#do you have summer break rn? if so you have lots of time to rest :) if not try to rest anyway

[uygfiug]

hiiii <333 dont worry about it :) ive probably said this before (?) but im really just happy to talk to you <3 & i get it! im exhausted rn as well, though for me that usually means i reply to some things instantly while others might take a whole month or more

:) i get that, you change your pfp just enough that i dont really get that with you though :)

dont move here just for the beaches, we barely have any & bc of that theyre all pretty commercial & busy :( you on the other hand are on an ISLAND!! lots of good beaches there!!

i think the amount of jellyfish is increasing? bc i had never even seen one before this summer & then suddenly i can barely go anywhere near the water without seeing one so i think youll probably get to see one at some point :)

yeah i think i did say that at some point! my family situation is mostly fine as long as my father doesnt come along, but its just a lot more stressful when there 4 of you, someone always needs a toilet or something & its a lot harder to actually leave on time bc someone always forgets something yknow?

!!! bioluminescent beaches are so so cool !!! i want to go to one so bad. apparently if you get really lucky & go for evening walks at the beach a lot in spring you might come across an area with lots of sea sparkle thatll have the water glowing but alas :( i have no time for that

thank you! i hope you have a lovely week as well <333

hi :) i went to the beach today & saw an incredible amount of jellyfish!! it was so cool!! reminded me of you (bc jellyfish are your favourite animals), so here i am saying hi :)

have a lovely day <33

hiiiii!!!! <333 sorry ive gone AWOL ilysm im just. ouurhhhh

thats so cool 😭😭 actually crying thank you for thinking of me skgbsng. on a somewhat unrelated note, i have a vague understanding of what you look like based on picrew challenges but i still see that specific image of DANC holmes and go omg...anna....

going to a beach and seeing jellyfish would cure me, i think (maybe i need to move to belgium...tho im pretty sure we have some biolum beaches heree??). i hope you had a good day!! i saw your tags a while back and i feel you with sometimes feeling better going and exploring by yourself rather than w family (iirc? bad memory gang sorry). idk what ur situation is like but sometimes its just so much more fun/relaxing. i think going to a bioluminescent beach is on my bucket list - ive done my epq project on biolum, i adore it, i adore jellyfish. i need to go to one sooo fucking badly shaking you i need to shake my hand in the water and watch it glow back

i also saw your bio energy level and i hope you feel better <33 have a nice week :]

[yesimwriting]

we need more felix and lovie content i miss themmm

i miss them too,, i have so many drafts and half finished fics with them but i've had so little energy/time to actually finish any of them bc of finals

but i'm pretty caught up with school rn (by tuesday i'll be on summer break!!) so here's a bit of an i'm-sorry-for-being-absent drabble :)

The nail of your thumb drags against the edge of the page, finally getting the glue to fully adhere to the page.

You press your back against the wood surface of your desk chair to admire your handiwork. The background of your latest scrapbook page has come together just the way you wanted it to. You pick up the book carefully before turning your body.

"Lex," you beam.

Felix doesn't sit up fully, but he does lift his head. The arm holding up his copy of the latest Harry Potter relaxing. "Oh," he mumbles it in that way that reminds you of one of the things you like best about him. He has this talent for giving attention. Where other people would just be polite without a second thought, Felix takes the time to really look before commending.

He pushes himself up in a way that awkwardly squishes your pillow. "That's good." Felix straightens, legs crossing beneath him. "That's really good, Lovie." His thumb tucks itself between the pages of his book, a make shift bookmark. "The edges, the paper..."

"Thank you." Another thing you love about Felix is the fact that you can always tell he means his praise. You turn forward, setting your scrapbook back onto your desk. "You should make one."

The corner of his mouth pulls itself into a version of a smile that's so soft you almost miss it. "Yeah?" You nod. Felix's smile shifts into something more assured. "Maybe tomorrow night."

You try to picture Felix spending a Saturday night in either your room or his, cutting up scraps of paper and gluing them down instead of at a bar or some party. The thought makes your feel warm in that way that's so exclusively Felix. It also feels blurry, intangible in its unlikeliness.

As happy as it'd make you, tonight was already surprising enough. It's not like Felix goes out every night, and this isn't the first time the two of you have stayed in on a Friday, but nights like these are rare. You can't picture two of these in a row.

"Tomorrow?" You pull your legs out from under your desk, entire body angling itself to the side so that it's easier to look at him. "Tomorrow's Saturday."

He lets out a partial laugh. "And you're dying for a rager?"

"No," you mumble, dragging out the vowel sound in an attempt to sound more sarcastic. "But you like going out." You lean forward, resting your chin against the chair's back. "And it's not like I hate going out, especially with you..." You trail off, eyes shifting away from Felix and towards the bed post closest to you. "And I don't want to be the reason you don't do things you like."

For a beat, the only sound is the low, rhythmic tapping of Felix's pointer finger against the spine of his book. "I like a lot of things."

You lift your head. "I know."

"I like doing things with you."

The warmth comes back with a vengeance. You tap your thumb against the side of your seat for the sake of doing something. "Me too."

Felix shifts, extending one leg to make himself more comfortable. "Good." He's so quiet for a second, you almost think that might be the end of the conversation. You're about to go back to picking out the pictures to finish off the page you'd been working on when he starts again, "So you don't need to worry about me resenting you."

Your eyes narrow. "I didn't say anything about you resenting me." Your chin lifts slightly, an attempt at displaying your indignation. "Why are you saying it like that was an option?"

He grins, dropping himself back onto your pillow. "No reason."

You roll your eyes at his sarcasm. He's the one that came over to your room without being asked to. "Sure."

"What?" His tone implies nothing but perfect innocence. He picks up his book, opening it as if he's done nothing wrong. "Y'should come over here before the resentment sets in and I lose all interest."

You let out a loud sigh, but move to stand regardless. "Yeah, that feels like a real possibility."

When you don't move, Felix glances away from his book. "You're not gonna come over here?" He looks up at you, a hint of a pout playing at his expression. "I was kidding."

You cross your arms, fighting against a smile. "I just stood up." That's not enough to convince him to stop looking at you like that. You take a few steps forward with a sigh that's more out of habit than anything else. "You are so dramatic."

You sit on your bed, crossing your legs beneath you. Felix shifts onto his side. His freehand finds your knee. "You cried because of this book."

Eyes narrowing, you lean forward to get a better sense of how far into the book he's gotten. "Wait a few chapters."

Felix snaps his head in your direction, "Lovie. You said you wouldn't--" Your sentence runs into his, "I didn't--I didn't spoil it."

He frowns, watching you skeptically. "That was mean."

"You started it." You're aware that you sound like a little kid, but you can't help it. With a sigh, you give up, laying down. He's taking up most of your bed, but you're far from uncomfortable. "Fine. I'm sorry."

With little warning, Felix leans forward and presses a kiss against your temple. "Want me to read to you?"

You're used to Felix's random displays of affection, but every once in awhile something will take you by so much surprise you feel it more than you should. You blink. "Yeah," you mumble, hoping that your voice comes out even, "Sounds nice."

Felix shifts onto his back, one hand finding your arm and the other holding his book.

----

taglist; @vader-is-hot @spiritofbuddha @getosangie @freyafriggafrey @ilovehyperfixating @aryiannarae @willowpains @ker0senebunny @lilyrachelcassidy @khxna @imbabycowboy

[blossomwritesthings]

𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞. | 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐬 & 𝐰𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐬

⬷ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬

pairing: felix x fem!reader (afab) // chan x fem!reader (afab)

genre: nonidol/collegegrad!felix. waitress!reader. college au. hurt/comfort. angst. fluff. smut - MDNI, 18+ only. reader pov. friends to enemies to lovers au. slowburn romance. lots of pining. cheating. abusive boyfriend/ex. drama galore. the sexual tension is REAL in this one.

content & warnings: brief depictions of violence/a person getting jumped, and the aftermath of that. smut that includes: unprotected sex, breast play, dirty talk, riding, slight breeding kink, creampie, lots of making out, y/n and felix are basally two switches in this ngl. please take care in reading.

word count: 6.2k

summary: ever since you were born, all you've ever known is living a simple life in the small australian coastal town of bridgeport bay. you're content with working at your parent's beachside restaurant angel waves for the rest of your life, and you're happy with your place in the world - you have good friends and an even better boyfriend. that is, until everything comes to a standstill when a familiar face from the past visits town for the summer. and in the wake of his return, lee felix upturns everything you thought you were content with here in your comforting little beach town.

a/n: you guys, I swear to GOD that I did not fucking forget about this fic!!! 💀 trust me, I see all of the msgs and comments in my inbox across my platforms. I've just been too busy and tired from my daily life to keep up with writing much these days. on top of that, I don't feel particularly inclined to write straight-coupled smut rn. plus, my long-distance girlfriend just left from her weekend visit, so besides uni and work, she's been keeping me quite busy. 🤭 anyways, I hope ya'll enjoyed the end of this small series of mine, and thanks for all of the love you guys have shown it over the past year~!! 💗

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ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sɪᴛᴇs (ᴛʜɪs ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴs). do not copy, spin-off, or write inspired work based off of this fanfic without full permission to do so. ©ʙʟᴏssᴏᴍᴡʀɪᴛᴇsᴛʜɪɴɢs ⤐ ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ʀᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ

The worst thing about the next two weeks after your moment with Felix in his bedroom was that the entire time, Chris didn’t even reach out once. 

 There were no calls, no texts, no emails, no letters. 

 Just… nothing. 

 And that hurt the most out of everything else. 

 Pretty soon after your night spent over at Felix’s house, you came to terms with the end of the relationship. With the cheating and all the other shit. 

 But the one thing you couldn’t shake was the fact that there was complete radio silence on his end. 

 He didn’t even try to fight for you. 

 Didn’t even do his very best to get you back. 

 Instead, he just kept living his life, while he continued to fuck your best friend. 

 Yeji, on the other hand, had texted and called you at least a dozen times. None of which, you replied to. 

 She was acting like you two were in a romantic relationship. Like she was Chris in the situation. 

 It took her showing up to Angel Waves on a busy Friday night to finally be your breaking point. You were fed up with her bullshit. What ensued was a huge blowup between the two of you at the front of the restaurant. 

 But mostly, it was just you screaming. You who was the one who yelled at the top of your lungs, the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. 

 For the most part, Yeji stayed silent. Just standing there and taking the brunt of all your hatred and disgust. And finally, when you told her you guys were done… that the friendship was officially over, that’s when she started to protest. 

 Soon, she was yanking on your hands, begging you to ‘not do this,’ and to ‘think it over some because-‘ But you had heard enough. From the moment you saw that long-ass text thread between her and your boyfriend, it had been over. 

 And just like that, the friendship was broken, and you were having your father escort her out of AW. Before you knew it, he was telling her never to come back again, and never to grace the doorstep of your house, otherwise he’d press charges. Since you had told your parents about the breakup and everything else that had happened along the way, they were fully on board with protecting you from the people who had hurt you so much. 

 Thankfully, Yeji didn’t go any further. As quickly as she had shown up at the front door of Angel Waves, she was gone. Forever. Good riddance to her, you said to yourself as you watched her walk down the side of the restaurant and towards the parking lot. 

 Perhaps the worst part about those two weeks after the breakup was the fact that you hardly got to see Felix. Between you grieving the relationship alone late at night in your room, studying homework, and waitressing at AW, you hardly had any free time to yourself to reach out to him. 

 But because Felix was… well, Felix, he made it a point to text you every single morning and night. Checking up on you and letting you know he was always there, rooting for you. That his door was always open in case you wanted to talk. 

 And for the most part, you found that you were doing okay. You wanted to be left alone in your thoughts. At least, for a little while. Yet, late at night, when your eyes were puffy from crying and your throat was scratchy, you’d look out of your bedroom window and watch the dark tidal waves ripple in the distance. 

 The changes in the blue colors of the ocean felt like your feelings throughout that time. One moment they were crystal clear, the next they were the deepest shade of cerulean. Through it all, you were lucky to have Felix by your side. Silently supporting you from afar. 

 That’s why, when Han Jisung showed up one random Thursday night to Angel Waves during a lull, you were confused out of your mind. He had already been served and was chowing down on a huge burger and fries. When you walked up to him, already smoothing down your apron and dress, he didn’t even pay you any attention. 

 “Uhm- Ji, what the fuck are you doing here?” You asked incredulously. Because although you guys were friends, he hadn’t frequented the restaurant much, quoting that it was ‘much too bougie for his taste.’ 

 At the sound of your voice, he looked up from his plate and flashed you a wide grin just as he stuffed a couple of fries into his mouth. “Goddamn- this shit is good… did you know that, Y/N?” He laughed as he took another bite out of the burger. 

