in The Grasp of Gilded Strings is probably more on point, though, and getting inside his head was all about understanding his priorities. The good news is that in fanfic, there's room for different interpretations of a character, and I love seeing how other people handle the Horrible Bird Man in their stories. <3

On the topic of Doflamingo + Seduction

If Doflamingo is seducing a person, he's going to be deliberate about it. I think he'll weaponize sensuality, his station as king/Warlord, and even transactional matters to seduce a person.

If they're attracted to him and he knows it, he'll flaunt his physique and be more touchy. If they're more intellectual, his tactics might become more cerebral to match. If he thinks they'll be receptive to gifts, he'll probably shower them with presents.

But don't assume Doffy automatically knows what these needs are. Take into consideration the wants/needs/tastes of his romantic partner, then ask if Doflamingo knows what these tastes may be. Perhaps he's not aware of them. Perhaps he is. Maybe he makes a mistake and has to course correct. But Doffy is smart, and I think seduction, for him, crosses the border into outright manipulation quite often.

After all, Doffy is Doffy's #1. What he wants, he WILL get. And I don't think he's beyond lying, manipulating, and taking full advantage of his love interest's weaknesses to seduce them to his side.

This is Doffy, after all. And even on the battlefield of love, I don't think he takes prisoners (or maybe that just makes it more fun for the Horrible Bird Man).

OK THAT'S ENOUGH RANTING FROM ME, THANK YOU FOR THE ASK, YOU ARE AMAZING AND I WISH YOU LUCK IN ALL OF YOUR WRITING ENDEAVORS! TYSM ILYYYYYY!!!!!!

[joe-spookyy]

nothing makes me more evil than seeing someone misinterpret daniel “oz” osbourne of buffy the vampire slayer fame. this is deeply unfortunate because it seems to be all everyone knows how to do. the amount of people i’ve seen dogging on him for things he did not even have control over is crazy. if you have issues with him read on. he’s the best character and i will die on that hill, so fight me on this one. i dare you. season 4 spoilers under the cut sorry to my friends. also him and tara could have been best friends but this isn’t really about her. just had to say it.

FIRST of all. he did not cheat on willow. veruca took advantage of him. i don’t even get how there’s grey area there - it’s clear that in both situations the wolf has control over oz, but not over veruca. so not only was HE not choosing to have sex with her or even aware that he was doing it, but SHE was aware and was taking advantage of him. this is not in ANY way his fault??? now yeah. he coulda been a little more defensive about himself when he was talking to willow and buffy but it’s oz. he’s already worried about hurting people when he’s a werewolf. if everyone’s telling him he’s bad and wrong for this he’s gonna believe it even if it isn’t true. and he didn’t have to scram and go full no contact after that. but again. he was SCARED! he didn’t wanna hurt willow any more than he already had. he made a snap decision based on what he felt he HAD to do. and if you’re one of the people who says just because he brought veruca into the cage that means he Wanted her to do that to him. i am going to get you. that’s victim blaming. he just wanted to make sure she didn’t KILL anyone. it makes sense that he would pick risking her taking advantage of him again over letting people die. did he handle it perfectly? no. that does not mean he wanted her to do all that. he loves willow and says that so many times explicitly. literally left to make sure he was good enough for her. he did not want veruca. jesus.

and SECOND. even worse is the people who are saying he comes across as homophobic for having a negative reaction to finding out about willow and tara. like. hello. did we watch the same scene. not once does he say anything negative about the fact that they’re both girls. he’s clearly just upset that willow didn’t tell him she was involved with anyone else, and with his whole new controlling the wolf thing, there’s gonna be a lot of pent up emotion and probably anger. so when he got extra upset when tara wouldn’t tell him anything more and eventually ended up wolfing out, it’s clear that it’s because he’s upset that he trusted willow but she didn’t give him all the information about where she was at and whether or not he had a chance with her again. which makes sense from her perspective of course, and tara’s reaction was valid too, but we can’t act like he suddenly hates gay people just cause he got mad that someone he cares about wasn’t totally honest with him. and he warns tara so he doesn’t end up hurting her by accident. and at the end of the episode all he wants to know is whether willow is happy. and she is. and so he’s happy for her and accepts it. i don’t even know how people are getting any other perception of the situation. god. sorry.

big idea is if you think oz is in the wrong for either of these i am going to hunt you down and beat you up evil style and maybe sit you down and have a talk about media literacy.

[libraford]

hello!

do you mind if i ask you for some tips & helps for beginners when it comes to tarot an witchcraft in general? i’m never sure what’s like an actual thing or someone pulling the whole “you’re not autistic you’re actually just a *insert wildly weird thing here*” if that makes sense?

it’s completely ok if you don’t want to answer this btw c: either way please an thank you & good luck with your drag show 🖤

Ummm, I'm not great at beginner tips because my practice is so personal and required so many years of going 'wtf am I doing' that unfortunately most of my advice is 'do some shit, learn hard lessons, try not to hurt anyone in the process.'

So the thing that's happening with the 'you're not (condition), you're (fictional creature)' rhetoric is, essentially, new age eugenics.

Psychology is a fairly new science and there's a lot of people who outwardly don't believe in it. Like they'll believe in pop-psychology that's easily disprovable ('if you chew on ice that means you have an oedipus complex' is one I've heard) but when it comes to things that are actually part of the field like... diagnoses for depression, anxiety, trauma- people start getting weird about it.

Where it comes from could be any number of things, but if you go back just... even ten years the culture surrounding openly talking about diagnoses is completely different. And I think that for a lot of people, having a diagnosis for why your brain does the thing it does means that they have to answer some hard questions for themselves.