 Rolling your eyes at him, you looked around the restaurant to make sure you weren’t needed elsewhere before you sat down in the booth’s seat across from him. “Yeah, because my parents own the fucking place.” You deadpanned, raising an eyebrow his way as he grinned at you from behind his burger. “But I don’t think you came here tonight to devour a burger. So… what’s up?” 

 He took a swig of his chilled bottle of coke before finally answering your prodding. “Did you know that Chris is in the hospital right now?” 

 And just like that, your entire world stopped. 

 Everything came to a standstill. 

 The noise, hustle and bustle. The energy flowing throughout Angel Waves honed down to a single point as you focused on Jisung’s words. 

 Because… what, the actual, fuck?

 Leaning forward in your seat slowly, you could feel your heart beat wildly against your ribcage as your eyes grew in shock. “I’m sorry- what?”

 Jisung shrugged nonchalantly like this news was completely mind-blowing. “Yeah, Jeongin texted me last night, guess he visited him in the ER yesterday. Rumor has it he got jumped or something…” Then he was leaning forward too, eyes floating around the room before locking onto yours and dropping his voice down into a whisper. “But c’mon, a jump in Bridgeport? No fucking way. My bet is, he got mixed up in the wrong crowd involving drugs or some shit.” 

 “Chris. Got. Jumped.” You said slowly, shaking your head in disbelief as your mind started spinning with millions of thoughts. But the one that came to the forefront, you blurted out immediately. “How bad is it? It must be pretty horrible if it landed him in the ER.” 

 Jisung was busy stuffing his face with more burger and talked between chewing. “Beats me- Jeongin mentioned something about a few broken bones and some really bad cuts, but I’m sure that fucker will survive no problem.” Since everything that had happened between you and Chris within the past few weeks, Jisung had also cut all ties with him and officially hated his guts. “Serves him right, honestly, from the kind of freakish shit he pulled with you and Yeji…” 

 After that, Jisung kept talking. But you couldn’t hear him, couldn’t pay attention to him any longer. 

 Because all you could think about was what Felix had told you a few days prior. How he had to go out of town for the weekend to complete some “interviews” for a dance instructor position he was interested in. He had mentioned something about it being a few hours away, but so suddenly, everything was clicking. 

 How he told you not to worry if he didn’t reply to your calls and texts. 

 How he said he’d be back late at night that Wednesday. 

 You were shooting up from your seat after that, checking the current time on your phone. It read just a little past eleven at night. Hopefully, Felix was still up. Hopefully, he was home. 

 When Jisung noticed you moving away from the table, he grabbed ahold of your hand to stop you in your tracks. “Where are you going?” 

 “I think I know who did it.” You began, giving him the look. Jisung’s eyes searched your entire face, and for a moment, you automatically knew when it clicked in his mind. When it registered, with stark clarity. 

 “He did what he had to do.” 

 “It’s fucking illegal, Ji.”

 Shrugging nonchalantly for the second time that night, Jisung took a dainty sip of his coke. “I mean, if it was me- Chris wouldn’t even be alive at this point.” 

 You pushed on his shoulder, scoffing lowly. “Well then, good thing you’re not in the same position.” And with that, you were fleeing from the restaurant entirely, ripping off your apron and throwing it on a nearby barstool as you made your way out the back entrance. 

 Felix’s house rose against the horizon in the distance. You broke out into a run, turning breathless fairly quickly from the adrenaline and worry running through your veins. As you got closer to the white-wooden paneled house, you noticed how most of the lights were switched off. 

 Save for the one in his bedroom. 

 Taking in a deep breath of relief, you made to climb up the porch and hoist open his bedroom window. Just like he had taught you all those years ago when you’d sneak into his bedroom after curfew during high school. 

 The fucking pane wasn’t even unlocked - figured, since he trusted the police officers a little too much in Bridgeport - and soon, you were climbing through the window and sitting down at the edge of his bed. 

 The nearby bathroom light was on, the warmth radiating from the crack of the door near the floorboards, and you could hear water running just behind the door. 

 Holding your breath, your hands twisted together with your nervousness. The air suddenly felt so fucking stifling and warm, yet you could feel the gooseflesh running down the lengths of your bare arms as you sat there. 

 Perhaps you shouldn’t have worn such a thin white tank top when it was on the chillier side of a summer night. Looking down, you realize just how short your ripped shorts were. They rode up your thighs as you sat there across his bed, and you hastily pulled them down to save some form of modesty. 

 Before you could fix up any other part of yourself, the bathroom door was swinging open and the trapped light was flooding across the entire dimly-lit bedroom. The warmth cascaded across your skin, and when you looked up from the ground, Felix was illuminated by it. 

 He was… shirtless. 

 With… messy, dripping wet hair and a pair of loose black sweatpants haphazardly thrown on.

 “Y/N- uh, what are you doing here?” He asked hesitantly, running his hands through the back of his hair in the way he always did when he was taken aback. “I just got back from a swim, I didn’t-“

 “Is it true?” 

 “Is… what true?” He raised a dark, perfectly manicured eyebrow your way as he neared his desk. Reaching out, he squirted out a tiny bit of lotion onto his delicate fingers and gently patted the product onto his skin. 

 “The fact that Chris is in the fucking hospital right now.” 

 “Oh. That,” he didn’t even seem surprised to hear your words, meaning that he had already heard about it. He rubbed a small amount of emulsion onto his cheeks before flashing you with a tiny grin, staring at you through the mirror. “Minho told me this morning. Heard it’s pretty bad.” 

 “Show me your hands, Felix.” You said, voice low and icy against your tongue. For a moment, Felix stopped his movements at the desk. He just stared at you from the mirror that was hung on the wall in front of it. And when he made no sign of moving, of heeding your words, you pressed again. “Felix. Show me your fucking hands.”  

 Felix raised an eyebrow your way, as he closed the bottle of lotion and placed it back on its glass holder atop his desk. “I’m at no liberty to do what you say. You can’t tell me what to do, angel… As much as you probably want to.” 

 The way the pet name sounded coming from his mouth did something funny to your insides just then. The way it twisted around his tongue and came out softly yet a little bit harsh, too, twisted up everything inside of you and made you want to scream out loud. 

 But you didn’t know if you wanted to scream at him, or for him. 

 And before your heart could catch up to what your brain was doing, you were standing up from the bed and your legs were stretching across the floor. The length between the desk and bed frame wasn’t long. And before you knew it, you were just beside Felix, taking ahold of his hands and bringing them into your line of vision. 

 They were… 

 Bruised. 

 Badly cut. 

 And various shades of violent reds and purples. 

 Half of his hands were bandaged up, the other halves were completely open. 

 “Felix… what-”

 Yanking his hands out of your hold, he ran them through his unruly blonde locks, sighing heavily. “He’s lucky I didn’t fucking kill his sorry ass. I almost did, that night on the highway- when I saw him hit you like that.” 

 Reaching out, you grabbed onto one of his hands again and squeezed it slowly. “You could go to jail for this, Lix. Chris- he’ll… he’ll press charges. You know he will.” Your voice sounded strained and desperate. And you could feel the tears pricking at the corners of your vision at the sheer thought of it all. 

 Of Felix going and seeking out your ex just so he could beat him to a pulp so much, he landed the fucker in the hospital. 

 Because no, not your Lee Felix. 

 Not the boy who was known throughout elementary middle and high school as the sweetest human in the entire world. 

 Not the boy who couldn’t hurt a fly. 

 Not your sweet, pretty… Felix. 

 Shaking his head slowly, Felix’s eyes met yours through the reflection in the mirror. “He won’t press charges, trust me. I made sure to fuck him up enough that he wouldn’t. Chris is too much of a coward to ever show his face around these parts again.” He flashed you an easy grin, squeezing your hand faintly in reassurance. 

 And you actually believed him. 

 Because if it had been bad enough to land Chris in the hospital, and leave such nasty wounds and scars across Felix’s entire hands, you were pretty sure your ex would never face either of you again. 

 “But… why? I don’t understand why you’d do something like that?” You began, getting choked up again. Chest heaving slightly, you leaned into his side, breath hitching in the pit of your throat at just the thought of Felix being taken away from your side because of a stupid fight and breakup. “Why would you do it when you know the risks? I can’t fucking lose you, Felix, I- not again. Please.” 

 At that, Felix was turning completely. So that he was facing you. And then he was pulling you towards him, wrapping his arms around your waist as you buried your face in his bare chest. His warm skin against your lips lit a fire in the pit of your stomach, but at that moment, you couldn’t see or think about anything past your tears. That were steadily flowing down your face. 

 “I’m not leaving you, Y/N. I’ve done that once, I promised you I wouldn’t do it again.” He said in a soft voice, as he carded a few fingers through your hair in a soothing gesture. 

 “Why? Why did you do it?” You cried out softly, nestling your face into his naked skin. Your body was seeking out any kind the warmth, from the way that the fright was wrapping around all of your senses in that moment. 

 For a few beats, everything was silent. The only sound in the entire bedroom was your quiet sniffles. And Felix’s breathing. Then, he spoke in that deep voice of his. “Because I care, angel. A little too much, it would seem. I care way too much to sit idly by and let a man like that walk this earth without having any consequences.” 

 “Us breaking up was a punishment enough.” 

 You could sense Felix shaking his head above you, as he held you close to his half-clothed form. “No. He never deserved you, from the very beginning. That’s why I got so angry- on graduation night. Because you couldn’t see what I saw in him… which was absolutely nothing.” As he spoke, you could feel him tensing against you. And only then, did you realize that the tears had stopped. And instead of listening to your sobs, you were listening to what he was telling you. “I couldn’t stand the thought of seeing you with him when I knew he was a horrible fucking person. I couldn’t stand the thought of hearing you talk about him on our calls once I went to Korea. I couldn’t stand the thought of any of it. That’s why I cut everything off.” 

 Moving away from his chest just slightly, you stared up at him and met his gaze. “You could’ve told me all of this, you know. And I would’ve understood.” 

 Raising a noncommittal eyebrow down at you, he scoffed lowly. “Really, Y/N? Because your actions from the past say something very differently.” 

 And without even thinking about it, you were raising your hands, brushing a few strands of his loose blonde hair behind his ears. “Yes, really. Because I love you and I value your opinion so fucking much.” 

 “No, don’t say that.” 

 Felix’s words came out deathly quiet, making your heart stop beating in the pit of your chest for a few seconds. Frowning in confusion, you pressed your lips together in a displeased line. “What do you-”

 “Don’t say you love me, because we both know that if you did- you never would’ve been with him in the first place,” Felix said slowly, in a breathless kind of way. But despite his words, he was already moving slowly. Hands reaching up, his slender fingers tracing the line of your jaw. Eyes watching the way you breathed out in a shuttering kind of way at the movement. 

 “So tell me that you don’t. Tell me that you don’t love me.” He continued, even as his hand was slipping behind your neck and his other hand was finding its way onto your hip. He yanked you a little closer to his form. 

 Swallowing down a mixture of a moan and scream, you met his gaze. And there, you found a myriad of emotions. His eyes were hooded and searching, as they wandered across your face, picking up on every one of your emotions. There, you found love and… desire, too. 

 “I love you, Lee Felix.” 

 “That’s not what I told you to say. That’s the opposite, actually.” He said in a gravelly voice, the sound of it rumbling out of his chest and cascading down your entire body. 

 Shrugging just a tiny bit, you offered him a sly kind of smirk. “Guess it’s opposite day then- because I-”

 Instead of words, his mouth was the thing that cut you off next. 

 The kiss was so abrupt and sudden, that your brain had hardly any time to process it. Then, all of a sudden, you were melting into the feeling of it all. Of his lips pressed against yours, fervently seeking you out. You nearly fell into his arms, if it wasn’t for the fact that he was holding onto your waist with one hand, and the other was wrapped in your locks at the nape of your neck. 

 “F-Felix-” You moaned out softly in the split second that he pulled away to allow you time to breathe. Then his mouth was back on yours with a searing vengeance, as his tongue prodded at the line of your lips. 

 And just like that, you let him in. His warm tongue slipped between your teeth and soon you were exploring each other’s tastes in a heated, frenzied kind of way. Almost like, without the two of you even realizing it, your mouths had been craving each other from day one. 

 Felix pulled on your hair a little bit harder after that, tilting your head back just enough as his lips parted from yours. And when you were about to protest from the lack of his mouth, he trailed his head downward, making a path of gentle kisses down the side of your cheek, across the line of your jaw, and towards the column of your neck. 

 When he stopped just above your breastbone, where the top of your ruffled tank top started, he stared up at you with wide, imploring eyes. “Too much?” He asked in the gentlest of voices you had ever heard come from a man. 

 But already, you found yourself shaking your head vehemently. “No- never.” So you let him take control. You let him move you two backward until he was sitting down on the edge of the bed and you were cradling his hips with either of your legs, sitting atop his lap. 