There is also some distrust of medication (there have been some... not great medications for depression and ADHD in the past) as well as good old fashioned family ableism.

So. The easiest way to deal with this is to pretend that mental illness does not exist.

And make some rather... interesting conclusions to explain why people are a little strange. They're aliens. They're fairies. They're witches. They're part of an ancient race. They're from another dimension. They're reincarnations of ancient goddesses. They're shards.

If you believe these things for yourself, that's fine. If this helps you navigate your world better and hurts no one, I have no problem with it. It could be true and I wouldn't know it- fuck, I don't know the secrets of the universe.

If it works for you.

Unfortunately-

There are thousands and thousands of terrible books about how to treat your starseed child, your indigo child, your crystal child. And it is exceedingly common that these phrases are used to deny a child proper medical care. It dehumanizes them. It makes them 'other.' Its already difficult to socialize a child- now they're special magical children who don't need to be socialized. And these books sell. And they sell and they sell and they sell...

I am not a scholar in this field- I have just been to places, seen things, and listened to people.

But here's a recent paper linking starseed talking points to far-right extremism that will ruin a lot of New Age rhetoric for you forever.

I realize that my thoughts derailed there... which would be the ADHD. But in terms of what should you do when you're just starting out with witchcraft? Read as much as you can, listen to as many people as you can, but decide for yourself what's true and what's a load of hog shit.

[songofapollon]

Χαίρετε, worshippers and devotees of Apollon!

Welcome to the shrine of Apollon! This is a community shrine, meaning it’s a shrine for many of us to share, offer, and show our Love for Lord Apollon.

The Shrine is a safe space for everyone. By that, I mean any queer people, BIPOC, nonhumans, systems, those who are disabled, neurodivergent, mentally ill, and anyone else who does not wish harm on others. There is ZERO tolerance for racism, ableism, queerphobia of any kind (homophobia, transphobia, etc), or any other kind of hate. The person who runs this blog has signed the xenia declaration.

This is also a place where you may ask any questions you have or request posts you would like to see. That being said, asks or requests that make me uncomfortable or I simply do not want to answer will be deleted.

What Will Be Posted?

I’m not sure how often posts will be, but I would like to try and post at least twice a week, preferably more.

Posts may be information about Lord Apollon or His many aspects, artwork depicting Him, answering asks, prayers or hymns, occasional readings from Him, etc. I haven’t completely thought all of that out yet.

Guidelines

• The biggest one- Be respectful. Everyone worships differently, everyone believes different things, everyone has different experiences. Please always be respectful to others.

• This is a safe space for all - as well as all those I mentioned above, this space also welcomes minors (who are old enough to be on this app, of course). In addition, I, the person who runs this blog, am a minor. So please, please keep everything sfw and kind.

• Do your research. It's okay to be wrong or to not know something, but learn from that.

Additionally, I will try to list my sources in informational posts, and I always encourage you to fact-check me, please don't blindly trust information from a random Tumblr post, as much as I hope my information is true.

• Use common sense and kindness. Always think before you say something, be kind when speaking to someone else. Don't do something you wouldn't do in real life.

Who Runs the Shrine?

Hello there! I'm Aspyn and I run this shrine to Apollon. I am trans, queer, and aroace. My pronouns change a lot but He/Him and It/Its reliably fit me. I am a devotee of Lady Aphrodite, Lord Apollon, and Lord Hypnos.

I AM A MINOR. IF YOU DONT WANT TO INTERACT WITH MINORS DONT FOLLOW.

I am NOT an expert on any of this, nor am I any sort of authority. Please don’t hold me to that standard, I never want to seem like I think I’m better than anyone else.

Tags

The Song of Apollon - Any original post on this blog

Shrine Songs - Original informational textposts

The Shrine Inquires - Community Questions or Polls

Sharing Songs - reblogs

[aihoshiino]

chapter 162 thoughts!

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 19

Aqua Hoshigan Status: uh oh, gamers

damn they dragged his ass right to hell, huh

I was perhaps overly optimistic in expecting an immediate resolution to last chapter's setup. It's becoming increasingly clear that this handful of chapters covering the Aqua-Hikaru confrontation are intended to be read in one go but because I am pedantic I will continue to review them one by one <3 This chapter very much has all the same issues as the previous chapter without quite as many of the things I liked pulling it up, but Mengo's art is back to going absolutely crazy and I got to see 2.5 new panels of Hoshino Ai so who can say whether it was a good or bad chapter.

Like last time, we're starting with Hikaru again and… basically everything I said I didn't like about this handling of him is still the case but with this almost definitely being his final appearance with no more opportunities to explain anything about him, it really sucks that the note we seem to be ending on is just "damn, bitch be crazy". Given that Tsukuyomi mentioned his previously 'noble soul' last chapter, I was really hoping we might get some sort of flashback or Hikaru POV giving some proper context to his actions but all we got this chapter was him being like "ughh i miss ai. GOD i love killing people" which is, uh, underwhelming as a final note for an antagonist like Hikaru to go out on, to say the least

The thing is, I didn't need or expect Hikaru to be totes 100% an innocent bean or anything like that (ch109 looms large), but if he was going to be the final boss like this, I wanted his antagonism to come from somewhere, to have any kind of connecting thread with the story's themes or to at least tell us interesting things about him both in coming to understand where his behavior came from and why he went down this path. But we don't know anything about Hikaru, really - we know facts about his life but as person and a character in a story, our image of him is shockingly unclear. As far as the story seems to be concerned, he came into existence as an 11yo boy being abused by Airi, blipped out of reality when Ai broke up with him and then idk digivolved back into society into a guy from a yandere otome game when Ai died. Like, how in god's name did Hikaru go from the boy we see being broken up with as a teenager to… whatever the fuck this is? How did he start killing? Why? What is it about killing that makes him feel Ai's supposed presence? And most importantly - why does he pursue killing Ruby as his means of achieving this when the narrative is doing everything it can to convince us she's Ai 2.0 and therefore a living person in whom Hikaru should be able to feel Ai's presence the most strongly since her death? Hello? Can anyone hear me????