 “I’ve wanted you like this for so fucking long, I don’t even know what to do with all of the thoughts I have right now…” He whispered, hands coming up to your shoulders and massaging the skin there. 

 You dipped into his presence, pressing a few feverish kisses against his lips. “It’s okay- I can tell you what to do,” you mumbled in between kisses, tasting him and catching his scent of body wash and salt water. “Take off my top, Lixie.” 

 And surprisingly, he did what he was told. Soon, he was helping you shed your white tank until you were down to your light purple bralette. Sitting there, on his lap, you watched all the emotions dance across his brilliant face. “You’re so fucking beautiful- I have no words anymore-” He mumbled, eyes roving across your half-exposed chest and catching on the way that your hands stretched behind your back. 

 Soon, you were unclasping your bralette and throwing it off to the side. You stared back at Felix, your gazes locking. Almost like, he couldn’t bear to move his focus anymore downwards. Like if he did, the moment between you would break and he’d wake up and realize all of it was but a mere dream on the horizon. 

 “Kiss me, Felix,” you whispered, but the deep, cloying tenderness of your voice suggested to both of you that you weren’t talking about your lips. And just like that, he was leaning forward, beginning to pepper featherlight kisses down the column of your neck and onwards. 

 Carding your hands through his damp, shaggy blonde hair, you pushed his face a little closer to your skin, guiding his mouth until his lips were hovering over your chest. Then he was looking up at you again, eyes gaping wide open almost like he was asking for permission yet again. If he didn’t get the all-clear from you for the millionth time that night, the entire thing would be ruined. 

 “Open up, baby,” is all you said in a soft voice. The whispery sound of it floated out into the darkness of the room, wrapping around the two of you just as Felix did what he was told. Like a good boy. 

 Unhinging his jaw just the tiniest of bits, he easily fit his lips around one of your pebbled nipples. And like magic, like some devilish sex faerie took ahold of his mind, he was sucking on your skin within the next breath. Sucking so good, soon you were throwing your head back in pure ecstasy. Fingers wrapping around his blonde locks a little more, you pushed his face closer to your form. 

 His teeth grazed your goose-flesh skin, licking every part of you that he could get his mouth on. And when he came up for air, the sound of saliva popping off of your cool tit, Felix was smiling a devious kind of smirk. “Your skin tastes so fucking good…” Then he was eyeing your other nipple, that had been left untouched as of yet. 

 Peering down at him with a slightly raised brow, you moved across his hips. The single shift in position made him groan out loud in pure agony, a tinge of crimson bursting across his cheeks as you ground down against the hardness between his legs. “Then why the hell did you stop, Lexie?” 

 And just like before, he was heeding your words. His mouth came around your other pert bud, sucking and licking and kissing. Meanwhile, his hands were busy roaming across your entire body… tweaking your other nipple, grasping onto your hip before skirting up the length of your spine. The entire time, you slowly moved your waist against his, feeling the tent growing just beneath the thin fabric of his black sweatpants. 

 Each time you danced a little bit closer to where you needed him most, he let out a string of filthy groans against your skin. Your movements prompted him to suck even harder, to drawl out as many heavy sighs as he could from deep inside your chest. His bare chest heaved with breath, as he rarely came up for hair. Muscled pecks and abdomen flexed, constricting every time you edged him a little bit closer to the edge. 

 When it finally became too much for him, he was pushing away from your wet, pebbled tits. “N-Need to be inside you, right fucking now.” He was practically whining, in that deep voice of him. It was really adorable if you were to be truly honest with yourself. “Please… need to… I need to…” 

 But the words didn’t make it out of his mouth in time. Instead, you were pressing up into his space, imprinting kiss after heated kiss to his swollen lips. And when you were done, you pulled away just slightly to tuck a lock of messy blonde hair behind his ear. “What do you need right now… baby? Tell me, and I’ll give it to you.” 

 “Need to fuck you,” he started, breathing heaving so deeply that his shoulders shuttered with it. Sparkly eyes peering up at you with a wide, deer-in-the-headlights kind of resemblance. “Need to breed you- fuck you raw, for Christ’s sake…” 

 He said the last of his words with a kind of venom you had never heard from him. Almost like… 

 “Felix… are you, jealous?” 

 Surprise dawned across his entire face then, as the crimson of his cheeks only deepened the freckles smattered across his skin. “W-What? No! Why would you even-”

 “Lee. Felix. Are you mad that Chris got to fuck me raw?” 

 “Well now, how could I be when I don’t know if-”

 A tiny smirk started to pull your lips upwards, as you said “Oh no, we definitely did. Most of the time, actually.” 

 Utter shock burst across his face at your confession. And for a few moments, you felt somewhat embarrassed. To admit such an intimate detail about your sex life with your longtime boyfriend. Especially to the best friend you had known since you were a little girl. 

 Flabbergasted for a few seconds, Felix raised a finger in the air in a snooty kind of way. “First of all, that is incredibly risky. Second-”

 “And like you wanting to do it now isn’t incredibly risky and dangerous too?” 

 Your snarky comeback threw his argument right back into his court. And he glared your way, rolling his glittering eyes dramatically. “Okay, but this is fucking different. I’m not gonna-”

 “Cheat on me with my best friend and then slap me across the face when I try to break up with you?” 

 “God- will you let me finish, woman?!” 

 You liked riling him up. It was fun and you had always taken great pleasure in it, ever since you were a young child. So you sat back a little bit, pushing away from his hips somewhat and folding your arms across your bare chest. “I mean yes- eventually, I am gonna let you finish tonight. But okay, make your argument.” 

 Running a frustrated hand through his silky, damp hair, Felix’s eyes searched the room for the words he wanted to say. “I don’t wanna fuck you because I think you’re easy and then I’m gonna be done with you after tonight. I wanna be with you because I fucking love you. I have, since day one. Since we were little kids, I had a raging crush that grew into an uncontrollable fire and then into a monster.” By then, he was staring right back at you again. Gazes locked, it was like he was searching into the depths of your very soul. You could see so many emotions written across his face then… love, anger, passion… “The only reason I wanna- wanna come inside is because I wanna make sure you know you’re mine and that I’m yours.” 

 For a few beats, everything was completely silent. Save for the heavy breathing on both of your ends. 

 Then, a sly kind of grin was flashing across your face as your hands hastily made their way down to your hips, ripping off your shorts at record speed. Way faster than your fingers had ever done in the entire time that you had been intimate with Chris. 

 And before you could even say anything, before any words were even spoken between the two of you after Felix’s passionate tyraid of love, you felt movement underneath you. 

 Between your legs, you could feel hands moving. Across your thighs, they danced- spreading, opening, caressing. Until they were pressed up to your very centre, drawling a loud moan from you as they played around your clit. In mere seconds, Felix was slipping two digits into you, opening you up gradually. 

 “Fuck, your pussy is stretching so nicely for me…” He grunted, leaning into you and pressing feverish kisses to your lips. He bit down on your bottom lip just slightly, and each time he hit his fingers up into that gooey spot inside of you, you swore you saw stars. “Gonna be fun to fuck this tight, pretty thing.” 

 You twirled your hips across his fingers, shivering in pure bliss each time his thumb caressed your enflamed bundle of nerves. “L-Lix… I… need…” But all semblance of forming words fled from your body entirely, as the heat of arousal overtook your entire form. 

 “You need me, hmm?” Felix mused in a deep voice, the one he knew drove you up the fucking wall in a subtle kind of way. “Okay then.” He said, and soon, his hands were yanking away from your cunt altogether, as he pushed his sweatpants down and off of his hips. 

 In mere seconds, he had his fingers gripping your bare ass, nails digging into the flesh there as he helped move you into position. Holding your breath after that, feeling it widen across the expanse of your ribcage, you slowly began to sink onto his cock, which was glistening with precum. The tip sunk in with ease, and when you finally sunk to the base, a deep wave of pleasure ran across the length of your spine. 

 He was a lot bigger than you had originally thought, and you could feel the tip of him reaching into the very depths of you as he slowly helped guide you back up his length. 

 “Shit- you feel so goddamn amazing, princess…” Felix panted out loud in a thick tone, and with that, he was gripping your hips and helping you sink back down onto his cock with keen precision. 

 With each movement of your hips, he thrust up into you, nails digging into your ass cheeks while you leaned into him, grasping onto his chiseled pecks with the force of each long drawl you took. Nothing else needed to be said between you, as you focused in on the passion that was both thrumming through your veins. 

 Every hit of his cock up into your tightness made the blood in your body boil, and each breath that you took through your constricted lungs brought you a little closer to that blissful cliffside. You cracked your eyes open just a tiny bit to watch Felix’s gaze. The way it was serious and pointed towards the point where your bodies met. 

 The sounds of skin slapping against skin, of your wetness mixing with his girth, almost sent you over the edge countless times. And each time he sheathed himself back inside of you, you could feel his length growing tighter.

 “I-I’m really close, Lix- fuck…” You cried out in a broken tone, throwing your head back as you danced ravenously across his lap. His tip reached up so far into you, that you could practically feel it in your tummy. 

 Felix shuttered in a deep, cloying breath. And when your eyes widened to focus on him again, he was smirking up at you. Pearly white teeth flashing against red lips, he made to kiss you through the wave of pent-up arousal that was flooding your entire system. “Let go for me, my perfect, pretty princess… it’s okay, you can cum around my cock. I don’t mind.” His words made your eyes cross a little bit in bliss. 

 And just like that, your body was moving on its own accord. Thigh trembling around his hips, a strangled kind of scream ripped free from the deepest parts of your soul. Within seconds, you were crashing down from your high, the orgasm lighting every part of your closed vision. Otherworldly visions and galaxies splashed across your mind, taking you to another place as you rode through your high. 

 The entire time, Felix soothed you with beautiful words of praise. And when it was finally time for him to cum, you were only pushed further over the edge of your orgasm. The feeling of him shooting himself deep inside of you made your eyes cross and made you bite your lip in pure ecstasy.

 “Goddamn- your pussy feels so fucking good pulsing around my cock like that- milking me dry-” Felix was spewing half-nonsense as he rode out his own high, thrusting up into you and fucking the cum back between your walls. You were incredibly glad that you hadn’t used anything for protection because you knew that your first time with Felix wouldn’t have felt as special if there was plastic between the two of you. 

 When the two of you finally came down from your highs, it was only a matter of time before Felix was pulling out of you. Groaning at the absence of him, he positioned the two of you so that you were both lying down on his bed. 

 “Was that… too much?” He asked, turning onto his side to peer into your eyes.

 Mimicking his posture, you traced a few fingers across his freckled cheeks which were still warm to the touch from arousal. “Baby, no. It was perfect because you’re perfect.”  

 He giggled like a little schoolboy at that, grabbing ahold of your waist and yanking you close to his form. He brought his face close to yours, whispering in the lightest of voices, “I’m so lucky to have you in my life again. From the moment we first time, I never wanted to be parted from you, Y/N.” 

 “You’re the best thing to ever happen to me, Felix.” You murmured, just as he leaned in to press fleeting kiss after kiss against your lips. Then you were pulling away from his affection, offering him a smirk. “Now help me clean myself up.” 

 “Why? You don’t wanna carry my baby?” He was pretending to be offended, furrowing his brow and frowning in a sardonic kind of way. 

 Punching his bare shoulder playfully, you rolled your eyes in only a slight bit of annoyance. “Not right now, stupid.”

 “Okay, but that leaves the future up for interpretation…” 

 For a few seconds, you let the silence fade between you. And you could feel the tiny smile crack across the corners of your lips as the realization entered Felix’s mind. That quite possibly, one day, when the two of you were much older, you’d want to carry his babies.

 Then, in the blink of an eye, he was grasping your hands and pulling you up from the bed. Leading you open to the bathroom with a bright grin flashing across his lips. “Let’s get you cleaned up, princess.” 

 And you let him take the lead. 

 You let him, knowing in the back of your mind that no matter what- he would always have your back. 

 No matter how much time you spent apart and how much shit happened between the interim. 

 He had always been the only person there for you, and we would continue to be for the rest of eternity. 

 Through thick and thin. 

 First, as a best friend. 

 And second, as a partner and the love of your life. 

Fin.

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[viridwns]

Do you know when you'll be able to finish Miscommunication, part 3 with Yan!Douma, Yan!Akaza, Yan!Kokushibo, Yan!Muzan x FEM!Reader?

I have a draft saved rn. It still needs loads of editing and I still need to write the ending. In the meantime, I'll give you a small sneak peek as a reward for being so patient with me ;)

THIS WILL BE EDITED IN THE FINISHED PIECE! IT IS BUT A ROUGH DRAFT

-

Shut up shut up shut up—

Your fingers clench around the fabric that was covering your chest.

It was soaking wet; having absorbed most of the water that was percolating down your hair and skin.

Your heart, it was beating too fast. It was loud in your ears, and by the gods, it hurts.