We don't get textual answers to any of that - hell, we don't even really have any textual confirmation that he is actually serial killer, despite it being something I guess we're supposed to assume at this point?? Like, whatever happened to Aqua seemingly crediting Yura's death to Nino's involvement? What happened to Aqua saying that Hikaru being the mastermind made no sense? Like, I guess he was right, but jesus

Even things I can take the time to try and infer (which, see last review's discussions on Inferring Things) just make me feel like I'm doing the work the story should have done in terms of trying to get his character to cohere. As it stands, Hikaru isn't in opposition to Aqua because he has harmful beliefs or behaviours born from his participation in society that stem from or are in conversation with the story's wider themes, but because he has one very specific unhinged belief totally disconnected from reality focused on one specific person and manifesting in such a way that caused him to just be Ontologically Evil And Broken.

And it's not like this would even be hard to do! Hikaru is literally, explicitly an affluent and powerful person in the entertainment industry despite being someone who was broken by abuse perpetuated by those very systems of power. Why not lean into that? Why not examine the ways in which Hikaru and Ai converged in their experiences of abuse - Ai able to truly sever the chain and begin healing while Hikaru ends up making Airi's mistakes and enacting abuse and control on people with less power than him to try and regain agency and dignity?

Ryosuke (even post retcon) and ch154 Hikaru work so well because their specific beliefs about Ai reflect real world misogyny and parasocialism that are rife in the entertainment industry (and even outside of it) so they're able to contribute to the story's wider themes pretty well. But as of this chapter, Hikaru's stated beliefs about killing and apparent overall worldview are so fucking detached from reality and so lacking any foundation or grounding in textual events or theming that it doesn't even feel like an exaggeration of real world issues to a logical conclusion like Ryosuke does. He just feels like a cartoon character.

Not only is this shallow in general and really a huge wet fart of an ending for a character who has been built up for 4 actual years and 150 chapters of manga, it's also just bizarrely inconsistent. There's no proper connecting thread in the text between the seemingly emotionally disarmed and remorseful Hikaru of 154-5 and fucking joker slenderman ass here. The story spent so long making Hikaru deeply and viscerally sympathetic through exploring his history of abuse and exploitation mirroring Ai's that I'm not sure of what the point of that was in terms of authorial intent if we were always gonna end at this point of "you are Ontologically Evil and must die". Movie Arc backstory Hikaru flows quite naturally into 153-5 Hikaru but these specific beliefs and fixations on killing almost feel like they popped up from nowhere to force this confrontation to happen.

Ultimately, despite being given ample opportunity to do so, it just kind of feels like Akasaka just kind of lost interest in trying to develop Hikaru into a fully fleshed out and coherent character. We get flashes and teases of what could have come together into a fascinating and compelling antagonist but he ultimately fails to evolve past a vague sketch of a character, full of unconnected ideas and loose threads. In the end, Hikaru is only ever a cipher for the story to enact tragedy through with no real interest in his own feelings and interiority in relation to it - not even his own.

To scooch back a bit into the chapter, I will say that him being dragged down specifically by Gorou is interesting, especially since he seems to have returned to his scary ass Tokyo Blade rage ghost form. This seems to represent Gorou and his rage being sort of 'exorcised' from Aqua now his revenge is complete (as I theorized might happen last week) - his memories and existence obviously live on in Aqua (F… FOR NOW…..) but as a character in a narrative, this feels like a fine enough place to leave him.

Anyway, speaking of Aqua! How ya doing, champ?

that bad, huh

The back half of this chapter revolves around giving Aqua some emotional resolution of his own and even though I've been kicking and biting to get some Aqua introspection for so long now, this one left me feeling pretty cold. After all this time of floating around the 'why' of his reincarnation, the answer we're finally given is….. just that Aqua was reborn to be Ruby's guard dog lol.

The idea that the twins were specifically reborn to be together has been imo pretty obvious for a good long while and I think it's a perfectly fine idea on paper, but this framing of it just kind of falls flat to me. I don't like that it positions Aqua's rebirth not as a second chance for him to love and be loved in a way he wasn't able to as Gorou, a gift from Tsukuyomi to two people who showed her a selfless, thoughtless kindness but as just yet more of the story using other characters and their stories to try and prop up Ruby or imbue her with more importance in a way that I think feels forced and does the characters who are used in this manner a huge disservice. I'm sure we could conclude that this is just Aqua's feelings on the matter and I really, really hope that Tsukuyomi fishes him out and gives him a slap while yelling YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO LIVE FOR YOURSELF AND BE HAPPY IDIOT or something next chapter, but the extremely warm framing this is all given makes me think this is something the narrative both agrees with and approves of and as an Aqua enjoyer I just kind of hate that for him.

I also have to say that like… it doesn't not make sense for the story's finale and this aspect of the reincarnation plot to center Ruby specifically. She is one half of the titular Oshi no Kos and at least hypothetically the co-protagonist of the story. But suddenly making her the answer and central turning axis of basically the biggest ongoing mystery in the story like this feels kind of jarring when Akasaka spent a solid half of this entire manga not really doing her justice. This attempt to tug on our heartstrings via flashbacks to the twins' childhood also doesn't really do anything for me because as cute as it is, it's just disconnected flashbacks to brand new events in their childhood we never saw or heard about before. And it's weird because it's not like we don't have in-story examples of Aqua being over protective of Ruby, so why not flashback to those?

Idk. It's hard for me to articulate why this left me feeling kind of cold, but it feels like a symptom of this being part of an ending that Akasaka set in stone too early on and hasn't compromised for he way the character dynamics and story that made it onto paper have shifted and changed in ways that don't one hundred percent line up with the ending he wanted. If the twins' relationship was going to be this important to the ending and be so central to Aqua's existence as a character, I wish we'd spent more time on it. One of the major critiques of OnK that people had from like chapter 12 onwards that I still agree with is that Aqua and Ruby's relationship doesn't feel like a close knit connection between two people who grew up together for 1X+ years, and that continuing issue makes it kind of hard for me to feel the warm and fuzzy sibling feels right now. Which sucks because I LOVE the Hoshino family trio and I love Aqua and Ruby's family dynamic when we actually get to see it - their chapter of interlude and some of the scenes in their home in early OnK are some of my fave parts of the story for that exact reason. But this just kind of whiffed for me.

It also isn't lost on me that Ai is basically absent from these flashbacks despite them primarily taking part in the part of the twins' childhood they spent with her. I get that the idea was to focus specifically on Aqua and Ruby's dynamic there but it still feels kind of…

I've already written a short essay on this topic as it pertained to the initial reveal of Tsukuyomi's role in AQRB's reincarnation and the TL;DR of that post is that early in the series, Ai is centered as a character of as much significance to the reincarnation plot as Gorou/Aqua and Sarina/Ruby are, with the togetherness of the Hoshino family as a trio and Ai specifically as Aqua and Ruby's mother being emphasized as having a great deal of meaning and importance. But this chapter doubles down on essentially erasing her as a figure of weight and consequence in the twin's reincarnation in a way that is both inconsistent and just kind of leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

Like… I'm sorry, but given how much of Ai's character revolves around her being the victim of exploitation, of objectification, sexual and otherwise, of being forced to warp herself to response to the filthy desires thrust on her by the people around her, it's really just gross and a huge misstep for her to be reduced to a convenient walking uterus. It is yet another example of Ai being reduced to just a stepping stone in Ruby's narrative and part of a pattern in this regard I've come to really dislike. Framed like this, Ai's own act of bravery and love in giving not just herself but Sarina and Gorou the family all three of them were denied all their lives is now nothing more than a vessel for Sarina's wish fulfillment. As you can imagine, I kind of hate this too!!

Depending on if volume 16 follows 14 and 15's trend of being 11 chapters long instead of 10, vol16 will end on either 162 or 163 - based on how 162 ends, my guess is that this is our volume ender so I'm curious to see what form 163 will take - straightforward continuation of this scene or focus switch to other characters to maintain suspense? I guess we'll see in THREE FUCKING WEEKS……. Akasaka i swear to god……………………….

sidebar but tsukuyomi just out here floating is kind of wild. what happened to 'it's a normal child's body' ya little twerp?

[afantasyoffiction]

a lil intro :)

hi hello to anyone who's checking this out!

i’m caitlin, an aspiring fantasy writer and maybe poet, english literature nerd and general fandom weirdo who likes to talk a lot about all my many many obsessions :)

i'm new to actively participating on this site as opposed to watching thru the window of pinterest...but now that i write more and 9-1-1 in particular doesn't post on pinterest so much, i'm on here too rip

i talk about: writing, procrastinating writing, reading writing and characters in writing who drive me insane!

my writing: i write poetry which i will post on here occasionally! but my main writing that is intended for other ppl to read is fanfic, and my fantasy wip:

my fics that you can go read literally right now if you want:

just to sit outside your door - buddie post-hiatus wip

if I glued myself shut (you would find your way in) - buck's pov during the 'are his concerns your concerns', feeling realisation

you've haunted me so stunningly - eddie pov during the post -lightning convo w buck, based on that amazing edit making the rounds rn

just to sit outside of your (ipad screen) light - eddie post-hiatus mini fic, feelings realisation

the witches wip: a ya fantasy book (one day trilogy i hope!) about a world where witches are gone, but persecution of them isn't. trying to save her innocent sister from execution, my fmc gets dragged into a storm of political plotting, conflicting agendas and strange powers beyond her comprehension. a book about family, and realising that what you thought was a bedtime story might still be around to haunt you... tagged with #the witches wip

my ao3: a_fantasy_2 - all the good stuff is copied above! tags are #shameless fanfic plug and #caitlin's original writing

main fandoms: i have been in a ridiculous number of fandoms so this is not all of them but these are my main ones - bold are ones im currently in the trenches abt :)

9-1-1 (pls no ship war content tho i just cannot)

marauders (my og loml one true fandom its a canon event i fear)

good omens (book and tv show changed my life)

anything leigh bardugo but SoC and RoW especially

supernatural (its been a while but then again i'm fandom posting on this site so its kinda a given)

anything by chloe gong....(message me PLEASE. best ya fantasy writer and my literal writing idol)

EPIC the musical - i love this so freaking much, if you don't know what this is go find out u won't regret it

hamilton (i am in fact hamiltrash, unfortunately)

aftg (im not writing that out. if you know what that acronym is thats on you.)

tagging system: i got one of those creepy teeth 'frequent poster badges', so i think it might be time for me to get one of these. ahem. on an incoherent blog, i declare order:

#caitlin writes and yaps abt it - writblr content (these will almost always have the 'writblr' and 'writers on tumblr' tag as well)

#caitlin's homebrew hallucinations - any writing or OC content from my wips or poetry i share

#the witches wip - specific wip content!