You pushed yourself even deeper into the hollow trunk of a rotten tree. Your breaths were shallow and uneven.

Calm yourself. Otherwise, they will find you.

You tried to scare yourself into absolute silence, but you were already frightened enough.

You knew everything you did was too loud. With their inhuman sense of hearing and smell, this wouldn't cut it.

You hoped the deer blood that coated your body would suffice as a scent blocker. The still moist substance mixed with your sweat, tears, and even blood if you were unlucky enough to have cut yourself while running.

You begged that the dead of the innocent prey wouldn't be in vain.

Splinters dug into your abused flesh. You bit your lips and squeezed your eyes shut. All to keep a sob from spilling over your lips. You just had to wait for first daylight, the first few rays of sun. Then you would be free.

No,

Not even then.

You had to escape this hell bound country. Maybe then you could find peace.

It's mid summer already—it was still early autumn when I visited Japan.

Has it really been that long? You felt your hands starting to shake at the thought of having disappeared from the face of the earth for so long.

This was the first time you were successful in avoiding their grasp. All it took was pretending to play house with them and gain enough trust.

You had to hold yourself back when they allowed you to go outside the first time. It was hard not trying to leg it the first few times, but it got easier over time when you were carefully working out your escape plan.

Muzan should be recovered by now.

Instead of wallowing in self-pity and feeling miserable, you stopped fighting them. They had been suspicious, which you expected them to be. It took you months to break the armor around Muzan and take his trust in your hands. You had twisted it, played with it, and made him think that you loved him. You felt yourself leaving your body whenever you sweet talked him, fed him delusions; it pained you too much to be mentally present.

You knew how keen Muzan was on having a routine. You gently merged your outside time in his regular schedule, so instead of having to beg to go outside, he almost forced you. It was routine, was it not?

It would be at dead of night when you walked through deserted woods. Taking in every path, every misplaced branch, anything that could make you recognize where you were. The number of monsters walking with you variated every night. Usually, it was all four of them. Sometimes, it started with just you and Muzan, and the rest joining mid walk.

The minute you saw the lake, your plan was set in stone. You subtly suggested cooling down in the water, already loosening your kimono a little. Douma answered with throwing you over his shoulder and almost teleporting to the lake.

The rest didn't really know the intent behind it. You were never this bold with them, certainly not bold enough to suggest skinny dipping.

Your lips started to twitch due to having strained a smile for too long, but you had to pull through. Even when Douma started to undress you, his fingertips adressing every curve with care, you pulled through.

This went on for weeks. It would have been suspicious if you wanted to go swimming every night—you just waited for Douma to suggest it again, which he did, a lot. Even Kokushibo made a subtle comment about it once.

But you knew tonight was the night to make all gears turn.

Muzan had been the one wanting to go for a swim. You had purposely riled him up the whole day long just so he would make this suggestion. A calculated action turning into a wanted outcome.

The other three were out on a mission, just like you had planned.

It was just him and you.

Your legs were wrapped around him, your lips on his, your mind out of your body.

Muzan was in a state of delirium when you cried his name, begged him for more. You knew what he liked, what he expected, and like no other night, you gave it all. You defiled yourself, made your body an object he could own.

Just for this one chance.

When he was at the peak of his high, when you knew his senses were jumbled and overloaded, you pushed a mouthful of wisteria into his mouth—death's kiss.

-

Hihi

[god-has-entered-my-body]

lenaaaaaa god help me I’m so high rn I’m thinking about mpind matty pole dancing ans also giving girlie a lap dance fhis isnt good or my health I think

dont be shy pass the spliff

also mpind comeback after a bunch of wank everyone be happy x

Love me - Matty Healy

A/N: bit wanky, barely spell checked except for @beforeyougo-turnthebiglightoff 's weird sim reactions to whatever i write. Legend anon i hope this is filthy enough for you my love xx

wc: 4.5k

content warnings: smut, fluff, tw: my shitty comedy, handjobs, strip clubs, its george's birthday!!, begging, teasing, lap dance, matty in lingerie pt. 43, mentions of alcohol, lots of swearing, cumplay, grinding, it gets a bit sappy guys soz, sub!Matty

“A strip club? Are you never scared of being a cliché?” you scoff as the venue comes into view, strobing neon flashing in your face. The summer night is warm, a breeze kissing your skin as the gravel crackles under your feet, your quite high heels still not making you taller than George. 

His birthday, the big one eight, was today, and his chosen place was of course, a local strip club.

“If that cliché is seeing half naked girls, no.” he sniggers, Matty’s bickering with Ross and Hann faintly heard behind you. You hook your arm into his as you approach the bouncer, the line surprisingly short. 

“I forget you're an actual man sometimes.”

“How can you possibly forget?!” he lets go, flexing his muscles at you as some sort of display of masculinity, making you giggle behind your hand.

Matty takes this ample opportunity to swoop in from behind, pressing the side of his body up against yours. The four of you watch George proudly present his real I.D to the bouncer, a wide smile on his face as he takes it from him. The bloke gives him a weird once-over, waving him and the rest through without a hitch. 

It's bright inside, but not in the way you would assume. Different colored lights strobe around, switching every 20 seconds or so, the heavy bass of the music thrumming through your veins. Matty hangs on your arm as you look around, George immediately booking it to a booth with a stage as the table, wanting the best front row seat to the show. You roll your eyes at his eagerness, but then again, who could blame him? 

Everyone files into the booth, George ending up wedged in the corner of the seating, uncomfortable but glass he could stretch his legs out under the table. 

“Round of pints on me, happy birthday G. '' Everyone cheers, excluding Hann, who glares at Matty from across the table.

“Oh so now you have money? What about last week?” Ross lets out a quiet snigger, liking this turn of events. 

“Shut up you cunt, it's G’s birthday! Lighten up a bit, old man.” 

“Matty when I get my fucking hands on you-” Ross to the rescue, he presses a hand to his mate’s chest, keeping him seated. 

“Alright girls, break it up.” he gives up, mouthing a curt ‘fuck you’ at Matty, rolling his eyes. 

The waitress returns from the bar, bringing a platter of glasses with her. She sets them down, smiling at you before walking away, the neon lights of the club making her eyes shimmer. 

“Cheers, happy 18th mate.” Matty plants a wet kiss on George’s face, making him squirm away in disgust. 

“Get off you grade A wanker, your girl’s right there.” You blow him a kiss as Matty turns to you, licking a fat stripe up the side of your face, from your jaw to your cheekbone. Everyone at the table groans at his odd display of affection, Ross dramatically shielding his eyes and muttering incoherently as Matty finally sits back down, downing the rest of his pint. 

Sure enough, right in the middle of Hann’s interesting story about his last date, a dancer comes over to the table. She climbs up, eyeing George, twirling around the pole a few times before doing this flip you didn't even know was humanly possible. The bralette she’s wearing glimmers in the light, reflecting off and into your eyes, distracting you.  

George stares blatantly, eyes raking up and down her body as she dances, not letting her leave his line of sight. It's so obvious and she smirks at him, turning her body to face his direction before bending over, exposing her cleavage even more.  

“Don't be a knob.” you hiss, not wanting to seem rude.

“She’s fit and it's quite literally her job!” a small laugh escapes the woman as she goes to speak, flattered at the exchange. 

“It’s alright love, look all you want.” 

“See!” George shouts a bit too loudly, proud of his correctness in strip club etiquette.

You sigh, nodding at her as Matty pokes your side. 

“She is fit.” you whisper quietly, gesturing to her. Matty perks up, shoving you in offense.

“I'm fitter, don't forget.” you giggle at the statement, refusing to give him the satisfaction of agreeing with him.  

“She’s literally sparkling, I need to know what brand that is.” The rhinestone adorned lingerie set she was wearing captivated everyone at the table, hugging her curves in all the right places.  

“Who’s to say I'm not either?” your eyes widen slightly at the implication, but you brush him off.

“Shut it, don't be a tosser.” his hand grips yours right before he speaks, bringing it down to the waistband of his jeans. “I’m not.”

He uses your fingers to pull it down about an inch, revealing a pretty string of purple under his bottoms. Your breath hitches at the realization, eyes snapping up to meet his. Was he serious? Now?

“It’s George’s birthday.” you state, voice hushed so the others could overhear your conversation. Hann was already off to buy another round, leaving Ross and George to make ‘friendly’ conversation with the dancer, shamelessly staring at her tits the entire time. “He won't mind, just look at him.” 

Sure enough, George is ogling the dancer, lips parted and being such a boy it hurts. She’s clearly enjoying the attention as he leans forward, stuffing a wad of cash into the flimsy waistband of her thong, smirking. 

“He’s already imagining a future with her, look!”

She sets a paper crown on his head with the words ‘birthday boy’ on it, giving him a small kiss on the cheek. A boyish blush spreads onto George’s face as her kiss leaves a mark of lipstick, Ross quickly snapping a photo of him to take the piss when they left.   

“He desperately needs a lay, it's sad.” you comment, knowing it had been ages since his last girlfriend or even hookup, too focused on his coursework and music to go out more than the few times you forced him to. 

“So do I, so I'd prefer it if we didn't drag this out.” 

Matty gets up, climbing over you despite your quite loud protests, announcing his trip to the dance floor. You wait a few moments before following him, the sway of his hips and faint back muscles under his mesh shirt flexing as he walks, convincing you to just go with it, hoping whatever he had planned wasn't totally scandalous and wouldn't get you kicked out of the place. 

He turns right past the dance floor, leading you into a narrow corridor off to the side. You catch up to him, close behind him as he slips a dancer some cash, nodding as he makes his way to the door at the end of the hall. Matty rushes in before you, the door almost slamming in your face. ‘Private room’ flashes back at you in yellow neon, making you raise your eyebrows.

The room is dark for the first few seconds as you hear Matty shuffling. Suddenly, the room lights up, giant mirrors covering the walls and ceiling, reflecting the light back and forth. You glance around, eyes landing on Matty. 

A tall pole is the centerpiece of the room, pink metal running from the floor to the ceiling. Matty leans on it, left hand wrapping around it as he spins, smirking at you as you watch him, something stirring inside of you. 

“Did you plan this?” you ask, a skeptical look on your face.

“Maybe.” his fingers run up his chest, playing with his nipples right in front of you. His voice drips with lust, coating your mind with only a few words, making it difficult to get even semi-coherent sentences out.

“Jesus, you're mental.” you gasp softly as he moves, fluid and sure, captivating you with every change of direction.

“But you love me, now sit.” you listen, not knowing what else you were meant to do in this situation. The chair is soft, cushions letting you settle in comfortably. 

“Everything is so pink.” you mutter, gesturing to the mirror frames and pole, every surface some variation of the same color.

“Sort of the point, yeah? To set the mood.” he smirks, trailing his hands up his waist, letting his nails graze against his skin, mimicking the same thing you do to him. “Mood for what?”

“You’ll see, be patient.” you roll your eyes at his words, the palms of your hands rubbing against the soft pillow of your chair. “That's rich.” 

“Please, for me?” He sounds so sweet, like he was asking you to bring him a glass of water, not to stay still while he touched himself in front of you. 

“We both know I can't deny you.” 

“How true.” he sucks in a deep breath, throwing his head back as he holds eye contact. 

“Watch.” 

“What do I-?” you stutter over your words, your heart beating rapidly against your chest as he feels himself up, fingers ghosting over his tattoos.

“Me, keep your eyes on me.”

He turns his attention back to the pole next to him, strutting around it as the music from the dancefloor dictates his movements, his back pressed to the cool metal. Matty parts his lips as he slides down it, running a hand over his chest performatively, watching your every reaction. 

Your breathing becomes more shallow as he moves, thousands of fantasies running through your mind. He knows the effect he has on you, everything he does is purely to rile you up, make you lose your composure. 

“You’re mad, this is-” he cuts you off with a sly smile.

“Incredibly hot? I’d rather you enjoy the show than talk over it.” you scrunch up your face at the implication that this was a performance, even if you did expect nothing less from Matty. 

“Show?”

He runs a hand through his slightly messed up hair, showing off his neck as you stare at him, biting your lip between your teeth to keep from embarrassing yourself. 

“I hate you.” you mumble as the music changes, some hip-hop song coming on. The faint cheers of the people outside are barely audible, but it serves to remind of just where you were. The guys were still at the table, most likely speculating the reason as to why the two of you have been missing that long, Ross surely already making crude comments that neither Hann nor George wanted to think about.

“You won't if you just wait.” you grip the edge of your seat, blushing profusely as he struts over to you, wrapping his arms around your neck. His breath is hot against your neck, leaning over you as he settles into your lap. You finally clock it.  

“Stay still.” he ‘orders’, attempting to mimic the way you speak to him when he doesn't listen.