#caitlin the english major - literature posts

#caitlin reblogs from even cooler blogs and/or #caitlin's moot besties - reblogging my moots or other cool ppl!

#caitlin does ask games / #caitlin does reblog games - making a separate tag bc i LOVE these

#shameless fanfic plug - fics that i write on ao3 and want to share here

#caitlin rambles miscellaneous - anything else thats incoherent

fandom posts will all be tagged with their fandom and with #caitlin a fandom nerd

sound good? let me know if this actually makes this blog make any more sense mk team

please send me: asks/posts/comments about these fandoms, short fic writing prompts within these fandoms, writblr content, writing questions, or literature thoughts :)

(pls don’t send me requests for money or ai content. i will block and delete, here’s why. )

basically reach out if you just want to ramble about any of these things because what else is tumblr dot com for ... seriously what. actually what was this site made for it beats me

[mrs-monaghan]

Hello Shaz

I would love to hear your opinion on 3D and all the talk around it

My thoughts on the talk around it is; "wow, well this is a load of garbage" (no offence to any friends I may have who don't like the song I just disagree that its a terrible song)

Alright. 3D. Let's talk. My thoughts. First, what's with the fucking homeless trousers??

I hate rich people ��😭😭😭 if I wear this people will wonder why I didn't go back home to change after I fell in mud 😪

Anyhu, before i even say a thing. We should probably all try to remember that JK said this

(Thanks @chicknbunny13)

Yeah sure, even if he doesn't write a song, he may resonate with it. But not everything he does is a reflection of his actual life. This one, is for the Jikook antis btw. This is why my anons are still off. People, I dont have the energy for antis rn. JK sang 'girl' so what? This topic is super old and tired and consider it officially retired from this blog. I'm sooooo over it 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Now that we have that out of the way let's tackle the fact that our JK is a grown, grown adult. I don't need to bring back the live where he told people he's an adult and he is almost 30 and he will do what he wants to do. And if he wants to sing about this, that's exactly what he will sing about.

Oh my,

Even Jimin knows all about it

Tweet

BAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!

Let is be known i am choosing to take that sentence literally. I think JK just means him, the girl, with champagne and confetti. I really don't think it means anything else here. But, seeing as this is another sex song, I won't put it past him.

Anyone else notice a recurring theme here?

Okay then. 😳

Also shout out to this random kid with the horse

I can't be the only one who has no clue what his point was 😂😂😂

While we are on the champagne topic,

I mean....

Make no mistake, SEVEN and 3D are singing about the same thing. If SEVEN was in your face, 3D is subtle. But they are both just talking about sex here. Which is why it doesn't make sense to me why people are so upset??? As a person who likes Harlow and has heard his songs before, this did not shock me one bit. There is nothing wrong with this song. It is meaningless and shallow but guess what, thats the type of music the GP is listening to rn. I understand why Asians have an issue with this line

And I can respect that. I don't have to understand it, but if Asians say its offensive, then its offensive. In which case I think that's just ignorance on Harlow's part. The people behind the song and JK himself are not going to okay something degrading. So it is of my opinion that people are reading too much, way too much into something that aint even meant to be deep.

It's a song, about sex. The only thing deep about it, is the holes that will be getting penetrated.

This song doesn't require to be analysed. Okay, maybe when trying to decipher the analogies being used but that's it. JK has one agenda and one agenda only; release music that the general public will devour, get his name out there and be a huge pop star. And it is working.

Cue Boracity's new video about each member and who their target audience are for each solo project

JK did not write these songs. If he did I'm sure they would have more meaning. But that's not what he's aiming for rn. Right now the man just wants to put out something that he knows will sell. Wants to put out something that will be a hit. And 3D is exactly that. Just like SEVEN. Mans was asked for the meaning of the song and by his answer, I'm not sure even he knows.

What??

Did anyone understand that???? If you did, break it down for me coz I did NOT understand that 😂😂

This song has no meaning. Its shallow, catchy, easy to remember and move to. Enough with trying to complicate shit! It ain't that deep. Period.

JK cared more about the choreo.

While Jack is calling himself a whore for wanting 4 women, JK is busy dancing throughout. So I will listen to JK and enjoy the song and choreo. Because there is nothing in the lyrics and there was never intended to be.

Idk why y'all mad when we stan a consent king:

Personally I dont have time to be angry because 1) i see no reason to be, and 2) i am too busy admiring JK's body proportions 🤤🤤

Damn, Jimin's man is hot!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[poetrysmackdown]

some informal thoughts

hello! hope the holiday season has been kind to all of you. and i hope all my jewish followers had a lovely hanukkah! anyways, since i said a few months ago that i’d pick poetry smackdown back up sometime around this time of year, i thought i should make a post. the gist of it is that i’m still quite busy, i have a break that’s about three weeks shorter than I was planning on, and i don’t currently have the mental bandwidth required to read, contemplate, and sort through poem submissions in a way that does justice to them, even if i were to recruit some friends to help out. since running a tournament format requires at least five weeks of continued engagement once it’s underway, and since i’m not at capacity to offer that right now due to the change in my schedule, i’m gonna have to bow out for now. sad bc i was looking forward to it!

my hope is that i’ll have some more time over the summer to hunker down with it, in which case you’ll be hearing from me. it’ll frankly depend on the kind of job i land in for the summer, but i find that my unemployed spirit can typically keep me doing stupid shit regardless of workload...to a point. i don’t want to make any promises because i don’t want to get anyone’s hopes up just to let them down again LOL. i do admit the amount of exposure the first tournament got has made me feel like more of a perfectionist this time around, doubly because i don’t feel that i’m very suited to being a public online presence (even a relatively quite small one)—i’m bad enough at responding to emails for my own real life responsibilities, let alone tumblr asks for the silly responsibilities i invent for myself lol. that’s not to say i no longer want to do it, or i don’t enjoy it, or even that i don’t feel capable of making a really interesting bracket—just that if i am working to put something new together, and if people are taking the time to submit poems they care about, then i don’t want to half-ass it.

my second admission is something like this. I made the original bracket as a celebration of poetry and our relationships to it. yes it was silly and competitive, and the poems were very tumblr, but still, celebration was the intention—I wanted to have conversations about poetry. I stand by the bracket format as a fun and valuable way to foster conversations about poetry, but truthfully, the poems i’m wanting to have conversations about right now—the poems that we should be talking about right now—are ones that i'm not comfortable putting in a bracket. I reblogged The Baffler’s Poems from Palestine collection on here earlier, and Najwan Darwish’s “Who Remembers The Armenians?”, which I still often find repeating through my head when I'm traveling from one place to another, walking home or riding the bus. I came across this beautiful thread recently where people have been translating Dr. Refaat Alareer’s “If I Must Die” into their own languages (this just makes my translator's heart sing!!!!!!). @havingapoemwithyou has been posting some great poems from and for Palestine as well—check out their tag here.

There's always more to add, and I'll be posting more on here as I come across it, but that's what I feel anyone should be focusing on right now when it comes to poetry. i think poetry can be an escape but it should never be a distraction. does that make sense? i wouldn't be against doing a one-off poll here or there, but it feels weird to be making a tournament for poetry right now, or anytime soon. i feel like what free time i have right now is still best utilized helping my friends with organizing in the real world. and god, a bit off-topic but while I'm talking, fuck poetry foundation—I have so much respect for all the poets keeping up the boycott, because while i think it's a simple decision, it's not always an easy one (Aurielle Lucier discussed that here).

anyways, if you read all of this, thank you for your time!! I could go on and on, but really this was just meant to be a message telling y'all that there won't be another tournament for a while lol. even so i'll be trying to use this small silly platform as best i can until palestine is free because that's the absolute least i can do.

[eredhes]

Hey!

I majored in anth at a p awesome school for it (had a so fun class where we hands on used paleo to neo lithic techniques- from making stone tools to processing hides) but there wasn't much available for prehistoric art (+ I was a major switch from microbiology so bio anth, epidemiology and forensics stuff, made more sense with my course history). Been out of school for almost 10 years now and unfortunately doing nothing even remotely related, but I'm wanting to learn more about prehistoric art of all sorts. With search engines being overrun with AI misinfo I'm not really sure where to start other than Wikipedia. Do you have any favorite resources you'd be up for recommending?

Thanks a ton! Happy holidays, and may the new year be kind.

Hello! I should preface this with saying I am just someone with a general interest and not remotely an expert haha! Getting to do hands on stuff sounds really fun!

A lot of my reading has been restricted to Upper Palaeolithic Europe, and cave art at that, so I can't really recommend anything outside of that.

I've been concerned also with avoiding misinformation - there was a painting I saw a while ago where it was obvious the level of research involved was typing "Lascaux" into pinterest and just using whatever results came up (the art used was from Cueva de los Caballos and Mesolithic) and it's been driving me nuts. I've been sticking to books for information, almost everything I've read has been through Internet Archive, and majority are over 30 years old so could be outdated, can contradict each other, and should be noted are can be very racist.

Putting the list of everything under a read more as it's quite long, I hope there's something useful in amongst all of this! Happy holidays, I hope you have a good new year!

Books and other resources I've found useful in no particular order:

The Cave of Lascaux: The Final Photographs by Mario Ruspoli (1987) [Is on Internet Archive but currently unavailable, the German version is still up.] When Lascaux was closed to the public Mario Ruspoli was hired by the French govenment to document the entire cave on film and wrote this book afterwards. Even though it's focus is Lascaux I found it a good introduction to the topic of cave art. I have tried to find the footage online with little success so if anyone knows... do tell. This book brings you through the cave and gives a good idea of the layout and where paintings/engravings are in relation to each other. I would love if there was something like this for other caves but I'm not aware of anything 🤔

Lascaux Virtual Tour [Link here] The video isn't toally clear but it gives a good sense of the layout, and you can click the little 'i' icon to see clearer photos and get more details.

Images of the Ice Age by Paul Bahn and Jean Vertut (1988) [Internet Archive Link] This book is also a good starting point! There's also Journey Through the Ice Age which is the same book.

Cambridge Illustrated History of Cave Art by Paul Bahn (1998) [Internet Archive Link] I haven't gotten around to reading this yet but it appears to be a broader scope and not restricted to Europe.

Palaeolithic Cave Art by Peter J. Ucko and Andrée Rosenfeld (1967) The main appeal of this bok is that it goes through the different possible reasons for cave art. I had to buy a physical copy as I couldn't find it online.

Kindred: Neanderthal Life, Love, Death and Art by Rebecca Wragg Sykes (2020) [Aeon article link "Sheanderthal: Not all Neanderthals were ‘cavemen’: half were women. What can archaeologists tell us about how they lived?] Not solely focused on art but she does talk about what the neanderthals made including a large circular structure in Bruniquel Cave - there is footage of the cave in the recent netflix documentary Secrets of the Neanderthals (not great, at one point the narrator says neanderthals lived in the neolithic lmfao but the interviews with experts are interesting).