“Are you giving me a lap dance?” he frowns at you, shaking his head in disappointment. A chuckle escapes you as the reality of the situation dawns on you. 

“No need to define it darling, let it be abstract.” of course he’d say something like that, try to salvage the ‘artistic’ affair, failing miserably. 

“You’re giving me a fucking lapdance, christ.” it's genuinely amusing. Your heart swells up at the thought of all the effort that went into this. Paying off the dancer with god only knows how much money, turning you on at the table just enough so you’d follow him, and probably even setting up the lighting in the room himself. 

“You're such a bore, let me have my fun.” he kisses you, giggling into your mouth. His lips are warm against yours, your lip gloss rubbing off on him. “Oh, I will.” you promise, letting your hands fall limp as he grips your shoulders, rocking his hips back and forth. His movements are exact, practiced even as he grinds down onto you before lifting his body back up, bringing his hip tattoo up to eye level. 

You don't think, mind clouded with desire and want. His shirt had ridden up a bit, and your rough tongue drags across the inked skin, warm against it as he shudders, feeling his cock twitch in his pants at the sensation. 

“No touching the dancers” he tuts, coming back down on top of you.

“I’m exempt from that rule.” you say, your voice surprisingly steady despite the white hot heat pooling between your legs.

“According to whom?” 

“You.”

You let your hands settle onto his waist, gripping him so hard you were sure there’d be bruises the next day.

“Fuckk, yeah okay,” he groans, the pressure on the front of his jeans increasing as all the blood in his head rushes south, his mind hazy. 

“C’mon baby, finish your little performance.”

He moves to get off, smirking as you let him. You can see indents in his skin where you grabbed him, the sight making your breath hitch. He circles around you like a predator does his prey, wrapping his arms around you from behind. 

His hands trail up your chest, fingers grazing over your exposed collarbones. Your skin flushes under his touch and you let out a soft moan at the feeling, earning a proud smile from Matty. 

“You’re so gorgeous. I have to force myself to not get hard whenever you look at me.” his voice is sultry against your ear, making goosebumps bloom on the skin of your neck. “Oh, way to exaggerate.” you snigger, not quite believing him. 

“Honest truth.” he swears, instinctively doing the ‘scouts honor’ sign with his hand. 

You snort, your little giggling fit interrupted by his mouth trailing sickly sweet kisses up your neck and to your jaw.

It doesn't take him long to make his way back around, your heart skipping a beat when he comes back into view. His chest is glistening with sweat, the warm temperature of the room clearly getting to him. Most notably, you notice the front of his jeans is unbuttoned and unzipped, flaring out on both sides, revealing almost the entirety of the silky, purple panties he had chosen to wear. 

He relishes in your reaction, the attention making his ego grow exponentially as he moves back into your lap. Your hands trail up his chest, doing your best to not immediately pay attention to the underwear. You can't resist, though. 

“These are new.” you toy with the thin straps, silk reflecting the colored light beautifully. You can see a note of pride ripple through him as you admire the material, grazing his cock through it.

“Got them just for you, you like?” The question is so obviously rhetorical. Of course you like, no, love them. “So much.” your words are laced with love, soft and appreciative of all the effort he puts into getting you off, fulfilling your fantasy.

The way he looks at you is sinful, thoughts dancing behind his eyes visible as he stares, waiting for your next move.

He lets out a soft groan when you push him down into your thigh, biting his lip at you provocatively. “You're hard.” you smile as you say the words, his gaze softening when he sees the blissed out look at your face, eyes raking over his body. Even (almost) fully clothed, he was absolutely beautiful. 

“See? Wasn't lying.” he presses a kiss behind your left ear, gently moving your hair out of the way. It’s loving, so honest. “You sure it's not because of the mirror behind me?” you still cant help but tease him, gesturing to the giant mirror your back was facing. He blushes in response, stealing a glance at his reflection. 

“You’re so cruel! I’ll just stop then, seeing as all you see me as is some egotistical deviant.” he threatens, crossing his arms over his chest in retaliation. You bring a hand up to cup his face, stroking his cheek softly, almost patronizing. Your mind swims with the power you have over him. 

“You wont stop, you couldn't if you tried.” For the first time that evening, you call his bluff, the way he reacts to you exquisite as his lips part, no words coming out. Silence fills the room, even the music on the other side of the door seeming to die down. How long have the two of you been here?

“Am i right?” you question, not letting him off the hook like you usually would.  

“..yeah–” his words are small, and you know you have him right where you want him. The lightest, slightest touch could send him hurtling over the edge, his hips rutting desperately into your hand as you palm him through his underwear.

“So pretty for me, doing all of this. Thank you baby.” you whisper into his ear as he gasps under your touch. It's so incredibly intimate that you can't help but drop your facade for a few seconds, kissing him sweetly, his lips moving against yours with desperation.  

“Anything for you.”

“Anything?”

“Mhm.”

You take his cock out of the confines of his underwear, a sigh of relief falling from his parted lips as your fingers ghost over the tip, teasing him. 

“Just stay still, let me make you feel good.” you murmur, feeling him up under his shirt, your nails digging into the skin of his back. He shifts on top of you, his body yearning for your touch.

“Please.”

You reach down to wrap your manicured fingers around his cock, the sight of the pretty colors of your nails around him making his eyes roll back in his head, his mind spinning with all sorts of possibilities, mostly focused on not finishing right in that moment. 

Tugging lazily on his cock, you drag your fingers from the base to the tip, a satisfying whimper spilling from Matty’s lips, the sound spreading through your entire body. His back arches against you and the kiss he presses against your mouth tastes like the cigarettes he chainsmoked on the way to the club, mixing deliciously with the hint of alcohol on his breath. 

“Let go for me, feel it.”

He trembles, the noise he lets out is desperate, filthy, shooting straight to your core. Everything is heightened. You can feel his breath on your cheek as he leans forward into you, chest pressing against yours as you run your fist up and down his cock, small whimpers of pleasure spurring you on. 

“Fuckk, that feels so good–” 

Matty’s words are choked, his effort to hold back a bit obvious. He’s hungry, wanting, evident in the way he ruts into your hand, his fingers digging into the skin of your shoulders, the sharp pain making you sigh, pleased. 

“Be nice and loud for me, let me hear you.” you coo into his ear, your free hand dragging up his back under his shirt, the mesh bunching up. “So good to me, treat me so well, god– shit.”

He twitches as you dig your thumb into his slit, a shiver spreading through his body 

The way he’s not even undressed is obscene, the fabric of his jeans gathering under his hips as he’s perched on top of you, feet planted firmly on the floor for leverage. You watch him, engrossed in pleasure, completely blissed out expression on his face. His head is thrown back, exposing his pale neck, faded hickeys and marks still visible from your last encounter. 

“You're staring” he breathes, your eyes snapping up to meet him. A filthy grin tugs at the corners of his lips, your focus on him and only him. His hair falls over his face, obscuring it slightly, much to your disdain.  

“You're giving me reason to” you brush curls out of his face as your movements still, letting him speak properly, uninterrupted. 

“Yeah, I want you to look at me.”

You smile lovingly, cocking your head slightly to the left as you tease him, one of your fingers twirling his hair. 

“Gets you off, my attention?” he doesn't even try to deny it, knowing it wouldn't get him anywhere. 

“Mhm-m” he nods, panting. His chest heaves with every breath he takes, silently begging you to continue.

His hips stutter as you grip his cock tighter, your other hand stroking his face sweetly as you stare into each other's eyes, his face flush as pornographic moans spill from his lips. His back arches again, your bodies pressed against each other as your hand snakes between the two of you.

“F-fuck, i’m so close, please let me cum, please.” His voice is high-pitched and whiny, tears threatening to spill at the overwhelming pleasure. 

“You beg so nicely, let me hear you baby.” you whisper words of encouragement as his hips buck up into your hand involuntarily, every ounce of self control in him dissipating. 

“I need it so bad, please i've been so good for you.”

He hiccups in a way that almost makes you feel bad, his desperation so obvious. You speed up a bit, just a bit, giving him that sweet, sweet relief he’s been begging for for god knows how long now.

“P-please, oh fuck, yesyesyes fuck.” precum bubbles at the tip of his cock, and you smear it down, coating him in his own arousal. It's unbelievably hot, his entire body twitching at the sight of your fingers on his cock, a sight he desperately tries to commit to memory. 

“You’re leaking all over my hand darling, so filthy.” he whines into your neck, and you lick across his jaw, making him shiver

“Make a mess, c’mon, come for me.” an animalistic groan fills your ears as he rapidly approaches his orgasm, writhing under your touch.

“Y-yeah– fuck thats so good, your hand feels so good, fucking made for me.”

Matty’s possessive nature made your head spin with lust, his eyeliner smudging down his face as he stares into your eyes with such an intensity it felt like he was going to consume you.

His skin glows under the soft pink lighting, making him seem ethereal, like a true angel. His noises are like music to your ears as he spills into your hand, spurts of cum coating your bare stomach, barely missing your (quite expensive) cropped shirt. Matty kisses you immediately after, hands threading through your hair as he drinks you in, stealing your breath straight from your lungs. 

Wordlessly, one of his hands moves down, gathering the remnants of his orgasm onto two fingers, tapping your mouth with the other. You indulge him, parting your lips to let him push his digits past them, the salty taste of him taking over your senses. His pupils are completely blown out in desire, not able to process what was happening in front of him, a loopy smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, his eyes crinkling in that way that made your heart swell up with love 

“Perfect.” he mumbles as you lick his fingers clean, smiling mischievously at his dazed gaze. Matty pulls you in, holding you close, desperate to not let go.

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Where were you two?” Ross’s voice is accusatory as the two of you finally return to the booth, the dancer from before having already left. A faint blush spreads onto your cheeks as the memories of not 20 minutes go flash through your mind. Hann doesn't help your situation at all.

“Probably shagging, just look at him.” your head turns, seeing Matty’s blissed out expression, a content smile replacing his usual nasty grin. You elbow him in the ribs, a silent plea to say something, but he promptly ignores your silent begging. 

“Shut up you dickhead, you don't know shit.” 

George points at Matty, now grinning wildly, reminiscing about the events of tonight. He’s oddly calm, which would be concerning if it wasn't for the monstrous case of post-sex hair he currently had 

“Jesus, what did you even do to him?” George is taking the absolute piss out of you, and for good enough reason. 

“I don't kiss and tell.” you attempt to change the conversation topic as you settle back into the booth, commenting on the pint glasses. You're ignored in favor of laughing at you further while matty remains completely unbothered, the glow he emitted so fucking obvious it hurt.  

“Well he sure does, I've heard much more than necessary.” Ross sniggers, pulling a face at the not-so-distant memory of Matty’s sex bonfire-storytelling session that had happened a few weeks prior (not at an actual bonfire, but on the floor of your living room, completely pissed while you were out with your girlfriends.)

“Did you at least wash your hands?” Hann asks, the question directed at Matty, whose hands were loosely wrapped around his nearly empty pint glass. 

“Didn't have to.” he grins, waving his hands in Adam’s face proudly, like it was some sort of achievement. 

“Oh fucking hell, too much info.” George groans, cupping his face in his hands at the mental image of what he thought had just happened. You laugh inwardly, the whole situation absurd. This was the furthest you had ever gotten in discussing anything relating to your relationship with Matty, and it honestly felt weird.

“I’m never touching you again mate, no fucking way.” Ross stated, a disgusted look on his face. “Awwe Ross, how will you do without my touch?” You make grabby hands at him, climbing over George to drape yourself over the booth, touching his hair and face, Matty’s and Hann’s hysterical laughter spurring you on. “GET OFF ME!!” he yells, clawing at you to push you away, absolutely mortified. 

George, slightly more pissed than the rest of you, announces his mission to get the dancers number, swearing up and down that “She had this look in her eye, i’m so fucking serious.” he manages to stumble over his shoes about three times before finally standing up straight, brushing off any ‘dust’ (crisps) that clung to his raggedy band tee. 

“Good luck mate, not that you need it.” Hann tries to be encouraging, knowing just as well as the rest of you how George got when he had a few too many pints. Terribly emotional and impulsive, there was no stopping him once he had his sights set on something, or in this case, someone.

“I definitely don't” he glares at you over his shoulder, strutting across the dance floor in direction of where he’d last seen her. 

As he walks away, Ross sniggers.

“He definitely does.” and you can't help but giggle along as he trips over a stray stair, falling right onto his face. Hann goes to help him up, ignoring your collective jeers to “Stop ruining his chances at true love!”

With an ice pack pressed to his face, George can only roll his eyes at the various comments for the rest of the night, despite it being his birthday.