Don's Maps [Link here] Really great website. Some books will mention a painting/engraving/sculpture but no image, so my first place to check is Don's Maps as everything he includes is either from a book which will be referenced or from his own visits to caves.

The Neanderthal Museum Digital Archive [Link here] Despite the name is not exclusively Neanderthal, lots of photos of cave art in the Wendel Collection (including a photo of the one known instance of a saiga antelope in cave art that I hadn't been able to find a photo of before!).

There's also the Archaeology Podcast Network and sites like Academia.edu but I don't have any specific recommendations at present.

[nomatterwhatnomatterwhere]

What a ( Not so) Strange World: Extra- Yuu's Interlude

Author's Note: Hello, yes, as always I am late, but hey, we are here somehow. Sorry it's not an actual chapter, more like a little extra - spoilers? sneak peek? - about the next chapter, but I didn't feel like leaving you with nothing so I hope you can enjoy this little extra too

Warning: slight angst, little mention of a panic attack

Masterlist

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

"Dear, I understand you're worried, but you won't help anyone by refusing to take care of yourself."

That was the first thing Yuu heard when they woke up, somewhat confused and disoriented, their breathing quickened and a weight on their stomach.

"While on the other hand pretending nothing has happened helps a lot’ that was your voice, rather shrill and definitely disgruntled ‘ Crowley hasn't even come to check on our condition and Riddle isn't doing any better, Cay said he has nightmares but pretends everything is fine, he doesn't even talk to Trey about it and-"

‘The HeadMaster is … not very empathetic, but I'm sure if he felt it necessary to intervene, he would have.’

That was Professor Trein's voice. Why was Trein in Ramshackle?!

"Yeah sure, because letting his students deal with an Overblot was not a situation where his intervention was needed!"

You sounded increasingly angry and even a little disappointed, if Yuu could read between the lines correctly

"I was scared. I've never seen anything like that. I've never even read about it! I didn't know what to do!" you were starting to sob " Crowley was busy evacuating students who were running away without him intervening anyway, while we were faced with a Riddle who wasn't really Riddle trying to kill us!"

Yuu heard Trein sigh as you sniffled

‘’He's the HeadMaster! How did he not realise one of his students was about to explode!"

"Crowley didn't -"

"He hasn't checked on Riddle once since he came out of the Infirmary. Trey said he made sure his magic levels were within normal range. As if the problem was his magic levels and not his mood or mental state, or whatever it is that causes an Overblot!"

After a few minutes of silence, Yuu was about to make it known that they were awake, but stopped, when they heard Trein speak

"Now that you've vented’ Yuu had never heard Trein speak in a tone of voice that was different from the soporific tone he used in class, yet here we are ‘ Would you kindly explain to me why Lucius found you wandering around the school aimlessly at" brief pause "three in the morning, when tomorrow, today, you have class?"

"As if you didn't already know"

"I'd rather hear it directly from you than make assumptions and maybe draw wrong conclusions."

And you started telling about how you couldn't sleep since the Thing had happened, that's what you had called the Overblot for all the talk, that you closed your eyes and saw only those rose bushes trying to hit you and in your ears you could hear that Riddle's evil laughter in anger.

Yuu could share the feeling, but in their case the adrenalin of that moment had turned into tiredness as soon as their heads hit the pillow.

Wandering around the school gave you back a sense of control, calmed you down and distracted you from whatever was going on in your head.

How back at the dormitory you had heard Yuu mumbling something and worried.

If you, who knew magic, even destructive magic, had trouble coping, it must have been even harder for Yuu.

By the way, Yuu was already having trouble sleeping, even if they hadn't told you, but you weren't blind and you remembered perfectly the look on their faces when Ace had first invited himself into the dormitory.

It was obvious they had nightmares about their situation, you'd had them too when you'd first arrived there, but you'd had support, Yuu seemed left to their own devices and you didn't know how to help

"Does Divus know you're here, or should I expect a second interrogation?" you asked once the whole thing was over

"Lucius threatened to strip his fur. But you didn't hear that from me" replied Trein, making you chuckle.

Yuu heard your footsteps moving away, and released a sigh.

This conversation had raised more questions about you :you had answered some of the questions Yuu had asked at the Unbirthday Party organised after the Overblot.

When Trey had ‘revealed’ that Cater did not like sweets, the ginger had immediately turned his gaze in your direction

"Don't look at me Cay, I didn't say anything."

"Maybe you got bought off by his chocolate muffins" Cater had joked to which you had responded without missing a beat

"They're berry, if we're being clear, and he hasn't offered me one in years"

"Blame yourself for that" Trey had inserted himself into the exchange, throwing you a look that Yuu hadn't quite managed to read, but which you seemed to have understood

"I'm sorry, okay? But it's not really all my fault. I'll make it up to you."

You had confessed that you had known both of them for a long time (‘Isn't it like I tried to hide it, though?’) as you consciously watched a piece of your tart disappear into thin air.

You also knew Che'nya, which made sense if you were childhood friends with Trey, though that didn't explain why you didn't know Riddle

(‘They met Riddle before they met me’ you had explained as you watched the three of you interact with each other ‘ We never got a chance to meet, but Che'nya liked to say I would like Riddle. Now I understand why’ you had not argued further)

If it had been another situation Yuu would have thought Trein was just worrying that a student hadn't broken the rules, or something like that, but this wasn't another situation.

You had called Crewel by his name without any problem, as if you were used to it, you had even joked with Trein as if it were routine.

The mere fact that Trein was using a non-suffusive tone was a huge clue that you had known each other long enough.

The thing was, it didn't make sense to Yuu: your parents had to have some connection to the NRC, otherwise it didn't explain the relationship you seemed to share with the two professors.