[the---hermit]

26|05|2023

21/50 days of productivity

Today was a bit chaotic. I am happy with everything I manged to do in the morning, because I was losing focus, but I still got a lot done. On the other hand, when I got to the hair salon to get my haircut I had to wait over 40 minutes because they were late, and that made me very unproductive in the afternoon. My goal was to write down notes for an entire chapter, and by the time I got home and everything I simply didnìt have enough time and energies to do so. I did a part, and I'll finish the rest on Monday morning. I am still planning on taking the weekend off from studying, because I really need a little break if I want to be able to work well in the next couple of weeks. I plan on doing a bit of work in the garden, and continue reading my book, and then who knows?

Productivity:

practiced Irish on duolingo (still on the bare minimum side of things but it's all my brain can handle atm)

posted this update of the 2023 genre bingo

set up the next weekly spread in my bullet journal

finished writing notes for the second chapter of M. Detienne's Creation Of Mythology

read the whole third chapter

started to write notes (and highlight them) for the third chapter

planned what I'll have to study next week to stay on track (and somehow got ink all over myself while doing that. no, I don't own a fountain pen, I am just a fool)

started downloading the recorded lectures of another class (I am downloading them just in case, I don't want to risk them being deleated. One of these days I'll download the rest)

Self care:

read first thing in the morning

got an haircut (I'm embracing the short hair for the summer, I even went a bit shorter in the back, and I am really feeling it atm)

📖:The Creation Of Mythology by Marcel Detienne, The Left Hand Of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin (little update for those who have been asking. So far I am intrigued by the story, I knew very little before going into it. I am struggling a bit because it's not the lightest read and at the moment my mental energies are not at their best. I find myself struggling the most with longer chapters, so I am pretty sure this is a me problem rn. Anyway I am enjoying it so far, I particularly like those in-between chapters that tell short stories and legends or that simply give you a bit more insight on the world it takes place it)

🎵:Calm Down (A Little Bit Calmer Now) by All Time Low (there will come a day in which I won't be obsessed by something they release, but this is not that day)

[astxrwar]

Ngl, your physical therapy Bucky had me giggling and kicking my feet, blushing in the club rn.

I'm a SUCKER for touch starved - forced proximity - nice older guy and holy shit how are you even alive RCs. Lololol, you live like this vibes. Totally not for personal reasons...👀

Ugh. That gave me life. I'm not encouraging that story in the future but man... I am encouraging that story in the future lololol

AUGH YOU’RE ENCOURAGING MY BRAINROT i was walking to lab today and my brain came up with More Stuff for this because of course it did

imagining everything sort of comes to a head when you run into him while Out bar hopping or at a club or something with friends. and he’d be there with steve and sam and nat and your friends are Drunk and upon meeting him are like “omg you’re right he IS really hot!1!!” which is just like. AUGH PLEASE SHUT UP!!!! DO NOT SAY THAT IN FRONT OF HIM! anyway both groups end up leaving at the same time and you end up on the same subway line and then getting off at the same stop because you apparently live near each other. imagining almost tripping catastrophically on that little gap between the train and the platform and he’s like. jesus christ okay I understand how you keep injuring yourself you’re hopeless. making jokes about how he feels like it'd be irresponsible to let you walk the rest of the way home alone (his apartment is closer to the station than yours) and you're just like. laughing it off. he's just generally a flirty guy, teases everyone, yeah it makes you feel all warm and good-nervous but it's not like he's serious. except it's summer and rainy season and when you guys get to his apartment it starts to POUR!! and in NYC especially lately (thanks climate change!) the rain can get INSANE so im imagining him being like. ah geez do you want to just come in for a bit until the rain stops there's no way you're walking in this. and he’s Drunk and you’re also Drunk but it’ll be fine! your phone weather app thing says it'll be over in twenty minutes and yeah you definitely don't want to walk in it, you'd get home soaked and city rain is nasty.

you nearly trip taking off your shoes (i do this all the time. augh) and cue more playful teasing about how absolutely Hopeless you are. puttering around in the kitchen like ‘do you want… i dunno, like, a tea, or something?” (sure) (why not) meanwhile it’s still POURING. you guys start talking about just like. whatever. random stuff. and eventually he mentions how you're a lot more comfortable rn than during PT, to which you reply (because you're drunk) that it's because he's not, like. touching you. Bucky's some combination of flattered/pleased/endeared by that, cocky little grin and "oh, yeah?" and all, and you're just like. whatever, man, at this point it's not like it's a secret, and he'd said that people are like this with him a lot, so. Except-- he says this as he's crossing the kitchen, maybe you're not looking at him, watching the rain, but you can hear his voice getting closer behind you-- what he'd actually said is that a lot of people find him attractive. not that a lot of people REACT to him the way you do.

when you turn back from the window he's standing pretty close, leaned against the same stretch of kitchen counter, and he reaches out for the little ceramic mug of tea you have clutched in your hands, but doesn't take it from you. you manage to stumble through asking him what he's doing; minimizing collateral damage, he says, his mouth twitching up at the corners; you immediately drop the mug as soon as his fingers brush the curve of your cheek, and that little almost-smile breaks into a a full-blown grin as he sets it safely on the countertop.

you're real fuckin' cute, you know that? he says.

oh-- c'mon, that's no fair, you mumble in protest, now you're--

he tips your chin up with his fingers and you lose track of whatever you'd been saying like somebody'd reached in your head and grabbed hold of your train of thought, pulled it until it snapped right in two.

--you're doing it on purpose, you finish feebly.

yeah, he agrees. yeah, I am.

(the rain is long over by the time you actually end up leaving. oop.)

[palajae]

You are such an incredible writer ... honestly thank you for taking time out from your busy schedule and posting here ...I have read all of your works and girl let me tell you ...what did YOU DO TO BE THIS TALENTED 🫡😭....NO like I am not exaggerating.... it's so hard to find a good fic according to my taste and your fics are absolutely my type . THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR POSTING HERE ....school is def killing you ig cuz same girl I am in my last year and I am absolutely so done with myself...so let's suffer together...and hopefully you will get time in future to post here more . FIGHTING!!!💓💓

seeing this ask made me cry 😭😭 because honestly i don’t remember the last time i logged onto here let alone posted. first, i just wanted to thank you for your support since you are really hyping me up too much 🥹 mainly bc i think i have grown a lot but i definitely have a lot to work on lol. i’m always so so happy to hear from readers when they enjoy something i put so much work and effort into, especially because i genuinely love writing as well. when i first started on tumblr, it was during covid on an old blog of mine and i had no fucking clue what i was doing. but i made so many friends and had such a great time writing, even when it sucked ass lmao. that’s why even when i got wayy busier throughout the rest of high school i tried to keep it up (although my posting schedule was so inconsistent). i felt so pressured to keep up a consistent schedule and stay in touch with mutuals that it no longer became fun, so i started afresh with this blog. tumblr became just like a side quest where whenever i had a burst of inspiration, i would post and then log off lmao. looking back now, with this blog being 2 years old, i’m so grateful for the growth and love i received that i honestly did not expect.

now, i still love writing so much— i have so many wips and ideas but life is just lifing rn 😭😭 school and personal priorities has always been my main focus, and now in college i’m still figuring how to survive on a daily basis sondkend everyday is crazy for me so writing hasn’t even crossed my mind for a while. this doesn’t mean i’m leaving for good, especially because of school breaks and summer! i probably will return like once in a blue moon to post something i randomly get inspired by. but i’m never going to be consistently active on this account, and that’s okay. unfortunately i’m growing out of tumblr/writing in general, but it was and still is a great experience to reflect and look back on. i learned a lot and met some great people, but most of all, i was able to make others happy as well :)

sorry for the long ass response to your ask but i figured this was the best way to get an explanation out for everyone since i basically ghosted you guys for some time (im sorry pls forgive me) thank you again and good luck to you too!

i love you guys and hopefully see you soon <3

sincerely,

jae

[nekkodiaries]

⌖ the 7th shot. ┆ second base. [ 0.7k words + 2 pics. ]

killstrike: oi, i waited for 30 mins for ur stupid ass n u didnt come ://

killstrike: hey .. its been 2 days 😐 this isnt funny r u actually mad at me

killstrike: im sorry for calling u stupid 😕 even tho u kind of are

killstrike: 😕😕😕 its been 5 days since ur last active. are you okay?

jay sighs as he finishes sending the last message. summer break's about to end and the way she's been inactive makes him feel like this little friendship they've made's about to end too. maybe he should have taken heeseung's advice and asked for her number. or any other social media account.

this feels all too repetitive of the last 'incidents' he's had with her. she ghosts him and he gets anxious, staring at the screen until that little button beside her icon turns green, messaging her a couple of times even though he isn't getting a reply back. each message he sends knocking down hard on his pride, but he continues to type away. it almost leaves him upset at how he's actively trying to build a friendship with her, and her not caring enough to update him.

but he shoos his anxious thoughts away, convincing himself that maybe he's overthinking this. that even though she teased and insulted him quite a lot, she'd never completely ghost jay without reason.

just like magic, his phone vibrates. jay sits up from his bed, eyes glued on the little chat box he has with notursniper. she just comes back with a lame "haha hi." without anything else. was she not going to address how she was gone for a week? was she going to dip again?

killstrike: haha hi your face.

jongseong did not mean for his words to come out so 'upset' and pointed, but he actually was.

notursniper: hey 🥺 did you not miss your favorite sniper,, hmph

killstrike: you were gone for a week and you didn't tell me 😐

notursniper: i didn't have a choice !! i sprained my hand and my wrist hurts too much to hold my phone 🥺 can't even game grrRRr.

oh. that's why she was away. he wonders why she keeps getting into little accidents— from catching fever to spraining her hand. so clumsy, this one. he chuckles and puts his phone down briefly, rubbing his palm on his face as it dawns on him just how stupid he was for getting so deep into his mind about her short absence.

notursniper: oh god, you waited for me the day i slipped hhhhHhh I'M SORRY 🥺😭

killstrike: nah it's no big deal. i DID worry bc of ur sudden absence though. not fun. 😐😐😐 killstrike: anyw. do u wanna play now? i haven't duo-ed since u went AWOL on me

notursniper: guess you're gonna go awol on duo for longer because i can't play rn notursniper: i'm lich relly typing w one hand because my wrist hurts like a raging bitch.

his thumbs come to the screen to tell her to take a rest but heeseung's words come to mind. maybe he can ask for her twitter? pubg isn't as fun without her as his partner, plus he wouldn't have to log in everyday just to reply to her. god knows he's only been using the game to talk to her and not to actually game.

he stares at his phone for a while, thumbs slightly trembling at the thought of asking her to talk somewhere else other than the app itself. jay is nervous this would change their dynamics. but is it really that deep? maybe it is. maybe it's not. maybe he's just overthinking this again. but she might think otherwise— maybe she assumes he wants something more than a platonic gamer-friendship with her (which he does) but he doesn't want to outright give up his pride for that. then again, if he doesn't do this, he realizes she might ghost again and he's the one who'll end up having a hard time. so with his toes curled in nervousness, he types out a message.

killstrike: would it be easier to talk on twitter? only if you're comfortable. :)

notursniper: are going to second base rn? 😳😳

killstrike: . loRD. i should not have apologized that day 🧎🏻

notursniper: i'm kidding ! 🤣 give me you're @ and i'll follow you.

killstrike: same as my ign.

notursniper: boo 👎 boring 👎

killstrike: i don't take insults from 9-year olds. now go follow me and let's talk there so you can rest your wrist.

masterlist. ┆ previous. — next.

summary: park jay lives life as a hot-headed gamer by day and.. well.. still a hot-headed gamer by night— except he secretly goes by the name killstrike. after losing a match, he finds himself trash-talking his teammate notursniper, who happens to be the mysterious classmate he's been admiring for over a year and more.

taglist [open] : @yvnjin-s @wondering-out-loud @rikisly @babystrlla @shinrjj @homelycat @annoyingbitch83 @fadedluvv @haerinism

permanent taglist: @duolingofanaccount @enhasengene

[jayflrt]

🎀 update since it’s been a while

haiiiii i haven’t been on tumblr in 5ever. i feel like im only ever on here now when u update LMAO. speaking of LIVING for jay/yn. it’s AMAZE. i’m also every excited for the next update. but anywho how have you been! we haven’t spoke in forever i really can’t remember what my last update was abt so im just gonna skim thru things!

like since the start of this year ive been SUPERERRR into f1 so i made a podcast! (podcast in question is my cf on my spam account 🥸) 😅😅 i’ve always liked it because my brother did but i’ve gotten more into it. i also took a listen to romance untold and it’s SO good my favs r defff moonstruck and royalty 🔥.