Heh. You hadn't actually talked about your family.

You weren't talking about yourself in general, now that Yuu was paying attention.

They should have asked you, as soon as you felt a little better, it wasn't a case of burying yourself in questions you might not want to answer.

You had a bad habit of keeping your problems to yourself, from what Yuu could guess, and forcing yourself to talk about them would probably have the opposite effect.

The next morning had arrived without too many problems, if you excluded yet another bizarre dream and the fact that Grim was a rather rude night owl.

You had already gone out, leaving a note on the kitchen table in which you apologised for leaving without telling them, but you didn't want to wake them up.

You had things to do before going to class, so if you hadn't passed each other in the corridors, you would most likely have seen each other in the Cafeteria.

You hadn't specified what it was you were supposed to be doing, but if Yuu understood anything about you it was that if there was something you didn't understand or didn't know the meaning of then it was time to do some research.

From the conversation they'd overheard that night Yuu would have bet you'd been researching everything you could about Overblot

( Or how to remove Crowley from his role as Head Master, that too could have been a research topic)

Although, if they had to be honest with themself, Yuu believed you wanted to avoid Ace as much as possible, and considering how the two Heartlabyul students were now regular guests at Ramshackle, leaving before he and Deuce arrived at your dormitory was the only solution.

You and Ace didn't know each other. Or at least, Ace certainly didn't know you, yet the annoyance Yuu perceived coming from you whenever the redhead was nearby was only understandable after years of acquaintance.

Ace was cocky, touchy, tactless, and had a rather peculiar way of showing that he cared about someone, but he wasn't just flawed, he fought for injustice, took an interest in other people's motives, and was their friend.

Yet the look you gave him when Riddle had recovered from his Overblot was furious. If you had been in another situation Yuu would have sworn you would have sewn Ace's mouth shut yourself.

It was something you did a lot, Yuu wasn't sure if you realised it, but whenever Ace was in your vicinity you not only visibly stiffened, but also assumed a bewildered expression whenever the boy spoke.

If someone had asked them, Yuu would have said that your reactions stemmed from the fact that you were very similar to Ace in the way you acted, but you weren't aware of that, and you certainly weren't ready for that conversation.

And even more surely Yuu wouldn't have brought up the subject with you, they didn't want to risk the blatant favouritism you had towards them.

Omake:

Good morning,

Well, I hope it's a good morning, but considering how much Grim talks in his sleep, I wouldn't be surprised. I have things to do before class and didn't feel like waking you up - not least because having a moaning Grim around in the early morning is not what I aspire to. To make it up to you, I made breakfast! If Ace and Deuce come, offer them biscuits but remind them that they have a respectable dorm and I don't want any trouble with either Trey or Riddle about their diet, thank you.

Make sure you're not late for class with Professor Trein, he hates latecomers!

P.S. If we don't run into each other in the corridors, save me a seat at the table in the Cafeteria.

[bedeliainwonderland]

@aeshnacyanea2000 I have accidentally deleted your ask (blaming the stupid scam emails, I am so sick of them), but luckily still have the email. (The last bit is But now... for those reading this).

Hello friend ❤️ Thank you for this!!! I am here for any and all bedannibal thoughts!!

Oh this is delicious! It removes the important part: the history they share together before the events of the show. They are starting off from a completely different point, even simply considering the location (Florence?? it just begs for romance), but also the absolute lack of any professional connection between them. Even as a simple link to a possible conversation (as in the fact that they are both doctors could, and did, provide them with a safe topic of a conversation they could fall back). Whereas here, it is purely romantiiic from the start.

I am taking a moment here to think about them in all the romantic glory. Hannibal shows Bedelia Florence. She loves it (as much as she enjoys the city, she has never had anyone show it to her in such way before) and he loves having such a worthy companion. Isn't it what he has always wanted?? Especially here, in a city that means so much to him. They are both so smitten by each other's intellect. The attraction is undeniable, they spend more and more time together. They become lovers and the trips around town give way to endless hours in bed. They have never felt this way before.

Now that I have gotten this out of my system, let's talk about the tragedy of it all. There is no way this could end well and Hannibal knows it. Even without the looming threat of being captured (which is inevitable since he made sure to fuck up enough for this to happen...), he is not who he says he is. And even though, he is absolute being himself (to a degree of course) when he is with Bedelia, it makes little difference, he is still pretending to be someone else aka lying. Now, about being himself... The real question is does he sense that Bedelia might be the ONE aka the person he can reveal himself too and she would accept it. I believe he does, but that just adds to the tragedy. Obviously, it is waaaay too early for revelations of any sorts, but he has so little time. Would he just fantasize about what could have been if they had more time? Would he use the little time they have to build memories he could then revisit? Or would he do something rushed when the noose was closing around his neck?

And an even better thing to consider: Bedelia sensing that there is more to him than he shows. Because of course she does, even before she realizes she does. (It is absolutely something that attracts her to him in the first place, but does not make that connection yet.)

Of course, I always want them to end up together (because they must!) and even if it seems doomed here, I like to think of a scenario where their time together is long enough for secrets to be (partially) revealed, Bedelia's anger come and spent, the reconciliation and understanding that they need each other and their eventual escape together. This is improbable but a girl can dream. (Sorry, I am such a sucker for them). The more likely option is Hannibal being caught and Bedelia then finding out who he really is. She should be terrified and angry, but she is only intrigued. And then one day, while in prison, Hannibal receives a guess, a certain renowned psychiatrist, Dr Bedelia Du Maurier.

This was super fun, thank you for letting me rumble about them!