lowk this summer has been chill like any other. i went to a couple parties with my friends but then after that not much happened. there’s no guy updates bc unfortunately my life is no longer a wattpad story because that was very hard on my emotions 😅😅. i’ve lowk sworn off relationships for a while. obviously not completely but i don’t know recently a friend pointed out to me that whenever im in one its very tolling on my emotions and it’s not good so i don’t want that to happened again. i was also just not in a good place when arsal/cameron/marcus happened. REST ASSURED I AM BETTER NOW!!! #weUP

about my friends it’s going nice! we’re kinda doing our own thing since it’s the summer however one of them, m (i think i name drop too comfortably on here), recently started talking (ish) to a guy and she’s kinda obsessed with him. like it’s in a weird way in where she full blown cancelled plans that we made like 5 days prior just bc she had last minute plans with him so 😃😃😃😃 i’m so happy for her!! (NOT). i have to be honest there’s nothing wrong with him other than the fact he looks like he SNUCK ONTO EARTH WHEN THEY FIRST WALKED ON THE MOON. so 🤗🤗🤗🤗

i have been writing a LOT more recently. like not even just because it’s kpop i don’t know i get the inspiration to write and just open a google docs document. like for instance one of them the plot is mc breaks up with sunghoon and becomes closer to heeseung but plot twist! they’re in a band and there’s DRAMAA 🔥🔥🔥. and then another one is where mc and jake r ENEMIES bc her dog tried impregnating jake’s dog at a dog park 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥. one of them is a sunghoon fic that’s heavily inspired by cmbyn (MINUS THE GROOMING) the other is a jay prank call au where he calls her bc he remembers his highschool sweetheart and she doesn’t even spare him a thought 🔥🔥🔥🔥. there’s a single dad sunghoon au somewhere in there. MY GOOGLE DOCS IS COOKING.

however i don’t think i could ever post it to tumblr. maybe one day when anyone is interested ill send in a little snippet of one of them 🤗 or dm u one of them and reveal my identity 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮. but i don’t know! i’ve tried writing on tumblr before but i was in highschool when i tried soooooo. i also think that im just too busy. maybe one day when im not so busy 🔥.

but yeah that’s really it 🤗🤗. but update me if anything cool is happening in ur life. r YOU having a hot girl summer. i also think u said you went on a trip recently (?) IDK. but pleeeekkk update me - 🎀

hihi 🎀 anon !! omg please i'm honored you're sticking around to update me 🥹 they're MUCH appreciated i love reading them <3 and thank you sm for tuning into yfi786 🥰🥰

omg i have a few friends who are super into f1 too!! the races look like they must be so fun to go to :') YKWW the close friends story podcast is always sm more fun to tune into than an actual podcast 🙂‍↕️ my fav rn is brought the heat back it's just been playing in my head 24/7 and that vocal run from jay hello!!!! moonstruck and royalty are SO good though they're definitely up there for me too

i'm glad your summer's been chill !! it's always nice to just have time to unwind before getting back to the uni grind 🥲 honestly relationships/situationships can take so much out of you mentally so i'm glad you don't have to feel that way anymore!! and im glad you get to spend the summer with your friends 💗

OMG NOOOO YOUR FRIEND NEEDS TO RUN FOR THE HILLS 😭 why would she cancel your guys plans like that?? LMFAOOO PLS we're always losing an angel to an ugly man 😞💔 no that's so upsetting tho :( i hope she gets over him he's not worth cancelling plans with friends over!!!!

omg wait SLAY 😌 the rush of writing inspiration always feels so so good and i hope it lasts a long time for you!!! HELP NOT THE DOGS MATING AT THE PARK 😭 but okay i see you grinding through those plots!!! 🔥 the google drive is being FED and oml if you ever feel like sharing,, my asks are open 🤭 also yeah that makes sense!! i don't bother with aesthetics because it's just sooo time consuming,, like don't get me wrong i'd love to have a super cute theme and stuff but it's def a lot of work :')

omg yes i went on a little trip with my friends :')) we did that thing where we pulled our vacation plan out of a hat LMFAO but it was fun!! i'm very sick of flying tho! 🫤 NO hot girl summer just hot corporate slave summer 😩 i have been trying to pick up new hobbies though because i just dropped my habit of doomscrolling on tiktok 🤧

[lynne-monstr]

hi, it's the anon who's stopping by! how have you been?? I hope you're having a nice week. this last month has been very hectic for me, work was very busy, which both helps with my situation and doesn't. on the one hand work is pretty much the one thing that's going okay in my life rn so focusing on that helps distract from everything else. on the other hand, when all of a sudden work becomes a struggle too, it's tough. but as always, it's best to focus on the positives (easier said than done lol). for example: it's summer! I was actually able to wear a dress to work today, finally!!

I wanted to ask: I remember you mentioned a while ago that you recently cracked the code to making salads tasty, and I was wondering if you could share some tips that worked for you? I'm trying to eat more healthily bc I haven't been doing a very good job of that lately, and I struggle with vegetables tbh. I like the idea of a salad in theory but when I try it it's either bland or straight up acidic (looking at you, lettuce). I don't mind making it "more unhealthy", veggies are still veggies. I just want to be able to eat them without the experience being absolutely miserable 🥲

as always sending you good vibes! I always enjoy seeing you on my dash! have a lovely week!! 💞

hi anon, it' good to see you again! I've been super busy lately, mostly work stuff. we're gearing up for a big deadline and so the meetings and the business travel have ramped up. my flight home on friday got super delayed and I got in late, and i think it's a sign that I'm getting older because the late night really threw off my whole weekend. I had plans to get out and explore but i just bummed around for 2 whole days, which was admittedly pretty nice.

I totally feel you on the busy work stuff being both a blessing and a curse. work was a great distraction for me when I needed it but lol I wish it came without all the stress and the pressure and the rest. it sounds like you're hanging in there, and I am sending lots of good vibes your way! looking on the bright side is SO HARD but ughhh it's one of those things I've found actually pays off. I hope work stays relatively chill for you.

and yay for summer! (it's my favorite time of year). dresses are the best! it's always so fun to break out the summer wardrobe. i've been living in long flowy skirts for a few weeks now!

okay salads! I love tasty salads. I should probably preface this with the confession that i genuinely enjoy vegetables. but i hope you can still find some of this useful. my biggest issue with salads was that i'm lazy and also hate spoiled browning salad mix, so those were the two big problems i was looking to solve for myself. i'll put my process in bulletpoionts because i love bulletpoints.

chopping the lettuce! game changer.

baby spinach stays fresh the whole week. also i can use it in morning fruit smoothies to get extra veggies.

i chop all my veggies (usually red bell pepper, cucumber, tomatoes, feta cheese) at the beginning of the week because i'm lazy. also, i roast extra veggies at dinner and use the leftovers in my salads for variety

i supplement fresh veggies with canned: heart of palm, artichokes, baby corn, roasted red peppers

carbs in the salad! couscous, pearl couscous, orzo, rice. it makes it more fun and gives good texture

also beans! (omg butter beans in salad is amazing!). canned because i'm lazy

crispy tortilla strips! yum

for protein, i braise a batch of chicken thighs and shred them up , and pop them in the salad as needed. also i keep grocery store frozen fried chicken in the freezer for if I run out of fresh.

i don't like completely cold salads so i gently reheat the chicken before i use it to give it some temperature variation

homemade tahini lime salad dressing because it's delicious. also I will 100% take the leftover salad dressings from catered work lunches.

I guess that's a longwinded way of saying that i make sure to actually put stuff I like eating in my salads. I switch things up for variety, but the combo of chopped lettuce, carbs, protein, veggies and a good dressing goes a long way. tbh, a good dressing is 100% the most important part of a good salad. I stopped buying those crappy low fat salad dressings because they taste like cardboard. I either make my own or splurge on the nice full fat ones and use them in moderation.

good luck with your salads! i've definitely felt a lot more energetic since i got better about eating more fruits/vegetables. (granted, some of that might also be the vitamin supplements I started taking on the advice of my doctor.) i hope it works for you!

thanks for stopping by, I was wondering how you were doing and I'm so glad to hear the updates!

[mxmspeedster]

f1 wedding

i really couldn't tell you what happened, i made it at 6 am

who is getting married? Lance stroll and daniel ricciardo I thought it would be funny. It’s not. This took too long and way too much effort.

couple’s attire? Daniel would were a tan suit and lance would wear a green one. i thought it was fitting five hours ago.

who walks them down the isle? Daniel and Chloe would bribe scotty into walking lance down the aisle by letting him make a cringy speech at the reception. (he’d do it anyways, he just wanted to see what he could get out of it)

best man/maid of honour? Daniel’s best man would be max and lance’s best man would be esteban. I have a plan with this, stay with me. (i do not actually have a plan)

rest of wedding party? Lando would be the flower boy. Argue with the wall. Mick would be the ringbearer. I’d imagine the wedding party itself would be small, maybe only 10 people. Fernando and checo would also be in it, not sure where, but they would. And pierre, i’m not sure how i almost forgot him in the list. The rest would be family.

wedding party attire? Tan suits, with little suspenders?!?! (i still stand by this)

Engagement? It was a whole ordeal. Most people would think daniel would be the one to propose, but they’re wrong. It would be lance. He’d plan a nice dinner in spain on the summer break, they’d get all dressed up and go. Then, they’d go for a walk along the pier at sunset, lance would get down on one knee, and this is where you’d think he’d propose but wrong, he just ties his shoes. Daniel would spend all night wondering when lance will ask but it never comes.

In truth, lance got scared to ask because there were a lot of people around and he wasn’t sure if daniel would feel pressured into saying yes if everyone was watching.

Just as daniel accepts that it’s not happening that night, thye go back to their hotel room and the view from the windows is so nice, daniel goes and stands in front of them to look at it. Lance decides he’d do it right there, daniel framed by the stars was prettier than any sunset that lance had ever seen. He got down on one knee and when daniel turned around to grab his camera, lance just skipped the whole four minute long speech he spent a month memorizing and just asked the question. Of couse daniel said yes.

And do not think for one moment they didn’t fight about who’s last name they’d take.

guest count? 400, Not too big, not too small. Daniel is a social creature so most of rbr is there, that’s 150 accounted for. Lance would also have a lot of aston martin employees there, so thats another 100 and the rest are family and friends and we can’t forget the drivers.

guest attire? All black. It’s classy, takes out the stress of finding something to wear, everyone looks good in black.

Budget? Lance is on a mission to out do chloe here, just know they went over by quite a bit. Daniel was happy to just pay for what ever it was that lance desired, regardless of their budget that they probably didn’t need to set in the first place.

Venue? They get married by a lake in france, and the reception happens at a nice hotel. It's spring so everything is in full bloom, it’s such a whimsical place. (i had an image pick out but i can't upload it rn)

destination wedding/place? They have their wedding in france because monaco doesn’t have gay marriage laws, but their reception happens at a nice hotel in monaco.

time of day? Sunset. They get married as the sun sets, because that's when lance was going to propose.

who officiates it? Christian does it and spends the whole time trying not to cry. He’s so proud of his daniel.

Rings? Simple gold bands with their numbers engraved on the inside. It’s cute and subtle and doesn’t get in the way of work.

First look? The first look happens in a private moment at the hotel they’re getting ready at. It was just meant to be a little “first touch” where they held hands and read love letters to each other around the corner, but they ended up doing it face to face.

playlist?

Flowers? Lance goes wild on the flowers, he spent months picking them all out. He gets his bouquet preserved and they frame it on the wall in their bedroom. (again, i had pictures, wtf tumblr)

first dance? They have it in private, no cameras, no guests, no wedding party. Just them. They had practiced when they couldn’t sleep leading up to the wedding and even after, they still do it in their living room with no music.

Cake? They have a small cake that they cut and shared between the two of them. The guest’s had sheet cakes with three different flavors for options.

getaway car? An Aston Martin, they sat in the back seat and laughed the entire ride from the event to the reception.

Honeymoon? They go to paris for a month in the summer break. Just them in a little loft together.

[dumdumsun]

Wax and Wane Sneak Peek ("Break and Mend" Sequel)

A/N: HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY, BABES!! Yes, it is I, Sun. I have returned from... hibernation. Or whatever I've been doing to cause this hiatus. Believe it or not, I actually have been writing. As of rn, I am two chapters away from finishing Wax and Wane. Just need to edit and then you all will have your weekly updates.

It would've been so cool if I posted the first chapter today since... y'know... season 3 takes place on the 4th, but... that didn't end up happening. SO! Instead, I decided to give y'all a sneak peek of Chapter Two! I would've chosen something from Chapter One, but Dustin is hardly in it, so I wanted a whole Party interaction to show y'all what I've been working on.

Just a heads up, there is a hetero relationship between Doc and Will, that will change throughout the story, since there was confirmation of his sexuality. I know I've said that many times, but I just thought it needed to be said again. Anyway! Good to be back! Love you all and enjoy!

Warnings: mentions of death, also unedited so sorry

Word Count: 712

—————————————

Sneak Peek

When Dustin had told the lot of them that they needed to set up his Cerebro, they didn’t think they’d need to hike. Mike and El had long since passed the equipment they held off to Max and Lucas. This was just so their hand-holding wouldn’t be interrupted. This also meant the two of them would be less tuckered out than the rest of the group. Dustin happily and excitedly led them all up a very, very high hill. The trip wouldn’t have been as tiresome had the sun not been beating down on them and their arms not being weighed down by the equipment.

“Dustin, I think I’ll drop dead soon.” Doc groaned. Just like her friends, she was beginning to sweat through her clothes. Though, she feared more for her outfit than anyone did theirs. It was brand-spanking new, a lavender shirt tucked into a brown corduroy mini skirt. Brenda picked it out especially for her and she was excited to wear it for the special occasion, but now she was sure she’d have to worry about sweat stains.

“Just hold out, we’re almost there.” He looked back at her with an encouraging smile.

“Aren’t we high enough?” Lucas huffed out.

“Cerebro works best at a hundred meters.”

Max sighed. “You know, I’m pretty sure people in Utah have telephones.”

“Yeah, but Suzie’s mormon.”

“Oh, shit.” Lucas widened his eyes. “She doesn’t have electricity?”

“That’s Amish, Lucas.” Doc corrected.

“Oh.”

“Then what are Mormons?” Will questioned.

“Super religious white people. They have electricity and cars and stuff, but… since I’m not Mormon, her parents would never approve.”

Doc frowned a bit. “Awe, I’m sorry, Dust.”

“Nah, it’s alright. It’s all a bit… Shakespearean.”

“Shakespearean?” Max raised a brow.

“Yeah. Like Romeo and Juliet.”

“Right.”

“Star-crossed lovers.”

“I got it.”

From a few feet behind them, Mike’s voice called out, “Hey, guys!” and they all turned around to see the great distance between them. “This is fun and all, but, uh…” He tapped his watch to indicate the time.

“I have to go home.” El explained.

“We’re almost there.” Dustin frowned.

“Sorry, man,” Mike shrugged. “Curfew.”

And with that, El clasped hands with Mike and giddily followed him back down the hill. The Party watched them with narrowed eyes and shaking heads as Dustin checked the time. “Curfew at four?”

“They’re lying.” Lucas informed.

“It’s been like this all summer.” Will shook his head again.

“It’s romantic.” Max shrugged.

“It’s gross.”

“It’s bullshit,” Dustin cut in with a sad tinge to his voice. “I just got home.”

Doc watched the couple scamper through the grass without a care or thought to how their friends would feel about them ditching their time together. And while Doc was unaware of how much room she did not have to talk, she knew that nothing would pull her away from their day dedicated to Dustin. No friends, mall, pool or boy could keep her from that.

Turning her head, she gave Dustin a one-shoulder shrug and a smirk. “Well, their loss. They won’t get to see Cerebro in action and they won’t get to meet Suzie, right?”

At that, a smile slowly graced the Henderson boy’s face. It was small and a bit trying, but it was a smile nonetheless. “Right. Onwards and upwards!” He cocked his head farther up the hill. “Suzie awaits!”

Max and Lucas threw their heads back with groans before following Dustin. Doc chuckled and adjusted the equipment in her arms, jogging a bit to catch up with them. Will was about to be right behind her, but he felt it again.

At first, it was the goosebumps. He reached behind his neck to feel the prickling there. But that presence that he felt at the mall was back. It had never really left, it just lingered all the other times. Now, though, it was here with them. It was somewhere hiding within the grass or maybe it was right in front of him and he just couldn’t see it.

“Will! Come on!” Doc called from farther up the hill. With a start, he flinched and turned around, running up the hill and catching up with them. Grinning brightly, Doc grabbed hold of his hand and continued their hike to Suzie.

—————————————

Taglist: @yurtletheturtlehenderson @crybabyalexxx @sapphicsyn @alexa-j-f @nailbatbitch @that-one-multifandom-chick @ariyabella @lonelywitchv2 @bilesxbilinskixlahey @frogserotonin @mymomsdisappointment @hewwofriends @billieissad @get0ut0fmyr00m @daylightsana @kaz3yo @satsuri3su @sassygentlemenjellyfish @thegirlwhowishedeveryonelived @unordinary-simp @raquel12 @roman0ffsheart @jjjennyxii @hereiamhereigo @wizardsgrace @meowiemari

(if you've changed your username or got a new account plz lmk! It's been awhile...)

The date for the release of "Chapter One: Suzie, Do You Copy?", will be announced soon!

[eddsworld-the-masquerade]

a comeback, perhaps?

Yes, really. I’m not joking and I have three points:  1. I’m one inconsistent bitch with a brainrot;  2. I need my delusions and escapism cuz man do four blood-sucking dudes sound more in-reality than whatever the fuck is going on in the actual real world around me rn;  3. I forgot what was the third point. It’s all the more absurd given just in the summer of this year I was certain I wouldn’t come back to it any time soon. What can I say...life do be like that. A fun little story of its own, but I’ll leave it out of this post. For now, let me share with you what I’ve been planning, what’s staying and what’s changing and how I’ll be approaching this AU/blog this time around. 

So, to start off...

The 🅱️ has to go: 

While still set in Vampire the Masquerade (World of Darkness) universe, the renewed version of this crossover AU won’t have anything to do with Bloodlines video game. Don’t get me wrong, I love Bloodlines still very much, it’s the game with most of my replays and what got me into VtM in the first place. But also, it is restricting, trying to align everything with its small setting/scope and, let’s be honest, doesn’t make much of a sense. Eddsworld’s British, the hell are they all doing in America? XP 

The tag is now eddsworld vtm au, without the letter b. 

What else gets thrown out? 

Plot: Pretty much all of it. I came up with the biggest plot points and am currently rewriting the entire script. At its core it’s still “four dudes tolerate each other’s shenanigans to survive and later learn they kinda don’t feel like chopping each other’s heads off (friendship goals)” but the rest...out the window it goes. 

Setting: As I said earlier, it’s weird. So with the help of Fall of London V5 book and some other sources of info on London in VtM, I moved the cast back to where they belong. 

Characters and character writing: This one might surprise you, but I really, REALLY don’t like the way I did them back then. I can’t revisit old comics/the demo without cringing so hard my face breaks XD Fishmalk Edd gives me most pain if I’m being honest...

While I’m keeping the basest, the basiesest core (Edd being chaotic bastard Malkavian, Tom being mean and cynical Nosf, Matt being old-fashioned but also a rebel at heart Torrie, and Tord being far less infected with rabies compared to other modern Brujah) I’m changing lots of their characterization, backstories and relationships with each other as well. So don’t expect something you expected from their older versions.

The same goes for every other character, and I’m getting rid of some that don’t serve much purpose anymore.  

What’s in store? 

New script is in the process. And while it is slowly processing, I will be updating most pages on this blog: specifically “About” and “Characters”, with new relevant information and art. I have archived everything these pages contained, and I’ll put the link to the Google Drive folder up in the “About” page for anyone who wishes to look at the old stuff. I won’t be deleting any of the older posts on the blog though.

Update schedule?

Can’t promise one. Life’s hectic now as hectic can possibly get. I will update once there is an update, but please try to be considerate and don’t ask me “when”. I will most likely go on hiatuses from time to time but I will try to warn in advance if it’s going to take long. Overall, this passion project is just that, a passion project. Not my job. Not something that gives me anything but mental satisfaction. Not even a tip jar. I’m working alone, with occasional help from friends who are kind enough to proof read and brainstorm with me (Nina, Jazz, Engi, Hawa, long live you beautiful human beings). So all I’m asking is some compassion and understanding from all of you u_u If you can do it for me I’m sure it’ll take me longer to lose interest this time XD  Ask box stays closed for now, I’ll reopen it once I’ll update all the pages. 

That’s it for the moment! Stay tuned, if you’d like! 

[howtobecomeadragon]

you might know who this is but whatever LOL. DOIN IT!!!

i am a little bit in love and have been for what is now going on 5 years. [for context, im afab, not openly queer] i swear she drives me insane like INSANE LOL. and. shes been dating and what is now common law married to my childhood sweetheart's oldest brother for 10+ years.

messy. ik. im not pursuing her. ive even avoided seeing her for 2 years. my breaking point? one too many times she's held my hand at a picturesque location, looking deeply into my eyes, telling me how much and exactly why she loves me (which, is alarming already on its own!) only to end it with "youre like....a cousin to me!" KILL ME.

she is so intense and notices and thinks about everything. EVERYTHING. fascinating, smart and sharp af. she embodies and looks like wind idek how to explain it. poised, cautious, steadily powerful. she knows who she is and what she wants. but getting a straight answer out of her is something else. she speaks like poetry. sometimes i love her for it, sometimes the lack of specificity makes me insane.

this summer was the first time i saw her after my absence to get over her, she was wearing this flowy linen white outfit, gold bands in her locs, delicate gold necklace and rings. i wanted to fall to my KNEES.

while catching up on the last two years, i told her i was queer. she told me she was too. and then she went on to tell me how her relationship (with the man who is my family friend) is going "well" aka falling apart. i asked my careful questions and got careful answers. then she says shes spending months in europe this spring. partner is not interested... n that i should come visit her while there. cant fucking breathe atp. i say maybe.

anyways. ive seen her once since then and had to put more distance between us bc she invited me over to bake apple pies. i like her too much and the fact that their 10+ year relationship is slowly falling apart is NOT GOOD for me to know about.

ANYWAY. MESSY!

oh man oh man. anon (i do know who this is hehe, but still!!! your name is anon rn), my sweet darling baby, i want to tuck you into bed so you can get some rest after this torture you've been enduring!!!!! this whole situation sounds like a real mindfuck. not the europe invitation 💀 jfc. i wish i had some good advice or a clear cut thing to say, but all i can do is wish you strength and send you as much care and love as possible. there are so many ways that all of this will end up in a lot of hurt. but also love!!! love for or from your friend, for or from your friend's partner, for or from yourself. you just gotta find a balance that you're okay with.

"she speaks like poetry" aaahh. good fucking luck out there, soldier. careful answers and speaking like poetry sounds endlessly frustrating to me. there's something beautiful about directness imo. but we all fall in love with different things. that's the beauty of life, right? everyone loves something different, so everyone different can be loved.

feel free to send updates if you ever want to get things off your chest. in my asks or as a dm. 🧡

anonymously tell me about your crush!!!

[polaroidbills]

10. everything i didn't say

pairing! - non-idol!jungwon x fem!reader

synopsis! - inspired by reckless by madison beer - jungwon promised y/n to never break her already damaged heart, but can he really keep it?

word count! - 442

october 15, 2021

(y/n's pov)

the rest of the sleepover was fine. we stayed up super late.

it's now breakfast and we're all eating at the table.

"and when heeseung said jake's only bitch is layld!" riki dies of laughter and so does everyone else.

when the time comes to leave, chaeyeon and i walk to the car.

"bye guys! see you at school!" i wave bye to them.

closing the door, chaeyeon starts driving.

the drive was silent. she had nothing to say and i had nothing to say. until she did.

"i heard minnie's coming back on monday."

"oh really? that's cool, we haven't talked in so long," i say slightly uninterested.

"also, i've made up my mind."

"about?"

"liking jungwon. i like him. a lot," i finally admit it.

"oh finally oh my gosh," she gasps.

october 17, 2021

it's monday. the day minnie's supposed to come back.

i walked into school, preparing myself in case i bump into minnie.

immediately i knew she's already here, there's a giant crowd.

i avoid it and head to my locker then class.

during break minnie runs up to me.

"hey y/n! we haven't talked in ages!" i turn to her.

she's looks so much different. she got prettier and her style definitely changed.

"oh hey! i actually wanted to talk to you!" i pull her away.

"i wanted to apologize," i start.

"i got mad without knowing the whole story and i'm sorry for that. i should've listened to you when you tried to explained," i look down feeling guilty.

"no no no, i should be apologizing. i should've called him out on it. i should've told you when it first started. i'm sorry and i forgive you," minnie apologizes too.

"i forgive you too."

"friends again?"

"of course!"

just like that, minnie and i have moved on and became amazing friends again.

"soo i hear you found a new guy? jungwon i think was his name?" she raises her eyebrows in curiosity.

"oh he's just a friend~" i say nervously.

"but? go on."

"i have feelings for him."

"there it is," she smiles. "you guys would be so cute together."

i laugh.

"but i would be careful. i heard jungwon or atleast his friend group has a reputation of playing and leading on girls," she warns me.

but that's not jungwon. he showed me i could trust him, right?

"but- i trust them. i know jungwon, he wouldn't do that. besides it's probably just rumours or just his friends," i try to excuse him.

"okay, i'm just saying you should be careful, that's all," she smiles at me.

previous masterlist next

author's note! - i need to go to a 5sos concert rn

taglist 🏷️ @boowoowho @fadedluvv @hursheys @enhacolor